Adam and Eve - the True Story

Adam was the boss, of course, since all this happened three thousand years ago. But only now, at last, can the truth be told… what REALLY happened in that beautiful garden? Well, ...Adam wanted pancakes, he was desperate for pancakes. He called Eve out of their cave kitchen and told her he wanted pancakes. “But I haven’t got all the ingredients,” she protested. “Have you got flour?” “Yes, I’ve got flour.” “Have you got milk?” “The very best billy goat milk, yes.” (Don’t say you’ve never lied to your spouse.) “Have you got eggs?” “Ooh yes, free range eggs.” “So what haven’t you got? Why can’t I have my pancakes?” “No lemons!” “But, there’s a beautiful big lemon tree in the middle of this garden.” “It’s ‘out of bounds’.” “Not if you’ve got your *Attestation de Déplacement…” “I might be stopped by *Dupont, he’s everywhere!” “Then pick two lemons and give him one!” Adam got his crèpes – and Eve went down for stealing forbidden fruit – and bribery. Isn’t that just like the thing?

*Attestation de Déplacement Dérogatoire is the signed and dated form we have to have with us every time we leave the house - it’s a ‘Permit to go out’ for certain specified reasons (e.g. to shop for food or take a short walk for exercise) Detective Dupont was one of the two not so bright policemen in the Tintin stories by Hergé.