Seven Days, August 26, 1998 by Seven Days

ODD, STRANGE, CURIOUS AND WEIRD BUT TRUE NEWS ITEMS FROM EVERY CORNER OF THE GLOBE Inappropriate Use

an accomplice were arrested for fobbing a convenience store in Raleigh, N orth Carolina, after nroutine check in Colchester, M they raced to their getaway car but found two o f their friends Essex, discovered a m otorist inside with the doors locked wearing rain boots filled with having sex. According to the baked beans in tom ato sauce. prosecutor, Guilbault, who “We have no idea why he was doing it, but it is an offense not to be in proper control o f the car,” a police spokesperson said after the driver was released w ith a warning. W earin g boots full o f baked beans could cause the driver to be distract ed and have an accident.”

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Curses, Foiled Again A lone worker at a Burger Kang restaurant in Portland, C onnecticut, had just put breakfast sandwiches in the microwave ovens when an armed m an entered and dem anded she open the cash drawer. As she fumbled with the lock, the oven timers sounded, scaring the robber, who thought they were security alarms, according to manager Jorge Ruisanchez, who noted, “H e disappeared in two seconds.” • Michael Guilbault, 19, and

H ornes vehicle, finding a plastic baggie in his wallet. Hom e explained it contained his grandmothers ashes, but the officer who field-tested the si contents said they tested posi tive for methamphetamine. H om e was arrested and, because he couldn’t post the' J $7500 bond, spent the n , next 30 days in the Bexar C ounty Jail. T he first half o f that time he had to wear a mask because anoth- j er test mistakenly showed he had tuberculosis. Finally, two laboratory tests proved pleaded guilty, and his accomthat the bag contained human plice were forced to wait until remains, and prosecutors the couple finished before they dropped all charges. Meanwhile, Horne said, “I had could get in the car, by which lost my truck — they repo’d it time their pacing and yelling while I was in jail. The security had attracted the attention o f service firm didn’t want me several witnesses. back because o f the drug charge. And I was kicked out Ashes to Ashes o f my apartm ent.” W hat’s Michael Horne, 21, was driving hom e from his job as a | mom, it took him five m onths security guard in San Antonio, and a court order to get the Texas, early one m orning when city to return his grandmoth er’s ashes. he said he became too tired to ■ drive and pulled into a parking Mental Push-ups lot to take a nap. A police car Thinking about exercising stopped and officers searched

had to be used to remove is almost as beneficial as doing it, according to British '; researcher Dave Smith o f Wrong Arm oj the Law M anchester Metropolitan W hen FBI agents were sent University. A group o f exercis to Albania to teach criminal ers improved their perfor i n v estig atio ft,;t|^ fe n te d an mance 33 percent in one office next to the presidential m onth, whereas the non-exerpalace on the main street o f cisers showed no i m p e l l e n t . d ie c a p itib in July the office The non-exercisers who then practiced doing the exercise in ^ ^ 'b r o k e t i ^ t O j ^ d ^ e c t d their head, however, performed prits made off with $2750 in 16 percent better when it came cash. “Now,” the daily paper Shekulli com m ented, “the to doing the actual exercise. Albanians can p u t these lessons into practice by finding the The Nose Knows T, . • A 10-yek-old Ma$sa| j th ie y ^ P c ^ ^ ':- 'Vi.K: chusetts girl who had her nos Rules Are Rules tril pierced put two magnetic After landing in Milan, earrings through the hole and Italy, British pilot Bryan Bliss, wound up in the hospital. Dr. 57, held 148 passengers aboard Terry Garfinkle, writing in the his plane because no one Alew England Journal o f Medicine, reported that the girl would adm it to breaking the C om plaSpidjfpainftd pressure,* which turned out to be caused for Go airline, one passenger by the magnets, each the size blocked the smoke detector in o f a watch battery, being so one o f the planes toilets and strong that they broke away smoked a cigarette. Bliss asked from the rings. Because they the culprit to come forward, were drawn to each other, they becam eJfobedilea oft botb^W l but when no one did, he held sides o f the nasal septum, out ''-them , for 40 minutes, then let them go. (7) o f reach o f medical instruments, A special pair o f forceps

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MUSIC CONFERENCE MISREP RESENTED I took part in the Burlington Music Conference. I played a solo show at Manhattan Pizza, I attended two seminars, and as a volunteer I was venue coordinator at two other shows. Also, I did postering. I feel Pamela Polston misrepresented the general reception as “a chorus of complaints” [“Rhythm & News, August 5], because a sound-bite like that gives a bad impression. I’m afraid I too was in that “chorus,” because in an enterprise such as this there are many points of stress for all concerned, but I thought of it as “whining.” Ask anyone who knows me — sometimes I whine. But I also had a great time, got paid, saw some great music, and most impor tantly for me, personally met and got business cards from five valuable con tacts, which (hopefully) will further my career. I would like to thank Tom Baggott and his staff for the conference. Tom did an astounding amount of work, as did his staff, and I believe we benefit greatly from his efforts. A lot of great shows were seen, and a lot of seeds were sown for next years conference. Sure, there were things to whine about, but it takes projects like this to put a town on the map. We can make it better next year. Thanks to everyone involved. And for those of you who missed it all — you missed it! — Charlie Messing Burlington

SICK FREAKS UNDESERVING? This letter is written in response to a recent column from “Lola the Love Counselor.” I frankly found the 8/5/98 question and answer regarding “blumpkins” offensive, distasteful and disturbing. I do not think that the deviant sexual practices of a few sick freaks in your reading audience warrant even passing mention in your publication. Despite the fact that I found myself curiously aroused, I am galled at the thought that children could be exposed to this subject matter. I can understand Mr. Freyne’s anarchic rants, your defense of bizarre pornography disguised as “art,” even your attempts to mutate our species further by pairing up aberrant weirdos through your personal ads; how ever, I must draw the line when you venture into the

coprophiliac fetishes of a twisted few. Thank you for addressing this matter. — Vincent Stiglivicz Burlington LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT! I want to thank Seven Days for the personal ads section! Over the past eight months I have put in about seven different personal ads, with not much luck at all until when I put it in on July 16.1 have met someone that I am truly in love with because of your personal ad section! I have never believed in love at first sight, until now. We get along better than I could have ever imagined. For all those nonbelievers out there [who think] personal ads don’t work...they do. I hat! been married for 15 years. I have custody of my children and I did n’t think I would ever meet someone because they would be scared away instantly seeing my three chil dren ages six to 14. Thank you so much, Seven Days, for having Person to Person personal ads. You have made my life and dreams come true. — K Chittenden Burlington ‘SAVING’ CLICHES If you’re taking a poll on Saving Private Ryan, put my vote in Rick Kisonak’s column. Yes, it is amazingly powerful (Weekly Mail, August 12). Hard not to be when big-budget special effects drench the screen in gore, guts and blown-off body parts. And yes, it has “no story, is riddled with genre cliches and no characters” as Kisonak stated (July 29). First there’s the intrinsic implausibility of a group of soldiers (actors?) cavorting around Normandy doing various good works (principally involving killing lots of Germans) without regard to their supposedly important mission. Then when Ryan, found after many adventures, is reluctant to leave his buddies in a tight spot defending the last bridge over something or other, the plan (as best as I could figure it) appears to be to fight to the last man to stop the Germans destroying the bridge and, should it come to the last man, he’s to blow up the bridge to keep it from the Germans. That provides the excuse for another long round of fireworks, blood and guts. And the cliches! Maybe Spielberg was satirizing war movies by using every cliche from every war movie ever made? Hard to believe that he has enough intelligence or sense of humor to do that from way he rubs our noses in gore and schmaltz. His working rule seems to be that anything worth stating is worth over stating. It’s so bad that I’ll bet it gets nominated for at legst eight Oscars. — Justin Joffe Burlington

Id lers Policy: SEVEN DAYS wants your rants and raves, in 250 words

POT SHOT Billy Greer — a drug smuggler to the bitter end? By P e t e r F r e y n e ...................................... ....................p a g e 7

BARELY EDUCATIONAL A student exposes his summer job — a t a strip club By Ma t t he w K r a m e r ..................................................... p a g e

HEAD OF THE CLASS A before-school chat with Jack Crowl By Pamel a P o l s t o n ....................... ..............................p a g e

ON GUARD A former patrol boy recalls his beat on the street By Ron P o w e r s ......................................... >......................p a g e

SCHOOLS OF THOUGHT Why are more Vermonters opting fo r private education? By Ke vi n J . K e l l e y ............. ...................................p a g e 20

COURSES WE'D MOST LIKE TO TAKE ... i f only we had the time By Gl e nn S e v e r a n c e

................................................. p a g e

PITCHER PERFECT Restaurant Review: The Pitcher Inn By M a r i a l i s a C a l t a ................................................. p a g e 31

OUTDOORS: WAKE UP Tired o f water wedgies? Now there’s another way to waterski By F l i p B r o w n .................................................................. p a g e 32

REAL VILLE: CINEMA CITY The Montreal World Film Festival reels them in By J e a n n e K e l l e r ......................................................p a g e 34

departm ents

news q u i r k s ................................................ p a g e 2 w e e k l y ma i 1 .................................................... page 3 exposure .......................................................... page 3 s t r a i g h t d o p e .................................................... page 4 inside track .............................................. page 5 backtalk ............................................................... page 6 sound a d v i c e .................................................... page 8 calendar ................................... . . . . . p a g e 24 art listings .................................................... p a g e 36 talking pictures ........................................ p a g e 38 crossword puzzle .........................................p a g e 38 t r o u b l e t o w n ..........................................................p a g e 38 c l a s s i f i e d s ..........................................................p a g e 40 g r e e t i n g s f r o m dug n ap ....................... p a g e 40 s to ry minute ....................................................p a g e 41 red meat ............................................................... p a g e 42 l i f e in hell .................................................... p a g e 42 wellness d ire c to ry ................................... p a g e 4 3 h e a l t h q&a ..........................................................p a g e 43 real a stro lo g y .............................................. p a g e 44 p e r s o n a l s ............................................................... p a g e 45 ....................... p a g e 45 dykes to watch out f o r l ol a, the love counselor . . . . p a g e 46

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CO-PUBIISHERS/EDITORS Pamela Polston, Paula Routly ARTDIRECTOR Samantha Hunt DESIGNERJoshua Highter PRODUCTIONMANAGER Lucy H ow e CIRCULAIION/CLASSIFBS Glenn

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enging someone on a am.em.nt of fact is making fim of their tem, should, seh<i that one tbBill Clinton. 5 regarding names are mostly handled at the local level, so I hesimeralize. But New York state does not prevent unnamed fiewim leaving the hospital, and Vd be amazed if any jurisdiction did. =hospital is going tp risk an accusation of false urance company?is going to pay for an extra s t •■■■>■■. ..x new mom and pop can’t make up their minds? ss to Jenn, though, hospital staffers often pressure parents to hr kids right away, evidently o n * . rteoty d m an unnamed pet>otentiai m o h ^ in the machinery of state, matter of common law you hate die right to use any name you hout legal proceedings of any kind, provided you* not trying to someone. I dont know that the issue has ever come before a it presumably this means you h a # &© i ^ t& o t to namef5ur " thjU-milwr, there’s nothing to prevent you from using an unpro-

a lot of ( o $ p i t ^ ^ ^ o ^ ^ i ^ ^ ^ f i i g r a ^ ' x i « ^ tliaii not naming your child,-opp|eastgaot exhibiting any urgency m the matter, rs an unnatural act. Many hospitals have a “name lady,” often a volunteer, who comes arourtdl to ask for the newbpm’s name before the family goes home. Typically you can apply for the child ssocialsecurity number at the same time. If you play ball and name names, the service is free. But if, as you’re legally entitled, you want to send the name in later, you may be hit with a

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One hospital spokeswoman told me that when she was born 30 years ago in a Catholic hospital in Connecticut, her mother planned to name

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The Roar From Omagh In the last week, yours truly, by virtue o f profession and gift o f gab, has been queried repeatedly for an opinion on the recent devel opments in Fornigate. T hat’s the preeminent probe o f the presidential prick that media megalith Time W arner (with assistance from General Electric, owner o f NBC, C N B C and, in partnership with Bill Gates, M SNBC), has turned into the most im portant news story on the planet. N othing sells like sex. T he ratings prove it. Those Bill C linton/M onica Lewinsky queries were curtly brushed off. “N ot really paying attention,” said I about the madness in the eye o f the national media storm. Rather, my attention has been focused elsewhere. You see, I’m Irish. We cry. Often. It’s in the genes. And the spigots o f tears were turned on once again when the 500-pound fertilizer bomb det onated on the main street o f the market town o f Omagh, C ounty Tyrone, on August 15. Twenty-eight people — mostly women and children — and twins, eight m onths in the womb, were blown apart like watermelons that leisurely Saturday afternoon in the great est human sacrifice o f Ireland’s “Troubles.” Hundreds more were wounded, lost arms and legs, fingers and eyes — their lives forever changed by the dem ented deed o f the latest little IRA splinter group that cannot accept the negotiated peace settlement. All this coming in the wake o f May’s national referen dum, in which the Irish people voted for the peace agreement ironed out under the guidance o f former Sen. George M itchell o f Maine. Oh, bloody Ireland, all in a roar, the fascists offreedom again a t the h a lf door! Our hearts in our throats our feet on a distant shore. The Om agh bom bing and its aftermath got a quick m ention on the network news, but way down in the broadcasts, after the titillating sto ries o f the devil with the stained blue dress and the stirring debate over whether oral sex deserves inclusion in the definition o f “sexual relations.” While The Christian Science M onitor esti mated 20-40,000 practicing M orm on polyga mists in his home state o f Utah, Sen. O rrin H atch was elevated by the T V gods to the role o f C hief o f the Congressional Sex Police. And C N N ’s Larry King (on his seventh, or is it eighth, marriage?) was reincarnated on C N N ’s worldwide broadcasts as the juridical face o f American morality. For crying out loud! For the last six years, Bill C linton’s dick has been the num ber-one topic on “Crossfire,” from G ennifer Flowers to Paula Jones, and now on to M onica Lewinsky. No wonder when we launch a missile strike on terrorist bases and a chemical weapons plant overseas, most Americans don’t have a clue as to what continents the targets are located on. Oh, bloody Ireland, all in a roar, Omagh in August, ju st like before. When peace was a dove, when freedom meant holy war. T he glaciers in Alaska are melting. T he frogs are dying. Disease, poverty and oppression are having a field day around the globe. At home our elections are contam inated by the money o f the global corporate elite, whose loyalty is not encumbered by national boundaries. Success in America is now defined by ownership o f a gasguzzling, waste-spewing “sport utility vehicle,” the civilian equivalent o f an “armored personnel carrier.” And all the billionaires o f broadcasting want us to hear again and again — half-hour by

august

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half-hour, thanks to C N N — is the latest poop not on elections, but rather on erections o f the presidential staff. Hey, Tom Paine, how we doing? Oh, bloody Ireland all in a roar, where funerals inspire, where saints are no more. Where tears fa ll like rain and rain falls like war. But hey, First Amendment! Freedom o f the press — a sacred bedrock o f our American democracy. Having a “free” press, however, doesn’t mean it is free of charge. And we are paying dearly these days. Time Warner owns the television and radio networks that promote Fornigate, and Time Warner publishes the magazines and best sellers that echo their TV coverage. In the land o f Beanie Babies, can Monica dolls be far off? And the beret? Monica berets will surely be all the fash ion this fall. Oh, bloody Ireland, all in a roar! Link arms, march quickly against the drumbeat o f war. Peace is our right. Omagh is the door. And march they did last Saturday. Sixty-thousand Catholics and Protestants claim ing that precious right. The right to live in peace. No American president has done anywhere near as much as Big Bill to facilitate the dawning of peace and justice in the Emerald Isle. But statesmanship counts for little anymore. W ithout O.J. and Princess Di and now “B.J.” and the W hite House sex scandal, what would the corporate media have covered in the 1990s? I mean, there are only so many hurricanes out there, and besides, they’re seasonal. Update o f the Greer Update — Vermont’s leg endary drug smuggler, Billy Greer, was a little upset with last week’s Inside Track report that sources say Billy the Kid is turning into Billy the Rat. (Good to know Billy’s got access to Seven Days and W IZN down at the jail.) “I was quite upset and very disappointed,” wrote Greer. “As o f this day I have no deal with the government. Accusing a person of being a ‘rat’ with no proof other than the local rumors is very poor journalism .. .Maybe a call to Mike Barnicle o f the Boston Globe could teach you responsible reporting,” he wrote. Those sentiments were echoed by Greer’s champion, Dr. Bob Melamede, molecular immunologist, UVM faculty member and U.S. Senate candidate on the Grassroots Party ticket. W ith Greer’s sentencing date rapidly approach ing, Melamede cautioned, yours truly could “endanger negotiations” between Billy and the government “by writing about it.” Dr. Bob sug gests that “hypothetically” there are ways one can cooperate with the government and not earn the title “rat.” One “hypothetical” scenario he suggested involved a person in circumstances similar to Mr. Greer’s who gets others “to coop erate because they’re honorable and decent peo ple.” Stay tuned. For more on just what Greer and the boys were up to during their 1997 trial check out “Pot Shot” on page 7. Amazing! T he Tutde Factor — Two weeks to primary day, when we’ll finally know just how much “pull” retired Tunbridge dairy farmer Fred T utde has left. Fred’s facing off with Jack M cCarpetbagger, er, M cM ullen in the G O P U.S. Senate primary. But our sources say Democrat Deb Markowitz frets that so many liberal Ds will cross over to vote for Fred on the Republican ticket, not enough will be left to check off her name in the secretary of state primary where she faces Eugene Stratton. Relax, Deb. ®

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laid to rest forever its Domestic Resurrection Circus after an audience member was killed. Then the lights went out for a week at Unadilla Theater in Marshfield. T he future o f the funky, down-to-earth sum m er series is up in the air following the dis covery o f a num ber o f code violations that could end up being too extensive, or expensive, to fix. Assistant State Fire Marshal Wayne D unlap was up for a performance o f H .M .S. Pinafore when he noticed a num ber o f improperly wired fixtures in the 80-seat theater. H e loved the show, according to Unadilla direc tor Bill Blachly, b u t was less enthused about the exposed electri cal conductors. D unlap returned a few days later for a more extensive examination and announced the place was “a mess.” His follow-up report gave Blachly three days to correct all “life-

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short list o f Oscar-worthy films, along with The Butcher Boy and The Truman Show. In a glowing blurb, the writer described director Jay Craven as “the best-kept secret in American filmmaking.” But David M am et found him easily enough — on location in Cabot, where Craven was working on a pint-sized picture with a crew o f kids. T he movie-making author rode his bike past the set and said he couldn’t stop, Craven says o f the M amet sighting, “because it was part of his exercise routine. Then he said, ‘W hy are you shooting a movie in my town? I don’t go to Barnet to write plays” . . . Too m any Tiffanys? Now that news anchor Tiffany Eddy has said “ta-ta” to Channel 22, the other “Tiffany” on staff there has emancipated herself by dropping her androgynous pseudonym. In a very short latenight newscast Monday, Taylor Burns used her real first name — Tiffany — for the first time. “I just felt like it was time to go back to my real nam e,” Burns reports the m orning after. T he station had forced her to pick an alternate moniker, saying hav

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. . . Reap is only peripherally about pot. Set in northern Vermont, the first novel from Eric Rickstad concerns a modern marijuana outlaw not unlike our own Billy Greer. Rickstad was still painting houses for Paul Lafayette in Burlington when he learned his manuscript had sold to Viking, which prom ptly bought the idea for his next book and forwarded him a respectable advance. “I didn’t expect to hear back for m onths,” Rickstad says. Reap is the only “first novel” on the Viking list for next fall. Harvest time . . . It’s a tall casting order, even for a Hollywood studio. T he producers o f Cider House Rules are look ing in Vermont for six- and seven-year-old boys to play orphans in the film adaptation of the novel by John Irving. The director is Lasse Hallstrom, whose credits include My Life as a Dog, W hat’s Eating Gilbert Grape and Something to talk About. I he kid call is Saturday at the Ramada Inn and Conference Center in South Burlington. Now that’s trailer envy. ® august

26 ,

1998

P eter

Frevne

//n

(

razen” may not be a 1 ^ strong enough word to describe the latest revela tions in the case o f convicted international drug smuggler Billy Greer, aka “Billy the Kid.” As David Kirby, the lead gov ernm ent prosecutor on the case put it, “the affidavit speaks for itself.” And the affidavit — written by Special Agent Rick Carter o f the DEA — reads like a paperback thriller. During March, April and May 1997 Greer sat attentively at the defense table in federal court by day. But by night, he was allegedly smuggling m ari juana and cocaine on foot across a remote stretch o f the Vermont-Quebec border, and turning a six-figure profit per run. Greer is a hometown boy from South Burlington who once kicked field goals and scored touchdowns on the Rice High School gridiron — just up the hill from his current res idence at the correctional facili ty on Farrell Street. Those who’ve known Greer over the years describe him as a real charmer, outgoing and gener ous. And many, many people knew Billy Greer. He wheeled and dealed in the big-time o f the drug underworld. Tales from his smuggling ventures became part o f the local crimi nal folklore. But on May 31, 1997, Greer’s world came crashing down, when a federal court jury returned guilty verdicts against him and four co-defendants on federal drug conspiracy charges. It was the biggest drug smug gling case in Vermont history, and the government now says Greer’s smuggling continued even during the course o f the 11-week trial. According to C arter’s affi davit, Greer, along with co defendants Stephen H utchins and Greg Stevens, “continued to be involved in the smuggling o f drugs” from the time they were released on bail in the fall o f 1995 until the night their case went to the jury in May 1997.

august

2 6 V ' 1998

T he trio, along with Tom Cook, was convicted o f con spiracy to im port and export m arijuana and hashish, and o f violating the U.S. Maritime D rug Act. A fifth defendant, Glenn Koski, was convicted

dealings with the GreerHutchins organization. Greg Stevens turned govern ment informant in February 1998. According to his attor ney, Mark Keller, he was look ing at a sentence o f 15-19 years

“Billy asked these people to stand with him forever, but now Billy is trying to make his own deal with the government. At some point it gets to be every man for himself." -Mark Keller, lawyer only on the latter charge. They under federal sentencing guide are to be sentenced on lines. Keller said there is no for September 27, though Greer’s mal “deal” with the govern lawyer, Robert Kalina, has ment. However, Stevens’ coop requested a postponement, eration is expected to reduce his since that date is a Jewish holi sentence. day. Greer and the others will Billy Greer and Stephen call Stevens a “rat,” acknowl H utchins were the undisputed edged Keller. “Billy asked these ringleaders o f a multi-millionpeople to stand with him forev dollar Vermont-based drug er, but now Billy is trying to smuggling enterprise that make his own deal with the thrived for 20 years. At trial, government. At some point it the defendants did not deny gets to be every man for him their criminal past. Rather, they self,” he said. “H onor among argued the statute o f limitations thieves? N ot really.” had expired. They also argued Since local press reports last that they had already served week that he had rolled over, time in Canada for their said Keller, Stevens “has not involvement in a huge interna received any threats.” tional hashish smuggling opera Stevens told the government tion and should not be pun o f two incidents after arraign ished again for the same crime. ment and prior to trial in which Testimony at trial revealed he allegedly assisted Greer in that from 1989-91 they had unloading “300-400 pounds” of off-loaded three hashish ship marijuana from tractor-trailers m ents totaling 110 tons near in the Burlington area. And he the m outh o f the St. Lawrence provided information on River. Witnesses testified Greer numerous cross-border drug was aboard one o f the vessels smuggling trips that occurred that crossed the Atlantic from prior to and during their crimi the Netherlands. Those ship nal trial. ments were part o f the Octopus Stevens, a former wellsyndicate run by D utch crime known Burlington bartender, boss Johann Verhoek, who is also wore a hidden microphone currently serving time in the and transmitter on several occaNetherlands. The D utch press ~ sions to gather information has reported that the U.S. has from others involved in the indicted Verhoek and plans on enterprise. Last week Larry bringing him to Vermont for Lindelof o f Hinesburg and trial on charges related to his Jonathan D iam ond o f South

S E V E N ’* M Y S

Burlington were arrested as a result of Stevens’ cooperation with the government. They’ve been charged with conspiracy to im port marijuana. Stevens also told Agent Carter that he had been involved in “about 10” smug gling operations o f marijuana and cocaine at the Vermont/ Quebec border in East Richford. According to the affi davit, “Stevens learned that Greer had an associate in Quebec who was connected to a large indoor hydroponic mari juana growing operation. Stevens learned from Greer that the Canadian organization manufactured 100 pounds o f high-grade marijuana each week, year round...G reer claimed that the subject was connected to the Hell’s Angels and to a major marijuana m an ufacturer in Canada.” In addition, Stevens told Carter o f one run in January 1997, in which he and Hutchins “used snowmobiles to cross the frozen Missisquoi Bay area o f Lake Cham plain and met with Michael Maple on the Canadian side.” Maple allegedly gave them a package containing an undisclosed am ount o f cash and two duffel bags filled with pot. W hen the pair returned to Vermont they were met by Billy the Kid. Maple, a longtime associate o f Greer’s, had fled to Canada to avoid prosecution. He was subsequently arrested and extradited to the U.S. and is scheduled for trial next m onth. Sources tell Seven Days, however, that Maple has cut a deal with the government and will not go to trial. According to Agent Carter, Stevens told him how he recruited Michael Derouchie, an East Richford resident with land on the border. Next, they found a nearby location w ith a route suitable for walking into Quebec. “Greg Stevens and

William Greer tested the bor der-crossing location on four or five occasions to determine the crossing time and distances involved,” writes Carter. The pair was able to carry up to 60 pounds o f pot per trip. “Greer was obtaining the marijuana for $1800 to $2800 per pound,” said Stevens, “and selling it for $4500 per pound” to customers in the New York City area. T h at adds up to an extreme ly lucrative business: O n a 50pound shipment, Greer would reap a profit o f about $100,000. Lindelof and D iam ond were small fry in the operation. Lindelof allegedly rented vehi cles from T hrifty Car Rental, then drove Greer and Stevens into Quebec, picked up the pot and dropped them near the Vermont border. There they’d walk across, meet up with Lindelof on the Vermont side and drive back to Burlington. D iam ond allegedly partici pated with Stevens in two walk ing trips across the Canadian border in May 1997, just as the trial was winding down. Stevens wore a wire earlier this year when he met separate ly with Lindelof and Derouchie, He also wore a wire, according to the affidavit, in M arch o f this year, when he m et with a person identified only as being “close to William Greer.” In that meeting the per son told Stevens that Greer said it’s okay “to discuss the past things that were brought up in the trial,” but warned him not to say a word about what went on during the trial. “Steve’s standing by it, Billy’s standing by it and you’re standing by it,” the unidentified person told Stevens. “Deny it all the way,” was the message Greer sent to his former partner in crime — a message now pre served on tape by the United States government. ®

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rhythm & news BEAN COUNTERS? The band with the homey moniker of Black Bean Soup has some pretty impressive ingredients. Members Robbie Tischler, Samson Ramos, Charlie Valenti, Mel Morley, Kenny Suarez and Paris Dennis may not be house hold names themselves, but the bands they hail from are, at least in my household: UB40, The Rolling Stones, KC & the Sunshine Band, Yellowman. The semi-supergroup’s debut CD, R ub a D u b Love, birthed at #32 in B illboard, and is dominated, not surprisingly, by a pop-reggae feel. Next February the Soup is scheduled for a world tour in front of UB40, but you can catch them while they’re still perfecting the recipe — this Thursday at Stowe’s Rusty Nail.

THAT RIBBON OF HIGHWAY In true ’60s fashion, the

A u g u sjtt 2 9 t h ^

L A S T

over

K ID

every W ED N E SD A Y : F R E E POOL alI ni ght

musicians on the Vermont trek for Nuclear Abolition on their 93-mile walk through the state these past couple of weeks are raising hell — and their voices — with new songs written for the occa

WEDNESDAY

country, alt-rock), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. $3. BOSSA NOVA NIGHT (members of Orange Factory &c Belizbeha), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. MISSING JOE, CURRENTLY NAMELESS (groove rock), Club Toast, 9:30p.m. NC/$5. OPEN MIKE W/PICKLES, Manhattan Pizza, 10 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE W/DAVE NERBAK, Vermont Pub & Brewery, 10 p.m. NC. GRANOLA FUNK EXPRESS (performance/hip-hop/rock), Higher Ground, Winooski, 9 p.m. $3. KARAOKE NIGHT, Extreme Sports Bar & Dance Club, Malletts Bay, 9 p.m. NC. COMEDY NIGHT, Edgewater Pub, Colchester, 9 p.m. NC. MARK BRISSON & FRIENDS (acoustic), Cheers lounge; WESTERN WEDNESDAY (line dancing), Cheers disco, both 9 p.m. NC. CHARLIE 0'S HOUSE BAND (improv), Charlie Os, Montpelier, 10 p.m. NC.

u n kn o w in g /W h ile o u r la n d is ra p ed by com panies.

Hmmm...doesn’t have quite the same ring, but the spirit is there. Write on.

SINGLE TRACKS Congratulations to Zola Turn for their opening slot on the Suffragette Tour in Portland, Maine, last Wednesday — too bad they weren’t included on home turf version the next night . . . Kudos, too, to our friend in Vermont’s smallest city — owner of The Rude Dog Tavern, Rob Grassano, is celebrating the club’s first anniver sary this Friday, while Johnny Devil Band rocks the house . . . (7)

B A N D N A M E OF THE W E E K :

JAMES 0 BAND (rock), Breakwater Cafe, 4:30 p.m. NC. JENHI JOHNSON (jazz/blues), Sai-Gon Cafe, 8 p.m. NC. MICHELE LALIBERTE (French & German cabaret), Leunig’s, 8:30 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE (acoustic), Dubie’s Cafe, 8 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, 135 Pearl, 9:30 p.m. NC. RODNEY & SHAUN (acoustic), Sweetwaters, 8 p.m. NC. DISCO FUNK (DJ), Ruben James, 11 p.m. NC. CHAD (pop-rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. CONSTRUCTION JOE, INVISIBLE JET (alt-

: page

m orning, by th e river flo w in g /W e p a ssed a nuke p la n t as i t w as g lo w in g /A n d a ll ou r neighbors liv e d there

Got something to tell Rhythm & News? Call Pamela at (802) 864.5684. O r mail your tip to P.O. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402, or e-mail to sevenday@together.net.

e v e ry T H U R S D A Y : T N T D J & K a ra o k e 8 BALL T O U R N A M E N T a? 7 :3 0 Exit 10,1-89,1 So. Main Street* Waterbury, VT (802) 244-5223 • Open Dally 5-close

sion. Vermont folkie/activist Rik Palieri reports from the road his song, “We Don’t Care Where You Dump It,” was inspired by Vermont’s plan to send its nuclear waste to Sierra Blanca, Texas. Meanwhile, a group from that town — including singer-songwriter/cartoonist Gary Oliver — is marching alongside the Vermonters. Palieri and Oliver, along with fellow singer-songwriter Laura Simon, took some liberties with Woody Guthrie’s classic, “This Land is Your Land”: One Sunday

^ S t V f n DAYS

eel Salvador THURSDAY

PARROT-HEAD PARTY, Breakwater Cafe, 4:30 p.m. NC. ELLEN POWELL DUO & LITTLE JOYCE (jazz standards) Leunig’s, 8:30 p.m. NC. BARBACOA (guitar noir), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. GOOD QUESTION (rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. LOCOMOTION (DJ Little Martin/ ’70s disco), 135 Pearl, 10 p.m. NC. SKOIDATS, THE ALLSTONIANS, PERFECT THYROID (ska), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $4. THE ERRATICS (ska/rock), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. $3. OPEN MIKE W/D. DAVIS, Cactus Cafe, 9 p.m. NC. JALAPENO BROS, (acoustic rock), Vermont Pub & Brewery, 10 p.m. NC. LEAVITT JAM (rock), Trackside Tavern, Winooski, 9 p.m. NC.

JUMPING UGLY, DEAD HIPPY (rock), Higher Ground, Winooski, 9 p.m. $5. KARAOKE, Edgewater Pub, Colchester, 9 p.m. NC. MICHAEL P & GUESTS (acoustic), BU’s Emporium, Colchester, 6 p.m. NC. MARK BRISSON & FRIENDS (acoustic), Cheers lounge, 9 p.m. NC. GUY COLASACCO (singer-song writer), Jake’s, 6:30 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Swany’s, Vergennes, 9 p.m. NC. TNT (DJ & karaoke), Thirsty Turtle, Waterbury, 9 p.m. NC. BLACK BEAN SOUP (members of UB40, KC & the Sunshin'e Band, Rolling Stones), Rusty Nail, Stowe, 8 p.m. $10/12. MARKLEGRAND (Americana), Thrush Tavern, Montpelier, 7:30 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Gallagher’s,

august

26,

1998

3rd Annual Garden

Waitsfield, 8:30 p.m. NC. VIPERHOUSE (acid jazz), Mad Mountain Tavern, Waitsfield, 9 p.m. $5. ELIS ABETH VON TRAPP (singer-songwriter), Giorgios Cafe, Tucker Hill Lodge, Waitsfield, 6:30 & 8:30 p.m. $6.

FRIDAY

ABAIR BROS, (rock), Breakwater Cafe, 4 p.m. NC. CLYDE STATS (jazz), Windjammer, 5 p.m. NC. JOE CAPPS QUARTET (jazz), Sai-Gon Cafe, 7 p.m. NC. FACE RAKE, SMASHED RAPTURE, MAHUNKIND (hardcore), 242 Main, 8 p.m. $4. RHYTHM ROCKETS (r&b), Halvorsons, 10 p.m. $5. PERRY NUNN (acoustic), Ruben James, 5 p.m. NC, followed by DJ NIGHT, 9 p.m. NC. ORANGE FACTORY (acid-soul/funk), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. EVOLUTION (DJ Craig Mitchell), 133 Pearl, 10 p.m. $4/3. DANCE PARTY (hip-hop), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $5. JOHN BROWN'S BODY (reggae), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. $4. SENSI BLE SHOES (rock/r&b), Nectars, 9:30 p.m. NC. THE BIG BOYS (jazz), Vermont Pub & Brewery, 10 p.m. NC. COMEDY ZONE (stand-up), Radisson Hotel, 8 & 10 p.m. $7. ABAIR BROS, (rock), Franny Os, 9:30 p.m. NC. DJ BUTCH, Cheers, 9 p.m. NC. EMPTY POCK ETS (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC. WALT ELMORE & ALL THAT JAZZ, W/SP1EGLE WILLCOX, Tuckaways, Sheraton Hotel, 9 p.m. NC. RAY VASSO (acoustic), Ground Round„8 p.m. NC. MR. FRENCH (blues-rock), Trackside Tavern, Winooski, 9 p.m. $2. LIFTED (house DJs), Higher Ground, Winooski, 9 p.m. $6 before 10 p.m./$7/8 after. DJ NIGHT (Dr. E), Clover House Pub, Colchester, 9 p.m. NC. BLUE VOODOO (rock), Edgewater Pub, Colchester, 9 p.m. NC. JOHN CASSEl (jazz piano), The Tavern, Inn at Essex, 8 p.m. NC. DANCIN'DEAN (country dance & instruction), Cobbweb, Milton, 7:30 p.m. $5. LIVE JAZZ, Diamond Jim’s Grille, St. Albans, 7:30 p.m. NC. MICHELE LALIBERTE (German & French cabaret), Chow! Bella, St. Albans, 9 p.m. NC. SMOKIN' GRASS, HIGH FLYING GARGOYLES (jamgrass, groove), Lower Pond, Johnson State College, 7 p.m. NC. BLUES FOR BREAKFAST, Thirsty Turtle, Waterbury, 9:30 p.m. NC. DJ NIGHT, Gallagher’s, Waitsfield, 7:30 p.m. $3/5. PURE PRESSURE (r&b/soul), Mad Mountain Tavern, Waitsfield, 9

of Eden Festival with

p.m. $4. DAN & BETSY JESSIE (jazz cabaret), Villa Tragara, Waterbury Center, 6 & 8:30 p.m. $7.50. LIVE MUSIC, Rusty Nail, Stowe, 8:30 p.m. $5. SHANE & CHARLOTTE BRODIE (folk), Three Mountain Lodge, Jeffersonville, 6 p.m. NC. VIBROKINGS (rock), Charlie O ’s, Montpelier, 9 p.m. NC. JENN1 JOHNSON (jazz/blues), J. Morgan’s, Montpelier, 7 p.m. NC. DAN BRUCE JAZZ-TET, Cafe Old, North Common Chelsea, 8 p.m. NC. JOHNNY DEVIL BAND (rock; anniversary party), Rude Dog Tavern, Vergennes, 9 p.m. NC. TANTRUM (rock), Swany’s, Vergennes, 9 p.m. NC.

SATURDAY

THE NATURALS (rock), Breakwater Cafe, 4:30 p.m. NC. ROB TOOF'S HIP-HOP SHOW, 242 Main, 8 p.m. $4. SENSIBLE SHOES (rock/r&b), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. FACTORIA (DJ Little Martin), 135 Pearl, 10 p.m. $4/5. DJ NIGHT, Ruben James, 9 p.m. NC. JAMES HAR VEY BAND (jazz), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. DYSFUNKSHUN, BEAT DOWN, J-BASE (h ip -h o p /fim k /ro c k ), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $3/5. FRANCIS DUNNERY (rock), Club Metronome, 7 p.m. $6/8, followed by RETRONOME (DJ), 10 p.m. NC. BRIAN MICHAEL TURBIDE (acoustic jam), Manhattan Pizza, 10 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. HIP-HOP DJ NIGHT, Ruben James, 11 p.m. NC. THE WARRENS (rock) Vermont Pub & Brewery, 10 p.m. NC. COMEDY ZONE (stand-up), Radisson Hotel, 8 & 10 p.m. $7. KARAOKE, Franny O ’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. DJ BUTCH, Cheers, 9 p.m. NC. GUY COLASACCO (singer-songwriter), Jake’s, 6:30 p.m. NC. EMPTY POCKETS (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC. JOE CAPPS (jazz guitar), Tuckaways, Sheraton Hotel, 9 p.m. NC. ADAM ROSENBERG (acoustic), Ground Round, 8 p.m. NC. FOXTROT ZULU, ARTHUR DENT FOUNDATION (horn/groove rock), Higher Ground, Winooski, 9 p.m. $4/6. MR. FRENCH (blues-rock), Trackside Tavern, Winooski, 9 p.m. $2. MARK LAMPHIER BAND (rock), Edgewater Pub, Colchester, 9 p.m. NC. DJ DANCE PARTY, Extreme Sports Bar & Dance Club, Malletts Bay, 9 p.m. NC. BACK ROADS (countryrock; round & square dancing), Cobbweb, Milton, 8:30 p.m. $7/12. JOHNNY DEVIL BAND (rock), Rude Dog Tavern, Vergennes, 9 p.m. NC. TANTRUM

Club listings continued on page 12

September 5&6

Four long sets of music over two dayswith free camping, goodfood, and qualityvending. Gates open at noon on September 5. "Strange Folk" plays one set Saturday nigth, Strangefolktakes the stagefor 3 sets on Sunday. Special addedentertainment featured as well.

Addison County Field Days Tickets $20, available through Flynn Regional Box Office, Pure New Haven, V T Pop Records, Peacock Music, SoundSource, MusicShop(St. j) Charge by Phone 86-FLYNN

For more info call Strangefolk office: (802) 658-6453 or visit www.strangefolk.com Please: Noalcohol, pets, glass containers, fireworks or weapons Presented by Little Sadie Productions and All Points Booking

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bizarre, lyrics of front man Gordon Downie. Case in point: “Porn speaks to its splintered legions to the pink amid the withered corn stalks in them wintered regions.” Amid the obscure lyrics of “Poets” — and typical of T-Hip songs — comes a quick line clipped from Vermont headlines: “Lawns cut by bare-breasted women.” Yeah, it happened here. “Something On” continues with the same energy, and takes its name from the reintroduction of electricity to Central and Eastern Canada following this January’s ice storm. “Outside there is hectic action, the ice is covering the trees.” While lyrically the more accessible, the song is grittier instrumentally. The middle of th< disc take a drastic turn for the mellow, beginning with the lengthy “Bobcaygeon.” This track features producer and Los Lobos member Steve Berlin on keyboards. Wilco’s Bob Egan also lends a hand on pedal steel on this track and later on “The Rules.” Berlin and Egan began their collaboration with The Tragically Hip during last years Anoth^Rpadside Attraction Tour. The next notable track is “Fireworks,” a straightforward pop-rocker The Hip has performed live under the title “Bobby Orr,” The lyrically playful song describes a relationship between a Canadian boy and a girl from the U.S.: “You said you never gave a fuck about hockey/I never saw someone say that before.” “Escape is at Hand for the Traveilin' Man” may well be the best song here. The atmospheric guitar by Rob Baker sounds foreground. Lyrically, though, Downie s at his best in “Escape,” describes musicians connecting on the road together, then going their separate ways. Phantom /W er lacks the high-energy rock feel of past Hip discs, but it represents a time in their career and dif ferent interpretations of the studio space. The Tragically Hip are still at their best onstage. Catch them this Saturday at the Sugarbush K evin M u rrih y

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READ SEVEN DAYS. continued from page 10

A TTEN TIO N G U IT A R IS T S ! INTRODUCING THE P R A X A X A

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same, but the Nevilles rely on the universal language react to modern sources of moral decay, such as die young urban bros, “You’re Gonna Make Your Mama strike you, lif you’re cynical, as heavy-handed sermon with reggae, the beat is so good you can pretty mucl preachin’ if you must. Or you can cut right to the te

MONDAY

Bud Pint Special • $2.00 All-Day

TUESDAY in the Lounge • Jalapeno Brothers from 8 pm

WEDNESDAY in the Disco • Western Wednesday • Line Dancing Hosted by “Hot Country Legs” • Audrey Belanger $3 (over Applies In the Lounge Hare Brisson A Paul Levitt

be killer live. The 11-song disc includes the ever-pof their show repertoire — “Fire on the Mountain” feai appearance by Bob Weir. Otherwise most of this fan

THURSDAY Ladies Night 95c specials Bud Light Drafts, Schnapps Shooters. Pizza Slices In the Lounge Marc Brisson and Paul Levitt - No (over

Relations has a literal meaning: the whole dang famil form on it, from Aarons son Jason rapping on “You Make ” to Cyril’s wife Gaynielle co-writing three * ing back-up vocjdsfas do his young children Qmari Charles’ wife Kristin contributes clarinet. The CDs the key phrase in “Sacred Ground,” a quintessential bubbles up from some primordial, sensual, very dam swoons with we-are-all-oneness. Produced by James brothers, vl// / Highly recom) Sundai

FRIDAY In the Disco -D J Butch from Montreal A Boston

SATURDAY UPCONING

Kitchen open 12 noon to 9 pm daily Lunches 2 for 1 Monday to Friday from 12 to 1 pm, complete menu of Burgers, Sandwiches, Steaks A Pastas Bill Edw ird's (heers! The Biggest Pub in Town w Largest Dance Floor and State of the Art Sound ^ 520

26,

1998

EVENTS

August 29 - End of Summer Party with DJ Butch A (ralg Mitchell

august

In the Disco -D J Butch from Montreal A Boston

Cabaret Llcease eatraate restricted to 21 aad ever.

S h elb u rn e R o ad . South B urlin g to n • 8 0 2 1 8 6 0

SEVEN DAYS

page

End of Summer Extravaganzas

sound advice

on the/r ‘4 / ^ , , can &af U s- r0i/r

^ Keco

.ro fe a n

So>.

Continued, from page 9 (rock), Swany’s, Vergennes, 9 NC. LASTKIDPICKED (rock), Thirsty Turtle, Waterbury, 9 p.m. $3. MARK LEGRAND&THELOVESICKBAND (country-rock), Charlie Os, Montpelier, 9 p.m. NC. CON STRUCTIONJOE (alt-country), Mad Mountain Tavern, Waitsfield, 9 p.m. $4. IGUANA BOMB (rock), Gallagher’s, Waitsfield, 9 p.m. $3/5. TRAGI CALLYHIP, HAYDEN(rock), Mount Ellen, Sugarbush Resort, Warren, 6 p.m. $24.50. LIVE MUSIC, Rusty Nail, Stowe, 8:30 p.m. $5. SHANE&CHAR LOTTEBRODIE (folk), Boony’s, Franklin, 7 p.m. NC. p .m .

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SUNDAY

EILENPOWELl DUO(jazz), Windjammer, 10 a.m. NC. DOUBLEGAMMON (singer-songwriter duo), Borders, 3 p.m. NC. THEDETONATORS (blues/r&b), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. LOBSTERZFROMMAR2 (Deadlike), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. $3. KARAOKE, Edgewater Pub, Colchester, 9 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE (acoustic), Rozzi’s Lakeshore Tavern, Colchester, 7 p.m. NC. MARK LEGRAND&SARAHMUNRO (acoustic), La Brioche, Montpelier, 11 a.m. NC. LIVE MUSIC (acoustic), Main Street Bar & Grill, Montpelier, 11 a.m. NC. BLUESFESTIVALW/B.B. KING, NEVILLEBROS., DR. JOHN, STO RYVILLE, SETHYACOVONE, Mount Ellen, Sugarbush Resort, Warren, 1 p.m. $32.50.

MONDAY

COEDSIEEl BREEZE(blues). Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. H20, DAYINTHELIFE, SCOUNDRELS (hard core), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $7. SURPRISE, Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. METROLOUNGE (DJ), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. NC. COSMICLOUNGE (house, break-beat DJs), Higher Ground, Winooski, 9 p.m. NC/$2.

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TU ESD A Y

OPENMIKE(acoustic), Burlington Coffeehouse at Rhombus, 8 p.m. $3-6. PAUL ASBELL&CLYDESTATSW/CELIAASBELL (jazz), Leunig’s, 8:30 p.m. NC. DJ NIGHT, Ruben James, 9 p.m. NC. MARTIN&MITCHELL (house DJs), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. NC. MON STERTRUCK(orig. wacko music), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. FLEXTONEHIFI (dancehall DJ), Manhattan Pizza, 10 p.m. NC. HARDLUCK(rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. BASHMENT (reggae DJ), Ruben James, 11 p.m. NC. FLASHBACK (’70s-’90s DJ), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. NC/$5. RUSS&CO. (rock), J.P. s Pub, 9:30 p.m. NC. JALAPENOBROS, (rock), Cheers, 8 p.m. NC. H-MOB (ska/salsa/African jazz), Higher Ground, Winooski, 9 p.m. $3. MIKEDEVER&LAUSANNE ALLEN (folk), Three Mountain Lodge, Jeffersonville, 6 p.m. NC.

Sale prices g o o d thru 9/7/98

page

SEVEN DAYS

august

26,

1998

-------------------------------------------

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A student exposes his summer jo b strip club.” Suddenly, the casual exchange will cease to be a tool um m er’s nearly over, and for the other person to pretend those o f us heading back to they actually care what I did all institutions o f so-called summer. They w ill care. higher learning m ust be pre Suddenly, the small talk will pared for the perennial Small become a conversation. “Wow, talk question: “W hat did you what was that like?” do over the summer?” And I will reply, truthfully, I’ve had my share o f pretty “It was a learning experience.” I typical jobs — an ice cream saw a part o f the world I never stand here, a retail store there. expected to see, and I discov But this summer, not only did I ered things about myself and further my education in an people in general that I never unconventional manner, I now expected to discover. have a reply guaranteed to stop Just so I don’t have to keep anyone in their tracks: repeating myself — and for “I worked as a deejay at a those o f you who want to “borBy

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august

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1998

a t a strip club row” my story if your summer at the hardware store was a shade too dull — I give you this true and unauthorized account o f what it’s like to be a deejay at a strip club in the middle o f Vermont.

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SEVEN DAYS

the illusion created by the club — the illusion o f uncontained C o n tin u ed fro m page 14 female sexuality. T h at’s unfortu nate for them and fortunate for say seems to change their opin the women. I knew the dancers ions; maybe its a Vermont and saw their performance for thing. what it was: a job. For the record, most o f the After a few weeks, I quickly ladies ranged from merely categorized the clientele into attractive to drop-dead gor three groups. T he regulars were geous. T h in k about it: In this the first and most depressing. age o f hyper-self-consciousness, These were the guys who would a woman with any serious come in one to three nights a reservations about her appear week to see their favorite ance would not take a job dancer. We had pet names for which required her to strip them: “The Quiver M an.” down to a G-string several “T he Cokehead.” “The Good times a night. Also, any woman Little C ook.” who’s been in the business for A regular would basically more than a few m onths has plunk down a wad o f money been getting more aerobic exer— at least $50 a night — to be teased by a woman more beau tiful than he would ever have. And, when she was done with him, she would move to the next table and give his neighbor the same treatment. T hat’s gotta be humbling. Regardless o f the fantasies these guys might have harbored for their favorite dancer, they were the ones getting screwed, so to cise than your average health nut. speak. But their money con tributed to my tip, which made This isn’t to say that a given it easier for me to ignore my dancer might not have a per conscience and just play the sonality as ugly as her body is music. beautiful. Make no mistake T he next group, thankfully about it: This is a cut-throat the smallest, were the guys business, and the name o f the looking for sex — confident game is money. If a dancer sus that if they got four or five lap pects that the deejay is playing dances and tipped generously, bad music, or the bouncers are they’ d have a dancer to take being a little too intim idating home for the night. These were for the clientele, or the bar also the guys who blew up at tender’s distracting the cus the bartender when she shut tomers from the show by talk them off, called the dancers ing too much, she’ll inevitably “dirty whores” when their gra start to think it’s affecting her tips. cious offer o f money for sex Moreover, very few dancers was refused, and sometimes had will keep their opinions on to be “escorted” out by a these matters to themselves. bouncer or two. The other thing that comes I can honestly say that I with stripping for a living — never knew o f a dancer who besides nightly take-home totals went home with a customer for o f $150 to $500 or more — is money. Any dancers suspected a nearly unshakeable self-confi o f — or caught — doing so dence. T he classic “insecurity dream” is to be naked in public; would find themselves fired in short order. For all we knew, once that no longer bothers half our customers were from you, nothing m uch will. the vice squad, and any strip The result is sometimes cat club is one accepted solicitation tiness, brutal gossip and out away from being shut down at right hostility. As a deejay, I any time. mustered all my soft-shoe dancT he third group o f cus ing-around-the-topic skills to tomers were the guys who just stay the hell out o f arguments, came in looking for a good because I worked, like the time, and these are every dancers, on tips and tips alone. dancer’s dream. They tip, they T he m andatory m inim um tipdon’t touch, they drink their out for the deejay was 7.5 per drinks, and they go home. cent o f each dancer’s take for Sometimes they’re a group o f the evening. Some tipped more, middle-aged men who took a if you treated them right — slight detour on the way home and I always did, much as my from the Elks Club. Sometimes stomach sometimes churned to they’re local college boys. do so. Sometimes they’re a bachelor In every other entertain party. m ent profession, women are This type observes the marginalized and often degrad Golden Rule o f strip clubs: ed. Some blue-nosed moralists Every dancer gets tipped no might claim that the very exis m atter what. (In case you don’t tence o f strip clubs does so as know, fellas: T he rule o f thum b well. I beg to differ. A strip for tipping is $1 m inim um to club lives and dies by its each dancer for every song she’s dancers, and the good ones onstage. If you feel so inspired, always get their way. In this line feel free to tip more.) T he only o f work, it’s the women who exception is if the dancer is run the show. unusually rude or abrasive. But I don’t think the majority o f do tip bad dancers who are our clientele is able to see past

The classic "insecurity dream" is to be naked in )ublic; once that no onger bothers you, nothing much will.

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showing some effort, because it might be their first or second night onstage, and it is sort of an awkward job. Oh, and tip your deejay if you like the music he or she is playing.

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know, I know, this is sup posed to be a story about what / did at my summer job. First of all, let me apolo gize on behalf o f all deejays everywhere for the music that sometimes gets played in strip clubs. I know how you feel. I was subjected to more Backstreet Boys than should be allowed under the Geneva Convention. The dancers pick out their own music; if you don’t like it, don’t blame the guy in the booth. O n one memorable evening, “Vixen” and “Pepper” — not their real names — danced to a combined total of seven D ef Leppard songs, all off Hysteria. I had to play, over the course o f five hours, “Pour Some Sugar on M e,” “Animal” (twice), “Armegeddon It,” “Hysteria” (twice), and “Love Bites.” And, o f course, there was all that Poison, Motley Criie and Bon Jovi. For a child o f the “alternative” revolution, it broke my heart. Sorry, Kurt. But for every dancer that dances to hair metal, there’s another who moves up a rung on rock’s evolutionary ladder and plays Janet Jackson, or M adonna, or Prince — preand post-glyph. And if you think that’s not a step in the right direction, I suggest you lock yourself in a room and play “Unskinny Bop” until you wet your pants and beg for a copy of Purple Rain. The best dancers, if I may say so, were the ones who danced to my music. T he great est set I ever concocted was for “Sheba,” which included Marilyn M anson’s “Sweet Dreams,” Type O Negative’s “Love You to Death” and the Violent Femmes’ “Color Me O nce.” O ther popular artists at the club were Tori Amos, Pearl Jam, Fiona Apple, Live and, despite all logic, Tool. There are some who would say I wasted my summer. After all, I attend one o f the coun try’s more prestigious small lib eral arts schools, one with a tremendously popular outreach program. W hy didn’t I take an internship with Time-Life, or study abroad in Malaysia, or at least pursue an independent research project with my advisor? To these people I say, there is only so far in this world that book-learnm will get you. After that, it comes down to drive, experience and, when all else fails, luck. Four years o f English majoring might guar antee you a 60-hour-a-week job in publishing for $12,000 a year. O ne summer o f deejaying will allow me to get a job at any club in the country and get paid to hang out with naked women. Now tell me: W ho’s the dummy? ®

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= O ne never knows the effect o f ^ T V and the com puter genera tion on intellectual stimulation. T3 ► ^ SD: M y mother, a retired reading = o teacher, is scandalized that some Z> = kids are graduating high school Z w ithout being able to read and write. W hat should we do fo r kids entering college w ithout these skills?

the environm ent o f Vermont preferable to life inside the Beltway. But he’s still looking out for the future o f education in his adopted state. This week, as thousands o f students o f all ages head back to school, Jack Crowl shares his thoughts on higher learning:

Pam ela P o lsto n

ou gotta figure a m an who started a publication called The Chronicle o f H igher' Education back in the late ’60s knows a thing or two about schools. Jack Crowl is that man, now retired to N orth Pomfret, Vermont, and enjoying the change from his former turbu lent tu rf in Washington, D .C. N ot that he’s lolling about on a porch swing: Crowl, who turned 63 this m onth, is a con tributing editor and writer for Vermont M agazine, a consul tant, volunteer and boardmember for nonprofits, and recently has been attending meetings, as a writer, o f the Vermont Higher Education Finance Commission — a group o f academics, legis lators and others who essential ly are “trying to find a way to get more m oney for colleges and universities somehow,” he says. This week Crowl’s dili gently poring over a three-inchthick stack o f papers on a sub ject that can cause extreme drowsiness even in the con tentious era o f Act 60: the finan cial restructuring o f education. Before he and his artist wife became full-time Vermonters eight years ago, Jack Crowl was up to his eyebrows in educa tion, from his first teaching job — in English and history — at a military academy in Virginia to his long tenure at The Chronicle, which remains a highly regarded resource for college administrators and fac ulty. Far from its shaky start, the 100-some page Chronicle now influences the opinions o f 93,000 subscribers in N orth America. In 1987, Crowl launched a sister publication, The Chronicle o f Philanthropy, and served as its publisher for three years before his retire ment. An insulin-dependent dia betic, Crowl finds the pace and

Seven Days-. W hat would you say has been the biggest overall change, or perhaps several big ones, in higher education in this country since you got into it? Jack Crowl: T hat’s a big ques tion. There are probably two or three or four things. O ne is just the size and scope o f the enter prise — it’s huge. Enrollment has probably doubled. There’s a demographic difference, too — more older students; now only about 55 percent o f students are at the traditional college age. In the Vermont Higher Education Finance C om m ission, someone was saying that

I think Act 60 was brilliant politically. It may not wash out as is -Jack Crowl just over 50 percent o f students in Vermont were in the 18 to 22 group. Also, the ties colleges now have with communities and business are bigger and stronger than ever before. W hen we started The Chronicle, there as a smaller num ber o f institutions, and they got a lot o f private, state and federal money. Now there are many ties with business. A nother big change: Colleges have become more than academic institutions, and one o f the major reasons is that costs have grown over the last

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costs. T he result is a huge debt load for students — $30,000 may be the average load when they’re out o f school. T h at also dictates the kinds o f jobs people are willing to take — not neces sarily the kinds o f jobs society might find useful.

decades. [Students aren’t] satis fied with dorms that look like monks’ cells; the dining halls don’t serve only mystery meat. People started having all these amenities — fancy health clubs, dining, dorms — and nobody wants to stop doing it because their competitors are offering them. These all cost something. Meanwhile, faculties are no longer willing to live in “genteel poverty” — they want a decent wage, and most get it. W ith all this plus the usual inflation, the cost o f college has skyrocketed.

SD : While your focus has been on higher education, what comes before it — down through ele mentary school and even preschool or day care centers — determines the qualifications o f students entering college. From that perspective, what have you seen in lower grades that’s, affected higher ed, fo r better or worse?

SD: So should we expect the legis lature to double the appropria tions next session? JC: Vermont has not got a good record on providing for college education; we’re usually last or second to last in the nation. UVM used to be private, and many people still don’t really think o f it as a state university — it lacks the usual loyalty. But [President] Judith Ramaley is trying to change that. VS AC is a big part o f the enterprise here — high tuition and high aid is the formula. It’s a nice theory, but the increase in aid hasn’t kept pace with the

JC: It’s awful. I don’t think any one should get out o f high school without being able to read and write. W hen I was a young education writer back in 1966, I went to a West Coast seminar and we were touring the California [school] system. People at Berkeley complained that 25 percent o f their fresh men had to take what they con sidered “bonehead English” — it’s not something that’s sud denly happened. It was a big deal throughout the ’60s and ’70s, remedial education. College teachers were saying ‘it’s not my job to teach people how to read and write.’ Every few years someone comes up with a new way to teach reading and writing; it flip-flops all the time — strictly rigorous standards vs. ‘if reading comic books will get them interested, let them read comic books.’ T he pendulum keeps swinging. SD : I understand you’re pro-Act 60. Can you explain why, and what would you like to say to those opposed? JC: T he Act 60 phenom enon has boggled my mind. It’s really one o f these issues in which there seems to be no middle ground — you’re either for it or agin’ it. In the 1996 legislative election campaign, the biggest issue was property tax reform; now people have nearly forgot ten it. T he huge reliance on property tax meant towns were turning down school budgets. A lot o f people who owned land didn’t have cash — it’s a huge tem ptation to sell land to

JC: Like everybody my age, we sit around and complain that kids don’t know all stuff we knew in the good old days. There may be a germ o f truth in that, but I’m not sure it’s quite the same. I have a friend switching to school teaching this year, and she’s concerned about the low interest in intel lectual affairs. I’m not sure I was so interested in intellectual pursuits back in high school. But the intellectual stuff some how seems to seep through.

C o n tin u ed on page 19

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Let others, the unelect, recall the quotidian, civil ian stuff: the aroma o f fresh bluejean denim, the gluey w hiff o f new textbooks, the sudden blindingyellow convoy o f schoolbuses on the landscape, the first eyeballing o f the teacher whose reputation for depravity had trickled through the lower grade levels. ^ For me, every back-to-school memory coalesces into one year, and that year into one day: the first day o f sixth grade in Hannibal, Missouri, when I stood in front o f my bedroom m irror and slipped on the sacred alabaster Badge and Belt. I shrugged off the weight o f mere m ortality and became a Patrol Boy.

It was a great time to be a good guy in America.

A form er p a tro l boy recalls his beat on the street

They’re vanished now from the American street corners: those slightly cheesy, self-important, unironic little kids smelling o f W ildroot and wear ing their heavy white canvas belts held in place by that dramatic diagonal sling over the shoulder. Yeah, I know, we’re talking guys-only here. It was the ’50s. D am n shame. Ever on the alert to snap their arms straight outward like scarecrows to pre vent their schoolmates from blundering into the thoroughfare when cars were approaching. We’re talking guys, but we’re talking good guys. Now the grownups have taken over. T he pro fessionals. Now we have Crossing Guards; fluores cence; hand-held stop signs, Polaroid shades. Benefits, no doubt; the whole Blue Cross/Blue Shield works. A Jack Nicholson movie, for G od’s sake. But there was a time. A time when the crushing anonym ity and powerlessness and herd routine of kidhood could be transcended for 15 minutes every m orning and 15 minutes every afternoon, before and after sixth-grade classes, by the ritual of donning the Badge and Belt and becoming, in that one gesture, a good guy. And then taking up one’s station on the appointed corner, sworn by the oath o f office — yes, there was an oath o f office — to save young lives. And if necessary, to kick some ass and take names. Well, in my case, to take names. I had waited for five years to wear that Badge and Belt. I had come upon my first Patrol Boy as a first-grader, shuffling dopily along through the fall en leaves toward M ark Twain School, and been wowed nearly senseless when he stuck his arms out at the curb, holding me back from what could have C o n tin u ed on n ext page

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C o n tin u ed fro m page 1 7 been a fatal encounter w ith a Studebaker. I mean, the grandeur, the duende, the responsibility! And to top it all off, he was only a kid, like me! A m uch bigger kid, but in my range. Five years. If I could just hold out five years, and keep my nose clean, and not flunk out o f school, that Badge and Belt could be mine. To be honest about it, you could keep the Badge. It was the Belt I wanted. T hat snazzy diagonal slash across the chest, like frozen light ning. T hat belt tantalized me so much when 1 looked at it, or even thought about it, that I used to do funny things with my m outh, to

Diagonal belt, man. You had to go all the way to the T on Superman's chest to trump it. make sure I was keeping a poker face. Diagonal belts were practically the trade mark o f good guys. O f policemen, like our own Officer Capp, who had memorized the Five W ’s o f Traffic Safety and led funer als on his motorcycle. O f Royal Canadian Mounties. O f cavalrymen in the movies — at least the ones who did n’t wear suspenders. Suspenders were a notch or two down from diagonal belts. They tended to make the wearer look less like a hero than like a grade-school principal who happened to own a sabre. Diagonal belt, man. You had to go all the way to the “S” on Super man’s chest to trum p it. So there I stood in front o f the m irror on that September m orning in 1953. First day o f sixth grade. Patrol Boy. Arms stiff at my sides. Doing funny things with my m outh to keep it frozen in poker-face. Stalin had died that March. T he Korean War was over. T he first hydrogen bom b explosion was five m onths away. In Mississippi, young Em m ett Till was still alive. Rosa Parks hadn’t refused to stand up yet. Dien Bien Phu hadn’t fallen. Little Rock was still just the capital o f Arkansas. And only the U.S. marshalls were allowed to wear guns. It was a great time to be a good guy in America. I tightened my canvas belt, gave m y W ildrooted hair a last lick, and went charging out the front door and through the fallen leaves o f St. M arys Avenue to take up my post, just a neighbor hood block from M ark Twain School. I never dreamed that my side would lo s e .©

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HEAD OF THE CLASS C o n tin u ed fro m page 1 6 condo developers. T he idea was to keep property tax from rising. O ne o f the problems there was that Vermont relies on property tax for education more than most states. They promised to keep property tax from going up, and the Governor vowed not to raise income tax. The Supreme C ourt said our current way o f funding schools was unconstitutional. I think Act 60 was bril liant politically. It may not wash out as is — its hard on the “gold” towns and small businesses. I don’t see the socalled solutions that have been bandied about as hav ing a lot o f m erit...I think it would have been simpler and fairer to raise income tax, but Dean was adamant against it — he thought it would make Vermont look bad and prevent business from moving here. T hat left the legislature in a bit o f a pickle.

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JC: It’s really amazing. I can now sit here in my office in the woods in Vermont and do just about anything I could do anywhere, other than face-to-face conversa tions. To the younger gener ation, it’s just a given. There’s a Dave Barry joke about how to install pro grams on your computer: It’s really difficult to get help from com puter companies; it’s cheaper to adopt a sixyear-old. Technology has a tremendous impact on how we run our lives and do our business. It obviously will have an impact on educa tion. Some o f the more wellfinanced schools have a com puter for nearly every child; poor schools have vir tually none. If kids come up through the school system without learning how to use them, they’ll be handicapped in the job market later on, and it will just exacerbate the disparity. SD : I f you were God — that is, i f money were no object — what would you do fo r educa tion? JC: If money were no object, I would triple teacher salaries. O ne o f the reasons you don’t get a larger per centage o f really top-notch teachers is because they can make more money in other jobs. I really enjoyed teach ing, and felt I was doing a good job for society, but the prospects for getting any kind o f reasonable income were slim. ®

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SCHOOLS OF THOUGHT

Why are more Vermonters opting fo r private education?

Kevin

J .

K e lle y

he departure from public schools can’t be called an exodus, exactly, but in the Burlington area, more and more families are going private — choosing private schools,

that is, for their children in ele m entary through secondary grades. It’s a trend that poses potential challenges to democ ratic educational values and, at the same time, promotes alter natives to mass-market acade mics.

The increasing popularity of nondenominational private education is evident both in the rising enrollment at established private schools and in efforts to create additional schools out side both the public and reli gious systems.

W hen classes begin next week, about 60 students will be attending Shelburne’s Renaissance School, which offers classes from kindergarten through third grade — twice the num ber who went there last year. A similar surge has

occurred during the past rive years at the Lake Champlain W aldorf School, also based in Shelburne, where 225 children will take part in its kinder garten-through-eighth-grade program. T he 28-year-old Schoolhouse, the area’s oldest nonreligious independent school, reports full enrollment o f 56 students in its K-6 classes, offered in Burlington’s Old N orth End. At the middle and sec ondary levels, the Gailer School anticipates having about 80 stu dents at its new location at Shelburne Commons. In South Burlington, the Vermont Com m ons School will attract some 50 students in its second year of operation. Despite their expansion, these private schools remain small in comparison to their public counterparts. T hat hap pens to be one o f their main selling points. W ith class sizes averaging a dozen students or fewer, many parents believe their children will receive greater attention and more individualized instruction than is typically provided in the pub lic school classroom. T he secular character o f these schools notwithstanding, some o f them also emphasize the spiritual and moral develop m ent o f their students. The prospect o f having a son or daughter receive an ethical grounding appeals to families who may not favor instruction in a particular creed, but who worry that public schools slight the moral dimension o f educa tion.

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Private schools are also gen erally perceived as fostering a more orderly learning environ m ent than the public class room, yet not as strict as most religious schools. Behavioral problems that public schools must seek to solve — or at least alleviate — are thought to be far less com m on at schools that may select or reject whomever they wish. Indeed, a couple o f the independent institutions state explicitly that they offer a “safe” setting for students. A nother lure for parents is the innovative, specialized cur ricula that m ost private schools have developed. Recruiters often tout the comparatively greater am ount o f time devoted to music and the visual arts, while also highlighting an “inte grative” approach to various subjects and a “hands-on” or “experiential” learning process. Local private schools that follow a detailed model, such as the W aldorf approach, pio neered earlier in the century by Rudolph Steiner, exhibit unique features that set them apart not only from the public norm but from most independent schools as well. For instance, children at a W aldorf school usually have the same teacher for grades one through eight. Those schools not part o f a larger educational movement have some o f their own distin guishing characteristics. For the Renaissance School, its setting at Shelburne Farms affords bountiful opportunities for outdoor learning. T he Schoolhouse, operating out o f rented space at St. Joseph’s

School in Burlington, functions as a parents’ cooperative that obviates the need for a full-time paid administrative staff. At Gailer, students m ust sign a contract com m itting themselves

Public schools, which educate more than 90 percent o f the * country’s youth, had been slow, he concedes, in adjusting to the heightened expectations prom pted by radical shifts in

home. But that combined total is still only one-tenth the enrollment in the states public schools. At the same time, the num ber o f private schools has been

T m not sure that we can accurately talk about a single 'public' out there. What we have now are many interest groups pushing and pulling the curriculum in different directions." - Bob Skiff, Vermont Commons School to “ 100 percent homework completion” and at least 80 per cent mastery o f the subject m atter — private school code for a “B” grade. Vermont C om m ons School, situated next to the University o f Vermont’s Horticultural Farm, puts an emphasis on learning about the history and ecology o f the Cham plain Valley. “Dissatisfaction with public schooling is a com m on factor” leading families to choose alter natives such as the Renaissance School, says its principal, Diane Rooney. T hat explanation is endorsed, conditionally, by Angelo Dorta, head o f the Vermont public school teachers’ union. Concerns about the quality o f public elementary and sec ondary education have been raised repeatedly since the release 15 years ago o f a federal report critical o f the nation’s schools. D orta says this inten sive scrutiny — and the ongo ing reforms it provoked — was warranted in some respects.

the nations economy and work force. But Vermont’s schools were never as crisis-ridden as those in many states with urban concen trations. And by nearly every objective measurement, D orta points out, Vermont public schools are performing better today than they were 15 or 30 years ago. Dorta, also the president o f the Vermont chapter o f the National Education Association (NEA) professes to be unthreat ened by the growth o f the pri vate-school alternative in the Burlington area and elsewhere in the state. The popularity of non-public education tends to rise and fall cyclically, he says, noting that private schools enjoyed a surge o f enrollment in the 1970s, followed by a sta sis in the ’80s. At present, about 8000 Vermont primary and sec ondary students are enrolled in either religious or secular pri vate schools, while close to 2000 are being educated at

increasing, according to the Vermont D epartm ent o f Education. About 115 parochial and secular indepen dent schools are listed by the state as either “recognized” or “approved.” T he latter designa tion is contingent on a more detailed evaluation process that qualifies nonreligious schools in that category to receive tuition payments from towns lacking public schools. Economic conditions also affect enrollments. Todays rela tive prosperity allows a larger proportion o f Burlington-area families to choose alternatives with hefty tuition price tags — ranging from $3900 a year at the Schoolhouse to $9000 at the Vermont Com m ons School. The local independents all offer scholarship aid o f some form, and their administrators contest the view that these schools cater almost exclusively to an upper-middle-class clien tele. Some make strong efforts to prom ote economic diversity within their student bodies, but

in general private schools edu cate few children with learning disabilities or difficult behav ioral issues. T he laws o f consumer capi talism also apply more directly at private schools, suggests Rooney. Schools dependent on tuition payments feel stronger pressure to provide families with exactly what they’re seek ing, she says. In addition, par ents driving students to and from these non-neighborhood institutions are usually able to see teachers twice a day, allow ing immediate opportunities for consultation. But it’s actually public schools that are more account able, argues Dorta. He notes that local school boards are democratically elected, not pri vately chosen, and that the local com m unity has a direct voice in establishing curricula. Public school curricula are constandy in flux, however, observes Bob Skiff, founder o f the Vermont Com m ons School and the former president o f Cham plain College. “I’m not sure that we can accurately talk about a single public’ out there,” he says. “W hat we have now are many interest groups pushing and pulling the cur riculum in different directions.” Public education is some times seen as lacking clear direction and having too per missive an attitude toward stu dent behaviors. “Public schools have chosen to create the envi ronm ents they’ve got,” Skiff maintains. “They don’t need to tolerate all that they do. C o n tin u ed on n ext page

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Education doesn’t have to be the way it is in public schools, which is why I decided to start Vermont C om m ons.” Anna Benson, a Weybridge m other personal ly familiar w ith public and private schooling, agrees that the independent option is often far preferable. Both her sons attended the private Bridge School in M iddlebury from first through sixth grades, and the older one graduated two years ago from Gailer. But one o f the boys chose to go to the local middle school for seventh grade. He was drawn to be part o f a larger and more diverse student body, Benson says. But that year in public school proved “dreadful” for her son. “He became angry, sad, depressed and bitter,” Benson says, after being treated at the Bridge School with “respect, care, celebra tion and love.” T he boy was “unprepared to be in classes with teachers who didn’t seem to care about him .” He was also bullied at M iddlebury Junior High and made to feel unsafe, she says. Benson takes strong issue with public-school defenders who depict private schools as hothouses for a pampered elite. She describes her own family as “moderate- or lower-income,” recounting an economic struggle in which “every cent we don’t use goes to our children’s education.” At Gailer, she says, “Kids are kids — rowdy, funny, naughty. It’s not at all a typical prep school atmosphere. “All the talk about being in ‘the real world’ at public school often just comes down to accepting that peo ple are being mean to one another,” Benson maintains. At the Bridge School, by contrast — and at Gailer, where her younger son is now happily enrolled — “students are given what they need, and are not allowed to not do well.” D otty McCarthy, a Burlington m other o f three, is having what am ounts to an opposite experience of public school. H er oldest child attendee the Schoolhouse from grade one through five and then enrolled in Edm unds M iddle School — for some o f the same reasons that Benson’s son wanted to experience public education. “It’s been very positive for him ,” M cCarthy says o f her son, about to enter eighth grade. She expresses satisfac tion with Edm unds’ faculty, and says the school usually C o n tin u ed on page 3 6

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1998

you’ll be second-guessing every one; a semester o f Critical T hinking and no one will ever ell, well, well. Look who’s be able to do right by you back for another go again. Ever. Maybe you’ll even around on the tea cup end up with your own column ride called college. They let you in this newspaper. Class starts back in, did they? Glad to see at 10 a.m., which clearly isn’t a you just the same. We know good time. how busy you are planning those back-to-school parties, so RESUM E W R IT IN G we studied the course catalogs (DET003V I, CCV) for you and picked out a few You’ve taken a break from you’re sure to love. O r not. writing, have you, and are now As always, paym ent is due itching to get back into it? This in full before your registration class will have you writing again can be finalized. O h, we know in n o ...o h , resum twriting. you’re good for it, but our Never mind. hands are tied. Policy, you Bv

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know. Go on, make us proud. BASIC M A TH B RU SH -U P (DEV018N, CCV) W hat are you, some kind o f masochist? Until you came along, only O rpheus had volun tarily put him self through Hell. And you remember what hap pened to him? Obviously not. T hink about it: It’s been four years since you took a math course in high school, and, soon enough, you’ll realize all over again you have no idea what frickin’ purpose the qua dratic equation serves, let alone why you should memorize it. Boys, you’ll suddenly and w ith out warning get strange sensa tions in your groins that will keep you from going to the black board — for old time’s sake. C RITIC A L T H IN K IN G (H U M 1005, W oodbury College) W ho says universities can’t keep up w ith the times and the ever-evolving needs o f their stu dent bodies? This class is essen tial for each and every Gen-Xer who fancies him or herself a high-falutin, erudite mo’fo. O ne m onth into this class and

august

26,

1998

H O W D O TH EY K N O W TH EY KNOW? (PRV 2093, W oodbury College) T h at’s what we want to know, too. Q uite frankly, we’ve always wondered who “they” are, as in “they say th a t...” Admittedly, we have no idea what the hell this class is about. But we figure, if you sign up you’ll find out soon enough and can let us know. CRYSTALS, CO LO R S & C O N N E C T IO N S (C M D 312, CCV) O h, come on! W hat is this?!? Could it be one too many people have read The Celestine Prophecy? You’d better be on your best behavior for this one; we’d hate to make your aura stay after class clean ing erasers. Besides, our inner m om wouldn’t want you to be late for your numerology class. D E C IS IO N M AKING M ETHODS (BSAD 160, UVM) In the past, this class focused on such decision-mak ing techniques as Decision Trees and SDL Analysis. After running the numbers, and

countless hours o f debate amongst the faculty, we’ve found them to be a waste o f time. Instead, we’ve reverted back to the classic, tried-andtrue techniques: eenie-meenieminey-mo, heads or tales, picka-hand, and, everybody’s favorite, one potato, two potato. BUSINESS & PROFESSIONAL W R IT IN G (ENG 110VI, CCV) So, you’re thinking about making a business o f writing. Finally, you and your parents will be able to agree on a vision o f your future: writing and get ting paid. Business and profes sional writing. Professional writing and business. Having your cake and eating it, too. H m m m m . Surely, you do real ize you have a better chance o f winning the lottery twice than you do fulfilling this pipe dream, don’t you? M ATH A PPLIC A TIO N IN LAW (LAW 2089, W oodbury College) It’s quite easy, really. A win ning lawyer need only know one simple fraction: 1/3. T h at’s their take. O f course, it couldn’t hurt to have a working under standing o f the quadratic equa tion, either (see Basic M ath Brush-up). R EM O TE SENSING (ENS428A, M iddlebury College) This class is basically dows ing for the ’9 0 s...sort of. W ith so many pieces o f high-tech junk cluttering your room, how is any o f it going to make your life any easier if you keep losing the dam n remote control that operates them? Fear not, the rigorous perception training and intensive thought-control techniques offered in this class

SEVEN DAYS

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This class is essen tial for each and every Gen-Xer who fancies him or herself a high falutin, erudite mo'fo. AQUATICS (HPE206A, JSC) You’ve been begging for it and Johnson State has listened. This is the class you’ve been dreaming about since child hood’s hottest sum m er days. The beauty o f this class is it defies all strata: social, gender and otherwise. It doesn’t m atter whether you passed your end less summers at the country club pool under the watchful eye o f the nanny whilest m um was having her tennis lesson with Bradley, the club pro, and daddy was getting drunk on the back nine, or you goofed off at the suspiciously warm com m u nity pool. D id you ever in your wildest dreams imagine you could receive as many credits for a giddy game o f Marco Polo as you could for Industrial Microbiology? After all, educa tion is subjective. Bring your water wings, but be warned: spazzes will be confined to the shallow end.

PRO BA BILITIES & STATISTICS (M ATH 239, UVM) We’ve run the numbers, and it doesn’t look good for you. T he probability o f you getting an A is slim to none, and slim left about five minutes ago. The one decent test mark you do receive will inevitably be thrown out. They call it an out lier. Tough break, kid. M IC R O E T H N O G R A P H Y (A N TH 284, UVM) D on’t let the title intimidate you. It’s just our pretentious way o f saying, here, take this m icrophone and point it towards those people over there. If you study real hard, and with a little luck, you might just go on to be a boom operator. W ouldn’t your parents be proud? Imagine: a boom opera tor and a paid writer. Hey, a person can dream. D on’t think you can cut the mustard in M icroethnography? D on’t sweat it, there’s a thousand mic stands out there just waiting to take your place. BASEBALL & T H E A M ER I CAN LEGAL SYSTEM (LAW 2081, W oodbury College) T his workshop uses America’s favorite pastime — no, not law-breaking, though we’re open to debate on this — to outline many aspects o f law, including deadbeat fathers, con tracts and skirting m andatory drug tests in the workplace. Admittedly, these topics are not covered in depth, but no matter what the judge tells you, you tell him or her that ignorance is still an acceptable excuse for the law in your dugout. Good luck, slugger. 0

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Jerom e Kern

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august

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d o lla rs

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Peppers, Eggplant Potatoes, Onions, Garlic, Carrots, Daikon, Strin g beans, Leeks, Fresh H erbs and much more ...

Follow Barber Farm Road 1 mile from RL 117 (River Road), then 1000 feet up Schillhammer Road. Also at the Burlington & Winooski farmer's markets. Open 1 1 - 7 weekdays & 1 1 - 6 weekends

For in fo rm a tio n call 8 9 9 - 5 1 2 3

Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgendered, & Questioning (GLBTQ ) e challenges o f childrearing. Babysitting :s with the program at the King Street

H O LISTIC HEALTH LECTURE:

etc

Felicia Foster offers an introduction to

•uth Center, Burlington, 6-8 p.m. Free,

BATTERED W O M E N ’S SU PPO R T

fo, 800-639-4014.

G RO UPS: W omen Helping Battered

^RENTING GRO UP: M om s and dads

W om en facilitates a support group for

mpare notes on parenting a school-age

abused people in Burlington, 6:30-8 p.m.

ild. Bring your lunch to the Family

Free. Info, 658-1996.

^nnection Center, 23 George St.,

R H O M B U S O PE N H O USE: This

ltlington, noon. Free. Info, 859-0934.

informal “hobnob” with board mem bers,

TORIES: Children listen, snack and

volunteers an d ms.

Ayurvedic healing — a holistic East Indian medicine that involves diet,

thursday

865-3144. FREEDO M T O MARRY’ M EETING:

OUNTAIN BIKE RACES: The illiston woods host weekly cycle races varying length and difficulty. O utdoor tperience at Catamount, W illiston, 6

Gay and lesbian marrying types in M ontpelier get together to strategize. Vermont C A .R .E .S. office, 73 Main St., Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 229-2504.

m- $3-8. Info, 879-6001.

drama ‘LYSISTRATA’: See August 26. ‘CRAZY FOR Y O U ’: See August 26. ‘SPID ER ’S W E B ’: See August 26, 8 p.m. T H E M O S T H APPY FELLA’: See August 26, 8 p.m. ‘DEA TH AT T H E D U D E R A N C H ’:

continued on next page

august

2 6,

1998

BY:

1. Being a Role Model & Fadlitating a GLBTQ Youth Group

OR: 2. Being a Speaker on Homophobia, Heterosexism & GLBTQ Youth

Outright Vermont invites you to tour our facilities, enjoy light refreshments, and meet with staff and current volunteers to learn more about these exciting volunteer opportunities

B ^ ^ ^ o n T S p - m . Donations. Info,

port

H ow C an You H elp:

Burlington, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 863-2569.

College

■nooski, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 6 5 5-1537.

(so do their friends, teachers, families, clergy & communities)

lifestyle and herbs. Healthy Living, S.

,osip o h e o

ike crafts at the Children’s Pages,

Youth Need You!

SEVEN DAYS

Please attend our open house on Weds., Sept. 9th from 5:00 - 8:30 p.m. For more information call us @ 1-800-GLB-Chat or 865-9677 RSV P is encouraged but not required child care is available upon request People of color, bisexual women & men, and transgender people are encouraged to apply

page

T h e Spirit o f Ethan Allen puts murder

878-3550.

Montpelier, 7:30 p.m. $10. Info,

on the m enu with an interactive, float

SU M M E R STARGAZING: Explore

899-4008.

ing sp in -off o f City Slickers. Leaving

constellations, craters o f the m oon and

CAN D L EL IG H T CONCERT:

from the Burlington Boathouse, 6:30

the wonders o f the Milky Way. North

Frederick Jodry plays selections from

p.m. $34.95. Info, 8 62-8300.

Branch Nature Center, Montpelier, 9

Bach’s “Well-Tempered Clavier” on the

A U D IT IO N S: Champlain Arts

p.m. $3. Info, 229-6206.

harpsichord at O ld West Church,

Theater Com pany is seeking actors for

NATURALIST LECTURE:

Calais, 7:30 p.m. $8. Info, 426-3432.

Endangered species o f Vermont are the

B U R L IN G T O N TAIKO D R U M

focus o f a slide presentation at the Mt.

MERS: This percussive performance

Mansfield Hostel, Vermont State Ski

by the Burlington ensemble is the

Dorm , Route 108, Stowe, 7 p.m. Free.

modern practice o f an ancient art

Info, 253-4010.

form. Haskell Opera House, Derby

VER M O NT VENTURE NET

Line, 7 p.m. $10. Info, 334-1357.

three upcom ing adult shows, including / Never Sang fa r M y Father and Silent Contract, about sexual harassment in the workplace. 1 Main St., Burlington, 6-9 p.m. Free. Info, 860 -3611.

film

W ORK: Investor types interact with

‘STATIO NS O F T H E ELEVATED’:

entrepreneurs, managers and service

drama

Manfried Kircheimer shows and dis

providers at the Radisson Hotel,

‘LYSISTRATA’: See August 26, $12.50

cusses his cinematic study o f subway

Burlington, 8-10 a.m. $15. Info,

‘CRAZY FOR Y O U ’: See August 26.

trains, with soundtrack by Charles

658-7820.

‘SPIDER’S W EB’: See August 26, 8

Mingus. H elen D ay Arts Center,

H IST O R IC R U T L A N D TO UR:

p.m.

Stowe, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 253-8358.

Volunteers in local and architectural

August 26, 8 p.m.

the successful publication o f Views

A U D IT IO N S: See August 27.

LAZY W RITERS FO RUM : Share

Through Time. Departing from Depot

‘IN SU R R E C T IO N MASS’: This non

your writing in progress in a supportive

Park, Rutland, 10 a.m. $2. Info,

religious service includes radical texts

workshop environment. Kellogg-

775-5413.

spoken and sung, cantastorias and

ROYAL LIPPIZAN STALLIONS:

“funeral marches for rotten ideas.”

T h e high-stepping white stallions offer

Bread & Puppet Theater, Glover, 8

equine entertainment four times a

p.m. Donations. Info, 525-3031.

Hubbard Library, Montpelier, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 2 23-3338.

kids

week in North Hero, 6 p.m. $15. Info,

PARENTS A N O N Y M O U S : See August 26. Chittenden C ounty Food Shelf, Burlington. ‘N E W TITL ES’ STO RY TIM E: Stuffed animals are welcom e at this “bearable” reading o f new books for

372-5683.

V O LUN TEER PICNIC: Anyone who

8 6 3-5966.

helped clear ice storm debris from the

U SE D IN S T R U M E N T SALE: Shop

Long Trail is welcome at this picnic

for second-hand instruments, sheet

celebration hosted by the Green

music and accessories at a benefit sale

Mountain Club, Route 100, Waterbury

for the O nion River Arts Council. See

Center, 4:30-7 p.m. Free. Info,

“to do” list, this issue. Christ Church,

244-7037.

Montpelier, 9 a.m. - 2 p.m. Free. Info,

etc

229-9408.

ROYAL LIPIZZAN STALLIONS: See

o f Bach’s Brandenburg Concerti -— in

August 27.

one night — under the direction o f

FLORAL D ESIG N DEM O : The royal

Yuli Turovsky. Hunter Park,

flower arrangers at the wedding o f

Manchester, Grounds open at 4:30

Princess Diana show their stuff to ben

p.m. Concert starts at 7 p.m. $9-29.

efit the Nature Conservancy. United

Info, 8 0 0 -876-9293.

Church o f Craftsbury, Craftsbury

‘T H E BREAD BAKER’S CANTATA’:

Com m on, 1:30-3:30 p.m. $15. Info,

Bread and Puppet Theater is famous

BALLROOM N IG H T S: Merengue

Shuman localizes his discussion about

masters whip you into shape before a

“creating self-reliant communities in a

night o f ballroom dancing. Sunset

global age.” See “to do” list, this issue.

Rooftop Ballroom, Holiday Inn

Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 7-9

Express, 8:30 p.m. $12. Info,

Essex Junction, 7 p.m. $26-29. Info,

1 M USICI D E M O NTREAL: Hear all

229-4425.

for its sourdough rye. Get the musical

O PE N OBSERVATORY: Get a good

story behind the baking at Bread and

look at the summer sky with members

Puppet Theater, Glover, 7 p.m.

o f the Vermont Astronomical Society.

Donations. Info, 525-3031.

Hinesburg, 9 p.m. - midnight. Free.

LATE N IG H T CABARET: A melodi

Info and directions, 985-3269.

ous melange o f songs from stage,

G LB TQ SU PP O R T GRO UP: Gay,

screen and concert hall adds entertain

lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and

m ent to the dessert menu at Bellinis

questioning youth make new friends

Restaurant, Montpelier, 10:30 p.m. $5.

and get support. Outright Vermont,

Info, 223-5300.

dance

‘G O IN G LOCAL’: Author Michael

p.m. Free. Info, 660-0640.

issue. Champlain Valley Fairgrounds,

‘T H E M O ST HAPPY FELLA’: See

history lead a walking tour based on

words

sport

Burlington, 6:30-9 p.m. Free. Info,

‘T H E PROPER LADIES’: The a cap-

800-452-2428.

pclla& uo o f Anabel Graetz and

BATTERED W O M E N ’S SU PPO R T

Deborah Goss samples stories and

G ROUP: W omen Helping Battered

songs from turn-of-the-century

Women facilitates a group in

Vermont. Haskell Opera H ouse, 7

Burlington, 9:30-11 a.m. Free. Info,

p.m. $10. Info, 334-1357.

658-1996.

862-2207.

drama

864-8001.

film

‘CRAZY FOR Y O U ’: See August 26.

STORY H O U R : Kids learn from

‘A STRANGER IN T H E K ING

lighthearted literature in a country set

D O M ’: T he All Arts Council o f

ting. Flying Pig Childrens Books, Ferry

Franklin County screens the Jay

kids. Barnes & N oble Bookstore, S. Burlington, 3 p.m. Free. Info,

Rd., Charlotte, 10:30 a.m. Free. Info,

music

425-2600.

U SE D IN ST R U M E N T SALE:

‘LYSISTRATA’: See August 26, $12.50. ‘SPID ER ’S W E B ’: See August 26, 4 & 8:30 p.m.

music

Craven film about a small Vermont

Looking to sell that second-hand

etc

squeeze box? Drop off your second

HEPATITIS-C SU P P O R T GRO UP:

hand instruments today for the sale

Three million Americans suffer from

tomorrow. Appraisers will be on hand.

this still-incurable liver disease. A sup

See “to do” list, this issue. Christ

port group meets at Fanny Allen

Church, Montpelier, 3-7 p.m. Free.

Hospital, Colchester, 6:30 p.m. Free.

Info, 229-9408.

Info, 453 -5 5 3 2 .

‘FROM V EN IC E T O VERSAILLES’:

TO ASTM ASTER S M EETING :

Ensemble Soleil present a concert trac

T H E M O ST HAPPY FELLA’: See

town shattered by racism. Missisquoi

'FROM VEN IC E T O VERSAILLES’:

Valley Union High School Theatre,

See August 28, College Street

7:30 p.m. $6. Info, 633-2306.

Congregational Church, Burlington.

‘T H E PROLETARIANS’: This giant

kids

rockers who headlined Another

T E EN N IG H T : Bring an instrument

Roadside Attraction play in support

to play or share, or be part o f the

their new album, Phantom Power. See

“Friday night at the Improv” audience.

“sound advice,” this issue. Mount

Westford Library, 7:30-9:30 p.m. Free.

Ellen, Sugarbush North, Fayston, 6

Info, 879-6808.

p.m. $24.50. Info, 862-5300.

STORY H O UR: Toddlers listen to sto

RANDY TRAVIS: The crooner credit

from its origins in Italy to pre-revolu

ries at the Milton Public Library, 10:30

ed with reviving country music sings

Econolodge Conference Center, S.

tionary France. Bethany Church,

a.m. Free. Info, 893-4644.

up a storm with special guest Martina

WED,AUG 12 NO COVER 2I+/SSUNPER

THE SKOIDATS

TH E A L L S T O N IA N S P E R F E C T T H Y R O ID THU, AUG 2 7 $ 5 A L L A G ES

D YSFU N KSH U N BEATS DOW N J-B A S E

B A R

g WED

G R I L L

8/26^®5SA ^ 0 \ / A MGHT

§ ■

? p.M. g

WITH MEMBERS oF *ELI2*EHA | 1oRAUGE FAcToRy

m Ti l

CONSTRUCTION JO E INVISIBLE JE T 9PM S3

V W : THE ERRATICS m i S3 l l A SKA DANCE PARTY JOHN BROWN'S BODY U J REGGAE 9 pm $4

sun

FRANCIS DUNNERY 7 pm S8 RETRONOME 10 pm free NOBODY DOES rrDEADER 9 PM S3

! TH 1/27

SQUAGMYRE DEAD HIPPY WALKIN BIRD

TOOTS & THE MAYTALS TU E , SEP 8 $ 1 6 T IX 1 8 +

Need We Say More! 229-0070 126 N. Main Street • Barre 27 State Street • Montpelier

@ HIGHER GROUND E M A IL U S! T O A S T @ T O G E T H E R .N E T T IC K E T S A V A IL @ S T R A W B E R R IE S - P U R E P O P T O N ES - FLY N N T H EA T R E W / C R ED IT CA R D @ (8 0 2 ) 8 6 3 -5 9 6 6 W W W .T IC K ET W EB .C O M

SEVEN DAYS

BARBAcoA

in, , m oRAHGE fAcToRy FUNK I ACID SOUL

! SAT 1/29

JAMES HARVEY

» P.M.

JAZZ

l.utvn MortSTER TRUcIt , , J ORIGINAL WACKO MUSIC

136

CHURCH STREET • BURLINGTON 3

859-8909

METRO LOUNGE 9 pm

free

» P.M. |

GUITAR NOIR

M AGIC HAT & ELYPTICA L PRESEN T W EDNESDAY NIGHT JAM BO REE

PEN DAILY

A M D

1z i o3

REAL M U SIC

TOAST CONCERTS PRESENTS

page

pulse and come to grips with their

BATTERSHELL THE HALOGENS GLADLY FRI.AUG 21 $10 TIX ALL AGES

26 Main S t MoirtpeHer 229-0509 1-888-676-0509

house and her servants awake with no

----------- 1

WED, SEP ^ NO COVER 2 1 + 5 5 UNDER

THE SAVOY THEATER

edy by Keefe Healy the lady o f the

MISSING JOE CURRENTLY NAMELESS

D A lffl?H E L IF E SCOUNDRELS MON, AUG 31 $7 ALL AGES 8PM

8:30 only

M r a n m im

T O N IG H T ’: In this clever adult com

F7H LO BSTER Z FR O M M A R Z

THE WIND IN THE WILLOWS

kjlASyEQ^

525-3031.

M AGIC HAT & ELYPTICA L PRESENT W EDNESDAY NIGHT JA M BOREE

SA T,AU G 29 $ 3 2 I+ / S 5 UNDER

6:30 only(2 PM also S a t & Sun.)

Glover, 8 p.m. Donations. Info,

J f O U R E A W H Q T H I S T IF S O J A S O H K E E P S H IS P r r i^

cafeG bistro

FRI. 8/21' THURS. 8/27

harsh reality. Bread & Puppet Theater,

McBride. See “sound advice,” this

Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info,

36 main street - winooski - 655.9081

discrepancies between high ideals and

‘W HEREVER YO U MAY BE

munication and leadership skills at the

A VA ILA BLE FO R PRIVA TE PARTIES

and colossal papier-mach^ characters caught in the struggle to resolve the

ing the route o f the Baroque violin

Eggs Benedict ^ Belgian W affles - Omelets Fresh Fru it Granola - Fresh Squeezed Orange Juice

puppet melodrama features colorful

‘TRAGICALLY H IP ’: The Canadian

Wannabe public speakers develop com

BREAKFAST SERVED UNTIL3PM

August 26, $21-27.

S»rOSJIi*IHJ.ONKlV3UnOA3MVNNV!NVOSa'-

nUPCOMING EVENTS!

DJ'S MARTIN & MITCHELL

9 PM FREE

9/3 SW INGER'S BALL-DANCE CONTEST & LESSONS $250 IN PRIZES 9/5 ALVIN YOUNGBLOOD HART (FOLK BLUES) 7 PM 9/6 THE BOTTLE ROCKETS. MARAH (AMERICAN ROCK) 9/9 WALTER "W OLFM AN " WASHINGTON 8 PM 9/13 COCO MONTOYABLUES GUITAR 9/20 TINY TOWN - FORMER SUBDUDES 9/21J2 JONATHA BROOKE 7 PM 9/27 PAPERBOYS (IRISH) 10/11 JIM M Y JOHNSON (BLUES)

188 M A IN ST. • 865.4563 FOR TICKETS CALL 86.FLYNN

august

26,

1998

“afterlife.” Cambridge Elementary

Museum, W oodstock, 10 a.m. - 5 p.m.

Fayston, 1 p.m. $32.50. Info, 800-

School, Jeffersonville, 8 p.m.

$7. Info, 457-2355.

587-8427.

Donations. Info, 6 44-2233.

•

Mountain Club hosts a hike up

male a cappella quintet. Grandstand,

Ampersand, which affords great views

Champlain Valley Fairgrounds, Essex

T H E LETTERM AN: Specializing in

o f the High Peaks. Meet at UV M

Junction, 7 p.m. $25. Info, 863-5966.

love ballads like “The Way You Look

Visitor Lot, Burlington. Free.' Call for

O P E N REHEARSAL: W omen com pare notes at a harmonious rehearsal o f

‘A N N IE ’ A U D IT IO N S : Lyric Theatre

etc

is seeking talent for its fall production

ROYAL LIPIZZAN STALLIONS: See

Tonight,” the harmonious trio takes

time, 863-1145.

o f Annie. Full-throated girls with

August 27, 2:30 p.m.

you back before The Beatles.

MT. A SC U T N EY HIKE: Bring lunch

the Champlain Echoes. S. Burlington,

orphan aspirations report to W illiston

H IST O R IC R U T L A N D TO U R : See

Grandstand, Champlain Valley

and liquids on a five-mile hike up Mt.

7 p.m. Free. Info, 8 64-6703.

Central School, 9 a.m. Free. Info,

August 27.

Fairgrounds, Essex Junction, 7 p.m.

Ascutney via the W indsor Trail. Meet

8 79-5850, ext. 5716.

C H AM PLAIN VALLEY FAIR: The

$10. Info, 863-5966.

in the rear parking lot, Montpelier

drama

states largest agricultural fair serves up

CH AM BER M U SIC CONCERT:

High School, 9 a.m. Free. Info,

A U D IT IO N S : See August 27. ‘A N N IE ’ A U D IT IO N S: See August

dance

rides, games, exhibits, entertainment

Marguerite Schenkman, Robert Penny

229-0918.

C O N T R A D A NCE: Mary Des

and the best in fair food. See “to do”

and Cynthia Huard combine musical

M O U N T A IN BIKE RACE: Serious

29. Aspiring orphans dance and read at

Rosiers calls for Atlantic Crossing at

list, this issue. Champlain Valley

forces in an all-Beethoven program at

cyclists take to the trails in the “Battle

6:45 p.m. Adults brush up on their

this northern-style com m unity hoe-

Exposition, Essex Junction, 9 a.m. -

the Rochester Federated Church, 3:30

in the Backwoods.” Spectators are wel

singing, dancing and acting skills from

down. Capitol City Grange Hall,

midnight. $6. Info, 878-5545.

p.m. Donations. Info, 767-3012.

come in Hinesburg, 8 a.m. $25. Info.

7 to 10 p.m.

Montpelier, 8 p.m. $6. Info,

‘A TASTE OF STO W E’: The gold

426-3734.

town version o f the Green Mountain

film

Chew Chew puts local food — and art — on the menu. Jackson Arena, 10

‘A STRAN G ER IN T H E K IN G

a.m. - 4 p.m. $3.50. Info, 253-8358.

D O M ’: See August 28. Vergennes

482-5665.

‘BIG N IG H T , LITTLE M U R D E R ’:

‘T H E PE N N Y OPERA’: A “de-valued

etc

You get mystery with your meal at a

approximation” o f the musical by

A TASTE OF STO W E’: See August

Olde England Inne, Stowe, 6 p.m.

Bertolt Brecht and Kurt Weil gives

29.

$38. Info, 253-7558.

FLOWER DAYS FESTIVAL: It’s

voice to over-life-size cardboard cut

CH AM PLAIN VALLEY FAIR: See

‘M U R D E R AL D E N T E ’: Death is a

Opera H ouse, 7:30 p.m. $6. Info,

never too late to smell the roses. Check

out representations o f Mack the Knife,

August 29, $7.

Cabaret mixes murder and mostaccioli

877-6737.

out horticultural demos, garden tours

Pirate Jenny and other cynical person

FLOWER DAYS FESTIVAL: See

at Villa Tragara, Waterbury Center,

‘C ID ER H O U S E ’ A U D IT IO N S:

and a plant auction at the state’s largest

ages. Bread & Puppet Theater, Glover,

August 29.

6:15 p.m. $38. Info, 244-5288.

Miramax is seeking six and seven-year-

display o f flowers. See “to do” list, this

8 p.m. Donations. Info, 525-3031.

ROYAL LIPIZZAN STALLIONS: See

old boys to play orphans in the

issue. Basin Harbor Club, Vergennes,

‘SILENT CAL’: In his one-man show,

August 27, 2:30 p.m.

sport

Hollywood production o f Cider House

10 a.m. - 4 p.m. $3 to park. Info,

presidential impersonator Jim Cooke

A U D U B O N A U C T IO N : Bid on

O PE N FENCING : Amateur fencers

drama

dinner theater production hosted by Ye

Rules— the film adaptation o f the

475-2311.

offers “more than two words” about

antiques, sporting goods and garden

make their point for fitness. Bridge

novel by John Irving. Com e with a

A U G U ST FEST: Shop for art,

Calvin Coolidge. Randolph Center

equipment to raise money for nature

School, Middlebury, 7:30-9 p.m. $3.

photo to Ramada Inn and Conference

antiques, cheese and baked goods

Congregational Church, 7 p.m. Free.

programs at the Green Mountain

Info, 878-2902.

Center, S. Burlington, 10 a.m. - 3 p.m.

betwebn historic “house tours” at this

Info, 728-5398.

Audubon Center, Huntington, 11:30

M O U N T A IN BIKE RACING:

Free. Info, 6 5 8-0250.

fundraiser for the Montgomery

PETER BURNS: The quirky perfor

a.m. Free. Info, 434-3068.

Com petitive cyclists wend their ways

art

Historical Society. Pratt Hall,

mance artist stretches his notion o f

H ISTO RIC CRUISE: Get a floating

along maple trails in weekly races

M ontgomery Center, 10 a.m. - 3 p.m.

“Big Water” to include stories o f Lake

history lesson with your picnic dinner

throughout the summer. Palmers

FINE ART FLEA MARKET: The

Free. Info, 326-4404.

Champlain history. Doll-Anstadt

on a cruise organized by the Lake

Sugarhouse, Shelburne, 5 p.m. Info,

visual version o f the “farmer’s market”

FARMERS MARKETS: Look for

Gallery, 91 College St., Burlington, 1-

Champlain Maritime Museum.

985-5054.

offers affordable art in a wide range o f

Vermont-grown agricultural products

3 p.m. Free: Info, 864-3661.

Leaving from Basin Harbor Club,

mediums. Alley between Burlington

and crafts on the green at Burlington

VARIETY S H O W D IN N E R

Vergennes, 6-8 p.m. $10. Info,

City Hall Park, 8:30 a.m. - 2:30 p.m.

CRUISE: Looking for dinner and

etc

City Hall and the Firehouse Gallery,

475-2022.

CH A M PLA IN VALLEY FAIR: See

Info, 453-2435. Or in Montpelier,

diversion? This floating vaudevillean

FARMERS MARKET: It’s harvest

August 29, $2.

Corner o f Elm and State Streets, 9

variety show puts Larry, Darryl and

words

time. Buying fresh local produce,

C O N G O TALK: Confused about

a.m. - 1 p.m. Info, 426-3800. Or in

Darryl at the helm. Spirit o f Ethan

chickens and home-baked goods sup

Kabila? An active member o f the main

M ANIFEST POETRY CELEBRA

Waitsfield, Mad River Green, Rt. 100,

Allen, Burlington Boathouse, 6:30

ports farmers in Vermont. Town

opposition movement talks about the

T IO N : This end-of-summer showcase

9:30 a.m. - 1:30 p.m. Info, 496-5856.

p.m. $34.95. Info, 862-8300.

Com m on, Westford, 11:30 a.m. - 3

current political situation in the

noon - 4 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7166.

o f art, poetry and dance features a new

p.m. Free. Info, 878-5639.

kids

work by David Budbill performed with Andy D oe. Freeman Residence, Route

FRANKLIN C O U N T Y KIDS DAY:

12A, Northfield, 3:30-6 p.m. Free.

Bubbles, Playdoh, crafts and a dunking

Info, 4 85-1121.

booth keep kids entertained in Taylor

music

kids

Democratic Republic o f Congo. See “to do” list, this issue. Horn o f the M oon Cafe, Montpelier, 6-8 p.m. Free. Info, 2 23-6840. BATTERED W O M E N ’S SU PP O R T

Park, St. Albans, 3-7 p.m. Free. Info,

G RO UPS: W om en Helping Battered

524-2444.

C H IL D R E N ’S DAY: Contemporary

B.B. KING BLUES FESTIVAL: B.B.

kids get a taste o f life — and ice cream

King mixes it up with Dr. John,

sport

music

W omen facilitates a group in

BACKSTREET BOYS: Expect well-

6 58-1996. Also, the Shelter

— before television. Chores are part o f

Storyville and T he Neville Brothers at

A D IR O N D A C K HIKE: The

crafted harmonies — and the occasion

Com m ittee facilitates a m eeting in

the fun at the Billings Farm &

M ount Ellen, Sugarbush North,

Burlington chapter o f the Green

al urban pop hook — from this all

Burlington, 6:30-8 p.m. Free. Info,

continued on next page

$f)at ON THE KING STREET FERRY DOCK

Thursday

4 'u .S a t flig h t 4 :3 0 -8 :3 0

Acoustic Jalapeho Brothers

UNWIND ON THE WATERFRONT!

(acoustic rock)

W ednesday, August 26

MiduteeJi fen&cdz with ^ bead

Pawot <Mea& Panty Friday, Aug 28

h ) ce Burrell Saturday

Tfie W arreh s (funk/rock)

A k a isi fenxUUeAA, Buy Me A Pint Saturday August 29

^U e

N a t u fU A s L i

M vti-M i& tolt'ieiv fyedt unlit

$1.00 Molson Canadian Pints

TH $3.50 20oz. Black & Tans

2 6,

SA $2.00 Bud, Bud Light, Molson, Honey Brown

WEDTHUR-

Extreme Karaoke N ight Free W ings

Sunday - Thursday

$1 Bud & Bud Lights

Beetfeju/ce

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W ings, $50 cash prize

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1998

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W $2.50 VT. Microbrews

Friday T t a B*5 B^ys witfi

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page

W RITERS’ GRO UP: Writers work

QUILTING PROGRAM: Soloma

and crew. Saratoga Performing Arts

wom en than men. Join fellow sufferers

with words at Dubie’s Cafe,

Furlong talks about “growing up

Center, Saratoga Springs, 8 p.m. $20-

in the Board Room , Fanny Allen

T E E N HEALTH CLINIC: Teens get

Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info,

Amish” at a gathering o f enterprising

55. Info, 518-587-3330.

Campus, Colchester, 6:30-8:30 p.m.

information, supplies, screening and

865-9257.

hand crafters. Essex Alliance Church, 7

Montpelier, 5:30-7 p.m. Free. Info, 2 23-0855.

....

treatment for sexually related prob

Free. Info, 862-3273.

p.m. Free. Info, 863-2160.

art FIGURE DRAW ING: See August 26.

Calendar is written by Lucy Howe and

lems. Planned Parenthood, Burlington,

kids

O L D N O R T H E N D FARMERS

3:30-6 p.m. Pregnancy testing is free.

PARENTING G RO UP: Moms and

MARKET: Shop for local organic pro

Info, 863-6326.

dads compare notes on “parenting the

duce and fresh baked goods on the tri

kids

RUM M A G E SALE: Look for deals on

preschooler.” Bring your lunch to

angle in front o f the H .O . Wheeler

PARENTS A N O N Y M O U S: See

clothes, household items and toys at a

Family Connection Center, 23 George

School, Burlington, 3:30-6:30 p.m.

August 26.

weekly yard sale. Ohavi Zedek

St., Burlington, noon. Free. Info,

Free. Info, 863-6248.

PARENTING GRO UP: See August

Synagogue, North Prospect St.,

859-0934.

FREE LEGAL CLINIC: Attorney

26.

Burlington, 10 a.m. - 1 p.m. Free.

‘M U S IC W IT H ROBERT RESNIIC:

Sandy Baird offers free legal advice to

H O M ESC H O O LE R S STORYTIME:

Info, 8 6 2-2311.

Kids sing songs with the musical host

women with questions about family

Stay-at-home students hear animal

E M O T IO N S A N O N Y M O U S : People

o f VPR’s “All the Traditions.” Fletcher

law, housing difficulties and welfare

tales at the Fletcher Library,

with em otional problems meet at the

Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free.

problems. Room 14, Burlington City

Burlington, 1:30-2:30 p.m. Free. Info,

O ’Brien Center, S. Burlington, 7:30

Hall, 3-5 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7200.

865-7216.

p.m. Donations. Info, 6 60-9036.

STORY TIM E: Kids under three lis

BATTERED W O M E N ’S SU PPO R T

STORIES: Children listen, snack and

ten in at the S. Burlington Library, 10

GROUP: Meet in Barre, 10:30 a.m. -

make crafts at the Childrens Pages,

a.m. Free. Info, 652-7080.

noon. Free. Info, 223-0855.

W inooski, 10 a.m. Free. Info,

music VO CAL A U D IT IO N S : Musica

submissions are

Wednesday

activities. M ilton Public Library, 10:30

sport

before publication.

a.m. & 1 p.m. Free. Info, 893-4644.

V E R M O N T EXPOS: See September

SEVEN DAYS edits

sport

prior choral experience to join an ensemble devoted to music from a

sluggers take on the Oneonta Yankees

‘CRAZY FOR Y O U ’: See August 26.

variety o f traditions. U V M Recital

in Centennial Field, Burlington, 7

‘A N N IE ’ A U D ITIO N S: See

etc

Hall, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info,

p.m. $3. Info, 655-4200.

September 1.

CH AM PLAIN VALLEY FAIR: See

6 56-7770.

X -C R U N N IN G RACES: Cross

‘GREATER T U N A ’: “Our Town” it’s

August 29. Catch a real-live rodeo in

country runners take to the woods

not. Two actors portray 20 eccentric

the Grandstand at 7 p.m. $8.

M O U N T A IN BIKE RACES: See

drama

style. Send to:

every Tuesday evening at the Outdoor

characters — all inhabits o f Tuna,

BATTERED W O M E N ’S SU PP O R T

Experience at Catamount, Williston, 6

Texas — in this comic send-up of

G ROUPS: See August 26.

small town life. Montpelier City Hall

K N IT T IN G GROUP: Needle work ers swap techniques and design ideas

their singing and dancing skills in

etc

Arts Center, 8 p.m. 1:30 & 8 p.m. $912.50. Info, 253-0195.

with other wool workers. Northeast

preparatory workshops before the try

H IST O R IC R U T L A N D TO UR: See

outs. W illiston Central School, 7-10

August 27.

dance

a.m. Free. Info, 865-4981.

p.m. Free. Info, 879 -5 8 5 0, ext. 5716.

C H AM PLAIN VALLEY FAIR: See

‘RTVERDANCE’: Irish step dancing

FIBROMYALGIA SU PPO R T

August 29. The free Chevy Thunder

meets American disco in this show o f

GROUP: This neuromuscular pain

Show revs up at 7 p.m.

fancy footwork from Michael Flatley

and fatigue syndrome affects more

words

Let

' ' - . i - /» • *v r .

Theresa Bacon, MSW

on October 23 with piano

ie c e s

b y e

Laliberte ^ & Friends

in the concert

French & German Cabaret Sounds Next Appearance:

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C k o w l'& e lU &

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Creative, seasonal food • Fabulous Dessert Fine Wine, Beer & Liquors • Coffee & Espresso

Main Street Downtown

C all the Vermont Symphony Orchestra at 802-664-5741 ext. 12 for concert information and tickets. 28

fax 8 0 2 - 8 6 5 - 1 0 1 5 . Email:

sevenday@ together.net

VERM O N T

minhPOWER-ClaSSeS

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Women s Groups

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ISN’T IT TIM E YOU OPEN ED ANOTHER DOOR TO T H E FU T U R E?

Twist!

sa y.

SEVEN DAYS,

Fiber Arts Center, S. Burlington, 10

Classical Music with a

„

for space and

August 26.

p.m. $3. Info, 879-6001.

‘A N N IE ’ A U D IT IO N S : Yo Daddy Warbucks? Adult actors brush up on

due in writing on the Thursday

V E R M O N T EXPOS: T he hometown

A U D IT IO N S: See August 27.

compiled by Pamela Polston. All

Femina is seeking female vocalists with

drama

and art listings are

655-1537.

STORY H O U R : Kids between three and five engage in artful educational

Paula Routly. Clubs

SEVEN DAYS

Planned Parenthood of Northern New England ®

1-800-230-PLAN Insurance/Medicaid Welcome august

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1998

Teaching

a class?

Your listing here for $7 a week.

aikido AIKIDO: Adults: Mondays - Fridays, 5:45-6:45 p.m. and 7-8:15 p.m.; Saturdays, 9-11:45 a.m. Children: Tuesdays & Thursdays, 3:45-4:45 p.m. Aikido of Champlain Valley, 17 E. Allen St., Winooski. $40 per month intro special Info, 654-6999. Study

TAPESTRY WEAVING: Saturday, September^ (beginner), 9 a.m. - 4 p.m. Sunday, September 20 (advanced), 9 a.m. -1 p.m. Northeast Fiber Arts, 3062 Williston Rd., S. Burlington. $75, $45 ($110 for both). Learn the fundam ental techniques to “p a in t”

COMMUNITY PHOTOGRAPHY SERIES: Saturdays, 10 a.m. - noon. Vermont Studio Center, Johnson. Free. Info, 635-2727.

w ith ya m , then explore advanced techniques to create one-of-a-kind

Seymour Weinstock teaches photographers o f a ll a bility levels.

tapestries.

this graceful, flaw in g m a rtia l a rt a n d develop flexibility, confidence

pottery

a n d self-defense skills.

creative process

blacksmithing

‘THE CREATIVE SPIRIT AND HER SHADOWS’. Wednesdays, 9-11:30 a.m. Charlotte. $25 per week. Info, 4255433. Theresa Bacon leads a 12-week support group fo r women

TOOLMAKING: Monday and Friday, September 7 and 11, 8:30 a.m. - 5 p.m. Lake Champlain Maritime Museum, Vergennes. $450. Register, 475-2022. Learn th e fabrication a n d tem pering o f

working through blocks to their creative process. N ew group form ing.

iron tools from a m aster blacksmith, a n d go home w ith a to o lyou

BALLROOM AND LATIN DANCING: Ongoing weekday

INTRO TO BLACKSMITHING: Saturday and Sunday, September 12 and 13, 8:30 a.m. - 5 p.m. Lake Champlain Maritime Museum, Vergennes. $150. Info, 475-2022. Learn the

singles or couples, all ages. Various locations. Info, 862-2207. Learn to w altz, sw in g cha cha, tango and rum ba w ith your partner.

design/build business LOW-COST, EFFECTIVE ADVERTISING: Thursdays, September 10,17 and 24, 6-9 p.m. Burlington. $75 (grants avail able). Info,-------846-7160. c— // — 4n— ■■—- i/rc~ — ----- ------------- 7. ■ TL*^/»*^* rvrrt+rrt

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le). dness, in the Women's Sm all

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tu ral principles an d energy conservation.

writing

____

tion alfeltm akin g fo r f l it hats, slippers, m ittens a n d more.

read a n d discuss a t this ongoing workshop.

OLD-STYLE POETRY RECITATION: Monday, August 24,79p.m. Ilsely Public Library, Middlebury. Free. Info, 388-4095. H elp revive the tradition o f poetry recitation - bring your favorite classic poem to read.

problem s fin d a pads to relief

yoga

meditation

classes for all levels. Info, 482-3191.

MEDITATION: Thursdays, 7-8:30 p.m. Green Mountain Learning Center, 13 Dorset Lane, Suite 203, Williston. Free. Info, 872-3797. Don'tju st do something, s it there! MEDITATION: First & third Sundays, 10 a.m. - noon. Burlington Shambhaia Center Free. Info, 658-6795 Instructors teach non-sectarian an d Tibetan Buddhist practices.

Need a New Route to the Internet? Call us, we’ll get you connected and point you in the right direction. local access numbers • friendly helpdesk

POETRY WORKSHOP: Thursdays, 1 p.m. IJsley Public Library, Middlebury. Free. Info, 388-7523. B ring a poem or tw o

sound a n d movement.

taekwondo

Learn how to design you r dream home, explore site planning, struc

$39-349. Info, 860-4057, on. 20. IM rckucsm ‘THE WAY OF THE SUFI’:Tuesdays, 7:30-9 p.m. S. !/ ie■r \ m Ss» \ . v.i \ Burlington. Free. Info, 658-2447. Sufi-style m editation uses breath,

INTRODUCTION TO FELTING: Thursday, September 10, 6:30-9:30 p.m. Northeast Fiber Am Center, 3062 Williston Rd., S. Burlington. $15. Info, 865-4981, Learn a ll the basics o f tra d i

technique, n ot size, strength or speed.

OLYMPIC TAEKWONDO: Ongoing Mondays and Thursdays. Mater Christ! School, 51 Mansfield Ave., Burlington. $40/month. Info, 660-8942. Increase your fitn ess a n d flex ib ility

AWARENESS THROUGH MOVEMENT®: Wednesdays, starting September 9,11 a.m. -12 p.m., Mondays, starting September 14, 7-8 p.m. Waterfront Holistic Healing Center, 3 Main Street, Burlington. $45/6-week session, $9/dass. Fridays,, starting date TBA., 10:30 - 11:45 a.m. Twin Oaks, Kennedy Drive, S. Burlington. Price T.BA Info, 865-2756 ext. 6.

self-defense

HOME DESIGN:Sunday through Saturday, September 13-19. Yestermorrow Design/Build School, Warren. Info, 496-5545.

felden krais®

sents practical instruction in creating an effective message fo r your

POTTERY CLASSES: Ongoing day, evening and weekend class es. Vermont Clay Studio, Rt. 100, Waterbury Center. Info, 2241126. Enjoy the pleasures an d challenges o f working w ith clay.

BRAZILIAN JIU-JITSU: Ongoing classes for men, women and children, Monday through Saturday. Vermont Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Academy, 4 Howard St., Burlington. Info, 660-4072 or 2539730. Escape fear w ith an integrated self-defense system based oh

dance

make.

photography

G et p riva te instruction or take

classes in therapeutic yoga, vigorous yoga, yoga fo r pregnancy, or yoga fo r health a n d well-being.

BURLINGTON YOGA' Mondays and Wednesdays, 5:15 p.m., Tuesdays, 6:30 p.m., Saturdays, 9:30 a.m. Cali for locations. Info, 658-3013. Beginners, Interm ediates a n d individuals ivith special needs practice Iyengar-style yoga.

YOGA VERMONT: Fridays, 7-9:30 p.m., Saturdays, 9:30-11:30 a.m. and 1-4 p.m., Sundays, 10 a.m. - 12:30 p.m. Chace Mill, Burlington. Info, 660-9718. Tias L ittle shares his training in Eastern philosophy Sanskrit an d anatom y during this yoga intensive.

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V august

26.

1998

SEVEN DAYS

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SEVEN DAYS

august

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1998

PITCHER PERFECT By

M a r ia lis a

Sunday brunch and dinner, is

C a lta

ext time you have a special occasion to celebrate — a birthday, perhaps, or your in-laws are in town — get thee to the Pitcher Inn. A pic turesque establishment in the midst o f Warren Village, The Pitcher Inn practically screams “special occasion.” Its light and airy, spiffily done up, and has one o f those “local, seasonal” menus that we’ve all come to expect from a high-end estab lishment in Vermont. Moreover, it’s not stuffy the way many inns are, and the dining room lends itself, by some trick o f design and light ing, to lively, easy, private conversa tion. T he inn itself has a story. T he original buildings, built in the late 1880s, burned to the ground in May 1993 due to an electrical fire, according to Heather Carino, who manages the Inn with her husband John. Her parents, W in and Maggie Smith, bought the land shortly thereafter, and rebuilt the current inn on the old buildings’ footprints. “They’d been coming to Warren for years and years to ski,” says Carino o f her parents’ decision to become innkeepers. “They just wanted to give something back to the com m u• » nity. T he newly rebuilt Inn, which opened last December, has eight rooms — a ninth will soon open — each designed by a local architect around a theme, such as “The Schoolroom,” “The Trout Room” and “The M ountain Room .” Staying over will set you back $200 to $425 a night, including breakfast. T he dining room, open to the public for breakfast,

well worth a drive. It’s spacious and well-lit, with custom-made wall sconces, indirect ceiling lights and candles on each table. Maple and cherry floors are liberally sprinkled with antique rugs. The tables are set with heavy white-on-white linens; the custom-built Windsor-style chairs are as beautiful as they are com fort able. Potted plants add a touch o f soothing green. The overall effect is both intimate and expansive — it looks like a place where nice things would happen. And they do. I went to the Inn with my husband and a cousin from Lyon, France — a region which has spawned some seri ous cooks. We sat down to appetizers of chilled pea soup ($5), crab cakes ($7), and a salad o f haricots verts with walnuts, dried cherries and Maytag blue cheese ($7). The crab cakes, served with a nice aioli, were the winners; my cousin found her soup a bit too heavy on the creme fraiche, and my hus band’s plate had too many fla vors screaming for attention. The blue cheese won. O ur other choices included oven-roasted mussels with pancetta ($7), house smoked salmon ($7.50), cream o f roast ed garlic soup ($5.50), a fresh tom ato salad ($7.50) and a field green salad with herbs ($5.50). We segued nicely into the entries, though we had diffi culties making up our minds: O n the menu that night was grilled yellowfin tuna Nicoise ($20), a roasted rack o f lamb with Japanese eggplant and couscous ($24), pan-roasted chicken with a honey-balsamic sauce ($19), and grilled Black Angus beef with a grain-mus tard barbecue sauce ($23).

Pitcher Inn Warren

My husband chose a “Napoleon” o f sea bass, egg plant and tomato ($20); my cousin picked salmon en papillote with ginger, peaches and herbs ($20). And I — already filled up on crab cakes — had the “cafe” portion o f duck breast with blueberry, citrus and vodka sauce ($16 for the small portion, $21 for the large). The duck was one of three entrees — the others were the tuna and a risotto with peas — offered in smaller, or cafe, portions, which I think is a great idea, especially if you want to indulge in several courses. We ate in relative silence, partially because our high school French had pretty much given out, and partly because the plates were holding our interest. My husband’s “Napoleon” was definitely the oddest thing on the table — one o f those architectural won ders that used to grace the menus o f all trendy restaurants. But it was tasty and cooked with care. My cousin never actually shared a bite o f her salmon, but I noticed that it disap peared. “W hen I go home now, I can tell people that American food is not only M cDonald’s,”

she said. My duck was the best, though, and I tend to stay away from duck because I’ve been served such lousy preparations. This duck tasted like, well, duck — not some sickeningly sweet sauce. It was per fectly cooked, and absolutely delicious. All the plates were nicely presented, with good-sized por tions o f vegetables and rice or potatoes. T he waiter was per sonable yet not intrusive, and the service was perfectly paced. A nother bonus, aside from the option o f smaller portions, is the wine list, which is varied and nicely priced. I was told later that the inn marks up its wines only about 45-percent, as opposed to the 100 to 200 percent markup employed by many establishments. I was pleased to find nearly a dozen wines by the glass priced at about $5 — a rarity these days — and was even more pleased when the waiter offered me a taste before pouring. We managed to eye the dessert menu; a dark chocolate creme brulee ($5) caught our attention and, upon first taste, intense appreciation. O ther choices included a fruit sorbet with berries ($5), a lemon pop

pyseed shortcake with straw berries and whipped creme fraiche ($4.75), and a local cheese plate with fresh fruit ($5.75). T he man behind the menu is the estimable Tom Bivins, a 1991 New England Culinary grad who made his reputation locally as the chef at the Inn at Shelburne Farms. After work ing at Shelburne Farms for eight years, Bivins said, he was “in the market for something new.” According to Carino, he hit it off with the management instantly. Given free rein at The Pitcher Inn, Bivins said his aim was to keep the food “fresh, seasonal, local and accessible,” and to prepare low-key food that does not “try to compete with the architecture.” If you want an over-the-top experience, rent a room in the wine cellar for a private party ($75 per person, excluding the cost o f the meal). Bivins noted that at least one marriage pro posal has taken place there. T he Pitcher Inn is friendly and appealing, yet elegant, with a m enu that delights and service that surprises with its professionalism. You m ight think about going even if your in-laws aren’t in town. ®

The Pitcher Inn, Main Street, W arren Village, VT 05674 (802)496-6350; open daily except Tuesdays, 8-11 a.m. for b reakfast, 6-9-30 p.m. for dinner, and Sunday brunch, 9 a.m. - 1 p.m. Visa and M astercard accepted, handicapped accessib le. R eservatio n s advised.

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ts almost the end o f the summer, and you’ve had fun outdoors in just about every way possible: biking, skating, hiking, sailing, wind surfing, kayaking. But if you’re an aquatic adrenaline junkie and you haven’t tried wake boarding, add it to the list — there’s still a little time. Wakeboarding is sum m er’s equivalent to snowboarding — same stance, same air time, same array o f gymnastic tricks, if you’re so inclined. A special ly designed board is pulled behind a boat, much like in

flUTDOjORS caught on, and the latter seemed to be for those Eddiethe-Eagle types who couldn’t decide whether their ancestry was more fish or fowl. Wakeboarding opens up new horizons in aquatic fun. W hile sport magazines portray the big air time and convolut ed tricks o f the pros, just cruising back and forth across the wake is a much different feeling than having either one or two skis on. Lots o f water-skiers are switching to wakeboarding,

Tired o f water wedgies? Now there's another way to waterski. water skiing. But there the similarity ends. The thrill o f water skiing comes with learning to ski slalom-style on one ski — not an easy proposition. Cutting around buoys at increasingly faster speeds, chained to the layout o f the straight course — there you have it. There are trick skis and jum ping skis, but the former never really

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just like alpine skiers who try snowboarding and get instant ly hooked. And dedicated snowboarders are finding that it’s a great summer alternative. Wakeboarding is in a boom phase, and for good reason. Kere Baker, owner o f Just Sports in Colchester, confirms a steady increase in the sport locally — folks have been dri ving in from all over the state

Buy before Labor Day and SAVE on skiing and riding all season. S E A S O N PASS Ski or ride, all day, every day, all season with NO restrictions! BASH BADGE 1/2 price for all single day, half-day and multi-day lift tickets all season with NO restrictions! BASH B A D G E PLUS Same as Bash Badge PLUS 8 weeks of FREE skiing or riding from Opening Day to 12/18/98 and 3/8/99 to Closing Day!

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3 people 4 people

$1,049

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5 people

$1,169

$1,469

6 people

$1,289

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'W eekend rates will apply during holiday periods. Bash Badge & Bash Badge Plus holders will N EV ER pay more than $23 any day, all season long! "Im m ed iate family, maximum 2 adults. All prices subjectto 5% Vermont State Sales tax. All sales are final. There are no refunds. All rates are in US Funds and are subject to change without notice. Family Pass, Bash Badge & Bash Badge Plus cards are nonassignable, non-transferable and non-retundable.

FAMILY PASS Most families will save money over the cost of buying individual passes for each family member. Unrestricted family skiing and riding all season long PLUS one FREE weekend beginner or intermediate adult lesson every Saturday or Sunday, all season long, in alpine or cross-country skiing or snowboarding! Here’s a chance for Mom or Dad to enjoy Winter on the mountain with their family at a price that makes it easy! PLU S A LL PASS & BADGE H O LD ERS R E C E IV E T H E S E ADDITIONAL VA LU ABLE D ISCO U N TS: 50% OFF all single and multi-day equipment rentals 50% OFF all single and multi-day group lessons 50% OFF all cross-country trail fees (FREE w/ Season Pass) 20% OFF regular Sport Shop prices 20% OFF all children’s Ski & Snowboard camps $10 OFF full-day Nursery programs (minimum 24 hour advance reservations)

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DQ®M®m2 Valid for Sa tu rd a y s (1/9/99 - 3/27/99) from downtown B u rlin gto n to S m u g g le rs ’ Notch with sam e day return. S ig n up at the B SID E before F rid a y s at noon or ca ll for d e ta ils. page

SEVEN DAYS

august

26,

1998

t o c h e c k o u t t h e g e a r. W h a t ’s m o re , it seem s to b e a h it w ith a ll a g e s — r e c e n t c u s t o m e r s ra n g e f ro m se v e n to fifty s o m e th in g . W a k e b o a r d s a r e s iz e d a c c o rd in g to w e ig h t, a n d h a v e a s m a ll d e t a c h a b l e f in a t b o t h t h e t i p a n d ta il f o r d i r e c t i o n a l s ta b ility . T h e r i d e r is a t t a c h e d to th e b o a rd b y b in d in g s v e ry s i m i l a r t o th o s e f o u n d o n w a t e r s k is . T h e s e c a n b e s e t a t v a r io u s a n g le s , a l t h o u g h th e y a r e u s u a lly r o u g h l y p e r p e n d i c u la r. A s in s k a t e b o a r d i n g o r s n o w b o a rd in g , y o u m u s t k n o w , o r f i n d o u t , i f y o u ’re “r e g u la r ” ( le f t f o o t f o r w a r d ) , o r “g o o f y ” (rig h 't f o o t f o r w a r d ) . L ik e m o s t h i g h - t e c h to y s , t h e y ’re n o t c h e a p , w i t h a n e n t r y - le v e l s e t - u p r u n n i n g a b o u t $ 3 0 0 , a n d th e h o t o u t fits i n t h e $ 3 0 0 - 6 0 0 r a n g e . O n e th in g th a t m ak es w a k e b o a r d i n g m o r e a c c e s s ib le to m o r e p e o p l e is t h a t , u n l i k e w i t h w a t e r s k ii n g , a n y o l d b o a t w ill d o . C o m p e t i t i v e s la lo m w a t e r s k ie rs n e e d t o b e p u l l e d a t 3 4 - 3 6 m p h , a n d h ittin g th e w a te r a t th a t sp e e d o fte n m e a n s h e l l t o p ay . W a k e b o a rd e rs , o n th e o th e r h a n d , c r u is e a t 1 6 - 1 8 m p h , so

The whole thing didn't last more than 15 minutes, but it was the most fun I'd had with my trunks on all summer.

T h e

Treat

B o d y

y o u r self : skin care

d a d ’s f is h in g b o a t w ill p r o b a

n e s s .” B e c a u s e o f t h e b o a r d ’s V

a n d t h a t w a s 1 0 y e a rs o f s n o w

w i d t h , t h e r e w a s n ’t t h e lite r a l

s p e e d t h e r e ’s le ss o f a c r a s h -

b o a r d i n g e x p e r ie n c e : B u t I a ls o

s i n k i n g f e e lin g t h a t o c c u r s o n

a n d - b u r n e f f e c t i f y o u lo s e

h a d o n e m a j o r d is a d v a n t a g e ,

w a t e r sk is w h e n y o u g e t o u t

y o u r b a la n c e .

w h ic h w as a n a p p a r e n tly

s id e t h e w a k e a n d s lo w d o w n

g e n e tic d is p o s itio n to w a rd

to o m u c h c o m in g o u t o f a

b e i n g a k lu tz .

t u r n . T h e b o a r d a ls o f e lt m u c h

L a s t w e e k e n d , I h a d th e o p p o r t u n i t y t o t e s t t h e w a te r s f o r m y s e lf. I m e t J o h n L e t tie r i,

T h e tim e fo r th in k in g w as

m o r e “p l a y f u l , ” i n te r m s o f

a sa le s re p f o r D o u b l e U p

o v e r w h e n I f e lt t h e r o p e t i g h t

b e i n g a b le to “s l i c e - a n d - d i c e ”

w a k e b o a r d s , o u t a t I r o q u o is

e n . I g a v e t h e t h u m b s - u p s ig

t h e “r id g e s ” a l o n g e i t h e r s id e

L a k e . I t w a s c o o l, c l o u d y a n d

n a l, a n d t h e b o a t s u r g e d f o r

o f th e w ak e .

r a in i n g , b u t w h e n y o u ’re g o in g

w a r d . L ik e m a g ic , I fe lt m y s e l f

to g e t w e t a n y w a y , w h o c a re s

ris e u p , a n d I w a s o ff.

a b o u t a fe w d r o p s f r o m a b o v e ? W e s h o o k so g g y h a n d s ,

O n e m o r e s h o r t r id e , a n d m y l e s s - t h a n - s t e l l a r m u s c le

B e c a u s e o f t h e s id e w a y s

t o n e d i c t a t e d t h a t I w a s to a s t.

s ta n c e , t h e t u r n s in w a k e

T h e w h o l e t h i n g d i d n ’t la s t

s u i t e d u p in N e o p r e n e , a n d

b o a r d i n g a re d e s c r ib e d as

m o r e t h a n 15 m i n u t e s , b u t it

h e a d e d o u t in h is s le e k , s w ift

e i t h e r “to e s id e ” o r “ h e e l s i d e . ”

w a s t h e m o s t f u n I ’d h a d w ith

b o a t . I w a s a l it tle n e r v o u s ,

I h a d n o p ro b le m w ith m y

m y t r u n k s o n all s u m m e r .

h a u n t e d b y m y o l d w a t e r s k i

h e e l- s id e t u r n s , b u t c o u l d n ’t

i n g m e m o r ie s o f f o r g e t t i n g to

q u i t e f ig u r e o u t t h e b o d y l a n

O n c e h e g o t g o in g , h e

le t t h e r o p e g o in a tim e ly

g u a g e o n t h e t o e s id e . I n t h e

s m o o t h l y l a u n c h e d i n t o th e

f a s h io n . N o t t o m e n t i o n t h e

m id s t o f e x p e rim e n ta tio n , I

a ir, u s i n g t h e s id e o f t h e w a k e

ra re b u t u n p le a s a n t h y d ra u lic

w ent dow n.

as a l i q u i d r a m p . I ’m n o t h i p

w e d g ie .

T h e n i t w a s L e t t i e r i ’s t u r n .

t o t h e lin g o o f a ll t h e tr ic k s h e

L e t tie r i t h e n g a v e m e s o m e tip s , I p o p p e d b a c k u p , a n d

p e r f o r m e d , b u t s u f fic e it to sa y

m e n t a r y a d v ic e o n h o w to g e t

w as so o n c u ttin g b a c k a n d

th a t h e w as s p in n in g , g ra b

L e t tie r i o f f e r e d s o m e e le

u p a n d h o w t o t u r n . H e a ls o

f o r t h a c ro s s t h e w a k e . A s p o n

b in g , r o t a t i n g a n d w h o o p i n g it

e x p l a in e d h o w w a k e b o a r d i n g

ta n e o u s g r i n s p r e a d a c r o s s m y

u p . G iv e n th e d im in is h in g

is a “s p l i t - b o d y ” s p o r t , m u c h

fa c e . F e e lin g b o ld e r , I w e n t f o r

n u m b e r o f d a y s le f t f o r la k e

lik e s k a te - o r s n o w b o a r d i n g , as

a l i t t l e a i r as I c r o s s e d t h e

s p o rts , y o u m a y h a v e to w a it

o p p o s e d to s la lo m w a t e r s k i

w a k e . “ S p lo o s h ! ” — a n o t h e r

u n t i l n e x t y e a r t o e x p e r ie n c e

in g , w h i c h is a “w h o l e - b o d y ”

d iv e , b u t it w a s e a s y t o p u ll

th e th r ill o f w a k e b o a rd in g . I

s p o r t in te r m s o f le a n a n d fo l

back up.

l o w - t h r o u g h . A s I la y in t h e

k n o w I w o u l d n ’t t u r n d o w n a n o t h e r i n v i t a t i o n . E v e n i f i t ’s

W h a t I m o s t lik e d a b o u t

w a te r , I w o n d e r e d w h y I h a d

w a k e b o a r d in g w as th e c o m b i

n ’t a s k e d h i m to g o firs t.

n a t i o n o f s t a b i l i t y a n d “ lo o s e

S h o p .

•

I d i d h a v e o n e a d v a n ta g e ,

b ly d o t h e tr ic k , a n d a t t h a t

hair

•

It ’ s

bath

f o r

•

a l l

beauty

•

o f

y o

relaxation

r a in in g . ®

•

rejuvenation

N A T U R A L • NO A N I M A L T E S T I N G • C O M M U N I T Y G I V I N G OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK • 84 CHURCH STREET, BURLINGTON • 8 6 0 . 3 6 6 4

august

26,

1998

SEVEN DAYS

page

PHOTO:

The Montreal World Film Festival reels them in Bv

YOGA

about.

Come see what it’

BOX A23 CH A CE MILL • BURLINGTON VT 05401 • (802) 660-9718 • YVT@ TO GETH ER.N ET

h e n i s i t

W o r l d F ilm F e s tiv a l? I t

c o m p e l l e d b y f a m ily p r o b

is s o g o o d t h a t f o r t h e

le m s to g o h o m e to h is

K e lle r

o f a c to r J o h n S h e a

Astanga Yoga is a challenging and bring the body, mind and spirit The practice is sweaty, progressive and fun. Breath control (ujayi), isometrics (bandhas), focused gazing (dristi), and traditional yoga postures (asanas) are melded together to enhance self-control and self-aw areness.

o w g o o d is t h e M o n t r e a l

Southie, t h e d i r e c t o r i a l d e b u t ( Windy City) a b o u t a y o u n g m a n

Jeanne

I n

e r m

n o t h e r

o n t ,

r l d

p a s t f o u r y e a r s w e ’v e s p e n t

to u g h S o u th B o s to n n e ig h

t h e la s t tw o w e e k e n d s o f t h e

b o r h o o d a f te r v o w in g n e v e r

s u m m e r i n d o o r s . L a s t y e a r,

to r e tu r n .

h a v in g b e e n in tr a in in g fo r t h e th r e e p r i o r fe s tiv a ls , w e

A r g e n t i n a s e n d s The Lighthouse (El Faro), t h e

w e r e a b l e t o s e e 1 0 f ilm s in

s t o r y o f tw o s is te r s , o r p h a n e d

o n e th r e e -d a y w e e k e n d .

b y a c a r c ra sh , w h o g ro w u p

W h y w o u ld m y h u s b a n d ,

te n a c i o u s , d e t e r m i n e d a n d

in v e te ra te s h o rt-s e a s o n g a r

p r o n e to u n r e q u i t e d lo v e

d e n e r , s u b m i t t o tw o w e e k s

a f f a ir s ,” is f ie r c e ly lo y a l to

o f d a rk e n e d ro o m s r e d o le n t

A n e t a , h e r y o u n g e r s is te r.

o f p o p c o r n a n d s ta le

T h e f ilm c h r o n i c l e s t h e i r 1 0 -

G ita n e s - b r e a th ? F o r a s ta rt,

y e a r s e a r c h f o r a p la c e in t h e

t o s e e a M o n g o l i a n f ilm

w o rld .

a b o u t a h o rs e -w h is p e rin g g r a n d f a t h e r b o n d i n g w i t h h is

T h e I t a l i a n f ilm , Elvis & Marilyn, te lls t h e s t o r y o f

g r a n d s o n as th e y p r e p a re fo r

tw o y o u n g p e o p le , h e fro m

t h e e p i c a n n u a l h o r s e ra c e

B u l g a r ia a n d s h e f r o m

a c ro s s t h e s te p p e s . T o s e e a n

B u c h a re s t, w h o m e e t a t a n

I r a n i a n f ilm a b o u t t h e l e g e n d

E lv is P re s le y a n d M a r i l y n

o f t h e s p i r i t t h a t liv e s in

M o n r o e lo o k - a l i k e c o n t e s t ,

G a b b e h ru g s, w o v en b y

a n d w i n a p r iz e t o a t o u r i s t

n o m a d ic s h e p h e rd s . T o see a

r e s o r t o n t h e A d r i a t i c , a ll o f

C o lo m b ia n c o m e d y a b o u t an

t h i s o r c h e s t r a t e d b y “a s h a d y

im p o v e r is h e d fa m ily w h o s e

Ita lia n im p r e s a r io .”

life is c h a n g e d b y t h e i r a p p e a ra n c e o n a p o p u la r

J u d t 5

m d e d f r o m

D o w n to w n

P e r e n n i a l 1 D U * G

r e e k * C

e c k

n i q u e &

la s s ic

D A

t m

a r d e n s

i n i n g

e r i c a n

F a v o r i t e s

L in c o ln

In n

a V e r m o n t e r , i t d o e s n ’t s e e m lik e a t o u g h c h o i c e .

p r o s e c u to r, a n d tr y o u t th e ir

t h a t i t ’s m o r e lu c r a t i v e t o

2 7 t o S e p t e m b e r 7 t h e f e s ti

c a r r y o u t t h e r o le o f c o r r u p t

v a l w ill s c r e e n 4 0 0 f ilm s

la w e n f o r c e m e n t o f fic e r s in

fro m 6 0 c o u n trie s . T h e

re a l life t h a n i t is t o p la y i t in

M o n t r e a l F e s tiv a l is r e c o g

t h e m o v ie s . T h e r e are a c o u p le o f

F e d e r a t i o n o f F ilm P r o d u c e r s

d o z e n m a j o r f ilm s i n t h e

A s s o c ia ti o n s , a n d c o m p e t e s

H o rs C o n c o u rs (o u t o f co m

w i t h T o r o n t o , N e w Y o rk a n d

p e titio n ) s e c tio n , in c lu d in g

o t h e r N o r t h A m e r i c a n c itie s

th r e e p r iz e -w in n e rs fro m

to h o s t im p o r ta n t p re m ie re s .

C a n n e s : t h e P a lm e d ’o r w i n

Eternity and a Day , f r o m

4 Park Street Essex Junction, VT 05452

I n a d d i t i o n , t h e r e a r e s e v e ra l

n er,

802-878-3309

fe s tiv a l c o m p e t i t i o n s , t r i b u t e s

G r e e c e ; J u r y G r a n d P riz e

a n d s p e c ia l f o c u s s e c ti o n s .

w in n e r,

74 p e r c e n t of o u r r e a d e r s s a y t h e y p a t r o n iz e

r e s t a u r a n t s a t le a s t s e v e r a l t im e s a m o n th s e v e n d a y s 34

r o le s w h i l e r e la x in g in a k a r a o k e b a r. T h e y d is c o v e r

e y e -o p e n in g . F ro m A u g u s t

T h e o f f ic ia l c o m p e t i t i o n

page

Extras — w h o f in a lly

title d

n iz e d b y t h e I n t e r n a t i o n a l

K O U R E B A N A S *

t h e ta le o f tw o f ilm e x t r a s — l a n d ro le s as d e t e c t i v e a n d

2 2 n d , p r o m i s e s t o b e j u s t as u is in e

F ro m S o u th K o re a c o m e s

t e le v i s io n p r o g r a m . E v e n f o r

T h i s y e a r ’s fe s tiv a l, t h e

o s p h e r e

e d i t e r r a n e a n m

B u r lin g to n

a l o n e . C a r m e l a , “e c c e n tr ic ,

a d i e - h a r d g o lfe r, a n d m e , a n

SEVEN DAYS

Life is Beautiful (La Vita e Bella), f r o m I ta ly ; a n d

i n c l u d e s 2 4 f e a t u r e f ilm s

t h e D a n i s h f ilm a w a r d e d t h e

f r o m 1 4 c o u n t r i e s , s e le c te d

J u r y P riz e ,

to c o m p e te fo r th e G ra n d

(Festen).

P r ix o f t h e A m e r ic a s . T h e U n i t e d S ta te s ’ e n t r y is

The Celebration

Y o u c a n a ls o p r e v ie w s o m e n e w U .S . f ilm s , i n c l u d -

august

26,

1998

....... ..........

.—

—

---------------------------- —

------------------------------------

V-‘. -V't

Why would my husband, a die-hard golfer, and me, an inveterate short-season gardener, submit to two weeks of darkened rooms redolent of popcorn and stale Gitanes-breath? in g P a u l S c h r a d e rs

Affliction ,

Overnight Trips to Montreal for as low as $43 per person

a n d a b o o k le t o f 10 c o u p o n s

u s e d f o r e a c h s c r e e n in g . W e

b a s e d o n t h e R u s s e ll B a n k s

f o r C A N $ 5 0 . T i c k e t s f o r a ll

s tr o n g ly r e c o m m e n d b u y in g

n o v el a n d s ta rrin g N ic k

s c re e n s a r e s o ld a t a ll v e n u e s .

all ti c k e t s f o r t h e d a y a t o n c e ,

N o l t e , S issy S p a c e k , J a m e s

C h e c k t h e F e s tiv a l’s W e b s ite

as t h e g o o d o n e s — o r th o s e

C o b u r n , W ille m D a fo e a n d

(w w w .f f m - m o n t r e a l .o r g ) f o r

o n s m a lle r s c re e n s — c a n sell

M a r y B e th H u r t . B u t t h a t

h e l p f u l in fo .

o u t early .

w ill c o m e to V e r m o n t a n y

Y o u c a n a lso p i c k u p a fe s

I f y o u ’re so i n c l i n e d , l o o k

w ay , r ig h t? I n s t e a d , w h y n o t

tiv a l s c h e d u le a t a n y o f t h e

f o r t h e d a i ly p r e s s c o n f e r

tr y s o m e th in g c o m p le te ly d if

v en u es. N o te , th o u g h , th a t

e n c e s , h e l d in t h e a t r i u m in

f e r e n t, lik e o n e o f t h e 1 0 n e w

tim e s a re g iv e n in 2 4 - h o u r , o r

C o m p l e x e - D e s j a r d i n s a c ro s s

m il ita r y , tim e . L o o k u p t h e

f r o m P la c e d e s A r t s , w h i c h

F ra n c o -G e rm a n -P o lis h c o

d a t e y o u ’re in M o n t r e a l , a n d

a ls o s e rv e s as F e s tiv a l

p ro d u c tio n a b o u t a m a n w h o

y o u ’ll f i n d all s c r e e n in g s f o r

H e a d q u a r t e r s . T h e s e a re o p e n

is re le a s e d f r o m p r i s o n a n d

t h a t d a y , lis te d b y v e n u e a n d

to t h e p u b l i c , a n d w h ile

s e n t to w o r k in a r u r a l

t h e n b y tim e . A ls o , i f t h e film

s o m e t i m e s c o m p l e t e l y in

R o m a n i a n o r p h a n a g e — “ h is

is n ’t f r o m t h e U .S . o r G r e a t

F r e n c h , t h e y u s u a lly h a v e

la s t c h a n c e a t r e d e m p t i o n . ”

B r ita in , m a k e s u r e y o u se e

tra n s la tio n . C o m in g u p o n

“s . t . a . ” in t h e film lis tin g .

G e r a r d D e p a r d i e u ’s p re s s c o n

film s f r o m F r a n c e , o r

Brute, a

H o w c a n H o lly w o o d c o m p e te w ith

Comedian

T h is m e a n s

Harmonists, s e t in B e rlin in

o r E n g lis h s u b ti tle s . I f y o u

1 9 2 7 , w h i c h te lls t h e s t o r y o f a n in te rn a tio n a lly re n o w n e d

sous-titre anglais,

cappella g r o u p w h o t h i n k

h ave a n y d o u b t, ask b efo re y o u b u y t h e tic k e t . T h e s c h e d u l e i n c lu d e s

f e r e n c e s e v e ra l y e a r s a g o w a s a m e m o ra b le m o m e n t. D o n ’t b e i n t i m i d a t e d b y

t h e m f r o m t h e N a z is ? O r th e

in c o m p e t i t i o n . F o r d e t a il s o n

t h e H u d s o n B a y s to r e , y o u

all o t h e r f ilm s y o u ’ll n e e d to

w ill h e a r e n d le s s p s y c h o - b a b

T h e o n e p r o b l e m w i t h th e

lik e to p le s s s ta r l e ts in f r o n t o f

c o n s u l t a fe s tiv a l c a ta lo g u e . I t

b l i n g c r it ic s a n d a n n o y i n g

fe s tiv a l is n a r r o w i n g y o u r

se lls f o r C A N $ 2 0 , b u t o n e

p s e u d o - c r i t i c s , a n d se e p l e n t y

c h o ic e s . B u t t h e g o o d n e w s is

c o p y is o f t e n a v a ila b le f o r

o f p e o p l e w a t c h i n g t h e film s

t h a t t h e s y s te m is p r e t t y u s e r-

b r ie f re fe re n c e a t tic k e t

w ith th e ir sh a d e s o n . Y ou m a y

frie n d ly . F irs t, t h e f ilm s a re

b o o t h s . (W e u s u a lly b u y a

e v e n b e g e n t l y p u s h e d a s id e

s h o w n w i t h i n e a s y w a lk i n g

c o p y so w e c a n k e e p a n e y e

b y a n e n t o u r a g e . I t ’s j u s t

d i s t a n c e o f e a c h o th e r . T h e

o u t f o r f ilm s w e m is s e d a t

a n o th e r g re a t M o n tre a l

f o u r v e n u e s f o r t h e f ilm s —

t h e a te r s o r v id e o s to r e s la te r

o p p o r t u n i t y to e n j o y a n d

I m p e r i a l C i n e m a , P la c e s d e s

o n .)

o b s e r v e life in a w o r l d - c la s s

A rts , L e P a r is ie n a n d

O n c e y o u ’v e p i c k e d a f ilm ,

5 Departures D aily for More Info call 864-6811

C a n n e s - s t y l e p u b l i c i t y p lo y s

d e s c r i p t i o n s o n l y o f t h e f ilm s

Genghis Khan ?

Same Day Round Trip to Montreal from Burlington $27.00

scene. W h i l e y o u w o n ’t see

t h e i r p o p u l a r i t y w ill i n s u l a te C h i n e s e sa g a ,

- includes bus fare & lodging C all 651-4739 for more info

My computer manual was written by aliens! □ V T h X (A S V N C I*

(Wecanhelp!)

Rent-a-Geek I -888-SOS-GEEK On-Site PC, Mac and Network Troubleshooting, Custom Tutoring

c ity . A n d d o n ’t b e a t all s h y

C o m p l e x e - D e j a r d i n s — a re

c irc le it a n d ta k e t h e s c h e d u le

a b o u t a s k in g F e s tiv a l a id e s f o r

all o n o r w i t h i n h a l f a b lo c k

w i t h y o u to t h e t i c k e t b o o t h ,

h e lp a n d d ire c tio n s ; th e y h av e

o f a f o u r - b l o c k s e c ti o n o f S te -

to e n s u re s m o o th c o m m u n i

a lw a y s b e e n k i n d a n d c o u r t e

C a t h e r i n e . S e c o n d , film p r i c

c a t i o n r e g a r d i n g w h i c h t ic k e t s

o u s to u s, w ith o r w ith o u t

i n g is e x t r e m e l y r e a s o n a b le :

y o u w a n t t o b u y . T h e d a i ly

sh ad es. ®

C A N $ 7 f o r i n d i v i d u a l f ilm s

lis t i n g i n c lu d e s a s p e c if ic c o d e

APRESLESFESTIVAL, LESCHEAPSEATS n

val of rare film s

for these

Parc). It’s an Interest

mg. quiet neighborhood, and includes the excellent Indian • W e w ill guarantee the low est price • Life-tim e w arranty • G em ologist - C>wner D ale D rinkw ater

"Your Diamond Center” • Vermont's #1 Jeweler 30 N o. M ain Street, St. Albans, V T 524-4055 or 1-800-287-4055 M onday-T hursday 9-5, Friday 9-8, Saturday 9-5

h o re ,c r e s a wonderful little country inn and restaurant overlooking lake champlain and the green mountains.

(802) 372-8722 north hero island, Vermont

august

26,

1998

SEVEN DAYS

page

SCHOOLSOFTHOUGHT

o f v a lu a b le id e a s t h a t c a n t r a n s f o r m s c h o o l i n g , ” sa y s P a u l

C o n tin u ed fro m page 2 2

S k iff. W h i l e c a lli n g a t t e n t i o n to

G u s t a f s o n , c o m m u n i t y lia is o n

p u b l i c s c h o o ls ’ h is t o r i c a l a n d

f o r t h e G a i l e r S c h o o l.

c o n t i n u i n g r o le as “ l a b o r a to r ie s

r e s p o n d s q u ic k ly a n d e ffe c tiv e ly

F r a n H u n t o o n , a 14 - y e a r

t o d is c ip li n e p r o b le m s . T h e

LISTINGS

o f d e m o c r a c y ,” D o r t a a ls o d o e s

p u b l i c m i d d l e s c h o o l a lso p r o

te a c h in g v e te ra n a t th e

n o t b e lie v e t h e p r i v a t e a l t e r n a

v id e s m o r e e x t r a c u r r i c u la r a c tiv -

S c h o o lh o u s e , p o i n t s to its c o n -

tiv e n e c e s s a r ily u n d e r m i n e s th e

"With 90 percent or more of American kids attending public schools, we should be focusing our energy and our resources on making those schools excel." - Angelo Dorta, Vermont NEA president

C A

L L

X O

T I S T S :

D U B IE ’S CAFE in Burlington wants to show artwork — 2D or 3D. Interested artists can leave a message at 658-0693, or stop by the cafe at the corner o f N orth Street and N orth W inooski Avenue after 5 p.m. O

RHOMBUS OPEN HOUSE, in which the public is invited for an itie s t h a n d o p r iv a t e s c h o o ls ,

f lic t-m e d ia tio n p r o g ra m a n d

f o u n d a t i o n s o f a n e g a lit a r ia n

M c C a r t h y n o te s .

r e lia n c e o n p a r e n t s as in - c la s s

s o c ie ty . H e p o i n t s , f o r in s t a n c e ,

informal meeting to “foster visionary vitality” for the gallery. Rhom bus Gallery, 186 College St., Burlington, 865-3144. August

te a c h e r s as s u c c e s s fu l i n it ia t iv e s

to “t h e l o n g a n d p r i z e d t r a d i

26, 8 p.m.

p r a is e f o r t h e S c h o o lh o u s e —

th a t c o u ld b e a d o p te d b y p u b lic

t i o n o f p r i v a t e e d u c a t i o n in th is

ANNUAL MEMBERS' EXHIBITION, featuring works in mixed

w h e r e h e r tw o y o u n g e r c h i ld r e n

s c h o o ls .

c o u n try .”

A l t h o u g h s h e v o ic e s o n l y

M c C a r t h y sa y s s h e w o u l d p r o b

D o r t a a g re e s t h a t p r iv a t e

s c h o o ls c l a im a n e q u a l r i g h t to

a b l y s till o p t f o r E d m u n d s f o r

s c h o o ls c a n p e r f o r m t h e f u n c

p u b lic fu n d s th a t th e y c o n s ti

h e r o l d e s t c h i ld , e v e n i f th e

t i o n o f d e v i s in g c r e a tiv e

tu te a th r e a t to d e m o c r a tic

media. Chaffee Center for the Visual Arts, Rutland, 775-0356. Reception August 28, 5-7 p.m. REFLECTIONS ON BASIN HARBOR, the 13th annual art exhibit o f w ork by 18 juried Vermont artists in a 10-day residence at the resort. Basin H arbor Club, Ferrisburgh, 475-2311. Reception

S c h o o l h o u s e o f f e r e d a s e v e n th -

a p p ro a c h e s th a t w o u ld b e n e f it

n o rm s , D o r ta m a in ta in s . T h e

August 28, 4-7 p.m.

p u b lic e d u c a tio n . U n f o r tu n

p u b l i c r e a lm is w h e r e t h e a c t i o n

V e rm o n t N E A p re s id e n t

a re c u r r e n tly e n ro lle d —

I t is o n l y w h e n p r iv a t e

a te ly , h e a d d s , “ I k n o w o f n o

is, h e a r g u e s , a n d w h e r e p u b l i c

HAROLD ARTHUR DRURY, featuring an exhibit of paintings. M illhouse-Bundy Gallery, Waitsfield, 496-5055. Reception August

t h a t o n e c a n p r o v id e a n e x t r a

s t r u c t u r e i n p la c e to e n s u r e t h a t

m o n e y s h o u l d r e m a in .

29 and 30, 3-7 p.m.

m e asu re o f n u rtu ra n c e a n d

s u c h a tr a n s f e r a c t u a l l y ta k e s

s e c u r i t y to y o u n g c h i l d r e n ,

p la c e .”

a n d e ig h th -g ra d e p ro g ra m . B u t a p r iv a t e s c h o o l lik e

E v e n as t h e y t r u m p e t t h e i r

M c C a r t h y a d d s . S h e a ls o v a lu e s

“In th e e n d , w ith 9 0 p e r c e n t o r m o r e o f A m e r i c a n k id s a t t e n d i n g p u b l i c s c h o o ls , w e

FINE ART FLEA MART, fe a tu rin g

a rtw o rk s, p e rfo rm a n c e a n d

t h e S c h o o l h o u s e f o r s o m e d is

s p e c ia l a d v a n ta g e s a n d ta k e

s h o u ld b e fo c u s in g o u r e n e rg y

d em o s. A lley n e x t to F ire h o u se G allery, B u rlin g to n , 8 6 5 -7 1 6 5 . E very

tin c t i v e q u a l itie s t h a t p u b l i c

p r i d e in t h e i r g r o w i n g a p p e a l,

a n d o u r re so u rc e s o n m a k in g

s c h o o ls h a v e b e e n s lo w t o r e p li

o ffic ia ls a t lo c a l i n d e p e n d e n t

th o s e s c h o o ls e x c e l.”

S atu rd ay , n o o n - 4 p .m . LAKE CHAMP LA IN: T h r o u g h th e L en s A w ard s, th e w in n in g lake-

c a te .

s c h o o ls p la y d o w n c o n c e r n s t h a t p r iv a t e e d u c a t i o n p o s e s a

A c a ta ly tic e ffe c t — th e p i o n e e r i n g o f su c c e s s fu l i n n o v a

t h r e a t to d e m o c r a t i c v a lu e s . “ I

ti o n s t h a t im p r o v e t h e e d u c a

d o n ’t se e h o w o n e lit t l e s c h o o l

t i o n a l e x p e r ie n c e — is o f te n

lik e o u r s — o r e v e n a h a n d f u l

c i te d as p r i m e j u s t i f i c a t i o n f o r

o f i n d e p e n d e n t s c h o o ls — is a

p r iv a t e s c h o o lin g . “ I n d e p e n d e n t

t h r e a t to d e m o c r a c y ,” sa y s

s c h o o ls c a n s e rv e as i n c u b a t o r s

V erm o n t C o m m o n s fo u n d e r

in sp ire d p h o to s o f a m a te u r a n d p ro fe ssio n a l p h o to g ra p h e rs are o n

The Gailer School is hosting a ribbon-cutting ceremony and open house on Thursday, September 3, a t 7 p.m . in Shelburne. Call 9 8 5 -1 2 7 6 for more information.

e x h ib it fo r tw o d a y s only. L a k e C h a m p la in M a ritim e M u s e u m , Basin H a rb o r, 4 7 5 -2 0 2 2 . A u g u st 2 9 -3 0 .

THE STRATEGY BEHIND TODAY’ S BRANDS, f e a tu rin g

case

stu d ie s in c o n te m p o ra ry m a rk e tin g , b y S h a rk C o m m u n ic a tio n s . C h itte n d e n B a n k , m a in b r a n c h , B u rlin g to n , 6 5 8 - 5 4 4 0 . S e p te m b e r 1 -3 0 .

CONTEMPORARIES I,

fe a tu rin g p a in tin g b y C h a rlie E m e rs,

s c u lp tu re b y T o rin P o rter, a n d p h o to g r a p h y b y V ic to ria Z o ln o sk i. C o m p o s t E x h ib itio n S pace, H a rd w ic k , 4 7 2 - 9 6 1 3 . T h r o u g h S e p te m b e r 15.

OPENING THIS BOOK, a r tw o r k

C o m m u n ity o w n e d a n d lo c a lly g r o w n

in m ix e d m e d ia b y R a ch e l

T ro o p e r. P acific R im C a fe , B u rlin g to n , 6 5 1 - 6 9 4 8 . T h r o u g h S e p te m b e r 10.

THE TIME OF THE NABIS, th e

firs t N o r t h A m e ric a n e x h ib it

o f p a in tin g s , d ra w in g s, p rin ts , d e c o ra tiv e a r t a n d p lay b ills b y th e a rtists w h o m a d e u p th e p o s t-im p re s s io n is t a v a n t-g a rd e in th e 1890s. M o n tre a l M u s e u m o f F in e A rts, 5 1 4 - 2 8 5 -1 6 0 0 . T h r o u g h N ovem ber 22.

FRANCIS R. HEWITT '5 7 - ’ 71, d ra w in g s,

A T

TH E

O N IO N

R IV E R

C O -O P .

p r in ts a n d p a i n t

in g s b y th e la te U V M a r t pro fesso r. F ire h o u s e C e n te r fo r th e V isu a l A rts, B u rlin g to n , 8 6 5 -7 1 6 5 . T h r o u g h S e p te m b e r 2 0 .

WALTER BLODGETT RETROSPECTIVE, w a te rc o lo rs

a n d d ra w

ings. C la rk e G alleries, S to w e, 2 5 3 - 7 1 1 6 . T h r o u g h S e p te m b e r 2 7 .

OUTSIDE IN: W o v e n T a p e strie s AHO: T h e Q u a litie s o f H e a v e n &

F o r 2 6 y e a r s t h e O n io n R iv e r C o -o p h a s s u p p o rte d lo c a l p r o d u c e r s .

MAX IME LAM0U R, re c e n t

w o rk s. R h o m b u s G allery , B u rlin g to n ,

8 6 5 -3 1 4 4 . T h r o u g h S e p te m b e r 9.

Our Produce, Bulk, Frozen Meat and Dairy departments purchase from local farmers and producers.

ELDER ART, a

g ro u p o f s e n io r c itiz e n s e x h ib it m ix e d m e d ia .

U n d e rh ill T o w n H a ll, St. P a u l’s U n ite d M e th o d is t C h u r c h , S t. A lb a n s, a n d R ic h m o n d C o n g re g a tio n a l C h u r c h , 6 5 8 - 7 4 5 4 . T h r o u g h

T h e O n io n R iv e r C o -o p g iv e s b a c k to t h e c o m m u n it y .

S e p te m b e r 3 , A u g u s t 2 8 a n d A u g u s t 2 7 , respectively.

DANCING GOWNS, n e w

• A percentage of our sales

goes to community activities and endeavors. Whenever you shop here your purchases help support organizations that promote organic farming, local school and art programs, and many others. The Co-op is locally owned by its customers. No outside investors hold a financial interest in the Co-op.

ERIC

E a r th , n e w p a in tin g s . T .W . W o o d

G allery, M o n tp e lie r, 8 2 8 - 8 7 4 3 . T h r o u g h O c to b e r 4 ,

• We carry a full line of Vermont products and produce from local farmers.

b y K a re n J a c k so n , a n d

clay w o rk b y V era V iv a n te . V e r m o n t C la y

S tu d io , W a te rb u ry C tr., 2 4 4 - 1 1 2 6 . T h r o u g h A u g u st.

DENNIS MCCARTHY & ARMANDO S0T0, paintings and mixed : Nails, Burlington* 865-4973. Throu^i MICHELLE LOPEZ,

in tin g s in m ix e d m e d ia . H a ll, 8 6 5 -7 1 6 6 . T h r o u g h

Everyone is welcome here - you don’t have to be a member. If you’d like to become a member, let us know. You’ll get a discount on your groceries and share in the ownership of our unique, community-owned natural market.

ntstream

W e bring yo u th e b est in fre s h fo o d s, bulk g ro ceries, and n atu ral su p p le m e n ts a t re a so n a b le p rices. C o m e & c h e c k us out! A

c o m m u n ity -o w n e d

n a tu r a l m a r k e t

CELEBRATING 2 6 YEARS 274 North Winooski Avenue, Burlington 863-3659 Mon-Sat. 9-9 • Sun. 11-8 Visa/Mastercard Accepted

page 36

augu s t 26^

h e la r g e s t

se le c tio n of fin e a r tis t m a te r ia ls a t tr e m e n d o u s ■

s a v i n g s . C a ll u s o r s t o p by, i t ’s w o r t h t h e d r i v e .

11 .

RICHARD

6 3 5 -2 2 0 3

DONG Yi BAO, a v is itin g p ro fe sso r fro m C h in a , a n d o th e r w o rk s in gong bihua p a in tin g . A lso, WATE R COLORS b y G la d y s N o k e s . P ic k e rin g a n d F le tc h e r R o o m s, F le tc h e r F ree L ibrary, B u rlin g to n , 8 6 3 -3 4 0 3 .

8 0 0 -8 8 7 -2 2 0 3 .

L o c a te d n e x t to

th e V e r m o n t

< />

S tu d io C en ter.

O ■H i

P e a r l S t.,

J o h n so n .

T h r o u g h A u g u st.

PHOTOGRAPHY SHOW b y

3 0 V e rm o n t p h o to g ra p h e rs . R o u n d B arn , W a itsfie id , 4 9 6 -7 7 2 2 . T h ro u g h

S e p te m b e r 5.

FOLK ART, VERMONT BARNS & LANDSCAPES b y

K ris D aley. D a ily P la n e t d in in g ro o m ,

B u rlin g to n , 8 6 2 - 9 4 3 1 . T h r o u g h A u g u st.

PORTRAITS OF TREES, S e le c tio n s

1 9 9 1 -1 9 9 8 , b la c k -a n d -w h ite silv er-g elatin p h o to g ra p h s o f trees

fro m a r o u n d th e c o u n try , b y T o m Z e tte r s tr o m . F le m in g M u s e u m , B u rlin g to n , 6 5 6 -0 7 5 0 . T h ro u g h S e p te m b e r 2 7 .

HEY: ART OF & ABOUT MAKING HAY, a

g ro u p sh o w in m ix e d m e d ia . W e b b & P arso n s, 5 4 5 S.

P ro sp e c t, # 1 9 , B u rlin g to n , 6 5 8 - 5 1 2 3 . T h r o u g h A u g u s t 3 0 , M o n ;-F ri, b y a p p o in tm e n t.

EXPOSED!

1 9 9 8 , a n a n n u a l o u td o o r s c u lp tu re e x h ib it f e a tu rin g th e w o rk s o f 12 a rtists in m ix e d m ed ia.

H e le n D a y A r t C e n te r, S to w e , 2 5 3 - 8 3 5 8 . T h r o u g h O c to b e r 17.

URSULA VON RYD| NGSVARD: Sculpture. Hood||p &— M u s e u m o f A rt, D a r t m b u ^ % S '

*7*

C o lle g e , H a n o v e r, N .H . , 6 0 3 6 4 6 - 2 8 0 8 . T h r o u g h O c to b e r 4

THE HAY PROJECT,a e o n v i a t h e C h a r l o tte - E s s e x F e r r y

y e tg e n c ^ o f a r t, e u v im n m e n t j

Shopping • Dining • Docking • Lodging Antiques • Art Galleries • Live Theatre

a n d a g ric u ltu re , c e le b ra tin g th e V e rm o n t la n d s c a p e . S h e lb u rn e F iirm s,:S helbunM :, 9 8 5 -8 6 8 6 .C

All W ithin Walking Distance o f the Essex Ferry Dock

T h r o u g h O c to b e r 18.

POST-PASTORAL:

N ew

Im a g e s o f th e N e w E n g la n d la n d s c a p e , f c a t u r i r ^ a s i t e - s p ^ c ific in s ta lla tio n b y B ill B o tz o w a n d 1 4 o th e r c o n te m p o r a r y a rtis ts in m ix e d m e d ia , H o o d M u s e u m o f A rt, D a r tm o u t h C o lle g e , H a n o v e r, N . H . , 6 0 3 - 6 4 6 2 8 0 8 . T h r o u g h S e p te m b e r 20.

ELLEN HOFFMAN, p e n cil d ra w in g s, a n d TOM MERWIN, p a in tin g s .

S C E N E MAKER He was born in West Virginia, but Walter Blodgett (1907-1963) came to understand “real life ” — and the light — from Europe to N ew York, Key West to Vermont. What he learned he translated through his paintbrush. This month the Clarke Galleries show a selection o f paintings and drawings by the late “Ash can” school-inspired artist an d Stowe resident. Above, “Montauk Light, ’’pencil on paper.

Take the C h a rlo tte /E ssex F e rry a n d d isc o v e r A

P e a u tif n l C o lle c tio n tf-a ll Q lo th in y

R ic h ly 5 b y e d

M e rw in G allery,

th e

C a s d c to n , 4 6 8 - 2 5 9 2 . O n g o in g .

SAY THAT WE SAW SPAIN DIE:

P a le tte

S p a n is h E xiles a t t h e M id d le b u ry S u m m e r S c h o o l, fe a tu rin g m a n

u s c rip ts , b o o k s , p h o to s a n d ca ta lo g s. A b e m e th y L ib rary , M id d le b u ry C o lleg e , 4 4 3 -5 5 0 2 . T h ro u g h

o f

N a tw ie

Main Street • Essex, NY

S e p te m b e r 14.

O pen 10am -5pm • 7days • 1.800.898.6098 • w w w .D iscoverH K .com

SUE GRIESSEL, e a rth e n w a re p la tte rs . D a ily P la n e t, B u rlin g to n , 8 6 2 -9 6 4 7 . T h ro u g h A u g u st. TALBOT M. BREWER & WALKER EVANS: A F am ily A ffair. T h e fa m o u s A m e ric a n d o c u m e n ta ry p h o to g r a p h e r sh a re s a n e x h ib it w ith h is b ro th e r-in -la w , w o rk s d a tin g 1 9 2 8 -4 6 . C h ris tia n A . J o h n s o n M e m o ria l G allery , M id d le b u r y C o lle g e M u s e u m o f A rt, 4 4 3 -2 0 6 9 . T h r o u g h O c to b e r.

TRANSFORMATIONS OF TEXT: V isu a l A rts

a n d th e W r itte n W o rd , fe a tu rin g th e w o rk o f n in e artists

— n a tio n a l a n d lo cal — w h o a re /w e re also w rite rs a n d u se te x t in th e ir a rt. H e le n D a y A rt C e n te r, Stow e,

B la c k H o r s e Fine Art Supply

2 5 3 -8 3 5 8 . T h ro u g h A ugust 30. B IN G O 1, boxes, p a in tin g s , scro lls a n d m ix e d m e d ia w o rk b y K a to Ja w o rsk i. V e rm o n t A rts C o u n c il S p o tlig h t G allery , 8 2 8 - 3 2 9 1. T h r o u g h S e p te m b e r 2.

ALBERTO GI AC0METTI, sc u lp tu re s ,

p a in tin g s a n d d ra w in g s b y th e 2 0 th - c e n tu r y m a ste r fro m

F o n d a tio n M a e g h t a n d p riv a te c o lle c tio n s. M o n tre a l M u s e u m o f F in e A rts, 5 1 4 -2 8 5 -1 6 0 0 . T h ro u g h O c to b e r 18. TH E

WORD,

S E E N , a C a ra v a n g ro u p sh o w u s in g la n g u a g e as p a r t o f th e visual ex p erien ce. B everly’s

C a fe , B u rlin g to n , 8 6 3 - 5 2 1 7 . T h r o u g h A u g u st.

BREAD AND PUPPET MUSEUM is open for the season, featuring hundreds of puppets and masks from yearfof the political puppet theater. R t. 1 2 2 , < B&kElJyT REESV BXS^ipM AKp R$,showcasing works ot fthobscot trib e s . | | r m o n t § p l S i t f RELIEF DRAWINGS b y Ed O w re . O n e -W a ll G allery , Seven Days, B u rlin g to n , 8 6 4 -5 6 8 4 . O n g o in g . SCRAP - BASED ARTS & CRAFTS, fe a tu rin g r e -c o n s tru c te d o b je c ts o f all k in d s b y area artists. T h e

H o lb e in S tra th m o re G e n e r a l P e n c il

R e sto re , M o n tp e lie r, 2 2 9 - 1 9 3 0 . O n g o in g . 4 0 Y F A R S O F PH O TO G RA PH Y

„ k _______ k„

19TH AND 20TH CENTURY AMERICAN ARTISTS

9n s°ins- _ FURNISHlNG^ND 5899

2 5 c/< to 50-7r O F F !

ver\da\ Retail Prices

u ..

in c lu d in g la n d sc a p e p a in tin g s b y V e rm o n t

u s e d P INTINGS

Ruth P o p e.

mg I

august

b o o k s

26,

1998

SEVEN DAYS

rt. 15, Cambridge village I

Paints............................ 40% to 45% Off! Airbrushes............................................ 40% Off! & Accessories............. . 30% to 40% Off! Brushes................................. 50% Off! Accessories: Palettes............i............. 30% to 40% Off! Portfolios.................. 40% Off! fads, Manikins..................................... 40% Off! Easel?.......................................................25% Off! Strathmore Paper...... .................. 35% Off! General Pencil....,.:.............................. 25% Off!

200 Main Street, 2nd Fir., Burlington,VT 05041 Phone/Fax (802) 860-4972

tALki nG to ile t, a n d b o t h fa c e d ir e f a m i ly - r e l a te d consequences, b u t, ju s t w h e n y o u c a n ’t k e e p y o u r eyes o p e n a seco n d lo n g e r , th e m o v ie ’s p l o t f in a lly k ic k s in . T u rn s o u t t h e u n iv e r s i ty h a s a lit tle k n o w n p ro v i holding office 44 Most obese 90 Artificial 46 Did a waterway journalist's 91 British prime job minister 50 Loafed 93 Relies 51 Mortarboard 96 Judith Krantz 52 Dry and output withered 97 City on the 54 Drudge Oka 55 Type of ball 99 Rajah's wife or loaf 100 Porter who 56 Cherry-red carried a 59 Fred Mertz's tune? due 101 D D E’s 61 Dye Indigo opponent 62 D .C. lobbying 104 Dies — org. 106 Petty quarrel 63 Believer in 107 Hourglass fill evil spirits 65 W ander from 108 So-so grade 111 U .S. sculptor the group 114 Yellowish67 Rockne, of reddish Notre Dame plastid: Bot. fame 69 Toward the 117 Geron tologist's center topic 71 Evangelist McPherson 118 Graceful racer 72 Rosy 120 Main trunk 75 Certain artery tapestries 77 “Norma —" 121 Christm as visitor 80 Arrow poison 122 Queen of the 81 Ladder or gods mother 123 Movement in starter ballet 83 Prince's “— 124 Envy Rain" another's 84 Spend them possessions in Venice 125 Trevino and 85 Lobsters' lacocca "lungs" 87 “You care not 126 Dam up, or check who — your 127 Verve back..." 128 Cap or pad 69 Those

A CR O SS 1 Cutting remark 5 Theater souvenir? 9 Ironwood 13 Colorful Cincinnati team 17 Style of architecture 18 Yugoslav VIP 19 Baby carriage 20 Typewriter type 22 Pygmy antelope 23 Colorful beverage 25 Enjoyed the blue-plate special 26 Colorful retailer 28 Colorful murderer 30 Old French coin 31 Loses brightness 32 Rachel Carson subject 34 Sm all reticule 35 C lassic car 36 Actress Sheedy 37 Available at once 39 Makes a blunder 41 Expose to

starter DOWN

1 Pack animal 2 French farewell 3 Judge's garb 4 Having a streaked, tawny coat 5 “— Weather" (1933 song) 6 Novices 7 Brain, in the Philippines 8 Plant used in folk medicine 9 Primate 1 0 Sourtempered one 11 Soup server 12 Popular uprising, in France 13 Scarlet tanagers 14 Nobelist W iesel 15 Monetary unit of Kuwait 16 Cubic meter 17 Clothes 21 Root of the taro 24 Bear, Dane or Lakes starter 27 Overlaid with gold leaf 29 River to the Seine 33 Summer refreshers 36 Incite 37 Pillage or plunder

38 River in Belgium 40 Green fodder 41 Garment trimmer 42 Brainstorm 43 Expert's award in judo 44 Gambling game 45 Very, In France 47 Kind of mandarin orange 48 Anagram of vile 49 Take out 51 Joins firmly 53 Necessitates 56 Equatorial constellation 57 Emulate Michael Bolton 58 Prevent, in law 60 Threefold 63 Dijon nobleman 64 Social prohibition 66 Arts degrees 68 Silver/sulfur alloy 70 Ridicule 72 Capital of Latvia 73 Distinct part 74 Legal document 76 They assist RN s 78 Inland sea of Asia 79 Slippery

s io n in its

ones 82 British noble 84 W ash 86 Rubberyielding trees 88 Practice for the bout 90 Canning process 92 Architect Saarinen 94"— Arden" (Tennyson) 95 Town in Pennsyl vania 96 W ords to Nanette 98 Enjoys a comedy 100 New Jersey city 101 Turkish officials 102 Potential energy 103 Paris flower? 105 Heronlike bird 107 Braga of films 108 Cut up the turkey 109 One of the Lauders 110 State, in France 112 Grafted, in heraldry 113 Roll call reply 115 Trundle, as ore 116 Diving bird 119 Sweet potato

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t h e w i r ^ iw the state l e gi s l a t u r e .'

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b a r r e l w h e n t h e o n l y n e w title s

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t h e y already d e ci de d to u s e up the budget surplus on a TAX'cut T ied to the s i z e of Your c a r /

Turn y o u r life experience in to college c re d it Ben &Jerry’s publicist Rob Michalak graduated with a B. A. degree from Burlington College with the help of 60 credits derived from his life experience. The Life Experience Assessment Program can help you earn your degree faster and at lower cost. For more information, please call us at ( 800) 862 -9616. Ask about our new lower L.E.A.P. tuition!

I N T H E N E X T T W O W E E K S T H E Y ’ LL DECIDE IF LEVYING, A S p E C l A L T A X ONLY

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05401 w w w .burlcol.edu

page

SEVEN DAYS

august

26,

1998

PI c tUrEs by R IC K K ISO N A K

pRevlEwS HIGH ART Ally Sheedy has received high praise for her per formance as a burnt-out photog rapher who falls In love with the editor of a prestigious magazine In the directorial debut from Lisa Chodorenko. RETURN TO PARADISE Vince Vaughn and David Conrad co-star with Joaquin Phoenix in the story of two young men who make a risky trip to Malaysia to help a friend who's been jailed. SMOKE SIGNALS Adam Beach and Even Adams play a couple of young native Americans on a road trip in this highly praised independent production from director Chris Eyre.

WHY DO FOOLS FALL IN LOVE? Big-screen bio of leg endary teen doo-wop star Frankie Lymon. STUDIO 5 4 Mike Myers accepts his first dramatic assign ment here In the role of the late Steve Rubell, co-owner of New York's Infamous Studio 5 4 , which served as center of the drugsand-disco universe during the '70s. Also starring Salma Hayek and Neve Campbell. Mark Christopher makes his feature directing debut.

sHoRTs rating s c a l e :

* —

AVENGERS** On the up side,

Murphy’s sticking with the formula that breathed new life into his failing career: A 1* Nutty Professor, the comedian stars here in an update o f another family-friendly classic Albert Brooks, Chris Rock, Norm Macdonald, Paul Reubens and other comics provide the voices for a menagerie o:

1NGFULLY ACCUSED (NR)

ARMAGEDDON** The forecast for Jtlly c^^r testosterone. Lou and loct

a guy named Mithael Myers, but my o f resmererone F„ guess;»;0USlatest installment m the £ |J rounne-li Halloween series *i!l prove less t h a | | | | ! | ; The Negotiator, comes the latest from shagedelie. From the wr|rer;behind 1 ’ ' Jerry {Top Gun, Crimson Tide) Bruckheimer — the noisty, routine movies. With Jamie Lee Curtis and looking story o f a bunch o f ultra Adihi macho space cowboys who try to stop lo w STELLA GOITER \ an oncoming comet from wiping out GROOVE BACK (NR) Angela the world. Bruce Willis, Ben Affleck, H R l teamed for the screen adaptation o f the Patton and Steve Buscemi star. 1996 Terry McMillan best-seller about Michael (Bad Boys) Bay directs, a woman who falls for a man half her THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT age. MARY*** There may be something THE NEGOTIATOR*** Samuel L. about Mary, but there’s nothing about Jackson plays a police negotiator who this movie that’s worth buying a ticket starts taking hostages when he finds to see, since almost all the film’s funny himself framed for murder. Kevin stuff is available for free in its previews. Spactf co-sts»:|i® b4rik presided who vBen Stiller p l | | * | one-rime nerd w hoB breaks o w h fitiit after being cant get ovw,a h ig jh j|i^ ^ ? |^ h ',p ifl " iK ^ p p i^ b a d e m r t m ’With David

New on v i D E o POCAHONTAS II: JO UR NEY TO A NEW WORLD The journey Is straight to video for this follow-up to Disney's ani mated musical, featuring several new songs and a voyage to England for Its heroine. THE NEWTON BOYS**** In a radical departure from his usual milieu, Richard (Slackers, Dazed and Confuted) Linklater brings us a period Western about four brothers who became the most wanted train and bank robbers In North America during the 1920s. Starring Matthew McConaughey, Ethan Hawke, Skeet Ulrich and Vincent D'Onofrio.

F iL M Q u I Z A A P h n n P A rA rl k ir A

r « i > k u ■ i ma h I O I a iim sv # cosponsored by carburs restaurant & lounge

My buddy Paulie was behind the wheel of the van as twilight set tled on a part of Kansas City that had fallen on hard times. A hush came over the vehicle as he suddenly made a U-turn. “See that?” he gasped. I couldn’t believe my eyes. Across the street, beneath a sign which read “The Butcher Boy,” was a storefront in which the most senseless, wild things were taking place. Men with guns stood about watchfully as a young kid wearing an “I saw Madeline” T-shirt went about his dirty work filling orders for a bizarre array of animal flesh. “Give me a pound and a half of black dog,” I overheard an elderly woman say. “Sure thing, Mrs. Brown,” replied the lad, standing in his red cor ner. “What’s on special tonight, dear?” “The Jackal,” came the reply. “It makes a real good burger.” “Heavenly. And how about a pound of the bean and American buf falo salad?” Grizzled men in black aprons constantly walked in and out of the shop. “That darn cat — keeps giving me the slip,” said one. “Consider yourself lucky. I’m on my third mouse hunt of the evening!” answered his burly, grease-smeared friend. “Leave it to beaver to compliment a fine pinot noir...” began the boy with the bloody hands, but we couldn’t stand to hear another sick syllable. Our wheels screeched as we pulled away, and it was all we could do to keep from losing our lunches as we left that dark city behind. “I think a leafy salad for dinner tonight,” my friend managed to offer many miles later. “Can’t hardly wait,” I concurred. Welcome to the version of our game in which you get to catch up on your reading. While you’re savoring the paragraphs above, keep an eye open for the titles of 27 motion pictures that we’ve woven into the literature. We’ll let you off easy, though. You only need to circle with the titles of 20. ©1998 Rick Kisonak

Form orefilmfundon’t forget tow atch“Art Patrol" everyThursdayonH ew sC hannel 5!

LaST w eEK’S WiNnERs

2. HE GOT GAME

ALICE LEAVITT _

EVER AFTER

3. MEET THE DEEDLES 4 . COUSIN BETTE

r i.J S T O E TRUMAN SHOW*‘ *l« jta

about twins who conspire to reconcile Carrey’s been getting the greatest their parenriil^ ^ ^ ^ a i d , N a t a ^ ' ; ' oflg^riweer for his p e t$ |§ g |§ y ; R id u u d s^ :|^ '1 in d sa y Lohan co-sqfeV' mance here as an insurance sale

FILMS RUN FR ID A Y . A U G U S T 2 8 THROUGH THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 3

DEADLINE: MONDAY • PRIZES: 10 PAIRS OF FREE PASSES PER WEEK

PIUSAGIFTCERTIFICATEGOODFOR$25 W ORTHOFNONALCOHOLICFUNATCARBURS SEND ENTRIES TO.- FILM QUIZ PO BOX 68, WILLISTON, VT 05495 BESURETOINCLUDEYOURADDRESS.PLEASEALLOW44W EEKSFORDELIVERYOfPRIZES. INTHE EVENT OF ATIE, W INNERS Will BECHOSENBYALOTTERY

Groove Back 1:20, 4 : 15, 6:50, 9:30. Ever After 12:50, 3 :30, 6 :30. 9 : 10. Saving Private Ryan 12:30, 4 , 7:30. There’s Something About Mary 1: 10, 3 :45, 6 :4 0 , 9 :20. All shows daily.

THE SAVOY

North Avenue, Burlington, 863-6040.

Truman Show 12:45, 3 :50, 5:55, 8. Six Days/Seven Nights 12:20, 2:30, 4 :40, 6 :50, 9. Godzilla 12:20, 3, 5:40, 8 :20. Perfect Murder 4 : 10, 9 . Madeline 12:30, 2:20, 7.

CINEMA NINE

laST W EeK’S aNSwERS: 1. DARK CITY

THE BORROWERS (NR)

ETHAN ALLEN CINEMAS 4

c in e m a s

r>*. . t t i n

DOCTOR DOLITTLE (NR) Eddie

who steals a SJIsiM pli in response t

Peter Hewitt directs this family feature based on the classic Mary Norton stories about a group of miniature people who share a house with normally sized "human beans." Or, in this case, John Goodman.

h o y ts

Scott as her prince. Andy Tennant

to see Sean Connery up and id again. The down side: nearly ting else about this silly, big-screen version o f the ’60s spy scries. Ralph Fiennes and Uraa Thurman star as John Steed Peel. Where’s Austin Powers you need him?

_____________ _________ H20 (NR) In central character may be

th e

***** NR = not reviewed

Main Street, Montpelier, 229-0 5 0 9 . High Art* 6:30, 8:30 (daily).

At the following theaters in our area listings not available at press time. Call for info. SUNSET DRIVE-IN Porters Point Rd., Colchester, 86 2- 1800.

Shelburne Road, S. Burlington, 864-5610

■4tT

Return to Paradise* 12:4 0 , 3 :4 0 , 6 :50, 9:50. Studio 54* 12:05, 2:20, 4 :40, 7:25, 10: 10. Wrongfully Accused 11:45, 1:55, 4 :0 5 . Dead Man on Campus 12, 2: 15, 4 :30, 7:30, 10: 15. The Avengers 7: 15.

CAPITOL THEATRE

9 :35. Madeline 11:4 0 , 1:50, 4 : 10. Snake Eyes 11:55, 2: 10, 4 :35, 7:20, 10. The Parent Trap 1, 4 , 7. Saving Private Ryan 11:30, 3 . 7. 9:30. There’s Something About Maty 12:20, 3 :30, 7: 10, 9 :55. Armageddon 6 :30, 9 :40. All shows daily.

PARAMOUNT THEATRE

SHOWCASE CINEMAS 5

STOWE CINEMA

93 State Street, Montpelier, 229-0 3 4 3 . 241 North Main Street, Barre, 479-9621.

Baggy Knees Shopping Center, Stowe, 253 4678.

Williston Road, S. Burlington, 8634494.

Why Do Fools Fall in Love* 12:4 0 , 3 :30, 7, 9 :3 5 . Dead Man on Campus Fri.-Mon.: 12:20, 2: 15, 4 :20, 7: 10, 9:40. Tue.-Thurs.: 12:50, 3, 7: 10, 9 :40. Blade 12:30, 3 :20, 6 :50, 9:30. Air Bud Fri.-Mon.: 12: 15, 2: 10, 4 : 15. Tue.-Thurs.: 1: 10, 3 : 15. Doctor Dolittle Fri.-Mon.: 12:25, 2:25, 4 :25. Tue.-Thurs.: 1, 3 : 10. The Mask of Zorro 6:40, 9 : 15. Armageddon 6 :20, 9 :20. All shows daily.

NICKELODEON CINEMAS

College Street, Burlington, 863-9515.

MAD RIVER FLICK

Route 100, Waitsfield, 496-4200.

MARQUIS THEATER

Main Street, Middlebury, 388-4841.

WELDEN THEATER

104 No. Main Street. St. Albans, 527-7888.

Studio 54* 12:40, 2:40, 4 :40, 7: 15, 9 :4 5 . Smoke Signals* 1, 2:50, 4:50, 7, 9 , How Stella Got Her

august

26,

1998

SEVEN DAYS

page

Call 864-5684 for rates Deadline is Monday at 5 p.m.

1 1

3 )C3C 11 fIII OUfS

£ J

Call 864-5684 for rates Deadline is Monday at 5 p.m.

EMPLOYMENT BRM DESIGN & METAL WORKS needs a full-time, highenergy, reliable person to help with production. Pay dependent on skills. Call 863-9553 or fax 863-3088.

ADMINISTRATIVE ASSIS TANT: We are seeking a motivated self-starter, both organized and highly detail-oriented, to join our fast-paced team. Primary responsi bility is order entry, but will also assist Supervisors with invoicing, inventory, purchasing, and accounts receivable. Familiarity with PCs a must, experience in the apparel industry and a sense o f fashion helpful, but not necessary. Careerminded individuals please send your resume with cover letter and salary requirements to Human Resources, Box 2 1 1A, Coits Pond Road, Cabot, VT 05647.

CHILD CARE NEEDED: After school child care, M-F, 15-20 hrs./wk. Responsible, caring, cre ative provider needed for 1 sweet 9yr.-old girl. Great position for stu dent. Car, good driving record & refs. Please call 863-0439. CLEANING SERVICE LOOK ING FOR CLEANERS: Part-time, possibly leading to full-time. Must be dependable and have own trans portation. Call 475-2690.

We need you NOW . We need:

(802) 864-8255 (800) 894-8455

T r ia d

PH O N E A G EN TS

Warehouse Packer Full and Part-time. Hourly wage in rapidly growing mail order company. No experience necessary. Send resume to Tammy Whitehouse, Warehouse Manager, PO Box 64769, Burlington, VT 05406.

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the " what am I game."

; to pay for gas. (2904) BURLINGTON, Era a ■to share driving hours are 8:30 to 5 . some flexibility. (2903)

Temporary Service*, ln<

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I f you are self-m otivated , am b itiou s, com p etitive and crea tiv e, w e w ant to talk to you. W e are Verm ont’s only p u b lication exclu sively de voted to technology infomation. W e are currently seeking to fill F u ll-tim e, P a r t-tim e and F le x -tim e positions. C om pensation is base salary plus com m issions and bonuses. M ail or fax resum es to: 33 M ain Street, Ste. 5, Burlington, V T 05401. Fax: (8 0 2 ) 864-3448 Attn: Merry

WE NEED I ADMINISTRATIVE STAFFERS NOW! • Secretaries • Receptionists • Data Entry Call T O D A Y , or stop by 19 Com merce Street, Williston

(802) 864-8255 (800) 894-8455

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Resolution, Inc.

A R E C E P T IO N IS T / S E C R E T A R Y F O R IT S

LTO

(802) 864-8255 (800) 894-8455

ATTN: Call Center 19 Gregory Drive South Burlington, VT 05403 No phone calls, please.

"V ermont public Radio

. ( B l i p I COLCHESTER (MALLETTS BAY) to DOWNTOWN BURLINGTON. Let's split the Work from 8:30 to 5, M1534)

Temporary and temp to hire. Call or stop by today 19 Commerce Street, Williston

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Resolution, Inc. has Full-time and Part-time, seasonal and on-call positions for people who communicate well with customers over the phone. Flexible hours are available in our inbound order-taking Call Center. Excellent compensation/benefits package offered including group incentive programs. If you are friendly and articulate, enjoy helping people, and are comfortable using a comput er keyboard, then we invite you to become a member of our team! Send in your resume or complete an application with us at:

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Temporary Services, In

Adventurous Traveler Bookstore

•Warehouse people •Truck unloaders • Shelf stockers • General laborers • Janitorial help • Production staffers • Diesel bus mechanic • Housekeepers, Custodians, Food prep, staffers

(802) 864-8255 (800) 894-8455

T r ia d

We can put you to work on a great job NOW. We need:

Call TODAY, or stop by 19 Commerce Street, Williston

(802) 864-8255 (800) 894-8455

GOOD I WORKERS NEEDED NOW!

• Database analyst • Visual basic programmer • Excel exp. • Novell networks tech.

• Salespeople • Surveyors/interviewers • Telemarketers • Customer service staffers

Call T O D A Y , or stop by 19 Commerce Street, Williston

FARMHOUSE CHEESE HELPER: Cut, wax & pack cheese for holiday catalog. PT/FT through Dec. Call Eliz., Shelburne Farms, 985-8686.

Ff T & P/T temporary and temp to hire. We need:

FfT&P/T temporary and temp to hire. We need:

• Welders • Painters • Carpenters • Sheetrockers (tapers)

DRIVERS WANTED! Excellent income potential. Cash on nightly basis. FT & PT positions available. Menus on the Move. 863-6325. If no answer, leave a message.

EXTREME SPORTS BAR is look ing to hire for all shifts & positions. Please apply in person. Refer to our display ad for hours & location. 864-8332.

COMPUTER 1 RELATED PERSONNEL NEEDED NOW!

SALES & MARKETING PEOPLE NEEDED NOW!

EXPERIENCED CONSTRUCTION WORKERS

DISHWASHER: Local health food store seeks a self-motivated person to join our kitchen team. Position includes Customer Service, dish washing & some prep work. $6.50/hr. Apply in person to Healthy Living (behind Barnes & Noble), 4 Market St., So. Burlington.

BURLINGTON to FAHC. to share a short commute ami avoid those added parking has sles) Lisa uaveb to FAHC from within Burlington every morning at 6 a.in. (2846) I s u R t n s i c r o N u> I f p H I Why nor offer me a ride o n your daily commute? I live ir Burlington and work in Stowe the 8:30 to 5 p.m. shift. (2847)

See i t . Buy i t . T a k e i t hom e an d c a ll it G e o rg e . SEVEN DAYS classsifieds

SYLViA PLATh

A m eriC orps*V IST A InitiativeC om m u n ity D evelop m en t P osition s A vailable

Burlington’s Community and Economic Development Office, in partnership with local non-profit agencies is seeking motivated, team players for one year, full-time AmeriCorps*VISTA positions at the following organizations: Burlington City Attorney’s Office, Burlington (Community Health Center, and the Burlington Community and Economic Development Office. Community organizing and program development experience a plus. Monthly stipend of $751, health insurance, and a $4,725 education award. People of color, women, persons with disabilities, and Old North End residents are encouraged to apply. For position information, please call 865-7169.

M A t W f i U d e TeA -A hoS-& L b -of /oppe*5 /v d l k

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R eady? Water, Wheat, Soybeans, Seasalt, StVEN DAYS

and S odium B enzoate.

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what am 26,

1998

assif ieds

Call 864-5684 for rates Deadline is Monday at 5 p.m.

FLOWER AMBASSADOR TO deliver, full-time, our flowers and assist in the cleaning & mainte- ■ nance o f our shop. Excellent dri ving record, outstanding communi cation and organizational skills required. Knowledge o f Chittenden County and a commitment to exquisite customer service and a team player a must. Vivaldi Flowers, 350 Dorset St., So. Burlington, VT. 863-2300. GALLERY ASSISTANT: Local craft gallery looking for sales assis tant part to full-tune. $trong retail background and interest in art highly desireable. Flexible schedule, but must be available some evenings and weekends. Fast-paced, fun, friendly work environment. Please drop off resume to Frog Hollow, 85 Church St., Burlington. GRAPHICS/COMMUNICATIONS ASSISTANT: Computerliterate person for portfolio graph ing, presentation production, devel opment o f marketing materials and administrative support for invest ment firm in downtown Burlington. Proficiency with Microsoft Word and graphing expe rience is required, plus familiarity with desktop publishing programs and Excel. Must be detail-oriented and deadline-sensitive. Send resume w/ cover letter to CommunicationsDepartment, P.O. Box 1590, Burlington, VT 05402 or email to dwalker@dwight.com. MAIL ORDER ASSISTANT: Data entry & phone orders. FT through mid-January, poss. year-round. Call Eliz., Shelburne Farms, 985-8686. MENUS O N THE MOVE: Inside position, part-time, answering phones & dispatching. Knowledge of Burlington area helpful. Eves. & weekends a must. Call Menus on the Move, 863-6325. RETAIL ASSISTANT, PARTTIME, to assist customers in flower ordering, selection and purchasing. Requires previous retail experience, knowledge o f flowers and plants, outstanding communication skills and a commitment to exquisite cus tomer service. Position requires a team player interested in assisting all aspects o f shop operations and maintenance. Saturdays arc a must. Vivaldi Flowers, 350 Dorset St., So. Burlington. 863-2300.

Call 864-5684 for rates Deadline is Monday at 5 p.m.

BUY THIS STUFF

BUSINESS OPR

a p t ./ h o u se fo r rent

HOUSEMATES

SERVICES

YOU PAINT IT CERAMIC STU DIO. Jump on the latest trend. The Studio, located in Montpelier, can be purchased with current lease. Potential for business relocation & training. Call Alison, 496-9069.

BURLINGTON: 1 bdrrn. w/ heat inch, So. Union St. $495/mo. Avail. 9/1.652-0806.

B U R LIN G T O N Dism as House

FREE CASH GRANTS! College. Scholarships. Business. Medical bills. Never Repay. Toll Free 1-800218-9000 Ext. G-6908.

BE YOUR OW N BOSS. Work from home. FREE 12-page Special Report & 3-minute message reveal how you can earn SERIOUS income marketing cutting-edge nutritional products. QualitySupport-Results. 1-888-574-3430.

REAL ESTATE GOV’T FORECLOSED HOMES from pennies on $ 1. Delinquent tax, repo’s, REO s. Your area. Tollfree, 1-800-218-9000, Ext. H-6908 for current listings.

VACATION RENTALS PROVINCETOWN CONDO: 10/17-24 and/or 11/21-28. 2.5rm., folly furnished, sleeps 4, 1.5 baths, foil kitchen, pool, tennis, 10mins. from town & national seashore. $350/wk. Call 879-6559.

o f f ic e /stu d io spa ce BURLINGTON: Office s p a c e 950 sq. ft.— to rent or share. $450/mo. Exposed beams, light, bathroom, reception area, overlook ing Battery Park. Call 862-5121. BURLINGTON: Decorative artist looking for someone interested in sharing studio space on Pine St. $200/mo. 660-9267. SO. BURLINGTON: Professional, clean, quiet office space available. Rent by hour, day, week or month. Perfect for health care or alternative healthcare practioncrs. 865-4714.

BURLINGTON: 2-rm., 3rd fir. space in So. End family home. Private bath, shared kitchen. Quiet prof., non-smoker, indoor cat only. $285/mo. Call 862-3526.

ATTENTION LANDLORDS! Established, local company seeks to lease clean, three to eight apart ments under one roof. Each apart ment must have two or more bed rooms. Good neighborhood, handi capped access, off-street parking, on bus line a plus. Need is immediate. Call Megan Price, 802-655-7111 with details. MATURE, PROFESSONAL WOMAN seeks great 2-bdrm. apt. (So. End, quiet area, near down town, max: $700/mo., incl. heat) and conscious, vegetarian female housemate interested in evolving for 9/1. 862-3041.

HOUSEMATES WANTED BURLINGTON: Person to share sunny 3-bdrm. apt. w/ 2 students. Pearl St. location, close to UVM & downtown. $300/mo. + 1/3 utils. Avail. 1/2/99. Call 652-1443. BURLINGTON: Prof./grad to share 3-bdrm. home in So. End. Minutes to marketplace. $325/mo. 652-9099, anytime. BURLINGTON: Grad/prof. sought. 1 roommate for 2-bdrm. house on No. Winooski Ave. Nice back-lot location, parking, gas heat & water. $375/mo. + utils. Avail, now. 865-7896. BURLINGTON: Seeking openminded housemate to share large townhouse w/ 2 males, located 2 blocks from UVM on College St. Own bdrm. & bath. $425/mo., inch utils. 658-2023.

V: —— — '♦ L o c k

Call Dismas House, 658-0381

LOOKING TO RENT

R E N T C R E D IT —

Perfect For Graduate Student— In Exchange For Some Management Responsibilities.

HINESBURG: Non-smoker, 28+, to share modern house in woodland setting. Self-aware, not into TV. $360/mo. + 1/2 propane. Avail, now. Call Richard, 482-4004.

TELEPHONE JACK INSTALLA TIO NS /REPAIR. Quality work, very professional and VERY AFFORDABLE! Will install jacks for modems, multiple lines and extensions to anywhere in house/apt. Will repair jacks also. FREE ESTIMATES. Call 8634873 for an appt.

WINOOSKI: 1 mi. from UVM & St. Mike’s on bus line. Taking responsible, emotionally healthy female to share lovely apt. w/ 2 cats, W /D , off-street parking. 655-1326.

CLEANING SERVICES ANNOUNCEMENTS VOLUNTEERS NEEDED! Join us to present the 6th Annual South End Art Hop. This dynamic event celebrating the Arts with Open Studios, Exhibits in workspace and warehouse galleries and a Silent Auction needs volunteers. Meet and work with creative, communityminded people, Artists & Entrepreneurs in the thriving South End of Burlington. The September 11 th opening party will feature the music o f Rebecca Simone with Jusagroove. Call 660-9580 & leave your name, address & phone.

SERVICES CASH: Have you sold property and taken back a mortgage? I’ll pay cash for all your remaining pay ments. (802) 775-2552 x202. FUN ART FOR YOUR HOME... Paint your child’s bedroom, play room, bathroom w/ fun, original ideas for murals, borders, floors. Call me! Judy Weeks, 864-7652.

BON AML CITRA-SOLV. Life Tree Lavendar & Tea Tree...that’s right, little old name dropper me— Diane H., housekeeper to the stars. 658-7458. “I’m frightfully sure that calling anybody else would be for the birds.”— Alfred Hitchcock.

CHILD CARE NEXT GENERATION PRE SCHOOL & CHILD CARE facili ty opening this September near Essex high school off of Rt. 2A. Now accepting enrollment for chil dren 6-weeks thru pre-school. Call Jim Berns, 879-3779, for more information.

SABRETT H OT DOGS— 240 LBS. Business closed, must sell. 658-9262. TOOL SHEDS ONLY $850. Built by STEP-UP for Women. Sold for cost o f materials. 8’x l0 ’. Erected on site. Call 865-7180 or 865-7142 (TTY).

W O L F F TA N N IN G BEDS TAN AT HOME BUY DIRECT AND SA V E! COMMERCIAL/HOME UNITS FROM $199 F R E E COLOR CATALOG CALL TODAY 1-800-842-1310

MAKE YOUR O W N WINE! Blueberry, Apple, Merlot and Chardonnay. Juice and supplies. Beer, soda and cider, too! Vermont Homebrew Supply, Rte. 15, Winooski. 655-2070.

AUTOMOTIVE 1985 VOLKSWAGON VANAGON, 4 spd., white, water cooled. No rust, looks great inside & out. Runs excellent. Less than 105K mi. Must sell, $2,200. 603862-3472. CARS FOR $100. Upcoming local sales o f Gov’t-seized and surplus sports cars, trucks, 4x4s, SUVs, etc. 1-800-863-9868 x1738. SEIZED CARS FROM $175. Porsches, Cadillacs, Chevys, BMW’s, Corvettes. Also Jeeps, 4W D ’s. Your area. 1-800-218-9000 Ext. A-6908 for current listings.

BUY THIS STUEF SUPER CHEAP HOUSEHOLD ITEMS: Bookshelves, $2; medium mirror, $2; photo frames, $5; small table, $10; full-size futon & frame, $50; and more. Call Melissa, 859-0214.

IT ON EVERY LoCK 1 ...EVEN THOUGH THE CHANCE o F ilN THE COURSE oF HER SEARCH I Fin p in g it s m a t e w a s | sh e m e t a m a n who f e l l in L o v e w ith h e r . INFINITESIMAL.

s he c a m e a c r o s s ...

FoiiNP A KEY THATOULp ONLY Ib a v To S o m e t h in vW p e r f u l .

SALES: Looking for ambitious sales people for Web page sales. Great. money! Set you own hours. Must have laptop. Call 802-864-8332, ask for Dan or Shawn. SECRETARY/RECEPTIONIST/ INSIDE SALES: Energetic person needed to answer phones, greet cus tomers and perform inside sales. _ Resume to: P.O. Box 878 Williston, VT 05495-0878. Good benefits, flexible hours.

W W W .W A Y U y.C O A A

BUT SHE WAS UNAWARE, So PREoCCUPlEP WAS SHE WITH FlNPlNG THE ELUSIVE LoCK.

HE HELPEP HER SEARCH FoR EXOTIC P00RS THAT MIGHT F it t h e k e y ...

...BECAUSE HE KNEW SHE WoULPNT h a v e EYES Fo R him UNTIL SHE FoUNP THE LoCK.

BUT HE CoULPNT STANP To WAIT FoR AN EVENT THAT MIGHT NEVER HAPPEN.

THEN HE CARVEP A BEAUTIFUL CHEST To HoLP THE LoCK.

IN THAT HE PLACEP A RoSE PRESSEP IN A B00K OF L o v e Po e m s .

THEN HE WAlTEP FoR HER To FlNP THE CHEST.

TELEMARKETING: Phone reps, needed for expanding call center. Competitive compensation pack age, many shifts available. Call TM Manager at 863-4700. WAITRESS POSITONS available FT or PT. Experience preferred, but will train. Daytime & evening hours a must. Weekend hours also avail. Flexible scheduling a must. Interested applicants apply in per son at the Golden Dragon, 144 Church St., downtown Burlington.

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BUSINESS OPR GET A LIFE!! Rapidly advancing telecommunications company offers personal freedom for aggressive self starters. Be your own boss w/ flexi ble hours. Call for more informa tion about Excel Communications. For free overview: 1-800-942-9304 ext. 2035#. For more info call Tom, 654-7081.

H ere ' s august

26,

a hint : 1998

T here ' s

less than

OF 1% SODIUM BENZOATE IN ME-FOR m

v k n n . .

page

Call 864-5684 for rates Deadline is Monday at 5 p.m.

ARTISTS! REGISTER N O W for the 6th Annual South End Art Hop, Sept. 11th & 12th, 1998. The Art Hop will include Open Studios, Exhibits, a Silent Auction and a Juried Competition with Juror Amy Schlegel, curator at the Hood Museum o f Art. Over $1,000 in cash prizes. Participation is open to all area artists. Registration deadline is Aug. 29, but register early as exhibit space is limited. For more information and a registration form call 660-9580 or stop by the Firehouse Gallery, 135 Church St., Burlington, Wed.-Sun. 12-6, Fri. 12-8. Sponsored by the Pine St. Arts & Business Association.

EXPERIENCED & DEDICATED lead vocalist/acoustic guitarist need ed ASAP for working band, Empty Pockets. Also need drummer to start by 1/1/99. Regular booking through 1999. Call Glad, 4825230. GUITARS: Fender Squier Telecaster, 1987, Japanese, blonde, maple fretboard, excellent cond., $225. G&L SC-3, 1987, USA, red, rosewood fretboard, locking tuning, roller nut, etc. excellent cond., $375. 985-9481. HARD DISK RECORDER, Roland VS-880 w / CD Burner and Zip drive, $1,800; SECK 1282 8bus mixing board, $450; Alesis Quadraverb, $150; Peavey 1x15 speaker cab, $100; Alesis SR-16 drum machine, $175. Call 4344576, leave message. INTERNS WANTED: Seth Yacovone Blues Band seeks hard working, outgoing, responsible interns. Must LOVE our music. Loyal and willing to take direction as well as be creative. Learn the music business from the inside out! Interested persons should send a letter o f interest to: SYBB, P.O. Box 112, Winooski, VT 05404.

(Ui

N O SECRETS” COMPILA TIO N C D commemorating the 25th anniversary o f the Womens Rape Crisis Center is now in Stores! 14 VT artists celebrate and benefit the WRCC: Rik Palieri, Aaron Flinn, Lara & Greg Noble, Chin Ho!, Full Moon Heart, Scott McAllister & Meredith Cooper, Rachel Bissex, Yolanda, Katherine Quinn, Whisky Before Breakfast, Strangefolk, Rebecca Simone w/ The Orange Factory featuring Craig Mitchell, Motel Brown, Kate Barclay, & guests Mistle Thrush of Boston, MA. Also avail, online at www.bigheavyworld.com.

assifie

RED M EA T

GUITAR: All styles & levels. Emphasis on developing strong technique, thorough musicianship & personal style. Paul Asbell (Unknown Blues Band, SklarGrippo). 862-7696.

HARDCORE/GRIND GUI TARIST seeks musicians to form band. Infl.: Carcass, Damnation A.D., Napalm Death, Godflesh. I have equip., transportation & dedi cation. Will travel. Dan, 545-2606.

PIANO: Beginning to advanced, age 3 to 103! Classical technique to improv. Open, holistic approach. Ero Lippold, 862-9727.

W H O TH E HELL WANTS TO ROCK? Drummer looking to join band & play [insert your creative category here] rock. Infl.: Jesus Lizard, Hum. John, 985-1289. AD ASTRA RECORDING. Relax. Record. Get the tracks. Make a demo. Make a record. Quality is high. Rates are low. State o f the art equip. & a big deck w/ great views. Call (802) 872-8583.

MUSIC INSTRUCTION DRUMS & PERCUSSION: Learn to play, not imitate. Emphasis on self-expression & independence. All levels, styles, ages. Gabe Jarrett (Jazz Mandolin Project, Gordon Stone, James Harvey), 951-9901.

A n s w e r s To L a s t W e e k ’s P u z z l e

b<\x cqnnon Well...if that security guard I ran over on the way in regains consciousness, I could almost guarantee at least one.

Are there a lot of cars stolen around here?

WANTED: SINGER/FRONTperson, Classic rock to modern pop. Blues to country rock. Ready to gig. Just waiting for the right person. Serious & dedicated only. 496-3166 or 253-7885.

THE KENNEL REHEARSAL SPACE. Rooms available for musi cians & bands on monthly/hourly basis. 24-hr. access, lock-outs & storage avail. Reservations req. For rates & more info call 660-2880. 3017 Williston Rd., So. Burlington.

fro m th e s e c re t file s o f

step stool to stagnation

Johnny Lemonhead! Say...would you mind sitting in the front seat of my car and keeping an eye on things while I run into the market?

DRUMMER WANTED for coun try band. We play new country. Call Elton, 802-644-8497.

Call 864-5684 for rates Deadline is Monday at 5 p.m.

N.E. SINGLES CONNECTION: Dating & Friendship Network for relationship minded Single Adults. Professional, Intelligent, Personal. Lifetime membership, Newsletter. Call for Free info, (800) 775-3090.

We’ve shown 3500 people a better way to meet.

SUPPORT GROUP

MASSAGE TREAT YOURSELF TO 75 MINUTES OF RELAXATION. Deep therapeutic massage. Sessions: $40. Gift certificates. Located in downtown Burl. Flexible schedule. Aviva Silberman, 862-0029. EXPERIENCE TH E ULTIMATE MASSAGE! Treat yourself or a friend to the incredible relaxation & effectiveness o f exquisite Oriental massage w/ JinShin Acupressure. Assists in stress relief, injury recovery & renewed vitality. Fantastic gift! Gift certificates avail. $5.00 discount w/ ad. Acupressure Massage o f Burlington, J. Watkins, 425-4279. TRANQUIL CO NNECTION MASSAGE THERAPY. Pamper yourself or a special someone to a message w/ Tranquil Connection. Soak in hot tub prior to session to mellow your mind, warm your body in serene, private setting. Sessions start at $45; Head & foot massage $20; Spec, package: 3 sess. $100. For appt. or leave msg. Board certified therapist. 654-9200.

Hof! Live! 1 on 1

1 -8 0 0 -4 5 8 -6 4 4 4 1 -9 0 0 -4 3 5 -4 4 0 5

863-4308

www, compatibles.com

MEN AT PEACE: an in-depth group dealing with a variety of masculine issues. Many techniques will be explored. $7. Call Eric, 6520027 for details.

NASTY GIRLS!!!

EXOTIC DANCERS: Male & female for bachelor(ette), birthday, strip-o-grams, frat/sorority parties. Quality/dependability guaranteed. Serving all of New England. 1-800-347-2468. www.fantasyenterprises.com. MMMM, I’M A H OT CALI. GIRL, ready to make U explode all over!!! Kandy, 1-800-955-4725. $1.75/min. Must be 18+. V/MC/Amex/Debit Cd.

CITY OF BURLINGTON PUBLIC HEARING The Burlington City Council will hold a public hearing on Monday, September 14, 1998, at 7:00 p.m. in Contois Auditorium in City Hall to hear comments on proposed zoning amendments regarding Non-Design Control Exemptions, also referred to as Zoning Amendment #98-02; Administrative Approval o f Home Occupations, also referred to as Zoning Amendment #98-03; and Publicly Accessible Restrooms on Public Trust Lands, also referred to as Zoning Amendment #98-04. Jo LaMarche Assistant City Clerk

B fM A i t 6 R 0 6 b llJ G ^ T c l wm to be seeru o g ^ ERLighte N m o o i ) Bar

MIND REMAlOS irtTCftty P r e o c c u p ie d vd i t H VEAgm t^ d is t r a c t io n s !

/D 0 f t W 6 m e d it a t io n , I , /TBltOVi PEPRAVEP, LUSTFUL ' TH006HTS ABOUT T H E . o t h e r a c o l y t e s ho l THE!ft TIGHT, G L i0 6 lN G ; (S E X O A a y TANTALIZING, PRATER ROBES 1

INSTEAD OF contemplating 10VING RliOpKJESS, I AM F IulE P WITH HATEFUL FtEU^&S ABOUT My MtplTA-noO PlLUXO, WITH

VTS COURSE, ITCH^ F IB E R S

PSYCHICS

AND CHEAP, LUMPy STUFF I/OG j

ASSUMING THAT, YOU D O N ’T KNOW how many days in your life-time. Call 1-900-3703399 Ext. 7761. $3.99 per min., must be 18 yrs. Serv-U (619)645-8334. WHAT DIRECTION SHOULD you go??? Let a Psychic Help!!! Just call 1-900-267-9999 Ext. 8113. $3.99 per min. Must be 18 yrs. Serv-U (619) 645-8438.

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I' m SOY SAUCE!... I t was the sodium benzoate bit that threw you, -

SEVEN DAYS

wasn' t it? I thought so. ' ‘august

26.

1998

Vitamin Connection

S i m p l y

Vitamins - Herts - Homeopathics - Books - Bodq C a re - Pet C a re

Areas Largest Selection If QUALITY, SERVICE & PRICE Nothing Synthetic or Artificial are important to you when shop Knowledgeable & Professional Service ping for Vitamins, Herbs and other Supplements-25utUn^ton’s O n l y AJu t ’Utiona.L S p e c i a l t y S h o p WHY should it matter what day of L o w e r M ain S tre e t • D o w n to w n B u rlin g to n • 8 6 2 -2 5 9 0 the month (or week) it is? A c r o s s fro m D o w n h ill E d g e • O pen M o n -Sa t 1 0 a m -6 p m

SAVE 2 0 - 5 0 % EVERYDAY

AEROBICS • DANCE SWIM LESSONS YOUTH &ADULT SPORTS

CA LL NOW

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w w w .V ita m in C o n n e c tio n .c o m • Mail O rd e r W o rld w id e

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for our FALL BROCHURE!

N m *om *& cn to* J A o ta p y JCSkilled T h e ra p is t ^ B e a u t if u l O ffice s fG ift ce rtificate s sT G re a t ra te s

862-9622

K ir s te n

MASSAGE

864-0444

INTRODUCTORY RATE $35 FOR 75 MINUTES

THE R O L F IN G CEN TER

LAURA LUCHINI 8 6 5 -1 2 3 3

MARION TREDEAU, M A , R.N., C.S.: 223-7798, Montpelier; 454-1432, Plainfield. See display ad.

JIN SH IN JYUTSU. Harmonizes Spirit, Mind and Body. A simple acupressure-type practice that works at the cause level of dishar mony. Experience deep relaxation, alleviation o f pain, boosted immune system, release o f toxins. Treatment and Self-help classes. Stephanie Suter at Pathways to Well Being, 862-8806.

RADIANCE MASSAGE: 8644959, Burlington. See display ad.

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T l\O h > 4 S

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d ence o f your foolhardy lack o f care in the sun, they’re sure in gettin g older w ith ray friends, and seeing on our c a d e n c e o f ou r loss*# m i. p y m e h e d there let m e kn ow I’m n ot just sitting back and w atching it all happen. However, vanity is a dem anding mistress, and I’ll adm it that I have m y ow n treatments that hide certain facts o f aging, so just for you, I called Dr. Robert G ordon in Burlington, a derm atologist w h o specializes in cosm etic dermatology. G ordon said that the first step in this process is to

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you m ay respond to the various options available. For fine lines and “m inor texture changes," G ordon w ill usually go w ith the m ildest treatment, the glycolic facial peel, w hich can provide results overnight. T h e next step in intensity, the O baji Blue Peel, can dramatically im prove brown splotches on the face, and

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Patients w h o are treated w ith the C 0 2 laser take longer greater. G ordon is currently studying w ith an expert in

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SEVEN DAYS

by n ot sm oking, and always using sunscreen, G ordon said. I m yself think that taking m y standard advice will also help: D rink lots o f water, get your exercise, eat your vegetables, and don’t worry so m uch, @ Neither Seven Days nor any practitioner quoted here may be held liable fo r any result o f trying a new remedy, practice or product that is mentioned in this column. Please use common sense, listen to your body, an d refer to your own health practitioner fo r advice. Readers a n d practitioners are welcome to subm it questions an d sug gestions fo r Health Q & A. Send to Seven Days, PO B 1164, Burlington, V T 05402, or e-m ail sevenday@together.net.

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A u gu st 27- Sep tem ber 2

A R IES

(Mar. 2 1 -Apr. 19): M aybe you ’ve heard this one: W hat d id the

disruptive) cosm ic forces that are now trying to w orm their way into your

Buddhist m onk say to the hot dog vendor? “M a k e m e one w ith everything. ” But n ow here’s the rest o f the story.

life, you will graduate forever from the i m indset in w hich you say, “I do whatever the voices in m y head tell me to d o .” In place o f that questionable m odus operandi, you will be strongly

T h e vendor gives the m onk his meal and the m on k hands over a $ 2 0 bill. T h en the vendor stashes it in his apron and turns his attention to the next custom er. “But w here’s m y change?” the m on k inquires. W hereupon the vendor replies, “C hange m ust com e from w ithin, m y friend.” A n d w hat does this have to do w ith your life, Aries? I believe you ’re about to have an analogous experience. G etting a dose o f divine truth — I’m sure you agree — som etim es requires a brush w ith a trickster.

TAURUS

(Apr. 20-M ay 20): Last June, philanthropist Alan “Ace” G reenberg contributed $1 m illion to buy Viagra for m en w ith small bank accounts. Em ulating his exam ple, I’d be happy to donate a free love spell to all you Tauruses w h o can’t afford to hire a w itch for help in b oostin g your aphrodisiacal powers. To tell you the truth, though, I don’t think you’ll need it any tim e soon. From what I can tell, y o u ’re already as foxy and irresistible as it’s possible for you to be. In fact, casting a love spell m ay qualify as overkill. N on eth eless, here it is i f you w ant it. Light a red candle at tw ilight on Friday. After kissing a roll o f ch ild ’s caps that you b ought in the toy

kindergarten, a tim eout occurs w hen a

VIRGO

messages. A nd since this is exactly what life is like on the planet these days, you may be the wisest and

corner to think about what he did. In the life cycle o f a G em ini, this week’s tim eou t m ay resemble both those

(Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “Kids have the good sense to choose one lollipop today over three lollipops tom orrow,” says W ayne Dyer. Unfortunately, m any o f you Virgos

other kinds. Take advantage o f this pregnant pause to fantasize about what you could b ecom e if you n o longer

lost this knack years ago. You’re constantly p ostp on ing your gratification for a m ythical feast day

w ho love to foretell econ om ic collapse, killer quakes, m ysterious plagues, and

had to play by any o f the old rules.

that never arrives. But w ith the authority vested in m e by all the planetary forces, I hereby declare that

a terrorist kidnapping o f the Spice Girls. I cou n t m yself as one o f the rare prophets o f boom w h o envisions and

this cycle o f denial has got to end now. Treat yourself, finally, to the fun you ’ve

thereby helps to materialize the best

child has spun ou t o f control and the teacher sends him o ff by h im self to a

CANCER

(June 21-July 22): At odd

tim es, on ce or tw ice a year, I get a paym ent o f about $ 1 9 from the Screen Actors G uild. It’s a residual for the bit part I had in the 1994 m ovie Being H um an, starring Robin W illiam s. I predict on e o f those checks will straggle in to m y m ail box during the next couple weeks. It’s that tim e in the Cancerian cycle w hen our tribe is

been earning for eons.

strongest o f us all.

SAGITTARIUS

(Nov. 2 2 -D ec. 21): I

say to hell with the prophets o f d oom

possible scenarios. O f course that’s easy when it com es to you Sagittarians

LIBRA

(Sept. 23-O ct. 22): Tibetan Buddhist teacher C hogyam Trungpa

these days. Your fear o f success is at its lowest levels in years; your self sabotage m echanism is in sleep m ode;

used to talk about a class o f wraiths called the preti. It has a m outh as big

and you ’ve lost interest in relying on your staid old tricks. I predict,

as whale, but a throat the size o f a

tem pted to m ake the follow ing affirm ation your new m otto: “1 do m e to d o .”

PISCES

(Feb. 19-Mar. 20): In his

book M en a n d the Water o f Life, ^Michael M eade suggests that there’s been a m istranslation o f on e o f the co m m o n sign-offs in old fairy tales. T h e original phrase was not, “T hey lived happily ever after,” bur rather, “T h ey lived happily in the ever after.” \ T hat is, w hen they died and w ent to heaven they had n oth in g but sweet serenity. “In this w orld ,” however, M eade says, “they found happiness as often as they foun d sorrow, and that

likely to be rewarded for old accom plishm ents and blessed by blasts from the pasts. I w ouldn’t be

needle. It’s insatiably voracious for everything it sees, but can’t ingest a dam n thing. Som etim es I m yself feel

therefore, that you will have the capacity to pull o ff a m asterwork that you’ve always felt was possible for your hero to accom plish but n ot you.

was enough." W h a t’s this got to do w ith you, Pisces? It’s a perfect tim e to cultivate m ore realistic and soulful

surprised, in fact, if I got as m uch as $ 3 8 this tim e around. You should expect a similar boon.

like the preti — it’s m y lot as an orally fixated Cancerian — but I’m surprised to see you Libras so close to slipping

CAPRICORN (D ec. 22-Jan. 19): D o you consider yourself a victim o f

crippling rom antic delusions.

LEO

into that state. I don’t know whether this warning w ill be sufficient to divert

(July 23-A ug. 22): If you’re a Leo real estate developer, this is a pretty

good m om en t to begin turning rich farmland or rolling m eadows in to a

you, but I can assure you that even if you succum b, your torm ent w ill last no more than 13 days.

injustice? If so, this w ill be a perfect week to fight back and w in vindication. H o w do you feel, for that

expectations about love. T h e cosm os is j ready to help you outgrow your m ost

You cmn c a ll R o b B rexsn y, day o r n ig h t fo r y o u r

matter, about the am ount o f beauty in your life? If it’s lacking, the com in g

days will be prim e tim e to fill yourself

shopping mall. By that I mean you

l y

w ou ld suffer on ly a thousand years o f

SCORPIO

bad karma instead o f the m illion years you’d incur i f you did the dirty deed at

were an animal, you’d be a sw eet sm elling skunk or a helpful jackal. If

intensity o f the truths you hear and

1 -9 0 0 -9 0 3 -2 5 0 0

im perfections to arouse and am use.”

any other tim e. But m ay I recom m end an alternate course o f action that

you were a m eal, you ’d be a hot, spicy b eef jerky topped w ith whipped

express? D o n ’t even think about h old ing back on that score. Ideally,

$ 1 .0 0 p a r minute.

GEM INI (M ay

w ou ld actually earn you karmic credit? All you m em bers o f the Leo tribe will

cream. If you were a song, you’d be an

you’ll coordinate these three projects and becom e a snorting yet graceful warrior for justice, beauty, and truth.

Touchtone phone.

section o f the drug store, say this prayer aloud: “Dear Goddess: Show m e h o w to use o n e o f m y

21-June 20): In

A m ish culture, a tim eou t is w hen you n g people experim ent w ith the outside world and decide w hether they w ill ultim ately return to the fold. In

page

be rewarded in the com in g weeks if

(O ct. 23-N ov. 21): If you

uplifting N ew Age ballad as perform ed by heavy metal rock gods. In other

up. Finally, Capricorn, is there anything you can do to increase the

18 and over.

c/a 8 1 8 /373-9788 And do n ’t fo rg o t to c h e c k out R o b ’* Web mite mt

you work to bring the joys o f civilization to the overgrown forests in

words, Scorpio, you’re a raging hunk o f sexy contradictions. You’re a

AQUARIUS

your souls.

tow ering powerhouse o f m ixed

cooperate w ith the b enevolent (though

SEVEN DAYS

whatever the voices in m y heart tell

(Jan. 20-Feb. 18): If you

mrmrmr.raelmstrology.com/ Updated Tuesday night.

august

26,

1998

to respond to a personal ad call 1 - 9 0 0 - 3 7 0 ^ We’re open 24 hours a day! $1.99 a minute, must be 18 or older. : DWF, 47, 5’3 ", 150 LB S, SHORT : BROWN HAIR, large hazel eyes, seeks I DWM, 40-50, for close friendship. Not • looking for marriage or live-in, just a ♦ friendly visitor. No married men, * please. No drinkers. You must smoke. * Local men only. 1833_________________ • LONG, LEAN, LOVELY, LONELY LIONESS ♦ ISO literate, limber, lusty lover for lyriARE YOU OUT THERE? Intelligent. attrac • cal liaisons in my sylvan lair. 1838 tive, professional D/SM, 38-55, enjoys healthy lifestyle, outdoors, theater, music, travel, along with desire for Aschin q wom en laughter/spontaneity? If so, call me...l offer what I'm looking for!! 1880______ SWF, W ELL-BUILT, FULLY LOADED, cruise control optional, look under the hood, classic 1977, low mileage. No lemons here. A true classic. 1914______ STATUESQUE, IRREVERENT, OPTIMIST seeks witty, intelligent, warm PM, 3545, who loves life, the arts, the dcean...and doesn’t mind the occasional chick flick. 1917___________________

HELP BRING OUT MY INNER WILD CHILD. SWF, 18, red/btonde hair, on the shy side, ISO SM, under 25, to bring me out of my shell. 1986______________________________ HEY, SAILOR! EXPERIENCED 1ST MATE, varied interests/abilities, attractive, very seaworthy. Has weathered the storm, ready to test the waters. ISO fun, intel ligent, attractive guy, 38-48, who’s got it together. 1988_____________________ DWPF, 44, PLATTSBURGH, NY, ISO A real man, one who knows that love is something that grows, and that friend ship is the stem of the rose. I am liter ate, witty, sensitive, Gemini, 5’2 ”, active, talkative and often audacious!! Let’s get together and check out the chemistry. Smile. 1946________________

m n Asokin q nm x LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO SPEND IT ALONE. SWF, 48, petite, blonde, a true romantic, emotionally secure, kind, car ing, honest, loving. I enjoy travel, walks, cooking, reading and quiet times. 2000_________________________ HAVE A KID, HAVE A JOB, HAVE A HOUSE. Wonder what is next. SWF, educated, funky, artistic, professional ISO professional, 45-55, creative, enjoys dancing, cooking, gardening and moonlight. 2002_________________ SEEKING A COUNTRY MAN (SPM ). 30 40, who loves the outdoors, animals, intellectual stimulation; enjoys conver sations, travel, sense of humor. I’m a SPF, 32, hoping to find you! 2005 SW PF, 30 , LOOKING FOR SPM , 29- 35 , who appreciates the wonders of nature, a sense of humor, enjoys the challenge of adventure, but also content with life’s simple pleasures. 2004 CURIOUS, PLAYFUL, HONEST SW F. 31 , ISO independent, active, thoughtful, centered, self-aware, NS male to share stories, dreams, adventures and any other common interests we find. 2007 SF, 42 , FULL-FIGURED, SEEKING FINAN CIALLY & emotionally secure man for friendship. Interests: investing, art, the ater, movies, books, travel. Age 35-45. 2008._______________________________ TIRED OF DOING THINGS BY YOURSELF? I’m yours: a young, athletic SWPF, 46, sports enthusiast with a sense of humor; likes current events, water, music, books, hiking. 2011____________ ADVENTURE, QUIET TIM ES, INDEPEN DENT, vulnerable, shy, outgoing, seri ous, silly, artist, camping, biking, walk ing, plays, classical to blues. NS, 46, 5’7”. 137 lbs. Looking for LTR. 1983

INDEPENDENTLY WEALTHY, GORGEOUS, brilliant, completely secure, witty, 39ish (almost all of the above), looking for same. 1952__________________________ CALLING ALL JEWS!!! Where’s the tribe? DJF, 37, 5’9”, 120 lbs., gorgeous, leggy, bionde/blue, Ashkenazi, looking for male M.O.T./Basheert. In VT, you’re your own Sidduch. Vey iz mir! 1950________ ME; SWF, 18. W/ BLUE EYES, RED HAIR, a love for animals, fun and cuddling. You: SM, 18-23, w/ similar interests and a warm heart. We must meet! 1974 REGGAE, CAMPING, SKIING, LAUGHING. 5’6”, 115 lbs., blonde female ISO "slightly” overweight, tall, attractive, athletic, confident, NS M, 26-33, to hang out and have fun with. Dark hair a +. 1926____________________________ I’M A BITCH, I’M A LOVER, I’M A CHILD, I’m a mother, I’m a sinner, I’m a saint...I’m attractive, petite, 38, SWF with varied interests looking for a SM friend and activity partner. Tall, dark & handsome encouraged to reply! 1928 CAN I GET YOUR ATTENTION? IN NEED of love and affection. Single lady, 30, needs your attention. Looking for same intentions. 1938_____________________ DANCE WITH M L DWF, 50ISH, attrac tive, petite, NS, enjoys dining, dancing, cookouts, movies, walks. ISO caring, sincere, healthy M for friendship, possibly more. 1907______________________ TOO MUCH FUN IS NEVER ENOUGH. Excessive in all things, but practicing moderation. Me: PSWF, 51, tikes to par ticipate, instead of observe, in all activities. ISO PSWM, NS, young 50, but energy of a 20 yr. old. Must play in overdrive. 1909______________________ SEE AD "TOO MUCH IS NEVER ENOUGH." Substitute 30s for 50s. Energy of 20 yr. old a must. If you want to be a player—not a spectatorin life, I’m your girl! 1910

HEALTHY, HAPPY, ATTRACTIVE, intelli gent, athletic DWPF, 51, loves family, friends, pets, outdoor activities, music, books, flowers, good food and laugh ter. Seeking compatible M, 40-60, who loves life. 1883______________________ MTN. BIKER BABE SEEKS CYCLING dude for fat-tire fun. Need someone who can wield a wrench when I totally pretzel my derailleur back in the boonies. No beginner geeks, please. 1889________________________________ LE T S HIT THE TOWN! SWF, 25, enjoys music, dancing, going to the movies, ISO attractive, fit dance partner & friend, 23-33, that knows how to respect a woman. 1847_______________ RECENTLY SINGLED WF, GREEN EYES, red hair, small waistline, 5’6”, 109 lbs., ISO WM, 18-23, tall, exciting and sometimes likes to be in charge. 1848______ STARDATE JULY. 1998 : TRANSPORTER malfunctioned; tost on deserted alien planet. Lost away team. Repaired com municator to send SOS beacon. Planet of origin unimportant. SBF, 35. 1854 ATTRACTIVE, BROWN HAIR, GREEN eyes, 40, 5’6", 105 lbs. DPF. Likes Bernie, The Nation (especially Katha Pollitt), dancing, jazz & classical music and more. Seeks man w/ similar interests, who is tall w/ athletic build. 1861 SPIRITUAL, RADIANT, M YSTICAL, sensu al, open-hearted DWPF, phsysically fit, attractive, young 45, enjoys yoga, med itation, dancing, hiking, biking, organic gardening, music. Seeks active, spiritu ally evolving partner for heartfelt connections. 1862_______________________ SAILING, SWIMMING, HIKING, HEAVY metal concerts, country-rock dancing, constitutional arguments, explosives research, make “It” legal. ISO romantic, intelligent, marriageable M. 1866______ SENIORS! HEY, YOU OLD GUYS! Come on out from hiding! Will cook fresh country meal in exchange for fine restaurant dining. SWF, university-edu cated, musical, artistic, master gardener, filmmaker. 1867_____ _____________ MEDITERRANEAN WOMAN, SOULFUL, sensuous, energetic, 40s, who loves music, interested in sharing time (and dancing) with insightful, sensuous and compassionate man of a progressive bent with zest for life. 1870___________ I DONT SM O KL I SMOLDER. Smart, sexy SWPF seeks similarly incendiary S/DM, 38-50, for summer campfires. Love of water and woods desired. Music, dancing, books & film also light my fire. LTR maybe, but fun first. 1871 I ONLY HAVE FIVE WORDS TO SAY: “I am tired of JERKS!” SWF seeks SWM, 30s, to experience the summer nights by the lake with... 1872

FORTY, FUNNY, FIT (ALMOST). Biking, boating, blues. Smiling, happy and fun? Could we make each other laugh? Send picture (of your bicycle!) or call.

mi___________________

COUNTRY MAN, 33 , SWM, 5’io ”, ISO D/SWF, 28-38. I enjoy the outdoors, movies, music, cooking big meals and honesty. Friendship, LTR. No alcoholics. Is this you? 2001_____________________

WANTED: COWGIRL/FARMGIRL SWM, 40s, NS, ND, good-looking, fit, healthy, energetic, down-to-earth, 5’n ”, 165 lbs., enjoys country, animals, auctions, fancy trucks and good women. ISO attractive, fit, healthy country girl. 2006 SINGLE PARENT DAD, 51 , ENGINEER, having fun, but need someone special for myself. She’s hopefully slender, tall or petite, an independent thinker who enjoys humor and verbal jousting. Age open. 2013__________________________ EDDIE BAUER D ESIRES VICTORIA’S Secret. Burlington-born, Boston-educat ed, European-traveled, financially fit SM, not that much over 30, seeks witty, out-going, alluring, creative SF for companionship, friendship, possible LTR. 2019___________________________ SWM, 38 , 5 ’u " , CARPENTER. INTER ESTS: hiking, snow-shoeing, skiing, canoeing, camping, self-sufficient lifestyle. ISO pioneer woman interested in homesteading on 25 acres, simple, self-reliant life. 1980_________________ SAILING COMPANION. RETIRED BUSI NESS executive needs a young pair of hands to help sail on Lake Champlain and Maine Coast this summer. Can accommodate your vacation schedule. Sailing experience not necessary as I will teach you how to sail. 1987_______ GIRLS, YOU CAN’T FEIGN “THE ACTION in playing up romance.” To lay claim to my reasoning, I am referring to us having “a date together!” Ciao. 1981______ SWPM, 38 , 5 ’li" , 205 LB S., ENJOYS golfing, hiking, antique shopping and traveling, as well as reading, music, dining, long romantic walks and cud dling on the couch. ISO SWPF, 30-40, to spend time with. If we have these things in common, give me a call. 1991 LIBERALLY-SEASONED, SECURE, ener getic, handsome SWM, 41. Multifaceted world traveler, successful, professional, extremely fit. Intentionally open to kin dling that special relationship with earthy, attractive, witty woman of passion and substance. 1992.____________ SWM, 31, WHO IS ADVENTUROUS, lov ing, caring, cute and lively, seeks S/DF, 24-36, who enjoys life, conversation, outdoors and will be my best friend, partner, lover, companion. Try me. 1998

YOUR BEST FRIEND, FOREVER. DWPM, 48, handsome, fit, NS, neatly groomed, enjoys travel, dancing, walks, sports and cooking. ISO honest, fit woman, 35-50, for LTR. 1939_________________ NOT A PARADOX: ECOLOGY NERD/HIP musician, world traveler/hick, sensual/ascetic. SWM, 25, active, evolv ing, seeks connection with the earth and all things. 1944__________________ 2 FUNNY, ACTIVE, SEN SITIVE, FORMER VT guys in 50s, vacationing on Lake Champlain, looking for slender, fun-lov ing females for sailing, water activities, tennis, biking, conversation and cookouts. 1943__________________________ SEEKING PLAYFUL PARTNER WHO enjoys a good time! Friendship, fun, even romance! Me: DWPM, youthful 40, adventurous, athletic, active, witty. You? Excite me with your enthusiasm! Let’s dance! 1948____________________ CREATIVE 81 ATTRACTIVE, 31 . Want to meet more women my age. If you like soft-spoken, sensitive, intelligent men, give me a call. 1949__________________ DON’T CALL UNLESS you talk, eat, laugh and dance. It’s good if you’ve been around the track 40 or 50 times. I’ve got a slow hand. I’m willing to drive. 1951__________________________ SWING, SWING, SWING. Dancing cohort needed for SPM, 32. Me: 6’, br./br., flat foot floozee learning to jump. You: brown derby chic who lives for kicks. Everything else but enthusiasm sec ondary. Let’s have some laughs and step it out. 1953 ___________ SM, 44, 5*8", FIT, EDUCATED, openminded, sense of humor, value rela tionships. Range of interests, active, but not fanatical. Seeks woman over 30, sexy, under 5*6”. 1954 ________ SEPARATED WM, 37 , FIT, PART-TIME dad, metaphysical-spiritual approach to living, positive, goal-oriented, avid reader, passionate about life, loves the outdoors, ISO S/DWF, 30-40, fit, attractive, intelligent, similar path. 1976 TENNIS, ANYONE? Bright, witty, hand some and engaging SWM ISO partner, 35-45, lean, leggy and lissome on the court; lively, literate and lascivious off the court. Post-game at a quiet, sylvan mountain retreat. Can the perfect match end in a love/love tie? 1923 SWM, 24, 5 *7 ", 130 LB S., B-TOWN sin gle life. Have beautiful dog, but he’s not much for conversation, are you? What about mountain biking, snow boarding, German autos, fine food and drink, or live music? 1931_____________ SWCM, 29, SEEKS SCF. I LIVE IN Northeastern VT, enjoy the outdoors, movies, quiet times. I’m busy, but have time to spend with the right person.

122° ______________________________________ MULDER SEEKING SCULLY. Following The Rules courts disaster. I want to believe the truth is out there. Are you? Red hair is an option, not a prerequisite. SWM, 40, *X’, 1932______________ SWM, 20S , ISO SF, 24- 30, FOR friend ship or romance. Like summer nights on Church St., biking, hiking, swim ming. Hoping to have someone to take to the coast this fall for a weekend by the ocean. Athletic, spontaneous 81 educated. What about you? 1936

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august

26,

1998

SEVEN DAYS

page

to respond to a personal ad call I - 9 0 O - 3 7®" 7^27 We’re open 24 hours a day! $1.99 a minute, must be 18 or older.

Aoskinq women DWM, 30 , ENJ0Y5 DANCING, MOVIES, hiking and more, ISO S/DWF, petite to medium build, who’s giving, passion ate, humorous and fun for friendship, maybe more. 1895__________________ NO CHUTZPAH FOR SIN GLE SCEN E. SM, 44, educated, sensitive, extremely hon est, soul searcher, NS, ND, ISO kind, thoughtful, self-actualizing F, fit, with slender to medium build, 3oish—4oish, for romance. 1897____________________ DWM, 44, AND SO MUCH MORE. NY Libra ISO Aquarian or Gemini into: Zen, Tao, sailing, blade, ski, kayak, art, nature, Tom Robbins, Bob Marley and fun in the sun. 1901__________________ I’M 5 ’n " , 28, 210 LB S. WM, GOOD shape, sober, responsible, very hard worker; love the outdoors and having fun; enjoy romantic, relaxing, serene evenings. Seeking similar companion, 25-35, race/creed unimportant. 1906 CAN YOU: FIND TIME TO GO BIKING, hiking, canoeing, golfing, skiing, camp ing? Do you: like music, travel, reading, being outdoors, spending time with friends and family? Are you: a slim, pretty SWPF, 25-35, wanting to meet a tail, attractive, SWPM, 35? Will you: respond to this ad today? 1912 SWM, 38 , SEEKING MATURE, dominant lady to have a unique, erotic relation ship with. Can travel Plattsburgh or Burlington area. 1893________________ IF I COULD RE-WORK THE APLHABET, I’d put ‘i’ next to ‘u’. Tall, blue-eyed SWM, 42, seeks NS SWF to reshape the letters. Remember, fate favors the brave. 1891__________________________ TALL MaWM, LATE 40S , EDUCATED, sense of humor, seeks attractive woman, 25-45, to crew my 25 ft. sail boat on Lake Champlain’ also leisurely dinners in Burlington area. Spouse approves. 1892______________________ ATHLETE, SO LDIER, SCIEN TIST, 29 , 5’7”, 145 lbs. I love the outdoors, Burlington nightlife and cooking/baking. Seeking someone of shorter stature, smaller waistline, and in need of devotion. 1908

I HAVE THE HEART OF DON QUIXOTE, the soul of Cyrano de Bergerac, the charm of Magnum P.l. and the physique of Michael Jordan. All I am missing is you. 1911_______________ DWPM SEEKING PLAYMATE! I’m 40 and enjoy cycling, hiking, camping, fishing, movies, rock & country music and more! Looking for someone with simi lar interests, that’s slim, 30-45, NS, honest, down-to-earth, and isn’t afraid of love and affectionate! 1915 YOUNGER, KIND-HEARTED PROFESSION A L tikes museums, books, antiques, the blues, seeks stylish, intelligent woman for slow-motion romance. How are you with (a) your natural hair color; (b) a tennis racquet; (c) a stick shift? Burlington area. Sorry, smokers! 1916________________________________ WALKING CONTRADICTION: DWM, 36, 200 lbs., liberal-minded, conservative haircut, educated carpenter, depend able, impulsive, nature, Social Distortion LOUD. ISO fit F for fun, LTR, matching tattoos. 1919_______________ TIRED OF BEING ALONE. Sensitive, hon est SWM, 26, likes walks, sunsets, sports, country music, line dancing. ISO attractive, NS SWF, 20-30, with same interests for friendship, possible relationship. 1922____________________ REGGAE FEST, BREAD & PUPPET, camp ing out. Tall, attractive, honest & affec tionate single dad, 30, into outdoors, music and being close, ISO attractive WF with similar interests to have fun w/ and expand each other’s worlds. Let’s meet. 1884 A PERSONAL AD? A LAST RESORT! Are you out there, or should I just give up? Tall PM, late 20s, seeking mature, intelligent, secure PF in the same age category Looking for friendship first; we’il take it from there. 1885 LAST NIGHT I DREAMED I FOUND YOU. Longing for true love is only one belief away. Happy fun-seeker to share the good life! Creative, interesting, enjoy sunlight & laughter, making dreams come true. 25-37. 1852

HAVE YOU TAKEN THE PLUNGE INTO

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thoughtful, centered, self-aware, NS male to share stories, dreams, adventures and any other common

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BOHEMIAN, FUNNY, NATIVE N.Y.ER, Scorpio i960, 5’8”, fiction writer, per former, business owner, sexy (if I do say so myself), ISO wonderfully selfassured, intellectually and artistically active woman who loves life, adven ture, healthy codependence and occa sional silliness. Why the personals? Synchronicity! Letter preferred. 1874 WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO LOVE, hon esty, respect, communication? DWM, 36, looking for uninhibited lady to enjoy the above and adult pleasures. Race, age unimportant. Friends, possible LTR. 1856_______________________ M ID-LIFE TRAVELER W/ DOG & CANOE, somewhat forlorn that Seinfeld’s gone, yet reruns appear. ISO woman, 37-47. w/ adornment from writer, teacher, gardener w/ feet to dance. 1857_________ SWPCM, 35 , SEEKS SW PCF FOR friend ship, maybe more. I love life, music, food, stimulating conversation. I am a baseball 81 basketball fan and love my family and friends. 1858______________ SPWM, 42, 5 ’9", 215 LB S., ENJOYS dancing, camping, movies, dining, cud dling and who knows how to treat and respect a lady. 1863__________________ WITH A HEART OF GOLD. ROMANTIC, engaging, successful, handsome, very fit. Simply single, 42, intelligently seek ing a really special relationship. Must be earthy, attractive w/ many interests, maturity and wit. 1865_______________ SEXISEXISEXI NOW THAT I HAVE YOUR attention & you know I have a sense of humor, I am 35, a 6’4”, slender/athletic, divorced single-parent. Love the outdoors, dining, dancing, movies. Looking for someone to hang out w/ and have fun with, maybe more. ISO tall, slender F w/ sense of humor! 1868

A ssk m q w o m e n

1-900-370-7127 $1.99 min. Must be 18

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31, ISO independent, active,

LOVELY LADY, I W ILL TREAT YOU SW EETLY. Val Kilmar look-a-like, 26, enjoys outdoors, movies, Dave Matthews & slow dancing. ISO slender, attractive, affectionate, 20-26, goddess for friendship and possible LTR. 1849

P E R S O N <TO> P E R S O N

C O lM A S tW J

CURIOUS, PLAYFUL, HONEST SW F,

TRYING AGAIN. DWPM, 42, NS, 6’, 160 lbs. Full plate, empty table. Romantic, spiritual, positive, high energy, parttime dad, normal but not average, percherons, vegetarian. 1869__________ SWM, ARTIST, 26, 5 ’io ", ISO FEMALE to share conversation, hikes, movies, possibly more. Searching for creative type, preferrably to understand artistic craziness...! mean: “originality"! 1839

EM O TIO N S?

love .

p sh A jo n a l 0 #

9 women seeking men1'

ACTIVE? LOVE THE OUTDOORS? INTO hiking, biking, swimmipg, kayaking/ canoeing, climbing, skiing? Want to meet new friends? Gay women’s out door social network forming in the Burlington/Plattsburgh region. Singles/couples. 2009

CARING, LOVING, FRIENDLY, KIND, warm, wonderful women out there to become great friends & maybe more in time. Those wonderful women, I can’t wait to hear from! 2017

A o sk in q m s n

GWM, 40S , 6’, 165 LB S., STRAIGHTacting, muscular, lean, always outdoors hiking, biking, swimming. Educated, traveled, loves hobbies and home life. Kind, gentle, shy & sensitive. Yearns to share life w/ compatible soul. NS/ND. 2010________________________________ 40 ISN'T FATAL GWM, 40, NEW TO VT. Interests include athletics, fine and applied arts, travel, fine food. Seeking similar-minded for fun, friendship, relationship. Dog lover a plus. 2012_______ BIRTHDAY BOY. ISO B(/STRAIGHT-ACT ING WM w/ birthday June 5, 1070-’77. 2003________________________________ GWM, 33 , LAID-BACK, DOG-LOVING, 6’, 170 lbs., bl./br., goatee, workboots and jeans type, workaholic, warm and sense of humor. Seeking cutie with a great personality. Be out, NS, ND, posi tive outlook and love to laugh. Modesty preferred over arrogance. 2015 TIE ME UP, TIE ME DOWN! Submissive Ctrl. VT GWM, 40s, 5’u ”, 190 lbs. Balding, bearded, hairy-chested, light smoker (but won’t if you don’t like it) and drinker (ditto) seeks dominant men of any affectional preference for creative, intense, limit-stretching encounters. All scenes considered. All replies answered. 1947_______________ BiWM, 40, 5 ’7 ”, 150 LB S., SEEKING BiBM for erotic encounters. Does sugar and spice sound good to you? I think I saw you in a video and want to meet you -

1995_______«_____________________

GWM, 25 , ISO MEN WHO ENJOY pho tography and/or hockey, camping, hik ing, traveling, animals. Not interested in relationship or encounters, just con necting with men of similar interests. Burlington & beyond. 1996___________ CENTRAL/SOUTHERN AREA MALE SEEKS Bi/straight male, very discreet, no commitment/relationship. Uniform preferred, but not necessary. Age/looks unimpor tant. I’m 51, 6’, 195 lbs., clean & discreet. 1940__________________________ C T R L VT MaBiM, 38 , ATHLETIC OUTdoorsman with sense of humor, seeks in-shape friend who appreciates great legs and the wilds of VT. 1955________ WM, 30 , 5 ’io ”, 170 LB S., SEARCHING for a fun, attractive man, 27-33. 1 hike, blade, ski & work out. What do you do? If you fit the bill, call. 1978

Dear Lola, To read your col umn, you would think that everyone cut there spends all their time either thinking about sex or having it. My sit uation, much to my chagrin, is ju st the opposite. I continue to be attracted to my part ner, my doctor assures me that I’m healthy and all my parts are in per fect working order. The problem is simply a lack of) interest in love-mak ing. I tear that this atti tude will eventually drive away my partner. What do you recom mend? -Stressed in Stowe Dear Stressed, Jour signature says it all. Stress triggers a fjight-or-fjlight response, shutting down diges tion, immunity and. alas, reproduction. In mice, this response need only last as long as it takes to get cut fjrcm under the hawk’s shadow. We humans, however, need only think about the hawk to experience acid stom ach, cold sores and the anti-libido you describe. Get yourself) out from under your particular hawk's shadow, and your love lifte will selfjresurrect.

J jo la

n o w !

-900-370-7127 $ 1 . 9 9 a minute. Must be 18 or older.

page

SEVEN DAYS

august

26,

1998

to respond to a personal ad call I - 9 O O - 3 7° " 7127 We’re open 2 4 hours a day! $1.99 a minute, must be 18 or older. OLD SPIRIT, YOUNG AT HEART! 28, \jm m

A so k in q m o n

CURIOUS CABIN BOY. WM SEEKING sin gle or couples to fulfill a fantasy. 18, shaggy brown hair, fun, cute, sort of shy, but craving a good time. Glum bum, discreet. 1935__________________ TIRED OF GUYS W/ GAY PRIDE WHO ARE cowards in relationship with a real man. Cute, fit, active, 39, ISO fun-lov ing buddy, any race, 22-42, be healthy & discreet. 1896_____________________ BIM, 5 ’6*, 150 LB S., ISO G/BIM FOR explorations of mind, body &. soul. NS, ND, no HIV or diseases; an open mind w/ healthy, trim body between 25-45. Middlebury area. 1899________________ BiWM, 45, 5 ’8", 150 LB S., SEEKS other Bi/GM for friendship and fun. Must be clean and safe. Burlington area. 1921 DIFFERENT GM, 40, ISO MIDDLE-AGED, short, balding, average guy. I want to meet someone real for a change. 1879 NO ONE EVER REMEMBERS why they’re in the personals! Listen for what’s between us; not like I’ve never heard this one before. Dare ya... Panting gay. 1881

6’4”, 190 lbs., long brown hair, blue eyes, vegetarian, decaf, non-drinking pipe smoker, actor seeks masculine G/BiM, 18-30, w/ similar interests to share Mark Twain, John Irving, laughter & Karma-raderie. 1850_______________ GWM, 26, ISO FUN & GOOD TIM ES, possible LTR. Me: 6’4", br./br., smoker. You: just plain nice. 1851

m TALL, HANDSOME WM, MUSCULAR, well-built, seeks attractive F, any age, who has yet to live out her fantasies. Discretion assured. Let’s talk. 1994 BICURIOUS MaWM SEEKS SECURE, MaCU for discreet, adult encounters. Professional, NS/ND, clean &. healthy. You be same. 1997__________________ BIWMACU SEEKING BIBM. We are very eager, curious, intrigued and excited about meeting you and adding a little color and excitement to our lives. 1934 WILLING TO SERVE. SWM, 40, ISO Fs, any age. Hobbies include nude house cleaning, cooking, nude lawn work, swimming, videos & exhibitionism. Not shy, enjoy performing & having photo taken, very keen to serve. Will try light

l a t t a a a To respond to Letters Only ads: Seal your response in an envelope, write box # on the outside and place in another envelope with $5 for each response. Address to: PERSON TO PERSON c/ o SEVEN DAYS, P.O. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402

WWIF, 5 ’2 ", SW EET, EASY-GOING. BEEN through love & hurt, but still opti mistic, seeking M who tikes to laugh & can see the happiness life has to offer.

Box 333

- '

■__ ___ ;_____ _

MNT. WOMAN, MULTIFARIOUS AS THE earth, free as the wind, undauntable, uninhibited, youthful, healthy, naturally attractive DWF, 49, ND, ISO kindred spirit, shared awareness. Focus: LTR w/ S/DWM, 40+. ND. Box 322____________ VIBRANT, WARM, ADVENTUROUS SW F, 39. The earth is a source of my spiritu ality 81 sustenance; happiest when out doors, gardening, hiking, biking, kayak ing, canoeing. Seeking best friend and partner, 35-45- Box 319_______________ TIRED OF BEING ALONE? ME TOO! Attractive SWF, 49, full-figured, educat ed, ISO WM, 44-60, to share music, dancing, outdoors, quiet evenings, cud dling, LTR. You won’t regret responding. Box 320

domination, or just show it off. 1913 SOMETHING NEW. Attractive SWM seek ing Ms, Fs or CUs, 18-35, for fon- We won’t know if we don’t try. Discretion a must. No mail, please. No strings. Just fun. 1920___________________________ INTIMATE MASSAGE. Incredible mas sage for women any age, size, etc. Enjoy your body as never before in the hands of this skilled, mature, tall, blond M. Take it to an intensity never imagined possible. 1834

IT S A LL RELATIVE. Important to me: honesty, sensitivity, artistic, sense of humor, intelligence, spontaneity, Enya, pasta, daisies, friends, depth. ISO LTR w/ similar NS, 40-50. 2 out of 3 ain’t bad. 5*8”, 13 7 lbs. Box 314___________ LOG CABIN LOVER. Attractive, intelligent professional seeks active, soish friend with open heart and adventurous spirit for dancing, biking, camping and hug ging. Early birds and couch potatoes need not apply. Box 309______________ HOLE IN ONE. Attractive, fit, 40ish DWPF seeks M willing to assist novice golfer. He is over 45, younger than 63, responsible, secure, not stuck in sand traps. A love for life. Box 310

TAKE A HIKE1 SWM, 32 , FIT, SEEKS out door adventure in VT on sunny Saturdays, indoors on rainy ones! Seeks fun, intelligent, attractive, fit, 1840. Let’s get lost in the woods together! Box 332__________________________ DWM, 40S. TALL, BROWN/BLUE, ISO shy, calm, courageous other half. Your aesthetics are gracious and orderly, but original. Smoldering interest in a pri vate, ambitious, skilled man with engaging intellect. Box 327

BOY WITH BIKE. TATTOO UPPER LEFT

back. Came by to fix her fence last week in July. Me: red, white & blue. Stop by any time after 9:30 a.m. You know the address! 1942____________ RED SQUARE, 7/19 & 8/3: Dark-haired beauty dressed in black. 1st time, you were with someone, 2nd time, I was. You were inside, I was outside. Our eyes met. Would like to share silence, bask in your smile. 1975 W EDNESDAYS AT O’S : Several times now, we dance, eyes lock, smile knowingly/questioning, and then writhe on. Let’s viperize, not vaporize, and delve deeper this time. 1977

HANNAFORDS, THURS. 8/6, 7:45 P.M. Gorgeous girt in red dress, we figured out why you carry a lighter... If the great vibes were mutual, please call! 2018_______________________________ JOHN, WE SPOKE BRIEFLY AT VT PUB 81 Brewery, 8/6. We even talked about the personals. I hope you read this one. Call me to talk more. Susan. 1993 BANK STREET, 7/13 . You: blonde sewer worker. Me: attractive black man. We said, hi. Wish we could have talked. Want to? 1985_______________________ SEARCHING FOR *‘1849.'’ IN QUEST OF A lovely lady which he describes as slen der, attractive, affectionate, 20-26, god dess...I think I found one. 1909

i j •

I’LL SHOW YOU MINE IF YOU SHOW ME yours...photo, that is. DWM, mid-40S, tall, fit, lover of nature, travel, the arts and new experiences ISO similar F (age unimportant). Box 324_______________ M SEEKS F. QUIET TIM ES, WALK THE beach, country music?? Nada!! Walk the wild stride! Passionate, romantic, social progressive, futurist desires eco-radical, attractive F, <42. Daring conversation, deep ecology sojourns. Have cool digs. Possible LTR. I’m respectful, committed and not into games! Box 318_________ SWPM, LATE 30S, 5’u " , ATHLETIC, welleducated, wide range of interests including art, literature, hiking, fishing, tennis, ISO fun, attractive, kind-hearted woman, 2 5 -4 0 . Friendship 1st. Box 3 0 6 WM, 40S, SEEKS CRAZY LADY WHO will join me in answering “couples” ads. Discretion, cleanliness assured. Box 3 1 2 MOUNTAIN BIKING, TOURING, CRUISING! Have bicycles to cover it all! Let’s go for a ride! Honest, caring, NS, ND, NA SWM, 3 4 , looking for a LTR! Seeking SF, 2 0 S -3 0 S ! Box 3 0 8 _____________________ UC CHAMPLAIN MAN. Intellectual, yet handy, funny & a trifle romantic. Requires doses of conversation, repar tee, & confident engagement in the vagaries of each other. Outdoorsy. ISO well-educated, rock-solid Green Mtn. woman, 4 5 + & slender. Box 3 0 5

SBF WANTS SF, 40S-60S. IF YOU WANT someone to love you, treasure, laugh, cry, care, let’s dance, walk, talk and be together. NS/NA. Box 331_____________ PLU S-SIZE GWF ISO GF WHO LIKES eat ing out, shopping, cats, kids, hiking, Rollerblading & walks for friendship and possibly more. Box 326__________ CAT ISO SEXY KITTEN TO SHARE MORE than a bowl of milk with. Box 311 SW PF, ADDISON COUNTY, SEEKS nor mal, balanced, intelligent, educated woman who has a dependable profes sion. I am a working, funny, bright, attractive, articulate and creative female. Must like kids. Box 304

MIDLIFE CRISIS AT 30 . NOT TERRIBLY outgoing or gorgeous, but still nice, Burlington GWM, br./bl., 5’n ”, profes sional w/ wacky hours, NS, light drinker, masculine (I think), adventur ous and fun. Likes travelling, photogra phy, art, working out (not a gym bunny) and chilling out. Sincerity, com passion a must. Not into head cases or games. Would love to find a summer soulmate, but will gladly settle for good friendships. Box 321

GWM, 46, 175 LB S., GOOD SHAPE, ISO GWM, 45-55, to hang out, get to know each other, see what happens. Box 313 ISO KINDNESS, INTELLIGENCE, purpose, humor; a man who understands how integrity is better. ISO a partner in building, living, loving, being. Will answer your letter. Box 315

50/50. WM, VERY GOOD HEALTH, would like to meet a person or persons with venture, veracity and exorbitance. Why not explore, you might be surprised. Box 330_____________________________ ATTRACTIVE, INTELLIGENT F, 37 , look ing for male pilot, 40-50, in need of female companionship to split costs of flying in exchange for tutoring. Please have access to a plane. Box 329______ WM, 50 , ATTRACTIVE, BUILT, s ’i o ” , 165 lbs., seeks lady for sexy pen pal and future hot rendezvous. Race, weight, age open. Photo, etc. Box 328________ EVERYONE WELCOME. MaBiWM, 40S, discreet, clean, passionate, seeking adult fun—age, race, weight no prob lem. Ma 81 queen-size W welcome. Bi 81 Bi-curious M looking for safe times. Box 325

4 digit box numbers can be contacted either through voice mail or by letter. 3 digit box numbers can only be contacted by letter. Send letter along w/ $5 to PO Box 1164 , Burlington, VT 05402 LOVE IN CYBERSPACE. POINT YOUR WEB BROWSER TO h t t p ://WWW.SEVENDAYSVT.COM TO SUBM IT YOUR M ESSAGE O N-LINE.

JPahAun Jbo (PaAAjon Yo u r

How to place your FREE personal ad with Person to Person • F i l l o u t t h i s f o r m a n d m a i l i t t o : P e r s o n a l s , P .O . Box t 164, B u r l i n g t o n , V T 05402 o r f a x t o 802.865.1015. P L E A S E C H EC K A P P R O P R IA T E CATEGO RY. YOU W IL L R E C E IV E Y O U R BOX # & P A S S C O D E BY M AIL. ♦ F I R S T ^ 3 0 W O R D S A R E FREE W ITH P E R S O N TO P E R S O N ( 4 5 W O R D S IF F A X E D /S U B M IT T E D O N -L IN E ON T h u r s d a y ), a d d i t i o n a l w o r d s a r e S O < e a c h x 4 w e e k s . • F R E E R E T R IE V A L 24 H O U R S A DAY T H R O U G H T H E P R IV A T E 800 # . (D E T A IL S W IL L B E M A IL ED TO YOU W H E N YOU P LA C E Y O U R A D .) IT ’S S A F E , C O N F ID E N T IA L AN D F U N !

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Administration, English, Mathematics, Psychology,

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Sociology and Studio A rt -

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and have evening

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UNIVERSITY of VERMONT

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