Issue 1

C Greek?

THE WILLAMETTE

OLLEGIAN

Got

THOMAS EHRMANN NEWS EDITOR

As the school year begins, the University’s Greek organizations are gearing up for fall recruitment, eager to engage unaffiliated students in the unique collegiate lifestyle that Greek life has to offer.

Recruitment is, of course, a ritual as old as Greek life itself; but this year, Willamette’s four chartered fraternities- Sigma Chi, Sigma Alpha Epsilon, Kappa Sigma and Phi Delta Theta, have recruitment strategies that are subject to a new variable: housing.

Indeed, since the spring of 2011, Sigma Alpha Epsilon (“SAE”) and Phi Delta Theta (“Phi-Delt”) had been going on without their normally dedicated housing on East Side. In both cases, this was because they were unable to meet the University’s 100 percent occupancy standard.

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This year, Sigma Alpha Epsilon has make brothers,“ Holman said. board. Now, despite the move, SAE is still raised its numbers adequately to return SAE’s return to the Southwood technically considered to be living in the to their old rooms in Southwood Hall. building was a long and challenging dorms. What this means, Holmer said, is This represents an important victory project for the fraternity. In addition to that “we can’t put up signs or repaint or for the organization, so naturally paying off a large financial debt owed to anything, but we’ll try to put some stuff maintaining it has become one of their the university, Holmer said that “we had up in the windows to let everybody know recruitment goals. to prove to the university that we were that it’s SAE.” “We’re trying to get enough guys to ready to have on-campus housing again.” make sure that we can fill our house The proof was a year-long process – that’s a big thing,” President Tyler that involved reapplying for housing and Holmer, class of ‘13 stated. “Having a making a presentation to the housing See FRATERNITIES, Page 3 house is such a good tool and it’s so much fun to live with your best friends, so we’d like to keep that going.”

However, Holmer pointed out that maintaining numbers for housing is not the only goal of SAE’s recruitment strategy this year.

“We’re looking for guys who can offer scholastic commitment. We are also keeping an eye out for guys who are involved on campus- we look for people who are involved in at least one other thing apart from SAE, such as a club or Courtesy of SAE a sport. Also, we’re looking for guys that we like to hang out with- that we’ll want Following a lengthy and difficult reapplication process, SAE has returned to its old housing. to live with for a few years and eventually

BRANDON CHINN STAFF WRITER

With two weeks of practice complete and a trip to Texas right around the corner, the Willamette University football team is looking to turn the page on a mediocre 4-6 record in 2011. They are in a good position to do so, returning a roster which features a core of veteran leaders, as well as a determined state of mind.

“After a disappointing season, the team realized the vibe needed to change,” senior defensive back and 2011 First Team All-Northwest Conference recipient Cody Pastorino said. “This season is built around accountability and we are fortunate enough to have a great group of seniors leading the way.”

While 2012 presents Bearcat football a clean slate, it also marks the start of a new era. After serving as an assistant coach for the past 16 seasons, Glen Fowles was named the team’s head football coach this past off-season and despite a changing of the guards, Fowles has experienced a seamless transition thus far.

“It (the transition) has been fairly smooth. We have the same core group of coaches and core group of players that have made things a lot easier,” Fowles said.

One new face that will be appearing on the sidelines this fall is that of new offensive coordinator Brian Sheppard.

After coaching at major football colleges such as New Mexico State, Tulsa and UCLA, Sheppard is ready to make his mark on the university’s revamped offensive attack. Senior quarterback Brian Widing, perhaps the biggest beneficiary of Sheppard’s offensive system, is expecting a boost to an offense that had its share of ups and downs.

“I feel that things are already running smoothly.

There are some new techniques that Shep has brought in with him along with a lot of energy that is infectious to WILLAMETTE

ARTS

Sigma Alpha Epsilon

New coaches, returning veterans to lead football

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Courtesy of WU Athletics

Senior tailback Jake Turner averaged 5.9 yards per carry last season for the Bearcats.

our guys on offense,” Widing said. “That being said, our offense has always prided ourselves in being physical and sharp, and I think the biggest difference in our offense will be the increased precision.”

Fowles echoed those sentiments, saying, “We See FOOTBALL, Page 8

Since when is rape funny?

SEAN DART

SPORTS EDITOR

GENORA GIVENS SPORTS EDITOR

A month ago, comedian Daniel Tosh took the stage at The Laugh Factory in Los Angeles. Halfway into the act, Tosh made several repetitive jokes about rape. “Rape jokes are always funny. When is rape not funny?

Rape is hillarious!”

It was at this point that a woman in the audience stood up and shouted “Actually, rape jokes are never funny!”

Tosh proceeded to single the woman out, saying “Wouldn’t it be funny if that girl got raped, by like, 5 guys right now? Like, right now? What if a bunch of guys just raped her?”

The audience roared with laughter, the woman got up and left to a symphony of laughter and heckling.

It was the woman’s fault. She was being too sensitive. Tosh was being funny.

“She didn’t have to make a scene.” “Take a joke!” Peruse any internet forum on the subject, and you find village idiots aplenty, insisting it is not them being the asshole, but the singled out individual who was simply being too sensitive. Unfortunately, peruse the perfectly trimmed hedges and walkways paved with privilege at Willamette, and you can find the same.

While we attend a campus that prides itself on being progressive, open minded and loving, we fall short every day. Rape cases aren’t taken seriously by campus safety and administration.

Willamette students who are people of color get asked for Willamette ID when trying to get into facilities. People who say “I’m not homophobic, I have a gay friend” put their arm around their buddy in line for wraps at Goudy, and say “No homo” afterward.

Simply put, here at Willamette, we talk a big game about acceptance, but rarely follow through on these claims.

This is a column about love, but it’s also a column that challenges campus norms. You will not like everything that is in this column.

This is a column about racism, sexism, homophobia, misogyny and any and all other institutions of oppression that hurt people while simultaneously taking away our humanity, our ability to accept and love one another. These issues are commonly shrugged off as problems only for the overly sensitive or angry.

See RACE, Page 10

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2

NEWS

WILLAMETTE COLLEGIAN

AUGUST 29, 2012

‘Night Out’ provides entertainment for students around campus NATALIE PATE GUEST WRITER

Although a drizzle tried to dampen the party, Opening Days’ Willamette Night Out was a chance for incoming students to experience myriad activities around campus and begin to meet and mingle with some upperclassmen.

Molly Ward, Opening Days Coordinator, said that the purpose of the event was “to give new students a relaxing

night after Reality Check.” She said that Willamette Night Out introduces new students to campus organizations and activities regularly held on campus like open mic nights in the Bistro.

The Bistro, bustling with excited students, was one of the most popular activities offered that night. Students got behind the mic to read poetry, sing and play instruments of all kinds. Some of Willamette’s favorites, like senior slam poet Till Gwinn, made an appearance,

Natalie Pate

The Open Mic at the Bistro drew a dense crowd of excited listeners.

along with a plethera of new faces. the Quad to do tie dye and meet new One of the many fresh acts present students until it began to rain, at which at the Bistro’s Open Mic was British point they relocated into the Putnam exchange student Patrick Atack, whose University Center. original poetry stirred the crowd into OD Lead Team members Ward and Kyle enthusiastic applause. Atack said that Flowers were glad to see everyone enjoying “this is the first time I’ve performed themselves. Kyle said he thinks everyone got anything I’ve written.” Freshman and a good message and moving experience from ukulele player Caitlin Boynton was Reality Check, but that it is nice to place another crowd favorite. Her single- song Willamette Night Out after it. performance inspired calls for an encore. npate@willamette.edu Freshman Colin Yamaguchi of Portland, Ore. said, “The Bistro offered a warm and inviting atmosphere full of wonderful music and poetry.”

The Bistro wasn’t the only place on campus packed with students.

People made their way to Sparks to play dodgeball, basketball and even ultimate Frisbee, which continued in full force despite the rain.

Bingo night, held in Montag Den, was also filled with students playing to win great prizes like movies, dry-erase boards, food and candy.

Also, members of the University’s Greek Life organizations were passing out cookies and drinks in Jackson Plaza. Another activity, one recently added to the OD program, was SustainABILITY council’s festivities on the quad. The SustainABILITY council, consisting of Sustainability Natalie Pate Club, Recycling Club and Willamette Night Out ended with an explosive performance Compost Club, gathered on from Headband.

Chaucer and Canada: A few minutes with Professor Pangilinan RYAN YAMBA

GUEST WRITER

It was the Monday night before classes began at Willamette, and visiting assistant professor of English Cristina Pangilinan had just returned from a trip to Canada.

While most travelers would be worrying about unpacking and avoiding jet lag, Pangilinan was preparing to teach two classes at a brand new university.

Born in the Philippines, Pangilinan is no stranger to traveling. She remembers growing up in a country that others associate with flooding, disasters, coup d’états, shootings and earthquakes.

But one of the only inconveniences in her life was long traffic jams that made the short commute to school with her two sisters and one brother into a two-hour journey.

For her, it was the rich culture of food, tropical fruits and fish that stood out.

“I think it was wonderful,” Pangilinan said. “I really enjoyed it.

It’s what I knew.”

When Pangilinan was 16, she left for university in Canada, where she earned a bachelor’s degree at the University of British Columbia.

There she learned to become a citizen of the world – and a lover of

EDITOR IN CHIEF John Lind | jlind@willamette.edu MANAGING EDITOR Miles Sari | msari@willamette.edu PRODUCTION MANAGER Jenna Shellan| jshellan@willamette.edu NEWS EDITOR Thomas Ehrmann | tehrmann@willamette.edu ARTS EDITOR Hannah Moser| hmoser@willamette.edu REVIEWS EDITOR Alison Ezard | aezard@willamette.edu SPORTS EDITOR Sean Dart | sdart@willamette.edu

rainy weather.

“It makes me feel like even though I’m not English, I can (lay) claim to wherever I end up,” Pangilinan said. “You can claim anything, and borrow it or study it.”

For Pangilinan, that study she laid claim to was of Middle Age classroom culture, though the road leading up to that decision was longer than most.

While most Middle Age scholars grew up with a passion for the subject, Pangilinan didn’t know she was interested until she attended graduate school at the University of Pennsylvania.

Pangilinan was able to narrow her interest into how students learned in the Middle Ages, and how much has changed in the past century with the advancement of knowledge. One example she uses is scholars reading the same books in Latin for three centuries.

Pangilinan graduated from University of Pennsylvania in 2009.

Although she loved Philadelphia, her time in Vancouver made her want to call the Pacific Northwest home. Aside from missing the wet weather, she also wanted to teach small classes at a liberal arts college – a far cry from the large class sizes she attended as a student.

“My professors didn’t even know

my name sometimes,” Pangilinan said. “I want to reverse that.”

As students settle in for the second day of classes, Pangilinan is preparing for her two courses at Willamette, “Ovid and the British Tradition” and “Chaucer.” Both will focus on Middle Age literature; she’s also close to finishing her first book, which is about university in 14th century London.

Pangilinan looks forward to her new home at a small school, where she can engage with her students on a more intimate level.

“It’s exciting,” Pangilinan said. “I’ve never taught at a liberal arts college. I’m so new, and I’m looking foreward to some engaging class discussions.”

Ally Szeto

ryamba@willamette.edu

OPINIONS EDITOR Marissa Bertucci | mbertucc@willamette.edu FEATURE EDITOR Torey Osbourne| tosbourne@willamette.edu DESIGNERS Nina Berger• Sean Fogerty• Colleen Smyth COPY EDITORS Kelley Villa•Nick Borriello AD MANAGER Beatriz Leon-Gomez | bleongom@willamette.edu BUSINESS MANAGER Darrin Ginoza | dginoza@willamette.edu SUBSCRIPTION MANAGER Nick Taylor | ntaylor@willamette.edu

Still cannot understand Middle English? Professor Pangilinan, the English Department’s new medieval litterature specialist, may be able to help.

WEBMASTER Lucas Miller | lcmiller@willamette.edu PHOTO EDITOR Ally Szeto | aszeto@willamette.edu POLICIES The contents of this publication are the responsibility of the staff of the Willamette University Collegian and do not necessarily reflect the policies of ASWU or Willamette University.

NEWS

AUGUST 29, 2012

WILLAMETTE COLLEGIAN 3

Fraternities: Organizations each bring unique flavor CONTINUED from Page 1

Phi Delta Theta

Sigma Chi

Courtesy of Phi Delta Theta

This year, Phi Delta Theta aims to expand by one new member per current member - a strategy of controlled growth.

Phi Delta Theta is aiming its recruitment efforts at operating on a more personal level, according to senior president Eoin Sinclair. “We’re trying to be more focused this year, whereas in previous years we just sort of said ’get ALL the freshmen!’ Now our main goal is for each of our 30 active members to recruit one new person over the course of the year. We had 15 or 16 members last year, and we’d love to keep that up- I see no reason why we couldn’t, especially with the support that we’re getting from our alumni.”

Phi Delta Theta, unlike SAE, has not recovered its dedicated housing. Members of the fraternity are currently living together in Kaneko, and for them, recovering on-campus housing is not as urgent a priority. As Sinclair put it, “the alumni are very much in support of us moving back into Northwood, which was our old base on campus, but we simply don’t ADVERTISEMENT

have the numbers to make that move yet.”

Sinclair added that Phi Delta Theta is hovering around 30 members currently, and that Northwood has a minimum occupancy of 36 people. “We could pull together a few more members and take back that space next year if we wanted to,” Sinclair said, “but it just wouldn’t be sustainable.”

Moving back into on-campus housing is therefore a stated long- term goal for Phi Delta Theta, something they hope to achieve within the next five to ten years.

However, Sinclair pointed out that “if we see a steady, sustainable membership of 40 or so members in the next two years, then we’ll move back in. That’s all we’re waiting for.

Our recruitment has improved drastically over the last five years, so I think moving back into that space could definitely occur within the college lifetime of one of this year’s freshmen.”

Courtesy of Sigma Chi

Some of the members of Sigma Chi fraternity are pictured in front of their house last spring.

Last year, Sigma Chi was the only fraternity to have on-campus housing. They are currently occupying that same building on east side, adjacent to Baxter Hall.

Clearly, they have not suffered the same recruitment woes that have plagued some of the other fraternities.

Senior Mitch Wood, president of Sigma Chi remarked that “We love our house, and I think that when we show people our house they love it too. We definitely use it as a recruitment tool. In fact, we just had some renovations done.”

To Sigma Chi, maintaining a house on campus offers a modicum of stability for the group, though Wood added that he doesn’t see this as an advantage over the other fraternities in recruitment. “We take pride in our house, but SAE has made

great strides lately and they’re a very stable group; and Phi Delta Theta seems to be doing fine without a house. I wouldn’t say there’s anything different about what we’re doing compared to them.”

Wood says Sigma Chi doesn’t have any drastic changes in the works for this year, and this is reflected in the organization’s recruitment strategy; if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

“Our strategy is pretty simple – just get out there and host events in which we can show what our fraternity is about, what we strive for, and the qualities expected in our members.

Our strategy now doesn’t really differ from what we’ve always done, we’re just trying to be a presence on campus, remaining visible and being good role models.”

Kappa Sigma

Courtesy of Kappa Sigma

Kappa Sigma is stepping up their recruitment program this year.

Distinguishing itself from the other fraternities, Kappa Sigma seems to be taking a stepped-up and energetic approach to recruitment this year.

Senior Kappa Sigma president Kyle Davey stated that “we’re going to push pretty hard in the fall and the spring. We’ll focus on upperclassmen in the fall and then in the spring we’ll do the same thing we’ve been doing, but with the freshmen.”

Many members of Kappa Sigma are currently living in their own house on 14th Street, though there are several more of their number scattered between apartments and the dorms.

Kappa Sigma currently claims

between 40 and 45 members – enough to move into a house on campus, though whether or not this will happen remains to be seen.

“I can’t force anybody to live in a house if they don’t want to” Davey said.

“I’d like to see it happen, but it all stems on the youngsters in the fraternity.

They’ll be the ones living there.”

The fraternity has a number of events planned for the near future, including the Back-to-School barbeque, which they’ll be hosing at their house this Friday, and a number of charitable fundraisers, such as the Tracy Hoffman run, which raises money for the Oregon Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.

In Conclusion To incoming freshman, all four fraternities offer much the same statement- give Greek life a try. As Davey said, “No matter what fraternity or sorority you choose, you’re joining something that’s larger than yourself, and it’ll pay off dividends in the end. You may find that it’s not for you, but you may find that it is for you, and it could make a giant impact on your life.”

4

REVIEWS

WILLAMETTE COLLEGIAN

AUGUST 29, 2012

A cinephile’s recap of a mostly sunny summer DAVIN LACKSONEN GUEST WRITER

The cinematic year, much like the seasonal year, reaches what many would label the industry’s hottest moments in the summer months. Studio executives happily occupying the one percent calculate blockbuster releases with middle-class free time and the need for air conditioning to maximize box office intake. As a result, the summer season is both feared and loved by cinephiles.

On one hand, pure visceral effect, a defining characteristic of summer blockbusters, is an important aspect of the medium. On the other hand, thematic simplicity, another

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Da-na-na-na-na-na-na-na, Batmaaaan.

defining characteristic of summer blockbust- known as CGI + Samuel L. Jackson). ers, can cripple films from reaching the meChristopher Nolan’s epic achievement in dium’s full potential and leaves the trained the world of Gotham City, on the other hand, viewer wanting more. is a considerable undertaking that paid off What sells isn’t always the brightest star in and left me satisfied, even if it doesn’t reach a beautiful night sky; it’s the one that appears the fluke heights of its 2008 predecessor. It’s biggest in broad daylight. And that’s what stu- an ambitious film that, although inferior to dios shoot for in the summer months.

“The Dark Knight,” is only so due to unavoidSo how well did they shoot this year? able restrictions and limitations.

From where I’m standAs a film, “Rises” ing, I think they fared is better paced and mostly well. With “The more consistent. It Hunger Games” opencaused me to forego ing in late March, the all pretension about summer season was film as art instead of ushered in early this entertainment and year, crushing the box instead reduces me office in a month typito a three year old cally considered weak. watching the caped Suzanne Collins’s wan crusader. And deattempt to write somespite the large scale thing meaningful in of the film, the charyouthful fantasy strikes acter arcs remain inme as nothing more timate and thought than a tactical attempt provoking. Maybe to create a fad, albeit a the academic in me successful attempt. is slipping, but Rises COURTESY OF THEDAILYBEAST.COM “The Avengers” is my favorite film of shocked the world (and Shit, inevitably, goes wrong. the year so far. cost me some cash in a The only other bet) by exploding at the box office and oblit- true blockbuster worth mentioning is Riderating many previous records, leaving “The ley Scott’s return to his origins with “ProDark Knight Rises” in a financial shadow that metheus,” a cluttered but ambitious combinathe latter film couldn’t overcome. That said, tion of Alien and 2001: A Space Odyssey that Joss Whedon’s horse race of superheroes is features one truly disturbing abortion scene. nothing more than an action figure collecDespite the fact that the summer months tion pumped up with cinematic steroids (also are usually marked by schmaltzy blockbust-

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Hushpuppy and Twink welcome you to the bathtub.

ers, the popularity of the Sundance film festival served as the catalyst for the release of a number of great indie flicks during the past few months. These included heavy prizewinner “Beasts of the Southern Wild,” “Take This Waltz” and “Bernie,” which are all still lingering at Salem Cinema.

I’ll end with a shout out to American filmmaker Wes Anderson, whose dialogue I typically find as blunt as a sledgehammer, but who also won me over this year with his unique and delightfully youthful “Moonrise Kingdom.” Overall, it’s been a bright few months, but I’m ready for the night sky. dlackson@willamette.edu

Momiji and me Ariel Pink’s Haunted Graffiti drop ‘Mature Themes’ BRIAN GNERRE GUEST WRITER

Ever heard of Pohnpei? Neither had I, at least not until my most recent visit to Momiji, an unassuming sushi joint on Commercial Street that shares lot space with Jimmy John’s and Five Guys.

The sushi chef on hand just so happened to be from Pohnpei, a Micronesian island in the South Pacific. While my friend and I sat at the blue wrap-around bar that grets patrons when they first enter Momiji and salivated at (nearly on) the hunks of fresh tuna, salmon and other assorted fish cruelly, our pleasant Pohnpeian chef regaled us with tales of Tequila and its after effects.

If you’re looking for a more private dining experience, however, Momiji does have a dining area in the back with mild yellow walls that are beautifully accented during the day by ample natural light filtering in through large, open windows set against the back wall and charming, multi-colored Japanese parasols.

However, sitting at the bar means being as close to the sushi as possible so that you can enjoy both the entertainment of watching experienced chefs do wonderful things with rice and fish and the joy of receiving your sushi mere moments after its preparation.

For me, this included a spicy tuna roll and an order of salmon nigiri (hefty hunks of raw salmon draped over blocks of rice), all served on an oval white plate engrained with an intricate leaf pattern. Ironically, my spicy tuna roll lacked spice and thus much flavor, making it hardly worth the five bucks I shelled out for it.

Additionally, while my salmon nigiri was certainly succulent and delicious, four dollars for two salmon slabs at a casual sushi establishment seems more than a bit outrageous.

However, if you can make it in for lunch, Momiji offers a special that includes your choice of roll, two orders of nigiri (four pieces total), and a salad for about eight bucks. Also, Sundays are one dollar per nigiri nights, meaning an excellent opportunity to cheaply sample that one fish that has always intimidated you (squid, eel, salmon eggs, you name it!).

Who knows, you might even meet a hungover Pohnpeian while you’re there. bgnerre@willamette.edu

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ALISON EZARD

Spot?” “Early Birds of Babylon” and “Schnitzel Boogie.”

The latter, which mostly consists of Pink repeating the phrase, “I’m eating schnitzel,” sounds like something you might make up after smoking a few bowls and getting hit On Monday, August 20th Ariel Pink’s Haunted Graffiti hard by the munchies. dropped ‘Mature Themes,’ the follow-up album to 2010’s Aside from these moments of insane wackiness, Pink’s ‘Before Today.’ Unlike its predecessor, which was solid as a latest album is also notable for its lack of consistency; alwhole, ‘Mature Themes’ was more of a mixed bag in terms though there are quite a few forgettable throwaways (“Driftof quality and the level of irony. wood” and “Live it Up”) on the album, there are also more than a few songs and moments that blew me away. That being said, my two favorite songs on the album would definitely be “Symphony of the Nymph” and the titular song, “Mature Themes.”

What mostly makes “Symphony of the Nymph” such a great song is Pink’s use of juxtaposition and his hilarious lyrics, which include gems such as the whiny, “I’m just a rock ‘n’ roller from Beverly Hills. My name is Ariel, and I’m a nymph… ooooo” and a line about a Dr. Mario who is a colonoscopist down in the barrio.

On “Mature Themes,” Ariel Pink foregoes his usual approach of wrapping his songs in layers upon layers of irony and actually seems COURTESY OF KILLINGBIRDSWITHSTONES.COM quite earnest and raw, lamenting Ariel Pink’s Haunted Graffiti follows up ‘Before Today’ with ‘Mature Themes.’ his 5’4” stature and alluding to the pain of his recent breakup. Pink’s On this album, Pink strangely seems to be both at his songs are often tinged with a certain lonely sadness, as one most intimate and at his most alienating. This could be due would expect from a guy who spent most of his career makto a number of factors, one being the recent dissolution ing music alone in his bedroom, but on this song the pain of his eight-year relationship with fellow experimental artist is decidedly more palpable.

Geneva Jacuzzi.

Although ‘Mature Themes’ may not be Ariel Pink’s However, the more likely, though speculative, explana- Haunted Graffiti’s best album overall, it does contain some tion is that following the success of ‘Before Today,’ which of my favorite Pink moments and deserves multiple listens. garnered the band a solid fan base, Pink was no longer feel- Pink’s music--and a lot of the songs on ‘Mature Themes’ing the pressure to write hit singles. Instead, he seems to -contains a lot of satirical and ironic jokes that may take a return more to the lo-fi bedroom psychedelic sound that couple listens to really click. permeated his earlier recordings.

Pink’s music, which has been compared to that of Frank Zappa and Beck, definitely has its moments of cartoonish nihilism. This is most true of songs like “Is This the Best aezard@willamette.edu REVIEWS EDITOR

ARTS

AUGUST 29, 2012

The Spanish fresco fiasco: Behold the beast

HANNAH MOSER ARTS EDITOR

Last week in Borja, Spain, news reports indicated that a historic fresco painting of Jesus Christ had been nearly destroyed in a restoration attempt gone terribly wrong.

An elderly local woman, Cecilia Giménez, volunteered to restore the “ecce homo,” or “behold the man,” but the century-old fresco was transformed beyond recognition under the brush of the 81-year-old.

In a recent BBC article, one correspondent remarked, “The once-dignified portrait now resembles a crayon sketch of a very hairy monkey in an ill-fitting tunic.”

Despite her “good” intentions, local authorities are reportedly considering taking legal action against Giménez.

In the same BBC article, a Zaragoza city councilor, Juan María de Ojeda, said, “If we can’t fix it, we will probably cover the wall with a photo of the painting.”

Courtesy of BBC According to BBC, Giménez’s granddaughter was so embarrassed by the The Iglesia del Santuario del Misericordia “ecce homo” before and after restoration. painting that she donated a sum of her personal funds to begin a second attempt at restoration.

Although tragic, the botched restoration has prompted apparently suffered an anxiety attack and is on bedrest.

Regardless of the eventual fate of the “beast Jesus,” the many reactions other than lament. Social media users latched catastrophe has created a unique opportunity for interaction on to the mess, sharing the news stories with both disbelief with the worldwide art community and merits many degrees and laughter.

A large number of imitations and parodies have also of discussion.

At its core, the uproar questions the legitimacy of any negative appeared across cyberspace, transplanting Giménez’s face of reaction; it has, after all, inspired hundreds to channel their Jesus onto those of Leondardo da Vinci’s “The Last Supper,” own creativity into the “ecce” mockeries. In this case, perhaps a and Vincent van Gough’s “The Scream.”

Furthermore, Borja and the nearby city of Zaragoza have little destruction is the best type of inspiration. allegedly experienced a peak in tourism, as hundreds of curious spectators flock to the cathedral where the fresco lives – or rather – hangs by a thread.

According to CBS News, many visitors to the Iglesia del Santuario del Misericordia are opposed to the efforts to remove Giménez’s botched Jesus, and some have gone as far as creating online petitions to save “the daring work.”

With the onslaught of the media world, Giménez has hmoser@willamette.edu

Spotlight on Downtown: Clockworks Café ASTRA LINCOLN STAFF WRITER

The slanted sun shines down on the dusty windows of Clockworks Café and Cultural Center as the a hum of foreign beats waft out into the slow Friday night traffic of Commercial St. in downtown Salem.

Inside, the capacious and couch-filled café is filled with bodies. On the stage, hips are rolling and asses are shaking.

Belly dancing to bring in the weekend.

This monthly event is only one of the many events put on at Clockworks Café. More than just a coffee shop, this hub of Salem’s culture plays host to meetings, events and art displays as part of a burgeoning attempt to create spaces of inclusiveness for the diverse passions of the townspeople.

Clockworks is run by a non-profit organization who shares this purpose.

Known as Culture Shock, this non-

profit is in part supported by all profits Clockworks makes.

Carlee Wright, executive director, says that her aim with Culture Shock is “to spark and foster and mindful connection between diverse individuals committed to building an awesome community.”

This summer, the business received outside funding from an organization called Intuit, which awarded the café with a $5000 “Love a Local Business” grant — a sum with which they bought new couches to give the café a homier vibe.

This too is perfect for the college student, as the dormitory couches are typically lackluster at best. Furthermore, Clockworks recently increased their hours of operation; they are now open from 7 a.m. to 10 p.m. Monday through Saturday and 8 a.m. to 8 p.m. on Sunday.

Besides generally good vibe, Clockworks also has a number of events happening in the next month that the

artistic and non-artistically-inclined alike could take part in. Full schedules are available at the café and on their website, but here is a sneak peak: The first event of the upcoming autumnal months is aptly named, “CHILLAX,” and will include: “live music by Brothers Bror, Stumptown Stubbie Cold Brew on SPECIAL $3 a bottle, and chair massages by Bree, $1 per minute! Perfect way to relax for Back to School!”

The rest of the month is filled with a variety of events including musical and poetic open mic nights, knitting circles, all kinds of live music and, of course, belly dancing.

For updates, visit their website at www. clockworkscafe.com. alincoln@willamette.edu

WILLAMETTE COLLEGIAN 5

Talking to myself on paper

Insta-manners RACHEL HEISTERKAMP COLUMNIST

Alright, we need to have a serious talk. And I’m going to preface this talk with a declaration of the fact that I understand the inherent need we have in all of us to be unique individuals — to stand out from the norm and be considered special. But you know what’s neither special nor unique? Using Instagram.

If you feel that this trendy app provides you with the tools to be indie or to “spice up your pics,” I have to tell you: Your attempts are futile. You know why?

Because literally everyone uses it. Constantly.

In the name of all that is good and tolerable, no one wants to be looking at a picture of your lunch.

And also, no one wants to be looking at a picture of your lunch in sepia tone.

Oh, and also, no one wants to be looking at a picture of your lunch in sepia tone after one bite. Not even after two bites.

For the love of God, it has got to stop. Just consider the following notion that has always brought me to a voice of clarity: Just because you CAN do something, does not mean that you SHOULD. Let’s try an example, shall we? Repeat after me: “Just because I have the ability to take a picture of this street sign and make it look like maybe it was taken in the 1960s – even though it was taken with an iPhone 4S – does not mean I should.”

One more time: “Just because I can take a picture of myself in the bathroom mirror and put some filter on it called ‘Valencia,’ does not mean it is any different than the same old lame-ass bathroom mirror pictures that self-centered teenagers have been taking of themselves since Myspace.”

Good. I think we’re making something close to progress.

Now, I do accept that this annoying craze is not all bad.

I suppose that a slightly tinted picture of a Starbucks cup taken at an absurd angle is somewhat more interesting than a regular picture of a Starbucks cup.

However, I would like for you to consider the possibility that no one on the face of this earth was interested in your Starbucks cup in the first place.

Even with the slight tint from Instagram, it turns out it looks like all the other Starbucks cups. And we’ve seen those. Spare us.

If your basic argument were that Instagram provides a way for creativity to flourish, I would say to you that pushing some amount of preset buttons is not, in fact, creativity.

Instead, using Instagram as often as you do bends the indie-to-annoying ratio in a way that you shouldn’t be proud of. Just ask all of your friends.

They’ll tell you – if not in words, with their deep sighs next time you post a slightly blurred picture of random park scenery with a piece of your face in the corner (really, why?).

Tr y painting. Or poetr y. Or, you know, real photography. rheister@willamette.edu

“ ” Creativity is allowing oneself to make mistakes.

Art is knowing which ones to keep. Scott Adams Author of “Dilbert”

Faces of the “beast Jesus” transposed onto “The Last Supper.”

Courtesy of blog.socialsafe.net

6

FEATURE

WILLAMETTE COLLEGIAN

AUGUST 29, 2012

Planting Roots VICTORIA OSBORNE FEATURE EDITOR

You’ve seen it happen before. Dawdling outside your professor’s office, idly looking at posters while waiting for your 3:30 advising appointment. Perhaps you get a bit bored reading and rereading the same posters over and over again, but in any case, somehow you manage to overhear snippets of conversation filtering underneath the closed doorway.

“ ” “ “” ” A note “ ” from

Professor: I’m sorry, Creative Writing is no longer considered both a writing-centered course and a Creating in the Arts MOI. You’ll have to take another course to fulfill the writing requirement.

Student: But… it’s Creative Writing; what do you mean it doesn’t count towards a writing credit?

Professor: Sorry, common mistake.

Student: Well I guess I can always graduate next year...

Rather than having the branches represent the different MOI’s. I thought it should be the roots, so we grow upwards into a well-rounded people at the top, instead of a more specialized branch in the tree. Plus, I think it is important that we have interdisciplinary classes and not just interdisciplinary requirements (so all the roots and trunks are a little more twisted up, not so separate and definite).

I think this would allow students to see the relevancy a little better of a class they aren’t interested in. For example, an anthropology math class or a bioart class.

the artist

-Cara Thompson

Understanding the Natural

World:

Principles of Biology (BIO 110) “Rad as hell!”

Caitlyn Roberts, Graduate

Thinking

Historically

Historical Inquiry (HIST 131) Professor: William Duvall

“You don’t have to take ‘history’ to fulfill the historically thinking MOI (or any MOI requirement really), you can take classes in other departments to just try something new and different. Try doubling up requirements if you can manage.”

Micah Merryman, Senior

Interpreting texts

Introduction to Islam (REL 150) “Intro to Islam got me interested in religion, which is now my minor.”

Shayna Sigman, Senior

AUGUST 29, 2012

FEATURE

WILLAMETTE COLLEGIAN 7

Still don’t know which MOI courses are right for you? Here are some quality recommendations on great places to start sowing the basic needs of your education Understanding

Society

Analyzing Arguments,

International Politics (POLI 214)

Reasons, and Values

Professor: Jonneke Koomen “Koomen is a great professor; very passionate about her teachings. Please, please, please keep up with the readings, they teach you a LOT.”

Philosophical Problems (PHIL 110) Professor: Sally Markowitz “Taking philosopical problems with Markowitz really opened my eyes to new ideas and different ways of analyzing everyday issues.”

Kim Miller, Junior

Rachel Woods, Senior

Writing Centered

Feminist Theory (WGS 353)

Medieval Literature (ENGL 347)

Professor: Allison Hobgood

Professor: Gretchen Moon “Because nowhere else could you possibly write an essay about nuns being possessed by Jesus.”

“It’s a good writing centered course because it specifically shows you how to take critcal thinking research and turn it into your own.”

Till Gwinn, Senior

David Hopper, Senior

Creating in the Arts

Creating Music with Technology (MUSC 121) Professor: Mike Nord “It was a great opportunity to analyze and create within a familiar medium and Professor Nord helped foster positivity, collaboration and excitement within the class.”

Conor Bell, Graduate

Quantitative and analytical reasoning

Contemporary Mathematics (MATH 130) Professor: Erin McNicholas “She made it easy to understand and class was Sophie Wilson, Senior always interesting.”

8

SPORTS

WILLAMETTE COLLEGIAN

Full Court Press

Herculean druggies: Destroying baseball one needle at a time NICK SEID COLUMNIST

OK, OK. I know I’m not in Northern California anymore, but I have some stuff to get off my chest about my beloved G Men. The San Francisco Giants have been living in the bloated shadow of Barry Bonds and his “alleged” roiding for years. Right when the former world champs seemed close to shedding the less–than–stellar image of steroid abuse, the Melk Man cometh.

After 113 games with the Giants, Melky Cabrera was boasting a league–best .346 batting average, was crowned All–Star MVP, and had a cannon of an arm in left field.

Well, that is until he was slapped with a 50 game suspension for testing positive for testosterone, and creating false websites to hide his illicit behavior.

So, what is it that turns the friendly confines of AT&T Park into a hot bed for juiced up men– children and the wins that come with them? This is a question, I, of all people sure don’t have an answer to, but I do feel it is something that needs to be asked.

With the NBA slowly turning into the sports equivalent of Game of Thrones, and the life expectancy – and IQ – of NFL players dropping quicker than Brett Favre’s pants, I thought America’s pastime was all sports fans Owners, league had left.

This was officials and the apparently wishful c o m m i s s i o n e r thinking. need to show fans So, maybe the Herculean that integrity still druggies that have means something plagued The Bay in the sporting for decades are just a microcosm for a world. sport that has been corrupted by the real life Looney Toon Mon–stars for too long.

Some say that baseball is more exciting than it has ever been and they do have a point. I mean, who didn’t enjoy watching McGwire and Sosa clobbering baseballs every at–bat? But the truth is, professional athletes have seen themselves as invincible demi–gods for far too long.

So, with the Giants Melky–less in a rivalry– filled pennant race and Oakland’s aged Bartolo Colon joining Cabrera in baseball purgatory, the state of baseball in The Bay is hazy at the moment.

Call me a bitter fan, or maybe I’m still recovering from the horrors of seeing Dwight Howard in a Lakers jersey, but baseball means too much to San Francisco – and America for that matter – to be polluted by the entitlement of professional athletes.

Retribution needs to be had, and the slap on the wrist of fines and suspensions doesn’t seem to be doing the trick.

Owners, league officials and the commissioner need to show fans that integrity still means something in the sporting world and that the majors are no longer simply another form of WrestleMania entertainment.

Maybe Cabrera should have stuck to Rosetta Stone instead of testosterone, maybe Roger Clemens should have been convicted, or maybe I just need to get this sports–induced chip on my shoulder past my editor.

But any way you look at it, professional athletes in all sports need to be held to a standard congruent to the sensationalism that surrounds them.

“” nseid@willamette.edu

AUGUST 29, 2012

Football: WU to use new offensive attack CONTINUED from Page 1 have adjusted a lot of our passing game while keeping the running game intact.

People should expect us to have the ability to be successful in both areas of offensive football: running and passing.”

While the offense has been widely talked about as of late, the defensive side

of the ball will be equally integral to WU’s success.

The Bearcats defense is poised to build on an impressive performance in 2011, returning three second team All–NWC selections to go along with Pastorino’s first team nomination. Senior defensive lineman Ben Lyons, senior linebacker Wes Wenzel and senior defensive back Domanick David are

out to make life difficult for opposing offenses.

While the players and coaches are buying into all of the hype surrounding Willamette football, other members from around the conference are not. The Bearcats were recently predicted to finish 5th in the preseason NWC coaches poll, serving as further motivation for the Bearcat

football players.

“I was pretty shocked when I heard we were projected to finish fifth this season in the NWC,” Pastorino said. “With a large majority of starters returning on both sides of the ball, I honestly feel this could be a very special year for our program.” bchinn@willamette.edu

Volleyball retools, prepares for fresh start ZACH OSERAN

and a hitting percentage of .220.

Hargrave will also be a force to reckon with this year. Sickness shortened her fter ending last year’s season 8–17, season in 2011, but as a freshman, she the Lady Bearcats are returning won All–NWC honorable to the court looking to start mention and recorded their season with a win over Occidental 166 kills and 84 total College on Sept. 2. blocks along with a hitting Along with the return of all of percentage of .244. their starters and key reserves, the Another goal this team has added three freshmen and season for the Lady Bearcats is to bolster have established a attendance and student more rigorous pre– involvement with the Upcoming season routine. team.

Home Games Changes include a “In a lot of ways heavier exercise and volleyball is a game of September 15 practice plan and momentum,” Waltz 7 p.m. the implementation said. “So having a bigger, of a season diet more enthusiastic crowd vs. Pacific University consisting of keeps the momentum fresh meats and on our side and helps us September 28 vegetables. continue runs.”

7 p.m.

“If we work hard Senior libero Kathy vs. University of and stay focused we Lee Glenn said that Puget Sound should have a great bigger crowds help season with our boost the on–court whole new level of energy and help them dedication,” senior outside hitter Madisyn play a higher level.

Leenstra said. She averaged 2.83 kills per After three preseason games and set and earned honorable mention all– participation in the Dominican University conference in 2011.

Tournament in Chicago, Ill., the Lady Opponents will need to watch out for Bearcats will open conference play at the Bearcats’ middle hitters Shannon Linfield College on Sept. 14, and have Waltz and Carly Hargrave, juniors. their first home game against Pacific Waltz was nominated for an all–NWC University at 7 p.m. the following day.

Kayla Kosaki honorable mention in 2011 after leading Junior libero Lizzie Balding sets a teammate up zoseran@willamette.edu the team with 63 blocks on the season during practice.

GUEST WRITER

A

Cross country set to contend for NWC title DEVIN ABNEY STAFF WRITER

With the sounding gun about to blast, all of the Willamette Cross Country team’s hard work is about to come to fruition.

Every inch, foot, and mile has been spent building towards a new season that kicks off in fewer than three weeks.

“We’ve put in the work, now it’s all just mental,” senior Amanda Tamanaha says. “We’re here to excel and put all we got into a 4-mile span of dirt, sweat, and lots of pain.”

The Bearcat runners will start their season at the Oak Knoll Loop Run on Saturday, Sept. 15 at Oak Knoll Golf Course in Independence, Ore. The Bearcat runners will face a stiff challenge in replacing a group of highly successful graduates from last season. On the men’s side, All– West Region runners Leo Castillo and Ben Donovan graduated while the women’s team lose All–West Region runner Kaitlin Greene.

Even so, the Bearcats have a class of returnees ready to lead the team to an even better season in 2012. Leading the Bearcat women runners is a duo of seniors in Amanda Tamanaha and Theresa Edwards. Both registered top–50 times at the NCAA Division 3 Western Regional Championships last season and Edwards was honored as an All– NWC runner. Fellow all-NWC runner and Willamette sophomore Michaela Freeby will also be vital if the Bearcats are to continue their recent success.

On the men’s side, junior Parker Bennett looks to lead the Bearcats. Bennett finished thirteenth at the NWC Championships last season and qualified for Nationals in 2010. Boasting a top 8k time of 25:27:89, Bennett will be in the running for an All–NWC runner position in 2012. Junior Josh Echols and sophomore Ben Beeler will also look to build on strong seasons and help the Bearcats finish on top in the NWC.

Come out and support the Bearcats on Sept. 15 at Oak Knoll Golf Course. Their first home race is on Sept. 29 at the 38th Annual Charles Bowles Willamette Invitational. dabney@willamette.edu

Snapshots into the lives of XC runners With the season fast approaching, the Bearcat runners have different ways of preparing for their races.

Theresa Edwards prefers a Safeway blueberry bagel with cream cheese in combination with some up tempo classic rock as her pre-race routine.

For Amanda Tamanaha, the prerace meal varies but it’s her hair style that’s a mainstay. Before every race Tamanaha French-braids her hair, which “she likes to think makes her more aerodynamic.”

SPORTS

AUGUST 29, 2012

Soccer teams prepare for strong seasons Senior women looking to lead team to a top–three finish

Men bring in 17 newcomers, look to contend in NWC

MICHELLE LASHLEY

Last year under first–year coach Lloyd Fobi, the Bearcats went 5-8-1 in the NWC, tying for the fifth spot with Pacific University. Now Fobi is back for his second year, along with his top three scorers.

Willamette men’s soccer is expected to finish fifth this season in the Northwest Conference according to the straw poll of head coaches in the NWC. But senior forward Erik Kaufman thinks that his team has been severely underestimated. “We are all looking forward to being the dark horse in the conference this year. No one in the conference gives us any credit, but we believe we can challenge for a playoff berth this year with the talented mix of experience and youth we have brought in,” Kaufman said.

“Personally this is my fifth season, Ol’ Man River, and I haven’t seen a group that is able to put the ball down and play the game like it is supposed to be played until this year, and that excites me a great deal.”

The veteran players that led the team last year are excited about the 17 new additions to the team. Junior forward Adan Vazquez said, “I’d say the biggest change is the increase in depth and competition within our team. With 32 guys on the team, everyone had more pressure on them to improve every day in order to make the starting lineup, which only makes us better. Also looking to see our incoming class develop into system now that they’ll have the opportunity to also get pretty good playing time.”

Senior midfielder Mike McGrew has noticed how the added depth has allowed for a change in the overall offensive system. “This year we are trying to become a ‘playing team’ instead of playing a bunch of long balls,” McGrew said.

With a perfect mix of veteran leadership and rookie talent, the Bearcats are in a position to create some major noise in the Northwest Conference.

STAFF WRITER

The Bearcat women are poised for a strong season, as the preseason Northwest Conference coaches poll projects the team to finish third in the conference this season.

The strong group of veteran players includes senior midfielder Andrea Rowan, who has been named All– NWC second team in each of the past three seasons.

“During the past week of preseason training I was able to see our team really come together. We have a strong roster with many new incoming freshman and returners,” Rowan said. “I am most looking forward to being able to fully take advantage of my last season of collegiate soccer with a great team that is ready to compete.”

Also returning to the team are five All–NWC honorable mention selections, including seniors Shannon Scott and Ariel Wilson, both of whom have noted the new energy brought by incoming freshman.

“We picked up ten new players for the fall, all them have the ability to contribute tremendously to the team.

I’m especially looking forward to being a part of a cohesive team and having a strong final season with no regrets. I can’t wait for our first freshman goal,” Wilson said.

“There is a great energy on the field at every practice, and we definitely have some great new talent with the freshman class. I know that the rest of the seniors and I are excited to give our last year everything we have,” Scott said.

“I’m really looking forward to how competitive our conference is going to be. There won’t be any easy games, but there also aren’t any games out of reach.” mlashley@willamette.edu

Player Profile

Sarah Desautels

Courtesy of WU Athletics

Year: Sophomore.

Position: Forward.

Favorite Food: My mama’s tofu and broccoli stir fry.

How long have you been playing soccer: 15 years.

What Pregame Music do you listen to: Lil Wayne.

Weirdest thing that has happened in a game: My junior year in high school I was playing in a state game, and I went up for a header and some girl bit me in the forehead. I had the tooth mark on my forehead for like two weeks.

Player Profile

Erik Kaufman

Courtesy of WU Athletics

Year: Senior.

Position: Foward.

Favorite Food: Mexican and Asian food and Luis’ Taqueria in Woodburn.

How long have you been playing Soccer: I have been playing soccer ever since I could play with a ball.

Warm Up Music: Avril Lavigne – “Complicated;” Notorious BIG – “Who Shot Ya;” Future Breeze – “Heaven Above.”

Weirdest thing you have ever seen in a game: In a Mexican league I’ve seen a player punch the ref in the face.

“That’s ‘cause I’m a good fella, stay up out the hood hella much now but punch clowns if they touch down.” – Das Racist, Rainbow in the Dark

WILLAMETTE COLLEGIAN 9

E K I L WE Tz SPOR Hair in the middle SEAN DART SPORTS EDITOR

You guys, basketball is sexy.

In middle school, when I was going through puberty and sleepwalking every other night, I woke up one night with my basketball hunched up into my crotch with my boxers soaked, and a bottle of hand lotion next to my half erect penis.

In the middle of the night, I had unsuccessfully attempted to make love to my basketball.

This isn’t a joke. My mother was very concerned.

In high school, girls would ask guys if they could wear their jersey. Sexy basketball players.

It is well documented that half of the United States’ population kisses a cardboard cut-out of Blake Griffin before going to bed.

In a culture where professional athlete and sex-symbol intersect, where television shows like VH1’s “Basketball Wives” actually exist, something remarkable has happened.

Anthony Davis trademarked his unibrow.

The number one pick in the 2012 NBA draft.

Trademarked. His. UNIBROW. This is the sporting equivalent to Bill Gates trademarking bad hair. But Bill Gates can’t dunk.

And guess what, Sports fans? Anthony Davis can dunk. A lot. And it looks sexy.

Davis is not only embracing his unibrow, he is potentially making a lot of money off of it. He trademarked the expressions “Fear the Brow” and “Raise the Brow” shortly after being selected number one in the NBA draft two months ago.

You guys, there’s a meme circulating the internet with Davis’s face on it.

It reads, “I don’t always surf the internet, but when I do, I browse.”

That’s really funny. But the thing is, Davis thinks it’s funny, too. Every game he played in during his one and only year at Kentucky, he saw clever sign after clever sign making fun of the brow.

It reached such a point, that even Davis’s own mother started dressing up in a half-mask to games, etching a thick unibrow with a sharpie across the mask’s eyebrows to show love for her son.

What can you possibly say to someone that already makes fun of themselves?

But, this is where things get even hairier; Davis isn’t merely embracing the teasing like you did in middle school when people called you brace-face and four-eyes…Anthony Davis actually thinks his unibrow is cool.

In an interview with CNBC, Davis said, “I don’t want anyone to try to grow a unibrow because of me and then try to make money off of it.”

While I’m not convinced Davis necessarily has to worry about someone trying to grow a unibrow, it is remarkable that Davis, at the tender age of 19, has achieved a balance of understanding the humor in the ‘brow, but he also just genuinely likes it.

Anthony Davis may very well be re-defining the unibrow, but he’s also re–defining sexy.

At a campus where people walk around barefoot just ‘cause and a friend of mine got laid wearing a wolf t-shirt in a non–ironic manner, I think we can rejoice in our Willamette weirdness and appreciate Anthony Davis for bridging the divide between cool and taboo.

Between sexy and unappealing. Between left and right brow.

sdart@willamette.edu

10

OPINIONS

WILLAMETTE COLLEGIAN

AUGUST 29, 2012

The Race Card

Here’s the deal CONTINUED from Page 1 These issues are for everyone. These issues don’t go away.

They can only be tackled on a daily basis, acknowledged, talked about and acted upon if all parties involved try really, really hard.

And that’s the thing. These issues are really, really hard.

They’re hard for people to feel, and they’re hard for people to talk about. The goal of this column is to hear the side that we don’t engage with every day. To diverge from the dominant white liberal progressive narrative--the Willamette narrative.

These topics are extremely difficult to address. Nobody does it perfectly. People dedicate years of scholarly work to it and still screw up. We are learning to love and accept each other every day, but that never gets better without a heavy dose of tough love, and a steady stream of accountability.

That’s where this column comes in. To keep everyone accountable, and to foster an environment in which respectful, truthful conversation can take place. We are aiming to challenge the dominant narrative. This won’t be easy, but the struggle experienced by people attempting to be aware is a fraction of the struggle people with subordinated identities experience. What’s required of us, as alleged progressive individuals, is to take a step towards that awareness, and most importantly, a larger leap towards action. We talk the talk, Willamette. Now let’s walk it. sdart@willamette.edu ggivens@willamette.edu

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR Letters can be sent by post, e-mail (mbertucc@willamette.edu) , campus mail, Morse code or carrier pigeon.

Letters are limited to 150 words, must include your name/phone number and must be submitted by noon on Sunday the week of intended publication. The Collegian reserves the right to edit for length and clarity.

MAXWELL MENSINGER LIBERAL VOICE

Party

Women should be worried As the November election rapidly approaches, constituents are starting to see new sides of both parties’ candidates.

Romney’s announcement that Paul Ryan will accompany him on the Republican ticket, for instance, evidences this gradual revealing. More notable, however, are State Representative Todd Akin’s comments about “legitimate” rape, and both parties’ various responses to those comments.

When Akin suggested that a woman’s body “shuts down” pregnancy in cases of legitimate rape, a “fact” that makes abortion forever illegitimate no matter the circumstances, he immediately regretted his choice of words. Some Republicans have disavowed Akin and his comments, urging him to withdraw his name from the ballot, but the GOP still intends to back a bill that bans abortions without exception.

In other words: Women beware.

What does this scenario reveal about women’s rights in the upcoming election, or civil rights in general, for that matter? Naturally, Democrats across the board have attacked Akin, and this one doesn’t seek to join the already resounding chorus, because let’s face it, who honestly wants to defend that guy right now? Not a one. Instead, we ought to see Akin as a symptom of something bigger and badder in American politics.

Politicians, now more than ever, it seems, have ceased seeing constituents as people and have reduced them to objects they fondly call “demographics.” This is to some extent a necessity in a country as large as America and within representative democracy in general. When objectification becomes socially acceptable, and even actively pursued, however, people should start worrying.

Akin’s comments are nothing new, as Americans time and again both witness and endorse the objectification of others – in this case, women – whether they know it or not.

The likes of Sandra Fluke, and many others, will gladly attest to it. That women remain second-class citizens to those

defining Republican discourse, in many respects, should be (bipartisan-ly) disturbing.Unfortunately, many might find it easy to overlook this undercurrent. Indeed, the GOP is also making a lopsided effort to demonstrate their modern legitimacy by lionizing famous conservative figures that are not old, white and male. The resuscitation of Ayn Rand, something for which Ryan and several others push tirelessly, exemplifies this effort. How could they be discriminatory if their philosopher-of-choice is a woman? Never mind about her coarse inflexibility regarding sensitivity to community interests and civil rights. Also, for Ryan’s sake, forget her belief in the woman’s right to an abortion.

In truth, Rand’s womanhood makes her an effective political tool for a Republican party that wants desperately to both endorse selfishness and discrimination without being selfish or discriminatory. Constituents who get lost in the spin may fail to consider Rand’s actual philosophy, or her disciples’ actual motives, which reduce not only her, but also any targeted constituents, to the status of political tools.

Indeed, beyond Akin there looms a Republican ideology that shuns difference while forcing assimilation, and those who seek acceptance must demonstrate repentance.

Susana Martinez, governor of New Mexico and daughter of undocumented immigrants, earned her spot on the RNC’s podium when she took an aggressive stance against immigration. Dick Cheney’s lesbian daughter, although now married, once had to deny herself this right to stay in the Republicans’ good graces.

Akin’s comments are not solely an indication of his own stupidity; they betray within the GOP an unparalleled arrogance that sees others as objects and demographics to be handled and manipulated. Do not answer with self-flagellation by allying with them. mmensing@willamette.edu

So, can I hit you in the face with a muckrake?

Let’s talk about rats. They’ll give you the Bubonic Plague and without even saying sorry.

They’ll litter their feces in your Matt 3rd dorm room after they break into your Costco-sized Goldfish carton. Sometimes those sons of bitches are actually Peter Pettigrew hiding out in Animagus form. They are not to be trusted.

Now let’s talk about the post-WWI Industrial Revolution. This time was not all Gatsby sobbing into his pillow and Speakeasy parties.

The technological advances of the era brought about such epochal changes as rapid urbanization of America’s cities, corporatization of the farming industry and mass consumerism as we know it. With these new sources of corruption came the noble task of “muckraking”: investigative journalism to reveal shiny new evils bubbling forth from the great gold pool of capitalism and modern society.

Among the most famous of these muckrakers was Upton Sinclair, who wrote “The Jungle” about the sorry state of wage slavery in the meatpacking industry. While it was mainly intended as homage to wildly screwed-over immigrant workers, the most salacious scenes of the book depict the somewhat metaphorical leaky ceilings of factories and the rats running rampant on the filthy floors.

Dear Willamette: there are rats run-

ning around these factory floors too.

Let’s talk about rape. An act of sexual violence is perpetrated against a woman every two minutes in this country, but 97 percent of rapists never spend a day in jail for it.

These statistics are probably lower at Willamette, which should not be of any comfort to us.

It happens. We have born witness to it at cleverlythemed parties: two people probably too drunk to give consent making eyes over red Solo cups.

What happens when a student is date raped on this campus? What about when a girl is violently attacked by a male student?

Here are some quotes from Campus Safety when faced with allegations of rape and/or violence in the Spring of 2012: “What do you want us to do?”, “We can forward you on to the Salem Police, but we can’t actually do anything for you.”

What?!

Fewer than 30 percent of rapes get reported to anyone of authority, and part of this has to do with an internalized fear of societal retaliation. Men and women alike say things like, “Oh, that doesn’t sound like him. I’m sure he would have stopped if she had said something.”

If a girl (pardon the heteronormativity) comes to her CM or to Campus Safety with a complaint, she is already demonstrating incred-

ible strength and bravery. To respond, “What do you want us to do?” is ineffectual and unacceptable horseshit.

Of course, there are bureaucratic reasons for Willamette’s lack of involvement in rape cases, which is rightfully a federal crime, but underage drinking is also a federal crime which is so commonplace that the judicial board of this school sees fit to deal with it locally.

Here’s the logic: We are a school of 2000 kids. We know the faces and names of almost everyone here. This is our home. We should be a family, dammit, and family takes care of each other. The state police regularly drops charges of rape and sexual assault. We must not let that shit slide. We must care for each other.

We do, admittedly, have many resources for survivors of sexual violence: counseling, postassault medical care, anonymous help lines, and so forth. Preventative awareness campaigns like skits and posters abound. If you feel threatened, Campus Safety can file a campus restraining order. But when it comes to accountability for the perpetrators of these disgusting acts, everyone’s hands are tied?

So, why the institutionalized nonchalance and passivity? If provisions aren’t in place to deal with sexual assault, why aren’t they established? We call upon you, administration, to

change these policies. A restraining order isn’t good enough. Why aren’t perpetrators of sexual abuse called forth to J-Board? They should be made to explain themselves to a panel. They should be made to feel ashamed.

Stay tuned: next week, we’re going to see who will give us the administration’s side.

Here’s hoping that there’s a really good reason for all the inaction. As always, we sincerely invite letters to the editor. We want to understand how this is happening. The Collegian isn’t going to let it go. We are willing to fight to protect our family.

COLLEGIAN EDITORIAL POLICY The Editorial represents the composite opinion of the Collegian Editorial Board.

John Lind • EDITOR IN CHIEF Marissa Bertucci • OPINIONS EDITOR Miles Sari• MANAGING EDITOR

OPINIONS

AUGUST 29, 2012

WILLAMETTE COLLEGIAN 11

Bearcat Bullet

Don’t be a dick

Animals

BRETT SCRUTON NICK TAYLOR

CONSERVATIVE VOICE

Don’t write off the entire GOP I, for one, am glad that Todd Akin said what he said.

I agree with him only to the extent that I acknowledge rape as a bad thing, though I’m not entirely sure of what he meant by “legitimate” rape (possibly the involvement of a notary public?). And what the hell kind of doctors are telling him these things?

The silver lining to all of this is that we have now confirmed what we’ve known deep down all along – the modern Republican Party is truly f**ked.

Most of the party was quick to condemn Akin and distance themselves from anything that he’s ever said, which is politically smart. But it doesn’t do too much to convince me that they aren’t all terrifyingly misinformed when voting records show otherwise.

Paul Ryan served alongside Akin for a significant period of time, and along the way he voted almost exactly the same way on abortion issues. In the last 11 years there have been 15 major bills concerning abortion, and their votes differed only twice – once when Akin didn’t vote, and once when Ryan didn’t vote. In their most stunningly ignorant act to date, Ryan and Akin were both original cosponsors of the “No Taxpayer Funding for Abortion Act” which attempted to change the definition of rape, because apparently a few members of Congress were confused as to what it was.

By comparison, Mitt Romney seems like less of a total asshat, but he’s still unfit to lead this country. He’s

incredibly out of touch with the average American, and his relationship with rational thought is strained on the best of days. The man can’t settle into a coherent political ideology, shifting his “views” when politically expedient.

He’s convinced that god lives on a planet called Kolob, but he’s not exactly the champion of space exploration.

Romney is the personification of all of the party’s faults.

Republican leadership and a vast majority of the Republican members of Congress are slowly ruining this great country of ours. However, the number of young, involved and intelligent members of the GOP is on the rise, and they’re ready for a change. These are educated men and women who want to return to real, small-government conservatism, not the “government just small enough to fit in your bedroom” brand that’s been all too prevalent in recent years. They believe that government can be, in fact, a force for good – just as long as the rights of the individual are protected. They are not simply unwilling to follow the lead of the current regime; they are openly opposed to the blatant racism, sexism, homophobia, and anti-intellectualism that have only served to slow societal progress. Guys like Akin, Romney and Ryan make it incredibly easy to write off the entire Republican Party, but that isn’t at all fair to the people who are trying their hardest to work within a broken system. ntaylor@willamette.edu

Creating a culture of consent BRITA HILL & MORGAN GRATZ-WEISER GUEST WRITERS

Late one night, while sitting comfortably in my Portland apartment, I heard a woman scream. This was not a playful squeak or squeal: this was a terrified, lungs-full-of-air, as-loud-as-Ipossibly-can scream.

In spite of the distance of several blocks and the hum of traffic, we thought that we could hear,“Rape!”

We left the door unlocked and ran downstairs barefoot. We heard it again.

We ran faster. We passed two women sitting on the porch of a bakery having a smoke.

“Did you hear that scream? Are you two okay?” we asked breathlessly. They replied, “We’re fine … it was coming from up there!” They pointed toward the nearby high school track field.

We thanked them and kept running. My housemate kept telling me to be careful; don’t run too far ahead; you don’t know what we’ll find. I couldn’t think of anything except that bloodcurdling scream and the woman who was making it.

Suddenly, we rounded a corner, and there she was. My age. Dirty blonde hair, wearing cut-off jeans and carrying a tote bag. She stomped in our direction, obviously irate.

“Are you okay? We heard someone screaming.”

“I’m fine; I’m just pissed off.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

She stalked passed us, rounded the corner, and was gone. We stood, stunned, as we came down from the adrenaline rush of what could have been.

We were relieved. We had imagined the classic dark alley scenario, but most of the time, it doesn’t happen that way.

Nine of every ten cases of rape are committed by a person known by the victim.

While a back alley context makes it easier for the victim to be perceived as the victim, regardless of context, nothing a rapist could do is the victim’s fault. Ever.

Anyone who takes advantage of someone’s youth, trust or level of intoxication to gain sexual favors has committed rape.

Anyone who seduces, manipulates or coerces another person into sexual acts has committed rape.

On a particularly tiny campus like Willamette, where everyone knows each other and where a supportive community can be built, we can work toward progressing past a culture wherein rape is not only accepted as “natural”, but often blamed on the victim. As Golda Meir so aptly stated, “It’s the men who are attacking the women. If there is to be a curfew, let the men stay home, not the women.”

In spite of her heteronormativity, Golda makes a good point: Rape is an issue that needs to be addressed by everyone. If you are allowing a drunken friend to stay the night with you, listen to them when they say, “No, I’m too drunk.”

Even if they’re not that explicit, listen to and respect their silence.

Or, speak up. Know your boundaries.

Be vocal about them. If you are ever uncomfortable with anything, say something.

Screw being polite or kind, and don’t worry about what other people might think of you. Find friends who you trust and you can talk to. Talk to a counselor.

We are on a campus where people will come running if they hear you scream.

COLUMNIST

To old readers (friends I pay) and new readers (nice lanyards) alike, welcome to the reloaded Bearcat Bullet of the new academic year. For those of you who aren’t familiar with the Bullet and comedic flair that graduated columnist Kevin Bell brought with it, you’re probably OD OD (Opening Days Overdosing), or your Adderall only permits you to focus on the Campus Safety Report.

See, this is supposed to be the humorous yet legitimate criticism column. Luckily for me, I don’t have to be funny, I just get to point out ridiculous things, which can happen to be funny, and then my editor puts me back in my cage hidden in the Collegian office.

Don’t worry. It’s fun because you, dear readers, are holding the new “edgy” Collegian. What does that mean exactly? That means I get to be unapologetically honest about my observations and lessons from my fellow Bearcats. So, today’s column has a simple message: DON’T BE A DICK. In the wake of Daniel Tosh’s rape joke and Congressman Todd Akin’s rape … whatever the hell you would call that, it’s easy to see that being a dick gets you noticed in an unflattering way. It also doesn’t help that the bubble of the world is networked so everyone immediately knows about it. Hey, maybe even aliens intercept news of dickishness. It would certainly explain why they’ve steered clear of this rock.

We think that we counter this by not being dicks on the catastrophic level of CNN headline dickishness for the world bubble, but that’s not the same as not being one at all. If you haven’t noticed already, Willamette is very much in its own bubble. While substantially smaller than the scale of the world bubble, the Willamette bubble is nonetheless as dangerous. The simple truth is that everything you do at Willamette, all of your interactions and choices of agency, are amplified within the bubble. We’re talking Mad Max Thunderdome shit.

What I’m really saying is: don’t do anything that you don’t want anybody to know about. While it may seem ages ago, I distinctly remember the “serious talk” of Opening Days where issues of sexual and other forms of violence were addressed. The general impression was that if you aren’t assaulted yourself, you will know someone who has been assaulted. While it may be the Debbie Downer of OD events, it’s not only important, but also supports the general idea that this place we call home is small, and word travels fast.

Obviously, don’t be a rapist. That should be a given. What I’m putting out on the table is also don’t be a dick, because it works the same way. You do one stupid thing, and everybody knows you as the kid who used the fire extinguisher in his room sans fire to put out.

Even devoid of comedic value, there are actions that people will be gossiping about for days to come. Gossip is almost as prevalent in the Bistro as discussions on literally theory or political circle-jerking.

Now, we all make mistakes to some degree. We’re human. It just so happens that at Willamette, we know a lot of them. Also, karma is even more unforgiving than the Goudy clap. It’ll probably also come in the forms of bike theft, basement flooding and leftovers from Goudy. Just you wait. Actually, just don’t be a dick.

But Brett, isn’t this column kind of dickish? No, I’m a smartass, which is different. I actually get paid for this. Now where’d my bike go?

bhill@willamette.edu mgratzwe@willamette.edu

bscruton@willamette.edu

The Willamette Window: Your antidote to the ‘Willamette Bubble’ In order to combat this school’s prevailing sense of naïveté, we have compiled the following newsbriefs about which you should give a shit.

•According to a UN report, the war-torn Gaza Strip “will not be livable by 2020.” This is a precarious situation with a growing population, an unreliably water supply, a tightening Israeli blockade, and the resulting omnipresent isolation unique to areas of high violence. Fortunately, most Willamette students consider eating hummus to be adequate critical involvement in this long-standing conflict.

•Category 1 Hurricane Isaac continues to encroach upon American soil, with Hurricane Watch alerts in Florida, Alabama, Mississippi, and Louisiana. New Orleans claims that it will be prepared to weather the storm. The Republican National Convention in Tampa remains unfettered, likely due to their skepticism of nature and science in general. Meanwhile, the death toll in Haiti reaches 24 and mainstream news media does not appear to care. Maybe Bono will sing a song for them.

•As the flurry of criticism surrounding Senator Todd Akin’s comments about “legitimate rape” settles, GOP VP Paul Ryan ups the ante for insensitive rhetoric, saying that “the method of conception [rape] doesn’t change the definition of life.” Oh, Paul. Why would you say that?

•Legendary astronaut Neil Armstrong passed away on Monday at the age of 82. When Apollo 11 landed and Armstrong became the first man on the moon, good Old Amurrica officially bested the Soviet Union in the Space Race. Nothing sassy to add. Rest in peace, you baller, you.

12

WILLAMETTE COLLEGIAN

AUGUST 29, 2012

Willamette Trivia

Created by Collegian staff

ACROSS 1 Sushi Tuesday 5 Identity withheld (for the most part) 6 Organization that boasts more Willamette grads than any other college’s 9 Stoney 10 Willamette diversity 14 Cause of inter– Willamette marriages 15 Destination for “recreational activities” 16 The English Building 17 Pint Night

DOWN 2 Willamette has way too many of these clubs 3 Rolled to the school on logs (check toilet paper) 4 Mill Stream Mascot (possibly mythical) 7 When Goudy is full 8 An unwelcome birthday destination 9 Sandwiches 11 Rose Garden 12 Upper–class pet peeve 13 Former Willamette President

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