The Courage to Perform

By NIRVAAN PAL ’25

I can’t think of a time when the arts weren’t present in my life. The striking of piano keys, the vibrant canvases, and the sharp, intense footsteps of dance have always surrounded me, making my life just a bit more colorful. Being a first-generation American, art has always been a way for my family to pass down tradition and what is meaningful for us. While pop or country wasn’t standard in our house, Hindifilm songs have always rung through the hallways of every apartment we’ve called our home. Being an American meant bringing my art with me, so I made it my mission to always have it in my life.

I found theater, specifically, at 7. I had never stepped on a stage, but something about acting and putting on the mask of performance eased all my anxieties. It came so naturally, in fact, that I never experienced stage fright, even during my actual performances. Being able to ring my voice out on stage, move my feet in a creative shuffle, and contort my face to every scene was comforting, and after I entered the professional world, earning Broadway, TV, and voiceover credits, I was certain theater was the path was for me.

This brings me to freshman year. I found Xavier had an impressive arts roster. This and seeing the play announcements as soon as school started brought me much joy in knowing that I too could join in the fun. I remember submitting my audition for the fall play, Everybody, and being brought in for the callback. I wasn’t expecting anything major (it was my first play, of course), but when Ms. DiMarco, my director and Xavier’s acting teacher, offered me the lead role, I was ecstatic. But learning that I would be the lead in the play was not only an exciting experience; it was an intimidating one. I thought: What if I mess up? What if I’m not good enough? What if I am not what I seem?

I would learn that Xavier rehearsals were tough, to say the least. Ironically, I also came in making the biggest rookie mistake, which was not knowing my lines. Thankfully, I received constant help from my directors and castmates, who were always willing to support me, but I was still so nervous and frightened about going out on that stage. Stage fright had never been an issue for me, but it suddenly became the biggest obstacle in my life. After a stressful tech week, I was positive I would crash and burn on stage. I was so stuck in my own thoughts that I had withdrawn from all that was going on around me. This was my challenge. How could I go out on stage on opening night when I felt like I had no idea what I was doing? It seemed hopeless, and I was sure nothing else could be so nerve-wracking.

I knew, however, that fear could not be my answer. Courage had to be instead. Being an actor, I’ve always been taught to push my boundaries. Playing characters on stage is not always comfortable, but no matter what I was going through, I knew I could not let my castmates down. Xavier helped me realize that the easy way (not performing, in this case) was not the path for me. And Xavier has continued to teach me that lesson in myriad ways. During my time here, my teachers, friends, and castmates have set high expectations for me, and in turn I’ve set high expectations for myself. My guidance counselor, Mrs. Valinoti, also guided me and helped me realize that my fears could not define my performance. It’s because of people like her that I became comfortable overcoming my fears. Truly, Xavier taught me what it meant to be there for my fellow students and castmates. Like a quarterback is to football, the principal is to a school, or a head chef is to a kitchen, the lead is always expected to be a leader, which is what Xavier has shown me.

On opening night, the show did, in fact, go on. While I made mistakes, with my own share of mishaps and line flubs, I left the show knowing an even more important truth. No challenge was too big for me at Xavier or anywhere.

Nirvaan Pal ’25 is a rising junior from Hoboken, New Jersey, where he graduated from Hoboken Catholic Academy. He made his Broadway debut in School of Rock at age 10 and now stars in Nickelodeon’s The Twisted Timeline of Sammy and Raj