42 39 willamette week, july 27, 2016 by Willamette Week Newspaper

YOU CAN’T SUE BIKETOWN.

P. 9

WHEN THIS WAS POLO TOWN U.S.A. PORTLAND’S BEST HAWAIIAN SHAVE ICE. P. 51

“MOST TIMBERS GAMES REMIND ME OF PRESCHOOL NAP TIME.”

WILLAMETTE WEEK PORTLAND’S NEWSWEEKLY

BY LE AH S OT T I LE

Devontre Thomas is 19. In a few weeks, he goes on trial in federal court in Portland. If he loses, he could go to prison for a year. For possessing an amount of cannabis that would fill one joint.

P. 51

How could this happen in Oregon? Pa g e 1 2

WWEEK.COM

VOL 42/39 7. 27. 2016

P. 25

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

CLIFFORD KING

FINDINGS

PAGE 37

WHAT WE LEARNED FROM READING THIS WEEK’S PAPER VOL. 42, ISSUE 39.

Moe Tonkon was the Jackie Robinson of Portland’s snootiest social clubs. 4

There was a hearty “fuck the police” chant at Portland’s biggest all-ages music festival. 37

The leader of a tenants’ rights group says Mayor Charlie Hales said it would be “fine” for homeless campers to sleep in his yard. 6

Backyard chickens might be contributing to rat problems. 45

Weezer is still alive, and made a White Album to go with their Blue and Green albums. 29

ON THE COVER:

If you like Bill Murray movies, it’s your lucky week. 49 The Timbers Army borrowed many of its famous chants from another local team. 51

OUR MOST TRAFFICKED STORY ONLINE THIS WEEK:

Photo by Julie Showers.

Someone slashed the tires of BikeTown whips in North Portland.

STAFF Editor & Publisher Mark Zusman EDITORIAL News Editor Aaron Mesh Arts & Culture Editor Martin Cizmar Staff Writers Nigel Jaquiss, Rachel Monahan, Beth Slovic Copy Chief Rob Fernas Copy Editors Matt Buckingham, Maya McOmie Stage & Screen Editor Enid Spitz Projects Editor Matthew Korfhage Music Editor Matthew Singer Web Editor Sophia June Books James Helmsworth

Visual Arts Jennifer Rabin Editorial Interns Johanna Bernhard, Julia Comnes, Grace Culhane, Ellena Rosenthal, Ben Stone CONTRIBUTORS Mike Acker, Dave Cantor, Nathan Carson, Peter D’Auria, Alex Falcone, Shannon Gormley, Jordan Green, Jay Horton, AP Kryza, John Locanthi, Mark Stock PRODUCTION Production Manager Dylan Serkin Art Director Julie Showers Special Sections Art Director Alyssa Walker Graphic Designers Rick Vodicka, Xel Moore Illustration and Design Interns Jodie Beechem, Karalie Juraska Photography Interns Megan Nanna, Clifford King

Our mission: Provide Portlanders with an independent and irreverent understanding of how their worlds work so they can make a difference.

Willamette Week is published weekly by

Though Willamette Week is free, please take just one copy. Anyone removing papers in bulk from our distribution points will be prosecuted, as they say, to the full extent of the law.

Main line phone: (503) 243-2122 fax: (503) 243-1115

City of Roses Media Company 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210.

Classifieds phone: (503) 223-1500 fax: (503) 223-0388

ADVERTISING Director of Advertising Iris Meyers Display Account Executives Michael Donhowe, Kevin Friedman, Bruce Greif, Rich Hunter, Sarah Mason, Kyle Owens, Matt Plambeck, Sharri Regan Classifieds Account Executive Matt Plambeck Advertising Coordinator Alie Kilts

MUSICFESTNW Operations Director Matt Manza General Manager Jane Smith

COMMUNITY OUTREACH Marketing & Events Manager Steph Barnhart Give!Guide Director Nick Johnson

OPERATIONS Accounting Manager Chris Petryszak Credit Manager Shawn Wolf AR/Credit Assistant Kristina Woodard Accounting Assistant Kelsey Young Associate Publisher Jane Smith

DISTRIBUTION Circulation Director Spencer Winans WWEEK.COM Web Production Brian Panganiban

Willamette Week welcomes freelance submissions. Send material to either News Editor or Arts Editor. Manuscripts will be returned if you include a self-addressed, stamped envelope. To be considered for calendar listings, notice of events must be received in writing by noon Wednesday, two weeks before publication. Send to Calendar Editor. Photographs should be clearly labeled and will be returned if accompanied by a self-addressed, stamped envelope. Questions concerning circulation or subscription inquiries should be directed to Spencer Winans at Willamette Week. Postmaster: Send all address changes to Willamette Week, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Subscription rates: One year $100, six months $50. Back issues $5 for walk-ins, $8 for mailed requests when available.

Willamette Week is mailed at third-class rates. Association of Alternative Newsmedia. This newspaper is published on recycled newsprint using soy-based ink.

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

LAW PROTECTING MURALS

Never let anyone paint a mural on your building—you may be permanently giving away your right to do what you want with the property [“Up Against the Wall,” WW, July 20, 2016]. Frankly, that’s nuts. If you want legal ownership of your own painting, paint it on some material that you own. Now, was that so difficult? —Todd Mecklem WILLAMETTE WEEK

at Oregon Convention Center Thursday 11–6 | Friday & Saturday 10–6 Sunday 10–4 FREE Admission

P. 44

AUGUST 4–7

“THE CHANDELIER IS MADE OF BATS!”

NATIONAL STAMPSHOW

Some building owners are willing to give up those rights to support artists and expand public art in our city—good on them. If all art is painted “on material that you own,” art would remain locked away in galleries and museums. Murals bring art to the masses, they make us think, they bring joy and beauty into public spaces. Also, as the article pointed out, murals do get destroyed when ownership changes, or when building renovations occur, so obviously the law isn’t even doing a strong job of protecting murals in the first place. —“Habeas Porpoise”

VOL 42/38 07.20.2016

stamps.org/StampShow

Thank You Portland!

Winner Best Budtender Emma Chasen/Farma

I have no faith that Portland Public Schools can function, no matter how much money it has [“Flushed,” WW, July 20, 2016]. It is incompetent and has no credibility. I used to believe in public education, but after living in Portland I don’t anymore. This is a small district with common challenges as compared to real U.S. cities. It shouldn’t be this hard. PPS is incapable of making it work. I will not vote to give another nickel to PPS. Total idiocy and corruption. —“Links”

PROPOSED TAX ON CORPORATIONS

It isn’t surprising that corporations are circling their wagons; Oregon has the lowest cor-

Winner Best Cannabis Farm Newcleus Nurseries

Farma 916 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Do not operate a vehicle or machinery under the influence of marijuana. Keep marijuana out of the reach of children. 4

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

HOW MUCH DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THE GRATEFUL DEAD IN OREGON?

BY ENID SPITZ

“Obviously the law isn’t doing a strong job of protecting murals in the ﬁrst place.”

Best of Portland 2016 Winner Best Organic Cannabis Selection “Farma ... is what the future of boutique cannabis will look like.”- WWeek 7.13.16

LEAD SINKS THE WE GOT A SUPERINTENDENT PIKACHU, AND YOU CAN TOO.

T H I S B L AC K L I V E S M AT T ER MURAL IS UNDER THREAT. CAN FEDERAL LAW SAVE IT?

REPORT ON PPS FAILURES Auctions • Postal History Exhibition New Stamp Issues • Stamp Dealers Free Stamp Collection Evaluations Stamp Designers • History Seminars

porate taxes in the U.S., and corporations want to keep it that way [“Money Talks Tough,” WW, July 27, 2016]. Our schools are underfunded and many of our citizens have unmet health care needs—yet these corporations fail to acknowledge their responsibility to the communities around them. The fact that corporations are leaning on the nonprofits they donate to by trying to silence their support for Measure 97 is indicative of the situation. Oregonians deserve better. I’m looking forward to this measure passing, for everyone’s sake. —Hazel M. Wheeler

Is it true that the Multnomah Athletic Club did not allow Jews to become members until the 1970s? —Jim W.

Ah, the good old days! I’m not naming names, Jim, but when certain white (and/or orange) people talk about how great America used to be (and could be again!), the casually racist nation you’re describing is at least part of what they’re talking about. There’s no reason to heap any particular discredit on the MAC, however—up until the 1960s or so, membership in exclusive social or athletic clubs was routinely closed to Jews, AfricanAmericans and women. If anything, the MAC deserves some props— it opened its doors to Jews in 1958. That’s a full 11 years before Portland’s Arlington Club and University Club—no doubt moved to regretful

CORRECTIONS

Last week’s cover story, “Up Against the Wall,” reported that Ashley Montague would paint a James Chasse Jr. memorial mural on Cinema 21 in Northwest Portland. After press deadlines, that plan changed. Montague left the project and its planner, Jason Renaud, who produced a documentary about Chasse in 2013, says he does not know whether he will go forward with the project.

Nine men—eight whites and one Latino—have been shot and killed by Portland police since 2012, according to Portland Copwatch. Last week’s Dr. Know column had an incorrect total of eight. The Best of Portland Readers’ Poll that ran July 13 contained incorrect and missing information. Dr. David Naimon, runner-up for best naturopath, is at 2700 SE 26th Ave. (503-234-6556); Between the Covers, runner-up for best podcast, is at tinyurl.com/btcpodcast; Gladys Bikes, third place for best bike shop, is at 2905 NE Alberta St. (971-373-8388); and Naked City Clothing, third place for best window display, is at 2701 SE Belmont St. (503-239-3837, nakedcityclothing. com). WW regrets the errors. LETTERS TO THE EDITOR must include the author’s street address and phone number for veriﬁcation. Letters must be 250 or fewer words. Submit to: 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: mzusman@wweek.com.

tears by the Beatles’ “All You Need Is Love”— suspended their gentiles-only policies, in 1969. Waverley Country Club, with its even higher concentration of Blue Meanies, took all the way until 1972 to follow suit. Incidentally, each of these latter clubs—the Arlington, the University, and the Waverley—had its l’chaimen broken by the same guy: lawyer Moe Tonkon, founding partner of white-shoe Portland law firm Tonkon Torp LLP. Tonkon was the first Jewish member of all three groups, making him pretty much the Jackie Robinson of the Portland anti-Semitic social-club scene. One might assume this kind of discrimination is ancient history, but there are country clubs that exclude Jews to this day. (Try—surprise!— Florida.) If a club is small enough, is private enough, and has few dealings with the general public, the courts have held that it has the right to “freedom of association.” Ironically, the more snobbish the club, the easier it is to get away with bigotry. Clubs that accept pretty much everyone except minorities are likely to be judged illegally discriminatory. Those who turn down plenty of WASPs as well, though, are merely discriminating. Either way, it’s a shame Moe Tonkon, who died in 1984, isn’t around to punch the lot of them in the mouth. QUESTIONS? Send them to dr.know@wweek.com

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

426 SE GRAND AVE. PORTLAND, OR. 97214 NEXTADVENTURE.NET 503.233.0706

MURMURS

Items Under $20

BUY OF tHe WeeK

sAVe 38%

sAVe 20%

COMPARE AT: $7.99

$599

sAVe 76%

$1999

sAVe 60%

COMPARE AT: $24.99

$499

LIST PRICE: $49.99

COMPARE AT: $19.99

sAVe 75% Next Adventure Disc Golf Towel

Soybu and Tulah Activewear 20% Off!

sAVe UP tO 50%

$599-$899

Several styles and prints!

$8999

$4999

COMPARE AT: $189.00

COMPARE AT: $89.99

Windproof, zip-up hoodie for morning cragging or casual evenings downtown!

a reinforced seat and knees!

$29

COMPARE AT: $89.99

sAVe 67% Monviso 38L Day Pack

OK this one’s even bigger, you know what to use it for!

$7999

sAVe 53%

COMPARE AT: $169.99

$1999

$2499

sAVe 50%

sAVe 71%

sAVe 69%

COMPARE AT: $69.99

Great Canyon 32L Pack

sAVe 50%

Great for that short trip to the woods or just around town.

$39

$74

sAVe 60%

sAVe 42%

COMPARE AT: $59.99

sAVe 50%

Wilderness Technology Crag 45

COMPARE AT: $199.99

Great four-person tent for nice weekends at the lake.

$1999

LIST PRICE: $169.99

$9999

Wilderness Technology Quad Tent

From the valleys to the crags, this sleek pack will get you out without breaking the bank!

$8499

sAVe 50%

Great for a little longer trip to the mountain.

COMPARE AT: $129.99

And bigger.

$2999

Monviso 28L Day Pack

Great Canyon 42L Pack

And we just keep getting bigger.

COMPARE AT: $79.99

Monviso 18L Day Pack

COMPARE AT: $99.99

sAVe 60%

Moisture wicking, UPF 30+ sun shirt!

$1999

COMPARE AT: $89.99

Women’s White Sierra Sunbuster Tee

Moisture wicking, UPF 30+ sun shirt!

Comes in 4 colors. Boys and Girls!

$34

sAVe 56%

Men’s White Sierra Kalgoorlie Short Sleeve Shirt

Men’s Black Diamond Junior Red Ledge Thunderlight Castleton Pant Durable climbing pants with Rain Jacket

Women’s Black Diamond Coalesce Hoody

COMPARE AT: $45.00

sAVe 45%

LIST PRICE: $40.00

sAVe 44%

sAVe 52%

$1999

COMPARE AT: $55.00

Great merino-blend tops and bottoms, lightweight and perfect for summer.

Croakies!!!

2 lights, 5 bucks, GET OUT!

$2999

COMPARE AT: $12.00

All Icebreaker Apparel 30% Off

Cute and comfy ladies wear at cuter prices.

Flipo Silicone Bike Lights

On Guard Pitbull Mini U-Lock

Next Adventure Pack Towel

Not just for discs!

sAVe 45%

COMPARE AT: $29.99

$5999

LIST PRICE: $110.00

sAVe 33% Wilderness Technology Trio Tent

Great for that third wheel when they tag along.

$59

sAVe 45%

LIST PRICE: $110.00

Petroglyph 20 Degree Sleeping Bag Great bag for summer and fall.

$11

LIST PRICE: $13.00

Wigwam Cool Lite Hiker Pro Quarter

Women’s

2015 Model Closeout? Yes Please!

$174

sAVe 30%

LIST PRICE: $249.99

LIST PRICE: $25.00

$1,449

Astral Greenjacket PFD 2015 Green Color only.

Necky Eliza

2014 model, limited quantities.

Perception Pescador 80

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

sAVe 50%

Werner Amigo Paddles Blemish models.

$250

LIST PRICE: $5.00

sAVe 50%

Showers Pass Cloudcover Ipad Case Dry Doc Wallet

START YOUR ADVENTURE! 2.5 DAY CLASSES 6

LIST PRICE: $79.99

ssAVe sAV AVe AVe 46%

sAVe 54%

Also available for IPad Mini at $16.99.

$3999

LIST PRIC PRICE: $130.00

LIST PRICE: $49.99

LIST PRICE: $1,699.00

In stock only-without rudder.

$69

$2299

$1,09900

sAVe $600

Old Town Predator MX

Choose long or short sleeve.

LIST PRICE: $1,399.00

sAVe $400

Stohlquist P2 Rashguard

Touring or race SUP.

COMPARE AT: $499.99

LIST PRICE: $60.00

sAVe 78%

Bic C-TEC Tracer 12’6”

$999

LIST PRICE: $1,899.00

sAVe $450

Assorted wool 2-packs at prices that will make Deek cringe!

$299

$12

Lorpen Merino Hiker 2-Pack

sAVe 40%

Men’s

sAVe 52% Scarpa Reflex

Scarpa Reflex

Keep the mountain out of your boots!

MEGA DEAL!!!

sAVe 54%

Wilderness Technology Mountain Gaiter

Eureka Tetragon 5 Tent

Keep your ID, cash and other items dry.

SUMMER IS STILL HERE!

MTI BOB PFD Closeout models.

IF YOU HAVE A WEEKEND, YOU HAVE TIME TO START A NEW LIFESTYLE IN THE WET WORLD OF PADDLING. OUR PROGRESSION CLASSES INCLUDE A POOL SESSION AND TWO DAYS ON THE WATER TO GET YOU PADDLING WITH STYLE AND EASE! BEGINNER WHITEWATER CLASS AUGUST 5TH-7TH BEGINNER FLAT WATER CLASS AUGUST 12TH-14TH $240, THIS WEEK ONLY USE COUPON CODE: SUMMERADVENTURE FOR 15% SAVINGS ($36!)

Springwater Corridor Sweep Looks Like a Lawn Party

Portland Mayor Charlie Hales still plans to sweep as many as 500 homeless campers from the Springwater Corridor bike trail Aug. 1. But campers and advocates say they won’t leave quietly. Activist group Portland Tenants United says it will organize at least 100 homeless people to “resist” police sweeps along the trail. Other activists pledge to hold rallies at City Hall, create an “economic refugee camp” in another part of the city, and march homeless people into Hales’ neighborhood of Eastmoreland. During a July 25 meeting, activists asked Hales if campers could move into the mayor’s yard. Margot Black, an organizer with Portland Tenants United, recalls Hales’ answer: “‘My front yard will be ﬁne,’ he said.” Hales’ spokeswoman denies the mayor made any such oﬀer.

Portland Public Schools Delays Bond Measure

In an abrupt about-face, Portland Public Schools will wait until May 2017 to take its $750 million bond to voters. The School Board had been moving toward placing the bond—which would fund renovation of Lincoln, Benson and Madison high schools—on the November ballot. The sudden switch is further fallout from the scandal over lead in PPS water that resulted in Superintendent Carole Smith’s resignation after nearly nine years on the job (“Flushed,” WW, July 20, 2016). Board member Paul Anthony says he expects ﬁerce November opposition to all new taxes from foes of Measure 97, the statewide corporate tax measure. “I think a lot of people expect a sizable rebound eﬀect,” he says.

Tim Kaine Raises Dwight Holton’s Prospects

Hillary Clinton’s selection of U.S. Sen. Tim Kaine (D-Va.) as her vice presidential running mate could mean career advancement for a Portland power couple. Kaine is married to Anne Holton, sister of former acting U.S. Attorney for Oregon Dwight Holton, who ran unsuccessfully for Oregon attorney general in 2012. Dwight Holton, who now runs the Lines for Life substance-abuse-prevention nonproﬁt, is married to Mary Ellen Glynn, former spokeswoman for President Bill Clinton. Holton has long sought the U.S. Attorney W W S TA F F

oregon Brewers Fest BounD? gear up For a CItY aDVenture!

THOMAS TEAL

Deals gooD through 8/1

HOLTON

for Oregon post, but says he’s not thinking about his job prospects. “It’s the last thing on our minds,” he says. “We’re focused on doing everything we can to get Hillary and Tim elected.”

Portland Plotting to Boot Cars

These boots were made for locking! This week, the Portland City Council is scheduled to move forward with a plan to allow parkingmeter readers to put boots on cars that have numerous unpaid parking tickets, making them impossible to drive until owners agree to pay up. Transportation Commissioner Steve Novick, who backs the plan, says boots are cheaper than towing and impounding cars. “Towing,” says Novick, “imposes an unnecessary additional penalty, which obviously is especially burdensome for people with modest incomes.”

NEWS Tina Kotek’s Speech A n n o ta t e d

2. Kotek became speaker in 2013, after Democrats broke a 30-30 tie in the Oregon House. 4. While Clinton opposed same-sex marriage in 2008, she personally supported it in 2013 and called it a constitutional right in 2015.

5. Among the recent Oregon laws that provide a louder voice in government for minorities, one of the most significant is Oregon Motor Voter, which automatically registers Oregonians to vote when they go to replace, renew or apply for a driver’s license. It went into effect in January. 7. In July 2015, Brown signed a law requiring businesses with 10 or more employees to offer 40 hours of paid sick leave per year. 10. This line, like all of Kotek’s speech, is part of a weeklong effort by Democratic Party leaders to persuade supporters of U.S. Sen. Bernie Sanders (D-Vt.) that Clinton is sufficiently progressive. That mission become more urgent after leaked emails showed party leaders sabotaged Sanders’ campaign.

WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS WEEK

Conv ention Thinking

Oregon House Speaker Tina Kotek (D -Portland) got an unusual opportunity for a state lawmaker this week: a speaking gig at the Democratic National Convention in Philadelphia. Here’s her July 25 speech, and what it meant. BEN STONE.

Good evening! I’m Tina Kotek, vice chair of the Democratic Legislative Campaign Committee [1] and speaker of the House from the great state of Oregon. As the first lesbian speaker of any state House in our nation [2], I have personally witnessed the tremendous progress toward equality and justice for the LGBTQ community [3]. We have come so far, and we cannot go back. I’m known for being someone who tells it like it is. And, the fact is, I’m with Hillary—because she is with me [4]. Hillary Clinton understands that the work to improve the lives of everyday Americans doesn’t just need to happen in Washington, D.C. It needs to happen in state capitols all across the country. Just like Hillary, Oregon Democrats—and Democratic state legislators across the country—are proud to stand up for the hard-working people we represent. We’ve been leading the country by advancing progressive policies that level the playing field [5] and create an economy that works for all Americans. From raising the minimum wage [6] to requiring earned sick leave [7] to taking on racial profiling [8], Democratic leaders in the states are getting it done! And now we need to elect Hillary Clinton to ensure the progress we are making isn’t compromised by risky, reckless leadership in the Oval Office [9]. From the statehouse to the White House, we need leaders like Hillary Clinton who will stand up to the bullies who threaten fairness and equality, offer real solutions that put working families first, and build an economy that gives everyone a fair shot at success [10]. Hillary Clinton is our answer to intolerance and fear. And I have her back—because I know she stands with all of us.

1. This is the national fundraising committee for state-level Democratic legislative candidates. Kotek’s top role on this committee put her in a good position when the Democratic National Committee looked for three lawmakers to talk about liberal policies on a state level.

DNC Tweet Deck

Don’t trust the media? Get the social scoop from Oregon delegates on the Democratic National Convention floor. JOHANNA BERNHARD.

Leigha LaFleur

TEXT FOR BERNIE VOLUNTEER @Leigha2020

Jeff Merkley

3. Same-sex couples in Oregon won the right to marry in May 2014—not through a political campaign, but via a U.S. district judge’s ruling.

U.S. SENATOR

@SenJeffMerkley

Earl Blumenauer

U.S. REPRESENTATIVE 6. In March, Gov. Kate Brown signed into law what was, for a month, the highest statewide minimum wage in the U.S.: $14.75 in the Portland area and $12.50 to $13.50 in the rest of Oregon, by 2022.

8. In July 2015, Brown signed a law restricting employers from inquiring about an applicant’s criminal background during the early stages of a job application. That “ban the box” legislation, like paid sick leave and a higher minimum wage, is now a part of Clinton’s platform.

@repblumenauer

Lupita Maurer

DEMOCRATIC PARTY OF OREGON @lupitam

Shemia Fagan

STATE REPRESENTATIVE @RepShemiaFagan

Corinne Ellis

CO-DIRECTOR OF UNIVERSITY OF OREGON FOR BERNIE SANDERS @CorinneMEllis

Gregory McKelvey

9. Donald Trump.

ACTIVIST FOR RACIAL JUSTICE @GregoryMcKelvey

FOUR QUESTIONS Norm Frink, former Multnomah County chief deputy district attorney, is a Republican— staunch enough to be a party delegate. But he loathes GOP presidential nominee Donald Trump. How much? He wore a T-shirt reading “Never Trump” for all four days on the convention floor last week in Cleveland. (Check out Frink’s convention diary at wweek.com.) JOHANNA BERNHARD.

WW: Did you wear that shirt all week? Norm Frink: Well, I had more than one. What was the response? The majority of Trump people, there was no response. I had a lot of people, who weren’t Trump people, who would give me a thumbs-up or say, “That’s great,” but I’d notice they weren’t wearing anything

that was associated with #NeverTrump. What did you make of Trump’s speech? Some of its criticisms of Clinton had some justification, but it took problems, some of which are real, and exaggerated them. For example, in my little area of criminal justice: This picture that was painted that the system is completely broken,

compared to the way the criminal justice system was 20 years ago, was just not accurate. Like a lot of Trump’s stuff, it plays on notions that have a kernel of truth in them, but goes way beyond reality. So you’re not going to vote for Trump? Oh, absolutely not. Probably I would vote for the Libertarian ticket. I will vote.

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

C EL

EBR

G OR N I T A

EG O N’S B O

UN T

FOR THE

People CELEBRATING OREGON’S BOUNTY

AUGUST 12-14

PORTLAND’S WATERFRONT PARK

ACF Pro Chefs Oregon • Daiya Foods • Pacific Seafood • PGE Renewable • Sears Home Improvement • Ticketfly • Vacation Internationale

advance tickets at: biteoforegon.com 8

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

christine dong

NEWS

“You agree that anY dispute or claim relating in anY waY to Your use of the services will be resolved bY binding arbitration, rather than in court.” about the first one. And, consistent with best practices, we provide an opportunity for any members who prefer not to arbitrate to opt out.” There is a way out of BikeTown’s arbitration clause: Email legal@motivateco.com with the subject line, “ARBITRATION AND CLASS ACTION WAIVER OPT-OUT” within 30 days. But Goldsmith says few people will bother. “It’s a fig leaf,” Goldsmith tells WW. “Some PHOTO: Caption tktktk number in the high 90 percent of people never read it.” Mandatory arbitration clauses are common in private companies’ contracts, appearing in user agreements for companies from Microsoft to American Express and apps such as Pokémon Go. But they’ve received increased scrutiny and backlash since a 2015 New York Times investigation. This spring, the Consumer Federal Protection Bureau proposed new rules to ban financial companies from putexperts, as well as numerous city officials, interviewed by ting the clauses in contracts with customers. New rules proposed last month by the Department of Education would WW could think of no other local examples. ban the clauses in the contracts of any educational instituThose legal observers were troubled. “The city spent time developing this, using employees’ tion that receives federal funding. Chicago’s city council is time, using money from the citizens of Portland,” says currently considering a proposal to ban any company that Lake Perriguey, a leading Portland civil rights lawyer. “To uses the clauses from doing business with the city. When city officials launched BikeTown last week, they access government services, generally you don’t have to praised it as an ideal public-private partnership. waive your constitutional rights.” Officials lauded the fact that the program will not Portlanders can sue their water and sewer providers. They can sue other transportation services: TriMet, the operators require taxpayer money for its day-to-day operation, of the SmartPark garages, and even the aerial tram. They can instead relying on a five-year, $10 million sponsorship deal with Nike. The project began in 2011 with $2 million sue rec centers and public pools. WW could find just one contractor receiving city money in federal grant money, allocated by Metro. The placement that has an arbitration clause similar to BikeTown’s: Active of its racks, bicycles and terminals was organized by the Network, which provides services for Portland Parks & Portland Bureau of Transportation, and the state contribRecreation’s website. (A trash-pickup company contract- uted $42,000 for a BikeTown rack at Union Station. Yet city transportation officials say they did not know ing with regional government Metro has a similar clause, that Motivate was placing an arbitration clause in the but with an exception for injuries or property damage.) Private arbitration clauses in contracts are used to BikeTown contract. “Throughout the process of launching BikeTown, we shield corporations from consumer lawsuits, says Phil have been careful not to discuss the ins and outs of the conGoldsmith, a Portland lawyer and mediator. In the 1990s, “businesses started doing arbitration as a tract negotiations,” says PBOT spokesman Dylan Rivera. way to gain advantages over their nonunion employees,” “We feel this is important in order to preserve the integrity says Goldsmith. “The stronger party writes the terms, the of both past and future negotiations. We do encourage all people who use BikeTown to read the user agreement.” weaker party gets to say yes or no.” City Commissioner Steve Novick, who oversees the Legal experts say arbitration stacks the deck against bureau, now says keeping a distance from contract details consumers. “Arbitrations are typically run by these private arbi- was a mistake. “When the city attorney and PBOT negotiated with tration companies,” says Mark Ginsberg, the Portland personal injury lawyer who spotted the BikeTown clause. Motivate, I now wish the city had considered asking for “They are very pro-corporation-biased. They are not fair, stronger language concerning legal remedies,” Novick says. “We should keep this in mind with all city contracts. they are not a level playing field. They are not even close.” In a statement, a Motivate spokeswoman defended the These mandatory arbitration clauses are now rampant, and that is disturbing.” company’s practices. Ginsberg says he was disappointed to discover the “We believe arbitration is the most efficient and expedient process for resolving disputes,” Motivate tells WW clause in a city program he otherwise supports. “I really do want BikeTown to succeed,” Ginsberg says. in a company statement. “The process assigns a neutral arbitrator to each case and provides an option for either “[But] that type of agreement is not needed to run a bikepart to have a new arbitrator assigned if there is any doubt share program.”

Shared Risk BIKETOWN IS A RARITY: A PORTLAND CITY SERVICE THAT BARS USERS FROM SUING. By pe t e r d ’aur i a

pdauria @wweek.com

Evan Hanczor was eager to explore Portland on a BikeTown ride. The Brooklyn, N.Y., resident rented two bicycles last weekend from Portland’s brand-new, bright orange bikeshare system. But he had no idea that by clicking “yes” on the contract in the BikeTown phone app, he was waiving his right to sue the bike share. “That’s troubling,” Hanczor said July 22. “When you’re hopping on a bike, you’re agreeing to some risk. But if it was a clear malfunction of the equipment, whoever runs this should have some sort of exposure.” Last week’s launch of a long-awaited Portland bike-share system was by many measures a success. In its first six days, 5,500 people made 13,023 trips on the rental bikes. But within 48 hours of the BikeTown debut, a Portland personal injury lawyer made an alarming discovery: an obscure clause in the contract, barring riders from suing BikeTown in court. Buried about three-quarters of the way through the bike share’s user agreement, a clause stipulates that users must waive their right to a civil jury trial if something goes wrong on a ride. Instead, the contract forces them into private arbitration with the bike share’s operator, New York-based company Motivate. “You agree that any dispute or claim relating in any way to your use of the services will be resolved by binding arbitration, rather than in court,” the agreement reads. It also bars customers from joining a class action lawsuit. The clause, first reported July 20 by the website BikePortland, is a rare instance—possibly the only one—where a contractor providing publicly funded Portland city services has locked out its customers from suing, even if they get hurt or have their property damaged. Five arbitration

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

W W S TA F F

NEWS

Street Justice

ARMY STRONG: Eric Zimmerman says he acted in defense of his then-partner in 2011 when he punched a man who had ﬁrst struck his boyfriend. “Anyone would want to protect their loved ones,” he says. “It was a threat, and I got rid of the threat.”

CANDIDATE ERIC ZIMMERMAN PUNCHED A MAN IN THE FACE. HE SAYS IT WAS THE RIGHT CALL. BY B ETH SLOVIC

bslovic@wweek.com

When Ryan Thompson, 34, opened his Voters’ Pamphlet this spring at his home in Goose Hollow, the Portland jeweler shuddered. Staring up at him was a picture of Eric Zimmerman, a candidate for Multnomah County commissioner. “That’s the guy who punched me,” he recalls thinking. Zimmerman does not deny striking Thompson in the face five years ago in a downtown fracas. But Thompson and Zimmerman disagree about almost everything else, including who shoulders the blame for the November 2011 punch. Zimmerman says his actions ended a fight, and that he reacted to protect his then-partner. The Multnomah County District Attorney’s Office never brought charges against Zimmerman, who faces Sharon Meieran in a November runoff to replace Position 1 Commissioner Jules Bailey. The incident is little more than a bizarre footnote in the race, but it may raise voter questions about the judgment of Zimmerman, who currently serves as chief of staff to County Commissioner Diane McKeel. A 2011 police report lays out the basic facts. On Nov. 20, 2011, Thompson was at Silverado, a gay bar at Southwest 3rd Avenue and Stark Street, when he ran into an old acquaintance from Corvallis, Adan Salinas, Zimmerman’s partner at the time. Thompson and Salinas argued. What they fought about is not entirely clear; Salinas did not respond to a request for comment. “I ended up just socking him,” Thompson says, “which is wrong, I admit.” Thompson has a history of trouble with the law, before and after that night, including charges of driving under the influence in 2004 and 2010. Disorderly conduct and harassment charges against him were dismissed in 2012, and he pleaded guilty to felony assault in November 2014. 10

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

But it was Thompson who filed a complaint with police. Thompson says he was blocks from Silverado walking home when Salinas and his partner— whom police later identified as Zimmerman— pulled up in a Volkswagen and approached Thompson. “It was pretty obvious what they wanted to do,” says Thompson. “They were after me to try to get even with me.” Thompson felt threatened when Salinas and Zimmerman approached him, so he punched Salinas again. He says he was knocked to the ground, kicked and punched, but he wasn’t sure by whom. Thompson called police that night, but officers declined to write a report. Six days later, he contacted police again, insisting on pressing charges. Portland Officer Timothy Hoerauf then interviewed Salinas, who said he had stopped his car not to stalk Thompson but because he wanted to get Thompson’s full name to file his own police report. (He never did.) Salinas said “he and his partner knocked Thompson to the ground,” but he declined to give the officer Zimmerman’s name. Without that information, the DA’s office would not consider prosecuting, according to notes from that time. “We have competing versions of events from the two parties directly involved in the incident,” wrote Deputy District Attorney Tom Mott. “Who was Mr. Salinas’ partner?” Seven months later, in June 2012, Zimmerman came forward, telling Hoerauf he wasn’t aware police had been looking for him. Zimmerman says he wasn’t drinking. He told Hoerauf that Thompson had “gone too far” when he punched his then-partner a second time, so he used his military training to subdue Thompson. Zimmerman, who worked for the Multnomah County assessor at the time, is an Iraq War veteran and Oregon Army National Guard captain. “By putting an arm around Thompson’s head, Zimmerman took him to the ground,” Hoerauf reported. “Zimmerman said he got into a ‘front mount’ position on Thompson and punched him in the face near his eye. Zimmerman said when he realized Thompson was no longer a threat, he stood up and left with Salines [sic] in his car.” After documenting Zimmerman’s account, Hoerauf’s police report fell into a black hole. It was never re-referred to the district attorney’s office, records show, and a spokesman for the office wouldn’t say how it would have responded. Today, Zimmerman defends his actions. “I ended the fight,” he says, “and I ended the fight the best way I knew how, with my military training.”

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

COURTESY OF KGW

Devontre Thomas could face a year in prisonâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;for a gram of marijuana. 12

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

BY LEAH S OTTI LE

@Leah_Sottile

Devontre Thomas is 19 years old. In a few weeks, he goes on trial in federal court in Portland. If he loses, he could go to prison for a year. For possessing an amount of cannabis that would fill one joint. How could this happen in Oregon? On April 7, 2016, the U.S. attorney for Oregon filed a one-count federal misdemeanor charge against Thomas for possessing “about a gram” of marijuana, according to his public defender, Ruben Iniguez. That’s barely enough cannabis to dust the bottom of a Ziploc. “I’ve never seen a case like this in my entire time practicing in federal court,” says Bear Wilner-Nugent, a Portland criminal defense lawyer for 12 years. “It’s outlandish.” It’s the first time in at least three years that the feds are prosecuting a weed crime in Oregon. Since then, Oregon voters legalized recreational marijuana. Anyone over 21 can walk into a store and buy up to a quarter ounce—7 grams—of cannabis. In the first five months of recreational sales, the state collected $14.9 million in marijuana sales taxes. But weed isn’t equally legal everywhere in Oregon. Thomas is accused of screwing up like any other teenager. But his alleged mistake occurred at Chemawa Indian School, a boarding school in the state capital, Salem, operated by the Bureau of Indian Education, an arm of the federal government.

Observers say Thomas’ prosecution, first reported by KGW-TV, is a poster case for how the nation’s drug laws are still stacked against minorities—especially Native Americans. “There’s absolutely racial disparity in how these cases are charged,” says Amy Margolis, a lawyer at Emerge Law Group, a Portland firm that specializes in cannabis cases. “[Thomas] had the bad luck of being where and who he was.” Through his attorney, Thomas declined to comment for this story, saying he doesn’t want to jeopardize his case. A conviction could mean a year in prison and a $1,000 fine. Federal charges can’t be vacated, so Thomas could be denied federal student loans, public housing and government aid for the rest of his life. The prosecution of Thomas raises questions about the priorities of U.S. Attorney for Oregon Billy Williams, the state’s chief federal prosecutor. Among them: Why are federal prosecutors, who claim that Oregon is a den of heroin, meth and opioid trafficking, spending time and resources to go after a teenager for such a small amount of pot? After two weeks of declining requests for comment, Williams finally issued this statement to WW: “We look forward to addressing the facts of the case in an appropriate manner and, most importantly, within the judicial process.” But members of Oregon’s congressional delegation say it’s alarming that Williams would prosecute the case at all.

U.S. Attorney for Oregon Billy Williams

SHAKE DOWN CONT. on page 14

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

COURTESY OF KGW

LUIS BAEZ

SHAKEDOWN “I think it’s deplorable,” says U.S. Rep. Earl Blumenauer (D-Ore.). “What are we doing? Where are our priorities? A kid? Turning his life upside down? They don’t have anything better to do to protect young people or Oregonians? It’s incomprehensible to me.”

Devontre Thomas talked to KGW in May about his fear of looming federal charges.

As bizarre as Thomas’ pot case is in weed-happy Oregon, the place where his alleged offense occurred is just as much of an anachronism. Chemawa, a Native American boarding school, was founded in 1880 and is the longest continually operating boarding school for Native American youth. (Chemawa administrators declined multiple requests to comment for this story.) Today, Chemawa and the three other off-reservation, Bureau of Indian Education-run boarding schools left in the nation are seen as places of opportunity for native youth—even if some of the schools are marred by histories of assimilation and abuse. Thomas arrived at Chemawa from Madras High School, where he spent his first two years before transferring. He is a member of the Warm Springs tribe, and grew up with his parents and grandparents on the tribe’s reservation 105 miles southeast of Portland. WW contacted several of Thomas’ family members, all of whom declined to comment for this story. A parent of a fellow Chemawa student described the Thomases as “a good family.” His friends say his childhood was that of a normal, loved boy: spending the night at friends’ houses, playing basketball on the Madras High junior varsity team. Mitchell Lira grew up with Thomas on the Warm Springs reservation, attending school together from preschool to high school. When Lira left Madras High School—some 25 miles from their home on the reservation—to attend Chemawa, he pleaded with his friend to come along. “I knew I had to make a change if I wanted something better,” Lira says. “I wanted to go somewhere where I was supported and believed in. I think [Thomas] realized he had to make a change just like I did.” Thomas and Lira were drawn to Chemawa by family ties: Lira says his great-grandfather attended the boarding school back when new students had their hair cut off upon admission and were punished for speaking their native language. But Lira says Chemawa provides opportunities they couldn’t get back home. According to the school’s website, Chemawa had just under 450 students during the 2014-2015 school year, with 18 coming from the Warm Springs reservation, just across the Cascades. The 1,019-square-mile reservation, situated among the brown high-desert cliffs and towering ponderosa pine forests of Central Oregon, often makes the news when things go wrong. This year, a lumber mill that offered some of the area’s best jobs closed. A woman was found violently murdered in her home in May; her husband was found dead in a car crash two days later. People are isolated in Warm Springs, far from jobs, schools and opportunities for change. It is a place where some 60 percent of the population can’t secure stable employment. Lira, who now attends the University of Oregon, says he’ll always think of the reservation

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

as his home. But “there’s not a lot to go home to. There’s family. But the reservation—it doesn’t change,” he says. “It’s not an easy place to grow up, but it’s home for me.” Lira describes Thomas as someone who is like a brother to him, who’d shoot hoops with him, who’d playfully tease him. “I’m a big LeBron James guy,” he laughs. “So he’s always liked Kobe.” Thomas was his friend who was always into something new: new bands, new books. He went running many mornings and could often be found watering plants in the school greenhouse. Lira says Thomas is happier outside than cooped up indoors. And he isn’t someone who worried about the future. “He just wants to capture the moment and not think about tomorrow’s worries,” Lira says. “Just relax and live in the moment. Just take it with a grain of salt and take it as they come.” Rayvaughn Skidmore, 20, also attended Chemawa with Thomas and Lira. Skidmore says Thomas “would always help out his peers and be a leader— showing them what’s the right things to do.” Skidmore says Chemawa staff members would sometimes drive kids into town to go shopping at Keizer Station Shopping Center or Lancaster Mall in Salem, and he thinks that’s when some students would meet up with marijuana connections and bring the substance back to campus. But when kids on campus were caught with marijuana in their possession, “they’d get sent home.” Skidmore says those infractions never resulted in legal charges, even though he knew plenty of classmates who regularly smoked weed. “These other students who are highly abusing any type of marijuana—I don’t see why those guys get sent home when they should be prosecuted,” he says. Skidmore says it wasn’t hard to tell the good kids from the troublemakers at Chemawa. “Devontre—he was really good,” he says. Thomas was never technically arrested for marijuana possession. On March 25, 2015, Iniguez says, a staff member at Chemawa found roughly a gram of marijuana in a student’s backpack. That kid said Thomas had sold him the weed. The Marion County Sheriff’s Office confirmed that it responded to a call on that date involving Thomas and a juvenile classmate for “delivery” of marijuana. Nearly a year after a classmate ratted out Thomas, a Chemawa staff member and a police officer drove him to the federal courthouse in Portland to appear before a judge. Lawyers interviewed for this story say it’s likely that Thomas is feeling outsized consequences because Chemawa Indian School is under federal jurisdiction. In the wake of pot legalization in Washington and Colorado, U.S. Attorney General James Cole issued a memorandum to prosecutors on priorities for enforcement. Among them: keeping it off federal property and out of the hands of minors. Retired federal drug prosecutor John Deits says Thomas’ case is probably being handled as a federal case because “it’s the only jurisdiction that can respond to the charge.” “Nobody else has authority,” Deits says. “Marion County doesn’t have authority because it’s exclusive federal authority. And Indian tribes CONT. on page 16

Warm Springs Indian Reservation.

WARM SPRINGS WEED CO. Devontre Thomas’ marijuanapossession case includes a twist: The very tribe he is a member of is poised to become one of the first in the nation to successfully dive into the legal cannabis business. The Warm Springs tribe hopes to open a 36,000-squarefoot cannabis cultivation, extraction and wholesaling facility on reservation land in the next year—a project approved by a majority vote of tribal members and coordinated with Gov. Kate Brown’s office. The Warm Springs tribe believes getting into the pot business will bring jobs to an area that badly needs them. “When’s the last time you’ve even seen an emerging market? Shellfish? Timber?” asks Pi-Ta Pitt, cannabis project coordinator for Warm Springs. “We’ve never really seen something come out of the dark like this. We have the opportunity to create sustainable jobs without a lot of environmental impact. “When you’re looking at the poverty levels and unemployment levels that we have? Heck, yeah.” Don Sampson, CEO of Warm Springs Ventures, says in addition to jobs in cultivation on the reservation, the tribe plans to open three dispensaries—in Portland, Eugene and Salem—to sell the product. Pot possession is illegal on federal property, and it’s also illegal for Warm Springs tribal members of any age to have weed on the reservation. On this point, representatives of Warm Springs Ventures—the tribe’s economic development corporation—are clear: When tribal members voted last December to approve growing and processing marijuana on the reservation, they did not vote to legalize personal possession. “We could if we chose—we chose not to,” Sampson says. “That was a decision by the tribal membership. We had a referendum, and the tribal members voted for cultivation, extraction, wholesale, retail.” In 2014, the Department of Justice issued the “Wilkinson

Memo,” which explained how sovereign Indian nations would be treated the same as states if they chose to legalize marijuana. Since then, several tribes nationwide have attempted to get into the cannabis business, only to have their efforts unraveled by the feds. In July 2015, marijuanacultivation facilities were raided on Pit River tribal land at Alturas Indian Rancheria and XL Ranch in Northern California. In October, federal agents raided an industrial hemp production plant on the Menominee Indian Reservation in Wisconsin, which had thought it was allowed to grow the plant under the 2014 U.S. Farm Bill, only to discover that tribal nations weren’t included in that bill. And in November, the Flandreau Santee Sioux Tribe of South Dakota announced plans to use its sovereignty to open a marijuana resort—only to torch its entire crop when it received scrutiny from lawmakers and word of a potential raid. So what makes Warm Springs tribal members confident it won’t happen to them? Pitt says that being in a state where recreational marijuana is legal makes it difficult to compare the Warm Springs project to others. “In both [Pit River and Menominee], you have a tribe that had some sort of level of county and/or state jurisdiction over them—Warm Springs doesn’t have either,” he says. “Warm Springs tribal members are the only people who have voted on cannabis twice.” Neither Pitt, Sampson nor any of the half-dozen tribal leaders contacted by WW would comment on the prosecution of Devontre Thomas. Portland lawyer Bear WilnerNugent thinks the prosecution of a teenage Warm Springs tribal member won’t derail the tribe’s plans to get into the cannabis business. “This prosecution will be remembered, if at all,” he says, “as not only a mistake but an aberration that does not set the pattern for anything else.” LEAH SOTTILE.

“THEy DON’T HAVE ANyTHING BETTER TO DO TO PROTECT yOUNG PEOPLE OR OREGONIANS? IT’S INCOMPREHENSIBLE TO ME.”—U.S. Rep. Earl Blumenauer (D-Ore.) Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

SHAKEDOWN

COURTESY OF MITCHELL LIRA

don’t have jurisdiction because it didn’t happen on their land.” Experts in federal policy for Native Americans say tribe members can face triple jeopardy in court. “The tribe can go after them for something,” says Addie Rolnick, a law professor who specializes in Indian law at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas. “And then either the federal government or the state government will be able to go after them as well. And in some places, both of them can.” The resulting prosecution of Thomas shocks national observers. “He’s 19. This is going to potentially haunt him the rest of his life,” says Alison Holcomb, director of the American Civil Liberties Union’s national Campaign for Smart Justice in Seattle. It’s also a stark reminder that the War on Drugs isn’t over—even in Oregon. According to an October 2015 report released by the U.S. Department of Justice, 11,533 people nationwide remained in federal prison for marijuana charges— compared to 5,800 for heroin and 3,247 for OxyContin and Ecstasy—at the end of the 2012 fiscal year. Just 19 people are doing time in Oregon for crimes involving marijuana alone, though that number spikes to 157 for those serving sentences for marijuana and an additional offense. Observers find it bizarre that the feds have continued to pursue Thomas’ case. But U.S. Attorney General Loretta Lynch has been vocal about her desire to keep pot illegal. Local responsibility for prosecuting Thomas falls to Williams, the U.S. attorney for Oregon. In his statement to WW, Williams says he can’t comment on the details of the case. “We are committed to just outcomes in every case,” he says. “We look forward to exploring whatever the defense ask that we consider before determining what we believe is an appropriate outcome.” Other federal officials are critical of the prosecution. “The federal government hasn’t prosecuted a marijuana-possession case in Oregon in five years,” says U.S. Sen. Jeff Merkley (D-Ore.). “Situations like this are best left to be handled by the state.” Blumenauer, who as an Oregon congressman has become one of the nation’s loudest voices for marijuana legalization, is enraged. “It is such a powerful symbol of a waste of

Devontre Thomas (front row, second from left) and friend Mitchell Lira (third from left) grew up playing basketball together on the Warm Springs reservation.

“HE’S 19. THIS IS GOING TO POTENTIALLY HAUNT HIM THE REST OF HIS LIFE.”

—Alison Holcomb, ACLU

resources and the inequity of the system,” says Blumenauer, “because you and I can walk around in Portland, or in states where it is illegal, and find people using it. To single him out, to proceed with this, to ignore real problems that are killing people…” He pauses. “I’m sorry,” he finally says. “I’m getting carried away. It’s incomprehensible to me. I’m just sorry that Mr. Thomas is caught up in it.” The people surrounding Thomas in the federal courthouse in Portland on July 8—Assistant U.S. Attorney Jennifer Martin, U.S. District Chief Justice Michael

ROCKY LEGAL HIGH Cannabis prohibition is supposed to be over in Oregon. But data from other states suggests the color of your skin changes the legality of marijuana. Studies in Washington and Colorado, which both legalized recreational marijuana in 2012, still show wide disparities in pot arrests of juveniles in those states. For example, this 2016 report issued by the Colorado Department of Public Safety shows wide disparities in rates that juveniles of diﬀerent races were arrested for pot possession after the state legalized cannabis. (It’s even worse than these numbers suggest, since minorities make up a very small percentage of Colorado’s population.) White, Asian and Native American kids were arrested less frequently. But black and Latino kids were arrested increasingly often. LEAH SOTTILE. S O U R C E : C O LO R A D O D E PA R T M E N T O F P U B L I C S A F E T Y, DIVISION OF CRIMINAL JUSTICE.

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

Colorado juvenile cannabis arrest rate per 100,000 people

BLACK 1200 1000 800

WHITE LATINO

600 400

NATIVE AMER. ASIAN

200 0

2012

2013

2014

Mosman, three functionaries and a probation officer— expected Thomas to plead guilty to drug possession and enter a six-month diversion program. But a few moments earlier, Thomas’ public defender, Iniguez, hustled into the courtroom with Thomas to announce a change of plans. “He’s not going to be pleading guilty today,” Iniguez said. Martin, the prosecutor, looked shocked. “We want to go to trial?” she asked, flummoxed. “If we’re making a federal case out of it,” said Iniguez, sneaking in a smile, “we’ll make a federal case out of it.” Holcomb, of the national ACLU, speculates that Thomas’ last-minute decision not to plead guilty may show a steadfastness on his part to prove that he’s no different from any other Oregon teenager who messed around with pot. “Devontre’s response, to me, indicates a genuinely felt sense of unfairness,” Holcomb says. “That it is unfair that he’s being charged in federal court for this. It’s the latest in a string of dramatic examples of how deeply people are feeling about unfairness and inequality…it sounds like that bubbled up for Devontre.” For now, Thomas is working on a nonprofit farm in Sandy that provides job training for youth and sells produce at farmers markets. Mitchell Lira says when he spoke to Thomas last week, he couldn’t help but notice that his friend— someone whom he had always known not to worry, to live in the moment and be happy—sounded scared. “It sounded like he was breaking down on the phone,” Lira says. “He was just telling me, ‘Keep doing what you’re doing.’ There was definitely something wrong. You could tell. I think it was getting to him. I could hear it in his voice.” Thomas is scheduled for trial Sept.13.

EST

1994

EVER AFTER

503-226-0629 â&#x20AC;¢ gemsetlove.com

720 NW 23 RD AVENUE PORTLAND, OREGON 97210 Formerly known as GILT Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

BIKES

8 7

DrinkyTown

I L L U S T R AT I O N S B Y K A R A L I E J U R A S K A

WE TESTED PORTLAND’S NEW NIKE-THEMED BIKE SHARE WITH A 12-BAR CRAWL. BY WW STA F F

Portland’s new BikeTown share system (pronounced BYkee-town) officially launched July 20. And while we’re certain that a number of Portlanders plan to pay $12 a month plus miles to use it for their daily commute, most users will be tourists or locals who’d rather pick up a random bike immediately than wait for a cab. Which is to say, impatient drunks who are not too drunk. And so we decided to test BikeTown—with all its many flaws and virtues—with a bar crawl. We got $12 day passes and took BikeTown bikes on an eight-hour tour plotted to get us to the vastest possible array of bars located within one block of a BikeTown station, from the low-down diviest dive in Portland (the graffiti by the pinball machine reads “Never challenge a lesbian at finger games!”) to its bougiest basement cocktail bar (amaretto sour, $14). If you have guests visiting Portland and want to experience everything this city’s bar scene has to offer, saddle up and ride this 8.3-mile route. Because what’s a bar crawl without at least one McMenamins…

23rd Avenue Bottle Shop 2290 NW Thurman St., 971-202-7256, mcmenamins.com/bottleshop.

W W S TA F F

BikeTown does not reward careful planning. I bought my day pass July 19, before the program officially launched, excited to use it on July 21. Well, after a $2.50 Stiegl radler at this McMenamins bottle shop that sits in a renovated and opulently decorated bodega by our office, I grabbed a bike only to discover that my membership had expired

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

without me touching a bike—and that I’d have to buy a new one using the not fully mobile-optimized site. It would not be the last time we felt a little ripped off by the terms of use. MARTIN CIZMAR. Get some cheap happy-hour bourbon cocktails…

Pope House Bourbon Lounge 2075 NW Glisan St., 503-222-1056, popehouselounge.com.

On the way to Portland’s sunniest happy-hour whiskey porch—home to $5 cocktails in the afternoon— one of our riders was asked by a guy on the street whether she worked for BikeTown. Apparently, he wasn’t willing to believe we’d ride one without being paid to do so. Meanwhile, a car on Northrup angrily lurched past a stop sign at us, repeatedly, in an apparent passive-aggressive antibike-share protest. We dinged our bells all the way up the street, located way too conveniently on the left handlebar. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Or, perhaps, the city’s most refined cocktails…

Teardrop Lounge

1015 NW Everett St., 503-445-8109, teardroplounge.com.

We discovered our first BikeTown compatriot. The etiquette appears to be to raise your fist at the other orange biker and yell, “BIKEYTOWN!” Anyway, that’s what we did while coasting down broad, bike-laned Everett Street en route to the teardrop-shaped bar where some of the city’s finest mixologists serve alcoholic egg whites to makers of phone apps. The brand-new bikes ride smooth, and the seats are so sit-up they feel like Cruisers despite being funny 8-speeds. MK.

Or its most refined Long Island Iced Tea…

Pepe Le Moko

407 SW 10th Ave., 503-546-8537, pepelemokopdx.com.

Somehow, a celebrity gawking feels better when you’re on one of six bright orange touristy bikes with embarrassing swooshes on them. Sam “Lebowski Cowboy” Elliott and I exchanged waves on 11th Avenue, just north of Burnside. I was on a dorky orange bike with a huge molded metal orange basket. Would we look more or less cool with a striped paper straw, in a chi-chi basement bar serving oysters and $14 grasshoppers to Japanese tourists? MK. Drink Pabst at the Pabstiest bar in Oregon…

Yamhill Pub

223 SW Yamhill St., 503-295-6613.

Despite its grizzled facade, the Yamhill Pub is a very friendly working-class bar with every wall covered with an amount of graffiti straight out of a 1970s NYC subway car, the bar filled with middle-aged men enjoying pitchers of PBR while old kung fu movies play silently on the television. The Yamhill is the state’s leader in PBR sales, with a gentleman at the bar informing us the pub blows through 18 kegs a week, down from a peak of 26. After a round of pints and two $1 bags of microwave popcorn—an extravagant expenditure that earned a shout of “High rollers!!!” from the bartender—we were on our way to the waterfront for our next stop. WALKER MACMURDO. Total bike ride time from McMenamins Tavern and Pool: 33 minutes. Estimated calories burned: 103.

Bask on the city’s most famous beer patio…

Apex

1216 SE Divison St., 503-273-9227, apexbar.com.

Get local with 99 Oregon beer taps…

Loyal Legion

710 SE 6th Ave., 503-235-8272, loyallegionpdx.com.

Biking Waterfront Park en route to the bridge crossing was the most touristy we felt on the neon Swooshmachines. One person yelled, “We don’t use turn signals here!” for some reason, and three groups of people took photos of us. A wrong turn also left us carrying the heavy bikes up a bark-chip path; BikeTown bikes are not great for off-roading, it turns out, though their large wheels tackle MAX tracks better than most. When we got to the Tilikum, we had our second celebrity sighting of the day—the large-testicled horses of Cavalia—plus, the most open-road, clear-skied experience of the day. When I finally got to Apex, I locked my bike directly in front, not realizing that each time you lock a bike to a nonBikeTown rack, it charges you $2—there was a rack just a block away. We’d done the same at the Yamhill Pub, where there were absolutely no empty racks to lock to. Also, a left brake lever failed. Anyway, on Apex’s sweltering patio, some in our group traded tastes of obscure rose-hipped Mikkeller and imported Ayinger—and for some reason two writers started a list of “what’s cool right now” that included ketamine, the obese cat licking its belly on the patio, and the internet of late 2014. I liked my Pallet Jack. SOPHIA JUNE. Ride time from Yamhill Pub: 45 minutes. Estimated calories burned: 168.

It seems the later in the day we got, the more bikes in each rack had little messages that read, “Bike in Repair.” Unable to get the full number we needed, we ended up walking the few blocks to Loyal Legion, home to the longest Oregon beer menu in all Portland, plus sausages and air conditioning. Nearby, I picked up some cowboy boots on the sidewalk—perfectly wearable and somehow utterly abandoned. Perhaps they once belonged to Sam Elliott? MK.

Get basic at the High Dive…

Tipple a tiki drink at a refurbished dive…

The High Dive

1406 SE 12th Ave, 503-384-2285.

The marathon ride to Apex left me sweating through my jeans, so when it came time to embark once more, I and two others succumbed to the heat and cheated by riding 0.6 miles in a car to the blissfully cool, dimly lit High Dive. The unfussy midrange hangout’s corrugated metal façade gives the exterior a kind of “Etsy pool shack” vibe that isn’t entirely compatible with the pseudo-Twin Peaks interior, but the quiet and the cool made it an ideal location to explore such pressing questions as which member of the company was more of a Carrie Bradshaw versus which was Marnie Michaels. Generations clashed until the Jell-O shots. GRACE CULHANE. Ride time from Apex: 3 minutes. Estimated calories burned: For me? Zero. Worship at the House of sours…

Cascade Barrel House

939 SE Belmont St., 503-265-8603, cascadebrewing.com.

Out in front of the barrel house, a woman was measuring the BikeTown bike racks with a tape measure—frustratedly losing her place as the tape scraped along the street. And maybe it was all the sour beers or the salty pickles, but the conversation turned acerbic at Cascade Barrel House. Should I have told my boss the political candidate he supports is a warmonger? Perhaps not. I swigged the Bing blanc, which tasted like cherry pie, and high-fived the Berkeley-grad intern who was the only person at the table sufficiently concerned about the impending Mad Max hellscape arriving at the hands of the capitalists. ZACH MIDDLETON. Ride time from the High Dive: 3 minutes. Estimated calories burned: 16.8.

Eat jackfruit tacos at the city’s ultimate hipster patio…

Headout P.23

Rontoms

600 E Burnside St., 503-236-4536, rontoms.net.

It’s less than half a mile uphill from Loyal Legion’s halls to Rontoms, but at this point it was too much effort. BikeTown’s caloric tracker says this ride burned 15 calories, the equivalent of 1.5 almonds or 2.5 jelly beans. Instead, we opted for jackfruit tacos and vodka sodas. The bamboo-lined patio is perpetually filled with Zooey Deschanel look-alikes and tattooed brand ambassadors. It’s not a place you want to be seen sore and sweaty, but any self-consciousness was easily fixed with gin. ENID SPITZ. Ride time from Loyal Legion: 5 minutes. Estimated calories burned: 15.

Sandy Hut

1430 NE Sandy Blvd., 503-235-7972.

By 6:30 pm, a blanket of clouds was forcing hot, wet air down on our remaining posse as we pedaled up Sandy. I realized—swearing, aggrieved—that I’d found my third consecutive bike unequipped with a functioning fifth gear. Sandy Hut is a dank, denlike dive that serves tiki drinks and barrels of rum. I ordered the Sandy Sling, a towering glass of fruit and booze based on the Hunter S. Thompson standby. My companion was mystified that I’d managed to find an $8 cocktail during happy hour, then noted that the man playing pool behind me looked precisely like every divorced deadbeat dad from ’90s movies. ZM. Ride time from Rontoms: 5 minutes. Estimated calories burned: 22.

Drink wildly alcoholic patio slushies at the ultimate Portland neighborhood bar….

The Standard

14 NE 22nd Ave., 503-233-4181.

By now, almost no one was left of our crew. Two of us pulled our bikes from the racks by Voodoo Doughnut and pedaled aimlessly on our busted fifth gears to the city’s cheapest and friendliest patio bar for viciously alcoholic and wonderful creamsicle slushies— only $4, with enough vodka to get the same chemical tang as an actual old-school Creamsicle. Outside, a couple punched endlessly, confusedly at the locking keypad of a bike whose orange was less creamsicle, more Nike (RGB 233, 88, 20, according to the Nike brand guide). One try, two tries, three, but they couldn’t figure it out and lost interest. No BikeTown for you. MK. Ride time from the Handy Slut: 3 minutes. Estimated calories burned: 15. Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

Willamette Week Presents

Silent Disco • Drink Specials • Pizza & Popcorn • Blue Moon Hour 7pm–8pm • And More! First 100 people to RSVP will receive a collectable Blue Moon glass! | RSVP at bit.ly/WWbluemoon21

wednesday

July

7pm to late!

4058 N Mississippi Ave.

Thursday Geeks Who Drink Trivia 20

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

Friday Movie niGhT

saTurday Movie niGhT

STREET

PDX POP NOW UNDER THE HAWTHORNE BRIDGE. PHOTOS BY B R IDGET B A KER www.wweek.com/street

Shandong www.shandongportland.com

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

“We just always feel bad—about everything. page 31

goinG ’nuts: Vegans are up in arms about the hiring practices of Portland’s Pip’s Original doughnut shop. The owners wrote that they were “relentlessly cyber-bullied” and subjected to “fear and intimidation tactics” after a job posting that said the shop didn’t want to hire people with “non-medical, non-religious dietary restrictions,” which would seem to exclude vegans and non-celiacs on gluten-free diets. Pip’s said those lifestyles “would stop you from tasting, accurately representing our treats and maintaining quality control.” Hundreds have commented on the Facebook page, some voicing support and others promising to boycott the shop, asserting that Pip’s is breaking anti-discrimination laws. Co-owner Nate Snell declined to comment July 25, saying he’d already received too many phone calls from people on both sides of the issue.

C o u rtes y of P ip ’ s O rigina l F aceboo k

starters

bite-sized portland culture news.

BIKE BATTLE: Gentrifying North Williams Avenue has been at the center of bike-centric controversy for years. The new BikeTown kiosks appear to have again raised tensions, as someone slashed the tires of at least six BikeTown bicycles parked at the New Seasons Market on Williams during the second day the bike-share program was in operation, according to a New Seasons employee. Williams has a fraught history with bicycles. In the summer of 2011, a plan to remove one car lane became a flash point for longtime residents of the Boise-Eliot neighborhood, who saw the bike project as a symbol of development displacing black families from North Portland. Also in 2011, someone tossed thumbtacks into the bike lanes on North Williams and Vancouver avenues, flattening dozens of bicycle tires. R.I.P. CITY: Bim Ditson may have failed to become Portland’s first mohawked mayor, but he still found a way to get into the history books—by organizing a world record-setting game of H-O-R-S-E. It should prove easier than winning elected office, considering there is no record currently on the books. “We went through the lengthy application process with the Guinness World Records people, and we will have them onsite,” Ditson says. The game will take place in the street outside Bunk Bar on Saturday, July 30, and will be played on the hoop affixed to Ditson’s band’s tour van, which it uses for its annual local-music Rigsketball tournament. But it will not technically be a game of H-O-R-S-E. “Since this is Rigsketball, and on our regulation-height hoop on the rig, we’ll be playing to R-I-P,” Ditson says, “because this rips!” The game starts at 2 pm, and the public is encouraged to participate. It will be followed by this year’s Rigsketball final and performances by nine bands, including Magic Sword, Aan and Mic Capes. BALLS OUT: Pabst Blue Ribbon is getting its own pinball machine, and at MusicfestNW Presents Project Pabst, you can play it. The Pabst Can Crusher made its debut at Comic-Con in San Diego last week. The machine was made by Stern Pinball, the oldest pinball manufacturer in the world. It features artwork by renowned punk artist “Dirty” Donny Gillies, and it features songs from Portland metal lords Red Fang, including tracks from the band’s upcoming album, Only Ghosts. The game will be available to play at Tom McCall Waterfront Park during the festival Aug. 27-28 in Project Pabst’s vintage arcade, among dozens of other classic games. 22

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

Headout

WHAT TO DO THIS WEEK IN ARTS & CULTURE

THURSDAY JULY 28 Portland International Cider Cup

[CIDER] In the inaugural blindtasted cider contest, seven ciders will get gold medals— and you get to taste all seven. Reverend Nat’s will also offer a cider cocktail, while Widmer will offer snacks. Widmer Brothers Brewery, 929 N Russell St., 503-281-2437. 5:30-8 pm. $18.

SATURDAY JULY 30 Converge 45 Afterparty with S1

[ART MEET ART] Converge 45 is trying to be the new Art Basel, and while most of its artsy events cost more than your weekly groceries, this afterparty has the potential to rock Portland’s art scene for just $5. The EDM-heavy underground art gallery S1 takes over Pacific Northwest College of Art with deep bass inspired by Mexico and digital art that looks like anemic blood cells floating in an LSD Champagne cocktail. PNCA, 511 NW Broadway, 503-226-4391. 9 pm. $5-$15.

BY M AT T H E W KO R F H AGE

mkorfhage@wweek.com

The Oregon Brewers Festival, which takes over Tom McCall Waterfront Park for five days starting July 27, is the biggest fest in Oregon—one of the oldest and probably the largest outdoor beer fest in the country, with 111 beers ranging from traditional Czech Pilsners and Leipziger goses to, like, mint julep beer and beer made with pesto. Which is to say, it’s a very big deal. The many local breweries tend to pull out the stops and brew special beers, because 80,000 people from all over the world come to try them—along with craft brews from as far away as China, Japan and the Netherlands. There is no admission fee, and after you get a cup for $7, each taste is a mere buck. It’s a gigantic clusterfuck, and it’s terrific. But like anything big, it has haters. We talked to one, local man Walker MacMurdo.

WW: What’s your beef?

Walker MacMurdo: When I visited on a Friday last year, the grounds were a swelteringly hot, overcrowded, overlarge, dust-choked clusterfuck of a beer festival. I’d recently enjoyed the Portland Craft Beer Festival in Fields Park, which was a fraction of the size, and the contrast stuck out immediately.

The Country’s Biggest and Oldest Outdoor Beer Festival Hits Portland Today.

We Talked to a Hater.

So your problem is…you’ll be drinking beer on what’s essentially the city’s hugest beer patio, in the summer, next to the river, in 80-degree weather?

Patio, my ass. It’s a fairground that takes 20 minutes to cross. And the river would be nice if not for the infernal dirt. That, and the crowd isn’t exactly the normal beer fest crowd either. I saw at least five variations on cutoff T-shirts that said “STOMP MY FLAG, I’LL STOMP YOUR ASS.”

That’s awesome.

The people who go to the Oregon Brewers Festival believe people will stomp on flags in front of them. The whole thing was Donald Trump’s beer fest.

From the brewers’ perspective, it’s putting their beer in front of people who otherwise never see it. You just want to drink beers with 17 guys named Rodney?

I’m not attacking the concept of the beer festival. But is it worth digging the gems out of a hot, sprawling mess? If you put the world’s best beer festival inside a Tilt-a-Whirl, would it be worth it? The OBF is a total state fair midway. But it sacrifices every nice thing about a beer fest, which is that it’s a way to drink a bunch of rare beers without being trapped in a sandstorm.

Pokémon Go Party

[GAME ON] Ground Kontrol is not the only bar obsessed with incense and gyms now, but it’s the only one throwing an epic Sunday-night party with trainer challenges, Poké-inspired food and drinks, and a photo booth. Come dressed as a Zubat and collect ’em all. Ground Kontrol, 511 NW Couch St., 503-7969364. 7 pm. Free. 21+.

I L L U S T R AT I O N B Y R I C K V O D I C K A

Opposing Brews

SUNDAY JULY 31

Harry Potter Release Party

There are six things like that every week. This is pretty much the biggest outdoor beer fest in the country. You don’t complain when Oktoberfest is a drunken carnival. You go because it’s a drunken carnival. Also, sandstorms? Seriously?

When I went to get the beer, the lines were invariably extremely long, especially if you want anything halfway across the country or the world. And it’s an endless expanse of countless stalls.

On the bright side, it’s an endless expanse of countless stalls. And each one has a beer you’ll never see again. There’s craft beer from Japan. Brewers who flew in from the Netherlands. Craft beer from China. China! Just go at 2 pm Thursday, when it’s less crowded.

I went when I could. That’s when normal people get to go to these things. Not everyone is a highfalutin alternative journalist who gets to go whenever he wants.

Take a damn day and drink. The nerds are there early, and there’s so much beer. Beerfests should be generally enjoyable whenever—but, oh, I guess it’s fine if there’s nerds there.

[BOOKS] The new Harry Potter and the Cursed Child script releases today at Powell’s— set 19 years in the future, with shocking revelations! And so, midnight release party, in Harry Potter fashion. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 800-878-7323. 12:01 am. Free.

MONDAY AUG. 1 Black Milk

[INDIE RAP] With a jazz-funk revival in full swing, hip-hop’s modern marriage of political consciousness and live beats owes some credit to Black Milk. The 32-year-old Detroit rapper born Curtis Cross applies an improvisational ethos to the mostly acoustic production of his latest release, The Rebellion Sessions, a funky fusion that appeals to young and old heads alike. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 503-231-9663. 9 pm. $17. 21+.

TUESDAY AUG. 2 AlunaGeorge

[SYNTH POP] London EDM duo AlunaGeorge is best known for being featured on Disclosure’s 2013 single “White Noise,” but its idiosyncratic spin on modern electronica, uber-catchy pop and supersmooth R&B bursts with ideas. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., 503-284-8686. 8:30 pm. $20. 21+.

The Oregon Brewers Festival is at Tom McCall Waterfront Park on Wednesday-Sunday, July 27-31. $7 for a cup, $1 for each 4-ounce taste. Cash only. Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

food & drink = WW Pick. Highly recommended. By Matthew Korfhage. Editor: MARTIN CIZMAR. Email: dish@wweek.com. See page 3 for submission instructions.

Simple ApproAch

Bold FlAvor vegan Friendly

open 11-10

everyday

WEDNESDAY, JULy 27

THURSDAY, JULy 28

Buoy Beer Saloon Pop-Up

Maine, the Way Life Should Be

For five days during the Oregon Brewers Festival, River Pig Saloon will be the Buoy Beer Saloon. Only Astorian Buoy beers will be served—14 of them, including the hard-to-get Helles flagship. Fish and chips and oyster shooters will be on the menu, Astoria liquor from Pilot House will be served, and on Wednesday, Buoy folks will be hanging out with their beers. Expect OBF beer Dragon Weisse, plus shizz you don’t get in Portland: Benedict Cumberbatch, kolsch, barrel-aged hellesbock, rice beer, whatever. River Pig Saloon, 529 NW 13th Ave., 971-266-8897.

12th of Never Can Release

Lagunitas Brewing Co. has discovered a strange aluminium (as the Brits say it) vessel in which beer may be stored. It is called a “can.” They are putting some beer in it for the first time, in quantities of 12. The beer is called “12th of Never,” and because they’re stoners from California, the can release is at 4:20 pm. Tin Bucket, 3520 N Williams Ave., 503-477-7689. 4:20-10 pm.

Oregon Brewers Festival

NOW OPEN IN SLABTOWN! NEW LUNCH AND HAPPY HOURS

Taste the best damn ciders in the West (including, grudgingly, Canada and Idaho). Among 26 different cidery contenders, seven ciders won gold medals during the award ceremony, and you get to taste all seven. Reverend Nat’s will also offer up a cider cocktail, while Widmer will offer snacks. Ticket are available at picc2016awardsparty.bpt.me. Widmer Brothers Brewery, 929 N Russell St., 503-281-2437. 5:30-8 pm. $18.

SATURDAY, JULy 30 Bailey’s Barrel-Aged Block Party

In the middle of one of the most packed beer weekends in Portland—with the Oregon Brewers Festival nearby—Bailey’s Taproom will throw down with a 32-deep, barrel-aged beer fest that spills out into the street with piñatas and Santeria tacos, plus cornhole. Among the brewers represented are Breakside, Block 15, Firestone Walker and a whole grip of locals, not to mention Baird and Dewar cider. Admission is free. Bailey’s Taproom, 213 SW Broadway, 503-295-1004. Noon.

pizza | bar | charcuterie

1505 NW 21st Ave. | (503) 946-1853 | please-louise.com

Fillmore Trattoria

Italian Home Cooking Tuesday–Saturday 5:30PM–10PM closed Sunday & Monday

1937 NW 23RD Place Portland, OR 97210 24

Portland International Cider Cup Awards Party

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

(971) 386-5935

thomas teal

}

500 NW 21st Ave, (503) 208-2173 kungpowpdx.com

The Oregon Brewers Festival may be the biggest fest in Oregon— one of the oldest and probably the largest outdoor beer fest in the country, with 111 beers ranging from traditional Czech Pilsner and Leipziger goses to mint julep beer and beer made with pesto. Which is to say, it’s a very big deal. 80,000 people from all over the world come to try them— along with craft brews from as far away as China, Japan and the Netherlands. There is no admission fee, and after you get a cup for $7, each taste is a mere buck. It’s a gigantic clusterfuck, and it’s terrific. Tom McCall Waterfront Park, oregonbrewfest.com. Noon-9 pm. Through July 31.

In a meal of two Portlands, chef (and new owner!) at Ava Gene’s, Joshua McFadden, joins L.A. chef Sarah Kramer (Madcapra) to cook up an a la carte menu based on a trip the pair took to Lake Megunticook in Maine for Bon Appetit magazine. So, like, idyllic seafaring hick food with a funny accent—fried fish sandwiches with lobster mayo, “faux lobster pho,” a lamb gyro and other lakeside Nor’easterly things. Ava Gene’s, 377 SE Division St., 971-229-0571. 5-11 pm.

1. Fukami

4246 SE Belmont St., 971-279-2161, fukamipdx.com. The old Hokusei has reopened into what’s almost certainly the finest dedicated sushiya in town, with $65 and $85 manycourse omakase menus, and beautiful drink pairings and cocktails. $$$$.

2. Hat Yai

4. Please Louise

3. Southpark

5. Jouk Li Jou

1605 NE Killingsworth St., 503-764-9701. Thai chicken and curries with fresh, earthy, complex flavors—and some really killer, flaky fried chicken. $$. 901 SW Salmon St., 503-326-1300, southparkseafood.com. Southpark’s got a new oyster bar with 13 varietals—but the real draw is the updated menu with newly ambitious small plates like a great octopus-and-blood sausage plate with melon. $$$.

1505 NW 21st Ave., 503-946-1853. Please Louise is bringing fine artisan pizza to underserved Slabtown—with a nice country terrine besides. $$. 1505 NE Alberta St., 340-244-4802. At Portland’s only Haitian spot, get impossibly cheap $5 pork tenderloin or chicken—plus a fiery blend of habanero cabbage and carrots called pikliz. $.

review

Land of Ice and Snow It’s hot, and shave ice is the solution. Here’s where to get it. Shave ice is to a snow cone what Hillary is to Trump— more evolved, more refined, more excellent in every way. Shave ice is also older, made using a Japanese technique dating to the eighth century and later introduced to places like Hawaii and Taiwan. Properly made, it requires shaving a pristine cube into tiny slivers, resulting in a textural masterpiece delivered in any of countless flavors. To help you cool off from the newly hot Portland summer, we visited every shave-ice spot we could find within Portland city limits, eating whatever item shavers told us was their favorite—from basic P.O.G. (pineapple-orangeguava) to fruity ice sundaes that’d make Carmen Miranda blush. We also trekked to Beaverton to try the new bigcity trend in shave ice, Taiwanese snow.

Wailua Shave Ice

1212 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 808-652-9394, wailuashaveice.com. Open Saturdays only. You might not know it to see the mostly ice-plus-syrup offerings in Portland, but shave ice in Hawaii can go seriously wildstyle—especially at Original Big Island Shave Ice Co. in Waimea, whose lines stretch as far as the ones at Voodoo. Wailua Shave Ice, Saturdays only at the popup cart in the Hawthorne Lardo parking lot, is the only Hawaiian-style cart we found inside the city that lets its imagination go bonkers with composed shave-ice sundaes. Its $6 Lava Flow is the finest shave-ice concoction I’ve had in town, period—Taiwanese, Hawaiian or whatever—pineapple-juice shave ice topped with strawberry and pineapple chunks on top, strawberry sauce and the coup de grâce, coconut fluff. Wailua uses juice and purees on its fruit ice—no industrial-style syrup—which means its P.O.G. variant is made with pineapple and orange juice plus guava puree, topped with fresh starfruit. Meanwhile, the Almond Joy-themed shave ice stacks coconut milk, Nutella, almonds and roasted coconut.

EC Kitchen

6335 SE 82nd Ave., 503-788-6306, eckitchenllc.com. EC Kitchen is best known for its housemade Taiwanese sausages, not to mention a wealth of Taiwanese fare from beef noodle to braised pork-belly rice. But on hot summer days, you’re just as likely to see the local Chinese and Vietnamese communities digging into huge bowls of Taiwanese shave ice—whether two old ladies or a teenage couple on a sweetly nervous date. You can get the red bean or peanut versions for $4.95, but what you really want is the fresh fruit. Season permitting, $8 gets you a big candy mountain of rich tapiocatopped, terrifically airy shave ice (more than enough for two), topped with about a half-pound of fresh strawberries and blueberries. It is the closest 82nd Avenue gets to heaven.

Ohana Hawaiian Cafe

6320 NE Sandy Blvd., 503-335-5800, ohanahawaiiancafe.com. This sunny Roseway Hawaiian spot with a sit-down counter is home to the airiest shave ice in town. It uses the same iceshaving machine as multiple other spots, so the difference is all temp and technique. Either way, the texture is so ethereal it’s almost feathery, and the mango syrup is sweet but not over-sticky or cloying. Really, it’s a perfect no-frills shave ice, with the $4 “small” piled ridiculously high in the same plastic Day-Glo-colored tulip cup used by most places in town. I have not seen the $6 large, which you are warned on the menu not to split, though many ordered smalls. Housemade coconut ice cream on top? That’s $1.25 more. A word of advice, though: Hang on tight to your cup. It’s so heavy with ice that tipping is all too easy, and you’ll be left with a saddening ice amputee. “I tried to warn you,” said my server, before offering to top off my cup.

Mauna Kea

5205 SE Foster Road, 971-352-7989. This humble Hawaiian-style cart at Carts on Foster has the largest portions of anybody in town. Served in a black plastic boat of a bowl, the cherry shave ice—the owner’s personal recommendation—might as well have been the Three Sisters peaks all together, a sledge of ice and syrup for $5, with consistency in the middle ground of shave-ice shops. As I ate, the owner listened politely while a chef from the island gave him pointers on his mac salad: No

Mo Cha Tea House

14900 SW Barrows Road, Suite 101, Beaverton, 503-530-8713. Snow is the new Asian variant that’s suddenly popular in Brooklyn and L.A.—but to get it in Portland, we had to travel to Beaverton to brand-new Mo Cha Tea House, a bright Taiwanese dessert place brimming with teenagers. Taiwanese-style snow is like shave ice, in that it’s ice and it’s shaved—but instead of just water, it’s frozen with 1 percent milk, with flavor already added. When the machine shaves the ice, the creaminess of the milk keeps it together, so it comes out in folded ice-milk ribbons, like a millefeuille of ice and cream. It’s available in flavors like matcha with the earthy Asian adzuki bean added— both delectable and strange in turn, with a texture somewhere between whipped air and Play-Doh.

wailua shave ice

Ate-Oh-Ate

2454 E Burnside St., 503-445-6101, ate-oh-ate.com. Ate-Oh-Ate’s shave-ice texture is oddly variable, from silken to crunch. At happy hour from 4 to 6 pm daily, it’ll make you a heaping pyramid of shave ice soaked in rum for a mere $5 (it’s $8 otherwise, $4 for the shave ice and $4 for the rum). It’s also one of the few places to offer traditional adzuki beans as an earthy counterpoint. But if you’re getting the open-air rum slushie, you want a flavor that’ll support the rum. Try the P.O.G. or the mango, and let the kids—if you’ve got them—crunch down the redyellow-blue rainbow flavor: “You can’t have Mommy’s shave ice, sorry. This is shave ice for grown-ups.”

Ice Mama

ATE-OH-ATE

624 NE Killingsworth St., 503-358-1223. The Piedmont pod’s Ice Mama is a pretty pink cart with little pictures of Jesse Owens and Zora Neale Hurston decorating the window’s edge. It’s the only shave-ice spot we’re aware of in inner North and Northeast. The cart’s exuberantly friendly owner, Saqualla Allen, serves about 20 different flavors, including cotton candy, something called “Miss Bliss” and Key lime pie, her

thomas teal

mkorfhage@wweek.com

clifford king

BY M AT T H E W KO R F H AGE

favorite. It’s $4 for 4 ounces, low in the tulip cup, and $5 for a bigger heap. But I’d recommend getting the rich, custardy ice cream—a buck extra—atop a small cup. The ice is a bit granular and snow-coney on its own, but the creaminess and crunch and fruit flavor all together are brilliant.

mustard, Best Foods-brand mayonnaise, loads of white pepper, rinse the pasta in cider vinegar, and get your sweetness from carrots and celery.

Herb’s Mac and Cheese

4262 SE Belmont St., Portland, 503-622-9090. Herb’s Hawaiian Shave Ice is currently operating out of Herb’s Mac and Cheese cart; it used to be two different carts right next to each other. It uses the same exact shave-ice maker as Ohana for its stacked $4 shave-ice mountains, but somehow the texture on its face-tatted maker’s preferred cherry was as much snow cone as shave, a cardinal shave-ice sin. That said, Herb’s throws on so much syrup it half-melts the ice into sweet goo, which is its own kind of smoothness. Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

MUSIC PROFILE

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

COURTESY OF BJ THE CHICAGO KID

Prices listed are sometimes for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and socalled convenience charges may apply. Event lineups are subject to change after WW’s press deadlines. Editor: MATTHEW SINGER. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, go to wweek.com/ submitevents and follow submission directions. All shows should be submitted two weeks or more in advance of event. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: msinger@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

WEDNESDAY, JULY 27 John Paul White, the Secret Sisters

[BACKWOODS BLUES] Known for his work in folk outfit Civil Wars, John Paul White just released his first solo album in a decade. Beulah is an incredibly intimate story in the key of blues, with occasional forays into Southern rock and gospel. And trust him you should, as the guy has collaborated with Jason Isbell, Rosanne Cash, Emmylou Harris and others. Sometimes, it’s nice to see a founding member of a popular act step away and demonstrate what got him there in the first place. MARK STOCK. Star Theater, 13 NW 6th Ave. 8 pm. $15. 21+.

Thirsty City: Durazzo, Anechoic, Bones, Matryoshka, Yunzumz

[TRANSLANTIC HEAT] Thirsty City has always been about bridging the gaps between talented producers and low-key MCs, and tonight is no exception. This edition of the monthly hip-hop series serves as a release party for the MUC2PDX cassette, a compilation split between talent out of a few Munich, Germany and local heads. As the debut release by BummClack records, the tape is a quick introduction to Portland’s resident abstract beat-heads, many of whom are just at home throwing down a live set as they are behind the decks in the studio, with MPC wiz Durazzo headlining. WYATT SCHAFFNER. The Know, 2026 NE Alberta St. 8 pm. $5. 21+.

Jim Lauderdale

[SINGER-SONGWRITER] What the hell is Jim Lauderdale doing at the White Eagle? All due respect to the homey, historic joint, but this mighty songwriter could headline the Grand Ole Opry back home in Nashville and by rights, ought to be as famous as George Jones. Lauderdale has spent much of the recent past in collaboration, penning several albums with Grateful Dead lyricist Robert Hunter and recording a duet disc with Buddy Miller. But he needs no help to be proliﬁc—dude’s released no fewer than ﬁve albums from 2013 to 2015, one of them a double. JEFF ROSENBERG. White Eagle Saloon, 836 N Russell St. 8 pm. $15. 21+.

THURSDAY, JULY 28 “Weird Al” Yankovic

[RE-YANKOVIC] Over the past four decades, Weird Al has cemented his reputation as the best comedian in rock. His wit remains razor-sharp, he’s retained the same backing band since 1981, and his latest album, Mandatory Fun, was his first No. 1. Anyone who bought a ticket before this gig sold out can expect a flawless retrospective show, with classic parodies, pastiches and originals from all eras of Al’s catalog. The only bummer is for fans that saw him at the Oregon Zoo last year—this set is the exact same—hence the truth in its title, “The Return of the Mandatory Fun Tour.” That just sounds a little bit less fun than seeing it the first time. See you in the soaking pool. Edgefield, 2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale. 6:30 pm. Sold out. All ages.

The Space Lady Plays to “Science Is Fiction”

[SYNTH FOLK] After decades performing on the streets of Boston and San Francisco, the Space Lady has earned the distinction as one of America’s premier “outsider artists.” With ethereal ballads like “Synthesize Me,” she is renowned for crafting exquisite spells with only a Casio keyboard and a few eﬀects pedals. Call it lo-ﬁ, “freak folk,” synth pop: Given the hypnotic treatment of golden oldies like “Radar Love,” the charm of her lilted voice and light-

up winged hat renders genre irrelevant. The Space Lady returns to Portland for the very special occasion of soundtracking the sci-fi noir films of Jean Painlevé in the final installment of Mississippi Records’ Music and Film Series for 2016. WYATT SCHAFFNER. Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy Blvd. 7:30 pm. $10. All ages.

Moving Units presents the Songs of Joy Division, Viktor Fiction, Gold Casio

[WELL-KNOWN PLEASURES] To a degree, L.A.’s Moving Units were the West Coast’s answer to the largely New York-dominated post-punk revival of the early aughts. A decade removed from its glory days, the band takes the next logical step in its transparent Joy Division worship by ﬁnally becoming an all-out Joy Division tribute band. When it isn’t impersonating the moody Mancunians, it’ll also be playing songs from its latest eﬀort, Damage With Care—a sprawling, ambitious LP that leans a little more toward the post-Ian Curtis career of New Order in mood and tempo but could easily soundtrack a GIF of his famous stage-twitching, sped up to double time. CRIS LANKENAU. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave. 9 pm. $12 advance, $14 day of show. 21+.

FRIDAY, JULY 29 Ozomatli

[LATIN UNITY] Ozomatli would be the best damn wedding band on the planet. Playing an eclectic and original mix of reggae, hip-hop, Latin music and various other dance-inducing grooves the world over, the members of the L.A. sextet have made a living inspiring smiles—and countless embarrassing dance moves— for more than two decades. Hopeful, long-term advocates for workers’ rights and various other social-justice causes, the band uses its uplifting power to do as much good as possible, unifying and empowering audiences into mutual respect by way of collective sonic ecstasy. PARKER HALL. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. 9 pm. $28 advance, $30 day of show. Under 21 permitted with legal guardian.

Patrice Pike, Raina Rose

[SINGER-SONGWRITER] Both artists on this bill hail from Austin but have Portland connections, though Pike’s are far more tangential. Rose is a Rose City native who cut her folkie teeth here before decamping to the Texas music mecca. Pike’s connection to Portland music is by virtue of having competed against our own Storm Large in the 2006 reality show Rock Star: Supernova. (Neither won, though Large lasted two weeks longer.) After her band Sister 7’s brush with major labeldom via Clive Davis at the turn of the millennium, Pike has sustained a sturdy solo career. JEFF ROSENBERG. Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St. 8 pm. $12 advance, $15 day of show. Under 21 permitted with legal guardian.

Green Velvet, Sean Majors, Gabriel Driscoll

[HOUSE] When Curtis Jones created his Green Velvet alias, he’d already put his stamp on Chicago’s house scene. In the ‘90s, as Cajmere, Jones helped bring the genre back to life in the city. Dying his mohawk the color of a Chia Pet, he developed the Green Velvet guise as an outlet for the more ﬂamboyant—and humorous—side of his personality, while the productions maintain his signature streamlined and vintage club stylings. MATTHEW SINGER. Euphoria Nightclub, 315 SE 3rd Ave. 10 pm. $15 advance, $20 day of show. 21+.

CONT. on page 29

The Gospel of Grind Mind. A uniquely powerful blend of classic Stax soul and neo-R&B, the album straddles generations of sounds without ever feeling forced. Although it features guest appearances from Lamar, Chance and Big K.R.I.T., it’s Sledge’s soft vocals that draw BY PA R KER HA LL @pwhall you in, and his openness keeps you listening. On songs like “Church,” he relays the internal struggle Bryan James Sledge has never busted a rhyme on between religious salvation and earthly temptarecord before, but he probably has your favorite tion—a classic soul-music dichotomy—when going to church in the morning leads to a night of drugs rapper on speed dial. A born-and-raised veteran of the Windy City’s and women. He is unfailingly honest throughout. famed R&B circuit, the singer known as BJ the Shoot, on the record’s intro track, he even declares his fear of spider webs. Chicago Kid has spent the past decade collaborating with a roll call of modIn a music world brimming with wanern hip-hop monoliths. From his nabes, it is Sledge’s authenticity that initial big break—a 2006 feahas drawn high-level rappers to his “I UNDERSTAND ture on Kanye West’s Mission: doorstep. But it’s also made him THERE ARE VERY Impossible III theme—to recent feel like an outsider. FEW LIKE ME WHO collaborations with Kendrick “I understand there are very KINDA CHILL, AND Lamar, Chance the Rapper and few like me who kinda chill, and LOVE THE MUSIC AND Anderson Paak, the gospellove the music and are here for ARE HERE tinged sounds that permeate the music,” he says. “And it can Sledge’s world have expanded be hard. There’s a lot of people FOR THE MUSIC.” well beyond his hometown. who are caught up in the life—the —BJ THE CHICAGO KID But for the 31-year-old, the chains, the blunts, the whole nine. decade between moving to Los I feel like, if you like something, you Angeles to pursue his dreams and indeshould just like it—not because it’s a cool pendently releasing his first solo effort—2012’s thing to have as an accessory to being a rapper. critically hailed Pineapple Now-Laters—hasn’t “Music, because it’s a feeling and not somebeen a leisurely stroll through a personal trophy thing you can see, you have the ability to tell if room as much as a steady grind. it’s real or not, or if somebody’s a good-ass actor, “It’s kinda like The Little Engine That Could, you know?” he continues, chuckling. “We’re all you know,” Sledge says while preparing for a sold- inspired by someone, but that inspiration should out show in New York. “All of those songs were always shine in your own light.” steps in the stairs.” As Sledge continues on his first worldwide solo A son of church choir directors, Sledge left tour, hitting Portland before spending several Chicago for Los Angeles at age 19. Upon his arriv- weeks in Europe, he has much hope for the future— al, he worked as a backup singer for gospel duo for himself, and for friends like Lamar, Chance and Mary Mary, eventually finding his way onto Stevie Paak. Still, at the end of the day, popularity and Wonder’s 2005 album A Time to Love. Over the next sales are the least of their concerns, he says. seven years, Sledge recorded and released three “We just want to make better music than we mixtapes and appeared on more than 25 singles for did yesterday, man,” he says. “I think that’s simply other artists, before signing to Motown and prep- what it is.” ping his breakthrough, this year’s In My Mind. In conversation, there is a pleasant earnestness SEE IT: BJ the Chicago Kid plays Star Theater, 13 NW 6th Ave., with Elhae, on Thursday, July 28. 9 to the way Sledge relates his success story, and that pm. $18. All ages. tender-hearted introspection extends to In My

BJ THE CHICAGO KID IS NO OVERNIGHT SUCCESS—IT JUST SEEMS THAT WAY.

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

MUSIC SATURDAY, JULY 30

Rigsketball Musicfest: Magic Sword, Aan, Mic Capes, Chugger, the Lower 48, Ah God, Fog Father, Laura Palmer’s Death Parade, Ali Muhareb’s Mujahedeen

[B-BALL BONANZA] Surely, you’ve seen And And And’s sweet ride. It’s a van equipped with a retractable basketball hoop that brings the sport of “Rigsketball” to unsuspecting fellow bands and fans while on tour. Each year, drummer Bim Ditson orchestrates a March Madness-style tournament involving the local music scene, with the early rounds taking place at PDX Pop Now and the finals occurring in the street outside Bunk Bar, often fit with an impressive cast of live music. This year’s lineup includes experimental pop outfit Aan and Boise’s cloaked electronic maestros Magic Sword, among seven others. The music starts at 4:20 pm and the Rigsketball finals commence at 7, but get there at 2 to witness what’s being promoted as a “World RecordSetting Game of H-O-R-S-E.” MARK STOCK. Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water Ave. 2 pm. Free. All ages.

Satan’s Pilgrims, the Boss Martians, the Sellwoods, DJ Major Sean

[SURF AND NERF] The devil has all the best tunes, it’s said, but the other guy usually grabs the family-friendly time slots. Less kind minds might wonder why Satan’s Pilgrims arranged for an all-ages precursor this evening—have they a children’s set? Is there a Senior Special?—but let’s just hope today’s teens have newly embraced garagesurf instrumentals styled after ’60s AM nuggets, yet redolent of ’90s Portland garage shows. There’s a lesson to be learned from any band stubbornly Venturing for decades

around dimming hometown crowds only to discover they’d earned a sort of global renown. Even when near-drowning in obscurity, keep paddling—you never know when the big wave’s about to hit. JAY HORTON. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St. 5 pm and 9 pm. $11 advance, $12 day of show. Early show is all ages, late show is 21+.

DJ Z-Trip, DJ Wicked, Sidestep

[MONSTER MASH] Consider the former Zach Sciacca something like EDM’s Buckethead. Trailing a welldeserved reputation as the DJ’s DJ, his skills behind the decks are second to none. He’s opened for the Rolling Stones, kept LL Cool J afloat during last year’s Fourth of July Foo Fighters stadium spectacular, energized tunes from a Grammy telecast’s worth of crossgenre superstars, and somehow still plays a barely advertised set at Euphoria. Best we can tell, the same all-access inclusivity and indifference to trends that led DJ Z-Trip to invent the mash-up—that longderided, undeniably affective performative melding of famous tracks from widely disparate genres—has led to bookings short on tastemaker venues and concordant acolytes. (Associated mash-upbased legal squabbles, like Monster. com’s sorta-unauthorized share of his Beastie Boys remix, haven’t helped.) In recent years, he’s won press attention only from live-scoring Harold Lloyd shorts during the past two Tribeca film fests. But when an artist can enliven silent film comedies through crate-digging acumen and unparalleled turntablism, little more needs be said. JAY HORTON. Euphoria Nightclub, 315 SE 3rd Ave. 10 pm. $15 advance, $25 day of show. 21+.

CONT. on page 31

COURTESY OF PRESS HERE PUBLICITY

PREVIEW

Weezer, Panic at the Disco,

Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness

[BEACH MEN] Twenty-two years (and an additional pair of eponymous color-coded releases) after Weezer’s self-titled debut—aka “The Blue Album”—wed punk pop to college rock with just enough grunge flavorings to charm the frat house, the paler-shade-ofCaucasian poster boys have finally recorded their “White Album.” Much as group godhead Rivers Cuomo surely enjoys dismissing Beatlemania associations, the collection actually doubles down on Beach Boys influences, name-checking the Golden State (and explicitly referencing Brian Wilson’s songcraft) throughout tunes that continue the relative return to form of 2014’s Everything Will Be Alright in the End—though energies have waned. Insofar as Weezer’s primary theme has always been its singer-songwriter’s near-arrogant declaration of romantic awkwardness, an actual no-foolin’ rock star’s determinedly studious take on the fairer sex was never not silly. And, having reportedly joined Tindr to fuel lyrical verisimilitude, the 45-year-old frontman has turned more than a little creepy. It’s no surprise the definitive California sound was written by a man-child trapped in a sandbox of his own making. Weezer, figurehead of a generation worldly before its time, limning innocence only through appropriated nostalgia, never did seem young, exactly. But their leader may finally be starting to get old. JAY HORTON. McMenamins Edgefield, 2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale, 503-669-8610. 6 pm Saturday, July 30. Sold out. All ages. Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

MUSIC [MEn oBSESSED] Reinterpreting the strange, intense fervency of Daniel Johnston has worked well for many of his notable acolytes thus far—see tV on the Radio’s reworking of “Walking the cow,” which elevated the original’s simplistic toy-keyboard naiveté to a gorgeous level of sonic sophistication, for example. While staking a claim at the entirety of Johnston’s daunting catalog could be a dubious prospect, Portland’s own Johnston disciples the Stupid tears are faithfully reviving some of his deepest cuts, and have even begun crowdsourcing for a group hajj to Austin, texas, the birthplace of Johnston’s career. Little Fury things, an ear-bleeding tribute to Dinosaur Jr.’s more melodic ‘90s output, shares the bill. cRIS LAnKEnAU. The Firkin Tavern, 1937 SE 11th Ave. 7 pm. Free. 21+.

INTRODUCING c o U R t E SY o F FAc E B o o K

The Stupid Tears (Daniel Johnston tribute), Little Fury Things (Dinosaur Jr. tribute), Bandha Feahr

fetcheyewear.com | 877.274.0410

SUNDAY, JULY 31 Modest Mouse, Brand New

[tHE LonESoME cRoWDED MAInStREAM] Modest Mouse finally released Strangers to Ourselves—the Portland band’s sixth album and first in eight years—last year after much deliberation and revision. the album itself falls comfortably in the post“Float on” category of a band so ubiquitous in indie circles it seemed like they’d made it big even before they actually broke the Billboard top 10. Gone is the toolbox percussion, Isaac Brock’s squeaky vocals and the band’s original roster—but what this far less modest incarnation lacks qualitatively it makes up for in quantity, expanding its touring lineup to six members. Long Island emo vets Brand new, meanwhile, co-headline on the heels of their much-anticipated single “I Am a nightmare” and a merch table featuring t-shirts eulogizing their own career, slated to end in 2018. At the rate they’re releasing new music currently, that doesn’t bode well for any gushy young punks holding their breath for a whole album. cRIS LAnKEnAU. Moda Center, 1 N Center Court St. 7 pm. $39.50-$71.11. All ages.

Madeleine Peyroux

[contEMPoRARY cHAntEUSE] Madeleine Peyroux has long since established her sleepy, smoky style of cabaret jazz and blues, so I got a chuckle out of reading on Allmusic. com—incorrectly, it turns out—that her forthcoming release would be titled Everything I Do Gonh Be Funky (From Now On). As it happens, that Allen toussaint song is just one on the track list of an album coming out in September, Secular Hymns, in which, with Peyroux’s usual catholic and unerring choice of repertoire, it will be joined by tunes from the likes of townes Van Zandt, tom Waits, reggae poet Linton Kwesi Johnson, and rock’n’-roll architect Sister Rosetta tharpe. JEFF RoSEnBERG. Revolution Hall, 1300 SE Stark St., No. 110. 8 pm. $46. Under 21 permitted with legal guardian.

MONDAY, AUG. 1 Black Milk and Nat Turner, Blossom, Maze Koroma

[InDEPEnDEnt HIP-HoP] With a jazz-funk revival in full swing, hiphop’s modern marriage of political consciousness and live beats owes some credit to Black Milk. the 32-yearold Detroit rapper born curtis cross comes from the same core of soul samples as J Dilla, applying an improvisational ethos to the mostly acoustic production of his latest release, the mostly instrumental The Rebellion Sessions. Flanked live by his band nat turner, cross can invigorate his classics onstage with a vital message of positivity, infused with a funky fusion flavor that appeals to young and old heads alike. WYAtt ScHAFFnER. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St. 9 pm. $17. 21+.

cont. on page 33

Blesst Chest WHO: Jay Winebrenner (guitar), Darrell Bourque (bass), Jake Morris (drums). FOR FANS OF: The Mars Volta, Máscaras, Syd Barrett-era Pink Floyd. SOUNDS LIKE: The musty, sweat-rusted weight room at the barracks of an army of Egyptian pharaohs training for the apocalypse on the rings of Saturn…or something like that. Jake Morris has an aversion to humblebragging. In the hour we talked about his instrumental prog trio, Blesst Chest, the drummer recalled a decade spent in service of minimum-wage day jobs and shoestring-budget tours, but never once specifically referenced the band’s collective résumé. Morris and bassist Darrell Bourque spent years in local quartet Joggers, while guitarist Jay Winebrenner played in the captivating, theatrical math-rock trio 31 Knots. Both bands enjoyed critical praise and modest notoriety, and found distribution through highly respected outlets like Polyvinyl and Star Time International. But Morris downplays any musical accomplishment. He even referenced “this other band I’m also in that keeps me touring constantly,” without specifying that it’s Stephen Malkmus and the Jicks. On the other hand, considering Blesst Chest’s formation was more a sigh of relief for three guys in their 40s who’d already sacrificed their early adulthood to indie rock, maybe those past endeavors are not entirely relevant. “This was just something we did to get Jay out of the house,” Morris says. “Our goals changed. It was like, ‘Let’s play a show and only play for 13 minutes.’ That was our first goal as a band—like, ‘13 minutes, fuck yeah!’” After accomplishing that feat, next up was making a record. Blesst Chest’s upcoming debut, Wish We Were There, has the rugged, wellrehearsed appeal that reflects the members’ experience, with all the brazen abandon of guys who’ve been around way too long to bother with poses. There’s a brainy aura to their agile noodling, with phrases of melody coming and going so quickly, and with such urgency, that even the most tuneful among them sounds like a battle cry. Making the album was another unceremonious affair, recorded in the basement of the makeshift studio where Blesst Chest practices, which also happens to be the home of Cribs bassist Gary Jarman, who served as engineer. Morris gives Jarman credit for capturing the band’s complex sound on record—which, given his penchant for modesty, is unsurprising. “He did all the work,” Morris says. “We got super-lucky. Most places just take your money and hit the button, but he made suggestions, made each song have its own palette, and fussed over it for, like, no money. We felt bad. We just always feel bad—about everything.” CRIS LANKENAU. SEE IT: Blesst chest plays Mississippi Studios, 3939 n Mississippi Ave., with Hot Victory and Plankton Wat, on Friday, July 29. 9 pm. $5. 21+.

Oregon’s Largest 2-Day Show!

JULY 30–31 $10 • Sat. 9-5, Sun. 10-4.

DOWNTOWN PORTLAND: 1036 W. Burnside St. • 222-34 18 HAWTHORNE DISTRICT: 1420 SE 37th Ave. • 234-1302 BUFFALOEXCHANGE.COM • Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

fo r

at io

LL A A R TO E M A Y ET N DI O Em TE D U V ai E A M li nq W A IN M ui R EE T re s K O ED to ET T IA K ad H ve IS I N E JU rt is G H in A N g@ IR F D K IE V IE w IN w LD ER L ee G k. co ! ? TI OO m SI K fo rm N I G N or e G in

MUSIC COURTESY OF DECKED OUT

dates here

Green Velvet plays Euphoria Nightclub on Friday, July 29.

TUESDAY, AUG. 2 Red Bull Sound Select: Metz, the Ghost Ease, Tango Alpha Tango

[NOISE ROCK] Since debuting in 2012, Canadian Sub Pop signees Metz have become a nationally recognized name in hardcore. The group’s eponymous debut and 2015 sophomore album, II, both garnered Polaris Prize nominations, and the band has earned a reputation for its experimentation and no-bullshit attack. Its songs are dark, winding, lo-fi and loud, but the true cause of all the hoopla and critical acclaim is the deep-cutting, highly infectious grooves, built from repetitive, minimalist drumming, screeching guitar and maximum angst. SHANNON GORMLEY. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 9 pm. $3 with RSVP at redbullsoundselect. com, $12 without. 21+.

AlunaGeorge, Kari Faux, Rejie Snow

[SYNTH POP] The first thing most people associate AlunaGeorge with is its being featured on Disclosure’s 2013 single, “White Noise”—a great track, but the London duo has way too much going for it to be thought of merely as guests on another artist’s song. The pair’s 2013 album, Body Music, put an idiosyncratic spin on modern electronica, uber-catchy pop and super-smooth R&B. Writing three-minute pop songs is not something the duo takes lightly—each song contains many different ideas, but the effect is effortless. The follow-up to Body Music, I Remember, comes out this September, and you can bet the extended time between albums means they aren’t skimping on the craft. SHANNON GORMLEY. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St. 8:30 pm. $20. 21+.

CLASSICAL, JAZZ & WORLD Chamber Music Northwest: Bryan Johanson

[NEW CLASSICAL] Veteran Portland composer-guitarist Bryan Johanson may be retired from his PSU teaching and administrative duties, but he’s

still busily arranging for and recording with his Oregon Guitar Quartet, and a commission from Chamber Music Northwest allowed him to write what he believes is the first work for clarinet and guitar quartet. Johnson’s new three-movement Five Ways In, One Way Out uses traditional classical forms (fugue, passacaglia, sonata) in a 21st-century original, played by the Oregon Guitar Quartet and Chamber Music Northwest artistic director and clarinetist David Shifrin. CMNW commissioned the New@ Noon concert’s other world premiere, Ascension, from one of its young Protégé Project composers, Andrew Hsu, who set Lola Ridge’s poem Altitude to music for mezzo soprano and string quartet as a response to his grief at the passing of someone close to him. Nathan Shields will play his own 2010 Variations for Piano, partly inspired by a T.S. Eliot poem. BRETT CAMPBELL. Lincoln Recital Hall at Portland State University, 1620 SW Park Ave. Noon Friday, July 28. $15. All ages.

Movies P.46

An Unlikely Muse: Brahms and Mühlfeld

[CLASSICAL] Entering his 70s, Johannes Brahms thought he was done with music. With his symphonic and choral masterpieces already behind him, the great Romantic composer was determined to exit the stage. Then he met a young clarinetist whose sensuous sound so beguiled him that he changed his mind—and inspired him to write some of his most sublime music. Playwright Harry Clark and actor Jack Gilpin take that dramatic turning point in Brahms’s life as the point of departure for a Chamber Music Northwest show that’s as much theater as concert, with an allstar team—renowned pianist André Watts, clarinetist David Shifrin and the Miró Quartet—weaving those gorgeous late-Brahms solo piano and chamber works, including the clarinet trio, quintet and sonata he wrote for Mühlfeld, in with the story. BRETT CAMPBELL. Lincoln Performance Hall, 1620 SW Park Ave. 8 pm Friday, July 28. $30-$60. All ages.

For more Music listings, visit Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

Indrajit Banerjee 8/4 • 8pm Considered one of the best sitarists in the world!

Dave Alvin

8/25 • 7:30pm

with Phil Alvin, Eliza Gilkyson, & Butch Hancock Plus Rick Shea, Christy McWilson & Cindy Cashdollar

Brian Cutean

8/26 • 8pm

featuring Lewi Longmire, Jason Montgomery, Simon Lucas & Nancy Tannler

The Lowest Pair

9/1 • 8pm

featuring the duo banjo picking of Kendl Winter & Palmer T. Lee

THEOLDCHURCH.ORG

“ONE BIG EXPLOSION OF TALENT AND SPECTACLE!” - Dillon Pilorget, The Oregonian

“EXTRAORDINARY BEAUTIFUL. WOW! ALL I CAN SAY IS WOW!” - Helen Raptis, KATU2

MORE SHOWS ADDED! NOW PLAYING UNTIL AUGUST 14

UNDER THE WHITE BIG TOP • At Zidell Yards in South Waterfront, Portland • cavalia.net • 1.866.999.8111 34

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

MUSIC

DATES HERE

ZELDA GALEWSKY

FEATURE

An artist’s rendering of “He Is Without His Guns.”

Marisa Anderson

FRIDAY, JULY 29

THE GUITARIST’S NEW ALBUM IS THE SOUNDTRACK FOR A SCI-FI WESTERN THAT EXISTS ONLY IN HER MIND.

JODI DARBY

Much of Portland guitarist Marisa Anderson’s work is rooted in the Appalachian music tradition. With her new album, Into the Light, however, she turns her focus to Arizona’s Sonoran Desert. Influenced by guitar-based scores for desert-fried films like Ry Cooder’s Paris, Texas and Bruce Langhorne’s The Hired Hand—plus, of course, the indelible Ennio Morricone—she’s written the soundtrack for an imaginary sci-fi Western with contemporary political resonance. “The seed came from contemplation of the word ‘alien,’” Anderson says. “It can either mean someone from outer space, or just someone not from the U.S. I thought that was a pretty weird and messed-up tic in our language—you’re either from the U.S., or you’re from outer space. So I built a character who drops into the desert, an unnamed spot and an unknown time, and it’s like, where is he? In Mexico? In the U.S.? In a future that doesn’t include either of those things? Why does it matter? Who would he encounter, and with no sense of context or history, what would those encounters look like?” Of course, being that the movie doesn’t actually exist— and the album is instrumental—those images live entirely in Anderson’s head. So we asked her to describe what’s playing behind her eyelids as she plays each track. Read the complete version at wweek.com. JEFF ROSENBERG. “Into the Light”: The first one is like the title sequence. When I see that one, it’s like, the spaceship falls to earth, and we get the title and some figure walks out. It’s the setup. “In Waves”: The initial inspiration for that one was really staring at the sun while laying on a surfboard, and you’re just getting blasted and moving. It’s a really woozy song. So, it’s less deserty. But when I picture that one, it’s like laying on a body of water, surrounded by sand, staring at the sun. “Waltz of Shadows”: That’s like the classic Western saloon, maybe a little bit ominous. There is a

trope, right, where to set up a Western. There has to be a saloon scene, and there’s the piano player and the lady with the big dress. And there’s some dancing. That’s that scene. “The Old Guard”: The title’s a little bit of a play on words. There is a bit of a guitarist jab in there, because it’s kind of a wanky blues. I was thinking of “the old guard” as some sort of Clapton-esque dude shredder in a bar band. That one doesn’t have a really worked-out visual but—and maybe this is implied in the name—that would be the moment where our hero meets an adversary. “He Is Without His Guns”: That one has a very specific image from my own life. It’s about when I was 19, and I was hitchhiking with some friends up to Northern Arizona. And we were dropped off in the middle of the night in the middle of nowhere— not a building in sight, nothing. Our ride was just, like, “Get out.” We walked a little ways off the road, laid down in the dirt and went to sleep. And I woke up in the morning, the sun was rising, and on the horizon there were three guys on horseback, coming straight toward us. So that’s the specific memory transposed onto whoever this protagonist is—that feeling of complete helplessness, and just giving in to whatever’s gonna happen. Anderson

“Chimes”: It’s also kind of like an early-morning, “where am I” song. There’s a certain kind of wind that happens in the desert, when the sun comes up. It’s cold at night and hot in the day, but when the sun starts to come up, there’s this little wind that will happen often, because the temperature difference is starting. I was really consciously trying to make that sound and feeling. “End of the Night”: It’s set in a bar again and it’s the very end of the night, everyone kind of drunk. If there were three bands [on the bill], they’re all onstage, playing one song really loosely—sort of like a big jam on a three-chord song with everyone just being really sloppy and loose, and that’s the credits. And that’s that.

RAMBUSH

WEDNESDAY, JULY 27TH AT 6PM Ride with Rambush and you’re as likely to headbang to the heavy riffage of Slayer on their car stereo as you are to sing along to the warm storytelling of Marty Robbins. On their EP The Leech, released in May on Sound Judgment, the group strikes the perfect balance between ugly and pretty. Over the course of five songs, the group thrashes and harmonizes in equal parts. Songwriter’s Circle

W/ TONY TO EAGLEHEART GARCIA, GARC THEE SECRET SE SEA & JACK MCMAHON MAHO Monday, August 1st at 7PM

TONY EAGLEHEART E GARCIAA is a multi-genre singer songwriter storyteller who sings and speaks from a Spiritual Peace Warrior, Activist, Native American/Indigenous ndigenous People point of view. THE T SECRET SEAA is a cult-status indie icon from Tel Aviv, recently relocated to Portland. Jack McMahon has been a performing singer-songwriter for all of his adult life, giving the music priority over antics and image.

KACY & CLAYTON SATURDAY, AUGUST 6TH AT 3PM

The music of Kacy and Clayton exists outside of time, and burgeons with beautiful contradictions. It’s psychedelic and traditional, contemporary and vintage, melancholic and joyous. All at once, it showcases a slightly psych-folk sound of Linda Perhacs, Fleet Foxes, and First Aid Kit; rare country blues records and English folk tunes; and 1920s disaster songs and murder ballads.

DROWSE

SATURDAY, AUGUST 6TH AT 5PM

Drowse plays with themes of detachment and memory and their relationship to the “self” from the perspective of someone who has suffered dissociative experiences. Heavily influenced by writers like Roland Barthes and Sarah Manguso, drowse works with ideas of “the self as text”, “making the personal public” and allowing space for a paradox to create new meaning.

SEE IT: Marisa Anderson plays the roof deck at Revolution Hall, 1300 SE Stark St., No. 110, with Mouth Painter, on Friday, July 29. 7 pm. $10 advance, $12 day of show. 21+. Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

NIGHT SHOWS Presented by Jack Daniels

THURSDAY, AUGUST 25TH, 2016

DIGABLE PLANETS CAMP LO

Crystal Ballroom 21+ 7pm doors/8pm show • $25 FRIDAY, AUGUST 26TH, 2016

Y LA BAMBA ORQUESTRA PACIFICO TROPICAL HALEY HEYNDERICKX

Revolution Hall 21+ 7pm doors/8pm show • $15 FRIDAY, AUGUST 26TH, 2016

REAL ESTATE AND GUESTS

Crystal Ballroom 21+ 7pm doors/8pm show • $18 FRIDAY, AUGUST 26TH, 2016

PINKISH BLACK NOCTURNAL HABITS MOTRIK • DEMON FAMILIAR

Ash St. Saloon 21+ 8pm doors/9pm show • $10 SATURDAY, AUGUST 27TH, 2016

DAVID BAZAN MICHAEL NAU

Mississippi Studios 21+ 9pm doors/10pm show • $20 SATURDAY, AUGUST 27TH, 2016

BELL WITCH • MUSCLE AND MARROW ZIRAKZIGIL • JOHN HAUGHM Ash St. Saloon 21+ 9pm doors/10pm show $10 at the door 36

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

THURSDAY, AUGUST 25TH, 2016

Todd Barry

comedy

with Bryan Cook and Joann Schinderle Dante’s • $15

FRIDAY, AUGUST 26TH, 2016

BUSDRIVER DEANTONI PARKS

Mississippi Studios 21+ 8pm doors/9pm show • $12 FRIDAY, AUGUST 26TH, 2016

Candace • Talkative Adventure Club • Pony Village Kelly’s Olympian 9pm show/8pm doors • $5 SATURDAY, AUGUST 27TH, 2016

GUIDED BY VOICES

SUMMER CANNIBALS

Crystal Ballroom 21+ 9pm doors/10pm show• $25 SATURDAY, AUGUST 27TH, 2016

And And And Souvenir Driver Rilla • Grand Lake Islands Kelly’s Olympian 9pm show/8pm doors • $5 SUNDAY, AUGUST 28TH, 2016

PETER BJORN AND JOHN AND GUESTS

Revolution Hall 21+ 8pm doors/9pm show • $20

MUSIC CALENDAR WED. JULy 27 Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave Riders In The Sky: King of the Cowboys! Riders In the Sky Salute Roy Rogers

Alberta Rose

3000 NE Alberta St Chamber Music Northwest Summer Festival: Hsu and Yu in Recital

Corkscrew

1665 SE Bybee Blvd Eric Kallio - Glass, Wood and Steel

Dante’s

350 West Burnside Thee Commons

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. John Brown’s Body

High Water Mark Lounge

6800 NE MLK Ave Phantom Family, Slow Code, Medicine Bows, Brave Hands

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. The Hugs, Space Shark, Ellis Pink

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. The Christopher Brown Quartet, Mel Brown Quartet

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Duke Evers

LaurelThirst Public House

2958 NE Glisan St West Virginia Flood Relief Benefit Concert; Quick & Easy Boys

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave Tallulah’s Daddy

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. The Tillers / McDougall

Panic Room

3100 NE Sandy Blvd Sabbath Assembly, Atriarch, Hungers

Revolution Hall

1300 SE Stark St #110 Matt Bellassai

Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave. John Paul White, the Secret Sisters

The Analog Cafe

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Vista Kicks / The Gloomies / Decorations; Bird Law / Votive / The Beholder Band / Paper Gates; Kingston 10,

Corkscrew

1665 SE Bybee Blvd Ben Graves Trio

Ozomatli 1036 NE Alberta St Tara Velarde Album Release with The Colin Trio, Olivia Awbrey

Dig A Pony

Dante’s

736 SE Grand Ave. DAP 5 Year Anniversary with The Ghost Ease, Cat Hoch, Lithics, Strange Babes DJs

Edgefield

2126 SW Halsey St Troutdale OR 97060 “Weird Al” Yankovic

High Water Mark Lounge

6800 NE MLK Ave Gallows Bound / Whiskey Dick / Rum Rebellion / The Sawyer Family

Hollywood Theatre

4122 NE Sandy Blvd The Space Lady Plays to “Science is Fiction”

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. Mel Brown B3 Organ Group; Chance Hayden

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Mermaid in China, The Dancing Plague of 1518

LaurelThirst Public House

2958 NE Glisan St Kory Quinn / Al Scorch

LaurelThirst Public House

2958 NE Glisan St Lewi Longmire & the Left Coast Roasters w/ Edward Connell

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave Mo Phillips: for kids

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Moving Units presents the Songs of Joy Division, Viktor Fiction, Gold Casio

Ponderosa Lounge

10350 N Vancouver Way, Cort Carpenter & Britnee Kellogg

Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave. BJ The Chicago Kid

The Analog Cafe

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Aqueduct (Seattle), Hillary Susz (Boulder) and Stevhen Peters (PDX)

The Goodfoot

2845 SE Stark St Skerik’s Bandalabra

The Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave Dead Animal Assembly Plant

Doug Fir Lounge 830 E Burnside St. Aubrie Sellers

Duff’s Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave Wanna Be 52’s; Rick Emery

Edgefield

2126 SW Halsey St Troutdale OR 97060 Nelly’s Echo (winery)

Euphoria

315 SE 3rd Ave. Green Velvet

Hawthorne Theater

1507 SE Cesar Chavez Blvd. Warren G

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. Andy Stokes

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. High Five Danger, Stoner Control

LaurelThirst Public House

2958 NE Glisan St Cascade Crescendo; The Pine Hearts / Matt Takiff

Lincoln Performance Hall 1620 SW Park Ave. An Unlikely Muse: Brahms and Mühlfeld

Lincoln Recital Hall at Portland State University 1620 SW Park Ave. Chamber Music Northwest: Bryan Johanson

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave Carrie Clark; Two Planets, DBST

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Blesst Chest, Hot Victory, Plankton Wat

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. “WISH WE WERE THERE” ALBUM RELEASE EXTRAVAGANZA

Panic Room

3100 NE Sandy Blvd No Pants Presents: Drawback Captain Wails and The Harpoons The Shoestringers Swim Atlantic Mr Plow!

Revolution Hall

The Old Church

1300 SE Stark St #110 Marisa Anderson (roof deck)

The Know

The Secret Society

Star Theater

2026 NE Alberta St Thirsty City: Durazzo, Anechoic, Bones, Matryoshka, Yunzumz

The Liquor Store

3341 SE Belmont St, Old Age; Anne Denis & Nicholas Fontana, pianists

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St Jim Lauderdale

THURS. JULy 28 Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave Savoy Brown featuring Kim Simmonds

Alberta Rose

3000 NE Alberta St Albert Lee, Kate Taylor

1422 SW 11th Ave Cascadia Composers 116 NE Russell St Thursday Swing! Featuring Doug & Dee’s Hot Lovin’ Jazz Babies, Stumptown Swing

Twilight Cafe and Bar 1420 SE Powell Ghost Memosa / Andrews Ave. / Elmers Elevated

Valentines

232 SW Ankeny St Bevelers, Todd Gleason, Mick Arrell

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St Mic Check

FRI. JULy 29 Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave

LAST WEEK LIVE

350 West Burnside Water Tower with Holy Smokes

The Goodfoot

2845 SE Stark St The Kitchen Dwellers

[JULY 27-AUG. 2]

Alberta Street Pub

Dante’s

350 West Burnside GAEA

For more listings, check out wweek.com.

cLIffoRD kIng

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

Editor: Matthew Singer. to HAVE YoUR EVEnt LIStED, send show information at least two weeks in advance on the web at wweek.com/ submitevents. Press kits, cDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 nW Quimby St., Portland, oR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: music@wweek.com.

13 NW 6th Ave. Portland Psych Fest

The Analog Cafe

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Zax Vandal; School of Rock Concert; Altadore, PEMA, Humans; Dirty Water

The Firkin Tavern

1937 SE 11th Ave Wild War, Dain Norman Band

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St Butanna, Scourge of Ians, Worws, The Brand New Evictions

The Secret Society 116 NE Russell St Melao De Cuba Salsa Orchestra

Maze Koroma (right) with Blossom at PDX Pop Now.

POP-UP: Every summer, PDX Pop Now acts as a de facto referendum on the state of Portland’s music scene and, by proxy, the city as a whole. What this year’s installment—held outside AudioCinema under the Hawthorne Bridge on July 22-24—seemed to indicate was that, while Portland itself grows increasingly more exclusive, the music culture might be more inclusive than ever. But don’t just take my word for it. Here’s Cary Clarke, who helped found the all-ages, all-local, all-free festival over a decade ago, on Twitter: “Nostalgia check: @pdxpopnow is many times over more diverse on stage and off than it was in 2004.” That was true of who was performing, and what was being performed. There was Old Grape God’s kaleidoscopic art rap, Disemballerina’s doomy chamber metal, Lithic’s groovy No Wave and Andrew Endres Collective’s astute jazz. Veterans like Loch Lomond and Dragging an Ox Through Water shared space with teenage metalheads Saola. Maze Koroma’s future-forward hip-hop followed Consumer’s electronic spazz-outs. There was beauty in the noise of Tender Age’s drifting shoegaze, and also confrontation, whether in the form of Mic Capes leading a chant of “fuck the police,” Sleeping Beauties hurling potatoes at the audience or A Volcano shunning the stage to play on the street. At a time of great civic angst, it was a reminder that, if you keep your ears open wide enough, there are still plenty of reasons to feel good about living here. MATTHEW SINGER. The Secret Society 116 NE Russell St The Pepper Grinders feat. Ralph Carney

SAT. JULy 30 Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave Asleep at the Wheel

Alberta Rose

3000 NE Alberta St Rock ‘n’ Roll Camp for Girls Presents Summer Camp Session 3 Showcase

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave.

Rigsketball Musicfest: Magic Sword, Aan, Mic Capes, Chugger, the Lower 48, Ah God, Fog Father, Laura Palmer’s Death Parade, Ali Muhareb’s Mujahedeen

Doug Fir Lounge 830 E Burnside St. Satan’s Pilgrims

Duff’s Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave Midnight Serenadors

Edgefield

2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Weezer + Panic! at the Disco + Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness

Euphoria

315 SE 3rd Ave.

DJ Z-Trip

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. The Yachtsmen/Michelle DeCourcy & The Rocktarts

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Showdeer Presents The Critical Shakes, Shookup

Panic Room

3100 NE Sandy Blvd Baphomets Blood, Violentor, Cemetery Lust, Raptor +TBA

The Analog Cafe

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. PETER KASEN & FRIENDS

The Firkin Tavern

LaurelThirst Public House

1937 SE 11th Ave The Stupid Tears (Daniel Johnston tribute), Little Fury Things (Dinosaur Jr. tribute), Bandha Feahr

Mississippi Pizza

The Goodfoot

2958 NE Glisan St Billy Kennedy (all ages); The Mutineers; Water Tower 3552 N Mississippi Ave Kinked (Kinks Tribute Band)

2845 SE Stark St Garcia Birthday Band

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St

100 Watt Horse (Oly) // Sunbathe // Husky Boys

The Liquor Store

3341 SE Belmont St, Modern Ritual feat. Francis of Frank and Tony

The Secret Society

116 NE Russell St The Pearls; Patina, Joy Tribe

Valentines

232 SW Ankeny St PRINCESS DIMEBAG

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St White Eagle Youth Concert featuring Berahmand

cont. on page 38

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

MUSIC SUN. JULy 31

The Secret Society

116 NE Russell St Wrinkles, Small Million

Corkscrew

1665 SE Bybee Blvd Hawkeye Pierce Cosmic Outlaw Soul

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Pickin On The Doug Fir Patio

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. Hustle and Drone, Astro Tan, Earth World

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. iMurder Bait, Lore City, Common Sterling

LaurelThirst Public House

2958 NE Glisan St Freak Mountain Ramblers; Joy Mills Band / Earl Tom Parker

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave Maggie Gibson

Moda Center

1 N Center Court St Modest Mouse, Brand New

Revolution Hall

1300 SE Stark St #110 Madeleine Peyroux

Rontoms

600 E Burnside St Rontoms Sunday Sessions: The Lower 48 // Monarques

Star Theater

350 West Burnside KARAOKE FROM HELL

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Black Milk and Nat Turner, Blossom, Maze Koroma

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. The Sextet; Dan Balmer Trio

LaurelThirst Public House

2958 NE Glisan St Portland Country Underground; Kung Pao Chickens

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave Mr. Ben

The Goodfoot

221 NW 10th Ave. Re-Birthing The Cool, Bebop N Beyond; Mel Brown Septet

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Johanna Warren, Bright Smoke, Airport, Peridot

LaurelThirst Public House

WED. JULy 27 Beech Street Parlor 412 NE Beech Street Freeform Portland: DJ Sappho

2958 NE Glisan St Jackstraw; Taylor Kingman & the Tallboys

Church

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Red Bull Sound Select: METZ, the Ghost Ease, Tango Alpha Tango

Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave. Abstract Rude with The Chicharones, Bad Habitat, and B. Squid

1430 NE Sandy Blvd. DJ Hot Lips

The Embers Avenue 100 NW Broadway Knochen Tanz (oonz oonz)

2845 SE Stark St Boys II Gentlemen

Valentines

232 SW Ankeny St Hollow Sidewalks, Spindrift

TUES. AUG. 2 Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St King Shelter

Duff’s Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave Nicholas Hagen

The Lovecraft Bar

The Liquor Store

421 SE Grand Ave Psychopomp w/ Ogo Eion (ritual, dark ambient, drone, eclectic)

3341 SE Belmont St, Melt / Sand Babes (LA) / Hollow Sidewalks

The Old Church

1422 SW 11th Ave Portland Opera presents Resident Artist Ryan Thorn

1422 SW 11th Ave Church of House

DJ Kiffo

Wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St. AlunaGeorge, Kari Faux, Rejie Snow

Years DJing: I started DJing house parties in 2010 with my buddy Rymes while I was in college. I got my first real gig at a bar in 2012. Genre: Disco, house, techno. Where you can find me regularly: Main Squeeze at Holocene, every last Saturday of the month. Craziest gig: This gig wasn’t exactly crazy but it sure was a hell of a lot of fun. Main Squeeze and Infinite Vision threw a day party this summer, and it just so happened to be on my birthday. Long story short, birthday gigs are the best. My go-to records: I love all things disco, so it would have to be anything by Dr. Packer, Late Nite Tuff Guy, J Paul Getto or Purple Disco Machine. Don’t ever ask me to play: Dubstep. NEXT GIG: DJs Kiffo and Rymes spin at Main Squeeze’s two-year anniversary at Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison St., with Jamie Burton, Ben Tactic and Drexler, on Saturday, July 30. 9 pm. Free before 10 pm, $4 day of show. 21+.

Gold Casio at PDX Pop Now.

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

Church

Sandy Hut

The Goodfoot

2845 SE Stark St Sonic Forum

Black Book

Dig A Pony

511 NW Couch St. TRONix (electronica)

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Every Tuesday “ULTRA MAGNETIC”

412 NE Beech Street DJ L-Train 20 NW 3rd Ave The Cave (rap) w/ Massacooramaan

Ground Kontrol

The Analog Cafe

FRI. JULy 29 Beech Street Parlor

2600 NE Sandy Blvd. Chuka 736 SE Grand Ave. Boom! (pop oldies, garage, r&b)

MEgan nanna

13 NW 6th Ave. God Module with Dismantled and Voicecoil

MON. AUG. 1 Dante’s

NEEDLE EXCHANGE

Jimmy Mak’s

couRTESy oF DJ KiFFo

cont. from page 37

THURS. JULy 28 Beech Street Parlor 412 NE Beech Street DJ Hell Books

Church

2600 NE Sandy Blvd. Emerson Lyon (weak nite)

Gold Dust Meridian

3267 SE Hawthorne Blvd. DJ Mod Fodder

Moloko

3967 N. Mississippi Ave. Benjamin

Panic Room

3100 NE Sandy Blvd Tetsuo: Aphrodite (UK)

Quarterworld

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd ElecTron: An Arcade Dance Night

2600 NE Sandy Blvd. Fritzwa

Crush Bar

1400 SE Morrison Lite-Brite Dance Party 2

Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St 80s Video Dance Attack

Dig A Pony

736 SE Grand Ave. Doc Adam (golden era hip-hop)

Euphoria Nightclub 315 SE 3rd Ave Green Velvet

Gold Dust Meridian

3267 SE Hawthorne Blvd. DJ Major Sean

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. Snap! ‘90s Dance Party

Killingsworth Dynasty 832 N Killingsworth St Electric Dreams w/ DJ Drew Groove & DJ Savage (italo disco, boogie funk, hi-NRG)

Saucebox

214 N Broadway St Lemove

Spare Room

4830 NE 42nd Ave The Get Down w/ DJ Maxx Bass & DJ Supreme La Rock

The Embers Avenue 100 NW Broadway Friday Night 80’s & Top 40

The Goodfoot

2845 SE Stark St Soul Stew w/ DJ Aquaman (funk, soul, disco)

Star Bar

The Liquor Store

The Embers Avenue

The Lovecraft Bar

639 SE Morrison St. DJ Big Ben 100 NW Broadway Thursday Electronic

The Liquor Store

3341 SE Belmont St, Wake The Town w/ Great Dane

The Lovecraft Bar 421 SE Grand Ave Shadowplay w/ DJ Carrion (goth, industrial, EBM)

3341 SE Belmont St, Grilled Cheese Disco 421 SE Grand Ave The Opera w/ DJs Buckmaster and Perfect Health

Valentines

232 SW Ankeny St Surface Noise Vinyl Happy Hour (bring your own vinyl)

Beech Street Parlor 412 NE Beech Street Shrimp Tempura

Church

2600 NE Sandy Blvd. Chuka

Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St 80s Video Dance Attack: New Wave Edition

Dig A Pony

736 SE Grand Ave. J Prez (party rockers)

Double Barrel Tavern 2002 SE Division St. DJ Daddy Issues

East Burn

1800 E Burnside St. Soulsa! w/ DJ Blas (latin fusion)

Euphoria Nightclub 315 SE 3rd Ave Z-Trip

Gold Dust Meridian

3267 SE Hawthorne Blvd. DJ Random Noise

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. Main Squeeze Dance Party: Two Year Anniversary

Sandy Hut

1430 NE Sandy Blvd. DJ Just Dave

Saucebox

214 N Broadway St Joe Frank

The Analog Cafe

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. ANDAZ 14th Anniversary w/ DJ Anjali and The Incredible Kid

736 SE Grand Ave. Dear Mama Presents “Do Right Sunday” A Benefit for The Q Center (throwback rap, electro, r&b)

The Embers Avenue

100 NW Broadway Latino Night w/ DJ Leo (latin, cubono, salsa)

The Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave Blue Sunday w/ DJ Daniel Slay Lewis (new wave, synthpop, post-punk)

White Owl Social Club 1305 SE 8th Ave East Sunday Funday (house music)

MON. AUG. 1 Club 21

2035 NE Glisan St. DJ Major Sean

Ground Kontrol

511 NW Couch St. Reagan-o-mix (new wave, hip-hop, soundtrack)

The Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave Black Mass (goth dance)

TUES. AUG. 2 Black Book

20 NW 3rd Ave Pop Out w/ Dubblife (dance party)

Club 21

2035 NE Glisan St. DJ Smooth Hopperator

The Embers Avenue

100 NW Broadway Saturday Top 40 Remixed

100 NW Broadway Recycle w/ DJ Tibin (dark dance)

The Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave Ogo Eion

421 SE Grand Ave Coma Toast

Tube

SUN. JULY 31 Beech Street Parlor 412 NE Beech Street DDDJJJ666 & Magnolia Bouvier

BAR REVIEW

Dig A Pony

18 NW 3rd Ave. Tubesdays w/ DJ Jack

E M I LY J O A N G R E E N E

SAT. JULY 30

Where to drink this week. 1. Century 930 SE Sandy Blvd., centurybarpdx.com. With American sports in July garbage time, Century has started highlighting its roof and showing movies on its gigantic pull-down screen and DJ-ready sound system. We vote for lots and lots of explosions.

2. Likewise 3564 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-206-4884. For Hawthorne art bar Likewise, Rum Club manager Mike Treﬀehn designed an herbal cocktail of fernet, applejack and two other liquors that is delightfully boozy and can only be ordered by a minimum of two people. If you don’t have a friend, you are obliged to make a new one.

3. Clyde’s Prime Rib

5474 NE Sandy Blvd., 503-281-9200, clydesprimerib.com. There are new owners and upgraded food—but that classic soul song remains the same.

4. Gestalt Haus 3584 SE Division St. German bier, bikes and local brats are a pretty simple formula for a bar—and this is a pretty simple bar, which makes it a very welcome addition to its fancy Division Street neighborhood.

5. Division Wines 3564 SE Division St., 503-234-7281, divisionwines.com. One of the ﬁnest wine shops in town—especially if your tastes run toward the natural, oddball and aperitif—Division now has a highly pleasant wine bar where you can happily while away your happy hours.

GET MEDICATED: Say you’re a 28-year-old internal medicine resident at Oregon Health & Science University Hospital, $450,000 in debt, and you’ve just come off your third 20-hour overnight shift of the week. Where do you go to blow off steam? Welcome to Feathered Nesst Public House (3460 SW US Veterans Hospital Road, 503-719-7517, featherednesst.com), named in part after the owner’s last name, Ness. It is the first bar, as far as we know, ever to top isolated Marquam Hill. Nestled in a thicket behind the palatial ivory tower of OHSU Hospital, Feathered Nesst is a jack-of-all-trades hangout. Its 48 taps lean toward recognizable Oregon and California craft beer (pints start at $5.50, growlers are available to go), with a weird fetish for Victory Brewing of Pennsylvania and Proletariat wine out of Washington, plus a few scattered ciders and kombucha. The clientele is a pre-built mix of beleaguered hospital staff and families in need of a breath of fresh air, with nondescript modern decor that looks like the lobby of an upscale apartment complex. My companion described the menu of bar staples (fried stuff, burgers, ostensibly healthy salads and bowls) as “hospital food.” Our spicy fried-chicken sliders (three for $9) were of an acceptable quality and size for $3 apiece, while the garlic fries ($7) were a soggy, abrasive wreck that resulted in hours of dragon breath. But the place fulfils its duty. Besides a solo blonde in a low-cost, very tight dress who appeared to be angling to meet doctors, the Tuesday night crowd was mostly people who were very clearly in need of a drink: a large group of gawky yo-pros, tables of middle-aged hospital staff, and people absorbing a few precious minutes in sunlight on the patio. WALKER MACMURDO.

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

t e G e r Mo WW in r u yo ! x o b in

wweek.com

WW NeWsletter Devour local cut

want to advertise? email advertising@wweek.com for details. 40

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

http://bit.ly/wwnewsletter

G R E G PA R K I N S O N

PERFORMANCE = WW Pick. Highly recommended. Most prices listed are for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply, so it’s best to call ahead. Editor: ENID SPITZ. Theater: ENID SPITZ (espitz@wweek.com). Dance: ENID SPITZ (dance@wweek.com). TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit information at least two weeks in advance to: espitz@wweek.com.

THEATER OPENINGS & PREVIEWS Catch as Catch Can (JAW)

For the ﬁrst time since her mindwarping play You For Me For You rocked Portland Playhouse, Mia Chung’s unconventional family storytelling will be on a Portland stage. This time, she’s tackling middle-class suburbia instead of North Korea and Communism. Two tight-knit families are rocked with unexpected drama when one son moves back home. Typical story, but knowing this playwright, expect anything but suburban. Gerding Theater at the Armory, 128 NW 11th Ave., pcs.org. 4 pm Saturday, July 30. Free.

The Forcings (JAW)

As the public face of Exxon’s operations, Ernie Ledezma helped the company navigate a mysterious scandal involving the disappearance of a group of environmental activists. As he’s celebrating with friends and family on the eve of his retirement from the company, the arrival of a stranger triggers a deluge of secrets. Conspiracy, intrigue and a healthy dose of magical realism pervade Kevin Artigue’s play, produced over a twoweek period in collaboration with local actors and directors as part of the JAW, or Just Add Water. Gerding Theater at the Armory, 128 NW 11th Ave, 503-445-3700. 4 pm Sunday, July 31. Free.

JAW: Just Add Water Portland Center Stage’s largest annual extravaganza of new work is a long weekend of readings, sneak peeks at future productions, plays from promising high schoolers (8 pm Friday) and pop-up events in the Armory theater by Powell’s. In addition to the five new works chosen from 200 submissions nationwide showing on the main stage (see individual descriptions), the smaller Ellyn Bye theater will host yoga (10:45 am Saturday), a site-specific show from Shaking the Tree Theatre (7:10 pm and 7:40 pm Saturday) and a new dance by Portland’s Heidi Duckler Dance Theatre (3:40 pm Sunday) in the Mezzanine. This is a wannabe-theater-subscriber’s heaven—all the big names in one place for free—and an elitist-theater-subscriber’s hell—riff raff in the Armory. Portland Center Stage, 128 NW 11th Ave., pcs.org. 8 pm Friday-Sunday, July 29-31. Free.

Lauren Weedman Doesn’t Live Here Anymore (JAW)

Santa Monica’s Lauren Weedman (I Love the ’80s 3-D) is tired of telling us how to feel about Portland. She’s moved on to bigger things, like how to make your ass look smaller. Gerding Theater at the Armory, 128 NW 11th Ave., pcs.org. 8 pm Saturday, July 30. Free.

Mr. Marmalade

Four-year-old Lucy has one fuckedup imaginary friend. This is no children’s show. Instead, Mr. Marmalade is an abusive cocaine addict with a dildo obsession and a porn problem. Adding to the fuckpile, Lucy has one friend, a depressed boy named Larry who’s notorious for being the youngest kid to attempt suicide in the history of New Jersey. Twilight Theater might not be known for high-proﬁle works or star power, but you can’t argue its stomach for black comedy. No show

Thursday, July 28. Twilight Theater Company, 7515 N Brandon Ave., 8 pm Thursday-Saturday, 3 pm Sunday, through Aug. 6. $15.

The Naked Magic Show

The title pretty much sums it up: An R-rated magic show features two “hot and hilarious” Australian performers who prefer to work their magic in the buﬀ. Christopher Wayne, a Queensland radio-comedy writer and host of the children’s show More Than Magic, teams up with Mike Tyler, a comedy hypnotist and one of Australia’s most successful “clothed” magicians. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 503-2484335. 8 pm Wednesday, July 27. $22.25-$79.50.

The Saints (JAW)

After a childhood in the foster care system, the trajectory of a young woman’s life is changed by a chance encounter with a pair of young missionaries. Nathan Dame’s gritty comedy is produced by local playwrights, actors and directors who collaborated for JAW, or Just Add Water, a two-week project that brings staged readings of new scripts to the public over the course of one “Big Weekend.” Gerding Theater at the Armory, 128 NW 11th Ave., 503-445-3700. Noon Saturday, July 30. Free.

NEW REVIEWS The Italian Girl in Algiers

Love triangles—or love pentagons as seen here—are tailor-made for farce. Two people are going to find true love and one sad, sorry buffoon getting left out. It just happens here that the buffoon here happens to be an Algerian leader wearing a tan tracksuit with a pillow tied around his head. Oh, and another corner of the love pentagon spends most of the opera wearing a lampshade. The Italian Girl in Algiers isn’t Rossini’s best-known work, but it just might be the famed composer’s funniest. The Portland Opera’s production begins with wide-eyed tourist strolling about the giant Persian rug that serves as the set throughout. Mustafa is bored with his wife. So he does the only logical thing: he offers her as a wife to Italian slave Lindoro and demands that his assistant bring him an Italian woman. As luck would have it, a beautiful Italian woman named Isabella just washed up on the shore. What follows is an energetic, fitfully entertaining farce with more physical comedy than I’d ever expected to see in an opera. JOHN LOCANTHI. Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 503-248-4335. 7:30 pm July 27, 29 and Aug. 6; 2 pm Sunday, July 31. $35-$200.

ALSO PLAYING Coriolanus

With plebeians taking selﬁes, iPhone videos of Roman general Caius Martius ranting, and a drunk singing Beyonce’s “Daddy Lessons” as he stumbles through ancient Antium, Portland Actors Ensemble’s outdoor production of Coriolanus draws winking comparisons between Shakespeare’s military drama and present-day politics. The Ensemble’s pop-culture additions jerk audiences away from the 17th-century world of the play. Even without these nudges, though, it’s hard to ignore the resemblance to present day: a commander who can’t drum up support from the

CONT. on page 42

ISRAEL IN 4 BC HAD NO SNAPCHAT: Ernie Lijoi and Ithica Tell.

REVIEW

Jesus Christ Is Back

in a silk robe, dances the cancan with four girls in gold mini-dresses and grinds up on Jesus, the seats of the old church were bouncing from foot-tapping. The final disco ecstasy number, “Superstar,” gets a hilarious, modern take: A gaggle of girls Snapchat Jesus like he’s BY SOPHIA JU N E sjune@wweek.com Bieber, and Tell rocks a fire-engine red pantsuit like It has been 11 years since Jesus Christ Superstar was Beyoncé would, multitasking on an iPhone while she staged by a Portland company. This summer, the scolds Jesus. In the background, the cross is backlit once-controversial musical is not only onstage, it with neon lights and a star that looks straight from a is in an old church in Sellwood. Longtime Portland Rockstar energy drink can. actor-director Michael Streeter, who describes himIf star-power moments like these sound too big self as a “recovering Catholic,” wants Superstar to be for a small theater, it’s because they are. Superstar is controversial again. While this production at Post5 meant to be performed big. It is a full-fledged rock Theatre is not likely to spark hot-button buzz, it opera about the life of Jesus, after all. In Sellwood’s is goddamn entertaining. theater, it feels like a squeeze. Instead Since its controversial Broadway of gleaning symbolic irony from the debut in 1971, Superstar has become church-turned-theater setting, it one of history’s favorite musicals, mainly felt too hot. The first Friday “SOME DECISIONS loved by basically anyone who show was oversold, a good sign thought the New Testament was for local theater, but one that left MADE IN 400 A.D., boring, which is a lot of people. WE’RE STILL LIVING WITH the audience scrunched on tiny Streeter’s update tries to bring chairs on an already crowded THE CONSEQUENCES the edge back by casting women stage. The band squeezed to as Apostles and actress Ithica TODAY, AS FAR AS one side, under a staircase, and Tell as Judas. “Some decisions threw ponchos on over jeans and WOMEN’S POWER.” made in 400 A.D., we’re still living Vans to seem more relevant. In the —MICHAEL STREETER with the consequences today, as far disciples’ poppy dance numbers, the as women’s power,” says Streeter. “It crowded stage seemed like a possible also cuts off half my talent pool if I have to fire code violation. hire only men.” Talent sweeps every staging issue under The show’s biggest middle finger to the Bible the rug, though. When Tell is singing as Judas—one is a wedding scene in which Jesus (Broadway vet- of the most difficult roles in musical theater, with a eran Ernie Lijoi) and Mary Magdalene (Jessica vocal range spanning two octaves—you forget that it’s Tidd) exchange vows in a dialogue-free, low lit and 90 degrees and the actors are trying not to trip over understated ceremony. For a production filled with each other. She performs effortless vocal runs, like glitter and fake blood, the scene feels like a forced she’s jumping hurdle after hurdle in a pool of molasses footnote and is both too short and lackluster to buoy without even breaking a sweat. “Annas, you’re a friend, Streeter’s feminist take. If Andrew Lloyd Webber a worldly man and wise/Caiaphas, my friend, I know did a Jesus wedding scene, you could bet on searing you sympathize,” she sings both lightning-fast and electric guitar, not mellow acoustic plucking, as in crystal clear. Verses were chopped, lines were dropped, Streeter’s production. helping the show clock in at a comfortable two hours. This Superstar is best when Lloyd Webber’s addic- What’s uncomfortable is honoring the program’s tive music is given free rein. Even as lepers swarm, request that you refrain from singing along. Judas cries and Jesus explodes with anger, the audience cannot help but manically bob its collective head. SEE IT: Jesus Christ Superstar is at Post5 Theatre, 1666 SE Lambert St., 971-333-1758, post5theatre.org. When flamboyant King Herod (Brian Burger), dressed 8 pm Thursday-Sunday, through Aug. 20. $20.

SUPERSTAR IS ROCKING AN OLD SELLWOOD CHURCH.

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

PERFORMANCE common people, a rash populace that makes shortsighted choices in the wake of a famine. Even the tenuous peace between Rome and its former rival looks uncomfortably familiar. The tight, twohour production was beautifully acted, with particularly stellar performances by Ken Yoshikawa as Aufidious and Allison Anderson as Volumnia, but technical issues held it back. Strange acoustics in the Pettygrove Park courtyard, which is located in a noisy pocket of downtown, made much of the dialog inaudible. Any time an actor wasn’t facing the audience and half-yelling, it was impossible to hear. It is a testament to Anderson’s dynamism and Yoshikawa’s booming voice that the production never felt longer than it was. The Shakespearean play is an eerily topical pick for the Ensemble’s 12th annual “Twilight Tragedie” summer series. Pettygrove Park, SW 2nd and SW Harrison St., 7 pm Thursday-Sunday, July 28-31. Free.

Trickster of Seville

Weekend at Bernie’s

Not that Bernie. This might the the longest-running summer show in Portland, but the comedic buddy tale won’t last until election night. Instead, Portland’s top improv talents stage the bumbling tale of two guys trying to convince the world that their boss is not dead. Think Office Space with 1980s Hawaiian shirts, mob bosses and super hot babes, inside Portland’s best new comedy venue. After the show, enjoy the fragrant Old Town scene outside. The Siren Theater, 315 NW Davis St., 10 pm FridaySaturday, July 29-30. $16.

DANCE Cool Moves, Bro

“Boost your follower count 364 percent,” teases Portland contemporary crew 11:Dance Co. Normally, they pop through the aisles at Portland fashion shows or lead dance nights at Fortune downtown. Here, in Adidas track pants or dominatrix lingerie, they pop, writhe and lick pizza slices. In a black box theater, the sexy, young ensemble slithers and breaks, with occasional soloists highlighted by a stark spotlight. From top choreographers like NYC contemporary queen Emma Portner and Northwest Dance Project’s Ching Ching Wong, it looks dope, bro. CoHo Theater, 2257 NW Raleigh St., 11dance.co. 8 pm Friday-Saturday, 1:30 and 4 pm Sunday, through July 31. $25.

21+

TICKETS ON SALE AT

SUNDAY AUGUST 28

SATURDAY AUGUST 27

JAMES DANIEl

A “family-friendly” interpretation of the famous Spanish play features seven actors taking on the entire range of twenty-plus roles. This precursor to the Don Juan legend details the exploits of a ruthless womanizer who pushes one of his conquests to attempt suicide and essentially rapes another by tricking her into thinking she’s having sex with her fiance, so how exactly Masque Alfresco plans to transform it into a family-friendly comedy remains unclear. George Rogers Park Memorial Garden, 611 S Slate

Street, Lake Oswego, 503-254-5104. 7 pm FridaySunday, through Aug. 7. Free.

DURAN DURAN / NATHANIEL

ICE CUBE /

RATELIFF STRFKR / & THE NIGHT SWEATS A$AP FERG / ANDREW W.K. / LIZZO THE COATHANGERS / KYLE CRAFT

TAME IMPALA WEEN //DRIVE LIKE JEHU

UNKNOWN MORTAL ORCHESTRA PARQUET COURTS / SHEER MAG HOP ALONG

/ DIARRHEA PLANET / TENEMENT

WATERFRONT PARK • PORTLAND, OR

PORTLAND.PROJECTPABST.COM

THE ITALIAN GIRL IN ALGIERS 42

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

C O u R T E SY O F FAC E B O O K

THANK YOU, PORTLAND North Portland Veterinary Hospital

503-285-0462 3000 N Lombard Street, Portland OR 97217 vcahospitals.com/north-portland

COOL MOVES, BRO

COMEDY & VARIETY Al’s Den Comedy Night

Mostly local stand-up comedians and Seattleites passing through do an hour long showcase. Sometimes the best part is watching Crystal Hotel guests awkwardly sidle by the stage, wearing only a swimsuit and towel, on their way to the pool behind this basement bar. Al’s Den, 303 SW 12th Ave. 10:30 pm Fridays and Saturdays. Free. 21+.

The Brody Open Mic

Twice-weekly, Portland’s most prolific improv venue opens its stage to everyone for 3-minute bits. Sign up online day of before 1 pm. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 224-2227. 8:30 pm Tuesday-Wednesday. Free.

Comic Strip

Portland’s best stripper comedian, Wendy Weiss, challenges the stereotype that women can’t be funny and hot. This recurring show mixes her passions, making comics take off their clothes while they try to make people laugh. She rings a bell eery few minutes, signaling it’s time for the comic to take off an article of clothing. They usually only get as far as their skivvies. Funhouse Lounge, 2432 SE 11th Ave., 503-309-3723. 10 pm last Fridays. $8. 21+.

Curious Comedy Open Mic

Sign up start at 7:15, and every comic gets a tight three minutes onstage in this weekly show hosted by Andie Main. Curious Comedy Theater, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 8 pm Sundays. Free.

Earthquake Hurricane

Some of WW’s favorite funny Portlanders showcase famous and not-so-famous, local and not-solocal comedians. Hosted by Curtis Cook, Alex Falcone, Anthony Lopez and Bri Pruett inside a pretty epic bike shop. Velo Cult Bike Shop, 1969 NE 42nd Ave., 922-2012. 9 pm Wednesdays. Free, $5 suggested donation. 21+.

Extra Cheese

Brodie Kelly’s monthly pizza party/comedy showcase gives locals a tight 5 for standup, and coincides with happy hour: $2.50 pints. Hotlips Pizza, 2211 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 234-9999. 8 pm Mondays. Free.

Kevin Nealon

From Mr. Cheezle in the stoner comedy Grandma’s Boy to Doug Wilson in the stoner TV show Weeds, Kevin Nealon has consistently been one thing: funny. A working standup before joining the cast of Saturday Night Live, where he hosted Weekend Update and created memorable characters like Mr. No Depth Perception, Nealon has a massive following and comes to town for five shows in three nights. Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave., 888-643-8669. 8 pm Thursday, 7:30 and 10 pm Friday-Saturday, July 28-30. $25-$30. 21+.

Laughs at Legrowlski

Local comic Seth Johnston is putting up a brand new monthly showcase, and it’s going to be at Portland’s Big Lebowski-themed bar. For the first installment of his show, Johnston will be welcoming Tony C., Alana Eisner, and headliner Adam Pasi who finished third in the most recent Portland’s Funniest Person contest. Enjoy a White Russian, have a laugh, and maybe afterward you can hit up the In-N-Out Burger. The Big Legrowlski, 812 NW Couch St., 503-206-6481, 9 pm Saturday, July 30. 21+.

Leafly Comedy Tour: Ron Funches

You love weed. You love Ron Funches. Ron Funches loves weed. It’s too bad Ron left town before it became legal in Portland. Luckily he’s back and doing a comedy show sponsored by the world’s number-one cannabis resource, according to their own website. A world-renowned giggling joke teller, Funches was recently added to the cast of Powerless, an upcoming comedy

TV series set in the DC Comics universe. Sounds like a show stoners might enjoy. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., 503284-8686. 8 pm Thursday, July 28. Free (subject to capacity). 21+.

Open Court

This weekly, long-form improv show combines performers from many Portland theaters and troupes. Newbies are welcome and teams are picked at random, then coached by an improv veteran before taking the stage. Curious Comedy Theater, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 4779477. 7:30 pm Thursdays. $5.

Sunday School

Workshop students, veteran crews and groups that pre-register online perform long form improv every Sunday. Curious Comedy Theater, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 6 pm Sundays. $5 suggested donation.

Supernova

Brody’s students showcase their improv, sketch and standup skills—a different class each week. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 224-2227. 7:30 pm Thursdays. $5.

NEVER MISS A BEAT.

Thursday Night Throwdown

Curious’ twice-monthly competition pits teams that apply in advance online against one another for a chance to compete in Friday Night Fights the next week. It’s first come, first served, and every groups gets 17 minutes. Curious Comedy Theater, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 9:30 pm every second and fourth Thursday. Free.

@WillametteWeek @wweek @WillametteWeek

For more Performance listings, visit Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

Is coMIng!

= WW Pick. Highly recommended. By JENNIFER RABIN. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit show information—including opening and closing dates, gallery address and phone number—at least two weeks in advance to: Visual Arts, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: espitz@wweek.com.

Voices

Featuring all things great in Portland. Finder focuses on neighborhoods, extensive business listings, people profiles and detailed maps. The guide also features the nightlife, arts, dining and shopping that define our city.

Megan nanna

Distributed at locations in the Portland Metro area. Including restaurants, shops & retailers.

In artist Cat Del Buono’s video installation, small monitors throughout the gallery play testimony from abuse survivors. The videos are cropped around each woman’s mouth, their identities protected. Only by leaning in close and listening can you single out individual stories. Step back and you will hear a clamor of sound, a collective testimony that serves as a reminder of the insidiousness of this problem, which does not discriminate by race, age, religion, or social status. Blue Sky Gallery, 122 NW 8th Ave., 503-2250210. Through July 31.

The Color of Memory

Gallery owner Jeﬀrey Thomas curated a group show spanning decades of 2-D work by well-known artists that highlights their exploration of color and memory. But, really, these elements of inquiry can be found in most artists’ practices. So the real through line of the exhibition is Thomas himself, who is approachable and warm and who will take you through the show and tell you wonderful things. He will explain to you that a formal still life is displayed next to a canvas of total chaos because the two share the exact same palette— one contained within realism, the other blown to bits by abstraction. He will tell you about the artist who, in his dementia, is reworking old paintings, changing the memories they hold, as his own evanesce. This is the type of gallery to go into, ask questions, and listen to stories. You will be better for it. Jeﬀrey Thomas Fine Art, 2219 NW Raleigh St., 503-544-3449. Through Aug 6.

moment that the ceramic pieces crash to the ground after being dropped from a height. This creates jaw-dropping action from an object that was completely static a mere fraction of a second earlier. In one photograph, two men are frozen in Matrix-like suspended animation, but instead of a ﬂock of birds hovering around them, they are engulfed in a cyclone of their own shattered body parts. Violence and destruction abound, but so do other things, like the process of aging captured by the breaking apart of a white-bearded ﬁgure. Blue Sky Gallery, 122 NW 8th Ave., 503-225-0210. Through July 31.

Island

A mountain of oversized ceramic heads—abstract, animal, human—rises from the floor of the Laura Russo Gallery. When sculptor J.D. Perkin started working on the installation, he concentrated on the individual faces that now make up the whole, wanting simply to have fun creating each one. As more of them came into being— people of different races, ages, stations in society—a narrative began to take shape. Some of the details—gas masks, nursing hats bearing the symbol of first aid—point to a post-apocalyptic tableau, while others, like the feeling of inclusivity, leave us with an idea of a utopia in which everyone is together and represented. Since Perkin is not a conceptual artist and doesn’t have strong designs on what the work needs to convey, we all get to decide for ourselves. Laura Russo Gallery, 805 NW 21st Ave., 503-226-2754. Through July 30.

A Stand of Pine in the Tilled Field

Publishes: AuGusT 17, 2016 Space Reservation & Materials Deadline: JULY 28

503.243.2122 • advertising@wweek.com

R E S E R V E YO U R S PA C E TO D AY ! DistributeD at Powell’s year rounD, PortlanD’s #1 tourist attraction! 44

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

PDX Contemporary, one of Portland’s most revered blue-chip galleries, is celebrating its 21st anniversary with a group show featuring work by over 30 of its artists. The title of the exhibition, A Stand of Pine in the Tilled Field, draws a poetic parallel between an artist and a tree that thrives after a ﬁre. But it is also a metaphor for the gallery itself, able to grow through the cultural and economic rain and drought over the last two decades. PDX Contemporary, 925 NW Flanders St., 503-227-5111. Through July 30.

North

Photographer Jenny Olsen’s latest series is a collection of color portraits of her home in North Portland where she lived after getting sober. “I found humility, honesty, and compassion for myself and others in this house,” says Olsen. “I became human in this house.” Olsen shows us how it is possible to capture images of a place as lovingly, faithfully, and with as much gratitude as one might photograph a person who has kept them safe, guided them, and loved them into being. It is a meditation on how certain places in our lives can shape the people we turn out to be. Wolﬀ Gallery, 618 NW Glisan St., Suite R1, 971-413-1340. Through July 30.

Porcelain Figurines

In his large-scale color photographs, Martin Klimas captures images of what would otherwise be precious porcelain ﬁgurines—the type your grandmother keeps in her curio cabinet—except that Klimas rigged his camera’s shutter to open at the exact

delight in the chorus of hundreds of artistic voices shouting, “Look what we made!” Disjecta, 8371 N Interstate Ave., 503-286-9449. Through Sept. 18.

Conversations With Strangers

The work of artists Caleb Hahne and Adrian Landon Brooks in this two-person show couldn’t be more different. Hahne’s figurative paintings, with soft dusty palettes, deal with absences: faces and hands are often missing. Other features are rendered only to the point that allows our eyes to fill in the rest. Brooks’ paintings on panel are defined, geometric, and concrete. There is a romanticism to his work, though, his perfect lines and angles offset by gold moons hanging over birdmen and nomads. In his astonishingly beautiful and bold compositions, he makes excellent use of the wood on which he paints, leaving some elements bare in order to highlight, in some pieces, its blond, perfect grain, and in others, its gnarled, degraded surface. Stephanie Chefas Projects, 305 SE 3rd Ave., Suite 202, 310-990-0702. Through Aug. 5.

Eat, Drink, and Be Merry

The ﬁrst thing you’ll notice when you enter the gallery is a plinth topped with rows of 3-D-printed vulture skulls. There are 97 of them: a reference to the percentage of vultures that died oﬀ in the Great Indian Vulture Crisis. “I see art-making as an excuse to learn other things,” says artist Maria Lux, whose research for her installation Eat, Drink, and Be Merry led her to the Field Museum in Chicago to look through drawers full of dead birds. The exhibition, which includes 2-D work, is a compelling distillation of the complicated relationship between animals and people and how it is disturbed when we tinker with the natural order. Lux employs symbolism everywhere, and it’s a thrill to discover that the crystals hanging from a chandelier are actually castings of fruit bats and that certain recurring patterns—on frames and tablecloths— are molecular structures of viruses that animals transmit to humans. Upfor Gallery, 929 NW Flanders St., 503-227-5111. Through Aug. 27. COURTESY OF JEN NY OLSEN

FINDER

VISUAL ARTS

A selection from North by Jenny Olsen.

Portland 2016 Biennial Salon

For Portland’s 2016 Biennial, some of Oregon’s most high-proﬁle contemporary artists are showing their work across the state, in venues as disparate as residential garages, hardware stores, and hotel lobbies. Think of it as an Oregon-wide Easter egg hunt, where all the eggs are art installations. The jewel in the Biennial crown is the salon at Disjecta, where every inch of wall space in the cavernous warehouse is covered with sculptures, paintings, drawings, and video projections by artists who were handpicked to represent our fair state. You won’t have a chance to have many intimate moments with the work, or to even ﬁnd out who made what (unless you want to fumble with the awkwardly folded maps and numbered diagrams), but perhaps that shouldn’t be the goal. If you stop trying to appreciate each work individually, you can

Migrations

A collection of artist Junko Iijima’s small sculptures, based on the forms of Japanese cast-iron teakettles, huddle together on a table in the back room of Jeffrey Thomas Fine Art. Iijima has extended their traditional nubby round surfaces to create subtle horns, ears and antennae, and in so doing, has created an army of benevolent alien-like creatures, each with its own personality. Iijima fabricated the series during a residency with Kohler (the company that produces bathroom fixtures) which gave her access to an iron and brass foundry. The pieces cast in iron have a matte finish so black that it calls to you from the abyss. Their brass counterparts shimmer like liquid gold solidified. The works succeeds in creating a cognitive dissonance by giving us objects that echo function but are purely aesthetic. Jeffrey Thomas Fine Art, 2219 NW Raleigh St., 503-544-3449. Through Aug. 6.

For more Visual Arts listings, visit

BOOKS = WW Pick. Highly recommended. By JAMES HELMSWORTH. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit lecture or reading information at least two weeks in advance to: WORDS, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: words@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

WEDNESDAY, JULY 27 Gina Ochsner

Latvian villager Inara summons her son—whose gigantic ears can hear the dead’s secrets and Earth’s vibrations— to her deathbed, to tell him about her own magical life. It’s a collection of vignettes of the mundane and mysterious: ghosts and magical eels, folktales and mushroom hunting, ﬁnancial woes and ethnic slurs. It’s The Hidden Letters of Velta B., the latest from Gina Ochsner, who won an Oregon Book Award for her short story collection, People I Wanted to Be. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 800-878-7323. 7:30 pm. Free.

THURSDAY, JULY 28 Brian Sweany

Brian Sweany’s book, Buy the Ticket, Take the Ride, is named for a Hunter S. Thompson quote. Based on his life growing up in southern and central Indiana, it has a plot that earns that title. It’s full of familial drama, Catholicism, sex and abuse of substances, including but not limited to booze, cough syrup and unspeciﬁed pills. Spoiler alert: he survived. Annie Bloom’s Books, 7834 SW Capitol Highway, 503-246-0053. 7 pm. Free.

Fastpitch

Lots of people play softball, sure, but there was a period in the mid-20th century when watching it was wildly popular, when technically amateur squads of women slugged it out to give their company town bragging rights. Journalist Erica Westly’s Fastpitch tracks the sport’s evolution from one where boxing gloves and pumpkins were used as balls, through its glory days to its current iteration. Powell’s Books on Hawthorne, 3723 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 800-878-7323. 7:30 pm. Free.

Trail Running Bend and Central Oregon For people who don’t think driving more than 150 miles to go run is weird. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 800-878-7323. 7:30 pm. Free.

FRIDAY, JULY 29 J.R. Thornton

A nationally ranked tennis player in the U.S., Chase moves to China at age 14 and begins training with a Chinese state-run team. Not only does he experience culture clash, but he ﬁnds a culture that is clashing with itself: a Communist state with a growing capitalist sector. It’s debut novel Beautiful Country from J.R. Thornton, who was an American teenage tennis star in China himself. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 800-878-7323. 7:30 pm. Free.

SUNDAY, JULY 31 Harry Potter and the Cursed Child Midnight Release Party

For those of you who have gotten bored of Pottermore and can’t swing a ticket to the Wizarding World, fear not: There’s a new Harry Potter book. Well, kind of: J.K. Rowling is putting out the script to the play Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, which debuts in London on July 30. Set 19 years after the last book wraps up, it ﬁnds Harry as a harried Ministry of Magic employee with three kids, one of whom, Albus, is struggling with his pop’s legacy. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 800-878-7323. 12:01 am. Free.

A Reading No. 30

Poet Robert Duncan Gray’s A Reading series takes place at Valentines the last Sunday of every month. This week’s will feature readings from Sidony O’Neal, Juleen Johnson and Tommy Pico and will be guest-hosted by Julian Smuggles. Valentines, 232 SW Ankeny St., 503-248-1600. 5 pm. Free.

MONDAY, AUG. 1 Jesse Donaldson

From Oregon State University MFA Jesse Donaldson is his debut The More They Disappear, a period piece of sorts: Deputy Harlan Dupee is charged with solving the sheriﬀ’s murder. Set in rural Kentucky immediately after the release of OxyContin, Harlan soon ﬁnds that the drug trade

has touched every part of his community. Powell’s Books on Hawthorne, 3723 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 800-878-7323. 7:30 pm. Free.

TUESDAY, AUG. 2 Face Value: The Hidden Ways Beauty Shapes Women’s Lives

Everybody knows that beautiful people have it easier, and that the quest to obtain it can quickly turn into a death march—especially for women. In Face Value, journalist Autumn Whiteﬁeld-Madrano explores the role of beauty in (mostly) women’s lives through a series of interviews. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 800-878-7323. 7:30 pm. Free.

For more Books listings, visit

REVIEW

Laurie Notaro,

HOUSEBROKEN Eugene author Laurie Notaro has made a cottage industry of everyday failure, nine books of comic essays documenting an exuberantly clumsy life that’s the cultural equivalent of a proud muffin top. She’s most known for 2002’s bestselling Idiot Girls’ Action-Adventure Club—written while she was in Phoenix—but since moving to Oregon she’s joined our ricketyfenced ranks of neighborhood chickens and vintage yard sales and weird inability to understand Italian food. (She has also contributed a piece to Willamette Week, about her equally ungainly experience joining a fan-fic writing group.) Her newest essay collection, Housebroken (Ballantine Books, 289 pages, $17), comprises 25 brief sprays of embarrassment delivered with self-conscious good cheer—her father unfriending her on Facebook because she posted one too many ironically gross anti-foodie pictures of empty plates, or the time she grew a massive “second head” on her back, a benign lipoma she compares to a jelly doughnut. “I got in there with both hands,” her doctor tells her after the surgery. “I had to call another doctor in, and we both had our hands in there, pulling as hard as we could!” A Notaro essay requires a certain amount of goodwill, suspension of disbelief. Did the doctor volunteer this grotesque enthusiasm, or did Notaro herself pull as hard as she could until she had extracted a usable dose of mortification—her own pound of flesh in exchange for the pound of flesh? Notaro plumbs seemingly innocuous situations for maximum discomfort that she steadfastly refuses to feel—whether an Italian cooking class in which the instructor refuses to pronounce words correctly, the loss of a neighbor (she theatrically worries the new ones will bring chickens, which bring mice that shit in her shoes), or her own husband’s inability to cook. In that essay, her cooking lesson to her husband is framed as penance for a failed smooch—a Kiss Kam at a ball game ruined by her own discomfort and the brims of their ballcaps colliding publicly. It’s a sitcom blooper allowed to develop into a familiar domestic second act, a wisecracking knife scene in the kitchen. The title essay, about her own hoarding instincts and inability to clean up, is the book’s spiritual centerpiece. “Know this,” she writes, “I never want to be Tidy. Tidy is most likely an alcoholic, but not an awesome one…the one that never laughs when she’s drunk—only cries.” The book is often self-consciously antic, broadly catch-as-catch-can with its humor. But in its own way it is also a quiet love letter to the equal untidiness of the Middle American experience—lived without shame, humanized by thrift. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. SEE IT: Laurie Notaro reads at Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 503-228-4651. 7:30 pm Monday, Aug. 1. Free.

tore S k e e W a m e t te l l i W e h T

TreaT

yourself

wiTh a DubDubDeal!

Hungaricana $10 value for $5 1331 n. Killingsworth Hungaricana is Portland’s only Hungarian restaurant on wheels. Selling authentic Hungarian food with an american twist.

wweek.com/dubdubdeals Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

SABRINA LANTOS

MOVIES = WW Pick. Highly recommended. Editor: ENID SPITZ. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, send screening information at least two weeks in advance to Screen, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: espitz@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

OPENING THIS WEEK

STILL SHOWING

Jason Bourne

Absolutely Fabulous

He swore he’d never murder somebody with a book or a pencil or whatever again. But then Jeremy Renner proved to be less likable turning household items into murder weapons. And now Matt Damon, director Paul Greengrass and— from the looks of the preview—a bunch of HGH are back in the shaky-ass world of Robert Ludlum’s Bourne series, ready to prove why even Bond wanted to be Bourne for the past decade. No dirt bike is safe. Screened after deadline; see wweek.com for AP Kryza’s review. PG-13. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Living Room Theaters, Lloyd, Tigard, Vancouver.

Men Go to Battle

C Two Kentucky country boys show the strains of lower-class life and the Civil War in Zachary Trietz’s low-budget period piece, which came out of left field at the Tribeca Film Fest. As winter approaches, brothers Henry (Tim Morton) and Francis (David Maloney) find themselves broke, with nothing but an overgrown field producing weeds and problems. Determined to sell the land for a profit, Francis lobbies the town’s snotty upper class and Henry joins the Union cavalry. Like their empty field, not much growth comes from this film. Slow Kentucky accents parallel the film’s pacing. The most interesting moment comes when the narrative veers to Henry writing letters home from battle and close camera work draws emotion from him reading his letters to Francis aloud to a friend in war-torn infantry gear. NR. AMY WOLFE. Clinton Street.

Nerve

B+ Would you kiss a stranger on

camera for $100? How about hang from a construction crane for internet fame? The new film Nerve asks what happens when you combine Periscope-like live video with a democratized game of truth or dare in which the consequences are life-threatening and the rewards are fame and fortune. When a bookish high school girl (Emma Roberts) gets swept up in the game with the help of a mysterious stud on a motorcycle (Dave Franco), it seems they’re in for a night of harmless fun. But when the dares posed by the internet mob turn dark, the pair must fight for their lives. With an EDM-tinged soundtrack, lots of desktop computer screen shares, and visuals that meet somewhere between Tron and Spring Breakers, this one was made for a younger generation. And yet, rarely do teen movies get the benefit of a stellar idea to build on. PG-13. ZACH MIDDLETON. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Fox Tower, Lloyd, Oak Grove, Tigard, Vancouver.

Speculation Nation

B Spain’s equivalent to the abandoned auto plants and disused steel mills of the American Rust Belt consists of mile after mile of new but never leased apartments and condos that were built just before the 2008 financial crisis. Speculation Nation tells the stories of the Spaniards who, having lost their jobs to a busted economy, started squatting in these apartments while demanding the government sanction the practice. With long tracking shots of Brutalist architecture and interviews with down-and-out occupants, the film eerily details the human toll of economic floundering. It lacks explanation, though—key interviews from experts on Spanish economics might explain how things got so bad and how they might get better, giving the film a purpose beyond bleak exposé. Knowing the source of a problem might allow us to imagine a better future. NR. ZACH MIDDLETON. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7 pm Tuesday, Aug. 2.

C For fans of the old BBC series, the further adventures of buffoonish publicist Edina Monsoon (Jennifer Saunders) and perma-soused fashion editrix Patsy Stone (Joanna Lumley) shouldn’t seem all that different from a favored punk band’s reunion tour. As Edina flounces around her normcore daughter Saffron (Julia Sawalha), dismissive “Mother” (June Whitfield) and assistant Bubble (Jane Horrocks), little seems changed at first. The interfamilial barbs still sting, and while Hollywood’s relaxed attitudes toward drugs and drinking might blunt the impact of Edina’s debauchery, the film’s fat-shaming, transgendermocking, racially insensitive gags still hit. But the film version lingers cruelly on slower stretches and magnifies the inabilities of Britcom director Mandie Fletcher to stage set pieces, and sketch queen Saunders to craft a proper screenplay. The fashion-backward wardrobes and attitudes are no help. Lacking any connection to the surrounding culture or satirical intent, we’re left with just a pair of rapacious, self-centered monsters seeking fun. Strangely, that’s almost enough. They’re still larger than life. It’s the tweets that grew small. PG-13. JAY HORTON. Bridgeport, Cinema 21, Clackamas.

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

D Batman and Superman are ﬁghting, and it’s hard to choose a side. The new Superman is boring and out of place in the 21st century. Batman, on the other hand, has been reinvented as a huge dickhead. Played by Ben Aﬄeck with a characteristic lack of gravitas, Batman walks around in a silly metal suit killing people. You know how Batman never kills people? He does now. With nobody to root for, BvS:DoJ is just an unconscionably long slugfest simultaneously attempting too much and accomplishing almost nothing. PG-13. ALEX FALCONE. Vancouver.

The BFG

B- Like all Roald Dahl books, it’s an ecstatic mix of the sentimental and cruel—the story of a young orphan named Sophie abducted by a lovable Big Friendly Giant who catches and releases dreams. It is also a cavalcade of bodily functions rendered funny and an encyclopedia of brutality at the hands of other, evil giants like Bonecruncher and Fleshlumpeater. PG. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Eastport, Tigard.

Buddymoon

B+ The star of Grimm, the villain in Pitch Perfect 2 and the director of the Al-Jazeera documentary Borderland used to be roommates, and back then, they swore they would make a movie together. Buddymoon makes good on that promise. It is a charming, bromance-in-nature comedy following David Giuntoli and German YouTube phenomenon Flula Borg as fictional versions of themselves. The trio filmed in Oregon, ad-libbing most of the dialogue in this unscripted film about a morose actor who gets dumped right before his wedding and agrees to go on his honeymoon hike with his eccentric foreign friend Flula instead of his would-be wife. NR. LAUREN TERRY. Living Room Theaters.

Captain America: Civil War

A- Captain America: Civil War, though,

is proof you can jam pretty much every superhero in your roster into one ﬁlm and still let individuals shine. In pitting team Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr.) against Team Cap (Chris Evans) over a

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

47TH TIME’S THE CHARM: Jesse Eisenberg and Kristen Stewart.

REVIEW

Schmoozing Woody CAFÉ SOCIETY IS HALF-BORING AND COMPLETELY ON-BRAND.

In the tradition of recent Allen actor proxies like Owen Wilson and Joaquin Phoenix, Eisenberg is an uncanny mimic of the director himself. He stammers and inflects upward on his incredulous questions (“Wha-what are you talkBY CHA N CE SOLEM-PFEIFER @chance_s_p ing about!?”), but he can’t make the neuroses sing. In a cast that also includes Carrell, Corey Stoll, Early on in Café Society, Bobby Dorfman observes Blake Lively and Parker Posey, only Stewart feels his uncle’s Hollywood soirée, full of poolside like she’s not auditioning to play the writer. Cast schmoozing and Champagne, and Dorfman as angelic, she’s defiantly normal. To say none of (Jesse Eisenberg) describes himself as “half- them has chemistry together is an understatebored, half-fascinated.” It’s such a glaring bit of ment. During the movie’s most marquee bits, like Woody Allen dialogue. And you’ll spend the next Carrell trying to profess love as he’s constantly hour wondering if it’ll come to describe the film interrupted by Hollywood suits, the characters that is every bit as crowded, tanned and star- don’t seem to be even speaking to each other. studded as the party. The period romcom is visually arrestIn Allen’s 47th feature, the doeing—that’s the “half-fascinating ” eyed Bobby arrives in 1930s Los aspect. Perpetually waning light Angeles looking more for an makes a color palette that’s all in “WHA-WHAT experience than a calling. New shades of brown: wool slacks, ARE YOU York is no life. His mother and vintage cars, mahogany, adobe father bicker. His sister is marbrick, cheap drapes and whisTALKING ried in the suburbs. His brother key. The camera is graceful in ABOUT!?” is a two-bit gangster, though its performer-oriented moveeveryone looks the other way. ments, but the New York and —JESSE EISENBERG AS In California, he knows no one California backdrops are used BOBBY DORFMAN but his uncle Phil (Steve Carrell), like expensive paintings. Wealth, an in-demand film agent, though he age, delusion, avoidance—the audisoon begins rubbing elite shoulders and ence can take its pick why the past 15 courting Phil’s assistant, Vonnie (Kristen Stewart). years of Allen’s work find him withdrawn further The annual Woody Allen production machine and further from reality. Most tellingly, the filmhas assembled 90 very recognizable minutes here, maker who pioneered New-York-is-a-character with self-aware industry commentary, platitudes romcoms 40 years ago now renders the city as about New York and L.A., Jewish parentage, infi- though he’s never been there. delity and a male ingénue looking for approval. As Café Society is a movie of references. Cut to a those spill onto the screen, Café Society unfolds nugget of Dorfman family history (in the style of more like a biography of the quintessential Allen visual footnotes Allen has used since the ’70s). protagonist than a comedy. It’s calm and reflective Breathlessly name-drop golden-age movie stars to the point of drowsiness, like a very old man like Ginger Rogers, William Powell and Joel (Allen is now 80) dreaming the trivial life of a McCrea. A little Central Park in the morning, a young one. Bobby’s ultimate revelation, after he’s dash of Grauman’s Chinese Theatre in the afterfallen in, out and back into love with Vonnie, is that noon. Perhaps it’s not an accident that the entire time has passed. He can’t rewind, and he’s going film is lit like a gloaming. Café Society itself is a to stare into the middle distance about it. That reference to a career that at long, and recently seriousness makes Café Society less dainty than agonizing, last is nearly over. Allen’s 21st-century Parisian or Mediterranean C- SEE IT: Café Society is rated R. It opens Friday tourism movies, but there’s no body in this shell. at Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Fox Tower.

suspiciously fascist registration law for “enhanced humans,” directors Joe and Anthony Russo could have just put the heroes in a big-ass sandbox and let them duke it out. They do that, and it’s spectacular. But there’s nothing redundant in the action here, from a Bourne-esque opening chase to closecombat thrills reminiscent of The Raid to a surprisingly subdued and heartfelt ﬁnale. The Russos have heard your complaints about universe-building at the expense of story. Civil War is fun. It’s smart. It’s coherent. And, most importantly, it allows its heart to beat strongly amid the chaos. Your move, DC. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Fox Tower, Valley, Vancouver.

Captain Fantastic

A Viggo Mortensen reprises his

extreme mountain man role in the new Cannes favorite Captain Fantastic— mud-splattered, idealistic, good at killing things. But this time with six kids in tow. Mortensen plays the idealistic patriarch as a drill sergeant with believable heart. He raises his kids in isolation in the Pacific Northwest, schooling them in killing deer, the Bill of Rights, and the banjo. When he leads the brood into society for their mother’s funeral, the film becomes a quirky, emotional quest that outshines Little Miss Sunshine. Watching homeschooled children eat grocery-store rotisserie chicken, show up at a funeral in a dinosaur costume, and experience a first kiss is hilarious. Because it has pried you with cuteness, the film’s tear-jerking moments hit hard. As Mortensen relinquishes control, you realize that this is no Fellowship, it’s a film about the naked truth of parenting. R. ENID SPITZ. Clackamas, Fox Tower.

Central Intelligence

C A buddy action comedy that relies

on cheesy stunts, penis jokes and bro buﬀoonery—like most of its genre brethren—Central Intelligence is a far cry from anything resembling intelligence. Dwayne Johnson, once the overweight target of bullies in high school, shows up 20 years later as a steroid-ridden CIA agent who recruits former classmate Kevin Hart, now a number-crunching desk jockey, to help him solve a case. PG-13. MICHELLE DEVONA. Academy, Avalon, Bridgeport, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Jubitz, Kennedy School, Laurelhurst, Tigard.

The Conjuring 2

Finding Dory

B+ The sea has become a little more existential since Nemo got found. For 13 years, the entire world eagerly awaited Pixar’s sequel and the return of Ellen DeGeneres as the forgetful Dory. This time, Dory is on a quest to find her family. The Nemo clan’s all here—the SoCal sea turtle still stoned—plus the introduction of a likable, pessimistic octopus named Hank (Ed O’Neill) and catty sea lion (Idris Elba). The film keeps its Nemo charm and comedic voices while offering a more serious tone for Pixar’s message: We are all special, in our own way. You can sway to the singing stingrays, 3-D giggle at a nearsighted hammerhead shark and appreciate the humor in fish residing in a rehabilitation center for “sick” sea life. There’s tears to fill a tide pool, wit to keep adults amused, and laughs for any audience with a short attention span. You will (hopefully) remember a majority of this film. PG. AMY WOLFE. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Fox Tower, Lloyd, Oak Grove, Tigard, Vancouver.

Free State of Jones

B The trailer smacks of another story of a “great white man” pushed over the edge. Matthew McConaughey is a Mississippi farmer who turns against the Confederacy in what amounts to a less cliché retelling of a truly fascinating, forgotten bit of history. The bad guys are not the South, war or slavery (although they are all bad). The real enemies in this movie are the haves and the have nots. The ﬁlm’s struggle for liberty outlasts the main character, Newt Knight, and the Civil War, staying relevant to modern-day issues but happily devoid of any references to the present day. It’s a true epic that should sit alongside ﬁlms like Glory. R. EZRA JOHNSON-GREENOUGH. Clackamas.

Ghostbusters

A It’s been 32 years since the release of the original, and the Ghostbusters reboot has no chill. The script from Paul Feig and Kate Dippold hammers home the message that it’s 2016 and rebooting a classic Dude Comedy with an all-female cast will make people mad. Kristen Wiig, Melissa McCarthy, Kate McKinnon and Leslie Jones bring to the plate what they always have. Wiig is slightly frenetic, McCarthy has a Roseanne Barr-esque appeal, McKinnon is Harpo Marx with a functioning voice box, and Jones is loud and brash. The jokes hurtle past, and you’re excused for not laughing at all of them, because not all of them work. There are fart jokes, self-referential jokes, vagina jokes, race jokes, comedy nerd jokes, showbiz-insiderArrested Development-type jokes, all presented in a mille-feuille of irony. The movie is maximalist. At the climax, we ﬁnd a battle scene reminiscent of The Lord of the Rings, in which legions of ghosts ﬁght the Lady Ghostbusters. McCarthy gets super-powered brass knuckles while Jones shreds nerds into ectoplasm with a handheld ghost chipper. When this movie succeeds, it shows you how silly it is to get angry about a movie. When it fails, well, it fails in seizure-inducing, herniating, mind-numbing glory that makes you sort of giggle and fart anyway. It’s glorious, and if it ruined your childhood, sorry bro. PG-13. ZACH MIDDLETON. Bagdad, Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Lloyd, Oak Grove, Pioneer Place, St. Johns Pub and Theater, Tigard, Vancouver.

Hunt for the Wilderpeople

B Foster care is a less-than-ideal

situation. Ricky has been bounced from family to family for a while now, and his foster care agent takes no time to inform the new family of his long history of running away and petty crimes. And just when it looks like Ricky has found an ideal situation, his new foster mother dies. Ricky and his reluctant foster father, Hec (Sam Neill), run off into the woods. This latest offbeat film from Taika Waititi, of What We Do in the Shadows fame, searches for humor and hope in this tragic setup, with just enough bloody boar slayings, militarized foster care agents and conspiracy theories from a bumbling trailer dweller to make a coming-of-age-in-the-wilderness story feel like something you haven’t seen many times before. PG-13. JOHN LOCANTHI. Cinema 21, Hollywood, Kiggins.

CONT. on page 48

COURTESY OF UNIVERSAL PICTURES

B- First thing’s ﬁrst: The Conjuring 2 is often very scary. The story of a downtrodden British family in Enﬁeld tormented by the vengeful spirit of an old cockney man ups the voltage slowly but steadily. Never mind that the true story is report-

edly a hoax: Scary’s scary, and for at least its first hour, C2 delivers an old-school haunted-house experience of the Poltergeist variety. Thing is, we’ve seen this before. In between creating the Saw series and launching Vin Diesel off a skyscraper in Furious 7, director James Wan has more or less been revisiting the same funhouse during the course of the Insidious and Conjuring films, which are essentially interchangeable except for Conjuring’s ’70s setting. Still, Wan seems content painting over the same canvas, adding flourishes that are richer and scarier with each pass. If he wants to keep tinkering, we’ll keep coming, because when Conjuring 2 is scary, it’s in a class of its own. R. AP KRYZA. Academy, Kennedy School, Laurelhurst.

Potlander newsletter Sign up to receive the latest cannabis news, events and more at wweek.com/follow-us

JASON BOURNE Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

MOVIES Ice Age: Collision Course

Lights Out

rel Scrat bounce about the cosmos in pursuit of the coveted acorn is like watching a tragic effort to re-create the humor and entertainment one could find in say, a Looney Toons clip. The fifth installment of an already lustless franchise, Ice Age: Collision Course brings back Sid and the gang, this time on a quest to save the world from a deadly asteroid heading toward Earth. A cacophony of brazen, shrill characters coupled with a predictable and tedious plot certainly makes it seem as if that asteroid couldn’t hit soon enough. PG. MICHELLE DEVONA. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Lloyd, Milwaukie, Oak Grove, Pioneer Place, Tigard, Vancouver.

and there are horror films with stylists. Lights Out is the latter. It’s actually a well-made haunter with some effective jump scares and a couple of great laughs. A general audience will be unnerved, occasionally scared out of their wits, and probably satisfied by this old-fashioned exploration of fear of the dark. Horror enthusiasts will bemoan this tepid, overly safe foray that expands debut director David F. Sandberg’s award-winning three-minute short into a Hollywood cakewalk. Little brother Martin (Gabriel Bateman) is the most believable character, though none of the performances is poor. Big sister Rebecca (Teresa Palmer) is the bad girl protagonist whose walls are plastered with posters of major-label metal

The Infiltrator

A- Riddled with cocaine, bullets to

the head and Bryan Cranston, The Infiltrator is a delightfully bloody mess splattering the silver screen and an action-packed, gripping ride. Based on a true story, the action follows undercover agent and family man Bob Mazur (Cranston), who poses as a fraudulent banker cozying up to the big names in the Colombian drug-trafficking industry. Under the umbrella of infamous Pablo Escobar, Mazur, his audacious partner Emir (John Leguizamo) and alluring fake fiancee Kathy (Diane Kruger) try to keep the cocaine from reaching American soil. Flying stacks of bills from Florida, Central America and Europe, The Infiltrator sure makes cartel life look cushy. R. AMY WOLFE. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Fox Tower, Oak Grove, Vancouver.

C+ There are stylish horror ﬁlms,

acts like Avenged Sevenfold and Ghost—but she doesn’t listen to any metal in the entire ﬁlm. That’s probably due to budget restrictions, but Sandberg should have that solved soon enough since 5 mil isn’t much to recoup for a ghost ﬂick getting a wide release. Hopefully, he’s proven himself a capable studio lapdog and will be given a longer leash in the future. PG-13. NATHAN CARSON. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Lloyd, Oak Grove, Pioneer Place, Tigard, Vancouver.

The Lobster

B+ The Lobster is one of those dystopian sci-ﬁ movies that needs to spend the ﬁrst 30 minutes laying down the ground rules of the setting. David (Colin Farrell) is single, which is outlawed, so he goes to a singles

REVIEW MICHELE K. SHORT

C- Watching saber-toothed squir-

Independence Day: Resurgence

Director Roland Emmerich waited 20 years to revisit Independence Day. Will Smith won’t be back in his starmaking turn, but Jeﬀ Goldblum and other essential cast members are back to stammer and stare wide-eyed as monuments go boom once more. Not screened for critics. Not a good sign. PG-13. Clackamas, Eastport, Vancouver.

at io

The Jungle Book

fo r

MUSIC P.27

B+ Director Jon Favreau may have been out to show oﬀ the latest in special eﬀects, but his reverence for the classic 1967 cartoon shines through all the digital rendering. He probably should’ve thought twice before having Bill Murray sing a warbly, soulless version of the “Bare Necessities,” but even I felt a shiver of childhood nostalgia when the familiar drum beat played in the opening credits. PG. LAUREN TERRY. Academy, Avalon, Empirical, Kennedy School, Valley, Vancouver.

The Legend of Tarzan

Alexander Skarsgård and his 24-pack abs take to the jungle in an eﬀort to make me die of heat stroke. Thanks a lot, Skarsgård. Because of you, a whole generation of dudes got a gym membership for Father’s Day. But Googling Hozier’s music video—a sad man at a piano spliced with softcore porn and animal nuzzling—will give you a good idea. PG-13. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Fox Tower, Lloyd, Oak Grove, Tigard, Vancouver.

Life, Animated

A The Little Mermaid teaches autistic children writing skills in director Roger Ross Williams’ Disney doc. For most of us, Mermaid was an under-the-sea singalong and The Lion King our entree to the circle-of-life lesson, but for Owen Suskind, animation was vital for developing his reading, writing and communication skills. Life, Animated spotlights the Suskind family, based on father Ron Suskind’s book about raising his son with animation. From Owen’s initial autism diagnosis to the now-23-year-old moving out of his parents’ home, the ﬁlm is conversational, with one-on-one interviews with each family member. It’s hard to hate Disney while watching Owen communicate ﬂawlessly through memorized movie lines as cartoons play onscreen, presenting an intimate picture of life according to Owen. PG. AMY WOLFE. Bridgeport, City Center, Fox Tower.

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

FRESH MILF: Mila Kunis, Kristen Bell and Kathryn Hahn.

Harper Valley T&A

Hangovers loom large in the films of Jon Lucas and Scott Moore (21 & Over, The Change-Up, The Hangover). Not just actual ones, but the lingering haze as youthful passions awaken to the throbbing responsibilities of adulthood. Bad Moms opens with one of our titular heroines reciting her daily litany of First World problems. She works long hours for a startup, where she’s taken for granted by millennial scatterbrains, and her shiftless husband sought out a cam model for a quasi-affair. Motherhood doesn’t complete her. After one bad day’s accumulated frustrations force Amy (Mila Kunis) to flee a glorious marriage, job and the PTA, she forms a booze-drenched MILF pack with slatternly Carla (Kathryn Hahn) and wallflower Kiki (Kristen Bell). Cue the inexplicably raucous party, supermarket-destruction montage, dreamy young widower (Jay Hernandez) and chief antagonist (Christina Applegate as supermom Gwendolyn). It’s a simple formula, one that Lucas and Moore unfold briskly by sacrificing storyline for the sake of leftfield guest stars (Wanda Sykes, J.J. Watt) and one-liners. Lucas and Moore’s central thesis is not, as Kunis trills during a PTA speech, that all moms are bad on occasion. Instead, the filmmakers argue that no moms are always good, which isn’t quite the same thing. Like The Hangover, which didn’t so much praise marriage as tar bachelorhood and bro-life idylls, Bad Moms highlights the inevitable downsides of parenting to make everything above minimal parental effort seem comically pretentious. When helicoptering doesn’t work, why clean the rotors? It is bleak worldview, to be sure, and also a damnably effective means of forestalling critique. The film so completely ignores genre format—the character arcs read like seismographs—that we’re hardly surprised when Bell reshapes her marriage with a single phone call and Applegate redeems herself by whisking her new friends away to Paris to go shopping. The film simplifies human choices to animalistic instinct. Sudden, 180-degree life changes seem like afterthoughts. The film rides on appealing actors tossing non sequiturs back and forth in a series of wish-fulfillment scenarios. When confronted with such fundamental emptiness of vision, there’s little sense getting angry. We’re just very, very disappointed. JAY HORTON. Bad Moms proves things only get worse when The Hangover wears oﬀ.

C SEE IT: Bad Moms is rated R. It opens Friday at most Portlandarea theaters.

Love & Friendship

B+ Kate Beckinsale stars in Whit Stillman’s vicious comedy of manners as Lady Susan Vernon, an accomplished flirt and recent widow who guilts her sister-in-law into hosting her and then brings a maelstrom of drama into the household. Lady Susan may have no shame, but Beckinsale plays up her character’s propriety, always pronouncing her witty, backhanded comments with a composed pout. R. LAUREN TERRY. Fox Tower.

Maggie’s Plan

B Greta Gerwig plays a chronically single woman who falls for a wannabe novelist, matched by a terrifically severe performance from Julianne Moore as the novelist’s wife. From writer-director Rebecca Miller, the film’s ambience is the heir to ’70s Woody Allen, right down to the gypsy jazz. R. CHANCE SOLEM-PFEIFER. Laurelhurst.

Me Before You

D Take me back to before I witnessed the train wreck that is Me Before You. Based on Jo Jo Moyes’ bestselling novel, it’s no surprise the film’s death with dignity plot is already suffering backlash ranging from angry twitter hashtags to picketing outside film screenings. Spontaneously ditzy Lou (Emilia Clarke) is hired to care for Will Turner (Sam Claflin), a job that includes trying to convince Turner he shouldn’t end his life because of a disability he suffers from since an accident years ago. PG-13. AMY WOLFE. Academy, Vancouver.

Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates

C Based on a true story of hard-partying brothers Mike and Dave Stangle (Adam DeVine and Zac Efron), this summer comedy is a frat fantasy in which the Stangles use Craigslist to find parent-friendly dates for their sister’s wedding. Writers Andrew Jay Cohen and Brendan O’Brien rely on the dynamic between Efron’s straight man and DeVine’s screeching tantrums, but their lack of comedic chemistry fails to carry the simple storyline. Anna Kendrick plays the neurotic sweetheart, Alice, whose best friend (Aubrey Plaza) sees the Hawaiian wedding as a free vacation. They play their girlnext-door parts well, until marijuana smoke starts rolling out of their room. But switching the roles would’ve been funnier here, with Kendrick as the bad girl who trades oral sex for Rihanna tickets, and Plaza as a twittering mess who falls for DeVine’s soft side. R. LAUREN TERRY. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Fox Tower, Living Room Theaters, Lloyd, Tigard, Vancouver.

The Music of Strangers

B Within the first few moments of

the film, some of the world’s best musicians are seen playing an eclectic tune in an open-air market adjacent to the sea, defying any notions one might have had about an orchestral documentary. Morgan Neville (director of 20 Feet From Stardom) returns to a musical theme while following Yo-Yo Ma’s unlikely international supergroup through the struggles of war, bigotry, isolation and cultural exchange. PG-13. CURTIS COOK. Fox Tower, Kiggins.

The Nice Guys

A- The Nice Guys exists in some

weird, hyperviolent mirror image of Los Angeles—one that looks a lot like Atlanta. It’s like Roger Rabbit’s Toontown, but populated with cartoons that bleed. The movie plays like a 1970s spiritual sequel to writer-director Shane Black’s 2005 Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, a winking landmark of self-aware grit that revitalized Robert Downey Jr.’s career. And it’s kind of perfect. The plot is inconsequential, involving a dead porn star, a bunch of gangsters, a missing student, some more gangsters and the

auto industry. But all of that is just an excuse to get its perfectly cast stars lobbing insults.This movie starts at full speed and never stops. R. AP KRYZA. Academy, Laurelhurst, Valley, Vancouver.

Now You See Me 2

C- A hyperbolic spectacle more than anything else, Now You See Me 2 supersedes its predecessor on every level of absurdity. Jesse Eisenberg leads the Four Horsemen in his usual irritatingly haughty fashion as the gang goes on a mission to steal a computer chip that can control the world. Trying too hard to be cool with a string of tricks each more ridiculous than the next, the flashy caper proves anything but magical. PG-13. MICHELLE DEVONA. Avalon, Clackamas, Jubitz, Vancouver.

Our Kind of Traitor

B- It is not great like Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, but Our Kind of Traitor satisfies in a pinch. The everyman anchoring Traitor is poetry professor Perry Makepeace (Ewan McGregor), who looks less like the chinless wimp his name implies and more like Movie Star McGregor with longish hair. If Makepeace were the recluse his name implies, we might be more engaged when he is thrown into the company of dashing MI6 agents and burly Russian mafiosos. R. ZACH MIDDLETON. Fox Tower.

Popstar

C Even if it doesn’t bring to screen a

Wayne Campbell or a Blues Brother, Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping is an SNL movie. From the music parody trio the Lonely Island (Andy Samberg, Jorma Taccone, Akiva Schaffer), the mockumented rise and fall of famemongering musician Conner4Real is a sketch’s sensibility spread thinly, or simply repeated, across a film’s length. R. CHANCE SOLEM-PFEIFER. Laurelhurst.

The Purge: Election Year

C- This third installment finally delivers the fleshed out storyline the Purge series deserves, but our violent reality offscreen makes this fiction a lot less appealing. Veteran director James DeMonaco this time broadens the story to show us the world that thought up this one day a year when you can commit any crime. The story would be more entertaining if the script exercised greater subtlety. Instead, onedimensional characters spell out health insurance reform and Trump rhetoric, combined with nightmarish imagery of murder tourists from Germany and sadistic girl gangs waving AK-47s. R. LAUREN TERRY. Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Vancouver.

The Secret Life of Pets

Louis C.K. voices a pampered terrier who gets sucked from his NYC home into a tough gang of pets set on punishing the people who’ve wronged them. It looks heart-rending like Pixar and candy-colored like Minions, with Kevin Hart as the cherry on top. PG. Beaverton, Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Lloyd, Milwaukie, Moreland, Oak Grove, Pioneer Place, St. Johns 1 & 2, Tigard, Vancouver.

The Shallows

C+ In spite of the worrying combi-

nation of Blake Lively, a computergenerated shark, and director Jaume Collet-Serra (House of Wax), many critics welcomed The Shallows as a relief from the sequels and summer superhero flicks. But drone shots of an aquamarine coastline do not a good film make. The story follows basic action-movie format: Nancy (Blake Lively) is taking time off from med school to retrace her late mother’s surfing tour through Mexico. Once you make it past the ill-fitting techno music as Nancy paddles into the break and a hungry shark strands her on a rock, the film grows into a decent thriller. PG-13. LAUREN TERRY. Clackamas, Eastport.

as they build all the necessary tools for life in space entirely from scratch using materials like steel and plywood. A stepby-step tutorial with hints of comedy in every narrated scene, this film is an intimate look into the creative process behind a simulated space mission. It may be just an art project, but director Van Neistat playfully brings that project to life. NR. AMY WOLFE. Living Room Theaters.

Star Trek Beyond

The 13th Trek movie has been heralded as a return to good, old-fashioned fun for the series. In Beyond, Chris Pine and his Enterprise crew go head to head with Idris Elba as the villain Krall. Not screened for critics. PG-13. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, CineMagic, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Lloyd, Oak Grove, Pioneer Place, Roseway, St. Johns 1 & 2, Tigard, Vancouver.

Swiss Army Man

B+ Known as the “Daniel Radcliffe farting corpse boner movie” since its Sundance premiere, Swiss Army Man somehow makes flatulence and an erection even more preposterously important than that description suggests. Together, they are symbols of body positivity, courtesy of a cadaver. The living member of this two-man show is Hank (Paul Dano), who opens the movie in preparation to hang himself on a deserted island. What stops him is a dapper corpse (Radcliffe) washing ashore. Hank will come to call the body “Manny,” and it will start farting almost immediately. This debut feature from Dan Kwan and Daniel Scheinert finds its keel with Dano carrying the corpse inland, convinced of its magic. In gorgeous, intense montage sequences, the actors make their own world from flotsam and litter. Swiss Army Man is surrealist like Calvin & Hobbes is. R. CHANCE SOLEM-PFEIFER. Fox Tower, Hollywood.

Warcraft

D+ With Warcraft, writer-director Duncan Jones has managed to squander the creative momentum and critical goodwill he’s amassed, presenting another generic and listless excursion into a wasteland of storytelling misery. Die-hard veterans of the games will find fun in seeing icons come to a bizarre sort of life, but the incomprehensible spectacle will crush the uninitiated. PG-13. MIKE GALLUCCI. Vancouver.

Weiner

A His name is Anthony Weiner, and

he’s been busted for dick pics (again). “And for that, I am profoundly sorry,” he says over and over, trying to affect the perfect tone of sincerity. The unprecedented level of access to its subject makes Weiner a necessary and unflinching look at how the sausage of modern politics gets made. R. ZACH MIDDLETON. Laurelhurst.

X-Men: Apocalypse

B+ The latest in the X-franchise proves that the Marvel Cinematic Universe is not the only home for A-grade superhero fare. With Apocalypse, writer Bryan Singer has finally steered the ship back on course, crafting one of the greatest comics pictures to date. The film opens in ancient Egypt, introducing the titular villain as the first mutant. Oscar Isaac portrays the blue-skinned Apocalypse then, aping Marlon Brando in Apocalypse Now. Jennifer Lawrence and Michael Fassbender return as Mystique and Magneto, respectively, and Hugh Jackman makes a brief but satisfying cameo as the pre-Wolverine Mutant X. Factions on the internet will inevitably find reasons to hate this movie. The Egyptians will be too pale for some. The question is: Do you want to have fun and enjoy a comic book turned into a quarter-billion-dollar feature film or would you rather stay home reading Proust? PG-13. NATHAN CARSON. Empirical, Tigard.

A Space Program

A- A mission to Mars goes from mechanical to artistic in this doc following artist Tom Sachs and his team

AP FILM STUDIES RICK VODICKA

retreat. But there is one catch: If you don’t find a mate within 60 days, you will be turned into an animal. On the plus side, you get to pick your animal. David chooses the lobster. Interesting concept, though this vision of the future mostly involves Farrell, John C. Reilly, Rachel Weisz and the rest of cast speaking in a dull, passionless monotone. R. JOHN LOCANTHI. Academy, Laurelhurst.

For more Movies listings, visit

Summer Point Break OUR FILM COLUMNIST IS AT THE BEACH. BILL MURRAY IS… EVERYWHERE. BY A P kRYz A

@APkryza

EDITOR’S NOTE: For this year’s summer vacation from AP Film Studies, our intrepid columnist is celebrating the 25th anniversary of Point Break by subsisting on meatball sandwiches and Coronas while combing the sands of Cannon Beach (which doubled as Australia in the film) in search of stray tresses of Patrick Swayze’s hair. Until he returns, here’s what’s playing at PDX’s indie theaters. Church of Film wraps its Queer Cinema run with Werner Schroeter’s trippy, jarring Willow Springs, centered on a desert cult of murderous women. Clinton Street Theater. 8 pm Wednesday, July 27. Were it not for The Big Lebowski, Bill Murray’s Ernie McCracken in the Farrelly brothers’ oft-overlooked Kingpin might have been the greatest movie character ever to grace a bowling alley. If there’s a heaven, there’s a crossover film starring John Turturro and Murray playing on a loop. Pix Pâtisserie. Dusk Wednesday, July 27. Oh shit, look, it’s Bill Murray again! In Meatballs, playing a camp counselor who’s zany and fun and…wait, is it just me or is he also kiiinda rapey? And by kinda I mean a lot. Summer camp kinda sucks. Mission Theater. Opens Wednesday, July 27. Four years before Do the Right Thing, Spike Lee helped launch the independent film movement—and his own reputation as masterful auteur provocateur—with his examination of polyamory and gender bias in She’s Gotta Have It. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7 pm Thursday, July 28. Legendary synth/cosmic musician the Space Lady comes out of retirement to accompany “Science Is Fiction,” the surrealist science-fiction films of French filmmaker Jean Painleve, at the final Mississippi Records Music & Film Series screening of the year. Also, in case you need reminding, there are a shitload of dispensaries down the street from the theater. Hollywood Theatre. 7:30 pm Thursday, July 28. Flicks on the Bricks presents the still-glorious Disney classic Aladdin, ensuring yet another generation of kids will pretend to understand the Genie’s Ed Sullivan and Jack Nicholson impressions. Pioneer Courthouse Square. Dusk Friday, July 29. West Side Story is the latest classic to get the sing-along treatment. Mission Theater. Opens Friday, July 29. A rare remake that tops the original, 1978’s Invasion of the Body Snatchers is a landmark of paranoid cinema, and one of the most perfectly cynical horror films of all time. Laurelhurst Theater. July 29-Aug. 4. With its acrobatic wire work, poetic storytelling and backdrop of folklore, wuxia pioneer King Hu’s 1971 trailblazer A Touch of Zen laid the groundwork for everything from Crouching Tiger to The Matrix and martial-arts fantasy of the past 40 years. And it’s still a breathtaking three hours of cinematic bliss. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7 pm Saturday, 4:30 pm Sunday, July 30-31. The NW Film Center’s retrospective of Bette Davis’ and Joan Collins’ respective films focuses on two of Davis’ collaborations with William Wyler: 1940’s dark drama The Letter (Sunday) and 1941’s Shakespearean power struggle Little Foxes (Monday). NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7 pm Sunday-Monday, July 31-Aug. 1. The week of Bill Murray concludes with The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou, in which Murray does his damnedest to perk up the most Wes Anderson-y film that Wes Anderson ever Wes Andersoned. Cartopia. 9 pm Sunday, July 31. Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

MEGAN NANNA

ORGANIC IN-HOUSE USE

end roll

JILLYBEAN HARLEQUIN KABERRY SHISHKABERRY CHILLAX SOUR APPLE PPLE 1979 NW VAUGHN ST. SUITE B PORTLAND, OR 97209 HOURS: 11-7, 7 days a week Just North of the Pearl District.

WWW.VESSELPDX.COM

$4 ONE GRAM PRE ROLLS LLS OF ORGANIC JILLYBEAN! ILLYBEAN!

ALL ORGANIC AT ONLY $20 AN EIGHTH TAX INCLUDED!

Jobs for the Food and Drink Industry Staffing solutions for owners and managers NYC/ CHI/ SFO/ SEA /PDX/ AUS

Untitled-2 1

6/10/12 9:41 AM

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

Portland’s Poshest Pot Shop Yet BY LAU R EN TER RY

@LaurenYTerry

By now, you’ve probably noticed an increased subtlety to the storefronts of cannabis dispensaries. Portland’s newest shops look less like stoner dens and more like mysterious botany stores. For long-term patients, it’s jarring to reconcile these shiny new dispensaries with the bulletproof windows that budtenders slid our Ziploc baggie of medicine through a few years ago. Many customers still feel a breeze of shame as they walk away with a brown bag wadded in their palm. “When I talked to people about v i s i t i n g d i s p e n sa r i e s, t h e y sounded like they felt guilty, like walking into a porn shop,” says Portland native Cambria Benson, director of marketing for Serra dispensary. So Benson set out to create a space where customers feel comfortable shopping for cannabis without any sense of wrongdoing. And she succeeded. When you leave Serra, the feeling is similar to leaving Anthropologie: slightly numbed by the curated beauty of the place, a sense of being underdressed, but without the guilt of paying too much for something you’ll ruin in one smoke sesh. The reception desk at Serra’s Southeast Belmont Street shop resembles the lobby of a boutique hotel. At Serra’s new downtown location on Southwest 1st Avenue, there’s a La Marzocco espresso machine on the white granite tabletop. From the gold details on the light fixtures to the origamiwrapped chopsticks for measuring buds, the chic setup uses every opportunity to incorporate minimalist sophistication. That includes the dainty, greenhouse-style display cases. The combinationlock stash bags for sale can double as stylish leather clutches, and the rose-gold grinders look like they belong in a velvet-cushioned Rolex case. Across the room from the modest edible/con-

centrate selection from vendors like Luminous Botanicals and Wyld gummies sit impossibly trendy ombre pipes from Hacienda Ware, Summerland ceramic bongs, and the best old-time joint roller in Portland. Benson and her team take the inventory as seriously as the design. Rather than the limited and illogical binary of indica and sativa, you can select a combination of six “feelings” when deciding your strain from the array of indigostained ceramic dishes: relaxation, focus, creativity, happiness, pain relief and energy. Serra worked with Pruf Cultivar on customized strains for its menu, and carries local vendors at each location. With a shop in Eugene, Serra has easy access to Southern Oregon flower. After describing my ideal strain as “happiness, energy and creativity,” I was recommended Smarties, a strain with 25.5 percent THC—and you feel every bit of that. Reflective of its kush genes, Smarties has a sweet, skunky scent, and provides a happy, sociable high. Although it didn’t make me lazy, I spent a lot of that focused energy editing a picture of my cat for Instagram. Luxury dispensaries are not without critics, of course. This high-end pot shop replaced the beloved Belmont Bodega, and I can imagine old-school stoners grumbling about the pink mood crystals on the shelves and the posh furnishings. But peel back the sleek decor and you’ll find sincere people with their hearts and business in the right place. Serra’s high-quality medicine is pricier than most because it’s carefully grown, and the shop is doing good work to educate the public about the complexities of cannabis genetics. GO: Serra, 2519 SE Belmont St., 971-544-7055; 220 SW 1st Ave., 971-279-5613; serracannabis.com. 10 am-10 pm MondaySaturday, 11 am-7 pm Sunday.

W W S TA F F

BY N AT E WAG G O N E R

This Was Once A Great Polo Town

Cat and Girl

BY DR. MITCHELL MILLAR

2220 NW QUIMBY STREET, PORTLAND, OREGON

I sometimes go to the TriMet lost and found, look upon its blue doors and remember the gates to the rickety grandstands that used to be there, that would pack thousands during the salad days of the Portland Berries, the city’s beloved professional polo team. How I miss going to Berries games at Bush Stadium—or, as we faithful called it, “the Berry Bush.” The unmistakable thunder of 32 hooves trampling the great squared oval, the thwack of the mallet and the whoosh of the ball, and the rabid, chanting fans. Many longtime Portland residents probably realize that most of the chants sung by the Timbers Army were co-opted from chants originally used to cheer the Berries. I don’t mind. The Timbers are probably the closest thing we have to the Berries these days, and I will venture to Providence Park for an occasional game. Just don’t blame me if I share with you that compared to what an afternoon at the Berry Bush was like, most Timbers games remind me of preschool nap time. Portland was once called “America’s Greatest Polo City” by Sports Illustrated. This was not only because the Berries were winning and selling out every game, but also because for several years the city had a second professional polo team called the Portland Lavender. This was an interesting case. The Lavender were a better team than the Berries, but this was because they played in the Pan-Pacific Polo Federation. As anyone who follows the sport of kings knows, the PPPF is a prestigious polo league based in Oceania and coastal Asia that, at the time, was seeing extraordinary growth in popularity. The PPPF wanted to tap into an American market. What better market than America’s Greatest Polo City? There were significant logistical problems with being a professional sports team in a league where every other team was at least 7,000 miles away. The biggest obstacle to success was that the Lavender would play in Portland for just three weeks of the 20-week season. That meant only five games at Civic Stadium, and the rest of the time the team was traveling in exotic locales. I also wonder about the poor horses, and what an emotional and physical toll all that seafaring took on them. Sadly, the Portland Berries folded—not because of a lack of fan interest but rather a lack of interest in every other team in every other city. A few years later, it was announced that the Portland Lavender were relocating to Canberra. And thus did Portland’s reign as “America’s Greatest Polo City” come to an end. Dr. Mitchell Millar can be reached via a wooden drop box somewhere in Forest Park. If you don’t know where it is, you may find out eventually. If you need to reach Dr. Millar urgently, go into the photo booth at the Avalon arcade with the out-of-order sign. Insert $3 and say your message after the tone. Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

TICKETS ON SALE AT

PORTLAND.PROJECTPABST.COM

Willamette Week JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

SUNDAY AUGUST 28 SATURDAY AUGUST 27

21+

DURAN DURAN ICE CUBE

/ NATHANIEL / RATELIFF

STRFKR / & THE NIGHT SWEATS A$AP FERG / ANDREW W.K. / LIZZO THE COATHANGERS / KYLE CRAFT

TAME IMPALA / WEEN / DRIVE LIKE JEHU

UNKNOWN MORTAL ORCHESTRA PARQUET COURTS / SHEER MAG HOP ALONG

/ DIARRHEA PLANET / TENEMENT

WATERFRONT PARK

PORTLAND, OR

JULY 27, 2016

CLASSIFIEDS

TO PLACE AN AD CONTACT:

WELLNESS

MATT PLAMBECK

53 54 55

WELLNESS, PETS, PIXIE PETS, EMPLOYMENT, SERVICES, BULLETIN BOARD, REAL ESTATE, MUSICIANS MARKET CHATLINES, ADULT, JONESIN’

REAL ESTATE

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY, INSIDE BACK COVER

503-445-2757 • mplambeck@wweek.com

SERVICES

JOBS

COUNSELING

TREE SERVICES STEVE GREENBERG TREE SERVICE Pruning and removals, stump grinding. 24-hour emergency service. Licensed/ Insured. CCB#67024. Free estimates. 503-284-2077

BUILDING/REMODELING

BULLETIN BOARD WILLAMETTE WEEK’S GATHERING PLACE NON-PROFIT DISCOUNTS AVAILABLE.

SHOCKMAN THERAPY, LLC COUNSELING SERVICES Extreme Stress Exposure Specialist Couple’s Therapy

McMenamins Portland locations are now hiring Line Cooks! Hiring locations include The Ram’s Head, Blue Moon, White Eagle, Ringlers, Broadway and Bagdad Theater. Qualified applicants must be open to cooking in a high-volume and busy pub environment. Qualified applicants will have an open & flexible schedule including days/eve/weekend/holiday availability, and a positive and professional demeanor. Previous kitchen experience is a plus, but we are willing to train the right applicant if you are eager to learn. Please apply online 24/7 at mcmenamins.com or pick up an application at any McMenamins location. Mail your complete application to: McMenamins attn: HR 430 N. Killingsworth St. Portland, OR 97217 or fax to: (503) 221-8749. Please no phone calls or emails to individual locations!!! EOE

ADOPTION ***ADOPTION:***

Happily Married, Successful Executive & Loving Stay-Home-Mom yearn for baby to devote our lives. Expenses paid 1-800-352-5741 *Marie & Stefan*

ANNOUNCEMENTS HAULING/MOVING LJ’S HAULING ANYTHING Removal of Metal/Cars free 503-839-7222

ALL AREAS - ROOMMATES.COM. Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: www.Roommates.com.

Rate: $85/hr www.shockman-therapy.com 503-866-4806

MASSAGE (LICENSED)

INDULGE YOURSELF in an - AWESOME FULL BODY MASSAGE

call

Charles

503-740-5120

lmt#6250

FOR FREE ADS in 'Musicians Wanted,' 'Musicians Available' & 'Instruments for Sale' go to portland.backpage.com and submit ads online. Ads taken over the phone in these categories cost $5.

NOW HIRING BUS DRIVERS

$14.58/hr + (DOE) + Benefits Union job - guaranteed hours • Paid Training If you enjoy young people, we can teach you to drive the bus! Apply at PPS.net or call 503-916-6901

Margie’s Pot Shop

ON TWITTER

Just for the fun of it

PETS

• POT • WAX • SHATTER • VAPE PENS

PETS FOR SALE ROTTWEILER AKC PUPPIES Excellent temperament &pedigrees. Parents are our family pets Lovable Big Babies $700 and up 360-442-3161

If you or your business would like to sponsor a pet in one of our upcoming Pet Showcases, contact: Matt Plambeck 503-445-2757

MUSICIANS MARKET

Portland Public Schools

FOLLOW @ WWE E K

Changing the image of rescue, one animal at a time... Interested in adopting from the Pixie Project CALL 503.542.3433

CLASSES

BE SOMEONE SPECIAL

REL A X!

• GLASS • EDIBLES • $5 JOINTS • $10 GRAMS

• $30 EIGHTHS • QUALITY BUDS and so much more! 509-493-0441

405 E Steuben /SR 14, Bingen, WA 98605 This product may be habit forming. Do not take over state lines. For use by adults 21 and over. Keep out of reach of children.

BEVVY

BUSTER

MARGERY

S P O N SO R E D BY

richearthorganicspa.com

ritualartspdx.com

www.furryfrenzypets.com

CLASSES AT BEE THINKING Meadmaking, Beeswax 101, Beekeeping, Honey Recipes, and more!!! Now Enrolling (877) 325-2221 www.beethinking.com Visit our retail space at 1551 SE Poplar.

LESSONS CLASSICAL PIANO/ KEYBOARD ALL AGES. STANDARDS, CLASSICAL, MUSICALS. EUROPEAN TRAINED. PORTLAND 503-227-6557

YOU ARE WATCHED The LORD looks down from HEAVEN upon the children of men, to see if there were any that did understand - and SEEK GOD. But (usually) they are all gone astray, they have become all together filthy; there is none that does GOOD; No, not one! However, YOU (LORD) will show ME the PATH-of-LIFE. (Now join US in Prayer, that Portland will find and follow God’s Path-of-Life)

WWEEK.COM

MIKEY

TRADEUPMUSIC.COM Buying, selling, instruments of every shape and size. Open 11am-7pm every day. 4701 SE Division & 1834 NE Alberta.

MUSIC LESSONS Play what you want to play.

MISCELLANEOUS

S P O N SO R E D BY

INSTRUMENTS FOR SALE

LEARN PIANO ALL STYLES, LEVELS Beginners welcome.

With 2-time Grammy winner Peter Boe 503-274-8727

ROXANNE

ZOE

S P O N SO RE D BY

Green Dog Pet Supply greendogpetsupply.com

www.petsonbroadway.com

Willamette Week Classifieds JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

TO PLACE AN AD CONTACT:

MATT PLAMBECK

503-445-2757 • mplambeck@wweek.com

CHATLINES

Strike a LiveMatch!

JONESIN’

by Matt Jones

“Freeky”–no theme, no problem. 54 Part of a squirrel’s 45-Down 55 Enclosure for a major wrestling match 59 Frank Zappa’s “___ Yerbouti” 60 TV relative from Bel-Air 61 Garden plant that thrives in shade 62 Game where players catch ... ah, whatever, I’m not interested

FREE CHATROOMS 24/7

FREE 1on1 8-9PM daily

ALWAYS FREE to chat with VIP members

(Unlimited VIP membership $15/week. No worries about minutes.)

Portland 503-222-CHAT Vancouver 360-314-CHAT

Salem 503-428-5748 • Eugene 541-636-9099 • Bend 541-213-2444 Seattle 206-753-CHAT •Albany (541)248-1481 • Medford (541)326-4000

or WEB PHONE on LiveMatch.com

MAN to MAN

Free Live chatrooms & forums! 503-222-6USA

Across 1 Like a perfect makeup job 10 Beach resorts, Italian-style 15 Right-click result, often 16 “Vega$” actor Robert 17 Words that follow “Damn it, Jim” 18 Cobra Commander’s nemesis 19 Prairie State sch. 20 Texas facility that opened on May 15, 1993

22 Show with Digital Shorts, for short 23 Llama relatives 25 Word after cargo or fish 26 Bovary and Tussaud, for two 28 Like some fails 30 Ear inflammation 31 Ice Bucket Challenge cause 32 Mobile ___ 36 “Smallville” family 37 “Don’t Stop ___ You Get Enough” 38 Madrigal refrain 39 Boundary-pushing 40 Seaver or Selleck

41 Dakota’s language family 42 Torme’s forte 44 Filler phrase from Rodney Dangerfield, perhaps 45 Caps or cone preceder 48 Her feast day is Jan. 21 50 Internet routing digits (hidden in WASN’T) 51 Cold dish made with diced tomatoes, mint, and lemon juice 53 Crooked course segment

Down 1 Cheech and Chong’s first movie 2 Put on a ticket 3 Captain ___ (Groucho Marx’s “Animal Crackers” role) 4 Puddle gunk 5 Prefix with “nym” 6 “Breaking Bad” network 7 Draws from again, like a maple tree 8 ___ Gay (WWII B-29) 9 CopperTop maker 10 Classic “Dracula” star Bela 11 Crocus or freesia, botanically 12 City known for its mustard 13 “___ All Ye Faithful” 14 Bed-in-a-bag item 21 Weather Channel displays 23 English novelist Kingsley 24 Primus leader Claypool 27 Bar assoc.

members 29 Song often sung outdoors 31 Go for a target 33 CNN anchor of the 2000s 34 Is an active jazz musician, perhaps 35 Seat of Tom Green County 37 Sums 38 50-50 situations? 40 Duo with the 2003 hit “All the Things She Said” 41 Office building abbr. 43 Dolphins Hall of Famer Larry 44 Place for “Holidays,” according to a 2011 P.J. O’Rourke title 45 Tuck away 46 ___ cheese 47 Reeded instruments 49 “(I Can’t ___) Satisfaction” 52 “Blimey!” blurter 56 Palindromic 1998 Busta Rhymes album 57 “Solaris” author Stanislaw ___ 58 “___ Sharkey” (Don Rickles sitcom of the ‘70s) last week’s answers

©2016 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com) For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle #JONZ790.

ENTERTAINMENT

REAL PEOPLE REAL DESIRE REAL FUN.

Classified

Since 1955 Open to 2:30 am 365 days a year

Try FREE: 503-416-7098 More Local Numbers: 1-800-926-6000 Ahora español Livelinks.com 18+

MORE TO LOVE ONLINE

@ WWEEK.COM 54

Willamette Week Classifieds JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

Over 30 great dancers and a friendly all-female staﬀ 129 SW Broadway

503-227-3023

www.marysclub.com

TO PLACE AN AD CONTACT:

MATT PLAMBECK

Week of July 28

BACK COVER CONTINUED... TO PLACE AN AD ON BACK COVER CONTINUED call 503-445-2757

ARIES (March 21-April 19) Free your body. Don’t ruminate and agonize about it. FREE YOUR BODY! Be brave and forceful. Do it simply and easily. Free your gorgeously imperfect, wildly intelligent body. Allow it to be itself in all of its glory. Tell it you’re ready to learn more of its secrets and adore its mysteries. Be in awe of its unfathomable power to endlessly carry out the millions of chemical reactions that keep you alive and thriving. How can you not be overwhelmed with gratitude for your hungry, curious, unpredictable body? Be grateful for its magic. Love the blessings it bestows on you. Celebrate its fierce animal elegance. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) The people of many cultures have imagined the sun god as possessing masculine qualities. But in some traditions, the Mighty Father is incomplete without the revitalizing energies of the Divine Mother. The Maoris, for example, believe that every night the solar deity has to marinate in her nourishing uterine bath. Otherwise he wouldn’t be strong enough to rise in the morning. And how does this apply to you? Well, you currently have resemblances to the weary old sun as it dips below the horizon. I suspect it’s time to recharge your powers through an extended immersion in the deep, dark waters of the primal feminine. GEMINI (May 21-June 20) An Interesting Opportunity is definitely in your vicinity. It may slink tantalizingly close to you in the coming days, even whisper your name from afar. But I doubt that it will knock on your door. It probably won’t call you seven times on the phone or flash you a big smile or send you an engraved invitation. So you should make yourself alert for the Interesting Opportunity’s unobtrusive behavior. It could be a bit shy or secretive or modest. Once you notice it, you may have to come on strong -you know, talk to it sweetly or ply it with treats. CANCER (June 21-July 22) [Editor’s note: The counsel offered in the following oracle was channeled from the Goddess by Rob Brezsny. If you have any problems with it, direct your protests to the Queen Wow, not Brezsny.] It’s time to get more earthy and practical about practicing your high ideals and spiritual values. Translate your loftiest intentions into your most intimate behavior. Ask yourself, “How does Goddess want me to respond when my co-worker pisses me off?”, or “How would Goddess like me to brush my teeth and watch TV and make love?” For extra credit, get a tshirt that says, “Goddess was my co-pilot, but we crashlanded in the wilderness and I was forced to eat her.” LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) Be alert for white feathers gliding on the wind. Before eating potato chips, examine each one to see if it bears a likeness of Rihanna or the Virgin Mary. Keep an eye out, too, for portents like robots wearing dreadlocked wigs or antique gold buttons lying in the gutter or senior citizens cursing at invisible Martians. The appearance of anomalies like these will be omens that suggest you will soon be the recipient of crazy good fortune. But if you would rather not wait around for chance events to trigger your good luck, simply make it your fierce intention to generate it. Use your optimism-fueled willpower and your flair for creative improvisation. You will have abundant access to these talents in the coming weeks. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) You have just begun your big test. How are you doing so far? According to my analysis, the preliminary signs suggest that you have a good chance of proving the old maxim, “If it doesn’t make you so crazy that you put your clothes on inside-out and try to kiss the sky until you cry, it will help you win one of your biggest arguments with Life.” In fact, I suspect we will ultimately see you undergo at least one miraculous and certifiably melodramatic transformation. A wart on your attitude could dissolve, for example. A luminous visitation may heal one of your blind spots. You might find a satisfactory substitute for kissing the sky.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) For many years, my occupation was “starving artist.” I focused on improving my skills as a writer and musician, even though those activities rarely earned me any money. To ensure my survival, I worked as little as necessary at low-end jobs -- scrubbing dishes at restaurants, digging ditches for construction companies, delivering newspapers in the middle of the night, and volunteering for medical experiments. During the long hours spent doing tasks that had little meaning to me, I worked diligently to remain upbeat. One trick that worked well was imagining future scenes when I would be engaged in exciting creative work that paid me a decent wage. It took a while, but eventually those visions materialized in my actual life. I urge you to try this strategy in the coming months, Libra. Harness your mind’s eye in the service of generating the destiny you want to inhabit. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): You have every right to celebrate your own personal Independence Day sometime soon. In fact, given the current astrological omens, you’d be justified in embarking on a full-scale emancipation spree in the coming weeks. It will be prime time to seize more freedom and declare more autonomy and build more self-sufficiency. Here’s an important nuance to the work you have ahead of you: Make sure you escape the tyranny of not just the people and institutions that limit your sovereignty, but also the voices in your own head that tend to hinder your flow. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Of all the forbidden fruits that you fantasize about, which one is your favorite? Among the intriguing places you consider to be outside of your comfort zone, which might inspire you to redefine the meaning of “comfort”? The coming weeks will be a favorable time to reconfigure your relationship with these potential catalysts. And while you’re out on the frontier dreaming of fun experiments, you might also want to flirt with other wild cards and strange attractors. Life is in the mood to tickle you with useful surprises. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) You have a special talent for accessing wise innocence. In some ways you’re virginal, fresh, and raw, and in other ways you’re mature, seasoned, and well-developed. I hope you will regard this not as a confusing paradox but rather as an exotic strength. With your inner child and your inner mentor working in tandem, you could accomplish heroic feats of healing. Their brilliant collaboration could also lead to the mending of an old rift. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) “Where is everybody when I need them?” Even if you haven’t actually spoken those words recently, I’m guessing the voices in your head have whispered them. But from what I can tell, that complaint will soon be irrelevant. It will no longer match reality. Your allies will start offering more help and resources. They may not be perfectly conscientious in figuring out how to be of service, but they’ll be pretty good. Here’s what you can do to encourage optimal results: 1. Purge your low, outmoded expectations. 2. Open your mind and heart to the possibility that people can change. 3. Humbly ask -- out loud, not just in the privacy of your imagination -- for precisely what you want. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) Millions of Pisceans less fortunate than you won’t read this horoscope. Uninformed about the rocky patch of Yellow Brick Road that lies just ahead, they may blow a gasket or get a flat tire. You, on the other hand, will benefit from my oracular foreshadowing, as well as my inside connections with the Lords of Funky Karma. You will therefore be likely to drive with relaxed caution, keeping your vehicle unmarred in the process. That’s why I’m predicting that although you may not arrive speedily at the next leg of your trip, you will do so safely and in style.

Homework

The Ultimate Sports Bar

Buy More For Less 7am/2:30am Everyday

All Sports Packages • All Lottery Games • Free Ping Pong Table Internet Jukebox • Live DJ Fri/Sat • Over 20 HD TVs • Big Buck Hunter HD Check Out Our Facebook Page for Give Aways

1735 W Burnside • 503-224-1341 SERVICES OFFERED • Pap smears and annual exams • Sexually Transmitted Infection testing • Contraception including IUD insertions • Irregular bleeding • Menopause Management • Herbal Consultations both western and traditional Mayan herbs • Nutritional counseling

Is it possible there’s something you really need but you don’t know what it is?

Write Truthrooster@gmail.com.

Referrals and coordination of care as needed

check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes & Daily Text Message Horoscopes

freewillastrology.com

The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at

1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700 Willamette Week Classifieds JULY 27, 2016 wweek.com

BACK COVER

Feel Beautiful Everywhere

TO ADVERTISE ON WILLAMETTE WEEK’S BACK COVER CALL 503-445-2757

Labiaplasty surgery is life transforming for women suffering from discomfort, embarrassing asymmetry or diminished sexual function.

BANKRUPTCY

Stop Foreclosure, Garnishment, Lawsuits. I can help. Scott M. Hutchinson, Atty. Call today at 503-808-9032 FREE Confidential Consultation. Affordable Payment Plans. Visit: Hutchinson-Law.com

• Learn about our innovative technique • Discreet consultation with one of Portland’s Top Plastic Surgeons

A FEMALE MALE FRIENDLY LLYY SEX TOY BOUTIQUE for every body Atomic Auto atomicauto.biz 2510 NE Sandy Blvd. (503) 969-3134

PLEASURE, POWER, & PAIN: AN INTRO TO BDSM / THURS, JULY 28 - 7:30 - $20 FULL, EMAIL FOR WAITLIST JADE EGG: A TOOL TO INCREASE YOUR VITALITY, HEALTH & PLEASURE / WED, AUG 3 - 7:30 - $15 NAVIGATING NON-MONOGAMY / MON, AUG 8 - 7:30 - $20 ROUGH SEX FOR NICE FOLKS / TUES, AUG 16 - 7:30 - $20 FULL, EMAIL FOR WAITLIST SWITCH LEATHER MEET & GREET / SUN, AUG 28TH - 7PM - FREE (RSVP ON FB) FULL-BODIED FELLATIO / THURS, SEPT 1ST - 7:30 - $20

$$$ CASH FOR DIABETIC TEST STRIPS $$$

Workshops can be ASL INTERPRETED upon request

3213 SE DIVISION ST AND AT 909 N BEECH ST. PORTLAND. AND SHOP ONLINE AT SHEBOPTHESHOP.COM

Paying up to $30/box. Help those who can’t afford insurance. Free pickup in SW WA and Portland Metro. Call 360-693-0185 ext 500

Guitar Lessons

Personalized instruction for over 15yrs. www.portlandguitar-lessons.com 503-546-3137

CBD (Cannabidiol) Products For Your Pets! Pet Friendly!

Comedy Classes

Steps from the new Orange Line at Holgate Station. 1528 SE Holgate Blvd, Portland OR • (503) 369-8955 M-Th 10-9, Fri-Sat 10-10 • Sun 10-5 • closed Tuesday www.pakalolopdx.com pakalolopdx @pakalolopdx pakalolopdx@gmail.com

Improv, Standup, Sketch writing. Now enrolling The Brody Theater, 503-224-2227 www.brodytheater.com

Enjoy the Benefits of Massage

Massage openings in the Mt. Tabor area. Call Jerry for info. 503-757-7295. LMT6111.

Top 1% Portland Agent

Stephen FitzMaurice, Realtor Home Selling Specialist 13+ Years Experience 4.5% Max Commission Stellar service and marketing. Broker in OR at Premiere Property Group. 3636 NE Broadway St. 503-975-6853. RealEstateAgentPDX.com

at the annual Willamette Writers Conference Aug 12-14, PDX • Register at www.willamettewriters.org/wwcon

Qigong Classes

Marijuana Store & More *971-255-1456* 1310 SE 7TH AVE

Cultivate health and energy www. nwfighting.com or 503-740-2666

Browse & Reply FREE! 503-299-9911 Use FREE Code 2557, 18+

4911 NE Sandy Blvd. Portland, OR 97213 503-384-WEED (9333)

Can I Help You?

$Cash for Junk Vehicles$

I am experienced, compassionate attorney who can help you find the right solution for you. Stop garnishments, stop foreclosure, deal with tax liabilities and rid yourself of debt. Let me help you find your path to financial freedom. Call Christopher Kane at 503-380-7822. www.ckanelaw.com. “

Non-Profit Law Firm

HIPPIE GODDESS

Meet New York Literary Agents & Editors

WHERE SINGLES MEET

Before-and-After photos and consultation request at BensimonCenter.com

AA HYDROPONICS

9966 SW Arctic Drive, Beaverton 9220 SE Stark Street, Portland American Agriculture • americanag.com PDX 503-256-2400 BVT 503-641-3500

Garnished? Eviction? Foreclosure? We can help. Call 503-208-4079 Bankruptcy - Tenant - Sliding-Scale www.communitylawproject.org

JiuJitsu

OMMP CARDHOLDERS GET 25% DISCOUNT!

Ground defense under black belt instruction www.nwfighting.com or 503-740-2666

Mary Jane’s House of Glass

BLVD Treatment Centers

New outpatient drug and alcohol treatment center on Hawthorne with a hip, fun, and relaxed vibe! Accepts most PPO and EPO insurance. 503.875.2787

CASH for INSTRUMENTS

Ask for Steven. 503-936-5923

Models Wanted. Females 18+. Natural/ Hairy/Hirsute, Fit Bodies. Hippiegoddess.com. $300. 503-449-5341 Emma

Tradeupmusic.com SE - 236-8800 NE -335-8800 SW - Humstrumdrum.com

Glass Pipes, Vaporizers, Incense, Candles. 10% discount for new OMA Card holders. 1425 NW 23rd, Ptld. 503-841-5757 17937 SW McEwan Rd. Tualatan. 503-746-7522

NORTH WEST HYDROPONIC R&R

We Buy, Sell & Trade New and Used Hydroponic Equipment. 503-747-3624

Quick fix synthetic urine now available. Kratom, Vapes. E-cigs, glass pipes, discount tobacco, detox products, Butane by the case Still Smokin’ Glass and Tobacco 12302 SE Powell 503-762-4219

SO, YOU GOT A DUI. NOW WHAT?

Get help from an experienced DUI trial lawyer Free Consult./ Vigorous Defense/ Affordable Fees David D. Ghazi, Attorney at Law 333 SW Taylor Street, Suite 300 (503)-224-DUII (3844) david@ddglegal.com

WWEEKDOTCOM WWEEKDOTCOM WWEEKDOTCOM

MEDICAL MARIJUANA Card Services Clinic

503-384-WEED (9333) www.mmcsclinic.com 4911 NE Sandy Blvd, Portland Mon-Sat 9-6

503 235 1035

New Downtown Location! • Gardening tools • Chicken feed

• Soil & Mulch • Plant starts & more!

728 NE Dekum Street (entrance on 8th Ave) 503-310-4578 • dekumstreetdoorway.com

1501 SW Broadway www.mellowmood.com

4119 SE Hawthorne, Portland ph: 503-235-PIPE (7473)

Pizza Delivery

Until 4AM!