3rd Act Magazine – Fall 2022

PUGET SOUND

Going for Gold

Age Doesn’t Hold Back Madonna Hanna

Grow Your Risk Muscles Challenge Your Comfort Zone to Expand and Enrich Your Life

UKRAINE RITE OF PASSAGE A Bomb Shelter Birthday

LATE-LIFE LOVE Issues to Consider

NO PASSPORT REQUIRED Discover the Unfamiliar Nearby

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MESSAGE from the publisher

Just Do It! “As long as we’re green, we’re growing.”

—Doris Carnevali, 100-year-old blogger On June 13, David and I set out in a 40 ft. sailboat for Desolation Sound—a remote and spectacularly beautiful area of fjords, islands, and inlets of the Salish Sea off the coast of British Columbia.

I am a novice sailor, having only tried sailboarding in my 20s and a little day-sailing close to shore. David sailed extensively prior to our marriage, but has not sailed much in 20 years.

Yet, here we were, off on a big—and hopefully not foolhardy—adventure.

To say I was green (literally on one occasion) is an understatement. To say I learned and grew through the experience is absolute. It was a remarkable journey and well worth the risk.

How often do you challenge your comfort zone boundaries? Do you tell yourself that you’re too old to do certain things, or subscribe to that old and untrue adage, “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks?” Poppycock! Age has nothing to

do with it. Health—at any age—certainly does. But mostly it’s our willingness to be a beginner, to risk looking silly, to try and practice something new, to risk failure, and challenge our fears. It’s about reaching for life at every stage of life and ability.

In t his issue our contributors challenge us to expand our comfort zones, test boundaries, and grow. And when it comes to challenging boundaries, no one does it better than Madonna Hanna. In our cover story “The Seed of Speed (Page 34),” Ann Hedreen writes that while Hanna is a track record breaker, her “core mission is to motivate all of us to believe that anything is possible.”

We explore risk in many forms—in love, in travel, in creative endeavors, and risk thrust upon us. In “A Ukraine Rite of Passage (Page 24),” Seattle native David Freeman writes about he and his wife’s escape from Kyiv during the early days of the war.

Life is not without risk, change, or loss. Even if you just sit in your armchair. So, why not reach for the gold, live a little larger, and add a little adventure to your life? As Nike famously says, “Just Do It!”

How often do you challenge your comfort zone boundaries?

OU R VI SI ON Now, more than ever, older adults are viewing their retirement as a “Third Act” in their lives: A time for reinvention, connection, and engagement. 3rd Act Magazine is a bold, fresh, lifestyle magazine for older adults in the Puget Sound region. Our stories and articles challenge the worn-out perceptions of aging and offer a dynamic new vision: Let’s celebrate and embrace this stage of life, and age together with confidence.

PU B LI SH E RS Victoria Starr Marshall David Marshall EDITOR Victoria Starr Marshall COPY EDITOR Tina Potterf ART DIRECTOR Philip Krayna WEBSITE Philip Krayna ADVERTISING Dale Bohm DISTRIBUTION & CIRCULATION David Marshall COVER PHOTO Ernie Sapiro 3rd Act Magazine wants to hear from you!

Email your comments, ideas, and questions to info@3rdActMag.com or mail to P.O. Box 412, Brinnon, WA 98320 3rd Act Magazine is published quarterly by Oshi Publishing, LLC. The opinions, advice, or statements expressed by contributing writers do not reflect those of the editors, the publishers, or 3rd Act Magazine.

Copyright ©2022 Oshi Publishing, LLC. All rights reserved.

Oshi Publishing, LLC, P.O. Box 412 Brinnon, WA 98320 · 360-796-4837 Email: info@3rdActMag.com

Crossing the Strait of Juan de Fuca

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P.S. David and I invite you to join us on our next adventure to Costa Rica.

See page 57 for details.

For subscriptions, advertising rates, and additional information, visit us at www.3rdActMag.com.

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Find connection and joy IN EVERYDAY LIVING

SENIOR LIVING THAT ENRICHES YOUR MIND, BODY, AND SPIRIT Era Living retirement communities help you stay engaged and connected—while covering the cooking, cleaning, maintenance, and more. Featuring intellectually rich activities, exquisite dining with healthy choices at every meal, inclusive exercise classes, meticulously landscaped gardens, beautiful common spaces with rotating original art, and the supportive services you need to thrive in place as your circumstances change.

Visit eraliving.com/joy to learn more.

Aging with Confidence

Locations in Seattle, Mercer Island, Renton, Bellevue & Issaquah

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PUGET SOUND

Age Doesn’t Hold Back Madonna Hanna

My unforgettable 66th birthday in Kyiv, Ukraine.

DAVID FREEMAN

Grow Your Risk Muscles Challenge Your Comfort Zone to Expand and Enrich Your Life

A Bomb Shelter Birthday

LATE-LIFE LOVE Issues to Consider

NO PASSPORT REQUIRED Discover the Unfamiliar Nearby

COVER: Madonna Hanna didn’t start running until age 57. Her Senior Games gold medals tell the story of her dedication and perseverance. According to Hanna, you can do anything if you put your mind to it and are willing to do the work.

Photo by Ernie Sapiro

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contents FEATURES 24 A UKRAINE RITE OF PASSAGE

Going for Gold

UKRAINE RITE OF PASSAGE

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28 R EACH FOR LIFE AND REAP REWARDS FOR BEING BRAVE Are you willing to grow your risk muscles for a richer life?

DORI GILLAM

30 LOVE, RISK AND RESOLUTION Older adults in love face different challenges.

PRISCILLA CHARLIE HINCKLEY

32 E XPRESS MORE OF YOU CREATIVELY? YES YOU CAN! How to quiet your inner critic and express a more creative you.

SALLY FOX

34 M ADONNA HANNA: THE SEED OF SPEED Age is not slowing Madonna Hanna down.

She’s breaking records and taking names.

ANN HEDREEN

50 N O PASSPORT REQUIRED Opportunities to expand your horizons are closer than you think.

JEANETTE LEARDI

COLUMNS 8 AGING WITH INTENTION To risk or not to risk.

LINDA HENRY

12 E NLIGHTENED AGING Roger Angell has a few things to say about aging.

DR. ERIC B. LARSON

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18 14 M IND THE SPIRIT If not on earth, in heaven. Solace for missed experiences.

STEPHEN SINCLAIR

18 B RAIN POWER Psilocybin travels to the antipodes of the mind.

MICHAEL C. PATTERSON

22 O N THE LIGHTER SIDE Treasure hunting and the allure of a garage sale.

ANNIE CULVER

44 TRAVEL RECONSIDERED Singing the praises of staying put.

HOLLIS GIAMMATTEO

46 THE RELUCTANT TRAVELER The push of adventure, the pull of safety.

DON AKCHIN

48 D ISCOVER NORTHWEST The Cape Flattery Tribal Scenic Byway.

ANN RANDALL

58 O N THE TOWN Indoor theater returns around the Sound.

MISHA BERSON

LIFESTYLE 40 MY THIRD ACT Navigating the country of old age.

PRISCILLA LONG

42 TRAVEL DURING TURBULENT TIMES Staying flexible is more important than ever.

ANN RANDALL

Aging with Confidence

WELLNESS 10 T HE VIEW FROM HERE Using gravity to slow and reverse aging.

JOAN VERNIKOS, PhD

37 K EEP MOVING

Strength training and the triumphs of endurance.

MIKE HARMS

38 TAKE A RIDE WITH THE PEOPLE WHO PADDLE

Dragon Boat paddling is an easy entry-level sport for all ages and fitness levels.

CONNIE MCDOUGALL

53 E VERY WALK A DISCOVERY How to deepen the experience of this simple exercise.

JANICE KING

54 N OURISH YOUR BODY Explorations in umami— the deep taste.

REBECCA CRICHTON

IN EVERY ISSUE 62 BOOKS

Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole

by Susan Cain REVIEWED BY ANN HEDREEN

64 B RAIN GAMES

Challenge yourself with these word puzzles.

NANCY LINDE

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LETTERS Pleasurable Read I’ve spent the morning reading your latest (Summer 2022) issue of 3rd Act Magazine with intense pleasure. I was so impressed reading all the articles that I went online and subscribed for two years. I look forward to being one of your most avid readers!

—Chris Palmer, Bethesda, MD

What God Got Wrong Great article (“Losing Oshi,” Spring 2022) on the joy and sorrow of losing your beloved fur buddy. I have a simple expression I use when referring to my tricolor Aussie, Oliver, now 11-1/2: “One thing God got wrong is that he makes our pets expire before we do.”

I don’t look forward to that.

smart, sensible, well-written articles, and, needless to say, I appreciate the discussion of social issues. We olders have such an important role to play, which many aging-oriented websites and publications ignore. See my tweet quoting the latest issue of Paul Kleyman’s excellent newsletter for journalists who cover the “age beat:” “If leading groups in aging, notably @ AARP, illuminated the human turmoil of abortion, mass shootings and other societal tsunamis…[it] might underscore the goals that these organizations love to tout with the slogan, ’Reframing Aging.’”

Keep up your good work.

—Ashton Applewhite, Brooklyn, NY

—Chris Palmer, Bethesda, MD

Jennifer James Fans

Sensible Social Responsibility

My husband and I have been fans of Jennifer James for at least 40 yrs. We attended many talks she gave, read her books, followed her advice. The article

Just a short note to say I think you’re doing a great job with 3rd Act. The latest issue (Summer 2022) is packed with

she wrote this month (“The Power of Cultural Beliefs,” Summer 2022) is one of her best. We read, we wept, then reread.

Her words pierced my heart. She used to speak of “the death rattle.” Over the years we have listened for it. I wonder where it is now. Thank you for continuing to publish her thoughts to challenge my mind and my beliefs.

—Tamara Buchanan & Doug Benoliel, Lopez Island, WA

talk to us!

by mail: 3rd Act Magazine, P.O. Box 412, Brinnon, WA 98320 by email: info@3rdActMag.com Please include your name, city, state, and phone number when possible. Letters may be edited for length and clarity.

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3rd Act magazine | fall 2022

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Fraud Prevention

Tip-Offs to Rip-Offs

How Washington consumers can spot cons before they spot you The numbers are in, and they’re headed in the wrong direction. According to new statistics from the Federal Trade Commission, Washington consumers lost more than $135 million to fraud in 2021, nearly double the amount lost in 2020.

It seems the scammers are gaining the upper hand in the fight for our hard-earned dollars. Con-artists are becoming ever more sophisticated in their tactics, and new scams are emerging at an increasing pace. Even the most informed consumer can find themselves struggling to keep up.

To help consumers fight back, AARP is joining forces with the Washington State Attorney General’s Office, BECU and Nomorobo to hold a free “Tip-Offs to Rip-Offs” online event aimed at helping Washington consumers stay a step ahead of the scammers.

Attend this free online event on September 14. Participants will hear about the latest scams targeting Vancouver area residents, including a journey inside an actual fraudulent boiler room to show step by step how scammers manipulate our emotions and steal our money.

Through a unique new partnership with the call-blocking service Nomorobo, participants will also learn how they can gain realtime access to the specific robocall scams flooding Vancouver area homes. With these and other early warning tools, consumers will gain the inside track on recognizing some of the newest scams before the cons have a chance to make their pitch.

The events are free, but registration is required at aarp.org/WashingtonTipOffs. You do not need to be an AARP member to join in.

Tip-Offs to Rip-Offs FREE online event Wednesday, September 14, 2022 | 7 – 8:30 p.m.

Registration is required at aarp.org/WashingtonTipOffs Presented by:

Aging with Confidence

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AGING WITH INTENTION

To Risk or Not to Risk…

BY LINDA HENRY

Linda Henry writes regularly on topics related to aging, health care, and communication, and is the coauthor of several books, including Transformational Eldercare from the Inside Out: Strengths-Based Strategies for Caring. She conducts workshops nationally on aging and creating caring work environments. Her volunteer emphasis is age-friendly communities.

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I recall visiting an amusement park as a child that featured two roller coasters—one of adult size and a smaller one intended for younger riders.

I so envied the kids who were having such fun.

I really wanted to join them, but at the same time, I was scared to do so. After much angst and self talk (“You can do it!”), I finally climbed into the seat and the cars began to move, at first slowly, and then faster and faster, up and down and around. I was terrified, so much so that they had to stop the ride to let me off. To this day, I avoid taking physical risks, although I am not reluctant to undertake a task I have never done before.

Life can be risky. According to Princeton University psychologist Elke Weber, there are five areas in which we have a risk-taking tendency: financial, health/safety, recreational, ethical, and social. She argues that we have innate risk thresholds in each area partially depending on our values or how much we think we will benefit from the activity.

While age may affect our willingness to take

3rd Act magazine | fall 2022

chances, it is not the only metric. Examining risk-taking and age is more complicated than comparing young people being bold and adventurous and older individuals being more cautious, states Gregory Russell SamanezLarkin, Assistant Professor of Psychology at Yale University, and co-author of a recent study examining risk-taking and age. Research suggests that while risk-taking behaviors are more likely to change during early and late periods of life, significant biological and cognitive changes, plus major life events such as marriage and retirement, affect our inclination to take chances.

Most of us do not think about the implications of the behavioral decisions we make. To discover how inclined you are to taking chances, reflect on a few of the risk-taking areas identified by Weber and decide how likely you are to make risky choices.

For example, consider the long-term consequences of the decisions we make that impact our health and safety. Data indicates that when we maintain a relationship with a health care provider and follow wellness screening and vaccination guidelines, we are more likely to remain healthy as we age. On the other hand, those of us who choose to disregard or delay such recommendations face greater health risks. We jeopardize our safety when we talk on a handheld cell phone while driving, speed, choose not to wear a seatbelt or life vest, or engage in activities that are increasingly hazardous as we age such as climbing tall ladders and cleaning gutters.

Sometimes the benefits of an action justify a higher risk. Some individuals may be reluctant to join a group because they fear not being accepted. Yet, the desire to belong may outweigh their hesitancy.

Hopefully, you have gained a better understanding of how willing you are to take chances—or take risks. To risk or not to risk is the question.

You decide.

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THE VIEW FROM HERE

G–AGING Play with gravity to stay young in body and at heart

BY JOAN VERNIKOS, PHD

Almost 88, I wonder how aging seems to have passed me by. What I mean is that I have not had time to think about aging. I retired from NASA in 2000, but my to-do list is longer, not shorter. The talk I give about the effects of gravity on the body— received with polite appreciation 25 years ago—is applauded with enthusiasm when I speak today. In my case, there really has been no retirement and I love it, nor do I expect to retire any time soon.

There is so much to do, so much to learn, so much to share.

My father was 60 when I was born. A doctor before there were CT-scans or MRIs and only limited lab tests, diagnosis depended on examining the patient with his hands, taking their temperature, and looking at them from top to bottom. He specialized in infectious diseases— pain, redness, coughing, temperature, and vomiting were basic symptoms. Antibiotics and vaccines introduced during World War II for polio, typhoid, and cholera kept some of the most serious diseases and infections under control.

My older sister (who later became a pediatrician) and I “apprenticed” in medicine at the dinner table each evening as the day’s cases were

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discussed. It was there I developed my curiosity and problem-solving capabilities. When my sister went to medical school my dinner table education expanded even more, not to mention her delight in diagnosing me with the sickness discussed in class that day.

There was no question in our parents’ minds about what we aspired to when we grew up. Surely, we would both follow in father’s footsteps in his clinic. But this was the 1950s and girls did not become professionals. Schoolmates headed to secretarial or translator careers.

Always the rebel, I backed off medicine the first day I walked through the smelly anatomy class.

My sister registered me for pharmacy, hoping I would revert to medicine one day. Four years later, as things were getting politically unstable in Egypt, I went to London University for a “better” qualification.

With a PhD in Pharmacology and a young husband who needed support, we headed to America to teach at The Ohio State University.

It’s there I pursued my research on stress. As luck would have it, the Professor of Physiology was setting off to California to form the first Biomedical

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and Biological Sciences in a new NASA. He recruited five scientists to get started, including me for my stress expertise. With two very young kids in tow we set out for NASA’s Ames Research Center. Had I planned any of this? Hardly! And so began my journey into Space Medicine and Aging barely three years after a human was launched into orbit!

Engineers designed spacecraft to defy the pull of Earth’s gravity, to reach Earth orbit, and circle Earth in microgravity. Then re-enter Earth’s atmosphere and land in the Pacific Ocean. In order to study what happens to the human body away from Earth’s gravity (G), ways of mimicking a reduced G environment had to be found. Sitting in the buoyancy of water was one way to reduce the normal pull of G on the body, but hours in water is not healthy. A better simulation model was provided by lying in bed continuously.

When you stand, gravity pulls in one direction only, downward from head to toe. When lying down gravity pulls across the chest, minimizing its influence. Studying healthy, active men and women confined to bed continuously, I noticed the resulting changes were remarkably like those of aging: muscle and bone atrophy, balance and coordination problems, and much more. We now

know that not only in bed but in actual space flight, aging changes develop 10 times faster than they normally do as we age on Earth. The similarities are substantial.

Whether we like it or not, we are born on Earth surrounded by Earth’s gravity, 1G pulling straight down. As babies we push against gravity to stand up. It became clear to me that gravity is the stimulus we use to grow and develop. Stop using it, become too sedentary, we stop growing and start wasting. On Earth we are evolved to use G to grow and stay healthy. We call the changes aging because they look like those that happen naturally as we age.

Gravity is the stimulus we use to grow and develop.

The more we move, the more we play with the forces of gravity and the slower we age.

The less we move, the less we use G, the faster we age. The more we move, the more we play with the forces of gravity, the slower we “age” and the later we “age.” There is no magic, just common sense.

And then we keep having fun, loving life and doing what we love, grateful for all the friends and things this life brings us.

JOAN VERNIKOS, PHD, born to Greek parents in Alexandria, Egypt, studied in London and taught at The Ohio State College of Medicine. She is a pioneering research scientist who conducted seminal studies in space medicine, inactivity physiology, stress, healthy aging, and making chocolate truffles.

Recruited by NASA in 1964 to study stress in astronauts, she later worked on ways to keep astronauts, including John Glenn, healthy in space and back to Earth’s gravity. Vernikos served as chief of the Life Sciences Division at NASA Ames Research Center in California, and director of NASA’s Life Sciences at its Washington, D.C., headquarters from 1993 to 2000. Winner of numerous scientific and leadership awards and a member of the International Academy of Astronautics, she was inducted into the International Astronautical Federation Hall of Fame in 2018, and received its top honor, the Emil Allen Award, in 2019.

Motivational speaker and an author, her books include The G-Connection: Harness Gravity & Reverse Aging, Adventures in Chocolate with her husband Geoffrey Hazzan, the groundbreaking Sitting Kills, Moving Heals, followed by Designed to Move and her latest, Stress Beyond 50. Her mission is to empower individuals to have greater control over their health and well-being through frequent daily movement, turning stress from foe to friend, and living a long life with a smile.

Aging with Confidence

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ENLIGHTENED AGING

Roger Angell: Resilience Personified

BY ERIC B. LARSON, MD, MPH

Eric B. Larson, MD, MPH, is the author, with Joan DeClaire, of Enlightened Aging.

He is the founding principal investigator of the Adult Changes in Thought (ACT) study, ongoing for about 30 years. ACT recently was awarded a $55.6 million expansion grant from the National Institutes of Health.

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Roger Angell died this past May at 101. A renowned essayist, Angell had a distinguished career as a writer and longstanding fiction editor at the New Yorker. He was best known as a sportswriter, especially for his keen insights on that great American pastime, baseball.

Yet, upon news of his death, the word “resilience” popped into my mind and I thought about the famous essay he wrote on aging for the New Yorker in February 2014 at age 93. Rereading “This Old Man,” I am convinced striving to build resilience—the theme of my book Enlightened Aging: Building Resilience—for a long, active life makes sense. But aging well over a long life also involves acceptance, equanimity, avoiding resentment, and viewing aging as a positive.

Angell says his biggest surprise was the need for deep attachment and intimate relationships as we age.

“This Old Man” begins with a laundry list of maladies and losses: Arthritis with painful, loose joints; macular degeneration; daily need for Tylenol for pain following shingles; arterial stents and a hole in his heart; back and knee deformities so he now resembles Geppetto.

Angell wrote he’d “endured a few knocks and missed worse,” then shared a long (and incomplete) list of friends, teachers, acquaintances, and others from his life who are now gone. Tragedies included the unexpected suicide of his daughter, Callie, and death of his second wife after 48 years of marriage.

Surviving what he called “long odds,” to reach 93, Angell’s grateful. “I’m not dead and not yet mindless,” he wrote. But Angell acknowledged

3rd Act magazine | fall 2022

that a downside of great age is the room it provides for rotten years and that “the accruing weight of the losses don’t bury us.”

He noted in the article at the time that he was still working and had stuff “I get excited or depressed about.” Angell especially recounted the value of friends and pleasant events, past and present, experienced over his remarkable 75 plus years of adult life.

Angell wrote about the constant need for more venery—more love, more romance, more sex. In the end he cited that getting to such an old age was the second biggest surprise of a long life. The first biggest surprise was an increasing need for deep attachment and intimate love.

The honesty of “This Old Man” certainly reflected Angell’s resilience. And I was struck at how he accepted aging with equanimity. He did not deny that aging brings losses and physical changes we would choose not to experience. He did not succumb to resentment. Instead, Angell accepted change and found a course—an ability to adjust that allows one to carry on in the face of adversity. I wonder if he was familiar with the “Serenity Prayer”: “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

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MIND THE SPIRIT

If Not on Earth, in Heaven

by Stephen Sinclair

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I didn’t start planning for retirement until well into middle age. For most of my life I’d been a performing artist and a spiritual seeker, so rarely had steady employment. It was only in my years as a pastor and chaplain that I finally had the ability to start putting money away for old age. Despite this, my present monthly income isn’t sufficient to enable me to travel or go on adventures. I know I’m not alone in this. We each walk our own path in life and often that path doesn’t include the accumulation of wealth.

Throughout my life I’ve been fortunate in that I’ve had the freedom to be adventurous without having to take others into account. I’ve hitchhiked around Europe, taught English and acted in Tokyo, lived in Cuba, visited dozens of countries throughout the world, and lived in many different states and cities in the United States.

In spite of this, I sometimes feel sadness knowing that some experiences will forever be out of my reach, that it’s just too late.

What gives me solace and provides me with a bit of serenity are truths found in one of the Christian texts and in the writings of a Persian Sufi poet.

In the Gospel of John, Jesus says to the disciple Thomas, “In my father’s house there are many dwelling places.”

I’d grown up thinking this was solely about going to heaven after death. It wasn’t until I was no longer working and found I didn’t have the means to leave home and have new experiences, that I truly came to understand this passage. The teacher is saying not to worry about having missed out on things in this life, because in the next life—in God’s house—there are all these places you can reside where you will experience everything that was out of reach in this life.

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Many forces and constructs keep people from doing and experiencing things they’d like to do. Class, gender, and racial discrimination, along with physical ability, can restrict what can be achieved or realized. The scripture is telling us that the dwelling places are the opportunities that will be made available to us to do, have, and see whatever we weren’t able to experience in this lifetime.

We’ll be able to fulfill the dream of an occupation we weren’t allowed to have. There will be mountains to climb and oceans to swim with strong youthful bodies. We’ll be able to feel what it is like to have a beloved and to parent a child. We’ll wander the world.

Whatever it is we need to feel complete will be provided.

The second text, from the mystic Hafez, reveals this: Inherent in most suffering, especially of the mind or heart, is feeling, is believing that you can miss something in life. But that is not true. For on your wedding day with the Sun, one of His presents to you will be—if you want it—every experience that has ever been

known or can be known. Yes, a divine treasury awaits each soul. It is the infinite, INFINITE possibilities that you can really borrow from at any moment right now.

This is even more astounding because it states upfront exactly what awaits you at the time of death! And not only do all these things await you, but knowing that you can, even now, while still in this existence, benefit from those things you will experience in the next life.

I’ve accepted the fact that I no longer have the means to travel or go on adventures. But I believe in the promises made to us by the teachers.

And knowing this, any feelings of loss or grief are dispelled.

Everything I may have missed out on in this life awaits me in the next.

Stephen Sinclair lives in Seattle’s Capitol Hill neighborhood. Earlier in his life he enjoyed a career in show business while working out of New York and Chicago.

A career as an ordained Unitarian Universalist parish minister and a hospital chaplain followed.

Most recently, he worked with the homeless, and is a weekly volunteer visitor at the Monroe Correctional Complex.

LAUREL COVE COMMUNITY

Improving the quality of life of the people we touch.

Live Your Best Life With Privacy and Dignity • Independent living • Assisted living • Memory care • Short-term respite care Call now to schedule a tour and learn more!

206-364-9336 LAUREL COVE COMMUNITY 17201 15th Ave NE Shoreline, WA 98155 encorecommunities.com

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• A strong sense of community, which helps with feelings of isolation, safety, and health • A full range of care (independent, assisted, and memory care), which enables people to remain in their home and not require a move during a difficult time • Opportunities for exercise and fun, which allows people to stay strong, healthy, and social • Scheduled transportation, which provides mobility and freedom • No stairs to navigate, which minimizes the risk of falls

IS IT TIME TO TAKE THE LEAP? Benefits Outweigh the Stress of Moving into Senior Living

BY SUE ROWELL

Risks, whether big or small, can be frightening. Whether you’re traveling to a foreign country or learning to ski, unfamiliar experiences bring up feelings of anxiety, excitement, worry, stress, and hope. Have you noticed that, once you get past those initial fears, what was once scary is now easy and comfortable?

Making a major change in your living conditions, such as moving to a new home, ranks 28th out of 43 on the Holmes-Rahe Life Stress Inventory. It’s a pretty big

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risk. Moving into a senior living community can also cause stress as you deal with meeting new people (#14 on the Holmes-Rahe Life Stress Inventory), financial changes (#16 on the list), and changes in your residence (#32 on the list).

But there are many positives about a move to senior living, like Quail Park of Lynnwood, which include:

If you think about it, there are quite a few benefits to taking risks, such as unforeseen opportunities that arise, building confidence and developing new skills, creating a sense of pride and accomplishment, the opportunity to create change in your life, building emotional resilience, and feeling more engaged and happier.

When it comes to senior living, how to you take that first step? It’s simple–schedule a visit. A visit to a community, such as Quail Park of Lynnwood, doesn’t mean that you’re ready for a move. What it does mean is that you’re educating yourself about new opportunities and lifestyles. You’re making a small step, and taking a small risk, which could lead to great reward.

There’s really nothing to lose!

Call Today to Schedule a Tour or For More Information

Quail Park of Lynnwood 425-329-6591

QuailParkofLynnwood.com

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Our New Normal

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For Love of Earth

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MISTER ROGERS, WE NEED YOU

FINISHING STRONG

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Map to a Purpose-Driven Life

Reject Ageist Messaging

BEAT THE HEAT

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TAKING OFF OUR MASKS

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ADD MEANING AND JOY TO LIFE BY DOING SOMETHING YOU LOVE

LeRoy Bell Rocks On

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How Do You Feel About Getting Older?

HONORING SCHOLASTIC EXCELLENCE FOR 66 YEARS

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CONQUER YOUR SWEET TOOTH You’ll Feel Better and Age Better

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TAKE A SUNDAY DRIVE Day-Tripping in Western WA

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PERILS OF DIABETES What You Should Know

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THE OTHER BOOM Retirement Living Options Surge

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BR AIN POWER

Travels to the

ease and dignity. With this in mind, the prospect of easing anxiety about the complex process of dying sounded like an idea worth investigating. What surprised me as I dove into the recent resurgence of scientific research is that psychedelics offer a range of benefits for older adults.

I was surprised to learn, for example, that psychedelics can reduce chronic inflammation. Prolonged, systemic inflammation The one voyage I absolutely must take before I die will transport is a dangerous condition in which the entire body responds as if me not to exotic geographic locales, but to unexplored regions it was under attack. Systems get stuck in “fight-or-flight” mode. of my mind. I follow in the footsteps of Aldous Huxley who Resources needed for normal functions are redirected toward longed “to visit the mind’s antipodes and do some visionary protective responses. Body and brain slowly starve. Chronic sightseeing.” inflammation is increasingly recognized as a major risk factor I want to experience a trip on psilocybin. for a range of age-related diseases and debilities,

BY MICHAEL C. Psilocybin belongs to a class of non-addictive including dementia.

PATTERSON drugs called psychedelics, which includes LSD, There’s more: Psychedelics also promote mescaline, peyote, and ayahuasca. Psychedelics have earned brain plasticity. Research has shown that psychedelics stimulate their notoriety because of their consistent ability to provide a the brain’s ability to change and grow. A meta-analysis or recent transcendent and mystical experience. I’ll return to this topic research reported, for example, that a single administration of a in a bit. psychedelic drug produces rapid changes in plastic mechanisms My recent interest in psilocybin was piqued by its reported in the brain, “on a molecular, neuronal, synaptic, and dendritic ability to diminish the fear of dying. I would like to die with level.” Psychedelics stimulate the growth of multiple brain

Antipodes of the Mind

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structures. This is mind-expansion on a biological level.

Researchers believe that the increased plasticity may be the mechanism that supports the remarkable ability of psychedelics to reduce the symptoms of depression, anxiety, and PTSD. The relief is rapid and long-lasting. A major randomized, controlled trial conducted at Johns Hopkins University studied the effect of psychedelics on cancer patients who often develop clinically significant symptoms of depression and anxiety because of their diagnosis. The study showed that a high dose of psilocybin produced “large decreases . . . in depressed mood and anxiety, along with increases in quality of life, life meaning and optimism, and decreases in death anxiety.”

That all sounds great to me. A healing trip worth taking.

And, on top of all the health benefits, research shows that a guided psychedelic trip reliably produces a life-changing, mystical experience. Wow, cool!

This takes us back to Huxley’s “antipodes of the mind,” those mental territories so far from home they remain unexplored.

I don’t want to leave this life having explored only the most familiar and accessible parts of my mind. I’m with Socrates that an unexplored life is not worth living. Leaving large swaths of exotic mental terrain unexplored seems a tragically wasted opportunity.

And psychedelics seem the perfect means of accessing the mystical states. Guided psychedelics trips have proven to reliably evoke states of altered consciousness. Compared to other means of accessing mystical realms, psychedelics are like supersonic jets. You are there and back in a single day. No sitting and meditating in a cave for decades. No need for religious conversion. No call for flagellation or sensory deprivation.

I experimented briefly with psychedelics back in my college days. My one LSD trip was entertaining but not particularly mystical. The highlight was my friends morphing into archetypal representations of themselves: The Viking. The Buddha.

It was mescaline that was mystical. It transported me to a new kind of reality where everything—myself included— became pixilated as though revealing its primal components.

No borders. Object and field became one kaleidoscopic display of luminous chards of light and color. The odd thing was that I could still walk around without bumping into trees. I could still chat with my buddies. The visual world was transformed, but was still navigable.

I loved the mescaline experience. Yet, curiously, I only tripped two, maybe three times. There was no craving to repeat the exhilarating experience. These are hallmarks of the psychedelic and mystical experiences. They are revelatory. They open your eyes to a new way of seeing the world. Once opened, there is no particular need for reinforcement. You were blind, but now

The Legal Status of Psilocybin The use, sale, and possession of psilocybin in the United States is illegal under federal law. Psilocybin has been classified as a Schedule 1 controlled substance since 1970, which indicates that it has “no accepted medical use and a high potential for abuse.” Neither condition appears to be entirely true, and the restrictions on psychedelic research are finally in the process of being loosened.

Dr. Tony Back of the University of Washington’s School of Medicine says that the Schedule 1 designation, “… really stems back to the Nixon administration and his dislike for hippies … It’s [psilocybin] really quite safe when taken properly.”

In spite of its illegal status on a federal level, a number of states have worked to legalize the controlled use of psilocybin.

“Deprioritization” means that law enforcement considers arrests for use of psilocybin to be a low priority and the municipality has no interest in using scarce budgetary resources to prosecute the use of psilocybin. Detroit, Ann Arbor, and Washtenaw County in Michigan, Easthampton in Massachusetts, and Seattle and Port Townsend in Washington state have passed legislation stating that the prosecution of anyone using psilocybin is of the lowest lawenforcement priority and that city resources should not be spent on such prosecutions.

“Decriminalization” means that rather than arresting people for possession and consumption of psilocybin, the police may issue citations or fines. In 2019, Denver became the first city to decriminalize psilocybin, followed shortly thereafter by Oakland and Santa Cruz in California, along with Washington, D.C., and Somerville, Easthampton, Northampton and Cambridge in Massachusetts. In October 2021, Seattle extended its deprioritization policy to become the largest city to decriminalize psilocybin.

(CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)

Aging with Confidence

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Psychedelics

promote brain plasticity.

Research has shown they stimulate the brain’s ability to change and grow.

you see. I have to tell you this is very strange language for a lifelong atheist and avowed skeptic.

The only other quasi-mystical experience I have had was also in college. It was brought on, I believe, by sleep deprivation. I had been working through the night as a stagehand at McCarter Theater in Princeton, NJ, getting ready for the opening of a new show. I reached a point of exhaustion, and was rather glum and lonely as I walked home alone through the perfectly empty Princeton campus. I felt a slight breeze and had the distinct impression that time had stopped. I looked into the black sky and saw a single pink magnolia blossom floating slowly into my hand.

Existence had paused for an instant to offer me this reminder of beauty and an assurance that all would be well. This makes no sense, of course. I don’t really believe existence paused on my account. The experience, nevertheless, had that “noetic quality” (CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS PAGE)

of being imbued with profound meaning and significance. It lifted the weight of loneliness and replaced the negative effect with a sense of peace and quiet joy.

Psychedelics are said to be mind-manifesting. They evoke and bring forth contents of our subconscious minds. The nature of the trip is highly influenced by the set and setting. In clinical settings, there are always helpful guides who prepare you for the trip, are present with you while under the influence of the drug, and also help you process the trip after it is done.

Having experienced a bit of the mystical in my youth, I’m curious to explore the antipodes of my mature mind, a mind that is jam packed with seven decades worth of knowledge, memories, and experiences. It would be lovely to take a psilocybin trip and have all that roiling, boiling confusion brought into peaceful harmony.

It would be lovely to relinquish life with a smile. It is all one. It all makes sense. It’s all lovely. What a wonderful trip it was.

Michael C. Patterson is a consultant and coach who uses brain and mind sciences to optimize well-being across the lifespan. Michael and his MINDRAMP colleague Roger Anunsen have recently launched the MINDRAMP podcasts, Live Long & Live Well. You can subscribe to the podcasts at www.mindramp.org or directly at mindramp.buzzsprout.com

3rd Act Magazine does not endorse or encourage the use of psilocybin or other psychedelics.

There could be potential drawbacks including interaction or counteraction with other medications.

Please check with your doctor before considering taking this kind of a “trip.”

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students visit them to entertain, bring cards, and do crafts.

Walking the CRISTA grounds gives residents other opportunities to interact with CRISTA Ministries’ staff and many conversations lead to lasting friendships. Some choose to volunteer at the ministry headquarters and during fundraisers for the radio stations at CRISTA Media.

Living in a Multigenerational Setting Makes Life Better!

You’ve enjoyed time with people of all ages for your entire life so why stop now? Moving into a retirement community doesn’t have to limit your connection to kids and young adults!

Cristwood Park at CRISTA Senior Living in Shoreline offers a unique setting where residents are surrounded by kids and adults of all ages.

Located on a beautiful 55-acre campus that also houses King’s Schools, CRISTA Media, and the headquarters for World Concern, Cristwood residents have many opportunities to build relationships with people from age 2 to 100.

After spending decades working at a high school, Patty chose to live at Cristwood Park so she could volunteer at King’s Schools. “After we got settled, I began attending every King’s game. I keep score and even ride the bus to away games,” Patty said.

“A few of the girls’ teams adopted me and we have a lot of fun. Cheering on the teams and Aging with Confidence

attending games gets me out of the house and keeps me active.”

Other seniors at Cristwood Park volunteer to help King’s DECA students prepare for competitions, build sets for theatrical productions, and help on the playground. They are invited to every concert and event at the school, and

Living in close proximity to other age groups is a benefit for everyone. It is known to provide cognitive stimulation for seniors as well as keeping them in touch with current culture, filling a void for those without children and grandchildren nearby, encouraging an active lifestyle, reducing depression and isolation, giving them more energy, helping with technology and communication, and giving opportunities to mentor, which brings great sense of fulfillment during the later years of life.

At the end of the day, Cristwood Park residents get the luxury of returning to their apartments and taking a break from the younger generation. It’s a winwin situation for everyone!

CRISTA Senior Living is home to seniors 55 and older, with two campuses located in the Puget Sound and customized to suit your lifestyle. Cristwood, our Shoreline campus, is a Christian Life Plan Community, with apartment living options for independent lifestyles, to assisted living and memory care. Crista Shores, our Silverdale campus, offers apartment living options for an independent lifestyle and assisted living on the beautiful Dyes Inlet waterfront.

If you would like to speak to one of our senior living experts, please call us today at 206-546-7565, or visit cristaseniorliving.com.

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ON THE LIGHTER SIDE

treasure hunting

BY ANNIE CULVER

It was a daydream that almost became a reality— renting a pickup or U-Haul with a girlfriend and hitting the road. Our destination? Georgia’s 100-mile Peanut Pickin’ Yard Sale in October sounds inviting or Florida’s scenic 72-mile one in November. There’s also the world’s longest yard sale, a whopping 690 miles through six states on Highway 127 from Michigan to Alabama every August.

Garage sales—or as Martha Stewart called hers, the “Great American Tag Sale—are tough to resist. Martha sold 10,000 items the first day on her Katonah farm, north of New York City, and soon raised more than $800,000 for the Martha Stewart Center for Living, which provides primary care for older adults at Mount Sinai Hospitals in NYC. “I don’t want to be known as a hoarder,” Martha said, as she bared contents of the numerous storage buildings on her property for

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a sale that took 23 days to pull together for an ABC-TV special.

Imagine quick-witted antique experts, a celebrity auctioneer, Martha’s 17 peacocks, as well as loads of high-end shoppers who bought tickets so they could elbow in to score a $600 meat cleaver or a made-in-Seattle, pricey glassybaby votive candle holder. More of an adventure than most yard sale fiends bargain for, certainly.

It was post-WWII urban growth that launched the garage sale phenomenon. Today, one source estimates 165,000 of them take place each week in the U.S. A useful website—https://gsalr.com—can jump start interest.

What’s the allure? You might think it’s chasing down a terrific deal, but those in the know claim the top reason people shop garage sales is for the fun of it. Once you kick back and realize you’re not apt to be the one to score that gorilla suit somebody’s selling for a song, you can relax.

Disappointment melts into relief and joy because you know you don’t need a hairy gorilla getup anyway.

It took a while before I quashed the fantasy that schlepping along a 100-mile sea of garage sales would be ecstasy rather than rampant consumerism. Where to put a truckload of more stuff? Who really wants to become Martha Stewart, even though she overcame her hoarding and boosted a charity?

Discovering community garage sales has more benefits—less gas, a valuable experience

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much closer to home, and a captivating adventure as you learn more about the quirks and friendliness of neighbors nearby.

With no particular agenda, a pal and I headed out in mid-May for an annual one-day happening featuring more than 320 registered yard sales right where we live in West Seattle. My friend still raves about the perfect recliner she found for her living room. I’m partial to the pink sweatshirt I’ve been warned not to wear outside the house, a handful of free CDs, and a red In-N-Out Burger ballcap that reads “Quality You Can Taste.”

It can be a satisfying revelation when you come upon a garage sale that touches your heart. A friend on the other side of Seattle suggested we check out an estate sale organized by neighbors of a woman who recently moved into a nursing home. The incredible collection of 3,000 books on topics ranging from coyotes to Buddhist rituals in Nepal, plus Motown music, beautiful glassware, and plenty more convinced us this was a woman who led an eccentric and full life. The event was so fruitful, we returned for a second visit.

That’s when we stepped beyond the sale and asked those neighbors if we might visit this woman in her nursing home. They agreed and alerted her when we’d arrived. With a floral bouquet to show our appreciation, we hoped to boost her spirits a bit. She brightened up as we shared our delight over which of her possessions we’d acquired Embarking on this bonus adventure and expressing gratitude turned out to be a sweet reward.

Annie Culver developed a knack for unearthing oddball characters and improbable events as a staff writer for various newspapers. In the early 90s, she went to work for websites where she wrote sassy essays aimed at women. In recent years, she morphed into a writer for several universities in the Northwest. She retired in 2016, yet still enjoys freelancing.

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fall 2022

| 3rd Act magazine 23

A UKRAINE RITE of PASSAGE Story & Photos by DAVID FREEMAN

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I celebrated turning 66 serenaded by air raid sirens while sheltering in the school kitchen. A few colleagues join me to share a celebratory glass of wine until the all-clear signal sounds. I will never forget what should have been an unremarkable birthday.

Explosions jar my wife and me out of bed, forcing us and others to take shelter at the international school where I work in Kyiv. It is a week before my 66th birthday and we number about 40, mostly children and dependents of our maintenance crew— cleaning ladies and security guards. Most of the foreign teachers departed weeks before the invasion, heeding the recommendations of their respective embassies. But we stayed. My Ukrainian wife Iryna* did not want to go. And I would not return to the U.S. without her.

We remain for a week, sleeping on a mattress in the basement and sharing the swimming pool changing room with another couple. Each morning we climb the stairs to the main floor to prepare meals. Sheltering in a well-financed private school sure beats a subway station—big screen TVs, plenty of toys for the children, and a fully stocked kitchen ease the physical discomfort. But anxiety returns with each air raid siren. Bombs fall kilometers away, yet shock waves knock down chairs stacked neatly on the student desks by cleaning ladies who show up to work every day.

Our school transportation department arranges several caravans to the border. Iryna reluctantly agrees to go on the last bus, which departs the day after my 66th birthday. I have never witnessed such a heart-rending departure as when one of our school guards kisses his family goodbye before they board.

His 5-year-old daughter, Nastya, has been given a vital role to play—keeping my wife safe during the journey. The trip would require three long days. The Russians cut off the most direct route to Poland, so Clockwise from top left: Ukrainian refuges on Lviv railway station waiting for a train to escape to Europe (Photo from Alamay); selfie of sleep-deprived David and Iryna Freeman while sheltering in Kyiv. David trying to get some sleep between air raid sirens; huddling in a shelter. Iryna and little Natalia comfort each other.

Aging with Confidence

we head south and west toward Hungary. At each checkpoint, Ukrainian militia check the driver’s papers and examine the identification of the men in the bus, to ensure no Ukrainian males of fighting age are trying to flee the country.

Cars heading west and semi-rigs heading east pack all three lanes of the two-lane roads. At onepoint, Ukrainian police stop our group due to our drivers’ liberal interpretation of the traffic laws. A heated discussion ensues. One of my Ukrainian colleagues strongly suggests I go outside and stand next to our drivers. I do. It works. An older, foreign male apparently has persuasive ability, even without saying a word. We are soon on our way again.

Our first day ends in Vinnytsia. We shelter in the basement of an unfinished office building and endure freezing temperatures, snoring companions, and overflowing port-a-potties. A normal night’s sleep will elude me for weeks and this night, the sandman ignores me all together. We climb out of bed wearing the same clothes we’d worn the day before. Expecting to head for Uzhgorod and a crossing into Hungary, we receive word our course has changed. Evacuation planners in Poland tracking our escape by GPS determine we should head to the cultural capital of Western Ukraine, Lviv.

Our second night finds us once again in an unfinished office building. It should provide a better night’s sleep but air raid sirens blare most of the night, sending us to the basement where we stand and stare at each other in disbelief. By morning we reach one of our many breaking points. Still, we pull ourselves together and keep going.

The planners now direct us east to the larger and more popular border crossing at Hrebenne. Our drivers argue that we should head north to Ustyluh, a smaller and less popular crossing. It falls to me to make the decision. Do I follow the directions of our team in Poland, or trust the navigators on the ground who got us this far? Dance with the one that brought you. We head north and reach the border within a few hours.

Our drivers skip the long cue and take us right to the crossing. The police wave us through because we are not attempting to bring the buses into Poland.

(CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)

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| 3rd Act magazine 25

David’s unhappy birthday party while sheltering at the international school where he worked in Kyiv; at the Polish border.

When asked why I stayed behind and then raise money for several weeks after escaping, it’s because I have an audience of one: an 18-yearold daughter, a student at the University of Washington. What other reason do I need?

(CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS PAGE) Ukrainian border authorities make cursory checks of the Ukrainians.

But the foreigners undergo closer inspection. One dual-citizen in our group clears the checkpoint because his Israeli passport spelled his name differently than his Ukrainian document. Polish authorities welcome us like long-lost relatives with free food and baby supplies, clothing, and kids’ games.

The American School of Warsaw sends a bus to their side of the border to collect the 29 of us who made the crossing. They’ve already lined up temporary housing, dropping off some members of our group before we make it to Warsaw. Once we arrive on their campus, I use their phone to connect with our head of school to confirm our safe arrival—an emotional call with tears all around.

The school in Warsaw has lined up volunteer families to arrange housing for members of our group. Iryna and I are paired with an American military contractor and his Venezuelan wife. She is already heavily engaged in relief efforts like many at the school. They decide to put us up in an

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inexpensive hotel, just one step up from a hostel but miles above where we have been sleeping.

During the next two weeks we distribute money to members of our little troop raised by my brother and me via Facebook. Iryna and I struggle to meet the visa and vaccination requirements needed to get her into the United States, but succeed and arrive in New York City about three weeks after the start of the war. Within a few days we are ensconced in the bosom of my family on Hood Canal.

We continued to raise money for refugees in Poland and for the militia fighting in Ukraine, from baby clothes to bulletproof vests. Friends, family, colleagues, and strangers donated more than $21,000. But now that Putin has left me unemployed, I need to shift my focus to finding a job.

When asked why I stayed behind and then raise money for several weeks after escaping, it’s because I have an audience of one: an 18-year-old daughter, a student at the University of Washington. What other reason do I need? *Iryna’s full name is Iryna Buketova-Freeman. Her family name means bouquet in Russian. She is a daughter of the Soviet Union, an ethnic Russian born in Uzbekistan, later living in Kazakhstan before moving to Chernobyl when she was about 7.

The explosion at the power plant disrupted her final year in high school. She stayed in Ukraine after the dissolution of the Soviet Union.

David Freeman grew up in White Center in South Seattle. He graduated from the University of Washington in 1978, and worked as a TV reporter before becoming an international educator. He worked in Ecuador, Kenya, China, and Pakistan before accepting his position in Kyiv, Ukraine.

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Want.” It was developed by Jackson Financial Life Insurance Company in conjunction with Richard J. Leider, best-selling author of The Power of Purpose. In it they say, “Finding your purpose is a misleading concept because it’s not something you have to go out and get, but rather something you need to turn within and unlock.” The good news is that “your life purpose will always express your gifts, passions, and values. No exceptions.” What a great pallet to work with!

Live with

Residing in a purpose-built independent living community will help you stay in tune with your wellness needs and enhance overall peace of mind and happiness. We Creating a life with purpose invite you to stop by to tour our and passion is a theme I speak beautiful apartments at Cadence about, and a resource tool I use

BY TRACEY HARVEY Kent-Meridian. Isn’t it time you lived is a worksheet titled, “Retire on COLOR: Right click swatch, and findyour andbest replace life? with correct color Purpose—Creating the Life You We all want to live well at every age

Artistry

and life stage. Learning to live well is an art and even artists must dig deep, sometimes, to unearth their creativity. Living in a creative space can feed our artistry and ignite our passions. At Cadence Living, every decision we make—from the design of our communities, apartments, and common areas, to our artful dining options, programs, and amenities—is focused on surrounding you with inspiration.

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What I’ve observed is resisting change, even when it’s positive, is often the first obstacle in peoples’ minds to creating the life they desire. I have witnessed—countless times—plans to downsize, sell a home, and move into a supportive community get stifled with overwhelming emotions and fear of change. This common occurrence Aging with Confidence

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“GO OUT ON A LIMB. THAT’S WHERE THE FRUIT IS.” —JIMMY CARTER

REACH FOR LIFE AND REAP REWARDS FOR

BEING BRAVE

BY DORI GILLAM

Older adults are generally perceived as becoming more risk adverse as we age. A host of studies confirm that risk aversion can be due to many factors, from lower dopamine levels in aging brains, to just plain good old fashioned accumulated wisdom. Yet, challenging our comfort zones, even incrementally, can expand and enrich our lives. To understand more about how older adults perceive risk, I asked 15 friends—in their 60s and 70s— what actions or activities felt risky to them, where their risk gauge was set, and how risk avoidant they feel they are. Here’s what I learned: Most of my friends agree the perception of risk—in any endeavor—is in the eye of the risk-taker. That’s

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why it’s not helpful to go “risk-comparison shopping” by comparing yourself to others. Bike riding might feel risky for one person and an enjoyable pursuit for another.

Caring for grandchildren may be a joy for some or feel risky to someone with painful arthritis who fears not being able to keep up with the kids. Clearly, growing your risk muscles doesn’t mean doing something death-defying— it can simply be just stretching a bit or trying something new.

There are many areas where we often perceive risk— the four most mentioned were financial, health, physical/ recreational, and social/emotional.

When it comes to financial risks, the response is universal. My friends aren’t interested in taking financial risks, at least intentionally. The general agreement being that as we age, there just isn’t enough time to recover from a financial misstep.

I’m sorry to say there are many older adults who do take known health risks. Overindulgence in alcohol, food, and being sedentary are a few nemeses that can cause

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illness or shorten their lives. Those are risks we should all avoid! Others pay closer attention.

When friends Mike Darr and Brad Trenary moved to Vashon Island, they agreed on some house rules designed to reduce risk of injury, such as no walking around the house in the dark (a toe was broken), always know where the rugs are, and no using ladders when home alone. Mike and Brad also feel a time crunch as they age. Brad says, “For the last two years during COVID, we weren’t willing to fly or take road trips to visit family, but we long to see our loved ones again and say things that need to be said in person, so we’re planning those travels now.” Mike added, “We’re willing to take calculated risks for things we value.

For things that will enhance our lives.” They’re only going out on a limb for the fruit if someone is steadying the ladder.

Kyoko Matsumoto Wright also hasn’t traveled much lately or performed in plays for a few decades—both pursuits she loves. “When I have time, I’ll pursue more international travel and get back into acting,” she says.

Sometimes taking a risk means getting back up on a horse you haven’t ridden in a while.

I love hiking and climbed Mt. Rainier. Many would view this as a dangerous, off-limits adventure, or downright crazy! But I didn’t just start hiking next to some guy who was on his way up. It was a carefully calculated plan.

Friends my age, who were average athletes like me, had summitted Mt. Rainier. After learning how they did it, I trained for six months and hired Rainier Mountaineering Inc. (RMI Expeditions)—an internationally known guide service—to lead me up with a group. I climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro when I was 63 using the same plan and made lifelong friends on both trips. There are many ways to mitigate physical risk while trying new activities. Partner with a friend, join a group, or take a class.

The majority I spoke with agree that the toughest risks for them are often in the social/emotional category. My friend Bill says, “Sometimes we need to accept some discomfort to be of service to others.” One such friend is Nancy Slote, who went outside her comfort zone to sign on as a volunteer for a health care and abortion hotline. It’s intense and uncomfortable at times, but she told me her drive to help is worth the exhaustion she feels at the end of her shift.

Bill points out, “Risk can also be different at each stage of life. If you try out for a play at 22 and don’t get cast, you have decades to try again. At 82, it may be the last time you can try that.” It’s the anxiety of recognizing that the older we get, we are running out of time. All the more reason to try for the ripe fruit out on that limb.

Mike, Janis Cox, and Rhonda Gardner all sell their art

Aging with Confidence

online and agree it can be a scary endeavor. “What if no one buys? Does that mean they don’t like my work?” they said. But they’ve each done it anyway. They accept the uncomfortable feeling that comes with putting their work and themselves in the public domain. Rhonda has taken and taught many art classes but admits that entering her art in a juried show feels more personal, especially if she doesn’t get chosen. She feels the anxiety and still enters the show. After all, she may win, too!

Can you live a little larger? Instead of risking, think of it as reaching.

The upside of stretching your comfort zone and reaching for a goal is that you might succeed and even if you don’t, you will surely grow. When something holds us back, it’s because we often fail to quantify the perceived downside. What, exactly, are you risking? Loss of life or limb, or only a strange taste in your mouth from trying a new food. Or are you simply afraid of being embarrassed or MOST OF looking silly? My friend Rebecca Crichton follows a Buddhist MY FRIENDS tenet: She’s “open to outcome, AGREE THE not attached to outcome.” She PERCEPTION enters into activities or new friendships hoping for success, OF RISK— but if it doesn’t work out, she IN ANY doesn’t have to label it as failure.

ENDEAVOR— She knows that trying something new can be its own reward.

IS IN THE EYE Perhaps, as we age, rather OF THE RISK- than being patently risk averse, we simply know ourselves better.

TAKER. We have tested our limits over our lifetime and we are more aware of what is an attractive risk and what isn’t. Some escapades may have lost their appeal. But that doesn’t mean we should stop being curious, open, and reaching for more fruit. Be brave. Keep looking at what feels like a risk to you, why it does, and if there’s something keeping your life smaller than it needs to be.

My latest emotional risk? After over three decades of being single, I’m taking a risk on love at age 70!

Several months ago, I met Mack McCoy, 67, while singing with friends at a karaoke studio. He wasn’t looking for a relationship, as he was still grieving his wife’s death.

I had tired of online dating. Luckily, we both said, “Yes!” to meeting again, and to the rewards of planning our future.

Dori Gillam writes and speaks on creative aging, resilience, and ageism. She has toured the state with her presentation, “What’s Age Got to do With It?” A lifelong Seattle resident, she has worked for Sound Generations, AARP, and the Bayview Retirement Community. Learn more at www.dorigillam.com.

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Love, Risk

&

Resolution

You’re in love. It’s going great, and you’ve moved

from thinking about your next date to considering a long-term commitment. When you’re over 60 and over the moon, though, there’s a lot more to think about than bridesmaids’ dresses.

“I think the feeling of love is universal, but it’s also matched to where we are in life and how we show up,” says Ross Kling, a marriage and family therapist in Seattle. “The beauty of falling in love at any age is that it creates a new future for you.”

That new future takes a bit of work. Older adults have spent decades forming patterns for themselves.

How do you honor someone else’s life patterns, experiences, and choices and blend them with your own?

“There are two aspects to patterns,” says Kling. “The ones that support

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our individuality, and the ones that keep us from growing—as in, being in a rut.” As a therapist, Kling suggests embracing things that define your partner and weaving them together with your own patterns. Take a hard look at behaviors that don’t support the relationship, though. You might not be able to change them, but with communication, there could be adjustment and compromise.

“Important questions absolutely should be talked about, but the answers can be really hard and will vary from one couple to the

next,” says Judith Gordon, a Seattle psychologist. “It’s a very challenging time to be in a relationship.”

At any age, a relationship’s lifespan can be affected by many things that might, or might not, happen.

For older adults, though, the actual human lifespan is a factor. There are risks involved. The possibility of physical or mental decline is real.

Gordon started her own laterin-life relationship in her early 60s.

“When I met Lance, age didn’t matter. I was vital, he was vital. We didn’t have limitations. We hadn’t experienced loss.” Now, at 80 and 79, age is starting to affect the choices they make as a couple, even things that used to be simple. For example, they used to have three cats that lived out happy lives. Now they’d like to get more cats, but kittens might outlive

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BY PRISCILLA CHARLIE HINCKLEY

them. “When you’re young,” says Gordon, “you just deal with it. Now we have to be more responsible and think it through.”

Decisions about housing are another issue. Living in a multi-level townhouse, with stairs, is beginning to be a concern, as is simply living in Seattle. “We’re thinking about other options, maybe Whidbey Island,” says Gordon. “But we have to take more factors into consideration, such as health care on an island.” It also takes motivation and energy to move and to set up a new home.

Essential conversation topics include whether to explore senior housing options that offer various levels of care; what will happen if one of you needs to become a caregiver for the other; and how close you want to live to your kids. And then there’s the

Aging with Confidence

talk about physical intimacy and what each person wants and expects.

“Talking about sex is awkward at any age, but as we get older, it’s more important. There will be changes and differences,” says Gordon. “There are losses that are hard to accept and have to be dealt with.” But sex can be good even with those changes. Fortunately, adds Gordon, there are more books about it now, and more information and discussion than there used to be.

Communication is key to every aspect of living together. “It’s really important to talk about all those things, so you know where the other person stands. You’ve shared concerns and there are no real surprises. It’s easier to talk when it’s not a crisis,” says Gordon. “Later, you can build on previous conversations. It’s an ongoing partnership.”

For couples who choose to move in together or marry, there are important financial and legal decisions to consider, too. This may be one of the most uncomfortable issues to discuss. LuAnne Perry, a family law attorney in Seattle, has seen the problems that arise when people don’t talk.

“Introduce it before you start living together,” says Perry. “You should be able to have a frank conversation and say, ’We need to be aware of things and how we feel about them.’”

In Washington state, older adults have some different issues than younger ones. For example, if one partner has quite a bit more wealth than the other, and both are retired, there would be no community property. “If they weren’t creating new wealth,” says Perry, “then if they were to break up or one dies, there would be no jointly held property.

So if one moved into a house already

owned by the other, they wouldn’t be getting any property rights at all.”

Social security income is not community property. If one partner is still working, however, their income would be community property.

“If you are the person making the money,” says Perry, “you might want to have an agreement that your income is not going to become joint property.”

“The older someone is when they get into a new relationship,” Perry continues, “the more they want to keep what they brought into it.

That’s definitely even more true if they have kids.” When one partner has significantly more wealth than the other, though, there could be an agreement that the other would get a percentage of the estate, or perhaps be able to live in the house they shared for a period of time when one dies.

It’s so much more complicated than starting out together at 25 or so, but it can be done successfully.

Gordon and her partner co-own their house, but all other finances are separate, and their money will be left separately to their sons.

“I didn’t understand about getting older,” says Gordon. “A lot of it is about the mental, existential stuff. I’m still me, but the realities are different.”

Her son, she said, gave her the best advice. “He said to me, ’Decide how you want to live your life. Then, whatever happens, you’ll deal with it.’

I think that’s wonderful.”

Priscilla Charlie Hinckley has been a writer and producer in Seattle television and video for 35 years, with a primary interest in stories covering health and medicine, women’s and children’s issues, social justice, and education. She enjoys taking a lighthearted approach to serious topics.

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EXPRESS MORE OF YOU

Creatively?

YES YOU CAN!

BY SALLY FOX

E

veryone is born creative. Over time, many of us are ambushed by a set of critical gremlins who want us to believe that we don’t have the talent or capacity to do what we love. Self-judgment, comparison, and competition form a wicked trio that squashes our innate joy in expressing ourselves creatively.

The good news is that with age, we can change that. Our third act comes with a permission slip to abandon the old messages that were never true. Were you told you couldn’t sing? Time to open your mouth. Or couldn’t make art? Bring out the pencils and fingerpaints. Or not to tinker in the garage? Tinker away. Today is your best time ever to create if you’re willing to try.

I’m living proof. For years, I belonged to a millionmember chorus of people who believed they couldn’t sing, at least not in public. When we were children, someone probably said, “You can’t carry a tune,” “You’re off-pitch,” or “You call that singing?” Humiliated, we believed what we heard. We retreated, closed down, and started apologizing for our voices.

Nobody was there to remind us that anyone can sing if they can talk. All babies are born cooing and crooning.

No child says, “I can’t sing,” until something discouraging happens.

For me, that moment occurred in third grade. I was standing in our class chorus, front row right, as the teacher, Mrs. Johnson, conducted. As I sang my heart out, too enthusiastically for her taste, she stopped the class and said, with an over-sweetened smile, “Dear, I think you’d be better suited as a soloist.” What a great compliment, I thought, until the real meaning hit: “Your voice sticks out and not in a

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good way.” After that, I only sang when hidden in church or among Christmas carolers.

I returned to singing 50-plus years later when, during the pandemic, I decided to take an online course with Chloë Goodchild from England. Goodchild believes everyone can sing once they find their natural “naked” voice. I learned to stop judging every note and instead learned to witness my voice. I enjoyed the power of silence. As I practiced in triads with classmates, I didn’t worry whether my voice would warble, break, or miss a pitch. My voice blossomed. Soon, I even dared to be the one who started the “Happy Birthday” chorus—small for some but big for me. Now you can’t stop me from singing.

Many children have had similar, discouraging experiences in art class. In grade school, “artistic students” are often singled out while others, like me, go into the “no talent” pile. Why try when we’re sure we’ll never make “real art?” According to Dana Lynne Andersen, director of the Academy for Art, Creativity and Consciousness at Awakening Arts, this often happens to children by age 10. The good news is that once her students open the door to creating again, they always find an inner seed ready to sprout.

I’m the poster child for someone who believed she couldn’t paint. Then, at age 69, I was introduced to an older woman who taught watercolors at the local senior center.

“Try my class, you’ll love it,” she said. I responded with my standard-issue remark, “Sorry, I don’t do art.” She refused

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come. Friends who share my creative interests in writing, singing, gardening, and painting make my journey more fun. We applaud each other’s successes and lift each other after a stumble.

• Start small. Pick something you’d love to do and jump in.

One tiny action is better than a thousand “somedays.” If you want to sing, hum. If you want to make art, doodle.

Easy is good.

• Use courses, online and in-person, to give yourself some structure. Classes can provide an opportunity to be social, motivation to do assignments, and tools to help you grow.

• Discover what you like and do what pleases you. You set your own gold standard. When you enjoy what you’re doing, you do more of it—and then, improving your craft comes naturally.

to accept that, and soon I tried her class and found myself enchanted by the world of color. I learned: • Talent doesn’t matter (at my age, who cares?) but trying does.

• “Do I like it?” works better than, “Am I good?”

• The best question of all: “Is this fun?”

If you have even the smallest hankering to do something creative—art, music, or a form unique to you—you can if you allow yourself to try. I can’t promise that if you sing you’ll make it to the stage of the Metropolitan Opera. But at age 70, that’s not where I’m headed. Rather than worrying about how to jump through the hoops of other people’s standards, I’m learning what pleases me and brings me joy.

Here are some ideas to help you express more of the creative you: • Drop the old messages. Identify the self-confining “you can’t” baggage you received—it was never true. Or, if you were told that you were talented and “should” make art, drop that, too. This round’s for you.

• Accept the occasional discouragement. I still struggle with the gremlins of self-judgment who want to put the kibosh on my projects. My best tip for when gremlins say mean things like, “Well, that wasn’t so good” or “You’re wasting your time” is to look straight at them and announce, “I’m doing what I love.”

It works. Gremlins do not know how to counter love.

So, yes, you can create your heart out! Do what you love and the magic will follow. I guarantee it.

Sally Fox, PhD, is a life transitions and creativity coach and author of Meeting the Muse After Midlife: One Woman’s Journey to Joy through Creative Self-Expression, to be published in winter 2022. Find her at www. engagingpresence.com.

• Enjoy being a beginner—and cultivate a beginner’s mind. If you were once discouraged, wipe the slate clean.

We may be getting older, but it’s never too late to say, “This is my time to create.”

• Team up with a friend for mutual support. Encouragement is golden, especially from friends who like to learn and grow. When my old “I can’t” or “I’ll never be good” messages surface, a friend will remind me how far I’ve

Aging with Confidence

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33

BY ANN HEDREEN PHOTOS BY ERNIE SAPIRO

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is busy. She’s got records to break. She is closing in on the Washington state records for the 50 and 100 meters, and on this rainy morning, the state Senior Games Track & Field Finals are just six weeks away.

But taking the time to drive from her home in Tacoma to a photographer’s studio in Seattle to pose for the cover of 3rd Act is also important, because Hanna’s core mission is to motivate all of us to believe that anything is possible.

“This is what 68 going on 69 looks like!” she says, as she flexes her bicep for the camera. “This is what a millennial coach will do for you!”

Hanna is five-foot-seven, but looks taller, as if her legs had stretched and stretched over a lifetime of running.

But that is not her story. It was not until she was 57 that she woke up one day and had an overwhelming feeling that she wanted to run. “The seed of speed lay dormant in me for 50 years,” she explains. Though she had never been an athlete, she somehow knew, deep down, that she would be fast. And so, at an age when most people tend to slow down, or stop running altogether, Hanna was ready to start.

Her first coach was her husband, Stephen Hanna, who she says favored “old-school” but effective training techniques li ke running w it h a backpack full of bricks. His drills and her determination turned out to be a powerful combo. In her first Washington State Senior Games in 2011, Hanna won gold in both the 50 meters and the 100 meters. In 2013, in her first National Senior Games, she came in 9th in the 100 meters and 11th in the 200 meters, and earned a bronze medal in the 4 x

Aging with Confidence

100 relay. The list goes on. Though she ruptured her Achilles tendon in 2014— right in the middle of a race, with a brutal snap as loud as the starting gun—Hanna was able to come back and again win two gold medals in the 2017 Washington games.

Stephen Hanna died of cancer in 2018.

He and Madonna had both been beloved teachers: he at a Tacoma elementary school, she as a fashion marketing teacher at high schools in Bremerton and later Tacoma. For Hanna, it was a second career, after several years of working in the fashion industry. Her “Flights of Fancy” runway shows for students with disabilities earned her a Point of Light Award from President George H.W. Bush. She was also recognized twice as Washington state’s Vocational Teacher of the Year, and twice as the Regional Teacher of the Year. She also was honored with a prestigious Milken Education Award.

After our photo shoot, Hanna told me stories of some of the students, including an autistic girl named Melissa, who smiled for the first time in her life when she modeled in one of the fashion shows.

Some of Stephen’s grade school students also got to walk the runway.

Hanna promised her husband that she would not quit running. He had been by her side during her long recovery from a near-fatal car accident in 1987, and helped her bounce back from the Achilles rupture in 2014. He knew she

could and should get back to the track after his death.

So she went in search of a coach. And “after years of teaching millennials,” she found a millennial track star—27year-old Olympic hopeful Marcus Chambers—who put her on a whole new training regimen. Two days a week she works her hamstrings, quads, glutes, triceps, biceps, back, arms, and abs at the gym. Two rounds of everything.

Sometimes she adds pushing a sled with weights on it, “focusing on the first five steps.” Three days a week, she does track drills: many, many rounds of starts, sprints and laps. Diet is crucial too: egg white omelets loaded with kale, spinach, mushrooms, onions, and turkey bacon; cereal, blueberries, yogurt, nuts, smoothies. And that’s just breakfast. Her go-to snacks are bananas, apples, oranges, gummy fruits, and the occasional éclair. Once a week, she works out with Chambers for an hour.

But Hanna is not only a 68-year-old track star. She is also a longtime member of Toastmasters, and has competed at the international level, where she made it to (CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)

Madonna Hana and Marcus Chambers are featured on the cover of Toastmaster magazine’s June 2020 issue.

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| 3rd Act magazine

35

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“Yes, I eat Wheaties! Three bowls a day!” she jokes, arms raised in perfect position. “You think I look like Wonder Woman?

I am Wonder Woman!” the 2015 semi-finals, meaning she was in the top 100 out of 30,000 competitors. She is also the author of a children’s book, which was inspired by her recognition as an educator of the need for children who have been bullied for being “different” to build self-esteem and resilience. Hanna grew up in a white, conservative suburb of Boston, so she knew firsthand what that kind of bullying felt like.

She is also an actor. If you have attended shows at the Tacoma Little Theatre, you’ve likely seen her on stage.

Recent roles include Edna in Children of a Lesser God. And if all that doesn’t sound like enough, Hanna is a motivational speaker. She likes to talk about “pebble power,” especially to audiences of older adults. “I hold this little pebble in my hand and I say, see this little pebble?

When you toss it into liquid, it creates ripples. This is what we can do in our lives. Because you guys have so many talents and different things that you can do, that you can share with people, and that you’re going to create. And then I tell them about myself, about the people I’ve been able to empower and motivate and encourage, and then I ask them, ’What’s your pebble power?’”

Her inspiration is the “pebble power” of the disabled children she worked (CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS PAGE)

PUGET SOUND

Going for Gold

Age Doesn’t Hold Back Madonna Hanna

Grow Your Risk Muscles Challenge Your Comfort Zone to Expand and Enrich Your Life

UKRAINE RITE OF PASSAGE A Bomb Shelter Birthday

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with on the fashion shows, who she encouraged to call out their own “beautiful difference,” rather than let others define them. “I have seen kids who have become empowered by the fact that they have Tourette’s, or a big birthmark on their face, or something else. Because now they can say, ’Yeah, this is my beautiful difference. Glad you noticed.’ You know?”

Back at the photo shoot, Hanna happily strikes pose after pose for photographer Ernie Sapiro. With her experience in the fashion world, she excels at holding each pose as long as necessary. “Yes, I eat Wheaties! Three bowls a day!” she jokes, arms raised in perfect position. “You think I look like Wonder Woman? I am Wonder Woman!”

And she is. Except that she’s not.

What Madonna Hanna wants us all to embrace is the idea that real people can be actors or toastmasters or awardwinning teachers or track stars, if they’re willing to put in the training time. And if they believe that anything is possible.

Ann Hedreen is an author (Her Beautiful Brain), teacher of memoir writing, and filmmaker.

Ann and her husband, Rustin Thompson, own White Noise Productions and have made more than 150 short films and several feature documentaries together, including Quick Brown Fox: An Alzheimer’s Story. Ann is currently at work on a book of essays.

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KEEP MOVING

TRIUMPHS OF

BY MIKE HARMS

ENDURANCE “My father died at 69,” Jack says. “He was grossly overweight, had an unhealthy diet, smoked, and never exercised. After I reached 60, I accepted that if I didn’t make some major life changes, I was headed in a similar direction. I was overweight, had high blood lipids, and I was addicted to tobacco.”

Today, at 79, Jack is one of my fittest personal training clients of any age. In a typical week, Jack does an hour of Pilates, strength trains for two hours, bikes 30-40 miles, and plays tennis for 5-6 hours. He also practices piano for 1-2 hours per day.

Jack’s inspirational transformation exemplifies what’s possible when we take ownership of our fitness.

ESTABLISHING A BASELINE Jack’s life-changing fitness journey started with a full physical exam, including a cardiac stress test. Getting a physical before starting a new exercise program is always prudent. It helps ensure that our bodies are ready for additional work, plus it can help establish safe exercise parameters, and it provides a baseline from which we can measure future progress.

Jack joined a gym and hired his first of four trainers. In my experience, clients get the most out of personal training when they’re humble, committed, and open to coaching.

Jack personifies these traits—he rarely misses a session, he welcomes feedback, and he works hard.

His efforts paid off. Jack’s strength, appearance, and well-being improved noticeably over time. “My progress was obvious and it was highly motivating,” Jack says.

Subsequently, his annual physicals revealed improvements in fitness and health, as well as decreased risk for a variety of disease.

EMPOWERMENT THROUGH KNOWLEDGE Jack is an MD hematologist/oncologist who spent the last 20 years in biopharma developing new drugs to fight cancer.

He holds 15 patents and authored more than 290 scientific publications. He is retired but remains a consultant to biotech companies.

Personally, and professionally, he believes in the health benefits of strength training.

“Rigorous strength training allows the body to use insulin more efficiently and minimizes the risk of diabetes,” he

Aging with Confidence

Jack working over the punching bag. Photo by Mike Harms

says. “It improves blood lipids and decreases measures of ongoing inflammation, major risk factors for cardiovascular disease. Most surprisingly, maintenance strength training decreases the incidence and likelihood of recurrence of multiple cancers.”

EXERCISING FOR LIFE Jack’s fitness from strength training allowed him to improve at other activities he enjoys, including biking, tennis, and classical piano.

“Goals I set for my 80th birthday are to play a decent tennis game …,” Jack says. “I’ve made major strides over the past year. I can move around a tennis court in a manner I couldn’t do 20 years ago. I have good hand-eye coordination. My core strength allows me to have a strong serve, a good ground stroke, and I’m able to rally at the net.” (Another goal: Perform a credible piano recital of difficult works.)

By combining a consistent strength training program with regular aerobic exercise and working with his physician to decrease risk factors associated with diseases of aging, Jack is confident that he—and others—can maintain an active lifestyle into their 80s and beyond.

And so, the journey continues.

Mike Harms is an author, coach, and owner of Muscle & Hustle gym in Seattle.

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Left: A single paddle is used in dragon boating. Photo credit: NancyEllen Regier. Below: Club SAKE masters women racing in the 2020 Sound Rowers Mercer Island Sausage Pull on Lake Washington. The masters women crew is comprised of women over the age of 40, though most are in their 50s, 60s, and 70s. Photo credit: Seattle SAKE Paddling Club.

Take a Ride with the

People Who Paddle “Finish! Finish! Finish!”

Coach Roula Bland shouted the command as we bent to our task: Paddles stabbing water then pulling back hard to try and win the race with a second boat.

We lost.

But that’s okay because what a win to be on Lake Washington this sunny day, with stunning views of mountains, sky, and blue, blue water. Sailboats billowed past as platesized turtles sunbathed on a log boom.

This was Dragon Boat 101, sponsored by the Seattle SAKE Paddling Club. Offering free, introductory outings for beginners, the club promotes the well-being, safety, training, and fitness of people who paddle.

As we newbies lined up in two rows on a Lake Washington dock, Coach Roula Bland explained how to move the 40-foot boat from a dead stop. Holding the single paddle up with straight arms, we’re told to reach forward and

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to the side. Then, with a hip rotation, we lower the paddle for the stroke back, keeping eyes up while moving in unison with paddlers in front.

We gingerly entered the dragon boats for an on-board lesson in this ancient Chinese sport that goes back more than 2,000 years.

Now a popular international racing sport, the standard crew consists of 20 paddlers, paired up a nd f ac i ng front. At the bow There are many moments sits a person who uses drumming to be savored or voice calls to in a sport issue commands that’s both fast to paddlers. In the and furious rear, a steersperson as well as or tiller uses a contemplative. long attached oar to steer the boat,

By CONNIE and also shouts MCDOUGALL commands.

Our boats were white, but come race days, they don colorful regalia, with the head of a dragon at the bow, a tail aft, and often, stylistic scales painted on the side.

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Left: Members of the Seattle SAKE Paddling Club turned out to help newcomers get a taste of dragon boating. Photo credit: NancyEllen Regier. Above: SAKE boardmember and dragon boat competitor Sandy Chock-Eng posed with her paddle in Vancouver, Canada, this last summer, where she competed with the club’s master women’s race team. Photo credit: Anne Lee.

We spent more than an hour practicing fast, slow, and stop paddling, while learning commands, my favorite being “let it run,” where the paddle rests on the boat’s edge. “Paddles up” prepares for the first stroke. “Finish, finish, finish” is a war cry to pick up the pace.

Head coach at the Seattle SAKE Paddling Club for the last seven years, Bland issues instructions with a charming Australian accent. She paddled for Australia in the 2004 Asian Title races, and both paddled and coached in Prague during the 2009 World Title races, as well as Macau in 2010. “Besides the camaraderie, travel is one of the things I most enjoy about the sport,” she says. “I’ve been to China, Thailand, Canada and Europe.”

Another appeal is accessibility. “It’s an easy entry-level sport for any level of fitness,” Bland notes. “There’s less impact on the joints, especially the knees.”

This makes dragon boating attractive to older adults, as reflected in the club’s membership, ranging in age from the 20s

Aging with Confidence

well into the 80s. Club board member and competitor Sandy Chock-Eng, 74, raced in Canada earlier this year and hopes to compete in Italy in 2024. “I got into it by accident about six years ago,” she says. “One of my friends suggested we try it and I took to it immediately.”

She’s a self-described “water person” who grew up in Hawaii paddling outriggers. “With dragon boats, it took about a year to really get the timing, the reach, and the flexibility down.”

Besides racing, the club also offers recreational dragon boating, standup paddle boarding, and outrigger canoeing.

“We take all abilities,” says Chock-Eng. “We’re very accepting and that’s what I love about our group. It’s welcoming.

One of our goals is this notion of care.”

For instance, there’s a Survivor SAKE team, an effort of Team Survivor Northwest, which offers programs for women cancer survivors. The SAKE team paddles for fun, but also enjoys competitive racing.

Chock-Eng was on the receiving end

of the club’s support last fall when she couldn’t paddle after shoulder surgery.

“It was around Christmas and Roula arranged this ’princess paddle’ for me and another member. They put us in the back, paddled into a cove, and we had doughnuts, Christmas treats and hot chocolate.”

There are many moments to be savored in a sport that’s both fast and furious as well as contemplative. “Sometimes we’ll go out as the sun is setting,” Chock-Eng says. “The water is like glass. Mount Rainier shines in the distance. You just can’t beat that.”

If You Go

The Seattle SAKE Paddling Club (ClubSake.com) offers free Dragon Boat 101 lessons in the spring and summer.

During fall and winter, beginners may participate in weekend paddles on Lake Washington. For more information, email info@clubsake.com.

Connie McDougall is a former news reporter and current freelance writer of nonfiction and personal essays. She lives in Seattle.

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MY THIRD ACT

Destination: Old Age

BY PRISCILLA LONG

In old age we need to develop cognitively.

To begin with, you must believe you can learn.

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I am in shock. In five months

I turn 80—I, who thought I would never live past 30. Still, I find myself rather pleased to be venturing into the country of old age. And what better way to bone up on a new destination than to write a book on it. My new book, Dancing with the Muse in Old Age, is just out. In researching it, I discovered so very many vibrant, amazing elders—many, though not all, active in the arts. As I navigate this new territory, they are my guides.

I once thought old age was about sitting around remembering. How ridiculous! Yes, we remember, at times vividly. But we also have goals—my main goal for the next 20 years is to write 10 more books. And we are exercising more—or know we ought to.

(I have bonded with my Fitbit.) And we know to reduce stress. Check. Connect with others. Check. Eat vegetables.

Check.

But the most mind-blowing thing I’ve learned has to do with learning— for brain heath, for entertainment, for

connection with others.

We now know how plastic the brain is, that the hippocampus, that body part essential for memory, can produce new neurons (brain cells), and grow thicker. We know that every time we learn something new, our brain adds to its zillions of connections.

And we also know that the brain is plastic the other way—lack of use causes neuron death, brain shrinkage.

The researcher Rachel Wu and her team at CALLA (Cognitive Agility Across the Lifespan via Learning and Attention) have added a new twist to the need to keep learning in old age.

It’s less about maintenance, more about cognitive development. Most middle-aged folks, however brilliant and high-functioning, are not learning much. They have become increasingly specialized, relying on experience and past learning. In middle age this is likely good enough, thank you very much. We are busy holding down a job, raising kids, getting the car fixed.

But cognitive development, Wu and her team have discovered, works in the elderly exactly as it does in children. To begin with, you must believe you can learn. To paraphrase the cosmetics entrepreneur Mary Kay Ash, if you believe you are too old to learn, you are right. It’s important to get input from the environment rather than drawing on past knowledge. This is about learning something new. It’s important to learn within a supportive environment, to see mistakes as part of learning. It’s important to learn in small steps, mastering one before

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proceeding to the next. It’s important to persist, to keep going when the going gets tough. And finally, Wu and her team advocate learning several things at once, as children and college students do.

Now, what has this got to do with me? It’s true that when I write a new piece or book I learn stuff, but isn’t this the kind of learning I’ve always done? In terms of my brain, how does learning about the history of writing differ from learning about the biology of salmon (considering two of my recent pieces)? I don’t know the answer, but I do already know how to research a piece.

So, what would steer my brain into truly exotic territory? The answer is obvious—math!

Here’s a subject about which I know zilch. Okay, I can count. I can even make change, which you do by counting up from the price to the amount handed over, which our father taught us children to do so we could go door to door selling strawberries.

Beyond that, I struggled with math.

Fast forward a few decades. In my mid-40s I began studying for the GRE in the process of applying to MFA programs in creative writing. And here comes math, my nemesis, back to haunt me. I studied and studied. Within a month I had advanced from the second grade to the fifth grade—pretty good!

—though I doubted an admissions committee would think so. Then the worst happened. I arrived at the test an hour late. So poorly do I perceive numbers that I read 12:10 as 1:12. I was heartbroken, my dream of entering an MFA program dashed. The application deadline preceded the next GRE test opportunity.

Three weeks later, with no GRE score, I received an acceptance letter.

Saved!

Aging with Confidence

Three more decades have passed.

Could I now actually learn math? I think of the Italian nonagenarian, Giuseppe Paterno. Growing up, Giuseppe loved to read, but life did not afford him an education past the eighth grade. He married, helped raise two children, and worked as a surveyor for the Italian railroad. At age 93 he entered college, but, within days, had serious doubts. Everyone else was so much younger! A dean encouraged him and before long he just blended in. At age 97, he graduated in history and philosophy at the top of his class.

He said, “My time at university has changed me for certain. It’s as if my brain has evolved. I’ve started to speak a different language. If I’m discussing the newspaper with my friends, I can articulate myself with greater precision… .”

So, it can be done. And if it can be done, perhaps I can do it. I have obtained a math book for innumerate adults.

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Priscilla Long has an MFA from the University of Washington. Author of seven books to date, she is a poet, science writer, and writer of creative nonfictions as well as fiction. A longtime independent teacher of writing, her how-to-write book is The Writer’s Portable Mentor. Her most recent book is Dancing with the Muse in Old Age (Epicenter/Coffeetown Press).

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fall 2022

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L E V A R TTRAVEL G N I R U DDURING T N E L TURBULENT URBU TTIMES TIMES

BY ANN RANDALL

Once vaccinated, I had two non-negotiables for travel in the time of COVID—minimize exposure by venturing to locales with low infection rates, plenty of DIY outdoor activities, self-catering accommodations, and easy access to testing and medical care. In short, replicate my successful home precautions. And the second: A contingency plan if I (or my travel companion) tested positive while on the trip.

My maiden venture, a March 2021 road trip exploring New Mexico’s archaeological sites, was so successful that seven months later I went further afield to central Mexico because their COVID practices and precautions exceed even Washington’s. Everyone

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masked up whether inside or out, businesses and attractions checked temperatures upon entry, and tourism was nearly non-existent.

A year later after booking a UK trip featuring rural days of hiking while staying in self-catering cottages, I was unexpectedly faced with the worldwide rush to normal. The UK suddenly rescinded its indoor mask requirement. Tour buses began unloading day-trippers into villages on my itinerary and accommodations— nearly empty when I’d reserved—were now fully booked. When I returned to the U.S. in May, air travel had become a mayhem of flight cancellations, lost luggage, and crowds. Along with hundreds of other passengers I was herded down overcrowded hallways to clear Chicago O’Hare’s understaffed passport control. Five days later, I tested positive for COVID. Meanwhile, my social media has been filled with updates from retired Puget Sound area friends. Their long-delayed trips finally realized. Curious, I asked how they made their own risk-benefit travel calculation and found they had a lot in common when it came to personal responsibility, risk tolerance, and flexibility.

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“We have a limited number of years when we’ll be healthy enough to travel independently and COVID erased two years of that from our lives,” Rod Regan and Margaret Knight explained. “We believe in science, so the vaccines and boosters gave us some confidence that we’d be safe traveling in Spain and Portugal.”

Still, they didn’t roam carte blanche this past spring.

“Even though the mask requirement had been lifted or was not being enforced, we masked up indoors and ate outside whenever possible.”

Despite their precautions, Knight tested positive in Portugal. “We had to change our plans and didn’t go everywhere we intended, which was disappointing,” she wrote. “My main concern was that I’d get COVID again or have ongoing symptoms triggering positive tests so I couldn’t fly home.”

Mary Lindquist and Peter Bogdanoff didn’t change their destination because their COVID-delayed plans felt safe. “We hiked the Minster Way in England and patted ourselves on the back that for that week we would be safely outside and largely alone,” they explained.

But the pandemic factored into their daily logistics.

“We minimized the risks by renting a car for two weeks in Ireland and accepted that when we took plane and train rides, used the London Tube, or shopped at grocery stores, it would be risky even wearing masks.

We avoided crowded restaurants, museums, and other indoor sights, except in Dingle when we simply had to crowd into pubs to see the Irish national fast dancer champion and listen to some traditional music.”

For Lynn and Irving Baugh, there was comfort in having a tour company handle some of the COVID logistics and safety. They’d planned tours to five countries, all postponed until 2022. “The companies sent regular updates regarding COVID requirements and protocols before our trips,” they wrote. “We were required to mask up on tour buses. We tried to keep social distances when outside and used hand wipes and sanitizer frequently. Four members on one of our tours tested positive, so then we tested daily with home test kits.”

The couple also did their own research and were prepared to pivot. “We monitored the cases, country vaccination rates, State Department bulletins, and available medical care in case we were forced to quarantine. Our health care providers encouraged us to have adequate travel insurance because we have underlying health conditions. This fall we’ve planned

Aging with Confidence

a cruise to South America and are concerned about cruise ship outbreaks cases. We’ll postpone the trip if we feel unsafe.”

By December 2021, Peg Garrison felt she could safely cruise again with ship protocols and her own precautions in place. “I had a lot of credit from COVID-cancelled cruises, so I chose one down the Mexican Riviera from San Diego because it required a shorter roundtrip flight from Seattle,” she said after her return. “All cruise passengers had to present a negative test prior to boarding and wear appropriate masks while moving inside “WE HAVE A the ship. Even in the dining room everyone LIMITED NUMBER wore a mask and then OF YEARS took them off when WHEN WE’LL BE seated. I splurged for HEALTHY ENOUGH a balcony so if there was a breakout and we TO TRAVEL were relegated to our INDEPENDENTLY staterooms, I could AND COVID ERASED get outside. I also didn’t disembark at TWO YEARS OF one port that felt too THAT FROM OUR crowded.”

My intrepid friends LIVES.” all have upcoming 2022 travel plans (as do I) and offer this additional advice: • Given the way airplanes and public transportation jam people together, be fully vaccinated and boosted.

• Research and make educated decisions about where and how to travel, then do your own riskbenefit analysis.

• Slow down and stay put if you feel sick.

• Be flexible. Tourist-related businesses are still recovering.

• But do travel. You don’t have as much time left as you think!

This advice is good guidance even in nonturbulent times.

Ann Randall is a freelance writer, organizational consultant, and independent traveler who loves venturing to out-of-the-way locales, from Azerbaijan to Zimbabwe. Retired from a career as a teacher and union organizer in public education, she now observes international elections, does volunteer work in India, and writes regularly for 3rd Act, Northwest Travel & Life, West Sound Home & Garden, Fibre Focus, and Dutch the Magazine.

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Accepting that human beings are wired to travel and trade, to appropriate and quarrel, I would like to argue for the opposite. I would like to sing the praises of staying put.

We are in our garden, e n te r t a i n i n g f r i e n d s .

Prosecco has been poured.

Topics ensue—the astonishing political and cultural events beyond our understanding or control, our slightly more manageable issues of health, remembered vagaries and pleasures of travel. Leaning forward, Bob asks enthusiastically, “Where would you like to go?” We’re all a little COVID crazed, you see, after 2+ years of restrictions.

Nevertheless, I launch a contrarian stay-put screed, for those restrictions encouraged me to think about why I want—or at times in my life wanted to—travel, and I recalled my reasons often to be stupid or vain like creating memories, inspiring envy, competing with friends, acquiring stories.

Accepting that human beings are wired to travel and trade, to appropriate and quarrel, I would like to argue for the opposite. I would like to sing the praises of staying put. Over a span of 20 years, my wife and I have made this garden our sanctuary, which we sit in now, sipping our Prosecco under a towering canopy of Maple and sprawling Viburnum, whose drifts and angles echo an Utagawa Hiroshige wood block print. Why, I ask our guests, leave this hard-won paradise to travel? This visit in the garden brings to mind Thoreau.

A sensible, if philosophic fellow, he tried heroically to act in alignment with his values, and mostly did quite well. This made him prickly and impatient with America’s fervid ethos to progress, and tellingly, his life spanned two epochs—that of the colonial era farm and the Industrial Revolution, or the beginning of what we now call the Anthropocene. While Walden Pond was well within reach of town life—the railway skirted along one bank edge, fences could be seen along another—those two worlds, like the two epochs, offered a balance between solitude and social engagement. Thoreau’s sojourn at The Pond revealed the virtues of a crafted solitude rooted in nature. For two years and two months Walden Pond was his performance piece.

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An experiment in the principled uses of freedom, his performance focused on their exercise after the necessities of food, clothing, and shelter have been met. In a society defined by the right to freedoms, its citizens, one might opine, are obliged to use them well. Americans are, with those precious freedoms, entitled to do so many things—shoot people, consume willy nilly, unobliged to recognize the impact our behaviors have on animals, the environment, and each other. Conversely, we are free to live wisely and in tune with nature.

In this context, I try to understand my reluctance to travel. It’s not that I want to do nothing or go nowhere or disengage. More and more, I just require

Travel meaning—if you tell me you’re taking a trip to the moon in mid-July, I will have to ask you, “Why?” Are you trying to inspire me or inspire envy?

It wasn’t always like this. I had my list, as many of us do—the must-see places: Patagonia for Darwin and the stars; Scotland for the rocks and whiskey.

But the unique pressures exerted by the climate crisis have made my relationship to travel queasy.

To check off the items on my list, as motive, is no longer justified. That said, I have had my place at that table and I cannot deny you yours.

Once, I would have hitchhiked most anywhere without qualm. It was simply done then, back in the 60s and 70s. I’d haul some then best friend and off we’d go—from Pennsylvania to Toronto, Amsterdam to Dublin. It would not occur to us—young women, giddy with the belief in our invincibility, and in a friendly world—that this was patently risky. Can you imagine? Doing that now would summon violence and transgression, and any young woman poking her thumb out onto the highway would have to be out of her mind. Is my preference to stay put a

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Reconsidered

BY HOLLIS GIAMMATTEO

triumph of anxiety or the adjustment to my more limited means?

Here is the evidence of my aging—complaining joints, impaired vision, the sudden pain from an otherwise innocent shift in my position. I am more comfort than journey bound, and my diminished appetite for travel reflects these physical crumblings. And yet I know of women in their late 70s and 80s still avid for travel, keen to experience treks in wilderness areas and to invite new knowledge and quickened senses. Am I a weenie or am I wise? This concerns me.

“Bob,” I answer, having delivered my cranky, if politically correct screed, “putting aside the knowledge that travel is not without its issues, I have to tell you—we are going to Scotland in September!”

The faces of our guests brighten. We’re back on solid ground. How wonderful, they say. And yes, it is. I have always wanted to go to Scotland.

I know half a dozen facts about my birth father,

Aging with Confidence

and his Scottish origin is one. This is my motivating bit of meaning. They will go to Portugal, also in September.

I have always wanted to go there, too. There will never be an end to “I have always wanted to . . .”

Perhaps this is a good thing, the wanting in this case less reflective of the acquisitive appetites than an affirmation of wonderful, ongoing curiosity. But may that curiosity be trained on the reasons for going, and urge us to rethink travel—its appeal, its extravagance, its healthy challenges, and colorful vacuities. Our garden is, after all, a park. We’ve made it so, after 20 years. This factors into the equation of when it’s sensible to travel.

A practicing Buddhist for more than 30 years, Hollis Giammatteo has sought experiences that challenge her practice, from teaching writing to working with the elderly.

She co-founded The Wilma Theater in Philadelphia, and was a resident playwright for The Rhode Island Feminist Theatre.

Giammatteo has published in a variety of magazines and her memoir, The Shelf Life of Ashes, was released in 2016 by She Writes Press.

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the

Reluctant Traveler The push of adventure, the pull of safety by Don Akchin

I know I am not a good traveler and I know I am getting worse as I age. I once derived great pleasure from visits to new places, encounters with new people, and plates of exotic new foods. But these days travel isn’t even mildly tempting. When I weigh the realities of transporting myself and luggage across unknown terrain against the familiar comforts of domestic bliss, bliss wins hands down. And that’s before even considering the indignities of airport security!

Not that any of that matters. My wife was going to New York City on a Monday to meet a business colleague. She suggested we both take the train up the Friday before and have a weekend getaway and, by the way, visit our daughter. The first time she suggested it, I resisted. She sweetened the deal by pointing out exhibitions on display at two museums. I couldn’t deny that one of those exhibits interested me quite a bit, but still I resisted. Eventually, however, bowing to the inevitable—and having no credible rationale for begging off—I finally caved.

Emerging from the Cave I also suspected, deep down, that it might be good for me to emerge from my cave once in a while. I’ve read enough to know that leaving one’s comfort zone and taking on new challenges is good for mind, body, and likely, lifespan. Easy to say, hard to do.

We set out by train. Just to make it more interesting, we picked a weekend that coincided with a major snowstorm. Based on the predictions, we thought we could arrive and settle in before the blizzard struck. We were right.

By all outward measures, the trip was a great success. Our daughter, who has lived in New York for 10 years now, is a bona fide subway sherpa. Through the twisting underground caverns beneath Manhattan and Queens, she guided us skillfully to the museums, a movie theater, and two ethnic restaurants. Our accommodations, courtesy of a longtime friend, were convenient and comfortable.

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On the inside, however, I was a wreck. Every moment brought another reminder that I was cut off from my familiar routines. Every moment was a direct confrontation with the unexpected and the strange.

Breakfast? We brought a substitute for my regular cereal, but not almonds to top it. I can have a chai latte if I insist, but to get it I’ll have to trudge through snow-glazed sidewalks for three blocks to find it. Email? Yes, I can read it on my laptop, which I rarely use because it requires struggling with a funky, yet oversensitive, touchpad in place of a sturdy mouse.

Overstimulation We ventured out in sub-freezing temperatures. In our heavy boots we sloshed down semi-cleared sidewalks and stepped over low mounds of melting snow mush at each street corner. Always on the cautious side, we wore our masks outdoors. With slow, careful steps we descended icy stairs to subway stations. Once inside, we confronted multiple choice quizzes demanding immediate answers. Uptown Bronx or Downtown Brooklyn? How much is on my fare card? In fact, where is my fare card?

Between gloves, cold, and rummaging through coat pockets with steamed eyewear, I managed to lose two fare cards in three days.

The constant barrage of sights, sounds, and decisions takes its toll.

Half of my brain shuts down. I lose all sense of where I am and what I’m doing. I am tempest-tossed. I have to be led around by my companions like a horse wearing blinders. Luckily for me, my daughter knows the way, and my wife’s brain is of hardier stuff.

But of course I survive, nerves fried to a crisp but otherwise more or less unbroken. The other half of

Aging with Confidence

my brain is back in service, and I am safely ensconced in the coziness of my familiar cave.

The Trap Given the mental anguish of travel, it is far easier for me to hibernate in comfortable surroundings where I can perform all my OCD routines in their time and place. I also know that there lies early death. It is a trap. If I am to age well, I must have the courage to leave the cave sometimes, to connect with other people in real time. I know it is important to my mental acuity to be curious, to explore, to want to venture out, to refuse to be satisfied with the familiar and the proven. Yet that is exactly that which I crave—at least, at this moment. I want to sit still until the world stops spinning, until every moment stops posing a fresh challenge of the unknown. I need time to restore equilibrium.

Then once I feel solidly on terra firma again, perhaps I will be ready to venture out. But not another major travel excursion right away. We could begin small, with a trip to the grocery, a visit to an old friend, a walk in the park. Like Thoreau, who was well traveled in Concord, I can find a multitude of curiosities close to home.

My spiritual adviser has suggested a breathing technique to ease the overwhelming feelings when I feel overstimulated. I will practice it to use when I can summon the courage to travel again.

In fact, I need to summon it by April, when my wife has booked us on another trip.

Don Akchin’s third act career is publishing The EndGame (https://theendgame. substack.com/), a newsletter and podcast about positive aging with joy and purpose. His previous careers included newspaper reporter, magazine editor, marketing communications writer, marketing executive, and communications consultant for nonprofits. He resides in Baltimore, Maryland.

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The Cape Flattery Tribal Scenic Byway The first Native American scenic byway in the United States begins on a winding coastal Olympic Peninsula road abutting the Strait of Juan de Fuca, the Salish Sea’s outlet to the Pacific Ocean. Created by a 2002 agreement between the Makah Tribe, who has inhabited the land since time immemorial, and the Washington State Transportation Commission, the final 12 miles of SR 112 located on Makah land is known as the Cape Flattery Tribal Scenic Byway.

Beginning at the entrance to the Makah Reservation, the road winds through the town of Neah Bay and ends at a parking lot for Cape Flattery Trail, the northwestern point of the lower 48.

While the byway offers jaw-dropping landscape, the journey also encourages an understanding of the Makah people, a Washington tribe whose history and culture are shaped by a rugged marine coastline, whaling and fishing traditions guaranteed by an 1855 treaty, and the 1970 unearthing of one of the tribe’s traditional villages. The excavation of Ozette village redefined both state archaeology and tribal rights.

On the route’s front porch there is a pullout at the reservation entrance sign where a break in the treeline offers STATE ROAD

112

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Travel the country’s first Native American scenic byway STORY AND PHOTOS BY ANN RANDALL

a view of Sail and Seal Rocks. The two offshore features in the Strait of Juan de Fuca are popular feeding grounds for juvenile gray whales and sea lions that sun themselves on the rock perches.

Neah Bay is home to the renowned Museum at the Makah Culture and Research Center. It’s worth devoting a couple of hours to wander the thoughtfully curated introduction to the land, history, and culture of the Makah. Designed by tribal members and an internationally recognized museum architect, the facility serves multiple purposes.

It was built to house artifacts from Ozette, some more than 2,000 years old. Located on a beach 15 miles south of Neah Bay, Ozette was buried under a mudslide until exposed by tidal erosion in 1970. Eleven years of excavation by the tribe and archaeologists from Washington State University recovered more than 55,000 artifacts, many of them perfectly preserved, with 500 of them displayed at the museum, and the rest in the museum’s repository. Additionally, the museum www.3rdActMag.com

DISCOVER NORTHWEST

contains a longhouse, displays of modern basketry and cedar canoes used in whaling and fishing, all exhibited according to Makah seasonal practices. The facility also serves as a research center allowing current generations of tribal members and non-tribal experts the opportunity to study Ozette artifacts to renew traditional art, practices, and the Makah language.

Fort Nunez Goana–Diah Veterans Park is a small beachfront monument commemorating both Makah veterans and a short-lived fort built in 1792 by Spanish colonists hoping to give Spain a base to protect political and commercial interests in the area. Though the settlement had a church, bakery, infirmary, housing, corrals, and a garden, it was a tense occupation of Makah land. The Spanish abandoned the fort four months after building it.

Popular Hobuck Beach Resort is a tribally owned enterprise with oceanfront cabins, an RV park, and tent camping. It offers plenty of beach exploration, surfing the possibility of spotting some of the 239 species of year-round and seasonal birds that inhabit the area.

The end of the byway opens to one of the most breathtaking coastal scenes in the United States—the Cape Flattery Trail. The 1.5-mile roundtrip hike follows boardwalk and gravel to four observation decks where visitors can view the confluence of the Pacific Ocean and the Strait of Juan de Fuca, sea caves, and the 20-acre Tatoosh Island. The island was the site of a Makah summer village and today houses a lighthouse and the remains of an old weather station.

Fall and winter bring unique recreational and cultural opportunities. On the weekend closest to August 26, the tribe celebrates Makah Days commemorating August 26, 1913, when the U.S. government conferred citizenship on tribal members. October is the Hobuck Paddle Surf Festival.

Several tribally owned fishing and whale watching charters operate out of Neah Bay’s port, while November to March is the best time to witness winter storm waves.

Like other tribes in Washington, the Makah have sovereign nation status and can establish regulations governing tribal land and expectations for guests. In 2020, the reservation and byway were closed to non-tribal members for two years to reduce the spread of COVID. A Tribal Recreational Use Permit, available at various locations in Neah Bay, is required for access to recreational areas including all public beaches and trails. Alcohol, marijuana, and all illegal drugs are forbidden, as are the removal of cultural natural resources including plants, animals, and shellfish.

Be mindful of visitor protocol during your journey but also know the word Makah refers to the tribe’s reputation for hospitality reflected in its tourism greeting: “Welcome to the beginning of the world and the home of the Makah—the Cape People.”

Ann Randall is a freelance writer, organizational consultant, and independent traveler who loves venturing to out-of-the-way locales, from Azerbaijan to Zimbabwe. Retired from a career as a teacher and union organizer in public education, she now observes international elections, does volunteer work in India, and writes regularly for 3rd Act, Northwest Travel & Life, West Sound Home & Garden, Fibre Focus, and Dutch the Magazine.

Facing page: Cape Flattery is the northwesternmost point of the contiguous United States. This page clockwise from top right: The renowned museum at the Makah Culture and Research Center; cabins at Hobuck Beach Resort; welcome statues carved by Makah carver Greg Colfax.

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no matter where you live, you can find experiences within a reasonable distance by car that will provide you with new insights and new landscapes—and all without the need of a passport!

A good place to look for exciting travel ideas is a tourism bureau. Every state, including Washington, has one. To start you off, here are four directions on which to set your sights. Think of them as the North, East, South, and West of easy and fun discovery!

North: New Terrain

In these pandemic times, if you’re reluctant to travel abroad but still yearn to explore the world, opportunities to expand your horizons are nearer to home than you think.

There’s no doubt about it: The COVID pandemic has made many of us, regardless of our vaccination and booster status, reluctant to travel on vacation via plane or other form of mass transportation.

This can make visiting many foreign locations out of the question. And yet, we still want to explore unfamiliar places and cultures. Perhaps you feel this way, too.

So what can you do?

As the French author Marcel Proust once wrote, “The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.” Fortunately,

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One of the most obvious options for exploration is to visit a place that’s geographically different from where you live.

Are you a city dweller? Then consider venturing out to rural areas, especially those orchards and farms where you can pick your own fruits and vegetables. You might also check out some of the more than 1,000 wineries in the state where you can see how the local grape varieties are grown and harvested—and taste the results.

If you live along the coast, take a trip to the mountains, or vice versa. In other words, literally seek out a change of scenery. Washington’s state and national parks offer countless opportunities for camping, fishing, hiking, and other kinds of outdoor recreation. And if you feel particularly adventurous, you can tour Gardner Cave in Crawford State Park or bike the Cascade Trail.

Of course, if you already live in a rural area, treat yourself to a day trip or a stay in Seattle, Spokane, Tacoma, or another city, where artistic, cultural, and culinary experiences await to delight you.

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For the handicrafter in you, there’s the Pacific Northwest Quilt and Fiber Arts Museum, housed in the 1891 Gaches Mansion in La Conner, which exhibits work by national and international fiber artists, and hosts the Quilt & Fiber Arts Festival each October.

East: Ethnic Festivals

Photo courtesy American Car Museum

South: Specialty Museums & Fairs Of course, you may want to do a different kind of long-distance exploration—traveling back in time. If that strikes your fancy, you can catch the last weekend of the Washington Midsummer Renaissance Fair in Bonney Lake and enjoy jousting, dancing, and other revelry in the fantasy town of Merriwick.

For a living history experience closer to home, consider a visit to Tacoma’s Fort Nisqually to experience what life was like at a fur-trading outpost in 1855. Or visit the Maritime Heritage Center in Anacortes and climb aboard the W.T. Preston, the last sternwheeler to work in Puget Sound.

If you enjoy viewing collections of one kind or another, depending on your interests, there may be a nearby specialty museum with you in mind. Consider these examples: Are vintage cars your thing? If so, you’ll want to visit LeMay–America’s Car Museum in Tacoma, housing 300+ domestic and foreign cars going back as far as a century.

Are you a Bing Crosby fan? Check out the crooner’s boyhood house in Spokane on the campus of his alma mater, Gonzaga University, where you can view more than 200 objects, including photos, paintings, his gold records, and the Oscar he won for the 1944 film, Going My Way.

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If for now you are opting not to venture to foreign lands, that doesn’t mean you can’t explore their art, music, dance, customs, and food. Going to ethnic festivals is a great way to bring those cultural gems to you.

As it turns out, one place offers a cornucopia of such experiences. The Seattle Center Festál presents 24 free in-person, virtual, or hybrid festivals throughout the year, including Arabian, Brazilian, Tibetan, Italian, Latin American, Hmong, and Irish celebrations. Needless to say, its 2022 theme, “Where the World Gathers,” is an understatement.

West: Worship Experiences Visiting any of the aforementioned places most likely requires you to get in your car and drive at least some distance. But one form of exploration—of the spiritual kind—may be within walking distance of your home.

This may sound like a strange option, but think about this: We will eagerly make plans to spend our time, money, and energy traveling to other countries and, upon our return, (CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)

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as you navigate planning your current travel.

Wherever your not-so-distant explorations take you in these ever-challenging times, know that there are lots of enriching experiences awaiting you. And the great news is, you don’t need a passport. All that’s required is the Proustian adventurous urge to see these landscapes through “new eyes.”

Happy travels!

Jeanette Leardi is a Portland-based social gerontologist, writer, editor, and community educator who has a passion for older adult empowerment.

She gives popular presentations and workshops in journaling, memoir writing, ethical will creation, brain fitness, creativity, ageism, intergenerational communication, and caregiver support to people of all ages. Learn more about her work at jeanetteleardi.com.

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(CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS PAGE) eagerly share our experiences with family and friends. But attend services in unfamiliar houses of worship and make such visits an occasional or regular practice? That thought may never enter our minds.

Yet, if the point of travel is to expand our understanding of the world, setting foot inside a church, temple, mosque, shrine, or other form of sanctuary can be a fascinating, insightful, and rewarding experience. All one needs is a curious mind and an open heart.

In addition to houses of worship in your area, you might want to consider other Washington sites and organizations such as the Tsubaki Grand Shrine of America, a Jinja Shinto sacred site in Granite Falls; the Sravasti Abbey, a Buddhist monastery in Newport; the Muslim Association of Puget Sound in Redmond; and the Hindu Temple and Cultural Center in Bothell.

It goes without saying that this kind of journey involves an awareness of etiquette, more than the basic kind that we should display when we are visitors in a foreign country. Spiritual places require greater conscientiousness and respect. It’s helpful to contact in advance the house of worship you are planning to visit. Ask about any specific requirements of clothing and behavior. To make the visit extra special as an educational experience, consider attending the service with someone you know who practices that religion.

So there you have it, four directions to ponder

3rd Act magazine | fall 2022

Want to Know More?

For additional information about the places mentioned, check out these websites: State of Washington Tourism www.stateofwatourism.com/ Washington State U-Pick Farms www.pickyourown.org/WA.htm Washington Wine www.washingtonwine.org/ Washington State Parks www.parks.wa.gov/ Rails-to-Trails Conservancy–Trail Link www.traillink.com/trail/cascade-trail/ Visit Seattle www.visitseattle.org/ Visit Spokane www.visitspokane.com/ Travel Tacoma www.traveltacoma.com/ Seattle Center Festál www.seattlecenter.com Bing Crosby House www.gonzaga.edu Pacific Northwest Quilt and Fiber Arts Museum www.qfamuseum.org/ Tsubaki Grand Shrine of America www.tsubakishrine.org/ Sravasti Abbey ravastiabbey.org Muslim Association of Puget Sound mapsredmond.org/

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Every Walk a Discovery

BY JANICE KING

During the recent years of pandemic constraints and travel wariness, we learned to satisfy our exploratory spirit with walks close to home. But how can we find the joy of discovery in territory that has become too familiar? As I walked through this time, several tips made for an engaging and renewing experience.

Walk with full attention. Have you noticed some people treat walking as just a chore to get done while they scroll through their phones? Carry your phone for safety, but keep it in a pocket so you can remain fully present in your walk. It will also be easier to enjoy the benefits of relaxation, meditation, creative inspiration, and deeper connection to places that walking brings.

Consciously connect. If you are walking with a companion, it’s easy to get caught up in the conversation. Take a break at a bench or picnic table to simply enjoy the day, notice what is around you, and appreciate the experience of being together.

Learn about the nature you see, hear, and smell. You will find a wide variety of trees and plants to explore along neighborhood streets and nature trails, or in a city park.

Check for local guidebooks or identification apps to help you understand the many natural elements that can be found in your area.

Discover public art. Many communities place murals, sculptures, and other artworks on government buildings, parks, and transit centers—even parking garages! Commercial

Aging with Confidence

buildings may have their own art installations or interesting architectural features. Enjoy viewing these artworks as if at an outdoor gallery or museum.

Read the history signs and plaques. This tip can feel a bit like a scavenger hunt, as history signs often escape notice. Yet, their stories and photos offer an interesting sense of life in earlier times, and they may help you spot aspects of that life that remain today.

Get to know a local small business. An independent coffee shop, an owner-run retail store, a restaurant built from the work of family—all are businesses that help you connect with community on a walk.

Say hello. If it feels safe to do so, say hello to the people you pass. Not all of them will respond. But every so often, you will see how that simple act really brightens someone’s day … and yours.

Walking may be the simplest exercise and it may seem to lead nowhere very interesting. But with a little attention to what you find along the way, any walk can become a wonderfully fresh experience.

Janice King is author of Eastside Seattle Walks and a leader of guided walks in Seattle’s eastern suburbs.

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FOOD FOR THOUGHT

The Deep Taste:

Explorations in Umami

BY REBECCA CRICHTON

M

y daughter’s first step was to reach a strawberry held at her eye level 2 feet away. We clapped enthusiastically as she reached her goal. The word “more” was among her first words, accompanied by pointing at the artichoke heart soaked in melted butter on my plate after she had gobbled her own. I refused, perhaps the first rejection of her life. Her daycare teacher, British-born and proper, asked about the strange food packed in her daily lunch bag, commenting

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that she sometimes sniffed garlic when she bent to hug her. The foods: hummus and baba ghanoush, along with other “exotic” food. She ate anchovies straight and gobbled pickles of varying kinds long before most adults encounter those foods.

She had no choice in being introduced to foods that spanned the full range of flavors. Despite still resorting to boxed macaroni and cheese for comfort, she has become a creative and inventive cook.

Before writing this issue’s column,

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knowing the overall theme for the fall is “risk,” I started asking people what qualified as risk regarding food.

The answers were somewhat predictable: foods from unfamiliar cultures, so-called “weird” foods such as insects and animals’ eyes, too much hot spice or other ingredients that hindered digestion. One person mentioned prices on a menu as a risk for a tight budget.

Recently, I have thought about the risk of not knowing how to eat a particular food in settings where it is assumed you know what to do. Foods in this category include whole artichokes, fish with bones, fresh oysters, large crustaceans. It’s a subject that elicits funny and occasionally poignant stories.

The realm of “foods I don’t know how to use and think I dislike” seemed worth exploring. Thus, I chose two foods that can add to your cooking palate with surprisingly rewarding results.

Most people can reel off the original four elements of taste our tongues detect—sweet, bitter, salty and sour.

Together, they combine to give the nuanced flavors to what we eat.

For the past several decades what’s considered the fifth taste—umami— has become familiar to most cooks.

Umami is the Japanese word that translates as “pleasant, savory taste.”

English attempts at translation include “savoriness” and “yum.”

Umami is associated with meat, mushrooms, soy sauce and other ingredients that lay down a base note for other flavors to harmonize with.

Two easy ways to experiment with umami are anchovies and miso.

Once you’ve begun to use them in the following recipes and suggestions, you will see why good cooks always have their umami at hand!

Rebecca Crichton is executive director of Northwest Center for Creative Aging and presents programs on that topic in the Seattle area.

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Anchovies

Many people have strong feelings about anchovies—you either love them or you hate them. While they refuse them in Caesar salads and on pizza, feeling confident that they won’t show up anywhere else, they might be wrong to discover how many ways they have enjoyed their benefit without knowing it!

Anchovy Primer Canned in oil: Most canned anchovies are imported. Prices differ, and you’ll get a lot of flavor and use from one small tin.

Bottled in olive oil: Often Italian, you can see them standing tall in their little jars.

Boquerones: These white, fresh anchovies are pickled in vinegar and oil and usually need refrigeration.

They are milder in flavor and terrific on an antipasto spread.

Anchovy paste: Packaged in tubes, this is the no-fuss way to get a hit of anchovy in salad dressings, sauces, or compound butters.

Asian fish sauce: Fish sauces use fermented anchovies as a base. A few drops in salad dressing will be transformative and nobody will know what you’ve done.

The recipes below honor the Mediterranean roots of this ancient ingredient.

Pasta with Garlic, Anchovies, Capers and Red Pepper • • • •

½ pound spaghetti Salt 3 tbsp. extra virgin olive oil 4 anchovy filets, rinsed and roughly chopped • 1 tbsp. capers, rinsed and roughly chopped • ½ tsp. red pepper flakes, or to taste • 2 tbsp. chopped parsley, optional • Grated parmesan cheese, optional Put the spaghetti in a large pot of well-salted rapidly boiling water and cook only until al dente. (Depending on the brand of pasta, this will be 8 to 10 minutes, but check frequently.)

While the pasta is cooking, warm the olive oil in a small skillet over medium heat. Add the garlic and cook for about 1 minute, without letting it brown. Stir in the anchovies, capers, and red pepper and cook for 30 seconds more, then turn off heat.

Drain the pasta and return it to the pot. Pour in the garlic mixture, add parsley, if using, and toss well to coat. Serve with grated Parmesan cheese.

Serves 2

Fast Tomato Sauce with Anchovies • 2 tbsp. extra virgin olive oil • 1 tsp. minced garlic • 4 to 6 anchovy fillets, with some of their oil • 1 28-ounce can tomatoes, crushed or chopped, and drained of their juice • Salt and fresh-ground black pepper Put the olive oil in a deep skillet and turn the heat to medium. A minute later, add the garlic and the anchovies, and stir. When the garlic sizzles and the anchovies break up, add the tomatoes.

Turn heat to medium-high and bring to a boil. Cook, stirring occasionally, until mixture becomes saucy, about 15 minutes.

Enough for 1 pound of pasta, or about 4 servings.

I would also use this as topping for pizza, an addition to anything wanting a deep tomato taste.

Pissaladière (for cheaters) If you have ever been in the South of France, you likely recall this pizza-like tart that comes out of ovens right before lunch. Here’s an easy way to make your own.

• Start with a sturdy dough (focaccia, pizza dough, or a thick layer of puff pastry) • Spread thick layer of caramelized onions • A pinch of fresh thyme and rosemary adds to the flavor profile.

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are distributed evenly enough so that each piece—square or wedge—has its share.

• Distribute black olives among the anchovies.

• Drizzle good olive oil over everything.

Bake at 400 degrees for 20 minutes until dough is brown and top is bubbling.

Optional additions: Roasted red peppers, sun-dried tomatoes, or fresh tomatoes.

Maple Miso Glazed Black Cod • • • • • •

8 ounces black cod fillet, halved 2 tbsp. white miso paste 1 tbsp. pure maple syrup 1 tsp. rice vinegar 1 tbsp. sherry, sake, or orange juice 1 tsp. fresh grated ginger (or ₁⁄₄ tsp. powder) • Pinch red pepper flakes Slice the fish into two equal pieces.

Pat dry and set aside.

In a small bowl, whisk the remaining ingredients until smooth. Add the fillets and turn to coat. Place the glazed fillets on a small baking sheet, skin side down. You can marinate the fish for as little as half an hour or up to 24 hours. The longer you leave it, the deeper the flavors.

Broil on high 7-8 minutes.

Serves 2

Miso Salad Dressing

Miso

Miso is a fermented paste made with soybeans and rice or barley that provides a direct hit of umami to many dishes. Start with white miso, mildest of the pastes—there is also yellow and red—and you will be surprised at what it adds to marinades, salad dressings, bastes and sauces.

Here’s some ways to incorporate miso into other flavors or bases.

This is a basic miso-based salad dressing to toss with lots of things (consider shredded cabbage or bok choi—raw, it’s crunchy and fresh— carrots, or fennel). Add cut up apples or pears, sprinkle with nuts and sesame seeds, and you’ll have an easy Asian-inspired salad.

• 1 tbsp. light soy sauce • 1 tbsp. rice wine • 1 tbsp. cider vinegar • 2 tbsp. white miso Mix until blended.

Miso-Compound Butter Make a log of miso-compound butter to melt or spread over proteins and steamed vegetables. You can add garlic or chives, and lemon juice or zest.

• 4 tbsp. (1/2 stick) room temperature butter • 2 tbsp. miso (white or yellow) • Ground pepper Optional add-ins: Chopped scallions or chives, minced or crushed garlic, crushed fresh ginger or chili, citrus juices or citrus zest.

Cream butter and miso, adding other ingredients as you wish.

Use immediately or roll into a log in plastic wrap and refrigerate or freeze to cut into slices for later use.

Melt onto fish, chicken or steak (lots of umami), asparagus, broccoli or carrots, or a baked potato or sweet potato.

2-3 tbsp. miso plus: Sweet element: brown sugar, maple syrup, palm sugar, marmalade Sour element: rice vinegar, balsamic vinegar, lemon, lime or orange juice Spices and herbs: ginger, cilantro, garlic, lemon or lime zest This is a version of the famous miso glaze for black cod used by Nobu Matsuhisa, a legendary New York chef and restaurateur. It is easy and superb on other fish, as well as steamed or roasted vegetables, chicken, or tofu.

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winter winter fall2020 2020 2022 | 3rd 3rd Act Act magazine magazine

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ON THE TOWN Atticus Finch in the courtroom – Richard Thomas (“Atticus Finch”) and The Company of To Kill a Mockingbird. Below: Tom Robinson on the stand – Yaegel T. Welch (“Tom Robinson”). Photos by Julieta Cervantes

THE RETURN OF INDOOR THEATRE

AROUND THE SOUND

BY MISHA BERSON

To state the obvious, it has been a couple of rocky years for theaters in the Seattle region.

The pandemic meant cancelled productions and scratched subscription campaigns. And it caused confusion over how (and when) to offer plays and musicals live onstage—yet minimize the spread of the virus among the actors and audience members.

Some companies created theatrical Zoom attractions, with limited success.

But the essence of theater, for the actors and the audiences, is the intimacy and immediacy of gathering together in

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person to watch what playwright Oscar Wilde described as an event “in which a human being can share with another the sense of what it is to be a human being.”

Though ensuring the health of all concerned is still a challenge, the dissemination of vaccines, a decline in the severity of cases, and more knowledge of how to mitigate the spread of the disease inspired some theaters in the area to host spring and summer shows indoors.

And now more companies are moving forward by scheduling a broad array of live shows for autumn and beyond. (Note that each theater has developed its own

COVID protocols. When you buy a ticket, just ask.)

Since nonprofit theaters rely heavily on box office receipts for their continuing existence, going on with the show is not just a rallying cry—it is a matter of survival. And it is also a boon to the many local residents who have enjoyed live theater, to those not yet exposed to www.3rdActMag.com

Scout, Jem and Dill discover the dolls - Steven Lee Johnson (“Dill Harris”), Melanie Moore (“Scout Finch”) and Justin Mark (“Jem Finch”). Photo by Julieta Cervantes

it, and to patrons who will be playing a critical role in helping the theatrical culture of the Northwest continue and thrive.

So consider a few productions on the calendar soon. And note that many theaters have discount ticket programs for seniors and students, as well as lastminute admissions and pay-what-youcan options.

Some shows that pique my interest this fall include: Choir Boy. ACT Theatre’s season opener is a rendition of an award-winning work

by Tarell Alvin McCraney, a lauded stage and screenwriter who scripted the Oscarwinning film Moonlight, among other achievements.

This potent Broadway work depicts the emotionally and sexually charged atmosphere of a Black all-male boarding school, where an embattled gay student finds his niche and self-confidence as the leader of the school’s prized gospel choir. The show is bolstered by rousing music and exciting displays of stepping, a percussive Black movement form derived from African dance.

Choir Boy at ACT Theatre, September 9–October 23. Information: www. acttheatre.org Aging with Confidence

What the Constitution Means to Me. This stunningly timely solo theater piece was written and originally performed by Heidi Schreck, a luminous talent who grew up in Wenatchee and started her career in Seattle with the fringe troupe, Printer’s Devil Theater.

Schreck’s candidly personal, brainy and moving work (a 2019 Pulitzer Prize finalist seen on Broadway and filmed for Netflix) raises probing questions about the U.S. Constitution in relation to the rights of women, including the right to abortion, which is now in jeopardy after a recent Supreme Court decision allowing individual states to ban the termination of a pregnancy.

Though it offers a bracing commentary on what the Constitution is in theory and practice, the play, which will be performed at Seattle Rep by a different actor, also reveals how its promises and shortcomings directly affected the lives of Schreck and several female generations in her family.

What the Constitution Means to Me at Seattle Rep, September 30–October 23.

Information: www.seattlerep.org Othello. Shakespeare’s tragedy, which is on the docket for Seattle Shakespeare Company this fall, takes us into the

BOOK AND LYRICS BY

Howard Ashman MUSIC BY

Alan Menken BASED ON THE FILM BY

Roger Corman

SCREENPLAY BY

Charles Griffith have rror will o h l a r u rticult hter…”

“This ho ming with laug a e r c you s ork Post —New Y ISSAQUAH

SEP 14–OCT 23, 2022 EVERETT

OCT 28–NOV 20, 2022

VillageTheatre.org/Shop Box Office (425) 392-2202

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world of a great Moorish warrior whose interracial marriage is threatened by jealousy and bigotry, as he leads a Venetian army in Cyprus.

This gripping play, one of Shakespeare’s finest, has a long and complex history, including centuries of mainly white actors in England and America performing the title role in blackface. That practice has been successfully challenged in recent decades, with Black thespians now taking the lead, and fresh perspectives on the drama informed by our own era.

A new development in Seattle is having a prominent Black theater artist direct the still-controversial play. A classical actor who has excelled in many Seattle Shakespeare Company productions, Reginald André Jackson will stage the work, and it will be fascinating to see how he interprets it.

Othello at the Center House Theatre at Seattle Center, October 25–November 20.

Information: www.seattleshakespeare.org

To Kill a Mockingbird. Coming our way in the fall is a recent Broadway dramatization of Harper Lee’s renown novel, created by noted playwright and screenwriter Aaron Sorkin (The West Wing, Being the Ricardos).

Lee’s compelling tale of a miscarriage of justice in the Deep South is told from the vantage point of the two young children of a widowed attorney, who incurs the ire of his small-town neighbors by defending a Black man falsely accused of raping a young white woman.

Though its themes are mature, the book has had a profound affect on the millions of young people who have read it, and it continues to resonate for adults.

This national touring production stars famed actor Richard Thomas, who many of us will remember as John Boy from TV’s The Waltons. And it features in the supporting cast Mary Badham, who starred as a child in the 1962 film version of “Mockingbird” opposite Gregory Peck.

To Kill a Mock ingbird at the Paramount Theatre, October 11-16.

Information: www.seattle.broadway.com Little Shop of Horrors. Craving a dose of musical comedy? The Village Theatre, which stages productions in Issaquah and Everett, has a lineup that includes this perennial crowd pleaser. Based on an Off-Broadway musical—and a cultfavorite B movie—about a plant with a voracious fondness for human flesh, the show mixes zany humor and romance, with dashes of mock-horror. No big moral messages here. It’s just good, silly fun.

Little Shop of Horrors plays in Issaquah, September. 14-October 23 and Everett, October 28-November 20. For tickets and more information, go to www. villagetheater.org Misha Berson writes about the arts for crosscut. com and many other media outlets, teaches for the UW Osher program, and is the author of four books, including Something’s Coming, Something Good: West Side Story and the American Imagination (Applause/Hal Leonard).

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BOOKS Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole

BY SUSAN CAIN REVIEWED BY ANN HEDREEN Not everyone might be drawn like a magnet to a title like Bittersweet, let alone the subtitle of How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole. But I was. I am a fan of Susan Cain’s first book, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking (2012), and I sensed that Bittersweet might be an intriguing follow-up. This is especially true in 2022, when many of us have experienced more sorrow and longing in the past few years than, perhaps, in any previous era of our life. And so we know firsthand that with sorrow and longing comes meaning and “poignance”—a particularly popular word, Cain writes, among those of us in the second half, or third, or final lap of life.

Poignancy “happens when you feel happy and sad at the same time. It’s the state you enter when you cry tears of joy,” Cain writes. As we get older, we “start to focus on what matters most, stop caring so much about ambition, status, and getting ahead. You want the time you have left to be charged with love and meaning.”

In the introduction to Bittersweet you’ll find a quiz, which includes questions like: “Do you feel elevated by sad music? Do you tend to see the happiness and sadness in things, all at once?” I chafed a little: I wanted to read, not take a quiz. But then of course I took it, and I thought, clearly, I need to read this book. Because this is me. Not just me now, but me all my life. Yes, I love laughter and joy. But I am also, and always have been, drawn to sad music, poetry and art, and yes, I also “tear up easily at touching television commercials.”

Cain dives deeply into what she and many psychologists call the “tyranny of positivity” that pervades American culture.

She also tackles another American trope, “effortless perfection,” which demands that we “appear like a winner without needing to try.” She sits in on workshops with psychologist Susan David, who is dedicated to helping others accept and integrate their difficult emotions. “You might think you’re in control of unwanted emotions when you ignore them, but in fact they control you,” David tells her audiences. “Internal pain always comes out. Always. And who pays the price? We do. Our children, our colleagues, our communities.”

Cain weaves stories from her own life—some heartbreaking, some funny, all of them poignant—throughout the book, which gives Bittersweet an intimacy and feeling of deep honesty. She shares poetry and lyrics that have moved her, from contemporary singer-songwriters to the Sufi poet Rumi. “This longing you express/is the return message,” Rumi wrote, seven centuries ago. “The grief you cry out from/draws you toward union.”

I am grateful to Susan Cain for reminding us of these and other bittersweet truths. And for reminding us that acknowledging the bittersweet currents in our lives can be so unexpectedly uplifting.

GAMES FOR YOUR BRAIN ANSWERS

(Puzzles on page 64)

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3rd Act magazine | fall 2022

Rhymin’ Geography 1. Maine and Spain 2. Nebraska and Alaska 3. Austin and Boston 4. Albuquerque and Turkey

5. Waterloo and Kalamazoo 6. Siberia and Liberia 7. Nome and Rome 8. Nice and Greece

A Bag of Tricks 1. Baghdad 2. Fleabag 3. Windbag 4. Baguette 5. Moneybags 6. Airbag

7. Bagel 8. Lumbago A River Runs Through It 1. The Seine 2. The Nile

3. The Thames 4. The Hudson and East Rivers 5. The Tigris 6. The Danube 7. The St. Lawrence 8. The Tiber

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Aging with Confidence

fall 2022

| 3rd Act magazine

63

GAMES for your brain Exercise your brain and have some fun with these puzzles designed to stimulate different cognitive functions.

Rhymin’ Geography (easy) Each question has clues to two different geographical places that rhyme, such as Bali and Mali or Taos and Laos.

1. U.S. state that is home to Portland and Kennebunk; and the country where you’ll find Madrid and Barcelona. _____________________________ 2. U.S. state that is home to Lincoln and Omaha; and the state that is home to Juneau and Fairbanks. _________________________ 3. The capital of Texas; and the capital of Massachusetts. _____________________________ 4. Largest city in New Mexico; and the country where you’ll find Ankara and Istanbul. _____________________________ 5. Battlefield where Napoleon was defeated; and the Michigan city where Glenn Miller “had a girl.”_____________________________ 6. A huge, frigid, and sparsely populated region of Russia; and the African country settled by American slaves. _____________________________ 7. The capital of Italy; and the Alaskan city that marks the end of the Iditarod sled dog race. _____________________________ 8. A major tourist center and resort on the French Riviera; and the nation that gave birth to democracy and the Olympics. _____________________________

A Bag of Tricks (harder) All the answers in this word definition game contain the consecutive letters BAG. 1. The capital of Iraq. _____________________________ 2. A seedy, run-down hotel or lodging. _____________________________ 3. A person who talks and talks, but says little of value. _____________________________ 4. A long, thin loaf of French bread. _____________________________ 5. Nickname for a wealthy person. _____________________________ 6. This safety device was first introduced in American cars in the mid-1970s. _____________________________ 7. A small, round bread that likely originated in the Jewish area of Krakow, Poland, in the 17th century. __________________________ 8. This is an old fashioned word for lower back pain. _____________________________

A River Runs Through It (hardest) Rivers often play an important role in the life and economy of cities around the world. Given the city, can you name its river?

1. What river runs through Paris? _____________________________ 2. What river runs through Cairo? _____________________________ 3. What river runs through London? _____________________________ 4. What two rivers run on either side of Manhattan in New York City? _____________________________ 5. What river runs through Baghdad? _____________________________ 6. What river runs through Budapest and Vienna? _____________________________ 7. What river runs through Montreal? _____________________________ 8. What river runs through Rome? _____________________________

Reprinted with permission from Nancy Linde, author of the best-selling book 399 Puzzles, Games, and Trivia Challenges Specially Designed to Keep Your Brain Young, 417 More Games, Puzzles, and Trivia Challenges Specially Designed to Keep Your Brain Young; and On-the-Go Games and Puzzles to Keep Your Brain Young. She is also the creator of the website Never2Old4Games.com, which is used by many senior-serving organizations in the U.S. and Canada.

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3rd Act magazine | fall 2022

ANSWERS ON PAGE 62

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