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WILLAMETTE WEEK PORTLAND’S NEWSWEEKLY

“WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO THE LOG LADY?” P. 42 WWEEK.COM

VOL 40/10 01.08.2014

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I L L U S T R A T I O N B Y K E N N E T H H U E Y, P H O T O B Y W W S T A F F.

NEWS THE FIRST LADY’S PARKING PASS. DRANK HEATER ALLEN’S ISARWEIZEN. MUSIC PATTERSON HOOD’S PDX DRIVE-BY.

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

JEREK HOLLENDER

CONTENT

DINNER AND DANCING: Black Cauldron is Portlandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s second vegan strip club. Page 23.

NEWS

MUSIC

LEAD STORY

PERFORMANCE 36

CULTURE

MOVIES

FOOD & DRINK

CLASSIFIEDS

STAFF Editor-in-Chief Mark Zusman EDITORIAL Managing Editor for News Brent Walth Arts & Culture Editor Martin Cizmar Staff Writers Nigel Jaquiss, Aaron Mesh Copy Chief Rob Fernas Copy Editors Matt Buckingham, Jessica Pedrosa Stage & Screen Editor Rebecca Jacobson Music Editor Matthew Singer Projects Editor Matthew Korfhage Books Penelope Bass Dance Aaron Spencer Theater Rebecca Jacobson Visual Arts Richard Speer Editorial Interns Ramona DeNies, Ravleen Kaur, Lyla Rowen, Alex Tomchak Scott, Savannah Wasserman

CONTRIBUTORS Emilee Booher, Ruth Brown, Nathan Carson, Rachel Graham Cody, Pete Cottell, Jordan Green, Jay Horton, AP Kryza, Nina Lary, Mitch Lillie, John Locanthi, Enid Spitz, Grace Stainback, Mark Stock, Michael C. Zusman PRODUCTION Production Manager Ben Kubany Art Director Kathleen Marie Graphic Designers Mitch Lillie, Amy Martin, Xel Moore, Dylan Serkin Production Interns Emma Browne ADVERTISING Director of Advertising Scott Wagner Display Account Executives Maria Boyer, Ginger Craft, Michael Donhowe, Kevin Friedman, Janet Norman, Kyle Owens, Sharri Miller Regan, Andrew Shenker Classifieds Account Executive Matt Plambeck Advertising Assistant Ashley Grether Marketing & Events Manager Steph Barnhart Give!Guide Director Nick Johnson

Our mission: Provide Portlanders with an independent and irreverent understanding of how their worlds work so they can make a difference. Though Willamette Week is free, please take just one copy. Anyone removing papers in bulk from our distribution points will be prosecuted, as they say, to the full extent of the law. Willamette Week is published weekly by City of Roses Newspaper Company 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Main line phone: (503) 243-2122 fax: (503) 243-1115 Classifieds phone: (503) 223-1500 fax: (503) 223-0388

DISTRIBUTION Circulation Director Mark Kirchmeier WWEEK.COM Web Production Brian Panganiban Web Editor Matthew Korfhage MUSICFESTNW Executive Director Trevor Solomon Associate Director Matt Manza OPERATIONS Accounting Manager Chris Petryszak Credit & Collections Shawn Wolf Office Manager/Receptionist Sam Cusumano A/P Clerk Andrea Iannone Manager of Information Systems Brian Panganiban Associate Publisher Jane Smith Publisher Richard H. Meeker

Willamette Week welcomes freelance submissions. Send material to either News Editor or Arts Editor. Manuscripts will be returned if you include a self-addressed, stamped envelope. To be considered for calendar listings, notice of events must be received in writing by noon Wednesday, two weeks before publication. Send to Calendar Editor. Photographs should be clearly labeled and will be returned if accompanied by a selfaddressed, stamped envelope. Questions concerning circulation or subscription inquiries should be directed to Mark Kirchmeier at Willamette Week. Postmaster: Send all address changes to Willamette Week, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Subscription rates: One year $100, six months $50. Back issues $5 for walk-ins, $8 for mailed requests when available. Willamette Week is mailed at third-class rates. A.A.N. Association of ALTERNATIVE NEWSWEEKLIES This newspaper is published on recycled newsprint using soy-based ink.

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

Dentistry In The Pearl That’s Something To Smile About!

New Patient $74 Exam and X-rays Dr. Viseh Sundberg

New Patient $49 Basic Cleaning

(exam required)

Children’s $59 Exam & Cleaning

(new patients age 12 and under)

Professional $99 Home Whitening

(exam required)

(503) 546-9079 222 NW 10th Avenue www.sundbergdentistry.com

INBOX WOLVES IN THE NORTHWEST

URBAN BEACHES ON WILLAMETTE

I think this is awesome [“Voices: Wolves May Soon Be in the 503 Area Code,” WW, Jan. 1, 2014]. I live in Washington, where the wolf numbers have been rising in recent years. I still haven’t seen or heard one, but they are so shy, that is to be expected. I only hope Washington and Oregon do a better job of managing these animals than Idaho, Montana and Wyoming. —“Michelle Bradbury”

Anything that gets people on the Willamette River is good, whether it is in canoes, rowing shells, kayaks, rowboats or other human-powered craft [“Voices: Bring Urban Beaches to the Willamette,” WW, Jan. 1, 2014]. Swimming is great too—for the couple of months a year when it is typically most attractive on the lower Willamette. Multiple organizations and people have worked for years to increase access, and good progress has been made. But we need to be smart about what we build for access. The Tom McCall Bowl, for example, has also been identified as a good place for habitat restoration. It is also important to remember the kind of river we have downtown—it is a big, silty river that stays high typically well into summer. It is a fantastic river for recreation on many levels, but does come with some constraints. Lastly, lets continue to put some real focus on Portland Harbor and the cleanup of the 10-mile Superfund site. 2014 will bring some major decisions with the cleanup plan being developed. This will provide a road map for how to best deal with the vast stretches of contaminated sediment that exist just downstream of downtown. It is a huge project that is directly related to community health and well-being. Travis Williams Willamette Riverkeeper

Why would any sane person want to introduce predators that attack people, pets (your dog!) and livestock? What is the point, other than following some wildlands (get-rid-of-man) scheme? —“David Clark” Let the wolves come home. There has been enough killing. —“Christine Poppolardo Marcyk”

OREGON’S HISTORY OF SLAVERY

The slavery thing may be a new revelation for most people—I certainly was not aware of it until very recently [“Voices: Oregon Was Once a Slave State,” WW, Jan. 1, 2014]. The exclusion laws and redlining to follow should at least be common knowledge, though. —“Damos Abadon” Hopefully, learning about the past will make the future better. No one can undo the wrongs done before us, but everyone can certainly make those who were once unwelcome feel they are now welcome here. —“amandameezer”

I’m losing my faith in humanity. Why do people think it is OK to have food delivered and then not tip? Do they just not know they should? —A Lovable Misanthrope Oh, Lovable—I’ve been waiting four years for someone to ask this question. Thank God for your slightly klutzy phraseology, or people might think I wrote it myself. (For the record, I didn’t.) I’ve alluded to having worked in restaurants in the past, but until now I’ve glossed over the fact that I still work in one. But I do, and I’m not ashamed! These days, lots of your favorite writers (not that that has anything to do with me) do the same. I’m coming out of the mop closet to prove that any pizza slave can grow up to be a famous features writer. Yay! (Unfortunately, most famous features writers will still have to deliver pizza to make a living. Boo!) Like you, I find it difficult to believe there’s 4

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR must include the author’s street address and phone number for veriﬁcation. Letters must be 250 or fewer words. Submit to: 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Fax: (503) 243-1115. Email: mzusman@wweek.com.

anyone who doesn’t know you’re supposed to tip the delivery person. People I meet socially often do seem genuinely confused as to how much they should tip, though. From here on out, they won’t have that excuse. The easy answer is $5. The more nuanced answer is that about 85 percent of customers will throw down $3, $4 or $5. If you tip more—or less—the driver will remember you. Precisely how you’ll be remembered is entirely up to you. (If your order is over $50, adjust these figures upward.) Remember, the pizza-delivering community is rife with creative folks—writers, musicians, pornographers—who’ve been put out of business by the Internet, so when you show largesse to these grease-stained wretches, you’re not just being polite, you’re supporting the arts. Good tippers of the world, unite! You have nothing to lose but your change! QUESTIONS? Send them to dr.know@wweek.com

GIVE!GUIDE RESULTS TO OUR READERS: Here at Give!Guide Central, our annual effort to raise funds for local nonprofits coincides with the dropping of the New Year’s Eve ball. At the stroke of midnight, we shut off the website’s Donate button, and those of us who work with this crazy project step back in sheer awe and amazement at your generosity. This past November and December, 7,427 of you contributed $2,453,083 to the betterment of our community. You did so without any sort of public recognition but with a public spirit that serves as fuel for this annual effort. To get a sense of how generous you are, I did a quick comparison with the gold standard of our industry—The New York Times, which, for the past 101 years, has conducted its own annual giving campaign. The Times is America’s most influential newspaper, and its readers are wealthier than the average Portlander. Yet, factoring in total readership and amounts donated, you’re at least 10 times more generous. G!G’s primary goal—to get Portlanders 35 and under into the habit of charitable

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GIVE! GUIDE 2013

giving—has also been wildly successful. This year, 2,065 of you are under 35—twice as many as last year. Your generosity has moved this into a whole new dimension. All 7,427 of you are just plain amazing. And good. And giving. And we can’t thank you enough. We call Willamette Week’s Give!Guide an experiment that engages print and social media, Portland businesses and our incredible nonprofit community in a common purpose.

GREAT BUSINESS PARTNERS PLEASE PATRONIZE THEM

Quad Graphics Rogue Distillery Rose City Mortgage

Adidas

Ken’s Artisan Bakery

Salt & Straw

A to Z Wineworks

Kiehl’s

Scout Books

Bank of America

Kind

The Standard

Bike Gallery

Leftbank Annex

Steven Smith Teamaker

Bob’s Red Mill

McMenamins

Stumptown Coﬀee Roasters

Chinook Book

Morel Ink

Tender Loving Empire

Comcast

New Seasons Market

Communion

Oregon Community Foundation

Thompson Kessler Wiest & Borquist

Davis Wright Tremaine

Oregon Public House

Two Tarts

Egg Press Collection

Pedal Bike Tours

Umpqua Bank

Fashion Buddha

¿Por Qué No? Taqueria

United Way

IKEA

Washman Car Wash

Intel

Portland Center for the Media Arts

Grady Britton

Portland Center Stage

Widmer Brothers Brewing

Whole Foods Market

It really does take a large village to pull this off. Creative agency Grady Britton did incredible work to give us a new website. Great local companies (like Bob’s Red Mill, Stumptown Coffee Roasters, Widmer Brothers Brewing and A to Z Wineworks) helped with incentives. The folks at Leftbank Annex hosted a splendid kickoff party in early November, and Morel Ink donated thousands of great grocery bags and lawn signs. Po r t l a n d C e n t e r for the Media Arts produced compelling videos. We also want to thank and a c k n ow l e d g e t h e remarkable Skidmore Prize winners, all our wonderful corporate sponsors and the thousands of incredible Portlanders who work at this year’s 129 participating nonprofits. Special props to G!G executive director Nick Johnson, intern Katie Mundal and designer Amy Martin. A project like this engenders many good stories. One is the incredible spirit of cooperation that existed this year among participating nonprofits. On Dec. 1, for example, A-WOL Dance Collective, Polaris Dance Theatre and the Circus Project teamed up to produce a wonderful evening of dance and aerial work, all as part of showcasing their participation in this year’s G!G. I heard another from a Portland family as midnight approached on Dec. 31. Their two children, both now in high school, save some of the money they earn during the year. Then, on New Year’s Eve, they get together with their parents to make Give!Guide contributions. The parents match their children’s gifts.

A couple of interesting statistics from the 2013 G!G: • For all 10 years of G!G’s history, Northeast Portland gave the most, but was nearly caught this year by Southeast. • This year’s goal was $2.1 million. You reached it at 12:06 pm on Dec. 31—and in the next 11 hours and 54 minutes, you gave $300,000 more—to set a G!G record. • You gave $243,740 to the Oregon Cultural Trust. Oregon Food Bank was second with $128,622. Equally impressive was your support for smaller, lesserknown nonprofits. (For those of you who relish such statistics, there are 10-YEAR TOTAL: $9,780,040 more to be found at giveguide.org.) G!G and the Skidmore Prize will return later this year, starting with applications and nominations this summer. (WW and wweek. com will carry announcements.) In the meantime, we are thrilled by your participation. We say WW’s purpose is to make Portland a better place in which to live, work and play. Now, we may need to amend that—to making Portland a better place to live, work, play and give. Thank you again for putting real, heartfelt substance behind the words we so honor on the Skidmore Fountain in Old Town: “Good citizens are the riches of a city.”

PUBLISHER PS: The next two issues of WW will contain our third annual Volunteer Guide. It’s our way to help you give something other than money—a little of your sweat equity— to local nonprofits. See if there’s something that interests you, and tell your friends.

RESULTS, BY PARTICIPATING NONPROFIT 1000 Friends of Oregon ...................................$17,329

The Forest Park Conservancy ......................... $27,110

Live Wire Radio .......................................................$7,855

PDX Pop Now! ........................................................$8,657

Sexual Assault Resource Center (SARC)..$6,800

A-WOL Dance Collective................................... $1,490

Friends of Family Farmers ...............................$6,040

Living Yoga...............................................................$4,356

The Pixie Project .................................................$24,645

The Shadow Project........................................... $20,631

AC Portland................................................................$8,011

Friends of Outdoor School..............................$15,677

Macdonald Center.................................................$6,552

Planned Parenthood Columbia Willamette..$103,751

Sisters Of The Road ........................................... $66,318

Adelante Mujeres................................................... $6,782

Friends of the Children - Portland ..............$13,603

Meals on Wheels People.................................. $37,673

PlayWrite, Inc. .........................................................$3,620

SMART (Start Making A Reader Today) ..$18,300

Audubon Society of Portland .......................$24,104

Friends of the Columbia Gorge....................$43,510

Mercy Corps Northwest and Action Ctr .. $66,571

Polaris Dance Theatre .........................................$5,025

SOLVE ..........................................................................$5,164

Basic Rights Education Fund ........................$15,449

Friends of Trees ....................................................$23,312

Miracle Theatre Group ........................................$3,547

The Pongo Fund Pet Food Bank .................. $112,110

Street Roots ..........................................................$22,964

Bicycle Transportation Alliance ................... $46,377

Girls Inc. of NW Oregon.....................................$6,898

Momentum Alliance ..............................................$3,619

Portland After-School Tennis & Education$2,445

Sunshine Division, Inc.........................................$18,777

Bradley Angle.........................................................$12,395

Girls on the Run Portland Metro .................... $3,525

Morrison Child and Family Services ..............$5,710

Portland Children’s Museum ............................$3,520

Tavern Books ...........................................................$2,295

CASA for Children of Multnomah and ....................... Washington Counties ........................................ $12,445

Growing Gardens ................................................$27,224

Museum of Contemporary Craft ....................$9,570

Portland Fruit Tree Project ..............................$18,235

TransActive Education & Advocacy .............. $2,671

Habitat for Humanity Portland/Metro East..$57,530

My Voice Music.......................................................$5,487

Portland Gay Men’s Chorus .............................$5,600

Transition Projects ................................................$15,615

Cat Adoption Team ........................................... $52,334

Hacienda CDC.........................................................$8,656

Neighborhood House ......................................... $30,141

Portland Homeless Family Solutions ..........$14,875

The Tucker-Maxon School............................... $12,065

Central City Concern ...........................................$20,131

Hand2Mouth Theatre............................................$1,544

North by Northeast Community Health Ctr .$33,003

The Portland Kitchen...........................................$6,655

Urban Farm Collective ........................................$4,987

The Children’s Book Bank ............................... $19,507

Harper’s Playground .......................................... $10,879

Northeast Emergency Food Program.........$13,271

Portland Lesbian Choir ........................................$1,503

Urban Gleaners.....................................................$14,366

The Circus Project...............................................$10,820

Hells Canyon Preservation Council .............. $11,056

Northwest Children’s Theater & School ....$6,060

Portland Tool Libraries........................................ $5,010

Vibe of Portland ..................................................... $5,877

Classroom Law Project.................................... $14,600

Hoyt Arboretum Friends ..................................$11,430

Northwest Classical Theatre Company ......$2,507

Portland Women’s Crisis Line (PWCL) ......$12,475

Virginia Garcia Memorial Foundation / Health Ctr.$11,182

CoHo Productions................................................ $4,580

Human Access Project....................................... $4,350

Northwest Documentary ................................... $3,352

Portland YouthBuilders......................................$18,735

Voz Workers’ Rights Education Project .....$3,905

Columbia Riverkeeper..........................................$6,081

Human Solutions ..................................................$12,355

Northwest Mothers Milk Bank ......................... $9,525

Potluck in the Park ...............................................$8,895

Wallace Medical Concern ...............................$27,900

Community Cycling Center ............................$48,431

I Have a Dream Oregon .....................................$16,138

Opal Creek Ancient Forest Center ............. $12,202

Project Access NOW ............................................$11,451

West Women’s and Children’s Shelter .........$11,541

Community Warehouse ................................... $21,485

Impact NW .............................................................. $13,910

Operation Nightwatch .........................................$11,165

Project POOCH, Inc............................................$19,903

Willamette Riverkeeper......................................$8,428

The Dental Foundation of Oregon ................$11,513

Independent Publishing Resource Center ..$24,281

Oregon Cultural Trust.....................................$243,740

Q Center ....................................................................$5,286

Wordstock ...............................................................$6,940

Depave .......................................................................$13,321

The Jeremy Wilson Foundation .....................$9,465

Oregon Food Bank...........................................$128,622

Raphael House of Portland ............................$16,450

Write Around Portland .....................................$14,364

The Dougy Center ................................................ $8,875

JOIN .......................................................................... $39,823

Oregon Humane Society ..................................$45,751

ReFIT: Remodeling for Independence Together . $2,107

Youth, Rights & Justice........................................ $5,166

Family Dogs New Life Shelter.......................$14,850

Know Your City ..................................................... $2,490

Oregon Museum of Science and Industry ..$5,900

Returning Veterans Project ...............................$11,318

Zenger Farm ............................................................$5,946

Farmers Ending Hunger..................................... $7,520

Latino Network.......................................................$2,520

Oregon Tradeswomen Inc................................ $11,665

Ride Connection ....................................................$3,290

Farmers Market Fund ...........................................$6,471

Lettuce Grow: Prison Food Garden Project..$8,538

Oregon Wild .........................................................$20,846

The Right Brain Initiative ................................. $14,287

FearNoMusic........................................................... $4,305

The Library Foundation...................................$32,480

p:ear ...........................................................................$28,910

Rock ‘n’ Roll Camp for Girls .............................$9,495

Feral Cat Coalition of Oregon ...................... $42,677

Literary Arts ............................................................$16,972

PAW (Portland Animal Welfare) Team ..... $18,679

Schoolhouse Supplies .......................................$12,060

Total.....................................$2,453,083

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

POLITICS: What 2013 donations tell us about 2014 races. CITY: You pay to park. Oregon’s First Lady doesn’t. HOTSEAT: Trail Blazers center Robin Lopez. COVER STORY: What happened to Dave of Killer Bread fame?

VOTED

BEST DOGGIE DAYCARE

BY WW READERS

2410 SE 50th Avenue 503.238.0737 7am-7pm weekdays 8am-5pm weekends

NEWS WITH MANY RIVERS TO CROSS. What a diff erence a decade makes. Ten years ago, when he ran for mayor, Jim Francesconi outraised his opponent, Tom Potter, by more than a 4-to-1 margin. In this year’s race for Multnomah County chair, however, former County Commissioner Deborah Kafoury KAFOURY has so far raised twice as much as Francesconi. Kafoury’s $97,000 raised to date includes checks from numerous donors who supported Francesconi in 2004, including businessman Junki Yoshida ($3,000) and developers John Russell ($2,500) and Al Solheim ($1,000). County Chairwoman Marissa Madrigal was appointed to the position after the previous chair, Jeff Cogen, resigned following his admission of an affair with a county employee. N I C K PAT TO N

Dog Daycare • Boarding • Behavioral Counseling

MUSIC PG. 25

7 9 10 12

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

Proponents of the proposed Columbia River Crossing will try to exhume the multibillion-dollar project at a pre-session legislative hearing Jan. 14. Oregon has pushed forward with the Interstate 5 Bridge and widening project despite Washington state’s rejection of the CRC last year. The Oregon Legislature’s initial $450 million authorization for the CRC has since expired. Lawmakers would do well to read a new report from Portland economist Joe Cortright before that hearing. The report, available at wweek.com, details the error-filled tolling-revenue projections compiled by CDM Smith, the consulting firm Gov. John Kitzhaber is relying on for the project. “In several cases, including toll roads in California, Texas and Virginia,” says Cortright, who’s consulting for CRC opponent Plaid Pantry, “CDM Smith has prepared estimates that were so wildly optimistic that the projects have been forced into bankruptcy or financial reorganization.” Portland water offi cials are still mopping up former City Commissioner Randy Leonard’s messes. Commissioner Nick Fish tells WW that as soon as he was given the Water Bureau to oversee, he gave his staff an order: “Sell the goddamned Water House.” It has, at a huge loss. On Jan. 4, the city unloaded that controversial building—a water-effi cient demonstration home on Northeast 140th Avenue that cost utility ratepayers roughly $940,000. The buyers, Portland couple Claudio and Kayla Vasquez, agreed to pay $394,500 (down from the city’s original $475,000 asking price). Meanwhile, the city is also ending its copyright-infringement lawsuit over the Portland Loo, which was patented by Leonard. Last year, Portland sued Roseburg company Romtec Inc. for selling a look-alike outdoor toilet. Federal court documents show the lawsuit is being settled. “We’ve agreed to terms,” says Fish staffer Jim Blackwood, “but we don’t have the fi nal agreement.” Read more Murmurs and daily scuttlebutt.

M U LT N O M A H C O U N T Y

W W W. WA G P O RT L A N D . C O M

Celebrating 10 years of caring for your dog!

GOT A GOOD TIP? CALL 503.445.1542, OR EMAIL NEWSHOUND@WWEEK.COM

m at t h e w b i l l i n g to n

NEWS

THE CAMPAIGN WHISPERERS HINTS OF OREGON’S POLITICAL FUTURE IN 2014 CAN BE SEEN IN THE CONTRIBUTIONS OF 2013.

says Portland pollster Adam Davis. “I think we’re likely to see a lot more support this time.”

It’s 2014, an election year that will bring before voters an astonishingly broad list of ballot measures, a race for the U.S. Senate and an Oregon governor seeking an unprecedented fourth term. But clues to the key turning points in this year’s races may already be out there in the reports of cash contributed to political races before the close of 2013. We’ve highlighted five key political contributions below—not necessarily because they were the biggest checks written in 2013, but because they may showcase the direction political power is already moving.

2. The contribution: $100,000 from the Northwest Grocery Association on Dec. 18 to five political action committees called Oregonians for Competition that seek to privatize the sale of liquor in Oregon. Why it matters: Since the end of Prohibition in 1933, the Oregon Liquor Control Commission has tightly regulated booze sales in this state. After busting a similar state monopoly in Washington in 2011, the grocers are itching for a fight here—or a legislative compromise. Privatization has not led to lower prices in Washington (“Price Check on Fireball,” WW, Dec. 25, 2013), but Reed College political science professor Paul Gronke says voters’ distrust of government works in the grocers’ favor. “State-controlled liquor has gone the way of the dodo,” Gronke says. “We’re behind the times.”

1. The contribution: $50,000 from the Drug Policy Alliance of New York City to New Approach Oregon, a marijuana legalization group, on Sept. 23. Why it matters: An underfunded, haphazard marijuana legalization measure garnered nearly 47 percent of the vote in 2012. This time, the national funders—notably, hedge-fund billionaire George Soros—who helped the Drug Policy Alliance pass legalization in Colorado and Washington have come to Oregon in a big way for 2014. The close 2012 finish in Oregon coupled with the kind of money Soros can unleash could swing the question this year. “This is an issue that cuts across demographic groups,”

3. The contribution: On Nov. 15, Nike contributed $280,000 to the Nike Equality Political Action Committee, which the sportswear company established to support a 2014 same-sex marriage initiative. Why it matters: In 2004, when Oregon voters overwhelmingly passed Measure 36, a constitutional ban on gay marriage by 57 to 43 percent, large corporations such as Nike sat out the election. Avoiding controversy is a top priority for companies that depend on retail sales. But Columbia Sportswear and Adidas beat Nike to the punch last year by backing a measure to end Oregon’s same-sex marriage ban. The creation of Nike’s PAC shows just how far public

By nig e l jaq ui ss

njaquiss@wweek.com

opinion has shifted—and the company’s spending gives corporate Oregon plenty of cover. “Publicly traded corporations have almost never weighed in on social issues,” says Phil Keisling, director of the Center for Public Service at Portland State University. “It’s been a Rubicon that has largely been uncrossed and may have ramifications beyond this election.” 4. The contribution: On Dec. 12, Roseburg Forest Products gave $25,000 to Gov. John Kitzhaber to help him win an unprecedented (in Oregon) fourth gubernatorial term. Why it matters: Most timber companies back Republicans. But Roseburg was one of six timber companies to ante up when Kitzhaber announced his re-election plans. Those contributions may reflect the timber industry’s satisfaction with what they see as Kitzhaber’s moderate forestry policy. Their giving also signals to announced GOP candidate Dennis Richardson, state representative from Central Point, that the timber companies think the Democratic governor cannot lose. “It sends a pretty serious message,” says Pacific University political science professor Jim Moore. “They see Kitzhaber as a really good bet.” 5. The contribution: On Dec. 30, the Umatilla Electric Cooperative gave another $6,000 to the Affordable Renewable Energy Political Action Committee, bringing its total to $25,000 for the year. Why it matters: Left-leaning Portlanders may think they set the state’s environmental policy, but Umatilla Electric, a tiny rural power co-op, wants to swing a huge bat against the state’s landmark 2007 renewable energy law. That law requires the utilities to generate 25 percent of their power from new renewable sources by 2025. Umatilla and its allies want existing dams to count toward that percentage, which would make the standard essentially meaningless. “It may be a pocketbook issue,” Keisling says. “Do voters want to save money or be environmental leaders?” Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

Willamette Week Date, 2008 wweek.com

PARKING VIOLATION OREGON’S FIRST LADY IS CITED FOR USING A STATE POLICE PASS TO PARK HER PERSONAL CAR. BY NIG E L JAQ UI SS

njaquiss@wweek.com

On Dec. 16, Mary Kisel, a city parking officer for the Portland Bureau of Transportation, was patrolling her beat, keeping an eye on the pre-holiday crush that jams downtown streets and fills up curbside parking spaces. A few minutes after noon, Kisel noticed a 2005 Toyota Prius parked on Southwest Salmon Street between Park and 10th avenues, just around the corner from the Portland Art Museum. The Prius didn’t have a $1.60-per-hour parking receipt in the curbside window, as city rules require. Digital photos taken by Kisel of the car and reviewed by WW show no receipt displayed anywhere on the vehicle. But the photos did capture something unusual—a laminated Oregon State Police parking pass about 5 by 8 inches on the Prius’ dashboard. That was unusual because the Prius was not a state police car, nor was it a government vehicle. Instead, it’s registered to Cylvia Hayes, Gov. John Kitzhaber’s longtime companion. (Although Hayes, 46, and Kitzhaber, 66, are not married, the governor’s office

and her state website refer to her as “First Lady Cylvia Hayes.”) Portland and other cities have for years battled the fraudulent use of disabled parking permits. It’s less common for a civilian to get dinged for using a police parking credential. City rules on such permits are clear. “Government parking permits are not intended to serve as substitutes for off-street parking or to make ordinary parking simply more convenient,” the Bureau of Transportation’s website says. “Permits are to be used to accomplish official government business that could not be accomplished without a special parking permit.” Hayes referred WW’s questions to Kitzhaber spokesman Ian Greenfield, who says Hayes was on official business that day, giving a lunchtime presentation on prosperity to 150 Christian business people and their spouses at the Arlington Club. The Oregon State Police provide protective services to the governor and his immediate family, including driving Kitzhaber and Hayes to events in state vehicles. Greenfield says Hayes had traveled with a state police bodyguard to the lunch but took her Prius because she had personal business later. He also says Hayes has had two parking passes since Kitzhaber entered office in 2011—one from the state police and one from the city of Portland. Greenfield says Hayes simply put the wrong one in her window. “It was a mistake,” he says. Even it she’d used her city permit, Hayes would be on thin ice, however. City rules say “permits are to be issued to government-owned vehicles.” Anyone else trying to do what Hayes did might have a bigger problem. Oregon law makes it a class C felony if “a person commits the crime of criminal impersonation of a peace officer if the person, with the intent to obtain a benefit or to

NEWS PETE ERICKSON

CITY

CYLVIA HAYES

injure or defraud another person, uses false law enforcement identification.” A retired career state prosecutor, speaking on background, says the law is typically applied only in cases in which perpetrators use a police badge or uniform to commit a more serious offense than skipping out on paying a city parking meter. For Portland parking officers, however, the only relevant question is whether a vehicle parked in a metered space displays a valid parking receipt. For Kisel, the parking patrol officer, the answer was simple. “The vehicle has no receipt,” Kisel wrote in the comments section of the $60 ticket she issued to Hayes. “Laminated card OR ST police. Not valid for parking.” Hayes has not yet paid the ticket. “OSP has contacted the city for guidance on what to do about the ticket,” Greenfield says. “If the city wants it paid, she’ll pay out of her personal account.”

p. 45 Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

SPORTS C H R I S R YA N P H O T O . C O M

NEWS

ROBIN LOPEZ THE BLAZERS’ CENTER TALKS COMIC BOOKS, THE GOONIES AND HIS LOVE OF ALMOST EVERYTHING DISNEY. BY M AT T H E W S I N G E R msinger@wweek .com

Robin Lopez is, literally and figuratively, a giant nerd. That’s normally an ill-advised thing to say about someone built like a Greek colossus, but the Blazers’ 7-foot, 255pound center wouldn’t take offense. How else to describe a guy who spends his NBA money on comic books, could dominate a Disney-themed pub quiz, customizes his game shoes with elaborate Sharpie illustrations, regularly tweets about The Goonies and ’90s sitcoms, and loves watching golden-age Holly wood musicals? He also rocks a cinnamoncolored Afro that’s earned him the proud nickname of “Sideshow Rob.” He may be the most Portlandian Blazer since Bill Walton. And with his rebounding, defensive presence and hustle contributing to the Blazers’ best start in a decade, Lopez is poised to become the team’s biggest cult hero since Channing Frye. WW talked with Lopez to drill down further into his geekery. WW: Are you aware how well you fit the Portland archetype? Robin Lopez: I played with Channing Frye in Phoenix, and he told me I’d fit right in. I love it. It fits like a glove. What were you like as a kid? I was pretty creative. Brook [Lopez, his twin brother who plays for the Brooklyn Nets] and I were pretty imaginative. We always had pretty wide interests. Did basketball interest you first or did everything come at once? It was definitely a concurrent development. I was kind of born into basketball, because my older brothers played. And

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

then, likewise, I was also born into the art world. My aunt’s an architect, and my grandma, as a Christmas gift, she would always give us an art box. My grandma in Fresno, when we lived in L.A., she had a huge library—I think it was the biggest library of children’s books in the Central Valley. There was this huge collection for us, and every time we went there it was just a treasure trove. Where did the Disney obsession start? I grew up during the renaissance, so there were great animated films to pick from. There was something appealing about the movies. They’re so universal. What’s your favorite ride at Disneyland? Pirates of the Caribbean, by far. It’s the best re-creation of reality they’ve done so far. There’s a storyline, and it kind of gets lost. They did such a great job of putting subtle themes in the ride. Everything’s very deliberate. But it is also very natural, very chaotic in its own sense. There’s something perfect about that, and it’s not been topped. Since you’ve become famous, have you been to the secret Disneyland club that serves alcohol? Club 33? It’s cool. Brook and I became members. That’s one of the things we always wanted to do since we were little, because you always hear about it. Going up there for the first time, that felt like holy ground a little bit. It was surreal. How many comics do you own? Not as many as Brook. He’s pretty much collecting everything DC Comics publishes right now. I have t wo or three titles I’ve collected and tried to complete those runs. You’ve said since Brook signed such a huge contract with the Nets, he’s now just blowing it on comics. With comic books, for the most part, it’s not a costly addiction. It’s not like Fabergé eggs.

THE CHUNK OF DUNK: Robin Lopez blows past the Houston Rockets’ Chandler Parsons at Moda Center on Dec. 12. “Those are two spheres that usually don’t interconnect,” Lopez says of his interests outside of basketball. “I try to keep them separate because it gives me a little sanctuary to go to.”

What is the crown jewel in your personal collection? I do have a complete run of Teen Titans from their fi rst print to Secret Origins to now, even though I’m not a big fan of the Essential series. I’m kind of just collecting out of the completist sense.

Is there a gem out there that you’re hunting for? Showcase No. 4, the first appearance of the Barry Allen Flash. Flash Comics No. 1, which is the fi rst golden-age Flash comic. Walt Disney’s Comics and Stories No. 1—I have it, but it’s in very ratty condition.

sports It’s probably only worth $200. A very fine copy would be like $80,000. W hat’s the geekiest thing you’ve bought since being in the NBA that you’ve spent a lot of money on? It wasn’t too expensive. Nike and Michael J. Fox partnered to put out the Air McFlys on eBay. I did get a pair of those for, like, $20,000. You’re an illustrator yourself. Who are your favorite artists? To go from earliest to latest: There’s always, you know, Winsor McCay, Walt Kelly, Al Capp. Will Eisner, Edward Gorey, Marc Davis. For the more typical superhero artists, George Perez, Carl Barks and Don Rosa. Tim Burton. Theodore Geisel. On Twitter, you compared this team to the Goonies. What Goonie-ish qualities do you see in this squad? The Goonies a re a close-k nit g roup. They believe in themselves, even though there are doubters throwing darts at them outside. I posted that catch phrase a couple times, “Goonies never say die.” That’s pretty in line with the mentality of our team. I asked Damian [Lillard] if he had seen Goonies. He said no. I’m questioning how many people on this team have actually seen the movie. You said you’re the Chunk of the team. There aren’t too many clean parallels

between people and their characters. I definitely do think Wes [Matthews] is Mouth. As far as Chunk goes, I think we’re both very ridiculous, maybe in different ways. When the Blazers brought you in, did you have an idea of what your role was going to be? Just looking at the roster, I knew I was out there to do the dirty work—get extra possessions, stuff like that.

“WITH comIc books, for THe mosT parT, IT’s noT a cosTly addIcTIon. IT’s noT lIke fabergé eggs.”

What do you think this team needs to make a deep playoff run? We’re focusing on getting back to where we were defensively during that winning streak. There’s always room for improvement. Is this year’s team tough enough? That’s another knock.

NEWS

Oh really? That’s a moronic knock. Without a doubt, I don’t think toughness or greediness is an issue.

Brook ’s dedication to basketball just because we had outside interests, which is pretty ridiculous when you think about it.

In a recent game in Detroit, you wrestled Hooper, the Pistons’ mascot, to the ground. I was protecting myself. That was selfdefense.

Prior to entering the draft, you suggested you were hesitant about going into the NBA. Have you found it hard fitting in with the league’s culture? Not at all. Your college mindset is always vastly different from who you end up being. My mindset will be different five years from now; it’ll be different a year from now. I really had no idea what NBA culture was like. I didn’t really have an idea of what people were like. Just like anybody on the street, people are just regular dudes.

Which is the NBA’s most annoying mascot? The Toronto Raptor. I wish we could go back to Toronto, because he gets my goat. I have a few choice words for that guy. Can you elaborate on that? No. He knows. A re you happy to get out of New Orleans before the arrival of Pierre the Pelican? He’s the most frightening thing I’ve ever seen in my life. He does look like he’ll haunt your nightmares. I’m a pretty big fan of the name, if you just embrace the ridiculousness of it. As far as Pierre the Pelican goes, I don’t know what it is with the eye shadow. It’s not a becoming look for him. It’s almost Joker-ish. Pro athletes often show a single-minded devotion to their sport. Do your broad interests ever alienate you from other athletes? There were times during the draft where people were questioning myself and

W hat a re your top three favorite wizards? Gandalf’s definitely on the list. Trying to pick my favorite Harry Potter wizard, I can easily go with Dumbledore. I always liked Professor Lupin. I’ll put him on the list. [A day after the interview, Lopez asked via his publicist to take Lupin off his list and replace him with Hermione Granger.] I got to pick a Disney wizard. Can I pick Angela Lansbury in Bedknobs and Broomsticks? Angela Lansbury? She’s not a particularly great wizard, but I just love that movie so much. Maybe it’s the combination of her and David Tomlinson’s character. Those are my three.

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eaking

ead 12

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

HOW THE REDEMPTION STORY OF TROUBLED BAKER DAVE DAHL BEGAN TO CRUMBLE.

amesh@wweek.com

or years, a 6-foot cardboard cutout of Dave Dahl greeted customers at Dave’s Killer Breadquarters in Milwaukie. In the photograph, a grinning Dahl—with his baker’s smock, ponytail and anvil chin—held a tray of the loaves that transformed a oncesleepy family bakery and made him famous. But on the morning of Nov. 14, the real Dave Dahl walked into the lobby of the Milwaukie outlet store. His hair now cropped short and gray, Dahl berated customers and employees— “preaching,” according to a 911 call made by Dan Letchinger, the company’s marketing manager. Dahl walked over to his photograph. “He smashed a life-sized cutout of himself,” Letchinger told the 911 dispatcher, “because he is the symbol of a brand.” Each Dave’s Killer Bread wrapper carries a cartoon drawing of its namesake, smiling, confident and strumming an electric guitar. “A whole lot of suffering,” the wrapper says, “has transformed an ex-con into an honest man who is doing his best to make the world a better place…one loaf of bread at a time.” The bread is good enough to sell itself, but Dave’s own redemption story is what made him legendary: a violent criminal and addict gone straight who created a product people loved. Ten hours after his Nov. 14 appearance at the outlet store, Dahl, who turns 51 this week, rammed two Washington County sheriff’s patrol cars with his Cadillac Escalade. Deputies had been called to deal with a man having a “mental breakdown.” Dahl faces a felony charge of second-degree attempted assault with a dangerous weapon. He declined to speak to WW for this story. The news was heartbreaking for Dave’s Killer Bread, a family company with close-

knit employees, as well as customers who admired Dahl’s efforts to stay sober and out of trouble. “Dave is a real person with real challenges,” CEO John V. Tucker tells WW in an email. “He has been very public about his struggles with mental health and addiction.” Dahl’s potential return to prison underscores the risks the company took by turning him into a cheerful cartoon character on its label—Tony the Tiger, but with a rap sheet. It’s not clear what triggered Dahl’s most recent troubles, but five people who know him tell WW he has been drinking since at least 2011. Three say they have seen him become increasingly dependent on alcohol. The people who know Dahl say he was drinking when the company sold a 50-percent stake to a New York investment firm in late 2012 to expand Dave’s Killer Bread beyond the 14 Western states where it’s sold now. It’s not clear what the firm, Goode Partners, knew about Dahl’s drinking, which could pose a threat to the clean-and-sober image used to market the company’s bread. “We are truly and deeply committed to the legacy that we have been handed,” Tucker, who was named the bakery’s CEO last April, tells WW. “We intend to make Dave’s Killer Bread a national brand. There hasn’t been any change in that plan.” In 2009, Glenn Dahl told Inc. magazine that the rise of Dave’s Killer Bread depended on his brother staying clean. “But if he did relapse?” Glenn Dahl asked. “The company would suffer, tremendously. I’d do everything I could to stop that from happening.”

CONT. on page 14

KENNETH HUEY

BY AARON MESH

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cont.

B e t h l ay n e h a n s e n

BREAKING BREAD

REBORN AND BREAD: The Milwaukie headquarters of Dahl family company NatureBake (above and below) have been renamed Dave’s Killer Breadquarters. On Nov. 14, police visited the outlet store because Dave Dahl was frightening employees and customers.

ave Dahl made his mark in a whitebread industry. Americans buy $21 billion worth of bread a year. The market is rapidly consolidating—with huge corporations like Flowers Foods and Bimbo Bakeries USA gobbling larger portions. In Portland, regional baking brands Franz and Oroweat dominate. Lots of small bakeries are trying to stay afloat— like the one run for 58 years by the Dahl family. Ja mes A . “Jim” Da hl sta r ted out making doughnuts in 1955. He began to

B e t h l ay n e h a n s e n

“Dave’s Killer BreaD is the Biggest explosion i’ve seen in 40 years in the BreaD Business.” —RichaRd ShymanSki, foRmeR SaleS manageR

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

specialize in organic breads in the ’60s—a tough market then, made tougher because he didn’t like the hippies who would become his customers. He created a signature product, a sprouted-wheat bread he called Surviva, in a shop on Southeast 122nd Avenue and Division Street in Portland. Jim Da hl died in 1998. For three decades, the family bakery has been run by his eldest son, Glenn, 59. “They’re still fairly regional,” says Eric J. Schroeder, managing editor of the trade publication Food Business News. “It’s safe to say they’ve made a fairly significant jump.” That transformation began when Dave Dahl arrived on Dec. 27, 2004, after he got out of prison for the last time. Glenn Dahl gave him a ride home from the bus station and offered him a $12-an-hour job at the bakery. Dave, then 41, never liked working at the family bakery. But Glenn had given his younger brother a chance to go straight. “Dave was always the most creative among the four siblings,” Glenn Dahl tells WW by email. “He has a wonderful ability to know what tastes good and what might make it taste better.” Glenn encouraged Dave to work on a line of breads intended to appeal to younger customers. W hat Dahl created were breads so dense with seeds—sunflower, flax, pumpkin and sesame—that the loaves looked like they’d been rolled in a bird feeder. Dahl dubbed the breads “killer.” He debuted four bread varieties—Killer Bread, Blues Bread, Rockin’ Rye and Good Seed—on Aug. 4, 2005, at the Portland Farmers Market in the Pearl District. The vegan, USDA-certified organic

bread dovetailed with the ascension of boutique grocers like Whole Foods and New Seasons, and patrons willing to pay $5 for an artisanal loaf. T he ba ker y employ s ne a rly 3 0 0 people, producing a line of 15 breads. Until recently, the company was known as NatureBake. Now, everything it sells bears the Dave’s Killer Bread logo. Its annual sales total $53 million—up from $3 million a decade ago, when the company started shifting its emphasis away from old product lines as Dave’s Killer Bread took off. “I go out there and tell my story,” Dave Dahl explained to The Register-Guard in Eugene in 2011. “People want to hear it, and they’ll buy my bread.”

he power of that story was made stark by the depths Dahl had reached. The Dahl family’s third son chafed at his strict Seventh-day Adventist upbringing. He was drinking, smoking weed and taking hallucinogens by the time he was a teenager. “Alcohol seemed pretty cool,” he wrote in a 2008 memoir, Good Seed, “releasing my inhibitions and deadening the pain as I bounced my head off of sidewalks and fists.” He was tormented by depression. “The strongest memories I have from my childhood,” he writes, “are those of contemplating suicide.” He dropped out of Gresham High School in 1980, took his first injection of crystal meth in 1984 and was arrested for the first time in 1987, for burglarizing a house. Over the years, Dahl was convicted of eight felonies. He did time in Walpole, Mass., for armed robbery. He did a year in Oregon after he shoplifted a $12.99

ahl’s story and unique bread offered his family’s company what business executives like to call a “killer product” —an item that redefines the market. But it also created risks the bakery had never faced before. Richard Shymanski, NatureBake’s longtime sales manager, remembers Dahl pushing aggressively to give his breads a central place in the company. Dahl wanted NatureBake to assign full shifts of workers to his bread. He wanted more space on the company’s shelves in grocery stores. “We’ve got a 48-year-old product that we’re married to, basically,” recalls Shymanski. “Here comes Dave with this new product he wanted us to push, and push hard.” Da hl’s pressure to have his products play a larger role created tensions between Dave, Glenn, and Glenn’s son Shobi Dahl. Shobi Dahl, 30, graduated in 2005

“Dave is a real person with real challenges. he has been very public about his struggles with mental health anD aDDiction.” —John V. Tucker, ceo of DaVe’s killer BreaD from Willamette University with a degree in economics—and joined the family business just as Dave Dahl began making his own breads. Shobi—who rose to become the company CEO before Goode Partners invested last year—worked with his uncle on designing the Dave’s Killer Bread wrappers. Shobi Dahl declined to speak to WW. An internal 2008 email, first published in a profile of the Dahls by Inc. magazine four years ago, reveals the relationship wasn’t just tense—it was sometimes frightening. “You are incapable of intelligent conversation that does not involve yelling,” Shobi wrote to Dave. “You have an ‘I am god of bread, bow down’ aura around you that makes me sick to my stomach…. You threatened to hit me.”

Lee Warren, a convicted felon, started working at NatureBake in January 2011, and left last year to start a bakery for Iron Tribe, a Clackamas-based drug and alcohol recovery program for ex-cons. He’s known Dahl for more than a decade. “When Dave is Dave,” Warren says, “ he’s g iven so ma ny people second chances.”

t’s not clear when Dave Dahl’s redemption story fell apart. But by the middle of 2011, he was drinking again, according to what three of Dahl’s friends tell WW. It was something he and his family knew could jeopardize the business. Glenn Dahl and other company officials declined comment on when they knew the company’s icon was drinking. By last year, the company was looking

for outside investors, people who would sink millions into Dave’s Killer Bread to expand the brand, largely on the reputation of Dahl and his clean-living story. They found one. On Dec. 27, 2012, Dahl announced it himself. “Hey, guys, I’ve got some killer fucking news,” Dahl said in a Web video, the company bleeping out the obscenity. The amount the New York-based private equity firm Goode Partners invested in Dave’s Killer Bread has not been made public. Goode Partners’ website, however, says the investment firm usually sinks $10 million to $30 million into its ventures. Goode Partners specializes in taking regional brands and launching them nationally. The firm did this recently with the Austin, Texas-based Mexican restaurant chain Chuy’s. Perhaps its best-known success is Skullcandy, the Utah headphone manufacturer. Goode invested in the company in 2009. By 2011, it made an initial public offering of stock, which is now traded on the Nasdaq market. Industry experts say whether or not the Dahls mentioned Dave’s drinking, his addiction history added risk to the purchase. “It probably wouldn’t stop me from buying,” says John von Schlegell, managing director of Endeavor Capital, a Portland-based private equity firm that has invested in WinCo Foods and New Seasons Market. “It would go into the reward-risk calculations. Ever ybody knows he had rehab issues, and that’s part of the mystique.” As part of the deal, Glenn and Shobi Dahl remained on the Dave’s Killer Bread board of directors but stepped down as chairman and CEO, respectively. Dave Dahl remained president of the company. In 2013, Dahl bought his second house in Milwaukie, and a cabin in Zigzag, a town in Mount Hood National Forest. He also bought a new Chevrolet Corvette and a Cadillac Escalade. By spring, however, the company knew

CRASH COURSE: Dave Dahl’s mug shots date from the 1980s and ’90s (below) to Nov. 14, 2013 (bottom), when he crashed his Cadillac Escalade into a Washington County sheriff’s patrol car (above). o r e g o n D e pa r t m e n t o f corrections

Dave Dahl has said Shobi’s accusations were false. Glenn Dahl told Inc. that Dave never hit Shobi but was sometimes “a fraction of an inch away” from violence. Shymanski says Dave Dahl won out inside NatureBake because customers demanded his bread. “He was right in saying we should have been focusing more on his stuff earlier,” Shymanski says. “Dave’s Killer Bread is the biggest explosion I’ve seen in 40 years in the bread business.” The boom emerged from a decision by the Dahls: They could have just sold great bread, but they decided to put Dave front and center in the marketing scheme. Each wrapper includes a personal testimony: “15 years in prison is a pretty tough way to find oneself, but I have no regrets,” Dahl says in one version of the wrapper. “If I had not suffered, I can safely assure you that you would not be reading the label on a loaf of my Killer Bread.” His fame took off. WW reported Dahl’s comeback story in a 2006 farmers market feature. Since then, profiles of Dahl playing up his prodigal-son story have been run by more than two dozen media outlets, including The Oregonian, 1859 magazine, MSNBC and The New York Times. Each stor y repeated Da hl’s turnaround, as summarized by Portland Family magazine: “the formerly depressed, drug-addicted convict-turned-breadguru businessman extraordinaire.” He told his story to inmates at California’s San Quentin State Prison and to businessmen at the Portland Business Journal’s annual power breakfast. “You start now,” he told teenagers at Salem’s Hillcrest Youth Correctional Facility in 2011. “I don’t have a lot of respect for people who aren’t making changes in their own lives.” Dave’s Killer Bread took that idea seriously. The company worked closely with mental-health nonprofits. Nearly 30 percent of the company’s employees are ex-cons.

wa s h i n g to n c o u n t y s h e r r i f f ’ s o f f i c e

cellphone accessory from the Wilsonville G.I. Joe’s. He fought with the G.I. Joe’s security guards who stopped him, and he battled Portland cops in 1997 after trying to run away to escape a drug bust. “Why don’t you just beat me to death,” Dahl asked the arresting officer, “and make us both happy?” His last and longest stretch, for a meth-dealing conviction, came at Snake River Correctional Institution, the state’s largest prison, located outside the Eastern Oregon desert town of Ontario. Three years into his stay, Dahl decided to see a prison psychiatrist. Records show he was prescribed antidepressants. Dahl has said admitting he needed help with mental illness transformed him. He started taking computer-aided drafting classes, and for the first time felt successful. “I hadn’t found Jesus,” Dahl writes in Good Seed, “but I had found a way of living that gave me the strength to leave the needle behind.”

BREAKING BREAD wa s h i n g to n c o u n t y s h e r r i f f ’ s o f f i c e

cont.

cont. on page 16 Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

BREAKING BREAD

CONT.

OREGON DOT

GIVING TESTIMONY: Dave Dahl has regularly delivered speeches on his turnaround, including this one to the Oregon Department of Transportation in 2010.

he was struggling. In late May, Dahl went to a rehab clinic in Utah, according to two longtime friends. They say he was compelled by an intervention from family and employees. Text messages sent by Dahl to a friend show that by August, after returning from rehab, he was on leave from the bakery. Other events during the summer point to Dahl drinking to excess. On Aug. 3, a 39-year-old former meth addict named Christopher Aaron Isaac Dailey went to stay with Dahl for a “boys’

“I DON’T HAVE A LOT OF RESPECT FOR PEOPLE WHO AREN’T MAKING CHANGES IN THEIR OWN LIVES.” —DAVE DAHL

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

night” at Dahl’s cabin in Zigzag. Dailey’s family members say he and Dahl met a decade ago in a prison van coming from Snake River Correctional Institution. W hat took place at t he c abi n is recounted in a missing-person report filed on Dailey with the Clackamas County Sheriff’s Office, and statements made by Barbara Lively, Dailey’s longtime partner, more than a week later. “Mr. Dahl has been having alcohol troubles and believed he needed time with the guys to cope,” Lively told a sheriff’s detective Aug. 20, according to the report. “She thought Mr. Dahl was also leaning on Mr. Dailey, who had been sober.” That night, Lively told the detective, Dailey called her to confess he had been drinking—he told her Dahl had brought booze to the Zigzag cabin. “Ms. Lively said Mr. Dahl had brought the alcohol to the cabin,” the missing-person report says. “She told me she was scared because Mr. Dailey ‘doesn’t mix well with alcohol.’” At 3:30 the nex t morning, sheriff records show, Dahl loaned Dailey his Cadillac Escalade. When Dailey didn’t come back, Michelle Bain, Dahl’s fiancee, reported the Escalade stolen. T he E s c a l a de w a s r e c over e d i n Fairview later that day, but Dailey had vanished. On Sept. 24, his body was found in a field alongside a blackberry bramble and a paint shop in Lents. His death is under investigation by Portland police. Lively blames Dahl for starting the chain of events that led to Dailey’s death. “The person I love was sitting for so long over in those blackberry bushes,” she says. “It just makes me sick.”

ave Dahl declined through his attorney, Stephen Houze, to answer WW’s questions regarding Dailey’s death, allegations of his drinking, and the Nov. 14 incidents at the Breadquarters and with Washington County sheriff deputies. In a statement, Houze said Dahl could not comment because of the pending criminal charges. “However,” Houze added, “Mr. Dahl and his entire family wish to express their appreciation for the concern, support and respect for his privacy that has been shown by so many during his recent mental health crisis.” Dave’s Killer Bread has posted an FAQ about the events on Nov. 14 on its website. It poses the question whether Dahl was “under the influence” at the bakery outlet store: “We don’t know.” About 10 pm on Nov. 14, Washington County sheriff’s deputies responded to a disturbance call at 2455 SW Timberline Drive in Cedar Hills—the home of Bill McShane, a personal investment adviser with Umpqua Investments. A woman called to report Dahl was acting erratically. Deputies arrived in two patrol cars as Dahl was leaving in his black Cadillac Escalade. He rammed one of the patrol cars head-on. Deputies pursued him in their cars for a half-mile down Timberline Drive. Cornered, Dahl twice rammed another patrol car before being pinned by a third. The Washington County sheriff and district attorney’s offices declined WW’s request to release information about whether Dahl had alcohol or drugs in his system at the time of his arrest. Both offices say those records are sealed while the case remains open. McShane bailed Dahl out of jail, and Dahl is on leave as president of the bread company. On Nov. 19, Bain, Dahl’s fiancee, posted a message on her Facebook page she said was written by Dahl. “The most challenging circumstances can be used to bring about miraculous change in our lives,” the message says, “and that’s my plan for the future.” Jerry Gjesvold works with Oregon drug and alcohol treatment center Serenit y La ne to help compa nies develop substance abuse policies. He’s been a recovering alcoholic for 36 years—and says sudden success poses dangers for former addicts. “When good, positive things start to happen to you,” Gjesvold says, “you feel unworthy. I’m sure that there’s a sense, ‘Do I really deserve this?’ He knew where to go and what to do to not feel that.” WW asked Glenn Dahl by email what customers should think about his brother’s struggles and what remains of the redemption story that helped sell Dave’s Killer Bread. “Healing and recovery is a lifelong process,” Glenn Da hl says. “ Dave is human, and redemption is a journey for all of us.”

W W interns Ramona DeNies, Ravleen Kaur and Alex Tomchak Scott contributed to this story.

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Willamette Week’s

3rd Annual

Nonprofits, Here’s your best chance to find great volunteers for the new year ahead! On January 15 and 22, Willamette Week will be publishing — in print and online — our third annual Volunteer Guide.

It works! Hurry: The deadline is Thursday 1/9 at 4pm. Contact Matt Plambeck at WW to learn more.

Call 503-445-2757 or go to wweek.com/volunteerguide Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

FOOD: Boil, boil, toil and trouble at the vegan strip club. MUSIC: Patterson Hood is still truckin’. STAGE: Dance meets parkour. MOVIES: Spike Jonze and Scarlett Johansson’s voice.

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SCOOP GOSSIP HAPPILY OUTSIDE THE POLAR VORTEX. THE END IS NAY: The Bitter End Pub, the onetime Timbers Army hangout on West Burnside Street that closed for the second time at the end of 2012, has languished in remodeling limbo ever since, despite plans to reopen last summer when the Portland Timbers were in the middle of their season. In December, the Bitter End launched a Kickstarter campaign to ﬁnally open this winter, with a fundraising goal of $20,000. As of Jan. 6, however, with 11 days left in a 30-day campaign, the numbers have been sour: just $745 raised. >> In more successful Kickstarter news, the Portland Institute for Contemporary Art exceeded its $25,000 goal by about $3,000. That campaign, which ended Jan. 2, was a fundraiser for the annual Time-Based Art Festival. It’s relatively small change for the avant-garde art organization, a 17-year-old nonproﬁt that brings in more than $1 million annually in grants and donations.

BOOK LOOK: The 2014 Oregon Book Awards finalists have just been announced. The fiction category includes the collected short fiction of Portland sci-fi writer Ursula K. Le Guin, author of the Wizard of Earthsea cycle. The poetry contenders include National Book Award winner Mary Szybist and New Yorker mainstay Matthew Dickman. Graham Salisbury will compete LE GUIN for a record seventh Oregon Book Award in the children’s category. In the graphic category, works by journalists Joe Sacco and Steve Duin will go head-to-head with Craig Thompson’s 672-page opus, Habibi. The awards ceremony is March 17 at the Gerding Theater. HAIRY SITUATION: Anger continues to bubble online about inconsistently carbonated brews from Portland’s legendary Hair of the Dog. In recent days, customers have launched threads complaining about flat Doggie Claws and Fred on beeradvocate.com and on the brewery’s Facebook page. Brewmaster Alan Sprints remains unmoved. “Conditioning creates uneven results, especially with high-alcohol beers,” he writes. “That is why I have always marked each batch with a special number. Some of the batches that I have not been happy with have turned into the most popular ones after a few years. Beer is more than bubbles.” 20

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

MARIAN WOOD KOLISCH

CAT SCRATCHED: The Black Cat Cafe on Northeast Alberta Street quietly changed hands in December, and will get a new name later this month. New co-owner Travis Hendricks of the band Souvenir Driver (and former stage manager for the Dandy Warhols) says they’ll be ﬁxing up the space without shutting it down for longer than a few days. The new owners have picked out a name for the place, but Hendricks declined to divulge it, saying he wants all changes to be gradual to avoid losing clientele. “The place has a lot of history,” he says. “Eleven years of it, good and bad. Locals love the place.” >> Cinemagic, Southeast Hawthorne Boulevard’s old-school grindhouse, ﬁnally intends to join the ranks of movie theaters serving alcohol, recently applying for a beer and wine license.

#HEADOUT #TROLLFOOD COMEDIAN KYLE KINANE HUMILIATED HIMSELF TROLLING PACE SALSA. HE NOW TRIES AGAIN. It began as an innocent test. When standup comic Kyle Kinane noticed that his tweets rebuking Pace Picante Salsa’s misogynistic advertising had been favorited by the company’s very own Twitter account, he decided to make a few more vulgar remarks. Pace favorited them all. From there, it became a tangled, near-surrealistic dance of mischief, outrage and aborted heroism. Several Pace employees entered the fray, including one who seemingly fi red an underling for getting involved. Kinane came to the employee’s defense. The hashtag #BringBackMiles spread across Twitter.

But, like Elan Gale’s Thanksgiving feud with an imaginary airplane passenger, it was a hoax: Another comedian had been behind the Pace account all along, and Kinane was the punked do-gooder left with his tail between his legs. To welcome Kinane to Portland—he hits Helium for a three-night stand starting Thursday, Jan. 9—we asked him to troll a few other companies on Twitter. Here’s what he wrote. REBECCA JACOBSON.

@campbellsfood You guys should give me some free soup for that Pace Salsa debacle that happened a month ago.

@cirquedusoleil You guys are just KISS with gymnastics but I’ll keep it a secret for a couple tickets to that horse show you guys are putting on out by the airport.

@DrWho Can’t you do at least ONE episode where Bill and Ted crash into the Tardis with their phone booth?

@wikileaks Big Mac sauce is just thousand island dressing. I moved to Switzerland just so I could tell the world this.

I’ve been telling people I’ve been investing my retirement with the help of @ParkerBrothers and @MiltonBradley. Not as many people catch on as you’d hope.

PAC E S A L S A , PAC E F O O D S . W I K I L E A K S , W I K I L E A K S . KY L E K I N A N E , KY L E K I N A N E . D R . W H O, R E P T 0 N 1 X / CC . T H E G O L D E N G I R L S , N B C .

WILLAMETTE WEEK

WHAT TO DO THIS WEEK IN ARTS & CULTURE

WEDNESDAY JAN. 8 PATTERSON HOOD [MUSIC] The lead Drive-By Trucker kicks oﬀ a three-week Portland residency, playing songs from across his career and supported by the Northwest’s own rambling troubadours, including Willy Vlautin, Fernando Viciconte and Sera Cahoone. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 231-9663. 9 pm. $12 advance, $14 day of show. 21+.

SATURDAY JAN. 11 OLD RUSSIAN NEW YEAR [ENDLESS PARTY] Not yet ready to let go of all the holiday revelry? Lucky for you, Russia’s religious New Year doesn’t take place until a few weeks into January. Rambunctious, folky party-rock band Chervona has been throwing its Old New Year celebration for seven years. It’s wild, sweaty and partially sung in Russian. Star Theater, 13 NW 6th Ave, 2484700. 9 pm. $20. 21+.

SUNDAY JAN. 12 SECOND SUNDAY CIDER [BOOZE] The cider is free, the cheese will cost you. Brooklyn House and HipCider author Tyler Hurst pour free samples from Washington’s Schilling, which makes oak-aged, spiced and ginger ciders, paired with a $10 cheese board. If you’re unfamiliar with the magic of a cheese-and-cider pairing, learn and love. Brooklyn House, 3131 SE 12th Ave., 236-6761, brooklynhouserestaurant.com. 5-7 pm.

MONDAY JAN. 13 TALES OF BALLYCUMBER [THEATER] Corrib Theatre, a local company specializing in Irish drama, begins its second season with a staged reading of Sebastian Barry’s 2009 play. It’s a ghostly drama about a bachelor farmer who gives a piece of advice to a teenage neighbor, only to have things go terribly and tragically awry. Lumber Room, 419 NW 9th Ave., corribtheatre.org. 7:30 pm. $10.

@Bojangles One time when I was 19 and in Florida one of your employees called me a bitch because I couldn’t ﬁnish my biscuits and I haven’t been back since, fyi.

GO: Kyle Kinane is at Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave., 888-643-8669. 8 pm Thursday and 7:30 and 10 pm Friday-Saturday, Jan. 9-11. $15-$25.

ISHMAEL BEAH [BOOKS] In 2007, Ishmael Beah topped bestseller lists with his memoir A Long Way Gone, about child soldiers in Sierra Leone’s civil war. Now with his ﬁrst novel, Radiance of Tomorrow, Beah returns to his home country to explore how two friends can rebuild a life in a war-torn village. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 2284651. 7:30 pm. Free.

TUESDAY JAN. 14 TWIN TWIN PEAKS [MOVIES] Twentyish years after the abrupt cancellation of David Lynch’s ’90s network-TV oddity, the show’s hardcore devotees got together to ﬁlm this continuation of the Twin Peaks mythos. Considering the predilections of most fan-ﬁc, we’re guessing Special Agent Cooper has sex with a slice of cherry pie. Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison St., 2397639. 9:30 pm. Free. 21+. Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

FOOD & DRINK EAT MOBILE B E T H L AY N E H A N S E N

= WW Pick. Highly recommended. By MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Editor: MARTIN CIZMAR. Email: dish@wweek.com. See page 3 for submission instructions.

WEDNESDAY, JAN. 8 Big-Ass Beer Month

With a kickoﬀ on New Year’s Day, Rogue’s Green Dragon pub— known more for its hosting of light, ﬂ avorful Buckman Botanical brewery—is hosting big dark beers that swing a brickbat for the entire month of January, with a new release each week. This week’s is the 10-percent ABV Old Deadhead barrel-aged barleywine, which mashes up four malts with two hop varietals and two yeasts, and is aged in a whiskey barrel for three months. Even the math on this one clubs you over the head. Green Dragon, 928 SE 9th Ave., 517-0660. 11 am-11 pm Sundays-Wednesdays, 11 am-1 am Thursdays-Saturdays. Through Jan. 31. Prices vary.

Vegan Dishes Available

Cheese and Wine at Ristretto

Jobs for the Food and Drink Industry Staffing solutions for owners and managers NYC/ CHI/ SFO/ SEA /PDX/ AUS

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6/10/12 9:41 AM

Ristretto Roasters, with its Northeast Couch Street location, has been making every eff ort to branch out into a full-service lifestyle spot, branching from daytime coff ee into evening wines. The chef’s tasting series is another arm of this, recently hosting Newman’s oysters in November, beers from Burnside around the corner in December and, this month, wine-and-cheese pairings from Steve Jones’ Cheese Bar, along with coff ee-caramel jam. The cheese is free with the wine, so if you already wanted wine, we recommend you go to the place where it comes with the cheese. Ristretto Roasters, 555 NE Couch Street, 284-6767. 5-8 pm. Prices vary.

SUNDAY, JAN. 12 Second Sunday Cider

The world is a big place, and there are lots of cheese pairings. Brooklyn House may be centered on continental Euro comforts in its food, but it also nods to its surrounding neighborhood’s focus on ciders with its Second Sunday cider nights, when HipCider author Tyler Hurst hosts free tastings from a diﬀ erent cidery each month, paired with a cheese board designed to complement the ciders for an additional $10. (For those unfamiliar with the magic of a cheese-andcider pairing, don’t let this lamentable situation continue.) This week, the guest is Schilling Cider from Auburn, Wash., oﬀ ering oakaged, spiced and ginger ciders. Brooklyn House, 3131 SE 12th Ave. , 236-6761. 5-7 pm. Prices vary.

Brewvana New Year New Brew Tour

Herman Jolly

and Nate Wey from Souvenir Driver Thursday 1/9 at 8pm Thursdays • Free • No Cover

$1 PBRs 22

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

This event is built on the notion, we suppose, that new years demand new beers. Why argue? Except, perhaps, with the fact that, of the three breweries on the tour (which includes time spent tripping among the fermenters), the star-crossed Ecliptic is really the only fully ﬂ edged new brewery of the bunch (though it’s run by that most familiar of Portland standby master brewers, John Harris). The gluten-free Harvester is celebrating a recent expansion, and 13 Virtues is an expansion and rebranding from its old subsummation under the Philadelphia’s brand: Still, with 13 virtuous beers on tap, who’s gonna front if old Ben Franklin says you’ve got to live by all of them? Multiple locations, 729-6804. 4 pm. $69 per person.

BEEF & HART: Road Runner’s chef shows oﬀ the brisket.

ROAD RUNNER BARBECUE After dark, as the eateries begin to close and dim, the sprawling Carts on Foster lot begins to look less like a food pod and more like a spooky trailer park—the sort of backwater roadside spot you’ve always heard is home to the best barbecue. Well, it is. At Road Runner Barbecue, Texas-born Jimmy Hart slow-cooks his tender take on the mesquite brisket ($11) that’s sent generations traveling the country highways winding between Austin and San Antonio. The sliced version lets you survey the handiwork in the colors of the beef—its smoky bark, center and lovely pink rim are so brightly distinguished, it’s like the inside Order this: Chopped brisket sandwich ($7), or sliced brisket platter of a thunder egg—but on the ($11) with sides of mac ’n’ cheese sandwiches ($7-$8), the fattier and potato salad. chopped version may be king. They were out of chicken on my visit, but the cart’s painted picture of The Simpsons’ Chief Wiggum announced the best pig in town—and indeed, the humble pork butt ($10), a fatty mess of meat chunks textured with char, manages to rival the beef, if not quite surpass it. The house tomato-based sauce, served on the side, is molasses-sweet and blessedly hot even when the squeeze bottle says “mild.” The “hot” version adds habanero for the masochist, but the mild is a perfectly balanced masterpiece; those who travel to Buster’s just for the sauce can now stop doing so. The other sides and garnishes, from the unexpected bite in the potato salad to the mustard-seeded pickles, show equal attention to spice. In the flat, dead air of a Portland winter, a little parking-lot Texas heat might do you some good. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. EAT: Road Runner Barbecue, Southeast 52nd Avenue and Foster Road (Carts on Foster pod), 310-2728, roadrunnerbbq.com. 11 am-8 pm Wednesday-Saturday, noon-6 pm Sunday.

ISARWEIZEN (HEATER ALLEN) American-made wheat beers tend to be dry, hoppy and, far too often, bland. The New World cousins of traditional German hefeweizens typically tone down the yeast’s tutti-frutti punch while amping up the bitterness. Heater Allen built its reputation on authentically Bohemian lagers, so it’s little surprise that the McMinnville brewery’s first ale began with a recipe imported directly from Germany. Lisa Allen, who brews with her father, Rick, had a college roommate who worked at a Munich brewpub and gifted her with the formula for this Bavarian-style wheat beer. If you’re used to Widmer or Blue Moon, prepare yourself: The Isarweizen will thump your nostrils with the smell of clove and then strike your tongue with the taste of banana. It’s creamy and crisp, kind of like chewing a slice of Juicy Fruit gum—and I mean that in the very best way. Heater Allen releases this cloudy and refreshing quaff in the spring, but if you can track down a leftover from last year— John’s Market had a few—it’s still in great shape. Recommended. REBECCA JACOBSON.

FOOD & DRINK

Lavish Buffets of Indian Cuisine

JEREK HOLLENDER

REVIEW INVITES YOU TO THE

2014

SHINNENKAI

JAPANESE NEW YEAR PARTY Thursday, January 16TH 2014

Exotic Dishes of Lamb, Chicken, Goat Gluten-Free, Vegetarian, Vegan Options

6:30 – 9:30pm Karaoke Room 8:30 –10:30pm

Ecotrust Building - 2nd Floor 721 NW 9TH Ave., Portland, OR

TRADITIONAL JAPANESE &

FOOD SAKE TIP $2 PER SONG: Yakisoba noodles (left) and the Diablo burger sit on the rail at Black Cauldron.

WITCH WAY HOW IS THE FOOD AT BLACK CAULDRON, PORTLAND’S SECOND VEGAN STRIP CLUB?

seated at the bar —it’s worth mentioning that these ladies a re independent contractors familiar with the fare and with no incentive to misrepresent their experience, making them reliable resources—the Indian snack packs BY M A RT I N C I Z M A R mcizmar@wweek.com big curry flavor into a golden-brown sachet of Some things are too good to be true. Unfortunate- potato and peas. The shell was a tad too oily ly, a seven-course vegan tasting menu at a strip and the inside was mushier than I prefer, but an excellent sweet chili dipping sauce made club in far-flung East Portland is one of them. W hen Casa Diablo owner Johnny Zukle up for it. opened his second club, Black Cauldron, on We happily used the extra sauce on a hayHalloween, he vowed to operate it as an all-ages stack-size pile of thin, crispy fries ($4) plated vegan restaurant until 7 pm. Blossoming Lotus with our Diablo burger ($4). The burger is built alum chef Jake Farrar was to helm the kitchen from a soy patty topped with raw onion, pickles, inside the imposing former Woodshed build- ketchup, mustard and a small splat of a vegan ing two blocks west of the Gresham border, Thousand Island dressing. It was unavailable preparing a prix-fi xe meal for two seatings per on our first visit because the previous night’s night—like Beast with a brass pole and no foie cook had neglected to thaw the buns. While it’s gras bonbon. no Sassy’s steak, there’s far worse grub at PortIt was a beautiful idea, perhaps hashed out land clubs of this ilk. between Drake songs in the T he ya k isoba ($6) is a middle of a long , sodden pile of wheat y noodles in night at the rail. I called to Order this: Samosa ($6), yakisoba ($6) a thin sauce that’s not terand fries ($4). make reservations on Dec. 1, ribly oily, salty or flavorful, I’ll pass: Mac and cheez ($6). exactly one month after the and a few hunks of batterBest deal: One free lap dance per hour Cauldron started bubbling, is given after 9 pm. fried tofu. As big plates of only to learn the ambitious noodles go, it easily betters pla n had been scrapped. the beef y stroga nof f ($6) Instead, Black Cauldron’s menu would be essen- that fell victim to the limitations of dairy and tially the same as Casa Diablo’s. But, despite that meat substitutes, ending up floppy, tepid and club’s international fame, no critic has ever done without any creaminess. a serious review. So why not let Trifecta, the new And now it’s time for the bottom. I found tavern from Beard Award-winning baker Ken vegan “mac and cheez” made with nutritional Forkish, rise for another week? yeast basically inedible—chasing every bite of Black Cauldron is housed in a pointy-roofed funky, rotten flavor with a sip of Vortex IPA and barn of moldering wood shingles. Interior walls a long look at the stage. Which basically reinare painted like the musty gray brick of an old forced my long-held belief that the best vegan castle—it looks like a haunted house constructed food is of Asian descent and that American by high-school theater geeks. In the center of the comforts are better left natural and animalroom, behind the pole, sits a “cauldron,” a round istic. Zukle and Farrar could have proven me bed of green faux fur that glistens with stripper wrong with that tasting menu. Then again, any dew. Unless you’re vegan, you’re probably bet- strip club that doesn’t leave customers a little ter off with a beer and a stack of $2 bills—not disappointed is probably due for a visit from stained red here, sadly—than a plate. the vice squad. Let’s start with the top. The samosa ($6) was the best thing we sam- EAT: Black Cauldron, 16015 SE Stark St., 2658929, blackcauldron.net. 11 am-2:30 am daily. pled in two visits. Recommended by a dancer

LIVE MUSIC

KARAOKE $50 PER PERSON | $30 STUDENT 21 AND OLDER

Namaste

Parkrose since 2009 8303 NE Sandy Blvd 503-257-5059

FOR MORE INFO: Erik Harebo | eharebo@jaso.org 503.552.8813

Vancouver since 2001 6300 NE 117th Ave 360-891-5857

NamasteIndianCuisine.com

Karaoke 9pm nightly Hydro Pong Saturday night

I get HAPPY 4-6pm Tues-Fri $3 menu

Tuesdstaryy: Fun Indu Night!

Dragon Lounge

Chinese-American Restaurant

2610 SE 82nd at Division 503-774-1135 Ho Ti

Read our story: canton-grill.com

STREET PG. 19 Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

MUSIC

jan. 8–14 PROFILE

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

A N DY T E N N I L L E

Prices listed are sometimes for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and socalled convenience charges may apply. Event lineups are subject to change after WW’s press deadlines. Editor: MATTHEW SINGER. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, go to wweek.com/ submitevents and follow submission directions. All shows should be submitted two weeks or more in advance of event. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: msinger@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

WEDNESDAY, JAN. 8 Lucy Wainwright Roche

[FOLKY FAMILY] Music is the family business for Lucy Wainwright Roche, with singer-songwriter parents Loudon Wainwright III and Suzzy Roche and half-brother and art-folk phenom Rufus Wainwright. Having toured over the years on Rufus’ coattails, Roche positions herself with her sophomore album, There’s a Last Time for Everything, as an accomplished frontwoman in her own right. “I know that the sun is steady on the rise,” Roche coos on “Under the Gun,” the strippeddown closing track of an album of tasteful, stately folk. Whether through nature, nurture or a combination of the two, Roche has tapped into her musical genes and is, herself, steady on the rise. GRACE STAINBACK. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 8 pm. $10 advance, $12 day of show. 21+.

THURSDAY, JAN. 9 Martha Davis & the Motels, Animotion, Tommy Tutone

A N DY T E N N I L L E

[ONE-OR-TWO-HIT WONDERS] If you were gonna peg Oregon to a musical decade, the ’80s mightn’t be your first choice, with our hippie rep and position within the blast range of the ’90s grunge explosion. But taking the stage tonight are three early MTV-era hitmakers, all with Oregon connections. Tommy Heath of Tommy Tutone was a longtime Portland resident post-fleeting fame, though he’s since decamped to California. Swapping states with him was the Motels’ scratchy-voiced chanteuse, Martha Davis, long tied to the L.A. scene but now the owner of a

72-acre Oregon farm. And hard-working Portland musician Bill Wadhams must draw a few “Don’t I know that guy?” stares around town, as he once sang of his “Obsession,” in heavy rotation, with Animotion. This show kicks off “’80s Weekend” at the Crystal. JEFF ROSENBERG. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 225-0047. 8 pm. $20 advance, $25 day of show. 21+.

Califone, the Luyas

[ATMOSPHERIC ROOTS] At its core, Califone is the mossy, overgrown remains of a folk band. Most tracks are built from strummy guitars and the gruff crooning of founding father Tim Rutili, but the similarities to suspenderclad roots rock ends right there. Rich atmospheric embellishments like found sound and spectral synth tones often roll over bare-bones rock arrangements like a fog, blurring the edges of Rutili’s sharp and soulful arrangements. PETE COTTELL. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 2883895. 9 pm. $15. 21+.

Portland Metal Winter Olympics Kickoff [COMPETITIVE BLUDGEONING] One of the reasons this little city of ours is so special is events like this. Every Thursday between Jan. 9 and the end of March, two Portland metal bands will go head-to-head in a battle of the bands-style competition at White Owl as “celebrity judges” (local writers, musicians, DJs, et al.) critique their showmanship, songcraft and “zazz.” It kicks off Thursday with Satyress and Mursam, and continues until the final showdown March 29 that will reveal the city’s best local metal act. CAT JONES. White Owl Social Club, 1305 SE 8th Ave., 236-9672. 9 pm. $2. 21+.

TOP FIVE

CONT. on page 26

by jEFF ROSEn b ER G

FIVE ESSENTIAL PATTERSON HOOD SONGS “The Living Bubba,” Gangstabilly (1998) The Drive-By Truckers’ creation myth, anchoring their debut album with the doomed but galvanizing tale of an AIDS-stricken working musician, with its determined refrain: “I’ve got another show to do.” “The Three Alabama Icons,” Southern Rock Opera (2001) Amid Act I of the band’s breakthrough “opera,” over a nearly naked three-chord riff, Hood delivers a plainspoken yet profound soliloquy about growing up Alabaman in the era of George Wallace, Bear Bryant and Ronnie Van Zant, musing on “the duality of the Southern Thing.” “Tornadoes,” The Dirty South (2004) On this song, originally written for his pre-DBT band, Adam’s House Cat, in 1988, Hood really leans into the vocal, elevating the scattershot narrative of a fearsome storm to the level of historical import, rather than soon-forgotten news fodder. “Puttin’ People on the Moon,” The Dirty South This driving rocker, from the album that’s perhaps the band’s most coherent statement, sets the title’s cliché aflame as Hood, seething with resigned rage, spits a horror story of economic and environmental catastrophe. “Drag the Lake, Charlie,” The Big To-Do (2010) The best kind of Southern Gothic death-rocker, in which the latest eruption of dysfunction and violence is as mundane a nuisance as the damn mosquitoes.

MIGRATION SONG DRIVE-BY TRUCKERS’ PATTERSON HOOD HEADS NORTHWEST FOR THE WINTER. by jEFF R OSEn b ER G

243-2122

Last year, Patterson Hood—Alabama-born, Athens, Ga.-dwelling rock-’n’-roll songwriter and de facto leader of the celebrated Drive-By Truckers— brought his wife along on a Portland visit for a solo gig and a friend’s wedding. Hood had long loved his too-brief tour stops here, and says his wife also considers it “probably her favorite city in America,” and the slightly more leisurely visit further whetted their appetites. So, “instead of the standard Christmas this year,” they decided on a family trip here. The Doug Fir Lounge obliged, booking Hood for a three-week residency. Leaving warmer climes in the midst of winter seems counterintuitive, but Hood says that’s part of the plan. “We knew it was gonna be rainy and cold,” he says, “but at some point we might want to look into living here, or having a place here, so [my wife] wanted to experience it when it wasn’t absolutely, stunningly beautiful.” Hood’s visit to Portland has otherwise featured a week laid up with a lingering cold and several days “on the phone for hours at a time with Delta,” chasing lost luggage. But he’s also had time to get acquainted with the Decemberists’ Chris Funk, a neighbor in the Clinton area where Hood is renting a house, and he looks forward to hanging out with Richmond Fontaine’s Willy Vlautin, who’s opening Hood’s first Doug Fir show Jan. 8. “I’m a huge fan of his books,” Hood says of his fellow literate Americana bandleader. Vlautin’s latest tome inspired “Pauline Hawkins,” a last-minute addition to the Truckers’ forthcoming album, English Oceans. “She’s a character in his newest book, The Free,” Hood says. “I finished the book on Saturday, wrote the song on Sunday. We’d already finished the record, we thought, but we reconvened the band about three days later, recorded and mixed it in one day, and put it on the record.” Such bursts of creativity aren’t foreign to the prolific Hood, 49, who’s written more than half the songs on the dozen albums the Truckers have

released since their 1998 debut, plus three solo collections, including last year’s Heat Lightning Rumbles in the Distance. Still, being married 10 years, with 9- and 4-year-old children, Hood struggles with other demands on his time. “When you have kids, if you don’t look like you’re busy, all of a sudden someone will put a mop in your hand, or a diaper, or a kid,” he says. Familial concerns, however, also inspire great work, like Heat Lightning’s “Leaving Time,” as good a gotta-go-on-tour tune as anyone’s written. “The kids were at an age then where they were having a little separation anxiety,” he says. “Seeing the suitcase by the door was making them upset, which therefore made my wife upset, and I wrote that song out of frustration. The kind of frustration that only your family can provoke.” Of course, a 17-year-old band like the Truckers— and a 29-year creative partnership with DBT’s lead guitarist and songwriter Mike Cooley—can spawn its own family-style frustrations, such as the contentious breakup with former member Jason Isbell, whose subsequent solo career generated one of 2013’s finest records, Southeastern. The subject of Isbell comes up while discussing “Betty Ford,” a song from Heat Lightning about addiction. “It wasn’t all happiness,” says Hood of Isbell’s tenure. “He had some demons that he had to figure out, and I wasn’t sure if he was ever going to.” As such, witnessing Isbell’s personal transformation and artistic success has been “one of the happiest things for me of the last lotta years.” Hood looks forward to a busy 2014 once he leaves Portland in late January. The new Truckers record drops in early March, spawning many more months on the road, but Hood says he’s “really excited about the upcoming touring that we’re gonna do. We had enough of a hiatus, so we really miss it. Which is a beautiful thing for a band that’s been together this long.” “At some point, I’ll probably write a book about the adventure I’ve had, ’cause there’s a great book in that,” Hood says. “But I’m still having it.” SEE IT: Patterson Hood plays Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., every Wednesday, Jan. 8-22. 9 pm. $12 advance, $14 day of show. 21+.

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

MUSIC

FRIDAY

FRIDAY, JAN. 10 Whitey Morgan & the 78s

[PURE COUNTRY GOLD] Like the best revivalists in any genre, Michigan native and country purist Whitey Morgan really doesn’t seem to know what decade it is. The two albums released along with his backing band, the 78’s—2008’s Honky Tonks and Cheap Motels and 2010’s self-titled sophomore eﬀort—are full of twangy guitars, twinkling pedal steel and vocals drawling tales of booze, jukeboxes and Buicks. There ain’t nothing “alternative” about this dude: It’s pure outlaw country so authentic you’d think he’d been trapped in the storage room of an abandoned Midwest honky-tonk since the 1970s. Come to think of it, who’s to say that isn’t the case? MATTHEW SINGER. Dante’s, 350 W Burnside St., 226-6630. 9 pm. $10. 21+.

The Builders and the Butchers, Tiburones, Old Age

LISA SCHONBERG

[BROODING FOLK] Butchers frontman Ryan Sollee has a morbid mind. The lumbering despair of the local outﬁt’s ﬁfth album, Western Medicine, exudes bewitching bloodlust and the kind of rootsy turmoil culled from Cormac McCarthy books. It squirms with Western horns and shelling drums, revved acoustic guitar and sly banjo. Though the songs dabble in more death than one would like to hear on a Friday night, Sollee’s sermonizing demands they must be heard. BRANDON WIDDER. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 2319663. 9 pm. $12. 21+.

Reel Big Fish, Suburban Legends, Mighty Mongo, the Maxies

[SKA? PUNK?] Even after more than two decades, we’re all still confused about what kind of band Reel Big Fish really is. Does its blaring trumpets and speedy drums make it punk? Does its stuck-in-the-’90s guitar riﬀs make it the steadiest collegeska band around? Seeing the band live may transport you to a sunny Californian beach with a Natty Light in hand, but it probably won’t make the answer any clearer. GEOFF NUDELMAN. Hawthorne Theatre, 1507 SE 39th Ave., 233-7100. 7:30 pm. $20 advance, $23 day of show. All ages.

Hovercraft Records Showcase: Hornet Leg, Charts, Mythological Horses, Vasas, LA Drugz, Sealion, Burnt Thrones Club

[LO-FI SOUNDTRACK] Hovercraft Records rules. Not only does it back some of the best and most raw bands in Portland, for this showcase, it’s offering a free cassette compilation to the first 250 patrons. And you can bet your firstborn that any Hovercraft compilation is going to be filled with catchy riffs and surf-rock screams. The night will feature music from eight different Hovercraft gems, from the rhythmic, bluesy punk of Hornet Leg to the 1950s prom rock of Charts. ASHLEY JOCZ. Star Theater, 13 NW 6th Ave. 8 pm. $5. 21+.

Reverend Horton Heat, Nekromantix, Old Man Markley

[PSYCHOBILLY G.O.A.T.S] Calling Texas trio Reverend Horton Heat the kings of psychobilly is both a compliment and a curse. It’s true

MIC CHECK

BY MATTHEW SINGER

LISA SCHONBERG ON THE HYLAEUS PROJECT Entomology and music aren’t exactly natural bedfellows. For Lisa Schonberg, a drummer and insect enthusiast, that was a problem. Either her research projects were being interrupted by her commitment to bands like Explode Into Colors, or her ecology jobs were leaving her feeling creatively stifled. In 2013, she finally decided to combine the two: On a grant from Portland’s Regional Arts & Culture Council, she and artist Aidan Koch spent a month in Hawaii studying the islands’ native and increasingly rare Hylaeus bees for an illustrated book and a set of compositions for her Secret Drum Band directly inspired by the habitats she visited. WW asked her to describe how that translates musically. “Sometimes it’s actually direct samples of soundscapes. There’s this one place we stayed at, where there were these Coqui frogs that are native to Puerto Rico who’ve become established in this one part of the Big Island, and they’re all you hear at night. It’s crazy. It’s kind of beautiful but kind of intense at the same time. So I recorded that, and one of the pieces draws on that a lot. It features samples from that, but I also sat there and thought about how I could interpret it rhythmically. Another specific example, we were at this other site that is a really good habitat for the bees, and there were these cicadas calling at night, and the way their calls came in and out and stacked on each other, the patterns inspired a piece where [the calls] were represented by four different people on snare drums with rolls. “I’m just really interested in this idea of looking at a place and what’s going on ecologically through sounds. The Coqui frogs in that one place are an introduced organism that’s kind of taken over. They’ve replaced things that would be there, and you can tell just by listening what’s going on.” SEE IT: The Hylaeus Party, featuring the Secret Drum Band, Dubais, Marisa Anderson and DJ Allan Wilson, is at Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison St., on Sunday, Jan. 12. 8:30 pm. $6. 21+.

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

FRIDAY–SATURDAY

Ozarks, Supercrow, Snowblind Traveler

[BAROQUE POP] Ozarks’ billowing chamber pop is so dreamy it can be hard to make out at times. But somewhere in that soothing haze is frontman Robbie Augspurger and his prowess for low ﬁdelity. The Portland band released an EP and a self-titled LP in 2012, both of which demonstrate an act ever eager to fuse classical instrumentation with ’60s rock. Picture a bedroom version of the Kinks and you’ll begin to understand what Augspurger and company are up to. The show is sponsored by Portland radio station KZME. MARK STOCK. Kelly’s Olympian, 426 SW Washington St., 228-3669. 9 pm. $5. 21+.

Brent Spiner

[TO BOLDLY CROON] As true believers gather to cheer on yet another vintage-tinted vanity tour showcasing the hobbyist passions of a screen icon lately skimming the Great American Songbook, any critical assessment of the sort typically applied to professional musicians feels unfair. It’s certain to be instantly subsumed by towering waves of uncomplicated adoration such as that which the Schnitzer crowds showered upon Molly Ringwald’s 2013 torch songs and Hugh Laurie’s 2012 blues stylings. Some celebrities accumulate emotional investments of such magnitude that their very pres-

CONT. on page 28

FEATURE KEVIN WRIGHT

that no one else has mastered the genre’s amphetamine cocktail of punk thrash ‘n’ gnash and countriﬁed twang with as much precision as the trio of guitarist-sermonizer Jim Heath, bassist Jimbo Wallace and whoever happens to be sitting behind the drum kit on a given tour. But being considered the cream of such a small niche-crop means ruling from the margins. And that’s a shame, because the reality is the band understands rock ’n’ roll—period—better than most. No matter, though: the Rev has already charged through damn near 30 years of cultdom with a rowdy, ear-blasting live show, and though it hasn’t issued a new studio album since 2009’s Laughin’ and Cryin’ with the Reverend Horton Heat, in terms of its road-warrior status, it doesn’t look like the band will be drawing back any time soon. MATTHEW SINGER. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., 2848686. 8 pm. $22 advance, $25 day of show. 21+.

MUSIC

SATURDAY, JAN. 11 The Tubes

[SHTICK ROCK] What would a postmillennial version of the Tubes have become? Fee Waybill and the boys likely ended up a rock band as consequence of their era—rock ‘n’ roll, alongside sex and kung fu, one of the few growth industries of 1970s America—and they’ve spent a long career highlighting a detachment from the genre proper. While at least Steely Dan and Zappa assembled something new atop scavenged FM fundamentals, the Tubes wasted their relevant years slathering anthemic instincts in theatrical spectacle and instrumental snark for the sort of rabid devotees (think prog Parrotheads) who prize cleverness above all else in their favored pop. The diehards attending their umpteenth Tubes concert may claim they’re supporting musicianship above nostalgia, but, while ﬂourishes of smug virtuosity survive with rather more dignity than extended parodies of tour decadence, both unfunny satire and its fans age poorly. JAY HORTON. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave., 234-9694. 8 pm. $30. Under 21 permitted with legal guardian.

1939 Ensemble, Grammies, Like a Villain

[DRUM ’N’ SAX] Following in the footsteps of the great Golden Retriever, local duo Grammies makes quite the weird racket with a treated woodwind instrument. Led by saxophonist Noah Bernstein— who also plays with Shy Girls and is a former touring member of Tune-Yards—and percussionist Dan Sutherland, Grammies’ instrumental chaos is a crazy mind-meld of squawks, squeaks and lockstep grooves that are more J Dilla than jazz drummer. This is music best appreciated live, when you can fully embrace these two dudes’ commitment to creating new jazz/ hip-hop/noise standards. MICHAEL MANNHEIMER. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 231-9663. 9 pm. $10 advance, $12 day of show. 21+.

Verified: Swizzymack, Gang$ign$, BennyRox, Quarry

[PHILLY CLUB] As a genre, “Philly club” is less a sibling than a slightly botched clone of its neighbors in Baltimore and Jersey. All three can be triangulated somewhere between trap, Miami bass and juke, but the names say it all: This is 100 percent club-floor-focused. Swizzymack has taken the reins of Philly club, adding in his trademark stutter. Bass EP, released last year on Mad Decent spinoff imprint Jeffree’s, is three tracks of straight twerk-juice, with “Drip” being the most focused and delightfully bouncy. Just don’t forget a towel. MITCH LILLIE. Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison St., 2397639. 10 pm. $8. 21+.

STEWART VILLAIN

SCENE REPORT: HIP-HOP Portland and its hip-hop scene have not always gotten along. Over the years, local rappers have faced scrutiny from a number of sources, who aren’t always eager to support music that paints their hometown in a different light. Of course, that’s one of the reasons the scene is important—to give voice to people living in neighborhoods beyond the brewpubs and bike lanes. But its merit also lies in the fact that it has produced some damn good records. 2014 should continue that trend. That includes familiar names like Vinnie Dewayne, whose poignant lyricism paints a gritty picture of the St. Johns area, and trio TxE, which cleverly brought together the city’s indie-rock and hip-hop worlds with its latest album, TxE vs. PRTLND. But there are also a number of young, bright MCs still flying below the radar, despite dropping stellar projects recently. One is producer-rapper Stewart Villain, whose latest project, No Manners, captivated with trap-influenced beats and hardhitting rhymes. The 24-year-old Gresham native has already produced records for big artists like Danny Brown and Smoke DZA, and he should soon add more names to that list. Villain’s versatility behind the boards allows him to craft all kinds of instrumentals, from Detroit neo-soul to electro-pop. Elsewhere, Mic Capes, Glenn Waco and Rasheed Jamal, who perform both solo and together under the moniker the Resistance, are building a buzz through their ferocious brand of lyricism. Mic Capes is especially good at dropping one-liners that cause faces to scrunch up in pleasurable disgust. If you like that feeling, also check out Northeast duo Load B, which more than likely blew out quite a few trunk speakers last summer with its aptly named, 40-ounce-fueled album Debauchery. Sadly, whenever Portland MCs starts making some serious noise, there’s a risk they’ll move to a bigger market. Villain is contemplating it, and Luck-One, arguably the city’s most consistent rapper of the past five years, has already moved to New York. You can’t blame them: Most other major cities have a better relationship with their hip-hop scenes. But with more talent than ever flowing through Portland’s, things will hopefully soon start to change. REED JACKSON.

The Portland MCs melting mics in 2014.

This is the second in a series of features on local artists to watch in 2014. Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

SATURDAY DUSDIN CONDREN

MUSIC THURSDAY, JANUARY 9

7pm. 21 & Over Pre-Show reading CARI LUNA KEVIN SAMPSELL DENA RASH GUZMAN JUSTIN MAURER Free! Four writers cure your winter blues and seasonal affective disorders with some heartwarming and titillating stories. 9pm. All Ages lunch record release LA DRUGZ LUNCH WOUNDS FRIDAY, JANUARY 10 8pm. 21 & Over Get it on! Presents... HALF WAY THERE DOGS OF AUGUST A BLINDING SILENCE BUSY SCISSORS THIS FAIR CITY $8.00 at the door. SATURDAY, JANUARY 11 8pm. All Ages RABBITS GAYTHEIST JONNY X & THE GROADIES POLST THE GOUT $5.00 at the door. SUNDAY, JANUARY 12 6pm. 21 & Over Grand Style orchestra Free! 8pm. All Ages Portland Poetry Slam

Falafel House: 3 to Late–Night All Ages Shows: Every Sunday 8–11pm Free Pinball Feeding Frenzy: Saturday @ 3pm WITHIN SPITTING DISTANCE OF THE PEARL

1033 NW 16TH AVE. (971) 229-1455 OPEN: 3–2:30AM EVERY DAY

HAPPY HOUR: MON–FRI NOON–7PM PoP-A-Shot • PinbAll • Skee-bAll Air hockey • Free Wi-Fi

AMERICAN MOSS: Califone plays Mississippi Studios on Thursday, Jan. 9. ence overwhelms all else. While Brent Spiner never approached anything beyond a niche cultural resonance during the early ‘90s height of Star Trek ’s second iteration, his portrayal of twinkly android Data justiﬁ ed emotional unavailability for a proudly solipsistic generation. This evening’s awkward blend of Q&A with musical theater seems rather desperately targeted to the nerd faithful, and however limited Spiner’s vocals and inane his ambitions may appear over a scant discography, they’ll likely never more enjoy the cabaret. JAY HORTON. Roseland Theater, 8 NW 6th Ave., 224-2038. 7 pm. $20-$32.

Thrones, Survival Knife, Daniel Menche, DJ Dennis Dread

[BASS OF DEATH] It’s a commendable feat for anyone to make a musical project last 20 years, but it’s especially worth celebrating when it’s a one-man show featuring Joe Preston, aka Salty Green, one of the Paciﬁ c Northwest’s most renowned bassists. His talents have landed him a spot in legendary heavy bands like the Melvins, Earth, High on Fire, and SunnO))) over the years. Thrones began as a way for Preston to continue being creative after parting ways with the Melvins, but has since become a doom-noise institution both at home and abroad. CAT JONES. Rotture, 315 SE 3rd Ave., 2345683. 9 pm. $8. 21+.

Rabbits, Gaytheist, Jonny X & the Groadies, Polst, the Gout

[HEAVY-METAL KIDS] The battle for the ages still rages. If you’re under 21 and complaining about your lack of options, here is the perfect show to usher in an ugly new year. There may be few

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

opportunities for the underaged to see the best of Portland ’s metal masters, so please, kids, take advantage. And honestly, what West Hills mother wouldn’t want her children to be serenaded by the electro-party black metal of a pack of Groadies, the self-explanatory messaging of Gaytheist or the misanthropic sludge of Rabbits? Just be home by midnight, or there will be hell to pay! NATHAN CARSON. Slabtown, 1033 NW 16th Ave., 223-0099. 8 pm. $5. All ages.

Old Russian New Year: Chervona

[PARTY FOLK] After centuries of miscounted leap years, the Julian calendar has pushed Russia’s oﬃ cial religious New Year well into January. Religion being optional in Russia, the Old New Year is just an excuse for many Russians to break out leftovers from the ﬁ rst New Year’s and procure more vodka—and not think too much about the blatant contradiction of “old new” staring them in the face. But, hell, you already know that, because rambunctious folkparty rockers Chervona have been throwing their confusing but accurate Old New Year celebration for seven years now. It’s wild, it’s sweaty and it’s even partially sung in Russian. MITCH LILLIE. Star Theater, 13 NW 6th Ave. 8 pm. $20. 21+.

UFOFBI, the Woolen Men, Spookies [BEYONDER ROCK] The conﬂ uence of sucrose confections and scuzzy uncaring is this bill’s hallmark. Stockholm’s UFOFBI skirts the No Wave tag, but just barely. Tracks from the group’s Dreamtrash Dreamtrash tape, being issued through Peter Larsson’s imprint, still sound like the trio might occasionally beat the shit out of a garbage

SATURDAY–MONDAY/CLASSICAL, ETC. can for inspiration. But a pop proclivity shoots through the songs, matching them well with locals Woolen Men and Spookies, that pair celebrating the release of a split single tonight. And despite the latter ensemble counting a few dudes from the Shaky Hands, there’s a rough-hewn garage sound emanating from this new troupe. Larsson’s ﬁ lm works are scheduled to accompany the performance. DAVE CANTOR. The Know, 2026 NE Alberta St., 473-8729. 8 pm. $8. 21+.

Thao and the Get Down Stay Down, Sonny and the Sunsets

[ECCENTRIC FOLK POP] The thing about Thao and the Get Down Stay Down is the music almost goes where you would expect it to—and then it doesn’t. Herein lies the dare-you-not-to-smile charm of the band, which released its third full-length album, We the Common, early last year. On it you’ll fi nd a smorgasbord of diff erent styles, with elements of jazz, country and folk pop mixed with quirky keyboards, bursts of various horns, bright banjo and sometimes-heavy electric guitar. While all these sounds have the potential to become too much to handle at once, they somehow manage to remain well-placed spotlights on the creative lyrics and sweet, emotive vocal delivery from Thao Nguyen that made the band famous in the fi rst place. KAITIE TODD. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., 284-8686. 9 pm. $15$30. 21+.

SUNDAY, JAN. 12 Maria Taylor, St. Even, PJ Bond

[SINGER-SONGWRITER] Steve Hefter came to Portland in 2009 from Baltimore, and two years later, under the name St. Even, released a quietly stunning album of lyrical chamber-pop called Spirit Animal. It didn’t really catch on locally, something that astounded my predecessor, WW Music Editor, Casey Jarman. This week, Hefter celebrates the digital release of his latest self-titled collection on Jarman’s Party Damage Records. Again, it’s a delicate, warmly arranged set. His songs seem to drift downward, the gently plucked acoustic guitars, wilting horns, strings and occasional barroom piano appearing to falling around Hefter’s congested, heavy-lidded murmur like leaves in winter. It is, perhaps, too unassuming to make St. Even the next big thing in local music, but that’s OK. For those in the know, the music doesn’t need hype to prop it up. It stands on its own. Beguiling singer-songwriter Maria Taylor, half of dreamy Georgian duo Azure Ray, headlines. MATTHEW SINGER. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 8 pm. $12. 21+.

The Know’s 9th Anniversary: Graves at Sea, the Siege Fire

[CELEBRATORY DEATH METAL] If you’re “in the know”—ahem— some part of you is probably aware that the Know is one of the coolest small venues on the West Coast. With agreeably low drink prices, cheap shows and an eclectic range of acts keeping the venue toasty practically every day of the week, the Know is a staple of the Portland music scene. It is celebrating its ninth anniversary with some death metal, courtesy of Hellshock, Graves at Sea, and the Siege Fire. Here’s to nine more years of bookers keeping the place hip and bartenders keeping the place beered! ASHLEY JOCZ. The Know, 2026 NE Alberta St., 473-8729. 8 pm. $8. 21+.

MONDAY, JAN. 13 Carcrashlander, Graves

Carcrashlander, but that doesn’t mean Cory Gray has just been sitting around in his basement playing Xbox. Quite the opposite: Just in the last year, dude toured with the Dandy Warhols and recorded with Shelley Short, while playing a one-off reunion gig with Norfolk & Western and producing records from numerous diff erent acts. In between all that, Gray found time to make A Plan to Tell the Future, his fi rst Carcrashlander album since 2010’s You Were Born in a Hospital EP. Actually, he literally recorded in between sessions for the other bands he was producing, at Scenic Burrows in Goose Hollow. It’s a free-fl owing, largely unplanned exploration of sound inspired, Gray says, by the likes of Sun Ra, Captain Beefheart, Lee Hazlewood “and maybe even a little Nick Cave.” The result is a drizzly, atmospheric collection, occasionally jarred awake by eruptions of guitars and synths. MATTHEW SINGER. Valentine’s, 232 SW Ankeny St., 248-1600. 9:30 pm. Free. 21+.

CLASSICAL, JAZZ & WORLD Rovshan Mamedkuliev

[CLASSICAL GUITAR] Winner of last year’s Guitar Foundation of America’s International Concert Artist Competition, the young Azerbaijani Rovshan Mamedkuliev (still in graduate school) has earned awards and audiences— and a new album on Naxos. The success is not just for his chops but also by his programming of contemporary composers (and not necessarily the big names)— including one of his teachers, Leo Brouwer, along with the classics by Spanish composers. This solo recital is a chance to catch one of tomorrow’s stars. BRETT CAMPBELL. Marylhurst University, 17600 Highway 43, 699-1814. 8 pm Friday, Jan. 10. $30-$49.

Alasdair Fraser, Natalie Haas

[SCOTTISH STRINGS] Long considered among the fi nest Scottish fi ddlers (with the awards to prove it), Alasdair Fraser has been based in Northern California for a couple decades now. It’s there he’s led a revival of Scottish fi ddling, includ-

MUSIC

ing running a school that teaches it. He also maintains a varied performing career with his band Skye, making guest appearances with various bands, on movie soundtracks, in dance concerts and with his cellist protégée, Natalie Haas. Their skilled duets of traditional and original tunes and their wellhoned musical rapport and stage banter make their concerts among the most enjoyable in the longrunning Gaelic revival. BRETT CAMPBELL. Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St., 719-6055. 8 pm Saturday, Jan. 11. $22.

Bach and Strauss: Emanuel Ax, Oregon Symphony

[CAREFUL WITH THAT AX] Master pianist Emanuel Ax joins the Oregon Symphony in a program of baroque classics from Bach, Strauss and Beethoven. Ax is on the faculty at Juilliard, and has won a slew of awards over a lifetime that led him from postwar Ukraine to Poland to Winnipeg and eventually to his longtime home in New York. From that base, Ax has been a friend and collaborator to Yo-Yo Ma. The two have earned ﬁ ve Grammys together, and Ax has two to his own credit as a soloist. It won’t be a challenging program, but it will be masterful. NATHAN CARSON. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 248-4335. 7:30 pm Saturday, 2 pm Sunday, 8 pm Monday, Jan. 12-14. $27-$71.

Berber New Year

[NORTH AFRICAN CELEBRATION] The Berber people, who range across North Africa (mostly Algeria and Morocco), have created some of the world ’s most electrifying music, whether Tuareg, Kabyle or lesser-known strains. Portland now boasts a contingent of Berber musicians, and some of them—Moh Alileche, Cherif and David, Lamiae Naki—are teaming with other local world-music masters Nat Hulskamp and Hurqalya, dancer Danielle Elizabeth and guest speakers for this celebration of the new year. That’s 2964, of course. The Berbers got a head start. BRETT CAMPBELL. The Old Church, 1422 SW 11th Ave., 222-2031. 6 pm Saturd ay, Jan. 11. Free.

ALBUM REVIEW

SUMMER CANNIBALS MAKE YOU BETTER EP (NEW MOSS) [MOSS ROCK] W hen Summer Cannibals released their first full-length, No Makeup, last summer, it was clear the quartet had high ambitions. While the album had plenty of skuzzy guitars, powerful drums and rugged vocals, it also had a certain polish that made it listenable for fans of more mainstream indie rock. Since then, the band has recorded Make You Better, an EP that takes an interesting step away from No Makeup. The four tracks retain Cannibals’ buzzing harmonies and chugging guitars, but add a distinct layer of aggression that wasn’t around on the debut. Vocalist Jessica Boudreaux sings with a little more urgency and ferocity. The band’s new rhythm section of bassist Lynnae Gryffi n and Valerie Brogden on drums sends the band hurtling in the proper direction, especially on the stomping title track. Even more than on No Makeup, the songs on this EP feel perfectly placed, and display a maturation in the punk-garage sound the Cannibals are increasingly becoming known for. With the band on the rise, Make You Better is a great next move. GEOFF NUDELMAN. SEE IT: Summer Cannibals play Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., with Hurry Up and Spookies, on Thursday, Jan. 9. 9 pm. $5. 21+.

[AFTER-HOURS FOLK] It’s about four years since we last heard from

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

WWEEK.COM MOBILE SITE

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

• BREAKING NEWS • GEO-LOCATING BAR AND RESTAURANT REVIEWS • CITY GUIDES

MUSIC CALENDAR

[JAN. 8–14] east end

= WW Pick. Highly recommended. Editor: Mitch Lillie. TO HAVE YOUR EVENT LISTED, send show information at least two weeks in advance on the web at wweek.com/submitevents or (if you book a specific venue) enter your events at dbmonkey. com/wweek. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: music@wweek.com. For more listings, check out wweek.com.

203 SE Grand Ave. Love Cop, Sea Lions, Psychomagic

Goodfoot Lounge 2845 SE Stark St. High Beamz

Ivories Jazz Lounge and Restaurant

ADRIAN LANDON BROOkS

1435 NW Flanders St. Tom Grant, Marilyn Keller

Jade Lounge

Tiger Bar

317 NW Broadway Karaoke From Hell

Tonic Lounge

3100 NE Sandy Blvd. Die Like Gentlemen, WHIPCORD, Humours

Vie de Boheme

1530 SE 7th Ave. John Bennett Band

West Cafe

2346 SE Ankeny St. Christopher John Mead

1201 SW Jefferson St. Alan Jones Academy Jazz Jam

Kenton Club

White eagle Saloon

2025 N Kilpatrick St. The Century, No Good Lovers, Surfs Drugs

Landmark Saloon

4847 SE Division St. The Pickups

836 N Russell St. Ojos Feos

White Owl Social Club 1305 SE 8th Ave. Portland Metal Winter Olympics Kickoff

Laughing Horse Books 12 NE 10th Ave. Fugue, Canyons, the Sky Above and the Earth Below

LaurelThirst

2958 NE Glisan St. Ridgerunners: Jim Boyer, Lynn Conover, Dan Haley (9:30 pm); Old Flames (6 pm)

Lodge

6605 SE Powell Blvd Ben Rice B3 Trio

McMenamins edgefield

2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Sonny Hess Trio

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern

10000 Old Cornelius Pass Road, Hillsboro The Local Strangers

McMenamins Kennedy School 5736 NE 33rd Ave. Brothers and Sister

Mississippi Pizza

alberta Street Public House

3552 N Mississippi Ave. Happy Otherwise: Josie Johnson, Lee Ellen Reed (9 pm); Mo Phillips, Johnny and Jason (6 pm)

andina

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Califone, the Luyas

THe THaO OF nOW: Thao and the Get down Stay down plays Wonder Ballroom on Saturday, Jan. 11.

Wed. Jan. 8 al’s den at the Crystal Hotel 303 SW 12th Ave. Samantha Crain

alberta Street Public House 1036 NE Alberta St. Typsy Ramblers

amadeus Manor

2122 SE Sparrow St., Milwaukie Open Mic

andina

1314 NW Glisan St. Toshi Onizuka

ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. Here From Apathy, Stepper, Lights Demise

Branx

320 SE 2nd Ave. Bobby Meader, Calmosa, Nothin Like You, The Problem Of Evil, Eric Howard

eastBurn

1800 E Burnside St. Bodacious

Goodfoot Lounge 2845 SE Stark St. Shafty

Ground Kontrol

511 NW Couch St. TRONix: Popcorn, Mixed Signals

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. Patrick Lamb, Jeff Lorber

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Friendship Camp, Lahontan Cutthroat, Race of Strangers

Landmark Saloon

4847 SE Division St. Jake Ray and the Cowdogs (9 pm); Miller and Sasser’s Twelve Dollar Band (6 pm)

LaurelThirst

626 SW Park Ave. John Teply

2958 NE Glisan St. Tree Top Tribe, the Colin Trio (9:30 pm); Scott Law (6 pm)

dante’s

Lents Commons

Brasserie Montmartre

350 W Burnside St. Wanderlust Social: Wanderlust Circus Orchestra, Eric Stern, Keph Sherin

doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Patterson Hood, Willy Vlautin

east end

203 SE Grand Ave. Ethereal and the Queer Show, the Vliets, Analog Mistress

9201 SE Foster Road Open Mic

Lodge

6605 SE Powell Blvd Pete Ford Band Jam

Lola’s Room at the Crystal Ballroom 1332 W Burnside St. Get Rhythm

McMenamin’s edgefield

2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Paul Basile

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern

10000 Old Cornelius Pass Road, Hillsboro Billy D

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Lucy Wainwright Roche

O’Connor’s Vault 7850 SW Capitol Highway Dave Fleschner

The analog

720 SE Hawthorne Jason Demains Singer Songwriter Showcase

The Blue diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd. The Fenix Project

The elixir Lab

2738 NE Alberta St. Open Mic Nite

Tony Starlight’s

3728 NE Sandy Blvd. Piano Bar: Bo Ayars

Wilfs Restaurant & Bar

800 NW 6th Ave. Ron Steen, Dr. Watson, Nurses of Bebop

THuRS. Jan. 9 al’s den at the Crystal Hotel 303 SW 12th Ave. Samantha Crain

alberta Rose Theatre 3000 NE Alberta St. Red Molly, Anne & Pete

1036 NE Alberta St. The Lonesomes, Sarah Gwen 1314 NW Glisan St. Jason Okamoto

andrea’s Cha Cha Club

832 SE Grand Ave. Pilon D’Azucar Salsa Band

artichoke Community Music 3130A SE Hawthorne Blvd. Acoustic Village

ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. Pink Slip, Life Well Wasted, the D*Maggs, Sugar Tits

Brasserie Montmartre 626 SW Park Ave. Paul Paresa and the People

Camellia Lounge

510 NW 11th Ave. Sandy Dennison Trio

Chapel Pub

430 N Killingsworth St. Steve Kerin

Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St. Martha Davis & the Motels, Animotion, Tommy Tutone

doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Summer Cannibals, Hurry Up!, Spookies

duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. In the Pocket

Mississippi Studios

Mock Crest Tavern

3435 N Lombard St. Claes of the Blueprints

Muddy Rudder Public House 8105 SE 7th Ave. Stumbleweed

Music Millennium

3158 E Burnside St. Emily Asher

Rock Bottom Brewery 206 SW Morrison St. Urban Sub All Stars

Sellwood Public House 8132 SE 13th Ave. Open Mic

Sky Club at ankeny’s Well

50 SW 3rd Ave. Soundscape Thursdays: Julius Major, Final Frequency, Ryan Frakes, PIA!!

Slabtown

1033 NW 16th Ave. LA Drugz, Lunch, Wounds

The Blue diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd. Ben Jones

The Blue Monk

3341 SE Belmont St. Joey Beats Brady, Laryssa Birdseye, Amenta Abioto

The Tillicum

8585 SW BeavertonHillsdale Highway Mojoblasters

FRI. Jan. 10 al’s den at the Crystal Hotel 303 SW 12th Ave. Samantha Crain

alberta Street Public House

1036 NE Alberta St. Big Haunt, Adam Brock, Steff and the Articles

andina

1314 NW Glisan St. Dan Diresta Quartet

artichoke Community Music 3130A SE Hawthorne Blvd. Friday Coffeehouse

ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. The Charlie Darwins, Common Dear

Bamboo Grove Salon

134 SE Taylor St. Nikki N’ the Pathos, Sean Wagner, Olive Delsol

Beaterville Cafe

2201 N Killingsworth St. Betty Moss

Biddy McGraw’s Irish Pub

Jade Lounge

2346 SE Ankeny St. Chris Juhlin

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. Naomi LaViolette, Matt Brown

Katie O’Briens

2809 NE Sandy Blvd. MDC, Matt Danger, Mr.plow, Omar Cripps (Punch Cancer in the Face benefit)

Kells Brewpub

210 NW 21st Ave. Sami Rouisi

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. No Passenger, Mbrascatu

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St. DJ Bar Hopper

Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave. Hovercraft Records Showcase: Hornet Leg, Charts, Mythological Horses, Vasas, LA Drugz, Sealion, Burnt Thrones Club

Starday Tavern

6517 SE Foster Rd. Steven “Pearly” Hettum and the Janglers

The analog

720 SE Hawthorne Voltaire, Murdergate

The Blue diamond

Kenton Club

2016 NE Sandy Blvd. The Headhunters

Landmark Saloon

1937 SE 11th Ave. The Dandelyons, Tango Alpha Tango, Mike Coykendall

2025 N Kilpatrick St. The Darlin Brothers, Task River Redemption, Damn Family

The Firkin Tavern

4847 SE Division St. Davy Jay Sparrow and His Western Song Birds (9 pm); Sam Yale Country Band (6 pm)

The Tillicum

LaurelThirst

3100 NE Sandy Blvd. Israelites, Longshots, Cool Smoke

2958 NE Glisan St. Denim Wedding, Carrie Clark & the Lonesome Lovers (9:30 pm); Joe McMurrian & Woodbrain (6 pm)

McMenamin’s edgefield

2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Bon Shatters

8585 SW BeavertonHillsdale Highway Madame Torment

Tonic Lounge

Tony Starlight’s

3728 NE Sandy Blvd. The Bureau of Standards Big Band

Vie de Boheme 1530 SE 7th Ave. Quadraphonnes

White eagle Saloon

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern

836 N Russell St. Garcia Birthday Band

Mississippi Pizza

800 NW 6th Ave. Randy Porter Trio

10000 Old Cornelius Pass Road, Hillsboro Three For Silver 3552 N Mississippi Ave. Get Rhythm Johnny Cash Tribute, Matty Charles (9 pm); Whiskey Puppy (6 pm)

Wilfs Restaurant & Bar

Wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St. Reverend Horton Heat, Nekromantix, Old Man Markley

Mississippi Studios

6000 NE Glisan St. Fire Weeds

3939 N Mississippi Ave. The Sale, Groovy Wallpaper, Tony Smiley

Brasserie Montmartre

Mock Crest Tavern

al’s den at the Crystal Hotel

Buffalo Gap eatery and Saloon

Moda Center

aladdin Theater

626 SW Park Ave. Trash Can Joe

6835 SW Macadam Ave. Midnight Moonshine

Camellia Lounge

510 NW 11th Ave. Adlai Alexander, Andre St. James

Club 21

2035 NE Glisan St. Sex Crime

dante’s

350 W Burnside St. Whitey Morgan & the 78s

doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. The Builders and the Butchers, Tiburones, Old Age

duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. Shorty and the Mustangs, Roseland Hunters

3435 N Lombard St. Edewaard

1401 N Wheeler Ave. The Roadshow: Skillet, Third Day, Andy Mineo, Jamie Grace, Royal Taylor

nel Centro

1408 SW 6th Ave. Mike Pardew, John Stowell

noho’s Hawaiian Cafe 4627 NE Fremont St. Hawaiian Music

Original Halibut’s II 2527 NE Alberta St. Louis Pain

Ponderosa Lounge at Jubitz Truckstop

10350 N Vancouver Way Michele Drey & the Branded Band

Rock Bottom Brewery 206 SW Morrison St. Beth Willis

east end

Secret Society Ballroom

Hawthorne Theatre

Shaker and Vine

203 SE Grand Ave. We Miss the Earth, Havania Whaal, Here Come Dots 1507 SE 39th Ave. Reel Big Fish, Suburban Legends, Mighty Mongo, the Maxies

Ivories Jazz Lounge and Restaurant 1435 NW Flanders St. David Valdez, Weber Iago

116 NE Russell St. RAF, Kinked, the Silver Fox, Pete Krebs & His Portland Playboys 2929 SE Powell Blvd. The Julians

Slabtown

1033 NW 16th Ave. Half Way There, Dogs of August, A Blinding Silence, Marca Luna, Busy Scissors

SaT. Jan. 11 303 SW 12th Ave. Samantha Crain

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. The Tubes

alberta Street Public House 1036 NE Alberta St. The Lonesome Billies, Travesura

alhambra Theatre

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Kellen Asebroek, Sean O’neil, Tyler Thompson, Kina Lyn Muir, Matt Franzen, Ben Larsen, Sean Badders (Neil Young tribute)

andina

1314 NW Glisan St. Toshi Onizuka Trio

artichoke Community Music 3130A SE Hawthorne Blvd. Adrian Martin

ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. The Big Cover Up: Lucifer’s Child, Samhell, Motley Crude, Demon Teds Are Go, Joy Revision

Beaterville Cafe

2201 N Killingsworth St. Matthew Lindley

Biddy McGraw’s Irish Pub 6000 NE Glisan St. Mexican Gunfight, the Marvins

CONT. on page 32 Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

MUSIC CALENDAR

BAR SPOTLIGHT

Buffalo Gap Eatery and Saloon 6835 SW Macadam Ave. Jive Coulis

Camellia Lounge

510 NW 11th Ave. Anandi Gefroh, Robert Moore

JEREK HOLLENDER

Brasserie Montmartre 626 SW Park Ave. Sidestreet Reny

JAN. 8–14

Club 21

2035 NE Glisan St. Spanish Galleons, Lovesores, the Underlings

Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St. Last Chance Winter Dance: Radical Revolution

Dante’s

350 W Burnside St. Joey Porter (Stevie Wonder tribute)

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. 1939 Ensemble, Grammies, Like a Villain

Duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. Strange Tones

EastBurn

1800 E Burnside St. Flor de Cana

Foggy Notion

3416 N Lombard St. Long Hallways, Appendixes, Months

Gemini Lounge

6526 SE Foster Road Amber Harlan Granmo

Goodfoot Lounge

2845 SE Stark St. Eldridge Gravy & Court Supreme, Funky to Death

Hawthorne Theatre

1507 SE 39th Ave. American Roulette, Chronological Injustice, Kingdom Under Fire, Cast DowN, Cry Havok

Ivories Jazz Lounge and Restaurant 1435 NW Flanders St. Garden Party Tribute to Hoagy Carmichael: Emily Asher

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. David Pack

Kells Brewpub

210 NW 21st Ave. Sami Rouisi

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Ozarks, Supercrow, Snowblind Traveler

Kenton Club

2025 N Kilpatrick St. Manx, Bubble Cats, Noble Firs

Landmark Saloon

4847 SE Division St. The Redeemed (9 pm); Rose City Rattlers (6 pm)

LaurelThirst

2958 NE Glisan St. Cats Under The Stars (9:30 pm); Sassparilla (6 pm)

McMenamin’s Edgefield 2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Peter Pants

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern 10000 Old Cornelius Pass Road, Hillsboro John Bunzow

McMenamins’ Kennedy School 5736 NE 33rd Ave. Happy Birthday J.R.R. Tolkien: Garcia Birthday Band

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave. Vagabond Opera (9 pm); Lorna Miller for kids (6 pm)

Mock Crest Tavern 3435 N Lombard St. Missi & Mr. Baker

Music Millennium

3158 E Burnside St. The Land of the Living

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

TEST THE WATERS: The intersection of Northeast Killingsworth Street and 30th Avenue hardly needs another culinary contender: That corner is already home to Cocotte, Beast, Expatriate, DOC and Yakuza. But now comes Wilder (5501 NE 30th Ave., 704-8332, wilderpdx.tumblr.com), a homey little bar more interested in maple buttermilk pie, kale Caesar salad and a local-leaning tap list (on a recent visit, only one of the eight offerings wasn’t from Oregon) than in ethically iffy foie gras or distantly sourced seafood. The space feels vaguely nautical, with glass fishing floats arranged on the bar, walls either slatted with unfinished wood or painted cerulean blue, and a tangle of driftwood dangling above the front door. Might the aquatic theme have something to do with owner Raquel Bournhonesque’s position with Upstream Public Health, the lobbying group that campaigned to fluoridate Portland’s water? The jury is still out, but I saw no mention of that cavity-preventing mineral on the cocktail menu, which instead favors twists on classic drinks—there are four variations on the Old Fashioned, including a “Scotchy-Scotch” version in homage to Ron Burgundy—and ingredients like organic grenadine. Try the Macho Pisco ($9): It’s a bit like a pisco sour, with pineapple gum syrup adding brightness and body. If anyone asks, I’ll take mine with fluoride. REBECCA JACOBSON. Nel Centro

1408 SW 6th Ave. Mike Pardew, Dave Captein, Randy Rollofson

Noho’s Hawaiian Cafe 4627 NE Fremont St. Hawaiian Music

Original Halibut’s II 2527 NE Alberta St. Jim Mesi

Ponderosa Lounge at Jubitz Truckstop

10350 N Vancouver Way Country Wide

Red and Black Cafe

400 SE 12th Ave. Hang the Old Year, Intentional Overtones, Golden Hour

Rock Bottom Brewery 206 SW Morrison St. Ken Hanson

Rotture

315 SE 3rd Ave. Thrones, Survival Knife, Daniel Menche, DJ Dennis Dread

Secret Society Ballroom 116 NE Russell St. Three For Silver, Will Kimbrough, Bergerette, Trashcan Joe

Slabtown

The Blue Monk

3341 SE Belmont St. J Burns, the Feel Good, Gutter Mob Family, Kid Conscious, Rey Totem

The Conga Club

4923 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., Suite 102 Tropical Saturday Salsa

The Firkin Tavern

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. Andy McKee, Cris Lucas

Andina

The Know

1037 SW Broadway Bach and Strauss: Emanuel Ax, Oregon Symphony

2026 NE Alberta St. UFOFBI, the Woolen Men, Spookies

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Volt Divers

The Tillicum

8585 SW BeavertonHillsdale Highway Bottleneck Blues Band

Tonic Lounge

3100 NE Sandy Blvd. Tracii Guns with Andrew Freeman

Tony Starlight’s

3728 NE Sandy Blvd. Tony Starlight’s 7th Anniversary Show

Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave. Old Russian New Year: Chervona

836 N Russell St. The Local Strangers, Strangled Darlings, Moody Little Sister

The Analog

Wilfs Restaurant & Bar

2016 NE Sandy Blvd. Bill Rhoades & The Party Kings

Aladdin Theater

1314 NW Glisan St. Danny Romero

Vie de Boheme

The Blue Diamond

303 SW 12th Ave. Ben Darwish

1937 SE 11th Ave. Fanno Creek, Tiger House, Talkative (PALS Fest Fundraiser)

1033 NW 16th Ave. Rabbits, Gaytheist, Jonny X & the Groadies, Polst, the Gout

720 SE Hawthorne Tounge & Groove, Grand Royal

SUN. JAN. 12 Al’s Den at the Crystal Hotel

1530 SE 7th Ave. Soul Vaccination

White Eagle Saloon

800 NW 6th Ave. Mia Nicholson, Steve Christofferson, David Evans

Wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St. Thao and the Get Down Stay Down, Sonny and the Sunsets

Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall

Ash Street Saloon 225 SW Ash St. Maleficent Vigor

Clyde’s Prime Rib

5474 NE Sandy Blvd. Ron Steen Jazz Jam

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Austin Jenckes, Polecat, Cody Beebe and the Crooks

Hawthorne Theatre

1507 SE 39th Ave. Gorilla Music Winter Blast: The October Sky, Surviving Yesterday, I Have No Friends, Free By Night, Harken, Chris Carpenter & The Collective, Thistle-Stalk, Breadsack

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. Hylaeus Party: The Secret Drum Band, Dubais, Marisa Anderson, DJ Allan Wilson

Ivories Jazz Lounge and Restaurant 1435 NW Flanders St. The Bylines

Jade Lounge

2346 SE Ankeny St. Djo Fortunado

JAN. 8–14

MUSIC CALENDAR

MON. JAN. 13

Landmark Saloon

4847 SE Division St. Ian Miller

Al’s Den at the Crystal Hotel

LaurelThirst

303 SW 12th Ave. Ben Darwish

2958 NE Glisan St. Freak Mountain Ramblers

Lincoln Hall, Portland State University 1620 SW Park Ave. Vladimir Feltsman

Alberta Street Public House 1036 NE Alberta St. Ghosts Like Us

Andina

1314 NW Glisan St. Pete Krebs

McMenamin’s Edgefield

Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall

2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Michele Van Kleef, Brothers and Sister

1037 SW Broadway Bach & Strauss: Emanuel Ax, Oregon Symphony

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern

Camellia Lounge

10000 Old Cornelius Pass Road, Hillsboro Hanz Araki

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Maria Taylor, St. Even, PJ Bond

Muddy Rudder Public House 8105 SE 7th Ave. Irish

510 NW 11th Ave. Jazz Vocal Jam: Joe Millward

Dante’s

350 W Burnside St. Karaoke From Hell

Ground Kontrol 511 NW Couch St. Metal Monday

Jade Lounge

NEPO 42

5403 NE 42nd Ave. Open Mic

Rontoms

600 E Burnside St. Double Plus Good, Pocketknife 720 SE Hawthorne Grizzly, Death Star Radius, Medium Size Kids, Ditch

4923 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., Suite 102 VYBZ Reggae Night

The Elixir Lab

2738 NE Alberta St. Flip’s School Of Music Student Recital

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St. The Know’s 9th Anniversary: Graves at Sea, the Siege Fire

The Old Church

1422 SW 11th Ave. Friends Being Friends: Nancy Webster, John Nilsen, Brick and Mindy Street, Aaron Martinez, Kandi Allen

Tonic Lounge

3100 NE Sandy Blvd. Disney Unlaced: A Burlesque Event Not To Be Missed Pagan Holiday, Baby Le’Strange, Valerie Deville, Shay Rebellion, Danni St. Athens, Rainbow Starbrite

2958 NE Glisan St. Kung Pao Chickens (9 pm); Portland Country Underground (6 pm)

Lincoln Hall, Portland State University 1620 SW Park Ave. Vladimir Feltsman

Lola’s Room at the Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St. Lunch, Defect Defect

Muddy Rudder Public House 8105 SE 7th Ave. Lloyd Jones

Pub at the End of the Universe 4107 SE 28th Ave. Open Mic

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St. Metal Monday: DJ Desecrator

The Elixir Lab

2738 NE Alberta St. The Moonshine

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. The Rotties, Rocket 3, the My Oh Mys

Vie de Boheme 1530 SE 7th Ave. Arthur Moore’s Harmonica Party

TUES. JAN. 14

White Eagle Saloon

Duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. Johnnie Ward’s Sharkskin Review

Goodfoot Lounge 2845 SE Stark St. Asher Fulero

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. The Redo Series: Twin Twin Peaks: Rachael Jensen & Matt Carlson

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Sidney York, Lemolo

LaurelThirst

2958 NE Glisan St. Jackstraw

Al’s Den at the Crystal Hotel

1332 W Burnside St. Johnny Payola’s Hayride

McMenamin’s Edgefield

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern

10000 Old Cornelius Pass Road, Hillsboro Open Bluegrass Jam

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave. Sticky Mulligan

Sellwood Public House 8132 SE 13th Ave. Open Mic

Starday Tavern

6517 SE Foster Rd. Joe Baker, the Joe New Trio

The Blue Diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd. Gretchen Mitchell Band

The Blue Monk

3341 SE Belmont St. Adam Brock 4, Dear Commonwealth, Celeste Amadee

The Firkin Tavern

1937 SE 11th Ave. Microphone Destroyer Showcase

Twilight Café and Bar 1420 SE Powell Blvd. Open Mic Night Featuring House Band: The Roaming

Vie de Boheme 1530 SE 7th Ave. Salsa Night

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Psychomagic, Blanco, Fever

303 SW 12th Ave. Ben Darwish

CONT. on page 34

GENE AMBO

836 N Russell St. You Knew Me When, Short Fiction

626 SW Park Ave. Larry Calame

2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Pete Krebs

LaurelThirst

The Conga Club

Brasserie Montmartre

Kells Brewpub

426 SW Washington St. Eye Candy VJs

2016 NE Sandy Blvd. Kevin Selfe and the Tornad oes

225 SW Ash St. Airing on Ghost Radio, Guy Wilkins, Trailer Home Companion

Lola’s Room at the Crystal Ballroom

Kelly’s Olympian

The Blue Diamond

Ash Street Saloon

2346 SE Ankeny St. Joe Baker’s Jellyroll Jamboree: Alexa Wiley, Joe Baker, Sean Oldham, Whistlepig, The Billycan Boys 210 NW 21st Ave. Traditional Irish Jam Session

The Analog

Andina

1314 NW Glisan St. JB Butler

PSYCHOBILLY FREAKOUT: The Reverend Horton Heat plays Wonder Ballroom on Friday, Jan. 10. Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

JAN. 8–14

COURTESY OF MOODSWING360

MUSIC CALENDAR

Ground Kontrol

511 NW Couch St. DJ Mechlo

Holocene

WED. JAN. 8 Andrea’s Cha Cha Club 832 SE Grand Ave. Salsa: DJ Alberton

Beech St. Parlor 412 NE Beech St. Housecoat

Berbati’s

231 SW Ankeny St. DJ Seleckta YT

Bossanova Ballroom 722 E Burnside St. Wednesday Swing

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. #Testify: DJ Portia, New Dadz DJs, DJ Honest John, Sex Life DJs

Moloko

3967 N Mississippi Ave The Diamond Stylus: King Tim 33 1/3

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St. DJ Boom

The Firkin Tavern 1937 SE 11th Ave. Eye Candy VJs

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. DJ Comidienne

THURS. JAN. 9 Beech St. Parlor 412 NE Beech St. DJ Doug Ferious

Berbati’s

SWIZZLE PIE: Swizzymack spins at Holocene on Saturday, Jan. 11.

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

231 SW Ankeny St. Studyhall: DJ Suga Shane

Black Book

20 NW 3rd Ave.

Modern(ist), DJ Troubled Youth, Ryan Biornstad

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. Ecstasy x Bubblin’: DJ Deeon, Massacooramaan, DJ Rafael

Moloko

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. Verfied: Swizzymack, Gang$ign$, BennyRox, Quarry

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. MRS Queer Dance Party: DJ Beyonda

1001 SE Morrison St. Ive Got A Hole In My Soul: DJ Beyondadoubt

3967 N Mississippi Ave 21st Century Rhythm and Soul Review: Hans Fricking Lindauer

Moloko

Rotture

639 SE Morrison St. DJ OverCol

3967 N Mississippi Ave Strictly Vinyl: DJ Strategy

315 SE 3rd Ave. Live and Direct

3967 N Mississippi Ave DJ Cuica

Star Bar

The Conga Club

Star Bar

The Conquistador

2045 SE Belmont St. DJ Drew Groove

4923 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., Suite 102 Tropical Saturday Salsa

The Analog

The Lovecraft

The Whiskey Bar

639 SE Morrison St. DJ Jake Cheeto 720 SE Hawthorne Muevete Jueves: Portland Timba

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Misprid

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. DJ Jen O.

FRI. JAN. 10 Beech St. Parlor 412 NE Beech St. DJ Kevin Lee

Berbati’s

231 SW Ankeny St. Cloud City Collective

Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St. 80s Video Dance Attack

Eagles Lodge, Southeast

4904 SE Hawthorne Blvd. In the Cooky Jar Soul Nite: Cooky Parker, Miss Callie

EastBurn

1800 E Burnside St. DJ Problemsolver

421 SE Grand Ave. SkullfucK: DJ Horrid

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. Cowboys From Sweden

SAT. JAN. 11 Beech St. Parlor 412 NE Beech St. DJ Arya Imig

Berbati’s

231 SW Ankeny St. DJ Mellow Cee

CC Slaughters

219 NW Davis St. Revolution with DJ Robb

Church

2600 NE Sandy Blvd. DJ Drew Groove

East End

203 SE Grand Ave. New Dadz DJs

EastBurn

1800 E Burnside St. DJ Easter Egg

Ground Kontrol

511 NW Couch St. DJ Chip

31 NW 1st Ave. Lazy Rich, Evan Alexander, Rubin Sarafinchan

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. Cooperative

SUN. JAN. 12 Berbati’s

231 SW Ankeny St. DJ Linkus EDM

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St. The Bobcat

Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave. Trance To the Sun

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. DJ Ol’ Sippy

MON. JAN. 13 Ash Street Saloon 225 SW Ash St. DJ Brux Blackhawk

Beech St. Parlor 412 NE Beech St. DJ Party Animal

Berbati’s

231 SW Ankeny St. DJ Henry Dark

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Departures: DJ Waisted

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. Alex John Hall

TUES. JAN. 14 Beech St. Parlor 412 NE Beech St. Jason Urick

Berbati’s

231 SW Ankeny St. Soundstation Tuesdays: DJ Instigatah, Snackmaster DJ

Bossanova Ballroom 722 E Burnside St. Tango Tuesday

CC Slaughters

219 NW Davis St. Girltopia with DJ Alicious

Dots Cafe

2521 SE Clinton St. Stereophonic: DJ Drew Groove

Eagle Portland

835 N Lombard St DMTV with DJ Danimal

Lodge

6605 SE Powell Blvd DJ Easy Finger

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St. DJ Scary Jerry

The Analog

720 SE Hawthorne S.Y.N.T.

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. DJ Maxamillion

Music Millennium’s Upcoming In-Stores & Events

think it’s just trivia? think again.

EMILY ASHER THURSDAY, 1/9 @ 6 PM Emily Asher's Garden Party is a versatile musical ensemble led by Asher's tenacious trombone and sweet vocals. Called "red hot" and "very exciting" by the Wall Street Journal, this band of all-stars from New York City's vibrant early jazz scene performs coast to coast and internationally in the finest jazz clubs to the busiest swing dance halls. Drawing on the repertoire of Louis Armstrong's enchanting Hot Fives, Duke Ellington's sophisticated melodies to the funky and soulful music of New Orleans brass bands, and Hoagy Carmichael's masterpieces, Garden Party delights audiences of all ages and musical tastes.

RAMENS RAM N

LAND OF THE LIVING RECORD RELEASE EVENT SATURDAY, 1/11 @ 5 PM Land of the Living is the most recent musical project of songwriter and guitarist Kivett Bednar. "I found myself tuning my guitars lower and lower; distorting my sound more and more to get the voodoo-mud I needed," says Kivett of his guitar tone during this developmental period. "The subject matter of the songs just kept getting darker and darker too, and I learned that if I sung certain notes in the right way my voice would start to rumble and growl." The band credits gangsta' rap as a major influence on the lyrical content, while harmonically taking a page from the ancient tome of doom. And while these genres might seem quite disparate, the amalgam is a seamless blend of the intensity metal can offer with the hustle and flow of rap; all without losing the soul of the blues.

Monday

Thirsty Lion (Portland ) — 7:00 PM Hawthorne Hideaway (Portland) — 8:00 PM Rose & Thistle (Portland) — 8:00 PM Alberta St. Pub — 8:00 PM (Starts Feb 10)

Thursdays @ 8pm Redwing Bar & Grill

Tuesday 4012 30th St • North Park

The Dugout (Hillsboro) — 7:00 PM Biddy McGraw's (Portland) — 7:00 PM Cheerful Tortoise (Portland) — 9:00 PM Shanahan's (Vancouver) — 7:00 PM Laurelwood Public House (SE) — 8:00 PM The Ram Restaurant & Brewery — 8:00 PM (starts Jan 21st) (Wilsonville)

Mondays @ 9pm Bourbon Street Bar & Grill 4612 Park Blvd - University Heights

Wednesday 8pm ays) -@ rd(Portland Satu Cheerful Bullpen 8:30 PM Kelly’s Pub

Concordia Ale House (Portland ) - 8:00 PM Space Room (Portland ) - 7:00 PM Tonic Lounge (Portland ) — 7:00 PM Buffalo Gap (Portland) — 7:30PM (Starts Jan 8)

2222 San Diego Ave • Old Town

Thursday m @ 8p ys(Portland 21st Avenue Barda & Grill ) - 7:00 PM Tues (starts August 14th)

Belmont Inn (Portland ) - 7:00 PM

South Park Abbey

1946 Fern Street • South Park www.geekswhodrink.com @geekswhodrink

facebook.com/geekswhodrink

GET BREAKING

NEWS FIRST FOLLOW @WWE E K ON T WIT TER

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

jan. 8–14

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

Mixology

Most prices listed are for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply, so it’s best to call ahead. Editor: REBECCA JACOBSON. Theater: REBECCA JACOBSON (rjacobson@wweek.com). Dance: AARON SPENCER (dance@wweek.com). TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit information at least two weeks in advance to: rjacobson@wweek.com.

THEATER OPENINGS & PREVIEWS Chinglish

Portland Center Stage kicks off 2014 with David Henry Hwang’s 2011 comedy, in which an American businessman tries to land a plum contract in China, only to get tangled in linguistic and cultural confusion. Gerding Theater, 128 NW 11th Ave., 445-3700. 7:30 pm Tuesdays-Sundays; 2 pm Saturdays-Sundays; noon some Thursdays through Feb. 9. $29-$69.

Cuéntame Coyote

Dañel Malán, one of the co-founders of Milagro Theatre, directs her own bilingual play about two cousins whose desire to flee their Mexican border town takes them on a long walk across the Sonoran desert. Miracle Theatre, 525 SE Stark St., 236-7253. 7:30 pm Thursdays, 8 pm Fridays-Saturdays and 2 pm Sundays through Jan. 25. $17-$26.

Just Like You

The newest production from Well Arts, a nonprofit that organizes playwriting workshops for individuals who’ve experienced trauma or physical or mental illness, features stories written by the mothers of children with developmental disabilities. Portland Actors Conservatory, 1436 SW Montgomery St., 274-1717. 7:30 pm Fridays and 2 pm Saturdays through Jan. 18. $5-$10.

The Mousetrap

Agatha Christie’s murder-mystery whodunit about eight strangers trapped together during a snowstorm has played continuously in London’s West End since 1952, making it the longest-running show in the world. Lake Oswego’s Lakewood Theatre Company presents the venerable warhorse. Lakewood Center for the Arts, 368 S State St., Lake Oswego, 6353901. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays; 2 pm Sundays, Jan. 19 and Feb. 2, 19 and 16; 7 pm Sundays, Jan. 12, 19 and 26. Through Feb. 16. $32.

Shackleton’s Antarctic Nightmare

To mark the 100-year anniversary of Ernest Shackleton’s doomed expedition to Antarctica, Portland Story Theater’s Lawrence Howard revives his one-man show about the British explorer. Hipbone Studio, 1847 E Burnside St., 358-0898. 8 pm Fridays-Saturdays through Jan. 25 (no show Jan. 10). $15$35.

Tales of Ballycumber

Corrib Theatre, a local company specializing in Irish drama, begins its second season with a staged reading of Sebastian Barry’s 2009 play. It’s a ghostly drama about a bachelor farmer who gives a piece of advice to a teenage neighbor, only to have things go terribly and tragically awry. Lumber Room, 419 NW 9th Ave. 7:30 pm Mondays, Jan. 13 and 20 and 7:30 pm Tuesday, Jan. 21. $10.

ALSO PLAYING Evita

The touring production of Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rice’s musical about Madonna—oh wait, sorry; we mean former Argentine first lady Eva Peron—hits Portland. Don’t cry for her, Argentina. Keller Auditorium, 222 SW Clay St., 800-745-3000. 7:30 pm Tuesday-Friday, 2 and 7:30 pm Saturday and 1 and 6:30 pm Sunday, Jan. 7-12. $35-$75.

Noises Off

When I first saw Noises Off as a 14-yearold at the Oregon Shakespeare Festival, I didn’t know theater could do that. A dozen years later—and after watching

dozens and dozens of plays—I’m still not quite sure how Noises Off does what it does. What’s clear, though, is that Michael Frayn’s 1982 backstage comedy is perhaps the world’s most exactingly constructed play, and certainly one of its funniest. It centers on a thirdrate British theater troupe staging an abysmal bedroom farce, and it’s essentially the same thing three times over— just with snowballing levels of lunacy as the company’s disastrous personal dynamics and dubious talents collide in hellish but hilarious ways. This production is Third Rail’s first farce in years, and a departure from its usual sharptongued or politically tinged fare. While it can’t eclipse my first fling with Noises Off, director Scott Yarbrough’s rendition is more than serviceable, even if the second act could use some polish. It’s a mostly solid cast, but a few actors stand out. Damon Kupper, in a garish orange shirt and (not orange) Carrot Top wig, has a command of physical comedy that’s simultaneously smarmy and daffy. Even daffier is the black bustierclad Kelly Godell, who spends the play unflappably barreling ahead with careful line readings, even as everything around her crashes into smithereens. And we’d be nowhere without Maureen Porter as the de facto mother hen: She’s the glue holding together both the play and the play within the play. Despite some questionable casting (Isaac Lamb exudes far too much teddy-bear cuddliness to play the beleaguered, snarky director), these performers bring method—and, surprisingly, humanity—to the madness. REBECCA JACOBSON. Winningstad Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 235-1101. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays and 2 pm Sundays through Jan. 11. $20-$43.

COMEDY & VARIETY Charlie Murphy

Eddie Murphy’s older brother, best known for his “True Hollywood” sketches on Chapelle’s Show, brings his profanity-happy Acid Trip tour to Portland. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave., 234-9694. 10 pm Friday, Jan. 10. $30. 21+.

Comedy Grab Bag

Kimberly Brady and Jay Flewelling host another installment of their comedy variety show, this time riffing on office team-building activities—and the slippery slope from trust falls and name games to cultish brainwashing. In addition to special appearances by standup comic Tim Hammer and monologuist Sam De Roest, show regulars the Baguettes return with more improv comedy. Action/Adventure Theatre, 1050 SE Clinton St. 8 pm FridaySaturday, Jan. 10-11. $6-$8.

ComedySportz

Family-friendly competitive improv comedy. ComedySportz, 1963 NW Kearney St., 236-8888. 8 pm FridaysSaturdays. $15.

Curious Comedy Open Mic

Gabe Dinger hosts a weekly openmic night. Sign-ups begin at 7:15, and comics get three minutes of stage time apiece. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 8 pm every Sunday. Free.

Kyle Kinane

Kyle Kinane might be known for his hobo-clown persona (and his hilarious Twitter war with a fake Pace salsa account), but he’s also a fantastically smart standup comic who’s able to balance self-deprecating material with outright silliness. See Headout on page 21 for some of Kinane’s own jokes. Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave., 888-643-8669. 8 pm Thursday and 7:30 and 10 pm Friday-Saturday, Jan. 9-11. $15-$25. 21+.

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

Late-night comedy show with improv, sketch and standup. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 10 pm every Saturday. $5.

Pipes: An Improvised Musical

Comedic improv, set to song. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 8 pm Fridays-Saturdays through Jan. 24. $12-$15.

USS Improvise: The Next Generation the Musical

Funhouse improv troupe the Unscriptables brings back its popular Star Trek spoof, complete with unscripted musical numbers and dance numbers. Funhouse Lounge, 2432 SE 11th Ave., 841-6734. 7:30 pm Saturdays through Feb. 8. $10.

you don’t get to suggest the order of clothing removal (not many options there, anyway). You just get to pick the music—but that’s something. And there’s a theme: This week it’s the ’90s. The performers create the act on the spot—hopefully to something impossible like Creed—and the audience chooses a winner. The Analog, 720 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 432-8079. 8 pm Thursday, Jan. 9. $10. 21+.

Meshi Chavez

Meshi Chavez, a 36-year-old masseur and personal trainer, has been practicing butoh for 10 years, and he just wrapped up another installment of his residency program. This performance, Being Moved, features 10 of his students, who

range in age from 19 to 60. Each will perform a 10-minute solo, five students per night, on themes of darkness and night. Chavez will close every show with Tears of the Night Butterfly, an improvisational piece inspired by the underappreciated beauty of moths. Covered in butoh’s traditional white body paint in an effort to erase his humanity, he’ll react to images in his mind and explore his own consciousness. As of opening night, he couldn’t say exactly how that will look. The Headwaters, 55 NE Farragut St., No. 9, 971-258-0748. 7:30 pm Friday-Saturday, Jan. 10-11. $15.

For more Performance listings, visit

PREVIEW PAT R I C K W E I S H A M P E L

PERFORMANCE

Weekly Recurring Humor Night

Whitney Streed hosts a weekly comedy showcase, featuring local comics and out-of-towners. Tonic Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy Blvd., 238-0543. 9:30 pm every Wednesday. “Pay what you want,” $3-$5 suggested.

DANCE Bergamot Burlesque

Judith Stein, 65, is billed as “Canada’s only legend of burlesque,” but she got her start as a student at the University of Oregon in the 1970s. She wasn’t technically doing burlesque—she was strapped for cash and got a gig as a go-go dancer—but she felt so comfortable taking off her clothes that she took her show on the road. She recently started performing again a few times each year. This time it’s back in Oregon at an event for burlesque legends produced by the Infamous Nina Nightshade. Stein was always known for her funnygirl act more than her overt sexiness, but even now she strips all the way down to pasties. Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St., 719-6055. 8 pm Friday, Jan. 10. $15-$20. 21+.

Burlynomicon

The Mad Marquis hosts the darkly comic burlesque show this month, featuring dancers Holly Dai, Rummy Rose and Erika Ryn and contortionist Emmy G. The Lovecraft, 421 SE Grand Ave., 971-270-7760. 9:30 Tuesday, Jan. 14. $8. 21+.

Durante Lambert

You know Durante Lambert probably holed himself up in his apartment for days after that surprise Beyoncé LP dropped. He’s also probably a little pained he didn’t have enough time to incorporate any of the singles into his new show, Beyond Measures. Or did he? The evening-length show from the Portland hip-hop choreographer, who is often to and fro from Los Angeles, features work by his usual suspects: Jenelle Yarbrough, Gerran Reese, Allison Franco and TJ Yale among them, in addition to some choreographers from L.A. This is music video-style hip-hop, high-energy and crowd-pleasing—even with old Beyoncé. Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 248-4335. 8 pm Saturday, Jan. 11. $28.25.

Eowyn Emerald

The former BodyVox company member presents the third installment of her collaborative show Pacific Dance Makers, which brings together seven choreographers from the Pacific Northwest. Among them is Anne Mueller, Oregon Ballet Theatre’s former interim artistic director who’s now managing director of Hillsboro’s Bag & Baggage Theatre Company. Also performing is TopShakeDance founder Jim McGinn, Jessica “name fits her height” Hightower, BodyVox’s Samuel Hobbs and Tracey Durbin and, from Seattle, the usually improvisational Elia Mrak. BodyVox Dance Center, 1201 NW 17th Ave., 229-0627. 7:30 Friday-Saturday, Jan. 10-11. $15-$20.

Improvaganza Burlesque

So you think once you’ve seen one burlesque show you’ve seen ’em all, eh? Well, Zora Phoenix has just the ticket for you: improv burlesque! No,

tHe sWing of tHings: Mandy Cregan (left) and Megan faria.

3X3 (POV DANCE) The last time POV Dance performed was in 2010, when the company balanced on windowsills and did handstands in the atrium of Southeast Portland’s Ford Building. The years since have been eventful for the group’s co-founders: Noel Plemmons toured with lauded company Teeth and incurred a back injury while heaving violently from bad ceviche in Mexico, and Mandy Cregan ended a decadelong marriage. Feeling stronger and wiser, the two choreographers have reunited for another site-specific piece, this time at the Leftbank Project, a set of three redeveloped buildings just east of the Broadway Bridge. In the new work, Cregan, Plemmons and four other dancers hang from the ceiling, swing under beams and climb on walls as minders guide the audience through the trendily redesigned hallways. The piece is called 3x3, named for various groupings of three—three buildings, three duets, three groups of audience members. It’s not a very calculated title, but Plemmons and Cregan don’t seem too concerned. “I’ll be honest: Mandy and I don’t put a whole lot of thought into our titles,” says Plemmons, 42. “The Ford Building Project was about as unoriginal as you can get.” In fact, they don’t really care about pretense at all. While some sitespecific dance performances—such as Heidi Duckler’s recent piece at the U.S. Custom House—try to connect with a building’s history, POV just wants its dancers to move through the space in a gripping way. “We’ve never said to our dancers, ‘You need to think about how this has been a creamery or a jazz club or a garage,’” Plemmons says, referring to previous functions of the Leftbank Building, “because we’ll end up with someone miming whipping cream.” What you get instead are athleticism and ingenuity—think dance meets parkour. At one point, a dancer finds a fist-sized hole in the grout and uses it to scale the wall like a rock climber. Later, in the spacious lobby, the audience converges to watch two performers slide on their bellies down the banister. More dancers dangle from the second-floor mezzanine. “Our dance is really about the acrobatics and the beauty of the dance in the space,” Plemmons says, “and not so much about getting the audience to think really hard.” By the piece’s nature, you can’t see every dancer at every moment: There might be a duet happening right around the corner, visible to some audience members but not others. To fill in those blanks, filmmaker Patrick Weishampel made videos that he’ll project on the walls. It’s a helpful addition—with dancers as dynamic as this, you’ll want to see as much as you can. AARON SPENCER.

Climbing up walls and sliding down banisters.

see it: 3x3 is at Leftbank, 240 N Broadway, povdance.org. 8 pm Thursdays-Saturdays and 6 pm Sundays through Jan. 26. $20.

VISUAL ARTS

jan. 8–14

= WW Pick. Highly recommended. By RichaRd SpeeR. TO Be cONSideRed FOR LiSTiNGS, submit show information—including opening and closing dates, gallery address and phone number—at least two weeks in advance to: Visual arts, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., portland, OR 97210. email: rspeer@wweek.com.

Becoming Blackfish

it’s easy to take Blackfish Gallery for granted. it’s been around since 1979, and its programming is reliably unreliable; some shows soar, others go kerplunk. But the 35th anniversary exhibition Becoming Blackfish invites us to take a fresh look at this artist co-op, showcasing works by 22 of the gallery’s founding and forming members. highlights include Julia Fish’s Study for Living Rooms: SouthEast One With SouthEast Two, an elegant rectilinear study in sienna ink. Judy cooke’s Corner has a similar architectonic élan, its straight black lines a counterpoint to the wooden piece’s natural grain. and arvie Smith’s gloriously garish vaudevillian portrait, Mr. Kicks, reminds us just how delightful and important an artist Smith is. congrats to Blackfish on 35 years, and here’s to 35 more. Through Feb. 1. Blackfish Gallery, 420 NW 9th Ave., 234-2634.

Bling Boutique

With a title like Bling Boutique, Mark Woolley Gallery’s 20th anniversary show was bound to be an exercise in glitz, and that’s just what it turned out to be. Some of the sparkliest works in this sprawling group show come courtesy of Wesley Younie. his sculpture of a miniature black volcano appears to be coated in glittery flecks of mica mixed with obsidian. Less majestic and more whimsical is his painting of a droll frog, sitting implacably on a background of shimmering gold leaf. it walks a delicate line between whimsy and opulence, irony and post-irony. Through Jan. 25. Mark Woolley Gallery @ Pioneer, 700 SW 5th Ave., third floor, Pioneer Place Mall, 998-4152.

Brooks Dierdorff: Rest Easy

Brooks dierdorff riffs on antiquarian film-processing techniques in Rest Easy, his charming installation in the pdX Window project. exposing film that has been covered with beach towels, he creates patterns that incorporate the towels’ crumpled folds. The resulting imagery walks a winning line between representation and abstraction. Through Feb. 1. PDX Window Project, 925 NW Flanders St., 222-0063.

David Curt Morris and Louis Bunce

With their architectonic shapes, rendered in wood, resin and acrylics, david curt Morris’ works are alternately playful and exacting. They make for a jaunty, natural complement to the late Louis Bunce’s works on paper, which superimpose biomorphic forms atop geometric frameworks. Through Feb. 1. Laura Russo Gallery, 805 NW 21st Ave., 226-2754.

Francis Bacon: Three Studies of Lucien Freud

it’s a spectacle that brings old-timey nouns to mind: brouhaha, hubbub, hullabaloo. The rather sudden and mysterious appearance of Francis Bacon’s Three Studies of Lucien Freud at the portland art Museum has engendered tireless (and tiresome) speculation about who owns the astronomically priced triptych. But purely as an art object, does the piece live up to all the Sturm und drang? in a word, no. despite its art-historical and economic significance, it’s a pretty drab, flat exercise in basic psychological portraiture. Bacon sits his friend Freud down in a simple stool in a loose, crass pose. Bacon renders his subject’s body with illustrator-like simplicity and depicts his face in the grotesque contours that were Bacon’s stock and store. he places the stool within a receded cube, a bed frame at its endpoint, before a mustard yellow background. Bacon and Freud fans will no doubt relish the chance to see this relic of the influential painters’ complex dynamic, but viewers with tastes running toward more purely optical pleasures will likely leave underwhelmed. The work’s visual symbolism is simplistic, and Bacon’s flashy technique, which once held genuine shock value, now comes across as sophomoric and tame. Through March 30. Portland Art Museum, 1219 SW Park Ave., 226-0973.

I Never Complained About the Past: New Work/New Year

Storm Tharp treats us to a cubistinflected gouache-on-paper painting, Tronie of a Man Who Looked Like His Parents. although it’s highly stylized, the piece is somehow less mannered than Tharp’s previous figurative work. he includes fastidious details, such as highly textural crisscrossing lines, which contrast against the swaths of flat paint surrounding them. also of note is Joe Rudko’s Object Drawing series, which incorporates nifty trompe l’oeil effects. You look at the drawings’ different components and would swear they’re collaged, but in fact they’re drawn. how’d he do that? Simple: his technique kicks ass. Through Feb. 1. PDX Contemporary Art, 925 NW Flanders St., 222-0063.

Jerry Mayer and Ellen George: Match

it couldn’t be simpler: two colored lights—one pale purple, the other bright blue—in a dark room. percussive sounds come out of their bases. The lights and sounds seem to talk to one another in a Morse code-like language, the sounds gradually going in and out of sync like a Terry Riley piece. Through Feb. 2. Nine Gallery, 122 NW 8th Ave., 503-227-7114.

Willamette Week’s

Leonard Ruder: Paintings

REVIEW

Leonard Ruder (1917-2010) worked as a school custodian by day but at night was a prolific painter. he rarely exhibited his work, but this posthumous show proves that his paintings from the mid-1950s to the mid-1960s were the equal of many painters’ of much greater renown. in the bravura painting titled Rectangles, he traversed a continuum of yellow tones from sunflower to mustard to lemon to canary. Slathering oil paints in architectonic wedges, he used palette knives to create luscious textures. Through Feb. 1. Augen DeSoto, 716 NW Davis St., 224-8182.

Shine: Winter Group Exhibition

There are plenty of flashy pieces in charles hartman’s winter group show, but a commitedly unflashy photograph outshines everything else. Jeffrey conley’s silver gelatin print Granary Beam shows that a well-composed image of a tree trunk’s rings can be nothing short of sublime visual poetry. This exhibition also marks the first appearance of Blakely dadson’s work at hartman. dadson was a staple at the now-closed chambers Gallery. his upcoming solo show this summer should be a treat. Through Feb. 28. Charles A. Hartman Fine Art, 134 NW 8th Ave., 287-3886.

The Art of Musical Maintenance

Some of the most dynamic poster art in the world graces the Goodfoot this month, as more than 40 artists exhibit in the venue’s 10th annual exposition, The Art of Musical Maintenance. Using a continuum of techniques ranging from hand-drawn to computer-generated, artists from across the country fill the Goodfoot’s cavernous but still inexplicably cozy space with some 300 posters. david Welker designed the show’s promotional banner, which features a nude angel, legs turned outward in provocative contrapposto, standing beside a hellish bonfire. Through Jan. 27. Goodfoot Lounge, 2845 SE Stark St., 503-239-9292.

The Big 400

Four hundred artists showing pieces priced at $40 a pop. if that’s not incentive for gift-buying, we don’t know what is. The brainchild of artist-impresario chris haberman, this annual exhibition originated in 2007 as The Big 100, later became The Big 300, and has now metastasized into the current gargantuan opencall extravaganza. The artworks are hung randomly, without any title cards divulging artists’ names. So you’re not distracted by the reputation of a “name” artist; everybody’s equalized in a vast orgy of imagery, from representation to pure abstraction. exhibited with the additional participation of the adjoining Mark Woolley Gallery, this is aesthetic democracy in action. Through Jan. 12. People’s Gallery, Pioneer Place Mall, 700 SW 5th Ave., third floor, Suite 4005.

For more Visual arts listings, visit

unTITlEd PHoTo by fErnando brITo

YOUR STEPS WERE LOST IN THE LANDSCAPE The sun is setting through a line of trees, casting a golden glow upon a man who lies sleeping alongside a dirt road. Except he’s not sleeping—he’s dead. That chilling revelation hits you as you look at Fernando Brito’s photographs, and for a second, you wonder whether they’re stills from a horror movie. They’re not. The images in this breathtaking and disturbing exhibition, Your Steps Were Lost in the Landscape, had their genesis in Brito’s day job as a photojournalist for the newspaper El Debate in Culiacán, Mexico. Because the city is a hub for narcotics trafficking and drug-related violence, Brito snaps gruesome crime scenes every few days. But once he’s taken the paper’s official pictures, which tend not to be graphic, he composes a second set of shots for himself—shots that reach beyond the province of journalism into the echelons of fine art. Brito frames dead bodies graciously, rapturously, the way rococo painter Antoine Watteau framed figures in bucolic landscapes. He contextualizes them within their surroundings: billows of fog, the glare of midday sun, a cornfield, a river. The serenity of these scenes serves as a visual foil to the brutality wrought upon their unfortunate subjects, some of whom bear evidence of having been whipped, their hands and feet bound, skin ripped by knives or bullets such that the corpses look more like raw meat than human beings. Most of the bodies lie alone, but others are lined up in groups; some are freshly dead, others in various states of decomposition. Nobody will find this an easy show to look at. Some will deem the subject matter exploitative, while others counter that the end— bringing this violence to light—justifies the means inherent in its shock value. Beyond debate is the work’s sheer, dark, terrible beauty. Wisely leaving sociopolitical implications to us, Brito’s lens is not moralistic but aesthetic. This is a photographer who knows that “an ethical sympathy in an artist,” as Oscar Wilde wrote in The Picture of Dorian Gray, “is an unpardonable mannerism of style.” RICHARD SPEER.

a photojournalist makes art of death.

SEE IT: Your Steps Were Lost in the Landscape is at Blue Sky Gallery, 122 NW 8th ave., 225-0210. Through Feb. 2.

3rd Annual

It works! Hurry: The deadline is Thursday 1/9 at 4pm. Contact Matt Plambeck at WW to learn more.

Call 503-445-2757 or go to wweek.com/volunteerguide Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

Willamette Week’s

BEER GUIDE February 5th • 2014

BOOKS

jan. 8–14

= WW Pick. Highly recommended. By PENELOPE BASS. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit lecture or reading information at least two weeks in advance to: WORDS, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: words@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

SATURDAY, JAN. 11 Adventure Time: Flip Side

Embracing the ever-popular Freaky Friday formula, the Adventure Time comic crew will dabble in some body-swapping shenanigans in the first of the new miniseries Adventure Time: Flip Side. On hand for the release of the comic will be writers (and Eisner Award-winning Bandette team) Paul Tobin and Colleen Coover with illustrator Wook Jin Clark. Cosmic Monkey Comics, 5335 NE Sandy Blvd., 517-9050. Noon-2 pm. Free.

Lisa Gardner and Lisa Jackson

Although not everyone will admit it, we all love genre fiction. From supernatural erotica to dystopian young adult, we eat it up. So everyone should just revel in it when Lisa Gardner and Lisa Jackson each read from their new psychological thrillers, Fear Nothing and Sinister, respectively. Powell’s Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, 3415 SW Cedar Hills Blvd., Beaverton, 228-4651. 4 pm. Free.

SUNDAY, JAN. 12 Marc Hinton

Taking it all the way back to what the earliest inhabitants of the Pacific Northwest dined on (mastodon?), Marc Hinton explores the long history of food in the region in his new, logically titled book, A History of Pacific Northwest Cuisine. From the Lewis and Clark expedition to the James Beard Award, Hinton delves into the traditions, ingredients and styles that shape the way we eat in this part of the world. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 228-4651. 7:30 pm. Free.

The Studio Series

In addition to her chapbook She Preferred to Read the Knives, Portland-based poet Susan Denning’s work has appeared in publications like Filter, Quick Fiction and New York Quarterly. Her next chapbook, How to Live Forever, will be released this fall. Joining Dennings on the Stonehenge stage is Eugene-based poet Cecelia Hagen, whose debut poetry collection, Entering, was widely praised. An open mic will follow the reading, if anyone has the guts. Stonehenge Studios, 3508 SW Corbett Ave., 2243640. 7-9 pm. Free.

MONDAY, JAN. 13 Oregon Encyclopedia History Night

With so many distinct neighborhoods in Portland, each with their own character and history, the Oregon Encyclopedia History Night could conduct an entire series. This time, though, the focus is on the Alameda neighborhood, with local historian Doug Decker exploring the area’s founding and early life. Bask in the casual affluence. Mission Theater, 1624 NW Glisan St., 223-4527. 7 pm. Free.

Ishmael Beah

SPACE RESERVATION DEADLINE - JAN. 15 CALL: 503.243.2122 • EMAIL: ADVERTISING @WWEEK.COM 38

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

Ishmael Beah topped the bestseller lists with the 2007 release of his memoir, A Long Way Gone, about child soldiers in Sierra Leone’s civil war. Now with his first novel, Radiance of Tomorrow, Beah returns to his home country to explore how two friends can rebuild a life in a war-torn village. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 228-4651. 7:30 pm. Free.

Okey Ndibe

Ike, a Nigerian cab driver living in New York City, is set on stealing a statue of an ancient war deity from his home village to resell to a gallery

in the city. Okey Ndibe’s new novel, Foreign Gods, Inc., contrasts the modern infatuation with the exotic and the dreams and hardships of the immigrant life in America. Powell’s on Hawthorne, 3723 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 228-4651. 7:30 pm. Free.

rytelling and his fascination with identity and culture, author Changrae Lee (Native Speaker, The Surrendered) imagines a declining future America, where society is strictly segregated by class. Fishtank diver Fan leaves the relative safety of the B-Mor settlement (formerly Baltimore) to search for her lost lover through the dangerous “Open Counties” in On Such a Full Sea. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 228-4651. 7:30 pm. Free.

TUESDAY, JAN. 14 Chang-rae Lee

For more Books listings, visit

Building on his reputation for sto-

REVIEW

LANGDON COOK, THE MUSHROOM HUNTERS There’s a bit of a vogue in mushroom pickers. From Burkhard Bilger’s picaresque 2007 piece in The New Yorker to a photo essay published this year on Slate.com that might as well have been funded by the Works Progress A dministration, each reporter uncovers anew a desperate gold rush in the pines: meth-ravaged cowboys You can’t spell fungus and poor immigrant families without fun. gleaning elusive matsutakes in the Cascadian backwoods, to be consumed at $40 a pound by the foodie bourgeoisie. Each anecdote, seemingly, contains the threat of a knife fight. Seattle writer Langdon Cook’s The Mushroom Hunters (Ballantine, 320 pages, $26) has its dodgy moments, too—woodlands crack cookeries, poaching on public lands, and gacked-out incompetents trying to strip the earth of fungus as if ripping copper from a house’s wall—but what differentiates Cook from these other writers is the depth of his interest. He is a co-conspirator in the hunt, himself obsessed with mushrooms. He is obsessed with the entire physical world, and his descriptions border on the ecstatic. Hedgehog mushrooms live in cedar bogs “where the earth feels like it is moving under your feet, with dark brown, nearly red splinters of cedar piercing the blackened dirt like shipwrecks.” Trees at the edge of the continent stand “shell-shocked.” Especially in the book’s early sections, Cook shares with writer John McPhee a rare knack for weaving together people and their obsessions. He pairs descriptions of the musty pineapple smell of an Oregon black truffle, or the tooth-grinding boredom of picking a sea of penis-shaped morels, with empathetic portraits of the people at every station in the mushroom business. So Cook follows a thrice-divorced former logger named Doug, one of the few journeyman pickers willing to give up his secrets, on a predawn hunt for hedgehogs, and camps out at a Laotian picker party until drink makes one of the family members a little dangerous. He follows mushroom buyer and purveyor Jeremy Faber up to Alaska during a bad mushroom season for Washington, taking the reader along on a dicey trip through Canadian customs. His tone lapses only when dining. Cook fawns over the food of Sitka & Spruce chef Matt Dillon in Seattle, falling prey to the citymagazine habit of romancing chefs as heroic and unfathomable magicians. Dillon comes alive, instead, in the eyes of Faber, who views Dillon as a flawed friend, trusted collaborator and glory hog. Indeed, one of the book’s great successes is in drawing out the complicated relationships forged at the improvised frontiers of high-end foods. But it is among the foragers themselves, and at the ramshackle buyers’ stands at the edge of forest burns—amid the yearlong transients who chase mushrooms all across the country— that the book is most at home. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. GO: Langdon Cook will read at Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., on Thursday, Jan. 9. 7:30 pm. Free.

jan. 8–14 REVIEW

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

C O U R T E S Y O F WA R N E R B R O S . P I C T U R E S

MOVIES

Editor: REBECCA JACOBSON. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, send screening information at least two weeks in advance to Screen, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: rjacobson@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

12 Years a Slave

A Twelve Years a Slave was part of

a literary tide. When the memoir was published in 1853, Uncle Tom’s Cabin and Frederick Douglass’ autobiography were bestsellers, helping to fuel the abolitionist movement. But Solomon Northup’s story was different. Born a free man, he led a comfortable life as a carpenter and violinist with his wife and children in upstate New York in 1841, when he was kidnapped and sold into slavery. Northup managed to regain his freedom 12 years later and soon published Twelve Years a Slave, which became a bestseller of its own. But at some point, Northup disappeared and his book fell out of print. Now, it’s little-known outside the halls of academia. All of which makes British director Steve McQueen’s 12 Years a Slave an even more staggering revelation. The film is agonizing but not lurid, compassionate but not melodramatic, patient but still thrilling. R. REBECCA JACOBSON. Cinema 21.

47 Ronin

C 47 Ronin’s most enjoyable moments are also its most ludicrous. These include, but are not limited to: an attack from a roving beast that might generously be described as “mythical”; a shape-shifting witch helping a court official usurp his rival’s power, thereby springing the masterless samurai of the title into vengeful action; and a pep talk beginning with the words, “What I propose ends in death.” Keep in mind that Carl Erik Rinsch’s $175 million film is based on actual 18thcentury events, happenings that presumably did not resemble Mortal Kombat or Princess Mononoke in the slightest. Any in-depth explanation of how and why the “half-breed” played by Keanu Reeves ended up exiled to a Dutch island, forced to fight a giant to the death, would only distract from the goofy spectacle of it all. All of which is a long way of saying that Rinsch’s take on one of Japan’s most famous stories is a curious folly, albeit an almost endearingly sincere (and strange) one that seems to revere its legendary source material as much as it distorts it. PG-13. MICHAEL NORDINE. Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Lloyd Mall.

About Time

C In About Time, writer-director Richard Curtis—who scripted Four Weddings and a Funeral and Notting Hill—tells yet another tale of a British bloke besotted with an American woman in London. Now, though, there’s a time-travel hook. Tim (Domhnall Gleeson) and Mary (Rachel McAdams) are the destinedto-be-happy couple. The twist is that Tim can visit the past without the pesky problem of running into younger selves. If you could constantly revise the past, how would this affect your morality? Alas, About Time doesn’t go down this enticing rabbit hole, remaining too committed to rutted sentimentality. R. KRISTI MITSUDA. Laurelhurst.

All Is Lost

A- We all know Robert Redford too

well. We know that, after nearly 50 years on the big screen, Redford the man is not an investigative journalist, a gadabout sidekick or a dark-horse power hitter. He is, however, a mildly eccentric and reclusive celebrity, one who might very well undertake a solo sailing trip around the world. As the only actor in All Is Lost, he does just that. Then, wood cracks and water rushes in. A shipping container has punched a hole in the hull, destroying the GPS and radio. He does his best to patch the hole, but it’s Redford vs. the world from here on out. This is one man, alone, facing death. Redford is playing himself, and he’s not playing around. PG-13. MITCH LILLIE. Laurelhurst, Academy.

American Hustle

A Director David O. Russell’s vision of

America has always been Winesburg, Ohio, hopped up on trucker speed: a place of frantic grotesques distorted by their own need. In his new film, American Hustle—loosely based on the Abscam federal bribery scandal of the 1970s—everyone from New Jersey’s mayor to federal agents to small-time con artists are so warped by ambition that integrity and even identity become expensive luxury items. The film is a balls-to-the-wall, unbridled love affair with homegrown bullshit and piss-taking. It’s a wild pretzel of a plot: con man Irving Rosenfeld (Christian Bale) and mistress Sydney Prosser (Amy Adams) have been caught by DiMaso in an undercover sting and are forced to run confidence rackets for the feds in order to nab other grifters. Halfway through the film, it’s unclear who’s conning whom, but it’s clear everybody’s conning themselves. This is the high wire that makes American Hustle so exhilarating, with the quick turns of a David Mamet or Howard Hawks fast-talkie. Really, it’s the sort of flick we’ve rarely seen since the ’40s: a farce with a heart. R. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Oak Grove, St. Johns.

Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues

B- It’s been nearly a decade since Ron Burgundy and the Channel 4 News Team graced the silver screen, but you’d be forgiven for thinking they never left. As soon as Ron himself announced the character’s return on Conan last year, he’s been everywhere. After a year of anticipation, we’d be forgiven for being sick of the hype. But oh, does Anchorman 2 contain some serious belly laughs, and the instant Ron (Will Ferrell) hits the screen reading nonsense news and exclaiming, “By the hymen of Olivia NewtonJohn,” goodwill returns. Where the first Anchorman marveled at the foreign-seeming world of ‘70s network news, director Adam McKay’s sequel takes its cue from his buddy-cop flick The Other Guys, and he peppers the screwball, surrealist comedy with an actual message, taking aim at the decline of real journalism. This time, Burgundy and his team try to conquer the 24-hour cable-news cycle of the ’80s with alarmist weather warnings and baseless live reporting on car chases. Anchorman 2 does contain some misses, particularly a bizarre and overlong second act in which Ron leaves the business for some soul searching. But it’s still good to have Ron Burgundy back, even if he kind of overstays his welcome. PG13. AP KRYZA. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Lloyd Mall, St. Johns.

Blue Is the Warmest Color

A- As soon as Abdellatif Kechiche’s

Blue Is the Warmest Color premiered in Cannes last May, frenzied discussion engulfed the film. Whether people found it exhilarating or exploitative, it seemed no one could shut up about this three-hour French saga about first love between two young women. The seven-minute sex scene monopolized much of the conversation, with a video montage that captures the responses of real lesbians eventually going viral. But for all the hooting it has unleashed, Blue Is the Warmest Color isn’t strident or demagogic. Instead, the film spends its 179 minutes slowly wringing you out like an old rag, until you’re finally tossed roughly over the line, depleted, devastated and stunned at what has just transpired. The film charts the evolution of the relationship between Adèle (Adèle Exarchopoulos, whose astounding performance will knock the wind out of you), and Emma (Léa Seydoux), who is a few years older. From the initial moment the two lock eyes, their connection is as electric as the shock of blue through

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SIRI, aRE yOu TRyING TO SEDuCE mE?: Joaquin Phoenix isn’t alone.

COMPUTER LOVE IN SPIKE JONZE’S HER, THE LOVE IS REAL— EVEN IF SHE IS NOT. BY MaTTHEW SIn GER

msinger@wweek.com

And so there’s this computer. It’s not exactly a laptop, or a tablet or smartphone, but an artificially hyperintelligent operating system that’s half personal secretary, half therapist. It speaks in a naturalistic feminine rasp. It seems to be thinking. It seems to know you. “In every moment, I’m evolving,” she explains the first time she powers on. You fall in love with her. She falls in love with you. She develops the capacity for jealousy. Eventually, you’re arguing about sex and how she’s spending too much time hanging out with dead philosophers. She refuses to boot up when you want her to. Then she starts saying things like, “I’m becoming much more than they programmed.” Twenty years ago, this scenario would’ve played as a dystopian nightmare. Indeed, Her, director Spike Jonze’s tale of a man’s affair with the disembodied voice that helps organize his email, bears some correlation to The Terminator—only instead of rising up to extinguish the human race, the machines just break our hearts. But in the era of Catfish, where “dating” is an increasingly abstract concept, such a premise can serve as the basis for an honest-to-goodness relationship drama. Of course, with Jonze, nothing is that simple. Her, the first film he’s written himself, isn’t another Charlie Kauffman mind puzzle, but its emotions are no easier to untangle, nor to categorize. Is it sci-fi? Horror? Satire? Or is a story about falling in love with binary code the only honest way to talk about modern romance? Because Her is a modern story, or close enough. It’s set in a near-future Los Angeles that looks like present-day Tokyo, except populated by white 30-somethings who all dress like Palm Beach retirees. Let’s call it the Uncanny San Fernando Valley: It’s a society we recognize, but just askew enough to vaguely creep us out. Bluetooth has already made it difficult to parse schizophrenics from business people; now, not only is everybody talking to themselves, we’re hiring human surrogates in order to fuck our computers and copywriters to

compose our love letters. Portrayed, in actuality, by Shanghai, the city’s density—and the fact that seemingly every male has a mustache and highwaisted pants—compounds the movie’s uneasy intimacy. Though its tone is gently morose, Her is profoundly disturbing for a while. Until it isn’t. Credit Jonze for never mocking Joaquin Phoenix’s lonely former L.A. Weekly staffer-turnedemotional copywriter, even though he puts him in a ’stache-and-glasses combo out of a pedophile Halloween costume and gives him the exceptionally dweeby name Theodore Twombley. Yeah, he’s procrastinating on signing his divorce papers, and he spends his nights playing holographic video games and having phone sex, and sure, he’s dating an operating system, but he’s not ashamed: He introduces Samantha—that’s the name the OS, voiced by Scarlett Johansson, gives itself—to his goddaughter and best friend (Amy Adams) and takes her on double dates with his boss. Nobody thinks he’s crazy, and eventually, thanks to Phoenix’s warm, subtly brave performance, neither do we.

LET’S CALL IT THE UNCANNY SAN FERNANDO vALLEY. It’s hard to blame the guy, really. Some critics have suggested that casting Johansson is a form of audience manipulation, to make us unconsciously envision Samantha as a paragon of female beauty, but the brilliance of that decision is more about her voice than the idea of her body. Johansson’s husky rasp sounds lived-in and imperfect. In other words, it’s distinctly human. The Oscar talk is exaggerated, but she gives a fully realized performance, one that gradually evolves over two hours. She yearns to be a real woman, until she declares that we’re all made of the same matter, so why get into semantics? That may sound like Jonze wrote a whole movie arguing in favor of objectophilia, but that’s not what Her is about, nor is it a critique of technological dependence. It is, perhaps, a movie that is easier to think about than to watch: It’s overlong, and prone to greeting-card proverbs, such as “the heart’s not like a box that gets filled up, it expands the more you love.” But its central thought is one that will only grow more significant as the world becomes a bigger, more alienating place: Is any feeling real, or are we just programmed that way? B+ Her is rated is rated R. It opens Friday at Bagdad, Eastport, Bridgeport, Lloyd Center, Roseway.

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cold comes the night Emma’s hair. As much as response to Blue Is the Warmest Color has focused on the depictions of lesbian sex, the characters’ sexual orientation isn’t the crux of the film. It’s an epic tale of love between two people who just happen to be women, and that’s hopefully what will allow it to endure. nC-17. REBECCA JACOBSON. Living Room Theaters.

Blue Jasmine

B Woody Allen’s Blue Jasmine cannot

reconcile its broad comedy and pathos into coherence, but all the more impressive, then, that Sally Hawkins’ and Cate Blanchett’s twinned performances still manage to pick up most of the pieces. PG-13. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Laurelhurst.

Cold Comes the Night

A post-Breaking Bad Bryan Cranston keeps the criminal streak going, playing a nearly blind gangster who takes a mother and daughter hostage after a cash delivery misfires. R. Living Room Theaters.

Dallas Buyers Club

A The first time Matthew

McConaughey appears onscreen in Dallas Buyers Club, the reflex is to gasp. That carved-from-amber beach bod has been whittled down to a toothpick. It’s a transformation mirroring that of McConaughey’s career over the past year: The rom-com lothario has withered away. In his place arrives a performer at his peak, in a role that better damn well win him an Oscar, as an AIDS activist the movies have never seen before: a shit-kicking, homophobic redneck. That redneck actually existed, too. In 1985, Ron Woodroof, a Dallas electrician, bull rider and pussychasing, coke-snorting degenerate, became one of the rare straight men in the early years of the AIDS epidemic to contract HIV. Frustrated by the grinding inertia of Big Pharma, Woodroof went to Mexico, where, with a cocktail of natural supplements and non-FDA-approved meds, he was nursed back to health. Figuring there was a great racket in AIDS drugs that actually worked, he returned to Texas with the drugs and opened a “buyers club.” Woodroof may have been an asshole, but he was an asshole whose instinct for self-preservation eventually helped extend the lives of millions of better people. And, in the face of a plague, that’s worth more than one jerk’s enlightenment. R. MATTHEW SINGER. Cinema 21.

Despicable Me 2

C This sequel to 2010’s blockbuster adds Kristen Wiig as high-spirited love interest and expands the animated repertoire to encompass 3-D thrills, but the story itself, which shoehorns Gru into the service of a global superspy league for the flimsiest of reasons, arrives packed with exposition and shorn of coherency. PG. JAY HORTON. Valley, Academy.

Ender’s Game

B- There’s no denying that Orson

Scott Card’s political and anti-gay views are worse than cockeyed. Still, Gavin Hood’s adaptation of Card’s 1985 sci-fi novel deserves notice: It makes clear how salient and eerily

prescient the author used to be, back before he was equating Obama with Hitler. In this speculative future, Earth is at war with an alien insectoid race, and children have become the military’s best shot at victory. Hood keeps a firm handle on the film’s somber tone, ensuring we’re never once at ease with the sadistic environment. PG-13. CURTIS WOLOSCHUK. Valley, Academy.

Enough Said

A- Nicole Holofcener’s Enough Said

is a rare thing: a portrait of middleaged romance that feels genuine in its baby steps and lurches, the hesitations of people out of practice. Julia Louis-Dreyfus’ comedy is rooted in missed opportunity and sudden regret, Keener’s often in the brittle judgment of the alpha female. James Gandolfini’s? Apparently it comes from love. In his final role, he shows a tenderness and good-natured humor that imbues the film with an extra layer of pathos: that we will not know him this way again. One of his last lines in the film is “I’ve missed you.” Well, I’ll miss him, too. PG-13. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Laurelhurst.

Frozen

B Widely hailed as a return to the classic animated features of yore, Frozen arrives as an uncomplicated triumph of traditionalism, for better or worse. A musical-theater retelling of classic Hans Christian Andersen tale The Snow Queen, hidebound Disney preservationists were worried the decidedly modern title foretold the goofy revisionism of 2010’s Rapunzel fan-fic Tangled. But there’s a far easier explanation for the name change: Once again, it’s all about the princesses. Kristen Bell’s Anna takes center stage as a rambunctious royal eagerly awaiting the social possibilities accompanying her older sister’s imminent coronation. Compared to the pandering messiness of most kids’ movies, there’s plenty to excite the family-friendly faithful. Widescreen 3-D visuals sculpt an endlessly inventive setting of ice palaces and snowcapped peaks, the original songs written by veterans of Avenue Q and The Book of Mormon soar and tickle as needed, and snowman sidekick Olaf giddily beats back the encroaching melodrama. It’s the sort of Disney film even Disney barely makes anymore, as majestic and problematic as a sudden snowfall, and, like all blizzards of youth, we’ll mourn its passing. PG. JAY HORTON. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Indoor Twin, Lloyd Mall.

Getting to Know You(Tube)

[ONE NIGHT ONLY] A guided tour through the depths of YouTube. ZOMG! BABY ANIMALS! Hollywood Theatre. 7:30 pm Monday, Jan. 13.

The Great Beauty

A The Great Beauty begins with a

cannonball, followed closely by a heart attack, and concludes with a 104-yearold toothless nun crawling on her knees up the steps of a church. Paolo Sorrentino’s luxuriously sprawling film is both enchanted and repulsed by the decadence it depicts, a tension that makes for one of the richest cinematic experiences of the year. At the center

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is Jep Gambardella (a wondrous Toni Servillo), a 65-year-old hedonist who wrote an acclaimed novel as a young man and now spends his days (and nights) living large in Rome. Toward the beginning of the film, he learns that his first love has died, which jolts him down a path of grief, nostalgia and, because he’s at times a pompous cad, pride. That journey is a sensuous feast, scored by haunting choral music and techno mariachi, and marked by appearances by washed-up socialites, a blue-haired dwarf, vanishing giraffes and dreadful performance artists, including a woman who runs naked and blindfolded into a stone wall. The loosely connected vignettes can meander, but taken together they compose a fascinating portrait of Berlusconi’s Italy, one that is too consumed by orgiastic terrace parties and neverending conga lines to realize how stagnant it’s become. REBECCA JACOBSON. Living Room Theaters.

Grudge Match

D During the enfeebled showdown that caps Peter Segal’s “grumpy old men come to blows” dramedy, television announcers remind us that old rivals Henry “Razor” Sharp (Sylvester Stallone) and Billy “The Kid” McDonnen (Robert De Niro) both walked away from boxing while at the height of their powers and with virtually unblemished records. Having endured almost two insufferable hours of punishingly lame gags and limp training montages (rest assured, raw eggs are as disgusting as ever), viewers can’t help but be taunted by a “what if?” scenario in which these screen icons demonstrate a similar desire to go out on top. With Stallone moping nobly and De Niro mugging shamelessly, their demeanors rarely suggest that 30 years of resentment are reaching a simmer, much less a boil. The other relationships are similarly unconvincing, with Stallone’s romance with Kim Basinger (seemingly in an opioid haze) proving spectacularly anemic. In turn, the seniors’ climactic bout might be the most dispiriting scene to unfold in a boxing ring since a broken-down Mike Tyson surrendered to Kevin McBride back in 2005. At least Tyson had the decency to admit it was just a cash grab. PG13. CURTIS WOLOSCHUK. Eastport, Clackamas.

post-apocalyptic universe where children are forced to slay one another in an annual gladiatorial event. This film finds heroine Katniss (Jennifer Lawrence) and her milquetoast cochamp Peeta (Josh Hutcherson) on a “victory tour” through a country where the rich bathe in luxury while the poor undergo flogging and execution in what resembles WWII-era Russia. As with the first film, Catching Fire goes slightly flat once the actual Hunger Games commence. But in the lead-up to the most violent episode of Survivor imaginable, the director crafts a dense dystopia full of political allegory, media satire and other elements that most YA films consider their core audiences too dumb to handle. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Eastport, Clackamas, Cedar Hills, Cornelius, Oak Grove.

In No Great Hurry: 13 Lessons in Life With Saul Leiter

B [THREE NIGHTS ONLY] “I’m being sincere when I say I’ve never been driven,” says Saul Leiter. They’re surprising words from a photographer who produced such a compelling and cohesive body of work. Marked by bold colors set against gray cityscapes, Leiter’s work was shown at MoMA and commissioned for Harper’s Bazaar. In Tomas Leach’s documentary, we meet Leiter toward the end of his life—he died last November at age 89—as he looks through old keepsakes in his New York City studio, explores surrounding neighborhoods and goes to his local printer. “A window covered with raindrops interests me more than a photograph of a famous person,” Leiter says. Perhaps in an attempt to mimic Leiter’s photography, Leach laces his film with obscure compositions, showing the back of Leiter’s head behind stark architectural lines, and images of stagnant urban objects. At one point, he allows Leiter to muse philosophically about the curiosi-

ties of ordinary life while nothing but a half-empty coffee cup appears on the screen. But this approach lacks the revealing perspective of Leiter’s photographs. In No Great Hurry ultimately becomes a long Q&A, probably doomed to rest in the documentary section of Netflix, uncovered only by photo enthusiasts. LYLA ROWEN. Clinton Street Theater. 7 pm TuesdayThursday, Jan. 14-16.

Inside Llewyn Davis

B+ Lovable losers abound in the films

of Joel and Ethan Coen. Even the most ardent admirer of Raising Arizona’s H.I. McDunnough or The Big Lebowski’s the Dude would be hard-pressed to call either man conventionally successful. But that’s kind of the point: The old adage about loving someone for his flaws holds true in these cases. Keep that in mind when you meet the title character of Inside Llewyn Davis. A down-on-his-luck folk musician in 1961 New York City, Llewyn (Oscar Isaac) crashes on friends’ squeaky couches, gigs at the Gaslight Cafe and mills about while waiting for his big break. Witnessing all this unfold is, in a word, lovely. That may seem an odd way to describe such a bittersweet portrait of failure and disenchantment, but the Coens are experts in drawing out the bitter and the sweet in nearly equal measure. When Llewyn eventually sees the words “What are you doing?” written on a restroom stall, he seems genuinely taken aback. As the viewer, getting to share in Llewyn’s struggle to answer that question in any meaningful way is more than worth the accompanying sorrow. R. MICHAEL NORDINE. Fox Tower, Clackamas, CineMagic, Lloyd Mall.

La Camioneta: The Journey of One American School Bus

A- [ONE DAY ONLY] The journey of the yellow school bus goes far

REVIEW CLAIRE FOLGER

C O U R T E S Y O F S A S Q U ATC H F I L M S

MOVIES

The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

B+ When last we saw Bilbo Baggins (Martin Freeman) and his band of dwarves, they were headed to confront a dragon. But along the way, they also took an awful lot of time to do the dishes and sing songs seemingly stolen from Led Zeppelin. That was a central complaint about Peter Jackson’s first entry in his Hobbit trilogy, and it made fans wonder whether swelling J.R.R. Tolkien’s shortest book into three films would result in stagnation. That fear goes flying out the window like a decapitated orc head in The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug, which justifies its nearly threehour runtime not by cramming in tons of story, but by allowing the action pieces to play out with the lunacy of an ultraviolent Looney Tunes short. And so we have our heroes floating downriver in barrels as a battle between elves and orcs rages overhead, and a freaky showdown with an army of spiders. It all leads up to a confrontation with the titular dragon, who instantly becomes the most terrifyingly beautiful winged beast ever put to film. It wouldn’t be a Tolkien film without the self-seriousness, but The Desolation of Smaug never loses its sense of fun, forgoing the confusingly labyrinthine setup of its predecessor in favor of watching its heroes escape ridiculous peril time and time again. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Eastport, Clackamas, Cedar Hills, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove.

The Hunger Games: Catching Fire

B Taking what initially seemed like

a watered-down version of Battle Royale, The Hunger Games series has created a sprawling and very grown-up world for young audiences. With Catching Fire, director Francis Lawrence further expands this

CLAWS OUT: In August: Osage County, Meryl Streep is a pillpopping Tyrannosaurus rex in a black bouffant wig. Julia Roberts is a weather-parched velociraptor in mom jeans. And when these mother-daughter dinosaurs go at it, expect things to break: mostly dinner plates, but also hearts, eardrums and any shred of goodwill that survives in this seriously twisted family. Alongside all that destruction, don’t be surprised if your patience breaks as well: This screen adaptation of Tracy Letts’ Pulitzer Prize-winning play operates at such a consistently high pitch that it numbs rather than blisters. The film finds a family reunited in northern Oklahoma following the death (it’s presumed a suicide, and we can hardly blame him) of Beverly Weston, a hard-drinking poet. His wife, Violet (Streep), suffers from mouth cancer, but that doesn’t stop her from spewing endless streams of bilious invective at her three daughters. Letts’ play won raves for its ability to imbue soap opera-style revelations with fiery humor, but John Wells’ directorial hand is so weak that the film just plays as a succession of histrionic showdowns. Streep exceeds even her own stratospheric standards for scenery-chewing, purloining any sense of surprise from her character. As the oldest daughter, Roberts fares somewhat better, with a few moments so arrestingly aggressive you might forgive what’s come before. But then another plate shatters and, with it, any sense of charity. REBECCA JACOBSON. C SEE IT: August: Osage County is rated R. It opens Friday at Cedar Hills, Moreland, Lloyd Mall.

MOVIES

GREG PETERS

jan. 8–14

lone survivor beyond carting snotty preteens five miles to middle school and back. After 10-year tours of duty in the U.S., buses are driven to Central America, where they become camionetas. The story of one such bus, from Midwestern auction to busy Guatemalan route and all the ambitious businessmen in between, is the focus of Mark Kendall’s beautifully shot documentary La Camioneta. Meticulously chromed and repainted, equipped with a roof rack and, on special occasions, outfitted with icons of St. Christopher and palm fronds, this camioneta bears little outward resemblance to its forebear. But, as is hinted by banal aphorisms (“Life is a journey!”), these buses foster an international connection, even if American drivers don’t have to pay off gangs to continue working. Superb pacing is the key to La Camioneta’s success: It keeps on truckin’. MITCH LILLIE. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 5 and 7 pm Saturday, Jan. 11.

Lone Survivor

C Reading about the true events that inspired Lone Survivor brought a tear to my eye. Watching Peter Berg’s movie made me queasy. The film centers on 2005’s failed Operation Red Wings—a mission to remove a high-profile Taliban target in the mountains of Afghanistan that instead resulted in the death of 19 American soldiers—and it lionizes its heroes while utterly demonizing their enemies. Berg clearly has nothing but reverence for the armed forces, but that admiration renders him incapable of portraying anything dispassionately: Lone Survivor has little more nuance than the average recruitment poster. The film aims to show the soldiers’ personalities via their response to the dire situation—they’re vastly outnumbered, with malfunctioning communications equipment and nowhere to go. It’s a battle-heavy approach that only occasionally works. We know these guys, played by Mark Wahlberg, Taylor Kitsch, Ben Foster and Emile Hirsch. They are tough and fiercely loyal to one another, but the characterization largely stops there. It’s a Passion of the Christ-like flogging in which Berg shows every graphic detail of the soldiers’ ordeal, but examines nothing of what made them so impressive in the first place. R. MICHAEL NORDINE. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Lloyd Center, Tigard, Wilsonville.

Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom

C Arriving with morbidly perfect

timing, this by-the-numbers biopic about the recently deceased South African leader tries for Gandhi greatness but fails to hit any sort of mark. Dutifully marching through a highlights reel of Nelson Mandela’s life, Justin Chadwick’s film isn’t savvy enough to investigate any of the more compelling narrative threads. Why did Mandela’s second wife, Winnie, grow increasingly radical even as her husband moved away from such tactics? How did political ideals butt up against prag-

matic concerns during the negotiations for Mandela’s freedom? Instead, Chadwick cuts between stirring speeches and soft-focus flashbacks, with occasional context-free bursts of archival footage tossed in seemingly for the hell of it. Idris Elba, despite looking far too much like a linebacker to bear much of a physical resemblance to the real man, successfully adopts Mandela’s commanding presence and distinctive speech patterns, but he can’t save a film so hagiographic and uninspired. PG-13. REBECCA JACOBSON. Lloyd Mall.

Mantrap

[ONE NIGHT ONLY, REVIVAL] The NW Film Center goes silent with a double feature of Victor Fleming’s 1926 classic, Mantrap, and the 1928 melodrama, Midnight Madness. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 6:30 pm Sunday, Jan. 12.

My French Film Festival

[THREE NIGHTS ONLY] The Clinton Street Theater hosts three days of screenings for Francophiles, with six contemporary French movies ranging from comedies set on the Italian Riviera to dramas about larcenous teenagers. Clinton Street Theater. 7 and 9 pm Friday-Sunday, Jan. 10-12.

Nebraska

C Alexander Payne has built his brilliant career on examinations of pathetic characters—and I mean that literally, not pejoratively. In the black-and-white Nebraska, a combination Valentine and fuck-you to his home state, he continues this project, but to dishearteningly flat results. David (Will Forte) decides to accompany his near-senile father, Woody (Bruce Dern), with whom he has a fractious relationship, on a road trip from Montana to Nebraska to claim the million-dollar magazine sweepstakes prize Woody believes he’s won. Payne’s typically trenchant observations on humanity’s soft underbelly feel broad, perhaps due to his non-involvement in the script, a first. Instead, the film rests on lazy humor, forced provocations and ingratiating moments of fatherson bonding. It’s disappointing to see Payne succumb to sentimentality untempered by insight or depth. R. KRISTI MITSUDA. Hollywood Theatre.

No Time to Think

[ONE NIGHT ONLY, DIRECTOR ATTENDING] Local filmmaker Brian Huston screens his new documentary about technological obsessions and the impact of all the time we spend staring at screens. Hollywood Theatre. 7 pm Wednesday, Jan. 8.

Out of the Furnace

B+ Scott Cooper’s Out of the

Furnace centers on two blue-collar brothers: the elder Russell (Christian Bale), an everyman who is involved in a horrific tragedy that lands him in prison; and Rodney (Casey Affleck), an Iraq War vet struggling to acclimate to civilian life who turns to bare-knuckle boxing in an attempt to make ends meet.

Were the film to focus solely on the brothers, it would be a solid, if slightly dull, meditation on returning to a mundane existence after a life of extremes. Cooper, whose freshman film, Crazy Heart, coaxed a career-best performance out of Jeff Bridges, handles the expansion from quiet character study to mosaic thriller with panache. By focusing on the anguish of characters forced to drastic measures, Cooper spins a sophisticated tale that never resorts to melodrama. R. AP KRYZA. Academy.

Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones

Another tale of a family stalked by demonic forces. R. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove.

Philomena

C- The hardest part about watching Philomena, a film based on the true story of an Irish woman’s search for the son she gave up for adoption 50 years previous, is accepting the amazing Judi Dench as a bumbling simpleton in the title role. “We don’t have Mexicans in England—we have Indians,” she excitedly explains to the Mexican-American cooks. If you can get over Dench as Grandma Goof, then Philomena stands on its own two feet. One of those feet is the enthralling storyline. Philomena and Martin Sixsmith (Steve Coogan), a political journalist who’s taken on his first human-interest story, uncover secrets both cloistered in the nunnery where Philomena’s child was born and spread across America, where her son was taken as a child. Unfortunately, the other foot is the waiter-my-soup humor that Fawlty Towers made irrelevant four decades ago. After the film ends, it’s Philomena’s story that sticks. Director Stephen Frears and company should be given credit only for staying out of the real Philomena’s way. PG-13. MITCH LILLIE. Cinema 21, Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Lloyd Mall.

The Punk Singer

A Kathleen Hanna’s life story is

stuffed with enough incident and drama to fill a week’s worth of feature-length documentaries. She survived a strange and sometimes abusive upbringing, turned to feminist art and music as a means of self-expression, and fomented what she deemed “Revolution Grrl Style Now” through her bands Bikini Kill and Le Tigre. And for the past eight years, Hanna has dealt with the effects of Lyme disease. Director Sini Anderson hones this epic life journey into a film that is as empowered, energetic and fierce as its subject. ROBERT HAM. Living Room Theaters.

Saving Mr. Banks

C Disney movies walk a fine line between warm-and-fuzzy feelgoodery and all-out cheese, but few straddle the line as frustratingly as Saving Mr. Banks. This is, after all, a film that casts Tom Hanks as Walt

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Hunger Games: Catching Fire, The (PG-13) 12:00PM 3:30PM 7:00PM 10:20PM Inside Llewyn Davis (R) 11:25AM 2:10PM 4:55PM 7:30PM 10:10PM 47 Ronin 3D (PG-13) 1:55PM 4:45PM 7:35PM 10:35PM Legend Of Hercules, The 3D (PG-13) 2:20PM 4:50PM 7:20PM 47 Ronin (PG-13) 11:05AM Legend Of Hercules, The (PG-13) 11:45AM 9:55PM American Hustle (R) 12:45PM 3:55PM 7:05PM Lone Survivor (R) 12:15PM 3:15PM 6:15PM 9:15PM 10:20PM Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones (R) 11:50AM Anchorman 2 (PG-13) 11:05AM 1:55PM 4:50PM 1:05PM 2:15PM 3:25PM 4:30PM 5:45PM 6:45PM 7:50PM 10:40PM 8:05PM 9:10PM 10:30PM Frozen (2013) 3D (PG) 11:40AM 2:25PM 5:05PM Frozen (2013) (PG) 11:00AM 1:40PM 4:25PM 7:10PM Philomena (PG-13) 11:30AM 2:05PM 4:40PM 7:15PM Saving Mr Banks (PG-13) 1:15PM 4:15PM 7:20PM 9:50PM Gravity 3D (PG-13) 12:30PM 3:00PM 5:25PM 8:00PM 10:15PM Secret Life Of Walter Mitty, The (PG) 11:10AM 2:00PM 10:25PM 5:00PM 7:45PM 10:35PM Grudge Match (PG-13) 7:45PM 10:30PM Tyler Perry’s A Madea Christmas (PG-13) 9:45PM Her (R) 1:00PM 4:00PM 7:00PM 10:00PM Walking with Dinosaurs 3D (PG) 2:15PM 7:05PM Hobbit: Desolation Of Smaug, The 3D (PG-13) Walking with Dinosaurs (PG) 11:55AM 4:35PM 2:55PM 10:05PM 9:35PM Hobbit: Desolation Of Smaug, The (PG-13) 11:15AM Wolf Of Wall Street, The (R) 12:05PM 4:10PM 8:15PM 6:30PM

Lone Survivor XD (R) 11:00AM 1:50PM 4:45PM 7:40PM 10:40PM

1-Nenokkadine (NR) 7:00PM 10:15PM 47 Ronin—3D (PG-13) 7:00PM 9:40PM American Hustle (R) 12:40PM 3:50PM 7:00PM 10:10PM Anchorman 2 (PG-13) 11:15AM 2:00PM 4:45PM 7:35PM 10:25PM August: Osage County (R) 11:15AM 2:00PM 4:45PM 7:30PM 10:15PM Frozen (2013)—3D (PG) 11:00AM 1:40PM 4:20PM Frozen (2013) (PG) 12:20PM 3:00PM 5:40PM 8:20PM Her (R) 10:55AM 1:50PM 4:45PM 7:40PM 10:35PM Hobbit: Desolation Of Smaug, The—3D (PG-13) 2:30PM 9:30PM Hobbit: Desolation Of Smaug, The (PG-13) 11:00AM 6:00PM

Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG-13) 12:30PM 3:45PM 7:00PM 10:10PM Legend Of Hercules, The—3D (PG-13) 12:20PM 2:45PM 7:35PM Legend Of Hercules, The (PG-13) 5:10PM 10:00PM Lone Survivor (R) 11:10AM 2:05PM 4:55PM 7:45PM 10:35PM Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones (R) 11:40AM 12:45PM 1:50PM 2:55PM 4:00PM 5:05PM 6:10PM 7:15PM 8:20PM 9:25PM 10:30PM Philomena (PG-13) 11:45AM 2:10PM 4:35PM Saving Mr Banks (PG-13) 11:00AM 1:50PM 4:40PM 7:30PM 10:20PM Secret Life Of Walter Mitty, The (PG) 11:15AM 2:00PM 4:45PM 7:35PM 10:25PM Wolf Of Wall Street, The (R) 12:30PM 4:15PM 8:00PM

No A.M. shows Mon–Thur Yevadu (Mythri LLC)—it is a Telugu movie Premier/pre show Fri 1/10 at 9 pm - $18 adult and $10 kids Regular shows start Sat 1/11 - $15 adult and $8 kids 6pm and 930pm Hunger Games: Catching Fire, The (PG-13) 11:30AM 3:00PM 6:40PM 10:05PM Legend Of Hercules, The 3D (PG-13) 11:00AM 4:30PM 7:15PM Wolf Of Wall Street, The (R) 12:10PM 4:15PM 8:20PM Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug, The (PG-13) 11:00AM 2:40PM 6:25PM 10:00PM Legend Of Hercules, The (PG-13) 1:45PM 10:00PM Saving Mr Banks (PG-13) 12:00PM 3:10PM 6:20PM 9:30PM Secret Life Of Walter Mitty, The (PG) 11:05AM 1:55PM 4:55PM 7:40PM 10:30PM

Lone Survivor (R) 12:30PM 3:45PM 7:00PM 10:15PM Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones (R) 10:55AM 1:15PM 3:35PM 5:50PM 8:10PM 10:25PM 47 Ronin (PG-13) 2:00PM 4:50PM American Hustle (R) 12:20PM 3:40PM 7:05PM 10:20PM Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug, The 3D (PG-13) 12:45PM 4:25PM 8:15PM 47 Ronin 3D (PG-13) 11:10AM 7:40PM 10:30PM Anchorman 2 (PG-13) 11:00AM 1:50PM 4:40PM 7:30PM 10:20PM Grudge Match (PG-13) 11:20AM 2:10PM 5:00PM 7:45PM 10:30PM Her (R) 12:15PM 3:30PM 6:45PM 10:00PM Frozen (2013) 3D (PG) 12:05PM 3:05PM Frozen (2013) (PG) 10:50AM 1:40PM 4:25PM 7:20PM 10:10PM

Showtimes valid Friday to Thursday Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

jan. 8–14

Disney himself, struggling to get Mary Poppins made by awakening the inner child of prim, proper and persnickety British author P.L. Travers, played with eccentric hilarity by the great Emma Thompson. There’s considerable joy to be had in director John Lee Hancock’s depiction of 1960s Hollywood, and in watching Travers slowly seduced by the infectious songs that made Poppins a classic. Alas, Travers suffers more flashbacks than Timothy Leary. Each time the film hits a stride, we’re forced back to turn-of-the-century Australia to witness her upbringing with her whimsically alcoholic dad (Colin Farrell, definitely playing to character). For all its considerable joy and fantastic performances, Saving Mr. Banks gets greedy: It starts out tugging at the heartstrings but, with its strained sentimentality, eventually tears a ventricle. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Oak Grove.

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

D+ The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

is a movie for anyone prone to existential crises during soft-drink commercials. Based on James Thurber’s 1939 short story about a teenage punk rocker-turned-graying office drone with severe delusional psychosis (because one can only assume director-star Ben Stiller remained totally faithful to the source material), the film adopts a long-winded motto from Life magazine as its motivational tagline-cum-greeting card message that can be easily distilled down to “Do the Dew, brah!” Spurred by a shitty new boss (Adam Scott with General Zod facial hair), love interest (Kristen Wiig, less phoning in her performance than texting it while in line at the post office) and spirit animal (Sean Penn), Stiller’s Mitty sets off to make his vivid daydreams into reality. Soon he’s bounding through airports to the tune of Arcade Fire, leaping out of helicopters, fighting sharks and skateboarding toward erupting volcanoes. The thing quickly blows up into an extended Super Bowl ad break— complete with promotions for eHarmony, Papa John’s, Cinnabon and whatever cellphone carrier has coverage in the Himalayas—with all the heart and genuine emotion that suggests. PG. MATTHEW SINGER. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Lloyd Mall.

The Selfish Giant

A- On the heels of Clio Barnard’s

hailed debut, The Arbor, comes the equally devastating The Selfish Giant, in which the British writer-director again depicts a generation failed by an unsympathetic system. From the very first frame, Barnard so assuredly and imaginatively captures an abandoned underclass that viewers will be hard-pressed to connect the script to its Oscar Wilde origins—Dickens pops to mind much more quickly. But Barnard’s screenplay was indeed inspired by a fable by Wilde, and she transplants that story’s garden to the contemporary, post-industrial wasteland of the northern English countryside. For adolescent hothead Arbor (Conner Chapman) and his pudgy pal Swifty (Shaun Thomas), it’s obvious life isn’t going to get any better, especially after Arbor’s incessant tantrums get them expelled from school. The duo resorts to scavenging metal, which they sell to a dodgy, violent man named Kitten (Sean Gilder). Barnard’s post-Thatcher social realism is hyperspecific, and she harnesses such astonishing performances from Chapman and Thomas that we wish they could have enjoyed a bit more time in Wilde’s garden before being spat into the scraps. AMANDA SCHURR. Living Room Theaters.

The Song of Styrene

[ONE NIGHT ONLY, REVIVAL] The NW Film Center continues its series of documentaries about the production and distribution of ordinary goods with Alain Resnais’ 1959 meditation on plastic. The 19-minute film will be shown alongside John Smith’s Slow Glass, about a glazier musing on both glassmaking and much larger themes. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7 pm Friday, Jan. 10.

Targeting Iran

AP FILM STUDIES

C [ONE NIGHT ONLY, DIRECTOR

ATTENDING] With an approach that feels ready-made for an introductory Middle Eastern studies course, Targeting Iran attempts to explain misconceptions about the Western Asian nation. Portland director Andy Norris bases his documentary on a book of the same name by David Barsamian and Noam Chomsky, and the film leans heavily on talking-head interviews with professors, journalists and the authors of the book itself. Though we glimpse a few archival photos— of the Iran-Iraq War, for example, and of everyday life in Tehran—we generally hear far more than we see about Iran’s history, culture, nuclear aspirations and relationship (or lack thereof) with the United States. Trita Parsi, founder of the National Iranian American Council, argues that the U.S. needs to establish public diplomacy with Iran that is patient and longterm. It’s not just about nuclear issues, Parsi says, but about human rights and regional issues as well. Targeting Iran is a classic case of TMI: Norris tries to pack a 272-page book into 71 minutes of film, and the resulting documentary starts to burst at the seams. SAVANNAH WASSERMAN. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7 pm Thursday, Jan. 9.

Thor: The Dark World

C Thor is Marvel’s most unidentifiable character, but his first solo cinematic outing worked because of how hilariously batshit it was. 2011’s Thor was part goofball sci-fi epic, part fish-out-of-water comedy set in small-town New Mexico, anchored by Chris Hemsworth’s charmingly boyish performance. Thor: The Dark World reverses the formula, transporting Thor’s scientist girlfriend (Natalie Portman) to his psychedelic space kingdom. But director Alan Taylor sucks all the fun out of the picture, creating a cornball drama that plays a lot like one of his episodes of Game of Thrones, minus the incest but with spaceships. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Academy, Valley.

Tyler Perry’s A Madea Christmas

The pistol-packing, cantankerous grandma goes to the country for the holidays. PG-13. Clackamas.

Walking With Dinosaurs

Giant dinosaurs POKING YOU IN THE EYE. PG. Clackamas.

Weird Science

[ONE WEEK ONLY, REVIVAL] It doesn’t have the harsh-but-true lessons of the rest of John Hughes’ catalog, but Weird Science does have Robert Downey Jr. with a bra on his head. R. Laurelhurst Theater.

The Wolf of Wall Street

A Martin Scorsese’s best picture

since Goodfellas and his fifth with Leonardo DiCaprio is at once hilarious, terrifying, hallucinogenic, infuriating, awe-inspiring, meandering and, at three hours, utterly exhausting. It’s also (in this critic’s opinion) the best movie of the year, possibly DiCaprio’s finest work and the bitch slap that Wall Street deserves—even if the true but ludicrous story of financial criminal, stock-market juggernaut and rampant drug addict Jordan Belfort could inspire others to aspire to his level of douchebaggery. This is a man who makes Gordon Gecko seem like Mother Teresa. With his buddies, he runs roughshod over the financial well-being of rich and poor alike and creates for himself a world of drugaddled debauchery that makes Hunter S. Thompson’s escapades seem like a college freshman’s. Some may scoff at the runtime, or at the film’s episodic look into Belfort’s debauchery, but both just serve to further pummel you into submission as our “hero” glides through a privileged life with a steady diet of Quaaludes, cocaine, hookers, alcohol, sushi and hubris. It is a modern masterpiece of excess, style and lunacy. R. AP KRYZA. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Hollywood Theatre, Oak Grove.

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

COURTESY OF TWIN TWIN PEAKS

MOVIES

LOG JAM

shhhhhhh!: Wendy Red star plays the Log Lady in Twin Twin Peaks.

TWIN PEAKS GETS AN ALTERNATE REALITY. BY aP kRYza

apkryza@wweek.com

What the hell happened to the Log Lady? For two decades, fans of Twin Peaks have struggled with abandonment, forced to live in a world where we know not the fate of the backwoods soothsayer who carried around a spiritharboring hunk of timber. When David Lynch’s surrealistic, disturbing and utterly batshit soap opera debuted in 1990, it was a hit, mainly because nobody had ever seen anything like it. But as things got weirder and weirder, it became clear that the fever dream—which, it should be noted, aired on primetime network TV and pitted its themes of incest, murder and surrealism against Cheers—was to be short-lived. After two seasons, it was off the air. It’s unlikely Lynch will ever revisit that creepy Washington mill town, but the beauty of modern fandom is that true believers have the resources and equipment to say “fuck it” and do it themselves. And so we have Twin Twin Peaks, a fan-made episode billing itself as the third-season premiere. It features a lot of familiar names—Special Agent Dale Cooper, Log Lady, sexpot Audrey Horne and ol’ Doc Hayward all right—with a lot of unfamiliar faces (Sheriff Harry S. Truman might have undergone gender reassignment surgery). The 18-minute film—shot by a legion of Portland superfans who trekked to North Bend, Poulsbo and Snoqualmie in 2009—is the linchpin (pun intended) of the inaugural installment of Future So Bright, a Hollywood Theatre residency at Holocene focusing on the way Internet culture is changing cinematic presentation. In addition to the screening, the event features a live performance of songs from the show, ranging from the weird-ass Angelo Badalamenti synth score to the weirder-ass throwback balladry of Julee Cruise. While far from a masterpiece—actors do quasiimpressions of their favorite characters and generally seem stoked to be outside the real Double R Diner—Twin Twin Peaks is a beautiful example of what fans can do with properties that fizzle. Yeah, it’s kind of like community theater. Yeah, it’s lowbudget and has no real ending (the project was ditched after one episode). To non-diehards, its existence is as puzzling as the show itself. But it’s also fan fiction at is most proactive. Today, fan-made scripts aren’t just a nerdy

endeavor, and blogs and YouTube channels are opening once-closed doors. Just look at what E.L. James did to hordes of horny housewives by eroticizing Twilight. (Actually, don’t look. It’s gross.) “When people are so invested in these stories, of course they are going to rewrite them so that they feel more interesting or satisfying to them,” Twin Twin Peaks director Helen Reed writes via email from Toronto, where she hopefully isn’t operating her own version of One Eyed Jacks. Why don’t more fans take it upon themselves to continue the stories they love? Ours is a time when directors like Park Chan-wook experiment with shooting films on iPhones. GoPros have found their way into cinemas courtesy of experimental filmmakers working on the cheap. We have the opportunity to find out what happened to Remo Williams after his film’s title, The Adventure Begins, turned out to be a bluff, or what occurred once Ben and Elaine disembarked their bus in The Graduate. Wait, never mind. Let’s not find that out. But somewhere, there’s a Dustin Hoffman enthusiast with a camcorder and a MILF-y aunt. If nothing else, Twin Twin Peaks assures us the Log Lady is alive and well two decades after we last received her wisdom. And that’s comfort enough. Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison St., 239-7639. 9:30 pm Tuesday, Jan. 14. Free. also showinG: The Hollywood teams up with Mississippi Studios for a sun Ra double feature, with the jazz demigod, philosopher and all-around ethereal being fighting an intergalactic pimp. Hollywood Theatre. 7:30 pm Thursday, Jan. 9. Something of a companion piece to 12 Years a Slave, The Jerk chronicles the plight and triumphs of a “poor black child” navigating the rigors of farm life and the temptations of the modern metropolis. It’s as funny and casually offensive as it was in 1979. Academy Theater. Jan 10-15. It’s hard to imagine censors found Stanley Kubrick’s final film, Eyes Wide Shut, so debauched that they made him digitally insert furniture to conceal the nudity. Maybe they were so fucking bored they needed something to think about to avoid dozing off. 5th Avenue Cinema. Jan 10-12. Michael Powell’s 1948 musical opus The Red Shoes isn’t just one of the trippiest and most ethereal films of its era—it might also tell you what your grandma was keeping in that little silver tin she took to the bathroom at the movies. Hollywood Theatre. 2 pm Saturday-Sunday, Jan 11-12. Cool as Ice is Vanilla Ice’s second-best film, right behind Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze. A hip-hop remake of The Wild One, it proves that no, Mr. Robert Van Winkle could not have been a contender. This is what Hecklevision was made for. Hollywood Theatre. 9:30 pm Saturday, Jan. 11.

MOVIES

JAN. 10–16

COURTESY OF UNIVERSAL PICTURES

Regal Cinemas Bridgeport Village Stadium 18 & IMAX

7329 SW Bridgeport Road, 800-326-3264 THE LEGEND OF HERCULES Fri-Sat-Sun 11:15, 04:35, 09:45 THE LEGEND OF HERCULES 3D Fri-Sat-Sun 02:00, 07:40 LONE SURVIVOR Fri-Sat-Sun 11:00, 01:45, 04:45, 07:20, 10:20 HER Fri-Sat-Sun 12:30, 03:45, 06:45, 10:15

Century Clackamas Town Center and XD

RAGS TO RICHES: The Jerk plays Jan. 10-16 at the Academy Theater.

Regal Lloyd Center 10 & IMAX

1510 NE Multnomah St., 800326-3264 LONE SURVIVOR Fri-SatSun 12:50, 03:50, 06:50, 09:50 HER Fri-Sat-Sun 12:10, 03:20, 06:40, 09:40

Regal Lloyd Mall 8

2320 Lloyd Center Mall, 800-326-3264 AUGUST: OSAGE COUNTY Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:35, 02:40, 05:45, 08:10 MANDELA: LONG WALK TO FREEDOM Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:30, 08:00 47 RONIN Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:55 47 RONIN 3D Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:50, 02:50, 07:55 THE SECRET LIFE OF WALTER MITTY Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 11:40, 02:30, 05:20, 08:50 ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 11:45, 02:45, 05:40, 08:35 INSIDE LLEWYN DAVIS Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 12:00, 02:35, 05:15, 08:55 PHILOMENA Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 02:55, 05:30 FROZEN Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:05, 03:00, 06:00, 08:45 THE HUNGER GAMES: CATCHING FIRE Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:55, 03:15, 07:00

Regal Division Street Stadium 13 16603 SE Division St., 800-326-3264 THE LEGEND OF HERCULES Fri 02:00, 10:05 THE LEGEND OF HERCULES 3D Fri 11:30, 04:40, 07:25 LONE SURVIVOR Fri 12:30, 03:30, 07:00, 10:00 HER Fri 12:20, 03:20, 07:10, 10:10

Bagdad Theater and Pub

3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-249-7474 HER Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 12:15, 03:30, 07:00, 10:15

Clinton Street Theater

2522 SE Clinton St., 503-238-8899 MOBILE HOME Fri 07:00 AVANT QUE MON COEUR BASCULE Fri 09:00 J’ENRAGE DE SON ABSENCE Sat 07:00 PAULINE DéTECTIVE Sat 09:00 LA TRAVIATA AT THE OPERA FESTIVAL ST. MARGARETHEN Sun 01:00 COMME UN LION Sun 07:00 LA FILLE DU 14 JUILLET Sun 09:00 GATHR PREVIEW SERIES Mon 07:00 IN NO GREAT HURRY: 13 LESSONS IN LIFE WITH SAUL LEITER Tue-Wed 07:00

Moreland Theatre

6712 SE Milwaukie Ave., 503236-5257 AUGUST: OSAGE COUNTY Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:30, 08:00

Oak Grove 8 Cinemas

16100 SE McLoughlin Blvd., 503-653-9999 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:20, 03:40, 07:00, 10:15 PARANORMAL ACTIVITY: THE MARKED ONES FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:15, 03:20, 05:25, 07:30, 09:35 LONE SURVIVOR Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 01:50, 04:30, 07:15, 09:55 AMERICAN HUSTLE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 01:15, 04:15, 07:10, 10:05 SAVING MR. BANKS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 01:10, 04:00, 06:45, 09:30 ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:45, 04:25, 07:20, 10:00 47 RONIN Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 01:25, 04:05, 06:50, 09:35 THE WOLF OF WALL STREET Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:40, 04:20, 08:00

Roseway Theatre

7229 NE Sandy Blvd., 503-282-2898 HER Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 01:30, 04:45, 08:00

St. Johns Cinemas

8704 N Lombard St., 503-286-1768 AMERICAN HUSTLE Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:45, 08:30 ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:25, 07:55

CineMagic Theatre

2021 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-231-7919 INSIDE LLEWYN DAVIS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:30, 07:45, 09:55

Century 16 Eastport Plaza

4040 SE 82nd Ave., 800-326-3264-952 THE WOLF OF WALL STREET Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 12:10, 04:15, 08:20 THE HUNGER GAMES: CATCHING FIRE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 03:00, 06:40, 10:05 SAVING MR. BANKS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 12:00, 03:10, 06:20, 09:30 THE SECRET LIFE OF WALTER MITTY FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:55, 04:55, 07:40, 10:30 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 02:40, 06:25, 10:00 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION

OF SMAUG 3D Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:45, 04:25, 08:15 FROZEN Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 01:40, 04:25, 07:20, 10:10 FROZEN 3D Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:05, 03:05 AMERICAN HUSTLE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 12:20, 03:40, 07:05, 10:20 GRUDGE MATCH Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 02:10, 05:00, 07:45, 10:30 ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:50, 04:40, 07:30, 10:20 PARANORMAL ACTIVITY: THE MARKED ONES FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:15, 03:35, 05:50, 08:10, 10:25 HER Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 12:15, 03:30, 06:45, 10:00 LONE SURVIVOR Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 12:30, 03:45, 07:00, 10:15 47 RONIN Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 02:00, 04:50 47 RONIN 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:40, 10:30 THE LEGEND OF HERCULES Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:45, 10:00 THE LEGEND OF HERCULES 3D Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 04:30, 07:15

Empirical Theatre at OMSI

1945 SE Water Ave., 503-797-4000 MYSTERIES OF THE UNSEEN WORLD FriSat-Sun 11:00, 03:00 JERUSALEM Fri-Sat-Sun 01:00 GREAT WHITE SHARK Fri-Sat-Sun 12:00, 04:00 GRAVITY 3D Fri-Sat-Sun 06:00, 08:00 FLIGHT OF THE BUTTERFLIES 3D Fri-SatSun 02:00, 05:00

Hollywood Theatre

4122 NE Sandy Blvd., 503-281-4215 THE WOLF OF WALL STREET Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 07:30 NEBRASKA Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 06:45, 09:15 EVANGELION: 3.0 YOU CAN (NOT) REDO Fri 09:30 COOL AS ICE Sat 09:30 THE RED SHOES Sat 02:00 PORTLAND MOTORCYCLE FILM FESTIVAL SatSun 06:00 SATURDAY MORNING APOCALYPSE Mon 07:00 GETTING TO KNOW YOUTUBE Mon 07:30 SHAOLIN AND WU TANG Tue 07:30 COAL COCKED Wed 07:00

12000 SE 82nd Ave., 800-326-3264-996 GRAVITY 3D Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:30, 03:00, 05:25, 08:00, 10:25 THE WOLF OF WALL STREET Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:05, 04:10, 08:15 THE HUNGER GAMES: CATCHING FIRE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 12:00, 03:30, 07:00, 10:20 SAVING MR. BANKS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 01:15, 04:15, 07:20, 10:15 THE SECRET LIFE OF WALTER MITTY FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:10, 02:00, 05:00, 07:45, 10:35 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 11:15, 06:30 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG 3D Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 02:55, 10:05 TYLER PERRY’S A MADEA CHRISTMAS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 09:45 FROZEN Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:00, 01:40, 04:25, 07:10, 09:50 FROZEN 3D FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:40, 02:25, 05:05 INSIDE LLEWYN DAVIS Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:25, 02:10, 04:55, 07:30, 10:10 AMERICAN HUSTLE FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:45, 03:55, 07:05, 10:20 GRUDGE MATCH Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:45, 10:30 ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:05, 01:55, 04:50, 07:50, 10:40 PHILOMENA Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:30, 04:40 WALKING WITH DINOSAURS Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:55, 04:35, 09:35 WALKING WITH DINOSAURS 3D Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 02:15, 07:05 PARANORMAL ACTIVITY: THE MARKED ONES Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 11:50, 01:05, 02:15, 03:25, 04:30, 05:45, 06:45, 08:05, 09:10, 10:30 HER Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 01:00, 04:00, 07:00, 10:00 LONE SURVIVOR Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:15, 03:15, 06:15, 09:15 47 RONIN Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:05 47 RONIN 3D Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 01:55, 04:45, 07:35, 10:35 THE LEGEND OF HERCULES Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:45, 09:55 THE LEGEND OF HERCULES 3D FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 02:20, 04:50, 07:20 THE PRINCESS BRIDE Sun-Wed 02:00, 07:00 JACK RYAN: SHADOW RECRUIT RIDE ALONG

Regal Fox Tower Stadium 10

846 SW Park Ave., 800-326-3264 THE PRINCESS BRIDE SunWed 02:00, 07:00

Regal Pioneer Place Stadium 6

340 SW Morrison St., 800-326-3264 THE LEGEND OF HERCULES Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 04:30, 10:00 THE LEGEND OF HERCULES 3D Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 01:45, 07:15

SUBJECT TO CHANGE. CALL THEATERS OR VISIT WWEEK.COM/MOVIETIMES FOR THE MOST UP-TODATE INFORMATION FRIDAY-THURSDAY, JAN. 10-16, UNLESS OTHERWISE INDICATED

Willamette Week JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

CLASSIFIEDS DIRECTORY

JANUARY 8, 2014

44 WELLNESS

44 BULLETIN BOARD

44 SERVICES

44 MOTOR

44 STUFF

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

46 MATCHMAKER

46 JONESIN’

I MADE THIS

PETS

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MATT PLAMBECK

JOBS

503-445-2757 • mplambeck@wweek.com

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COUNSELING

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mention you saw this ad in WW and receive 10% off for your 1st visit!

STUFF

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FURNITURE

BEDTIME

TWINS

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MANSCAPING

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Counseling Individuals, Couples and Groups

HYPNOSIS

PETS pg. 45

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MUSICIANS’ MARKET

Week Classifieds JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

Hypnosis can help you with the following and more: • Fertility • Phobias • Smoking Cessation • Anxiety Skype Sessions • Weight Loss • Motivation are Available Laney Coulter CHt, NLP, M.Ed 503-289-3614 • www.lovingkindnesshypnosis.com

EEK

T DO OM C

TO PLACE AN AD CONTACT:

MATT PLAMBECK

Week of January 9

ARIES (March 21-April 19): You can blame it on the coming full moon. You can blame it on the gorgeous storm or the epic dream or the haunting song or the suffering you’re struggling to vanquish. All I ask is that you don’t blame it on the alcohol. OK? If you’re going to do wild and brave and unexpected things, make sure they are rooted in your vigorous response to primal rhythms, not in a drunken surrender to weakness or ignorance. I’m all for you losing your oppressive selfcontrol, but not the healthy kind of self-control. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): When is the last time you did an experiment? I’m not talking about scientific tests and trials that take place in a laboratory. I’m referring to real-life experiments, like when you try out an unfamiliar experience to see if it appeals to you . . . or when you instigate a change in your routine to attract unpredictable blessings into your sphere. Now would be an excellent time to expose yourself to a few what-ifs like that. You’re overdue to have your eyes opened, your limits stretched, and your mind blown. GEMINI (May 21-June 20): To help take the edge off the darkness you have been wrestling with, I offer you these lines from a poem by Kay Ryan: “The day misspent, / the love misplaced, / has inside it / the seed of redemption. / Nothing is exempt / from resurrection.” In other words, Gemini, whatever has disappeared from your life will probably return later in a new form. The wrong turns you made may lead you to a fresh possibility. Is that what you want? Or would you prefer that the lost things stay lost, the dead things stay dead? Make a decision soon. CANCER (June 21-July 22): “Human beings are often unable to receive because we do not know what to ask for,” says the writer Malidoma Somé in his book Water and Spirit. “We are sometimes unable to get what we need because we do not know what we want.” With that in mind, Cancerian, hear my two pleas: first, that in the next six weeks, you will work diligently to identify the goodies you want most; and second, that you will cultivate your capacity to receive the goodies you want most by refining your skill at asking for them. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Julia Morgan (1872-1957) was the first woman licensed as an architect in California. She designed over 700 buildings in the course of her brilliant career, and thrived both financially and artistically. One key to her success was her humility. “Don’t ever turn down a job because it’s beneath you,” she advised. That’s a helpful message for you to hear, Leo. It applies to the work-related opportunities you may be invited to take on, as well as the tasks that your friends, associates, and loved ones ask you to consider. You can’t possibly know ahead of time how important it might ultimately be to apply yourself conscientiously to a seemingly small assignment. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): One of Beethoven’s music teachers said, “As a composer, he is hopeless.” When Thomas Edison was a kid, a teacher told him he was “too stupid to learn anything.” Walt Disney worked at a newspaper when he was young, but his editor fired him because “he lacked imagination and had no good ideas.” I’m sure there was a person like that in your past -- someone who disparaged and discouraged you. But I’m happy to report that 2014 will be the best year ever for neutralizing and overcoming that naysayer’s curse. If you have not yet launched your holy crusade, begin now. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): As a child, French philosopher and writer Blaise Pascal (1623-1662) loved math. But his father, who homeschooled him, forced him to forego math and concentrate on studying the humanities. Blaise rebelled. When he was 12 years old, he locked himself in his room for days and immersed himself in mathematical investigations. When he emerged, he had figured out on his own some of Euclid’s fundamental theorems about geometry. Eventually, he became a noted mathematician. I see the coming weeks as prime time to do something like the young Pascal did: Seal yourself away from other people’s opinions about who you’re supposed to be, and explore the themes that will be crucial for the person you are becoming.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): In 1609, Dutch sea explorer Henry Hudson sailed to America and came upon what we now call Coney Island. Back then it was a barren spit of sand whose main inhabitants were rabbits. But it was eventually turned into a dazzling resort -- an “extravagant playground,” according to the documentary film Coney Island. By the early 20th century, there were three sprawling amusement parks packed into its two square miles of land, plus “a forest of glittering electric towers, historical displays, freak shows, a simulated trip to the moon, the largest herd of elephants in the world, and panoramas showing the Creation, the End of the World, and Hell.” I mention this, Scorpio, because 2014 could feature your very own Henry Hudson moment: a time when you will discover virgin territory that will ultimately become an extravagant playground. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “If men had wings and bore black feathers, few of them would be clever enough to be crows,” said 19th-century social reformer Henry Ward Beecher. That might be an accurate assessment for most people, but I don’t think it will be true for you Sagittarians in the foreseeable future. Your animal intelligence will be working even better than usual. Your instinctual inclinations are likely to serve as reliable guides to wise action. Trust what your body tells you! You will definitely be clever enough to be a crow.

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NIKKI

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CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Can you guess what combination of colors makes the most vivid visual impact? Psychologists say it’s black on yellow. Together they arrest the eye. They command attention. They activate a readiness to respond. According to my reading of the astrological omens, this is the effect you can and should have in the coming weeks. It’s time for you to draw the best kind of attention to yourself. You have a right and a duty to galvanize people with the power of your presence. Whether you actually wear yellow clothes with black highlights is optional as long as you cultivate a similar potency. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): I’m guessing that in a metaphorical sense, you’ve been swallowed by a whale. Now you’re biding your time in the beast’s belly. Here’s my prediction: You will be like the Biblical Jonah, who underwent a more literal version of your experience. The whale eventually expelled him, allowing him to return to his life safe and sound -- and your story will have the same outcome. What should you do in the meantime? Here’s the advice that Dan Albergotti gives in his poem “Things to Do in the Belly of the Whale.” “Count the ribs,” he says. “Look up for blue sky through the spout. Make small fires with the broken hulls of fishing boats. Practice smoke signals. Call old friends. Organize your calendar. Dream of the beach. Review each of your life’s ten million choices. Find the evidence of those before you. Listen for the sound of your heart. Be thankful that you are here, swallowed with all hope, where you can rest and wait.” PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): How do you like your tests? Short, intense, and dramatic? Or leisurely, drawn-out, and low-pressure? Here’s another question: Do you prefer to pick out the tests you take, making sure they’re good fits for the precise lessons you want to master? Or do you find it more exciting and adventurous to let fate determine what unpredictable tests get sent your way? Ruminate about these matters, Pisces. You’re due for a nice big test sometime soon, and it’s in your interest to help shape and define how everything unfolds.

LE-ROY

EBONY

SP O N SO R E D BY

S P O NSO R ED BY

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GUSTER

BEAR-BEAR

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Homework Imagine that one of your heroes comes to you and says, “Teach me the most important things you know.” What do you say? FreeWillAstrology.com.

check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes & Daily Text Message Horoscopes

freewillastrology.com

The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at

1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700

If you or your business would like to sponsor a pet in one of our upcoming Pet Showcases,

contact:

MATT PLAMBECK

503-445-2757 Willamette Week Classifieds JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

TO PLACE AN AD CONTACT:

MATT PLAMBECK

503-445-2757 • mplambeck@wweek.com

JONESIN’

by Matt Jones

Words That Never Were—a mashup from 2013 lists. Buzzfeed posts? 54 Sugar frontman Bob 57 Conical-bore instrument 58 Part of USNA 59 Birchbark vessel 60 Grumpy Cat, e.g. 61 Grooving on 62 Sports forum 63 “South Park” kid 64 British king of literature

Portland’s Indie Rock Strip Club

HOTTEST GIRLS IN CHINATOWN MORE ADS ONLINE @ WWEEK.COM

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Across 1 Agile 5 Give the appearance of 9 Potato chip flavor 14 Herbal medicine succulent 15 Meat approver, for short 16 “A Delicate Balance” playwright 17 “Damn Yankees” temptress 18 DC team 19 Epic about the Trojan War 20 They stand up for

a cause by bumping and grinding? 23 Industry, casually 24 Rare batteries 28 The act of working out a national budget with new fried desserts? 33 Babbling waterway 34 Clashing 35 Come ___ standstill 36 Place to play hockey 37 Hatch at the Capitol

38 Web address letters 39 Thurman who played June in “Henry & June” 40 Oven setting 41 Where much of “Torchwood” takes place 42 Came up with a rational reason for taking one’s own picture? 45 Tried, with “at” 46 World of Warcraft, for one 47 Giant swirl of

Down 1 Everything bagel topping 2 Blizzard battler 3 Casting director’s offer 4 It gets signed at school 5 General who wrote of military arts 6 “Caprica” actor Morales 7 1999 reality-show satire 8 “Heroes” star Oka 9 Not a good thing to hotwire 10 Prepared 11 MLB stat 12 One of Estelle’s co-stars 13 Letters in math proofs 21 Garden hose crimp 22 ___ Wrap 25 Minute 26 Smashed and grabbed 27 Loses it 28 Combat site of the 1850s

29 Mr. McDonald 30 Hawaiian staples 31 Word before mine or mall 32 Suit fabric 33 Art store purchase 37 Cookies since 1912 38 Digital annoyance? 40 Earth-shaking concept 41 Changing table cloth 43 Leno successor 44 Former “America’s Funniest People” host Sorkin 48 ___ of Maine (toothpaste brand) 49 “Yeah, as if!” 50 Time out? 51 Breakout phenomenon 52 Mined-over matter? 53 Scent 54 Late Beastie Boy 55 Dinghy thingy 56 “Ceci n’est pas ___ pipe” (Magritte caption)

last week’s answers

©2014 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com) For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle #JONZ657.

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Week Classifieds JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

TO PLACE AN AD CONTACT:

JOBS GENERAL

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EMPLOYMENT OPPORTUNITIES Stars Cabaret in BEAVERTONHiring (Beaverton-Hillsboro-SW Portland)

Stars Cabaret in BEAVERTON is now accepting applications for Servers, Bartenders, Hostess, Security (DPSST preferred). Part and Full-time positions available. Experience preferred but not required. Earn top pay + tips in a fast-paced and positive environment. Stars Cabaret is also conducting ENTERTAINERS auditions and schedule additions Mon-Sun 11am-10pm.

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ENTERTAINERS: Training provided to those new to the business. Located @ 4570 Southwest Lombard Avenuein Beaverton Please apply at location.

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BACK COVER CONTINUED...

MUSICIANS MARKET FOR FREE ADS in 'Musicians Wanted,' 'Musicians Available' & 'Instruments for Sale' go to portland.backpage.com and submit ads online. Ads taken over the phone in these categories cost $5.

TO PLACE AN AD ON BACK COVER CONTINUED call 503-445-2757

INSTRUMENTS FOR SALE TRADEUPMUSIC.COM

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Stars Cabaret in TUALATIN is now accepting applications for Servers, Bartenders, Hostess, Security (DPSST preferred). Part and Full-time positions available. Experience preferred but not required. Earn top pay + tips in a fast-paced and positive environment.

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Stars Cabaret is also conducting ENTERTAINERS auditions and schedule additions Mon-Sun 11am-10pm.

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ENTERTAINERS: Training provided to those new to the business.

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ww presents

I M A D E T HIS

“Leopard” by Jan Ellsworth 12” long x 7” wide x 6” tall Acrylic on a river rock

$100 for sale at: alphawolf597034@yahoo.com space sponsored by

Submit your art to be featured in Willamette Week’s I Made This. For submission guidelines go to wweek.com/imadethis

Willamette Week Classifieds JANUARY 8, 2014 wweek.com

TO ADVERTISE ON WILLAMETTE WEEK’S BACK COVER CALL 445-2757

BANKRUPTCY

Do you want to be debt free? Call Now: 503-808-9032 FREE Consultation. Payment Plans. Scott Hutchinson, Attorney www.Hutchinson-Law.com

ACTIVIST JOBS

AA HYDROPONICS

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Comedy Classes

Improv, Standup, Sketch writing. Now enrolling The Brody Theater, 503-224-0688 www.brodytheater.com

Muay Thai

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Work with Grassroots Campaigns, Inc. on behalf The Nature Conservancy - protect the earth’s most important natural places - fight for clean air, clean water, and open spaces Full-time / Part-time / Mgmt Avialable Pay $1,500 - $2,400 per Month • Call Tracey at 503-232-5326

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TO PROTECT NATURAL PLACES!

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Qigong Classes

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SUBOXONE Program, Off Max near Clackamas Town Center 503-902-1105 Dr. Ray Tangredi Psychiatry/Addiction

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