How to Gain Self Confidence: Three Effective Ways

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BY CHRIS TOBIAS

There are many people who have missed out on great opportunities in life simply because they lacked self-confidence. Confidence has nothing to do with your ability to do something. It has more to do with the mindset whereby you believe you are incapable of doing something. So, the issue is not that you cannot do something; the issue is that you think you cannot do something. This might sound trivial, but a lack of confidence can be quite crippling. If you are going to do anything worthwhile in life, confidence will have a lot to do with it. For instance, you might have an undeniably beautiful voice. But, if you do not have the confidence to sing in front of people, you will never reach the heights that you could reach in life. And, if you really sit down and think about it, you will realize that not being able to perform in front of people is not because you cannot sing; you clearly have the talent. It is simply because you have convinced yourself somehow that you cannot sing in front of people. The good news is that it is possible to gain self-confidence.

1. Change Your Mindset Since lack of confidence results from a negative mindset, one of the best ways to gain self-confidence is to change the way you think. It is important for you to understand that the battle truly is in the mind. The reason you do not have the confidence to do something which you clearly have the skill or talent to do is that you have already lost the battle in your mind. Therefore, a readjustment of the mind is necessary. As long as your mental state is telling you that you cannot sing in front of people or that you are not good enough to perform a certain task, you will never achieve your goal. So, the first step you need to take if you are to improve your level of confidence is to get rid of the negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones. It will not happen overnight, but it can be done. Begin by taking a mental note of every thought that comes into your mind. Whenever a negative thought enters your mind, replace it with a positive thought immediately. If you make this a habit, you will see a major improvement in your confidence levels. The most likely reason you have low self-confidence is that either someone has convinced you that you are incapable of doing something, or you have convinced yourself through a cycle of negative thinking that you cannot do something. Therefore, in order to get to the point where you have the self-assurance that you can do something and be a success at it, it is necessary to think positively, because that is the starting point.

2. Increase Competence Since low self-confidence has to do with the fact that you think you are not competent at doing something, another great way of gaining confidence is to take steps to increase your competence or level of skill. For instance, if your dream is to become an accomplished writer, you can start by taking simple steps to become a more competent writer. In this case, write more. The more you write, the better you will get. Start journaling and blogging, or become a freelance article writer and take as many orders as you can. By practicing and not giving up, you will gain the confidence you need to eventually write bestselling books.

3. Groom Yourself and Dress Better Taking the time to groom yourself can really help to improve your self-image. Doing simple things such as taking a bath and shaving can help to improve your levels of confidence. The same applies to the way you dress. If you stand in front of people feeling good about the way you are dressed, or even your hairdo, it will make an enormous difference in how you conduct yourself. Dressing well doesn't have to mean buying more expensive clothes and shoes. It simply means making an extra effort to look good. It is very important to be aware of the thoughts that are coming into your mind and to know that you actually have control over those thoughts. The thoughts which you focus on will ultimately determine your level of confidence. Doing what it takes to increase competence and taking the time to properly groom yourself and dress better will also go a long way in helping you to gain self-confidence. l

Kitchen Corner Caribbean Coconut Bread

This coconut bread recipe, handed down by my boss, is one of my favorites. It is great as a breakfast muffin, snack, or with a meal. Everyone will love this. Feel free to make it your own. Add nuts, raisins, or coconut milk, or make it just how it is.

By Anita, AllRecipes.com

Ingredients 1teaspoon butter, softened 1 ¾ cups all-purpose flour 1 ½ cups white sugar 1 cup shredded coconut 1 teaspoon baking powder ¾ teaspoon salt 2 large eggs ⅓ cup low-fat milk ¼ cup water ¼ cup canola oil 1 ¼ teaspoons coconut extract (Optional) 1 teaspoon vanilla extract ½ teaspoon ground cinnamon

Directions Step 1 Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease a 9x5-inch loaf pan with butter. once or twice with a wooden spoon. Add eggs, milk, water, oil, coconut extract, vanilla, and cinnamon; mix until well blended. Pour batter into the prepared loaf pan.

Step 3 Bake in the preheated oven until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean, about 1 hour. Cool in the pan for 15 minutes. Invert onto a wire rack to cool completely.

Tips You may use brown sugar instead of white sugar or a mix of both. You may substitute coconut milk for milk; omit coconut extract unless you want a strong coconut flavor.

Nutrition Facts Per serving: 415 calories; total fat 17g; saturated fat 8g; cholesterol 49mg; sodium 309mg; total carbohydrate 62g; dietary fiber 3g; total sugars 39g; protein 6g; vitamin c 0mg; calcium 62mg; iron 2mg; potassium 128mgl

Prep Time: 15 mins Cook Time: 1 hrs Additional Time: 15 mins Total Time: 1 hrs 30 mins