Best Years Yet: March/April 2015 by Randy Hill

T H E P U B L I C AT I O N O F E XC E PT I O N A L L I V I N G F O R P E O P L E 5 0 A N D B E TT E R • W I L L A M E TT E VA L L E Y MARCH/APRIL 2015 / VOLUME 1 • ISSUE 6

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American Bookends: Oregon and Maine Page 6

2015: Dare to Dream Page 9

March/April 2015 • Best Years Yet

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Best Years Yet • March/April 2015

| FROM THE PUBLISHER |

Spring has sprung!

CONTENTS 4 - Down In The Valley 4 - Flashback 5 - Calendar 6 - American Bookends: Oregon and Maine 8 - Books/Music 9 - 2015: Dare to Dream 10 - Start. Do. Now. 11 - Aging Without Raging 12 - Musings From Apifera Farm 14 - Parting Shots

n early spring certainly caught us all off guard this year! Out of the ordinary sunshine and temperatures kick-started a lot of the trees and flowers into an early bloom. We’re not complaining. Lord knows we get more than our share of rain normally during this season, so a little break from it all might not be so bad. With the early arrival of spring comes the annual urge to get out and travel. Writer and photographer Ross Lewis has contributed a piece about our sister state to the far east, Maine. Certainly we’re miles apart in distance, but not so much maybe, in a lot of other ways. I think we’ve probably all had thoughts at one time or another, to ditch our day jobs and strike out on our own. Apparently it’s getting easier and easier to do just that. Steve Prager is your tour guide this month and shows how you just might be able to start your own online business. Katherine Dunn has contributed yet another magical story about life on Apifera Farm—and life stages in general (with a little guidance from crows and doves). Lee Coyne joins us for the first time with a poignant piece about life as a caregiver and the many challenges that life presents. And then finally, Brenda Dineen urges us to keep our dreams alive. Welcome to the latest issue of Best Years Yet. We hope you enjoy what we’ve put together for you and we hope you have a wonderful spring season.

On The Cover: Winter Harbor, Maine, by Ross Lewis.

PUBLISHER Randy Hill SENIOR EDITOR Erin Grace ART DIRECTION Hill Design Studios CONTRIBUTORS Lee Coyne, Brenda Dineen, Katherine Dunn, Ross Lewis, Steve Prager ADVERTISING SALES L. Andrew Brown/Concept Marketing Randy Hill PHONE 503.507.1228 MAILING ADDRESS P.O. Box 17264 Salem, Oregon 97305 EMAIL bestyearsyetpub@gmail.com WEBSITE TheBestYearsYet.com Best Years Yet is published bi-monthly. Opinions expressed in this magazine are those of the authors and not necessarily those of Best Years Yet. This publication cannot be reproduced in any form without written consent from Best Years Yet. Although we have made very effort to insure the accuracy of the information in this publication, due to the passage of time and the anomalies inherent in the publishing process, we cannot be responsible for errors or incorrect information. Please contact the individual establishments to confirm information.

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March/April 2015 • Best Years Yet

| DOWN IN THE VALLEY |

Our favorite time of year is when the tulips bloom!

“You don’t stop laughing when you grow old, you grow old when you stop laughing.” –George Bernard Shaw

Oregon Ag Fest: Touch, Taste and Experience Life on the Farm

lways the last weekend in April, Oregon Ag Fest is an activityﬁlled festival where kids (and grown ups too!) can touch, taste and experience life on the farm. Agriculture aﬀects us all, though many of us don’t know much more

he Wooden Shoe Tulip Fest is an invitation from our family to yours to enjoy all things that make spring in the Northwest. Stroll through 40 acres of stunning beauty, experience expansive views of vineyards, distant mountains, and a few mud puddles. Fresh flowers, food, and fun for the entire family! There is nothing like the colors of our tulip fields in the spring backed by Mt. Hood and surrounded by fresh country air. Every year the varieties are arranged differently in a

new pattern of color as we rotate our tulip ﬁelds to a new location. Bring your family (including the dog!) and enjoy 40 acres of tulips. Bring your own picnic lunch or purchase food onsite and make it a day-long event. Daily wine tasting available from our Wooden Shoe Vineyards, catch a bouncy ride on our famous cow trains, and so much more. Only 45 minutes from Portland and 30 minutes from Salem. woodenshoe.com

Flashback 

Bligh Theatre, Salem, Oregon “Frank Bligh, Owner and Manager of the Bligh Theatre, Salem, Oregon, and the Visual Evidence of His Exploitation Genius with “Robinson Crusoe.” Read more about the Bligh Theatre at salemhistory.net.

Best Years Yet • March/April 2015

than where to buy the products we need. At Ag Fest, learn where our food, horticulture and ﬁber comes from, how livestock is raised, the importance of forests for our ecology and survival, plus much more. Plant a seedling, ride a pony, watch chicks hatch, pet a rabbit, dig for potatoes and much more. Nearly 18,000 people attend Ag Fest each year to learn about Oregon’s largest industry. Come join us! oragfest.com

THINGS TO DO

IN MARCH & APRIL

MARCH Through May 31 - Highlights of the Jensen Arctic Collection. Journey into the unique cultures and ecosystems of the Arctic. Adopted in 2013 from Western Oregon University, the Jensen Collection represents one of the largest assemblages of Arctic material in the United States, and a valuable record of life in a rapidly changing region. 1680 E 15th Ave Eugene, OR 97403. (541) 345-3024 20-22 - Hot-rod show. See 400 outstanding cars, trucks, and motorcycles at the Portland Roadster Show at Portland Expo Center. portlandroadstershow.com 21/22 - Daffodil Drive & Festival Enjoy a day of family fun and cruise Ferguson Rd, 10 minutes west of Junction City, to view mile after country mile of golden daffodils. At the grange, enjoy monster cinnamon buns, wagon rides, hot coffee, kid’s art and of course, daffodil sales! See you there! 25855 Ferguson Rd Junction City, OR 97448. (541) 9985364. 22 - Albany Civic Theater “Much Ado About Nothing.” A hilarious farce filled with wry observations on love and relationships. This is the story of Beatrice and Benedict whose adversarial relationship creates intrigue among their friends and loved ones when they attempt to bring the two together. Set in the 1920�s it is a “Gatsbyesque” world filled with song, dance and

comedy. The local militia (Keystone Cops style) brings comic relief and moves the action forward. We have two young lovers, Hero and Claudio, who are caught up in a dastardly ruse created by Don John, but, all is well in the end and truly, “Much Ado About Nothing”. This is a classic guaranteed to entertain and amuse. Performances start at 7:30 p.m. for plays/special events and 8 p.m. for musicals, matinees (m), start at 2:30 p.m. albanycivic.org 24 - Tuesday Gallery Talk | “Roger Shimomura: An American Knockoff” Join docent Merrilee Zenone at the Hallie Ford Museum of Art for a guided tour of the exhibition “Roger Shimomura: An American Knockoff.” This event is free and open to the public. Tours will be held every Tuesday through Mar. 24, 2015. Tours commence in the Maribeth Collins Lobby at 12:30 p.m. Hallie Ford Museum of Art, 700 State Street, Salem 97301. 27/28 - Willamette Valley Wine & Jazz, A Festival in Historic Silverton. This two day festival features fantastic jazz music throughout Silverton and fine wines from East Valley Wineries. willamett evalleywineandjazz.com 28 - Marian Estates Easter Celebration. 10:00am. Rain or shine! For Children Ages 0-10. Over 4000 Eggs filled with Candy and Toys, Refreshments, A visit from the Easter Bunny, Photos only .50 390 SE Church St, Sublimity, OR 97385. marianestates.com

31 - Irish/Celtic Social Dance Lessons. 6:30 p.m. - 8:30 p.m. Weekly Irish & Celtic dance class. Lively Willamette Valley Wine & Jazz Fest forms of social March 27/28 dance similar to contra and square dancing. Great fun; excellent exercise; no partner or experience is necessary. Bring comfortable shoes and water. $5 per class.

Tuesdays, ongoing. FW Hall 630 Hood St. NE, Salem. 503-383-9297. ceiliofthevalley.org 31 - Wooden Shoe Tulip Festival. 12:00 a.m. Stroll, bounce, and photograph your way through acres of stunning beauty. Fresh flowers, daily wine tasting with estate grown wine, food and fun for the whole family to enjoy together. Check out the website for a complete list of daily and special weekend activities. 33814 S. Meridian Rd. Woodburn, OR 97071. woodenshoe.com

APRIL

Rober Shimomura: An American Kockoff March 24

Quilter, vendors, country store, raffle quilt, design-ablock. visitroseburg.com/event. 18 - Albany Saturday Farmers’ Market. Saturday, 9 a.m. -1 p.m, 4th & Ellsworth, City Hall parking lot, Albany, free, 541-740-1542, locallygrown.org, Items include baked goods, fruit, vegetables and flowers.

9-12 - Auto parts swap meet . Choose from 2 auto-parts swap meets this weekend. April 9 - 11 Portland International Raceway 17-19 - Portland Lindy Exchange. Automotive Swap Meet has 1500 Lindy hop dancers gather during vendors of automotive gear around Portland Lindy Exchange for dancing two miles of racetrack. April 10 - 12 to jazz and swing bands at venues Portland Swap Meet is all over the city. pdxlx.com billed as the largest on the West 24/26 - Astoria Coast, with Warrenton Crab, 3500 vendors Seafood & Wine inside and Festival. We invite outside you to join us at Daffodil Drive & Festival Portland March 21/22 the 33rd Annual Expo Center. Astoria Warrenton 11 - Oregon Scottish Heritage Festival. The Oregon Scottish Heritage Festival is designed for people of all ages, but especially for young families and youth who want to enjoy a day of good family fun, educational information, and insights into their own possible Celtic connections. 541-926-4314, oregonscottishsociety.com 10/12 - Umpqua Valley Quilters’ Guild 32nd Annual Quilt Show - “Earth, Wind And Flowers”. Judged and exhibited quilts, Featured Quilter and Honored

Crab, Seafood & Wine Festival to enjoy great coastal cuisine, arts and crafts, wine tasting and more! oldoregon.com/ news/2014/astoria-warrenton-crabseafood-and-wine-festival. 25/26 - Agricultural festival. Experience life on the farm. Plant a seedling, ride a pony, watch chicks hatch, pet a rabbit, or even dig for potatoes at Oregon Ag Fest at the Oregon State Fairgrounds in Salem. oragfest.com.

March/April 2015 • Best Years Yet

| PEOPLE |

  Sister states that bind America...Images that last a lifetime

PHOTO BY ROSS LEWIS

At that moment I had an idea that this state was very special. I was right! The visits and memories continued many times over. Standing on the perimeter of Crater Lake in the 70s; Ryan, my son,

Local talk, puzzles, cribbage and coﬀee. Moosabec Variety, Jonesport, Maine.

PHOTO BY ROSS LEWIS

Despite being separated by 3,700 miles, Oregon and Maine are the “book ends” of our country, the “sister states that bind America.” running with delight on the dunes when he was 4 years old in 1994; the unique, unforgettable Oregon Paciﬁc coast with its monolithic rocks standing as monuments in the sea; route 101; “Bandon-By-The Sea;” Florence; Coos Bay; Eugene; the Western sunsets; the town of Tillamook with the woman gazing out the window as we slowly drove by: all forever memories.

PHOTO BY ROSS LEWIS

Stockman’s Barber Shop, Ontario, Oregon

Best Years Yet • March/April 2015

PHOTO BY ROSS LEWIS

Fish Store, Portland, Maine

PHOTO BY ROSS LEWIS

eing a photographer accentuates the profound relationship you have with life. It is a privilege to see and experience countless things which, ordinarily, would go unnoticed. Photography is the vehicle for being intimate with it all. As a long time professional, I have had the opportunity to visit many countries around the globe, and my love for America is a great part of that photographic journey. Each region and state has a distinct personality, with many cultures and dramatically contrasting terrains. Yet there are also unmistakable similarities. Oregon on the West Coast and Maine on the East Coast are loving sisters. Despite being separated by 3,700 miles, Oregon and Maine are the “book ends” of our country, the “sister states that bind America.” My love for Oregon began in 1972 during a trip I took with an old Army friend, who I had served in Korea with in the late 60s. As we entered Brookings, the “Welcome” sign was curious and intriguing. “Please Visit Us…But Don’t Stay!”

Lobster trap buoys

“Our Daily Bread” Cafe, Veneta, Oregon

My “Oregon of the Atlantic”

The fabric of the people

Like Oregon, Maine has maintained much of its cherished, raw, uncompromised ﬂavor and character. The young Lewis family returned to Maine year after year in the 90s. Based out of our rented cabins in Trenton, and later in Calais, we drove for hours to see it all: the dramatic, crashing Atlantic waves in Acadia and the Schoodic peninsula; the lobstermen in Jonesport and Beals Island, where lobster have been harvested for generations; Eastport looking across to Campobello, where President Franklin D. Roosevelt relaxed; the town of Bath and its shipyard, in operation since 1884; Calais on the surging Bay of Fundy, with three border crossings into Canada; and the always-quiet village of Lubec, the easternmost point in the United States.

The intimacy of photography is the art of “getting close.” To accomplish this, you have to be both intrusive and “invisible.” With this in mind, it was incumbent upon me to be politely intrusive and, at times, daring: stopping on the roads; always turning back; never giving in to my fears or apprehensions; entering barber shops, restaurants, cafes and local town gathering places. People are not, in fact, uncomfortable with the camera when their natural relationship to intimacy occurs. On the contrary, people are naturally gracious and giving of themselves. To be true to Oregon and Maine, I was obliged to enter into the fabric of the people who have rooted themselves in these two states for many decades. The story of the “sister states” was not complete without getting close to the people.

PHOTO BY ROSS LEWIS

Blue Heron Bistro, Coos Bay, Oregon

Portland and Portland

It is often said that there are no coincidences in life. And so it goes with Portland and Portland: the two principal cities of the sister states that bind America. It’s no coincidence! Ross Lewis, born in New Jersey, is a 1965 graduate of Rutgers University. He was an Associate Director with WCBS-TV News, New York (1968-1978) following two years as an Army Lieutenant and serving in the 7th Infantry Division in Korea. Following his ten-year career with CBS television, Ross launched an international photography career which included his being the NFL’s

special assignment photographer. Between 1993-2010 Ross developed “SEE” (Special Eyes On The Environment), a leading specialeducation photography program throughout New Jersey for over 2,000 children and adults with multiple disabilities. In 2009 Ross was awarded as the “Public Citizen of the Year” by the New Jersey’s National Association of Social Workers. Today Ross’ FineArt photography can be seen and purchased through Ross-Lewis.artistwebsites. com.

Fine Art Photography Ross Lewis

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| BOOKS | First to Fly The Story of the Lafayette Escadrille, the American Heroes Who Flew For France in World War I By Charles Bracelen Flood Atlantic Monthly Press 978-0-8021-2365-7 • $25.00 • Forthcoming in Cloth • June 2015 Military History (World War I)

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Best Years Yet • March/April 2015

sponsorship of an expat American surgeon and millionaire William K. Vanderbilt, that the Lafayette Escadrille was formed in 1916 as the ﬁrst and only all-American squadron in the French Air Service. Flying rudimentary planes, with one-in-three odds of being killed, these fearless young men gathered reconnaissance and shot down enemy aircraft, participated in the Battle of Verdun, and faced oﬀ with the Red Baron, Manfred von Richthofen, dueling across the war-torn skies like modern knights on horseback. Drawing on rarely seen primary sources, Flood chronicles the startling success of that intrepid band, and gives a compelling look at the rise of aviation and a new era of warfare.

| MUSIC |

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f the Wright brothers’ 1903 flights in Kitty Hawk marked the birth of aviation, World War I can be called its violent adolescence—a brief but bloody era that completely changed the way planes were designed, fabricated, and flown. The war forged an industry that would redefine transportation and warfare for future generations. In First to Fly, lauded historian Charles Bracelen Flood tells the story of the men who were at the forefront of that revolution: the daredevil Americans of the Lafayette Escadrille, who flew in French planes, wore French uniforms, and showed the world an American brand of heroism before the United States entered the Great War. As citizens of a neutral nation from 1914 to early 1917, Americans were prohibited from serving in a foreign army, but many brave young souls soon made their way into European battle zones: as ambulance drivers, nurses, and, more dangerously, as soldiers in the French Foreign Legion. It was partly from the ranks of the latter group, and with the

ingo Starr’s 18th studio release, POSTCARDS FROM PARADISE (out March 31 through Universal Music Enterprises) is now available for pre-order. The solo album, with 11 original tracks, is the ﬁrst to include a song written and recorded by Ringo Starr and his current All Starr Band – Steve Lukather, Todd Rundgren, Gregg Rolie, Richard Page, Warren Ham and Gregg Bissonette. POSTCARDS FROM PARADISE was produced by Ringo and recorded at his home studio in Los Angeles and, as always, features friends and family. As Ringo often says, “If I am recording and you’re in town and drop by, you’re going to be on the

record!” The album’s guest artists include: Joe Walsh, Benmont Tench, Dave Stewart, Ann Marie Simpson, Richard Marx, Amy Keys, Peter Frampton, Nathan East, and Glen Ballard.

2015: Dare to Dream New opportunites and new possibili�es | BY BRENDA DINEEN

e are now in the beginning of our new year: 2015. Let’s welcome it and embrace its promise of new opportunities and new possibilities. Many of us like to set goals, to dream and envision what we want to create in the coming year. Now is a good time to do this. What are dreams? They are the active part of our wonderful imagination that we can ponder, follow and create. It is so important to have dreams, whether small or large. Our dreams pull us forward in life and give us inspiration to create, to build all things great and small. Recently I was travelling to downtown Vancouver, B.C. on the SkyTrain and there were five young men in their early 20s seated around me. All of them were glued to their electronic devices. I started talking to the young man seated next to me. He said he was from Turkey and didn’t like some aspects of Canadian culture. “I wouldn’t raise a child in Canada,” he said. “Why not?” I asked. “Because the coming generation is being ruined. Kids are being raised on electronic devices and in front of screens. In Turkey we have cell phones but we take them out only when we need to make a phone call. People don’t walk around staring at them.” Then he added, “My generation is lost. We don’t have any confidence in ourselves. We don’t know how to have a conversation together. We only text each other.” “What do you text about?” I asked. “We text about only a few things: where we are going, who we are going with, how much money we have, what we are going to buy.” I started feeling dismayed. I wondered, are all young people are like this? Then he said, “My generation doesn’t dream about the future. We only think about the present. We don’t think we have a great future.” I told him that he has a future. “You have the insight to see some problems. Listen to what you’re saying. You can start talking to others about these issues. You can make a difference. You can make a good future for yourself.” He brightened up a little and I wished him well as he and his friends got off at their stop.

It was very disheartening to hear that some young people lack confidence and don’t dare to dream about a bright future, or any future. I was fortunate to come of age in the 60s, a time of great social change and optimism about the future. Everyone had dreams and hopes for the future. Indeed, we struggled and campaigned for social change. The anti-war movement played a significant part in ending the war in Vietnam. The women’s movement spearheaded change in all areas of society. The sheer size and voices of these social movements gave us great confidence that we could create the world of our dreams. Baby Boomers are by nature are a very strong generation. We have always been on the leading edge, always creating change, and attached to our notions of youthfulness, optimism and our sense of what we can accomplish. We’ve always had confidence. Indeed, in the late 60s we thought we were going to change the world. When I was young, I had dreamed of becoming a teacher. I never wavered from my dream and in time it came true. After a number of years as a teacher, I was drawn to counseling and took a degree and other programs that enabled me to be a skilled counsellor. In life I’ve learned to have dreams, to follow the path I am guided on, and trust my intuition. What about you? Do you have dreams for this year? Have you written them out? Do you have a plan or a sense of how to manifest your dreams? Perhaps your dreams are for improved health, to learn something new, to help others in need, or to make a difference in your community. If you know of a young person like the man I met on the SkyTrain, talk to them, and encourage them to become something, to have dreams and make a difference in life. Above all else: hold onto your dreams. They create your life. Don’t let others discourage you. Surround yourself with people who support you in your dreams. I appeal to all people, young, old, middle aged: have dreams you believe in and hold fast to them! “You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” —C. S. Lewis

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| STOP. DO. NOW. |

This Year You Start Your Own Business Online! This column is all about finding the courage to put down the remote, get off the couch, dust off a dream or two and take action to make your bucket list a reality. Or as we like to say… Start. Do. Now. In this installment, we will explore a goal that is at the top of many bucket lists- Starting Your Own Business. It has never been easier to start your own business, and because of the explosion of the Internet and online shopping, the easiest business to start is your own Online business. With an online business, you can work as your schedule allows and there’s no expensive building rent or ornery employees to deal with. Your business is also scalable, which means it can be as big or little as you decide. And you may even be able to turn your hobby into a profitable online venture. In fact, there has never been more ways to make money, especially online, than ever in the history of commerce. The opportunities and options are seemingly endless. The problem is, with all the opportunities available, there is an accompanying chorus of marketers, gurus and pundits out there shouting at us from every direction. The resultant din is mind numbing. Maybe you heard your girlfriend has some business she works out of her home, making thousands of extra dollars a month working a few hours a day. She sells used clothes on eBay. It sounds greatwho couldn’t use some extra cash nowadays. But who can you trust to give you the right information? Your brother-in-law told you about some

MIKE LICHT

Time to put down the remote and take ac�on | BY STEVE PRAGER

With a physical store, your customer base is limited to who hears about you and walks in. With an online store on eBay or Amazon, you can literally sell to the entire world. course you can buy that teaches you everything you need to know, but it costs $700. What if it’s a scam? Who can you trust? Who can help you get started? And what if you don’t know much about computers? Enter Jill Fahnestock-Samp and her “Oregon eBay Etsy Amazon eCommerce Sellers Group.” This Meetup.com group is a mouthful of a moniker and the Willamette Valley’s answer to the Five W’s of online selling (Which? What?

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Best Years Yet • March/April 2015

Where? When? Why not?). Jill began her ecommerce support group and educational outreach in 2012. ”My passion is to take the mystery out of online selling and make it fun and profitable for my students,” Jill said. “With all the choices and selling options available, it’s important to get educated and have a group where you can share your successes and your flops. We meet once a month to learn about a new topic and I also host some fun field trips to local auctions and thrift stores. The group is open to everyone; beginners all the way to the seasoned pro.” Jill knows what she is talking about. She’s been selling online for years and is a former eBay certified instructor. She runs multiple online businesses and also teaches online selling at Chemeketa College. Her next classes, The ABCs of Amazon and Opening Your Etsy Shop, begin in April. “The world of online selling is a dynamic, ever changing marketplace and knowledge is key to being successful.” We caught up with Jill recently and asked her, ‘What is online selling about and how does anyone make money doing it?’ Jill began, “Online

selling is like having your own physical thrift shop or store, except you use an online platform like eBay, Etsy or Amazon.com to display and sell your goods. With a physical store, your customer base is limited to who hears about you and walks in. With an online store on eBay or Amazon, you can literally sell to the entire world. And to answer your second question, you can sell your goods for much more that you would in a brick and mortar store, and you have none of the hassle and expense of a physical store.” We asked Jill, ‘What you can sell online and where do you get the stuff to sell?’ “Stuff to resell online is everywhere,” Jill said. “We tell beginners to start with what they have laying around at home. A platform like Amazon.com makes it very easy to get started selling your own used goods online. After that, we teach people how to ‘source’ products from a variety of placesgarage sales, thrift stores, library sales or new retail items on the clearance shelves at the big box stores. The idea is always to buy low and sell much higher online. Each online platform we teach –eBay, Etsy or Amazon.com- they all specialize in certain types of product that sell best on their site (for an in-depth comparison of the major online selling sites, see the accompanying sidebar.) “The computers skills a person needs to get started is just the basic stuff,” Jill continued. “A person could get started in this business with a computer, a printer and $100 to invest. We teach you the rest, either through my Chemeketa classes or the free Salem eCommerce Sellers Group.” Jill can be reached through her website www.curiousdiscoveries. com or email her at jill@curiousdiscoveries.com. Steve Prager is a retired military musician and Postmaster who lives in an old cottage near downtown Salem. He stays busy collecting one syllable words, writing cheery obituaries, learning how to play jazz and trying new things.

| AGING WITHOUT RAGING |

Caregiver Challenges Create Chain Reaction Learning to cope with caregiving | BY LEE COYNE

INDEPENDENT LIVING is geared to the generally well elderly who tire easily and would enjoy having meals cooked for them daily so they do not need to cook themselves or wash the dishes. Weekly housekeeping is also included. Such sites are not for seniors needing ongoing health care services. ASSISTED LIVING is the bracket for those who face diﬃculties dressing, bathing and the like. These

To the outside world, the life of a caregiver seems like an abstraction. To those who’ve never stepped into the role, it could seem like a simple matter of shopping

—Handling bill payments, once her domain, was hard to master.

person and maybe cooking their meals.

—Cooking my own meals proved fun, but I gained excess weight.

I found it to be far

facilities can also help monitor medication intake if necessary, and offer special diets for residents with diabetes or heart disease, unlike in independent living homes. Advanced arthritis and strokes can be factors for placement in this type of facility. NURSING HOMES offer fullservice health care on a 24/7 basis. Frequently the individual has advanced dementia or total body weakness and must be assisted in following any routine. Their sense of time and place is fading. As my wife tried to live on her own, her memory lapses increased. She would often lose her key, misplace important mail, or get vital appointment dates mixed up. It fell on my shoulders to bring her to all medical visits and also to the bank. At times she was confused as to whether she had paid the rent. Then, in February 2014 she fell from her bed while reaching for a chair. Pain shot through her right arm as she crawled to the door seeking help. The staff responded and an ambulance brought her to the emergency room, where the doctor took x-rays and confirmed a dislocated elbow. He had a splint put on in the hope that it would begin to heal.

and she began to express feelings of abandonment. She now faced possible surgery for her injured elbow and wanted to move to an adult foster care home to get direct personal care. All of the above and more can be draining to the caregiver. Living alone, cooking your own meals, learning to figure out finances, and chauffeuring your spouse to half a dozen specialists brings on a sort of culture shock. I must confess that it took an emotional toll on me. —Running her sudden, last-minute errands left me chaotic.

for an ill or disabled

STEVE PERRIN

o the outside world, the life of a caregiver seems like an abstraction. To those who’ve never stepped into the role, it could seem like a simple matter of shopping for an ill or disabled person and maybe cooking their meals. I found it to be far more complicated. The downhill slide for my spouse began three years ago when she was diagnosed with Early Onset Diabetes, Type II. That frightened her. Before, she could eat whatever she wanted; now the doctor placed diet restrictions. She soon learned that all carb foods need to be monitored, not just sugars. High blood sugar levels stem from an excess of carbs which the human body converts to the sugar glucose. My wife found it scary to poke her ﬁnger with a needle to draw blood samples. Fortunately, she did not need insulin at this stage. However, she discovered that poor circulation comes with even early diabetes. During Salem’s rainy-chilly winters, her feet became ultra-cold. Even heavy socks couldn’t stop it. Next came evidence of weaker limbs. At age 70, this petite lady was leading younger peers on rural hikes. At 75, she impressed family and friends with her enthusiastic motion as she danced with me at a birthday celebration. But as she turned 77, she began to fade and no longer had the energy to regularly cook or clean. She decided to move into a local senior facility for independent living, where they cook you three meals and clean your room. Before I continue, let me explain the spectrum of facilities available, depending on the person’s physical state and ability to handle their own aﬀairs competently.

—My housekeeping skills were deﬁnitely in the lower bracket.

more complicated.

Months of physical therapy ensued—with me as the driver—but her pain level did not improve signiﬁcantly. Even getting out of bed was an ordeal. The doctor ordered a quad cane, which she found clumsy. Meanwhile, I sought in vain to get her to a neurologist to ﬁnd whether she had the early stages of dementia. Her counselor detected pervasive fear that interfered with her decision-making, and also found her “ambivalent” in planning her own future. As her health care power of attorney, I tried to be supportive, but she became resistant to all outside advice. At times, she seemed close to paranoia. After only a month at the senior home she had favored, she now resented it, claiming that almost all the residents were demented and not in a position to talk coherently. She implied being superior to her peers. Only after her fall did she say that her arrogance was a barrier to dealing with other people. After less than a year, she moved to a Portland facility where she felt that the population was “more diverse.” As an Asian, she had felt out of place at her previous facility. Then the managers in her new facility changed twice in several months

—The more I assisted, the less acknowledged she gave. —I sought an escape by buying surplus bric-a-brac. —Usually a sound sleeper, I began to sleep erratically. I’ve been asked how caregivers can better cope as the Baby Boomers come of age. We deﬁnitely must prepare for formal training classes in every senior center that exists. For working children, perhaps community colleges could sponsor such classes, starting in Fall 2015. This year marks the 50th anniversary of the Older Americans Act signed by President Lyndon B. Johnson in 1965, an ideal time to improve the process. We could also all beneﬁt from an acquaintance with the psychology of aging and loss. The role of caregiver is not a natural thing for most of us. Consider this a wakeup call.

B. Lee Coyne, MSW, is a longtime medical social worker and journalist who lives in West Salem. He also hosts a show on aging over KMUZ Radio each Monday at noon.

March/April 2015 • Best Years Yet

| MUSINGS FROM APIFERA FARM |

This is it—Being here now!

ack in my former city life in Minneapolis—which seems like a short time ago, but also a lifetime ago—I believed that crows brought me messages. I believed this with all my heart. At the time, I was seeking a lot of things: I wanted a mate, I wanted a sense of place, I wanted purpose and vibrancy in my daily steps. I wanted to feel secure. Like many seekers, I reached out to many false talkers who I hoped would give me quick answers and clues to get me on a track that was meant only for me. I read a lot of books (and I look back on some and realize how wobbly my land legs must have been to have read into such dogma). Still, it all got me moving in diﬀerent directions and made me seek my own answers, which is what it’s all about in the end. Through it all, I never stopped believing that crows were harbingers of important messages. At one time, when I was attached to a drowning man, dragging me along on the bottom of the sea, I believed that seeing two crows together meant that this man and I were still as one, still meant to be a couple. I would like to oﬃcially apologize to all crows. Two years ago, when my elderly mother died, a mourning dove began arriving and sitting nearby me for long periods of time. I had never witnessed a dove sitting for such long time spans, close and patient. I believed it was my mother. I still believe that. That dove stayed and would appear in the next few weeks when I needed it most. I’d come home up the drive and there she would be, sitting on the lower gate, waiting for me. I’d hear her cooing in the morning outside my window

“I sacrificed old familiar things I knew like the back of my hand: the old neighborhoods I’d grown up in, the stores and street scenes that held many memories and gave me a sense of knowing where I was. I gave up not needing a map to find anything.” and this helped me get up and carry on. Just about any dove I saw I took to be that dove, and believed it with all my heart. In time, I’d see the dove with another dove, and that became my parents, together, looking in on me before they ﬂew oﬀ to their

current realm. The fact that I really did believe this helped get me to this “place of sense” that we call Apifera Farm. I think to land in one’s path takes not so much believing in oneself as believing in crows bringing messages,

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Best Years Yet • March/April 2015

or doves becoming mothers. I had to unzip my body and step out of it in order to see the possibilities of what my life could really be. By finally taking the plunge and leaving my homeland in Minnesota, I sacrificed the things that brought me comfort: having my parents nearby, having all the wonderful friendships that took time to nurture into my middle years. I sacrificed old familiar things I knew like the back of my hand: the old neighborhoods I’d grown up in, the stores and street scenes that held many memories and gave me a sense of knowing where I was. I gave up not needing a map to find anything. I gave up a little house, and I let go of the trees that lived with it. But trees are a clan, a wise woman told me soon after. Where ever you go, the trees are connected to one another. Living on land engulfs a person in messages. One is acutely aware of harbingers of all seasons, storms, trouble and danger. The intuition we had when we once swam with dolphins is honed here on the land. I am still not as aware as the eagle overhead, but part of the reason I feel so “on my path” on the farm is that I am a crow, I am a dove, I am the land itself as I form a continuum from dirt to work boots to breath. And that dove is still my mother when I need it to be. I think that as I now enter my late fifties, I am arriving at a wonderful time of greater inner calm. There are many losses at this age: we fiftysomethings lose family and friends to old age and disease. It seems to be daily that we have to say goodbye, even if only to an old rock star we followed all these years. But we also let go of the rocks that weigh us down. There is much more a sense of “Wow! This is it; let’s be here now!”

Katherine Dunn is an artist, writer, and shepherdess living on Apifera Farm with her landscaper husband, lovingly known as The Dirt Farmer. Apifera is also home to many adopted elderly barn animals called The Misfits, which she writes about in short stories. Her art is showcased on Sundance, collected internationally and featured in her books. You can see her art, photography and books at katherinedunn.us and meet the many Misfits on her blog, apiferafarm.

Mature Living Choices

Community Name

Marian Estates Campus

Location

390 SE Church Street Sublimity, OR 97385 503.769.3499 1.800.440.2669 Call for a tour. MarianEstates.com

Dallas Retirement Village

377 NW Jasper St. Dallas, Oregon 97338 Phone: 503-623-5581 Fax: 503-623-2901 dallasretirementvillage.com

Buy-In, Monthly Rental #Units “No Buy-In” •Independent Living: Cottages, Garden Homes •Assisted Living •Nursing Care •Alzheimer’s & related disorders special care & rehabilitation available. Call for detailed information.

“No Buy-In” •Independent Living: Apartment, Townhome •Assisted Living •Nursing Care •Alzheimer’s & related disorders special care & rehabilitation available. Call for detailed information.

Ho us eke Tra epin g ns po rta Uti liti tion es Pla Inclu nn de d ed Me Activ mo itie ry s Ca re

Best Years Yet guide to Complete Retirement Communities

Amenities

Marian Estates is located on 38 beautiful acres in Sublimity, just minutes from Salem and offers Complete Retirement with No Buy In. Home cooked meals and choices are offered campus wide. There are no scheduled meal times in Independent living, dine at your leisure from a full menu or allow us to delivery to your home. Assisted Living and Nursing residents enjoy up to six different meals options for lunch and dinner. Other amenities include, full gym, walking paths, bank, beauty/barber shop, gift shop, party hall, pharmacy services and life enriching activities.

An immaculately kept 30 acre campus situated among rolling farmland, vineyards, and yet close to all the necessary amenities; all levels of care in a single beautiful setting: different styles of independent living, assisted living, memory care, and a renowned skilled nursing center with rehab & therapy; a full host of activities, wellness programs, and travel opportunities; soon launching our new “Lodge” community center and new Lodge residences.

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| PARTING SHOTS |

“Our neighborhood heron visits regularly, throughout the seasons. While he usually enjoys the water, he could only step gingerly on the ice when the pond froze last winter.” —Photo and text by Joy Massey

Best Years Yet • March/April 2015

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Best Years Yet • March/April 2015