exploring IDENTITY

exploringIDENTITY

Along with his own journey of self-discovery, Michael Chapin strives to help others with theirs.

by yasmin khan

any know Michael [that is the case.] I was working things out on my own, and I think Chapin as a charismatic, that was necessary for me to get to where I am now.” creative character around As a senior, Chapin served as a board member of the Genders and campus. Beneath his Sexualities Alliance (GSA). He first sought out a better understanding joyous persona, however, of the LGBTQ+ community when he joined the club. With a few is a determined soul years of club experience tucked under his belt, Chapin continued fighting an uphill battle to investing in learning about his peers and further developed his pointmake the school a more of-view from the vantage point of a leadership position. inclusive place. Coupled “Places where members of the LGBTQ+ community feel safe with his ongoing struggle are hard to find, and I wanted to make sure that GSA would be to be accepted himself, such a place,” Chapin said. “It also gives us a group of people who Chapin’s road-map to understand each other unconditionally and who can support each find community is one most high school students cannot fathom. other in ways others might not be able to.” Chapin came out as gay during his freshman year. Coincidentally, Chapin said his primary goal was to provide an auxiliary system: an this was also an election year–a period when outspoken political epicenter for both educating its members and the school as a whole opinions were at an all-time high. He was already anxious about how about LGBTQ+ issues. people would receive him. The election of President Donald Trump, “The default for our society is straight,” Chapin said. “When a self-proclaimed anti-LGBTQ+ politician, and his Vice President you are not the default, people are going to think of you as ‘other.’ Mike Pence, a supporter of electroshock conversion therapy, only Getting around that is sometimes difficult, but we are lucky enough propagated Chapin’s worries. to live in a country where being a part of the [LGBTQ+] community “In truth, I did not accept myself for years,” Chapin said. “Because of the stories on the news and [America’s] history of homophobia, especially aimed at young people, I thought being gay was a tragedy that would see me “It’s no one’s right to tell you who you kicked out of home or dead.” Although a better future seemed distant, Chapin are: that’s up to you.”wanted to embrace his true self after coming out. Initially, he sought validation from his peers. He spread himself thin for months on end, adamant on Michael Chapin maintaining good relationships. But after recognizing that genuine acceptance can only come from within, Chapin changed his outlook. “With the benefit of hindsight, I know now that if people had is more or less accepted.” turned on me, it would have eventually been for the best,” Chapin Despite feeling like an outsider sometimes, Chapin managed to said. “I wouldn’t have wanted to be around people who can’t accept create one of the most inclusive spaces in the school, according to someone else because they supposedly love wrong.” Lexi Bortnick ‘20. Looking back, Chapin even acknowledged that he would not “Through his work with GSA, I believe that Michael has given have done anything differently when he came out––including the individuals in the LGBTQ+ community an outlet that they struggled temporary period of doubting his self-worth. to find in the past,” Bortnick said. “Michael has made GSA more than “[I would like to think] that I would be more trusting if I [did] just a club––he has made it a smaller community within Woodward something differently,” Chapin said. “But, honestly, I do not think where all individuals feel as if their voices are heard. [He] has greatly 8

changed the stigma within [the school] through his panel discussions and creative club meetings.” Sharing Bortnick’s view, William Gore ‘20 said he admired Chapin for being so forthright about his sexuality and recognized him as a prominent LGBTQ+ role model throughout the school. “Michael has helped solve the issue that Woodward’s LGBTQ+ community was far less visible than it should have been,” Gore said. “This has increased the number of LGBTQ+ students who feel welcome on campus and know that they belong.” Chapin said he promoted the idea that each individual has the power to explore their own identity––it is their intrinsic right to be themselves. “Michael [teaches] the people around him that you do not have to listen to what people [think] your identity is,” Gore said. “Your identity comes from you alone, and other people do not get to define what it means for you.” Furthermore, Chapin always put his best foot forward in the community to ensure that everyone felt safe, loved and secure. “Whether he is working on a painting, helping a friend with their paper or planning the next GSA meeting, Michael is always 100% invested and ready to help anyone who may need him,” Bortnick said. There was a reciprocity to Chapin’s efforts: the blossoming community he tirelessly worked to create doubled as a personal outlet too. “I [am] impressed by just how strong these people are and how willing they are to tell us about the things they have gone through,” Chapin said. “Support from within the community at Woodward stems from a sense of sameness, I think. Just the act of gathering together, of celebrating who we are, is a form of support because we are not alone.” Besides working to promote a supportive environment at school, Chapin found other outlets for his identity. For example, he participated in a slam poetry event held during the Governor’s Honors Program which he attended for Communicative Arts. Chapin and 400 other strangers from the LGBTQ+ community stripped their feelings to the bone, unveiling their scars, fears, experiences and anger. “It was probably the most inspiring thing I have ever witnessed, and it gave me hope for the future,” Chapin said. “These people know so confidently that who they are is beautiful, something to be celebrated, something to take pride in.” Later, Chapin said he relied on that experience for comfort when the future seemed bleak. “Whenever the news is not so pretty, I think back to those people who stood up and spoke,” Chapin said. “That is, I think, the most important thing anyone can do to support those in need. Speak. Stand up. Usually, all we need is someone we know we can trust.” Chapin received another opportunity to share his story at the National Center for Civil and Human Rights in Atlanta, Georgia. His painting was placed inside the top five at their Social Justice exhibit. “My piece was about silence, and I got to give a speech about the topic,” Chapin said. “Afterward, a woman came up to me and thanked me. It was a simple gesture, but one that moved me. I could move people with my words, with my art. I want to continue to do that in the future, in college and beyond.” Although he found a support system, Chapin said he recognizes that others do not have his good fortune. “It is still illegal to be gay in 72 countries, with more than a few of those accepting the death penalty as punishment,” Chapin said. “There are people out there with more to say, who are full of stories that they will never be able to tell because the dice rolled wrong.” Chapin said he strives to reiterate that a sizable chunk of LGBTQ+ members continue to face severe backlash. While he tried to generate attention to the community to the best of his ability, Chapin said he could not do it alone. “It’s easy for me to sit here and tell my story because I am lucky,” Chapin said. “A large part of the oppression of the LGBTQ+ community is silence. We silence ourselves, and we are silenced by society. I am lucky enough to be able to use my voice, but others are not. We need other people to speak up with us. Those of us who ‘got lucky’ have the responsibility to help the members of our community who did not.” As a result, Chapin said he wanted to spread his positive mindset and share it with those who are struggling. “Ours is a still ongoing battle for recognition of equality, one that I think will unfortunately continue for the foreseeable future,” Chapin said. “That said, I do think we’ve made progress. We are still new, still working, and still fighting. Unfortunately, Woodward is [now] out of my hands. But in college, I hope to find a similar community and club to join. And if there isn’t, I’ll create one. Working and being with people with a shared experience, especially one as powerful as ours, is invaluable.”