September 2015
Inside this Issue... The Healing Powers of Reiki
Skydiving in Paradise Shore Recipes
Asian Lettuce Wraps
Beer Corner Oktoberfest
Students of 08742
Point Beach Ready for Fall Sports
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September 2015
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641 Arnold Avenue, Point Pleasant Beach • 723-892-0728 In search of the worn, the tattered, the crusty & rusty, chippy look of antique furnishing and accessories. Old shutters & frames with their crumbling paint appeal to us. Those ancient garden statues with moss adorning, we can’t seem to get enough. What is it about these things from the past that speaks to our senses? “Patina”, a thin layer that variously forms on a surface, whether it be metal, stone or wood, we seem to gravitate towards anything with a natural “patina”. It is a great day, the best of best of days in fact when we find that thing with a natural patina. What if you have a “thing” but it does not have the wonderful old time worn look that you crave? Can you create it? Is there a way to bring the “look” into your home without the old basement or attic smell, without the chipping lead based paint? Well of course there is! You can transform your home, with the use of a number of creative user-friendly products, into a page from your favorite home décor magazine. Here is a simple way to create an aged time worn look on a few items you may already have in your home. Take a gold frame or bookends for instance. Start with a base coat of white paint. We like to use Old White Chalk Paint by Annie Sloan because it sticks to everything. Next begin to layer a different color, perhaps French Linen. This will begin to add depth. Try not to cover the entire piece, leave bits of Old White peaking out and don’t be perfect with the paint. At this point, you can even wipe away some paint to reveal the original color. You can layer as many colors as you like, we often use only two or three to add shadows and highlights. You can choose to add wax for protection and patina after your paint dries. Annie Sloan’s Soft Dark Wax is great for this purpose. Taking a brush, gently apply the Dark Wax to patina in some areas, remember not to be perfect, as you want it to have a time worn appearance. Buff away any excess wax and your project is complete. You can repeat paint and wax steps to achieve varied levels of depth. Chalk paint by Annie Sloan is a low VOC environmentally friendly product that can be used in your home. Clean up is with soap and water, no messy smelly products needed. Get your creative juices flowing and add some “Patina” to your home today. At Magnolia Lane Design we have many user-friendly products that can help you transform your home into the beautiful place you dream of.
Paint Tip of the Month What if you want to add wax but not dark wax? Simple, take a bit of Annie Sloan’s Soft Clear Wax and add a few drops of say Old White. Now you have a white wax to add patina. You can do this with any of Annie Sloan’s Chalk Paint colors, simply mix up, apply and buff off excess.
September 2015
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All Business What Lawyers Do — Your “Little” Questions Answered by Christy Schmidt, Esq.
Afterwards, all attorneys swear to uphold the law and work under a strict code of behavior – The Rules of Professional Conduct (“RPC”). Here are two provisions from the New Jersey Rules (the “RPC”):
Lawyers. Reviled, respected. Can’t live with ‘em, go to the chair without ‘em. The target for jokes and blame. What exactly do lawyers do? And why do they all use so much Latin?
RPC 1.1 Competence, states: A lawyer shall not: (a) Handle or neglect a matter entrusted to the lawyer in such manner that the lawyer’s conduct constitutes gross negligence. (b) Exhibit a pattern of negligence or neglect in the lawyer’s handling of legal matters generally.
Lawyers have completed at the very least, an undergraduate degree and completed law school thereby earning a Juris Doctor, called a “JD” (yes, lawyers are “doctors” since they have earned a doctorate – but ethical rules prevent them calling themselves “doctors” due to the confusion it would cause the public.) To practice law, the law school graduate then is required to pass an examination – The Bar Exam – for each state in which they practice. Patent lawyers, for example, then have to have a science or engineering background and take an additional exam.
RPC 2.1. Advisor, adds: In representing a client, a lawyer shall exercise independent professional judgment and render candid advice. In rendering advice, a lawyer may refer not only to law but to other considerations, such as moral, economic, social and political facts, that may be relevant to the client’s situation.
Afterwards, a lawyer earns experience in their particular area or areas of expertise through additional training and experience. This is why it is called “the practice of law.” Each and every matter is a new experience with new issues. Most people know that attorneys must pass “The Bar Exam” – but most people do not know that once an attorney passes that exam, they are required to pass an ethics exam and complete investigation by the licensing committee.
In this issue, we will look at an example to demonstrate what goes on in an attorney’s mind – specifically, what an Estate and Tax Lawyer does to satisfy those two ethical requirements. When you hire a lawyer to create an estate plan for you, the lawyer is doing much more than drafting a Last Will. The lawyer is listening to you and studying your life and your needs. Then everything you disclose – or fail to disclose – is examined under that attorney’s experience, knowledge and skill, resulting in recommendations that fit your situation. The retention of an Estate and Tax Attorney is vital for every adult in this country. Probate, property, tax and social services laws make the hiring of competent counsel necessary to protect your assets and family. Most attorney’s fees are very reasonable compared with the expense, upset and stress of failing to plan. Without proper estate planning, for example, your property may be subject to almost a 40% tax rate at death. Even the hiring of counsel should be carefully considered – and you should select an attorney who has experience in tax and estate planning. For example, a client recently hired me to probate her mother’s estate. When my office examined the Will, we discovered the attorney who had drafted it had made serious mistakes. For example, the drafting attorney – although very competent as a divorce litigator – had limited tax law knowledge – and failed to protect her mother’s assets from New Jersey Estate Tax (starting at 37% of the amount over $675,000). When you hire an attorney, you hire his or her entire experience, knowledge and skill. If you consult with an attorney and they do not ask questions or seem to rush through the process, rethink hiring him or her. An attorney complying with the Rules of Professional Conduct is going to ask a lot of questions – even pry – and will take significant time to personally wade through the information.
291 Herbertsville Road, Brick, NJ 08724
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Legal Ease A column that simplifies areas of the legal industry for every day consumption. This month’s topic...
A Law Firm Where Every Client Matters!
Speeding
by Christopher J. Grenda, Esq.
Speeding is typically defined as exceeding the posted speed limit of a specific roadway, driving too fast for roadway conditions, or racing. It is an axiom that speeding is a dangerous driving behavior. Although there has been marked progress in other areas, such as increased seat belt use and fewer drunk driving deaths, according to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) speeding continues to be a major factor in nearly one-third of traffic fatalities; some 13,000 lives are lost to speeding each year; and, accidents where speed is at issue costs society more than $40 billion annually. Moreover, 47 percent of speeding events occur on roads with posted speed limits of 50mph or less, while more than 20 percent occur on roads with posted speed limits of 35mph or less. Additionally, speeding is often one component of aggressive driving, defined by the NHTSA as committing a combination of moving traffic offenses so as to endanger other persons or property. As a result, some states have passed aggressive driving laws that trace these actions, such as, but not limited to: speeding; failing to observe a traffic control device; failing to yield; following too closely (tailgating); and improper passing. In New Jersey, in addition to fines, we have a point based system. Therefore, a person guilty of speeding from 1 to 14 miles over the limit will receive 2 motor vehicle points on their driver’s license. Speeding from 15 to 29 is a 4-point offense and 30 miles or more is a 5-point offense. Additionally, in a posted 65 mph zone, construction zones, and areas marked “safe corridor”, the fines are doubled. In some cases, typically where high speeds and aggressive driving are involved, the offender may lose their driving privileges for a designated period of time, typically 10 to 90 days. Speeding cases are oftentimes difficult to beat in court. It is advisable to obtain competent legal representation when faced with speeding charge in New Jersey. Christopher J. Grenda, Esq. is an attorney licensed in the State of New Jersey with offices in Toms River, New Jersey. Mr. Grenda holds a Bachelor of Arts (BA) in History/Pre-Law from Limestone College in Gaffney, South Carolina and a Juris Doctorate (JD) from Thomas M. Cooley Law in Lansing, Michigan. Mr. Grenda is a former municipal prosecutor who handled multiple towns throughout Ocean and Monmouth counties. Today, Mr. Grenda is a sole practitioner who primarily practices in DWI Defense; Criminal Defense; Real Estate; and Wills. September 2015
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Christopher J. Grenda, Esq. is a former prosecutor who has handled: • Thousands of DWI Cases • Thousands of Criminal Cases including Drug Possession and Assault/Domestic Violence • Tens of Thousands of Traffic Cases
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The Healing Powers of Reiki
by Rev. Allison Feehan, RMT, owner of Integrative Healing and Wellness
Energy medicine or energy-based therapies have been known to be a form of complementary or alternative medicine based on its ability to balance the body’s energy field. An energy imbalance can result in illness or dis-ease; physically, mentally and or spiritually. Reiki is just one of those energy therapies that offer a re-balancing of the body’s energy by restoring energies that have become weak, disturbed or out of balance, allowing the body to heal by activating its natural energies.
which represent different levels of consciousness. Chakra means “wheel”; a vortex of vibration, light and energy. Their primary function is to maximize the physical body and to bring about the development of our consciousness. Reiki works to open the chakras, align their movement and optimize synchronization and balance each one. A ‘block’ is a place where energy is trapped or constricted which affects the entire chakra system causing the need for compensation in another chakra. When energy flows through the whole body it creates harmony and releases dis-ease. Reiki assists to bring the chakras into alignment and balance. Reiki has been reported to relieve stress, grief, allergies, cancer pain, headaches/migraines, inefficiencies, ADHD/ADD, anxiety, emotional stressors, back/body aches, depression, fatigue, and much more.
Reiki is a Japanese form of energy healing utilizing our own internal energy; Ki which runs through each and every one of us down to the cellular level. The seven chakras, or seals, are powerful energy centers within the body
Everything is energy and energy is everything and all living matter is comprised of energy. Moreover, each experience in our lives leaves an energetic imprint in our energy system. As a result, traumatic experiences work against optimal health and well-being. Therefore, if we do not regularly clear and balance our energy systems, we manifest physical, mental and emotional dis-ease. Reiki works to remove energy blockages from our bodies, balances our masculine and feminine energies and revives our chakra system
Healing the mind, body and spirit through various modalities and techniques...
The term alternative medicine is an outdated term that communities equate with health practices that aren’t a part of mainstream conventional medicine. Alternative therapies are becoming more accepted and the once questionable treatments are now being integrated into hospitals, clinics, and academic centers-treating the whole person.
Located in beautiful Bay Head, NJ in the historic old Applegate’s Hardware Store building 524 Lake Avenue Suite 107 Bay Head, NJ 08742
According to the Consortium of Academic Health Centers for Integrative Medicine, “Integrative medicine is the practice of medicine that reaffirms the importance of the relationship between practitioner and patient, focusing on the whole person, is informed by evidence, and makes therapeutic approaches, health care professionals and disciplines to achieve optimal health and healing”.
Appointments ONLY Call 732-864-6846
The main focus on medicine still includes the guiding principles of prevention and activity but the changing focus on medicine is adding; natural healing treatments and holistic care-treating the person-mind body and spirit.
September 2015
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Staying Home Perfectionism by Christy Schmidt
This is the month of pressure: Kids return to school or college. They feel pressured, we feel pressures. We all want to get it all right. So, this month we are going to screw up really badly. We are going to make mistakes and errors and faux pas. We are going to get our facts wrong. Hold uninformed opinions. Spell words wrong. Dangle prepositions. And we will still be beautiful, marvelous miracles deserving of love and compassion. Perfectionism. The fear of making a mistake. The belief that one can live without “sin.” Straining towards flawlessness. Being self-critical to the point of freezing. One can be a work-perfectionist. Some, relationship-perfectionists. Throwing a “perfect” party, making a “perfect” soufflé, wearing the “perfect” clothing…getting the “perfect” grades…being the “perfect” athlete. It’s exhausting. When we break it down, perfectionism is the result of an immersion in the need to feel significant – or, if you prefer, the result of an unbalanced (overactive) solar chakra. Same thing. Really look at it: When we seek to be perfect, what are we really doing? We are trying to avoid criticism. We are trying to be “the best” – better than everyone else. We reach for unattainable ideals and continually correct and re-correct ourselves until it’s “perfect.” The act of attempting perfection is an act of self-hate. You think what you do without personal criticism is not good enough. You fear criticism. You worry others will not like you. Psychologists know perfectionism is the result of over-criticism as a child – or a lack of boundaries, or lack of self-worth and the need for approval from others. This is a deep fear: That we will not be loved (because we are not enough, we are not “right,” we are “bad.”) The result: Depression. Body dissatisfaction. Loneliness and social isolation. Anxiety. Anger at or blaming of others. Let’s get to the bottom of it. First, perfectionism is unnecessary. Assuming Shakespeare really wrote all with which he is credited, not all his plays are great. Really. Read them. His “masterpieces” are few. Others, like Trolius and Cressida, are entertaining at best. So, even arguably the “best” writer ever had failures. The key here is where one critic will say a play is average or poor, another will deem it a “masterpiece.” Perfectionism is September 2015
subjective and a perception in the eye of the beholder. Second, the scary part is that true perfection is unattainable. It’s a myth. Black and white thinking. Matter and energy are in flux and constantly changing. Everything and anything can always be changed or improved. The idea there is a point of “perfect” is madness. Last, and most importantly, doing one’s best is not the same as trying to be perfect. Practicing excellence and striving to perform at your peak is not perfectionism. For example, I pen these articles and usually review two to three drafts before I am satisfied. I might find better words. Correct spelling and grammatical errors. Use a better metaphor to make a point. Then, I ask myself: Is this the best I can do? Am I communicating what I want to say? Will the reader benefit from these words? In short, did I do the best I could to accomplish the goal in the time allotted? That’s personal integrity. If I was striving for perfection, my message would never get out there and I would not help anyone. Here are some guidelines: Forget “perfect” – practice doing your best. Practice being honorable and having personal integrity. You dress well when you go out for the evening – but you do not cancel plans because you do not have the “perfect” shoes. You thoroughly and ethically research your paper and write it with focus and attention, then you turn it in because you got the job done well. Recognize you can control some aspects of a project or steps towards any goal – but you cannot control it all. When you feel perfectionism rearing its ugly head, try to locate the true feelings behind it. Why does your self-esteem get triggered? About what are you really afraid? Sit with it. Then tell it to shut up. “Thank you emotions and lizard brain for telling me I am feeling vulnerable and frightened. I see why and I am going to move on!” Then ask yourself: Is continuing to alter this project (or action) to improve it worth my time? Is it necessary? This is a check on your personal integrity. One more thought: Has anyone really looked at the platypus? Even the creator, the universe, nature – whatever your preference –
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tries new things that do not quite work. On what we should focus is our personal integrity. The true test of character is getting up and trying again. Correcting your mistake. Making an apology. Making amends. Strive to be the best YOU can be in all your imperfect glory. Christy Schmidt is a professor, certified life coach and mediator with over 20 years of consulting and coaching experience. Her company, Ansuz, LLC, offers oneon-one coaching, business consulting, and empowering workshops to help you become your ideal self and live your dream life! Contact her about the Happiness Path: A Free Workshop to show you the 08742 Ad scientifically validated way to become and stay happy! Or, get some Spring Coaching and become your OWN BEST FRIEND!
CHRISTY A. SCHMIDT PROFESSIONAL SUCCESS COACH CERTIFIED KEIRSEY™ TEMPERAMENT PROFESSIONAL CERTIFIED CHAKRA THERAPIST
(732) 903-7884 LIFE CAN BE ALL YOU WANT IT TO BE! Meet your goals – Live your dreams! Individual and Group Life or Career Coaching Entrepreneur / Leadership Coaching Empowered Living Stress Management / Meditation Work-Life Balance / Time Management Healthy Habits / Fitness Creative Rehabilitation Conflict Resolution / Relationships Workshops and Corporate Retreats Business Expansion / Income Generation 291 Herbertsville Rd, Brick 08724
2809 Route 88 Point Pleasant, NJ 08742
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Skydiving in Paradise by Jordan Noe
So you have probably wondered what it would be like to jump out of a perfectly good airplane and rush towards the ground at 120 mph, right? Okay maybe we’re not alike, but work with me here because I went ahead and did all the footwork for 08742 Living and have returned to give you the scoop. You might be surprised to hear that there are a number of skydiving businesses in NJ and one, Skydive East Coast, forty minutes south of Point Boro. The dropzone is located just across Barnegat Bay from Long Beach Island which provides you with beautiful views on the plane ride up to 10,000 feet and the parachute ride down.
After you are clear of the plane your instructor has you assume an aerodynamically stable body position, arms and legs spread out evenly as if you are falling into bed after a long day. Then you enjoy the sunshine and speed of acceleration to freefall. You begin to become accustomed to the sensation of the sea air rushing around you, at how small everything is from that height, remembering how beautiful the shoreline can be. You can see all the little islands right in our backyard, a thousand and more inlets look like hairline fractures in the sand, and the early morning sunlight shimmers off the threads of water that marry the shoreline. Before you know it and before you are ready the ride is over. My instructor pulled the chute then pointed out landmarks to me on the way down. Atlantic city to the south, LBI just in front of us, the airport to which we were returning. After a little swooping action with the parachute controls we were above the airport. The impact, such as it was, was no harder than stepping off a bus. All told it was a little day adventure of two, maybe three hours. These skydiving businesses make everything very easy. Just call and make an appointment and after a short orientation and a waiver (you knew that was coming) it’s just a short trip to a fall through the sea air.
The jump itself is exhilarating. No rollercoater can prepare you for the acceleration you experience from your first ten seconds out of the plane and I can promise it will take your breath away. After the fifteen minute plane ride to reach altitude you are strapped to your tandem instructor and you make your way to the edge of the plane door. Once you lean out of the plane with 10,000 feet looming below you your instructor guides you out of the plane. The exit can only be described as a somersault, for which I was not mentally prepared, but that only served to add to the thrill.
September 2015
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Christy Schmidt Dr. Christy Schmidt is the owner of Ansuz, LLC and the creator of the ASpire MethodTM, a science-based selfimprovement system. She is a professor and instructor with over a quarter-century of experience working with clients to achieve remarkable success. She is also a Certified Strategic Interventionist, a Certified Chakra Therapist, a trained Hypnotherapist, a Certified Keirsey Temperament counselor, a trained mediation instructor and a yoga enthusiast, as well as an artist, published author and animal rescue advocate.
will present the following workshops: Happiness Path Saturday, October 17 and Sunday, October 18 (9am-4pm) $175 per person
Intro to Chakras
Floodgates: Intuition Saturday, October 3 and Sunday, October 4 (9am-4pm) $175 per person
Peace & Calming Sunday, September 13 (10am-1pm) Saturday, November 14 (10am – 1pm) $45 per person / 2 for $80
Register through Ansuz, LLC, via email at askansuz@gmail.com or call (732) 903-7884 for more information.
September 2015
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Saturday, September 19 (10am-1pm) Sunday, November 8 (10am-1pm) Saturday, December 5 (1pm-4pm) Friday, January 8 (7pm-10pm) $45 per person / 2 for $80
All events held at Truce Yoga Studio. 1171 Fischer Boulevard, Unit 3 Toms River, NJ 08753
15
Beer Corner For the Love of Beer — Oktoberfest by Matt Connelly
Each September, as the summer cools and pennant races heat up, I’m inevitably caught off guard by the early introduction of Oktoberfest lagers at our local craft beer shops. Although it may seem counter-intuitive to consume these beers prior to the month of “Oktober,” this historical German beer was originally brewed to be consumed in late September as part of the Munich festival commemorating the beginning of the German brewing season. Oktoberfest beers were traditionally brewed in March and fermented at cool temperatures in lagering caves throughout the summer. The process creates an amber-colored and malt-forward lager that is a perfect complement to a late September evening. The “official” Oktoberfest in Munich only serves beers from six Munich breweries that strictly follow the German Beer Purity Law (a.k.a. Reinheitsgebot). The Hacker-Pschorr Oktoberfest-Marzen and the Paulaner Oktoberfest-Marzen are the best of these Munich products and are readily available locally. If you’re looking for exceptional domestic versions of the style, go to Gerard’s Wine and Spirits in Point Pleasant and pick up a 6-pack of the Great Lakes Oktoberfest or the Samuel Adams Oktoberfest (or both). With notes of bread and toffee, these malty, toasted lagers won’t disappoint. As the most profitable quarter of the seasonal craft beer industry, the Fall no longer begins and ends with Oktoberfest. In recent years pumpkin-flavored brews have saturated the market but, unlike their Marzen counterparts, the taste and quality can vary dramatically. Brewing with pumpkin is not a new practice. Colonial brewers lacking access to imported malted barley used domestic fermentables such as pumpkin and molasses to expedite the brewing process. Due to the broad flavor spectrum of modern pumpkin beers, unassuming consumers may find themselves at the wrong end of an undrinkable pint. Although you may enjoy the uber-sweet and -spiced variations of this style, I prefer the dry and subtle approach. My favorites are the Shlafly Pumpkin Ale and Dogfish Head Punkin – both are brown ales brewed with subtle, but not overwhelming, hints of pumpkin and brown sugar. If you’re looking for something a bit more pronounced, try the Southern Tier Imperial Pumpking, with pronounced flavors of ginger, cinnamon, nutmeg and vanilla, or the Weyerbacher Imperial Pumkin, a spicy ale with notes of caramel, nutmeg and brown sugar. All four of these beers, along with dozens of other fall beer selections, can be found at the Spirits Unlimited in Point Beach. Enjoy!
September 2015
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By making a six-month commitment to 08742 Living, we will increase your distribution EVERY month. Not only will you get 1000 homes between our home delivery and subscribers, but, you will also get your ad posted as a feature one week per month, every month, for six months at facebook.com/08742living. Your ad will hit a minimum of 2000 additional people, every month in 08742, only. More customers....from right down the street! 1/8 page ad $149 per month
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Featured Business of the Month
732.714.1786 • Point Pleasant, NJ cleancutlccorp@aol.com By Steve De Jacimo
The Falabella’s were one of our first advertisers to come onboard with the magazine. Their company, Clean Cut Lawn Care, has been doing business in our area for 15 years. A trusted lawn care company. I sat down with Liz Falabella to discuss what makes Clean Cut successful.
What made you take the leap into starting your own business?
Liz-“Len started with two lawnmowers and used to squeeze in mowing jobs during the day because he worked nights back in the late nineties. By 2000, he made the decision to do it full time. It took a couple years for it to really gel.”
What affects the business the most? Liz- “The weather. We don’t cut lawns when it is wet. Some companies do. Plus, when it’s too rainy, you get a lot of crab grass. You might see us out there when it is drizzling, but that’s about as far as we get. Because of that, it just backs us up.”
After the recent economic slowdown, has it made it easier or tougher to keep employees? “It’s actually tougher. They are hard to find. Although, we have had some employees since day one, but, every year is a challenge. Most of our college students go back to school at this time of the year. Plus, it’s a tough job, long hours, grueling work and add hot weather and it is certainly not for everyone.”
How many lawns is an average week? Liz- “400.”
What do you do that your competition doesn’t? Liz- “Len is a people person. He cares about his customers…all of them. He pays attention to his client’s property even when he isn’t doing work onsite. He helps them out. He takes the extra time and talks to everyone.”
September 2015
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Shore Recipes September means it’s time for quick, easy and nutritious, but I’m growing weary of grilling. This tasty recipe goes together in minutes, and the whole family loves it. Precook the rice or grain if you are really crunched for time and you can add a little Siracha if you like your meals with an added kick.
Asian Lettuce Wraps
20 oz of lean ground turkey 20 oz. bag frozen chopped broccoli 1 medium onion chopped 4 cloves minced garlic 3 TBSP sesame seeds 1 ½ TBSP fresh grated ginger Ground black pepper to taste 3 cups cooked brown rice (or switch out your favorite grain) ⅓ cup low sodium soy sauce In a large skillet brown ground turkey over medium heat in a tbsp of oil. Add, onion, garlic, ginger, soy sauce, sesame seeds and pepper. Reduce heat and add broccoli. Cook for 57 minutes until heated through.
Sauce — In a microwavable bowl mix together:
1 ½ TBSP Red Hot Sauce ½ cup creamy peanut butter 1 tsp white vinegar 1 ½ TBSP soy sauce 2-3 TBSP water 1 ½ TBSP brown sugar Microwave for 15 seconds at a time until peanut butter is melted and sauce can be mixed smooth. Wash and dry your favorite lettuce leaves. Layer rice, meat mixture and drizzle with sauce. Optional: Sprinkle chopped scallions and peanuts over the top of each wrap. Enjoy!
Escape to the Jersey Shore
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10
Lisa L. Colonno, Assistant Vice President, Branch Manager 2307 Lakewood Road, Point Pleasant, NJ 08742 732.295.0004 • lcolonno@manasquanbank.com September 2015
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September 2015
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Time to winterize your pool! We have everything needed to close your pool in our store. Don’t want to do it yourself? Contact us to reserve a Closing date and we’ll do it for you!
September 2015
732-295-5551
3101 Bridge Ave., Point Pleasant, NJ
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21
Parental Guidance Hush Hush By Maureen Whelan
I know I’m not alone when I look forward to 08742 in September. It’s my favorite time to enjoy downtown Point Beach and the beaches in BayHead. Kids can ride bikes with less worry, parking is no longer an issue, and I recognize most of the faces I see. Most of all, I can gaze at the unobstructed ocean views, and the sounds of the waves are louder than the conversations around me. I breathe, and relax...quiet at last!
“It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and
remove all doubt.” — Mark Twain
Quiet. Not to be misconstrued as shy or antisocial. But simply quiet. It’s a quality rarely promoted or given great accolades, but I am left pondering why? Why is the boisterous, outspoken child, praised for “always participating in class” even if he or she has nothing significant to say? Yet, the quiet child, who may also be perceived as shy, anxious, or socially immature, is overlooked when praise is being dealt. I am a parent to both these types, and at times, am living in a house of conflict, as my outgoing child is craving activity and interaction and my quiet child is retreating to the bedroom for some alone time. Neither is antisocial, however my quiet child has learned that in order to recharge for the next day of school, to be able to face the sea of peers in class and after school activities, to be able to successfully function in this socially demanding environment, quiet time is a must. This summer I read an incredible book that gave me insight into my own children, and so many children I work with. “Quiet”, by Susan Cain is a must read for any parent who believes the child they are raising is wired a bit differently than they are. Her message is not one that is prointrovert or proextrovert, but she enlightens her readers so that they find value in both. It’s hard to argue with her. One, she is an attorney and backs each of her statements with a boat load of evidence, from behavioral studies, MRI’s, corporate ideals, to educational, religious and philosophical frameworks. And two, the case studies she shares are so common, the reader can easily connect similarities to someone in their own life. The reality is, the early years of life, are often more difficult for the quiet child. Society places a higher value the traits of social savvy extroverts, while introverts who are shy, are often perceived as awkward. In this world of social media excess, kids and young adults are encouraged to put it all out there. Score boards reflect how many people saw the post, liked it and what was said. It just may be the megalomaniac starter kit. But what is really being said? When the body is so busy talking and acting, there is little time for the brain to process. Look for the quiet people in your life… everyone knows one. Seek them out and you’ll find that by being quiet, they have observed the world in amazing detail. Their quiet time has allowed them to observe behaviors of those around them. They will work to promote peace and order in their life, and somewhere, they have a treasure trove of secret writings, artwork, music or amazing ideas they are working on. Quiet can be brilliant.
“The monotony and solitude of a quiet life stimulates the creative mind.” — Albert Einstein
September 2015
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EST. 1982
September 2015
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You Go Girl Why Not Now? by Katherine Kehoe
Usually December and January are full of “New Year, New You” advertisements. When those months roll around, we’ll see messages everywhere telling us that we should lose some weight, reorganize our lives, eat healthier, spend more time with family, or all sorts of other things that are guaranteed to make us happier and better people. Yes, those advertisements are loaded with idealism and all the stresses and pressures that are sewn into its seams. Yes, this can be a very negative theme for some people – especially us women. We all have things we want to change or improve about ourselves, but we lose them in the mess of all the things we’re told we should change. We forget the things we actually want to change for ourselves. So here is my question: Why wait until December to decide on a New Years’ resolution? September is a time of growth and change, too. Grade-school kids are headed into a new year of school. College semesters are beginning and young adults are moving to new places. Fall will be here in a few weeks, and the weather will get colder and all the leaves will turn to beautiful shades of orange and red. Who says you can’t decide that you want to make a positive change, too? You can find reasons any time of the year. So why not now?
(What Lawyers Do — Your “Little” Questions Answered, Continued)
This illustration should help you better understand how a lawyer’s mind works – and why an experienced, competent attorney is worth much more than the fee they charge. What you say:
What the attorney hears:
I would like a simple will...
It may be hectic in the households with children as everyone gets ready for this new year of school. But as far as media messages to moms, wives, girlfriends, women, it’s relatively quiet. Now is a perfect opportunity to sit down and consider what changes would make you feel better. I’m not talking about losing ten pounds because all the celebrities are so thin, but losing ten pounds so you can fit in your favorite jeans and feel more confident. I don’t mean buying the latest products to organize your home so it can look like a magazine color, but examining what you have and buying what you actually want or need to make your life easier. Maybe look at your schedule and see where you can fit in time to go to the gym or do some yoga. Maybe wake up a little earlier and read a book or see the sunrise. Maybe look inward and decide if there are aspects of your personality you’d like to change. Maybe you want to be more assertive at work. Maybe you want to communicate better with your husband. Maybe you want to take a class that’s always interested you. The possibilities are endless. The point is that you can make any sort of change any time you want. Most of us just don’t consider our freedom until it’s brought to our attention around the holidays by all those advertisements. Well, here you go. I’ve brought it to your attention. Why not now? Where is his or her most recent Last Will?, Federal Tax liability?, State Inheritance Tax liability?, Is there duress or undue influence on this client?, Is the client competent?, GST – Generation Skipping Tax, Special Needs child or grandchild, Healthcare Proxy, Advance Directive, HIPPA, Health Concerns, Medicaid issues, Disowned child, Adopted child, Spendthrift spouse or child, Joint interests, Investments, Like-kind property exchange, Poor earlier legal advice, Citizenship, Domicile / residency, Prenuptual agreements, Bad CDs, Bad annuities, POA – control, Age, Medicare, Relationships, Marriage, Domestic Partnership, Step children, Liquidity of the estate, Change of residence, Changes in real estate market, Changes in estate tax, Changes in income tax, Ethical conflicts, Pensions, Beneficiary designations, Retirement plans, Ownership rights, Timing, Medicaid transfers, Gifts, Gift tax, Outside state property, Ancillary probate, Non-citizen beneficiaries, Post-retirement planning, Business succession planning, Business character of ownership, Joint interests, Too much or too little life insurance, Long-term illness, Long-term illness and health insurance, Missing stock certificates, Ancient stock certificates, Appreciated assets, Appreciated art, Insurance risks, Lawsuits, Personal property, Property outside the state, Illiquid and liquid property, Business ownership or interest, Exes and divorces, Children of a prior marriage, Children of one’s spouse, Inheritances, Friends...
This type of thinking is why lawyers seem “lost” in their heads much of the time…and why they seem to ask things you may think are inconsequential. Find a lawyer you trust – and one that is experienced in the area in which you are hiring him or her. A great lawyer really is invaluable. Christy A. Schmidt, Esq. is a local attorney and business consultant focusing on business, real estate and estate law. See more at: www.cschmidtlaw.com. Contact her office for special “back to school” family estate plans. September 2015
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Students of 08742 Point Beach Teams Ready for Fall Season by Emily Foster
Autumn is a great season for Point Pleasant Beach High School. All students and teachers are gearing up to return on September 9th, while student athletes in have already begun to prepare for this year’s fall sports season, which showcases the football, cross-country, soccer, cheerleading, tennis, and volleyball teams. Parent-run organizations, such as the PTO and Boosters, are also starting to recruit for this year’s fundraisers, to support senior scholarships, athletics gear, and fun and festive events, including Spirit Week and Project Graduation. Despite the heat of summer, the fall season is already in motion. Most teams began to meet for practice in late July, hoping to get a head start on prepping for this year’s round of meets, matches, and games, spanning through September, October, and November. Victoria Cartagena, cheerleader for Point Beach, says that summer practices contribute significantly to the squad’s performance during the school year, stating, “By having all the cheers and dances memorized early, we are able to put on an eye-catching show that runs almost seamlessly.” Although summer cheer practices tend to run longer, cheerleaders appreciate that Coach June works a flexible schedule, allowing time for these busy students to get to work, and, in Victoria’s case, attend band camp during early August.
Similarly, tennis and volleyball practices began in mid-to-late July of this year. Tennis players often go on to extend their practice time by attending tennis camp, run by Coach Pellerito in the weeks leading up to the official team’s practices. Junior Varsity tennis player Jillian Guzik says that while fall practices are more relaxed, “they start later, which means that you’re playing longer… it’s interrupting more of the time [in which] you do school work.” Both Jillian and teammate Joey Shraeger hope for a good season and lots of wins for Point Beach (as well as some new uniforms for games). Volleyball player Savannah Costa’s team began practicing only on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but has since upped their practices count as the beginning of school, and this year’s round of games, draws near. “We begin around early July… in late August, [practice] has been every single week day, Monday to Friday,” Savannah informs; while this much practice may seem intense, she acknowledges that summer practices gives fall sports an advantage that winter and spring sports don’t have. Want to get involved in Beach athletics? Parents who wish to be a part of the Booster Association – which fundraises for athletic programs and scholarships for student athletes – can get involved by volunteering at various events such as the Snack Stand and raffle sales. For anyone looking to show their support and get ahold of some Point Beach hoodies and gear, the Beach PTO sells “Beach Spirit Wear” during football games and around Christmas. PTO President Tracey Jackson welcomes all prospective PTO members to sign up and help out, advising, “To really get involved, you can attend meetings… at Back to School Night, we have all the sign up sheets at our table.” For anyone who missed out on going to Freshman Orientation and Back to School Night, sign up sheets are found on the PTO’s website. From 08742 Living, good luck to all fall sports players, JV and Varsity, for this year’s season – it’s sure to be a great one!
September 2015
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Catholic Community of
SAINT PETER
406 Foreman Avenue Point Pleasant Beach, NJ 08742 (732) 892-0049 Pastor: Rev. Robert Benko, OFM Conv.
Weekend Mass Schedule Saturday Vigil Mass: 5:00pm Sunday: 7:30, 9:00, 10:30am and 12:00pm
All Are Welcome!
Mueller’s Bakery A full line, old fashioned bakery since 1890!
Cakes • Bread • Donuts • Danish Bagels • Rolls • Pastries • Cookies • Wedding Cakes Cupcakes • Crumb Cake • Special Occasion Cakes Stop in for our Famous Crumb Cake!
80 Bridge Avenue Bay Head, NJ 08742 732.892.0442 www.muellersbakery.com
Where Quality Makes the Difference!
September 2015
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N ov em be r 0 26 2 9 1 r e b m e T c h a e n k s g D i v i n g e h T D s a i n w n e r T e r o f e Night B s and a m t 1 s u 3 r h r C e b o t c h t i w O t s a f k a Bre ta n e e w o l l a H San e d a r e u q s Ma 8 pm
October 31 - Halloween Masquerade will be from 8pm - 1am. Join us for a hootin’ and hollerin’ night!
November 26 - Arugula at The White Sands will offer a sit down style Thanksgiving meal for all.
December 19&20 - On December 19 Mrs. Claus will be here to serve milk and cookies, arts and crafts, help write letters to Santa, and read a bed time story. On December 20, Santa will join everyone for breakfast!
*PLEASE CALL FOR AVAILABILITY AND PACKAGE INFORMATION* 1205 Ocean Ave | Point Pleasant Beach | NJ | 08742 732.899.3370 | www.thewhitesands.com | info@thewhitesands.com