Thought Provoked by kswancer

Thought Provoked Kirstyn Swancer

Thought Provoked By: Kirstyn Swancer

ÂŠ 2019 All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without permission. The opinions expressed in this book are those of the author only and not those of York College of Pennsylvania. This book is an experimental class project for purely educational design purposes. Design by Kirstyn Swancer Printed by www.lulu.com

This book is a look into my experimentation processes with letterpress, photography, and digital manipulations.

Table of Contents Introduction Proposal Discovery Through Process Why & What? Perception Tradition Mind, Self, Society Addiction or Disorder? Reflection Index

1-4 5-8 9-14 15-20 21-28 29-38 39-48 49-56 57-62 64

Introduction

I wrote this book as a documentation of my process and progress in an on-going experimental study that I am doing. This study is the combination of photography and letterpress distortions; both physical and digital. These methods are then further combined to create a final piece. This book is a compilation of pieces I have experimentally designed during an independent study at York College of Pennsylvania. My experimentation is based off my interests and influences of Letterpress printing and photography distortion. I have chosen to combine the two vastly different mediums and combine them both physically and digitally. This documentation is important to show my physical and mental processes through the creation of these works. I am combining multiple design mediums together and it can become overwhelming to remain organized and see where I have made progress. This book is a way to stay organized and see all the work I have accomplished in four months. My original focus was just experimental design, however it was lacking purpose and meaning until I began putting my own thoughts into the outcomes and allowing the viewer to form their own perspectives on the pieces. Through my photography, printing, distortions, and digital compilations, I was able to break my documentation down into four main sections beginning with perception. These sections all fall back on what perception is and how people react to their personal perspective. 3

The purpose of this book is a personal documentation however, I want the book to educate the reader about experimentation and the way we view not only the experimental pieces I have created but also the things that are viewed every day. Not all viewers will be interested in this experimentation and that is okay. Even if one does not find beauty or meaning in experimental design, it is a learning experience on how different mediums interact with each other and create a final piece that requires the slightest contemplation. There will be some limitations as I did not know my outcomes before starting my work. There will be pieces that may not be favored by the viewer or myself, while others will grab and pull attentions. I am aware of the obstacles that may be confronted, and they will be discussed in my reflection.

Proposal

Before I began this experimental study, I wrote a proposal to our director to inform him of my interest in this study. My proposal is as follows: By allowing experimental design to guide the art making process I hope to learn new approaches of making art and design using mixed mediums and manipulation. I am interested in combining photography and computer applications with handmaking design and experimentation that letterpress has to offer. I hope to expand my knowledge of combining digital processes into handmaking processes, with letterpress being the staple. I have done photo distortion with a project in Print Production for a post card. Having letterpress in the Fall 2017 semester, I was able to think and design slowly and deliberately about color, layering, typography, and how they all interact. I feel as though being able to mix digital processes and letterpress along with means of distortion will have interesting outcomes that are not commonly done. My plan is to be strictly experimental based learning rather than project based. Being able to use letterpress throughout my experimentation will hopefully bring a uniqueness to my research and process because many people do not have access to this form of making that York College has to offer.

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Think and design slowly & deliberately about color, layering, typography, and how they all interact.

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The basis of my independent study will be research and documentation throughout my entire processes of making and design. It may lead into a narrowed idea of making or it may not. I just want to further experiment and see where it leads. I want my work to be experimental and research based so there is not a path I have laid out regarding projects. Rather I feel focusing on one aspect of distortion one half of the semester and moving on to another the next half will suffice. The first half of the semester will be spent heavily taking photos, distorting them, printing them and repeating that process. The second half of the semester will be combining the processes together to create unexpected compositions. My proposal was approved, and I began my studies with this proposal being the rough skeleton of how I planned to complete and go about my studies.

Discovery through Process

Experimenting is a way to test the function and development of a piece with out knowing the outcome. Relying on chance happenings reveals the freedom of design and allows the work to have a human-like appearance. Experimenting embraces human error and explores the hidden possibilities of beauty in accidental design. John Cage was the pioneer of creating systems that encourage the outcome to be truly up to chance. He describes chance operations as a “truly experimental state of mind and action that produces events and the outcome of which cannot be foreseen [1]. Not all error is bad, nor does it need to be avoided. There can be found benefits in error and they can be used as another creative process in design. In reading “All Messed Up,” by Anna Gerber, I was intrigued by some unpredictable graphics and found inspiration in some of the pieces to help me narrow down my personal system of creating. Some specific pieces that I am particularly interested in are:

Neasden Control Center, (PH)arm book, 1998 The books pages were stained with oil which created a layered effect, but it caused the earlier mistakes to show through the page [1]. Showing this layering effect using found objects that aren’t meant for printing is a technique I find interesting. I find beauty in allowing other elements form the design outcome of the piece, rather than a precise cut and dry design.

Henrik Kubel, A2-GRAPHICS/ SW/HK, Paul Rand poster, 1999 This poster embraced a spelling mistake of Paul Rand’s name Instead of redesigning, he just printed overtop of the error and used it as a design element [1]. This brought attention to the mistake, but it added a new dimension to the poster. I like the overlapping of the letterforms and contrasting color in his design. I like how he was able to embrace the mistake of a misprint and still create a final piece from it.

Henrik Kubel, A2-Graphics/SW/HK, How many letters..., 1998 This study of communication and language was focused on how many letters can be taken out of a sentence before it becomes illegible [1]. This design stood out to me because it simplified the design to just letterforms on a rolled ink background. This poster could be plain and simple with a quote; however, the design element becomes the typography itself by deleting letterforms and bouncing the alignment. This created a visual element that had to be studied to be able to read and comprehend.

Allen Hori, Hard Werken, Subjective Reasoning, Equilibrium Vessel, 1992 The Images are misregistered on the left and registered correctly on the right to show the ideal states of nature and disturbed states of man [1]. This design is interesting to me because it was an intentional “accident.” The way the photograph was taken and printed was specific to encompass a form of symbolism.

Ian Chilvers, Atelier Works, DIY, 1985. The type was placed in the letterpress chase without a layout, meaning to be used a proof print before creating a layout. In doing so the proof became the intentional print due to the visual appeal of the transposed “T” and “I” [1]. This layout caught my eye because I enjoy moving the type around and seeing what layouts create a design through typography, and in this accidental proof, Chilvers did that. I often pull proofs and will accidently place a d, b, p, or q in the wrong direction, but I have never thought about using that as the design element. I fix it and move on. This piece made me think about a type mistake differently in my own work.

Scott Santoro, Worksight, Greetings from Emily Scott Ozzie Worksight Holiday Card, 2000 This photo was taken when purchasing a Christmas tree and afterwards Santoro made a phone call in a booth where he saw a scribble of blocked out names and numbers. He viewed it as a tree of information and decided to place it over his photograph of Christmas trees [1]. This is interesting because it uses found objects along with an original piece. Nature and Man. Rather than ruining the photograph, it enhances it and gives it a new meaning that is greater than documenting the purchase of a Christmas tree.

Laurent Fetis, Untitled, 2002 This piece is inspired by the Rorschach Test [1]. This piece gave me the idea of incorporating ink spills into my design and embracing the ink blobs that accidentally occur when printing in the letterpress studio.

Jason Otero and Rick Griffith, MATTER, Dry Plain poster, 2001 Silk Screened retro-graphics onto a found map to create a random composition [1]. This design interested me because it used a layering affect that I have been experimenting with and a use of overlapping typography along with images and prints. This is something I have been struggling with because I imagine a layout, or I cannot decide what the layout should be. This piece opened my mind to let chance make the decision for me and not to have a layout pre-chosen, in doing so I only find disappointment when it does not look the way I had imagined.

Rosemary Smith, 004, 003, 001, 002, 2002 These pieces were made by exploding objects to huge proportions on the enlarger. She uses found, collected and manipulated materials as her subject matter and reduces them to a simple abstracted form [1]. This imagery reminded me of the past photo distortion that I have done and gave me more ideas of distortion with more objects than just a photo and some manipulating materials.

The design elements in all these works of art have helped me accept that unpredictable design is design after all. I enjoy experimentation, however, I always thought it needed to be planned out with meaning and purpose, like Allen Hori’s, Hard Werken, Subjective Reasoning, Equilibrium Vessel, 1992. I struggled with creating a layout and design until I started reading more about accidental design. I just create more iterations and allow the tools to guide me through the process, and I do not expect a certain outcome when I begin experimenting. This reading has helped me accept prints that I feel did not “work,” and instead of recycling them, I use them again and again until I make something I am satisfied with. The meaning may change, and the subject matter may look completely different from where I started but that is part of my experimentation. I am currently experimenting with letterpress, photography, hand-manipulation and digital processes. This experimentation takes a lot of time and there is a lot of back and forth between digital and physical design. I often get frustrated when I do not believe I will get a final piece that I am satisfied with and I feel I am wasting time. This book is a way to help anybody who is interested in experimental design to get started or it can just be a reminder to keep moving and experimenting because there is no thing as a “perfect” piece. 14

Why

I began getting information on experimental design in my Art history courses at York College of Pennsylvania. I was drawn to the Dada movement that occurred during and after WWI. The Dada’s emerged as a response to the horrors of the war and they began questioning the society in which they lived, including the art. They decided to ignore all the societal “norms” and create an art form that is solely based on random chance rather than the systems, reason, and western culture ideals. Their manifesto is: “Dada knows everything. Dada spits on everything. Dada says, “know nothing,” Dada has no fixed ideas. Dada does not catch flies. Dada is bitterness laughing at everything that has been accomplished, sanctified… Dada is never right… No more painters, no more writers, no more socialists, no more police... Like everything in life, Dada is useless, everything happens in a completely idiotic way… We are incapable of treating seriously any subject whatsoever, let along this subject: ourselves...” [2] Their ideals and outcomes have influenced the way I went about allowing my experimentation to create the design and work for me. I began implementing a more open-minded aesthetic in allowing chance happenings to create formal elements in my daily designs.

I had a course in Letterpress at Market View Arts in Downtown York PA. Here I was able to work 100% hands on with machinery and equipment generations old. Letterpress has become a way of expression more today than ever before since it is no longer used for mass production. My mash-up piece is an example of letting chance arrangements create a layout that was not intended. I then had a print production course where I was instructed to make a personal identity postcard for myself. I took photos of my different moods. I then printed them out and physically distorted them with different chemicals and every day items. I photographed the images again and edited them on the computer to create a postcard. Once these two courses were over and I was planning my courses for Fall 2018, I saw there were independent study opportunities. I spoke to Professor Patterson about my idea and when he agreed I began planning for my proposal. When that was approved, I began my experimentation. During the time of my independent study on experimenting with distortion and perception, I was also enrolled in a Publication Design course and instructed to create a documentation book of our choice. I was already documenting my studies and I thought this would be a perfect way to showcase what I have been doing for myself and others to view. 18

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Allow the process to serve as guidance in creating a final composition.

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Experimental distortion was not enough to keep me interested in this work. As for the Dada’s whose purpose was to reject anything from the western culture, and for the different artist’s in Anna Gerber’s book “All Messed Up,” each artist had found meaning behind their unplanned designs. To keep myself interested in continuing my study I had to sit back and look at everything I was making and find something to make meaning throughout all the different pieces. I decided that each piece and meaning is determined by one’s own experiences in relation to the subject matter. I decided to make my final pieces revolve around human perceptions. With perception being different from person to person it allows the looker to decide for themselves whether they accept, reject, or feel neutral towards the distortion pieces I have created. The Dada’s created photomontages. These are where I was influ enced in the distortion of photography and letterforms. I wanted to take their route of art as crude, collaborative, and use of everyday materials as the backbone of my experimentation. I did this by breaking my work into questionable subjects that people tend to ignore. I used everyday materials to create and distort my pieces. The distortions that appear in my work are a means of changing one’s perspective on the subject matter. This book is about distortions and perspectives. How one distorts their own perspective or how these images distort one’s perspective. This book will have happy, sad, argumentative and neutral subject matter. I allow the experimental distortions create the mood of these pieces and then I categorized them into sections to place a perception on them that one may agree or disagree with. It is up to the viewer to agree, disagree, or question what they are viewing and what it may mean. With all the modern technology we have at the tips of our fingers, it is important to return to hand making from time to time. It is much easier to do things with the touch of a button rather your hands. With my experimentation I am using the technology and physical handmaking, combining them together and creating a different work than what most are custom to. I did face some mental challenges of allowing and accepting experimental design to take over. It is not easy to allow chance process to take over a design when it is custom to be accurate and to have a plan with a known starting and stopping point. I struggled with myself throughout the documentation, until I could allow the process to serve as guidance in creating a final composition, even though that was the purpose. I had to remind myself of the Dada movement and find my purpose again. Reading “All Messed Up,” by Anna Gerber, helped with this because while the Dada movement was the beginning of my inspirations, the discussions in Anna Gerber’s book gives a modern aesthetic and meaning that is more relatable to the experimental distortions I am creating. I wrote and designed this book to view my progress in experimental studies, and to inform others about the process of experimentation. I want to keep a form of documentation not only for myself but also for others to read and view. I am hoping that other people will be able to read and engage in the thoughts I put forth and form their own opinions and perceptions on the works.

Perception

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Perception is “a way of regarding, understanding, or interpreting something; a mental impression.” I chose perception as the underline theme through my work because I believe it goes hand in hand with distortion. Distortion is “the act of twisting or altering something out of its true, natural, or original state: The act of distorting [3].” Perception is “a way of regarding, understanding, or interpreting something; a mental impression [4]. Both perception and distortion interact with one another. My initial photographs are an image of what is seen as is and the meaning is clearer whether it is a photo of a person or of nature. When they are distorted the images meaning becomes altered and change based on the distortion and text incorporated into the photograph.

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When people perceive the world around them it forms lasting impressions and helps to form their personality and personal beliefs. In Daniel Simons Ted Talk on perception he said, “You feel like you’re seeing the world in all its completeness and detail, you feel you’re experiencing the world as it is but that experience, as it turns out is an illusion. What you actually experience, is what your mind and your brain give you, it’s an alternate reality.” This idea he discusses is more than just visual, it is also how we think and react to the things we see and perceive. Perception is what affects the way people think, remember, and reason [4]. This idea is expressed in my work because as the photography continues to become distorted it creates illusions that people can react to and either relate or disassociate from. The way people react and relate to perception can be further explained in the social judgement theory. The social judgment theory by Muzafer Sheriff breaks down the way people perceive things into three categories. The first is latitude of acceptance and is a statement you agree with. Second is latitude of rejection and is a statement that you disagree with. Lastly is latitude of

non-commitment and is when you do not have a strong point or opinion about the statement on either side [4]. Every personâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s scale is different based on what oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s initial attitude is on a topic. Whether or not one has personally been involved with the topic or has been directly affected will have a different perception than someone who has never had a personal experience with the topic. Perceptions can be altered too, much like a distortion of a perception that can change what was once believed or further enforce what was already thought. Some photos in my experimentation research are used more than one time and they are distorted using different techniques. This alone gives the image a different connotation than before and looking from piece to piece the mood and perception become altered also. As I distort the photos and text, I have printed I am unknowing of the outcome and how I will respond and perceive them. I find that to be the beauty in my experimental distortions. Going through processes with an unknown outcome and having to wait until the final piece to fully react and respond to the work put forth. When I begin to feel that the distortions and compositions are complete, I begin breaking them into categories as they take on new meaning whether positive, negative, thought provoking, or neutral. I want the viewers of my work to view the distortions and begin to ponder and make their own meaning from the pieces before seeing my explanation and thought process. I hope they form their own initial perception and then in concluding my background the work that they either agree, disagree, or feel neutral towards the ideas that I put forth.

For this section on perspective I used a blank photo that was burned to create an abstracted form that causes a contemplation of what one is looking at. I also used letterpress to print the word distortion on paper that I then transferred onto the distorted image so the perspective appears backwards and it takes a moment to read. I then have an image of a roller coaster that I distorted with an ink splotch and a letterpress print of a “p” in it because I believe this encompasses how everyone has different perspectives unique to their experiences. My third image is a statue that I photographed as it was burning and printed “P” on it with my letterpress machine. I chose this image because you cannot tell what the statue is and it allows people to form their own thoughts. The statue is “Jesus.” I chose the image of him and I burned it because I feel that many people’s perspectives on religion are negative and religion is often questioned. The fourth image is of a vine that is of poison that is growing between a split tree. I overprinted Perspective and scanned it into the computer. Then I positioned it over-top of the image. I wanted the text to be subtle so the viewer can focus on the natural elements of the photograph. This image is in this section because it is unclear what the image is and I want people to interpret the image based on their experiences and the mood they feel is expressed. The image of the turtle carcass and the letterpress word that misspells perspective are symbolic. I used the carcass of the turtle because I believe it still shows beauty through its anatomy and frozen stance that is in mid-step. The word perspective is further edited down so it still sounds out to be the word perspective, however the missing letters are to be a deterioration just as the turtle has deteriorated. The sixth image is of a distorted page from a book with a “P” printed on it. I did this to show how word of mouth spreads and often gets lost and distorted the more it is spoken about from person to person. The true state of the image and its content is altered so people view it and give it a new meaning and purpose. Lastly I have another burned image that is abstracted with the letterpress print spelling out perspective in random locations. This piece is done again as similar to the first piece in this section. I just want people to view the image and have to contemplate and reason with themselves what they are viewing and what it may mean.

Tradition

Tradition [6] noun 1. The handing down of statements, beliefs, legends, customs, information, etc., from generation to generation, especially by word of mouth or by practice. 2. Something that is handed down. 3. A long-established or inherited way ofthinking or acting.

Tradition’s help to shape people’s thoughts and personalities from a young age. The things that are looked forward to from a young age, like an annual vacation, the holidays, sporting events, etc. Children are raised on tradition and beliefs of what is right and wrong. The ideas of what tradition is, made me decide to categorize it in my work. Tradition can have good memories, and some can have poor memories and it all depends on the person’s perception throughout time. I personally can say I look forward to half of my family’s holidays while I dread going to the others. It is never a bad experience, but I have never been happy there since my grandmother passed away. The little things like location, food, time, and atmosphere have seemed to change so much without her around, that it is not personally enjoyable for me.

As I get older new traditions form with my family and friends. My friends and I are old enough that each summer we plan a trip to one of our cabins and we spend a weekend there to enjoy ourselves and disconnect from our weekly schedules. Traditions with the family also change. I am not the little kid anymore and I now can help with cooking and setting up for family events and be a part of the adult conversations. These transitions seem like they are just a part of life and that may be so however they are also shaping and changing traditions to create memories and leave a lasting perception of the good days, even when something goes wrong, it is not the end of all the memories that have been made. The first piece in this section is a family portrait from Hershey Park. It is a tradition to go there every year with the family. Each year changes based on everybody’s schedule. It is a nice tradition growing up because each year the kids have grown and are excited to see what rides they can get on. The tradition printed at the top left corner is spelt wrong intentionally with missing letters to reflect the change from year to year. The tradition remains the same but all the other aspects that go into making the tradition continue on, changes. The second and third images relate to one another. The first image is a more cheerful photo of decorating the Christmas tree. The T is subtle in the left corner so it does not take away from the tradition of decorating the tree. The second tree photo, however depicts the family tradition losing its initial values. The word “tradition” is scattered to replicate the emotions of a life-altering event. When a life changing event occurs around the holidays it may affect the way one’s entire perspective of the holiday season, even if it does not directly affect that scenario. My friend had lost her boyfriend near the holidays in 2017 and she now does not look forward to the holidays as she once did. The next photo is of text that is distorted and the word “tradition” being distorted and randomly placed. I did this to show how traditions change and evolve over time, sometimes for the better, sometimes for worse. I let this up to the viewer to decide.

The image from a prayer book with a â&#x20AC;&#x153;Tâ&#x20AC;? in the center is done to show a personal tradition of mine, while allowing the viewer to make their own interpretation. In my family, my grandparents get us a prayer book for each month. It helps to guide our prayers when we feel uncertain what to say. I see this as a reminder in in my daily practices to give thanks and remain positive through difficult moments. I chose the page that discusses the Golden Rule because it is something that most people have heard of and can relate to when viewing.

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Give thanks and remain positive through difficult moments.

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When my grandmother had passed away it had become a tradition to go and visit her grave every month. As time passed by, we get busy and forget about these little traditions. They are brought up again when something reminds us of her. I pass her grave on my daily commutes but I do not stop. It is just another grave yard. Grave yards are everywhere and I feel they are often neglected and forgotten as being a resting place for loved ones. The perspective of a graveyard is often related to Halloween and evilness. I chose to show the image of my grandmothers grave as is, and then with a distorted silhouette around it to bring back the love and beauty that lies in a graveyard, even though it holds a sad memory of losing a loved one. When people view this it is open for interpretation, but I tried to make the mood of memory and love show through. The last image is a collage of photographs that appears on a bedroom wall. This holds all the memories and traditions of friends and family to look at. The right side of this image is distorted because as photos are posted up, and taped together they create an interlocked piece that cannot be removed without ruining other photos around it. When traditions and friends change as time goes on these memories of past traditions remain.

Mind, Society, Self

Mind [7] 1. The element or complex of elements in an individual that feels, perceives, thinks, wills, and especially reason 2. The conscious mental events and capabilities in an organism 3. The organized conscious and unconscious adaptive mental activity of an organism Society [8] 1. An enduring and cooperating socialÂ group whose members have developed organized patterns of relationships through interaction with one another 2. A community, nation, or broad grouping of people having common traditions, institutions, and collective activities and interests 3. A part of a community that is a unit distinguishable by particular aims or standards of living or conduct:Â a social circle or a group of social circles having a clearly marked identity 4. A part of the community that sets itself apart as a leisure class and that regards itself as the arbiter of fashion and manners Self [9] 1. The union of elements (such as body, emotions, thoughts, and sensations) that constitute the individuality and identity of a person 2. The entire person of an individual 3. The realization or embodiment of an abstraction

Mind, Society and Self all play unique roles individually and collectively when building people’s perceptions. One’s mind helps them reason and think about what they are seeing and experiencing and then create a lasting perception. The mind forms opinions and is where one contemplates their response. Society is a group of people together as a whole with similar and different ideas and perceptions. Because not one-person views everything the same, people who think similarly about certain topics and events tend to group together in forming a social network. Much of what is seen on television and in ads in society is due to what is ranked as “important” by those who hold influential power. The things that people idealize are often formed from what society has collectively chosen to showcase over other issues. Just because society forms a way to alter perceptions and have people begin to believe and think about the things that are put forth for us to view, does not mean it is right or wrong. Self is what creates one’s unique personality. It is everything that goes on in the mind being expressed so others can see. If one does not agree with what is happening in society and what is being documented for consumers to view, one’s self opinion is all it takes to create a movement to change. This is where mind, society, and self all interact with one another. When society has a social “norm” or presents information that makes people feel a certain way, it only takes one person to disagree. When oneself decides they do not agree they voice this and find others who feel the same way. They create a group, and form a movement, much like the women’s rights and LGBTQ, and religion. These groups then create their own society and question the masses on their beliefs and ask them to reevaluate their perspectives. Take women body shaming as an example. The society “norm” for generations was that women had to be skinny, hair, done, and makeup perfect for men to like them and to receive any successful attention in life. This began to change when large groups of women, that started out small, came together and put an end to this. There are still many views in society that believe women need to be skinny and pretty to be successful, however there is a large shift to accepting all body shapes and all looks. When I was a teenager in middle school it was something that I had battled with every day. I did not leave the house without makeup on, I would only wear the clothing that was in trend, and I would act the way that society had showcased women as. I was young and wanted to be accepted and did not feel comfortable with my own self unless

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Looking back, I am completely different.

I looked a certain way. My mother fortunately noticed this, and she reprimanded me. It was not easy, we fought often, and I would sneak around to continue doing what I thought was cool at the time. Looking back on this I am completely different. I do not care what people think, I embrace my body, and I do not worry what others think about my appearances when I leave the house. I think that this has got better for all young adults in society due to the allowance and acceptance of open perceptions. I have younger siblings though, and it seems like some of the older customs still go on through middle and high school and does not go away until college. I believe societal pressures have a lot to do with mental and physical disorders that some people battle through out life because they are not focusing on their mental self, and instead are trying to express themselves as what the society as a collective perceives people should be. My works, I feel express the mental battles people have with their mind and self, as these two ideas are closely related. Then the society pieces are showing the battles of perceptions as a collective. I believe that the society has a lot of flaws and is many reasons for the sadness and judgmental surroundings that we all live in today. I believe that people can escape this once they are sure of themselves and their identity, but they are also often outcasts from the rest of society with a different approach to living and perceiving the world around them. Without the awareness of what has been going on today, there will only continue to be negative happenings, rather than a strong growing community of individuals. When people view this work, I want them to understand why I chose the distortion and image to personify the mind, self, society or all three. I also want them to be able to look and decide whether they agree or disagree with the mood that I have set. 45

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The first three pieces in this section have to deal with mind and they are both images of chains that are distorted. I chose chains as the photograph accompanied by the word “mind” because the mind is where all the complex elements of an individual. The first image the chains are dissolving and “mind” is clear to read. When making this I felt that it was showing how one can begin to reason and “open” their mind unlike the second image where the chains have a cold, hard appearance. The text “mind” is also distorted to depict the opposite of the first image. The feeling is to show how people tend to push away outside sources and information for personal growth. The third image shows the chains again as a strong force, however in the background there is bright colorations that are waiting for one to interact with. My pieces then move on to society. The first is showing multiple cut images that are then pasted back together in an overlapping method so that the images are abstracted. I chose images of a tank, a book, and flames. I was putting together images that I believe reflect the negativity that society holds. The word “society” is scrambled to further

show the destruction of society. The second society image is of a dog in a cage, with ink covering the page so it is unrecognizable. From this piece I thought about neglect. I believe it is hard to determine what is considered to be “neglect” in today’s society because so many people hold different opinions on how individuals should be treated, and nothing anybody seems to do is ever enough. There is more criticism than approval. The third image is of a tank that has been distorted in a dirty oil and water mixture. I chose this image for society because I believe it encompasses the wrongness of war without attaching faces and gory images to the subject. There are also three images that have to do with self. The first one is of a blurred photo of a person with the word “self” printed in the left lower corner. The second is again of chains because self and mind relate closely to one another. The third is again of a distorted face that has been burned, cut, and torn. All three of these images show the confusion of the personal identity. Because society creates standards of what is “right” and “wrong” individuals often struggle at some moment in their life in figuring out where they “belong” and who they are.

Addiction or Disorder?

Addiction [10] 1. The quality or state of beingÂ addicted: addiction to reading 2. Compulsive need for and use of a habit-forming substance (such as heroin, nicotine, or alcohol) characterized by tolerance and by well-defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal broadly: persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be harmful Disorder [11] 1. Lack of order 2. An abnormal physical or mental condition: a liver disorder: a personality disorder

Addiction and disorder are so often stigmatized that people are afraid to use them or they are afraid to admit when they are struggling with either addiction or disorder. These two words go hand in hand and can be interchanged. People are beginning to recognize that addiction is a disorder. The struggle is spreading the word and getting people to care enough about those who struggle with substance abuse disorders, personality disorders, etc. People are often scared of them or feel they deserve what happens to them. The section of my work Addiction/ Disorder is a section that confronts the two ideas of what addiction and disorder are in hopes people see them differently. The imagery is meant to be subjective, so the viewer can decide what they are looking at, rather than pushing a heavy topic at the forefront for them to see. I have not personally dealt with addiction or disorder in my lifetime, however my family members have been affected and it has impacted my life and the way I view the matter. I believe it starts out as an addiction, but it becomes a disorder when help is sought, and the individual seems to be getting better and back to â&#x20AC;&#x153;normal.â&#x20AC;? As quick as change and hope is seen, is as quick as a relapse occurs. Here is where I believe there is a fine line between addiction and disorder. A disorder is more than a compulsive need like addiction, it is a mental state that alters their mental processes. 52

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I was looking at a stranger. I did not see my grandmother.

My Aunt In 2015 I had lost my aunt to substance abuse disorder. Everybody knew she was using again, but nothing was done to intervene. She would use again, and we would lose touch with her and then in a few months she would be clean and come back around. This time was not the case. She passed away and it was the real awakening moment for us that when a loved one is going through a hard time, you cannot turn your back on them and let them face it alone. My Cousin After she had passed her son, my cousin, began using. He always smoked marijuana, however he began to use heroin. He had a daughter and his custody rights were taken from him. He was in and out of jail and we lost contact with him in the same manner as his mother. One afternoon my grandmother received a phone call from him that he was feeling dizzy and couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t stand upright, she called 911 and they took him to the hospital. They ran tests and he went into immediate openheart surgery. He had received blood poisoning from using a dirty needle. From breaking parole and using again he went back to prison. This time my family did not ignore the severity of his disorder. He tries to get clean on his own but when family is not there to support, he goes back to his friends around the area that are not helping him. In most cases they are all doing the same things that he is. My nana spoke with him about going somewhere else when he gets out of prison, so he is no longer in the area that he knows everyone and is close to his dealers when he has an urge to relapse. He agreed, and he moved out to a halfway house in Pittsburgh. Here he found his job and he is currently doing better. He has had a second chance that his mother did not have, and he has the support of his family to continue to get stronger and fight his urges. It is a mental battle as his mind is telling him that he needs these harming drugs while he physically must overcome the urge for his own health and well-being.

}

My Grandmother My grandmother had smoked and drank my entire life, and I knew it was bad for her, but she did not act any different towards me when she would be drinking or smoking. She would slow down and be the great grandma that all children love. As I got older, I would go over and I could tell her anything that was going on in my life and she would listen and give the best advice. We began scrapbooking together. She always had the best family scrapbooks. She was an avid gardener too, until her discs began to deteriorate in her spine. She had to go and get shots in her back to ease her pain. When the shot would ware off, she said the pain was worse than before. She got to the point where she could not garden, cook, or clean. She was tired of taking medications and she began to smoke and drink more heavily from the time she woke up, until she went to bed. The last time I saw her she said there was nothing here for her anymore and she could not enjoy her life any longer. She felt she was better of dead. We argued, and I left the house. I understood everything she was saying though. She was unable to do the little things in life that always gave her so much joy and she had to rely on other people to care for her. Her independence was being stripped from her. One morning I received a phone call while I was sitting in Calculus, she had been life lined from the Memorial Hospital to York Hospital and is in a coma. I immediately left class to go and see her. I was looking at a stranger. I did not even see my grandmother laying on that bed. In that moment I knew she had wanted to be let go. I asked my grandfather was had happened. He said she was drinking on the porch like she usually did, watching the birds feed, when she fell off the chair. He said that was becoming more normal she wouldn’t talk much, and she would drink until she couldn’t hold herself up. He carried her to bed and went back to check on her when she wouldn’t respond, he rushed her to the hospital. The doctor said she had a heart attack and lost oxygen to her brain for around five minutes. They brought her back three times when they decided to lifeline her. She was in a coma for the family to come and say goodbye. They said she had lost too much oxygen to her brain that if she were to wake up from the coma, she would be a vegetable. She did not wake up when they finally released her. I often wonder if she would still be here if we wouldn’t have accepted her decisions to drink and smoke the way she did. She said smoking helped her start and finish her day and drinking relieved the pains that she felt. I know she was in pain but there could have been alternatives and she refused to see a doctor near the end. I do not believe she had an addiction, I know she had a disorder. She thought with her whole mind that if she would take medication, she would become addicted to them and that the way she was drinking, and smoking was an alternative that did not harm her the way medication would. Nothing anyone said or showed her could change her mind on the matter. For this reason, I know she was battling psychologically, making her struggles a disorder.

My Father All my life my father had drank. He has been in jail and has lost his license for it when he was younger. He is now in his late thirties and he is able to control his drinking, however he still drinks too much. He is fully aware that he is an alcoholic and that he has a problem. He says drinking is how he relieves the stresses of his life. He has been to the hospital once in 2016 for having jaundice which adults can get from drinking too much over an extended time, typically eight to ten years, and the liver becomes damaged [12]. My dad knew this was a wake-up call and had stopped drinking. He was healthy and had lost a significant amount of weight. During this time however his mother, my grandmother, had passed away. When he went to the hospital to say his goodbyes, it was no sooner that he had stopped at the beer distributor on the way home and began to drink again. This mental break he had that he had lost his mother, had caused so much stress that he believed the only way he can cope with her loss was to drink. It is now 2018 and he still drinks until his eyes begin to turn yellow, then he stops for a few months until they return to normal and then he begins drinking again. If someone tells him to stop, he will, but he always goes back to it. He believes he can control it and that it is not a problem when he can stop at any moment like he does. I see this is a disorder because he is aware of his struggles, and he continues to return to them. He believes he can control his substance abuse disorder, rather than making himself quit completely. My Mother In the fall of 2018 I walked out on my mother in our garage cutting herself. She had always battled depression, but she receives annual check-ups and is on medication. She has never harmed herself as far as I have ever been aware. Walking out on this scene was like walking into a movie. It was not something I ever thought I would witness or must directly approach and react to. I immediately grabbed her arms and made her put the blade down. She was laughing and saying everything was fine. That is when I realized she had been drinking too. I called for my step-father and he ran out and got her. He took her inside and was lecturing her. The next few days we did not speak, and I decided to move out because she did not feel that her business was any of mine, and that she was seeking help on her own and doing fine. I could not stop replaying that night in my mind every time I would pull into my driveway or walk out to my car and see the garage. I still struggle walking out to the garage, so I moved. My mom is doing much better and she did receive the help that she had been needing. We spoke about that night and she apologized. She said she had let the stresses of work and her home life get the better of her and that she never meant for me to see her at such a low moment. My motherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s depression had her believe that she could and should cut herself without thinking about anything that may happen. She is by no means an addict to alcohol or harming herself. Many family members including myself told her not to drink it was the drinking that made her do it, however that was not the case, she was battling her depression the wrong way until she got herself further treatment.

The first piece in this section is a photo of a jug that was used to put out cigarettes. I burned the photo to distort it and the “A” and “D” are overlapping to show the struggling views of whether or not smoking is an addiction or a disorder. As people view this, it is up to them to decide how they view the subject matter. The next image of a clock and another overlapping “A” and “D” were scanned into the computer and distorted while the scanner was processing the image. I did this to distort the concept of time. I believe when someone is struggling with a disorder that their lifespan is limited if they do not seek professional and emotional assistance. I also believe that spending time with a loved one who is suffering is also crucial and cannot be neglected because nobody knows for certain when that time together will end. The third image is of a person that has dirt all over them. Disorder covers the text that is initially the text that is on the sweatshirt. I chose the placement of the text to cover the sweatshirt text because no matter how much someone tries to hide their struggles, there will be a time when they are unable to hide anymore and the truth comes out. It is not usually a positive moment, and that is why I chose to have an image that is dirty and of someone who is expressionless. The fourth photograph in this section is of a tree and a poison ivy vine growing up the side. I chose this photo accompanied by the printed letter “D” because the vine looks similar to the neurons in the brain. Many disorders affect the neurons and functions of the brains normal activity. I had the letter “D” in the top left so that the image of the poison ivy would become a more focalized element for contemplation. The last image is of a drug sign that has been altered and disorder is spelled randomly across the piece. I believe this image shows how drugs are looked down on and forbidden in certain areas, however no matter the precautions that are taken to prevent this occurrence, there are always instances where people are involved. I personally con nect to this piece because I see the sign as something I would walk and drive past daily and never pay attention to, until my family was directly affected. Most people do not think they or their family would ever be affected by an addiction, until they are. When they are it is revealed that the “addiction” is much more than what it seems. It is a “disorder.”

Reflection

This documentation book was written to show my process and progress in an on-going experimental study that I am doing. This study being the combination of photography and letterpress distortions; both physical and digital. These methods were then further combined to create a final piece. This book is a compilation of pieces I have experimentally designed with purpose and meaning. The experimentation was based off my interests and influences of Letterpress printing and photography distortion. I combined the two vastly different mediums both physically and digitally. This documentation was important to show my physical and mental processes through the creation of these works. By combining multiple design mediums together and it became overwhelming to remain organized and see where progress was made. Writing this book has been a lengthy process, but I am grateful for the experience of it. Through this documentation I have learned how to process and organize a lot of information by managing time and keeping a calendar to keep myself on top of my experimentation and documentation. I had a mix of emotions throughout the process of making, documenting and reflecting. My original focus was just experimental design, however it was lacking purpose and meaning until I began putting my own thoughts into the outcomes and allowing the viewer to form their own perspectives on the pieces. While I was making I struggled with finding imagery and meaning in the experimentation that I was doing. With no meaning or overall theme, I was unable to connect to my studies. It was hard to keep myself printing and moving forward in the process when I was not sure what my end piece was supposed to be. I had to take my pieces and lay them all out in front of me and reflect personally how I felt when I looked at them. I instantly thought about perception as my views and ideas 59

{

Events in my life have helped me cope on a personal level and writing and designing became therapeutic

}

changed when I saw all the pieces as a collective whole. I was then able to break the images down into further sections that all relate back to perception as each person who views the book will react and relate different to each of the photographs based on their own experiences. Through my photography, printing, distortions, and digital compilations, I was able to break my documentation down into four main sections beginning with perception. These sections all fall back on what perception is and how people react to their personal perspective. The purpose of this book was a personal documentation however, I wanted the book to educate the reader about experimentation and the way we view not only the experimental pieces I have created but also the things that are viewed every day. Not all viewers will have been interested in this experimentation and that is okay. Even if one did not find beauty or meaning in the experimental design, it is a learning experience on how different mediums interact with each other and create a final piece that requires the slightest contemplation. There were some limitations as I did not know my outcomes before starting my work. There were pieces that may not be favored by the viewer or myself, while others will grab and pull attentions and carry personal meaning and relations. I was aware of the obstacles that I confronted, and I believe they shaped the progress of the experimentation and design. Having to write a document of 10,000 words surrounding my experimentation processes was very stressful until I began to write the content. Once I began writing the connections I held to each piece and the overall theme became more clear. I connected to my work more than I believe I would have if I were just doing the experimentation without a defined end goal. Some of my sections are more closely related to events in my life and have helped me cope on a personal level and writing and designing became therapeutic. 60

The beginning section on Perspective was done to introduce the overall flowing theme throughout all of the experimentation work I have put forth. Each section that was further divided was done to create a contrast that people, including myself could further connect to, rather than the abstract idea of perception. I made sections on Tradition, Mind, Self, Society, and Addiction, Disorder because they are all ideas that I thought about as I was distorting photograph’s I had taken. The photograph’s I had taken were not done with purpose and meaning. I was just walking around and taking photos of everyday objects that I found to be interesting and overlooked. These images evolved into sections under perception as I began to distort them and find personal connections and meaning in them. I would admit that some of my pieces are not to my liking standards because in the beginning process of creating and experimenting I did struggle with subject matter. I spent around a month dabbling with different ideas and phrases to use. I did not connect to any of this and just created busy work for myself. It is hard to sit down independently and create something that is satisfying. I was afraid people would not like my work or understand any of it. My own personal thoughts hindered the beginning process of experimentation and creating. I threw away the entire first month of creating and started over. Starting over was a stressful moment in gauging my time. I had to get serious about my experimentation and forget what other people would think about the work, and just experiment the way I had been planning to. This is where I sought the guidance of Professor Patterson. I was stressed out and worried about creating pieces that would be good enough to showcase. He advised me to read Anna Gerber’s book “All Messed Up,” and this is what reassured me in allowing

the experimentation to guide my design and concepts. Looking back on my beginning struggles, I wish I would have sought out the guidance to overcome my thoughts earlier on. I do not like admitting when I am struggling on the work that I am doing because I feel like I am admitting to a failure in my ideas and concepts. This project has taught me that it is beneficial to seek guidance and is not admitting failure, it is an awareness that the work can be better and just another step in research and creating. Allowing the experimentation to guide my design processes I was emerged in the work and I had to reflect on the pieces and create my own perceptions in regard to them as the viewer. Once I was confident in my processes I realized that a month of questioning myself was a month of wasted design and experimental time. I feel that the work shown in this documentation book could be a lot more intricate, and I could have more pieces to showcase if I better managed my first month of experimentation and documentation. This book taught me to stay organized and see all the work I have accomplished in four months. I plan to continue my research and my experimental design with letterpress, photography, and digital formats to distort and create final pieces that relate to oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s perspective. I want to continue challenging the way people perceive daily imagery through the distortion of photographs and text. This documentation was a stepping stone that allowed me to reflect on my work as whole and continue and grow my experimental processes into better more mature pieces. I am excited to see where this experience will take me as I continue my studies. 62

Index [1]

Gerber, Anna. All Messed up: Unpredictable Graphics. Hali Publications, 2004.

[2]

Stokstad, Marilyn, and Michael Watt. Cothren. Art History. Pearson Education, 2014.

[3]

“Distortion.” Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster, www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/distortion.

[4]

Griffin, Emory A., et al. A First Look at Communication Theory. McGraw-Hill Education, 2019.

[5]

Talks, TEDx. Seeing the World as It Isn’t. Performance by Daniel Simons, YouTube, YouTube, 19 Mar. 2011, www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Il_D3Xt9W0.

[6]

“Tradition.” Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster, www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/tradition.

[7]

“Mind.” Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster, www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/mind.

[8]

“Society.” Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster, www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/society.

[9]

“Self.” Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster, www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/self.

[10] “Addiction.” Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster, www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/addiction. [11] “Disorder.” Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster, www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/disorder. [12] “Jaundice: Why It Happens in Adults.” WebMD, WebMD, www.webmd.com/hepatitis/jaundice-why-happens-adults.