Seven Days, March 24, 1999 by Seven Days

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P A C E

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page 2 . JfY E N DAYS

march 2 4 ,1 9 9 9

f o r

A d u l t

C o n t i n u i n g

E d u c a t i o n

theweeklyreadonVermontnews, viewsandculture CO-PUBLISHERS/EDITORS

Pamela Polston, Paula Routly STAFF WRITER Erik Esckilsen ART DIRECTION Donald Eggert,

Tara Vaughan-Hughes PRODUCTION MANAGER Lucy Howe CIRCU LATIO N/CLASSIFIEDS/ PERSONALS

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Michelle Brown, Eve Jarosinski, Colby Roberts, Diane Sullivan CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

| Marc Awodey, Nancy Stearns Bercaw, Flip Brown, Marialisa Calta, John I; Dillon, Peter Freyne, Paul Gibson, 1 David Healy, Ruth Horowitz, Jeanne Keller, Kevin J. Kelley, Rick Kisonak, Peter Kurth, David Lines, Lola,

Melanie Menagh, Ron Powers, Gail

1 Rosenberg, Elaine Segal, Glenn Severance, Barry Snyder, Heather I Stephenson, Molly Stevens, Karen

“In a grain of corn there is far more than meets the eye.”

Vincent, Margy Levine Young, Jordan Young PHOTOGRAPHER Matthew Thorsen ILLUSTRATORS Paul Antonson, Gary

Causer, Sarah Ryan W W W GUY Dave Donegan

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Features

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question

..................................................................

page 4

Warren Schultz celebrates suburbia in a new book about home turf

weekly m a i l .................................................

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By Paula R outly................................................................. page 8

inside t r a c k ......................................................... .

page 5

news q u i r k s ............................................................

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If I Had a Ham m er... .

crank call

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page 7

A new building book argues everyone is an architect

life in hell

............................................................

page 31

troubletown

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page 3 5

By Deb Abramson............................................................. page 10

B.D. Press in Georgia, VT.

Purple Reign SEVEN DAYS, P.O. Box 1164, 255 S. Champlain St., Burlington, VT 05402-1164

Vermont tries to g e t a handle on a perennial problem

c la s s ifie d s .........................................................

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car t a l k ....................................................................

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By Ruth Horowitz........................................................................ page15 straight dope

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Film Festival

lola, the love counselor

page 41

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the mostly unfabulous social life of A S S O C I A T I O N

. A

. N

ALTERN ATIVE N E W S W E E K IIE S

Being T here: Graduating W ith Horrors

ethan greene

ILLUSTRATIONS BY GARY CAUSER

page 4 2

English stu d en ts bone up for a visit from Stephen King By Erik Esckilsen................................................................ page 30

V E R IFIE D AUDIT CIRCULATION

COVER BY TARA VAUGHAN-HUGHES

...................

T u b e f e d : And the Show Must Go On. And On. And On... By Rick Kisonak..............................................................

page 31

Listings clubs

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calendar art film

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A D U L T R E A D IN G ?

the water supply up there.

Here is m y rant and rave: Please use som e com m on sense and decen cy w hen selling your ads. Especially one in full view o f children. I’m referring to the ad on the back o f the M arch 10 issue, in w hich the words H O LY SH**! were in large bold block letters. Totally inappro

Burlington D E A D C IT Y This letter questions your con tent. Seven Days is available in Plattsburgh; not that I’m com plain ing. It’s just that you never talk about the smell.

ing, and can no longer bring it into our hom e.

emanates from road kill or a decay ing, dead city. Can’t you smell it

Grand Isle S T O O P IN G L O W I am sad to see you lowering yourselves to the advertising on the back page o f the M arch 10 issue.

You know the smell; it’s what

w hen the w ind is wrong? It’s that

to change the pattern o f hatred and abuse, w e m ust learn to change the

“T h e m ,” is captured beautifully by

old m odel o f behavior (you hit me,

calls itself a city may be a manifesta

Mr. Stoll’s adm onition that w e not

I’ll hit you back). W e have seen the

tion o f the failure to deal w ith reali

confuse politics w ith religion. A m en.

abused becom e the abuser many

ty, and a reason for its demise.

O n e o f the greatest disservices and

times, this is the old m odel. T he

Burlington is a city. Boston is a city. M ontreal is a city. N ew York is

distortions perpetuated by the left is

new m odel w ou ld see the abuser and show him /her how to overcome hatred. I f w e really want to change

nor rich. I’ve never m et a peasant in

the pattern o f control by the few, we m ust be prepared to embrace them

that matter, but I’ve noticed that

as our ow n and dissolve hatred w ith love (a radical concept taught by

this fair town, yet another retail chain is saying adieu (Service M erchandise). I guess all is fine if

people in general are neither “g ood ” nor “bad,” but are com plex and

you work for the nepotistic Chamber or are closely related or

flawed. W hat I find objectionable is the persistent polarization o f

tion). But I w onder if this is what the extremists o f any political m ove

thought that dom inates how w e per

m ent really want. I doubt it.

connected.

tional quality o f life created here over the past tw o decades by the

All m ust be well, the Republican-

Press says so — or is it the PressRepublicani? W h o is to disagree with

heinous behavior by a governm ent is m et by heinous behavior o f an opposing force (whether Left or

N orth End, where their resources

land o f Sanders and Clavelle, the

Right matters not). A nd so the cycle

allow them to enjoy the city’s beauty

Flynn and culture, in addition to

o f abuse and dom ination continues

and many.jatjnenities to the fullest.

agriculture.

from one regime to the next.

3. Ir ^ c p lic a b $ y e a ^ fte r year and ;*

after

— Federico G uillerm o

■. cracks and zealots dedicated t o disinantling the quality o f life they m oved here to enjoy in the first place! *i

Cadyville *■ R IG H T A N D LEFT T hank you for the fair and bal anced reporting o f Kevin J. Kelley [“W hat’s Left?” March 17]. T h e real

I’m in favor o f exposing atrocities and punishing those responsible — all atrocities. I am not in favor o f being m anipulated for a higher 'cause. I don’t know what the “peo ple” want, but I’m sure the answers w ould be varied and conflicting.

CaIvinK lein25% O f

H m m m ...m u s t be som ething in

hero o f the story is D avid Stoll for

— Lynda C am pbell R ichm ond

H ow sim plistic is that? So often

T hings just look greener to me on the \fcrm ont side o f the lake. T he

2. Som e o f them m ove to the N e w

every saint regardless o f denom ina

ceive ourselves: To be “Left” is to be good, to be “R ight” is to be bad.

patriarchal right-wing yes-men?

Progressive C oalition.

— Paul Curtiss fice Assistance, VT CARES Burlington

“Right” controversy, or “Us” vs.

even the worst o f us. I f w e are ever

m y life, or a Fortune 500 C E O , for

to B urlington because o f the excep

S S T *

T he heart o f the w hole “Left”-

T h e real challenge is to rem em ber that we are all hum an beings,

city across the lake; that Plattsburgh

1. M any affluent people are attracted

The options are end-

only the glow o f its m ythological beauty.

anyway? W h o really stands to win?

a big city. Plattsburgh is not the city.

politics north o f Institute Road:

— Tina Nabatchi Assistant Coordinator of Champlain Initiative Burlington

ier to raise the pedestal higher so we can’t clearly, see the thing we love,

the everyday m an/w om an choose? M y guess is the m illion bucks. So the question is w hose “fight” is it,

T h e local Chamber o f Com m erce says all is well and on the upswing in

A h, the never-ending puzzle o f

I've got a message fit for a goddess!

has pim ples or farts at night. It’s eas

the “good ” o f the people, sacrificing one’s life — what w ou ld the com m on peasant choose? W hat w ould

M ust you stoop so low to give away

N E W N O R T H E N D P O L IT IC S

— Loretta Roby President, Network Services Corp. Burlington

offer critical views o f an em otionally charged subject. W e don’t really want to hear that our favorite cause

m illion dollars and living a carefree life or joining a fight for ideals for

your newspaper? Perhaps w e get w hat w e pay for. Brandon

Excuse me, you have a call.

unpopular — yet w ell-docum ented — views o f Rigoberta M enchu’s autobiography. It is never easy to

that to be poor is to be pure; to be rich is to be evil. I am neither poor

— V irginia de G Russell

having the courage to publish

— Jan Slusm on

priate. It’s too bad I have to treat Seven Days as off-lim its adult read

— Jayne M ethot-W alker

of ringing, whai would you want

Given the choice between receiving a

Letters Policy: SEVEN DAYS wants your rants and raves, in 250 words or less. Letters are only accepted that respond to content in Seven Days. Include your full name and a daytime phone number and send to: SEVEN DAYS, P.0. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402-1164. fax: 865-1015 e-mail: sevenday@together.net

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page 4

march 24, 1999

Federal Exp ress M a il T h e package cam e sign ed , sealed and delivered,

through the H o u se 3 1 7 -1 0 5 (Sanders against). W h a t th e hell is g o in g on? A sked i f h e felt vin d icated by the vote, “C an d o”

last w eek , from th e W a sh in g to n , D .C ., war room o f

C a n d o n boastfully replied, “It’s th e first o f m an y

the D e m o cr a t Party.

v in d ication s. Im agine what*a tax cut cou ld do?”

“D ear Bernie,

Dogs of a Different Color —

You say you don’t w a n t to risk givin g up yo u r

its day, and these days at th e Statehouse, th e Blue

secure House seat to take a shot a t J im “Rape is a

Every d o g w ill have

Michael Flaherty o f Sou th B urlin gton, Hank “Sem per Fi” Gretkowski and James “Skippy” McNamara o f B urlin gton, Michael “Trooper” Vinton o f C olchester, and Rene “S m ok y” Blanchard o f Essex are enjoying D o g D em ocrats are h avin g theirs. Reps.

Private M a tte r”Jeffords. We understand y o u r concerns. B u t here’s the results o f the p o ll we h a d The M ellm an Group do fo r us last weekend. N o t to worry, i t ’s on our nickel. Bernie, ju s t look a t the numbers. Feel better now ?

“Field M arshall”

Sincerely,

the sp otligh t. T h e fact is, the

The Democratic Senatorial

“G ang o f T h ree” — Speaker

PS. H illary says ‘hi. ’ P.P.S. H ave you thought o f w h a t committees y o u ’d like to serve on

can n o longer call the tu n e the

when you get to the Senate?

w ay D em ocratic leaders have d o n e since

T h e D S C C d ropp ed $ 1 5 ,0 0 0

Ralph Wright

over as speaker in 1 9 8 5 . It’s all

all th e lay o f th e land in V erm on t.

abou t m athem atics. T h e tim es

A fter all, D em ocrats E d F lanagan,

they are a changin’. (By the way, w e’re h avin g a

Jan B ackus, P eter S h u m lin and E lizabeth R ead y have been sn iffin g

codicil pu t in our w ill so that in

around D .C . lately. S o m e even

the event o f yours truly’s pass

su ggested a three-w ay race w o u ld

ing, the Blue D o g s w ill be put

play o u t w ell for th e D em ocrat

d ow n — in a h u m ane fashion,

candidate. N o w the folks at party

o f course — unless Probate

central k n o w that’s n o t the case.

Judge

Susan Fowler rescues

them .)

B ern ie S an d ers beats Jeezum

But let’s n o t ignore the Red

Jim Jeffords 4 5 -4 0 in a h ead -to-

T ra c k

head. A n d w h en Jeffords’ 1 9 9 4 o p p o n e n t Jan Backus is tossed in to

D o g R epublicans. Reps. T om L ittle o f Shelburne, G ord on

BY PETER FREYNE

B ristol o f Brattleboro, M arion M iln e o f W ash in gton , R ich

A ccord in g-to M ellm an ’s analy

W estm a n o f C am b ridge and

sis o f th,e p oll results, “Jeffords’ .vu ln erab ility stem s n o t from his o w n w eakness, but from th e en o rm o u sly h igh regard V erm on t voters

f have for C on gressm an San ders.”

B ob K in se y o f Craftsbury all got prem iu m c o m m it tee assign m en ts because they dance so sprightly to the liberal polka tun es played by O b ie ’s

M ellm an fo u n d that “Sanders’ advantage is evi d en t o n m easures o f key im age traits as w ell.

P h ilh arm on ic Orchestra. A n d last w eek ’s “jok e o f the w eek ” in G O P cir

d o c s bettey th a n J e & r d s o n every p ositive

cles w as this fictitiou s m issive: “D em ocrats

d im e n sio n . For exam p le, 2 8 p ercent say th e phrase

an n o u n ced tod ay that they are ch an gin g their

‘cares ab ou t p eo p le lik e y o u ’ describes Jeffords ‘very

em b lem from a d on k ey to a c o n d o m because it

w e ll,’ bu t 4 7 percent say that ab ou t S a n d e r s ...T h e

m ore clearly reflects their party’s p olitical stance. A

congressm an even leads o n w h a t Jeffords considers

c o n d o m stands up to in flation , halts p rodu ction,

his core issues, like e d u ca tio n . T w enty-th ree percent

discourages coop eration , protects a bu nch o f dicks

say ‘w o u ld w ork to im prove e d u ca tio n ’ describes

and gives o n e a sense o f security w h ile screw ing

Jeffords ‘very w e ll,’ com p ared to 3 7 percent for

oth ers.”

San ders.”

u p s ta ir s

% < ■ *sj.*w s'-’% JjNew M enu Items: Braised Lamb w ith Ch£vre M ashed Potatoes

T h e best is yet to com e. S h o u ld be an illu m in atin g

a m o n g w o m e n voters, w h ere he leads Jeezum C row

debate T hu rsday even in g at 7 :3 0 p.m . in the senate

by a 1 2 -p o in t m argin. M en favor Jeffords by just

cham ber w h en “P o in t-C o u n ter p o in t” focuses on

o n e p o in t. A n d O l’ B ern ard os favorability (7 2 per

w h ich state tax sh o u ld be cut in these heady surplus

cen t) w as higher than b o th Jeffords (6 7 percent)

tim es. “S h ou ld th e Legislature Support the

and G ov. H o w a r d D e a n (6 9 percent)!

G overnor’s C all for an In com e Tax Cut?”

Last w eek , Jeezum Jim returned to the scen e o f his February 2 6 crim e — T h e

Mark Johnson

S h ow

o n W K D R . T h a t’s w h ere h e uttered his in fam ou s

Juanita Bill Clinton sexually

c o m m e n t w h en q u estio n ed ab ou t

Broderick’s charge

that

assaulted her 2 0 years ago. Jeffords portrayed the alleged rape claim as b ein g a “private” m atter b etw een C lin to n and Broderick.

Steve Ciardelli

fa r m

Steamed Atlantic Salmon with ' Al j p ' Baby Bok Choy N H| f x | £ o : C h oke N ew York Strip Steak

Sea Scallops w ith Crispy Potatoes and Garlic Spinach

\ Pan-Roasted Sea Bass w ith Manga Red Onion Relish Brunch

1 8 3 4 S helb u r n e Ro a A d ,lways S outhW B u r l in g:* to n * 8 0 *0 - 4 1 - 1 2 8 1 or 8 6 2 - 1 0 8 1 Reservations elcome L unch D9inner

E ch o in g our D em ocrat governor’s p ositio n w ill be tw o R epublicans: H o u se G O P W h ip

John

Labarge and Rep. Connie “T h e Eagle H as L and ed” Houston. T h e “n o ” sid e w ill be co m p o se d o f tw o D em ocrats: H o u se D em o cra tic W h ip Matt Dunne and W ays and M eans C hairm an Oreste Valsangiacomo Sr. A s always, ad m ission is free o f charge.

H e w as taken to th e w o o d sh e d by a R epu blican to ld Jeezum he th o u g h t th e

senator’s response to th e Broderick q u estio n sh ow ed

What’s Up? —

R ecent favorable m e n tio n o f yours

truly in The Burlington Free Press is certainly o u t o f character for the local G an n ett-ch ain daily. I m ean,

“a c o m p lete lack o f sen sitivity and p olitical savvy. I

isn’t this the sam e paper that m arched into

kqep h earin g y o u say ‘w h en I w as a p rosecutor,’ bu t

C h itte n d en Superior C ou rt five years ago last

I’m sure p eo p le n o w u n derstand w h y w o m e n were

m o n th seek in g a gag order to prevent Inside Track’s

afraid to report rapes 2 0 years ago, w h en p eo p le

coverage o f a law suit brough t b y th e paper’s form er

had attitudes su ch as y o u r s.”

star reporter,

“W ell, I b lew it,” replied Jeffords. “T h e r e ’s no

Paul Teetor?

(Teetor got a six-figure

se ttlem en t and w as last reported to be in th e Los

q u estion ab ou t it. I m ad e so m e statem en ts o n the

A n geles area w ritin g screenplays and teach in g ten

program that I w ish ed I h ad n ’t. T h a t’s n o t th e w a y rI

nis.)

fe el.”

Judge

C row sure has b een a pop ular m e n u item lately.

Matt Katz laugh ed

alou d over the o d d

First A m e n d m en t circu m stan ce o f a new spaper

Not a Box of Rocks —

R em em b er h o w R epu blican

seek in g a gag order to prevent new spaper coverage

con gression al can d id ate

Mark Candon

o f a new s story in volvin g the new spaper in qu es

w as

rid iculed d u rin g th e fall cam p aign for his su p p ort

tio n . In its su m m er 1 9 9 4 issue, th e C olum bia

for a Star W ars m issile shield? Talk ab ou t o u t o f

Journalism Review b estow ed u p o n th e Freeps the national a tten tio n it so richly deserved “for an act o f

touch! G uess what?

professional treason.”

Last w eek , Star W ars passed th e U .S . S enate 9 7 3 (Jeffords for,

The restaurant

V : ' ;/7

Tax Cut Debate —

T h e D S C C p oll fo u n d B ern ie’s stren gth is

caller.

T V

Small mesdun soupdejour, \ any Bistro«ti

to o k

on the poll to learn o n ce and for

the m ix, B ernie still w in s 4 0 -3 5 -8 .

Soupor Salad, Petite ,

Michael Obuchowski, D em ocratic Leader John Tracy and Matt Dunne, the W h ip —

Campaign C om m ittee

Patrick Leahy against)

and w h izzed

N o b o d y ’s said an yth in g ab ou t a truce. L o n g live a free C o stco ...so r ry , K osovo. ®

march 2 4 ,1 9 9 9

SEVEN DAYS

page 5

First-Amendment Follies ^AfiterSam Claiborn, editor of the student newspaper at Saguaro High School in Scottsdale, Arizona, wrote an editorial criticizing footballs cul ture of violence, a member of the schools football team took offense and beat him up. • The Washington Times canceled first lady Hillary Rodham Clintons weekly column, “Talking It Over,” after she refused editor Wesley Pruden’s request to spice it up by defend ing her husband during his impeachment woes and attack ing conservatives. “We dropped it for the same reason that a lot of papers never picked it up,” Pruden told U.S. News & World Report. “It just doesn’t say very much.”

returned to find the house gut ted.

Giant Steps After scientists from Edinburgh and Leeds universi ties surveyed 100,000 trees in the Amazon rain forest, they concluded that the trees are growing faster and bigger as a result of soaking up greenhouse gases in the atmosphere. • Researchers announced last November that after transplanti ng ovarian tissue from African elephants into laboratory mice, several of the mice developed egg-producing follicles — and one contained a mature egg. The scientists, headed by Purdue University researcher John Critser, did not try to impregnate an elephant because they didn’t believe the egg was healthy enough to produce a The Honeymoon Is Over successful pregnancy. “It’s a very Linda Stewart, 39, told important step,” said Randall police in Columbia, Tennessee, that she burned her house down Prather, a professor of animal science at the University of to teach her husband of two Missouri at Columbia, “but it’s months the dangers of smoking clearly going to be a long time in bed. “According to her, he before anyone is going to make had fallen asleep the night an elephant out of this.” before and left a cigarette burn • Nevertheless, Thai embryolo ing, and it burned a small area gists at Mahidol University in on the bed,” Detective Mickey Bangkok said a month later they Jones said. “So she said she was had received permission from going to show him what could King Bhomibol to try to clone a happen if she didn’t catch it.” prped white elephant ridden by Tim Stewart was not home cenwhen the fire started and « ag sfSitVIS’i

of China’s Zhejiang province, : ' sued the Red Flag Publishing Co. for violating his consumer rights after finding 984 typo graphical errors in the 883-page picture book Five Thousand Years o f China. • Lee Williams, 23, sued a tat too parlor in Roseville, Michigan, for misspelling the word “villain.” Williams, who didn’t notice the word “villian” on his right forearm until a friend made fun of him, needed plastic surgery to cover up the mis take and, according to his lawyer, was left with a “scar as long as his fore-

tury, using fragments preserved in alcohol. Shadow of His Former Self Canadians awoke on Groundhog Day to learn that Wiarton Willy, their version of Punxsutawney Phil, had died. The next day, Canadian papers published a photograph of a dead groundhog, identified as Willy, in a small coffin

clutching a carrot. After the public viewing, Wiarton Mayor Al Given admitted that the corpse was not Willy. Ground hog Day organizer Bill Walker explained that when a handler pulled Willy from hibernation for his annual prognostication, the body was badly decom posed, indicating he had been dead for weeks, and was “not presentable for public viewing.” The stand-in corpse was a previ ous Willy, who had been stuffed years before.

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Oops! When the Hampton, Virginia, City Council passed a law banning people from shin ing laser pointers at others, the measure was inadvertently given the same statute number as a law banning public urination, eliminating the existing mea sure. Lawmakers waited a month before passing a new ban on public urination. Animal House Chicago police arrested a man for endangering the life of

;

High Strung An anti-drinking group in Finland reported that teen-age girls there have been getting drunk by inserting tampons dipped in vodka, hoping the alcohol will be absorbed into the bloodstream.,Noting the girls believe the method gets them drunk without their parents being able to smell alcohol on their breath, Tapio Jaakkola, executive director of the Irti Huumeista drug and alcohol center, commented, “I believe tampons are supposed to keep things in and not let them seep out.” Gluttons for Punishment Thousands of Romanians spent Christmas in hospital emergency rooms after stuffing themselves with pork, pickled cabbage and prune alcohol as part of their national tradition of overindulgence. The Buch arest newspaper Libertatea reported that some 3500 people called ambulances over the < Christmas weekend and thou sands more were treated else where for ulcers and gastritis caused by overeating.

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Subject Matters n last week’s letters col umn, my old friend and high-school classmate Sam Press wondered what he had to do to be men tioned in “Crank Call,” hoping that it wouldn’t be something worse than what he’s already been through. I rush to assure you, Sam — and not forgetting my heartiest congratulations on your vigorous recovery — nothing so dire as a stroke is required. It’s easy to get mentioned in “Crank Call.” Here are a few convenient tips: Be a Republican. I never get tired of bashing the Republican party. I regard it as a service to humanity. Now that the impeachment farce is over, Republicans have been making a great display of asking themselves just what it is they stand for. W ith this question in mind, a whole slew of GOP Congressmen went off to Hershey, Pennsylvania, last qyjfluyLaajuQ,-,.. ing. There were group semi nars, “one-on-ones,” re morseful confessions, “kind ness” tips, and so forth. According to the papers, hugs were exchanged. In deed, one Republican declared for the record that he would miss his hugs when he got back to Washington. Don’t you fall for it. The Republican party stands for money, money and money, in that order. It’s the party of the robber class. Even the G O P’s most demonic con stituency, the so-called Religious Right, has been wiped off the map, electorally speaking, by the party’s dripping lust for the dollar. Lately, the Right has conceded that it probably can’t realize its hideous agenda through political channels. I wish it would go back to its Bible lessons and recall what the ancients said about God and Mammon, rich men, camels, needles, etc. For that matter, I wish everybody would. Give Gwyneth Paltrow an Oscar. Is it just me, or are there too many pale-blonde, watery-eyed, lip-trembling, translucent-skinned female “actors” in Hollywood these days? I’ve tried, but I can’t teU the difference between

x and i

any of the other splay legged anemics who’ve recently graced the cover of Vanity Fair. Paltrow stands out only because she’s con sidered to be the cream of all this relentlessly skimmed milk. “Goony, gangly Streep Jr. on sugar pills,” says Camille Paglia. O f course, Hollywood is a community

my contempt for these reck less, aggressive, resourcewasting, road-hogging disasters-in-waiting. I understand that everything looks differ ent when you actually drive one. That’s the reason SUVs are so uniquely dangerous. They reflect the rampant trend in this country to con sider life only from the inside — my vehi cle, my living Is it ju s t m e, or a re room, my view of the mountains — th e re too m any and they do it in p a le -b lo n d e , w a te ry great big crashing lumps of steel. e y e d , lip -tre m b lin g , The latest of tra n s lu c e n t-s k in n e d these ghastly con traptions, the Ford fe m a le “a c to rs ” in Excursion, touted H o llyw o o d th ese as “the tallest and days? heaviest yet made,” gets about 10 that’s moved heaven and miles to the gallon in city earth to sell Minnie Driver driving and is expected to as a raving beauty, so any sell in the neighborhood of thing can happen. $50,000. Before the Excur Make a list o f the “Top sion could be approved for 100”anything. The latest is sale, Ford was required to stocks* as in,„“Jh<L. Top 100 News Stories of the front and rear bumpers in Century.” The dropping of order to prevent it from dri-* the atomic bomb on ving right over a smaller Hiroshima and Nagasaki at vehicle in a collision, which, the end of the World War II tests showed, it would do comes in first on the list just even at the stately pace of released by the “Newseum” 30 miles an hour. As it is, in Washington, followed by 60 to 90 percent of the Neil Armstrong’s walk on “extra deaths and injuries” the moon in 1969 and the in accidents involving SUVs Japanese attack on Pearl are caused by the smaller Harbor. vehicle being totally crushed W hy the bombing of by the larger one. Experts Pearl Harbor — which, after are divided as to whether it’s all, was conducted from the the height or the weight of air — is deemed a bigger SUVs that makes the mur news story than the inven derous difference. I say it’s tion of the airplane in 1903 both, and I’d like to see laws I do not know. W hy either enacted to restrict the rights is considered more impor of their owners. tant than the political In fact, I’d like to see a enfranchisement of women ghetto created specifically in 1920 I also do not know. for SUVs, bounded some I do know something about where within the borders of the Newseum, which wrote Shelburne, Hinesburg and me before it opened asking Charlotte. Anyone driving if I had any memorabilia of an SUV outside the ghetto Dorothy Thompson, the would receive a warning on pioneering American jour first offense. For each addi nalist whose biography I tional violation, a finger had written. I said I had her would be cut off and sent to desk, among other things. Detroit. I would make an Too big, they said. Well, I exception to this rule only said, I have photographs, for a few of my misguided letters, autographs, first edi friends, in case they were tions, etc. No, they said, wondering. Fly around the world in a that wasn’t what they had in hot-air balloon. Now that mind. I said, why did you someone’s finally done it, call? They said they didn’t may I assume that there w ill. know —- it wasn’t in the be no more stories about computer. Drive %Sport Utility ; billionaires’ balloons for the foreseeable future? Feh! 0 . . I1&0W to no one in ft lf f t T. V; 4 ' -Vi M i a s ? ! i i - A't-e f 1-'

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he smell of cut grass and gasoline may not have done it for Marcel Proust. But for millions of American men, it is the scent of summer. Nothing says baseball and bar becue quite like a chorus of lawnmowers cutting up the neighborhood on Saturday morning. After six months of a Vermont winter, in particular, the high-pitched whine of a mower making its rounds — or straight lines, depending on how you trim your turf — is music to the ears. It is to Warren Schultzs, anyway — he’s the Essex Junction author of a glamorous new book that grants grass the respect it deserves. In A Mans Turf: The Perfect Lawn, Schultz makes no apologies for loving lawns, which in recent years have gotten a bad rap as chemi cal-covered symbols of subur bia. As he puts it, “Today fuss ing over lawns seems as shame ful as smoking a cigarette or eating a double cheeseburger.” In A Mans Turf he comes to the fescue, er, rescue of what he calls the “great green moats of America.. .Everything we need to know about life we can learn while mowing the lawn,” he states in one of many philo sophical musings. After mean dering through 180 pages of sod farms, golf greens, mower races and close-up turf shots, you almost believe him. It’s enough to make a girl run for the push mower. But the lawn is no woman’s land in this unabashed “guy book.” Schultz, a former editor in chief at National Gardening magazine in Burlington, goes way beyond sports and mower mechanics to explore the pri mordial connection between a man and his turf. He calls it a “socially acceptable meditation mat” that connects us, however

Warren Schultz celebrates suburbia in a new book about home turf

MOWER POWER TO H IM : W a rre n S c h u ltz fa c e s th e b la d e

tenuously, with our ancestors out on the savannas or prairies or plains.” The book stops short of equating the first mow with a ritual circumcision, but clear ly asserts that blazing the “path to manhood” is a coming of age. It was a boyhood photo graph that inspired the book — on page 13, Schultz and his brother are pictured flanking their shirtless father, each with a baby hand on the mighty lawnmower. Schultz was working in New York at Garden Design magazine when a photo editor saw the shot and insisted he write a personal essay to accom pany it. The published piece caught the attention of an edi tor at Random House and, over lunch, Schultz accepted his strangest writing assignment ever: a coffeetable lawn book. He had already done a straight lawn-care book for Rodale Press — The Chemical Free Lawn — so it was easy to get the wheels turning again. “A lot of it is over-the-top,” Schultz concedes, “but there is a grain of truth to it. Whether men realize it or not, the lawn does fulfill some of these needs.” Ironically, the publish ers expect women to be. the biggest buyers of the book, which will be out next month. They must have had Father’s Day in mind when they attached a retail price to its glowing green hardcover: $33. Borrowing somewhat Jirom the original essay that inspired it, A Mans Turfk'icks off on a personal note: mowing memo ries. Pacing the lawn in an “ever-tightening spiral,” Schultz muses on his relationship with his father, the symbolic “handoff of the mower” and his own lawn expansion efforts, taming the wild grass that surrounded the New York truck farm on which he grew up — and returned to years later, to gar den.

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Using his own microcosmic experience as a point of depar ture, Schultz launches into an abbreviated history of the lawn, from its sheep-shearing origins in Western Europe to its garish domination of the American suburbs. Organized by chapters, the book covers the basics of lawn history, turf breeding, mowing, watering, weeding and landscaping. In fact, there is plenty for the lawnsman to

and how it took hold in an America that was ready to embrace conformity. Especially at the end of winter, it’s hard to behold an expanse of weed-free Kentucky bluegrass without getting very itchy feet. Equally appealing are the retro adver tisements sprinkled throughout the book that show scantily clad women, or their teenage sons, tending the turf. There’s no doubt the old ads

“We follow almost identi cal paths across virtually interchangeable lawns in a virtual million-man mow.” — Warren Schultz learn here, from “sprinkler speak” to how to build a back yard putting green — a laborintensive, 19-step process that Schultz winds up with a sarcas tic recommendation: “Putt as time allows.” The way in which A Mans Turf is put together is more entertaining than encylopedic. It’s a lively mix of history, how to and lawnchair psychology relayed in story form with plen ty of sidebars, time lines and interesting lawncare trivia. You’ll learn that 25 square feet of turf produce daily oxygen requirements for one person. And that at 70 miles an hour, the fastest mower in the world — equipped with a helicopter engine — can trim a football field in 14 minutes. Even the captions are fact-filled. Schultz handled the photog raphy research himself, and he clearly knows a thing or two about art direction. Two hun dred color photographs tell the story of the chlorophyll carpet,

were targeting a male market. “Pick any moment on a sum mer Saturday morning, and millions of men are walking vir tually the same line, lulled by the same roar, seduced by the same scent,” Schultz writes. “We follow almost identical paths across virtually inter changeable lawns in a virtual million-man mow.” That poetic dose of philosophy appears on the same page as Schultz’a rec ommended trimming heights for 13 different types of turf, from warm-season Bermudagrass to cool-season “fine fescue.” Walt W hitman was right on the money when he suggested a blade of grass was “no less than the journeywork of the stars.” There’s a lot to learn about the green stuff, like the fact that new varieties are found, not manufactured. Guys actually go out looking for good turf, like mushrooms, then breed it at research facilities. A single grass plant can produce more than 300 miles of roots. “There are

huge variations in how grasses withstand traffic, shade, drought and other conditions,” Schultz suggests. “Knowing your grasses will not only make a better-looking, healthier lawn, it can also mean spending les’s time and money to maintain it.” The latter half of A Man’s Turf'xs dedicated to that Sisyphusian endeavor — grow ing, and maintaining, the per fect lawn. Defining that grassy ideal is where the perennial pursuit gets political. We meet men who go to great lengths to make the grass a little greener on their side of the fence. Chemically speaking, golf clubs and baseball stadiums are the worst offenders. “Grass is like a woman,” the head greenskeeper at Shea Stadium told Schultz. “You’ve got to treat her right.” Does that mean subjecting her to regular doses of herbicide and fungicide? Although he never gets preachy about it, Schultz thinks not. “Unless it’s freshly sown or newly sodded, the lawn can do a remarkable job of taking care of itself,” he suggests. He also quotes a pro fessional turf breeder in Oregon: “A good lawn,” the grass guru recommends, “is one that looks good from across the street.” Recognizing that the lawn lends itself to obsessiveness and competition, Schultz’s underly ing message is, ‘Don’t overdo it.” It’s a man’s relationship to his turf that counts. And yes, some of these lawn love affairs are dysfunctional. “We fight to subvert its true nature and make it something that it isn’t,” Schultz says of the lawn. “We clip it within an inch of its life. We pour on fertilizer. We douse it with pesticides. We drench it with water to keep it from going dormant. But no matter what its condition, the lawn allows us to fulfill the primal need to be in touch with the

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B y D eb A b r a m s o n

Architect John Connell is on a very strange mission: He’s try ing to put himself out of busi ness. “People are meant to design their own houses,” he says, and for nearly 20 years, he’s been giving them the skills to do so. Connell is the founder of the Yestermorrow school in Warren, which since 1980 has taught its students to design and build their own homes through a jam-packed twoweek curriculum every summer. In addition, the school offers specialty courses in related sub jects like woodworking, stone masonry and landscape design, as well as professional coursework for architecture students. Connell’s latest project was not teaching about building, but writing about it. He calls the recently published Homing Instinct “a Yestermorrow primer.” The book is organized according to Connell’s concep tion of the design process, which is a consideration of three overlapping ar£b#of inquiry: the Site, the Program — how you want to live — and the Building. The result is less prescriptive than most how to books, though there’s plenty of nuts-and-bolts information. Owner-builder is not a new concept, but it’s one that has not enjoyed much popularity since the Industrial Revolution. W ith the increasing specializa tion of the work force, Americans handed over the design and manufacture of their homes to architects, developers and other designated “experts.” According to Connell, they handed over much more: Today’s homes no longer express who their occupants are and how they want to live,

leaving them alienated and dis satisfied. Connell’s goal is to revive the owner-builder tradition, to “empower individuals to house themselves,” as he puts it. This process involves, in part, debunking the myth of the hero-architect. People need to be reminded “that the architect is no more godlike than their doctor or anybody else,” Connell says. They must be persuaded that, given the prop er training, anyone can design a home. “While our students need what the architect knows,” he writes in Homing Instinct, “they may not neces sarily need the professional architect.” In reality, only a small per centage of Yestermorrow stu dents go on to design and build houses entirely on their own. Most often, graduates will become more involved, active consumers who collaborate with the professionals they hire. But fostering even this level of involvement can be considered radical in a profession with a strong tradition of high-minded elitists who think they know better than you do how you should live. Call Connell a renegade architect, though, and he’ll demur. He’s just “a well-adjust ed guy from New Jersey,” lucky to stumble onto “something important” as he made his way in the world. Connell graduat ed from college with a degree in fine arts and began an appren ticeship with a printmaker. Three years later, he was still a starving artist surviving on odd jobs at construction sites. There, he noticed, the builders and tradespeople were making a pretty decent living. It dawned on him that “if you attach utili ty to what you make, people

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will pay for it. And if people gave me tens of thousands of dollars worth of copper and concrete,” he says excitedly, “then I could make some really fun things. “O f course,” he adds, “I would also make sure they had a kitchen and a bedroom. But basically I saw architecture as a road to making art where I could also make a living.” Connell is 48, but as he talks, it’s easy to see the subur ban kid he once was, concoct ing frothy potions in his base ment chemistry lab and build ing elaborate tree forts in the back yard. This is some one, after all, who describes residential plumbing as “gorgeous, sculptural stuff with an almost Mondrian type of aesthetic to it.” Connell says it was selfish pragmatism that led him to found Yestermorrow after gradu- i

“Human beings are a pathetic animal,” he says. “We don’t have wings, we don’t have claws or pelts. W hat we have is the opposable thumb and the ability to make things. It sud denly felt like what I was doing was teaching fish to swim.” Connell became so con vinced of this “homing instinct” that now, when poten tial clients come to his private practice, he first tries to per suade them to go to Yestermorrow. If they insist on hiring him, he’ll make the process as collaborative as possi ble. And rather than ask them

Connell says. “But we tell them, ‘The design begins with you. The Yestermorrow curricu lum intentionally cuts right to the core, and as a result the classroom dynamic sometimes resembles group therapy. The process can be especially chal lenging for couples — the fac ulty often double as marriage counselors. “Couples have to talk to each other in ways they never did before,” says Connell. Their long-secret dissatisfac tions and longings come out in the design process, he explains, and they are suddenly forced to deal with them. Before presenting the “endless ques tions” in Homing Instinct, Connell adopts a cautionary tone: “This kind of intimate stuff makes many folks nervous. Good residential design begs heavy questions.” But Connell has observed that when people finally arrive at a clearer sense of their goals, and the steps they can take to reach them, they are changed forever. “It’s a dramatic transforma tion,” he attests, and one that still fills him with awe. The process is so powerful, in fact, that the State of Vermont con tracted with Yestermorrow to teach a couple'of building class es to battered women one sum mer several years ago. One of the graduates now has her own contracting firm. The Yestermorrow program, however, isn’t exactly touchyfeely. It’s a rigorous, intensive two weeks that leaves graduates exhausted. Students split their days between the studio, where they develop their designs, and a construction site somewhere in town, where they learn

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f their inhabitants. what kind of “look” they want, he asks them instead what he calls the “endless questions”: Who are you? How do you want to live your life? W hat do you value? These are the same ques tions that Yestermorrow stu dents are forced to grapple with, before they ever pick up a hammer or learn the difference between plan and elevation. This kind of soul-searching is an unexpected departure point for many students, but for Connell, it’s the only one. He believes the most successful homes express the vision, choic es, values and personality of their inhabitants. “Some students — particu larly the men — just want to get to the building part of it,”

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Connell believes the ost successf omes express the ision, choices, val-

of Architecture. “Young architects,” he explains, h “simply don’t have a lot of I credibility. If people are going to hand over huge sums of money, they want to give it to someone with experi ence.” Connell knew that if he went the usual route, he would be stuck at a big New York firm “detailing baseboards of bath rooms in high rises” for years. Instead, Connell moved to Vermont and started Yester morrow with a $10,000 inheri tance from his grandfather and jthe help of a couple of local architects who were “just brave enough” to join him. But when he saw how quickly the stu dents picked up the principles [he and his colleagues were teaching, Connell realized that something significant was tak ing place in the Yestermorrow [classroom: He was helping peo ple reconnect with a longjuried instinct.

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precise but friendly — one drawing identifies rafters, knee C o n tin u e d from p a g e 11 braces, posts and other impor tant framing elements; it also building techniques. Nights are identifies two men sitting on devoted to lectures and discus the tie beam as “goof-offs.” sions. While the copy gives you hard The curriculum emphasizes facts and technical details, it “green” building techniques, but the faculty doesn’t push this also cheers you on. Homing Instinct cannot agenda too hard. The book replicate the Yestermorrow makes a more emphatic argu experience, and Connell con ment, but Connell is careful to cedes it’s not the last word on present choices, not prescriphome design. But he hopes the tives. He has faith that if stu xombination of information dents' and readers learn to care and inspiration will provide about their built environment, potential builders with the they will also want to build direction they need. The gener responsibly. ous bibliography and extensive ‘ W hat can someone with no appendices — “Earthquake design or construction back Basics,” “Building Codes and ground expect to come away Your Friend the Inspector” — with after graduating from point advanced readers to more Yestermorrow? “W hat the stu sophisticated facts and dents have done by the end,” Connell says proudly, “is design resources. Connell stepped back from their first and ugliest house.” Yestermorrow last year — Peter He’s proud because “the fact is, they understand how the shapes Walcott is the current executive director — and is taking a came to be and how they will much-needed sabbatical. affect each other.” In other * “People who found organiza words, they have a beginning, and they have the know-how to tions are often uniquely ill-suit ed to run them,” he says. “I revise, amend and elaborate. never wanted it to be ‘John’s For those who can’t fit school,’ and I’m probably leav Yestermorrow into their sched ing seven years too late.” ules or budgets, Homing But Connell, who lives in Instinct, based on the school’s Warren, is not without projects. curriculum, is second best. The text is humble and earnest, pep First, he says, he’s finishing up pered with just the right dose of “little messes” he made: work ing on a few buildings that will humor. The illustrations are

Hammer

be completed this spring. He’s also making a television pilot that “continues this effort to have home owners reconnected to their homes;” he’s consider ing two book proposals — “one is about how to save the world by designing and building your own home, and the other is sort of a handbook for raising chil dren” — and he’s considering going to animation school. “And I’m enjoying re-meet ing family and friends and fin ishing my own house,” he says. All of Connell’s projects, it seems, bring him back to his “mission” about houses and humanity. He recalls one “gearhead” student who was an auto fanatic. The student designed a house with an engine right in the middle of the living room. A glass wall separated the living room from the garage. The man had an effective “grease barrier,” but visually he was in his shop the second he came home. That, to Connell, is home design at its best. “When I look at houses,” he says, “I see people.” (Z) John Connell will sign copies o/Homing Instinct, in a presen tation with Yestermorrow execu tive director Peter Wolcott, at Barnes & Noble in South Burlington Sunday, March 28, 1-2:30 p.m.

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Vermont tries to get a handle a perennial problem

B y R uth H orowitz few summers back, some landowners in Dorset applied for a permit to replace a dam. Vermont Wet lands Coordinator Carl Pagal checked out the site and signed off on the permit. But he includ ed a condition: Before construc tion could begin, the landowners had to destroy half a dozen spiked, magenta flowers that Were growing beside the pond. One year later, when the permit was finally granted, however, the landowner claimed he couldn’t comply with this requirement. Returning to Dorset to investigate, Pagal was stunned by what he saw. In just one growing season, the small patch of purple flowers had proliferated to six or seven thou sand plants. “We went out in canoes and we couldn’t pull them all,” the wetlands watcher relates. “They had a Scout troop go out in six or seven canoes, and they couldn’t pull them. I guess what I’m trying to say is, it spreads very rapidly.”

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This prodigiously proliferat ing plant is Lythrum salicaria, aka purple loosestrife — a beguilingly beautiful, impres sively invincible perennial that’s rapidly tinting Vermont’s land scape violet. In the process, it’s making gardeners, envi ronmentalists and gov ernment officials see red. An army of beetle-wrangling botanists, bill-wielding legisla tors and plant-pulling volun teers is waging a multi-pronged effort to turn back the purple tide. State naturalists classify pur ple loosestrife as a Category One “Invasive Exotic,” meaning it’s the sort of plant no one would worry about as long as it didn’t move in next door. The problem is, this violet visitor doesn’t know its place. A European native, the species made its first incursions onto North American soil in the seed bags of 19th-century immigrants, and in the ballast water of their ships. A single loosestrife specimen can produce sev eral million seeds. “They blow on the wind, they’re carried on duck feathers, on our feet, and on water, where they look like pepper,” Pagal mar vels. And once the aggressive alien has established roots, other species just can’t compete. Like little independent retailers that can’t keep up with big-box stores, native wetland plants like cattails and sedges

are quickly crowded out by pur ple loosestrife. Habitats that once supported diverse ecosys tems become solid, purple monocultures. Worst of all, nat uralists wail, unlike the species it displaces, purple loosestrife provides poor food value and deficient nesting sites for birds and mammals, ruins the spawn ing grounds of northern pike, and clogs drainage ditches. Since 1995, the state has been fighting the fuchsia flower with posses of European, loosestrife-loving beetles so small that four of them will fit across the nail of your little finger. At first, scientists worried about inviting yet another foreign ele ment into the neighborhood.

lect purple loosestrife plants in the field and propagate them in kiddie pools*, Net ' bags neatly tied over the flowers’ tops keep the seeds from escaping. “Having these beetles will eliminate 90 per cent of the purple loose strife,” Pagal predicts. “We’ve had them out for four years, and we’re starting to see some results.” While scientists pursue purple loosestrife in the wild, legislators are taking aim at nurseries, where the plant is still being sold as an orna mental. H.208, currently under consideration in the House Agriculture Committee, would make selling, planting or otherwise distributing purple loosestrife a finable offense. So far, the initiative has met with little resistance under the gold en dome, says Invasive Exotic Plants Committee chair Holly Crosson, who testified before Agriculture. “I was quite impressed by how committed they seemed to be to making sure it was properly addressed,” she remarks. The picture looks a little dif ferent outside Montpelier, where gardening retailers claim that the bill isn’t needed because the industry has already climbed aboard the anti-loose

An arm y of b e e tle -w ran glin

genus a bad name. A lot of peo ple in Vermont are concerned^ about it, and we life 5' ourselves a Vermont company.” Though you can’t buy pur ple loosestrife at Addison Gardens in Panton, owner Paul Sokal calls the flower “a great garden plant. It has nice stature in the garden and it’s longblooming.” Sokal stopped car rying the variety several years ago, before it was fashionable to be anti-loosestrife, because he was concerned about its aggres siveness. Given the current wave of loostri-phobia, he believes it’s simply “a good busi ness decision to drop purple loosestrife.” But Sokal, who sits on Crosson’s Invasive Exotic Plants Committee, is no longer convinced that barring purple loosestrife from private gardens will have any appreciable impact on the violeting of Vermont. The current battle with pur ple loosestrife is part of a larger concern, nation-wide, about what happens when non-native plants are introduced to local habitats. Hard-line botanical nativists fret that our landscape is becoming increasingly homogenous. But Rose Paul, director of stewardship for the Nature Conservancy, points out that dandelions, chickory, all the grass we grow on our lawns, and even red clover, the Vermont state , flower, are all imports. Paul considers alien species bad news only when they act like bullies. Is the current cam paign to prevent the Green Mountain State from becoming the color of Tinky Winky sensible environmental policy, or a thinly veiled exercise in botanical bigotry? David Zuckerman, a representative from Burlington and a co-spon sor of H. 208, says that although he objects to the way purple loosestrife treats other plants, he doesn’t have anything against the flower itself. After all, he protests, “Purple is my favorite color.” ®

botanists, b ill-w ie ld in g le g isla to rs nd p la n t-p u llin g vo lu n te e rs is

Lw aging a multi-n [turn b a c k the

The plan was only adopted after quarantine trials proved that the finicky little critters would sooner starve than eat anything other than purple loosestrife leaves. Pagal and his colleagues raise their attack insects each summer on a customized beetle ranch in Waterbury. They col-

TTTXiTtfX strife bandwagon. Todd Fisher, retail division manager at Four Seasons Garden Center in Williston, says that although his store carried “non-invasive” varieties of the flower last year, this year they will not. “It was really a supply-and-demand sce nario,” Fisher explains. “Purple loosestrife has given the whole

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om Steams wants to know where your seeds have been. That is, where were they grown? Were they tested for Vermont’s short growing season? Are they organic, or were they heavily sprayed along the way? It’s spring — that means darning time — and the pro prietor of High Mowing Organic Seed Farm in Wolcott is out to change the way Vermonters buy, and even think about, their seeds. Unlike all other seed companies — who buy seeds in bulk from growers around the world and sell them in much smaller quantities — Stearns grows everything he sells. And while the vast majority of commer cial seeds are not organically grown, High Mowing is the only certified organic seed company in New England. Like the seeds themselves, the name High Mowing has a history. “At the turn o f the last;,, rcentury, most hayfields were;!"r called ‘mowings,’ not hayfields, and most old-timers still refer to them as mowings,” Stearns explains. “A ‘high mowing’ just refers to a hayfield that’s up on a high hilltop. It’s very much a Vermont and New Hampshire term ...I wanted something that would speak to this being a company that’s based in New England and that serves the New England gardener.” Stearns is a tall, lanky guy in his late twenties with a verti cal shock of brown hair and the eager eyes of a dedicated man. His air of quiet self-assur ance belies the passion he clear ly has for his work. He got his degree in sustainable agricul ture from Prescott College in Arizona, where he studied permaculture, biodynamics, seed growing and agricultural histo ry. His bookshelf is crammed with volumes on farming and gardening from the last 50 years. During his studies Stearns became influenced by the work of Rudolph Steiner, founder of the “biodynamic” farming system. Steiner’s work imbues farming with a sense of spirituality, summed up in a quote from the German philosopher in High Mowing’s catalog: “...Everything should become a parable of the spiri tual. In a grain of corn there is far more than meets the eye. There is a whole new plant invisible within it.” As he approaches his Fifth growing season, Stearns has

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A SPECIAL "FAM ILY M ATINEE" P ER FO R M A N C E !

At High Mowing, Tom Stearns bucks the botanical trend

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Sunday, March 28 at 2 pm Innovators in children’s theater for more than 40 years, the Paper Bag Players continue to delight young audiences nationwide. Sporting their characteristic brown-paper costumes, colorful props, rousing songs, delightful dances, clever mime, and audience participation, the Players reprise an old favorite. The joyous musical review Hot Feet offers a whimsical look at the humor, dreams, and concerns of every child. A fun-filled event for all ages! W * s,” S0' " ’ BeldBn

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finally secured a permanent farm of his own, after moving his operation several times. Last April, he purchased his current 37-acre spread, and is busy clearing new planting fields, which need to be somewhat isolated from each other to pre vent cross-pollination. This year, Stearns expects to sell and promotionally distrib ute close to 10,000 packets of seeds, representing about 55 different varieties. If this sounds like a lot, consider that many companies will sell 10 or 20 thousand packets of a single variety. Having your own seed busi ness doesn’t require a huge warehouse — the world head quarters of High Mowing is temporarily housed in a woodheated mobile home. “One quart jar of tomato seeds has over 2000 packets worth of seeds in it,” Stearns notes. His tiny spare bedroom serves as office, marketing department, seed-storage area, order center, packet preparation zone, whole sale division, and shipping department. Growing your own seeds, though, is not as simple as it sounds. “Each year I end up growing two or three hundred varieties to trial them,” Stearns says. “Then if they’re good enough, I trial them again, and then, finally grow them to pro duce the seed for the catalog.” Only in this labor-intensive way can he ascertain that the seeds will do well in Vermont’s growing season. Stearns’ market is home gar deners, not commercial farmers. He doesn’t even try to compete with the major seed companies. And he’s a preservationist, which “might mean you see varieties that you wouldn’t see

somewhere else.” Listed in his catalog are varieties whose names beg for their stories to be told: “Clear Dawn Onion,” “Peacevine Cherry Tomato,” “Early Riser Pole Bean.” High Mowing grows and sells exclusively “open-pollinat ed” seeds, which will remain true to their variety if the seed is properly harvested, stored and replanted. By contrast, the majority of seeds sold today are “hybrids.” To produce a hybrid seed, two varieties, or cultivars, are selected for certain qualities and then crossed. However, if the seed from the hybrid is saved, it will not run “true,” and you could end up with a plant resembling either parent, or a mutant. Before the early part of this century, seeds were passed from generation to generation. When hybrids became commercially available, many old varieties were lost — or so it seemed.

Although its namesake, Roy Fair, died in 1981, Stearns learned that his particular strain of corn had been grown in the same cold Vermont valley since around 1870, handed down from grandfather to father to son. The unique grain — used for making cornmeal or “Johnny Cakes” — is particu larly suited to producing early, vigorous crops in Vermont’s less-than-ideal conditions. Roy’s Calais Flint corn has become so popular that Fedco Seeds, in Waterville, Maine, cooperated with High Mowing to offer it to their customers — it sold out in two weeks. It was also the subject of a 1998 Vermont Life article. Stearns teaches well-attend ed workshops on seed saving at his farm — classes that could put him out of business if his students learn their lessons. On the other hand, the more inter est there is in open-pollinated

Listed in his catalog are varieties whose names beg for their stories to be told: “Clear Dawn Onion,”

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Gypsy Caravan W ednesday, A pril 7 at 7:30 pm The sound of mournful fiddles, joyous accordions, festive guitars, and exuberant vocals— as well as the visual feast of flamenco dance— fills the stage with passion and pageantry as this unprecedented gathering of more than 30 world-class Gypsy musicians and dancers travels to Burlington. Featuring six acclaimed ensembles (including the sensational Taraf de Hai'douks) from Romania, Bulgaria, India, Spain, Hungary, and Russia. Curated by the World Music Institute.

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“Peacevine Cherry Tomato,” “Early Riser Pole Bean.”

Coming Soon— 4/9-La Gran Scena and heirloom seeds, the greater the interest in his business. Either way, Stearns sees the dis semination of seed-saving tech niques as part of his mission. “I believe that seed saving and growing our own food is an incredible way to reestablish a relationship with the natural world,” he says. At High Mowing Farm, that relationshipis growing, one seed at a time. (?)

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Part of the fun for Stearns is tracking them down. “A lot of my seeds are old heirloom vari eties that no other seed compa ny has,” he says. “I kind of fell into this niche because of my own interest in old varieties connected with neat histories and neat families, and preserv ing some rare varieties.” High’Mowing’s most notable seed introduction has been Roy’s Calais Flint corn.

Opera Company

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SEVEN DAYS

page 17

where to go

GEORGIA PEACH That Brooks Williams has it going on: a soulful singersongwriter who can flatpick and slide his guitar all over tarnation. One of the first two songs he learned to play, at age 10, was The Beatles’ “Blackbird.” So you might say his latest CD, Hundred Year Shadow, returns to his roots: The Fab Four’s “I Will” joins a full plate of hauntingly mellow originals. Williams returns to the Burlington Coffeehouse this Friday.

‘MISERY’ HAS COMPANY Elliott Smith might not have reached his current level of indie-votion were it not for the explosive success of Good W ill Hunting and its soundtrack

Smith contributed “Miss Misery,” which garnered an Academy Award nomination for Best Original Song last year. Now the fine narcotic sprawl of his acoustic urban-folk is riding an airwave near you. Mr. Smith goes to Winooski, at Higher Ground, this Tuesday.

Alley-Cats, 41 King St., Burl., 660-4304. Backstage Pub, 60' Pearl St., Essex Jet., 878-5494. Billy Bob’s, Keith Ave., Barre, 479-5664. Blue Tooth, Access Rtl., Warren, 583-2656. Boony’s, Rt. 236, Franklin, 933-4569. Borders Books & Music, 29 Church St., Burlington, 865-2711. Brewski, Rt. 108, Jeffersonville, 644-5432. Cactus Cafe, 1 Lawson Ln., Burl., 862-6900. Cafe Banditos, Mountain Rd., Jeffersonville, 644-8884. Cafe Ole, North Common, Chelsea, 685-2173. The Cage, Bolton Rd., Waterbury, 244-5457. Cambridge Coffee House, Smugglers’ Notch Inn. Jeffersonville, 644-2233. Champion’s, 32 Main St., Winooski, 655-4705. Charlie O's, 70 Main St., Montpelier. 223-6820. Chicken Bone, 43 King St., Burlington, 864-9674. Chow! Bella, 28 N. Main St., St. Albans, 524-1405. Club Extreme, 165 Church St., Burlington, xxxxx. Club Metronome. 188 Main St., Burlington, 865-4563. Cobbweb, Sandybirch Rtl., Georgia. 527-7000. Danny’s Pub, Keith Ave., Barre. 479-5664. Diamond Jim's Grille, Highgate Comm. Shpg. Ctr., St. Albans. 524-9280. Edgewater Pub, 340 Malletts Bay Ave., Colchester, 865-4214. Emerald City Nightclub, 114 River St., Montpelier, 223-7007. Franny O’s 733 Queen City Pk. Rd., Burlington, 863-2909. Gallagher’s, Rt. 100 & 17, Waitsfield, 496-8800. Giorgio’s Cafe. Tucker Hill Lodge, Rt. 17, Waitsfield, 496-3983. Good Times Cafe. Hinesburg Village. Rt. 116, 482-4444. Greatful Bread, 65 Pearl St., Essex Jet., 878-4466. Ground Round. 1633 Williston Rd., S. Burlington, 862-1122. Halvorson’s, 16 Church St., Burlington, 658-0278. Henry's, Holiday Inn, 1068 Williston Rd„ S. Burlington, 863-6361. Higher Ground, 1 Main St., Winooski, 654-8888. Jake's, 1233 Shelburne Rd., S. Burlington, 658-2251. 1 J.P.’s Pub, 139 Main St., Burlington, 658-6389. LaBrioche, 89 Main St., Montpelier, 229-0443. Last Chance Saloon, 147 Main, Burlington, 862-5159. Leunig's. 115 Church St., Burlington, 863-3759. Local Legends Coffeehouse, Daily Bread Cafe, Richmond, 434-3148. Mad Mountain Tavern, Rt. 100. Waitsfield, 496-2562. Main St. Bar & Grill, 118 Main St., Montpelier, 223-3188. Manhattan Pizza, 167 Main St., Burlington, 658-6776. Morgan's at Capitol Plaza. 100 Main St., Montpelier, 223-5252. The Mountain Roadhouse, 1677 Mountain Rd., Stowe, 253-2800. Nectar’s. 188 Main St., Burlington. 658-4771. Neshobe Sportsman Club, Rt. 73, East Brandon, 247-9578. The Nightspot Outback, Killington Rd., Killington. 422-9885 135 Pearl St., Burlington, 863-2343. Pickle Barrel, Killington Rd., Killington, 422-3035. Radisson Hotel, 60 Battery St., Burlington, 658-6500. Rasputin's, 163 Church St., Burlington, 864-9324. Red Square, 136 Church St., Burlington, 859-8909. Rhombus, 186 College St.. Burlington, 865-3144. Ripton Community Coffee House, Rt. 125, 388-9782. Ruben James, 159 Main St., Burlington. 864-0744. Rude Dog. 14 Green St., Vergennes. 877-2034. Rumble Rock Tavern, Sugarbush Village, Warren. 583-6862. Rusty Nail. Mountain Rd., Stowe. 253-6245. Sai-Gon Cafe, 133 Bank St., Burlington. 863-5637. Sneakers Bar & Grill. 36 Main St.. Winooski. 655-9081. Swany’s. 215 Main St., Vergennes. 877-3667. Sweetwaters, 118 Church St., Burlington, 864-9800. The Tavern at the Inn at Essex, Essex Jet., 878-1100. Thirsty Turtle, 1 S. Main St., Waterbury, 244-5223. Three Mountain Lodge. Rt. 108, Jeffersonville, 644-5736. Thrush Tavern, 107 State St., Montpelier, 223-2030. Toadstool Harry’s, Rt. 4, Killington. 422-5019. Trackside Tavern, 18 Malletts Bay Ave., Winooski, 655-9542. Tuckaway's. Sheraton, 870 Williston Rd., S. Burlington, 865-6600. Vermont Pub & Brewery, 144 College, Burlington, 865-0500. Villa Tragara, Rt. 100, Waterbury Ctr., 244-5288. Windjammer, 1076 Williston Rd., S. Burlington, 862-6585. Wobbly Barn, Killington Rd., Killington, 422-3392.

24 WEDNESDAY PAT AUSTIN, BILL PATTON & ROB GUERRINA (jazz), Leunig’s, 7:30 p.m.

NC. KARAOKE, 135 Pearl, 9:30 p.m. NC. DISCO FUNK (DJs John Demus & Tim

Diaz), Ruben James, 11 p.m. NC. KALLIT MOLLY (rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. VORZCA TRIO (jazz/lounge/funk), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. HIP-HOP DJ NIGHT, Rasputin’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. SW ING LESSONS (dance with David Larson), Club Metronome, 8 p.m. $8, followed by ZOLA TURN, BAG OF PANTIES, HOSPITAL (alt-rock), 10 p.m.

$4. OPEN MIKE W/PICKLE, Manhattan Pub,

9:30 p.m. NC. KOSM IK LOUNGE (DJ Patti), Club

Extreme, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. ACOUSTIC JAM W/HANNIBAL HILL

(hard rock), Alley Cats, 6 p.m. NC. FAT MAMA, I’M BIG AND I CAN DIG

(jazzfunk, avant-groove), Higher Ground, 9:30 p.m. $3/5. ALIEN FOLKLIFE (contemporary folk), Good Times Cafe, 7;30 p.m. Donations. OPEN MIKE, SwahvV, 9 ,h 'r& 'N f^ ;;' TNT (DJ & karaoke).^Thirsty Turtle,

9 p.m. NC. THE W IZARD’S COMBO (improv Rink),

Emerald City, 9 p.m. NC /$10. KARAOKE, Danny’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. THE JOHNSON BROS, (funk-rock), Wobbly Barn, 8:30 p.m. $7. MERCY CREEK (rock), Nightspot Outback, 9 p.m. NC. DJS AUTUMN & LUAP (dub/techno/jungle), Toadstool Harry’s, 9 p.m. NC.

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SEVEN DAYS

march 24, 1999

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40), Rusty Nail, 8:30 p.m. $5. YOU KNOW (rock), Gallagher’s, 9 p.m. $4/7. U.N.I. (reggae), Mad Mountain Tavern, 9 p.m. $4.

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RIPP0P0TAMUS, DYSFUNKSHUN ELLEN POWELL & JOE DAVIDIAN

CLYDE STATS (jazz), Windjammer,

(jazz), Leunig’s, 7:30 p.m. NC. JENNI JOHNSON & FRIENDS (jazzblues; tribute to Billie Holiday), Mann Hall, Trinity College, 7 p.m. NC. WIDE WAjL (alt-pop), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC.

5 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, 242 Main, 7 p.m. NC. BOOTLESS & UNHORSED (Irish), Last

Chance Saloon, 7:30 p.m. NC. BROOKS W ILLIAM S (singer-song writer; CD release party), Burlington Coffeehouse at Rhombus, 8 p.m. $8. . ERIC BRENNER (acoustic), 135 Pearl, 6 p.m., NC , followed by EVOLUTION (DJ Craig Mitchell), 10 p.m. $5. GREG DOUGLASS (singer-songwriter), Borders, 8 p.m. NC. MARK BR ISS0N (acoustic), Sweetwaters, 9 p.m. NC. PERRY NUNN (acoustic), Ruben James, 5 p.m. NC, followed by DJ NIGHT, 10 p.m. NC. THE MULLIGANS (Celtic rockabilly), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC.

HELICOPTER CONSORTIUM

(freakrock), Nectars, 9:30 p.m. NC. LAMBSBREAD (reggae), Club

Metronome, 9 p.m. $4. 11 FOOT 7 (jazz), Manhattan Pub, 9:30 p.m. NC. DJ NIGHT, Club Extreme, 8 p.m. NC. KARAOKE NIGHT, Rasputin’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE W/D. DAVIS, Cactus Cafe, 9 p.m. NC. JALAPEN0 BROS, (acoustic rock), Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9:30 p.m. NC. LIFTED (DJs Mark Bee, Zack Eberz, Cousin Dave), Higher Ground, 9 p.m. $7/9. • LEAVITT & DELBACK (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. GUY C0LASACC0 (singer-songwriter), Jake’s, 6:30 p.m. NC.

BALL IN THE HOUSE, CAT’S MEOW

KARAOKE W/MATT & BONNIE DRAKE,

Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE W/R0Y, Local Legends Coffeehouse, Daily Bread, 7:30 p.m. Donations DJ & KARAOKE, Thirsty Turtle, 9:30 p.m. NC. REGGAE NIGHT (DJ), The Matterhorn, 9 p.m. NC. JUSAGR00VE (disco), Rusty Nail, 8:30 p.m. $5. DJ NIGHT, Gallagher’s, 8:30 p.m. $4/7. THERESA & MARK (acoustic folk), Giorgio’s Cafe, 7 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Rumble Rock Tavern, Sugarbush Village, 8 p.m. NC. MARK LEGRAND (Americana), Thrush Tavern, 7:30 p.m. NC. ELECTRIC BLUE & THE K 0 SM IK TRUTH (funk/rock), Emerald City

Nightclub, 9:30 p.m. $5/10. KARAOKE, Danny’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, Swany’s, 9 p.m. NC.

(UVM a cappella), Club Metronome, 7 p.m. $5, followed by DISCO INFER NO (DJ Little Martin), 10 p.m. NC. THE DOG CATCHERS (rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. STEVE BLAIR & FRIENDS (jazz), Manhattan Pub, 9:30 p.m. NC. EXTREME HOUSE PARTY (DJs), Club Extreme, 9 p.m. NC. RIGHT IDEA (rock), Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9:30 p.m. NC. DJ NIGHT (Butch, Dubee, B-Wyse; hip-hop, r&b, dancehall), Chicken Bone Cafe, 10 p.m. $2. COMEDY ZONE (stand-up), Radisson Hotel, 8 & 10 p.m. $8. DJ NIGHT, Franny O ’s, 9 p.m. NC. TABOO (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC. ADAM ROSENBERG (acoustic), Ground Round, 8 p.m. NC. MR. FRENCH (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. $3. GOV’T MULE, DEREK TRUCKS BAND

(Southern rock, blues), Higher Ground, 9:30 p.m. $12/14. W ITN ESS (rock), Champions, 9 p.m. NC. JOHN CASSEL (jazz piano), Tavern at Inn at Essex, 8 p.m. NC.

THE JOHNSON BROS. ( M * ip c k ) v r

Wobbly Barh, 8:30 p .m. $7. • MERCY CREEK (rock), Nightspot Outback, 9 p.m. NC. ELBOW (blues-rock), Toadstool Harry’s, 9 p.m. NC.

weekly

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9 p.m. NC.

DANCIN' DEAN (country; line danc

ing), Cobbwebb, 7:30 p.m. $5. LIVE JAZZ, Diamond Jim’s Grille, 7:30 p.m. NC. SHOTGUN WEDDING (classic rock), Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. $5. BETSY & DAN JESSIE (jazz standards), Villa Tragara, 6:30 p.m. $7.50. WORLD PREMIERE (Motown, Top

I i s t i ngs

(funk/hip-hop), Emerald City Nightclub, 8:30 p.m. $7/10. DANIEL BRUCE (jazz), Morgan’s, Capitol Plaza, 7 p.m. NC. RED HOUSE (rock), Charlie O ’s, 9 p.m. NC. BLUE FOX (acoustic blues), Three Mountain Lodge, 6 p.m. NC. BL00Z0T0MY (jump blues), Mountain Roadhouse, 9 p.m. NC. EAST COAST MUSCLE (blues), The Matterhorn, 9 p.m. $3-5. JOHNNY DEVIL BAND (rock), Swany’s, 9 p.m. NC. THE GHOST ROCKETS, ELBOW (altcountry, rock), Toadstool Harry’s, 9 p.m. $3. RIGHT ON (disco rock), Wobbly Barn, 8:30 p.m. $7. CECIL BIGG (classic rock), Nightspot Outback, 9:30 p.m. $7. EVE 6 (alt-rock), Pickle Barrel, 9 p.m. $12/14.

27 SATURDAY

Sarah Valentine you might

expect a sonic candygram, but

this singer’s got some grit in her

heart. A former member of semi

nal female bands The Slits, The

Raincoats and Bananarama —

not to mention back-up singer

and much-published songwriter for many others — Valentine’s also an expert on

20th-century women’s pop-music history. She contributes to her own history with

occasional performances — all Nyro-esque passion and piano — and one is this

Saturday at Sneakers.

BOOTLESS & UNHORSED (Irish), Last

Chance Saloon, 7:30 p.m. NC. JENNIFER KIMBALL (singer-song

writer), Burlington Coffeehouse at Rhombus, 8 p.m. $6. GORDON STONE BAND (jazz-newgrass), Slade Hall, UVM, 9:30 p.m. NC. THE X-RAYS (rock/r&b), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. FACT0RIA (DJ Little Martin), 135 Pearl, 10 p.m. $4/5. DJ NIGHT (hip-hop/r&b DJs), Ruben James, 9 p.m. NC. LEFT EYE JUMP (Delta blues), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. MICHELLE LEWIS (alt-rock), Club Metronome, 7 p.m. $4, followed by RETR0N0ME (DJ Craig Mitchell), 10 p.m. NC. EXTREME DANCE PARTY (DJs), Club Extreme, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. N C ., FLASHBACK (70s-’80s DJ), "* Rasputin’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. HIP-HOP NIGHT, Ruben James, 11 p.m. NC. THE MULLIGANS (Celtic rockabilly), Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9:30 p.m. NC. SOLOMONIC SOUND SYSTEM (reggae DJ), Chicken Bone, 10 p.m. $1. COMEDY ZONE (stand-up), Radisson

MEATPACKERS (trad./orig. acoustic), Good Times Cafe, 8 p.m. Donations. JOHNNY DEVIL BAND (rock), Swany’s, 9 p.m. NC. LISA M CCORMICK (singer-songwriter), Rudand Unitarian church, 7:30 p.m.

Hotel, 8 & 10 p.m. $8. GUY C0LASACC0 (singer-songwriter), Jake’s, 6:30 p.m. NC. TABOO (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC. JENNI JOHNSON (jazz-blues), Tuckaway’s, Sheraton Hotel, 9 p.m. NC. ADAM ROSENBERG (acoustic), Ground Round, 8 p.m. NC. MR. FRENCH (rock) , Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. $3. BELIZBEHA (acid soul), Higher Ground, 9:30 p.m. $6/8. SARAH VALENTINE (singer-songwriter), Sneakers, 9:30 p.m. $8. W ITN ESS (rock), Champion’s, 9 p.m. NC. EMPTY POCKETS (rock), Backstage Pub, 8:30 p.m. $2.

$ 8/

Turtle, 9 p.m. $3. U.N.I. (reggae), Mad Mountain Tavern, 9 p.m. $4. LIVE MUSIC, Gallagher’s, 9 p.m. $4/7. COMEDY NIGHT, Rumble Rock Tavern, Sugarbush Village, 8:30 p.m. $2 THE NATURALS (rock), Blue Tooth, 9 p.m. $3/4. WORLD PREMIERE (Motown, Top 40), Rusty Nail, 8:30 p.m. $5. JOEY LEONE & CHOP SHOP (blues), Mountain Roadhouse, 9 p.m. NC. THE DETONATORS (blues/r&b), The Matterhorn, 4 p.m., N C , followed by V EAST COAST MUSCLE (blues), 9 p.m. $3-5 SMOKEHOUSE (classic rock), Cafe

GRAVELIN BROTHERS BAND, AARON FLINN (folk-rock, pop; benefit for*- j ^

Cosmo Dattilio Family), Hampton Inn, Colchester, 7 p.m. $5. YANKEE POT ROAST (rock), Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. BUCK HOLLOW (country; round & square dancing), Cobbweb, 8:30 p.m. $7/12.

www.sevendaysvt.c om

w w w

. B i g H

10.

HARD LUCK (classic rock), Thirsty

continued on page 21

W o r l 'd . c o m

LOCAL MUSIC ON LINE! PU«£ POP IOP 20 • WEEKLY CO GIVEAWAYS • SEVEN OAYS CLUB LIS1IN6S

SEVEN DAYS. . . . . . . . . . . . .

... made in Vermont J e n n ife r K im b a ll (formerly o f The Story)

previews her Burlington Coffeehouse* show at

lit " .

s .

B o rd e rs B o o k s & M u s ic S a tu rd a y M a rc h 2 7 th • 2 p m Jennifer will perform several songs from her latest recording Veering From the Wave, sign her CD, and meet and greet you at Borders! *See Jennifer's full show at The Burlington Coffeehouse . at Rhombus Gallery A Saturday March 27th at 8pm JP Call 564-5888 for reservations!

BORDERS B O O K S - M U S I C -C A F E

29 Church S treet • 865-2711

145 cherry street, burlington, Vermont • 802.863.0539 «Aarww.bsideburlington.com

march 2 4 ,1 9 9 9

SEVEN

DAYS

page 19

ELLIOTT

SMITH

nEws

WITHSPECIALGUESTJ R . HIGH

TUESMHCH30

MENDING THE MUSIC-MAKERS H ealth-care and insurance can be foreign term s to self-em p lo y ed m u sician s. T h a t’s w h y the c ity o f N e w O rleans — h o m e to m ore th an 3 0 0 0 m u sician s — n o w has an affordable health c lin ic ju st for th em and their fam ilies. W h a t’s that g o t to d o w ith V erm on t m usicians, y o u m ig h t ask? N o th in ’,

Phlsh keyboardist Page McConnell is o n e o f th e d octors in volved in settin g up the

except m aybe insp iration. A n d that th e father o f

N e w O rleans M u sician s’ C lin ic. T h e ju n io r M cC o n n e ll, alon g w ith b an dm ate, bassist

Mike Gordon, have ju st con trib u ted a so n g for a

co m p ila tio n C D to b en efit th e clin ic. T h e so n g “Pain in M y H eart”

Art Neville and George Porter Jr. T h e a s-yet-u n n am ed ban d co m p risin g P h ish m en and Meters w as p e n n ed b y th e tw o a lo n g w ith

O N E M AIN ST. • W INOOSKI • INFO 654-8888 DOORS 8 PM • SHOW 9 PM unless noted

LU C/>

vets recorded their tu n e for th e disc, titled Get You a H ealin’, w h ich w ill be released in tim e for th e Jazz & H eritage Festival in late

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 24 S3 21* $ 518*

April. Dr.

FATMAMA/I'M BIC & I CAN DIG

Jack McConnell, a D ix iela n d banjo player h im se lf (he

d evelop ed T ylen ol and th e M R I in his spare tim e) and colleagues at

THURSDAY. MARCH 25 S7 21* S9 1 8 * CAPACITORSOUNDS PRESENTS THE TENTH CHAPTER

L S U M ed ical S c h o o l team ed up w ith the D au gh ters o f C h arity and the Jazz & H eritage F o u n d a tio n to o p e n th e N O M C last M ay. It’s

c/>

a b o o n to th e c ity — b u t after all, N ’A w lin s recognizes that m u sicrelated bu siness con trib u tes $ 2 .2 b illio n a year to its coffers. Least

MARK BEE (PULSE, N) UNDERGROUND, FATCAP) ZACK EBERZ (SOLOMONIC SOUND, VT) COUSIN DAVE (FLEXRECORDS, BURLINGTON) FRIDAY, MARCH 26 S12 ADVANCE S14 DAY OF SHOW 106.7 WIZN & MACIC HAT BREWING WELCOME

th ey can d o is ease th e p ain s o f th e players.

DO GOOD DEPT. N o o n e w h o experien ced it w ill ever forget the

C O V ’T M U L E

G reat Ice Storm o f January ’9 8 — V erm o n t’s trees still bear w itn ess

DEREKTRUCKS BAND SATURDAY, MARCH 27 $6 21* S8 18*

to th e devastation. U n fortu n ately, so m e o f the storm ’s lon g-lastin g

B E L IZ B E H A

harm w as h u m a n as w ell. O n e o f th ose fallin g trees injured M ilto n

o n his w a y to w ork. D a ttilio rem ains in a c o m a in a B urlin gton

ELLIOTT SM IT H

J R . H IC H

JIM ’S B IG ECO

Hs LU

resident C o sm o D a ttilio , b y crashing th rou gh his truck as h e w as

TUESDAY, MARCH 30 S10 ADVANCE S12 DAY OF SHOW 99.9 THE BUZZ WELCOMES

WEDNESDAY. MARCH 31 S5 AT DOOR 104.7 THE POINT WELCOMES

AARON FLINN'S SALAD DAYS THURSOAY. APRIL 1 $8 ADVANCE S8 AT 000R

PORK TORNADO FEATURING JON FISHMAN. DAN ARCHER. PHIL ABAIR. AARON HERSEY & JOE MOORE

FLAN

con valescen t center, leavin g his w ife and child ren in e m o tio n a l and financial duress. Several b en efits have h elp ed o u t a lon g th e way,

The Gravelin Brothers Band provides an oth er o p p o rtu n ity to d on ate — and dance. Dave Gravelin and Aaron Flinn w ill w arm up w ith acou stic sets before

and this Saturday a party spearheaded b y

HEAVY METAL HORNS

the full ban d kicks in. Five dollars get y o u in the door, and another b u ck buys a raffle tick et. K ud os to th e H a m p to n Inn for provid in g

th e room , an d to local bu sinesses for th e fo o d . H eal, heal.

FRIDAY. APRIL 2 S8 AT DOOR

V IP E R H O U S E

MONICA, EAT THIS I haven’t given James Kochalka any a tten tion

for, o h , at least a cou p la w eek s, so here goes. T h e prolific

SATURDAY. APRIL 3 S5 AT DOOR

N O B B Y R EED PR O JEC T THE DAVE KELLER BAND TUESDAY. APRIL 6 S14 ADVANCE S16 DAY OF SHOW

Y ii: f e a t. ROB W A SSER M A N & S T E P H E N P E R K IN S THURSDAY, APRIL 8 S12 ADVANCE S14 DAY OF SHOW

GALACTIC T H E S L IP

FRIDAY, APRIL 9 S12 ADVANCE S15 DAY OF SHOW EARLY SEATED SHOW! DOORS 7 PM SHOW 8 PM

JORMAKAUKONEN (ACOUSTIC)

FEATURING PETE SEARS AND M IKE FALZARANO SATURDAY. APRIL 10 S12 AT DOOR

MAX CREEK NATIVE

i B IN D L E S T IF F SUNDAY. APRIL 11 S6 AT DOOR A 90 MINUTE ADULT VAUDEVILLE EXTRAVAGANZA!

I FAMILY ClRKUS I MONDAY. APRIL 12 S16 ADVANCE S18 DAY OF SHOW 99.9 THE BUZZ & OTTER CREEK BREWING WELCOME

C . LO VE & SPECIAL SAUCE PRINCES OF BABYLON TUESDAY, APRIL 13 S15 ADVANCE S15 DAY OF SHOW

STRING CHEESE INCIDENT SUNDAY. APRIL 18 S14 ADVANCE S16 DAY OF SHOW

LATIN PLAYBOYS FEATURING DAVID HIDALGO & LOUIE PEREZ (LOS L0B0S). MITCHELL FR00M, AND TCHAD BLAKE WEDNESDAY. APRIL 21 S17 ADVANCE S20 DAY OF SHOW TWO SEATED SHOWS: 7:00 & 10:00 PM

IOSHUA REDMAN ADVANCE TICKETS AVAILABLE AT HIGHER GROUND, FLYNNYHEATRE BOX OFFICE, ALL FLYNN OUTLETS, PURE POP, TONES OR CHARGE BY PHONE at 86-FLYNN

OUR CAFE IS OPEN M - F 11-7 P M

CHECKOUTOURSOUPS.SALADS&WRAPSANDWICHES FRESH ROASTED COFFEE/ESPRESSO BAR

B u rlin gton c a rto o n ist/m u sicia n reports that his latest c o m ic endeavor, “M o n ica ’s Story,” is a better read than th e poor intern’s o w n recen tly p u b lish ed tell-all, w h ic h in cid en ta lly bears th e sam e title. O r at least th at’s w h at Newsweek op in es o n its W eb site. T h e c o m ic also g o t review s in th e L.A. Times, N e w York Post, London

.SEVEN DAYS

Wire and M S N B C ’s W eb sh e. K ochalka’s exp licit bu t sw eet blacka n d -w h ite version o f th e n ow -stale tale m ay w ell go d o w n (sorry) as a classic. T h e first 5 0 0 0 w ere sn ap p ed up in n o tim e, K ochalka says, and m ore are o n th e way.

CO SINGLE TRACKS F orm er Lindy Pear bassist Glenn Severance has jo in e d Bag Of Panties — c h eck the n e w lin eu p this W ed n esd ay at M etr o n o m e . . . B u rlin gton su r f du d es Barbacoa g o t a rave w rite

up in E n glan d ’s Pipeline In stru m en ta l Review this m o n th — can’t get better than “b lo o d y g o o d ” . . . D o n ’t w orry i f y o u d o n ’t see

Katherine Quinn arou n d for aw hile; th e B u rlin gton sin g er-so n g w riter is o f f o n a rash o f n ation al gigs, in c lu d in g o n e for you r basic captive au d ien ce at a w o m e n ’s p rison in N o r th C arolin a . . .

Motorplant has sig n e d a one-year lic e n sin g deal w ith E S P N for at-

w ill use o f cu ts from Inside the W alnut for b ackgroun d m u sic o n the X 2 D a y S h o w . . . T h e M o st U n u su al G ig award this w eek goes to V erm on t co m p o ser-in stru m en ta list

Spencer Lewis, w h o plays

“h a p p y h o u r ” at th e B u rlin g to n R ed C ross B lo o d C enter W ednesday. W ay to d o n a te . . . F orm erly o n e h a lf o f sin ger-son gw riter

The Story,

Jennifer Kimball au gm en ts her Saturday

B u rlin gton C o ffe e h o u se appearance w ith an in-store p ro m o at Borders, 2 p .m ., sig n in g her latest disc, Veering From the Wave . . . I f y o u h ap p en to b e in B o sto n this w eek en d , sh o w you r face for

Construction Joe, w h o p lay their first B ea n to w n gig Saturday at T h e M id d le E a s t . . . O n th e air this w eek: Gelatinous Muck slim es in to “B u rlin g to n & B e y o n d ” (W W P V 8 8 .7 F M ) this Friday; S u n d ay n ig h t o n B uzz H o m e b r e w 9 9 .9 F M , M on treal skasters

Kingpins talk and sp in . . . Band nam e of th e w e e k :

W W W .HIGKERGROUNDMUSIC.COM

march 24, 1999

The Cleaners

The

THE STOCKWELL BROTHERS, LEAVE MY DREAMS

ALONE (Stobro Music, CD) — W hat happens when you take a veteran string band and toss them into a stewpot with handfuls of rock, funk, reggae and Latin spices, then hook them up with electricity and a drummer? If things go well, you get The Stockwell Brothers. I was pleasantly surprised by the Putney band’s new disc, Leave My Dreams Alone, with its fine musicianship, smart, unas suming tone and original sound. The Stockwells are Bruce on guitars, banjo, mandolin and vocals, Barry on lead vocals and acoustic guitar, and Alan on bass, man dolin and vocals. They’re joined live and on the recording by percussionist Doug Raneri, who contributes solid, ver satile work. Despite the disparate styles involved, Leave My Dreams Alone has a con sistent sound, produced by the Stobros themselves at Soundesign in Brattleboro. I especially like the anticonsumerist “Beneath the Paint,” with its syncopat ed groove and twangy Strat leads, and “P.O.W.,” which, despite a somewhat strained extended metaphor, percolates infectiously. The Latin-flavored “Love to Spare” goes on a bit long, but fea tures some ripping banjo leads. “The Fashion and the Feeling” nicely captures the trials of working in a bar band and somehow staying positive about it. I like that about The Stockwells; they might get a little sappy at times, but they’re not whiners. There’s a positive, pro active philosophy underlying most of these songs, whether about a dying relationship (“One Way Ticket”) or the once-burned-and-twice-shy (“Love’s Knockin’”). The Stobros recendy toured Europe and the West Coast.;; Let’s hope they come our way again soon. — Paul Gibson EVE 6, EVE 6 (RCA, CD) — On their eponymously titled debut disc, Eve 6 put the power back in power trio with 12 guitar-heavy pop songs all ready for alt-rock radio. This combo hails from the L.A. area and, though they have yet to take a legal drink, singersongwriter/bassist Max Collins and guitarist/backing vocalist Jon Siebels have been making music together for more than five years. With the more recent addition of drummer Tony Fagenson, Eve 6 was good to go, and go they do. Collins’ ambitious lyrics straddle the fine line between clever/evocative and pretentious/nonsensical, but for a kid just out of high school he’s pretty solid. At least he sings about what he knows, like being caught in a “Small Town Trap,” or driving real fast (“Open Road Song”). Eve 6 sound quite like Cake on songs like “Inside O ut,” only with more distortion. Producer Don Gilmore, who’s worked with X, among others, gets some good sounds and playing out of these guys. After a few spins even the seemingly lamer tracks sound pretty good. The better ones, like “Tongue Tied,” with its grappling hook of a chorus, simply kill. “Super Hero Girl” reminds me of Boston’s Gravel Pit — heavy but shame lessly pop. And like I always say, pop is not a dirty word. Eve 6 don’t just show potential; with this disc, a major label deal and national airplay, they show accomplishment. If you missed their previous Vermont appearance, catch them at Killington’s Pickle Barrel this Friday. '• — Paul Gibson

sOUnd AdviCe

In a benefit for the Peace & Justice Center

F R I.3 .2 6 .7 -1 1.FREE

OPEN MIKE THE 99-WORD BUZZVIEW is your chance to praise — or pan — a live show you’ve seen in the past week, and win prizes for your prose! Give us exactly 99 words (not including name of band and venue) describ

SUN.3.28.6PM.$5

ing and rating the act. Winners get their review printed right here, and win a prize from Seven Days or The Buzz Booty Bin!

NIGHT

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■

Deliver your Buzzview to Seven Days by fax (8651015), e-mail (sevenday@together.net) or in person (255 S. Champlain

CONVERGE

NON COMPOS MENTIS

St., Burlington, VT) by Monday NOON, and listen to 99.9 The Buzz for details!

WED.4.7.7PM.$8

THIS WEEK’S WINNER! THE MIGHTY MIGHTY BOSSTONES, ST. MICHAEL'S COLLEGE, MARCH 13: The Ducky Boys opened w ith a set of high-speed pop-punk, thundering nicely and occasional ly shifting tempo in mid-song. The Shods follow ed with a

VANILLA

ICE

INF0.8622244

fu lle r sound, showing more polish, but were less kickass fun than the Ducks. The Bosstones were here to knock the rust off a two-month vacation, but there was n’t any. Horns blaring, the M ighty M ighty roared without

Peace & Justice Store

a set lis t through the hits, as w ell as some seldom-heard

Friday, April 30 at 8:00 pm Unitarian Universalist Church, Burlington Tickets on sale now at the Peace & Justice Center (863-8326), the Flynn Theatre Box Office, Pure Pop Records, Middlebury Natural Foods Coop, Vermont Trading Com pany in Montpelier, or call 86-FLYNN _____

FULL TANK We’re not above u sin g sex to sell

tunes from the “ old school.” Several fans got their

our stuff!

W arhol 15 onstage; however, everyone in the gym got a fu ll w orkout. Class dism issed. — Jeff Warner

w allets bags tw in e gardening b o o k s too!

continued from page 19

21 C hurch St., Burlington Banditos, 9:30 p.m. $3.

RED THREAD (rock), Nectars,

THE GHOST ROCKETS, ELBOW

9:30 p.m. NC.

(alt-country, rock), Toadstool Harry’s, 9 p.m. $3. RIGHT ON (disco rock), Wobbly Barn, 8:30 p.m. $7. CECIL BIGG (classic rock), Nightspot Outback, 9 p.m. $7.

28 SUNDAY ARS M U SICA (VYO; classical),

Leunig’s, 10:30 a.m. NC. JENNI JOHNSON (jazz/blues),

Sweetwaters, 11:30 a.m. NC. CONVERGE, IRE, NON COMPOS MENTIS, (hardcore), 242 Main,

6 p.m. $5. ORANGE FACTORY (acid funk),

Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. HIP-HOP DJ NIGHT, Rasputin’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. 27 DOWN (rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. METRO PUB (DJ), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. NC. RUSS & CO. (rock), Chicken Bone, 10 p.m. NC. KARAOKE W/MATT & BONNIE DRAKE, Edgewater Pub, 7 p.m.

NC. COUNTRY JAMBOREE, Cobbwebb,

2 p.m. $5. SETH YACOVONE & TRENT WEAVER (acoustic blues), La

Brioche, 11 a.m. NC. LIVE M U SIC (acoustic), Main Street Bar & Grill, 11 a.m. NC. BL00Z0T0MY (jump blues), Emerald City Nightclub, 9 p.m. $3/10. GORDON STONE BAND (jazz/newgrass; M ud Season party), Rusty Nail, 10 p.m. $5. JOEY LEONE DUO (Delta blues), Mouatain Roadhouse, 7:30 p.m. NC. JOHN EDDIE BAND (Jersey rock), Wobbly Barn, 8:30 p.m. $7. RICK REMINGTON (rock), Nightspot Outback, 3 p.m. NC.

29 MONDAY ALLEY CATS JAM W/NERBAK BROS, (rock), Alley Cats, 9:30

p.m. NC.

(

802) 863-8326

5 ,

DAVE GRIPPO (funk), Red Square,

9:30 p.m. NC. METRO SWING (dance lessons), Club Metronome, from 7 p.m., $8, followed by DANCE PARTY, 10 p.m. $7. ' HIP-HOP PARTY (DJs), Club Extreme, 9 p.m. $4/6.

We are located across from City Hall, under Men's Room, next to Von Bargens, on Church St., downstairs and conveniently located some where near you! So stop by, y’hear. 150A C h u rc h St. ( d o w n s t a ir s ) - 8 6 3 -T A N K M ust b e 18 y e a r s o ld to b u y to b a c c o p r o d u c ts p o s itiv e ID r e q u ir e d

VERMONT JAZZ ENSEMBLE,

Morgan’s, Capitol Plaza, 7:30 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Emerald City Nightclub, acoustic from 4 p.m., electric from 9 p.m. NC. UP ALL NIGHT (cover rock), Wobbly Barn, 8:30 p.m. $7. THE SPIDERS (rock duo), Nightspot Outback, 9:30 p.m. $5. DUKE DANIELS (alt-pop), Pickle Barrel, 9 p.m. NC.

30 TUESDAY OPEN STAGE (acoustic),

Burlington Coffeehouse at Rhombus, 8 p.m. $3-6. TIN PAN VALENTINOS (swing jazz), Leunig’s, 7:30 p.m. NC. ELLERY KLEIN & BEN WANG

(Irish trad.), Halvorsons, 8 p.m. NC. MARTIN & MITCHELL (soul DJs), Club Metronome, 10 p.m. NC. LADIES MAN (jazz), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC.

198 College Street, Burl. 660-8150

JOHN LACKARD BLUES BAND,

Nectars, 9:30 p.m. NC. BASHMENT (reggae/dancehall DJ), Ruben James, 11 p.m. NC. RUSS & CO. (rock), J.P. s Pub, 9:30 p.m. NC. FLASHBACK (’80s DJ Psychotrope), Club Extreme, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE W/FRANK, Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. ELLIOTT SMITH, JR. HIGH (pop), Higher Ground, 9:30 p.m. $ 10/ 12. KARAOKE, Danny’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. RICK COLE (acoustic), Three Mountain Lodge, 6 p.m. NC. UP ALL NIGHT (cover rock), Wobbly Barn, 8:30 p.m. $7. WAYNE CANEY (rock), Nightspot Outback, 3 p.m. NC, followed by WITHIN REASON (rock), 9:30 p.m. $5.

VINYL DESTINATION! O

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SEVEN DAYS

page 21

wino into Spring .

........ D A N C E Friday, March 26,1999 8:30 p.m . Sheraton Conference Center So. B u rlin g to n Music by

The S w in g in ' V erm ont B ig B and Tickets: $10 a t the d o o r Silent auction All proceeds benefit the agencies of the M cC lu re M u lti-G e n e ra tion a l Center: The B u rlin gto n C h ild ren ’s Space & The C h am p la in Sen io r Center

more information: S 3 8 - 3 3 8 3 or 6 3 8 - / 3 0 0

Tuesday March 30 • 7pm

ro y a l fle s h :

Suzanne Falter-Barnes

M ercer E llin gton w h en A m ericas p re-em in en t bandleader died in 1 9 7 4 , E llin gton n ow leads the D u k e Ellington!

conducts a mini-workshop & signs

HowMuchJoy Can YouStand?

G row in g up, Paul E llin gton probably never to o k the A Train o f his grandfathers fam ous

jazz c o m p o sitio n . B ut D u k e E llin gton ’s m u sic surely ran through his life. H avin g toured th e w orld w ith dad O rchestra in a big-ban d way. H e sw ings th rough the area w ith an 18-piece orchestra and a set full o f standards. How Much Joy

Friday, M arch 26. Barre Opera House, 8 p .m . $10-24. Info, 476-8188.

Can You Stand?

te e n a n g le s :

’uberty. A ngst. Peer pressure. Em barrassing parents. Its no w on d er that adolescen ce is

such a difficu lt tim e. A t an u p co m in g conference, D ou glas G erw in, P h D , helps parents help their teens through

Howto PushPast YourFears andCreate YourDreams How Much Joy Can You Stand contains practical and straightforward advice on how to make your dreams become reality. In HMJCYS you'll find informational tools and exercises that put you back in touch with your true inspirations. Find out how you can understand your creative processes, as well as how to stick to your work in the face of rejections and obstacles. Suzanne presents a 45 minute mini-workshop based on her “Questionaire for People Whose Dreams are Getting Moldy.” She’ll answer questions and sign her book following the presentation. Suzanne Falter-Barnes is a freelance writer from Essex NY. Her essays have appeared in countless magazines, and her workshops and lectures have inspired women across New England.

Tuesday March

30 • 7 p m

the tu m u lt he calls a “T ango o n a T ig h tr o p e .” A form er high sch ool teacher and n o w coordinator o f the N e w E ngland W ald orf Teacher Training Program in N e w H am psh ire, G erw in offers insights in to the precarious perio( o f life that m an y parents w o u ld just as so o n forget.

Friday, M arch 26, 7 :3 0 -9 :3 0 p .m . $10. Saturday, M arch 27, 9 :3 0 a.m . - 4 p.m . $40. Lake Cham plain W aldorf School, Shelburne. Info, 985 -2 8 2 7 .

p o e in m o tio n :

Be careful w h at y o u ask for, so m e o n e sh ould have told Ernest Valdem ar w h en he

tried to cheat death through m esm erism . T h e horrors he w itnesses ufider th e influence o f the radical m edical treatm ent c o m e to vivid life in a n ew opera by V erm on t com poser K en Langer and librettist T im Tavcar. Based o n the Edgar A llen Poe stories “M esm eric R evelations” and “T h e Facts in the Case o f M . Valdemar,

the eerie

Valdemar E xperim ent takes flight w ith 13 instrum entalists and seven vocalists. N everm ore w ill Poe read the same after three area perform ances.

Friday, M arch 26. Alexander Twilight Theater, Lyndon State College, Lyndonville, 8 p.m . Saturday, M arch 27. U nitarian Church, Montpelier, 8 p .m . Sunday, M arch 28. U nitarian Universalist Society, 152 Pearl St., Burlington,, p .m . $10. Info, 626-6235-

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A. V ! p « s C

all calendar events, as times and dates may change after the paper is printed.

nesday

Memorial Auditorium Loft, Burlington,

sorceress betrayed by the father o f her

7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 860-3674.

children. Golden Eagle Resort, Stowe, p.m. Donations. Info, 253-8358.

d ram a

‘LITTLE V O IC E’: Crossroads Arts

M ADA M E BUTTERFLY’: The N ew

Council is behind this magical corned)'

York City Opera’s national touring com

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pany stages Puccini’s tale o f a young

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geisha torn between two worlds. Flynn

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WITH: BILL RAYMOND, RUSTY DEWES, TANTOO CARDINAL, JOHN GRIESEMER Gala Premiere: Saturday March 27th, 7 & 9 pm Alumni Auditorium, Champlain College Tickets $12.50 at door or call toll free 877-676-7541

Regular priced screenings: Friday/Saturday April 2,3,9,10 • Fletcher Free Library Tickets $7, $5 students at door page 22

SEVEN DAYS

march 24, 1999

a rt FIGURE DRAW ING: The human fig

SA X O PH O N E RECITAL: Ben Aldridge blows his horn in a student ses

film

ure motivates aspiring and accomplish

sion. UV M Recital Hall, Burlington,

‘N O M A N ’S L A N D ’: Women war cor

artists in a weekly drawing session at t

7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 656-3040.

respondents share tales from the trench

Firehouse Gallery, Burlington, 6:30-9:

R O M A N T IC PERIO D M USIC: The

es o f Sarajevo, Afghanistan and World

Montpelier Chamber Orchestra puts lis

War II. UV M W omen’s Center, 34

p.m. $3-6. Info, 865-7165. L U N C H T IM E LECTURE SERIES:

teners in the m ood at this “Farmers’

South Williams St., Burlington, 7 p.m.

Painter and installation artist Michael

N igh t” fete. State House, Montpelier,

Free. Info, 656-7892. ‘GODZILLA’: Com e see why he’s “king

Oatman identifies “Phantom Sculptui

o f the monsters” on a screen that used to

Museum, UV M , Burlington, 12:15 P

dance

serve aboard a jet. Rhombus Gallery,

$3. Info, 656-0750.

B U R L IN G T O N C O N T A C T JAM:

186 College St., Burlington, 8 p.m.

Explore and expand your range o f

$3-6. Info, 865-3144.

w ords

m otion at this informal gathering o f

‘M EDEA’: Lars Von Trier directs the

‘FISH IN G W IT H T H E PRESI

spontaneous movers and shakers.

Greek myth about a vengeful princess-

D E N T S ’: In his new history, local

7:3 0 p.m. Free. Info, 828-2455.

in recent site-specific works. Fleming

ou are invited to the 1999 Green M ountain Film Festival in Montpelier, Vermont. Planted in the middle of mud season, we couldn’t resist recognizing Vermont’s fifth season with a gala Opening Night premiere of the Vermont-made romantic adventure story, M U D SEASON, filmed last year in Central Vermont starring Rusty Dewees and George Woodard (and many more familiar faces as “extras”). However, most noteworthy about this year’s festival is the greatly expanded sched ule that includes two film venues (the Savoy Theater and the Pavilion Auditorium), twenty-four different films, ten filmmakers, five panel discussions, and “informal settings” where we hope you dis cover the depth and breadth of the film experience beyond just “going to a movie.” Our goal is to make it a grand cultural event for Montpelier— to be enjoyed by all Vermonters. This eclectic festival includes the best independent, foreign, and Vermont-made films that W O N ’T be appearing soon at a theater near you. You can also enjoy one great film revival (the restored Federico Fellini classic, N IG H T S OF CABIRIA) and participate in many lively discussions about films and the issues they raise in our communities and in our own lives.

♦

Single admission available only at the door: $5 ($4 for students and seniors). Seating for all shows is on a first-come, first-seated basis (you are not guaranteed a seat because you have a festival pass). Programming subject to change. Please call (802) 229-0598 to confirm.

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♦ A fresh and inventive dark comedy, 1999 takes place on December 31 o f this year, and follows a group o f confused characters as they converge on a downtown Manhattan brownstone for a N ew Year’s Eve party. The party turns out to be more than any guests have bargained for: gunshots are fired, psychedelic fruit is con sumed, family bombshells are dropped, and battling lovers and are reunited. Dan Futterman (last seen in SH O O T IN G FISH) stars as the millennium “angster” Rufus Wild; Jennifer Garner and Amanda Peet play the two women in his life. Cult comic Steven Wright is featured as one o f the party’s more verbose guests, and renowned actor-screenwriter Buck Henry has a poignant role as the beleaguered father o f the party’s prickly host. Variety. “Clever and well-written with a sardonic edge....with an up-and-coming cast and a hip soundtrack.” (1998, USA, 93 minutes)

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the story o f Philly, a retarded man who leaves hom e at age 52. BEST M AN fast for wards seventeen years to show us how Philly has fared outside his protective fami ly’s house. Director (and Philly’s cousin) Ira Wohl takes us to Philly’s group home in N ew York City to show how Philly is coping; Philly has contentedly settled in, made friends, and achieves some measure o f independence. Wohl proposes a chal lenge to Philly: that he be bar mitzvahed. Wohl finds a willing rabbi, and the film explores the frustration and elation Philly and his family experience as he over comes seemingly unsurmountable odds and becomes a man. BEST M AN has played to enthusiastic audiences at numerous festivals.” — From Philadelphia Film Festival notes. Co-sponsored by Vermont Coalition for Disability Rights, Vermont Center for Independent Living, and Beth Jacob Synagogue; followed by discussion. (1998, USA, 1997, 90 minutes)

From

Antonioni

SUNDAY, MARCH 28,8:45 PM; TUESDAY, MARCH 30,6:30 PM; SAVOY (WITH DISCUSSION)

Z toichi

♦ From the 1998 Sundance Festival cat alog: "Well-crafted dramas focusing on African-American families are still a rar ity. Thus Ernest Dickersons film, set in the early 1960’s, is exceptional for a number o f reasons, but foremost for its overall excellence in execution. W ith sterling performances from a first-rate cast, BLIND FAITH transcends the limitation o f courtroom melodrama and resonates with emotional power. Charles S. Dutton plays a hard-nosed N ew York City cop whose son is accused o f murder in a racially charged incident; his attor ney brother (Courtney B. Vance) takes on the seemingly impossible task o f defending the boy...As an inquiry into the conflicting ideologies and value sys tems that are often presumed to be uni form in the black community, BLIN D FAITH deserves accolades for all its cre ators." C o-sponsored by O utright Vermont;* Tuesday evening screening followed by panel discussion. (1998, USA, 118 min.)

Downstairs Video offers a wide selection of hard-to-find videos

DOW NSTAIRS VIDEO aft the S A V O Y THEATER 26 Main S t M ontpelier 223-0050 (or 1-800-898-0050 from 12-9)

A ll art,fra m e by fram e , defines our sense o f place. 125 Vermont artisans create traditional and contemporary crafts in all media. The A rtisan’s Hand Craft Gallery thanks the S avoy Theatre for its independent spirit.

ARTISAN S’ Director: Louis Said

SUNDAY, MARCH 28,11 AM; WEDNESDAY, MARCH 31,4 PM; THE SAVOY ♦ Acclaimed British director Ken Loach (LAN D A N D FREEDOM ) tells a love story with a political background, a film about a journey that begins on a Glasgow bus and ends in Nicaragua amid the gunfire o f war. In an original screenplay by journalist Paul Laverty, George, a free-spirited Scottish busdriver (played by Robert Carlyle o f T H E FULL M O N T Y ) meets Carla, a Nicaraguan refugee adrift: in Glasgow. The year is 1987 and, in Carla’s hom e country, the Contra rebels are mounting a lethal assault against the Sandinista government. Carla at first resists George’s attentions, but he persists, fascinated by her beauty and her mysterious ness. Finally, he sees no alternative but to return to Nicaragua with her. “It is,” says Loach, “a film about the possibilities o f people when they decide to be together.” Co-sponsored by Burlington-Puerto Cabezas Sister City Project and Vermont Nicaragua Construction Brigade. (1997, England, 120 minutes)

MONDAY, MARCH 29,8:45 PM; WEDNESDAY, MARCH 31,6:30 PM; THURSDAY, APRIL 1,4 PM; THE SAVOY ♦ Every Monday evening eleven very diverse men meet in a hockey arena to put on the uniform emblazoned with “Les Boys”— the name o f their “garage league” hockey team. Whether they are lawyers, policemen, aspiring rock musi cians, or realtors, once in the locker room, they forget their ages, their jobs, and their problems. After an often unimpressive performance, they all repair to Chez Stan, where their coach— and bar tender— con soles them. But on the M onday night depicted in this colorful comedy— the biggest home grown Quebecois hit ever— the stakes are higher, since Stan has got ten into a jam, and “les boys” must pull together as never before. (1997, Canada, 110 minutes, French with subtides)

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SATURDAY, MARCH 27,6:30 PM (WITH FILMMAKER),• MOHDAY, MARCH 29 (WITH DISCUSSION), 6:30 PM; THE SAVOY ♦ N o film on this year’s “festival circuit” consistently received more praise than David Riker’s stunning film about uprooted Latin American immigrants struggling to establish new lives in N ew York City. LA C IU D A D (The City) follows several char acters, each o f them alone in their corner o f the city, unaware o f one another. A young day laborer, scavenging for bricks in a derelict building, is killed when a wall collapses. Two teenagers from the same small Mexican village meet by chance and fall in love. A homeless father, dreaming o f a better life for his young daughter, tries to enroll her in school. A young seamstress, working in a close-knit com m unity o f sweatshop workers, struggles to help the daughter she left in their faraway home. Riker tells his stories with a directness and art that recalls the poignant masterpieces o f post-war Italy. Filmmaker David Riker in person following the Saturday screening. M onday screening followed by discussion with recent immigrant Gerardo Bahori from Equatorial Guinea, West Africa and Jean Lathrop, former Director o f Vermont Refugee Assistance. Co-sponsored by Vermont Refugee Assistance. (1998, USA, 88 minutes)

Call or write: New College A d m issio n s Vermont College. 36 College Street. Montpelier. VT 05602 1-800-336-6794 • 802-828-8500 (e-mail) vca dm is@ norw ich.edu (home page) http ://w w w .no rw ich .ed u/ne w colleg e Accredited by NEASC

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FRIDAY, MARCH 26,9:45 PM; TUESDAY, MARCH BO, 4 PM; SAVOY ♦ Says New Yorker Ci\m critic Anthony Lane: “The movie-going world is split into two camps: those who have never heard o f Jan Svankmajer, and those who happen on his work and know they have come face to face with a genius.” For over 30 years, Svankmajer has created unique clay-animated, and more recently, live-action films using some animation techniques. In his latest film, modern-day Prague is the setting for a shaggy dog story o f six ordinary, if somewhat seedy, individuals who obsessively and painstakingly create— with-the aid o f the most eclectic array o f objects, animals, devices, and processes— outlets for their sexual fantasies. As their solitary paths criss cross, Svankmajer shows with delicious humor the sexual, social, and political currents in a society still breaking with the habits o f a puritanical past. (1996, Czechoslovakia, 83 minutes, directed by Jan Svankmajer, no dialog)

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SEVEN DAYS /

Green Mountain Film Festival 1999

♦ The Village Voice “An 8 0 s gentrification saga with the scope and detail o f a 19thcentury novel, DELIVERED VA CAN T follows the Hoboken real estate boom and bust from 1984 to 1992, and gives all interested parties— tenants and landlords, com munity activists and machine pols, natives and invaders— their fair share o f the screen...As with compelling writers, Jacobsons great gift is her narrating voice, her abil ity to set the scene or direct our attention with a single sentence and then hang back, allowing characters and events to speak for themselves...W isely eschewing the fly-onthe-wall position, Jacobson admits to being something o f an invader herself. She moved to H oboken in 1980 in search o f cheap rent and proximity to Manhattan; but by the time condo conversions heated up, she was com mitted enough to pick up her camera and hustle up m oney for eight years’ -worth o f film .” Filmmaker Nora Jacobson in person. Co-sponsored by Central Vermont C om m unity Land Trust and Citizens for Vital Communities. (1992, U SA ,118 minutes, directed by Nora Jacobson)

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♦ In a small Tehran courtroom, the sto ries o f three strong-willed wom en unfold as they use reason, charm, pleas for sym pathy, anger, and even a disarming wit to win what they each need— a divorce. Jamileh appears with her son, who saved her from the hand o f an abusive husband; Ziba is an outspoken 16-year-old who proudly stands up to her much-older husband and his family: Maryam has remarried but is is desperate to regain custody o f her two daughters. The New York Times: “This extraordinarily inti mate look into the real circumstances o f Iranian women’s lives shatters the stereotype o f women as passive victims in the Muslim world...The most remarkable thing about the film is that it got made at all.” (Discussion following the Tuesday 7 PM screening with attorneys Sheila Reed and Susan Palmer). (1998, Britain, 90 minutes)

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WEDNESDAY. MARCH 31,7 PM; PAVILION (WITH PANEL) ♦ Last year’s winner o f the Best Documentary award at Sundance was one o f the nominees for this year’s Oscar. Garbus and Stack’s film is an ambitious look inside Louisiana’s notorious Angola State Penitentiary, where 77% o f the inmates are black, and 85% o f the inmates will live out their lives behind bars. The film focus es on six prisoners, including “Bones” Theriot, a wife-killer in the last stages o f lung cancer; Eigene (Bishop) Tannehill, an elderly inmate who preaches eternal salvation as he awaits a parole that never comes; frightened newcomer George Crawford, who must learn the ropes; and Vincent Simmons, who prepares for his first parole hearing in 20 years. Variety. “This eloquent and even-handed film has terrific nar rative drive and dramatic heft...It covers an amazing amount o f ground in its 93 short minutes.” Co-sponsored by the American Civil Liberties Union (Vermont) and the American Friends Service Com m ittee (Vermont). Discussion following the film with attorney Jeff Dworkin (former managing attorney o f the Vermont Prisoners’ Rights Office), Vermont Corrections Commissioner John Gorcyzk, Kazi Tour£ (Progam Coordinator o f the Criminal Justice Program o f the Regional Office o f the AFSC), and Leslie W illiams, director o f the Vermont chapter o f the ACLU. (USA, 1998, 93 minutes)

THE JEW IN THE LOTUS Director: Laurel C hiton

SATURDAY, MARCH 27,8:45, PAVILION ♦

The Boston Globe: "Laurel Chiton’s

vibrant film has as its jum ping-off point the 1990 journey o f a group o f rabbis and Jewish scholars to meet with the Dalai Lama at the home-in-exile o f Tibetan Buddhists, Dharmasala, India. T he Dalai Lama was eager to hear about the "Jewish secret" o f survival during centuries with out a homeland. But in the foreground o f the film is a man who chronicled the rab bis’ trip and was thoroughly transformed by his contact with Buddhist cul ture... Writer Rodger Kamenetz left for India burdened by despair and rejection. His observation o f the faith and solidarity o f the Tibetans prompted him to search within Judaism for a similar strength... Chi ton has made a film that is incredibly inspirational without resorting to sentimentality." Shown as a "double bill" with T W IT C H A N D S H O U T (7 PM ). Director Laurel Chiton in person. (1998, USA, 65 minutes)

Director: Judith Helfand

SUNDAY, MARCH 28 4 PM; MONDAY MARCH 29 7 PM (WITH FILMMAKER), PAVILION (JUDITH HELFAND IN PERSON AT BOTH SHOWS) ♦ In 1963, filmmaker Judith Helfand’s mother was prescribed the synthetic horm one diethylstilbestrol (DES), meant to prevent miscarriage and ensure a healthy baby. For more than 30 years, pharmaceutical companies sold DES to m illions o f pregnant women in the US, even though they knew the drug was ineffective and car cinogenic. At age 25, Judith was diag nosed with a rare form o f DES-related cervical cancer. She went home to her family to heal from a radical hysterec tomy and picked up her camera. The result is an intimate, often humorous, and searing exploration o f what hap pens when science, marketing, and cor porate power come together with the deep desire for reproduction. Shot over five years, A HEALTHY BABY GIRL goes beyond loss to document a story o f mother-daughter love, family renew al, survival, political awakening, and com m unity activism. Filmmaker Judith Helfand in person following both screenings. Co-sponsored by Vermont Public Interest Research Group, Fletcher Allen Health Care’s C om m unity Health Improvement O ffice, and the Commission on Women.

G overnors

(USA, 1996, 57 minutes)

Green Mountain Film Festival 1999 /

SEVEN DAYS

page 0 5

Jcepflon and cash bar, special ticketing for this event only); SATURDAY, MARCH 27,11 AM, SAVOY

Director: Iara Lee

MONDAY, MARCH 2 9 ,4 PM; WEDNESDAY, MARCH 31,8:45, SAVOY

»» | [ [ 1 I f f ; | ^ \

♦ The Village Voice: "Iara Lee’s ambitious new film is both historically savvy and selfconsciously forward-looking— as any doc umentary on electronic music should be. The movie sets out to provide a context (chronological, philosophical, geographical) for the interactions o f technology and popular music...Lee’s greatest feat here is the mass o f interviews she’s accumulated: from legendary old-timers like Karlheinz Stockhausen, Robert M oog, and Pierre Henry to Detroit’s iconic Beleville Three to contemporary practitioners like LTJ Bukem and Squarep usher... Darting from one far-flung corner o f the electronica diapora to another, M O D U L A T IO N S is, within its amped-up, time-traveling struc ture, a surprisingly coherent piece o f filmmaking, inquistive enough to pan out for a glimpse o f the big picture wherever possible." (USA, 1998, 73 minutes)

♦ Fresh from its premiere showing and enthusiastic reception at Utah’s Slamdance Festival, M U D SEA SO N , which was filmed in and around East Montpelier last summer, is receiving its Vermont premiere at the Green M ountain Film Festival. From the producers’ notes: "A lone woods man commits an accidental murder. A young woman discovers the truth behind his crime. Both are forced to find trust in another for the first time in their lives, yet it’s their grasp o f the same delicate thread o f freedom that brings them closer together. A romance blossoms while a man-hunt ensues throughout the state o f Vermont." Producers Eddie Filian and Rob Lewbel, director Anthony Hall, and stars Rusty Dewees and Linda Shing will appear on Friday night; George Woodard will appear at the Saturday show.) (USA, 1999, 105 minutes)

JUfiHTS OF CABIRIA

Director: Federico Fellini

SATURDAY, MARCH 27 ,4 PM; THURSDAY, APRIL 18:45 PM; SAVOY ♦ Federico Fellini’s 1957 masterpiece, with Giulietta Masina as a naive prostitute in Rome, has recently been re-released with a critical seven m in utes restored and with fuller subtides. Peter Nichols, The New York Times: "For lovers o f old movies and the restorers o f same, a revived N IG H T S OF CABIRIA is another battle won. It doesn’t happen often, but in an age o f cookie-cutter fare at the multiplex, a few great refugees from the movie palaces are finding their way back to the big screen...As in most Fellini, atmosphere is all, and here the cinematography is primarily in service o f the protean actress Masina, who was Fellini’s wife. Watching Masina is a piece o f suspense all in itself: wariness, longing, disbelief, bravado, humil iation, hope, anguish. The squalls o f emotion cross her face like gusts o f wind on a sheet o f water." (1957, Italy, 113 minutes)

BOTTLE

Director: Jamie Yerkes

SATURDAY, MARCH 27 ,9 PM (WITH WRITER AND DIRECTOR); SUNDAY, MARCH 28,1:30 PM (WITH WRITER AND DIRECTOR); SAVOY ♦ Five childhood friends reunite at a familiar lakeside haunt in director Jamie Yerkes’ fdm debut, shot at Verm ont’s Lake W illoughby and Crystal Lake. Gathering for a wedding taking place a few days hence, the old gang discovers that some have grown up more than others and some rela tionships have unresolved issues. The fresh young cast includes Holter Graham, M itchell Riggs, and Kim W inter. Director Jamie Yerkes (a Lyndon Center native who has worked closely with Jay Craven) and writer Amy Sohn (whose novel Run Catch Kiss is to be published this summer) will appear at both screenings. (1998, USA, 95 minutes)

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page 06

SEVEN DAYS /

Green Mountain Film Festival 1999

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FRIDAY, MARCH 26,7 PM, PAVILION (CARNIVAL IN QEROS AND DANCING WITH THE INCAS) SATURDAY, MARCH 27,4 PM, PAVILION (PERICLES IN AMERICA)

Director: Laurel Chiton

SATURDAY, MARCH 2 7 ,7 PM, PAVILION (WITH FILMMAKER) ♦ Director Laurel C hiton provides an intimate journey into the world o f Tourette’s Syndrome, a genetic disorder that can cause a range o f strange involuntary movements and compulsions. The film is told through the eyes o f photojournalist Lowell Handler, who traveled throughout North America searching out his fellow "Touretters," including a pro basketball player, an actress, an artist, and a lumberjack. T W IT C H A N D SH O U T is an emo tionally absorbing, sometimes unsettling, and finally uplifting film about people who must contend with a society that often sees them as crazy or bad—and with a body and mind that won’t do what it’s told. The film is shown as a "double bill" with T H E JEW IN T H E LOTUS for a single admission. Director Laurel Chiton in person. Co-sponsored by Vermont Center for Independent Living and Vermont Coalition for Disability Rights. (1994, USA, 55 minutes)

WHERE IS STEPHANIE? THURSDAY, APRIL 1,7 PM; PAVILION (WITH FILMMAKER) ♦ Barnet filmmaker Bess O ’Briens documentary deals with the aftermath of the I

brutal murder of 17-year-old Stephanie Sady of Rutland, Vermont. O ’Brien’s focus not only on the circumstances of the murder; she gives us an intimate look at the consequences for Stephanie’s family and her community, as we see Stephanie’s mother and sister struggle

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with grieving, anger, and hope during the following year. Says O ’Brien: "The film is about mothers and daughters grappling with their own identity and the healing process. It is about having to learn to let go. It is about the reality o f healing, which is never submissive and'never fully over." Filmmaker Bess O ’Brien in person. Co-sponsored by Woman Centered and the Governor’s Commission on W omen. (1998, USA, 75Tninutes)

G oddard C o lleg e A

nnounces

Directors: Sam Seder & Charles Fisher

SATURDAY, MARCH 27,1:30; SAVOY (WITH FILMMAKER-STAR) ♦ Sam Seder and Charles Fisher’s film is a knowing comedy that takes us behind the scenes in the world o f actors trying desparately to find work on television sitcoms. T he protagonist Max (played by Seder, seen here last fall as one o f the unsuc cessful suitors in N E X T STO P W O N D E R L A N D ) accompa nies his aspiring actress girlfriend (Sarah Silverman) to Los Angeles and gets caught up in the star-making machinery him Director: Idrissa Ouedraogo self. Box Office: "A winning ‘mockumentary,’ CABOO SE gets maximum play out o f the shady agents, stressedout personal assistants, and turncoat friends that litter the road on the race for network fame... W ith inspired ♦ Idressa Ouedraogo’s 1992 film put the small African nation o f Burkina Faso on humor, these wondrously cynical come the world cinema map with a touching story about the friendship between a mis dians spit out onscreen every bitter pill chievous young boy and an older woman thought by villagers to be a witch. The Boston Globe: "YAABA is a quietly touching joy o f a film, heartfelt and sophisti they’ve ever had to swallow." cated, with nothing extreme or unfelt. It carries forward in cinematic terms the sto Filmmaker-star Sam Seder in person. rytelling tradition o f Ouedraogo’s own isolated village in the sub-Sahara’s vast cin (1998, USA, 90 minutes) namon-colored savannah...One o f the things that makes YAABA the spellbinder it is is the way Ouedraogo allows us to feel the stillness that’s part o f African life." Followed Sunday by a talk and discussion with Ghanian film student Daniel Damah. (1992, Burkina Faso, 90 minutes)

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A I

WHO'S THE CABOOSE?

SUNDAY, MARCH 28,4 PM (WITH SPEAKER); THURSDAY, APRIL 1,6:30 PM; SAVOY

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♦ Since the early 60s, John Cohen (known to many as one o f the founding members o f folk music’s N ew Lost City Ramblers) has been making films on indigenous music, tracing its roots in ancient cultures and examining its contemporary social role, especially as twentieth century technology makes its inevitable inroads. O n Friday night, he will present two films on Andean culture: CARNIVAL IN Q ’EROS records the annual carnival in a tiny alpaca-herding community; and D A N C IN G W ITH T H E INCAS shows how traditional "huyano" singing struggles to survive in a Peru beset with social problems and guerrilla war fare. (1991-92, USA, 90 minutes) The focus on PERICLES IN AMERICA, presented on Saturday, is on the music o f the Epirus region o f northern Greece, both in the villages there and in the Epirot enclave in Astoria, Queens. Pericles is clarinet master Pericles Halkiase, who travels back and forth between Queens and his native village. (1988, USA, 70 minutes)

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in VT1-800-894-7547 20 LangdonSt., Montpelier K M & S L .B m Green Mountain Film Festival 1 99 9 / SEVEN DAYS

1 i

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AT THF. SAVOY THEATER. FRIDAY 3/26

SATURDAY 3/27 Mud Season 11:00 am

SUNDAY 3/28

Who's the Caboose? 1:30 pm

Spin the Bottle 1:30 pm

WITH DIRECTOR-STAR

La Ciudad 6:30 pm

OPENING NIGHT

WITH DIRECTOR

Conspirators of Pleasure 9:45 pm

Spin the Bottle 9:00 pm

TUESDAY 3/30

Modulations 4:00 pm

Conspirators of Pleasure

Carla's Song 4:00 pm

5 ft

La Ciudad 6:30 pm

Blind Faith 6:30 pm

Les Boys 6:30 pm

Yaaba 6:30 pm

Modulations 8:45 pm

Nights of Cabiria 8:45 pm

SPONSORS: Fiddleheads Restaurant Howard Bank New England Culinary Institute Rivendell Books Sarducci's Restaurant

WITH DISCUSSION

Blind Faith 8:45 pm

Les Boys 8:45 pm

CORPORATE SPONSOR: Northfield Savings Bank

MAJOR SUPPORT FROM: Annie's Naturals

WITH WRITER & DIRECTOR

1999 6:30 pm

Y 0 U S

T H A N K WEDNESDAY 3/31 THURSDAY 4/1

Carla's Song 11:00 am

Nights of Cabiria Yaaba 4:00 pm 4:00 pm Mud Season 7:00 pm

MONDAY 3/29

1999 8:45 pm

MEDIA SPONSORS:

WITH DIRECTOR AND WRITER "vrimoNT Pumuc Radio

AT THF. PAVILION AUDITORIUM... Delivered Vacant Divorce Iranian 1:00 pm Style WITH FILMMAKER 1:00 pm John Cohen Program #2: Pericles in America 4:00 pm

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A Healthy Baby Girl 4:00 pm y

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WITH FILMMAKER

John Cohen Program H I: Q'eros & Dancing With the Incas 7:00 PM WITH FILMMAKER

Laurel Chiton Program: Twitch & Shout 7:00 pm,The Jew in the Lotus 8:45 pm WITH FILMMAKER

Best Man 7:00 pm WITHDISCUSSION

A Healthy Baby Divorce Iranian Girl Style | g | y 7:00 pm 7:00 m WITH FILMMAKER

The Farm 7:00 pm WITH DISCUSSION

WITH DISCUSSION

Where is Stephanie? 7:00 P

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SPECIAL THANKS TO Geoff Brumbaugh, Fyre & Lightning Consort, Margaret Harmon, Ann Lewis and Tim Stokes, Karen Kitzmiller, Paul Knight, Steven Light, Lost Nation Theater, Onion River Arts Council, Pamela Goldsborough, The Pink Shutter, Pyralisk Arts Center, Nora Jacobson, Robert Resnik, Vermont Arts Council, Cold Hollow Cider

CONTRIBUTORS: Adelphia Cable Adult Degree Program of Vermont College Buch Spieler Music Fletcher Allen Health Care's Community Health Improvement Office Gamble's Bed & Breakfast Hull Printing Mail Boxes Etc. Minuteman Press Montpelier Guest House Vermont Public Interest Research Group Vermont State Employees Credit Union

VOLUNTEERS Alex Barrett, Bob Barrett, Ellen Bresler, Berry Carol, Pat Carstensen, Chris Cunningham, Mary Deaett, Jim Fargo, Cynthia Hartnett, Julie Lang, Don Robisky, Debra Stoleroff, Thea van der Geest ...and many other volunteers during festival week

WITH FILMMAKER

ORGANIZATIONAL CO-SPONSORS: American Civil Liberties Union , Vermont Chapter American Friends Service Committee in Vermont Beth Jacob Synagogue Burlington-Puerto Cabezas Sister City Program Central Vermont Community Land Trust Citizens for Vital Communities Fletcher Allen Health Care's Community Health Improvement Office Outright Vermont Vermont Center for Independent Living Vermont Coalition for Disability Rights Vermont-Nicaragua Construction Brigade Vermont Public Interest Research Group Vermont Refugee Assistance Woman Centered

Members of the Green Mountain Film Festival operations committee are: Jane Knight, Gary Ireland, Dianne Maccario, Rick Winston, Andrea Serota, Chris Wood and Susan Sussman. In addition, th e y s festival committee includes Richard Brock, Robert Brower, Dick Jenney, Ken & Kathi McClure, Eve Mendelsohn, Sandra Nall, Jean Olson, Larry Parker, and Dorothy Tod.

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At Burlington College, you can learn state-of-the-art media technology w ith working independent filmmakers—and film theory w ith established critics. Call or write for complete course bulletins!

A Full Selection of New, Used 6 Remaindered Books.

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THIS SUMMER: ★ Film P ro d u ctio n I w ith Deb Ellis

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THIS FALL: ★ N oir: A m erican M ovies on the D a rk Side (W orksh op) w ith Ju lie K irgo

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w ith M ichael Sacca

★ Film P ro d u ctio n II w ith Joe Bookchin

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79 Main Street, Montpelier Tue - Sat. 10- 6 pm Tel. 223.BABY

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page 08

SEVEN DAYS /

Green Mountain Film Festival 1999

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116 M ain S t. M o n tp elier • 2 2 3 -1 9 1 7 M O N -T H U R S & S A T 1 0-6 F R I 1 0 -8 S U N 11-4

T he D uke E llington Orchestra '

M I D D L E B U R Y

S E R I E S

New England Review VO LUM E 2 0 , NO. I

featuring:

Allison Stanger on Living in Prague Jackson Pollock, Superstar New Fiction from Philip Baruth and Christopher Shaw fiction T poetry T essays T performance pieces A V A I L A B L E A T B E T T E R B O O K ST O R E S IN V E R M O N T A N D N A T IO N W ID E

Visit us on the Web at www.middlebury.edu/~nereview

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GOTTLIEB J IR A C E K

M u d season com es early this year — the film M u d Season, that is. T h e m ovie, shot o n

[location in central V erm ont, m ade a splash at Slam dance. Its V erm ont debu t op en s a w eek o f intrigu in g ind ie and [homegrown flicks at the G reen M ou n ta in Film Festival. D o n ’t m iss Spin the Bottle, sh ot at Lake W illough by, and [seasoned docum entaries by V erm on t film m akers N ora Jacobson and Bess O ’Brien m ixed in w ith Italian, Iranian [and French-C anadian film fare.

FRIDAY,

IOpening night gala, Friday, M arch 26. Savoy Theater a n d Fiddleheads. Film screenings, Friday, M arch 2 6 - Thursday,

\April 1. Savoy Theater a n d Pavilion Building, Montpelier. Info, 2 2 9 -0 5 9 8 .

ch ild re n of th e c o w s !l C u t

7:30 pm, UVM Recital Hall

to a sm all tow n . T h e grow n-ups, in the throes o f m id -life crises,

$ 15

[hunt a horde o f m arauding skunks. Teens stage a sch ool play that advocates vegetarianism through cannibalism . lun ch lady hides a tw isted secret. Steph en King? Try V erm on t’s o w n y o u th film m akers and In Jest. T h e “vegetar ian com ed y,” w ritten and p rodu ced by teens, is th e feature-length debu t o f the F led glin g Film s project o f [Kingdom C o u n ty P rod uction s and artistic director Jay C raven. A taste o f th in gs to com e? ISaturday, M arch 27. A lu m n i A uditorium , C ham plain College, Burlington, 7 & 9 p .m . $ 1 2 .5 0 . Info, 592 -3 1 9 0 .

the c h in a s y n d ro m e I

N o t too m an y escaping prisoners both er to bring along the bed o f nails.

3ut Palden G yatso k n ew actual instrum ents o f torture w o u ld prove to the ou tsid e w orld w h at is h ap pening in Chinese-occupied T ibet. Im p rison ed sh ortly follo w in g his ordination as a B ud dh ist m o n k in 1 9 5 9 , G yatso had (served m ore years beh in d bars than any surviving T ibetan to reach the W est. T h e author o f an autobiography and

BEETHOVEN Sonata in C Major, Op. 2, No. 3 HAYDN Sonata in A flat Major (.No.31), Hob.XVI:46 LISZT Vallee d'Obermann from Annees de Pelerinage, Vol. 1 C H O PIN Baracarolle in F sharp Major, Op. 60 SCHUMANN Fantasy in C Major, Op. 17

MARCH 2 6 A finalist of the Tenth Van Cliburn International Piano Competition, 25-year old German pianist Jan Gottlieb Jiracek won top prize in the 1996 Busoni Competition and the 1996 Maria Canals Competition. Since he won first prize at the Steinway Competition in Hamburg at age ten, Mr. Jiracek has performed I extensively throughout Europe I including recent engagements in Munich, Paris, and Zurich. Sponsored by Bruce and Carol Hewitt and Carol Hewitt’s adult piano students

[the subject o f a Tim e m agazine article, he brings his tale o f courage — and the grisly artifacts o f oppression — to [an u p com in g lecture. IMonday, M arch 29- A ngell B 112, U V M , Burlington, 7 :30 p .m . Free. Info, 6 6 0-9073.

call

656-3085

86-FLYNN

PLANTS a stranger at this special “Made in

Mill, UV M , Burlington, 7:30-9:30 p.m.

Vermont” event. Singer-songwriter

Free. Info, 656-1153.

Spencer Lewis plays from 5 to 7 p.m.

SOCIALLY RESPONSIBLE IN VEST

Red Cross Blood Center, 32 North

IN G W O R K SH O P: Learn to make

Prospect St., Burlington, 10 a.m. - 7

money and sense at this pennywise ses

p.m. Free. Info, 658-6400.

sion. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington,

G A N D STORYTIM E: The

W O M E N H ELPING W O M E N

6-7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 863-3659.

r-three crowd drops in for tunes

O PE N H OUSE: Staffers and volunteers

BRA IDED H ISTO R IES’ LECTURE:

tales. Fletcher Free Library, Burling-

celebrate new digs with a dedication cer

The history prof who penned The Return

a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216.

emony and meet-and-greet. 156 College

o f Martin Guerre, offers a feminist read

Common & Unusual Varieties Lots of Perennials Heirloom Varieties Unusual Annuals

St., Burlington, 3-6 p.m. Free. Info,

on old Europe. John Dewey Lounge,

UP: Something fun and educa-

658-3131.

Old Mill, UV M , Burlington, 4 p.m.

is always in store at this gathering

G LBTQA O PE N H O U SE: Outright

Free. Info, 656-4289.

'ting parents and their kids up to

Vermont invites youths 22 and under to

CIVIL RIG H TS TALK: Kim Cheney

learn about resources, events and volun

o f the Vermont Advisory Committee on

TOMATOES

[three. H .O . Wheeler School,

teer opportunities with this gay support

Civil Rights gives an update on the state

Over 80 varieties of

group. Burlington, 4-7 p.m. Free. Info,

o f state justice. Memorial Lounge,

G PARENTS A N D BABIES

igton, noon - 2 p.m. Free. Info, 377. •RYTIME: Four- and five-year-olds

800-452-2428.

stories, songs, fingerplays and

‘LEADERSHIP AM ERICAN STYLE’:

South Burlington C om m unity

Willard Sterne Randall looks at Eleanor

11 a.m. Free. Register, 652-7080 'KIES: Little listeners hear stories,

Roosevelt, Rachel Carson and other notso-histbric heroines. Morgan Room,

and make crafts at Children’s

Aiken Hall, Champlain College, Burling

Winooski, 10 a.m. Free. Info,

ton, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 865-6432.

337.

‘BE Y O N D T H E JUN G LE G YM ’:

Waterman, U V M , Burlington, 4 p.m. Free. Info, 656-3356.

tnurt nursday

Explore the range o f play available to

music

kids at this parenting session. Burgess

CH O RAL CONCERT: Students sing

«ONT ADULT LEARNING

Assembly, Fletcher Allen Healthcare,

into spring at this “potpourri” perfor

fER: Adult learners drop in to

Burlington, 6:30-7:30 p.m. Free. Info,

mance. UV M Recital Hall, Burlington,

up on reading, writing and math

865-2278.

7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 656-3040.

iO . Wheeler School, Burlington,

‘W H Y BE JEWISH?’: M ine the core

O RG AN CONCERT: “Officer”

beliefs o f Judaism at this “Discovery

Francois Clemmons, o f “Mr. Rogers’

Seminar.” John Dewey Lounge, O ld

Neighborhood” fame, sings The Life.of

:30 a.m. Free. Info, 864-0377. D DRAW ING: Share a pint with

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SEVEN DAYS

page 23

Christ as composed by Roland Hayes.

SC R IPT’: Learn how to whip your

Trust, 179 South Winooski Ave.,

check out the latest in furnishings

PARTY: Newcomers and seasoned

Congregational Church, Middlebury,

words into a finished work. Isley

noon. Free. Register, 660-0642.

and fixtures. Howe Center, Rutland,

steppers reel in music from violinist

noon. Free. Info, 388-7634.

Public Library, Middlebury, 1 p.m.

CONVERSATIONAL FRENCH:

4-8:30 p.m. Free. Info, 773-0672.

Bob Mazziotti and pianist Roberta

Free. Info, 388-7523.

Converse with fellow Francophiles at

HEPATITIS-C SU PPO R T

Sutter. Heineberg Club, Burlington, 8 p.m. $5. Info, 899-2378.

film

intermediate and advanced levels in

GROUP: Three million Americans

T H E KILLING O F SISTER

kid s

this informal social cercle. Firehouse

suffer from this still-incurable liver

GEORGE’: Its then-shocking lesbian

‘N E W TITLES’ STORY TIME:

Gallery, Burlington, 6 p.m. Free.

disease. A support group meets at

d ram a

love scene made this 30-year-old film

Kids four and up learn a lesson about

Info, 326-4814.

Burgess Assembly, Fletcher Allen

‘T H E VALDEM AR EXPERI

a cinema scandal. V T CARES, 361

getting along from cat and dog

O U T D O O R JOBS O P P O R T U N I

Healthcare, Burlington, 6-8 p.m.

M E N T ’: Edgar Allen Poe’s eerie sen

Pearl St., 7 p.m. Free. Info, 863-2437.

housemates in Janet Stevens’ My Big

TY: Outdoorsy types from 16 to 24

Free. Info, 453-5532.

sibilities are set to music in this opera

Dog. Barnes & Noble, S. Burlington,

learn about woods work with staffers

EM O TIO N S A N O N Y M O U S:

featuring 13 instrumentalists and

a rt

3 p.m. Free. Info, 864-8001.

o f the Youth Conservation Corps.

Women suffering from depression,

seven vocalists. See “to do” list, this

ART LECTURE SERIES: Artist

STORYTIM E & CRAFTS: Cultural

Martin Luther King Lounge, Billings

anxiety or any other mental or emo

issue. Alexander Twilight Theater,

Diane Sophrin explores the growing

activities keep three- to six-year-olds

Student Center, UVM , Burlington, 6

tional problem find sorority in this

Lyndon State College, Lyndonville, 8

movement o f wom en painting,

occupied at the Fletcher Free Library,

p.m. Free. Info, 800-639-8922.

12-step support group. Seneca

p.m. $10. Info, 626-6235.

sculpting and drawing the figure

Burlington, 10-10:45 a.m. Free. Info,

WAR IN IRAQ TEACH-IN: The

Center, Champlain Mill, W inooski,

‘A F U N N Y T H IN G H A PPEN ED

today. T.W. W ood Gallery, College

865-7216.

video Genocide by Sanctions is

6-7 p.m. Free. Info, 660-9036.

O N T H E WAY T O T H E

Hall, Norwich University, North-

PARENTS A N O N Y M O U S: Parents

screened as part o f this pro-peace lec

FO R U M ’: Rip Taylor stars in this

field, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 828-8743.

gather for support and assistance

ture and discussion. 301 Williams,

Stephen Sondheim-scored musical

around the challenges o f childrearing.

UVM , Burlington, 7-10 p.m. Free.

comedy about an ancient Roman

w ords

Babysitting goes with the program at

Info, 656-2134.

slave finagling his way to freedom.

CH RIS BOHJALIAN: The Oprah-

two meetings in Burlington and

ROM P FAMILY SEND-OFF: Better

Flynn Theatre, Burlington, 8 p.m.

anointed author o f Midwives reads

M ilton, 6-8 p.m.' Free. Info,

known for their annual tree-selling

$32-42. Info, 863-5966.

from his new novel, The Law o f

800-639-4014.

pilgrimages to New York City, the

Similars. Vermont Book Shop, Middle

STORY H O U R: Young readers learn

Romps discuss their upcoming cross

m usic

RED CH IC K , BLUES C H IC K ’:

O N E CH IC K , T W O CHICK,

bury, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 388-2061.

from lighthearted literature in a

country tour on a bicycle built for

JAN GOTTLIEB JIRACEK: The

Two musicians, an actor and a drag

W RITER ’S W O R K SH O P: Local

country setting. Flying Pig Childrens

four. Ski Rack, Burlington, 5-5:30

24-year-old Van Cliburn finalist

queen join femme forces in Theatre

author Steven Shepard encourages

Books, Charlotte, 10:30 a.m. Free.

p.m. Free. Info, 658-3313.

draws on her German roots in a Lane

Factory’s original comedy-cabaret.

wannabe authors with assignments

Info, 425-2600.

BROW N BAG LECTURE SERIES:

Series concert o f works by Beethoven,

Mann Hall Auditorium, Trinity Coll ege, 8:30 p.m. $5. Info, 872-2738.

and regular feedback. Barnes &

MAPLE SU G A RIN G W O RK

An ophthalmology prof focuses in on

Schubert and Schumann. UVM

Noble, S. Burlington, 7 p.m. Free.

SH O P: Preschoolers tap into a sea

“Curing Illness W ith Poison:

Recital Hall, Burlington, 7:30 p.m.

‘O H , VICTO RIA’: Montpelier

Info, 864-8001.

sonal ritual. Green Mountain

BOTOX-A.” Hall A, Given Building,

$15. Info, 656-4455.

actress Sarah Longman Payne plays

A N A R C H IST POETRY READ

Audubon Society, Huntington, 1-2

UVM , Burlington, noon. Free. Info,

DU K E ELLING TON O RCH ES

Victoria W oodhull in a one-woman

IN G : The Vermont Anarchist Black

p.m. $3. Register, 434-3068.

656-2540.

TRA: Paul Ellington conducts the

show about the first female presiden

‘TRA NSFO RM ING UPSETS’:

18-piece big band in celebration o f

tial hopeful. First M ethodist Church

Cross Poets combine cadence and chaos at Rhombus Gallery, 186

sport

Learn to turn your “cons” into “pros”

the centennial o f his grandfather’s

o f N orth Hero, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info,

College St., Burlington, 9 p.m. $3-6.

W O M E N ’S RUGBY: The

with other bright-side seekers. Spirit

birth. See “to do” list, this issue.

372-4347.

Info, 865-3144.

Burlington Rugby Football Club

Dancer Books, Burlington, 6-8 p.m.

Barre Opera House, 8 p.m. $10-24. Info, 476-8188.

E A M O N G R E N N A N : The prize

invites beginning and veteran scrum-

Free. Info, 660-8060.

winning author o f four poetry books

mers to spring training. Mater

TOASTMASTERS M EETING:

reads as part o f the “March Madness”

Christi School, Burlington, 7-8 p.m.

Wannabe public speakers develop

poetry and prose series. Farrell

Free. Info, 864-3529.

Room, St. Edmunds Hall, St.

etc

Michael’s College, Colchester, 7:30

film GREEN M O U N T A IN FILM FES

dance

TIVAL O P E N IN G N IG H T GALA:

communication and leadership skills

IN TER N A TIO N A L C O N T A C T

at the Best Western Conference

JAM: Improvisational movers from

Center, S. Burlington, 7 p.m. Free.

around the region make contact at

p.m. Free. Info, 654-2535.

V E R M O N T A D ULT LEARNING

Info, 878-3550.

Burlington City Hall Auditorium, 7

W O M E N ’S H ISTO R Y M O N T H

CENTER: See March 24.

PHILOSOPH Y LECTURE: A reli

p.m. Free. Info, 860-3674.

D ISC U SSIO N : Jesse Larsen, editor

B L O O D DRAW ING: See March

gion prof examines “the impeach

SW ING DANCE: Folks o f all ages

o f 500 Great Books by Women, leads

24. Spirit o f Vermont Prints will be

ment o f philosophy,” according to St.

get in the swing at a dance-and din

this talk about how great books influ

raffled off.

Augustine. Farrell Room, St. Edmunds

ner benefit for the McClure Multi-

ence great wom en. Book Rack,

H O M E O W N E R SH IP O RIENTA

Hall, St. Michael’s College, Colchester,

Generational Center. Sheraton

Champlain Mill, W inooski, 7 p.m.

T IO N : Potential buyers learn how to

noon. Free. Info, 654-2535.

Conference Center, S. Burlington, 6

Free. Info, 655-0231.

shop — and pay — for a home at

H O M E A N D REM ODELING

p.m. $30. Info, 888-4303.

the Burlington Community Land

A SSEM BLIN G Y O U R M A N U -

FAIR: Home improvers converge to

The Vermont premiere o f M ud

Season and a post-screening reception kick off a week o f indie films. See “to do” list, this issue. See eight-page program, this issue. Savoy Theater and Fiddleheads, Montpelier, 7 p.m. $4-10. Info, 229-0598.

w ords D A NIEL LUSK: The local poet reads from his new book o f verse,

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Kissing the Ground, at The Book Rack, Champlain Mill, W inooski, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 655-0231.

kids

27 Saturday

Montpelier City Hall Arts Center, 10

C A N VEHICLES’: Kenneth

a.m. - 6 p.m. Free. Register, 229-0492.

sport

W heeling discusses how early

‘T H E LOGGER’: Actor Rusty

T E N N IS TOURNEY: Women’s

Vermonters got there from here at

Dewees swings onto the scene with

doubles teams swing into action at

this m oving lecture. National

his one-man “Vermont play in two

this “Mud Season” match. Twin Oaks

Museum o f the Morgan Horse, Shel burne, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 985-8665.

SO N G A N D STORYTIM E: The

music

ax.” D on Commo accompanies the

Sports & Fitness, Kennedy Dr., S.

under-three crowd drops in for tunes

JENN IFER KIMBALL: The former

rustic raconteur on fiddle. North

Burlington, 9 a.m. - 5 p.m. Free.

H U M A N E SO CIETY BR U N C H :

and tales. Fletcher Free Library,

Country Union High School,

Info, 658-0001.

Animal welfare in emergency situa

Newport, 8 p.m. $10. Info, 888-7140.

AM ERICAN HEART WALK:

tions gets discussed at the annual

865-7216.

Story member tells her side o f it with songs from her new album, Veering From the Wave. Borders, Church St.

meeting o f the Central Vermont

‘PAJAMARAMA’: Parents and kids

Marketplace, Burlington, 2 p.m.

film

Walkers stride to support the fight

cuddle up with a good book at this

Free. Info, 864-5888.

GREEN M O U N T A IN FILM FES

pro-pajama event. Barnes & Noble,

BLUEGRASS D IN N ER : Gopher

S. Burlington, 7-8 p.m. Free. Info,

Broke picks tunes for the crowd

864-8001. STORY H O U R : Toddlers listen to

Burlington, 10:15 a.m. Free. Info,

against heart disease and stroke.

Humane Society, National Life,

Memorial Auditorium Annex,

Montpelier, 11 a.m. $10. Info,

TIVAL: Vermont actors and film

Burlington, 8:45 a.m. Free. Info,

276-3965.

makers shine alongside today’s most

878-7700.

H O M E A N D G A R D EN SHOW : A

working off a spaghetti dinner at the

daring indie auteurs in a week-long

C R O SS-C O U N TR Y SKI: Get a

“Career Opportunities Showcase”

Neshobe Sportsman Club, Brandon,

flick fest featuring documentaries by

good look at the Adirondacks on a

adds a twist to this home-improve

stories at the M ilton Public Library,

5 p.m. $14. Info, 247-3275.

Nora Jacobson and Bess O ’Brien and

difficult ski up and down the other

ment expo. Middlebury Union High

10:30 a.m. Free. Info, 893-4644.

TR IO PARNASSUS: “Classical”

the Vermont-set M ud Season, starring

side o f Olympic Mountain. Info,

School, 10 a.m. - 8 p.m. $4. Info,

types from Germany perform works

Rusty Dewees and George Woodard.

863-2433.

388-7951.

by Shostakovich, Ravel and Schubert.

See “to do” list, this issue. Pavilion

SN O W SH O E HIKE: The trails at

etc E M O T IO N S A N O N Y M O U S: See

Chandler Music Hall, Randolph, 8

Building and Savoy Theater,

Bolton Valley lend themselves to a

March 25. This co-ed section wel

p.m. $15. Info, 728-9133.

Montpelier. Info, 229-0598.

moderate-to-difficult outdoor outing.

‘IN JEST’: Director Jay Craven hosts

Meet at Montpelier High School,

LATIN DAY: A dead language comes

dance

the opening night screening o f his

8:30 a.m. Free. Info, 479-2304.

to life when 700 high-schoolers sing

IN TER N A TIO N A L CO N TA C T

first teen-scripted and -acted “vege

comes men.

ancient Latin poems, perform skits

JAM: See March 26. 10 a.m. - mid

tarian comedy.” See “to do” list, this

etc

and orate in the classical tradition.

night, performance at 7:30 p.m. $20.

issue. Alumni Auditorium, Champ

‘TA N G O O N A TIG H TRO PE': See

Patrick Gym, UVM, Burlington, 9 a.m.

C O N T R A D A N C IN G : The Otter

lain College, Burlington, 7 & 9 p.m.

March 26, 9:30 a.m. - 4 p.m., $40.

music

- 12:30 p.m. Free. Info, 656-3210.

Creek Contras host this northern-

$12.50. Info, 592-3190.

‘R U 12’ SUPPER: Gay, lesbian,

M U SIC A PROPRIA: The acclaimed

‘K N O T M AGICK’: This spellcasting

style hoedown. Municipal Gym, Mid-

bisexual, transgendered and “ques

instrumental group performs The

workshop untangles the do’s and

dlebury, 8 p.m. $6. Info, 388-4548.

don’ts o f making magic. Spirit Dancer Books, Burlington, 6:30-8 p.m. Free. Info, 660-8060. ‘TA N G O O N A T IG H T R O P E ’: A two-day workshop teaches parents how to guide adolescents through their treacherous teens. See “to do” list, this issue. Lake Champlain Waldorf School, Shelburne, 7:309:30 p.m. $10. Info, 985-2827. G LBTQ SU PPO R T G RO UP: Gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and questioning youth make new friends and get support. Outright Vermont, Burlington, 6:30-9 p.m. Free. Info, 800-452-2428. BATTERED W O M E N ’S SU P PORT GRO UP: W omen Helping Battered Women facilitates a group in Burlington, 9:30-11 a.m. Free. Info, 658-1996.

art O PEN PAINTING: Bring your

tioning” diners host a community

Saint John Passion and a Handel harp

supper titled, “W ho Are the People

concerto at St. Paul’s Cathedral, Burl ington, 3 p.m. $10. Info, 864-0471.

drama

palette and brush to this creative

in Your Neighborhood?” Radisson

O N E CH ICK, T W O CHICK,

expression session. Art Gallery o f

Hotel, Burlington, 6:30-10 p.m. $10.

PIA N O RECITAL: Paul Orgel goes

RED CH IC K , BLUES C H IC K ’: See

Barre, 1-4 p.m. Free. Info, 476-1030.

Info, 860-1044.

it alone — in the musical company

March 26. ‘T H E VALDEMAR EXPERI

words

K N IT T IN G D E M O N ST R A T IO N :

o f Beethoven, Schubert and Chopin.

Hand-knit sweaters and a silk paper-

McCarthy Arts Center, St. Michael’s College, Colchester, 3 p.m. Free.

M E N T ’: See March 26, Unitarian

DEREK BURROWS: The storyteller

making display weave together at this

Church, Montpelier.

from the Bahamas regales with exotic

gathering. Northeast Fiber Arts

Info, 655-4197.

‘CA M ELO T’ A U D IT IO N S: The

tales, music and movement. Com

Center, S. Burlington, 10 a.m. - 3

TRE BRASS: A trio o f trumpet,

Stowe Theatre Guild seeks willing

munity Center, Jericho, 4 p.m. $3.

p.m. Free. Info, 865-4981.

horn and trombone blows chamber

subjects — and a few knights — for

Info, 899-2366.

SUGAR O N S N O W PARTY: W het

music through the newly restored

its summer musical production o f

your appetite for spring with some

Unitarian Church, Montpelier, 4

thing sweet at Dakin Farms, 100

p.m. $10. Info, 223-4075.

King Arthur’s tale.-Town Hall

kids

Theatre, Stowe, 9 a.m. - 4 p.m. Free.

STORY TIME: Kids three and up

Dorset St., S. Burlington, noon - 4

Info, 253-3961.

listen to literature read aloud.

p.m. Free. Info, 425-3971.

dance

SU M M ER THEATER A U D I

Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11

A D O P T IO N CO NFERENCE:

IN TER N A TIO N A L C O N T A C T

T IO N S: Lost Nation needs actors

a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216.

Everything involved in bringing

JAM: See March 26, 10 a.m. - 4

and production staff for five summer

FIRST BO O K STORYTIME:

home baby is on the agenda at this

p.m. $20.

shows, including The Threepenny

Where’s My Teddy? is the book, and

annual statewide meeting. W inooski

Opera, Lost in Yonkers, Dancing at Lughnasa, Non-Stop Stoppard and Richard III. Present yourself at

the question, o f the hour. Barnes &

Education Center, 8:15 a.m. - 3:45

drama

Noble, S. Burlington, 2 p.m. Free.

p.m. $20. Info, 864-7467.

‘T H E LO GG ER’: See March 27, 2

Info, 864-8001.

‘A RT A N D STYLE OF AM ERI

p.m.

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Sunday, march 28

MUD

Cast/Crew party

•v m t >

SUM M ER THEATER AUDITIONS: See March 28, 10 a.m. - 2 p.m.

Vermonters. St. Johnsbury Athen

kids STORYTIME: Young readers delve

‘T H E VALDEMAR EXPERI

into classic and new tales at a half-

M E N T ’: See March 26, Universalist Society, 152 Pearl St., Burlington, 3 p.m. PAPER BAG PLAYERS: Paper, not

hour happening. Borders, Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, 4 p.m.

Feet play a cool show for kids. Flynn

T E N N IS TOURNEY: See March

Theatre, Burlington, 2 p.m. $13.50.

27, 9 a.m. - 2 p.m.

Info, 863-5966.

SN O W SH O E HIKE: The

658-9689. PSYCHOLOGY A N D BIAS W O R K SH O P SERIES: “Cultural competence” is the focus o f a work

Burlington chapter o f the Green

film

Mountain Club leads six-mile, uphill

‘T H E LAST TEM PTA TIO N OF

climb to Spruce Ledge Shelter. Info,

C H R IST ’: W illem Dafoe is the man

878-6773.

College, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 862-9616.

SUGAR O N S N O W PARTY: See

GREEN M O U N T A IN FILM FES

March 27.

TIVAL: See March 27.

H O M E A N D G ARD EN SHOW:

Homing Instinct author John Connell shares tips on realizing your dream dwelling. See story, this issue. Barnes

JAPANESE CULTURE FESTIVAL: Bonsai tree trimming, flower arrang ing, martial arts demos and the Burlington Taiko Drummers are among the Asian activities at this fes tive matsuri. Ross Sports Center, St.

$3-6. Info, 865-3144.

Michael’s College, Colchester, 11

PERFORM ANCE POETRY:

a.m. - 5 p.m. $4. Info, 655-4197.

Morgan Irons leads a session o f poem recitation followed by a word-wise

‘N IN E M O N T H S T O GETTYS BURG ’: Author Howard Coffin

discussion at Barnes & Noble, S. Burl ington, 3 p.m. Free. Info, 864-8001.

the community. John Dewey Lounge,

DREAM H O M E ’ W O RK SH OP:

See March 27, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m.

College St., Burlington, 6:30 p.m.

and discrimination on campus and in

p.m. Info, 656-2070.

etc

classics. Rhombus Gallery, 186

shop designed to counter prejudice

Old Mill, UVM , Burlington. 1-4

controversial film. Burlington

into the dramatic words o f modern

and take part in the spring equinox

Burlington, 6 p.m. Donations. Info,

sport

PLAY READING: Local literati dig

AL: Share a meal with kindred spirits

Universalist Society, 152 Pearl St.,

brown paper make this troupe’s Hot

words

PAGAN POTLUCK A N D R ITU

“faery ritual” at the Unitarian

Free. Info, 865-2711.

plastic. Costumes made from grocery

from Galilee in Martin Scorsese’s

aeum, 3 p.m. Free. Info, 748-8291.

revisits the momentous Civil War battle, with a focus on fighting

& Noble, S. Burlington, 1 p.m. Free. Info, 864-8001.

film

G REEN M O U N T A IN FILM FES

monday

TIVAL: See March 27. PROM M OVIE D O U B L E FEA

music

TURE: In Cant Hardly Wait, a nice

O N IO N RIVER CH O RUS: Singers

guy must tell the prom queen that he

o f all sorts are welcome at this weekly

has fallen for her before the gradua

rehearsal for a spring performance o f

tion party ends. In She’s A ll That,

Mendelssohns “Elijah.” Bethany

Freddie Prinze plays a dude who

Church, Montpelier, 7-9 p.m. Free.

wagers he can transform the school nerd into a prom queen. Spaulding

Info, 476-4300.

Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dart

film

mouth College, Hanover, N .H ., 6:45

O R SO N WELLES FILM SERIES:

& 8:40 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.

The work o f the Citizen Kane auteur plays on a screen that used to serve

words

aboard a jet. Rhombus Gallery, 186

POETRY A N D PROSE READ

College St., Burlington, 8 p.m. $3-6.

ING: Local literati Pati Austin and

Info, 865-3144.

Anne Holbrook read from their origi

‘PLAYING BY HEART’: Six narra

nal works at the Horn o f the Moon

tives interweave in this patchwork o f

Cafe, Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free. Info,

love stories starring Sean Connery

223-0122.

and Gillian Anderson — part o f the St. Albans Free Library’s Women’s

kids

sweet relief at this seasonal event

Film Festival. Welden Theatre, St.

STORYTIM E: Children from three

complete with a tour and family

Albans, 7 p.m. $5.50. Info, 324-1507.

to five enjoy stories, songs, finger-

SUGAR O N SN O W PARTY: Get

activities. Green Mountain Audubon

plays and crafts. South Burlington

Society, Huntington, 1-4 p.m. $3.

art

FIGURE DRAW ING: Artists o f all

Info, 652-7080.

FLEX MARKET: Pick up odds and

abilities are welcome to participate in

CREATIVE M OVEM ENT: Kids two to five get into the groove by

Com m unity Library, 11 a.m. Free.

ends to benefit the Central Vermont

this weekly session. Fresco Studio,

Animal Shelter. Barre Moose Lodge,

Union Station, Burlington, 6-8:30

using their bodies to dance and pre

9 a.m. - 3 p.m. $1. Info, 244-1588.

p.m. $3-5. Info, 862-4893.

tend. H .O . Wheeler School,

C ontinued on page 2 8

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iT T r m m B A K E R Y -

P LA N G T R O C K 165

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Coming May 11-15: Miss Nude Universe ★ McKenna Mills! ★ (7tew ffleonceto Alwecy? 'ld)etcorv&)

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oage 26

No Cover for the Ladies Jeff Thomas & Ray Savage .H o d S e

PLANGT ROCK Adult NovGlty Store

Return Engagement of the D ynam ic Redhead Duo: ★ RUBY & IVY! * M a r c h 3 0 - A p r il 3

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Fantasy Booths • Books • Herbal Viagra • Movies cix-3» • Lingerie • Magazines G ifts & More A d u fc ~ Open Mon“ 5 a t, Noon"1:30am

p a rts ERIC LANG & RAY SAVAGE 9PM-2AM • 21+ S f-

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TR A D ITO N A L HOT CROSS BUNS! Also. .. Breads & Desserts Now taking orders! M - F 7 -4 • S<£S 8 -4 1350 S h e lb u rn e R oad • S o u th B u rlin g to n • 6 5 8 -2 4 2 2

Y $ r Y V 7 V -;' " C f * ■;* *

■: y . ; f v . r :

a c t in g ‘SW ASH BUCKLING FO R T H E STAGE’: Four Saturdays, March 27 through April 17, noon-2:30 p.m. Rice High School, S. Burlington. $95. Register, 860-3611. Actor-com

classes. Old North End Technology Center, 279 N . W inooski Ave., Burlington. Info, 860-4057, ext. 20.

Take small, hands-on classes in Microsoft Office, the Internet and ecommerce.

batants develop rapier-handling skills fo r the stage.

c o o k in g

A C T IN G FO R FILM: Sunday, March 28, 10 a.m. - 6 p.m. Rice High School, S. Burlington. $50. Info, 860-3611. Filmmaker Nora

‘S O M E T H IN G ’S SM O K IN G ’: Monday, March 29, 6-9 p.m. Isabel’s O n the Waterfront, Lake St., Burlington. $40. Register, 865-2522.

Learn to smoke your own foods for great flavor.

Jacobson teaches this workshop for adults.

a ik id o A IK IDO OF C H AM PLAIN VAL LEY: Adults, Mondays - Fridays, 5:45-6:45 p.m. and 7-8:15 p.m., Saturdays, 9-11:45 a.m. Children, Tuesdays &c Thursdays, 3:45-4:45 p.m. Aikido o f Champlain Valley, 17 E. Allen St., W inooski. $55/m onth, $120/three months, intro specials. Info, 654-6999. Study this graceful,

flowing martial art to develop flexibili ty, confidence and self-defense skills. AIK IDO O F VER M O N T: Monday through Friday, 6-7 p.m. and 7-8 p.m., Saturday, 9-10:30 a.m., Sunday, 10-11:30 a.m. Above O nion River Coop, 274 N . W inooski Ave., Burlington. Info, 862-9785. Practice

the art o f Aikido in a safe and support ive environment.

art B E G IN N IN G CALLIGRAPHY: Wednesdays, April 14 through May 19, 1-3 p.m. Shelburne Craft School, Harbor Rd., Shelburne. $90. Register, 985-3648. Learn about the

8 th

annual

life

Line, 862-4516. Lfyou’re ready to stop

tation for relaxation and focus.

using drugs, this group o f recovering addicts can offer inspiration.

p h o to g ra p h y

PROBLEM DRINKER?: Group now forming in Burlington. Free. Info, 864-4635. Join a group o f people

PHOTOGRAPHY: Private or group, basic and intermediate classes. Grand Isle or Burlington. Info, 372-3104.

w r it in g POETRY W O R K SH O P: Thursdays, 1 p.m. Ilsley Public Library,

fe ld e n k r a is ®

la n g u a g e

Bring a poem or two to read and dis cuss at this ongoing workshop.

‘AWARENESS T H R O U G H M O V E M E N T ’: Mondays, 7:30-8:30 p.m. 35 King St, Burlington. Fridays, 9-10 a.m. Chace Mill, Burlington.

‘SURVIVAL ITALIAN’: Eight-week class starting April 8, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Burlington. Info, 545-2676. Immerse

6:30-8:30 p.m. and Sundays, 9:3011:30 a.m. Hinesburg. Info, 4824924. With its roots in Ninjutsu, this

yoga

yourself in Italian to prepare for that trip to the most romantic country in Europe.

self-defense style emphasizes relaxed, natural movement and distance to overcome an opponent.

for all levels. Info, 482-3191. Get pri

ITALIAN: Ongoing individual and group classes, beginner to advanced, adults and children. Burlington. Info,

BRAZILIAN JIU-JITSU: O ngoing

Info, 434-5065. Enhance coordina

tion, flexibility, strength and awareness with the guided movement sequences o f Feldenkrais®.

BEECH ER HILL YOGA: MondaySaturday, daytime & evening classes

flo w e r s

865-4795. Learn to speak this beauti

classes for men, women and children, Monday through Saturday. Vermont Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Academy, 4

FLOWER ARRANGING : Ongoing small group classes. Hinesburg. $20.

fu l language from a native speaker and experienced teacher.

Howard St., Burlington. Info, 6604072 or 253-9730. Escape fear with

Info, 482-3444. Learn the art o f dry flower arranging and how to recognize common and exotic varieties.

SPANISH: Ongoing individual and small group lessons. S. Burlington.

an integrated self-defense system based on technique, not size, strength or

h e a lin g

ESL: O ngoing small group classes,

‘RH YTH M S OF T H E U N I

skills in English as a second language.

‘TH ER A PEU TIC T O U C H ’:

BEGINNER'S MEDITATION: Sixweek class starting Wednesday,

Donations. Info, 388-7684. Exchange stress and pain for health, with help from this 10-minute “balancing”ses-.

YOGA: Wednesdays, 7 p.m. Green Mt. Learning Center, 13 Dorset

s p ir it

m e d it a t io n March 31, 7-8 p.m. Hinesburg Healing Arts. $25. Info, 482-3002.

Get instruction in a meditation prac tice that teaches you to “begin at the beginning. ” ‘T H E WAY OF T H E SUFI’:

Lane, W illiston. $8. Info, 872-3797. YOGA AT T H E CREAMERY: Tuesdays and Thursdays, 7-8:30 p.m ., Fridays, 9:30-11 a.m., Saturdays, 4-5:30 p.m. The

Discover your personality “drive”with this thousand-year-old personality typology.

Creamery, Shelburne. $ 1 0 /class, $60/eight classes. Info, 482-2490.

‘TAKE A SPIRITUAL Q U A N T U M LEAP’: Sunday, March 28, 2-4 p.m.

Practice Iyengar style yoga using props to align the body.

Spirit Dancer Books, 125 S. Winooski Ave., Burlington. $25. Info, 660-8060. Journey through the

YOGA V ER M O N T: Daily classes, 12 p.m., 5:30 pun. and 7:30 p.m.,

upper four chakras to reset your inter nal controls for the future instead o f the past.

Saturday and Sunday, 9:30 a.m. Chace Mill, Burlington. Info, 6609718. Astanga style “power”yoga classes

‘JO URNEY F O R T H ’: Four

offer sweaty fu n for all levels ofexperi-

Wednesdays, March 31 through April 21, 6:30-8 p.m. Spirit Dancer Books,

YOGA VT, JERICH O: Wednesdays,

125 S. W inooski Ave., Burlington. $40/four classes. Info, 660-8060.

Jericho Flats. Info, 660-9718. See

‘HERBAL STRESS RELIEF’: Thursday, March 25, 6-9 p.m. Purple Shutter Herbs, Main St., Burlington.

meditation incorporates breath, sound and movement.

$35. Info, 865-H ERB. Explore ways

M EDITATION: Thursdays, 7-8:30 p.m. Green Mountain Learning Center, 13 Dorset Lane, Suite 203, Williston. Free. Info, 872-3797.

Expbre and practice the shamanic journey in the “upper, middle and lower worlds. ”

Don’t just do something, sit there!

‘W O M EN CIR CLE’: Six-week sup port group. Burlington. Info, 862-

child

O ngoing Mondays and Tuesdays, 6:30-7:45 p.m., Thursdays, 4:155:30 p.m. and Wednesdays, 9-10:15 a.m. Barrett St., S. Burlington. Info, 658-3766. Focus on stretching, breath

ing, relaxation and centering with Hatha yoga.

Tuesdays, 7:30-9 p.m. S. Burlington. Free. Info, 658-2447. This Sufi-style

the

S. B U R L IN G T O N YOGA:

beginners and intermediates. ‘ENNEAGRAM S’: Saturday, March Vermont Adult Learning, Sloan Hall, Fort Ethan Allen, Colchester. Free. <1- 27*TO«a.m. - 6 p.m. Spirit Qaaceri* Books, 125 S. W inooski Ave., Info, 654-8677. Improve your listen Burlington. $55. Info, 660-8060. ing, speaking, reading and writing

Vedic Monk Maya Tiwari and learn how “Sadhana”can improve your well-being. O ngoing Wednesdays, 10 a.m. - 1 p.m. and 3-8 p.m. Middlebury.

vate or group instruction in integrative yoga, vigorous yoga, yoga for pregnancy or yoga for health and well-being.

Info, 864-6870. Make 1999 the year you learn to speak another language.

6:30 p.m. The Bird’s Nest, Rt. 15,

above. YM CA YOGA: O ngoing classes. YMCA, College St., Burlington. Info, 862-9622. Take classes in various yoga styles. ©

conference

TANGO ON A TIGHTROPE

V e rm o n t

' cafe &bistro

adolescents on a path to freedom

s a t . m a r c h 2 7 th

‘Book. Shop a n d the

Friday, March 26, 7:30 - 9:30 pm & Saturday, March 27, 9:30 am - 4:00 pm Designed to give parents and teachers a deeper insight into the lives of adolescents in order to help guide them successfully toward freedom and individuality. $40 per person; $70 per couple. $10 Friday night only.

lake Champlain Waldorf School

seeking an alternative to Alcoholics Anonymous.

Learn darkroom skills as well as how to choose, use and exploit the camera to express your creative style in color and black and white.

Middlebury. Free. Info, 388-7523.

‘M ED IC IN A L USES OF CU LI NARY H ERBS’: Sunday, March 28, 1-3 p.m. Purple Shutter Herbs, Main

CYBERSKILLS V ER M O N T: O ngoing day, evening and weekend

Town Hall. Donations. Info, 4964669. Develop focus, control and

Info, 985-2229. Practice guided medi

s e lf- d e fe n s e

to handle stress using herbs, essential oils and breathing techniques.

co m p u te r

become a certified hypnotherapist with a weekend intensive followed by home study.

G U ID E D M EDITATION: Sundays, 10:30 a.m. The Shelburne Athletic Club, Shelburne Commons. Free.

BUJINKAN B U D O TAIJUTSU: Ongoing Tuesdays and Thursdays,

dance with grace, rhythm and flow.

h e rb s

Adults clarify career interests and goals in this VSA C workshop.

H YPNO SIS CERTIFICATION: Saturday and Sunday, March 27 and 28. UVM Women’s Center, 34 S. Williams St, Burlington. $444. Register, 800-898-4042. Train to

su p p o rt g ro u p s NA R C O TIC S A N O N Y M O U S: O ngoing daily groups. Various loca tions in Burlington, S. Burlington and Plattsburgh. Free. Info, Help

power through this Japanese samurai sword-fencing martial art.

care e r

Winooski. Free. Info, 800-642-3177.

teach non-sectarian and Tibetan Buddhist meditations.

kendo

b u s in e s s

‘CAREER F O C U S’: Monday, April 19, 12-4 p.m. Vermont Student Assistance Corp., Champlain Mill,

h yp n o th e ra p y

KENDO: Ongoing Wednesdays and Fridays, 6:45-8:30 p.m. Warren

HERB. Get an intro to the works o f

Business Program helps you explore the possibilities and realities o f business ownership by developing an entrepre neurial idea.

8240. Women come together for sup port, inspiration and spiritual connec tion.

Ave. Free. Info, 658-6795. Instructors

dance

VERSE’: Wednesday, March 31, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Purple Shutter Herb#, Main St., Burlington. $20. Info, 865-

B urlington. $115. Grants available. Info, 846-7160. The Womens Small

M EDITATION: First & third Sundays, 10 a.m. - noon. Burlington Shambhala Center, 187 S. W inooski

health problems with culinary herbs and spices.

M O D E R N JAZZ: Ongoing Tuesdays, 6-7:30 p.m. Memorial Auditorium Loft, Burlington. $8/class, $28/all four. Info, 8603674. Get in shape as you learn to

different pens, ink and paper used to

‘G E T T IN G SER IO U S’: Four Mondays, April 5, 12, 19 and 26.

St., Burlington. $10. Info, 865HERB. Learn how to treat minor

SARAH VALENTINE

Ilsley P ublic L ib r a r y

CO-HOST AN EVENING RECEPTION W ITH...

(FORMERLY OF BANANARAMA)

9pm, $8, 21 +

Now open 7- 5, Seven Days a Week! H m a in s t r e e t - w in o o s k i - (SS

r is

reading from his new novel

• * “ ‘ “

.9081

O F

; ■

■

and signing copies of his books

359 Turtle Lane, Shelburne. For m ore inform ation call 985-2827

Pasta • Pizza » Saut6 F R E E

D E L I V E R Y

THURSDAY, MARCH 25, 7:QO

J-i

. - v ; .... at Ilsley Public Libary, M ain S tre e t, Middlebury

C O LC H E STER - 6 5 5 - 5 5 5 5 m arch 2 4 ,1 9 9 9

SE V E N DA YS .....u ..

page 27

alendar

Spring/Show & Winter C le a r a n c e S a le : t h is S a t u r d a y !

C ontinued from page 2 6 Burlington, noon - 12:45 p.m. Free.

Save 20-40% Off

etc

in Burlington, 6:30-8 p.m. Free.

kids

Info, 658-1996. Also, the Shelter

STORIES A N D CRAFTS:

V E R M O N T AD U LT LEARNING CENTER: See March 24. H O M E O W N E R SH IP O RIENTA

See what NFAC customers have hooked, knitted, woven, & spun!

TheNortheastFiberArts Center 3062 W IL L IS T O N R O A D SO. B U R L IN G T O N , V T 05401 • 865-4981

O N IO N

R IV E R

C O -O P .

N a tu r a l c h o ic e s f o r v it a m in s B m in e r a ls ! The Onion River Co-op has a wide selection o f fresh organic greens available daily in our spectacular produce depart ment. Here's a sample:

Children cut and paste to the chase after a morning story. Borders,

223-0855.

Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 865-2711.

PSYCHO LO GY A N D BIAS W O R K SH O P SERIES: See March 28. John Dovidio takes on the “nature o f prejudice” in Campus Center, UV M , Burlington, 4:15

Committee facilitates a meeting in Montpelier, 5:30-7 p.m. Free. Info,

T IO N : See March 25, 5 p.m,

Center Theater, Billings Student

A T

862-9647.

Battered Women facilitates a group

on C lassic E lite p a tte rn s & ya rn s

Burlington, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info,

PO R T GROUPS: Women Helping

Info, 864-0377.

Save 20%

ly gathering at the Daily Planet,

BATTERED W O M E N ’S SU P

Com e see th e new est Spring yarns and kn itted fashions fro m Classic Elite d u rin g ou r open house 3/ 27, 10a m - 4pm w o o l, m o h a ir, a n d n o v e lty y a rn s

- 3 p.m. $20. Info, 223-8034.

H OM ESCHO O LERS GYM A N D

CRAFTS: Stay-at-home students take part in extracurricular activities at the Burlington Boys and Girls

t u e s d a y

Club, Oak St., Burlington, 9:30 a.m. - 12:30 p.m. $1. Info, 860-1299.

p.m.

music

TIBETAN M O N K LECTURE: A

AM ATEUR M USICIANS

GROUP: The under-three crowd

Tibetan escapee from a Chinese jail,

ORCHESTRA: Vermont Symphony

crawls, climbs and colors while care

Palden Gyatso tells his courageous

violinist David Gusakov oversees

givers converse at this lunch-includ

tale o f adventure and atrocities. See

this weekly harmonic convergence o f

ed gathering. H .O . Wheeler School,

“to do” list, this issue. Angell B112,

amateur musicians in the Music

Burlington, noon - 3 p.m. Free.

UV M , Burlington, 7:30 p.m. Free.

Room, S. Burlington High School,

Info, 864-0377.

Info, 660-9073.

7:30-9:30 p.m. $5. Info, 985-9750.

INFANT-TO DDLER PLAY

SEW ING W O R K SH O P: Jean

FATHERS A N D CH ILD REN TO GETH ER: Dads and their kids

Wolvington lends an experienced

drama

hand at this stitching session. H .O .

‘PEOPLE LIKE U S ’: Workplace

K a l e — With beautiful curlyfoliage and very high vitamin A, calcium and potassium, kale is known for building strong bones and blood.

Wheeler School, Burlington, 9 a.m.

discrimination provides dramatic

Burlington, 5-7 p.m. Free. Info,

- 12:30 p.m. Free. Info, 864-0377.

tension in this instructional theatri

864-0377.

C o l l a r d s — With large, deep green leaves and flavor reminis cent of cabbage and kale, this steamable green is a favorite in the South. Excellent source o f folic acid and vitamin A. Also potassium, iron, calcium and zinc.

ing workshop. Burgess Assembly,

R e d Chare popular green own steamed. I potassium and

‘B E G IN N IN G W IT H M O T H E R

cal event. Alumni Auditorium,

STORY TIME: Kids under three

Champlain College, Burlington, 6

listen in at the South Burlington

child-friendly reading at this parent

p.m. Free. Info, 865-6432.

Community Library, 10 a.m. Free.

film

STORY H O U R: Kids between

Info, 652-7080.

ton, 7-8 p.m. Free. Info, 865-2278.

GREEN M O U N T A IN FILM FES

three and five engage in artful edu

STATE TAX LECTURES: A num

TIVAL: See March 27.

cational activities. Milton Public

ber o f entrepreneurs and academics

and calcium. Versatile, mild and slightly sw eet, this be added to soups, sautees or stand on its >ther great source of vitamins A A C, ,-V

^ g fllll

2 7 4 N o rth W in oosk i Avenue, Burlington 8 6 3 - 3 6 5 9 N e w Hours! M on -Sat. 9 - 9 • Sun. 11 -8 ViSA/M astercard/ATM /EBT A ccepted

fatherly chat. H .O . Wheeler School,

G O O SE ’: Get the good word on

Fletcher Allen Healthcare, Burling

A r u g u l a — Native to the tender, slightly bitter green is C

get together for stories, crafts and a

Library, 10:30 a.m. & 1 p.m. Free.

tackle tax-related challenges with

words

real implications for Vermont.

ST E PH E N KING: The horror mas

Billings Student Center, UV M ,

ter behind The Shining and Dolores

Burlington, 9 a.m. - 8:30 p.m. Free.

sport

Claiborne discusses his life and work.

W O M E N ’S RUGBY: See March 25, 7:30-8:30 p.m.

Info, 893-4644.

Info, 656-2088.

See story, this issue. Patrick Gym,

TE E N HEALTH CLINIC: Teens

UV M , Burlington, 7 p.m. Free.

get information, supplies, screening Shd tftatfiifent for sexuaify footed

w %w j\ for ? V E R M O N T ADULT LEARNING

problems. Planned Parenthood,

STAND?’: Author Suzanne Falter-

CENTER: See March 24.

Burlington, 3:30-6 p.m. Pregnancy

Barns presents a mini-workshop on

BLO O D DRAW ING: See March

testing is free. Info, 863-6326.

making dreams come true. Borders,

24. Lyric Theatre gives a sneak pre

‘V E R M O N T FRESH ’ FORUM :

Church St. Marketplace, Burlington,

view of Crazyfor You from 5-7 p.m.

Farmers and chefs compare notes at

7 p.m. Free. Info, 865-2711.

PSYCHOLOGY A N D BIAS

a meeting about maintaining a

B U R L IN G T O N W RITERS

W O R K SH O P SERIES: See March

viable farming community. Vermont

G RO UP: Bring pencil, paper and

28. Racism gets the workshop treat

Technical College, Randolph, 9 a.m.

the will to be inspired to this writer-

ment in Memorial Lounge from 4 to

etc

KICKOFFTHOSEHIGH HEELSANDJUMPINTO NEXTMILLENNIUM...

S t ill cra zy a fte r th e se GREATSTUDENT, CORPORATEANDINDIVIDUALRATES

CARBUR’S Restaurant 115 St. Paul Street • Downtown Burlington • 862-4106

page

SEVEN

DAYS

march 2 4 ,1 9 9 9

free weights * cardio machines * personal training • spinning • aerobics yoga • african dance • kickboxing • kung fu • heavy bag • sauna________

Located on 29 Church Street • Below Borders Books

6 p.m. H omophobia follows in

tunes and tales. Fletcher Free

John Dewey Lounge from 6 to 8

Library, Burlington, 10 a.m. Free.

p.m.

Info, 865-7216.

BATTERED W O M E N ’S SU P

STORYTIME: Four- and five-

PO R T GRO UP: Meet in Barre,

year-olds enjoy stories, songs, fin-

10:30 a.m. - noon. Free. Info, 223-

gerplays and crafts. South

0855.

Burlington Community Library,

N ew M ille n iu m — S ta rt y o u r o w n business! For io years, the Women's Small Business Program of Trinity College has been helping Vermonters develop skills for entrepreneurial success! See our listing in the "Classes" Section for the latest events...

11 a.m. Free. Register, 652-7080. STORIES: Little listeners hear sto ries, snack and make crafts at the

a.m. Free. Info, 655-1537.

W e d n e s d a y

music CLARINET RECITAL: College junior Jodi Ethier reads ’em and reeds ’em at this student session. UV M Recital Hall, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 656-3040.

etc B L O O D DRAW ING: See March 24. Author John Morton reads from 11 a.m. - 1 p.m.; Rt. 2 Radio Troupe performs from 5-7 p.m. PSYCHOLOGY A N D BIAS W O R K SH O P SERIES: See

Mntage Jewelery, Antiques, Linens 8c Apparel

SEVENDAYS. ONEMIGHTY NEWSPAPER.

• 4 fro g h o llo w a lle y • J M id d le b u ry • 388.2799 ;

March 28. A workshop “Addres

dance B U R L IN G T O N C O N T A C T JAM: See March 24.

sing Heterosexism and H om opho

F R E E D E L I V E RY C O LC H E STER • 6 5 5 5 5 5 5

bia” runs from 1 to 3 p.m. in John Dewey Hall. O N -L IN E ARTS ED U C A TIO N

film GREEN M O U N T A IN FILM FESTIVAL: See March 27. ‘ELIZABETH’: The Queen o f England must reconcile ideals, loves and treacheries for the sake o f unifying England. Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N .H ., 6:45 & 9:15 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.

BRIEFING: The Vermont Arts Council unveils a new on-line pro gram for mentoring artists in all

media. Fletcher Free Library, Burl

Y ou r W e d d in g D a y A t S to w e M o u n ta in

ARTIST RECEPTION: The fruits o f children’s artistic labors are on display at this celebration. Francis Colburn Gallery, U V M , Burlington, 4-6 p.m. Free. Info, 156-2014.

M EETING: Utility reps discuss whom the millennium bug will bite — and how hard— at this forum. Burlington City Hall

C O M M U N IT Y DEVELOP M E N T L U N C H EO N : Lawmakers James Jeffords and Bernard Sanders and Burlington Mayor Peter Clavelle offer updates on the state o f our communities. Burlington City Hall Auditorium, 11 a.m. - 1 p.m. $5. Info,

words ‘FISH IN G W IT H T H E PRESI D E N T S ’: See March 24, Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7211. D O U G CURRIER: The local poet reads from his original work at Rhombus Gallery, 186 College St., Burlington, 8 p.m. $3-6. Info, 865-3144.

s e

s t

v e

R e so r t.

ington, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 251-2055.

425-5530.

FIGURE DRAWING: See March 24.

l o

‘Y2K A N D C O M M U N IT Y ’

Auditorium, 6-8 p.m. Free. Info,

art

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n eerie presence looms over A nthony Magistrale’s English seminar. O h, sure, the University o f Vermont professor smiles as he sends cookies and juice around the room, and his 15 students cut the image o f casual, collegiate repose. But the classroom crackles with anticipation. Som ething approaches on the horizon, darker than the darkest cloud. It will tax their knowledge like no final exam ever could. “W hen Steve is h e r e ...,” Magistrale says to a chorus o f sharp, inward breaths. Steve. As part o f U V M ’s annual Buckham Seminar, Stephen King will soon take Magistrale’s place at the head o f his class dedicated to studying the Maine horror writer’s novels and film adaptations. W hile in Burlington, King will also give a reading for faculty and students and a free lecture for the public. The hosts o f King’s visit, Magistrale and his students have been balancing close readings w ith arranging din ner reservations, hotel accom modations and security. W hen the word “usher” comes up these days, it’s not a reference to a famous tale by

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Edgar Allen Poe; it’s about herding audiences into King’s lectures. Booking King was clearly a coup for Magistrale, but putting such works'as Salem’s Lot, The Stand and It on a college literature syllabus is a controversial matter. Magis trale is ready for the fight. T he author o f six books on King, he is also a tenured pro fessor who has taught “the classics” at U V M . He knows the anti-King drill from both sides o f the academic fence. T he two criticisms he finds most rankling are that teach ing King must com e at the expense o f texts students need more — “as though we were prescribing m edicine,” he says — and that teaching King is “dum bing-down” the curricu lum. “There are those conserva tive ideologues that say, if you teach Steve you can’t teach Shakespeare,” he explains. “My argument to that is, in some cases you ought to be teaching Steve and not Shakespeare, because there are certain readers who would do better with Steve.. .Part o f my job is to make literature excit ing, and he does half the work for m e.” It is hard to imagine, based on today’s discussion o f King’s 1986 novel It, that

Magistrale’s seminar students would not do well with the Bard. The class attacks the text like Cujo. W ell-thumbed copies in hand, they debate such themes as the past reflected in the present, haunted towns, the nature o f evil, repression, cycles, chil dren as symbols o f innocence and goodness, rites o f passage. The names Walt W hitman and W illiam Carlos Williams come up. A late arrival to class might mistake the spirit ed exchange for a deconstruc tion o f Poe, Hawthorne, Faulkner or — the subject o f Magistrale’s doctoral disserta tion — Flannery O ’Connor. And that’s just the point. “It’s literature,” Magistrale says. “You can find the classi cal themes in K ing...about hubris and the crossing o f barriers that humans were not meant to cross, the attempt to play God. These are the issues that great literature is built on. Hang out in Magistrale’s seminar long enough, and you’ll hear other assessments o f King’s work that his fans and “conservative ideologues” alike might find surprising. The question on students’ minds as King’s arrival draws near is whether he’ll be sur-' prised by their interpretations — about homophobia in Salem’s Lot, parallels between Ne\\v England towns" arid thd W ild West, pop culture as sal vation or evil. If King hears a new inter pretation, it won’t be the first time. Magistrale’s first meet ing with the author was 'at a conference at which he pre sented a paper positing King’s “Children o f the Corn” as a metaphor for U.S. involve ment in Vietnam. That was news to King. “Oh, god. It was not a good introduction,” Magistrale groans. “Later on, in one o f his interviews he went to work on me about how that was never his inten tion in writing that story, and that it had been totally mis read.” As to the value o f studying King, Magistrale says, “I’m hoping that...somewhere down the line, a student will look back on this and say, ‘You know, there was the time that I lost my virginity at U V M and the time that I took that Stephen King course. Those were the two moments at the University of Vermont that represent my transition into adulthood. And they meant different things for me, but they were both very important.” And a little scary. (Z) Stephen King w ill give a free lecture a t U V M ’s Patrick Gym March 30, 7 p. m. For tickets, call 656-4037.

The Show Must Go On. And On. And On. And On... arbara Walters thought we m ight be interested in hearing about Liz Taylor’s brain tumor. Geena Davis felt we should focus on Oscar night fashion. W hoopi Goldberg believed the country was not yet tired o f Linda Tripp jokes. W ho knows — maybe the country was just tired. It was past m idnight, after all. At any rate, I had other things on m y m ind through m uch o f Sunday’s longwinded Academy Awards broadcast, including the recent deaths o f two m en whose work rocked the world o f filmmak ing. If you ask me, the human race pays way too m uch atten tion to the movies these days. People used to go to them to escape. N ow it’s all but im pos sible to escape the movies themselves. M orning shows, talk shows, celebrity kiss-ups like “Entertainment T onight,” even cable news services all seem to exist for little more than providing free prom otion

al airtime to the major studios. Look, it’s Matt Lauer “inter viewing” a starlet. H ow thoughtful o f C N N to “pre view” the weekend’s new releas es. The whole planet has gone to H ollyw ood in a handbasket, and one o f the two biggest rea sons this happened was Gene Siskel. Before he and Roger Ebert took their cinematic wrestling match to PBS in 1975, there wasn’t a whole lot o f film criti cism on TV. I dimly recall a Rex Reed review or two, but he, like everybody else at the time, evidently thought televi sion a m edium best suited for schm oozing with stars. It wasn’t until rival newspaper critics Siskel and Ebert began doing their show that most Amer icans had regular exposure to thoughtful professional film citicism. A m ong their many gifts was the ability both men had to make their exchanges both provocative and accessible. W atching their first show, “Sneak Previews,” on PBS, and

later the syndicated spin-off, “At the M ovies,” was a defining and formative experience for me. Getting paid for going to the movies — where do I sign up? Over time the two became stars themselves. They became an extension o f the Hollywood machinery and, in m y opinion, their judgment became suspect. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve given some dreadful piece o f flotsam a withering review only to find it given “two thumbs up” in its T V ads. If they both weren’t already so rich, and if Siskel didn’t seem like such a sweet, sincere guy, I would have suspected some sort o f payola. Millions o f people watched the Siskel and Ebert show. Television executives noted this and calculated that the public would watch other program ming dealing with show busi ness, too. They were right. The public now watches little else. Siskel’s is a mixed legacy. On one hand he informed and entertained us. I will miss the twinkle in his eye as he patient ly waited out that windbag part ner o f his. O n the other, he helped bring about this tiresome new world order, this insipid showbiz-driven culture. By treating so many stupid, incon sequential and forgettable films as though they merited serious comment, he helped lower the bar and make the way safe for mindlessness and mediocrity. In that regard, I don’t think Siskel and Ebert did anyone any great favor. N o one outside the major studios, anyway.

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BV M A fL

By contrast, the career o f Stanley Kubrick was emblemat ic o f everything noble and admirable in the business. N o one has taken the art form deeper, higher or further out. Unlike many o f the most tal ented directors o f his time — Coppola and Spielberg among them — Kubrick never spent his time on mainstream non

m ost people’s lives? In m y view, Spielberg’s lat est offered little more than a state-of-the-art arcade experi ence, a digital-effects exhibition full o f sound and fury but sig nifying almost nothing — except a chance for moviegoers to pay $7 to “see what it felt like to be right there.” C om pare this picture w ith its flip-

Can you think of one other industry that m akes so much crap and then pats itself on the back in front of the whole world for having done so ? sense so that he’d later have the m oney to make a masterpiece. He only made masterpieces. I know almost nothing about the man but, like every film lover, I know his work intimately. Dr. Strangelove; 2001: A Space Odyssey; A Clockwork Orange; Barry Lyndon; The Shining; Full M etal Jacket. There isn’t a filmmaker alive today who could have made even one o f these. Kubrick’s films are, as much as anything else, the reason I wanted to write about movies. I vividly remember the night I first saw 2001 in a theater. I was 16 years old, and have been waiting for another night like that ever since. I think I will wait a very long time. W hich brings us to the awards, a lot o f pom p and puff whose purpose is to dis tract attention from the fact that H ollyw ood makes hun dreds o f awful movies each year by spotlighting a dozen or so which don’t entirely blow. This year the loopiest line o f pre-game thinking was the notion that Saving Private Ryan was a Best Picture shoein, because voting against it would be akin to opposing the American victory in World War II. Pundit after showbiz pundit kept a straight face as they shared their savvy take on the situation w ith viewers. A vote for Ryan was a vote for an entire generation o f Americans who fought the war. H ow could anyone not vote for our own fathers? This made about as m uch sense as giving Elia Kazan a Lifetime Achievement Award. W hat is that, anyway — an award for screwing up the

side, Schindlers List. In almost every respect, it pales. Ryans characters, storyline and uniqueness o f vision seem stunted next to those o f its masterful predecessor. So there was som e justice in its being defeated by Shakespeare in Love. T h ou gh the obvious question was: W lio directed the Best Picture if n ot the Best D irector (Spielberg)? Shakes-peares John M adden has to be w ondering w hat he did to qualify for the nom in a tion, besides m aking the year’s best film . Anyway, those Oscars do go on, don’t they? Can you think o f one other industry that makes so m uch crap and then pats itself on the back in front o f the w hole w orld for having done so? T h e speeches, the needless dance numbers, the endless songs, tributes, m ontages, boring costum e segm ents. A nd more tributes. People didn’t m ake this big a fuss on V E Day. A nd w hat was the deal w ith that set? It looked like Batm ans gazebo.

march 2 4 ,1 9 9 9

O f course, in the lengthy telecast, there were one or two moments o f sanity and charm: Roberto Benigni standing on Steven Spielberg’s seat. Jim Carrey’s hilarious comments on his non-nomi nation. That horse who couldn’t get away from Val Kilmer fast enough. And the fact that someone behind the scenes was thinking about Gene Siskel and Stanley Kubrick, though I’m not sure the goodbyes did them jus tice. But maybe there wasn’t time — the show is only four hours long. (7)

SEVEN

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folk art from the permanent collec tion. T.W. W ood Gallery, -

Center, St. M ichaels C ollege,

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featuring recorded stories by Vermonters aged 10 to 90. Vermont Folklife Center, M iddlebury, 3 8 8 4 9 6 4 . T hrough April. 18 AM ERICAN PAINTINGS FROM THE SHELBURNE M U SEU M , includ

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lifes. M iddlebury College. M useum

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Fletcher R oom , Fletcher Free Libary,

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NORTHERN GOT ART, paintings, sculpture and photography by eight BFA students at Johnson State College. Flowershop Gallery, Johnson, 6 3 5 2 6 9 4 . Through March 29. ELAINE BALDWIN, a G .R .A .C .E. artist exhibits works in watercolor and marker. Johnson Artisan Shop, 6 3 5 -9 8 0 9 . Through March. W ORK FROM THE VERMONT CLAY

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paintings by Vermont artists

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Kathleen Kolb, T hom as Curtin,

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C ynthia Price and more. Clarke

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IM P R E SSIO N S, oil paintings by Lorraine C. Manley. Sugar M ill Art

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March.

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Plattsburgh Art M useum , Burke

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the Visual Arts, R udand, 7 7 5 -0 3 5 6 .

April 4.

Through April 15.

MONET AT GIVERNY, Masterpieces

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M ontpelier, 8 2 8 -3 3 3 3 . T hrough March.

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ARLENE HANSON, nature photogra

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M ontreal, 5 1 4 -2 8 5 -1 6 0 0 . T hrough

phy. C ity H all Artists’ Showcase, M ontpelier, 2 2 9 -2 7 6 6 . T hrough M arch 27. CHANGING LIGHT, oil landscapes by Carrie Rouillard. Phoenix Rising, M ontpelier, 2 2 9 -0 5 2 2 . T hrough March. M UD M A D N E SS, an exhibit o f works in clay by resident and stu m ers. Frog H ollow , V erm ont

...

PLEASE NOTE: Seven Days is unable to accommodate all of the dis plays in our readership area, thus these listings must be restricted to exhibits in truly public viewing places. Art in business offices, lobbies and private residences or studios, with occasional exceptions, wtU not be accepted.

By M

arc

Awodey

arch seems to be m onotype m onth at Doll-Anstadt Gallery, and both o f the fea tured artists — Diane Gabriel o f Burlington and Sandy _ Hartley o f Putney — appear to be technical masters o f the medium. Both invent elegant visual timbres by permitting spontaneous textur^i to remain in the image, and in their strongest works, both allow'viewers to fully appreci ate these random acts by keeping their images arrestingly simple. Gabriel’s compositional plainness — primarily wom en’s garments — is a departure point from which she adds twists o f increasing conceptual complexity. Her images, centered in vigorously executed fields o f muted value, contain resonant sur face layers often reworked with pastel. The loom ing lifesized image, “For Those W ho Came Before,” fills a large vertical space with a 19thcentury skirt in stately blues and indigos, suspended in a purple field. Gabriel has ani mated these overflowing hues with hints o f complementary yellow and orange. But with even greater sophistication, the image is pressed onto abutted layers o f heavy paper, giving it an almost sculptural presence. For other prints Gabriel has run actual corsets and neck pieces directly through a press, resulting in images o f actual size. “Bone Corset IV” seems petite to the point o f suffocation — as it probably was on its original wearer. Gabriel’s works, like those o f local artist Leslie Fry, general ly contain a feminist impera tive that is most powerful at its m ost subtle. The snail’s pace o f social evolution is graphically indicated in Gabriel’s single-framed dip tych, “Two neck pieces a cen tury apart.” In this two-tier horizontal work, ghosts o f buttons and oppressive bone

stays are embedded in the “tread” o f the textile, like fig ments from a fossilized fish preserved between layers o f sedimentary stone. “Two neck pieces” also contains smears and blobs o f color, and myste rious flakes o f glitter that give its rough accents o f purple, gray and blue the look o f sandpaper. Hartley shows an appreci

o f J.M.W. Turner. “MoQnlight in the W oods” is somewhat more com plex, as Back-lit trees create a dark middle ground, w ith a patch o f brightness spilling into the fore. Echoes o f John Constable appear in the pastoral print “Horse Pasture, September,” a lush knoll is balanced by a bit o f pasturage on the right,

“ H orse P a stu re , M a rc h ,” m o n o typ e, by S an d y H artle y.

ation for the abstract elements that result from brushing and w iping ink upon her plates, though her work is less sure footed when she veers from traditional landscape. Those pieces, such as “October Storm,” “M oonlight in the W oods” and “Horse Pasture, September” do not attempt anything particularly clever, but on the other hand this straightforwardness lends them veracity. Working w ith in age-old parameters and using tried-and-true com posi tions, Hartley perfectly inte grates subject and m edium in glorious black and white. “October Storm” consists o f a sinewy road at the left o f the picture m oving toward a high, rolling horizon o f hills. An anarchy o f clouds gathers at the top o f the picture, and an area o f dark pasture, stage right, balances o ff the road. It com bines the m oodiness o f A.P. Ryder with the looseness

where two abstracted white horses feed oblivious to any audience. All three works are exceptionally well-executed, full o f confident and varied surface manipulation. Other series, however, such as the “Bike Ride” prints, depicting shadows o f . bicycles where the rubber hits the road, and “W alking the D o g ” prints, w hich look \ down a leash towards a happy pooch, seem to have no particular reason for being . m onotypes. Why- not pho tographs, or drawings?. ■ Hartley also leaves basic com positional issues untended in these pieces. Edges and cor ners o f the picture plane lack anim ation, and proportions — the shapes o f cows, the tracks o f tires, parallel lines — repeat identically where they should have been varied. These are not the kind o f “random” acts that make an exhibit engaging. 0

Diane Gabriel, “Third Generation Dressmaking,’’^and Sandy Hartley, “Enigmatic Moments.” Doll-Anstadt Gallery, Burlington. Through March.

Center, M iddlebury, ‘ •-'Vv v ■w; * •

march 24, 1999

SEVEN DAYS

page 33

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through scenes in which Washington says final good byes to his wife and little girl. Eastwood reads up on the case in preparation for his visit to death row and, by the time he and the condemned man meet, C lint’s convinced o f his innocence. Sensing that saving the man’s life could mean his own salvation as well, Eastwood scrambles to rustle up a sufficient rea son for the governor to make a last-minute call to the exe cution chamber. As the hours and, finally, the minutes run out, tension builds to the brink o f explosion. DEATH SENTENCES A ro u tin e story turns into a ra c e As with a lot o f East a g a in s t th e c lo c k fo r a re p o rte r p layed by C lin t Eastw ood. w ood’s films, the greatest pleasures are in the smallest details: A lifestyle TRUE CRIME***172 editor at the paper whose every remark contains As a director, Clint Eastwood possesses an a com ic reference to some sociological trend; a unfussy matter-of-factness, a uniquely econom i fine, flustered performance from D enis Leary as cal non-style. As a screen presence, he’s come to a city editor who knows his wife is involved with inhabit a ragged, cadaverous reality. In his latest Clint. In an afternoon at the zoo with his daugh film, these distinctions combine to elevate a ter, Eastwood uncovers a lead he needs to follow, somewhat routine potboiler into something but he can’t bear to disappoint his daughter. The more. solution? “Speed Z oo” — an initially hilarious True Crime is adapted from the 1997 best sequence in which Clint dumps the child in a seller by Andrew Klavan. Clint stars as a downstroller and streaks by the various exhibits like on-his-luck reporter, an aging womanizer and ex the place was on fire. drunk just one wrong move from losing every The story, though fairly standard in its struc thing — his wife, his daughter, his reputation ture, is effectively told. A number o f loose ends and his job. Luckily, the thread his job is hang are left dangling: W hy does the condem ned man ing by happens to be in the hands o f James drink two six-packs o f Coke shortly before he’s Woods, who snaps, crackles and pops here as scheduled to be executed? W hy did the chief wit Eastwood’s editor. H e’s a colorful co-conspirator ness in the case say he saw a gun in W ashington’s who will go to bat for his old friend so long as it hand when he didn’t? I suspect, however, that doesn’t risk his getting thrown out o f the game these were merely the result o f edits made to trim himself. the movie’s running time and, at any rate, they Early on, a young writer at the paper dies in a don’t dim inish the picture’s suspensefulness by a car wreck. Eastwood gets tossed the softball single bead o f sweat. assignment she was unable to complete — an Eastwood’s a unique figure in American filmexecution-day interview with a black mechanic making. As an actor and, especially, as a director convicted o f murdering a young white shop he’s only gotten better with age. His recent string clerk. Isaiah Washington co-stars as the inmate o f adaptations — including the overpraisedwho, after years o f trials and appeals, is just Bridges o f Madison County and the underappreci hours away from death by lethal injection. ated M idnight in the Garden o f Good an d E v il— T he picture’s twin focus allows us to watch comprise a fascinating chapter in the career o f an Eastwood’s character carelessly put his place in artist who shows no sign o f com ing to the end o f his family at risk, while we simultaneously wince his story. ®

FRIDAY. MARCH 2 6 showtimes

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Shelburne Road, S. Burlington, 864-5610 Doug’s First Movie* 12, 1:50, 3:40, 5:25, 7:20, 9. Never Been Kissed* 7:15 (Fri. only). Forces of Nature 12:05, 2:30, 5, 7:25, 9:40. The King and I 12:10, 2:20, 4:30, 7. True Crime 12:40, 3:30, 6:40, 9:30. Ed TV 1, 4, 6:50, 9:35. Cruel Intentions 12:25, 2:50, 5:10, 7:25, 9:55. Analyze This 12:15, 2:40, 4:55, .7:20,9:50. The Other Sister 9:20. Deep End of the Ocean 12:50, 3:50, 6:45, 9:25. Wing Commander 12:20, 2:35, 4:50. The Corrupter 7:15 (not Fri.), 9:45. All shows daily.

College Street, Burlington, 863-9515. Tango* 1:30, 4:10, 7:20, 10. Ed TV 1:40, 4:20, 7:10, 9:50. Elizabeth 6:30, 9:20. True Crime 1, 3:40, 6:50, 9:30. The King and I 12:50, 2:40, 4:30. Shakespeare in Love 1:20, 4, 7, 9:40. Life is Beautiful 1:10, 3:50, 6:40, 9:10. All shows daily.

THE SAVOY Main Street, Montpelier, 229-0509. Waking Ned Devine 1:30 (Sat-Sun), 6:30, 8:30. Green Mountain Film Festival March 26 - April 1 (see schedule this issue)

CAPITOL THEATRE 93 State Street, Montpelier, 229-0343.

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SHOWCASE CINEMAS 5 Williston Road, S. Burlington, 863-4494. Doug's First Movie* 1, 3:15, 5, 6:50, 9:15. The Mod Squad* 1:10, 3:40, 7:10, 9:40. Ravenous 6:40, 9:25. My Favorite Martian 12:40, 3:30. Analyze This 12:50, 3:50, 7, 9:35. Baby Geniuses 12:30, 2:45, 4:50, 7:15, 9:30. All shows Sat-Mon, Eves only Tues-Fri.

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388 Pine Street, Burlington. Next to the Cheese Outlet M o n d a y - S a tu r d a y 10-6, S u n d a y 12-5

page 3 4

SEVEN DAYS

march 24, 1999

weekly

listings

on w w w . s e v e n d a y s v t . c o m

cinemas

FiLMQuIZ

cosponsored by Video World Superstore

Claire Danes, Giovanni Ribisi and Omar Epps play Julie, Pete and Line ’90s-style in Scott Silver’s who-cares update of the ’70s series. (R) DOUG’S FIR ST M O V IE He’s the hardest working ’toon in show business. His popular half-hour show appears on^both The Nickelodeon Channel and ABC. Now he makes the leap to the big screen with this full-length feature from director Maurice Joyce. Featuring the vocal stylings of Billy West and Fred" Newman. (G) TANGO Spanish filmmaker Carlos Saura’s cinematic meditation on THE M O D SQ U A D

middle age has been compared to Fellini’s 8 H2. (PG-13) • N EV ER BEEN K IS S E D Drew Barrymore stars here as a Chicago magazine writer who researches a piece on today’s youth by going undercover and attending high school. And Raja Gosnell directs. David Arquette co-stars. (PG-13)

on video Shouldn’t there be a statute of limitations on sequels? First, there was The Odd Couple II. Then the long-unawaited Halloween H2 O. And now this, a fourth installment in the dor B R ID E OF C H U C K Y * *

mant, dead as a doornail Child’s Play series. This time around the homicidal doll toys with Jennifer Tilly.

THE DEEP END OF THE

Ulu {Georgia) Grosbard directs and Michelle Pfeiffer stars in this big-screen ver sion of Jacquelyn Mitchard’s Oprah-sanctioned novel about a woman who misplaces her child in a crowded hotel lobby. Treat Williams and Whoopi Goldberg co-star. (PG-13) , , O C E A N * * 172

R A V E N O U S * * 172

L.A. Confidentials Guy Pearce and Trainspottings Robert Carlyle star in this darkly comic saga o f canni balism on the prairie. (R) FORCES OF N A T U R E * * 172 Uhoh, Sandra Bullock Alert! The bubbly flop magnet tries to drag Ben Affleck down with her this time, as the two make an unlikely love connection in this romantic comedy conceived by executives at Dreamworks. Bronwen Hughes directs. (PG-13) THE K ING AN D I * * 172 Miranda Richardson and Martin Vidnovic lend their voices to Richard {The Fox and the Hound) Rich’s animat ed version of the 1951 musical. (G) THE C O R R U P T O R * * * Mark Wahlberg and Chow Yun-Fat play New York cops caught in the crossfire of an Asian gang war in this Oliver Stone production. (R) BA B Y G E N IU S E S * * Kathleen Turner returns to the screen in this comedy about an evil scientist who tries to create a super race of toddler smartypants. Christopher Lloyd and Dom DeLuise co-star. Bob Clark directs. (PG) W IN G C O M M A N D E R * * Freddie Prinze Jr. leads a cast of twentysomethings in an attack on aliens who, as per usual, want to take over the world. Based on the popular computer game series. (PG-13) E D T V * * * Surprisingly enough, Ron Howards new real life-as-TV comedy isn’t based on The Truman Show, but rather an obscure 1994 Canadian picture called Louis XIX: King o f the Airwaves. Not that it matters,

LIFE IS B E A U T IF U L * * * * *

Roberto Benigni’s Holocaust com edy took the Grand Jury Prize at this years Cannes festival. In addition to directing and co-writ ing, he also stars as an ItalianJewish father who tries to shield his son from the truth about con centration camps by pretending the whole thing’s an elaborate

ly thing — me, my brothers, my cousins, we all have

M IG H T Y JOE Y O U N G * * 172

Disney’s latest live-action release offers a digitally enhanced update of a little-seen 1949 film about a giant misunderstood ape. Hmmm, sounds mighty familiar. Bill Paxton and Charlize Theron star. (PG) P L E A S A N T V IL L E *** Two presentday teens find themselves trapped in an old black-and-white family sitcom in the directorial debut from Gary Ross. With Tobey Maguire, Reese Witherspoon and William H. Macy. (PG-13)

nearly 3 0 years. These girls, they’re real spitfires, too, regu

= not review^

since everyone on Earth is going to compare it to Peter Weir’s movie, anyway. Matthew McConaughey stars in the role of Tru... I mean Ed. C RU EL IN T E N T IO N S * * 172 This isn’t the first time Les Liaisons Dangereuses has been brought to the big screen, but first-time director Roger Kumble has come up with something o f a first any way: He’s set the classic tale of lust and manipulation in a mod ern high school. Ryan Phillippe, Sarah Michelle Gellar and Reese Witherspoon star. (R) ANALYZE T H I S * * * 172 Harold Ramis has a knack for memo rable, smarter-than-average come dies, and this looks like it might make his hit list one longer. Billy Crystal plays a suburban shrink. Robert De Niro co-stars as his newest patient, a powerful mob boss. With Lisa Kudrow. (R) THE OTHER S IS T E R * * 172 Juliette Lewis co-stars with Giovanni Ribisi in the story o f a mentally handicapped woman grappling with the challenges of modern workplace. Ron Livingston and Jennifer Aniston. (PG-13) M Y FAVORITE M A R T IA N * * Don’t expect this to be your favorite TVto-big-screen update. Disney’s the atrical adaptation of the popular ’60s show has been sitting on the shelf for eons. Christopher Lloyd and Jeff Daniels star. (PG) S H A K E S P E A R E IN L O V E * * * John {Mrs. Brown) Madden directs this wisely praised look at what the early years o f the bard’s career and love life might have been like. Joseph Fiennes and Gwyneth Paltrow star. (R)

daughters and one son. Jack is his name. It’s a fam i

daughters. Jack is the first male child born to my fam ily in

shorts rating scal e:__ . *****

y baby boy was born yesterday. That makes seven

contest with great prizes. (PG-13) Lost interest in the sport of basketball altogether? You might want to give this saga of life and love on the gridiron a try. James Van Der Beek stars. (R) PATCH A D A M S * 172 Robin Williams has bucked the system just to spread a litde laughter {GoodMorning, Vietnam) and practiced medicine without a thought to traditional limitations {Awakenings). If you liked those movies, you should love this one, in which he does both. Based on the story of the real-life doctor, Patch Adams. (PG-13) A BU G ’S L IF E * * * * Antz may have made it to the theaters first, but everything I’ve seen indicates Pixar’s clever computer-driven comedy will have no trouble com mitting insecticide at the box office. Featuring the voices of Dave Foley, Kevin Spacey and David Hyde Pierce. (G)

lar forces of nature. They can drive me a little bananas some times, to be honest. Ernie at work thinks they’re strange, but I tell him lots of little girls play taps on their trumpets when their baby brother comes home from the hospital. I’m sure plenty of them think that public-access program about Satan is just the greatest show on earth. Though I could live without the pentagrams they keep painting on the kitchen floor. Kids w ill be kids. Don’t laugh — it could happen to you.

title search Welcome to the version of our game in which you get to catch up on your reading. While you’re savoring the paragraphs above, keep an eye open for the titles of 10 motion pictures which we’ve woven into the literature.

V A R S IT Y B L U E S * * * 172

THE P R IN C E OF E G Y P T * * 172

The first traditionally animated release from DreamWorks studios tells the epic Old Testament story of Moses and features the voices of Val Kilmer, Sandra Bullock and Martin Short, among others, along with songs courtesy of Pocahontas composer Stephen Schwartz. (PG) YOU ’V E GOT M A IL * * 172 Look for lots of Sleepless in Seattle fans to wait on line for tickets to this Tom Hanks-Meg Ryan reunion from the very same screenwriter. The two fall for one another in an Internet chat room while oblivi ous to the fact that they are busi ness rivals in the non-virtual world. Greg Kinnear co-stars. Nora Ephron directs. (PG) OCTOBER S K Y * * * The true story of an underprivileged boy who rises above his lowly lot to realize his dream of a place in the space program. Jake Gyllenhaal and Laura Dern star. Joe Johnston directs. (PG)

o e e o ©____

For more film fun don't forget to watch "A rt Patrol" every Thursday and Friday on News Channel 51

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SEVEN DAYS

page 35

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deadline: monday, 5 pm • phone 8 0 2 .8 6 4 .5 6 8 4 • fax 8 0 2 .8 6 5 .1 0 1 5 L IN E ADS: 2 5 words for $ 7 . Over 2 5 words: 3 0 0 a word. Longer running ads are discounted. Ads m ust be p repaid. D ISPLA Y ADS: $ 1 3 per col. inch. Group buys for em p lo ym en t display ads are available w ith th e Addison In d ep en d en t, the S t. Albans Messenger, th e M ilto n In d ep e n d en t and th e Essex R eporter. Call for more d etails. VIS A and M A S TER C A R D accepted. And cash, of course.

EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT VERM ONT TEDDY BEAR CO. W ANTS TO HELP YOU START M AKING YOUR SUM M ER M ONEY

NOW! BEAR COUNSELORS now for the Mother’s Day holiday with continuing employment opportunities through the summer in our retail store. Make $7.50 to start in Phone Sales. $$ incentives, store discount, relaxed atmos phere and a great product to sell if you have basic computer, spelling, gram mar and customer service skills. Full- and part-time positions, day and evening hours available if you apply now. Qualified employees can join the retail store team after the holiday with continued employment through the summer and fall entertaining our guests with informative tours through the factory and assisting their purchases in the store. Full- and part-time day time positions available, seven days a week. BEAR DRESSERS are also needed full-time days to dress bears for shipment for the Mother’s Day holiday. $6.50/hour with possible overtime and weekend work. Attention to detail and quality essential along with the ability to work in a sometimes hectic, fast-paced environment.

BROCHURE, MAGAZINE & poster distributor for estab lished local business. Full-time & part-time. Weekdays. Auto required for some routes. Hourly pay. 862-4366. DANCERS/MODELS: Sign-on bonus. Will train. Great pay. Fun. 2 clubs and private work. Call 244-5457. DRIVERS WANTED: Cash daily. Make own schedule. Dependable car a must. Menus On The Move, 863-0469.

Peace & Justice Store Seeks c<Ht)3«ager. s-syr.

Come in to the store and fill out an application. We are located 1/4 of a mile south of the Shelburne Museum on Route 7. You may also fax your resume to us at (802)985-1304.

E x e c u tiv e D ire c to r C h a ffe e A rt C e n te r The Chaffee Center for the Visual Arts, a private, non profit community arts center with an active arts educa tion program, seeks a highly motivated, creative and energetic individual as director. A high priority exists for someone with strong organizational and financial man agement skills who will continue to implement the staff’s team-approach model for decision making. Knowledge of effective art presentation in a gallery con text and an interest in the maintenance and restoration of our important historic building are significant responsibilities in this position. Ability to network at a local and state level with other arts organizations is desired. The ideal candidate will genuinely enjoy the challenges in this diverse position and the opportunity to develop a strong relationship with individuals in the community and Chaffee’s statewide artist membership. Please forward, letter o f interest, resume jg c h a f f e e and three references by April 5th to:■ 1§ H I J P Search Committee, Chaffee Center for the % Visual Arts, 16 South Main St., Rutland, __• Vermont 05701.

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D ear Tom a n d Ray, I'd like to know something about turbochargers on cars. Specifically, w hat is a tur bochargerr W hat does i t do a n d how does it do it? Finally, is it. an asset or a liability on a used cart? — Peter RAY: G ood questions, Peter. A turbocharger is known in the parts department as a "3BP." That’s "triple boat payment," because it usually costs well over $ 1 ,0 0 0 to replace. TO M : A turbocharger is basi cally a high-speed fan driven by the car's ow n exhaust pres

FOLLETT COLLEGE STORES, operators of over 585 college bookstores have the following opportunities at out Trinity College Bookstore: Asst. Store Manager. You’ll be responsible for customer service, opening/closing the store, cash handling & other store duties in our small store. Supervisory exp. in a retail environment a plus. Ability to balance m ulti ple tasks necessary. Full bene fits available first day of work. Sales Associate (part-time). We are looking for an experienced customer service-oriented sales associate for our small store. Cash handling exp. a plus. P/T hours, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Please apply in person to Trinity College Bookstore, McAuley Hall, 208 Colchester St., Burlington. Visit us on the web at www.fcs.follett.com. EOE.

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1-888 4DRINKS O n ly $150.00 ♦ ♦ ♦

Training & Manuals Certification Job Placement!

smaller engine would be just fine? TOM : And, the theory goes, to add that extra surge o f power when you really need it, you call on the turbocharger. RAY: The problem in reality is that the people who buy tur bocharged cars tend to be testosterone-poisoned males . who have the turbo working all day long. And that's hard on a) the turbo, and b) the rest o f the car. TO M : Also, most cars with turbos tell you to let the engine idle for 30 seconds before you shut it off. And most turbo owners do this for the first week or so they own the car and then forget about it. That idling time allows the oil to cool o ff the turbocharg er. If the turbo doesn't cool off, oil can eventually dry out up there and restrict the pas sageways. That leads to turbo failure, and the aforemen tioned 3BP.

FREELANCE GRAPHIC DESIGNER for small design studio. Should have strong cre ative abilities, and production experience with Quark, Photoshop and Illustrator. Exciting projects, downtown location, flexible hours, com petitive compensation. Call Seek Design, Inc. 865-5015. GRAPHIC DESIGNER for a unique Stowe studio: creative, detail-oriented, Mac-sawy, full-time person to work w/ great clients. Resume/letter to: S.S.D., 99 South Hollow Rd., Stowe, VT 05672.

DELIVERY DRIVERS WANTED Full- & Part-time Earn $7-$io/hr. Need own vehicle & insurance Flexible hours

GREEN MTN. AUDUBON SUMMER DAY CAMP staff & internship available. Plan, Organize and Teach environ mental education to children in an outdoor setting. Call 434-3068 for info. MAINTENANCE STAFF: April— October, 40 hrs./wk. Crew Member? Energetic per son for outdoor maintenance & trail work. Apply Mon.-Thurs., 10-3 by 4/2 at the Winooski Valley Park District, Ethan Allen Homestead, Burlington. MAN UFACTU RING/WAR EHOUSE: Disassemble/reassemble toner cartridges, shipping, receiving, stocking shelves. Must have good mechanical skills, fast learner. Good pay/benefits. Send resume to: P.O. Box 878, Williston, VT 05495.

SEVEN DAYS 864.5684

Apply in person to 4 -Star Delivery, 203 N. W inooski Ave., Burlington

865-3663

Flynn Theatre

C u s t o m e r S e r v ic e S u p e r v is o r , B o x O ffic e Full-time professional position with some evening hours and weekends in rota tion. Hire, train and supervise sales staff for phone, mail order and win dow ticket sales. Outstanding cus tomer service skills, computer literacy and previous supervisory experience in retail or phone sales required. Competitive salary and excellent benefits. EOE. Send resume and cover letter to: Flynn Theatre, Human Resources 153 Main Street, Bulington, VT 05401

RAY: So since turbos are rarely used judiciously or properly, we caution against buying one in a used car. O f course, if you find a Mitsubishi 3000G T Turbo for sale by a little old lady, you can take a chance on it. But even then, I'd be w ill ing to bet she's known around the nursing home as Grandma Leadfoot. Order Tom an d Rays best selling pamphlet, "Ten Ways You M ay Be Ruinning Your Car W ithout Even Knowing It!” You’re probably doing a t least one o f them! Send $3 an d a stamped (55 cents), selfaddressed, No. 10 envelope to Ruin, P.O. Box 6420, Riverton, N J 08077-6420.

Seeking...

GENEROUS SPIRITED PEOPLE to provide short-term shelter for adolescents in Washington County through the Youth Service Bureau's Shelter Program. Stipend... voluntary placements... flexib ility... Please call Georgiana, 229-9151 for more information.

Got a question about cars? Write to Click an d Clack in care o f this newspaper, or email them by visiting the Car Talk section ofcars.com on the World Wide Web. .

please note: refunds cannot be granted for any reason, adjustments will be credited to the advertiser’s account toward future classifieds placement only, we proofread carefully, but even so, mistakes can occur, report errors at once, as seven days will not be responsible for errors continuing beyond the first printing, adjustment for error is limited to republication, in any event, liability for errors (or omissions) shall not exceed the cost of the space occupied by such an error (or omission)', all advertising is subject to review by seven days, seven days reserves the right to .edit, properly categorize or decline any ad without comment or appeal. -X y .

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SEVEN DA*/< YS

march 24, 1999 v.' k

-mar.

7D Classifieds • 864.5684 EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT VOLUNTEERS AUTOMOTIVE OFFICE/ APT./HOUSE BUS/STUDIO FOR RENT SPACE MUSEUM INTREPRETERS: Shelburne Museum seeks indi viduals with interest or back ground in American history and/or art for 1999 season: May 22-October 24. Seeking team-oriented and motivated individuals with strong com munication skills and the abili ty to work effectively with the public, school groups, and co workers. Extensive training in art and history begins early May. $5.25/hr. Call 985-3348 ext. 3368 to receive applica tion and job description. Completed applications due by April 7.

OFFICE HELP: phones, files, orders, sales calls. Part-time. Flexible hours/days. Send resume to: P.O. Box 868 , Williston, VT 05495. ON-LINE MANAGER: Junior position at leading interactive agency. Help manage the mar keting of on-line stores (Urbanwhere.com, Gurlwear.com) and a wide range of agency business. Resumes to Shark Interactive, 209 Battery St., Burlington, VT 05401. www.sharkcomm.com. PROFESSOR/TUTOR/RETIRED EXECUTIVE: 3x a week for UVM Bus. student. Salary depends on credentials. Call 908-377-4778 or fax resume, 973-377-2090. SHELBURNE FARMS DAY CAMP COUNSELOR POSI TIONS: Water-safety instructor & counselor to provide art activities. Part-time & full-time available. 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., June 28-Aug. 6 . Really fun experience in beautiful setting! Call Barb Ellis, 878-1503, or Margaret Munt, 878-4590.

TELE-PROFESSIONALS: RVS, a technology marketing compa ny, is looking for a few talent ed phone pros to work on a variety of projects. If you can meet the challenge, have some computer experience, like a relaxed, fun and exciting atmosphere, call David Brown, 872-8130.

TUTOR NEEDED TO ASSIST adult learner with basic math, technical math, and help pre pare him for ham radio license exam. Short-term. $10/hr. Contact Marlene Williamson, 658-3323. $800 WEEKLY POTENTIAL Processing Government Refunds At Home! No Experience Necessary. 1-800696-4779 Ext. 1394.

PUBLIC ACCESS TV SHOW with paranormal theme seeks volunteers for production staff. Experience helpful, but enthu siasm and reliability a must. Call 862-7609.

’88 SUBARU GL WAGON, 4WD, dark maroon, meticu lously maintained, lots of new parts. Comes with Yakima rack. $2,500 o.b.o. 518891-6046.

RESEARCH VOLUNTEERS

'95 VW JETTA, green w/ sun roof & 75K miles (mostly high way) in great condition! Brand new exhaust & snow tires. $9,500 o.b.o. Eve, 864-5684 or 496-6659.

UVM RESEARCH STUDY: Marijuana users, non-users & former users, 18+, needed for 2 hrs. for research study on memory, thinking and atten tion. $25 compensation. Call 656-9570, M-F, 12:30-1:30 p.m. or M-Th, 3-7 p.m.

BUY CARS! FROM $500. Upcoming seizure/surplus sales. Sport, luxury & economy cars. For current listings call 1-800-311-5048 ext. 1738. SEIZED CARS FROM $500. Sport, luxury & economy cars, trucks, 4x4s, utility and more. For current listings call 1-800311-5048 ext. 2239.

BUSINESS OPP.

WE’RE LOOKING FOR AN ambitious entrepreneur or cou ple to get started in a homebased business representing the leading manufacturer of high-tech air and water puri fiers. Will train you every step. Full- or part-time. Call CRISP AIR, 244-8344, or fax 244-8567.

You bet she's : through SEVEN DAYS

MIDDLEBURY: Middlebury Holistic Health Center has bright offices & classroom/ group room space available. Flexible options, including one-day-a-week rentals for offices & single-use rentals for the group room. Meditation groups, yoga teachers & others wanted. The group room is suitable for meetings, lectures, classes & more. 388-4800.

MIDDLEBURY/BURL./SO. BURL, to BARRE: I am looking to share driving to work. Willing to meet half-way, preferrably on Rte. 7. Hours are 8 to 5, M-F. (3057)

BUSINESS PARTNER NEED ED for new grooming salon. Must be an experienced pro fessional dog groomer. Call 802-660-9970. PERFECT PART-TIME HOME BUSINESS! 2 hours a day earns you financial freedom. 1998 People’s Choice Award Winner. Free 24-hr. message. 1-888-574-6615.

BURLINGTON: Office available in historic building. Prime downtown location. Parking. Warehouse and shipping avail able on premises. $500/mo. Call 862-0933.

RICHMOND to ESSEX JUNC TION: I am looking for a ride to work M-F, generally 9 to 5, but can be very flexible. (3059) LINCOLN/BRISTOL to SO. BURLINGTON: I’m looking to share driving 4 days/wk. My hours are 8:30 to 5 p.m. (3126)

BURLINGTON to WINOOSKI: I am looking for a ride one way to work, M-F. I have to be in by 7 a.m. (3070)

JOHNSON to BURLINGTON: I am a student looking for a ride to school M-F, 8 to 4. I really need a ride TO school, I could arrange for a ride home if neces sary. (3102)

SO. BURLINGTON to TAFTS CORNERS: I am looking for a ride to work, M-F, for a few months. My hours are 9 to 5. (3068)

SO. BURLINGTON to IBM: I am looking for a ride to work, I am on the 7 a.m. to 7 p.m. shift with rotating days. (3090) MILTON to COLCHESTER: I am looking for a ride to work. I could meet at the Chimney Corners Park & Ride. My hours are 11 a.m. to 7 p.m., Tues.Sat. with some flexibility. (3095) ESSEX JCT./BURL. to ST. ALBANS: I am looking for a ride to work. My hours are 6 a.m. to 5 p.m., M-F with flexible evening hours. (3088) BURLINGTON to MONTPELIER: I am looking for a ride to the National Life Building. My hours are 8 to 5, M-F. (3072)

STOWE to ESSEX JCT.: I work in the Outlet Fair area and am looking for a ride. My schedule is very flexible and includes weekends. (3077) BURLINGTON to BRISTOL: I am looking for a ride to work. My hours are 7 to 4, M-F. (3067) SO. BURLINGTON to MONTPE LIER: I am looking to share dri ving with someone. I work M, Tu, W, F, 8:30 to 4:30. I would be willing to meet at the Richmond P&R. (3050) BURLINGTON to MONKTON: I am looking for a ride to work for a few weeks. My hours are 7:30 to 4:00, M-F with some flexibili ty. (3063)

UNDERHILL to BURLINGTON: am looking for a ride to work MF, 8:30 to 5. (3055) BARRE to BURLINGTON. I am a student looking for a ride M,W,F, 8 a.m. Flex, return. (3051) HINESBURG to BURLINGTON. I am looking for a ride to the UMall M-F, 9:30 a.m. (3040) GRAND ISLE to BURLINGTON. I’m looking to share driving on a smoke-free commute to work. Hours are M-F, 9 to 6 , some flex. (3038) SO. BURLINGTON to MILTON. I am working on a house in Milton for a month and seeking a ride to the site M-F at 7 a.m. (3036) MIDDLEBURY to BURLINGTON. I’m a working student looking for a ride Tues. or Weds, to Burl./ returning Fri. or Sat. eve to Middlebury. (3035) MORRISVILLE to WILLISTON. I’m looking to share driving on my trek to work. Hours are M-F, 8 to 4:30. (2997)

BURLINGTON: South End, 2.5-bdrm., hdwd. firs., lots of windows, old home w/ charm. No smokers/dogs, W/D, offstreet parking. $750/mo. + utils. + dep. Refs. & lease. Avail. 4/1. 862-4921. BURLINGTON: Clean 2-bdrm „ 1950s style apt. near UVM— W/D, new gas water/heat. No smoking, no pets. $650/mo. + utils. Avail. 6/1. 658-2578.

BURLINGTON to WILLISTON. I am currently earless and looking for a ride to work M-F. My hours are 8:30 to 4:30. (3031) SWANTON to ST. ALBANS. I am a late sleeper looking for a ride to work at noon. I work M-F, noon to 7 p.m. or later. (3033) BURLINGTON to SO. BURLING TON. I am a recent arrival to town iooking for a ride to work M-F, 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. (3028) BURLINGTON to COLCHESTER. I am a teachers’ aide looking for a ride to Colchester. My hours are 8 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. (3026) BURLINGTON to SUGARBUSH. I’m a ski bum, working at Sugarbush, looking to share dri ving to/from the mountain. Hours are 8 to 4, varying days. (3022) WINOOSKI to ESSEX JCT.: I am looking for a ride to IBM. I work 7 p.m. to 7:30 a.m., schedule varies. (3024) BURLINGTON to U-MALL. I am being relocated to the mall and am seeking ride M-F/S, 9 to 6 . (2992)

Vermont^

P id e s h a r e

millllTfMMWIIMiMlllliUTI

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ILLUSTRATION: SLUG SIGNORINO

Straight

D ear Cecil, Where d id the words abracadabra, hocus-pocus, and presto come from ? H ow d id they become associated w ith magic? — M atthew Mitchell, via the Internet

Age-old process. Years ago, when trying to invoke the mysterious forces o f the universe, you said, “Abracadabra.” Today you say, “I think we need to call tech support.” Hocus-pocus has been around since the early 17th century. The Oxford English Dictionary tells o f a cer tain conjurer called Hocus-Pocus who used the phrase as part o f a faux-Latin incantation during his act: Hocus pocus, tontus talontus, vade celeriter jubeo. It’s been plausibly suggested that hocus-pocus is a corrup tion o f the genuine Latin words hoc est enim corpus meum, “for this is m y body,” spoken during the con secration o f the Roman Catholic Mass when the wine and wafer are said to be transformed into the body and blood o f Christ. Some experts think hocus-pocus itself was corrupted into the word hoax. O ne pre sumes these experts were non-Catholic. Abracadabra is a much older term, turning up first in a second-century poem. It was used by the Gnostics, early Christians who placed great stock in esoteric knowledge. The term has been explained as (1) a com bination o f the Hebrew words ab (“father”), ben (“son”), and ruach acadosch (“holy spirit”); (2) a derivation o f the name o f one Gnostic leader, Abrasax; or (3) a derivation o f Abraxas, a Gnostic word for God, “the source o f 365 emanations.” Allegedly the Greek letters for Abraxas add up to 365 when translated according to numerological princi ples. If you wrote abracadabra on a parchment in a triangular arrangement — A B R A C A D A B R A ABRACADABR ABRACADAB

— etc., and hung it around your neck, you’d suppos edly be cured o f the ague (fever). T he Sudafed o f the day, I guess — and probably worked about as well. Presto, Italian for “quickly,” has been used by con jurers for centuries to com m and the unseen demons. A possibly related term is prestidigitation, or sleight o f hand, which is probably derived from the Latin words for “quick fingers.” Sounds a lot like what pickpock ets do, and if you’ve ever seen one o f those three-cardm onte guys do his thing, you know the result, as far as your wallet is concerned, is about the same. A SAD DAY FO R T H E N A T IO N O n March 31, America O nline will be pulling the plug on the Straight D ope site. I f I were you, I’d sell short. But don’t worry about us — we’ll be m oving our on-line resources to our World W ide Web site at www.straightdope.com. T he archive and message boards should have made the trip by the tim e you read this; com e see for yourself. O ne important change: I’ll be personally fielding message-board queries about m y recent colum ns. This has required me to overcome m y long-standing (and reasonable) loathing o f the computer, that toy o f the devil. But I’ve been taking far too m uch lip from the Teeming M illions, and it’s time to give those guys what for. Meanwhile, we’re planning som e farewell activities on our AO L site. For details, check out keyword: Straight D o p e .. .while you can. — CECIL A D A M S

Is there something you need to get straight? Cecil Adams can deliver the Straight Dope on any topic. Write Cecil Adams at the Chicago Reader, 11 E. Illinois, Chicago, IL 60611, or e-mail him at cecil@chireader.com.

march 2 4 ,1 9 9 9 ”•

SEVEN .

DAYS

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ROOM FOR RENT

RED MEAT

BURLINGTON: Furnished, newly renovated, convenient, clean, quiet, parking, private entrance/phone, shared kitch./bath. No smoking/ pets. $400/mo. incl. all. 862-3341.

Tell me the truth, Ted...do you think my head has gotten larger over the past year?

HOUSEMATES WANTED

fr o m th e s e c re t file s o f

red carpet rug burn

Max- cannon

It’s a genetic trait in my family...we also get bad facial veins. Mostly though, I don’t relish the thought of being covered with purplish boils like both my father and grandfather. I have a few already...would you like to see?

I think I’ll just wait for the National Geographic special when it comes out on PBS, if that’s okay with you.

BURLINGTON: Seeking 4th prof./grad for house on Winooski River. Eco-friendly, 2 dogs/2 cats; no more. Gardens W/D, bus line. $316.67/mo. + 1/4 utils. 862-7362. BURLINGTON: Music lover, laid-back individual sought for 3-bdrm. apt. in Old North End. 2 male roommates, early 30s, male or female welcome. $220/mo. + utils. Mike or Tim, 865-2597. BURLINGTON: Want to put some good energy into a healthy roommate situation? Live with me: (here's the scoop) by UVM, only $300/mo. + utils., complete amenities. Call Todd, 660-1911. BURLINGTON: Seeking prof ./grad student to share 2 bdrm. on quiet street close to downtown. Large bdrm., back porch, yard, parking. $300/mo. + 1/2 utils. Avail 2/1. 864-1693. COLCHESTER: Prof./grad stu dent, non-smoker, to share 2 bdrm. apt. Basement, laundry, parking. No pets. Avail. 4/1. $250/mo. + 1/2 utils. 655-1523.

•/ r

DATING

ALICE’S GARDENS: Quality perennial garden planting, maintenance and design. 660-2019.

CHILDCARE RELIABLE, TRUSTWORTHY college student seeking parttime childcare position. Exc. refs., childcare exp., has own transportation. 654-5813.

HOUSE SITTING 49 year-old single, prof, male looking for housesitting situa tion in greater Burlington, May 1. Responsible and many ref erences upon request. Call Bob, 865-6179.

SERVICES ARCHANGEL PRINTS: Personalized design/printing for business cards, brochures, newsletters, posters, CD cov ers, invitations, menus, etc. Just the way you want! Editing services also available. 482-6095. CASH: Have you sold property and taken back a mortgage? I’ll pay cash for all your remaining payments. (802) 775-2552 x202.

COMPATIBLES: Singles meet by being in the same place as other singles. We’ve made this the best time to connect you. Call for details, 863-4308. www.compatibles.com. N.E. SINGLES CONNECTION: Dating and Friendship Network for relationship minded Single Adults. Professional, Intel ligent, Personal. Lifetime membership. Newsletter For FREE info, 1-800-775-3090.

TUTORING

CLEANING SERVICES

MATH, ENGLISH, WRITING, Science, Humanities, Proof reading, from elementary to graduate level. Test Prep for GRE, LSAT, GMAT, SAT-I, SATii, i Michael Kraemer, 862-4042.

female look£r neat ^ d q > ^ x ^ p t:J b e« % -^ ', parking, must like dogs. $"400/mo. + dep. & reft, pre ferred. Call 878-0627.

7 i—

HOME & GARDEN

housekeeper to the stars?" “ Yes. Dial 658-7458... Now was that so hard?” “ Oh, behave...”

HOMEBREW MAKE GREAT BEER AT HOME foF only 500/bottle. Brew what you want when you want! Start-up kits & prize-winning recipes. Gift certifs. are a great gift. VT Homebrew Supply, Rt. 15, Winooski. 655-2070.

S t o g y A U d u te Q c -u y "Total

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Speaking of which, I have a keratotic lesion on my groin that’s shaped like Madagascar.

BUY THIS STUFF GOING OUT OF BUSINESS SALE: Forgotten Furnishings Antiques, Rte. 100, Waitsfield, 496-9744. Through March 31. Bureaus, tables, cupboards, chairs, dressers, lamps, books, china, glass, etc.

WOLFF TANNING BEDS TAN AT HOME BUY DIRECT & SAVE! COMMERCIAL/HOME UNITS FROM $199 LOW MONTHLY PAYMENTS FREE COLOR CATALOG

CALL TODAY 1-800-711-0158

ADULT TALK WITH LIVE HOT BEAU TIFUL GIRLS!! No w a it in g ^ |T Immediate 1-on-l connectfonlf 24 hrs!! 1-900-787-9526 ext. 9202. $3.99/min. Must be 18 yrs. Serv-U (619) 645-8434.

NASTY GIRLS!!! "fJif 9 9 ‘ 1-800-458-6444 1-900-435-4405

MUSIC

16-TRACK ANALOG RECORD ING STUDIO. Dogs, Cats & Clocks Productions. Warm, friendly, prof, environment. Services for: singer/ songwrit ers, jingles, bands. Reasonable rates. Call Robin, 658-1042.

GREEN MOUNTAIN SAVO YARDS seeking voices, espe cially lyric tenors, to perform Gilbert & Sullivan selections. Call 860-1102. Also needed: pianist to accompany.

ELECTRIC BASS PLAYER look ing for a drummer and gui tarist to start funk/jazz/groove outfit. Joe, 877-2710. WANTED: REGGAE DRUM MER. Please call Peter, 865-3070. WHERE HAVE ALL THE HEAVY hitters gone? The band Spill needs drummer. You.prof., committed, sober w/ transportation. Us: modern hard rock, 2 CDs w/ 3rd in the works, mgt., busy summer and fall tour. 660-7099 or spillll94@ aol.com . THE KENNEL REHEARSAL SPACE— for bands and musi cians— currently offers monthly rentals for individuals or shared rooms w/ 24-hr. access. For more info call 660-2880. 3017 Williston Rd., So. Burlington.

DRUMMER AVAILABLE WHO sings for blues/funk. Only working situations. 372-469Q. SETH YACAVONE BLUES BAND seeks versatile drum mer. Flexible work schedule req. Must like groove to blues, funk & weirdness. Improv. skills a must. No fame & for tune seekers. Call 888-5958. LOOKING FOR M I’m putting tog band, like earl more danceabi^ji

make call. Craig, 660-8209. GOD’S BAND: All faiths, all ^ genders, all visions. Are you ready for the next millennium? 372-4690. ', ' * *

r™n‘ 18+

SHE WAS LEFT WITH HALF o F l M o S T oF HER SETTLEMENT HlS WORTH ANP A PESiRE FoR I eNPEP UP IN THE CoFFERS oF REVEN6 E. I TOTAL MAKE OVER/ INC.

SHE CAME OUT L00K1N6 YEARS Y0UN6 ER, SToNES LIGHTER, ANP WAY PRETTIER.

Afreg 22 VEAP5 OF MAgRiA&e He p fw p p e p Hep F l a t .

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L A Y Q WAYLAY- COM

IN FACT No oNE RECoSNlZEP HER— NOT EVEN oLP FKlENPS.

...SHE COULP BREAK HIM LIKE HE HAP BROKEN HER.

INTERNET SECRETS! Learn how to do things with your Internet connection that you never thought possible! Call 1900-740-1119 ext. 3264. $2.99 per min. Must be 18 yrs. Serv-U, 619-645-8434.

SERVICES TELEPHONE JACK INSTALLATIONS/REPAIRS: Quality work, very professional & very afford able. Will install jacks for modems, multiple lines & extensions to anywhere in house/apt. Repair jacks also. FREE ESTIMATES. Call 86 34873 for an appointment. 5M&Y

UER

HER

CHARMS WORKEP WELL. I Fo^tAER HUSBANP FELL ■ FOR HER AGAIN. I

■ WHEN SHE LEFT, IT WAS WITH I A NoTE THAT LET HIM PoWN I GENTLY.

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LEGALS

M U S IC WOMEN MUSICIANS TAKE NOTE! Original, funky girlgroup, S.W.A.Y., currently audi tioning horn section, keys, gui tar. Vocals & dance ability a plus. 454-9339. ADDS UP TO THE FATTEST SOUND in the Gm. Mtns.: A highly prof, bassist/producer ready to bring out your best from behind a Panasonic WRDA7 digital console + ProTools/24 MIX (64 fully automated tracks of 24-bit digital audio) + best digital processing avail. (TC/Electronics, Focusrite, Lexicon, Apogee, Drawmer, Waves) + finest studio musicians in New England = MetaMedia™ Studios, 802-496-3520. COMPOSER/ARRANGER/PRODUCER w/ a lifetime of musi cal exp. seeks all types of musical projects. Contact Roger at Question Mark Records, 802-363-1867. MAX MIX DJ/RECORD SHOP, 108 Church St., Burlington, looking for used DJ/music equipment, record collections and local clothing designers. Merchandise placed on con signment. 802-651-0722. AD ASTRA RECORDING. Relax. Record. Get the tracks. Make a demo. Make a record. Quality is high. Rates are low. State of the art equip. & deck w/ great views. 872-8583.

THROBULATE!

Telephone: (802) 864-6565. Marcia S. Merrill, CPA. CITY OF BURLINGTON TRAFFIC REGULATIONS The following items are hereby enacted by the Public Works Commission as amendments to the City of Burlington’s Code of ordinances, Appendix C, Traffic Regulations. Sec. 10. Two-Hour Parking. No person shall park any vehi cle longer than two (2) hours, between the hours of 8:00 a.m. and 6:00 p.m., Sundays and holidays excepted, in the following locations: (12) On the east side of South Champlain Street from the northern most edge of the drive way accessing the Bobbin Mill Apartments on the south [to the existing thirtyminute parking space south of] to the southern most edge of the drive way accessing the parking lot of 75 Maple Street. Sec. 24. Half-Hour Parking. (a) No person shall park a vehicle for a period longer than one-half hour at the following locations: (1) [On the east side of South Champlain Street, for a dis tance of 125 feet opposite Independent Food Company.] Attest Daniel Bradley Engineering Division Adopted 2/17/99; Published 3/24/99; Effective 4/14/99. Material in [Brackets] delete. Material underlined add.

The Throbulators are weddings and parties!!

NOTICE TO CREDITORS STATE OF VERMONT DISTRICT OF CHITTENDEN, S.S.

FORAGOODTIMECALL

PROBATE COURT DOCKET ’ ’ NO. 28522

802 827 MOAN

IN RE THE ESTATE OF ROY R. DeSIMONE LATE OF UNDERHILL, VT.

(6 6 2 6 )

MUSIC INSTRUCTION BANJO: Old-time banjo. Guaranteed after 4 lessons you will be playing Appalachian tunes. Learn to read tablature, music notation. Emphasis on rhythm & musicality. $20/hr. Mara McReynolds, 862-3581. BASS: Learn technique, theo ry, reading and groove. All lev els welcome. Keith Hubacher (The Disciples, Nerbak Bros., The Christine Adler Band), rea sonable rates. Call 434-4309. DRUM: Musicians Institute Gradnet Counselor. Exper ienced teacher/musician/ author. Competitive rates. Materials provided. Many sub jects to focus on. References available. Gary Williams, 802472-6819 (mishima® together.net). GUITAR: All styles & levels. Emphasis on developing strong technique, thorough musicianship & persona! style. Paul Asbell (Unknown Blues Revue, Kilimanjaro, Sklar-Grippo, etc.). 862-7696.

To the creditors of the estate of Roy R. DeSimone late of Underhill. I have been appointed a personal represen tative of the above named estate. All creditors having claims against the estate must present their claims in writing within 4 months of the date of the first publication of this notice. The claim must be pre sented to me at the address listed below with a copy filed with the register of the Probate Court. The claim will be forev er barred if it is not presented as described above within the four month deadline.

Pursuant to Section 6104(d) of the Internal Revenue Code, the annual report of the Clio Foundation is available by request during regular busi ness hours within 180 days from the date of this publica tion at Montgomery & Merrill, PC, Certified Public Accountants, 110 Main St., Burlington, VT 05401.

Address of Probate Court: P.O. Box 511, Main Street, Burlington, VT 05402. REQUEST FOR PROPOSAL The City of Burlington is solic iting proposals for a new Women’s Council. Applications available Monday, March 15 at the Burlington Clerk/Treasurer’s Office, 2nd floor, City Hall. Letters of intent due by 4:30 p.m. March 25, complete applications due by 4:30 p.m. April 23.

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March 25-31__ ARIES (Mar. 21-Apr. 19): Your persona is your social facade, the mask you use to represent yourself to the world. For the last couple years, this front has not been a very accurate reflection o f your inner depths. Too often, and sometimes with good cause, you’ve hesitated to unveil the totality o f who you really are. I pre dict that this will change in 1999, however. More and more you’ll have a knack for getting your persona to express the surprising truths about your rowdy, ever-churning soul. And it all starts in earnest now.

TAURUS

(Apr. 20-M ay 20): Some evolutionary scientists claim that humans’ oldest living relative is the starfish. I don’t know about that, but I do know that you will have a resemblance to the creature in the coming weeks. That’s because you will undergo a metaphorical version o f the starfish’s ability to regenerate a limb after it’s been cut off. Whatever you lose — and you will will lose some thing — it will grow back or return to you sooner than you imagined possi ble.

GEMINI

(May 21-June 20): I bet you could land a jet on an aircraft carrier this week, Gemini. I bet you could seduce any cute flirt you want ed, break into a circus and steal a caged lion, and carve an award-win ning likeness o f Garth Books out o f butter. For that matter, you could probably collect more socks for the homeless than anyone has ever collect ed, and do incredible feats o f yardwork for low-income senior citizens, and figure out a brilliant way to score some free computers for the inner city school nearest you. Whatever you set your mind to, I’m sure you’ll do it.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): I remember those months back in 1985 when I woke up every morning asking myself, “So what do I want to be when I grow up?” O n some days I

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pi;'Sp wanted to be a novelist, on other days a performance artist or rock star or teacher o f dream workshops. I even applied to a vocational institute to train as a plumber, and at a graduate school to get a master’s degree in psy chology. As it turned out, I never real ly decided. W hich is why I find myself 14 years later wondering, “So what do I want to be when I grow up?” Fortunately for me, 1999 is the best year in a long time for all us Cancerians to get a definitive answer to that inquiry. And this week is a most propitious moment to intensify the quest.

LEO

(July 23-Aug. 22): Is this the time Nostradamus was referring to when he wrote, “The Lion shall rip the dead lilies off the altar, fix the bro ken toys, spank the devil with a pingpong paddle, and retrieve the halfeaten cake o f love from the back o f the freezer”? After studying the cur rent cosmic configurations, I’ve con cluded that it is. I believe the prophet’s vision describes your accom plishments in the early spring o f 1999. It’s true that in our mediapocalyptic age, there are no heroes, only celebrities. But you’re the closest thing to a hero I’ve seen in a long time. Your heart is 90 percent free o f toxic vibes, and your wise-guy morality rivals that o f my sister when, as a teenager, she squirtgunned grape Kool-Aid in the face o f her abusive gym teacher.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): First I’d like you to tune in to a habit you’re trying to get rid of, a parasite you’d love to flush out o f your life, or a trivial fixation that distracts you from more interesting obsessions. Second, visualize an image that sym bolizes this noxious thing, and imag ine that the smell exuding from it is a

blend o f burnt rubber and stale garlic. Next, picture your soon-to-be ex-vexation on a raft which you gently push out to sea from a beach you’re stand ing on. Finally, watch it drift slowly but inexorably to the horizon till it disappears, taking its bad odor with it. N ow perform this mental exercise every morning for the next 10 days.

LIBRA

(Sept. 23-Oct. 22): It’s a universal truism that in heterosexual couples living together, the woman always buys the toilet paper. In hom o sexual twosomes, the bottom has the same role. But though this pattern may forever rule the behavior o f all the other signs o f the zodiac, I’m fer vently hoping that you Librans will overturn it this week. Indeed, my cos mic sources strongly suggest that to do so will be a potent symbolic state ment that’ll detonate healing in other areas o f your life suffering from imbalance. So risk this brave role reversal, Libra. If you’re a hetero guy or a gay top, provide the damn toilet paper for a change. And then proceed to turn as many other tables, flip as many flops, and perform as many switcheroos as possible.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): According to one o f my favorite sto ries by Jorge Luis Borges, Judas was actually a more unselfish saint than Jesus. He magnanimously volunteered to play the all-important villain’s role in the resurrection psychodrama, knowing he’d get no glory, only scorn. It was a dirty job that only a supreme ly self-sacrificing demigod could have done. I bring this up, Scorpio, because I believe you’re about to be involved in a similar scenario. The good cop can’t win the fight for truth and justice without the bad cop.

SAGITTARIUS

(Nov. 22Dec. 21): “If an infinite number o f rednecks fired an infinite number o f shotguns at an infinite number o f road signs,” reads a holy text from the Discordian society, my favorite reli gious cult, “they’d eventually create all the works o f Shakespeare in Braille.” Similarly, Sagittarius, if you throw yourself with infinite hope into an infinite number o f romantic intrigues, sooner or later you will conjure up a sublime love story. You might have to reincarnate a thousand times, true, but with all eternity at your disposal, you will eventually prevail. If you’d like to speed up the process, however, I’ll make one suggestion: Get it through your beautiful but thickly idealistic head that even a sublime love story must be rife with imperfec-

CAPRICORN

(Dec. 22Jan. 19): Your body cannot tell a lie these days, Capricorn. It may be speaking a language you’re not quite fluent in, though, so I’ll translate. “I’m tired o f the same old food and drink,” your body’s saying. “Treat me to some new taste sensations. And I’m sick o f wearing clothes that remind me o f how I used to feel about myself. Buy me some new ones. I want a fresh image, more room to move, and a touch o f beauty every single day. And if you don’t give it to me, all o f it, now, I will force you to give it to me. I want to want more. I need to feel no guilt for feeling so needy.”

liant classics. A couple years | before he died, though, he cre ated a T V commercial for a yogurt-flavored drink called Calpis, “the taste o f first love.” N o shame in that, right? Even a great artist can’t be working on an exalted masterpiece every day o f his or her life. And I’m sure it must have been one o f the finest commercials ever crafted. I hope Kurosawa’s example inspires you in the coming days, Aquarius, because for you it’ll defi nitely be more o f a yogurt-flavored drink week than a Dersu Uzala week.

PISCES

(Feb. 19-Mar. 20): N ow that you’ve worked 10,000 hours or so to finance your boss’ vacation home and his wife’s facelift, maybe you’re finally ready to figure out how to make yourself richer. There’s rarely been a more ideal time to start down the path to buying your own vacation home and rejuvenating intervention. In fact, I predict that a prosperous opportunity will slip into sight within the next five days — especially if, when you finish reading this horo scope, you use a green felt-tip marker to draw a dollar sign within the shape o f a heart on your palm.

You can call Rob Brezsny, day or night for your

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AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Japanese film director Akira Kurosawa won an Oscar for Best Foreign Film with his 1975 produc tion o f Dersu Uzala. Several o f his other works, including Rashomon and

Touchtone phone, c /s 8 1 8 /3 7 3 -9 7 8 5 And don’t fo rg e t to check out Rob’s Web s ite at wvwvur.realastrology.com/ Updated Tuesday night.

l a s t w e e k ’s a n sw e rs

ACROSS 1 Early serf 5 Forum garb 9 Moss on Broadway? 13 With? sayings 17 Stick for George Szell 18 Actor Jack 18 Moslem ruler 20 Character istic style 22 Mountain nymph 23 Land of Enchantment 25 Willy follower 26 Island group west of the RJIs 28 Site of the U.S. Coast Guard Academy 30 Periodontist's degree 31 Actor Baldwin 32 Definite article 34 Word with admiral or guard 35 Alfonso's queen % With, in Paris 37 Actor Christopher of •Superman" 39 Hi's wife, in comics 41 "I— tell a le " 44 Buys or sells 46 The Roi&ng — 50 Close by, to a

page 4 0

poet 51 Operated 52 'Brevity Is the — of wit" 54 French student 55 Farm breeders 56 Pestle's companion 59 Require 61 Large water pitcher 62 — Mahal 63 Dining room surface 65 Surrender vocally 67 EHdt 69 Wooden peg orpin 71 Historic vessel 72 Sailors 75 Fur piece covering the shoulders 77 Mrs. In Madrid BO Force or drive out 81 Check 83 Nominating 84 Play the lead 85 City In New York 87 A short distance 69 Chang's brother 90 Rhythmical beat 81 Rod or Robert

SEVEN

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93 Large snake 96 Slumbers 97 Flatbottomed boat 99 Trace of corruption 100 Membership 101 Japanese national park 104 Stumble 106 Welcome square 107 Trick takers, often 108 One — time 111 Island north of Australia 114 Virginia seapoft 117 Word with circle or city 118 District in Hampshire, England 120 Half cSameters 121 Violinist Isaac 122 Spicy stew 123 Braeden or Blore 124 Unfolds 125 French weapon 126 Adam or Rebecca 127 Pan or rag lead-in 128 Monster's loch? DOWN 1 Kind of seal

2 Frets 3 One of the Beerys 4 Make an earnest attempt 5 Animal of Madagascar 6 Kind of add 7 Trick:var. 8 Instrument that mea sures amperes 9 Jinx 10 Wi l l Kitchen gadget 12 Garden tool 13 Franciscan War' 14 Norse god of war 15 Diacritical mark 16 Athenian statesman 17 “Le! him look to Ns —‘ (Shakes.) 21 Tropical bird of Asia 24 BibSca! name 27 Decay In overripe fruit 29 Indochinese kingdom 33 Arden et al. 36 Duck genus 37 Tsited wildly 38 Harrow’s rival 40 The — ; part of the

march 24, 1999

channel off the Isle of Wight 41 Play person nel 42 Wild ox 43 The Garden State 44 Loose, earthy deposit 45 Takes to court 47 English seaport 48 — Knievel 49 Withered 51 "Mister —* (role for Henry Fonda) 53 Bounding 58 Manufac tures 57 Above 58 Mountain ash tree 60\..rag e against the — of the light* 63 Unit of weight 64 Chinese wax 66 One, in Pads 68 Heart, lungs, etc. 70 Regret deeply 72 Debatable 73 German hall 74 Defeats at bridge 76 Pale tinge

78 Coarse file 79 War god 82 •— Me in St. Louis" 84 Hard fat 86 Piano composition 88 Baby carnage 90 Metal breastplate 92 A Bantu speaking people 94 Billy Joel's instrument 95 Pierced 96 Prophet 98 Son out 100 Put an end to 101 Cuckoos 102 Actress Berger 103 Proprietor 105 English dramatist 107 Projection on church building 108 Yellow fever mosquito 109 Gemini 110 Tag on sale hern 112 Origin 113 Pointed tools 115 New Zealand caterpillar 116 Back of the neck 119 Diet restric tion

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YO man who wants to be a chef, likes traveling & quiet get-togethers. 2681 LEADING RANDOM LIFE-LIKE METANAR RATIVE. Please have a sense of humorln (and similar age, values, etc.) 43, settled down, but not slowed down, upbeat, offbeat, usta-B-athlete. With you?...Life complete... 2682______ ATTRACTIVE, FIT PWF, NS, ENJOYS blading, skiing, hiking, working out, travel, good conversation, dining out & much more. ISO same in handsome, fit WM, NS, 30-45, in Burl, area. 2684 OWNER OF A LONELY HEART SEEKS soulmate for friendship, possible LTR. S/DWF, 31 , seeking adventurous, spon taneous SWM, 26-35 , who likes chil dren, knows how to enjoy life. No games, please. 2687_______________ SWF, 34, BEAUTIFUL, YOUTHFUL, ALLAmerican girl ISO gorgeous allAmerican guy, 27-35 , model, actor, or easy-going prof. Romance, open mind, values, travel, exp., fun. 2648

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THE ONE I SEEK HAS SPARK, HUMOR, stability, spontaneity, health and looks, loves adventure, dancing, spoiling me with attention. He’s unmarried, NS, 4050, and appreciates beauty and green eyes. 2726________________________ CORPORATE DILBERTIA BY DAY, god dess of eclectic desires by night. I need a man of many colors. Throw in your bid if you think you can tame this Kate. 2732________________________ CANCERIAN SWF, 27 , DIRTY-BLONDE, short hair, green eyes, fluent in German, sense of humor, ISO SWM, 2535 , who’s cute, smart, optimistic, NS, w/ life exp. & affectionate for LTR. 2691 THREE CRAZY 20-SOMETHING room mates ISO the diggidy... If you enjoy life on a higher plane, then we’re the buds for you! 2692_________________ STARVING ARTIST ISO MODEL. Cinderella ISO Prince Charming. Climber ISO partner. Skier ISO freshies. Who knows what my evil twin is looking for? 2704

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2818 BiWM, 26, GEEK, SEEKS FAIRY PRINCESS with whom to share miscel laneous nerdy pursuits. Must be NS/ND and enjoy film, art, music and life in general. 2836_____________________ LIFE IS FOR LIVERS. Fit, attractive, ide alistic SPM, 46, seeks smart, sexy, happy, progressive woman (with a good liver) to share culture, travel, out door activities, politics, partying and shade-tree philosophizing. Laughter, music and love happen! 2843________ SWPCM, 36, CATHOLIC W/ A GREAT attitude towards life seeks F with similar perspective for friendship. 2837 SEEKING PRETTY, SEXY WOMAN (21+) for exciting romance. SWPM, 25, attrac tive, dark, healthy, honest, fen. Let’s enjoy outdoors, gourmet food, kind beer and romantic nights. I’m your dream man. Call! 2849______________ 43 YO, 5’ 9", 210 LBS., ENJOYS DINING, day trips, boating, bowling, quiet times, music, treating a lady nicely. Looking for a F, 25-44, with similar interests for LTR. 2838______________ IF YOU’RE FUN, FIT, ATTRACTIVE, edu cated, high-energy and spontaneous, then we have a lot in common. SWPM looking for F, 35 -45, approx. 5’ 6” . Successful and generous soul seeking mate. 2839_______________________ CARPENTER, MUSICIAN, ANIMAL LOVER, lover of life. SWM, 39, seeking healthy F, 27 -40, no racists. I’m 5’ 9” , 190 lbs. 2842_____________________________ DWM, 43, 5’ 8” , SLIM, ISO MUSICAL attractive, spiritual poetess/ 26+, Wifh~ appreciation of the absurd. Let’s sing, talk, laugh 81 cook together. Children, pets, imagination welcome! ND/NA. 2844________________________________ SWPM, TALL 34. MUSICAL FOLKY, active, outdoorsy, casual, dog-owning, educated, etc...ISO grown-up Ivory girl tomboy; maybe one-time sunshine daydream, 2qs - 3 qs . Open to future. 2779 ST. J MAN: DWM, 43, RUNNER, HIKER, lifter, loves music, dancing, seeks voluptuous F for adventures in the Kingdom. Children OK. Race unimportant. Good intellect appreciated. 2781

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2800

SWPF, 31 , EDUCATED, MATURE, LOVES travelling, movies, good food, humor, long walks. Enjoys healthy balance of togetherness and independence. ISO good guy: fun, mature, interesting. No games, NS, ND. 2708_______________ PLUS-SIZED WOMAN, 54, MONTPELIER, loves movies, dancing, good food, strolling, reading, discussing books. Let’s have coffee, see movie/concert. Only friendship/companionship in beginning. Must love dogs/cats. 2717 NATURAL BEAUTY, SOULFUL, SENSUAL, 25, 5’6” , dark curls cascading, physically/emotionally fit. You: tall, non-con formist, beautiful, beard(?), incense, candles. Know your path? I do. 2666

SOUL SEARCHING. Honest, thin, attrac tive, unique SWM, 26, tired of women that aren’t interested in a relationship. ISO similar, caring SWF who is willing to make time to be together. 2783 HI. SWPM, 29, 5*6", 160 LBS., short brown hair, hazel eyes. I’m neat, clean, organized. Can carry on intelligent con versation, good sense of humor. No kids, financially stable, college degree, never been married. Very active 8t fit. ISO a LTR w/ the right person. 2785 DALAI LAMA MAMAS WANTED by spiri tual, musical, lover of children, god seeking Rasta man. In the middle of the woods or NYC you feel at home. What’s your purpose on this planet? 2807____________________ BARRE NON-TOXIC DWM, 41, HUMOR OUS, intelligent, attractive, nature-lov ing, leisurely athletic 81 neutered multi cuisine omnivore. Seeks intelligent, diverse, 420-tolerant & mellow lady to 'share life’s daily pleasures. 2795_____ BELIEVE IN MAGIC? Let’s cast spells. What the heavens know the heart con firms. SWM, Capricorn, 52 , looking for soulmate, Rutland area. Interests: cooking, photography, the craft. 2796 PAINTER IN BLUE PERIOD, 23 , ISO wor ried woman to ease worried mind. Fancies Nabokov, Pixies, thermodynam ics, harmonica’s play, skeleton keys, rain. Dislikes long walks. Braitjs, beau ty, opposable thumbs a plus. 2798

Dear

Lola,

My partner wants me to talk dirty during sex, and I’m anxious to fulfill his request, but I just can’t make myself do it. Cvery time we start making love. I find myself hopelessly tongue-tied and selfccnscicus. Any sugges tions about how I might overcome this hang up? Mum in Mcnktcn Dear Aium, your partner under stands that sex is a multi-sensory experi ence. Touch, taste, smell, sight and sound all work together to make making love mem orable or mundane. But I wonder why your lover isn’t rising to the occa sion and talking the talk himself)? Jcu wouldn’t feel nearly so self-conscious if it weren’t a solo perfor mance. Tell him you prefer dialogues to monologues. Then do a little homework, sc you don't have to improvise. Here are a few handy words to get you start ed: fill, hot, want, drip ping, luscious, big. juicy, hammer. Lcve- s i ?

J j o

l a

Or respond t h e o ld -fa sh io n w ay: CALL THE 9 0 0 NUMBER.

Call 1-900-870-7127 $1.99/mfn. m ust be 18+

march

24, 1999

SEVEN DAYS

page

don’t want a charge on your phone bill? call 1 -800- 710-8727 and use your credit card. 24 hours a day!

$ 1.99 a minute, must be 18 +.

In th e mood fo r a party? SPRING FLING SINGLES PARTY, Friday, M a y 7 a t Club M etro n o m e. B rought to you by: SEVEN DAYS and WEZF. C h eck this s p a ce next w e e k fo r m ore info. GREAT CATCH. DPWM, 50, fit, active

A Q o kin q w o m a n , a m t DWM, EARLY 40S, smart but appropri ate, attractive but imperfect, horny but discreet, fun but has as many bad habits as the rest. Are you that much different? 2802_____________ _ ______ DO YOU FIT INTO MY LIFE? DWPM, 6’, .42, half yuppie in excellent shape, into organics and life. Travels light. Seeks F w/ similar qualities under 46. 2804 RICH MAN/POET, CLAIMING STARS, moon and Northern Lights yet...romance takes two, I don’t have you. Seeking thirtysomething, slim, attractive attitude. Aspiring magic woman seeking successful eco-man. 2767_____________________________ EXTREME ALL-WEATHER COMMUTER cyclist, 25 , seeks a strong, laid-back woman who is proud to wear her bike shoes in public and carry a helmet and backpack. Bike Power! 2749_________ SWCM, 30, SEEKING SOULMATE. Enjoys outdoor activities. Seeking semi-normal SWCF, 24-37 , must be honest, sincere and looking for LTR, friends first. ND, NS, no games, please. Kids OK. 2764 TURN ME ON. HANDSOME, HEALTHY & long-haired, 21 YO M ISO healthy, fit F for erotic adventures! Clean, safe, and discreet. Be creative! 2752___________ SNOWBOARDER/OUTDOOR ENTHUSI AST!! SWM, 27 , looking for a drinking partner and conversation over riding, camping and life. New to the area; looking for directions and fun!! 2765 FUN-LOVING OR PLANE CRAZY? Find out! SWM, 26, enjoys flying, skiing/riding, fine dining, movies, water sports, travel, single malts. ISO humorous SWF, NS, 21 -30, to go AWOL with. 2769 BARELY ATTRACTIVE M SEEKS FURTHER REJECTION. Have a dead-end job, no personality and a bad sense of humor. Looking for a deaf and blind woman with no self-esteem. 2758___________ AN ENGLISHMAN IN VERMONT. Looking for an independent and intelligent woman who enjoys good food and laughs. I am 35 , 6’, 180 lbs., handsome, NS, professional. 2761_________ TALL, GOOD-LOOKING M, 29, FROM NYC, educated and articulate, seeks red hot, sexy female for fun times. Let’s set the night on fire. 2762______ WE DESERVE IT! Tired of relationships lacking passion? SWM, 30, attractive, slim/med. build, seeks trim, attractive SF who believes in balance of gentle ness w/ intensity and appreciates film, food, spontaneity, laughter & being active. 2772_______________________ DESCARTES WALKS INTO A BAR. The bartender asks him if he would like a drink. Descartes replies, “ I think not” and disappears. DWPJM with tongue planted firmly in cheek. 2776________

ATTRACTIVE DWPM, 40S, BLONDE, FIT, ISO beautiful, confident, Rubenesque PF. Enjoy outdoors, art museums, city suppers, love life. Am open, learning to listen, w/ great sense of humor. 2722

$100 REWARD FOR INFORMATION lead ing to the altar and connection of Ms. Right. She’s about 40, around 125 lbs., attractive, fit, energetic, romantic. She likes animals, country, farming. If you’ve seen her, call this number and give up to love. 2745_______ _______ SINGLE 30 YO SEEKS PARTNER. Not desperate, just thought I’d try some thing new. Me: 5’n ” , dark hair, Spanish descendant, romantic at heart. Into jazz and art, moonlight walks. Seeking someone similar. 2734_______ T LL TAKE THE CURTAIN, BOB.” SWM, 32 , seeks single woman in Ctrl. VT, 2535 ish, for fun and maybe more. I’m fit, fun, creative, educated, kind and not too had lookin’. No smokers or (sorry) kids, please. 2735_________________ SM, 52, RUTLAND AREA, SEEKS attrac tive lady, 30-55, for dating leading to LTR. Only ladies seeking respect, car ing, and honesty need respond. I’m , 5*11 ” , blue eyes, brown hair. 2737 YOU: REAL 81 SURREAL, SERIOUS &. NOT, active & lazy, a betty. Me: 27 & 2, famous & infamous, willing & will ful, a knuckledragger. Let’s hit the halfpipe together. 2738________________ GUARANTEED TO MAKE YOU SMILE. DWPM, 37 , blonde/blue, 5’io ” , athletic, Fit, romantic, seeking honest, fit, slen der, open-minded F. Let’s laugh all day and love all night. 2740 _______ UNIQUE SWM, 30, 5'9” , 165 LBS., seeks intelligent, fit & fun NS F, 24-32 .' I enjoy music, working out', chess, trav el, “ Seinfeld” repeats, & lots more. 2 7 4 3 ______________________ *____ ____________

IF U CN RD THS, U CLD HV A GRT DT! DWPM, 43 , educated, active; fit, enjoys bicycling, hiking, conversation, books, travel. ISO significant other. Ctrl. VT, but will travel. 2694_____ '_________ _ LETS MEET NOW AND AVOID THE sum mer rush! SWPM, 33 , handsome, witty and brainy, seeking very bright, very pretty, younger student or prof., 23-28, to get to know, share fun with. 2697 FUN, FUN, FUN. That’s what I’m looking for. SWM, 40s, 145 lbs., 5*9” , nice looking, loves to travel, hike, etc. Let’s have an adventure together, it’s more fun. 2702_______________ SWM, 40, HUMOROUS/ROMANTIC. Do you enjoy golf, camping, playing cards, star gazing, bike riding, weekend get aways, back rubs, soft music, candle light dinners & good wine? ISO honest, Fit, down-to-earth, humorous F. 2703 SWM. Real intercourse begins in our minds—deep thoughts, brave living, fresh, cold air, savvy, sexy, sensitive, not in city. Desires cool kitty, slightly thrifty, worldly, faux hippy. Let’s com bine and boogie. 2706

ISO CHEERY CHEERLEADER TO LEAVE the sidelines and join the game. Let’s get it on! Large pom-poms a +. 2721

intelligent & easy on the eyes, ISO active, slim, spontaneous, outdoor type, 40-50, to enjoy nature’s gifts. I enjoy skiing, hiking, canoeing, photog raphy, reading & travel. Friends first? Let’s try it. 2707___________________ THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT A DIS CREET tattoo and/or a pierced part! Wanted: Artistic, Athletic, Attractive, feminine female for friendship, relation ship, approx. 25-35 . Available: AAA, masculine male, about 35 . 2709______ LIFE’S BETTER..WITH POSITIVE MENTAL attitude. SWPM, 29, fit, 150 lbs. Seeking female friendship, possible LTR. Passionate climber, mountaineer, back-country skier, many skills, inter ests. House-trained, honest, reliable. Enjoys learning, sharing, having fun when work’s done. 2710 NORWEGIAN WOOD, HESSE’S GOLDmund/Siddhartha, creative, contempla tive, univ. grad., world traveler, SWPM, 28, 5’ 9” , 145 lbs., athletic, cute. ISO PF, sexy, athletic, attractive mistress/ love mentor for Sunday morning coffee/ “Afternoon Delight.” 2715________ SWM, 26, SCORPIO SEEKS ATTRACTIVE, fit F for company & fun. I find the eyes the most attractive feature of a woman. Tall, athletic, very attractive, great smile, easy to get along. Not seeking LTR right away. Strong sex drive has kept me single. Safe-sex people only, please. 2716______________ THE ROAD NOT TAKEN. The woods are • lovely, dark & deep. Free spirit loves running, drawing, jazz, children, nature, photography, hiking, writing, being w/ someone special. NS, 5’ 9” , 160. 2718 INTEGRITY & HUMOR. SWM, 44, w/ high marks for integrity/humor would like to meet attractive, fit, NS woman, 33 -50, who enjoys sports, good food, laughter & friends. Children OK. 2719 BIG WIT, BIG BRAIN, CASTLE PLANS & motel pockets, tall, fit, jeans & T-shirt, handsome SWM writer, 30. Seeks selfobsessed, hip, lanky genius. Brief: Rilke seeks Betty Blue. Ctrl. VT. 2678 TIRED OF BARS. NOT DESPERATE. Just thought I’d try something different. 5’n ” , dark hair, athletic build. Loves music, art, fine dining. Duke Ellington to Led Zepp. Travels lite. 2655 DWM, 35 , STRONG SILENT TYPE, attractive, easy-going, romantic.^ Likes outdoors activities. Likes children. ISO woman who is old-fashioned, emotionally secure, 28-38. 2662_____________ TALL, DARK & HANDSOME. REALLY! Fit, energetic artist, 27, seeks playmate for partying, movies, techno, adventures w/ an independent, attractive lady who likes to dress up. Gothic a +. 2668 DWM, 50s, INTENSE, INTERESTING per sonality who appreciates the simple, natural, honest qualities in life & peo ple. ISO attractive SWF, late 40S-50S, NS, ND. P.S.—plays jazz piano. 2669

Winner also receives a gift certificate for a FREE Day Hiker’s Guide to VT from

closeout ' 19 1 Bank St., Burlington 860-0190

WANNA DANCE? NO MIND GAMES! No baggage! Seeking friendship, fun and romance! Playful SWPM, 41, witty, charming conversationalist, adventur- . ous, athletic type desires attractive, fit SWPF, 33 -40. Outrageous, outspoken, classy, sassy...all OK! 2672_______ _ LIFT ME UP. SOON TO BE SEPARATED, 4oish Dad needs a DWF who’s been there, done that, and didn’t buy the Tshirt. Share with me your insight, strength, love and affection and get it back.100-fold. 2679________________ READ THE CLUE AND I WILL MEET YOU where the mall buildings are blue. M, 50s, seeking NS vegetarian F, moderate walking, snowshoeing, XC-skiing, per forming big-band music. 2689

A so km q w o m e n BARRE AREA, 35. PETITE & FUN-LOV ING. Seeking GF who enjoys nature, the arts, spirituality, literature, etc. A F who also values the art of communication, commitments & a LTR. 2720 BEAUTIFUL, ATHLETIC BiWF, 31 , blonde, 5’ 7” , newly relocated, seeks openminded, secure, charming F for fun, friendship, whatever might happen. 2725________________________________ ATTRACTIVE, FREE-SPIRITED SF WHO enjoys music, dancing, the outdoors, conversation, and a daily 420 seeks same, 18-29. Please, no lipstick, bighair femmes. Must be attractive. 2731 PRINCESS CHARMING? HELP! 18 YO damsel-in-distress seeks 18-23 YO to rescue me from everyday blahs. Let’s talk about musicals and politics while sipping a hot cup of cider. 2733

ISO A LITTLE ROMANCE. Active, attrac tive, 47, 6’i ” , NS, kids. Interests include dancing, XC-skiing, music, cooking, theater, blading. Emotionally available & willing to take risks. 2671

UVM STUDENT, 18 , CAN’T SIT STILL. If you feel a weird need to get up & sing karaoke, take pictures of your food, or get lost in the woods in the middle of April-,'give me a call, maybe we can do all three. ISO F, 18 -24, with energetic attitude. 2644_______ _____________ SMART, POLITICAL DYKE WITH A good sense of humor, craving the end of winter, is ISO someone similar to hang out with, friendship & the rest?? 2651

A s o k in q m e n GWM, 45, LOVES COOKING, GARDEN ING, travel, long drives. ISO GWM, 35 55 , for LTR. Let’s get to know each other. 2814_____________________ GWM, LATE 50S ISO MALES FOR FUN & friendship. Age/race open. I’m 5’io ” , balding & a little overweight, but love to please. 2841__________________ CAN JOHNNY COME OUT AND PLAY? Is Johnny afraid to come out or be found out? GWPM, 42, ISO others, 25-45, who want to play or LTR. Marital status not important. 2848________________ DAD, 48, GOOD-LOOKING & FIT, seeks son, 18-25 . You must be boyish, intelli gent and affectionate. Your discretion’s expected, mine’s assured. 2815_______ ISO CHUBBY OR LARGER GWM IN THE Burl, area for romance, LTR and/or friendshhip. Age unimportant. 2780 MOSTLY SUBMISSIVE GWM, 35. 6’, 185 lbs. Handsome, masculine “ guy next door” seeks simiilar males, 20-40, for erotic 5&M role games. 2794________ LOOKING FOR THE PERFECT GUY? GWM, 23, blonde, blue eyes, nice-looking, thin, ISO LTR w/ athletic M, 18 -30. I’m an outdoor lover, animal appreciator. Let’s discover happiness together. 2750

TheMostly Unfjabulcus Social Lifeof £than Green D o n ’t

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by Eric Orner D O N ’T OFFER AN INADEQUATE GRATUITY.

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YOU THROUGH THE VIP DOOR, A N D T H E N ASK HIM TO LET IN YOUR PARTY OF 1 6 CLOSEST GIRLFRIENDS ALSO.

D O N ’T FLIRT, UNLESS YOU ARE GOING TO BE SUCCESSFUL.

D O N ’T THREATEN HIM W ITH KARATE

W W W . S T o n e w a a L iN N .C o rA

page 4 2

SEVEN DAYS

inarch 2 4 ,1 9 9 9

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to respond to a personal ad call l- Q O O - 3 7 0 '7 1 2 7

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we’re open 24 hours a day!

GWPM, 42, 5’9", 160 LBS., stable life, loves traveling, music, movies, snug gling, outdoors. One-man guy, not into one-night stands. ISO GWM, 25-45, friendship leading to romance. 2667 I KNOW YOU ARE HERE IN BURLINGTON. You are 18-25 , blonde/green(?), straight-acting, cool, funny, cute. Do you exist? I do. Anyone? Hello? 2680

[men M oklnq m m , coni GWM, 33 , 6', 170 LBS., BR./BR., goa tee, workboots & jeans type, seeking cutie with a great personality. Be out, NS, ND, positive outlook and love to laugh. Dog lover who prefers modesty over arrogance. 2774_______________

GWM, 38, 5’11", 210 LBS. IS ANYONE out there? Looking for gay friends, etc., for fun or whatever! I am average-look ing and seek people who are real. Possible LTR. Hurry. 2683

NEW TO SCENE. SWM, 50, seeks top males for fun and friendship. Age/race open. I’m 5’u ” , med. build, blue eyes, brown hair. 2736_____________ _____ GWM, 35 , LOOKING FOR WELL-BUILT, sincere, down-to-earth friends. Must love the mountains of northern VT. You should have a good heart and love nature. Call me. 2742_______________

NEW TO VT: 23 , BROWN HAIR, BLUE eyes, 6’ 2” . Hobbies: video games, par tying, 420, movies, and making people laugh. Looking for straight-acting M, 18-25, similar hobbies, up for partying the night away. 2645_______________

MASCULINE, CONFIDENT GWM, athletic, 30s, 6’, 175 lbs., intelligent, fun, out going, attractive, genuine, looking to meet guys in Champlain Valley area. You be college-educated, masculine, attractive and aged 23 -35 . 2656______ GWM, 50S, SCORPIO. I’M CARING, pas sionate, honest, sincere. Seek a 40+ male; must be a top. Looks not impor tant, only sincerity and honesty. All replies answered. 2661

PASSIVE CROSSDRESSER, BiWM, 40S, smooth body, long legs, painted toe nails, high heels. Seeking gentle younger M. Treat me like a F. Any race. Kinky nights. Sensual fun/kisses. 2649 MISCHIEVOUSLY SENSUAL AND scathingly cynical GWM, 28, ISO a lum berjack who will read me Italian fairy tales while I sleep and show me earthly delights as I wake. 2653

To respond to Letters Only ads: Seal your response in an envelope, write box # on the outside and place in another envelope with $5 for each response. Address to: PERSON TO PERSON c/o SEVEN DAYS. P.O. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402

ATTRACTIVE BLONDE, GREEN-EYED SWF, NS, 19 , co-ed at elite university ISO SWM, NS, fit, clean, smart, likes tennis, sailing, Rollerblading, or golf; at least 5’ io ” & under 30. For friendship, possible summer romance. Box 471 FIT THE BILL? Looking for SM who has hairy chest or deep voice or both. I also like men in uniform. You must be 32-46. Box 475____________________ DWPF, SHY AT FIRST, WARM, CUTE, great smile, 4oish, loves traveling, gar dening, exercise. Seeks nice g u y charming, grounded, well-balanced, active listener—for LTR. Sense of humor a must. Photo. Box 473_______ ALLIGATOR WRESTLER. Delicious, lanky brunette, 47, seeks sophisticated, iron ic, tall SW gentleman, NS, for cinema soiree, delicatessen tete a tete, friendship. VT islands. Box 459____________

ACTIVE, LITERATE, CREATIVE, MATURE F searching for man, 55-65, who can laugh while discussing the meaning of life. Let’s try canoeing, walking in the woods, or sharing dim sum. Box 483 LIFE IS A JOURNEY. Shall we meet? Attractive NSPF ISO NSSWPM, 40S. Traditional values, socially responsible, health-conscious, more. Box 481______ AVID GARDENER, ARTISAN, EARLYretired SPF w/ varied interests ISO M,

55-65, for companionship, good con versation, exploring the joys of life. Box 482 ______________________ INDEPENDENT, CONFIDENT, INTELLI GENT, humorous, 43, mother of one (5), great shape, attractive, auburn hair, brown eyes, enjoys beach, hiking, candles, sushi, music, and woodstove heat. ISO similar, honest man. Box 469 FEISTY 81 ENGAGING, CUTE/SEXY SWF, 32, fit, runner, passionate about every thing, own business. Desires SWPM, 30-42, worldly, centered, tall, sexy mesomorph. Active listener, soulful, imaginative, intuitive, NS, Scrabble(?). Photo appreciated. Box 470

LITERATE, ARTICULATE, HONEST F W/ sense of humor seeks intelligent M, 55-65, with same for friendship, maybe more. No God freaks, egocentrics, big ots. Color, national origin irrelevant. Box 460__________________________ LOVE LIFE—THAT’S ABOUT IT. SWF, 47, seeking companion and serious heat. Thrills and peace. Let’s exchange crazy ideas and photos. I promise to write all brave souls who respond. Box 455

EROTIC FUN: SWM, 28, BROWN HAIR & eyes, seeking females, 18-40, for erotic adventures. Don’t be shy. Live out your fantasies. Will reply to all. Discretion given and expected. 2809___________ MaWM, 30, ATTRACTIVE, ISO MaF who’s as bored as I am. Looking for some adult fun & adventure. Very clean, safe and discreet. No relationships. 2813 SWM, EARLY 30S, 5’lo", 170 LBS. ISO ladies, 19-45, who are looking for all the fun without any of the head games. Friendship as well as the physical. 2847_________________________ CREATIVE 8l EROTIC ROLE PLAY. Sophisticated 81 imaginative. Safe, sane & discreet. 2835___________________ SWF, 35 , ISO WOMEN OR MEN WHO enjoy the outdoors. New to Ctrl. VT. Would like to meet people who enjoy telemark skiing, snowboarding, backpacking, tennis, hiking 8i cycling. 2778 SF, 18, ISO A PERSON INTERESTED IN interesting relationship with an openminded, somewhat kinky person who wants’to party. Fear of LTR not a prob lem. Friendship element a must. 2801

GENUINE, GENEROUS GENTLEMAN, safe, sane, selectively seeking sensu ous, bold, bored (beautiful?) brat desir ing discreet, delicious dalliance. Dare we explore beyond these dime-a-dozen ads? Box 484_____________________ YOU'VE EXPERIENCED THE REST, NOW try the best! I’m a keeper, are you? SWM, 35 , NA/NS/ND, down-to-earth, decent guy ISO my future wife! Interested? Write me! Box 478________ TALL, EDUCATED, HANDSOME, athletic SWM, 27, ISO intelligent, slim, attrac tive F, 35 -45, for discreet, sensual fun. Race/marital status unimportant. Send letter/photo to receive same. Box 474 WANT ROMANCE. DWPM, 60, slim, tall, NS, social drinker, honest, reliable, seeks attractive, affectionate F, 40-60, likes travel, dining out, walking, tennis, financially secure. Poss. LTR. Box 463 DWM, 58, DOWN-TO-EARTH, NS, LIKE to meet a lady, NS, not overweight, but most of all a lady who can be true to one man. Box 464_______________ TLC & RESPECT avail, from gentleman in late 50s from NY side of lake. Invest a postage stamp 81 short note. Who knows? Box 467___________________ SPIRIT-FILLED C DAD WHO BELIEVES that “ Mountains bow down, the seas will roar at the sound of Your Name.” Looking for same, see a movie, walk along Lake Champlain. Box 468

•

W m m mm m $ m # • • #

$ 1.99 a minute, must be 18 or older.

MaWCU, EARLY 40S, ISO ATTRACTIVE, straight M for intimate threesome. Our first time. May take some talking to convince her. Healthy & discreet, expect same. 2806_________________ BiWM, 36, HAIRY, FIT, FIERCELY LOYAL, loves walking, massage, reading, writ ing, cats, creativity, gardening, learning, ISO F, M, CU for friendship, ecstasy, conversation, integration, fun & maybe even excellent sex. 2784____________ SWM, 28, FUN, HONEST 81 INTERESTED in meeting others who like to have good times & fun. Into all that feels good 81 agreed upon by all. D/D free. 2766_____________________________ TALL, ATTRACTIVE, VERY ATHLETIC SWM, 27 , ISO 2 or more slim, attrac tive females, 18-30, for sexy, good times. Call now. 2768_______________ ENERGETIC FEMALE AEROBIC DANCERS, 18-35 , for bra and panty aerobic video. A Bachelor Party production. Please inquire. 2773______________________ MISSING DREAMS OF FLYING FREE through your skies doing back flips? WM ISO F, 27 -45, to enjoy sensual/erotic outings. Love to tease, then please female form. Attractive, healthy, confidential. 2741______________________ ATTRACTIVE WCU IN MID-20S LOOKING for BiF, 18 -30, for anything but a dull moment. 2744

NORTHERN VT M, 48, NOT PART OF the rush-to-Burlington-weekend-scene, seeks F, 25-35, to climb mountains, canoe and garden. I love movies, but watch no TV. Box 456_______________ YOUNG SWM, GREAT LOOKS 81 BODY, looking for possible LTR with someone who likes snowboarding, dancing and walk abouts. You: sense of humor, honest, ND, and comfortable with your self. Like me. Box 458______________ SWPM, 27, 5’9", 180 LBS., FIT, INTO music & work (hence the ad). Seeking mature, attractive SWF for serious quality time. Photo helpful, but not req. It’s just a letter, c’mon. Box 453

SHY BiF WANTING BiF or BiCURIOUS F for friendship and frolic. Must be between 21 -35 , secure, open-minded, outgoing, who loves conversation and sensual contact. Box 480____________ LOOKING TO MEET SOME GREAT, LOVE LY pen pals out there and to find that someone special to share my life with. Hope to hear from you lovely pen pals. Box 476__________________________ MaBiWF, 29, ISO BiF, NS, FUN, FIT, intellectual, sexual, with-it. Not seeking LTR, feminagendas, nicaddicts, techno phobes. Make-up and bi-lingual a plus. Great face, brown eyes preferred. Happiness, contentment, brains absolutely required. Box 461

'■A p l} VT PUB 81 BREWERY, 3/ 12. I’ve seen you before, around town at different shows, you were behind the sound * board for Currently Nameless. You were always w/ someone, are you still? 2817 I SPY A MACROBIOTIC JUNK-FOOD JUNKIE! Happy Birthday, Jungle Bunny (from your Love Monkey!).___________ RED SQUARE, 3/ 5, 8 p.m. (night before big storm): You’re dark-haired, were wearing a dark jacket, w/ friend. I was the blonde lad sitting by the door w/ friend. You glanced 2x, and gave me one long smile before leaving. I was staring, smiled & looked away. Care for a pint sometime? 2782______________ TAAHA, 2/ 28, DESIGNS. You: working and captivating. Me: shopping for jeans (36-32). I showed you a shirt I bought. I enjoyed the moment. Any chance for us to meet? 2791_________ GREEN CHEROKEE, NJ TAG, “MAGIC Happens” sticker, I-89, Sunday. You: very pretty, beautiful smile, driving north. Me: silver A4, single, interested. We played tag, parted exit 14. Can we meet? 2799

GWPF, 34, ATTRACTIVE, DISCREET, 'pas sionate romantic who loves the compa ny of feminine women. ISO friendship first with a discreet, NS GWPF, 35-50, who enjoys movies, music, cooking, communicating 81 long walks. Take a chance, I’ll respond to all. Box 457

GWM, 24, BR./BL, 170 LBS., ISO GAY friends, 20-40. I like hiking, biking, nature, etc. A sense of humor a plus. Box 477________________ ________ Bi-CURIOUS M, MID-40S, STOWE AREA, outdoors type, biker, distance runner, seeks clean & discreet, fit BiM/CU for weekday workout 81 massage. Box 472

TALL, FIT, BiCURIOUS PWM, 40S, seeks BiM or CU for good times. Must be clean, discreet, educated and not overweight. Box 479_________________ __ MaWM, LATE 50S, SEEKS Ma/SF, 45+, for sensual LTR. I am clean, discreet, NS, available most anytime. Have prop erty in quiet country setting. Box 466 mailbox. Box 465

4 digit box numbers can be contacted either through voice mail or by letter. 3 digit box numbers can only be contacted by letter. Send letter along w/ $5 to PO Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402 L O V E IN C Y B E R S P A C E . P O IN T Y O U R W E B B R O W S E R T O

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How to respond to a persona •C H O O S E YO UR FAVORITE A D S A N D NOTE T H EIR BOX N U M B E R S . •C A L L 1 - 9 0 0 - 3 7 0 - 7 1 2 7 FROM A T O U C H -T O N E P H O N E . 1 - 9 0 0 # BLO CK ? C A L L 1 - 8 0 0 - 7 1 0 - 8 7 2 7 . •FO L L O W IN G THE VOICE P R O M P T S, P U N C H IN TH E 4 -D IG I T BOX # O F T H E AD Y O U W IS H TO ---^R E S P O N D TO, O R YOU MAY B R O W SE A S P E C IF IC CATEGORY.

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SEVEN DAYS

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Field Experiences at Summer University.

Courses that actually take you out on the battlefield at Gettysburg, canoeing through Canada, exploring Balis spiritual paths and other intriguing places. To register or get a Focus catalog call: 800-639-3210 or visit us online at:http://www.uvm.edu/~dceweb/

S P E N D SUMMER OUT OF THE ORDI NARY.

UNIVERSITY of VERMONT