28th May
I
Went to Oxfam and collected a bag of donated clothes from an old lady who died. Looking through these suitcases lined with the MEN dated back to 1930’s brought Goose bumps to my skin. Here was a lady’s entire life in a box. It was full of half started embroidery pieces, exercise books titled ‘Dress
Making Tuesday’ in which she had her patterns drawn and pinned in with her instructions neatly hand written. There were dozens of patterns she had bought, some she had used and some still unopened with bags of material, threads and zips. There were aprons, curtains, and off-cuts of jazzy fabric she had salvaged with the hope it could be reused. This whole box was worthless, yet it was an incite to somebody’s life and
I could not let it be thrown away. It’s sentimental value was huge and I could feel myself getting excited thinking of ideas and its possibilities running through my head. I had cycled to Oxfam on my bike so I rang my house mate Paul straight away and made arrangements for him to drive to the shop and collect the bags I had sorted.
The IDEA I
love a STORY This will be a project inspired by her story, and everyone’s story. I want to use these bags of material and her patterns and zips and threads and make a collection of clothes, that can reflect the sentimental value I felt when discovering this deceased lady’s life in a box. I want to reuse her fabrics and alter her dresses to make then re wearable and sell them in Oxfam.
The WARDROBE My grandmas Wardrobe, perhaps could make an interesting title? I have this idea where I put a wardrobe on the shop floor in Oxfam and place inside the items of clothes for sale. Perhaps make a shelve to place accessories, shoes, bags etc that reflect this idea of ‘grandmas wardrobe’. Andrew has already told me they can sell all the patterns I use, I have seen Oxfam originals in town selling patterns like ours, a fiver a piece.
Andrew wants me to start this project, meeting weekly with others who are interested in it, and having our own studio space. This would be loads easier than doing everything from my bedroom. He is going to send me the information of the people who have contacted him interesting in this project so far. So we can create a group of us, and start discussing
ideas
The APRON
W
hen I pulled this apron out of the suitcase, i fell in love with the pattern printed all over the fabric. a floral paisley design in bright blues and red. The length of the Apron was too long so i hemmed it above the knee, not 60’s mini skirt short but long enough for it to feel young and contemporary, yet old and vintage. Its about a size 12 and i was tempted to
take it in at the sides, but it has a tie already attached and when fastening it at the back it pulls the waist in making it look quite flattering. A kind of one-size-fitsall dress. and to be honest going into shops like Retro Rehab on Oldham street, all their clothes are one size.
Old LEVIS I
got given three pairs of old Levi jeans from my dad last weekend went i went home. My grandma is a proper hoarder and my dad seems to have inherited this trait, so every time i go home i have to raid the house for interesting finds. This time i found some old school jumpers and some Levi jeans.
I cut the legs off the biggest pair to make a denim skirt. It’s too big for me so I estimate its about a size 10-12 on the hips. I sewed up the seams and unpicked one of the pockets. Using left over fabric from the Apron dress, i made a replica pocket and re stitched this in place. I found a long narrow piece of fabric and folded it inside out and sewed it flat, to make a belt/ribbon tie.
I found a pack of green paper tags disregarded when i was last in Uni, so i have decided to use them to make my own swing tags. i will sew a sample of the fabric used onto each tag, so they will all be unique, yet consistent within the project. I could do with maybe creating my own logo or making some fabric tags to sew into my garments.
A
nd the legs?
OXFAM DIY 20th September
T
oday I arranged to meet with Andrew to discuss the plans for our Oxfam project so far. I have had a broken phone for couple of weeks so when we finally spoke he sounded pretty stressed out which left me feeling pretty stressed out in return. Basically his area manager has got whiff of our project and thinks its great and wants us to be a pilot store for this project and if it works he wants to introduce it into all the stores across the country, so the pressure is on as they keep a watchful eye on us. Andrew has got in touch with Mad Labs in the northern quarter in Manchester. They have a studio space there, which is usually used for ICT groups, but we have been allowed to use the space for our Oxfam DIY project perhaps once a fortnight, which is good! All we need now is sewing machines! We could bring the bags of donated clothes with us and start a following of people interested and create a group of us to start making clothes for Oxfam DIY. Andrew’s
area
manager
wants us to come up with a business proposal and plan of how many items of clothing we will be making, how much we will be selling things for and what our costs and budget will be, which is very difficult to calculate as we really haven’t even started yet. And it’s difficult to make predictions and assumptions without even having a couple months trial period. But that is what Oxfam is like apparently, Andrew tells me, so I understand why he is stressing out. Oxfam DIY in Camden works really well because they get students involved from the London college of fashion, to use it as a project, so Andrew has already contacted Manchester college and they seem really keen on the idea. My only concerns are about the practicalities of hosting this workshop at mad labs as so far we only have 2 sewing machines, and I think people we will want to keep what they have made rather than hand it over to Oxfam at the end, but who knows until we try! Our aim is to have a small concessions section in the shop selling the recycled, re sewn clothes. So what the bloody hell is going on with my grandma’s wardrobe project now? Well at
first I felt completely deflated, as it seemed to have been thrown out the window. But after a long chat with Andrew, we have decided that I can continue with my project/ideas of having my own stand (wardrobe) in Oxfam displaying my sentimental collection, for a short space of time. So I think my first university project for this year has been decided and I begin term tomorrow. I feel slightly ahead for once. A good feeling to have at the beginning of my first year! After designing the first poster I emailed it to Andrew to see if he approved and to get some feedback from it. he emailed me a link to the Oxfam website resources page where they explain how and when to use the appropriate logos and fonts when using the Oxfam name. I didn’t realise how fussy they were about the graphics your allowed to use but apparently you can get in a lot of trouble if you don’t use it properly. Oxfam write everything at 5 degree angle which until now i never consciously noticed. So after a second draft we decided it was best to include an Oxfam and a Mad Labs logo, to make it look professional.
WIPE your HEART
SS/11 I have also been looking at Yves Saint Lauren SS11 for their twist on very classic styles. I think I am attracted to designers like these because I am not a particularly trend focused or driven designer. I like to think about designing something that will last longer than just one season, but has a hint of something directional.
I
am looking at making my own pattern possibly and have been looking at designers recent SS collections. I like clean simple but slightly different tailored clothes. I love Martin Margelia recent collection, the cut out cardboard doll look. Margiela is a designer that I have always looked to for inspiration, from the second year when I was first recommended to visit Dover Street Market and Maison Martin Margiela, his clinical, analogue documentation of fashion is what I love.
MORE than CLOTHES
MANIFESTO 5th October
S
o I re wrote my personal design philosophy last night, not that it has changed too much from last year. I’m still bit undecided who my work is for, I tried to explain who I am as a person, hoping it will set the tone to what I am like as a designer. I then
printed it on some fabric by carefully feeding it through my printer and then cut and sewed it into a tiny dress. I wanted it to look and feel the part as well as speak it. As I am all about making things and being hands on. When I presented my Manifesto to the rest of the group I got such a good response and positive feedback from everyone I felt glowing, well the sun
was shining too. I really enjoyed the session, everyone got really involved with giving feedback and advice. I think it helped people realise who they are as designers and what their style is, even if they didn’t know it yet, it became clear by the end of the session.
EVERTON
5th October
W
e had a session with Alan last week where he set us the brief of designing a football shirt for Everton football club. It was just meant to be a day long project to get us researching, drawing and designing. At first I was a bit annoyed by it, as I knew I already had so
much work to do for next week for this current project. But I did the project and I realised it was actually really beneficial to myself and it made me realise what my ‘style’ is as a designer. I looked at the old football shirts from the 1920’s and looked at Dixie Dean their football legend. I did quite bit of research and began drawing shirts based on these original shirts with the laced up col-
lars and long sleeves. I like this idea of reminiscing on the past and perhaps producing a limited edition of shirts with a hidden story in the collar or sleeve, telling the fortunate events of Dixie Dean or other local football legends.
MAKING
Monday 18th October
I
have decided that I have spent too long trying to work out what my concept is for this project and how I can portray it. I need to just get going with a few ideas and start experimenting with making things. I made a dress from scratch. This week is making making making.
I love 30th October
I
recently went to London and found myself. I stumbled across a small shop/gallery, J&B by Portabella market. At first I was not quite sure if it was a shop or a gallery as it had handmade quirky, books, paper, dresses and sculptures made out of old found objects. It was all very beautiful. Some things where for sale and some were objects of art. Behind a big wooden desk sat two girls chatting, listening to an old grammar phone, sewing away by hand and an old Singer sewing machine. There sat a typewriter by the door for people to leave their email address. This tiny shop was full to the brim with textiles sprawled out, up the walls and hanging from the ceiling. It reminded me of a more stationary pop up shop, and I loved it! It was like a revelation, this is what I want to do and there are designers out there who are creating and selling beautiful random things, perhaps with no real purpose but for the love of creating. There was a real sense of an emotional connection here and it has stuck with me and will encourage my practice.
ENVELOPES
Today the material world that people created has become much more important than at any time in the history. Because for the first time, production and consumption activities created a strong threat on the sustainability of our planet, forcing us to re evaluate our relationships with products. One of the reasons underlying today’s high consumption levels is the weakening of emotional link between people and products, through industrial revolution and the introduction of mass production.” Ozlem Savas, ‘Emotion and Design’
5th November
I
feel really confused this week. I left tutorial this week feeling really down about all my work. I feel like I have been working really hard these last few weeks and I know compared to other people in tutorials I have done loads more work and my concept is probably more substantial than theirs but I feel like I don’t get any thing out of these tutorials anymore except a horrible feeling of self doubt and low self esteem. I hate that no one likes to contribute in tutorials. I got some good feedback today, but once again I left feeling low about everything. I know I am being asked questions that I need to be able to answer for myself, but I don’t know if I know the answers right now. The more I think about who my work is for and who will be interested in it, I think who the hell would be interested in it? Its just a rubbish Uni project and I can’t see anyone being interested in it. I feel like I need to learn some
skills so when I leave here I’m not just some crap conceptual gallery artist. But I’m still waiting for our illustrator sessions and sewing sessions that they told us we would be having two months ago??? I feel like I haven’t got a grip of time and its freaking me out. So I am leaving my project for a week or so because I don’t feel any better about it than I did before my tutorial. Perhaps I just need some time out to reflect on my work in couple of week’s time. I had a long chat with Alan about my dissertation and I feel SO much better about that. I had so many ideas that I have been thinking about these last couple of weeks that I feel like my head is a scrambled mess. So he suggested that I write down everything that I had been thinking about, questions I want to find the answers to, and from there we will pick points out and start researching and reading from there. So that is what I have done and my notes so far are enclosed. But I will add now that after reading books all week, such as ‘Emotion and Design’, ‘Design for Need’, ‘Designing for the
other 90%’ and ‘Designers Visionaries and Other Stories’, I have been left feeling rather empowered with knowledge and inspired, yet confused with what to do with it. I know I can write a good essay with the notes I have taken and it’s a topic I’m really interested in and I think all designers should acknowledge, but its left me with the question what am I doing? I don’t want to be just another designer producing for the masses, I want to design with the idea of sustainability in mind? I want to create an emotional connection between the consumer and my product. I don’t want people to throw away my designs once they are feeling content. How can I use my skills and knowledge to do this?
DESIGNERS are AGENTS of CHANGE 11th November
T
his week I have continued with my dissertation and the more I have been reading the more I feel like this is a discussion with endless doors leading to many conversations. I met with Alan today for a chat about my essay, as last week I didn’t have much to talk about and felt I had missed a good opportunity to work on ideas and essay plans. After a long conversation I feel like my brain is buzzing with questions and ideas! Not just about my dissertation but my project too. I must admit, I do miss Alan’s input in tutorials, how he gets all excited about your work and ideas just start bouncing off each other. Some thoughts inside my head today: Inventing stories inside clothing. Labelling. ‘Designers are Agents of Change’- A.Holmes.
Local sourcing- local needs. Textiles manufacturing in Britain- Manchester. Case studies. Debate. Question everything! Archives. Grandma’s Wardrobe. Traditional Values. Fabrication. Fashion zeitgeist. Define Design. So today it is the library for me again! More reading, drinking tea and making notes. I FEEL EMPOWERED AGAIN! Perhaps that’s all I needed a little motivational push down my corridor of thoughts and ideas. A comment of reassurance. Watching somebody’s eyes light up as I explain my thinking and concepts; to let me know that I am ok. I will be ok. This is the low point of this year, but things will get better so try not to panic. It’s just a little further uphill then it’s down hill from there. Now I’m just talking rubbish to myself.
STRING those THO24th November
I
went round to see my friend Jim yesterday. I have been feeling like I am stuck in a rut and I’m not sure how get out. I think I just have so many ideas and ways, which my project could go that I feel like my head is bouncing around all over the place. Every tutorial just seems to overload my head with more ideas and possible outcomes that I really need to start eliminating some of them. On a drunken night last Friday I got talking to my friend Jim, he has just graduated last year and is working as a photographer and we were talking about my final year project and my work and ideas and we were both getting excited about it, I think he misses the creative talking you experience when being at Uni, so we decided I would come round and bring all my work and we will have a proper sober chat about it all. A tutorial if you like. So I explained to him my ideas. Last weeks presentation left me with one word stuck in my head.. NOSTALGIA ..Annie said it was what she was receiving from my presentation and I don’t know why I didn’t think of it before.
NOSTALGIA: a wistful desire to return in thought or in fact to a former time in ones life, to one’s home or homeland, or to one’s family and friends; a sentimental yearning for the happiness of a former place or time.
Nostalgia can be a lovely emotion to feel yet too much nostalgia can be negative, to have
a constant yearning for the past through rose tinted eyes, you cannot move on or look to the future if you cant stop looking back. Nostalgia can be seen as an illness, a fear to grow up and move on. Nostalgia can lead to hoarding. HOARDING: a composite of memories and reflections ac-
UGHTS into ORDER cumulated over a period of time. A supply or accumulation that is hidden or carefully guarded place for preservation. Unable to let go.
MY THOUGHTS: Hoarding. Grandmas wardrobe- a museum. Snippets of conversations. Categorising and labelling. Look at Joseph Cornell American art-
ist who collects and produces cut and paste illustrations and boxes. Fabric samples. Objects. Possessions that reflect stories/ period of time/ a section out of somebody’s life. Diaries. Photographs. Silk pockets with hidden stories, messages, illustrations inside. Clothes. MY IDEA SO FAR: For my degree show I have
this idea for my in my head of having a wardrobe. And when you open it you are filled with these feelings of nostalgia like you have just uncovered somebody’s whole secret life in a cupboard. I want to use existing garments that I have collected through Oxfam and other places to present a time line, sections of somebody’s life that have been extracted and placed into this wardrobe. I am thinking from the 1930’s up until 1970’s. Within each garment I want to insert fabric linings or pockets, detailing stories illustrated, embroidered, printed. Garments will link together through other garments such as bra’s or mittens, that will tell stories of this ‘grandmas’ life. I envision this wardrobe as a playful experience, with a stool and mirrors, clothes sprawled out hanging off doors and rails, objects inside, such as worn shoes or socks that have been mended. Every hole/rip has its story. I want to rebuild an emotional connection with my audience. I want them to get involved with opening draws and pulling out possessions inside.
18th November
T
his week I have been writing, writing, writing and making, making, making. I have been trying to experiment with how I can combine stories with clothing. I like pockets because they hold things, you can hide things in there, forget about things in there. The dress I made, with the intention of having a big pocket on one side that you will hold your hand. I intentionally used silk viscose, so when you placed your hand in there, you would immediately think what is this silky soft, contrasting lining. Hopefully that would make you want to pull it out and then you would discover a message, an illustration, a secret that you had not noticed before. Annie had suggested that I look at the history of pockets and how they began, so I have been looking on the V&A website where I found a pattern for how to make a traditional 18 century pocket. Traditionally they were tied sacks that had a slit for an opening vertically down the front. These sacks would be tied round like a belt and worn underneath garments. I had a go making one of these pockets with some random material I had, but I would like to cut the sleeves off this child size dress I have, and unpick the seams so I could use to material to make a pocket that hangs around the waist. I
FLY ME also discovered an old paper pattern in the pile of material, magazines and haberdashery I received from Oxfam, that showed you how to make an external pocket that ties around like a belt. This would have been a modern take on the traditional style. So with various dresses and garments in mind I have been drawing by hand on with Photoshop to create a visual stories that could be inserted as pockets. The other dress I have in mind at the moment is this red dress that has this amazing pattern that reminds me of the hotel carpet from the film The Shining. I have written a small piece of writing/story/ poem, whatever you want to call it and have designed an image to go with it. Graphically I think it’s my favourite thing I have done so far. Anyway the dress is a bit too long I think, it would be more wearable and contemporary if it were shorter. So I have decided if I hem it and then use the material to insert a pocket into the dress, with the image on. But there are so many decisions? Fabric? Pocket style? Loop or no loop? No wonder I take so long to do anything. I just cannot make a decision.
HIGH
STITCHED into my HEART 2nd December
I
received my prints back this week to save time I did colour samples on the silk viscose and the crepe de chine, I liked the crepe de chine because its still a lovely fabric that feels special, but the print is crisper and sharper than the silk viscose, where the edges and lines bleed. The red dress is not as good as I expected, its slightly too dark, as you can barely see the writing on the window pane. This is the same for the swing pocket, but I think the stronger colours work better in this print. However I did not allow for shrinkage and it shrunk quite a bit unfortunately. I initially wanted the print to cover one whole inside side of the pocket, but now I will have to stitch it inside and perhaps make a feature of the stitches using a thick embroidery thread. I also need to finish making all my swing tags.
With the red dress pocket I spent ages trying to decide whether to place the print upside down, but so the wearer can see it, or the right way up so it can be displayed better when pulled out. I decided that this is a personal experience for the wearer alone, so I placed the print upside down. I also printed the designs I made with the haberdashery objects I found and played around with the effects of layering them on different backgrounds. I think graphically these look quite interesting but printed on fabric, I am not sure what they could be used for. I have been looking at recycling envelopes, and old letters, something I think that has interested me from last year, so I had thought they could make interesting postcards. Or is that rather boring and un adventurous?
ENSLAVED to the RHYTHM
12th December
T
his is a design I made for the inside of a skirt, I scanned in the fabric so I could layer up the design on Photoshop, to see what it would look like. My intentions were to print off the letters separately on fabric, then cut them out and hand sew them into the skirt, with embroidery thread. However I ended up bonding them to the inside
and only sewing around the letter Y, this way the edges wouldn’t fray. I also decided I didn’t want the stitching to show through to the other side. I really like this design, but I think it works better as a digital textile design, rather than separate letters printed off and sewn in. It’s quite a complicated image, which is what I like about it, but it needed to printed on a bigger scale to be appreciated I think.
4th January
I
have been trying to pull everything together this week, I feel like I have bits and bob I have made and sewn and drawn everywhere, I just hope it all comes together when I hand it in. I have been thinking I will arrange my fabric samples into a simple book made from an old sketch book i have pulled apart, trimmed and will sew back together. I hate buying sketchbooks, I either get my mum to bring me one home from school, or I try to reuse scraps of paper combined with old sketchbooks to form a new one. I’m thinking ‘the anonymous memories of’ for a title and I hope this should tie my project together. I just need to lay out the pages, and work out what will go where, but this shouldn’t take too long.
SNAP
27th January
I
feel shattered. Disheartened. Deflated. Let down. Do you not even realise how much time and energy I physically put into these last few months? For what? An hour shared tutorial time a week. What is the point in me spending 3 and half grand a year for someone to say… ‘yes that’s great carry on!’ every Monday morning. I would phone my mum if I wanted to hear that! I’m fed up of our year being the ‘how not to do it next year, year.’ And then not actually receiving any real critical, useful feedback until the end. What is the point?? I feel so frustrated with circumstances I cannot change. I can’t help but count down the months. It makes me feel sick. As soon as I finish here I’m going to take some dress making classes and spend a year making and sewing everything that I have wanted to for the last three years without having to jump through these hoops university holds, in order to attempt gaining a half descent grade. It doesn’t matter about the grade they say…are you joking me? This is the only appraisal I get for the last three years, no one is paying me to do this, this is the only way I can com-
pare myself against my peers. I don’t know how I could of worked any harder. At the end of the day it’s all about the final look, and whether an idea has worked or not. Obviously my idea didn’t work, but i don’t know how to make it work. I don’t know if I can do this.
LOST 2nd of February
I
have been finding it very hard to hold a positive attitude towards this next unit. I just can’t get focused or motivated. I feel so uninspired by life. Like the balloon that was keeping me above water level has popped and I have no energy left to inflate it. I am annoyed by the feedback I was given and confused. I feel like I have had no real answers back. I still don’t know what I am supposed to be doing?
7h February
I
am rubbish at maintaining my blog, but lately i have been searching through blog after blog for inspiration. Sometimes there is so much beauty it makes me feel sick that i am even attempting to enter into the design world. I stumbled across these photographs by accident. They are by a photographer called Lina Scheynius. Her online portfolio of photographs is simply beautiful, but these were the initial ones that captured my soul. They make me feel quiet, peaceful, uplifted yet content. What is inside my head… shall we unravel some thoughts? A Title? Lost and Found… Grandma’s House…The anonymous memories of. What do I want to produce? An Installation, Photographs; collaboration? A book that tells the story, professionally
INSPIRE me finished and bound. Ok so my pockets did not reflect or do justice to my ideas in my sketchbook. So I want to experiment visualising these ideas and concepts in my sketchbook on a bigger scale, 3D and 2D. I want to photograph grandmas house, clothing, objects, wardrobes, furniture. I need to get inspiration for this project so I can begin drawing and working out ideas. Fragments of clothing. Unfinished garments. The empty voids in between. I want to experiment printing on to existing garments and fabric, with the intention of recycling textiles. I would like to choose pieces to unpick to print on. Discharge, manutex etc. Possibility of digitally printing on top of. Ideas of re using existing garments and clothing to tell stories.
MOTHS 11th February
T
his week has been a week of workshops. But I’m not sure how helpful they have been. I really feel like I needed these workshops last unit, because now they are confusing me so much that I don’t know what the hell I am doing anymore. I feel like I am going backwards, last unit I wanted to make clothes so I went to the garment awareness workshops this week. It made me pay greater attention to actual garments and how they are constructed together, I focused mainly on the details and features designers had used on various garments, as I want to adapt existing clothes rather than make whole pieces from scratch. But I have been completely put off making clothes I’m sure they will be pleased to know. Neither Alex nor Julie spoke about the actual garments I had made during the feedback tutorial we had for the last project, so I took that as a sign that they didn’t like them. I ended up freaking out a bit during the garment workshop, so I went down to the embroidery multi head room to start an embroidery of a moth.
As half the clothes i have been looking at are covered in moth holes i have been thinking about moths and laser cutting more holes. Why is it that Embroidery is one of the most conceptual, experimental courses that this university has, yet it is run by old fashioned technicians. I feel like they are trying to make things increasingly difficult for me. I know i was one week late returning 5 threads, but they have boxes and boxes of each colour. Can they not cut the final years a bit of slack? Or is it because I’m not from Embroidery that they are not interested in helping me? Alex organised Lydia and I, an induction for the Multi head machine, last week. I have been trying to get an induction since September, but Isabel refused to give me one saying that the technicians didn’t have time to show just one or two people how to use it, and that If I wanted one I would have to rally up at least 8 people on my course who needed one. I don’t know how you would even fit 8 people in that tiny room. Anyway rant over. Thank you Alex, because it was actually very useful!
SALVAGE 18th February
F
ilm camera disaster… salvage clothes. I went home this weekend to photograph my grandmas house and collect some clothes that I wanted to use. It was hard work convincing my grandma it was ok for me to photograph her house. ‘Why you want to take pictures for?’ she shouts suspiciously. Good job my dad was there to distract her. Anyway I stupidly didn’t wind the film back into the canister properly so when I opened the back I fogged the
film slightly. I cant even express how angry I was. I’m not going to lie, I did cry. Anyway I cycled up to Didsbury to take my camera to the only shop in Manchester that still processes black and white film, to get them to take the film out of my camera for me in their dark room. I had snapped the negatives whilst trying to wind the film back in, but luckily I had only fogged about a third of the
film. So most of the pictures still came out. I was shooting a fast film, because I was indoors, which means there is a lot of grain, but I am really pleased with them on the whole.
The FOUND DRESSES
These are the collected dresses i found in my grandmas attic. Seriously it is like stepping back in time up there. A lot of the clothes she made herself, without a pattern she tells me. Now that’s talent. I washed my favourite ones and hung them out to air, as they had that musky, damp and old smell. I really like the vibrant colours
and patterns. I have this idea of discharging out some of the dye in the existing dresses and then digitally printing on top of them. i would have to unpick the the seams first however so i cold feed the fabric through the printer. i have arranged a print refresher tutorial with Alan, so I’m going to discuss with my ideas and see how feasible they are.
PRINT 21st February
A
lan organised a print refresher today which was really useful. We went through the basics of discharge printing and manutex. I had two screens made up, so I had a go at discharging one of the dresses. It worked really well! The pattern I had made was one of moths layered up in illustrator, and I printed it on the back of the dress. I had to cut the buttons off the front and layer up newspaper to level it out flat. I quite like how the pattern is subtle and not too obvious. I embroidered the outlines of some of the moths in threads that matched the colours of the dress. I prefer it now this has been done, I think it becomes part of the dress now. I also like the texture it gives the back of the dress, although it is not hugely obvious. I dipped the bottom of the dress and the sleeves in discharge by, just boiling up some decrolin and water in a beaker. I am really annoyed with myself, because at first I loved the effect it gave. Obviously the longer I left it in the beaker the more areas bleached out, and it created a lovely graduation from full colour that faded to almost
refresher white at the very end. I then wanted to screen print with discharge along the very top of the colour fade, so it would look as if moths are emerging out of the white faded fabric. However for this to work I had to steam the dress for 5-10mins, and by the time I had pulled it out of the steamer, it had increased the bleaching effect all over the dress, and I lost the lovely graduation and an obvious white line had appeared. Because each dress I have is different and unique, each one is an experiment. So Alan suggested that I use Photoshop to build layers and create a digital screen printing effect, as a way of playing around and manipulating the dresses, without actually having to cut them up just yet. This I think is a very good idea so I have swapped the print room for now, for the studio where I can work on Photoshop. I do love the print room but I can see myself spending weeks in there experimenting with fabrics and still not having anything worth using or keeping, and at this stage I just don’t think I have time to be experimenting for weeks.
HOLES 1st March
T
his week I photographed all the dresses and have been layering images up on Photoshop to produce prints, patterns and images, I’m not sure what for yet. I also created a pattern to be laser cut. The idea is quite simple, small moth shape holes that are placed in a way that produces a pattern of one big moth. I had not used the laser cutter before so I wanted to experiment with a few possible ideas and see what effect I get. I booked out an afternoon session and laser cut a design onto the back of a blouse I found from my grandmas attic. The idea was that some of the pattern would be engraved and some would be cut, however everything is an experiment and the engraving didn’t really work, I need to adjust the laser settings, because it just cut straight through the fabric.
I also tried an etching, the original design was about A3 size but the etching takes so long I only managed to complete one small moth in the corner. But I didn’t mind, as I only really wanted to see the effects I could gain using different types of fabric. The etching worked best on the mustard velvet, we had to play around with the settings for a while as the pile on the velvet was quite thick so we were unsure of how deep to let the laser cutter go without completely cutting through the fabric. I think this would be a nice idea to perhaps create fabric samples with my own designs on and then etched or laser cut into, almost distressing the fabric in an aesthetically pleasing way. This week I want to continue playing around with layering images and designs to create samples I can digitally print.
phwoar ANISH KAPOOR 5th march
I
went to Manchester city gallery today with a couple of my friends. I had been told by my friend Jim there was an Anish Kapoor exhibition starting soon and that I wouldn’t be disappointed. He was right. It was amazing. Kapoor’s exhibition was all about perception and space, and how things are not always what they seem. It definitely had the wow factor it was so cool. He had huge sculptures embedded into walls in bright yellow paint, you couldn’t tell if it was hollow or curved, the colour was so deep and perfect it could of just been a painted spot or fabric on the wall. Mad wax sculptures that melted off the wall and sand sculptures towering up from the floor. My favourite piece was ‘when I am pregnant’, it was a huge nearly floor to ceiling sculpture that emerged from the white wall like a perfectly round pregnant bump. The whole exhibition was laid out perfectly, as I walked round each the rooms, each sculpture that came into view point, was composed for maximum effect and confusion. Looking
at the brilliant white wall and pregnant bump, my eyes refused to focus, not being able to tell where the flatness of the wall started and ended, without looking at the profile. It made you feel dizzy but I Ioved it.
Images from anishkapoor.com
JIMI T
he same day I went to the Richard Goodall Gallery as rumour had it they were showcasing some cool Jimi Hendrix prints. The artist was Gered Mankowitz who photographed Hendrix in his yard studio back in 1967. He has re edited them digitally to produce some amazing colourful prints. Some had been digitally edited and printed to replica Lenticular printing, his use of colour was perfect. It made me think about injecting more colour into my black and white photographs. I think he captured the spirit of the psychedelic tripping sixties very well. My favourite print had been printed onto metal bronze sheeting, the detail was amazing and the texture it gave, made me want to stroke it. Life is so much better when you can see and touch things, how else can you fully appreciate it?
Photgraphs from Richard Goodhall Gallery
The JACKET
7th march
N
O tutorial today. I know what I need to do this week, I have planned out my own deadlines for Friday and what I need to achieve, so going to tutorial today will just confuse me further I’m sure. I like the alternating between Julie and Alex, as they always have different views and ideas for my work, but sometimes it feels like its difficult to move forward when each week is like catch up on what they have missed
the previous week. I know they are both obviously very busy, but I think it would be good if we could see them both during the space of one week, perhaps on Monday and Friday. Sometimes I will go into a tutorial feeling ahead, knowing exactly what I want to do and leave feeling like I have been dragged back a couple of weeks, utterly confused to where I am and what I should be doing now. I have an old navy blazer that
my grandma gave me a couple of years ago. At first it only had a couple of moth holes, so it was fine to wear. Yet the longer I had it, more and more moth holes began appearing. At first I just thought maybe I hadn’t noticed all the holes that had always been there and then my mum terrified me by saying that there were probably still loads of moth eggs inside behind the lining that were eating away at the
jacket. This was a disgusting thought that made me itch myself to the shower. I chopped of the plastic gold buttons that could be reused, wrapped the jacket in a carrier bag and left it by my door to be thrown away. Well I dug it out the other day, after remembering that I never got round to throwing it away. I have decided that I want to create a feature of these moth holes, and design a new lining to sew back into
the jacket, so you can see the pattern of the lining through the holes in the back. I think this will be a nice way of reusing an existing garment whilst still holding onto its past identity. So I have been continuing to create designs, with now the intention of a possible lining for the jacket.
14th march
A
n EMOTIONAL weekend. My Grandma has been diagnosed with terminal cancer. It has been a huge shock and I ended up going home this weekend to spend some time with my family, mainly my mum. I will be going home quite regularly now. It has caught me off guard and thrown my Uni work out of the window. The plot has been lost. But it has not been a total let down concerning my work. I showed my mum my digital work so far and she suggested some good ideas. Sometimes my mum will suggest obvious and simple things, marking my work in her art teacher way, and I get frustrated that she doesn’t think outside of the school box, but sometimes it is the simple obvious things that people forget to mention, that can pass straight by. I showed her my photographs and designs so far and she thought they looked too complicated, too many layers, and when printed on to fabric I will probably loose a lot of the detail you see through the light behind the computer screen. She is probably right. I remember now my tutorial with Alex and Julie they said I needed to simplify my illustrations and designs, but I think I just like to layer things up. I like images to be complicated, I like the fact that it you don’t take care, absorbing it all in, you wont understand the whole picture fully. Life
is complicated no one understands it fully. I know people will miss things, but I like the fact that if you take your time you may notice something small, perhaps seemingly insignificant, that others may not, and then suddenly its like everything makes sense. Its like a secret your not sure if anyone knows about and you can decide whether you want to point it out and let others in on it. There is something exciting about knowing a secret, a private joke between you and
LOST The PLOT yourself. My mum started unpicking my blazer for me, but unpicked the wrong seem. Oh well. I can sew it up and unpick the rest. I appreciate her help. Colwyn Road. Now that could make a nice title. Colwyn road. It holds a lot of history that big house on Colwyn road. My Grandmas house. Mountains of furniture and possessions and clothes. some rooms when you walk in are like stepping back in time. I love it. I know my dad will restore it beautifully, keeping a lot of its history and character, although it will take the rest of his life. its such a beautiful house on colwyn road, so much potential. Let me tell you about it. Years
ago my grandmother bought it with my granddad, they owned 5 huge Victorian town houses at one point renting the rooms out like a guest house/b+b, my grandma would cook breakfast and do their washing. She still to this day does not own a washing machine, preferring her mangle. Colwyn road is the biggest. It has nine flats, three on each floor with their own bathroom, and kitchen. Yet it still feels like a house. A huge grand entrance with a wide staircase, which has beautiful wooden banister rails and features. Every room has high ceilings and a fireplace. Half of the rooms are full to the brim with furniture or clothes stacked high. Grandma Rajczonek is a serious hoarder. The best room is the back room it’s huge, about the size of a small studio flat except the bathroom and kitchen are further down the corridor. It has four tall windows, that overlooks the racecourse. This room is my brother Jason’s room. Although it is not finished yet and he is not ready to make it his own. my dad has promised it to him and no one is allowed to take it. Okay this is turning into a story so perhaps I should stop here. Perhaps I should be a writer. I can’t help it I just love stories. After we are dead and gone what is there left except stories and memories? That will eventually be forgotten.
(image of colwyn road front door here)
COLWYN road 23rd march
W
here the hell are these weeks going? They seem to be just flying past. This week I went home after Alex’s advice that I should just start making installations, putting things together photographing them. Its nice I have my own studio set up in one of the spare rooms in Colwyn where I have been arranging furniture and objects to create a scene from Colwyn road. I feel like a set designer I love it. I spent Monday and Tuesday with Dad finding wardrobes, tables and chairs from various decades ranging from early 1920’s up until the late 70’s. I found heaps of curtains and bed covers printed with crazy 60s floral patterns. Beautiful carved art deco style wardrobes. Everything is piled high carefully balanced on top of another, like a house game of Buckeroo. So it was quite a process selecting items and rearranging the room to make a path to carry it through. My dad has been very good and patient, in fact I’m sure he has enjoyed treasure hunting the furniture as much as me. I have played around with laying out different pieces of
furniture together to see what effect and vibe it gives me. I have been particularly aware of space, marking out my 2.5meters of exhibition space, trying to not to over step it or fill it too much. I cant decide whether I want it to feel like cross section from Colwyn road that has been sliced out and placed into the studio, or a container with everything sprawled out, revealing somebody’s life, memories, objects, photos from 1920’s until the 1970’s. Colwyn road is overflowing with character and style from my Grandmothers generation. Things she has collected and bought. My Grandma came to this county as a refugee after her family was forced to leave her home and everything they owned and worked hard for, during the war when Russia was trying to claim parts of East Poland. I think this helps explain why she has never since left her home for any length of time, why she collects and digs things out from old skips in the alley and cannot throw anything away. I have been debating today, whether I should create a scene with furniture from one selected decade such as the 1920’s or the 1950’s. I want it to look
authentic, without looking like an Ikea furnished house from the chosen decade. Realistically only wealthy people could afford to completely refurnish and redecorate their homes. And this would not be an accurate representation of Colwyn road, or my views on choosing sustainable lives rather than fast fashion trends. Instead I think its best to show a collection of furniture and objects that have been collected by my grandmother. It takes time and hard work to earn money for fine furniture and objects, it takes years to create a home that is comfortably your own. Things were passed on through generations. Things used to be built to last.
25th March
O
k I have two weeks now until Easter and according to my time table I need to have all my samples ready and finished so I can just get on with the journal and portfolio, setting up the installation for when I get back. This leaves me with A LOT of work to do over the next few days. I have wanted to make a book for ages now and I have this idea of making my portfolio into a book with fabric pages that reveal and conceal images and patterns. I want it to visually tell the story of the clothes, but I have no idea how I am going to do this. I began making a small book with tracing paper and acetate as a way of layering images and patterns. I want to experiment making more so when it comes to my final portfolio I will have a clearer idea of how and what it will be made up of.
REVEALING and CONCEALING
4th April
I
MOCK lineup
had a tutorial today with Julie and we discussed everything that was happening so far with my project, and we came to the conclusion that I should not just have fabric samples and a book for my end of year work. I would really like to see some of the samples made up into garments to show that connection between a conceptual idea, to actual fashion. My initial aim of this year was to build an emotional
connection between clothes and people, to reuse existing materials, whilst still keeping their past identity. So with Julie’s help I have made a paper pattern from the original navy blazer lining and I have decided which print I will use. I photographed the pattern and worked out how the print will fit onto the pattern on Photoshop. The main lining is split into five panels and I want the print to flow across the seams with little disruption.
This week I am going to draw lots of garment shapes and ideas, as I am not trend focused I want to keep it simple, classic but with a suggestion of something, dare I say, directional. I need to get all my prints into the print room before Friday so I can get Lydia to pick them up for me over the Easter holidays next week. I’m going to Riga on Monday for five days so that’s a week lost.
LATVIA 11th April
T
his week I went to Riga, in Latvia for five days with thirteen friends. It was in celebration of six birthdays in the space of two weeks. The last project’s feedback left me with a rather cynical view, that no matter how hard I work, It will never be good enough. So I agreed that I would go to Latvia during the Eas-
ter holidays, at a time when I would be most stressed out with no doubt a massive work load and never ending to-do list. Obviously as soon as I started my current project and was reunited with my motivation I immediately regretted this decision. But I was not going to waste the money I had already paid month’s prior for the flight. Anyway I had an amazing time. One day we caught the train out of Riga to the
coast, where we spent the day at the beach, where the snow met sand. We came across this abandoned hotel that had been completely smashed up and graffiti covered every wall. I brought my SLR with me as well as my little digital camera, and fell in love with photography again. Developing the film and scanning the negatives In the Mac suit, reminded me how excited I would get in the dark room, the anticipation, waiting for the photographs to appear.
18th April
T
he jacket is complete! I had so many dilemmas about laser cutting the back. The laser cutter machine was out of order the last week of term meaning I was unable to get my design cut into the back of the jacket. I was not organised enough to get it cut before the last week, mainly because I just could not decide which design to go with. I have become so indecisive recently it is ridiculous. There was just something that I didn’t like about the laser cut holes, anyway I decided I would bonda web the inside back of the jacket and cut small holes out with some tiny scissors. I then placed smaller bits of fabric from the off cuts of the jacket lining and backed the holes. This way you can see the strong colours through the holes without the holes in the jacket fraying too much. I think the smaller holes I cut by hand look more natural, than the symmetrical laser pattern I had designed.
Complete
24th April
O
n my way back up to Manchester. It’s just too hard to work at home especially over Easter holidays. Why does it have to be so beautifully hot and sunny now when I have a month left of Uni, and should be locked up in my room beavering away. It’s depressing because I know as soon as I finish the sun will be gone. Anyway I came back home to Northampton last week with my material I had digitally printed so my mum can help me sew everything together. I had a long to do list and very little has actually been completed. I think I should just stop trying to be organised, writing lists, planning things and just accept the fact I am an unorganised chaotic mess. Perhaps then I will stop being so disappointed with myself when things just don’t get done. The first thing that went wrong was the digital printing. Vicky chopped the end of one of my prints off before it had finished printing, and didn’t have time to print
How to SEW
them again. Two prints were affected and that meant the material was not big enough for my designs. One was to be sewn into a long top/dress and the other inserted into the back of an existing cardigan I found. I did play around with it trying to make it work, and I think the long top will be ok although it is slightly too narrow, width wise, I have left it with my instructions in Northampton, I know my mum will be able to make it fit. It did mean however that I had very little seam allowance, I originally intended to do a French seam as I printed it on habotai silk, that I have attached to, an amended silk nightdress I collected from Colwyn road. Complete with tiny little red buttons I chopped off an old baby’s cardigan. We had to over lock the seams instead which I am annoyed about because I don’t think it is a pretty enough stitch for my design. And I’m worried it brings the top down. I hate the over locker stitch. I know it is what they use in the industry but to me it makes me think cheap sweatshop. But what can I do? my mum convinced
me it looks ok and showed me various silk tops she has, where the seam has been over locked. It is just frustrating because if my fabric had only been printed properly I would not of had this problem. I don’t have time to wait for it to be printed again, its another week until we are even back at Uni. The second print that was affected was the pink faded to grey print, I wanted to insert it as a panel into the back of a beautiful mint green lambs wool cardigan. But the fabric was just too short, where the printer had stopped printing too soon, and my mum and I tried cutting the shape out of the print but it just didn’t work. I was very disappointed but what can I do? Maybe this is why re used clothing is not that popular to work with, it is just so restrictive sometimes and I don’t posses the pattern cutting or sewing skills to tackle it by myself. I wish our course would just teach me what I want to know, how to sew!
25th April
I
went to Joe’s parents for Easter dinner yesterday and his dad brought down this really old quality street tin, which he told me belonged to his mother, inside were hundreds of buttons she had collected for years, mainly from cutting them off old clothes before throwing them away. It was amazing! There were so many cool random buttons. We spent a couple of hours sorting through them and threading the matching ones together. There were
ones from his dad’s old postman uniform and loads of cool art deco style buttons. I collected a small box of my favourite ones and kept a look out for three buttons I could use for my blazer and found a handful of tiny buttons in tones of orange, pink, red, brown and gold that I may use instead for the back of the top that is still being finished.
BUTTONS
The SILK TOP
5th May
O
n Monday I had a sort of chat/tutorial with Julie and she confirmed my fear that the jacket would of looked more ‘considered’ if it had been laser cut…I know! Anyway I don’t see why it was not considered when I have done laser designs on illustrator and have had samples cut. Surely the laser cutter being out of action and my decision to cut the holes by hand and just go with it, was a
considered decision? Ah what’s done is done. I have no time to look back now. I am still very pleased with the jacket and I think the idea of reusing existing clothing and celebrating the moth eaten holes is obvious enough. Why has this year left me doubting every single thing I do? No wonder I can’t just make a decision and just go with it. The silk top is amazing. I know that sounds very big headed but I was so scared that the
fabric was too narrow and that it wouldn’t work with the silk nightdress attached to the back. Whilst I was at home the week before, we were working out other possible options of attaching it to this cashmere/ wool cable knit, jumper dress my mum had picked up from a charity shop and has never worn. I know that sounds dodgy but I had this idea of attaching the silk panel to the back and then sewing over parts of the tree and around the moths, effectively quilting it. I thought
about cutting opening the front and opening the huge roll neck collar to create a cardigan. But I just wasn’t convinced and my instincts loved my original idea; to make a silk vest top. So we went back through my sketches and ideas and combined a few designs to make the final pattern. I used a top that I had actually been wearing that day, as the starting block pattern and adapted the shape from there, whilst getting hooked on The Crimson and the White Petal. In the
end I just had to come back up to Manchester but I left it with my mum to finish. She has done a beautiful job, she even covered the over lock stitch by sewing a covered seam and hand cut all the biased binding. O I love you mum! I received it in the post a couple of days ago and got Julie to help me mark out he button holes on the back I cant believe how well the buttons go with the top, the random buttons I found from Joe’s dad’s button tin. I think they tie the front and the back to-
gether so nicely. I was nervous about the biased binding being white silk around the neck line and the arm hole, but I think it links the back to the front, so It doesn’t just look like a print on the front and then a white separate back.
Grandma’s HOUSE 7th May
I
am on the train back to Northampton after a week of trying to sort my life out. Okay I have written a very detailed timetable of exactly what I need to achieve and still have to do in under three weeks. It’s seriously scary how close the deadline is. So I have decided that I need to photograph my top and blazer being worn and I think it makes sense that the natural setting for this photo shoot should be at Colwyn Road, the title of my project, the source of my inspiration. I’ve brought my film SLR
camera to take some nice wide angled black and white photographs and I’m also going to borrow my brothers digital SLR to capture some colour photos. I have brought all my garment and pieces I made from the previous research and development project with me, so I can play around with photographing it all, hopefully to create some sort of portfolio with. Looking back at my project I have remembered how much I loved it. I think I got really disheartened by the end of the last term but flicking through my sketchbooks reminded me
how much I actually enjoyed that project. My idea for this Photo shoot is to use some of the empty rooms to arrange some furniture and create a very simple and quite empty scene in which I can place my model and create hopefully some very simple yet beautiful shots. I want to capture some portraits that capture the tone and emotion of my work. I think this is going to be difficult, as I would love the images to look peaceful yet…magical? That’s a cringey word, I’ll just stick with beautiful.
Tim Walker
7th May
I
have been looking through endless fashion photographers’ work to give me inspiration, but it also freaks me out a bit as I know my work won’t even compare. One of my favourite fashion photographers is Tim Walker. I just love how whimsical and fantasy like his work is. He creates these imaginative scenes that are like stories, with so much going on. His models are so expressive in shape and form; his photographs being composed so beautifully. Every shoot is like a storyboard of photographs.
Photographs by Tim Walker.
9th May
Y
Feel my DREAMS from here
esterday I spent the whole day photographing all my work. It was an early start but I knew it would take some time to get through all my garments. I used Georgie as my model and I think she worked really well with my concept and theme. I wanted to vary some of the locations maybe, but the best light was the sunlight pouring through the window in the top back room. It’s so lovely on the top floor, as the tree tops and chimneys are eye level and the view out of front window is the sky. I had decided I wanted Georgie’s hair big, in a Pre Raphaelite messy sort of style, with her make up simple but with red lips. I wanted to photograph my
garments being worn, but in way that shows off their feature pocket, print, or laser holes etc. creating simple yet beautiful composures in Colwyn Road. There was a lovely backdrop I used in one of the rooms that has wallpaper pealing down the green walls, with orange curtains and an old Edinburgh School of Art desk. I got my dad to help me bounce light coming in from one window off a mirror and into the space. Here I shot a few really nice photographs of the blazer and top, but I’m not sure if I like the lighting as much as I did in the top bedroom with brick walls. There the light is warmer, I think the green wallpaper downstairs creates a very cold
light, but when I open them on Photoshop I will see what I can do. I also sorted through what furniture I will be taking up with me to use for my degree show. I am thinking of using the trunk, rather than the wardrobe, with the idea that you can pull out the fabric samples, like a dressing up box of scarves. But I’m sure I will change my mind at some point over the next two weeks. I really need to get started on my portfolio but not before I send the rest of my print designs through on Wednesday.
PRINT 10th may
T
his week I am concentrating on finishing up my print designs so I can send them to print on Wednesday, the queue is two weeks long apparently so if I want to get them back in time I need to decide which ones I want to print. The designs I have chosen to print, have been inspired by Colwyn Road and the clothes and fabrics I have collected. I decided that although some of them are not necessarily for any garments in particular, I think it would suit my project, to have a variety of samples that can be pulled out of the trunk, hung up etc. I only made the jacket and the silk top in the end, but after speaking with Julie, we decided the concept behind them is clear; to reuse existing garments and combining them with something original, whilst still maintaining their past identity, to create an emotional connection. I printed the samples on Habotai Silk, 50x50cm, so i have the option of selling them as silk head scarves, if i want to make any money back. i did think it would be nice to print samples on various fabrics, but the digital print room is crazy busy at the moment and half their fabrics have run out and I didn’t want to take the risk of them not being printed in time.
16th May
I
have decided that my portfolio should reflect me as a designer, my style, how I like to work, as well as tell the story of Colwyn road. So I want to produce a hand bound book. I am going to bind the book myself, as I have done bookbinding workshops before. After speaking with Ian the technician in the Mac suit and John from the binding workshops, I have decided the best way for me to create this, will be to print front and back on A3 220g paper from the paper store, and trim the pages down to 297x297mm. I want my book to be square, as I found it quite difficult laying out pages that were A3 portrait, and it didn’t look quite right landscape, for my work anyway. This book will form part of my project as well as be my portfolio that shows my work as a designer, hopefully something I can take to interviews with me. Well this is the plan, we will see what it turns out like. So this week and the next I will be creating my book.
READ me
31st May
S
etting up the exhibition, preparing for the rest of my life. Three years gone, the end to my life of education.
THE Beginning