The Atlin Whisper

“Never doubt that a small group of committed citizens can change the world.”

Margaret Mead

SKAGWAY STORY - PT. 1

‘This is the City. I Work Here. I’m a Musician.’

by Paul Lucas

“Ladies and Gentlemen, the stories you are about to hear are true. The names have not been changed - the perpetrators being guilty of all charges.”

“WE’VE GOT A FLOATER”

Early one summer morning, very early I suspect, as the crew hadn’t seen fit to retire from the previous evening’s frivolity, Scott Logan and his compadres found a moose. They didn’t know it was a moose at first. The light, even though it was indeed light at this hour in the land of the midnight sun, was low and the location of the animal was unusual – it was floating in Lynn Canal.

The opportunities seemed boundless. First thing, though, was to get Bloatwinkle (as he became known) out of that frigid water and onto dry land. And for that they needed a front end loader. Luckily, the Westmark hotel had one just up the street, so the lads decided to liberate it for a couple of hours - a move which was to get them into the most popular section of the local paper - the police blotter.

Countless able bodied men in the North can operate loaders, and if they can’t, they feel free to give it a try. Scotty, fortunately, knew what he was doing. He expertly scooped Bloatwinkle up, backed up the bank, turned 180 degrees, and starting heading up Broadway with the rest of the rag tag crew trotting along behind.

The question now, of course, was what to do with their prize. After many suggestions, the consensus was to prop him up against Missy’s car where he could greet the citizens of Skagway as they got up and out for their morning coffee.

The pose took some time. After some thought and experimentation, the final choice had him leaning with lazy grace against the side of the vehicle and gazing out over his domain - front legs crossed in a careless insouciance ... an Oscar Wilde meets Cat Ballou kind of thing.

Of course, once the citizens met him, there came a torrent of requests for his presence at various events – parties, bar mitzvas, meetings of mayor and council … you know … the regular stuff. He had quite the busy schedule did Bloatwinkle. For a while, anyway.

Fish and game eventually decreed the animal be returned from whence he came - a peculiar request, considering he had been found floating in the canal. Still, it was becoming increasingly clear that Bloatwinkle was approaching his ‘best before’ date, so it wasn’t altogether a bad thing.

Off the boys went to get a loader, legally this time, to dump the carcass in the drink; the plan being to drop him off the dock with several concrete blocks attached to insure he stayed at the bottom. But the best laid plans …

The Bloatster seemed entirely unwilling to give up his celebrity status. His gaseous state caused him to rise despite the weight, and that big old head of his started bobbing around on the surface like a hard-on in a bathtub. And it was scaring the tourists.

Eventually, a diver had to go down and slit him up the middle - not his favourite gig I am guessing. After that, things settled down, and Bloatwinkle was allowed to disintegrate as nature intended, in the briny deep.

Bloatwinkle’s skull can now be seen hanging on the wall of the Red Onion. His fame assured, he could have avoided that whole unseemly bobbing business. If he had only known. It’s a lesson for us all.

To Be Continued

June/July Summary

Musicians

SaturdayJune17

Lorène Charmetant & Daniel Janke

Piano/Vocals https://lorenecharmetant.com

WednesdayJune28

SaturdayJuly1

Anne Lindsay Hayley Warden

Violin Candle Lit Piano Concert https://www.anne-lindsay.com https://www.facebook.com/ TheHayleyWardenExperience

July7– 8 The Atlin Band Hop Detailstobeannounced

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A Way With Words

I've started telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes. It's all about raisin awareness.

I've started investing in stocks: beef, vegetable, chicken. One day I hope to be a bouillianaire.

I accidentally rubbed ketchup in my eyes. Now I have Heinzsight.

Did you know muffins spelled backwards is what you do when you take them out of the oven.

I was walking in the jungle and saw a lizard on his hind legs telling jokes. I turned to a local tribal leader and said, "That lizard is really funny!" He replied, "That's not a lizard. He's a stand-up chameleon."

“Inner Strength”

(Waiting on your call to action)

There’s a braveness inside you willing to take on challenges and stand-up to be counted.

There’s a kindness inside you seeking ways to give of yourself for those in need or down on their luck.

There’s a wisdom inside you deciding which path forward will be the best choice.

Will today be the day you stand up tall for all to see your inner strength shine, as you answer the call to action.

Jeff Salmon