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WILLAMETTE WEEK PORTLAND’S NEWSWEEKLY

“IT’S NOT QUITE AS BAD AS DRINKING ONE’S OWN BILE.”

The Woman Behind The Bridge

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By Andrea Damewood | Page 10

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ANNIVERSARY

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INBOX OREGON’S POT FUTURE

Oregon should legitimize its current huge cannabis industry with an eye toward the eventual nationwide market, and position its growers and processors for global domination [“Endo Days,” WW, Feb. 20, 2013]. A good place to start [would be] with low barriers to entry that bring the maximum number of people into the industry, and a tax structure that makes Oregon pot the most competitive pricewise. Oregon’s pot market can be more diverse, dispersed and craft-oriented than Washington’s and Colorado’s. It could be like craft-brew Oregon beer. More permits means more innovation, variety and lower prices.... Make sure legalization is about jobs. Legalize your supplier and the world around you: It will lead to having the best pot anywhere on the planet. —“otishertz” Ganja Jon [“Oil Baron,” WW, Feb. 20, 2013] is also a man of great honor in the cannabis community, a breath of fresh (cough) air. —“DaveG” This article makes pot sound like a crazy drug that makes you dumb and everything so amazing [“You’re Not High in Portland Until...” WW, Feb. 20, 2013]. Please don’t represent us anymore. Anything that would sound silly to do after drinking two beers also sounds silly to make a big deal of doing while high. It’s just not that big of a deal. Giggling about it like a college freshman doesn’t help the case for legalization. —“Goober”

COLUMBIA RIVER CROSSING

This is the definition of boondoggle [“Making It Up as They Go,” WW, Feb. 20, 2013]. Millions spent, no consistent plan, no real need and no support except from those who will profit from it. Meanwhile, 50 percent of the roads in Portland are in poor shape. Shut this thing down. —“Kevin” Please contact Gov. John Kitzhaber and the state representatives listed in this article to let them know that Oregonians do not support leveraging our future to obtain $450 million for a doomed project. —“Michael Murray” My own reluctance about the Columbia River Crossing is tied to the likelihood that it will turn Interstate 205 into a parking lot filled with motorists avoiding the toll on I-5. —“Edward Hershey”

LIFE ON 82ND AVENUE

I’m a Caucasian Montavillian who is incredibly proud to live in a predominantly Asian neighborhood [“Avenue of the Roses,” WW, Feb. 20, 2013]. I love it here and love to see us growing and making 82nd a better corridor. —“seldon” LEttErs to thE Editor must include the author’s street address and phone number for verification. Letters must be 250 or fewer words. Submit to: 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Fax: (503) 243-1115. Email: mzusman@wweek.com.

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WASTING TIME ON THE PUBLIC PAYROLL? BLAME CANADA. City officials were flushed with pride last November over news that the Portland Loo open-air public restroom they sold to Victoria, B.C., had been voted “Canada’s Best Toilet” in a national poll. But documents obtained in a lawsuit against the city show analysts for the Portland Water Bureau used city email to drum up a socialmedia campaign soliciting votes in the contest. “Consider strategy to get 5-10 people or LOO groups to nominate Portland Loo in this contest,” wrote one Water Bureau employee in a May 2012 email. “Will you three be able to tell us how many folks actually nominated the Loo?? Many thanks.” The plaintiffs—whose lawsuit over the Water Bureau’s use of utility funds turned up the emails—aren’t grateful. “We are disappointed that Portland water ratepayers’ hard-earned dollars were spent on staff time to artificially impact a contest,” says John DiLorenzo Jr., the ratepayers’ lawyer. Water Bureau director David Shaff says the employee was doing her job. “The idea was to market the Loo,” Shaff says. “That would be one way to do it.” State Rep. Julie Parrish (R-West Linn) is taking some heat for her comments during the Feb. 22 Oregon House debate over a tuitionequity bill to allow undocumented immigrants to pay in-state college tuition. Parrish bucked her caucus with a “yes” vote on the bill, which passed 39-17. But she also used the occasion to distribute copies of a flier from a constituent to the 59 other House members highlighting PARRISH the sexual assault of the constituent’s daughter by a scary-looking Latino man. Many thought Parrish’s timing was inappropriate and distasteful, given that the tuition debate focused on Latino immigrants. Rep. Jessica Vega Pederson (D-Portland) took offense, accusing Parrish of “scare tactics” and being “incredibly hypocritical.” Parrish says no constituent had ever asked her to distribute such a flier before—and that she’d do it again, even if it conflicted with her position. “I don’t have to agree with everyone to represent them well,” Parrish says. A pollster who worked on last fall’s failed pot legalization initiative says the measure’s primary backer, Paul Stanford, still owes him money—but the money and Stanford have gone up in smoke. Mike Riley, owner of Portland’s Riley Research Associates, tells WW he did polling last summer for Stanford, chief proponent of Measure 80, who owns a chain of medical-marijuana clinics. Riley says Stanford never paid him his $2,500 fee. “He thought the poll would show a lot more support for the measure than it did,” Riley tells WW. “He’s become invisible since the poll.” Measure 80 failed with 45 percent of the vote. Stanford—who personally paid much of the $400,000 spent to get the initiative on the ballot—didn’t return WW’s phone calls. Read more Murmurs and daily scuttlebutt.

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NEWS

FINDING ASPHALT: Portland streets aren’t getting equal paving under a plan proposed by Mayor Charlie Hales. Southeast 42nd Avenue (right) remains a mud hole even as nearby Southeast Woodstock Boulevard gets its cracks sealed. Northeast Marine Drive (upper right) is slated for crack fixes, but Southeast 136th Avenue (above) won’t get its promised sidewalk.

WHACKING CRACKS HALES HAS FOUND MONEY TO FIX CITY STREETS. RESIDENTS SAY HIS PLAN HAS POTHOLES. By WW STA F F

243-2122

Jim Baker wants the City of Portland to repair the roads near his Hillsdale house. He just doesn’t like the one the city is choosing to fix. “I’m really happy to hear they’re patching streets that don’t need it,” says Baker, a retiree who lives less than a block from curving Southwest Terwilliger Drive. That road is starting to wear—especially at the scenic overlooks and the bus stops. Baker is far more concerned about his own side street, Southwest Burlingame Place. He says it hasn’t been repaved since he moved there in 1960. “Patch the places that have holes in them,” Baker says. “We have potholes you could break off a tire in.” Mayor Charlie Hales has made road paving his calling card and pledged to tackle the city’s backlog of road maintenance. His new interim Bureau of Transportation director, Toby Widmer, wants to shift $7.15

million to road repairs—including major grind-and-pave projects and work to seal cracks on heavy-traffic routes. It’s a preventive approach: Few of these projects will attack Portland’s worst streets, but Hales will get a speedy victory by increasing the percentage of city streets rated in “good” condition. Hales says he’ll seek new tax revenue to pave smaller streets “after we show we mean it with black tar.” About $4.5 million will come from putting off Sellwood Bridge debts (which have to be repaid later). East Portland advocates are outraged that a $1.2 million sidewalk-building project would be scrapped. Commissioner Amanda Fritz dislikes plans to put off adding curbs for disabled access. WW visited five sites Hales wants to fix and the East Portland sidewalk project PBOT plans to cut. We also spoke with residents on these mean streets who often want very different fixes from what the city is promising. “Tell him to get off the main streets and into the neighborhoods,” says Baker’s wife, Fran. “He’ll see where the real problems are.”

SOME WINNERS: North Willamette Boulevard, between Alta and Wabash avenues. This 3.1-mile stretch above Swan Island will doubly benefit. Part of it has been identified for quick crack-sealing fixes; other potholescarred stretches are on the long list of candidates for a full grind-and-pave. The road could also benefit from $300,000 to compel property owners to repair sidewalks. Our reporter tripped three times on sidewalk cracks along Willamette Boulevard. Neighborhood resident Kelly Herman says that’s common. “You have to pick up your feet when you jog, especially at night,” she says. “Biking here is really bumpy, too.” Northeast Marine Drive, west of 138th Avenue. Deep cracks span the two lanes along the Columbia River, and potholes can accommodate a man’s size-12 shoe. Pam Bond, who is mixing banana bread batter in the kitchen of her modest house perched above the river, says she’d rather the city lower and enforce the speed limit. “People just go way too fast,” Bond says. “I’ve been to the hospital because somebody plowed into the back of me.” Southeast Woodstock Boulevard, between 41st and 51st avenues. Two years ago, a sinkhole that extended to the sewer line appeared outside Otto’s Sausage Kitchen at 4138 SE Woodstock Blvd., says Otto’s owner, Gretchen Eichentopf.

The city has since fixed that hole, and residents agree the street is in good repair. But across from Otto’s, Southeast 42nd Avenue is a medley of puddles and gravel. “They need to do the side streets, not the main streets,” says Eichentopf. ONE BIG LOSER: A new sidewalk for Southeast 136th Avenue, from Powell to Holgate boulevards. What gets cut to fill the cracks in Portland streets? A sidewalk for Elizabeth Ellis’ kids, Tony, 10, and Eliana, 6, who walk the route to school. “People just fly by,” Ellis says. “I don’t know how many times I’ve seen people almost been hit by a car’s side mirror or something.” She switched her kids out of Gilbert Heights Elementary to avoid crossing 136th, which another resident describes as “busy as a freeway.” Along a half-mile stretch between Holgate and Powell, our reporters saw 15 kids get off a school bus and walk along speeding traffic on a shoulder as narrow as two feet and dotted with mud puddles. “I can’t tell you how many times I’ve almost been hit,” says Mary Waller, who lives off Southeast 136th Avenue. “I realize that money is tight, but their priority should be for safety, not potholes.” Reported by Matt Kauffman, Aaron Mesh, Michael Munkvold and Kate Schimel. Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

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NEWS

NOT PHONING IT IN: Chief Mike Reese and the Portland Police Bureau say their plan is to release information in officer-involved shootings to the public as soon as they can. Mayor Charlie Hales says he’s “reinforcing” that strategy.

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When he ran for mayor, Charlie Hales promised he would change the culture of a Portland Police Bureau known for controversial shootings and violent treatment of the mentally ill. But when police shot and killed a federal fugitive outside Adventist Medical Center on Feb. 17, Hales showed one way he’s making that change: by encouraging the cops to take charge of their own story. It was Hales’ office that urged the police Feb. 20 to hold a press conference to premiere a cellphone video they had obtained of the shooting, taken from a nearby dormitory window, that shows Merle M. Hatch cursing officers before charging them. “I think [the police] are being a lot more open about things,” says City Commissioner Dan Saltzman. “I give credit to Mayor Hales for sticking to what he said he was going to do: more transparency.” The police’s first accounts of their killing of Hatch had all the hallmarks of the troubled officer-involved shootings before it. The first police press releases said officers gave commands to Hatch—a patient at the hospital who they were told had a gun—then shot him. The heat grew more intense Feb. 19, when The Oregonian reported Hatch didn’t have a gun. But the police had already found the person who shot a video while canvassing the dorm of Walla Walla University’s Portland campus, a nursing college associated with Adventist, the day after the shooting. They showed it to the mayor on the morning of Feb. 20—immediately after the 48-hour waiting period for involved officers to confer with union lawyers. Detectives decided releasing it

wouldn’t jeopardize the investigation. Police spokesman Sgt. Pete Simpson tells WW the bureau had intended to send out the video with an email press release. “We disclose what we can, when we can,” Simpson says. But sources in City Hall say Hales’ office urged the police to go further in publicizing the video to knock down a growing narrative in the news and social media that the shooting might have been unjustified. Hales says he is providing “reinforcement” to Reese’s strategy of releasing information faster. “Let’s get it out,” Hales says, snapping his fingers. “That will be our standard. If you’re doing the right thing, transparency is your friend.” One day after The Oregonian story, Hales and Chief Mike Reese invited reporters to the 15th floor of the Justice Center and, after Simpson switched off the lights, played the video. It shows Hatch running about 200 feet toward officers. “I’m coming to you then, pig!” he yells, then counts to three as officers order Hatch to stop. When Hatch reaches three, they shoot him. “The video really helped to comfort the public that the officers were doing their jobs,” says Baruti Artharee, Hales’ chief policy adviser on public safety. The facts of the shooting were still the same. But the video made the officers’ reaction seem different. “It gives the public a little window into what they’re thinking right then,” Simpson tells WW. “He’s sprinting at them, screaming at them. It helped shape the public perception of the facts.” Since Hales took office in January, the cops have faced more problems. Reese took criticism for not firing Capt. Todd Wyatt after complaints he had inappropriately touched female employees. And bureau services director Mike Kuykendall resigned after sending text messages calling another officer a Nazi. Within 24 hours of the video’s release, the media frenzy ground to a halt—and the Police Bureau had its first public-relations victory in a while. Artharee’s office had been barraged with calls after the shooting. Since the video was released, Artharee says, he hasn’t received any. Saltzman, who oversaw the Police Bureau during the 2010 fatal shooting of Aaron Campbell, says Hales’ approach will be tested by the cops’ instinct to close ranks in less defensible killings. “There will be other situations that look a lot worse than this,” he says.

spORTs C r a i g M i tC h e l l dy e r / P o r t l a n d t i M b e r s

TIMBERS 3.0 CAN A NEW COACH WITH AN AGGRESSIVE SCORING STRATEGY GIVE PORTLAND A TEAM THAT CAN WIN? By M AT T H E W KO R F H AGE mkorfhage@wweek.com

Portland Timbers striker Ryan Johnson’s second of three goals against the San Jose Earthquakes on Feb. 17 probably won’t show up on any highlight reels. But the buildup to Johnson’s score in the preseason match was elegant and simple: two short passes into the center of the penalty box from forward Darlington Nagbe and midfielder Diego Valeri, then a soft chip into the goal by Johnson. The whole thing looked almost routine. But it’s been far from that for the Timbers, who since joining Major League Soccer in 2011 have struggled to find a way to score consistently. In 2012, under doomed coach John Spencer and interim coach Gavin Wilkinson, the offense was nothing short of miserable: 34 goals in 34 games, worst in the league except for lowly Chivas USA. The Nagbe-Valeri-Johnson exchange represents the improvement Timbers fans may see in 2013: creating scoring chances by weaving through the center of the pitch with a complexity reflecting the offense under new coach Caleb Porter. The Timbers open the regular season March 3 at home against the New York Red Bulls, and Portland fans may have to check their game programs to figure out who’s playing. Injuries and trades mean only four familiar faces from last season will probably start for the Timbers: goalkeeper Donovan Ricketts, midfielder Diego Chara, and forwards Nagbe and Kalif Alhassan. So fans are left to wonder: Will this year be any different? And whom should we be watching to see if it is?

Ryan Johnson An injury to forward Bright Dike—who showed spark late last season—has caused the Timbers’ scoring hopes to again fall

FINDING THE WAY FORWARD: Timbers midfielder Diego Valeri looks to pass in Portland’s 1-1 preseason tie with Swedish team AIK on Feb 23.

largely on a single player this year: Jamaican forward Ryan Johnson. Timbers fans understand this risk, after seeing their team rely heavily on lone wolves in the past: Kenny Cooper and, last year, on the oversold, languid Kris Boyd. Porter’s offense promises to open up shooting to more players—especially Nagbe—but keep an eye on the 28-year-old Johnson. The quick-footed, hard-working striker creates a lot of movement around the box, and is a level-headed presence when it comes to finishing with a soft touch. His preseason hat trick against San Jose gave fans great hope. But Johnson’s record is inconsistent. After an 11-goal season with the Earthquakes in 2009, he scored only four goals in the next two seasons, and had only slightly better success (seven goals) with Toronto FC last year. He will also probably miss part of the Timbers’ season to fulfill commitments with the Jamaican national team. Several Timbers players, says Stumptown Footy’s William Conwell, “can work magic with the ball at their feet. None have shown the ability to take down the ball, hold it up, and bring the rest of the team into the attack that Johnson possesses.”

Diego Valeri

Two of Johnson’s assists against San Jose came from newly acquired Argentinian midfielder Diego Valeri. “Diego is always looking to pass,” Nagbe says, “and Ryan [Johnson] is always looking to finish.” Valeri, 26, is the type of player the Timbers have not yet possessed as a majorleague team: an aggressive, offensively minded midfielder who runs point on the attack. As Porter puts it: “Valeri is a playmaker, a guy who’s going to create a lot of goals through his vision and passing. He can unlock teams with precision passing.” More than any other of the Timbers’ recent acquisitions, Valeri is probably the linchpin of Porter’s new offense.

Will Johnson

Midfielder Will Johnson—Porter’s choice as team captain in multiple preseason games—will be a more undercover presence for the Timbers. As captain, he’s quiet. And despite a habit of taking an occasional low-percentage shot from outside the penalty box, Johnson, 26, is less an offensive dynamo than the bulwark for the team’s defense, a box-to-box runner much like Chara.

NEWS

“Him and Chara are workhorses,” Porter says.

The (Still) Leaky Defense

Defense remains a glaring trouble spot for the Timbers. With two center backs out with injuries—Hanyer Mosquera and David Horst—the biggest weight falls on newly acquired French defender Mikael Silvestre to use his experience to shore up gaps. “If you’ve got a good center back,” Porter says, “he’s pretty much joysticking the other three [defenders], making sure they’re doing what they need to do.” Silvestre’s résumé includes 40 games with the French national team and stints with English Premier League giants Manchester United and Arsenal. But at 35, he is an injury risk and a probable short-term solution; without Silvestre, the green defensive line of Ryan Miller, Dylan Tucker-Gangnes and Andrew Jean-Baptiste has so far shown itself prone to gaffes and collapses.

The Coach

All hope for 2013 begins and ends with Porter and the aggressive style he honed during his successful seven seasons as men’s head coach at the University of Akron. Porter’s system depends on maintaining possession of the ball and making quick passes to penetrate the opposing team’s defense. But it also relies heavily on the defense to push the offense forward, which can leave the team vulnerable to counterattacks—as seen in the 3-3 tie with San Jose, when the Earthquakes scored by breaking down the Timbers’ offense at midfield. “Porter’s preferred style of play, pushing the team’s outside backs forward into the attack, puts a large amount of responsibility on the center backs to anchor the defense with little support,” Conwell says. Porter has a more rigid system than a lot of professional coaches. Unlike other teams on which players are left to their own devices, says forward Ryan Johnson, Porter is more likely to drill the team with set plays. Porter says simply having the players know where and when to make runs is only a small part of it. “A big part of winning is having the right mentality, that winning fiber,” Porter says. “You can’t bottle it.”

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

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BRIDGE TENDER: Patricia McCaig’s tireless work pushing the $3.4 billion Columbia River Crossing forward—despite serious project challenges—resulted in a successful Oregon House vote to commit $450 million for the project. The Senate is expected to vote soon.

THE FORCE BEHIND OREGON’S MASSIVE FREEWAY PROJECT WORKS FOR THE GOVERNOR— AND A PRIVATE COMPANY THAT WANTS IT BUILT. On Feb. 11, Gov. John Kitzhaber strode into a legislative hearing and made his strongest pitch yet for the massive highway project called the Columbia River Crossing. Hearing Room F in the State Capitol was jammed, and the meeting before 16 House and Senate members was thoroughly choreographed. After all, Kitzhaber is gambling his reputation on the biggest public-works project in Oregon history—a $3.4 billion freeway bridge and lightrail line across the Columbia between Portland and Vancouver, something the state’s most powerful businesses and unions have wanted for years. During his first term as governor, Kitzhaber in 1997 said Oregon could not build wider freeways and spend its way out of the very kind of traffic congestion backers claim the CRC would solve. But on this day, Kitzhaber leaned into the microphone and repeated the support he’s expressed for the CRC, especially since he ran again for governor in 2010. “This is a construction-ready project that will increase mobility and decrease congestion,” he said. “We have reached a point of opportunity and of significant urgency.” Two years ago, Kitzhaber couldn’t even get lawmakers

to vote on a symbolic resolution to express support for the CRC. This time, it was a done deal: The committee approved a $450 million measure to make Oregon’s down payment. The House passed the measure 45-11 on Feb. 25, and the bill could go to the Senate this week. The difference between failure and success was a slight woman dressed in black who watched the governor from the back of the room, leaning forward, her chin resting on her fist. Patricia McCaig has been a political insider for decades, pulling off coups and building a reputation as someone with the strategic smarts to turn around troubled campaigns. She did it in 1990 for Barbara Roberts’ campaign for governor, for Kitzhaber in his 2010 victory, and now for the CRC. “Five years ago, the idea that Oregon would be the likeliest state to first appropriate its share of the local match was almost laughable,” says Bill Wyatt, director of the heavily pro-CRC Port of Portland. “Patricia’s engagement has been the difference.” Her flinty and aggressive style makes her an effective advocate and intimidating foe. “Patricia McCaig is not an ingratiating type,” says longtime Oregon pollster Tim Hibbitts, who briefly worked as McCaig’s business partner. “If I were working a major political campaign in Oregon, I would absolutely want Patricia on my campaign. Period.” Kitzhaber has made McCaig, 58, his top adviser on the CRC, a position in which she has waged a years-long political battle to make sure 2013 is the project’s year. But she is not a state employee. McCaig’s paycheck is signed by the CRC’s biggest contractor, David Evans and

Associates, which profits by the project going forward. To date, McCaig has been paid $417,000. Government ethics experts from across the country interviewed by WW say Kitzhaber’s use of McCaig appears to be a conflict of interest and demonstrates a lack of transparency. McCaig’s billings show she has worked more than 800 hours since mid-2011 trying to convince Oregon lawmakers to approve the CRC. But records show she has never registered as a lobbyist with the Oregon Government Ethics Commission, which could be a violation of state ethics laws (see sidebar). The long journey of the CRC—and McCaig’s role promoting it—is a telling story of the way in which a huge, deeply flawed project can still move forward via power politics and a whole lot of spin. Kitzhaber declined to be interviewed for this story. He canceled an interview scheduled with WW two weeks ago, citing a conflict in his calendar, and has not rescheduled. McCaig declined repeated requests to be interviewed for this story. “My job is strategic communications,” McCaig told WW, “and this isn’t part of those strategic communications to get the bridge built.” In the years following TriMet’s opening of the MAX lightrail system in 1986, Oregon planners have dreamed about running a train line across the Columbia River. But in 1995, Vancouver voters rejected a plan to extend Portland light rail into their city. For the next few years, officials from the two states discussed how Oregon could convince its northern neighbors to accept a MAX train. Their answer: Build us a few freeway. The existing side-by-side Interstate 5 drawbridges and their accompanying poorly spaced interchanges cause daily traffic jams and slow Port of Portland freight traffic. In 2002, with Kitzhaber backing the idea, Washington and Oregon sketched out a plan for a new bridge with light rail. In March 2004, two familiar faces showed up in the office of then-Gov. Ted Kulongoski. One was former Oregon Gov. Neil Goldschmidt, who was working for two major contractors, Bechtel Corporation and Parsons Brinckerhoff. His partner was Tom Imeson, a longtime political insider who had been Goldschmidt’s chief of staff in the governor’s office. Imeson led Kulongoski’s transition team, as he has also done twice for Kitzhaber. Goldschmidt and Imeson urged Kulongoski to put the CRC at the top of his transportation agenda. The state Department of Transportation started planning. Over the next five years, the planned bridge got bigger and wider. But by 2009, the CRC was in trouble. Local governments agreed to a plan, but bickered over the number of lanes on the bridge. Vancouver’s mayoral race was won by a candidate who opposed tolling—a major part of the finance plan. And criticism over the lack of money for the CRC grew louder and more credible by the day. Goldschmidt by then had been tarnished by scandal with his admission he had repeatedly raped a teenage girl while Portland mayor. His lobbying partner, Imeson, landed at the Port of Portland. Sources in the Kulongoski administration say Imeson and Wyatt, the port’s executive director, insisted the CRC get new leadership. The name they put forward was Patricia McCaig. cont. on page 12 Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

McCAIG

cont.

(Imeson confirmed this account. Wyatt, when first asked, said he couldn’t remember what role he played, but later said Kulongoski chose McCaig without his involvement.) “She has been involved in the public life of Oregon at the highest levels for over 30 years, so she brings quite a Rolodex and set of experiences to a job like this,” Wyatt tells WW. “That’s what she brings, a rare and unique combination of experience and contacts.” Like Imeson and Wyatt, McCaig is part of a “chief-of-staff club,” having served that role for Gov. Barbara Roberts from 1991 through 1994. McCaig was working as a secretary in a state agency when Sen. Frank Roberts (D-Portland) hired her in 1979 to help in his legislative office. McCaig was then 26, a University of Washington dropout from Indianapolis, where her father worked as an executive for Shell Oil. The professorial Roberts soon made McCaig part of his family, including her in weekly Sunday brunches and holiday dinners. “She’s like my adopted daughter,” Roberts told The Oregonian in a 1991 profile of McCaig. McCaig proved to be a keen political strategist and soon was helping Roberts’ wife, Rep. Barbara Roberts,

win election as secretary of state in 1984. Six years later, McCaig staged an upset victory when Barbara Roberts beat Republican Dave Frohnmayer, the establishment’s choice for governor. How McCaig did it is telling. Roberts trailed Frohnmayer by 15 to 20 points in the polls when McCaig poured all of the campaign’s cash into TV ads. It was August—a time when no one was paying attention to the race; Frohnmayer’s campaign chortled about her terrible misstep. But McCaig had inside information: She knew The Oregonian was in the field with a poll that would come out right after Labor Day. The Roberts ads—showing a cheery, sunny candidate—aired just as pollsters were asking voters their opinions of the candidates. McCaig’s strategy worked: The poll showed Roberts trailed by only 7 points, and it damaged perceptions of Frohnmayer’s invincibility. Roberts went on to beat him. “There were not many people who thought she had a chance to win,” Hibbitts says. “I was one of them. But they put all their money into early television buys, got the momentum and never gave it up.” McCaig ’s gruff and charge-forward demeanor contrasted with her boss’s friendly, upbeat style. But a grow-

ing power imbalance between the two was obvious enough for political insiders to start asking questions. Six months after Roberts took office, an Oregonian headline asked, “Is Patricia McCaig the real governor of Oregon?” McCaig orchestrated Roberts’ failed efforts to pass a sales tax, including a calamitous 1992 special session in which McCaig misjudged Republican leaders and left her boss embarrassed and appearing weak. The next year, Kitzhaber—who had served as Senate president—walked into Roberts’ office and announced he would challenge her in the 1994 primary. He turned and walked out, with Roberts chasing him down the hall, pleading with him to stop. He didn’t. Frank Roberts died of cancer in October 1993, and Barbara Roberts lacked the will to mount a re-election campaign Kitzhaber could very well win. McCaig and Roberts’ relationship broke apart after that, bitterly. The former governor declines to talk about McCaig. But in her 2011 memoir, Up the Capitol Steps: A Woman’s March to the Governorship, Roberts hints at McCaig’s misunderstanding of who was really governor. CONT. on page 14

POWER INTERCHANGE

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

Patricia McCaig

Former chief of staff to Gov. Barbara Roberts. Married to Tom Walsh, longtime friend of Goldschmidt. Named CRC consultant in 2009; later, as Kitzhaber’s campaign director, credited with Kitzhaber’s narrow 2010 victory. Appointed by Kitzhaber as senior adviser to the governor on the CRC while paid by the project’s biggest contractor, David Evans and Associates.

Gov. John Kitzhaber

Threatened to challenge Roberts in 1994. Proposed a more modest CRC idea while governor in 2002. Opposed big freeway projects but endorsed a bigger CRC while seeking election to third term as governor. Hired McCaig as 2010 campaign director; then promoted her to his top CRC adviser after she led his campaign to victory.

Bill Wyatt

Port of Portland executive director, former Kitzhaber chief of staff. Pushed Kulongoski to put McCaig in charge of CRC and recommended she take over Kitzhaber’s 2010 campaign.

Former Gov. Neil Goldschmidt

master and that is getting the I-5 bridge replacement project done,” Rafael says. “We have been nothing but transparent.” Judy Nadler, a senior fellow at the Markkula Center for Applied Ethics at Santa Clara (Calif.) University, says the lack of transparency the arrangement creates is unsettling. “It certainly looks like the inner circle is driving this, where it’s actually a massive public-works project that would be paid for by the taxpayers,” Nadler says. The arrangement leaves “a bad taste in the mouth,” says Lisa Gilbert of Public Citizen, a Washington D.C.-based government watch group. “Perhaps taxpayer dollars shouldn’t go to someone who can benefit on the back end.”

But Alan Rosenthal, a longtime professor of public policy and political science at Rutgers University in New Jersey, says he doesn’t see the problem with McCaig’s dual roles. “Governors should be able to seek advice from whoever they want,” he says. “The fact that she has no official position means there’s no conflict between her job as adviser to the governor and her working as subcontractor. Particularly if the governor isn’t trying to hide anything.” “If it’s bad advice and a bad project,” Rosenthal says, “Gov. Kitzhaber will have a political price to pay.” ANDREA DAMEWOOD.

Lobbied Kulongoski early on the CRC, paid by contractor Parsons Brinkerhoff. Dropped consulting business after admitting raping a 13-year-old girl.

Former Gov. Ted Kulongoski

MCCAIG: VIVIANJOHNSON.COM KITzHABER & KULONGOSKI: OREGON.GOV W YAT T & I M E S O N : P O R T O F P O R T L A N D GOLDSCHMIDT: BASIL CHILDERS

Patricia McCaig occupies one of the most unusual positions in power in Oregon political history: carrying the title of aide to the governor while being paid $417,000 since 2009 by a major consultant on the state’s biggest public-works project ever. Her role has left legislators and political insiders wondering to whom McCaig answers, and if her relationship to Gov. John Kitzhaber and the contractor is sufficiently transparent. Experts on government ethics tell WW the arrangement is troubling. “I’ve never seen anything like this before, and I’ve been doing this for 40 years,” says Bob Stern, the retired former general counsel for the California Fair Political Practices Commission, who helped write California’s conflict-ofinterest laws. “You can’t have two masters; you usually owe your allegiance to the one who pays you even if you think you believe your allegiance is to the government.” David Evans and Associates, based in Portland, is the CRC’s lead contractor for planning the project. The company has billed for more than $30 million of the $165 million spent on the project to date. The company’s executives distance themselves from McCaig. “She’s not on our payroll,” says Ron Gasper, the company’s chief financial officer. “She’s not a subconsultant to us, she’s a consultant to the project.” But documents obtained by WW show David Evans and Associates signed her company, McCaig Communications, to a contract in September 2009 at $90 an hour. Kitzhaber spokesman Tim Rafael says David Evans is the administrator of the CRC and pays everyone related to the project. He says McCaig reports directly to Oregon Department of Transportation Director Matt Garrett. “There is only one project and one

Served between Kitzhaber administrations. A lackluster CRC supporter, he was pressed by Wyatt and Imeson to install McCaig as leader of CRC effort. His adminstration arranged for McCaig to be paid by contractor David Evans and Associates.

Tom Imeson

Port of Portland general counsel. Former chief of staff and consulting partner with Goldschmidt. Has overseen transition teams for Govs. Roberts, Kitzhaber and Kulongoski. Pushed hiring of McCaig for the CRC and later Kitzhaber’s 2010 campaign.

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March 16 7:30 p.m. Evans Auditorium

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The student-organized International Fair includes international food and cultural displays from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. in Templeton ($8 for adults, $4 for children) and a free fashion show and performances from 2 to 4 p.m. in the Chapel.

Jonathan Raymond Raymond published his first novel, The Half-Life, in 2004. He cowrote the 2008 film Wendy and Lucy, which was based one of his short stories. His most recent novel is Rain Dragon.

Divining Meaning: Meditations on Gender and Religion

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March 19 5 p.m. Miller Hall, Room 105

FRIENDS OF RAIN CONCERT

Echoes and Reflections Lewis & Clark’s faculty new music ensemble presents a concert featuring music by Brett Paschal, Michael Johanson, Shulamit Ran, Toru Takemitsu, Benjamin Britten, and others. Suggested donation of $10 at the door. JAMES L. HUFFMAN LECTURE IN HONOR OF THE WESTERN RESOURCES LEGAL CENTER

Kenneth Starr, President of Baylor University Starr has had a distinguished career in academia, the law, and public service. Registration is required in advance for this free event at go.lclark.edu/Huffman_WRLC.

March 18 5:30 p.m. Agnes Flanagan Chapel

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Emptying the Tang Hand: Okinawan Identity in the Japanization of Karate Alumnus Craig Colbeck, Ph.D., will discuss how Okinawan practitioners of karate established the practice in mainland Japan.

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Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

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vIvIANJOHNSON.COM

McCAIG

about him,” says Kitzhaber campaign staffer Kevin Looper, “was his free-throw record.” McCaig immediately targeted Dudley’s lack of experience and knowledge about how government worked, compared to Kitzhaber’s long record—he’d served 24 years as a state legislator and two previous terms as governor. She was also the conduit between Kitzhaber and the campaign staff, concentrating information and her influence. “She was the epicenter,” Looper says. “That campaign wouldn’t have been able to tie its shoes without Patricia there to put her finger down on the laces.” Kitzhaber beat Dudley in one of the closest campaigns for governor in decades, winning by only 22,238 votes out of 1.45 million cast. And those close to Kitzhaber knew he could not have won his historic third term as governor without McCaig.

BRIDGING A PARADOX: On Feb. 11, Kitzhaber urged a special joint Oregon Legislative committee to sign off on $450 million plans for the Columbia River Crossing. Even though privately he’s confided he’s not a fan of the elaborate freeway, bridge and light-rail project, publicly he’s championed a fix since 2002.

SWAYING THE BRIDGE

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Hours of Influence

250

Patricia McCaig, adviser to Gov. John Kitzhaber and a CRC consultant, reports spending hundreds of hours working on getting legislators to approve the project (blue columns). State ethics

200

laws require anyone who spends more than 24 hours in a quarter trying to influence legislators must register as a lobbyist (red line).

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CRC, which is funded jointly by Oregon and Washington. In the last quarter of 2012, she reports spending as many as 219 hours on legislative issues—far beyond the 24-hour limit. The work, she reported, included meeting with legislators, answering their questions and preparing strategies to get lawmakers to approve the project. Thirty-two members of Kitzhaber’s office are registered as lobbyists. So is Oregon Department of Transportation Director Matt Garrett. In an email to WW, McCaig acknowledges not registering as a lobbyist. She claims the current CRC effort didn’t begin until Nov. 30, 2012, when Kitzhaber released his proposed budget. “There was no pending legislative action in Oregon regarding the project,” McCaig writes. “However, legislative committees or individual legislators would ask the project for educational materials or presentations. Only recently, in February, was legislation introduced.” Bersin says the law doesn’t make the distinction McCaig is trying to create. “If you’re asking me does there have to be a bill present in order for lobbying to be present,” Bersin says, “the answer is no.” ANDREA DAMEWOOD and MATT KAUFFMAN.

Hours Spent

Gov. John Kitzhaber’s top aide on the Columbia River Crossing has spent hundreds of hours in the past two years working to convince Oregon legislators to back the $3.4 billion project. But Patricia McCaig has never done what state law requires of those who get paid to persuade legislators: register as a lobbyist. The law requires anyone who “influences or attempts to influence legislative action” more than 24 hours in a three-month period to register as a lobbyist with the Oregon Government Ethics Commission. A violation of state ethics laws can bring a $5,000 fine. “Just supplying information to folks may not be lobbying,” Ron Bersin, the ethics commission director, tells WW. “If someone is attempting to influence that legislation, trying to get it passed or trying to sway them, it starts breaking into the lobbying definition.” McCaig has said her primary job is to get the CRC approved. Part of making the CRC happen is persuading legislators to fund it. Since 2011, she’s testified before lawmakers on behalf of Kitzhaber and the CRC project. WW obtained McCaig’s billings through a public-records request to the

McCaig also emerged from those years with a hatred for Kitzhaber. She witnessed what she saw then as Kitzhaber’s callous treatment of Roberts, and told friends and associates of her loathing for him. The two began their rapprochement in 2000, when Kit-

zhaber asked McCaig to help defeat several of anti-tax activist Bill Sizemore’s ballot measures. The next year, Kitzhaber appointed her to the state Board of Higher Education. McCaig had been running communications for David Evans and the CRC for eight months when Kitzhaber needed her to resuscitate his 2010 comeback campaign against Republican Chris Dudley, a former Portland Trail Blazers player who was outraising Kitzhaber by a 2-to-1 margin. McCaig became Kitzhaber’s campaign director. At that point, Kitzhaber’s campaign had been stumped as to how it should take on Dudley. “The only thing negative we had

McCaig, Roberts wrote, told the press the 1992 sales-tax fiasco was “the biggest public humiliation of my life.” “Funny, but I thought the failure and loss were mine,” Roberts wrote. “There seemed in that statement a confusion of roles and perhaps even power.”

Elected officials who have spoken to Kitzhaber say that while he publicly endorses the CRC, in private he dislikes it. But business and the trade unions wanted the CRC, and Kitzhaber embraced it during his 2010 campaign. Not long after he was elected, he appointed McCaig to be “lead adviser” on the CRC. Critics had been scoring points by arguing the CRC was based on inaccurate, high traffic counts. With $110 million spent at that point on planning, a panel of experts in 2011 found the CRC was pursuing a risky bridge design. Oregon officials couldn’t get legislators to support a symbolic measure on the CRC, and a bipartisan group of 20 legislators had also signed a letter saying cost estimates and tolling projections were iffy at best. “Before Patricia got involved in the project, the Oregon side was in deep, deep trouble,” Wyatt says. “We had no momentum.” McCaig organized what amounted to a new political campaign for Kitzhaber that plunged him in as a full partner in the CRC.

cont. In April 2011, he appeared at a kickoff press conference for a new bridge design with Washington Gov. Christine Gregoire—an event far bigger than Kitzhaber held when he launched his 2010 campaign for governor. Part of the strategy was to portray Kitzhaber and Gregoire as appearing to cut costs by selecting the leastexpensive bridge design. “A lot of the agreements and commitments and arrangements that were put in as part of the package that I inherited when I was elected, I wasn’t a party to,” Kitzhaber told the crowd of politicians, labor and business representatives. “But I want to stand with Gov. Gregoire and lend my support to this project and this decision.” McCaig came up with a strategic blueprint that looked ahead to the 2013 Legislature. To get there, she and CRC officials began to work on resistant lawmakers. One of them was Rep. Cliff Bentz (R-Ontario), who in 2009 wrote an op-ed article in The Oregonian with Reps. Jules Bailey (D-Portland) and Brian Clem (D-Salem) questioning the CRC’s proposed cost and lack of open debate. In 2011, Bentz was named co-chairman of a special oversight committee. He’s now a co-sponsor of the CRC funding bill. Bentz says he became convinced the CRC was something the state, and particularly the Port of Portland, needed. And he says McCaig was the key source of those answers. “She goes and gets the facts and brings them to you,” Bentz says. Meanwhile, CRC opponents found they were overwhelmed by McCaig’s volleys. “Patricia is getting people into rooms to lobby legislators,” says Evan Manvel, then a lobbyist for the Coalition for a Livable Future. “Every time we meet with them, we know Patricia’s got 15 lobbyists meeting with them.” Political consultant Mark Wiener says that’s McCaig doing what she calls “running the traps.” “She’s checking her bases, making sure all her people

are covered,” Wiener says. “She is relentless about that.” McCaig has taken bad, even damning news and spun it into public-relations gold. One of the CRC critics’ most persuasive arguments is that the bridge won’t pay for itself: The traffic estimates are way off, and tolls from the CRC won’t carry their share of the costs. As part of McCaig’s strategy, Kitzhaber asked Oregon Treasurer Ted Wheeler to perform an independent review of the financing plans. In July 2011, Wheeler issued a report that blew a $600 million hole in the CRC’s toll financing plan. McCaig used the report to pitch legislators a bargainbasement bridge. “We’ve clearly been directed by the governor, the public and conversations with you to go for a smaller project,” McCaig testified before lawmakers in early 2012. “That’s the reality of these times.” She called for phasing in the bridge and trimming around the edges. Kitzhaber got credit for the newer, sleeker Columbia River Crossing. But in reality, the CRC is no less expensive. The initial phase is now $2.8 billion. But the overall long-term cost of $3.4 billion hasn’t changed. And CRC officials say doing the work later will make it cost more. McCaig has also shown skill in deflecting the CRC’s accountability with one big misstep: The bridge had been designed too low. After all the planning (costs have now hit $165 million), the bridge was designed at 95 feet—not high enough for major ship traffic. When that news broke in March 2012, McCaig and CRC officials blamed the U.S. Coast Guard, which must approve the bridge’s clearance, for not warning them sooner. “It was kind of a surprise to many people, including the governor,” McCaig testified before legislators in September 2012. Except that it wasn’t. Coast Guard officials say the CRC

McCAIG

knew the bridge was being designed without enough clearance. McCaig’s own invoices show that on Nov. 1, 2011, more than four months before the news broke, she spent 2½ hours advising “CRC leadership on emerging Coast Guard permitting issues.” CRC planners have since bumped the height to 116 feet—which is still too low for some commercial traffic— and have dared the Coast Guard to reject it. The CRC’s financing and toll-revenue plans are still shaky, traffic figures are far below projections, and political opposition is growing stronger in Clark County and Washington state by the day. Despite this, McCaig’s efforts have led to a bill that nods to many of those concerns. Legislators from both parties say they face growing pressure to vote for the measure, though they decline to talk on the record about it. But what they describe is similar to the hard sell McCaig recently gave Bob Stacey, the newly elected Metro councilor and CRC foe. Stacey says McCaig met with him Jan. 22 to convince him to change his mind about the CRC. (Metro has already given its OK to the project.) “She wanted me to come over and start working and supporting the project as an elected official,” Stacey says. “She said it’s time for me to start helping rather than hindering.” Stacey says he told her the CRC is wasteful, poorly designed and damaging, and that he would do his best to bring it to a halt. “She said that was an arrogant conclusion that showed obvious disrespect for people who had worked so hard on the project,” Stacey says. Nonetheless, Stacey says he knows McCaig has a winning technique. “I wish she were somebody those of us who have concerns about the cost and harm of this project could go to to help us deliver those messages,” Stacey says. “But that’s not the side she’s working on.”

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Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

What are You Wearing?

STREET

LEATHER THE STORM HIDE IS IN PLAIN SIGHT. P h otos bY mor ga n green -hoP kin s, wweek.com/street

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

FOOD: Taste-testing dog beer. MUSIC: MarchFourth’s first march, 10 years later. STAGE: It’s our joke in a box. MOVIES: Lies my multiplex told me.

21 25 32 35

SCOOP local bounty: Last week, Gov. John Kitzhaber broke news of a TNT pilot starring Geena Davis to be shot in Oregon. Now, more details about the show, in which Davis plays a bounty hunter: The pilot was co-written by Scott Prendergast, who grew up in Portland and was president of the class of 1988 at Southwest Portland’s Wilson High School. “I wrote the original pilot with Geena Davis in mind,” he tells Scoop via email. “[She’s] perfect for the role. Very smart, and very funny. I always loved her as a kid, mainly because she was so funny in the movies I saw when I was growing up.... I told her davIs when we first had lunch that I am also a Mensa member.” Per TNT, the untitled drama stars the Oscar-winning actress as a bounty hunter with an “eccentric personality and unusual tactics.” It’s based on a real-life bounty hunter from California. Dean Devlin—who directed and produced the recently canceled Leverage—will direct when filming begins in April. lost and found: The Funhouse just got less fun. On Saturday, Feb. 23, the Clown Room in comedy venue Funhouse Lounge was stripped of its publicly accessible Wii, which contained a Super Mario Kart game. “They can bring it back, no questions asked,” said co-owner Trenton Shine, who says the Southeast Portland bar will attempt to replace the Wii and “lock it down.” The bar had been open for over a year without locking the console. Meanwhile, the rifles used by John Wayne in The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance and by William Holden in The Wild Bunch are back at Movie Madness, after being stolen from the video store last July. The guns were apparently found in a garbage bag at Mount Tabor Park, and were returned to the store. Erick Duane Johnson, the suspect in the theft, is still at large. tHRouGH tHE WIRE: Local rapper Vinnie Dewayne is recovering from a serious car accident last week. Although details of the accident are sketchy, the St. Johns-raised MC posted a photo on his Facebook page showing the side of dEWaynE his vehicle almost completely collapsed, along with a photo of him lying in a hospital bed wearing a neck brace. Dewayne sustained a broken leg, ribs and collarbone, and required surgery on his leg, according to a Facebook message. Although still suffering from dizzy spells, Dewayne reports he is “doing better.”

la taQ attacKs: Rodney Muirhead, owner of WW’s 2011 Restaurant of the Year, Podnah’s Pit, is opening a bar called La Taq next to his barbecue joint on Northeast Killingsworth Street. The kitchen will be “completely separate” from the restaurant, Muirhead says, and will focus on the type of Mexican fare often found at Podnah’s. The bar, also owned by Laika creative director Kirk Kelley, is tentatively slated to open in June. 18

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

V D e WAY N e . C O M

JOSH HALLeT / CC

GOSSIP SAYING NOTHING ABOUT QUVENZHANÉ WALLIS.

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What to do this Week in arts & culture

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WEDNESDAY FEB. 27 beer brawl IV [beer] Concordia Ale House hosts a blind tasting to pick the best of 12 beers from Oregon, California, Washington and Colorado. Concordia Ale House, 3276 NE Killingsworth St., 287-3929. 11 am-2:30 pm. Through Sunday, March 3. 21+. momIx [DANCe] Imaginative, colorful and athletic, Botanica offers a kaleidoscopic vision of nature, unfolding to a score encompassing everything from birdsong to electronica. Aided by creative costuming and Portland artist Michael Curry’s puppetry, Momix’s 10 dancers become birds, beasts and blooming branches. Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 245-1600. 7:30 pm. $26-$64.

THURSDAY FEB. 28 Varsity Cheerleader WereWolVes From outer spaCe [THeATer] but doesn’t the title explain it all? Written and directed by Steve Coker, this cabaret-comedy performance features roller-derby girls, parasitic aliens and lasershooting feline puppets as it pays homage to ’80s-era movies. Jack London Bar, 529 SW 4th Ave., 228-7605. 7:30 and 9:30 pm. $5.

the latin World’s ansWer to popular GrinGo entertainers. Who’s the Salvadoran Hulk Hogan? With a group of eight Latino comedians from Portland and California getting our attention with a show called Atención Gringo, we got curious enough to ask. So we tapped muy dulce comedienne Grace Sadie Cejas, who helped organize and will perform at the show, to tell us about some of the Latino world’s best-known entertainers. Here, then, are Cejas’ Latino equivalents to some well-known gringos.

the wise decision to wear masks at all times. So much mejor!

REGIS PHILBIN The Cuban Regis Philbin is a man named Raúl De Molina, best known for his part as the Fat Guy on the hit talk show El Gordo y la Flaca (literal translation: the Fat Man and the Skinny Lady.) Hopefully this is not a spoiler, but the show features a very large, disgruntled man and a pretty, cheerful lady.

ELVIS PRESLEY

LINDSAY LOHAN

SEAN PENN

The Latino Elvis is obvious; it has to be Shakira—her hips don’t lie and neither did the King’s.

Gloria Trevi, better known as one of Mexico’s legendary train wrecks. At her height, her 2011 album, Gloria, was No. 1 in Latin America; at her low, she and a backup singer were incarcerated in 2000 for corrupting minors. She was imprisoned for four years and eight months, and while locked up she snuck in her manager’s semen and became impregnated.

The Latin Sean Penn is Carlos Leon, a gorgeous Cuban personal trainer best known as the father of Madonna’s daughter Lourdes. Penn might have been the first to marry the now-infamous cougar, but Leon’s Latino sperm was the first to conquer her womb. And, personally, being half-Cuban, I can’t believe how goodlooking their child is. I’d kill to have half her looks. Seriously, I think I’m the whitest half-Cuban ever.

SARAH SILVERMAN Louis C.K., unbeknownst to most, is halfMexican and maintains dual citizenship with Mexico, and his first language is Spanish. Nothing makes me happier than a ginger Mexican.

BRANGELINA Ricarlos—that’s Ricky Martin and his partner, Carlos Gonzalez Abella. Just what Latin America needs: openly gay, proud Latino couples with lots of kids!

HULK HOGAN I’m pretty sure Hulk Hogan is the inspiration behind the lucha libre wrestling movement in Mexico. The costumes are a knockoff of Hogan’s sweet style. But after seeing that man’s face, the Mexicans made

go: Atención Gringo is at the bagdad Theater, 3702 Se Hawthorne blvd., 467-7521, on Friday, March 1. 8 pm. $5.

rakIm [MuSIC] They don’t call him the God MC for nothing. Any disciples of the church of hip-hop who skip seeing the man who first elevated rap lyricism to high art might as well excommunicate themselves. Dante’s, 350 W Burnside St., 226-6630. 9 pm. $18. 21+.

SATURDAY MARCH 2 skI the glade [SkI] Long ago, skiers went from the Timberline ski area to Government Camp without taking off their boots. Once a year, the historic 3-mile Glade Trail is opened and groomed. $100 includes breakfast, lunch and shuttle. Register at 272-3301. mthoodmuseum.org.

SUNDAY MARCH 3 yo gabba gabba! liVe! get the sillies out! [eDuTAINMeNT] Indoctrinating children into the hipster lifestyle since 2008, every alt-parent’s favorite kids show brings its colorful cast of characters (and biz Markie) to the stage, educating youngsters in person about the things that really matter—namely, DJ-ing, indie rock and biz Markie. Theater of the Clouds at Rose Garden, 1 N Center Court, 235-8771. 2 and 5 pm. $26-$46.

MONDAY MARCH 4 omsI scIence pub [SCIeNCe] Dr. Daniel L. Marks, a professor of pediatric endocrinology at OHSu, discusses high-fructose corn syrup. Leave the big Gulp in the car. Bagdad Theater, 3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 236-9234. 7 pm. $5. Minors permitted with guardian. Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

CULTURE

interview

WIL WHEATON W I lW h E AT o N . N E T

THE ICONIC GEEK TALKS ABOUT TABLETOP GAMING AND THE MERITS OF BEING A DOUCHEBAG.

wil wheatOn

BY r u t h Br own

rbrown@wweek.com

There was a time when Wil Wheaton was best known as a Teen Beat heartthrob or “that annoying kid from Star Trek.” Though he would forever be Gordie Lachance in moss-encrusted Oregon hearts, after a promising career as a child actor and a teenage stint as the widely hated boy wonder Wesley Crusher on Star Trek: The Next Generation, Wheaton largely disappeared from mainstream consciousness for two decades. But he didn’t go away. In his own little corner of the Internet, Wheaton was quietly but diligently forging a new public persona—one founded in his real identity as an affable everyman geek, instead of a meticulously coifed kid in a Starfleet uniform. He blogged candidly and prolifically, published several books, leant his voice to cartoons and video games, hosted podcasts, played professional poker, attended sci-fi and gaming conventions, and amassed more than 2 million followers on Twitter. Somewhere along the line, Wheaton emerged as a genuine cultural icon. Now 40, he creates and hosts a popular tabletop gaming show on YouTube, has his own plush toy and is all over your television again— most notably on the sitcom The Big Bang Theory, where he has a recurring role as a comically dark version of himself. This week, he visits Portland to perform a show with musical comedy duo Paul and Storm. Does he sing too? We called him to find out. 20

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

WW: Tell me about this show you’re doing in Portland. Wil Wheaton: A few years ago, Paul and Storm and [MythBusters’] Adam Savage and I created a show called w00tstock. The idea of the show was to get a bunch of nerds together to enjoy an evening of music and comedy and storytelling that is all centered on the nerdy things we all love so much. The show is immensely popular. We’ve toured it around the country. It’s become a fixture of San Diego Comic Con. But in the last couple of years, Adam and I have gotten really busy with our various television commitments, so it’s really hard to get everyone together to do w00tstock. But every now and then, my schedule works out so I can do a show with Paul and Storm. And we call it “Wil Wheaton vs. Paul and Storm.” So I write narrative nonfiction, tell stories about what it was like to grow up as a nerd on TV, tell stories about dating and Star Wars and all of the things that were a big part of my life growing up in the nerd subculture of Generation X. Paul and Storm play songs they normally play in their concerts, then I tell stories that I’ve written, then we do it together. They play music that goes with my stories. Then we sing a very long song about pirates. Let’s talk about “Tabletop.” Did you actually realize “half an hour of me playing board and card games with my friends” would be such a success? Because on paper, that’s a pretty hard sell. Yeah, I was pretty sure we were putting together something that was going to be very flexible and entertaining. I was inspired by Jon Favreau’s Dinner for Five, which aired on [IFC], and Celebrity Poker Showdown and World Poker Tour shows. I had in my head a very clear vision of combining two things that I think are really interesting: One is interesting people, who have fun stories to tell and who are great performers. Getting those people together always makes something cool happen. The other thing I wanted to do was show by example that playing tabletop games is wonderful and fun and social and positive, and it’s something I’ve been doing every week since I was 14.

lotta homes in America, which means you can watch things at a high resolution and not have to wait a long time for them to download. At the same time, the Internet lost the shackles of the computer, so you can watch things on your television that you would’ve needed your computer for just a few years ago. People who are creative decided instead of trying to fight for very limited time on broadcast television, just go online where you really don’t need to compete in the same way for viewers. And those viewers are able to watch the shows we create when they want to, where they want to, in a way that’s really convenient for them. This, I think, is really key to understanding how the entertainment industry needs to adapt or die. You’ve been back on TV in a big way these past few years, like The Big Bang Theory, Eureka and Leverage. There’s definitely been a trend toward playing…can I say jerks? Was that a deliberate creative move on your part? Yeah, that was a deliberate choice. This all started years ago; I kept having auditions to play roles that were very similar to the roles I played when I was a kid. When I was a kid, I played very sweet, sympathetic, heroic characters. And when I was going out for those roles as an adult, I never booked them. So I took a marketing class and learned a whole lot about

“I’vE FouNd my TyPE: my TyPE IS To PlAy ThAT guy you lovE To hATE.”

It seems like there’s been a massive renaissance lately in tabletop gaming. I don’t want to mistake correlation for causation, and anecdote is not data, but from what I’ve been able to tell, the [“Tabletop”] show has had a really positive effect on the games industry. We talk with distributors, and when we feature a game on the show, it sells out. There’s a lot of games that have had to go into multiple additional printings in order to meet with demand. I was thrilled with that. My ulterior motive with the show is to create more gamers.

marketing myself as an actor. The very short version is, everybody has a type that they play—once you know what your type is, you can focus on roles of that type. So my friend Kim Evey, who is a producer on “The Guild” and “Learning Town,” was doing a really funny [Web] show called the “Gorgeous Tiny Chicken Machine Show.” And she asked me if I would come be on it, and I said, “Yeah, will you have me play a super douchebag?” And she said, “Why?!” And I said, “I just have this feeling that playing a douchebag is what I’m supposed to do. I just feel like playing a nice guy doesn’t work anymore.” And she wrote me the part of this really douchey agent. And it was phenomenally popular. Then when Felicia [Day] asked me to do “The Guild,” I said, “Will you make me a douchebag?” She said, “Yeah, will you be a douchebag in a kilt?” “Absolutely!” Suddenly, playing characters who are very unlike me, I started getting hired all over the place. Getting cast in them all the time. And I’ve found my type: My type is to play that guy you love to hate. Read more of this interview at wweek.com.

2012 seemed like such a great year for Web series. Has Web TV finally come of age? A couple of things happened all around the same time. Very fast Internet is in a whole

GO: Wil Wheaton vs. Paul and Storm is at the Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St., 719-6055, albertarosetheatre.com, on Wednesday, Feb. 27. 8 pm. $20. 18+ and minors with parent or guardian.

FOOD & DRINK By ENID SPITZ. PRICES: $: Most entrees under $10. $$: $10-$20. $$$: $20-$30. $$$$: Above $30. Editor: MARTIN CIZMAR. Email: dish@wweek.com. See page 3 for submission instructions.

REVIEW V. K A P O O R

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

hot that she vomits. She hates riding in cars and dislikes loud noises. Response: She was willing to try Dawg Grog, but began licking her mouth like she was trying to get rid of the taste.

WEDNESDAY, FEB. 27 Beer Brawl VI

Concordia Ale House hosts its annual blind tasting to settle the score between Oregon, California, Washington and Colorado by taking the input of any and all patrons. Concordia Ale House, 3276 NE Killingsworth St., 287-3929. 11 am-2:30 am Wednesday-Friday, 9 am-2:30 am Saturday and 9 am-midnight Sunday, Feb. 27-March 3. Free. 21+.

Fortified Wine Class

Become a port snob, or just sip sherry, vermouth and dessert wines with sommelier Alan Stevens. Light bites included. Magnolia’s Corner, 4075 NE Sandy Blvd., 459-4081. 6 pm. $20. 21+.

THURSDAY, FEB. 28 Beer With the Bird

Local beer and cheese masters host a social at the hayloft-turned Rookery Bar in the historic Ladd Carriage House. Double Mountain Brewery and Logsdon Organic Farmhouse Ales are the brewers of honor, accompanied by Steve Jones and bites from his Cheese Bar. The Rookery Bar at Raven &Rose, 1331 SW Broadway, 222-7673. 5 pm. Prices vary. 21+.

FRIDAY, MARCH 1 City Light PDX Silent Disco

Cocktails, gambling and silent disco unite at this Monte Carlo-themed benefit. The first four mixed drinks are free with admission, a not-so-subtle sign this event is meant for partying. Mixologists will compete in an “iron bartender” competition. City Lights PDX, 525 NW 10th Ave. 7 pm-2 am. $35.

SATURDAY, MARCH 2 17th Annual Great Ball of Fire Finals

In February’s “Toughest Tongue” competition, Chris Amerson downed 24 balls of fire. It only takes five scorching habanero fritters to make the Wall of Flame, but Saturday’s final determines the “King or Queen of Heat.” Salvador Molly’s, 1573 SW Sunset Blvd., 297-9635. Noon. Free. All Ages.

SUNDAY, MARCH 3 Hawaiian Sunday Brunch

What happens when a tiki bar does brunch? Guava jam, grilled ham, gooey Swiss and Hawaiian French toast bathe together in maple syrup. Hale Pele, 2733 NE Broadway. 10 am-2 pm. Prices vary.

beggin’ siPs: What happens when five dogs walk into a bar.

POOCH HOOCH BEER FOR DOGS IS A FUNNY IDEA, BUT DO DOGS ACTUALLY LIKE IT? Everyone knows dogs like beer. Thing is, you’re not supposed to give it to them. The science is a little iffy—and anecdotes contradict claims that beer will harm your pooch—but giving a dog alcohol is generally frowned upon in polite society. Daniel Keeton smelled malty opportunity. Because the grains used to brew beer are worth little after their sugars have been sucked out for fermentation, they mostly end up as livestock feed. Dogs, of course, are a lot like furry little cattle. So Keeton combined some barley water with a little organic vegetable broth and packaged it in brown plastic bottles. He sells six-packs of nonalcoholic “Dawg Grog” for $36, including shipping. It won’t get your dog drunk, but it has gotten Keeton, who works as a bartender at Boneyard Brewery in Bend, publicity from the New York Daily News, Huffington Post and television stations across the country. Everyone had a chuckle, but no one asked the obvious question: Is this stuff any good? We paid the $36 and assembled a panel of five canine tasters—plus music editor Matthew Singer—to find out what dogs actually think of the stuff.

AMANDA BRECKER BLOSSOM ON SALE $ 1099 CD

MIA 5-year-old Cavalier King Charles Spaniel/poodle mix An aloof and demanding dog who will aggressively beg for belly scratches, Mia is a fan of salty foods as well as dirty socks and dead birds. When she comes across something really smelly, she tries to roll in it. Response: Mia liked the Dawg Grog the most of any pooch taste-tester. She even snouted her sister Lucy out of the way to lap up some from Lucy’s bowl. LUCY 4-year-old Shih Tzu/poodle mix An enthusiastic and sporty little dog, Lucy is an avid short-distance fetcher who is very drawn to sweet foods. She whines for ice cream and likes to sniff beer, especially stouts. She hates riding in the car at night. Response: Lucy took two quick licks and moved on from her own bowl, but did make a point of sniffing every other dog’s bowl to make sure she had the same thing. SYLVIE Almost-3-year-old whippet A sweet and sleepy couch potato who goes nuts for ice cream, Sylvie thinks she’s a lap dog. There’s nothing (except ice cream) that she loves more than to sit on your lap on the couch. Or to crawl into bed and sleep under the covers. She will stay at the bottom of the bed under the covers until she gets so

DUNKEL 5-year-old German shorthaired pointer mix. A perfect day in the life of Dunkel involves chasing squirrels in the park or, better yet, seagulls at the beach, begging for food (bacon! But anything meaty will do) and loving on his baby brother—a 13-month-old human. He’s a total bed hog. Response: This was Dunkel’s second encounter with Dawg Grog. Each time, after slurping a no-thank-you portion, he walked away. LILY 14-year-old beagle A mellow old lady, Lily likes sitting in her parents’ laps after dinner and licking their hands. When she had more teeth, she loved carrots, but now bananas go down easier. Sometimes she tries to climb into the dishwasher to lick the dirty plates. Lily sleeps more than a lazy teenage boy. Response: She took two sniffs of Dawg Grog, walked away and began licking the carpet. It must have had some effect: As the four other dogs sat obediently in their swivel chairs for photos, Lily repeatedly climbed onto the tabletop. MATT 30-year-old music editor A graying Italian-Australian mix with horrible eyesight and rapidly failing hearing, Matthew lives a mostly sedentary lifestyle, which he spends waiting for the day when it becomes socially acceptable to eat Peeps in public on days other than Easter. Response: Took a sip of Dawg Grog, determined it’s not quite as bad as drinking one’s own bile, then took another and realized that, actually, it is. Went back to his desk and quietly questioned his career choices. Martin Cizmar, Rebecca Jacobson, Ben Mollica, Brian Yaeger and Matthew Singer. bUY: Dawg Grog is available at dawggrog.com. For video, visit wweek.com.

Singer-songwriter Amanda Brecker pays homage to Carole King and James Taylor, and commemorates the 40th anniversary of “Tapestry”, with her beautiful CD “Blossom”, produced by Grammy winner Jesse Harris and featuring musicians from the original “Tapestry” recordings. The 12-song collection is a breath of fresh air in a noisy pop world. Brecker shows a graceful respect for the seminal music, infusing each track with a sweetness and delicate touch that is matched by the understated production. From ‘You’ve Got a Friend’ to ‘So Far Away’ to ‘It’s Too Late’, “Blossom” is filled with beloved songs that hearken back to another era. A bonus track, Brecker’s original ‘You Were Mine’, rounds out the winning collection.

OFFER GOOD THRU: 3/26/13

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

Willamette Week Date, 2008 wweek.com

MUSIC

FEB. 27–March 5 PROFILE

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

OVERTURE MEDIA

Prices listed are sometimes for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and socalled convenience charges may apply. Event lineups are subject to change after WW’s press deadlines. Editor: MATTHEW SINGER. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, go to wweek.com/ submitevents and follow submission directions. All shows should be submitted two weeks or more in advance of event. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: msinger@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

WEDNESDAY, FEB. 27 Dave Alvin and the Guilty Ones, Marshall Crenshaw

[OLD POP MEETS NEW TECH] Marshall Crenshaw’s a forward-facing pop classicist. Those early Buddy Holly comparisons were apt, but his songs revamped old sounds with a modern mindset and sonic gloss. Three decades into a career that’s taken place largely under the radar, his newest venture is likewise both up to the minute and rooted in rock ’n’ roll’s past. It’s a series of 10-inch vinyl EPs, each featuring one new Crenshaw original, one reworking of an earlier song from his catalog and a classic cover tune. The project’s definitely somewhat nostalgic in nature, but the old-school approach was initially funded through a Kickstarter campaign, and the EPs are sold online via a three-disc-peryear subscription. Once and future Blaster Dave Alvin, meanwhile, isn’t compelled to be contemporary: His rural rock roots remain firmly fixed to the earth. JEFF ROSENBERG. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave., 2349694. 8 pm. $25. 21+.

The Slackers, the Sentiments

VEGASWORLDINC

[SUIT-UP SKA] It seems unlikely for any ska band that came to prominence in the ’90s to have aged gracefully, but the Slackers are actually cooler now than they were in the heyday of Reel Big Fish and Goldfinger. The soulful, horn-driven New York City band— which owes as much of a debt to Sam Cooke, Charles Mingus and the Beach Boys as it does to the Skatalites—has proven to be an indestructible touring force over the past three decades. More impressively, a handful of the Slackers’ early records—including 1998 double-album The Question, soon to be reissued on vinyl—have grown more endearing with age, and seem prime candidates for the kind of rediscovery the Specials and Madness enjoyed at the crest of ska’s largely forgettable “third wave.” CASEY JARMAN. Branx, 320 SE 2nd Ave., 234-5683. 8 pm. $12 advance, $14 day of show. All ages.

Starfucker, Blackbird Blackbird

[ELECTRO-POP] Josh Hodges of Starfucker (now commonly spelled STRFKR outside Portland) is at a crossroads. His band’s electro-pop innocence struck gold when it first premiered in 2007, but groups like MGMT and Passion Pit have taken it to another level, adding layers of emotional depth to the music. That’s the challenge here: Can a band that has built itself on playfulness and simplicity make a more mature, artistic record? It’s still uncertain whether Miracle Mile, the group’s latest, achieves this, but there’s no denying that Hodges’ sensibility for weirdly assembled dance records is still there. For years, these songs have helped turn the group’s live performances into sweat-slathered romps—whether at PDX Pop Now! or the Belmont Pool Party. This show will undoubtedly be similar, which is why the band, regardless of which direction it goes, will always be loved in Stumptown. REED JACKSON. Roseland Theater, 8 NW 6th Ave., 224-2038. 8 pm. $15. All ages.

THURSDAY, FEB. 28 Blues Control, Plankton Wat, Fang Moon

[WANDERING EXPLORERS] Less than 3,000 people live in Coopersburg, Penn., and two of them are Blues Control’s Russ Waterhouse and Lea Cho. To call the duo “experimental” would suggest it explores new territory, which it doesn’t. Instead, Cho peers so closely at just a few baroque chords with her hypnotic piano that she gets under pop’s skin, while Waterhouse applies an intravenous anesthetic of sloshing tape sounds, steely Zeppelin guitar riffs and synthesizer wanderings. Their latest effort, Valley Tangents, leans toward their impressionist and jazz-fusion influences, especially on the driving opener, “Love’s a Rondo.” The incessant background buzz has mellowed, and piano and guitar sounds are cleaner. Maybe

TOP FIVE

CONT. on page 24

BY S LE EP (O LDOMI N I ON / TH E CH ICH AR ON ES)

TOP FIVE FAVORITE RAKIM LYRICS “Even if it’s jazz or the quiet storm/ I hook a beat up, convert it into hip-hop form.” —“I Ain’t No Joke” (Paid in Full, 1987) “Thinkin’ of a master plan/ ’Cause ain’t nothin’ but sweat inside my hand.” —“Paid in Full” (Paid in Full) “Pull out my weapon and start to squeeze/ A magnum as a microphone murderin’ MCs.” —“Follow the Leader” (Follow the Leader, 1988) “I’m the arsenal/ I got artillery, lyrics of ammo/ Rounds of rhythm/ Then I’m ’a give ’em piano.” —“Let the Rhythm Hit ’Em” (Let the Rhythm Hit ’Em, 1990) “I grew up on the sidewalk/ Where I learned street talk/ And then taught to hawk New York.” —“Juice (Know the Ledge)” (Don’t Sweat the Technique, 1992) SEE IT: Rakim plays Dante’s, 350 W Burnside St., with Sleep, Cool Nutz, Serge Severe, Half Man Half, Destro and L-Pro, on Thursday, Feb. 28. 9 pm. $18. 21+.

JESUS FREAKS IN A SECULAR CITY, KUTLESS WORSHIPS IN THE OPEN—TO THE TUNE OF 3 MILLION RECORDS SOLD. BY JOr Da N Gr EEN

243-2122

Chances are, you’ve never heard of Kutless. That’s an odd statement to make about a band that, since forming in 1999, has sold more than 3.5 million albums. But Kutless might just be Portland’s most un-Portland band. Its sound is heavily produced Christian praise and worship filtered through a hard-rock edge. The band’s official bio is laced with evangelical jargon. Its members wear the sort of long, swept hair preferred by megachurch pastors. It exists a world away from the experimental, do-it-yourself and definitively secular aesthetic of the city’s most popular acts. At least, that’s how it seems. But while the band’s church-heavy lyrics may be rare to the Rose City music scene, its connection to Christianity is not. In actuality, Portland music is rife with musicians who grew up within the church. Bands like Menomena and the Robinsons have well-documented ties to Christianity, even if their music is a far cry from the slick sound of a band like Kutless. “What Kutless represents is the style of Christianity Portland despises,” says Todd Fadel, a Christian who ran all-ages clubs the Meow Meow and the Push in the ’90s and early 2000s. “I think a lot of Christians, if they would even call themselves that, that are doing music here are what I call ‘live and let live’ Christians. They aren’t out to evangelize. They aren’t out to use their music as some sort of ministry tool.” But that’s precisely what Kutless is out to do. The band, born in the basement of Warner Pacific College, didn’t begin with the goal of playing massive venues and festivals. The goal was to tell people about Jesus, to build a ministry. Even so, James Mead, the band’s guitairst, claims Portland was integral in developing the Kutless ethos. “We’ve very much avoided the move to Nashville or getting too entrenched in that scene,” he says. “Being from Portland and staying here, and having

the covering of our church and family here at home has always been really important to us because it’s part of our identity. I think people from Portland can understand that.” He says the city has shaped the band’s sound, as well: “Creatively, I think this environment is sort of a muse. Living in an area I’d describe as a great mission field has been influential for us, too. We don’t rest on our laurels when we’re at home, you know? We know it’s all about being Christ-like and peaceful even to our next-door neighbors, and being people who are representing the Gospel, even if we’re just standing out by our mailbox chatting with other parents on the street.” Fadel agrees with Mead that, despite conventional thought, Portland is a beautiful place to grow up a believer. Why, then, do so many local musicians opt to conceal their faith? The causes of that secularization are fairly simple. Young church attendees are exposed to choir or worship bands very early on. Often, they begin performing music live in high school. As their tastes evolve, the Christian music scene becomes stifling, and many leave the church in favor of creative potential elsewhere. If Christian musicians feel the need to downplay their faith, it is usually because that faith can be so easily hijacked and misrepresented by a church thirsting for cultural legitimacy. Even the most tenuous of lyrical themes can lead to a band being labeled “Christian,” resulting in moralistic expectations from more traditional churchgoers and innate distrust from those outside the church wary of sermonizing. Fadel says being a Christian in Portland means being constantly confronted with beliefs and ideas vastly different from the theology espoused throughout the Bible belt. But he wishes Christians outside the city would stop viewing Portland as—to use Mead’s phrase—a “mission field.” To him, it’s the other way around. “The church has a lot to learn from Portland,” Fadel says, “about community, about family, about accepting those that are castoffs and people no one is making room for. Portland is extravagant about making room for everyone. You know, all the stuff the church should be doing.” SEE IT: The Rock & Worship Roadshow, featuring Kutless, MercyMe, Jeremy Camp, Tedashii and more, is at the Rose Garden Arena, 1 Center Court, on Friday, March 1. 7:30 pm. $10. All ages. Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

Wednesday, February 27

$5.00 at the door. 9pm. 21 & Over Random Axe •The Kilowatt Hour • Debrailler

Thursday, February 28

5PM Free Pinball Feeding Frenzy!!! FREE! 5pm. 21 & Over Every Thursday at 5, we drop a handful of free games onto each of our 8 pinballs. First come, ﬁrst served for a free pinball feeding frenzy!!!

Thursday, February 28 9pm. 21 & Over Qwong • Lord Master

Friday, March 1

8pm (doors open at 7pm). All Ages Broken Water • Older Women • Hugo Berli • Havania Whaal This is an all ages show that will be held in the DIY space. $3-$5 sliding scale for show. No cover for bar with ID.

Saturday, March 2

5pm. All Ages Lauren Zuniga • Felecia and the Dinosaur • Delaney & Paris • Kiya Devolt Lauren is one of the top five ranked slam poets in the nation and author of “The Smell of Good Mud” on Write Bloody Press. This is an all ages event in the DIY space. Bar open w/ ID.

Saturday, March 2

$5.00 at the door. 9pm. 21 & Over Countdown to Armageddon • Peroxide • Moral Hex

Sunday, March 3

FREE! 7pm. All Ages The Church of RnR Presents... Doug’s Birthday!!! Sad Horse • Voices

Tuesday, March 5 FREE! 9pm. 21 & Over Breeeowr!!! F*ckenwaaah!!!

Teams compete by trying to name classic rock and punk songs based on snippets of guitar solos. The two high scoring teams go head-to-head, and the champion team sends one member up against the clock for a chance to win $50 by naming 7 songs in 45 seconds. No pre-registration needed. Just grab up to four of yr friends and show up.

Within Spitting Distance of The Pearl

1033 NW 16th Ave. 971.229.1455 Everyday Noon - 2:30am Happy Hour

Mon - Fri noon-7pm • Sat - Sun 3-7pm Pop-A-Shot • Pinball Skee-ball • Air Hockey • Free Wi-Fi

thursday-friday

Blues Control is an explorer, because this tangent stays right on course. MITCH LILLIE. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 9 pm. $6-$8. 21+.

Toro y Moi, Sinkane, Dog Bite

[STRAIGHT CLUBBING] Berkeley, Calif.-based musician and producer Chaz Bundick has bobbled around a bit as far as musicianship goes. He’s crafted catchy, accessible beats, experimental psych pop and serene, sample-heavy electronica. With latest disc Anything in Return, a house influence looms. It feels like Bundick is scoring the beats and background fare for the next underground hip-hop prodigy. Toro y Moi’s newest stance is painfully groovy, with a nod to disco and Saturday night DJ sets. With a release like this, it’s only a matter of time before the sampler becomes the sampled. MARK STOCK. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., 284-8686. 8 pm. $15. All ages.

FRIDAY, MARCH 1 Sapient

[HIP-HOP OR NOT?] Is Marcus Williams a rapper with indie-rock aspirations or an indie rocker with a hip-hop jones? Maybe he’s something else altogether. As a producer and MC, Sape’s always pushed boundaries. On his latest album, Slump, he eliminates them entirely. As a member of the sprawling Sandpeople crew, he’s primarily known for his eclectic production style, stitching together cutup, Flying Lotus-esque beatscapes, neck-breaking G-funk and synth-driven indie electro. Slump, however, is something else, featuring strummed acoustic guitars and more singing than rapping, while still beating with a hip-hop pulse. It’s very much of-the-moment, as the rap and indie worlds are colliding and blending at a greater rate than ever, except the convergence of influences is embodied in a single, talented songsmith. MATTHEW SINGER. Branx, 320 SE 2nd Ave., 234-5683. 7 pm. $9 advance, $12 day of show. All ages.

Vinnie Paz and Ill Bill, TxE, Onlyone

[HARDCORE HIP-HOP] There was a time when grimy New York rap dictated the rules of the hip-hop genre. If MCs were too pop or didn’t have the hardcore street lyricism of an M.O.P. or a Mobb Deep, they were labeled outsiders—cardboard cutouts created by the record industry. Times have changed: Hip-hop has moved away from the street and more into experimentalism. A few N.Y. MCs still hold onto that aggressive mindset, though, including Ill Bill and Vinnie Paz. Both rappers have made careers of spitting hardcore realism over boom-bap beats. It made sense that the two would team up for an album, 2011’s Heavy Metal Kings, the follow-up soon to be released. But just like their predecessors, it’s when the two MCs step back from the violence and examine why it’s occurring that they are the most poignant. REED JACKSON. Dante’s, 350 W Burnside St., 2266630. 9 pm. $15. 21+.

Laura Gibson, Nick Jaina, Daniel Hunt

[FOLK] Laura Gibson is coming home. After spending the past year touring across the country, Europe and even South Africa in support of her uncharacteristically rough-and-tumble 2012 album, La Grande—and the past few weeks out near Sisters, Ore., performing a residency at Dan Wieden’s Caldera arts camp—the countryfolk singer-songwriter is returning to Portland for her first headlining solo gig in a while. Although she’s become something of a national artist, recognized for her fine vocals and delicately rootsy arrangements, she’s also solidified her position as a local institution, and one of the city’s standout talents. MATTHEW SINGER. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 9 pm. $15. 21+.

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

PROFILE B AT T L E M E .T V

MUSIC

BATTLEME SATURDAY, MARCH 2 [BASEMENT MIXTAPE] In the fall of 2009, Matt Drenik, then the frontman for Austinbased band Lions, was about to head to the United Kingdom for the biggest tour of his career. Two weeks before leaving, he lost sight in his left eye. “I was thinking, ‘I’m going blind, I’m going blind. What am I going to fucking do?’” Drenik says. Utterly freaked out and distracted, he trudged through the chain of shows with blackness encroaching on his vision. But the tour marked a turning point in the 33-year-old’s life and, subsequently, the beginning of his current project, Battleme. Written in 2010 and released last April, Battleme’s self-titled debut encapsulates a time of rebirth, transition and introspection. “I had all these things to say, and I wanted to get everything out because I thought that maybe this would be my last chance,” Drenik says. Fearing the permanent loss of his sight, he composed a genreless mixtape of everything he felt driven to record, taking hold of his longtime passion for pure and simplistic songwriting. Originally from Ohio, Drenik spent his late teenage years poking around various colleges and penning acoustic-guitar tunes alone in his dorm-room closet. After dropping out of schools in Florida and Boston, he moved to Austin on his 21st birthday and shyly played open-mic nights and solo sets, often performing Elliott Smith covers. Eventually forming Lions in 2005, Drenik quickly found himself immersed in complicated, guitar-driven rock music. “I was an angry 23-year-old kid,” he says. “I had a Big Muff [distortion pedal] sitting around, and I just turned it on because I was wanting to get after it and play aggressive.” Always resisting the urge to settle on one style of music, Drenik continued writing his own songs on the side, which were often mellower and more eclectic. “My dad was into the Temptations, my brother was into punk rock and the Grateful Dead at the same time, and my other brother was a New Order dude,” he says. “It was all cool to me. It was all just there for the taking.” When Lions returned from its U.K. tour, Drenik was diagnosed with uveitis, a condition that causes eye inflammation. He quit the band, moved to Portland to be with his then-girlfriend—now his wife—and began a long ordeal of tests and treatments with an ophthalmologist. That summer was both physically grueling and creatively explosive for Drenik. “I just sat in the basement writing weird songs,” he says. “Holed up day after day with minimal recording gear and his eyes at their worst, he tracked about 40 songs that were later whittled down to Battleme’s first full-length. With production help from Thomas Turner (of Ghostland Observatory) and support from Drenik’s label, Trashy Moped, Battleme’s LP plays like a time capsule filled with moments of hardship, questioning and discovery. Musically, between the slow acoustic ease of “Trouble,” the droning distortion in “Woman, I’m a Lost Cause,” and the electro-pop vibe of “Touch,” there isn’t one cohesive narrative. And that’s the point. “I look at it like albums are my voice,” says Drenik, whose eyesight has since improved. “That was the trip I was on at that time.” EMILEE BOOHER. how losing his sight helped Matt drenik find his voice.

SEE IT: Battleme plays Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water Ave., with Bike Thief, on Saturday, March 2. 9 pm. $7. 21+.

FRIDAY-SUNDAY

SATURDAY, MARCH 2 Hey Marseilles

[ORCHESTRAL FOLK] Over the past four years, the career of Seattle’s Hey Marseilles has steadily gained momentum. With the upcoming release of its sophomore LP, Lines We Trace, the band has reached a sound more settled than its first album’s saturated odes to wanderlust. The sextet’s most defining characteristics have always been lush and sweeping layers of violin, cello, accordion and various acoustic instruments that push and pull their way around frontman Matt Bishop’s folky vocals. But where the group’s first record often overloaded the senses, Lines We Trace finds a balance between grand crescendos and subdued instrumentation. EMILEE BOOHER. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave., 234-9694. 8 pm. $12 advance, $15 day of show. Under 21 permitted with legal guardian.

Eight Bells, the Body, Sedan, Usnea

[BLACKENED METAL] Psych rock’s loss was black metal’s gain. The music world may have stung a bit from the breakup of the great SubArachnoid Space in 2010, but the blow was cushioned instantly by the emergence of Eight Bells, featuring SAS guitarist Melynda Jackson and drummer Chris Van Huffel. This new group allows those two, along with bassist Haley Westeiner, to get even heavier than their previous outfit, but with silvery bits of spaced-out rock curling around the edges of the trio’s smoldering sound. Tonight, Eight Bells plays in celebration of its first full-length, The Captain’s Daughter, recently released on local label Seventh Rule. ROBERT HAM. Backspace, 115 NW 5th Ave., 248-2900. 8 pm. $7.

Alabama Shakes, Michael Kiwanuka, Sam Doores and Riley Downing [STAX FIFTH AVENUE] The little-

MUSIC

band-that-could of 2012, Alabama Shakes leapt from the backwaters of Dixie to collect Grammy nods, celebrity fans and a cultural ubiquity yet to crest, while serving testament to the undying primacy of that old-time rock ’n’ soul. If the band’s tale sounds familiar, the well-worn riﬀs of last spring’s debut full-length, Boys & Girls, hinted at cover-band origins a bit too clearly. Still, an apprenticeship hawking shit-kicker standards doubtlessly sharpened the troupe’s dual-guitar swagger and focused the bottomless ferocity of frontwoman Brittany Howard, and a trail of breathless converts from this sold-out tour proves well enough there’s life in the old songs yet. JAY HORTON. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 225-0047. 9 pm. Sold out. All ages.

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B.B. King

[THE BLUES] You know you are a music legend when virtually any compliment anyone gives you tends to border on hyperbole. Such is life for B.B. King. Arguably the greatest blues guitar player ever (see?)—and certainly the most popular—he has done much to bring the genre into the mainstream throughout his 60-plus years as a musician. At age 87, he still plays more than 100 shows a year and feels the blues rattling around in his bones as deeply as ever. BRIAN PALMER. Roseland Theater, 8 NW 6th Ave., 224-2038. 8 pm. Sold out. 21+.

SUNDAY, MARCH 3 Why?

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MarchFourth Marching Band at Tom McCall Waterfront Park during an Iraq War protest, March 20, 2003. “The band was put together for a party on March 4, 2003. On March 20, we joined the anti-Iraq War protest, figuring that we just learned these seven songs, and since we called ourselves a ‘marching band,’ maybe we should get out there and march. This photo was taken at the waterfront. From there we marched through downtown for three hours. I remember playing the bassline of a Fela Kuti song for 20-plus minutes straight, in the rain. But something magical happened that day, because it was this experience that made us think, ‘Maybe we should become a real band.’” —John Averill, MarchFourth bassist SEE IT: MarchFourth Marching Band’s 10-Year Anniversary Extravaganza is at Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., on Sunday and Monday, March 3-4. Multiple showtimes and ticket prices. Call 225-0047 for information.

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comInG soon: uli jon roth · Swingin' utterS · anberlin · g-eazy · murS Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

503.288.3895 3939 N. Mississippi info@mississippistudios.com

8pm doors/ 9pm show BarBar all ages until 9pm 21+ unless otherwise noted

opbmusic Presents PDX/Rx: Folk artists rocking orchestral arrangements and modern instrumentation

Experimental Portland Presents: Mixed garagerock, sound effects and ambient world-music

ALAMEDA BLUES CONTROL HOLIDAY FRIENDS PHEASANT

Wed, Feb 27

FREE!

KZME Presents: Illuminating and spectral folk from a luminous PDX artist

PLANKTON WAT FANG MOON DJ OWEN STOKES

(of LED ER EST)

Thu, Feb 28

$6 Adv

Unstoppable rhythms of psychedelic rock

LAURA GIBSON MASERATI NICK JAINA DANIEL HUNT

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Fri, Mar 1

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Electric pop from a Brooklyn three-piece

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Alt country & folk from Old 97’s superstar

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COTTON NATHANIEL Record Release JONES TALBOT QUARTET MISSION SPOTLIGHT

Tue, Mar 5

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Bluegrass, delta blues, and Appalachian mountain music from a one-of-a kind trio

BEN MILLER BAND

SWANSEA Wed, Mar 6

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ED & THE RED REDS Thu, Mar 7

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Quintet melding the deep grooves of blues & R&B

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Texas rock-n-roll from a visionary classic

JOE ELY DUO

Sat, Mar 9

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tickets available at MississippiStudios.com 26

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

sunday-tuesday

memories and crippling anxieties, all rolled up together—you’d be hard-pressed to discover a group more anal than this one. The tight focus and tighter musicianship usually hint at something majestic— as is the case on last year’s excellent Mumps, Etc.—and it’s easy to find oneself standing slack-jawed at the intersection of Wolf’s self-deprecating free-association raps and his band’s moody, baroque sound. CASEY JARMAN. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., 284-8686. 7:30 pm. $14 advance, $15 day of show. All ages.

INFRASTRUCTURE E vA L A x E R

MUSIC

MONDAY, MARCH 4 Rhett Miller, Erin McKeown

[POP MEETS AMERICANA] Rhett Miller, frontman of beloved altcountry guitar band the Old 97’s, continues to cut his own path through a solo career that’s stretched for more than 10 years now. His most recent effort, 2012’s The Dreamer, is full of songs laced with slide guitar and intricate acoustic chords, showcasing his Americana leanings more so than his previous solo releases. Miller’s an affable performer known for connecting with his audience and embodying the sincerity and spirit of his own lyrics. For those wanting to hear his whole catalog—from his dreamy first solo single, “Come Around,” back in 2002 up to the present— and maybe a dash of the Old 97’s, trust that he’s probably already anticipated such a desire and is ready to fulfill it. NILINA MASONCAMPBELL. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 8 pm. $13-$15. 21+.

TUESDAY, MARCH 5 White Lung, Arctic Flowers

[PUNK ROCK] Once upon a time, the punk genre was an outlet for new ideas and expression. Of course, we can blame the commodification of punk fashion and culture through mall stores and Warped Tours. But the responsibility for expanding the art form has always been in the underground and on the shoulders of youth. Tonight’s compact lineup at Bunk Bar might not be breaking any molds, but it is an excellent example of two acts that bring purity and class to modern punk music. White Lung hails from British Columbia and boasts a brash West Coast sound that weds muscular riffs with feedback and crowd sweat. Portland’s Arctic Flowers, meanwhile, draw influence from the British post-punk scene. NATHAN CARSON. Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water Ave., 894-9708. 8 pm. $8. 21+.

Cotton Jones, Mission Spotlight

[PSYCH FOLK] To quote an iTunes customer review about Michael Nau of Cotton Jones, the band leader is “still the man who musically helps you come down from your bad trip.” Referring to the group’s 2010 album, Tall Hours in the Glowstream, that comment sums up the surreal, homecoming vibe of the Maryland-based band’s music, which mixes together washed-out guitar, psychedelic keys, worn-in male and female vocals and quirky lo-fi textures. Only releasing a handful of songs during the past couple years, including the EP Sit Beside Your Vegetables and limited-edition 7-inch About the Game, the group stayed busy on the road in 2012 with its well-suited tourmates, Dr. Dog. Now we just have to keep our fingers crossed for more tunes to bring us down from the bad trip of not having enough Cotton Jones. EMILEE BOOHER. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 9 pm. $12.

PAUL LAXER (PRODUCER) The past year of Paul Laxer’s life is coming down to four plinking piano notes. It’s a chilly Thursday afternoon, and the 28-year-old producer is in his Northeast Portland mixing studio, putting the final touches on the new album by Typhoon—a record the band, for which Laxer is something of a “fifth Beatle,” started demoing in January 2012. He is hoping to finally sign off on it tonight. All that’s left to do is perfect the transition out of the ringing guitar that concludes one track into the four piano notes introducing the next. Since Tuesday, Laxer has been fielding phone calls and emailed sound files from the engineer in New York he hired to master the album, trying to get the volume levels on that five-second sliver of music exactly how it sounds in his head. It seems like a superfluous thing to spend two days haggling over, but this is, by far, the most important project Laxer has ever been involved with. He thinks this could be the album to launch the beloved Portland chamber-pop ensemble nationally, and every last detail must be right. “If you think small, you get small,” Laxer says, staring at his computer screen as he opens the latest mix. “If you think big, you get big.” Thinking big is Laxer’s preferred mode of operation. He isn’t a Steve Albini type of producer, who takes pride in capturing the raw energy of a band playing live in a room. If an artist is looking to knock out an album over a weekend, he’ll suggest someone else. Laxer prefers to take his time, meticulously building each song up from its skeletal foundation into a gleaming tower of sound. That makes him the ideal producer for a group like Typhoon, which, with 13 members, is more orchestra than rock band. He met the band when he moved to Portland four years ago, fresh out of audio engineering school in Atlanta. He recorded Typhoon’s 2010 album, Hunger and Thirst, and based on that record scored gigs recording Aan, Brainstorm, Ben Darwish, Horse Feathers’ Sam Cooper and others—enough to quit his day job and go into production full-time. But this latest Typhoon album, Laxer says, “is miles above everything else I’ve done.” It’s his attempt to erase all remnants of the band’s house-show roots and nudge it toward the masses. In other words, he’s taking a big band, and making it sound even bigger. He queues up a new song, a booming anthem based around an angular, almost glam-y guitar riff from songwriter Kyle Morton. Laxer then opens a program on his computer and displays the sum of its parts: more than 100 individual tracks, including violins, dual kick drums, multiple tambourines, explosion effects and a keyboard part Morton practiced for weeks that appears on the song for only a few seconds. And that’s just the intro. “It’s a new sound for us, and I’m very aware of that,” Laxer says. “I think we’re going to lose some fans, but I think we’re going to gain a lot more. I’m willing to take the blame for it, though.” MATTHEW SINGER. typhoon’s in-house producer readies his masterpiece.

VISIT: Paul Laxer is at paullaxer.wordpress.com.

ON SALE NOW

FRIDAY, MAY 10 Showtime: 8:00pm

ARLENE SCHNITZER CONCERT HALL

Buy tickets online at www.pcpa.com By Phone: 800-273-1530 at the PCPA Box Office or at TicketsWest Outlets PRESENTED BYY

Willamette Week Date, 2008 wweek.com

MUSIC CALENDAR = WW Pick. Highly recommended. Editor: Jonathan Frochtzwajg. TO HAVE YOUR EVENT LISTED, send show information at least two weeks in advance on the web at wweek.com/submitevents or (if you book a specific venue) enter your events at dbmonkey.com/wweek. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: music@wweek.com. For more listings, check out wweek.com.

[FEB. 27-MARCH 5] Al’s den at the Crystal Hotel

Mississippi Pizza

Alberta Rose Theatre

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Blues Control, Plankton Wat, Fang Moon

303 SW 12th Ave. A Simple Colony

3000 NE Alberta St. Michael Gordon, Julia Wolfe

Andina JUSTINE MURPHY

1314 NW Glisan St. Nat Hulskamp Trio

Ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. Shut Your Animal Mouth, Black Beast Revival, Cornshed, Brothers of the Last Watch

backspace

115 NW 5th Ave. Jack Ruby Presents, Melville, Twisted Whistle

biddy McGraw’s

6000 NE Glisan St. Beautiful Grateful Dead Jam

Camellia Lounge 510 NW 11th Ave. Anandi and Steve Christofferson

Chapel Pub

430 N Killingsworth St. Steve Kerin

Corkscrew Wine bar 1669 SE Bybee Blvd. RedRay Frazier

dante’s

350 W Burnside St. Rakim, Cool Nutz, Sleep (of Oldominion), The Rundown featuring SERGE SEVERE, Half man Half, Destro & L Pro, DJ Spark

doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Tango Alpha Tango, Worth, The Horde and the Harem

duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. Nathan James and the Rhythm Scratchers

east end

203 SE Grand Ave. Sweat It! - Noah Sweat

Goodfoot Lounge

2845 SE Stark St. Scott Pemberton Trio

Hawthorne Theatre Lounge

HAndS ACROSS AMeRICA: eight bells plays backspace on Saturday, March 2. Read Robert Ham’s review of the band’s debut album, The Captain’s Daughter, at wweek.com.

Wed. Feb. 27 Al’s den at the Crystal Hotel 303 SW 12th Ave. A Simple Colony

Uli Jon Roth, Stone Senate, Witch Mountain, Holy Grove

Davey Suicide, Toxic Zombie, Amerakin Overdose

Sense One, The Dirtmerchant

Hawthorne Theatre

Mt. Tabor Theater Lounge

2026 NE Alberta St. L’Roneous, Monster’s Inc., Spank Pops, Def Rare, 2bers

3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Uli Jon Roth, Stone Senate, Witch Mountain, Holy Grove

Holocene

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Davey Suicide, Toxic Zombie, Amerikin, Overdose

1314 NW Glisan St.

1001 SE Morrison St. The Lower 48, Hustle and Drone, Pictorials

Jason Okamoto

Jimmy Mak’s

8 NW 6th Ave. Starfucker, Blackbird Blackbird

Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. Dave Alvin and the Guilty Ones, Marshall Crenshaw

Andina

Ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. Velvet Acid Christ, The Twighlight Garden, Dead When I Found Her

branx

320 SE 2nd Ave. The Slackers, the Sentiments

doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Sun Angle, Grandparents, Death Songs

east end

203 SE Grand Ave. Ghostfoot, Verner Pantons

Goodfoot Lounge

2845 SE Stark St. Naive Melodies, Philly’s Phunkestra

Hawthorne Theatre

3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

221 NW 10th Ave. The Mel Brown Quartet

Kells

112 SW 2nd Ave. Dave Ross

Laughing Horse books 12 NE 10th Ave. Tiny Moving Parts, Our First Brains

LaurelThirst

2958 NE Glisan St. Papa Coyote (9 pm); Wayward Vessel (6 pm)

Roseland Theater

Rotture

315 SE 3rd Ave. Krieg, Icon of Phobus, Sein Und Zeit, Panzergod

Shaker and Vine

2929 SE Powell Blvd. Jeff Campbell

Slabtown

1033 NW 16th Ave. Random Axe, The Kilowatt Hour, Debrailler

Suki’s bar & Grill

Lents Commons

2401 SW 4th Ave. Positive Vibrations

Mississippi Studios

2016 NE Sandy Blvd. The Fenix Project

9201 SE Foster Road Open Mic

The blue diamond

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Alameda, Holiday Friends, Pheasant

The blue Monk

Mount Tabor Theater

The Crown Room

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

3341 SE Belmont St. Barlow Pass 205 NW 4th Ave.

The Know

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Psychopomp: Ogo Eion

The Old Church

1422 SW 11th Ave. David Rothman

Thorne Lounge

4260 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Musician’s Open Mic

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. Bill Portland

Tube

18 NW 3rd Ave. Ghost Mom, Therapists, Sad Horse, Needles & Pizza, DJ Identical Twin

Vie de boheme

1530 SE 7th Ave. Tim Snider & the Ribner Bros

White eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Welfare, Brave Julius, Stein

THuR. Feb. 28

1503 SE Cesar E. Chavez Ave. King Ghidora, Ether Circus

Hawthorne Theatre

3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Swingin’ Utters, Wild Roses, Royal Tees, 48 Thrills

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. Laid out: Gossip Cat, Pocket Rock-it, Misti Miller, Hold my Hand

Ivories Jazz Lounge and Restaurant

1435 NW Flanders St. Laura Stilwell with Tom Grant

3552 N Mississippi Ave. Shalena Macavei

Mississippi Studios

Mount Tabor Theater

Kenton Club

2025 N Kilpatrick St. On Holiday, Young Dad

LaurelThirst

2958 NE Glisan St. Ridgerunners: Lynn Conover, Dan Haley, Tim Acott Band (9:30 pm); the Left Coast Roasters (6 pm)

branx

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. The Breaking Yard, Teri Untalan

buffalo Gap Saloon

O’Connor’s Vault

Camellia Lounge

7850 SW Capitol Highway Kathy James Sextet

510 NW 11th Ave. Brooks Robertson Trio

Red Room

Club 21

2035 NE Glisan St. P.R.O.B.L.E.M.S., The Thornes, The Gnash, The Fuckin’ Fucks

2530 NE 82nd Ave. Moothart, Whiskeys Lament, Autumn Wasteland, Uncle Rat

Savoy Tavern & Lounge 2500 SE Clinton St. Gallop

Shaker and Vine

2929 SE Powell Blvd. Matthew Gailey, John Dover Quartet

Slabtown

1033 NW 16th Ave. Qwong, Lord Master

Someday Lounge 125 NW 5th Ave. Phoenix Fundraiser

The blue diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd. Ben Jones

The blue Monk

3341 SE Belmont St. Michael The Blind & The Els, Rachel Taylor Brown

The Know

6835 SW Macadam Ave. The Fashion Nuggets

Tony Starlight’s

3728 NE Sandy Blvd. Liz Bacon

Tony Starlight’s

3728 NE Sandy Blvd. Liz Bacon and Jon Stuber

Torta Landia

4144 SE 60th Ave. Brian Francis and the FoPo Follies - Brian Francis

Valentine’s

232 SW Ankeny St. Tender Love & Care

Vie de boheme 1530 SE 7th Ave. Matthew Heller

White eagle Saloon

Wonder ballroom

FRI. MARCH 1 Al’s den at the Crystal Hotel 303 SW 12th Ave. A Simple Colony

Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. Tyrone Wells

Andina

1314 NW Glisan St. JB Butler Trio

Ash Street Saloon 225 SW Ash St.

Music Millennium

3158 E Burnside St. Fallen Riviera

Original Halibut’s II

2527 NE Alberta St. Steve Kerin and Jim Miller

Record Room

8 NE Killingsworth St. Sun Foot, Fred Meyer, Rttledick

Red Room

116 SE Yamhill St. Fusion: Birds of Paradise

350 W Burnside St. Vinnie Paz and Ill Bill, TxE, Onlyone

doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Ramona Falls, Social Studies

duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. Deke Dickerson (9 pm); The Hamdogs (6 pm)

east end

203 SE Grand Ave. Three Four Teens, The Last 45’s, ManX

2505 SE 11th Ave. Katie Roberts, Eagles of Freedom

3100 NE Sandy Blvd. Ten Million Lights, The Volt Per Octaves, (((boing)))

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Fez Fatale

dante’s

1332 W Burnside St. moe., Orgone

The Lovecraft

Tonic Lounge

Mt. Tabor Theater Lounge

Crystal ballroom

5474 NE Sandy Blvd. Randy Starr

eastburn

421 SE Grand Ave. Death Trip, DJ Tobias

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Laura Gibson, Nick Jaina, Daniel Hunt

2530 NE 82nd Ave. Race of Strangers, Monster Size Monsters, Wormbad, the Reigning Daze

Clyde’s Prime Rib

2026 NE Alberta St. Pierced Arrows, Ghostwriter, Freedom Club, DJ Ken Dirtnap

Kells

426 SW Washington St. Wizard Boots, The New Jangles, Brother Elf

Mississippi Studios

320 SE 2nd Ave. Sapient

3435 N Lombard St. Sean O’Neill

128 NE Russell St. Toro y Moi, Sinkane, Dog Bite

Kelly’s Olympian

backspace

Mock Crest Tavern

Jimmy Mak’s

112 SW 2nd Ave. Dave Ross

Shannon Tower Band, Little Hexes (9 pm); Jenny Sizzler (6 pm)

115 NW 5th Ave. Sama Dams, Walter Mitty and his Makeshift Orchestra, Tiananmen Bear, Amenta Abioto

836 N Russell St. The Defendants (8:30 pm); Brothers of the Hound (5:30 pm)

221 NW 10th Ave. The Mel Brown B3 Organ Group

Thrones, Megaton Leviathan, Lucifers Child, dj Brux Blackhawk

1800 E Burnside St. Cascadia Soul Alliance

Ford Food and drink

Hawthorne Theatre Lounge

Refuge

Rose Garden

1401 N Wheeler Ave. MercyMe, Jeremy Camp, Tedashil, Kutless, Family Force 5, Luminate, Adam Cappa, Rhett Walker Band, Tim Timmons

Shaker and Vine

2929 SE Powell Blvd. The TriTones

Slabtown

1033 NW 16th Ave. Broken Water, Older Women, Hugo Berlin

Someday Lounge

125 NW 5th Ave. Fun Yeti, LPS, Awkward Energy

Star bar

639 SE Morrison St. Blank Fridays

The blue Monk

3341 SE Belmont St. Jacob Merlin Band

1503 SE Cesar E. Chavez Ave. Black Snake, Ultra Goat, Ruff Hausen

The Crown Room

Hawthorne Theatre

The Know

Holocene

Tonic Lounge

Jimmy Mak’s

Tony Starlight’s

Katie O’briens

White eagle Saloon

3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Anberlin, Paper Route, All Get Out 1001 SE Morrison St. XXYYXX, Giraffage, CESTLADORE (9 pm); DJ Shinhwa (5 pm) 221 NW 10th Ave. Michael Kaeshammer 2809 NE Sandy Blvd. Start a War, Debrailler, the Karmaceuticals

Kells

112 SW 2nd Ave. Pass the Whiskey

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. A Happy Death, Child Children, Mysterious Creature

Kenton Club

2025 N Kilpatrick St. Rabbits, Acre, Tiny Knives

Korkage Wine bar & Shop

6351 SW Capitol Highway Anson Wright

Laughing Horse books

205 NW 4th Ave. Doc Adam, Dev From Above, Swerveone, DJTJ 2026 NE Alberta St. Birthday Suits, Youthbitch, Rat Party 3100 NE Sandy Blvd. Beyond Veronica, Wilkinson Blades, The Spiral Electric 3728 NE Sandy Blvd. The Tony Starlight Show 836 N Russell St. Paul Trubachik

Wonder ballroom

128 NE Russell St. Con Bro Chill, Wallpaper

SAT. MARCH 2 Al’s den at the Crystal Hotel 303 SW 12th Ave. A Simple Colony

Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. Hey Marseilles

Alberta Rose Theatre

3000 NE Alberta St. Live Wire Radio: Telekinesis, Joshua James

12 NE 10th Ave. Into the Open Earth, the Sky Above and Earth Below

Andina

LaurelThirst

225 SW Ash St. Solid Gold Balls, Ultra Sorta, The Small Arms

2958 NE Glisan St. Baby Gramps (9:30 pm); Tree Frogs (6 pm)

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave.

1314 NW Glisan St. Toshi Onizuka Trio

Ash Street Saloon

backspace

115 NW 5th Ave.

feb. 27–March 5 James RexRoad

1937 SE 11th Ave. A Happy Death, Talkative, Eidolons, A Volcano

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St. OBM IIIs, Guantanamo Baywatch, Boom!

Tonic Lounge

3100 NE Sandy Blvd. David J, Adrian H, Darwin

Tony Starlight’s

3728 NE Sandy Blvd. Tony Morrettii

Torta Landia

4144 SE 60th Ave. Zak’s Jazzy night

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Garcia Birthday Band

Wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St. The Reverend Horton Heat

BACK TO SCHOOL: Gnarly Grey (1235 SW Jefferson St., 971271-7407, gnarlygrey.com) might make you feel like you’ve gone back to college. Located a couple of blocks from the Portland State University campus, the bar on a recent Tuesday afternoon buzzed with student-aged patrons watching ESPN and working at laptops. Guys wore oversize hoodies and track pants; one girl’s white button-down barely skimmed past her black shorts. Owners Johnnie Ozimkowski and Cory Eckberg finished up at PSU last spring, and the bar is tailored to students’ tastes and budgets. The pool table is free, you can get mac and cheese for $4, and there’s Natural Light on draft along with Oakshire, Occidental and Burnside. With PSU and Timbers paraphernalia and a few James Dean portraits tacked to white walls, Gnarly Grey feels a bit like a dorm room. But, unless things have changed since my school days, few other dorm rooms offer a pancake shot (Crown Royal Maple and Smirnoff Iced Cake Vodka, $6.50) served with a strip of bacon. REBECCA JACOBSON. Eight Bells, the Body, Sedan, Usnea

Bamboo Grove Salon

134 SE Taylor St. Eugene Contemporary Chamber Ensemble, Estelí Gomez

Branx

320 SE 2nd Ave. Minnesota, Protohype, DCARLS

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave. Battleme, Bike Thief

Camellia Lounge 510 NW 11th Ave. Gordon Lee Trio

Club 21

2035 NE Glisan St. Needful Longings, The People Electric, Thee Four Teens

Clyde’s Prime Rib

5474 NE Sandy Blvd. Cool Breeze

Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St. Alabama Shakes, Michael Kiwanuka, Sam Doores and Riley Downing

Dante’s

350 W Burnside St. The View

Doug Fir Lounge 830 E Burnside St. Psychic Ills, Kinski, Follakzoid

Duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. Deke Dickerson, Two Man Gentleman Band

East End

203 SE Grand Ave. Debrailer, Beards of Yeast, Beringia

EastBurn

1800 E Burnside St. Conjugal Visitors

Fifteenth Avenue Hophouse 1517 NE Brazee St. Karyn Patridge

Foggy Notion

3416 N Lombard St. The Harvey Girls, I Like Science, Lunar Grave

Ford Food and Drink 2505 SE 11th Ave. Kathryn Claire

Goodfoot Lounge 2845 SE Stark St. Jackstraw, Foghorn String Band

Hawthorne Hophouse 4111 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Spodee-O’s

Hawthorne Theatre Lounge

1503 SE Cesar E. Chavez Ave. Still The Sky’s Limit, The Sindicate, The Longshots

Hawthorne Theatre

3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd. G-Eazy, Skizzy Mars

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave. All the Apparatus (9 pm); Kory Quinn (6 pm)

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Maserati, Hot Victory, Grapefruit

Mount Tabor Theater

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Device Grips, World’s Finest, Sexy Offenders (theater); Lost Weekend, Brakenmount (lounge)

Music Millennium

3158 E Burnside St. Hey Marseilles

Original Halibut’s II 2527 NE Alberta St. Jim Mesi

Red Room

SuN. MARCH 3 Al’s Den at the Crystal Hotel 303 SW 12th Ave. Joe McMurrian

Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. Dave’s Killer Granddaddies, Mary Flower, Kevin Selfe & the Tornadoes, the Robbie Laws Band, the Terry Robb Band, the (Fabulous) Knuckleheads

Andina

1314 NW Glisan St. Danny Romero, Ryan Walsh

Ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. Bloodoath, Ion Storm, Chronological Injustice, Rays Of Disillusion

Branx

320 SE 2nd Ave. Master, Sacrificial Slaughter, Fisthammer, Ceremonial Castings, Blood Truculence, Comulsive Slasher

Clyde’s Prime Rib

5474 NE Sandy Blvd. Ron Steen Jazz Jam

Crystal Ballroom

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Incredible Yacht Control, Fen Wik Ren

Kenton Club

2025 N Kilpatrick St. Brownish Black, Red Jacket Mine

LaurelThirst

2958 NE Glisan St. Pagan Jug Band (9:30 pm); James Low Western Front (6 pm)

Mission Theater

1624 NW Glisan St. Two Man Gentlemen Band, Maldon Meehan & Friends, Crow Quill Night Owls, Charleens, Brongaene Griffin & Friends

1033 NW 16th Ave. Countdown to Armageddon, Peroxide, Moral Hex

Slim’s Cocktail Bar

8635 N Lombard St. Trask River Redemption, Hearts of Oak, Power of Country

Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave. Noah Gunderson, Joshua James

TaborSpace

5441 SE Belmont St. Craig Bidondo, Tim Gilson (interactive show)

The Blue Monk

3341 SE Belmont St. The Ukeladies

1033 NW 16th Ave. Sad Horse, Voices

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Guyve, DJ Rockthrower

Torta Landia

4144 SE 60th Ave. Quizzy Trivia w/ Kerr

Valentine’s

232 SW Ankeny St. Gabriel Mintz, Low Hums

White Eagle Saloon

836 N Russell St. Conjugal Visitors, Closely Watched Trains

Wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St. Why?

MON. MARCH 4 Al’s Den at the Crystal Hotel 303 SW 12th Ave. Joe McMurrian

Andina

1314 NW Glisan St. Jason Okamoto

Ash Street Saloon 225 SW Ash St. Open Mic

Backspace

115 NW 5th Ave. Said The Whale, Morning Ritual

Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St. MarchFourth Marching Band

Dante’s

350 W Burnside St. Karaoke From Hell and Elvis

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Divers, Broncho, the Blank Tapes, Jaret Ferratusco 1635 SE 7th Ave. Lily Wilde Orchestra

East End

Jimmy Mak’s

203 SE Grand Ave. Mustaphamond, Mtns, Slow Screams

221 NW 10th Ave. The Dan Balmer Band

Ford Food and Drink 2505 SE 11th Ave. Tim Roth

210 NW 21st Ave. Traditional Irish Jam Session

Hawthorne Theatre

LaurelThirst

Holocene

Slabtown

2845 SE Stark St. Sonic Forum Open Mic Night

Shaker and Vine

112 SW 2nd Ave. Pass the Whiskey

600 E Burnside St. Animal Eyes, Talkative

Goodfoot Lounge

Katie O’Briens

Kells

Rontoms

830 E Burnside St. Darwin Deez, Caged Animals, Fanno Creek

8 NW 6th Ave. B.B. King

2929 SE Powell Blvd. Faerabella

8105 SE 7th Ave. Irish

Doug Fir Lounge

Jimmy Mak’s

2809 NE Sandy Blvd. Rvivr

Muddy Rudder Public House

1332 W Burnside St. MarchFourth Marching Band

3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd. The Ready Set, Outasight, Goldhouse, Master Shortie

Roseland Theater

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Chris Webby (theater); Micah Dalton (lounge)

Duff’s Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave. Tasp, Inanna, Blue Spectral Monkey

221 NW 10th Ave. Eddie Martinez

Mount Tabor Theater

1001 SE Morrison St. Boats, Houndstooth, Great Wilderness

LaurelThirst

2958 NE Glisan St. Dan Haley & Tim Acott, Freak Mountain Family, Ryan Stively, Kevin Large (Widower), Bill More

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave. The Saturday Morning Cartoons (9 pm); Lazy Champions (6 pm)

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Jukebox The Ghost, Matt Pond, The Lighthouse and The Whaler

Mount Hood Community College 26000 SE Stark St., Gresham Vagabond Opera

Kells Brewpub

2958 NE Glisan St. Happy Hour - Portland Country Underground; Kung Pao Chickens 3552 N Mississippi Ave. Mr. Ben

Mississippi Pizza

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Rhett Miller, Erin McKeown

MUSIC CALENDAR

Metal Mondays! - DJ Blackhawk

Twilight Café and Bar 1420 SE Powell Blvd. SIN Night

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Joliff

TuES. MARCH 5 Al’s Den at the Crystal Hotel 303 SW 12th Ave. Joe McMurrian

Andina

1314 NW Glisan St. JB Butler

Ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. PHREAK: ELECTRONIC MUTATIONS

Backspace

115 NW 5th Ave. Antique Scream, Machine, Sharks from Mars

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave. White Lung, Arctic Flowers

Camellia Lounge

510 NW 11th Ave. Steve Christofferson, Tom Wakeling, David Evans, Todd Strait

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Thao & the Get Down Stay Down

Duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. Dover Weinberg Quartet

Goodfoot Lounge

WED. FEB. 27 Berbati

231 SW Ankeny St. World Music Dance Party: DJ Jason Catalyst

Dig a Pony

736 SE Grand Ave. Pussy Control: Nathan Detroit, Freaky Outty

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St. DJ OverCol

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. Bill Portland

Valentine’s

232 SW Ankeny St. DJ ROB, Owen

THuRS. FEB. 28 Beech Street Parlor 412 NE Beech St. DJ Flip Forage

Berbati Restaurant 19 SW 2nd Ave. DJ Deaf Row

Dig a Pony

736 SE Grand Ave. Newrotics

East End

203 SE Grand Ave. Sweat It: Noah Sweat

Holocene

Jimmy Mak’s

1001 SE Morrison St. Laid Out: Gossip Cat, Pocket Rock-it, Misti Miller, Hold my Hand

LaurelThirst

2225 E Burnside St. DJ Eric Beats

2845 SE Stark St. The Roseland Hunters 221 NW 10th Ave. The Mel Brown Septet 2958 NE Glisan St. Happy Hour - Jackstraw

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Cotton Jones, Mission Spotlight

Pix Patisserie

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St. DJ Dirty Red

The Whiskey Bar

31 NW 1st Ave. Luminox, Gang$ign$, Cory O

Music Millennium

3158 E Burnside St. Daniel Bachman

Shaker and Vine

2929 SE Powell Blvd. Jim Prescott; Blake Lyman Quintet

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St. Batillus, Towers, Megaton Leviathan, DJ Nate C

Thorne Lounge

4260 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Tuesday Trivia!

Torta Landia

4144 SE 60th Ave. Wil Koehnke

Twilight Café and Bar 1420 SE Powell Blvd. Open Mic Night Featuring House Band: The Roaming

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Bottlecap Boys

FRI. MARCH 1 Beech Street Parlor 412 NE Beech St. Musique Plastique

Goodfoot Lounge 2845 SE Stark St. DJ Magneto

Lola’s Room at the Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St. ‘80s Video Dance Attack

Sassy’s

927 SE Morrison St. DJ Hazmatt

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Brickbat Mansion: DJs Curatrix and Wednesday

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. DJ Kevin Lee

SAT. MARCH 2 Beech Street Parlor 412 NE Beech St.

DJ Hero Worship

Gemini Lounge

6526 SE Foster Road Dance Mammoth Dance

Gold Dust Meridian

3267 SE Hawthorne Blvd. DJ Gregarious, DJ Disorder

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. Booty Bassment: Maxx Bass, Nathan Detroit, Ryan & Dimitri

Rotture

315 SE 3rd Ave. Andaz: DJ Anjali, the Incredible Kid

Someday Lounge

125 NW 5th Ave. J. Kruse, She’s Not Dead

Spare Room

4830 NE 42nd Ave. Sugar Town: DJs Action Slacks, Beyonda

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St. DJ Uriah Creep

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Miss Prid

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. Kendall Holladay

SuN. MARCH 3 Savoy Tavern & Lounge 2500 SE Clinton St. DJ Zac Eno

Someday Lounge 125 NW 5th Ave. Hive

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St. DJ Riff Randell, DJ Baby Lemonade

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. DJ Buddy Rockthrower

MON. MARCH 4 Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Eye Candy VJs

The Crown Room

205 NW 4th Ave. Dj King Fader, Nathaniel Knows, Sepkt1

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St. DJ Just Dave

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. Alex John Hall

TuES. MARCH 5 Beech Street Parlor 412 NE Beech St. DJ Reckless Jonny

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St. DJ Austin Johnson

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. Ministry of Information a n d R e w Pay n t e R

BAR SPOTLIGHT

The Firkin Tavern

Mount Tabor Theater

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Vic Ruggiero, Irie Idea

Muddy Rudder Public House 8105 SE 7th Ave. Lloyd Jones

Music Millennium

3158 E Burnside St. Erin Mckeown

O’Connor’s Vault

7850 SW Capitol Highway Gary Ogan with Dave Captein and Panhandler’s Union - Gary Ogan

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St.

CHILLWAVE SuRVIVOR: Toro y Moi plays Wonder Ballroom on Thursday, Feb. 28. Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

Feb. 27–March 5

= WW Pick. Highly recommended. Most prices listed are for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply, so it’s best to call ahead. Editor: REBECCA JACOBSON. Theater: REBECCA JACOBSON (rjacobson@ wweek.com). Classical: BRETT CAMPBELL (bcampbell@wweek.com). Dance: HEATHER WISNER (dance@wweek.com). TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit information at least two weeks in advance to: rjacobson@wweek.com.

THEATRE Antony and Cleopatra

Northwest Classical Theatre Company stages Shakespeare’s tragic romance. Shoe Box Theater, 2110 SE 10th Ave., 971-244-3740. 7:30 pm ThursdaysSaturdays, 2 pm Sundays through March 10. $18-$20.

Bill W. and Dr. Bob

[NEW REVIEW] You know those made-for-Mormon plays about Joseph Smith? His trials, tribulations and eventual triumph over the world? Well, this play is a lot like that, except it’s for die-hard 12-steppers. The two playwrights are psychologists whose previous plays include the opus We Have to Talk: Healing Dialogues Between Men and Women. Bill W. and Dr. Bob is pure propaganda for the healing powers of Alcoholics Anonymous (the group’s creepy, anachronistic religious content is downplayed for comic effect). No scene is without its thudding didactic purpose, and all dialogue is so distressingly on-the-nose that one would think the play’s a bloody-faced boxing match. By the end of its tedious 2 1/2 hours, it’s become less a play about alcoholism and healing than a horror story about the hell-on-earth of a life lived without a single unexpressed thought. Still, the play did have its own pathos. While I felt little for the cardboard characters—even Dr. Bob, charismatically played by Gary Powell—I did, finally, feel bad for the actors who had to play them. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. The CoHo Theater, 2257 NW Raleigh St., 715-1114. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays through March 30. $20-$25.

Blood Knot

Profile Theatre presents this 1961 play, an unblinking and impassioned look at apartheid in South Africa, that set the foundation for Athol Fugard’s career. Theater! Theatre!, 3430 SE Belmont St., 242-0080. 7:30 pm WednesdaysSaturdays, 2 pm Sundays through March 17. $16-$30.

Coming Soon to a Theater Near You

[NEW REVIEW] No Social Life Theatre Company, recently transplanted from Chicago, has set a goal of staging 12 shows in 12 months. In Coming Soon to a Theater Near You, the group’s first production, No Social Life’s Samuel Morris brings Portland a semiautobiographical play about Samuel Hardwick, a writer bringing his semiautobiographical screenplay to Hollywood. The nervously twitching Hardwick is spun into a web of L.A. caricatures who replace his touching screenplay with sex and explosions…and gay fairy hallucinations. Hardwick loses himself to a world where actors become writers become producers. Unfortunately, the audience may struggle to play along. With the ambiance of your kid sibling’s theatrical productions, Coming Soon plays out like a thinly veiled Inception in which struggling actors play struggling actors. When characters break the fourth wall to explain technical difficulties, it’s clear there is little suspension of disbelief to ruin. But Coming Soon is obviously a labor of love, and for that it gets a sticky gold star. ENID SPITZ. The No Social Life Theatre Company, 4038 N Mississippi Ave., 323-404-6274. 8 pm Fridays-Saturdays, 7 pm Sundays through March 10. $15.

The Great American Trailer Park Musical

[NEW REVIEW] A vibrant end to Stumptown Stages’ eighth season, The Great American Trailer Park Musical celebrates the high comedy of low culture amid Jerry Springer-rific hootenanny. The ostensible story, as introduced with a gimlet eye and rollicking invective by a tanning trio (picture Macbeth’s witches in hot pants and

hairspray), follows the crumbling marriage of an agoraphobe and a toll collector after an exotic dancer moves into Armadillo Acres. But that wafer-thin plot is little more than a clothesline on which to hang satirical song-and-dance numbers as brief and garish as the costumes. It’s all in awful taste, of course, and the show has attracted charges of snickering classism since its first off-Broadway production nine years ago. Still, since the days of Li’l Abner, there’s been a proud tradition of ennobling hillbilly caricatures through incandescent theatricality. The real offense, as with so many modern re-creations of the musical, lies with the music itself. While Kirk Mouser’s direction smartly keeps the momentum brisk without pause for spotlighted showstopping, the lyrics (cleverly bitchy and possessed of their own internal thrust) are thoroughly let down by the live band’s soft-rock balladry treacle and pop-by-numbers banality. If the characters of Pickles and Pippi had lyrics to match the performers’ élan, an enduring treasure might be found lurking in this revivified white trash. JAY HORTON. PCPA Brunish Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 946-7272. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays through March 10. $15-$30.

How Sweet Was My Swamp

Mask & Mirror Community Theatre presents a melodramatic family comedy set in the Louisiana swamps. Calvin Presbyterian Church, 10445 SW Canterbury Lane, Tigard, 691-1779. 7:30 pm Saturdays, 2 pm and 7:30 pm Sundays through March 17. $5-$12.

La Celestina

La Celestina, Raquel Carrió’s contemporary abbreviation of a 15th-century Spanish novel, tells the story of two wealthy youths who misplace their trust in their servants and in an old witch/pimp/matchmaker named Celestina. Strange as it may be, in the 21st century, to see the nobility praised as innocent and their serfs acting as petty conspirators, that is the thesis of both the original and the adaptation. Under director Christy Drogosch, the Miracle Theatre cast is led by Bibiana Lorenzo Johnston as a careworn Celestina, who interrupts her eerie stare with humorous interjections of “I am old.” Carlos Alexis Cruz reads lines from the original text and mocks the characters during his narrative interludes as a clownlike Trovador. Performed in Spanish with English supertitles, La Celestina provokes plenty of mild giggling, though darkly augural dream sequences run a little long. The production treats tragedy lightly, and its powerful themes—egotism, vanity and greed—remain in the background despite the Trovador’s attempts to highlight them. Perhaps his words at La Celestina’s close are enough. “I beg you to lament, my dear friends, their tragic end.” Lament, but keep laughing. MITCH LILLIE. Miracle Theatre, 525 SE Stark St., 236-7253. 7:30 pm Thursdays, 8 pm FridaysSaturdays, 2 pm Sundays through March 2. $15-$30.

Lost in Yonkers

The Portland Civic Theatre Guild presents a staged reading of Neil Simon’s Pulitzer-winning drama, a coming-ofage tale about two brothers. The Old Church, 1422 SW 11th Ave., 222-2031. 10 am Tuesday, March 5. $8.

Macbeth

Post Five Theatre inaugurates its new black-box space with a lusty version of Shakespeare’s bloodiest play, Macbeth. Ty Boice, Post Five’s artistic director, plays the murderous thane with a brooding masculinity and a wardrobe recalling Marlon Brando in Streetcar Named Desire. Far from “unsexed,” his Lady Macbeth (Cassandra Schwanke)

is a full-blown Shakespearean seductress in a black silk robe, and the action verges on voyeurism when the two meet. Fake blood galore, knife fights and combat boots further update the Scottish monarchy, but the cuts to Shakespeare’s text are unobtrusive and keep the spirit loyal. The cast, especially Nathan Dunkin as Banquo, captures Shakespeare’s dark world with intensity rather than melodrama. Actors weave through the audience to make their entrances into the small space, which lends the production a refreshing intimacy. (But watch your toes and elbows.) ENID SPITZ. Milepost 5, 850 NE 81st Ave., 971-2588584. 7 pm Fridays-Sundays through March 17. $10 Fridays-Saturdays, Sundays “pay what you can.”

Red Herring

The title of Red Herring is—surprise!— a red herring. The play’s murder is no mystery whatsoever after the first five minutes, and the only complicated procedural on display is in the vaudevillian slapstick of the dialogue. “Why are you drinking vodka with a spoon?” asks one character. “Because,” comes the Russian-inflected response, “when I drink with fork it spills on lap.” Herring is an enjoyably farcical romantic comedy disguised as a hard-boiled detective farce and, like a lot of young lovers, it’s fast, loose and a bit thin. The play wraps three star-crossed pairs—a lady detective and a G-man, a spy’s wife and an unwilling spy, Joe McCarthy’s daughter and a free-thinking physicist—into a paper-thin espionage plot that’s mostly an excuse to enact a 1940s-style fast-talkie full of whippet-quick banter and PG-rated sexual innuendo. This means the play is carried mostly by its winking wits and the hurtling speed of Christopher Liam Moore’s stage direction—truly, one of the most important characters in the play is a Murphy bed. While the entire cast performs its gymnastics admirably, the standout is Michael Mendelson as the sad Russian fisherman Andrei Borchevsky, who infuses his comedic role with genuine soulfulness. The wind does go out of the play’s sails in the final scene, but it still has more than enough momentum to drift across the finish line. Not to mention I laughed out loud more often than at any Portland production in recent memory. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Artists Repertory Theatre, 1515 SW Morrison St., 241-1278. 7:30 pm Wednesdays-Sundays, 2 pm Sundays through March 17. $25-$50.

Seussical

Northwest Children’s Theater cavorts through Dr. Seuss’ tales. NW Neighborhood Cultural Center, 1819 NW Everett St., 222-4480. Noon and 4 pm Saturdays-Sundays through March 3. $13-$22.

Shiver

Corrib Theatre, a new company dedicated to Irish theatre, presents a staged reading of Declan Hughes’ portrait of two couples just before the burst of the dot-com bubble. BodyVox Dance Center, 1201 NW 17th Ave., 229-0627. 8 pm Monday, March 4. Free, donation requested.

The Stinky Cheese Man and Other Fairly Stupid Tales

Oregon Children’s Theatre presents an adaptation of Jon Scieszka’s irreverent fairy tales. Winningstad Theatre, Portland Center for the Performing Arts, 1111 SW Broadway, 228-9571. 2 pm and 5 pm Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays through March 24. $15-$28.

The Velvet Sky

Bethany Palmer hasn’t slept in 13 years, not since her son Andrew was born. Fearing a ghoulish Sandman she believes is out to steal Andrew’s eyes, she stays up all night nervously knitting sweaters and tremulously singing lullabies. When her husband absconds with Andrew to New York City, Bethany follows in her plaid pajamas. As she frantically explains to a dopey bookstore owner before holding up his shop with a plastic gun, “I’m a patchwork woman, a crazy quilt.” The same could be said of Roberto AguirreSacasa’s nightmarish fairy tale of a play. There is much of this quilt to like:

the bursts of dark comedy, the unraveling moral landscape, the improbably adult wishes of young Andrew, the hallucinatory blurring of dream and reality. But Aguirre-Sacasa’s script is also frustratingly intent on spelling out its sensationalistic warnings from the beginning. On the bus to New York, Bethany (Karen Wennstrom) meets a ditzy woman (admirably underplayed by Beth Thompson) who delivers the ultimate fear-instilling message: “Kids are never safe,” she intones. The Velvet Sky goes on to bludgeon that message home. Still, director Jane Bement Geesman and her Theatre Vertigo cast and crew manage to treat this heavyhanded excursion with vigor. Eerie sound design and a canny set—triangular prisms that rotate to represent urinals at Port Authority, cinema marquees and deli windows—create a rich atmosphere as Andrew meets a

series of shady characters played by the excellent Andy Lee-Hillstrom. As Andrew, teenage actor Nathan Berl balances innocent inquisitiveness with growing anxiety. The nightclub scene is a highlight: It’s a madcap triptych, with Berl glow-sticking on one side, two actors grooving enthusiastically on the other and Wennstrom flailing in the middle. But just when it seems the play has dropped enough hints to conclude with appealing mystery, it jackknifes into lurid overexplanation. If this is what happens when the characters wake up and see the truth, I’d rather their hallucinations continue. REBECCA JACOBSON. Theater! Theatre!, 3430 SE Belmont St., 306-0870. 8 pm Thursdays-Saturdays through March 16. $15 Fridays-Saturdays, “pay what you want” Thursdays.

CONT. on page 32

REVIEW ROSEMARY RAGUSA

PERFORMANCE

take a look at me noW: spencer Conway and Christy Bigelow.

THREE DAYS OF RAIN (DEFUNKT THEATRE) The architect Ludwig Mies van der Rohe was famous for the aphorism “Less is more.” Though his design was guided by an abstract philosophy, his steel-and-glass buildings were outwardly simple and direct. There’s something of Mies’ maxim in Richard Greenberg’s Pulitzernominated Three Days of Rain, directed by Tom Moorman in an uneven Defunkt production. Its structure is elegant and its language hyperarticulate, but behind its clean exterior there’s a thorny emotional through-line. In the first act, set in Manhattan in 1995, impulsive Walker and his sister Nan reunite before the reading of their father’s will. Their father was a lauded architect—on a level with Mies, whose Farnsworth House gets name-dropped in the play—but cold and taciturn with his children. While squatting in his father’s old apartment, Walker has found his journal. It’s filled with infuriatingly opaque entries, and Walker lassoes the unwilling, uptight Nan into joining his investigation of the past. Matthew Kern plays Walker as a volatile and flamboyant egoist, in love with his own words and unconcerned for his sister (Christy Bigelow). Then enters Pip (a dynamic Spencer Conway), the charming son of their father’s long-dead partner, and tensions boil over as dangerous revelations come into focus. In act two, Greenberg jumps 35 years back in time, and we meet the previous generation. Walker and Nan’s father, Ned (Kern, affecting an unconvincing stammer), is a struggling architect while Pip’s father, Theo (Conway), is just as ebullient as his son. Bigelow plays boozy Southern belle Lina, tartly described in the first act as “Zelda Fitzgerald’s less stable sister,” who comes between the two men. The parallel structure offers a fascinating prism through which to examine the legacies and secrets parents hand down, as well as the misinterpretations their children contrive. But the second act stumbles, and Bigelow in particular. Lina should possess both pluck and desperation, but Bigelow lacks spark, and there’s no heat between her and Kern. Conway is largely absent in the second act, so rather than the love triangle coming to light, it just grows cold. After a vigorous first act, in which Moorman and his cast construct a sturdy and compelling edifice, the peek behind the façade proves unsatisfying. REBECCA JACOBSON.

Their father’s hell did slowly go by.

see it: Three Days of Rain is at the Back Door Theater, 4319 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 481-2960. 8 pm Thursdays-Sundays through March 23. $15-$25 Fridays and Saturdays, “pay what you can” Thursdays and Sundays. Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

PERFORMANCE

Feb. 27–March 5

GARY NORMAN

caustic of comedians is finally feeling... satisfied? Based on his last comedy album, 2011’s This Has to Be Funny, not entirely. Lucky us. MATTHEW SINGER. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave., 234-9694. 7 pm Thursday, Feb. 28. $25. Under 21 admitted with guardian.

Park Ave., 725-3307. 7:30 pm Tuesday, March 5. $15-$25.

Joe Powers and Hideki Yamaya

The oddball combo of tango harmonica master and Baroque lutenist-guitarist doesn’t seem quite so unlikely considering Powers’ diverse output and collaborations with everyone from Pink Martini to the Oregon Bach Festival to a Japanese orchestra and Yamaya’s performances all over the world. They’ll play polkas, Gypsy dances, French Impressionist tunes, tango and more. Walters Cultural Arts Center, 527 E Main St., Hillsboro. 7:30 pm Friday, March 1. $15-$20.

Rex Navarrete

Billing himself as the premier FilipinoAmerican comic, Navarrete works on the animated show The Nutshack. Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave., 888-643-8669. 8 pm WednesdayThursday, Feb. 27-28. $15-$20.

Spectravagasm 2

Venus in Fur

Fifty Shades of Grey reduced sadomasochism to handcuffs and spanking. Venus in Fur—while not devoid of dog collars and riding crops—throws into question such simple ideas of control and compliance. In David Ives’ work, in a jagged but entertaining Portland Center Stage production directed by Nancy Keystone, the relationship between domination and submission is an erotic power play that revels in its ambiguous stakes. Thomas (David Barlow) is a playwright-director who has adapted Leopold von Sacher-Masoch’s 1870 novella about a man who dreams of being enslaved by a woman, and as Venus in Fur begins he’s just endured a disastrous string of auditions. But as he calls his fiancee to snivel about those 35 inept actresses, into the dingy rehearsal room blows Vanda (Ginny Myers Lee), swearing about the perverts on the subway. Vanda may have come dressed in spike heels and leather bustier (which she’ll later unzip with a very funny “Geronimo!”), but on first glance she’s not so different from the 35 previous ninnies. That quickly changes, though, as she cajoles Thomas into letting her audition. Lee, with impressive control, transitions between more than two roles: In addition to modern-day Vanda, a ditzy motor mouth, and 19thcentury Vanda, a haughty aristocrat, there’s another Vanda who cites Greek mythology and dips into startling psychosexual insights. Lee flings herself into these rapidly shifting guises, and she’s hilarious to boot—in the show’s comedic highlight, Vanda improvises a scene as a German-accented Venus, whispering “I’ll be back” as if she’s Schwarzenegger. Opposite this swirling tempest, Barlow falters. As his character is alternately flattered and berated, Barlow’s default response is to widen his eyes and gape at Vanda like a startled puppy. Best, perhaps, to turn attention to Ives’ sizzling script, a fiercer whip than E.L. James could ever hope to crack. REBECCA JACOBSON. Gerding Theater, 128 NW 11th Ave., 445-3700. 7:30 pm Tuesdays-Saturdays and most Sundays, 2 pm Saturdays-Sundays, noon Thursdays through March 10. $25-$54.

War Horse

The epic production, about the friendship between a boy and his horse, gallops to Portland. Keller Auditorium, 222 SW Clay St., 800-745-3000. 7:30 pm Tuesday-Saturday, 2 pm Saturday, 1 pm and 6:30 pm Sunday, Feb. 26-March 3. $25-$95.

Weekend at Bernie’s

Another cinematic cult classic adapted for the stage: In this 1989 screwball comedy, two loser businessmen discover their boss has been murdered, and they pretend he’s still alive. Funhouse Lounge, 2432 SE 11th Ave. 8 pm Thursdays-Sundays through March 3. 10 pm Saturday, March 2. $15-$18.

The Whipping Man

Matthew Lopez’s 2011 drama, about a Jewish Confederate soldier and two former slaves, shot the young playwright into the spotlight. Portland Center Stage presents the Civil

War-era tale. Gerding Theater, 128 NW 11th Ave., 445-3700. 7:30 pm TuesdaysSundays, 2 pm Saturdays-Sundays, noon Thursdays through March 23. $39-$65.

COMEDY & VARIETY Cinema Curiouso

Movie-themed sketch comedy. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 8 pm FridaysSaturdays through March 9. $12-$15.

Dov Davidoff

Known for his frenetic brand of comedy, Davidoff has made the latenight talk-show circuit and hosted his own Comedy Central special. Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave., 888643-8669. 7:30 pm and 10 pm FridaySaturday, March 1-2. $20-$25.

Sometimes the title speaks for itself. This cabaret-comedy performance features roller-derby girls, parasitic aliens and puppets as it pays homage to ’80s-era movies. Jack London Bar, 529 SW 4th Ave., 503-228-7605. 7:30 pm and 9:30 pm Thursday, Feb. 28. $5. 21+.

CLASSICAL

Lezberados

Belinda Carroll hosts Sandra Valls and Mimi Gonzalez, two Latina lesbians making a name for themselves on the national comedy circuit. Bob White Theatre, 6423 SE Foster Road, 3201242. 8 pm Friday, March 1. $15-$20.

Marc Maron

Marc Maron is twice divorced, a recovering addict, a three-time failure as a liberal radio pundit and a veteran comic who, over the past 20-plus years, has watched many of his peers rise to household-name status while he’s remained mired in obscurity. He’s not complaining, though. Not as much as he used to, at least. And with good reason: His podcast, WTF (it stands for what you think it does), has become a standard-bearer for the medium. Ostensibly an interview show featuring Maron’s comedy-world colleagues—though he’s now welcomed everyone from Bryan Cranston to Fiona Apple—it often morphs into a public therapy session through the host’s uncanny ability to pry astonishing candor out of his guests. Once described as the neurosis of Woody Allen communicated with the fury of Iggy Pop, his stand-up is marked by almost uncomfortable levels of unvarnished honesty. Thanks largely to WTF, more people are now coming out to see him live. Could it be that this most

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

Portland Cello Project, Fear No Music With Baritone Kevin Walsh, Pacific Youth Choir, Laura Gibson, Quadraphonnes, Michael Kleinschmidt, Samiya Bashir

Liz Bacon and Jon Stuber

Dan Tepfer and Ben Wendel

To raise funds to bring international guests and to purchase new tech equipment, the Brody Theater hosts 26 hours of nonstop improv. Bring your Gu and Bengay. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 224-2227. 7:30 pm Friday, March 1. $10-$12, or come-and-go pass for $16-$18.

The Russians are coming—overtures by Shostakovich and Tchaikovsky, Kozhevnikov’s Symphony No. 3—and MYS concerto competition winner Caitlin Huang joins the orchestra to play the stirring last movement of Beethoven’s Piano Concerto No. 3. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 239-4566. 8 pm Sunday, March 3. $14-$37.

The geek icon joins forces with the music-comedy duo for an evening of jokes, songs and stories (probably about pirates). Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St., 719-6055. 8 pm Wednesday, Feb. 27. $20. 18+.

Fool’s Gold: A Comedy Variety Show

Improvathon

Metropolitan Youth Symphony

Wil Wheaton vs. Paul and Storm

A comedy game show, with panelists and audience members competing for prizes. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 8 pm every fourth Thursday through March 28. $5.

Comedy returns to Suki’s, with local funny people performing stand-up and short-form improv. Suki’s Bar &Grill, 2401 SW 4th Ave., 226-1181. 8 pm Sunday, March 3. Free.

One of today’s most acclaimed virtuosos plays 20th-century works by a wide range of composers, including Ravel’s ferociously difficult—to play, if not to enjoy—masterpiece, “Gaspard of the Night,” three works by Rachmaninoff, two by Gabriel Fauré, a sonata by early atonalist Alban Berg and a set of variations by Boston resident Hamelin himself. Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 228-1388. 4 pm Sunday, March 3. $14-$61.

Varsity Cheerleader Werewolves From Outer Space

Vancouver Symphony violinist Chris Fotinakis, Portland Opera singer Erik Hundtoft and members of that fine classical-to-contemporary crossover female quartet, the Julians, join pianist Stuber and singer Bacon in 1940s and ‘50s jazz standards from the mythical Great American Songbook. Tony Starlight’s, 3728 NE Sandy Blvd., 5178584. 7:30 pm Thursday, Feb. 28. $10.

Fill in the Blank

Marc-Andre Hamelin

Directed by organist Kleinschmidt and with an installation by singer-impresario Stephen Marc Beaudoin, Be Gone, Dull Care, Trinity Music’s annual cure for the winter blahs, inventively uses the cathedral space. There will be poetry and other readings, a wide range of music (classical, gospel, jazz, folk—including works by the great 20th-century American composers Samuel Barber, Philip Glass, Seattle-born William Bolcom, Charles Ives), movement and more. It benefits worthy causes: Our House of Portland and the Trinity Meals Program for Homeless and Needy Persons. Trinity Episcopal Cathedral, 147 NW 19th Ave. 5 pm Sunday, March 3. $15 suggested donation.

Nationally acclaimed, young jazz pianist Tepfer was born in Paris, studied at New England Conservatory and lives in New York City. But he considers Eugene, where his grandfather was a popular jazz pianist, where his parents grew up and where he spent childhood summers, his second home. If that’s what it takes to get him to Oregon with reed player Ben Wendel, then we’re the lucky ones, because the two classically trained musicians’ striking, melodic originals fully imbibe jazz’s improvisatory originality. But their music also draws on influences from French composer Olivier Messiaen, Handel and J.S. Bach, as well as jazz legends like Lennie Tristano, Miles Davis and Lee Konitz, with whom Tepfer made an excellent duets album. Ivories Jazz Lounge and Restaurant, 1435 NW Flanders St., 241-6514. 5:30 pm Sunday, March 3. $15.

Portland Youth Philharmonic

The nation’s oldest youth orchestra revives a work it commissioned more than half a century ago: American composer William Bergsma’s brassy, exuberant Chameleon Variations. There will be two other classics, Mendelssohn’s popular second Violin Concerto and Tchaikovsky’s sixth and final symphony, the one that ends on a surprising note of bummer-dom rather than triumph. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 223-5939. 7:30 pm Saturday, March 2. $11-$52.50.

Eugene Contemporary Chamber Ensemble, Esteli Gomez

The University of Oregon student composers group features premieres of its own works inspired by natural soundscapes—including one commissioned by Crater Lake National Park that incorporates field recordings made there—sung by prizewinning, young Californian-born soprano Gomez. Plus there will be video documentaries and contemporary compositions by the great Alaska composer John Luther Adams, prominent French composer Tristan Murail and Seattle’s Emily Doolittle. Bamboo Grove Salon, 134 SE Taylor St., 236-0386. 8 pm Saturday, March 2. $8-$10.

Florestan Trio

The PSU-based piano-cello-violin threesome celebrates its 36th season by reprising two works (by Beethoven and Mendelssohn) from its first year, along with a searing 20th-century masterpiece: Dmitri Shostakovich’s second piano trio. Lincoln Hall, Portland State University, 1620 SW

Third Angle

Two years ago, the venerable newmusic ensemble brought to town one of America’s finest composers, Bang on a Can co-founder David Lang, for a concert of his pulsating music. Now come the other two members of the New York collective’s founding triumvirate, Michael Gordon and Julia Wolfe, the composer/married couple whose music also embraces rock (check the many ‘60s rock-band references in Gordon’s song titles) and minimalist influences, but in different ways. Written in the wake of the September 11 attacks, Gordon’s poignant Light is Calling for violin and electronics will be accompanied by a haunting film by avant-garde filmmaker (and former Reedie) Bill Morrison, who, like Gordon, lived near Ground Zero. Ac dc deploys odd rhythms over a bass grove, The Low Quartet showcases woodwinds, while Industry warps and bludgeons the cello’s sound like the distorted old film images in Morrison’s films. The buzzsaw basses and surging recorded bagpipes in Wolfe’s Stronghold and Lad, respectively, display her infatuation with sonic texture. Together, the pair’s music shows how popular-music influences are giving contemporary classical music a much needed infusion of vitality. Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St., 764-4131. 7:30 pm Thursday-Friday, Feb. 28-March 1. $10-$35.

DANCE Momix

Imaginative, colorful, athletic and visually pleasing, the 90-minute Momix production Botanica offers a kaleidoscopic vision of nature, unfolding to a score encompassing everything from birdsong to electronica. Aided by creative costuming and Portland artist Michael Curry’s puppetry, the company’s 10 dancers become birds, beasts and blooming branches. Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 248-4335. 7:30 pm Wednesday-Friday, Feb. 27-March 1; 2 pm and 7:30 pm Saturday, March 2. $26-$64.

For more Performance listings, visit

JOKE IN A BOX

GABE DINGER ERIKA PLUMMER

macbeth

Post Five Theatre presents Portlandspecific sketch comedy with a futuristic spin. Milepost 5, 850 NE 81st Ave., 971-258-8584. 10:30 pm FridaysSaturdays through March 16. “Pay what you can,” $10 suggested.

Resonance Ensemble

One of the Northwest’s finest choral aggregations, abetted by piano, organ and percussion, breaks the code of silence with music from the Soviet era. The era’s value was obscured either by its forced subservience to propaganda purposes (including powerful works by Prokofiev and Shostakovich), or by its originally hidden, coded antiSoviet messages, including fiercely defiant works by the great 20thcentury Eastern European composers György Ligeti, Veljo Tormis and Arvo Pärt. Saturday’s performance is at the Agnes Flanagan Chapel at Lewis&Clark College (615 SW Palatine Hill Road). YU Contemporary, 800 SE 10th Ave., Portland, 236-7996. 7:30 pm Saturday and 2 pm Sunday, March 2-3. $11-$22.

Please describe my mama: “Your mama is so stupid she told you that you could be whatever you wanted to be when you grew up. So, you never put any real effort into high school. Not putting any thought into what you wanted to do with your life, you went to college. She told you to follow your heart, so you got a B.S. in sociology. But you couldn’t find a job you were “worthy” of, so she now has her unemployed, single, Pabst-swigging, ironic movie-watching, beard-sporting, bike-riding, mandolin-playing, zombie-fearing, debt-collecting, piece-of-shit kid living with her. She is also fat.” GO: Gabe Dinger is at Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 8 pm Sunday, March 3.

VISUAL ARTS

FEB. 27–MARCH 5

= WW Pick. Highly recommended. By RICHARD SPEER. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit show information—including opening and closing dates, gallery address and phone number—at least two weeks in advance to: Visual Arts, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: rspeer@wweek.com.

Kayla Newell

A rising star in Portland’s art constellation, Kayla Newell mounts a strong showing of mixed-media drawing/painting hybrids at Mark Woolley’s gallery at Pioneer Place Mall. In fantastical mountainscapes such as Stone Pile and Ascend, she uses paint drips to suggest waterfalls and majestic, Middle Earth-like vistas. Her work has a similar feel to that of fellow Portland artists Adam Sorensen and Anna Fidler, but with the addition of meticulously rendered geometric motifs, glitter and sludgy black paint covering up intricate structures beneath. Through March 10. Mark Woolley Gallery @ Pioneer, 700 SW 5th Ave., third ﬂoor, Pioneer Place Mall, 998-4152.

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Pedro Farias-Nordi

With tenderness and empathy, Dominican photographer Pedro Farias-Nardi documents the faces and lives of Haitian migrant workers in the Dominican Republic. His black-and-white Cold Trade series photojournalistically chronicles workers as they hoist and heave ginormous blocks of ice. Another body of work, El Otro, shows workers’ faces in shallow-focus close-up. These latter glow with soft luminescence and powerful saturation. Each face tells a story through crags and scars, wrinkles and blemishes. Through March 3. Blue Sky Gallery, 122 NW 8th Ave., 225-0210.

Portland as Fuck

Aqua: Michael Kessler

Santa Fe-based painter Michael Kessler triumphs with a suite of virtuosic works in Butters Gallery’s group show, Aqua. He moves away from the drab desert tones that dominated his last solo show at Butters in favor of inspired combinations of vibrant blues and mint greens, which alternately pique and soothe the eye. Kessler’s work has always been about juxtaposition, mixing organic and geometric motifs, but for this outing he advances that strategy by using framing devices. The painting Galvanic, which surrounds an invigorating blue and green mash-up with creamy ecru, is one of his most challenging and fulﬁlling pieces in years. Through March 2. Butters Gallery, 520 NW Davis St., second ﬂoor, 2489378.

Arnold J. Kemp: When Will My Love Be Right

Loosely themed around the Valentine’s Day-appropriate theme of romantic love, Arnold J. Kemp’s aluminum-foil masks exude insouciant charm. Digitally scanned and printed, the works in his What Actually Happens series are individually framed in painted colors related to the chromatic and thematic personalities of each print. Additionally, he has handcrafted sartorial objects (belts and shoes) as knowing nods to the individuality of romantic and erotic personae. Isn’t there a tragicomic arbitrariness to these accessories, not too far removed from the randomness of whom we wind up with in love and life? Through March 2. PDX Contemporary Art, 925 NW Flanders St., 222-0063.

Danny Lyon: The Bikeriders

Is it possible for a piece of paper with a black-and-white image to distill the essence of an era? That’s what photographer Danny Lyon is betting on with The Bikeriders, a distillation of the motorcycle-gang subculture of the 1960s. These images are chock-full of bikes and beer guts, tattoos and wifebeaters, greasy-spoon diners and yards upon yards of leather. In short, this is exactly what you’d expect from a

photographic essay of this time and milieu. Through March 16. Charles A. Hartman Fine Art, 134 NW 8th Ave., 287-3886.

Gary Boswell

Gary Boswell’s collages and drawings are all over the place, but his Automatic Painting series might be the best artwork up in Portland this month. In suave tones of black, white and gray, he allows the materials in his tempera monoprints to seep, weep and slide around the picture plane. The resulting forms resemble stalactites, tendriled plants and ultrasound imagery. Glamorous and vaguely sinister, they exude conﬁdence and polish. Through March 3. Nine Gallery, 122 NW 8th Ave., 227-7114.

Henk Pander: The Tooth of Time

Henk Pander is a venerated Northwest painter; he’s been around a long time and has work in some important collections. Unfortunately, he’s just not very good. The hokey burning ship in The Sea and the Rush album cover-worthy futurist dystopia titled Iron Fist (listed for sale at a whopping $70,000 apiece) are notable for their agreeably creamy impasto and their disagreeably cartoonish rendering. Pander does not possess the technique necessary for high realism, so he relies on the crutch of allegory. Through March 2. Laura Russo Gallery, 805 NW 21st Ave., 226-2754.

Judy Cooke: Subtext

Judy Cooke goes for and achieves “amateur chic” in her oil, pencil and wax works on wood panel. Her sloppy grids and awkward forms display a cloying self-awareness of the sort that emerges dually from untrained street artists and Master of Fine Arts degree holders. The best piece in the show is Corner, a suavely gorgeous birch panel adorned with diagonal and vertical lines that recall constructivist masters. It should also be noted that any good-quality birch panel without anything on it at all, is quite handsome in its own right. Through March 2. Elizabeth Leach Gallery, 417 NW 9th Ave., 224-0521.

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MOMIX

The Monument of the 7th Dimension

The Faux Museum may well be the next 24-hour Church of Elvis. Its current exhibit, The Monument of the 7th Dimension, has a similarly oﬀ-kilter, DIY vibe. Conceived as a portal to another dimension, the walk-through installation is laid out like a cardboard haunted house. Viewers walk a corridor, through tin-foil curtains and a papier-mâché cave, past sound-activated hanging bamboo stems and an electric organ that has a conspicuous depiction of a beaver on top. An audio track blends the squawking of gulls with a recording of late President Ronald Reagan’s infamous outtake about bombing the Soviet Union. An agreeably crazed, lowbrow aesthetic pervades. Through March 31. The Faux Museum, 139 NW 2nd Ave.

th 15ANNIVERSARY

BOTANICA

A bouquet of dance, athleticism, and fantasy.” The New York Times

Vanitas

Michael Endo has long held an interest in the “vanitas” genre of 17thcentury still-life painting, which used motifs such as skulls and botanicals as memento mori. As an artist, Endo has explored these motifs in his paintings. Now, as a curator at Bullseye Gallery, he calls upon five other artists to offer takes on the transience of human life: Shannon Brunskill, June Kingsbury, Catharine Newell, Marc Petrovic and Michael Rogers. All five use glass as a material. It’s an intriguing medium for this theme. Through March 2. Bullseye Gallery, 300 NW 13th Ave., 227-0222.

For more Visual Arts listings, visit

Photos by Max Pucciariello

WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENS (SEE BLACK SAY RED) BY ARNOLD J. KEMP

How can you not like a show called Portland as Fuck? This group exhibition is loosely themed around the reasons we love our fair city of stumps. Fortunately, the artists didn’t take the assignment too literally; this is no Portlandia retread, but rather an essence-isolating distillation of sometimes oblique references. Among the highlights are Ryan Bubnis’ abstracted mountains and rivers; Brett Superstar’s witty wool wall sculpture of Paul Bunyan; and Timothy Karpinski’s multicolored laurel wreath. And then there is Tripper Dungan’s depiction of a beer-swilling monkey on roller skates. Viewers will scratch their heads, say “What the...?” and then smile when the light bulb turns on. Who is that beer-swilling monkey? He is not in our stars, dear Brutus, but in ourselves. Through March 3. Compound Gallery, 107 NW 5th Ave., 796-2733.

Hotel, Restaurant & Event Management program includes:

TONIGHT SATURDAY

SPONSORED BY

Newmark Theatre, 7:30pm PLUS Family Matinee 2pm Sat Tickets: www.whitebird.org Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

BOOKS

FEB. 27–MARCH 5

= WW Pick. Highly recommended. By PENELOPE BASS. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit lecture or reading information at least two weeks in advance to: WORDS, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: words@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

WEDNESDAY, FEB. 27 OMSI After Dark: MythBusters

In conjunction with the new MythBusters exhibit, OMSI After Dark will be experimenting on its patrons with several challenges and demonstrations. Eat six Saltine crackers within one minute, walk a straight line blindfolded and learn whether your face full of piercings leaves you more likely to be struck by lightning. Because science is more fun when it’s dangerous. OMSI, 1945 SE Water Ave., 797-4000. 6 pm. $6-$12. 21+.

Virginia Morell

Ever wondered what Fido is thinking while eating his own vomit? Science writer Virginia Morell follows the work of animal cognition researchers studying the memories, personalities and feelings of animals and the ethical dilemmas raised in testing in her newest book, Animal Wise: The Thoughts and Emotions of Our Fellow Creatures. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 2284651. 7:30 pm. Free.

James Asmus

Writer, performer and theater playwright James Asmus will be signing copies of Gambit (Marvel) as well as his new series, The End Times of Bram & Ben, for Image Comics. Bring a pen and your explosive playing cards. Things From Another World , 2916 NE Broadway St. 7 pm. Free.

SUNDAY, MARCH 3 Jess Walter

Releasing his ﬁrst collection of short ﬁction, Jess Walter weaves together wit and spirit with diverse stories following personal struggle and disappointment with We Live in Water. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 228-4651. 7:30 pm. Free.

Willamette Week’s

MONDAY, MARCH 4 Thank you to everyone who participated in Cartathlon III!

WINNING TEAMS BEST COSTUME

BEST TEAM NAME

OVERALL SCORE

The Cartigans

OMSI Science Pub

Sure, it might be present in nearly everything we consume, but do we really know what high-fructose corn syrup actually is? Dr. Daniel L. Marks will talk about the biology of sugar consumption, touching on everything from the development of human diseases to the politics behind corn processing. Grab a 32-ounce soda and take a seat. Bagdad Theater, 3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 236-9234. 7 pm. $5.

Story Time for Grown-ups

The Last Supper

Shut Your Cart Hole

A BIG thank you to all the food carts! CARTS INCLUDE: BIG-ASS SANDWICHES FLAVOURSPOT • GRILLED CHEESE GRILL KOI FUSION • POTATO CHAMPION WHIFFIES FRIED PIES • BURGATROYD GONZO • PYRO PIZZA • NIKKI & LEFTY’S

Celebrating the eighth anniversary of the ﬁrst Story Time for Grownups, local actor and founder of the event David Loftus will read from his mother’s own memoir about her Japanese father. Made in Japan and Settled in Oregon follows Mitzi Asai’s time in the Japanese internment camps with her family during WWII and their relocation to Hood River after the war. Grendel’s Coﬀee House, 729 E Burnside St., 595-9550. 7:30 pm. Free. All ages.

Authors in Pubs

SEE YOU NEXT YEAR! 34

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

The first Monday reading and drinking event is back with a solid lineup of a dozen local and visiting authors, including this month’s featured writer, Chicago poet Danny McKeever. Dale Plog will also offer a roast of event founder Don Van Kirk, guest artist Shelley Loring will show her work and the official Authors in Pubs band, the Consort Symbiotic, will perform. Jack London Bar, 529 SW 4th Ave., 503-228-7605. 7 pm. Free. 21+.

Oregon Encyclopedia History Night

Ever wandered the neighborhoods of Portland, admiring the variety of homes and wondered, “What the hell is that?” While many similar architectural themes are seen throughout the city, many homes defy classiﬁcation. Oregon Encyclopedia has partnered with the Architectural Heritage Center for the presentation “Houses Without Names: The Common, Everyday Houses of Portland’s Neighborhoods.” Mission Theater, 1624 NW Glisan St., 223-4527. 7 pm. Free.

TUESDAY, MARCH 5 The Mad Scientist’s Guide to World Domination

From super-villains to the simply misunderstood, the bad guys—like Lex Luthor and doctors Moreau and Doom—have long gotten a bad rep. The Mad Scientist’s Guide to World Domination examines famous villains from their own point of view to oﬀer a little more understanding and maybe even a little sympathy. Editor John Joseph Adams will discuss the book with contributors David Levine and Daniel Wilson. Powell’s Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, 3415 SW Cedar Hills Blvd., Beaverton, 228-4651. 7 pm. Free.

For more Books listings, visit

REVIEW

KINFOLK For all the tears shed over the withering magazine industry, certain niche periodicals have actually thrived. Design-oriented mags require the printed page for best effect, foodies aren’t yet comfortable placing laptop beside mixing bowl, and glossies slavishly documenting aristocratic spoils don’t really make sense unless casually Better Homes and strewn about the armoire. So Grey Gardens. long as there’s old money, there will always be old media, though newer iterations take rather a different approach toward preserving the hoariest traditions. The sixth edition of Portland-based quarterly Kinfolk presents itself as “a guide for small gatherings,” without bothering to include anything so dully practical as advice. Fondly remembered recipes are offered but not quite recommended, and undercut by the ever-present paeans to spontaneity. A piece concerning the irritation of mismatched ancestral silver serves largely to comfort similarly bedeviled readers. Reminiscences achieve a solipsistic grandeur—“As a child, I spent a lot of time with older relatives,” one essay helpfully begins—that best resembles a psychoanalyst’s notes workshopped to bloodless anonymity. Written by, for and about twentysomethings who need only the gentle reminder to luxuriate within their good fortune, articles bereft of information would seemingly hold little value for anyone striving to approximate the heights of patrician grace. But, then, we’re not so sure Kinfolk was meant to be read. Typos are scattered about shrunken packets of prose quite literally marginalized beyond irrelevance. The fine print primarily showcases the sumptuous white space abounding outside showily edged borders: a quantity of white space inversely proportional to the number of photographs depicting people of color. Should the clumped type be intended as only a vestigial nod to the early days of periodicals, the resulting design couldn’t be lovelier. Richly textured portraiture and playful illustrations fill matte pages as thick and lustrous as their exaggerated cover price affords. At $18, Kinfolk might equal the weekly food budget of our local creative class, but the magazine, which came to life in Salt Lake City, isn’t really meant for Portlanders. The putative hometown receives scant mention, and a far-flung distribution shepherded by enviable placement within Anthropologie and Williams-Sonoma outlets probably explains its continuing existence. Kinfolk embodies the furthest flowering of the lifestyle publication: a bottomless reserve of uncomplicated reassurance that promises the aging children of privilege that intimate entertaining will require nothing more than benevolent intent. That’s no more true for parties than for magazines. JAY HORTON. READ: Kinfolk is available at Anthropologie, West Elm, Spartan at Beam & Anchor, Oui Presse and the Woodsman Market. kinfolkmag.com.

feb. 27–maRch 5 FEATURE

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

L I O N S G AT E / C B S F I L M S

MOVIES

Editor: REBECCA JACOBSON. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, send screening information at least two weeks in advance to Screen, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: rjacobson@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

21 and Over

From Jon Lucas and Scott Moore, writers of The Hangover, comes another gross-out comedy, this one about a straight-A student who has a wild 21st birthday the night before a big medical school interview. Not screened for critics. R. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Lloyd Center, Oak Grove, City Center, Division, Evergreen Parkway, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Tigard, Sandy.

56 Up

A This documentary is “a complete

fraud,” says one of its subjects. It’s a sentiment voiced often in 56 Up, the latest in Michael Apted’s visionary, often-depressing series that has documented the lives of 14 disparate Britons, in seven-year installments, since they were 7 years old in 1964. John, the above-quoted skeptic, resists the notion that social class determines one’s future: He is, of course, congenitally upper-crust rich and has remained so. The lower-class men and women—who have also remained so, though most have grown more comfortable over the years—have a different perspective. For those who’ve not watched all the previous installments, 56 Up is largely of anthropological or cultural interest; for those who have, there’s a wistful sadness to the affair. Each life is accorded only 10 minutes and seems somehow diminished by the attention. Still, it’s one of the great journeys in documentary film; it’s unlikely there will be another one like it. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Living Room Theaters.

Alien Boy: The Life and Death of James Chasse

A Heartbreaking and incendiary in equal measures, Portland filmmaker Brian Lindstrom’s documentary plays out like a horror film and leaves you absolutely breathless. The story is one familiar to most Portlanders: In 2006, James Chasse, crippled by schizophrenia but by all accounts harmless, was beaten by Portland police, died in custody and was the subject of a massive cover-up that portrayed him as a monster. Lindstrom’s film pieces together eyewitness accounts and courtroom footage to forge an amazing piece of documentary journalism that’s equally focused on the procedural account of Chasse’s death and the people whose lives it affected. Everybody except the officers whose fists sealed Chasse’s fate offer their remembrances, though officers Kyle Nice, Bret Barton and Christopher Humphreys do appear in archival footage of their trial (each refused to be interviewed). But what really hammers Alien Boy home is not how he died but how he lived. After Chasse was slain, police falsely labeled him a transient junkie. Lindstrom’s film dives deeply into the life of a man who touched countless lives through the pioneering position he held in Portland’s early punk-rock scene. Ex-girlfriends, family members, musicians, artists and parishioners from his church all tell of a deeply troubled but caring man whose mental despair robbed him of peace. This human setup makes Alien Boy’s outcome all the more difficult, and Humphreys’ smug apathy and on-record lies all the more infuriating. Chasse was starting to slip through the cracks, but before he fell, his life was extinguished by those charged with protecting him. Lindstrom does a tremendous job showing what we lost as Chasse lay dying on a Pearl District sidewalk: not just a life, but our confidence in those sworn to serve and protect. AP KRYZA. Cinema 21.

Amour

Midway through Michael Haneke’s scrupulously devastating Amour, the elderly Georges (Jean-Louis Trintignant) tells his wife, Anne (Emmanuelle Riva), about a film

he remembers watching as a child. Though he can no longer recall any details, he keenly remembers how the film made him feel, and the reminiscence brings him to tears. “The emotions remain,” he tells Anne. That scene is almost too perfect—it is, undoubtedly, Haneke’s nod to the enduring power of cinema—but it captures what makes Amour both calmly beautiful and tremendously wrenching. Over the film’s course, Austrian writerdirector Haneke, ever the psychologically brutalizing provocateur, takes an unsentimental, dignified and painfully transfixing look at infirmity and mortality. Set almost entirely in Georges and Anne’s comfortable apartment in modern-day Paris, Amour lays its groundwork early. Anne has a stroke one morning, seeming to disappear mentally for several moments. She soon ends up in a wheelchair, having lost function on one side of her body. Riva’s performance is as graceful as it is heartbreaking: There’s a joyful scene in which she laughs while spinning around in her motorized wheelchair, but also moments when she expresses a complex constellation of shame, sadness and confusion. As Anne’s health declines, Georges’ posture grows stooped and his gait clumsy. Though he remains loving and attentive, anger and frustration flash through. Further strains emerge with the entrance of their only child, Eva (the excellent Isabelle Huppert). Eva is high-strung, self-involved and powerless to understand or support her parents, and Huppert rattles the proceedings to unsettling effect. Though very little happens, Haneke builds an ominously suspenseful atmosphere, both with little details—what, for example, is the symbolism of the pigeon that keeps flying into the apartment?—and with flights of narrative unreliability. Though Amour may not contain the same cold shocks of menace or cruelty as Haneke’s other films, it also does not relent in its painful realism. And that is precisely what endows it with such power. PG13. REBECCA JACOBSON. Hollywood Theatre, Fox Tower.

Arc: An Evening of Animated Infographics

[ONE NIGHT ONLY] More interesting than it sounds. Michael Neault of Second Story Interactive Studios, an innovative company that’s been described as “the Ken Burns of interactive media,” presents a screening of infographics focused on the convergence of data visualizations and storytelling. Discussion panel to follow. Hollywood Theatre. 7:30 pm Thursday, Feb. 18.

Argo

A- Halfway through Ben Affleck’s

Argo, the main characters stage a script reading for a Flash Gordon rip-off they claim to be prepping for the screen. It’s 1980, and there are green Wookiees, gold-chained slave babes and even a Fu Manchu-sporting Emperor Ming type gathered at a table. They start reading—with terrible delivery—perhaps the most hackneyed post-Star Wars script since, well, Flash Gordon. The result is hilarious. Then something harsh happens. The dialogue fades, replaced by violent political speak from the Iranian revolution in which 52 Americans are being held hostage. This stark juxtaposition perfectly captures the tone of this thriller, a bizarre story of a joint mission between the Canadian government, the CIA and Hollywood to extract six Americans hiding in Tehran by posing as a Canuck film crew on a location shoot. It sounds like a recipe for a comic romp, but Affleck is too smart for that. A decade ago, that sentence would have drawn laughs. But over the course of the three films he’s directed, Affleck has positioned himself as something of an auteur in the Michael Mann mold: slick, concise and able

CONT. on page 36

Déjà vIEW: The Last Exorcism (left) rehashed for Part II (right).

LIES MY MULTIPLEX TOLD ME THE LAST EXORCISM PART II AND HOLLYWOOD’S APPETITE FOR DECEPTION. bY a P kRYza

243-2122

Apparently, one last go-around isn’t enough. At least that’s what this weekend’s debut of The Last Exorcism Part II: The Exorcisming seems to imply (it wasn’t screened for critics, or actually called that). There’s just too much story to tell, even when your low-budget surprise puts finality right in the title. Either that, or producers realized people might want to see more of that bloodstained girl and said, “Oh shit. We should have called this The First in a Series of Exorcisms Whose Quality Will Diminish Until People Stop Coming.” That would be honest. But The Last Exorcism is one of many flicks whose titles are either confusing or straight-up lies. Spoilers, of course, follow. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989) True, the “Last Crusade” technically refers to the old knight that Indy and his pops encounter when they reach the Holy Grail, but the title had a double meaning: It was supposed to be a sendoff for one of filmdom’s greatest heroes. Then, of course, he went on another crusade involving aliens, bouffantsporting monkeys and goddamned Shia LaBeouf. What it should be called: Indiana Jones and the Last Good Movie. The NeverEnding Story (1984) The whimsical story of boy warriors, rock-biters and dragons that look suspiciously like puppies clocks in at a sparse 102 minutes. Sure, there are a handful of sequels, but combined they still clock in at fewer minutes than Andy Warhol’s Sleep. What it should be called: The Fairly Short and Concise Story. Honey, I Blew Up the Kid (1992) Having previously shrunk his kids, Rick Moranis’ scientist takes the next logical step: He turns his gurgling, fugly toddler into something of an OshKosh Godzilla. At no point does said toddler explode, sending gigantic chunks of curly hair and baby teeth raining down on a terrified city.

What it should be called: Honey, Our Kid Got Bigulated. John Dies at the End (2012) The ultimate spoiler in the title isn’t even true. John dies toward the beginning and then spends the movie chilling in an alternate dimension. At the end, he is very much alive and ready to play in his indie-rock band. What it should be called: The Johns Are Alright. Killing Them Softly (2012) The film forgoes excessive violence for ham-fisted allegories about the financial crisis, but when people actually do get killed, it’s gruesome and loud. What it should be called: Killing Them Occasionally but Brutally. The Cider House Rules (1999) By no stretch of the word does this movie rule. It’s pandering, depressing, forced and corny. Oh, the title refers to actual rules posted in the film’s orphanage? Well, that sucks too. What it should be called: The Cider House Totally Sucks. Whip It (2009) Drew Barrymore’s grrl-power tribute to roller derby sounds like the kind of flick that would leave E.L. James quivering in ecstasy. Sadly, at no point does Ellen Page don leather for some BDSM lite. But she does discover her inner feminist by beating the shit out of other chicks, so that’s kind of rad. What it should be called: Bliss, the Flat-Track Feminist. Grown Ups (2010) Adam Sandler and his buddies go on vacation with a bunch of hot actresses and film themselves in a perpetual state of suspended adolescence as they play on water slides and get hit in the dicks. What it should be called: Rich Assholes Get Richer by Duping You Into Paying to Watch Them Behave Like Children Because You’re an Idiot, So Here Comes a Sequel. SEE IT: The Last Exorcism Part II is rated PG-13. It opens Friday at Pioneer Place, Eastport, Lloyd Center, Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Division, Oak Grove. Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

feb. 27–march 5

to tell complex stories in a straightforward manner, with subtly kinetic camera flourishes punctuating brilliant performances. From its opening sequence of rioters storming the U.S. embassy in Tehran to its white-knuckle finale, this is a film where suspense is rendered not through violence but emotional gravity. By not pandering to sentimentality, Affleck has taken what others would have turned into farce and emerged with one of the year’s best pictures. r. AP KRYZA. Clackamas, CineMagic, Lake Twin, Living Room Theaters, City Center, Division, Lloyd Mall, Movies on TV.

B-Movie Bingo: Magic Cop

[ONE NIGHT ONLY, REVIVAL, GAMES] Cross out the B-movie tropes as a unibrowed cop uses his supernatural detective skills to track down an evil magician. Hollywood Theatre. 7:30 pm Tuesday, March 5.

Beautiful Creatures

C As its teenage characters woo each other with Charles Bukowski quotes and Kurt Vonnegut references, Beautiful Creatures fancies itself an impassioned ode to overcoming alienation. But the film—despite any mileage it gains thanks to its eerie Southern gothic setting—hews closer to Twilight than to any other literary forebear. Lena (Alice Englert) is a spookily enigmatic newcomer to the small town of Gatlin, S.C. “She looks like death eatin’ a cracker,” sneers one of her prim, Bible-thumping classmates. But the Vonnegut-worshipping Ethan (Alden Ehrenreich, whose square jaw and frequently unbuttoned shirt will probably recruit him fans) quickly cozies up to Lena, even when she reveals she’s a witch under the grasp of an age-old curse. Lena swears her powers are becoming darker, but as the film plods on, all that supports such a conviction is that she wears thicker eyeliner and accidentally produces more lightning bolts. Aside from scenery-chewing turns by Jeremy Irons as a morally ambiguous dandy and Emma Thompson as an unequivocally evil witch, the cast is wideeyed and wooden. Beautiful Creatures attempts to make itself a supernatural Gone With the Wind, complete with gauzy Civil War flashbacks and a truth-telling maid (Viola Davis plays a telepathic housekeeper), but a modern-day Tara this ain’t. PG-13. REBECCA JACOBSON. Clackamas.

Bless Me, Ultima

B- In the mystical world of Bless Me, Ultima, women stick pins in doughy voodoo dolls and men vomit up physical manifestations of evil that look like squirming black Koosh balls. Carl Franklin’s film, adapted from Rudolfo Anaya’s 1972 novel, takes place in a version of 1940s New Mexico where first-graders soberly discuss sin and debate the existence of God. The story follows 7-year-old Antonio’s relationship with the elderly Ultima, a healer with herbal and magical powers. As Ultima (a graceful though one-dimensional Míriam Colón) teaches Antonio the ways of nature and of the universe, the boy must reconcile her supernatural and pagan beliefs with the doctrines of the Catholic church. This leads to an overabundance of hamfisted dialogue (“When one tampers with the fate of a man, a chain of events is set in action that none can control,” Ultima intones), as well as gratuitously pedantic narration by an adult Antonio. It’s a shame—Paula Huidobro’s cinematography nicely captures the stark beauty and dramatic weather of rural New Mexico, but this is undercut by the voice-over that painstakingly spells out each moment of significance. As Antonio, Luke Ganolon is slightly stiff but appealingly inquisitive, and for such a fablelike tale, Franklin mostly avoids mawkishness. He’s constructed a respectful adaptation, yet one that—squirming Koosh balls aside—never really pulses with its own sense of life. PG-13. REBECCA JACOBSON. Fox Tower.

British Arrow Awards

[FOUR DAYS ONLY] A 75-minute juried survey of British TV ads. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. Various times Friday-Monday, March 1-4. See nwfilm.org for schedule.

Cascade Festival of African Films

The monthlong festival concludes with a collection of films made by women. From Ghana comes Ties That Bind (noon Thursday, Feb. 28; 7:30 pm Friday, March 1), about three women who have each lost a child. The Zimbabwean film Playing Warriors (1:45 pm Thursday, Feb. 28; 7:30 pm Saturday, March 2) is a comedy about on the hunt for a husband. Screening together are Tanti and the Neighborhood Kids: Winter Vacation and The Education of Auma Obama (7:30 pm Thursday, Feb. 28). The first is a short documentary about young schoolchildren in the Malian capital Bamako (director Penda Diakité will attend), and the second about Barack Obama’s Kenyan half-sister during the 2008 election season. Another featured documentary is A Lot Like You (2 pm Saturday, March 2), Eliaichi Kimaro’s film about her African-AsianAmerican identity. Kimaro will attend the screening. Portland Community College’s Cascade Campus, Moriarty Arts and Humanities Building, Room 104, 705 N Killingsworth St. Through March 2.

Dark Skies

A horrifying force threatens a suburban family. Not screened for critics. PG-13. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Lloyd Center, Cinema 99, City Center, Division, Evergreen Parkway, Fox Tower, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Tigard.

Django Unchained

B- Give Quentin Tarantino this much: He’s got balls. Imagine entering a meeting with a major studio and pitching a relentlessly violent, big-budget revenge fantasy about an escaped slave in the pre-Civil War South who slaughters his way through Confederate plantation owners in search of his wife. If nothing else, Django Unchained has audacity going for it. But it raises a question that, ultimately, makes it tough to enjoy: When dredging up the ugliest period of American history for the sake of entertainment, is being cool enough? Because Django Unchained is exceptionally cool. A mashed-up spaghetti Western and blaxploitation flick, it is the kind of kinetic pastiche job that’s made Tarantino a genre unto himself. It’s got tight, crackling dialogue, and three actors who revel in delivering it. It’s got a handful of images— such as a close-up of a slave owner’s blood misting across cotton bolls—that are among the best in the director’s oeuvre. It’s got original music by both Ennio Morricone and Rick Ross, and a slow-motion shootout set to a posthumous collaboration between Tupac and James Brown. Why, then, did I leave the theater feeling not exhilarated but empty? Django Unchained trivializes an atrocity, and that makes it hard to digest as fun, frivolous popcorn. Tarantino has taken it upon himself to offer an extreme form of catharsis for immense suffering, but the movie’s blood lust contains little trace of actual empathy. Its staggering runtime—two hours and 45 minutes— is earned only by its three lead actors. As the sociopath-cum-abolitionist Dr. King Schultz, Christoph Waltz makes Tarantino’s words sing. Jamie Foxx finds a captivating stoicism as Django. And Leonardo DiCaprio, playing a psychotic cloaked in Southern gentility, bites down with rotted teeth into a role of slimy, slithering, utterly unsubtle evil. With Django Unchained, Tarantino has made another monument of cinematic cool. But has he made a responsible film? And does it matter? That, it turns out, is the biggest question of all. r. MATTHEW SINGER. Eastport, Lloyd Center, City Center, Evergreen Parkway, Fox Tower.

Fourplay

B [THREE NIGHTS ONLY] Within the

first 10 minutes of Fourplay, a woman receives oral sex from a dog—just so you know what you’re getting yourself in for here. Director Kyle Henry’s quartet of short films are “tales of sexual intimacy” (as the tagline goes), but they also feature Jesus fellating a man in a public restroom, a transvestite prostitute having sex with a quadriplegic’s foot and, yes, one

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

C-HUNDRED FILM CORP

MOVIES

FOURPLAY very adventurous terrier. Yet for such graphic footage, it never feels pornographic, voyeuristic or deliberately salacious (I watched half the film in a cafe before it even occurred to me it might raise an eyebrow), thanks in no small part to a wonderful current of dark comedy running throughout. Instead, the films are funny and fascinating, and they capture a truth rarely explored on film (outside of teen gross-out comedies, funnily enough): Humans, caught in the in the clutches of lust and desire, are fucked-up, hilarious creatures. If you can’t identify just a little, maybe it’s your sex life that’s weird. RUTH BROWN. Clinton Street Theater. 8 pm Friday-Sunday, March 1-3.

Getting to Know You(Tube)

[ONE NIGHT ONLY] A guided tour through the depths of YouTube. ZOMG! BABY ANIMALS! Hollywood Theatre. 7:15 pm Monday, March 4.

A Good Day to Die Hard

C+ 2007’s Live Free or Die Hard was, to the pleasant surprise of many, the best entry in the Die Hard series since we were first introduced to John McClane nearly two decades earlier. It was self-aware, funny and joyously over the top. John Moore’s A Good Day to Die Hard doubles down on that film’s maximalist approach and silly title but drifts away from nearly everything else that defines a Die Hard film. McClane has gone from a likable everyman to an indestructible super-cop. Too much attention is paid to barely coherent action sequences and too little to the once-charismatic figure in the middle of it all. At the film’s beginning, McClane flies to Moscow in order to help his gone-rogue son; once there, things quickly escalate—as they are wont to do whenever Bruce Willis’ flagship character gets involved. In hindsight, it seems not only inevitable that the all-American cowboy of a cop would eventually fight the Russians but strange that it took so long to happen. This scenario yields a number of early pleasures: It would be self-defeating to deny the joy of seeing Willis yell “Do you think I understand a word you’re saying!?” immediately after punching out an angry Muscovite. But such moments are overshadowed by the baddies’ propensity to speak only English and lazy plotting that leads to a radioactive climax in Chernobyl. Moore and writer Skip Woods also expend considerable energy creating an overly ominous atmosphere. The explosions and gunfire are often exciting despite not holding up to narrative or logical scrutiny, but they nevertheless leave one longing for the moments of levity that colored the previous entries. Which is to say: A Good Day is a decent action flick, but change a few characters’ names and it’s barely recognizable as a Die Hard movie. r. MICHAEL NORDINE. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Lloyd Center, Oak Grove, Cinema 99, Division, Evergreen Parkway, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Tigard, Sandy.

Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters

B- Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters is a totally different monkey from the rest of the neo-fairy-tale crop. This is a big, dumb action flick, which film finds that Hansel (Jeremy Renner)

and Gretel (Gemma Arterton) have grown up and developed, and now they’ve got a thing for tight leather and a knack for hunting, torturing and killing witches. Naturally, that brings them to a village terrorized by Famke Janssen. They fight. Like, a lot. The flick crackles with sadistic breathlessness—nary a head is left on its neck, and everything burns. There are a lot of glossed-over and highly disturbing subtexts one could bring up in tearing apart this film (which most critics certainly will)—among them its rampant violence toward women. But that’s reading too deeply into this tale. This is a gory confection that’s deeply flawed, horrifically acted and utterly ridiculous, but that nonetheless manages to be fun, which is something none of the other fairy-tale reimaginings of this new studio cash grab has managed. r. AP KRYZA. Division, Movies on TV.

Happy People: A Year in the Taiga

B Werner Herzog’s 2010 documen-

tary takes us to a remote fur-trapping village in central Russia, where 300 people live a long helicopter ride from civilization. Divided into segments for each of the four seasons, the film is a pastoral portrait of the villagers working wood into traps with the same tools used for generations. They seem no more or less happy than the subjects of any of Herzog’s earlier documentaries, which are better paced and far better scored than Happy People. Nevertheless, Herzog’s hilariously poignant monotone, laid over scenes of expansive and desolate beauty, helps redeem the documentary. MITCH LILLIE. Living Room Theaters.

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

B+ By the time Peter Jackson wrapped his sterling Lord of the Rings trilogy, audiences had spent nearly 12 hours in Middle Earth, marveling at the dense cinematic landscape. It was only a matter of time before J.R.R. Tolkien’s even more popular—and considerably lighter—novel The Hobbit hit the screen. Yet anyone expecting another LOTR installment or, even worse, The Phantom Hobbit, will be bowled over by the spectacle Jackson has produced. The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey takes his penchant for sprawling panoramic views, large-scale melees and lingering shots of small men gazing into the distance and distills it through the eyes of young Bilbo Baggins (Martin Freeman), prodded into adventure by the wizard Gandalf (a returning Ian McKellen, clearly enjoying himself). “All good stories deserve embellishment,” Gandalf tells Bilbo, and it’s safe to say the film delivers in a tall-tale sense, from a game of wits with snarling cockney trolls to the infamous “Riddles in the Dark” sequence with a never-morefrightening Gollum (motion-captured by Andy Serkis to perfection). After a slow and decidedly kiddie start, The Hobbit moves at the lightning pace of a chase movie intercut with stellar mini-adventures involving orcs astride wolves, gigantic spiders, soaring eagles and reanimated kings. It’s all anchored firmly by Freeman’s assured performance, which exudes charm and childlike fear. From the little man’s per-

spective, it all seems new again. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Eastport, Movies on TV.

Identity Thief

C- If an awareness of dimming economic realities were to occupy any Hollywood genre, you’d figure the gross-out comedy would be a natural fit. Shouldn’t lowest-common-denominator humor cater to the 99 percent? For the briefest of moments, as an ebullient Melissa McCarthy blithely swindles Jason Bateman’s buttoneddown Denver accounts manager by pretending to be a bank employee offering a credit protection service, there’s a hint of the anarchic zeal that could have lent Identity Thief a distinct personality. Before anyone starts pondering telemarketing fraud as a potential career, though, we’re informed that Bateman’s heroic financial services functionary can barely support his beatific family despite his tireless labor, while McCarthy lavishes her ill-gotten largess on a four-figure bar tab. McCarthy’s effervescent crassness and Bateman’s mastery of the long-suffering slow burn are as richly combustible as you’d expect, but while the sudden eruptions of frankly brutal slapstick work a treat, it’s a long slog in reclaimed-hobo trousers to get there. Identity Thief papers over gaping questions of motivation and common sense through a succession of car crashes, limp capers and even the transformative makeover, but the project as a whole is so thoroughly ill-conceived it arrives morally bankrupt. If we’ve learned anything in the past few years, it’s that there’s no such thing as a comedy too big to fail. r. JAY HORTON. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Lloyd Center, Oak Grove, Cinema 99, City Center, Division, Evergreen Parkway, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Tigard, Sandy.

The Impossible

C It’s always tricky to criticize a film for what it fails to depict rather than for what it actually captures. But in The Impossible, the omission is so glaring that to disregard it would be to commit a similarly shortsighted act of complacency. Though it centers on the 2004 tsunami that ravaged Southeast Asia and killed 230,000 people, Juan Antonio Bayona’s film is less a tale of cataclysmic human and environmental devastation than a troublingly narrow narrative about one white, privileged, European family whose vacation is spoiled by a crushing wall of water. r. REBECCA JACOBSON. Clackamas.

Into the Abyss

A- With the characteristically dis-

consolate title Into the Abyss, Werner Herzog’s death-row movie has less of the “travelogue with philosophical footnotes” quality that has marked (and sometimes cheapened) his recent output. It helps that the director, who conducts jailhouse interviews from offscreen, for once cannot possibly be more gloomy or absurd than his subject. He is the second documentary master to tackle true crime this year: Into the Abyss is far bleaker than Errol Morris’ Tabloid, but no less nuts. Herzog profiles Michael Perry, executed by the state of Texas on July 1, 2010, for the killing of three people— including a mother and son—in order to steal a red Chevy Camaro from a home’s garage inside a gated community. Meeting with victims’ relatives, other convicts and Perry himself (eight days before lethal injection), Herzog elicits bewildering details from staggeringly luckless people. As Perry maintains his innocence against a landfill of evidence, the bucktoothed 28-yearold man recalls how the one opportunity afforded him in his teen years, an Outward Bound canoe trip to the Everglades, culminated (à la Aguirre) in an attack by monkeys. Herzog remains peerless as a poet of logistics. He notices that the car Perry once wanted has sat in an impound lot for 10 years. While Perry waited to die, a tree grew inside it. PG-13. AARON MESH. Fifth Avenue Cinema. 7 and 9:30 pm FridaySaturday, 3 pm Sunday, March 1-3.

Koch

B In this film’s opening scene, former

New York City mayor Edward Koch looks out an airplane window while

FEB. 27–MARCH 5 sages for ham-handed schlock and slack-jawed awe. And unlike better feel-good films, which slowly lock their fangs around your heart, Life of Pi seems downright manipulative. It begins in French India, where Pi’s family owns a zoo. After some clunky exposition, the family loads its menagerie onto a ship bound for Canada, but a massive storm lands Pi on a lifeboat with the aforementioned tiger. Visually, this is where the film picks up: The ocean swirls with phosphorescent plankton and jellyfish, a shimmering whale glides across the frame and the starry sky blurs with the glistening sea. Such sequences call to mind those Ravensburger jigsaw puzzles of underwater scenes with glowing moons and rainbow-hued fish. Less successfully, they reminded me of the neon Lisa Frank dolphin stickers I used to slap on my ele-

mentary-school notebooks. But structurally, Life of Pi is—like the one it features onscreen—a shipwreck. Tedious scenes of an adult Pi and a Canadian author (presumably Martel) frame the ﬁlm’s dramatic center, making the allegorical conceit all the schmaltzier. When at sea, Life of Pi’s grand visuals pick up some of the story’s slack. But back on land, it just runs aground. PG. REBECCA JACOBSON. Eastport, St. Johns Twin, City Center, Lloyd Mall, Movies on TV.

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B Lincoln opens with a shot of Abraham’s very large, very statuesque head. As the camera pans to the front, the eﬀect is startling.

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CONT. on page 38

REVIEW

UPCOMING IN-STORE PERFORMANCES FALLEN RIVIERA FRIDAY 3/1 @ 6 PM

After building a loyal fan base and receiving an artist endorsement with Casio, Fallen Riviera recorded “Somebody Take Me,” earning the band an artist profile in Music Connection Magazine. The band is now set to release their much-anticipated debut full-length album, “Another World”, recorded with Wyn Davis and Ken Scott.

HEY MARSEILLES

SATURDAY 3/2 @ 3 PM

D Tom Hooper’s Les Misérables

Life of Pi

C Ignore the tiger for a moment. Ang Lee’s Life of Pi is a very simple story with a grandiose backdrop. For much of the film, we’re alone on a lifeboat, in the middle of the Pacific, with a boy and a Bengal. Rendered in sumptuous 3-D, the swoony special effects and churning waves create a palpable sense of motion. But the story lacks such pull. Based on Yann Martel’s Booker Prize-winning novel, the film surrenders the book’s more subtle mes-

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Les Misérables

lives up to its name. With the exception of about 10 minutes, the nearly three-hour film is an endless wallow in the fields of squalor, filth, chancre and herpes. Derived from Victor Hugo’s humanitarian novel, already a doorstop weepie, Les Miz is in musical form a bathetic pressure washer loaded with human tears. In Hooper’s (The King’s Speech) loose directorial grip, this water cannon jerks itself around as in an old Looney Tunes cartoon, spraying the world with salty liquid. As the saintly thief-gone-noble Jean Valjean pursued by the relentless Javert (Russell Crowe) through the streets of 19th-century France, Hugh Jackman is a terrifically convincing physical presence. But he is hobbled by Hooper’s decision to have the actors sing every line. Jackman is more a song-and-dance man than a balladeer, and his trilling over-enunciation bleeds his character of any possible nuance. Crowe, likewise, sounds less like a punctilious follower of the law than a barband bellower who needs a drink. Despite some expensive-looking overhead shots of degraded French life, Hooper’s epic film is centered doggedly on the suffering found in a human face. In the case of Anne Hathaway as the dying prostitute Fantine, this is a wise decision. She becomes a Jeanne D’Arc figure, ruined and beatific, sobbingly and haltingly wresting “I Dreamed a Dream” from Susan Boyle with the imperfections of her rendition. Les Miz is, more than anything, painfully obvious Oscar bait. In shooting relentlessly for a statuette, Hooper makes all of humanity into much the same thing: heavy and small, shining on the surface but just plain dead on the inside. PG-13. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Clackamas, Indoor Twin, Vancouver.

A WEEK !!!

THE PEEP HOLE

Lincoln

WA R N E R B R O S . E N T E R TA I N M E N T I N C .

flying over the metropolis he once governed. “This belongs to me,” he says. “It’s extraordinary. Thank you, God.” There’s bombast to that statement, but first-time director Neil Barsky doesn’t dwell on it. He’s content to let the famously blunt and often inflammatory man speak for himself, which Koch does happily and humorously. When Koch came into power in 1978, New York was a beleaguered city on the brink of bankruptcy. When he was voted out, in 1989, crime and poverty persisted, but the city had begun its renaissance. With a mix of talking-head interviews and archival footage, the documentary charts the major touchstones of Koch’s career: the tight 1977 election, the colossal housing projects he oversaw, a major transit strike in 1980 (in a characteristic moment, Koch good-naturedly joins the pedestrian masses on the Brooklyn Bridge and stares down striking workers). Barsky, a former Wall Street Journal reporter, also touches on the lowlights, including Koch’s failure to respond to the AIDS crisis. In the end, Koch winds up serving as a eulogy—Koch died the week the film was released in New York, and Barsky even includes footage of him contemplating how his obituary will read. In one scene, Koch discusses why he doesn’t want one of the Jewish cemeteries opened up for him, noting that such graveyards get no foot traffic. “I want to be in a bustling cemetery,” he crows. With a self-congratulatory yet somewhat wistful laugh, he goes on: “My plot will be on the subway.” REBECCA JACOBSON. Living Room Theaters.

MOVIES

Hey Marseilles first won hearts with its “sublime and heartfelt” debut, “To Travels and Trunks”. Six years later, they’ve come a long way, and the 12 songs on “Lines We Trace” represent a band steady enough in its sound—poignant, panoramic, and unreservedly gorgeous—that it can expand beyond it.

FEE FI FO FUM: Nicholas Hoult.

JACK THE GIANT SLAYER An English folktale, with extra potty humor.

Jack and the Beanstalk is one of the few English folktales Americans know by heart. A peasant boy sells his abusive guardian’s livestock for some beans, the beans get wet, a beanstalk grows, and off he goes to rescue a princess from a bread-crazed giant in the sky. Combining that G-rated Beanstalk yarn with all the decapitations and anus-stabbing of the true Arthurian legend, Jack the Giant Slayer is a grimy retelling of the children’s tale…in 3-D. The film opens in the kingdom of Cloister. The kingdom fought a terrible war with a horde of giants many years ago, so long ago that few believe giants ever existed. All that remains is a children’s book written in clerihew verse—well, that and some magic beans. The titular Jack, played by Nicholas Hoult (About a Boy, Warm Bodies), is an awkward farm boy who has grown up obsessed with this children’s tale, as has Princess Isabelle (Eleanor Tomlinson), the rebellious descendant of the king who defeated the giants. Alas, the princess is unhappily betrothed to the ambitious nobleman Roderick (Stanley Tucci, sporting the goatee of evil). Tucci is given the thankless role of a cartoonish bad guy who does evil things to advance the plot. Said plot plods along, until the beans start sprouting. Given the history of this tale, it’s surprising it took until 2013 for a major studio to tackle the rapidly growing beanstalk with CGI. It’s a spectacle unto itself as the sinewy tendrils rip through the ground, out of the cabin and into the sky. In an equally impressive CGI feat, a giant picks his nose while wrapping Ewan McGregor in a pancake. It’s up to Jack and several others (including McGregor, having fun as an upbeat captain of the guard) to save the damsel in distress at the top of the beanstalk. But the story isn’t particularly important, and the film can’t decide whether it wants to be serious or tongue-in-cheek. No, Jack the Giant Slayer is focused on moving from one epic fantasy scene to another, whether it’s McGregor shouting “Tally ho!” as he zip-lines across the beanstalk or a twoheaded giant (Bill Nighy) bursting through a tiled floor. And to that end, it’s a great deal of fun. JOHN LOCANTHI.

ERIN MCKEOWN

MONDAY 3/4 @ 6 PM

After eight full-length records, three EPs, and 12 years of touring the globe non-stop, writer, performer, and multiinstrumentalist Erin McKeown is just getting warmed up. Erin’s compelling and energy packed stage show teamed with her seemingly effortless ability to bridge genres has garnered her international acclaim. On “Manifestra”, McKeown merges personal and political passions in 10 original songs.

SONGWRITERS CIRCLE: MUSIC MILLENNIUM’S OWN

ROBIN WASHBURN - JOHN GAVIN - ROB SHAFFER MONDAY 3/4 @ 7 PM

Music Millennium serves as the day job for many talented musicians, artists, and yes, even songwriters. Robin Washburn, John Gavin and Rob Shaffer have each played and sung in numerous bands from as far away as Baltimore and St. Augustine, as near as Portland, and along the way have written some really cool songs in the process.

DANIEL BACHMAN TUESDAY 3/5 @ 6 PM

Daniel Bachman has been playing what he describes as “psychedelic Appalachia” since he was a teenager, with a sound that evolved from drones and banjos to a guitar centered focus. “Seven Pines” is a combination of homesick worried blues and the ecstatic buzz of fresh experience and a new life in unknown territory.

B SEE IT: Jack the Giant Slayer is rated PG-13. It opens Friday at Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Lloyd Center, Cinema 99, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen Parkway, Hilltop, Lloyd Mall, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Tigard.

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

feb. 27–maRch 5

Though the 16th president has been put to film many times before, no one has looked the part like Daniel Day-Lewis. He’s a ringer: hollowed cheeks, slightly unruly mop of hair, a creased forehead and heavy brow. So when Day-Lewis first moves and speaks, it’s weirdly disquieting. But the initial shock of a reanimated Abe quickly fades, because Day-Lewis’ portrayal goes beyond physical likeness: His performance is brilliantly malleable, fully inhabited and deeply transfixing. It’s Oscar bait of the highest order. The same can’t be said for all of Lincoln. Though Steven Spielberg’s stately drama is shrewd, balanced and impressively restrained, it’s also dogged by a waxy stuffiness, made worse by Janusz Kaminski’s cinematography, which is so dark and blue it looks bruised. Focusing on the fight to abolish slavery in the first few months of 1865, the film turns in mesmerizing moments of political wheeling and dealing, as well as blistering debates and brazen name-calling on the House floor—it’s C-SPAN with waistcoats and muttonchops. More like a stage production than a Spielbergian spectacle, some of the best dialogue comes during the boisterous House vote on the 13th Amendment. Though we know the result, Spielberg manages to imbue the scene with moral complexity and gripping tension, as well as rowdy humor. It’s both inspirational and disheartening: Could contemporary politicians overcome such partisan gridlock? “Say all we’ve done is shown the world that democracy isn’t chaos?” Lincoln asks at one point. Nearly 150 years on, can we claim the same? PG13. REBECCA JACOBSON. Cedar Hills, Indoor Twin, Division, Fox Tower, Tigard.

Lore

B- Cate Shortland’s Lore fancies itself

an atypical World War II movie. Insofar as it’s told from the perspective of a 14-year-old German daughter of SS parents, it lives up to that distinction. Fleeing but not necessarily repentant, Lore (Saskia Rosendahl, excellent in her debut) and her four younger siblings trek through the Black Forest and struggle to reconcile who they know themselves to be with the way the postwar tide is turning. A constant stream of saturated colors and soft focus make Lore a gorgeous visual experience, but the story line isn’t always as powerful as the premise suggests it could be. Though Shortland has yet to realize her considerable potential fully, she and her second film are both worth watching. MICHAEL NORDINE. Living Room Theaters.

One Life

A feature-length BBC nature documentary narrated by (who else?) Daniel Craig. Living Room Theaters.

Portland Black Film Festival

Ending the monthlong festival is Shout Troubles Over, a collection of rare archival footage of gospel performances. Hollywood Theatre. 7:30 pm Wednesday, Feb. 27.

Quartet

B You’ve seen this film before: A pack of love-drunk song-and-dancers needs a ton of money to save their home, so they band together to put on a big music show. Can they pull it off? Will the big star agree to take part? Heck, it’s the plot of at least two Muppets movies. But in Quartet, Dustin Hoffman’s twilight directorial debut, the stars are neither Muppets nor moppets, but septuagenarians. The film, which takes place in a ridiculously well-appointed retirement home for former classical musicians, acts as both valedictory and wake for an entire passing generation of British actors and musicians—notably Maggie Smith, Michael Gambon, Billy Connolly and Tom Courtenay, alongside a host of former opera stars. The ensemble includes the requisite caring doctor (Sheridan Smith), comedic aging Lothario (Connolly) and tragically dippy Alzheimer’s patient (Pauline Collins, liar-liar Sarah on Upstairs, Downstairs), who all help an old, proud couple learn to live and love again. But it’s surprisingly fun. Maggie Smith plays Maggie Smith, of course—which is to say she walks around scaring

the living shit out of everybody—but by the end it’s a lovely and vulnerable performance. Connolly, meanwhile, performs joyful frottage on every scene. While Quartet toys with treacherous sentimentality, it saves itself by virtue of a cheery patience in exposition rivaled only by midafternoon ads for motorized wheelchairs. Following up on France’s All Together, starring Jane Fonda, Quartet is the second high-profile film in about a year to feature an ensemble of lovelorn retirees. Of the two, Quartet is much less ambitious and much more successful. While Hoffman seems very aware he’s gently closing the book on an entire generation of entertainers, he nonetheless allows them to do what they’ve always done best: be entertaining. PG13. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Cedar Hills, Hollywood Theatre, Fox Tower.

Reel Feminism: Standing on My Sisters’ Shoulders

[ONE NIGHT ONLY] The series, presented by In Other Words, continues with a documentary about female leaders of the civil rights movement in 1950s and ’60s Mississippi. Clinton Street Theater. 7 pm Wednesday, Feb. 27.

Safe Haven

D In this happily-ever-after version

of domestic violence, based on a Nicholas Sparks novel, Katie (Julianne Hough) flees an abusive relationship, blood on her hands, with the help of her neighbor, an elderly cherrypicker. Her safe haven manifests itself as a tiny Southern beach town, fortuitously home to the tan and chiseled Alex (Josh Duhamel). While Katie copes with the trauma by repainting her kitchen floor canary yellow, Sparksian flames ignite between her and widower Alex. No one saw that coming. Fans of Dear John (Safe Haven is also directed by Lasse Hallström) and The Last Song can enjoy a good heart flutter as Alex lifts Katie off her feet and passionately presses her against a tree. But the deranged, abusive husband won’t disappear so easily, and the events that follow will offend—if not outrage— feminists and anyone remotely knowledgeable about domestic abuse. Think J.Lo’s Enough, deep-fried and coated with extra sugar. PG-13. ENID SPITZ. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Cinema 99, City Center, Division, Evergreen Parkway, Lloyd Mall, Movies on TV, Sherwood.

Searching for Sugar Man

B- Gaining an appreciable level of success outside of one’s home country is not an unusual feat. What’s stranger is for that artist to have no clue about his or her fame in some far-flung country until nearly 30 years after the fact. Such is the case with Rodriguez, a Detroit-born musician recognized in the U.S. only by crate diggers and music scholars who revel in the darker recesses of the psychedelic era. In the documentary Searching for Sugar Man, freshman director Malik Bendjelloul reveals that in South Africa, a world away from where they were recorded, his albums were revered. Bendjelloul plays out the story of Rodriguez like a detective novel, adding pieces to the puzzle via interviews with producers who worked with the musician, as well as a South African record-store owner and a journalist who both worked tirelessly to uncover the truth behind Rodriguez’s “disappearance”—the prevailing rumor being that he committed suicide onstage. About halfway through Sugar Man, it is revealed that Rodriguez is alive, well, and still living in Detroit, working as a manual laborer. Once that is uncovered, the now nearly 70-year-old musician is placed in front of the camera. Only then does the film take flight. PG-13. ROBERT HAM. Living Room Theaters.

Side Effects

B- Warning: Steven Soderbergh’s new film may cause anxiety, frustration, terror, temporary memory loss, episodes of euphoria, Hitchcockian feelings of nostalgia, numbing, exhilaration, dread and apathy. Side effects of Side Effects may also include jaw clenching and eye rolling.

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

S U M M I T E N T E R TA I N M E N T

MOVIES

SNITCH Consumption of Side Effects is recommended with a grain of salt. Soderbergh is a master of genre jumping, and with Side Effects, he combines the medical horrors of 2011’s middling Contagion with a noirstyle narrative about a young woman (Rooney Mara) who commits a horrendous crime while under the influence of a radical new antidepressant. What emerges is a nail biter that eventually sacrifices a gorgeous concept for standard mystery beats. But the setup, a story about the casualties of mental-health treatment, is damn jarring. Mara puts in a performance that’s completely counter to the feel-good depression of Silver Linings Playbook, painting a portrait of mental illness and paranoia that lodges directly under the skin. Suicidal and prone to sleepwalking, she reaches out to an overworked psychiatrist (Jude Law), who puts her on the experimental antidepressant. It doesn’t go so well. The first hour plays like a nightmare in which you occupy the head of a severely disturbed mental patient, an effect augmented by jittery sound design that gives the illusion of constant whispers following Mara. Alas, just as the film ratchets up the jitters and paranoia, it takes a turn for the conventional in the second half, which focuses on Law doing an awful lot of Googling and stoic staring before the film hits the safety net of ho-hum conspiracy theory and conventional thriller tropes. For all its emotional buildup and unease, Side Effects eventually suffers from multiple personalities. R. AP KRYZA. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Fox Tower, Lloyd Mall.

Silver Linings Playbook

A- With his first two pictures—1994’s

Spanking the Monkey and 1996’s Flirting With Disaster—director David O. Russell showed a mastery of familial discomfort, bringing to life the hilarity of tense situational extremes. In his mainstream work—the excellent boxing drama The Fighter and war-film deconstruction Three Kings—he demonstrated a keen eye for the comic potential of the self-destruction of the family unit. With Silver Linings Playbook, Russell revisits these themes and emerges with one of filmdom’s funniest stories of crippling manic depression. If Frank Capra had made an R-rated flick for the Prozac generation, it would look like this. The film follows the social reacclimation of Philly schoolteacher Pat (Bradley Cooper), who is institutionalized after beating his wife’s lover half to death. Pat forms an unlikely relationship with widow Tiffany (Jennifer Lawrence), who doggedly tries to win his affections despite the fact that he’s set on winning back the unwilling wife. Silver Linings strikes a delicate balance. This is a film that invites uncomfortable giggles at mental illness before exploding into frightening reality, as when a meet-cute segues into a terrifying domestic incident, with Cooper delivering an Oscar-caliber breakdown set to a Led Zeppelin song. As Pat’s loving dad with a history of violence, Robert De Niro lends a crushing and funny layer to an already marvelously dense story. As a family drama, Silver Linings is top tier. As a romance, it’s blissfully unconventional. And as a foulmouthed ode to classic

Hollywood, well, Capra would have fucking approved. R. AP KRYZA. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Lake Twin, Moreland, Cinema 99, City Center, Evergreen Parkway, Fox Tower, Lloyd Mall, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Tigard, St. Johns Twin.

Snitch

C+ “Inspired by true events” reads the

opening title card of the oddly engrossing new thriller Snitch, written and directed by Ric Roman Waugh. The earliest scenes, while never what you’d call realistic, establish a premise essentially recognizable. Some kids fall victim to dopey choices and abysmal luck landing a teenager in federal custody after signing for a buddy’s ecstasy shipment. But as the unlikely tumbles into the improbable and crashes into the lunatic, a disregard for parameters of the real seems less fanciful than arrogant. U.S. attorneys would not encourage successful family men with political connections to play undercover supercop. Midwestern business owners can’t learn the basics of narcotic trafficking online, pick out the right flavor of ex-con already under payroll and leap upward to the inner circle of a Mexican cartel. All things considered, the unrelenting tone of high seriousness imposed on spiraling implausibilities would have proven unbearable with anyone besides Dwayne Johnson playing the lead. In the closest he’s yet come to a strictly dramatic role, with eyebrows affixed at half mast and alien physicality buried beneath leisure wear, the Rock still bears only the slightest resemblance to actual people. As de facto straight man sharing the screen with Barry Pepper’s creaky simmer, Jon Berthal’s bodily seething, and Michael K. Williams’ preening languor, Johnson more than holds his own, and he hits the right blend of frustrated confusion when asked to emote. When momentum finally takes the wheel in the final 20 minutes, the abandonment of all pretense of coherency arrives as odd comfort. If the disjointed events aren’t quite inspired by truth, at least they feel honest. PG-13. JAY HORTON. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Living Room Theaters, Oak Grove, Cinema 99, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Tigard, Sandy.

Sound City

Through interviews and performances, Dave Grohl’s documentary pays tribute to the legendary (and nowdefunct) Los Angeles recording studio. Hollywood Theatre.

Triple Fisher: The Lethal Lolitas of Long Island

[ONE NIGHT ONLY] When suburban New York teenager Amy Fisher shot her lover’s wife in the face in 1992, the lurid saga led to three made-forTV movies. Director Dan Kapelovitz mashes those three movies together in one monster melodrama. Hollywood Theatre. 7 pm Sunday, March 3.

Warm Bodies

B+ “Don’t be creepy, don’t be creepy,

don’t be creepy,” the lovesick zombie begs himself as he stares, slack-jawed, at the very blond, very alive object of his affection. His name is “R” (he thinks) and he’s your average twen-

tysomething zombie. He’s conflicted about all the killing, but considering his only way to reconnect to the world is to download a human’s memories by devouring their brains, he’ll take it. That is, until he locks eyes with shotgun-wielding Julie and falls head over undead heels in love. In a genre already clogged with teens trysting with milquetoast vampires and hunky werewolves, forcing zombies to woo humans sounds like a calculating cash grab. But director Jonathan Levine’s goofy wisp of a film, based on Seattle author Isaac Marion’s 2011 novel, is a charming lurch through zombieland that bypasses the usual headshots to aim at the heart—and scores a surprisingly direct hit. It helps that Nicholas Hoult is the world’s cutest corpse: all mussed hair, starburst eyes and deep-shadowed lids…and a little mouth slime. After saving Julie from his “friends” (including a hilariously marble-mouthed Rob Corddry), he courts her with canned fruit cocktail and Coronas. Men do a lot of strange things for a date, but this is the only case (so far) of a dude eating a girl’s boyfriend’s brain in order to get to know her better. When Julie (Teresa Palmer) starts to warm up to her undead suitor, he in turn remembers how to be human. Eventually the pair must face skeletal, fury-filled zombies called “bonies” and, even scarier, John Malkovich (as the human resistance leader and Julie’s dad). The CGI effects are laughable, and it takes a while to adjust to the willfully cheeseball tone. But once it clicks, it’s irresistible. In this world, all you need is love. And sometimes a shotgun. PG-13. KELLY CLARKE. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Forest, Lloyd Center, Division, Evergreen Parkway, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place.

Zero Dark Thirty

A- For all the talk about torture Zero

Dark Thirty has generated, you’d be forgiven for thinking director Kathryn Bigelow spends 157 minutes depicting detainees being waterboarded, strung up with ropes and crammed into confinement boxes. This is, of course, not the case. The majority of the film is an intricate police procedural about the decadelong hunt for Osama bin Laden, with a 30-minute climax depicting the assault on his Abbottabad compound. But those scenes of torture, front-loaded in the first third of the film, dredge up such challenging, uncomfortable and important moral questions it’s no wonder they’ve dominated discussion since before Zero Dark Thirty was released. Yet I’m unable to see the film as some rah-rah, kill-the-motherfucker piece of jingoism that pines for the days when detainees wore dog collars. Instead, it’s as uncomfortable in its relentlessly raw representations of torture as it is in its characters’ emotionally ambiguous reactions—or nonreactions—to those acts of torture. Take the first scene of torture: CIA officer Maya (Jessica Chastain) has just arrived in Pakistan and is present for the violent interrogation of a detainee named Ammar. Maya cringes, clenches her jaw, clasps her arms across her chest and at one point covers her eyes. But there’s an unsettling slightness to these reactions. The torture is terrible and sad in its brutality; Maya’s reactions are terrible and sad in their faintness. Where Maya shows no faintness is in her single-minded drive to root out bin Laden, which Chastain fiercely portrays. Her determination, as we know, pays off, and Zero Dark Thirty builds to the pivotal raid on bin Laden’s compound by a group of Navy SEALs. Largely shot with night-vision lenses, it’s a dramatic shift from earlier cinematographic naturalism, but it remains eerily and grippingly real. The suspense is thick, the carnage plentiful, and the celebration brief and fraught—this is no simple act of triumphalism. Much like the film’s earlier depictions of torture, it’s wrenchingly decisive yet, ultimately, inconclusive. R. REBECCA JACOBSON. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Evergreen Parkway, Fox Tower, Lloyd Mall, Tigard.

MOVIES

MARCH 1–7

BREWVIEWS T H E W E I N S T E I N CO M PA N Y

CITY Sat-Sun 02:15, 04:30 TRIPLE FISHER: LETHAL LOLITAS OF LONG ISLAND Sun 07:30 GETTING TO KNOW YOUTUBE Mon 07:15 MAGIC COP Tue 07:30 PUMP UP THE VOLUME Wed 07:00

Regal Fox Tower Stadium 10

PAGING TOM CRUISE: Paul Thomas Anderson’s The Master is the film Scientology maybe doesn’t want you to see. But while it makes deliberate allusions to L. Ron Hubbard’s sci-fi pseudo-religion, that’s not what it’s actually about. For the first 30 minutes, we’re alone with Joaquin Phoenix’s Freddie Quell. In that time, he mimes intercourse with a female-shaped sand sculpture, then masturbates into the ocean; undergoes a Rorschach test in which he reports seeing only genitalia; and attempts to choke a customer at his postwar job as a mall photographer. Stowing away on a boat, Quell eventually encounters Lancaster Dodd (Philip Seymour Hoffman), a pink-hued huckster selling salvation through “the Cause,” a self-help movement based on a variation of repressed-memory therapy. It’s here that Anderson drops in bits of Hubbard’s biography. But as Quell and Dodd become increasingly intertwined, the Scientology allegories fade into the background. Abetted by grandiose 65 mm cinematography and a crazymaking score from Radiohead’s Jonny Greenwood, The Master is an ambitious enigma that never figures itself out, and that’s precisely what made it one of 2012’s best films. MATTHEW SINGER. Showing at: Academy, Laurelhurst. Best paired with: Ninkasi Oatis Oatmeal Stout. Also showing: Alien Boy: The Life and Death of James Chasse. (Cinema 21). Cinema 21

Lloyd Center 10 and IMAX

1510 NE Multnomah St., 800326-3264 JACK THE GIANT SLAYER 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 03:50, 09:35 JACK THE GIANT SLAYER Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue 12:30, 06:45 21 AND OVER Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue 11:50, 02:15, 04:40, 07:15, 10:30 THE LAST EXORCISM PART II Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 01:00, 03:55, 06:55, 09:45 DJANGO UNCHAINED FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue 11:35, 03:10, 06:50, 09:25 WARM BODIES Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue 12:20, 02:50, 05:20, 07:50, 10:25 IDENTITY THIEF Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue 12:40, 03:40, 07:05, 09:55 SNITCH Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue 12:45, 03:35, 07:10, 10:00 DARK SKIES Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 12:10, 02:40, 05:10, 07:40, 10:20 A GOOD DAY TO DIE HARD Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 11:45, 02:20, 04:55, 07:30, 10:05 THE METROPOLITAN OPERA: PARSIFAL LIVE Sat 09:00 THE METROPOLITAN OPERA: RIGOLETTO ENCORE Wed 06:30

Regal Lloyd Mall 8

2320 Lloyd Center Mall, 800-326-3264 PHANTOM Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 12:30, 03:20, 06:30, 08:50 JACK THE GIANT SLAYER 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 12:00, 03:30 THE LOST MEDALLION: THE ADVENTURES OF BILLY STONE Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 12:30, 03:30, 06:30, 08:50 ESCAPE FROM PLANET EARTH 3D

Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 06:20 ESCAPE FROM PLANET EARTH Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:15, 03:20, 08:30 SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:25, 03:15, 06:00, 08:45 ARGO Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 02:50, 06:15, 08:55 LIFE OF PI 3D FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:05, 02:55, 06:05, 08:55 SAFE HAVEN Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:20, 03:05, 06:05, 08:40 SIDE EFFECTS Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 12:10 ZERO DARK THIRTY Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 07:00

Avalon Theatre & Wunderland

3451 SE Belmont St., 503238-1617 GANGSTER SQUAD FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:50, 08:55 PARENTAL GUIDANCE Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 01:05, 03:00 JACK REACHER Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:55, 07:15 THIS IS 40 Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 09:35 RISE OF THE GUARDIANS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:55, 07:00 WRECK-IT RALPH Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 02:50

Bagdad Theater and Pub

3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-249-7474 BEASTS OF THE SOUTHERN WILD Fri-SatSun-Tue-Wed 06:00 JACK REACHER Sat-Sun-TueWed 08:20 RISE OF THE GUARDIANS Sat-Sun 02:00

616 NW 21st Ave., 503-223-4515 ALIEN BOY: THE LIFE AND DEATH OF JAMES CHASSE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:30, 07:00, 09:00

Clinton Street Theater

2522 SE Clinton St., 503-238-8899 FOURPLAY Fri-Sat-SunWed 08:00 REPO! THE GENETIC OPERA Fri 12:00 THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW Sat 12:00 Mon-Tue SPECIAL MISSION LADY CHAPLIN Wed 08:00

Mission Theater and Pub

1624 NW Glisan St., 503-249-7474-5 PORTLANDIA Fri 07:00, 10:00 GANGSTER SQUAD Sat-Sun-Tue 08:15 THIS IS 40 Sun-Tue 05:30

St. Johns Twin Cinemas and Pub

8704 N Lombard St., 503-286-1768 SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:45, 08:20 LIFE OF PI Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:15, 07:55

CineMagic Theatre

2021 S.E. Hawthorne Blvd., 503-231-7919 ARGO Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 05:30, 08:00

Fifth Avenue Cinema 510 SW Hall St., 503-725-3551 INTO THE ABYSS Fri-SatSun 03:00

Hollywood Theatre

4122 NE Sandy Blvd., 503281-4215 AMOUR Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 06:45, 09:15 QUARTET Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 07:10, 09:00 THE SHOP AROUND THE CORNER Fri 05:30 SOUND

846 SW Park Ave., 800-326-3264 PHANTOM Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:45, 02:45, 05:20, 07:35, 09:45 DARK SKIES FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:50, 02:40, 04:55, 07:10 SIDE EFFECTS Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:50, 02:00, 05:25, 07:25, 09:45 AMOUR Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:00, 02:05, 05:00, 07:00, 09:40 QUARTET Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:45, 02:00, 04:45, 07:30 DJANGO UNCHAINED Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 02:05, 04:10, 07:45, 09:15 ZERO DARK THIRTY Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:30, 02:15, 04:20, 07:50, 09:20 SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 11:30, 02:10, 04:45, 07:20, 09:50 LINCOLN Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:10, 03:20, 06:30, 09:30 BLESS ME, ULTIMA Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:40, 02:20, 04:40, 07:00, 09:40

Regal Pioneer Place Stadium 6

340 SW Morrison St., 800-326-3264 JACK THE GIANT SLAYER 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 12:45, 03:45, 07:00, 10:00 21 AND OVER FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:30, 04:30, 07:30, 10:10 THE LAST EXORCISM PART II Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 01:20, 04:15, 07:15, 09:50 WARM BODIES Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:50, 03:30, 06:30, 09:20 IDENTITY THIEF Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:00, 03:50, 06:40, 09:30 A GOOD DAY TO DIE HARD Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:10, 03:55, 06:50, 09:40

Street page 17

News

page 7

St. Johns Theatre

8203 N Ivanhoe St., 503249-7474-6 RISE OF THE GUARDIANS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 06:30 GANGSTER SQUAD Fri-Sat-Mon-TueWed 01:00, 08:50 THE WALKING DEAD Sun 06:00, 08:00

Living Room Theaters

341 SW 10th Ave., 971-222-2010 56 UP Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 12:10, 06:35 ARGO Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 12:00, 02:00, 04:35, 07:15, 09:15 HAPPY PEOPLE: A YEAR IN THE TAIGA Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 11:55, 03:00, 05:10, 07:40, 09:45 KOCH Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 11:50, 02:45, 04:50, 07:00, 09:40 LORE FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:45, 01:50, 04:20, 06:45, 09:00 OSCAR SHORTS PROGRAM A Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:30 OSCAR SHORTS PROGRAM B Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 02:10 SEARCHING FOR SUGAR MAN Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 09:30 SNITCH Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 12:15, 02:30, 05:00, 07:30, 09:50 SUBJECT TO CHANGE. CALL THEATERS OR VISIT WWEEK.COM/MOVIETIMES FOR THE MOST UP-TODATE INFORMATION FRIDAY-THURSDAY, MARCH 1-7, UNLESS OTHERWISE INDICATED

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

CLASSIFIEDS DIRECTORY 40 WELLNESS

40 JOBS

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COUNSELING Counseling Individuals, Couples and Groups Stephen Shostek, CET Relationships, Life Transitions, Personal Growth

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SEWING & ALTERATIONS N Spiderweb Sewing Studio 503-750-6586 spiderwebsewingstudio@gmail.com 7204 N. Leonard St Portland, Or 97203

HOME IMPROVEMENT SW Jill Of All Trades

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TREE SERVICE NE Steve Greenberg Tree Service 1925 NE 61st Ave. Portland, Oregon 97213 503-774-4103

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43 REAL ESTATE

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Is now hiring SERVERS and LINE COOKS! Qualified apps must have an open & flex sched including, days, eves, wknds and holidays. We are looking for applicants who have prev exp and enjoy working in a busy customer serviceoriented enviro. Please apply online 24/7 at www.mcmenamins.com or pick up a paper app at any McMenamins location. Mail to 430 N. Killingsworth, Portland OR, 97217 or fax: 503-221-8749. Call 503-952-0598 for info on other ways to apply. Please no phone calls or emails to individ locs! E.O.E.

Ruby Spa in Forest Grove Is now hiring LMTs and Nail Techs! Qualified apps must have an open & flex sched including, days, eves, wknds and holidays. We are looking for applicants who have prev exp and enjoy working in a busy customer service-oriented enviro. Please apply online 24/7 at www.mcmenamins.com or pick up a paper app at any McMenamins location. Mail to 430 N. Killingsworth, Portland OR, 97217 or fax: 503-221-8749. Call 503-952-0598 for info on other ways to apply. Please no phone calls or emails to individ locs! E.O.E.

MUSICIANS MARKET www.ExtrasOnly.com

FOR FREE ADS in 'Musicians Wanted,' 'Musicians Available' & 'Instruments for Sale' go to portland.backpage.com and submit ads online. Ads taken over the phone in these categories cost $5.

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PAINTING

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SUPPORT GROUPS ALANON Sunday Rainbow

5:15 PM meeting. G/L/B/T/Q and friends. Downtown Unitarian Universalist Church on 12th above Taylor. 503-309-2739.

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BUILDING/REMODELING

HEALTH

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IF YOU USED THE MIRENA IUD between 2001-present and suffered perforation or embedment in the uterus requiring surgical removal, or had a child born with birth defects you may be entitled to compensation. Call Johnson Law and speak with female staff members 1-800-535-5727

featuring Grammy nominee Aashish Khan on Sarod accompanied by Pranesh Khan on Tabla.

CLEANING

LANDSCAPING

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): In the language of the Huron Indians, “orenda” is a word that refers to the spiritual power that resides in all creatures and things. If you’ve got enough of it, you may be able to declare at least partial independence from your own past. You can better shape the life you want for yourself rather than being so thoroughly subject to the limitations of your karma and conditioning. I happen to believe that your current supply of orenda is unusually abundant, Gemini. What’s the best use you can make of it?

MOTOR GENERAL “Atomic Auto New School Technology, Old School Service” www.atomicauto.biz mention you saw this ad in WW and receive 10% off for your 1st visit!

The First Baptist Church

909 SW 11th Ave • Portland Saturday, March 9, 2013, 7:30pm Tickets are $20 in advance and available through www.kalakendra.org or may be purchased at the door for $25. Students and children $15

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AUTOS WANTED CASH FOR CARS: Any Car/Truck. Running or Not! Top Dollar Paid. We Come To You! Call For Instant Offer: 1-888-420-3808 www.cash4car.com (AAN CAN)

Steve Greenberg Tree Service

Willamette Writers SW 11th & Clay 7:00pm Tue 3/5 $10 www.willamettewriters.com

LESSONS CLASSICAL PIANO/ KEYBOARD

Theory Performance. All levels. Portland 503-227-6557 and 503-735-5953.

Pruning and removals, stump grinding. 24-hour emergency service. Licensed/ Insured. CCB#67024. Free estimates. 503-284-2077

PETS Skittles

MISCELLANEOUS 2ND PSALMS:

Why do the Heathen rage? And the People imagine a vain thing? The Kings of the earth set themselves and the Rulers take counsel together [conspiracy]; Against the Lord, and against HIS Anointed, saying: Let us break their bands [chains] as under and cast away their cords from us! BUT HE that sits in the Heavens shall LAUGH! The Lord shall have them in derision. Then HE shall speak to them in HIS sore displeasure... ...I will declare the decree: The Lord has said unto me - You are MY son [Daughter], for this Day have I begotten [adopted] you (Galatians 4:5-7). Now ASK OF ME, and I will give you the Heathen for your inheritance - and the uttermost parts of the world for your possession [dominion]. ... For the eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to show HIMSELF strong in the behalf of those whose heart is perfect to SEEK HIM! (2 Chronicles 16:9). THEREFORE, as I have said, says the Lord: ASK OF ME WHAT I SHOULD DO FOR YOU! (1 Kings 3:15 and Luke 18:41). Join US in prayer to the ONE TRUE GOD of Abraham, today, for the City of Portland. Chapel@gorge.net

Bernhard’s Professional MaintenanceComplete yard care, 20 years. 503-515-9803. Licensed and Insured.

TREE SERVICES

Science Fiction Author William Nolan (Logan’s Run)

Aloha, my name is Skittles and I am just as vibrant and sweet as my name! At 6 months old I am already a bonafide traveler having come all the way from Hawaii. Of course I loved the sunshine and the beaches, but I felt like my perfect home was here in the Pacific

ARIES (March 21-April 19): In 1993, Frenchman Emile Leray was on a solo trip through the Sahara Desert. In the middle of nowhere, his car suffered a major breakdown. It was unfixable. But he didn’t panic. Instead, he used a few basic tools he had on hand to dismantle the vehicle and convert its parts into a makeshift motorcycle. He was able to ride it back to civilization. I foresee the possibility of a metaphorically similar development in your future, Aries. You will get the opportunity to be very resourceful as you turn an apparent setback into a successful twist of fate. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Your power animal is not the soaring eagle or the shrewd wolf or the brave bear. No, Taurus, it’s the rubber chicken. I’m serious. With the rubber chicken as your guardian spirit, you might be inspired to commit random acts of goofiness and surrealism. And that would reduce tension in the people around you. It could motivate you to play jokes and pull harmless pranks that influence everyone to take themselves less seriously. Are you willing to risk losing your dignity if it helps make the general mood looser and more generous? Nothing could be better for group solidarity, which is crucial these days. (Thanks, Gina Williams.)

Presents

SAROD CONCERT

Week of February 28

BICYCLE SERVICES VICIOUS CYCLES

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Northwest where I can go hiking through the evergreen forests and drink locally brewed coffee (only decaffeinated though, they say I don’t need more energy!). I am happy go lucky, but am working on all of my manners so puppy classes are a must! I do great with other dogs and because of my energy would be best in a home with older kids. I am so excited to explore what this beautiful land has to offer, are you just the right person to be my travel guide? I will even carry my own water bottles and trail mix - no free loading here oh no sir! You ready to do this you great Portland people!? Then fill out an application at pixieproject.org so we can schedule a meet and greet! I am fixed, vaccinated and microchipped. My adoption fee is $220.

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CANCER (June 21-July 22): When I lived in Santa Cruz years ago, some of my published writings were illustrated by a local cartoonist named Karl Vidstrand. His work was funny, outrageous, and often offensive in the most entertaining ways. Eventually he wandered away from our colorful, creative community and moved to a small town at the edge of California’s Mojave Desert, near where the Space Shuttles landed. He liked living at the fringes of space, he told journalist R. D. Pickle. It gave him the sense of “being out of bounds at all times.” I suggest you adopt some of the Vidstrand spirit in the next three weeks, Cancerian. Being on the fringes and out of bounds are exactly where you belong. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): The history of your pain is entering a new phase. Gradually, almost imperceptibly at first, an emotional ache that has been sapping your vitality will begin to diminish. You will free yourself of its power to define you. You will learn to live without its oddly seductive glamour. More and more, as the weeks go by, you will find yourself less interested in it, less attracted to the maddening mystery it has foisted on you. No later than mid-April, I’m guessing that you will be ready to conduct a ritual of completion; you’ll be able to give it a formal send-off as you squeeze one last lesson out of it. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “When looking for a book, you may discover that you were in fact looking for the book next to it.” Italian writer Roberto Calasso told that to The Paris Review, and now I’m passing it on to you. But I’d like you to expand upon its meaning, and regard it as a metaphor that applies to your whole life right now. Every time you go searching for a specific something -- a learning experience, an invigorating pleasure, a helpful influence -- consider the possibility that what you really want and need is a different one that’s nearby. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): At least once a day, a cell in your body mutates in a way that makes it potentially cancerous. Just as often, your immune system hunts down that dangerous cell and kills it, preserving your health. Do you understand how amazing this is? You have a vigilant protector that’s always on duty, operating below the level of your awareness. What if I told you that this physical aspect of your organism has an equivalent psychic component? What if, in other

words, you have within you a higher intelligence whose function it is to steer you away from useless trouble and dumb risks? I say there is such a thing. I say this other protector works best if you maintain a conscious relationship with it, asking it to guide you and instruct you. The coming weeks will be an excellent time to deepen your connection. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Some rules in the game of life don’t apply to you and can therefore be safely ignored. Do you know which ones they are? On the other hand, do you understand which of the rules in the game of life are crucial to observe if you want to translate your fondest dreams into real experiences? To recognize the difference is a high art. I’m thinking that now would be an excellent time to solidify your mastery of this distinction. I suggest that you formally renounce your investment in the irrelevant rules and polish your skills at playing by the applicable rules. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “Don’t think the garden loses its ecstasy in winter,” wrote the Persian mystic poet Rumi. “It’s quiet, but the roots are down there riotous.” I think you’re like that winter garden right now, Sagittarius. Outwardly, there’s not much heat and flash. Bright ideas and strong opinions are not pouring out of you at their usual rates. You’re not even prone to talking too loud or accidentally knocking things over. This may in fact be as close as you can get to being a wallflower. And yet deep beneath the surface, out of sight from casual observers, you are charging up your psychic battery. The action down there is vibrant and vigorous. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): “When you come right down to it,” says religion writer Rabbi Marc Gellman, “there are only four basic prayers. Gimme! Thanks! Oops! and Wow!” Personally, I would add a fifth type of prayer to Gellman’s list: “Do you need any assistance?” The Creator always needs collaborators to help implement the gritty details of the latest divine schemes. According to my analysis of the astrological omens, you would be an excellent choice to volunteer for that role right now -- especially in tasks that involve blending beautiful fragments, healing sad schisms, furthering peace negotiations, and overcoming seemingly irreconcilable differences. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In the movie Fight Club, there is an animated scene at the very end that required an inordinate amount of time to produce. Each frame in this scene took the editors eight hours to process. Since there are 24 frames in each second, their work went on for three weeks. That’s the kind of attention to detail I recommend you summon as you devote yourself to your labor of love in the coming days, Aquarius. I think you know which specific parts of your creation need such intense focus. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “I have decided to rename the constellations that have domineered our skies too long,” writes an Internet denizen named Hasheeshee St. Frank. He gives only one example. The Big Dipper, he says, shall forevermore be known as The Star-Spangled Gas Can. I invite you to come up with additional substitutes, Pisces. It’s an excellent time for you to reshape and redefine the high and mighty things to which you have given away too much of your power. It’s a perfect moment to reconfigure your relationship with impersonal, overarching forces that have wielded a disproportionately large influence over your thoughts and feelings. How about if you call the constellation Orion by the new title of Three-Eyed Orangutan? Or instead of Pegasus, use the name Sexy Dolphin? Other ideas?

Homework What would the people who love you best say is the most important thing for you to learn? Testify at Freewillastrology.com.

check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes & Daily Text Message Horoscopes

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JONESIN’ by Matt Jones 70 *Movie with the line “It’s such a ﬁne line between stupid and clever” 71 Make into law 72 Sea birds 73 Mumford & ___ Down 1 Kingly 2 “___ ear and out the other” 3 Dull 4 Leb. neighbor 5 ___ vez (“again,” in Spanish) 6 Handy 7 Series set in Las Vegas 8 Lab heaters 9 “Twilight” characters 10 ___ Mae Brown (Whoopi Goldberg’s “Ghost” role) 11 “Dinosaur Hunter” in a Nintendo series 12 Former Secretary of State Root 13 Broadway show with trash can lids 15 Comedian Bud 22 “The Fifth Beatle” Sutcliﬀe 25 Start seeing a shrink 26 Comparison 27 Military school, with “The” 29 Tilling tool 30 Writer Sholem 32 ___ alai 33 It usually starts with www. 34 Chem., e.g. 35 Small ship 37 “Girls” network 38 Peyton’s brother 39 No longer working:

abbr. 42 Airline until 2001 45 Bridget Jones or Samuel Pepys 47 List of mistakes 49 Paid athlete 51 Power 52 Actor Zac 53 Florida city 54 Enzyme that breaks down genetic material

56 One of the Muses 57 “Cosmos” author Carl 58 Front porch attachment 61 Quarter, say 62 Painful plays on words 65 Japanese computer company 67 “This American Life” network 68 “Treasure Island” monogram

last week’s answers

Across 1 Smoky entree 5 It may be enough 9 Picks a candidate 14 *Phrase once heard before a long beep 16 What “X” may mean 17 *Part of a memorable anti-drug commercial 18 He jumps on turtles frequently 19 Former Texas Governor Richards 20 Karaoke joint, usually 21 Viper relative 23 Unit of resistance 24 Fire, euphemistically 26 *Cliche line from bank robbers 28 Furniture maker ___ Allen 31 Mentalist Geller 32 *Short poem by William Carlos Williams 36 Cyberspace 40 St. Louis attraction 41 Brilliance 43 Up to the task 44 “But you told me that...” retort 46 *1995 hit for Montell Jordan 48 Backtalk 50 Windshield problem 51 *Game show intro 55 Like Boston accents, as it were 59 Fight club? 60 Howard in the director’s chair 61 Number cruncher 63 Snitch 64 Tabriz resident 66 *Digniﬁed (but angry) complaint 69 Kenneth and Ashley

“What Is This?”–you tell me.

©2012 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com) For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle #JONZ612.

Located Downtown

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BEDTIME

4 cabins & 12 rooms on 80 acres 90 miles NE of Portland Dog Friendly Groups & individual travelers welcome!

TWINS

MATTRESS

COMPANY

FULL $ 89

QUEEN

(503)

760-1598

CALL TO LIST YOUR PROPRTY

www.mt-adams.com 509-364-3488

109

503-445-3647 or 503-445-2757

7353 SE 92nd Ave Mon-Fri 9-5, Sat 10-2

Custom Sizes » Made To Order Financing Available

“you squandered everything I gave you”

wweekdotcom

by Mrrranda L. Tarrow $285 Showing at

Tilde 7919 SE 13th Ave., Portland www.tildeshop.com/

SELL YOUR STUFF

GET WELL

GO TO THE BEACH R E N T YO U R HOUSE

S E RV I C E THE MASSES

space sponsored by

Submit your art to be featured in Willamette Week’s I Made This. For submission guidelines go to wweek.com/imadethis

FILL A JOB Adopt a Pet!!!

S h o w O f f Yo u r A r t

CLASSIFIEDS

503.445.2757 • 503.445.3647 WillametteWeek Classifieds FEBRUARY 27, 2013 wweek.com

BACK COVER

TO ADVERTISE ON WILLAMETTE WEEK’S BACK COVER CALL 445-1170 Bankruptcy Attorney Mary Jane’s $$CASH FOR CARS$$ It’s not too late to eliminate debt, protect House of Glass assets, start over. Experienced, Today!! Glass Pipes, Vaporizers, Incense, Candles. compassionate, top-quality service. Christopher Kane, 503-380-7822 www.ckanelaw.com

AA HYDROPONICS

9966 SW Arctic Drive, Beaverton 9220 SE Stark Street, Portland American Agriculture • americanag.com PDX 503-256-2400 BVT 503-641-3500

Dead or Alive We haul away! Ron 503-758-3050 rsyoc@comcast.net

10% discount for new OMA Card holders! 1425 NW 23rd, Ptld. 503-841-5751 7219 NE Hwy 99, Vanc. 360-735-5913

MEDICAL MARIJUANA

Our nonprofit clinic’s doctors will help. The Hemp & Cannabis Foundation. www.thc-foundation.org 503-281-5100

SEE MORE INSIDE

BACK COVER CONTINUED

ACTING CLASSES

TAUGHT/FILMED by L.A. Actor/Director/Producer JESSE VINT. Now Enrolling. www.JesseVint.com for free audit. 360-609-2200

Area 69

7720 SE 82nd Ave Adult Movies, Video Arcade and PIPES! Opiate and pain killer Kratom Pills 503-774-5544

ATTORNEYBANKRUPTCY

Get a Fresh Start this New Year! FREE Consultation! Payment Plans. Call 503-808-9032 Attorney Scott Hutchinson www.Hutchinson-Law.com

$BUYING JUNK CARS$ $100-$2000 no title required ,free removal call Jeff 503-501-0711 jms300zx@yahoo.com

A FEMALE FRIENDLY SEX TOY BOUTIQUE

THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO PROSTATE PLEASURE / THURS, FEB 28TH – 7:30 - $20 TEASE A PEEL: CLASSIC BURLESQUE PEELING TECHNIQUES / WED, MAR 6TH – 7:15 - $15 EXPANDING YOUR BDSM EXPERIENCES / WED, MAR 13TH – 7:30 - $20 FEMALE EJACULATION & THE G-SPOT W/ DEBORAH SUNDAHL / THURS, APRIL 11TH – 7:30 - $25 BEYOND MONOGAMY / THUR, APRIL 18TH – 7:30 - $20 SHEBOPTHESHOP.COM 909 N BEECH STREET, HISTORIC MISSISSIPPI DISTRICT 503-473-8018 SU-TH 11–7, FR–SA 11–8

FEELING TRIBAL? COME JOIN US POLYAMORY CIRCLE CALL LAURY 503-285-4848

We Buy, Sell, & Trade New & Used Hydroponic Equipment. 503-747-3624

Oregon Wage Claim Attorneys

Helping Oregon employees collect wages! Free consultation! Schuck Law (503) 974-6142 (360) 566-9243 http://wageclaim.org

Guitar Lessons

Personalized instruction for over 15yrs. www.danielnoland.com 503-546-3137

20% Off Any Smoking Apparatus With This Ad! BUY LOCAL, BUY AMERICAN, BUY MARY JANES

HOT GAY LOCALS

Glass Pipes, Vaporizers, Incense & Candles

Send Messages FREE! 503-299-9911 Use FREE Code 5974, 18+

7219 NE Hwy. 99, Suite 109 Vancouver, WA 98665

Improvisation Classes Now enrolling. Beginners Welcome! Brody Theater 503-224-2227 www.brodytheater.com

North West Hydroponic R&R

(360) 735-5913 212 N.E. 164th #19 Vancouver, WA 98684

JiuJitsu

(360) 514-8494

Ground defense under black belt instruction. www.nwfighting.com or 503-740-2666

6913 E. Fourth Plain Vancouver, WA 98661

8312 E. Mill Plain Blvd Vancouver, WA 98664

OMMP Card Holders Only www.ommpexpress.com Delivery 503-915-0023

WWEEKDOTCOM

(360) 213-1011

1156 Commerce Ave Longview Wa 98632

(360) 695-7773 (360) 577-4204 Not valid with any other offer

Oregon Medical Marijuana

Learn To Relax

5 week intro to Tai Chi starts March 3 Sundays 9:30 AM selfdiscoveryseminars.com/taichi 503 234-7016

1425 NW 23rd Portland, OR 97210 (503) 841-5751

1825 E Street

Washougal, WA 98671

(360) 844-5779

Opiate Treatment Program

Evening outpatient treatment program with suboxone. CRCHealth/Dr. Jim Thayer, Addiction Medicine www.belmont.crchealth.com 503-505-4979

Oregon Workers’ Compensation Attorney Free consultation G. Shields 503-274-1603 Portland-Workers-Comp-Lawyer.com

REVIVED CELLULAR Sell us your Old Smartphone Or Cellphones Today! Buy/Sell/Repair. 7816 N. Interstate 503-286-1527 www.revivedcellular.com

The Historic WONDER BALLROOM A Wonderful Place For Your Event featuring the Downstairs Gallery Bar an intimate space accommodating 150 along with the main floor ballroom for up to 800 miket@wonderballroom.com • 503-284-8686 wonderballroom.com

$Cash for Junk Vehicles$

Ask for Steve. 503-936-5923 Licensed/Bonded/Insured

POPPI’S PIPES

PIPES, SCALES, SHISHA, GRINDERS, KRATOM, VAPORIZERS, HOOKAHS, DETOX, ETC. 1712 E. Burnside 503-206-7731 3619 SE Division 971-229-1760 OPEN: Mon.-Sat.10am-9pm www.poppispipes.com

Qigong Classes

Cultivate health and energy www.nwfighting.com or 503-740-2666

FIND MORE ONLINE: WWEEK.COM

WWEEKDOTCOM

MEDICAL MARIJUANA

Card Services Clinic HOT DOGS • FRIES • FULL BAR

New Downtown Location! 1501 SW Broadway www.mellowmood.com

4119 SE Hawthorne, Portland ph: 503-235-PIPE (7473)

503-384-WEED (9333) www.mmcsclinic.com

4911 NE Sandy Blvd, Portland

open noon until 3am EvErYdaY www.zachsshack.com 4611 SE HawtHornE Blvd • Portland, or