Seven Days, April 22, 1998 by Seven Days

ODD, STRANGE, CURIOUS AND WEIRD BUT TRUE NEWS ITEMS FROM EVERY CORNER OF THE GLOBE .

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Hum

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vacy.

«,„.„ „ M

would say don't ever, ever, ever put a hirrh a n n o u n c e m e n t in the

paper," the center's Cathy Nahirny

X Mark* the Svct mg to researchers. Writing in the Journal ofthe American Medical besides being more likely ro engage in oral and anal sex. circumcised men also masturbate more frequently. That finding is particularly in; noted, because circumcision was once widely advocated to prevent masturbation. • Dutch doctors announced they have developed a new surgical technique "to reconstruct the hymens of adolescent girls who are no longer virgins but wish co appear so." Rotterdam gynecologist Adrian Logsman reported in the British

Medical

jounmlihat the operations arc intended chiefly for "immigrant women' from cultures that require brides to be virgins.

After years of requiring to;

in traffic circles, Belgium changed its road rules to give vehicles it of way. to provide any

told The Washington

Families of some o f the 34 WIIIUI UW1.1 rwu(

crash that killed C o m m e r c e

announcements, but our society

into an attacking b e a r s face, not

Secretary R o n Brown in Croatia

has changed. All it takes is one. 1 '

worn like mosquiro spray. Even so,

blamed the accident on an inaccu-

D e s p i t e the c e n t e r s fears, die

he noted, "We've had s o m e parents

rate navigation chart used by the

Times cited C e n s u s Bureau a n d

spray it o n their children because

U . S . Air Force pilots and

law enforcement records showing

announced they were suing the

that o f 5 0 million U . S . babies

map maker, Jeppesen Sanderson Inc.

born in the past 11 years, only

because its designed to be sprayed

it says bear repellent."

Curtei, Foiled Again T h r e e N e w York City robbers figured -

out how to bypass the

World Trade C e n t e r s extensive security measures, then accost-

protection against bears actually attracts the animals, according to U.S. Geological Survey researcher Tom Smith. While observing brown bear activity, he noticed a bear rolling on a rope that had been sprayed with the red pepper extract. To test the link, Smith said he sprayed the extract on the beach* Several bears approached 500-

pound cat with a ball of catnip,M Smith said. "Little did we knowthis stuff was like mayonnaise on bologna." The maker of the pep-

other victims o f the 1 9 9 6 plane

could a law designed to increase road safety actually make driving more dangerous." • A pepper spray that is popular with hikers in Alaska for

Times.

love tor us to use detailed birth

ed Brinks guards delivering currency to a bank office. After making off with $1.17 million, the robbers again eluded multiple checkpoints and security guards. Before leaving the building, however, they removed their masks, enabling security cameras to film them. The suspects were quickly apprehended after the news media showed their faces, and police received more ^

n m n l e claiming

"Me and unBill Stout told the Associated

» The New York Times reported

four have been a b d u c t e d because

that the crew o f the Marine C o r p s

o f i n f o r m a t i o n that m a y have

jet which hit a ski lift in northern

c o m e f r o m published birth

Italy in February, killing 2 0 peo-

noticcs. All four babies were safely

ple; relied o n a U . S . military m a p

recovered.

that did n o t depict the ski-1 i ft

• A growing n u m b e r o f newspa-

cable, even though an Italian mili-

pers are charging m o n e y to publish

tary map provided to the crews

obituaries, according to

c o m m a n d e r s a n d ordinary road

& World Report, which noted that

m a p s clearly showed the ski lift,

deaths previously reported by obit-

U.S. News

which was built 31 years ago. T h e

uary writers are n o w handled by

Pentagon said its policy is not to

classified-ad salespeople, w h o

use m a p s jmade b y foreign coun-

charge according to length. T h e

tries.

. trend b e g a n in the 1980s, accordj n g t o l b n d a ^

Lite & Death birth notices result to local the persuasive efforts of the

i s s g s s w

insists • . such announcements endanger its pn-

What's

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DEAN N O T SMELLING LIKE ROSES

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Re: Peter Freyne's statement in Inside Track (April 15) that Governor Dean "came off smelling like a rose" by announcing a plan to add 4 6 more empolyees to the Corrections Department in response to the latest furlough-escapee debacle. It ain't roses I'm smelling. If being Governor is supposed to entail taking responsibility and offering leadership, then Howard Dean is sadly lacking. I mean, how often do we have to turn on the evening news only to hear about another furlough or house arrest escape by an individual "presumed to be dangerous?" Here's a clue, guys: If they're presumed to be dangerous, what the hell are they doing out of jail? Brian Barcomb, a felon with a lengthy criminal record, was sentencd in 1992 to a prison term of 12 to 30 years for armed robbery. What was he doing out of jail in less than six years? Forget "truth in sentencing;" how about "remotely related to reality" in sentencing? As for the Governor's other brilliant remedy — administering psychological tests to prisoners in order to determine which ones are fit to be

HHBHv

released — why not save the State both time and money and just read their rap sheets? If the Governor actually had an

mIimmw

iota of interest in this problem (one

must assume he's waiting for our very own Willie Horton before becoming so engaged), he would tell the Department of Corrections that if there's not enough room, to house violent criminals, then release the prisoners who are not violent criminals. And if in fact there's still not enough room, then the Governor ought to bite the bullet and propose that we build sufficient jail space.

— David Don Burlington

T H A N K YOU, T H A N K YOU, T H A N K YOU Today as I was enjoying the latest issue of Seven Days, I realized that I've yet to express adequately to you all just how much I treasure your publication. Wednesdays just never seem to come soon enough for me. As soon as I can tear into the latest issue, I quickly flip over to "Sound Advice" to get the skinny on what's going on in our crucial music scene,

backtrack to Peter Freyne's "Inside Track" to see what commotion he's causing now, peruse "The Straight Dope"...search for "Dykes to Watch Out For"...try to see if I recognize the letter writer for "Ask Lola the Love Counselor," and then proceed through the rest of the paper in somewhat of a more orderly fashion. Just when I thought Seven Days couldn't get any better, along come Marc Awodey's art reviews. Now, I've always appreciated Seven Days' faithful attention to the Vermont art scene, but Awodey's columns are the first I've read that make me think, "Whoa — I'd better go see this damn show!"... To the publishers and staff of Seven Days I give my thanks for such consistent and enlightening high quality. Your hard work makes my life far the richer.

— Nathaniel Orshan Burlington

TRAIL A N D ERROR A citizen juror lays down the law

page 7

By Ruth Horowitz

'A' FOR ARCHITECTURE A new library at Champlain

College gets a nod from the

By Kevin J. Kelley

page 13

NO PLACE LIKE HOME Book Review: Philip Baruth's T h e Dream of the White Village

By Peter Kurth

FREE SPEECH! When security confiscated a co-ed's banner at St. Michael's College reading "Sanctions = Murder" (whether you agree or not is irrelevant), Secretary of State Albright should have stepped up and declared: "No, leave it. Free speech!" The applause may have been stunning.

— John Cunavelis

neighborhood

page 15

OUTDOORS: THEY SHOOT PICKEREL, DON'T THEY? An old tradition

is passing for reel

Vermonters

By David Healy

page 27

Burlington

CELL D I V I S I O N

HOWARD OWNS T H E G U T T E R Allow me to "Blow the Whistle" on violence against women, as your 2/3-page ad exhorts us to do, whilst running an article by Melanie Menagh on that ultimate upholder of human dignity, Howard Stern (April 8). This reminds me of a Boston Phoenix from the mid-eighties that was sold with a condom on the front page, and scores of ads in the back, after the harrowing A I D S articles, ISO (in search of), uh, high-risk behavior. How much lower can we go, as our country continues to gyrate to its perverse limbo? Are we suffering from an overabundance of taste, morality and manners? Are there orifi yet to pierce, morals yet to spit on, narcissistic heights yet to scale? A brief walk across the "4th most livable city" gave me an answer. Yes, sex is fun, people are horny, and puerile humor may make us laugh, but isn't it more enriching and life-affirming to follow an unending quest for knowledge, loving kindness and God-hood! Stern perpetuates and celebrates humans, especially women, as pieces of meat, face it. Ms. Menagh, don't fear defining morals; without a moral code, descended from God, we are no more than amorphous ids. As Rush Limbaugh put it, Howard shot for the gutter, and he owns it.

— Martin Fuller Jericho

Letten Policy: SEVEN DAYS wants your rants and raves, in 250 words

Art Review: Karin

Weiner

page 28

By Marc Awodey . .

departments news q u i r k s wee k 1 y ma i 1 exposure s t r a i g h t dope inside track crank c a l l sound a d v i c e calendar a r t 1 i s t i ngs talking pictures crossword puzzle troubletown v i d i o t savant l i f e in hell classifieds g r e e t i n g s from dug nap dykes t o watch out f o r wellness directory h e a l t h q&a real a s t r o l o g y personals T o l a , the l o v e c o u n s e l o r

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SEVEN DAYS. S w e a r on a stack of p a n c a k e s . COVER DESIGN BY SAMANTHA HUNT.

3pr i 1

2 2,

1998

SEVEN DAYS

ILLUSTRATION

BY GARY CAUSER.

page

• .

J - .

G E T

N T -

H A V E

C l a s s e s R u n A p r i l 27 - J u n e 14

Registration begins April

DANCE Child's Creative Dance Ages 3-5 yrs. explore movement and the elements of dance, developing coordination, body awareness, creativity and rhythm. Tues. 2:45 - 3:15pm. April 28 - June 2 $28 ($20) Ballroom Dance Classes in Shelburne and at the First Congregational Church in Essex. Call 862-9622 for information.

(Member fees in parentheses)

AEROBIC/ & FITNE/J Get a Y M C A Aerobic Class Pass and attend any of 30 classes each week, including Step, Aerobic Blast, Funk and Circuit Training. Includes aerobic classes at the Y M C A at Essex. 7 weeks for $65. Y o g a Experience the physical and mental benefits of global yoga, a system that teaches relaxation techniques to use in your daily life. Increase your strength, flexibility and balance. Thursdays, 6:15-7:15 pm. $56 ($45) N E W Phvsical-Mind Class (formerly Pilates). Strengthen each muscle group as a unit with attention to breath and proper position. Aids in alignment, flexibility and tone. Sat. 4:30-5:30 pm, May 2 June 6. $38 ($28) Weight Loss Thru Weight Training The latest strengthtraining techniques combined with aerobic activities, support and supervision. Mon/Wed/Fri, 7 - 8 pm. $72. ($48)

At The Y M C A at Essex Five Corners Step Aerobics: Mon/Wed., 5:30-6:30 pm $44. Low-Impact Aerobics: Tue/Thu, 6:10-7 pm $44

At Memorial Hall in Essex Phvsical-Mind Class (see desription above): Tuesdays, 6 - 7 pm, April 28 - May 26. $34.

At the Richmond Elementary School Low-lmoact Aerobics: Tue/Thu., 6:30 - 7:30 pm, April 28 - June 4. $48 Yoga: Mondays, 6:30 - 7:30 pm. April 27 - June 8, $42

PRENATAL Prenatal Water Exercise For pregnant and postpartum women, this program includes safe exercises to relieve lower back pain and swelling, as well as maintain muscle tone and increase circulation. Mon/Wed. 7 - 8 pm. $52. ($37)

p a g e

F U 1 V ! 16

uneven bars, rings and tumbling. Thursdays, 3 - 4 pm and Sat, 10:15 -11:05 am. $42. ($22) Tumble and Splash Back-to-back creative movement & tumbling and swim class. Ages 2 - 3, with parent. Tues, 9 - 9:55 am. $58 ($40). Sat, 11 am-Noon. $48($36). Ages 3 - 5, without parent. Sat, 11:30am-12:30 pm. $54. ($44)

know where he was, what he took or why he was really calling; did, only to find two nine-inch back in the tub immediately,

ACTIVE OLDER ADULT/ Silver Foxes A moderatelypaced, co-ed exercise class for those over 50. Socialize and exercise to improve cardiovascular fitness, muscle tone, joint flexibility and overall mobility. Includes land exercise followed by optional water exercise. Mon/Wed /Fri, 8 - 9:30 am. Gym only, ends at 8:50 am, $54. ($42) Both gym and pool, $63. ($48) Never-Too-Late-Nautilus Strength training for folks over 50. Follow a personalized program to improve strength and energy levels, ease arthritis pain build strong bones. Tue/Fri, 9 -10am. $42. ($28)

YOUTH /PORT/ (No classes Sat, June 13.) Little Gvmies 12 - 36 mos, with parent. Children grow physically and socially through music, games and exploration of hoops, balls, parachute, and balance beam. Sat, 9:05- 9:35 am. $30 ($18) Tinv Tumblers 4 - 5 years, with parent. Explore tumbling and movement through use of balance beam, uneven bars, rings, balls and hoops. Sat, 9:40-10:10 am. $30. ($18) Beginner Gymnastics 6 - 1 2 yrs., grouped by ability. Skill development includes use of balance beam, vault,

slits on his lower back. She told him to get and they sent a rescue team over. They

his kidneys were stolen. They are worth $10,000

each on the black

found market.

— MLS cola, via

MARTIAL ART/ Kids in Karate Children ages 7 and up, adults welcome. Emphasizes development of endurance, coordin-ation, strength St flexibility. Tue, 4 -5:15, Thu, 4:05-5:15 pm. $56. ($42) Tai Chi Push Hands Two people work together to perform fluid moves which mimic combat. Speed of moves vary by ability. Tue/ Thur 6:05-6:55am, $56 ($42). Kickboxing Basics: Adults learn the fundamentals of kickboxing in a noncompetitive environment, Increase eye/hand coordination, balance, agility and flexibility while learning selfdefense. Tue/Thu, 7 - 8 pm. $56 ($42) At The Y M C A at Essex, Tue/Thu, 7 - 8:30 pm.

She

advised him to get out of the tub and look himself over in the minor.

/WIM LE//ON/ The Y M C A offers swim lessons for people of all ages. For information on times and fees, please call 862-9622. Classes include parent/child classes for ages 6 months to 5 years, classes for independent swimmers ages 3 - 5 years, youth swim classes for ages six and older, teen swim lessons and adult lessons.

WATER FITNE// Splash & Tone Low-impact workout focuses on tension release, strengthening, flexibility, toning and endurance. Tue/Thur, 9 - 1 0 am. $52. (Free) Tue/Thur, 6:30 7:30 pm. $52($37) Water Aerobics A fast-paced aerobic workout designed to increase cardiovascular strength and endurance. Mon/Wed. 6 - 7 pm. $52. ($37) Mon/Wed/Fri. 6:15 - 7:15 am. $69 (Free). Arthritis Exercise In collaboration with the Arthritis Foundation, we provide the opportunity for those with arthritis or similar ailments to participate in a recreational group activity. Gentle exercises in our 86° pool help decrease pain and stiffness. Attend any of these classes for $59 ($37): Mon -Fri. 1-2 pm, Tue/Thu. 8 - 9 am. Financial assistance is available to those in need for YMCA programs and memberships.

YMCA We build strong kids, strong families, strong communities.

266 College St. Burlington Call 862-9622 to register!

SEVEN DAYS

AOL

Dozens of folks have written me about this over the past few years, M. Initially I thought, Well, at least now we know where they found the people for the first O.J. jury. Who could possibly believe this absurd urban legend, especially given the number of times its been debunked in the media? Then again, you did write to me first, instead of spamming the story to everybody you know via e-mail, as many people do. Regarding the latter crowd, while I don't wish to be critical in any way, I've seen smarter life forms crawling on the side of a toilet tank. The facts: (1) There are no d o c u m e n t e d cases o f kidneynapping, or for that matter any killing, abduction or mutilation for purposes of organ theft. T h e National Kidney Foundation, which fears this persistent myth will scare o f f donors, has asked victims o f organ theft to step forward. S o far, no takers. (2) While I suppose it's possible to remove somebody's kidneys with a paper plate a n d an X - a c t o knife, as a practical matter it c a n t b e done. T h e operation customarily takes a five-person surgical team working for three or four hours in a sterile operating r o o m . M u c h o f the e q u i p m e n t required (anesthesia machines, operating tables) is bulky a n d not the sort o f thing you could readily sneak into an apartment, hotel room, etc. T h e tissue and blood types o f the donor and d o n e e must be precisely matched; you can't just grab the first m o p e you see in a bar.

(See folklorist J a n H a r o l d Brunvand's 1! Other Lusty Urban Legends.) It m a y hav<

'wsfM.

WMi

mm W&

1THE STORY OF RUTH

| Let's hear it for democracy, folks! Just when I you thought the cast of characters entered in J the Vermont's 1998 electoral sweepstakes could8 n't get any better, entering from stage right — 1 the one and only Ruth Dwyer — and she | wants the whole enchilada. | "Howard Dean needs to rest up," Dwyer „ tells Inside Track. "After the pri8 mary he's going to have a lot to I do," promises the Republican | state rep from Thetford. "So | we'll give him this opportunity « to relax and think about ® Vermont issues. That'll be 1 unusual for him, because he's | been thinking about other | issues," notes Ruth in reference I to Ho-Ho's aborted presidential ® quest. "The fact that he wasn't I paying attention to Vermont for | at least the last four years will | come back to haunt him." | Why? "Because," she replies, "I 8 think that while the cat's away 1 the mice will play. I think that | someone who knows the state | budget as well as I do will be 1 able to point out some areas ® where it shows." Oh, boy. Get 1 ready for Mighty Mouse! | Ruth Dwyer turns 40 on | Saturday. She's wrapping up her I Statehouse career after just two terms. If she's ® back in January, it'll be to take the oath of 1 office as Vermont's chief executive. | Home is a lovely Thetford farm. Her hub| bie, Dr. Dwyer, is a vet. Ruth gives riding I lessons and trains horses. In four years under ® the golden dome, no one's ever been able to * train her. Never even come close. Ruth Dwyer | does things her way. And her way's the right | way. Since she's always right, Dwyer is known | for her "my way or the highway" style of polii tics. She walks fast and talks fast, and she claims " the media "ignores" her. I Fact is, Ruth Dwyer is impossible to ignore. | Her style is aggressive. Her politics are conservative. And right off the bat — without being asked — she denies she's an "extremist." "People will try to portray me that way," she cautions, sensing the campaign trail ahead of her. "I'm fairly aggressive," she concedes. Some would call it "in your face." And there's no shortage of people in the building who'll tell ya she's burned every bridge in sight. Four years ago, as a Republican freshman, she backed Michael Obuchowski in his hardfought race for speaker with Peter Mallary. Mallary carried the Rs, but the R from Thetford cut a deal with Obie, and Obie paid her right back with a seat on the appropriations committee. There she proceeded to claim the mantle of "resident expert" on the Vermont state budget. So much of an expert was she that two years later Obie yanked her know-it-allness. He reassigned Demon Dwyer to the commerce committee. "When you tell the truth," says Dwyer of her banishment from the House budget writing panel, "you're usually put in a place where you're not likely to do it again." Well, Ruth "The Truth" Dwyer has decided to do it again. This time on a statewide level. The people of Vermont are ready for the facts," insists Ruth. "They're ready for the truth." Everybody better hang on tight, especially Bernie Rome, her Republican primary opponent. Petula Clark Fan Club News — "When you're alone and life is making you lonely, you can always go.. .downtown! When you've got worries all the noise and the hurry seems to help I know... downtown!" It was the crystal voice of Petula Clark coming ever so softly out of the tiny speaker on the city assessor's laptop at mm apri 1

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Monday's little victory celebration in Mayor Peter Clavelle's office. The few present who recalled the 1965 #1 hit chimed in. Molly Lambert was one of them. Molly's the can-do commander of the Church Street Marketplace, that great wide walkway of urban Vermont. Clavelle knows the words, too, but he couldn't be there. Our globe-trotting mayor is on vacation with the family in South Korea, the homeland of his daughter. But Mayor Moonie was definitely there in spirit. The long-dreamed-of anchor department store for downtown Burlap is so close now you can taste it. This season in Montpelier, Vermont's cities — tiny as they may be by non-Vermont standards — won access to a freshly designed trough of state funding. Burlington is at the head of the food chain. And looking at the rule book, folks, it sure looks like the little parking garage problem on the Filene's • project ain't a problem anymore. • mu Can you say Filene's by m I Christmas 1999? Downtown w ^ J b L saved! A department store for the new millennium and a statewide political launching pad for Peter Clavelle? Alan Yandow, Burlap's new lobbyist under the golden dome this year, cut the cake Monday afternoon. Something very chocolate from Mirabelle's that Brendan Keleher, the treasurer, bought. Yandow is a softspoken hometown boy who's toiled for the city's light department since 1980. This winter Alan really glowed. You see, for many years, Clavelle and, ergo, the city have bonded with the high-powered Statehouse lobbying firm, Kimbell Sherman & Ellis. They're three business bears for hire who also hustle for GMP, Philip Morris and Cigna Insurance, among others. This year, Clavelle finally decided not to renew their contract as Statehouse representatives of the People's Republic. Moonie saved a chunk of change. Went in-house and signed up a guy already on the city payroll. Not that it wasn't a team effort. Clavelle and 1 City Attorney Joe McNeil made the appropriate appearances before key committees. Ken Schatz did the legal research through each transformation of the bill. Sheri Larsen, lobbyist for the Lake Champlain Regional Chamber of Commerce (the Wayne Roberts' Chamber), carried water at the Statehouse. So did Paul Bruhn of the Preservation Trust. And let's not forget our favorite former presidential candidate who lives in Burlington's South End, Gov. Howard Dean. Ho-Ho was on this train from the get-go, and Commissioner 1 Barb Grimes made sure everyone knew it. In the House, Rep. Karen Lafayette cracked the whip. Over on the senate side, Susan Bardett of general affairs, Dick Mazza of transportation, as well as Jan Backus and Peter Brownell, did their bits. And the chair of the Senate Finance Committee, Cheryl Rivers, was key. She told Inside Track that it made a big difference to her that Yandow — rather than The Three Bears — was Burlington's lobbyist. Rivers says she backed the Downtown Bill with passion, because it'll breathe life into a host of Vermont downtowns from Brattleboro to St. Albans, Middlebury to St. Jay. Vermont's ski areas and covered bridges are doing fine. But Vermont's downtowns are in critical condition, with their commercial lifeblood being sucked out by suburban sprawl and the big-box stores in the cornfields. Now, the much-needed transfusion has begun. ®

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• I ell, no good deed goes unpunished, as Clare Boothe Luce | A | once said. Some weeks ago, commenting on the death of a F 1 great woman journalist, Martha Gellhorn, I asked women readers of Seven Days to let me know who their heroes are. We live in an age where heroes are scarce, it seems to me, whether they're male or female. I write about women frequently and admire them more than people think, so you can imagine my surprise when I opened the first of a dozen letters and took # 11 1 If it right on the chin fl ||$f Of from D . D . TaylorGarci'a of Middlebury. "Peter," she began, with the blanket familI I iarity endemic to our Jflgfl f ^QU 0 •••win •• time: Deep shame on you for not thinking hard before [your] obnoxious blatherings." Ms. Taylor-Garcia didn't explain her objections to my column more specifically than that, but she was only one in a string of wrathful dames who've apparently put me right up there with Rush f':! Limbaugh as a despicable misogynist. A misogynist is someone (not necessarily a man) who hates and distrusts women, which I certainly do not. There seems to be some confusion here between pointed criticism and outright contempt. Ms. Taylor-Garcfa seemed like Little Mary Sunshine, however, next to Kimberly Ciano, who didn't give her address when she wrote: "Re: The lack of'women of achievement' in the slutfilled world of today. People who say [write] stupid things just to get a reaction out of other people are pathetic. Your entire article offended me so badly, I will not even honor it with the time it would need for a thorough criticism."

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She then went on to run me through with her epistolary sword. "There is enough mindless, sexist rambling out there without your addition to the dung-heap. Please put away your pen and get over yourself...You are disgusting and pompous. I hope I never see your name in print again." Well, Ms. Ciano — or should I say, " Well!"— if you're reading this, you're out of luck. I hate to think that I've ruined your day just by signing my name, but if it's any comfort to you, I've been called worse. On to cooler heads. The delightful Barbara Murphy, President of Community College of Vermont, nominated poet and Vermont resident Grace Paley as her choice for "personal heroine: gritty and funny and clear-eyed. She offers her writing like she offers her activist life — from the heart and hoping it will matter." Ms. Murphy also mentioned Marian Wright Edelman, founder of the Children's Defense Fund, former Texas Governor Ann Richards ("in the big-hair department?") and playwright and performer Anna Deveare Smith as candidates for national acclaim. Carol DeForest o f Richmond wrote to recommend the late zoologist Dian Fossey, whose pioneering work in studying and protecting mountain gorillas in Rwanda inspired the book and movie, Gorillas in the Mist. Anyone who knows about Fossey knows that she was murder to get along with — indeed, she was murdered in 1985 — which only proves that in order to get something done you can't be afraid to make enemies. "She made a difference," says Ms. DeForest, "had a vision, and did something about it. No, she wasn't glamorous, or rich* or famous. (I Continued on page 18

Backtalk" will return next week. a p ri1

2 2,

199

Ruth

Horowitz

ury Panel D had reached its last verdict. We took our assigned seats in the jury box, declared the defendant guilty of domestic assault, were thanked for our service, and filed out of Chittenden District Court. Back in the jury room, we gathered our belongings and said our goodbyes. It was an emotional moment. Many of us had sat for six or seven trials together over the last three months. We'd developed friendships and picked up a private language of in-jokes and courthouse jargon. And though we hadn't drawn any "big" cases — no rapes or murders — we had hashed out hard deliberations that had changed people's lives. O f the seven defendants whose cases we'd considered, we had acquitted one and found six guilty. "We should get T-shirts,"

april

22,

1998

someone joked in an embarrassed attempt at closure. "They could say, Jury Panel D: We've got convictions." Unlike most states, where jury duty is a quick in-and-out affair, Vermont demands a long-term commitment. Why? "It's a holdover from a time when it was difficult to find people and difficult to travel," explains Montpelier attorney and legal historian Paul Gillies. But the system has definite drawbacks, says Geoff Crawford, an attorney who tries civil cases in Burlington. "I don't think anyone thinks it's a plus, except that it's economical, and mechanically easier." Juries are like fish, Crawford suggests. After they've been around for awhile, they tend to get a little funky. "The first trial is really stimulating. By the sixth time they're thinking about everything except what they're supposed to be concen-

trating on," he says. I was soon to learn this first-hand.

he panel that matriculated in January was a wideeyed sampling of citizenry, including a bus driver, a waitress, a martial arts instructor, a writer. Our first order of business was an orientation from the judge. Carefully and patiently, he steered us through the high points of the American judicial system, breathing life into familiar phrases we'd never really considered: presumption of innocence, burden of proof, reasonable doubt. "He makes me feel so patriotic," someone whispered when the judge was done. The next event was voire dire, a monthly procedure which assigned us to specific trials. The judge and lawyers

SEVEN DAYS

on 1-89. What the prosecutor called "road rage," the defense attorney described as selfdefense. What would we do, he asked, if we were driving along and a vehicle pulled in front of us, blocking our path and braking to a crawl? Had any of us, he wondered, ever had any encounters with the Super Hogs motorcycle club? "Some of the alleged victims," he said, "are members of this group." We arrived at the trial picturing bad-ass bikers bullying a vulnerable civilian. But as it turned out, this particular incident hadn't involved a single motorcycle. The phrase "Super Hogs" never even came up in the course of the trial. It did, however, come up quite a bit in our deliberations. If this attorney had tried to prejudice us with irrelevant insinuations about motorcycles, we grumbled, how else were we being manipulated? We kept that in mind in the next case that defender tried before us. As our term wore on, we collected and recalled a growing record of legal hits and misses: The prosecutor who all but climbed into the jury box while examining a witness seemed to be speaking for our benefit. The defender who aggressively cross-examined a mentally disabled kid made us want to cry foul. Ace attorneys could turn testimony into a good story. Others lacked that Perry Mason knack. In one case, we listened to the prosecutor struggle through his examination, trying to reconstruct the events leading up to the alleged crime. The effect was almost painful, like stumbling through a dark house with paper bags over our hands. Then the defense attorney cross-examined the same witness, and the story fell into place: a wedding, too much to drink, someone slipping down a staircase, someone else passed threw us questions that would out in a pool of vomit, an illicit help them — and us — learn flirtation, furious shouts, flailwho was who on the panel: ing arms, and a possible blow who played on the police hock— but no one who would ey team, who opposed drug admit to witnessing any actual laws, whose friend had been assault. It took us 10 minutes killed by a drunk driver. In to acquit. time, we realized that some In another painful case, we attorneys also used voire dire to watched the defense's entire lay groundwork for the case case evaporate. Again and itself. again, the defender broached a Once, this ploy backfired. The charge was simple assault — pointing a gun at a person Continued on next page

The story fell

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question, the prosecutor objected, and the judge sustained the objection. After each sustained objection, the defender's shoulders sagged a little lower, her voice dropped another decibel. In both cases, we not only drew conclusions about the facts, but also formed lasting opinions of the lawyers who presented them. "You go in front of a panel with a terrible case," complains Rob Backus, a Burlington public defender. "Next time you go before that panel, they won't believe you. I don't think that's particularly fair." e were supposed to be juries of peers. But we didn't feel like we had much in common with the sad, disordered folks who came before us. We heard about sisters who wouldn't speak to each other, men who couldn't control their tempers, women who feared for their children's safety, a grandmother who couldn't read or write, a man who claimed he couldn't count backwards, another who was convinced two wrongs make a right, and all sorts of people who drank much too much.

After one late-night guilty verdict, the defendant's body shook and his face twisted with

Going into our third month, we knew who was most likely to convict and who preferred to acquit. We knew who mouthed off and who kept quiet; who liked to study the written instructions, who based opinions on body language, and who drew on examples from "L.A. Law." tears. Confiding that the accused came from a "lively clan," our court officer steered us around the back of the building and saw us to our cars. We walked shoulder to shoulder and kept a nervous eye out for trouble. And though nothing untoward happened, that shared sense of danger pulled us closer together — and helped distance us from future defendants. As we jurymates grew more familiar, we felt freer to show

"Wrong way?" "What's the problem officer?

"Didn't you see the arrow?"

"You're going the wrong way" she said. "Arrow? I didn't even see the Indian."

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DOING YOUR DUTY No question, jury duty is an imposition, says Burlington attorney Geoff Crawford. "If I were to call you up and say, 'could you take a week off to help me out at my house?' you'd say, 'I love you dearly, but I just can't do it.' But that's what the state does." Each year, a Chittenden County Superior Court computer extracts 1600 random names from DMV and voterregistration files. A clerk sends out questionnaires to eliminate ineligibles: noncitizens, folks who can't read and write English, and convicted felons. Superior Court, District Court and Grand Jury panels are randomly selected from this

pared-down master list. Certain types of people used to be exempt, including doctors, lawyers and teachers. But when it got so that just about the only jurors were retirees and unemployed people, automatic exemptions ended. Today, it's nearly impossible to avoid service altogether, though courts do try to accommodate specific schedules. Employers aren't required to pay for jury duty, and jurors who don't receive this benefit can get up to $30 a day - a measly $5 per hour for up to six hours, and nothing for overtime - from the state. Fail to show up, and you can be charged with contempt of court and face a minimum fine of $50. Serve on a panel, and you're exempt for the next two years. — R.H.

our true colors. During almost every deliberation, the same juror would sigh, "This is a person who's made a lot of bad choices," while another would ask, "Can we recommend counseling?" In our second month, a defendant was accused of going to the apartment where his exgirlfriend was in bed with another man, banging on the windows, and threatening to slit their throats. Before we convicted, one juror called the victim "white trash." Another observed, "He must have been banging pretty loud to distract them — unless she's a lousy lay." One juror confided to me that when we took straw polls before beginning to deliberate, he liked to vote the opposite of what he really thought. That way, he could pretend to reconsider later and persuade others to do the same. "I love jury duty," he happily confessed. " D o you know how good it is for my ego to make people to change their opinions?" In fact, we were all learning to play the game — and each other. Going into our third month, we knew who was most likely to convict and who preferred to acquit. We knew who mouthed off and who kept quiet; who liked to study the written instructions, who based

opinions on body language, and who drew on examples from "L.A. Law" and trials we'd previously heard. In short, we'd become the sort of panel lawyers like Crawford dread. Experienced jurors, he says, get to "feel like semi-pros who can play the game better than the lawyers and judges."

Juries are like fish, suggests attorney Geoff Crawford. After they have been around for awhile, they tend to get a little funky. We'd matured from naive freshmen to sophisticated seniors. But did this change our decisions? Backus believes that seasoned panels acquit less often. "It stops bothering them to convict people," he says. "They don't take the consequences as seriously."

At our last trial, we entered the jury room evenly split. But I eventually found myself one of the last two jurors still advocating "not guilty." All the evidence pointed to guilt, but I wasn't entirely certain. Then it came to me that I was hoping to acquit because I'd been on so many juries that had convicted; I was bothered by the fact that this was my last chance to balance out my personal record. Once I realized what I was doing, I could no longer imagine any reasonable scenario that would exonerate the defendant. As it turns out, our panel was not unusually blood-thirsty or vengeful. Judicial Statistics show that our 85 percent conviction rate is right in line with all verdicts reached by juries in Chittenden County last year. But the fact that this question even came up — that we were seeing trials as pieces in a pattern, rather than just considering them on a case-by-case basis — is troubling. Lawyers gripe that the system is flawed, but is anyone trying to change it? When my term ended, I didn't take home a commemorative T-shirt; I came away with a reasonable doubt about whether Vermont's traditional system for seating juries still makes sense. <Z>

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far as we know, for the most shows played in a year 382! It must be the Jamaican-seasoned punk-pop that keeps 'em going. Expert a full-throttle ho-down from guys funny enough to break into a Twisted Sister cover and caustic enough to name a song "Fuck You and Your Cat." (Hey, animal lovers, chill; I'm sure they did n't mean it.) With the ska-ful Wank and Showoff at Toast this Thursday.

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the '80s to the dancehall diggers o f the '90s, courtesy of W R U V (90.1 FM), the Vermont Reggae Festival, Flex Records, and a mess of righteous deejays. This Friday, Metronome turns into a steamy skankin' Bashment Dance Contest, Jamaican stylee, with Twice Massive — that's the double-barreled

sound systems of Flextone Hi Fi and Mas Fuerte, Continued

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A N D T H E

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(punk, indie), 242 Main, 6 p.m. $3. ADELE NICOLS & TOM (acoustic), Dubie's Cafe, 8 p.m. N C . HELICOPTER (freak-

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Higher Ground, Winooski, 8 p.m. Sold out. M A R K BRISSON (acoustic), Cheers, 9 p.m. N C . THE CHARLIE-O S HOUSE BAND (improv music w/Brandon Klarich & Adam Woogmaster), Charlie O's, Montpelier, 10 p.m. N C .

THURSDAY

$2. ELLEN POWELL & TOM CLEARY (jazz) Leunig's, 8:30 p.m. N C . AARON FLINN (pop), Sweetwaters, 8 p.m. N C . BARBACOA (surf & spy), Red Square, 9 p.m. N C . SMOKIN' GUN (rock), Nectars, 9:30 p.m. N C . TRAIN WRECK (blues/rock), Cherry Street Billiards, 9 p.m. N C . WIDE WAIL (alt-rock), Manhattan Pizza, 10 p.m. N C . GOLDFINGER, WANK, SHOWOFF (ska-punk), Club Toast, 9:30

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Trackside Tavern, Winooski, 9 p.m. N C . PICTURE THIS (jazz), Tavern at Inn at Essex, 8 p.m. N C . KARAOKE, Edgewater Pub, Colchester, 9 p.m. N C . DANCE PARTY (DJ), Cheers Nightclub, 9 p.m. N C . GUY COLASACCO (singer-songwriter), Jake's, 6:30 p.m. N C . COMEDY NIGHT, Rude D o g Tavern, Vergennes, 9 p.m. N C . TNT (DJ & karaoke), Thirsty Turtle, Waterbury, 9 p.m.

FRIDAY

CLYDE STATS TRIO (jazz), Windjammer, 5 p.m. NC. JOE BURLINGTONITIS W/SYRUP USA, THE FAN MODINE, SARGE, WICKED FARLEYS, L0CKGR00VE, (indie-fest), 2 4 2 Main, 8 p.m. $5.

CHRISTIAN BAUMAN, RACHEL BISSEX, GREGG CAGNO, LINDA SHARAR (contemporary folk), Burlington Coffeehouse at Rhombus, 8 p.m. $6. PERRY NUNN (acoustic), Ruben James, 5 p.m. N C , followed by DJ NIGHT, 9 p.m. N C . BOOTLESS & UNHORSED (Irish), Last Chance, 7:30 p.m. N C . JAMES HARVEY (jazz piano), Red Square, 9 p.m. N C . AERIUS (DJ Craig Mitchell), 135 Pearl, 9 p.m. $5. SPILL, STOCKLAN, 27 DOWN (modern rock; Spill C D release party), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $3/5. REGGAE DANCE CONTEST ($300 first prize), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. $5-

DOG CATCHERS (rock), Nectar's, 9:30 p.m. NC. JAZZ QUARTET, Manhattan Pizza, 10 p.m. NC. DERRICK SEMLER TRIO (blues), Vermont Pub & Brewery, 10 p.m. N C . COMEDY ZONE (stand-up), Radisson Hotel, 8 & 10 p.m. $7.

ABAIR BROS, (rock), Franny O's, 9:30 p.m. NC. DANCE PARTY (DJ), Cheers Nightclub, 9 p.m. N C . THE MCCIENATHANS (rock), Patches Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC.

Metronome, 9 p.m. $3. OPEN MIKE W/D. DAVIS, Cactus

WALT ELMORE & ALL THAT JAZZ, Tuckaway's, Sheraton Hotel,

Cafe, 9 p.m. N C . ROCKIN' DADDYS (rock), Vermont Pub & Brewery, 10 p.m. N C . JUSAGROOVE (disco), Higher Ground, Winooski, 9 p.m. $5. DAVE ABAIR TRIO, (rock),

p.m. NC. THE THROBULATORS, STARLINE RHYTHM BOYS (rocka-

StV'Etf D A Y S

9 p.m. N C . RICK THOMAS (acoustic), Ground Round, 8 billy, hillbilly boogie), Higher Ground, Winooski, 9

april

'22,

1998

advice p.m. $3. SAND BLIZZARD (rock), Trackside Tavern, Winooski, 9 p.m. $2. S M O K I N ' G U N (rock), Edgewater Pub, Colchester, 9 p.m. N C . DJ NIGHT (Dr. E), Clover House Pub, Colchester, 9 p.m. N C . JOHN CASSEL (jazz piano), Tavern at the Inn at Essex, 8 p.m. N C . DANCIN' DEAN (country dance & instruction), Cobbweb, Milton, 7:30 p.m. $5. LIVE JAZZ, Diamond Jim's Grille, St. Albans, 7:30 p.m. N C . MICHELLE LALIBERTE (French cabaret), Chow! Bella, St. Albans, 8:30 p.m. N C . JIMMY T & THE COBRAS (rock), Thirsty Turtle,

Waterbury, 9 p.m. NC. WILLIE B. EDWARDS (blues/r&b), Charlie O's, Montpelier, 9 p.m. $4. JUKEBOX HEROES (rock), Legends, Montpelier, 9 p.m. $4. DAYVE HUCKETT & DAVE WHITTLE (acoustic), Cafe 0\6, Chelsea, 8 p.m. Donations. EAST COAST MUSCLE (rock), Rude Dog

Tavern, Vergennes, 9 p.m. NC. JOHNNY DEVIL BAND

(rock), Swany's, Vergennes, 9 p.m. N C . NEW NILE ORCHESTRA (African pop), Vergennes Opera House, 8 p.m. $7. SETH YACOVONE (blues), Knights of Columbus Hall, Middlebury, 8 p.m. $7.

MICHAEL BUCCELLATO, TIM POLLAC (acoustic), Greatful Bread Deli, Essex, noon. Donations. DANCE PARTY (DJ),

Cheers Nightclub, 9 p.m. NC. EAST COAST MUSCLE

(rock), Rude Dog Tavern, Vergennes, 9 p.m. N C .

JOHNNY DEVIL BAND (rock), Swany's, Vergennes, 9 p.m. N C . SANDRA WRIGHT (blues), Thirsty Turtle, Waterbury,

S O L D O U T• T H A N K

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BRODIE (acoustic), Boony's, Franklin, 7 p.m. N C .

VERMONT'S OWN AWARD-WINNING

SUNDAY

ELLEN POWELL & JERRY LAVENE (jazz), Windjammer, 11 a.m. NC. SANDRA WRIGHT, TAMMY FLETCHER, CHRISTINE ADLER & KIP MEAKER (gospel brunch), Red Square, 11 a.m. & 1

p.m. $12.95 w/bmnch. BURLINGTONITUS W/MY OWN SWEET, VICTORY AT SEA, THE SWIMMER, STUPID CLUB, JUMPROPE (indiefest), Club Metronome, 6 p.m. $5. COOL RULES (rock), Nectars, 9:30 p.m. N C . TNT (karaoke & DJ), Thirsty

Turtle, Waterbury, 8 p.m. NC. MARK LEGRAND & SARAH

Montpelier, 11 a.m. NC. JOHN DREW PETERSEN &

hardcore, punk, alt-rock), 2 4 2 Main, 7 p.m. $5. BOOTLESS & UNHORSED (Irish), Last Chance, 7:30 p.m. NC. DOG CATCHERS (rock), Nectar's, 9:30 p.m. N C . LIT-

MARYELLEH MUNDY (acoustic), Middlebury Coffeehouse, 7 p.m. N C .

(singer-songwriter), Burlington Coffeehouse at Rhombus, 8 p.m. $6. ADELE NICOLS (jazz vocals), Red Square, 9 p.m. N C . DJ NIGHT, Ruben James, 9 p.m.

BEN SWIFT BAND (rock), Nectar's, 9:30 p.m. NC. ELECTRIC CABARET W/BELIZBEHA, STRANGEFOLK, MOTEL BROWN, RACHEL BISSEX, KATHERINE QUINN, YOLANDA, LARA & GREG NOBLE (groove, rock,

RETRONOME (DJ), 10 p.m. NC. POPGUN (reggae), Manhattan Pizza, 10 p.m. NC. DAVE KELLER BLUES BAND, t ® W b r i t Pub & Brewery, 10 p.m. NC. COMEDY ZONE

WITH STARLINE RHYTHM BOYS

SAT 4/25

(stand-up), Radisson Hotel, 8 & 10 p.m. $7.

KARAOKE, Franny O's, 9:30 p.m. NC. GUY COLASACCO (singer-songwriter), Jake's, 6:30 p.m. N C . THE MCCLENATHANS (rock), Patches Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC. JENNI JOHNSON (jazz/blues vocals), Tuckaway's, Sheraton Hotel, 9 p.m. N C . RICK THOMAS (acoustic), Ground Round, 8 p.m. N C . SAND BLIZZARD (rock), Trackside Tavern, Winooski, 9 p.m. $2. BREAKAWAY,

STARLINE RHYTHM BOYS (bluegrass, hillbilly boogie), Higher Ground, Winooski, 9 p.m. $3. SMOKIN' GUN (rock), Edgewater Pub, Colchester, 9 p.m. N C . All

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SHOW!

. Christian Wolff

TLE MARTIN (DJ), 135 Pearl, 9 p.m. $4/5. KATHERINE QUINN

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NC. BURLINGTONITUS W/THE STAND GT, THE SIN EATERS, THE FOUR COLOR MANUAL, PILOT TO GUNNER, THE PARCELS (indie-fest),

YOU!

9 p.m. NC. DERRICK SEMLER BLUES BAND, Charlie O's, Montpelier, 9 p.m. NC. JUKEBOX HEROES (rock), Legends, Montpelier, 9 p.m. $4. SHANE & CHARLOTTE

MUNRO (acoustic), La Brioche, Montpelier, 11 a.m. N C . LIVE MUSIC (acoustic), Main Street Bar & Grill,

SATURDAY

WED 4/22 M E P f S K I M A R T I N A N P W O O P fc

Douglas I. Repetto Kojiro Umezaki Matthew B. Smith Colby N. Leider Kui Dong,

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TUESDAY

Brian J. Cina

OPEN MIKE (acoustic), Burlington Coffeehouse at

Rhombus, 8 p.m. $3-6. PAUL ASBELL & CLYDE STATS (jazz),

Leunig's, 8:30 p.m. N C . DJ NIGHT, Ruben James, 9

p.m. NC. DERRICK SEMLER (blues), Red Square, 9 p.m.

NC. GOOD QUESTION (rock), Nectar's, 9:30 p.m. NC. MERL SAUNDERS & THE RAINFOREST BAND (jazz-groove), Club

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Toast, 9:30 p.m. $12. MARTIN & MITCHELL (DJs), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. N C . RUSS & CO. (rock), J.P.'s Pub,

9:30 p.m. NC. SNEAKERS JAZZ BAND, Higher Ground, Winooski, 8 p.m. $2. JALAPENO BROS, (rock), Cheers, 9 p.m. N C . REBECCA PADULA (folk), Swift House, Middlebury, 7:30 p.m. N C .

unless Advice"

otherwise at

Say you saw it in

SEVEN DAYS

noted. http://www.sevendaysvt.com

released, CD) — Spills second C D release offers up a have to say I found the anomalous attempts at humor — a sample of the Cowardly Lion introducplatter of modern rock with a capital T — for testosing the sleep-inducing "Counting Sheep," and die terone — that seems geared to hop right onto the silly closer, "El Nifio" — oddly encouraging. Here's radio. Produced at Eclipse Studio by Joe Egan, the why: Spill are an earnest bunch with pretty clear full, and sometimes compressed, instrumental mix is direction, but seem to take themselves almost too perfectly balanced to showcase Aaron Inghams great seriously. That heavy altbig voice (this nicely augmented on occasion thing has been on the by guests Aaron Flinn and Patty Lynch). In < a fact, everything about Something Good (an H H M I I S l ^ H ^ ^ H ^ ^ I ' r w a v e s awhile, and j j S N ^ ^ ^ ^ H J ^ I the competitions tough; optimistic title if I ever heard one) is big — B • P ^ H Spill will need to distinShawn Bakers searing guitar, Jon Coes bass, I and especially Patrick Gillespie's drum sound. I L ^ H ^ ^ P ^ V ^ v H themselves with Think of the sound of a 747 taking off, then I something other than an imagine it landing delicately on a lilypad, P ext remely competent then lifting ofif into the cosmos. That's the B | I ability to fit in, I'm not idea when the roaring "Finger Food" switches I saying humor is the gears to the balladry of the provocatively • B p j f l ^ ^ ^ ^ H answer, but the capacity pop, "For the Graces" and the chunky | le Bird Told Me," are two of the most dynamic wnes here. *S|ck out with that old clichd I - c a p p i n g g r o o v e o v e r e y e b r o w - r a i s i n g lyrics. S p i l l i a surprisingly palatable cover of "Darling^ikki The Artist wfcStn he was SriU known as Prince. -

h to puncture tlic tiiolci

sure helps. Something Good is true to its promise, but I'm looking for something uniquely great next time, and I'll wager they could pull it off. Stocklan and 27 Down join Spill for their C D release party this Friday at Toast. And check the acoustic in-store appearance at Disc Go Round, 3 p.m. ©

May

13-8pm

Memorial Auditorium Burlington, VT with special guest

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rhythm & news Continued from page 10 with their DJs Jon Demus and Niceness, and Huli, Matt Smith and Chancellor, respectively. And just so you know what to expect, "bashment" is Jamaican slang for par-fm?. T h e local dancehall scenes been going strong with regular nights at Ruben James and Metronome, and bolstered by the occasional appearances o f Jamaican greats, both oldschool and new, at Toast. But this Friday, all you have to do is hear the beat and move your feet — and all points in between — and cross your fingers that you're the shit. If you are, you take home $300. Lesser prizes award runners-up, and a good time is had by all. Irie, by jeezum.

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CRITICAL MASS

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I reported here a while back that SandOze guitarist Chris Nolin had written an actual Catholic mass, for God's sake (actually, for his music major). Next Tuesday, you can hear the whole Missa Brevis in D Major, with 10 singers, accompanied by piano and flute, at St. Mikes McCarthy Arts Center. With his soon-to-be-released C D , Every Step We Take, Nolin demonstrates that rock and religion aren't always so very far apart. Amen.

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ambitious take on the music biz than the local music festival in Northampton, Mass., starting this Wednesday, but this first annual bash has gotta be some kinda fun. Sort of like a longer Burlingtonitus, it features 20 (or 21, depending on which source you check) 'hamp bands at the Baystate Hotel over five days. All shows five bucks. That's about all I know, but you can find the full schedule at www.virtual-valley.com/hmf. Got friends in western Mass. to crash with, check it out and report back.

April 24- 26

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music fans, you'll be happy to know that 99.9 T h e Buzz is zooming in on an all-new "Buzz Homebrew Hour," up from a few minutes to 60. That would be Sunday nights at 9:30, right after the indie-fest, "Spinning Unrest." Homebrew will feature not only new recorded tracks from local boys and girls, but live performances, interviews, guests, etc., etc. Oh, and the theme song was written by the one and only James Kochalka Superstar. Listen in for the debut May 3, featuring music from Zola Turn and an interview with Tom Baggott, director of the forthcoming Burlington Music Conference. Musicians, send your stuff to Buzz Homebrew, P O B 999, Burlington, V T 05402.

DO GOOD DEPT. There's that Burlington Music Conference again — this time I have to urge you to attend a most deserving, and needy, benefit concert in order for this conference to be all it wants to be. . This Thursday, show your support and take in the considerable talents of Bostons Mistle Thrush and Burlington's Chin H o ! and Invisible Jet at Club Metronome. And next Monday, same place, give it up for the Women's Rape Crisis Center, at the Electric Cabaret, a musically diverse bash organized by J i m Lockridge of Big Heavy World (look for compilation C D , No Secrets). Onstage: Strangefolk, Belizbeha and Motel Brown, alternating with acoustic sets by Rachel Bissex, Yolanda, Katherine Q u i n n and Lara & Greg Noble. INDIE-CENT

Since I didn't get any photos to show, I'll just have to tell: Burlingtonitis IV is the place to be "scene" this weekend if you love the young and fuzzy sounds generally, and inadequately, known as "indie" — that's independent to the rest of you. Three days, three clubs (Toast, Metronome, 242 Main), 15 acts — including Burlington's M y Own Sweet and Four Color Manual, and a surprise (well, not any more) return appearance of Stupid Club, aka Neil Cleary, fresh from Austin. My recommendation for the, uh, older crowd? T h e spankin' new hillbilly boogie unit, Starline Rhythm Boys — comprising Danny Coane, Billy Bratcher (just off the road with Wayne Hancock) and Al Leary. The thumpin' trio opens for T h e Throbulators and Breakaway Friday and Saturday, respectively, at Higher Ground in Winooski.

SINGLE TRACKS This

Friday night, check out Burlington indie-faves My Own Sweet live on "Burlington & Beyond," on W W P V 88.7 F M . . . Anyone who wants to register for next fall's C M J conference in New York, you get 30 percent off if you register by April 25 ($245 now, $370 after October 1, so don't slack). Registration info at 516498-3143 or registration@cmj.com . . . Got a C D to sell? Get your merch on Big Heavy World's new Indie Co-op, an on-line consignment store for the Burlington area music scene. Check details at www.bigheavyworld.com . . . (7)

....SAN FRANCISCO BASICS

If Merl Saunders

needs any introduction in this town by now, I don't know what the world's coming to. The Main Man with the Rainforest Band returns to Toast next Tuesday.

SEVEN DAYS

—

Kevin

Kellev

ot many large-scale construction projects have gone forward in Burlington in recent years without intense opposition from nearby residents. The waterfront skateboard park, the mixed-income housing complex on Mansfield Avenue, the eco-industrial development on the edge of the Intervale — these and other initiatives have sparked protests from neighbors concerned about increased noise, traffic and loss of open land.

So strong are the fears of Burlington becoming more citified that some developers, public and private alike, doubt that significant growth will take place here. How can urbanization continue, they ask, in a political environment where just a few disgruntled citizens are able to block projects they don't like? But the sizable library nearing completion on the Champlain College campus suggests that major construction can indeed take place in Burlington — provided that certain conditions are scrupulously met. "There's been virtually no opposition to this project," says Andy Montroll, a City Councilor representing the hill section, home to some of Burlington's most powerful residents. "Its one o f the few projects of its size to gain so much acceptance from neighbors." "From the perspective of where I live," adds attorney Aaron Goldberg, "it's certainly a massive structure." But although his home is directly across Summit Street from the

four-story, 28,000-squarefoot library, Goldberg says he has "no reservations" about the latest addition to the Champlain campus. "It's a beautiful building," he declares. The Information Commons, as the high-tech facility is officially known, differs from most proposed developments in Burlington in some crucial respects. Unlike a housing complex or industrial installation, it will probably generate little additional car traffic. And a library, by definition, won't produce anything like the noise of a skateboard park. But the brick-and-shingle building did consume a chunk of open land, and it does represent a further expansion by an institution that was widely viewed, just a few years ago, as a rapacious force threatening an entire residential area. Old private homes were being bought up by Champlain and converted into offices or student housing. At the same time, once-quiet streets were becoming clogged with cars as the school's many day students competed with residents for curbside parking spaces. Local protests, combined with a change in Champlain's leadership, caused the college in the early '90s to take a more conciliatory approach to its surrounding community. The 120-year-old institution negotiated a formal agreement with the City, setting strict boundaries on where and how it could grow. Efforts were also made to reduce noise and traffic congestion. "There's been a tremendous

-•IT*

v'^ftisllj

A new library at Champlain College gets a nod from the neighborhood

'K FOR ARCHITECTURE amount of outreach into the community" on Champlain's part, notes Montroll. Administrators "have gone out of their way to accommodate the neighborhoods' needs. And Roger Perry has been a big part of that outreach and that change." Formerly the school's dean of academics, Perry was appointed Champlain's president in 1992. His dictum: "It's essential that the college have a good-neighbor relationship with the people around it." Perry has personally visited several nearby residents, assuring them that Champlain has no designs on their homes and that the college will respond to their complaints and concerns.

That attentive approach was adhered to throughout the planning and construction of the library. Homeowners along Summit and Maple Streets were consulted early in the process and invited to offer suggestions for design improvements. "We wanted the building to be a good neighbor," notes Tom Cullins, lead architect for the project. "We showed people sketches and sought their opinions. Our aim was to design a building whose presence reflected its importance, but we also wanted it to fit into the area. We didn't want it to scream, 'Look at me!'" The Information Commons in fact closes a gap around the green on Champlain's core

It's essential that the college have a good-neighbor relationship with the people around it." - Roger Perry Champlain College president campus, completing a coherent architectural composition whose density is distinctively urban. The materials chosen for the building's exterior are harContinued

on next page

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SEVEN DAYS

apri1

22 ,

199

Peter

Kurth

ne day in August 1870, as Philip E. Baruth tells us in his absorbing new novel, The Dream of the White Village, the writer Henry James took a steamer from Fort Ticonderoga north on Lake Champlain. "He had

technical term" of a pool game. There's only one degree of separation in Burlington, Baruth concludes, if indeed there's any separation at all. The Dream of the White Village is a "novel in stories" divided into three sections, "The Present," "The Past," and "The Past in the Present," with Burlington itself

BOOKS

merge in Baruth's narrative. There's a gentle, forlorn carpenter who's wandered to Burlington from Connecticut by way of California; an angry barmaid and would-be activist perennially disgruntled by the smugness of the small city; Leon, living in a half-way house at the foot of Pearl Street and suspected of arson in the strange series of church-burn-

NO PLACE LIKE HOME as the central character. Against been traveling and writing up the backdrop of the town and his travels," says Baruth, "and its recent history, Baruth, who he was bored with mountain teaches English at the Univervistas and panoramas." sity of Vermont When the and at MiddleThe Dream of the boat stopped bury Colleges Hhite Village: A in Burlington, New England Novel in Stories. James took a Young Writers' by P h i l i p E. B a r u t h . stroll, walking Conference, has R . N . M . I n c . . 333 around town woven the stories pages. $24. for about an of apparently hour and diverse individuremarking on als into a single thread of longthe "civic greenness and stilling, ambition and the search ness and sweetness of the for love. First among the playplace," and the "pleasant, solid ers is Maurice Masseau, a American homes" that graced policeman's son with an eye to the hill. Only the waterfront, becoming mayor of Burlingto James' sophisticated eye, ton. Maurice is one of the leadmarred what was otherwise the ers of an informal political "supremely beautiful" aspect of "club," a kind of old-boy votethe Queen City. buying network masterminded "The lower portion by the by a crony of his father's who lake-side is savagely raw and wants to see local power wrestshabby," James declared, "but •*••••*» •**-• I :r~ r irii'ii

the Jong M I L which it partly covers, it gradually becomes the most truly charming, I fancy, of New England country towns." Baruth, too, is riveted by the waterfront, both as setting and as metaphor. He compares Burlington's waterfront park to a "giant's pool table," and says it's the most important thing you need to know about the town, "because it tells you more clearly than anything else the physics of the place and the people, and consequently how its stories should be told."

"If you watch that rectangle of grass on a sunny May afternoon," writes Baruth, "sooner or later you'll see everyone in town make their pass through it....They'll see five or fifteen people that they know, and they'll link up for an instant. They'll bat the breeze, they'll observe the rituals. And in that sense there's no way to tell the story of one Burlington individual or even of one family, because the path and angle of any one person depends on how they glance off at least ten others, on what direction those ten others came from and what precisely pushed them on their way." Continuing the allusion to pool, Baruth observes that given a surprisingly short interval of time, any two people in Burlington ... will make contact. Or kiss, to use the

Baruth reads the city from east to west, saying that Pearl Street, in particular, "is the one street that tells you, in its slow roller-coaster descent to the water, all you need to know." ed from the "Progs" and flatlanders and restored to the "true" inhabitants of the town. The Masseau family has a number of secrets and skeletons in its past, as do all the others whose lives "kiss" and

ings that shook Burlington in the 1970s; Monica, the blithely unfeeling mother of the activist-waitress, and "Vermont's second-most-famous female poet;" and Cheryl-lin — in my opinion, the most enchanting character in the book — a Chinese-American lesbian diabetic recovering from problems with substance abuse. "It's not that I don't love this town," says Cheryl-lin as she leaves Vermont to visit her mother in Taiwan, "I do. I think it's a very sane and a very healthy place to live your life. The quality of life is really, really phenomenal." Sound familiar? "Quality of life" is the reason most often cited by out-of-towners who move to Burlington, a city that was, in the not-so-distant past, just a French-Canadian rail and shipping town with a universi-' ty and a lot of views. But there's a price to pay for the beauty and the ease of everyday living, as Baruth well knows. "I do love it," says Cheryllin. "I love the people and the places, but the drawback is that it's so absolutely and horribly fucking small that you have to love them seventeen or eighteen times a day. It's like some Greek mythological torture after awhile; the same sweet old man taking your money at the gas station turns out to be the usher at the movies, your friend's uncle. Then he turns up sitting next to you at some Italian restaurant. Or you start going out with someone and you find out day by day all the little incestuous ways you're already related to them. I mean like you once — I don't know — you once French-kissed their aunt or something at some coming-out dance or you saw their father go into a motel with some teenage girl. Or you once had a one-night stand in their apartment before they lived there. Or just seeing the same people day after day, winter, spring, same. Fall. Doesn't matter. Same." It's a bit disconcerting to read a book that's openly set in the town you live in — and, in my own case, grew up in — with the streets appearing Continued

on page 17

Astrology Readings/ E.S.P. Psychic Readings, Tarot Cards, Palm Readings I

I give never failing advice on all matters of life, such as love, courage, marriage, divorce, business transactions of all kinds. I never fail to reunite the separated, or cause speedy and happy marriages. I will lift you out of sorrow and trouble and start you on the path of happiness and prosperity. There is no heart so sad and dreary that I cannot bring sunshine into it. All readings are treated with complete privacy and confidentially.

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We s e l l a l o t of c a r s to people who p a t r o n i z e the a r t s . They seem to be more a f f l uent, h i g h e r educated, more q u a l i t y - o r i e n t e d than the average auto buyer. * Seven Days d e l i v e r s t h a t demographic. And the f o l k s , t h e r e r e a l l y care about t h e i r customers, j u s t l i k e we do. They are not some money - g r u b b i ng o u t - o f - s t a t e media monster t h a t eats i t s employees f o r l u n c h . A r l o Cota owner, A u t o s p o r t Imported Car Wi11i s t o n Not p i c t u r e d : ' J e r o m e '

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seven days i t works

Continued from page 15 under their own names and local landmarks popping up

f T'More

per,inently 1

round it interesting to encounter any kind of literary take on a place I have alway: classification C J

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east to west, citing Pearl, College and Main Streets as its central arteries and saying j f i a t Pearl Street, in particular, "is the one street that tells you, m its slow roller-coaster descent to the water, all you need to know." Another writer might have looked at it differently, reading the city ftom south to north, to include the tony "hill" section, Church Street and North Avenue as the actual routes to civic truth. I'm not at all convinced, as Baruth seems to be, that Burlington is "a Finch-sized town with a condors heart," nor do I share with one of his characters the view that everyone in Burlington looks clean. "Everyone seemed to wear glasses and neat khaki pants, pressed shirts. To Alison, everyone looked smart and rich." (As I said, Baruth has left Church Street largely out of account.) But these are minor thoroughly enjoyed • Baruths tour of a town I thought I knew. As his tales unfold, you find yourself well and truly drawn in to his subjects' lives and rooting, in a strange way, even for the mean and nasty ones. Baruth writes well, often beautifully, and hes got an ear for bar and pool-hall slang and the casual

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Your letters to the U S D A can influence the future of organic agriculture Your opinion can help shape the standards of the USDA's _ _ _ _ _ _ National Organic Program (NOP). The new NOP will ^ ^ mm assure consumers that food labeled "organic" Br^fcv has been produced according to one nationj wide standard enforced by the U.S. govern/ ' ^ B P ^ H I ^ C ^ J p ^ ' ^ f ' l J r ment. But the USDA has left open s o m e 1+mJif very controversial issues - including t h e I I J ^ ^ S r ^ ^ W ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ 0 ^ possibility o f using g e n e t i c engineer1 ing, s e w a g e s l u d g e and even irradiation for the production o f organic f o o d s .

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SEVEN DAYS

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Village: A Novel in Stories by Philip E. Baruth his novel

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2 5 % O F Ff

T h e Book Rack and Children's Pages C h a m p l a i n Mill, Winooski • 8 0 2 - 6 5 5 - 0 2 3 1

Continued from page 6 find it appalling that Americans worship movie stars and sports stars.") So do I, Ms. DeForest, which is why you 11 never hear me asking for a list of heroes from men. It would be made up entirely of billionaires, rock musicians and golfers. Lea Wood of Underhill wrote to praise Eleanor Roosevelt, Alice Walker, Joan Baez and Dr. Helen Caldicott: "Plus another you probably never heard of: Katya Komisaruk," the subject of a 1989 video documentary called First Strike: Portrait of an Activist. "Singlehandedly," writes Ms. Wood, "Katya went to Vandenburg Air Force Base, home of the M X missile, got into the base undetected and, still undetected, to the room holding the NAVSTAR computer used to target U.S.

undetect-

through April 30

x A • S TO

/l e

' C A

L L e D

4 Mtoktt Sfceet • ZtMnd

May's

JANE

'Qiuk

£ NHit

magazine says

m\MilkiJ

T ^ f a t f j t 'ims

The brand-new Olive & Bette's catalog, which offers Daryl K tops, Hard Candy eyeshadow and Diane Von Furstenberg wrap dresses, is finally filling a black hole in the mail-order business - stuff that we'd actually want to buy. Created by Stacey Pecor and Karen Greenberg, it follows two fictitious women as they gallivant through New York City's Upper W e s t Side. Call 8 8 8 - S M R T G R L to get your copy.

Catalogue 1-888-SMRTGRL Olive & Bette's • Champlain Mill, Winooski Olive & Bette's • 252 Columbus Ave., NY, NY

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

« * * « * * * * * * « * SEVEN DAYS

mto your dough into ginger snaps — I like that in a woman. (Is that misogynist?) I had two letters in praise of lesbians, generically and specifically, one from the aforementioned D . D . TaylorGarcfa, whose tone grew less hostile as she went along and who apologized that she "couldn't think of very many straight women for the list." She mentioned, among others, the cartoonist Diane Di Massa, aka " M o m m y St. Wee Wee, creator of Hothead Paisan, Homicidal Lesbian Terrorist;" Lani Kaahumanu, "founder o f the Safer Sex Sluts;" and Pat Califa, "sex radical and general pervert." Alverta Perkins of South Burlington wrote to nominate three local movers and shakers. "We have several outstanding and very outspoken, brilliant women [here]," she says. " T h e first that comes to mind is devoted mu'

We must also

[Crow] Cohen, who has refused to l«t the efforts of

CRANK CAll Continued

This Summer at Burlington College.

Give Yourself Credit!

from page 18

women who have gone before us be forgotten." I have to say that this is one of the nicest letters I've ever received from the lesbian faction, which normally is not Kurth-friendly. So here's to Peggy, O a k and Crow — may they prosper. Finally, I had a most thoughtful and well-argued letter from Christine Tiplady, also of Underhill, who put novelist and philosopher Ayn Rand at the top of her list of heroes. I've never read Rand — just the thought of her scares me — so I'm not in a position to challenge Ms. Tiplady's assessment: "She was not afraid to stand by her opinions, which flew in the face of trendy sociological theories, and even in the face of the very bases of Judeo-Christian morality (as in her famed championing of The Virtue of Selfishness). Even if for nothing else, you have to admire her guts. I admire her guts, her integrity, her iconoclasm, a great many of her ideas, and I loved Atlas li Shrugged. "Another neat thing about Ms. Rand is that what she got famous for had nothing at all to do with being female," says Ms. Tiplady, who also put Laura Ingalls Wilder — "Yes, MewsS t h b ^ M s o u s kttie House books" — and cartoon character Lisa Simpson on her list, the latter for the most admirable reasons: "She has not f a l l e n into the trap of parent-hatred. She doesn't even seem to be in therapy." A cartoon figure is as heroic as any, I suppose, but I draw the line at Ms. Tiplady's objections to Madonna, whom I had mentioned in my column as a veritable inspiration for the ages. "What's with this Madonna worship?" Ms. Tiplady asks. "What has she done noteworthy besides sell images of her body? The music attached to her name is insipid and her singing is lousy. She isn't even a 'musician' of any sort: she lipsynchs at her concerts.' I suppose she dances and acts, but I hardly see why that makes her a hero." Well, Ms. Tiplady, I know you're looking forward to my Madonna column, but I'm out of space. I'll have to save it for another time (you're not off the hook). A hint: There's a difference between celebrity and fame, between character and mere personality, as your letter amply demonstrates. Madonna is.. .Madonna. Maybe it's a gay thing. Stay tuned. (7)

Serving dinner daily ^

COURSES Graphic Animation • Non-Linear Editing • Women and Film in a Patriarchal Society: The Male Gaze • Calculus • Fire and Clay •A River Runs Through It All: Paddling to a Greater Awareness Of Vermont's Watersheds • Dreams and the Creative Imagination (a ten-day, 6-credit residential course) •Summer Writing Seminar •Duke Ellington and Thelonious Monk

restaurant and bar

WORKSHOPS •Non-Profit Organizations Series: Management; Grantwriting; Fundraising •Advanced Cinematography • Forest Ecology • Montreal Museum Trip •Art and Form: Clinical and Theatrical Expressions of the Creative Unconscious • Reading Poetry • Outdoor Color Photography •Meditation: Being Free to Struggle •Shiatsu: Beginning Level 1

169 Church Street • 865-5155

(802)

W-2TCO

Burlington Wk College

from Ani DiFranco to Tibetan Monks

95 North Avenue, Burlington VT05401 (800) 862-9616 www.burlcol.edu e-mail: admissions @burlcoledu

21 Church St. Burlington 863-8326 Open Seven Days

e u s r # * ^ FfASK

—r»tvAT*

BODY PIERCING

Season Ending Party presented by Q 0 at the R

April 23* Featuring

F r i d a y , M a y 8 t h e VSO is j o i n e d b y f i d d l e r

PS^T^H ftfcK^B

mark o'connor Virtuoso fiddler Mark O'Connors technique and instrumental mastery transcends musical styles. He comes back to play with theVSO under the direction of KateTamarkin on Friday, May 8 at 8:30 p.m. at the Flynn.

and Special Guest

Christine Adler

Tickets are $11-$31 and on sale now from theVSO Ticketline at 864-5741, ext. 12 or I-800-VSO-9293 or from the Flynn Box Office (86-FLYNN). A limited number of $10 tickets are available for college students.

$12 Tickets on sale Thursday, April 9 at Crossroads Beverage, Waterbury • Main St. News, Montpelier • Stowe Beverage • The Flynn, Burlington and at 253-NAIL

Doors open at 8:00 pm

graphic design services: n / i c / Q / 0 0 4 - 3 0 0 4

255 South Champlain Street ~ Wed. thru Fri.

1 9 98

5 pm - 2 am Friday

• Computer

Seven Days

2 2.

5 pm - 1 am Saturday

Brochures ~ Business Cards Event Programs ~ Menus ~ Etc.

PMl

5 - 11 pm Sunday - Thursday

SEViN DAYS

new from the Vermont Symphony Orchestra Burlington's hip new series at the Flynn

98.9WOKO

CHEESE t r a d e r s

SEVEN DAYS

106JW&N

Come hear Mark O ' C o n n o r and Kate Tamarkin talk with Pamela Polston of Seven Days for Musically Speaking, a preconcert discussion on the Flynn stage Friday, May 8 at 7 p.m.

m u s i c s propria,

inc.

PRESENTS

J.S. Back Cantor-Courtier-Comic Wedding Cantata 1Q6 Brandenburg Concerto V Coffee Cantata 211

Friday, May 1, 1 9 9 8 8 p m S t . Paul's Catliedral Ckerry at Battery, Burlington S p e c i a l P r o m o t i o n a n d reception Ky

UNCOMMON GROUNDS DECEIVE | l OFF COUPON WH PURCHASE OF BULK COFFEE OR TEA FROM UNCOMMON GROUNDS A&mission: # 1 0 . 0 0 ; Seniors & Students, $ 8 . 0 0

Mozzarella. Julienne Carrot & Turnip. Mother Sauces.

Culinary art meets science.

INTRODUCING " N E C I AT NITE"

not-for-credit menu of

New England Culinary

seminars.

Institute announces a

offered at the new

very appetizing new

NECI Commons on

short courses

and

Courses

Church Street. To

series in partnership with UVM's College of Agriculture &

receive a brochure call 802-872-758I e ma.il:. n e c i n i t e @ together.net

Life Sciences faculty. A new, academic.

\The UNIVERSITY

^ o ^ r U r j Working Nights for YDU

of V E R M O N T

NEW ENGLAND CULINARY INSTITUTE

a unique double bill

LOUDON WAINWRIGHT III One of the most humorous

and heartbreaking

singer-songwriters.

SUZZY ROCHE The youngest

third of The Roches...

FRIDAY, M A Y 1

beguiling,

7 : 3 0 PM

unconventional...

BARRE O P E R A HOUSE

CALENC

WEDNESDAY e a r t h

d a y

music

VAUGHAN R E C I T A L SERIES: Pianist Andrew O'Brien performs works by Chopin and Brahms at the Faulkner Recital Hall, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N . H . , 12:30 p.m. Free. Info, 603-646-2422.

dance

special

guest

appearance

BENOIT BOURQUE AM} GASTON BERNARD Vibrant traditional

music

TICKETS: $ 2 2 . $ 1 9 . $16

and stepdance

of Quebec

DISCOUNTS FOR SENIORS AND CHILDREN UNDER 12. Now on sale through the Barre Opera House Box Office (802) 476-6168 A benefit concert for the Weltspring Waldorf School of Chelsea, Vermont Co-sponsored by: Anichini and Kimbell Sherman & Ellis Media Sponsor: WNCS (104.7) "The Point"

INTERNATIONAL FOLK DANCI N G : Traditional dances from around the globe keep you moving at St. Augustine's Church Hall, Montpelier, 7:30 p.m. $5. Info, 223-7035. D A N C E S O F U N I V E R S A L PEACE: Dance with your deity in simple circle dances that incorporate diverse spiritual

SEVEN DAYS

traditions from around the world. Dewey Hall, Vermont College, Montpelier, 7-9

and Pictures in Japanese Film.' Abernethy Room, Starr Library,

p.m. $5. Info, 658-2447.

Middlebury College, 4:30 p.m. Free. |

drama

Info, 443-5502.

' S E A R C H F O R SIGNS...': Lily Tomlin co-wrote this cosmic comedy about a "bag lady" who guides Earth-bound aliens searching for signs of intelligent life. Montpelier City Hall Arts Center, 8 p.m. $12. Info, 229-0492.

D O U B L E FEATURE: A gun-toting guitar player calls the shots in the Mexican indie El Mariachi. The tough-guy theme continues with Hard-Boiled, by John Woo. Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N . H . 6:45 & 8:25 p.m. $6. Info, 603646-2422. JAPANESE FILM L E C T U R E : Middlebury prof Carole Cavanaugh offers a lecture entitled, "Between Words

words

R H O M B U S P O E T R Y SERIES: The Old North End Writers Group gets i t gear before an open reading. Rhombu Gallery, 186 College St., Burlington, p.m. $2-6. Info, 865-3144. T I M B R O O K E S : The B u r l i n g t o n au of Signs of Life discusses different waj dying. U V M Regional C e n t e r , Montpelier City Center, noon - 1 p m- Fre< Info, 223-0388. M Y S T E R Y LOVERS B O O K GROW Marian Mosher leads a literary invest' tion of Mr. Donahue Investigates, M Shone. Barnes & Noble B o o k s t o r e , ^ Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 864-8 W R I T E R S R E A D I N G : Poet Julia Chris Ha Lebentritt and fiction writer read from their respective works at I

CE SCREAM:

Three thousand young

;rs take up smoking every year, giving

ming to the childhood chant: "ashes,

iey all fall down." The Department of pd Spectrum Youth Services fights fire with prevention programs at a talk on tobac?ens.

Rule with an iron . . . lung?

GOING OUT OF BUSINESS! FINAL DAYS!

hearts and homes, in tradition, Lyric Theater goes all out — and over the rainbow — in this stage version of the masterful musical. Part of the proceeds help pave the yellow brick road to success for the Flynn Preservation Fund. Friday to Sunday, April 24 to 26. Flynn Theatre, Burlington. See calendar for times. $7-17. Info, 863-5966.

or/7 24. Roman Catholic Diocese of n, 351 North Ave.* Burlington, 8:30-11 donation. Info, 863-9626.

STICK-Y SITUATION:

Winter may be

INVENTORY LIQUIDATION

history, but its icy ravages are still lying about. Why not lend yourself to an Earth Day effort to

) ASSETS:

The cruelest month?

>ut the sweetest —

in St. Albans, anyway,

ans maple. Go for the gold at the Vermont

"fctival — three delicious days of contests, the annual "Sap Run" road race. With

make at least one public park debris-free? North Beach gets the Vermont Natural Resources treatThey came, they sawed, they conquered. . . 9:30 a.m. Free. Info, 223-2328.

event.

ON A HIGH NOTE: Move

around

See calendar for times. $2-12. Info,

G KCDUUKU^:

( liassman

Saturday, April 25. North Beach Park, Burlington,

pected for pancakes, it's sure to be a Sunday, April 24 to 26. Locations

EVERYTHING MUST GO!

ment on a day that brings tree lovers together.

over, Cherie

Hem

Clmrcli

Si reel

B u r l iiMjlon

Tartt. Diva Madame Vera Galupe-Borszkh is serious

862-1332

competition — a red-haired transvestite the Village Voice described as "Bette Midler on Benzedrine."

Timing is

especially when it comes to breeding. I of area creatures take their cue from water sources called "vernal pools."

Ira Siff is not |||y easy on the eyes. He sings as well as he satirizes. Monday, April 27. Concert Hall, Middlebury College

1998 V E R M O N T M O Z A R T FESTIV,

Center for the Arts, 8 p.m. $15-35. Info, 443-6433.

iree chances to test the waters this week

wa)

before they're all washed up.

PRESENTS-*,!'.

Friday, April 24. Room 129, Marsh Life Science Building, UVM, Burlington, 1-4:30 p.m. Free. Info, 656-0423. Friday and Saturday, April 24 and 25. Vermont Institute of Natural vgciqtice, Montpelier, 7-9 p.m. and 9 a.m. - noon. $9. Info,

229-6206.

annual Burlington Stage and Screen Awards Dinner. You don't need a Givenchi gown or a press pass to s eak a peak at the honored celebrities here Titanic won't be floating around to sink the suspense.

;. - - s £ r

Wednesday, April 29. Radisson Hotel, Burlington, 5:30 p.m. $50. Info, 865-7166.

BECAUSE, BECAUSE, BECAUSE: Before twisters hit

— written by Karen Vincent

the big screen and the nightly

ran

Wizard of Oz blew into America's

presents 1 9 9 8

Pan A m e r i c a n

July 10 t o A u g u s t

T h e a t e r

A r t s

Institute

1 0 a t H u n g e r M o u n t a i n in C e n t r a l V T

Featuring: Puppetry • D a n c e • Performing A r t s • Original Music - Visual A r t s • R e s i d e n c i e s • Sol y Luna • P o p o l V u h Hands on Papier Mache • Collective Creation

kids

PARENTS A N O N Y M O U S : Parents gather for support and assistance around the challenges of childrearing. Babysitting goes with the program at the King Street Youth C e n t e r , Burlington, 6-8 p.m. Free. Info, 8 0 0 - 6 3 9 - 4 0 1 4 . 'SALMON S T O R I E S ' : Learn about the life cycle of lake salmon, from egg to fry. Lake Champlain Basin Science Center, Kington Waterfront, 1:30-2:30 p.m. & Info, 864-1848.

'GROWING - T O - G O ' : Bring innovative Pots like hats and sneakers to a gardenl n g session with planting purposes. Lake C h a m p l a i n Basin Science Center, Burl:mgton Waterfront, 1:30-2:30 p.m. -80fl Info, 864-1848. L Sol I N T R O T O BATS: Vacationing kids Hi take a w a l k on the wild side, er, slide, at i the first of three natural history shows.

OU est I ivAl

Montshire Museum of Science, Norwich, 11:30 a.m. $5. Info, 649-2200. S T O R I E S : Children listen, snack and make crafts at the Children's Pages, Winooski, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 655-1537. C O L D - B L O O D E D CREATURES: School kids explore the scaly world of reptiles and amphibians at the Green Mountain Audubon Nature Center, Huntington, 8:30 a.m. - 4 p.m. $35. Register, 434-3068. T H E T I N Y A M E R I C A N NOVEL': Kids five and up construct little paper books in which to write their "Magnum Opus." Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10 a.m. - noon. Free. Info, 865-7216.

etc

«A C E L E B R A T I O N O F C H E E S E ' : An eight-week series on farmstead cheesemaking features Jean Descouteaux from Kingsey Cheese in Hardwick. New England Culinary Institute, 25 Church St., Burlington, 5:30-6:30 p.m. $15.

•

2 p e r f o r m a n c e s at Bread & P u p p e t A u g u s t 8 & 9

april 2 2 - 2 9 Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 865-4795.

Live

L A T I N A M E R I C A N A R T I S T S A N D G U E S T D I R E C T O R T O BE A N N O U N C E D

Info, 863-5237. ' T O W N M E E T I N G ' : In response to President Clintons "Initiative on Race," panelists speak on race issues, followed by questions from the audience. Ross Sports Center, St. Michael's College, Colchester, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 654-2535. AMERICAN W O O D C O C K SIGHTI N G : Mike Carlo leads birders on a search for the rarely-seen American Woodcock during courting season. Birds of Vermont Museum, Huntington, 7:30 p.m. $3. Info, 434-2167. ' D O G E N D E R ROLES REALLY MATTER?': Anyone for The Lion Queen? Jan Hovden offers a "feminist rhetorical analysis" of Disney cartoons. John Dewey Lounge, Old Mill, U V M , Burlington, 12:20-1:10 p.m. Free. Info, 656-2005. RACIAL F O R U M : The federal Office for Civil Rights hears public testimony on racial harassment issues on campus. Identifying "effective solutions" is part of the public process. Memorial Lounge,

Register now — Limited enrollment Contact: Sam Kerson 802.223.5124 Dragon Dance R D # I , W o r c e s t e r , V T 05682 E-Mail: ninshabor@aol.com

mmmam

Gjet o j t oF totfN! N°tf

S W N 3

UJNCH

ON . S a t u r d a y

1V30-200

1 Josr

MIN01TS

FROM

BDILWerON

c o n t i n u e d o n next p a g e a p r i l

2 2 ,

1 9 9 8

SEVEN DAYS

page

. Ms

Waterman Building, U V M ,

search for love in all the wrong places."

sculpture" of Joseph Beuys; in anticipa-

Memorial Library, Colchester, 7 - 8 : 3 0

Burlington, 11 a.m. - noon. Free. Info,

Montpelier City Hall, 8 p.m. $12.

tion of local participation in his " 7 0 0 0

p.m. Free. Register, 8 7 9 - 7 5 7 6 .

656-3368;

Info, 2 2 9 - 0 4 9 2 .

Oaks Project." R o o m 304, Johnson

MEDICAL HISTORY LECTURE:

K E S T R E L L E C T U R E : More than a

' S C R E W E D ' : A couple of "beautiful

Building, Middlebury College, 4:30

Dr. John Bland puts anti-aging inter-

decade ago, the Mauritius kestrel was

losers" end their search for salvation in

p.m. Free. Info, 4 4 3 - 5 0 0 7 .

ests aside to examine controversial

the rarest bird in the world. Art

the new play by Burlington playwright

L I F E D R A W I N G : Live models give

"alternative" therapies such as home-

Blundell shares his experience manag-

Stephen Goldberg. Off-Center for the

artists an opportunity to work directly

opathy and acupuncture. Hall A,

N E W N I L E O R C H E S T R A : Addison

music

ing the island bird population.

Dramatic Arts, 7 3 Church St.,

from nature. Burlington College, 6:30-

Given Building, U V M , Burlington,

C o u n t y meets Ethopian-flavored Afro-

Montshire M u s e u m of Science,

Burlington, 8 p.m. Donations. Info,

9 p.m. $6. Info, 862-2898.

noon. Free. Info, 6 5 6 - 2 8 8 6 .

p o p in the last of the " M u d Season

Norwich, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 6 4 9 - 2 2 0 0 .

863-6648.

Festival" concerts. Vergennes Opera

WOMEN UNITED FORUM:

'GETTING OUT' AUDITIONS:

Candidates for Secretary o f State —

T h e Department o f Theater is seeking

words

B I O T E C H L E C T U R E : Philip Kitcher

L A Z Y W R I T E R S F O R U M : Share

looks at the philosophical side of sci-

House, 8 p.m. $6. Info, 8 7 7 - 6 7 3 7 .

ence in a lecture entitled, "Prospective

Y O L A N D A : Vermont's most musical

including Steve Howard, D e b

student and local actors for a fall pro-

your writing in progress in a supportive

Lives: Social Implications of

drag queen offers an all-original, all-

Markowitz and James Milne — answer

duction of this powerful drama by

workshop environment. Kellogg-

Contemporary Biotechnology." John

outrageous "jambalaya of soul, pop,

questions and discuss their views on

Pulitzer-winning playwright Marsha

Hubbard Library, Montpelier, 6:30

Dewey Lounge, O l d Mill, U V M ,

funk, r & b and gospel." McCullough

issues o f interest to women. Burlington

N o r m a n . Report to Royall Tyler

p.m. Free. Info, 223-.1724.

Burlington, 4 p.m. Free. Info,

Student Center, Middlebury College, 7 : 3 0 p.m. $1. Info, 8 6 5 - 0 3 8 5 .

City Hall Auditorium, 7 p.m. Free.

Theatre, U V M , Burlington, 6:30-9:30

BIRDWATCHING BANTER:

656-4042.

Info, 8 6 5 - 7 2 0 0 .

p.m. Free. Info, 6 5 6 - 0 0 8 8 .

Beginning birders and seasoned natu-

G R O U P M E D I T A T I O N : C a n mil-

' T H E BAHA'I C O M M U N I T Y ' :

film

ralists share avian anecdotes at Barnes

lions of people, focusing their minds

& Noble Bookstore, S. Burlington, 7

on inner and world peace, heal the

F R E E S P I R I T D A N C E : Movers and shakers take advantage of an evening of

Learn about a religion that emphasizes

dance

' W H E R E IS S T E P H A N I E ? ' : This dis-

p.m. Free. Info, 8 6 4 - 8 0 0 1 .

world in an instant? Give it a try at a

Joyce Hall, Champlain College,

turbing documentary by Vermonters

' O N I O N R I V E R ' P O E T S : A trinity

"world-wide meditation" in Shelburne,

unstructured dance and community.

Burlington, 7 : 3 0 p.m. Free. Info,

Bess O'Brien and Mary Arbuckle

of poets — Sue Burton, Nora Mitchell

6:30 p.m. Free. Info and location,

Chace Mill, Burlington, 8 p.m. $5. Info, 9 8 5 - 1 0 6 7 .

the spiritual unity of all mankind.

860-2653.

focuses on the mother and sister of a

and Emily Skoler — read their respec-

985-8378.

INTRO TO ACUPUNCTURE:

murdered teen. North Country Union

tive lines at the Book Rack, Champlain

D B D A W A T E R F R O N T PARTY:

Arthur Makaris introduces this "alter-

High School, Newport, 7 p.m. $7.

Mill, Winooski, 7:30 p.m. Free Info,

Permanent signage is the hot topic at a

native" therapy that can ease pain and

Info, 6 3 3 - 2 3 0 6 .

864-4226.

waterfront social with members of the

' W H E R E E V E R Y T H I N G IS EVERY-

enhance recovery rates after surgery.

' J A P A N I M A T I O N ' : These Japanese

T H I N G ' : See April 23.

cartoons promise not to make you sick.

Association. Burlington C o m m u n i t y

' S C R E W E D ' : See April 23.

C a m p u s , U V M , Burlington, 6 : 3 0 - 7

Check out one for adults, one for

kids

Downtown Burlington Development

Burgess Assembly, Medical Center

P A R E N T S A N O N Y M O U S : See April

Boathouse, 5-7 p.m. Free. Info,

'GETTING OUT' AUDITIONS: See April 2 3 .

drama

p.m. Free. Info, 8 6 5 - 2 2 7 8 .

kids. C a m p u s Center Theater, Billings

22. Chittenden County Food Shelf,

863-1175.

A . D . D . G R O U P : Adults with

Student Center, U V M , Burlington, 7

Burlington.

C H A M B E R M I X E R : T h e Lake

' T H E W I Z A R D O F O Z ' : Lyric

Attention Deficit Disorder take on the

p.m. Free. Info, 6 5 6 - 3 8 1 9 .

' T H E P U P P E T L A D Y ' : Martha Dana

Champlain Chamber of C o m m e r c e

Theater demonstrates "there is no place like h o m e " in a Vermont version of the

topic of "being organized." Frederick

' C O U R A G E T O C A R E ' : A Holocaust

and her soft-sculpture friends act out

invites the public to "tune in and see

Tuttle M i d d l e School Cafeteria, S.

candlelight memorial service follows a

traditional and contemporary tales.

what's new" at its media-minded April

musical. See "to d o " list, this issue.

Burlington, 6 : 3 0 - 8 : 3 0 p.m. Free. Info,

screening of the film. North Lounge,

Fletcher Free Library, Burlington,

mixer. Ramada Inn, S. Burlington,

Flynn Theatre, Burlington, 8 p.m. $7-

657-2655.

Billings Student Center, U V M ,

10:30-11:30 a.m. Free. Info,

5:30-7:30 p.m. $12. Info, 863-3489-

17. Info, 8 6 3 - 5 9 6 6 .

BATTERED WOMEN'S SUPPORT

Burlington, 5 p.m. Free. Info, 6 5 6 -

865-7216.

MEMORY & MENOPAUSE:

A R S E N I C A N D O L D LACE': The

G R O U P S : W o m e n Helping Battered

1153.

S T O R Y T I M E : Literature makes a

Researchers look for a connection

Barre Players recreate the comedy

Women facilitates a support group for

' B R E A K I N G AWAY': Haves and have-

splash with kids who get into The

between estrogen and Alzheimer's in a

about a couple o f charming old ladies

abused people in Burlington, 6:30-8

nots clash when four working-class

Puddle, by David McPhail. Barnes &

lecture based on a local study. Clinical

who keep their cellar stocked — with

p.m. Info, 6 5 8 - 1 9 9 6 .

townies compete against rich college

Noble Bookstore, S. Burlington, 3

Research Center, Fletcher Allen Health

corpses. Barre Opera House, 7:30 p.m.

students in a bicycle race. Loew

p.m. Free. Info, 864-8001.

Care, Burlington, 5:30-6:30 p.m. Free.

$11. Info, 4 7 6 - 8 1 8 8 .

Auditorium, H o o d Museum of Art,

S T O R Y H O U R : Kids learn from

Info, 6 5 6 - 4 5 6 0 .

' G O D M O T H E R ' : This interactive mystery puts murder on the menu. You

Dartmouth College, Hanover, N . H . , 7

lighthearted literature in a country set-

HEPATITIS-C S U P P O R T GROUP:

p.m. $6. Info, 6 0 3 - 6 4 6 - 2 4 2 2 .

ting. Flying Pig Children's Books, Ferry

Three million Americans suffer from

I N D E P E N D E N T FILM FESTIVAL:

Rd., Charlotte, 10:30 a.m. Free. Info,

this still-incurable liver disease. A sup-

C i n e m a student Josh Carlson hosts an

425-2600.

port group meets at Fanny Allen

etc

Hospital, Colchester, 6:30 p.m. Free.

evening o f Vermont-made film and

music

video shorts. R h o m b u s Gallery, 186

P E R C U S S I O N E N S E M B L E : Tom

College St., Burlington, 8 p.m. $2-6.

' T H E S T A T E O F ISRAEL': Two dis-

Info, 8 6 5 - 3 1 4 4 .

T O A S T M A S T E R S M E E T I N G : Hone

Toner conducts the Green Mountain

tinguished scholars recognize the gold-;

your leadership skills with other

Horn C l u b in a brassy performance of

art

en anniversary of Israel with lectures

wannabe speech-makers at the

on "Jerusalem in Christian History and

Econolodge Conference Center, S.

Mendelssohn, Hovhaness, Gabrieli and

Info, 4 5 3 - 5 5 3 2 .

may sympathize with the shellfish at Perry's Fish House, S. Burlington, 7:30 p.m. $10. Info, 8 6 2 - 1 3 0 0 . ' S E E H O W T H E Y R U N ' : This British farce with a case of mistaken identity will leave you laughing. Haskell Opera House, Derby Ljfle, ^ 7 : 3 0 p.m. $8. Info, 8 7 3 - 3 0 2 2 . '

film

others in the U V M Recital Hall,

G A L L E R Y T A L K : Visiting professor

T h o u g h t " and " T h e Shoah and

Burlington, 6 : 3 0 p.m. Free. Info,

Burlington, 8 p . m . Free. Info,

Gail Chin sheds curatorial light on

Establishment of Israel." McCarthy

878-3550.

656-3040.

" S o m e Rediscovered Asian Works" in

Arts Center, St. Michael's College,

April 23, Bethany Church, Montpelier,

drama

the permanent collection. Fleming

Colchester, 3 p.m. Free. Info,

7 : 3 0 p.m. $7. Info, 6 3 3 - 2 3 0 6 .

M u s e u m , U V M , Burlington, 7 p.m.

654-2535.

'BEYOND BLACK A N D WHITE': A

$3. Info, 6 5 6 - 0 7 5 0 .

GENEAOLOGY PRESENTATION:

personal exploration of bicultural heritage makes this short film a celebra-

' W H E R E E V E R Y T H I N G IS E V E R Y -

' W H E R E IS S T E P H A N I E ? ' : See

T H I N G ' : Lost Nation Theatre pre-

'JOSEPH BEUYS AT MIDDLE-

Barbara Wicker provides a leg up in

sents this new play by Stephen

B U R Y ' : German art expert Charles

"Climbing Your Family Tree." Amateur

tion of diversity. Waterman Building,

Spoonamore described as a "fast-paced

Haxthausen introduces the "social

researchers report to the Burnham

U V M , Burlington, 6-8 p.m. Free. Info,

cafeG bistro

Bar will be open April 22nd 7pm - Upm

BREAKFAST SERVED UNTIL 3 P M Eggs Benedict Belgian Waffles • Omelets Fresh Fruit Granola - Fresh Squeezed Orange juice AVAILABLE FOR PRIVATE PARTIES

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SEVEN DAYS

WM&nsfeft April 29

coming m Ji all shows $3 865-1140

ae Pot Ri All s h o w s 9:30, Never a Cover! 188 Main Street, Burlington, 658-4771

apr1 r

22V

19 98

864-0555.

R O W : Naturalist students lead a "field

and barbershop harmonies. Plainfield

boy Pierre-Augustin Caron de

' T H E B E S T YEARS O F O U R

trip" to explore the ephemeral nature

Town Hall, 8 p.m. $7. Info, 4 5 4 - 8 3 5 8 .

Beaumarchais gets the cinematic treat-

L I V E S ' : T h i s Oscar winner, by

of vernal pools. R o o m 129, Marsh Life

A L I A K B A R K H A N : T h e acclaimed

ment in this French film. Loew

William Wyler, sheds light on the reali-

Science Building, U V M , Burlington,

Indian musician performs original

Auditorium, H o o d M u s e u m o f Art,

ty of post-World War II homecoming.

1-4:30 p.m. Free. Info, 6 5 6 - 0 4 2 3 .

compositions on the beautiful and his-

Dartmouth College, Hanover, N . H . , 7

C o m m u n i t y R o o m , Burlington

' P R O M I N E N T W O M E N O F VER-

toric 25-string sarod. Mead Chapel,

& 9 : 1 5 p.m. $6. Info, 6 0 3 - 6 4 6 - 2 4 2 2 .

lar views o f Lake D u n m o r e and Silver

College, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 8 6 2 - 9 6 1 6 .

M O N T ' : Leading women in business,

Middlebury College, 8 p.m. $9. Info,

words

politics and the non profit world deal

443-6433.

Burlington, 8 a.m. Donations. Info,

at a Casino Night and silent auction to

' I O L A N T H E ' : Alumni, guest per-

words

J A C K D U B R U L R E A D I N G : The

benefit Women Helping Battered

formers and the Concert Choir team

L A N D S C A P E ' : T o m Wessels shows

Burlington author reads from his debut

Women. Inn at Essex, 7 p.m. - mid-

up to perform music from the Gilbert

slides and signs copies of his book

sport

M T . M O O S L A M O O H I K E : A short hike from the summit offers spectacuLake. Meet at the U V M Visitors Lot, 863-2433.

'READING T H E FORESTED

R O A D W A L K : Bring water, rain gear and waterproof footwear on a " m u d season" road walk. Montpelier High

thriller, about a Hawaiian succession

night. $10. Info, 6 5 8 - 3 1 3 1 .

and Sullivan operetta. U V M Recital

before a guided hike on the

plot involving a live volcano. Barnes &

A N T I - N I G E R I A RALLY: Supporters

Hall, Burlington, 8 p.m. Free. Info,

Waterworks property. Deerleap Books,

Noble Bookstore, S. Burlington, 7

of a Selective Purchasing Ordinance,

656-3040.

Bristol, 8:30 a.m. - 12:30 p.m. Free.

p.m. Free. Info, 8 6 4 - 8 0 0 1 .

that would prevent the city of

T H E W O O D S TEA COMPANY:

Info, 4 5 3 - 5 6 8 4 .

S P R I N G S T R E E T P O E T S : Gary

Burlington from doing business with

T h e acoustic power trio draws from

V E R M O N T WRITERS SERIES:

Nihsen, Juliana O'Brien, Karla Van

Nigeria, rally to draw attention to oil-

folk, Celtic and bluegrass roots to pro-

Vliet and David Weinstock share their

John Elder, Debbie Salomon, Rickey

related human rights abuses in the

duce a soothing sound at Sterling

verse before an open reading. Deerleap

Gard D i a m o n d and Jules Older read

West African nation. Shell Station,

College, Craftsbury C o m m o n , 8 p.m.

Books, Bristol, 7 p.m. Free. Info,

from respective works to benefit the

Dorset Street, S. Burlington, noon.

$5. Info, 586-7711.

453-5684.

American Association of University

Free. Info, 8 6 5 - 9 2 3 0 .

C L E A N - U P DAY: Join forces with the

kids

dance

Women. S. Burlington City Hall, 2

T O B A C C O T A L K : Judy Stephany of

p.m. $8. Info, 6 5 8 - 3 3 5 6 .

Vermont Natural Resources Council to

B A L L R O O M N I G H T S : Learn the

H O L O C A U S T P O E T S : Joseph H a h n

help clean up around the waterfront.

wonders of waltzing in a one-hour les-

and Judith Chalmer write verse that is

See "to d o " list, this issue. North Beach

son before an evening of romantic

steeped in Jewish history. T h e y read

Park, Burlington, 9 : 3 0 a.m. Free. Info,

dancing. Sunset Rooftop Ballroom,

their respective works as part of the

223-2328.

Holiday Inn Express, S. Burlington,

fourth annual "Gathering of Holocaust

GUATEMALA CONFERENCE:

8:30 p.m. $12. Info, 8 6 2 - 2 2 0 7 .

Survivor Families." Royall Tyler

Indigeneous leaders from Guatemala

OTTER CREEK CONTRAS:

Theatre, U V M , Burlington, 8 p.m.

speak of human rights abuses at a day-

the Vermont Department of Health

T E E N N I G H T : Bring an instrument

talks tobacco — and offers tips on how

to play or share, or be part of the

to decrease the risks to smoking kids.

"Friday night at the Improv" audience.

See "to d o " list, this issue. R o m a n

Westford Library, 7 : 3 0 - 9 : 3 0 p.m. Free.

Catholic Diocese of Burlington, 351

Info, 8 7 9 - 6 8 0 8 .

North Ave., Burlington, 8:30-11 a.m.

'THE MAGNIFICENT MOOSE':

$ 1 0 donation. Info, 8 6 3 - 9 6 2 6 .

Through slides, "touchables" and a life-

S C I E N C E F I C T I O N L E C T U R E : Dr.

sized silhouette, kids learn about the

Helen Haste explores the interface of

largest member of the deer family.

science and culture in a lecture enti-

Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11

tled, "Jurassic Park, Mr. Spock and Dr.

a.m. Free. Info, 8 6 5 - 7 2 1 6 .

Strangelove — T h e Mixed Moral

S T O R Y H O U R : Toddlers listen to

Metaphors." Farrell R o o m , St.

stories at the Milton Public Library,

E d m u n d s Hall, Saint Michael's

10:30 a.m. Free. Info, 8 9 3 - 4 6 4 4 .

College, Colchester, noon. Free. Info,

sport

654-2535.

long conference subtitled, "After the Peace: Fate of the Maya, Fate of the

is one of several local

Black Bonnet

literati scheduled to speak at a spring

Royal ton, 9 a.m.- 4 : 3 0 p.m. $10. Info,

$6. Info, 3 8 8 - 0 4 3 8 .

meeting of the League of Vermont

476-7056.

drama

Writers. S u m m i t Lodge, Killington

'TAKE BACK T H E N I G H T '

Resort, 9 a.m. $ 2 5 includes lunch.

M A R C H : Marchers make their way

Info, 4 5 7 - 1 1 2 0 .

from Burlington City Hall, the

kids

Women's Center and Dubie's C a f e to a Church Street rally against sexual vio-

' W H E R E E V E R Y T H I N G IS EVERYT H I N G ' : See April 23, 5 p.m.

down athletes are joined by able-bod-

Women facilitates a group in

' S C R E W E D ' : See April 23.

ied ones in a fast-paced shooting

Burlington, 9:30-11 a.m. Free. Info,

P R O J E C T : M a k e creative use of flot-

' S E A R C H F O R S I G N S . . . ' : See April

match. Champlain Elementary School,

658-1996.

sam and jetsam in a Champ-sized con-

22, 9 p.m.

struction project. Lake Champlain

' A R S E N I C A N D O L D L A C E ' : See

Basin Science Center, Burlington

April 24.

Waterfront, 1-4:30 p.m. $ 2 . Info,

' S E E H O W T H E Y R U N ' : See April

864-1848.

24, 2 & 7 : 3 0 p.m.

P O E T R Y R E A D I N G : D o u g Currier

' B Y E B Y E B I R D I E ' : Conrad Birdie is

presents poetry for children at a free

the Elvis-like singer who capitalizes on

reading with refreshments. B o o k

his sex appeal before going o f f to the

Rack/Children's Pages, Winooski, 2

Maple makers pour it on thick for

music

three days of eats and entertainment.

lence. Burlington City Hall, 5:30-8

WATERFRONT SCULPTURE

a.m. to noon on Saturday and Sunday.

p.m. Free. Info,

ST. M A T T H E W : T h e college-com-

Auditorium, 8 p.m. $10. Info,

See "to d o " list, this issue. Locations

864-4226.

munity choir and the Hanover

767-3333.

S T O R Y T I M E : Kids three and up lis-

film

ten to literature read aloud. Fletcher

Bach's choral classic. See "to d o " list,

' V E R N A L P O O L S ' : Learn about the

this issue. Spaulding Auditorium,

small, temporary bodies of water that

Hopkins Center, Hanover, N . H . , 7

serve as springtime breeding sites for some interesting creatures. See "to d o "

Montgomery, 10 a.m. - noon. $3. Info, 635-7794. S P R I N G POW-WOW: The Dawnland Center sponsors this celebration of Native American drumming, singing, dancing and crafts. Elks

Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free.

'KOLYA': This Oscar winner focuses

Info, 8 6 5 - 7 2 1 6 .

on a confirmed bachelor who finds

E N D A N G E R E D SPECIES O F VER-

p.m. $ 1 8 . 5 0 . Info, 6 0 3 - 6 4 6 - 2 4 2 2 .

himself responsible for an adorable

M O N T : Kids feast their eyes on sel-

'A P E R F E C T DAY': T h e Fyre and

five-year-old.

list, this issue. Vermont Institute of

dom-seen falcons, catamounts and

Lightning Consort performs in a vocal

Middlebury College, 4 & 7:30 p.m.

Natural Science, Montpelier, 7-9 p.m.

other elusive animals in a slide show.

work by Vermont composer Dennis

Free. Info, 4 4 3 - 6 4 3 3 .

$9. Info, 2 2 9 - 6 2 0 6 .

Montshire M u s e u m of Science,

Murphy, which incorporates elements

'BEAUMARCHAIS T H E

'HERE TODAY, G O N E T O M O R -

Norwich, 3 p.m. $5. Info, 6 4 9 - 2 2 0 0 .

of Mozartian opera, Anglican chants

S C O U N D R E L ' : Playwright and play-

Dana Auditorium,

bluebird "restoration" project involves

Hazen's N o t c h X - C Ski Area,

army. Rochester High School

C h a m b e r Orchestra compare notes in

B L U E B I R D W O R K S H O P : This building boxes from kits and setting

' T H E PASSION A C C O R D I N G T O

around St. Albans, 10 a.m. - 9 p.m.

p.m. Free. Info, 8 6 4 - 0 5 5 5 .

them out for nesting in a nearby field.

T h e pancake breakfasts run from 7

$2-12. Info, 5 2 4 - 5 8 0 0 .

L a n d . " Vermont Law School, S.

Brunet. Bring clean, soft-soled shoes to Middlebury Municipal G y m , 8 p.m.

BATTERED WOMEN'S SUPPORT

V E R M O N T M A P L E FESTIVAL:

' V E R N A L P O O L S ' : See April 24, 9 a.m. - noon.

Free. Info, 6 5 6 - 1 5 9 2 .

G R O U P : Women Helping Battered

etc

April 24, 7 a.m. - 10 p.m.

W R I T E R S S U M M I T : T h e author of

' T H E W I Z A R D O F O Z ' : See April

SATURDAY

etc

V E R M O N T M A P L E F E S T I V A L : See

Forest, Sabin Jacques and Rejean

W H E E L C H A I R B A S K E T B A L L : Sit-

660-2779.

Donations. Info, 4 7 9 - 2 3 0 4 .

Lausanne Allen calls for Richard

24.

Burlington, 7-9 p.m. $ 2 . Info,

School Parking Lot, 12:20 p.m.

Club, Barre, 11 a.m. - 5 p.m. $5. Info, 229-4033. C j \ . R . E . S . A U C T I O N : "A Magic Evening" of activist entertainment raises money for A . I . D . S . education and treatment. T h e live auction is followed by dancing. Magic H a t Performance Space, Flynn Ave., Burlington, 7 : 3 0 p.m. $25. Info, 8 6 3 - 2 4 3 7 . 'TOM TURKEY CALLING': c o n t i n u e d o n next

page

FLOWERBOYJACKKNOWSTHESECRETHANDSI m 2

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865.4563 MATTHEW RYAN

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•

Naturalist and photographer Dennis Jenson leads a turkey tracking expedition to observe breeding behavior. West Rutland, 7-10 a.m. $11. Info, 229-6206.

SUNDAY

music

T H E PASSION A C C O R D I N G T O ST. M A T T H E W : See April 25, 2 p.m. ' N E L S O N MASS': The university choir, orchestra and band combine musical forces to perform Haydn's Mass No. 9 in D minor. Ira Allen Chapel, U V M , Burlington, 3 p.m. Free. Info, 656-3040.

drama

' T H E W I Z A R D O F OZ': See April 24, 1 & 7 p.m. ' S C R E W E D ' : See April 23. 'SEARCH F O R SIGNS...': See April 22, 2 p.m.

T O O TALL, T O O S H O R T ' : This 10-minute film about the woes of womankind is screened in conjunction with an exhibit by Barbara Zucker. Fleming Museum, UVM, Burlington, 2 p.m. Free. Info, 656-2005. ' F I R S T DEADLY SIN': Check out the film version of the cop-shop drama as part of the "film, feasts and fiction" series. A potluck precedes the movie. Briggs Carriage House, Brandon, 5 p.m. Free. Info, 247-8230.

words

V E R M O N T B O O K FAIR: Look for used, rare and collectible covers at this regional conversion of bibliophiles. Ramada Inn, S. B, rlington, 9:30 a.m. 4 p.m. $2. Info, 8/8-8737. 'HEADING FOR T H E MILLENNIU M ' : Pudd'n'head Wilson, by Mark Twain, gets turn-of-the-century treatment in a book discussion group. Isley Public Library, Middlebury, 3 p.m. Free. Info, 388-4095.

kids

I N T R O T O BATS: See April 22. FLY F I S H I N G F U N : Angling for adventure? Kids get a hands-on introduction to fishing on the fly. Lake Champlain Basin Science Center, Burlington Waterfront, 1:30-3:30 p.m. $2. Info, 864-1848.

A R S E N I C A N D O L D LACE': See April 24, 2 p.m. 'BYE BYE BIRDIE': See April 25, 2 p.m.

film

'LE S A M O U R A I ' : This masterpiece of French film noir combines all the classic elements — killer, cops, underworld, woman and the code. Loew Auditorium, Hood Museum of Art, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 6:45 & 9:15 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422. T H E T R U E S T O R Y O F KASPER H O U S E R ' : A feral adult discovered in turn-of-the-century Germany is the focus of this Werner Herzog film. Rhombus Gallery, 186 College St., Burlington, 7 p.m. $2-6. Info, 865-3144.

sport

A D I R O N D A C K HIKE: Ground conditions will determine the destination of this woodsy walk on the other side of the lake. Meet at the U V M Visitors Lot, Burlington, 8 a.m. Donations. Info, 863-1145. 'WALKAMERICA': Babies benefit from this marathon "march of dimes" to raise money to fight birth defects. Burlington Boathouse, 8 a.m. Pledges. Info, 800-696-9255.

etc

V E R M O N T MAPLE FESTIVAL: See April 24, 7 a.m. - 2 p.m.

MONDAY

music

OPERA SATIRE: "Bette Midler on Benzedrine" is how some critics have described Ira Siff as he parodies the archetypal opera diva— in drag, of course. See "to do" list, this issue. Concert Hall, Middlebury College Center for the Arts, 8 p.m. $15-35. Info, 443-6433. O P E N REHEARSAL: Women compare notes at a harmonious rehearsal of the Champlain Echoes. S. Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 864-6703.

film

' T H E S U M O F US': A boisterous widower and his easy-going gay son make for comic cohabitation at Rhombus Gallery, 186 College St., Burlington, 7:30-9:30 p.m. $2-6. Info, 434-5653.

Science, Montpelier, 3:30-5 p.m. $5. Info, 229-6206.

etc

BATTERED WOMEN'S SUPPORT G R O U P S : Women Helping Battered Women facilitates a group in Burlington, 6:30-8 p.m. Free. Info, 658-1996. Also, the Shelter Committee facilitates a meeting in Montpelier, 5:30-7 p.m. Free. Info, 223-0855. HEALTH N E T W O R K M E E T I N G : Bisexual women, lesbians and transgenders convene for a health network meeting attended by a state epidemiologist. Peace & Justice Center, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 899-4588. T E E N H E A L T H C L I N I C : Teens get information, supplies, screening and treatment for sexually related problems. Planned Parenthood, Burlington, 3:30-6 p.m. Pregnancy testing is free. Info, 863-6326. E M O T I O N S A N O N Y M O U S : People with emotional problems meet at the O'Brien Center, S. Burlington, 7:30 p.m. Donations. Info, 660-9036.

words

W R I T E R S READING: Central Vermont writers Susan Ritz and Eliza Thomas read from their respective works of fiction. Horn of the Moon Cafe, Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 223-0122.

sport

O P E N F E N C I N G : Amateur fencers make their point for fitness. Bridge School, Middlebury, 7:30-9 p.m. $3. Info, 878-2902.

kids

AFTER S C H O O L ADVENTURES: Kids get familiar with the frogs found hopping and calling around Central Vermont. Vermont Institute of Natural

music

AMATEUR M U S I C I A N S O R C H E S TRA: A harmonic convergence of amateur musicians happens weekly in the Music Room, S. Burlington High School, 7:30-9:30 p.m. $5. Info, 985-9750.

dance

' L O C O M O T I O N ' : The nationally acclaimed dance company Rhythm in Shoes is seeking tappers and slappers to perform in a community "showcase" in Franklin County. Musicians are also welcome in the St. Albans City School

Gymnasium, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 652-4539.

words

' T O W A R D A M E A N I N G F U L LIFE': In his new book, Rabbi Simon Jacobson translates the ancient wisdom of the Grand Lubavitcher Rebbe into practical advice for positive change. Barnes & Noble Bookstore, S. Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 864-8001. W R I T E R S ' G R O U P : Writers work with words at Dubie's Cafe, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 865-9257.

kids

' S A L M O N S T O R I E S ' : See April 20. M U S I C W I T H ROBERT RESNIK: Kids sing songs with the musical host of VPR's "All the Traditions." Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Register, 865-7216. FLETCHER FREE GLEE CLUB: Kids five and up join the local literati — including librarian Robert Resnik — for a round of favorite songs. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 2 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. 'FATHERS & C H I L D R E N T O G E T H E R ' : Spend quality time with your kids and other dads at the Wheeler School, Burlington, 5-7 p.m. Free. Info, 860-4420. S T O R Y T I M E : Kids under three listen in at the S. Burlington Library, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 652-7080. S T O R Y H O U R : Kids between three and five engage in artful educational activities. Milton Public Library, 10:30 a.m. & 1 p.m. Free. Info, 893-4644.

etc

'SEX, LIES A N D AUDIOTAPE': Jeanne Meserve, an Emmy Award-winning anchor and correspondent for Cable News Network, asks the big question: "Is This the News?" Twilight Hall, Middlebury College, 4:30 p.m. c o n t i n u e d o n p a g e 26

VT. B razili an jiu-jitsu & Self Defense Academy ^

I S N ' T IT T I M E YOU OPENED ANOTHER DOOR TO THE FUTURE?

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Let C y b e r S k i l l s / v E R M O N T be your first step Into the information Age! Call for class schedule featuring our new 21/2 hour mmhPOWER-CtoSSeS for only 839.00 Call Today (802) 860-4057 ext. 20

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Holi

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I7I2 Shelburne Road, So. Burlington

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Seats still available for most performances with best selection on April 24 (Opening Night), 25, 26 (eve), April 30, May 1 & 2 (eve) for Lyric Theatre's

8-midnight Learn the Waltz 8:30-9:30 Enjoy more Ballroom Dances 9:30 pm... May 15th Dance & Cha Cha lesson June 12th Dance & Bolero lesson $12 per person $6 students w / I D For more Information, please call evenings

862-2207

seven is lucky.

IRBlS A p r i l 2 4 - 2 6 SC A p r i l 3 0 - M a y 3 Flynn Theatre • Burlington Experience America's favorite film brought musically and magically to life on stage. Come to Oz—where lions sing, scarecrows dance, and monkeys and witches fly—a magical entertainment event for the whole family! IT S C H E D U L E D TO A P P E A i j K A T E B E R N I E FA'DWI.CLT»<,NA-N

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1067wfzN Media support

TICKETS FOR THIS SPECIAL FUNDRAISING EVENT A R E $ 5 0 * , TICKETS ARE AVAILABLE

BY C A L L I N G T H E V S O : 8 6 4 - 5 7 4 1

A L L P R O C E E D S W I L L SUPPORT THE V E R M O N T SYMPHONY S T A T E W I D E COMMUNITY AND SCHOOL * A PORTION OF EACH TICKET IS TAX-DEDUCTIBLE

p.a g e . 2 4

CONCERTS.

$35

EXT.

AND

To Herbs ulary & e the first of on to

" H P

S A L O M O N ,

G R E T C H E N

Showcasing a cast of 6 2 supported by 2 5 musicians and 2 0 0 behind-the-scenes volunteers, this spectacular production will run for eight performances over two weekends plus a Celebrity | Benefit for the V S O * at 8 p.m. on Saturday, May 2.

$20.

12.

ORCHESTRA'S

Media support

Tickets: $7, $14, $17 • Follow the yellow brick road to the UVM Campus Ticket Store 656-3085 Flynn Regional Box Office 86-FLYNN * VSO Ticket Line 864-5741 ext 12 (Benefit Tickets: $20, $35, $50) SEVEN

DAYS

ft • Burlington IERB lours: Mon-Sat 10-6 a p r 11

22,

19-9

CLASSES AIKIDQ: Adults: Mondays - Fridays, 5:45-8 p.m.; Saturdays, 9-11:45 a .m. Children: Tuesdays &c Thursdays, 3:45-4:45 p.m. Aikido of Champlain Valley 17 E. Allen St., Winooski. $40 per month intro special. Info, 654-6999. Study this gmrefid,'flowing l

ense

art

Sunset Rooftop Ballroom, Holiday Inn Express, Shelburne Rd„ 5.

MEDITATION: First & third Sundays, 10 a.m. - noon.

Burlington. Si 2. Info, 860-1112. Learn to watlz, the featured

Burlington Shambhala Center. Free. Info, 658-6795. Instructors

dance of the night, then dance until midnight.

teach non-sectarian and Tibetan Buddhist practices.

spirit

education

WHAT IS POPULAR EDUCATION?: Sunday, April 26, 1-5

. p.m. Friends Meeting House, Burlington. $44. Info, 865-2756 ext

p.m. Peace & Justice, Center. Burlington. Free. Info. 863-2345.

5 or 863-2096. Kevin Michael of the Santa Ft Mystery School gives a guided meditation into Egypt with group interaction, chanting,

WOMEN'S CREATIVE EXPRESSION Tuesdays, April 28 to June 9, 9 a.m.-noon. Colchester. Sliding fee $130-175. Info, 8629037. Carol MacDonald leads this studio art group for women interested in exploring their creative voice. BOOK ILLUSTRATION: Saturday, May 2, 9 a.m. - 3 p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. $49. Info, 655-0231. Bonnie Ckristensen teaches all the stages of the hook illustration process, and addresses'the business of publishing.

SPECIAL EDUCATION WORKSHOP: Wednesday, Ap ri , 29, 6:30-9 p.m. Montpelier City Hall. Free. Info, 658-5315. Parents of children receiving special education services learn about recent changes

'WRITING FOR Y O U N G CHILDREN': Iwo Saturdays. April

health

25 and May 9, 9 a.m. - noon. The Book Rack, Winooski. $49. Info, 655-0231. Ruth Horowitz teaches this workshop on how to

STRESS REDUCTION CLASS: Wednesdays, 3-5 p.m.

computer

fine-tune your writing for kids.

Adolescent Family Services, 595 Dorset St., Burlington. Sliding-

CYBERSKILLS VERMONT: Ongoing day, evening and weekend

POETRY WORKSHOP: Six Mondays, April 27 to June 8, 6:30 -

fee scale. Corporate rates available. Info, 864-8095. In a 20-week

8:30 p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. $69, Info. 655-0231. Eve

session, licensed psychologist A.R. Quintiliani leads the way to less

classes. Old North End Technology Center, 279 N. Winooski

stress.

Ave., Burlington. $39-349. Info, 860-4057, ext. 20. Take classes in

INTRO TO CHIROPRACTIC: Wednesdays, 8 p.m. 200 Main

Alexandra teaches beginning and more advanced poets with txercises and strategiesforinspiration and revision. PLAYWRITING: Six Mondays, May 4 ro June 15, 6:30 - 8:30

computer basics, Windows 95, Office 97 applications, Internet or Web Street #17, Burlington. Free. Register, 862-2477. Spencer Sherman site basics. Private and custom classes are also available. makes a case for putting your spine in line. INTERNET 101: Wednesday, April 25, noon - 2 p.m. and April Burlington. Free. Info, 860-5164. A very simple overview of the

SALVES AND LOTIONS: Sunday, April 26, 1-3 p.m. Purple

online experience promises you willbe a "newbie no more. "

Shutter Herbs, 100 Main St., Burlington. $25. Register, 865-

cooking

SPRING INTO G O O D COOKING': Monday, April 27, 6-9

p.m. Isabels, Burlington, $40. Register, 865-2522. Put some

craft

AMERICAN SPATTERWORK Saturday, May 2, 2 p.m. Ethan Allen Homestead, Burlington. $15. Register, 865-4556. Lillian Carlisle leads participants in gathering natural materials and using decora/::.

creative process

Goldberg teaches thisplaywriting workshop designed around developing stimulating dialogue and interesting characters, 'MIRROR, VERB, SELF': Six Tuesdays, May 5 - June 9, 6-8:30 p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. $69. Info, 655-0231. Take this

writing course with Matthew Remski to ignite your creativity and HERB. Sarah Zettelmeyer teaches the art of making salves and lotions imagination. infused with healthfid herbs and oils.

yoga

BEGINNER'S GUIDE TO HERBS: Tuesday, April 28, 7-9 p.m. Purple Shutter Herbs, 100 Main St., Burlington. $15. Register,

spring on your plate, learn new recipesfareating well.

theptfrMdiiianal

p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. $69. Info, 655-0231. Stephen

herbs

30, 5:15-7:15 p.m. Together Networks, Flynn Avenue,

BEECHER HILL YOGA: Monday-Saturday, daytime & evening

865-HERB. Julie Manchester ofWoodsong Herbals teaches this class

classes for all levels. Info, 482-3191. Get private instruction or take

for those with little or no knowledge ofherbs.

classes in therapeutic yoga, vigorous yoga, yoga for pregnane, or yoga

language

for health and well-being. ASTANGA YOGA: Friday, April 24, 7-9:30 p.m. Burlington Yoga

'STREET SPANISH II': Six Mondays, May 4 - June 15, 7-9:30

Studio. $20. Register, 658 -YOGA. The second series study of the

p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. $69. Info, 655-0231. For those

most aerobic and rigorous approach to hatha yoga.

begin speaking confidently.

Studio. Info, 658-YOGA. Classes are offered in Astanga, Iyengar,

'SPANISH CONVERSATION I': Four Tuesdays, May 5 - May

Kripalu and Roth 5 Rhythms styles. Beginners can start any time.

jt'Wm Mthsome previous Spanish instruction, increase your-vocabulary and

T H E CREATIVE SPIRIT A N D HER SHADOWS':

BURLINGTON YOGA STUDIO: Daily, Burlington Yoga

26, 7-9 p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. $49. Info, 655-0231.

Wednesdays, 6:30-9 p.m. Burlington. $25 per week. Info, 985-

Taught primarily in Spanish this class will focus on everyday conver-

4045. Theresa Bacon leads a 12-week support group for women work-

sation and vocabulary building.

ing through blocks to their creative process.

meditation

dance

'THE WAY OF T H E SUFI': Tuesdays, 7:30-9 p.m. S.

Christi School, 100 Mansfield Ave., Burlington. $5. Info, 878-

sound and movement.

CEILI DANCE CLASS: Monday, May 4, 7-8:30 p.m.' Mater 4632. Learn Traditional Irish Country dances such as the "Rakes of Mallow" and the "Walls of Limerick. * BALLROOM DANCING: Saturday, April 25, 8:30 - 9:30 p.m.

writing

a class?

Burlington. Free. Info, 658-2447. Sufi-style meditation uses breath,

Your listing here for $7 a week.

MEDITATION: Thursdays, 7-8:30 p.m. 13 Dorset Lane, Suite 203, Wtlliston. Free. Info, 872-3797. Green Mountain Learning Center presents meditation.

Writers At The Champlain Mill

presents...

A series of low-cost, affordable classes, taught by published

professionals!

Outdoor Enthusiasts?.. The Great Outdoors page 27 V E R M O N T

S T A T E

C R A F T

C E N T E R

FROG HOLLOW O N THE MARKETPLACE, BURLINGTON

Writing for Young Children: A Follow-up Workshop with Ruth Horowitz. In this two-part workshop, you'll study some great picture books to see what makes them shine, then apply these principles to your own writing. 2 Saturdays 9am-12 pm April 25 and May 9 $49.

Poetry Workshop with Eve Alexander. This class challenges you to examine your personal relationship to language, to discover and celebrate your unique voice. We'll read the work of contemporary poets in connection with your own work of contemporary poets in connection with your own work, and discuss such concepts as imagery, metaphor, and simile. We'll also workshop poems in a supportive environment, focusing on the revision process. 6 Mondays 6:30 -8:30pm

April 27-June 8 $69.

Illustrating Picture Books with Bonnie Christensen. This course will guide you through the process of illustrating a book and will address the business of publishing. Bring a 2-3 page double-spaced manuscript (either your own story or one that has already been published), a pack of 4 x 6" unlined index cards, a pencil and an

MAY/JUNE Hearth Basket

CRAFT

CLASSES

KitSayers Sunday, 1 0 - 3 , M a y 17

Monotype Workshop Carol N. Boucher Saturday, t Q - 2,JAatf23 Pastel Landscapes Jeneane Lunn Tuesdays, 1 - 4 , june 2 - 30 W o v e n Paper Stationery Krista Willett Sunday, 1 - 5, June 7

eraser. This is all you'll need to get started on your book! / Saturday 9 - 3:30 pm May 2 $49.

THE CHAMPLAIN MILL • WINOOSKI

Please call the Book Rack at 655-0231 for more information or to request a catalog. ap r i1

2 2,

199

.SEVEN.DAYS

Custom Framing Carol N. Boucher Saturdays, 1 0 - 2 , June 13 & 27 for information or to enroll, call 8 6 3 - G 4 5 8 p a g e

Seven Days

graphic design

Brochures

Business Cards

Event Programs

Menus

Free. Info, 4 4 3 - 5 7 9 4 .

and electronics. Faulkner Recital Hall,

Barnes & Noble Bookstore, S.

DAIRY C O M P A C T HEARING:

Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College,

Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info,

T h e Northeast Dairy C o m p a c t

Hanover, N . H . , 12:30 p.m. Free.

864-8001..

Commission wants to hear from

Info, 6 0 3 - 6 4 6 - 2 4 2 2 .

farmers, vendors and consumers on

dance

the issue of increased milk production in the region. Sheraton Hotel,

' L O C O M O T I O N ' : See April 28.

April 22.

Burlington, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info,

film

S T O R I E S : Children listen, snack and

229-1941.

864-5684 255 South Champlain Street ~ Wed. thru Fri.

A f f o r d a b l e Housing • Cooperatives • Homeownership • Rental Housing

We are the Burlington Community Land Trust

^ O

"The great thing the Land Trust does is open up opportunities for people who couldn't afford it otherwise." — Tammy McFatl

z =r

Q~~

B E S S I E A W A R D S : Burlington City

Winooski, 10 a.m. Free. Info,

T h e monthly meeting of the activist

Arts hands out statuettes to local

655-1537.

group introduces a new project —

actors and filmmakers in the second

S T O R Y T I M E : Three- to six-year-olds

Action for C o m m u n i t y and Ecology

annual Oscar-styled Stage and Screen

hear tales at the Fletcher Free Library,

in the Rainforests of Central America.

Awards Dinner. See "to d o " list, this

Burlington, 10-10:45 a.m. Babies and

Peace & Justice Center, Burlington, 7

issue. Adirondack Ballroom, Radisson

toddlers listen up from 11 to 11:25

p.m. Free. Info, 8 6 3 - 0 5 7 1 .

Hotel, Burlington, 5:30 p.m. $50.

a.m. Free. Info, 8 6 5 - 7 2 1 6 .

A L Z H E I M E R ' S S E R I E S : In the

Info, 8 6 5 - 7 1 6 6 .

Come celebrate with us at our

"Raise the Roof" Benefit

D O U B L E F E A T U R E : In Eraserhead,

of the Memory Disorders Center of

a numb-brained everyman wanders

'A C E L E B R A T I O N O F C H E E S E ' :

Vermont talks about recent develop-

around a satire of modern Lynchian

See April 22. Tonights cheese whiz is

ments in diagnosis, treatment and

landscape. Divine plays a 300-pound

Kevin Kingsley from Guildford-based

research. T h e Arbors, Shelburne, 7

transvestite in Pink

K . C . Critters.

p.m. Free. Info, 9 8 5 - 8 6 0 0 .

Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins

BATTERED WOMEN'S SUPPORT

R E I K I C L I N I C : Experience an

Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover,

G R O U P S : See April 22.

ancient, non-invasive, hands-on heal-

N . H . , 6:45 & 8:35 p.m. $6. Info,

' L A N D O F C O N T R A S T S ' : Kenric

ing technique that originated in the

603-646-2422.

Kite presents slides of Bosnia and

East. Spirit Dancer Bookstore,

words

there as an English teacher. Unitarian

il ?c

Saturday, May 23, 6-9 p.m. at the Shelburne Farms Coach Barn A gala evening with the

§ |

"O ,/ Q _£) •— -S

R H O M B U S P O E T R Y S E R I E S : See April 22. "James Gero and the Artful

Info, 2 2 3 - 7 0 3 5 .

Sandy Baird offers free legal advice to

Word" is featured.

V E R M O N T H I S T O R Y DAY: Vermont students go down in history

H E T T I E J O N E S : T h e wife of LeRoi Jones — and author of the Beat

problems. R o o m 14, Burlington City

memoir How I Became Hettie Jones —

Hall, 3-5 p.m. Free. Info, 8 6 5 - 7 2 0 0 .

shows a video about her poetry work

BATTERED WOMEN'S SUPPORT

with women prisoners. Abernethy

G R O U P : Meet in Barre, 10:30 a.m. -

Room, Starr Library, Middlebury

noon. Free. Info, 2 2 3 - 0 8 5 5 .

College, 4 : 3 0 p.m. Free. Info,

® Q -§ •

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Herzegovina and talks about his work

law, housing difficulties and welfare

Unknown Blues Revue featuring | S a n d r a Wright and B i g J o e Burrell ®

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G e r r y Gover, Stanton E d d y and T a m m y M c F a l l in their living room, with their dog. Coyote

make crafts at the Children's Pages,

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kids

P A R E N T S A N O N Y M O U S : See

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Healy

rout season has arrived and

fishermen are lined up shoulder-to-shoulder on the Northeast Kingdom's Willoughby River, casting delicate flies, fresh worms and artificial lures to attract the steelhead running upstream from Lake Memphremagog. Closer to home, word's out that the Bass Masters will return to Lake Champlain next summer, and the derbytypes are already daydreaming about reeling in some of the $300,000 in prize money. Meanwhile, down at John Roy's marsh — or "crik," as he alternately calls it — not much is happening save the warble of redwinged blackbirds in the tall cattails that dominate these once-active waters. "I haven't seen anyone out there this year," says Roy, sitting on a swing overlooking the marsh from the front yard of his South Hero dairy farm. " T h e Gardner girl came by Sunday, but she ended up going to North Hero," he says in reference to his 39-year-old neighbor Rochelle Gardner. But just half a century, k Hor even a couple of decades, ago it was a different story. mile-long " Back muYithen, thar the strerete? Keelec. Bay the heart of the island was teeming with life, both wild and tame. Young kids caught hefty bullfrogs that fetched 40 cents a pound, trappers took muskrat to be made into coats, and every spring the marsh came alive with the sounds of Vermonters shooting fish. That's right, shooting fish. "When I was a boy, there were cars and cars and cars; it was nothing to have 75 or 80 cars parked out there," says the 60-year-old Roy, pointing his pipe at the dirt road adjacent to the marsh. More than a few others came by rail on the now-defunct train that ran from Burlington to Alburg, crossing the lake at the mouth of Malletts Bay. "It sounded like a small war going on down there in the marsh, it was that popular," recalls Roy. Pickerel shooting, as it's known, is a venerable tradition that harkens back to a time when most people hunted and fished for food more than sport. "Let's go back 50 or 60 years ago — there weren't the bait-casting reels there are today," Roy maintains. "People didn't have boats, but they did have boots and they did have guns and the blacksmith could make them a spear, so it was really an eco-

aPr i 1

22 ,

\ ? 98

PICKEREL,

An old tradition reel Vermonters nomical way of going down there and making a meal." The quarry are spawning fish — like northern pike and chain pickerel — that instinctively enter the shallows to lay their eggs during spring, explains Roy. The hunter's technique is similarly basic, he says. "What you do is go get up a tree; the idea is to shoot under them, the concussion is what rolls 'em over, then you get out of the tree and pick up your fish," he instructs.

is passing

for £

Gardner, the importance of the tradition is no laughing matter. "Generations have done it, my father did it, and his father before him did it," Roy says. "Growing up, it was a rite of spring, like maple sugaring," concurs Gardner. Roy, an avid sportsman, has had his share of luck catching prize salmon in Lake Champlain, as well as hunting deer and moose from the East to Alaska. He inherited his love of the outdoors — as well as the Springfield .30-06 he uses for hunting pickerel — from his father.

The flagrancy of the act, along with a rise in the stature of pike from bony "trash" fish to a coveted trophy species, have led to repeated calls to ban the practice. In fact, Vermont's the only state that allows the taking of fish with guns or spears. "The Department's on record in opposition to shooting and spearing fish," notes Angelo Incerpi, operations director of the state's Department of Fish and Wildlife.

"I seen him come out of the marsh one day and he'd rolled 14 fish with one shot," Roy remembers. "And he had one — Dad wasn't a very tall man, probably only 5'8" — and the head was up over his shoulder and the tail was flush on the ground. But we don't see that kind of northerns in there now."

At professional meetings, Incerpi admits, Vermont's March-to-May fish-hunting season is a source of constant gibes. But to native Vermonters like Roy and

Preservation of the species, say fish-hunting opponents, is one important reason to stop the shooting and spearing of pike, especially during the spawning season when they're

SEVEN DAYS

laying their young. An average northern might carry as many as 50,000 eggs, although more than 98 percent of the offspring die before they reach sexual maturity. "They're an important top-of-the-chain predator," Incerpi says, noting pike's role in controlling cull fish like carp. "We have size and daily limits on the species," he notes, adding that what Fish and Wildlife doesn't have is the political muscle to fight a Vermont tradition. "To shoot them just seems counter to that [management] objective." Roy's heard all the arguments — including safety concerns due to the unfathomable tendency of bullets to bounce off water — and he'll rebut them all. But he prefers to talk about fish — record fish. Adjusting his cap embroidered with a deer and a duck, Roy raises his stocky body from the swing and retrieves a few papers from his pick-up truck. "I just happen to have the all-time Vermont state fishing records," he announces with a smile. Then he starts to read, "Pike: Northern, 30 pounds, 8 ounces, 1977...that's a pretty good size fish — I'd bet you a dollar it was on a tipup;" In fact, it's the 15 "tipups," or simultaneous lines allowed for each ice fisherman — as well as the proliferation of commercial fishing ventures, including derbies — that have the greatest impact on fish populations, Roy argues, not the handful of traditional pickerel shooters. "If they're worried about preserving the species, they should stop the guys out there with their tip-ups," he says. "What's the difference? You catch them there or shoot 'em here, they're both gone." Gone too are the days when people hunted the marsh using food-gathering techniques passed down from the Abenaki through generations of Vermonters, Roy says. Despite the concerns of the Fish and Wildlife Department, and the abiding interest of a few younger hunters like Gardner, Roy believes pickerel shooting is a fading panel in the patchwork of traditions that make up the fabric of the state. "Some day it'll just go by the way like the dinosaurs," he says, "but it was a way of life for me." And it's a way of life Roy wants people to at least remember. Because, as he once wrote his state senator, "Real Vermonters don't milk goats, but they do shoot fish!" ®

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n 1590, a visionary tinkerer named Zacharias Jansen constructed a little machine that would have profound consequences on the way we look at the world by showing us an entirely new one. In those days people such as Galileo and Columbus were discovering new worlds all the time, but Jansen's discovery may have had the broadest impact on the future. He has enabled humans to learn more about their inner selves than all the incarnations of God, or Deepak Chopra, ever will. Many artists toil many hours to explain the core of human existence, without considering the artistic possibilities that were unleashed by Jansen's little machine — the compound microscope — 400 years ago. When Karin Weiner is not working her day job at the Vermont Studio Center in Johnson, she's examining books on cellular biology, reinterpreting scientific studies to conjure precise yet creative drawings and paintings based on photographs of the microscopic world. Though they have titles like "Portions of isolated elastic fibers from ligamentum nuchae of ox," and the magnifications of the photos are carefully listed, her "raw data drawings ' are not really raw at all. As her current exhibit at Burlington's Firehouse Gallery reveals, the "isolated elastic fibers" look like two playful layers of noodles, rippling across an archival paper much finer than a normal scientific note pad.

m i

Weiner varies the weights of her pencil lines to create a nice depth of field, and although the drawings demonstrate her eye for minutiae, they also demonstrate her mastery of materials and keen grasp of design issues. Weiner's works have more to do with art than science, and larger drawings in the second gallery at the Firehouse are even more artistically formal. But all of these drawings really are just a starting point for her paintings. A grouping of oils on gessoed paper, entitled "Figure 30 I-IV," contains a series of worm-like forms that are also found in the drawings. In the page

lower right-hand painting, Weiner superimposes wiggling lines — etched onto the painting's surface when it was wet — over a pattern of splashes that seems to float like anenomes behind the pale squiggles. Splashes and squiggles are separated by a white film of paint that isolates each layer without imposing a middle ground. Many of the oil-on-canvas works are single sheets of painted cells splayed across a uniform field, like fishing nets upon a beach. In pieces such as the "Untitled Reproductions," the strength of Weiner's long and obsessive brush work, and unusual color combinations (such as Caucasian flesh tones

over avocado), are enough to carry the image. Good thing, too, because they consist of no other ingredients. The two "Reproductions" are as simple as the larger paintings of the show, built in layered hexagons, are complex. Weiner's unwavering lines engineer rhythms that confound traditional notions of space. Each layer of these interconnected hexagons could be calibrated against chicken wire; the layers of cells differ slightly in value as they roll across each other on the canvas. In "Magnification," veils of cells vary from matte to gloss — by blending plaster into painting mediums — to heighten the overlapping effect. The work is essentially monochromatic, greens changing from almost white to the shade of a deep, dark forest. By suspending the layers of uniform line over a black and infinite void, the piece begins to shimmer. Rarely seen in an artist s work, these minimalist cellular landscapes are as real as Provencal haystacks or the foliage of Vermont. Perhaps they should be seen and read as what they truly are: postcards from a parallel universe. (7)

" F i g . 30 x 5 0 0 , " p a i n t i n g s by K a r i n Weiner. F i r e h o u s e Gallery, Burlington. Through May 3.

-asr

LISTINGS

OPENINGS JASPER JOHNS:

PROCESS AND PRINT-

MAKING, proofs and finished prints from a leading artist of our time. Hood Museum of Art, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 603-646-2808. Lecture, "Jasper Johns: Revolution in Printmaking," by curator Wendy Weitman, and reception, April 25, 5 p.m.

LESSONS IN BLACK & WHITE, art from school

children under supervision of UVM's student art education teachers. Francis Colburn Gallery, U V M , Burlington, 656-2014. Reception April 29, 3:30-5:30 p.m. (Open only through May 2.)

O N G O I N G

H00KE0 IN THE MOUNTAINS, 200 traditional hooked rugs by contemporary fiber artists. Joslyn Round Barn, Waitsfieid, 446-3162. April 25-May 3. STONE WORK, paintings by Frank Owen and photographs by Tom Brennan. Fleming Museum, Burlington, 656-0750. Through August 2. COLO RAMA, a Caravan Arts all-ages exhibit about color. Uncommon Grounds, Burlington, 660-2724. Through May 10.. OBSESSIONAL TRANSITIONS, pottery and clay sculpture by students. Living/Learning, UVM, Burlington, 656-4200. Through May 1. FOOD RITUALS, paintings by Susan Young. A L L T H A T J A S P E R "Thoughts, experMetropolitan Gallery; Burlington, 865-7166. iments and asides" is what Jasper Johns has called : t W l g l April. ; — ^ ; * : ' , his continuously evolving printmaking. The Hood A P A W E D JOURNAL, 96 paintings and drawMusuem hosts a first-time exhibit of more than 100 ings froni;Vermont and abroad, by Carol Drury. Union Bank, Stowe, 253-8571. Through June 26, proofs and finished products — most from Johns' WATERC0L0RS by John Nutting. Axels Frame personal collection — that reveal the creative Shop,Waterbur£ '244-7801. Through April. processes of one of the most important artists of our A ROOM FOR f 0UBT, a multi-media installation time. A lecture and reception open the show this by Deftalipgrau Julian Scott Memorial Gallery, Saturday. Above, "Untitled (Blue)," 1982. Johnson State College, 635-1469. Through April 24. RELIEF DRAWINGS by Ed Owre. One-Wall Gallery, $evm Days,, Burlington, 864-5684. Through May. x ^ PATRICK LEAHY;< PHOTOGRAPHER: A Senator^ Photographs o ^ Vermont State Craft Center, Middlebury CRAFT ART^IffREPRENEURSHI Alan Potter, respectively, McAuiey Hall, * , v w FIGURE THIS.a group exhibit featuring new drawings of nudes from the model. Burlington Futon ^Company, Burlington, Through % V RECENT P p p i l M S by Robert Waldo Brunette. Chittenden Bank, Main Office, Burlington, 899-1106. Through May. - •. / ' • ' *. . ENERGY: NATURE* $ POWER,featuringmixed-media works by J o ^ Reyes and paintings and drawings by Lorna Ritz. Doll-Anstadt Gallery, Burlington, 864-3661. Through April. MUDS EAS0N BLUES, handmade prints by Roy Newton. Red Onion Cafe, Burlington, 865-2563. Through June 8. ^ '' • FIG* 30 X 500, paintings and graphite drawings by KarinWet^^and SQUATTING AS A LONGLIVED GESTURE, an installation by Meg McDevitt. Firehouse Gallery, Burlington, 865-7165. Through May 3. PAINTINGS 1988-1998, by TinkaTheresa Martell. Rose Street Gallery, Burlington, 864-3132. Through April t^VlM' ^V'; RECENT DRAWINGS AND PAINTINGS byHeidemariepass Holmes. La Brioche Cafe, Montpelier, 223-1227. Through April 25. S ^ ^ U ^ r ^ ; t / * LANDSCAPE PAINTINGS by David Smith. Phoenix Rising, Montpelier, 229-0522,Through Aj " " "

ancient tradition. & LIN0BL0 . ,

by Aran TFager.

Shelburne, 985-3848. Thro«i§tApr|L : artists in mixed media, curated by

OF THE NEW Mil

• • • • • • • n i r ; '

ts. Chaffee Cen

artist-activist shows "social abstract" works from "Flesh Journals" and "Blood r, UVM, Burlington, 656-2014. Through April 24.

... P-BASED ARTS & CRAFTS, featuring re-constructed objects of all kinds by area artists. The Restore, Montpelier, 229-1930. Ongoing. . ; ' < 1 iliil

SEVEN DAYS

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Seven Days and The Book Rack/Children's Pages in Winooski are pleased to announce the second annual competition for emerging writers in short fiction. DEADLINE FOR ENTRIES: MAY 8, 1998 MAIL MANUSCRIPTS TO: SEVEN DAYS, POB 1164, BURLINGTON, VT 05402 THE mmxvta STORY will be published " is, defined as a short story, or an in the Seven Day® Summer Fiction - ' :excerpt from a larger work if the Issue on July 1, 1998. Other winners excerpt stands on it own as a story, will be published if space allows. - The length should not surpass 4000 words. One entry per writer, please. GRAND PRIZE: a one-course tuition All entries must be typed and doublescholarship to the Summer Writing spaced. Program at the'.Uhiversity of Vermont. SECOND *IO!S»: a $500 partial scholAll entrants will be judged anonyarship to the Breadloaf Writers " mously by Seven Days staff and an Conference. esteemed panel of Vermont writers, THIRD PRIZE;fcuitioxxto any class, including Philip Baruth, David at the Book Rack Writers at .the • . - Huddle, Tom Paine, Jay Parini, Ruth Champlain Mill series. Horowitz, and New England Review ediOur thanks to these generous donors! : tor Jodee Rubins. Collectively the All prizes can be deferred one yeax. judges are affiliated with the University of Vermont, Middlebury "EMERGING WRITERS" are defined as College/ the UVM Summer Writers anyone 18 or older who has published Program and the Breadloaf Writers no more than three pieces of fiction Conference, in a newspaper, magazine or literary journal, and has published no books. Neither employees of Seven Days, Entrants must be residents of Book Rack/Children's Pages nor memVermont. bers of their families are eligible "SHORT FICTION" in this Competition for this competition.

F RO ^ "H E AD" TO* ~ To' collection of historical c Burlington, 656-0750.*: 4 0 YEARS OF PHO' of black-and-white photographs and b Miller Gallery, Waterbury, 244-5339. <

19TH AND 20TH CENTURY

AMI

landscape paintings by Vermont artists Cynthia Price and more. Clarke Gallei

FURNISHINGS

AND

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Studio/Gallery, Montpelier, 229-5899. PLEASE NOTE: Seven Days is unable to accommodate all

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in our readership area, thus these listings must be restricted to exh truly public viewing places. Art in business offices, lobbies and pri dencts or studios, with occasional ek&ptiom> will not be accepted.

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SEVEN DAYS

page

t A L k i n G simpleminded and formulaic they make a typical episode of "Three's Company" look like Bergman.

ACROSS 1 Lively round dance 6 Peter and Ivan 11 Respond, In a way 16 Ravel opus 17 Proportion 18 Baseball boo-boos 20 Candidate, sometimes 21 Bakery byproduct 22 Baseball jewel? 24 Makes a hole In one 25 Air terminal porter 27 Nothing, in Madrid 29 On — (equivalent to) 30 Former chess champ 31 Footway 32 Root of the tare 33 TV actor Robert 34 Arabian chieftain, 36 Makes public 37 Countenance 39 She loved Narcissus 40 Famous 42 Extreme hardship 43 Mortarboard decoration 45 Juan and Ho

46 Destructive insects 47 Rudely concise 48 Historic rider 51 Capital of Morocco 52 Nagged at 56 Celestial hunter 57 Jeopardy 58 Brief film appearance 59 Cry's companion 60 Drags out the speech 61 Prink or primp 62 Whimpers 63 It follows cider or divorce 64 Airport Info 65 Merchandise 66 "The truth — make you free" 67 — truck 68 Herring deHcacies 70 Becomes more sparse 71 Sea ducks 72 Some are electric 73"— Alone" (song) 74 Fiji chestnut 75 Large gully 78 Old World sandpiper 79 Sights at Giza 83 Harem

rooms 84 Wild dogs of Asia 86 Heat supplier 87 Epochal 88 Drunkard 89 Curved molding 90 Marionettemaker Tony 91 Dutch uncle 92 Spring flag 94 Line or net starter 95 Biological classifications 97 Plant used in lotions 98 Audience demands 100 Laughing 102 Hard and unyielding sing 104 Her dancin i leased e lerod 105 Where the action is 106 Salty 107 He wrote "The Highwayman" 108 Fine Italian straw 109 Broken pottery fraamer fragment DOWN 1 Kind of tapestry 2"—, my love, you do me wrong..."

The Object of My Affection, for example. This time around, the star of classics like Picture Perfect and She's the One plays a personality-free airhead who gives relationship advice to inner-city girls for a living D A N C I N G I N T H E D A R K Rudd and Aniston star in this festival of mis while she dates a guy she can't stand, gets steps from director Nicholas Hytner. pregnant by him, and THE OBJECT OF MY then tries to guilt-trip her gay AFFECTION** roommate (Paul Rudd) into Celebrities like to pat them69 Luau marrying her and acting as surhouse 3 Ring or book garlands 41 Eroded follower selves on the back for "giving rogate dad. Yeah, here's a well7 0 " — Little by use 4 Crude something back" to the public adjusted character we can all get Words" 42 Harbinger metals 71 British of spring 5 Flat hats which made them super-rich and behind. At the height of the nobleman 44 Jason's ship 6 Expanses famous. Allow me to suggest a Monica Lewinski investigation, 73 Swift 46 Areas of land message common 7 Musical way the cast of television's Bill Clinton's press secretary told 74 Lawn seed to Mars and Vaughan "Friends" can pay their debt to more believable stories. 75 Actress the moon 8 Above Perez 47 Caravan 9 Basketball society: They can all promise not T h e picture's running time is 76 Decorates asset? hoop to make any more movies. around two hours but seems 77 Papal palace 48 Poll-taker 10 Unspecified 78 Forum garb of note things Has a single talent pool ever more like at least a week. It's an 79 Unadulter49 One of the 11 Blitz, in been responsible for so boneinterminable and pointless sucated Muses football 50 Author Gore 80 Home of the headedly odious an assault on 12 Assam cession of corny, fake develop"little people" 51 Marsh silkworm the nations theaters? O K , ments, not to mention those 81 Singer Vic grasses 13 Brazilian 82 Weather Courtney Cox seems to have a 52 Removes macaw grating romantic comedy chestword water from 14 State of lick of sense and has turned up nuts. When Aniston and Rudd a boat, with 85 Sawing insensibility in one or two half-way palatable frames "out" share a meaningful afternoon at 15 Cancer and 53 German river 86 Chinese Capricorn pictures, but what's with the rest Coney Island, for instance, they gambling 54 Swiss 16 Suited of the show's ensemble? It's as game can't just ride on the regular mathemati19 Scythe 90 Plant of cian handle though they hired Jim "Ernest" rollercoaster; they have to the Cassia 55 Small, 20 Office Varney to scout Hollywood's squeeze into the cutesy kids' vergenus secluded gadget 93 Choir plum glens 23 Drivel most painfully stupid unprosion. Ever notice there's never a 94 Attica 57 Movable 26 Arm or age duced scripts and then paid outfreak amusement park accident township stage lead-in 95 Celt of the settings 28 Jewish of-work hacks to add more when you need one? Scottish 58 Large month cliches. If, in the history of cineWhat a tedious and steaming Highlands wading bird 32 "Dinner 96 Esau's wife ma, there's a more unwatchable 61 Combined at—" mountain of movie manure! I 97 See 34 (1933 movie) 62 Narrow movie than Matt LeBlancs moncan't imagine a less acceptable Across opening 35 Cowboy key-baseball comedy, Ed, it's 99 Rogers or 63 French competitions film-going experience, and seriBean matron 36 A queen of guaranteed to be something that ously doubt I will ever wish so 101 Head of 65 Fed. agents England stars David Schwimmer. Benjamin's 66 Starts in sincerely I was anywhere else in 37 Essential clan fright 38 Chopin Jennifer Aniston, meanwhile, the world. Not until the next 103 In the compositions 67 Pocket has been busy building a body of manner of gem from LeBlanc or bread 39 Italian noble big-screen work consisting Schwimmer, anyway. entirely of romantic comedies so

Last week's answers on page 33

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THE

sr a H oRTs ting scale:

B I G H I T Mark Wahlberg

m a k e s the leap f r o m Boogie

CITY OF ANGELS***

man

f r o m H o n g K o n g director K i r k Wong. Lou Diamond Phillips costars.

TARZAN AND THE LOST Starshlp

Troopers'

C a s p e r V a n D i e n is t h e l a t e s t H o l l y w o o d h u n k t o s t e p into t h e

M Y G I A N T ( N R ) Billy Crystal plays a down-on-his-luck talent agent who thinks he's found his ticket to the bigtime in a 7-foot-7-inch basketball player, in this comedy from Michael Lehmann. Kathleen Quinlan co-stars. S P E C I E S II ( N R ) Natasha Henstridge stars as a good version o f the evil space babe Sil in this sequel to die successful sci-fi thriller. This time around she tries to save the world from a deadly alien threat. With Michael Madsen and Justin Lazard. PAULIE (NR) Jay Mohr, Cheech Marin and Gena Rowlands star in the comic saga of a wisecracking parrot. John Roberts directs.

l e g e n d a r y loin cloth. T h i s t i m e around, the ape m a n s a v e s a n ancient m y s t i c a l c i t y when j u n gle developers t r y to build a W a l - M a r t . J u s t kidding a b o u t t h a t l a s t part.

SCREAM II Wes Craven d i r e c t s the j u s t r e - r e l e a s e d sequel t o h i s s h o c k i n g l y s u c c e s s f u l nouveau

Nicolas

Cage plays a heavenly spirit who gives up eternal life for a chance to get physical with Meg Ryan in the latest from Casper director Brad Silberling. MEN WITH GUNS (NR) The latest from John Sayles is a Ladn political drama set against the backdrop of Guatemala's civil war and the peasant uprising in the Chiapas region of Mexico. Federico Luppi and Damian Delgado star.

to hit m a n in t h i s a c t i o n c o m e d y

CITY

* * * * * NR = not reviewed

horror hit. N e v e

Campbell, Courtney Cox and J a d a P i n k e t t are d a m s e l s in d i s tress.

LOST IN SPACE* what a bold

concept: Turn yet another cheesy "60s show into a big-screen event and then milk it for two or three follow-up films h la Star Trek. That's the plan behind this $70 million adaptation of the goofball 1965-68 C B S series that features William Hurt, Mimi Rogers, Matt LeBlanc, and Gary Oldman as that cosmic crank Dr. Smith. Stephen Hopkins directs.

A STRANGER IN THE KINGDOM1' Adapted from the awardFLUBBER

(NR)

Robin

{ ^ W i l l i a m s s t a r s in the J o h n - H u g h e s - s c r i p t e d u p d a t e of 1961's The Absent-Minded

Professor.

Les M a y f i e l d d i r e c t s . M a r c i a G a y H a r d e n and C h r i s t o p h e r

THE ODD COUPLE (NR) Now, I

McDonald co-star. COP LAND

Sylvester Stallone

c h a n g e d his b i g - b u d g e t a c t i o n w a y s a n d h i s w a i s t l i n e - he g a i n e d 4 0 p o u n d s for t h i s role for J a m e s M a n g o l d ' s e n s e m b l e d r a m a a b o u t police c o r r u p t i o n in a s m a l l New J e r s e y town. R o b e r t DeNiro, Ray Liotta and Harvey Keitel a l s o star. MRS. BROWN

winning Howard Frank Mosher novel of the same name, Jay Craven's latest is a rollicking powerhouse of a picture that deals with racial problems which arise when a black pastor accepts a post in a quiet Vermont community. The amazing cast includes Ernie Hudson, Martin Sheen, Jordan Bayne, Bill Raymond, Carrie Snodgress, Henry Gibson and Rusty Dewees.

Billy Connolly

and O s c a r - n o m i n e e J u d i D e n c h are t e a m e d in J o h n M a d d e n ' s acclaimed a c c o u n t of the l e g e n d a r y l i a i s o n between Q u e e n

like Jack Lemmon and Walter Matthau as much as the next guy, but let's be honest: There's probably a good reason Paramount kept Neil Simon's sequel script in mothballs for the past 30 years. Howard Deutch directs this reunion of the world's most famous mismatched pair as Oscar and Felix take a road trip to their kids' wedding. Jonathan Silverman and Lisa Waltz costar. M E R C U R Y R I S I N G ( N R ) Bruce Willis plays a maverick Bureau stud who tries to protect an autistic boy whose life is sudenly at risk when he solves a secret government code. Alec Baldwin co-stars as the sinister figure on the kid's trail. With Kim Dickens and Miko Hughes.

V i c t o r i a a n d her h o r s e b a c k - r i d -

P R I M A R Y C O L O R S * * * John

ing instructor.

Travolta stars in Mike Nichols' fortuitously timed adaptation of the bestselling Joe Klein novel chronicling the

rise to power of a Clintonesque presidential candidate plagued by sex scandals. Saddam Hussein calls it "the best film since Wat the Dog" GREASE (NR) T h e John TravoltaOlivia Newton-John classic is back in celebration of the hit musical's 20th anniversary.

THE MAN IN THE IRON MASK ( N R ) Y o u may think Leonardo DiCaprio was robbed by the Academy, but don't shed too many tears for this young actor. He'll probably find consolation in the 5 percent he's taking home of litanies net profits. Not to mention the business his new film will likely do thanks to his suddenly sizzling box office cachet. Gerard Depardieu, John Malkovich and Jeremy Irons join him for this update of the Alexandre Dumas classic about a prisoner in the Bastille who's rescued by The Three Musketeers. Randall Wallace directs.

cosponsored by carburs restaurant & lounge

Y e s , t h e f a c e is f a m i l i a r , but c a n y o u p l a c e t h e m o v i e in w h i c h t h e p e r f o r m e r b e l o w p l a y e d e a c h of t h e c h a r a c t e r s s h o w n ?

GOOD WILL HUNTING*** Gus

^^^ I

AS GOOD AS IT GETS***" 2

Jack Nicholson stars as a romance novelist who enters into an unlikely romance with cofFeeshop waitress Helen Hunt in the comedy-drama from Terms of Endearment director James L, Brooks. Greg Kinnear and Cuba Gooding Jr. co-star. T I T A N I C ( N R ) Leonardo DiCaprio, Kate Winslet, Billy Zane and Kathy Bates are among the big names on board James Cameron's monumental look at modem history's most famous disaster. L.A. C O N F I D E N T I A L * * * * Based on a best-seller by crime writer James i^py, Curtis Hansons Tinseljeow^, ; thriller about big-city greed, corruption and lives colliding after a gruesome crime has captured a handful of Oscar nods — including Best Picture. THE FULL MONTY (NR) Robert Carlyle stars in the saga of a half-dozen unemployed British steehvorkers who decide to switch career paths and become strippers. Peter Cattaneo directs. T H E A P O S T L E * * * * Robert Duvall wrote, directed, produced — and snagged a Best Actor Oscar nomination — for his electrifying performance in this richly textured look at the rise and fall of a Southern Pentecostal preacher. Far rah Fawcett and Miranda Richardson co-star. WAG THE DOG*** Dustin Hoffman does his most beguiling work since Rain Man in this paranoid parable of a presidential sex scandal and a fabricated war from Barry Levinson. TWILIGHT (NR) Paul Newman plays a detective who comes out of retirement to handle a case for an old friend in the latest from Kramer vs. Kramer director Robert Benton. Gene Hackman, Susan Sarandon and Ja Garner co-star.

LaST w e E K ' S W i N n E R S

laST WEeK'S aNSwERs:

NONE

A. C A T H E R I N E B. L I N D A

MCCORMACK

FIORENTINO

DEADLINE: M O N D A Y • P R I Z E S : 10 P A I R S O F FREE P A S S E S P E R W E E K PLUS A GIFT CERTIFICATE GOOD FOR $25 WORTH OF NON-ALCOHOLIC FUN AT CARBUR'S SEND ENTRIES TO: FILM QUIZ PO BOX 68, WILLISTON, VT 05495 FAX: 658-3929 BE SURE TO INCLUDE YOUR ADDRESS. PLEASE ALLOW 4-6 WEEKS FOR DELIVERY OF PRIZES.

N I C K E L O D E O N C I N E M A S College Street, Burlington, 863-9515. The Big Hit* 12:35, 2:40, 4:50, 7:30, 10. Object of My Affection 12:45, 4, 7:10, 9:50. M e n With Guns 1, 6:45. A Stranger in the Kingdom 12:50, 4:10, 6:50, 9:30. The Odd Couple 2 12:40, 4:30, 7, 9:40.

North Avenue, Burlington, 863-6040.

Twilight 1:30, 3:20, 7:15. Kundun 1, 3:30, 6:45. L.A. Confidential 1:10, 3:40, 6:30, 9:05. Man In The Iron Mask 1:20, 7. Wag The Dog 5, 9:25. Apostle 9:15. Full Monty 5:15, 9:35.

Primary Colors 3:45, 9:20. Titanic 12:30, 4:20. 8:10. All shows daily. T H E SAVOY

Matinees Sat., Sun. Evening shows daily.

CINEMA NINE

FiLMQuIZ

Van Sam directs the story of yet another Phenomenon/Powder-styie supergenius who has trouble fitting into society. Robin Williams plays the therapist who finally gets through to him.

FILMS RUN FRIDAY, A P R I L 2 4 THROUGH T H U R S D A Y , A P R I L 3 0 ETHAN A L L E N C I N E M A S 4

the hoyts cinemas

Main Street, Montpelier, 229-0509.

Men With Guns 6:30, 9 (daily).

Shelburne Road, S. Burlington, 864-5610

At the following theaters in our area listings not available at press time. Call for info.

The Big Hit* 12:20, 2:25, 4:45, 7:25, 9:55. Tarzan & The Lost City* 12:10, 2:15, 4:25, 7:10, 9:20.

C A P I T O L T H E A T R E 93 State Street, Montpelier, 229-0343.

Object of My Affection 12:50, 3:50, 7, 9:50. Major League 3 7:15, 9:35. City of Angels 12:40, 4, 6:50, 9:45. My Giant 1. Paulie 12:15, 2:20, 4:35, 7:20, 9:25. Lost in Space 12:30, 3:40, 6:40, 9:40. Barney's Great Adventure 12, 1:40, 3:20, 5. As Good A s It Gets 3:30, 6:30, 9:30. Titanic: 2:30, 7:15. All shows daily.

S T 0 W E C I N E M A Baggy Knees Shopping Center, Stowe, 253-4678. M A D RIVER F L I C K Route 100, Waitsfield. 496-4200.

S H O W C A S E C I N E M A S O Williston Road, S. Burlington, 863-4494. Scream II 1:10, 3:40, 6:45, 9:35. Major League 3 9:40. Grease 12:40, 3:20. Species II 5:40. City of Angels 1, 4, 6:55, 9:20. Lost in Space 12:50, 3:50, 7, 9:30. Mercury Risng 7:15, 9:45. Good Will Hunting 12:30, 3:30, 6:50. Evening shows Mon.-Fri. All shows Sat.-Sun.

a p r i 1 2 2 , ; 1,9 9 8

P A R A M O U N T T H E A T R E 241 North Main Street, Barre, 479-9621.

M A R Q U I S T H E A T E R Main Street, Middlebury, 388-4841. W E L D E N THEATER

, A E.yUi l A Y S

104 No. Main Street, St. Albans, 527-7888.

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Frenzy), The Wicker Man tells the story of a British detective named Sergeant Howie (Edward Woodward) who travels to an isolated island off the west coast of Scotland to investigate the disappearance of a young woman. What Howie finds is a self-sustaining community whose progenitor cultivated both the island's agricultural productivity and the natives' pagan beliefs and practices. A Christian and a virgin, Howie is completely repulsed by the things he encounters: orgies in the graveyard, the sexual education of school children, proffered sexual prizes.

VERNAL VIEWING Bv B a r r y

Snyder

Spring movies are not all sweetness and light €3

pril is the cruelest month for cineastes. At no other time of the year is the contrast between the real world and the reel world so stark; at no other time are our impulses — one towards light, the other towards shadow — so conflicted. To desert the blooming day for the artifice of film seems like an offense against living, like some kind of sin. As a subject, spring has been inspiration for at least three films I can think of. Although not of the artistic weight or stature of either T.S. Eliot's " T h e Wasteland" nor Stravinsky's The Rite of Spring, all three films are constructed around notions of seasonal renewal and sacrifice, the inextricable linkage of life and death, and the brutality, as well as the triumph, of what Dylan Thomas called "the force that through the green fuse drives

the flower." Although varying markedly in degree of artistry and seriousness, all three films are fundamentally mythopoeic in scope and nature. That is to say, all three evoke mythic themes and material, and resonate at a deeper level within the viewer. The Wicker Man (1973) The British film The Wicker Man attracted something of a cult following on this side of the Atlantic in the decade after its premiere in 1973, and for a long while was very difficult to see. Part of the problem was the film's liberal attitude towards nudity, which made it unmarketable for television; the other part was its embrace of pagan themes. What's so disturbing and original about this film, and what made it less commercially viable, is not merely its reversal of the usual paradigm wherein good triumphs over evil and the hero emerges triumphant. There's a kind of gleeful wickedness about the film, which uses Christian complacency as its plaything. Based on an original screenplay by Anthony Shaffer (Sleuth,

The villagers make a game of his search for the missing girl, simultaneously mocking him and leading him along. The film ends with a May Day harvest celebration evocative of certain folk traditions and practices, and behind which lie the darker rituals articulated by Sir James Frazer in The Golden Bough.

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The Virgin Spring (1959) Based on the 14th-century ballad "Torres dotter i Vange," The Virgin Spring is unique among the works of Ingmar Bergman. For one, this timeless tale of rape, murder and revenge is completely unburdened by the metaphysical obfuscation and allegorical

Christianity, the birth of the new ... mythos. Reminiscent of the old order, the slaying of the virgin in fact becomes the occasion by which the new order is established, a modern religious faith in a reality that transcends Nature, the hope embodied in the story of Christ's resurrection. Bergman has, on at least one occasion (the book Bergman on Bergman), completely rejected the film. But for the viewer, The Virgin Spring remains an affecting, powerful experience. Begotten (1989) Referred to by one critic as "a metaphysical splatter film," avantgarde filmmaker Edmund Elias Merhige's Begotten is that rarest of film commodities: a movie that makes absolutely no concessions to audience taste or interest. Its high-contrast, black-and-white images are so degraded one has to strain to make them out, and nothing about what is imaged corresponds to ordinary experience. A seated figure draped in a white gown tears at its middle with a razor, pulling out pieces of black stuff from the wound. Masked figures with sticks beat and bury an eyeless, convulsing humanoid encased in cracking skin. The accompanying soundtrack is completely non-narrative: sounds of buzzing flies, dripping water, heartbeats. Begotten utilizes a three-part structure evoking three mythical characters and ideas: God Killing Himself, Mother Earth and Son of Earth-Flesh on Bone. The first two parts are suggestive of primitive cosmogonies (such as that of the Greeks): the idea of the birth of progressively differentiated life forms out of primordial prototypes. T h e second and last parts are suggestive of myths of regeneration (including the Christian): the idea of ritualized sacrifice and cosmic renewal. What makes Begotten so radical, however, is less the subject matter than Merhige's approach to it. A student of such tribal arts as aboriginal dream painting, the director's intent is not to reflect upon the primitive experience, but to recreate it through art. One watches the film with the impression of seeing through a veil, of glimpsing rituals o f indefinite antiquity and meaning. It evokes in the viewer feelings that go past conscious articulation, that lie on the level of racial memory. "Here lives the incantation of matter/A language forever," proclaims the Begotten frontispiece. T h e film abolishes the distinction between inside and outside, the reflection and its source. Merhige envisions a higher purpose for film: the union of life and art. (7)

A Christian and a virgin, Howie is completely repulsed by the things he encounters: orgies in the graveyard, the sexual education of school children, proffered sexual prizes.

Some of the impact of The Wicker Man is muted by scenes that cross the line into sheer silliness, as when the inn keeper's voluptuous daughter tries to seduce Howie through the walls of their adjoining rooms. (The sergeant sweats like a man suffering cardiac arrest and crum-

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bles to the floor; she slaps her buttocks and thighs to the rhythm of her siren song and rubs her naked body up and down the door.) O n another level, however, there's a way in which the film embraces its own nonsense as part of a tactful subversion of seriousness. In the end, the audience, like Howie, is completely unprepared for the reverse side of such frivolity. A quarter of a century after its release, The Wicker Man carries a stronger punch than many far more sophisticated horror films.

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abstraction for which the Swedish director is famous. For another, it seems to embrace a straightforward Christian faith that is everywhere contradicted by Bergman's other films. The result, in any case, is a starkly beautiful and emotionally powerful movie with the clarity and grandeur of a folk tale. N o other film I can think of is so effective in evoking not only the sensual textures of medieval life, but the superstition and terror dominating the medieval mind, against which rationality seems the feeblest of ramparts. The Virgin Spring mixes the death, rebirth and retributive myths of paganism and Christianity in a completely singular way. The rape and murder of the virgin Karin in a forest glade is reminiscent of ritual sacrifices of pagan antiquity, superstitious attempts to magically ensure the return of vegetation and renewal of life in the Spring. T h e force compelling the brutish brigands is the force that drives the budding trees — and of which the animallike promiscuity of the pregnant Ingeri is a constant reminder — but the murder seems to anger the gods, to temporarily reverse the seasonal progression, rather than the opposite. It turns cold and snows, forcing Karin's murderers to seek shelter in the house of their victim, where they themselves are ritualistically slain. When a spring miraculously bursts from the ground at the spot where Karin's body lay, her father dedicates his life to the building of a church on the spot. In a sense, the true subject of

Films courtesy ofWaterfront Video in Burlington.

The Virgin Spring is thus the transition from paganism to

page

SEVEN DAYS

apri 1

22 ,

1 9 98

Classifieds announcements

office/studio space

LIVE-OUT S U M M E R N A N N Y AVAILABLE. College grad. w/ experience. Loves swimming, hiking, biking, arts & crafts, games & wonderful adventures. Seeking family w/ kids who love the same. Has own transportation & references. Also interested in occasional evening & weekend jobs. $8/hr. 860-4605.

W A N T E D : A R T S T U D I O space with or without living accommodations near the lake in Burlington. Call collect: Clay Forms Studio, (413) 232-4349 or email: clayforms@aol.com.

looking to rent V E R M O N T STAGE COMPANY seeks donation of garage apartments or condos for 6 weeks (6/17/13) to house artists for big production of Amadeus at the Flynn. Please call 656-4351.

N E E D RELIABLE H O U S E / P E T S I T T E R O R CARETAKER? Graphic design/fine art student working in Burlington this summer willing to watch & care for house/animals & do upkeep/light maintenance in exchange for place to stay. Lots of references. (716) 272-9749, ask for Steve. Or email: sjw3059@rit.edu.

S E E K I N G S U M M E R RENTAL. Do you have a house on the lake? Family is visiting for Aug. 1 wedding and would like to stay 1-2 weeks. Please call 425-4733.

financial services

B U R L I N G T O N : large, 1-bdrm. apt. for rent on North Prospect St. Fully furnished w/ off-street parking. Avail. 5/1 or 6/1 for summer or a year. $560/mo. Call 865-9502.

FREE C A S H G R A N T S ! College. Scholarships. Business. Medical bills. Never Repay. Toll Free 1-800218-9000 Ext. G-6908.

housemates wanted B U R L I N G T O N : M or F wanted to share 4-bdrm. apt. $200/mo. + 1/4 utils. Smoking O K . Call 864-8301.

carpentry/painting REPAIRS. R E N O V A T I O N S . Interior/Exterior. Rental Units. Doors. Windows. Siding. Insured. References. Free Estimates. Chris Hannah, 865-9813.

B U R L I N G T O N : Working couple seeks 2 housemates to share expenses. Clean people are high on the priority list! Smokers O.K. Call for info: 863-6024, ask for Chris.

real estate

B U R L I N G T O N : Medical resident seeks grad/young prof, housemates for beautiful, 4-5 bdrm. Victorian. Hdwd. firs., free laundry, parking. Close to UVM &C downtown. Nonsmokers. $300-5350 + utils. Avail. 6/1. 859-0250.

NEWLY BUILT, W I N T E R I Z E D rustic cabin with 10.27 wooded acres on Well Maintained Road in Guildhall, VT. Borders N H & White Mtn. Trails. $28,900. Call Teri, 603-788-5530.

B U R L I N G T O N : M & F and a dog looking for 3rd housemate (w/ dog?) for small house near Oakledge Park. Avail. 5/15. $200/mo. Call 865-5139.

G O V T FORECLOSED HOMES from pennies on $1. Delinquent tax, repo's, R E O s. Your area. Tollfree, 1-800-218-9000, Ext. H-6908 for current listings.

B U R L I N G T O N : Live-in mentor wanted for 10-year-old homeschooled girl. Free rent in exchange for 1 full day, plus odd hours per week. Skills in crafts (e.g. knitting, weaving, pottery), art and the natural world important as well as an active curiosity about the world in general. No smoking & no television. Call Bob or Cindy, 863-5385.

office/studio space B U R L I N G T O N : Sublet private 10x12 office from adjacent architectural firm. So. Champlain St., near waterfront. $275/mo. incl. utils. Avail, immed. 864-6693. C H I R O P R A C T O R w/ professional office space in So. Burlington looking to share with other healthcare provider(s). 865-4714 after 1:00 p.m.

B U R L I N G T O N : Seeking N S prof./grad female to share lovely old house w/ myself & charming cat. W / D , gas heat, yard. N o more pets, please. $275/mo. + 1/2 utils. Refs./dep. Avail, now. Carol, 864-0242.

O F F I C E / S T U D I O SPACE available. Unique 400sf studio/office overlooking Burlington waterfront. $350/mo. incl. utils. 658-1799.

B U R L I N G T O N : Housemate needed (summer sublet or longer) $266/mo., incl. heat & parking. If you're looking for quiet apt., call us. Paul, Art or Betsey, 862-8646. B U R L I N G T O N : Roommate wanted 5/1—9/1 for 2-bdrm. apt.; downtown, 1st floor, parking, W / D , $275/mo. +1/2 utils. Call 862-7786. B U R L I N G T O N : F or M roommate to share lg. Victorian apt. w/ 2 others. Responsible, focused, NS, no pets. 1 yr. lease. $355/mo. + heat, off-street parking. Call Dan or Adam, 865-6986. ESSEX: Private room/private bath, garage, laundry facilities & all utils. to be incl. Share w/ G W M . $300/mo. + dep. Avail. 5/1. Call 878-2593, after 6:30 p.m., M-F; after 10 a.m., Sat & Sun.

sublet available

C A S H : Have you sold property and taken back a mortgage? I'll pay cash for all your remaining payments. (802) 775-2552 x202.

housemates wanted

M A L L E T T S BAY: Share 3-bdrm. (master bdrm. avail.) next to lake. Have 2 cats, 2 bath, basement, W / D , 10 mins. to downtown Burlington. $375/mo. + 1/2 utils. 879-3536.

homebrew GROW YOUR OWN HOPS: Fuggles, Mt. Hood, Perle and more. Beer, wine & soda homebrew headquarters. Vermont Homebrew Supply. 147 E. Allen Street, Winooski. 655-2070.

buy this stuff CLOTHING: GOWNS, COCKTAIL D R E S S E S , dressy suits, sizes 4-10. Good for prom, pageant, cruise, cocktail party. Excellent condition. New & used once. $20$500. 865-0602.

WOLFF TANNING BEDS TAN AT HOME BUY DIRECT AND SAVE! COMMERCIAL/HOME UNITS FROM $199 FREE COLOR CATALOG CALL TODAY 1 -800-842-1310

wedding recepts./showers S A M U A L De C H A M P L A I N C L U B : hardwood dance floor, 2 bars, kitchen, reasonable rental and bar prices. 863-5701.

automotive TOYOTA C O R O L L A , 1993: 5-dr. wagon, 46,300 mi., 5-spd. manual, cassette, roof rack, 2 Nokia snows, $7,200. 985-9729. S E I Z E D CARS F R O M $175. Porsches, Cadillacs, Chevys, BMW's, Corvettes. Also Jeeps, 4WD's. Your area. 1-800-218-9000 Ext. A-6908 for current listings.

Cwvnedtibfv wm-cerA to iMJtond £T <*• luting ot tv te> LdtebL •

motorcycles

City. a.m. ro 4:30 , nmonTnwnu _ M U K E l U w N to lJURUNi»T O N . Do you go by FAHCMCHV? How about nding : 7:30 i m . to 4 Pm MF.O

WIN ME!!— M O T O R C Y C L E W I N ME!! New silver '97 DucatiMonster 750, to benefit North County Animal League. Tickets $10 ea. 802-888-4303. MC/Visa/ check accepted. Drawing 6/21/98.

G O I N G AWAY? I will take care of your cats. Experienced veterinary technician. Burlington, So. Burlington &C Shelburne. Lynne Matthews, 863-8403.

help wanted '98 S U M M E R HELP: Part-time at Burlington Waterfront. Area resident work; May through October. 3 or 4 hrs. weekly restocking brochure racks & local deliveries. Light cleaning/lifting. Truck. Some flexible scheduling. Organized & reliable. Enjoyable job for right person. 800-232-2196. C A N D L E LOVERS N E E D E D : Seeking consultants to represent nat'l brand of candles and decorative items for our Party Plan. N o investment. Set your own schedule. Opportunity to earn $20-$30/hr. Join in April, receive $100 in free product! Call 802-864-5628. G R O W I N G FASHION wholesaler/import co. looking for energetic, motivated and detail-oriented person to assist w/ light shipping & Department Store svc. Full-time position w/ health benefits. Wholesale/Retail exp. necessary. Please call 651-3001.

TALENTED HAIRSYLIST needed for Burlingtons

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M A R T H A S T E W A R T ' S BESTK E P T S E C R E T ? She hired someone else to do the cleaning. Call Diane H., housekeeper to the stars. 658-7458. "Honeychild, the truth shall set you free!"—Pearl Bailey.

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SWANTON to SO. BURLINGT O N . Share the ride and piece of BURLINGTON to STOWE. Why :

' " m F . (1280? C O L C H E S T E R (MALLETTS BAY) to DOWNTOWN

• - • • ' ' •: '

the 8:30 BURLINGTON to WATERBURY My- sc± blei Let's work it out together so we can share the ride! From Fri. (2I54) °

• • • ••"•••

F. (1534) SO. BURLINGTON to BURLINGTON DOWN TOWN. Share the cross-town drive M-F. Work 8 15 to 5:30 (1142)

VT TEDDY BEAR CO. Anybody want to share a commute to the V T Teddy Bear Company? I wotk there from 9 to 5 every day aod need some help in securing a ride. (2849)

S H E L B U R N E to TAFT CORNERS, WILLISTON. In need of a ride M-F. Work from 7:30 to 5:30. Can you help? (1619)

UNDERHILL to WATERBURY. I'd enjoy company on my daily commute from UnderhiiJ to the

BURLINGTON to N O R T H AVE., B U R L I N G T O N , just a hop. skip fi< a jump. I need a lift. Work from 8:00 to 2:30. (2105)

schedule is flexible, but is approx. 8 to 4:30 p.m., Mon.-Fri. (2851)

IBM S E C T I O N I need a ride! From Budmgron to Pinewood Plaza, near IBM at 7:30 a.m. I'm flexible about timing and cheerful in the morning!

SO. BURLINGTON to MONTPELIER. I work tor the V T Agcmy of Transportation and warn to set a good example. Share the ride wirh me: I travel, from So. Burlington to Montpelier ar 8:30 a.m. and return at 4:30 p.m. (2829)

i Are you M on the M N 2 shift H at IBM i

and do you live on or near Shelburne RcL? If so. I'd love to help with your commuting costs. (2856)

E S S E X t o MILTON. Break up th^ routine o^votir connnuc** Lets share driving and riding from Essex to the Milton School

864-CCTA

* »««< v .«-« OK

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RARE PART-TIME ENTRYLEVEL O P E N I N G for announcer at progressive regional commercial radio station. N o egos, please. Call Greg, weekdays, 10-12. 223-2396.

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C l a s s i f i e d s business opp. 15-YEAR ESTABLISHED JEWELRY & ACCESSORY CART on the Church St. Marketplace, Burlington. Great location, will train. 802-453-4433, mornings. MAKE SERIOUS MONEY. Home-based business w/ unlimited income. Toll-free 24-hr. message. 1-888-574-9678.

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music DJ EQUIPMENT—Gemini C D 9500 dual C D player w/ cue & pitch control, $500. Mixer: Gemini PS 626, $80. Both as good as new. 654-7306, eves.; 860-1788, days. AD ASTRA R E C O R D I N G . Relax. Record. Get the tracks. Make a demo. Make a record. Quality is high. Rates are low. State of the art equip. & a big deck w/ great views. Call (802) 872-8583. DJ FOR HIRE. Only the best sounds: jazz, roots reggae, oldschool R&B. Weddings, clubs, private parties. Company parties. Divorce parties. Call today. Collie Man Productions, 863-0482. ECLECTIC ELECTRIC ROCK trio seeks experienced, dynamic keyboardist to complete line-up & provide a broad spectrum of styles, colors and sounds. Montpelier area. 479-5568 or 229-6929. T H E K E N N E L REHEARSAL SPACE in So. Burlington has rehearsal rooms for $12/hr. or $100 up front gets you 12 hrs. rehearsal. Only O N E lockout space left! Call 660-2880. MAPLE ST. GUITAR REPAIR. Professional repairs, customizing & restorations of all fretted instruments. $$$ paid for broken guitars. Located in Advance Music building, 75 Maple St., Burl. 862-5521. B E F O R E YOU SIGN—contact an experienced entertainment lawyer. All forms of legal protection for the creative artist. Sandra Paritz, attorney, 802-426-3950.

music instruction D R U M L E S S O N S : Musicians Institute honors graduate, 20 yrs. playing, 5 yrs. teaching experience. GAry Williams, (802) 472-6819. mishima@together,net. D R U M L E S S O N S : Learn to play, not imitate. Emphasis on expressive musicianship. 8 yrs. prof. exp. Gabe Jarrett (Jazz Mandolin Project, Freefall, James Harvey), 863-9257.

Marcia S. Merrill, C P A .

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GUITAR I N S T R U C T I O N : All styles, any level. Emphasis on developing strong technique, thorough musicianship & personal style. Paul Asbell (Unknown Blues Band, Kilimanjaro, Sklar-Grippo). 8627696. PIANO I N S T R U C T I O N : Innovative approach. Develop deep relaxation, full range of dynamics and expression. Phenomenal results! A1 levels. Jeff, 863-1344.

In the Year O n e Thousand Nine Hundred Ninety-eight An Ordinance in Relation to OFFENSES, MISCELLANEOUS PROVISIONS Fletcher Free Library It is hereby Ordained by the City Council of the City of Burlington, as follows: T h a t the C o d e of Ordinances of the City of Burlington be and hereby is amended by adding new Section 21-43 thereto to read as follows: Sec. 21-43 Fletcher Free Library. (a) Prohibited Activities.

health

T h e following activities are prohibited at the Fletcher Free Library:

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(2) Defacing, destroying or misusing library property, including furniture and other furnishings. 131 Possessing open or opened intoxicants. food or beverages.

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(4) Bathing or laundering in

EXPERIENCE T H E ULTIMATE MASSAGE! Treat yourself or a friend to the incredible relaxation & effectiveness of exquisite Oriental massage with JinShin Acupressure. Assists in stress relief, injury recovery and renewed vitality. Fantastic gift! Gift certificates available. $5.00 discount with ad. Call Acupressure Massage of Burlington, J. Watkins, 425-4279. T H E R A P E U T I C MASSAGE: Swedish Esalen Body Work. Special intro rate. Gift certificates available. Call Karen Ross, 657-2573. TREAT YOURSELF T O 75 M I N U T E S OF RELAXATION. Deep therapeutic massage. Reg. session: $40. Gift certificates. Located in downtown Burl. Flexible schedule. Aviva Silberman, 862-0029.

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legais NOTICE OF ANNUAL REPORT Pursuant to Section 6 1 0 4 ( d ) o f the Internal Revenue C o d e , the annual report o f the C l i o Foundation is available by request during regular business hours within 180 days from the date of this publication at M o n t g o m e r y & Merrill, Certified Public Accountants, 110 Main Street, Burlington, V T 0 5 4 0 1 . Telephone ( 8 0 2 ) 8 6 4 - 6 5 6 5 .

D y k e s TpWafdl Out?or

(1) Disorderly behavior. Disorderly behavior shall include fighting, disturbing or harassing other patrons or staff.

restrwrn?,

(5) Sleeping in such a wat that may interfere with other people's use of the library. (6) Being barefoot or shirtless. (7) Entering unauthorized areas of the library, (8) Bringing animals, except personal assistance animals, onto the premises. (9) Leaving children, under the age of six, unattended. (10) Any behavior that disturbs or may interfere with other people's use of the ibrarv or behavior that is otherwise illegal. (b) Enforcement. (1) Prior to the issuance of any municipal complaint under (b)(2) of this section, a library department staff person or police officer shall ask any patron to stop any prohibited activity and or leave the library for the remainder of the day, (2) If the prohibited conduct continues and or the person refuses to leave the library upon request, a municipal complaint ticket shall be issued. Any violation of any provision of section 21-43 (a) shall be deemed a civil offense and shall be punishable bv a civil penalty of from fifty dollars ($50) to ($500). T h e waiver penalty for porposes of the municipal complaint (civil ticket) shall be fifty dollars. In addition to the penalty, the Court may suspend a person's privilege to use the library facilities for any period of time. T h e Co-Directors of the Fletcher Library. supervisory staff and all law enforcement officers are authorized to issue a municipal complaint for a violation of

this section, (c) Protection of library property: penalties. (1) T h e city may recover in a civil action damages for detained or damaged library property, together with costs and reasonable attorney's feesDamages may include both delinquent fines and replaccmant fees. (2) A person who willfully damages

or defaces or removes w i t h o u t a u t h o -

rization any recording, book, or object available for public use or loan from

the Fletcher Library or other repository o f p u b l i c records or d o c u m e n t s in the city or w h o detains any library p r o p e r t y for m o r e than 3 0 days after written notice to return the property has been mailed shall be fined not more than

$ 5 0 0 . 0 0 for each offense. Each piece of library material shall be a single offense. Material in [brackets] deleted. Material underlined added.

CITY OF BURLINGTON In the Year O n e Thousand Nine Hundred Ninety-eight An Ordinance in Relation to PERSONNEL Retirement Board Composition It is hereby Ordained by the City Council of the City of Burlington, as follows: T h a t the C o d e of Ordinances of the City o f Burlington be and hereby is amended by amending Sections 24-47, 24-48, 24-50 and 24-53 thereof to read as follows, all to be effective July 1, 1998: Sec. 24-47. Creation; duties generally. T h e general administration and responsibility for the proper operation of the retirement system created by this chapter shall be vested in a board of [five (5)] eight (8) members, to be known as the retirement board. Sec. 24-48. Composition. T h e retirement board shall consist of [two (2)] three (3) members appointed by the city council, [one. (1)] two (2) class A members of the system elected by the class A membership, [one (1)] two (2) class B members of the system elected by the class B membership, and the city treasurer as an ex officio member. O f the class A and class B board members, no two shall be employed at the same department. Sec. 24-50. Terms. (a) Elected members. T h e terms of the elected members shall be three (3) years, beginning July first. They shall be elected at such time and in such menner as the retirement board shall designate. (b) Appointed members. O n the first Monday in June. 1998. the City Council with Mayor presiding shall appoint two (2) members of the Retirement Board one of whom shall be an additional member of such board. One of the two (2) members appointed shall be appointed for a term of three (3) years and one o f the members shall be appointed for a term of two (2) years, each term commencing lulv 1. 1998 and continuing for the terms designated and until a successor is duly appointed, thereafter, the [The] appointment of members to the board by the city council shall be made on the first Monday in June for a term of [two (2)] three (3) years from the first day of July next succeeding. Sec. 24-53. Votes; quorum. Each member of the retirement board shall be entitled to one (1) vote. [Three (3)] Five (5) members shall constitute a q u o r u m , but [three (3)] five (5) votes shall be necessary for any resolution or action at any meeting. Material in [brackets] deleted. Material underlined added.

CITY OF BURLINGTON In the Year O n e Thousand N i n e Hundred Ninety-eight An Ordinance in Relation to Y O U T H ACCESS T O T O B A C C O It is hereby Ordained by the City Council of the City o f Burlington, as follows: T h a t the C o d e o f Ordinances o f the City of Burlington be and hereby is amended by amending Chapter 21 to add a new Article IV, Youth Access to Tobacco, to read as follows: A R T I C L E IV - Y O U T H A C C E S S TO TOBACCO

Sec. 21-60. Purpose. T h e purpose of this ordinance is to decrease the illegal use of tobacco prod-

ucts b y m i n o r s , Sec. 21-61. Findings. a. T h e purchase and/or use o f tobacco products by persons under the age of

18 in the C i t y o f B u r l i n g t o n is illegal;

b. T h e City has a substantial and important interest in reducing the likelihood o f illegal use of tobacco products by persons under the age of 18 years: c. Certain types of advertising have particular appeal to children and young people: d. Cigarette advertising appears to increase young people's risk of smoking bv affecting their perceptions of the pervasiveness, image and function of smoking: e. T h e message sent to children and young people about tobacco use needs to be clear and consistent; f. Pervasive advertising and advertising directed to youth increases the risk o f tobacco product use bv persons under the age of 18: g. Regulation of the type and number of tobacco advertisements can reasonably be expected to decrease the illegal use of tobacco products by minors; h. T h e accessibility of self-service dis-

plays, sometimes set at children's eye

level, sometimes next to candy displays, contributes to youth acceptance of

tobacco products; i. Prohibition of self-service displays increase? the amount of verbal interaction required between purchaser and clerk: j. Prohibition of self-service displays makes theft of tobacco products by minors more difficult: k. Prohibition of self-service displays can reasonably be expected to decrease

the illegal sale a £ t o b a c c o p r o d u c t s b y minors-

Sec. 21-62. Restrictions on tobacco advertising and product give-aways, (a) Indoor and outdoor tobacco advertisements to be in black and white only. (1) General Prohibition. Point-of-sale advertising o f tobacco products, bv any means other than tombstone signs is prohibited. More than two (2) tombstone 8 1/2 x 14 inch signs in or on a retail establishment is prohibited, (2) Definitions. For the purposes of this section the following definitions

shall apply;

(A) " T o m b s t o n e Sign" shall mean a sign that indicates to retail customers

that t o b a c c o p r o d u c t s are for sale, T h e

tombstone sign may display only the brand name, description, tar and nicotine content, any warning labels required by federal law, and price of the tobacco product being advertised. T h e tombstone sign shall be no larger than

8 1/2 x 14 inches, O n l y letters a n d

numbers may appear on the tombstone sign; no pictures, figures, logos, or anything else may appear on the tombstone sign. T h e letters and numbers on the tombstone sign shall be in black,

block letters a n d n u m b e r s o n a w h i t e b a c k g r o u n d , T h e letters a n d n u m b e r s

on the tombstone shall not exceed one

inch in height,

(B) "Point-of-sale Advertising" means any advertising or promotion of any kind within or upon the retail establishment of the licensee where the tobacco product is offered for sale, including but not limited to. advertis-

on displays and display r a c b . ashtrays, trash cans, catalogues, uniforms, and tshirts, or other clothing for sale. Pointof-sale advertising includes a display of any logo, brand name, character. graphics, colors, scenes, or designs that are either trademarks of a tobacco products brand or images generally associated with a particular tobacco products brand. Point-of-sale advertising does not incude the display of tobacco products or any advertisement in any book, m a g a z i n e , n e w s p a p e r o r other similar publication. (b) Publicly visible advertising within 1.000 ft. of a school property prohibit-

ei (1) General Prohibition. N o person may place or display any sign, poster,

placard, device, g r a p h i c display or other

form of textual or graphic expression, whether temporary or permanent, that advertises or promotes the use o f any tobacco product in a publicly visible location within 1.000 feet of a school property. Examples of such locations include any window, door, outside wallsidewalk umbrella, and freestanding outdoor signboard or billboard. (2) Exceptions. This subsection shall not apply to the following: (A) any sign placed on the inside, and not visible from the outside, of any

licensed seller of tobacco;

(B) any sign on tobacco product packaging or commercial vehicles actively being used to transport tobacco: (C) any sign contained on any personal item of clothing or apparel; and ( D ) any sign in or on any book,

m a g a z i n e o r similar p u b l i c a t i o n ,

(c) Product giveaways prohibited. N o person shall distribute samples of cigarette or tobacco products or promotional materials or coupons redeemable for cigarette or tobacco products or promotional materials within the City of Burlington. As used in this section, "distribute samples of cigarette or

t o b a c c o p r o d u c t s or c o u p o n s

redeemable for cigarette or tobacco products of promotional materials" means the distribution of tobacco products, coupons redeemable therefor. and tobacco promotional materials to members of the general public free of charge for the purposes of promoting

the product,

Sec. 21-63. Sponsorship of events using product names prohibited. N o manufacturer, distributer, or retailer shall sponsor or cause to be sponsored any athletic, musical, artistic or other social or cultural event, in the brand name, logo, motto, selling message, recognizable color or pattern of colors, or any other indicia of a product identification similar or identical to those used for tobacco or smokeless tobacco

products,

Sec. 21-64. Self-service tobacco sales

displays p r o h i b i t e d , N o person holding a tobacco license

within the C i t y o f B u r l i n g t o n shall display or store tobacco products where

t h o s e p r o d u c t s are accessible to c o n sumers without direct assistance bv the sales personnel. This provision applies to all tobacco product displays including: single pack displays, multi-pack displays, smokeless tobacco displays

a n d h u m i d o r displays,

Material in [brackets] deleted. Material underlined added.

ing or p r o m o t i o n i n d o o r s a n d o u t -

doors. on clocks, on grocery dividers,

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LISTElJ.yjU I OOOtfATWXW A POG UVED HERE.1HE c^i'TOlifr VARP'5 A MESJ. fSOflE COME W HERE WITHWHoteWTID PO& OUT AW OWNERS ARE t^TS. WlRMfJG/

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astrology ASTROLOGY IS A B O U T YOU, your choices, your life. Would it have lasted for 2,000 years if it didn't work? John Morden, (802) 655-9113 (Colchester, VT). READINGS BY RISA: 802-2292928. By appointment. See display ad.

Back To Wellness Chiropractic Center

Specializing in low back, neck & shoulder conditions, headaches, and carpal tunnel 187 S t Paul Street, Burlington, V T 802.864.4959

general health KNIGHT'S PHARMACY: 1-800-439-3085, St. Albans. See display ad.

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chiropractic DR. HEATHER L. DONOVAN: 864-4959, Burl. See display ad. HELPFUL HEALING CHIROPRACTIC: 862-2477, Burlington. See display ad.

800-730-6335

health coach EMPOWERING CONSULTAT I O N S for cancer, menopause, heart disease, illness, injury & troublesome conditions. Herbalist Clove Tsindle offers medicinal, nutritional & spiritual lifestyle counseling. House calls & phone consults. Sliding scale fee. 4561522 for a brochure or an appointment.

PURPLE SHUTTER HERBS: Burlington's only full service herb shop. We carry only the finest herbal products; many of them grown & produced in Vermont. Featuring over 400 bulk dried herbs & tinctures. 100 Main Street, Burlington. 865-HERB. Store hours: Monday-Saturday, 10-6. Check out our classes.

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massage LAURA LUCHINI MASSAGE: 865-1233, Burl. See display ad. KIRSTEN OLSEN: 652-0789, Burlington. See display ad. RADIANCE MASSAGE: 8644959, Burlington. See display ad.

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muscular therapy MICHAEL RUBIN, CMT: 8658029, Shelburne & So. Burlington. See display ad.

naturopathic DR. DONNA CAPLAN, N.D. is a licensed Naturopathic Physician & Midwife providing comprehensive, holistic medical care for the whole family: 'women's health care, 'pediatrics, 'natural childbirth, 'acute & chronic conditions. Burlington: Waterfront Holistic Healing Center, 8652756; Montpelier: Collaborative Healthworks, 229-2635.

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At any rate, it seems to help some people by providing the rope ladder necessary to climb out o f the pit o f depression. Often, psychiatrists ween their patients from it aiftcr several months, in the hopes that the drugs will help initially, but that talk therapy can eventually take over from drug treatment. If In addition to the psychiatric route, there are many other treatment approaches-, according to Stephanie Lylis, an activities therapist at Fletcher Allen who leads groups for people with depression or other mental illnesses. " T h e first thing is to take responsibility for your own well-being," she says. "With mood disorders, including depression a n d manic-depression, people think the recovery comes faster the more involved you are." Lylis recommends using as many different approaches to treatment as you want, provided your practitioner knows about all o f them, to prevent any contraindications. Lylis likens this theory to treating the patient like a tree: T h e more roots you have in the ground, the less likely you are to get blown over by a storm. According to Lylis, one major area for people to consider when dealing with a mental illness is nutrition. Both sugar and caffeine can make depression worse, and Lylis has seen good results in people who have given those up. Both sugar and caffeine can make you feel temporarily high, but their consumption is followed by a crash. Lylis recommends increasing intake of carbohydrates, which boost levels of serotonin, a neurotransmitter important in mood regulation. Many medications for depression also help increase serotonin, so eating more carbohydrates can help support the work these drugs are already doing. Increased serotonin levels, whether induced through drugs or otherwise, help a person regain energy, appetite and concentration, all o f which are rr

,« .

affected by depression. > "It makes it hard to be well if you don't have energy and can't concentrate," Lylis notes. "Without that, it's hard to make the lifestyle changes that will also help alleviate depression." In addition, a lack of sunlight can contribute to depression. At this time of year, we're all probably perking up simply because of the change we made in our clocks a few weeks ago. But for people who actually suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder, the results of getting more natural light can mean the difference between depression and living well, Lylis says. After getting a diagnosis, a patient is encouraged to invest in "full-spectrum lights" for the home, which mimic real sunlight. A ' ' ' e Lylis uses in her groups at Fletcher Allen is a :rapy. "Smelling lavender is not equal to -ylis cautions, U but it can be a good sup-

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ELAINE RUSSELL. MLD massage therapy gently stimulates the vacuuming and filtering (lymph) system in the body to clean away toxins, reduce inflamation, boost the immune system, reduce pain and relax deeply. 28 E. State St., Montpelier, 472-6642.

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A U N I Q U E & DYNAMIC approach to the development of greater self-awareness, flexibility, power &c precision in movement. Carolyn King, nationally certified in this method since 1987, teaches individual/group lessons. 434-5065.

MARK NASH: Know what you want, but aren't sure how to get it? Not even sure what you want? Life coaching can help you live the life you know is possible. 802482-2488.

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JIN SHIN JYUTSU. Harmonizes Spirit, Mind and Body. A simple acupressure-type practice that works at the cause level of disharmony. Experience deep relaxation, alleviation of pain, boosted immune system, release of toxins. Treatment and Self-help classes. Stephanie Surer at Pathways to Well Being, 862-8806.

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April

23-29

ARICS (Mar. 21-Apr. 19): Imagine that I'm waving a fan-shaped splay of hundred-dollar bills in front of your face. I'm teasing and provoking you with jibes. "What would you be willing to do to earn this cash, Aries?" I say. "Would you sleep with that loser down the street? Would you wear nothing but diapers and a pacifier to a party where all your friends are dressed to kill? Would you agree to squelch and distort your genius 40 hours a week, slaving away to make your boss richer and richer?" I'd hope that in doing this, Aries, I'd get you all riled up. I'd hope that you'd become inflamed with the urge to make money by doing what you totally love to do. And maybe then you'd be motivated to draw up a master plan to accomplish just that. TAURUS (Apr. 20-May 20): Expect nothing this week, but ask for everything. Gendy but gleefully smash one of your personal taboos. Jump for joy and click your heels together in a building that has always felt oppressive. Buck tradition with wit and compassion, not wrath and cynicism. Carry two gifts with you at all times in case you run into any fresh h beauties who aren't lost in their own heads. Refuse to occupy the old niches, especially the ones you've trapped yourself in for the sake of peace and harmony. Live without a leader/ witHout a role model, with no other teacher but w a r dreams. -t/r * . ' • ' r g , r ^ p j f e (May 21-June 20): It doesr 't ou're employed, and living on a couch in xx parents' spare room, or you're a p o w e r e d , jet-setting executive it eats other VI Ps for breakfast. j're going to have to slow down this ek. At least according to my rological assessment. If you're in the t category, that might mean hitting the

remote and switching to the next channel. If you're more like the second type, I advise you to be more leisurely with your prey, never finishing the kill before lunch at the earliest. CANCCR (June 21-July 22): I was approached by a company doing product placement for an upcoming movie starring Ashley Judd and Ewan McGregor. "Think of the exposure!" the rep said. "Your product will be seen again and again in theaters, video rentals, and movie channels, creating astounding name recognition." For only $120,000, he told me, Judd's character would regularly consult my horoscopes, and I'd get a cameo in the film playing myself. I might be tempted, my fellow Cancerians, if I had a spare pot of gold lying around the house. We Crabs, after all, are ripe to hit the big-time, or at least a bigger time. Truthfully, though, we shouldn't have to make any giant sacrifices to do so. to take take on on aa so. In In fact, fact, II advise advise you you to breathtaking it breathtaking new new assignment assignment only only if if it allows yourself. allows you you to to absolutely absolutely be be yourself. ICO (July 23-Aug. 22): If you had to, Leo, I bet you could strangle a 300pound leopard with your bare hands this week. You're that strong. You're that maniacal. You're that unstoppable. For that matter, you could also probably stare down your mortal enemy or pulverize your most )lock or win every game of foosball tha I can foresee just on problem: You may b e buzzing with so much power that yo u'll fritter it away on trivial or merely , :xhibirionist tasks. If I were you, I'd ch<>ose mental blockdemolition over fooi ball conquests every time. And don \ throttle any iave no other

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Home is more than the physical structure where you live. It's not just the community that supports you and the land that feels most familiar. Home is also a state of mind in which you can see with your own eyes. When you're there, your perceptions are not filtered through the biases of the people who've influenced you most. I mention this, Virgo, because it's a ripe astrological moment for you to strengthen your commitment to this version of home. Now study this gem from the 12th-century Virgoan mystic, writer and abbess, Hildegard von Bingen: "We cannot live in a world that is interpreted for us by others. An interpreted world is not a home. Part of the terror is to take back our own listening. To use our own voice. To see our own light." LIBRA

(Sept. 23-Oct. 22): If you're

ever going to find a valuable family heirloom or memento that was lost many moons ago, this will be the week. Likewise if you've had hopes of reviving a neglected dream, a squandered opportunity or a missing link: It's now or never. To what do we owe this sudden opening into the musty past? Let's just say that the i < planet of expansive pluckiness and the planet of magnetic responsiveness • (Jupiter and Venus) are currently doing the wild thing in your House of

uncanny language of the soul know that you're balancing and canceling out the follies and sins of yesteryear. (Forgive me for invoking that tacky word "sin." I'm not using it in the usual sense. In the soul's language it means "to be lazy about following one's dreams.")

you for the truly amusing funny business ahead, I have mutated the Malay proverb to convey your new astrological aspects. Please write the following in red ink on an index card PISCCS (Feb. 19-Mar. 20): A and keep it under your pillow for the Japanese computer ace named next 10 days. Don't think there are no golden apples just because the tree looks bare. Yasumasa Kanada holds the world's record for calculating the most precise value of pi, an important (though SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): impossible-to-pin-down) mathematical Who gives a cluck about global measure. Thanks to his obsessive warming, the thinning of the ozone efforts, pi is now estimated to be 3 layer, and the loss of species diversity? plus a small fraction carried out to You Sagittarians have more personal 51.5 billion decimal digits. I predict, worries, like the cooling of oncehowever, that very soon an heated passions, the thinning of your overwrought Piscean brain somewhere credibility and a loss of face. Right? in the world will make an even more Wrong. You might not want to believe exact accounting of the elusive me, but I'm telling you the honest-tonumber — perhaps to as many as a Goddess truth: The more you work on trillion decimal places. Why do I problems that mostly affect other expect this curious feat? Because the people, the less troublesome and expansive, telescopic thinking that you distracting your own private dilemmas Pisceans normally specialize in is about will be. to turn inside-out, and become acutely microscopic. If it s true that the genius CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 22-Jari. 19): You is in the details, you'll be a masterwon't need to imbibe oysters or mind. powdered powdered; rhinoceros horn to get turned on in the coming weeks, Capricorn. You are an aphrodisiac. In fact, your libido will naturally be broadcasting so many do me! subliminals that you'll probably have to to tone yourself down just to stay, stay , quasi-respectable. nrncLn»l«U!b,V,li> Don't l~Vir,V tone M n a yourself inxni down too much, though. Have at least as much lun making love as you usually do making money.

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SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Last week i would have been justified in asking you to scrawl this Malay proverb in lipstick on your bathroom mirror: Don't think there are no crocodiles just because the water is calm. This week will be a very different story, however, Scorpio. To prepare

SEVEN

DAYS

time warp you'ie entering could warp the warped part of your psyche back to normal. O f course this might be hard to explain to casual observers, They might imagine you're wrestling with imaginary dinosaurs or chatting with the flowers on the upholstery. But those of us who speak the

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to respond to a personal ad call 1 - 9 0 0 - 3 7 0 - 7 1 2 7 ^ We're open 24 hours a day! $1.99 a minute, must be 18 or older. I A M A BEAUTIFUL, BRIGHT SWPF, 25, who's athletic and musical, vivacious and introspective, ambitious and soulful. I'm seeking a S W P M , NS, 28-38, who's athletic, attractive, motivated, sensitive and expressive. 1344 35 YO BROWN-EYED GIRL SEEKING active, intelligent, attractive S W M for fun romance. I am 5*4", 130 lbs., very cute and for fun. I love animals, all sports and outdoor activities. I have a great sense of humor and intelligence, too. Can y o u keep up with me? 1346

LONDON CALLING: 2 8 YO W O M A N s e e k s special, mature man to be a friend, companion and lover. Interests I hope we share: travel, music, moving and still pictures, warm smiles and lingering glances. If you'd like to hear more, y o u know the way. 1437 SWF, BIG BROWN EYES, LONG B R O W N hair, almost 21, ISO cute, caring, clean N S S W M , 21-25. Brains a must. ISO truthful LTR. 1438 LOVED AND LOST, BUT WILLING TO TRY again. SWF, 4oish, not looking for Mr. Perfect, just s o m e o n e who is kind, caring, honest and sincere. I enjoy a variety of interests. 1413 SWF, W H O KNOWS THE MEANING OF life, ISO M, 24-37, who knows the question. Me: into tattoos, Nietzsche, alt music and prone to geekness. What's your will to power? ND, s m o k ers OK. 1419

ACTIVE, ARTISTIC, ANIMAL-LOVING, attractive DWPF s e e k s kind, communicative companion to horseback ride, kayak, bike, swim & hike while shedding s o m e middle-aged pounds. Handy, humorous, musical, honest, energetic, educated, patient and available, in Charlotte area would all be pluses. 1477 ATTRACTIVE, FIT PHYSICIAN, 35, W/ passion for work and life—yoga, dancing, hiking, singing, organic l i f e s t y l e seeking companion, 30-45, who's secure, healthy and truly available in mind, body & soul. 1444 SWF, EARLY 3 0 S , SAGITTARIUS, ISO M or BiF for jamming, philosophy, poetic rants. Bored with this town's cliquey attitude. Are you empathic, witty, jaded & authentic? 1446 SWF, 29, BEAUTIFUL ON INSIDE A S well as outside, searching for a humorous, tall, attractive M w h o loves animals and can relate to Seinfeld. Desperate I am not; curious I am. 1448 MY SECRET GARDEN BLOOMING WITH creative energy, and deriving outer beauty from an inner source, is ready to open up to a N S S/DWM, 45-50S, with heavenly vibrations, natural appeal and a vegetarian palate. 1449 SEDUCTIVELY DOMINATING LIONESS ISO alter-ego to tame me. Hip-hop girl in search of witty gent, 18-22. M a k e me laugh, I'll make y o u scream. 1452. SWPF, 41, ATTRACTIVE, CARING, happy, well-educated, s e e k s well-educated SPM, 35-45, NS/ND for mutually respectful connections: hiking, biking, arts, quiet conversations, hilarity, home-cooked meals & dining out. Friends first, LTR. Must meet approval of my cat. 1459 L E T S GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER. DWF, 43, NS/ND, s e e k s M, 35-4oish, to share nature walks, interesting talks and sometimes dinner a n d a movie. 1425 NS SWF, EARLY 3 0 S , VOLUPTUOUS, groovey kind of gal, I S O LTR with a kind, affectionate M w h o has a touch ojjravel wanderlust. 1426 STOKER S E E K S CAPTAIN for tandem road bike and more? Athletic, trim, 40s, DWPF, blonde & blue. You must like adventure, nature, humor, b o o k s , music (R&B, rock), dancing, arts, camping. H35

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BEEN DREAMING ABOUT SPRING & YOU. Please make my dreams come true. W o m a n of charm, grace and wit, 40s, looking for very special mate to share long hours together and apart. 1422 ARE YOU WITTY, FUN, ADVENTUROUS? Then I'm the gal for you! I'm 29, S W P F who's wanting a partner in crime. 1385 ATTRACTIVE, ARTISTIC DWF, 43, gent, emotionally healthy. Seeks educated M, 40-50, NS, to hold at the movies, share the Sunday Be kind-hearted, wise, witty and center. Possible LTR. 1387

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MAKE: DWPF; MODEL: 5 ' 6 " , 120 LBS., brunette; Year: Features: debt-free, balanced wheels, well-tuned, ski, sail £ bike rack. Looking to cruise along with a ' 5 5 - ' 6 3 , sporty, reliable, established model. To find out more how I run, c a l l - 1396 3 9 AND DOING FINE, BUT I'D LIKE A man around sometimes. Not to carry out the trash or fill the w o o d box. To paddle my canoe and take long walks. N S DWF. 1397 R O S E S ARE RED, S O ' S MY HAIR. KINDA pretty, let's play fair. Round & curvey, not flat and hard. Lookin' to have more than mud in my yard!! 3 4 — E n o s b u r g — Spring's about sprung. 1359 S N O W B O A R D INSTRUCTOR NEEDED! SWPF, 25, recently discovered a love for snowboarding, but needs practice. Also into music (all types), writing, outdoors and fun. Seeking friendship, possibilities. 1364 MARCH MAIDEN. ATTRACTIVE SWPF, teacher, early 30s, part lion/part lamb. Love outdoors: skiing, swimming, hiking. Seeking P M , fun, honest, adventurous, accepting of lioness and lamb. Come into my lair. 1366 DWF, 54, SLENDER, LOOKING FOR s o m e o n e w h o wants to have fun 81 a relationship. Looking for s o m e o n e who likes dancing, ocean, travelling, and is respectful and honest. 1367 BROWN-EYED BEAUTY. DPF, 40s, with p a s s i o n for living. Intelligent, cultured, classy yet down-to-earth, loving, sensual, vivacious, artistic 81 spiritually minded. ISO educated, wise, communicative, financially/emotionally secure, playful, liberal M for LTR. Let's go to the Flynn, eat at ethnic restaurants, sail, travel, enjoy nature, share conversation, listen to music and s p e n d quiet, intimate times together. 1335

BOX OF MOONLIGHT. SWF, 41, attractive, healthy, special, ISO S W M , 31-42, beautiful hair, handsome, gentle energy. Love folk/rock, alternative, bluegrass. Would love to meet musician, s o m e o n e in music industry, or loves music like me to experience the music scene with, being outdoors, full m o o n s . 1351 SWF, 43. DO YOU LIKE HIKING PEAKS, kayaking, sailing, biking or s n o w s h o e ing uncharted territories? How about dancing, theater, dining out, sunsets 81 full m o o n s ? Are you intelligent, progressive, honest, romantic, enjoy physical connection & between 35-45? I'd like to meet you. 1331 S W P F ISO S W P M FOR FRIENDSHIP. Interests must include musical theater, classic movies and wholesome fun. No smokers or drinkers, please. A sense of humor is a must! 1332 LUCIOUSLY CURVY SWF, 23, W H O does a killer Betty B o o p impression (garter included). Loves the finer aspects of all t h i n g s — m e n included. Seeking playful, lavish, sexy man, 20-30ish. 1290 DWPF, 32, 5'4", 115 LBS. NS/ND, athletic, educated, cultured, independent. Enjoys skiing, hiking, s n o w s h o e i n g (more!), quiet evenings at home (no TV), reading 81 my cats. ISO similar for friendship/LTR. 1296 SENSUAL INTELLECTUAL, FORMER NYC woman, literate, well-traveled, great sense of humor, seeks educated dance partner (over 35) to share jazz, Latin dance, films with subtitles & Soho. Interest in Eastern Religion a +. 1299 SWPF, 32, SEEKING S P M , 30-40, TO share adventures, the arts, friendship and much more... Down-to-earth, pragmatic, sincere, humorous, intelligent, independent, outdoor explorer, animal enthusiast readily sought. 1300 ATTRACTIVE COUNTRY CLUB GIRL, 39, DWF living dual personality. Enjoys skiing, sailing, hunting, camping, Cape Cod and a Harley if you've got one! I can cook for a meat/potatoes man if you put the seat down & can shovel my walkway. Can you handle me? 1303 GET TO KNOW ME. SWF, 28, looking for s o m e o n e to share warm weather activities. Enjoys swimming, volleyball and hiking. G o o d cook, too! NS and no kids preferred. Let's have fun! 1311 RENAISSANCE GARDENER S E E K S selfaware, spiritual, fit, NS, idealistic realist on a budget. Romance is nice, BUT not the main ingredient. I go for deeply d u g ground, well-turned compost, diligent weeding, prudent watering and daily prayers. 1316 SWF, 30, ISO S W M , 27-34, W H O LOVES trees, water, wildlife, Ween, farming, reading, crafts, cats, johnny Cash, Carharts, beer, Beck, whiskey, Volvos, chainsaws, fire, biting, old stuff, talking, fields, flowers, moonlight, candles, tea and rainstorms. For friendship, romance, possible LTR. 1315

COMMITTED TO FIND YOU! Sexy, g o o d looking, extremely healthy, classy, focused and committed. Enjoy workouts, running, biking, tennis, stock market, plays, classical music, concerts, nature, exotic cars and coffee. Need equivalent female life partner, 35-45ish. 1473 TOM ROBBINS; KOKO TAYLOR; JOHN Waters; Richard Brautigan; Steve Goodman; Les Blank; Patti Smith; Gilda Radner; Henry Cabot Henhouse III; R. Crumb; Professor Longhair; Brad 81 Janet. Interested? 1474

I'M S A D A N D CONFUSED. D W M , 46. Burt and Lonnie, Michael and Lisa Marie, and now Kathy Lee and Giff. Help me understand this tragic world we live in. Please call me. 1424 4 0 , UNEXPECTEDLY SINGLE AGAIN, been hibernating until metamorphosis is complete, warm, personable, active but laid-back, educated and intelligent, seeking S/DF for dinners, movies and outdoor/indoor activities. 1428 D W P M , 44, BRN./BRN., s'S", superior athletic condition, enjoys healthy living. jogging, outdoor activities, hiking, camping, fishing, financially secure. ISO attractive, fit F w/ similar interests. NS, light drinker. 1427

HEY, RAPUNZEL, LET D O W N YOUR HAIR. S W M , 39, younger in mind and appearance, 6', fun, normal, intelligent, handsome, successful with most common habits, but not a giant social rabbit. Looking for a SWF, 25-35, normal, attractive, vibrant and nice, w h o likes her food with a little spice, for a normal m o n o g a m o u s LTR. 1475

S W M , 2 9 , TALL, HEALTHY A N D FIT, enjoys biking, boating, Rotlerblading, working out, movies, dinner, etc. ISO SWCF, 25-35, NA/ND preferred. Must be caring, honest, attractive & physically fit, want to enjoy life, no games, LTR.

SOUTHERN GENTLEMAN INTELLECTUAL 5 ' n " , 37, 175 lbs., bl./bl., s m o o t h Arian, athletic, outdoors, watersports, boating, traveling, martial arts, ISO upper New England, tall, skinny girl, 27-33, tomboy, soccer player type... 1476

1439 RELOCATED D W M , 3 2 , S E E K S PARTNER, 21-25, for p a s s i o n and romance. N S only. I promise y o u won't regret it. Burlington area only. 1440 TRIM & NEAT D W M , 56, 5 ' u " , 160 lbs., enjoys politics, movies, the ocean, weekend trips, running & quiet moments. Would like to meet a lady, 48-60, w h o is not moody, honest w/ no dependents for relationship. 1429 SINGLE FATHER, 35, SEEKING SOULMATE. I enjoy music, nature, the arts and history. I'm 5*10", 180 lbs., grn./brn. eyes, dark blonde hair, and not into bar scene. Let's talk. 1441

SWM, NEW AT THIS...32. 5'9", 190 LBS., quiet, g o o d looks, g o o d s e n s e of humor, like music, dancing, dining out, reading and g o o d movies. Seeking sexy lady with similar interests w h o appreciates a real nice guy that k n o w s how to have fun! Smokers O.K., no drugs. Possible LTR. 1482 CENTRAL VT D W M , 5 ' 8 " , h o LBS. looking for slim women, 35-45, to date and possible relationship. I love the outdoors, dogs, g o o d conversation 81 candlelight dinners. All answered. 1445

S W M , 4 0 , YOUNG AT HEART, GREAT average looks, w o u l d like to meet w o m e n interested in dating for fun 81 possible LTR. I'll write a s o n g for you! 1416

YAAHH! BABY! Charming dance partner sought, 34-40, for h a n d s o m e , sweet man. 1443

SEXY, RANDY, MAN, 28, TALL, FIT, educated, erudite, seeks sexy, svelte sidekick, 21-?, for romance and recreation...cheeky monkey! 1400

YOU'RE THE NEEDLE, I'M THE THREAD. Let's make something lasting. S W D M , 42, 6', 175 lbs., fit, handsome, giving, financially secure, m o n o g a m o u s , with a great place, 40' sailboat, Flynn membership, seeks intelligent, very pretty, sensual woman, 30-40. 1450 S W M , 3 0 S , NS, ATTRACTIVE LIBRA, secure, ISO healthy, spiritual SWF. Love music, hugs, comedy, hiking, camping, concerts, pastsa, monies,'sunsets, ski : ~ ing, Phishin', travel. Desire soulmate/ best friend. Let's play life! 1454 M I S T R E S S WANTED. I am 45, 5 ' u " , W M , 155 lbs., seek WF, 26-36, must be attractive, intelligent, discreet, slim, able to travel internationally every few months, in excellent health, must enjoy active sports, fine wines, and romantic nights. 1457

29 YO

NATURIST SEEKING WF, 18-25. I'm into art, poetry, movies and the Dead. I'm a smoker, pierced and tattooed. I love to travel. If you're into possible LTR... 1411

TREAT YOURSELF! W M , 35, 5*5", 140 lbs., bm/brn, honest, clean, healthy, caring, u n a s s u m i n g or judgmental and very, very ingenious. ISO healthy WF | (MaWF OK), 18-30, for totally discreet : encounters. U R in control. Enjoy excit: ing passion! 1421 ; ; : I >

HAY COWGIRL/HAY FARMGIRL: D W M , y o u n g 40s, 5 ' u " , 165 lbs., NS/ND, handsome, fit, energetic, healthy, hardworking, loves country, animals, auctions, outdoors, ISO attractive, fit, energetic, smart country girl. 1418

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S W M , ND, JUST TURNED 4 8 , B R O W N hair, blue eyes, 5 ' n " , 195 lbs., mountain type. I enjoy hunting, fishing, camping. Like movies, dining out, dancing, quiet nights. My favorite color, blue. I believe in the American flag, hot d o g s and apple pie. A n d I have a big heart. ISO honest w o m a n , 35-49, possible LTR. 1472

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D W P M , 42, FIT, SLIM, ARTICULATE, father of one, ISO intelligent, educated PWF with s e n s e of humor to share biking, hiking, XC, b o o k s , classical music, NPR, S u n d a y NYT, family time. 1386

MY LITTLE PRINCESS, WHERE ART thou? Attractive, tall D W P M wants to shower y o u with pretty clothes, flowers and dining out. Just turned 4 0 and never had daughter to care for. 1363

W M , 34, FIT, SLENDER BUILD, LOVES music, hockey, Bove's garlic spaghetti, laughter, two-wheeled mobility, animals. ISO honest, slender, attractive, down-to-earth S/DF ISO nice guy. Spring's coming! 1381

TALL, DARK, H A N D S O M E S W M , 22, artistic, semi-exotic, mahogany-maned Leo ISO attractive, fit, intelligent w o m a n , 18-28, for informal dating, soft purring, playful nibbling, and possible relationship (Burlington area). 1334

GENTLE, FUN-LOVING, S W M , 22, s m o k er, seeks SWF, 18-32, for long talks and outdoor activities. Interested in honest LTR? I'm the one. 1388

S W M , S M O K E R , SEEKING A WOMAN, 25-35, with heart and knowledge to use it. Honesty is always best, as well as sensitivity. Independent, yet steadfast, am I; poetic, non-violent me. 1338

S M , 32, S E E K S SF, 18-23, for physical relationship. Full-figured O.K. 1382 S W P M , H A N D S O M E , EDUCATED, TALL, trim and fit. Likes skiing, s n o w s h o e i n g , all outdoor fun. In my 5 0 s with a youthful style and attitude. Likes travel, music 81 g o o d food. Seeking an attractive, fit 81 trim lady with similar interests for a quality, loving relationship. 1394

HARD-WORKING S M , EARLY 30S, hands o m e , no kids, fit, etc., seeking SF, 2145, attractive, for bowling, movies, fun and friendship, possible LTR. 1340 EDUCATED MUSICIAN, 21, INTERESTED in tattoos, body piercing and exotic animals, ISO open-minded, intelligent F, 18-25, for movies, music, snowboarding and talking over coffee. 1341

QUIET, STRAIGHT, HARD-WORKING W M , 39, looking for mature w o m a n , 25-45, w h o likes motorcycles and simple things in life. 1383

TRIPLE S C O R P I O W/ A LIGHTER HEART lives for music & dance, laughter and all things outdoors. Seeking partner in crime, 30s, for g o i n g to movies, sharing meals & general foolishness. 1343

NOVICE NEEDS TEACHER. S W M , 27, ISO older F, 30-40, for instruction in the ways of love. Interests are reading, movies and g o o d conversation. Friends first, more later? Please call! 1389 S W P M , NS, 6', W H O CANNOT BELIEVE he's 3 0 (nor can his friends), ISO slender sweetie, 25-32, w h o loves life. Never married, intelligent, educated, sincere, healthy, humorous. S o u n d similar? 1392

NICE EYES & SMILE. S W P M , 29, 5 ' 7 " , 175 lbs., attractive, fit, NS, tittle bit mild/little bit wild, seeking intelligent, self-confident, opinionated F, 23-33, for dancing, hiking and maybe more. 1345 NO COUCH POTATO! Authentic D W M , 40s, marathoner/biker s e e k s F of strorlg character/passion w h o values film, humor, travel. Slim, Jewish or kids a plus. 1348

FUN-LOVING WEIRDO. S W P M , 21, s e e k s strange and beautiful w o m a n to spoil (dancers a +). 1353

SHORT PEOPLE GOT NOBODY? 5*2", but walking tall. D W M , 41, work hard/play hard, super Dad. Successful sm. business. Like trad, jazz, blues, volleyball, skating, XC, microbrews, antiques. Progressive, well-balanced, g o o d sense of humor, thoughtful. ISO similar, selfassured F. 1349

P S W M , 32, ND/NS, BIKING, DR. LAURA show, drag racing, Rollerblading, walking & chatting, ISO PPSWF, 25-34, with similar interests. Friends first, LTR eventually. 1354 A FEW M O N T H S TO LIVE in Burlington. Looking for Green Mountain adventure before heading for greener pastures. S M , 38, tall, athletic, romantic, love arts and cooking, I S O attractive, adventurous F, 30-45. 1357

DOMINANT, INTELLECTUAL, ATHLETIC S W M , 40, s e e k s opinionated, intelligent w o m a n , 20-45, with a secret s u b missive streak. I see fully consensual, but firm, imaginative discipline in an erotic context as an expression of caring and love. Answer only if you submit from strength, not weakness. 1350

LADIES ONLY. S W M , 5 ' i o " , 168 lbs., g o o d build, w h o works hard, g o o d cook, witty, enjoys outdoors, would like to meet S/DF, fit, w h o w o u l d enjoy my s o n and a real gentleman. 1355 A FRIEND IS A GIFT Y O U GIVE YOURSELF. S W P M , 35, 6', 165 lbs., Catholic, caring, educated, travelled, s e n s e of humor, love to cook, I S O S W P F (NS/ND), 28-37, for friendship, possible ; LTR. 1356 :

RECENTLY PAROLED! Ha! Ha!, just kidding. But a s e n s e of humor is imperative to respond to this ad! Me: S W P M , 28, athletic, interests include moonlit walks, hiking, canoeing, biking, horses 81 thunderstorms. You: S/DWF, 25-32, NS, w/ similar interests. Must be able to appreciate beauty of a sunset. 1369 ISO 39 + FOR LATIN DANCING & swing, fi;esh tomatoes, prayer, water d o g s , gardening & skinny dipping. What else is there besides intimacy, sex, life and Seinfeld? 1379

p a g e

3 8

D W P M , YOUNG 40S, SENSITIVE, FIT, attractive homesteader, rural lifestyle, energetic, creative, sincere, honest. Loves outdoor recreation, exploration, companionship, intimacy. ISO F, 30-40, attractive, emotionally available, fun, fit, energetic, similarities, friend. 1352

FAIR MAIDEN, 30-40 WITH INTELLIGENCE, looks, character, s o u g h t by well-educated, h a n d s o m e , humorous, ; athletic D W M , 6', 175 lbs., for dating 1 and possible LTR. Kids OK. 1317 < < S W M , 49, NEW NURSE, ISO ATTRACTIVE, intelligent SF for socializing, pos• sible LTR. I like music, b o o k s , movies, ! dining out and a m open-minded. 1322 ; ; ; ; ; ! !

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Ribs • Ro«sserie Chicken & More! 4 p.m. - to p.m. 1110 Shetburne Rd., So. Burlington 651-8774 fat Cosmos Dlnei)

Janet. Interested?

Dear Lola, The ether day I found a huge stash of reading material

under

my lover's bed. The t&a magazines didn't faze YOUNG, VERY SUCCESSFUL L A W Y E R financially secure, learned, fit 81 stylish, spirited, generous to a fault, lover of the finer rhings in life, looking for an attractive, mature, accomplished, sens u o u s woman, 24-35, of uncommon charm &. talent, w/ w h o m to explore the many interests of his life 81 conquer the world together in a journey of unbridled pleasures, passions, & intellectual discovery. Don't pass up this sojourn of your lifetime! 1324 S W M , 30, ATHLETIC ARTICULATE, WITTY professional seeks SWPF, 24-33, who likes to laugh, is fit and intelligent, and who k n o w s the right wine 81 proper fork, but prefers occasions where neither is an issue. 1326 ROMANCE AWAITS. Flowers; wine; candlelight dinner; Pavarotti; passion; romance; become a red-hot lover in my arms. You're slender, tall, athletic, dancer? SW/AF, 2os-4oish, hot. Me? Call & find out. 1327

SUNSETS, WINE, JETHRO TULL, long walks, candlelight, jazz, nature, fireplaces, quiet times, blues, wild times, friendship, rock, LTR, beer, sunrises, Deep Purple, conversation, romance. Prog. S W M , 30, ISO SWF, 26-32. 1342

I'M A DOG. 6+ IN DOG YEARS. LOYAL and affectionate. Well-trained (I can foxtrot). S e e k i n g female to SIT! (Maybe DOWN, too!) Call me and we can go for a walk. 1399

D W M , 39, 5 ' u " , 190 LBS., DOWN-TOearth, h a n d s o m e , honest, loves outdoors, animals, sports, travel. S e e k i n g slender, g o o d - l o o k i n g F, 30-40, for life's finer pleasures. Let's explore together. No games. 1360

Professor Longhair; Brad &

S W M , 40, LOOKING FOR HUMOROUS, down-to-earth lady. Enjoy golf, movies, travelling, camping, long country rides, laughing and a g o o d cup of coffee & g o o d wine? Let's talk & see!! 1361

Aockinq women

Personal of the week wins dinner for two at

TOM R O B B I N S ; KOKO TAYLOR;

ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A S P W M , 26, who is (or working to be) open-minded, athletic, humorous, independent, emotionally healthy, cultured, self-actualizing, passionate, attractive, a great cook, caring, gnostic, silly, experienced, perceptive, educated and available? Well, here I am! I seek a woman. 1328 S W P M , 33, ROMANTIC, FIT, ATTRACTIVE and very down-to-earth, enjoys biking, weightlifting, skiing, camping, traveling, running, country music, dancing, movies, romantic walks, S u n d a y drives. D o g & horse lover. Looking for S W P gal, 25-37, enjoys dancing, with similar interests, fun, slim, attractive, NS. Possible LTR. 1329

me, but the lawn-care aoskinq

woman

COMPANION WANTED: Large, gregarious lesbian, 53, intelligent, fun-loving, enjoys strolling, g o o d food, movies, videos, ballroom dancing. I sing, do photography, art, write, meditate, do yoga, Tai Chi, love pets. Do y o u ? 1479 WOMAN, 21, INTO CIVIL DISORDER 81 general mayhem, ISO F, 18-25, to join me in my fight against the forces of evil. Or we could just watch TV. 1410 PRETTY, W A R M MaWF SEEKING similar woman for sensual friendship. I am open-minded, healthy and ready for something new. If you enjoy a woman's light touch, let's meet for dinner. 1390 MaF, 28, BICURIOUS, ISO S A M E OR single. Must like outdoors, reading, kids. No make-up, etc. No PC crap. Must be new to scene. 5 ' 5 " - 5 ' 7 " , 28-35. * 3 9 3

Asskwqmw

literature did. especially the big color photos of ride-on mowers that were stained in the same tine spray pattern as the glossies of bareassed ladies. I put everything back where I found it. Now what? Blown away in Burlington

Dear Blown,

MOST PEOPLE ASK FOR H A P P I N E S S A S condition. Happiness can only be felt if you don't set any conditions. G W M , 25, ISO LTR. Ready for happiness. You? Rutland area. 1470 ESTABLISHED GW COUPLE, EARLY 4 0 S and 50s, seek friends in the Waterbury/ Montpelier area. We're out! 1484 S W M LOOKING FOR Bi OR STRAIGHT M for occasional get-together at my place. No reciprocation necessary. Windsor County area. I'm 51, 6', 205 lbs. Be clean and discreet. 1451

If you're kind, you'll put your discovery cut of} your mind, now that you've put it back out of sight. It you're very kind, you'll escort your

PROF. MUSICIAN, 40, CURRENTLY embroiled in house building project, normally has time for skiing & skating, s e e k s dark-haired beauty w/ Cherokee cheekbones who loves to laugh when s h e dances. 1333

B i M a W P M SEEKING BiM (B a +) to share the finer things in my life with. See anything you like that interests you? 40 years young, 5 ' 6 " , 140 lbs.

and garden show, and

A W E S O M E UNINHIBITANCE. Goodnatured, heart-felt, S W M , 35, NS, 6', humorous, very giving, hard worker, honest, uninhibited & focuses on pleasing a w o m a n (my fetish). You: uninhibited, NS, enjoy dancing, laughing, dining. 1312

Mi2 ENTHUSIASTIC, SPIRITUAL, NURTURING GM: loves aikido, contradancing, outdoors, flirting, friends, garlic, writing. Mid-20S, out, Upper Valley VT. Seeking G/Bi men, 20-35, with similar interests. 1401

you're reaping the pas-

DANCING PARTNERS WANTED: Four professional M, early to mid-30s, looking for women, same age range, to meet at Burlington area dance clubs just for occasional fun evenings of dancing. 1295

THIS WORLD S O M E T I M E S IS BLISS. Exhausted kid wants to lock arms with boy who thinks feminist, can install my car stereo, get my favorite b o o k back from my ex-lover. 1407

NEW TO DATING. S W P M , 42, W H O enjoys dining, dancing, movies, boating, and outdoors. ISO F with similar interests. Possible LTR. 1297 I ' M NOT YOUR TYPICAL MALE. D W M , 35, 6 ' 4 " , looking for a funny, tall, attractive w o m a n that loves the outdoors and who doesn't have P M S three weeks out of the month, is easy going, between 21-34, and likes kids. 1302

REALLY NICE GWM, 42, 5'8", 185 LBS., seeks GWM, 25-50, in Rutland/ Middlebury area. Witty, warm, kind, sincere, interested in companionship 81 LTR. Loves dogs, kids, fun and maybe um?! 1408

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Jjola

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1-900-370-7127 $1.99 a minute. Must be 3.8 or older. SEVEN DAYS

255 SL Champlain Street " "

0«02.

april

22,

1998

•f.'-jr • •'Xy

to respond to a personal ad call I - 9 0 0 - 3 7 0 - 7 1 2 7 We're open 24 hours a day! $1.99 a minute, must be 18 or older. Aoskinq

S W M LOOKING FOR FRIENDSHIP. M U S T be willing to travel to my A d d i s o n County home. Just out of the closet; unexperienced, but eager. 18-24. 1370

L E T S WRESTLE. Looking for G/Bi/STR guys into hot wrestling action for fun & body contact. Any age or race. Me: 5*7", 140 lbs., in shape, always ready. 1323

MAGIK S O U L Vegetarian, 37, nonsmoker, crunchy kinda guy, looking for kindred spirit. 1391 MILD-MANNERED MIDDLE MANAGER BY day, lusty leatherman by night! G W M , 50, 5 ' u " , 190 lbs., bear-type bottom seeks creative, adventurous, intelligent, exclusively dominant topmen for intense, imaginative, erotic exploration. Printable interests include theater, film, classical music and g o o d conversation. Unprintable interests available upon

L E T S HEAR IT FOR THE PREMISE: Established, Burlington gay seeks the esteem of g o o d companionship. S o let's have a howl of a time of it! 1314

SEASONED OPTIMIST, EMOTIONALLY perceptive, extraordinary musician, attractive man of the world, polyglot, masculine but not macho, 59, S'IO", 154 lbs., seeks accomplished, intelligent, energetic, sensitive, genuine, adult male for playful and meaningful LTR. No smokers, fats, cats or opera lovers. 1368

ARE YOU A SENSUAL BISEXUAL W O M A N alive with energy and a daring love of ife w h o would enjoy the attention of an attractive, warm, energetic, intelligent,BiM/F couple in their 40s. 1455 SEEKING PLEASURE SEEKERS. Healthy M seeking two females w h o enjoy doing everything together. Please join me for pleasurable erotic encounters. After all, giving pleasure should equal receiving pleasure! 1447

FULL LIPS & BODY. Self-expressive, passionate, romantic F: loves movies, walks, flirting, international music, concerts, musicals, massage, dogs, garlic, nuns. Seeks w o m e n 81 men for dating, cuddling 8! experimenting. 1406

THREE'S COMPANY. Bi-curious F seeking Bi(curious)F. My husband knows and supports, I think he has an ulterior motive. Age, race and looks unimportant. Discretion expected and assured.

SEEKING BETTY. YOUR SISTER, M S . Rivers, thinks we would hit it off well, but left incomplete number. Call, you won't be sorry. 1469

MIDDLEBURY AREA, F, 23, POET, looking for women for magical friendships. Let's have a cup of tea and ponder the mysteries of life. 1412

S W M , 40, S E E K S FEMALE, ANY AGE, interested in being my sitress. Willing to clean, massage, bathe and get down on my knees for any type service. Party service, too! 1468

S W M , 40S, ISO S U B M I S S I V E F, 18-45, preferably petite/athletic, any race (B or A a +) for light B&D, erotic massage, spankings, candlelight dinners. 1414

DID YOU ANSWER AN AD FOR MAKING money in adult films or photos? If so, contact me for clean, discrete fun. Couples and bisexuals welcome. 1471

SKIPPY, DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT I said at the overnight? WelL.I still mean it. Give me a call sometime, y o u know how to reach me. Love, M. 1467 YOUR ELBOW FOUND M Y SPECIAL S P O T at Retronome, s o I loved your leg. Bananna, let's share a Budweiser. Willing to be your dancing quuen for a dollar and a half. 1483 ME: 6'1", 185 LBS., VERY WELL BUILT, eyebrow piercing, blonde hair, hazel eyes. You: streaking across Redstone green. No tan lines, very voluptuous, Please respond. Love to meet. 1478

S U S A N , YOU'RE PETITE WITH STRAIGHT, sandy-blond hair almost to your shoulders, and were working at the David Grisman show. I really enjoyed our brief conversation. A n y chance we can continue it at another show, sometime? THE S H O E ' S ON THE OTHER FOOT. Bet you're a w o m a n with feet as big as your heart. Take your many admirable attributes and start walking. Please call me on your way out. Size 10 shoe, 5 ' 6 " , 140 lbs., unembarrassable! 1481 METRONOME, FRI., 4/10, DANCING AT Deep Banana Blackout. I did say it was a pleasure to watch you (tall, intriguing blonde woman) dance. I should have said more. Are you free? 1458 SAIGON CAFE, THURSDAY, 4/6. You had the chicken soup, I had the ginger tofu. Let's meld our flavors next time... 1442 PHILLIP FROM MONTREAL, PLEASE TRY to call Judy back at same no. Best times 3-5 p.m. 1456

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ISO HIP NERD, 50-60, W H O IS KIND, curious, dignified, tends toward wanton foolishness, eschews lousy coffee and bad wine. Wants to meet smart, zany, slim 5 3 YO. Box 2 6 8

To respond to Letters Only ads: Seal your response in an envelope, write box # on the outside and place in another envelope with $5 for each response and address to: P E R S O N TO P E R S O N c/o S E V E N DAYS, P.O. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 0 5 4 0 2

ATTRACTIVE EQUESTRIENNE N E E D S stallion for sport, pleasure, breeding. Although no specific color, height, age or bloodlines required, must have quality, intelligence, ability to sire, g o o d disposition & conformation. Excellent care & conditioning provided, willing to school the right prospect. Terms negotiable, reply w/ sealed bid. Box 2 8 0 CONTENT PSWF, 37, ISO P S W M , 33-43, who is happy in either hiking boots or black tie. My interests: fly fishing, the outdoors, reading, coffee, kids, cooking, true friendships. Write! Box 2 8 3 LATE 50S, SINGLE, ATTRACTIVE, PETITE, secure, happy-go-lucky. Being alone is for the pits. Healthy, fit gentleman, 55-65, to share laughs, tender moments, would be great to meet. Box 275

* # # # •

SKIPPER SEEKING MATE FOR SAILING on cruising sloop this summer and perh a p s thereafter. S/DWPF should be articulate, romantic, well-educated & know a phillips head from an oyster fork; enjoy VPR and NYT; Forbes, New Yorker on board. Bring your own Vogue. Write something clever; you may keep the log. Box 2 8 6

QUILL FROM YOUR H E A R T S WING WRITE M E by the light of the long night's deeply blue sky taking on a rosy hue. Hot gold orange pink fire revelation through compassion. Box 267

SWF, 29, SINGLE PARENT SEARCHING for responsible, sensitive and fun-loving kinda guy. With spirit in your heart, honesty your rule, and life in your pen, drop me a line. Box 287

# J L

COSMOPOLITAN ACADEMIC WITH homesteader skills. Early retired to h o u s e building, gardening, canoeing, hiking, music, books, cooking, etc. Healthy, strong, 5 ' i o " , 160 lbs., good-looking, ISO slender, healthy, interesting, educated, 50ish friend. Box 2 7 3 I T S ALL ABOUT SHARING, COMMITMENT & LOVE. I have a super life. Would love to share it with that special woman. I'm 41, D P W M , 6', in excellent shape in body 81 mind, with grey hair 81 blue eyes, ISO petite PF w h o travels light for LTR. Box 276

REGULAR GUY. S W P M , 34, HANDSOME, fit, somewhat quirky, seeking w o m a n with body A N D brain. You're into reading, travel, skiing. Work and play hard. Stimulate your intellect with conversation and the arts. You're bright, independent, fun to be arround. You like strong coffee, hold strong opinions. Box 281

ROBUST M A N WANTED (in mind/body/ spirit) by similar SPWF, 36, energetic, attractive, athletic, love the outdoors, quick mind, easy smile, confident, playful, warm, independent, wise, looking for fantastic LTR. Box 2 6 6 LONELY & ALONE IN A COUPLES WORLD? DWF, 39, looking for W M , 40s, to explore life. Must be honest, serious & playful, enjoy children, quiet life, dinner, movies, walks 8! sunsets. Box 263

HANDSOME, LOVING, faithful, sensitive, warm, strong, playful, nurturing, aware, tolerant, prayerful, congruent, respectful, kind, dependable, s e n s u o u s warrior seeks feminine counterpart for joyful, lifelong, romantic partnership. Procreation on agenda? Photo please. Box 2 7 4

ECO-RADICAL, FEMINIST W/ FASHION attitude sought for Adirondack Beltane fertility rituals (such as plunging into the eternal wetness). Weekend warriors or faint of heart need not apply, and forget email. S o m e herbal knowledge required. Correspondence first. Box 282

DEPENDABLE 81 FUN. D W P M , 47, handsome, youthful, educated, in-shape, NS, financially secure. Interests: ballroom dancing, travel, books, nature, sports, long walks, romance. I S O loyal, attractive and fit woman, 35-50, for possible LTR. Box 269

S W M , 5'7", TRIM, IN-SHAPE, NICE looking, early 50s, politically conservative & financially secure. Likes sailing, biking, kayaking, dining out & travelling. Seeks a trim, fit, attractive SWF, 30-50 w/ similar interests to sail and enjoy the s e a s o n s together. Box 277

CHEERFUL, ATTRACTIVE P W M S E E K S daytime snuggle-bunny. Add a little fun and spice to your life. Think it over. Take your time. Box 284 S W M , 28, SEEKS...DERMATAZOON, preferably Cimex lectularius. References to Robyn Hitchcock et. al. not necessary, but a plus. Box 285

S W M , 37, 6', ACCOMPLISHED, BOLD, contemplative, dexterous, energetic, fit, generous, h u m o r o u s , imaginative, just, kisser, lion-hearted, manly, nurturing, oenophile, passionate, quick, reliable, sybaritic, talented, unscrambled, virile, witty, xenophile, yang, zingy. I S O articulate, hard-headed w o m a n for g o o d times and possible LTR. Joie de vivre non-negotiable. Box 2 7 1

m GF SEEKING GF, 50S-60S. Love cats, music, drumming. I a m an artist, writer looking for s o m e o n e with similar interests. Written responses to all. W o m e n of color & w/ disabilities encouraged. Box 2 7 0

mm GWM, 36, W A N T S TO PLEASE. Prefer older male. Box 2 7 9

ISO MAN, 30-50, W H O NEEDS occasional help with cooking and cleaning. G W M , 4oish, finds it erotic to take care of masculine guy. No money or sex expected. 2 7 8

4 digit box numbers can be contacted either through voice mail or by letter. 3 digit box numbers can only be contacted by letter. Send letter along w/ $5 to PO Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402 LOVE IN C Y B E R S P A C E . P O I N T Y O U R W E B B R O W S E R TO H T T P : / / W W W . S E V E N D A Y S V T . C O M TO S U B M I T Y O U R M E S S A G E

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