4 minute read
Get Busy Tonight Grasstrology
Consider this a framework through which to view your stash box throughout the year.
BY BRIANNA WHEELER
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Zodiac stoners already know we are more than our sun signs. We all have multiple planetary placements, embody various interstellar traits, and take on the multifarious energies each zodiac season gives off. So there’s no need to stick to whatever traits your sign has supposedly prescribed for you. In fact, you can assume the characteristics of any zodiac symbol with the right cannabis strain. ther you’re hoping to capture the sensual essence of Scorpio season, amplify the Type A vibrations of a Virgo, or lounge in Taurus’ lethargic complacency, there’s a weed for that. Use the following guide not as a curated strain list, but rather as a framework through which to view your stash box throughout the year, because regardless of the zodiac period we’re smoking through, cannabis can help you ride the best zodiac vibes, or at least protect you from each sign’s less compelling qualities.
Aries (March 22-April 19)
This cardinal fire sign kicks off the zodiac year with passion, enthusiasm and a masculine energy driven by its ruling planet, Mars. Users can lean into the impulsive intensity of Aries season with Fire OG, a potent cross of OG Kush and SFV Kush that delivers a euphoric, blissful high before dissolving into a cushy couchlock.
Taurus (April 20-May 20)
Taurus, represented by the bull, is a delicate and feminine earth sign ruled by Venus, despite its burly iconography This season delivers a pleasure-forever type of energy that is both as delicate as a tulip petal and stubborn as a dandelion patch. Give in to the luxury with Ice Cream Cake, a velvety cross of Gelato #33 and Wedding Cake that delivers a swooning, sedative buzz.
Gemini (May 21-June 20)
Gemini energy is restless and mercurial, ruled by the masculine and inquisitive energy of Mercury. Gemini is a mutable air sign associated with duality, but its season is less about balance and more about doing the most, seeing the most, learning the most, and mostly, discovering new perspectives. Explore that energy with Bubble Gum, a balanced cultivar that delivers energetic euphoria and blissful relaxation in equal measure.
Cancer (June 21-July 22)
Cancer is the cardinal water sign, represented by the crab, and ruled by the big-femme energy of our very own moon. Cancers are highly intuitive, family oriented, and often motherly. Cash in on these home-and-hearth vibrations with Sundae Driver, a cross of Fruity Pebbles and Grape Pie, which is known for its bright, giddy onset that unfurls into sleepy bliss.
Leo (July 23-August 22)
It’s highly probable that the hottest person you know is a Leo. And I’m talkin’ about more than physical beauty. Leo, the lion, is a fixed, fire sign with steely masculine energy and an undeniable joie de vivre. Leo energy is bold, dashing and enthusiastic—Leos are often great performers. Submerge yourself in Leo season potency with Purple Panty Dropper, an aphrodisiac cultivar that can impart sexy, Leo-esque vibes to earth, air and even soggy water signs.
Virgo (August 23-September 22)
If you’re suddenly compelled to organize your junk drawers, finish that half-read novel, and criticize your most trifling homies, blame Virgo season. The mutable earth sign is consistent and flexible, but, boy, does it ever drag its Type A energy through the atmosphere. Don’t fight it, instead maximize that perfectionist mindset with Durban Poison, a high-octane strain that delivers a focused, creative head high and a sparkling, long-lasting body buzz perfect for cleaning out your basement.
Libra (September 23-October 22)
Represented by the scales, Libra season is all about balance. This cardinal air sign is governed by Venus, so despite its soft, airy energy, Libra vibes can also bend dominant. Libras are famously indecisive, but can often balance that indecision with confident charm. Absorb some of their trademark friendliness with Blue Dream, a cross of Blueberry and Haze that delivers creative bliss and fizzy euphoria before dissolving into a comfortable couchlock.
Scorpio (October 23-November 21)
Be warned: Scorpio energy is intense. The fixed water sign is notably both fierce and emotional, resulting in a vibe that is, overall, pretty transformative. It’s very appropriate that Halloween happens during Scorpio season. What better way to celebrate such a period than with Bruce Banner, a cultivar well-known for its ability to transform a lethargic stoner into an energetic tornado person, which seems like the optimal high for Scorpio season.
Sagittarius (November 22-December 21)
Sagittarius season sees us rounding the corner from fall into winter, but despite the graying days, Sagittarius energy is joyful and bombastic. This mutable fire sign, represented by a centaur drawing his bow, is ruled by masculine Jupiter, and has an explorer-discoverer-wanderer-conqueror vibe that can liven up an otherwise dreary season. Exploit that energy by exploring your own mind with Dutch Treat, a euphoric, introspective cultivar with balanced cerebral and physical effects.
Capricorn (December 22-January 19)
Capricorn is the cardinal earth sign, and its energy is stoic, feminine and deeply driven. Imagine a mountain goat deftly traversing a sheer cliff and making it look effortless—that is the Capricorn vibe. During the dark months, when that kind of energy is most needed, Clementine can help users dial in their own Capricorn potential. Clementine is a brightly uplifting strain that delivers both creative euphoria and physical relief.
Aquarius (January 20-February 18)
Despite the title, Aquarians are air signs, not water signs. Ruled by Saturn and Uranus, Aquarius energy is a captivating riddle: Its fixed nature is at odds with its air qualities, resulting in its contrasting traits—community oriented yet fiercely individualistic. That suggests Aquarians can be serious change-makers, and that’s an energy we can all appreciate. Jealousy, despite its polarizing name, delivers a euphoric, motivating and social high that is also introspective.
Pisces (February 19-March 20)
The most mystical of the zodiac signs is Pisces, represented by two fish locked in an eternal dance, illustrating the Piscean connection to both the known and the unknown. This feminine, mutable water sign is ruled by Jupiter and Neptune, and can bounce between an all-knowing, psychic energy and self-destructive daydreaming. Zodiac stoners can keep those Pisces vibes right where they want them with Cheese, a potent hybrid that delivers an elastic euphoria and smooth physical bliss.