37 06 willamette week, december 15, 2010 by Willamette Week Newspaper

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VOL 37/06 12.15.2010

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P h o t o : C h r i s R ya n / W o n d e r f u l M a c h i n e , I l l u s t r at i o n : A d a m K r u e g e r , P i e : W h i f f i e s

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Editor-in-Chief Mark Zusman EDITORIAL Managing News Editor Henry Stern Arts & Culture Editor Kelly Clarke Staff Writers Nigel Jaquiss, James Pitkin, Beth Slovic Copy Chief Kat Merck Copy Editors Matt Buckingham, Peggy Perdue, Sarah Smith Special Sections Editor Ben Waterhouse Screen Editor Aaron Mesh Music Editor Casey Jarman Assistant Music Editor Michael Mannheimer Editorial Interns Stacy Brownhill, Christina Cooke, Leighton Cosseboom, Rebecca Jacobson, Jessica Lutjemeyer CONTRIBUTORS Stage Ben Waterhouse Classical Brett Campbell Dance Heather Wisner Visual Arts Richard Speer

Our mission: Provide our audiences with an independent and irreverent understanding of how their worlds work so they can make a difference. Circulation: 80,000 Though Willamette Week is free, please take just one copy. Anyone removing papers in bulk from our distribution points will be prosecuted, as they say, to the full extent of the law. Willamette Week is published weekly by City of Roses Newspaper Company 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Main line phone: (503) 243-2122 fax: (503) 243-1115 Classifieds phone: (503) 223-1500 fax: (503) 223-0388 Willamette Week welcomes freelance submissions. Send material to either News Editor or Arts Editor. Manuscripts will be

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DUCK IT

Apparently you decided this was a slow news week; slow enough to take time off from serious journalism, as evidenced by your cover story on the University of Oregon’s football program [“Duck Tales,” WW, Dec. 8, 2010]. Please tell me why anyone with a genuine awareness of the world around them should care so deeply about the self-important, semi-pro, fully corrupt Ponzi scheme that is Division I college football. Lots of people—and they’re the lucky ones in this economic climate—struggle to pay their bills each month on far less than half of what Mr. Stern spent on his precious season tickets. And to top it off, I’m supposed to feel sorry for this fellow if/when Oregon wins all the marbles and he has—gasp!—nothing meaningful left to look forward to? My heart bleeds. If this was intended as satire, it is satire of the meanest sort. And if it’s simply marketing thinly disguised as journalism, it’s even worse. In the future, I respectfully suggest you and your staff stick to covering things that really matter and over which your reporting has the potential to effect positive change—and save the ad space for the outer columns where it belongs. Beth Hamon Northeast Saratoga Street

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

“Darn...so now I have to tell my 16-year-old son that he can’t obsess over the ducks. He’ll be bumming fo sho. Also, help me find the University of Blazers for all those blazermaniacs. Get over it...you’re just pissed no one likes your team.” —durhamduck

“Another typical bandwagon (albeit a longtime one) duck fan who never even attended LETTERS TO THE EDITOR must include the author’s street address and phone number for verification. Letters must be 250 or fewer words.

SUBMIT TO: 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Fax: (503) 243-1115 Email: mzusman@wweek.com

I’m broke, but I want a car. I’ve heard that you can get good deals at towing company auctions. Do you know anything about this? I would be interested in hearing more. —Ruby S.

little as $250, though not always without big transmission problems. You can see raw, uncaptioned photos on Speed’s website (speedstowingauction. com) to whet your appetite before the big day. Once at the auction, you’ll find that, um, you can’t really test-drive the cars. (Though they do start them up so you can listen for particularly egregious grinding noises.) The offerings are divided into “doesn’t run,” “runs with problems” and “runs and drives,” and, perhaps surprisingly, these designations tend to be accurate. Some of the best deals can be had near the day’s end, since a lot of folks have already bought their car and left. But beware of the creampuff with a preternaturally clean engine—likely, that’s one a used-car dealer couldn’t move. Listen well to my teachings, young Jedi, for verily, I have bought five cars this way. Did they last? Meh—for $600, who cares?

It’s said that somewhere, in a land beyond time, there’s a mystical realm where the rivers run with $600 cars, and a real man can jump-start a Honda Civic with his mind. Call me Ishmael. Many moons ago, a Yaqui shaman initiated me into the mysteries of the Speed’s Towing Auction. As a public service in these recessionary times, I’ll tell you what I know— though it may go hard with me once this gets out. The Speed’s auction is essentially the Happy Hunting Ground for every abandoned vehicle, unclaimed tow and OPB donation in the city. It’s held each Tuesday, and lies many days’ march toward the rising sun, out 148thand-NE-Sandy way. And, yes, you can find drivable cars here for as 4

“You don’t have to be a student or alum to be a true fan. I have bled green and yell-O for as long as I can remember. Like many other fans, I did not attend UO. I graduated from UNLV. While I am proud of my alma mater, the Rebels always come second to the Ducks. UO is part of the community. People love the University for what it provides us (education, research, entertainment, and a world-class athletic program). We are not ‘bandwagon’ fans. We celebrate when things are good and cry when things are bad. We are true fans that will always love the University.” —Josh

“The rules for the Jager circle, for the record: 1) No interlopers. Only folks who will predict an Oregon victory. 2) you have to take a pull greater than the 72-year-old mother of the hosts. Pretty simple and pretty awesome.” —PigDog

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the University of Oregon. I would understand this behavior (maybe) from an alumnus, but it just seems sick and twisted for someone who has no actual connection to the university. This behavior is typical of Oregon and USC fans. What’s wrong with these people?” —TVil

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Prominent Portland real-estate developer Homer Williams is being sued by one of the city’s premier law firms for $16,977 in alleged unpaid bills. As first reported on wweek.com, the lawsuit filed Dec. 10 in Multnomah County Circuit Court by the law firm Greene & Markley indicates Williams owes the money for work involving the IRS and the Oregon Department of Revenue. Greene & Markley is best known for bankruptcy cases, but online federal court records do not indicate Williams has filed for bankruptcy. Williams declined to comment. Gov.-elect John Kitzhaber requested state agency heads’ resignations last week with an eye toward rehiring only those eager to transform state government when he takes office next month. But Kitzhaber’s revamp ran into snags: Some agency directors report to commissions rather than the governor, and resignations submitted are deemed accepted within three days if they are not acted upon. Tom Imeson, Kitzhaber’s transition adviser, says the hiccups won’t be a problem. “The main point is to make sure the governor-elect and agency heads are on the same page,” Imeson says. Mayor Sam Adams last week introduced his plan for reconsidering Portland’s role in the FBI’s Joint Terrorism Task Force. Following the Nov. 26 arrest of Mohamed Mohamud for allegedly plotting to blow up Pioneer Courthouse Square, Portland’s 2005 decision to withdraw its police officers from the task force came under greater scrutiny. Commissioner Dan Saltzman, who opposed the withdrawal five years ago, called for an immediate return to the task force. But Adams advocates a slower reevaluation. Under the plan released Friday, Dec. 10, Adams doesn’t expect a public hearing on the topic until Feb. 24. The Lincoln High School football coach whose firing from the athletic department made headlines last fall continues to draw a $17-an-hour paycheck from Portland Public Schools. But he’s not currently working for the school district. Chad Carlson, whose alleged run-in with Portland Police on a MAX platform in August 2009 ended his five years as the high school’s head coach, left Lincoln altogether in 2010. He then took a job as a campus monitor at Cleveland High School for the current school year. But district records show Carlson has been on paid leave since Oct. 18. Carlson, who announced his intention to sue PPS as a result of the coaching kerfuffle, was not available for comment. Green giant gets some green: The Meyer Memorial Trust will give $250,000 to pay for a conference room and educational facilities in the proposed Oregon Sustainability Center (see “Green Giant,” WW, Nov. 24, 2010). Perhaps more importantly, at least three for-profit companies—including Skanska, the general contractor for the OSC—have expressed serious interest in leasing space within the 132,000-square-foot building that could break ground next summer.

NEWS

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CABLEGATE THOUGHTS ON WIKILEAKS? THESE OREGONIANS HAVE A FEW. BY JA M E S P I T K I N

jpitkin@wweek.com

The roiling crapstorm over the release by Wikileaks.org of classified State Department cables ratchets up another notch this week with the House Judiciary Committee convening to discuss legal strate-

gies against the website and its founder, Julian Assange. Already jailed in the U.K. while fighting extradition to Sweden on sex-abuse charges, Assange also stands accused in Congress by Sen. Joe Lieberman (I-Conn.) and others for alleged violations of the 1917 Espionage Act—a crime with a possible death sentence. Wikileaks has so far released 1,463 of more than 250,000 cables allegedly

obtained from Bradley Manning, a U.S. Army private. Manning is charged with unauthorized disclosure of classified information—leaks so far that include U.S. officials calling Russian President Dimitry Medvedev “Robin to Putin’s Batman” and Chinese officials cited as supporting a unified Korea. Supporters worldwide have leaped to Assange’s defense, and the imbroglio has proven red meat for Washington’s incoming Republican majority. In advance of the House Judiciary Committee’s meeting Dec. 16, U.S. Rep. Peter King (R-N.Y.) has already called on Wikileaks to be declared a terrorist group. With Congress set to consider action

during the final month the Capitol remains under Democrats’ control, we surveyed both senators and all five congressmen from Oregon about the possibility of criminal prosecutions of Manning and Assange. Democratic Rep. Earl Blumenauer and Republican Rep. Greg Walden, as well as Democratic Sens. Ron Wyden and Jeff Merkley, didn’t respond to multiple requests for comment. We also spoke with retired Air Force Gen. Merrill McPeak of Lake Oswego, Lewis & Clark international relations professor Cyrus Partovi and University of Oregon journalism professor Tom Bivins. —News intern Stacy Brownhill contributed to this story.

REP. DAVID WU (D)

REP. KURT SCHRADER (D)

REP. PETER DEFAZIO (D)

GEN. MERRILL MCPEAK

CYRUS PARTOVI

TOM BIVINS

Why he matters: A native of Taiwan, Wu has special interest in East Asia and human rights in China.

Why he matters: Hailing from the state’s rural-suburban 5th District, Schrader presents himself as a practical moderate rather than a woolly-haired Oregon liberal.

Why he matters: DeFazio sits on the Committee on Homeland Security. He’s also the only Oregon congressman mentioned in the cables so far—for a meeting with Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak.

Why he matters: A former chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, McPeak helped plan the first Gulf War and was a close advisor to Barack Obama during the 2008 campaign.

Why he matters: A former high-ranking official for the Shah of Iran, Partovi is a senior lecturer at Lewis & Clark College specializing in diplomacy and foreign policy.

Why he matters: A specialist in mass media ethics, Bivins is the head of the journalism department at the University of Oregon.

What he says: “In general I favor openness in government, so I would have to support this, but this is a particularly troublesome case. I don’t know how you conduct business in government if you can’t have confidential communication at the top. So if the idea is that nobody in government will ever be able to be frank with each other, then I think it’s a very bad thing.... We have to be able to have confidential communication inside our government. We just have to figure that out.”

What he says: “Wikileaks have jeopardized our conversations with other diplomats. Sure, 85 percent of the information published in the cable is already [general knowledge]. But it’s the other 15 percent that you keep for trust and rapport. It takes years to establish that kind of trust and confidence.... Someone dropped the ball. The bottom line is that this has not helped U.S. national interests.”

What he says: “The source[s] of the leaks—including the current prime suspect [Manning]—should be thoroughly investigated and prosecuted for violating the Uniform Code of Military Justice and other applicable federal laws.” But he adds publishing the cables did not overstep freedom of the press.

What he says: “Individuals found guilty of leaking classified documents should be prosecuted,” Schrader said. But, like Wu, he adds publishing the cables did not overstep freedom of the press.

What he says: “The government might have grounds to prosecute the leaker...for dereliction of duty. I am not a lawyer but do not believe they have grounds to prosecute media who publish the leaks.... These cables were sometimes candid and embarrassing but, from what I have seen so far, do not substantially threaten our national security. One has to wonder how incompetent our State Department and [Department of Defense] are to allow a [private in the Army] access to all this data.”

What he says: “I don’t call what Wikileaks is doing journalism. They’re mass-dumping thousands of pages of information. It’s kind of indiscriminate to just mass-release information without any thought to the harm that could be done.” But Bivins says prosecuting Assange would appear vindictive. “The government needs to put its own safeguards in place to prevent this kind of things from happening again.”

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Winford Parish never imagined his $1,800 in outstanding court debt to Washington County would land him in prison for two years. In 2007, a judge convicted the 39-yearold man of manufacturing marijuana. Judge Gayle Nachtigal gave him a second chance and suspended his 28-month sentence to five years’ probation. But on Oct. 25 of this year, sheriff ’s deputies hauled him into Judge Kirsten Thompson’s court for consistent failure to pay court-ordered financial obligations as part of his probation. When the unemployed father told Thompson he could not pay fines for things such as court-appointed attorney fees, prosecutor Jason Weiner told Parish he could have recycled soda cans for money. Parish is now in Coffee Creek Correctional Facility in Wilsonville. Some say Parish is an extreme example of a judicial practice in Oregon’s secondlargest county of leveling court fines and fees against homeless, unemployed and poor people—then incarcerating them when they don’t pay. “Court fees are crushing people who are already struggling in this economy,” says Dean Smith, Washington County office chief of the nonprofit Metropolitan Public Defenders. “People get on probation that have no hope of meeting the conditions.” If that all seems straight out of a 19thcentury debtor’s prison, there’s an Oct. 3 report by the American Civil Liberties Union that says such practices are increasingly common nationwide and that they violate the U.S. Constitution. “Day after day, indigent defendants are imprisoned for failing to pay legal debts they can never hope to manage,” according to the report “In for a Penny: The Rise of America’s New Debtor’s Prisons.” The report goes on to say jailing or

imprisoning debtors is often “illegal…and a fruitless effort to extract payments from defendants who may be homeless, unemployed or simply too poor to pay.” Statistics are unavailable on how many indigent Oregonians go to prison or jail for debt because record-keeping and judicial practices vary among the state’s 36 counties. But attorneys and defendants in Washington County describe a vicious cycle in which indigents who commit minor offenses, such as riding TriMet without a ticket, can pay up to $692 in fines and fees. Failure to pay on time means a court summons and more fees, and can even land someone in jail for up to 14 days. Such practices are practically unheard of elsewhere in the region, defense lawyers say. Rob Raschio is board president of the Oregon Criminal Defense Lawyers Association and practices criminal defense in places like Hood River County. He says most of the time judges there simply waived court fees for indigents. “We’re putting people in a situation where they have to ask [themselves], ‘Should I feed my family or pay my court fines?’” Raschio says. That’s the view of many Multnomah County defenders who don’t see their clients hauled in for debt because they say in most instances it’s hard to prove someone is willfully not paying a bill. “I’ve never heard of a probation violation based on court fines in Multnomah County,” says Kasia Rutledge, a public defender who’s worked in both Washington and Multnomah counties. “The judges here seem to know you can’t prove willful nonpayment.” Multnomah County Judge Leslie Roberts won’t go as far as to say Washington County is playing by different rules. But the judge admits feeling frustrated when her own probationers won’t pay their fines because they decide to pay fines in “another county” first for fear of jail. “That’s not helpful,” says Roberts. “The difference really shouldn’t be where the county lines are.” Nachtigal, who oversees Washington County’s criminal justice judges, doesn’t

R O B E R T D E L A H A N T Y. N E T

POOR HOUSE

NEWS

A FINE MESS: Bobbie Joe Johnson was jailed in Washington County because she was only $75 behind in court payments.

think the county violates the state Constitution’s ban on imprisoning debtors. “Their sentence is for not complying with the terms of their probation,” Nachtigal says. “I’m always concerned about the case and making sure we’re doing it right.... Do I sit there and say, ‘Is this debtor’s prison?’ I’m not sure that’s at the top of my list of concerns.’” “Part of it is a re-engineering of their thinking process,” she adds. “Part of is to say ‘This is life. We all have bills.” County Trial Court Administrator Richard Moellmer, who notifies judges when probationers owe payments, says, “The court is sensitive to the position that we don’t fill up the jails with people who just owe money.” But Moellmer admits the county issues debt warrants, in some cases blocking

people from completing probation because they still owe money. In the past year, the county issued 282 bench warrants to debtors whose probation was about to expire. The vast majority were between $200 and $500 behind in their payments. But defense lawyers say that number doesn’t give the full picture Bobbie Joe Johnson is a 24-year-old single mother of two who spent the night in jail Oct. 20 because she was $75 behind in payments stemming from a 2008 shoplifting conviction in Washington County. “I would have been in jail for nine nights if my boss hadn’t come and bailed me out,” says Johnson, a secretary at Portland Window and Gutter Cleaning. “They don’t care what your problems or struggles are,” she says. “This here is just money, money, money.”

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

POLITICS

M A R YA N N A H O G G AT T

NEWS

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goals and administrative rules and is not defensible as written.” Supporters of any growth boundary expansion must demonstrate an economic need for developable land. In Multnomah, Clackamas and Washington counties, Metro reviews the UGB every 10 years and prepares its own analysis of need. In smaller cities, such as Scappoose, the process is different. Rob Hallyburton of the Oregon Land Conservation and Development Commission says landowners, rather than the government, often prepare the rationale for UGB expansion in those cases. The owners of the acreage that compose most of the land proposed for expansion—Weston and BY N IGEL JAQU ISS njaquiss@wweek.com Ed Freeman—commissioned a $500,000 study of their property’s potential. A site controlled by one of Portland’s largest Nelson, of 1000 Friends, faulted virtually property owners is the source of a fight between every aspect of that report. a powerful state senator and one of her longtime She says the analysis grossly overestimates political allies. future employment growth in Scappoose, proOver the past two decades, Sen. Betsy John- jecting it will grow six times as fast as the rest of son (D-Scappoose) has deployed considerable the region annually for the next two decades. And financial and political capital to keep a 354-acre she says the report also understates the amount parcel of farmland about 19 miles west of Port- of developable land in neighboring cities. land from becoming a gravel mine. “There are many unrelated errors in the landHer opposition was instrumental in Glacier need calculations that combine to improperly Northwest’s 2009 sale of the Columbia County increase the land need,” Nelson writes. property to Joe Weston, Portland’s largest residenAlthough some local businesses support the tial property owner. expansion, dozens of residents Now, Johnson wants Scap- FACT: If the Scappoose City oppose it. “In many cases, the approves the UGB expanpoose to bring the parcel inside Council property becomes 10 times more sion, it must also get approval at the town’s urban growth boundary. the county and state level. valuable the day the expansion That change could provide owners ordinance becomes law,” wrote a windfall because it would allow the land, currently one of those opponents, former Scappoose planzoned “exclusive farm use,” to be developed for ning commissioner Lisa Smith. industrial use. After Glacier Northwest’s sale of the underlyJohnson testified in favor of the UGB expan- ing property to Weston and Freeman, the new sion at a Dec. 6 Scappoose City Council hearing, owners engaged in a long dalliance with the City just three days after the plan drew opposition of Portland, which was interested in building a from the land-use group 1000 Friends of Oregon. $120 million police training facility on the site. The irony is twofold for Johnson, whose power That Portland-focused project lost its biggest stems from her membership on the Legislature’s sponsor when Mayor Tom Potter left office in budget-writing Ways and Means Committee and 2009. Since then, Weston has been seeking an her control of a $10 million foundation that doles alternative use for the land located just east of out gifts to nonprofits across her district. Scappoose Airport. Johnson was 1000 Friends’ first paying memThe Scappoose Planning Commission greenber in 1974. More recently, she and 1000 Friends lighted his plans in October. The City Council has united to back landmark 2009 legislation pro- held one hearing on the proposal and will hold at tecting the Metolius River, a Central Oregon spot least one more, on Jan. 3, at the Scappoose High on which Johnson owns a home. School gym. But on Dec. 3, 1000 Friends savaged the ScapJohnson was unavailable for comment. poose UGB expansion Johnson supports. Freeman says 1000 Friends is merely taking a “The proposed [economic opportunity analy- “shotgun” approach. He adds Johnson, who has sis] contains numerous foundational errors and no financial stake in the project, supports UGB oversights, and would be an inaccurate basis for expansion for sound economic development reaplanning,” wrote 1000 Friends’ Mia Nelson. “The sons: “She and a multitude of others think this is EOA is inconsistent with statewide planning a better use than a rock mine.

A PROPERTY BRAWL PITS BETSY JOHNSON AND JOE WESTON AGAINST A POWERFUL LAND-USE WATCHDOG.

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EDUCATION

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Music Listings

PAGE 27 EASTERN PROMISES: Portland Public Schools has vowed to rebuild East Sylvan Middle School if voters approve a new bond.

TICKING TIME BOND IN THE RACE TO PASS A $548 MILLION CONSTRUCTION BOND, PORTLAND SCHOOLS FACE THREE EXPLOSIVE ISSUES. BY BE T H S LOV I C

bslovic@wweek.com

The campaign for Portland Public Schools’ $548 million construction bond officially kicked off Monday, when School Board members voted 7-0 to refer the money measure to voters in May. “This is a lot to ask, and we know this,” board member David Wynde told his colleagues Dec. 13. But, “our buildings and our students cannot wait,” added board member Pam Knowles. Three little-discussed factors have the potential to blow up as issues that shape the outcome of the election five months from now. 1) The last-minute inclusion of East Sylvan Middle School on the list of nine schools that would be rebuilt with money from the bond could generate a new groundswell of support. East Sylvan Middle School, home only to a sixthgrade class, sits in the Sylvan-Highlands neighborhood of Southwest Portland in Multnomah County. Technically, however, the school is part of the West Sylvan Middle School campus for the seventh and eighth grades—1.5 miles away in Washington County. Last month, when Superintendent Carole Smith gathered a roomful of local reporters to unveil her plan for the six-year construction bond, she never mentioned the words “East Sylvan.” Instead, Smith proposed rebuilding just Cleveland, Jefferson and Roosevelt high schools, plus Faubion, Laurelhurst, Rigler, Markham and Marysville primary schools. In addition to fully modernizing those schools, Smith proposed completing design work on a new Lincoln High School with money from the $548 million bond. At the time, the nod to Lincoln appeared designed to win support for the tax increase from deep-pocketed parents on Portland’s west side. (Markham, also on the west side, serves mostly lower-income families.)

Between Nov. 8, when Smith introduced the bond and Dec. 13, when the board approved the measure, district officials slipped the project to rebuild East Sylvan on the site of the West Sylvan campus into the $548 million bond without raising the price tag on the effort. “Is this just us throwing a bone to the Lincoln community?” Wynde asks. “My answer is no.” 2) Four members of the Portland School Board are up for re-election at the same time voters will consider the construction bond. Only one of those four School Board members, Bobbie Regan, has said she would run again. The other three—Dilafruz Williams, Ruth Adkins and David Wynde—have not said whether they will seek re-election. If they choose not to run, those vacancies could generate three hotly contested races. That, in turn, could open the door for disgruntled candidates angry about the current state of the school district. At a time when it will be hard enough to ask property owners to pay an average of $300 more on their annual property tax bills, those individual elections could prove a crippling distraction. In 2005, 12 candidates ran for three seats on the Portland School Board. One of those 12 candidates was Charles McGee, now executive director of the nonprofit Black Parent Initiative. He sees the potential for a positive impact from open seats in 2011. “It would give us the opportunity to have a substantial debate about where the district is headed,” he says, “and include new people in the conversation.” 3) In January, School Board members will consider whether to ask voters in May to renew a local-option levy that expires in 2012. That could overwhelm cash-strapped voters or appease parents worried about funding for programs. That local-option levy, first passed in 2006, now contributes about $40 million a year to the district’s $430 million general-fund budget. It largely supplements the budget for paying teachers. A decision about when to renew that levy remains uncertain. Many parents have told the School Board updated facilities will not satisfy them if the educational programs within those buildings crumble due to lack of funding. “It’s going to be a blood bath in Salem,” says Lainie Block Wilker, a parent in Northeast Portland. “We’re going to be talking about new buildings at the same time we’re talking about lopping off another week of school.”

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ROGUE OF THE WEEK

MIKE REESE

PORTLAND’S POLICE CHIEF USES THE PULPIT TO BULLY. We thought we’d heard it all after WW reported last month that Officer Leo Besner was up for promotion to sergeant (see Murmurs, Nov. 24, 2010). In his 16 years with the Police Bureau, Besner has cost the City of Portland more than $800,000 in lawsuits alleging brutality and other misconduct. Friends and family of a man Besner fatally shot in 2005 wrote letters to Police Chief Mike Reese opposing Besner’s promotion. Portland Copwatch and other activists jumped on board. Those critics followed proper channels to express valid concerns. But Reese responded last week by painting police watchdogs as a bunch of petty, implacable whiners—earning him a welldeserved demotion to Rogue of the Week. At a Dec. 9 ceremony promoting Besner and nine other cops, Reese closed his remarks by bringing up the Besner controversy. “There will always be ubiquitous critics who are never satisfied with our work or with the Police Bureau. Remember, they are not representative of the community,” Reese said. He concluded with what he called “a favorite passage by President Teddy Roosevelt that helps me keep my perspective”—from a speech Roosevelt gave at the Sorbonne after his presidency, in 1910. “It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena...if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat,” Roosevelt said 100 years ago. We understand the chief ’s need to keep up morale among the troops. But we’re talking about the sister of a man killed by Besner, and respected community members who have volunteered hundreds of hours to increasing police accountability. Calling them “ubiquitous critics” or “cold and timid souls” is tactless at best. “It is an insult to the citizens of this city who stand up and say something is not right,” says Rev. T. Allen Bethel, president of the Albina Ministerial Alliance, a coalition of African-American pastors pushing for reform in the Police Bureau. “As chief I continue to meet with and listen to our community partners,” Reese told WW by email. “I value their critical input, as I believe that this ongoing dialogue is one of the qualities that makes the Police Bureau an outstanding organization.” The next time Reese channels Roosevelt, we’d suggest a different quote: “Courtesy is as much a mark of a gentleman as courage.” Or better, one from long-dead British scholar Benjamin Whichcote: “None are so empty as those who are full of themselves.” Send Rogue of the Week nominations to hstern@wweek.com.

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RANDY LEONARD ISN’T THE ONLY PROBLEM FACING PORTLAND’S FOOD CARTS. BY AARO N M ES H

amesh@wweek.com

Gregg Abbott is perched over his Samsung Android at a wooden picnic table outside his Whiffies Fried Pies truck, parked in a vacant Southeast Hawthorne Boulevard lot called Cartopia. It’s a Monday morning—his day off—and Abbott is anxious to move under the heating lamps of nearby Tiny’s Coffee. He’s had his fill of sitting out in the cold. If food cart chefs are Portland’s new rock stars, then Abbott is Keith Richards. His rise is the stuff of local legend: In May 2009, he quit his job parking cars at RingSide Steakhouse to start deep-frying half-moon pies—filled with barbecued brisket and cheese, salmon and chipotle mayonnaise, or marionberry preserves—in a 1994 Wells Cargo trailer. That summer, the food cart lot Whiffies Fried Pies shared 14

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

with french-fry purveyor Potato Champion became a nightlife destination, as tipsy partygoers munched the perfect drunk food until 3 in the morning. Whiffies now serves a hundred customers a night. Its Twitter feed has 3,491 followers. Abbott has been filmed for segments on the Travel Channel and NBC Nightly News, and last month was asked by Gordon Ramsay to try out for the Fox cookingcompetition show MasterChef. But like many young rock stars, Abbott hasn’t seen the royalty checks. “If I really took the time to figure out how much I made per hour last year, I would for sure burn my cart to the ground and join an ashram in Northern California somewhere,” Abbott said. Plenty of cooks would love to take his place. Food carts have clustered at the edges of parking lots in Portland’s downtown for the better part of a decade. Thanks to government zoning laws less persnickety than those in other cities that require food trucks to drive home at the end of the day,

Portland’s theoretically mobile kitchens have paid rent to parking-lot owners to serve $6 pad Thai from permanently parked trailers—creating miniature dining districts on the sidewalk. But in the past two years—and especially this summer—the carts have spilled across the Willamette River, expanding eastward like a smallbusiness soufflé, or some kind of foodie Manifest Destiny. Carts with names like Starchy & Husk, Kim Jong Grillin’ and Crème de la Crème began serving macaroni and cheese, Korean barbecue and escargot from parking spaces in boutique cart pods— empty lots that might have been construction sites in a more robust economy. In the midst of a recession, new cart owners have created a shadow economy—one that’s young, hip and adored by the national media. The Multnomah County Health Department counts 609 food carts in the county as of Nov. 30—148 more than this time last year. In 2001 there were just 175.

C H R I S R YA N P H O T O . C O M

TROUBLE IN CARTOPIA: Customers wait outside the window of Whiffies Fried Pies.

Fifteen of the city’s 25 cart pods opened in 2010, 11 on the east side, says Brett Burmeister of Food Carts Portland, a website that covers the cart scene. An informal survey by WW last week shows that while most downtown carts are still owned by firstgeneration immigrants, less than 10 percent of the carts in eastside pods are. Two weeks ago, City Commissioner Randy Leonard took notice of the cart boom—and said some of it was illegal. Declaring that carts in two downtown pods had added decks and patios that “no longer make them food carts but illegal restaurants,” Leonard ordered inspectors at the city’s Bureau of Development Services to crack down on code violations. But Leonard’s attention isn’t the only trouble looming for food carts. Winter has arrived, and Abbott isn’t optimistic that the more than 600 carts will still be open in the spring. “There are a lot of factors right now that are going CONT. on page 16 Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

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Abbott says. “It’s my hope that the wave of people who are like, ‘This is an easy way to make a million dollars,’ is cresting. It might be over now. We’ll see how these things shake out, but starting a cart in December is a really, really tough way to get going. My guess is that by February there are going to be a lot of carts for sale on Craigslist.” Other food cart owners agree. After a summer of media love, they’re exhausted, jaded and not much wealthier than they were when they opened their windows. And they share the same worry: Maybe Portland’s cart craze has gone too far for its own good. “I think the cart thing got a little out of control, to be honest,” says Kevin Sandri, who runs the Garden State cart in the North Portland pod Mississippi Marketplace. “I think too many people came to the party. And somebody called the cops. Usually, somebody needs to call the cops.” Randy Leonard was driving into downtown off the Morrison Bridge STAY ON THE PORCH: Gharib Sameia built a wooden last month when he noticed El deck outside his downtown cart El Masry. Masry, an Egyptian food cart on the corner of Southwest 3rd Avenue and Washington ronmental Health Department inspections a Street. But it wasn’t owner Gharib Sameia’s kofta year, the same as traditional restaurants, but kebab that caught his eye. It was the deck. cart owners say those are the only government “I saw a guy out there building the biggest of officials they’ve seen at their door, apart from the structures, out there on the corner of 3rd and those ordering lunch. (Food carts have no higher Washington—up on the roof on a Sunday after- rate of food-poisoning complaints than tradinoon,” Leonard said. “And I thought to myself, tional restaurants, county health officials say. In ‘I’ll bet he’s doing that on a Sunday in order to the 2009 fiscal year, only two of 137 food-illness avoid running across any building inspectors.’ complaints in the county were against carts.) And it was within a week that Channel 2 was in The lax enforcement has been an open secret. [my office] saying, ‘Do you know about all these In August 2009, Mayor Sam Adams bragged to the Toronto Sun that Portland’s food cart wave had been aided “I DON’T SEE HOW [MY DECK] COULD BE by an absence of red tape. “We have worked really hard DANGEROUS. THIS WAS MY DREAM. I’M to stay the hell out of the way,” ASKING FOR THE CITY OF PORTLAND, Adams said. Leonard, a former firefighter, ESPECIALLY MR. RANDY, TO HELP US.” says he changed his tune —GHARIB SAMEIA, EL MASRY FOOD CART when he noticed the decks— constructed from cedar or pine structures?’ And I said to them, ‘You know, I and covered with tin or corrugated PVC roofing— actually saw a guy working on one of them on a jammed next to propane tanks. And he says he Sunday, and I have to say I wondered.’” took action only after vendors flouted his order Long before KATU’s report last month on last month to stop building. illegal decks, Leonard had been warned of pos“They had been given fair warning to do sible code violations at downtown carts. Last something about it, and their reaction was to November, he told WW that fire officials had build more structures,” he says. “I gave the percomplained to him about faulty wiring and pro- sonal warning myself.” pane tanks at two lots—on Southwest 3rd and Both parking lots are operated by Greg GoodWashington and Southwest 4th Avenue and Hall man—one of the city’s most powerful property Street—but he instructed them to concentrate owners and a personal friend of Leonard’s—who on more urgent violations. charges up to $500 a month in rent for each cart. “The running joke is that planners get upset (Goodman owns the 3rd and Washington lot; the about the carts [across from Development Ser- 4th and Hall lot is owned by the family of City vices], and then they walk across the street and Commissioner Dan Saltzman.) get a burrito and they are not upset anymore,” Leonard says if one of the wooden decks Leonard told WW last year. (The Leonard-man- caught fire, it would be more than a blaze. aged Bureau of Development Services sits across “If it would just be a bonfire, that would be from the cart lot on Southwest 4th and Hall— one thing,” he says. “But it would be a bonfire where the Taqueria la Nortenita caught fire and with rockets. Because those propane bottles are burned down in August 2009.) long and narrow, and when they catch on fire, For years, food cart owners have operated with they shoot off like a rocket. They’re more like a little interference from building-code inspectors. bomb. They would be very hazardous in fire conFood carts get two Multnomah County Envi- ditions. In other words, the Fire Bureau would

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

C H R I S R YA N P H O T O . C O M

CARTPOCALYPSE

C H R I S R YA N P H O T O . C O M

One they haven’t looked at yet is the Goodman-owned lot on Southwest 10th Avenue and Alder Street, where deck building is as rampant as on the cited lots. At least one cart has constructed permanent structures—a tin roof and a marble countertop—with holes cut out to accommodate existing trees. Sunny Souriyavong, who owns 10th and Alder cart Sawasdee Thai, says she built a $3,000 roofed deck in March after receiving permission from the lot manager. “I’m kind of scared,” she says. “I feel sad and terrible. It seems like, you put it up Monday, you have to take it down on Saturday.” Even as Leonard enforces the old rules, policymakers on multiple levels of government are promising new ones. The Oregon Department of Human Services is expected to meet with county officials in January to discuss updating policy to meet Food and Drug Administration food codes for mobile units. The Portland Fire Bureau says it is writing a new food cart policy as well, focusing on propane tanks, shock hazards and exits. Abbott, whose Whiffies truck is parked next to a tent strung with white light bulbs (both legal, if they’re up less than 180 days a year), says code enforcement is overdue. “Even the other food cart owners see that it can’t be an utter free-for-all,” Abbott says. “As cart owners, we should get together and have a serious dialogue about what is going to continue to let us have the sort of freedom that we’ve had, and not get somebody squashed by a falling structure.” Abbott obsesses over the minutiae of the food cart business. His Android has an RSS feed that tells him whenever a new Portland food cart appears on the Internet. He spends 30 minutes every day tracking the prices of food carts being resold on Craigslist. “Nobody spends more time thinking about this,” he says. Since April, Abbott has been scheduling monthly meetings with a small group of other cart owners, including Garden State’s Sandri and Potato Champion’s Mike McKinnon. Other owners in town sometimes refer to the group as the Food Cart Mafia. “It was clear from about a year ago this was coming,” Abbott says. “It was clear we might bump up against the Restaurant Association, it was clear that sooner or later the city had to enforce some of these code things. And with anything that gets popular, there are detractors that will find reasons to increase the cost of entry. Regulation is really about increasing the cost of entry so that it’s more difficult for people to get into these games. It’s super cool to be involved in a field where the cost of entry is low, and people get to bring out their wild ideas and take them for a spin without risk of ruining their lives. Increasing that cost of entry would bum me out.” The major regulatory cost of opening a food cart is a $340 annual Multnomah County Environmental Health Department fee—along with initial costs of a $290 plan review, a $100 business license and several

THAT’S NOT LEGAL EITHER: A tree grows through a food-cart counter on Southeast 10th and Alder.

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potentially have to back off and evacuate the whole area.” Leonard and BDS officials hosted a meeting with 75 cart owners last Wednesday, telling them they could either remove the decks by Jan. 3 or begin an extensive building-permit application process. For those permits to be approved, says BDS enforcement manager Mike Liefeld, “the code requires some kind of anchoring.” Goodman, who attended the meeting, told cart owners they would not be allowed to drill into his parking lots. “That’s going to be a problem,” Liefeld summarizes. Sameia, whose El Masry cart first caught Leonard’s eye, says he’s going to apply for a building permit anyway. His cedar deck cost $2,000 to $3,000 to erect, he says. It’s painted red, and decorated with Christmas lights and a tapestry featuring three camels. “They think it’s dangerous,” says Sameia as he dices cucumbers. “I don’t see how it could be dangerous. This was my dream. I’m asking for the City of Portland, especially Mr. Randy, to help us.” Sameia, who moved to Portland from Suez, Egypt, 22 years ago and opened his cart this spring after jobs at Nike and an auto dealership, says he didn’t check city code before building the deck. “I went to the parking-lot management and I asked if I needed to go to the city to get a permit,” he says. “They said, ‘No, you don’t need to.’ If it’s against the law, I don’t even want to step in it. But the manager said, ‘You’re fine.’” Goodman confirms to WW that he will not allow any drilling on his properties, and says his City Center Parking never received any design proposals for patios. “Did we know somebody was putting a porch in? Yeah,” Goodman says. “But we did not knowingly tell somebody to do something we thought was illegal.” While Liefeld says BDS will continue to investigate only the lots they receive formal complaints about, Leonard promises that he will send inspectors to all the cart lots in the city.

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CONT.

other small fees. Even though most of them are stationary, food carts don’t pay the city’s system development charges—infrastructure fees that can run well into the thousands of dollars. And that makes restaurant owners livid. “They’re not operating within the scope or intent of any of the laws,” says Bill Perry, director of government relations for the Oregon Restaurant Association. “These guys are not paying transportation development fees; they’re not paying sewer or water fees. What happens when a restaurant that’s right next door to them—say, a sub shop who had to pay all those fees—they open up a second unit and say, ‘I’m not going to pay the fees, because you’re not making them’? If they go try to enforce it…at some point, somebody’s going to have [grounds for] a lawsuit.” David Stokamer, owner of three FlavourSpot carts serving waffle sandwiches and coffee, says he doesn’t have time for a fight with restaurants—he’s busy trying to make a living. “I’m kind of wondering who’s going to have the time and wherewithal to fight this battle,” Stokamer says. “You know, the grass is always greener. Someone with a restaurant is looking out their window and they see all the food carts across the street, and there’s people standing there waiting for lunch—it’s like, ‘Oh man, I wish I was those guys.’ And this time of year, you’re sitting in your trailer and you’re freezing your ass off and you’re thinking about rent and it’s raining out and no one’s standing outside on line, and you’re looking at the guy across the street in the restaurant, saying, ‘Man, I sure wish I had a roof.’” While code enforcement and restaurant backlash are hot topics, most food cart owners say they have bigger fish to fry. Their most immediate problem? Winter is coming, customers are going, and the summer bubble of carts has left too many of them packed together in places where nobody’s walking by.

ESCARGOT CART: Bianca Benson has time to kill in her Crème de la Crème school bus.

mer, Benson says, she averaged sales of $800 a day. Now, she’s lucky to take in $800 a week. Benson says her lease continues until next July, and she’ll decide then if the bus is viable for a second year. (Making matters tougher, that $340 Health Department bill comes due in January.) She’s hoping the crowds gawking at Christmas displays on nearby Peacock Lane will stop by, and she’s selling handmade necklaces at the window for extra income. “I’ve started making jewelry to extend my lemonade stand,” she says. “I’ll seriously have to do some re-evaluating, and I think a lot of people will.” Matt Breslow, who runs the Grilled Cheese Grill out of two buses on Northeast Alberta Street and Southeast Ankeny Street, doesn’t think some carts will last that long. “A couple of my friends that I work with, we have [betting] pools to see, ‘You think they’ll make it to Thanksgiving?’” Breslow says. “’They made it to Thanksgiving. You think they’ll make it to Christmas?’ Some of them are still going. And frankly, some of them aren’t.” Abbott says the problem isn’t that Portland has too

C H R I S R YA N P H O T O . C O M

It’s “free cheese Friday” at Crème de la Crème—no additional charge for Gruyère, Brie or blue cheese on French dip sandwiches—but business is slow at the Good Food Here pod on Southeast 43rd Avenue and Belmont Street. Business is slow every day now. “It’s dropped off, I’d say, 700 percent or so,” says Bianca Benson from the kitchen of Crème de la Crème, a 1961 Ford B600 school bus she and her husband, Michael, renovated into a kitchen serving French specialties like croques-monsieur and escargot. “There’s days where we’re lucky to pull in $100.” Crème de la Crème was the first of 17 carts to open at the Good Food Here pod this past July. During the sum-

C H R I S R YA N P H O T O . C O M

CARTPOCALYPSE

ON THE ROAD AGAIN: Kevin Sandri plans to make his Garden State cart truly mobile. 18

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

many carts, but that the eastside pods were developed under the assumption that the more carts there are on a lot, the more rent gets paid to the property owner. “You can’t have 20 carts on a lot,” Abbott says. “Downtown you can, because you have 15,000 people walking past every day. But if you have 85 people walk past the cart pod every day, and 3,000 people drive past, how many of those people do you think you can get to stop and come in? And those developers develop those lots with the idea that they’re going to have 15 people paying the rent every month. “But if your business plan revolves around the fact that you have 15 carts,” Abbott continues—he’s building up steam now—“and you need 12 of those carts to pay the rent every month to keep the nut paid, and only five of them can be successful, then even those five of them are going to have to go find some other place. The basic underlying business plan doesn’t make sense.” Abbott has delivered this lecture before: He told it to the Vancouver, Wash.-based owners of Cartopia when they wanted to add more carts to the Hawthorne pod earlier this year. “We said, ‘For every cart that you put on this lot, you have to bring us another 150 people a day.’” Neeley Wells, who manages the Good Food Here pod for Urban Development Partners (monthly rent starts at $500), says the developers are still figuring out the ideal number of carts. “During the summer, [17] was a good number,” she says. “This is our second month of winter. We certainly wouldn’t throw in the towel. People love eating there— they just wish it didn’t rain so much in Oregon.” Yet new cart lots keep opening. A pod called Q-19, on the site of shuttered pool hall Cheers NW on the corner of Northwest 19th Avenue and Quimby Street, is seeking eight carts to sit outside a full bar in the building. Mississippi Marketplace owner Roger Goldengay has purchased a property in outer Southeast Portland on the Springwater Corridor Bike Trail. And this summer, real estate brokersturned-developers Michael, George and Nicholas Diamond tried to recruit 20 cart owners to an indoor food-cart palace in a building on Northwest 14th Avenue and Flanders Street in the Pearl District—a kind of artisanal food court. That project is now “on the fence,” Nicholas Diamond says. “When is the end of food carts going to be?” Stokamer asks. “The end of food carts is going to be when someone’s standing in a parking lot, in the freezing cold and rain, waiting 10 minutes for an $11 sandwich. And they just kind of say, ‘What the fuck am I doing here? How good could this sandwich possibly be?’” CONT. on page 20

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PIE IN THE SKY: Gregg Abbott (left) serves a Whiffies customer.

The summer cart bubble already shows signs of deflation. About 18 carts have closed or changed ownership this year, according to Food Carts Portland. Carts that opened in eastside pods are moving back downtown—there’s more regulation there, but also more foot traffic. “As many carts from the east side that can find a spot downtown, are going to find a spot downtown,” Abbott says. “And you’re seeing it already. Wet Hot Beef, Chili Pie Palace, the Frying Scotsman: All these guys that started out outside the downtown area are moving toward downtown.” Food cart owners are starting to consider contingency plans. The owners of East Burnside cart VolksWaffle shopped their Volkswagen Vanagon on Craigslist last month before deciding to concentrate on catering gigs. Sandri plans to start driving his Garden State cart to different locations each day—he thinks Portland’s days of stationary cart pods are numbered, and the food trucks will take to the roads, as they do in California and his native New Jersey. “You’re going to see things go truly mobile,” Sandri says. “That’s what I’m going to do this coming year. I’m going to start to phase the parked cart out. With the rules and regulations, honestly, I think some of the downtown carts are going to become a thing of the past, sadly enough. And I think the landlords on the east side, they’re going to perhaps start charging a little bit more, a little bit more, as there’s fewer legal lots. It’s going make it seem a little more realistic to open a brick-and-mortar [restaurant], because I don’t think the costs are going to be that different.” Abbott expects less-dedicated cart operators simply to quit. “I think you’re going to see some of these lots split into smaller lots, and some of these guys try their hand at a different hobby,” he says. “The people that are passionate about it are going to continue to do it for the crumbs. Because there’s nothing like being here at 2 o’clock in the morning and seeing 200 naked people riding bikes into your lot.” Abbott says he’ll stick it out. He’s added ice cream to his Whiffies menu. He isn’t trying out for the MasterChef appearance. (“I would make ice cream and pies until they figured out I was a one-trick pony and sent me home.”) Whiffies doesn’t pay him more per hour than parking cars did, but it’s his business. And Cartopia is his home. “I got into this game because I was bored, depressed and lost,” he says. “I needed some sort of community to be a part of. This lot became my whole community, even before I owned a cart here. I thought for sure this was the worst idea I ever had in my whole life, opening this food cart, and it was going to lead to financial ruin. But I was hoping that along the way I was going to meet some new friends. It was exactly what I needed.” News intern Rebecca Jacobson contributed to this story.

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BRINGING SEXY BACK: Turns out Oregon’s Pennie Lane isn’t the only world-famous band-worshipper in the Portland area. VH1’s new rockumentary, Let’s Spend the Night Together: Confessions of Rock’s Greatest Groupies, premieres Wednesday, Dec. 15, and features 59-year-old Michele Overman. She’s a Northwest Portlander who also happens to be the ex-girlfriend of Aerosmith’s Steven Tyler, Led Zeppelin’s Robert Plant and Pink Floyd’s David Gilmour. WW caught up with Overman to talk about how she once helped put the “sex” in “sex, drugs and rock ’n’ roll” (read a Q&A at wweek.com). She was only 16 when she dated Aerosmith’s frontman. “He was really cute and really charming,” she says of Tyler, who was over 18 at the time. “He’s one of those people who are so overthe-top talented with no brakes, no filter. You could tell he was MICHELE OVERMAN BACK IN THE DAY going places.” SOCIAL CLIMBERS: Take Portland’s claims to fame—most microbreweries within a city limits, most strip clubs per capita—and add another: Last weekend, the Circuit Bouldering Gym officially opened one of the—if not the—largest bouldering gyms in the world (gym owners aren’t too exact about calculating the area of their walls). Circuit Assistant Manager Quinn Dannies is excited about the extra-large, ropeless rockclimbing playground. “Even if I didn’t work here, this would be one of the coolest gyms I’ve ever seen,” she said. The location at 410 NE 17th Ave. is set in a 14,000-square-foot former car showroom. It features 17-foot boulders and three walls that top out, rather than requiring climbers to down-climb. “One of them [is] the size of an entire house,” says Dannies. HUNDREDS OF HOS: Chris Willis really, really digs Santa Claus. In fact, the Southwest Portland artist is so taken with St. Nick he’s collected 150 vintage light-up effigies of the jolly old elf; specifically, blow molds from Empire Plastics Corp., a “nowdefunct Tarboro, N.C.based company that produced the joyful figures from 1968 to 1985.” (He’s also got snowmen, angels, reindeer and elves.) Bask in the electric glow of his obsession this month at East Burnside’s bSide6 building, where his epic “Santa army” will be on display from 5 pm to midnight through Jan. 1. GIVE IT UP: Have you given your favorite local nonprofit some love yet this holiday season? WW’s Give!Guide wants to help you with that. Portlanders raised more than $900,000 for local nonprofits through the guide last year and have given nearly $400,000 so far this year since Nov. 17. Visit wweek.com/giveguide to get the scoop on 79 of our favorite worthy groups. Now go give your little heart out: The deadline for donations is midnight Friday, Dec. 31.

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WILLAMETTE WEEK

WHAT TO DO THIS WEEK IN ARTS & CULTURE

WEDNESDAY DEC. 15 [WORDS] BARRY GIFFORD, WILLY VLAUTIN AND JIM NISBET Wild at Heart scribe Barry Gifford shares dark Christmas stories alongside Willy Vlautin (Richmond Fontaine’s frontman, Portland horseracing aficionado and creator of the spoken-word CD A Jockey’s Christmas) and Jim Nisbet. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 228-4651. 7:30 pm. Free. All ages. [COMEDY] HARI KONDABOLU Kondabolu is laughing at your expense, white guy, and you’ll be laughing right along. Also, vegan jokes and record-snob jokes—it should be a very Portland kind of show. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., curiouscomedy.org. 8 pm. $10-$12.

THURSDAY DEC. 16 [SCREEN] TRON: LEGACY One night after hosting a Tron-Test at Ground Kontrol, Cort and Fatboy dove into the Disney computers and fished out Jeff Bridges to bring him back to the future, several hours early, in 3-D. The Roseway Theater, 7229 NE Sandy Blvd., 282-2898. 11:30 pm. $9. All ages. [COMEDY] LAUGHTERGLOW Standup from Seattle’s wonderfully acerbic Alysia Wood, plus Lisa Myers, Gabe Dinger, Christian Ricketts and Bri Pruett, hosted by Whitney Streed. Weird Bar, 3701 SE Division St., 236-8689. 9 pm. $5.

FRIDAY DEC. 17 [MUSIC] AGALLOCH Portland’s best black-metal band also happens to be one of the most famous in the whole word, and tonight the band gives its epic new album, Marrow of the Spirit, a rare live performance. Berbati’s Pan, 231 SW Ankeny St., 248-4579. 8 pm. $15 advance, $18 day of show. All ages.

SATURDAY DEC. 18

LAST CHRISTMAS PAXTON GATE KEEPS THE SEASON DARK.

Thanks to Paxton Gate, consider the naturalhistory enthusiast, Edward Gorey fan and edgy interior designer on your Christmas list checked off. The taxidermied bear cub in the front display window of North Mississippi’s newest curiosity shop isn’t for sale, but the spiny dried puffer fish, giant mounted insects and iron bird-claw lamps lining the moss-colored walls certainly are. Susan and Andy Brown opened the Portland version of their longtime friend Sean Quigley’s popular San Francisco-based “Martha Stewart meets David Lynch” shop earlier this month. They celebrate in appropriately dark fashion this Wednesday with live music from gypsy band

Vagabond Opera and free wine and eats set among the space’s collection of giant mounted animal heads and medical beakers; matchsticksized mink penis bones, glass wren eggs and tendrilly balls of resurrection ferns (“they die, they live, they keep coming back,” says Susan. “So, they’re perfect for Christmas...”)—many at surprisingly reasonable prices. Despite their penchant for dead things, the couple shrug when asked if they consider themselves macabre people in general. “Well, I did give him this as a wedding present,” Susan says, holding up a tiny mouse skull embedded in an acrylic block. “I made it in college.” Andy smiles and grabs the well-worn cube. “It’s my guardian mouse,” he says. Of course it is. KELLY CLARKE.

FIVE THINGS I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS FROM PAXTON GATE 1. Working model trebuchet. $45. 2. Taxidermied baby skunk. $420. 3. Owl pellets wrapped in gold or silver foil. $5.50 for pellets containing rodent bones, $12.50 for pellets with bird bits. 4. Knit frog or mouse dissection, with 100-percent-wool felted organs. $124. 5. Glass replica of human eyeball. $11. SHOP: Paxton Gate is located at 4204 N Mississippi Ave., 719-4508, paxtongatepdx.com. The shop hosts an opening party 8-10 pm Wednesday, Dec. 15. Free.

[LIVE RADIO] LIVE WIRE! Some of the sketches might be annoying, but tonight’s Live Wire! performance is worth the price of admission for Thao Nguyen’s spirited breakup songs and the chance to hear Carrie Brownstein make fun of your stupid dolphin tattoo. Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St., 719-6055. 7:30 pm. $20 general admission, $35 reserved seats. Minors welcome with a parent. [DANCE] BRAZILIAN CHRISTMAS DANCE PARTY You’d better be good, or Samba Claus will skip your favela this year. He’s one of the rumored guests appearing at the delightfully sweaty-sounding dance party. Shake off the chill with performances by the Lions of Batucada and others. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., 284-8686. 9 pm. $10-$12.

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DISH = WW Pick. Highly recommended. PRICES: $: Most entrees under $10. $$: $10-$20. $$$: $20-$30. $$$$: Above $30. Editor: KELLY CLARKE. Email: dish@wweek.com. See page 3 for submission instructions.

DISH EVENTS THIS WEEK Drink Deck PDX Launch Party

And now, for the most innovative way to gamble and booze this holiday season: Drink Deck PDX. The 52-card deck—which functions simultaneously as a bar guide, coupon book and deck of cards—makes its official debut this week. Each of the deck’s playing cards features a Portland watering hole and a coupon for $10 off its food and drinks. The Drink Deck official launch party will feature blackjack tables with the opportunity to win both drinks and decks. Order the decks for $29.99 apiece online at drinkdeck.bigcartel. com. CHRISTINA COOKE. Bar Bar, 3943 N Mississippi Blvd., 517-5751. 6-11 pm Thursday, Dec. 16.

Brewmaster’s Dinner at Aquariva

Portland’s Aquariva restaurant and

Eugene’s Ninkasi Brewing Company team up to offer a four-course meal paired with appropriate beers (a far cry from the pizza-and-PBR combo you might have had recently). Think Quantum Pale Ale with sweet-potato tortellini, tasso and roast apple; Tricerahops Double IPA with black cod, tangerine, brown butter and mustard greens; Unconventionale Imperial Stout with braised veal cheeks, caramelized shallots and artichokes; and something involving ale, chocolate, bananas and hazelnuts for dessert. CC. Aquariva, 0470 SW Hamilton Court, 802-5850. 6 pm Friday, Dec. 17. Reservations required. $40 per person.

Big-Ass Sandwiches Anniversary Bash A year ago, husband-and-wife team Brian and Lisa Wood slapped fries on giant sandwiches, gave them epic names like “The Gutbomb” and “The Pork Hammer” and started

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selling them out of a food cart at Southwest 3rd Avenue and Ash Street. The pair celebrates a year in business and a bunch of positive press (from the Cooking Channel, us and more) at the nearby Ash Street Saloon, with live local music from the Beautiful Mothers, the Stims, the Second Academy and My Life in Black & White. CC. Ash Street Saloon, 225 SW Ash St., 226-0430. 8 pm Saturday, Dec. 18. $5 at the door.

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Irving Street Booze and Brunch

Two Portland bartenders will wake up before noon (!) to share their knowledge of brunch cocktails. Irving Street Kitchen’s Brandon Wise (Eater Portland’s 2010 Shaker of the Year) will host Jacob Grier (of Bols Genever and Metrovino) in the first installment of Irving Street Kitchen’s three-part Booze and Brunch series (other classes Jan. 8 and 22). Chef Sarah Schafer will serve appetizers and select entrees from her new brunch menu as the ’tenders share the secrets of the Wassail Welcome Punch, New Orleans Fizz and Bols hot cocoa. Wear an ugly holiday sweater for extra points. Grier

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But it takes more than fresh veggies to make a killer slice, and Contadino’s crust, made from a Is anyone really entirely comfortable with the sourdough starter dating back to the 1890s, isn’t the idea of food cart pizza? It has so much working cracker-thin variation found in many woodfire eatagainst it: There’s no shortage of cheap, good eries—it’s the perfect balance of chewy and crispy, pizza in Portland to start with, so these carts doused with a bright, pepper-speckled sauce that’s don’t fill a void; plus, pizza is best enjoyed in a big both sweet like New York and chunky like Portland. warm pizzeria or, via delivery, in the comfort of The word “perfect” popping up in the previous your own home. How can this relationship pos- sentence is intentional. Pizza is as subjective a food sibly work out? as any—only Philly cheesesteaks are more divisive— And yet, at Pizza Contadino—a little yellow but I’m confident in suggesting that Contadino trailer on the east edge of a fledgling St. Johns serves one of the best slices you are going to find in cart pod—the marriage of pie and Portland. More impressively, it cart feels so, so right. Maybe that’s tastes like Portland. For all this Best bite: The rotating “fancy” because Contadino’s methodology meat and veggie slices. city’s fine pizza, few restaurants is so scattershot. There are staple make a pie that feels as if it were Cheapest bite: Breadsticks, slices like cheese and thick-cut you bum. born here. This city has high-end pepperoni, sure, but the rotating boutique restaurants that make “fancy” options are where Conpies fit for formal dinner parties, tadino’s magic happens. On one visit, the “fancy surprisingly hearty vegan pies with soy cheese and meat” option (cooked on site in about 10 minutes) gluten-free crust, and a half-dozen holes-in-the-wall included housemade sausage rich with fennel, that offer serviceable New York slices, but there are thick-cut mushrooms and stringy kale that tasted very few shops that taste like the Northwest I grew fresh and untreated—nothing here is oversalted or up in. Pizza Contadino does. And if I have to take a overcooked. That’s an aesthetic you notice before bus to St. Johns to feel like I’m eating Portland pizza, you even order—the cart’s hand-scrawled dry- so be it. CASEY JARMAN. erase-board menu and hanging baskets of veggies in its front window, not to mention the patchy- EAT: Pizza Contadino is located at the corner of North Richmond at North Lombard Street, bearded, Kerouacian figure behind the counter, 935-4375, pizzacontadino.blogspot.com. 1-11 pm are all giveaways. Tuesday-Saturday, 1-8 pm Sunday. $ Inexpensive.

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already has his picked out. CC. Irving Street Kitchen, 701 NW 13th Ave., 343-9440. Noon-2 pm Saturday, Dec. 18, Jan. 8 and 22. $40 per class or $100 for all three. Call Irving Street or email emily@irvingstreetkitchen.com for reservations.

Migration Brewing Holiday Ale Fest

If you’re feeling low on holiday beer, get to Migration for the Holiday Ale Fest. You’ll find winter ales from Migration, Three Creeks, Lucky Lab and Full Sail, as well as live music from local bands. Bring along canned food for the Oregon Food Bank (and entry in a raffle) and two 12- or one 22-ounce bottle of your favorite holiday beer, wrapped up to trade. CC. Migration Brewing Company, 2828 NE Glisan St., 753-7572. 7 pm Saturday, Dec. 18.

The Art of Food Writing With Diane Morgan

If you’ve ever wanted to get paid to eat (isn’t that the dream?), consider signing up for the Art of Food Writing, taught by nationally renowned food writer and cookbook author Diane Morgan. The course, which meets at Morgan’s home, will cover everything from how to write a recipe to develop book proposals and find an agent. Guest speakers will include magazine and newspaper food editors including Martha Holmberg. She teaches this course annually. 7-9 pm Thursdays, Jan. 13-Feb 17. Class size limit is 16. Register at dianemorgancooks.com, registration closes Monday, Dec. 20. $475.

DEVOUR

IMBUE VERMOUTH Most nights, you’ll find Portland bartender Neil Kopplin in a dapper suit vest and tie, serving up specialty cocktails to Portland’s pretty young things at celebrated downtown gastropub Clyde Common. B u t r e c e n t l y, h e ’s b e e n spending his nights at suburban supermarkets, trying to persuade housewives to sample a drink most people associate with their grandparents. This isn’t one of those recession sob stories. Kopplin’s peddling Imbue, his own brand of vermouth—an herbal-infused fortified wine best known for its minor role in martinis and, yes, as your granny’s favorite afterdinner tipple. But Kopplin is out to change Portlanders’ perception of vermouth—one shopper at a time. Imbue is a collaboration with longtime friends and winemakers Jennifer Kilfoil and Derek Einberger. Starting with a Willamette Valley pinot gris, Einberger and Kopplin then Neil Kopplin resurrects an barrel-aged some Oregon brandy old spirit. and embarked on the long trialand-error process of experimenting with dozens of different herbs and flavor combinations until they nailed their goal: “Make something delicious.” And make something delicious they have. The drink has a strong, tart punch at the back of the palate, but an overriding sweetness and wonderful spicy apple aroma that makes it easy to sip on its own. It’s vastly more flavorful than a dry vermouth, and infinitely more drinkable than a red—it’s a new style they’ve dubbed a “bittersweet vermouth.” In addition to many local bars and specialty stores, Imbue has been picked up by New Seasons, where Kopplin has been doing in-store demos to show regular folk that, as he puts it: “This is not your grandmother’s vermouth.” And it seems to be working, with 70 percent of the drink’s sales now coming from the retail market. “Getting people [used] to the idea vermouth can be drinkable is a large undertaking,” says Kopplin. “Most people’s reaction is, ‘Wow, that’s vermouth?!” RUTH BROWN. BUY: Buy Imbue at New Seasons and some local liquor stores; find more info at imbuecellars.com. Neil Kopplin will host a “locavore” Booze and Brunch class at Irving Street Kitchen with bartender Brandon Wise noon-2 pm Saturday, Jan. 22. Visit irvingstreetkitchen.com for reservations and info.

MUSIC

DEC. 15 - 21 PROFILE

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

SARAH JURADO

MUSIC

Prices listed are sometimes for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply. Addresses for local venues are listed in WW’s Clublist column, page 36, or online at blogs.wweek.com/music/clublist/ Editors: CASEY JARMAN, MICHAEL MANNHEIMER. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, enter show information at least two weeks in advance on the web at wweek.com/submitmusic. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: cjarman@wweek.com Fax: 243-1115.

WEDNESDAY, DEC. 15 Mistah Fab, Cool Nutz, Maniac Lok, Neema, Mikey Vegaz, Dubble 00, Mayo & eRok, Unique, DJ Fatboy

[HYPHY] It’s kind of hard to get you an all-encompassing overview of Mistah F.A.B.’s sound, because the Bay Area MC has like 30 albums and a million mixtapes—but suffice it to say that he is a hyphy disciple; a torchbearer for the minimalist neon party music that spent its 15 minutes on the popular radar before the more heavily funded jerkin’ “movement” displaced it. Hyphy lives on, though, as does the immensely popular F.A.B.. In a new era of MCing that relies more on infectious, heavily repeated one-liners than it does on honest lyricism, Mistah F.A.B. is a refreshingly technical rapper; one who’s not afraid to mix hood politics in with Thizzed-out, bass-heavy drinkin’/ druggin’ anthems. But he’s just as likely to engage in Too Short-esque songs about bitches and drive-bys—and really, what says Christmas like fucking and drive-bys!? Cool Nutz (a.k.a. Big Santa) has brought in a handful of his favorite local elves—I mean, local artists, to hold down opening duties. CASEY JARMAN. Ash Street Saloon. 9 pm. $12 advance, $14 day of show. 21+.

The Angry Orts, The Horde & the Harem, Buoy LaRue

The Angry Orts’ Sara Hernandez has one of those voices—sweeping, sharp and dire, like every turn of phrase could mean the end of the world. It’s the kind of voice that makes most female vocalists sound cutesy and inconsequential by comparison. Bold like Sleater-Kinney’s Corin Tucker without the vibrato, plus just a dash of cocksure Danzig. This is the voice that fuels the Angry Orts. The band, whose self-titled sophomore record dropped in August, is as versed in shiny math rock as it is in soulful pop. The Orts are one of the shining lights in Portland’s indie rock scene, and tonight’s headlining gig at Doug Fir is a reflection of their snowballing awesomeness. CASEY JARMAN. Doug Fir. 9 pm. $7. 21+.

Brothers Young, Neal Morgan, The Ocean Floor

Brownish Black, Iretsu, Sexo Tropico

[BASEMENT SOUL] Soul doesn’t come easy in the lily-white Northwest, but Portland’s Brownish Black delivers an astonishingly authentic brand of vintage rough-edged R&B. Anchored by the full-throated belting of singer Vicki Porter and M.D. Sharbatz’s rustystrings guitar tone, the band doesn’t try to mimic the polished majesty of ’60s Motown like a lot of today’s revivalists. (What unsigned act can afford to do so in this economy, anyway?) Instead, it works a sound more indebted to the grittier, more lowrent aesthetic of Stax/Volt and bluesindebted rock outfits like the Animals. The lo-fi quality of its demos work in the group’s favor, but a legit studio album—if one ever arrives—could be a sleeper hit. MATTHEW SINGER. Rotture. 9 pm. $5. 21+.

Sons of Huns, Fjord, Mouth

[RAW POWER] Along with their friends in Archers, local power trio Sons of Huns is among a handful of local bands that play raw, unfiltered rock ’n’ roll that harks back to a time before Pro Tools and iTunes. But while Archers uses elliptical guitar work and tricky time signatures to coat its pop songs, Sons of Huns goes straight for the jugular, relying on pummeling riffs and psych-rock grooves you can mosh and dance along to. The band’s debut EP is out soon on High Scores and Records, and I’m stoked to hear how Peter Hughes and Shoki Tanabe’s jams sound on record. MICHAEL MANNHEIMER. The Knife Shop. 9 pm. $4. 21+.

THURSDAY, DEC. 16 Buzzov*en, Rabbits, Witch Mountain, Stoneburner

[DIRT-KICKING ONCE MORE] With reunions of both high and low profile dominating the concert calendar in 2010, I don’t think we Portlanders really appreciate the fact that so many of these groups choose our city as a key stop on their tour itinerary. Case in point: sludge-metal pioneers Buzzov*en. This North Carolina

See Tuesday Neal Morgan listing. Mississippi Studios. 9 pm. $6. 21+.

CONT. on page 28

TOP FIVE REASONS TO BUY ANOTHER GRAY CHRISTMAS, VOL. 4 Because the money’s going to P:ear And P:ear is a really awesome local nonprofit that helps kids learn to believe in themselves (and maybe rock out a bit in the process). Because AndAndAnd is awesome The hotshit local buzz-band ends our compilation with a boozy Christmas story about walking home drunk from a bar. Love it. Because there’s a dog on the cover Bruce, namely. He’s Willamette Week’s mascot and a real cute dude. Because of the lyric “I was born on Christmas Day/ I don’t mind much/ It’s only mildly lame/ I was in a Christmas play/ Bathrobe and a towel/ I was allergic to hay” from Incredible Yacht Control’s “Allergic to Hay.” IYC frontman Bret Vogel is appearing at the disc’s release show, Dec. 22 at Mississippi Studios. Because it’s five bucks... ...for 12 great songs from local artists. It’s available now at anothergraychristmas.bandcamp.com, where you can listen to the whole thing.

WINNING STREAK DOLOREAN CHEERS UP (JUST A LITTLE). BY CASEY JA R MA N

cjarman@wweek.com

Al James doesn’t see himself as much of a singer— or much of a guitar player, for that matter. He’s just learned to work with what he has. “I just try to get the best musicians around me as possible, and I put my time into writing the words,” he says. Songwriting may be James’ greatest strength, but it’s hard to imagine Dolorean without his acoustic guitar as an anchor or without his singular voice—a charbroiled, low-register speak-sing that seems to squeeze out buckets of Oregon rain (and sometimes mud) with each verse. A rare Oregon native in a music scene dominated by imports, James straddles the same cultural divide as his friend, author and Richmond Fontaine frontman Willy Vlautin. James, 33, is a no-bullshit frontman who sings about horses and backroads; he was a kid who tried his hand at college athletics before falling fully in love with music. But he’s also a gifted, poetic lyricist who recently began a stint as a freelance copywriter for a local advertising firm. James can talk wine, and he had enough in the way of connections to persuade Portland director Gus Van Sant to shoot the cover of Dolorean’s last album, You Can’t Win. James is the archetypal local boy done good, whether folks back in Silverton recognize it or not. Dolorean’s music lives at that same intersection of high-concept and blue-collar. The band—keyboardist Jay Clarke, drummer Benny Nugent, bassist James Adair and lead guitarist Jon Neufeld—micromanages delicate arrangements (the strings and vocal harmonies on “Hard Working Dogs”) and shows incredible musical restraint (the almost reggae-ish “Black Hills Gold”) throughout its new album, The Unfazed. Yet, despite all this civility, they retain the swagger of a truckstop bar band in concert and even unleash a few full-fledged rock-outs on the new disc. “[The album] still seems pretty tame to me,” James says. “I still feel like we have a long way to go when it comes to capturing the way I hear it live...but we’ll get to that.” It’s not that The Unfazed is Dolorean’s best album to date—they’re all great. Dolorean’s recorded debut, 2003’s Not Exotic, presented a fully mature band and a well-developed songwriting force in James

(the haunting murder ballad “Hannibal, MO” is still a staple of James’ solo gigs—and one reason he doesn’t play very many weddings); subsequent albums Violence in the Snowy Fields (2004) and You Can’t Win (2007) stand just as easily on their own. But The Unfazed—despite the three years it took to complete—feels like a much more relaxed effort. James has long traded frighteningly specific and linear lyricism for more minimal poetry; it can take a few listens before the genius of a turn of phrase (“Waking up early ’cause I can’t sleep/ Getting’ wild on a bottle ’cause I don’t eat/ I have a habit of getting in a little too deep/ If I find love it’ll be the end of me”) sinks in. The music, too, is easier: Where You Can’t Win was almost oppressively restrained— brushes on the drums; gorgeous, hushed harmonies from Laura Gibson; single-instrument solos staggering along in single-file—The Unfazed wrestles between hauntingly sparse stretches and buzzing, Neil Young-esque instrumental segments. The Unfazed is also markedly less depressing than any of the band’s previous efforts. Tracks like the vengeful “Country Clutter” and the restless “Fools Gold Ring” keep it from being altogether upbeat, but the album’s closing track, the touching “How Is It,” questions the narrator’s luck (“How is it we have just known of each other/ And we talk like old friends/ And we kiss like young lovers/ And we have nowhere to stand except next to one another?”) and takes a step away from the edge of the cliff Dolorean has always teetered on. “The general sentiment in country music is ‘Things are bad, but we’ll be OK. We’ll get through it,’” James says. “I want to get to where I can state the second half of that more eloquently.” But eloquence has never really been a problem for Dolorean. Four exceptional albums into the band’s career and there’s hardly been an awkward musical moment along the way. Why the world hasn’t entirely caught on is a bit of a mystery. “I think we still fly under the radar a bit, but I don’t take it personally,” James says with a smile. That low profile can actually be liberating. Instead of plotting a big release show, Dolorean—a band that should be headlining the Crystal Ballroom by now—is playing a free show at one of its favorite bars, LaurelThirst. “How many times can you shake down your friends for a $10 cover over a decade?” James asks. “We’ve shifted our mentality to ‘Let’s just make it as fun as we can.’” “Fun” wasn’t always an appropriate word for Dolorean. These days, it is. SEE IT: Dolorean plays at Laurelthirst on Saturday, Dec. 18, with Meridian. 9 pm. Free. 21+. Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

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group—whose recent compilation album, Violence From the Vault, is a nice primer for the uninitiated— is only playing a dozen stateside shows in 2010, having buried whatever hatchets that had torn the group apart in the early part of this decade. Portland is lucky enough to play host to one of them. Embrace just how lucky you are and get in line early for this one. ROBERT HAM. Dante’s. 9 pm. $12. 21+.

Nightclubbing: Guidance Counselor, Linger & Quiet, DJ Sexy Cousin

[HOUSE PARTY] Tonight marks the first appearances of both Guidance Counselor and DJ Sexy Cousin (whom you probably know better as Mike McKinnon from Reporter and, of course, the Potato Champion cart) at Holocene’s long-running, monthly house-experimental dance party Nightclubbing. Of course, regular hosts Linger & Quiet will be on hand to keep things running as smoothly as usual (which means lots of hot and sweaty dancefloor action), but we are especially excited to hear how Guidance Counselor’s dark, gritty-yet-glam electro-punk will fit into the mix. This performance will cap what has been quite a year for the group, which finally (after some hard drive crash-related delays) released its self-titled full-length debut back in April. REBECCA RABER. Holocene. 9 pm. $3. 21+.

with classics from the band’s heyday in its live sets, should have goths, punks, and music nerds in their own version of nirvana. ROBERT HAM. Wonder Ballroom. 8:30 pm. $20 advance, $25 day of show. All ages.

FRIDAY, DEC. 17 The Stolen Sweets, Cuadro Picadueña [DUST-BOWL DITTIES] Portland vocal-jazz ensemble the Stolen Sweets are a time-machine kind

of band, with skilled emulation of 1920s and ’30s sounds that would have flappers’ garters in a bunch. But apparently Marty McFly jumped in that time machine along with Cab Calloway and the Boswell Sisters. Unlike many groups of similar ambition, the Sweets’ antiquated genre of choice is brought into the modern landscape with three-part siren songs driven along by dirty horns and plucky guitar. The authenticity is there, but the Sweets also

CONT. on page 30

PREVIEW

THE PRIDS

Monsters of the Accordion

INVITES YOU AND A GUEST TO A SPECIAL ADVANCE SCREENING OF

[BUTTONS ’N’ BELLOWS] If cellos and ukuleles can rock, why not the infamous instrument that launched a thousand polkas? Seattle singer and accordionist Jason Webley has been rounding up fellow accordion accomplices for annual squeezeboxing matches. This tour’s motley collection includes performers as celebrated for their bellowing vocals as their bellowed boxes: San Francisco’s Renée de la Prade (who punkishly purveys tunes from two great accordion traditions, Zydeco and Celtic music), the high-energy, L.A.-based Balkan music ensemble Petrojvic Blasting Company, New York’s Corn Mo (who’s played with They Might Be Giants and Polyphonic Spree), and Portland’s own operatic tenor and accordionist Eric Stern of Vagabond Opera. BRETT CAMPBELL. Kennedy School. 7 pm. $10. All ages.

The Woods Holiday Special: Laura Gibson, Musee Mecanique, Alela Diane, Michael Hurley, Lewi Longmire, Denver, Duover, Johanna Kunin, Dave Depper, Mike Midlo, Quiet Life, Great Wilderness, Ezza Rose, Greylag

[WINTER CELEBRATION] Well, The Woods sure knows how to throw a holiday party. For the club’s first holiday gathering, it’s assembled a veritable who’s who of all-stars from the local folk-rock scene: Alela Diane, Michael Hurley, Laura Gibson and Mike Midlo of Pancake Breakfast, along with newcomers like Duoever and Ezza Rose. Everyone will sing holiday favorites and originals, and expect at least a few surprise guests and collaborations. Gather up your favorite ugly holiday sweater and let the music warm you up. MICHAEL MANNHEIMER. The Woods. 8 pm. $5. 21+.

Killing Joke

SCREENING IS THURSDAY, DECEMBER 16TH AT 7PM.

GO TO WWW.GOFOBO.COM/RSVP AND ENTER THE CODE WWEEK7GGU TO DOWNLOAD YOUR PASSES. THIS FILM IS RATED PG-13. PARENTS STRONGLY CAUTIONED. Some Material May Be Inappropriate For Children Under 13. Please note: Passes received through this promotion do not guarantee you a seat at the theatre. Seating is on a first come, first served basis, except for members of the reviewing press. Theatre is overbooked to ensure a full house. No admittance once screening has begun. All federal, state and local regulations apply. A recipient of tickets assumes any and all risks related to use of ticket, and accepts any restrictions required by ticket provider. Paramount Pictures, Willamette Week and their affiliates accept no responsibility or liability in connection with any loss or accident incurred in connection with use of a prize. Tickets cannot be exchanged, transferred or redeemed for cash, in whole or in part. We are not responsible if, for any reason, recipient is unable to use his/her ticket in whole or in part. All federal and local taxes are the responsibility of the winner. Void where prohibited by law. No purchase necessary. Participating sponsors, their employees and family members and their agencies are not eligible. NO PHONE CALLS!

IN THEATERS DECEMBER 22 WWW.TRUEGRITMOVIE.COM

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[FRESH FEVER] If you’ve only ever heard Killing Joke’s minor U.S. chart success “Eighties” (or the Nirvana song which shares a suspiciously similar bassline with that tune), you’ve only picked up on one sliver of the story of this audacious and brilliant band. The albums that Jaz Coleman and Co. released during the ’80s took the promise of punk rock and melded it with the band’s view of a world that was foreboding, depressing, and angering. To that end, Killing Joke’s music went for the jugular with steely guitar and bass tones and Coleman’s unholy bark. New material, including 2010’s Absolute Dissent, has only deepened these dark shades, and when mixed

THE FUZZY BALL FRIDAY, DEC. 17 [DRIVING PSYCHEDELIA] Why does the loosely configured genre of shoegaze continue to provide so much inspiration, some 15 years after many of its progenitors brought it to life? For any sensitive lad or lass who grew up too weedy for punk and too cheerful for goth, the sound of bands like Ride, Pale Saints and Swervedriver hit you right in your emotional center. The lyrics were thoughtful and literary (see: Ride’s liberal use of J.D. Salinger quotes in the song “Polar Bear” from the 1990 LP Nowhere) and the heavily processed, overdriven guitars sounded...well, like nothing else on this planet. Shoegaze had its own fashion sense—fitted jeans, suede jackets and long-sleeved tees were a typical uniform— to ensure band members looked incredibly cool standing stockstill onstage and staring at their guitar pedals. If that weren’t enough, the volume that these bands often played at provided a cathartic rush ( just ask anyone who survived the “Armageddon” section of My Bloody Valentine’s “You Made Me Realise” at the quartet’s 2009 show in Seattle). The band members’ (and fans’) liberal use of psychotropic drugs probably didn’t hurt the music’s appeal, either. For these reasons and more, bands like the Pains of Being Pure at Heart and A Sunny Day in Glasgow—or local outfits such as the Prids and the High Violets—still mine that rich shoegaze sound for inspiration. And it’s why the Shoegazers’ Ball, an annual concert that Reverb Records owner Michael Fitzgerald held from 2002 to 2005, was such a rousing success. “It seemed like every week or so since we stopped doing the shows, someone would come up to me and ask, ‘When are you gonna do another one? You gotta do that again,’” Fitzgerald says. Finally ready to answer the call, Fitzgerald has organized a new event for 2010, renamed the Fuzzy Ball to pay tribute to the influence of psychedelic rock on the shoegaze aesthetic. This Friday’s concert features a mind-melting lineup of acts from the Northwest (including the aforementioned Prids, Portland’s Pete International Airport and Seattle’s Hypatia Lake) all playing short sets featuring three covers of their favorite shoegaze/psych tunes and one original. For longtime fans, a chance to revel in the classics (and perhaps inspire a delicious acid flashback); for newbies, perhaps the starting point for a new generation of loud, sensitive pop. Either way, everybody goes home blissed out. Next year could be even bigger. “We tried to fly some folks in this year that would have been amazing,” Fitzgerald says. “But I think that we’ve sown the seeds for some even better things if we pull it off next year.” ROBERT HAM. Shoegaze still lives, despite all the drugs and excessive volume.

SEE IT: The Fuzzy Ball is Friday, Dec. 17, at the Wonder Ballroom. See listings for full lineup. 8 pm. $10. 21+.

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

LIVE MUSIC FULL BAR FOOD FUN Thursday Dec 16th

Curtis Salgado / Alan Hager Duo 8pm Friday Dec 17th

Offbeat Belly Dance 7pm Saturday Dec 18th

The Knuckleheads 9pm

“ALL STAR Northwest BLUES BAND whose members are so Famous, we can’t reveal their names!”

Sunday Dec 19th

“Ninkasi Nights”

- The Best in Portland independent jazz presents: 12/19 Get Smashing Love Power (Tim DuRoche/drums, Reed Wallsmith/saxophone, Noah Bernstein/saxophone, Andre St. James/bass

NEW YEARS EVE

OFFBEAT BELLY DANCE 7PM BROTHERS OF BALADI 9PM

FRIDAY

bring a new-age sexiness and polish to its old-school sound. AP KRYZA. Alberta Rose Theatre. 8 pm. $15. 21+.

Yeah Great Fine, World’s Greatest Ghosts, Your Rival

[WHAT TIME SIGNATURE?] For whatever number of reasons, Portland turns naturally gifted bands into potion-spilling, metermixing mad scientists. It’s happened to the Helio Sequence and Wax Fingers and it’s happening to five-piece groovesman Yeah Great Fine. And it usually happens for the better, in this case evidenced by YGF’s twisting and interweaving vocal layers and the evasive melodies heard on its self-titled debut album. Playing hard to get, YGF is worth the fight, even if you make a fool of yourself trying to clap along. Arrive early for World’s Greatest Ghosts. MARK STOCK. Backspace. 8 pm. $5. All ages.

See album review, this page. Berbati’s Pan. 8 pm. $15 advance, $18 day of show. All ages.

every tuesday - steel drum band 8pm

Portland Cello Project with Corin Tucker Band, Typhoon, The Golden Bears, The PHAME Academy Choir

every wed - Arabesque & Belly Dance 8 PM thursday dec 23rd - alan jones

music 6 nights a week Portland’s best happy hour 5-7 upstairs • 6-8 downstairs All day sunday 3341 SE Belmont thebluemonk.com 503-595-0575

[STRINGS SET] Even with the ball bearings under the floor to bolster you, don’t you sometimes get tired standing around all night at the Crystal? (I know, I’m old.) Well, tonight the venue is bringing in chairs for what is destined to be a surprisingly intimate (and adult, for an all-ages show) evening. That’s good because you’ll want to be comfortable for the Portland Cello Project, which not only makes everything from A-Ha to Justin Timberlake sound lovely thanks to its members’ classical training, but is also known to play epic twohour sets. Tonight PCP will collaborate with the latest project of Sleater-Kinney’s Corin Tucker (which released its debut in October) and the already enormous and symphonic collective Typhoon, among others. REBECCA RABER. Crystal Ballroom. 8 pm (Mezzanine is 21+). $15 advance, $18 day of show. All ages.

Rosie Flores, Lisa & Her Kin

[HONKY-TONK] Don’t let Rosie Flores’ relative obscurity fool you—she should, by all rights, be regarded far and wide as a country music icon. But country music has changed, and so the San Antonian songwriter/guitarist tours the midsized club circuit instead of rocking sports arenas. Which is bad news for her pocketbook, but good news for country music fans, who get to see Flores play her swinging country and rockabilly in an intimate setting. This special holiday gig will no doubt include selections from Flores’ 2005 holiday album, Christmasville, a fine holiday disc that—despite the inclusion of tunes by John Lennon and the Beach Boys—sounds like it could have been recorded in the 1950s as easily as the aughts. CASEY JARMAN. Duff’s Garage. 9 pm. $10. 21+.

Mic Crenshaw, Hives Inquiry Squad, Destro & L Pro, DJ IZM

MONDAY-SATURDAY 11-7 503-771-2397 6420 SE FOSTER ROAD, PORTLAND OREGON WWW.FOSTERHEALINGCENTER.ORG

NEXT TO HIGHWAY 420

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

Charlie Hunter

[JAZZ MAN] Mr. Charlie Hunter is a Joe Satriani-trained guitar whiz so talented he requires specially made seven- and eight-string guitars to showcase his mind-bending talent. The Rhode Islander broke ground in 1993 with his skillful debut, Prawn Song, under the Charlie Hunter Trio

moniker. Hunter is currently touring solo with fresh material from his Public Domain record, ripe with jazzy nuances and bluesy fret whittling. He travels light because he’s many musicians in the body of one. As he plays bass and rhythm simultaneously, it’s best to follow the cardinal rule of car sickness: Simply focus on one stationary object, or you’re gonna get nauseous. MARK STOCK. Mississippi Studios. 9 pm. $15 advance, $18 day of show. 21+.

CONT. on page 32

ALBUM REVIEW

Agalloch, Allerseelen, Aerial Ruin

Special January 1st new years day show

Devin Phillips band 9pm

about how a band should sound. Hives Inquiry Squad, the Portland duo of Gavin Theory and Lucas Dix, opens—which guarantees a crowd that loves to dance. CASEY JARMAN. East Chinatown Lounge. 9 pm. Cover. All ages.

M Y S P A C E . C O M /A G A L L O C H

MUSIC

[HIP-HOP] After some delays (oh, hip-hop!), Mic Crenshaw is having a full-on release party for his latest disc, Under the Sun. And it’s an event worthy of celebration: The album plays to Crenshaw’s strengths, mixing autobiographical lyricism with big beat party jams and the occasional dose of trippy, drum-’n’-bass-inspired dance music. Crenshaw has built a name for himself with his tireless work ethic and heart-on-sleeve live performances. Tonight’s show will also feature a live band, but don’t worry, this won’t be one of those half-assed live hip-hop groups— Crenshaw’s time with Hungry Mob taught him a thing or two

AGALLOCH MARROW OF THE SPIRIT (PROFOUND LORE) [ART METAL] It’s easy for someone who grew up on a steady diet of indie rock, folk and pop music to snicker at black metal. Usually the scorn from the uninitiated isn’t because of the music’s dark undertones, pummeling riffage, or high-pitched, squalling guitar tones—it’s because they’re scared to like the vocals. Shrieking, creepy and decidedly un-pop, the voices that dot black metal bands from Norway to the Pacific Northwest are intimidating for an outsider to hear without thinking of Isaac screaming from a cross in Children of the Corn. So it was a bit surprising when the advanced stream of Agalloch’s Marrow of the Spirit—an adventurous, wandering artrock opus that also happens to feature growling/hissing vocals you won’t hear on a Mogwai record—appeared on NPR’s music blog, of all places. Is music this heavy and dark starting to cross over to the mainstream? While local quartet Agalloch probably isn’t black metal’s equivalent of the Shins, Marrow of the Spirit might be the album that converts people who normally wouldn’t go near this stuff. Though it’s steeped in the lineage of metal, Marrow of the Spirit—Agalloch’s fourth album in 15 years—is almost more atmospheric than bombastic, mixing passages of English folk, towering guitar solos and slow, glacial breakdowns. It’s metal as art rock, with epic, winding arrangements, super-long songs (besides the short instrumental intro, the five tracks vary from nine to 17 minutes), introspective bits of piano and cello, and yes, the raspy voice of frontman John Haughm. Still, it’s almost three minutes into de-facto opener “Into the Painted Grey” before Haughm even sings one note. His vocals are just one part of the mix, lost in a stream of interlocking riffs and textural drones. The guitars are the real stars here, from the ringing 12-string acoustic floating through “The Watcher’s Monolith” to the spectral, sky-bound leads and wall of noise that carry “Ghosts of the Midwinter Fires” past any recent shoegaze caricature. Throughout Marrow of the Spirit, Agalloch refuse to stay within any one genre or mood. The band uses extreme, full-throttle black metal as a stylistic jumping-off point to create a work of art that anyone with an open mind should inevitably dig. Maybe NPR gravitated toward this because of guest Jackie Perez Gratz (Grayceon, Giant Squid) and her excellent cello work, or the progressive nature of the band’s compositions. But I love to think that people are coming for the thrill of listening to something foreign and staying because they realize that’s it’s actually a really great rock record. Just don’t let the vocals keep you away. MICHAEL MANNHEIMER. SEE IT: Agalloch plays Friday, Dec. 17, at Berbati’s Pan. 8 pm. $15 advance, $18 day of show. All ages.

PDXMAS

Split release party for Willamette Week’s Another Gray Christmas compilation and Paul Laxer’s second annual PDXMas.

Mon. - Wed. 10 am to 11 pm • Thurs, Fri, Sat. 10 am to Midnight • Sun. Noon to 9 pm

Shop

SpartacuS

Duover, Bret Vogel (of Incredible Yacht Control and Crosstide) and Sam Cooper, plus Holiday Surprises

Mississippi Studios • Wednesday, Dec. 22 Doors at 8:30. Show at 9 pm. Free. 21+.

Gift cards available!

Get the WW compilation for $5 (or listen for free) at anothergraychristmas.bandcamp.com. • All proceeds benefit p:ear.

newr! flavo

the vitaminwater stur-D season pass: ®

$99 for a 2010-2011 season of night skiing/boarding at visit www.skihood.com to purchase the pass. get D-listed by vitaminwater® (this time it’s a good thing!) starting monday, december 13th, vitaminwater® will D-list 10 of you – one per day, every weekday – through dec. 24. go to www.vitaminwaterpdx.com to enter for your chance to win: _________________________________________________ a vitaminwater stur-D season pass to mt. hood meadows a vitaminwater snowboard a vitaminwater dakine pack stuffed with vitaminwater stur-D ® ® ®

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stur-D Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

MUSIC

MAKE IT A NIGHT Present that night’s show ticket and get $3 off any menu item Sun - Thur in the dining room

Muddy River Nightmare Band, All Bets on Death, The Pissdrunks, The Hickmans

DOUG FIR RESTAURANT + BAR OPEN 7AM - 2:30AM EVERYDAY

SERVING BREAKFAST, LUNCH, DINNER, LATE-NIGHT. FOOD SPECIALS 3-6 PM EVERYDAY COVERED SMOKING PATIO, FIREPLACE ROOM, LOTS OF LOG. LIVE SHOWS IN THE LOUNGE... A MID-WINTERS NIGHT OF HEARTWARMING ROCK ACTION

THE ANGRYDAY!ORTS

A LOG LOVIN’ SHAKEDOWN WITH

AND I WAS LIKE WHAT? DAY!

+THE HORDE & THE HAREM +SYMMETRY/SYMMETRY WEDNESDAY DECEMBER 15 • $7 ADVANCE THURSDAY DAY DECEMBER 16 • $7 ADVANCE CYNICAL POP FROM FORMER FRONTMAN OF THE CZARS

FRIDAY! FRIDAY

JOHN

GRANT

EPIC, FACE-MELTING ROCK FROM TORONTO

DAY!

DANKO JONES

Doors at 5:30pm, Show at 6pm

+MARTY MARQUIS FRIDAY DECEMBER 17 • $12 ADVANCE

SATURDAY DECEMBER 18

SPRAWLING MEDITATIVE MAJESTY FROM ACCLAIMED SF DUO

THE RETURN OF THE GODFATHER OF TRIP-HOP

FRIDAY - SATURDAY

Basically, these are a bunch of bands with rad names. Don’t discount the importance of a rad band name. Portland’s Muddy River Nightmare Band sounds like you’d imagine a band called Muddy River Nightmare Band would sound, while Seattle’s All Bets on Death are fuzzy and loud and fuck you. No, not you—I mean that’s what they sound like. Any band with a song called “All My Heroes Are In Hell” is all right by me. Anyway, just another ass-kicking, swill-pounding night at Slabtown— Northwest Portland’s fuck you-iest club. CASEY JARMAN. Slabtown. 9 pm. $5. 21+.

Velella Velella (featuring Vanimal), DJ Bill Portland

[DANCE MUSIC] One of the nice things about booking the Woods is that you can play the Sellwood venue any time you want, really. Luckily for us, Jeremy Hadley’s Seattle/Portland organic dance outfit, Velella Velella, is really fucking good—an intriguing gumbo of ’70s funk and Daft Punk; “The Hustle” meeting Beck’s “Where It’s At” in a dark alley and doing unseemly things with it. The underrated dance squad—which uses a handful of analog synths and traditional rock instruments en route to making your ass move—released Atlantis Massif earlier this year, and it’s kind of like a really funky hip-hop record without all the rapping. And the occasional super-bonus-sexy female vocals courtesy of Johanna Kunin. Can’t miss, I’m telling you. CASEY JARMAN. The Woods. 9 pm. $7. 21+.

The Fuzzy Ball: The Prids, Pete International Airport, The Upsidedown, Rick Bain & The Genius Position, 1776, Hawkeye, Ten Million Lights

See preview, page 28. Wonder Ballroom. 8 pm. $10. 21+.

SATURDAY, DEC. 18 Live Wire! Radio

TRICKY SUNDAY DECEMBER 19 •

$23 ADVANCE

THRONES +LICHENS SATURDAY DECEMBER 18 • $15 ADVANCE THE RETURN OF THE AMIGO/AMIGA FAMILY HOLIDAY PARTY

DREW GROW & THE PASTOR’S WIVES

A PRE-HOLIDAY SMORGASBORD OF NW TALENT

NORMAN

JOSHUA ENGLISH

+PANCAKE BREAKFAST

WEDNESDAY DECEMBER 22 • $7 ADVANCE IN MUSIC WE TRUST PRESENTS THEIR MONTHLY SHOWCASE

REVA DEVITO

KELLI SCHAEFER

+NO MORE TRAIN GHOSTS

TUESDAY DECEMBER 21 •

$5 ADVANCE

A SPECIAL PRE-CHRISTMAS THROW-DOWN WITH PDX’S BEST NEW LIVE BAND

TONY OZIER

NEW YORK RIFLES

+BARRY BRUSSEAU WEDNESDAY DECEMBER 29 • $5 AT THE DOOR

THURSDAY DECEMBER 23 •

$8 ADVANCE

DUSKY FOLK-POP FROM CALIFORNIA RISING STAR

JOEY PORTER’S TRIBUTE TO STEVIE WONDER 1/16

LISSIE

THURSDAY DECEMBER 30 • $13 ADVANCE

BOBBY LONG 1/31 THE BLOW 2/2 VERSUS 2/25 ASOBI SEKSU 3/6

GUANTANAMO BAYWATCH 12/26 • THE PHYSICAL HEARTS 12/28 • LISSIE 12/30 WEINLAND NEW YEARS EVE 12/31 • CASEY NEILL & THE NORWAY RATS 1/7 • THE TUMBLERS 1/8 LITTLE DRAGON 1/10 • DEAD MEADOW 1/12 • THE DON OF DIVISION ST. 1/13 • PETER WOLF CRIER 1/14 AADVANCE TICKETS AT TICKETSWEST 503-224-TIXX - www.ticketswest.com, MUSIC MILLENNIUM, JACKPOT RECORDS • SUBJECT TO SERVICE CHARGE &/OR USER FEE ALL SHOWS: 8PM DOORS / 9PM SHOW• 21+ UNLESS NOTED • BOX OFFICE OPENS 1/2 HOUR BEFORE DOORS • ROOM PACKAGES AVAILABLE AT www.jupiterhotel.com

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

[RADIO, RADIO] Never been to a taping of Live Wire!, the onstage performance of OPB’s one-hour radio variety show? (And you call yourself a Portlander?) Well, don’t let 2010 end without remedying that oversight. Lucky you: The final show of the year is a doozy, featuring superstars like Sleater-Kinney and Wild Flag’s Carrie Brownstein (in anticipation of her forthcoming IFC comedy series, Portlandia); PDX’s favorite auteur, Gus Van Sant; the man behind the It Gets Better Project, Dan Savage; and music from Kill Rock Stars star Thao Nguyen and worldbeat drummer Obo Addy. All these local luminaries will be together under one stately yet intimate roof at the Alberta Rose Theatre. With advice like this, don’t say we never gave you anything. REBECCA RABER. Alberta Rose Theatre. 7:30 pm (minors accompanied by parent). $20 GA, $35 reserved. All ages.

My Life in Black & White, The Second Academy, The Stims, The Beautiful Mothers

[DRUNK PUNK] We are now five years into the career of My Life in Black and White, and the Portland quintet is still drawing ample motivation from the twin gods of Pabst and growly discontent. The group falls somewhere between Dropkick Murphys and Against Me! in terms of style and somewhere in the neighborhood of Dead Kennedys when it comes to DIY ethic. Since 2006 it has released three albums on its lonesome, and each one has shown a surprising reaffirmation of My Life’s commitment to raucousness. The band lives to party, and the birthday of the Big-Ass Sandwiches food cart is as good an occasion as any. SHANE DANAHER. Ash Street Saloon. 9:30 pm. $5. 21+.

Braille, Odd Thomas, Theory Hazit, Xperiment

[HIP-HOP] We haven’t heard much from Braille lately, and fans could be forgiven for thinking the Portland MC had slipped quietly into that dark night—he’s a dad and a graphic designer, among other jobs. But lo and behold, the spiritually minded MC is an architect as well, and it’s that job—crafting the blueprints for a new label called Humble Beast Records—that has been keeping Braille busy as of late. Humble Beast is also the name of a new recording project for Braille and recent Portland transplant (via Southern California) Odd Thomas—if we’re lucky, we’ll hear a couple tracks tonight at the label’s official coming-out party. Also on hand will be longtime Braille collaborator Theory Hazit and producer Xperiment, a transplant from Colorado who makes gargantuan circus beats that sound like J-Dilla with the speakers blown out (in a good way). CASEY JARMAN. Backspace. 8 pm. $5. All ages.

Danko Jones, Guests

[MAPLE LICKS] For a band that initially refused to enter a studio for fear the subsequent recordings would dull the glistening edges of its famously frenetic live performances, Danko Jones—both the captivating frontman/songwriter/ wunderkind and his Toronto rawk outfit of the same name—has vividly embraced all aspects of the album, as wholly and distinct and masterful as its transcendent rendition of the most commonplace rock’n’-roll blueprint. It’s not, perhaps, new, with furrows plowed too frequently by countless bands on both sides of the border for the wheels of rawk to be usefully reinvented. If anything, recent release Below the Belt takes such ecstatic thrills, layering a succession of broadly quoted AC/DC or Kiss or Metallica riffs over the top of an already bristling power pop so mannered and muscular that some critics have

openly wondered if Jones (a wellregarded author trading band tours with spoken-word stints) intends the resolutely party hearty riff-fests as anything more than satire. JAY HORTON. Doug Fir Lounge. 6 pm. $10 advance, $12 day of show. 21+.

Om, Thrones, Lichens

[DRONE-OPHILES] For fans of sound nearing the thunderously low audible basement of 20 hertz, tonight is going to be an early Christmas. Om and Thrones are two of drone metal’s foremost talents: Om takes ambient metal into the realms of Sufi mysticism, and Thrones’ Joe Preston unleashes his one-man wall of skuzzy noise in regular doses upon his Northwest home. The newcomer to this lineup is Lichens, the solo project of 90 Day Men’s Robert Lowe. Lichens constructs its tracks from mishmashed vocal riffs and other acoustic samples, giving its work a less menacing feel than its compatriots’. However, Lowe’s tracks still operate in an emotional neighborhood presided over by creeping dread. SHANE DANAHER. Doug Fir Lounge. 9 pm. $15. 21+.

Dead Kenny G’s

[GONZO JAZZ] Could it be that Frank Zappa has an army of illegitimate children in Seattle, and if so would it be possible for all of them to wind up playing in a band together? That’s the only logical explanation for bizarro trio Dead Kenny G’s. Each member—Mike Dillon, Skerik and Brad Houser— blasts away at multiple instruments, synthesizers and other toys while the music bounds from funky jazz to abstract experimentation to straight-up rock, often within seconds. It’s nutso stuff, and the group’s latest LP, Bewildered Herd, is an immersion swan dive into musical mischief that would do (hypothetical) daddy proud. AP KRYZA. Goodfoot. 9 pm. $10. 21+.

PRIMER

CONT. on page 34

BY CASEY JA RMA N

TRICKY Born: Jan. 27, 1968, as Adrian Nicholas Matthews Thaws in Bristol, England. Sounds like: A dark alley you shouldn’t have walked through; a rave in a smoky old jazz club. For fans of: Portishead, Massive Attack, Tom Waits, Brian Eno, Sade, Curtis Mayfield, Lil Wayne. Latest release: Mixed Race, which breeds Tricky’s hallmark dark and minimal electronic vibe with jazz and world-music influences. Why you care: In the mid-’90s, Tricky was heralded from the underground to the mainstream press as a great musical visionary who was bound to become—along with Moby and that tri-hawked guy from Prodigy—an enduring voice of an emerging electronic generation. Hearing his 1995 debut, Maxinquaye, it was hard to argue the point. A brooding, funky disc full of fucked-up reggae and hip-hop swagger, the disc sounded like nothing before it. Three albums later, Tricky had lost some of his mysterious appeal, and much of the world lost interest. Tricky’s 1998 release, Angels With Dirty Faces, traded in long, psychedelic tracks that felt almost improvisational in nature (keep in mind this was the year Radiohead released its own dystopian masterpiece, OK Computer, which made many of Tricky’s electronic contemporaries look downright silly), and by the 1999 release of Juxtapose, he had dismantled and rearranged his sound until it was almost unrecognizable. There are songs to mine from his uneven aughts output—especially from Knowle West Boy, which trades Tricky’s focus from loop experiments to compelling song structures. About two-thirds of this year’s Mixed Race EP feels like a return to form. The others feel grossly unnecessary. But that’s Tricky in a nutshell. SEE IT: Tricky plays Doug Fir on Sunday, Dec. 19. 9 pm. $23 advance, $25 day of show. 21+.

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Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

MUSIC

SATURDAY - TUESDAY

Bar Bar Lounge & Patio Now Open Daily !

A hot n’ local triple bill with PDX sonic pleasers

THE BROTHERS YOUNG

NEAL MORGAN +THE OCEAN FLOOR

WEDNESDAY DECEMBER 15

$6 Adv

An evening with Brandi Carlile’s mistress of rhythm

ALLISON MILLER

+TODD SICKAFOOSE’S TINY RESISTORS EVENING SHOW

• MOSTLY SEATED

Doors 7:30/Show 8pm

THURSDAY DECEMBER 16

$13 Adv

A sparkling winter’s evening with gifted jazz guitarist

CHARLIE HUNTER

PARTIALLY SEATED SHOW

FRIDAY DECEMBER 17

$15 Adv

Bar Bar Apt. show with genre bending sweethearts

ZACH ZAITLIN +DANIELLE

FISH

(OF PASCHAL COEUR) EVENING SHOW • IN BAR BAR APT.

SATURDAY DECEMBER 18

$5 Adv

A visually explosive uninhibited queer dance party

MRS. PERFORMANCES BY MS. COCO B & BURLESQUIRE

DJ BEYONDA DJ TRANS FAT DJ IL CAMINO

Hot Pants

PHOTOBOOTH BY BLOODHOUND PHOTOGRAPHY

SATURDAY DECEMBER 18

$5 Adv

A sweet n local showcase with PDX post punkers

THE RESERVATIONS TOTAL NOISE +KAREN SUNDAY DECEMBER 19

FREE!

The Original night out for boys and girls ala LaLuna

THE ORIGINAL QUEER NIGHT PRESENTS

QUEER

QUISTMAS

DJ HUFNSTUF & DJ LUNCHLADY

WITH

+SPECIAL GUEST FANNIE MAE DARLING MONTHLY EVENT • 9pm - 2am in Showroom & Bar Bar

MONDAY DECEMBER 20

FREE!

A hot n’ local double record release with pop conjurers

SECRET CENTURY BRITTLE BONES +LA PUMP

TUESDAY DECEMBER 21

$6 Adv

Willamette Week presents a PDXMAS

DUOVER BRET VOGEL

+SAM COOPER

WEDNESDAY DECEMBER 22

FREE!

TICKETS FOR ALL SHOWS AVAILABLE AT BAR BAR MISSISSIPPI STUDIOS.COM AND JACKPOT RECORDS

UPCOMING SHOWS

Baby Ketten Karaoke 12/26 • Kasey Anderson 12/29 Oh Darling 12/30 • The Helio Sequence 12/31 Ludicra 1/1 • Celilo 1/7 Champagne Champagne 1/8 • Victor Wooten 1/10 Doors 8:30pm, Show 9pm and 21+ unless otherwise noted

3939 N Mississippi • 503-288-3895 Lighting graciously provided by

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

TALK TO THE HAND! NO, REALLY, TALK TO IT!: Braille plays Saturday at Backspace.

Old Light, 1939 Ensemble

[GOOD VIBES] I hate getting CD-Rs. I can’t even go grocery shopping without being handed one of the dreaded coasters. But something very pleasant happened last time I dropped by Revival Drums on 14th and Northeast Prescott. This vintage shop brings back the old-fashioned notion of customer service and makes me feel loved. So when the proprietor, Jose Medeles, sheepishly handed me a demo of his brand-new outfit the 1939 Ensemble, I did something unexpected—I drove straight home and listened to it. Lo and behold, this duo is fucking fantastic. Jose plays drums in the Breeders, too, so you know he’s no slouch. And he runs a drum shop, so his kit sounds perfect. Accompanying him is a vibraphonist who runs his bells through an array of stomp boxes, with novel results. This music is classic, fresh and rejuvenating to my jaded ears. NATHAN CARSON. The Know. 8 pm. Free. 21+.

Dolorean, Meridian

See music feature, page 27. LaurelThirst Public House. 9:30 pm. Free. 21+.

Wow & Flutter, Brittle Bones, Bombs Into You

[UNDERRATED LIFERS] Never easily categorized, local post-punk trio Wow & Flutter has been generally floating beneath the city’s radar since its inception in the mid’90s, and that’s not likely to change with the release of its new album, Equilibrio!. Whereas its previous record, 2008’s Golden Touch, found the band experimenting with glockenspiels, spaghetti western-style trumpets and Balkan party jams, this collection of songs strips away a lot of the ornamentation, leaving the elements that have long defined the group: loud, distorted guitar, driving rhythms and an acidic strain of cynicism. It’s an accomplished piece of work from a trio of vets—it remains to be seen if anyone else will notice. MATTHEW SINGER. The Saratoga. 8 pm. Free. 21+.

SUNDAY, DEC. 19 Tricky, Guests

See Primer, page 32. Doug Fir Lounge. 9 pm. $23 advance, $25 day of show. 21+.

You Who: Laura Veirs as Two Root Beers Veirs, Eric Stern, Cartoon Exprez, Wailin BigAir

[KIDS AND PLAY] Adults know local singer-songwriter Laura Veirs for the dreamy intellectual folk she’s been making for over a decade now, beautifully exemplified most recently on this year’s July Flame. Give that album to a little kid, however, and it’ll probably bore the shit out of him. Halfway through, he’d get tired of the shimmering melodies and delicate arrangements and go back to playing with his poop or whatever it is preschoolers do for fun. Obviously, a normal Veirs set isn’t likely to go over too well in a room full of 10-and-unders. That’s why, for this performance at the monthly children’s variety show You Who, she’s reinventing herself as Two Root Beers Veirs, playing rollicking covers of old-timey tunes backed by members of Black Prairie, Jackstraw and the Decemberists, including You Who co-founder and guitarist-about-town Chris Funk. It should be excitable enough to convince the little brats to stop shoving stuff up their noses and actually pay attention for a few minutes. MATTHEW SINGER. Kennedy School. 1 pm. $10 adults, $5 kids walking age to 12, free for non-walkers. All ages.

TUESDAY, DEC. 21 Amigo/Amiga Holiday Party: Drew Grow & the Pastor’s Wives, Kelli Schaefer, No More Train Ghosts

[HOLIDAY FOLK JAMS] Face it: The Amigo/Amiga holiday party is cooler than yours. Instead of keeping it an in-house celebration, the small and solid local label is putting on its finest attire for a label showcase featuring Drew Grow & the Pastor’s Wives and Kelli Schaefer. Grow just dropped a lovely, mostly acoustic EP called The Comfort Feel this month, and both the title track and the lilting “Lightning Rod” are among the finest post-freak folk songs recorded the last few years. Schaefer, meanwhile, has one one of the finest voices in Portland, a whispering tenor that works on both dark synth-rock songs and the sparse folk that’s made Schaefer one of the most promising singers in this city. There might be better appetizers at other parties, but for

one night, put the dip aside and pay attention to the music. MICHAEL MANNHEIMER. Doug Fir Lounge. 9 pm. $5. 21+.

Secret Century, Brittle Bones

[LOVE TRIO] Last year, guitarist and songwriter Heidi Hull fell in love. Hull, who was living in Salt Lake City at the time, decided to pack up and move to Portland to play in a band with performance artist Jayme Hansen of Fleshtone, and friend Tasha Christensen of Brittle Bones. The trio then formed a band around Hull’s rich voice, and a solo venture and album became Secret Century. Tonight the trio releases its debut, Pleasures Treasures, an adventurous pop record filled with threepart harmonies, pitter-patter drums and layers of synth texture, before it hits the road in the spring on a bike tour of the Northwest. You can’t get more Portland than that. MICHAEL MANNHEIMER. Mississippi Studios. 9 pm. $6. 21+.

A Very Merry Holiday Show with Dragging an Ox Through Water, Neal Morgan, and more

[HOLIDAY MUSICS] Before one gets repelled by the words “holiday show,” one should consider the sources here. Dragging an Ox Through Water is an experimental pop songwriter who writes gorgeous, twangy country ballads and Chuck Berry-esque rock numbers with lyrics about the ugliness of human evolution and the vastness of the universe...then he blows them all to shit with a suitcase full of homemade oscillators and theremins and a board full of pedals. Neal Morgan is an epic drummer (he’s a drummer and co-producer on Joanna Newsom’s Have One on Me, and just got off tour with her) and singer who combines those two disparate talents to great effect— sometimes with a loop pedal and sometimes raw and bare. Both artists are veterans of Willamette Week’s own annual holiday compilation (Dragging an Ox combined “Blue Christmas” and “I’ll be Home for Christmas” into a weird, cool FrankenElvis tune; Morgan contributed “Will it Snow?”—a spacey, abstract number that sounds like a blizzard at a train crossing), and we love them a ton. CASEY JARMAN. CASEY JARMAN. Valentine’s. 9 pm. Free. 21+.

DISH PAGE 25

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

SPOTLIGHT

VIVIANJOHNSON.COM

MUSIC

DOUBLE TROUBLE: Too many bars in Portland struggle to find an identity. Often, a new spot can’t decide whether it wants to be a neighborhood watering hole or a weekend concert venue. Fortunately, The Saratoga (6910 N Interstate Ave., 572-3024) doesn’t have to pick a side—it excels at both. With cheap, stiff drinks ($4 for a tall hot toddy done right); a photo booth; four pinball machines and a sign above the bar announcing that twins (both ordinary and, uh, conjoined) drink for free, the Saratoga is a perfect spot to stop in for a quick pint. The killer is the bar’s second side, with a small stage and ample space for bands, DJs and the odd soul-funk dance night. Right now the live music is mostly relegated to Saturday nights (Wow & Flutter plays this week), but the room is big enough that it could—and hopefully will—become a haven for local garage-rock newbies. MICHAEL MANNHEIMER.

ALBERTA ROSE THEATRE 3000 NE Alberta St., 719-6055 ALBERTA STREET PUBLIC HOUSE 1036 NE Alberta St., 284-7665 ASH STREET SALOON 225 SW Ash St., 226-0430 BACKSPACE 115 NW 5th Ave., 248-2900 BAGDAD THEATER & PUB 3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 236-9234 BEATERVILLE CAFE 2201 N Killingsworth St., 735-4652 BEAUTY BAR 111 SW Ash Street., 224-0773 BERBATI’S PAN 231 SW Ankeny St., 248-4579 BIDDY MCGRAW’S 6000 NE Glisan St., 233-1178 BLUE MONK 3341 SE Belmont St., 595-0575 BO ASIAN BISTRO 400 SW Broadway., 222-2688 BRANX 320 SE 2nd Ave., 234-5683 BRASSERIE MONTMARTRE 626 SW Park Ave., 236-3036 CAMELLIA LOUNGE 510 NW 11th Ave., 221-2130 CROWN ROOM 205 NW 4th Ave., 222-6655 CRYSTAL BALLROOM 1332 W Burnside St., 225-0047 DANTE’S 1 SW 3rd Ave., 226-6630 DOC GEORGE’S JAZZ KITCHEN 4605 NE Fremont St., DOUG FIR LOUNGE 830 E Burnside St.,

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

231-9663 DUFF’S GARAGE 1635 SE 7th Ave., 234-2337 EAST BURN 1800 E. Burnside., 236-2876 EAST CHINATOWN LOUNGE 322 NW Everett St., 226-1659 EAST END 203 SE Grand Ave., 232-0056 ELLA STREET SOCIAL CLUB 714 SW 20th Place., 227-0116 FEZ BALLROOM 316 SW 11th Ave., 221-7262 GOODFOOT 2845 SE Stark St., 239-9292 GROUND KONTROL 511 NW Couch St., 796-9364 HALL OF RECORDS 3342 SE Belmont St., HAWTHORNE THEATRE 3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 233-7100 HEATHMAN RESTAURANT & BAR 1001 SW Broadway., 790-7752 HOLOCENE 1001 SE Morrison St., 239-7639 JIMMY MAK’S 221 NW 10th Ave., 295-6542 KENNEDY SCHOOL 5736 NE 33rd Ave., 249-3983 KNOW 2026 NE Alberta St., 473-8729 LAURELTHIRST PUBLIC HOUSE 2958 NE Glisan St., 232-1504 MISSISSIPPI PIZZA 3552 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3231 MISSISSIPPI STUDIOS 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895 MOCK CREST TAVERN

3435 N Lombard St., 283-5014 MOUNT TABOR THEATER 4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd., MUDAI 801 NE Broadway., 287-5433 PLAN B 1305 SE 8th Ave., 230-9020 PRESS CLUB 2621 SE Clinton St., 233-5656 RONTOMS 600 E Burnside St., 236-4536 ROSELAND 8 NW 6th Ave., 219-9929 (Grill), 224-2038 (Theater) ROTTURE 315 SE 3rd Ave., 234-5683 SLABTOWN 1033 NW 16th Ave., 223-0099 SOMEDAY LOUNGE 125 NW 5th Ave., 248-1030 STAR BAR 639 SE Morrison St., THE KNIFE SHOP 426 SW Washington St., 228-3669 THE SARATOGA 6910 N Interstate Ave., 719-5924 THE WOODS 6637 SE Milwaukie Ave., 890-0408 THE WORLD FAMOUS KENTON CLUB 2025 N Kilpatrick St., 285-3718 TIGA 1465 NE Prescott St., 288-5534 TONIC LOUNGE 3100 NE Sandy Blvd., 238-0543 TONY STARLIGHT’S 3728 NE Sandy Blvd., 517-8584 TUBE 18 NW 3rd Ave., 241-8823 TWILIGHT CAFE & BAR 1420 SE Powell Blvd., 232-3576 VALENTINE’S 232 SW Ankeny St., 248-1600 WONDER BALLROOM 128 NE Russell St., 284-8686

Now available in 12-packs Widmer Brothers Brrr is a unique dark red ale handcrafted with sweet caramel and chocolate malts, balanced by a bold hop profile. Brrr is sure to warm even the chilliest of winter nights. ÂŠ2010 Widmer Brothers Brewing Company, Portland, OR

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

Widmer_9.639x12.25_WW_Brrr

MUSIC CALENDAR

Sellwood Public House Wicky Pickers

DEC. 15-21 Brainstorm, Hello Electric, Holy Children

Editor: Michael Mannheimer. TO HAVE YOUR EVENT LISTED, enter show information at least two weeks in advance on the web at wweek.com/submitmusic. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: mmannheimer@wweek.com. Find more music: reviews 27 | clublist 36 For more listings, check out blogs.wweek.com/music/calendar/

Slim’s

Wizard Boots, Empire Rocket Machine

Someday Lounge The Neck Brace

ADAM KRUEGER

The Knife Shop

The Checkered Present, Brush Prairie, Lesser Saints

The Water Heater El Rey, Youth, Sam Humans, Besties

The Woods

White Eagle

The Northstar Session, Gavin Wahl-Stephens

Wine Down East Lew Jones

Wonder Ballroom

Aloft

Andina

Alice Stuart (9 pm); Morgan Geer, Root Jack (6 pm)

Ash Street Saloon

McMenamins Edgefield Winery

The Andre St. James Trio Pete Krebs Mistah Fab, Cool Nutz, Maniac Lok, Neema, Mikey Vegaz, Dubble 00, Mayo & eRok, Unique, DJ Fatboy

Beaterville Cafe Arthur Moore’s Harmonica Party

Beauty Bar

Baby Ketten Karaoke

Biddy McGraw’s

Stringed Migration (9 pm); Little Sue (6 pm)

Bo Asian Bistro Jordan Harris

Brasserie Montmartre

Jimmy Bivens

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern Lewis Childs

Mississippi Pizza

The We Shared Milk, Your Rival

Mississippi Studios

Brothers Young, Neal Morgan, The Ocean Floor

Mount Tabor Theater Fruition

Mt. Tabor Theater Lounge

Midnight Expressions

Wendy and the Lost Boys (9:30 pm); Dreamdog (7 pm)

Andina Matices

Ash Street Saloon

White Orange, The Empty, The Greater Midwest, Growler, Tricks, The Iron Tide, Gorilla Monsoon, Rockin Fuckin Roll

Backspace

Benefit for JOIN: Nathaniel Talbot, Brittle Bones, Vellarest, Squalora

Beaterville Cafe

The Broken Meters

Biddy McGraw’s Morgan Grace

Blue Monk

Camellia Lounge

Muddy Rudder Public House

Curtis Salgado, Alan Hager

Dante’s

Plan B

Ian James

Kit Taylor

Sugarfree Jazz Jedi Mindf*ck

Doc George’s Jazz Kitchen

Laura Cunard and Guests

Doug Fir Lounge

The Angry Orts, The Horde & The Harem, Buoy LaRue

Duff’s Garage

Suburban Slim’s Blues Jam (9:30 pm); Chris Olson’s High Flyers (6 pm)

Ella Street Social Club Eggplant, Jobo Shakins, The Crenshaw

Fire on the Mountain Joe McMurrian

Goodfoot

Left Coast Country

Hawthorne Theatre

Sleepy Eyed Johns

Ben Larsen & Austin Moore

Hawthorne Theatre The Autonomics, Julias Misfortune, Accidental Intoxication, Radumus, Idol’s Diatribe

Heathman Restaurant & Bar Johnny Martin Trio

Holocene

Nightclubbing: Guidance Counselor, Linger & Quiet, DJ Sexy Cousin

Jimmy Mak’s

The Mel Brown B3 Organ Group

Kells

Tom May

Kennedy School

Pub at the End of the Universe

Buffalo Gap Saloon

Acoustic Attic: Mr. Fisk & Illegable

Deklun and Pace

Rotture

Ben Darwish

Camellia Lounge Upper Left Trio

Brownish Black, Iretsu, Sexo Tropico

Chapel Pub

The Country Inn

Corkscrew Wine Bar

Dub DeBrie Jam

The Knife Shop

Sons of Huns, Fjord, Mouth

The Water Heater

My Dads, Kidcrash, Nuclear Animals, Datura Blues, Lee Corey Oswald

Tony Starlight’s

The Tony Starlight Christmas Extravaganza 6bq9

White Eagle

Jimmy Mak’s

Hawthorne Hophouse

LaurelThirst Public House

A Cautionary Tale, Nathaniel Talbot Trio, Rainbow Jive Hammer

Tom May

Cats Under the Stars, Garcia Birthday Band

Brasserie Montmartre

Heathman Restaurant & Bar

Kells

Goodfoot

Ruby Feathers, The Shivas, The Ex-Girlfriends Club

Vino Vixens

The Mel Brown Quartet

Stefan Andrews

Monsters of the Accordion

Jeffree Star, Dev, It Boys, DJ Gino Mari (of The Gentry), Delta!Bravo

Karla Harris

Bo Asian Bistro

Fire on the Mountain

THURS. DEC. 16 Alberta Rose Theatre Molly’s Revenge, Moira Smiley, Gabrielle Maher Irish Dancers

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

Steve Kerin

Michael Pan

Dante’s

Buzzov*en, Rabbits, Witch Mountain, Stoneburner

Doc George’s Jazz Kitchen

Ron Steen Invitational Jazz Jam Session

Doug Fir Lounge

And I Was Like What?, Symmetry/Symmetry, Water & Bodies, Housefire

Duff’s Garage

JaneFest featuring Karen Lovely (9 pm); Portland Playboys (6 pm)

Ella Street Social Club Echo Candy, Invisible Orchestra, The Glorious First of June

Fenouil

Greg Goebel with Barbara Lusch

JetPak (9:30 pm); Lewi Longmire Band (6 pm)

McMenamins Edgefield Winery Floating Pointe

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern Billy Kennedy

McMenamins-Grand Lodge Marianna Thielen with Reece Marshburn

Mississippi Pizza Arbielle

Mississippi Studios Allison Miller, Todd Sickafoose’s Tiny Resistors

Mount Tabor Theater

Dust Settlers, Bottleneck, Bear & Moose

Muddy Rudder Public House Lauren Sheehan

Original Halibut’s Terry Robb

Paddy’s Bar & Grill

Funk-Jazz Jam Session

Red Room

Arterial Spray, Krix, Cemetary Lust, Facing Extinction, Warmonger

East Chinatown Lounge

Mic Crenshaw, Hives Inquiry Squad, Destro & L Pro, DJ IZM

East End

Broken Water, Thunder Buffalo, Terraform

Fire on the Mountain Scrafford Orser

Ford Food and Drink Pete Krebs

Hawthorne Theater Lounge Rockstar Karaoke Katie Roberts

Hawthorne Theatre

Heathman Restaurant & Bar

Myselfdestruct, Welsh Bowman

Alberta Street Public House

Megafauna

Tony Starlight’s

Twilight Cafe & Bar

LaurelThirst Public House

East Burn

The World Famous Kenton Club 89.1 KMHD’s Divaville Christmas Party

WED. DEC. 15

Rosie Flores, Lisa & Her Kin (9 pm); Joy & Her Sentimental Gentlemen (6 pm)

The Love Loungers, Notes From Underground, Speaker Minds, special guest

Miller & Sasser

TATS ALL, FOLKS!: Mic Crenshaw plays Friday, Dec. 17, at East Chinatown Lounge.

Duff’s Garage

Killing Joke

FRI. DEC. 17 Alberta Rose Theatre The Stolen Sweets, Cuadro Picadueña

Alberta Street Public House Tigerhouse

Aloft

Gordon Neal Herman Trio

Andina

Sambafeat Quartet

Ash Street Saloon

Rozendal, Mercy Graves, Rare Monk, T.H.E.M.E.

Backspace

Yeah Great Fine, World’s Greatest Ghosts, Your Rival

Beaterville Cafe LC3

Berbati’s Pan

Agalloch, Allerseelen, Aerial Ruin

Biddy McGraw’s

The Dust Settlers (9:30 pm); Billy Kennedy & Jimmy Boyer (6 pm)

Bo Asian Bistro

Will Coca, Matt Lindley

Branx

Rum Rebellion, The 86’ers, All Out, Heathen Shrine, Cemetery Lust, Crime Machine

Brasserie Montmartre

Bobby Torres

Jimmy Mak’s

Philly’s Phunkestra, Trio Subtonic

Kells

Grafton Street

Know

Purple Rhinestone Eagle, Edibles

LaurelThirst Public House Fernando, Drunken Prayer (9:30 pm); Sassparilla (6 pm)

Local Lounge

Noah Peterson Soul-Tet

Slim’s

Duff’s Garage

Someday Lounge

Dunes

Underscore Orkestra, Soulfire Bellydance, All the Apparatus, Znama Dance Troupe, Opa Groupa

The Knife Shop

Spirit Lake, Eiger Sanction, Night Surgeon

Mississippi Pizza

Melao de Cuba (9 pm); Blue 4 Trio (6 pm)

The World Famous Kenton Club Bad Assets, Guests

Tonic Lounge Local Hip-Hop

Tony Starlight’s

The Tony Starlight Christmas Extravaganza

Jewels of the Nile

Ella Street Social Club The Jim-Jams

Laura Cunard with Dick Berk Dead Kenny G’s

Hawthorne Hophouse Christian Groth and the Barkers

Hawthorne Theater Lounge Macy Bensley Buster Blue

Hawthorne Theatre

Christian Burghardt CD Release Party, John Thayer Band, Painted Grey, eRok & Mayo

Vino Vixens

Heathman Restaurant & Bar

Pecos, Mermaid Problem, Low - Fi, Cody Weathers Billy D. (without The Hoodoos)

White Eagle

Mitzi Zilka

Jimmy Mak’s

Klickitat, Doc Ocular (9:30 pm); Reverb Brothers (5:30 pm)

The Alan Jones Sextet

Wilfs Restaurant

Know

Kate Davis with Todd Strait, Gary Hobbs

Wonder Ballroom

The Fuzzy Ball: The Prids, Pete International Airport, The Upsidedown, Rick Bain & The Genius Position, 1776, Hawkeye, Ten Million Lights

SAT. DEC. 18 Alberta Rose Theatre

Alberta Street Public House Andina

Borikuas

Artichoke Community Music Holiday Concert and CD Release

Ash Street Saloon

Mock Crest Tavern

Augustana Lutheran Church

Mount Tabor Theater

East End

Twilight Cafe & Bar

Mississippi Studios

Sneakin Out

Boy and Bean

Goodfoot

Velella Velella, DJ Bill Portland

My Life in Black & White, The Second Academy, The Stims, The Beautiful Mothers

Charlie Hunter

East Burn

The Woods

Soul Tribe, Venus Mind

Larry Wilder & The Stumptown Stars

The Shivas

Fenouil

Brownish Black, Poeina Suddarth, Leafeater

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern McMenamins-Grand Lodge

The Buckles

The Water Heater

Live Wire! Radio

Jack McMahon

Doug Fir Lounge

Om, Thrones, Lichens (9 pm); Danko Jones, Guests (6 pm)

McMenamins Hotel Oregon Sky In The Road

The Andre St. James Trio

Muddy River Nightmare Band, All Bets On Death, The Pissdrunks, The Hickmans Professor Gall

Rotture

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

Slabtown

Doc George’s Jazz Kitchen

Augustana Jazz Quartet

Backspace

Kells

Grafton Street Old Light, 1939 Ensemble

LaurelThirst Public House

Dolorean, Meridian Tree Frogs

Macadam’s Bar & Grill The Basic Shapes

Mississippi Pizza

Whiskey Puppy, Tatter & Craig (9:30 pm); Fashion Nuggets tribute to Cake (6:30 pm); Toy Trains (4 pm)

Mississippi Studios

Zach Zaitlin, Danielle Fish of Paschal Coeur

Mock Crest Tavern Blueprints

Mount Tabor Theater

Reeble Jar, Just People, Mr. Wu

Mt. Tabor Theater Lounge Dementia

Muddy Rudder Public House Greg Clarke

Oak Grove Tavern Curtis Interruptus

Original Halibut’s Norman Sylvester

Plan B

Empty Space Orchestra, The Staxx Brothers, Ruby Hill, Greenlander

Braille, Odd Thomas, Theory Hazit, Xperiment

Mt. Tabor Theater Lounge

Bagdad Theater & Pub Dark Side of Oz

Press Club

Beaterville Cafe

Attack of the 50 Ft. Woman

Red Room

Muddy Rudder Public House O’Connor’s Vault

The Miss U’s (Portland’s Premier Rolling Stones Tribute Act)

Jenny Sizzler

Never Strangers

Dave Fleschner Trio

Original Halibut’s

Linda Hornbuckle and Janice Scroggins

Berbati’s Pan

Biddy McGraw’s

Gaia, The Autonomics, Taller Than Rasputin The Pete Krebs Trio Fjord, Zombie Messiah, Protoplanet, The Dirty Words, Child Children

Rotture

Vice Device, Hot Victory, DJ E*Rock, DJ Copy, DJ BJ

Buffalo Gap Saloon

Roots Rock Christmas featuring Drunken Prayer (9:30 pm); Twisted Whistle (5 pm)

Sellwood Public House

Papa G’s Vegan Organic Deli

Bishop Creek Cellars/ Urban Wineworks East

Corner Culture

Camellia Lounge

Plan B

Farnell Newton & Ben Darwish Left & 3/4

Tom Wakeling/Steve Christofferson Quartet

Clyde’s Prime Rib Ocean 503

Crystal Ballroom

Portland Cello Project with Corin Tucker Band, Typhoon, The Golden Bears, The PHAME Academy Choir

Dante’s

Tana & The Fascinators

Doc George’s Jazz Kitchen

Jay Harris Moon By Night Trio

Doug Fir Lounge John Grant, Marty Marquis

Lynn Conover

Aranya, Hunter Becomes the Hunted, Diesto, Black Budget

Press Club

Luminous Things, Tod Morissey, Duover

Proper Eats Cafe Stumptown Jug Thumpers

Red Room

Necryptic, Season Of Suffering, Spear Induced Carnage, Godenied

Roseland

Ty Curtis Band/ Insomniacs, Kevin Selfe & the Tornadoes, Lisa Mann

Rotture

Frivolous, Let’s Go Outside, The Perfect Cyn, Pipedream

Noir Notes

Blue Monk

The Knuckleheads

Branx

American Me, Ocean of Mirrors, Bring Me Solace, Proven, Never Heard the Shot

Brasserie Montmartre Bobby Torres Trio

Buffalo Gap Saloon Karaoke

Camellia Lounge

Ezra Weiss Quartet

Clyde’s Prime Rib Andy Stokes

Dante’s

Jesus Presley Xmas Special

Mystic Canyon, Switchgrass

Slabtown Slim’s

Irie Idea, Lee Corey Oswald, Bloodtypes

The Knife Shop

Holy Children, Donovan Breakwater, Angry Moofah and the Joints

The Saratoga

Wow & Flutter, Brittle Bones, Bombs Into You

The Water Heater

Metropolitan Farms, Ross and the Hellpets, The Contestants

The World Famous Kenton Club

Butterfly, Chico’s Girls, The Smoking Mirrors, Wizard Boots

Tonic Lounge

The Peoples Meat, Subversive

Tony Starlight’s

The Tony Starlight Christmas Extravaganza

Twilight Cafe & Bar Rozendal, The Meta Sound, The Idealist, Feral Drollery

White Eagle

Josh Cole Band, Broken Soviet (9:30 pm); The Student Loan (4:30 pm)

Wilfs Restaurant

Kate Davis with Todd Strait, Gary Hobbs

Wonder Ballroom Lions of Batucada

SUN. DEC. 19 Alberta Rose Theatre Jim Kweskin & Geoff Muldaur

Andina

Danny Romero

Ash Street Saloon

Easter Teeth, The Volt Per Octaves

Biddy McGraw’s Felim Egan

Blue Monk

Get Smashing Love Power

Bo Asian Bistro Will West

Branx

Graf Orlock, Owen Hart, Elitist, Cursebreaker, Reivers

Brasserie Montmartre Ramsey Embick

Clyde’s Prime Rib

Ron Steen Jazz Jam

Dante’s

Sinferno Cabaret, Krotch Rockit

Doc George’s Jazz Kitchen Ed Neumann

Doug Fir Lounge

Tricky, Guests

Hawthorne Theatre

Breathe Kid Breathe, Sunny Travels, Sawtell, B.I.T., Madaleine Noelle

Kells

Brasserie Montmartre

Kennedy School

Dante’s

Guantanamo Baywatch, Boo Frog, DJ Magic Beans

Duff’s Garage

Valentine’s

Irish Sessions You Who: Laura Veirs as Two Root Beers Veirs, Eric Stern, Cartoon Exprez, Wailin BigAir

LaurelThirst Public House Billy Kennedy & Tim Acott (9 pm); Freak Mountain Ramblers (6 pm)

Mississippi Pizza

How Long Jug Band (9 pm); Thistle & Rose, Lincoln Crockett (6 pm)

Mississippi Studios

The Reservations, Total Noise, Karen

Mount Tabor Theater Grind Time Now, the World’s Largest Hip Hop Battle League

Mt. Tabor Theater Lounge

Rockabilly Lounge with Kyle Black

Rotture

Graf Orlock, Owen Hart, Elitist, Reivers, Cursebreaker

Slim’s

NoPoMoJo

Star Bar

Presented by Down Under Rock

The Knife Shop Anne

The Springwater Grill Zenda Torrey and Neal Mattson

Tony Starlight’s

Dean Martin Holiday Special

MON. DEC. 20 Aloft

Martini

D.K. Stewart

Karaoke From Hell Big “D” Jamboree (8:30 pm); Chris Miller Band (6 pm)

Dunes

Mauser, Bog People, Nerveskade Peroxide

Ella Street Social Club

Anson Wright & Tim Gilson

Kells

TUES. DEC. 21 Neftali Rivera

Rumberos del Caribe

Ash Street Saloon

Jackstraw

Living Room Theaters

Frightening Waves of Blue

Beaterville Cafe

LaurelThirst Public House

Blue Monk

Macadam’s Bar & Grill

Pamela Jordan Band

The Station with Chris Lay

McMenamins Edgefield Winery

Kung Pao Chickens (9 pm); Little Sue & Lynn Conover (6 pm)

Bo Asian Bistro

McMenamins Edgefield Winery

Shelly Rudolph & Chance Hayden

Mississippi Pizza

Camellia Lounge

Mississippi Studios

Skip vonKuske

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern Bob Shoemaker

Mississippi Pizza

Canoe, AW Feldt, Alan Deans

Mount Tabor Theater

Pojama People, Sneakin’ Out

Muddy Rudder Public House Lloyd Jones

Chris Margolin

Brasserie Montmartre

Weekly Jazz Jam

Dante’s

Secret Century, Brittle Bones

Doug Fir Lounge

Rotture

Duff’s Garage

O’Connor’s Vault The Knife Shop

Ella Street Social Club

Vulpine Slips, Levi, Sam Tongue

Baby Ketten Karaoke

Mock Crest Tavern

Dover Weinberg Quartet (9:30 pm); Trio Bravo (6 pm)

Julie and the Boy

Caleb Klauder

The Ed Forman Show, DSL Open Mic Comedy Amigo/Amiga Holiday Party: Drew Grow & The Pastor’s Wives, Kelli Schaefer, No More Train Ghosts

The Indigo Art Tribe

Jeff Jensen Band

White Fang, Metavette, Josh K, Chad Ferro

The Woods

Holiday Record Hop: DJ AM Gold, Boy & Bean, Hiccup Kenny & The Bullets

Tony Starlight’s

Marianna and the Baby Vamps

Valentine’s

The World Famous Kenton Club

Fez Ballroom

Salon L’Orient Winter Solstice

A Very Merry Holiday Show with Dragging an Ox Through Water, Neal Morgan, and more

Thirsty Lion

Fire on the Mountain

White Eagle

Brad Parsons

Goodfoot

Scott Pemberton Trio

Crown Room East End

Kells

Steel Drum Music

WED. DEC. 15

LaurelThirst Public House

Tim Wilcox Band

Nordic Thunder

New-Rotic & Lipgloss: DJs Retrograde, Retrovirus and Beetlebum

Cronin Tierney

Local Lounge

Cronin Tierney

DJ Maxamillion

Crush Drum and Bass featuring Spirit

Kymberlee, Alex Miller, Now It Is

Jimmy Mak’s

Beauty Bar

Eric Tonsfeldt

The Woods

Justa Pasta

Wy’East, Four On The Floor

Andrea’s Cha Cha Club

Eric John Kaiser Hosts The PDX Songwriter Showcase

Biddy McGraw’s

Jimmy Mak’s

White Eagle

Hawthorne Theatre

Andina

Counterfeit Cash

Star Bar

Afroknot

Denver and Kele Goodwin

Andina

Her Death and After, All She Wrote, Elenora, Forever Ends Today

Hawthorne Hophouse The Mel Brown Septet (8 pm); The Greg Goebel Trio featuring Chris Brown (6:30 pm)

% (Owner/Operator), Gold Lichens

S.I.N. with Podunk, BFE

Scott Head

Tube

Nick Peets

DJ Smooth Hopperator

Ground Kontrol DJ Cache

FRI. DEC. 17 Beauty Bar Slimkid3

Crown Room

Wild Life: Tyler Tastemaker, Devonwho, Lifepartner

Goodfoot

Tiga

Hostile Tapeover

Valentine’s DJ Strategy

SUNDAY DEC. 19 Ground Kontrol DJ Nate C.

Hall of Records

DJ Aquaman’s Soul Stew

Matador

Holocene

Groove Suite

Plan B

DJ El Rubio

DJ Donny Don’t

DJ Zac Eno, DJ Rumtrigger, Gulls, E*Rock

After Dark

Matador

Lola’s Room at the Crystal Ballroom

Slim’s

‘80s Video Dance Attack

East End

Star Bar

Element Restaurant & Lounge

Tiga

Mello Monday’s with DJ Mello Cee

Valentine’s

DJ Tibin

Highway To Hell DJ DirtyNick DJ Gregarious Cap’n Tony & DJ Hornet Leg

Valentine’s

DJ Baby Dollar$

THURS. DEC. 16

DJ Owen & Guest DJs

Ground Kontrol

DJ ATF, DJ Webb

DJ Ikon

DJ Dareck Fansler DJ Vision Quest and DJ Stoned Werewolf

MON. DEC. 20 DJ Matt Stranger

Ground Kontrol Hall of Records Clarence Duffy

Mississippi Studios

SAT. DEC. 18

DJ Hufnstuf, DJ Lunchlady

Beauty Bar

Star Bar

Fez Ballroom

Crown Room

The World Famous Kenton Club

Thursdays Are Gay Shadowplay

Hall of Records

DJ Thomas Ballard

Plan B

DJ Gutter Glamour, Guest DJ’s!

Someday Lounge

The Fix: Rev. Shines, KEZ, Dundiggy, Wajeed & Invincible DJ Roxie Stardust

Star Bar Tiga

DJ Snacks

Valentine’s

DJs Aubrey Horne and Catherine Beefheart

Girls Night Out Club Crooks: DJ IZM & Easter Egg

Fez Ballroom

Amateur DJ Night

Old Country Night with Billy Lee

Twice As Nice

Ground Kontrol

DJ Destructo, DJ I (heart) U

Holocene

DJ Snowtiger, Mr. Charming

Mississippi Studios

TUES. DEC. 21 Crown Room

See You Next Tuesday Weekly Dubstep Party

Hall of Records Tah Rei

MRS, DJ Beyonda, DJ Trans Fat, IL Camino

Someday Lounge

Star Bar

Ante Up: Doctor Adam, DJ Nature, Ronin Roc

Someday Incubator DJ Smooth Hopperator

Tiga

DJ Avant to Party

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

PERFORMANCE

DEC. 15-21

= WW Pick. Highly recommended. Most prices listed are for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply, so it’s best to call ahead. Editor: BEN WATERHOUSE. Stage: BEN WATERHOUSE (bwaterhouse@wweek. com). Classical: BRETT CAMPBELL (bcampbell@wweek.com). Dance: HEATHER WISNER (dance@wweek.com). TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit information at least two weeks in advance to: bwaterhouse@wweek.com.

STAGE

The Faerie’s Gift

1945 Christmas From Home

Tapestry Theatre completes its cycle of World War II radio variety show. Lewis & Clark College, 0615 SW Palatine Road, 245-6919. 7:30 pm Friday and Saturday, 2 pm Sunday, Dec. 17-19. $19$22, $11 veterans.

Annie

The one and only, performed for your enjoyment by Northwest Children’s Theater. NW Neighborhood Cultural Center, 1819 NW Everett St., 222-4480. 7 pm Thursdays-Fridays, 2 and 7 pm Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays and Dec. 31; 2 and 7 pm Dec. 21-23, 28-30 and Jan. 2. No show Dec. 24-25. $13-$22.

The Best Christmas Pageant Ever

Lakewood reprises its annual holiday treat. Lakewood Center for the Arts, 368 S State St., Lake Oswego, 6353901. 7:30 pm Wednesday-Wednesday, Dec. 15-22; also 2 pm Saturday-Sunday, Dec. 18-19. $12-$14.

A Christmas Story

Portland Center Stage has set itself a big challenge in unwrapping this charming Christmas present for the live stage. Unfortunately, Philip Grecian’s stolid adaptation of the 1983 film manages to suck much of the nostalgic holiday cheer out of this story of BB gun mania. The biggest problem? There are two Ralphie Parkers. While the film overlays its wry adult narration on kid Ralphie’s cherubic face, PCS’s version forces kid actor Michael Cline to share the stage with his grown-up alter ego Darius Pierce, the latter often blandly pontificating over the minutiae of kid life while the former ineffectually mimes the action. That makes for a crowded stage. KELLY CLARKE. Gerding Theater, 128 NW 11th Ave., 445-3700. 7:30 pm Wednesday-Friday, 2 and 7:30 pm Saturday-Sunday. No show Dec. 25. Closes Dec. 26. $33-$63, $18 youth.

Dying City

From the outset, Christopher Shinn’s 2007 drama, directed at Portland Playhouse by Brian Weaver, echoes the familiar form of a whodunit. There is a corpse (Craig, a Faulkner scholar and Army reservist, dead in Iraq), a survivor (Kelly, his wife of two years), an investigator (Craig’s twin brother, Peter, an actor) and a slew of unanswered questions. But as the circumstances surrounding Craig’s demise are gradually revealed, we are left with deeper, more distressing mysteries that will follow us, nagging, into the night. Kelly finds Peter at her door, unannounced and with unclear intentions. A master of passive aggression, he really wants Kelly to read a sheaf of emails his brother sent him from Iraq; emails, he believes, that explain how he died. What follows is a tense 90 minutes of conversational judo, interspersed with flashbacks to Craig’s last night at home. There is one obnoxious gimmick: The brothers are both played by one actor, Wade McCollum, with many costume changes. McCollum pulls off the trick fairly well, but he’s outperformed by Cristi Miles as Kelly, who completely inhabits the role of the damaged, grieving therapist, robbed of husband and motherhood. BEN WATERHOUSE. The Church, 602 NE Prescott St., 205-0715. 9 pm Friday-Saturday, 4 pm Sunday, Dec. 17-19. $12-$21.

Ebenezer Ever After

Stumptown Stages presents a new musical, in which Ebenezer Scrooge journeys to the underworld to free Jacob Marley. Theater! Theatre!, 3430 SE Belmont St., 503-381-8686. 7 pm Thursdays, 7:30 pm Fridays-Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays and Dec. 24. Closes Dec. 24. $30.

Story theater for kids. The Brooklyn Bay, 1825 SE Franklin St., Bay K., 7724005. 10 am Saturday, 2 pm Sunday, Dec. 18-19. $7, children under 2 free.

Hamlet

The latest of Third Rail’s high-def, bigscreen broadcast from the National Theatre features Rory Kinnear in a universally lauded performance as the prince of Denmark. World Trade Center, 121 SW Salmon St., 235-1101. 2 and 7 pm Saturday, Dec. 18. $15-$20.

Killing Time

This “all-new world premiere comedy” from Portland sketch comedy company the 3rd Floor doesn’t do anything nearly so dramatic as the title suggests; rather, it languishes the time away with a lazy silliness that’s all the more frustrating because the show has the potential for something greater. Director and co-writer Tony St. Clair starts off with the year 1948 and Johnny Donovan (John Killeen), a sort of everyman struggling to make it until he’s swept into a whodunit caper of criminal, political, scientific and ultimately familial intrigue, all set off by a time machine. There is a lot of time travel on show; that fact alone will decide whether you want to see it or curse it. There is also punk rock and a surprise appearance by Stephen Hawking. CAITLIN MCCARTHY. Miracle Theatre, 525 SE Stark St., the3rdfloor. com. 8 pm Thursdays-Saturdays, Dec. 16-18. $15-$18.

Mars on Life—Live!

Susannah Mars, everyone’s favorite soccer-mom chanteuse, revives her delightful holiday revue at Artists Rep. Artists Repertory Theatre, 1515 SW Morrison St., 241-1278. 7:30 pm Wednesday-Thursday, Dec. 15-16, 2 and 7:30 pm Sunday, Dec. 19. $25-$47.

Money Puppet Slam

Beady Little Eyes’ monthly puppettheater showdown takes on the theme of money. Someday Lounge, 125 NW 5th Ave., 248-1030. 7 pm Saturday, Dec. 18. $8, $7 with a can of food for the Oregon Food Bank. 21+.

Queer Christmas

A variety show featuring DJ Hufnstuf, DJ Lunchlady, Fannie Mae Darling and more. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 9 pm Monday, Dec. 20. Free. 21+.

The Santaland Diaries

Wade McCollum reprises his performance of this stage adaptation of David Sedaris’ memoir of a miserable season spent at Macy’s Santaland. Gerding Theater, 128 NW 11th Ave., 445-3700. 7:30 pm Tuesdays-Fridays, 2 pm Saturdays-Sundays, 10 pm Thursdays Dec. 9-30, 5 pm Dec. 31. No shows Dec. 25 or Jan. 1. $30-$50.

The Shoemaker and the Elves

Tears of Joy Theatre presents a puppetry retelling of the Grimm tale. Winningstad Theatre, Portland Center for the Performing Arts, 1111 SW Broadway, 248-4335. 7:30 pm Friday, 11 am and 1 pm Saturday, 2 and 4 pm Sunday. $15-$18.

Soph: An Evening With the Last of the Red-Hot Mamas

Wendy Westerwelle reprises her hit 1984 performance as Sophie Tucker, a ribald turn-of-the-century vaudeville star, for Triangle Productions. While Westerwelle may tire more quickly than she used to, she’s still got a great brassy voice and can tell the hell out of a dirty joke. Her delivery of big comedy numbers like “Mr. Siegel” and “I’m Living Alone and I Like It” is delightful. BEN WATERHOUSE. The CoHo Theater, 2257 NW Raleigh St., 239-5919. 7:30 pm Thursdays-

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays. No show Dec. 25. Closes Dec. 26. $15-$35.

The Trial of Ebenezer Scrooge

A world premiere Christmas tale from Bag & Baggage Productions, in which Scrooge sues the ghosts for breaking and entering. The Venetian Theatre, 253 E Main St., Hillsboro, 345-9590. 7:30 pm Wednesdays-Saturdays and Tuesday, Dec. 21; 2 pm Sundays. Closes Dec. 23. $16-$23.

A Tuna Christmas

[NEW REVIEW] Frito pie, Baptists and delicious small-town gossip embellish this hilarious, feel-good gem of a holiday show. Master comedians Jeffrey Gilpin and Alan King play all 24 townsfolk of Tuna, Texas, ranging from Aunt Pearl Burras to Sheriff Buford Givens, with the help of speedy and seamless costume changes. Major kudos goes to the behind-the-scene tech crew for convincingly transforming two talented men into old grandmas, teenage boys, flirty waitresses and more, complete with decent Texas drawls. The show’s plot is ordinary— the day before Christmas, the town pulls together to cope with the usual holiday mini-disasters, as well as find the mysterious Christmas phantom— but the richness of the characters makes Tuna extraordinary. The eccentric citizens of this podunk west Texas town are as real as your weirdest relatives; and since you don’t have to spend the holidays with them, it’s all right if you can’t stop laughing. STACY BROWNHILL Winningstad Theatre, Portland Center for the Performing Arts, 1111 SW Broadway., 248-4335. 7:30 pm Dec. 14-16 and 18-23. $15$53.85.

The Two Gentlemen of Verona

Northwest Classical Theatre presents Shakespeare’s weakest comedy. Shoe Box Theater, 2110 SE 10th Ave., 971244-3740. 7 pm Thursdays-Saturdays, 2 and 7 pm Sundays. No shows Dec. 24-25. Closes Jan. 9. $15-$18.

Why Torture is Wrong, and the People Who Love Them

Portland Actors Conservatory presents a brave and disturbing comedy on torture and post-9/11 paranoia written by absurdist playwright Christopher Durang. Jessica Anselmo (Felicity) and Sam DeRoest (Zamir) appear, in bed, as a newlywed couple facing pressing post-marital issues: Felicity can’t recall the wedding and Zamir might be a terrorist. Temper tantrums, torture, porn schemes, Hooters and a shadow government ensue, in a play that blends the normal and absurd, beginning and end, with a bold sense of humor that usually works. The Loony Tunes score reminds the audience not to take anything onstage too seriously, and keeps us questioning reality. “I don’t know what normal is; that’s why I go to the theater!” appeals Sarah Lucht, who does a stunning version of a wife on the edge of a nervous breakdown. Those of you asking, “What’s real anymore?” after the recent nonbombing of Pioneer Square will want to see this one. STACY BROWNHILL. Portland Actors Conservatory, 1436 SW Montgomery St., 274-1717. 7:30 pm Thursday-Saturday, 2 pm Sunday, Dec. 16-19. $13-$25.

ZooZoo

Imago pulls together favorite scenes from the company’s two puppet/ pantomime/mask shows, Frogz and Biglittlethings, for a tour-friendly bundle of surprising visual delights that runs a little over an hour. Glowing eyes wobble in the darkness, polar bears molest the audience, rabbits attempt to hitchhike, a giant paper bag takes on a life of its own, penguins play musical chairs, and ninjas in red velvet pajamas have a paper fight. Go for a matinee, and the kids in attendance will teach you how to really enjoy a day at the theater. BEN WATERHOUSE. Imago Theatre, 17 SE 8th Ave., 231-3959. 7 pm Fridays, 2 and 7 pm Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays Dec. 15-19; 2 pm Sundays-Tuesdays and Thursdays, 7 pm Wednesdays Dec. 21-Jan.2. No show Christmas and New Year’s Eve. $29, $25 students, $16 under age 16.

COMEDY Hari Kondabolu

Kondabolu is laughing at your expense, white guy, and you’ll be laughing right along. Also, vegan jokes and recordsnob jokes. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., curiouscomedy.org. 8 pm Wednesday, Dec. 15. $10-$12.

Laughterglow

Standup from Seattle’s wonderfully acerbic Alysia Wood, plus Lisa Myers, Gabe Dinger, Christian Ricketts and Bri Pruett, hosted by Whitney Streed. Weird Bar, 3701 SE Division St., 2368689. 9 pm Thursday, Dec. 16. $5. 21+.

The Standup Comedy Showcase

The Brody Theater hosts local standup comics. The Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 224-2227. 10 pm Fridays. Closes Dec. 17. $7-$10.

The Tashi Jones Christmas Special

An improvised train wreck of a live holiday variety show, featuring an elf, a creepy storyteller and the like. The Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 2242227. 8 pm Friday-Saturday, 7 pm Sunday Dec. 17-19. $7-$10.

CLASSICAL Choral Arts Ensemble

The annual holiday concert covers repertoire from the past half-millennium, ranging from ancient Greece, Renaissance Germany and England to 20th-century Russia and Portland, represented by native son Morten Lauridsen’s gorgeous Mid-Winter Songs. First Unitarian Church, 1011 SW 12th Ave., 488-3834. 7:30 pm Saturday, 3 pm Sunday, Dec. 18-19. $10-$18.

David Friesen

The internationally acclaimed jazz bassist has been presenting Christmas concerts of inventive, improvised takes on holiday tunes for the past 35 years. This year’s lineup features pianist Dan Gaynor, saxers Tim Willcox and Rob Davis and drummer Charlie Doggett. Multiple locations, Woodstock Wine & Deli, 4030 SE Woodstock Blvd., 777-2208, 8 pm Saturday. O’Connors Vault, 7850 SW Capitol Highway, 2441690, 8:30 pm Tuesday. Westminster Presbyterian Church, 1624 NE Hancock St., 287-1289, 8 pm Sunday. Free.

Ectopia Brass Ensemble

This concert, featuring some of the

CD REVIEW

A DECEMBER FEAST (IN MULIERIBUS) ’Tis the season of overfamiliar musical comfort food, so this unusual repast from one of the Northwest’s premier vocal ensembles, the allwomen early music group In Mulieribus (“amongst women”), is even more welcome than usual. The last millennium contains more 12th-month music than the carols you hear at the mall and, too frequently, the concert hall. The splendid sounds on the group’s glorious new CD, A December An ethereal antidote to Christmas Feast ($15), all associated schmaltz. with December liturgical feasts on the Christian calendar, range from 13th-century works to music by contemporary composers Maurice Duruflé, Peter Maxwell Davies and Portland’s John Vergin. Half the tracks originated in the 15th century or earlier, including the most substantial: shimmering “Sederunt Principes,” by the great 12th-century composer Perotin, whose mesmerizing organum technique creates a rich tapestry of interweaving vocal lines. It’s probably the most beautiful sound you will hear this season. Many early music groups excel at a single style, but In Mulieribus floats through ethereal medieval and modern works as expertly as it soars over more exuberant music by the great Renaissance composers Palestrina and Tomás Luis de Victoria, and a full-throated “Personent Hodie” adeptly arranged by Craig Kingsbury. The reverberant acoustics of Portland’s St. Stephens Cathedral, where the album was recorded in 2009, produce a serene, echoey sound that, thanks to the group’s precision and smart choices by director Anna Song, never lapses into blurriness or gooeyness. Unlike some groups that strive for a uniform blend that sometimes descends into mashed-potato blandness, Song so adroitly balances the voices that we can bask in their rich harmonies while at the same time hearing each distinctive voice clearly. While you’re unlikely to have heard much of this music before, you’ll certainly appreciate its stirring, comforting beauty. It’s the musical equivalent of a hot toddy, ideal for a season that makes us crave musical warmth with a little kick. The group will sing some of this material, along with much more music from medieval monasteries, Renaissance cathedrals, and even the 20th century, plus some traditional European carols, in concert next Tuesday. It’ll be the best classical concert of the season. BRETT CAMPBELL. SEE IT: 7:30 pm Tuesday, Dec. 21, at St. Mary’s Cathedral, 1716 NW Davis St., 283-2913. $12-$20 at boxofficetickets.com.

DEC. 15-21 stars of the Portland metal (classical category) scene, including members of the Oregon Symphony, Portland Chamber Orchestra, and the Portland Opera and Ballet orchestras, features arrangements of Christmas tunes English conductor John Rutter made for the Philip Jones Brass Ensemble. First Unitarian Church, 1011 SW 12th Ave., 228-6389. 7:30 pm Friday, Dec. 17. Donation.

Filmusik

The title says it all: Santa vs. Satan. Can the jolly master of elves best the Prince of Darkness? The local cinemusical mavericks this time apply their original live chamber ensemble score (by Galen Huckins), voice actors and sound effects (by Dino De Aelfweald) to a 1959 Mexican holiday film directed by an auteur better known for his wrestling flicks. An orbiting St. Nick, robot reindeer…this is what sacred holidays are all about. Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy Blvd., 281-4215. 10 pm Friday, Dec. 18. $10-$12.

Metropolitan Youth Symphony

Lajos Balogh and others lead tomorrow’s classical and jazz players in holiday concerts. Sunday’s performance features jazz and string ensembles; Monday’s orchestral show, featuring music from Beethoven, Haydn and Leroy Anderson, also stars Oregon Children’s Choir. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 239-4566. 4 pm Sunday, Dec. 19, at Marylhurst University Commons, 17600 Pacific Highway, $5-$10. 7 pm Monday, Dec. 20, at Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall. $12-$35.

Michael Allen Harrison

The pianist presents his 20th annual holiday concert series The Old Church, 1422 SW 11th Ave., 255-0747. 7:30 pm Thursday-Friday and Monday-Thursday, Dec. 16-17 and 20-23; 2, 5 and 8 pm Saturday, Dec. 18 and Friday, Dec. 24; 2 and 5 pm Sunday, Dec. 19; 5 and 8 pm Sunday, Dec. 26. $29.50-$46.50.

PERFORMANCE

DANCE

Oregon Chamber Singers

The small choir performs holiday favorites. St. Stephen’s Episcopal Church, 1432 SW 13th Ave., 223-6424. 3 pm Sunday, Dec. 19. $10.

Brazilian Christmas Dance Party

You’d better be good, or Samba Claus will skip your favela this year. Yes, that’s right—Samba Claus, one of the rumored guests appearing at the delightfully sweaty-sounding Brazilian Christmas Dance Party held at the Wonder this week. Shake off the chill with performances by the Lions of Batucada and Brazilian special guests including Mestre Jorge Alabe, Carlinhos Pandeiro de Ouro, Ana Carla Laidley, Claudinho “Sorriso do Cavaco” Candido and others. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., 284-8686. 9 pm Saturday, Dec. 18. $10-$12.

Oregon Repertory Singers

The choir’s annual holiday event is always worth hearing, but even more so this year. Long-time artistic director Gil Seeley has composed a new piece, Wonder Tidings, for this concert, which also features excerpts from Benjamin Britten’s lovely Ceremony of Carols and other holiday fare. St. Mary’s Cathedral, 1716 NW Davis St., 230-0652. 8 pm Friday-Saturday, 2 pm Sunday, Dec. 17-19. $10-$30.

Oregon Symphony, Portland Symphonic Choir

Holiday Hafla

It’s Holiday Hafla time, but just what is a hafla, exactly? In belly-dance parlance, it’s a party, and in this case, it’s an opportunity for belly dancers ranging from seasoned pros to absolute beginners to show their stuff. Euphoria Studios, 1235 SE Division St., 230-7784. 8 pm Saturday, Dec. 18. $8.

Another day, another Messiah. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 228-1353. 7:30 pm Saturday, 2 pm Sunday, Dec. 18-19. $25-$95.

Portland Cello Project, Corin Tucker, Golden Bears, Typhoon, PHAME Academy Choir

Northwest Dance Project

With musical forces matching its expanding ambitions, the local cellisti augment their eight strings with wind and brass sections, percussion and a chorus of developmentally disabled adults, plus indie-rock collaborators, in music by Britten, Kraftwerk and Tune-Yards. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 225-0047. 8 pm Friday, Dec. 17. $15-$18.

Jazz is the thread tying together the dances at Northwest Dance Project’s Cool Yule show; specifically, jazz from Portland’s Blue Cranes, who will see their work take shape (literally) as they play live. The choreographers on the bill have set new pieces to Cranes compositions: Carla Mann followed the jazz impulse for improvisation in a duet set to “Crane,” Minh Tran chose “Ritchie Bros.” for his twin duets, and company member Andrea Parson’s avant-garde ensemble number was inspired by the Sufjan Stevens cover “Seven Swans.” NWDP artistic director Sarah Slipper has crafted a malefemale duet to “Crane Reprise”; Kemba Shannon made what she has dubbed a “high-energy, jazzy snazzy” ensemble work against “Returning to Portland”; and to “Maddie Mae,” Tracey Durbin offers a lyrical jazz solo. Northwest

Singalong Messiah

Local pianist Michael Barnes accompanies and church choir director Carol Stewart-Smith conducts Handel’s inevitable oratorio. Bring your own score if you have one. Donations benefit Neighborhood House, a social-service agency for low-income kids. St. Mark Presbyterian Church, 9750 SW Terwilliger Blvd., 244-8177. 7 pm Monday, Dec. 20. Donation.

SANTA VS. SATAN Dance Project Studio & Performance Center, 833 N Shaver St., 421-7434. 7 pm Thursday, 7 and 9 pm FridaySaturday, Dec. 16-18. $33-$50.

Portland Festival Ballet

Former Joffrey Ballet instructor John Magnus brings new choreography, sets and costumes to Portland Festival Ballet’s 2010 production of The Nutcracker. Arts & Communication Magnet Academy Performing Arts Center, 11375 SW Center St., Beaverton, 7 pm Saturday, 1 and 5 pm Sunday, 2 and 7 pm Monday-Wednesday, Dec. 18-22. $10-$24. All ages.

Rosehip Revue

The Rosehip Revue celebrates its first birthday with a boffo lineup of West Coast performers, a raffle and burlesque-themed drink specials. (The mind reels!) Among the regulars, we have “pop ’n’ lock princess” Angelique DeVil, the boyish twosome Burlesquire, singer Cherry Valance, Rose City Siren Delilah Sinn, and Swingteaser

Euphemia Fox, plus Salem’s Nina Nightshade. From San Francisco, it’s Fannie Fuller, while Seattle is sending Sinner Saint Burlesque’s Jesse BelleJones. Erickson Saloon, 9 NW 2nd St., 9:30 pm Friday, Dec. 17. $13. 21+.

Znama Dance Company and Soulfire Belly Dance Troupe

Think of them as musical mutts: Underscore Orkestra’s oeuvre combines Balkan, klezmer, Gypsy Jazz and swing music, both traditional and original. They and Opa Groupa (which throws Middle Eastern influences into the mix) play live on a potentially very lively bill that also features dance performances by the Soulfire Belly Dance Troupe and Znama Dance Company, which weaves together belly dance, flamenco, tango, can-can and more. Someday Lounge, 125 NW 5th Ave., 248-1030. 9 pm Friday, Dec. 17. $7.

For more Performance listings, visit

LET MUSIC BRIGHTEN YOUR HOLIDAY CELEBRATIONS! • Carols & Christmas Songs Bryn Terfel-Baritone Sale $14.99 CD

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Sting

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Sting

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• Julia Fischer-Violin & Piano Grieg-Piano Concerto Saint-Saens: Violin Concerto # 3 Sale $24.99 DVD

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Live in Berlin Sale $19.99 CD/DVD Sale $19.99 Blu-ray

ON SALE

THROUGH DECEMBER 31ST. Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

VISUAL ARTS

DEC. 15-21

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

tay l o r s c h e f s t ro m

By RICHARD SPEER. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit show information—including opening and closing dates, gallery address and phone number—at least two weeks in advance to: Visual Arts, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: rspeer@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115. Emailed press releases must be backed up by a faxed or printed copy.

Torben Eskerod

For his series Campo Verano, Danish photographer Torben Eskerod traveled to Rome, Italy, and hung out for weeks in the Eternal City’s oldest cemetery. He was intrigued by the antique, glass-encased portraits on many of the gravestones, showing likenesses of those below, when they were in the primes of their lives. Eskerod photographed these photographs, which are in varied states of preservation. Many are molded, wrinkled, cracked, sun-blanched and otherwise eaten away by the effects of time and exposure. Intended as permanent remembrances of the deceased, the portraits have become poignant, borderline gruesome mirrors of the decay in progress in the coffins underground. This is a beautifully melancholy show not to be missed. Blue Sky, 122 NW 8th Ave., 225-0210. Closes Jan. 2.

Corey Arnold

Corey Arnold owns a fishing boat and takes photos of his crew members catching and gutting fish, crabs, and all manner of other marine life on the high seas. He’s at his strongest not as a documentarian but when he allows the human and ichthyological players to stand (or swim) in for the fearsome symbolisms of our common struggle against nature and death. In his latest body of work, Fish-Work Europe, he leaves the cold waters off Alaska, where he normally works, to explore the fishing industry in eight European countries. Charles A. Hartman Fine Art, 134 NW 8th Ave., 287-3886. Closes Jan. 15.

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Baku Maeda

TORBEN ESKEROD AT BLUE SKY

NOW SHOWING Stu Levy, Sara Siestreem

With intuition and invention, photographer Stu Levy subdivides his images into multiple frames to create collage-like wholes. Whether in wall-spanning monumental pieces or intimate psychological portraits such as Walter Chappell, he invigorates the eye while engaging the emotions. In the back-gallery group show, Sara Siestreem leaves her symbolist style behind in favor of self-assured abstraction. The bold, blue-and-red gestures of By Levitation or Ladder suggest that the artist is equally confident across a wide range of formal approaches. Augen DeSoto, 716 NW Davis St., 546-5056. Closes Dec. 30.

Resonance

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Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

Among the highlights in the group show Resonance are Carole Meyer’s mazelike gold squiggles on gold background. In abstract paintings such as City of Light, the artist is onto a fertile conceit, although the irregularity of her compositions need more rhythm and rigor to rise above what now appears merely as messiness. In Alexis Mollomo’s haunting Ted and His Brother, the narrative painter depicts convicted “Unabomber” Ted Kaczynski as a child, standing alongside his brother, David, who in 1996 turned Kaczynski in to the F.B.I. In the painting, a ghostly female figure runs, terrified, from the children, her mouth open in a scream out of Munch. Nearby, the staircase of a bomb shelter descends into the ground, aglow with flames, as if leading into the pit of hell. To see two brothers in all their freckle-faced, gap-toothed insouciance juxtaposed with visions of how time and circumstance would affect their relationship, is an affecting demonstration of Mollomo’s gift

for unnerving psychological insight. Finally, painter Tamara English moves beyond her messy vegetal weed gardens toward a more compositionally focused style. In Breath V, she juxtaposes floral patterns with decorative flourishes drawn from her travels to Turkey. It is refreshing to see her luxuriantly goopy surfaces tempered by compositional rigor. ANKA, 325 NW 6th Ave., 224-5721. Closes Dec. 26.

Joel Frank

In the midst of a largely middling group show by arts collective Flight 64, Joel Frank’s drawings and watercolors stand out. His untitled drawings of female nudes show a facility and polish with human anatomy and movement. His models, although seemingly stationary, betray a potential for kinetic energy that is palpable. Moreover, even though the nudes are depicted with classical restraint, Frank clearly has a sense of play and exuberance, which comes through in the jiggly sensuousness of his Rubenesque figures. Backspace, 115 NW 5th Ave., 2482900. Closes Dec. 31.

Mario Caoile, Kanetaka Ikeda

Applying paint straight out of the tube, Mario Caoile has an eye for graffiti-influenced composition but an unfortunate sloppiness of execution. The incongruous sculptural protrusions affixed to his canvases and panels impart a junky, arbitrary appearance. Meanwhile, in the complementary exhibition, Tree of Life, Kanetaka Ikeda lines the wall with bizarre sculptural wooden heads, which unintentionally evoke the shrunken heads of the historic South Seas and Amazon Basin. An installation of the heads is piled with wood branches in the middle of the gallery, as if inviting a bonfire. Blackfish, 420 NW 9th Ave., 2242634. Closes Dec. 31.

Japanese mixed-media artist Baku Maeda borrows from sculptural and origami traditions in his folded-ribbon works, presented in elegant shadowboxes. With wit, pluck and invention, the artist painstakingly cuts and folds multicolored rayon ribbons into the shapes of animals: a bear, a fox, dog, lion, reindeer and birds. Like the best of contemporary Japanese art, so influenced by the anime movement, this body of work is cute but not cutesy, clever but not precious. It is a fine line, which Maeda finesses with charm and humor. Compound, 107 NW 5th Ave., 7962733. Closes Dec. 31.

Gwashi!, Gabriel Manca, Kris Hargis

The manga show Gwashi! is dually overshadowed by artwork by two other artists. Gabriel Manca’s hokey shadowboxes would have done well in the folk-heavy Art in the Pearl festival but are cringe-worthy in this setting. Kris Hargis’ suite of works on paper, however, redeems the exhibition. In these mixed-media drawings, he departs from the morose self-portraits he normally favors. The convoluted but ravishing imagery in Apple, Amaryllis, and Potato and the haunting female nude in Legs Crossed show an accomplished drawer excelling in economical but emotionally potent visual sonnets. Froelick, 714 NW Davis St., 222-1142. Closes Jan. 15.

G. Lewis Clevenger

Trading his signature grids for curvilinearity, G. Lewis Clevenger brazenly and successfully evolves his abstract paintings. The large forms in Sullivan’s Gulch and the droll loops in Louie’s Swag feature the excavated underpainting the artist does so well. However, there are passages in the lower left- and right-hand corners of his work The Recipe which are unnuanced, flat and amateur-looking. This tactic is worthy of caution. In his quest for artistic evolution, Clevenger should make sure not to throw the baby out with the bathwater. Pulliam, 929 NW Flanders St., 228-6665. Closes Dec. 30.

For more Visual Arts listings, visit

WORDS

DEC. 15-21

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

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By LEIGHTON COSSEBOOM. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit lecture or reading information at least two weeks in advance to: WORDS, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: words@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

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Renaissance Bookshop, 1338 NW 23rd Ave., 224-4929. 7 pm. $12.

Barry Gifford, Willy Vlautin and Jim Nisbet

Write Around Portland

Searching for wisdom among street hustlers, fast women, “alien abductees, and schoolyard nudists” can prove to be a challenging endeavor. From the mind of Wild at Heart scribe Barry Gifford, Sad Stories of the Death of Kings is a compilation of short stories that are mixtures of “memoir and fiction.” The stories follow Roy, a fatherless aspiring writer, trying to grow up in the midst of a chaotic postwar Chicago. Joining Gifford are fellow writers Willy Vlautin (Richmond Fontaine’s frontman, Portland horse-racing aficionado and creator of the spoken-word CD A Jockey’s Christmas) and Jim Nisbet (A Memory of Doubt). Each author will share a “dark Christmas story of their choosing.” Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 228-4651. 7:30 pm. Free.

THURSDAY, DEC. 16 Chris Guillebeau

If you’re caught in a rut, hate your job, or just want to break out of your normal life in general, you may want to consult The Art of Non-Conformity. In his nontraditional self-help book, Chris Guillebeau explains how we all can determine what we want out of life by “exploring creative self-employment, radical goal-setting, contrarian travel, and embracing life as a constant adventure.” Guillebeau preaches the idea that your “competence is your security” and with it you can achieve your own form of world domination, while also making the world a better place. If you’re desperate to change the path you’re on, but don’t want to conform to Rhonda Byrne’s The Secret and The Power, this reading may change your life. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 228-4651. Free.

FRIDAY, DEC. 17 Carl Johan Calleman

Hopefully you’re able to find yourself in a limo with John Cusack if the Mayans were right about the year 2012. The Mayan Calendar and the Transformation of Consciousness is Carl Johan Calleman’s guide to understanding the highly debated and spiritually controversial ancient timeline. While many interpret 2012 on the Mayan calendar as the year of our global demise, Calleman’s book veers away from foreboding predictions and simply presents the Mayan calendar as a testament to our history thus far. Calleman will articulate these difficult concepts in his lecture, “Transformation to Unity Consciousness: An Overview of the Mayan Calendar.” New

Come share and appreciate personal true stories during Write Around Portland’s 34th anthology release, Look Out on Your City/ Mira Tu Ciudad. It includes writing from all kinds of locals, including “transgender adults, burn survivors, adults living with mental illness, youth at an alternative high school, sexual assault survivors and low-income housing residents.” The event is an opportunity to support local writers as well as celebrate the fall 2010 Write Around Portland workshop. Anthologies will be sold for $12 and child care is available at the event. First United Methodist Church, 1838 SW Jefferson St., 234-4077. 6:30 pm. Free, but donations are accepted.

SATURDAY, DEC. 18 Eric Kimmel

If you’re saving ’Twas the Night Before Christmas for Christmas Eve, and you’re thinking that How the Grinch Stole Christmas might inspire your children to rob people when they get older, then perhaps a Ukrainian folktale is the way to go. Local author Eric Kimmel’s retelling of A Spider’s Gift: A Ukrainian Christmas Story is a children’s book that follows Katrusya, a poor girl who wants nothing more than a tree for her family’s home this Christmas. When she brings home the “perfect evergreen,” Katrusya learns that it’s infested with spiders, but her good nature drives her to harbor them for the holidays. The spiders then rally together to magically repay her family with silver and gold. “After the reading, kids will get to make a spider-web holiday ornament for free!” Green Bean Books, 1600 NE Alberta St., 954-2354. 2 pm. Free.

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Lullabies & Carols for Christmas Monica Whicher-Soprano Judy Loman-Harp

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Franz Schmidt-Symphony # 4, Variations on a Hussar’s Song Vassily Sinaisky-Malmo Symphony Orchestra

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SUNDAY, DEC. 19 Publication Fair

It’s finally time for the print publishers of Portland to unveil what they have been working on this year at Publication Studio’s annual holiday Publication Fair. The Studio prints and binds books, circulates texts and provides forums and spaces for public discourse about its literature. As of now, the local works featured in the fair include Peaches and Bats, Octopus Books and Nudity in Groups. Attendees will get their chance to view “Portland’s innovative, globe-trotting, awesome publication projects all in one room.” The Cleaners, 403 SW 10th Ave., 11 am-8 pm. Free.

The Art of Sound Jose Serebrier conducts the music of Ned Rorem

Sale $24.95 5 CD set

Shostakovich-Symphony # 10 Vasily Petrenko-Royal Liverpool Philharmonic Orchestra

Sale $7.99 CD

For more Words listings, visit

ON SALE THROUGH JANUARY 10TH Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

“OUTRAGEOUSLY FUNNY!”

Give Local. Give Craft. Jason Russell, Bowl and Tumblers, ceramic earthenware, $26–50. Photo: Matthew Miller.

-Peter Travers, ROLLING STONE

Felted accessories. Crocheted metal. Sculpted glass. Botanical jewelry. Artist-mixed glazes. Everyday sculptures. Structural ceramics.

“A NERVY COMEDY! MR. CARREY HAS RARELY BEEN MORE-Stephen CHARISMATIC ON THE SCREEN!” Holden, THE NEW YORK TIMES

These are a few of our favorite things.

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TRON: LEGACY

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Nothing jars Hollywood into action like the threat of squandered profits. So the studios, recognizing that Christmas falls on a Saturday—thus reducing precious holiday matinee hours—have begun launching their biggest presents into the multiplexes. Before you carve that pig, check out these hams. Tron: Legacy 73 Video games have come a long way since Tron hit screens in 1982, and Tron: Legacy has evolved with them. It’s eye-poppingly gorgeous, ludicrous and swollen with enough pure adrenaline to make Raoul Duke trip balls for decades. Legacy finds computer wunderkind Sam Flynn (Garrett Hedlund) sucked into a digitized world of violent Ultimate Frisbee and glow sticks to retrieve his long-lost father, Kevin (Jeff Bridges). The fallen Apollo of the neon realm, Kevin’s now hiding from the maniacally dictatorial Clu (Bridges again, age digitally reduced 30 years to resemble Patrick Swayze by way of The Polar Express). They must escape with the world’s hottest computer program (Olivia Wilde) in order to save the Tron world and our own. Aesthetically, Tron is a wonder, maybe the best use of 3-D to date. Set to a pulsing Daft Punk score, action scenes sear the retina, from gladiatorial battles to a kung-fu melee in a Eurotrash bar and the requisite Light Cycle throwdown. Neon dominates the film, with glowing lights augmenting women’s curves and men’s muscles with ample ooh-la-la and phosphorescence permeating each shot. With so much style, who gives a shit about substance? Director Joseph Kosinski, for one. The film is packed with enough broody exposition and religious allegory to give both Wachowskis migraines. Too much time is spent on a story that should be relegated to second-player status. Tron: Legacy misses only one thing that gives video games endless replay value: When Call of Duty gets dull, at least you can press a button to skip the plot and jump right to blowing shit up. PG. AP KRYZA. Opens Friday in 3-D at

Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Cinema 99, Cinetopia, City Center, Cornelius, Division, Evergreen, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Roseway, Sandy, Sherwood, Tigard and Wilsonville. Opens in 2-D at Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Cornelius, Division, Evergreen, Lloyd Mall, Movies on TV, Oak Grove and St. Johns Twin Cinema-Pub. The Fighter 89 The true story of Lowell, Mass., boxing half brothers Micky and Dicky, played by Mark Wahlberg and Christian Bale—no, no, c’mon, pick the paper back up! The Fighter deserves its shot: Director David O. Russell (Three Kings, I Heart Huckabees) announces his intention from the opening bell to out-Scorsese Scorsese with sprinting cameras, Stones songs and charismatic fuck-ups. But the movie is noteworthy for the between-the-ropes relatives it doesn’t ape: There’s none of the Irish sentimentality of Million Dollar Baby, and none of The Wrestler’s langourous selfpity. Fleeing formula like Bale’s Dicky runs from cops, the movie is messy and darting and alive. In a film of gorgeously composed shots, Russell’s best trick is to make the fight scenes look exactly like HBO broadcasts—every DV shot halogen-bleached and chaotic. For once, boxing looks like an ugly, painful sport. Wahlberg plays Micky intriguingly passive and speechless—though it’s hard to imagine any man getting a word in around this bevy of chain-smoking sisters and an exploitative-manager mother played by Melissa Leo. (As his girlfriend, Amy Adams goes downmarket and fierce— and somehow manages to emerge even more adorable.) But the movie belongs to Bale: I had come to suspect he could no longer attempt any role without the Batman scowl as a crutch, but as The Fighter’s drug-addict older sibling, he hops like a wallaby, breaks into off-key crooning, and generally suggests Anthony Perkins on crack. In the movie’s singular scene, he serenades his disappointed mother with the Bee Gees’ “I Started a Joke,” and, as she begins to sing along, the duet is a reminder that family so often endures on the reassuring lies we tell each other. The Fighter doesn’t steal the championship belt from Raging Bull: It’s a hair too neat, and doesn’t fully explore its darkest implications. But at least it belongs in the same ring. R. AARON MESH. Opens Friday at Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Cinema 99, CineMagic, Cinetopia,

THE TEMPEST

City Center, Cornelius, Division, Evergreen, Fox Tower, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Oak Grove, Sandy, Sherwood, Tigard and Wilsonville. The Tempest Stage and opera staple Julie Taymor, creator of 65 Broadway’s The Lion King and the new Spider-Man musical, has always been an insanely talented costume designer and art director with delusions of directing grandeur. In the past, she’s managed to balance her inventive visions with solid plotting on film, especially in her vivid, fantastical biopic of Frida Kahlo, Frida, but often her work ends up more like the off-key Beatles massacre Across the Universe. The Tempest, which sets Shakespeare’s tale of shipwrecks and double-crossing nobles on a volcanic isle lorded over by a gender-bending, magic-staff-wielding Prospero (Helen Mirren as “Prospera”), falls somewhere in between. The Tempest is neither the Bard’s most affecting nor action-packed tale (three bands of travelers stumble around while Prospera plays puppetmaster). Taymor ups the interest with a panoply of amazing creatures, from fiery-eyed lava dogs and a naked, androgynous butoh sprite to a goo-mouthed harpy that bedevils Prospera’s evil brother and his compatriots, looking like the world’s most terrifying seagull after an oil spill disaster. But while the visuals sing, and the zipper-and-leather outfits dazzle, the emotional content lags. For a lover, Prospera’s daughter Miranda (Felicity Jones) must make do with a simpering American Apparel ad that croons folk tunes, and you’d be forgiven for focusing on the rugged scenery, all razorsharp rocks and gnarled trees, while drunken shipmates Alfred Molina and Russell Brand trade barbs. Like most Taymor productions, The Tempest is truly amazing eye candy. But despite a powerful performance from Mirren herself, these stormy waters don’t run nearly deep enough. PG-13. KELLY CLARKE. Opens Friday at Cinema 21. How Do You Know 34 The real question, properly punctuated: How did Bill Murray know to flee this train wreck before it started shooting? Chalk it up as another lucky dodge in a charmed life. Or maybe he just read the script. Cut from USA Softball, Reese Witherspoon goes to a shrink (Tony Shalhoub), who advises: “Figure out what you want, and learn how to ask for it.” James L. Brooks CONT. on page 46 Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

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wants to remake his Broadcast News without the pesky workplace, and after you win enough Oscars, you always get what you ask for. It really is the same love triangle, but disastrous: Witherspoon has been instructed to impersonate Holly Hunter, Owen Wilson is humiliated in the dimwit beefcake role given poignancy by William Hurt, and Paul Rudd gets drunk on cocktails and sings to his furniture. Rudd really could be the handsome son of Albert Brooks—that would have been fun casting; instead, the devious-pop role intended for Murray goes to a miserable Jack Nicholson. At any rate, Rudd is the most ill-used: He’s a moony milquetoast, because James L. Brooks can’t imagine nice guys with the potential for dignity. How Do You Know is jammed with big, unformed ideas—it concludes with a speech about putty, which is inadvertently telling—and there are bits of good movie sticking out of a lot of very bad movie. But it goes on forever, like some form of romantic purgatory: There’s actually a scene where a man gives a mildly touching marriage proposal, and then somebody realizes they should have videotaped it, so everyone in the room recites the speech a second time. Not since Cameron Crowe’s Elizabethtown has a respected director floundered so publicly, and at such length. PG-13. AARON MESH. Opens Friday at Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Cinema 99, City Center, Cornelius, Division, Evergreen, Lake Twin, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Oak Grove, Pioneer Place, Sandy, Sherwood, Tigard and Wilsonville.

‘THE TEMPEST’ IS STATE OF THE ART JULIE TAYMOR, THAT IS, A STUDY IN THE SPECTACULAR.” REGINA WEINREICH, THE HUFFINGTON POST

“MARVELOUS! THE CAST IS FIRST-RATE. THE BARD’S PICTURESQUE LANGUAGE FLOWS INTO A STORYLINE THAT IS REMARKABLY EASY AND ENJOYABLE TO FOLLOW. YOU DON’T FEEL LIKE YOU’RE LISTENING TO 17TH-CENTURY POETRY; YOU'RE JUST LIVING IT.” STEVEN MARK, STAR ADVERTISER

“HELEN MIRREN IS AT THE PEAK OF HER POWERS. WHEN SHAKESPEARE IS DONE WELL, IT BYPASSES THE BRAIN AND GOES STRAIGHT TO THE HEART.” ROBERT BEAMES, THE TELEGRAPH

“DJIMON HOUNSOU IS TERRIFIC. HELEN MIRREN IS DEFINITELY OSCAR MATERIAL. ®

THE COSTUMES, THE LIGHTING, AND THE PRODUCTION DESIGN ARE SUPERB.” ROGER FRIEDMAN, SHOWBIZ 411

I Love You Phillip Morris 69 Jim Carrey is at his most interesting when he explores a worrisome cavity inside his mania— think of his everyman in The Truman Show suspecting his entire life was as empty as his good-morning waves—so he’s very good as the compulsively recidivist Texas con man Steven Russell, who romances (and tries to spring) a fellow prison inmate. I Love You Phillip Morris (no relation to the coffin-nail manufacturer; the beloved’s name is actually Phillip Morris, true story) could be a sequel to Catch Me If You Can called Please, Somebody Catch Me Already—it’s the tale of a man who comes out of the closet, only to discover he’s only functional in confined spaces he can escape from. He is born to jailbreak. With scenes like Carrey emerging from a car wreck with the bloodied cry, “I’m going to be a fag!” it’s hard to say who the picture can play to: The square community will be appalled, and the movie goes out of its way to piss on gay sensitivities. (Russell’s climactic getaway tactic is

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spectacularly offensive.) The satire, written and directed by the team of Glenn Ficarra and John Requa, is brittle and toxic, like poisoned candy. But a lot of it tastes sweet—check out a montage of Carrey committing insurance fraud by flinging himself down escalators—and as Morris, Ewan McGregor provides a sensitive center. His performance radiates heartbroken sincerity, but it’s impossible to say if Carrey (or the rest of the movie) ever really feels the pledge of the title, or anything at all. R. AARON MESH. Opens Friday at Fox Tower. Yogi Bear Torture is a relative term. I’ve not been 32 waterboarded or stripped naked and thrown in a pyramid of other naked men. Still, watching Yogi Bear was a humiliating experience, from sliding a pair of 3-D glasses awkwardly on top of my existing glasses to seeing Yogi—one of my closest childhood friends—stripped of his stylized ’50s dignity and forced to repeat a single catchphrase ad nauseam: “I’m smarter than the average bear!” I should not be surprised at this kind of stripmining. The corpses of Yogi and Boo Boo have been reanimated many times. This time out, the talking bears—the film’s human characters seem underwhelmed by the prospect of bears who speak English; they are, however, impressed by bears who can water ski—are voiced ably enough by Dan Aykroyd and Justin Timberlake and forced to amble through adventure after joylessly clichéd adventure with nary a nod to the cartoon’s heritage. There’s no angular Hanna-Barbera design aesthetic, no Huckleberry Hound cameo and no endless loop of repeating background scenery during chase scenes. Just bad casting (Tom Cavanagh is a cardboard cutout with nice hair as Ranger Smith), predictable plot twists and a couple of fart jokes. If there’s any style to be salvaged from this wreck—and its lack of style is what hurts this movie most—it’s in the inspired design of Yogi’s various pic-a-nic basket-snatching devices (the airborne “Baskit Snatcher 2000” is downright Da Vinci-esque) and the animated closing credits, both of which look pretty sweet in 3-D. Please don’t mistake that for a recommendation. PG. CASEY JARMAN. Opens Friday in 3-D at Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Cinema 99, Cinetopia, Division, Evergreen, Lloyd Mall, Movies on TV, Sandy and Sherwood. Opens in 2-D at Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, City Center, Cornelius, Division, Evergreen, Lloyd Mall, Movies on TV, Oak Grove, Pioneer Place, Tigard and Wilsonville.

I LOVE YOU PHILLIP MORRIS

DEC. 15-21 = WW Pick. Highly recommended.

NW FILM CENTER

Editor: AARON MESH. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, send screening information at least two weeks in advance to Screen, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: amesh@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

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on higher things. He’s the AbsentMinded Sadist, and Black Swan— with its flayed skin and ominous doppelgängers—is Fight Club with feathers. Unfortunately for Portman, she met Darren Aronofsky at a very typical time in his life. R. AARON MESH. Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, City Center, Fox Tower, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV.

Burlesque

EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF

127 Hours

Danny Boyle’s new movie, 127 Hours, is in keeping with the happy-bummer contradictions he established in Slumdog Millionaire: It is based on the true story of Aron Ralston, a rock climber who in 2003 got his right arm pinned beneath a boulder, was stuck in a Utah canyon for five days, and ultimately survived by amputating his own limb with a dull utility tool. It’s also a reminder that no matter how many other hobbies he undertakes, James Franco is primarily one hell of an actor. He’s very good at communicating not merely pain but annoyance—the crisis has all the frustrations of locking your keys in the car, except instead of his keys it’s his arm. The amputation is about as harrowing as you’d expect, but it’s over reasonably quickly—though not before Boyle deploys his inside-the-arm cam, which somehow isn’t quite so upsetting as the outside-the-arm cam, or the inside-the-Nalgene-bottle-of-urine cam. There are a lot of cams: Boyle still loves the cacophonous montage, and often 127 Hours resembles a Nike commercial more than a drama. R. AARON MESH. Cedar Hills, Bridgeport, Fox Tower. 73

2010 British Advertising Awards NEW

[THREE NIGHTS ONLY] “Some of the most spectacular examples of film art are in the best TV commercials,” lofty couch potato Stanley Kubrick once said in a Rolling Stone interview. “If you could ever tell a story, something with some content, using that kind of visual poetry, you could handle vastly more complex and subtle material.” Notwithstanding his odd ignorance of countless experimental filmmakers telling just such nuanced stories, Kubrick was onto something: Those radically condensed blasts of visual information sponsored by purveyors of toys and tinctures we don’t need frequently make for exhilarating explorations of new cinematic forms and technologies. (They are also a boon for creeps with a thing for talking babies and perverts who think chocolate somehow stimulates a woman’s clitoris.) So what do the latest and greatest works of sugar-water propaganda augur for tomorrow’s cinema? It’s hard to say. Turns out watching commercials for two hours straight is a bit like masturbating 20 times in one day: The assault is pleasing at first (talking fish sticks!), and the warm rhythmic pummeling produces a state of constant climax (butter tastes good!), but the experience quickly blurs into a masochistic hell of overstimulation (a tasteful ad about a woman giving birth to a child conceived during a rape as a landmine explodes in the distance!), until I go blind and my thumb is 31

sore from fast-forwarding and I am ready to kill my mother for a Snickers bar. CHRIS STAMM. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7 pm Wednesday-Thursday, Dec. 15-16. 4 pm Sunday, Dec. 19. NEW

American Mystic

[ONE WEEK ONLY] As if the universe didn’t already have an infinite number of mysteries mankind can’t answer, here’s one more: Why make a documentary about three people exploring alternative faith paths in the United States without a lick of context about what’s happening in the rest of society to drive them—or us—to go outside Americans’ usual options of Christianity, Islam, Judaism or “to hell with it all” agnosticism or atheism? Oh, the trio chosen by filmmaker Alex Mar all seem nice enough as they describe in monotones their personal quests for answers in spiritualism, Native American sundancing and paganism. And they’re certainly earnest—”I guess we just started to daydream about having pagan space,” deadpans Morpheus, the paganist. But at 80 minutes, the film drags on and on with these narrowly personal stories with no broader reach. Our prayers, in this case for deeper questions, go unanswered. HENRY STERN. Clinton Street Theater. 7 and 9 pm Friday-Thursday, Dec. 17-23. 39

Black Swan

53 Darren Aronofsky opens the Christmas movie season with a clammy, upscale horror flick starring Natalie Portman as the dancer whose metamorphosis from “frigid little girl” to ballet queen—complete with the subsuming of a dark twin—is accompanied by madness and molting. So it’s a literalization of Swan Lake, yeah. But previous stagings didn’t include the Black Swan performing hallucinatory cunnilingus on the White Swan. Every one of Aronofsky’s previous works torments a hero who sacrifices him- or herself on the altar of an obsession—usually a lust for the spotlight. Portman’s travails in Black Swan—which include, but are not limited to, bulimia, erotic repression by an overweening stage mother (Barbara Hershey) and the sudden onset of webbed feet— most obviously recall Ellen Burstyn abusing diet pills in delirious preparation for a game-show appearance in Requiem for a Dream. Aronofsky is a dom of a director, getting his jollies by brutalizing his characters. So it is a natural progression that in Black Swan he explicitly denies Portman sexual release. It’s a movie about a girl who will go crazy if she doesn’t come. Cruelty in pop directors is nothing new—Hitchcock abused his actresses, and a nasty streak fuels David Fincher— but Aronofsky delivers pummellings while exhorting us to think

38 If you’re going to make a movie about an entertainment form based on skin, sex and bawdy belly laughs, your film ought to include any of the three. But the new Christina Aguilera comeback vehicle, Burlesque, hides its best assets beneath a leaden plot and enough soft focus to make even Cher look dewy. With fun style cues and choreography cribbed from every movie that ever featured a push-up bra, from Sweet Charity to Showgirls, Burlesque still manages to be a dull, PG-13 tease: Kristen Bell, who usually exudes twinkle-eyed bitchiness, trades her personality for a lace bodystocking to play a drunken, lip-syncing diva. The silver lining of the entire snoozy mess is the fact that Christina Aguilera does indeed have a freakishly great set of pipes. PG13. KELLY CLARKE. Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Cinema 99, City Center, Forest, Fox Tower, Lloyd Mall, Movies on TV.

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader 3-D

20 The third Walden Media attempt at a C.S. Lewis epic (get ready for Shadowlands: 3-D!) is not quite so soul-smothering as the second, but it feels less like a movie than a velvet painting, or one of those Magic Eye posters you find in malls. There are water sprites and dragons, and if you stare at the thing long enough, out pops a giant moray with terrible inflammation of the bowels. Aahh! It’s enough to make you never want to go to the mall again. PG. AARON MESH. 3-D: Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Cinema 99, Cinetopia, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Lloyd Center, Lloyd Mall, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville. 2-D: Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Cinema 99, City Center, Cornelius, Division, Evergreen, Lake Twin, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Oak Grove, Sandy, Sherwood, Tigard, Willsonville.

-Ap Kryza, Willamette Week

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54 Here’s Robert Downey Jr. and Zach Galifianakis in Due Date, which feels like the spiritual equivalent of smashing your funny bone against a door frame, popping a couple Vicodin, then smashing your funny bone again really hard. R. AARON MESH. Broadway, Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Cinema 99, Lloyd Center.

Every Man for Himself

27 [FOUR NIGHTS ONLY, REVIVAL] Virtually every movie he made between 1968 and 2001 is “lesser known,” but Every Man for Himself, which kicked off JeanLuc Godard’s run of slightly more accesible 1980s films, is the deepest of deep cuts, a film that even this ever-more-reluctant-by-the-minute Godard fan knew nothing about. Emmanual Laurent’s wonderful new documentary about Truffaut and Godard, Two in the Wave, puffed just enough wind onto the flickering wick of my J-LG worship to warm me to the idea of 90 minutes with midcareer Godard, and I was even looking forward to reassessing what I’d come to view as perhaps the saddest decline of a major cinematic talent this side of Francis Ford Coppola. I was hoping for a revelation on par with that sunlit moment I realized solo Lindsey Buckingham was nearly as good as anything he did with the Mac, but what I got was Ringo’s Beaucoups of Blues: a stark reminder that the good times died with the 1960s. There are brief flashes of electric-

CONT. on page 48

DAILY: 12:50, 3:00, 5:05, 7:15, 9:40 PM

WWEEKDOTCOM WWEEKDOTCOM WWEEKDOTCOM “‘THE FIGHTER’ IS ‘ROCKY’ PLUS ‘THE BLIND SIDE’ PLUS ‘THE DEPARTED’ BUT IT’S MORE SATISFYING THAN ANY OF THEM BECAUSE OF ITS VIGOR, ITS AFFECTION FOR ALL THESE DAFT SOULS AND ITS SENSE OF HUMOR.” RICHARD CORLISS

OSCILLOSCOPE

Due Date

NEW

“Not since ‘Gremlins’ has a Christmas flick so aptly combined dark overtones with such imagination and abandon. The result is poised to be an instant cult classic.”

3.772 x 2””

WILLAMETTE WEEK WED: 12/15 ALL.REX-A1.1215.WI as

STARTS FRIDAY, DECEMBER 17 AT THEATRES EVERYWHERE

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Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

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SCREEN

DEC. 15-21

ity in this dark study of misogyny, which finds Isabelle Huppert and various other women being bartered and bruised by unfeeling men, but they are as few and far between as enjoyable post-Weekend Godard films. CHRIS STAMM. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7 and 9 pm Friday-Saturday, 5 and 7 pm Sunday, 7 pm Monday, Dec. 17-20.

Fair Game

More left-wing celebrity grand7 standing from studio Participant Media, Fair Game is a tribute to compromised CIA officer Valerie Plame and her diplomat husband Joe Wilson. They are played by Naomi Watts and Sean Penn as weepy victims of the Bush administration’s march to war. PG-13. ALISTAIR ROCKOFF. Fox Tower.

Faster

“THRILLING ENTERTAINMENT!!” M . osé Persico, CTV, MONTREAL

A FLORIAN HENCKEL VON DONNERSMARCK FILM

GK FILMS AND COLUMBIA PICTURES PRESENT IN ASSOCIATION WITH SPYGLASS ENTERTAINMENT A GK FILMS AND BIRNBAUM/BARBER PRODUCTION IN ASSOCIATION WITH STUDIOCANAL JOHNNY DEPP ANGELINA JOLIE “THE TOURIST” MUSIC BY

PAUL BETTANYCOSTUME TIMOTHY DALTON STEVEN BERKOFF RUFUS SEWELL CHRISTIAN DE SICPRODUCTION A CASTINGBY SUSIE FIGGIS JAMES NEWTON HOWARD DESIGNER COLLEEN ATWOOD EDITORS JOE HUTSHING, A.C.E. PATRICIA ROMMEL DESIGNER JON HUTMAN EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR OF PHOTOGRAPHY JOHN SEALE, ASC, ACS PRODUCERS LLOYD PHILLIPS BAHMAN NARAGHI OLIVI ER COURSON RON HALPERN PRODUCED BY GRAHAM KING TIM HEADINGTON ROGER BIRNBAUM GARY BARBER JONATHAN GLICKMAN SCREENPLAY BY FLORIAN HENCKEL VON DONNERSMARCK AND CHRISTOPHER MCQUARRI E AND JULIAN FELLOWES DIRECTED BY FLORIAN HENCKEL VON DONNERSMARCK

43 Pitched as another unrelenting vengeance picture, Faster is jammed with the expected nasty violence, but no real payoffs, and its sentimentality seems pointless: If you’re going to spend the holidays visiting a peep show, you don’t want the proprietors to close the curtains right when you’re about to get off, to tell you about the needy orphans. Until its unsatisfying finish, the movie is a bundle of directorial tics and flourishes, most of them needless. R. AARON MESH. Division, Movies on TV.

The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest

35 Lisbeth Salander, buried alive with a bullet in her brain at the end of The Girl Who Played With Fire, can barely walk when The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest begins. The Girl Who Opened a Can of Worms would have been a more accurate (although considerably less sexy) title: Salander’s injuries have her confined to a hospital bed for the film’s first half, and she is capable of little more than pecking out her autobiography on a cell phone. Maybe they don’t have cans of worms in Sweden. I don’t know. But I must warn you there is very little kicking until the final 15 minutes of this third and final installment of Stieg Larsson’s horrendously popular trilogy, and not one goddamn hornet’s nest in the entire picture. R. CHRIS STAMM. Hollywood Theatre, Living Room Theaters.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS FOR THEATERS AND SHOWTIMES

2" (SAU) 2 D

COL (3.825") X 8" = 16" WED 12/15 PORTLAND WILLAMETTE WEEK

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77 Everybody has tough teenage years, but damn does Harry Potter have issues. Sure, we’ve all dealt with shifty relatives and hormonally imbalanced friends with mean streaks. But we didn’t have the lord of all that is evil breathing down our necks, gigantic snakes trying to eat us, or a crazed government hunting us down in the midst of a genocide attempt on wizard-human lovechildren. Now, we near the end of the road with Deathly Hallows, Part 1, the first half of the final chapter, wherein Harry (Daniel Radcliffe) must get all Frodo on Lord Voldemort (the terrifically menacing Ralph Fiennes) by destroying a series of gems possessing fragments of his soul. PG-13. AP KRYZA. 99 Indoor Twin, Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Cinema 99, Cinetopia, City Center, Cornelius, Division, Evergreen, Lloyd Mall, Movies on TV, Oak Grove, Pioneer Place, Sandy, Sherwood, St. Johns Twin Cinema-Pub, Tigard, Wilsonville. NEW

Hemingway’s Garden of Eden

A new adaptation of Ernest Hemingway’s posthumously published novel. Living Room Theaters.

Love & Other Drugs

42 A cookie-cutter romcom that humps every cliché in the book with the same reckless abandon Jake Gyllenhaal mounts Anne Hathaway behind a dumpster: It’s cheap, it’s emotionless, and it uses explicit sex and comedy to disguise what is essentially a chick flick wrapped in a Trojan, ribbed with bare flesh (for his pleasure) and ready to be tossed in the trash. R. AP KRYZA. Broadway,

Willamette Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 wweek.com

2 COL. X 2 = 4" (SAU)

FILLER AD

SMILE ’TIL IT HURTS: THE UP WITH PEOPLE STORY Cedar Hills, Clackamas, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Lloyd Mall, Sherwood, Tigard.

Megamind

66 Poor Megamind. Its writers must’ve thought they had a really clever idea—”What if we make an animated superhero movie with the villain as the protagonist?”— until Despicable Me came out this summer and became a sleeper hit built on that very conceit. Outside that basic premise, they’re not the same film, but the two will now be inextricably linked until the end of time—or at least until Megamind is completely forgotten, which should happen before this review even appears in print. PG. MATTHEW SINGER. 3-D: Cedar Hills, Eastport. 2-D: 99 Indoor Twin, Clackamas, Cinema 99, Evergreen, Forest, Moreland, Movies on TV, Sherwood. NEW

Mon Oncle

[REVIVAL] Jacques Tati’s gentle, beloved Mr. Hulot comedy, in a new 35 mm print. Hollywood Theatre.

Morning Glory

51 Morning news shows are made tolerable only by the grogginess of a pre-work stupor, and they grow more irritating with each sip of coffee. As such, they’re ripe for skewering, and at times Morning Glory nails the parody while getting at the heart of why people watch this tripe every day. It’s like Broadcast News for teenage girls. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Living Room Theaters.

Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale

There’s something very diabolical about an ancient man who watches children at all times, passing judgment on their behavior before breaking into their homes in the middle of the night. Finnish director Jalmari Helander knows there’s an inherent malice in the Santa Claus myth. He mines it to full effect with Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale, a fantastical horror comedy in which the Fat Man is a sadistic enforcer of morals. Santa— ”not the Coca-Cola Santa,” as one character puts it—is actually a demonic marauder (Per Christian Elletsen) who snatches naughty kids from their beds, replacing them with wicker dolls before chucking them into burlap sacks and carting them off. There is no shortage of irreverent holiday films, but not since Gremlins has a Christmas flick so aptly combined dark overtones with such imagination and abandon. Clocking in at under 90 minutes, Rare Exports is packed with a sense of childlike discovery, nailing the laughs and dread with an overriding sense of innocent curiosity. The result is poised to be an instant cult classic for those who have grown tired of George Bailey and his feelgood brethren. Naughtiness can be its own reward. R. AP KRYZA. Fox Tower. 86

Red

Turns out the AARP Team of Bruce Willis, Morgan Freeman, Helen Mirren and John Malkovich is as con82

trived as The A-Team. Most of the joy in Red (“retired, extremely dangerous”) comes from watching the cast let the ham juice fly. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Clackamas, Movies on TV, Tigard.

Smile ’Til It Hurts: The Up With People Story NEW

81 [THREE DAYS ONLY] Contrary to popular opinion, the blissedout, flower-flucking orgy of future accountants known as “the Sixties” (I put it in quotes so I don’t have to touch the filthy thing) did not die at Mick Jagger’s coked-out feet at Altamont, nor did that menacing idiot midget Manson murder it in the Hollywood Hills. No, the dream died in 1968, when a faction of musically inclined and almost wholly talent-free Crest-clean virgins split from wacko anti-pinko Christian cult MRA (Moral Re-Armament) to form Up With People, a globetrotting horror show of insipid uplift starring dozens of young adults who can be forgiven for not knowing any better, and overseen by a power-obsessed glad-hander named J. Blanton Belk, who seems to have been more interested in forging bonds with his corporate sponsors (GM, Toyota and Halliburton, among others) than actually improving the world in any meaningful way. This is, at least, what I learned from the documentary Smile ‘Til it Hurts, and I am inclined to trust my source, because anything that justifies my resentment of “the Sixties” and every slick, slack-jawed hagiographer fishing its scummy waters is golden in my book. I’m smiling. CHRIS STAMM. Hollywood Theatre. 5 pm Friday, 12:50 and 2:25 pm SaturdaySunday, Dec. 17-19.

The Social Network

It’s fundamentally an Angry Young Man movie—like Room at the Top, except that when Mark Zuckerberg (Jesse Eisenberg) sees a room he’s not allowed in, he has the ability to move the room. Say what you will about screenwriter Aaron Sorkin, who seemingly hits the “like” button on himself daily, but his script recognizes that rage is our culture’s prevailing mood. Even the haves feel themselves to be have-nots. PG-13. AARON MESH. Broadway, Moreland. 94

Strange Powers: Stephin Merritt and the Magnetic Fields

70 Stephin Merritt, bard of the gay bars, writes unforgettable songs and speaks in uncompromising aphorisms. Strange Powers, the new documentary about Merritt and his band the Magnetic Fields, is a Child’s Garden of Caustic Observations. “That’s how I feel about other people’s records,” he says, after dismissing most of 1970s cinema as ugly faux vérité. “I think they’re emphasizing convention over beauty or interest, and I’m usually emphasizing interest and beauty over convention.” The film, directed by Kerthy Fix and recent Portland transplant Gail O’Hara, would probably fall just short of Merritt’s standards: Conventionally structured, Strange Powers neatly consolidates

DEC. 15-21

Tamara Drewe

Stephen Frears (The Grifters, The Queen) makes writing look especially preposterous in the opening minutes of Tamara Drewe, which find the denizens of a British writer’s retreat clacking out inanities on laptops. They are no more dignified in their lives. Everyone in the picture wants something they haven’t got, and everyone is just horrible enough that you’re dying to know what their comeuppance will be. It involves cows. Lots of cows. R. AARON MESH. Hollywood Theatre. 84

viewers to five cute kids on the precipice of academic failure and follows them and their struggling parents as they try to enroll in what they think are better schools. BETH SLOVIC. Living Room Theaters.

Waste Land

81 A record of Brazilian-born, New York-based artist Vik Muniz’s two-year collaboration with a band of trash pickers from Rio’s slums. Wisely avoiding pouring “salt of the earth” bromides into her subjects’ wounds, while sidestepping the paternalistic despair that sometimes sinks Werner Herzog’s documents of similarly stricken communities, director Lucy Walker turns what could have been a mash note to Muniz (who might actually deserve one) into a steady, mostly

unsentimental look at a way of life at a place in time on a damaged planet that still admits of joy. CHRIS STAMM. Living Room Theaters. Living Room Theaters. NEW

The Worriers

[ONE NIGHT ONLY, DIRECTOR ATTENDING] “It means we’ve gotta get back to Powell’s, with every poetry gang in Portland trying to stomp us.” OK, this is a completely unnecessary and kind of charming idea for a remake. Unfortunately, the critic’s screener tried to eat our DVD player. Clinton Street Theater. 7 pm Thursday, Dec. 16.

REVIEW IFC FILMS

11 years of Fields notes (mostly the tale of Merritt leaning on the ballast of keyboardist/saint Claudia Gonson) but hints at music as a kind of firefly jar, collecting feelings until they don’t glow as brightly. It also contains a priceless scene of Merritt cradling the Chihuahua he named after Irving Berlin and chuckling over his lyric notebooks, which include the discarded gender-bending line, “Come on my tits you hot Latin bitch.” AARON MESH. Living Room Theaters.

SCREEN

Tangled

60 Few marketing opportunities are missed in Disney’s update of the Rapunzel fairy tale: The opening ballad sounds like Hannah Montana tween twang; a tiny chameleon sidekick is Happy Meal-ready. But once you accept that the film appears built from a box of Playmobil toys, Tangled is moderately enchanting. PG. AARON MESH. 3-D: Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Evergreen, Lloyd Center. 2-D: Broadway, Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Cinema 99, Cornelius, Division, Lloyd Mall, Movies on TV, Oak Grove, Sandy, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville.

The Tourist

It’s official: Johnny Depp has lost his grasp on reality—or, at least, his grasp on real people. After years of inhabiting fantastical characters with personalities that place no limit on how bizarrely he can play them, in The Tourist he portrays a simple American rube—a Wisconsin community college math professor named Frank—and decides to devoid him of any personality at all. His flat performance tanks a film banking its success completely on the natural fireworks that should exist between Depp and co-star Angelina Jolie. Critics have justifiably bemoaned the shocking lack of chemistry between them, blaming a tepid script that aspires to be a witty romantic thriller in the mold of To Catch a Thief and falls well short. But there is enough there for the actors to salvage if they really wanted to. As the glamorously mysterious Elise, Jolie does what’s expected of her: sashay against the prettily filmed backdrop of Venice while looking like, well, Angelina Jolie on vacation in Italy. Frank is the one the audience is supposed to identify with, but even as he finds himself being chased by gangsters for reasons we don’t think he understands, Depp doesn’t seem upset, confused or even inconvenienced. He just looks bored. And, thus, so do the rest of us. PG-13. MATTHEW SINGER. Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Cinema 99, Cinetopia, City Center, Cornelius, Division, Evergreen, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Oak Grove, Pioneer Place, Sandy, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville. 45

Unstoppable

It is nothing more than a runaway-train picture. But it is a really good runaway-train picture. In its direct, steaming way, it is the most satisfying genre exercise Tony Scott has ever made—easily the equal of The Last Boy Scout or Enemy of the State. PG-13. AARON MESH. Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Cinema 99, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Forest, Lloyd Mall, Movies on TV. 90

Waiting for Superman

61 The documentary from Davis Guggenheim, director of An Inconvenient Truth, introduces

POST-COLONIST: Isabelle Huppert.

WHITE MATERIAL It takes time to get your bearings in a Claire Denis film. Her movies define themselves leisurely, like a landscape fading up from night to dawn to morning. White Material, the remarkable new movie by this French master responsible for three nearly perfect films already (Beau Travail, Trouble Every Day, The Intruder), begins with a succession of unsettling fragments: a soldier lying dead in a dark room; a man trapped in a burning building; and a woman, Maria Vial (Isabelle Huppert), running to or from some as yet vague emergency. Broad context emerges soon enough—we are in an unnamed African country verging on post-colonial Hobbesian hell—and so we have some idea of how that soldier came to be there, why that building is on fire, and what Maria is fleeing or chasing, but Denis embellishes these initial adumbrations slowly and carefully, even gently, as if White Material’s escalating chaos could tip over into incurable madness at any moment. Committed to staying on at her floundering coffee plantation, Maria remains startlingly unfazed by the machete-wielding boy soldiers prowling her property and the mercenary rebels demanding exorbitant tolls just beyond the gates of her vulnerable homestead. Old hierarchies have collapsed, the bottom has fallen out, and while everyone claws each other on the way down, Maria waits for the ground to rise up to meet her, stubbornly refusing to acknowledge, until it is too late, that she is an outsider who happens to be at the center of a war. Maria’s willful occlusion and sometimes cruel denials—of her own culpability, of her son’s slow slide into nihilism—never register as frigid villainy, because Denis is less intent on probing post-colonial psychology than conjuring a vivid daydream of creeping dread and bound destinies. White Material’s most stunning moments are silent snapshots of the slow motions and still lives that bracket acts of violence: rebels emerging, wraithlike, from a stand of trees; a ragtag militia of children napping in a looted house; a transistor radio squawking in the dirt; bodies prone behind a pharmacy counter. It is almost as if Maria has been cast as the political actor who shall not act, so that this violence, seemingly so arbitrarily dispersed, might have a place to eventually converge. White Material ends where it begins—a figure in limbo, running—and there are still people left alive to follow their loved ones into death, yet I did not want this horrible story to end, not as long as Denis was acting as guide. CHRIS STAMM.

Claire Denis blesses the pains down in Africa.

SEE IT: Opens Friday at Living Room Theaters.

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FOX SEARCHLIGHT WILLAMETTE WEEK

2 COL. (3.772") X 10"

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BREWVIEWS DRAFTHOUSE FILMS

MOVIES

NARNIA: THE VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER 3D 11:55am, 3, 6, 9 TRON: LEGACY 12:05, 3:10, 6:05, 9:10 UNSTOPPABLE 12:30, 6:30 YOGI BEAR 12:25, 3:30, 6:35, 9:35 YOGI BEAR 3D 12, 3:05, 6:10, 9:15

Roseway Theatre

7229 NE Sandy Blvd., 503-282-2898 TRON: LEGACY 3D MonThu 1:30, 4:45, 8 Fri-Sun 12:30, 3:45, 7, 10:15

NORTHWEST Cinema 21

616 NW 21st Ave., 503-223-4515 Call for showtimes.

Mission Theater & Pub

BOOM, BRO: When Mohamed Osman Mohamud parked his not-actuallyexploding van next to Pioneer Courthouse Square to bomb a tree-lighting ceremony, did he know he could walk two blocks to Fox Tower to watch his jihadist brothers try to bomb the London Marathon? The moronic mujahideen in Four Lions could be Mohamud’s British contacts: Radicalized would-be rappers who explain the Quran with parables from The Lion King, they have real bombs, which they successfully detonate on themselves, a crow and a sheep. Do you find domestic terrorism less funny after Portland tasted its sick stupidity? Wrong lesson. We’re in it now. We have to find it more funny. AARON MESH. Academy, Laurelhurst. Best paired with: Caldera Pilsner. Also showing: A Christmas Story (Laurelhurst). 5:10 Sat 2:40 Sun 2:40 THE GIRL WHO KICKED THE HORNET’S NEST Fri-Mon, Wed-Thu 6:50, 9:35 SatSun 4 Sun 1:10

DOWNTOWN Broadway Metro 4 1000 SW Broadway, 800-326-3264 DUE DATE Fri-Tue 2:45, 5:15, 7:45, 10:15 LOVE & OTHER DRUGS Fri-Tue 2:15, 4:45, 7:15, 10 TANGLED FriTue 2:30, 5, 7:30, 9:45 THE SOCIAL NETWORK Fri-Tue 2, 4:30, 7, 9:30

Fifth Ave. Cinemas 510 SW Hall St., 503-725-3551 Call for showtimes.

Fox Tower Stadium 10

COLUMBIA PICTURES PRESENTS A GRACIE FILMS PRODUCTICO- ON A FILM BY JAMES L. BROOKS “HOW DO YOU KNOW” KATHRYN HAHN PRODUCER ALDRIC LA’AULI PORTER MUSIC MUSIC EXECUTIVE SUPERVISION BY NICK ANGEL BY HANS ZIMMER PRODUCERS JOHN D. SCHOFIELD RICHARD SAKAI PRODUCED WRITTEN AND BY JAMES L. BROOKS PAULA WEINSTEIN LAURENCE MARK JULIE ANSELL DIRECTED BY JAMES L. BROOKS 1 COL. X 3" = 3" (SAU) FILLER AD

STARTS FRIDAY, DECEMBER 17

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2 COL. (3.825") X 10" = 20" WED 12/15 PORTLAND WILLAMETTE WEEK

846 SW Park Ave., 800-326-3264 127 HOURS 12:05, 2:25, 4:30, 7:10, 9:45 BLACK SWAN 11:55am, 12:30, 1, 2:20, 3:05, 4:25, 5, 5:35, 7:05, 7:30, 8, 9:30, 10, 10:20 BURLESQUE 12:10, 2:40, 5:10, 7:40, 10:10 FAIR GAME 12:20, 2:45, 5:15, 7:35, 9:55 I LOVE YOU PHILLIP MORRIS 12:15, 2:35, 5:25, 7:45, 10:05 RARE EXPORTS: A CHRISTMAS TALE 12:50, 3, 5:05, 7:15, 9:40 THE FIGHTER 11:45am, 12:45, 2:30, 4:15, 5:20, 7, 7:50, 9:35, 10:25

Living Room Theaters

341 SW 10th Ave., 971-222-2010 HEMINGWAY’S GARDEN OF EDEN Fri-Tue 11:40am, 3, 5:20, 7:45, 9:50 MORNING GLORY Fri-Tue 12, 2:20, 5, 7:30, 9:45 STRANGE POWERS: STEPHIN MERRITT AND THE MAGNETIC FIELDS Fri-Tue 2:30 Fri-Mon 7 THE GIRL WHO KICKED THE HORNET’S NEST FriTue 12:05, 2, 5:10, 8:20 WAITING FOR SUPERMAN Fri-Tue 9 Fri-Mon 4:40 WASTE LAND Fri-Tue 12:20, 2:40, 4:50, 7:15, 9:30 WHITE MATERIAL Fri-Tue 11:50am, 2:10, 4:30, 6:50, 9:10

Pioneer Place Stadium 6

340 SW Morrison St., 800-326-3264 HARRY POTTER AND

Week DECEMBER 15, 2010 250COL.Willamette X 2 = 4" (SAU)

wweek.com

FILLER AD

THE DEATHLY HALLOWS: PART 1 Fri-Tue 12:40, 3:45, 7:05, 10:10 HOW DO YOU KNOW Fri-Tue 1, 4:30, 7:30 Fri-Mon 10:20 LITTLE FOCKERS Wed-Thu 1:15, 4:10, 7:20, 10 Tue 12:01 THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: THE VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER 3D Fri-Tue 12:30, 4, 7, 10 THE TOURIST Fri-Tue 12:50, 4:10, 7:20 Fri-Mon 10:25 TRON: LEGACY 3D Fri-Tue 12:45, 4:15, 7:15, 10:15 TRUE GRIT Wed-Thu 1, 4, 7, 10:15 Tue 12:01 YOGI BEAR FriTue 1:10, 4:20, 7:10, 9:50

Whitsell Auditorium

1219 SW Park Ave., 503-221-1156 BRITISH AD AWARDS Sat 4 EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF Fri-Sun 7 Fri 9 Sat 9 Sun 5

NORTH Portlander Cinema 10350 N Vancouver Way, 503-240-5850 Call for showtimes.

St. Johns Pub and Theater

8203 N Ivanhoe St., 503-249-7474 ELF Fri-Sun, Tue-Thu 6:30 HEREAFTER 9 Wed 1 MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL Mon 5:30 THE POLAR EXPRESS Sat-Tue 1

St. Johns Twin Cinemas and Pub

8704 N Lombard St., 503-286-1768 HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS: PART 1 Fri-Tue 4:40, 7:50 SatSun 1:30 TRON: LEGACY 5:20, 7:55 Fri 10:20 Sat 2:30, 10:20 Sun 2:30 TRUE GRIT Wed-Thu 5, 7:20

NORTHEAST Hollywood Theatre

4122 NE Sandy Blvd., 503-281-4215 SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT Wed 9:30 SMILE ’TIL IT HURTS: THE UP WITH PEOPLE STORY Sat-Sun 12:50, 2:25 Fri 5 TAMARA DREWE 7:15, 9:25 Fri-Sun

Kennedy School

5736 N.E. 33rd Ave., 503-249-7474 DESPICABLE ME Sat 3 LEGEND OF THE GUARDIANS: THE OWLS OF GA’HOOLE Sat 12:30 RED 8:05 SECRETARIAT 5:30 Tue-Thu 2:30 THE TOWN Fri-Sat 10:30am

Laurelhurst Theater

2735 E Burnside St., 232-5511 4 LIONS Fri-Sun 4:40, 7:30, 9:40 Mon-Thurs 7:30, 9:40 SECRETARIAT Sat-Sun 1 THE TOWN Fri-Sun 4, 9:30 Mon-Thurs 9:30 RED Fri 7:10 Sat-Sun 1:15, 7:10 MonThurs 7:10 GET LOW FriSun 4:10 Mon-Thurs 6:45 INCEPTION Fri-Thurs 9 A CHRISTMAS STORY Fri 7 Sat-Sun 1:45, 7 EASY A FriSun 4:30, 9:15 Mon-Thurs 9:15 IT’S KIND OF A FUNNY STORY Fri 6:45 Sat-Sun 1:30, 6:45 Mon-Thurs 7

Lloyd Center Stadium 10 Cinema

1510 N.E. Multnomah Blvd., 800-326-3264 BLACK SWAN Fri-Tue 11:50am, 2:30, 5:10, 7:50, 10:30 HOW DO YOU KNOW Fri-Tue 12:30, 3:30, 6:45, 9:40 LITTLE FOCKERS Tue 12:01 TANGLED 3D Fri-Tue 11:45am, 2:15, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45 THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: THE VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER Fri-Tue 12:20, 3:10, 6:35, 9:20 THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: THE VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER 3D Fri-Tue 12:55, 4:35, 7:30, 10:15 THE FIGHTER FriTue 1, 3:55, 7:05, 10 THE TOURIST Fri-Tue 12, 12:45, 3, 3:45, 6:30, 7, 9:30 FriMon 10:10 TRON: LEGACY 3D Fri-Tue 12:10, 12:40, 3:20, 3:50, 6:50, 7:20, 9:55, 10:25 TRUE GRIT Tue 12:01

1624 NW Glisan St., 503-249-7474 HEREAFTER Fri, Sun, TueThu 7:45 Sat-Sun 2:30 JACKASS 3 Fri-Sun, TueThu 10:15am RED Fri, Sun, Tue-Thu 5:30

SOUTHEAST Academy Theater

7818 SE Stark St., 503-252-0500 DESPICABLE ME 4:40 SatThu 2:15 Sat 12:10 Sun 12:10 FOUR LIONS 9:35 Sat-Thu 5 Sat 12:30 HEREAFTER 7 INCEPTION Fri-Sun, Tue-Thu 9:10 Mon 9:40 NEVER LET ME GO 9:45 RED Sat-Thu 2:40, 7:15 SECRETARIAT 4:30 THE TOWN Fri-Sun 6:45 TOY STORY 3 Mon-Thu 2:10 Sat-Sun 11:50am

Avalon Theatre

3451 SE Belmont St., 503-238-1617 DESPICABLE ME 1:30, 5 EASY A 3:15, 6:45 JACKASS 3 8:30, 10:15 LEGEND OF THE GUARDIANS: THE OWLS OF GA’HOOLE 12, 1:45, 5:40 RED 3:35, 7:30 THE TOWN 9:35

Bagdad Theater & Pub 3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-249-7474 HEREAFTER Sun, Tue-Thu 8:50 Mon 9:15 Fri 7:35 Sat 7:50 LIFE AS WE KNOW IT Sun, Tue-Thu 6 Fri 5 Sat 5:15

Century at Clackamas Town Center

12000 SE 82nd Ave., 800-326-3264 BLACK SWAN 11:25am, 2:10, 4:55, 7:40, 10:25am BURLESQUE Fri-Tue 10:45am, 1:35, 4:20, 7:20, 10:10am DUE DATE Fri-Tue 10:40am, 1, 3:25, 5:50, 8:15, 10:45am HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS: PART 1 Fri-Tue 12, 3:30, 7, 10:15 HOW DO YOU KNOW Fri-Tue 10:25am, 1:25, 3:15, 4:30, 7:30, 9:10, 10:30am LOVE & OTHER DRUGS Fri-Tue 1:55, 7:15 MEGAMIND Fri-Tue 11:40am, 2:05, 4:45 RED Fri-Tue 7:10, 9:50 TANGLED Fri-Tue 10:20am, 12:50, 3:20, 5:50, 8:30 TANGLED 3D FriTue 11:15am, 1:50, 4:25, 7, 9:40 THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: THE VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER Fri-Tue 12:20, 3:10, 6, 8:50 THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: THE VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER 3D Fri-Tue 10:30am, 11:30am, 1:20, 2:15, 4:05, 5, 6:50, 7:50, 9:35, 10:40am THE FIGHTER 10:55am, 1:45, 4:35, 7:25, 10:20am

Lloyd Mall 8 Cinema

2320 Lloyd Center Mall, 800-326-3264 BURLESQUE 3:35, 6:25 DUE DATE 12:35, 8:55 HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS: PART 1 12:10, 3:15, 6:15, 9:20 LOVE&OTHER DRUGS 3:20, 9:05 TANGLED 12:15, 3:25, 6:20, 9:25 THE CHRONICLES OF

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