Shit I'm Afraid to Ask My Doctor: The Anal Edition

Most kids are taught that there are two things you never talk about at the dinner table: sex and butts, and certainly not sex involving anuses. However, we’re not children, and dinner’s over. It’s time to break the silence. We’ve all got rectums, don’t we?

According to PleasureMechanics.com, the external anal sphincter holds one of the highest concentrations of nerve endings in the human body, and anal penetration can stimulate the prostate or G-Spot. In other words, there’s something for everyone interested in exploring down there.

Bear in mind that, just like with condoms, no sexual activity is one-size-fits-all. Physical sensation varies from person to person, and no one is abnormal for having preferences. External and internal anal play can be a great way to have fun with yourself or a partner. You know the old college-try method—nothing is certain until you give it a go!

FAQs

What exactly is anal sex?

Anal sex, like other forms of intercourse, has both a traditional connotation and a fine print. The more “commonplace” definition involves a penis being inserted into a partner’s anus. Pretty straightforward, but in its simplicity this description neglects a world of potential pleasure. Fingers, hands, mouthparts, and sex toys all fall under the anal umbrella. If something’s not to your liking, there’s plenty of room for exploration.

Can pregnancy occur from anal sex?

In short, no, but unprotected anal sex runs the risk of semen spilling into the vagina, so some form of birth control is advised. While chances of pregnancy are slim, all sexual activities hold potential for health concerns, so keep reading.

Does anal pose any health risks?

Contrary to popular belief, when done correctly, anal sex should neither weaken your sphincter nor change your rectal structure. However, the rectal wall is thin and prone to micro-tears, which gives bacteria and viruses an all-inclusive pass into the bloodstream. Condoms are highly recommended to prevent against STIs. If that was not enough to convince you, condoms also combat friction, which reduces your chances of hemorrhoids and “rosebudding.” Otherwise known as rectal prolapse, this condition is when the colon loses its structural integrity and falls through the anus. That, of course, mandates a trip to the hospital.

Scary as these scenarios may sound, as long as you practice safe sex and communicate comfort levels with your partner, anal sex has virtually no side effects. Casualties are completely avoidable if everyone takes adequate steps to prepare.

Which brings us to the fun part:

Preparation Tips:

Confront the issue of the anus’s non-sexual functions. Both partners should be prepared to come into contact with trace amounts of fecal matter. That said, waste is stored in the colon, and the majority of anal penetration takes place in the rectum. If you listen to your body, you aren’t likely to end up with a mess on your hands, but experts on hygiene and common sense alike advise washing the area with soap and water first. If that doesn’t ease your nerves, you can use an enema to flush out the interior, but take caution in doing so. Anal douching can strip the protective mucous lining of your colon, so moderation is key here.

The insertive partner, just like any other hot date, should trim their nails before engaging in anal activity. This is not only for the receptive partner’s comfort, but also to prevent the spread of bacteria.

First and foremost, take some time for foreplay. The anal sphincter is a complex muscle that needs to relax before penetration, and skipping ahead can damage its integrity. It is recommended that beginners start with butt plugs or a finger (or two!) before moving on to larger objects.

While the popular idea is that the inserter is in control, a safer method is for the receptive partner to ease themselves onto the object of choice.

Lube is your best friend. While the anus bears many parallels to the vagina or mouth, self-lubrication is not one of them. Slather on that (water-based) jelly to your liking, and then it wouldn’t hurt to add a little more. Using lubricated protection can also ensure less friction, which ultimately makes for a safer ride. Planned Parenthood recommends using latex or female condoms, cutopen condoms, or dental dams. Lucky for us Victors, Wolverine Wellness offers all kinds of free contraceptives, so you can stock up on your next visit.

Remember when your parents told you never to wipe from back to front? Well, they’d tell you the same thing about sex. Colonic bacteria can hitch a ride on the penetrative object with the potential to cause UTIs, yeast infections, and worse. If switching from the anus to a mouth or vagina, it is important to clean the penetrative object in between, use a new condom, or at least remove the old one.

What to look out for:

Like any sexual activity, anal sex comes with risks and possible consequences. Light bleeding and mild discomfort aren’t unusual the first time you have anal intercourse, but if continuous, they may be signs of underlying colorectal issues. If the discomfort is keeping you from enjoying what’s happening, talk to your partner. Ask them to slow down, be gentler, or even change the activity altogether. Pain is a sign that something isn’t right, so pay attention to it (unless you’re into that stuff.) If anything feels out-of-the-ordinary, see your doctor. They don’t care if you’ve been bumping uglies; they just want you to be healthy and safe (and if you feel like your doctor isn’t being supportive or receptive, that’s not okay. This is another conversation altogether, but just be aware that a doctor should not make you feel bad for sexual activity).

In Conclusion:

The most important part of having a safe, enjoyable experience is full disclosure. Always discuss comfort levels with your partner. Anal might be a little awkward at first, but it should never be downright painful. Furthermore, pain is not the fault of the receptive partner; the insertive partner should match their actions to suit you, so let them know what feels good and what doesn’t. If they don’t cooperate, they aren’t worthy of your time. Remember that you deserve control over what happens to your body, and anyone who does not respect that is committing a crime. Armed with the facts, you will be able to make healthier decisions regarding your sex life. The bottom line: with open communication and a respectful partner, anal will have you feeling on top.

by Cielle Waters-Umfleet