NEWS NO PRISON FOR SOME PARENTS. SHOP HITTING EVERY LOCAL RECORD STORE. BEER ONLY-IN-PORTLAND EXPERIENCES. P. 7
P. 38
P. 45
“I JUST GOT SQUIBBED.” P. 35 WWEEK.COM
VOL 41/24 04.15.2015
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E U S S I 0 42 BLEM O R P E R S, TH TEMPT TO U O T Y EEDER NE MAN’S AT . PAGE 14 W , S N I STR A IRL S AND O OSE ON THC K C A B THROW WITH DAB G OVERD
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KENNETH HUEY
FINDINGS
PAGE 47
WHAT WE LEARNED FROM READING THIS WEEK’S PAPER VOL. 41, ISSUE 24.
It would cost $16 million to build a new women’s prison. 7 The popular marijuana strain Jack Herer was named after a Southeast Portland shopkeeper. 18 Dab Girls are also sometimes known as “errl girls.” 27
If you’re looking for Chingy’s 2004 classic, Powerballin’, on vinyl, there is a place. 38
ON THE COVER:
Should you be granted entry, you can get Cascade beer on draft at the Multnomah Athletic Club. 43 As a teenager, writer Casey Jarman had blue hair, wore JNCO jeans and loved Hacky Sack. 57 Omakase cheese plates are a
thing now. 60 Robots will eventually be hot , and attraction is inevitable. 69
OUR MOST TRAFFICKED STORY ONLINE THIS WEEK:
@shesmokesjoints photographed by Matt Wong.
Cylvia Hayes’ public spokeswoman was paid for by a private business group.
STAFF Editor-in-Chief Mark Zusman EDITORIAL Managing Editor for News Brent Walth Arts & Culture Editor Martin Cizmar Staff Writers Nigel Jaquiss, Aaron Mesh, Beth Slovic Copy Chief Rob Fernas Copy Editors Matt Buckingham, James Yu Stage & Screen Editor Enid Spitz Web & Projects Editor Matthew Korfhage Music Editor Matthew Singer Books Penelope Bass Dance Kaitie Todd
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Steve Buel is exactly what Portland Public Schools needs [“Bad Boy,” WW, April 8, 2015]. He’s not afraid to say what needs to be said, to do something that will grab your attention to make his point, to go against the crowd, and he cares less about politics than he does about integrity. He is extremely thoughtful, and while on the outside he may be aggressive, he is all nuance on the inside. Buel is the only candidate of the people on the current board. Bring on Andrew Davidson and Paul Anthony if you want more. —“Dana Brenner-Kelley” Steve Buel is good for the students of PPS—he challenges what isn’t right and tries to offer a reasonable alternative that is truly associated with how and what students learn. Cronyism and nepotism are rampant in PPS, and Superintendent Carole Smith needs to go, along with the majority of the School Board. —“JO1965” You can disagree without being disagreeable. Buel sounds more like a power-hungry jerk than an activist. Did he really call his fellow board member an “asshole”? Not exactly the best way to sway opinion and build consensus. “Portland nice” can be insufferable, and the School Board needs to be a watchdog, not a lapdog. But I fail to see how consistently disrespecting your colleagues accomplishes anything constructive. —“Davey Blunkett”
A little “Managed Service Point” sign was affixed to our mailbox last week. What the heck is that? I asked our postman and he said it’s to “improve efficiency.” How does that work? —Puzzled
Come, come, Puzzled; it’s the 21st century—you can’t expect to go through life without getting a few stickers, QR codes or cortical implants on or about your person. Why, just the other day a lady from the health department put a “Level 3 Biohazard” sign on my laundry hamper and surrounded my bed with crime-scene tape, but you don’t see me crying the blues about it. That said, it’s no wonder your mailman was a bit terse when you asked about it—those stickers are part of a scheme to curtail whatever limited on-the-job freedom he might once have had. It is exceedingly rare that a postal worker decides to, say, stash the mail in an ever-expanding pile in his garage while spending his work days playing Mario Kart. Still, it has happened, and the “Managed Service Point” (MSP) stickers 4
Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
HAYES, KITZHABER AND THE LAW
What bothers me is that Liani Reeves was general counsel, the lawyer in the governor’s office responsible for ethics, integrity and compliance with the law [“Risky Business,” WW, April 8, 2015]. If anyone was in a position and had the authority to say “stop,” it was her. Instead, Reeves “revised slightly” the contract to make it look legit when it wasn’t. She took the reworded contract to the media, and explained how legit it was when she had every reason to believe it was business as usual for Cylvia Hayes. Reeves’ work concealed what was going on instead of disclosing it. —“Pdx Lawyer” Cylvia Hayes was trying her best to build her own little empire, and John Kitzhaber went right along with it, even actively encouraged it, all to the detriment and at the expense of Oregon’s citizens. She is a self-serving fraud and scammer—period. Kitzhaber has never been an effective or competent leader. He’s a politician, which is very rarely a compliment these days, and he and his girlfriend have brought nothing but shame on our state. WW, thank you for keeping us informed about these developing events. Keep up the good work. —“J E Nielsen” LETTERS TO THE EDITOR must include the author’s street address and phone number for verification. Letters must be 250 or fewer words. Submit to: 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Fax: (503) 243-1115, Email: mzusman@wweek.com.
help prevent it from happening again. Each sticker has a bar code, which your mailman is required to scan when he visits your house. The bar code information is then relayed to your carrier’s bureaucratic overlords, allowing them to keep tabs on whether (and how quickly) your mailman is completing his appointed rounds. To be clear, 99.999 percent of postal workers would never dream of throwing your mail in a dumpster (actually, I’m sure they dream about it, but they wouldn’t actually do it). A larger proportion, however, would like to walk their route as they see fit, rather than in whatever stupid configuration their pointy-headed boss thinks is most efficient. The MSP system puts the kibosh on this sort of personal initiative, however, crushing your mailman’s soul with a brutal efficiency you probably thought could only be achieved by private enterprise. USA! USA! QUESTIONS? Send them to dr.know@wweek.com
Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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PUBLIC SAFETY: Giving criminal moms a no-prison option. CITY HALL: Don’t Shoot Portland has its hands up in frustration. HOTSEAT: Ex- NFL linebacker Chris Borland, filmmaker Todd Trigsted. COVER STORY: How to spend the best 4/20 ever.
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Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
It’s unusual to hear about an unpaid $1.5 million tax bill with any organization— let alone Oregon’s medical school and research hospital. But on March 2, the Internal Revenue Service filed a lien for that amount against Oregon Health & Science University. The lien indicates OHSU owes for taxes it should have withheld from employee paychecks in 2014. OHSU officials blame a paperwork error that made it appear tax payments were late. “The deposits were all made on time,” OHSU vice president and comptroller Ken Brown said in a statement to WW. “We have no reason to believe this penalty will not be abated shortly.” The city is finally cracking down on companies like Airbnb that allow hosts to rent their homes to visitors. But it’s not actually going after Airbnb. Instead, the Portland Revenue Bureau has fined Vacation Home Rentals of Boston $3,000 for failing to register to pay transient lodging taxes and get its hosts to obtain city permits and undergo inspections. The company is run by TripAdvisor, which declined to comment. Meanwhile, what appear to be large-scale violations by Airbnb continue to stare the city in the face: 94 percent of its hosts haven’t bothered to get permits (“Air Invasion,” WW, March 11, 2015). City officials would not say when—or if—they will take action against the home-sharing giant. “At any point a company fails to meaningfully engage with us to increase enforcement,” Revenue Bureau director Thomas Lannom says in an email to WW, “we may assess penalties and require host information.” Weed is becoming a cash crop in Oregon after voters legalized recreational pot last fall. Now we just need a bank to stash that money. Last month, WW wrote that Gresham-based MBank intended to become the first bank in the state to offer checking accounts to marijuana businesses (“Joint Ventures,” WW, March 25, 2015). But as first reported April 10 by Marijuana Business Daily, MBank has decided to close the 75 accounts it opened for pot growers and sellers. MBank president Jef Baker says it couldn’t meet the demands of federal regulators. “As a small, community bank, we do not have the resources to manage the compliance needed for this industry,” Baker tells WW. “We thought we could, but we can’t.”
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The state of Oregon is dragging out its response to one of the state’s highest-profile murder cases. Last October, the Federal Public Defender’s Office filed a 189-page brief arguing that Frank Gable, convicted of the 1989 murder of Oregon Department of Corrections director Michael Francke, was innocent. The brief included recantations from five key state witnesses whose testimony helped convict Gable in 1991. The Oregon Department of francke Justice’s response to that brief was due April 13, after winning a 90-day extension. Now, the state is asking for even more time—a new, 180-day extension for its response. Gable’s counsel, Assistant Federal Public Defender Nell Brown, is opposing that request. “In this case,” Brown wrote in an April 10 filing, “justice delayed is justice denied.” There’s plenty more news at wweek.com.
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HOUSEBOUND WASHINGTON STATE OFFERS AN ALTERNATIVE TO SENDING PARENTS TO PRISON. IS OREGON WILLING TO TRY IT? By Be t h s lov i c
bslovic@wweek.com
Michelle Newell busted up her family in 2010 with a repeat conviction for writing bad checks to cover a drug habit. The state sent her to Coffee Creek Correctional Facility in Wilsonville, Oregon’s prison for women. Her children were taken away from her Southeast Portland home. One went into foster care. Two others were sent to Prineville and Roseburg to live with their fathers, men who had drug habits of their own. “One day I was their only parent,” Newell, 39, says today. “And the next day I was not there at all.” She got out of prison in 2012, and it took nearly two years of custody fights and emotional trauma before she could put her family back together. It’s a pattern repeated in the lives of scores of women sent to Coffee Creek every year— and something lawmakers hope to curb. A bill in Salem modeled after a 5-yearold program in Washington would give
nonviolent offenders like Newell a chance to stay with their kids while getting their acts together. House Bill 3503, introduced by Rep. Jennifer Williamson (D -Portland) and Rep. Andy Olson (R-Albany), would testdrive alternative sentences for moms and dads who have custody of their minor children when they commit crimes. Instead of going to prison, parents could stay home with their kids under what’s known as community supervision— intensive monitoring coupled with supports such as drug treatment, vocational training and parenting classes. Offenders who slip up in a big way would be sent to prison to serve a full sentence. “This is about keeping families together and doing what’s best for kids,” Williamson says. But it’s also about slowing the growth of the state’s population of female inmates. Coffee Creek was designed to hold 1,253 women, but it currently has 1,275, according to the Oregon Department of Corrections. State officials say increases in female inmates could force the state to open a new women’s prison at a cost of $16 million, plus $13 million a biennium to operate. Doug Harcleroad, executive director
of the Oregon District Attorneys Association, thinks his DAs will be either neutral or support the bill. The DAs had opposed an earlier provision that would have given inmates with children early release. Clatsop County DA Josh Marquis questions if the program goes too far in keeping some criminals out of prison. “We are not one of those states that are systemically placing low-risk offenders who committed low-level offenses in prison,” he says. The Corrections Department recently ended an effective but expensive program that helped a small number of Coffee Creek inmates stay connected to their kids while in prison. The program brought inmates and their children together and offered the women classes on parenting and other skills they could use once they got out of prison (“Hard Time Gets Harder,” WW, Dec. 10, 2014). Williamson fought the cutting of that program. The bill she introduced with Olson is intended to save money while accomplishing the same goals. Newell, for example, rarely heard from or saw her children while she was in prison. Her two boys’ fathers never brought them to visit. Newell occasionally got to talk to one of the boys when he visited Newell’s mother in Portland and she arranged phone calls. But her mother died part way through Newell’s sentence, and the phone calls stopped. The Department of Human Services helped Newell’s daughter in foster care make three visits in the course of nearly two years.
“It was tough,” Newell says. “We’re still in family therapy.” That trauma is what Washington officials are trying to avoid with their alternative sentencing program for parents, which it launched in 2010. Parents with custody of minor children may be considered for 12 months of “community custody” instead of prison, if they’re not guilty of sex crimes or other violent offenses, and if they don’t face deportation. A judge approves the alternative sentencing. “You have to be able to show there’s motivation to change behavior,” says Susan Leavell, who runs the Washington program. Leavell says 120 offenders—mostly women—have completed community custody while 50 have gone back to prison. Among those who finished the program, recidivism is about 6 percent, compared with 29 percent statewide. It also saves money. Leavell says it costs about $90 a day to house a mom or dad in prison versus $32 to supervise him or her in the community. Nova Sweet, 42, got out of Coffee Creek in February after serving part of a 56-month sentence on burglary and drug charges. She has two children and took part in the in-prison program for mothers that the Corrections Department recently shut down. Sweet says Williamson’s bill would help too few parents and do nothing for moms who are already incarcerated. “Williamson’s bill alone is noble,” Sweet says, “but I don’t think it’s enough.”
Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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CITY HALL RONITPHOTO.COM
NEWS
HANDS UP: Antonio Greely delivers a speech over a bullhorn during an April 14 protest in the Multnomah County building, while Don’t Shoot Portland organizer Teressa Raiford (left) looks on.
DÉJÀ BLUE PROTESTERS OF POLICE VIOLENCE MARCH AWAY FROM CITY HALL EMPTY-HANDED. BY AA R ON MESH
amesh@wweek.com
The protest group that shut down Portland during the holiday season to condemn police killings of unarmed black men is back on the streets. This time, Don’t Shoot Portland protested the deadly shooting by a white South Carolina police officer of Walter Scott, an unarmed black man killed while running from a traffic stop. About 30 protesters rallied April 14 at the east end of the Hawthorne Bridge, then marched inside Multnomah County headquarters. “Nobody should be shot down in the street like an animal,” said Antonio Greely, a 20-yearold Portland Community College student. “You treat dogs better than human beings.” The police officer in Scott’s death has been charged with murder. The deaths of two other black men last year, Michael Brown and Eric Garner, brought no charges against the police involved, sparking nationwide protests that brought as many as 3,000 onto Portland streets to block traffic and shut down stores (“Bring the Noise,” WW, Dec. 10, 2014). The group won a major promise from Mayor Charlie Hales: a pledge that Hales would meet with Don’t Shoot Portland regularly during the next six months to talk about reforms in the Portland Police Bureau. The promise has not been kept. Hales first met with protesters Dec. 9. Their demands were vague, but they asked for more federal oversight and more citizen control over the review of excessive-force cases. Hales gave a shout-out to Teressa Raiford, organizer of Don’t Shoot Portland, at his Jan. 30 state of the city speech in an effort to play up his close work with the African-American community. “I’ve held two meetings so far with Don’t Shoot Portland, and five more are planned,” he said. “Thank you, Teressa, for your leadership and your help.” Raiford says Hales has since proved he was never serious about reforms. 10
Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
“We tried to connect with our mayor and the police,” Raiford says. “And they lied to us.” Hales’ office says that’s not true. “It felt like there was a desire from Don’t Shoot Portland to find some reason to not do dialogues anymore,” says Deanna Wesson-Mitchell, Hales’ police liaison. “There’s some members of the community who have a storyline that they want to keep telling.” The truth is, Hales and Don’t Shoot Portland— both claiming they support serious cultural changes in the Police Bureau—walked away from each other over who controlled the meetings. The protesters wanted Hales to spend at least four hours with them during each monthly meeting. Hales wanted to spend no more than two. The sides haven’t spoken to each other since Feb. 28—when protesters interrupted Hales at a neighborhood forum with notices saying they intended to sue the city for excessive police force during a November march. The break has sent Hales and Don’t Shoot Portland in different directions, each claiming to pursue real change. Raiford and other protesters have shifted their focus to trying to pass a package of police reform bills in Salem, few of which have received hearings. “The people in Salem have a whole lot more respect than they do locally,” she says. “That’s not even a question.” Hales’ office, meanwhile, has continued to hold monthly meetings with other AfricanAmerican community leaders. The two meetings in March focused on improving police communication with black teenagers, and discussing the increase of foot patrols. “The mayor’s office is completely committed to police reform,” Wesson-Mitchell says, “and also to making sure the community is involved in it.” Raiford says the short amount of time Hales spends in the meetings is inadequate. “An hour and a half is not going to do it,” Raiford says. “So we haven’t met with him anymore. It’s dividing the movement, because some people are impressed that the mayor was involved.” Dan Handleman, who has pressed for reforms for more than 20 years with Portland Copwatch, says he understands why protesters would grow frustrated. He said the January meeting—one of only two Hales conducted—had city officials bragging about their progress. “From what I saw, the mayor and his staff basically talked about their successes,” Handleman says. “I don’t think it’s a huge loss when it’s largely a one-way discussion.”
Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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NEWS
SpoRTS
CHRIS BORLAND & TODD TRIGSTED THE FORMER NFL PLAYER AND A LOCAL FILMMAKER DISCUSS THE VIOLENCE IN AMERICA’S GAME.
ChriSTinE Dong
CourTESy of nfl
By ANNA WALTERS
awalters@wweek.com
Last month, Chris Borland shocked anyone who watches football by announcing he was walking away from a career in the National Football League—and millions of dollars—after only one year in the game. The reason: He wanted to protect his brain. Borland—24 and a rising star as BORlAND a linebacker for the San Francisco 49ers—said the sport’s dangers and its link to brain injuries weren’t worth the risks to his health, no matter how much money he might make. His announcement came as the league claims the game is safer than ever (with concussions down by 25 percent) and public debate grows about how young is too young for kids to start playing. Borland is coming to town April 19 for the premiere of Gridiron Gladiators, a documentary by Portland filmmaker Todd Trigsted (a running back for the Linfield College Wildcats in 1981) that investigates brain injuries to players from the pee wee leagues to the pros. Borland and other forTRIgSTED mer pro players will speak after the screening. Borland and Trigsted talked to WW about the NFL’s claims, the pressure to play despite head injuries, and the one question someone should ask Nike co-founder Phil Knight. WW: The NFL says it’s working to make the game safer. After quitting the game, how do you respond to that? Chris Borland: The action I took is statement enough. I’m just trying to take the high road and do what’s best for me. The NFL can make collisions safer once they eliminate inertia from the realm of physical possibility. It’s about your brain moving inside your skull. Until they can fix that, I don’t know what the story is.
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Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
Has this issue sucked the enjoyment out of watching football? Borland: Not entirely. It’s still a beautiful game. It’s like an art form the way guys are able to do things. But largely you know what guys are doing to themselves on the field, so it’s harder to get behind. How do you get committed football fans to care? Borland: It’s a question of morality. Guys in the [NFL] are not really seen as human beings. They’re just number soand-so for the red and gold team. If fans take a step back and better understand what they’re watching, they may be more sensitive to it. If films like this and statistics and research get out to the common fan, they might view the game differently. What is the most outrageous thing you experienced related to a head injury? Borland: It’s really easy to point the finger at coaches, but I think the onus falls on the individual. I’ve made decisions to play when I threw up on the sidelines or the stadium was spinning. When was this? Borland: In college. I got hit and went back in. No one was at fault. It was just what I decided to do. It was a regularseason game against our rival. That’s more commonplace than the average fan would know. Todd Trigsted: Ever think about what the game is doing to your body? Borland: It’s a team sport. If you endured the physical harm to your body in an individual sport, it would be a lot easier to say this doesn’t make sense. There is a component of taking one for the team. The team nature of the game highly disincentivizes you from making the best decision for your health. We’re so immersed in the culture of toughness. What other pressures are there to keep playing? Trigsted: I interviewed 24 former players for the film. [Former NFL Pro Bowl running back] Delvin Williams said he had to keep enduring the pain because, like many others, he knew football was the only way to get into college. Borland: Fame and money are important to a lot of guys. It’s a way to uplift your family. If some guys knew all the risks and details, they’d still decide to play. Football is an enormous business. If you could ask Nike chairman Phil Knight one question, what would it be? Trigsted: If a college kid gets injured, is Phil Knight and Nike going to help them out? There could be an endowment for players’ long-term health. A player should be able to be compensated in some way or supported where they get a physical every year. There’s a free physical, MRI scans or whatever it is to try to support future health. What would you tell the mom of a star running back in high school? Trigsted: I had a mother watch an earlier preview of my film. She got pissed. She said, “What am I supposed to
BONEYARD: This image used in Gridiron Gladiators is an 1897 editorial cartoon from the New York World.
think?” I said, “What do you think?” Both of her boys are playing [high school] football. She did not want to own up to any of that risk. I challenged her to think that the game was more dangerous than she wanted to accept or believe because it puts her in the position of being a bad mother if she’s putting her kids in harm’s way. Why did you make this film? Trigsted: I made my film to give parents a cultural perspective of how this game became so valuable that we are willing to risk the health of our kids. Knowing what we know now about the risks of the game, why do parents continue to helmet their kids? How did your personal history play a role? Trigsted: My father was a football coach—a smash-mouth coach from Chicago, three-yards-in-a-cloud-of-dust kind of coach. Always taught us to sacrifice our body. In college, I got hit so hard in practice, I thought I was going to die. The other tailbacks were laughing because I got hit so hard. I cowered. I didn’t know what to do. I quit football after that. I just knew I never wanted to get hit again. Later, I had an X-ray of my neck—and it is actually bowed the other way. From that hit. I lost friends. My football coach father had a hard time accepting this. I lost my culture. I was lost for a long time. I made this film to come to terms with it all. How did your father react when he saw your film? Trigsted: He cried. SEE IT: Gridiron Gladiators premieres at the Academy Theater, 7818 SE Stark St., on Sunday, April 19. 4 pm. $10.
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APRIL 20 NEEDS A MAKEOVER. BY WM . W IL L ARD G RE E N E
w illie@ wweek.com
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s far as dates on the Julian calendar go, this coming Monday doesn’t have a whole lot going for it. Consult Wikipedia: the birthday of Adolf Hitler, the anniversaries of the Ludlow Massacre and the failed invasion of Cuba at the Bay of Pigs. In 1999, April 20 became the day two maniacs with fi rearms tore through a Colorado high school. Just five years ago, celebratory plumes of lit cannabis were darkened by the explosion on the Deepwater Horizon, the biggest environmental disaster in American history. So, yeah, April 20 needs rehab, and weed is the one thing the date has going for it. What would a national cannabis holiday look like? Funny you should ask, because I’ve been thinking about that a lot as we enter the first year when Portland’s weed is, if not technically legal, not really illegal, either. No one’s likely to stop you from smoking weed in a Portland city park this 4/20—and maybe you should take advantage, since even smoking cigarettes or cigars in a park will be illegal as of July 1. If you’re looking for a formal gathering this 4/20, see the events listings below. If you really want a fresh and classy experience, there are now weedery tours and OMMP spas (page 22). If you don’t have a medical card, you can already buy legal weed just across the river, at one of the dispensaries reviewed on page 30. If you need some help picking the right product, check out the selection of throwback strains on page 18. Be careful not to overdo it, lest you end up like the poor bastard we asked to take 100 milligrams of THC for the story on page 35. Also, if you need a reminder that just because it’s legal doesn’t mean we’re done using marijuana as an agent of positive change, check out an opinion piece about Dab Girls on page 27. And if you’ve already got a good stash and a few friends to smoke with? Well, here are my ideas for what makes a great 4/20 party.
Gather to partake
Despite a bevy of urban legends swirling around the date’s origins, as far as I’m concerned the 4:20/cannabis association began with a small band of Marin County high schoolers who coordinated their afterschool smoke breaks for that time. Anyone who’s anyone will tell you the best part of toking is toking with others, which these kids knew a long time ago. This 4/20, get together and pass the pipe.
Go to green
You want your grass on the grass, dude. Forest Park or Mount Tabor or the Columbia River Gorge or Hoyt Arboretum. Breathe deep and put one foot in front of the other. If there’s water by where it’s green, that’s better! Remember: Next April, park rangers can hassle you if they spot hazy clouds drifting upward off your park bench.
Eat some tacos
There’s really only one food that’s appropriate for handling your munchies on 4/20, and that’s tacos. I’m talking about tacos in any form: Taco Bell, Original Taco House, Taco Time (not recommended), Por Que No or the homemade ditties with Bearitos seasoning packs and loosely chopped iceberg. I’m also talking breakfast tacos. Tacos all day, friends!
Adopt the appropriate dress and custom
The world doesn’t need another dress-up holiday, but I really like the idea of decking oneself discretely in seven-pointed leaves as a subtle reminder of the plant’s long, dark days underground.
Make like Johnny Appleseed
It’s spring, and therefore an ideal time for preparing a space for new plant life. Doesn’t have to be a cannabis plant! Just a little somethin’ to usher back the green, you know? (But you should consider that you can order pot seeds online for discreet delivery and that possessing four of those plants will be legal in July, just about the time they get tall enough for anyone to notice.)
Listen to the music
Maybe it’s Tom Petty’s “You Don’t Know How It Feels” or Danny Brown’s “Kush Coma” or one of Phish’s especially lengthy jams. Whatever you’re smoking, get music on.
Solemn remembrance at 4:20 on 4/20
Oregon was sheltered from the brunt of the conflict, but the war on cannabis that raged for the last 100 years had a real toll. Families were shattered. Countless men and women have been imprisoned or killed in the U.S., Mexico and around the world in a misguided attempt to eliminate a mildly psychoactive herb that was grown in the gardens of our Founding Fathers. The toll was real and sad, and the war still wages. Before you pass that herb, take a moment to remember those who couldn’t be with us on this very special day.
APRIL 20 Events Free Hot Box BBQ at Bridge City
Milton Friedman was bullshitting you: There is a lunch that’s so low in opportunity cost that it’s functionally free, and you will find it here on Monday, April 20, beginning at 11 am. Show up with the Leafly app on your intelligent telephone and the Hot Box BBQ cart will hook you up with a free sammy made of delicious smoked meats on brioche buns, plus chips and water. Bridge City Collective Southeast, 215 SE Grand Ave., bridgecitycollective.com. 11 am. Free.
4:20 at Mount Tabor
It’s kind of an unofficial thing, but it’s well-known enough that even The Oregonian has covered it, so stay off our collective ass about drawing attention to it. On 4/20, at 4:20 pm, a bunch of people from a variety of backgrounds who share one common interest tend to congregate on the grassy lawn atop Mount Tabor. And they tend to yell in unison. If you listen for a steady drumbeat, you will find this group, and if you stand near them, you will get a little smoky and may also be offered a drag. Southeast 60th Avenue and Salmon Street. 4:20 pm. Free.
Cannabis Corner Grand Opening Ceremony
The world’s first city-owned weed shop holds a grand-opening party weekend. On Saturday April 18, growers and vendors set up tables to demonstrate their wares, and on Monday, April 20, the city of North Bonneville hosts an open-house celebration with the shop’s staff, the Skamania County Chamber of Commerce, and people from the local cannabis community. The open house has free refreshments, raffles and a ribbon-cutting (giant scissors promised) from 5 to 7 pm. For more info, check facebook.com/ nbpdacorner, @CannabisCorner1 on Twitter, and thecannabiscorner.org.
Ribbon-Cutting at High End Market Place
High End Market Place has been open for a few months now, but, uh, you know how it goes, right? By the time you get the sink to stop leaking and figure out the quirks in your POS system, there’s a line out the door and you have more bills that need paying than ribbons that need cutting. Well, now this little shop in an old Vancouver Craftsman gets a proper christening with the chamber of commerce and Vancouver’s square-
jawed, TV-ready mayor, Tim Leavitt. The Voodoo Doughnuts truck is coming to pass out free doughnuts, there’s live music on deck and special deals on Thai sticks, which should get you blazed enough to try breaking into the WSUVancouver ROTC to burn draft cards—or something. High End Market Place, 1906 Broadway St., Vancouver, Wash., 360-609-0364, highendmarketplace.com. Ribboncutting at noon, doughnuts 1-3 pm. Chronic grams for $4.20.
Don Carlos & Vieux Farka Touré with Manoj
They call this a “victory party on the road to cognitive liberty and the end of the drug war,” and while we can’t celebrate too hard with so many of our brothers and sisters still living under weed-free tyranny, this party has both legendary reggae singer Don Carlos, who is an original member of Black Uhru, and Malian guitar player Vieux Farka Touré. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St. 9 pm. $22. 21+.
Mobb Deep
No weed-happy party rap here. For 20 years, Mobb Deep has kept it gritty and street with dark stories from its native Queensbridge. Its
hardcore classic The Infamous, which turns 25 on April 25, thrives in the dark spots that Jay and the Wu crew only mention in passing— the sex is drunken and sloppy, the bail needs paid, friends are snitches, or friends are fucking wifeys, and they need to be shot. Mostly this happens on sparse, high-hat-heavy soundscapes. It’s a grim but realistic world, and if you’re not in the mood for positive vibes and scandalously dressed hunnies, this is your spot. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., dougfirlounge.com. 9 pm. $20-$23.
Cannabis Cabaret
Live fire-dancing comes back to Dante’s along with comedy, burlesque and aerial gymnastics at this annual celebration of weed culture. There are also glutenfree baked goods but they do not appear to be medicated, so think tinctures. Or just stand up close with an unlit jazz cigarette in your mouth and hope one of the dancers lights it. Dante’s, 350 W Burnside St., danteslive.com. $12 in advance, $15 at the door. 21+.
Southeast Grind Birthday
Southeast Grind is a 24-hour coffee shop—yeah, totally different grinder here—that opened six years ago
on April 20. To celebrate, they’re offering $1 cups of chai and latte all day. If you want some caffeine to level out your buzz, this is an ideal place to get it. Southeast Grind, 1223 SE Powell Blvd., 473-8703, southeastgrind.com.
Mellow Mood Raffle
Want to finally get that fritted disc bong? Every year, the two Portland locations of Mellow Mood head shop hold a giveaway, with customers entered to win a $1,000 shopping spree. Mellow Mood, 4119 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 2357473; 1501 SW Broadway, 227-5099; mellowmood.com.
Budtenders Ball
Party with food, drinks and music at the World Forestry Center. You don’t need an OMMP card to attend, but you do need one to get into the tent where people are consuming the good stuff. Vendors will have flower, BHO and glassware, and a local lab will conduct a demonstration. The first 300 people who show up after RSVPing will get swag bags. World Forestry Center, 4033 SW Canyon Road, tinyurl.com/budtendersball. 7 pm-midnight. Reservations required; OMMP card required to enter smokers tent. 21+.
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testing the throwback superstrains of the ’60s and ’70s. t’s an exciting time in weed. There are new strains on local shelves almost every week from growers who are creating endless blends from the strains in their collections. Although this rampant cross-breeding has given us some stellar blends, one can’t help but think fondly of the classic strains. The freshmen of Phi Kappa Leafly are hardly authorities on what the “real deal” should taste or feel like, and when it comes to actually getting your hands on these old-school strains, the most accurate sources will be smoking circles at the back of a Grateful Dead farewell concert. Most old-timey marijuana seed exchanges were kept within friends and family, so it’s nearly impossible to find good examples of legends like Panama Red and Maui Waui. Yet, look hard enough and there are glimmers of ’60s and ’70s super-strains still available in Portland. Here are the throwbacks I was able to track down.
Acapulco Gold courtsey of df industries
DF Industries
21.13% THC, 0.11% CBD (Green Leaf Lab) $10 a gram at Five Zero Trees, 10209 SE Division St., Suite 100.
Though this epic sativa comes from Acapulco and its thick coating of glittering orange hairs resemble gold, some say it got the name because from how much people were willing to pay for it. Described as the perfect cerebral high, with a calming physical buzz to boot, this strain was considered one of the finest ever grown. It’s difficult to find any Acapulco Gold these days, much less top-shelf versions, but this crop by DF Industries gave me an impression well worth the $10. My mind unwound within the first few minutes after a bong hit, and the taste was fresh and citrusy long after I finished exhaling. This batch is strong for the first hour, but the relaxing high eases up before you lose motivation.
northern Lights 5 courtesy of five Zero trees
Five Zero trees
17.5% THC, 0.2% CBD (Going Green Labs) $10 a gram at Five Zero Trees, 10209 SE Division St., Suite 100.
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Considered one of the most influential strains of all time, Northern Lights first hit the scene in the late 1970s and early ’80s, and many credit this strain to a grower called “The Indian,” who lived just north on Hayden Island. The “#5” refers to the phenotype of Northern Lights this was grown from, and supposedly #5 was the best of the bunch. Stimulating both mentally and physically, Five Zero Trees’ flower is a standout example of this strain’s notorious psychotropic effects. My body felt at ease, and I quickly zoned out, feeling comfortable and no longer remotely aware of my to-dos. I felt creative and curious; had I been out on a clear, starry night, I could have very well seen some Northern Lights of my own.
Jack Herer courtsey of small axe nW
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26% THC, 0.1% CBD (MrX Labs) $10 a gram at Kaleafa, 5232 SE Woodstock Blvd.
An intense indica with federal-level folklore, G13 is the strain supposedly bred by botanists hired by the U.S. government. According to legend, they gathered the strongest strains from breeders all over the world in the 1960s, creating superhybrids in secret labs. An unnamed technician allegedly stole a single cutting from the plant labeled “G13” and grew it for the public. This batch at Kaleafa has an especially floral fragrance and a sweet, kushy flavor that envelops your taste buds with the first smoke. The indica high hit my body immediately, inspiring me to stretch as soon as I had the leg room to do so. It would be great for solo yoga or insomnia, but this strain is too heavy for the average weekday of most smokers.
Small Axe Farms
25.42% THC, 2.1% CBD (MrX Labs) $10 a gram at Pure Green, 3738 NE Sandy Blvd.
This strain is a hybrid bred from four different Cannabis Cup-winning strains in the early 1990s: Northern Lights #5, Skunk (#1, most likely) and Haze, which is a sativa blend. It was initially known as “4-way,” until Jack Herer, the renowned marijuana advocate and author of The Emperor Wears No Clothes, expressed his favoritism for the strain. It has gone by the name “Jack Herer” ever since. The frosty, citrusy scent and flavor make it hard to put down, and the creative, invigorating high is just as addictive. When the sun came out the morning I first tried these Small Axe nugs, I couldn’t get outdoors fast enough. Jack gets the gears in your brain moving, without running you off the tracks like some sativa-dominant blends can. Head to the Third Eye Shoppe at 3950 SE Hawthorne Blvd. for more Jack Herer lore—he opened the head shop back in 1987, and his son, Mark Herer, is the current owner.
Durban Poison c o u r t e s y o f tj ’ s o r g a n i c g a r d e n s
By M a ry ro M a n o
Kaleafa
tJ’s organic Gardens
26.87% THC, 0.11% CBD (3B analytical) $12 a gram at Canna-Daddy’s Wellness Center, 16955 SE Division St.
Hailing from the South African port city of Durban, the consensus is that the first of these pure sativa seeds were brought to the United States in the 1970s by famed horticulturist Ed Rosenthal. The sweet, piney smell and taste have maintained a loyal fan base, and although modern crops supposedly don’t have the same kick, it’s still a fantastic smoke. My particular batch had a fragrance so sweet, almost aniselike, that my taste buds watered. It’s a wholehearted, uplifting sativa, without much of any body sensation. Expect an energetic head rush that gets you on your feet, while staying smooth and steady. As one of the most notable “building-block strains,” a few of the famous children of Durban Poison are Girl Scout Cookies and Cherry Pie.
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Medical Marijuana Card Services Clinic We help qualified patients in Oregon and Washington get a medical marijuana card 4911 NE Sandy Blvd. • Portland, OR 503-384-WEED (9333) • mmcsclinic.com
oG Kush Campfire Farms
29.24% THC, 0.04% CBD (MRX Labs) $10 a gram at Pure Oregon, 11134 NE Halsey St.
Check out our Dispensary, Marijuana Store & More behind the MMCS clinic.
B-Real of Cypress Hill mentioned this strain in multiple songs, popularizing this mysterious Kush along the West Coast. The hip-hop introduction led to the assumption that its name referred to “Original Gangster,” but the growing community affirms that it stands for “Ocean Grown.” The controversy around this strain doesn’t end there, and the name doesn’t help. Although Kush signals an indica strain, it smokes like a sativa. The high is euphoric and happy, with a relaxing mental buzz that curbs anxiety. No one’s totally sure of its genetics at this point, but Leafly hypothesizes Chemdawg crossed with Hindu Kush. A few origin stories lead back to a seedy bag of unknown, extremely dank weed in Miami. Other connect this strain to the Grateful Dead tours of the early 1990s. Whatever the parentage may be, one won’t be able to forget the distinct, forest-pine scent of a solid batch of OG Kush.
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Sour Diesel Pacific Rim Organica 23.4% THC, 0.1% CBD
$12 a gram at Brooklyn Holding Company, 1436 SE Powell Blvd.
Named for its sickly-sweet, gasolinelike aroma, Sour Diesel is another strain with the haziest of origins. The name and scent seem to refer to Original Diesel’s genetics, though some say it is a cross of Skunk and Chemdawg 91. Others claim a lucky New Yorker found the odd seed in a random ounce of Mexican Sativa x Chemo. All stories are probably correct, because the types of Sour Diesel available today vary in fragrance, taste and effects; true Sour Diesel is most likely extinct. The crisp flavor leaves a tangy taste on your tongue, and the clear-headed high sharpens your focus to a pinpoint. Sour Diesel has a happy, refreshing buzz that alleviates any level of depression. If what we’re smoking now is a watered-down version, I can see why there was so much infighting over this strain. One master grower told me the beloved sativa was so sought after that the name began to refer to how “sour” people became when they ran out of it. Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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LUXURY TOKES
cAnnABUSInESSES Go BEYonD BUDS. by m a ry r o m a n o
the cannabis club Day Spa
Washington state’s highest-grossing recreational cannabis club, New Vansterdam, is trying to make weed into another high-end artisanal product. “We want to treat pot
like Portland treats IPAs,” says New Vansterdam’s ShonLueiss Harris. “We know people care deeply about what they smoke.” The shop has reached across the border to start a medicinal dispensary in Beaverton, in order to familiarize itself with Oregon patients before legalization grants access to the masses. It will go by New Vansterdam Med, and will be designed to feel more like a day spa than a clinic. Shon described the aesthetic as “organic and warm. Patients should feel as though they’ve walked into a cloud atop a forest.” A moss wall will cover one side of the shop, and reclaimed branches adorned with lights will dangle from the ceiling, creating an ethereal, comforting glow. Strains and farms will be listed in as much detail as the purveyors’
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s the legal gray area washes out, weed is going the way of craft beer and quinoa. Pearl District trophy wives and bushy-tailed college grads alike are revealing homemade topical ointments and recipes for marijuana-infused lemonade, while major companies such as Ben & Jerry’s ice cream and Skinnygirl beverages have announced intentions of future products made with marijuana. Here’s what the Lexus/Lululemon/Lacoste world of luxury weed may look like.
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Looking to get zoned in instead of out? this inquisitive and aware strain is great for writing, reading or creating, not so much for socializing or video watching. trips through tsa may trigger extremely short bouts of paranoia, but you’ll catch yourself in time. Get it from Collective Awakenings.
With a high that comes straight through the face, a touch of dry mouth, and a smooth smoke out of a pipe, ice Queen will slow you down but not completely space you out. colors will seem brighter, ideas will seem better, and you’ll think you’re hilarious on twitter. Get it from Collective Awakenings.
Lucid dreaming is easy with this aware but not energetic strain that will have you writing streamof-consciousness prose by the time the high hits at the nose bridge. smelling of starburst with a high that lifts the cheekbones, it will have you in a dreamy state perfect for creative endeavors or video games, but nothing active. Get it from PDX TreeHouse Collective.
Like a caffeinated limeade, this energy-boosting strain will have you smelling citrus all over and excitable like the best bubble party you ever pretended to attend. the high hits the top of the forehead, and will probably have you speaking in a bit of a drawl, but you’ll keep your focus. Get it from Nectar.
if we could package the “zone” and sell an impermanent, three-quarters potency version, this would be it. its high in the middle of the forehead and temples will have you lifted, creative and focused, like a poor man’s Will Hunting. Get it from Farmar. tYLeR HuRst.
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list at Ned Ludd. Meanwhile, budtenders, many of whom are growers themselves, will play the same role as knowledgeable wine stewards.
Weedery Tours
Wine and Weed
A surprising company to join the conversation around legal cannabis is Colangelo & Partners (colangelopr.com), a public relations firm representing wine and spirits across the globe. Its clients include Sapporo beer, Amaro Lucano liqueur, and all South African and Spanish wine. Though the company’s work is mainly with alcohol, it can’t ignore the increasing presence of marijuana in the mainstream culture of leading cities. “Major wine publications are talking about the future of pairing weed and wine,” says Colangelo & Partners account executive Paul Yanon, “but there are few pairings, if any, available online or at individual vineyards. The fact is, there are lots of people who enjoy the two together, and believe they can complement one another.” And so Yanon and co-worker Ferdinand Pougatch hit the books and assembled a world-class list of wine-and-weed pairings. They also hope to encourage people to experiment with flavors and invent their own pairings. Wine enthusiasts can rediscover their favored wines by trying them while smoking different marijuana strains, and whole new tastes or aromas may come to light. If anything, Pougatch and Yanon show how anticlimactic it is to integrate marijuana into a traditional business philosophy. Restructuring the face of your company to be open to marijuana legalization doesn’t mean there has to be a smoking table at reception. Like a skunky Kush and well-rounded red wine, highend businesses and marijuana can go hand in hand.
RECOMMENDED WINE AND WEED PAIRINGS Picks by Paul Yanon and Ferdinand Pougatch 2013 Mulderbosch cabernet sauvignon rosé paired with Jack Herer
Whoever says real men don’t drink pink while smoking doesn’t know what they’re talking about. South Africa’s Mulderbosch cabernet sauvignon rosé and sativa-dominant Jack Herer each have fruity and earthy aftertastes, which make them an attractive pairing. The wine has aromas of blood orange, cherry drops and black currant cordial, and finishes with a slightly rich yet refreshing finish. This is a perfect option for that lazy outdoor picnic smoke.
2012 Mulderbosch Faithful Hound red blend paired with Blackberry Kush
This Bordeaux-style wine overflows with classic claret aromas of ripe
cassis, fragrant purple plums and spicy notes of sandalwood, star anise and white pepper. Because cabernet blends are full-bodied, you can throw a heady, full-bodied strain at it. This is the job for a Kush. This purple indica matches perfectly with the intense weight and flavor of the delicious red wine.
Publishes April 29th, 2015
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Seattle’s Kush Tourism (kushtourism.com) has modeled its business on the profitable enterprise of wine tours, which breathed new life into Oregon tourism by ferrying Portland urbanites and well-heeled out-of-staters to vineyards for tastings and scenery. Kush already has three marijuana tours operating out of the Seattle area. Each serves a different avenue of cannabis curiosity: a basic tour of an indoor grow facility, a “Toke ’n’ Brush” medicated painting class, and the grand “Kush Tour,” which visits a recreational shop, a smoking lounge, a glass-blowing demonstration, and a trip through a testing and processing facility Kush’s website includes a database for marijuana-friendly lodging in Washington, Colorado and other states that are in the process of legalizing recreational use. They mention a few places in Oregon where one can stay overnight and smoke in or around the room, including a luxe bed and breakfast called Mt. Scott Manor that proclaims it is “proud to support cannabis users seeking a relaxing B&B experience,” while advertising deer in the nearby woods. Such progress in pot tourism bodes well for those of us crossing our fingers for Enchanted Forest to become the first (openly) pot-friendly amusement park.
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2012 Mulderbosch sauvignon blanc paired with Amnesia Haze
This South African wine finds the perfect balance between the powerful herbaceous notes in New Zealand sauvignon blancs, and the tropical, fruit-forward flavors in California varieties. Amnesia Haze, a hybrid, is the perfect match. This top-selling weed is citrusy and earthy, but not too overwhelming. It will help highlight the wine’s richness and acidity.
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down with dab girls
420
a feminist critique of sexy stoner chicks. By M A Ry R O M A N O
t
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he marijuana industry is being integrated into mainstream American culture, and fast. Mostly, that’s a good thing: better products tested by better labs to imbibe in sleek new vaporizers that make the smelly old bong on your coffee table obsolete. The downside, though, is that the normalization of marijuana increasingly brings negative patterns in our culture into the previously cloistered world of weed. Enter Dab Girls. They’re mostly like the webcam girls— busty 20-somethings in lingerie who strip and perform for PayPal tips—except they also toke. Look around YouTube and Instagram and you’ll find these girls, getting followers by the thousands and sponsorships from glass and clothing companies. Many smokers see progress in this liberation of body and lung; they consider the girls to be clever entrepreneurs. But others feel this attitude will only solidify a place for misogyny in cannabis culture, pulling women backward on the track toward social equality. If you keep in mind that only a fraction of female smokers are taking scandalous selfies, this sparks a conversation about female stoners and empowerment in an increasingly marijuana-friendly world. Any barrel-chested smoker can rip a bong too hard and cough themselves to tears for 20 minutes, just as easily as the slightest pixie of a girl could exhale a smoke cloud bigger than any of the Blazers themselves. This gives stoners a space for equal respect, where gender, background and bong brand don’t matter—you’re either a hitter, or you’re not. With so many types of strains and methods of consumption, no one can be a professional at everything. Every plant has its own inconsistencies, and a strain that didn’t do much before could knock you off your feet in the next batch. However, the rise of concentrated hash oil has shot select smokers’ tolerances
Cannababes
through the roof. The phenomenon of sexy stoner girls gained momentum with girls who could “handle their dabs,” and these “dab girls” or “errl girls” wield major influence on social media. Not just any novice can take a graceful dab; the smoking tolerance and motor skills required to conduct a Web chat while dabbing is inarguably commendable. Instagram accounts like “bongbeauties” and “ganja.girls” have nearly 200,000 followers each, and touring promotional teams like the 420 Nurses participate in events
reach a lower shelf. Those that see such marketing tactics as “empowering” are confusing the definition of the word. Sexual empowerment is active. It is autonomous. To strip down and pose in ways that uphold the media’s sexualized image of women is to surrender, not to transcend. It is powerless. One of the tip jars at Cannababes reads, “Tip if you think we’re sexy,” only affirming that their value is determined by a hetero-male eye. The false sense of power when dressing “sexy” comes from meeting the expec-
female stoners can gain fame just by being themselves, without giving in to the easy option of getting attention with nudity.
for followers to meet their favorite girls and share a joint. Even Portland’s mom’n’-pop dispensaries follow well-known Dab Girls on social media in hopes of gaining some of their followers, regardless of content. And now one Portland medical dispensary is taking things to the next level. Cannababes on North Lombard Street is the first in the city to candidly capitalize on the “sexy stoner chick” angle. The management team hired attractive, friendly girls who fit the store’s particular brand (“no tattoos”) to pose for Instagram shots in which budtenders spank each other in short skirts. Several of Cannababes’ strategic shots capture a girl bending over to
tations of society, not breaking them. Not all is lost, however, because female smokers are getting attention for keeping their clothes on, too. Remember Charlo Greene, the “Fuck it, I quit” reporter who gained fame for quitting her newscasting job on air to run her marijuana dispensary? After a couple months in the spotlight, the pseudo-porn site Stoned Girls offered her $25,000 to pose nude. She posted her response on her Instagram: “I said no to @stoned_girls $25,000 offer to go nude but you never know... #gymtime now but #notittiestoday.” Her dismissal of the offer shows that even those with new names in a young industry aren’t afraid to refuse cashing in
on misogyny. Accepting the offer would have narrowed her renown to that of a hot ex-newscaster that smokes weed. Her confidence in her capacity as a business owner and advocate trumped relying on sexuality to get ahead, and that is real progress. A local example of stoner empowerment is a Portland budtender who goes by SheSmokesJoints on Instagram, where she has over 100,000 followers. She’s also our cover model this week. She posts pictures and videos of herself blowing intricate smoke rings and rolling flawless joints coated in hash oil. Her skills and her tolerance make her impressive, not her bra size. SheSmokesJoints proves that female stoners can gain fame just by being themselves, without giving in to the easy option of getting attention with nudity. The sexy-stoner trend feels a lot like watching a child pageant. The “innocence” of smoking weed to reflect, medicate, or connect with others is hindered by sexualization. It seems blasphemous; the best part about being a stoner is having that safe space to unplug from a high-pressure world. This selfie-sexuality wasn’t a part of being a stoner before now, and it ’s working against the efforts to educate the public about marijuana’s potential. These organizations contributing to the commodified use of women’s bodies are only aligning marijuana with tobacco and alcohol. Healthy normalization of marijuana depends on women who are honest about their lifestyles and aren’t willing to sacrifice who they are to fit in with the representation of female stoners as sex objects. Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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420
CO N T. PHOTOS BY DANIEL COLE
rec: the league TOURING THE SIX WASHINGTON WEED SHOPS NEAR PORTLAND.
The Herbery 212 NE 164th Ave., No. 11, Vancouver, Wash., 360-841-7500, theherberynw.com.
The strip-mall effect is grounding upon exit. You don’t feel like you just left somewhere interesting; it all seems very normal, like when you used to run out to RadioShack for batteries for that fucking wireless GameCube controller. TED LANAHAN.
Vancouver’s newest legal weed emporium, the Herbery, is in a green-and-white plaza, catty-corner from an O’Reilly Auto Parts, Mary Jane’s House of Glass, and—you can’t make this shit up—Blazzin Pizza. It’s everything you want in a 1980s car-focused shopping area. The store was even christened by Sir Mix-A-Lot. Inside the Herbery, it’s not an Apple 484 Evergreen Drive, North Bonneville, Store or even average medical dispen- Wash., 509-427-4393. sary chic. But it is clean and brightly lit, with three large jewelry cases holding The world’s first city-owned weed store, the goodies and various this no-frills shed in the mechanisms for their conwilds of North Bonnevsumption, with bongs ille, which sits across the located on shelves above river from Cascade Locks, the cases. The budtenders is a bold gambit by a city work in pairs behind each with a cash-flow problem. case, ready to find the Last year, the city manright bud for you. There ager used dwindling cash are two new ATMs by the reserves to form a public entrance for people who development authority want to pay cash for their that could apply for one of Pineapple Express instead Skamania County ’s two of using their debit card. state-issued marijuana Yes, they actually take sales licenses and build plastic here. this blue metal shack on There’s a large strain the edge of town. It opened selection—35 from eight last month, an occasion growers when I visited— marked by a “grand openTHE HERBERY ing ” banner hung between and it is indica-heav y. two concrete pylons off the They only had grams of Headband and a few sativa-dominant Evergreen Highway and visits from NPR, hybrids for sale. But I was told they have Al Jazeera and Bloomberg News. Inside people scouring farms for new strains this the shop—it’s got a gravel parking lot week, especially sativas. So, sativa man and a green velvet rope at the entrance— that I am, and despite a weekend-only spe- things were going well. It had $15 gram cial that seemed too good to be true—$40 bags from three Washington producers for one-eighth of an ounce of Orange and some of the friendliest and most chill Kush, $12 for a gram —I settled on Blue city employees you’ll ever encounter. MAJOR E. SKINNER. Hawaiian, a $20-a-gram giggle inducer.
The Cannabis Corner
CANNABIS COUNTRY STORE
Cannabis Country Store 1910 W Main St., Battle Ground, Wash., 360-723-0073, cannabiscountrystore.com.
If Battle Ground’s new Cannabis Country Store sold John Deere tractors, it would be perfect. Even without the farm gear, walking into this recreational pot shop in exurban Washington is something like walking through the tunnel that divides Disneyland’s Frontierland from Main Street, U.S.A. Outside, a sign that’s styled like an old corner saloon’s tips you off to the countrystore theme. But inside it’s amazing how much this shop has done to continue the theme, from the moment you get your head through the door and are asked to “make yourself at home” by a clerk with what seems to be a semi-authentic country accent. The large room is done up in classic Wild West style, with wood paneling, comfy red couches and a little Toby Keith on the stereo. This Country Store has 60-plus strains in stock, plus edibles, tinctures and a wide selection of glass paraphernalia in jewelry
cases. Like other shops in the newly competitive recreational weed scene, it runs street-price specials, like $10 grams of Agrijuana’s OG Kush. Constructive criticism? The place needs more deer heads, a few wooden barrels full of pickles, maybe some cannabisinfused beef jerky and a raffle for that green-and-yellow tractor mower, which the shop should display in all its glory in the middle of the floor. TED LANAHAN.
High End Market Place 1906 Broadway St., Vancouver, Wash., 360-695-3612, highendmarketplace.com.
Remember when you used to go to an old house in a run-down neighborhood to buy weed? There was a couch, a lazy dog, a big TV and, quite possibly, a Jimi Hendrix poster. Well, that’s a bygone world. Weed dealers don’t invite you over these days—if your guy isn’t someone you see socially, he delivers. So there’s something instantly nosCONT. on page 32
C H R I S R YA N P H O T O . C O M
PUT YER FEET UP BLUEBERRY HEADBAND Tasting and feeling like its title, this strain will have you relaxin’ and actin’ the fool, until you pass out without warning in the middle of Workaholics again. Goofy and playful with heavy couch lock, stay away from this during daytime or productive hours, but know you’ll sleep like a dog on a couch. Get it from DOGWALKER Collective Awakenings.
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AUROR A
CHEM TR AIL S
DOGWALKER
RIP CIT Y KUSH
Nap-inducing weed is stupid. Give me either daylong, conscious euphoria or a night time of deep, blissful sleep, I say! Aurora hits the latter sweet spot with a high that gently pulls, instead of pushes, my eyelids to sleep while its pine-and-roses aroma makes me think of hammocks. Get it from Green Goddess Remedies.
Get your GIFs ready, because this strain is going to make them great. The first thing you’ll notice is a rush to the forehead and face, followed by some trouble holding your head up, then a little spacing out, followed by a nap after you’ve dared to rest your eyelids. If you still suffer through latenight TV to fall asleep, this will make the hosts funnier. Get it from Collective Awakenings.
Rainy weekend mornings are made for this. With an aroma of pine and mud, this body high will sneak up on you but won’t mess with your head. Your face will droop, and you’ll get sleepy, but after a short nap, you’ll feel refreshed and not groggy. Get it from PDX TreeHouse Collective.
This piney potpourri makes me feel retired. Warm cheekbones with a trance not unlike long, headphone-clad coffeeshop work sessions made me crave delivery trucks but unable to muster energy enough to order delivery. Also a potent painkiller, it hits quick and strong, leaving the head clear but the back of your skull abuzz. Get it from PDX TreeHouse Collective. TYLER HURST.
Enter the
FINETOOTH / CC-SA-BY
Hood Life
Photography Contest
Pro Photo Supply and Willamette Week seek your best shots inspired by the mountain. Contest Opens: April 6 Contest Closes: May 4 at midnight bit.ly/hoodlifepix To submit your photo, head to Facebook.com/ProPhotoSupply and look for the “Photo Contest” tab, or simply follow this link: http://a.pgtb.me/PqS9Q. Limit one photograph per entrant. Winning photographs will be chosen by judges from Willamette Week and Pro Photo Supply. Winners will be contacted via email by May 8. Please note: By making your submission, you agree to let Willamette Week publish your photo in conjunction with the 2015 Outdoor Guide, in both digital and print formats.
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420
co n t.
talgic about Vancouver’s third shop, High End Market Place, which opened earlier this year. Situated in a century-old Craftsman just north of the downtown ’Couv, this little shop feels a lot like an old-school dealer’s house, except without the couches or video games or dog. The staff here is refreshingly jokey, and Jimi’s here, hanging by the fireplace. High End is in the Arnada neighborhood (Vancouver has neighborhoods!) on a relatively quiet street that has plenty of parking even if it’s not totally pedestrianfriendly (passing truck to me: “GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE STREET!”). It is right next to a lawyer’s office, Vancouver’s pre-eminent hipster dive bar, the Elbow Room, and a comic-book shop. It’s all very domestic, from the rhododendron bushes around the front porch to the wood-floored foyer, where there’s a desk and paintings of an owl and various woodland creatures on the walls. (Also, a really nice Jerry Garcia painting by a local artist—a Jerry Garcia painting so nice you’ll brief ly consider whether you could hang a Jerry Garcia painting in your home.) The walls have been torn out on the ground f loor, their shells forming seethrough bookshelves that’ve been stocked with glass. The flower selection is relatively limited compared to the other shops in the ’Couv—the cheapest offerings include Obama Kush and Blue Dream for $15 a gram. The selection of edibles is larger and comes from three makers. Unlike a lot of shops, it has prepackaged goods out on the counter for inspection, so you can actually look over the leaves you’re buying to make sure they’re not all stems and seeds. Remember that? MAJOR E. SKINNER.
new Vansterdam 6515 E Mill Plain Blvd., Vancouver, Wash., 360-597-4739, newvansterdam.com.
New Vansterdam is situated next to Safeway and a Jackson Hewitt tax preparation office in a thoroughly suburban stretch of town. Nearby, there’s a pay phone and a bus stop with cold, wet people from the surrounding apartment megaplexes. Inside, it smells like weed—well, like bong water—and there’s a security guard check-
ing IDs before you can even get to the ATM. After passing through another door, you enter a wide-open room with two counters where you can pick a strain or buy a bong. Vansterdam seems to be aiming for the Denver dispensary vibe, with reclaimed wood paneling and iPad minis for perusing the dossiers on available strains. A couple from Seattle is impressed: “This is so nice compared to the ones up there. It’s way cleaner.” You don’t really need the iPad to go through the 200-plus-item menu since there’s also a handy binder at each station. A little plastic spice jar has been repurposed for smelling samples, which the budtenders say they try to switch out every week. After you pick a strain, you go into a third room where there’s a cash register, then over to another station where you hand over your receipt and get a brown paper bag with your preweighed and packaged weed. MAJOR E. SKINNER.
Main Street Marijuana
NEW VaNstErdam
2314 Main St., Vancouver, Wash., 360828-7737, mainstmj.com.
Main Street Marijuana sits behind a frosted-glass window on the leafy northern edge of ’Couvian downtown. Inside, you probably won’t even see the security guard until you’re leaving, since he’s perched behind the door. The back wall is graffiti-styled, the light fixtures are from IKEA, and there’s a domesticated seating area with a leather couch and books—in other words, it looks just like your dealer’s house after his ladyfriend moved in. The menu is smaller than New Vansterdam’s, but there are more unusual strains, including a “historic first harvest” of Berry White from Life Gardens, which the budtender recommends. The place seems busy with old people asking endless questions about vape pens, but the budtender says business is slow, and it only takes about five minutes to get an order, which comes in a baggie with your name on it, just like at Starbucks, and a complimentary bowl, because you can never have too many bowls. MAJOR E. SKINNER.
HigH ENd markEt placE
YA S m i N E A B D U L R A H i m z i
SOCIAL
budda’s tONic
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PurPle elViS
Buddha’S tonic
Jilly Bean
Sour dieSel
Wedding c ake
Get down and deftly juggle multiple conversations with Purple Elvis tonight, as this sativadominant strain gives ADHD-like superpowers that allow for what at least looks like effective multitasking. You’ll chat with everyone at the party, but won’t remember a thing they said. Get it from Green Goddess Remedies.
Not all cannabis users want to get high out of their minds, and for those times there is the calming effects of Buddha’s Tonic. Bred as a high-CBD painkiller, you’ll get a feel-good almost buzz going, with a fraction of the usual sluggishness—a great pre-party or post-workout choice. Get it from Collective Awakenings.
The first thing you’ll notice is the silence. With a high that hits above and behind the eyes, and an inward focus, this strain smells of sweet sugar with the requisite energy boost. Great for people working on their feet, standup desks, or West Wing-style walk-andtalks. Get it from Green Goddess Remedies.
One whiff of this puckering fuel and you’ll be ready to get your groove on, but make sure you remember snacks. While it will give you the munchies, its clear-headed high makes it the perfect introvert’s party tonic. You’ll hate this in a quiet office, but love it come happy hour. Get it from Collective Awakenings.
Hybrid of legendary sativa strain Girl Scout Cookies and sleepy-time Cherry Pie, this strain will make you ponder your very existence. Unfortunately, it’s a bit like a weak but balanced energy drinkand-vodka combo in that regard, as you’ll say aloud great thoughts but have absolutely zero desire or ability to write them down. Get it from PDX TreeHouse Collective. TYLER HURST.
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e va n u g h e s
co n t.
the overdose tAKInG 100 MILLIGRAMS oF tHc IS not AWESoME. By Ty l e r H u r sT
I
243-2122
t’s 4:29 pm, which I know because that’s what’s showing on the microwave. I’m hunched over in my desk chair, chest on top of forearms on top of thighs. I’ve been asleep, though I don’t know for how long. I remember seeing 3:20 flash by on the microwave, up and out of my vision. Despite being folded in half, I feel somewhat rested, but more like a good airplane sleep than a real nap. I’m still not exactly sure what I’m supposed to be doing right now, but the phone rings and my wife asks about dinner and then a meeting and then I remember: I just got Squibbed. Squib is a popular medible from Lunchbox Alchemy out of Bend. You’re meant to eat a piece that looks like a miniaturized slice of cylindrical gum drop. Getting Squibbed can lead to dire side effects such as laziness, dizziness, hunger, dry mouth, thinking you’re funnier than you are and taking a longer nap than planned. I have ingested 100 milligrams of THC in a single sitting—three times as much as it would take to get me really, really high. A user with no tolerance needs about 12 milligrams to get high, and even the most
experienced users get flat-out baked at 50. I have done this on purpose, to see what happens when you overdose on marijuana. At 9:46 am on Wednesday, March 25, I peeled the sticker off the stack of four- to six-quarter-sized container, dug out the gummy Squib, gently peeled off the paper on the bottom and shoved the entire piece into my mouth. I gagged. The Squib, likely to help prevent melting in warm temperatures, was more solid than any gummy bear or Sour Patch Kid. I felt like I was chewing sweet wax. After some throat clearing, the entire piece slid down toward my stomach. Time to wait. How long until medibles take full effect? Most people say between an hour and two, depending on the amount of food in your stomach and how high your tolerance. While my tolerance isn’t close to wakeand-bake-every-day levels, I figured my almost-nightly one or two bowls meant I’d be feeling the effects in 45 to 90 minutes. Until then, I waited. While working to pass the time, I repeatedly congratulated myself for again not eating the paper wrapper, which I’ve done three times while taking small bites. I drank water. I finished my coffee. I prepped iTunes for what I assumed would be hours of movie watching. I went for a short run. At 11 am, I could feel it taking hold. The back of my head got a little heavy, my skin felt warm and my blood was pumping.
block south—it seemed like a dream. At 12:39 pm, I turned around and walked home, my pooch leading the way. At 12:43 pm, I arrived back home, with nothing to show for my walk but a happy dog. At 12:44 pm, I turned my camera on. At 11:30 am, I started to get loopy, sendAt 12:55 pm, I turned it off and imported ing texts to my family like this: “We buy the powder in a box because we’re cheap the footage. At 1:02 pm, I turned the camera back on. and have to baby or pet proof anything. At 1:07-ish pm, I turned it off. #humblebrag #didhejustuseahashtaginaAt 3:20 pm, I think I looked up at the text #yeshedid” And tweeting inane shit like this: “hash microwave, flashing up and out of my tagging texts and using incorrect words vision. At 4:29 pm I woke up, which I know this morning” because that’s what’s showing on the I thought it was funny. At around 11:45 am, a full two hours after microwave. I’m hunched over in my desk I ate the Squib, things got goofy. Knowing chair, chest on top of forearms on top of I needed an energy boost via caffeine and thighs. I’ve been asleep, though I don’t food, I made a plan to walk my dog to the know for how long. Despite being folded store. This decision took me 15 in half, I feel somewhat minutes. At noon, I found my shoes (I VIDEO: see Tyler rested, but more like a have 32 pairs, all in a shelf next HursT Baked ouT good airplane sleep than a real nap. I’m still not to the door). of His gourd aT exactly sure what I’m still At 12:15 pm, I found the wweek.com not exactly sure what I’m dog ’s collar hanging next to supposed to be doing right the door, like always. now, but the phone rings At 12:25 pm, I found the dog and my wife asks about dinner and then a in my 600-square-foot apartment. meeting and then I remember: I just got At 12:27 pm, I took her outside. At 12:31 pm, I walked with the dog Squibbed. Wait, what? toward Whole Foods, three blocks away. I have overdosed. On marijuana. At 12:35 pm, after having walked two This is not fun. You should not do this. blocks along East Burnside Street to 28th You won’t die—you’d have to eat the Avenue, I realized I didn’t know where Whole Foods was (it’s less than a block equivalent of 300,000 Squibs in 15 minutes to get close to dying—but this is not fun. from there). It’s 9 am on Thursday, nearly 24 hours At 12:37 pm, I longed for a coffee but didn’t want to risk crossing the street to after I got Squibbed. I am no longer high. I Starbucks, and Crema was so far—one like this. Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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LAUNCHING APRIL 20, 2015 AT 4:20 AM PACIFIC.
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MUSIC
MUSIC
DELICIOUS VINYL
KYLE KEY
CULTURE
and placers devoted to acts as unsung as Brian Cook. MAS. SPECIALIZATION: Psych rock, experimental. FIND OF THE DAY: Testify, a 1971 release from local pro wrestler Beauregarde featuring a 17-year-old Greg Sage on guitar.
FUTURE SHOCK
1914 E Burnside St., 327-8473, futureshockpdx.com. 11 am-9 pm daily.
Between the anime-style vinyl figurines, the weirdly stylish kitsch and handmade skateboards on the walls ($69, unique!), you almost could be in the world’s best store for designer kicks. But the weird, low-ceilinged shack by the Burnside Plaid Pantry is all about the kick drums, snares and brea ks, at that intersection of geek, toker and cool-kid DJ that describes maybe 30 percent of Portland. MATTHEW KORFHAGE.
IN PORTLAND, EVERY DAY IS RECORD STORE DAY. THIS IS A GUIDE TO ALL OF THEM. NORTH PORTLAND
BEACON SOUND
3636 N Mississippi Ave., wearebeaconsound.com. Noon-7 pm daily.
SPECIALIZATION: All things choppable or already chopped: hip-hop, old soul, generation upon generation of Ninja Tune, plus house, techno and electro. FIND OF THE DAY: The guy behind the counter was stoked on the new Sven Atterton, a chopped-up wallpaper of Minneapolis-style synth funk. I was sort of excited about a limited-edition Strawberry Shortcake platter for $8.
With its clean, minimalist design, Beacon Sound has the air of an art gallery, which might also owe to the fact that it’s connected to one. Either way, it belies the shop’s focus, which, while stocking the usual of-the-moment indie stuff, tilts avantgarde. On a recent visit, customers milled around the counter discussing Steve Reich and John Cage while crazy-making free jazz spilled from the store speakers. No one will judge you for only buying the new Sufjan, though. Not out loud, anyway. MATTHEW P. SINGER.
GREEN NOISE RECORDS
5857 SE Foster Road, 956-3110, greennoiserecords.com. Noon-7 pm Monday-Tuesday and ThursdaySaturday, noon-5 pm Sunday.
SPECIALIZATION: Cutting-edge electronic
and experimental music. FIND OF THE DAY: John Simeone, “Who Do You Love” b/w “Forever,” a ’70s soulfunk 7-inch worth $300.
MISSISSIPPI RECORDS
5202 N Albina Ave., 282-2990. Noon-7 pm daily.
Rightly regarded as one of the truly special record stores on the West Coast, if not the entire country, Mississippi Records piles all manner of curios—mostly of the blues, gospel and folk varieties, a good chunk of which were reissued via owner Eric Isaacson’s label of the same name—into a room resembling the den of that eccentric hermit at the end of the street you’ve been dying to become friends with. MPS. SPECIALIZATION: Rare blues, gospel and
pre-Beatles rock, as well as punk and garage rock. F I N D O F TH E DAY: A mint- co n d itio n original pressing of Atomic Bomb, a 1978 album by recently rediscovered Nigerian funk musician William Onyeabor.
VINYL RESTING PLACE
8332 N Lombard St., 247-9573, vinylrestingplace.com.
The pun probably worked better back when buying records seemed like grave-robbing, but even after the medium’s resurrection, Vinyl Resting Place, long one of St. Johns’ best-kept secrets, keeps a mostly vintage inventory. You won’t find any Best New Music selections, or much new anything, but there is a ton of reasonably priced old folk and country, plus a world-class jazz section allegedly frequented by Japanese collectors. MPS.
THE KING’S RANSOM: Inside Jackpot Records.
Ronettes Featuring Veronica, which sits behind glass with a $200 price tag.
NORTHEAST PORTLAND
ANTHEM RECORDS
2706 NE Sandy Blvd., 963-9000, anthemrecords.bandcamp.com. 3-7 pm Friday, noon-7 pm Saturday or by appointment.
Hidden in a narrow alley just off Sandy, A nthem Records is a small specialty store owned and operated by Jon AD, founder of the electronic music label Lo Dubs. But don’t expect to see anything as commercial as, say, the new Disclosure record sitting in the bins of vinyl stacked throughout the sparsely decorated shop. Instead, you’ll find a limited-edition orchestral metal album detailing the battle between Gandalf and the Balrog, a few fleetingly popular 3-inch CDs tacked onto a wall or selections of a genre called “Gabber.” KAITIE TODD. SPECIALIZATION: Electronic and metal. FIND OF THE DAY: Bryce Rohde Trio, Turn Right at New South Wales (1979).
JUMP JUMP MUSIC
7005 NE Prescott St., 284-4828. Noon5 pm Monday-Friday.
SPECIALTY: Folk, jazz, country, classic rock.
Jump Jump Music is one of the oldest record joints in Portland, with an emphasis on hip-hop, soul and jazz. While the store looks like something out of Hoarders, cluttered with boxes and dusty memorabilia, the records are intensely organized and the owner knows his stuff. ASHLEY JOCZ.
FIND OF THE DAY: Presenting The Fabulous
SPECIALIZATION: Hip-hop, R&B, soul, jazz.
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FIND OF THE DAY: The Baron Von Ohlen
Quartet featuring Mary Ann Moss, The Baron, a ’70s electronic jazz album of popular pop-song covers.
LITTLE AXE RECORDS
5012 NE 28th Ave., 320-3656. Noon-6 pm Wednesday-Monday.
Tucked inside a quaint Victorian house, Little Axe Records is a hidden gem in the Alberta neighborhood. While the store doesn’t boast much square footage, it’s got an extensive and in-depth collection of classics, hits, rarities and old Southern gospel. Displaying such records as Mississippi Delta Blues, Vol. 1 and the Endless Summer soundtrack, the store caters to every level of record geek. There’s an extensive cassette collection as well. AJ. SPECIALIZATION: World, folk and gospel. FIND OF THE DAY: MEV/AMM, Live Electronic Music Improvised (1970).
TURN! TURN! TURN!
8 NE Killingsworth St., 284-6019, turnturnturnpdx.com. 4-11 pm TuesdayThursday, 3 pm-midnight Friday-Saturday, 3-11 pm Sunday.
Turn! Turn! Turn! is the “renaissance man” of record stores. Not only does it have some of the best country vinyl in town, but it’s also a bookstore, a venue, a bar (with a killer craft beer menu), and even has a small vintage clothing selection—basically, everything awesome in one place. AJ. SPECIALIZATION: Rare country. FIND OF THE DAY: The Dead C, Harsh 70s
Reality (1992).
SOUTHEAST PORTLAND
BLYTHE & BENNETT RECORDS
3334 SE Belmont St., 234-6996, blytheandbennett.com. Noon-8 pm daily.
Residing in a small nook once occupied by the Di xie Mattress Co., Bly the & Bennett occupies a per fect niche on Belmont, where it sits next to Sweet Herea f ter, Stra ig ht From New York Pizza and Stumptown. Riding a booze or caffeine buzz? Blythe & Bennett stays open late (for a record store), so stop in and browse the impressive $2 record bins, where you’ll find everything from Fleetwood Mac’s self-titled album to Porter Wagoner compilations. The store also has the coolest listening station in town—a record player and pair of headphones inside an old phone booth. MICHAEL MANNHEIMER. SPECIALIZATION: Old and new rock with a heavy ’90s bent. FIND OF THE DAY: A rare copy of P, the self-titled record from the band Butthole Surfers singer Gibby Haynes started with Johnny Depp.
of used Polk Audio bookshelf speakers. MARTIN CIZMAR. SPECIALIZATION: Vintage college rock,
obscure hip-hop and electronic music. FIND OF THE DAY: Pearl Jam’s No Code (1996) on vinyl, $90.
CROSSROADS MUSIC
3130 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 232-1767, xro.com. 11 am-6 pm Monday-Thursday, 11 am-7 pm Friday-Saturday, noon-6 pm Sunday.
A flea market of a record store, Crossroads offers collections from more than 30 individuals on consignment. With so much used vinyl spanning most genres, some digging is required, but the friendly staff will help you find treasure. The shop also sells stereo equipment and boasts an impressive collection of local concert posters. MARK A. STOCK. SPECIALIZATION: Classic rock, jazz. FIND OF THE DAY: Roky Erickson’s The
P sychedelic B anjoman, a European release of songs recorded by the 13th Floor Elevators mastermind between 1976 and 1985.
CLINTON STREET RECORD AND STEREO
EXILED RECORDS
2510 SE Clinton St., 235-5323, clintonstreetrecordandstereo.com. 1-7 pm daily.
4628 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 232-0751, exiledrecords.com. 11 am-7 pm TuesdaySaturday, noon-5 pm Sunday.
Par t v intage stereo equipment shop, pa r t college-rock boutique, the tiny Clinton Street is a geek-focused shop for collectors and connoisseurs. They can set you up with a turntable (most run about $100) and a $50 copy of Mercury Rev’s Yerself Is Steam and even a $60 set
A petite but lauded shop known for its collection of rarities, bargain bins, international releases and zines. Sharing a complex with a liquor store and sandwich shop, Exiled feels like an industry secret, a delightful marriage of new and old records with helpful handwritten tags
The former location of this shop, which doubles as home base for local garage-rock label Dirtnap Records, got gentrified out of its Woodstock space because of a fancy sandwich shop. Now, it’s out on a scrubby stretch of Foster. The selection is large, and the entrance is well-stocked with punk zines. MC. SPECIALIZATION: Garage rock and punk. FIND OF THE DAY: Pretty much everything
Mean Jeans has recorded on vinyl.
JACKPOT RECORDS
3574 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 239-7561, jackpotrecords.com. 10 am-8 pm Monday-Saturday, 11 am-6 pm Sunday.
Jackpot’s original Hawthorne location (the larger downtown store closed last year) is as small and charming as an icecream parlor. Vintage signs dangle above tidy stacks of mostly contemporary CDs and vinyl. The shop opened in 1997 and has since coined a record label, reissuing work from the likes of Portland punk-rock pioneers the Wipers and Dutch garage experimentalists the Outsiders. MAS. SPECIALIZATION: Indie rock. FIND OF THE DAY: Grock by Crock, a frenetic prog-rock project from Quasi’s Sam Coomes and Hella’s Spencer Seim, of which only 500 neon-green vinyl copies were pressed.
MUSIC MILLENNIUM
3158 E Burnside St., 862-8826, musicmillenium.com. 10 am-10 pm MondaySaturday, 11 am-9 pm Sunday.
At 56 years old, the labyrinthine nooks and crevices in Portland’s oldest and most storied record store look as if they evolved naturally, like canyons carved into sand-
stone. They didn’t. The store is in heavy rearrangement, with an extra vinyl room in the works because one wall of the current vinyl room will soon have a bar and cafe serving up libations for shoppers and the lookie-loos at Portland’s busiest instore show venue. Next up? Dead fucking Moon on Record Store Day, April 18. MK. SPECIALIZATION: Everything is special. Nothing is special. FIND OF THE DAY: A first pressing of Led Zeppelin I with turquoise lettering recently sold for $1,000.
SMUT VINTAGE
7 SE 28th Ave., 235-7688, smutportland.blogspot.com. Noon-7 pm Monday-Friday, 11 am-7 pm Saturday, 11 am-6 pm Sunday.
Smut is a lot like that remote corner of your dad’s weird bachelor friend’s basement you snuck glances at while no one was looking: kitschy beer signs and vintage porn galore, as well as a small but eclectic selection of vinyl that coalesces more around facial-hair preferences than genre. The soul and funk section has been raided several times over by local revivalist DJs, but the pool of classic rock and AM gold favorites is as wide as it is deep. PETE COTTELL.
CULTURE
FOR A MAP OF EVERY PORTLAND RECORD STORE, SEE WWEEK.COM
Hot Topics, even the music haters among us should leave happy. JAY HORTON. Specialization: No one in town carries more metal. Find of the day: Samurai ( 197 1), an exceedingly rare self-titled prog-psych LP from former members of U.K. jazz fusion outfit the Web.
EVERYDAY MUSIC
1313 W Burnside, 274-0961; 1931 NE Sandy Blvd., 239-7610, everydaymusic.com. 9 am-11 pm daily.
Among the vinyl-adorned pillars and magazine-clipping-collaged electrical boxes of Everyday Music’s library-style layout—a décor my companion deemed “industrialmeets-dollar store”—you’ll find what is likely the largest collection of vinyl in the city. If you uncover a used $2 Stevie Wonder record after staring at the spidery wall decals from an old Of Montreal album, it shouldn’t be a surprise. KT.
SPECIALIZATION: Mustachioed 8-track favorites, modern hip-hop. FIND OF THE DAY: Iggy Pop’s The Idiot (1977), $40.
Day’s Night, $80.
SONIC RECOLLECTIONS
PLATINUM RECORDS
2701 SE Belmont St., 236-3050, sonicrec.com. Noon-6 pm Tuesday-Saturday.
Sonic Recollections is not of its time. In a neighborhood overrun by new developments, the store—which is about to celebrate its 25th anniversary—is a callback to the record stores of our parents’ past, with an eclectic collection of used vinyl that stocks jazz and classical and plenty of classic-rock staples. This place has everything from old Al Jolson 45s and used Tom Petty records to a “soul” section stocked with five 2Pac joints and a copy of St. Louis rapper Chingy’s 2004 album, Powerballin’, among multiple Temptations greatest-hits collections. MM. SPECIALIZATION: Used pop and rock LPs
from the ’60s to the ’90s. FIND OF THE DAY: A super-rare copy of early Portland punk band Sado-Nation’s 7-inch EP from 1980 that, selling for $300, is less than any listing on Discogs.
SOUTHWEST/NORTHWEST
2ND AVENUE RECORDS
400 SW 2nd Ave., 222-3783, 2ndavenuerecords.com. 11 am-8 pm Monday-Friday, 10 am-8 pm Saturday, noon-6 pm Sunday.
A downtown mainstay for more than three decades, 2nd Avenue’s impeccably curated embarrassment of vinyl riches caters to just about every taste imaginable. Aging scenesters eye “Cowboy Classics” 78s stacked below the yawning reggae selection. Tattooed tweeners leaf through hardcore 45s probably recorded before they were born. A hyper-disciplined organization of goods dispels any whiff of the flea market and, with enough artist tees hanging from the rafters to fill a dozen
SPECIALIZATION: If you need the new
Death Cab or Decemberists, they got you. FIND OF THE DAY: A mono copy of A Hard
104 SW 2nd Ave., 222-9166, platinum-records.com. 11 am-7 pm Monday-Saturday, noon-6 pm Sunday.
Although the larger back room of DJ gear and PA systems may now attract the lion’s share of business, Platinum Records still boasts a daunting supply of ’70s funk, ’80s R&B and block-rocking white labels. Give prospective purchases a spin at listening stations set up below signed testimonials from DJ Dan and Mix Master Mike. JH. SPECIALIZATION: Dance music. FIND OF THE DAY: Test pressing of Candy
(1979) by Con Funk Shun.
LANDFILL RESCUE UNIT 400 NW Couch St., 679-8579. 11 am-7 pm daily.
Housed within Old Town’s Floating World Comics, this teensy record store might appear to be just an outgrowth of fourcolor wares. But Landfill’s separately owned and operated area—soon to have a designated sales associate three to five days a week (and weekends)—catches the eye through graffiti-scrawled, specially constructed wooden dumpsters whose hidden shelves roll outward to reveal vinyl treasures. JH. SPECIALIZATION: Punk, hardcore. FIND OF THE DAY: Sleep’s Dopesmoker
(2003), on Tee Pee Records, for $75.
Note: As we began this piece, Discourage Records, at 1737 SE Morrison St., was temporarily closed. It reopens April 15. Look for its entry online. MORE: Record Store Day is Saturday, April 18. For events and deals from participating stores, see wweek.com.
Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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AUGUST 15-16, 2014
APRIL 30TH, OMSI
15-16, 2014Sportswear Company present: TechfestNWAUGUST and Columbia
A SHARED FUTURE
A FRANK CONVERSATION ABOUT INNOVATION AND GROWTH ACROSS THE SHARING ECONOMY
GET YOUR TICKETS: http://bit.ly/ tfnw15tickets
DAVID PLOUFFE SENIOR VICE PRESIDENT OF POLICY AND STRATEGY - UBER David Plouffe is widely referred to as the “architect” of President Obama’s two presidential campaign victories. He served as the campaign manager in the 2008 presidential election and served inside the White House as Senior Advisor to the President from 2011-2013. In September 2014, Plouffe joined Uber.
AARON EASTERLY
MARCELO LOURIERO
SARAH MASTROROCCO
CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER - ROVER
CEO - SPINLISTER
BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT - INSTACART
Aaron brings 15 years of tech-industry experience to Rover, which connects dog lovers with dog boarders and which was named 2014 Startup of the Year by GeekWire.com. Aaron’s four-pound Pomeranian, Caramel, is a frequent visitor to Rover’s headquarters.
Marcelo Louriero turned his lifestyle and love of surfing, bike and snowboarding into a career and serves as chief executive officer for Spinlister, a peer to peer bike rental company.
Sarah builds and develops sustainable partnerships with local, regional, and national retailers and consumer packaged goods companies.
MAYOR CHARLIE HALES Since taking office in 2013, Mayor Hales has modernized Portland’s sharing economy- an economy that started with public libraries 100 years ago- by allowing companies like Airbnb and Uber to operate legally in the city.
STEVE GUTMANN
MALIA SPENCER
VP OF BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT - STUFFSTR
REPORTER - PORTLAND BUSINESS JOURNAL
Steve is a regular renter, via sharing economy companies, of his home, his bike and even his driveway.
Malia Spencer covers technology, startups and entrepreneurs for the Portland Business Journal. She holds a master’s in Journalism from the Medill School of Journalism at Northwestern University.
Tickets $30 * Ticket includes happy hour from 4-5:30PM, speakers from 5:30-8PM, April 30th 40
Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
STREET
STREET
LOOKS WE LIKE SNAPSHOTS FROM THE WEEK. P H OTOS BY LU CAS CHEMOTTI wweek.com/street
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MUSIC: Every record shop in town. DRANK: Surviving the Craft Brewers Conference. BAR REVIEW: A sushi bar, but for cheese. MOVIES: The History of Rock ’n’ Roll, Part 1.
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WEED AND BREWS, WEED AND BREWS… panic/don’t panic: The future of Foster-Powell’s historic Bob White Theatre is in limbo after negotiations broke down between the property’s owner and the manager who hoped to rehab it. Manager Nick Haas announced April 13 that owner Nick Storie won’t accept his offer to buy the theater, and the Portland fire marshal deemed the concert venue unfit for dancing. The two Nicks have been negotiating for six months. Haas says the theater needs a complete seismic upgrade, fire sprinklers, HVAC and more that would cost up to $1 million. Storie says he’s already spent more than $200,000 on renovations since buying the abandoned theater in 2012. >> Northeast Sandy Boulevard’s Tonic Lounge—home to everything from extreme metal to open-mic comedy— had an episode of Spike TV’s Bar Rescue filmed there April 12. The new name chosen by the show? The Panic Room. Amid a weird new food menu of flatbreads, the very L.A.-looking industrial décor included an expensive-looking new lighting setup and a host of tiled flat-screen TVs. telephone game: Portland native Nathan Langston will reveal the results of a massive, two-year, interdisciplinary game of telephone on April 20, involving 300 artists from 159 cities in 42 countries—with 22 Portland artists, including poet Martha Grover, musician Matt Dabrowiak (Menomena) and photographer Alicia Rose. The Telephone Project’s artists were prompted with a still-undisclosed phrase, then a chain of other artists interpreted each other’s work in different media. The Portland launch party—alongside simultaneous parties in London, New York and Copenhagen—will begin at 7 pm April 20 at Velo Cult, with a performance by composer Richie Greene. See the project online starting April 20 at telephone. satellitecollective.org, or go to wweek.com for more details.
BEYOND THE PRINT
DO YOU LIKE FREE STUFF? Sign up for our newsletter, Willamette Week’s promotions and events weekly email including WW event picks, things to eat, drink, places to go and more!
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eat mobile: Eat Mobile, Portland’s annual food-cart festival, will actually be mobile this year. On April 29, from 5 to 9 pm, buses will shuttle attendees between cart buki pods that have beer on tap. A $40 ticket buys samples from 25 carts, including Buki, the Japanese streetfood cart that was one of our new favorites of the past year. Get tickets at wweek.com/eatmobile.
ADAM WiCkHAM
NEWSLETTER
Have an event you would like to feature? Email promotions@wweek.com for details.
drink up: Curious about all the people drinking in the used-car lot on the east side of the Burnside Bridge? That’s the new Bailey’s Taproom. Bailey’s owner Geoff Phillips rented the lot at 419 E Burnside St. for a pop-up beer party during the Craft Brewers Conference. Bailey’s bartenders and Josh Grgas of the Commons came up with the idea during WW’s Oregon Beer Awards, but Phillips was briefly thwarted when the lot was scheduled to be bulldozed this month to make way for apartments. When the lot’s destruction got pushed back a month, the party commenced. It runs through Saturday, April 18. Then, the lot will be reclaimed by the type of day drinkers who bring their own bottles.
HEADOUT
GO:
The Craft Brewers Conference, the South by Southwest of beer, descends on Portland this week. Big, bearded dudes from across the nation will line the rails of our city’s strip clubs. WILLAMETTE WEEK
WHAT TO DO THIS WEEK IN ARTS & CULTURE
Poppin’Tops
Five Portland strip clubs with great beer.
WEDNESDAY APRIL 15
JACK WHITTINGTON
CASCADE BREWING SOUR AND WILD BEER INVITATIONAL [BEER] A huge showcase of sour beers in Portland’s “House of Sour,” with little-seen offerings from across the country. It all happens inside the pop-up expansion west of the Cascade Barrel House, with a rotating cast of 8-ounce pours. Cascade Barrel House, 939 SE Belmont St., 265-8603, cascadebrewingbarrelhouse.com. Through April 18. Cash only. Free entry.
1. Acropolis
8325 SE McLoughlin Blvd., 231-9611, acropolispdx.com. 7 am-2 am MondaySaturday, 11 am-2 am Sunday. Oh, the Acropolis. Weird statues. Three stages. Salad bar. Cheap steaks from the owner’s ranch. Japanese tour buses parked out front. And 65 taps. They are chosen seemingly at random, sure, meaning you end up with beers from Northwest Brewing out of Pacific, Wash., a seasonal from Ninkasi, a chocolate porter from Three Creeks in Sisters, Ore., and Green Flash’s excellent IPA.
THURSDAY APRIL 16 AMERICAN HOT WAX [ROCK FILM] Rock critic Greil Marcus will introduce this 1978 film about pioneering DJ Alan Freed, aka Moondog, and the birth of American rock ‘n’ roll. Jay Leno gets screen time playing Freed’s driver. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium, 1219 SW Park Ave., 221-1156, $9.
2. DV8
LEON BRIDGES [GOSPEL SOUL] Lord Huron, tonight’s headliner, is indie-folk graywater, but opener Leon Bridges is a pristine black-and-white photograph. The 25-year-old prodigy doesn’t even have an album out yet, but his authentically antiquated doo-wop soul already has critics buzzing. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 225-0047. 9 pm. $20 advance, $22 day of show. All ages.
5021 SE Powell Blvd., 772-2907, dv8.cc. 2 pm-2:15 am daily. DV8 is a neighborhood hangout in the daytime, complete with a pool table separate from the stages, before transitioning into a bustling business in the red-lit night. Its most mysterious offering is DV8 Amber, a contractbrewed beer whose identity is guarded as closely as the dancers’ legal names.
FRIDAY APRIL 17
3. Mary’s Club
129 SW Broadway, 227-3023, marysclub. com. 11 am-2:30 am Monday-Saturday, 11:30 am-2:30 am Sunday. Cascade has two big draft accounts. Both are at clubs that brewery owner Art Larrance likes to visit. The first is the Multnomah Athletic Club, a gym for Portland’s high rollers. The second is Mary’s, the West Coast’s oldest strip club. Mary’s, which sits across from Bailey’s Taproom, is the former workplace of Courtney Love and home to dancers who pick their songs from an onstage jukebox. Alongside a mostly standard array of Mirror Pond, Rogue and Ninkasi, pick up Cascade’s Mary’s Topless Blonde, or a Becky’s Black Cat Porter from Seven Brides.
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Parkrose/Sumner TC SOUL HARMONY [THEATER] In the late 1940s, a fledgling black soul group, The Vibranaires, sang through the phone for young Jewish songstress Deborah Chessler. Some cite that call as R&B’s conception. Stumptown Stages’ musical profiles Chessler and modern soul’s coming-of-age during desegregation. E Burnside Brunish Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 248-4335, 7:30 pm, $43.65.
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927 SE Morrison St., 231-1606, sassysbar.com. 10:30-2:30 am daily. The venerable Sassy’s has by far Portland’s best strip-club beer list, with 35 taps of mostly craft beer, including those from Pelican (cream ale), Barley Brown’s (breakfast stout), and always a couple from Boneyard, not to mention an occasional obscurity like a brown from Redmond’s Cascade Lakes. Need more incentive? Craft taps are $2.50 before 7 pm. MATTHEW KORFHAGE.
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2839 NW St. Helens Road, 222-6600. 11 am-2:30 am daily. Portland’s original vegan strip club—a distinction now needed, as there are three—is in a funny house at the edge of the Northwest Industrial District. It boasts a respectable little tap list, including Sinistor Black from 10 Barrel, the Optimist IPA from Fort George, and Oakshire Amber. Beers are served by bartenders who are usually just as topless as the dancers.
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YASIIN BEY + BAD BRAINS [PUNK-A-RAOKE] For the first time anywhere, the rapper-actor formerly known as Mos Def fronts the legendary D.C. hardcore band. It remains to be seen if he can match the vocal elasticity of Bad Brains’ original singer, H.R., but based on his last Portland appearance, Bey is almost there in terms of onstage weirdness. Roseland Theater, 8 NW 6th Ave., 971-230-0033. 9 pm. $32.50-$45. 21+.
UPSET, COLLEEN GREEN [POWER POP] How’s this for a perfect bill: California songwriter and Descendents fanatic Green opening for power-pop lifers Upset, featuring ex-Hole drummer Patty Schemel and singer Ali Koehler of Vivian Girls and Best Coast? Sometimes you’re just too good for words, rock gods. Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water Ave., 328-2865. 9:30 pm. $10 advance, $12 day of show. 21+.
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FOOD & DRINK THURSDAY, APRIL 16 Merit Badge Cocktail Pop-Up
This actually can’t go wrong. Bunk will offer little versions of its sandwiches for $5, after the hours when it normally would be closed. And the Merit Badge cocktail folks will offer cocktails for $5. So, if our math is right, $10 will get you a drink and a snack. If you say a secret word, you apparently get a free drink. We won’t tell you what it is, because it isn’t sporting, but it rhymes with schmirit schmanimal. Bunk Sandwiches, 621 SE Morrison St., 477-9515. 6-9 pm.
sweet with a bunch of raw honey from Old Blue, and meads from Nectar Creek. So, like, honey drinking porridge, honey-roasted fruit, honey-baked beans, honey-cured bacon, honeycomb candy, and then mead cocktails. Plus other stuff. Swwweeeeeet. Cocotte, 2930 NE Killingsworth St., 227-2669. Seatings at 9:30 am and noon. $50 includes one cocktail and tip.
FRIDAY, APRIL 17
Where to eat this week.
Basque Supper Club
1. Noraneko
Basque stuff is mysterious and such. The language, the crazy yeast in the cider, drunk Americans screwing around in the fountains of Pamplona. But chef Javier Canteras has been traveling to the Basque Country since he was a kid, and will prepare a six-course meal of the region’s specialties filtered through his own experience, from leekchorizo porrusalda to blood-sausagestuffed squid. One thing that remains mysterious, however? The location. He won’t tell you till you sign up for a dinner at basquesupperclub.com. 6:308:30 pm. $65.
Rare Beers at Jackknife
For one Friday, from open to close, it’s all about the crazy brews (probably being drunken happily by Craft Brewers Conference attendees staying at the Sentinel). Beers from Quebec, Japan and the various Europes, including farmhouses, a chocolate chipotle porter from England, and a salt beer from Denmark. A note, though? We advise you to show up early. Some will tap out, and when the bar fills it gets really hard to order. Jackknife, 614 SW 11th Ave, 384-2347. 3 pm.
SATURDAY, APRIL 18 Boedecker Pairings Dinner
The Simpatica chefs—those same folks behind Laurelhurst Market—will pair up with Portland’s Boedecker Cellars for a five-course wine pairings dinner including scallop crudo, goat’s milk truffles, duck ham from Laurelhurst, lamb shank with preserved cherry jus, and strawberry-rhubarb tiramisu. Simpatica, 828 SE Ash St., 235-1600. 7 pm. $80 includes wine.
SUNDAY, APRIL 19
I
Honey Brunch
No, honey brunch is not a term of endearment from someone with a speech impediment. Rather, it’s a fourcourse “fancy toast” meal gone all
1430 SE Water Ave., 238-6356, noranekoramen.com. Gabe Rosen and Biwa’s new Water Avenue ramen-ya expands its Sun Noodle offerings to include shio, miso and veggie broths, but for now the best addition is an extension of the original izakaya’s meaty strengths: a tender, lovely pork-belly chasyu. $.
2. Apizza Scholls
4741 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 233-1286, apizzascholls.com. Portland’s best pizza is now available for lunch or brunch on weekends, with personal pies topped with freaking eggs and bacon. And spinach and chilies and such. $$.
3. Bamboo Sushi
1409 NE Alberta St., 889-0336, bamboosushi.com. Bamboo has swapped out its Alberta izakaya for another sushi restaurant, but it’s opted to hang on to some of the successes from the izakaya in the bargain. Also, it’s apparently planting seagrass to become the first fully carbon-neutral restaurant in the world. Which leads us to believe we should also plant some seagrass. $$.
4. Smokehouse Tavern
1401 SE Morrison St., Suite 117, 971-279-4850. The new Smokehouse Tavern, a finely wrought affair in taxidermy and metallic wallpaper, has great barbecue, sure—but holy crap. It also has some of the best potato salad in town, with that rare perfect balance of cream and acidic tang. $$.
5. Dog Town
2880 SE Division St., 971-232-1232, dogtownfoodcart.com. This little hot-dog cart at Tidbit is quietly knocking its wieners out of the ballpark, with house-baked buns, crazy-ass Philly steak and pulledpork concoctions atop all-beef dogs, Aussie lamb sausage, and a Sonoran unafraid to burn out the tip of your tongue. $.
Shandong www.shandongportland.com
BEER WITHOUT BADGES
EMMA BROWNE
= WW Pick. Highly recommended. By MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Editor: MARTIN CIZMAR. Email: dish@wweek.com. See page 3 for submission instructions.
NINE KILLER CRAFT BREWERS CONFERENCE EVENTS FOR EVERYONE.
LIVE FROM THE BARREL: It’s Cascade beer!
So your buddy who cleans kegs at Laurelwood didn’t come through with that badge for the Craft Brewers Conference? Damn, didn’t see that coming. Well, it’s OK because not everyone gets to be a functioning alcoholic who writes off daytime drinking as dedication to their craft. Luckily, brewers don’t like to drink alone and are throwing plenty of parties around town that are open to the public. Here are the ones we are most thirsty for. EZRA JOHNSON-GREENOUGH.
WEDNESDAY, APRIL 15 Cascade Brewing Sour and Wild Beer Invitational
Portland’s “House of Sour” is hosting the CBC’s largest sour beer showcase, featuring daily tappings from Cascade’s own sours along with little-seen offerings from across the country. It all happens inside the pop-up expansion west of the Cascade Barrel House, and the beer comes in 8-ounce pours that will rotate through over five days. Cascade Barrel House, 939 SE Belmont St., 265-8603, cascadebrewingbarrelhouse.com. 3-11 pm WednesdayThursday, 3 pm-midnight Friday, noon-midnight Saturday, April 15-18. Cash only. Free entry.
Roscoe’s SoCal Brewers Summit
One of the most diverse beer lineups at any CBC event will be at Roscoe’s, a hidden gem in Montavilla. Roscoe’s has pulled out all the stops, including driving kegs up from San Diego. Many Southern California brewers are coming to Portland for the first time, including Modern Times, Beachwood BBQ, Golden Road, Cismontane, Saint Archer, Highland Park, Monkish and more. Taster trays will be available. Roscoe’s, 8105 SE Stark St., 255-0049, roscoespdx.com. 4 pm. Free entry.
The Acid Test
This barrel-aged sour beer tap takeover at a Southeast dive bar is one of those special events that wouldn’t exist without the CBC. The featured breweries are California’s Firestone Walker, whose sour beers are rarely seen here, and Cascade, known locally for its wide range of sours. Bluegrass and Southern rock from Weekend
themed warehouse party with metal sculptures and, of course, beer-dispensing machines. Burlesque performers, contortionists and high-wire acts will also tantalize. Pure Space, 1315 NW Overton St., deschutesbrewery. com/event/beermachines. 8 pm. $20 advance, $25 at door.
Boneyard Beergasm Fest
Assembly and Black Lodge will keep things banging. Bear Paw Inn, 3237 SE Milwaukie Ave., 239-9208. 7 pm. Free entry.
Gigantic & Friends at Apex
The expansive Apex patio is a nice place to enjoy this kick-ass lineup of Gigantic Brewing and other beers from notable breweries in the U.S. and Canada—3 Floyds (Indiana), Solemn Oath (Illinois), the Lost Abbey (California), Beau’s All Natural (Ontario), Sun King (Indiana) and Surly (Minnesota). This ticketless event features barrel-aged barleywines and stouts, fruit sours and a tequila-barrelaged IPA. Get there early if you can. Apex, 1216 SE Division St., 273-9227 apexbar.com, 2 pm. Free entry.
Collaborative Brewers Dinner
Perhaps the classiest way to enjoy the fruits of Portland hosting the CBC is at this dinner presented by farm-to-table restaurant Ned Ludd and Breakside Brewery. Other breweries represented are Jester King, Moody Tongue, Melvin and Crooked Stave. Two beers from each brewery will be paired with such dishes as raw scallop, cocoa tajarin, and gin-spiced sturgeon in a fivecourse, 10-beer dinner. Elder Hall (Ned Ludd), 3929 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-4725, nedluddpdx.com. Two seatings: 6 and 8:30 pm. $90.
THURSDAY, APRIL 16 Deschutes/Columbia Beer Machines
Deschutes is among Oregon’s most respected breweries, and when they get the itch to party, they do it right. In collaboration with Columbia Distributing, Deschutes is presenting “Beer Machines,” a steampunk-
Possibly the CBC’s hottest ticket, Boneyard’s party at Green Dragon will feature some of the most soughtafter rare beers from the likes of 3 Floyds, Alpine, Hollister and, of course, Boneyard. They will be served beneath waves of live punk rock. Green Dragon, 928 SE 9th Ave., 5170660, boneyardbeer.com/beergasm. 5 pm. $25 includes glass and five beer tickets; $2 for each additional ticket.
Wild Stallions
If a collaboration between Denver’s Crooked Stave, one of America’s most influential wild/sour brewers, and Bend’s much-loved Crux Fermentation Project isn’t enough, then the addition of Allagash should be. We haven’t seen Allagash’s Belgian-style beers, which come from the other Portland, in a few years. If you’re missing them, then this is the place to be. Allagash hasn’t just sent their classic lineup, though, they’re bringing beers from their influential wild and sour beer collection. The Hop & Vine, 1914 N Killingsworth St., 954-3322, thehopandvine.com. Free entry.
Amber Waves: The Art of American Craft Beer
Castaway—it’s sort of a hipster party center for W+K types in the industrial Northwest—is the site of this visual arts show and beer fest presented by Pennsylvania’s Victory and Delaware’s legendary Dogfish Head breweries. More than 20 breweries will each contribute an amber-colored beer, along with a custom art piece commissioned exclusively for a silent auction to be held during the event. All proceeds will be donated to the Portland Institute for Contemporary Art, so you can feel good about supporting the arts while you get your buzz on. Castaway, 1900 NW 18th Ave., 224-4898, amberwavesevent.com. 5 pm. $25.
Happy Hour
Shandong Monday–Saturday 4–6pm & 8pm–close
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THE SEVEN WONDERS OF BEERVANA ONLY IN PORTLAND... BY MA RTIN CIZMA R
MCIZMAR@WWEEK.COM
Looking to get in touch with Portland’s beer culture this week? Well, you could go where the national beer magazines send you, enjoying Rogue’s carpet-flavored beer then heading over to Apex for musty IPA from past-their-prime kegs, something you’ll learn only after paying cash, because there are no complimentary tasters and the brusque bartenders have no time to answer your questions. But here’s the thing about Portland: Our beer scene is better than gimmick beers and crappy imitations of Toronado. Our best beer experiences, in fact, are things you won’t find anywhere else in the world. Here are seven only-in-Portland experiences for the discerning beer geek. Slurp dan dan noodles at the nation’s only Szechuan brewpub... BTU Brasserie (5846 NE Sandy Blvd., 971407-3429, btupdx.com) is a “traditional Chinese restaurant” with a seven-barrel brewing system. I recommend the Szechuan chicken or the Ants Climbing a Tree, a big bowl of slightly sticky cellophane noodles that delivers a huge umami punch thanks to ground pork, tree ear mushrooms and a roasty soybean sauce. (If you want Szechuan spiciness, be pushy about asking for it.) Catch a flick among the nation’s largest concentration of beer theaters... Blame it on the rain: Portland loves sitting indoors with old movies and beer. As far as we can tell, with 15 theaters that will serve you a pint, this city has more places where you can drink while watching a big-screen movie than anywhere else in the country—New York and L.A. not excepted. There are a bunch of great theaters to choose from, but the best experiences are east of the river at Hollywood Theatre (4122 NE Sandy Blvd., 493-1128, hollywoodtheatre.org) and Laurelhurst Theater (2735 E Burnside St., 232-5511, laurelhursttheater. com). Both have popcorn, pizza and, of course, beer. The Laurelhurst charges just $4 a ticket. Bask in our wealth of beer books at Powell’s... Portland must have the largest concentration of professional beer writers in North America, which you’ll see if you go to our square-block, three-story independent bookstore, Powell’s City of Books (1005 W Burnside St., 800-8787323, powells.com). We’re not going to bullshit you: WW’s annual Beer Guide magazine, a tour
of every brewery within an hour of town, is the best resource available. But you might also want to flip through books by Lisa “Beer Goddess” Morrison, Brian Yaeger, Pete Dunlop and Lucy Burningham. Or pick up one of Fred Eckhardt’s classic tomes on homebrewing. Or pre-order Jeff Alworth’s magnum opus, The Beer Bible, which finally hits shelves in August. Pucker up at the House of Sours... The nation’s most extensive and ambitious sour beer program resides here at Cascade Barrel House (939 SE Belmont St., 265-8603, cascadebrewingbarrelhouse.com), where you’ll find seemingly endless explorations into spiced and fruited blends such as honey, lime and ginger. It gets spendy, but treat yourself to the tasters. Just think of it like wine, which is what brewmaster Ron Gansberg was making before getting into the beer biz. Boneyard and Barley Brown’s IPAs at Sassy’s... Two things Oregon does better than anyone: casual, fully nude strip clubs and IPAs. There are a handful of clubs worth checking out (see page 43), but Sassy’s (927 SE Morrison St., 231-1606, sassysbar.com) is a must-hit, especially because two beloved Oregon breweries, Boneyard and Barley Brown’s, have permanent taps. There’s also going to be a great party there (page 45). Give your beer money to charity... The nation’s first and so-far only nonprofit brewery, Ex Novo (2326 N Flint Ave., 894-8251, exnovobrew.com), has come a long way since it opened last summer. The 10-barrel brewery donates its proceeds to supporting Syrian refugees and mentoring underprivileged kids. Try new brewmaster Jason Barbee’s just-released double IPA, Dynamic Duo, which has a light, bright body and a big citrus punch from Citra and Chinook hops. Taste obscurities at a far-flung cart pod... More than any other large U.S. city, craft is king in Portland: Every bar, restaurant and food-cart pod accepts delivery of nanobrew from a guy brewing it around the corner. About half of the inner city’s cart pods now have beer bars. But if you want to see what Stumptown is all about, go out to Pod Bar (5205 SE Foster Road, facebook. com/cartsonfoster), which is run by Steve Woolard, who also operates the Spring Beer & Wine Fest. Woolard is obsessive about finding beers from the smallest, newest breweries in town to put on tap. “People look at the list and say, ‘Wow, I don’t know anything on there,” he said a few weeks ago. “And it’s like, ‘Yeah!’” That, folks, is what Portland’s all about.
FOOD & DRINK
LIVE THROUGH THIS WHAT YOU NEED TO SURVIVE CBC. BY E ZR A J O H N S O N - G R E ENO UGH
243-2122
WE SELL DRINKS
WALKING SHOES Thanks to City Hall and Portland’s powerful taxi lobby, Uber is not operating here yet. Luckily, from the Oregon Convention Center you can walk to a bunch of breweries in 20 minutes or less: Burnside (11 minutes), Upright (16 minutes), Base Camp (17 minutes), the Commons (19 minutes), Hair of the Dog (20 minutes) and Cascade Barrel House (21 minutes, but I have faith you’ll be able to shave off a minute).
HYDRATION Purchase a six-pack of bottled water. Dump out the water and replace it with Full Sail Session. You’re in Portland, put on your big-boy pants. PHONE APPS In addition to the obvious Craft Brewers Conference app, you’re going to want to download the “TriMet Tickets” app that will allow you to purchase public transportation tickets from your phone as well as check arrival times for buses. You can also download the “Curb” app to get a taxi—don’t bother trying to hail one in Portland. DOUGHNUTS Portland is awash in sugary bakery products sometimes encrusted with Froot Loops or bacon, and they make a terrific late-night snack or early-morning pick-me-up. We love them so much there is even a CBC Baker’s Dozen coffee beer-and-doughnut pairing recovery event on Saturday, April 18. But do us all a favor and avoid the Voodoo Doughnut tourist train and instead hit up Blue Star Donuts (1237 SW Washington St., 921 NW 23rd Ave., 3549 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 3753 N Mississippi Ave., bluestardonuts.com). OTHER BOOZE Once you’re sick of beer and your body can’t handle one more ounce of triple IPA or Calvadosbarrel-aged imperial stout, then it’s time to check out one of Portland’s many great wine or cocktail bars. Near the convention center, you can hit great urban wineries, cocktail bars and a cidery. Coopers Hall (404 SE 6th Ave., 719-7000, coopershall.com) is like a beer hall for wine drinkers. The hangar-sized building features 30 wines on tap, including those from Coopers Hall and local guest wineries. You can fill growlers of wine to go, and there’s a respectable food menu. Rum Club (720 SE Sandy Blvd., 265-8807, rumclubpdx. com) is one of Portland’s hottest cocktail joints— low-key and unpretentious but world-class. Reverend Nat’s Hard Cider (1813 NE 2nd Ave., 567-2221, revnats.com) is among the best cideries in the nation’s most hardcore cider market, and it has an inviting tasting room only about a 20-minute walk from the convention center.
libertyglassbar.com
KENNETH HUEY
MAN BAGS In addition to all that free swag you’ll be picking up, you’ll want to carry a phone charger or backup battery in case you get lost. Since it’s Portland, you’ll also want to have a rain jacket and not an umbrella.
OPEN TILL 2:30AM DAILY
EAT SOMETHING Portland has a decent amount of food joints for your late-night munchies. It’s better to eat at 3 am than to wake up with a brutal hangover, so mark these spots on your Google map. Original Hotcake House (1002 SE Powell Blvd., 236-7402, hotcakehouse.com) is Portland’s most famous 24-hour diner. Late-night favorites include anything with hash browns, or a pile of biscuits and gravy. Montage (301 SE Morrison St., 234-1324, montageportland.com) is the closest late-night diner to the convention center and serves Cajun fare such as jambalaya, fried chicken, alligator and oysters until at least 3 am on Fridays and Saturdays. Doug Fir Lounge (830 E Burnside St., 231-9663, dougfirlounge.com) is best known for its subterranean music venue, but the bar and restaurant upstairs is close to the convention center and open until 2:30 am. The menu is American gastropub, with sandwiches, grilled fish and chicken to accompany a decent beer and cocktail list. Up late on either side of the river? Get a slice at Sizzle Pie (926 W Burnside St., 624 E Burnside St.; 234-7437; sizzlepie.com), a punk-rock pizza shop with vegan options that’s open until 4 am on weekends and 3 am on weeknights. Luc Lac (835 SW 2nd Ave., 222-0047, luclackitchen.com) is terrific for Vietnamese food if you find yourself downtown after the bars close. Order a rice or noodle bowl and wash it down with a strong Vietnamese coffee. It’s open until 4 am on Friday and Saturday.
Tickets On Sale Now!
NAKED WOMEN When you’ve had your fill of sweaty men, seek out the fairer sex at a variety of convenient and affordable Portland strip clubs (see page 43). Sassy’s is close to Cascade, Green Dragon and the Commons. Mary’s Club is downtown next to Bailey’s Taproom, and Union Jacks is right by Burnside Brewing and Doug Fir Lounge. None of the clubs have a cover, but all have liquor and fully nude dancers. Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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MUSIC
GET ON THE TRAIN THE HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS YEAR’S SOUL’D OUT MUSIC FESTIVAL. Robert Glasper Experiment
Exhibit A in the case for jazz’s survival, pianist Robert Glasper’s fluid combinations of jazz, R&B and hip-hop sound as organically related as these not-sodistant cousins should be, rather than a contrived attempt to update an allegedly archaic art form—see his contributions to Kendrick Lamar’s To Pimp a Butterfly. BRETT CAMPBELL. Dante’s. 7 pm Wednesday, April 15. $25. 21+.
Goapele
A favorite of the early 2000s neo-soul underground, Goapele has spent the past decade dropping a string of emotionally stirring, jazz- and electronica-flecked albums,
the latest of which is titled Strong as Glass. MATTHEW SINGER. Star Theater. 9 pm Wednesday, April 15. $20. 21+.
Lyrics Born and Black Milk
Before befriending Jay Z (and, um, Insane Clown Posse), the first rapper the formerly anti-hip-hop Jack White ever deigned to collaborate with was Detroit’s Curtis Cross, aka Black Milk, co-producing a oneoff single for Third Man Records. Northern California’s Lyrics Born, meanwhile, has never received such a magnanimous cosign, but he’s a respected underground vet and half of one the more underrated duos in the game, Latyrx. MS. Alhambra Theater. 9 pm Thursday, April 16. $17 advance, $22 day of show. 21+.
Gramatik
Try as he might to borrow concepts from disco or acid house, Denis Jasarevic, aka Gramatik, can’t stray too far from the breakbeat. The jazzy melodies and glossy production on 2015’s free Coffee Shop Selection, a chill compilation of beats from his earlier Street Bangerz series, are out of date but not entirely out of style in the Yeezus era. MITCH LILLIE. Roseland Theater. 8 pm Thursday, April 16. $15 advance, $20 day of show. 18+.
NPP All-Star Quartet
This show, featuring some of the most respected names in jazz circles—Bobby Watson, Marvin “Smitty” Smith, Donald Brown, Ray Drummond—inaugurates the PDX Jazz organization’s welcome move of its offices to the new creative space and center for nonprofits serving the Northeast in the heart of Portland’s historic jazz scene, an area that was called “Jumptown” half a century ago. BC. Alberta Abbey. 7:30 pm Friday, April 17. $15-$30. 21+.
Yasiin Bey + Bad Brains
In addition to doing a set of his own music, the rapper-actor formerly known as Mos Def will also front the legendary D.C. hardcore band for the first time anywhere. Punk purists might balk, given that original Bad Brains singer H.R. is one of the best to ever do it, and Bey has yet to prove he’s got the vocal elasticity to pull off their thrashier material. But if you’ve seen the Brains in recent years, then you know the group could use an injection of fresh blood, and he’s as good a donor as anyone. MS. Roseland Theater. 9 pm Friday, April 17. $32.50-$45. 21+.
Kiesza
It’s getting increasingly hard to keep all these dance-pop ingénues straight. Kiesza
is the one who sort of resembles Simply Red’s Mick Hucknall on her album cover and whose 2014 hit, the Euro-housing “Hideaway,” is the best song to never appear on a Club MTV mix from the early ’90s. MS. Hawthorne Theatre. 7 pm Sunday, April 19. $25. All ages.
Allen Stone
The pride of Chewelah, Wash., Allen Stone is the Macklemore of retro-R&B: a wellmeaning interloper who, try as he might, just can’t shake the image that he’s faking the funk. But the dude can sing, and will probably sell a lot of records anyway. MS. Roseland Theater. 8 pm Sunday, April 19. $22. All ages.
Don Carlos and Vieux Farka Touré
Well, yeah, you’ve got to have the reggae guy on 4/20, right? Don Carlos is a legend from his time in Black Uhuru, one of the great Jamaican vocal groups of all time, and Vieux Farka Touré is the son of one, the late Malian guitarist Ali Farka Touré. But through four studio albums updating his father’s desert-blues style, he’s gradually building a legacy all his own. MS. Wonder Ballroom. 8 pm Monday, April 20. $22. 21+. MORE: See the full Soul’d Out Music Festival lineup at souldoutfestival.com. Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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april 15–21
MUSIC
= WW Pick. Highly recommended. Prices listed are sometimes for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply. Event lineups are subject to change after WW’s press deadlines. Editor: MATTHEW SINGER. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, go to wweek.com/submitevents and follow submission directions. All shows should be submitted two weeks or more in advance of event. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: msinger@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.
WEDNESDAY, APRIL 15 Electric Wizard, Satan’s Satyrs
[DOOM METAL] It’s been 13 long, smoldering years since British doom icon Electric Wizard graced a Portland stage with its brimstone biker take on slow-motion acid metal. But the highs have gotten continually higher as the years have gone on. The Wizard has become a cover star of metal magazines worldwide and a darling of the festival circuit. The domestic audience is now primed for an agonizingly awaited U.S. return, hot on the heels of 2014’s Time to Die, a comforting slab of bleak, stonedout beanbag chair metal. NATHAN CARSON. Hawthorne Theatre, 1507 SE Cesar E. Chavez Blvd., 233-7100. 8 pm. Sold out. All ages.
What So Not
[PARTY OF ONE] After two summers dominating festival DJ sets, Australian dance duo What So Not broke up this spring— sort of. Formerly featuring Harley Streten, a powerhouse on his own as Flume, What So Not is now the solo project of Chris Emerson, and signed to Skrillex’s Owsla label. Given corporate dance music’s unsettling savvy for marketing and branding, the change is likely a face-saving move, while also being a good opportunity for Emerson to ditch his dreadful solo moniker, Emoh Instead. Here’s hoping the shakeup brings more epic tracks like 2013’s “Touched” to What So Not’s forthcoming Gemini EP. MITCH LILLIE. The Whiskey Bar, 31 NW 1st Ave., 227-0405. 10 pm. $25. 21+.
THURSDAY, APRIL 16 Mason Jennings, Lucette
[SOLITARY SONGWRITER ] It’s unfortunate Mason Jennings often gets thrown in the same ring as Jack Johnson. It’s not surprising, given the former labelmates still pal around, but Jennings has always shown an aptitude for minimalist folk and keen wordplay that Johnson never has. His voice and music have become more textured in recent years—see his coy 2013 release Always Been for evidence—though his lyrics still retain a profuse amount of political and spiritual commentary despite the additional adornment of dense string arrangements and light percussion. BRANDON WIDDER. Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St., 719-6055. 8 pm. $28 advance, $32 day of show, $40 preferred seating. All ages.
Once and Future Band, Motrik, Hands In
[LOUD PSYCHEDELIA] Last year’s Brain EP, from Oakland’s Once and Future Band, opens with 30 seconds of wobbly keys and noodling guitar that, taken together, sound almost exactly like the intro to Aerosmith’s “Dream On.” Luckily, what follows for the next 25 minutes is nostalgic in less direct fashion, and executed beautifully. Once and Future Band plays proggy, psychedelic funk jams wrapped in both flowing paisley and torn black denim. The lyrics are as impenetrable as OFAB’s druggiest ’60s and ’70s influences, but frontman Danny James doesn’t ham up or filter his vocals to sound like any one particular decade or played-out genre, and that goes
a long way toward keeping Brain feeling thoroughly unironic. CASEY JARMAN. Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water Ave., 894-9708. 10 pm. $8 advance, $10 day of show. 21+.
Lord Huron, Leon Bridges
[SOARING INDIE FOLK] On its second LP, Strange Trails, Lord Huron exhibits the same roaming, take-to-the-trails, I-would-climbmountains-and-fight-bears-for-her attitude—only with a little more apocalyptic doom thrown in. See single “The World Ender,” a song built on a dark, surf-flecked riff and wobbly keyboard line, detailing a man’s revenge from beyond the grave, with hardly a speck of twangy trail dust or romantic longing to be found. Leon Bridges, a 25-year-old gospel-soul singer who turned heads at this year’s SXSW with his throwback doo-wop style, opens the show. KAITIE TODD. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 225-0047. 9 pm. $20 advance, $22 day of show. All ages.
The Delines, Scott McCaughey
[STORYTELLING COUNTRY] The Delines are a throwback—in both form and function—to the days when reducing listeners to tears seemed like country music’s sole intent. Most of the songs on the band’s 2014 debut, Colfax, seem written for impromptu last-call slow dances at those fast-disappearing dives still fueled by Wurlitzer jukes. Willy Vlautin’s achingly direct story-songs have always stood out against the dipshit cliché-montage that populates the country music and alt-country landscape, but when Amy Boone steps into Willy’s shoes, it’s an atmospheric combination of smart and heartfelt that’s rare in any genre. CASEY JARMAN. Kelly’s Olympian, 426 SW Washington St, 228-3669. 9 pm. $8 advance, $10 day of show. 21+.
FRIDAY, APRIL 17 Faith No More
[“EPIC” COMEBACK] Mike Patton is a master of making unpredictable moves, so it makes perfect sense that he’d take the most obvious step of all by bringing back his most commercially successful act. More surprising has been Faith No More’s decision to make a new album. The band dropped a first single called “Motherfucker,” which recalls “Pepper” by the Butthole Surfers, but isn’t quite as clever, catchy or radio-friendly. Regardless, fans bought out tickets to this tour in a matter of minutes, proving that ’90s worship is in full effect, and that Faith No More created a legacy one hopes will lead to an eventual reunion of Patton’s best project, Mr. Bungle. NATHAN CARSON. Keller Auditorium, 222 SW Clay St., 800-745-3000. 8 pm. Sold out. All ages.
Fred and Toody Cole Unplugged, Jenny Don’t & the Spurs, Flash Flood and the Dikes
[STRIPPED DOWN PUNK] This is going to sound morbid, but there was a moment last year when I considered blocking out time to write Fred Cole’s obituary. When I interviewed the 66-year-old Portland punk legend before Dead Moon’s first reunion show in early 2014, he alluded to undisclosed health issues. A few months later, it was announced
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he would undergo heart bypass surgery. I thought I might have to prepare for the worst. I hesitated, though, because there’s always been a sense he’d outlive us all. Thankfully, my instincts were correct, and the surgery was a success. Still, the whole ordeal was a lesson in appreciating what we have while we’ve still got it, and these rare, career-spanning acoustic performances help put the weighty legeacy of Cole and his wife and bandmate, Toody, in its proper perspective. MATTHEW SINGER. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 9 pm. $10 advance, $12 day of show. 21+.
Neko Case
[CHANTEUSE OF COOL] Neko Case has the best voice of her generation, the most swagger and an effortless command of her incredibly likable stage persona. The miracle is that she’s done all this by crafting an idealized form of country rock that should have always existed, but never quite did until she came along. By the early ’00s, her albums were being sold in Starbucks, and it’s hard to fault her for reaching out to everyone who loves melody, has experienced heartbreak and who can see through the mile-thick wall of bullshit that is the country music industry. Alialujah Choir opens Friday, with Rodrigo Amarante supporting on Saturday. NATHAN CARSON. Revolution Hall, 1300 SE Stark St., Suite 110, 288-3895. 8 pm. Both shows sold out.
SATURDAY, APRIL 18 Joseph, Caleb Groh
[SHARED HERITAGE] Contrary to what the name suggests, the band Joseph is actually made up of three women—the three Closner sisters, in fact, who named the group after both their grandfather and the Eastern Oregon town they used to visit as kids. Their songs evoke the damp, forested landscape the members grew up around, but the sound isn’t exactly dreamy. On debut album Native Dreamer Kin, powerful, twangy harmonies give the soft acoustic guitars an uplifting kick. SHANNON GORMLEY. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 2319663. 9 pm. $10. 21+.
SUNDAY, APRIL 19 Defeater, Counterparts, Hotel Books, Better Off
[BROKEN-HEARTED HARDCORE] The ambitious concept album about domestic unrest is nothing new within the hardcore genre, but you’d be hard pressed to find one that channels the angst and aggression of a pissed-off teenager in a broken home better than Defeater’s excellent 2013 offering, Letters Home. The record walks a razor wire between math-y outbursts and shout-along passages that have come to define Warped Tour’s recent sensibilities. But there’s more than eyeliner and skintight jeans to Defeater’s presence in the hardcore community. These dudes are sad,
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COURTESY OF NONESUCH RECORDS
PREVIEW
Philip Selway, Adem [EVERY BEAT IN ITS RIGHT PLACE] Drummer Philip Selway might be the least well-known member of Radiohead. For years, glossy features by the likes of Spin and Rolling Stone lauded the band’s democratic work ethos, highlighting Colin Greenwood’s smooth, hypnotic basslines or auxiliary guitarist Ed O’Brien’s washed-out arpeggios and lilting backup vocals while barely mentioning the contributions of one of rock’s best timekeepers. But listen to Radiohead’s material, especially everything since 2000’s experimental opus Kid A, and you’ll find that it’s often the drums—rhythmic, inventive, often slightly off-kilter—that hold tracks like majestic ballad “Pyramid Song” together. Selway is also an underrated songwriter, and his second solo album, last year’s Weatherhouse, abandons the more acoustic-leaning songs of his debut for a sound closer to Radiohead-lite. For one thing, he’s again drumming here: The jazzy, choppy beat on “Miles Away” gives the song a murky underpinning, and the percussion on “Around Again” is straight out of the “How to Disappear Completely” playbook. Selway will probably never be a star, but Weatherhouse—more than Thom Yorke’s latest bloopy solo excursion or Jonny Greenwood’s orchestral scores—fits perfectly into Radiohead’s wheelhouse. Sometimes comfort food is all you want, even in ¾ time. MICHAEL MANNHEIMER. The Old Church, 1422 SW 11th Ave., 222-2031. 9 pm Thursday, April 16. $20. All ages. 52
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Upcoming In-Stores HIP HATCHET Wednesday, April 15 th at 6 PM
A musical jack-of-all-trades, Hip Hatchet pulls from his variety of musical experiences, including jazz piano, bluegrass, country, chamber music, and the American singer-songwriter tradition, to create a dynamic, original, candid sound in his quest to tell the story of every person he meets.
DAWES
Saturday, April 18 th at 6 PM Led by brothers Taylor and Griffin Goldsmith, Dawes broke through to radio success two years ago on the strength of their 2013 album Stories Don’t End. Now, the lyrically-minded folk rock band has announced a follow-up entitled All Your Favorite Bands. Free silk screened poster when you pre-buy the new Dawes album, ‘All Your Favorite Bands’, out June 2nd.
DEAD MOON Saturday, April 18 th at 8 PM
Portland’s Dead Moon is truly one of the most independent and revered Northwest underground bands of all time. With Fred Cole on guitar and vocals, his wife Toody on bass and vocals, and the indefatigable Andrew Loomis on drums, Dead Moon have been churning out their own indescribable brand of rock and roll for nearly 20 years now.
KRISTIN ANDREASSEN Tuesday, April 21 at 6 st
PM
‘Gondolier’ finds songwriter Kristin Andreassen juxtaposing deep traditional roots with modern Brooklyn indie influences. Featuring guests from the exploding New York folk scene, but written largely on a remote island in New Hampshire, the lyrically and instrumentally rich arrangements on Andreassen’s first studio album explore secret passageways connecting the outer edges of disparate notions – urban and rural, childhood and old age, expectation and reality.
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Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
sunday–monday pissed and not the least bit shy about letting you know it. What’s more hardcore than that? PETE COTTELL. Alhambra Theatre, 4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 610-0640. 6:30 pm. $13 advance, $15 day of show. All ages.
MONDAY, APRIL 20 Richie Ramone, Dime Runner, Sex Crime, 48 Thrills
Portland Post-Rock Festival: Entendre Entendre, Amos Val, Coastlands, A Collective Subconscious, Long Hallways
[ENDLESS CRESCENDOS] For a genre predicated (mostly) on a lack of vocals, the online shitstorm that ensues every time an emerging post-rock project is compared to Explosions in the Sky is quite comical in contrast. It’s true that the Austin crescendo kings cast a long shadow, but the diversity to be found in burgeoning local scenes will impress even those who happen upon it by accident. Whether you’re attuned to moody introspection or caterwauling dynamic shifts that will beanie right off your head— with Long Hallways and Amos Val being can’t-miss examples of both genre standards, respectively— you’ll leave this showcase with a substantiated notion that there’s more to hang your heart on within the genre than endless reverb trails and predictably triumphant buildups. PETE COTTELL. Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison St., 239-7639. 7 pm. $5 advance, $7 day of show. 21+.
The Von Trapps, Big Haunt
[DROP OF GOLDEN SUN] Although anyone unaware of The Sound Of Music’s factual origins might assume the von Trapps’ backstory rather like a soul singer claiming Porgy and Bess as parents, didn’t we always assume the grandchildren of youngest-boy-character Kurt von Trapp would someday move to Portland and start a band? The first of three EPs planned around different producers (Blind Pilot’s Israel Nebeker leads off) over the next year, newly-released debut Dancing In Gold evades both kitsch singalongs and the whimsical flourishes of recent Pink Martini collaborations for burnished, backwardsleaning indie-pop alive with the music of Pet Sounds—and, perhaps, a spoonful of “Sugar, Sugar.” JAY HORTON. Revolution Hall, 1300 SE Stark St. #110, 288-3895. 8 pm. $18 advance, $20 day of show. Under 21 permitted with legal guardian.
Dead Milkmen, Lié
[MIDWEST RANCOR] Since their 16-year hiatus ended in 2011, the Dead Milkmen have issued a pair of records, The King of Yellow and 2014’s Pretty Music for Pretty Special People, each exhibiting a skewed take on independent rock dating back to the band’s inception. A weird ska rhythm might crop up, just before some synth guides a simple rock track to its climax. Of course, the Milkmen’s legacy still hangs on quickstep compositions like “Punk Rock Girl.” And as kitschy as that song is, other efforts on its earliest releases are sharp enough, lyrically and musically, to be slotted alongside any K or SST release. DAVE CANTOR. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., 2848686. 9 pm. Sold out. 21+.
COURTESY OF SHANE WRIGHT
[FOLK POP] Portland needs another acoustic balladeer about as badly as it needs more $7 ice-cream cones or community acupuncture clinics, but we landed a good one when Chris Pureka moved here in 2012. While the Northampton, Mass., native’s early material felt a touch impatient and coffee-shop cute, somewhere over the course of her dozen-plus years on the road, she developed a darker songwriting style and a sweetly road-weary delivery. Last year’s Chimera II EP managed to be both vulnerable (see “Old Photographs”) and playful (her cover of the Stones’ “Play With Fire”). A new full-band album, which Pureka says will be darker and more intense, is in the works. CASEY JARMAN. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 231-9663. 8 pm. $13 advance, $15 day of show. 21+.
Damien Rice, Marketa Irglova
[POP PUNK] Richie is probably the last Ramone in line when the world ranks those who kept the beat behind the more recognizable mugs of Joey, Dee Dee and Johnny (even Marky had a tenure in the Heartbreakers to up his cool points). But if we’re talking strictly chops, Richie would easily top the list of musicians ever to adopt the surname. His 2013 solo endeavor, Entitled, has the faux-Anglo affectation that any early Jawbreaker fan would recognize, and an abundance of hooks and instrumental noodling to power even the most extreme of midlife crises. CRIS LANKENAU. Hawthorne Theatre, 1507 SE Cesar E. Chavez Blvd., 233-7100. 7 pm. 7 pm. 21+.
Chris Pureka, Sera Cahoone
MUSIC
[FOLK] Ireland’s favorite fragile prince, Damien Rice, is currently touring material from My Favourite Faded Fantasy, his third album and first release in almost a decade. Rice’s latest alternates between hushed, minimal folk and lush orchestral ballads. While writing and recording these songs, Rice claims to have been drawn to producer Rick Rubin as someone he could feel vulnerable with. Thank God for that: Anyone familiar with Rice’s penchant for wrenching hearts knows vulnerability is absolutely essential to his sound. You will be sad, and you will like it. KAITIE TODD. Keller Auditorium, 222 SW Clay St., 800-745-3000. 8 pm. $48.25-$80.10. All ages.
CONT. on page 57
INTRODUCING B.S. WRIGHT Who: Shane Wright (production, vocals). Sounds like: Someone bought those murderous demon children from David Cronenberg’s The Brood a bunch of synthesizers and loop pedals and introduced them to the concept of “power electronics.” For fans of: Suicide, Throbbing Gristle, Tim Hecker, Foetus.
After putting his newborn child to bed, Shane Wright likes to sneak off to his basement and create nightmares. Under the more formal nom de plume B.S. Wright—his given first name is Brandon—the 32-year-old musician makes scraping, convulsing, groaning industrial night terrors inspired mostly by the evils that men do. In person, though, Wright is hardly a prince of darkness; he’s just a soft-spoken dude with glasses. And if you ask him, his music isn’t so pitch-black that no sliver of hope can penetrate. “I’ve always had this love-hate relationship with humanity,” says Wright, who grew up in Dallas, Texas. He moved to Portland in part because of his childhood admiration for the indigenous tribes of the Pacific Northwest, which, to him, represented a utopian ideal. It’s indicative of his artistic perspective, which is less an expression of nihilistic despair than profound disappointment. “I look at the world and I’m just like, ‘Why can’t it be better?’” Not long after settling in Portland a decade ago, Wright started Blood Beach, a psych-rock band that, while not exactly straightforward, never stretched out as far as he would’ve preferred. With that group winding down—its final show is April 26 at Beacon Sound—Wright’s focus has turned to the dark electronic abstractions he tinkered with in his off-time. Decorum, his new cassette, is his first time sharing those private experiments with the public. It’s a creeping, disquieting assemblage of loops, samples and buzzing, screeching synths, often with just enough of a pulse to give the songs form. Wright’s voice, which rarely rises above a murmur, is treated and distorted until it forms an almost vaporous presence—like a specter haunting his own album. Much of Decorum was recorded at home during whatever downtime Wright managed to find while raising his 14-month-old son. Having a child wasn’t always something he wanted, but he’s come to see parenthood in the same way as his music: as protection against the void. “For the longest time, I was like, ‘I’m never going to bring a kid into this world,’” he says. “But as I thought about it, I was like, ‘What other alternative is there to this world?’ I think it’s just helpful. In a way, if good people were having good children, things would get better.” MATTHEW SINGER. SEE IT: B.S. Wright plays the Foggy Notion, 3416 N Lombard St., with Teeth Engraved With the Names of the Dead, Tony Remple and Bob Desaulniers, on Friday, April 17. 8 pm. $5.
Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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RECORD STORE DAY
AT MUSIC MILLENNIUM SATURDAY, ApRIL 18Th
• Opening at 8AM • Free coffee & Muffins 7AM • Free gift bags while they last • Vinyl deals throughout the store
500
over special limited Live performances edition vinyl 6pm Dawes | 8pm Dead moon releases Complimentary beverages provided by New Belgium during performance!
MAGMA
RSD SPECIALS
Slag Tanz Sale Priced CD $12.99 Powerful, hypnotic, unclassifiable, incomparable. MAGMA are in a class of their own. ..The dynamite that will explode the conventions of a music scene that is becoming rather too self-satisfied with its own beauty. Magma are unlike anything that has gone before...” So people were saying in 1970. In 2015, nearly half a century later, this is truer than ever, and the new mini-album Slag Tanz, this veritable symphony of jazz metal that has erupted from nowhere, radiates with all Magma’s singular intensity!
JEFF THE BROTHERHOOD Wasted On The Dream Sale Priced CD $10.99
Wasted On The Dream is the record the Orrall brothers have been building up to since they first formed JEFF The Brotherhood in 2001. It’s a van-rocking, bong-rattling slab that authentically captures their fiery mixture of 70s hard rock, 80s punk, 90’s grunge and indelible pop melodies.
THE STAVES If I Was Sale Priced CD $10.99
The Staves, originally from Watford, England, are three sisters: Emily (vocals), Jessica (vocals, guitar), and Camilla (vocals, ukulele) Staveley-Taylor. In their new songs, The Staves examine their seemingly endless touring by imagining what they have left behind rather than writing about endless highways, hotel rooms, and what they see in front of them.
BUENA VISTA SOCIAL CLUB Lost & Found Sale Priced CD $14.99
Coming almost two decades after the release of the original Grammy-winning, self-titled LP, the new album is a collection of previously unreleased tracks, some of which were recorded during the original album’s sessions in Havana while others are live recordings from the world tours of Buena Vista’s legendary veterans.
ALLISON Down MOORER To Believing
ACTION BRONSON Mr. Wonderful
Allison Moorer’s newest album is being hailed as her best body of work, despite her previously earned nominations for an Academy Award for Best Song and a Grammy. The album features Moorer’s warm, distinctive vocals on 12 selfwritten, genre-crossing tracks that explore a wide range of topics, drawn from her own true life experiences, both positive and negative.
He may sound like Wu-Tang Clan’s Ghostface Killah, but when rapper Action Bronson calls upon his past life as a chef and spits heavy culinary knowledge in his songs, you certainly won’t confuse the two. After slipping in a restaurant kitchen and breaking his leg, Action was out of work, and decided to become a rapper. His mixtapes gained him popularity on the web and his performances intrigued the masses landing him a major label deal.
Sale Priced CD $10.99
PRIORY
Need To Know Sale Priced CD $10.99 Written in a studio built from the ground up in a former cement factory, the resulting output is a unique and powerful collection of neon-lit new wave pop cut with modern rock aesthetics, led by the ebullient and catchy single, “Weekend.” It’s the sound of a band emerging triumphantly from the trials of their past and looking fearlessly into the future.
Sale Priced CD $10.99
DEATH CAB FOR CUTIE
Kintsugi Sale Priced CD $14.99 Death Cab for Cutie’s first new album since the departure last year of founding guitarist/ keyboardist/producer Chris Walla. The album takes its title from the Japanese art of repairing broken ceramics with precious metals like gold, silver, and platinum, highlighting cracks rather than hiding them. As such, kintsugi represents a compassionate aesthetic philosophy in which damage and wear are embraced as part of an objects history.
All Prices Valid 4/15-5/13
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Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
tuesday/classical, etc.
TUESDAY, APRIL 21 Upset, Colleen Green
[POWER POP GOES TO COLLEGE] How’s this for a perfect bill: California songwriter Colleen Green opening for power-pop lifers Upset, featuring ex-Hole drummer Patty Schemel and singer Ali Koehler, who’s played with Vivian Girls and Best Coast? Sometimes you’re just too good for words, rock gods. Green’s direct, just-smoked-a-joint-and-sat-downwith-my-guitar jams sound like the Ramones if they recorded for Burger Records. Upset is also touring behind new material: The 21-minute ’76 EP is the type of kill-your-idols power pop that makes you want to start a band, or at least raise your drink and shout for an encore. MICHAEL MANNHEIMER. Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water Ave., 894-9708. 9:30 pm. $10 advance, $12 day of show. 21+.
CLASSICAL, JAZZ & WORLD Martinů Quartet
[CZECH-PDX CLASSICAL] Now entering its 40th season, the Martinů Quartet is one of the leading interpreters of the great classical chamber music of its Czech homeland. Now it’s embarking on a complete survey of the string quartets of an American composer, Portland’s own Tomas Svoboda. Svoboda grew up in Czechoslovakia and his music often packs the kind of punch usually found in rock. Along with three of his quartets, the Martinůs will perform 19th- and 20th-century music by the Fab Four of Czech classical composers: Dvorak, Smetana, Janacek and, of course, their namesake. BRETT CAMPBELL. Lincoln Hall, Portland State University, 1620 SW Park Ave., 725-3307. 7:30 pm Thursday-Friday, April 16-17. $5 student rush and Arts for All tickets, $35–$40 general admission. Half-price advance student tickets. 21+.
Third Angle New Music
[MULTIMEDIA SONG CYCLE] Jacob Cooper is part of a generation of younger composers for whom useless categories like “classical” and “pop” no longer limit creative expression. For his acclaimed 2014 song cycle, Silver Threads, which Cooper and Brooklyn new music soprano Melissa Cooper will perform with Portland’s own Third Angle musicians, you can add “ambient” and “electronica” to the mix. Cooper set a famous haiku by that name to music, then asked five young writers to create reactions to it, and set those verses to glitch-influenced electronic and chamber music to create a drifting sonic dreamscape. BRETT CAMPBELL. Zoomtopia, 810 SE Belmont St., zoomtopia.com. 7:30 pm Thursday-Friday, April 16-17. $10 students, $20 seniors, $25 general admission. All ages.
Joined Voices
[SCHOOL OF ROCK CHOIR] In various ways, Portland singer-songwriter Alan Singley and former MarchFourth Marching Band trombonist Ethan Chessin have been working to break down barriers between indiepop and classical music. Now they’re joining forces to bring together three nationally acclaimed Portland musical phenomena: songwriters-composers, rock musicians, and youth choir—specifically, the 150-voice choir at Camas High School, where Chessin now teaches music. Along with Singley and Sama Dams singer Lisa Adams, they’ll perform Singley’s settings of Gary Snyder poems, a choral arrangement of a song by Point Juncture, WA, and an original work, plus music by Prague-based Felix Obelix composer Wendy Spitzer and Mexicobased composer Aldo Rohlfs. BRETT CAMPBELL.. First Congregational Church, 1126 SW Park Ave. 7 pm Saturday, April 18. $5 students and seniors, $10 general admission. All ages.
For more Music listings, visit
MUSIC
ALBUM REVIEWS: RECORD STORE DAY EDITION
NO. 2 NO MEMORY (JACKPOT) [LOST PORTLAND ROCK] At some point, Elliott Smith fans burn through his all-toofinite discography and wind up at Heatmiser’s last album, Mic City Sons. What that record makes clear is that, despite Smith’s later deification, he and Heatmiser bandmate Neil Gust left equal impressions on one another. No Memory, the 1999 debut from Gust’s post-Heatmiser project, No. 2, is even more fascinating in that, despite Smith’s relative absence, slabs of it could be sold on the indie-rock black market as B-sides from XO. “Move It Along” is a Smithian waltz, seasick and punctuated by Beatles-style drum fills. But even more explosive songs like “Pop in C” and the punky “Nobody’s Satisfied” share a striking resemblance. Gust’s lyrics, his melodic nods to power-pop and Brit-pop idols, and especially that voice, all feel hauntingly close to Smith’s work of the same era (Smith mixed the record and does some backing vocals), begging questions of just what each musician learned from the other. Regardless, No Memory is a fantastic record that has aged beautifully, tangled up as it may be in Smith’s mythology. Sixteen years later, neither songwriter is releasing new music. We lost Smith to depression, and Gust to an ad firm. Here’s hoping the latter gets back in the studio. CASEY JARMAN.
HUTCH AND KATHY HUTCH AND KATHY (JEALOUS BUTCHER) [PRE-PUNK] In an attic somewhere, there’s a cache of photos of me in high school, all zitty and blue-haired, playing Hacky Sack in saggy JNCO jeans. Hutch Harris and Kathy Foster were a few years out of their teens when their Hutch and Kathy album first found daylight in 2000, but I bet listening back on it is, at times, a similarly cringe-inducing experience. It’s a document of the duo’s learning curve, and the songs tend to get overly repetitive or uncomfortably twee—and Harris is still shaking a cartoonish SoCal accent. Still, there’s something startlingly original about these quaint home recordings that hints at the Thermals’ lo-fi masterpieces to come: tight, minimal song structures; chemistry oozing through the duo’s vocal harmonies; lyricism mixing the darkly comic and the sweet. “On the Way to Work” is a terribly infectious diddy about the mundanity of the work week. “An Infinite Loop” is a ramshackle road-trip jam, and you can hear the sound of the room in the guitar solo. Hell, you can hear the room everywhere on Hutch and Kathy—the room, the camaraderie, the sense of discovery, and the future of Portland music in the midst of an awkward growth spurt. CASEY JARMAN.
DEAD MOON LIVE AT SATYRICON (VOODOO DOUGHNUT RECORDINGS) [GHOST OF PUNK PAST] In 1993, the year of this live recording issued for the first time by Voodoo Doughnut’s boutique record label, the grandparents of Portland punk would’ve been a spry 44 years old. But age ain’t never been nothing but a number for Fred and Toody Cole, and a Dead Moon show is going to sound the same whether it’s from the ’80s, the ’90s or 30 years from now. So it’s hard to appraise the significance of this record as a historical document. But it doesn’t take an antiques dealer to tell you that it fucking rocks. The renditions of “Dead Moon Night” and the old blues chestnut “Parchman Farm” are particularly vicious, with Fred Cole braying like Robert Plant being raked over hot coals. His harmonizing with Toody often makes John Doe and Exene Cervenka sound like Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell, but there are few voices better suited for shouting together—see the chorus of the Toody-led “Johnny’s Got a Gun,” the album’s blistering highlight. Dead Moon was never “tight” musically, but it got by on ragged chemistry, which bleeds through the speakers for the entire set. That won’t surprise fans, of course, but having a small artifact to reinforce it is certainly welcome. MATTHEW SINGER. GET IT: All three albums will be available at participating Record Store Day stores on Saturday, April 18. Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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CALLING ALL MUSICIANS! Amateur, professional and everyone in between. Join in the music celebration that will rock more than 700 cities around the world on June 21. From Alternative to Bluegrass to Classical to Zydeco, Make Music PDX is a celebration of music of all genres played by and enjoyed by people of all stripes. Music by the People, For the People.
ALL DAY, ALL FREE! Sign up to perform at www.makemusicdaypdx.org MEDIA SPONSOR 58
Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
MUSIC CALENDAR
[APRIL 15-21] Alberta Abbey
= WW pick. Highly recommended. Editor: Mitch Lillie. TO HAVE YOUR EVENT LISTED, send show information at least two weeks in advance on the web at wweek.com/submitevents. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: music@wweek.com.
126 NE Alberta Street Soul’d Out Music Festival: NPP All-Star Quartet
Alberta rose Theatre
For more listings, check out wweek.com.
3000 NE Alberta St. Alex de Grassi and Andrew York
LAST WEEK LIVE
Alhambra Theatre
COLIN MCLAUgHLIN
4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Protospheric Domicile Consortium, ATE21, Seth Lion, DMONI
Twilight Cafe and Bar
Firkin Tavern
Jimmy Mak’s
303 SW 12th Ave. Redwood Son
Alhambra Theatre
4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Q Dot
dante’s
350 W Burnside St Robert Glasper Experiment
duff’s Garage
2530 NE 82nd Ave 24th Street Wailer, Arthur Moore’s Harmonica Party
edgefield-Troutdale 2126 SW Halsey St. Henry Hill Kammerer
Firkin Tavern
1937 SE 11th Ave. Firkin Full of Eye Candy
Hawthorne Theatre
1507 SE Cesar E. Chavez Blvd Electric Wizard, Satan’s Satyrs
Jimmy Mak’s
221 NW 10th Ave. The Christopher Brown Quartet, Mel Brown Quartet
Moda Center
1 N Center Court St. Garth Brooks
The Know
2026 NE Alberta St. MonsterCreature, Yesterdays Pantz
The liquor Store
3341 SE Belmont St. Yeah Great Fine, Mothertapes & Glass Knees
The Tonic lounge
3100 NE Sandy Blvd. Lubec, Vincent Van Whoa, Surf Stoned and The Sun Drunks
Turn! Turn! Turn!
8 NE Killingsworth St. Sister Mamie Foreskin & Control Machete, CMG Outset Series
White eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Reverb Brothers
THurS. April 16 Al’s den
Brunish Theatre
1111 SW Broadway Greil Marcus
Bunk Bar
1028 SE Water Ave. Once and Future Band
Crystal Ballroom
1332 W Burnside Street Lord Huron, Leon Bridges
3939 N Mississippi Ave. Joe McMurrian, Lewi Longmire, Mary Flower
Moda Center
1 N Center Court St. Garth Brooks
222 SW Clay St. Faith No More
lincoln performance Hall 1620 SW Park Ave. Mozart’s Le Nozze Di Figaro
Mississippi Studios
3939 N Mississippi Ave. Fred & Toody Cole, Jenny Don’t & The Spurs, Flash Flood & The Dikes
Mothership Music
3611 NE MLK Tigerface, Matt Boney Band
SW Salmon Street And SW Naito KPSU Kruise: Wild Ones, Purse Candy,, & Break Mode
portland State university
1825 SW Broadway Celebrate Svoboda
The Bitter end
1300 SE Stark St, #110 Neko Case
The Know
8 NW 6th Ave. Yasiin Bey (aka Mos Def) and Bad Brains
The Secret Society
The Know
Jimmy Mak’s
Alberta rose Theatre
Kells Brewpub
Kelly’s Olympian
426 SW Washington St. The Delines
White eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Haley Johnson
Fri. April 17 Al’s den
303 SW 12th Ave. Redwood Son
1037 SW Broadway Death on the Downbeat
Branx
320 SE 2nd Ave. Boombox, Mikey Thunder
dante’s
350 W Burnside St Shoot to Thrill (AC/DC Tribute), Grand Royale (Beastie Boys Tribute) & Unchained (Van Halen Tribute)
doug Fir lounge
830 E Burnside St. Joseph, Caleb Groh
duff’s Garage
2530 NE 82nd Ave Pin and the Hornits Big Band
Hawthorne Theatre
1507 SE 39th Ave. Enter Shikari, Stray From The Path, A Lot Like Birds
Hawthorne Theatre lounge
Kennedy School
duff’s Garage
SE 146th & Division St. The Brothers Osborne
Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall
portland Spirit Salmon Street dock
Star Theater
duke’s Bar & Grill
4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Tigers Jaw, Lemuria, SoMoS
Jimmy Mak’s
10350 N Vancouver Way Dylan Jakobson
portland State university
116 NE Russell St. The High Water Jazz Band, Pink Lady & John Bennett Jazz Band
Alhambra Theatre
ponderosa lounge
8409 N. Lombard St. Garry Meziere
2026 NE Alberta St. Sex Pest, Lithics, Sean Sumler
2530 NE 82nd Ave Satisfi, Tough Love Pyle
3000 NE Alberta St. Lady Sings The Blues: A Tribute To Billie Holiday
1503 SE Cesar E Chavez Blvd. Pediment, Agents of Ecco, Night of Elegance
doug Fir lounge
830 E Burnside St. Ural Thomas & the Pain, Tezeta Band, Rev Shines
White eagle Saloon
plews Brews
1981 W Burnside Sam Densmore, Johnny Ampersand
350 W Burnside St California Honeydrops, Liz Vice
210 NW 21st Ave. Sami Live
3000 NE Alberta St. Mason Jennings, Lucette
Mississippi Studios
Keller Auditorium
dante’s
Aladdin Theater
3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. Two Gallants
5736 NE 33rd Ave. The Low Bones
221 NW 10th Ave. What’s Your Pleasure: A Tribute to the Soul Masters of Funk
1825 SW Broadway Celebrate Svoboda
221 NW 10th Ave. Mel Brown B3 Organ Group
303 SW 12th Ave. Redwood Son
Kennedy School
116 NE Russell St. DJ Drew Groove & The Silver Fox, Everything’s Jake
SAT. April 18
1503 SE Cesar E Chavez Blvd. Side O’Slaw, The Colin Trio
4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Lyrics Born, Black Milk, Neka & Kahlo
The Secret Society
Alberta rose Theatre
Hawthorne Theatre lounge
Alhambra Theatre
8105 SE 7th Ave. Whiskey Deaf
duff’s Garage
1507 SE 39th Ave. Roger Clyne & The Peacemakers
13 NW 6th Ave. Goapele
Twilight Cafe and Bar
The Muddy rudder public House
3100 NE Sandy Blvd. Blood Freak & Drawn and Quartered, Infernus, Uada, Shroud of the Heretic, Weresquatch
Hawthorne Theatre
Star Theater
3120 N Williams Ave. Norman Baker & the Backroads
2026 NE Alberta St. The Fur Coats, Dragging an Ox Through Water, Skin Lies
836 N Russell St. pigWar & Condition White
1937 SE 11th Ave. Desert Relay Fever Dream, Cambrian Explosion
Wed. April 15
The Waypost Coffeehouse & Tavern
The Know
dante’s
2530 NE 82nd Ave Miller & Sasser, Stars of Cascadia, Oiaws
Al’s den
116 NE Russell St. Hip Hatchet & Jeffrey Martin, Anna Tivel, The Sportin’ Lifers
1420 SE Powell Blvd. Stein Project, Orion, King Ghidora
350 W Burnside St The Quick & Easy Boys, Euforquestra
ALL APOLOGIES: No one threw a couch out a window. No one needed to get stitches. Everyone’s clothes stayed on, and the chandelier hanging above the venue floor survived unscathed. But it was still The Replacements. And, as much as one could hope or expect in 2015, the show at the Crystal Ballroom on April 10 was everything a Replacements show should be. It was loose. It was indulgent. It was imperfect. It was great. More than the “hits”—and we got most of them over the course of about two hours, including a transcendent double shot of “Can’t Hardly Wait” and “Bastards of Young” and a slightly mangled “I Will Dare”—it was the random, seemingly superfluous moments that made this a true ’Mats show, not “The Paul Westerberg and Tommy Stinson Revue”: the improvised blues jam about Whole Foods; playing the Green Acres theme in response to unsolicited song requests from the crowd; the snippet of “Iron Man” and the medley of T. Rex songs; the second encore that came after the house lights went up and the crew began breaking down the stage. “Portland, we’re sorry,” Westerberg called out during “Portland,” a rarely played outtake about a particularly disastrous local ’Mats show from 1987. There was nothing to apologize for this time around, but consider it accepted. MATTHEW SINGER. See the full review at wweek.com/lastweeklive.
The Secret Society
revolution Hall
roseland Theater
13 NW 6th Ave. David Choi, Tess Henley 2026 NE Alberta St. Bombay Beach, Sex Pest, Lithics, Sean Sumler
The Melody Ballroom 615 SE Alder An Enchanted Evening
The Muddy rudder public House 8105 SE 7th Ave. Reverb Brothers
221 NW 10th Ave. Sabroso 5736 NE 33rd Ave. Mo Phillips and the Spaghetti Pants Dance Band, Rock Against Cystic Fibbrosis
laurelThirst public House
2958 NE Glisan St. Talking Heads Tribute Night at the Laurelthirst Pub
Mississippi Studios
3939 N Mississippi Ave. Moving Units
ponderosa lounge
10350 N Vancouver Way Dakota Poorman
reed College
3203 SE Woodstock Blvd. Simon Scott, Loscil, Marcus Fischer, Dweomer, No Parades
Star Theater
13 NW 6th Ave. Cedell Davis, Tuatara, Down North
The Bitter end
1981 W Burnside Amorus
The Historic Old Church
1422 SW 11th Avenue Choral Arts Ensemble of Portland Presents: Viennese Masters
The Tonic lounge
1420 SE Powell Blvd. Sorta Ultra, WNBA Jam
White eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Garcia Birthday Band
Wonder Ballroom
128 NE Russell St. Blue October, Harvard of the South, Ashleigh Stone
Sun. April 19
Wonder Ballroom 128 NE Russell St. Dead Milkmen, Li
Zion lutheran Church 1015 SW 18th Ave Portland Symphonic Girlchoir Music in the Making, Guest Composer-in-Residence Jim Papoulis
MOn. April 20 Al’s den
303 SW 12th Ave. Justin Farren
edgefield
2126 SW Halsey St. Will West wtih Groovy Wallpaper
Hawthorne Theatre
1507 SE 39th Ave. Richie Ramone (of The Ramones), Dime Runner, Sex Crime, 48 Thrills
Holocene
1001 SE Morrison St. Refracted, Obviate, DJ Ryan Organ
Jimmy Mak’s
221 NW 10th Ave. The Dan Balmer Trio, JSOs Battle of the Bands
Keller Auditorium
Al’s den
303 SW 12th Ave. Justin Farren
222 SW Clay St. Damien Rice, Marketa Irglova
Alberta rose Theatre
Mississippi Studios
3000 NE Alberta St. Tim Snider and Caio Andreatta, The Druthers and Saeeda Wright
Alhambra Theatre
4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Defeater, Counterparts, Capsize
Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall
1037 SW Broadway Peter and the Wolf
Crystal Ballroom
1332 W Burnside Street Kalin & Myles
doug Fir lounge 830 E Burnside St. Chris Pureka, Sera Cahoone
Habesha lounge
801 NE Broadway St. Mike Nord, Georg Hofmann, Andreas Stahel, Alto!, The Translucent Spiders, Chrome Mole Monocle
Hawthorne Theatre 1507 SE 39th Ave. Kiesza, Betty Who
Holocene
1001 SE Morrison St. Portland Post-Rock Festival: Entendre Entendre, Amos Val, Coastlands, A Collective Subconscious, Long Hallways
Mississippi Studios
3939 N Mississippi Ave. Rumer
roseland Theater
8 NW 6th Ave. Allen Stone, LILLA, Just People
rotture
315 SE 3rd Ave. The Skull, Midnight Ghost Train, Mos Generator, Diesto
St Michael lutheran Church 6700 NE 29th Ave Bachathon
The Know
2026 NE Alberta St. Nixon’s The One, Pageripper, The Cut 45
Valentines
232 SW Ankeny St. KPSU Presents: D3 x Th3rd, Sour Deez x F-Dot
3939 N Mississippi Ave. Acid Mothers Temple, ST 37
The Know
2026 NE Alberta St. Youth Avoiders, Dry Heaves, Bi-Marks, Steve
Valentines
232 SW Ankeny St. Snow Roller and Sioux Falls, Helens
Wonder Ballroom
128 NE Russell St. Dezarie, Vieux Farke Tour
TueS. April 21 Buckley Center Auditorium
5000 N. Willamette Blvd American Voices, University of Portland Orchestra
Bunk Bar
1028 SE Water Ave. Upset, Colleen Green
doug Fir lounge 830 E Burnside St. Stu Larsen
duff’s Garage
2530 NE 82nd Ave Missi and Baker
Jimmy Mak’s
221 NW 10th Ave. Mel Brown Septet, The Lincoln High School Jazz Band
Kelly’s Olympian
426 SW Washington St. Snowblind Traveler, Jackson Dean Walker, & Eagle Sun King
lincoln performance Hall 1620 SW Park Ave. Mozart’s Le Nozze Di Figaro
Mississippi Studios
3939 N Mississippi Ave. Marv Ellis & We Tribe, Lynx & the Servants of Song, DJ DV8
The Know
2026 NE Alberta St. Catholic Guilt, Bad Future, The Stops
The rialto Corner Bar 529 SW 4th Ave. Korrea
CONT. on page 60 Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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MUSIC CALENDAR
april 15–21 k at i e d e n n i s
BAR REVIEW
Where to drink this week. 1. The Drinking lot
419 E Burnside St. in a defunct used-car lot across the street from a functioning car lot, Bailey’s taproom is hosting an amazing bridgehead pop-up beer bar through saturday. You’ve already missed surly, but you can drink Bell’s on thursday.
2. Civic Taproom
621 SW 19th Ave., 477-4621, thecivictaproom.com. the Civic will host a battery of beer takeovers every day through Friday: Hop Valley, Base Camp, Buoy Beer and three Creeks. Get each beer with different colored french fries from Boise Fry Company next door.
3. Charlie Horse Saloon
627 SE Morrison St. Portland’s weirdest and most makeshift bar—sway Bar—has just become a fine facsimile of an Old West saloon, with your bachelor dad’s floor-toceiling paneling, cheap drinks and more taxidermy than the Bates Motel.
4. Donnie Vegas
1203 NE Alberta St. For every fictional character, a cocktail on tap: the Flanders is a wine spritzer embittered by aperol and drinking vinegar. the dude is—duh—a classy take on a white Russian. Because the dude is pure class.
5. The liquor Store
3341 SE Belmont St., 421-4483, theliquorstorepdx.com. With old papers, old records, a basement dance club, a seamless horseshoe bar and housemade Blue Curacao memorializing its predecessor, the Blue Monk, this bar is off to a hell of a good start.
JONES DREAMS OF CHIZU: There are more than 90 dudes named Steve Jones in Portland. We know, because we checked. But we’re wondering if some of the Joneses might just be clones of Portland’s famous cheesemonger. Because when we go into Mount Tabor’s Cheese Bar, there’s Steve Jones. When we go into the cheese window at the Commons’ new brewpub, he’s there, too. And there he was again at his West End sushi-themed cheesery, Chizu (1126 SW Alder St., chizubar.com). But Chizu—Japanese for “cheese”— is apparently Jones’ effort to slow down. Chizu places Jones in the role of master chef Jiro Ono, presiding humbly at the center of his tastefully appointed, burnished-wood elbow of a bar serving up cider, beer, sake and wine. You can order individually among 30 personally selected cheese varieties that change almost daily, but smart customers will just leave it to the expert by ordering omakase and choosing their price. For $20, we received five decadent cheeses—garnished appropriately with walnut, fig, mustard and Little T crostini—including our favorite, a Fourme Aux Moelleux bleu that was an explosion of light sweetness and heady penicillin funk, with Vouvray wine from the Loire injected into its middle. A soft English Tunworth tasted like a whole salad of winter vegetables, dressing included. The cheeses weren’t merely good—because face it, all cheese tastes pretty good—they all had immediate and recognizable character, like somebody in a Dickens novel. Hell, maybe there’s only one Steve Jones after all. MATTHEW KORFHAGE.
holocene
1001 SE Morrison St. Rockbox: DJ Kez, Matt Nelkin
lola’s room
Wed. Wed. April 15 Crystal Ballroom
1332 W Burnside Street Brews and Beats, Black Pistol Fire
Moloko plus
3967 N Mississippi Ave. The Diamond stylus with King Tim 33 1/3
Star Bar
639 SE Morrison St. DJ Suzanne Bummers
The lovecraft
421 SE Grand Ave. Event Horizon, Industrial Dance Night
The Whiskey Bar 31 NW 1st Ave What So Not
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Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
ThurS. ThurS. April 16 holocene
1001 SE Morrison St. Eddie Bermuda, DJ Bobby D, Maxx Bass
roseland Theater
8 NW 6th Ave. Soul’d Out Music Festival: Gramatik, Gibbz, Russ Liquid
Star Bar
639 SE Morrison St. DJ Jonny Cakes
The lovecraft
421 SE Grand Ave. Shadowplay
Fri. April 17 Branx
320 SE 2nd Ave. BlowPony: Christeene
1332 W Burnside 80s Video Dance Attack 10th Anniversary Party
Moloko plus
3967 N Mississippi Ave. Hans Fricking Lindauers 21st Century Rhythm & Soul Review
rotture
315 SE 3rd Ave. Sublimate: Electric Mantis, Eastghost
SAT. April 18 holocene
1001 SE Morrison St. Gaycation: Mr. Charming, DJ Snowtiger
Star Bar
639 SE Morrison St. DJ Sean PORK!
The Whiskey Bar 31 NW 1st Ave BT and Tydi
Sun. April 19 Star Bar
639 SE Morrison St. Dickeraoke!
The embers Avenue 110 NW Broadway Bloco Alegria
Mon. April 20 Star Bar
639 SE Morrison St. Metal Monday with DJ Blackhawk
The lovecraft
421 SE Grand Ave. Departures, DJ Waisted and Friends
Tue. April 21 Star Bar
639 SE Morrison St. DJ Ol’ Sippy
The lodge Bar & Grill 6605 SE Powell Blvd. DJ Easy Finger
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Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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april 15–21
Multnomah Falls
= WW Pick. Highly recommended. Most prices listed are for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply, so it’s best to call ahead. Editor: ENID SPITZ. Theater: ENID SPITZ (espitz@wweek.com). Dance: KAITIE TODD (dance@wweek.com). TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit information at least two weeks in advance to: espitz@wweek.com.
THEATER OPENINGS & PREVIEWS A View From the Bridge
For Arthur Miller’s 100th birthday year Third Rail brings A View From the Bridge, the American-Dream-goneawry story of a Sicilian longshoreman in Brooklyn. Miller’s is a dark look at how family entanglements can damper political freedom. Mark Strong, of The Imitation Game and Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy, applies his pensive gaze to the lead role of Eddie Carbone in this HD screening of the London West End production. World Trade Center Theater, 121 SW Salmon St. 2 pm and 7 pm Saturday. $20.
Grease
Nothing lightens up teen pregnancy scares and drag racing like a danceoff. Innocent Sandy, schmoozing Danny and their drama-filled friend groups, the Pink Ladies and the T-Birds, try to avoid detention and jive their darnedest for Rydell High’s spot on national TV. For once, a teen will paly a teen; recent Tigard High School graduate Paul Harestad joins the Broadway Rose mainstays and their Rocky Horror and Guys and Dolls credits. Broadway Rose New Stage Auditorium, 12850 SW Grant Ave., Tigard, 620-5262. 7:30 pm Thursday-Friday, 2 pm and 7:30 Saturday, 2 pm Sunday through May 24. $30-$42.
The Hard Problem
Tom Stoppard covered “to be or not to be” in his Shakespearian projects, Shakespeare in Love and Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead. This is his 21st-century version of the same hard problem. Stoppard hops on the current neuroscience-obsessed train with a drama about brain science researcher Hilary struggling with the psychological question: “What is consciousness?” She and collaborator Spike debate fMRIs and Hail Mary prayers in their search for something deep and ponderous about humanity. Fair warning: may cause mental fatigue. World Trade Center Theater, 121 SW Salmon St. 2 pm and 7 pm Sunday, April 19 and Saturday, April 25. $20.
Playtime with Pete and Randy
This puppet show for adults is a tongue-in-check romp with two adorable puppy dog puppets who try their hand at making artificial intelligence felines, taking over the world, winning science fairs, etcetera. In a break from Imago’s usual puppeteering, this one is ages 10 and older for “scenes of comic violence.” No puppets or puppies actually harmed in the making of this show. Imago Theatre, 17 SE 8th Ave., 2313959. 8 pm Friday-Saturday. $15.
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty
When not doing real theater, Lakewood fills the gap with staged readings, of Ben Stiller flops. Man or Superman? is this season’s theme and case study Walter Mitty, is 40, greying, paying off a mortgage and spends his life commuting to and from his wife. In his imagination, Mitty is an extravagant explorer and the seductive Willa de Wisp comes along to tempt him off his hamster wheel. Maybe a secret Clark Kent lurks inside. Or a secret Stiller. Lakewood Center for the Arts, 368 S State St., Lake Oswego, 635-3901. 7 pm Friday, 2 pm and 7 pm Saturday, April 17-18. $20.
Soul Harmony
In the late 1940’s, America’s music profile was shifting from Ellington and Sinatra to a little something called R&B. The movement largely rode on the soul-wrenching ballads of a black Baltimore group, the Orioles. But the Orioles and their legacy might’ve been
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just a blip if their leader, Sonny Til, hadn’t sung for songwriter Deborah Chessler through a phone when his group was still the fledgeling Vibranaires. Soul Harmony, Stumptown Stage’s musical based on critic Greil Marcus’ The Deborah Chessler Story, follows the partnership through fatal car crashes and race riots to the top of national charts. Greil Marcus will speak Thursday at the NW Film Center’s screening of American Hot Wax, an film expose on 1950s rock radio. Brunish Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 248-4335. 7:30 pm Thursday-Friday, 2 pm and 7:30 pm Saturday, 2 pm Sunday through May 3. $29.65-$43.95.
Closet Kardashian fans tired of birds and bikes can get their dish under the guise of local-arts patronage with this serial, semi-improv production a la Real Housewives—of Lake Oswego. Funhouse Lounge, 2432 SE 11th Ave., 841-6734. 7 pm Thursdays-Saturdays through April 25. $20.
People’s Republic of Portland
Former Daily Show correspondent Lauren Weedman gives her clichéd view of Portland as a kombuchaobsessed, gluten-fearing, beardedcyclist, strip-club Shangri-la. Locals will scoff, but since natives are now outnumbered by transplants, most viewers won’t know what’s missing. HALEY MARTIN. Gerding Theater, 128 NW 11th Ave., 445-3700. 7:30 pm Wednesdays-Saturdays, 2 pm Saturdays-Sundays. $40-$55.
Really Really
Really Really opens on the lingering wreckage of an epic party, strewn with mixed messages and school politics in this West Coast premier from one of New York’s rising off-Broadway writers, Paul Downs Colaizzo. For the 1950s version, see Grease in Openings & Previews. Portland Actors Conservatory, 1436 SW Montgomery St., 274-1717. 7:30 pm ThursdaySaturda, 2 pm Sunday. $5-$25.
School House Rock Live!
Re-learn the nuances of grammatical English with live-action jingles. Winningstad Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 248-4335. 2 and 5 pm Saturdays, 11 am and 2 pm Sundays through April 26. $15-$28.
Suddenly Last Summer
Nothing gets you hot and bothered, even in starch-collard Portland, like Tennessee Williams. Shaking the Tree Theater stages his Southern drama of familial secrets as juicy as its tropical New Orleans setting. The oppressive 1950s clash with “unmentionables” when Mrs. Holly and her niece debate the merits of her late son Sebastian, a prolific poet. Shaking the Tree, 823 SE Grant Ave., 235-0635. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays, 5 pm Sundays, through May 2. $5-$25.
The Price
“They don’t make ’em like they used to” is a motif in Arthur Miller’s writing, and it’s easily said of Miller himself. Staged for the centennial of Miller’s
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FEATURE PAT M O R A N
PERFORMANCE
Twelfth Night
Sadly, most people know Shakespeare’s 1601 comedy via Amanda Bynes’ movie She’s the Man. Viola disguises herself as a boy under the alias Sebastian and promptly falls in love with Duke, who loves Viola, who falls in love with Sebastian...and around in the Shakespearian rat race of twins, slapstick comedy and mistaken identities we go. With Post5, Shakespeare always gets a modern twist, so expect Chuck Taylors instead of codpieces at the company’s newly-relocated Sellwood stage.Opening night has a special drag show to follow, and following the cheap theater wave now surging, Sundays are always pay what you will. Post5 Theatre, 1666 SE Lambert St., 971-258-8584. 7:30 pm Friday-Sunday through May 16. $20.
NEW REVIEWS Cyrano
Cyrano’s 1897 premier introduced “panache,” meaning flamboyant, and there’s no better term for PCS”s largerthan-life staging. The talented wordsmith and swordsman, played with a bit too much gusto by Seattleite Andrew McGinn, can’t woo anyone with his massive nose, especially muselike Roxanne (Jen Taylor is also the play’s stand-out talent). So, he lets tongue-tied suitor Christian steal his words to win her. Roxanne lounges on a rose-laden balcony as her lovers serenade from below; fighting scenes stage raucous swordplay; almost everything is overplayed to schnaz-like proportions. “The battle’s more beautiful when it’s futile,” says Cyrano in his closing speech, and the play definitely is too, more successful as a spectacle of PCS’s well-funded theater than any exploration of pen versus sword. Gerding Theater, 128 NW 11th Ave., 445-3700. 7:30 pm Tuesday-Sunday, 2 pm Saturday-Sunday, noon Thursdays, through May 3. $36-63.
ALSO PLAYING Comedy of Errors
Two casts, one all-male and one allfemale, both with nonstop wordplay and overt sex jokes, follow the tragic separation and comedic reunion of two sets of twins, who’s who keeps everyone’s heads spinning until the neat tie-up. The women playing men do well, but even playing their own sex, the men feel like a botched boob job. Honestly, no one is spotting the difference; they’re still snickering because someone said “boob.” KATHRYN PEIFER. The Back Door Theater, 4319 SE Hawthorne Blvd. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Sundays. $18.
Is He Dead?
What’s pricier than original art? A dead artist’s original art. So, struggling artist Jean-Francois Millet kills himself. Or more accurately, he fakes his own death to boost the worth of his works. Magenta Theater, 606 Main St., Vancouver, 360-635-4358. 7:30 pm Thursday-Saturday, 2 pm April 18 and 25, through April 25. $15-18.
Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
AcTIng THeIr Age: The Young Professionals cast.
COLUMBINUS (OREGON CHILDREN’S THEATRE) When two teens in black trench coats marched through the halls of Columbine High School, most of the cast of Oregon Children’s Theatre’s Columbinus were just 2 years old. Now the age that Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold were then, the theater company is taking a rare dive into violent material, staging the notorious school massacre in a play by Chicago playwright PJ Paparelli, who spent months interviewing survivors and years studying the killers’ journals. Paparelli’s play follows an entire Breakfast Club of teen stereotypes—jock, flirt, drama nerd—as they snooze through their alarms and debate Darwin in biology class. When Harris (Thom Hilton) and Klebold (Blake Peebles) attack, they prowl maniacally through the school library, banging on tabletops. Each of their thuds signifies a lethal shot. The killers’ perilous relationship is especially chilling when played by teens. Preparing ammunition, Harris and Klebold argue, brawling right to the black box floor. It ends with Harris pointing a shotgun between his best friend’s eyes. “The greatest school shooting of all time,” says Harris. “And after that?” Klebold asks. “It’s blackness. It’s nothing. It’s just over.” This is an unusually dark scene for a children’s theater company that just staged The 3 Little Pigs. But the teen actors chose the play themselves. “Dani [Baldwin, OCT’s education director] gave us a stack of scripts to pick from,” says Hilton. “Right away, we all said, ‘This is the one.’”
The Children’s Theatre goes dark.
Director Lava Alapai admits the ample “fucks,” pregnancy scare and kiss shared by boys might put off OCT’s regular audience. But the cast says it’s playing high school as they see it —though that only takes them so far. “I had no idea what to do,” says Peebles of playing Klebold, “I was just a zombie and danced last time!” So the actors relied heavily on Paparelli’s wellresearched script. The playwright spent so much time in Littleton, Colo., that its residents called him for consolation after the Sandy Hook shooting in Connecticut, and he interviewed 30 more survivors for a 2012 rewrite, just after another tragic shooting at the midnight screening of Dark Knight Rises in Aurora, another suburb of Denver. To process any real or staged high-school drama with her cast, Alapai moderated a mini therapy session of sorts before and after each show. “First time we did the library scene, we went back into the kitchen and told, like, the dirtiest sex jokes,” says actress Charlotte Karlsen. “I was crying, and we were just like, ‘Fuck, fuck, la-la, sexy shit, let’s be teenagers!’” Hilton, who plays an explosive Harris literally writhing with hatred, says, “I basically think of my biggest fear and play that in the character onstage.” After, he sings himself a little mantra to detach from the darkness: “It’s super-dumb. It’s just a play. It is nothing.” ENID SPITZ. see IT: Columbinus is at Oregon Children’s Theatre’s Young Professionals stage, 1939 NE Sandy Blvd., 228-9571. 7 pm Thursday-Saturday, 1 and 5 pm Sunday, April 16-19. $15.
april 15–21
Tommy Davidson
birth, this is classic Miller expertly played by Artists Rep’s tight, virtuosic ensemble. Bickering brothers wrestle with family, capitalism and their manipulative father’s legacy while cleaning his estate for sale. CONOR EIFLER. Artists Repertory Theatre, 1515 SW Morrison St., 2411278. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays, 2 and 7:30 pm Sundays through April 26. $25-$46.
Booty Call cameo aside, Tommy Davidson is famous for his In Living Color variety show with Jamie Foxx and Jim Carrey. He started with standup in Washington, D.C. before stints in Jim Carrey’s Ace Ventura and lot of time impersonating the likes of Michael Jackson or Sammy Davis Jr. Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave., 888-643-8669. 8 pm Thursday, 7:30 pm and 10 pm Friday-Saturday. $20-$30.
COMEDY & VARIETY
DANCE
Damn I Hate You: Stories of Resentment and Grudges
Playback Theater gives its crowd the gratification of dwelling on past wrongs or raging against old enemies. As audience members narrate, the troupe spins their tales into live theater. No bonfire of exboyfriend memorabilia, unfortunately, but it gives a new meaning to catharsis. Hipbone Studio, 1847 E Burnside St., 358-0898. 7:30 pm Saturday, April 18. $15.
Burlescape!
Identity Crisis
It’s not all Cinderella stories and George Balanchine classics for ballet this season. Impact embraces the contemporary side of things, with four pieces including a world premiere by Princess Grace Fellowship winner—and occasional Beyoncé choreographer—Darrell Grand Moultrie, and the vibrant 1993 ballet Crayola by OBT’s first-ever resident choreographer, Dennis Spaight.
This monthly show produced by Zora Phoenix promises plenty of tease with its burlesque and boylesque performances by Tod Alan, Honeydew LaRoux and Hyacinth Lee. Crush, 1400 SE Morrison St, 235-8150. 9:30 pm Saturday. $10-$15. 21+.
Impact
Brody’s regular Fly Ass Jokes show inspired by the school-age game M.A.S.H. (Mansion, Apartment, Shack, House). The audience will shout out suggestions for Portland comics to monologue on-the-fly. David Mascorro, a Portlander soon to headline Bridgetown Comedy Festival, hosts. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 224-2227. 9:30 pm Friday. $8.
Nicolo Fonte’s Presto, and Nacho Duato’s Rassemblement follow, inspired by stories of homesick slaves. Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 222-5538. Various times. April 16-19 and 24-25. $25-$160. All ages.
Miss Kennedy’s Theater of Burlesque: The Twilight Zone
Miss Kennedy’s Twilight Zonethemed throwback leads audiences through time zones, superstition, sci-fi...plus something more sultry. William Batty does his best Rod Serling impression, aerialist Joleen Dickerson is creepy “Talky Tina,” a murderous living doll, and Nik Sin performs as a gremlin. Dante’s, 350 W Burnside St., 226-6630. 9 pm Sunday, April 19. $12-$20. 21+.
Pastie Pageant
This nine-week-long competition, mixes RuPaul’s Drag Race and Survivor, with burlesque and boylesque dancers competing weekly for the winning prize. A musical theme and a random skill have to be incorporated into the acts, judged by a rotating panel of Portland’s best burlesque performers. Funhouse Lounge, 2432 SE 11th Ave., 841-6734. 9:30 pm Thursdays through June 11. $7-$10. 21+.
For more Performance listings, visit
REVIEW GARY NORMAN
Kyle Dunnigan
Kyle Dunnigan might secretly be the source of Any Schumer’s funny. He’s written for all three seasons of Inside Amy Schumer, but does plenty standup of his own when not playing electric guitar (he released an album in 2009), appearing on late-night talk shows or with Schumer in Judd Apatow’s new Trainwreck movie. . Bossanova Ballroom, 722 E Burnside St., 2067630. 8 pm Thursday. $20. 21+.
PERFORMANCE
Late Night Action
Alex Falcone’s late-night comedy talk show hosts Project Runway Season 11 winner Michelle Lesniak, Portland Thorns FC defender Kat Williamson, WW’s Funniest 5 comic Curtis Cook, and hip-hop up-andcomer Vinnie Dewayne. Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave., 888643-8669. 8 pm Wednesday. $12. 21+.
Memoirs of a College Dropout
Grown Ups 2 and 22 Jump Street actor Jimmy Tatro does pretty well for a college dropout. Now he’s touring with pokes at collegiate life and frat-boy stereotypes. 2.3 million YouTube subscribers for LifeAccordingToJimmy is kind of like a degree. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave., 234-9694. 8 pm Friday, $30.
Rob Bell & Pete Holmes
This is just so atrocious you need to go. Is it destiny for Rob Bell, pastor, Mars Hill founder and author of Love Wins, to partner with Pete Holmes (of the recently-axed Pete Holmes Show on TBS)? They call their tour “Together at Last” and promise light-hearted enlightenment amid “the mess, the questions, the haunting sense that we’re all alone in a cold, dark universe, the drumming in our hearts insisting that there’s a point to all this madness,” as Bell puts it. Skip morning service in lieu of bacon and count this as church. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave., 234-9694. 8 pm Sunday, April 19. $30-$35.
Sexy Secrets
This dirty laundry is extra soiled. Improv comics spin crowd-courced secrets into a night of catharsis. You can air yours at devinharkness.wix. com/portland-secrets. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 224-2227. 10 pm Saturdays through April 25. $8.
mIndIng mannErS: nathan dunkin and Stephanie Cordell.
SCHOOL FOR LIES: The Shoebox Theater is almost too intimate—audiences at the aptly named space have to parade across stage to exit. It’s a fitting squeeze for Theatre Vertigo’s The School for Lies, where theatergoers sit in the social parlor of sharptongued widow Celimene (Stephanie Cordell). Lies is David Ives’ update of Molière’s The Misanthrope. a comic exposé of forced, 17th-century frilly civility. We meet Celimene on the eve of her court date, when convention dictates she keep the atmosphere in her home light and flirtatious. Enter Frank—a magnetic and constantly irked Nathan Dunkin—who rails against superficiality with the tedium of a college friend who forgot to leave his unchecked idealism in the dorm. This intersection of parlor society and 21st-century staging becomes a show of anachronisms. Ives’ rhyming couplets are dense with heady wordplay, but then comes Celimene freestyle rapping her scathing impersonations. Eliante’s pigtails and rainbow-laced Converse seem an unconfident design choice, as though actress Shawna Nordman couldn’t convey innocence without a teen’s wardrobe (which she can!). These modern additions already seem outdated, but the play is more successful paying homage to its original. Celimene’s dusterstyle skirts and patent pumps give her the vampiness and authority of a sharp-tongued socialite, and Heath Koerschgen is a foppish delight in a powdered wig in any decade. This parlor drama is all whimsical show, and JoAnn Johnson’s consistent direction, plus flying pastries and rogue glasses of wine, break the fourth wall to let us in on the joke. RIHANNA WEISS. SEE IT: The School for Lies is at the Shoebox Theater, 2110 SE 10th Ave., 306-0870. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays through May 9. $20. Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
MUSIC P. 49
Professional
$99 Home
VISUAL ARTS
april 15–21
= WW Pick. Highly recommended. By MEGAN HARNED. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit show information—including opening and closing dates, gallery address and phone number—at least two weeks in advance to: Visual Arts, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: mharned@wweek.com.
the separate works coalesced into a single installation. Through May 23. Portland ’Pataphysical Society, 625 NW Everett St., No. 104.
Justin James Reed: Shining Bodies
In Shining Bodies, Justin James Reed starts with medieval reliquaries—originally used to house spiritually significant bones, shrouds and other relics—but divests them of content to draw our attention to the ideas they represent, as framing devices that endow objects with mystical powers. The works are made of glass, referencing ideas of holy light. The show also includes experimental photographic work incorporating laser etching on paper, which burns away the surface layers to reveal a hidden image below. Traditional black-and-white photographs round out the show, which asks us to consider how medium structures the message. In addition to this exhibition, Reed will present a one-night, site-specific installation of new video work—a series of projections into fog— from 7 to 9 pm Saturday, April 18, at S1 (4148 NE Hancock St., s1portland. com). April 17-May 17. Melanie Flood Projects, 420 SW Washington St., No. 301, 862-7912.
New York Salon
untitled (woods) by justin james reed
Carolyn Cole: New Paintings
Carolyn Cole uses rich hues to create atmospheric abstractions on fairly large-sized canvases, titled after their dominant color. Two of her works are unique for being smaller in size than the rest, and I like them both slightly better than the others on display. Perhaps it’s because the smaller scale of both Red and Taupe give the colors more intensity, or that it draws the viewer closer into the work. Most likely it’s a combination of these: Because the colors don’t have to compete with the vastness of the larger canvases, they more powerfully catch the viewer’s attention. I’m always disinclined to tell women to go smaller, and the larger canvases do fill out the space more effectively than a collection of smaller ones would. But right now, most of the compositional action is centered, making the rest of the canvas feel like superfluous negative space. Through May 2. Butters Gallery, 520 NW Davis St., 2nd floor, 248-9378.
David Hilliard: Our Nature
What do Photolucinda, Blue Sky Gallery and the Portland Grid Project have in common? They’re all current or former projects co-founded by Christopher Rauschenberg, the local and internationally famous photographer currently exhibiting a photograph from his recent trip to Zanzibar. Despite Rauschenberg’s prominence, he’s not the main event. That distinction goes to photographs by David Hilliard. Working within formats of
three to five panels that are equal parts panorama and altar piece, Hilliard shows us human solitude and mutual comfort and reminds us that without artistic guidance to direct our gaze, our interior lives are as impenetrable to others as they are to ourselves.Through May 2. Elizabeth Leach Gallery, 417 NW 9th Ave., 2240521.
Fluid
Ceramic pieces, whether utilitarian or purely aesthetic, start out with soft, wet, pliable clay and end up hard and fragile. But the artists in Fluid, Peter Christian Johnson and Bobby Silverman, carry clay’s initial wet look over into their finished pieces, with sometimes disconcerting results. To see a ceramic artwork that appears to have water, slime, honey or molten lava flowing across it, is like looking at something that ought to be impossible. Not only is it a technical feat, it also sets up a cognitive dissonance that bids us re-examine our preconceptions of the medium itself. Through May 30. Eutectic Gallery, 1930 NE Oregon St., 974-6518.
Intisar Abioto: Contents
Contents, Intisar Abioto’s show up at Duplex, is full of incomplete narratives. This is the point, because between the images, mostly portraits, and the story of how she took those pictures, Abioto asks us to imagine the details. She tells us how her subjects make her feel: comfort from the woman who works
in the convenience store, pride for the young man who cares for the children, etc. She doesn’t know them all completely, and doesn’t try to present them completely to us. This means we have to work harder to know them, to know our friends, neighbors and community, but Abioto inspires us to rise to the challenge with beautiful people and evocative language. Through April 30.Duplex, 219 NW Couch St.
Julia Oldham: Farewell Brave Voyager
Farewell Brave Voyager is an installation of video, animation, music and drawing that memorialize two doomed space explorers, one fictional and one historical. While two screens playing different narratives could easily have distracted from both and overwhelmed the viewers in the small space, their differing scales and angles complimented each other instead. The animated piece, Laika’s Lullaby, was projected against the wall and told the story of an early Soviet space dog. Laika, man’s best cosmonaut, pants, sniffs, and looks out on Earth from the solitude of her grand voyage and coffin, set to a haunting composition by Lindsay Keast. Farewell Brave Voyager played on a smallish screen set perpendicular to the projection against the wall facing the door, and just about everyone could see both while they sat or stood. There were moments when the actors of the film seemed to be looking at the great emptiness of space alongside our canine hero. Through such moments
After a recent trip to New York City, Mark Woolley rounded up five New York artists who work in photography and curated them into an invigorating group show at his Pioneer Place gallery. In addition to Kyle Rudd, David Hanlon and Patrick Arias, the show features two artists more familiar to Portland art lovers. Noah and Nathan Rice, formerly known as the Christopher Twins, were longtime staples at Woolley’s gallery before they moved from Portland to New York five years ago. Working as a team, the twin brothers blend elements of photography, painting and collage. In works such as This City Is a Dagger, they overlay images drawn from film, cartoons and cityscapes, resulting in an enigmatic, Popflavored mélange. Through May 10. Mark Woolley Gallery @ Pioneer, 700 SW 5th Ave., 3rd floor, Pioneer Place Mall, 998-4152.
Paul Nudd: Nudd-Mutts & Mushups
Paul Nudd’s larger-than-life full-body drawings of “mutants-alien/human mash-ups” are weird in the best way possible. They stretch from floor to ceiling—with three stretching across opposite walls—making the viewer feel as though the microscope has been inverted and we’re now the subject of study. Those who don’t consider Nudd’s work the domain of “fine,” “experimental” or “avant-garde” art— with its obvious comic influences and lack of critical theory—probably won’t have the imagination to enjoy his work anyways. The Hap edition for this month is a collection of 30 smaller but equally grotesque and interesting drawings done in collaboration with a Chicago comic artist, for $30. A great way to add Nudd’s work to your esoteric visual collection without devoting an entire paycheck, or wall, to sup-
porting the arts. Through May 2. Hap Gallery, 916 NW Flanders St., 444-7101.
Showers/Gutters/Pipes/ Channels/Drips/Drifts/Tubes/ Runnels/Circles/Spirals/Boards/ Ponds/Hoses/Tunnels/Funnels/ Bubbles/Buildings/Bulbs/Speakers/ Fountains/Flowers/Showers
Only a show this cool could get away with a title this long. In early February, Austin, Texas-based artist Andy Coolquitt did a three-week residency in Portland, taking video and collecting old pipes, plastic sinks, buckets and other junk he found around town. He combined these into an immersive installation which has turned Disjecta into an eerie, vaguely postapocalyptic water-world. Everywhere you look, fountains are shooting water into distressed wooden crates; bubbly water churns mysteriously in buckets; and electric cords hanging from the rafters plunge sinisterly into vats of swirling liquid. A soundscape fills the gallery with the gurgling of water sluicing through gutters. At the show’s entrance, visitors are warned not to wander off the wood-planked path leading through this phantasmagoria, presumably for fear of slipping or electrocution. If you see any show at all this spring, this is the one to check out. It’s one of the most bizarre and impressive installations ever mounted at Disjecta—a tribute both to Coolquitt’s vision and the foresight of Disjecta’s departing curator-in-residence Rachel Adams, who leaves on a high—and very wet—note. Through April 26. Disjecta, 8371 N Interstate Ave., 286-9449.
Susan Seubert: The Fallacy of Hindsight
Hindsight is not always 20/20. That’s the crux of photographer Susan Seubert’s The Fallacy of Hindsight at Froelick. In three separate photo series, she explores a phenomenon that psychologists call “hindsight bias.” This refers to the often mistaken belief that one always knew without a doubt how a given situation would turn out. Seubert illustrates this idea—sometimes effectively, sometimes less than convincingly—through depictions of a figure bound in twine, images of an Arctic ice field and a set of Polaroidsized images representing memories. Through May 2. Froelick Gallery, 714 NW Davis St., 222-1142.
The World Is Not the Earth
This is a group show including James Castle, Austin Eddy, John O’Reilly, Blair Saxon-Hill and Timmy Straw. The works all develop a highly personal, complex narrative using collage and appropriation. Blair Saxon-Hill was included in last year’s Portland Biennial at Disjecta, and also has a concurrent solo exhibition this month at Fourteen30 Contemporary. April 18-May 30. Adams and Ollman, 811 E Burnside St.
For more Visual Arts listings, visit
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Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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APRIL 15–21
= WW Pick. Highly recommended. By PENELOPE BASS. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit lecture or reading information at least two weeks in advance to: WORDS, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: words@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.
WEDNESDAY, APRIL 15 Hilary Klein
For several years, writer and activist Hilary Klein lived in Chiapas, Mexico, working with women’s projects and documenting the women behind the Zapatista movement. Her new book, Companeras: Zapatista Women’s Stories, highlights the efforts of mothers, daughters and grandmothers as guerrilla insurgents and political leaders. Reading Frenzy, 3628 N Mississippi Ave., 274-8044. 7 pm. Free.
Kathleen Halme
Poet Kathleen Halme teaches at the Attic Institute. Her four collections of poetry, most recently My Multiverse, have earned her high praise, multiple awards and several arts fellowships. She will read a collection of her work for the Mountain Writers Series. Vie de Boheme, 1530 SE 7th Ave., 360-1233. 7:30 pm. $3-$5.
FRIDAY, APRIL 17 Spring Used Book Sale
The Friends of the Multnomah County Library’s annual Spring Used Book Sale will have more than 20,000 items for sale. This could be the year you finally complete your Nancy Drew collection. Gresham Station Shopping Center, 1271 NW Civic Drive, 665-9474. 6-9 pm Friday (members only), 9 am-6 pm Saturday, 1 am-4 pm Sunday, April 17-19. Free.
SATURDAY, APRIL 18 Back Fence PDX: Russian Roulette
You open the book with the D.H. Lawrence quote: “The essential American soul is hard, isolate, stoic, and a killer. It has never yet melted.” Do you think American culture is inherently violent? I take that D.H. Lawrence quote as a proposition; is it true or is it not? We do have a young country, and it was built on anti-authoritarianism—you know, “don’t tread on me.” I think there is a streak of that in a lot of us Americans, me in particular. I’ve never had a boss; I’ve never had to pretend to like anyone I don’t like. Our democracy has given me the ability and the time to make art; I think that’s a wonderful thing. Yet, from the earliest schooling, we are taught to be skeptical of authority. And I’m wondering where does that collide with the need to actually have society. My freedom impinges on your freedom, obviously. Where do we draw the line?
To forgive may be divine, but wanting to punch your co-worker in the throat for leaving crumbs on the table is simply human. Portland Playback Theater will present its new show, Damn I Hate You: Stories of Resentment and Grudges. You tell the story onstage and watch as actors and musicians bring it to life on the spot. Hipbone Studio, 1847 E Burnside St., 358-0898. 7:30 pm. $15.
SUNDAY, APRIL 19 David Biespiel
For 10 years, Portland poet and critic David Biespiel published a monthly essay in The Oregonian in what became the longest-running column about poetry in the country. His new book, A Long High Whistle, collects those essays into a contemplative collection that offers a passionate approach to poetry. Powell’s on Hawthorne, 3723 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 800-878-7323. 4 pm. Free.
MONDAY, APRIL 20 Verselandia! Poetry Slam
The fourth annual Verselandia! will bring together the winners of individual poetry slams from high schools across the city for the chance to win prizes, with one student being chosen grand slam champion. Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 248-4335. 7-9 pm. $13.50-$73.
TUESDAY, APRIL 21 Brian Doyle
Exquisite Poets Union Reading
Verses From a Cataclysm
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one story because of its difficulty, in that we have a schizophrenic narrator, and it was a challenge for me to try to inhabit him.
Stories of Resentment and Grudges
Storytelling showcase Back Fence PDX will host its version of Russian Roulette wherein performers spin the wheel o’ prompts and are given five minutes to come up with a true fiveminute story. Hilarity and humiliation ensue. Returning favorites include L.A.’s Geek Girl Authority founder, Audrey Kearns, along with PDXers Shelley McLendon and Jason Rouse. Disjecta, 8371 N Interstate Ave., 286-9449. 8 pm. $18. 21+.
The Exquisite Poets Union is a onetime exquisite corpse project with unidentified writers and a random reading order. Adding to the mystery will be an accompanying photo exhibit by the Unnamed Photography Ensemble, wherein six anonymous artists each submitted an abstract, photo-based image. Glyph Cafe & Arts Space, 804 NW Couch St., 719-5481. 2-5 pm. Free.
JAMIESON FRY
BOOKS
Who says the coming-of-age tale is strictly a human experience? In his new novel, Martin Marten, Portland author Brian Doyle (Mink River, The Plover) follows two wild, creative animals—Dave, a 14-year-old boy about to start high school, and Martin, a pine marten (think badger meets ferret)—about to leave home for the first time. Broadway Books, 1714 NE Broadway, 284-1726. 7 pm. Free.
Marat Grinberg and Judith Pulman will host a bilingual reading and discussion featuring new translations from the unpublished poetry of Jewish Soviet soldier Boris Slutsky. The focus is on exploring expressions of identity during cataclysmic times. Oregon Jewish Museum, 1953 NW Kearney St., 226-3600. 7 pm. $5-$8.
For more Books listings, visit
Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
T.C. BOYLE THE PROLIFIC NOVELIST TALKS UP GUN VIOLENCE AND THE RULE OF LAW. T.C. Boyle may very well be the master of topical literature. Told through expertly crafted prose, his novels manage to delicately dissect issues like illegal immigration (1995’s The Tortilla Curtain) or global warming (2000’s A Friend of the Earth) through compellingly drawn characters. In his new novel, The Harder They Come (Ecco, 400 pages, $27.99), Boyle uses his signature style of character study to examine the issue of gun violence, as told through a fictionalized account of shootings ripped from real life: a schizophrenic mass shooter and an ex-police officer who went on a shooting spree in Los Angeles. PENELOPE BASS. WW: Your new book was inspired by true events. What about those mass shootings resonated with you? T.C. Boyle: Like most Americans, I presume, I am very disturbed by what we see in terms of individual gun violence—what always seems to be a young, white man who is mentally disturbed and has access in our society to automatic weapons. In the past, sadly, these people might have just committed suicide. Now they are so angry with society they want to take as many of us with them as they can. I chose
Would you consider yourself anti-authoritarian? I am a pillar of society. Of course, in my younger years that might not have been true. But I do the right thing: I’m an environmentalist, I pay my taxes, etc. But what about the smaller things in society? What about wearing your seat belt, or the fact that the car insists that you wear it by dinging and dinging. What about smoking? What about drug use? Go to any public park and there is a list of prohibitions— no jumping from the bench, no sex in the grass, no smoking cigarettes, no dogs, no fun, no breathing the air. If we didn’t have those rules, there would be no park. But where can we withdraw completely from society, and when do we have to agree to be part of it? The Harder They Come is your 25th book. Do you have 25 more in you? Oh, absolutely, easily. I’ll probably shake that out by the end of the tour. In fact, I’m at the halfway point of my new novel, which is called The Terranauts. It’s set in the 1990s in Arizona, and it’s a fictional account of the biosphere experiment. We could also say that the [current] book speaks to environmental themes as well, because Adam [the main character] wants to be part of nature and wants to go back to nature as a release valve. I wish people didn’t have guns. I wish the NRA, which controls both houses in Congress and everybody, didn’t exist. But it does. And until we have truly representative government, which is not government by the corporation or by the dollar—which buys the politician—we will have this problem. GO: T.C. Boyle reads at Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 800-878-7323, on Thursday, April 16. 7:30 pm. Free.
aPRil 15–21 FEATURE
= WW Pick. Highly recommended.
THIERRY ARDITTI
MOVIES
Editor: ENID SPITZ. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, send screening information at least two weeks in advance to Screen, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: espitz@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.
Belle and Sebastian
B+ Six-year-old Sebastian (Félix
Bossuet), a lonely orphan, befriends a misunderstood Great Pyrenees dog, and together they thwart Nazis in Nicolas Vanier ‘s movie adaptation of the 1960s French TV series. It’s a cute movie about a boy and his dog. Except it’s set during the Holocaust in Nazi-occupied France, where Sebastian’s caretaker smuggles Jews through the Alps and violent soldiers threaten Belle’s fluffy existence. So, it’s a delicate movie about a sweet boy befriending a loyal dog while thousands tragically die in one of the darkest conflicts in human history. But it’s, like, a really precious way to introduce your kids to genocide via a bilingual family film. R. CURTIS COOK. Northwest Film Center.
Danny Collins
B+ This simultaneously hackneyed and likable rock-’n’-roll redemption tale follows Al Pacino as Danny, a music celebrity who, 40 years after the fact, discovers John Lennon wrote him a letter. Danny is performing greatest hits for the AARP demo, when the belated arrival of Lennon’s letter sends him to a sleepy New Jersey Hilton where he hopes finally to connect with his neglected son Tom (Bobby Cannavale). Like Danny, Pacino has verged on self-parody in recent decades, but he turns Danny’s showmanship into a character trait, a reflexive instinct to connect with and charm everyone he meets, from entire concert halls to gobsmacked parking valets. Pacino makes even the shortest moment of banter feel genuine, true to his art. R. SEAN AXMAKER. Cedar Cills, Clackamas Town Center, Bridgepot Village, City Center, Fox Tower,
Do You Believe?
The filmmakers of God’s Not Dead intertwine 12 stories with the theme of faith. It’s like Love Actually, but focused on a different white-bearded man. Not screened for critics. PG-13. Showing at most Portland-area theaters.
Freetown
A group of Liberian Mormon missionaries flee civil war for Freetown, Sierra Leone. Achieving freedom proves much more complicated than the name implies. Not screened for critics. PG-13. Centruy Clackamas.
Monkey Kingdom
Baby monkeys actually look like a fetal Bruce Jenner, but we still can’t wait for these critters to swing from our heartstrings. Seriously upset this film was not screened for critics. G. Showing at most Portland-area theaters.
Paul Blart Mall Cop 2
Kevin James takes his daughter to Vegas and saves the world on a Segway. Not screened for critics. Opens Thursday at most Portlandarea theaters. PG. Showing at most Portland-area theaters.
The Room
[ONE NIGHT ONLY, REVIVAL] The Room, by all accounts, was intended as a serious drama about Johnny (Wiseau), a San Francisco banker struggling with an unfaithful fiancee, a back-stabbing best friend, a drugusing, adopted ward, and a pushy, balding psychologist who is always giving Johnny unsolicited, emotionally blunt advice. But what started as a bland tragedy instantly became a sublime comedy. R. KEVIN BURKE. Cinema 21.
GREIL MARCUS
True Story
B- Disgraced New York Times
reporter Michael Finkel (Jonah Hill) gets a shot at redemption in this true story based on his 2005 book. Jobless after fabricating the subject of a cover story for newspaper’s Sunday magazine, Mike is back in Montana with his girlfriend (Felicity Jones, The Theory of Everything) when news breaks that wanted Oregon murderer Christian Longo (James Franco) was using his name when he was arrested in Mexico for killing his wife and three kids. Mike hopes to exploit the scoop to make a comeback. Hill has a knack for portraying earnest, awkward characters (in The Wolf of Wall Street and Jump Street movies). But as Mike lectures Chris, he falls back on the secondhand tropes of a desperate journalist. The language feels right, but it isn’t original. Meanwhile, Franco gives the superior, quieter performance. This rather pat and schematic movie drags toward Chris’ trial and betrayal of Mike, and Mike keeps insisting on getting his “second chance,” making you wish the movie weren’t so aligned with that dubious goal. R. BRIAN MILLER. Showing at most Portland-area theaters.
HOW ROCK ’N’ ROLL WAS BORN. BY jaY hoRton
WW: Why American Hot Wax? Greil Marcus: Very few people have seen it or even heard about it. I always love the chance to get people to see this wonderful movie and talk about it.
Unfriended
Another cyber-stalking, teen-bullying horror flick. This time the chubby one gets his hand in a blender, which makes Google hangouts even less fun. Screened after deadline, see wweek. com for a review. R. Showing at most Portland-area theaters.
Was Alan Freed the only reason Cleveland got the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame? He came up with the Rock ’n’ Roll Party on Cleveland radio in 1951. He held Cleveland’s first Rock ’n’ Roll Jamboree, and at that time the audience was almost all black, the performers were all black. That’s where the idea took shape—the idea of rock ’n’ roll. And they came up with more money and more civic backing than any other place. Cleveland needed and wanted the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.
White God
C+ The revolution is televised in Kornél Mundruczó’s White God. And it’s adorable. The film is an immigration allegory in the guise of a story about a girl and her dog. Pup Hagen is loathed by the Hungarian authorities and his nosy neighbors because he’s mixed-breed. When Lili’s father makes her get rid of her pet, Hagen is cast out among unsavory characters on the streets and Lili sets off to reclaim him. What starts as low-key, even neorealist storytelling turns into something far more fantastical by film’s end, when all the mutts and strays confined to the pound liberate themselves and descend upon the city like vengeful locusts. Though presumably meant to be hard-hitting, it’s mostly just cute— these impressive canines deserve a better master. R. MICHAEL NORDINE. Living Room Theaters.
You’ve reviewed movies with rock stars playing actors, but almost never comment on projects where actors play rockers. What about Soul Harmony? I haven’t seen it. I haven’t heard it. I haven’t watched videos. But I’ve seen a lot of feature films based on real musicians. We all have. It works when a story is heavily fictionalized to bring out the drama. It works when it’s all very dry and keeps solely to the facts. It depends on the actors and the directors and the script and the synergy between all of those people. There’s no way of saying this works or that doesn’t.
STILL SHOWING A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night
A- Writer-director Ana Lily
Amirpour’s A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night is an eclectic cinematic mishmash: an Iranian noir-spaghetti Western-love story with vampires. And yet, somehow, it all works. JOHN LOCANTHI. Laurelhurst Theater.
Big Hero 6
A Shelving wordy cleverness for its own sake, ignoring parental intrusion, and allowing moral lessons to develop organically through a simplified storyline, Big Hero 6 is that rarest thing: an animated children’s adventure designed purely to delight its target audience. Substantial swaths of the picture are devoted to nothing loftier than portraying just how unstoppably cool soaring on the back of your own robot would feel. PG. JAY HORTON. Regal Vancouver, Valley.
243-2122
Rock critic Greil Marcus is famous for placing rock ’n’ roll amid the pantheon of myth and greatness with Mystery Train and Lipstick Traces. He did the same for Sleater-Kinney, naming it the greatest band in the world back in 2001. Marcus will take the mic Thursday, April 16, to introduce two very different narratives about the birth of a musical genre. The 1978 movie American Hot Wax profiles Alan Freed, the Cleveland DJ credited with naming rock ’n’ roll, and the musical Soul Harmony, opening at Portland’s Brunish Theatre, is inspired by Marcus’ essay on the growth of R&B. JAY HORTON.
CO U R T E SY O F PA R A M O U N T P I C T U R E S
OPENING THIS WEEK
THe man Of myTH: Greil marcus.
But you know whether the camera loves someone. Compare the real Jerry Lee Lewis to that ’80s biopic. I love Jim McBride [director of 1989’s Great Balls of Fire!]. I think he’s a wonderful director. He doesn’t know when to stop, and that’s what’s great about him. There’s a scene in that movie where Dennis Quaid is up on this stage surrounded by chicken wire, and [he’s playing] this one note on the piano. People start dancing, two women in particular start shimmying, and it’s just one of the most exciting things you’ve ever seen. You could argue that before your article on Sleater-Kinney in 2001, Portland was fly-over country. It’s not fly-over country for me. Best place in the country. Not to get into Portlandia, but why do you think [I’m Not There director] Todd Haynes moved to Portland? He’s from L.A., went to college at Brown, lived in New York for 16 years, and, when he decides he wants to leave, where does he want to go? He wants to go where there’s interesting people. He wants to come to Portland! Do you think, as a music critic, you have power? The point is, who’s paying attention? Who is trying to pin down what’s really interesting in the world right now? Whether it’s an advertisement, a record, a scene in a movie, a flub in a political speech… whatever it is, there are people around to say, “This is different! There are new things under the sun!” Who should people be reading? You know, I just go piece by piece. But I think people should be reading Percival Everett, a novelist in Los Angeles who has written around 25 books. And maybe Colson Whitehead will give you a better sense of the undercurrents of culture today than any conventional music critic. If people want to find out about music… I’d say, read novels.
Birdman
B- If Birdman’s message is that Hollywood a place of debased, greed-driven entertainment, Alejandro González Iñárritu doesn’t make a convincing—or even amusingly satirical—argument. R.
CONT. on page 69
freed THe ’50s: Tim mcIntire in American Hot Wax.
GO: Greil Marcus introduces American Hot Wax at NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium, 1219 SW Park Ave., at 7 pm Thursday, April 16. Marcus speaks at Antoinette Hatfield Hall, 1111 SW Broadway, at noon Thursday, April 16, about Soul Harmony, which will be performed at the Brunish Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, on ThursdaysSundays, April 16-May 3.
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Chappie
B- Essentially a mashup of Short Circuit, Robocop and assorted direct-to-video action films from the ’80s. It’s all to say that Chappie is pretty fucking stupid. But if you lower your expectations, it’s also kind of a blast. r. AP KRYZA. Academy, Avalon, Centur Eastpost, Kennedy School, Mission, Valley.
Cinderella
D+ Kenneth Branagh’s tiresome live-action retcon of Cinderella, pG. JOHN LOCANTHI. Showing at most Portland-area theaters.
Fifty Shades of Grey
D Fifty Shades turns what was supposed to be a torrid affair into an overly serious episode of Beverly Hills 90210 with some timid softcore erotica thrown in. r. JOHN LOCANTHI. Eastport Plaza, Regal Vancouver.
still reeling from the death of her mother (Ashley Judd), the destruction of her mother’s faction and the near annihilation of her own faction at the hands of Jeanine (Kate Winslet), who leads Erudite, yet another faction. Tris has an aptitude for multiple factions and is therefore “divergent,” which is bad. Why the factions want to eliminate divergents will never fully make sense. It’s best not to think about any of this too hard. The film is essentially one long fight with occasional changes of scenery. Director Robert Schwenke spends some time trying to develop this drama, or at least as much as any dumb action movie invests in character development. It’s probably good that the old “chick flick” has been abandoned, and that the success of The Hunger Games and the Divergent series proves that
teenage girls like watching bloodshed, explosions and mayhem, too. pG-13. JOHN LOCANTHI. Showing at most Portland-area theaters.
Into the Woods
loved musical has finally made it to the big screen. The mash-up of cautionary fairy tales is fun, with the Witch (Meryl Streep) pushing a young couple (James Corden and Emily Blunt) to undo a family curse they inherited. pG. RIHANNA WEISS. Empirical, Vancouver Plaza.
A- When your guard is lowered, something truly terrifying like It Follows can burrow into your psyche. We meet Jay (Maika
CONT. on page 70
REVIEW
B- Great con-man movies—a sub-
genre old as cinema itself—strike a difficult balance between breezy capers and deeper examinations of character motives. Focus hits most of the right notes. It’s a slick, funny and sometimes suspenseful yarn, a picture that’s light on its feet and mostly forgettable, but it still manages moments of intrigue. r. AP KRYZA. Academy, Avalon, Vancouver Plaza.
Furious 7
A- Furious 7’s action and ridicu-
Get Hard
C+ Get Hard is a movie about a rich white guy hiring a poor black guy to get him ready for a stint in prison. Given that premise, it’s actually kind of surprising how frequently it manages to avoid being terrible. The jokes punch up. James (Will Ferrell) is some generic financial patrician who commits some generic financial crime. He’s awful: He promises his wife (Alison Brie) that he’s going to make enough money in a day to choke a baby and tells Darnell (Kevin Hart), “Just so you know, I would have done the same thing if you were white,” after knocking on Darnell’s window to give him his keys at the car wash where he works. There’s nothing subversive, nothing clever or surprising, just gems like “they fucking in San Quentin,” from Mr. Hart. Prison rapes happen. A lot. Ha?. r. JAMES HELMSWORTH. Showing at most Portland-area theaters.
Home
A technicolor extraterrestrial descends to Earth. Children learn acceptance of all critters, no matter their gummy-bear hue. It’s basically Up, with more tech specs and less soul. PG. Showing at most Portland-area theaters.
Insurgent
C- The Divergent Series: Insurgent is essentially a dumb action movie, except with the traditional gender roles reversed. The hero is a woman. The villain is a woman. The ever-supportive eye candy is a dude. They kill a lot of people. In the Divergent series, dystopian future Chicago is ruled by five factions, each defined by a personality trait. The second film in this series picks up where the first left off: Our hero, Tris (Shailene Woodley), is
Kingsman: The Secret Service (R) 12:35PM 3:45PM 7:05PM 10:15PM Longest Ride, The (PG-13) 10:40AM 1:40PM 4:40PM 7:40PM 10:40PM It Follows (R) 11:40AM 2:15PM 4:55PM 7:30PM 10:05PM Woman In Gold (PG-13) 11:05AM 1:50PM 4:35PM 7:25PM 10:10PM Home (PG) 10:55AM 12:10PM 1:25PM 2:40PM 4:05PM 5:15PM 6:35PM 9:10PM 10:20PM True Story (R) 11:55AM 2:30PM 5:05PM 7:40PM 10:15PM Unfriended (R) 11:00AM 1:20PM 3:40PM 6:00PM 8:20PM 10:40PM Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 (PG) 11:10AM 12:20PM 1:40PM 2:55PM 4:10PM 5:25PM 6:40PM 7:55PM 9:15PM 10:25PM
It Follows
Focus
lousness make it perhaps the best yet. Its tribute to Paul Walker, who tragically died (in a high-speed car wreck) before the film wrapped makes it one of the most affecting movies about things exploding ever made. The central chase scene is frantic and ludicrous and Dwayne “The Rock” Robinson flexes his sinewy biceps so hard that he breaks a goddamned plaster cast. This time, the team takes on terrorists and Deckard Shaw (Jason Statham), AP KRYZA. pG-13. Showing at most Portland-area theaters.
Furious 7 XD (PG-13) 12:50PM 4:05PM 7:20PM 10:30PM
B+ Stephen Sondheim’s much-
COuRTESY OF uNIvERSAL
REBECCA JACOBSON. Academy, Laurelhurst, Joy Cinema, Valley.
MOVIES
hard and wired: alicia Vikander as the robot vixen ava.
EX MACHINA
McFarland, USA (PG) 12:45PM 3:50PM 7:00PM 10:05PM Monkey Kingdom (G) 12:30PM 2:50PM 5:10PM 7:30PM 9:50PM Danny Collins (R) 11:20AM 2:05PM 4:50PM 7:35PM 10:25PM Divergent Series: Insurgent, The 3D (PG-13) 7:45PM Cinderella (2015) (PG) 10:40AM 1:30PM 4:20PM 7:10PM 10:00PM Home 3D (PG) 7:50PM Child 44 (R) 12:40PM 4:00PM 7:15PM 10:30PM Get Hard (R) 12:00PM 2:45PM 5:20PM 8:00PM 10:35PM Furious 7 (PG-13) 10:45AM 11:45AM 1:55PM 3:00PM 5:10PM 6:15PM 8:25PM 9:30PM Divergent Series: Insurgent, The (PG-13) 10:50AM 1:45PM 4:45PM 10:40PM Furious 7 (PG-13) 11:45AM ® 3:00PM ® 6:15PM ® 9:30PM ®
OK Kanmani (Primetech) (NR) 12:30PM 3:45PM 6:45PM 9:50PM Monkey Kingdom (G) 10:55AM 1:10PM 3:25PM 5:40PM 7:55PM 10:10PM Woman In Gold (PG-13) 11:05AM 1:45PM 4:25PM 7:05PM 9:45PM Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 (PG) 11:00AM 12:00PM 2:25PM 3:50PM 4:50PM 7:15PM 9:40PM While We’re Young (R) 12:05PM 2:30PM 5:00PM 7:25PM 10:00PM Unfriended (R) 11:00AM 1:15PM 3:30PM 5:45PM 8:00PM 10:15PM True Story (R) 11:00AM 1:50PM 4:40PM 7:30PM 10:20PM Home (PG) 10:55AM 12:05PM 1:20PM 2:35PM 5:05PM 7:35PM 10:05PM
Cinderella (2015) (PG) 11:05AM 1:50PM 4:35PM 7:20PM
OK Kanmani (Primetech) (NR) 12:30PM 3:45PM 6:45PM 9:50PM Monkey Kingdom (G) 10:55AM 1:10PM 3:25PM 5:40PM 7:55PM 10:10PM Woman In Gold (PG-13) 11:05AM 1:45PM 4:25PM 7:05PM 9:45PM Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 (PG) 12:00PM 2:25PM 4:50PM 7:15PM 9:40PM While We’re Young (R) 12:05PM 2:30PM 5:00PM 7:25PM 10:00PM Unfriended (R) 11:00AM 1:15PM 3:30PM 5:45PM 8:00PM 10:15PM True Story (R) 11:00AM 1:50PM 4:40PM 7:30PM 10:20PM Home (PG) 10:55AM 12:05PM 1:20PM 2:35PM 3:50PM 5:05PM 7:35PM 10:05PM
Cinderella (2015) (PG) 11:05AM 1:50PM 4:35PM 7:20PM
10:05PM Child 44 (R) 12:30PM 3:55PM 7:10PM 10:20PM Longest Ride, The (PG-13) 1:30PM 4:30PM 7:30PM 10:30PM Danny Collins (R) 6:15PM 9:00PM Get Hard (R) 11:30AM 2:00PM 4:30PM 7:00PM 9:30PM Furious 7 (PG-13) 11:05AM 12:40PM 2:15PM 3:50PM 5:25PM 7:05PM 8:35PM 10:15PM Divergent Series: Insurgent, The (PG-13) 11:10AM 2:00PM 4:50PM 7:40PM 10:30PM
10:05PM Child 44 (R) 12:30PM 3:55PM 7:10PM 10:20PM Longest Ride, The (PG-13) 12:40PM 3:50PM 7:00PM 10:10PM Danny Collins (R) 6:15PM 9:00PM Get Hard (R) 11:30AM 2:00PM 4:30PM 7:00PM 9:30PM Furious 7 (PG-13) 11:05AM 12:40PM 2:15PM 3:50PM 5:25PM 7:05PM 8:35PM 10:15PM Divergent Series: Insurgent, The (PG-13) 11:10AM 2:00PM 4:50PM 7:40PM 10:30PM
FRIDAY
artificial intelligence includes sex ed in alex Garland’s latest.
Frankenstein’s monster is easy on the eyes in Ex Machina, a sexualized science-fiction movie that comes right out and addresses what many of its forebears merely danced around: that robots will eventually be hot, and attraction is inevitable. Alex Garland’s tale of a coder named Caleb (Domhnall Gleeson), whisked away by his genius boss (Oscar Isaac) for a top-secret project, is familiar. But we’re enticed enough to follow along anyway. Caleb arrives via helicopter at Nathan’s secluded hideout, which looks like 2001 by way of a luxe Scandinavian furniture catalog. Nathan, in the now-familiar role of a billionaire tech mogul playing God, evinces a bro-ish charm as he welcomes Caleb to his pad. After plying his new apprentice with drinks, establishing a first-name basis and forcing Caleb to sign an ironclad nondisclosure agreement, Nathan finally reveals what he’s working on: the most advanced artificial intelligence ever created. Caleb’s job is to determine whether the robot can pass the Turing test—i.e., convince a human that she isn’t a robot, that she’s all woman. And oh, what a woman she is! Alicia Vikander plays the robot vixen Ava as thoughtful, self-aware and at times flirty with her interlocutor. But Garland is careful to leave most of the specifics to our imaginations. Verbal sparring does most of the legwork. This may seem hard to believe, given how smoothly humanandroid relations tend to go in such movies, but all is not well. Nathan keeps a stockpile of secrets behind his slick façade, and Ava, who may or may not be into the whole captivity thing, has a few of her own. Ex Machina keeps us working to figure out who’s playing whom among the intelligent trio, maintaining its thrill factor as Caleb’s loyalty is called into question. Really worthwhile sci-fi raises more questions than it answers, and Garland strikes that fine balance between expository conversations and testing heady theories. Still, the end result isn’t much more thought-provoking than an average Black Mirror episode, namely one with Gleeson on the other end of the man-robot love spectrum. Ex Machina is a fine update to the artificial-intelligence genre, but it’s made almost entirely of pre-existing parts. MICHAEL NORDINE. B-
see it: Ex Machina is rated R. It opens Thursday at Fox Tower. Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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APRIL 15–21
Monroe), a normal 19-year-old girl falling for dreamboat Hugh (Jake Weary). Following their fi rst sexual encounter, Jay awakens in an abandoned warehouse, bound to a wheelchair. That’s when Hugh lays it all out: When they had sex, he passed along a curse. Until she sleeps with somebody else, she will be followed by a malicious force. For most of the movie, you’ll be too nervous to think about allegories—and too busy looking over your shoulder. R . AP KRYZA. Showing at most Portlandarea theaters.
in Alabama, is not perfect, but it arrives at a historic moment that will leave only the most blinkered viewer feeling chuff ed about the superiority of the present to the past. Violence here is never aestheticized for its own sake, but brought to life so that we might understand its escalation and impact. The fi lm is transfi xing, but not easy to watch. And it should not be easy to watch . PG-13 . CHRIS STAMM . Academy, Laurenhurst Theatre, Vancouver.
Jupiter Ascending
A- Ethan Hawke’s documentary presents the life and lessons of noted piano guy Seymour Bernstein. Look for John Locanthi’s review at wweek. com. PG . Regal Fox Tower.
B A wholly illogical fairy-tale
denouement that leaves little expectation of sequels. PG-13 . JAY HORTON . Avalon, Vancouver, Valley.
Kingsman: The Secret Service
A- Remember when spy movies were
fun? Kingsman: The Secret Service does. R . Showing at most Portlandarea theaters.
Kumiko: The Treasure Hunter
B+ A lost soul in Tokyo who takes
her fascination with Fargo to dangerous extremes. She sets off to unearth Fargo’s fictional buried treasure. In a lesser film, Kimiko’s innocence and her bunny, Bunzo, could easily devolve into the precious but hollow quirks typical of indie features. But the trajectory of Kumiko, the Treasure Hunter is too tragic for precociousness or to inspire much laughter. MICHAEL NORDINE. Hollywood Theatre.
The Longest Ride
D+ As simplified, sanitized, ruthlesslyaspirational heroes of tenth Nicholas Sparks adaptation The Longest Ride, bullriding champ Luke (Scott Eastwood) and budding art gallery intern Sophia (Britt Robertson) stick their landings in the only scenes the author’s fanbase cares about, handheld strolls across North Carolina resortland; creepily-prolonged embrace midst moistened canoodling. But their blinkered unwillingness to compromise makes for awkward romantic fantasy, especially when set against the sepia-steeped remembrances of an elderly car crash victim (Alan Alda) befriended by Sophia. Any honest film would deem the bloodless strivers undeserving of love and incapable of regret, but, alas, this is not Mr. Sparks’ first rodeo. PG-13 JAY HORTON. Showing at most Portland-area theaters.
McFarland
Having previously assisted underdog baseball and football teams, Kevin Costner now coaches an underdog 1980s track team. There are ethical epiphanies about race relations and being true to oneself. PG. Showing at most Portland-area theaters.
Mr. Turner
B+ Known as “the painter of light,”
Seymour: An Inntroduction
Slaughter Nick for President
B Archival clips of the ponytailed and orange-skinned Stewart doing somersaults while holding a gun . AP KRYZA . Vancouver Plaza.
Still Alice
A- Still Alice charts a linguistics professor’s descent into early-onset Alzheimer’s disease. Richard Glatzer and Wash Westmoreland’s fi lm has an element of carefully balanced melodrama, thanks to a tightly written script and Julianne Moore’s Alice begins the fi lm as a put-together Columbia professor who beats herself up for forgetting a single word in a lecture. As Alice’s memory worsens, Moore loosens her performance in a gradual, almost imperceptible manner. The fi lm is somewhat hampered by an overly dramatic score and a few lackluster performances, though Kristen Stewart’s work as Alice’s free-spirited daughter is a refreshing turn for the usually stoic actress. PG-13 . BLAIR STENVICK . Fox Tower.
The Hunting Ground
B+ Documentarians Kirby Dick and Amy Ziering reunite following 2013’s successful The Invisible War to interview collegiate victims of sexual violence. Young women and men speak convincingly about their personal nightmares and make a clear call to action. As an exposé, The Hunting Ground hits its mark, tasking us all to do our homework. JAMES WALLING. PG-13.
The Theory of Everything
B- A brief history of Stephen Hawking’s 30-year marriage to Jane Wilde, The Theory of Everything fits a tad too snugly into the biopic tradition. Here, Hawking’s contributions to the fields of physics and cosmology take a backseat to the story of his and Wilde’s courtship, marriage and eventual divorce. PG-13. MICHAEL NORDINE. Academy, Laurelhurst.
What We Do in the Shadows
B+ The last thing pop culture needs
J.M.W. Turner created some of the world’s most awe-inspiring artwork. His landscapes are by turns frightful and beautiful, and the same goes for Mr. Turner. R . MICHAEL NORDINE . Lake Theater.
is another vampire fl ick. The secondto-last is more reality TV. Leave it to a pack of Kiwis—including Jemaine Clement of Flight of the Conchords fame—to give us both and somehow make vampires and reality TV feel fresh. JOHN LOCANTHI . Cinema 21.
Ned Rifle
While We’re Young
The third in Hal Hartley’s Henry Fool trilogy, about a murderous son set to exact revenge on his father. NR. Laurelhurst Theater
Paddington
The cuddly, floppy hat-wearing bear gets his own live-action feature. PG. Avalon, Valley, Vancouver Plaza.
Run All Night
Liam Neeson pits his very specific set of skills against Ed Harris as the Neesonaissance continues unabated. R. Eastport, Division Street.
The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel
B Old people . PG . JOHN LOCANTHI .
Showing at most Portland-area theaters.
Selma
A- Selma, Ava DuVernay’s drama
about three 1965 civil rights marches
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AP FILM STUDIES C O U R T E S Y O F T R I S TA R
MOVIES
A- This Gen-X midlife-crisis movie is a career-best comedy for both Ben Stiller and Noah Baumbach. Filmmaker Josh (Stiller) and producer wife Cornelia (Naomi Watts) are stalled in careers and marriage. He can’t complete his unwatchable opus; they’ve tried IVF and failed, and are in a childless rut. The shakeup comes with a young Brooklyn couple, documentarian Jamie (Adam Driver) and wife Darby (Amanda Seyfried). This is a satire of an entire class of narcissists (the director included). In denial about his fading eyesight, Josh will discover that being foolish and confounded is good for his system. By the time Cornelia and Josh have woken from their spell, they’ve absorbed the movie’s best gag and fundamental irony: Accepting that you’re old takes no less imagination than pretending you’re young. R. BRIAN MILLER. Ceday Hills, Cinema 21, Hollywood.
Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
IT’S NOT A TRUMER! YOUR GUIDE TO SCHWARZENEGGERIAN BEER PAIRINGS. BY A P KRYZA
apkryza@wweek.com
We’ve reached a magnificent time when film houses with beer outnumber those without. Naturally, the art of curating perfect beer and movie pairings follows. This Friday, Laurelhurst Theater will pair a coveted barrel of Ninkasi’s new Ground Control Imperial Stout—made with yeast that was shot into space—with Paul Verhoeven’s batshit Arnold Schwarzenegger sci-fi opus, Total Recall (Laurelhurst Theater, April 17-23). ). Space yeast alone would make the match perfect. And at 10 percent ABV, it’ll have you asking, “If I’m not me, den who de hell am I?” in no time. The screening isn’t just a great excuse to get drunk and giggle over three-breasted hookers. It inspired us to pair these other Arnold classics with beer: The Terminator (1984) Beer pairing: McMenamins’ Terminator Stout Tasting notes: Like the titular killing machine, it’s dark, strong, full-bodied and devoid of personality. Commando (1985) Beer pairing: Stone Vanilla Porter and a shot of New Deal Portland 88 vodka Tasting notes: Vanilla porter represents the opening, when Arnold’s John Matrix lived a peaceful life eating vanilla ice cream and hand-feeding baby deer. The Portland 88 represents the 88 people killed before the credits roll. Predator (1987) Beer pairing: Hopworks Survival Stout Tasting notes: It’s made with ancient grains the brewery claims help humans survive, which the beefcakes in this movie could have used before getting gutted by the intergalactic trophy hunter. Kindergarten Cop (1990) Beer pairing: Fort George’s Quick Wit Tasting notes: The third-best movie ever shot in Astoria (what up, Short Circuit and The Goonies?)
gets paired with the city’s best brewery. Like detective John Kimble’s candor with the children it’s unfiltered, fairly light, and also crisp, which is the surname of the man Arnold kills in front of his own son in a school lavatory during the touching finale. Batman & Robin (1997) Beer pairing: Ice House Tasting notes: The movie is so shitty you can’t take your eyes off it. The beer is so shitty, but you can’t stop drinking it, because you bought 30 cans and are too stubborn to admit defeat. The Expendables Series (2010-2014) pairing A great beer that you forgot in your Beer pairing: cellar or car for 10 years. It’s aged horribly, but you still stubbornly drink because you know how good it used to be. Tasting notes: They made three?! ALSO SHOWING: Ed Wood—yep, that Ed Wood—in the 1969 equivalent of a Skinemax film, The Photographer (aka Love Feast). Joy Cinema. 9 pm Wednesday, April 15. Cinema Project hosts Berlin duo Ojoboca’s Horrorism for Beginners, Beginners for Horrorism, using damaged film to make you feel…scared and high? Clinton Street Theater. 7:30 pm Friday, April 17. Jane Fonda gets kinky in a space bikini in 1968’s ultra-camp classic Barbarella. Academy Theater. April 17-23. The Room star Greg Sestero will present his tell-all book and discuss James Franco’s adaptation. Cinema 21. 9:30 pm Friday, April 17. High Fidelity celebrates 15 years inspiring lonely nerds to convey their feelings through top-five lists and obscure B-sides. Kiggins Theatre. Opens Friday, April 17. Rock Out With Your VCR Out, features such terrors as goblins and Ted Nugent talking. Hollywood Theatre. 9:30 pm Saturday, April 18. Portland Geek Council brings back the Skeksis with Jim Henson’s hypnotic and beautiful The Dark Crystal. Clinton Street Theater. 2 pm Sunday, April 19. The Portland Opera presents the 1936 MGM extravaganza Show Boat in advance of the company’s stage adaptation in May. Hollywood Theatre. 7 pm Sunday, April 19. Repressed Cinema is set to jangle spurs with the exploitation Western The Female Bunch. Hollywood Theatre. 7:30 pm Tuesday, April 21.
MOVIES
COURTESY OF TOUCHSTONE PICTURES
APRIL 17–23
GET TOP 5 MUSICAL CRIMES: High Fidelity opens April 17 at the Kiggins Theatre.
Regal Lloyd Center 10 & IMAX
1510 N.E. Multnomah St. PAUL BLART: MALL COP 2 Fri-Sat-Sun 11:40, 02:10, 04:40, 07:10, 09:40 TCM PRESENTS: THE SOUND OF MUSIC 50TH ANNIVERSARY Sun-Wed 07:00 FRIDAY 20TH ANNIVERSARY Mon 07:30 MONKEY KINGDOM Tue 10:00, 12:30
Bagdad Theater
3702 S.E. Hawthorne Blvd., 503-249-7474 FURIOUS 7 Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 12:20, 03:30, 07:00, 10:20
Cinema 21
616 N.W. 21st Ave., 503-223-4515 WHILE WE’RE YOUNG Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:30, 07:00, 09:15 WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:15, 08:45 IT FOLLOWS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 06:45
Clinton Street Theater
2522 S.E. Clinton St., 503-238-8899 NO FILMS SHOWING TODAY Fri-Mon THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW Sat 12:00 SALAD DAYS: A DECADE OF PUNK IN WASHINGTON, DC (1980-90) Sat 05:00, 07:00, 09:00 THE DARK CRYSTAL Sun 02:00 BROTHER OUTSIDER: THE LIFE OF BAYARD RUSTIN Sun 07:00 A KISS FOR GABRIELA Tue 07:00 CAM GIRLZ Wed 07:00 SONG FROM THE FOREST
Laurelhurst Theatre & Pub
2735 E. Burnside St., 503-232-5511 THE IMITATION GAME FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:00 AMERICAN SNIPER Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 06:30 WHIPLASH FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 06:45, 09:05 A GIRL WALKS HOME ALONE AT NIGHT Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 09:35 BIRDMAN OR (THE UNEXPECTED VIRTUE OF IGNORANCE) Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 09:15 TOTAL RECALL Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 09:45 THE THEORY OF EVERYTHING Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 07:10 SONG OF THE SEA Fri-Sat-Sun 01:40, 04:30 SELMA SatSun 01:15
Mission Theater and Pub
1624 NW Glisan, THE SPONGEBOB MOVIE: SPONGE OUT OF WATER Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:30 AMERICAN SNIPER Fri-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:50 CHAPPIE Sat-Sun 02:30 INSPIRED TO RIDE Sat 07:00
Moreland Theatre
6712 S.E. Milwaukie Ave., 503-236-5257 WOMAN IN GOLD Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:30, 08:00
St. Johns Cinemas
8704 N. Lombard St., 503-286-1768 FURIOUS 7 Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 04:00, 07:00, 10:00 WOMAN IN GOLD Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 05:20, 07:40, 09:50
CineMagic Theatre
2021 S.E. Hawthorne Blvd., 503-231-7919 WOMAN IN GOLD Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:30, 08:00
Kiggins Theatre
1011 Main St., 360-816-0352 HIGH FIDELITY Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue 05:00, 07:30 SET FIRE TO THE STARS Fri-Sat-Sun 02:00
Century 16 Eastport Plaza
4040 S.E. 82nd Ave., FIFTY SHADES OF GREY Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:00 MONKEY KINGDOM Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:00, 01:15, 03:30, 05:45, 08:00, 10:15 CINDERELLA Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:00, 01:50, 04:40, 07:30, 10:20 THE DIVERGENT SERIES: INSURGENT FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:55, 07:10, 10:10 THE DIVERGENT SERIES: INSURGENT 3D Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:05 HOME Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 11:10, 01:40, 03:00, 04:20, 07:05, 08:05, 09:40, 10:30 HOME 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 12:30, 05:40 GET HARD Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 11:50, 01:05, 02:25, 03:40, 05:05, 06:20, 07:35, 09:05, 10:15 FURIOUS 7 Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:40, 12:45, 01:45, 02:55, 04:00, 05:05, 06:10, 07:15, 08:20, 09:25, 10:30 THE LONGEST RIDE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:40, 03:50, 06:55, 10:05 UNFRIENDED Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:15, 01:30, 03:45, 06:00, 08:15, 10:30 PAUL BLART: MALL COP
2 Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 11:45, 02:30, 05:15, 07:45, 10:20 TRUE STORY Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 11:30, 02:15, 05:00, 07:40, 10:25 TWENTY Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 01:00, 04:00, 07:00, 10:00 TCM PRESENTS: THE SOUND OF MUSIC 50TH ANNIVERSARY Sun-Wed 02:00, 07:00 FRIDAY 20TH ANNIVERSARY Mon 07:30
Kennedy School Theater
5736 N.E. 33rd Ave., 503-249-7474 CHAPPIE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon 02:30 THE SPONGEBOB MOVIE: SPONGE OUT OF WATER Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 05:30 AMERICAN SNIPER Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:45
Empirical Theatre at OMSI
1945 S.E. Water Ave., 503-797-4000 WALKING WITH DINOSAURS 3D Fri 02:00 SECRET OCEAN Fri-SatSun 11:00 JOURNEY TO SPACE Fri-Sat-Sun 10:00 FLIGHT OF THE BUTTERFLIES Fri 11:00 GALAXY QUEST Fri-Sun 01:45 STAR TREK II: THE WRATH OF KHAN Fri-Sun 03:45 PLANET OF THE APES Fri-Sat 03:45 12 MONKEYS Fri 10:30 THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL Sat 12:00 THE LAST STARFIGHTER Sat 01:45 THE MATRIX Sat 05:45 CHILDREN OF MEN Sat 08:30 BLADE RUNNER: THE FINAL CUT Sat 10:30 FORBIDDEN PLANET Sun 12:00 ALIEN Sun 05:45 SERENITY Sun 08:00
Fifth Avenue Cinema 510 S.W. Hall St., 503-725-3551 HADEWIJCH Fri-SatSun 03:00 NO FILMS SHOWING TODAY MonTue-Wed
Hollywood Theatre
4122 NE Sandy Blvd., 503-281-4215 WHILE WE’RE YOUNG Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 07:00, 09:15 BLADE RUNNER Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 09:30 IT FOLLOWS Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 07:15 KUMIKO, THE TREASURE HUNTER Fri-Sat-Sun 02:30, 04:35 GRIDLORDS Fri 09:45 LE WEEK-END Sat 02:30 ROCK OUT WITH YOUR VCR OUT Sat 09:30 SHOW BOAT Sun 07:00 THE NICHOLAS BROTHERS: HOT IN HARLEM Mon 07:30 MACUNAIMA Mon 09:30 THE FEMALE BUNCH Tue 07:30 BATTLESTAR GALACTICA Wed 07:30 THE SECRET LIFE OF PLANTS
BREAKING
NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium
NEWS FIRST
St. Johns Theater
FOLLOW @WWE E K
1219 S.W. Park Ave., 503-221-1156 AN EVENING WITH KELLY SEARS Fri 07:00 BELLE AND SEBASTIAN Sat-Sun 04:30, 07:00 NO FILMS SHOWING TODAY Mon-TueWed MALA NOCHE 8203 N. Ivanhoe, 503-249-7474-6 HOME Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 01:00, 04:00, 07:00, 09:45
ON T WIT TER
Century 16 Cedar Hills
3200 S.W. Hocken Ave., MONKEY KINGDOM FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 10:55, 01:10, 03:25, 05:40, 07:55, 10:10 CINDERELLA Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:05, 01:50, 04:35, 07:20, 10:05 THE DIVERGENT SERIES: INSURGENT FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:10, 02:00, 04:50, 07:40, 10:30 HOME Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 10:55, 12:05, 01:20, 02:35, 05:05, 07:35, 10:05 GET HARD Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:30 FURIOUS 7 Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:05, 12:40, 02:15, 03:50, 05:25, 07:05, 08:35, 10:15 WHILE WE’RE YOUNG Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:05, 02:30, 05:00, 07:25, 10:00 DANNY COLLINS Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 06:15, 09:00 WOMAN IN GOLD Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:05, 01:45, 04:25, 07:05, 09:45 THE LONGEST RIDE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:30, 04:30, 07:30, 10:30 UNFRIENDED Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:00, 01:15, 03:30, 05:45, 08:00, 10:15 CHILD 44 Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 12:30, 03:55, 07:10, 10:20 PAUL BLART: MALL COP 2 Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:00, 12:00, 02:25, 03:50, 04:50, 07:15, 09:40 TRUE STORY FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:00, 01:50, 04:40, 07:30, 10:20 OK KANMANI FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:30, 03:45, 06:45, 09:50 TCM PRESENTS: THE SOUND OF MUSIC 50TH ANNIVERSARY Sun-Wed 02:00, 07:00 FRIDAY 20TH ANNIVERSARY Mon 07:30 THE AGE OF ADALINE
SUBJECT TO CHANGE. CALL THEATERS OR VISIT WWEEK.COM/MOVIETIMES FOR THE MOST UP-TODATE INFORMATION FRIDAY-THURSDAY, APRIL 17-23, UNLESS OTHERWISE INDICATED
Tickets On Sale Now! Willamette Week APRIL 15, 2015 wweek.com
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JAMES REXROAD
END ROLL
GLASS AND PINT GLASSES: Dawn Hargrove and “Hillbilly” Jeff Toates show their wares.
TWO GREAT TASTES When people walk into Hillbilly’s in Montavilla, they just can’t believe it exists. It probably makes too much sense to seem real: a beer-growler bar and head shop separated only by a little door next to the tap handles. The shared patio offers the promise of a fine Saturday of back-porch Portland living. It’s also quite possibly Oregon’s first growler-slash-head shop. (Believe it or not, Greenville, S.C., and Lynnwood, Wash., also have them.) “They say they didn’t think we could do that,” says Hillbilly’s co-owner Dawn Hargrove. “That’s where we get the cool factor.” Hillbilly’s won’t be confused for one of the sleek new weed shops popping up in the Pearl and inner Southeast—it’s a rough-hewn space with pot magazines by the door. The 11 taps play host to a rotating cast of all-local ciders and beers ($10-$14 for a 64-ounce growler, or $3-$4 a pint), while the glass shop’s wares range from vape pens to a goofball array of hand pipes and bubblers made mostly by local artists, with stems shaped like a swirling snake or bowls made to look like a blood-red skull. Hargrove and partner Jeff Toates, both in their early 50s, are medical-marijuana patients, and they’d always wanted to start their own glass shop and marijuana lounge. But in a business
location that might as well come with an expiration stamp—hosting a procession of tattoo shops and cafes, a barbecue pit and a chiropractor—they were in danger of losing their dream after just six months. With business slow, they decided to diversify their portfolio with a tavern license. “Jeff and his buddies are really big on the beer,” Hargrove says, “so he decided to bring it in.” Toates had also helped open the original incarnation of St. Johns stoner beer bar Plew’s Brews. Hargrove built a growler station, with bar stools that adjust up and down like barber’s chairs. “We didn’t have money to get advertising,” she says. “We were hoping the locals would find us.” They did. Hillbilly’s can now pay its bills, and Hargrove and Toates eventually hope to open a second shop in their home neighborhood of St. Johns. Although the glass and growler shops are technically separate, a lot of people make use of both. “I carry papers, so they’ll want papers,” Hargrove says. “After we close [the glass shop] at 7, you come in through the back.” ROBERTO JAMÓN. GO: Hillbilly’s, 7631 NE Glisan St., 719-6383, hillbillysherbsandglass.com. 11 am-11 pm Monday-Saturday, 11 am-3 pm Sunday. Glass shop closes at 7 pm.
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INTERNATIONAL MIDWIVES MONTH FUNDRAISER FOR THE ICTC Celebrate with a special screening of “Bringin’ In Da Spirit,” an evocative and passionate documentary that celebrates the history of the Black midwives who committed themselves to holistic answers in the face of powerful misconceptions about the practice of midwifery by Western medicine. Narrated by Phylicia Rashad, this film won the Paul Robeson Award Initiative Special Prize, FESPACO, Burkina Faso, 2005. After the film, Shafia Monroe will moderate a panel discussion with Pastor E.d. Mondiane, Mariah Taylor and Willie Poinsette with reflections and stories about the midwives in their lives, followed by refreshments and socializing . Suggested Donation: $25 at www.ictcmidwives.org Registration Closes April 28th. RSVP Today! Registration available at https://adobeformscentral.com/?f=tFSU83%2AVjpJDC Wk6shd1SA#
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What’s up gals and dudes! Goffy here, makin my debut on the adoption scene fully stoked to make your life even more amazing. Just imagine being met with this big ol goofy Goffy grin each day. I’m the kind of guy who is ALWAYS happy to see you and will never turn down a good belly rub or scratch behind the ears or most especially the opportunity to make you smile just as big as me. I am a 2 year old Pit Bull who
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Systems of a Down--this is how things work. 64 Spread out 65 Major in astronomy? 66 “American Horror Story” actress Lily 67 “My Dinner with ___” 68 Apple chemical banned in the 1980s 69 1990s puzzle game set in an island world 70 2008 World Series runner-ups
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Across 1 “I don’t give ___!” 5 Quad quarters 9 “___ American Life” 13 Twinkie filling 14 “Point taken” 15 Part of NASCAR 16 Dry 17 Agreement 18 2001 Microsoft debut 19 Star of the most recent Academy Award winner for Best Picture 21 “With parsley,” on French menus 23 Brokerage firm
Alexander 46 “Oh, but you must!” 48 Secretive U.S. govt. group 49 Employer of Agts. Mulder and Scully 52 Pea holder 53 Bills, later on 55 Just barely enough signal, on some phones 57 “Battlestar Galactica” baddie 58 Lump 59 Team-based pub offering 62 No-private matter?
with “talking baby” ads 24 “Lawrence of Arabia,” e.g. 25 Cup holder? 28 Love sickness? 29 Heavenly sphere 31 Procure 33 Central Internet computer 36 One of Tony’s confidants on “The Sopranos” 37 Molecular matter 39 Being broadcast 41 Cacophonies 42 “Amelie” star Audrey 44 “Thor” actress
Down 1 “Arrested Development” star Will 2 That little “ding” when you get a treat? 3 “... ___ man with seven wives” 4 Febreze target, sometimes 5 Chip’s target 6 “August: ___ County” (2013 Streep film) 7 Newsy summaries 8 Where measurement offenders may be sent? 9 Coach for hire 10 Action center 11 Judge Lance of the O.J. Simpson case 12 “Red” or “White” team 13 Green vegetables, casually 20 Device that utters “Um, step away from the car, maybe?” 22 Final Four initials 25 Someone who thinks exactly the same way you do?
26 Make a shambles of 27 Impersonates 30 “Argo” star Affleck 32 Fashion designer Gernreich 34 911 respondents 35 Sovereignty, in India 37 “Take ___ from me” 38 Singer Cruz 40 “At Seventeen” singer Janis 43 Covered with grease 45 1920 Preakness and Belmont winner 47 Kind of mirror or street 50 Farm equipment 51 “Fame” singer/ actress Cara 54 Nose-in-the-air types 56 “Absolutely Fabulous” mom 57 Alexander I, for one 59 Sine ___ non 60 Address on a business card 61 “Rhythm ___ Dancer” (Snap! single) 63 Rent out
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Week of April 16
ARIES (March 21-April 19): The California Gold Rush hit its peak between 1849 and 1855. Three hundred thousand adventurers flocked to America’s West Coast in search of gold. In the early days, gold nuggets were lying around on the ground in plain sight, or relatively easy to find in gravel beds at the bottom of streams. But later prospectors had to work harder, developing methods to extract the gold from rocks that contained it. One way to detect the presence of the precious metal was through the use of nitric acid, which corroded any substance that wasn’t gold. The term “acid test” refers to that process. I bring this to your attention, Aries, because it’s a good time for you to use the metaphorical version of an acid test as you ascertain whether what you have discovered is truly golden. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): The time between now and your birthday will provide you with excellent opportunities to resolve lingering problems, bring drawn-out melodramas to a conclusion, and clean up old messes -- even the supposedly interesting ones. You want to know what else this upcoming period will be good for? I’ll tell you: 1. Surrendering control-freak fantasies. 2. Relieving your backlog of tension. 3. Expelling delusional fears that you cling to out of habit. 4. Laughing long and hard at the cosmic jokes that have tweaked your attitude. GEMINI (May 21-June 20): In the mid-19th century, the entrance exam for the British Royal Navy was quite odd. Some candidates were required to write down the Lord’s Prayer, recite the multiplication table for the number three, get naked and jump over a chair, and drink a glass of sherry. I’m guessing that your own initiation or rite of passage may, at least initially, seem as puzzling or nonsensical as that one. You might be hard-pressed to understand how it is pertinent to the next chapter of your life story. And yet I suspect that you will ultimately come to the conclusion -- although it may take some time -- that this transition was an excellent lead-in and preparation for what’s to come. CANCER (June 21-July 22): In 1909, Sergei Diaghilev founded the Ballets Russes, a Parisian ballet company that ultimately revolutionized the art form. The collaborative efforts he catalyzed were unprecedented. He drew on the talents of visual artists Picasso and Matisse, composers Stravinsky and Debussy, designer Coco Chanel, and playwright Jean Cocteau, teaming them up with top choreographers and dancers. His main goal was not primarily to entertain, but rather to excite and inspire and inflame. That’s the spirit I think you’ll thrive on in the coming weeks, Cancerian. It’s not a time for nice diversions and comfy satisfactions. Go in quest of Ballets Russes-like bouts of arousal, awakening, and delight. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): “Don’t ever tame your demons -- always keep them on a leash.” That’s a line from a song by Irish rock musician Hozier. Does it have any meaning for you? Can your personal demons somehow prove useful to you if you keep them wild but under your control? If so, how exactly might they be useful? Could they provide you with primal energy you wouldn’t otherwise possess? Might their presence be a reminder of the fact that everyone you meet has their own demons and therefore deserves your compassion? I suspect that these are topics worthy of your consideration right now. Your relationship to your demons is ripe for transformation -- possibly even a significant upgrade. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Will you be the difficult wizard, Virgo? Please say yes. Use your magic to summon elemental forces that will shatter the popular obstacles. Offer the tart medicine that tempers and tests as it heals. Bring us bracing revelations that provoke a fresher, sweeter order. I know it’s a lot to ask, but right now there’s no one more suited to the tasks. Only you can manage the stern grace that will keep us honest. Only you have the tough humility necessary to solve the riddles that no one else can even make sense of. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): My message this week might be controversial to the Buddhists among you. But I’ve got to report the cosmic trends as I see them,
right? It’s my sacred duty not to censor or sanitize the raw data. So here’s the truth as I understand it: More desire is the answer to your pressing questions. Passionate intensity is the remedy for all wishy-washy wishes and anesthetized emotions. The stronger your longing, the smarter you’ll be. So if your libido is not already surging and throbbing under its own power, I suggest you get it teased and tantalized until it does. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Karelu is a word from the Tulu language that’s spoken in South India. It refers to the marks made on human skin by clothing that’s too tight. As you know, the effect is temporary. Once the close-fitting garment is removed, the imprint will eventually disappear as the skin restores its normal shape and texture. I see the coming days as being a time when you will experience a metaphorical version of karelu, Scorpio. You will shed some form of constriction, and it may take a while for you to regain your full flexibility and smoothness. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Georgia is not just an American state. It’s also a country that’s at the border of Western Asia and Eastern Europe. Many people who live there speak the Georgian language. They have a word, shemomedjamo, that refers to what happens when you love the taste of the food you’re eating so much that you continue to pile it in your mouth well past the time when you’re full. I’d like to use it as a metaphor for what I hope you won’t do in the coming days: get too much of a good thing. On the other hand, it’s perfectly fine to get just the right, healthy amount of a good thing.
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CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): When you’re a driver in a car race, an essential rule in making a successful pit stop is to get back on the track as quickly as possible. Once the refueling is finished and your new tires are in place, you don’t want to be cleaning out your cup holder or checking the side-view mirror to see how you look. Do I really need to tell you this? Aren’t you usually the zodiac’s smartest competitor? I understand that you’re trying to become more skilled at the arts of relaxation, but can’t you postpone that until after this particular race is over? Remember that there’s a difference between the bad kind of stress and the good kind. I think you actually need some of the latter. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Until the early 20th century, mayonnaise was considered a luxury food, a hand-made delicacy reserved for the rich. An entrepreneur named Richard Hellman changed that. He developed an efficient system to produce and distribute the condiment at a lower cost. He put together effective advertising campaigns. The increasing availability of refrigeration helped, too, making mayonnaise a more practical food. I foresee the possibility of a comparable evolution in your own sphere, Aquarius: the transformation of a specialty item into a mainstay, or the evolution of a rare pleasure into a regular occurrence. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Piscean author Dr. Seuss wrote and illustrated over 40 books for children. Midway through his career, his publisher dared him to make a new book that used no more than 50 different words. Accepting the challenge, Seuss produced Green Eggs and Ham, which went on to become the fourth best-selling English-language children’s book in history. I invite you to learn from Seuss’s efforts, Pisces. How? Take advantage of the limitations that life has given you. Be grateful for the way those limitations compel you to be efficient and precise. Use your constraints as inspiration to create a valuable addition to your life story.
Homework When was the last time you loved yourself with consummate artfulness and grace? Testify at FreeWillAstrology.com.
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