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CHICAGO AUGUST AUGUS 2013
Kelly’s Pub
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AUGUST SPECIALS
2158 N. Halsted glascotts.com 773-281-1205
Sunday $6 Glascott’s Home-made Bloody Marys $15 Domestic Buckets Monday $5 Pints, $5 Call Cocktails $7 Top Shelf Cocktails
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Outdoor Cafe Beer of the Month:
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$3
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Tuesday $4 Blue Moon & Magic Hat #9 $5 Glasses of Wine Wednesday $4 Pints of Guinness, Harp, Bass and Magners $5 Call Cocktails Thursday $3 Domestic Bottles $4 Well Cocktails
ALL MONTH
PRE SEASON IS HERE! KICK IT OFF HERE!!!
Friday $5 Stella Pints $5 Bombs
8/11 vs PANTHERS 8/15 @ HOME vs CHARGERS 8/22-25 vs RAIDERS 8/29 @ HOME vs BROWNS
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We would like to thank all the readers of What’s Up Xtra Magazine for your continued support. The magazine was started over 8 years ago as a small local publication in Chicago and has grown throughout the area, surrounding suburbs , and now into Southern Wisconsin to be one of the most recognized comprehensive local bar directories of its kind. Our “grass root marketing” strategy has proven an effective tool for our publication and is designed to be used as a tool for our readers to plan where they will be spending their afternoons, evenings, and hard earned dollars. Magazines have maintained popularity with readers through the years and have proven that magazine advertising and readership will stand the test of time. We encourage our readers to support your communities and to patronize your local businesses!
TABLE OF CONTENTS
facebook funnies...
OUR ST A FF keith romack publisher
7 ALL MIXED UP 8 news AND STUFF
Lisa romack Sales Director
12 ask the wino 14 are you smarter than chester 16 fight card xtra ‘
Whats Up CHICAGO
JUNE 2012
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17 sudoku crossowrd wordfind 18 trivia open mic karaoke
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19 patios and beer gardens
Check us out online - Read the magazine, Photos & More... www.whatsupxtra.com Front page photo taken
Kelly’s Pub by Lisa
The name What’s Up Xtra Magazine is a registered trade name, and use of this name is strictly prohibited. The contents of this publication are copyrighted What’s Up Xtra Chicago Magazine -2012 We encourage our readers to write their stories, send photos, and make comments. All submissions sent to us by phone, email, fax, or handwritten become the property of What’s Up Xtra Chicago Magazine.
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jon obert editor
20 BARTENDER OF THE MONTH 25�28 bar directory
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Robert Christiansen Column Writer
27 dame nation
Suzi Lichner Contributing jokester
29 tales from the chris 30 country thunder 31 book review CHECK OUT
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lauren strec contributing writer We are always on the lookout for dynamic writers, photographers and sales staff to contribute to our publication If you are interested in joining our team or interested in advertising opportunities contact us at 773-288-9400 or email: whatsupxtra@yahoo.com WWW.WHATSUPXTRA.COM
Tue LIVE MUSIC Wed TRIVIA NIGHT - PRIZES
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Every Thursday & Saturday
2060 N. Cleveland 773.935.2060 www.fourfarthings.com ry ay Eve - Frid izers y et nda App o e M ric ay Drafts d p y 2 r e 1/ Eve er Lit l l Mi & f the 50 . o 3 $ eer drafts B $4 nth mo
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Who is Frank? A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the Cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank." The passenger replies, “Who the hell is Frank?” "Frank Fielding”, replied the cabbie. “He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Fielding every single time."
Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.' Mary Anne Radmacher, author of Lean Forward Into Life
The passenger replied, "There are always a few clouds over everybody." "Not Frank Fielding. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the GrandSlam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy." "Sounds like Frank was something really special!” exclaimed the passenger. Oh said the cabbie, "There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank could do everything right." "Wow, some guy then." The cabbie continued on. "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Fielding." The passenger then asked, "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?" The cabbie replied, "Well, I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his damn wife!" FACEBOOK.COM/WHATSUPXTRAMAGAZINE
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The Four Treys
Roscoe Village’s Friendliest Bar D A I L Y
Since 1884
Tavern
Sunday - Thursday:
S P E C I A L S
OPEN SATURDAY MIC
$2.50 Pabst Blue Ribbon
EVERYDAY: $4 Jameson shots
$5 bombs & $3 Well Drinks Saturday: $8 Bud Lite Pitchers Sunday: $5 Bloody Mary pints
Friday:
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TUESDAY
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BOWLING LEAGUE ON MONDAYS CALL & ASK FOR JEANINE
BIG BUCK SHOOTING GAME HERE!!!
PRIVATE PARTY ROOM - BOOK YOUR HOLIDAY PARTIES TODAY 3333 N. DAMEN
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DOG FRIENDLY TAVERN
ALL MIXED UP by Lisa Romack
Whether you’re hosting a summer party or just need to cool off with on a hot day, a good cocktail recipe is always good to have on hand. But specifically for summer, it’s nice to go beyond the typical Martini or gin and tonic and try something with a bit of seasonal flavor. So hit your local supermarket, do a bee-line for the produce section and grab some peaches, blueberries, grapefruit, and fresh mint to Mix It Up this month!
Peach Lemonade Cooler Ingredients: 1 medium sized ripe peach, peeled, halved and pitted ½ cup lemonade 1 ounce vodka of choice 1 oz Champagne Directions: Puree the peach and lemonade in a blender until smooth. Pour puree and vodka over ice in a cocktail shaker and shake until blended. Pour mixture into a rocks glass and top off with champagne. Garnish with a fresh peach slice. FACEBOOK.COM/WHATSUPXTRAMAGAZINE
Grapefruit Mojito Ingredients: ½ grapefruit, segmented & juice reserved 6 mint leaves ½ oz agave nectar or simple syrup Juice of ½ fresh lime ¼ cup reserved grapefruit juice 1 ½ oz white rum Club soda Directions: Muddle 2 grapefruit segments, mint, agave nectar or simple syrup and lime juice in the bottom of a cocktail shaker. Add grapefruit juice and rum, then fill the shaker ½ full with ice. Shake until very cold and pour into glass. Top with sparkling water (to taste) and garnish with remaining grapefruit segments. 773.213.4597
Blueberry Gin “Summer Storm” Ingredients: Handful of fresh blueberries Juice of ½ lime ½ oz simple syrup 1 ½ oz premium gin Club soda Directions: Puréed a handful of blueberries with a little bit of water. Fill a cocktail shaker with fresh lime juice, simple syrup, the blueberry purée, rum and ice. Shake until very cold and pour into a glass. Top with club soda and garnish with a few fresh blueberries and a sprig of mint.
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News & Stuff
A $19-a-Month Phone with Unlimited Data, Voice and Texts
A private wireless firm is doing what the big guys can't do (or won't.) Republic Wireless, a private firm in Raleigh, N.C., now has a nocontract service that offers unlimited data, voice and texts on its Android-based smartphone…all for just $19 a month! By far the lowest price offered today, the phone is a bit salty at $249, partly to help offset the low $19 monthly price. That still makes it cheaper than a $200 phone with a $30 to $70 a month contract that includes restrictions on use. Republic also has a $99 phone with a no-contract monthly cost of $29, unlimited. Both plans are available online at republicwireless.com. Unlike other phones, these connect calls and texts over Wi-Fi or to the Internet over Sprint and not the cellular networks. This can cause some loss of clarity. The phones are specially configured to work this way. So, if you’re current phone plan is breaking your bank, it just might be worth taking a look.
TSA Cancels Its Plan To Allow Small Knives On Planes The Transportation Security Administration has rescinded its plan to allow passengers to carry small pocketknives onto airliners. They reversed their earlier decision because of a chorus of complaints from the public, fliers and lawmakers who argued that the move would endanger the flying public. In March, the TSA announced it would allow some pocketknives, hockey sticks, golf clubs and other sports equipment aboard commercial flights. Allowing these items on board was supposed to be a move to free up TSA screeners to focus more on detecting explosives. Since then, virtually every group associated with commercial flying came out against the decision, including flyers, flight attendants, pilots and even TSA screeners. So folks, bring your crosswords to keep busy because there will be no knitting or whittling allowed.
Top Retirement Mistake: Thinking You'll Spend Much Less When that magic retirement day arrives, will you suddenly spend less, while reaping the benefits of your social security, pensions or investments? The answer, yes. You'll spend a little less, but the hard truth is: The less you have, the less you spend. Most retirees have less. According to the Census Bureau, out of 100 people who started working at age 25 and retired by 65, about 63 percent are dependent on Social Security, friends, relatives and charity. Just 4 percent have saved enough to pay for their retirement. The US Bureau of Labor Statistics Consumer Expenditure Survey shows that spending drops 14 percent immediately after retirement because retirees spend less on work related items and food. Even though 53 percent of retirees experience some drop in spending at retirement, 47 percent spend the same, or more. Retirees whose investments give them an equal income often finding they are spending more because they want to travel, shop, play golf, and pursue their hobbies. All of that costs money that was not regularly factored into their budget while working. Add the cost of those activities to inflation, and after the average retirement length of 18 years, savings will be stretched thin. A paid-off house can ease the strain of retirement economics, but the number of homeowners paying off their houses is dwindling. For most retirees, housing and related expenses are the top spending category. According to the Federal Reserve Board, about 25 percent of families headed by someone 75 or older still had a mortgage in 2010. In 1989, just 5.8 percent of the same families had a mortgage. Finally, don't assume you can continue to work into your 70’s and save money for retirement. You might not be healthy enough and, in fact, about 25 percent of retirees are forced out of the workforce for health reasons. Bottom line: start saving folks. It is never too early!
Work Notes…Do Interns Have a Better Shot at Landing a Permanent Job? Business graduates have a great chance of getting a job offer from their summer internship, according to business school placement data.
With employers scouting the business schools, students are under pressure to snag the coveted internships as soon as they enroll.
Banks and consulting firms are well-known to hire from summer internship roles. Companies in other fields are increasingly turning to summer MBA talent when they're ready to make permanent hires. Some lock in candidates almost a year ahead of their graduation date.
According to the Graduate Management Admission Council, about 69 percent of summer interns who apply for full-time positions receive offers. Interns in consulting, finance and accounting have even higher compensation rates. Now that’s some advice to take to the bank.
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We Sponsor any & all Sports Teams Full Kitchen & Menu 11am - 11pm Book Parties Now! Great Drink Packages Available
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Benefitting Misericordia Heart of Mercy 4pm - 7pm Complimentary Pig & Lamb Roast with all the trimmings LIVE MUSIC OUTSIDE by JURY’S OUT & ARTIE “SINATRA” FITGERALD
Augie’s 6th Annual Golf Outing @ White Pines Mon Sept 9th - Benefitting Make a Wish call for more info 773-296-0018
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They’re Not Hanging Wright An attorney arrived home late, after a very tough day trying to get a stay of execution. His last minute plea for clemency to the governor had failed and he was feeling worn out and depressed.
You are an unfinished work in progress. One of the good things about life's challenges: You get to find out that you're capable of being far more than you ever thought possible. Karen Salmansohn, author of 38 books on happiness and achievement
As soon as he walked through the door at home, his wife started on him about, “What time of night to be getting home is this? Where have you been? Dinner is cold and I'm not reheating it.” On and on and on the nagging went. Too shattered to play his usual role in this familiar ritual, he poured himself a shot of whiskey and headed off for a long hot soak in the bathtub, pursued by the predictable sarcastic remarks as he dragged himself up the stairs. While he was in the bath, the phone rang. The wife answered and was told that her husband's client, James Wright, had been granted a stay of execution after all. Wright would not be hanged tonight. Finally realizing what a terrible day he must have had, she decided to go upstairs and give him the good news. As she opened the bathroom door, she was greeted by the sight of her husband, bent over naked, drying his legs and feet. “They're not hanging Wright tonight,” she said. He whirled around and screamed, “For the love of God woman, don’t you ever stop!” FACEBOOK.COM/WHATSUPXTRAMAGAZINE
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“Where Friends & Fun Come First”
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The Diagnosis One day, a man was complaining to his friend about how much his elbow ached and that he was thinking of seeing a doctor. His friend said, “Don’t do that. There’s a computer at the local shopping center that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. And it only costs $10.00!”
773-545-3137
My biggest motivation? Just to keep challenging myself. I see life almost like one long university education that I never had - every day I'm learning something new. Sir Richard Branson, founder and chairman of Virgin Group, more than 400 companies
The man figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing and, after a brief pause, popped out a small slip of paper which read: You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water, avoid heavy labor. It will be better in two weeks. That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this computer could be fooled. So, he decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. Then, he went back to the store and located the computer, poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The machine again made the usual noises, flashed its lights and printed out the following analysis: Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with antifungal shampoo. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren’t yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don’t stop jerking off, your elbow will never get better! FACEBOOK.COM/WHATSUPXTRAMAGAZINE
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ASK A WINO... Driving Under Making a Healthy Choice The Speed Limit is Dangerous A State Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to himself, This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!” So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over. Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies -- two in the front seat and three in the back -- wide eyed and white as ghosts. The driver, obviously confused, says to him, Officer, I don’t understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the problem?” Ma’am,” the officer replies, you weren’t speeding, but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers.” Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed limit exactly... Twenty-two miles an hour!” the old woman says a bit proudly. The State Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle explains to her that 22” was the route number, not the speed limit. A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing out her error. But before I let you go, Ma’am, I have to ask... Is everyone in this car OK? These women seem awfully shaken and they haven’t muttered a single peep this whole time,” the officer asks. Oh, they’ll be all right in a minute officer. We just got off Route 119.”
Water to Wine An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding. The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. He says, "Sir, have you been
Wino: Mack Wilson Age: 60 Location: Under Bridge Likes: Shades, Chicken, Clean Sidewalks Dislikes: Ticks, Snow, Barbed Wire
Jill an Office Manager asks: Being a vegetarian is hard sometimes, but I think it’s totally worth it? Why do some people judge?
Wino: You kidding me, Sweet Pea? Give up a Steak for some vial weed. I’d rather nail my scrotum to a concrete wall with my remote control.
Jack a landscaper asks: Is it really true that briefs can like... hurt you down there?
Wino: In my case yes, I can’t take my drawers off right now. My dark and curly’s done grown right through em’. It’s not a pretty sight.
Alice, a teacher asks: Plastic surgery, yes or no?
drinking?" "Just water," says the priest. The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?" The priest looks at the bottle and says, "Good Lord! He's done it again!"
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Wino: Somebody shoulda talked to my old lady Pearl bout that. That old bat looked like her face caught on fire and someone stomped it out with golf shoes on. WWW.WHATSUPXTRA.COM
LIVE COUNTRY& WESTERN MUSIC
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OPEN TIL 4AM
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MON $1 Draft, $2 Domestic Bottles, $5 Pitchers
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TUE $2.75 Domestic Bottles WED $10 PITCHERS of Beer - LIVE BAND + Jam w/ Country Claude 9p-4a THU World Class KARAOKE 9p-4a FRI LIVE BAND - DIAMONDBACK 9p-4a SAT LIVE BAND - DIAMONDBACK 9p-5a SUN $10 PITCHERS of BEER + LIVE BAND
Mon, Tue 9a - 2a / Wed, Thur, Fri, Sun 11a - 4a / Sat 11a - 5a
Carol’s Kitchen serves Hot Sandwiches Late!
AUGUST HOROSCOPE ARIES: In conversations with your boss, good vibes seem to be there all the time. While it seems as though good luck is the cause, it's your good work that's appreciated.
LIBRA: Keep an eye out for spontaneous bursts of creativity. Make a note of the bright idea you have when relaxing outdoors or in the quiet time while sitting by a lake.
TAURUS: When teaching a coworker to take on one of your duties, be careful not to be too intent. Give instructions, but inject a little lightheartedness once in a while.
SCORPIO: When you think about your future, make your health a prime consideration. If you take good care of your body now, it could last you a lifetime.
GEMINI: Practice being more diplomatic when discussing a situation. Avoid blaming a person when something goes wrong. Focus on fixing the problem instead.
SAGITTARIUS: When it comes to financial matters, you may not be an expert. But if you stay anchored on your plans for the future, you'll discover you're an expert after all.
CANCER: An upcoming surprise could be good or not-sogood. It depends on what you read into it. Take the high road and you can find some advantages in it for you. LEO: At a gathering over the Labor Day Weekend, the role of peacemaker may fall to you, or at least it seems that way. Friendships could be at stake, so do what you can. VIRGO: Don't let the hot Dog Days of summer get you down. Go to cool places to revitalize yourself. Then remember that you love your work and get back to it.
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CAPRICORN: It's summertime, and love is in the air. Whether you have a partner or are looking for one, keeping love in mind, or the prospect of it, will take you far. AQUARIUS: Don't leave your creativity at the workplace. Take it home and do some decorating. It could mean painting, hanging a picture or finding new pillows for the sofa. PISCES: As it should be, your friends are important to you. Don't be too busy to get together with them. Think of a friend you haven't contacted in a while and call.
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Deciding to take a day off from his important job, a young broker went back to visit some of his old professors. Entering the school, he saw a dog attacking a small child. He quickly jumped on the dog and strangled it. The next day, the local paper reported the story with the headline "Valiant Student Saves Boy From Fearsome Dog." The broker called the editor of the paper and strongly suggested that a correction be issued, pointing out that he was no longer a student, but a successful Wall Street broker. The paper issued a correction, with a headline that read, "Pompous Stock Broker Kills School Mascot."
Minister Takes An Airplane Flight A minister was seated next to a cowboy on a flight to Texas. After the plane was airborne, drink orders were taken. The cowboy asked for a whiskey and soda, which was brought and placed before him. The flight attendant then asked the minister if he would like a drink. He replied in disgust, "I'd rather lose my soul to lust than let liquor touch my lips." The cowboy then handed his drink back to the attendant and said, "Me too. I didn't know we had a choice."
Attention Golfers
The State Department of Fish and Wildlife is advising hikers, hunters, fishermen and golfers to be on the alert for bears this year. They advise people to attach noise-producing devices, such as little bells, on their clothing to alert bears but not startle them. They also advise carrying pepper spray in case of an encounter. You should be able to recognize the presence of bears in an area by their droppings. Black bear droppings are smaller and contain berry residue and possibly squirrel fur. Grizzly bear droppings have little bells in them and smell like pepper spray.
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Quiet night? Want to have some fun with your bar guests? See who knows the goods by playing our August Trivia Quiz to see if anyone is smarter than Chester! Beer and a shot for the Winner! 1. The month of "August" was named after... a.) Saint Augustine b.) Augur, an official diviner of ancient Rome c.) Augustus Caesar d.) The adjective "august", meaning grandeur, because it was believed to be the grandest month 2. Born on August 17th, 1786, Davy Crockett was killed defending the Alamo. Which of these descriptions does NOT appear on his tombstone? a.) Pioneer b.)Patriot c.) Trapper d.) Congressman e.) Hero 3. On August 2nd, 1876, frontier marshal "Wild Bill" Hickok was shot and killed while playing poker at a saloon in Deadwood, South Dakota. The poker hand he was holding when shot is now known as the "dead man's hand". What was that hand? a.) Aces & 8s (Two Pair) b.) Four Deuces c.) Four Queens d.) Kings over Queens (A Full House) 4. On August 6th, 1926, New Yorker Gertrude Ederle became the first woman to do it. Do what? a.) Run for the U.S. Senate b.) Take birth control pills c.) Box professionally in Madison Square Garden d.) Swim the English Channel 5. Regis's former cohost, Kathie Lee Gifford, was born on August 16th, 1953. Which of these facts about her is NOT true? a.) She played "Kathie Honey" on the TV series "Hee Haw Honeys" b.) Her name at birth was "Kathryn Lee Epstein" c.) Her autobiography has been translated into 183 languages e.) She was born the same year as Frank Gifford's oldest son 6. Born on August 14th, 1961, actress Susan Olsen is best known as Cindy Brady on The Brady Bunch. What was Cindy's doll's name? a.) Mrs. Beasley b.) Kitty Karry All c.) Chatty Cathy d.) They never gave its name 7. On August 15th, 1969, the 3-day rock festival originally called the 'Woodstock Music and Art Fair' began. What was the original price for an 'Advance Sale THREE DAY TICKET' for one person? a.) $18.00 b.) $36.00 c.) $75.00 d.) $150.00 e.) $300.00 8. On August 8th, 1974, President Richard Nixon announced that he... a.) Would not run for President again b.) Was "not a crook" c.) Would not surrender the tapes d.) Would resign 9. On August 1st, 1976, Elizabeth Taylor got divorced one more time. Who did she divorce this time? a.) Eddie Fisher b.) Senator John Warner c.) Richard Burton (the first divorce) d.) Richard Burton (the second divorce) 10. On August 3rd, 1994, Stephen G. Breyer made news when he... a.) Became the first casualty of Operation Desert Storm b.) Crossed the Pacific in a one-person sailboat c.) Was sworn in as a Supreme Court Justice d.) Sold his Ice Cream Company for $20 Billion
Answers 6. Kitty Karry All 7. $18.00 8. Would resign 9. Richard Burton (the second divorce) 10. Was sworn in as Supreme Court Justice
Student Vs. Stock Broker
Are You Smarter Than CHESTER “The Sock Monkey”?
1. Augustus Caesar 2. Hero 3. Aces & 8s (Two Pair) 4. Swim the English Channel 5. Her autobiography has been translated into 183 languages
THE LIGHTER SIDE
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*Cubs Game Day excluded
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#1 LIVE SHOW IN WRIGLEYVILLE
www.FightCard.net FIGHTCARD 50: RELOADED RESULTS FIGHTCARD 50 went off on July 20th with 10 explosive match ups that had the whole crowd on their toes. Stay tuned for our next event.
Want to to Compete? Compete? Want Contact Nilo @ @ Contact Nilo 312.369.4180 312.369.4180
1. Derrek Jackson vs. Armando Calderon Winner: Armando Calderon wins via a split decision. 2. John Aguda vs. Erick Boulanger Winner: John Aguda wins via unanimous decision. 3. Jordan Chambliss vs. James Jones Winner: James Jones wins via a split decision. 4. Rick Dimitrov vs. Edson Brito Winner: Rick Dimitrov wins by submission via armbar in 2:36 of Round 1. 5. Tito Garcia vs. Zack Coley Winner: Tito Garcia wins via tapout due to guillotine choke in 2:23 of Round 1. 6. David Enriquez vs. Jason Thompson Winner: Jason Thompson wins via split decision. 7. James Camisa vs. Isaac Reyes Winner: Isaac Reyes wins by TKO in 1:48 of Round 1. Referee stopped the fight due to strikes. 8. C.J. Richmond vs. Steve Holt Winner: Steve Holt wins by TKO in 2:34 of Round 2. Referee stopped the fight due to strikes. 9. Ray Bunker vs. Theodore Green Winner: Ray Bunker wins via unanimous decision. 10. Daniel James vs. Gabe Rodriguez Winner: Daniel James wins by TKO in 0:53 of Round 1. Referee stopped the fight due to strikes.
RING GIRL INQUIRY? Email Brian@FightCard.net
(Pictures by Carlos Acevedo-Chicago Combat. Pictured: Ray Bunker with Coaches & Jordan Chambliss
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Wine Lovers’ Favorites
SUDOKU Rules: Every row, column and 3x3 box must have numbers 1 to 90
BARBERA BAROLO BORDEAUX BURGUNDY CAMPARI CHABLIS CHIANTI CLARET FUME BLANC GIGONDAS
GRAVES LAMBRUSCO MADEIRA MALBEC MARSALA MARTINI MEDOC MERLOT MOSEL MUSCADET
MUSCAT PORT RIOJA ROSE SANCERRE SAUTERNE SHERRY SHIRAZ VOUVRAY
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Trivia Every Monday
The Beetle 2532 W Chicago Ave, Chicago Buffalo Wild Wings 7020 Carpenter Rd, Chicago Kirkwood Bar & Grill 2934 N Sheffield Ave, Chicago
Every Tuesday
The Reservoir 844 W Montrose Ave, Chicago Schubas Tavern 3159 N Southport Ave, Chicago Sheffield's 3258 N Sheffield Ave, Chicago The Garage Bar & Sandwiches 6154 N Milwaukee Ave, Chicago
Every Wednesday Fizz Bar & Grill 3220 N Lincoln Ave, Chicago
Four Farthings (8:00pm)
2060 N Cleveland Ave, Chicago
Karaoke Every Tuesday Bonsai Bar & Lounge 3503 N Halsted St, Chicago
Every Thursday Carol’s Pub (9:00pm-4:00am) 4659 N Clark, Chicago
Four Farthings (9:30pm) 2060 N Cleveland Ave, Chicago
Every Friday
MCM Pub & Eatery (8:00pm) 3906 N Cicero Ave, Chicago Peek Inn (9:00pm) 2825 W Irving Park Rd, Chicago
Every Saturday
Four Farthings (10:30pm) 2060 N Cleveland Ave, Chicago Four Treys (10:00pm) 3333 N Damen, Chicago MCM Pub & Eatery (8:00pm) 3906 N Cicero Ave, Chicago
Every Thursday Fizz Bar & Grill 3220 N Lincoln Ave, Chicago Rockit Burger Bar 3700 N Clark St, Chicago
Open Mic Every Tuesday Four Treys (10:00pm) 3333N Damen, Chicago
Pressure Billiards & Cafe 6318 N Clark St, Chicago
Every Thursday
Red Line Tap 7006 N Glenwood Ave, Chicago
Every Sunday
Kitchen Sink 1107 W Berwyn Ave, Chicago
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Dueling Pianos Every Thursday, Friday & Saturday Sluggers(9:00pm) 3540 N Clark, Chicago
Call 773-288-9400 to list your Trivia, Karaoke, Open Mic, and Dueling Piano Nights WWW.WHATSUPXTRA.COM
CLUB BELMONT
Big John’s
LANDMARK PUB
5135 N. Oriole Harwood Heights 708.867.6533
7844 W. Belmont 773.589.2808
The Booze is Cheap & The Entertainment is Free!!!
BIKES, BABES & BOOZE
Sick and Wrong!!!
Patio and Beer Gardens
Have a cold one on a deck near you.
Glascott’s
2158 N. Halsted
Lincoln Park
El Jardin
3335 N Clark St
Wrigleyville
Four Farthings
2060 N. Cleveland
Lincoln Park
Slugger’s
3540 N. Clark St
Wrigleyville
Mo Daily’s
6070 N. Northwest Hwy
Norwood Park
Augie’s
1721 W. Wrightwood
Lincoln Park
Kelly’s Pub
949 W Webster
Liincoln Park
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VOTE FOR YOUR FAVORITE AUGUST BARTENDER
W
r u tra o X ho’s y te i w r o fav nder? e t r ba
Go to
facebook.com/wassupxtramagazine ‘Like’ the page and ‘Like’ or comment on the bartenders photo or text 773.288.9400. The winner will receive a 4 hour limo bus from LIMOSALIVE.NET for 24 of their friends.
Bartender: Jessica River Shannon 425 W Armitage Ave, Chicago Signature Drink: Famous Bloody Mary
JULY BARTENDER OF THE MONTH IS...
Ingredients: UV Vodka, A1, Guinness, Other Goodies Words of Wisdom: “It is better to spend money like there’s no tomorrow then to spend tonight like there’s no money.”
Bartender: Britteny Pony 1638 W Belmont Ave, Chicago Signature Drink: Pony Espresso Ingredients: Pinnacle Whipped, Godiva White, Starbucks Instant Coffee Words of Wisdom: "Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat."
Bartender: Jeanine Four Treys 3333 N. Damen Ave, Chicago Signature Drink: Dirty Martini Ingredients: Smirnoff, Dry Vermouth, Olive Juice Words of Wisdom: “If you don’t drink, then all of your stories suck and end with, “And then I got home.”
CONGRATULATIONS
COURTNEY NEWPORT BAR 334 W Newport
“I spell liver... L-I-Q-U-O-R”
Rules: All service employees are eligible to win. The service employee who receives the most votes in the month wins. You can submit your vote by texting (773) 288-9400 or go to facebook.com/whatsupxtramagazine “like” our page and vote under the bartender’s photo.
*The Pub Crawl will begin at the employee of the months bar and the limo bus will accommodate 24 passengers. Gratuity not included and must be paid prior to service
Only two votes are counted per person and voting polls close on August 20th.
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The Peek Inn KARAOKE EVERY FRIDAY NIGHT @ 9PM FREE JUKE BOX EVERY SATURDAY AFTER 10PM 2825 W. Irving Park Rd
A Man’s Best Friend A man was leaving a convenience store with his morning coffee when he noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A black hearse was followed by a second black hearse about 50 Feet behind the first one. Behind the second hearse was a solitary man walking a dog on a leash. Behind him, a short distance back, were about 200 men walking single file. The man couldn't stand the curiosity. He respectfully approached the man walking the dog and said: "I am so sorry for your loss, and this may be a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen a funeral like this. Whose funeral is it?" The man replies, "My wife's." ''What happened to her?" asked the concerned onlooker. "She yelled at me and my dog attacked and killed her." He inquired further, "But who is in the second hearse?" The man answered, "My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife when the dog turned on her." A very poignant and touching moment of brotherhood and silence passed between the two men. "Can I borrow the dog?" The man replied, "Get in line." FACEBOOK.COM/WHATSUPXTRAMAGAZINE
SUNDAY:
Weekend Recovery - 12oz Frosted Glass of Absolut Vodka Bloody Mary w/ a Pickle slice $3.25
Working Man’s Deal - Bucket of 5 Iced Domestic Bottles and a Tombstone Pizza - $15 TUESDAY: Bud Buddies - 2 Bud or Bud Light - $5.00 WEDNESDAY: J&J Blasters - Shot of Jameson or Jager $3.00 THURSDAY: THIRSTY THURSDAY - 16oz Aluminum Cans or Twist Offs $3.00 FRIDAY: TGIF is Miller Time - Lite, High Life or MGD $2.75 SATURDAY: Foreign Delight - Bottles of Heinken, Corona or Amstel Light $3.00 MONDAY:
FREE POOL EVERYDAY ALL DAY Ask Bartender about our Board Games GOD BLESS OUR TROOPS 773.267.5197
Peek Inn “like us” on Facebook
Don’t Take Him For Granted A woman came home early from work and found her husband in the bedroom making love to a very attractive woman. She cried, “You are a disrespectful pig! How dare you do this to me! I have been a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I’m leaving you and I want a divorce right away!” Her husband replied: “Hang on just a minute love so at least I can tell you what happened.” She sobbed, “Fine, go ahead, but they’ll be the last words you’ll say to me!” So, the husband began. “Well, I was getting into the car to drive home, and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn’t eaten for three days. So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn’t eat because you’re afraid you’ll put on weight. Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don’t wear because you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don’t wear because I don’t have good taste. I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don’t wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don’t wear because someone at work has a pair the same. The husband took a quick breath and continued: “she was so grateful for my understanding and helps that as I walked her to the door, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, “Please tell me, do you have anything else that your wife doesn’t use?“ 773.213.4597
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73rd Sturgis Motorcycle Rally
Motorcycle enthusiasts, collectors and riders worldwide have marked August 5-11, 2013, on their calendars since last August. They'll gather with half million others in the town of Sturgis, South Dakota, for one of the biggest and most famous of all motorcycle rallies in the world. Sturgis has a population of only 7,000, but manages to host this metropolitan-sized party with practiced ease. It makes room for over 800 venders selling everything from fried chicken and burgers to tattoos, anything leather, fancy jewelry and brew. Oh, and they demo every type of bike on the market and sell all manner of things to gussy them up. When people think of bikers, a vision of the Hells Angels often comes to mind. The burly, whiskered riders strike a heart-stopping moment as they roar through town by the dozen. Although outlaw clubs make their presence known, there are also many teachers, doctors, lawyers and all sorts of other workers who just like to enthuse over the candy store atmosphere. For adults who love the history of cycles and ďŹ nd custom-designed bikes exotic and awesome, the bars big enough for bikers to ride cycles through, massive crowds and rowdiness make dealing with the din worth the trip. For newcomers, Sturgis is a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Bikers have the chance to participate in an organized ride through the spectacular Black Hills with the mayor and other dignitaries, FACEBOOK.COM/WHATSUPXTRAMAGAZINE
the beer belly and tattoo contests, the races, the hard-rock concerts every night featuring some of the greatest names in country and rock, and camping with new and old friends on the Buffalo Chips 580 acreage. Rally attendees also have the opportunity to visit the American Veterans Traveling Tribute Wall, which is set up on the Buffalo Chips Field of Flags with its BattleďŹ eld Cross. It honors those who have fallen in the line of duty. The Patriot Guard Riders and active duty military personnel assist in putting up the wall. So if you love to ride, or just love a great party, mark your calendar for next August and get ready to rumble! 773.213.4597
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BAR DIRECTORY
Where are you going tonight?: Lakeview East - Wrigleyville - Southport Bar Celona
3474 N. Clark
773-244-8000
Mullen’s
Bendan’s Pub
3169 N. Broadway
773-929-2929
Murphys Bleachers 3655 N. Sheffield
773-281-5356
Bernie’s
3664 N Clark
773-525-1898
Mystic Celt
3443 N. Southport
773-529-8550
Big City
1010 W. Belmot
773-935-1138
Newport Bar
1344 W Newport
773-325-9111
Blarney Stone
3424 N. Sheffield
773-348-1078
Nick’s Uptown
4015 N Sheridan
773-975-1155
Brew & View
3145 N. Sheffield
773-929-7150
North End
3733 N Halsted
Buck’s Saloon
3439 N. Halsted
773-525-1125
Paddy Long’s
1028 W Diversey
773-348-9711
Clark Street Bar 3040 N. Clark
773-281-6690
Parrots Bar
754 W Wellington
773-281-7878
Coobah
3423 N. Southport
773-528-2220
Piano Bar
3801 N. Clark
773-528-4033
Cubby Bear
1059 W Addison
773-327-1662
Raw Bar & Grill
3720 N Clark St
773-348-7291
Cullen’s Bar
3741 N. Southport
773-975-0600
Rebel Bar
3462 N. Clark
773-348-9084
Dram Shop
3040 N. Broadway
773-549-4401
Redmond’s
3358 N Sheffield
773-404-2151
Fiesta Cantina
3407 N. Clark
773-975-5980
Roadhouse 66
3330 N. Clark
773-525-8166
Friar Tucks
3010 N. Broadway
773-327-5101
Rockit Bar
3700 N.Clark
773-645-4400
Full Shilling
3724 N. Clark
773-248-3330
Rocks
3463 N. Broadway
773-472-0493
Goose Island
3535 N. Clark
773-832-9040
Roscoe’s
3356 N. Halsted
773-281-3355
Higgins Tavern
3259 N. Racine
773-281-7637
Schoolyard
3258 N Southport
773-528-8226
Holiday Club
4000 N. Sheridan
773-348-9600
Schubas Tavern 3159 N Southport
773-525-2508
Irish Oak
3511 N. Clark
Sheffield’s
3258 N Sheffield
773-281-4989
Jack’s Bar
2856 N Southport
773-404-8400
Sidetracks
3349 N. Halsted
773-477-9189
Jacklyn’s Bar
3400 N. Broadway
773-404-5149
Sluggers
3540 N Clark
773-248-0055
Jake’s Pub
2932 N Clark
773-248-3318
Smart Bar
3730 N Clark
773-549-4140
Joe’s On Broadway 3563 N Broadway
773-528-1054
Sopo
3418 N. Southport
773-348-0100
John Barleycorns 3524 N. Clark
773-549-6000
Southport Lanes 3325 N. Southport
773-472-6600
Justin’s
3358 N Southport
773-929-4844
Sports Corner
952 W. Addison
773-929-1441
Kit Kat Lounge
3700 N Halsted
773-525-1111
Take 5 Bar
3747. Southport
773-871-5555
L&L Tavern
3207 N. Clark
773-528-1303
Toon’s
3857 N. Southport
773-935-1919
Little Jim’s
3501 N. Halsted
773-871-6116
Town Hall Pub
3340 N Halsted
773-472-4405
Lucky’s 3
472 N. Clark
773-549-0665
Trace
3714 N. Clark
773-477-3400
Mad River
2909 N. Sheffield
773-935-7500
Trader Todd’s
3216 N Sheffield
773-348-3250
Matilda
3101 N Sheffield
773-883-4400
Vaughans Pub
2917 N. Sheffield
773-281-8188
Matisse
674 W. Diversey
773-528-6670
Vines
3554 N. Clark
773-327-8572
Merkles
3516 N Clark
773-244-1025
Wrigleyville North 3900 N Sheridan
773-929-9543
Metro Smart Bar 3730 N Clark
773-549-4140
Yak-Zies Bar
773-525-9200
Monsignor Murphys
773-348-7285
3019 N. Broadway
FACEBOOK.COM/WHATSUPXTRAMAGAZINE
773.213.4597
3527 N Clark
773-325-2319
7
3710 N Clark
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BAR DIRECTORY
Where are you going tonight?:
Lincoln Park & Old Town Augie's
1721 W. Wrightwood
773-296-0018
McGinny's Tap
313 W. North
773-943-5228
Bird's Nest
2500 N. Southport
773-472-1502
Mickey's
2450 N. Clark
773-435-0007
Blue's
2519 N. Halsted
773-525-8317
O' Brien's
1528 N. Wells
312-787-3131
Burton's Place
1447 N. Wells
773-664-4699
Old Town Ale
219 W. North
773-944-7020
Burwood Tap
7242 W. Wrightwood
773-525-2593
Old Town Pub
1339 N. Wells
773-266-6789
Clybar
417 N. Clybourn
773-388-1877
O'Malley's West 2249 N. Lincoln
773-935-2719
Corcoran's
1615 N. Wells
773-440-0885
Orso's
1401 N. Wells
773-787-6604
Delilah's
2771 N. Lincoln
773-472-2771
Ravens
2326 N. Clark
773-348-1774
Duffy's
422 W. Diversey
773-549-9090
River Shannon
425 W. Armitage
773-944-5087
Durkin's
810 W. Diversey
773-525-2515
Rocks
1301 W. Schubert
773-472-7728
Elbo Room
2817 N. Lincoln
773-549-5549
Saluki Bar
1208 N. Wells
773-274-1824
Field House Pub 2455 N. Clark
773-348-6489
Suite Lounge
1446 N. Wells
773-787-6106
Four Farthings
2060 N. Cleveland
773-935-2060
The Apartment
2251 N. Lincoln
773-348-5100
Frank's
2503 N. Clark
773-549-2700
The Local Option 1102 W. Webster
773-348-2008
Galway Arms
2442 N. Clark
773-472-5555
The Other Side
2436 N. Clark
773-525-8238
Gamekeepers
345 W. Armitage
773-549-0400
Tin Lizzie
2483 N. Clark
773-549-1132
Glascott's
2158 N. Halsted
773-281-1205
Tonic Room
2447 N. Halsted
773-248-8400
Goose Island
1800 N. Clybourn
773-915-0071
Weeds
1555 N. Dayton
312-943-7815
Halligan's Pub
2274 N. Lincoln
773-472-7940
Wellingtons
1300 W. Wellington
773-528-0654
Halsted Harp
2138 N. Halsted
773-348-3665
Wise Fools Pub 2270 N. Lincoln
773-929-1300
Hidden Shamrock 2732 N. Lincoln
773-883-0304
Witts
773-528-7032
Irish Eyes
773-348-9548
Wrightwood Tap 1059 W. Wrightwood
2
2519 N. Lincoln
Joe's Sports Bar 940 W. Weed
773-337-3486
John Barleycorn 2300 N. Lincoln
773-348-8899
John's Place
1200 W. Webster
773-525-6670
Kelly's Pub
949 W. Webster
773-281-0656
Kendall's Pub
2263 N. Lincoln
773-348-7200
Kincade's
950 W. Armitage
773-348-0010
Kingston Mines
2548 N. Halsted
773-477-4646
Lincoln Station
2432 N. Lincoln
773-472-8100
Lincoln Tap
3010 N. Lincoln
773-868-0060
Lion Head Pub
2251 N. Lincoln
773-348-5100
Max Bar
2247 N. Lincoln
773-549-5884
McGee's
950 W. Webster
773-549-8200
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2913 N. Lincoln
773-459-4949
A Windy Day An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship‚ holding her hat on tightly so that it wouldn't blow off in the wind. A gentleman approached her and said, "Pardon me‚ madam. I do not intend to be forward‚ but did you know that your dress is blowing up in this high wind?" "Yes‚ I know‚" said the lady. "I need both hands to hold onto this hat." "But‚ madam‚ you must know that your privates are exposed!" said the gentleman in earnest. The woman looked down and then back up at the man and replied‚ "Sir‚ anything you see down there is 85 years old. I just bought this hat yesterday!"
WWW.WHATSUPXTRA.COM
BAR DIRECTORY
Where are you going tonight?: Northwest
Paddy Macks
4157 N. Pulaski
773-279-9300
Babe’s
4416 N. Milwaukee
773-545-3137
Rabbits
4945 W Foster
773-736-5766
Bill’s Pub
4104 N. Pulaski
773-202-0020
Roman’s
6448 N. Milwaukee
773-467-9827
Brigadoon
5748 W Lawrence
773.777.2403
Sidekicks
4424 W Montrose
773-545-6212
Cabaret Lounge 6101 W. Montrose
773-736-2337
Six Penny Bit
5800 W. Montrose
773-545-2033
Casual Tap
5924 W Montrose
773-283-9490
Thatch Pub
5707 N. Milwaukee
773-763-8179
Charlotte’s Bar
6000 W Gunnison
773-775-3616
Three Counties
5856 N. Milwaukee
773-631-3351
Club Belmont
7844 W. Belmont
773-598-2808
Tommy’s
6954 W Higgins
773-631-4451
Di’s Den
5100 W Irving Park
773-736-7170
Trinity Pub
5943 N. Northwest
773-763-0095
Dugan’s
6051 N. Milwaukee
773-467-5555
Vaughan’s Pub
5485 Northwest
773-631-9206
Edison Park Inn 6713 N. Olmsted
773-775-1404
Windsor Tavern
4530 N. Milwaukee
773-736-3400
Emerald Isle Pub 2537 W Peterson
773-561-6674
Zachary’s
5368 N Milwaukee
773-792-0933
Fantasy Lounge 4400 N Elston
773-685-8083
Filonek’s
6213 N. Milwaukee
773-775-5010
Galvin’s Public
5901 W Lawrence
773-205-0570
Gladstone’s
5734 N. Milwaukee
773-763-3385
Ham Tree Inn
5333 N. Milwaukee
773-792-2072
Harry’s On Elston 5943 N. Elston
773-774-4166
Harwood Bar
6438 W. Montrose
708-867-7781
Hops N Barley
4359 N Milwaukee
773-286-7415
Jet’s Public Hou 6148 N. Milwaukee
773-775-7587
Jimmy Macks
5581 N. Northwest
773-631-1466
Joe E’s Lounge
4206 W Irving Park
773-283-3422
Landmark Pub
5135 N. Oriole
773-867-6533
Lasko’s
5525 N Milwaukee
773-774-9800
Lizard Lounge
3058 W. Irving Park
773-463-7599
Margaret’s
5134 W. Irving Park
773-685-4493
Mary’s Place
6300 N. Milwaukee
773-775-7587
MCM Pub
3906 N. Cicero
773-736-2644
McNamaras
4328 W Irving Park
773-725-1800
Mo Dailey’s
6070 N. Northwest Hwy
773-774-6121
Moretti’s
6727 N. Olmsted
773-631-1223
Mrs. O’Leary’s
4368 N. Milwaukee
773-427-7300
Mug Shots
7718 W. Addison
773-625-8466
Murrays
5522 N Elston
773-774-3466
Night Caps
5007 W Irving Park
773-282-8654
Nil’s Tap
5734 N. Elston
773-594-1288
FACEBOOK.COM/WHATSUPXTRAMAGAZINE
773.213.4597
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BAR DIRECTORY
Where are you going tonight?:
Lakeview West/ Roscoe Village / North-Center / Lincoln Square / Albany Park / Ravenswood Andersonvile 240 Lounge
3948 W. Lawrence
773-267-0474
Huetten Bar
4721 N. Lincoln
773-561-2507
42 Latitude
3341 N Western
773-910-1473
Jury's
4337 N. Lincoln
773-935-2255
Abbey Pub
3420 W. Grace
773-478-4408
Katerina's
1902 W. Irving
773-348-7592
Atlantic Bar
5062 N. Lincoln
773-506-7090
Keenan O' Reilly's 3916 N. Ashland
773-857-3800
Bad Dog
4535 N. Lincoln
773-334-4040
Leadway Bar
5233 N. Damen
773-728-2663
Big Joe’s
1818 W Foster
773-784-8755
Long Room
1612 W. Irving
773-665-4500
Black Rock
3614 N. Damen
773-348-4044
Margie's Pub
4145 N. Lincoln
773-477-1644
Brendan’s Too
3135 W. Montrose
773-463-2771
Mulligan's
2000 W. Roscoe
773-549-4225
Brownstone
3937 N. Lincoln
773-528-3700
Mutiny
2428 N. Western
773-486-7774
Carol’s Pub
4659 N Clark
773-334-2402
Oakwood 83
1969 W. Montrose
773-327-2785
Celtic Crown
4301 N. Western
773-588-1110
O'Donovan's
2100 W. Irving
773-478-2100
Chicago Joe's
2256 W. Irving
773-478-7000
O'Lanagan
2335 W. Montrose
773-583-2252
Chief O'Neills
3471 N. Elston
773-583-3066
Peek Inn
2825 W. Irving Park
773-267-5197
Christina's Place 3759 N. Kedzie
773-463-1768
Rail Bar
4709 N Damen
773-878-9400
Claddagh Ring
773-271-4794
Richochet's
4644 N. Lincoln
773-271-3127
Cody's Public House 1658 W. Barry
773-528-4050
Riverview
1958 W. Roscoe
773-871-1200
Daily's Bar
4560 N. Lincoln
773-561-6198
Roscoe Villiage Pub 2159 W. Addison
773-472-6160
Farraguts
5240 N Clark
773-728-4903
Save More Lounge 4060 N. Lincoln
773-281-1444
Finley Dunnes
3458 N. Lincoln
773-477-7311
Side Street
1456 W. George
773-327-1127
Fizz
3220 N. Lincoln
773-348-6000
Silvie's
1902 W. Irving
773-871-6239
Foley's
1841 W. Irving
773-929-1210
Small Bar
2956 N. Albany
773-509-9888
Four Moon
1847 W. Roscoe
773-929-6666
Stadium West
3188 N. Elston
773-866-2450
Four Shadows
2758 N. Ashland
773-248-9160
Ten Cat Tavern
3931 N. Ashland
773-935-5377
Four Trey's Pub 3333 N. Damen
773-549-8845
The Temple
3001 N. Ashland
773-248-0990
Fuller's Pub
3203 W. Irving
773-478-8060
Uptown Lounge 1136 W. Lawrence
773-878-1136
Gio’s
4857 N. Damen
773-334-0345
Villiage Tap
2055 W. Roscoe
773-883-0817
Hidden Cove
5336 N. Lincoln
773-275-3955
Waterhouse
3407 N. Paulina
773-871-1200
Hidden Cove
5338 N. Lincoln
773-275-6711
Wild Goose
4265 N. Lincoln
773-281-7112
Horseshoe
4115 N. Lincoln
773-248-1366
Windy City Inn
2257 W. Irving
773-588-7088
2306 W. Foster
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TA L E S F R O M T H E C H R I S
Saturday Morning at Starbucks By Rob Christiansen
Forward leaning and seemingly desperate, I enter Starbucks, my 35-pound typewriter wrapped in my arms at my chest. Standing customers awaiting service meet my eye, wary that I’ll tip over. They yield the floor to me as though sheer politeness might straighten me up. A customer arises from his chair and helps me to his small table, graciously walking backwards in doing so. My benefactor then searches in vain for elsewhere to sit before taking his laptop and heading out. The guarantee of getting a table at Starbucks is why I prefer a typewriter to a laptop. “Your check bounced, Bozo,” a street tough wearing a gray suit and hat says.
I softly type six more letters, B-o-g-a-r-t, and then stop typing. I pretend to read a newspaper left behind by a benefactor who had helped me carry my typewriter to his former table. Bogart frightens me to death and I feel like we’re all hostages at Starbucks and that no one can leave. I know that’s redundant, but I’m hyperventilating and getting goosebumps and I’m hyperventilating. Ok. Focus: Bogart and Bozo are acquaintances who met at a party. Bogart had access to Quaaludes and Bozo knew a buyer, which is a rare feat since almost no one takes Quaaludes anymore. An instinct afforded only to those who are in the bright light tunnel “welcome wagon” tells me this. I wonder how much a Quaalude costs. I wonder if I should ask Bozo. I feel like a war correspondent, like Ernest Hemingway, who began his career as a war correspondent for the Kansas City Star. And here I am, in the Midwest, too. The list of our similarities grows and grows. I know I keep on rambling, I know, but only because I guess I ramble incoherently when I’m, like, maximum scared.
I was writing about a blonde customer. Why are we at Starbucks if not to appropriate images of beautiful still life in original fantasies? I was pounding a line about how the distribution of fat stored in her buttocks, hips and breasts made me want to go into the fat distribution business.
“My bank charged me ten dollars for depositing your check,” Bogart angrily says. “I want my money now, Bozo. Cash only.” I presume that Bogart nodded toward the ATM. I’m hiding behind the wide-open newspaper and shaking it like a leaf. Presumptions root in imaginations, tools of writers like Ernest Hemingway and me….I’m rambling.
But the sight of the stylish hooligan puts the story about the Starbucks customer dame on ice. Now, I watch him. He’s three, four or five feet away. I can’t judge depth unless I’m home. He must have walked in when I was changing ribbons, blowing on whiteout or in the backseat with the dame, who I’d adorned as a flapper.
“How did you know I was here?” Bozo asks. The question is off-topic and could only do him harm. It infuriates Bogart, who hears it as Bozo’s lame attempt to shift gears and gain a sandal foothold on a slippery slope he suddenly finds himself on. In all fairness to Bozo, however, he only wants to know if Bogart is stalking him.
The street tough stylish hooligan frightens me into self-awareness. My fingers strike like lightning on the Bakelite keys, each button a miniature black dart board. The resultant thunder drowns out Jess Godwin. The typewriter’s oft-recurring high-pitched, crazy-loud “ding” is more than sufficient in its own right to spark the ire of the street tough stylish hooligan gangster.
“I followed you from the address on your check,” Bogart says.
“I'm sorry,” says the beachcomber he called Bozo. He wears white cargo shorts, sandals and a red t-shirt with a creative design on the front. Bozo is gripped by Fear and Surprise, flash-flooded, real emotions I capture with my trusty rusty, antique typewriter. It’s younger than a Daguerreotype camera but it’s older than the camera in the portrait studio at Sears. I’m just guessing. I haven’t actually been to the Sears portrait studio since Christmastime, 1988. The gangster hooligan street stylish tough is packing a piece inside his jacket, not far behind the hospital-corner-folded baby-blue hankie poking elegantly out of his breast pocket. I’m mortally afraid but not exactly selfish in bravely documenting these minutes. No one else will even take a cell phone picture. It must be eons ago we were veg’ing out behind laptops, sipping nonchalantly at coffee and riding around in cabs scented by Prada candy eau de parfum-wearing flappers rocking maraschino lip balm.
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I dare to lower the newspaper from my eyes because Ernest Hemingway could not have corresponded about the war without watching it. Bozo stands. He isn’t tall. Bogart hovers above him, especially when you pause to admire the really cool fedora that’s perched Humphrey Bogart-style on top of his head. Bozo reaches into a pocket of his cargo shorts. This is the end. I get goosebumps on my goosebumps. Jess Godwin’s music is replaced by “Dueling Banjos,” only with guns. Ducking behind my stainless steel typewriter isn’t an option. I’m paralyzed, like a deer frozen in headlights. I sit upright and close my eyes, predead, and pray that Bogart/Bozo make it quick. My life flashes in front of my eyes. It starts to flash again but I’ve already seen it once. I open my eyes. Bozo holds a thick wad of bills and begins to pay Bogart. I keep count. It’s a thousand...and ten dollars. I record this amount with my clunky old typewriter as Bogart walks out with the dough. I fill with adrenaline and laugh involuntarily like mad. I’m having a whale of a time at Starbucks doing nothing. My appreciation of life is immensely heightened by surviving this ordeal and drinking coffee. Mostly, it’s the coffee.
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Country Thunder Wisconsin country music fans who were eager to party with the biggest stars this summer at Country Thunder this past July had to think ahead this year in order to get a coveted spot inside the gates. The annual fourday country music festival in Twin Lakes was sold out six months in advance of its July 18-21 run. One of a large number of country festivals across Wisconsin each summer, Country Thunder has grown in recent years to draw fans from across the nation to camp out in Southeastern Wisconsin and see a lineup of some of the genre's biggest stars. . This year's festival headliners included Dierks Bentley, Keith Urban, Brad Paisley and Jake Owen. Those big names are just each night's closer, but there was no lack of who's who of established acts and rising newcomers, including Joe Nichols, Brett Eldredge, Little Big Town, Justin Moore, Chris Young, Lee Brice, Eden's Edge, Dustin Lynch, Phil Vassar and more. The event grounds also held a Bluegrass Stage, Great American Country Stage and nightly electronic and dance music alongside an assortment of vendors and rides.
Brett Eldredge,
Country Thunder 2014 scheduled in Twin Lakes, Wisconsin for July 2427 is sure to sell out in record time even without a ďŹ nal line up in place. You can reserve your tickets and campsites for next year now by visiting their website at www.wisconsin.countrythunder.com.
Joe Nichols
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Go to MODAILEYS.COM or MO DAILEY’S on FACEBOOK
6070 N. Northwest Hwy Next to Norwood Park Metra station and right on Northwest Hwy 773 -774-6121
PRIVATE PARTY ROOM
Private party room with 9 50” hdtv’s and custom food & drink packages available. Call Today
PATIO OPEN EVERY SATURDAY NIGHT! LIVE MUSIC NEW POOL TABLE... SIGN UP FOR A LEAGUE TODAY!
$2
BOTTLES THURSDAYS
All-U-Can-Eat Sunday Brunch
11am-2pm
SUNDAY FUNDAY $5 BLOODY MARY BAR & $10 MIX-N-MATCH DOMESTIC BUCKETS
GET IN ON THE ACTION!!! BAGS TOURNAMENT SUNDAY @ 7PM Drink Specials & Prizes for the winning team!!!
BEARS GAMES
Food & Drink Specials, Giveaways and .30 Cent Wings during every Bears Game
The “DOUBLE D”! Mo Dailey’s original DEEP FRIED BURGER!!!
BOOK REVIEW
Bestseller Challenges Thinking About the Future You know that kid who is fantastic with a joy stick and video game? Maybe he is just practicing skills for his future as a surgeon. Surgery could be done with a joystick. It could be done from a control room thousands of miles away. And the kid who plays video games might just grow up to be that surgeon behind the camera. Things are changing, and fast. Author Randy Gage shares his ideas about how things will change and how prosperity will be built in the future. Risky is the New Safe: The Rules Have Changed is a book designed to give businesspeople (or any person) some warnings and some hot tips about what is to come. Gage says fast changes in technology and economic upheaval are changing the game. Gage serves up the usual doom and gloom about the future, so common in books today: The Euro and precious metals will collapse along with oceanfront real estate. Social programs will expand, trapping vast number of people in ignorance and poverty. All this, he predicts, will cause economic collapse. But he is also optimistic, predicting that the rules will change and have changed. Does your kid really need an MBA? In the future, which Gage predicts is close; the average student will just pick a study niche: Game development or operating surgical equipment. In Gage's future, seeing the world differently is the key to wealth in a world of economic woes. A high school dropout, the self-made Gage has been dubbed "The Millionaire Messiah" because he believes you should be rich. Risky is the New Safe: The Rules Have Changed by Randy Gage, Wiley, $24.95 at bookstores, discounted online and available for Kindle and other readers. FACEBOOK.COM/WHATSUPXTRAMAGAZINE
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Kelly’s Pub
80 949 W. WEBSTER
773- 281- 0656
Celebrating
Years of serving beers
VISIT US AT KELLYSPUB.COM FOR UPCOMING EVENTS
Sunday: Monday: Tuesday: Wednesday:
$15 Miller Lite Buckets & $3 Lagunitas Draft $1 Coors Drafts - $1 Tacos $2 Bud & Bud Light Bottles - $1 Burgers
Thursday:
$8 Coors Light Pitchers + $5 3 Olive Vodka Bombs & $5 All Sandwiches $4 Goose Island Green Line Drafts $12 Coors Buckets
Friday: Saturday: 32 WHATS UP XTRA
$2 Off All Drafts
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