Seven Days, December 16, 1998 by Seven Days

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W hat do y o w is h w a s e a s ie r ? Getting good kosher . corned beef in Burlington, Verm ont. — R o b e rt R esn ik L ib rarian , m u sic ia n B u rlington

— S a m C ooney C lerk, C h e e s e O u tlet B u rlin g to n

Sleeping straight through the night. — E liz a b e th B u n se n

C h a rlo tte

FEAR OF THE TRUTH Even Peter Kurth’s ongoing acute insights into the whole Clinton business [Crank Call] did n’t save me from a growing sense of horror when listening to part of the first day of the Judiciary Committee’s slapstick perfor mance. What frightened me was not so much the claims — for all the world to see and the history books to record — of those we have elected to make our laws that they cannot see the moral differ ence between a president’s using the CIA to impede the FBI’s inves tigation of a political burglary and a president’s misstating (if he did) the date on which he started a sex ual affair. No, what’s really terrifying is the nagging suspicion that many of those making this claim are telling the truth. Help!

ty, including Pamela Polston’s comments in “Rhythm Sc News” [November 25 Sc December 9]. But it’s their concern and caring for justice and fairness I have the highest respect and admiration for, What Dennis and Justin gave to me then was their absolute commitment and unstinting help in seeing my candidacy through. At the time we were all in our mid-twenties, and I was perhaps one of the youngest candidates ever to run for the State Senate... When I decided to run I sat in the back office of Toast for the next several nights crafting a plat form of issues and a slogan that we could turn into signs and bumper stickers. After mixing drinks and sound, Justin would come back in the room each night — usually about three in the morning — and edit, proofread and offer his own ideas. We talked about things like — Justin Joffe the minimum wage, why the envi Burlington ronment and economy needed each other, and how we could A TRIBUTE TO TOAST craft a health care system that With the closing of the door at included access for all... Club Toast at the end of this After that was out of the way, month, it seems an opportune money was needed to get the mes time to note what these grizzled sage out, and again the boys came rock ’n’ roll warriors; meant to one through. Dennis offered the club of their peers. Four years ago I ! throughout the summer and fall contemplated what Was1for frie the on any date that bands could be craziest idea I ever had — a«run organized to play, and all of our for the state Senate in Chittenden peers came through, with bands County. In doing so I came to rely like Rina Bijou, Motel Brown and on the counsel and judgment of one of The Pants’ first gigs at both Dennis and Justin Wygmans. Toast. One of the greatest memo Much has been said and written ries I will always hold is in the wee about their great contributions to hours of the morning when there their substantial music communi- . were only a handful of us left,

along with the staff at Toast, and The Pants came on and ripped up the place and we danced and danced. With the two music benefits at Toast before the fall primary, I was the number-one fundraiser on the Democratic side, giving me instant recognition in the media and the political establishment. Although I went on to lose in the general elec tion, I was forever grateful to Dennis, Justin, the bands and the staff at Toast, without whose help we would never have gotten any where. While the music scene is obvi ously going to suffer a major loss with the absence of Toast, I think the greatest loss is to the commu nity at large...What I tried to do when I ran four years ago was be a vehicle for our generation to voice our concerns in a serious political forum, and not have it be about any one individual. I raise that issue in respect to Dennis and Justin because of their frustration with where they see a generation removed from us going, and the generation ahead of us with their inability to deal with and under stand kids. What we see is a downtown greased for yuppies, and then Gap Kids with a passion to riot based more on the principle of the privi leged being denied the right to party than the underprivileged denied their basic human rights. The Wygmans’ talents for ren ovation, their taste for music, and their understanding for the needs of teenagers are only some of the

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things we lose when the door clos es at the end of this month. But it is their hard work, their dedication to the city of Burlington, and their conscience that has made me most proud to be among their peers. — David Lines Burlington CORRECTION: In our cover story last week, “Exodus?” we misidentified the original owner of Colodny’s mar ket at what is now Little Park. He was Lewis Colodny, and his sons Alex and Meyer also had grocery stores later. Our apologies for the mix-up.

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Off With His Head!

skateboards. Burlap’s becoming quite the lawand-order town, you know.

Oh, come on. Take a little time off from Christmas shopping. It is, after all, the week of the Impeachment of President William Jefferson Clinton. Its history in the making — right up there with Joe McCarthy and the Spanish Inquisition. Go ahead, pinch yourself. See, it is really happening. They always said the revolution would be televised. Larry King, CN N and all the 24-hour news stations have for the past year been pumping Fornigate into the American psyche like research scientists spooning cocaine to laboratory mice. The Political Right and the Christian Coalition 3re getting their chops in big-time. It’s not about sex, dammit. It’s about lying about sex. Liar, liar, pants on fire!

Mayor Who? — Kurt Wright is back working at Kerry’s Kwik Stop. Can’t remember the last time we had a mayoral candidate you could talk politics with while picking up a six-pack and some butts. Used to be in Burlington you thought “Hill Section” when you thought Republican. But Kurt’s one of the new breed of convenience-store Republicans. Blue-collar types. Mayor Peter Clavelle just wants to serve one more measly little term. Now, the poor guy’s got to run a whole big campaign thanks to Kwik Stop Kurt. Poor Mayor Moonie. The question everyone’s asking is whether Kurt Wright can beat Peter Clavelle. The answer is yes. It’s all in the numbers, the demographics of Vermont’s largest city. Politics is ulti mately about mathematics. Six years ago, Republican candidate Peter Brownell came storming out of the New North End with a 1296-vote cushion. He beat Hey, maybe that’s it. Maybe Mayor Moonie better than 2 Henry Hyde and his sanctimo to 1 out there and took the nious Republican storm troop city by more than 700 votes. ers would settle for that? Set Oh, sure, the Progs swept Bill Clinton’s pants on fire and the Old North End, and let him hop around and sizzle a even won the Hill Section. little — and televise it live. BY PETER FREYNE But Brownell carried Ward Stop the presses. Get me 5, too, and Peter Clavelle Geraldo. was soon off to Grenada for rest and reflection. On radio, Rush Limbaugh’s Two years later, Mayor Brownell pulled 200 jaws are flapping in a state of fewer votes out on the Avenue as Democrat perpetual orgasm. And just yes Paul Lafayette played the spoiler. And Clavelle terday on W KDR, the rat pack returned to City Hall, riding the crest of a of right-wing regulars almost whopping 245-vote victory. And remember, drowned in their own spit. campaigning wasn’t Brownell’s strong suit. If he Nothing gets the juices flowing like a hanging. wasn’t so laid-back, he’d probably still be mayor. The callers gleefully linked President Clinton A Democrat candidate is not expected this to O.J. Simpson and serial killer Ted Bundy. time, but there will be a Democrat in the race. The familiar voices of “reason” called for the Kurt’s campaign manager, John Barrows, gives President’s head (or a substitute part of his Wright’s campaign a connection to Burlington’s anatomy) on grounds he’s “spread venereal dis old-time Democratic Party roots. A head-toease,” committed adultery and “assaulted” his head showdown between Clavelle and Wright daughter, Chelsea. It was the chilling sound of cuts Burlap into its two fundamental political a mad, bloodthirsty mob. units: the Progs and the people who can’t stand The bow is bent and drawn; make from the shaft! them. This one promises to be close no matter This isn’t about high crimes and misde who comes out on top. meanors, this is about revenge. Republican The Progs will, no doubt, try to paint Kurt revenge. Payback for Nixon. Payback for the as a conservative Ruth Dwyer-type right civil rights movement. Payback for protesting winger. But unfortunately for them, Kurt’s no the war in Vietnam. For smoking pot. For the extremist. He’s a working stiff who thinks the music. The executioners have a boomer Progs have run the table one time too many. President in their sights who is most assuredly “After nearly 20 years of one-party rule in the | guilty of all those things, and now they’ve got City of Burlington,” he says, “it’s time for a him lying about what his wanger did and when change.” it did it. They’ve taken the Inquisition inside Clavelle has worked hard to get in good the President’s boxers, for crying out loud. But with the movers and shakers — the bankers, be Inside Track unmannerly when the country’s retailers and developers who think they own gone mad? this town. He’s worked to differentiate himself from the radical Progressive image by going extra-lite on the ideological rhetoric and pack aging himself as a “practical” Progressive. Learning from that other Burlingtonian, “Politics,” said Marx, “is the art of looking Howard Dean, Mayor Moonie has moved to for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it the middle. incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.” Unfortunately for Clavelle, the recent flap Thanks, Groucho! over the pay raise for new police chief Alana When the Clinton Inquisition is over, and Ennis has touched a nerve. It isn’t the money one day it will be over, disease, war, famine so much as it is the arrogance. As a campaign and injustice will still be there, waiting. And issue, it’s got legs. And it’s not the only arrow come the next election, let’s throw the bloody in challenger Wright’s quiver. bastards out and cut off their heads! Free Press — Up at the Mary Fanny, 44-yearJust kidding about the heads. old Burlington attorney Sam Press is display Bar Wars — Burlap City Councilor Tom ing his characteristic wit and taking calls from Smith got three Progs, a Democrat and an Governor Howard Dean this week as he recov Independent to go along with him Monday ers from a stroke he suffered a couple weeks night against a cabaret license for Club back. When asked by Ho-Ho if he needed any Extreme Sports, the heir to Club Toast. “We thing, Sam replied, “Yes. Universal health already have too many bars in that block in » care. particular,” said Tom. ’Course, Club Extreme And he’s still reading Seven Days. Good Sports won’t actually add another bar to town, medicine. ® just replace one. Owner Lynn Hepner got her cabaret license on a 8-6 vote. When it came time for the entertainment per mit, Prog Chapin Spencer got real curious about what the waitresses will be wearing. He was con cerned they might be attired in “bikini bottoms.”

Track

O d d , s tra n g e , curiou s and w e ird but true new s item s from e very c o rn e r of the globe

M ensa Reject of the W eek Kevin Johnson was con victed in Chesapeake, Virginia, of trying to obtain money under false pretenses by having a friend drop paint cans on his head at a hardware store until he was knocked unconscious, then trying to sue the store for $250,000. Johnson spent a week in the. hospital recovering from his head injuries.

Breath of Fresh Air Too much deodorant killed Jonathan Capewell, 16, according to a coroner in Manchester, England, who found 10 times the lethal dosage of propane and butane in the teen-ager’s blood after he suffered a heart attack. Noting the boy would spray his whole body with deodor ant at least twice a day, his father Keith Capewell explained, “When we told him he was using too much, he said he just wanted to smell good.”

Big Boxing A promotional event at a New Jersey Wal-Mart store turned into a free-for-all as children and adults trampled and fought each other trying to grab balloons that con

tained cash, gift certificates and other prizes. Brick Township Police Lt. Douglas Kinney said 48 children and several adults suffered bruises, bloody noses and other minor injuries during the melee.

Quick Reversal When the body of Phillip W. Wine Lewis Jr., 40, was found in a pool of blood at his home in Fredericksburg, Virginia, investigators con cluded from drugs, drug para phernalia and other evidence that he had died of a drug overdose, and the medical examiner decided not to both er with an autopsy. Later, a tip from a jail inmate led authori ties to exhume the remains and perform an autopsy. They found four bullet wounds, changed the cause of death to murder and immediately arrested a suspect.

Injudicious Judge Philadelphia judge Richard J. Hodgson dismissed charges that voodoo healer Joy Jadusingh of Philadelphia bilked an elderly invalid of her life savings, more than $90,000, to rid her home of the “murderous cabbages” that she convinced the woman were invading it. “I don’t find

intent to deceive,” the judge declared, “because there’s no way to prove whether the spir its were there or not.”

Forgiving Nature Six years after singer Sinead O ’Connor tore up a picture of Pope John Paul II on NBC’s “Saturday Night Live,” the Vatican gave its approval to a CD of O ’Connor reading some poems by the pope. The pope himself turned up on an Italian late-night television news show when he phoned to express his thanks for a special segment commemorating the 20th anniversary of his papacy. Reuters reported that the pope’s call moved the show’s anchor, Bruno Vespa, to tears.

the rock used to try to break— its rear window. W hen Clifton insisted he didn’t do anything, Chief Russo said the boy replied, “Yes, you did, Daddy. Don’t lie to the police.” The officer took Clifton into cus tody.

the airport’s assistant director of operations, said, adding that although Arce didn’t come close to any'aircraft she did cause the delay of at least two flights.

Hire Education

Workers at the new head quarters of China’s Mission to the United Nations in New York are upset because the front door faces a public restroom in a park, resulting in bad feng shui, the Chinese art of harmonizing architecture with nature. Nimita Parmer, editor of the magazine Feng Shui for Modern Living, warned that the proximity of the lavatory “means any posi tive energy there is will be flushed down the pan.” The city refuses to move the restroom or \ build a wall between the mission building and the park, although the Parks Department has agreed to plant trees and shrubs. Parmer said the trees will alleviate the situation, but recommended that the Chinese also put up a special Pa Kwa mirror to deflect the negative energy.

Some Cambodian school children have to pay for good grades because their teachers are bullying them for money, according to a Phnom Penh newspaper. “If you don’t pay $10 to your teacher, don’t expect to pass your tests,” one pupil said.

Too Proud to Ask for Directions Luz Arce lost

Bad Boy A police officer investigat ing a report of suspicious behavior at a parking garage in Montclair, New Jersey, stopped John Craig Clifton, 38, who was walking with his 5-year-old son. Police Chief Thomas J. Russo said that when the officer questioned Clifton, the boy piped up, “My daddy was trying to break a window on a car.” The child led the officer to the garage, then pointed out a vehicle and

way at Florida’s Tampa International Airport and drove through a closed gate marked with “Do Not Enter” signs, then drove onto a run way. “She was on a runway staring at a 737,” Scott Loper,

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P a r lia m e n t: hat if they gave an “impeachment process” and nobody came? Nobody but the suits, that is, and the pundits who’ve made it all possible. Perjury, abuse of power, obstruction of justice — these are charges that could be brought against half the members of Congress. Perjury is the legal term for lying, a rou tine occurrence on Capitol Hill. The difference is that most congressmen, unlike the President, aren’t faced with an open-ended crimi nal investigation by a sup posedly independent prose cutor. Neither are their “pec cadilloes” relentlessly exam ined by a national media that’s fast running out of ways to distract the public and remains accountable only to its shareholders. Abuse of power? What else are the still unreformed campaign finance laws and the systematic granting of favors, exemptions, tax breaks and bailouts to cor porate and special interests? W hat is Congress’ refusal to approve a Patients’ Bill of Rights to protect consumers against the whims of the HM Os but an obstruction of justice? Please observe that your insurance rates are about to go up again. Having lied about the evils of a single-payer health-care system, which works just fine in every other devel oped country in the world — in fact, people in other countries actually get rich! — the suits are lying again now when they say that insurance rate increases are necessary “to maintain stan dards of care.” We all know this is false. Standards went right out the window when health care was sold down the river to business interests. It may be that the HM Os are losing money hand over fist, but it’s not because health care can’t be made affordable and sufficient. It’s because the needs of sick people are not compatible with the profit motive. Neither have we seen an end to “bureaucra cy,” “long delays” and “restricted choices” under managed care — the very things the insurance indus try’s fictional hysterics, “Harry and Louise,” were so deathly afraid the govern ment would inflict on them, should it wrest control of

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health care from the private sector. I could go on, but what’s the point? On the subject of health care, Americans have solid bone where their brains should be. It’s the same with the “impeach ment process,” about which we’re told over and over that Americans “just don’t care.” W hy don’t they care? Through what abdication of public responsibility have we come to this pass? Will they care later on, when Kenneth Starr’s “investiga-

Is the life of the nation to be completely dis rupted over a mistimed spurt of semen? tion” tactics become stan dard practice in the court room? When mothers are compelled to testify against their children and friends are employed to spy on sus pected “wrongdoers?” When a prosecutor’s office tapes private telephone conversa tions in advance of a court or any other order in a baldfaced plan of entrapment? I’m casting back in memory and history for par allels to this new American reality — prosecution by fiat, political vendetta in the guise of public service. Let’s not bother with the Salem witch trials or the Spanish Inquisition. My thoughts go straight to Nazi Germany, not because I think we re living under a fascist system — yet — but because the Nazi party, like most dicta torships, came to power legally, “democratically,” and in the face of public apathy. Look it up if you don’t believe me. The legacy of Starr’s investigation will have far deeper and more damaging consequences than the apparently insurmountable question of Bill Clinton’s “character,” which, no mat ter how you look at it, is essentially infantile, reflect ing the feeblest characteris tics of the so-called boomer generation — neediness, self-satisfaction, a sensei of entitlement and a despera tion to be liked. W hat a waste of time and money this “crisis” has

been. W hat has it told us about Clinton that we didn’t already know? That he’s weak? That he’s ruthless? That he’s a born prevarica tor, willing to throw his friends, family and subordi nates to the dogs? I leave out the crude sexual details to which we’ve all been sub jected. They’re neither here nor there — nor corroborat ed, for that matter, beyond one frightened woman’s grand jury testimony. Is the life of the nation to be com pletely disrupted over a mistimed spurt of semen? What do the men and women who sat on the House Judiciary Committee during the impeachment proceedings against Richard Nixon think about all this? Personally, I don’t care if Clinton stays or goes. I’d just like to see him driven from office for something more important than Monica Lewinsky and Paula Corbin Jones. It was reassur ing to read the local daily on Sunday and see the front page headline, “Hearings dismay law experts.” I should think they would. The outrageous stretching of the term “high crimes and misdemeanors” by the Republican party sets a dan gerous precedent; apart from its sheer mendacity, consti tutional scholars fear that Congress, in the future, may have “too much power over the president” should this impeachment succeed. “There are so few times that the impeachment process is invoked that if the standard becomes lower this time, and then the next time lowers it a little more, then essentially you are moving toward a parliamentary sys tem,” says Gil Kujovich, a professor of constitutional law at Vermont Law School. I wish it were that simple, but it’s not. Americans are historically and tempera mentally incapable of a par liamentary system. They must have a leader, and they will, one way or the other. I tremble to think what kind of presidents we might get in the wake of Kenneth Starr, when morality and virtue are defined by the state, the end justifies the means, the wicked are pun ished, and corporate oli garchs rule the roost. Somebody tell me — speaking of oligarchs — is Francisco Franco still dead? (Z)

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B y Pa u la R o u tly ven without a star in the east for guidance, the winter solstice serves as a “heads up” from the cosmos. Night outlasts day, by about six hours. The skies are crisp and clear. There is more sustained contact with the heavens — if you can get away from the earthly glow of Christmas lights. Here in the northern hemisphere, the shortest day of the year is an annual astronomi cal event with practical and spiritual implications. Since time immemorial, the dark spot on the solar calendar has not only been a crucial turning point for people who work the land, but for those whose imag inations are engaged in loftier directions. Measure and marvel get equal time in Joanna Rankin’s Introductory Astronomy class at the University of Vermont — a semester o f star-studded study she hopes will inspire her stu dents to at least establish an ongoing “relationship with the

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sky.” Although about half the students will end up as doctors or engineers, the course down plays the quantitative side of astronomy and regularly attracts history, philosophy and women’s studies types. The physics department turns out a fraction of the majors it did 20 years ago, but once in a blue moon an aspiring astronomer still comes her way. Today Rankin is covering pulsars, a subject close to her own heart. For the last three decades, she has been doing world-class research on the rapidly rotating neutron stars scattered throughout our galaxy emit that radio signals at regu lar intervals. Rankin moves around the lecture hall as she explains how pulsars were dis covered 30 years ago by a female graduate student at Cambridge University. She goes into Doppler detail about how the pulsars transmit signals, like beams from a lighthouse, that are picked up here on Earth. Dressed in a Guatemalan frock with a bright Indian scarf

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draped over her shoulder, the only woman in the physics department uses hand gestures, sketches and slides to get through to her students. But she doesn’t coddle them. Using language that is studied and precise, she aims high, directing her comments to the back row of the sloped lecture hall. One foot on a chair, she leans for ward and asks for questions. There should be more. A few students are starting to nod off when she cranks up the tape deck. “Thump, thump, thump.” Through the static comes a reg ular knocking that sounds a lit tle faster than human heartbeat. Rankin explains that we are hearing an audiotape of a pulsar beating loudly against the cos mic crackle of outer space. The effect is not unlike that moment in the movie Contact when the astronomer played by Jodie Foster awakens to the sound of a signal from Vega. At least one pulsar makes a cameo in the film, which Rankin calls a “great point of reference for

people who have no idea where I go to work.” Not to mention the visiting science quarters, where she — and for the film, the carousing Foster — both slept. There are plenty of parallels between Rankin’s life and the movie, which depicts a radio astromer driven by the possibil ity of civilizations beyond Earth. Rankin says the protago nist is based on Jill Tartar, who heads up the Search for ExtraTerrestial Intelligence (S.E.T.I.) with private funding rumored to come from the Sultan of Brunei. Like Tartar, Rankin did her research at Arecibo Observatory in Puerto Rico and frequently visits the Very Large Array radio research center in New Mexico, which was also in the movie. Similarly and some what controversially, her indi vidualistic approach to pulsar research involves “listening” to the cosmos, too. Rankin has the attention of her students now, who are tuned into the sound of pulsars rotating at increasing velocities.

Somehow the audio element makes the abstraction real to the students, like first-time par ents beholding their first ultra sound. Accommodating those who still need a visual, Rankin spins around the room with her arms outstretched — she’s a human pulsar. “It sounds extra terrestial,” one student blurts out. “Exactly,” Rankin says with enthusiasm. “You can under stand how it gets into one’s blood.”

ankin, 56, grew up in the “Sputnik Age.” But she inherited her inter est in astronomy from her father, who worked as an elec trical engineer for the local util ity in a small town in Colorado between Denver and Boulder. Both parents suffered from “stunted aspirations,” as Rankin puts it — her mother never made it past eighth grade, and her father never got back to school after the Depression. “Astronomy was something

he always wanted to pursue,” Rankin says of her father, recall ing many sparkling, clear nights they spent together identifying planets and constellations. “He really liked to answer my ques tions,” she says, even if it meant having to research the answers. Amazingly, he did not encour age her to be an astronomer. “I don’t think he had any idea that was even a possibility,” she sug gests. After a year following in her father’s footsteps at Southern Methodist University, Rankin switched from engi neering to physics. “I wanted to ask the ‘why’ questions, not the ‘how’ questions,” she says. Rankin found her way from physics to astronomy at the University of Iowa. At the time, the department was heavily involved in the space program, due in large part to the presence of James Van Allen, who had instruments on one of the first artificial satellites after Sputnik. A champion of robotics, he spoke out against the manned space program on account of its “sublimated militarism.” Rankin was impressed. Although he agreed to be her advisor, she soon realized his expertise — space physics — was not her primary interest. Her sights were beyond the solar system. “I don’t think I whined, but there came a day when I walked into his office and said, ‘I don’t want to do this spacecraft stuff.’ If he was offended, he didn’t show it. It was through his introduction that I hooked up with some Cornell astronomers in the early days of pulsar research. It was through him that I went to the observatory in Puerto Rico to do my thesis work.” The observatory at Arecibo, which has the largest precision “radio wave bucket” in the world, was the ideal place to study pulsars, the nearest of which is 25 times more distant than the closest star, Alpha Centauri. As a grad student, Rankin got the keys to the place. And over the next 10 years, she split her time between Arecibo and a teaching position at Cornell, measuring the intensity and the patterns of adiation from pulsar stars, as a ay of piecing together “the cirumstances of their mission.” The observatory has also ttracted scientists like Jill ankin recently about a ermont visit. Most scientists oncerned with extra-terrestials elieve they will make contact i^ith earthlings using a radio portion of the spectrum, where wiere is less natural interference.

Rankin got to know the people from S.E.T.I. pretty wdl, describing them as “a little nerdy, probably like the rest of us.” Rankin is less geeky than enigmatic — she alternates chilly silences with outbursts peppered with enthusiatic terms like “absolutely,” “grok” and “gob-smacking.” Rankin does acknowledge a “particular dedication” common among the seekers of little green men — a result of fight ing against the opinion that their work is a waste of precious time and money. “I’m not sure I would put my life’s energy into it,” Rankin says of the ongoing search for intelligent life in the cosmos, “but I’m not dismissive of it, either.” Cinema aside, there are plenty of similarities between the pulsar and S.E.T.I. commu nities, not the least of which is that the radio signals emitted by pulsars were originally thought to be messages from outer space. Radio astronomers in both camps struggle with computer problems that go along with “detecting signals among millions and millions of channels and possibilities,” Rankin says. “They are doing a great deal of automatic assess ment of interference and all sorts of things out there.” The idea is “to only ring the buzzer if something looks really good.” W ithin pulsar circles, Rankin is a bit of a maverick herself. Her “empirical” approach to the rotating stars she studies is not “objective” enough for some. Using equal parts math and intuition, Rankin says she “has a tendency to look at these stars as individ uals,” not as a means to prove existing theories. “To entertain the premise that the universe is, in some sense, alive, is impor tant to my thinking,” she once wrote in an article. “Scientists who look at the stars as if they’re observing mere inani mate objects may miss a great deal.”

ankin attributes the development of her approach to an Indian astrophysicist who is also “dedi cated to a physical science with a rare form of insight that is not first or primarily mathe matical.” Rankin met Radhakrishnan 12 years ago, on the first of many trips to the Raman Research Institute in Bangalore. “He looked at my ‘empirical theory’ work and encouraged me to take it seri ously at a time when no one was,” she explains. “Since that first trip, Rad has certainly been

my most important scientific mentor andguru.’” But Rad gave Rankin more than confidence. He and his wife introduced her to the cul ture and history of India, which has become an endless source of fascination for the blond, blue eyed co-founder of the Friends of Indian Music and Dance in Burlington. Although she has not adopted any of the spiritual beliefs, Rankin speaks with rev erence of “people of great accomplishment and presence” who had lived through the struggle for independence. She wears her Indian interest on her sleeve — literally. Even in cold Vermont winters, Rankin wears traditional cotton pants under her dresses. Saris, she confesses, are an “intoxication.” If the bright scarves and ankle bracelets stand out on campus, however, Rankin’s international “look” also proves to onlookers that astronomers pay less attention to political boundaries than, say, businesspeople. Standing before the big, big picture gives you a slightly different take on things. “It would be ridiculous to think that one could give away all the history we have that is tied to a certain place, or country or cul ture, and become something else. O f course we can’t,” Rankin says. “But it is such a privilege in astronomy to have close friends around the world — to have the vicarious experi ence of being another person, in another place.” Here on Earth, anyway, astronomers are a globe-trotting bunch — low-paid and itiner

working on the opposite coast from her x-ray m achineV It takes a good project pro posal to get time on the instru ments. Access comes free of charge, but with a lot of pres sure: working odd hours, mak ing accurate measurements, transporting the data back safetly on planes. “It is really wearying, getting up in the middle of the night, never being quite rested, having too much telescope time which you feel a moral obligation to use,” Rankin says of a stretch of observing that can keep her in data for years. Aspects of the work are cer tainly lonely. But Rankin enjoys working collaboratively with colleagues around the world. Cutting-edge pulsar research has taken her to Australia, Poland, India, and the former Soviet Union, where she has convened with other scientists on papers, colloquia and con ferences. Rankin says traveling as an independently funded sci entist gives her opportunities not afforded the typical tourist; unlike business trippers, “you are only really representing yourself.” Politics can certainly foul things up, though. Most of the pulsar researchers from the for mer Soviet Union have been forced to drop out of the inter national scientific community because they are simply too poor to attend meetings. “It’s just a tragedy, as far as financ ing is concerned,” Rankin says of the crisis, which inspired her to organize a conference eight years ago in nearby Poland so

is in regular e-mail contact with # num ber o f friends who are struggling to keep up their cal culations, sometimes without heat, water and electricity. “It’s a tough life, and it hasn’t gotten easier,” she says. “I think we may pay big-time for Reagan’s arrogance in thinking the abus es of Soviet communism were worse than the long-term abus es of unfettered capitalism.”

t doesn’t take too much prompting to get Rankin talking about her “anti-mili taristic” bent. Throughout the ’80s, she was deeply involved in local and national efforts to curb nuclear proliferation, including some direct action. Her articles and lectures bore titles like, “Weapons and Technology: Development and Implications of the New Nuclear Arms Race” and “Is Militarism a Feminist Issue?” Along with activists like Dave Dellinger, she helped organize — and got arrested at — the largest and most heated Vermont-based protest against military invention in Central America, known as the Winooski 44. “I came from a staunchly Republican household, so it took me a while to move to the left,” she concedes. But where her anti-nuke action has sub sided somewhat, her feminist agenda has not. Whatever she is teaching, Rankin brings women in — such as Maria Mitchell, who discovered a comet and taught at Vassar before estab lishing her own observatory on

“To entertain the premise th a t the universe is, in some sense, alive, is im portant to my thinking. Scientists who look a t the stars as if they’re observing mere inanimate objects may miss a great deal.” — Joanna Rankin ant, but worldy. A population of 10,000 shares a short list of major instruments and compete for National Science Foundation grants that are harder and harder to get. At any given moment, Rankin is a three-hour plane ride from the nearest useful telescope — imagine an orthopedic surgeon

her Russian friends could attend. “Observatories in Armenia and Georgia couldn’t open their domes because they weren’t sure they would have the electricity to close them again.” The personal suffering of individual scientists has been even harder to bear — Rankin

Nantucket; Jocelyn Bell, whose pulsar discovery was first dis missed, and then co-opted by her graduate advisor, Anthony Hewish. Several years later, Hewish received a Nobel Prize for his work. “She tries to make an effort C on tin ued on next page

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Not only have they mapped a pattern of storms on a city

have had in astronomy, which actually has a proud history rel

sized pulsar and made “sort of a movie of it.” Rankin and Pande

ative to other sciences, in terms of numbers of discoveries” says Nick Cichanowski, a philoso

have proven — with a simple calculation on the back of an

phy major who has taken a number of courses from Rankin, including “Introduc tory Astronomy” and “Women, Science and N ature.” Calling Rankin a “renaissance wom an,” he notes, “She tries to avoid masculine terms when talking

envelope — that pulsars spend most of their energy making radio waves. It goes a long way to explain how the pulsar’s stored rotational energy gets converted into the radio signals we receive from them. The finding also guarantees the duo an audience at the January

about astronomy. She might say

meeting of the American

‘quickly accelerating’ instead of

Astronomical Society.

‘violently exploding.’ It creates

Rankin might say that is

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what science is all about —

Rankin is working on that world view from another angle,

being open to the possibility

too. Just last week, between two

from what was previously

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Vermont that “completely

the broadest, most consistent

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V erm ont film m a ke r D avid G ia n c o la shoots from the hip on the set of his latest action flic k B y E r ik E s c k i l s e n ou pull off Route 30 in Bomoseen on an unsea sonably mild December morning and wheel into the parking lot of the Trak-In steak house. Thirty or so people mill about the lot in Carharts and parkas, snow clinging to their boots. The neighbors dog mon itors the activity through a break in the fence, and the air hums with the sound of a chainsaw. On the surface, the scene is so familiar that you’re surprised not to find Christmas trees for sale. Looking closer, you’re also surprised to discover that what’s stuck to everyone’s feet isn’t really snow. There’s a 10-by-10 foot swath of it coat ing the parking lot next to a box labeled “Snow Biz” — active ingredient, cornstarch. And standing in the middle of the white stuff is actor Stacy Keach. The high-tech weapon in his hands doesn’t look like it was built for deer hunting. Nothing is as it seems here, thanks to film director David

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Giancola. For the second time this year, the Rutland filmmak er is transforming quaint local haunts into terror-fraught scenes of would-be world domi nation. Today the Trak-In is the set of Icebreaker, in which Reach’s Bill must blow away psychotic villain Grieg, played by Evil Dead cult sensation Bruce Campbell, before Grieg fires a stinger missile into a restaurant packed with ski bunnies. One o f the bunnies in peril is Bill’s daughter, Meg, played by newcomer Suzanne Turner. Meg is planning to announce her engagement to ski patrol man Matt, played by Rudy star Sean Astin, as soon as pop and beau rescue the aptly named Killington ski area from the clutches of evil. It’ll be tough. Grieg is mighty pissed. If his planeload of plutonium hadn’t crashed in the nearby woods, he might have been able to blow Continued on next page

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up something bigger — say, a city. And were probably not talking Rutland. And with Icebreaker, were definitely not talking the kind of slice-of-real-Vermont-life movies that generate so much attention around the state. This is an action flick with a capital A — “a blow-up-the-wholeresort-you-name-it-type thing,” as Giancola describes it. But if the words “action” and “Vermont” sound incon gruous to moviegoers, the video trade tells a different tale. Working with L.A.-based pro ducer Peter Beckwith, Giancola and his Edgewood Studios pro duction company have tapped into a strong video market overseas, reaching some 30 countries with a string of fea tures that includes Moving Targets, Diamond Run, Pressure Point and Time Chasers. Owing in part to Edgewood titles’ popularity in Germany, Icebreaker is being financed by the Germany-based Intertainment group. Giancola says he’s got a multi-picture deal in the works with a sepa rate group of backers. As prospects brighten for Edgewood, the projects get big ger. While Icebreaker is very much a low-budget film by industry standards, Giancola says that its $1.2 million price

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tag makes it three times bigger than his earlier projects in terms of budget, shooting schedule — 30 days — and the number of people involved. For the first time, he has two assis tant directors at his side, and he has had to import almost half his cast and crew from beyond our borders to get the job done. “As the production gets bigger, I run out of people,” he says.

much easier than it would be in a more movie-jaded locale. Knowing the lay of the land has other advantages, such as being able to cut good deals with neighbors. According to Giancola, the Killington ski area offered the Icebreaker pro duction great access, particular ly once he agreed to restore the Killington name to the script (it had been changed to

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It may not be Bergman, but it’s paying the bills There is more star power than before, too. Burt Ward gets top billing in Edgewood’s most recent actioner, Moving Targets. That’s Burt Ward as in Robin, the Boy Wonder, from TV’s campy “Batman” series. In Icebreaker, major thespian Stacy Keach, TV ’s Mike Hammer and a known quantity in film and live theater, is the big name. Other casting choices reflect Edgewood’s international audience. According to Giancola, Campbell was chosen to play Grieg because he has stronger name recognition abroad than the closest con tender for the part, singer-actor Meat Loaf. Still, the director has few delusions about his own draw ing power. Over lunch inside theTrak-In, where familiar faces from the Vermont acting scene mingle with the principal cast and walkie-talkie-saddled crew members, he asks Astin to explain why he agreed to act in Icebreaker. “I wanted to go ski ing!” Astin replies without hesi tation. The actor hadn’t even heard of the part, or Giancola, until a couple days before Thanksgiving. “I kept saying, ‘I just hope the script doesn’t suck.’” Evidently, it doesn’t. Astin seems to be having a ball. As the camera is being moved for his closeup, he and Giancola laugh about an earlier incident ' involving the director throwing the actor around a kitchen. “I enjoy the working experience with him,” Astin says later. “It’s not even like working...I have a feeling we could be good friends.” Giancola also seems to be having fun as he strolls around the lot in sneakers, hands in the pockets of his blue jeans. On the whole, the set of Icebreaker is pretty laid-back. Aside from the occasional “Quiet on the set,” which causes the neigh bors to scowl across the fence, no one appears tense. The more you watch, the more the shoot does seem like an excuse for actors to plan a ski trip. O f course, it’s also a rare opportunity for Vermonters to make movies. The result, says Giancola, is that everybody gets excited about Edgewood pro ductions, including the locals. Recruiting for crowd scenes is

“Huntington” at one point). Giancola also worked the localboy angle to secure such actionflick staples as fire trucks, police cars, ambulances and the people who operate them. “I have an edge here,” he says. Yeah, and Lake Champlain has some water in it. Part of the casual atmos phere on the Icebreaker set may also owe something to the absence of what actor John Malkovich called “the stench of Art.” As Astin puts it, “I don’t think [David] has any preten sions about this being the great American awakening film.” Giancola would hardly be offended. “We know we re in the Die Hard genre," he says, “so let’s have fun with it.” For him, that means plenty of pyrotechnics, but also strong characters. “You can have all this shit blowing up, but if you don’t like the people involved, who cares?” Today the needle on the care-o-meter is buried in the red as sure-shot Bill saves the day with his hand-held rocket launcher. The scene goes like this:

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Kaboom! (Long pause) Matt: Nice shot. (Pause) Bill: Nice throw. (Pause) Matt: Thanks. (Pause) Bill: Thanks for saving my daughter. (Pause) Matt: Thanks for saving both of us. (Long pause) Bill: He was a dickhead. It may not be Bergman, but it’s paying the bills — a fact that makes rumors of Edgewood’s departure from action movies a puzzlement to Giancola. While the studio’s multi-picture deal-in-the-works may include a family film, and Giancola’s self-financed kids’ video, Woodhead Saves the Farm, has gained accolades from national parenting organi zations, Icebreaker and its ilk make other project? possible. “Yes, the cream rises to the top,” Giancola says, “but you have to be able to afford the cow in the first place.” He doesn’t make milking that cow sound like such a chore. “This is the best party going. We’re having a blast — literally.” (Z)

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SEVEN DAYS

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december 16, 1998

B y P amela P olston ou won’t hear any Bachhumbugs from Philip Ambrose. That’s because the classics professor at the University of Vermont thinks the 18th-century German com poser is simply “the best.” It’s tall praise for a guy born more than three centuries ago. After all, some of Bach’s contempo raries — Vivaldi, Mozart, Handel, to name a few — and plenty of composers who came after weren’t exactly slackers. But Ambrose’s passion for Johann Sebastian Bach has resulted in a meticulously researched Web site whose very title is imposing: “J.S. Bach: The Texts of the Complete Vocal Works with English Translation and Commentary by Z. Philip Ambrose” (www.uvm.edu/-dassics/faculty/bach/). “People are singing Bach these days in the original lan guage, and the purpose of the translations is to make it clear to vocal groups what they are singing,” Ambrose explains. “The word placement of the translation is exactly the same as in the original text. For example, if you’re singing about joy, it comes in the same musi cal place. My translation trans lates the original text and Bach’s

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setting of that text.” As a musi cian himself — he’s played piano and harpsichord with the UVM Baroque Ensemble for years — Ambrose is uniquely appreciative of the way text and score weave the spell of music. Ambrose notes that Bach wrote in a rhetorical way that expressed the emotions, with “a musical language that was rec ognized in the baroque era — they recognized joy, sadness, theological concepts, so when the word ‘cross’ is in the text, one wants to see that in the translation.” It’s not just the exact word and placement Ambrose has achieved, but translations that are very close to the original meter. Since the September debut of the site — built by Ambrose’s daughter and son-inlaw — singers around the world have taken notice, and permission to download the translations is happily given. Its “repertoire” is all the secular cantatas, the Passions, Motets, Masses and other vocal works, each annotated with Ambrose’s commentary, sources and per formance history — along with, of course, the original language and English transla tions. And it is his intention that translation be a two-way street — as he says in the site’s

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december 16, 1998

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introductory page, “not to leave readers content with the English version but to encour age them to consider the origi nal.” In short, this is not Bach For Dummies, but for scholars and serious classical performers. Still, even more casual fans of Bach’s works — or German majors, for that matter — might enjoy a perusal of the words. They might enjoy, too, visualizing the poets sitting in church pews in the 18th centu ry, right next to the faithful, while the composer set their words to muoic. The massive translations available on “Complete Vocal Works” did not, of course, hap pen overnight. In 1984 Ambrose published a book translating the composer’s can tatas. But rather than produce more translations in print, he opted for cyberspace — espe cially after he discovered a cou ple of years ago that his old computer files were about to become obsolete. “We had to convert everything to Microsoft Word on the Macintosh; that was a huge process, with lots of editing.” From there, the World Wide Web was just a number of keystrokes away. “That’s where my daughter and her husband came in,” Ambrose lauds. While his is not the only Bach site out there, it is the most complete, in terms of the music. Proof that it’s touched the classical world comes in the hundreds of e-mail messages Ambrose receives weekly. “They have the mistaken notion that I know something about Bach,” he says modestly. “I know some things, but there’s too much to know.” Notable users of the site include the Monteverdi Choir and English Baroque Soloists, under the direction of Sir John Eliot Gardiner — the latter group will be performing, in Weimar, Germany, all the sur viving church cantatas of Bach on Christmas day, 1999, com memorating the 250th anniver sary of the composer’s death. The Bach Society of Washington, D.C., will be tap ing the performances, and Boston’s Emmanuel Church will use the works in 35 planned services. This is a big deal, and something that would surely please the prolific, and highly religious, Johann Bach. O f course, all this Bachanalia pleases Ambrose, too — and insures that, even in the new millennium, the world is still going for baroque. ®

Bach lovers, take note: The Vermont Mozart Festival and the Oriana Singers will present one o f the composer’s most inspiring vocal works, B Minor Mass, December 17, 7:30p.m., at the Stoive Community Church, and December 18, 8 p.m., at the First Congregational Church in Burlington. Info, 862-7352.

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and cournichons (tiny sour pick les) at two a.m. Christmas morning when we returned. irst, a full disclosure: So what is this leading up My love of Montreal has a to? I just want you to know basis in more than the that my family, despite their food and multicultural experi French-Canadian roots, did not ences; I actually have Quebec inherit the kind of excessive roots myself. My maternal tastes in Christmas decorations great-grandfather, C. Alexander you may see if you visit Remillard, and his family Montreal this time of year. If moved from Napierville, just you’ve driven to and from the south of Montreal, to Norton city at night during the Mills, Vermont, in the middle of the last century. After a brief Christmas season, you know what I’m talking about: Houses stay — about which my family encrusted with bulbs, wrapped has learned nothing — they so tightly with strings of lights moved to a farming communi that you wonder how they ty in the prairie country of open the doors. Shooting stars Minnesota. There he met my seem to have caught on in the great-grandmother, Antoinette past year, and now there are Plaisance, whose family had scaffolds adjacent to and above also emigrated from Quebec. the houses trailing streamers of They married and produced lights like comet tails. Then lots of children, who produced there are the rotating colored lots of children, one of them spotlights illuminating the moi. An oval-framed photograph y»«x-marble facades of the ranch houses of St-Jean sur of C. Alexander and Antoinette Richelieu. shows a late-middle-aged man, We visited Montreal and balding and lean, with a han dlebar moustache. He’s wearing environs last weekend to get a preview of the season. If any a three-piece suit, but the tie is thing, the ice storm of last crooked and the lapels need pressing. Antoinette is younger; January has only increased the greed for electricity. It’s as her dark hair is piled on her though this year’s lights are head, and her face doesn’t have making a statement against last wrinkles. Both look somber, year’s darkness, a show of defi but not stern; modest, but not ance to the elements and a final plain. checkmate of Hydro-Quebec My mother remembered by its customer-owners. “Don’t Antoinette visiting while she you dare let the power go out was growing up. They called again,” the blinking strings of her “Mimere,” and mother lights seem to say. wanted her grandchildren to As you drive up to call her that, too. She remem Montreal at night, make sure to I bers Mimere, my grandmother scan the side roads and streets and Grammy s sisters speaking in the little towns you pass French whenever they wanted through. Some streets seem to to conceal their conversations have their own competitions from Grampy, who was going. Once you get to German, my mother and her Montreal, there are also some siblings. “We knew they were very choice neighborhoods for talking about us,” she told me, viewing. “because they kept saying les This wonder of electricity enfants this and les enfants and color has become an that.” important part of our annual From Mimere and “C.A.,” Christmas tradition. We just as my great-grandfather was cruise up and down the streets ■ known, we’ve inherited the Christmas tradition of tourtiere, looking for that particular glow. I It’s really fun on Saturday night .1 the classic Quebec meat pie from nine to midnight, when served at Christmas time. In we can tune into WVPR from I our house, the pie was put in Vermont, playing “My Place” M the oven when we left for mid followed by “Music from the night mass on Christmas Eve, Hearts of Space.” If you prefer, I and we ate it with apple sauce

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I’m telling you, there is nothing like this in Vermont — not even in Colchester. bring an old Bing Crosby Christmas tape. I’m telling you, there is nothing like this in Vermont — not even in Colchester. I would suggest that cruis ing for Christmas lights should not be attempted by bah-humbug types, nor by those without a good street map of the city. You have to let yourself get into the spirit of it, revel in the excess, the bad taste, the homage, as it were, to hydro electric power. And whoever is navigating should have a flash light for those marginal neigh borhoods where the Christmas lights themselves aren’t enough to illuminate your map. With those caveats, then, here are some of our favorite neighborhoods for Christmas lights, rated from one to five bulbs.

Westmount, south of Sherbrooke St. You’ll find street after street of decorated red-brick townhouses, and periodically a real eyepopper. This neighborhood is close to downtown, which is a plus, but it’s in English Westmount, which may explain the restraint. Rating: two bulbs. Directions: From downtown, take Maisonneuve headed west. At the intersection with Atwater, you cross over into Westmount. Continue on Maisonneuve for a couple of blocks, and after crossing Greene, starting looking for side streets.

Lasalle and Verdun. These ’burbs are between Montreal proper and the St. Lawrence River. It’s working-

class row houses close to the Montreal line, and then single family homes closer to the river. Both have their own styles and charms. Sometimes you’ll find whole blocks where people have just gone wild, especially the three-story triplexes, where everyone apparently pooled resources to do up the whole front of the building, including balconies, with the same theme — e.g., shooting star, Santa and reindeer, or just a wall of lights. The streets wind, and it’s easy to get turned around, so have a good map. Rating: three bulbs. Directions: From downtown, take Rene Levesque, Maisonneuve or Sherbrooke east to Atwater. Turn left, south, on Atwater, and follow it

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A P LU G FOR A GOOD M A P Good maps of Montreal are avail able free at the InfoTouriste headquar ters on Peel Street, open seven days a week one half-block south of Steon Ste-Catherine, like and 1500 Ste-Cat Ouest Coutu (865 Ste-Cat Est), racks of good maps ne

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St-Jean sur Richelieu. Because you have to go through St-Jean on your way to and from Montreal, you may as well exit Highway 35 and cruise for lights. This is the part of

Quebec most devastated by last year’s ice storm, and they’re coming back in force this sea son. I suggest St-Jean on the east side of the Richelieu River bridge, where a subdivision borders the expressway, provid ing easy on-off access. If early indications bear out, this neigh borhood will provide breath taking displays by Christmas weekend. Rating: potential for four bulbs. Directions: On the way to Montreal, take the first exit from Highway 35 after crossing the Richelieu River bridge, and cross back under the expressway to cruise the neighborhood. If stopping on the return from Montreal, exit from Highway

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L a v a l. If you’re looking for a world-class experience, you’ll have to take the 30 to 40 minute drive to the heart of Laval, north of Montreal. Laval, the home of hockey greats Eric Perrin and Martin St. Louis, is strip development and sprawl

like you’ve never seen. It has bars with nude dancers via satellite, and Chinese buffets that seem as long as a soccer field. But one neighborhood in Laval has my vote for the best Christmas lights in the world. After three years of expedi tions to the far reaches of the Montreal Urban Community — as the region is known— we’ve settled on a particular subdivision where the combina tion ofy««x--palazzo architec ture, curving streets and highvoltage enthusiasm creates a spectacle that leaves even me at a loss for words. Let me just say that one year we were able to turn the car heater off because of the warmth thrown off by

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the lights. We could read the map without the dome light. And we were laughing so hard that we finally had to just park and catch our breath. On some streets, every roofline is traced by lights, along with all the doors, win dows and rainspouts. Trees and bushes bristle with hundreds, if not thousands, of lights. If the house doesn’t have trees and bushes, there may be trees

trip without a street map of Laval. From Montreal, the best way to Laval is the Autoroute des Laurentides, or Route 15, the main highway to Mirabel Airport and the Laurentian Mountains. While there are several ways to get to the 15, we usually take Autoroute Decairie to Autoroute Metropolitain (Route 40), then follow the signs for Mirabel. From the 40, 15 peels off left

made of scaffolding and cov ered with lights. The house itself may have been turned into a Christmas tree, or a comet, or Caesar’s Palace. Any horizontal or vertical line has at least one string of lights attached. I know some people here in Vermont go all out at Christmas, and spend a good part of the year preparing, installing or taking down their vast displays. But in Laval, every house on the street has a good thousand lights, and probably up to 10,000. We think of Laval as the heart of anti-darkness. Rating: five bulbs. Directions: Do not attempt this

to go north. Follow this across the Riviere des Prairies Bridge into Laval. Take the exit for 440 Est, the Laval Autoroute. Continue on 440 until the exit for Boulevard des Laurentides, and exit Nord. Follow this for a mile or two and take a left on Dagenois Est. W ithin two or three blocks, you’ll see the tar get subdivision on your left. Good entrance streets are Monette and Lausanne. La Louiviere, which winds through the subdivision, is a killer. It will take you 20 minutes to drive every street, and 30 to 40 minutes each way from central Montreal. But, hey, Christmas comes just once a year. ®

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After Dark Music Series, Knights of Columbus H a ll, M iddlebury, 3 8 8 -0 2 1 6 . Alley-C ats, 4 1 King S t., B u rl., 6 6 0 -4 3 0 4 . Backstage Pub, 60 Pearl S t., Essex Je t., 8 7 8 -5 4 9 4 . Boony’s, Rt. 2 3 6 , Franklin, 9 3 3 -4 5 6 9 . Borders Books & M usic, 2 9 Church S t., Burlington, 8 6 5 - 2 7 1 1 . Brew ski, Rt. 1 0 8 , Jeffersonville, 6 4 4 -5 4 3 2 . BU Em porium , Bellwood Shpg. Ctr., Colchester, 6 5 8 -4 2 9 2 . B .W .’s Restaurant, 1 Towne M k tp l., Essex Je t., 8 7 9 - 0 7 5 2 . Cactus C afe, 1 Lawson L n ., B u rl., 8 6 2 -6 9 0 0 . Cafe Banditos, M ountain R d ., Jeffersonville, 6 4 4 -8 8 8 4 . Cafe O le, North Com m on, Chelsea, 6 8 5 - 2 1 7 3 . Cafe Swift House, 25 Stewart Lan e, M iddlebury, 3 8 8 -9 9 2 5 . Cambridge Coffee House, Sm ugglers’ Notch Inn, Jeffersonville, 6 4 4 -2 2 3 3 . Charlie O 's, 7 0 M ain S t., M ontpelier, 2 2 3 -6 8 2 0 . Chicken Bone, 4 3 King S t., Burlington, 8 6 4 -9 6 7 4 . Chow! B ella, 28 N . M ain S t., St. A lbans, 5 2 4 -1 4 0 5 . Club M etronom e, 18 8 Main S t., Burlington, 8 6 5 -4 5 6 3 . Club Toast, 16 5 Church, Burlington, 6 6 0 -2 0 8 8 . Cobbw eb, Sandybirch R d ., G eorgia, 5 2 7 - 7 0 0 0 . Diamond Jim ’s G rille, Highgate Com m . Shpg. C tr., S t. A lbans, 5 2 4 -9 2 8 0 . Edgewater Pu b, 3 4 0 Malletts Bay A v e ., Colchester, 8 6 5 -4 2 1 4 . Emerald City, 1 1 4 River S t., M ontpelier, 2 2 3 -7 0 0 7 . Franny O ’s 7 3 3 Queen City P k . R d ., Burlington, 8 6 3 -2 9 0 9 . Gallagher’s, Rt. 10 0 & 1 7 , W aitsfield, 4 9 6 -8 8 0 0 . Giorgio’s Cafe, Tucker Hill Lodge, Rt. 1 7 , W aitsfield, 4 9 6 -3 9 8 3 . Good Times C afe, Hinesburg V illage, Rt. 1 1 6 , 4 8 2 -4 4 4 4 . Greatful Bread, 65 Pearl S t., Essex Je t., 8 7 8 -4 4 6 6 . Ground Round, 16 3 3 W illiston R d ., S . Burlington, 8 6 2 - 1 1 2 2 . Halverson’s, 16 Church S t., Burlington, 6 5 8 -0 2 7 8 . Henry’s , H oliday Inn, 10 6 8 W illiston R d ., S . Burlington, 8 6 3 -6 3 6 1. Higher Ground, 1 M ain S t., W inooski, 6 5 4 -8 8 8 8 . Horn of the M oon C afe, 8 Langdon S t., M ontpelier, 2 2 3 -2 8 9 5 . Ja ke 's , 1 2 3 3 Shelburne R d ., S . Burlington, 6 5 8 -2 2 5 1 . J.P .’s Pub, 13 9 M ain S t., Burlington, 6 5 8 -6 3 8 9 . LaBrioche, 89 M ain S t., M ontpelier, 2 2 9 -0 4 4 3 . Last Chance S aloon, 1 4 7 M ain , Burlington, 8 6 2 -5 1 5 9 . Leunig’s, 1 1 5 Church S t., Burlington, 8 6 3 -3 7 5 9 . Live Art at the Barre Opera House, Barre, (schedule) 8 8 3 -9 3 0 7 ; (tickets) 4 7 6 -8 1 8 8 . M ad M ountain Tavern, Rt. 1 0 0 , W aitsfield, 4 9 6 -2 5 6 2 . M ain St. Bar & G rill, 1 1 8 M ain S t., M ontpelier, 2 2 3 -3 1 8 8 . M anhattan P iz z a , 1 6 7 M ain S t., Burlington, 6 5 8 - 6 7 7 6 . M onopoles, 7 Protection A v e ., Plattsburgh, 5 1 8 -5 6 3 -2 2 2 2 . The M ountain Roadhouse, 1 6 7 7 M ountain R d ., S tow e, 2 5 3 -2 8 0 0 . N ectar's, 18 8 M ain S t., Burlington, 6 5 8 - 4 7 7 1 . The Night Spot Ou tback, Killington R d ., Killington, 4 2 2 -9 8 8 5 13 5 Pearl S t., Burlington, 8 6 3 -2 3 4 3 . Pickle Barrel, Killington R d ., Killington, 4 2 2 -3 0 3 5 . Radisson H otel, 6 0 Battery S t., Burlington, 6 5 8 -6 5 0 0 . Red Square, 136 Church S t., Burlington, 8 5 9 -8 9 0 9 . Rhom bus, 18 6 College S t., Burlington, 8 6 5 -3 1 4 4 . Ripton Community Coffee House, Rt. 1 2 5 , 3 8 8 -9 7 8 2 . Ruben Jam es, 159 M ain S t., Burlington, 8 6 4 -0 7 4 4 . Rude D og, 1 4 Green S t., Vergennes, 8 7 7 -2 0 3 4 . Rusty N a il, M ountain R d ., Stow e, 2 5 3 -6 2 4 5 . Sai-Gon C afe, 13 3 Bank S t., Burlington, 8 6 3 -5 6 3 7 . Slam m er, Rt. 7 , M ilton, 8 9 3 -3 4 5 4 . Something C ool, 22 Brinkerhoff S t., Plattsburgh, N Y , 5 1 8 -5 6 3 -8 6 3 9 . Sw any’s , 2 1 5 M ain S t., Vergennes, 8 7 7 - 3 6 6 7 . Sw eetw aters, 1 1 8 Church S t., Burlington, 8 6 4 -9 8 0 0 . The Tavern at the Inn at Ess e x, Essex Je t., 8 7 8 - 1 1 0 0 . Thirsty Turtle, 1 S . M ain S t., W aterbury, 2 4 4 -5 2 2 3 . Three M ountain Lodge, Rt. 1 0 8 , Jeffersonville, 6 4 4 -5 7 3 6 . Thrush Tavern, 1 0 7 State S t., M ontpelier, 2 2 3 -2 0 3 0 . Toadstool H arry's, Rt. 4 , Killington, 4 2 2 -5 0 1 9 . Trackside Tavern, 18 Malletts Bay A v e ., W inoo ski, 6 5 5 -9 5 4 2 . Tuckaw ay’s, Sheraton, 8 7 0 W illiston R d ., S . Burlington, 8 6 5 -6 6 0 0 . Valley Players Theater, Rt. 1 0 0 , W aitsfield, 4 9 6 -3 4 0 9 . Vermont Pub & Brew ery, 1 4 4 C ollege, Burlington, 8 6 5 -0 5 0 0 . Villa Tragara, Rt. 1 0 0 , W aterbury C tr., 2 4 4 -5 2 8 8 . W indjam m er, 1 0 7 6 W illiston R d ., S . Burlington, 8 6 2 -6 5 8 5 . W obbly Barn, Killington R d ., Killington, 4 2 2 -3 3 9 2 .

— that is, the musical kind that throws together 10 Noo-Yawkers with back grounds in hip-hop, jazz, funk, AfroCuban, r&b and noodle-rock and ends up with both unity and individuality, and believes in the pursuit of happiness and diversity and the indomitable right to a good time. It’s an urban pan-groove, peo ple. Collect them all! At Emerald City this Friday, with Stand Up Eight.

RIG H TEO U S ROOTS

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do with that other kind of influence. No, mon, this here's the raddest bunch of Rastas from New York (by way of the Caribbean), and their music is rankin’ reggae — okay, with a little hip-hop, funk and calypso on the side. U.N.I. be playin’ at Metronome this Friday.

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W EDNESDAY ELLEN POW ELL & JOE DAVIDIAN (jazz), Leunig’s, 8 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, 135 Pearl, 9:30 p.m. NC. DISCO FUNK (DJs John Demus & Tim Diaz), Ruben James, 11 p.m. NC. ABAIR BROS, (rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. LIFE IS ELSEW H ERE (rock), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. COSMIC LOUNGE (DJ Mike Spearz), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $1/4. METRO MASSIVE (hip-hop/dancehall DJ), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. CHRIS KLEEM AN (acoustic blues), Good Times Cafe, 7:30 p.m. Donations. OLD JAW BONE, THE NETW ORK, RED BEANS AND RICE (soul-reggae; r&b/Latin; jump blues), Higher Ground, 9:30 p.m. $4/6. SAYLYN (roots reggae), Emerald City Nightclub, 9:30 p.m. $3/5. TNT (DJ &c karaoke), Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Cambridge Coffee House, Smuggler’s Notch Inn, 7 p.m. Donations.

THURSDAY JODY ALBRIGHT (jazz vocalist), Leunig’s, 8 p.m. NC.

KIP M EAKER & KEITH HUBACHER (acoustic), Sweetwaters, 8:30 p.m. NC.

MARK PEKAR (visionary songwriter), Rhombus, 9 p.m. $3-6.

CONSTRUCTION JOE (alt-country), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. BLOOZOTOM Y (jump blues; CD release party), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC.

CHROME COWBOYS HOLIDAY DANCE (vintage country/swing), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. NC.

INVISIBLE JET, JACK DRAG, THE HALOGENS (alt-rock), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $4/6.

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FLOOD (jazz), Manhattan Pizza, 10 p.m. NC. RIGHT IDEA (rock), Vermont Pub &c Brewery, 9:30 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE W/D. DAVIS, Cactus Cafe, 9 p.m. NC. ACOUSTIC JAM W/HANNIBAL HILL (rock), Alley Cats, 9 p.m. NC.

LOCOMOTION (DJ Little Martin/’70s disco), 135 Pearl, 10 p.m. NC.

ONION RIVER JA Z Z BAND (Dixieland), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 7 p.m. NC. GUY C0LASACC0 (singer-songwriter), Jake’s, 6:30 p.m. NC. SAND BLIZZARD (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. WEDDING BAND PARTY (sneak pre view of Vermont-made film, and band), Higher Ground, 9 p.m. $5. KARAOKE, Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. DJ & KARAOKE, Thirsty Turtle, 9:30 p.m. NC. OPEN M IKE, Gallagher’s, 8:30 p.m. $4/7. MARK LEGRAND (Americana), Thrush Tavern, 7:30 p.m. NC.

CURRENTLY N AM ELES S , ORGANIC GROOVE FARMERS (groove rock; backporch folkgrass), Emerald City Nightclub, 9:30 p.m. $5/8. KARAOKE, Swany’s, 9 p.m. NC. JIGGLE TH E HANDLE (groove rock), Wobbly Barn, 8:30 p.m. $6.

CLYDE STATS (jazz), Windjammer, 5:30 p.m. NC.

JOE CAPPS (jazz), Sai-Gon Cafe, 7 p.m. NC.

BOOTLESS & UNHORSED (Irish), Last Chance Saloon, 7:30 p.m. NC. KATE BARCLAY (singer-songwriter), Borders, 8 p.m. NC. MARGO DAY (goth-ethereal), Rhombus, 8 p.m. $4-7. LES RIOS (jammin’ acoustic), Sweetwaters, 8:30 p.m. NC. PERRY NUNN (acoustic), Ruben James, 5 p.m. NC, followed by DJ NIGHT, 10 p.m. NC. BL00Z0T0M Y (jump blues; CD release party), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. EVOLUTION (DJ Craig Mitchell), 135 Pearl, 10 p.m. $4/5. UNDER N AZA R EN E IN FLU EN CE (reg-

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ZO LA TURN , RED TELEPH O N E, H ELEN KELLER MUSIC (alt-rock), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $4/6. MR. FRENCH (blues-rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. THE CHAM ELEONS (r&b/Latin), Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9:30 p.m. NC. RUSS & CO. (rock), Alley Cats, 9 p.m. NC. COMEDY ZO N E (stand-up), Radisson Hotel, 8 & 10 p.m. $8. EM PTY POCKETS (rock), Franny O ’s, 9 p.m. NC. BLUE JAY W AY (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC. BLUE VOODOO (blues-rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. $2. DUB VERSION (dancchall, reggae, hiphop DJs), Higher Ground, 9:30 p.m. $ 6/ 8. JOHN CASSEL (jazz piano), Tavern at

Inn at Essex, 8 p.m. NC. RUN FOR COVER (rock), Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. DANCIN’ DEAN (country dance & instruction), Cobbwebb, 7:30 p.m. $5. LIVE JA Z Z, Diamond Jim’s Grille, 7:30 p.m. NC. TNT DJ, Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. NC. HOLIDAY VARIETY SHOW, Villa Tragara, 6:30 p.m. $7.50. ARTFUL DODGER (classic rock), Gallagher’s, 9 p.m. $4/7. TH E ROCKETT BAND (jazz-groove), Mad Mountain Tavern, 9 p.m. $4.

LAS T C ALLS

Telephone and Helen Keller Music. JEREM Y BORNE (Christmas/classical), Borders, 2 p.m. NC. DAVE JARVIS (pop-rock), Rasputin’s, 8 p.m. NC. MR. FRENCH (blues-rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. FACT0RIA (DJ Little Martin), 135 Pearl, 9 p.m. $4/5. DJ NIGHT (hip-hop/r&b DJs), Ruben James, 9 p.m. NC. RED BEANS & RICE (jump blues), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. DJ DANCE PARTY (Melo Grant & Butch; deep house), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $4/6. SWING DANCE LESSONS, Club Metronome, from 6 p.m. $8, followed by RETR0N0ME (DJ Craig Mitchell), 10 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, J.P. s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. HIP-HOP NIGHT, Ruben James, 11 p.m. NC. BUCK & THE BLACK CATS (rockabil-

Nightclub, 9 p.m. $14/16. KIP M EAKER BAND (blues), Mountain Roadhouse, 9 p.m. NC. JUKEBOX HEROES (rock), Rude Dog Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. TH E MIGHTY CHIHUAHUAS (rock), Nightspot Outback, 4:30 p.m. $3, fol lowed by TH E SPIDERS (classic rock), 9:15 p.m. $7. LIVE MUSIC (rock), Toadstool Harry’s, 9 p.m. $3. H EAVY M ETAL HORNS (funk/r&b), Wobbly Barn, 8:30 p.m. $7.

SATURDAY ELIJA, OLD JAW BONE (orig. folk, world/roots), Rhombus, 8 p.m. $3-6.

l i s t i n gs

The line forms here: Of bands, that is, who are all nostalgic and ready to kick some sonic butt at

their final show at Toast, which closes January 1. It’s Zola Turn’s, urn, turn — this Friday. The girls go-go, with Red

GROOVE COLLECTIVE, STAND UP EIGHT (jazz-hop), Emerald City

FRIDAY

RUN FOR COVER (rock), Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. LIVE MUSIC (country-rock; round & square dancing), Cobbweb, 8:30 p.m. $7/12. JUKEBOX HEROES (rock), Rude Dog Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. DEAD HIPPY (groove rock), Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. $4/5. BABAL00, DAD (punk mambo), Emerald City Nightclub, 9 p.m. $5/8. INVISIBLE JET (alt-rock), Mad Mountain Tavern, 9 p.m. $4. TH E DETONATORS (r&b/blues), Gallagher’s, 9 p.m. $4/7. THE NATURALS (rock), Rusty Nail, 8:30 p.m. $4/5.

ly) Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9:30 p.m. NC. SOLOMONIC SOUND SYSTEM (reggae DJ), Chicken Bone, 10 p.m. $1. COMEDY ZO N E (stand-up), Radisson Hotel, 8 & 10 p.m. $8. GUY COLASACC0 (singer-songwriter), Jake’s, 6:30 p.m. NC. BLUE JAY W AY (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC. HIGHLAND W EAVERS (Irish), Tuckaway’s, Sheraton Hotel, 9 p.m. NC. BLUE VOODOO (blues-rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. $2. PICTURE THIS (jazz), Tavern at Inn at Essex, 8 p.m. NC. ADAMS & EVE (rock), Backstage Pub, 8:30 p.m. $2.

www.s evendaysvt.com

w w w . B

I G H

continued on page 29

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HOWDY, PODNER Talk about multiple personalities: The Pulse (92.7 FM)

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— initially an alternative station, then all-sports talk — has just switched again. As o f Monday morning, it’s country! Yee-haw. Looks like some competition in the genre ruled locally by the mighty W OKO. That is, if the Pulse doesn’t throw in its Stetson six months down the road and go for Christian rock. Wonder if they’ve considered all-polka? By the way, if you are a serious country fan — and a long-range planner — form a big strong line for those Brooks & Dunn tix, which go on sale this Thursday for their show at the ’99 Champlain Valley Fair. Sponsored by (ahem) W O KO .

FRIDAY, DECEMBER 18 $6 21+/$818+ DJs SPIN DANCEHALL/REGGAE/HIP-HOP

WITH THIS RING... Pictures may say a thousand words, but this one is not saying Nectar RorriS has a new dress code behind those Fryolators. Au contraire, the get-up is courtesy o f the longawaited Wedding Band, playing this Thursday at Hoyts Nickelodeon (sorry, invitation only), followed by a party with the movie and band at Higher Ground (public welcome). The Vermont-made, California-edited film by hometown musician Martin Guigui features some “real” actors — Deborah Gibson and Dom DeLuise — and whatcha might call local color. A

DUB VERSION LIVE PERFORMANCES BY COPPERTOP, SLINKY & THE RETRIBUTION CREW • SPECIAL GUEST DJs INFINITE, DUBEE & EL-V SATURDAY, DECEMBER 19

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dark comedy about an outrageous nuptial reception, the film draws inspi ration, and anecdotes, from Guigui’s 20-year history o f playing weddings — and, one suspects, a fair amount o f creative license. In any case, we can finally discover whether this is the kind o f wedding that makes you cry or dance in the aisles.

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 26 S5 AT DOOR

CHROM E COW BOYS STARLINE RHYTHM BOYS

Vermont-based folksinger who’s pretty itinerant himself. Watching the show with his wife, not expecting a clip from the hobo convention he attended last summer (which he wrote about in a recent issue o f Good Citizen), Palieri was stunned to see him self strumming a blues tune on his banjo with a guitar-pickin’ hobo who calls him self “Liberty Justice. Palieri’s presence there came at the invitation o f Utah Phillips, a regular at the annual hobo convention in Britt, Iowa — the oldest convention in the United States, Palieri informs. Seems it’s been going there since 1900 — the townsfolk apparently have a soft spot for the freight-train hoppers who frequent the nearby railyards. Got a foodshelf type o f place for them called “H obo Jungle,” not to mention a hobo graveyard and a hobo museum. At the convention a King and Queen o f the Hobos is crowned — the King has an unofficial but respected role as an arbiter o f disputes and problem solver amongst his nomadic “subjects.” But not all is happy in hoboland; an unfortunate violent element has been growing in recent years, says Palieri — a cultish gang, called “Future Freight Train Riders o f America,” that boasts o f conquests with knives and guns. These bad apples may end up spoiling the convention for everyone else. “It’s very scary,” Palieri laments. Makes touring in a van look pretty good — no

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CLOSED FOR VACATION SATURDAY, JANUARY 16 S12 ADVANCE S14 DAY OF SHOW

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RONNIE EA RL &THE BROADCASTERS KIP MEAKER BLUES BAND FRIDAY, JANUARY 22 S16 ADVANCE S18 DAY OF SHOW 104.7 THE POINT WELCOMES

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WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 27 S12 ADVANCE S14 DAY OF SHOW

CHARLIE HUNTER WITH FEATURED GUEST

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THE S U P SATURDAY, JANUARY 30 S721+ $918+

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T A M M Y F LE T C H E R A N D T H E D IS C IP LES , LIVE A T THE t o

TRAMP TOWN If you caught the “2 0 /2 0 ” segment Sunday called “Dangerous H obos,” you probably spotted our own Rik Pslieri, the

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 27 S3 AT DOOR

U fC l

SINGLE TRACKS Rik Palieri’s other news (he rules r&n this week) is that the winter edition o f The Z-Files, a British magazine for fans o f Zemaitis custom guitars, includes a feature on him self and England’s Gareth Hedges — the acoustic artist pals recently played together on both sides o f the pond, and both own guitars from the company that has more famously serviced the likes o f George Harrison, Paul, McCartney, Bob Dylan, Ron Wood, et al. . . . N ot everyone plays rheir first gig in the Big Apple and takes a big bite. But, reports our N ew York correspondent Neil Cleary, Burlington’s Construction Joe played an ass-whuppin’ set at the prestigious Mercury Lounge” a few Saturdays back, and actually had an audience o f 100 or so. G ood show . . . Burlington popsrer Dave Jarvis is the special guest on “Buzz Homebrew” (99.9 FM) this Sunday, airing a bit o f his latest EP, D avem an ia. . . “Homebrew” host Nicole SaltUS reports she’s doing a special Toast tribute show on January 17, and asks anyone with fond or funny memories o f the club to call them in on her voicemail: 860-2440, ext. 230 . . . There are leftovers from last year’s Feast o f Fools compilation — pick up the Magic Hat-sponsored benefit disc — a perfect stocking-stuffer! — in local outlets, and do a good deed for Burlington City Arts . . . Jim Lockridge is com piling the sequel to his Sonic Tonic C D , with the action-movie-esque title o f Tonic Two: Core Breach Burlington. Expected tracks so far include Zola Turn, Chainsaws & Children, The Implants, DJ Psychotrope and more, more, more! If you wanna become a sponsor o f T 2 (that means help pay for it), call Jim at 865-1144 . . . The latest evidence dispelling the rumor that the Burlington scene is moribund: The Halogens, formed when pieces o f Chin Ho!, Starlight Conspiracy and Rocketsled collided to form a newly optimistic, self-propelling planet. Jason Dunn, Shawn Flanigan, Casey Rea and Eric Jagentenfl (not a typo) shake down indie-ful rock this Thursday at Toast and Sunday at the Metronome Matinee . . . ®

B and nam e of the w e e k :

TV. . , - ,

v * -

7 ■

B litze n k rie g

M AD RIVER M U SIC FESTIVAL (self-released CD) — I have to admit I’ve never understood why musicians do live recordings. Unevenly miked, they never sound as good as studio productions, and you have to put up with crowd sounds, exuberant announcers, feedback, and the occa sional misstep from even the best bands. They also tend to stretch out songs, sometimes unbearably, which may be all well and good when you’re part of a happy, grooving crowd, but if you’re just sitting in a chair in the living room, well...let’s just say I’m not enamored of excessive jamming. That said, I concede that if you’re a big fan of said band, you probably forgive them anything, and grow as fond of the recording’s quirks as the mole on your lover’s tush, or whatever. Maybe you can even get off your fat, uh, chair, and pretend you’re at the festival and it’s summer and you’re as carefree as a firefly. Okay, that’s what happened to me listening to Tammy’s ass-shakin’ ren dition of “Magic Bus.” In fact, by the Janis Joplin-worthy third song (“Heaven,” written by guitarist Greg Matses), I began to anticipate that the disc’s seven songs were going to feel downright miserly. Turns out that the power of Tammy’s voice, and the fluid funkiness of the Disciples, and the damn decent on-site recording by Noteworthy Studios at the Waitsfield fest last August, conspire to make a mighty fine listen over all. Yup, even the lovely, gospelly “Canyons,” by Tammy and guitarist Dave Nerbak, doesn’t cool this unit down. The ska-ful “Bum” (another Matses composition) is a happy romp deserving of a hefty horn section, and the Stacy Starkweather-penned closer, “Give It Grace,” while a bit noodly for my tastes, is salvaged by those virtuosic vocals as big as the Mad River Valley itself. Even Barry Blinn’s drum solo is an impressive interlude. O f course, in the last song we have band member intro ductions, crowd cheers, etc., as the band wraps its set with a rave-up ending. By this time, I’m back to praying these Disciples will get their act together — in a studio — soon. —

PameD Polston

PraxAx r i h / w - i a ubv j Twanaer™ , » v *'

sOUnd AdviCe continued from page 2 7

Patent Pending Rhythm hand exercise

Belt it On - Groove on the Move

Great Gift!

JOEY LEO NE TRIO (blues), Mountain Roadhouse, 9 p.m. NC. THE MIGHTY CHIHUAHUAS (rock), Nightspot Outback, 4:30 p.m. $3, followed by THE SPIDERS (classic rock), 9:15 p.m. $7. RICK DANKO (former member of The Band), Toadstool Harry’s, 9 p.m. $ 10.

Git/Elec $40 Bass/5 $48

Air guitar, student or pro It’s all about rhythm to wear on the go.

SUNDAY

BURLINGTON FUTOM COMPANY

SAM UEL GUARNACCIA (classical guitar), Windjammer, 10:30 a.m. NC. ARS MUSICA (classical; members of VYO), Leunig’s, 10: 30 a.m. NC. BL00Z0T0MY (jump blues; Christmas party), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC.

Bass/4 $45 Add $10 for Amp-Ready

www.twanger.com H a lf price n o w a t th e fo llo w in g lo catio n s :

Advance Music, Vermont Folk Instruments, and Calliope in Burlington. Play It Again Sam, Montpelier

VINYL DESTINATION

$29

THE HALOGENS, BATTERSHELL (alt-rock), Club Metronome, 4:30 p.m. $5. RUSS & CO. (rock), Chicken Bone, 10 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, Edgewater Pub, 7 p.m. NC. BLUE FOX (acoustic blues), La Brioche, 11 a.m. NC. LIVE MUSIC (acoustic), Main Street Bar &c Grill, 11 a.m. NC. HOLIDAY VARIETY SHOW, Villa Tragara, 6:30 p.m. $7.50. | JOEY LEO NE DUO (Delta blues), it | Mountain Roadhouse, 7:30 p.m.

I NC

RICK REDINGT0N (rock), Nightspot 1 Outback, 4:30 p.m. $3, followed by HALF-STEP (Dead/orig.), 9:15 p.m. 1 $7. ' -

MONDAY ALLEY CATS JAM W/NERBAK BROS, (rock), Alley Cats, 9 p.m. NC.

YANKEE POT ROAST (folk-rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. ORANGE FACTORY (acid soul/funk), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. METRO SWING (dance lessons), Club Metronome, from 7 p.m., $8, followed by DANCE PARTY, 10 p.m. NC. HOLIDAY VARIETY SHOW, Villa Tragara, 6:30 p.m. $7.50.

We’re more than a Futon Company.

DECORATE FOR THE HOLIDAYS! 862-5056

MICHELE LALIBERTE (French & German cabaret), Leunig’s, 8 p.m. NC. MARTIN & M ITCHELL (soul DJs), Club Metronome, 10 p.m. NC. WIDE WAIL (alt-rock) Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC.

Open Sundays

YELLOW/CHECKER TAXI Open 24 hours 7 days a week!

Van Service Available Group Rates for Large Parties

TUESDAY OPEN STAGE (acoustic), Burlington Coffeehouse at Rhombus, 8 p.m. $3-6.

388 Pine Street

! "

s i oo o' ff .

2 p e r s o n s or m o r e

CHAD (rock), Nectar’s, 9:15 p.m. NC.

BASHMENT (reggae/dancehall DJ), Ruben James, 11 p.m. NC. FLASHBACK (’70s-’90s DJ), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $5. RUSS & CO. (rock), J.P.’s Pub, 9:30 p.m. NC.

802 864-7411 802 864-7474 -

802 862-3300 802 862-3400 -

ROSEBUD FILM SERIES (The Nightmare Before Christmas, The Grinch That Stole Christmas), Higher Ground, 8 & 10:30 p.m. NC.

204 North Street • Burlington, VT 05401 VISA

P ijIftsrSraLat)

A special h o lid a y s h o p p in g event at our M id d le b u r y G a lle ry

December 17th, 6-9 p.m. E n jo y m usical e n te r ta in m e n t, h o lid a y tre a ts , a n d b e v e ra g e s fr o m O t t e r C re e k B re w in g . V E R M O N T

Mi l l

STATE

Street

C R A F T

• Middlebury

C E NT E R

• 8 0 2 . 3 8 8 . 3 I 77

NEW GROUP THEATRE OF VERMONT Seeks PRODUCER’S ASSISTANT for “MEMOIR” to be staged at Vergennes Opera House Feb. 19th & 20th and other VT locations. I ASST TO DIRECTOR and 1 STAGE MGR for CLARENCE DARROW to be staged mid-winter. Seeking ORIGINAL one-act plays and long and short scenes, the more adventurous — the better! (10-20 minutes) for spring/summer production. AUD ITIO N S NOW ! Understudies for lead roles in “M EM OIR.” one male/one female. For info: 1-802-877-3646 or 1-802-862-4223.

NEW GROUP THEATRE OF VERMONT A Unique Restaurant and Small Bar on the corner of Church and Main Streets in Downtown Burlington

Celebrate the Holidays —

Celebration Libations at Smokejacks! Free Order any

by erik esckilsen

sparkling w in e certificate for good through n

Hours: Lunch Tuesdays-Saturday 11:30-5:30 Dinner Monday-Thursday 5:30-10:00 Friday 0 Saturdays 5:30-10:30 156 Church Street, Burlington, TEL: 802-658-1119 TEL: 802-658-1119 FAX: 802-658-0730

O F F IC E S

F or H o lis t ic H e a lth P R A C T IT IO N E R S ( 802 )

Holiday Special! W e ’ u * m a d e t h is t h e b e s t t im e to c o n n e c t \ o n . ( a ll f o r d e t a ils . 8 6 3 - 4 3 0 8

862-0836 Pathways to Well Being

168 B attery St. B urlington, VT

Seven Days recommends you confirm all calendar events, as times and dates may change after the paper is printed.

W ednesday & Sports Bar in Central ta io n l

music

December 18ti :k fro m W aterb ury

(18 And Up Night)

)J & Karaoke at 7 ^ 0

Exit 10, 1-8 0 ,1 Sa. Main Street* Waterbary, VT • (802) 244-5228 • Open Dally 4-dese

page 30

SEVEN DAYS

december 16,1998

TREBLE MAKERS: Barbershop har monies accompany the book browsing at Barnes & Noble, S. Burlington, 7:30-8:30 p.m. Free. Info, 864-8001. KILLINGTON MUSIC FESTIVAL: Chamber music and swing combine in this bluesy jazz collaboration featuring Bostons Bellevue Cadillac and Sandra Wright. Wobbly Barn Steakhouse, Killington, 8 p.m. $10. Info, 773-4003.

dance BURLINGTON CONTACT JAM: Move and groove as it suits your mood at this alcohol-free, shoe-free open dance.

Memorial Auditorium Loft, Burlington, 79 p.m. $1. Info, 860-3674.

College St., Burlington, 8 p.m. $3-6. i Info, 865-9603.

drama

words

‘ANNIE’: Northern Stage mounts the Depression-era musical about a little orphan with a big heart. Briggs Opera House, White River Junction, 7 p.m. $20. Info, 291-9009.

PARENT-CHILD BOOK DISCUS SION: Grown-up readers and their 11 » 5 and 12-year-old kids compare notes or 1 Children o f the River, by Linda Crew. Deerleap Books, Bristol, 8 p.m. Free, i 453-5684.

film ‘IT’S MY PARTY’: Eric Roberts stars as an AIDS-stricken LA. architect who turns the occasion o f his passing into a party. Martin Luther King Lounge, Billings Student Center, UVM, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 434-5653.

art FIGURE DRAWING: The human figure motivates aspiring and accomplished artists in a weekly drawing session at the Firehouse Center, Burlington, 6:30-9:30 p.m. $3-6. Info, 865-7165. RAEL O NE CLOUD: The local perfor mance artist mixes music and spoken word to raise spirits at Rhombus Gallery, 186

kids

SONG A N D STORYTIME: The uni three crowd drops in for tunes and taldfl l Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, lOtj'B Ml Free. Info, 865-7216. Festva STORYTIME: Four- and five-year-oliB n; enjoy stories, songs, fingerplays and cri’f l rj South Burlington Community Library Chi rd a.m. Free. Register, 652-7080. CF R] STORIES: Little listeners hear stories. solst snack and make crafts at the Children proj esi Pages, Winooski, 10 a.m. Free. Info, Scar di 655-1537. Coleg, TINY TOTS: Kids three and u n d e r * 6 age-appropriate tales at Barnes & Nobk'^B Burlington, 10 am. Free. Info, 864-8001

paint by numbers:

Friday, December 18. Borders, Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, 3 :3 0 p.m . Free.

Art history books have more to say about Pablo Picasso than Morris Katz, but look in

Info, Info, 865-2711.

M edium

the Guinness Book o f World Records and you’ll find another story. W ith more than

what the dickens:

200,000 salable canvasses to his credit, Katz

Tired o f the same old Ebenezer-induced

swiped the “most prolific artist” title from

epiphany? Vermont comedian Pickles Reese

Picasso. Using his palette knife to mix and

puts a different spin on A Christmas Carol

paint at the same time, he is also the “fastest

in his one-man show, “Totally Scrooged.”

artist” in the world — producing original

In telling the classic holiday tale, he’ll chan

works in anywhere from seconds to mere

nel the familiar spirits o f Scrooge, Bob

minutes. To benefit the Lubavitch o f

Cratchit and Tiny Tim. But you better

Vermont, he paints the town . . . well, you

watch out — he’s just as likely to summon

get the picture.

Bernie Sanders, Fred Tuttle, Marlon Brando

Thursday, December 17. Radisson Hotel,

and Linda Tripp. God bless us, everyone?

Burlington, 7:30-9:30p.m . Free. Info,

Friday to Sunday, December 18 to 20.

658-7612.

Burlington City H all Auditorium , 7 p. m.

w/free Art Supplies

Taft Comers Shopping Ctr, Williston: 1/2 mile from exit 12 off \ OPEN9 -6 (M m-Fti) 1 0 -5 S a t 8 S 5 /

$10. Info, 472-6528.

captain craze: Hes he closest thing to a real-life Santa Claus — and “jolly” is definitely big this time o f

night moves: D on’t be S.A.D. about the short days and long nights

year. Captain Kangaroo, a.k.a. Bob

o f winter. Join a solstice-celebrating nature

Keeshan, is coming to town to sign his pic

walk in the dark woods hosted by the

ture books — including the Itty Bitty Kitty

Vermont Institute o f Natural Science.

series — family activity books and his com

Naturalists head up a nocturnal exploration

pilation o f recommended titles, Books to

that could turn up owls, stars, not-so-busy

Grow By. The 71-year-old Vermont resident

beavers — and definitely hot chocolate. An

is the current spokesman for the Vermont

indoor round o f solstice stories makes the

Children’s Trust Foundation, which will get

briefest day o f the year complete.

a portion o f proceeds from the Captain’s

Monday, December 21. V IN S North Branch

book sales. Beats riding around in a sleigh.

Nature Center, Montpelier, 7-9 p. m. $4. Info,

HOLIDAY CRAFT SALE: The former ery now inhabited by artists opens its rs to holiday shoppers. Its worth findthe Rose St. Artists Co-op, lington, 5-10 p.m. Free. Info, 660-8460. ESENTS FOR THE BIRDS’: A birdfriendly tree trimming extends good will to the winged at Green Mountain Audubon Society Nature Center, / ]j^Ult'n§ton’ 1*2 P-m- $3. Register, 1434-3068. ^SITTING GROUP: Needle workers swap techniques and design ideas with ■ r wool workers. Northeast Fiber Arts JS- Center, S. Burlington, 10 a.m. Free. Info, r 11*865 4981.

‘ANNIE’: See December 16. ‘DESIRE UNDER THE ELVES’: Santa Claus on an eggnog bender? Green Candle Theater revels in the dark side of Christmas. Shoebox Theater, 135 Pearl St., Burlington, 7:30 p.m. $7-15. Info, 893-7333. ‘RANDOM FRACTURES’: Artist P.RSmith takes on Shakespeare, Dylan Thomas and the Beats in a musical read ing with glow-in-the-dark props. Burlington College, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 862-9616. ‘NORTHERN COMFORTS’: Original one-act plays written and performed by local teens take center stage at the A.R.T. Studio Theater, Hannaford Center, Middlebury, 7:30 p.m. $4. Info, 382-1024.

;s o n ;

ursday 1INOR MASS’: The Vermont M ozj ival Orchestra teams up with the jna Singers to perform Bach’s aweiring choral work. Stowe Communit |rch, 7:30 p.m. $20. Info, 863-5966. jRISTMAS REVELS’: Celebrate the ories, ice in Nordic style with musicians, [dren'sj psions, dance and drama from ifo, piinavia. Hopkins Center, Dartmout Co! >e>Hanover, N .H ., 8 p.m. $16.50. der 4 603-646-2422.

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art LOIS FOLEY: The local artist discusses her exhibit of abstract works that combine natural, literary and mathematical themes. Firehouse Center, Burlington, noon - 1:15 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7165. RECORD-SETTING ARTIST: Gotta minute? Get a custom-designed instant painting from Morris Katz, whom the Guinness Book o f World Records calls the world’s fastest artist. See “to do” list, this issue. Radisson Hotel, Burlington, 7:309:30 p.m. Free. Info, 658-7612.

words LAZY WRITERS FORUM: Share your writing-in-progress in a supportive work shop environment. Kellogg-Hubbard Library, Montpelier, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 223-3338.

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kids PARENTS ANONYM OUS: Parents gath er for support and assistance around the challenges o f childrearing. Babysitting goes with the program at two meetings in Burlington and Milton, 6-8 p.m. Free. Info, 800-639-4014. STORYTIME & CRAFTS: Cultural activities keep your children occupied at the Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 1010:45 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. ‘NEW TITLES’ STORY TIME: Kids four and up hear it for the holiday at a reading o f What Night Do the Angels Wander? by Middlebury author Phoebe Stone. Barnes & Noble, S. Burlington, 3 p.m. Free. Info, 864-8001. STORY HOUR: Young readers learn from lighthearted literature in a country setting. Flying Pig Children’s Books, Charlotte, 10:30 a.m. Free. Info, 425-2600.

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etc HOMEOWNERSHIP ORIENTATION: Potential buyers learn how to select and pay for a home at the Burlington Community Land Trust, 179 South Winooski Ave., Burlington, noon. Free. Register, 660-0642. CONVERSATIONAL FRENCH: Converse with fellow Francophiles at inter mediate and advanced levels at this infor mal social cercle. Firehouse Center, Burlington, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 326-4814. ‘A W INTER’S EVE’: Music, mulled cider and candlelight tours led by costumed colonial guides make for a reflective look at holidays past. Ethan Allen Homestead,

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bach stroke In Bachs day, there was no such thing as a “great est hits” album, so the virtuoso organist took matters into his own hands. His powerful B M inor Mass combines into one seamless work movements from three decades o f composing. Sadly, the baroque master didn’t live long enough to hear the work performed — fewer than a dozen o f his compositions were published in his lifetime. Lift your spirits — and his — at a soul-stirring choral concert with the Vermont Mozart Festival Orchestra and the Oriana Singers. Thursday, December 17. Stowe Com m unity Church. 7:30 p. m. Friday, December 18. First Congregational Church, Burlington, 8 p.m . $20. Info, 863-5966.

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Burlington, 4-7 p.m. $5. Info, 8654556. VERMONT VENTURE MEETING: The monthly forum takes a virtual tour o f “Internet Opportunities in the Travel Industry.” Radisson Hotel, Burlington, 8-10 a.m. $15. Info, 658-7830. CUSTOMER SERVICE MEETING: The Vermont Consultants Network shares strategies for going it alone in the new millennium. Daymon Lurie & Goldsbury, 30 Main St., Burlington, 7:30 a.m. $15. Info, 351-0285. EMOTIONS ANONYMOUS: Women suffering from depression, anx iety or any other mental or emotional problem find sorority in this 12-step support group. Seneca Center, Champlain Mill, Winooski, 6-7 p.m. Free. Info, 660-9036. GLBTQ SUPPORT GROUP: Gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and questioning youth make new friends and get support. Outright Central Vermont, Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 800-452-2428.

Handel’s most popular work. North Country Union High School, Newport, 8 p.m. $18-31. Info, 800-876-9293.

drama ‘ANNIE’: See December 16, 8 p.m. ‘DESIRE UNDER THE ELVES’: See December 17. ‘NORTHERN COMFORTS’: See December 17. ‘TOTALLY SCROOGED’: Vermont comedian Pickles Reese sends up A Christmas Carol in his one-man spoof to benefit the Vermont Foodbank. See “to do” list, this issue. Burlington City Hall Auditorium, 7 p.m. $10. Info, 472-6528. ‘AMAHL AND THE NIGHT VISI TORS’: Giancarlo Menotti’s Christmas opera tells the tale of a crippled shep herd boy visited by three kings on their way to a birth in Bethlehem. Williston Federated Church, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 878-7865. MEDIEVAL CHRISTMAS PLAYS: Look out for irreverent humor in The Shepherd’s Play, followed by a dramatic version of the story o f Eden. Shelburne United Methodist Church, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 985-2827.

words music ‘B MINOR MASS’: See December 17, 8 p.m. ‘CHRISTMAS REVELS’: See December 17. NOWELL SING WE CLEAR: Audience participation is encburaged at this concert o f midwinter carols as they were performed for centuries in Britain and North America. College Street Congregational Church, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. $12.50. Info, 863-5966. CENTRAL SCHOOL CONCERT: The fifth-grade chorus, recorder troupe and string ensembles play for book browsers at Barnes & Noble, S. Burlington, 1-1:30 p.m. Free. Info, 864-8001. SOUTH BURLINGTON CO M M U NITY CHORUS: The local vocals sing “brisk tunes guaranteed to put you in a good mood.” Barnes & Noble, S. Burlington, 6-7 p.m. Free. Info, 864-8001. ‘MESSIAH’: The Vermont Symphony Orchestra teams up with the Essex Children’s Choir for a run-through of

POETRY READING: “The uncom mon din rises again” at this open read ing for poets o f all persuasions. Firehouse Center, Burlington, 8 p.m. Free. 864-6106.

kids SONG AND STORYTIME: The under-three crowd drops in for tunes and tales. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10:15 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. ‘MUSIC W ITH ROBERT RESNIK’: Kids sing songs with the musical host o f Vermont Public Radio’s folk show, “All the Traditions.’LFletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Register, 865-7216. CAPTAIN KANGAROO: Television legend Bob Keeshan yucks it up with fans at a multi-generational booksign ing. See “to do” list, this issue. Borders, Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, 3:30 p.m. Free. Info, Info, 865-2711. ‘KIDS KNIGHT O U T ’: The Women’s Basketball Team supervises sporting activities for kids between five and 12. Ross Sports Center, St. Michael’s

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College, Colchester, 5-9 p.m. $10. Info, 654-2721. STORY HOUR: Toddlers listen to sto ries at the Milton Public Library, 10:30 a.m. Free. Info, 893-4644. CHILDREN’S CHRISTMAS PARTY: Santa makes the scene — on skis? — at this holiday bash featuring horse-drawn wagon rides. Burke Mountain, E. Burke, 6-8 p.m. Free. Info, 626-3305.

etc ‘A WINTER’S EVE’: See December 17. EMOTIONS ANONYMOUS: See December 17. This co-ed section wel comes men. GLBTQ SUPPORT GROUP: Gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and questioning youth make new friends and get support. Outright Vermont, Burlington, 6:30-9 p.m. Free. Info, 800-452-2428. BATTERED W OM EN’S SUPPORT GROUP: Women Helping Battered Women facilitates a group in Burlington, 9:30-11 a.m. Free. Info, 658-1996.

Saturday music ‘MESSIAH’: See December 18. Ira Allen Chapel, UVM, Burlington, 8 p.m. TREBLE MAKERS: See December 16, Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, noon - 3 p.m. Free. Info, 863-1648. ‘CHRISTMAS REVELS’: See December 17, 2 & 8 p.m. COSTA RICA SONG BENEFIT: Donate your voice to a multicultural chorus and your hand-me-downs to the victims o f Hurricane Mitch. College Street Congregational Church, Burlington, 4:30-7 p.m. $5. Info, 658-5592. ESSEX ALLIANCE CHURCH CHOIR: The community chorus winds up a day o f caroling with an indoor gig at Barnes & Noble, S. Burlington, 4:30-5:30 p.m. Free. Info, 864-8001. ‘ENSEMBLES IN THE S N O W : The Vermont Youth Orchestra performs chamber music in string quartets, brass duos and woodwind and jazz ensem

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drama ‘TOTALLY SCROOGED’: See December 18.

continued on next page

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sport X-COUNTR C-COUNTRY SKI TRIP: Swoosh along the Cotton Brook Road on a dif ficult 10-mile trek — weather permit ting. Meet at Montpelier High School, 8:30 a.m. Free. Info, 223-7035. RICKER M OUNTAIN HIKE: The Burlington chapter o f the Green Mountain Club leads a hike or snow-

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kids STORY TIME: Kids three and up lis ten to literature read aloud. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. CANDLEHOLDER CRAFT WORK SHOP: Kids five and up transform a simple glass jar into a fancy, stainedglass vessel. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 1:30-2:30 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7216.

music ‘CHRISTMAS REVELS’: See December 17, 2 & 7 p.m. CHORAL MUSIC CONCERT: See December 19, 4 p.m. EKLECTIK ZURN: Talented teens play harp, cello, violin, recorders and keyboards at a mellow holiday happen ing. Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, noon - 3 p.m. Info, 863-1648. ‘MESSIAH’ CONCERT: The Hinesburg community chorus and orchestra sing Handel-y at this seasonal songfest. St. Jude’s Catholic Church, Hinesburg, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 482-3010. ‘MESSIAH’ OPEN READING: Sing or play along at this popular annual cel ebration o f Handel’s holiday oratorio. Bring sheet music and a music stand if you’ve got them. Middlebury Congregational Church, 2 p.m. Free.

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‘DESIRE UNDER TH E ELVES’: See December 17. ‘TOTALLY SCROOGED’: See December 18. ‘AMAHL A N D TH E N IG H T VISI TORS’: See December 18. ‘ANNIE’: See December 16, 2 & 8 p.m.

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etc HORSE-DRAWN CARRIAGE RIDES: Sleigh bells ring in the holiday season on the Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, noon - 4 p.m. Free. Info, 863-1648. SKY LAB: Get a guided tour of the heavens in an indoor planetarium that brings to light stars, planets and galax ies. Montshire Museum o f Science, Norwich, 11 a.m. 1 & 3 p.m. $1. Info, 649-2200. HURRICANE AID DROPOFF: No one deserves a visit from Santa more than the Honduran victims of Hurricane Mitch. Bring your donated food, medical supplies and camping equipment to Magic Hat Brewery, S. Burlington, 9 a.m. - noon. Free. Info, 863-0571.

IF I ONLY HAD A BRAIN

Thursday Power guitar, Lush Vocals

dance CONTRA DANCE: Linda Leslie calls for the Clayfoot Strutters at this north ern-style community hoedown. Capitol City Grange Hall, Montpelier, 8 p.m. $6. Info, 426-3734.

shoe at Little River State Park in Waterbury. Richmond Commuter Lot, 9 a:m. Donations. Info, 878-6618.

drama

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bles. Shelburne Town Hall, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 658-4708. CHORAL MUSIC CONCERT: Lisa Jablow conducts the Onion River Chorus in a program o f 19th- and 20th century holiday hits. Bethany Church, Montpelier, 8 p.m. $6. Info, 223-2632. GOSPEL CONCERT: The Addison County Ecumenical Choir sings songs o f the season at the Vergennes Opera House, 8 p.m. Free. Info, 877-6737. ELISABETH VON TRAPP: The hills are alive with the melodious music of the local songstress from Stowe. Jericho Congregational Church, 7 p.m. $7. Info, 899-4863. CHRISTMAS SING: Santa Claus falls by to dig the tunes from the Harwood Union student songsters. Green Mountain Cultural Center, 2 p.m. Free. Info, 496-7722.

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etc

kids

HORSE-DRAWN CARRIAGE RIDES: See December 19. CANDLELIGHT VIGIL: Brave the cold to honor the homeless souls who live every day without permanent shel ter in Vermont. Burlington City Hall, 4 p.m. Free. Info, 864-7402. HOLIDAY GIFT WRAPPING: Champlain College students pretty up your parcels to benefit the Burlington Emergency Shelter. University Mall, S. Burlington, 2-6 p.m. Donations. Info, 865-6432.

STORYTIME: Children from three to five enjoy stories, songs, fingerplays and crafts. South Burlington Community Library, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 652-7080.

music for singing along with a “pageant of midwinter carols” that also features Morris dancing and Mummers theater. So come, all ye faithful. Friday, December 18. College Street Church, Burlington, 7:30p.m. $12.50. Info, 863-5966.

‘A N NIE’: See December 16, 2 & 7 p.m. FOOL’S JACKET TROUPE: Local thespians stage dramatic readings of three holiday tales, including Dylan Thomas’s “A Childs Christmas in Wales.” Rhombus Gallery, 186 College St., Burlington, 8 p.m. $3-6. Info, Info, 865-9603.

kids STORYTIME: Young readers delve into classic and new tales at this halfhour happening. Borders, Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, 4 p.m. Free. Info, Info, 865-2711. ‘IF YOU GIVE A PIG A PANCAKE’: Pig out on snacks and meet the porky protagonist from Felicia Bond and Laura Muneroff’s charming book.

Flying Pig Children’s Books, Charlotte, 1-5 p.m. Free. Info, 425-2600. PARENT-TEEN BOOK DISCUS SION: Grown-up readers and their teenage kids join Midwives author Chris Bohjalian for a post- Oprah debriefing. Deerleap Books, Bristol, 8 p.m. Free. Info, 453-5684.

sport GROTON STATE PARK HIKE: Bring a seasonal snack to share on an easy “holiday hike.” Meet at Montpelier High School, noon. Free. Info, 479-2304 WINTER SOLSTICE HIKE: Don’t be afraid of the dark — be prepared for it. You’ll need a headlamp or flashlight on an afternoon hike to Butler Lodge. Info, 655-3071.

MAT m W E GUYS S IM M ABOUT?

m onday music CHORAL MUSIC CONCERT: See December 19. ‘MESSIAH’ SING-IN: Jane Bouffard gets a Handel on things as she leads the musical merry-making at this commu nity concert. Stowe Community Church, 7:30 p.m. $5. Info, 253-7792.

drama ‘ANNIE’: See December 16. FOOL’S JACKET TROUPE: See December 20.

music PAUL LOLAX: The local guitarist picks Celtic and traditional tunes at Barnes & Noble, S. Burlington, noon 2 p.m. Free. Info, 864-8001. TRILLIUM: Twelve a cappella voices sing winter songs from European, African and American traditions in the historic Vermont Meeting House, West Salisbury, 7:30 p.m. Donations. Info, 388-3856.

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TEEN HEALTH CLINIC: Teens get information, supplies, screening and treatment for sexually related problems. Planned Parenthood, Burlington, 3:30-6 p.m. Pregnancy testing is free. Info, 863-6326. SOLSTICE NIGH T WALK: Celebrate the shortest day o f the year with a “quiet walk in the dark woods.” Look forward to hot cocoa after lights out. See “to do” list, this issue. VINS North Branch Nature Center, Montpelier, 7-9 p.m. $4. Info, 229-6206. RUMMAGE A N D NEARLY NEW SALE: The whole family finds deals on clothes, household items and toys at a weekly yard sale. Ohavi Zedek Synagogue, North Prospect St., Burlington, 10 a.m. - 1 p.m. Free. Info, 862-2311. EMOTIONS ANONYMOUS: People with emotional problems meet at the O ’Brien Center, S. Burlington, 7:30 p.m. Donations. Info, 660-9036. BATTERED W O M EN’S SUPPORT GROUPS: Women Helping Battered Women facilitates a group in Burlington, 6:30-8 p.m. Free. Info, 658-1996. Also, the Shelter Committer facilitates a meeting in Montpelier, 5:30-7 p.m. Free. Info, 223-0855.

: s

Tuesday music AMATEUR MUSICIANS ORCHES TRA: Vermont Symphony violinist David Gusakov oversees this weekly harmonic convergence o f amateur musicians in the Music Room, S. Burlington High School,-7:30-9:30 p.m. $5. Info, 985-9750.

drama ‘ANNIE’: See December 16.

words WRITERS’ GROUP: Writers work with words at Dubie’s Cafe, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 865-9257.

kids STORIES A N D CRAFTS: Children cut and paste to the chase after a morn ing story. Borders, Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 865-2711. SNOWFLAKE CRAFT WORK SHOP: Kids o f all ages pitch in to deck the halls at the Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10 a.m. - noon. Free. Info, 865-7216. HOMESCHOOLERS GYM AND CRAFTS: Stay-at-home students take part in extracurricular activities at the Burlington Boys and Girls Club, Oak St., Burlington, 9:30 a.m. - 12:30 p.m. $1. Info, 860-1299. STORY TIME: Kids under three listen in at the South Burlington Community Library, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 652-7080. PRESCHOOLERS: Young readers three to five take a book break at

continued on page 36

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aikido AIKIDO: Adults, Mondays - Fridays, 5:45-6:45 p.m. and 7-8:15 p.m., Saturdays, 9-11:45 a.m. Children, Tuesdays & Thursdays, 3:45-4:45 p.m. Aikido of Champlain Valley, 17 E. Allen St., Winooski. $40/month intro special. Info, 654-6999. Study this graceful, flowing martial art to develop flexibility, confidence and self-defense skills.

kung fu

photography

tracking

‘VING TSUN’: Tuesdays and

PHOTOGRAPHY: Private or group,

‘TRACKS AND TRACES’: Saturday,

Thursdays, 7:45-9 p.m. The Body

basic and intermediate classes. Grand

December 19, 10 a.m. - noon. Green

Garage, Cherry St., Burlington. Info,

Isle or Burlington. Info, 372-3104.

Mountain Audubon Nature Center,

655-8671. This practical and applicable

Learn darkroom skills as well as how to

Sherman Hollow Rd., Huntington. $5.

martial art promotes health, fitness and

choose, use and exploit the camera to

inner peace.

express your creative style in. color and

pret animal tracks and other signs — and

black and white.

hope for snow.

ITALIAN: Ongoing individual and

reiki

writing

group classes, beginner to advanced,

REIKI CLINIC: Wednesday,

POETRY WORKSHOP: Thursdays, I

adults and children. Burlington. Info,

December 23, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Spirit

p.m. Ilsley Public Library, Middlebury.

865-4795. Learn to speak this beautiful

Dancer Books, 125 S. Winooski Ave.,

Free. Info, 388-7523. Bring a poem or

language from a native speaker and

Burlington. Donations. Info, 660-

two to read and discuss at this ongoing

experienced teacher.

8060. Experience Reiki, an ancient, non-

workshop.

develop a business idea.

‘START UP’: Beginning January 22. Burlington. $1250. Grants available. Info, 846-7160. Take the next step with your enterprise idea — research and write a business plan and learn other skills for starting your own business, through the Women’s Small Business Program.

language

computer CYBERSKILLS VERMONT: Ongoing day, evening and weekend

acting VERMONT ACTORS WORKSHOP: Wednesdays, January 20 through March 3, 6:30 - 9 p.m. Williston Central School. $95/six weeks. Info, 864-0119. Grace Kiley

classes. Old North End Technology Center, 279 N. Winooski Ave., Burlington. $39-349. Info, 860-4057, ext. 20. Take classes in computer basics,

meditation

Windows 95, Office 9 7 applications, Internet or Web site basics. Private and custom classes are also available.

offers classes in acting improvisation or performance technique.

art

cooking CUISINE OF NORTHERN ITALY:

‘MIXED MEDIA — ABSTRACT ART’: Saturday, January 9, 10 a.m. noon. Firehouse Center for the Visual Arts, Church St., Burlington. $10. Register, 865-7166. Children and par

Monday, January 11, 6-9 p.m. Isabel’s On the Waterfront, Lake St., Burlington. $40. Register, 865-2522. Learn to make a killer Bolognese sauce and other delectable dishes from northern Italy.

ents work together to create art in book form with collage materials and,paint.

FIGURE DRAWING: Ongoing Mondays,except December 21 and 28, 6-8:30 p.m. Fresco Studio, 1 Main St., Burlington. $3-5. Info, 862-4893. Artists o f all abilities are welcome at this weekly drawing sesfion.

business ‘GETTING SERIOUS’: Mondays and Thursdays, January 11, 14, 18,21. Morrisville. $115. Grants available. Info, 846-7160. The Womens Small Business Program helps you explore the possibilities and realities of business own

kendo KENDO: Ongoing Wednesdays and Thursdays, 6:45-8:30 p.m. Warren Town Hall. Donations. Info, 4964669. Develop focus, control and power through this Japanese samurai sword fencing martial art. -

THANK-YOU NOTES: Monday, December 28, 2-4 p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. $28. Register, 6550231. Kids seven to 11 get pointers on how to write enthusiastic thank-yous —

self-defense

YOGA: Wednesdays, 7 p.m. Green Mt.

GROUP’: Sundays, 5:30-7:30 p.m. 35

BRAZILIAN JIU-JITSU: Ongoing

Learning Center, 13 Dorset Lane,

King St., Burlington. Free. Info, 660-

classes for men, women and children,

Williston. $8. Info, 872-3797. Practice

9808. Join a group practicing Thich

Monday through Saturday. Vermont

yoga with Deborah Binder.

N hat Hanh-style meditation.

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Academy, 4 Howard

BEECHER HILL YOGA: MondaySaturday, daytime & evening classes for

‘TH E WAY OF TH E SUFI’: Tuesdays,

St., Burlington. Info, 660-4072 or 253-

7:30-9 p.m. S. Burlington. Free. Info,'

9730. Escape fear with an integrated self-

all levels. Info, 482-3191. Get private or

658-2447. This Sufi-style meditation

defense system based on technique, not

g o u p instruction in therapeutic yoga, vig

incorporates breath, sound and

size, strengh or speed.

movement.

spirit

p.m. Green Mountain Learning Center,

‘AURA PHOTOGRAPHY’: Thursday,

5:30 and 7 p.m. Flynn Gallery, 148

13 Dorset Lane, Suite 203, Williston.

December 31, 11 a.m. - 6 p.m. Spirit

Main St. Info, 658-3013. Find healing

S p ir it ©

BURLINGTON YOGA: Mondays,

Free. Info, 872-3797. Don’t just do

Dancer Books, 125 S. Winooski Ave.,

through Iyengar style yoga.

something, sit there!

Burlington. $25. Info, 660-8060. See

YOGA VERMONT: Daily classes, 12

MEDITATION: First & third

your aura in fa ll color. Get a two-page

p.m., 5:30 p.m. and 7:30 p.m.

Sundays, 10 a.m. - noon. Burlington

computer interpretation and a personal

Saturday and Sunday, 9:30 a.m. Chace

Shambhala Center, 187 S. Winooski

reading.

Mill, Burlington. Info, 660-5)718.

support groups

Buddhist meditations.

NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS:

SHELBURNE ATHLETIC CLUB

GUIDED MEDITATION: Sundays,

Ongoing daily groups. Various loca

YOGA: Mondays, Astanga, 5:30 p.m.,

10:30 a.m. The Shelburne Athletic

tions in Burlington, S. Burlington and

Tuesdays and Thursdays, Hatha 11:10

Club, Shelburne Commons. Free. Info,

Plattsburgh, Free. Info, Help Line,

a,m. The Shelburne Athletic Club,

985-2229. Practice guided meditation

862-4516. I f you’re ready to stop using

Shelburne Commons. Info, 985-2229.

far relaxation and focus.

drug, this group o f recovering addicts can

Take classes in rigorous Astanga or relax

offer inspiration.

ing Hatha yoga.

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Barnes & Noble, S. Burlington, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 864-8001. STORY HOUR: Kids between three and five engage in artful educational activities. Milton Public Library, 10:30 a.m. & 1 p.m. Free. Info, 893-4644.

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PICK-UP VOLLEYBALL: No matter how you set it up, this weekly co-ed adult game amounts to an evening of exercise. Edmunds Middle School, Burlington, 6:45-9:45 p.m. $2. Info, 865-7088.

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HANDCRAFTED BOWLS

FREE LEGAL CLINIC: Attorney Sandy Baird offers free legal advice to women with questions about family law, housing difficulties and welfare problems. Room 14, Burlington City Hall, 3-5 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7200. CAREGIVERS FOR TH E MEN TALLY ILL: Friends, family and anyone involved with the mentally ill get support at this monthly “share and care.” Howard Center for Human Services, 300 Flynn Ave., Burlington, 7-8:30 p.m. Free. Info, 862-6683. BATTERED W OMEN’S SUP PORT GROUP: Meet in Barre, 10:30 a.m. - noon. Free. Info, 223-0855.

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EKLECTIK ZURN: See December 20, Barnes & Noble, S. Burlington, 2-2:45 p.m. Free. Info, 864-8001.

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ailing All Joyful Souls

Featuring the Vermont Mozart Festival Orchestra and the Oriana Singers, William Metcalfe conducting.

Thursday, December 17 \^ntase Jewelery, Antiques, Linens Sc Apparel 4 frog hollow alley Middlebury • 388.2799

7:30 p.m., Stowe Community Church, Stowe Sponsored by Union Bank, Trapp Family Lodge and Stowe Mountain Resort

Friday, December 18 8:00 p.m. r First Congregational Church, Burlington Sponsored by Dr. and Mrsi Steven Metz, Dr. and Mrs. Henry Lemaire & Lang Associates

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I I

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SEVEN DAYS

december 16, 1998

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SEVEN DAYS

page 37

B la c k H o r s e

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holiday showcase/sale o f crafis worth passing f o m Hi s' one generation to the next. Pictured, “Baby Moon, ”an ocarina in clay by Delia Robinson.

c a l l to a r t is t s

way tetter than

Vermont visual artists in all media are invited to submit pro posals for a public art project at the Caledonia County Courthouse in St. Johnsbury. If interested in a January 9 site visit and/or application forms, contact Bill Botzow, Art in State Buildings coordinator for the Vermont Arts Council, at 802-447-7717 or botzow@sover.net. Artists are invited to participate in a group show at the Rose Street Gallery in Burlington. Deadline: December 28. For info, call 660-9060. Chaffee Center for the Visual Arts, RUTH GREENE MOULD, Floral Rutland, 775-0356. Through Pastels by the late Vermont artist. MORRIS KATZ, the “world^rastest Clarke Galleries, Stowe, 253-7116. January 17. artist” creates original oil paintings Through January 9. RECENT DRAWINGS AND MOD for sale. Firehouse Center for the MASTERFUL MUGS AND HOLIDAY ELS: Archetypal Forms and Visual Arts, Burlington, 865-7166 ORNAM ENTS, a seasonal exhibit Entropic Buildings, mixed media 1658-7612. December 17, 2 p.m. and sale of works by regional pot by architect John Anderson. Helen CHURCH & MAPLE GLASS STU ters. Vermont Clay Studio, Day Art Center East Gallery, DIO, Burlington, 863-3880. Waterbury Ctr., 244-1126. Stowe, 660-3150. Through Holiday sale and demonstrations, Through December. January 3. December 18-20, 9 a.m. - 8 p.m. SKYSCAPES & SEA DREAMS, AMERICAN QUILTS, folk art, prim paintings by Pria Cambio. Katie’s itives and vintage collectibles, holi Jewels, Montpelier, 229-9649. day exhibit and sale. Cupola Through December. House Gallery, Essex, NY, 518FROM HOM E, recent paintings by APPROACHING LIGHTNESS, a 963-7494. Through December 20. Rona Lee Cohen. Red Mill Gallery, mixed-media exhibit by 15 region VISIONS OF SUGARPLUM S, the Vermont Studio Center, Johnson, al artists. Furchgott-Sourdiffe 18th Annual Festival of the 635-2727. December 19 - January 5. Gallery, Shelburne, 985-3848. Christmas Trees. Helen Day Art DOROTHY M ARTINEZ paintings. Through January 5. Center, Stowe, 253-8358. Bread and Beyond, Williston, 878- DIGESTING THE ENIGM A, recent Through January 3. 1761. Through December. works by Orion Fredericks. 6TH AN N U AL TRADITIONAL ARTS CONVERGENCE, photographs and Metropolitan Gallery, Burlington, Showcase and Sale, featuring crafts poetry by Mat McDermott. 865-7166. Through December. from Vermont and the region. Burlington College Gallery, 862MOSTLY WOMEN HANGING OUT, Vermont Folklife Center, 9616. Through December 18. oil pastels, acrylic and embroidery Middlebury, 388-4964. Through VERMONT PHOTO GROUP: An paintings and drawings by Sophie December 23. Exhibition of Photographs by Ten Quest. Daily Planet Restaurant ART RESOURCE ASSOCIATION Area Artists. Pickering Room, Greenhouse, Burlington, 658HOLIDAY EXHIBIT, mixed media Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 1450. Through December. by members. City Center Lobby 863-3403. Through December. MATTHEW TH0RSEN PHO Gallery, Montpelier, 229-2766. IMPRESSIONS, oil paintings by TOGRAPHS, new and older works. Through January 3. Lorraine C. Manley. Sugar Mill Also, JA ZZ UNDER FOOT, pho TERRY RACICH, recent monotypes Art Gallery, St. Albans, 893-7860. tographs by Misha Makarov. Red and paintings on paper, and Through April. Square, Burlington, 859-8909. ANTHONY SINI, paintings and SEAN CALLAHAN, GINNY Through December. drawings. Rhombus Gallery, HILAND, NANCY MCKEEGAN, VERNISSAGE 1999, a retrospec Burlington, 865-3144. Through watercolors and photographs. tive of artists represented by the January. Woody’s Restaurant, Middlebury, gallery. Doll-Anstadt Gallery, WEBW0RKS, a creation of 388-4182. Through January. Burlington, 864-3661. Through Japanese knot weed, nylon, acrylic LOIS FOLEY: PAINTING. Also, “An December. and graph paper, inspired by Installation of Deterrents,” by IRA ANNUAL HOLIDAY SHOW AND Native American “dream catchers” BARTELL. Firehouse Center for the SALE, and silent auction featuring and mathematics, by Barry V. Visual Arts, Burlington, 865-7165. arts and crafts in all media. Miller. City Hall Showcases, Through January 20.

o p e n in g s

IS A B E L'S

ON THE WATERFRONT

o n g o in g

Winter Cooking Classes Call 865-2522 to register! Cuisine of Northern Italy

Gift Certificates Available

Jan 18

Hearty Soups, Stews, & Ragouts

Jan 25

Food & Wine of France

Feb 1

| Working W ith Chocolate

Feb 8

4 Quick Doughs & Pastries

Feb 22

Mediterranean Cuisine

Mar 8

The Art of Pairing Food & Wine

4 Basic Kitchen Skills & Techniques 4 Pasta Making & Creative Sauces

Mar 15 Mar 22 Mar 29

Something’s Smoking In The Kitchen

Apr 12

Food & Wine of the Pacific Northwest

Apr 26

Healthy Light Summer Fare

Hands-on

$40

W ine Dinner $50

Demo $40

All classes meet 6-9 pm on Mondays at Isabels (Prepayment required: MC/VISA, Discover, AmEx, checks) C om e try o u t our new W in te r Bistro M enu Tuesday - Saturday 5™ - 9 pm

page 38

SEVEN DAYS

december 16,1998

weekly

listings

on w w w . s e v e n d a y s v t . c o m

Montpelier, 229-2766. Through January 4.

Arts, 514-285-1600. Both through January 10.

VERY SPECIAL ARTS VERMONT

A MOMENT OF RISING MIST:

annual holiday card originals, show and sale at Higher Ground, Winooski, and Valley Air, South Burlington, 860-6220. Also sold at The body Shop, Muddy Waters and Peace & Justice Store, Burlington. Through January 1. MINIATURE TOY THEATERS, an exhibit of puppets and sets by stu dents of puppeteer Emily Anderson, sponsored by Very Special Arts Vermont and Howard Community Services. Fletcher Room, Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 863-3403. Through December.

Echoes of a Journey in China, photographs by Jeffrey P. Roberts. A Single Pebble Restaurant, Berlin, 476-9700. Through January 3. JANET MARTIN, paintings. Art Gallery of Barre, 476-1030. Through January 5. ORGANIC CURVES, watercolor paintings by Kate Hartley. Smokejacks Restaurant, Burlington, 660-2794. Through December. MYSTERIES IN STONE: Beyond Public Art, featuring sculptors from Barre and beyond, Main Gallery; and PAST MASTERS: History in Stone, featuring pho tographs from the archives of the Barre Museum, South Gallery. T.W. Wood Gallery, Vermont College, Montpelier, 878-8743. Through December 20. A GIFT TO THE COLLEGE: The Mr. and Mrs. Adolph WeilJr. Collection of Master Prints, featuring 110 works on paper from the donated collection of 257 Old Master and 19th-century European prints. Hood Museum of Art, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 603-6462808. Through December 20. URBAN VIEW S: Really Big Art show and sale by Caravan Arts atists in a 4’ x 4’ format. Fletcher Free Library Mezzanine, Burlington, 863-3403. Through December. SILKSCREEN PRINTS by Sally Stetson. Shimmering Glass Gallery, Waterbury, 244-8134. Ongoing. A BOUQUET OF FLORALS, paint ings and drawings by Pria Cambio. Bellini’s Restaurant, Montpelier, 223-5300. Through January 1.

TRAVELS THROUGH VERM ONT.

Thomas Jefferson’s Role in Vermont Statehood, 1791. An exhibit presented by the Jefferson Legacy Foundation. Sheldon Museum, Middlebury, 388-2117. Through March 5. Also, A GLIMPSE OF CHRISTMAS PAST:

Outdoor Fun and Fireside Pleasures, through December. ASSORTED WORKS ON PAPER in

mixed media, by Leonard Duffy. Good Times Cafe, Hinesburg, 482-3040. Through January. ELDER ART, a group exhibit in mixed media. Milton Public Library, through December 17, and Winooski City Hall, through December 18, 658-7454. PHOTOGRAPHS AND OTHER IMAGES by Ethan Jackson. Julian

Scott Memorial Gallery, Johnson State College, 635-1310. Through December 18. OLD BRICK CHURCH, new pho tographs by Fred Stetson. Dorothy Ailing Memorial Library, Williston, 878-4918. Through December. COLOR-COATED: PHYSICAL AND PHENOM ENAL WORKS, perfor

mance, photography, sculpture and installation by Missy Bly and Josh Reiman. Exquisite Corpse Artsite, Burlington, 864-5884, ext. 149. Through December. Call for times of Missy Bly’s performances. HAROLD ARTHUR DRURY & CAROL R0SALINDE DRURY, a

father-daughter show of paintings. Vermont Arts Council Spotlight Gallery, Montpelier, 828-3291. Through January 2. THE PRESENCE OF LIGHT, pastels, watercolors and oil paintings by Sally Loughridge. Isabel’s on the Waterfront, Burlington, 865-2522. Through December. PRINTS by Bill Davison. OneWall Gallery, Seven Days, Burling ton, 864-5684. Through December. UNEXPECTED PLACES, handmade prints by Roy Newton. Red Onion Cafe, Burlington, 865-2563Through December. FAMILY PICTURES & RECENT PAINTINGS by Alice Eckles. Old

School House Common, Marshfield, 456-8993. Also, RECENT PRINTS, Buffalo Mountain Coop, Hardwick. Both through December. RANNIS GALLERY GRAND O PEN ING, featuring the work of design-

er/goldsmith Timothy Grannis and other jewelry artists. Bank Street, Burlington, 660-2032. Ongoing. NVAA ANNUAL HOLIDAY ART SHOW AND SALE, featuring mem

bers’ works in mixed media. Red Mill Craft Shop, Jericho, 8991106. Through December 30. DUANE MICHALS: Words and Images, photographs and writings by the American photographer. Also, KEITH HARING, sculp tures, drawings and objects by the late artist. Montreal Museum of Fine

COMPILATIONS OF KNOWLEDGE:

The Diderot and Napoleonic Encyclopedias, volumes of text and engravings depicting French Enlightenment and Egyptian scholarship. Fleming Museum, Burlington, 656-0750. Through December 20. BEADS AND MORE BEADS, an exhibit from the permanent collec tion showing how European glass beads have been used in clothing, containers and more. Fleming Museum, Burlington, 656-0750. Through December. ELLEN HOFFMAN, pencil draw ings, and TOM MERWIN, paint ings. Merwin Gallery, Castleton, 468-2592. Ongoing. SCRAP-BASED ARTS & CRAFTS,

featuring re-constructed objects of all kinds by area artists. The Restore, Montpelier, 229-1930. Ongoing. 40 YEARS OF PHOTOGRAPHY,

featuring black-and-white pho tographs and books by Peter Miller. Peter Miller Gallery, Waterbury, 244-5339. Ongoing; by appointment only. 19TH AND 20TH CENTURY AMERICAN ARTISTS including

landscape paintings by Vermont artists Kathleen Kolb, Thomas Curtin, Cynthia Price and more. Clarke Galleries, Stowe, 253-7116. Ongoing. FURNISHINGS AND PAINTINGS

by Ruth Pope. Windstrom Hill Studio/Gallery, Montpelier, 2295899. Ongoing. PLEASE NOTE: Seven Days is unable to accommodate all of the displays in our readership area, thus these listings must be restricted to exhibits in truly public viewing places. Art in business offices, lobbies and private residences or studios, with occasional exceptions, will not be accepted.

By Marc Awodey J ■■■ is the season for holi■ day craft sales, fundraising letters, annual group exhibitions, and all sorts of wallet-loosening events meant to rekindle the flame of small-scale philan thropy in the warmed hearts of a cheery public. As Martha Stewart would say, “It’s a good thing,” and there is no better way to demonstrate your good taste than by giving the gift of hand-crafted visual art. For nonprofit galleries and arts organizations, this is a good time to remind patrons that the tax man is just around the corner, while for commercial gal leries and craft cen ters, holiday sales are a matter of life or death. - With these con siderations in mind, who can blame anyone for yet another painful production of The Nutcracker, or for an exhibition full of arty yet vapid landscapes, florid and illustrative abstractions, smoothed-down dogs and kitschy polar bears. ’Tis the season to be jolly, not a consumptive expressionist. Though the “Approaching : Lightness ’ group exhibition at j Furchgott Sourdiffe Gallery in Shelburne indeed approaches I the lightweight, in the spirit of the season I will look on the bright side. There are some interesting works pro vided by a few of the 15 regional artists in this show. Tad Spurgeon in not usuI ally a very daring painter. His I generally small, misty vistas characteristically rely on exact local color and reasonably basic compositions. But in this show he has included two pieces that allow the skill of his hand to show some real personality. “Otter Creek Road” and “Farr Cross Road” are both filled with fluid,

spontaneous brushwork remi niscent of Corot, and Spurgeon has solved composi tional problems with arrange ments that are more French than Yankee. “Otter Creek Road” has a meandering, low horizon line and a wildly foli ated — though naturalistically hued — canopy of trees that cleverly draws the viewer into the scene. Kathleen Kolb also pro vides a surprising, personal rendering of a traditional sta ple of landscape painting — moonrise — in her “September Moon Over

highly refined abstractionist, but her works here are filled with as much color as Weis’ are filled with darkness. In both cases an underlying geo metric structure sets the stage for a beach image, regardless of naturalistic precepts such as up, down, near and far. One of the most interest ing painters to have begun exhibiting in our area is Laura Von Rosk, from Paradox, New York. Though living in the Adirondacks, she paints hilly landscapes that are primarily mystical rather than referen tial. These small, untitled, oil on panel pieces hearken back

“ Skeletal Ways” by Hal Mayforth North Beach.” The piece is a nearly monochromatic indigo nocturne that presents a range of blues in watercolor. Great watercolors hold an indescrib able sparkle in the tooth of the paper, achieved by keeping the colors very clean and by piloting the brush with absolute control. Kolb achieves this in the simple bands of her image, and that sparkle is exquisite for the scene. “Taconic Horizon,” by Richard Weis, could also be interpreted as a nocturnal landscape, but the dramatic charcoal and pastel work is fundamentally pure abstrac tion. A slash of lightness defines the edge of a form looming before a void that seems too deep to be a night sky. Terry Racich is another

to the 15th-century roots of oil painting. The trees and fields themselves seem to have souls, and thus are worth a meticulous description in spir itual rather than naturalistic terms. Von Rosk’s composi tions contain curvaceous ovals and “S” curves, and her fields and woods are always bound ed by a high horizon where a jewel-like light seems to offer solace to the darkest areas of the forest. For Von Rosk, the Earth is Mother Earth, as manifested in a sophisticated blending of new and ancient ways of seeing. These few pieces in “Approaching Lightness” approach the lightness of illu mination, rather than the lightness of the trivial. Most of the other works are lesser lights somewhere in between. ®

“ Approaching Lightness,” Work by 15 Regional Artists, Furchgott Sourdiffe Gallery, Shelburne. Through January 5.

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munity, and the picture’s unfor gettable imagery is made even more ethereal by the ancient Tibetan music accompanying it. I heartily recommend a pil grimage to Montpelier for a look at documentary filmmaking at its finest — or just for the ultimate in cinematic escape. The latest from Michael Keaton, on the other hand, is one you’ll be scrambling to escape from. Jack Frost is a brain-damaged and treacly-sweet snowblow er of an effectsfest in which the actor plays an aspiring musician who dies in a car accident and returns to his wife and son exactly SN O W B IZ: Michael Keaton makes another abominable one year later in the form of a wise career choice. cracking snowman. The premise is that Keaton was a loving but career-obsessed father who never spent quite T H E S A LT M EN OF T I B E T * * * * enough time with his boy, though the real story JA C K F R O S T * * Outside my window there isn’t a solitary flake is that director Troy Miller obviously didn’t * spend enough time with his script. Kelly Preston of snow on the ground as I write this. Whether is mom, Joseph Cross is the kid, and Jim or not the weather takes a turn for the wintery, however, the white stuff will be in abundant sup Henson’s digital effects company provided the considerably less-than-cutting-edge computer ply this weekend — at the movies. Opening at the Savoy Theater Friday is the graphics. latest documentary from highly acclaimed film Once he’s reunited with the boy, Keaton leads maker Ulrike Koch. The Saltmen o f Tibet follows him on an uninspired series of escapades and four nomadic tribesmen on their annual yak car jolly hijinks designed to supply gleeful, feel-good avan, an arduous and nearly three-month pilgrim sound bites for the film’s TV commercials, even age across the frozen top of the world to the holy though the temperatures are as unseasonably salt lakes of the Changtang region. There the men warm where the story takes place as they have harvest salt to be traded for the grain needed to been here, and the third act of the picture is, pre sustain their village through the coming year. dictably, every bit as sad and tragic as the first. Shot under extreme conditions in one of the Hey, happy holidays! world’s most remote locations, the film offers a Hopefully, Keaton’s New Year’s resolutions vision of a rapidly vanishing way of life. Koch will include actually reading scripts before he painstakingly records many of the traditions, signs on. In the meantime, my advice is pass on myths and day-to-day rituals of the small com the yucks and go with the yaks. ®

ILMS RUN F R I D A Y . D E C 1 8 THROUGH T H U R S D A Y .....D E C 2 4 N IC K E L O D E O N C IN E M A S

s h o w t i me s

College Street, Burlington, 863-9515.

E T H A N A L L E N C IN E M A S 4

6:30, 7:15, 8:50, 9:40. Star Trek: Insurrection 12, 12:45,

North Avenue, Burlington, 863-6040.

2:15, 3, 4:30, 5:10, 6:50, 7:30, 9:15, 9:50. Elizabeth

Prince of Egypt* 11:20, 11:45, 1:45, 2:30, 4:10, 4:50,

What Dreams May Come 7, 9:45. Wizard of Oz 12:15, 2:15,

12:30, 3:15, 7, 9:30. A Bug’s Life 11:30, 2, 4:20, 6:40, 9.

4:15. Antz 11:45, 1:30, 3:15, 5, 7:15, 9. I’ll Be Home By

All shows daily unless otherwise indicated.

Christmas 12, 1:45, 3:30, 5:15, 7, 8:45. Practical Magic 12:30, 2:45, 5:30, 7:45, 10.

T H E SAVOY Main Street, Montpelier, 229-0509.

C IN E M A N IN E Shelburne Road, S. Burlington, 864-5610

The Saltmen of Tibet* 1:30 (Sat-Sun), 6:30 & 8:45 (daily). Closed 12/24.

You’ve Got Mail* 11:15, 1:50, 4:30, 7:10, 9:50. The Prince

A t th e fo llo w in g th e a te rs in o u r area lis tin g s n o t

of Egypt* 11:40, 12:25, 2, 2:45, 4:25, 5:10, 7, 7:30, 9:25, 10. Mighty Joe Young* 4:40 (Sun only), 7:10 (Sat only). A

ava ila b le a t press tim e . C all fo r in fo .

Bug’s Life 11:50, 1, 2:15, 3:45, 4 (not Sun), 7:10 (not Sat),

C A P IT O L T H E A T R E 93 State Street, Montpelier,

9:20. Enemy of the State 6:30, 9:40. Rugrats 12:20, 2:35,

229-0343.

4:55. Waterboy 7:05, 9:45. Psycho 7:40, 10. Jack Frost

P A R A M O U N T T H E A T R E 241 North Main Street, Barre, 479-9621.

12:10, 2:30, 5, 7:20, 9:35. Star Trek: Insurrection 11:45, 2:10, 4:35, 7:15, 9:50. All shows daily except where noted. S H O W C A S E C IN E M A S 5 Williston Road, S. Burlington, 863-4494. You’ve Got Mail* 12:30, 1:15, 3:30, 4:15, 6:40, 7:20, 9:20, 9:50. Meet Joe Black 12:40, 4, 7:30. Waterboy 12:50, 2:50, 4:50. Psycho 7:05, 9:40. Jack Frost 1, 3:40, 6:50, 9:30. All shows Sat.-Sun. No matinees Mon.-Fri.

S T O W E C IN E M A Baggy Knees Shopping Center, Stowe, 253-4678. M A D R IV E R F L IC K Route 100 , Waitsfield, 496-4200. M A R Q U IS T H E A T E R Main Street, Middlebury, 388-4841. W ELD EN THEATER 527-7888.

104 No. Main Street, St. Albans,

w e e k l y l i s t i n g s on w w w . s e v e n d a y s v t . c o m . SEVEN DATS r;

december 16, 1998

Tim Alleh $ YOU’VE GOT MAIL L o o k for

M a rtin S h o rt, a m o n g o th ers,

prom ises w ill be th e last in stall

along w ith songs co u rtesy o f

m e n t in this lucrative b u t

Pocahontas co m p o se r S tep h en

increasingly lam e ac tio n -c o m e

lots o f Sleepless in Seattle fans to

S chw artz.

d y series.

w ait o n line for tickets to this

MIGHTY JOE YOUNG D isn ey ’s

HALLOWEEN H20 * * Its central

T o m H a n k s-M e g R yan re u n io n

latest live-action release offers a

ch aracter m ay be a g u y n am ed

fro m th e ver^ sam e screen

dig itally e n h a n c e d u p d a te o f a

M ichael M yers, b u t m y guess is

select eight well-known

w riter. T h e tw o fall for o n e

little-seen 1949 film a b o u t a

this latest in sta llm e n t in the

movies and replace

a n o th e r in an In te rn e t c h a t

g ia n t m isu n d e rsto o d ape.

Halloween series w ill prove less

their titles with a word

ro o m , o b livious to th e fact th a t

H m m m , so u n d s m ig h ty fam il

th a n shagedelic. F rom the'

or phrase which means 3

th ey are business rivals in th e

iar. Bill P axton a n d C harlize

w rite r b e h in d those inexplica

exactly the same thing

n o n -v irtu a l w o rld . G reg

T h e ro n star.

bly p o p u la r Scream m ovies.

as the original. What

K in n e a r co-stars. N o ra E p h ro n directs. THE PRINCE OF EGYPT T h e

W ith Jam ie Lee C u rtis a n d

new

A d am A rk in . MADELINE Frances D o rm a n d

on video

a n d H a tty Jones star in this

release fro m D re a m W o rk s s tu dios tells th e ep ic O ld

LETHAL WEAPON 4 (NR) C h ris

B em elm an ’s beloved ch ild ren ’s

T e sta m e n t sto ry o f M oses a n d

R o ck jo in s forces w ith M el

b o o k a b o u t a m ischievous

features th e voices o f Val

G ib so n a n d D a n n y G lo v er for

F ren ch schoolgirl. W ith N igel

K ilm er, S a n d ra B u llo ck a n d

w h a t d ire c to r R ich ard D o n n e r

H a w th o rn e .

first tra d itio n a lly a n im a te d

a d a p ta tio n o f L udw ig

Welcome once again to the version of

f|k

our game in which we

w e’d like you to do, of

f" BetterorWorse

* * * * * NR = not reviewed___

P S YC H O **172 I f y o u ’ve ever

BABE: PIG IN THE CITY (NR)

WHAT DREAMS MAY

d o u b te d for a se c o n d th a t th e

E v ery b o d y ’s favorite h a m is

C O M E **** R o b in W illiam s

m ovie in d u s try has b e c o m e a

b a c k a n d , in th is sequel to th e

stars here as a car-crash fatality

1 0 0 % p u re ly busin ess p ro p o si

1995 B est P ic tu re n o m in e e , he

tio n , th e latest fro m d ire c to r

leaves th e farm fo r a taste o f

G u s V an S a n t sh o u ld erase all

city life. M a g d a S zu b an sk i an d

d o u b t. W h a t is th e possible

Jam es C ro m w e ll co-star.

p o in t o f a s h o t-fo r-sh o t

G eo rg e M ille r directs.

also dead . H ey, does th is have

rem ake o f th e H itc h c o c k m ile

ELIZABETH (NR) C a te

“feel-g o o d ” h it w ritte n all over

sto n e fe a tu rin g A n n e H e c h e ,

B la n c h e tt stars in th is lo o k at

it o r w hat?

except a g u a ra n te e d p ro fit for

th e life o f th e 1 6 th -c e n tu ry

PRACTICAL M A G IC **172

U niversal stu d io s o n its $25

royal.

G riffin D u n n e ad ap ts Alice

m illio n in v estm en t? W ith

MEET JOE BLACK** F ro m The

H o ffm a n ’s 1995 best-seller

V in ce V a u g h n a n d V iggo

Scent o f a Woman to The

a b o u t a p a ir o f sisters d escen d

M o rte n se n .

Stench o f Death? W ell, so rt of.

ed fro m a lo n g lin e o f w itches.

STAR TREK: INSURRECTION

In th e latest fro m M a rtin

S a n d ra B u llo ck a n d N ico le

(NR) T h e n in th in s ta llm e n t in

B rest, B rad P itt plays a G rim

K id m a n star.

th e u n sc ru b b a b le series stars

R eap er w h o decides to get

I’LL BE HOME FOR CHRIST

P atrick S te w a rd ta n d takes

physical a n d sam p le th e p lea

MAS (NR) Jo n a th a n T aylor

place o n a faraw ay p la n e t h a r

sures o f th e flesh. C laire

b o rin g th e secret to e tern al

F o rlan i, for exam ple. W ith

y o u th . B re n t S p in e r co-stars, J o n a th a n Frakes directs.

A n th o n y H o p k in s a n d Jefrey T am b o r.

ENEMY OF THE STATE* W ill

RUGRATS (NR) T h e E m m y -

S m ith a n d G e n e H a c k m a n

w in n in g N ic k e lo d e o n series

star in Je rry B ru c k h e im e r’s la t

m akes th e leap to th e big

est a c tio n package, th e saga o f

screen, a n d th e Pickles w el

an u p -a n d -c o m in g a tto rn e y fram ed for m u rd e r by a sh a d ow y intelligence operative. A BUG’S LIFE (NR)

Antz m a y

have m ad e it to th e th e a te rs first, b u t e v e ry th in g I ’ve seen indicates P ix ar’s clever c o m p u te r-d riv e n c o m e d y w ill have no tro u b le c o m m ittin g in se c ti cide a t th e box office. F eatu rin g th e voices o f D ave Foley, K evin S pacey a n d D a v id

co m e a n e w m e m b e r to th e fam ily. M o m a n d D a d , keep an ear p ric k e d fo r so u n d tra c k

w h o se w id o w (A nnabella Sciorra) c o m m its suicide, a n d w h o th e n c o n d u c ts a search fo r h e r w ith th e h elp o f C u b a G o o d in g Jr., w h o o f course is

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OPENS DECEMBER 12

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3. AND WITH REGARD TO ROBERT?

s h o rts

Kirstie Alley

5. BROBDINGNAGIAN 6. MARTIAN REINCARNATION

7 . DONT HIT THE PERCUSSION INSTRUMENT QUICKLY 8. THE SCHWINN LIFTER

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plays a p re p school b ra t w h o discovers th e tru e m ean in g o f the holidays in th e course o f a c ro ss-c o u n try trip h o m e. Jessica Biel co-stars.

9Y LLOYD

T K O w im m i

dangls

OAma Tl*ei> OF SFlNG, CRiriCIZCD, TANFT RFNO SiMi/LT-irvfovSLy appoints onf iNoePtwoeNT cot/rvsfL For

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W A S H IN G T O N W ITH

SUSPIC IO US F I N A N C I N G /

ja/

ANTZ (NR) In th e first o f th e year’s tw o — c o u n t ’em : tw o — a n im a te d b u g sagas, W o o d y A llen provides th e voice o f a d ro n e w h o longs for b o th a m o re in d e p e n d e n t life a n d a fem ale a n t played by

c o n trib u tio n s fro m B eck a n d

S h aro n S tone. W ith a d d itio n a l

Iggy Pop.

vocal stylings co u rtesy o f

THE W A TER B O Y***172 A d am

Sylvester S tallone, Jane

S a n d le r plays a d im w it w h o

C u rta in an d C h risto p h e r

rises to g rid iro n g lo ry in this

W alken.

box-office p h e n o m fro m th e

THE WIZARD OF 0Z (NR) T h e

d ire c to r o f The Wedding

m u sical classic is b ack in all its

Singer. W ith K a th y B ates a n d

dig itally e n h a n c e d glory.

F airuza B alk.

H y d e Pierce.

december 1 6 ,1 9 9 8 , v .TV'-sa,

SEVEN DAYS .

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page 42

$EVEN DAYS

december 16,1998

hen a new eatery opens in Waterbury next month, it’s sure to cause some New Year’s rejoic ing. And while it seems that restaurants pop up practically overnight, you could say The Mist Grill was 10 years in the making — for the last decade, co-owner Steve Schimoler has been, well, cooking. In 1989 Schimoler, a wildly energetic New York chef with four successful businesses — two restaurants, a bakery and a catering company — came to Vermont. He was looking for a dairy company to co-produce, package and distribute a line of restaurant-quality flavored but ters that he had developed. Ben & Jerry’s seemed like an obvi ous choice for a progressive manufacturer, and during the next six months of rambling negotiations, he spent a lot of time driving back and forth from the city to the country. O n one trip, Schimoler spotted a vacant 175-year-old red brick grist mill tucked back beside Thatcher Brook Falls on Stowe Street in Waterbury. Being a dreamer who can’t see an apple without imagining the pie, he immediately visualized the mill as a great spot for a restaurant. His m ind’s eye even transposed the rather prosaic

sign out front — The Grist Mill — into the restaurant’s name, “The Mist Grill.” But Schimoler’s focus then was the butter project, and when nego tiations with Ben & Jerry’s deteriorated, he quickly shifted gears and made a deal with Cabot Creamery. Ultimately, the butter enterprise took off, demanding Schimoler’s full attention, and it would be years — and millions of airline miles — before he got back to the lit tle mill on Stowe Street. Only 28 at the time, Schimoler’s intense, opinionat

’'T - 'A JA ' .' V.’ ■'

Schimoler, who is as magnetic as he is cocksure. “I was talking this whole other language — it was stuff they had never heard of.” Getting the stuff made, however, turned out to be the easy part. When it came time to sell the butters, Schimoler had radically different ideas from the national sales force at Cabot. “Their version of food ser vice sales at the time was to put the sour cream in a bigger tub and to charge a few cents less for it,” explains Schimoler, who had much more august ideas. As a savvy chef and relentless operator, he knew there was a real need in the food service for high-quality, value-added prod ucts. “I saw the flavored butters as an entree in providing some one like the Red Lobster chain with a very easy way to add value to plain fresh fish,” Schimoler says. “It was so easy, no one had to do anything — just drop some flavored butter onto a piece of fish.” It worked. Just two months into his relationship with Cabot, they were selling 40,000 pounds of flavored butters per week to Red Lobster. This quick success was the push Schimoler needed to get out of New York and start his skyrocketing career as a food service consultant. He took a position as the Director of Food Services for Cabot, and started a one-man show in product development and sales that created millions of dollars of new business for Cabot with in three years. “It was a whole new category of growth,” Schimoler exults. “We got Cabot cheese onto the airlines, we were selling all of the sour cream to Red Lobster, Olive Garden and Marriott. We kicked some major butt. It completely revolutionized the company.” In 1990, based on the suc cess of the flavored butters and increased food-service sales, Schimoler started a division called Cabot’s Kitchen, dedicat ed to developing customized menu items and recipes for clients using a variety of Cabot

We kicked some major butt. It completely revolutionized the company.” — Steve Schimoler ed New York attitude brought him immediately to loggerheads with the old-time Vermont but ter-makers whose initial reac tion was: “You’re gonna put what into our butter?” But he continued to commute to Cabot to oversee the produc tion of these new-fangled but ters — with flavors like sundried tomato, pesto and bal-' samic vinegar — even while juggling his other businesses. It was amazing,” remarks

products. Word got around quickly, and soon he was field ing calls from food manufactur ers and restaurant chains all around the country asking him to develop a variety of prod ucts. The problem was that, as his range of clients grew, so did the range of products, and it quickly became impossible to remain under the Cabot umbrella. “It became a little profit center real quick,”

Schimoler says. “I was getting phone calls from everywhere and charging lawyer rates, but I just couldn’t put Cabot into everything.” Around the same time, Schimoler had developed another new product idea, so he decided it was time to go out on his own. “I figured I had a great foundation of cus tomers and I wanted to launch this new product,” he explains, “so I left Cabot and moved to Chicago” — a hub of the food service industry. Over many late-night calls with Robin Schempp, a kindred spirit and fellow alum of Paul Smiths College Hotel and Restaurant Management Program, the two decided to become business partners. Schempp, a bright, clear eyed thirtysomething whose speech is peppered with superlatives — “the most amaz ing,” “totally wild” and “so much fun” are favorites — had burnt out on a five-year stint working as a “restaurant expert” in New England. Her quick smile and instant warmth pairs well with Schimoler’s more amplified approach. Together they became Right Stuff Enterprises, and launched an aggressive campaign to market themselves as culinary consul tants. W ithin a short time, the pair established strong ties with , some of the largest food manuIfacturers in the country — Nestle Brand, NutraSweet and Olive Garden, to name a few — and were flying all around Ithe country developing, testing land marketing customized Iproducts for manufacturers, restaurant chains and equip ment suppliers. “Everything was moving to customization in the food ser vice,” Schimoler explains. “I can’t name five products that hre sold off the shelf to chains. Everything else on their menus Is custom-developed for that Ipecific account.” More and more, Right btuh Ivas picking up these accounts. Ilemembering their first year, Kchempp relates, “We gained In incredible amount of sensoly and technical experience. It N'as so much fun. ” Schimoler and Schempp are both serious chefs in their own right; they work hard to stay I n top of the latest trends and g >out of their way to dine in the best restaurants and experi ence the best products avail able. In addition to their forays ii»to the world of corporate food, they cultivated relationslips with the movers and soakers of fine dining. The pair ■orked closely with the ■nerican Culinary Federation B d helped out with the interB tional Culinary Olympics. ■ How do they manage bridge the seemini t iarate B>rlds of mega-manufacturers H d artisan chefs? “Certainly K don’t agree with all of our ■ents,” responds Schempp, Continued on p ag e 4 5

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Recipes fo r... C o n tin u e d from p ag e 4 3

and in their familiar habit o f ’ finishing one another’s thoughts, Schimoler adds, “but one of the things that drives us incessantly is that quality, and the point of reference for quali ty, is entirely relative.” W hether they’re working on a new recipe for chicken ten ders for Applebee’s or baked penne with aged Asiago cheese for a swanky Boston eatery, Schimoler and Schempp are determined to make it the best it can be — the “right stuff” in the right context. “We don’t just come up with the fluff and the ideas. We’ll take ownership and be accountable for change,” Schimoler declares, with an irresistible confidence. “Where we really excel is taking an idea and making it real. It’s a great way to make a living — to be as creative as you possibly can ' be.” The consulting business grew so much that it required a serious home base to set up a testing kitchen and an office. Since most of their work is on location, it didn’t really matter | where they lived as long as the airport was accessible. Vermont seemed as good a place as any. [“Besides,” quips Schempp with Icharacteristic vivacity, “we real ity liked Vermont.” So in 1993, Right Stuff moved its office to Winooski,

and then to Waterbury, just up the Ijill from the very grist mill that had captured Schimoler’s imagination years before. Today Right Stuff Enterprises has three full-time staff as well as varying project-specific help. Attached to the comfortable, stylish house that Schimoler and Schempp share as partners in life and work is an open, one-room office and a small lab that is redesigned according the project du jour. Last week, for instance, it was set up as a cof fee bar for developing and test ing a new line of Nescafe coffee drinks and equipment headed for Sony Theaters. The week before it resembled a bakery lined up to create and test ready-to-bake Toll House Cookies for supermarket bakery departments. At other times it’s a candy kitchen for creating “bits” to put into McDonald’s McFlurry shakes — pumpkin pie and Toll House are two of the new flavors. “This is really big business,” Schempp explains, “There’s not a lot of people who do what we do in food service, and food service is huge. It’s wild how much stuff we do for people.” A long way from their origi nal vision of simply developing products, Right Stuff now con sults on packaging, advertising, concept development, distribut ing, you name it. If it’s even remotely connected to the food business, they’ve probably done it.

O ’Neill had been in love with « the mill for years. “I beliey&it .*» h a ^ a ^ u l,” she explaffis. d To nurture that soul, O ’Neill has spent the past six years carefully restoring the building with Russ Bennett and Northland Construction of Waitsfield. When Schimoler called her, she had already decided that the mill needed to be a restaurant, but couldn’t find the right people to run it. Schimoler and Schempp “have got the style it needs,” she says. “It’s the best possible marriage. Really, it’s a dream come true.” And so Right Stuff formed yet another creative alliance — this one called Waterbury Feed Company, assuming the faded moniker still apparent on the front of the old mill — by join ing forces with Mane and Holly Alves and Schimoler’s brother t’s hard to imagine Schimoler Paul. Alves, an ex-winemakerand Schempp finding the turned-coffee-expert, runs time for any other projects, Coffee Lab International, a spe but even with their very full cialty coffee laboratory, roastery plate, the dynamic duo still and consulting firm already longed to have their own established in the one complet restaurant — a place that could ed room in the building. Paul be a real-life development cen Schimoler, a seasoned restaura ter for new projects. As they teur, will manage The Mist considered locations, Grill. Schimoler’s vision for the old The concept for the Mist grist mill loomed from the back Grill, scheduled to open in of his mind. Finally, he called January, is ambitious and inno Carol O ’Neill, the owner of the vative, not surprisingly. The building, and discovered that he first floor will house a retail was not alone in his dream. A bakery, “Grist and Grinds,” paralegal at Ben & Jerry’s, with a range or rustic breads,

But not all their projects are for the big guys. They also do quite a lot of work for small companies, especially here in Vermont where their clients include Ten Mothers Salad Dressings and Dips, Annie’s Homegrown and Gracie’s in Stowe. Right Stuff also played a major role in the 1996 joint venture involving Waterbury Holdings, McKenzie of Vermont, All Season’s Kitchens and Bruegger’s. In fact, Right Stuff specializes in joint ven tures, and one of their most recent collaborative efforts is Chef Stuff. The line of pre pared, ready-to-heat menus from five of America’s top chefs will be sold in 230 stores across the country by next July, according to Schimoler.

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D o w n sta irs, th e M ist G rill C afe w ill seat u p to 4 5 in a sp ectacu la r ro o m d o m in a te d b y m assive, ro u g h sto n e w alls fro m th e o rig in a l fo u n d a tio n , a u th e n tic b eam s, a n tiq u e m ill w o rk s a n d large w in d o w s o v erlo o k in g T h a tc h e r B ro o k Falls. T h e re w ill be a coffee b a r fo r tastin g s, an o p e n e x p o sitio n k itc h e n , a n d a large c e n te r tab le, k n o w n as th e c h e f ’s tab le, fo r large g ro u p s a n d special tastin g s.

The cafe is scheduled to be open for breakfast and lunch seven days a week, and for casu al Sunday suppers. Plans are in the works, too, to host “Distinctive Dinners” two weekends a month — special events where both Schimoler and Schempp will be behind the stove. The upstairs floor space will incorporate an art gallery and community gather ing space. W ith the scheduled opening next month, the mill is still mostly a construction zone, but Schimoler and Schempp are unfazed. In fact, they seem to be thoroughly enjoying the whole process. “It’s a really fun playground,” Schimoler joyfully explains. And if their track record is anything to go by, this playground will be a delicious diversion. ®

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Two outdoors writers put their heads together on the helmet issue

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David Healy: Ready to catch the chairlift? Flip Brown: Yeah, I’m ready, but you’re not. Where’s your helmet? DH: Flip, Flip, Flip — don’t tell me you’re one of those hel met-evangelists?

DH: Flip, I have some thoughts on this topic, but time’s a-wastin’. Let’s go ski. FB: You’re right, we can talk about it on the lift. DH: I don’t even want to talk about it; it’s bad ju-ju to talk about these things.

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t was a gray December day when our intrepid reporters went out in search o f an out door story. Being avid skiers and riders, they made their way to one o f their favorite northern Vermont ski resorts. As luck would have it, a story hit them over the heads, as it were, well before they hit the slopes.

FB: No, it’s just that those of us with brains have figured out how to protect them.

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FB: This is too important to let slide. Besides, this could be our story — let’s debate the issue. DH: Okay, but first let me knock on wood. FB: Dave, keep your hands to yourself!

FB: Well, I had been thinking about it for quite some time, but then the sweetheart sprang for one. And now that I have it, I feel safer. It’s like the safety bar — which, by the way, I noticed you just put down. DH: It’s a habit — like our tendency to only take notice of an issue when something hap pens to a celebrity. If it weren’t for Michael Kennedy and Sonny Bono, you and half the people down there on the hill wouldn’t be wearing the ugly things. FB: Not true. And talk about ugly — how would you have liked being one of the patrollers who cleaned up the mess after those accidents? DH: I ’m not saying ‘don’t wear helmets.’ I mean, football is a contact sport. If you’re going to play football on skis, wear a helmet. All I’m saying is, that if you’re just skiing — and I don’t mean while on pain killers — you don’t need one. FB: That’s what bike riders used say, too. But statistics from cycling show that more than a thousand riders are killed each year, two-thirds of them by head injuries. The stats also show that wearing a helmet cuts the risk of head injury by 85 percent and brain injury by 88 percent. I don’t know the exact numbers for skiing, but it’s got to be similar. Like cycling or in-line skating, ski ing’s a helmet sport. DH: A ctually, w h ile sk iin g has its risks, h e a d in ju ries are fairly

As Flip and David load the chairlift, skiers and riders o f all types — some with helmets, some without — swoop down the mountain.

u n c o m m o n . Y our risk o f d y in g w h ile sk iin g , acc o rd in g to th e p e o p le w h o tra c k th is stuff, is a b o u t o n e in a m illio n . T h e fact is, y o u ’re 4 0 p e rc e n t m o re likely to be d e v o u re d b y a flesh-eating

DH : So, w h a t’s th e sco o p w ith th e n ew b ra in b u ck et? 1

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— David Healy ..~C.v . FB: Whoa, it smells more like your ski socks. Down on the slope, an out-ofcontrol skier flies off a bump at warp speed. Out o f his line o f sight, a snowboarder sits on the slope adjusting a binding. The skier narrowly misses the rider and careens into the trees at the edge o f the trail. FB: Look at that Bozo. That could have been you down there.

act

ely ng ck

DH: W ho you calling Bozo? Seriously, do you mean the guy who just got missed or the guy on the skis? FB: Who cares about the dare devil — its their own business if they want to take their own lives in their hands. But people

are being run into all the time. Helmets are essentially “take out” insurance — protection for when someone takes you out. DH: Flip, I’ll concede one point: If I had a child, I’d put a helmet on ’im in a minute. But for myself, I still like my wool hat, and when the slopes are crazy, I take refuge in the glades. FB: So what you’re telling me is that your head is harder than a map!e: DH: No, but it’s like that old saying, “It’s not what you got, but how you use it.” Judgment, not padding, is what’s needed when you venture off trails. People would be better off investing in backcountry safety

courses than in helmets, and then feeling like they can turn off the light bulb under the plastic. FB: I’ll give you that one, Dave, but it still leads me back to the question, “How much is your head worth?” DH: Is this the French Revolution or the Spanish Inquisition? You want to talk about money — did you know that most ski helmets are craft ed for style and weight with an eye to sales? They don’t even meet the standards set by Snell, the helmet standards group.

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dards — over that wool Peruvian crash helmet you call a ski hat. DH: You don’t like this hat? Look, wear your helmet if it makes you feel better — maybe it makes you marginally safer. All I ’m saying is, helmets are not a panacea. And most importantly, when you hit the slopes with your American Express card, don’t leave home without your good judgment.

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.it FB: No argument there. Even to my mind, good judgment would go further than some of the proposed helmet laws that were floating around last year — like the one across the lake in New York.

Just a simple "th ank you" for your support, your business, your in p u t and your enthusiasm. Because o f you, I love coming to work each day! Happy holidays,

G U ESS IB

Katy DH: Amen. Talk about being contrary to the spirit of skiing and riding. Both sports have grand traditions of pioneers going to the mountains to find freedom and challenge.

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FB: True, but you’re also over looking the more recent history of people suing resorts for not marking every little hazard, or when they fall and hit their heads on a rock. DH: That’s just my point: Let’s keep skiing and riding free from the “pad it, insure it, and when all else fails, sue it” men tality. We need an outpost of sanity. Keep the helmet laws and all the attendant peer pres sure off my head — it makes me dizzy. FB: Well, that’s obvious. But we’re at the top now. Do me a favor —- while we’re riding today, use your head.

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cousins the Tabloid Readers, Other random observations: they perform a useful function In America one tips 15, even in the social ecosystem: They 20, percent, in England a riving up 89 to St. Albans remind us that our little coun miserly 12. In America drivers the other day, I chanced try is a better place with those on something strange and generally tailgate, whereas in colonels in safe retirement. England we don’t, but we will nasty. A huge pool of dried Justice is kept very separate try to run you off the road if blood had spread across the from revenge. you stray below 105 miles per north-bound lanes, and at On Planet USA, it seems hour. In America, people ask roughly the four points of the that wronged individuals, who you how you’re doing and compass lay four large furry quite naturally want a say in expect an answer, but in hooves. The obvious explana what happens to those who England an answer is frankly tion was that a moose, wander have wronged them, are more unwelcome. ing across the road at night, and more able to have that say. All in all, my learning curve had met an abrupt end. But Families of murder victims can has been steep but pleasant. this particular moose had been witness the execution of the Yesterday, for instance, I discov pretty much atomized. There murderer. Victims are being ered that certain shoe stores will were no skid marks, and no consulted by judges as to the mangled truck. The only logical oil your boots for free, indefi most fitting punishment for nitely, and give you free laces explanation seemed to be some whatever crime has been com when you need them. And kind of “X Files” event. In mitted. Burlington is a truly lovely northern Vermont, aliens have It’s all too easy for the place to have as a new home. obviously turned to abusing Limey Alien to conclude that But like any alien worth his moose for their scientific ends this trend towards what one salt, I’ve been trying to glean a or, what the heck, just for jol might call “People’s Justice” has picture of the country at large, lies. progressed from the middle and since we don’t have a televi As coming across a ton of pages of the newspapers to a pulverized ungulate will do, this sion, this means reading the kind of de facto reality. This newspaper. Quite frankly, I’m got me thinking. I’m a bit of an cannot be a good thing. The disturbed. alien myself, having arrived here law exists to protect people I find myself in a country from England just a couple of from those who would flaunt whose jails are full to bursting, weeks ago to settle with my the boundaries of an ordered but whose citizens are clamor wife, a returning Vermonter. society, but also — and equally ing for more custodial sen While not exactly a distant importantly — to protect soci tences, harder time, longer galaxy — we share a language ety from itself. Justice by the stretches; a country that and the ubiquitous American requires ID in order to make an people for the people has always pop culture — England is dif boiled down to one thing: the increasing number of everyday ferent enough that I’m feeling lynch mob. purchases; a society in which surprisingly disoriented. And Lynch mobs are invariably reading the newspapers has only secular Puritanism is burgeon mftde up of frightened, angry ing while common sense and made things worse. folk. But what is America so rationality are losing respect. Just as aliens hovering over scared of? Violent crime is on I didn’t realize that the Fairfax might have concluded the decrease. People are living that highways were built by and United States had a judicial sys longer lives, and living them as tem based on personal revenge, for the use of huge antlered healthier, more fulfilled individ but apparently blind justice is mammals, I’ve been arriving at uals. Your country is on top of being offered early retirement. all sorts of odd conclusions of the heap, and looks set to stay Something called “Camp my own, most of them perhaps Vermont” has been causing par there for a good long time. The just as misguided. economy is booming. W hat ticularly obsessive outbursts. I’m not talking about cul horrible thing is it that remains Personally I think the concept ture shock, although that does under the bed, stopping you all is delightful — no longer can come in many odd forms. For from turning out the light and example, did you know that the inmates be assured that “this having a good night’s shut-eye? ain’t no holiday camp,” because British fold their toilet tissue, Could the answer be that the in fact it is! Flow civilized. whereas Americans are scrunchLand of the Free fears freedom Unfortunately, a hovering ers? I’d heard and dismissed this itself? alien might discern something act somewhere down the line, I confess that I’ve never much scarier afoot. On Planet ut it’s true: Your tissue is diathought of freedom that much. UK we have a species known as olically thin and requires a In the UK we’re stuffy and Retired Colonels, who splutter efty fistful to accomplish anyuptight, of course, but we don’t and mutter about how much hing useful, whereas our have a whole lot of laws that oughty UK brands require but corporal punishment they the average chap or chapess received as youngsters and how o chunky sheets folded on need worry about breaking. But terrific it was, and how hanging he dotted line to finish the job. here, personal freedom seems to small difference, perhaps, but should be brought back as a be both an article of faith and a deterrent to shoplifters. They n its own way as significant as legal impossibility. If the Feds riving on the wrong side of , write letters to the Times and aren’t telling you to do some everyone politely ignores them. e road. thing, the State is. When the But, along with their less-shy

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State butts out, the City is there waving the statute book. And if all else fails, there’s always your self. I would like to believe that I am joining a society whose members are confident that they, their compatriots and gov ernors will keep life happy and healthy. But I worry that the famous pioneering spirit — no small part of the aura that sur

Surely grievance does not entitle us to anything other than a snit-fit. As much as it is anything, life is a series of things that piss us off, inter spersed with a few, or hopefully a lot, of things that make us happy. Seeking to protect every one from everything only makes the law absurd. I already know that I can be carded for trying to buy cigarettes if I look

While not exactly a distant galaxy — we share a language and the ubiquitous^ merican pop culture — England is different enoug that I’m feeling surprisingly isoriented. And readinp i the newspapers has onl0 7 made things worse. rounds your country — has met a frontier it cannot tame. If you cannot trust yourself, how can you trust your neighbors? If the person next to you might be a gunman, a drunk driver, a smoker, where does safety lie? And if you believe that your well-being is threatened by the lifestyles of your neighbors or even yourself — and that such threats are serious enough to require preventative legislation — what will salvage your sense of proportion? It seems that refuge is being sought in a para dox: ensuring freedom from fear by a continual tightening of government’s chains. Don’t be surprised if your neighboring state’s license plates start read ing, “Live Free or Die from V . Passive Smoking.” .If everyone believes that they deserve protection from at least one anti-social activity or mere annoyance, the inevitable result for the open society is that each individual will have to accept at least one legal fetter over and above those related to public order and common sense. An acceptance of con straint as the price of freedom: a snake eating its own tail.

december 16, 1998

under 30, but that I can also buy a hunting rifle through the classifieds as “a Christmas gift free from government paper work.” “So this is how you repay our hospitality,” I can imagine you muttering. “Love it or leave it.” Actually, I do love it here, and I know how lucky I am to be let in. One of the nicest things about Burlington is that its citizens really do understand how fortunate they are to live in such a place. But there seems to be a mood in the wind that can bode nothing but ill for America as a whole — and what happens in America will, sooner rather than later, affect the rest of the world. England is only a matter of months behind you. I know I’m not alone in thinking that the raft of good sense and self-regulation is sink ing in a heavy sea o f reaction and fear. I also know that I’m not alone on this raft. I haven’t a clue what do about it, except to make a fuss in my quaint Q U A T old-world accent, so here goes: “I say, you State Legislature chaps...” ®

By Marialisa C alta he Iron W olf restaurant in Burlington, which closed this past summer, was long on cuisine and short on ambiance in its miniscule Lawson Lane quarters. Chef Claus Bockwold’s exceptional culinary prowess was compro mised by small, cramped tables, fake hanging plants, and a sound system emit ting hum-drum oldies. The enormous mahogany and marble bar seemed to intrude like a large, unwanted guest. But Steven Perei Jr., owner of the new Opaline, has man aged to transform the space into a vibrant, lively restaurant where the design and food work together. Swingy jazz fills the air. A large, Art Nouveau reproduction, “The Old Absinthe House,” dominates one wall. Full-length lace cur tains replace the cafe curtains on the etched-glass windows. The tiny tables have been replaced by slightly more gen erous, and vastly more com fortable, ones, covered in luxu rious white linen. Textured curtains drape the columns flanking the bar, simultaneous ly separating the bar space and bringing the room together. As a result the bar now is an inte gral part of the restaurant, and has its own distinct menu. O n the night my husband and I ate at Opaline, the place had the feel o f a really good private party, with great music, the hum o f happy chatter, the clink o f glasses, and the fra grance of food cooking wafting through the air. The crowd

seemed exceptionally young, hip, and well turned out, but nobody seemed to mind our dowdy, middle-aged presence. Perei — a 1989 graduate of the University of Vermont — fell into the restaurant business by a combination of accident and inclination. He managed the dining room at the Inn at Shelburne Farms, then gained

more experience at the Ritz Carlton in Naples, Florida and the Summer House on Nantucket. This summer, Perei returned to discover the vacat ed Iron Wolf space — in a turn-of-the-century building in back of Carbur’s — and decid ed to take the plunge with his own place.

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“I looked around Burlington and I saw lots of restaurants, but not many finedining ones,” says Perei. “And I loved the size. I didn’t think that, offering this fine-dining experience, I could fill 30 tables a night.” In fact, Opaline seats a total of 30. Perei contacted Frenchborn chef and Fairfield resident Denis Chauvin and Scott Stillman, a graduate of the New England Culinary Institute who also trained in France. W ith the help of a few more kitchen and wait staff, he opened the restaurant in midOctober. Perei named his place after opal, a popular color in the Art Nouveau movement, which was current at the time the brick building housing his restaurant was built. “I wanted to capture a historic feel, “ he says, explaining his choice of background music — “Paris hot club” tunes exemplified by the music of Django Reinhardt and Stephane Grappelli. The menu lists heavily toward the Gascony region of southwestern France, and seems to cover all the bases except vegetarian. There is fish, however, and special requests are honored. Eight entrees, ranging in price from $14 to $22, included poached red fish served with wild rice and gin ger garlic sauce, a seafood mix ture in a champagne sauce on puff pastry, grilled steak, rack of lamb and chicken in maple mustard sauce. My dish of cassoulet ($14) was satisfying, with a generous portion of duck nestled atop a bed of white beans, bacon and lamb-and-garlic sausage. My husband’s plate of Roasted Duck Opaline ($17) was impressively presented — slices of duck surrounding a vertical roasted duck leg — and included deliciously creamy scalloped potatoes. Appetizers included an escargot in garlic and cream sauce served in puff pastry, duck confit on a bed of spinach topped with black bean vinaigrette, marinated salmon and Caesar salad. Our choices were fine: a sweet, almost nutty onion soup ($3.25) and a ragout of veg etables ($4.50) in a tomato sauce flavored with savory. The bar menu is inviting, including some of the full menu offerings as well as two pasta dishes ($6.50 each), a couple of sandwiches (duck and a smoked turkey-andbacon, about $7 each) and a Tortiere du Jour ($6.50) which I plan to try next time. The wine list at Opaline is relatively small (about 30 offerings) and intriguing,

with a particularly alluring selection of Southern French reds and wines from the Rhone Valley. Knowing little about wine, and always aware of our budget, we asked Perei to choose a bottle from the low end of the price list. He select ed a Chateau La Roque ($25) that delighted us and perfectly complemented our food. We were so entranced with the wine, in fact, that we bypassed dessert and finished the bottle with a plate of cheese. This is not on the menu but is well worth asking about. Cheeses are $2 per one-ounce serving, and we sampled a spectacular, fabulously smelly, strong and

My idea of a great and gastronomically satisfying evening, in fact, would be a wine and cheese tasting at Opaline. beefy Alsatian Munster, which bears no resemblance whatso ever to its bland German cousin at the grocery store. We also sampled a part skim-milk goat cheese. Next time I want to try the Livarot from Normandy, a cheese with a venerable history — it dates from the 13th century — and a striped red raffia rind that gives it its nickname, “the colonel.” My idea of a great and gastronomically satisfying evening, in fact, would be a wine and cheese tasting at Opaline. Your idea of a great evening may be a drink at the bar — Perei touts his “Colossal Martinis” made with Colossal Spanish olives — a bowl of lobster bisque, or a soup-tonuts blow-out. I think even die-hard Iron Wolf fans will be pleased. 0

O p alin e, One Lawson Lane, B u rlin g ton , 6 6 0 - 8 8 7 5 . Open for lunch M on d ays through Friday, 1 1 :3 0 a .m . - 2 p .m ., and for d in n er M o n d a y to S atu rd ay, 6 - 9 : 3 0 p.m . R eservatio n s re co m m e n d ed . A ll m a jo r c re d it c ard s and lo c a l c h e ck s a c c e p te d . H a n d ic a p p e d a c c e s s ib le .

page 50 ~ iEVEN DAYS

. december 16, 1998

deadline: monday, 5 pm • phone 8 0 2 .8 6 4 .5 6 8 4 • fax 8 0 2 .8 6 5 .1 0 1 5 L IN E ADS: 2 5 words for $ 7 . Over 2 5 words: 3 0 0 a word. Longer running ads are discounted. Ads m ust be p repaid . D ISP LA Y ADS: $ 1 3 . 0 0 per col. inch. Group buys for e m p lo ym e n t display ads are available w ith th e Addison In d ep en d en t, th e S t. A lb an ’s M essenger, th e M ilto n In d e p e n d e n t and th e Essex R eporter. Call for more details. VIS A and M A S TER C A R D accepted.

E M P LO Y M E N T EM P LO Y M E N T EM P LO Y M EN T BUSINESS RECORD LABEL SEEKS PARTOFFICE MANAGER/PROJECT ACCOUNTANT: PART-TIME. OPP. TIME OFFICE/MARKETING ASST, for small architectural 10 -20 flexible hrs. with excel lent pay. Minimum 2-yr. Accounting degree and 2 yrs. experience. Quickbooks and tax experience preferred, com puter experience required. Please mail or fax resume/work history to: RWR, Inc., 100 Dorset St., Suite 19, So. Burlington, VT 05403. Fax: 862-0103.

CHILD DEVELOPMENT. Ceative souls needed for Director, staff positions. Waterbury Pre-school, infant/ toddlers program. Pay for experience/education, medical for full-tim e. BA preferred. F/T & P/T. 879-0764.

INDEPENDENT MARKETING associates needed to sell 26year-old legal services plan. Unlimited income potential; training provided. Call Sam Kutner, Independent Associate, at 863-7953. Email: zjzy58a@prodigy.com.

firm. Should be flexible, have strong organizational skills, basic accounting knowledge, able to work independently, and be motivated to provide project support in addition to general duties. Interest in design and Macintosh experi ence preferred. Cover letter and resume to GKW Working Design, P.0. Box 1214, Stowe, VT 05672.

PART-TIME OFFICE COORDI NATOR. World Citizen Foundation, a small non-profit, seeks coordinator for 20 hrs./wk. $9/hr. Macintosh & organizational skills req. Duties include correspon dence, database maintenance, light bookkeeping, administra tive support, and some fun things, too. Experience with FileMaker Pro & Pagemaker a +. Fax resume & cover letter to 802-864-6878. Attn: Deputy Executive Director.

Vermont Campus Compact seeks dynamic Americorps Promise Fellow to n a m e start ip at this exciting new ananlzattoi lor 1 year I serve as weaker el tke Cerp. tor National Service's taerlcarps program. Includes living stipend it 313X, basic health Ins., I an elncadan award el $4,725. Pesltlia starts late Jan. 1889 & Is based at the Vt Campus Ceapact efllce at Mlddlebnry CaOege. r Respuslbllldes: in cite visits to assess & document current service efferts; anther inanai Skills Bank paWIcaUen; help develnp & coordinate trainings tor lacntty, staff & students; assess ceaamity needs by conducting meetings with agencies & their csnsdtoeuts. Qualifications: excaBeat organizational, oral, written I Interpersonal commnnicadon skills, nbllty to work Independently; adndnistratjve skills In program organization & imptonuntotton,travel within the state required. Far mere Information er te receive an application, please call < . Tiffany Sargent nt (802) 443-3103 er email at

assistant. Excellent organiza tional skills, good phone required. Fax cover letter/ resume to 802-865-2406.

RESTAURANT ASST. MANAG ER: Demanding job in highvolume brew pub. Strong work ethic in restaurant manage ment & exp. a +. Responsibil ities include: training, motivat ing & supervising up to 20 staff on a shift. Must be a nat ural leader, quality-conscious, organized, even-tempered, and work well under pressure. Apply at VT Pub & Brewery, corner of College & St. Paul St., Burlington.

BUSINESS OPP. FOR TANNING/RETAIL — in a wellness spa/salon. Call for details: Fort Tresses, 655-8202. Open 6 days/week.

PATENTED LONG-DISTANCE BY INTERNET. No computers or black boxes. Telephone-toTelephone FLAT RATE = ltf/m in. or less! Searching for qualified leaders for launch. (877) 892-6063.

PERFECT PART-TIME HOME Business. Unlimited income, local support, hands-on train ing. 24-hr. message. Toll free, 1-888-574-9678.

SALES/CUSTOMER SERVICE: Full-time, counter/sales regis ter knowledge helpful. Friendly. Flexible schedule. Competitive wage. Breadsmith, 1162 Williston Rd„ So. Burlington. 863-5533.

TUTOR/MENTOR: Writing asst, needed to help adult learner w/ research, editing and structur ing time to complete extensive research paper. Short-term from Dec.— May, 1999. $ 10/hr. Call Marlene Williamson, 658-3323.

$800 WEEKLY POTENTIAL Processing Government Refunds at Home. No Experience Necessary. 1-800696-4779 ext. 1394.

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V O LU N TEER S BIG HEAVY WORLD SEEKS volunteers to help w/ the Web site. Into graphics, Web work, music & Burlington? Come rock w/ us! Call 373-1824 (www.bigheavyworld.com).

OFFICE/BUSINESS/STUDIO SPACE BURLINGTON: Therapist’s Space. Join the staff of Associates in Bodywork. A beautiful space: $135/mo. Downtown location. Opening avail, now. Call Susan, 660-9808. BURLINGTON: Offices for holistic health practitioners. Pathways to Well Being, 168 Battery St., Burlington. 862-0836.

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OFFICE/BUSINESS/STUDIO SPACE BURLINGTON: Office available in historic building. Prime downtown location. Parking. Warehouse and shipping avail able on premises. $500/mo. Call 862-0933.

APT./H O U SE FOR R EN T BRISTOL: 1-bdrm. apt., above Bristol Market, full bath, screened-in porch. $500/mo., heat & elec. incl. Dep. & refs, req. Call Kim, 802-453-2448.

BURLINGTON: Beautiful 3bdrm. Walk to water & down town. $930/mo. + utils. Avail. 2/1. Call 862-4042 for show ing times.

H O U S EM A TES W ANTED BURLINGTON: 1 or 2 non smoking M or F. Downtown, off-street parking & storage. $200-$350/mo., heat incl. Avail. 1/1. 863-9572 or 860-0040 ext. 203. BURLINGTON: Roommate for 2-bdrm., St. Paul St., porch, yard, storage, W/D, & cat. Smoker OK, open-minded. Good cheap living for $250/ mo. + utils. + dep. 860-6651.

BURLINGTON: Prof./grad to share 3-bdrm. house in So. End.; W/D, off-street parking. Avail. 1/1. Call 652-9099 any time.

H O U S EM A TES W AN TED BURLINGTON: Room in musi cians’ household on Spear St., overlooking Lake Champlain & the Adirondacks. Huge patio & field. Avail, immediately. $300/mo. Call Mark T. or Mark B „ 864-0873. BURLINGTON: Townhouse on Centennial Crt.; 2-bdrm. ready for 1/1. $300/mo. + utils. Prof ./grad preferred. Call Todd, 660-1911, leave message. BURLINGTON: 1 extremely spacious room avail, in 6 bdrm. house. Amiable neigh borhood, near campus, W/D. $360/mo. + utils. Call Andrew, 863-6028. BURLINGTON: 1 or 2 people to share 4-bdrm. house w/ . prof, woman, 8 -yr.-old girl and pets. 2 bdrms. avail, for $400$500/mo. + utils. Great loca tion. Pets & kids negotiable. 862-2026. BURLINGTON: Furnished, pri vate room and bath. Kitchen priveleges, laundry, on bus line, parking. $425/mo. Avail, now. Call 864-4873. BURLINGTON: Furnished, shared bath, phone, clean, quiet. No smoking or pets. Walk to everything. $400/mo., incl. all. 862-3341. BURLINGTON: Housemate wanted to share unbelievably beautiful, spacious house. Looking for someone who is responsible, clean and willing to live w/ 3 people and a won derful chocolate lab. Parking, W/D. Avail. 1/1. Call 8629601.

BURLINGTON: 2 people look ing for roommate ASAP. Must be employed, responsible & respectful. Great 3-bdrm. on No. Union. Lots of bennies. $233/mo. Bryan or Shanna, 658-8845.

THE SEVEN DAYS WINTER FICTION ISSUE c

d e c e mb e r 22 call 864.5684 for information and a d r a t e s that boy from second grade who used to bark like a dog

please note: refunds c a fm o tb ^ ra n te d fo ra n y reason, adjustments will be credited to the advertiser’s account to w a rd fu tu r^ la s s m e d T p iac e !^ ^ even so, jmistakes can occur, report errors at once, as seven days, will not be responsible -for errors continuing beyond the first printing, adjustment for error is limited to repubiication in any event, liability for errors (or omissions) shall not exceed the cost of the space occupied by sycti an error (or omission)-, all advertising is subject to review bv seven davs seven I. days. M M & lM b right to edit; properly cMegorize dK&fetimrany ad without comment or appeal.- -r __________ * J y aay5, seven

7D Classifieds • 864.5684 AU TO M O TIV E WINTER RESTORATION PROJECT? 1967 VW Squareback. Has: 12K mi. on l,6 0 0 cc engine, good trans., new brakes, new muffler, re-built carbs., little rust, inspected. Needs: heater, minor work & paint job. Owner unable to restore. $2,500. Call Gary, 658-9380.

NEEDACARP

LINGO-LADEN EXCUSE D e a r Tom a n d Ray: M y loser fr i e n d keeps a sk in g m e to j u m p - s t a r t bis loser car. I'v e done i t a b o u t f i v e tim es a n d I ’m a b o u t ready to te ll h im w here he can p u t his ju m p e r cables. Is m y b a tte ry g o in g to s u ffe r fr o m a ll o f th is ju m p - s ta r tin g ? M y H o n d a C iv ic is three years o ld a n d I h a v e n 't h a d to replace th e b a tte ry y e t, b u t I 'm s ta r tin g to worry. Is there som e tec h n ica l, c a r-lin g o -la d e n excuse I can g iv e h im f o r w hy I c a n 't help h im o u t n e x t tim e his j u n k heap dies? — B ra d

w hen th e m ech a n ic ta lk s to me Like I have d e a d space in m y head. C an y o u te ll m e i f I 'm g e t tin g g o o d a d v ic e fr o m C huck? — Louise

D e a r Tom a n d R ay:

T O M : W ell, to o ts ... RAY: Ju st k id d in g , L ouise. A ctually, I th in k C h u c k is g iv ing you p re tty good advice. S ince he w orks at a Jeep d e a le r sh ip , he know s so m e th in g you d o n 't — th a t th e en g in e is p ro b a b ly g o in g to blow on th is C h e ro k e e lo n g befo re y o u 'v e g o tte n y o u r m o n ey 's w o rth o u t o f a tra n sfe r-c a se re b u ild . T O M : T h e o n ly p ro b le m w ith th is advice is th a t th e re 's no easy way to ch eck th e flu id level in th e tra n sfe r case. You have to craw l u n d e r th e car to ch eck it, w h ich is n o t very c o n v e n ie n t — especially in th o se n ice, w h ite n u rs e 's u n ifo rm s. RAY: A ctually, you really have to get th e car on a lift and rem ove th e plu g , so it's so m e th in g you have to have d o n e at a gas s ta tio n or garage. T O M : So b efo re you im p le m e n t th e "C h u c k A p p ro a c h ," you need to g et an id ea a b o u t how fast it's leak in g . H ave C h u c k to p it up fo r y ou, an d th e n com e back in a m o n th a n d ask h im to ch eck it again . I f it's all leak e d o u t an d th e tra n sfe r case is ru in e d , th e n y o u 'll k n o w it was in th e stars an d you can have th e re p a ir d o n e , or lo o k for a n o th e r car. RAY: I f it h a s n 't all leak ed o u t, have C h u c k m easu re how m u ch flu id it takes. You m ay fin d th a t you o n ly have to ch eck it every tw o or th re e m o n th s. A nd th a t w o u ld n 't be so bad . T O M : A t som e p o in t, th e leak w ill get w o rse, b u t by th e n , you m ay have w on th e lo tte ry — or seized th e e n g in e . G o o d lu ck , Louise!

I h a v e a 1 9 9 4 Jeep C herokee w ith 1 1 5 ,0 0 0 m ile s . M y p r o b le m is, th e car has s ta r te d to lea k f l u i d f r o m th e tra n sfe r case. T he

W h a t's one secret o f f i n a n c i a l sucess? D r iv i n g a used car! R e a d H o w to B u y a U sed C ar: T h in g s

RAY: U n fo rtu n a te ly , no, Brad. J u m p -s ta rtin g som eo n e else's car is ju s t like d o n a tin g a p in t o f b lo o d . A few days later, y o u 'd never k now it h a p p e n e d . T O M : It's ju s t like s ta rtin g y o u r ow n car one m ore tim e. So it h ard ly m akes a d ifferen c e in th e life o f y o u r b attery . RAY: T h a t d o e s n 't m ean we c a n 't h elp you, th o u g h , B rad. If h e's o u t-w o rn his w elco m e, w e'll be h a p p y to help you m ak e up a te c h n ic a l-s o u n d in g excuse. T O M : Tell h im th a t ele c tro n d rain d u rin g a ju m p -s ta rt is m ag n ified by A v o g a d ro ’s n u m ber, an d th e tie -in b etw een C o u lo m b s Law an d th e H ie se n b e rg U n c e rta in ty P rin c ip le m akes it u n w ise to p e rfo rm any m o re th a n five ju m p -s ta rts in a given year. T h e n th ro w in som e referen ce to global w a rm in g an d v io la tio n s o f th e S o u th e a s t A sian T reaty O rg a n iz a tio n , an d he sh o u ld get th e idea. RAY: O r ju s t tell him y o u 're w a tc h in g "B uffy th e V am p ire Slayer" and he sh o u ld c h eck th e Yellow Pages u n d e r "AAA."

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SERVIC ES

BURLINGTON to SUGARBUSH.

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RICHMOND to ESSEX JUNC TION: I am looking for a ride to

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work M-F, generally 9 to 5, but can be very flexible. (3059)

UNDERHILL to BURLINGTON: I am looking for a ride to work MF, 8:30 to 5. (3055)

BARRE to BURLINGTON. I am a student looking for a ride M,W,F, 8 a.m. Flex, return. (3051)

CASH: Have you sold property

HINESBURG to BURLINGTON. I

and taken back a mortgage? I’ll pay cash for all your remaining payments. (802) 775-2552 x202.

am looking for a ride to the UMall M-F, around 9:30 a.m. (3040)

GRAND ISLE to BURLINGTON.

TELEPHONE JACK IN STALL ATIONS/REPAIRS. Quality work,

I’m looking to share driving on a smoke-free commute to work. . Hours are M-F, 9 to 6 , some flex. (3038)

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SO. BURLINGTON to MILTON. I

I’m a working student looking for a ride Tues. or Weds, to Burl ./returning Fri. or Sat. eve to Middlebury. (3035)

MORRISVILLE to WILLISTON.

P" V

BURLINGTON to U-MALL. I am being relocated to the mall and am seeking ride M-F/S, 9 to 6 . (2999)

RICHFORD to BURLINGTON. I

I’m looking to share driving on my trek to work. Hours are M-F, 8 to 4:30. (2997)

work weekends and am looking to share driving. Hours are 6 a.m. to 6:30 p.m. (3001)

BURLINGTON to WILLISTON. I

HYDE PARK/JOHNSON to WILLISTON. I am looking to

am currently earless and looking for a ride to work M-F. My hours are 8:30 to 4:30. (3031)

SWANTON to ST. ALBANS. I am a late sleeper looking for a ride to work at noon. I work M-F, noon to 7 p.m. or later. (3033)

BURLINGTON to SO. BURLING TON. I am a recent arrival to town looking for a ride to work M-F, 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. (3028)

BURLINGTON to COLCHESTER. I am a teachers’ aide looking for a ride to Colchester. My hours are 8 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. (3026)

am working on a house in Milton for a month and seeking a ride to the site M-F at 7 a.m. (3036)

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M1DDLEBURY to BURLINGTON.

I am a ski bum working at Sugarbush this season looking to share driving to/from the moun tain. My hours are 8 to 4, vary ing days. (3022) WINOOSKI to ESSEX JCT.: I am looking for a ride to IBM. I work 7 p.m. to 7:30 a.m., schedule varies. (3024)

share driving on my long trek to work. Hours are M-F, 8:30 to 5. (2997)

PLATTSBURGH/GRAND ISLE to BURLINGTON. I am a nurse working the graveyard shift, 1 1

IW I r

A ,

BURLINGTON to JEFFERSON VILLE. Would you like to have company on your commute to work 2 or 3 days per week? I’m witling to ride along or share the/ driving. Work 7:30 to 5 p.m. (2892)

BURLINGTON to SHELBURNE. With all the construction on Shleburne Rd. & only one person in most cars, how about helping reduce the congestion? I’d like to ride w/ someone & willing to pay. Work 8 to 4:30, M-F. (2905) BURLINGTON to STOWE. I'd like to hook up with someone and share the ride to work. I work 8 to 4:30 p.m., M-F with some flexibility. (2906)

to 7, various days of the week. I’m looking to share driving with someone dependable. (2993)

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k k tT k T N

BURLINGTON to WILLISTON. am a new arrival to the area looking for a ride to and from work. My hours are 8-5, but I’m flexible. (2985)

from the secret files of t h e b e c k o n in g a p e r t u r e o f d is m a y

Q g n n O

Ted, are you coming downstairs tor dinner?

C LEA N IN G SERVIC ES

G ood god, Ted. Y o u ’ve been in there for four hours. That water must be nearly ice-cold by now .

Couldn’t really say, hon. The six quarts of cream of m u sh ro o m soup inside my wetsuit are still deliciously w arm .

HO! HO! HO! AND LET’S BE JOLLY! Forget the chores and hang the holly...but first, call Diane H., housekeeper to the stars. 658-7458. “ She put asmile on my face and joy in my heart!” — Kriss Kringle.

The

Straight -v M'h I! ' 1l v r " 'A w ? |2 V~ - if» i

Dear Cecil, What’s the story with the mysterious hum in Taos, New Mexico? I remember it was a popular subject among screw balls and scientists with nothing better to do in the early 90s, but I haven’t heard much about it since. Is it a seismic phenomenon? Alien signals? Why can only certain people hear it and not others? — Tokamak, via AOL Little Ed forwarded your letter with the note, “What does the hum hum? If it was, like, ‘Mandy’ or something,

this would tell us something fundamental about the cos mos. And scary.” That Ed, always the alarmist. We alerted the New Mexico contingent of the Straight Dope Science Advisory Board, Ian and Jill. They reported as follows: • Neither Ian nor Jill had heard the hum, but Ian thought his mother had. On inquiring, however, he learned that it wasn’t his mother, it was a friend of his mother’s, and said friend had heard it in Los Alamos, not Taos. But think about it: What’s in Los Alamos? The atom bomb lab! Whoa. • There is (of course) the Taos Hum Homepage at www.eskimo.com/-billb/hum/hum.html. Perusing said page, Ian found that major hum foci include Calgary and, um, Detroit. Ian, listen. You think Taos hum, you think: resonating with the deep vibe of the universe! Whereas with the Detroit hum you think: too much truck traffic. Stick with Taos. • With the excuse of doing an errand for her job, Jill went to Taos to investigate the hum firsthand. She heard no hum, though she did note an unusually high incidence of Steve Miller singing about the pompatus of love on the radio. She asked some guy (admittedly in Santa Fe) if he’d heard the hum. Guy said no, but he’d heard about a hum at Richardson Bay in Tiburon, California, that turned out to be fish mating. Great, says I. F**king fish. Memo to Jill: The locality of interest is Taos! T-A-O-S. Write this down. • Jill decided she should ask a Taos Indian about the hum, in case it figures in some ancient Pueblo tradition. She drove out to the bridge over the Rio Grande gorge. The wind whistling through this bridge, her coworker Mark had previously informed her, is the source of the Taos hum. Jill knows that everything Mark says is total crap, but fig ured she had to start somewhere. There was a Taos tribal police car on the bridge because, as it turned out, some body had thrown a dead body off it. Jill figured this was ~the perfect moment to ask the Native-American cop about the Taos hum: “He said, ‘Oh, it’s an old, old story.” Bingo!,

I asked, ‘How old?’ I wanted some Earth-mother-originalcreation-hum kind of myth. He said, ‘Oh, 10 years or so.’ Oh, well. He told me he can’t hear it and he doesn’t know any Indian people who can. He stopped short of telling me it’s a bunch of New Age white people’s crap.” • By now Jill was really getting into this and sent me a pile of clippings about the hum from the Albuquerque Journal. Seems the hum was first brought to public attention in 1992 by Taos residents who claimed they’d been hearing it for more than a year. Nine of 12 locals contacted by the paper said they’d heard it. The hum was said to sound like the distant idling of a diesel truck (a low rumble, in other words), and was very annoying. Theories about its source included “UFOs, spiritual rebirth, faulty sew'age plants, secret underground mining, high-voltage power lines, and weapons testing.” The New Mexico congressional delegation — you remember what a big help they were investigating the alien spacecraft at Roswell — decided to harness the vast resources of the federal government to find out what caused the hum. However, the Pentagon denied all, and tests by scientists at Sandia and Los Alamos national labo ratories and at the University of New Mexico (your tax dollars at work!) failed to detect the hum’s source. A survey of 7000 Taos-area residents found that only 2 percent had heard it. You’re thinking: You could probably find 2 per cent who think they’ve got microchips implanted in their brains! Hmm. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Sorry, thought I heard something. Anyway, UNM hearing researcher James Kelly tells me they’ve done enough investigation to know this is more than just wacky Taos residents eating funny mushrooms. For one thing, tests show all the hum hearers hear pretty much the same low-frequency tone, making it unlikely they’re imagining it or suffering from ordinary tinnitus. Research continues. Sure, it’s all in their heads. The ques tion is, what’s “it?” — CECIL ADAMS

Is there something you need to get straight? Cecil Adams can deliver the Straight Dope on any topic. Write Cecil Adams at the Chicago Reader, 11 E. Illinois, Chicago, IL 60 6 1 1 , or e-mail him at cecil@ chireader.com.

december f C l S P

SEVEN DAYS

page

.T V ' .>;v

Class TUTORING MATH, ENGLISH, WRITING, Science, Humanities, Proof reading, from elementary to graduate level. TEST PREP for GRE, LSAT, GMAT, SAT-I & II, ACT, GED, TOEFL...Michael Kraemer, 862-4042.

M USIC

M USIC INSTRUCTION

AMP: MARSHALL JCM 800 50 watt head & JCM 900 cabi net, $700. Call John, 434-5013.

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PETS

(Martin) DM-1. Great guitar. Will write songs for you, promise! $175 (firm) to a good home. Katherine, 652-0042.

BORDER COLLIE MIX FOR SALE: female, 4 yrs., white &

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S + o R y M i M u + 0 © | HE UNPERSTooP HoW PATlENTS'l ...ANP HlS ENTHUSIASM ANP J t i 'P . in^PTAi . t v / r», r .^ R o L l MlNPS WERE iNFLUENCEP BY I HEARTY ASSURANCES INCREASEP The. iMMOfCIALITy PiLL'# i A & m th e su ^ a r p u l s ... I th eir e f f e c t iv e n e s s . T ri£ PoCIoR WAS EXPERT AT APMlNlST£B.|N6 PLACEBOS.

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1L-&

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seven days * wellness directory december 16,199a

SEVEN DAYS.

page 55.

December 1 7 -2 3 ARIES

(Mar. 21-Apr. 19): Happy Holy Daze! If I could give you just one holiday gift, it might be the champagne recently salvaged from the Joenkoeping, a schooner that was sunk by a German U-boat in 1916. Though it had lain on the floor of the Baltic Sea all these years, the fizzy stuff reportedly tasted superb. I’d love for you to have a bottle of your own, Aries, because it would symbolize the wondrous resurrections in store for you in 1999. I believe lost pleasures and broken dreams will return to you in full working order — perhaps even better than they were originally.

TAURUS

(Apr. 20-May 20): The Neiman-Marcus catalogue has a fabu lous present I’d love to give you this holiday season. It’s a maze, literally. Artist Adrian Fisher comes to a loca tion o f your choice and constructs a full-size labyrinth using hedges, stones, bricks, waterfalls, iron gates, mirrors and any other materials at hand. W ith this as your practice field, Taurus, I’m sure you could garner the patience and mental agility necessary to meet all the psychological mazes that’ll challenge you in 1999. Unfortunately, the asking price is a hefty $250,000, so I can’t buy it for you. If you’d like to gift yourself, call 1-800-825-8000, ext. 6303 for more info.

GEM INI

(May 21-June 20): Happy Holy Daze, Gemini! If I could give you just one holiday gift, it might be the book by Erwin S. Strauss called H ow to Start Your O w n Country. It provides you with all you need to know about creating an empire orga nized around your personal values, which I believe you’ll soon be ready to attempt. And why am I so confi dent that your future will be magiste rial? Because my reading o f 1999’s planetary Zeitgeist tells me you’ll be able to handle maximum levels o f both freedom and responsibility.

CANCER

(June 21-July 22): The omens suggest that in 1999 you may

finally materialize a dream you’ve nourished in your imagination for years. Crucial to this success will be your ability to summon more ambi tion than ever before. I’m not talking about the grubby orgy of self-promo tion that normally passes for ambi tion in our culture, however. I mean soaring aspiration that seeks the best, not just for yourself but for everyone. I mean sacred hunger that propels you towards the tasks you came to Earth to accomplish. To aid your work, Cancerian, buy yourself this holiday present: a big, shiny, silver trophy depicting a robust human fig ure with arms upraised in triumph. Place it where where you’ll see it reg ularly, so that it can impress upon your subconscious mind your loom ing greatness.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Happy Holy Daze, Leo! If I could buy you just one holiday gift, it might be a Martian meteorite or a fossilized dinosaur egg or the fingerbone of St. Christopher, patron saint of travelers. Any o f these gifts could help put you in the right mood to embrace the exotic, primordial, far-flung chal lenges that 1999 will offer. But I also want to encourage you never to take yourself too seriously in the coming months, even in the face of the aweprovoking spiritual adventures that’ll sneak up on you again and again. I’m tempted, therefore, to give you some thing like a photo o f the Dalai Lama playfully messing with Desmond Tutu’s cap at a gathering o f Nobel Peace Prize winners. That, or the funnybone o f St. Vitus, patron saint of dancers and comedians. VIRGO

(Aug. 23-Sept. 22): I’d love to pump up your skill as a warrior in 1999. T hat doesn’t mean I hope you get in lots of fights and try to push people around. Rather, my goal is for

you to harness your anger more con structively and to act forcefully even in the face o f your fear. I also want you to use your intuition more dar ingly, Virgo, as you master the arts of strategy and good timing. To egg yourself on in these noble quests, I suggest you buy yourself a symbolic holiday gift that incites your impecca ble ferocity — a horned Viking hel met, perhaps, or a dragon-shaped blow gun from Borneo (both avail able from 1-800-634-9057). O r how about a leather biker vest or a “Xena the Warrior Princess” action figure?

LIBRA

(Sept. 23-Oct. 22): I’m quite confident you’ll be putting your jumbled romantic karma behind you in 1999, Libra. You’ll douse lingering attractions to the big teases who’ve frustrated you for so long. Unrequited love will either become very requited, or else you’ll get bored with the chase. And even if you do stay with your current consort, your life together will transform so much it’ll be as if you’re in a brand new relationship. To launch this glorious adventure, I suggest you perform the following solstice ritual. Buy yourself a photo album in which you mount one picture apiece of each of your ex lovers. Next, kiss their glossy faces and say a grateful prayer of goodbye to them all. Finally, build a blazing Yuletide fire in your hearth or down at the beach, and throw in your “Old Flame Memorial.”

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Telling a Scorpio to make intensive use of the metaphor of composting is like advising an aspiring author to read lots of good books and to write every day. In either case, it guarantees a steady march towards mastery. So just imagine how thrilled I am when I tell you that 1999 will be a time when every act of recycling will carry

three times its usual power to bring you closer to the heart of your des tiny. If I could give you just one holi day gift, in fact, it would be the stackable compost bin I saw in the Real Goods catalogue (1-800-7627325). Not only would this create nutrient-rich fertilizer for your gar den; it would also serve as a talisman for the m otif you should live by dur ing the coming months.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Happy Holy Daze, Sagittarius! If I were going to give you a holiday gift, it might be a Crackerjack box with a vial of love potion inside. Not that you’ll need any artificial help in stimulating romantic adventures in 1999: You. yourself will be a riveting aphrodisiac. For best results, however, it would be wise to cultivate a Crackerjack-like spirit in all things amorous, which is to say frisky and antic and full of surprises. CAPRICORN

(Dec. 22-Jan. 19): I’d love for you to ratchet up your levels of domestic bliss in 1999, but without rousing any sappy, lazy ener gies that might encourage you to fall into a complacent rut. T hat’s why I exhort you to buy yourself holiday gifts that bring an edgy spirit of fun into your home. Some suggestions: a table cloth featuring a m otif based on Van Gogh’s exuberant “Starry N ight;” a backwards wall clock in which the hands run counterclockwise; the party game Twister, which requires participants to crawl all over each other; prayer flags strung from win dow to tree, each bearing an outra geous wish written by you; an altar piled high with objects that feel both sacred and playful; and matching silk kimonos.

quarians are rarely control reaks. If anything, you tend [to be the exact opposite. ou’re so addicted to nervous energy that you periodically flirt with becoming delirious; you seem to feel a perverse comfort when chaotic fun is lurking. In 1999, though, I don’t think you can get away with indulging these inclina tions as often as you have in the past. In fact, I’ll be lobbying hard for you to become more of a well-organized mastermind. W ith this in view, I sug gest that you buy yourself a mari onette show or radio-controlled toy bulldozer this holiday season. Playing with either will give you good prac tice in manipulating your environ ment with more command.

PISCES (Feb. 19-Mar. 20): I would never give you a holiday gift like an electronic hand-sized bowling game, a tree ornam ent shaped like the Titanic, or a Detroit Red Wings 1998 commemorative puck. But lots of other people might be tempted to give you junk like that — not only now, in fact, but all through the com ing year. The best way to avoid this ignominious fate is to become very specific and aggressive about asking for what you really want. To do that, of course, you yourself are going to have to become much better acquainted with what you really want. (Hint: How about a tool that’ll give you more precise power to do your favorite work?) You can call Rob Brozsny, day or night for your

e x p a n d e d w e e k ly h o ro s c o p e 1 -9 0 0 -9 0 3 -2 5 0 0 S i . 99 par minute. 18 and over. Touchtone phone, c/a 8 1 8 /3 7 3-9 7 8 5 And don’t forget to check out

AQUARIUS

(Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Unlike some of the other signs, you

Rob’s Web site at urunu.realastrology.com/ Updated Tuesday night.

Crossword

last w eek’s

Chong 101 Melodious McEntire VIP 105 Eliot's “— 59 Private Bede" 60 “Hulk" 107 Man of La Ferrigno Mancha 61 Bruce or Laura 110 W hat m akes a 62 Actress podiatrist G ardner laugh? 63 Movie pooch 115 August 13th, 66 G reen org. 68 Hersey eg. 116 Copycat setting 117 Soft cheese 69 New York 118 They’re athlete bound to sell 70 Sensitivity 120 Lance part 73 Podiatrist's 124 Paper quantity kids? V .: ■ film 76 ’52 W inter 126 Graceland, 2 6 “Die Flederfor one maus" maid Olym pics site 7 7 Part o fE T A 129 Like an alert 2 7 G as gauge podiatrist? 2 9 — European 78 “— Baby" (7 4 hit) • 31 Limerick’s 131 Really big performer? land: abbr. 79 Pantry past 32 Actress Moore 80 Collar 132 Gloomy 133 G o against 34 W hy the po ornam ent diatrist never 82 Indian export Galahad 83 No, in 134 Cultural grp. married? 36A cto d as 135 Engineering Novosibirsk course arbiter 84 Graduation t 42 Spine start 136 Indigence 86 M ideastem 137 Ophthalmo43 Tend the garden logicat m elange 4 4 Suffix with problem 90 Ambiguous 138 Parent v 92 Dishonest 45 PDQ , politely DOWN podiatrists? 1 Uris’ “— 18’ 47 By means of 97 Certain shark 48 Presque — , 2 Confined to a 98 “Zip-A -D eeMaine D o o -— cot 3 Plaster 52 Like an 9 9 PC la y i ingredient unsuccessful 100 — Dawn ACROSS 1 French Sudan, today 5 Pluck 9 Fancy appetizer 13 Abbreviated address 17 Heron’s kin 18 Portend 19 M en’s hat style 21 Try again 22 Podiatrist’s fayorite dish? 24 Unlocked 25 '82 Disney

..a. page 56

podiatrist? 56 Classroom

4 King Mark's bride 5 “Saint Joan" monogram 6 Most capa cious 7 Eric of Monty Python 8 Choppers 9 Featherweight W illie 10 Citrus cooler 11 Pick-m e-up 12 Before this time 13 Clubber Lang’s portrayer 14 Cliff hanger? 15 Cherish 16 French impressionist 19 Bore no grudge 20 Confuse 23 — do-well 2 8 Velvet finish 30 Poem of praise 33 Stow ingredi ent 35 Mayberry moppet 36 Blue hue 37 Bank’s backup: abbr. 38 Designer Gem reich 39 North Caro lina campus 40 Deer child

december 16, 1998

41 Wonka s 88 Tree spray creator 89 Hand-me46 TV's “Real —" down 49 Hoaxes 91 Forsaken 50 Carpenter’s 92 Actress device Menken 51 Polyhymnia's 93 Pianist Lupu sister 94 — music 53 Tidy 95 In a mischie54 Horace’s “— vous manner Poetica” 96 Knight's quaff 55 Colossal 102 Dwindle 56 Rock’s — for 103 Uncovers Fears 104 Lurie or 57 Director LaPlaca Lubitsch 106 King G uzzle s 58 Year, in domain Yucatan 108 Fam ed loch 61 SHAEF 109 '87 W arren commander Beatty film 64 Actress 110 Pool shot Roberts 111 Beethoven 65 W rath wrote one 67 “The — Daba 112 Do a double Honeymoon" take, perhaps 68 Join 1 1 3 “— Call You 70 Ryan's Sweetheart" daughter 114 Alex Haley 71 Stadium work 72 Pottery defect119 M end, as a 74 Hobby-shop bone purchase 121 Top-notch 75 Move slowly 122 Chalky 76 Frigga’s cheese fellow 123 Autocrat 78 Sue — 125 — -jongg Langdon 127 Justice Fortas 81 News org. 128 Bandleader 85 Old hands Lewis 67 Pasternak 130 Ideologue's character suffix

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FUN, PASSIONATE & PRETTY. Loving, intelligent, holistic, athletic, adventur ous professional seeking her match: within 8 yrs. of 35 , well-educated, healthy, handsome. Enjoys nature & outdoor activities, and knows how to love!* 2419________________________

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SWF, 43, LOOKING FOR A SWM FOR LTR. Must be honest, hard-working and know how to treat a lady. Enjoy camp ing, fishing, comedy, karaoke and romantic times.. 2424 ^ ■. , > DWPF, NS, ACTIVE, ATTRACTIVE, artist/ farmer/educator; lover of fading laven der mnts. over water, ali that grows green, has hooves, paws, feathers, isn’t ftiade anymore, but still works, is graceful, resonant and natural. ISO kind, warm, wise, musical, communica tive, handy,- educated, art appreciator. NMH, RISD, ASO, NEA. 2427__________

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SEEKING HOPELESS ROMANTIC SWPF, NS, 5’ 8” , 24 , blonde, blue-eyed. ISO a spark w/ a hard-working, honest SM, 22 -35 , who enjoys dancing, biking, movies, hockey games & romantic evenings alone. 2326______________

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SWF, 44, 5’8", ATTRACTIVE, NO KIDS, atheist, loves dogs, extremely cynical, salving conscience through activist environmentalism, seeking peace/country life with gentle, honest mate. You are probably tall, preferrably no kids, 35 -53. thinker but work with your hands, not a veggie, principled, extremely liberal, patient. 2280_______

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loving, red Play-Doh, great legs, soft but tough Gemini. You: older than 34 , Frenchman, nice arms, good heart, cra zier than me, graying, coffee drinker, vulnerable, kid-loving Taurus. 2381__

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To P

our

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Phone blocked from dialing 9 0 0 numbers? Don't want a charge on your phone b ill?

1 - 9 0 0 - 3 7 0 - 7 1 2 7 $1.99 a minute, must be 18+.

R espond T o P ersonals U sing Y o n t C r e d it C a r d !

Call 1-800-710-8727 $l.99/min. must be 18+ wn *I u

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december 16,1998

SEVEN DAYS

page 57

O f V J

to respond to a personal ad call I - 9 0 0 - 3 7 O - 7 1 2 7 We’re open 24 hours a day!

n eckin g w cm m , c o n i

NEW-WORLD MAN. SWPM, 31 , NS/ND, very fit, adventurous, good-looking, into music, art, photography and going out, seeks SWF, 24-35, NS, for fun & possible LTR. 2409_________________

SCIENCE AND MUSIC ARE TWO LOVES

GIGGLES, PLAY & A SPIRITUAL LIFE.

of my life. Looking for a third. Affectionate, prof., honest, agnostic M, 49, seeks tall, thoughtful lady, NS, to enjoy outdoors and country living. 2422_____________________________

Sparkles & shiny colors at craft fair & the Met. Moussaka, pasta bolognese, massages, Bach with candle-lit bath. Mozart festival picnics, mtn., lake, sun sets & walks in the woods. Seeks SWPF. Unity reader a +. 2410_________

SINCERE, GOOD-NATURED CHRISTIAN M seeks F companionship on the journey. Love to laugh, learn, love. 2423______

ATTRACTIVE SWM, 32, SEEKS SF FOR friendship first w/ possibility of short term or LTR. Enjoy dining out, dancing, taking walks, movies, shows, skiing and other outdoor activities. 2425

LOVE IS A GOOD THING. DWM, s' 9", 145 lbs., somewhat professional, youthful, interesting. Likes adventures, skiing, hiking, camping, laughing, music, travel, Burlington night life. Seeking fun-loving companion. 2429

3 WAY-COOL ATTRACTIVE GUYS FROM The Outdoor Gear Exchange are look ing for outdoorsy, fun, quirky dates for the company X-Mas party, 12 / 20 . No commitments, just fun, food, and margaritas. Stop by the store and ask for Roger, Chief or Nupp. 2443__________

SWM ISO DARK-HAIRED LADY. I’m 25 , 5’ 7” , 145 lbs., light brown hair & eyes, and fit. Into snowboarding, cars, music and adventure. You: good-looking, open-hearted and playful. 2431_______

40ISH SM, 5’8”, FIT, EDUCATED, com municative, no dependents. Openminded realist, sense of humor, seeks special woman for monogamous holiday romance, and maybe more. 2356

SWPM, 31, NS, SELF-EMPLOYED, col lege grad., laid back personality, slight disability, enjoys movies, theater, ski ing, walking & dancing. Seeks SF with open heart, easy laugh and sense of adventure. 2366___________________

REAL 21ST CENTURY MAN...NOT A 20TH century imitation. Resilient, resolute, spiritual DWM, 41 , Ctrl. VT, seeks intel ligent and diverse, NS/NA, PC vixen to reformat life with. 2370_____________

COURAGEOUS & FREE, EMERGING spir it. Think and feel deeply. SWM, 25 , 5’ 7 ” , flexible, loveable, good-looking, intelligent, kind listener. Seeks friend ship, romance, fun. Likes lots of stuff. You are intelligent, kind, wise, fun, attractive, fit, 20 -30, 2371 ___________

THE MAN YOU’VE ALWAYS WANTED. I’m

sensitive, but strong, real romantic, handsome, fit, energetic. Would do ROAD LESS TRAVELED. Caring man anything for that special woman. 38, seeks special woman. I love drawing, 5’n ” , brown hair, blue eyes, love jazz, writing, poetry, photography, hik movies, dining out, traveling, long ing, running, children, nature, quiet times and being with someone special. : walks & silk lingerie. ISO SWF, NS, 35 NS, s’ 9” , 160 lbs. 2432_____________ • 40, childless, fun, romantic, affectionate & sexy. 2382___________________

GENTLE MAN, 50S, GOOD-LOOKING,

: SWM, 31, NS/NA/ND, 6’, BLUE EYES, brown hair, ex-Marine, fit—physically, ; mentally & spiritually. ISO SWF, 25 -35 , ; NS, NA, ND, loves nature & self. 2372 ; SWM, 41, NS, ND, ATTRACTIVE, organic gardener, loves dogs, home, rural life, SWM, 21, ATTRACTIVE, WITTY, LIKES movies, sports, cross-dressing, ISO SF : intimacy. ISO natural beauty, 30-35 , fearless, strong, loving, happy, to share who’s dominant, kinky, witty, who wears garter belts, sexy stockings, I my home, mother earth spirituality. leather for intimate encounters. Be j LTR. 2374___________ _____________ clean. Will answer all. 2436__________ • COME HITHER. SPEAK WITH TRUTH AND tenderness. Be of fit body and mind. SINCERE, SECURE, PHYSICALLY FIT, Value education, health and serenity. younger-looking-than-52 . Man with Cradle the heart of this gentle, unique, grown children seeking attractive, gracious SWM, 43, NS, ND, NA. 2383 healthy and loving 4oish woman to NEW TO BURLINGTON. SWM, 34, 180 share love and respect for natural world, travel, adventure and fun for the lbs., 6’ 2 ” , NS, social drinker. Enjoys long run. 2438_____________________ nature, outdoor activities, dancing. Looking for a woman who can show ISO XC SKI FRIEND. Active, attractive, me what this town has to offer. 2328 47 , 6’i ” , NS, kids, ISO ski friend. Also very solvent, amiably divorced, seeking intelligent lady who appreciates thoughtfulness, nice lifestyle. Let’s share interests. Goal: a committed relationship, 2435_____________

enjoy dancing, yoga, music, cooking. LTR possible, but fun first. No baggage on this trip, please. 2439____________

ATTRACTIVE, INTELLIGENT, MUSICAL, athletic, sober SWM, 32 , seeks similar qualities in SWF, 25 -30. 2393________ ARE YOU OVER 40, WITTY, INTELLI GENT, affectionate and—yes—attrac

38 YO TEENAGER. DWM, SMOKER, light drinker, likes all kinds of music—from alternative to Grateful Dead—ISO F ver sion of same. Skiing, fishing, outdoors, music, movies, etc. Let’s do it. 2332

I AM ALIVE! SWM, 36, HEALTHY, FIT & clean. 5’ 5” , 145 lbs., NS, likes to travel & hopes to meet SF, 26-40, NS, who enjoys life & stays active/healthy. 2348

SM, 42, SOME BRAINS, KINDA CU TEdeans up well—seeks friendship & intimacy in a LTR filled with silly laughter & sweet love. 2352_____________^ SEPARATED WM LOOKING TO BE some one’s special toy to play w/, enjoy life with and to sleep with. I’m in my 40s, good shape, have a job, but needs a place to live & be your personal slave to that special person. 2353_________ VIBRANT, INTELLIGENT WM, 36, health care prof, w/ European sensibilities & North American enthusiasm. Very ath letic, well-traveled. Loves inc.: music/ dance, get-a-ways to the woods & urban scene. Prefer 26-36, slightly cyni cal, possessing a good belly laugh. 2284____________________________

OPTIMISTIC, CHEERFUL, 43 YRS. YOUNG, educated (sometimes silly) WPM, ISO PF,. 30-43, happy, employed,

Seeks humorous, active, attractive WF, 25 -32 . Will reciprocate on massage. Perhaps. 2301_____________________

LIFE’S SIMPLE PLEASURES CAN BE shared with this DWM, 32 , 5’io ” , 165 lbs., average looks. Honest, hard-work ing outdoorsman. Likes country music, gardening, hunting, running, sunrise, quiet evenings & good company. 2288

STRONG & SILENT, EDUCATED, VERY busy, 6’, active, health club, mountain/ road bikes, skiing, outdoor activities, health-minded, movies, dancing, dinning out. Looking for best friend. 2295

YOUR BEST FRIEND FOR LIFE. Attractive, honest, sensitive, reliable DWM, 48, who likes to work out, ski, dance, ISO smart, sweet, caring, healthy, fun, romantic S/DF, 35 -48. 2296____________________________

42 YEARS OLD, 5’9", 216 LBS., ENJOYS dining out, movies, dancing, day trips, cuddling, quiet times. Looking for F with similar interests for friendship, possible romantic LTR. Holidays are coming! 2323_____________________

HANDSOME, TALL WM, 40, SEEKS attractive woman w/ a nice, big bottom & pleasant but passionate nature. Likes reading, conversation, passion & quiet times, too. Age, race unimportant. No obese, please. 2297_________

tive? Are you willing to risk an emo tional involvement? If yes, perhaps we should talk. 2400_______ ___________

one daughter. I’m a musician, inventor, hiker, photographer, blah, blah, blah, yadda, yadda, yadda. Let’s chat. 2334

gent female for sweaty activities. Looking for someone a little different and is comfortable w/ her body. 2302

M, 37, HONEST, DIVORCED, OCCASION AL smoker & drinker, kids: 2 teenage

WARM-HEARTED, INTELLECTUAL out doorsman, 42 , DWPM w/ children,

SWM, 20, DIRTY-BLONDE HAIR, BLUE eyes, 155 lbs., seeking older F, 35 -55 ,

girls. Self-employed in VT music ind. 2M l _____________________________

for discreet encounters. Will travel. Discretion a must. 2403

NON-PC, BOSTON-IRISH GENT, 38,

seeking serious, sensible, petite, pretty partner for hiking, back-country skiing & other adventures. Ctrl. VT. 2311

lbs., good-looking, quiet, smoker; can repair almost anything. Looking for one-man woman for LTR. What you see is what you get. 2405

O ykeS

ToWatchO il?

SWM, 22, 170 LBS. LOOKING FOR LTR. ISO attractive F who likes to cheat. I’m a clean-cut car guy. I make my woman happy. 2319

Winner also receives a gift certificate for a FREE Day Hiker’s Guide to VT from

la S o o r G e s r I used • closeout • new 191 Bank St., Burlington 860-0190

INTELIGENT, AFFECTIONATE, GOOD-

CTRL. VT DWM, 44, SLIM, SEEKING

looking, liberal, NS, passionate music lover. Enjoy outdoors, cooking, conver sation. Young 46, fit, not athletic. Seek smart, attractive, affectionate F in northeastern VT. I’m near St. J. 2317 _

equal partner for fun & sharing life’s good and bad times. Optimistic, confi dent and adventurous. You be the same. All replies answered. 2270_____

M, 50S, SEEKING NS F VEGETARIAN swinger...big band, that is. Some notes are blue; the mall buildings are, too. Read the clue, & I will meet you. 2321

SELF-EMPLOYED CONST. WORKER, 28, excellent cond. physically/ mentally/ spiritually. ISO a sexy lady who knows how to make a M feel like a M. 2250

SEMI-SERIOUS DWPM, 40S, LOVER OF museums, mtd. trails, carriage rides & lazy kisses. Attractive, balanced assort ment of virtues & vices. Seek confident lady open to life’s possibilities. 2251

MY FRIEND-LOVER FANTASY: Radiant, zestful, soulful, healthful, fit, athletic playmate. Intelligent, articulate, imagi native learner. Empathetic, giving, sen sual, loving, unguarded, centered, pow erful, independent yearner. Ready for me. 35-K 2252 _____________________ LIFE IS SHORT. A little bit shy, divorced for three years, & ready to start explor ing new adventures. I enjoy many out door activities, dining out or in, and good conversation. 2259 ____________

SMART, HEP, FUNNY, CUTE, GEMINI, native of NYC, been at school in VT for four years now. Seek funny, cool girl who likes fun and adventure. 2268

THE COMING MONTH & YEAR DO NOT exist. Ours only is the present’s tiny point. Romantic, NS, ND, 39, hand some, blue eyes, 6’, ISO pretty, sexy, smart, fun woman to share. 2271 _____ TALL, ATHLETIC FIT, ATTRACTIVE, affec tionate, progressive, well-educated, divorced, PS dad, 51 , likes conversa tion, ethnic food, films, tennis, hiking, skiing. ISO intelligent, active F for friendship/LTR. 2276 ______________

DWM, NS, MID-40S, LOVES LIFE’S pas sions. I’m youthful, creative, fun, gen tle, fit, adventuresome. Enjoy dancing, travel, hiking, kayaking, XC skiing, working out, gardening, art, antiques, food/wine. Have two part-time, live-in, wonderful children. ISO fit, NS, sensual lady, 33 -48ish, to share similar inter ests. Value humor, smiles, laughs, ten der touch, some spontaneity for quality friendship and/or LTR. 2246__________ SWPM, 34, MUSICIAN, HIKER, RURAL, folksy, literate. No kids, ex, or baggage. ISO harmonious F forever. 2242

I KNOW THAT what I’m doing now isn’t living. Fit DWM, 45 , ISO fit partner. No control either way. Want to share life’s adventures? Call, I don’t bite. 2248

ADVENTUROUS, FIT, OUTDOORSY DWM, 4oish, enjoys biking, hiking, canoeing, XC, etc. ISO attractive, fit, petite F w/ similar interests to enjoy outdoors, nature & hopefully more, 2260_______

1963 MODEL: WELL-MAINTAINED PROF. equipped w/ independent suspension, overdrive, ABS (attractive, bright, sensi tive), boots (ski & hiking), tent, clubs, canoe, and other options. Has garage space for sleek, SWPF with great lines, classic good looks, and desire to see where the road goes from here. 2278

non Aookm q w o tm n GSPF, CREATIVE, BRIGHT, ATTRACTIVE, playful spirit, adventurous, ISO partner with similar characteristics, late 30s40s. Must like kids. 2426____________

HOPELESSLY ROMANTIC. SWF, 28, ISO SF, 25 -32 ; very outgoing, enjoys movies, dancing, dining, romantic evenings, w/ a great sense of humor. 2407

SWM, 26, 6’1*, 200 LBS., SEEKS attrac tive F or BiF, 18-45, for fun and games. Discretion & maturity ensured. 2264

b y Alison Bech.de! SYDNEY? YOU SP£HT SEVEN , vo,, 1 HUNDRED BUCKS ON1WAT ? _

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1110 Shelburne Rd., So. Burlington 651-8774

2 4 4 3

objective, physically fit and craving adventure/travel to uncharted destinations. Romance/LTR. 2286___________

STIMULATE MY BRAIN. MAKE ME LAUGH. A massage would be nice, too. SWM, 31 , witty, athletic, articulate,

Ribs • Rotlsserie Chicken & More! 4 p.m. — 10 p.m.

from The Outdoor Gear Exchange are looking for out doorsy, fun, quirky dates for the company X-Mas party, 12/20. No committments, just fun, food, and margaritas. Stop by the store and ask for Roger, Chief or Nupp.

ing for SWF to share meaningful times. Must be honest and like to travel. Let’s cash in on life together. 2285________

WHO’S OUT THERE?! Attractive, fit SWPM, 24 , seeks attractive, fit, intelli

NOTHING TO HIDE. DWM, 38, 6’, 175

Personal of the Week wins dinner for two at

SINCERE, HONEST, ROMANTIC SWM, 42 , 5’ 9” , brown hair, blue eyes, look

HI, I’M AN UPBEAT SINGLE FATHER W/

loves his kids, slow dances, the Bruins, bad movies, pint of Guinness and a smoke, the Stones, spooning and laughing. How about you? 2347

$1.99 a minute, must be 18 or older.

WELL,I GcnrAT 2o*4 OFTATBUNNS ANDNCOPIE. BUTiF >bo Don't want it, I’LLTAKFITBACK.

D A D / I CANT BE LIEVE YOU/ haven’t I EXPLAINED A fHoUSANP tim es

how6UYNS AND

Noodle is RAPING THE CULTURAL

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• #

GWM, 5’8", 180 LBS., 40S. BUDDING

rm m m A sskin q w om an, TEACH THIS FUNNY, CHUBBY, UVM 18 YO smoker how to treat you right. While instructing me on the fine points of love, we can take field trips and explore our other passions. 2411______ GWF, 30, FAMILY IN THE RUTLAND area, visit often. Would like to make friends to hang out with. Interests: movies, shopping, darts, and more. 2369_____ bea u tifu l , lo v in g , v ib r a n t w o m an ,

25, seeks girls like me to dance, touch, play, laugh, be friends and explore our passion and glory. 2373

Asskinq m m

gym rat, not into club scene, looking for secure men. Me: professional into all art forms, travel, outdoors and your imagination. ISO a physical guy who wants to share adventures as well as cuddle in front of TV. Bodybuilders a big +. 2442_______________________ GWM, 26, ATHLETIC, ISO A PROF, ath letic, experienced, versatile WM, 26-40. Must be yourself. Humorous is a +. No skinny or fat men, please. LTR only. Burl, area. 2389___________________

NEW TO PERSONALS, 30s, s ’io". 150 lbs., kind-hearted romantic. Shy, but ready to be set loose. Masculine, musi cian, loves outdoors, dance music. Eager to make new friends. 2330_____

GWM, 20, ISO ANOTHER GUY WHO wears the same outfit more than two days in a row, can humor me with chicken anecdotes, and maybe, just maybe, will be himself. 2308_________

BLUE EYES, GWM, 3 9 . HANDSOME, who can be totally feminine from head to toe. For good times at my quiet place in the country. 2416

young-looking, seeking G/BiWM for dis creet fun evenings. Inexperienced wel come, tong hair a +, 18-48, no fats or ________________ ferns. 2312

AMATEUR m ale s t r ip p e r , b lo n d e ,

GWM, 30S, 6’, 170 LBS., ATTRACTIVE,

BIWM, 65. PASSIVE, ISO Bl/GBM, ND,

an and fit. Professional style show. :ree. Tuxedo, cowboy, logger and more. SO parties or private auditions. Hot un for you and your friends. 2433

to respond to a personal ad call l- 0 0 0 - 3 7 0 "71 2 7 • We’re Open 24 hours 3 day! $1.99 a minute, must be 18 or older.

# # * # • # # • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

in shape, ISO intelligent, attractive, in shape guys, 25 -35 , for friendships and LTRs. Like to workout, hike, bike, trav el, socialize. Burlington/Lake Champlain region. 2316

I WANT YOUI! GWM seeks international

SEEKING OLDER WOMAN. MaWM, 40s,

Ms in uniform. I’m a professional. Especially interested in B/A/H. Must be discreet. Deserve to have a sensational time. 2314 WORKING-CLASS MEN: GWM, 39. *95 lbs., 5’ 8” , br./bl. seeking G/BiWM mili tary, law enforcement, construction, trucker, business man, UPS or other uniformed profession for discreet dates, 18-45. 2313__________ ______

seeks silver-haired fox for weekly tryst. Age 58-68. If you’re curious, don’t delay. 2430_______________________

LOOKING FOR MATH BUDDY TO WORK on calculus problems. 2392_________ ATTRACTIVE CU IN MID-40S, BOTH Bi,

GWM. 24, MASCULINE, LOVES HUNTING

WIFE WANTED...PREFERABLY SOMEONE

and outdoor activities, as welt as inti macy, seeks straight-acting, masculine, fit man, 20-35 , with similar interests. Hoping for a great friendship, possible LTR, 2238 ______________________

GM, 38. s T . 160 LBS., MUSCULAR, hazel, PA, military cut, br./gr., glasses, attractive, open mind, heavy libido. ISO relationship-oriented man, who is at least 50% top, self-supporting and not afraid to take charge. OK if not out, but you should be comfortable. 2244

looking for Bi CUs, M & F, for friend ship 8t play. Bi self-awareness, intelli gence, honesty & good fun energy most important. 2402 elses. MaWM seeks MaWF who, tike me, is way unappreciated. I know you’re out there, so call. You know they’ ll never miss us as long as the TV’s still on. 2367_________________

MaCU, 35 81 28, BEGINNERS, ISO CU or BiF for erotic times. Healthy, discreet, attractive. 2375____________________

SUBMISSIVE BIWM, 30S, WITH GREAT legs and attractive, seeks discipline by GWM, TV, F, or CU. Discretion assured. Other role-play welcome. 2385_______

SWM, STRAIGHT, BUT A LITTLE differ ent, late 30s, great looker, seeking fun w/ women 81 lingerie. I’ll try on for fun MaWM, 40S. DESIRES PETITE F, 25-45, who needs more out of life. Long talks, long walks, creative food and play with discretion. Real adults only. Middlebury area. 2413

& want to party with you and your friends. 2387______________________

ACTIVE CU, 47-52, SEEKS F OR OTHER CU for sensual encounters. This safe, discreet, Montpelier area CU looks for ward to your response. 2346

W'M t • ■♦ • • * j respond to Letters Only ads:

leal your response in an envelope, Vite box # on the outside and place another envelope with $5 for each response. Address to: PERSON TO PERSON c/o SEVEN DAYS, P.0. Box 1164 , Bjrlington, VT 05402

TO GET TO KNOW THE LIBRA IN ? SWF, 21 , ISO man to be myself th. I’m honest, attractive & fun. Write f /ou can make me laugh! Box 410

53, A LIVE WIRE. Christian loves life, nature, wildlife. Enjoys travel, sunlight, dancing, music, moon light, cooking, candlelight, inner peace, twilight. Seeking you: strong, gentle, loving, ■ thful, honest. Box 411 1, PRETTy, SMART, MELLOW, mystical, imsical, wise, non-dogmatic spiritual s, seeks a mutual, gentle, deeply ur & swallow from eloquent fountain M l of heart. Box 412_______ _

fjETTY WIDOW ISO GRAY-HAIRED gen i a n , 55-65, who is kind, open and

handsome counterpart, 28 -42 . letic, fit, articulate, passionate, seeks same with sense of humor, love May, need for adventure. If you’re a Knight in modern armor, I’m your fair maiden. Picture helps. Box 401 seeks

*V '*> /

VT PUB & BREWERY. 12/5. TO THE lady going to England with Jim 81 Linda for the holidays, think you’re smart and classy. Me: the guy who provided the KSU overtime loss update. 2428______

RUTH, WE MET LAST CHRISTMAS, danced at the singles’ party. I’d like to see you again, but don’t know your last name or how to reach you. 2440

12/6, UNIV. MALL YOU SAID, “Hi." I was too stunned, that I saw you again, to say anything. Last week in Nov., you were watching over a little girl at the pool. You said to me that you were both going to get donuts after. I’d love to see that smile a third time. 2441

HANNAFORDS, SHELBURNE RD.. SUN. 11/ 29, a-m- We looked at each other. I’m interested. Let’s talk. I’m 5’ 9” , slen der, wore blue coat, drinking coffee. In my 40s. Call. 2390_________________

CHRIS S.. NICE TO SEE YOU DRIVE BY. Say “ hi” again, sometime. K.C. 2408 FIRST TIME: COLORADO. SECOND TIME: Borders, late afternoon, Fri., 11/ 27 . You said hello, twice. How about a third? You: F with F friend, buying cookbooks. Me: M, alone, then and now. 2398

*4 *" m m m 9

• • • •••* ■ • • • • • WHERE ARE YOU? Intelligent, attractive SWF, young-30S, seeks similar man w/ sense of humor about life. Join me run ning, hiking, skiing, laughing, dining, traveling and/or dancing! Don’t be shy! Box 392__________________________ GREAT CAKE NEEDS ICING. SWPF, 36, bright, warm, attractive, educated, loves the outdoors, has house and crit ters, seeks playmate/soulmate/boy-toy to share food, talk, wine, romps... house, critters? Write. Box 396_______

INDEPENDENT DF, 65, WOULD LIKE TO meet sophisticated friend/companion, 65+, to share ideas and participate in the cultural life of Burlington. Box 399

I’M LOOKING FOR A NEW BEST FRIEND. Criteria: SWPM, 35 -40, lover of moun tains, snowshoes, labrador retrievers, family, coffee & good books. Must have a warm, generous heart. Box 385_____

ATTRACTIVE WARM, PETITE, NS/ND, red-haired DWPF who enjoys travel, classical music, theater, exercise, learn ing experiences. ISO S/DWPM, fit, NS, ND, 50-65 , similar interests for honest communication, possible LTR. Box 388

WASPY? IMBUED WITH THE WORLD, words, wonder, warmth 81 wherewithal!? Here, fine features, too numerous. Electricity or not, you won’t be disap pointed. Please don’t ever tell how we met. Box 409_____________________

LIFE’S TOO SHORT FOR ORDINARY things. Articulate, active, educated man on cusp of 40s searching for adventur ous woman who is doing/has done things out of the ordinary with her life to compare notes and plot possible course together. Box 403____________

43, ATTRACTIVE, TALL NS, PENT-UP affection for shy, intuitive, mysterious witch. We will be close, caring, private, enduring. Purring like cats. Singing like birds. Candle quiet. Where are you? Box 400__________________________

SWM, 44, FAST-PACED, OVER ACHIEV ER, 150 lbs., 5’ 8” , very fit, business owner, light smoker, loves cooking, dancing, shopping 81 my dog. ISO F, fit 81 friendly. Ready-made family nice. Box

LONELY WOMEN. SWM, 48, caring. Weekend companion. Will treat you like a queen. Willing to cook, pamper & spoil you. Any age, weight, race. Bubble bath and champagne. Long term. Box 408

SHELL: WALLY CLEAVER MEETS JOHN Travolta. Stuffing: Kurt (Vonnegut), Carson (Rachel), Kramer (Cosmo). Genuine, nutty, very fit, conversant, deceptively clean-cut quasi-vegan, 26, loves writing silly songs, hiking, biking, reading and cooking; seeks smart, witty, confident, fit Burl, girl, 21 -28 , for friendship first. Box 381

HEART-CENTERED, ATTRACTIVE, inde pendent, active, aware, growth-oriented PF, 48, NS/NS/ND, seeks kindred PF spirit for friendship, poss. LTR. Love nature, the arts, kids, play, creativity, spirituality. Burt./Add. Co. Box 406

GWF, MATURE, LOVES TO DANCE, romantic walks in the moonlight, can dlelight dinners. Looking for GF, NS, age & looks unimportant. Clean/neat a must. LTR w/ right person. Take a chance. Box 393

MIDDLE-AGED, CLEAN BIWM WOULD like to meet WM, 18-24 , for very plea surable sexual experiences discreetly. Pref. thin & clean. Box 398__________

EARTH LOVER ISO UFE/TRAVEL PAL Kayak, swim, surf, hike, camp New Zealand, India, Ctrl. Amer.? You pick. 49, 6’, 160 lbs., gardener, homesteader, ecobuilder (scrounged materials), offgrid Luddite, sports playing, massage, political activist, attractive, healthy top, creative, considerate. Box 391________

GWM SEEKS TO MEET OTHER GM FOR friendship 81 possibly more. I am 37 , blue eyes, brow hair, very healthy, in great shape. I enjoy cooking, dining out, going for long rides in the country. If you’re out there, please drop me a line. Box 389______________________

GWM, 5’u " , 195 LBS., LOOKING FOR relationship. Can travel. Any race or color. Box 384

m ________________________ SUNLIGHT FILLS A CABIN BY A moun tain stream. Bearded craftsman, 35 , NS, NA, ND, NTV, flexible schedule. Seek F to ski hard, play fair and have fun. Box 395 ___________________

who, like me, reads broadly, enjoys rning, loves life’s finer things and B a great sense of humor. Box 405

Si F, 32, BLOND, BRIGHT, BEAUTIFUL,

'• • •

RETIRED DPM ISO GRAY-HAIRED LADY, 55 -65, who’s warm, open, sharing 81 fit, who, like me, reads broadly, enjoys continuing to learn, loves classical music, has sense of the ridiculous 81 enjoys country/city 81 travel. Box 380

DIEHARD PASSIONATE WM, very dis creet & absolutely healthy, ISO women who live to play. Love furry bugs, tight butts 81 large jugs. Platts, area. “ Give it up j p to iu a a neighbor.” n e i g n u u i . dBox u a 4 404 U4

■ ■ DIRTY BOY. GWM, 36, SEEKS TRAINING, discipline & more. Box 402__________ 48, 5’io", 150 LBS., LOOKING FOR M companion 81 friend. Enjoy cooking, quiet times, massage, rides 81 walks in the country. Rutland area. Box 397

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WE’VE KINDA MET ON THE HIGHWAY A couple of times in Wiltiston. Interested? I am WM, 36 . Please write. Box 407

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page 59

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