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We would like to thank all the readers of What’s Up Xtra Magazine for your continued support. The magazine was started over 8 years ago as a small local publication in Chicago and has grown throughout the area, surrounding suburbs , and now into Southern Wisconsin to be one of the most recognized comprehensive local bar directories of its kind. Our “grass root marketing” strategy has proven an effective tool for our publication and is designed to be used as a tool for our readers to plan where they will be spending their afternoons, evenings, and hard earned dollars. Magazines have maintained popularity with readers through the years and have proven that magazine advertising and readership will stand the test of time. We encourage our readers to support your communities and to patronize your local businesses!
TABLE OF CONTENTS 7 TOYS FOR TOTS PARTY 8 news of interest
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12 ASK THE WINO 14 LA LAS LOVE LETTERS 16 OUT AND ABOUT PHOTOS
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18 HOROSCOPE 19 bartender of the month 20 Sudoku and crossword puzzle
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Whose Clock? A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, “What are all those clocks?” St. Peter answered, “Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move.” “Oh,” said the man, “whose clock is that?”
indicating that she never told a lie.”
“That’s Mother Teresa’s. The hands have never moved,
“Incredible,” said the man. “That’s Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life,” St. Peter informed him. “Where’s Obama’s clock?” “His clock is in Jesus’s office. He’s using it as a ceiling fan.” FACEBOOK.COM/WHATSUPXTRAMAGAZINE
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News & Stuff
Samsung Introduces Its New Smartwatch
Technology and You: It's Game Time! Sony has set November 15 for the debut of its new PlayStation 4 videogame console. That's about the same time that rival Microsoft is expected to start selling the new Xbox One.
The PlayStation 4
Sony hasn't released a new game console since 2006 when it came out with PlayStation 3. Since then, it has sold 70 million units. The new console promises to have even more sales. It has had pre-orders for millions of units.
It’s been 40 years since comic book hero Dick Tracy used his watch as a two-way radio. All the kids wanted one. Now, you can have a watch that’s even better than Dick Tracy’s. Samsung’s new Galaxy Gear smartwatch ($299) was introduced recently, and other makers are working on one. Samsung’s watch has to be paired with its Galaxy Note 3 smartphone. When you sync Galaxy Gear with Note 3 (via low-energy Bluetooth), it responds to voice commands. You can make or answer calls, glance at texts, emails, and other alerts at your wrist. The Gear also doubles as a pedometer, stopwatch, timer and music player. If you walk away from the Note 3, the phone screen with automatically lock, then unlock when you get closer.
Some Companies Won't Hire Smokers A growing number of organizations refuse to hire people who smoke. They say smokers raise health insurance costs, and miss work more often. The U.S. smoking rate is about 20 percent, except for those 65 and older, who are half as likely to smoke. People looking for a job would be wise to quit before filling out an application, according to the AARP Bulletin.
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Sony is acquiring new technologies to help it stream games to handheld devices. At $399, the PlayStation 4 will cost $100 less than Microsoft's new offering. Sony is reducing the price of its PlayStation Vita handheld console to $199 from $249. It is also creating a streaming game service that does all the intricate computational work than beams the images over the Web to the console.
The Microsoft Xbox One Microsoft plans to launch its competing Xbox sometime in November. It will be its first new model since 2005 when it released the Xbox 360, which has sold more than 78 million units. Without new hardware, sales of all game consoles have fallen worldwide. Now Microsoft is emphasizing broader possibilities than game playing for the Xbox One. It has such features such as live television viewing and interactions with its Kinect motion controller. It can layer images from a server into images created by the video game console.
The Future of Video Game Consoles Analysts expect both consoles will sell strongly at first, but whether those devices, as well as Nintendo Wii U, released last year, can experience the same success over time as their predecessors remains unclear. As more people play free or inexpensive games on PCs and mobile devices, Sony, Microsoft and Nintendo are feeling more pressure to attract gamers to their products. WWW.WHATSUPXTRA.COM
Live Music Wednesdays New Orleans Beau and the Big Easy informal jazz, blues and motown show - NOV 6TH & 20TH
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3 KARAOKE Fri Stevie Starlite Nov 8 Sat Double D and the Sensations Nov 9 Fri Hot Rocks!!! Nov 15 Rolling Stones Tribute Alter Ego Sat Nov 16 Sun KARAOKE Nov 17 Rock Stetson Fri 22 Nov Sat Poison’d Crue Nov 23 Sun Nov
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One of our favorites returns “Black Wednesday”
The Neverly Brothers R&R Evolution from Elvis to The Beatles
Off The Record
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ALL MIXED UP by Lisa Romack
Pumpkin Pie
Ingredients 1 oz Malibu Rum ¾ oz Canned Pumpkin Pie Filling ½ oz Kahlua 2 oz Cold Milk Mix ingredients in blender with ice and blend thoroughly. Pour into graham cracker-rimmed highball glass and garnish with a sprinkle of cinnamon. FACEBOOK.COM/WHATSUPXTRAMAGAZINE
Thistle Cocktail
Ingredients 1 ½ oz Scotch 1 oz Sweet Vermouth Dashes Angostura Bitters Combine ingredients in a shaker filled with ice, shake and strain into a chilled martini or cocktail glass.
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Sparkling Rye Cocktail
Ingredients 1 oz Rye Whiskey ½ oz Red Grapefruit Juice ½ oz Simple Syrup Sparkling Wine Pour the rye, grapefruit juice and simple syrup into a shaker. Shake over ice and strain into a chilled champagne flute. Then pour in chilled sparkling wine.
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The Heated Boardroom On a tour of the facilities, the new CEO noticed a guy leaning against a wall. The room was full of workers and he wanted to let them know that he meant business. He stopped and in a stern voice asked the guy, “How much money do you make a week?” A little surprised, the young man looked at him and said, “I make about $400 a week. Why?” The CEO said, “Wait right here.” He walked back to his office, came back in two minutes and handed the guy $1,600 in cash and said, “Here's four weeks' pay. Now get out and don't come back!” Feeling pretty good about himself the CEO looked around the room and asked, “Does anyone want to tell me what that goofball did here?” From across the room a voice said, “That was the pizza delivery guy sir.”
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Ask The Wino… Taking questions
WINO: Junk Digler Likes: Roofs, High fives and Buffalo WIngs Dislikes: Roofs with leaks, wet shoes and dirty drawers
Jules, a Health Care worker asks: I’m a vegetarian and its not always easy to eat properly. I do choose this lifestyle. Why do people make fun of my choice?
WINO: What is wrong with you girl? Raw steak, crispy bacon I could go on and on. I’d rather nail my privates to a park bench with my flip flops
Jack, construction worker asks: Boxers or Briefs? I’ve heard briefs can cause damage if you know what I mean.
WINO: It don’t matter none, just make sure you change em often. Craziest thing my old dark and curly’s grown right through my drawers.
Terry, a teacher asks: I was thinking of getting some work done. Do you approve of plastic surgery?
WINO: My Old Lady Betsy needed some help. That old bag o bones looked like her breasts were running away from her face and don’t get me started on the back side.
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MONDAY Kitchen Hours 11am to $1.75 Domestic Pints 8pm Monday to Saturday with daily food TUESDAY specials $2 U Call Its WEDNESDAY FREE FOOD $2.25 Domestic Bottles DURING ALL BEARS GAMES THURSDAY “Like” us on Facebook $12 Domestic Buckets 9247 S Cicero Ave Oak Lawn (708) 636-1555 FRIDAY $1.75 MGD & PBR Pints SATURDAY $3 Premium Pints & Bottles SUNDAY $4 Bloody Marys & $12 Domestic Buckets
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La La’s Love Letters Dear La La, Six months ago I landed a good job at a small but lucrative firm. My boss, who’s the highest ranking person there, decided to stick me in his office just 2 feet away from him at all times. My boss is notoriously cheap and the word is that he doesn't want to pay to rent extra space. So what’s the problem? He is smoking hot and all I think about all day every day is where and how I might “do him” in our cozy little love nest. I wonder if he keeps me close for financial reasons or if there is by Lauren Strec a possibility he feels the same about me. Should I approach him about the way I feel and see if it is mutual or should I keep my secret fantasies to myself? Horny Helen Dear Horny, Change your panties, and keep that shit to yourself. If he doesn’t accept your “offer,” you could blow everything! Or at least make the close quarters even more awkward. You’re still a newbie at the firm, so before you make any moves, get some time under your belt: both in seniority at work, and getting to know him a little better. Find out why someone so handsome is such a tightwod, and [assumingly] single. Time can answer your question about his feelings towards you, without jeopardizing your good job. Dear LaLa, I was in a monogamous relationship with my girlfriend for two years. We split up and remained platonic friends. Months later, on a drunken night, we had sex. At that point, neither of us had slept with anyone else. After we had sex that night and the demon was released. I went on to sleep with three other women over the course of the next few months. Now my ex-girlfriend and I may get back together, and she has asked the question: Have I slept with anyone else? So far, I have managed to avoid answering her. We are currently sleeping together and I don’t want to jeopardize the possibility of a reunion. Do I have to tell her? Playing Pete Dear Pete, Women WILL investigate if we suspect something. With that said, you might as well just say it. Because there’s a strong chance that she will find out anyway, and when she discovers you lied… watch out. The potential argument you have now will be much more workable than a post-lie argument. Bite the bullet and say that there were three girls, you used a condom, and that they sucked in bed. Don’t be ashamed when you say it, and follow up that you haven’t slept with anyone since you and her started getting it on again. If she starts blowing up, keep your cool and DON’T apologize. Being ashamed or portraying that you’re guilty will create an atmosphere that you are wrong, she is right, and then she’ll have power to be upset. Tell her that it’s not fair to be punished for something that took place when no relationship or boundaries were established, and that you would appreciate if she thought about that. In the end, you want a girl that uses logic, so the result of this convo will either reveal someone you can keep, or someone you can keep… at arm’s length. Oh, and hey: she may admit that she slept with 3 guys, so be prepared to use some logic yourself if she drops that bomb.
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Dear LaLa, I need your help. I'm 35 and I believe I'm running out of time to get married and have a family. I have been with my girlfriend for 4 years. I like her and she is a beautiful person with a great career and dedicated to me. We live together and admire her deeply. However, I just recently met a girl that I had a sexual relationship with and she turns my stomach inside out and I can't stop thinking about her. This new girl told me to lose her phone because I was never going to break up with my girlfriend. What should I do? Break up or forget this girl ever happened and get married with my girlfriend or continue seeing her on the side and see where it goes? Confused Dear Confused, You’re not running out of time. And you’re definitely not ready for a relationship, let alone marriage. You “like” your girlfriend of 4 years? You “admire her deeply” enough to stick it to a side chick? You have to leave both of these women, and stop putting a deadline to settling down. 35 is not old, and there’s no doubt you need to grow up. There’s nothing wrong with “exploring” a few women, as long as you are a bachelor! What IS wrong, is being with more than one woman and holding both their hearts while you figure out what the hell you want. Break up with your girlfriend because she doesn’t do it for you, tuck away your boner for the side chick because she already knows you’re a cheater and will never trust you, and live it up as a single man until you find the woman that does everything for you, and just as important: you do everything for her. This may happen next year, or when you’re 50. Who cares? Just do it right. Dear LaLa, Today, my boyfriend left for Italy to play baseball for a semi-pro team. He will be staying there for a number of months and during this time, I will not be able to see him, and I'll rarely get to talk to him. He's the only guy I've ever loved, and I'm the only girl he's ever loved, so his leaving is extremely hard on both of us. I’m worried he will not be able to focus on his career because he will be so worried about what I am doing and missing me, so I was contemplating ending things. This way, he'd spend a couple weeks being sad, but he'd get over it, and concentrate on his future. I pray when it’s all over we are able to get back together and that we still feel the same about one another. Am I crazy to sacrifice my future to help him achieve his dream? Worried Wanda Dear Wanda, Long-distance relationships are not promising. I can understand your contemplation to just nip it in the butt and end it. But don’t. You’re always going to wonder if don’t at least give it a shot. I realize you won’t be able to communicate often, but if there is some point during the day, where you both have 10 minutes, even if you have to wake up at 3 in the morning, get on the webcam and just talk. Don’t put anything on hold, and see what happens. He will be busy with his work, and you should keep living your life as you would. If your love for each other withstands the time and distance, you really have something, and you’ll be glad that you stayed. And if it doesn’t work out, then you’ll never have to question, “what if.”
Lauren is a spokesmodel for tv, radio, live events, blogging and social media. Connect at Facebook. com/LaurenStrec for tidbits, news and fun photos
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802-804 Theodore St Crest Hill 815-726-3401 Facebook: www.facebook.com/BadaBrew Booking Information: Contact George 708-203-3809 / Sean 708-945-2282 / email: tsagaris@comcast.net DAILY SPECIALS
Sun: Free Pool, $3 Bloody Mary, $1.50 Domestic Pints, $4 Call Mixed Drinks - LIVE OPEN MIC Mon: Free Pool, $2 Corona, Dosxx, Modelo; $3 Patron, $3 Three Floyds Beer - NFL Gametime FREE BBQ Tues: Free Pool, $2 Domestic Bottles, $4 Tequila youcall-its, $3 Absolute Mixed Drinks & $0.25 Jumbo Hot Wings Wed: Free Pool, $1 Domestic Bottles, $2 well mixed, $4 bombs & $1 Tacos METAL WEDNESDAY w/ DJ Ricky Lancaster
Rockus, Oblivion Zero, Faded Ink, No Re Gretz Sat 11/2 - Red Poet, Saence, Adenine, Complex Project Wed 11/6 - A.D.D., Emphatic with special guests Fri 11/8 - Leviathan, Motorbiscuit, Man the Mighty, Like a Storm Sat 11/9 - Black Cat Manor, Blind Persuasion Thu 11/14 -Blue Felix with special guests Fri 11/15 - Iron Core Resistance with special guests Sat 11/16 - MAIDEN CHICAGO (Iron Maiden Tribute), HIGH SPEED DIRT (Megadeath Tribute) & POWER VIBE Sun 11/17-Blood of Maryters Mon 11/18 National Recording Artist Wayland with Royal Bliss & Motorbiscuit Fri 11/22 - Ah, Dark Passenger, False Rhetoric Sat 11/23 - Speedballl Zombie, Leyden Moon Sun 11/24 -Announting of the Sick, Flying Circus, Through These Eyes, Kalico Skies with special guests Wed 11/27 Broken Ego, UNDER D INFLUENCE, Plus 3 Fri 11/29 Rocking America showcase Sat 11/30Trainwreck with special guests
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The Hottest Place to party in the Joliet area is @ Bobby McGees! Bobby McGee's hosts the area's most energetic parties! So come one, come all and experience a true South Side Party Pub - at Bobby McGees at 1200 Cedarwood, Crest Hill 815-741-4318 FACEBOOK.COM/WHATSUPXTRAMAGAZINE
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LIVE MUSIC ON SATURDAYS 11/2 - BAD NOTES 11/9 - COMPLEX PROJECT 11/16 - AWESOME LOCAL MUSIC with ETLIN ZYLIN and 10 Bands! 11/23 - Gerry Sears (BeneďŹ t Show!) 12/7 - Jason Jackson and special guests 773.213.4597
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NOVEMBER HOROSCOPE ARIES: Take care to keep your temper in check. It's too easy for you to shake up people when you think you're just venting. It may be hard to relate to certain people now.
LIBRA: You are especially slick now. That could take you far as you grease the wheels of progress and smooth out relationships among co-workers.
TAURUS: You're having a sense of ownership over something that might not really be yours. Try to let it go as much as you can. It's a really good time for you to reconsider.
SCORPIO: The stars say there's nothing bad about being a Scorpio. You are determined and forceful while being emotional, intuitive, exciting, and magnetic. Wow.
GEMINI: You are beginning to feel a powerful romantic attraction. You could be entering a danger zone if it's for someone at work. Avoid flirting and walk away. CANCER: If your boss wants you to take on a significant project, but you aren't sure, take it anyway. Have faith in yourself. The boss is a good judge of your capabilities. LEO: Look beyond the obvious and you will be able to determine what isn't being said. In some situations there's more telling than what you can hear. VIRGO: November will be a lucky month for you. Partly because of work you've done already and partly because your potential is being recognized. You've created your luck.
Three Guys...
CAPRICORN: When you attend a big family Thanksgiving dinner, take your "live and let live" attitude with you. Some relatives are loving, but some are just aggravating. AQUARIUS: You're generally in control of your finances, but Christmas buying could trip you up. Don't let it happen this year. Plan now for what you can and will do. PISCES: It might feel like you're a fish out of water when it comes to the company Christmas party. It's coming up, so decide now to have a nice time. But be careful about what you will say and when.
Life is short, live it. Love is rare, grab it. Anger is bad, dump it. Fear is awful, face it. A memory is sweet, cherish it.
Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes in, staggers up to them, and points at the guy in the middle, shouting,
SAGITTARIUS: It's time to consider the status of your health, which you haven't done for a while. See a doctor for a checkup to determine what areas need more attention.
Unknown
"Your
mom's the best sex in town!" Everyone expects a fight, but the guy ignores him, so the drunk wanders off and bellies up to the bar at the far end. Ten minutes later, the drunk comes back, points at the same guy, and says, "I just did your mom, and it was sweet!" Again the guy refuses to take the bait, and the drunk goes back to the far end of the bar. Ten minutes later, he comes back and announces, "Your mom liked it!" Finally the guy stands up and shouts, "Go home, Dad, you're drunk!"
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Bartender: Josh Odyssey Sweet Spot 19110 S Oak Park Ave, Tinley Park
OCTOBER BARTENDER OF THE MONTH IS...
Signature Drink: Greek Long Island Ingredients: The original recipe blended! Words of Wisdom: “We never really grow up; we only learn how to act in public.”
Bartender: Kady Pockets Billiards (Doc’s Lounge) 13430 Cicero Ave, Crestwood Signature Drink: Rootbeer Float Ingredients: Baileys, Kahlua, Pinnacle Whipped, Jägermeister, Coke Words of Wisdom: “Laugh at your problems, everybody else does.”
CONGRATULATIONS
GINA
Bartender: Stef Hometown Tap 4068 Southwest Hwy, Hometown
Marty’s Place
Signature Drink: Sweet Sunset Ingredients: Malibu, Pineapple, Orange & Cranberry Juice Words of Wisdom: “It is what it is.”
2357 Plainfield Rd Crest Hill
Rules: All service employees are eligible to win. The service employee who receives the most votes in the month wins. You can submit your vote by texting (773) 288-9400 or go to facebook.com/whatsupxtramagazine “like” our page and vote under the bartender’s photo .
Only two votes are counted per person and voting polls close on November 20th. *The Pub Crawl will begin at the employee of the months bar and the limo bus will accommodate 24 passengers. Gratuity not included and must be paid prior to service FACEBOOK.COM/WHATSUPXTRAMAGAZINE
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SUDOKU
WORD SEARCH
SOME LIKE IT HOT
Rules: Every row, column and 3x3 box must have numbers 1 to 90
HOT STUFF HOT TUB HOT WATER HOT WIRE HOTBED HOTCAKE HOTFOOT HOTHEAD HOTHOUSE HOTLINE HOTPLATE HOTSHOT
HOT AIR HOT BLOODED HOT CHOCOLATE HOT CROSS BUN HOT DOG HOT FLASH HOT PANTS HOT ROD HOT SAUCE HOT SEAT HOT SPOT HOT SPRING
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THE LIGHTER SIDE
Borrow a Newspaper I was visiting my granddaughter last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper. "This is the 21st century," she said. "We don't buy newspapers. Here, use my iPad." I can tell you this. That fly never knew what hit him.
New Company Policy When the company president learned that his employees were tanking up on no-odor vodka during their lunch hours, he issued the following memo: To all employees: If you must drink during your lunch hours, please drink whiskey. It's better for our customers to know you're drunk than to think you're stupid.
Are You Smarter Than CHESTER “The Sock Monkey”? 1. Which President was the first to establish Thanksgiving as a legal national holiday to be held the 4th Thursday in November?
(a) Abraham Lincoln (b) Franklin D. Roosevelt (c) Thomas Jefferson (d) James Madison 2. In Canada, they celebrate Thanksgiving in what month? (a) November (b) October (c) September (d) May 3. The pilgrims took beer with them on their voyage. True or False?
4. Butterball says the best place to put the meat thermometer in the turkey is: (a) Breast (b) Thigh (c) Top of Leg (d) At an angle so it hits both the meat and stuffing 5. Every year the President of the US pardons a turkey and it goes to a public farm called Frying Pan Park, Herndon, VA. Which president is believed to be the first to pardon a turkey and start this annual tradition? (a) President Andrew Jackson (b) President Millard Fillmore (c) President Harry Truman (d) President Warren Harding
Want To Hear A Blond Joke?
6. Turkeys can drown if they look up in the rain. True or False?
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Want to hear a blonde joke?"
8. Plymouth Rock today is as big as: (a) The size of a car engine (b) The size of the nose on a face on Mt. Rushmore (c) The size of a regular mailbox
In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something. Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still want to tell that joke?" The blind guy replied, "Nah, not if I'm going to have to explain it five times."
Let’s Have A Son A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about having a son.
7. Back in the early 1600's, the pilgrims didn't have which of the following utensils to eat their Thanksgiving meal with? (a) Spoons (b) Forks (c) Knives
9. There were two ways to cook a turkey back in 1627. One was to roast it using strings and skewers and spinning it vertically. The other was done by using a "tin kitchen" which was set inside the hearth and allowed the turkey to be cooked on a spit and turned. But, the tin kitchen was only for the wealthier. It cost $3 back then. What was that equivalent to? (a) A day's pay (b) A week's pay (c) A month's pay 10. Why is Thanksgiving always observed on a Thursday? (a) The pilgrims felt it was sacrilegious to have a party on the holy Sabbath day (Sunday) (b) It took a lot of time and work to prepare all of this and by Thursday they were done and had to eat it all before things spoiled (c) The pilgrims went to church twice a week; Sundays and mid-prayer on Thursdays. They wanted to use the mid-prayer day as a day of thanksgiving
They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted. The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy. The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son. He was horrified at the ugliest child he had ever seen.
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6. True 7. Forks 8. The size of a car engine 9. A week’s pay 10. c
The wife smiled sweetly and replied, “No, not this time!”
Answers
1. Franklin D. Roosevelt 2. October 3. True 4. Thigh 5. President Harry Truman
He told his wife, “There's no way I can be the father of this baby. Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered! Have you been fooling around behind my back?'
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JFK - 50 Years Ago For Americans in their late 50s and older, the assassination of President John F. Kennedy was a watershed moment, a blip in time so shocking that everyone can say just where they were and what they were doing. The events of November 23, 1963 should be crystal clear for older adults, but it can hardly be forgotten by people of any age, given the dozens of movies and conspiracy theories. The assassination of President Kennedy occurred during an especially turbulent period in U.S. history. Externally, the nation was just recovering from 13 days of fear during the Cuban Missile Crisis in October 1962. School children practiced bomb drills in anticipation of an attack on the mainland. Parents wondered aloud what good bomb drills would do if a nuclear war ensued. People dug bomb shelters but life went on. Unfortunately for many people, life in the America during the 1960s and 1970s wasn't fair or free, and the great Civil Right Movement began. In an era when the nation moved from shock to shock, on that day in November, the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr., predicted his own assassination, "This is what is going to happen to me too." His words were quoted by Coretta, his wife, in books and magazines. Five years later in 1968, King's prediction came true in April. Later that year in June, Robert Kennedy was also assassinated. The Vietnam peace movement gained steam by 1965 and protests continued into the 1970s. The coming years will see many 50th anniversaries of the dramatic events of the 1960s, beginning with the assassination of President Kennedy.
Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal. Thomas Jefferson, principal author of the Declaration of Independence
Big Birthday Coming Up A guy goes in a bar and starts talking with the man sitting next to him. They drink for a while and after some conversation they find out one is rich, one is poor and they both have wives with a birthday coming up. The rich guy tells his new friend that he is getting his wife a beautiful diamond ring and a Ferrari for her birthday. The poor man asks, “Why in the hell would you get her both?” The rich guy replies, “That way if she does not like the ring she can drive the car the jewelry store to return the ring.” The poor man says, “Wow, I just got my wife a pair of flip flops and a dildo.” The rich confused asks, “Why would you get her that combination of gifts?” The poor man replied, “That way if she doesn't like the flip flops she can go screw herself!”
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C O C A P LU u G t P R & re do SU IZ DE B at or LE E S ee fo M S r r ac & G P h ar at in de io e ns s
IN
XER Game
BO
You haven’t boxed a Boxer till you’ve boxed...
THE GLOVE
For Fun For Tournaments
Bars and Event Coordinators call 773.213.4597
to order the Boxer at no cost & learn more about profit opportunities
New Machines: prizes paid out through the machine for top scores, wheel of fun,. and more... 24 WHATS UP XTRA
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live music
PSYCHO SISTER
by “Joliet” Dave
Shiver is the new release by Chicagoland based powerhouse Psycho Sister and judging by the their debut offering, this band has serious potential to be the next big breakout act from the area. From the opening salvos of the first track “Carnage” and continuing to the crunching finale “Dreams”, Shiver is an explosive heat-seeking missile of first-rate heavy rock. Rather than employ the mindless screaming and one-dimensional musicality that many metal bands embrace these days, Psycho Sister takes the creative high road and proves that melody and inspired writing do have a place in this genre. Lead vocalist Dawn Casey Perreault, guitarist Mark Perreault, bassist Jerome Allen and drummer Scott Turk Tyrcha Sr. are operating on all cylinders here both musically and dynamically. Dawns’ delivery is that of a sinister Grace Slick, draped in leather, powerful and ballsy. The guitars on this release are a cornucopia of tasty licks and hook laden riffs reminiscent of classic Judas Priest. Meanwhile, the rhythm section is a virtual thrill ride of pounding, crushing madness. Not to be left out, engineer Larry Kriz of LnL Recording does a magnificent job here, capturing the band as they were meant to be heard. While there is nothing that can be considered as “filler” on this album, standout tracks include “Carnage”, “Sorrow”, “Punchbox”, “Dreams of Fortune”, “Dirty” and the devilishly clever “Dead”. Shiver is best played in your car, windows down, riding the open highway with the volume set to kill. But however you choose to listen to this release, you will find your head banging, hands drumming and feet stomping. As exceptional as they are in the studio, bear in mind that Psycho Sister should also be on your short list of bands to catch live. In concert, Dawn commands the stage like a demented preacher in a tent show revival. The show is a perfect storm visually and sonically; Dawn and Mark are the lightning while Jerome and Scott provide the thunder. Shiver is available for purchase now at Amazon, iTunes and CD Universe among others. Links can be found at the bands website www.psychosisterband.com. You can also find the band at their Facebook page www.facebook.com/PsychoSisterSicMindMusic.
Psycho Sister will be performing Saturday November 9th at LIVE WIRE, 3394 N. Milwaukee Ave in Chicago and Saturday November 16th at PHYLLIS’S MUSICAL INN located at 1800 W Division, also in Chicago. Be sure to check out Joliet Dave at www.facebook.com/jolietdaveofficial
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SPECIALS: MONDAYS / TUESDAYS
$1.50 DOMESTIC PINTS WEDNESDAYS
.75 CENT DRAFTS (DOMESTIC) THURSDAYS
$2.00 BOTTLES (DOMESTIC) ASK ABOUT THE
$2.00 “SHOTS”
ALL DAY EVERY DAY - $11.00 BUCKETS ($10.00 ON THURSDAYS) / $13.00 IMPORT BUCKETS / BLUE MOON ON TAP $3.00 PINT FREE FOOD BEARS GAMES - PARTY ROOM AVAILABLE LIKE US ON FACEBOOK
.. . K C U L R U O TRY Y R FRIENDLY IN OU OSPHERE ATM
NOW OPEN @ 7AM FREE COFFEE & BREAKFAST BREADS... SERVED DAILY (7AM-10AM)
VIDEO GAMING/SLOTS 7AM TO 2AM DAILY
5805 W 87TH ST
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TA L E S F R O M T H E C H R I S
Summer of Fortitude By Rob Christiansen
Margaret caught me looking at her Department of Motor Vehicles letter, opened and lying on the table. She is six feet away, on the carpet, in front of the stairs. I feel mentally transported from her kitchen to I Don’t Nowhere even though I’ve been in a similar house 6,000 times. “Water, if you have it,” I mindlessly reply. Under the circumstances it’s hard to believe she offered me a beverage instead of a cigarette. Maybe she assumes, correctly, that I don’t smoke. “I don’t have Perrier, if that’s what you’re accustomed to,” she says humorously while stepping, bare feet inside soft, black slippers, onto the earth tones, asphalt-tiled floor. She takes a glass from a cupboard above her sink. She opens her freezer. She mauls the ice bin in the door. She drops ice in the glass. The sound throughout is thunderous. She runs the tap like Niagara Falls on the Canadian side. We were there when I was nine. It occurs to me that maybe Rick really can hear the ocean’s waves from his roof. Margaret hands me the glass and incidentally touches my finger. Mine presses the buzzer outside heaven… or hell. “You look hot,” she says even though she doesn’t hug me or say she’s lonely and wants a sweaty landscaper with b.o. That would soil her scarf. Maybe I look like someone who just mowed her lawn on a 90-degree day. “I see you’ve been catching up on your reading.” I chug the water, standing because I’m not offered a seat. Leonardo da Vinci painted a face and Margaret’s parents reproduced it. She has dimples resembling asterisks within lines resembling parentheses, and I try to read her. Her long, straight blond hair parts right of center on top of her head and is darker than blond up there. She had been wearing sunglasses for practical purposes behind the wheel of her VW when we met two days ago. Now it’s clear to see that her eyes are blue. They play lead in “A Smile” although her mouth aptly substitutes making her oval face an imperfect reproduction of the da Vinci masterpiece. “Margaret,” I say in two syllables, using her name as a shield though she doesn’t look dangerous. She wears the diaphanous yellow scarf, tied loosely, hanging to belt loops of green shorts. The scarf can’t hide the footprint of the American chicken on a black t-shirt and her car door isn’t available to conceal her slender legs. She is 5’6” and her legs are roughly half that but they’re smooth, not rough. Her shorts are not denim, unlike my blue pair. They can’t stay blue much longer! Crazy thought, crazy shorts, exaggeratedly fringed because that’s how they came out of the dryer once I’d cut them.
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“Yes?” she drawls like a teacher waiting to hear my excuse. “I wanted to address you by name so you’d know I remembered it.” I hand her the glass. It isn’t fair that I read Margaret’s damn DMV letter! Now there’s no proof I already knew her name. But I would have guessed she was younger than twenty six, and maybe I should tell her that. I’m sure you said ‘address’ me,” she says, refilling the glass. She hands it back. I KNOW I didn’t say “undress.” My fear of saying “undress” to Margaret is worse than my fear of mowing over a toad and there’s a shin guard for that. She’s got to be toying with me. Still, I should e-nun-ci-ate. I drink the water. “Are you a Mets fan?” I ask as a Long Islander would a potential friend. “Being from As-tor-i-a? Your previous ad-dress? Did you attend your prom? Did you go to the World’s Fair? Did you see The Beat-les at Shea Stadium?” The song “Rock the Boat” ends, and the same band plays on. I’m surprised because you only hear “Rock the Boat” on the radio. My mother plays the stereo or records—Frank Sinatra, Barbra Streisand, Andy Williams, Tom Jones, Engelbert Humperdinck, Herb Alpert & the Tijuana Brass, Sergio Mendez & Brazil 66, and et al—when the TV isn’t on or I’m not practicing piano. I’ve taken lessons since fourth grade. I practice only fifteen minutes a day now, much to her chagrin. At least Margaret isn’t old enough to be…. Margaret answers my questions in the affirmative and I’m transported again. This time it’s her description of her prom dress and reminiscences of her prom at Terrace on the Park, of her adventures at the New York World’s Fair in 1964 and 1965 with her family, and of her 1965 Beatles’ concert experience with friends, sitting in the first-base-side upper deck at Shea Stadium, that take me through “The Time Tunnel.” Margaret may have watched that show too when she was as old as I am now. “I saw the Mets in 62 B.S.—before Shea Stadium,” she says. I failed to sit down in our duck-duck-goose and can see the future: She pays me while showing me to the door. But I will see her again as surely as the grass will grow. “The Mets won last night!” I sputter. “You met someone last night?” She misunderstands me or pretends to for a second time. She’s either a real stickler for enunciation or she uses confusion as a conversation piece. “It’s nice in here,” I say like an inexperienced driver trying to shift gears. (My mother’s Toyota Celica was in the shop in April because of me.) I’m referring to the air conditioning, but in all fairness to Margaret the remark is vague. I pluck my cold, wet t-shirt at my racing heart as though pantomiming a charades clue. She doesn’t respond. I quit the charades. It’s time to break down and apologize for reading her DMV letter before I go.
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OPEN TIL 4 AM Full Service... Bar + Restaurant + Pizzeria
6301 W. 73RD ST. BEDFORD PARK 708.728.6500
OPEN 6AM - 4AM MON - FRI (FOOD SERVED)
BLACK WEDNESDAY
$3 WELL DRINKS - $3 BOMBS - $5 PATRON SHOTS $15 DOMESTIC BUCKETS $5 LONG ISLAND AND BLUE MTFK OPEN TIL 4AM
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Little
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’s Frank Little
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Little Frank’s FREE BUFFET EVERYDAY 4PM TO 6PM $1.50 Bud Bottles Pizzeria Monday: EVERYDAY OR NF OPE NCH LU
6355 W. 79th St Burbank
(708) 598-8660
Order By Fax: (708) 598-2158
Fast Delivery or Pick-Up Hours: Sun thru Thurs 11am - Mid Friday & Saturday 11am - 1:30am THE BEST PIZZA JUDGED BY THE CHICAGO TRIBUNE
BAR NOW OPEN AT 7AM MONDAY $1.50 BUD BOTTLES
THURSDAY $1.50 MILLER & OLD STYLE BOTTLES
Tuesday: Wednesday: Thursday: Friday: Saturday: Sunday:
BEARS GAMES
Happy Thanksgiving Stop in for our Black Wednesday and Thanksgiving Day Celebrations
$10 Domestic Buckets and FREE BUFFET @ HALFTIME*
jam night call for details STEVIE STARLITE NOV 2ND Kitchen Hours
During Regular Season Games and * with a 3 Drink Minimum Purchase
Sun - Thur 11am - Midnight Fri & Sat 11am - 1:30am
BUILD YOUR OWN BLOODY MARY ON SUNDAY 11AM - NOON
$3
LIME - A - RITA STRAW - BER - RITA
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$1.50 All Pints $3 UV Bombs $2 Bacardi Mixers $1.50 Miller and Old Style Bottles $2.50 Import Bottles $2 Smirnoff Mixers featuring Bloody Marys + $1.50 All Pints $10 Domestic Buckets, $2 Smirnoff Bloody Marys + .75 Cent Schnapps
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Business and Leadership Development SET YOUR OWN HOURS, MUST HAVE COMPUTER AND ENTREPRENEUR MINDSET Benefits:
• • • • •
Set your own days and hours to build your business Positive Team Environment and Culture Lifestyle enhancement product that helps peak experiences and memories Ongoing Support Commissions based on sales/efforts/results/etc.
We are looking to team up with people looking to make a difference. Must be passionate about helping people and has a burning desire to succeed.
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