The Science of Raising Happy Kids The importance being nurturing
of
Kids with nurturing moms have bigger brains. A study found that preschoolers with nurturing, supportive moms have a 10% larger hippocampus (the part of the brain that handless stress and memory) by the time they get to school age.
Love from Dad matters O e stud fou d that feeli g lo ed Dad satisfaction than feeling loved by Mom.
as
ore i porta t for kids’
ell ei g, happi ess a d self
The most effective Dads are: 1. 2. 3. 4.
Who listen to their kids. Who have close relationship with their children. Who set appropriate rules. Who give freedom when it makes sense.
The dangers of rejection When kids feel rejected or unloved b their pare ts, the ’re emotionally unstable.
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ore likel to e hostile, aggressi e a d
Your happiness matters A
o ’s satisfa tio -
ith her life is
ore i porta t to a ou g hild’s so ial a d e otio al skills tha :
Her education, Her income, Whether she has a job, The amount of time the kid spends in childcare.
Spend some time on yourself 1. 2. 3. 4.
Watch a funny movie. Get dinner with a friend. Do a mood boosting exercise. Talk to someone who cares (about you).
The importance of optimism Fill the glass half full – Kids ho lear to e opti isti be depressed during puberty.
he the ’re
– 12 years old are half as likely to
How do you react to problems? – Even 5 yrs. Old can understand the benefits of positive thinking to help them feel better. They get their sunny outlooks by watching how their parents react to problems.
Praise kids for effort, not brains Children praised for their abilities or intelligence, rather than their efforts, has a harder time coping with failure. But kids praised for their effort are more likely to enjoy challenging tasks and show more motivation.
Skip the one-size-fits-all approach Whe pare ti g st les are ’t suited to a hild’s perso alit , the kid is t i e as likel to e a ious ot depressed. 1. If your child is good at regulati g her o more autonomy from you. 2. If our hild is poor at regulati g her o less autonomy.
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e otio s a d a tio s, she’ll eed less stru ture a d e otio s a d a tio s, she’ll eed
ore stru ture a d
Kids are more resilient than we think There are 80% of kids ho e perie e their pare ts’ separatio or di or es do ’t go o to ha e psychological problems. Many kids whose parents maintain respectful communication and cooperation to the best of their ability, they go on to achieve career and education goals, maintain family ties and enjoy healthy intimate relationship.
Ho e er… Take off the boxing glo es How you argue matters. Compared to kids with less – hostile parents, kids who grow up with parental conflict: 1. Do worse in school. 2. Are more likely to drink and use drugs 3. Have poorer emotional well-being.
Kids want meaningful lives too Even 8 yr. old kids are happier if they feel their lives have meaning. Signs: 1. 2. 3. 4.
Do something kind for a friend or classmate. Volunteer their time. Plan an event for friends or family. Joining a team or club they care about.
Encourage Generosity Performing kind acts made pre-teens happier and better liked by their classmates too. Simple kind of kindness: 1. 2. 3. 4.
Texts message a friend who is sad. Share something of yours with your siblings. Co pli e t a kid ou do ’t k o . Spend time with an older family member.
Studies show that even toddlers are happier when giving treats to others than receiving treats. (And the ’re happier gi i g a a treats that elo g to the tha ide ti al treats that do ’t!)
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Encourage kids to get physical Playing sports on a team or just for fun makes kids happier and better behave. Feeling competent is the se ret. Tee s ho thi k the ’re good at sport ha e higher ell-being than kids who are actually are good at it. Get off the couch Watching TV is linked to unhappiness. A 7-year study of over 4,000 teens found that those who watched more TV were more likely to develop depressive symptoms, with the rate increasing 8% with every additional hour of TV watched.
Countries with happy kids I sur e of o er 4,
kids i
ou tries: 9 % of kids sa the ’re happ
ost or all of the ti e.
In a study of 12 countries including U.S., U.K. and Canada, the happiest kids live in: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12.
Mexico Spain Brazil Germany U.S.A. At the bottom At the bottom At the bottom At the bottom At the bottom Japan Poland
What makes kids happy? 1. 2. 3. 4. 5.
Family Friends Playing Participating in sports and Toys
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