FREE R ID E S ! Take the train, beat the traffic, and hop a bus once downtown - it will be waiting to pick you up and deliver you to your destination!
= ■
MAIN STREET
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Northbound from Charlotte to Burlington
located within O ne M ain Street building.
(Daily Monday - Friday)
DEPARTS CHARLOTTE
DEPARTS SHELBURNE
ARRIVES BURLINGTON
7:00 a.m.
7:10 a.m.
7:25 a.m.
8:00 a.m.
8:10 a.m.
8:25 a.m.
5:10 p.m.
5:25 p.m.
5:35 p.m.
map not to scale
SH ELBU RN E Take Harbor Road from Route 7 , turn left just before railroad tracks. Station is behind firehouse.
Southbound from Burlington to Charlotte (Daily Monday - Friday)
^
DEPARTS BURLINGTON
DEPARTS SHELBURNE
ARRIVES CHARLOTTE
6:30 a.m.
6:45 a.m.
6:55 a.m.
7:30 a.m.
7:45 a.m.
7:55 a.m.
4:40 p.m.
4:55 p.m.
5:05 p.m.
5:40 p.m.
5:55 p.m.
6:05 p.m.
VERMONT TRANSPORTATION AUTHORITY
CHARLOTTE y
Take Ferry Road from Route 7 and turn right just beyond the railroad tracks.
951-4010
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For fresh ideas, visit the Onion River Co-op. 4 community market featuring natural foods, local produce, supplements, and gourmet specialties.
SEVEN DAYS
December 2 7 ,2 6 6 6 & January
the weekly read on Vermont news, views and culture
CO-PUBLISHERS/EDITORS PamUh Polston, Paula Routly CONTRIBUTING EDITOR Peter Freyne ASSISTANT EDITOR George Thabault GENERAL MANAGER Rick Woods ART DIRECTION Donald Eggert, Tara Vaughan-Hughes PRODUCTION MANAGER Lucy Howe CIRCULATION/CLASSIFIEDS/ PERSONALS Hope Corbin SALES MANAGER David Booth ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Michelle Brown, Kristi Batchelder, Eve Jarosinski, Colby Roberts, Diane Sullivan CALENDAR WRITER Alice Christian CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Marc Awodey, Nancy Stearns Bercaw, Flip Brown, Marialisa Calta, Colin Clary, Kristin D’Agostino, John Dillon, Erik Esckilsen, Peter Freyne, Anne Galloway, Paul Gibson, Ruth Horowitz, Helen Husher, Jeanne Keller, Kevin J. Kelley, Rick Kisonak, Peter Kurth, Lola, Lynda Majarian, Richard Mayer, Melanie Menagh, Andrew Nemethy, Jernigan Pontiac, Robert Resnik, Molly Stevens, George Thabault, Shay Totten, Pip Vaughan-Hughes, David Weinstoclc PHOTOGRAPHERS Berne Broudy, Andy Duback, Mark Sasahara, Jordan Silverman, Matthew Thorsen ILLUSTRATORS Paul Antonson, Harry Bliss, Gar)' Causer, Paula Myrick, Tim Newcomb, Steve Verriest, Scott Lenhardt, Sarah Grillo NEW MEDIA MANAGER Donald Eggert DIRECTOR, SEVEN DAYS DESIGN Tara Vaughan-Hughes NET PET • Dimitria SEVEN DAYS is published by Da Capo Publishing, Inc. every Wednesday. It is distributed free o f charge in greater Burlington, Middlebury, Montpelier, Stowe, the Mad River Valley, Rutland, St. Albans and Plattsburgh. Circulation: 25,000. Six-month First Class sub scriptions are available for $40. Oneyear First Class su b scriptions are available for $80. Six-month Third Class subscriptions are available for $20. One-year Third Class subscrip tions are available for $40. Please call 802.864.5684 with your VISA or Mastercard, or mail your check or money order to “Subscriptions” at the address below. For Classifteds/Personals or display advertising please call the number below. SEVEN DAYS shall not be held liable to any advertiser for any loss that results from the incorrect publi cation of its advertisement. If a mistake is ours, and the advertising purpose has been rendered valueless, SEVEN DAYS may cancel the charges for the advertise ment, or a portion thereof as deemed reasonable by the publisher. SEVEN DAYS is printed at B.D. Press in Georgia, VT.
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OF
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A L T E R N A T IV E N E W S W E E K U E S
k f j V E R IF IE D
B k
AUDIT CIRCULATION
COVER ILLU STRA TIO N : TIM NEW COM B COVER D ESIG N : DONALD R. EG G ER T
SEVEN DAYS. H ope s p rin g s e te rn a l.
j
:ffec8mtj@r 27. 2000 - January
Features Back Track: 2 0 0 0 in Review
.
page 4
weekly mail
page 4
inside track
page 5
news q u ir k s ...............
page 6
back talk .....................
page 7
By Gretchen G ile s .................................................................. page 16
paper t r a i l ..................
page 41
Rhythm & News: 2 0 0 in Review
c la s s ifie d s ..................
page 44
By Pamela Polston ......................................... ..................... page 20
car t a l k .......................
page 48
straight d o p e .............
page 48
story m in u te ...............
page 49
red m e a t .....................
page 50
life in hell ..................
page 50
free will astrology . . .
page 52
crossword puzzle . . . .
page 52
lola, the love counselor
page 53
personals.....................
page 53
dykes to watch out for
page 54
question
By Peter Freyne .......................................................................page 5
Down for the Count: 2 0 0 0 in Review By Peter Kurth .......................................................................... page 7
OK, Apocalypse, Now A look b a c k in w onder a t m ille n n ia l m a d n e ss
2001 First Night By Paula Routly ..................................................................... page 28
Live Man Talking: Male-Order Business By Chris M cDonald ................................................................page 3 5
Venice, Vermont?
Listings clubs
..........................
page 18
By Marc A w o d e y........................................................................... page37
calendar .....................
page 26
Mr. Tea
classes .......................
page 33
S till s ip p in g E n g lish B re a k fa st? A d ie -h a rd B rit s a m p le s
art
...............................
page 36
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page 38
A rt review : J ill M adden
th e n e w b rew s By Tim Brookes.............................................................................. page42
film
question
2001 isn’t the s c i-fi paradise that was promised. What futuristic predictions do you wish had come true? The prediction that i would win a million dollars.
— Elizabeth Deslauriers Manager, The Exchange Essex Junction
T H O U G H T FO R T H E DAY T he m orning after a majority o f the United States Supreme C ourt, in essence, decided for us who would be the(ir) next President, this thought came to mind: T hought for the day — for the next four years: I t looks like we are stuck w ith another Bush im itating a President again. — M organ W. Brown M ontpelier BU SH YEARS W ILL R E Q U IR E C O U R A G E George W. Bush will never be the duly elected President o f the United States. He will be inaugu rated at the hands o f C hief of Injustice A ntonin Scalia, whose son is employed by Bush’s legal team, but this is a stolen election. The last shreds o f democracy in
the USA have been discarded. T he five Supreme C ourt “jus tices” who voted to nullify the judgm ent o f the Florida Supreme C ourt have used the C onsti tution as toilet paper. T he votes o f citizens have been discarded because o f the possibility that they would not support the installation o f Bush into the pres idency. We have experienced a coup d ’etat. My personal disgust and fear are deeper than I can put into words. Bush’s grandfather was a Nazi sympathizer who gave money to Hitler. Bush’s father was head of the CIA and waged covert illegal wars. George W. Bush him self is inarticulate, o f average or below intelligence, and has dem onstrat ed that he does not respect hum an life or the rights of indi viduals.
As our rights continue to be eroded, and as the fascist move m ent continues to build steam and to dictate public policy, I hope we have the courage to not allow it. I hope I have the courage to stand for truth and justice and integrity, things which cannot exist in this puppet government. I fervently hope that this is a loud wake-up call, part of a para digm shift away from materialism and towards an age of love and growth, but I have my doubts. I hope that people realize that we do not live in a democracy. I hope Americans are waking up to the fact that they have been mol lified by access to things, but that the class divisions in this country are what dictates public policy. I hope people realize that anyone can be targeted by the fascists.
You don’t have to be black, or gay, or a Jew or poor, although those are the people the fascists pick on first. T hink, people. How can a government have legitimacy when it claims to be dem ocrati cally elected and clearly is not? How can any o f us, in good con science, cooperate with such a government? — W alter Zeichner Bolton Letters P olicy: SEVEN DAYS wants your rants and raves, in 250 words or less. Letters are only accepted that respond to content in SEVEN DAYS. Include your full name and a daytime phone number and send to: SEVEN DAYS, P.0. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402-1164. fax: 865-1015 e-mail: sevenday@together.net
I wish we had flying cars — that would be pretty nice. Or computers in our heads.
— Brian Curtis Manager, MacSphere South Burlington I guess I’m still expect ing a chicken in every pot... it would have been nice if they’d closed the financial gap.
A t h e n a ’^
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page 4
SEVEN DAYS ’
december 27, 2 0 0 0 & january 3, 2001 '
By P eter F r eyn e C a r t o o n s b y T im N
ew c o m b
veryone’s heard about “Moonlight in Vermont,” right? Well, be forewarned, the following annual review is a tale that could aptly be labeled “Sex in Vermont.” T hat’s because in 2000, Vermont’s public stage was dominated by not one, but two major stories that focused on the most private parts of our mam mal anatomy. Like blasts from a double-bar reled shotgun, both stories hit the proverbial news fan exactly one year ago this month. O n December 10, 1999, Y2K quickly took a back seat to the news of the UVM “Elephant Walk” ice hockey initiation ritual. And 10 days later, on December 20, 1999, the Vermont Supreme Court delivered its long-anticipated Christmas present to the cause of freedom — a unanimous decision approving equal marriage rights and bene fits for same-sex couples. One story involved the wee-wees of UVM s manly ice hockey culture. The other covered the massive fallout from the Supremes’ historic gay-marriage decision as it slid across the slippery Green Mountain political landscape like a live grenade. Unlike year-end reviews elsewhere, this one is constrained by the boundaries of Inside Track’s world. Often Seven Days broke the stories that steered the state’s political debate. And in some cases, we broke news that was simply too hot for other media to handle. Hey, that’s what we’re here for. “Holy hockeycock, Batman! W hat the hell was going on in Vermont in 2000?” asked Robin. “Good question, Robin,” answered Batman. “What do you say we hop in the Batmobile and check it out?” Okay, folks, ready for one more ride through 2000 A.D.? Fasten that seat belt, ’cause this is going to get a little bumpy.
E
January As the year began, all bets were off regarding what the 2000 legislative session would be about. The Supremes ruled that gays and lesbians have a right under the Vermont Constitution to pair off with the objects o f their desire just like straight citi zens do. Chief Justice Jeff AmeStoy, a Republican, simply called it “a recognition of our common humanity.” Gov. Howard Dean had admit ted within one hour of the deci sion that gay marriage made him “uncomfortable just like anybody else.” Quickly a right-wing, scrip ture-quoting frenzy broke out based upon the principle that if it walked like a duck and talked like a duck, it must b e... a homosexu al? “It is plain to any serious Bible student that Vermont has now become the world focus o f demonic activity. The Green M ountains has now labored and brought forth [the] AntiChrist, wrapped him in swad dling clothes and laid him in a Supreme Court pig sty. It is a verita
ble Luciferian Nativity Scene and Vermont is H ell’s Bethlehem.” No, this isn’t about U VM ’s Hockey Hazing scandal — well get to that later. This is about the current debate under the golden dome on gay marriage. The view expressed above is that o f the Kookie Kansas Kristians from Topeka. It’s posted on their fam ily-ori ented Web site: www.godhatesfags.com. Praise the Lord and pass the ignorance. Closer to home, the Roman Catholic bishop of Vermont, Kenneth Angell, aka the Bingo Bishop, made it clear to the members of Vermont’s largest religious denomina tion, “We are knee-deep in a moral crisis.” Over in UVM Icecapade Land, President Judith Ram aley dropped a bomb on January 15 — the remain der of the men’s hockey season was canceled because players had lied to university investigators probing hazing allegations. Yours truly called for heads to roll, from Ramaley to Coach M ike Gilligan. The national press was all over the story. Sports Illustrated called it “Vileness in Vermont.” It was not a happy time to be in Burlap.
February More sex. The Burlington Police Department negotiated a severance package with the veteran ser geant who had been in charge of the BPD comput er system. Sgt. Pat Voorheis had been developing personal liaisons on work time through a local “alternative lifestyles” Web site. Hey, what some dames won’t do for a man in uniform! Also in Burlap, Seven Days discovered that two candidates running for Burlap’s city council had managed to get in trouble with the law. One, Eric Brenner, had a domestic assault conviction. The other, Bradi Baker, had one pending. The Burlington Free Press, in what in hindsight may have been an omen about coming news censorship, did not report either candidate’s criminal record. Executive Editor M ick e y Hirten said it would be “unfair.” To whom? Both lost their respective races anyway. Down Montpeculiar way, the Bingo Bishop led a big pack of priests in a protest against gay mar riage outside the Statehouse. Yours truly couldn’t take it any longer; the former Catholic seminarian in me spoke loud and clear in a piece titled “Men in Black.” The Catholic Church today is a fru it withering on the vine. I t’s aging clergy shrinking daily. Yours truly
N e w T e a r ’s E v e Red S quare •
B A R
A N D
G R IL L
Back Track continued on page 8
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Can’t Think Any Faster Than They Run Thirty-three runners in Septembers Berlin Marathon decided to take a shortcut in the 26-mile race and hopped on the subway. They forgot that they were wearing computer chips designed to record their times every 5 kilometers, however, and all were disqualified.
lage of Ruzsa. Usually fire fighters who set fires do so because they seek recognition for putting them out, but in this case, according to the national news agency MTI, the fire fighter told police he acted because he felt an irresistible urge to set dry leaves on fire.
Swords to Plowshares Once the pride of the Soviet Unions Pacific Fleet, the aircraft carrier M insk has been sold to China, docked in Shenzhen and converted into an amusement park. The Associated Press report ed the decks of the 20-year-old, 43,000-ton vessel are crammed with carnival attractions and sou venir booths. The torpedo com partment has been turned into an air-conditioned cinema, and the aircraft hangar features Russian female performers posing like James Bond girls while tourists ride in virtual spacecraft. There’s even a shopping complex. The Minsk's only working weapons are coin-operated machine guns loaded with BB pellets, which visitors can fire at balloons. Ad mission costs $12.
Variation on a Theme Hungarian police arrested a 23-year-old volunteer fire fighter who admitted committing arson at least nine times, causing nearly $600,000 in damage to pine woods and houses around the vil-
Fulfilling His Destiny Police investigating a report of noises coming from a pasta shop in Bologna, Italy, that was closed for lunch found Stefano Spaghetti, 38, helping himself to tortellini. USA Today reported that after his arrest, Spaghetti admitted to the officers, “I don’t even like tortellini.”
Justice Served Kairbek Suleymenov, interior minister of the ex-Soviet Republic of Kazakhstan, decided to travel incognito by truck across the Kazakh steppes to find out the level of corruption motorists have to deal with. The driver, who was transporting nine tons of melons, had to pay bribes to 36 different customs and police officials, bringing the eventual cost of $225 to the driver. When the truck arrived at its destination, Suleymenov, who filmed the bribe-taking on a video camera, fired all the officials who took bribes.
Zip Your Lip
When Anthony Annarino, 55, the former city tax collec tor of Providence, Rhode BY ROLAND SWEET Island, who was convicted of Butt Heads corruption, joked after his sen Francis Pardo was charged tencing that he planned to spend with kidnapping and murdering his 2-1/2 years behind bars Glen Porter, 35, whose nude and improving his golf game, federal dismembered body was found in authorities changed his assign a recycling bin, after authorities in ment from a minimum-security Montgomery County, Pennsyl prison to a medium-security one. vania, discovered a Budweiser Noting Annarino’s comment “was bottle cap embedded in Porter’s a slap at the system that the buttocks. They said it matched Bureau of Prisons did not take the brew date and brewery loca lightly,” U.S. Marshal John tion of bottles found in Pardo’s Leyden said golf is not allowed at home. Ray Brook prison near Lake • After police arrested a man for Placid, New York, where Anna marijuana possession outside a rino’s fellow inmates include John bus station in Amarillo, Texas, A. “Junior” Gotti, son of the New they found $1887 in the man’s York crime boss. front pocket and $4090 in his socks. A further search turned up Use All You Want, We’ll $8050 in cash and six postal Make More money orders totaling $4200 hid A shortage of human sperm in den between the man’s buttocks. Canada is sending doctors and their patients to U.S. sperm banks Foxes in the Hen House in record numbers. “The stocks London’s Metropolitan Police have decreased dramatically,” said announced that former petty fertility specialist Roger Pierson, criminals are welcome to join the president of the Canadian force. “This wouldn’t apply to Fertility and Adrology Society, people who had shown criminal citing new, stricter regulations intent, like burglary, but it means that he said have caused U.S. if someone had committed a orders from Canada to increase a minor offense, they would not be hundred-fold this year alone. automatically sifted out, as they W hat’s more, Canadians must pay were before,” a police spokesper four or five times more for U.S. son said. “If you hit the target on semen, which often comes from 19 out of 20 criteria and miss it for-profit clinics, than they would on one, we would consider your for domestic semen. application.”
Sponsoring Gridlock A coalition of business groups looking for solutions to traffic congestion in northern Virginia proposed letting corporations pay for the right to put their name on roads and subway stations, the way they do sports arenas. The money could then be used to improve existing roads and build new ones.
Changing Landscape The Norwegian Mapping Authority disclosed that Norway has 16,000 more miles of coast line than previously thought. Engineer Tore Tonning explained that a new computer program was able to measure thousands of tiny inlets and islands more precisely than the last survey 30 years ago. He said the mainland is actually about 2480 miles longer than pre viously believed, and the distance around islands is roughly 13,670 miles greater. • The German government’s property administration office said a giant swastika formed by trees would be chopped down. The 200-by-200-foot russet-col ored swastika of larches, which a devoted follower of Adolf Hitler planted near Zernikow in 1937, stands out every autumn amid the green pines. Government spokesperson Reinhardt Bauerschmidt said a 1995 attempt to remove the swastika, which is visible only from the air, by pruning the trees had failed.
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T W ° DcMjS Oniif! hat do you say about a year that had everything in it but the truth? By coincidence, I finished w riting m y biography o f Isadora D uncan just in time for this colum n. Isadora, o f course, is a goddess. Like all goddesses, she’s tem peram ental and speaks in wild generaliza tions, a trait that needed no encouraging in me. “Art is greater than governm ents,” Isadora said. Also: “Any wom an who reads the m ar riage contract and then goes into it deserves all the conse^ quences.” A nd ^ my favorite, after she danced with Nijinsky at a party in Venice — “It was more fun than making love to a Negro 1 boxer on [a] bil liard table.” You’ll have to forgive Isadora’s use o f the word “N egro.” It was considered a respectful desig nation at the tim e — 1924. W hen I began to study her life I was fortunate to know George Seldes, w ho had met Isadora in Berlin that year and got her started on her autobiography. She began by saying some thing I believe to be true, and which I quote here not in the spirit o f cynicism, but the opposite. Please remember that a cynic is only a disillu sioned rom antic, after all. “I w ant this book to be som ething w orth leaving behind,” Isadora told Seldes. “It will be w orth doing only if it is a book which will help people to live. I w ant to tell the truth about my loves and my art because the whole world is absolutely brought up on lies. We are fed on nothing b u t lies. We begin w ith lies,
W
got is government by fiat, and what we’ve just seen in W ashington is a coup d ’etat. Herewith is the second big lie o f the year 2000: T hat George W. Bush is now President-elect. They’ve left out a letter — it’s Presidentselect. If some other poor hack of a writer has already come up with that phrase to describe Poppy’s second choice for the job (as everyone knows, Jeb is a lot smarter than Ding-Dong), do excuse me: You can’t live in a 24hour torture chamber o f elec tronic gibbering and not steal a few jokes. The media’s phony obsession with “plagiarism” sim ply has to stop. At the corpo rate level, I’m relieved to say, the year 2000 saw fewer journalists pretending to examine their motives with wor ried look and pouted lip, and more o f them engaged in the sheer exercise of power. It was touch-and-go when little Elian washed ashore, and that Diane Sawyer still has her job is only prqof o f Isadora’s philosophy. Anyone who’s ever et’s begin with the first lie, been fed into the maw of then, the one that said the year 2000 was the first o f the American “news-gathering” knows w hat lies are, and that new m illennium. This is the they stay on the record until first lie because it absorbs all the end o f time. You can’t get the other lies about “the rid o f them no matter what future” and “our children” and you do. They’re there forever. such. T he real millennium starts now, in 2001. This is I’m not talking about your Mike Barnicles and Patricia indisputable to anyone who can count, but the dust o f “the Smiths, who invented only characters and words, but future” has been kicked into higher up, in your broadcast American eyes for such a long ing boardrooms and suites, tim e that when you point it where they pick the stories out you’re taken for a killjoy and spin them, and where the “negative.” A nd we don’t want only goal is to keep them negative. W hat we w ant is spinning until the last dollar “consensus” and “healing.” W h at we w ant is “unity” and continued on page 13 “bipartisanship.” W hat we’ve
and half our lives, at least, we live w ith lies. M ost hum an beings today waste some twen ty-five to thirty years o f their lives before they break through the actual and con ventional lies which surround them .”
M o n d ay January 1st Tuesday January 2nd N oon-5:00
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Back Track: 2000 in Review continued from page 5 recalls the church when its pews were full, when it focused on socialjustice and peace. Sadness swept over me a t the memory o f priests like Fr. D aniel Berrigan S.J., whose non-violent protests against the Vietnam War landed him in many a ja il cell... How different were these men in black gathered outside the Statehouse last Thursday — a few o f whom we recognized from the racetrack at Saratoga and the OTB betting parlor in Plattsburgh. God’s law, my arse! But the greatest mockery o f all came from the lips o f the Bingo Bishop himself. Rev. Angell closed his remarks by shamelessly declar ing, “W ith M artin Luther K ing fr. we proclaim, we shall over come, we shall overcome, we shall overcome. ” Oh, Great and Sanctified Angell, give me a frickin break — you couldn’t carry M artin Luther Kings jockstrap! Praise the Lord and pass the tolerance!
The St. Albans Messenger that Ho-Ho had “bribed” lawmakers to vote for civil unions. Dean shot back, calling Dwyer an “extremist.” And away we went! Around the country, major newspapers weighed in editorial ly on Vermont’s new civil-unions law. Very favorable editorials appeared in the Arizona Daily
March Continuing with the “Year of Sex” theme, Seven Days broke the news that Gloria Steinem, the renowned feminist icon, had been banned from appearing at Trinity College in Burlington. Trinity is, or rather was, a Catholic college. Not the finest hour for an institution of higher learning. History will record that just before taking its final breath, Trinity College took a sharp turn to the right. Trinity grad and PR director M ary Sullivan resigned in protest. A couple months later, Trinity announced it was going under for good. And over at diocesan head quarters, the Bingo Bishop final ly showed a little mercy. No, the holy hand of mercy wasn’t extended to gay and lesbian Catholics, but rather to IrishAmerican Catholics. Homosex uals may not be allowed in Bishop Angell’s Heterosexual Paradise, but since St. Patricks Day fell on a Friday this year, the Bingo Bish issued a dispen sation allowing Vermont Catholics to wash down their pints of beer with genuine corned beef and cabbage. Angell lifted the Church ban on eating dead animal flesh on Fridays. Big softie! Meanwhile, on the Ides of March, the Vermont House passed the hotly debated civilunions bill, which extended to gay and lesbian couples all the rights and benefits of civil mar riage. The vote was 79-68. This legalization of love moved on to the State Senate.
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The first salvos in what would later become the big political war between Republican Ruth Dwyer and Democrat Gov. Howard Dean were fired. Ruthless Ruth told
body else.” Star, the Concord Monitor, The New York Times, the M iam i Herald and the Minneapolis StarTribune. Couldn’t find even one unfavorable. “Vermonters should be proud, ” wrote The New York Times, “that they are leading the way toward a society that values stable gay relationships... In time, Vermont’s example w ill show the rest o f the country that same-sex unions are not a threat to tradi tional marriage and deserve the name o f marriage as well as the law’s fu ll protection. ” Inspiring. Here at home, it was becom ing painfully obvious that Vermont’s largest daily newspa per, the Gannett-owned Burlington Free Press, had a problem with civil unions. On an editorial page that has no problem taking pointed stances on almost anything, the silence of the Freeps’ editorial voice on civil unions was positively deaf ening. By year’s end, that remarkable silence would con tinue. In an April radio appearance on the campaign trail, Truthless Ruth briefly lost all touch with honesty when a caller praised her as a “native Vermonter” who will stand up to the “flatlanders.” Ruth didn’t say a word about her roots to contradict the supportive caller. Fact is, Mrs. Dwyer, daugh ter of an insurance executive, was born Ruth Cook in the state of Ohio. From there she moved to Long Island. A flatlander is she! O n April 19, the Senate
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passed the civil-unions bill 19-11 and sent it to the Governor for his signature. Dean signed it, but he did so in private. No reporters. No cameras. Ho-Ho did his duty, but he was still looking a little uncomfortable.
May More favorable, pro-civilunions editorials trickled in from the Chicago Tribune and the Detroit Free Press. Even The Stowe Reporter and Barton Chronicle weighed in with their blessings. Meanwhile, the Free Press ran a big photo of some jackass’ vulgar protest sign: “OUR ANUS GOVERNOR TRADED COWS FOR QUEERS.” And believe it or not, the Freeps ran the same frickin’ photo again the following week at the top of the letters-to-theeditor page. But the big news in May came out of the lawsuit that ignited UVM’s Hockey Hazing Scandal. The suit had been filed by the now-infamous Corey LaTulippe ofWilliston. Corey had been a freshman trying out for a spot on his Team of Dreams. He didn’t make the cut. Subsequently, after his attorneys attempted to shake down UVM, to the tune of $350,000 to coop erate with the hazing investiga tion he prompted, LaTulippe filed suit. A poor, sweet and innocent victim of cruel hazing by upperclassmen was he. Or was he? In May, LaTulippe finally had to sit down under oath in a pretrial deposition. Guess what? He’d lied. He’d lied about his coach and his teammates and his willing participation in the Big Night initiation party. Under oath, Corey painted a much dif ferent picture of what had hap pened at UVM, and no longer could we consider him the victim he so desperately wanted to be. It was time to eat a little crow here, folks, and we did. In light o f Corey LaTulippes . admissions o f deceit and dishonesty, yours truly wishes to retract our earlier view that college officials should have been dismissed over the matter. They were not perfect, but they certainly made the effort. Like most people, we believed LaTulippe to be an honest victim. He was nei ther.
June With the Statehouse emptied out, the political campaigns start ed heating up. And make no mis take, sex topped the campaign agenda. “Take Back Vermont” signs quickly sprouted in the hills. Opponents of civil unions were making all the noise. They angrily promised to “Remember in November,” and right-wing religious fanatics were tripping over one another in the race to establish political action commit tees. Disgusting full-page ads continued popping up in news papers making outrageous, bigot ed and false claims. Yours truly profiled State Sen. Dick M azza of Colchester, a devout Roman Catholic. He runs the old family grocery store in Malletts Bay. He’s a “Howard Dean Democrat” and one of the fairest, most decent public ser vants you’ll ever meet. Week after week, Mazza sat quietly in his pew at Holy Cross Church as his pastor, Fr.
the rear o f the church and call their local representatives to express moral opposition to civil-union leg islation. Despite the priest’s ScarletLetter sermonizing, M azza was a little surprised by how few o f them obeyed the orders from the pulpit. A fter all, he told Seven Days, there are gays and lesbians among the Holy Cross congregation. A nd over the winter, he was reminded by many a customer/constituent that many, many Vermonters have a gay fam ily member, a son or daughter or cousin. They know first-hand a human face that debunked the sin fu l, burn-in-hell picture the Men in Black were marketing.
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It was the “gotcha” story of the year. State Sen. Jan BackUS, a Chittenden County Democrat, was delinquent on her Winooski property taxes. More than a year behind. Not good. Not good for . a legislator and certainly not good for a candidate for the United States Senate. Seven Days got to Jan of Arc just before the delinquent-tax collec tor. She promptly paid up. But you just got to wonder,
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Roger Charbonneau, railed against civil unions. ‘Some read the Bishop’s letter and dropped it, ”said the Grocer. “Fr. Charbonneau kept on going. ’’ A nd every weekend at Holy Mass, the Grocer sat quietly and listened as the priest warned the parish ioners o f the evil that the liberal Democrats running the Legislature were forcing down their good Catholic throats. Fr. Charbonneau, said Mazza, urged the congregation each week to sign the petitions in
i
eh? Moral of the story? Pay your taxes. Backus ended up losing in the September primary to Ed Flanagan.
O n the hazing front, Seven Days broke the news that the remaining defendants had reached an out-of-court settle ment with Corey LaTulippe. John Boylan represented one of the defendants. In addition to agreeing not to
continued on page 10
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reveal the amount o f the settle ment, Boylan said the five players also signed a “covenant”promising not to counter-sue LaTulippe. Asked i f the o u t-o fcourt settle ment was an admission o f wrong doing, Boylan replied, “Absolutely not. ”He said it was “simply a way to close this chapter. ” The settle ment, he said, “is really more o f a reflection on the part o f Corey LaTulippe that he should not have sued these kids in the first place. ” A ll o f the parties “have been hurt, ”said Boylan. “The only peo ple who have benefited are the lawyers. ” On the campaign trail, we noticed a surprising distance between Congressman Bernie Sanders, father of the Progressive movement, and Anthony Pollina, the Progressive Party’s first candidate for gover nor. Mr. Sanders, the Vermont Democrat, er, sorry, Independent, explained that he simply doesn’t “have tim e”fo r Tony the Prog and all the other Sanderistas who think o f him as their political hero, a living legend. “M y major function right now, ”said Sanders, “is represent ing the people in the Congress, and I spend a whole lot o f tim e in that and that’s where my energy is going right now. ”
involved in the brokerage business and politics. Today he’s a senior vice-president a t Salomon Smith Barney, working a t the firm ’s South Burlington office. Harlan’s also a Democrat, unusualfor a Wall Street type. He says he’s a “ fiscal conservative”and “moderate on social issues. ”Sounds like a Blue Dog Democrat to me. In the public arena, Harlan’s the chairman o f the Governor’s Council o f Economic Advisors and also chairman o f the state racing commission. B ut Harlan Sylvester is much, much more. You see, Mr. Sylvester has had the cocked ear o f Vermont gover nors all the way back to Tom Salmon in the 1970s. I t’s said that form er Republican Gov. D ick Snelling had Harlan’s phone number on his speed dial. And were told by reliable sources that Gov. Howard Dean, son o f a Wall Street mover and shaker himself, regularly stops by Harlans topfloor office with the lake view. Later, a couple of political insiders.complained that all we’d done was feed Harlan’s ego. Hey, can’t please everyone. Also in August we wrote about the sudden death of a friend, Katy McGiff, whom we first met in the 1980s at Burlington’s trail-blazing Vanguard Press. Died in her
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^5 tom* sleep, just like that, at 40 years Needless to say, The Bern of age. would not be attending Mr. One o f the things we shared Pollina’s official campaign kick-off was our love fo r the late, great in Barre. Way too busy. Chicago columnist M ike Royko. Now that Bernie’s made it to In fact, M ike’s mug is forever over prim e time, is he ditching all the my desk. Royko knew moments loyal little people who made him like this one when sadness hits like such a big star? Or maybe he ju st • a tidal wave. A nd he wrote about thinks he did it all by himself, it. and made it big by riding the Twenty-one years ago, in an power o f his own personality and unforgettable column that fo l ideas? lowed the sudden death o f his wife from a brain hemorrhage, M ike thanked readers fo r their tender expressions o f sorrow and love. This was the m onth we A nd he wrote this line, which I ’ve introduced readers to the always cherished, a reminder fo r “Godfather” of Vermont politics those left behind in sudden, tragic — Harlan Sylvester. Harlan moments like this one. Wiser likes to keep a low profile, but words you’ll never hear: he spoke to The Washington Post “I f there’s someone you love but for an article on Ed Flanagan. haven’t said so in a while, say it Harlan is not an Ed Flanagan now. Always, always say it now. ” fan. Cat’s out of the bag, was the Amen, Mike. way we figured it. Time to write IfK a ty’s in a spot where souls about Harlan! keep an eye on the ones they left Harlan is a 63-year-old St. behind, she w ill surely visit the Albans native who resides in Seven Days Web site and read this Burlington’s swank H ill Section. week’s installment aloud to the He graduated from U VM back in angels. A nd with that grin on her 1959 and, as a young man, got
August
C LEA N UP. S P E C IA L B E A U T Y B A R G A IN S . 197 C o lle g e S tre e t B u rlin g to n 8 0 2 .6 5 7 .DISH
page i d
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face, she’ll make some crack about how she had to bloody well drop, dead to get her name in “Inside Track. ” '
September Ruth Dwyer easily beat Bill M eub in the Republican pri mary. But the day after the vote, we hit the street with the block buster story of Bernie Rom e’s allegations of anti-Semitism aimed at Ruthless Ruth. Rome went public for the first time with what had been the hottest unreported story of the 1998 governor’s race. It was the story of a phone conversation between the two in September 1997, and the story exploded into the mainstream Vermont press.
The trio o f newspapermen rep resent three o f Vermont’s major news shops. Mr. G raffis the head o f the Associated Press Bureau in Montpelier, which feeds all the state’s daily newspapers, radios and television stations. Mr. Hoffman is the chiefat the Vermont Press Bureau, which represents the Rutland Herald and the Times Argus. Neither are Jewish. Mr. Lisberg was at the time a Statehouse reporter fo r The Burlington Free Press. He recent ly departed Vermontfo r a job a t a New Jersey paper. Lisberg is Jewish. Hey, one out o f three! In base ball that’s a .333 batting average — good enough fo r the all-star team. B ut this isn’t about the sport o f baseball. This is about the ugly sport o f Jew-bashing, antiSemitism and bigotry. It’s about reaching fo r the lowest common denominator. Dwyer said the phone con versation did occur, but she denied making comments about Jews. The story turned into a real barn-burner and made front pages around the state — every where but in The Burlington Free Press. “Not up to our high stan dards,” said Executive Editor Mickey Hirten. That in itself became quite the story.
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Well, most of the mainstream press, anyway. “I asked her how come the press was defending the legislature so well, ”he told Seven Days. “Ruth said the press wasn’t defend ing the legislature, [she said] they’re defending the governor. ” Rome inquired why? Mrs. Dwyer, he said, replied, “Because he’s Jewish and the press is Jewish. ” Ka-boom! Say what? Rome was stunned by Dwyer’s remark. N ot only was it blatantly anti-Semitic and offensive, he said, it also revealed Dwyer’s igno rance. You see, Bernie’s last name may be the same as that o f the Italian city on the Tiber River, but he’s no paisano. Bernie Rome, like Joseph Lieberman, is a Jew. “I asked her,”said Rome, “is the Governor Jewish?A nd she said, ‘Well, no, but his wife is and they’re raising their kids Jewish. ’” “A nd I said, who in the press is Jewish?” “A nd she said Chris G ra ffand Jack H offm an and Adam Lisberg. ”
The clutter of lawn signs was burying our beautiful fall land scape in political pollution. And stealing lawn signs was turning into a new nighttime sport in the Green Mountains. Folks were doing doubletakes over Ruth Dwyer’s super slick TV commercials. Ruth with kids. Ruth with horses. Ruth just wanting to “listen to lead.” She also charged Howard Dean with wanting to reduce the quality of our health care so we end up like Canada. Turns out Vermont’s TV sta tions are on the cable in Montreal. Dave Bronstetter, the morning man on CBC radio, had had enough. He called up Ruthless Ruth and they got into a bit of a tiff on the Canadian airwaves. According to both Bronstetter and Dwyer, the interview turned into an argument. The gloves came off. Ruthless defended the virtues o f free enterprise and let ting the insurance companies run things their way. Bronstetter defended his country and its health-care system. Dwyer, said Bronstetter, played the role o f the “ugly American” to a T. Her attitude, he told us, was that “we’re ju st some backwater that depends on America fo r our milk. ”As things got heated, he said, Mrs. Dwyer simply hung up on him. “Is this any way fo r a neighbor to act?”asked Bronstetter. “First she insults our health-care system. Then she said I was rude and hung up. ” In October, Inside Track published a one-of-a-kind letterto-the-editor that The Burlington Free Press had turned down. continued on page 4 0
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has been strangled out o f whatev er lie is being told. In the Amer ican media, everyone copies from everyone else, all the time, and an original thought is as rare as an honest one. This is now called irony. T he first person w ho writes in to say that I ’m the American
cameras, and I said so in this col um n, centuries ago, in July 1999: “H e’ll win, you know. How could he not? This is a country that, when asked by the Post Office to pick subjects for a series o f stamps to commemorate the 1990s, chose the cellular phone and Titanic.” Titanic even seems like a good movie from this distance (though Forrest Gump never will). I note with sorrow that Renee Zellweger and Jim Carrey
I can’t w ait to see if Dubya’s sobriety cracks under the strain of signing so many bills he hasn’t read. He HI oesn’t
need to — that’s
the point. He isn’t and won t be running the s media wins the Y2K “G et a Life” award. (Do they say “get a life” any more? W hat differ ence does it make?) In the wake o f the Republican putsch, I offer two maxims for the faint. The first is from William Jennings Bryan, populist candidate for President in 1896: “O ne o f the duties o f the government, one o f the im por tant duties o f gov ernm ent, is the putting o f rings in the noses o f hogs.” T he second is from Germ an socialist O skar Lafontaine, offered m uch more recently: “T he heart isn’t traded on the stock market yet, and it beats on the left.” Let’s hope he’s right, and that the geneticists don’t get to it first.
\
have already ended the love affair they began right here in N orth Sodom, on the set o f M e, M yself a n d Irene. Phooey: There goes Renee’s only hope o f becoming the next C atherine Zeta-Jones! A nd speaking o f Sodom — for once I can write about s to D um bo — where’s Verm ont and not be parochial. Endora w hen you need her? “Civil unions” are here to stay, So-called Dem ocrats are going toaccording to incom ing House have to take tim e out from their Speaker W alter Freed, R-Dorset, orange mochas and gingerbread which means that homosexuals lattes if they w ant to know w hat are, too, I guess, but only really happened in the only story because it w ouldn’t be “practical” that matters this year. It w on’t do to repeal them. It’ll be done the to blame Nader. I knew Republican way, by increment. Dagwood w ould win the m inute H ere’s Freed’s counterpart in his beady eyes first blinked at the W ashington, House Speaker
A
Dennis Hastert, talking about D urw ood’s proposed tax cut for the wealthy: “We’re most success ful, especially in tax policy, when we start to take tax ideas and do them a piece at a tim e.” Get it? W hat works for taxes goes double for pork. A nd on matters of social policy, a distrac tion is normally arranged — an emergency or a war. T hink Falkland Islands and coal miners’ strike. T hink Oliver N orth. D on’t bother with Clinton’s penis anymore, because while all that was going on — and on and on — so was a lot else that didn’t got noticed. In its modern form, this technique was sprung by Margaret Thatcher and perfected by Ronald Reagan, or whoever ran him. We know who’s run ning Dodo. If they ever let him speak again w ithout a script, I’m sure he’ll prove just as affable as everyone says — for a heartless killer and corporate plug. You see, I keep coming back to that — nothing else holds a candle to it. W hat’s happened is the assassination of the presi dency, and thus of executive authority, by the state itself. This is the prerequisite and the historical first step o f fascism. Com m on wisdom will ascribe lost confidence in the American Presidency to Bill C linton and Monica Lewinsky, but we know better, don’t we, children? Obviously not.
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K, you want a list? Here are some things that am ounted to nothing in the last year: The com puter meltdown, IPOs, the death of “Peanuts” (still run ning), AIDS (still killing), ade quate and affordable health care (still out of reach), e-books, Pokemon, the Microsoft trial, Rudolph Giuliani, John M cCain, the Oslo accords, water on Mars, Kenneth Starr — should I go on? And do you remember the dither we were once in about these? T hat’s how it’s done, my darlings. We’re amusing ourselves to death, as Neil Postman says. You can’t talk about Postman, though, because it’s been charged that he “groped” a female student at NYU some years ago. T hat is to say, he created an “unsafe space.” Thus a thinker is silenced. It happens all the time now. Quick: WTien did we bomb Yugoslavia, this year or last? Iraq? Sudan? W hat’s happened to those refugees? How many children shot each other in Y2K? I think there were some Olympics, but who can tell? Like everything else, they’re on all the time. Did you love Richard Hatch or hate him? D o you want to be a mil lionaire or not? Just answer the question, yes or no — you have no other choice. It’s like voting. O n health care, may I say that our own Fletcher Allen is
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december 27, 2 0 0 0 & january 3, 2001
SEVEN DAYS
page 13
Crank Call 2 0 0 0 in Review continued from page 13
W hinirt
the nearest example o f the medical future aw aiting the merely affluent, as opposed to the filthy rich. I was there twice this year, and the second
W hy don’t you just try a little m editation? Colom bia’s got a nice chunk o f your money now to spend on bribes. And, according to Newsweek, 14 mil lion men, overwhelmingly black and Hispanic, will be sent to jail for seeking “relief” that’s perfectly legal in other forms. I can’t wait to see if
Well, at least for one night.
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SEVEN DAYS
december 27, 200 0 & january 3, 2001
tim e they gave me a private room so I w ouldn’t spread sedition am ong the patients. All I can say is that the nurses were w onderful, but, like teachers, they’re on their way out. Over four days at the appropriately nam ed FA H C — say that out loud — five doc tors couldn’t tell me w hy I was anemic, som ething the hem a tologist understood the m inute she saw my chart two weeks later. “You’re com ing up a great big goose-egg, Mr. K urth,” the M D s said, not that I ever saw the same one twice. My aunt was incarcerated at Fletcher Allen recently and emerged saying it’s run by the M arx brothers. It’s the worst hospital she’s ever stayed in — this from a w om an w ho’s had breast cancer and given birth on G uam . In another “cost cutting” move, cheap beds have been installed that even the nurses adm it they w on’t take naps on, so lousy w ould they feel if they did. Naturally, I now owe FAHC m any thousands o f dol lars, even though I’m fully insured. A l-though I ’ve nearly died in the past from the con dition that brought me there the second tim e — bacterial pneum onia — the rescue squad wants $ 100 because I failed to call my usurers first for autho rization. I wasn’t even allowed to bring my own medications to that disgraceful hole, but had to order them singly from the FAHC pharmacy, at $30 a pop. T he war on drugs, m ean t i m e , is going really well: You can’t get a sedative here to save your life. T his is Vermont:
Dubya’s sobriety cracks under the strain o f signing so many bills he hasn’t read. He doesn’t need to — that’s the point. He isn’t and won’t be running the show. But cheer up — we’ll all be extinct in a thousand years. Such is the optim istic appraisal o f Prof. Stephen Hawking, w ho’s joined the rising clamor for rockets to send rich people into space. Tired as I am of “spirituality,” I still prefer it to science. “I am afraid the atmosphere m ight get hotter and hotter until it will be like Venus, w ith boiling sulfuric acid,” Hawking says, or squawks through his box. “I am worried about the green house effect.” Hawking adds that “the challenge for physics [is] to produce an explanation o f everything — a complete unified theory.” W on’t that be fun? T hen what? Uranus? “Hollywood pools are different from pools in the rest o f America,” says photographer Lauren Greenfield in The New York Times M agazine. "Everyone in L.A. has his own pool, and it’s very im portant to certain kinds o f people in L.A. that their pools reflect their personali ties.” M y thanks to Alex Beam o f The Boston Globe for draw ing my attention to this story, which I still haven’t read. I don’t need to — that’s the point. In closing, aren’t you glad Sinclair Lewis wrote I t C ant Happen Here — here, in Barnard, Vermont? Seldes w on dered why there wasn’t a plaque on the house. I’ll tell you why: because it can. ®
(
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SEVEN DAYS
page 15
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SEVEN DAYS
ity the poor apocalyptics. This time last year, we all took the Coming of the End pretty darn seriously, and the experts and freaks alike who glow ingly outlined it, even more seri ously. Just as the annual county fair lends a one-time cachet of cool to ordinary farm kids in 4-H kerchiefs, so did the predicted end o f society bestow slight celebrity upon code-fixers and death doodlers. Even the most off-hand among us chuckled with just a touch of unease at the specter of doom soon to slam down. W hat visions we entertained! It puts the simple lead-walled shelters of the Cold War to shame. W ith the failure of our com puter networks would surely come the cessation of modern life, a grim satisfaction at best. We cowered in our beds last Christmas, visions of sugar- ,■ plummed thugs roaming subur ban neighborhoods stealing Cephalon pans and wives’ depila tory cream dancing in our heads. We m ourned in advance our use less N intendo games, our fit-
P
december 27, 200 0 & january 3, 2001
only-for-a-planter microwave ovens, the white-noised phone lines and juiceless electrical plugs that would mock us in the frigid dawn o f Jan. 1, 2000. O ur buddy the computer, that machine most privy to our spread sheets, flaming e-mails and shameful Web visits, would lie blankly dorm ant. T he ther mostat would stubbornly stay flat. T he coffee w ouldn’t perk, the fridge would flood, and our whites, alas, would never again look brighter. Accordingly, most o f us bought at least one new battery and 8 ounces of Evian water in preparation for the worst. And earnest nonprofit — or is that for-prophet? — organi zations sprang up like uncanny mushrooms to begin preparing us for the end o f the world as we knew it. It was almost exciting, in a horrible kind of way. And no wonder. T he Global Situation Report’s (GSR) December 1998 essay, “Preparing For Y2K: A Step by Step Approach,” by editor Michael Lindemann, soberly warned that ordinary citizens were well advised to prepare for a three-
m onth siege of uncivilized life (read: no electricity) after the com ing of the light o f the New M illennium . T he GSR further advised each citizen to stockpile $4000 to $10,000 in cash and to stash away the equivalent o f three 55-gallon barrels o f water for each person in a four-person household. All that water demands a portable loo as com plement; all that cash, a nicely oiled firearm. Realizing the large needs of these recommendations, the GSR suggested clearing a 10-by-10foot area of your hom e for stor age, building stout shelving, and either taking a second job, selling off extra goods, or running up your credit card in order to raise the cash necessary to pay your bills and mortgage when society crashed all around you but house and garbage payments were still strangely due. As for food, forget the Victory Gardens o f yore — no one was expected to win. “D ried,” not “live,” was the word du jo u r last year. In all, the alarmists — even those as welltempered as the GSR — sought
lo o k
b a c k
in
w o n d e r
a t
m ille n n ia !
Open 6 am- 2pm. Closedwinter Sundays. m a d n e s s
t to prepare citizens for the equiva justice has already been swift. Their sites still rot on the Web, lent o f the w orld’s longest and all updates either abruptly halted least well-timed backpacking trip on January 2, 2000, or turned ever. A nd not a Sherpa in sight. over to such perennial subjects as But don’t unclip those cram the hidden evils o f the Masons, pons or quit that second job yet. the certain com ing of the antiThe true irony is that the New Christ, Roswellian U FO encoun M illennium is still about to begin ters and that eerie face on the — your com puter just doesn’t surface of Mars. Perhaps the know it. Ask any o f the cranky true-true irony o f the New mathematicians who have been M illennium is best found on the cut off in mid-sentence these last Cassandra Project’s W eb site at two years and you’ll hear the www.casssandraproject.com. truth that most first-graders already grasp: when counting, begin from zero. Those o f you I who have been diligently scoop ing bugs from your barreled water all year probably already know this; the rest o f us could care less. W hich brings us to this philosophic koan: If the New M illennium falls in the forest but there’s no com puter there to hear it, is there a noise? As the recent presidential snafu and accompanying fall from grace o f the highest court in the land have ably shown, this last year has only been a test. Had this been a real emergency, there would indeed have been a noise, and that high-pitched screech would have been coming directly from your own vocal cords. T he N ew New M illen nium is about to begin, dawning with the h u rt feelings o f the dis regarded this January 1. W hat terrible retribution will it bring? (You may not know it, but we’d already just barely scraped past another certain apocalypse N am ed for the unheeded prophet even before the prudent partying o f ancient myth, the Cassandra of 1999 turned to the orange Project brought many breathless juice-and-aspirin o f 2000. O n tales o f proposed doom to our August 11, 1999, there was a browsers last year. This is the Grand Fixed Cross in the heav date it offered when I logged on ens, in which the major planets today: “It is currently December o f our galaxy aligned like a stellar 16th, 19100.” H m m m , is it plus sign in uncanny adherence now? It’s also, according to this to the long-published rantings o f cyber-seer, m inus one year past that guy Nostradam us. the new m illennium , as though Anchoring the Cross was a solar we’ve entered some digital BCE eclipse, a m om ent o f daytime age that no one’s been told blackness o f the type ancient about. peoples believed w ould bring the But one o f the new-fangled death o f the age. Pinch yourself. ideas prom pted by last year’s Still here? Me, too.) apocalyptic arousal was perhaps As for the Y2K scaremongers,
fi-Z.t'vt' AM, A. 4
the most old-fangled: com m uni ty. Rather than turning away your heedless neighbors, those idle grasshoppers who played while you toiled at your shelving and instant-soup bins, Y2K purveyors suggested that you try meeting them, working with them, having parties with them, getting to know them. At least that way you’d know the correct names to shout in warning when raising a rifle to their faces over the last package of Little Debbie cakes.
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suburban neighborhoods stealing Cephalon pans and wives’ depilatory cream i dancing in our heads.
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Q uite a concept, that. Perhaps the retribution we can best expect from the com ing of the New New M illennium is a stern, white-bearded, O ld Testament-like resurrection of good manners, kind ways and even the overused meaning behind the phrase, “people skills.” Perhaps the worst to expect is the continued dissolu tion o f them. Let’s hope that we can all move a little closer to embracing these demands — and our neighbors — before the next apocalypse com es... and goes. ©
Less chaos More REcESS in
2001/
5 0 -5 0 %
a ll C lo fh in g 1 FROG HOLLOW ALLEY MIDDLEBURY, VT 05753 • 802/382.9474
_____
J g g f l j e n d a y s v t
december 27, 2 0 0 0 & January 3, 2001
SEVEN DAYS
• c o
page 17
EAMES BROS, (blues/jazz), Pacific
WEDNESDAY JULIET MCVICKER W/JAMES HARVEY & JOHN RIVERS (jazz standards),
Leunig’s, 7:30 p.m. NC. GUY COLASACCO (singer-songwriter),
Jake’s, 6 :30 p.m. NC. LAST NIGHT’S JOY (Irish), R] Ra Irish Pub, 7 p.m. NC. KARAOKE KAPERS (host Bob Bolyard), 135 Pearl, 9 p.m. NC. BLUES JAM W/LEFT EYE JUMP, Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. ONE WAY STREET (rock), Nectar’s, 8 p.m. NC. THE SEMANTICS, THE DIRTY BLONDES
H A PPY BLU E YEA R!
you™
* heard
such mud-caked Delta passion pouring from a northern white guy till you’ve heard Dave Keller. The central Vermont bluesman and his crackerjack band heat up Mountain Roadhouse December 29, Montpelier City Hall on New Year’s Eve (First Night), and Red Square January 10.
(alt-rock/punk), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. $2. DJS SPARKS, RHINO & HI ROLLA (hiphop, reggae), Rasputin’s, 10 p.m. $6. 18+ TEEN NITE HIP-HOP PARTY (DJs Robbie J. & Derrick Brown), Millennium Nightclub-Burlington, 8 p.m. $7. AA OPEN MIKE, Manhattan Pizza & Pub, 9:30 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE W/MATT & BONNIE DRAKE,
Supersexa (as in “super sex, eh?”)
Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. LADIES NIGHT KARAOKE, City Limits, 9 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Mad Mountain Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. TIN PAN ALLEY (acoustic), Charlie B’s, 8:30 p.m. NC. MILLENNIUM POOL TOURNAMENT (’70s'90s DJ; prizes), Millennium Nightclub-Barre, 9 p.m. $3/$7. 18+ STEPT ON (rock), Pickle Barrel, 9 p.m. $5-10.
coming to you, a one-night stand
SETH YACOVONE BLUES BAND,
O LD H O M E W E E K Forget Club Supersexe; we’ve got
Nightspot Outback, 9 p.m. $5-10.
comprising Peg Tassey, Ethan Azarian (visiting from Austin), Alice Austin,
BOOTLESS & UNHORSED (Irish),
Rim, 9 p.m. NC.
Rasputin's, 5 p.m. NC, followed by
OPEN MIKE W/D. DAVIS, Cactus Cafe, 9
TOP HAT DJ, 9 p.m. NC.
p.m. NC.
EVENMIND, PROBLEM BOX, CHEUX, 5 PERCENT JOE & MORE (hardcore/punk),
DAN PARKS & THE BLAME (rock), Steer
& Stein, 9:30 p.m. NC.
242 Main, 7 p.m. $5.
CHAD HOLLISTER & FRIENDS (pop
UNCLE JIM & THE TW INS (acoustic),
rock), Nectar’s, 9 :30 p.m. NC.
Sweetwaters, 9 p.m. NC. DJ LITTLE MARTIN, 135 Pearl, 10 p.m. $4. TORN PORTER “LAST FRONTIER” (art show reception), Club Metronome, 7 p.m. NC, followed by HOUSE PARTY (DJ; ’70s-’80s), 9 p.m. $2. LIVE MUSIC, Red Square, 9 :3 0 p.m. NC. DJ NIGHT, Ri Ra Irish Pub, 10:30 p.m. NC. LION’S DEN HIFI SOUND SYSTEM (reg gae DJs Yosef & Ras Jah I. Red), Manhattan Pizza & Pub, 10 p.m. NC. PERRY NUNN (acoustic guitar), Ruben James, 6 p.m., followed by TOP HAT DJ, 10 p.m. NC. THE NATURALS (rock/r&b), Nectar’s, 9 :3 0 p.m. NC. TEEN NITE (hip-hop party), M illennium Nightclub-Burlington, 6 p.m. $5, fol lowed by FUSION W/DJS ROBBIE J. & FROSTEE (r&b/hip-hop/Latin), 9 p.m. $3/10. 18+ before 11 p.m. KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. BLUES FOR BREAKFAST, Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9 p.m. NC. COMEDY ZONE (stand-up), Radisson Hotel, 8 p.m. $8/6. 18+ DARK HORSE BAND (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC. LATIN DANCE PARTY (dance lessons 8 p.m.; DJ Hector Cobeo), Higher Ground, 9 :3 0 p.m. $6. 18+ BUDDAH & 0X0 (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. $2. KARAOKE W/VERN SHEPARD, Backstage Pub, 9 p.m. NC. JOHN CASSEL (jazz piano)>,'Tavefn' ^ T \q c d the Inn at Essex, 7 p.m. NC. '-H BLACKLIGHT (DJ), Edgewater Pub, 9
VORCZA TRIO (jazz/lounge/funk), Red
Square, 9 :30 p.m. NC. SOAP FLAKES (improv comedy), Club Metronome, 7 p.m., $3, followed by THE STEPH PAPPAS EXPERIENCE, SUPERSEXA, IRRESISTABLE PREDATOR
(blues/alt-rock), 9 p.m. $3. MAD MOUNTAIN SCRAMBLERS (bluegrass), Manhattan Pizza & Pub, 10 p.m. NC. LADIES NIGHT W/DJ ROB JONES (Top 40), Millennium NightclubBurlington, 9 p.m. Women NC/$7; men $2/7. 18+ before 11 p.m. TOP HAT DJ, Rasputin’s, 10 p.m. NC. REGGAE NIGHT (DJ), J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. BUDDAH & 0X0 (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Backstage Pub, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE W/MATT & BONNIE DRAKE,
Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. SUPER SOUNDS KARAOKE, Otter Creek
Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. TNT KARAOKE, Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m.
NC. GALA HOLIDAY SHOW W/BETSY JAMI SON, TIM BEARDEN & DAN JESSIE
(Christmas cabaret), Villa Tragara, 6:30 p.m. $38 w/dinner. RACHEL BISSEX (singer-songwriter), Charlie B’s, 8 :30 p.m. NC. EKIS (funky soul), Matterhorn, 9 p.m. $3-5. COLLEGE NIGHT (house/Top 40), Millennium Nightclub-Barre, 9 p.m. Women NC/$7; men $2/7. 18+ ENTRAIN (modern rock), Pickle Barrel, 9 p.m. $5-10.
James Kochalka and more. The holi day special at Club Metronome
THURSDAY
December 28 promises bawdy music,
NORTH COUNTRY FAIR (Celtic/folk),
ice sculpture and dancers. Itinerant
Upper Deck Pub, 6:3 0 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Jake’s, 6 :30 p.m. NC. ELLEN POWELL & TOM CLEARY (jazz), Leunig’s, 7:30 p.m. NC.
bluesgal Steph Pappas (pictured) and Irresistable Predator make it a night.
29 FRIDAY CLYDE STATS TRIO (jazz), Upper Deck
Pub at the Windjammer, 5:30 p.m. NC.
NC = NO COVER. AA = ALL AGES.
I IS d O M I S I B u y in g . and s e llin g u sed P la y S ta tio n V ideo Games, m usic books, v id e o s, CDs
n r n S A T . 12.31
A242 MAIH/1ST HIGHT EVENTAT EDMUNDS MIDDLE SCHOOL GYM
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CANCERCONSPIRACY John Morden — Certified Astrologer
lYSVI.i i
Vermont's alternative webwaekiy
look busy. page 18
SEVEN DAYS
december 27, 2 00 0 & january 3, 2001
Horary Reading — specific answers Natal Reading — all about you Burlington, VT (802) 6 5 5 -9 113
p.m. NC.
Pub & Brewery, 9 p.m. NC.
MARIE WHITEFORD, JACKSON HEVRIN, TUCKER ANDREW S & MORE (Mt. Mansfield alumni
COMEDY ZONE (stand-up),
music weekend), Village Cup, 8 p.m. NC. LIVE JAZZ, Diamond Jim ’s Grille, 7 :30 p.m. NC. PHIL HENRY BAND (folk-rock), Monopole, 10 p.m. NC. STUR CRAZIE (rock), Franny O’s, 9 p.m. NC. JIM M Y T & THE COBRAS (rock), City-Limits, 9 p.m. NC. GIVENGROOVE, WICKED RICH
(groove rock), Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. $3. TRINIDAD TWA & BEN KOENIG
(Caribbean), Villa Tragara, 6 :30 p.m. $5. JOEY LEONE (acoustic blues), Charlie B’s, 8 :3 0 p.m. NC. LIVE M USIC, Rusty Nail, 9 p.m. $4. SETH YACOVONE BLUES BAND,
Matterhorn, 9 p.m. $3-5. DAVE KELLER BLUES BAND, Moun-
ain Roadhouse, 9 p.m. $3-5. CHAD HOLLISTER (pop rock), Mad Mountain Tavern, 9 p.m. $4. PRIZMA (jazz), J.P. Morgan’s, 7 p.m. NC. EKIS (funky soul), Charlie O’s, 9 p.m. NC. PC THE SPINDOCTOR (house/Top 40), M illennium Nightclub-Barre, 9 p.m. $3/10. 18+ ENTRAIN (modern rock), Pickle Barrel, 9 p.m. $5-10. APATHY JONES (rock), Nightspot Outback, 9 :3 0 p.m. $5-10.
V \
Radisson Hotel, 8 p.m. $8/6. 18+ GUY COLASACCO (singer-song writer), Jake's, 6:3 0 p.m. NC. DARK HORSE BAND (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC. BOB GESSER (jazz guitar), Tuckaway’s, Sheraton Hotel, 9 p.m. NC. STRANGEFOLK, SHADRACH (jam rock), Higher Ground, 9 p.m. $ 1 5 /2 0 . 18+ Sold out. BUDDAH & 0X0 (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. $2. EMPTY POCKETS (rock), Backstage Pub, 9 p.m. NC. BLACKLIGHT (DJ), Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. MARIE WHITEFORD, JACKSON HEVRIN, TUCKER ANDREWS & MORE (Mt. Mansfield alumni
music weekend), Village Cup, 8 p.m. NC. OPIUS (jazz-groove), Monopole, 10 p.m. NC. KARAOKE W/FRANK, Franny O’s, 9 p.m. NC. DJ DANCE PARTY, City Limits, 9 p.m. NC. NOBBY REED PROJECT (blues), Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. $3. ANTHONY SANTOR & TOM CLEARY
SATURDAY
(jazz), Capitol Grounds, 7 :30 p.m. NC. SPINN CITY W/DJ ROBBIE J. (hiphop/r&b), M illennium NightclubBarre, 9 p.m. $3/10. 18+ THE DETONATORS (blues/r&b), Gallagher’s, 9 p.m. $3. EKIS (funky soul), Mad Mountain Tavern, 9 p.m. $4. JASON CANN (singer-songwriter), Charlie B’s, 8 :3 0 p.m. NC. JOEY LEONE W/HORNS (bluesrock), Matterhorn, 9 p.m. $3-5.
DJ LITTLE MARTIN, 135 Pearl, 10
BLUE FOX & THE ROCKIN’ DADDYS
p.m. $4. THE X-RAYS (rock/r&b), Nectar's,
9 :30 p.m. NC. RETRONOME (DJ; dance pop), Club Metronome, 10 p.m. $2. ADDISON GROOVE PROJECT, Red Square, 9 :3 0 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. DJS TIM DIAZ & RUGGER (hiphop/r&b), Ruben James, 10 p.rm NC. FLASHBACK (’80s DJ), Rasputin’s, 10 p.m. NC.
(blues-rock), Mountain Roadhouse, 9 p.m. $3-5. LIVE MUSIC, Rusty Nail, 9 p.m. $4. JOHN LACKARD BLUES BAND, Blue Tooth, 9:3 0 p.m. $2. ENGINE #9 (modern rock), Pickle Barrel, 9 p.m. $5-10. APATHY JONES (rock), Nightspot Outback, 9 :3 0 p.m. $5-10.
DAVE KELLER BLUES BAND,
CHILDREN, THE MAGIC IS GONE, DISILLUSIONED
Montpelier City Hall, 9 p.m. First Night button.
(hardcore/pu n k/a It/techcore), Edmunds Gym, 4 p.m. First Night button.
BLUE FOX & THE ROCKIN’ DADDYS
5 p.m. $15.
(blues-rock), Charlie O’s, 9 p.m. NC. TIN PAN ALLEY (acoustic), Charlie B’s, 8 :3 0 p.m. NC. .
A GRATEFUL NEW YEAR W/BLUES FOR BREAKFAST, Halvorson’s 10
FLETCHER (7-pc. dance band),
NEW YEAR’S EVE CELEBRATION W/DJ LITTLE MARTIN, 135 Pearl,
FAMILIAR TERRITORY W /TAMMY
p.m. $5.
Rusty Nail, 9 p.m. $0..
GRIPPO FUNK BAND, Red Square,
ELMORE MOUNTAIN (blues), Sam’s
9:3 0 p.m. NC. CARNIVAL (DJ Luis Calderin & more), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. $5. THE X-RAYS (rock/r&b), Nectar’s, 9 :3 0 p.m. NC.
Charlmont, 9 p.m. $35/50. NEW YEAR WINTER BALL (hiphop/house/Top 40 DJ PC the Spindoctor), M illennium Nightclub-Barre, 8 p.m. $5/10. 18+
NEW YEAR WINTER BALL
FREELANCE BISHOPS
(reggae/hip-hop/house DJs Chancellor, Ninjahforce, Frostee, Irie), Millennium NightclubBurlington, 7 p.m. $6/12. 18+ TOP HAT DJ (hip-hop), Rasputin's, 9 p.m. $5. CURRENTLY NAMELESS (jam rock), Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9 p.m. NC. DARK HORSE BAND (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. $15/25. QUADRA, ABAIR BROS, (classic rock; final Quadra gig), Tuckaway's, Sheraton Hotel, 8 p.m. $99/couple. STRANGEFOLK, SHADRACH (jam rock), Higher Ground, 9 p.m. $15/20. 18+ Sold out. SAND BLIZZARD (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. $20. GIVENGROOVE (groove rock), Champion’s Tavern, 9:3 0 p.m. NC. BUILT FOR COMFORT (rock), Backstage Pub, 9 p.m. $5. BLACKLIGHT (DJ), Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, Sami’s Harmony Pub, 9 p.m. NC.
(funk/rock/blues), Blue Tooth, 9:3 0 p.m. $20. ENGINE #9, MAC & JAMIE (modern rock), Pickle Barrel, 9 p.m. $5-
10.
MONDAY h a p p y n e w y e a r! OPEN MIKE W/OXO, Nectar’s, 9
p.m. NC.
2 TUESDAY RED THREAD W/RANDY CROSBY, JOHN CREECH & BILL PATTON
(jazz), Leunig’s, 7:30 p.m. NC. PUB QUIZ (trivia game w/prizes), Ri Ra, 8 :4 5 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Burlington Coffeehouse, 8 p.m. Donations. ZINGO W/ZENO (drag bingo), 135 Pearl, 8 p.m. Donations. PRIMITIVE LOUNGE, Red Square, 9 :30 p.m. NC. LIVE MUSIC, Club Metronome, 9 p.m. NC. JAMES THACKER TRIO (blues), Nectar’s, 9 p.m. NC. TOP HAT DJ, Rasputin’s, 9 p.m.
NOCTURNAL EMISSIONS, CIRCUS
$15/25. SEVEN (jazz-groove), Monopole,
10 p.m. NC.
FROSTEE & TOXIC (hip-
weekly
WRECKINGHORN, DROWNINGMAN, THE CANCER CONSPIRACY, DYSFUNKSHUN, CHAINSAW S AND
ACT, HEX 9 (rock), G Stop, 9 p.m.
THE CLUBB M IXX W/DJS IRIE,
hop/house), M illennium Nightclub-Burlington, 9 p.m. $3/10. 18+ before 11 p.m. JACK TRIPPER (rock), Vermont
(rock), Otter Creek Tavern, 9 :30 p.m. NC. DJ DANCE PARTY, City Limits, 9 p.m. NC. ' THE DETONATORS (blues/r&b), Gallagher's, 9 p.m. $3. U.N.I. (reggae), Mad Mountain Tavern, 9 p.m. $20.
Sweetwaters, 11:30 a.m. NC. S C O n MCALLISTER (jazz guitar), Borders, 4 p.m. NC, followed by JOSH BROOKS (singer-songwriter), 6 p.m. NC.
DJ LEVI, HIGH FALSE (house/tech;
SUNDAY
rock), Ground Zero, 10 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, Franny O’s, 9 p.m. NC.
n e w y e a r ’s e v e DAYVE HUCKETT (jazz guitar),
listings
on
NEW YEAR’S EVE PARTY W/C4
continued on page 2 4
www.sevendaysvt.com
w h e re to g o Adams Apple Caf6, Portland & Main streets, Morrisville, 888 -47 37. After Dark Music Series, Town Hall Theater, 53 Merchants Row, Middlebury, 388-0216. Alley Cats, 41 King St., Burl., 6 60 -43 04. Angela’s Pub, 86 Main St., Middlebury, 388 -00 02. Backstage Pub, 6 0 Pearl St., Essex Jet., 878 -54 94. Blue Tooth, Access Rd., Warren, 583-2656. Boony’s, Rt. 236, Franklin, 933 -45 69. Borders Books & Music, 29 Church St., Burlington, 865 -27 11. Brownstone Tavern, 2 Center St. Alley, Rutland, 7 75 -80 98. Burlington Coffeehouse at Rhombus, 186 College St., Burlington, 864 -58 88. Cactus Cafe, 1 Lawson Ln., Burl., 862 -69 00. Cambridge Coffeehouse, Windridge Bakery, Jeffersonville, 644 -22 33. Capjtol Grounds, 4 5 State St., Montpelier, 223 -78 00. Champion’s, 32 Main St., Winooski, 655 -47 05. Charlie O’s, 7 0 Main St., Montpelier, 223 -68 20. Chow! Bella, 28 N. Main St., St. Albans, 524 -14 05. City Limits, 14 Greene St. Vergennes, 877 -69 19. Club Metronome, 188 Main St., Burlington, 865 -45 63. Cobbweb, Sandybirch Rd., Georgia, 527 -70 00. Deerieap Books, 25 Main St., Bristol, 453 -56 84. Diamond Jim’s Grille, Highgate Comm. Shpg. Ctr., St. Albans, 524-9280. Dockside Cafe, 209 Battery, Burlington, 864 -52 66. Edgewater Pub, 340 Malletts Bay Ave., Colchester, 865-4214. Finnigan’s Pub, 205 College St., Burlington, 864 -82 09. Flynn Center/FlynnSpace, 153 Main St., Burlington, 863 -59 66. Franny O’s 7 3 3 Queen City Pk. Rd., Burlington, 863 -29 09. Gallagher's, Rt. 100, Waitsfield, 4 96 -88 00. Good Times Cafe, Hinesburg Village, Rt. 1 1 6 ,4 8 2 -4 4 4 4 . Ground Zero, 3 Durkee St., Plattsburgh, N.Y., 518 -56 6-69 69. Heartwood Hollow Gallery Stage, 76 5 0 Main Rd., Hanksville, 434583 0/88 8-2 12-1142. Henry’s, Holiday Inn, 1068 Williston Rd., S. Burlington, 863-6361. Higher Ground, 1 Main St., Winooski, 654-8888. Jake's, 1233 Shelburne Rd., S. Burlington, 658 -22 51. James Moore Tavern, Bolton Valley Ski Area, 434 -3 4 4 4 . J.P. Morgan’s at Capitol Plaza, 100 Main St., Montpelier, 223 -52 52. J.P.’s Pub, 139 Main St., Burlington, 658 -63 89. The Kept Writer, 5 Lake St., St. Albans, 527 -62 42. Leunig’s, 115 Church St., Burlington, 863 -37 59. Mad Mountain Tavern, Rt. 100, Waitsfield, 496 -25 62. Manhattan Pizza & Pub, 167 Main St., Burlington, 658 -67 76. Matterhorn, 4 96 9 Mountain Rd., Stowe, 253 -81 98. Millennium Nightclub-Barre, 230 N. Main St., Barre, 476 -35 90. Millennium Nightclub-Burlington, 165 Church St., Burlington, 660 -20 88. Monopole, 7 Protection Ave., Plattsburgh, N.Y., 518 -56 3-22 22. Mountain Roadhouse, 1677 Mountain Rd., Stowe, 253-2800. Nectar's, 188 Main St., Burlington, 658 -47 71. Old Firehouse, 13 Mill St., Hardwick, 472 -68 57. Ollie's, 13 Evelyn St., Rutland, 7 73 -37 10. 135 Pearl St., Burlington, 863 -23 43. Otter Creek Tavern, 215 Main St., Vergennes, 877 -36 67. Pacific Rim, 111 St. Paul St., Burlington, 651 -30 00. Pickle Barrel, Killington Rd., Killington, 4 22 -30 35. Radisson Hotel, 60 Battery St., Burlington, 658 -65 00. Rasputin’s, 163 Church St., Burlington, 864 -93 24. Red Square, 136 Church St., Burlington, 859 -89 09. Rhombus, 186 College St., Burlington, 865 -31 44. Ripton Community Coffee House, Rt. 125, 388-9782. Ri Ra the Irish Pub, 123 Church St., Burlington, 860 -94 01. Ruben James, 159 Main St., Burlington, 864-0744. Rusty Nail, Mountain Rd., Stowe, 253-6245. Sai-Gon Cafe, 133 Bank St., Burlington, 863 -56 37. Sami’s Harmony Pub, 216 Rt. 7, Milton, 893 -72 67. Sam’s Charlmont, Rt. 15, Morrisville, 888 -42 42. Signal to Noise HQ, 4 1 6 Pine St. (behind Speeder & Earl’s), Burlington, 951-1140. Starksboro Community Coffee House, Village Meeting House, Rt. 116, Starksboro, 4 34 -42 54. Steer & Stein Pub, 147 N. Winooski Ave., 862 -74 49. Sweetwaters, 118 Church St., Burlington, 864-9800. The Tavern at the Inn at Essex, Essex Jet., 878 -11 00. Thirsty Turtle, 1 S. Main St., Waterbury, 2 44 -52 23. Trackside Tavern, 18 Malletts Bay Ave., Winooski, 655-9542. T. Rugg’s Tavern, 149 Elmwood Ave., Burlington, 6 58 -04 56. Tuckaway’s, Sheraton, 870 Williston Rd., S. Burlington, 865 -66 00. UpperDeck Pub at the Windjammer, 1076 Williston Rd., S. Burlington, 862-6585. Valencia, Pearl St. & S. Winooski, Ave., Burlington, 658-8978. Vermont Pub & Brewery, 144 College, Burlington, 865 -05 00. The Village Cup, 30 Rt. 15, Jericho, 899 -17 30. Villa Tragara, Rt. 100, Waterbury Ctr., 244 -52 88.
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W ELL, I'LL BE A MONKEY'S UNCLE IF THAT'S NOT THE BIGGEST DARN CALENDAR I'VE EVER SEEN! december 27, 2 0 0 0 & january 3, 2001
SEVEN DAYS
page 19
2000 in Review ince the world did not end as scheduled on December 31, 1999, we’re still here to report on another year’s worth of music news, and the comings and goings — literally — of local musi cians. The year did bring an end, however, to several Burlington bands — as well as some departures out of state. Midlife Chrysler rocked in the new year with a final gig — and a promise to hit the recording studio. Hey, we haven’t seen the results of that yet, people. Bands that would deliver^their swan songs later in the year include The
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WITH MANY OTHER SPECIAL CUESTS
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T O D D T H IB A U D SATURDAY, JANUARY 20 • S7 AT DOOR
JOHN BROWN'S BODY D U D E O F L IF E SUNDAY, JANUARY 21 • S12ADV. $14 DAY OF SHOW• ALL AGES EARLY SHOW: DOORS 7PM • ON SALE 12/27
FRANK BLACK & THE CATHOLICS Z O LA TORN T H E M A GIC IS G O N E TUESDAY, JANUARY 23 • S13 ADVANCE $15 DAY DF SHOW ON SALE 12/27 • VT ALLSTARS GLASS & GEAR PRESENT
MERL SAUNDERS K E L L E R W IL L IA M S WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 24 • $7 21+ $918+
ZEN TRICKSTERS PSYCHEDELIC BREAKFEST FRIDAY, JANUARY 26 • S7 AT DOOR
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page 20
SEVEN DAYS
l
headed for the Big Apple, joining other members of Orange Factory, all of whom would go on to make names for themselves in club and label land throughout the year. Bag O f Panties — including Seven Days circulation manager Glenn Severance — took off for NYC, too. Not much noise from the Panties has reached us since then, but Glenn has a nice job at the Village Voice. V ' Thankfully, some musicians moved to the state rather than out of it in 2000. In January, bluegrass band Limberjack County got its Green Mountain bearings at Manhattan Pizza &c Pub — mandolinist Beau Stapleton would later take off on tour with the majorly itinerant Sm okin’ Grass. The Burlington Coffeehouse celebrated its 10th anniversary in January — which means the 11th is coming right up. Despite another surgery this year, organiz er extraordinaire Jeff Miller is still going at it, booking national, regional and up-and-coming local . folksters in the modest Rhombus Gallery space. Let’s hear it for unflagging music promoters! An institution that barely sur vived, though, was 242 Main. The Burlington teen center and host of many a young loud band survived personnel crises and budget deficits, eventually hiring Drowningman vocalist Simon Brody as de facto manager, and establishing a board that also includes DysFunkShun rapper Richard Bailey. The club held a lot of benefit concerts over the year — the musical equivalent to bake sales — in order to keep on keepin’ on. The popular Last Chance Saloon, however, finally took its last gasp — the 27-year-old underground bar, host to many a rowdy Irish-music gig with Bootless & Unhorsed, and even more besotted college students, closed its doors in January to make way for the Flynn Theatre takeover. It was radically trans formed later in the year into the
handsome, multi-purpose Flynnspace, which would debut as a smoke-free music venue with jazz pianist/vocalist Patricia Barber in the fall. Oh, and Bootless, meanwhile, galloped around to various nightspots, cur rently stabled at Rasputin’s on Fridays. Former FagS frontman Eugene Nikolaev continued to make waves as a model with a moustache. You’d think no one had discovered hair on lips before, what with all the pop-analysis going on in otherwise sensible publications like The New York Times and the Wall Street Journal about what this trend could possi bly mean. Not that anyone came to any brilliant conclusions, but the former Burlingtonian-by-wayof-Ukraine, now inexplicably going by Eugene Hutz, got a lot of mileage out of it — all the way to the cover of the Italian L’Uomo Vogue. His new band, Gogol Bordello, appealed to jaded New Yorkers, too, but as far as I can tell the moustache thing didn’t exactly take off. In the most blessed event since the Immaculate Deception, Burlington drag queen Yolanda gave birth at February’s “Winter is a Drag Bali.” Actually, I’m not sure what he/she ended up with, but the event, as always, gave spe cial meaning to being crowned Queen and King, and raised money for the Vermont People with AIDS Coalition. It was not the first nor the last occasion that Vermont musicians would give generously of their time and talent to good causes — heralded regu larly in the “Do Good Dept.” in this column. Yolanda, with or without the Plastic Family, would go on to wow ’em in New York and further afield this year. An unpublicized but neverthe less sold-out show with Phish bassist M ike Gordon, Jazz Mandolin Projects Jamie Masefield and guitarist Doug Perkins of Smokin’ Grass got the
new Starksboro Coffee House off to a good start in February. The venue has continued to bring monthly relief — though not such big names — to entertainmentstarved locals. It’s not the only venue to hang in there, with vol unteer support, in rural Vermont. Kudos go to the community cof feehouses in Ripton, Cambridge and Jericho, among others. Mike Bandelato, of All Points Booking, took the director reins of the Discover Jazz Festival from Jimmy Swift, who moved over to the helm of First Night (not very far, as they’re in the same office). With less than four months until Burlington’s annual jazz fest, he had his work cut out for him. Speaking of cutting, Zola Turn drummer Rachel Bischoff went and tore a couple of ligaments and cracked her femur in a skiing
december 27, 2 0 0 0 & january 3, 2001
IT’S NOT PH0REVER This year Phish announced they’re taking a much-deserved break — maybe two years. mishap, which proved once again that flying through the air is fun — until you land. Later knee surgery would allow her to whomp hell out of her kick drum once again, and Burlington’s girlgroup rockers hit the road on a regular basis. The new Vermont state song, ostensibly voted in the previous year but not yet officially approved, ran into a snag in the legislature when the committee in charge of such things tripped over itself with some nonsense about copyright issues. But the grum bling led some to suspect a whiff of homophobic paranoia among members of the civil-union-belea guered legislators — the arranger/accompanist for song writer Diane Martin is a lesbian. Thankfully, everything was even tually sorted out and Martin’s tune, “These Green Mountains,” was signed into officialdom in May, replacing that old, unsingable one by what’s-hername. We’re not sure what Mitch Cantor was sitting on over there at the plucky Burlington label Gadfly, but it wasn’t his laurels. He released multiple CDs this year, usually in quartets, including new material from such almostfamous types as Don Dixon, as well as local bluegrass gods Breakaway. Meanwhile, Big Heavy World added “label” to its mighty repertoire, taking on pro jects by Chin Ho! and Chainsaws and Children. The Ho-meisters would take the prize for most songs used on twentysomething television programs, most notably MTV’s “Road Rules.” BHW’s Jim Lockridge, on the other hand, would take a bride, the lovely VPR Operations Manager Victoria St. John. Later in the year, the couple announced they were expecting a non-virtual bun dle of joy. We were thrilled to discover that rock writer Camden Joy had relocated to Montpelier last March, and, after we reviewed his novel, Boy Islandwe even per suaded him to do a little writing for Seven Days. Unfortunately, he moved away again come August, when his wife took some dumb high-paying job as a corporate lawyer in Boston. Local songwriter, sometime performer and “housekeeper to
the stars” Diane Horstmyer came up with a share-brained idea last spring: a “slush fund” for starving artists to use in case of emergen cies, or maybe guitar strings. In March she and a gaggle of friends organized a black-and-white ball called Fools’ Paradise to raise some funds for the slush, called Fools’ Gold. Dunno who’s dipped into it since, but we thought it was a thoughtful notion... Atlantic Crossing did just that last March — headed across the sea for their first-ever tour of the islands from which their Celtic tunage spawned. Inspiration from that trip surely figured into the fine recording, appropriately titled Far and Away, the band released at the end of the year. We heard from former Burlington rocker Dave Jarvis in April, return address Fort Benning, Georgia. Yep, he’d joined the Army, which apparent ly promised to prepare him for a career in “communications,” whatever that means. I thought he communicated just fine in Cranial Perch, but I guess there’s nothing like boot camp to make a guy speak more clearly. And speaking of push-ups, local songstress Rachel Bissex would see her 18year-old “baby” enlist come fall. Sniff. Ben Cohen was back in bold last April for his hip-hop efforts. The rap song he’d previously recorded, “Move Our Money” — a plea for reapportioning a frac tion of the Pentagon’s budget to health and education — won the attention of real rapper Chuck D of Public Enemy. Along with pro ducer Professor Griff, the D agreed to sprinkle the tune with some magic studio dust and maybe hit the talk-show circuit with Cohen. But that was before the sale of his relatively little ice cream company to the giant Unilever, and we haven’t heard a peep about it since. We did get another chunky scoop of Cohen in August, however, when he was named “Parent of the Month” in Parents magazine. There he was, demonstrating the disparities in the military and everything-else budgets with stacks of Oreos. Also in April, Jazz Mandolin Project was signed to the venera ble jazz label Blue Note — man-
continued on page 22
Band name of the week:
F a n c y p a n tS
SA M ADAM S PRESENTS
VERMO LARGEST NEW YEA EVE PARTY
Top Vermont 1
0
Recordings
I Its
Year
■
non-stop music includes:
FAM ILIAR TERRITORY 7-piece dance band from NYC
FLETCHER MC
a good thing the year 2000 arrived without the dreaded Y2K meltdown, or any other doomsday scenario (remember those?), otherwise we might be too busy collecting firewood and fighting over saved rainwater to compile this list. Come to think of it, Vermont musicians would have been hard-pressed to even make these recordings. Let’s just stop right here and have a moment of silence for electricity, and perhaps another 30 seconds for digital technology. As it is, winnowing the output o f Vermont-made recordings over 12 months is hard enough. O n the other hand, the produc tivity level in local original music projects remained fairly consis tent with last year’s — which is to say, down from the outrageous ly prolific 1998 (especially rock). Given the influx of new bands in the area this year, though, 2001 just might bring a deluge of little flat packages to our mailbox. Hint: To increase chances of a favorable review, send choco lates. Just kidding.
WCH MORE! V
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D
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MARIJUANA?
L_J
Where were we? Yes. If anyone is actually reading this and did n’t just selfishly skip to the list below, let us explain that, in order to reach our arbitrarily imposed limit o f 10, we decided to elimi nate from consideration EPs, which unfortunately struck out Chin H oi’s excellent Girl, among others. We also removed compi lations, releases by local musicians on major labels, such as The Jazz M andolin Q uartet {Xenoblasi) and Phish (Farmhouse), and projects by form er Vermonters, such as Bag o f Panties ( Tomorrow W ill Be M y Dancing Day). Perhaps we should also state the obvious: that our contenders were from those CDs actually reviewed this year in Seven Days. Any recordings we received too late in December will be consid ered next year. Finally, in the case of bands with more than one item in their discography, we found ourselves comparing this year’s release against previous ones... that we might have thought were better. So, let us lay to rest any suspicions this list is arrived at by coin toss, lottery or butterfly ballots. We thought long and hard on this one because, you know, we really love all our children equally.
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And now, before the real millennium comes to an end, here are our choices for the top 10 Vermont recordings of 2000, listed in no particular order.
uutlli gpurawi
1. Gregory Douglass,
Johnny A
Gregory Douglass 2. Starline Rhythm Boys,
Better Luck is a Barroom Away 3. The Halogens,
Gin and Nothing 4. DysFunkShun,
Hi-Fi Stereotype 5. Patti Casey,
Under Different Skies 6. W ill Patton,
Latitudes and Departures 7. Atlantic Crossing,
Far and Away 8. Drowningman,
Rock and R oll K illin g Machine 9. Strangefolk,
A Great Long While 10. Buck & the B lack Cats,
Ask fo r Buck & the Black Cats
Tickets available at the F lynn R e g io n a l Box O ffic e , 153 M ain St. B u rlin g to n , VT (M F 10arn 5pm, Sat 11am 4pm), or charge by phone at a i
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145 cherry st, burlington 863-0539 y bsldeburlinqton.coi&^
— Pamela Polston
december 27, 200 0 & January 3, 2001 { iu - .u
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SEVEN DAYS ' LV
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page 21 0-§£«*
In April, this paper’s semi annual Music Issue featured Greg Douglass in a cover story. The exuberantly talented young singer-songwriter would release his second CD, self-titled and bursting with passion, before the end of the year — and still under 20. Central Vermont singer-songwriter Patti Casey was thrilled to be selected as a finalist for the prestigious Kerrville Folk Festival, and would be a lot more excited when she won it in May — while seven-and-half months pregnant. She also put out a lovely CD, Under Different Skies, that proved her a winner in the studio as well as on stage. Oh, and she also “released” a baby boy, Liam Martin Casey, in August. Now that’s productive. In May, Eclipse Studio guy Joe Egan announced he’d be breaking ground on a brandnew, and much bigger, studio at Fort Ethan Allen in Colchester. Accordingly, the name would change to reflect his enhanced abilities: Egan Media Prod uctions. Meanwhile, another Ethan Allen namesake — the bowling alley — called it quits, effectively knocking the pins out from under the occasional Rock ’n’ Bowl parties held, to make way for Hannafords.
rhYtHm&nEws continued from page 20
dolinist Jamie Masefield is a resident of Vermont, at least when he’s not on the road with his New York-based bandmates. The trio’s first Blue Note release was Xenoblast. Non Compos Mentis, Never Again, Drowningman and Chin
Ho! were among the bands that got pretty fluffed at mp3.com last April when their original material was ripped off on the music Web site. Under the guise of a fake band name, one ballsy/stupid thief even sold loosely disguised NCM record ings in similar packaging — and identical tunes. Burlington bands weren’t the only ones to com plain, especially when the alleged humans operating the giant site failed to do much about it. Mp3.com would lose more points in Burlington in July, when following the site’s artist showcase at Club Metronome, the tour manager refused to pay participant Kate Barclay as promised. She had been invited to join Emily Richardson, The Clear and Johnny Society on the local stop of the national tour. The music industry may be in the grip of high-tech, but get ting ripped off is as old as the hills. In the end, club owner M ark Gauthier paid Barclay out of his own pocket when he heard what happened. Later, my report would reach another disgruntled mp3 human, who promptly put a block on Barclay’s page at the site.
James Kochalka Superstar
was all over the May issue of Comics Journal, including the cover and a 20-page feature inside on the prolific Burlington cartoonist and music-maker. The following month, he would win over hordes of Scandinavian rock
fans at a music festival in Sweden. Later in the year, he would publish three more car toon books. Also in May, Phish provided the cover story for Down Beat magazine, in an issue celebrating “innovation and improvisation above the glitz and grandstand ing associated with most of today’s popular music.” Ouch. It must have been let’s-pay-attention-to-Vermonters month, ’cause Chin Ho! frontman Andrew Smith was interviewed in In Newsweekly, a regional mag for gay/lesbian/bi readers, and Yolanda was interviewed on GAYBC.com. Later in the sum mer, young bluesman Seth YacOVOne would get his national ink, in Relix— and we would be compelled to stop calling him “bluesboy,” as he turned 21. Trey Anastasio would grace the July cover of Guitar Player, and the whole band was gushed over, “meet the Beatles”-style, in an August Entertainment Weekly. Never mind the occasional sight ings in Rolling Stone. At the end of May, viperHoUSe lost three members — vocalist Heloise Williams, trumpeter Brian Boyce and per cussionist P.J. Davidian took off for individual reasons. But after paying tribute to themselves at a wailin’ Higher Ground finale, the band would go forward quite ably as a leaner, meaner sextet — with new tenor sax player Zack Tennyson.
All Points Booking finally found a venue they’d been seek ing for an outdoor concert series:
b e n e f i t
SALE
JOYFUL NO ISE
Had enough of “Away in a Manger” and
“Little Drummer Boy?” Then pick up a First Night button and head over to the most gratifyingly loud show on the schedule: DysFunkShun (pictured) at the Edmunds Gym. The rippin’ hip-hoppers will be joined by fellow rockers Wreckinghorn, The Cancer Conspiracy, Drowningman, Chainsaws and Children, The Magic Is Gone and Disillusioned. Burlington, New Year’s Eve.
Bolton Valley. The promoters would bring The Tragically Hip, Bela Fleck with Medeski, Martin and Wood, Widespread Panic and Lyle Lovett to the
scenic hillside through the sum mer — with mixed financial results, but enough encourage ment, we hope, to try again next year. Over at WCAX, arts reporter Brian Byrnes got a wild hair to put musicians — live — on the air at 7 in the morning on Fridays. It was only a five or sixminute segment, bookended by news and weather, but the pro gram gave the lie to the myth that musicians can’t get out of bed before noon. He would fea ture a few dozen local luminar
for an interesting college Call 862-9616 now for your free Spring 2001 Burlington College Course Bulletin!
DECEMBER,30, 10-5 Olive & Bette’s has had such
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Center SALE CLOTHING $ 1 0 SALE ACCESSORIES $ 5 Michael Stars, Theory, Shoshanna, Earl Jeans & more
ies, including Tammy Fletcher, Rachel Bissex and Katherine Quinn, before departing for an overseas job in the fall. Chainsaws and Children were among the bands that per formed at the opening — finally! — of Burlington’s skatepark last summer, motivating Mayor Peter Clavelle to name July 3, 2000, “Chainsaws and Children Day.” Surely they’re the only industrial-strength band to ever be so condoned by a city official. C&C would play for a horde of hackers at a DefCom convention in Vegas the following month. “Mr. Charlie” Frazier got a call for an interview on an Athens radio station later in July. Why? Because his latest compila-
• Acting Techniques for Film and Stage • Claymation • Film Production I & II • Introduction to Animation • Non-Linear Editing • Screenwriting • Philosophy through Literature • Creativity: Awakening and Cultivating the Imaginative Mind
• Celtic Scotland • History of Women in North America • Memoir and Autobiography • Painting Techniques • Photography: Black and White • Poetry Seminar • Symbolism: Language of the Soul • Topics in Art History: Egyptian Art
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every'year, for afew weeksat time.” Guitar hero, indeed;V
tiorv Best o f the Green Mountain Blues, Vol. 4,, was going gangbusters on Radio Pica. Damn if he wasnV Qrateful... .His fans might have said “it’s Greek to me” if they were to visit the Burlington club scene, which took an unfortunate turn for the bureaucratic last summer. That’s when the City Council decided to “address” the problem of under-age drinking by imposing several draconian layers of red tape on club owners. Not only did this throw more water on the ebbing flame of “personal responsibility” regarding alcohol consumption, but made it virtu ally impossible — or at least unaffordable — for clubs to host 18+ nights. The new rules are too com plicated to even repeat here, but suffice it to say that it was yet another blow to young people who, we might as well deduce, should get pissed off and drink in the alleyways, spray graffiti in frustration, and shoplift out of boredom. Or maybe work harder at procuring those fake IDs. Yeah, baby, this was a brilliant display of progressive govern ment. Remember the raging forest fires out West last summer? One Vermont musician got all choked up about ’em — literally. Addison County forester Eric Bresnick, a guitarist in a band named Toast (his former band was Trial By Fire), went to blazes in August. His bandmates, who had to cancel a gig at the Otter Creek Tavern, shrugged philosophically that “it happens
T U
proved his cool once again when he was seen downloading the Grateful Dead’s “Touch of Grey” during the Napster hearings in August. Long before the presi dential election came down to a court decision, our vote went to Pat for Prez. ■ In more Phish news, the philanthropic pisceans donated $100,000, via their Waterwheel Foundation, to the Conservation Law Foundation to assist efforts to clean up the almost sixth Great Lake, Champlain. Waterwheel is funded, in turn, by a portion of the receipts at concerts and from profits of all that Ben & Jerry’s Phish Food you’ve been eating. The Dave Keller Blues Band
are still just that at year’s end, even though last September Dave restlessly announced he was looking for a new moniker. He even encouraged public sug gestions, but apparently none appealed. Or maybe he just got distracted by his new bride? The Phish documentary Bittersweet Motel hit screens nationwide in August; in our cover story about the movie, and filmmaker Todd Phillips, we revealed the year’s biggest news, that the guys would be going on an extended hiatus after their fall tour. The New York Times would confirm this, big-time, in an October article that also lauded the band for hosting the world’s largest New Year’s Eve concert last year in Florida. By year’s
D o s t /C o p t S o o r o t in
*
end, a lot of the now-unneces sary personnel would be cleared out of Phish’s Dionysian Productions office in Burlington. In September, another venue bit the dust, but not before get ting in hot water for under-age serving and other no-nos: Club 156, in the bad-karma location on St. Paul St. The space would soon get a new.look, new name — Fuel — and a new lease on life as a smoke- and alcohol-free all-ages club. Unfortunately, that life was short, as building owner Bret Kernoff had major person nel issues and, ultimately, inade quate traffic through the door. The place closed again within months. On the other side of the lake! a huge new nightclub called Ground Zero opened with great promise and an aeronautical theme — owher Tim Carter is a pilot. Though the club booked some Vermont acts in the begin ning, the live-band thing has apparently not appealed as much as the live-DJ thing — a chal lenge to original music on both sides of the pond, actually: Burlington’s DJ scene grew apace in 2000, as turntablism has grown into an art form of its own. In October, musical support ers of Progressive gubernatorial wannabe Anthony Pollina bor rowed a page from Perry Farrell and put together a four-stop mini-tour called Pollinapalooza. The bill for this free concert included Peg Tassey, Tommy Law, DysFunkShun and The Flying Albanians, among others.
Though Pollina would end up with less than 10 percent of the ‘ votes come November, he at least proved that some third-party candidates know how to party — not to mention run a decent, issues-oriented campaign. In October, too, Seven Days’ fall Music Issue featured another young prodigy on its cover: the 18-year-old fiddler Patrick ROSS. Deferring a scholarship to the Berklee School of Music, he took the year off to tour with Sm okin’ Grass.
In that issue, too, we noted the progress of the ever-evolving Big Heavy World, which now includes not only ah online record store and a mini-label, but a 24/7 online local-music radio station. Meanwhile, Kevin Murrihy, host of the Buzz “Homebrew” local-music show on Sunday eves, announced he was holding a competition for a new theme songlet. Tired of James Kochalka’s distinctive scream? Perhaps. We’ll have to hold our breaths on that one. As the world — well, Americans, anyway — waited for a new President to be sorted out through all the dimpled, preg nant and otherwise messed-with chads, Burlington music fans took decisive action by buying tickets to not one but two nights’ worth of the “Concert for a Landmine-Free World” at the Flynn Center. The traveling show, which would bring to town Emmylou Harris, Bruce
Griffith and Steve Earle, dearly V; appealed to p.ic. Vermonters — § the Flynn booked a second show when the more blase Providence crowd showed so little interest that the date was canceled. The activist entertainers came and went, and we still didn’t have a President. Except for good ol’ Lame Duck Bill, of course. Aside from Christmas shop ping, not much else happened in December except that those a cappella nice guys Random A sso c iation held yet another benefit; former Smokin’ Grass mandolinist Jason Koornick introduced a new bluegrass unit, The Ridgerunners; 5 Seconds Expired got back together; Strangefolk announced two new members and sold out two nights at Higher Ground; new establishments opened in Milton and Morrisville — Sami’s Harmony Bar and Sam’s Charlmont (old Charlmont, new owner), respectively; and, oh, yes, the Supreme Court ruled. Finally, people, we have a win ner. Well, maybe not a winner, exactly. But we do have a Presi dent who presages at least four years of Bush-league leadership. The inevitable skits on “Saturday Night Live” sound more promis ing. Comedy central, indeed. That is, if it’s not too tragic. But there’s one thing we can definitely look forward to: 2001, which, if it doesn’t prove to be a space oddity, will at least usher in a lot more local music. More bal lads, fewer ballots, I say. Happy New Year! ®
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Monday, January 8 4:30-6:00pm Admissions Office
sOUnd AdviCe
continued from page 19
NC. 18+ BASHMENT (DJ John Demus; reg-
gae/dancehall), Ruben James, 10 p.m. NC. 0X0N0ISE (rock), J.P.’s Pub, 9:3 0 p.m. NC.
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hop, reggae), Rasputin’s, 10 p.m. $6. 18+ COLLEGE NIGHT W/DJ ROBBIE J. (7 0 s & ’80s), Millennium NightclubBurlington, 9 p.m. NC/$7. 18+ before 11 p.m. OPEN MIKE, Manhattan Pizza & Pub, 9 :30 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC.
"Not ju s t a bike shop ■ SNOWBOARD PACKAGESi 1 x-c SKI p a c k a g e s SNOW SHOES
KARAOKE W/MATT & BONNIE DRAKE, .
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Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC.
100 Main St
LADIES NIGHT KARAOKE, City Limits,
9 p.m. NC.
Hours: M-Thurs: 10-6, Fri: 10-7, Sat: 10-6, Sun 12-5
OPEN MIKE, Mad Mountain Tavern, 9
p.m. NC. 71
The. .
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January 12
Sugarbush a different mountain every Friday through April 6. skiing or boarding with your coupon. great prizes at the apres-ski party.
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IfeWALKERl
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SEVEN DAYS
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december 27, 2000 & january 3, 2001
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OPEN MIKE, Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m.
MICHAEL LESLIE (singer-songwriter),
LIVE MUSIC, Mad Mountain Tavern,
KARAOKE W/FRANK, Franny O’s, 9
NC.
Borders, 8 p.m. NC. BROOKS WILLIAMS (singer-songwriter), Burlington Coffeehouse at Rhombus, 8 p.m. $8. LIVE MUSIC, Sweetwaters, 9 p.m. NC.
9 p.m. $4.
p.m. NC.
LIVE MUSIC, Gallagher’s, 9 p.m. $3. DAWN DECKER (jazz), J.P. Morgan’s,
DJ DANCE PARTY, City Limits, 9 p.m.
7
LIVE MUSIC, Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m.
PETER MATTHEWS (folk), Cambridge Coffeehouse, Windridge Bakery, 7 p.m. Donations. MILLENNIUM POOL TOURNAMENT
(’70s-’90s DJ; prizes), Millennium Nightclub-Barre, 9 p.m. $3/$7. 18+ THE WAILERS (reggae), Pickle Barrel, 9 p.m. $13 .5 0 /1 5 .5 0. 18+
W OMYN'S DANCE W/RACHEL BISSEX, DJ EV, 135 Pearl, 6 p.m. $5, fol lowed by DJ LITTLE MARTIN, 10 p.m.
$4. LIVE MUSIC, Club Metronome, 9
p.m. $3. BLOOZOTOMY (jump blues), Red
THURSDAY OPEN MIKE, Jake’s, 6 :30 p.m. NC. ELLEN POWELL & TOM CLEARY (jazz),
Leunig's, 7:30 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE W/D. DAVIS, Cactus Cafe, 9 p.m. NC. DAN PARKS & THE BLAME (rock), Steer & Stein, 9 :30 p.m. NC. BLACK DIAMOND (classic rock), Nectar’s, 9 :30 p.m. NC. GREG IZOR’S BIG BLUES BLOWOUT,
Red Square, 9 :30 p.m. NC. LIVE MUSIC, Club Metronome, 9
p.m. $3. CRAZY HORSE (one-man band),
Manhattan Pizza & Pub, 10 p.m. NC. LADIES NIGHT W/DJ ROB JONES (Top 40), Millennium NightclubBurlington, 9 p.m. Women NC/$7; men $2/7. 18+ before 11 p.m. TOP HAT DJ, Rasputin’s, 10 p.m. NC. REGGAE NIGHT (DJ), J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. LIVE MUSIC, Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Backstage Pub, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE W/MATT & BONNIE DRAKE,
Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Otter CreekJavern, 9
p.m. NC. TNT KARAOKE, Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m.
NC. COLLEGE NIGHT (house/Top 40),
Millennium Nightc'jb-Barre, 9 p.m. Women NC/$7; men $2/7. 18+ FIGHTING GRAVITY (modern rock), Pickle Barrel, 9 p.m. $10-15.
c
!»«l|
FRIDAY PICTURE THIS (jazz), Upper Deck
Pub at the Windjammer, 5:30 p.m. NC. BOOTLESS & UNHORSED (Irish), Rasputin’s, 5 p.m. NC, followed by TOP HAT DJ, 9 p.m. NC.
Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. DJ NIGHT, Ri RS Irish Pub, 10:30 p.m. NC. LION’S DEN HIFI SOUND SYSTEM (reg gae DJs Yosef & Ras Jah I. Red), Manhattan Pizza & Pub, 10 p.m. NC. PERRY NUNN (acoustic guitar), Ruben James, 6 p.m., followed by TOP HAT DJ, 10 p.m. NC. GOOD QUESTION BAND (blues-rock), Nectar’s, 9 :30 p.m. NC. TEEN NITE (hip-hop party), Millennium Nightclub-Burlington, 6 p.m. $5, followed by FUSION W/DJS ROBBIE J. & FROSTEE (r&b/hiphop/Latin), 9 p.m. $3/10. 18+ before 11 p.m. KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. LIVE MUSIC, Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9 p.m. NC. COMEDY ZONE (stand-up), Radisson Hotel, 8 p.m. $8/6. 18+ ADAMS & EVE (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC. SILVERBACK (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. $2. KARAOKE W/VERN SHEPARD,
Backstage Pub, 9 p.m. NC. JOHN CASSEL (jazz piano), Tavern at the Inn at Essex, 7 p.m. NC. STUR CRAZIE (rock), Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. LIVE MUSIC, Village Cup, 8 p.m. NC. LIVE JAZZ, Diamond Jim ’s Grille, 7:30 p.m. NC. HIGH FALSE (rock covers), Monopole, 10 p.m. NC. ABAIR BROS, (rock), Franny O’s, 9 p.m. NC. STONE MOUNTAIN QUARTER (rock), City Limits, 9 p.m. NC. EXPOSURE (rock), Otter Creek Tavern, 9:30 p.m. NC. LIVE MUSIC, Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. $3. JOEY LEONE (acoustic blues), Charlie B's, 8 :30 p.m. NC. LIVE MUSIC, Matterhorn, 9 p.m. $35. FULL SWING (jazz), Mr. Pickwick’s, 8 p.m. NC. LIVE MUSIC, Mountain Roadhouse, 9 p.m. $3-5.
L E B R A T E
p.m. NC.
NC.
JOHN LACKARD BLUES BAND, Charlie
$3
O’s, 9 p.m. NC.
ANTHONY SANTOR DUO (jazz), Capitol
PC THE SPiNDOCTOR (house/Top 40),
Grounds, 7:30 p.m. NC.
Millennium Nightclub-Barre, 9 p.m. . $3/10. 18+ FIGHTING GRAVITY (modern rock), Pickle Barrel, 9 p.m. $10-15. ALICE PROJECT (orig. rock), Nightspot Outback, 9:30 pirn. $5-10.
SPINN CITY W/DJ ROBBIE J. (hip-
6 SATURDAY MICHAEL LESLIE, JAKE IDE (singer-
songwriters), Burlington Coffeehouse at Rhombus, 8 p.m. $6. . UNCLE JIM & THE TWINS (acoustic), Upper Deck Pub at the Windjammer, 8 p.m. NC. DJ LITTLE MARTIN, 135 Pearl, 9 p.m. $4. ABAIR BROS, (rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. RETRONOME (DJ; dance pop), Club Metronome, 10 p.m. $2. LIVE MUSIC, Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. DJS TIM DIAZ & RUGGER (hiphop/r&b), Ruben James, 10 p.m. NC. FLASHBACK (’80s DJ), .Rasputin’s, 10 p.m. NC. THE CLUBB MIXX W/DJS IRIE, FROSTEE & TOXIC (hip-hop/house), Millennium
Nightclub-Burlington, 9 p.m. $3/10. 1 8 + before 11 p.m. LIVE MUSIC, Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9 p.m. NC. COMEDY ZONE (stand-up), Radisson Hotel, 8 p.m. $8/6. 18+ GUY COLASACCO (singer-songwriter), Jake's, 6:30 p.m. NC. ADAMS & EVE (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC. LIVE JAZZ, Tuckaway’s, Sheraton Hotel, 9 p.m. NC. SILVERBACK (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. $2. HIT MEN (rock), Backstage Pub, 9 p.m. NC. STUR CRAZIE (rock), Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. EPIC LANDING (roots/folk rock), Village Cup, 8 p.m. NC. CONRAD SAMUELS BAND (country; line dancing), Cobbweb, 8 :30 p.m. $7/12. HIGH FALSE (rock covers), Monopole, 10 p.m. NC.
N E W
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hop/r&b), Millennium NightclubBarre, 9 p.m. $3/10. 18+ ROCKIN’ HORSE (rock), Gallagher’s, 9 p.m. $3. U.N.I. (reggae), Mad Mountain Tavern, 9 p.m. $5. TIN PAN ALLEY (acoustic),-Charlie B’s, 8:3 0 p.m. NC. LIVE MUSIC, Matterhorn, 9 p.m. $35. LIVE MUSIC, Rusty Nail, 9 p.m. $8. FUNKY MIRACLE (funk-groove), Blue Tooth, 9 :30 p.m. $2. FIGHTING GRAVITY (modern rock), Pickle Barrel, 9 p.m. $10-15, ALICE PROJECT (orig. rock), Nightspot Outback, 9:30 p.m. $5-10.
7 SUNDAY LIVE MUSIC, Sweetwaters, 11:30
a.m. NC. LAST NIGHT’S JOY (Irish), Ri
Rh Irish
jam), Sam’s Charlmont, 8 p.m. NC.
3
'
TUESDAY CHRIS PETERMAN, JOHN RIVERS & JOE CAPPS (jazz), Leunig’s, 7:30 p.m. NC. BIRTHDAY ZINGO W/ZENO (drag
bingo), 135 Pearl, 8 p.m. Donations. PUB QUIZ (trivia game w/prizes), Ri R i, 8 :4 5 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Burlington Coffeehouse, 8 p.m. Donations. JALAPENO BROS, (groove rock), Red Square, 9 :3 0 p.m. NC. SHADRACH (jam rock), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. NC. GIVENGROOVE (groove-rock), Nectar’s, 9 p.m. NC. TOP HAT DJ, Rasputin’s, 9 p.m. NC. 18+ BASHMENT (DJ John Demus; reggae/dancehall), Ruben James, 10 p.m. NC. OXONOISE (rock), J.P.’s Pub, 9:30 p.m. NC.
10 WEDNESDAY GUY COLASACCO (singer-songwriter),
Pub, 7 p.m. NC.
Jake’s, 6 :3 0 p.m. NC.
SUNDAY NIGHT M A SS (trance/house
RED THREAD W/RANDY CROSBY, JOHN CREECH & BILL PATTON (jazz),
DJ; bass & drums), Club Metronome, 10 p.m. $2. BLOOZOTOMY (jump blues), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. TOP HAT DJ (hip-hop), Rasputin’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. DAN PARKS & THE BLAME (rock), Champion’s Tavern, 9:30 p.m. NC.
Leunig’s, 7 :30 p.m. NC. KARAOKE KAPERS (host Bob
Bolyard), 135 Pearl, 9 p.m. NC. DAVE KELLER BLUES BAND, Red
Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC.
Square, 9:3 0 p.m. NC. LAST NIGHTS JOY (Irish), Ri Ra Irish Pub, 7 p.m. NC. THE WARRENS (rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC.
COLIN MCCAFFREY & PETE SUTHER LAND (acoustic), Capitol Grounds,
COSMIC DILEMMA, HUMAN CANOE REVUE (groove rock), Club
KARAOKE W/MATT & BONNIE DRAKE,
11
a.m. NC.
Metronome, 9 p.m. $2. DJS SPARKS, RHINO & HI ROLLA (hip-
LINE DANCING, 135 Pearl, 7:30 p.m. $3, followed by HAUS HAUS (DJ), 10
hop, reggae), Rasputin’s, 10 p.m. $6. 18+ COLLEGE NIGHT W/DJ ROBBIE J. (’70s & ’80s), Millennium NightclubBurlington, 9 p.m. NC/$7. 18+ before 11 p.m. OPEN MIKE, Manhattan Pizza & Pub, 9 :3 0 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC.
p.m. $5.
KARAOKE W/MATT & BONNIE DRAKE,
MONDAY GRIPPO (funky jazz), Red Square,
9:30 p.m. NC.
NERBAK BROS, (blues-jam), Nectar’s,
Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC.
9 p.m. NC.
LADIES NIGHT KARAOKE, City Limits,
OPEN MIKE, Rasputin’s, 9 p.m. NC. JERRY LAVENE (jazz guitar), Chow!
OPEN MIKE, Mad Mountain Tavern, 9
9 p.m. NC.
Bella, 6 p.m. NC.
p.m. NC.
MIGHTY BLUES WORKSHOP (blues
OPEN MIKE, Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. NC. MILLENNIUM POOL TOURNAMENT (’70s-
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SEVEN DAYS
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page 25
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past presents
Holiday gift giving hasn’t always been synonymous with Playstations, GameBoys and Super Poo-chi’s. As hard as it might be for young Americans to believe, there was a .time when a hand-knit pair of mittens or a stocking filled with candy, nuts and raisins would’ve made a child’s Christmas in Woodstock. Encourage your capitalist kids to spread a little old-fashioned cheer, and maybe some cow manure, on a dairy farm that dates hack to 1890 — the year Christmas became recognized as a hol iday across the country. Saturday & Sunday, December 3 0 & 31. Billings harm & Museum, Woodstock, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. $8. Info, 457-2355.
know your snow a,,,™,
web5itebyEartbloqkWebTedir
SEVEN DAYS - B u s i n e s s o f t h e Y e a r ...sez the Lake Champlain Regional
who’s seen the hit mountain disaster film Vertical Limit has seen snow on the go. Less known is the fact that avalanches are a potential hazard for skiers, snowboarders, climbers and snowshoers right in our own hack yard. A day-long clinic on “avalanche awareness” briefs backcountry types on hazard identification, stability evaluation, rescue strategies and other skin-saving mountaineering skills. So you can differentiate between a lovely hill and a living hell. . . . Thursday, December 28. Clearwater Sports, Waitsfield, 9 a.m. - 5 p.m. $65- Info, 496-2708.
peregrine a cre s w P«,Pi,. just seem destined for the work they do in life. Margaret Fowler, for example, has a job that’s for the birds. Literally. The National Wildlife Federation biologist is an authority on Vermont’s peregrine falcons, high-speed raptors that like to nest in cliffs overlooking wetlands. Fowler gives a lecture on the history, current status and mating trends of fast flyers as well as the state programs to monitor and manage their growing population^ Wednesday, January 3. Lake Champlain Basin Science Center, Btirlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 8641848.
m ission im probable y ,,, assigmnent should you choose to accept it: Witness firsthand a revolution in improvisational performance that has been hailed as “thrilling to behold” and the “most adventurous, intelligent premiere this year.” Your target: The Londonbased Improbable Theatre. The latest frOm the four-year-old Obie-winning troupe is an amalgam of music, puppetry, storytelling and animation exploring the impact of war on the human “Spirit.” This listing will self-destruct in 10 sec onds, so make a note of the data below: Friday and Saturday, January 5 & 6. Moore Theater, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N .H., 8 p.m. $20. Info, 603-646-2422.
"Rome & Jewels: A Hip-Hop Ballet" Rennie Harris Puremovement Saturday, January 20 at 8 pm "Twirling, acrobatic, silky-limbed per formers inflame the stage" (Chicago Tribune) West Side Story meets hip-hop! This urban take on Shakespeare’s classic Romeo & Juliet incorporates explosive breakdance, a hip-hop orchestra, and
Chamber of Commerce!
compelling rap and spoken word. Excerpts of Shakespeare’s text are also part of the mix. Pioneering dance artist Rennie Harris - last here with Jazz Tap/Hip-
Hop - creates exciting work rooted in the movement and voices of the streets.
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a funky feast
You know some thing called “Poetry in Motion” is going to be multi-disciplinary. But this smorgasboard of per formance in Plainfield is downright eclectic. Look for poetry slam champ Jessamine Levine, multi-percussionist Emily Lanxner and African dancer Shabba Kouassi, who’s come all the way from the Ivory Coast to cool her heels for Kwaanza. There’s eating after the beating. . . Monday, January 1. Plainfield Community Center, 5 p.m. $5 Info, 454-4662.
SHELBURNE
Show and benefit auction at the Sheraton is liter ally the cat’s meow for feline fans. Not only will the two-day competition feature 30 breeds from all around the country, there’ll be prizes for people as well — for the sportiest pajamas. But here’s a caveat: Kitty must come with a clean bill of health, and your bedtime wear must be “suitable for viewing by all ages.” Auction proceeds benefit the Franklin County Humane Society. Saturday and Sunday, January 6 & 7. Sheraton Hotel & Conference Center, Burlington, 10:30 a.m. - 4 p.m. $6. Info, 893-6270.
ballet • jazz • tap • boys jazz • nia exercise • dance/movement 177 SOUTH MAIN STREET, STOWE
winter/
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session
by rick kisonak
BATTERED WOMEN’S SUPPORT GROUP: Women Helping Battered Women facilitates a group in Burling ton, 6:30-8 p.m. Free. Info, 658-1996.
art • See exhibit openings in the art list ings.
a^es j through adults
Center, Church Street Marketplace, Burlington, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 860-7812. IN T R O D U C IN G :
december 21
Feels Like 5 Spice Weather...
■
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Best Restaurant in Town!” - The Boston Globe
W in n e r o f 8 “ Best o f V erm ont” Awards A sian feasts from T h ailan d , V ietn am , Indonesia and C h in a M an y Vegetarian Specialties an d A w ard -W inning D esserts L unch, D in n er and D im Sum
175 C hurch Street • Burlington • 864-4045 page 26
SEVEN DAYS
Seven Days recommends you confirm all calendar events, as times and dates may change after the paper is printed.
m u sic • See listings in “Sound Advice.”
d ram a ‘THE MUSIC MAN’: In this recently revived Broadway musical, con-man extraordinaire Harold Hill turns trouble in River City to his own advantage. Briggs Opera House, White River Junction, 2 & 7 p.m. $15-24. Info, 291-9009.
film ‘POLA X’: Guillaume Depardieu and Catherine Deneuve star in the cinemat ic story of an author whose peaceful existence is transformed by the appear ance of a mysterious woman. Cata mount Arts, St. Johnsbury, 7 p.m. $6. Info, 748-2600.
december 27, 2000 & january 3, 2001
january 10
• Also, see exhibit openings in the art istings. FIGURE DRAWING: The human figire motivates aspiring and accom plished artists in a weekly drawing ses sion on the second floor of the Firehouse Gallery, 135 Church St., Burlington, 6-8:30 p.m. $3-6. Info, S65-7165.
k id s LAKE CHAMPLAIN SCIENCE WORKSHOP: Kids bring a bendable branch to create a Native Americaninspired dreamcatcher. Lake Champlain Basin Science Center, Burlington, 12:30-2:30 p.m. $3. Info, 864-1848. WINTER TALES: Storyteller Tracy Chipman spins cold-weather yarns for listeners aged 5 and up. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10-11 a.m. Free. Register, 865-7216. STORY AND CRAFT HOUR: Firstthrough third-graders hear stories and get their hands on craft projects. Deborah Rawson Memorial Library,
Jericho, 1 p.m. Free. Register, 899-4962. VACATION DAY CAMP: Kids from kindergarten through high school indulge in creative crafts, books and sports. Leicester Central School, 8:30 11:30 a.m. Free. Info, 247-8825.
rs m u sic
• Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” SONGS AND CELEBRATION: All ages turn up to hear local folk faves Laurie Reeder and Lynne Robbins. Deborah Rawson Memorial Library, Jericho, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 899-4962. etc STORYTELLING: The storytelling SLEIGH RIDES: Belgian draft horses duo of Tim Jennings and Leanne haul you over snow-covered hills in thi Ponder tell traditional tales with spirit of Christmas past. Shelburne acoustic music. Gatehouse Lodge, Farms Welcome Center, 11 a.m. - 2 Lincoln Peak, Sugarbush Resort, p.m. $5. Info, 985-8442. Warren, 7:30 p.m. $5. Info, 583-6366. ‘CHRISTMAS AT BILLINGS FARM’: The period Vermont home dram a stead offers historically correct tours ‘THE MUSIC MAN’: See December a holiday spirit. See “to do” list, this 27, 7 p.m. issue. Billings Farm and Museum, SQAPFLAKES: The improv group fol Woodstock, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. $8. Inf( lows audience-directed plot twists in a bimonthly, soap opera-inspired perfor 457-2355. mance. Club Metronome, Burlington, HEALTH LECTURE: Learn howtc 7-8 p.m. $5. Info, 372-4606. get fit — fast — at a talk entitled H Hour to Better Health.” Chiropractii Works, Burlington, 5:20 p.m. Free POLA X’: See December 27. Info, 864-5000.
VACATION DAY CAMP: See December 27. LAKE CHAMPLAIN SCIENCE WORKSHOP: See December 27. Today bring a light-colored tee shirt to be printed with a “gyotaku,” or Japanese animal print.
sp o rt AVALANCHE AWARENESS WORKSHOP: Backcountry adventurers learn to identify hazards and evaluate the sta bility of snowpack. See “to do” list, this issue. Clearwater Sports, Route 100, Waitsfield, 9 a.m. —5 p.m. $65. Register, 496-2708.
etc SLEI.GH RIDES: See December 27. ‘CHRISTMAS AT BILLINGS FARM’: See December 27. FESTIVAL OF LIGHTS: Yule be amazed by the elaborate electrical dis plays at the Vermont State Fairgrounds, Rutland, 5-9 p.m. $5 per vehicle. Info, 775-6887. COMING-OUT SUPPORT GROUP: The community group R.U.1.2? sponsors a bi-weekly session for questioning adults. Peace & Justice
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m u sic • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” JOHN NICHOLS: The Vermont native returns from New York City to perform an acoustic/set at the Kept Writer Bookshop, St. Albans, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 527-6242.
dance LATINO DANCE PARTY: Deejay Hector “El Salsero” Cobeo spins discs at a spicy shakedown for Latin lovers. Higher Ground, Winooski. Lessons at 8 p.m. Dance at 9:30 p.m. $6. Info, 862-5082.
dram a
&
fk .
3
I
Hot-Stove Banquet & Auction
January 20th at the Clarion Hotel to benefit Vermont Children’s Aid Society Call 6 5 5 -4 2 0 0 f o r additional in fo rm a tio n or tickets
2001 SeasonTickets NowonSale!
‘THE MUSIC MAN’: See December 27, 7 p.m. REDWING PUPPET THEATER: The'troupe blends music, puppetry and physical comedy in an original show. Gatehouse Lodge, Lincoln Peak, Sugarbush Resort, Warren, 7:30 p.m. $5. Info, 583-6366. continued on page 3 0
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december 27, 2 00 0 & january 3, 2001
SEVEN
DAYS
page 27
fter
that
First N ight is indeed an “arts odyssey,” as it’s being billed on the brink o f 2001.
hype around I the millenni-
And the epic lineup evidences a plethora of performing artists in Vermont.
w um last year,
back to work” Lange. Two regulars will be missed: Rusty Dewees must be too
it’s easy to imagine First
busy stacking wood, and “Logger” calendars, to make an appearance; Abenaki
Night could be a little anti-
storyteller Wolfsong died unexpectedly this fall.
w
all
climactic on December 31. Or anti-climatic, if the
Ninety-two, to be exact — ranging from alt-rock bands to W illem “I gotta get
%
Now in its 18th year, Burlington’s First N ight has launched its share of local
weather gods choose to
talent. Artists get into it because it exposes them to new audiences. Since the
cooperate. But there’s a bright side to the post-par-
Q ueen C ity adopted the family-friendly festival model first established in Boston,
tydom syndrome affecting
in sober style. D on’t miss the new cocoa tent. A nd wear your woolies. . .
Rutland, Montpelier and St. Johnsbury have since signed on as cities celebrating
so many revelers this year. You don’t have to worry PHOTO: M AT TH EW T H 0 R SE N
about emergency evacua tion procedures, or vigi
shain reaction
A comedy about people with disabilities? Only an afflicted actom activist could pull it off. In “Still W aiting for that Special Bus,” the only thing that holds wheelchairbound Alan Shain back from a night out on a hot date is a handicapped bus system. But this play — from Shain’s Ottawa-based Smashing Stereotypes Productions — is less about public works than universal desires. “It’s first and foremost a look at dating. . . with the help, or lack thereof, o f ParaTranspo,” according to a reviewer at the Ottawa X Press. We can all relate to that. FlynnSpace, 5 & 9 p.m.
lantes raiding your fresh water supplies back at the ranch — just keeping your feet warm through a night of great, end-of-the-year entertainment.
m i n d g a m e s Last year he got his “subjects” to take up air instrum ents in an imaginary symphony. This year, says hypnotist Steve Taubm an, it’s gonna be a rock band — maybe along the lines o f Spinal Tap, if the former chiropractor decides to poke a little fun at his former day job. Recruits never regret signing up for “Hypnosis Extravaganza,” a marvel o f m ind m anipulation that is as respectful as it is entertaining. “You are going to have more fun doing this than anything you have ever done in your life,” Taubm an promises. Sounds convincing. . . Ira Allen Chapel, 3 & 6 p. m.
u n i c e in t h e w i l d e r n e s s You know you’ve made it big in Verm ont when you find yourself playing more than one town on the “First N ight” circuit. Between his debut Burlington shows at in the Key Bank lobby, Gregory Douglass is squeezing in a 7 o’clock appearance at First N ight M ontpelier — a return engagement. Expect to hear cuts from his new album and maybe “som ething in honor o f the New Year,” says the 19-year-old musician who writes as well as he warbles. Keep an ear out for this one. . . Key Bank Lobby, Burlington 4 & 10 p.m . Christ Church, Montpelier, 7 p. m.
page 28
SEVEN DAYS
t h e h o r r o r . . . Gore was never m eant to be a reference to our recent American electoral horror story, but Joe C itro acknowledges his latest work o f frightful fiction may have got ten some prom otional benefit from all the presidential publicity. In this case “Gore” describes a place — one of those curious bits of land in Vermont that cartographers chalk up to survey or error. And, perhaps, what a man in C itro’s book sees in the woods there. “It rattles him so m uch that it leads to his suicide,” says Citro, who special izes in real and imagined stories based on Verm ont’s unique and peculiar tales. Expect supernatural selections from the “ghostmaster general” in three lights-on readings with Vermont novelist, teacher and television com m entator Jim DeFilippi. First Congregational Church, 5 & 8 p.m. Fletcher Free Library Reading Room, 10 p.m.
december 27, 2000 - january 3, 2001
a l l t h a t j a a a Boys will be “boyz” when they are dancing for Ka a Amirault. In the footloose spirit o f Billy Elliot, the founder o f the youth-oriented Kidz dupe has given young males a chance to express themselves through dance. You can si;e t in an allguy num ber set to “Jailhouse Rock” in a show that samples everything from oadway to hip hop, swing dance and funky tap. Amirault is as versatile as her democrat definition o f “jazz.” She is pairing up with Patty Smith to fill the shoes o f Fred Astaire id Judy Garland in a dance num ber called “A Couple o f Swells,” from the movie Et4%Parade. Memorial Auditorium, 3 & 5 p.m. Flynn Theatre, 8:15p.m.
t h a r s h e b l o w s M ozart didn’t write a whole lot o f repertoire for flute and piano, but Karen Kevra and Paul Orgel make due, er, duo, in one o f the quieter concerts at First N ight. Along with a sampled sonata w ritten when the composer was 6, the program includes a couple o f arrangements by Vermont-based Louis Moyse originally w ritten for slightly different instrum enta tion. Kevra likes the fact that playing a couple o f First N ight concerts affords her two chances to get it right. “You get settled on the first one, and by the second, it’s great.” Play it again, Karen. . . First Baptist Church, 6 & 9 p. m. th E ^ g r a n d E ” i l l u s i o n w T a t s so funny about a midget M ounty clearing anklehigh jumps in slow m otion, his tiny legs flapping against the side o f a horse that looks more like a zebra? Its hard to explain, actually — even if you have seen El Gleno Grande in equestrian action. The West Virginia entertainer cracked up a full Flynn house on the occasion o f its gala re-opening in September with Vermont vaudevilleans Waldo and Woodhead. Between two reunion shows with them and a couple o f solo appearances, it looks like El Grande will be in the saddle all day. Ira Allen Chapel, 5 & 8 p.m . Flynn Theatre, 2 p.m. Memorial Auditorium, 7 p.m.
december 27, 2000 & january 3, 2001
SEVEN DAYS
page 29
J
j i\
continued from page 2 7
film
film
‘GOYA IN BORDEAUX’: See December 29, 7 & 9 p.m. SKI MOVIE NIGHT: Extreme skier John Egan offers running com mentary on his favorite ski flicks. Gatehouse Lodge, Lincoln Peak, Sugarbush Resort, Warren, 7:30 p.m. $5. Info, 583-6366.
‘GOYA IN BORDEAUX’:The Spanish painters end-of-life exile in France is the subject of “splashy and surreal” cinema at Catamount Arts, St. Johnsbury, 7 p.m. $6. Info, 748-2600.
art • See exhibit openings in the art listings.
art
sport
• See exhibit openings in the art listings.
FIREWORKS: A slopeside bash on Mount Mansfield features pyrotech nics and a torchlight parade. Stowe Mountain Resort, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 800-253-4754.
CREATIVE WRITING WORK SHOP: Carol Ann Wooster works with 8- to 15-year-olds on creative writing projects. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10 a.m. noon. Free. Info, 862-4325.
etc
sport CROSS-COUNTRY SKI: Nordic skiers explore private land near Moss Glen Falls in Stowe with the Montpelier section of the Green Mountain Club. Meet in the park ing lot of Montpelier High School, 10 a.m. Free. Register, 223-7035.
etc SLEIGH RIDES: See December 27. ‘CHRISTMAS AT BILLINGS FARM’: See December 27. FESTIVAL OF LIGHTS: See December 28. OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS: Addicted to eating? The issue of food abuse is on the table at Lawrence Library, Bristol, 9:30 a.m. Free. Info, 453-2368.
Saturday music • See listings in “Sound Advice.”
dance
31 sonda
CONTRA DANCE: Lausanne Allen calls the shots at this commu nity dance, with accompaniment from Brian Perkins, Rick Klein and Franklin Heyburn. Capital Grange Hall, Montpelier, 8 p.m. $7. Info, 744-6163.
art • See exhibit openings in the art listings.
film
sport
‘GOYA IN BORDEAUX’: See December 29.
FUN RUN: Five-K runners get set on their marks at the Gymnasium, Downtown Rutland, 3 p.m. $15. Info, 773-5333.
art • See exhibit openings in the art listings.
etc
kids
SLEIGH RIDES: See December 27. ‘CHRISTMAS AT BILLINGS FARM’: See December 27. FESTIVAL OF LIGHTS: See December 28. GLBTQ SUPPORT GROUP: Gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and questioning youth make new friends and get support. Outright Vermont, Burlington, 6:30-9 p.m. Free. Info, 800-452-2428. BATTERED WOMEN’S SUP PORT GROUP: Battered Women’s Services and Shelter facilitates a group in Barre, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 223-0855.
lowed by a potluck dinner. See “to do” list, this issue. Plainfield Community Center, above the Winooski Valley Co-op, 5 p.m. $5. Info, 454-4662.
‘THE MUSIC MAN’: See December 20, 2 p.m.
sport
SLEIGH RIDES: See December 27. ‘CHRISTMAS AT BILLINGS FARM’: See December 27. BURLINGTON FIRST NIGHT: A smorgasbord of music, magic, comedy, theater and dance enter tains revelers with a cause. See cen ter spread, this issue. Forty down town venues in Burlington, 2 p.m. midnight. $11. Info, 800-639-9252. MONTPELIER FIRST NIGHT: This alcohol-free event features more than 200 performers in venues around Montpelier, 3 p.m. - mid night. $10. Info, 229-9408. RUTLAND FIRST NIGHT: Enjoy bite-sized bits of puppet shows, theater, music, poetry, dance and storytelling. Headquarters at Asa Bloomer Building, 3 p.m. midnight. $10. Info, 773-2747. TORCHLIGHT PARADE: Torches and fireworks light the sky on the last night of Y2K. Lincoln Peak Base Area, Sugarbush Resort, Warren, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 583-6366.
ADIRONDACK HIKE: Step “res olutely” in snowshoes on a moderate six-mile hike up Hurricane Mountain with the Burlington sec tion of the Green Mountain Club. Free. Register, 893-1266.
etc SLEIGH RIDES: See December 27. PUBLIC MEDITATION: Take a step on the path to enlightenment in an environment that instructs beginners and supports practiced sit ters. Ratna Shri Tibetan Meditation Center, 12 Hillside Ave., Mont pelier, 6-7 p.m. Discussion, 7-8:30 p.m. Donations. Info, 223-5435.
2 tuuesday music • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” GREEN MOUNTAIN CHORUS: Members of the all-male barbershop chorus compare harmonious notes at South Burlington High School, 7-9:30 p.m. Free. Info, 860-6465.
morsday
new years eve
drama
• See listings in “Sound Advice.”
drama
‘GOYA IN BORDEAUX’: See December 29.
music
music
‘THE MUSIC MAN’: See December 27.
film
new year’s day • See listings in “Sound Advice.” ‘POETRY IN MOTION’: Kick off the new year with a blend of music, spoken word and movement, fol
art • See exhibit openings in the art listings. . listin
words
BURLINGTON WRITERS GROUP: Bring pencil, paper and the will to be inspired to this writerly gathering at the Daily Planet, Burlington, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 658-6063.
kids ‘MUSIC WITH ROBERT AND GIGI’: Kids sing songs with Robert Resnik and his fiddle-playing friend Gigi Weisman. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11-11:30 a.m. Free. Register, 865-7216.
etc SLEIGH RIDES: See December 27. RUNES WORKSHOP: Learn how to create and use ancient Norse tal ismans. Unitarian Church, Montpelier, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 229-0112. ‘COMPASSIONATE FRIENDS’: People mourning the loss of chil dren, grandchildren or siblings get support at the Good Shepherd Lutheran Church, Rutland, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 482-5319. BASIC MEDITATION: Cherokee and Tibetan Buddhist practices help renew the body and spirit. Ratna Shri Tibetan Meditation Center, 12 Hillside Ave., Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 223-5435.
W ednesday music • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” PETER MATTHEWS: The classi cal guitarist pulls strings at the Cambridge Coffeehouse. Windridge Bakery, Jeffersonville, 7-9 p.m. Donations. Info, 644-5721.
film GOYA IN BORDEAUX’: See December 29. ‘FAME’: This musical film follows eight teenagers through the paces at
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eight teenagers through the paces at the prestigious High School of the Performing Arts. Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 6:45 & 9:30 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.
thursday music • See listings in “Sound Advice.”
drama
art
ONE-ACT PLAY AUDITIONS: The Essex Community Players are seeking actors for a February run of three short plays: The Pushcart Peddlers, Finding the Sun and Still Life. Memorial Auditorium, Essex Center, 7-10 p.m. Free. Info, 859-9295.
• Also, see exhibit openings in the art listings. FIGURE DRAWING: See December 27.
words CRIME NOVEL BOOK DISCUS SION: A roundtable of readers takes a closer look at The Talented Mr. Ripley, by Patricia Highsmith. South Burlington Community Library, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 652-7080.
film ‘GOYA IN BORDEAUX’: See December 29. ‘BELLE DE JOUR’: Luis Bunuel directs Catherine Deneuve as a bored Parisian housewife who takes up prostitution to live out her fan tasies. Loew Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 7 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.
kids STORY AND CRAFT TIME: Preschoolers aged 3 to 6 dabble in designs and drama. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10-10:45 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. HOMESCHOOLERS STORY TIME: Kids older than 4 meet up with other homeschoaled peers. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 1:30-2:30 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7216.
art • See exhibit openings in the art listings.
words
etc HEALTH LECTURE: See December 27. BATTERED WOMEN’S SUP PORT GROUP: See December 27. PEREGRINE FALCON TALK: A wildlife biologist looks at the cur rent and historic population trends of Vermont’s protected predator. See “to do” list, this issue. Lake Cham plain Basin Science Center, Burling ton, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 864-1848. REIKI CLINIC: Practitioners of all levels learn about the hands-on heal ing method. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 864-9988.
POETRY SLAM: Organizers describe this word wrangle as “a cross between a boxing match and a tent revival.” Tonight features four time National Poetry Slam winner Patricia Smith. Rhombus Gallery, 186 College St., Burlington, 8 p.m. $5. Info, 862-9198. POETRY WORKSHOP: Local poet David Weinstock shares writ ing tips with aspiring authors at the Ilsley Public Library, Middlebury, 1 p.m. Free. Info, 388-7523.
etc NATURE CENTER VOLUN TEER TRAINING: Folks interest ed in guiding kids to “winter discov eries” meet at the Green Mountain Audubon Society, Huntington, 9
a.m. - noon. Free. Register, 434-3068. WOMEN HELPING BAT TERED WOMEN: Learn about domestic abuse and services avail able at an open information session. UVM Women’s Center, Burlington, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 658-3131.
5
FEATURE: In Almost Famous, Cameron Crowe tells the cinematic tale of a teenage Rolling Stone writer. Spike Lee’s latest, The Original Kings o f Comedy, captures the “raw, bust-agut humor” of four major black comedians. Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 6:45 & 9:30 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.
art
friday
Vermont Conservatory of Ballet. St. Michael’s College Chapel, Colchester, 6:30 p.m. Donations. Info, 878-2584. * CELESTIAL SIRENS: The Early Music Vermont splinter group per forms a program titled “Songs, Chants and Carols,” including music by Dufay, Cowper and Monteverdi. St. Mary’s Episcopal Church, Northfield, 8 p.m. Donations. Info, 453-3016.
• See exhibit openings in the art listings.
music • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” MICHAEL LESLIE: The part-time New York singer-songwriter strums for post-Christmas shoppers at Borders, Church Street Marketplace, Burlington, 5-7 p.m. Free. Info, 865-2711. JOSH BROOKS: The country-folk singer-songwriter performs originals at the Kept Writer Bookshop, St. Albans, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 527-6242. BORROMEO STRING QUAR TET: Known for its poise and pas sion, the young ensemble puts on a program that includes a new work by Steven Mackey. Trinity Episcopal Church, Rutland, 8 p.m. $10. Info, 775-5413. '
drama ESSEX COMMUNITY PLAYERS AUDITIONS: See January 4. IMPROBABLE THEATRE: The London-based improv troupe shows its “Spirit” in a multi-media work about three brothers. See “to do” list, this issue. Moore Theatre, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 8 p.m. $20. Info, 603-646-2422.
film ‘BEST IN SHOW’: This canine comedy focuses on the other-world ly arena of dog shows. Catamount Arts, St. Johnsbury, 7 p.m. $6. Info, 748-2600. ‘NATURE OF FAME’ DOUBLE
ZOO 1
kids ‘MUSIC W ITH ROBERT AND GIGI’: See January 2.
etc GRAND CANYON TALK Explore the layers of history revealed by the giant geological formation. VINS North Branch Nature Center, Montpelier, 7-8:30 p.m. Free. Info, 229-6206. GLBTQ SUPPORT GROUP: Gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and questioning youth make new friends and get support. Outright Vermont, Burlington, 6:30-9 p.m. , Free. Info, 800-452-2428. BATTERED WOMEN’S SUP PORT GROUP: Battered Women’s Services and Shelter facilitates a group in Barre, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 223-0855.
6 Saturday music • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” BORROMEO STRING QUAR TET: See January 5, Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 8 p.m. $22. Info, 603-646-2422. TWELFTH NIGHT CELEBRA TION: The Essex Children’s Choir sings along with guests “Big Joe” Burrell, Wayne Hobbs and the
dance CONTRA DANCE: Peter Amidon calls the moves at this community dance, with accompaniment by Sarah Blair and Jeremiah McLane. Capital Grange Hall, Montpelier, 8 p.m. $7. Info, 744-6163. ‘DANCES OF UNIVERSAL PEACE’: Put spiritual practice in motion by participating in dances and songs that celebrate community. Vermont Yoga Studio, Chace Mill, Burlington, 7-9 p.m. $5-7. Info, 482-2836.
drama ‘IMPROBABLE THEATRE’: See January 5.
film ‘BEST IN SHOW’: See January 5, 7 & 9 p.m. ‘DANCER IN THE DARK’: Bjork stars as a blind factory worker trying to raise her sickly son in this film from Lars Breaking the Waves von Trier. Loew Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 7 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.
art • See exhibit openings in the art listings.
kids CREATIVE WRITING WORK SHOP: See December 30.
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Mountain Club leads a Long Trail trek to a high point. 8:30 a.m. Free. Register, 658-0912. CROSS-COUNTRY SKI AND SNOWSHOE: A chili potluck awaits at the end of a five-mile trek to the Beaver Meadow Lodge. Meet in the parking lot of Montpelier High School, 8:30 a.m. Free. Register, 229-3376.
etc CAT SHOW: Cat fanciers flock to this feline festival featuring a “parade of breeds,” competitions, an auction and vendors. See “to do” list, this issue. Sheraton Conference Center, S. Burlington, 10:30 a.m. 4:30 p.m. $6. Info, 893-6270. TRACKING OUTING: Check out bobcat habitat with members of the Lewis Creek Association in the HinesburgTown Forest, 8 a.m. - 3 p.m. $10. Register, 482-2405. INTRO SESSION: Consider edu cational opportunities in paralegal studies and mediation work, and hear about recent changes at Woodbury College, Montpelier, 9 a.m. —1:30 p.m. Free. Info, 800639-6039. OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS: Addicted to eating? The issue of food abuse is on the table at Lawrence Library, Bristol, 9:30 a.m. Free. Info, 453-2368.
Renee Russo and Danny DeVito star in this comedy in which show biz and syndicated crime collide. Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 6:45 & 9:15 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.
art • See exhibit openings in the art listings.
words OPEN MIKE: Poets and fiction writers have their say at the Kept Writer Bookshop, St. Albans, 2 p.m. Free. Info, 527-6242.
sport HAZEN’S NOTCH SKI: Weather willing, the Burlington section of the Green Mountain Club leads a 10-mile ski excursion from the cross-country ski center. Montgomery Center, 8:30 a.m. Free. Register, 899-3067.
etc CAT SHOW: See January 6.
8 monday music • See listings in “Sound Advice.”
film
enjoy tall tales. Pierson Library, Shelburne, 10:30-11:30 a.m. Free. Info, 985-5124.
etc LEGISLATIVE BREAKFAST: Lawmakers listen to the public at this hot breakfast sponsored by the Lake Champlain Regional Chamber of Commerce. Sheraton Hotel, S. Burlington, 7:15-9 a.m. $14. Info, 863-3489, ext. 210. AMNESTY INTERNATIONAL MEETING: Get informed and organized to fight human rights abuses. Unitarian Universalist Society, Burlington, 5:30-6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 862-1358. ‘MAGIC CARPET’ LUN CHEON: Listeners get a lunchtime lift to learn about Alaska’s Pribilof Islands. Montshire Museum, Norwich, 11 a.m. $12. Register, 603-643-5713. NETWORKING GROUP: Employee hopefuls get job leads, connections, skills and support. Career Resource Center, Vermont Department of Employment & Training, Burlington, 1 p.m. Free. Info, 652-0322. PUBLIC MEDITATION: Take a step on the path to enlightenment in an environment that instructs beginners and supports practiced sitters. Ratna Shri Tibetan Meditation Center, 12 Hillside Ave., Montpelier, 6-7 p.m. Discussion, 7-8:30 p.m. Donations. Info, 223-5435.
‘BEST IN SHOW5: See January 5.
Sunday music • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” CELESTIAL SIRENS: See December 29, Lincoln United Church, 3 p.m.
film ‘BEST IN SHOW’: See January 5, 1:30 & 7 p.m. ‘GET SHORTY’: John Travolta,
art • See exhibit openings in the art listings.
tuesday music
kids SCIENCE HOUR: Pint-sized preschoolers and their parents enjoy science stories, live animals and activities. Lake Champlain Science Center, Burlington, 10 a.m. - noon. $3. Info, 864-1848. STORY TIME: Little listeners
• Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” GREEN MOUNTAIN CHORUS: See January 2.
art • See exhibit openings in the art listings.
words BURLINGTON WRITERS GROUP: Bring pencil, paper and the will to be inspired to this writerly gathering at the Daily Planet, Burlington, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 658-6063.
kids ‘MUSIC WITH ROBERT AND GIGI’: See January 2. SONG AND STORYTIME: Threes are company at this singing read-along for babies and toddlers. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10-10:30 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216.
sport FULL MOON SNOWSHOE: Join a flashlight-led tour of Hubbard Park with the Montpelier section of the Green Mountain Club. Meet in the parking lot of Montpelier High School, 5:30 a.m. Free. Register, 223-7035.
etc ‘ESBAT’ FULL MOON RITUAL: Pagans circle up on the year’s first full moon. Unitarian Church, Montpelier, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 476-4125. FATHERS AND CHILDREN GROUP: Dads and kids spend some quality time together during a weekly meeting at the Wheeler Community School, Burlington, 57 p.m. Free. Info, 860-4420. BASIC MEDITATION: Cherokee and Tibetan Buddhist practices help renew the body and spirit. Ratna Shri Tibetan Meditation Center, 12 Hillside Ave., Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 223-5435.
film ‘BEST IN SHOW”: See January 5.
Continued on page 3 4
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lasses aikido AIKIDO OF CHAMPLAIN VAL LEY: Adults, Monday through Friday, 5:45-6:45 p.m. and 7-8:15 p.m. Thursdays, noon - 1 p.m. Saturdays, 9-11:45 a.m. Children, Tuesdays & Thursdays, 4-5 p.m. Aikido of Champlain Valley, 17 E. Allen St., Winooski. $55/month, $120/three months, intro specials. Info, 654-6999 or www.aikidovt.org. Study this graceful, flowing martial art to develop flexibility, confidence and self-defense skills. AIKIDO OF VERMONT: Ongoing classes Monday through Friday, 6-7 p.m. and 7-8 p.m. Saturday, 9-10:30 a.m. Sunday, 10-11:30 a.m. Above Onion River Co-op, 274 N. Winooski Ave., Burlington. Info, 862-9785. Practice the art o f Aikido in a safe and supportive environment:
architecture HISTORIC ARCHITECTURE IN VERMONT: Wednesdays, January 10 &t 17, 7-9 p.m. Community College of Vermont, Burlington. $40. Register, 865-4422. Through slides and videos, learn to recognize the most common historic architectural styles in Vermont.
art DRAWING FOR BEGINNERS: Saturdays, January 13 and 20, 1-5 p.m. Community College of Vermont, Burlington. $70, includes materials. Register, 865-4422. Heighten your awareness of the visual world by exploring the elements of drawing.
bartending PROFESSIONAL BARTENDING TRAINING: Day, evening and weekend courses. Various locations. Info, 888-854-4448 or bartendingschool.com. Get certified to make a mean martini, margarita, manhattan or mai tai.
business ‘GETTING SERIOUS’: January 11, 18, 24 and February 1. Women’s Small Business Program, Burlington. $115, grants available. Info, 8467160. Explore the possibilities and real ities of business ownership, assess your skills and interests and develop a busi ness idea. ‘START UP’: February through May. Women’s Small Business Program, Burlington. $1250, grants available. Info, 846-7160. Learn valuable skills as you write a business plan. ‘ADVENTURES IN MARKET ING’: February 6, 13, 20 and 27. Women’s Small Business Program, Brattleboro. $150, grants available. Info, 846-7160. Determine how to find your customer, assess your competi tion and market your business. ‘MANAGEMENT 101’: Three Tuesdays, February 20, 27 and March 6, 6-8 p.m. Women’s Small Business Program, Burlington. $100, grants available. Get briefed on the basics of human-resource management.
computers INTRODUCTION TO WIN DOWS 95, 98 OR 2000: Monday, January 8, 1-4 p.m. Community College of Vermont, Burlington. $50. Register, 865-4422. Learn how to cus tomize your computer and take advan tage of its many features. KEYBOARD SURVIVAL SKILLS: Monday and Wednesday, January 8, 10, 15, & 17, 6-8 p.m. Community College of Vermont, Burlington. $50. Register, 865-4422. Here's a quick and practical introduction to basic key
boarding skills for those who want to type or word-process using more than two fingers. FILE MANAGEMENT: Wednesday, January 10, 1-4 p.m. Community College of Vermont, Burlington. $50. Register, 865-4422. Learn how to organize, move, copy and save files, manage disk space, and usefile exten sions. MEET THE INTERNET: Monday, January 15, 1-4 p.m. Community College of Vermont, Burlington. $50. Register, 865-4422. Learn to use the World Wide Web, send e-mail, surf, explore your interests, shop or make travel arrangements online. BASIC COMPUTER APPLICA TIONS: Wednesday, January 17, 1-4 p.m. Community College of Vermont, Burlington. $50. Register, 865-4422. Get an introduction to Microsoft Office software, and the ins and outs of the most popular computer applications.
craft PAINTING CERAMICS: Ongoing classes. Blue Plate Ceramic Cafe, 119 College St., Burlington. Free. Info, 652-0102. Learn the fundamentals of painting ceramics. CLAY CLASSES: Ongoing classes. Frog Hollow State Craft Center, Burlington, Middlebury and Manchester. Info, 860-7474, 3883177 o r www.froghollow.org. Work with clay in various classes offered throughout the year. POTTERY & SCULPTURE: For kids and adults, beginners and expe rienced; group classes, private lessons, studio rental. Days, evenings, week ends. Vermont Clay Studio, 2802 Route 100, Waterbury Center. Register, 224-1126 ext. 41. Experience the pleasures and challenges of working with clay, whether you’ve had a lot, just a little or no pottery experience.
dance SWING DANCE LESSONS: Classes start Sunday, January 14. $40/person for 6-week session. Info, 862-9033. www.HollywoodStyleSwing.com. Get a feel for Hollywood-style swing so you can shine on the dance floor. YMCA DANCE: Ongoing classes for adults, teens and children. YMCA, College St., Burlington. Info, 8629622. Classes are offered in Latin, swing and youth ballet.
8S4.5884 training of traditional Japanese Shotokan karate.
language ITALIAN: Group and individual instruction, beginner to advanced, all ages. Middlebury area. Info, 5452676. Immerse yourselfin Italian to get readyfor a trip abroad, or to better enjoy the country’s music, art and cui sine. ESL: Ongoing small group classes, beginners and intermediates. Vermont Adult Learning, Sloan Hall, Fort Ethan Allen, Colchester. Free. Info, 654-8677. Improve your listen ing, speaking, reading and writing skills in English as a second language.
massage ADVANCED MASSAGE WORK SHOP: Three Monday mornings, starting January 8, downtown Burlington. Fee and course info, 8652444. Judi Blakely teaches experienced, professional massage therapists advanced deep-tissue techniques for the most challenging clients.
meditation ZEN MEDITATION: Mondays, 4:45-5:45 p.m. Thursdays, 5:30-6:30 p.m. Burlington. Free. Info, 6586466. Meditate with a sitting group associated with the Zen Affiliate of Vermont. MEDITATION: Ongoing Tuesdays, 7-8:30 p.m. Green Mt. Learning Center, Spirit Dancer Books, 125 S. Winooski Ave., Burlington. Donations. Info, 660-8060. Take part in a weekly meditation and discussion , group. ‘THE WAY OF THE SUFI’: Tuesdays, 7:30-9 p.m. S. Burlington. Free. Info, 658-2447. This Sufi-style meditation incorporates breath, sound and movement. MEDITATION: Sundays, 9 a.m. noon. Burlington Shambhala Center, 187 S. Winooski Ave. Free. Info, 658-6795. Instructors teach non-sec tarian and Tibetan Buddhist medita tions. GUIDED MEDITATION: Sundays, 10:30 a.m. The Shelburne Athletic Club, Shelburne Commons. Free. Info, 985-2229. Practice guided medi tation for relaxation and focus. MINDFULNESS MEDITATION’: Ongoing Sundays, 5-6 p.m. 35 King St., Burlington. Free. Info, 864-7715. Gain greater awareness, breath by breath.
health
music
ACCUPRESSURE/SHIATSU LEVEL 1: Starting in January. Ten Fridays, 9 a.m.- 2 p.m. or four week end intensives, Saturday, 9 a.m.- 5 p.m., Sunday, 1-5:30 p.m. Vermont School of Asian Body Therapy, Essex Junction. Register, 651-7765. Learn Chinese medical theory and Asian bodywork to enhance health and pro mote recovery.
TAIKO: Thursdays in Montpelier, 4 p.m. for kids and 5 p.m. for adults. Capital City Grange. Mondays in Burlington, 3:30 p.m. for kids, adults 5:30. 208 Flynn Ave. Info, 6580658. Experience the power o/taikostyle drumming. DJEMBE: Ongoing Wednesdays, 5:30 p.m. Burlington. $12. Info, 658-0658. Stuart Baton teaches djembe drumming; instruments available.
karate TRADITIONAL JAPANESE KARATE: Ongoing Wednesdays and Fridays, 6-7:30 p.m. 208 Flynn Ave., Burlington. Free. Info, 951-9047 or Kumite46@excite.com. Benefit from the physical, 'mental and spiritual
psychology DEALING WITH DEPRESSION: Eight Wednesdays starting January 3, 7-9 p.m. 119 S. Winooski Ave., Burlington, $15 per class. Info, 6585888. Develop creativity, community and the “courage to change”while you “blow your winter blues. ” ADOLESCENTS — SECRETS ON HOW TO RELATE TO YOUR TEENAGER: Saturday, January 13, 9 a.m.-3 p.m. Community College of Vermont, Burlington. $50. Register, 865-4422. Learn ways to alleviate stress in parent-teen relationships while developing skills to resolve difficult fam ily situations.
self-defense BASIC SELF-DEFENSE: Saturdays, January 6, 13, & 20, 9-11 a.m. All classes at Community College of Vermont, Burlington. $50. Register, 865-4422. Learn skills and strategies to increase personal safety, avoid con flict and defend yourselffrom assault. BRAZILIAN JIU-JITSU AND CARDIOBOXING: Ongoing classes for men, women and children, Monday through Saturday. Vermont Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Academy, 4 Howard St., Burlington. Info, 6604072. Escapefear with an integrated self-defense system based on technique, not size, strength or speed.
spirit HEALING CIRCLE: Tuesdays, January 9 and February 13, 7:15-9 p.m. Body Mind Connection, 119 S. Winooski Ave., Burlington. $8. Info, 658-5888. Guided visualization, Reiki, crystals and music promote heal ing in small groups. FIRST NIGHT AURA PHOTOG RAPHY & VIDEO: Sunday, Dec. 31,12 noon-6 p.m. Spirit Dancer Books, 125 S. Winooski Ave., Burlington. $25. Come and see what your aura looks like on First Night. Photos include a five-page analysis and personal reading by Linda Wiggins. Aura videos are $30 and include nar ration.
sport SPINNING: Ongoing daily classes. Chain Reaction, One Lawson Lane, Burlington. First ride free. Info, 6573228. Pedal your way to fitness in a diverse, non-competitive environment. FLY TYING: Six-week course, Saturdays or Sundays, starting January 13-14. Schirmer’s Fly Shop, 34 Mills Ave., So. Burlington. Info, 863-6105. For beginners and others who might like a refresher. Experience the satisfaction of catching sport fish on flies you have tied.
substance abuse
juggling JUGGLING CLUB: Ongoing Mondays, 5-7 p.m. Memorial Auditorium, Burlington. Ongoing Tuesdays, 5-8 p.m. Racquetball Courts, Patrick Gym, University of Vermont, Burlington. Donations. Info, 658-5512. Beginner-to-expert jugglers and unicyclists convene.
12 noon. Community College of Vermont, Burlington. $30, Register, 865-4422. Become a more exciting speaker by learning how to pick, pre pare and incorporate stories into your speeches.
photography INSTRUCTION: Classes, work shops and private instruction. Info, 372-3104. Take classes in creative and technical camera and darkroom skills while teaming to “see”with a photo graphic eye. PHOTOGRAPHY: Ongoing class. Jon’s Darkroom, Essex Junction. Info, 879-4485. Beginning photographers or those who need a refresher course, take classes in shooting or black-and-white processing.
public speaking SPEAK TO BE HEARD — TELL A STORY: Saturday, Jan 13, 9 a.m.-
SUBSTANCE ABUSE TREAT MENT: Weekend program. Possibilities Counseling Center, Essex Jet. Info, 878-6378. Working profes sionals get non-residential, affordable treatment in a private setting. '
support groups OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS: Daily meetings in various locations. Free. Info, 863-2655. Overeaters get support in addressing their problem. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS: Daily meetings in various locations. Free. Info, 860-8382. Want to over come a drinking problem? Take the first
december 2 7 r 2 0 0 0 & January 3* 2001
step — of 12 — andjoin a group in your area. AL-ANON: Ongoing Wednesdays, 8 p.m. First Congregational Church, N. Winooski Ave., Burlington. Free. Info, 655-6512. Do you have a friend or relative with an alcoholprobleml Alcoholics Anonymous can help. NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS: Ongoing daily groups. Various loca tions in Burlington, S. Burlington and Plattsburgh. Free. Info, 8624516. I f you’re ready to stop using drugs, this group of recovering addicts can offer inspiration. PARTNERS AND FRIENDS OF SURVIVORS: Group forming. Info, 655-4907. Partners and friends of childhood abuse survivors share strug gles and successes with peers. PSYCHIATRIC SUPPORT GROUP: Thursdays, 7 p.m. Various Burlington locations. Free. Info, 2881006. Get peer support for depression, anxiety or other psychiatric illness. SEX AND LOVE ADDICTS ANONYMOUS: Sundays, 7 p.m. Free. Info, write to P.O. Box 5843, Burlington, 05402. Get help through this weekly 12-step program. ‘THE HEALING JOURNEY’: A free, confidential 10-week support group for women who have survived sexual violence, sponsored by Women Helping Battered Women. Begins in January. Info, 863-1236. The Healing Journey welcomes all survivors regard less of when the assault took place.
women ‘CREATING JOY AND ABUN DANCE’: January 18, 24, February 1,8, 15 and 22. Women’s Small Business Program, Trinity College, Burlington. $115, grants available. Info, 846-7160. Learn how to elimi nate barriers and achieve your goals. VOLUNTEER TRAINING: Two full Saturdays, Jan. 13 & 20 and two weekday evenings, Jan. 17 & 23. Women Helping Battered Women, Burlington. Info, 6583131. Volunteers get trained to assist on the hotline, in the shelter, working with children or in court.
woodworking CREATIVE FURNITURE MAK ING: Tuesdays and Thursdays, January 9-25, 6:30-9:30 p.m. Yestermorrow School, Warren. $400. Info, 888-496-5541. Learn to repro duce fine furniture without detailed drawings in a hands-on class. v '
yoga ‘BECOMING PEACE YOGA’: Ongoing classes. Essex Jet. Info, 8785299. Release chronic tension, gain self-awareness and honor your inner wisdom through Kripalu-style yoga study. BEECHER HILL YOGA: Ongoing daytime & evening classes for all lev els. Info, 482-3191 or hillyoga@sover.net. Get private or group instruction in prenatal yoga, integrative yoga therapy or gentle yoga for recovery and rehabilitation. YOGA VERMONT: Daily classes, noon, *5:30 and 7:30 p.m. Saturday and Sunday, 9:30 a.m. Chace Mill, Burlington. Info, 660-9718 or yogavermont.com. Ashtanga-style “power”yoga classes offer sweaty fun for all levels of experience. ®
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C la ss Listings: $10/w eek or $30/four weeks. M ail info and pay ment to: Classes, Seven Days, PO Box 1164, Burlington, VT 0 54 0 2. All subm issions due in writing on Thursday before publication. SEVEN D A Y S e d its for s p a c e and style.
SEVEN DAYS
page 33
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Continued from page
32
k id s STORY TIME: See January 8. STORY AND CRAFT TIME: See January 3.
10
Wednesday wea music
HEALTH LECTURE: See December 27. BATTERED WOMEN’S SUP PORT GROUP: See December 27. WOMEN HELPING BAT TERED WOMEN: See January 4. BREAST CARE DISCUSSION: “Ladies First” sponsors an informa tive question and answer session with health experts. Borders, Church Street Marketplace, Burlington, noon. Free. Info, 865-2711. (?)
• See listings in “Sound Advice.
dance
Fr id a y ; D e c e m b e r 29t h a t 9 p m SATURDAY# DECEMBER IOTH 8 PM * 10 PM
HIP-HOP WORKSHOP: Members of the Rennie Harris Puremovement dance company show how to move to the groove. Collis Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 3:30-5 p.m. $1. Info, 603-646-2010.
THE ZONE') FUNNIEST! ICKETS ONLY
<ALL 658-6500 FOR RESERVATIONS!
F o r the f i n e s t a u th e n tic I tla ia n
‘BEST IN SHOW: See January 5. ‘NATURE OF FAME’ DOUBLE FEATURE: In BeingJohn Malkovitch, John Cusack and Cameron Diaz star as trespassers in the mind of the edgy actor. The bio-pic Man on the Moon centers on the obsessive character of come dian Andy Kaufman. Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 6:45 & 8:55 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.
Calendar
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Christian. Classes are compiled by George Thabault. All subm issions are due in writing on the Thursday before publication. SEVEN DAYS edits for space and style. Send to:
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Gift Certificates available
Free Parking Private Parties up to 100 people We cook without MSG! — We use Vegetable Oil
Vermont’s Finest Chinese Restaurant 1 9 9 3 -2 0 0 0 ,
,
*
Bring your old equipment to SKIRACK! DOWNHILL SKIS • SNOWBOARDS XCSKIS * TELEMARK SKIS
• Tangerine Beef • Tangerine Chicken • Sesame Shrimp • Crispy Wing with Ginger and Scallions • Singapore Noodle
.
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Human S e rv ice s?
We’ll help you price it and we’ll put it on sale on Saturday, January 6. When your items sell, you get 100% of the proceeds as a credit towards _____ new equipment, or 80% as cash. .I l l
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OUR GRAND RE-OPENING CELEBRATION CONTINUES!
Please ask abou t our great hmcheon specials
your dreams...
HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
BIRTH CONTROL STUDY
participants w anted
9:30pm
Youth Leadership Health Outreach Human Services Advocacy Community Development Addictions Prevention
The Verm ont W om en's H ealth Center,
Call us about our first-in-the-nation
a program o f M aim ed Parenthood o f
Prevention & Com m unity Development Program
Horth^jnn H ew England providing com prehensive gynecology and obstetrical <are fo r o v e r 25j|e a r s , is seeking wom en ages 18-^ to ^ p a itic ip o te J n a b irth control study com paring fiv e d iffe re n t types o f speim icide. Participants will be <o
IM PORTANT;
Used equipment accepted 10:00 am January 2 ’till 8 .0 0 pm January 5
LOTS OF NEW EQ U IP M E N T ON SALE , TO O ! FOR M O R E IN FO , CALL 6 5 8 - 3 3 1 3
79 W. Canal St., Winooski 655-7474 / 655-7475 Mon.>*ThuFS« ll:30-9:30pm; F ri Sc S a t ll;30-lO:3Opm;
M-Th 10-7; Fr KHJ; Sat 9-6; Sun 11-5. 85 Main Street 658-3313 • 1-800-882-4530
Associate’s Degree Professional Certificate New! Bachelor’s Degree
FREE! Intro Sessions
1 -8 0 0 -6 3 9 -6 0 3 9
LILYD A LE The Taste of the Holidays
Christmas Stollen.Yule Logs, Fresh Baked Pecan, Apple & Cherry Pies Plus our Standard Assortment of Great Breads and Pastries I I 62 W I L L I S T O N R O A D • 8 6 3 - 3 0 0 0
H
H you are interested,
802.863.1386 lor more information Montpelier,
*
H ilt.
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Step into
M a le -O r d e r B u s in e s s
the 21st century...
W E CARRY T H E C O M PLET E LIN ES OF Biolage • KM S • Rusk • Redken Graham W e b b • Back to Basics
B y C h r is M c D o n a l d
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know its after Christmas, but let’s face it. None of the stuff you ordered over the Web made it to your sweetie in time, in no small part because half the companies you ordered from will be out of business by the time you read this, their stock worthless and their executives gone south with your credit card number to some sunny spot that doesn’t have an extradition treaty. But I’m going to give you the chance to pay a very fair price for shoddy merchandise that you can pretend you ordered way before Christmas, and that I guarantee will make it to your beloved eventually, since I have to get it out of my garage. Don’t turn that page yet! Just let me give you my pitch. ’Twas the season to pay mail-order companies a lot of money over the Internet to deliver some thing you could have gotten at Costco for a lot less and returned much more easily. But this is the New Economy, and things seem to be slow ing down a bit these days. If the U.S. is to con tinue leading the world in billion-dollar compa nies without a product or a Web site you can access oi^^ MBfintosh, it ^im portant that we, as Americans, support these industries and help them to grow, the way we did with American Motors in the ’70s and Chrysler in the ’80s, after it acquired AMC and went bankrupt. Besides, it’s nice to have something delivered to your door, everfif it arrives two months after Christmas and doesn’t fit. So I’m doing something new before the year is out, in a patriotic effort to foster economic growth and become a millionaire by creating a company with no taxable assets other than a lap top and the Business Package at Mailboxes, Etc. I really hadn’t known what I was going to do with my life until a few weeks ago, when I found the “International Male” catalog in my mailbox, buff cover model peeking out at me from between the Pottery Barn and Gardener’s Supply rags. I snatched it up immediately, and was absolutely wowed by this year’s collection. “International Male” has been a favorite of twen tysomething Greek racketeers and gay models for decades, but now it really has something for everyone. Today I am delighted to introduce to you a revolutionary new mail-order format that is both flexible and simple. I’m giving you a mail-order form for someone else’s mail-order business, made up of my personal selections from the “International Male” catalog. The idea is that I give you a great deal on a bunch of remaindered stuff, and enclose a bogus “Letter of Apology” with the items I send to your honey, explaining how, because of software problems, the gift you ordered and paid a pre mium price for two months ago simply could not make it there on time. For an extra 50 bucks I will also include a gift certificate toward any items I still have left in my garage that retail for $25 or less. I couldn’t print actual photos because of space constraints and potential lawsuits, as “International Male” has not yet been informed of their new partnership with yours truly, so I will describe the clothes to you as best I can. Next to each offering is a letter. Please circle the appropriate letter and return the form to me,
with a cashier’s check or money order in the amount of the total for the items you order, plus $75 for postage and handling. I can’t guarantee that anything will arrive by Christmas due to the crush of holiday orders, and since Christmas was last Monday, but I will give you my word that I won’t deposit the check until some time next week, when I can get a ride to the bank. Just be careful that you circle the correct letter, because they don’t match the letters in the actual catalog, should you be fortunate enough to come across one. A little design flaw I’ll get to work on very soon. First send the money. Here are my selections: A. The Sleek Short Sleeve Mock ($32) worn by “Francis” would look smashing on anyone possessing 55-inch pecs and lacking self-respect. Francis, of Santa Clara, California, is actually only 5’3” and weighs 120 pounds, but he is transformed into a younger, miniature David Hasselhoff with bigger shoulders when he wears this flatteringly cut mock-T. You have a choice of colors, but I recommend Lime, since that’s the one I’ve got in stock and thus the only one for which I can guarantee delivery. B. You really shouldn’t wear the mock-T without something equally'absurd, and the Wide Leg Gabardine Pant ($49), also sported by our bulging buddy F., fits the bill. I’m serious when I say “wide.” Each leg is sold separately. C. Say you met David Geffen at a bar the night before and you’re bumming around the Malibu mansion the next morning, looking for cash and drugs. If you stroll into his walk-in bed room closet in the master suite, chances are you’ll find a High Country Snuggler ($69), the baby jumper for adults. Slip it on, grab a cup of hot java and curl up on the sofa with the latest issue of Men in Uniform. Get comfortable; the cops won’t be there for hours. D. Whoa! You hear sirens! The Snuggler is comfy, but nothing beats The Step-In ($24), with its patented endowment pouch, for support and freedom of movement when L.A.’s finest are hot on your trail. The loose-fitting style allows for full leg extension when vaulting over concrete highway barriers, yet won’t snag on chain-link fences. You can swim in it, too. E. Whew! That was close. You’re finally home. You’re also exhausted from that little catand-mouse with the real men in uniform, and worse, you’re soaked to the bone from the dip in the viaduct. You need to hop in the shower, wipe away the brine, comb the fiddler crabs out of that tangled mane and pull on The Classic Nightshirt ($24, and hardly classic) while you get ready for bed and turn on the local news. F. Whoever said “no news is good news” was right. There’s no news about you, and that’s good. Stop worrying! Toss that nightshirt in the hamper and find your San Tropez Silk Suit ($59). It’s time to hit the clubs again. There isn’t a single sugar daddy on the entire West Coast who will be able to resist you tonight. So make sure you complete and return the order form promptly. The quality of this mer chandise really speaks for itself. And don’t worry about a thing. Soon I hope to be launching a new 1-900 number, through which ordering will be even easier. I plan to be in business for T months. ®
Joico • Paul Mitchell Sebastion • Bed Head
PROFESSIONAL HAIR CARE PRODUCT CENTER 80 Church St., Burlington • 658-4328
NORTHERN CART0GRAPH I 4050 Williston Rd. • South Burlington • 860-2881
Serving our famous menu for FIRST NIGHT & N E W YEARS EVE until 11:30 pm. Ring in the N ew Year in our lounge till 12:30 pm. H ave a Fun N ew Y ear/ 115 St. Paul St. Downtown Burlington 862-4106
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DOWNHILL SKIS • SNOWBOARDS XCSKIS • TELEMARK SKIS •SNOWSHOES Well help you price it and well put it on sale on Saturday, January 6. When your items sell, you get 100% o f the proceeds as a credit towards $ new equipment, or 80% as cash. ri OUR GRAND RE-OPEf R CELEBRATION
M-Th 10-7; Fr 10-8; Sat JM>; Sun 11-5. 85 Main Street 658-3313 * 1-800 -882-4 IM PORTANT: Used equipment accepted 10.00 am January 2 W l 8:00 pm Jam LOTS OF N EW E Q U IP M E N T O N SALE , T O O !
FO R M O R E IN F O , CALL
658-33 13 ■H Bj
VERMONT STATE CRAFT CENTER
FR O G H O LLO W G«»ll(?ries • Education • Exhibits Middlebury Gallery presents m
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a solo exhibition by * B ru c e R . M c D o n a ld Nov
172000
through Jan
1 2001
image: Millennium peppermill and Zoomee saltshaker by Bruce R. McDonald One Mill Street, Middlebury Mon-Sat 9:30-5:30 • Sun 11 -5 (VIII)IH I BURY
liU H LIN IiT O N
MANCHESTER
802.388 31 /7
802 .803.0458
802 . 362.3321
www.froghollow.org
Do You?.. h a rd c o p y v e rm o n t.c o m
COPYING FULL COLOR COPIES BOOKLETS BINDING CARBONLESS FORMS CUTTING PICK-UP & DELIVERY MANUALS NEWSLETTERS POSTCARDS LAMINATING FAXING PERSONALIZED MOUSE PADS FOLDING AND SO MUCH MORE...
H ARD COPY
30 Main Street Burlington
8 6 3 -1 2 0 0
Good Copfw ☆ Gnat Meed
M-F8:30-5:30
Need Som e Inspiration? Browse our tine art and craft collection tor a distinctive gift.
FURCHGCnT SOURQFFE
Alison Goodwin,
A< loss horn th r Shi'lLuinc Shopping I ’.irk, Shelburne'
STILL DECKING THE HALLS
Would abstract art have a chance in Vermont without the
Doll-Anstadt? In its threeyears, the Burlington art gallery has established a solid reputation for exhibiting and nur turing a stable ofpredominantly non-representational artists, both local and national, along with a handful offine photographers and artisans. This month and next, D-A celebrates them, and another year of business, with a group show titled "Vernissage 2001, ”featuring 35 artists in multiple media. Pictured, "Equinox, ” by Kate Davis.
T h e F in e A rt F r a m e s h o p 201)')
W il l is l o n R o a d <5 S o u t h B u r l in g t o n
8 0 2 - 8 0 0 -1 8 1 1 ® 1- 8 8 8 - 8 0 0 -7 0 8 0
Where framing is an art!
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F W ir a T io n s h a n d c ra fte d $ I f t s
G et w h a t Santa fo r g o t
for
e v e ry d a y liv in g 2 0
% o ff
non consignment items thru Saturday
o p e n in g s LUCINDA MASON, painting with mixed media, and UNMATCHED, match-cover art by Diane Sullivan. Red Square, Burlington, 8 6 2 -3 7 7 9 . Reception January 5, 6-9 p.m. FRESH FISH: CONTEMPORARY ICHTHY OLOGIES, featuring artwork inspired by the first vertebrates, by Michael Sm ith, Amy White, P.K. Ellis, Art Blue and Terry Barrett. Fletcher Room, Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 8 6 5 7 2 1 1 . Also, FOOD FOR THOUGHT: LOOK ING AT FOOD AND CONNECTED IDEATION, artworks by members of Caravan Arts on the subject of sustenance. Pickering Room. Reception for both January 6 , 3-5 p.m.
o n g o in g BURLINGTON AREA
0-5 3 )fa fh Corners page 36 ’
SEVEN DAYS 1 •'1i 'V-«<
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HOME AND AWAY, recent paintings by Ellen Mazur Thomson. Mezzanine Balcony, Fletcher Free Library, 8 6 5 7 2 1 1 . January 1-31. FRIENDS AND FAMILY, a group show in mixed media. Men's Room, Burlington, 8 6 4 -2 0 8 8 . Through February. ARTHUR HINES, photographs, TONY SCHULL and TISHA SCHULL, paintings, Daily Planet, Burlington, 8 6 2 -3 7 7 9 , January 2-31. DANIEL PITTMAN, new works in mixed media. Firehouse Center for the Visual Arts, Burlington, 8 6 5 -7 1 6 5 . Through January 14. Also, “ Chimney Tree," an installation in the former Hood Plant, S. Winooski Ave.r Burlington, viewable
d e c e m b e r 2 7 , 2 0 0 0 & ja n u a iy 3 , 200 1 Vv'% i ^ ;I fc-Vv*vi**.
from street. Ongoing. PATHS, travel photographs by Berne Broudy and Mike Donohue. Muddy Waters, Burlington, 4 3 4 -5 0 7 4 . Through December. SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW, Vermont scenic photographs by Fred Stetson. Dorothy A iling Memorial Library, W illiston Village, 8 7 8 -4 9 1 8 . Through January 30. SEEING WITH NEW PERSPECTIVE, NeoSurrealist paintings by Ethan Azarian and Neo-Surrealist Assemblage by Greg Brower. Flynndog Gallery, Burlington, 6 5 2 -9 9 8 5 . Through January 23. PERFORMANCE ART, paintings by Robert Waldo Brunelle Jr. and Alice Murdoch. Amy E. Tarrant Gallery, Flynn Center, Burlington, 86 -FLYNN. Through December. VERNISSAGE 2001, an annual holiday group show of D-A represented artists, celebrating three years of business at the gallery. Doll-Anstadt Gallery, Burlington, 8 6 4 -3 6 6 1 . Through December. FACES OF OUR COMMUNITY, photo graphs by Julie Steedman. Burlington City Hall, 8 6 0 -4 4 3 6 . Through January 2. FEATHERS IN FLIGHT, monotypes in oil by Lyna Lou Nordstrom. Finale Salon, S. Burlington, 8 6 2 -0 7 1 3 . Through January 15. THE ALLURE OF THE CURVE, featuring
Grace Pomerleau, Peter DeLuca and Ruth Pope. Frog Hollow Vermont State
ration by Alex W illiam s and Claudia
Craft Center, Burlington, 8 6 3 -6 4 5 8 . Through December. FLIGHTS OF FANCY, a group show fea tu rin g 15 local artists in varied media. Furchgott Sourdiffe Gallery, Shelburne, 9 8 5 -3 8 4 8 . Through January 16. FRENCH IMPRESSIONS, paintings by Carolyn Walton from a recent trip to the Dordogne River Valley. LuxtonJones Gallery, Shelburne, 9 8 5 -8 2 2 3 . Through December. CLEMENT, mixed-media works by Joe Harig. Daily Planet Restaurant, Burlington, 8 6 2 -9 6 4 7 . Through January 1. A SENSE OF PLACE: DRAWING ON VER MONT’S REGIONAL CHARACTER, fine hand-pulled prints from ink drawings by David Goodrich. Pickering Room, Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 8 6 5 7 2 1 1 . Also, ILLUMINATED MANUSCRIPT VARIATIONS, mixed-media works by Scott deBie. Fletcher Room. Both through December. ELDER ART, featuring the works of local seniors. Brownell Public Library, Essex Jet., 8 7 8 -6 9 5 5 . Through December. IN THE MESH, recent abstract works by Peter Russom. Rhombus Gallery, Burlington, 8 6 5 -3 1 4 4 . Through December. THE LAST FRONTIER, an evolving ceiling installation by Torin Porter; visitors are invited to leave lightweight objects for inclusion. Club Metronome, Burling ton, 8 6 5 -4 5 6 3 . Through December.
Venon. Grannis Gallery, Burlington,
THE FABULOUS ’50S: WELCOME HOME
6 6 0 -2 0 3 2 . Through January.
TO POST-WAR VERMONT, the m useum ’s
WINTER WONDERLAND, featuring the
newest historic house, depicting a Vermont fam ily in 19 5 0; SOMETHING
hand-forged sculptural gold jewelry by Timothy Grannis and a photo-collabo
work of Vermont artisans, including
'
OLD, SOMETHING NEW: C ontinuity and Change in American Furniture and Decorative Arts, 1 7 0 0 -1 8 2 0 ; FROM GEORGE WASHINGTON TO P.T. BARNUM, prints; and LANDSCAPE & LIGHT, paint ings by Martin Johnson Heade. Shelburne Museum, 9 8 5 -3 3 4 8 . Ongoing. RICK SUTTA, oil paintings “ with im pact." Rick Sutta Gallery, Burlington, 8 6 0 -7 5 0 6 . Ongoing.
CH AM PLAIN VALLEY TOM HOMANN & JILL MADDEN, ceramics and paintings. Ferrisburgh Artisans Guild, 8 7 7 -3 6 6 8 . Through January. DONNA OWENS, wild and domestic ani mal photographs, and ALFRED JARGER, handcrafted furniture. M arvin’s Carvins, Ferrisburgh, 8 7 7 -6 2 8 3 . Through December. HOLIDAY SHOW, featuring unique artis tic g ifts by Vermonters. Carving Studio & Sculpture Center, W. Rutland, 4 3 8 2 0 9 7 . Through December. CECIL “SPIKE" BELL: VERMONT’S SEC OND-GENERATION ASHCAN ARTIST, paintings and prints. Chaffee Art Center, Rutland, 7 7 5 -0 3 5 6 . Through January 7. 2001 FIGURATIVE MANIFESTATIONS, works of art and craft based on the human figure, by Lynne Barton and Mariel Phair. Barton P itti Gallery, Rutland, 4 3 8 -5 6 1 1 . Through January 1. METALWORKS, a solo exhibit by con temporary metal artisan Bruce R. MacDonald. Frog Hollow Vermont State Craft Center, Middlebury, 3 8 8 4 0 7 4 . Through January 1. STONES, SCHOLARS AND SUPPORTERS: MIDDLEBURY AND THE GROWTH OF ITS COLLEGE, a m ulti-m edia exhibit in honor of the college’s bicentennial. Henry Sheldon Museum, Middlebury, 3 8 8 -2 1 1 7 . Through March.
CENTRAL VERM ONT NORTHERN LIGHTS, clay lighting by Doug Blum, Dennis Kirchm ann, Walt Schm idt and Jim Schneider. Vermont Clay Studio, Waterbury, 2 4 4 -1 1 2 6 . uary £ -3 1 . E IT HOME: AftT FOR REAL PEOPLE, ' featuring works in m ultiple media by 21 artist members. Studio Place Arts, Barre, 4 7 9 -7 0 6 9 . Through January 13. RAY BROWN, landscape paintings. Mist Grill Gallery, Waterbury, 2 4 4 -2 2 3 3 . Through January 15. WINTER WHIMSEY, a holiday exhibit of toys, ornaments and playful clay objects. Vermont Clay Studio, Waterbury, 2 4 4 -1 1 2 6 . Through December. THEMES AND VARIATIONS, stained glass, dolls, masks and decorated gourds by Chris and Meredith Martin; stoneware and porcelain works by Judy Jensen. Chandler Gallery, Randolph, 7 2 8 -9 8 7 8 . Through January 7. BEFORE THE GOLDEN DOME: THE STATE HOUSE NEIGHBORHOOD, 1859-1907, featuring historic photographs reveal ing daily life in M ontpelier before the dome was gilded. The Vermont Historical Society presents at the State House Card Room, Montpelier, 2 3 4 -5 0 3 9 . Through January. FIRE & SPICE: THE CULINARY ALCHEMY,
t
photographs by Jeffrey P. Roberts. A % Single Pebble Restaurant, Berlin, 4 7 6 -9 7 0 0 . Through January 24. VERMONT HAND CRAFTERS: Work by local artisans. Vermont By Design Gallery, Waterbury, 2 4 4 -7 5 6 6 . Ongoing. SCRAP-BASED ARTS & CRAFTS, featur ing re-constructed objects of all kinds by area artists. The Restore, Montpelier, 2 2 9 -1 9 3 0 . Ongoing. ALICE ECKLES, paintings and mixed media. Old School House, Marshfield, 4 5 6 -8 9 9 3 . Ongoing.
Venice,
NORTHERN PETER MILLER The Waterbury photogra pher features "Stowe Moonscape” and other work. Vermont Fine Art, Gale Farm Center, Stowe, 2 5 3 -9 6 5 3 . Through December. JEANETTE CHUPACK, recent paintings. Clarke Galleries, Stowe, 2 5 3 -7 1 1 6 . Through January 7. 1ST ANNUAL MEMBERS’ EXHIBIT, fea tu rin g paintings and sculpture by more than 50 area artists. Also, the 20TH ANNUAL FESTIVAL OF THE TREES, Christmas greenery and paintings by Alice and Walton Blodgett. Helen Day Art Center, Stowe, 2 5 3 -8 3 5 8 . Through December 30.
SO UTHERN NAPOLEON IN EGYPT, engravings, photographs, maps, letters and artifacts; and LUIGI LUCIONI: A CENTENARY RET ROSPECTIVE OF A RENAISSANCE REAL IST, landscapes and still lifes by the part-tim e Vermonter (1 9 0 0 -1 9 8 8 ). Elizabeth de C. Wilson Museum, Southern Vermont Arts Center, Manchester, 3 6 2 -1 4 0 5 . Through January.
ELSEW H ERE PICASSO: THE VOLLARD SUITE, 19301937, featuring 100 prints compiled by French art dealer Ambroise Vollard. Hood Museum of Art, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 6 0 3 -6 4 6 2 8 0 8 . Through March 11. HITCHCOCK, an exhibit devoted to the Alfred H itchcock’s film s, with posters, production stills, film clips, annotated scripts and set models. Montreal Museum of Fine Arts, 5 1 4 -2 8 5 -1 6 0 0 . Through March 18. SURFACE AND DEPTH: TRENDS IN CON TEMPORARY PORTRAIT PHOTOGRAPHY, featuring the work of eight artists exploring new photographic practices. Hood Museum of Art, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 6 0 3 -6 4 6 2 8 0 8 . Through December. ®
PLEASE NOTE: Seven Days is unable to accommodate all o f the displays in our readership area, thus these list ings must be restricted to exhibits in truly public viewing places. Art in business offices, lobbies and private residences or studios, with occasional exceptions, will not be accepted. Send art listings to galleries@sevendaysvt.com. You can also view art listings at www.sevendaysvt.com.
B y M arc A wodey
J
ill Madden is a descendant of the Venetians, artistically speaking. They were the first to describe Italian light with oil paint, and it can be argued that the shimmering backgrounds of Bellini, Giorgione, Titian and their contemporaries eventually led to Monet, Pisarro and much of the landscape painting we see today. Unlike the Tuscan painters, Venetians created structure with tonalities rather than line. They also developed the interesting trick of using warm background colors, like red, to enliven their sylvan habitats. Madden, of Weybridge, has an MFA from Boston Univer sity, and in her current exhibit of landscapes at the Ferrisburgh Artisans Guild, she frequently “Four Seasons — Summer,” by Jill Madden employs modern versions of these old Venetian ideas. She is her technique is excellent, but it exhibit much greater control. a well-informed painter. Still, “Twilight at-Gorge” has the clashes with the subject matter. iliere ls:something iirtfsfrating ’s, In an ambitious cycle of sea same purview as the large cycle about her work. A discerning of seasons and seems much sons — “Four Seasonsviewer may wish to turn the more compact. Pallet knife Summer,” “Autumn Harvest,” paintings upside down or side work provides a textural coun “Winter” and “Spring Runoff” ways, in order to appreciate the terpoint to the brush, and — Madden presents the same zeal of the painting. Madden’s use of color is adven wooded creek throughout the “Night Poplars” is a large, turous yet well-integrated with year, with a different palate for vertical piece featuring two thin her color scheme. The few each season. As the four can poplars standing before an slashes of crimson amidst the vasses are the same size — aggressively painted lavender dark greens of “Twilight at about 50 by 48 inches — the sky. Madden tends to use a rap Gorge” are just the sort of state composition remains generally idly laid-down impasto over her ment the larger pieces could the same while Madden focuses underpainting, use. The cerulean blues playing and in this case behind various yellows and pur the underpaint ples in “Snake Mountain — ing is quite Summer Sunset” are also quite unusual — a effective. Her consistencies of matrix of large surface treatment, paint applica orange dots. tion and apparently definitive Was she simply color choices make the smaller reusing an old pieces some of the most engag canvas, or was ing of the show. this part of her In 1943, Mark Rothko original con wrote in a letter to The New cept? It is a neat York Times, “It is a widely idea, providing on shifting light and textures accepted notion am<?ng painters a hidden structure beneath her throughout the year. She makes that it does not matter what frenetic brushwork. particularly good use of purples, one paints, as long as it is well The problem is not how the and her triadic harmonies in painted. This is the essence of picture is painted — its the “Four Seasons — Summer,” are academicism. There is no such picture itself. The poplars are of chromatic classics. The muddy thing as a good painting about nearly equal height, truncating nothing.” olive and brown local hues of the picture plane. The brown “Spring Runoff” are also effec At this point in cultural his foreground elements at lower tory, the description of a ver tive, and Maddens grays in the left are too similar in value to upper third of that piece dant Vermont glen is essentially the horizon, flattening the space a painting about nothing. A demonstrate she can be a really in a way that seems unintended. effective colorist. However, a decisive brushstroke can Maddens strong, scribbly very raw patch of ultramarine is become its own continent. For brushstrokes dive into the scene somewhat jarring, and the over painters with a strong hand without much regard for the all paint quality of the cycle and an informed eye, perhaps edges and corners of the canvas. seems uneven and hasty. there should be no middle Again, this is a real flaw in a Maddens smaller canvasses ground. ® landscape painting. Simply put,
The problem is not how the picture is
painted — it’s the: picture itself.
Jill Madden, paintings. Ferrisburgh Artisans Guild. Through January 14.
december 27, 2 0 0 0 & january 3, 2001
SEVEN DAYS
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...A G O O D Y E A R !
Manson visuals were as eye-poppingly bold as anything since Kubrick at his career peak. And, again, Jennifer Lopez in a thong. 6. The Contender Even with a revised final act that relies on a few too many vio lins and patriotic speeches, this gritty, shrewdly penned and superbly acted suspensefest got my vote as the best and brightest look at American political life to come along in years.
Blown G la ss by Henry and W endy Besett
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OUT OF SIGHT The latest from director Lars von Trier starred Bjork as a young mother slowly going blind and the pairing produced the year’s most visionary work.
BEST (AND WORST) IN SHOW
L
ets face it: In the world of cinema, 2000 was the Year of the Dog. Hollywood is strug gling to even come up with viable Oscar nominees. Hardly the way to start a new century. Insipid digital exhibitions {MissionImpossible 2), formulaic chickflicks {Here On Earth) and thrillers with all the edge-of-yourseat suspense of making toast (What Lies Beneath) were the order of the day. You know you’ve hit some sort of cultural nadir when the titles that attracted the most enthusiastic response in the course of 12 months are pictures like Meet the Parents, Charlies Angels and How the Grinch Stole Christmas. And when something like The Grinch actually turns out to be one of the year’s 10 or 12 best. O f course, there’s the possibili ty that it’s not. As usual, the prob lem with writing a year-end look back at the best and worst films in mid-December is the fact that a dozen or so of the most buzzedabout titles won’t hit town until after this goes to press. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, Traffic, Quills, Requiem For a Dream, Pollock and Chocolat, for example.
Odds are there’s an Oscar winner in that short list. But duty calls, so here’s my list. And bear in mind: I’m not saying these are the 10 best and worst movies released in the past year — just the best and worst I had the opportunity to see. Happy holidays, and better cine matic luck to us all in the new year. THE 1 0 B E S T (in d e sce n d in g order)
185 P E A R L STREET D O W N T O W N B U R L IN G T O N
8 S 4 -7 9 1 7 L U N C H M - F 11:3 0 - 2 D IN N E R 7 D A Y S 4 :3 0 - 1 0 W W W . P A R IM A T H A I. C O M
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SEVEN DAYS
1. Dancer in the D ark Through the combination of his no-frills aesthetic and attrac tion to intellectual adventure, Breaking the Waves director Lars von Trier has achieved cinematic miracles, but none, I think, com december 27, 200 0 & january 3, 2001
pares with the trick he pulls off here — hiring a first-time actress (Bjork) and making a bleak, doom-infused tragedy that also happens to be the best musical in years. 2. Gladiator Great fun. Great hero. Great perverted emperor. Great camera work, art direction and dialogue, as well as the greatest use ever made of computer special effects. If you’re going to spend $100 mil lion on a movie, this is what it should look like — not Speed 2 or Wild, Wild West.
3. Erin Brockovich Scrappy work ing-class mom takes on a giant utility armed with nothing but a high school diploma, an atti tude and a push up bra worthy of a Best Supporting Oscar. Steven Soderbergh’s fact-based saga was mainstream moviemaking at its funny, heart felt, button-pushing best.
7. Angelas Ashes I enjoyed every soggy minute of Alan Parker’s adaptation of Frank McCourt’s best-selling boy hood memoir. The author’s wit may be about the only dry thing in it, but the cast does a dandy job, the cinematography saturates the screen with a terrible beauty and the director pulls it all togeth er with the ear, eye and heart of a poet. 8. The Perfect Storm Wolfgang {Das Boot) Petersen is the anti-Costner. He should make only movies that involve water. Which this had up the wazoo. A surprisingly potent cocktail of terror, bravado, irony and tenderness that’ll rank with the greatest sea stories on film.
WATER WHIRLED Clooney and crew set a course for movie history.
4. Joe Gould’s Secret In 1995 Stanley Tucci sur prised everybody with Big Night. Then 1998’s The Imposters had promise written all over it. But it’s the writer-director-actor’s third effort which fulfills that promise in spades. One of the best films ever made on the subject of the artistic process and personality. 5. The Cell With a plot and pacing that hummed like a finely tuned fear machine and, more importantly, Jennifer Lopez in a thong, this was a pull-out-the-stops, day-glo funhouse ride and freakshow rolled into one. The Michelangelo-meets-Marilyn-
9. Men of Honor You see what sort of year it’s been? And we’re only at number 9. As tried and true as the Hollywood recipe for this tri umph-over-adversity saga was, the fact is that the high-powered per formances given by the film’s stars and the inspirational power of its subject’s life story lifted the pic ture beyond mere formula. On top of which — how can you not like Cuba Gooding? 10. Frequency I’m not even going to make excuses for this one. If you can find a better, more affecting timetravel-baseball-murder mystery combo, I’d love to hear about it. continued on next page
shorts * = REFUND, PLEASE * * = COULD'VE BEEN WORSE, BUT NOTA LOT * * * = HAS ITS MOMENTS; SO-SO * * * * = SMARTER THAN THEAVERAGE BEAR * * * * * = AS GOOD AS IT GETS
WES CRAVEN PRESENTS: DRACULA 2000 And th a t’s about all he does. Patrick Lussier directs and Johnny Lee M iller stars in th is um pteenth update of the vampire legend. (R) THE FAMILY MAN I t ’s a Wonderful Life meets The Sixth Sense, sort of, in the story of a Wall Street playboy who wakes up one m orning m agically trans planted into the life he m ight have led if he'd married his high-school sweet heart. Nicolas Cage and Tea Leoni star. (PG-13) M ISS CONGENIALITY Sandra Bullock stars in the story of an unrefined FBI agent who gets a major makeover so she can go undercover in a beauty pageant. Michael Caine costars. Donald Petrie directs. (PG-13) CAST AWAY From Robert ( What Lies Beneath) Zemeckis comes the reason Tom Hanks grew that beard, the story of a corporate strategist stranded on a desert island for four years. With Helen Hunt. (PG-13) WHAT WOMEN WANT Mel Gibson stars in the new comedy from w riter-director Nancy Meyers, in the role of a regular guy who suddenly develops the a b ility
to hear what women are thinking. With Helen Hunt. (PG-13) PROOF OF LIFE***172 Fiction and reality meet in th is action adventure about a hostage negotiator who falls in love with the wife of the American busi nessman he’s sent to South America to save. Meg Ryan and Russell Crowe star. Taylor Hackford directs. (R) HEY, DUDE, WHERE’S MY CAR?*** Seann W illiam Scott and Ashton Kutcher play hard-partying potheads who wake up one m orning to find they can’t find their car and need to piece together the events of the previous night. Jennifer Garner costars. Danny Leiner directs. (PG-13) THE EMPEROR’S NEW GROOVE*172 Disney’s latest animated musical com edy te lls the story of a young emperor transformed into a llama by a devious and power-hungry enemy. Featuring the music of Sting. (PG) DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS**172 Jeremy Irons and Thora Birch star in this oddly tim ed — does anyone actually play this anymore? — game-inspired tale about an evil wizard and his plot to dethrone a beautiful empress. (PG13) UNBREAKABLE*** Bruce W illis had a sixth sense it would pay to team up w ith w riter-director M. Night Shyamalan again. He’s joined by Robin Wright and Samuel L. Jackson in the story of a security guard who survives a devastating train wreck and comes to believe he has a rare condi-
tion which makes him indestructible. (PG-13) DR. SEUSS’ HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS***172 Ron Howard directs th is adaptation of the children’s clas sic. Jim Carrey stars as the big green meanie. With Christine Baranski and Molly Shannon. (PG) 102 DALMATI0NS** It’s official: Oncegreat French thespian Gerard Depardieu has gone to the dogs. The actor joins Glenn Close for this liveaction sequel in which Cruella and company set their sights on a finan cially troubled orphanage for the spot ted pups. Directed by Kevin Lima. (G) RUGRATS IN PARIS: THE MOVIE*** Susan Sarandon, John Lithgow and Debbie Reynolds lend their voices to the latest big-screen saga starring everybody’s favorite animated toddlers. This tim e around, the gang travels to France to take in the new Euro Reptar theme park. (G) BILLY ELLIOT***172 Jamie Bell and Julie Walters star in the saga of a talented young dancer torn between the expec tations of his working-class fam ily and his deep love of performing. Stephen Daldry directs. (R) WHAT LIES BENEATH** Harrison Ford and Michelle Pfeiffer star in the latest from Forrest Gump director Robert Zemeckis. Shot partially in Vermont, the picture tells the spooky story of a wife who becomes convinced the ghost of a woman with whom her husband once had an affair is haunting their
home and planning to do them harm. Amber Valletta costars. (PG-13) ALMOST FAMOUS***172 The latest from Jerry Maguire director Cameron Crowe _j. is the semiautobiographical tale of a teenage boy who gains entry to the heady world of big-tim e rock journal ism. Billy Crudup, Kate Hudson and Frances McDormand star. (R) ME, MYSELF & IRENE*** Jim Carrey plays good cop-bad cop without any help from anyone, as a sp lit personali ty in the latest laugher from the Farrelly brothers. Renee Zellweger costars as the woman he fin d s arrest ing. (R) BEDAZZLED**172 Harold Ramis brings us th is remake of a 1967 comedy in which Satan materializes in the form of a beautiful woman and offers to
grant a loser seven wishes in exchange for his soul. Brendan Fraser and Elizabeth Hurley star. (PG-13)
new on video GODZILLA 2000** No relation to Matthew Broderick’s made-in-the-USA fiasco, th is is the latest in the long and good, old-fashioned line of Japanese imports. It pits the big lizard against a space monster th a t’s just wakened from a 6000-year nap. Takao Okawara directs. Yes, the Takao Okawara. (PG) THE ART OF W AR**172 What on Earth is Wesley Snipes doing in th is dated, ’80s-style dumbathon about a security expert battling a band of ruthless ter rorists? Did somebody lose Jean-Claude Van Damme’s phone number? (R)
the hoyts cinemas
FiLMQuIZ cosponsored by Lippa’s Jewelers
THE 1 0 W O R ST
(in ever-worsening order)
1. Reindeer Games John Frankenheimers Yuletide heist saga had more problems than Old Saint Nick has presents. Hopefully the next time the veteran director sits on Santas lap, R^~a$k.for a project worthy of his talent. 2. Mickey Blue Eyes It had a budget every bit as big. With James Caan in its cast, it had gangster-movie cred. It had as unlikely a wiseguy (Hugh Grant) as any movie is ever likely to have. But did it have a thing to offer a world that had already seen Analyze Thisi Fuhgeddaboutit. 3. Here On Earth Leelee Sobieski played an Mtv-generation Ali McGraw, even though she’s clearly been cloned from Helen Hunt in this bit of paint-by-numbers bathos that lamely attempted to rip-off Love Story.
NEGATIVE SPACE Travolta’s sci-fi epic was an intergalactic hackjob that deserved its universally bad reviews.
two hours. And, am I the only one who has a problem with those rubber masks everybody wears in these movies? What is this, “Get Smart”? 6. Gone in 60 Seconds The latest collaboration between Nicolas Cage and pro ducer Jerry Bruckheimer and, like Con A ir and The Rock, a work of cinema designed to allow the Academy Award-win ning thespian to grow... more financially secure.
4. What Lies Beneath Stunningly banal grab-bag of genre cliches and joy-buzzer devices borrowed from such cinematically significant works as Friday the 13th. The only mystery here was how Robert Zemeckis talked anybody into comparing this to the work of Hitchcock.
7. Lucky Numbers John Travolta and Nora {Michael) Ephron reteamed for a comedy about a smarmy weatherman who rigs the lot tery. The odds that anyone who saw this thought he got his money’s worth? Extremely long indeed.
5. Mission Impossible 2 Tom Cruise shooting guns in slow motion upside down for
8. Whipped If there was a more laughfree comedy in the past year, this was it. Peter M. Cohen’s
twentysomething eye-view of the battle between the sexes offered the least-watchable look at modern love since I f Lucy Fell And is sure to prove as memorable. 9. Scream 3 The third time isn’t always a charm. Next to this, the last 11 or 12 Freddy Krueger sequels looked like vintage Hitchcock. 10. Battlefield Earth A busy year for Travolta. The obviously troubled actor spent a decade bringing L. Ron Hubbard’s half-baked vision to the big screen, but it’s unlikely he made anyone who saw it a believer (though he did make the Church of Scientology a truckload of money by cutting it in on the deal). On the other hand, you had to savor the poetic justice in such an intergalactic hackjob’s receiving uni versally bad reviews. With any luck, he’ll take next year off. ®
face lifts Once again w e’ve selected scenes from four wellknown movies and, through the magic of Film Quiz Technology, zapped the famous faces of their stars right out of the picture. Your job, as always, is to identify the four films anyway, minus their stars and with only a single clue-ridden scene apiece to go on.
For more film fun don’t forget to watch "Art Patrol" every Thursday, Friday and Sunday on News Channel 5!
LAST W EEK'S W IN N E R S
LAST W EEK’S ANSW ERS: 1. E 2. A
Winners to be announced January 10.
3. 4.
F H
5.
G
6. B 7.
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DEADLINE: MONDAY • PRIZES: 10 PAIRS OF FREE PASSES PER WEEK. PLUS, EACH WEEK ONE LUCKY W INNER W ILL RECEIVE A GIFT CERTIFICATE COURTESY OF CARBUR’S RESTAURANT & LOUNGE. SEND ENTRIES TO: FILM QUIZ PO BOX 6 8 , W ILLISTON, VT 0 5 4 9 5 . OR EMAIL TO ultrfnprd@ aol.com . BE SURE TO INCLUDE YOUR ADDRESS. PLEASE ALLOW FOUR TO SIX WEEKS FOR DELIVERY OF PRIZES.
december 27, 2 00 0 & january 3, 2001
SEVEN DAYS u
page 39
Back Track: 2000 in Review continued from page 11
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tA ^ ° Sharon Underwood of Norwich has one son who is gay. She’d opened her heart to express the pain that the hateful rhetoric of the ignorant and closed-minded had caused. Her letter drew an outpouring of gratitude the likes of which we haven’t experienced before.
You religious folk just cant bear the thought that as my son emerges from the hell that was his child hood, he might like tofind a life long companion and have a meas ure of happiness. It offends your sensibilities that he should request the right to visit that companion in the hospital, to make medical deci sions for him or to benefitfrom tax laws governing inheritance... You use religion to abdicate your responsibility to be thinking human beings. There are vast numbers of reli gious people who find your attitudes repugnant. God is notfor the privi leged majority, and God knows my son has committed no sin. On the media front, The Burlington Free Press was at least
win back the House paid off as the GOP took 83 of the 150 seats. Bye-bye, Democrat Speaker M ich ae l Obuchowski. Hello, Speaker Walter Freed. (Neither one a life-of-the-party type.) The GOP won with the help of the “Take Back Vermont” brigade. That should make for a lively Republican caucus in the new year. Will Walt give the devil his due? But the Vermont House does not run this state — hasn’t, real ly, since Ralph W right was Speaker. The Democrats held
Decem ber As this edition of Seven Days hits the street two days after Christmas, we finally know who will be sworn in as President next month — the guy who lost Vermont’s Republican presidential primary last March. And the same guy who lost Vermont’s presiden tial election in November — George W. Bush. Can’t blame Vermont for the coming four years of the Bush White House II. Secession, anyone? Closer to home, heading into this weekend’s tournament, Gilligan’s Gorillas are 5-0 in ECAC play. Cinderella con tinues to be spotted in the Gutterson park ing lot, but no one’s seen her get out of her SUV yet. Earlier this month, Seven Days opened r some eyes with the report that way, way before California, Oregon, Colorado or Arizona ever thought of it, Vermont passed a medical marijuana law. A leader for the nation once again! Only problem is, Vermont’s law, passed back in 1981, has never been implemented. It was as if the state legalized booze but refused to license bars and restaurants. Sick and dying Vermont cancer patients have been the losers. Finally, listen up so you don’t panic next Wednesday, January 3: Seven Days will not publish a paper next week. Vacation time. We’ll be back on Wednesday, January 10. Happy New Year, one and all! ®
In May, LaTulippe
finally had to sit dow under oath in a
retrial deposition.
V ->
Guess what? He’d lied
consistent — consistently pathetIn a front-page photo of a tel evised gubernatorial debate, the Freeps whited out the Channel 3 News logo on the coffee cups used by the candidates. That’s the of Gannett competitive spirit! Real classy outfit.
Novem ber Unlike the national election, Vermont’s election was over well before midnight. Ruth Dwyer saved her finest moment for last — she conceded gracefully and early in the evening. The Republican campaign to
page 4 0
SEVEN DAYS
december 27, 2 0 0 0 & january 3, 2001
their Senate majority, and HoHo won outright, too. Dean received 50.4 percent. Dwyer got only 37.9 percent. And Pollina, despite a $265,000 public financing handout, couldn’t crack the 10 percent ceiling. That meant the outcome would not be decided by the leg islature in January. And it meant Vermont’s political lawn-sign tap estry would vanish before the Christmas lights popped up. Whew! And UVM hockey was back in the news, only this time it was all about what was happening on the ice. Coach Gilligan’s Gorillas shot out to a 4-0 record in the ECAC. Cinderella had been spotted in the Gutterson parking lot.
E-m ail Peter at Inside Track VT@aol. com
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Up in the Air, Part II Folks who live around North Hill in Ludlow are resisting the idea of a private airstrip in their back yards, which is part of a proposed nine-unit devel opment of upscale houses. As one resident pointed out, the people who chose the area cherish the quiet, which is exactly why they live outside of town. “This is not a case of buying a house on a lake and then complaining of high waters,” Otis Nelson told the select board. “Many of us bought our properties on North Hill to avoid a busy life.” The select board, for its part, eventually voted against the air strip, even though it’s not clear they even have jurisdiction, since airports are normally reviewed and regulated by the state. Still, they saw an opportunity to take a position, and their posi tion is that its a “bad idea.” — Black River Tribune, December 6 ’Tis the Season It’s Christmas, and we got the attitude. Spotted recently: “Martians, Santa Go Mano a Mano,” “Take Charge to End Static Electricity” and “Penguin Invasion Was a Good Thing.” Elsewhere, we are asked, “Why Sit Home When You Could Be Out Having an Adventure?” If we want an adventure but don’t know where to find one, there’s always, “Break Out the Polyester, Hustle to North Adams.” — Deerfield Valley News, December 7 and 14, Bellows Falls Town Crier, December 15, Stowe Reporter, December 14, Herald of Randolph, December 14
e le b r a te
retail theft and has simply worn out his welcome. Most recently, he got caught using his 9-year-old son as an accomplice to steal cigarettes, and the state’s attorney specifically asked that Button be punished for teaching his son to steal. He’s been caught doing this before, too: In March of this year he was seen at an auto parts store in Newport try ing to stuff a tool under his son’s jacket. Button was sentenced to 10 days and was ordered to write an apology to his son. — Addison County Independent, December 11
Cold Storage An entombment center proposed for a cemetery in Hardwick triggered some heated discussion recently — about a dozen neighbors and abutters came to a recent hearing to protest the building, which will house dead bodies during the winter months when the ground is frozen. The protesters cited health concerns and the general “creepiness” of having the newly dead stored so close to their homes. This triggered some unseemly hooting from at least one cemetery trustee, Earl Coolbeth, who dismissed the concerns as “foolishness” and “childish.” Things seem to have gone downhill from there. “There was a lot of yelling,” said peti tioner Cassandra Kiff about the meeting. “There were a lot of personal attacks. I got hollered at.” In a letter to the editor, local clergyman Wayne Corcoran described the pro posed building as a “desecra tion” and the site “dismem bered like the hand of an Arab thief” from the larger cemetery parcel. But still another neigh bor pointed out that the ceme tery itself is full of people in roughly the same condition: Never once, in his 10 years in the neighborhood, has anyone from the cemetery made any trouble, nor do they get up and walk away. “What’s the big deal?” he wondered. The zoning board eventual ly granted the permit, but pru dently waited until the noisy part of the meeting had ended and almost everyone had gone home. — Hardwick Gazette, December 13
Wayne Corcoran
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A Bird in the Hand The British Falconry School at The Equinox in Manchester may be the victim of its own success. The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service has been getting complaints about the 5year-old program from fal coners who would rather the sport not be taught to the general public. One of the attractions of handling and flying birds of prey, it seems, is its exclusivity. A public comment period is underway to deter mine whether the current regulations should be amended to allow hands-on programs with raptors in a school setting. Questions on the table include whether permits should be required, whether stu dents will hurt the raptors or themselves, and whether schools like this one increase the workload of wildlife agencies. — Manchester Journal, December 8
thief” from the
larger cemetery
h u b s
Voted off the Island Walter Button of Middlebury will not be allowed to do any Christmas shopping in Addison County this year — he has eight convictions for
Reefer Madness The headline does most of the heavy lifting on this story: “Man Faces Pot (Charge After Gun Injures Truck.” The truck in question was shot at 7 a.m., and the bullet came from a muzzle loader that apparently went off in the passenger compartment, sending its projectile through some essential auto motive innards. When police arrived, they found a “fresh marijuana cigarette” in the snow next to the truck and more pot inside it. Police suspect the two men inside were hunting from the road, which was unsporting of them. Pot shots, indeed. — Stowe Reporter, December 14
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page 42
SEVEN DAYS
IN THE C U P S Curran Malhotra, right, and his brother Bruce of Vermont Tea and Trading Co., at a tea tasting at the M iddlebury Natural Foods Co-op
Still sipping English Breakfast? die-hard Brit samples the new brews
t’s a wicked day, with heavy rain, sleet, ice and flooding — a perfect afternoon for tea. On the counter, Curran and Bruce Malhotra have set up 11 china cups with individual lids and tea sieves, and 11 small bowls of loose tea. The kettles are on, and there’s already a strong smell of spices in the air — cardamom, especially, but also nutmeg and clove. Tea is becoming the wine of the 21st century. Whether it’s because a post-alcoholic America is looking for alternatives, or because the health benefits of tea are turn ing up in respectable medical jour nals (reduces the risk of heart attacks and certain cancers, increases fertility, alleviates dia betes), the nation is awakening to a panorama of tea beyond Lipton’s and Celestial Seasonings. Tea salons in New York now have their own sommeliers — the term used to describe wine waiters — to guide tea-drinkers through their menus. Which is probably just as well, as the choice is likely to include Pinhead Gunpowder, Pai Mu Tan, Grand Keemun and Sree Siban. Even an inveterate tea-drinker such as myself, long accustomed to the perfect balance of tastes be tween a fine Assam tea and a Kit Kat, has to admit to feeling a little out of my depth — which is why this foul December Sunday finds me in the Middlebury Natural Foods Co-op at a tea-tasting. The tasting has been set up by the Malhotra brothers, co-propri etors of the Vermont Tea and Trading Company of Middlebury, who have brought five chais, which they blend themselves, and six organic teas, which they import. The son of an Indian father and an American mother, Curran trained as a taster in India, and when he founded VT&T in 1995, his younger brother joined him. They began with just four teas that the American public was likely to recognize — an English Breakfast and Irish Breakfast, an Earl Grey and a Darjeeling — which they imported and sold to specialty food stores, co-ops and,
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Tea
By Tim Brookes
(802) 864-6811 or 1 800 642-3133 www.vermonttransit.com
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december 27, 2 0 0 0 & January 3, 2001
later, tea rooms throughout north ern New England. They climbed aboard the post-tea-bag-revolution with loose-leaf black and green teas, following the lead of giants such as The Republic of Tea and Stash. Now VT&T sells 65 teas, and they’re in the Co-op — which itself sells 37 bulk teas — to con tinue spreading the word. My wife Barbara has come along as my sniffer and taster. Her sense of smell is so acute that I once suggested she go with the U.N. team to sniff out biological warfare agents in Iraq. The foul weather has kept peo ple away, so we have the Molhatra brothers almost to ourselves. First we try Spring Green, a Chinese green tea in withered little graygreen-brown curls. “The Chinese have hundreds of names for green teas,” says Curran. “Some of them are very odd, like Monkey Paw or Spider Leg.” This is a pan-fired green, the term referring to how the leaf is dried and rolled, using a large piston and cylinder. Rolling pre serves the leaf’s freshness, but it can be rolled in various ways. Gun powder teas are rolled into little pel lets. When the hot water is added, the leaf unfolds. Green teas, by the way, are made from the same leaf as black teas; they’re just processed different-, ly. There are five stages to tea-leaf professing. First, they’re plucked. Then they’re withered — that is, dried. Next, they’re rolled with suf ficient force to break the cell walls, so the fluid in the cells is released. They’re then spread on tiles in a one- to two-inch layer to ferment. Green teas are unfermented, oolongs are semi-fermented, but black teas ferment for hours or even days. Finally, they’re fired in ovens to stop the fermentation and dry them, and then sorted accord ing to grade. We taste. Spring Green is a very light, subtle tea, with a distant echo of jasmine, I think. ( Very dis tant, as it contains none.) But a tea nonetheless, and an interesting one — a vast improvement over most Chinese restaurant green teas and oolongs, which always suggest to me the moisture wrung out from dishtowels.
Next is Koslande, an organic Broken Orange Pekoe from the Koslande estate Ceylon, in smaller leaf fragments, darker and brown er. Why broken? Most tea leaves are, in fact, broken so a greater percentage of the leaf is surface area that will be exposed to the water. “The smaller the leaf, the stronger the brew,” Curran explains. The smallest leaf fragments are called fannings, and are bought at auction for high-quality tea bags. Smaller particles are called tea dust, but even they are bought for low-end tea bags. “At the tea auc tions in Cochin and Calcutta they’ll sell seven or eight sizes of dust,” he explains. What makes one leaf more desirable than another? The soil, the altitude — higher is generally better — the pedigree of the bush. Some may be from new hybrid bushes, some may be from Chinese bushes a hundred years old. A fine estate tea may fetch as much as $200 a pound. This is more like it. Koslande is very tasty, mildly astringent, the perfect accompaniment for a Kit Kat. Barbara rolls it around her cup. “Look. It’s got the texture of coffee,” she says approvingly. Hibiscus Herbal is a series of variations on light green, and turns out to be surprisingly spicy, with lemongrass, clove, a tiny drop of oil of peppermint exploding late on the tongue. Curran has avoided selling herbal teas, partly because the Celestial Seasonings style of teas are not entirely authentic (nat ural non-tea flavors are added), partly because they’re frankly wimpy. Vermont Tea and Trading adds a small percentage of green tea to give them some body and breadth of taste. The English Breakfast, a blend of Assams, with the familiar tiny, dark, slightly twisted leaves, has the air of lying in wait. The chais may jump up and down like pup pies, nipping at our noses, but this one knows that sooner or later it will have us by the throat. Curran has made it stronger than he intended, and it is so smokily vig orous I’m a little afraid of it. Yet even at tea-zilla strength, it’s clearly
a good blend. Many teas come at you from one direction with just one loud flavor, biting into your tongue like a chainsaw. This attacks from all sides, and is different one second to the next. I normally hate Earl Grey, with its show-off, pinky-in-the-air floweriness, a Laura Ashley tea. The reason for this, Curran explains, is that most blenders use a cheap base, which lets the oil of bergamot shout it down. His is much richer and better balanced. Blue Mountain Estate Tea is a Nilgiri, meaning “Blue mountain,” from the organic Oothu Estate in Kerala, South India. Estate teas are like estate wines. While most com mercial teas are blends, estate teas will come from one plantation only, and as such will vary from year to year. An experienced taster, Curran says, will be able to tell not only the estate but the year. The Blue Mountain is very smooth and quite light. Chais and some black teas insist on being part of the conversation; this is a good background tea, a gentle prompt. Chocolate Chai is VT&T’s newest tea. Curran uses Ghirardelli cocoa, “but we tasted at least 20 different cocoas to see which was most compatible, which had the right alkaline content,” Bruce says. “A lot of the coffee shops we sell it to will froth it up like a latte.” But this is neither a trendy cof fee drink nor a sweet children’s drink. Bruce uses a base of black Assam tea, and as a result this is a rounder, more complex, more adult drink — no marshmallow swamp but something to take seri ously. Kashmiri Chai is the most aro matic so far. Cardamom, nutmeg, a little peppermint, black pepper and black tea, Bruce explains. “Wow,” says Barbara. She engages Bruce, who comes out from behind the counter, talking with his hands and eyes like a chef. They discuss cardamom enthusias tically while I eye a packet of shortbread, the thinking man’s Kit Kat. Neither of us cared much for the Decaf Chai, a blend of the cinnamon and cardamom chais, but the Tra Que Chai... “Ooo,” Barbara says, never lost for the right sound even when the right word hasn’t been coined. It is easily the most beautiful tea on display, granules in every shade of brown from tawny gold to ochre. Nutmeg, clove and Vietnamese cinnamon, which is known to have a hotter, sweeter flavor than other cinnamon, make this very smooth, very satisfying, with the same emotional gestalt as hot spiced cider but a more com plex taste. This and the Kashmiri chais are his best-sellers, Curran says. Finally, a Ginseng Chai, a Chinese green tea with ginger — a monastic drink, slightly ascetic, even with sweetener. Rain crashes against the glass door of the Co-op. Barbara heads off to buy the Kashmiri and Tra Que chais and decaf Earl Grey. Curran brews another cup of English Breakfast at a more mod erate octane, and before I know it I’m breaking open the packet of shortbread. (Z)
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classified@ sevendaysvt.com
classifieds ► E M PLO Y M E N T & B U S IN E S S OPP. LINE ADS: 5 0 0 a word. ► LEGALS: 3 0 0 a word. ► ALL OTHER LINE AD S: 2 5 w ords for*$7. Over 25: 3 0 0 a word. Discounts are available for long running ads and for national ads.
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Statewide disability rights organization is seeking an individual to a ssist Social Security beneficiaries with basic benefits planning and to help them access other services, provide technical assistance to providers, and provide outreach services. Familiarity with state and fed eral work incentive program s. Stron g com m unication and presentation skills needed. Personal experience
Group buys for display ads are available in other regional papers in Vermont. Call for more details. All ads must be prepaid. We take VISA, MASTERCARD and cash, of course.
Hudson Distributors ' is seeking a reliable independent worker to set up magazine displays in stores. Work Monday & Tuesday mornings in the Chittenden county area. Excellent wages, great part time position. Call 1-800-343-2340 ext. 324 or 802-888-8968.
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Adm issions Recruiter/Counselor Goddard College, a growing liberal arts institution located in central Vermont, seeks a creative, energetic, self-starter to be part of our dynamic Admissions team. This is an entrylevel position in recruiting and enrolling BA campus-based students. You will work as a liaison between the administration and faculty and the prospective students and their families. Occasional evening and weekend work required. Travel includes participation in college and high school fairs, as well as representing the College at state and national fairs. You will actively participate in planning admissions activities. The ideal candidate will have an undergraduate degree, at least one year of recruiting or related experience, and excellent interviewing and communications skills. Goddard offers excellent benefits and a tuition waiver pro gram. Please submit a resume with cover letter to: Goddard College, Human Resources Department, 123 Pitkin Road, Plainfield, VT 05667. Deadline: January 2, 2001.
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page 4 4
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december 27, 2 0 0 0 & january 3, 2001
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LEADERS WANTED International marketing group expanding in the northeast seeking someone with experience in teaching, public speaking, or who has owned or operated a business. 888-472-0157 ext.83.
BREAKFAST COOK starting mid-January at two of Burlington’s historic inns. 4 days per week 6am-2pm. Call 651-8710 to set up an interview.
We are actively seeking a dynam ic designer w ith a passion for flow ers and flo ral design. Essential is a commitment to exquisite custom er service and a m inim um of three years of design experience in a retail setting.
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H elp Us M ake a D ifference in the Com m unity.
The Community Health Center is a unique and mission driven family practice serving 8,000 Vermonters every year. Our busy family practice is in need of a Patient Services Representative to check-in patients, problem-solve and provide great patient office support. We offer very com petitive pay, benefits and vacation time and never a dull moment on the job. Send your resume to: Human Resources, CHCB, 617 Riverside Avenue, Suite 200, Burlington, VT 05401. Bilingual applicants encouraged to apply. EOE
iurlington, V T 0 5 4 0 3
350 D O R S E T STREET, S O U T H B U R L IN G T O N , V T 0 5 4 0 3 L O R I E. R O W E , P R O P R IE T O R . 8 6 3 -2 3 0 0
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Burlington law firm seeks an energetic individual with legal experience. Word processing, transcription, organization and communication skills required. Competitive salary, health insurance, 401k plan, and parking provided. Send resume and cover letter to Bauer, Anderson & Gravel, PO Box 607, Burlington, VT 05402; or fax to 864-7779. B a u e r, A n d e rso n
The
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&
Part time, flexible hours. Apply in person Four Star Delivery 20 3 No. W inooski Ave.
B urling ton
8 6 5 -3 6 6 3
W e are looking for several talented individuals to join UVM's Digital Media Development Lab online course development team. The ideal candidate needs solid HTML skills, graphic sensibility, experience with Photoshop and Image Ready. W e
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Person needed to assist Community Relations and Development Director to significantly increase major fundraising activities, volunteerism and special events. Responsibilities include database management, volunteer coordination and recruitment, Board of Directors support, special events management and assisting in fund development activities. Ideal candi date will have superior communication skills, excel lent organizational skills and attention to detail, proficiency in Microsoft Office and at least two years previous experience in fundraising or volunteer and special event coordination.
Apply after 5pm at Trattoria Delia, 152 St Paul St. 864-5253.
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SEVEN DAYS
.
aesthetician to join our team. We offer: • competitive pay scale • a great work environment • continuing education • benefits package If you are looking to increase your clientele (or start one), come check us out and introduce yourself. 12D Main St.
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N U R SES! Porter Medical Center may be able to provide you with the unique work setting you’ve been looking for!
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We have current openings for RNs and LPNs in Med. Surg., and are seeking an RN with OR experience.
The Urban Salon Team is seeking a motivated and energetic esthetician to be part of our team. Education package and great work environment. Stop by or call Christopher or Stacey.
are looking for someone with strong web research skills and the ablility to work with UVM faculty members as they put their
C o m m u n ity H ealth Canter o f Burlington
Restaurant full time waitperson. Professional, expe rienced individual. Possessing enthusi asm and knowl edge of fine wine & food.
The Community Health Center of Burlington is a not-for-profit organization providing outstanding health and human services to uninsured, underin sured, homeless and low-income Vermonters.
G ra ve l
ONLINE COURSE DEVELOPMENT — Support Role
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Legal Secretary
.A ll Saint’s.Episcopal Church
' F L O T E R I
Patient S ervices R epresentative Are you skilled communicating with people from all walks of life? D o you thrive in a busy, challenging environment? D o you have excellent computer skills and multi-task smoothly under pressure? I f you answered "yes ", and have some prior offce based work experience, then we have a greatjob for you.
r g a n is t - C h o ir m a s t e r
All Saints Episcopal Church seeks organist-choirmaster for Sunday worship (10 am) and occasional other services such as Holy Week, Easter, Christmas, weddings and funerals. Hours, including staff meetings, are between 6-8 per week. Job requirements: organ skills, training and conducting choirs (adult, folk mass group and possile childrens’ choir), coordi nating volunteer musicians. Competitive salary is negotiable based on expereience; wedding and funeral fees are extra.
We also have full- and part-time office nurse positions in our practices. We offer excellent pay and benefits for full time and most part-time positions. For more information, please call Human Resources at 802-388-4780. 115 Porter Drive Middlebury, VT 05753 Fax 802-388-8899 Email ylsl23@sover.net
120 Main St. 802-862-1670
For more information, please call Howard Davis, 656-0379 or email your resume to howard.davis@uvm.edu
7D classifieds [Where the Good Jcibs Are] december 27, 2000
3,2001
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The New North End Youth Center is looking for a mature, responsible, creative and energetic team player to join our staff. Position requires work ing with adolescents in our drop in center afternoons and evenings. Previous experience preferred w ork-~ ing with this population, and a back ground in social work or education. Pay based on experience. Send resume and cover letter to: NNEYC, 130 Gosse Court, Burlington, VT 05401.
We are looking for experienced and dynamic people to fill tke following FU LL -T IM E & PA RT-TIM E positions at our kealtk food market
M A K E A D IF F E R E N C E I N LIVES O F T O D A Y 'S Y O U T H ! Northlands Job Corps Center is a residential vocational training program serving youth ages 16-24 throughout N ew England. As a member of Northlands’ staff you would be helping disadvantaged young people break the cycle of poverty by preparing
fu ll-tim e
them fo r gainful, entry-level employm ent Northlands Job Corps Center offers a gen erous benefits and compensation package. For more information about us check
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out o u r Web site at wwwcareersystems com
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N o r t h la n d s is p re se n tly se e k in g c a n d id a te s fo r th e fo llo w in g p o sitio n s:
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R e s id e n tia l A d v is o r: Full-time and substitute positions supervising students in dorm itories during leisure tim e hours. Must have diplom a/GED and the com m itm ent to making positive and dramatic changes in the lives o f youth. $8.90/hr+. S e c u rity O ffic e r: Responsible for enforcing all laws, rules, and policies authorized by the Security D e p a rtm e n t D iplom a/G E D required, experience working with youth preferred. A.
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H u m a n R esou rces A ssista n t: Adm inistrative/derical posi tion. Responsible fo r various H R duties. Must be proficient w ith w o rd processing and spreadsheet software applications. Basic knowledge of EEO and A AP required. HS diploma o r G E D plus one year administrative experience. Previous H R experience high ly preferred
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C o m m u n ity H o alth Canter o f Burlington
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NATURAL FOODS MARKET
The Community Health Center of Burlington is a federally qualified family practice dedicated to serve uninsured, underinsured, homeless and low income Vermonters. We need a committed person to help us conduct outreach activities and eligibility assessments designed to help families access health care. Ideal can didate would be a great communicator with people from all walks of life, have good presentation skills and attention to detail. In return, we can offer a one year community service and work experience in an incredi bly diverse, unique and growing medical practice.
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286 College St. Attn: Paul Songer 05401 865-4480 Fax: 865-3364
Burlington, VT
Promise Fellow is a nationally funded, special Americorps VISTA program. 12 months of commu nity commitment pays $13,000 plus an educational stipend of $4,725. If you would like to contribute to the quality of life in Burlington, send your resume to CHCB, 617 Riverside Avenue, Suite 200, Burlington VT 05401. Fax 802-860-4324
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mployee-owned G a rd e n e r's S u p p ly C o m p a n y , America's leading catalog and web-based gardening company is looking for a dynamic E individual to lead our fast-paced network team. The Network Manager will supervise and guide the activities of a team of network professionals, establish team priorities, manage complex projects and help-desk activities, and make recommendations to m anagement about the well being of our network. Responsibilities include oversight of help-desk activities, server and desktop platforms, voice and data network infrastructure and related hardware and software. Our network includes UNIX and Windows-based platforms from leading vendors Microsoft and Compaq and network hardware from Cisco, 3COM, Adtran and Nortel. Candidates must have 3+ years experience supervising technical personnel in a fast-paced business environm ent. Leadership skills, a team orientation and the desire to have and create fun are essential. Superior technical skills with Windows, UNIX, and/or TCP/IP internet working are required. Voice networking (Nortel) and e-commerce experience is highly desirable. MCSE and/or CCNE certification is a definite plus. I f you are interested in this exciting opportunity, send resume with cover letter to Deirdre:
128 Intervale Road, Burlington, VT 05401 or via e-mail: deirdreg@gardeners.com
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GUYS, DO YOU DRIVE A GIRL C A R ? READ ON. D ear Tom a n d Ray: I recently helped m y son buy his fir s t car, a 1991 Toyota Camry. Lately, it seems I can't go anywhere w ith o u t seeing these cars, so I thought th a t was a pretty good selling p oint. Anyway, when I to ld a guy I work w ith w hat car m y son bought, he nodded know ingly a n d said, "Great car, b u t it's a g irl car. " I know men are m uch more hung up on those kinds o f things than women are, n ot ju st w ith their cars, b u t in every th in g they do, say, wear, eat, you nam e it! God fo rb id a guy should drive a g irl car! So I ask you, since my son has obviously flu b b ed th a t one, w hat are the criteria by which one can dis tinguish a g irl car? A n d w hile we 're on the subject, w hat other things should my son know about this stuff? — Amy TOM : Amy, you have launched us on another Ph.D.
dissertation! We were so fasci nated by your question that we asked our Web site visitors for help. We asked them to tell us which cars they perceive as "chick cars" — and which cars they see as "guy cars." RAY: And the results are in. At least according to this lim ited study, the vast majority o f cars fall into the middle, being neither chick cars nor guy cars. Since there's no obvious anatomical/mechanical way to tell a chick car from a guy car, people tend to make their own assumptions about these cars in the middle. TOM : That appears to be the case with your Camry, Amy. Often, the "chick car" desig nation is used by one guy to insult another. RAY: Here are the top five chick cars, according to people who visit the Car Talk section o f www.cars.com, along with selected comments from the nominators: 5. Dodge N eon — "Neons are Barbie cars." 4. V W Jetta — "Anything by Volkswagen is a chick car. VW
realized this years ago and joined forces with another company to sell guy cars, they called that company Porsche." 3. Mazda Miata — "I discov ered this phenomenon when I got a Miata. “Girlie car.” That’s all I heard." 2. VW Cabriolet — “All teen age girls classify them as cute. ’N u ff said.” 1. VW N ew Beetle — “A chick car, definitely. I know o f no other automobile with a FLOWER VASE as standard equipment.” TOM : And the top five guy cars according to the survey are: 5. Dodge Viper — ”It might be a guy car if there were a movie or TV show built entirely around it, example: Burt Reynolds' Trans Am from “Smokey and the Bandit,” 4. Ford F-150 Pickup — “Any car with numbers or letters for a name, or tacked on the end, can become a guy car. ” 3. Chevy Camaro — “ Used to show other guys how manly you really are.” 2. Chevy Corvette — “I believe the main aspect that determines the male/female state o f a car is based on the engine-compartment (hood)-
to-cab-length ratio. A car such as a pickup or Corvette has a large hood-to-cab-length ratio.” 1. Ford Mustang — "A back seat guaranteed to be too small for your mother-in-law.” Got a question about cars? W rite to Click a n d Clack in care o f this newspaper, or e-m ail them by visiting the Car Talk section ofcars.com on the W orld W ide Web.
the Bible-study group. Nowadays you can get guaranteedauthentic voodoo paraphernalia from a host of entrepre neurs, many of them online. Trouble is — trouble from my standpoint, anyway — evidence suggests voodoo real ly may work given the right circumstances. The medical literature includes several accounts of “voodoo deaths,” that is, people in seemingly good health, or at least not fatally ill, who died after being placed under some kind of hex. None of the accounts 1 saw specifically credited voodoo dolls, but it seems clear the essential ingredient isn’t a particular methodology or technique, such as obtaining a lock of the guys hair. Rather, the victim must believe wholeheartedly in the mystic power of whatever juju you’re attempting to put over on him, and so must everyone, without exception, in his social milieu. Call me cynical, but I don’t see how you’re going to pull this off with a voodoo doll kit you got on the Internet for $19.95. 1 Voodoo death is the ultimate example of the nocebo effect (the opposite of the placebo effect): Because you believe something can harm you, it does. Mainstream sci ence remains skeptical that the nocebo effect can actually kill you, but one doctor (C.K. Meador, Southern Medical Journal, 1992) recounts two.interesting cases. In the first, a poorly educated man was near death after being hexed J 'T :'r~ y : ~ / 7 by a local voodoo priest, but recovered after his quick Dear Cecil, thinking physician performed a convincing (although How would I go about making a voodoo doll so I can completely nonsensical) counterritual in which he seemed torture my enemies? — Redwing to cause the victim to vomit up a lizard. In the second case, a cancer patient was told that the disease had metastasized to his liver and he had only a For the past month I ’ve been making voodoo dolls of this short time to live. The despairing victim died a few one jerk from school. I heard that if you have a piece of hair from the person, the voodoo doll will work. Someone also told months later, but an autopsy revealed that the diagnosis had been mistaken: He had only a 2 centimeter nodule me that you need one of their personal belongingsfor it to on his liver, not normally a tumor of lethal size. work. What do I do to make it really work? Conclusion #1: He died not his cancer but from fear. — Akira Konya Conclusion #2: If you really want to scare somebody to death, forget the local hoodoo artist and bring in an M.D. Voodoo dolls, eh? Well, I guess it beats shooting up
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Carpool Connection 864-CCTA Call to respond to a listing or to be listed.
S. BURLINGTON TO S. BURLINGTON: I am looking for a ride from Shelburne Rd. to the University Mall. I work Monday through Sunday and would like a ride anytime between 8 a.m. and 11p.m. (40063) COLCHESTER to IBM: I need a round-trip ride from Colchester to Essex Jet., M-F, 8 am4:30 pm. (40050) WATERBURY to IBM : I need a round-trip ride from Waterbury to Essex Jet. I work from 7 am-7 pm. (40051) RICHMOND P&R to ST. MICHAEL’S COLL. I am hoping to share driving on my com mute to work, my hours are 7:15 am-5 pm, M-Th. (3271) ENOSBURG FALLS to ESSEX JCT. I work at IBM from 7 pm to 7 am. Wed.-Sat.(40027)
WINOOSKI to FAIRFIELD INN. need a ride from Maple St. in Winooski to the Fairfield Inn. I work Tu., Th. & Sat. at 8 am. (40055) ST. ALBANS to ESSEX I need a ride to IBM. I need to be to work between 7:30 am & 9:30 am. (40056) MORRISVILLE to ESSEX. I need a ride to IBM. I work from 7 pm-7 am. (40057) BURL, to S. BURL. I need a ride to Sears at the University Mall. I work Sun.-Sat. from 6 am-2 pm. (40058) WATERBURY to MONTPELIER. My hours are 7 am-3 pm. I am flexible & looking for a ride M-F. (40045) ESSEX to ESSEX: I need a ride to IBM. I work the N8 shift. (40030)
BURLINGTON to ESSEX JCT. I am look ing for a ride to IBM from S. Burlington. I work M-F, 8 am-4:30 pm. (40038) JOHNSON to STOWE. I am looking for a ride from Johnson to Stowe. I work M-F, 7 am-3:30 pm. (40026) WINOOSKI to MORRISVILLE: I am looking for a ride. I work Tues., Weds. & Fri. from 8 am to 3 pm. (40029) CABOT to WILLISTON: I am looking for a ride or to share driving from the Cabot/ Montpelier area. I work 20 hrs./wk. & am very flexible. (40034)
V A N P 0 0 L R ID E R S W ANTED * rn: Burlington & Richmond Commuter Lot To: Montpelier hly Fare: $851 Work Hours: 7:30 to 4.25 p.m.
Hm, you’re thinking dejectedly, guess we’re back to shooting up the Bible-study group. No, no, that’s not what I meant to suggest at all. We merely need to under stand the limits of voodoo in this day and age. (And yes, I realize that voodoo, properly speaking, is a religion, and that rituals involving dolls and whatnot are merely among its tawdrier manifestations. Listen, we’re talking about high-school revenge fantasies here, not metaphysics.) Sudden death, mysterious crippling ailments? Probably not gonna happen, as a result of voodoo anyway. (The cafeteria is another story.) Creep out your enemies? Sure. Let’s see what we can find on the Internet. Here’s one from Phoenix One Enterprises. “Voodoo Doll. Important: This is not a toy. You must be 18 years of age or older to purchase this voodoo doll kit.” Well, maybe you can get a fake ID. The kit includes “doll with the same skin color, sex and hair color as your target,” 10 “special power nee dles,” a ritual spirit candle and complete instructions. All you need to do is send $34.95 plus $10 shipping and handling to — wait a second! No disrespect, but I refuse to believe that a truly potent voodoo doll can be had from an enterprise located in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Ah, here’s an outfit called voodooking.com in Metairie, Louisiana — close to New Orleans, which is the center of modern commercial voodoo, and once the stomping grounds, so to speak, of former Ku Klux Klan leader David Duke (truly a combination to instill the fear of God). Voodooking voodoo dolls, it says here, are “the Perfect Antidote for ALL High-Quality Gift Ideas!” Couldn’t have said it better myself. Let’s see, we’ve got the Rope Doll, the Palmetto Doll and... goodness, the Vagina Doll. “Once you activate the effective Vagina Doll you will have to cope with a wild woman! In our humble opinion this can be very beneficial. Warning: Be sure you have plenty of rest and have eaten all your vegetables prior to activating this remarkable doll.” And make sure you’ve got an ample supply of Viagra, too. — CECIL ADAMS
Is there something you need to get straight? Cecil Adams can deliver the Straight Dope on any topic. Write Cecil Adams at the Chicago Reader, 11 E. Illinois, Chicago, IL 60611 , or e-mail him at cecil@ chireader.com.
7D classifieds ► 864.5684 ► classified@sevendaysvt.com A ’N**
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MUSIC CONTACT INTERNATIONAL, an international tour company specializing in worldwide choir tours and festivals, seeks s A s s is ta n t Tour C o o rd in a to r Assist in all facets of to u r planning. Knowledge o f Europe, Word & Excel req., 2nd language preferred. Creative flexible person w / proven organization & communication skills in travel or a sim ilar service industry.
Immediate Opportunities. | r i p || H i ilii.
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Send le tte r & resume tor Music Contact Inernational 119 So. Winooski Ave. B urlington, VT 05401 • Fax: 862.2251
NORTHEASTERN FAMILY INSTITUTE NFI, an expanding statewide m ental health treatm ent system fo r children, adolescents and fam ilies, is seeking to fill the follow in g positions:
Data Entry Coordinator Associates degree in computer sciences, IT or related field preferred. Experience w ith CSM program and busi ness data entry a plus. Successful candidate w ill be able to work independently in fast paced environment with competing priorities. Attention to detail and deadlines extremely important. Position is full time with com peti tive benefit and salary package and is located in Williston, VT. Contact Chris M obley at 802-878-05390 ext.16 or fax cover letter and resume to 802-879-6197.
manifest destiny.
► employment CATHEDRAL SQUARE Corporation, a Burlington non p ro fit th a t develops, owns and manages affordable housing in Vermont, has two job open ings. HOUSING DEVELOPER: This fu ll-tim e position w ill be part of a development team th a t develops service enriched housing options for low income elders and special needs populations. The ideal candidate w ill possess: strong financial and com puter skills, an a b ility to manage and track several projects at once, and excellent com m unication skills. Real estate develop m ent or knowledge of con struction is preferred. RESIDENT SERVICES COOR DINATOR: 2 0 -4 0 hrs/week position coordinating services for residents of CSC affordable housing projects. The ideal candidate has experience working in social services or related fie ld , and should be flexible and energetic. Experience working w ith elders or special needs populations is preferred. Please send resume to Development Director, Cathedral Square Corporation, 3 Cathedral Square, Burlington, VT 0 5 4 0 1 by January 8 , 2 0 0 1 . Excellent benefit packages included. Salary commensurate with experience. E0E FITNESS Experienced Personal Trainer needed for downtown health club on the W aterfront. Established clientele/great atmosphere. Call Charlene, 8 6 4 -2 3 4 8 . GROCERY/DELI. Part-time, very flexible hours, prep work. Ideal for retired person or housewife. Call 8 6 3 -9 1 0 5 .
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►employment ►automotive ►space for rent INTERNET & DATABASE Developers. Excellent salary, bonuses, benefits & work envi ronment. 6 Degrees Software,176 Battery St., Burlington, VT 0 5 4 0 1 . www.6 degrees.com
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ing an enthusiastic, goodhumored, strong and responsi ble individual to wear many hats. Plus or m inus fu ll tim e flex tim e possible. Competitive wages. Some experience with retail, construction and/or antiques preferred. Mail resume and letter of interest to 11 Maple St., Essex Jet., VT 0 5 4 5 2 .
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g lu tin o u s g lo p in y o u r g a llig a s k in s
But, sir. J ’m pretty sure I just heard you call my name over the intercom system.
Hello, chief. You wanted to see me?
Human Resources 1100 Mountain View Drive Colchester, VT 05446 Fax (802) 654-5148 Sarahmn@rccw.com
—
from the secret files of m q x ca n n o n Let’s not play games. If this is about the mound of raw sewage in your parking space, ’m willing to take full responsibility for it.
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don’t know what you’re talking about. I didn’t see any sewage in my space.
“The Best Place for the Best People to Work. ”
1R U R A L C T T L L U I A * C O R P O R A T I O N
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7D classifieds ► 864.5684 ► classified@sevendaysvt.com MIDDLEBURY: Commercial rentals. 1-3 small buildings, 13-15 Washington St., across from Grand Union. W ill reno vate or restore for your store, office or business. 4 2 5 -5 0 0 0 . WINOOSKI: Beautiful, fu r nished, corner, psychotherapy office. Avail Tues.-Fri. Includes nice w aiting room, parking & free pool usage! Only $ 250/m o. Call Steve, 9 8 5 -8 8 9 4 .
►housing for rent BURLINGTON: 2 Bedroom. $800/m o., includes heat. Near Church & King. No dogs. Newly renovated. Avail. Jan. 1. Deposit required. Call 6 6 0 4347.
►housemates BURLINGTON: GWM seeks prof., male, roommate, m ust be clean, quiet, non-smoker, non-drinker, must like dogs, spacious apt., $ 425/m o. + dep., low utils., contact Tim at 8 6 4 -7 1 8 7 . BURLINGTON: Mature person wanted in quiet 2 bedroom. Awesome apt. in great loca tion. $425/m o. Includes heat, hot water and off-street park ing. Call 6 6 0 -9 8 3 3 or dougybuddy@yahoo.com. BURLINGTON: Prof. F seeks prof, or grad student, M or F, NS, to share great 2 bdrm. apt. in So. End. Dead-end street, nearby park, 2 nd floor. $365/m o. incl. heat & water. 8 6 4 -3 0 9 8 S. BURLINGTON: Avail. 12/16 or 1/1. Room in nice condo near U-mall to share with quiet, laid-back m edita tor. Musicians welcome, w/d. $380/m o. + 1/2 utils. 2 8 3 -4 3 3 3 SO. BURLINGTON: Give your self a g ift. Extra-large unfur nished room in owner occu pied 3-level townhouse. $ 480/m o. includes utils, look ing for non-smoking, mature, upbeat woman to enjoy space with teacher and one cat who refuses to live w ith another pet. Pool, tennis, bike path, trail through woods. Avail, immediately. Call 8 6 3 -9 5 9 2 .
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december 27, 2 0 0 0 & january 3, 2001
SEVEN DAYS
page 51
jC'-
Dec. 28 - lan. 3
logy
ARIES*(Mar. 21-Apr. 19): The renowned Spanish painter Francisco Goya (1746-1828) had two different careers. In the first, he produced skillful but tame portraits and pas torals. Sweetness and light were his specialties. Following a healing crisis at age 46, however, he mutated into a searing satirist, painting scenes that ridiculed a corrupt elite and raged against the nightmares o f routine human cruelty. M ost critics agree he was competent during the first phase but brilliant during the second. I would like to offer up Goya, an Aries like you, as your patron saint for the year 2001. W ith the energizing planet Mars lighting up your astrological House o f Frontiers for an unprece dented six-and-a-half months, you are well-primed for a previously unimag inable breakthrough.
TAURUS
(April 20-M ay 20): In his book, Letter to S a in t A ugustine, Haniel Long muses about the lingering traces o f old wounds. H e writes that when his friend was a boy, “he caught a carp embedded in which were the talons o f an osprey. Apparently years before, the hawk had dived for its prey, but misjudged its size. The carp was too heavy to lift out o f the water, and the bird o f prey was pulled under and drowned. The fish then lived as best it could with the great bird clamped to it, till time disintegrated the carcass, and freed it, all but the bony structure o f the talon.” I offer this story as a talismanic meditation for the new year, Taurus. Like the carp, you still carry the remnants o f an old attack. Unlike the carp, you now have the means to rid yourself forever o f those remnants.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): The expansive planet Jupiter will be hanging out in your astrological House o f Beginnings from now until next July. The last time it paid an extended visit here was in 1989. D o you recall the new trends you tried to
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------------------------------------------ .------------- r---------launch back then? I would bet that one o f those fresh starts got aborted but is primed to be resurrected in the coming months. W hat did you not quite have the gumption to pull off 12 years ago, but are ready to do now?
CANCER
(June 21-July 22): Was last year’s Y2K scare just a rehearsal for the real beginning o f the millennium? Will humanity soon be blindsided by a global catastrophe that’ll return us to the Stone Age? Should we fear the arrival o f the Antichrist and a climactic battle between good and evil? Nah. Those scenarios are red herrings that distract us from less sexy but more authentic dangers, like the degradation o f the environment and the growing con centration o f wealth and power in the hands o f ultra-selfish old white guys. W hat problems do you consider the biggest threat to our collective well being, Cancer? The coming months will be a rewarding time to rethink the relationship between your person al life and the great web o f life.
LEO
(July 23-Aug. 22): I recom mend that you begin the new year by casting a love spell on yourself. Formulate it in such a way that it will start slowly, build in intensity throughout the winter and spring, then climax next summer. There’s no use turning to professionals like me for help in conjuring this abra cadabra, by the way; in 2001, no one can match your power to conjure up romantic mojo. I hesitate even to offer suggestions, seeing as how you’re the intuitive genius in this matter. However, I will state my belief that the best way to launch the process is to exorcise every last ghost that’s still haunting your love life. I also advise you to use the following magic words
in your incantations: murmur, sim mer, teeming, thrive, delight.
VIRGO
(Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The mountain wouldn’t come to you this past year. It did not develop the power to migrate over to where you were, tilt down its craggy peak, and lift you up to the lofty heights. So what are you going to do? Cry and stomp your feet? Give up and sulk, convinced that life is conspiring against you? Personally, I don’t think that’s the right conclusion to draw. In my astrological opinion, you should stop waiting for the majestic moun tain to do the impossible. Go to it, Virgo. Talk to it, sing to it, argue with it — and then climb that sucker with all your might.
LIBRA
(Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Let’s explore the etymology o f the word “nice.” It’s derived from the Latin word nescius, or “ignorant,” from nescire, “not to know.” In fourteenthcentury England it was a synonym for “foolish” or “wanton.” Nowadays it has a pretty positive, if bland, mean ing. I would like to propose, however, that we begin to reassert its darker sense, at least when applied to you Librans. For you, “nice” can unfortu nately be a code word for being overly polite, too willing to please, and easy to take advantage of. In fact, here’s my vow: In 2001, I’ll make it my personal goal to strip you o f the curse o f being “nice.” Your Official Word o f the Year will be “feisty.”
SCORPIO
(Oct. 23-Nov. 21): A baby girl is born with all the ova she will ever have. They don’t begin to do what they were made for, however, until she reaches sexual maturity many years later. I believe there’s a similarity between this phe nomenon and a development you’ll
mm experience in 2001, Scorpio. At the moment o f your conception in your mother’s womb, you were bequeathed a certain talent that has always lain dormant. Soon it will finally be ready for you to access and express. W hat is it? For clues, watch your dreams care fully this week.
SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 22-D ec. 21): Most mythic traditions feature a trickster. Both wise and stu pid, he is a messy character who can change genders at will. The trickster is renowned for playing pranks on everyone (especially himself), farting at solemn rituals that he him self is conducting, and vacillating between benevolent acts o f high magic and nonsensical acts that drive everyone crazy. Keep this in mind, Sagittarius, as you read my prescription for your inner child in 2001, courtesy o f psy chologist Clarissa Pinkola Estes. “People ask me what to do to help children retain their creative center. And I say let them have experiences that are not totally cleaned up, that are not flattened out. Let them have experiences where spirit can enter — where the trickster can enter.”
CAPRICORN
(Dec. 22Jan. 19): One thread o f your destiny in 2001 will resemble the following scenario: You come into a crowded place to do some business but have to take a number in order to be waited on. To your dismay, you get 111 and they have just called out number 32. It means 78 people will have their turn before you. Except that just as you’ve settled in for a long, boring vigil, a fluke occurs. The number called out after 39 is yours: 111. Perhaps it’s a mistake, but so what? Your number has popped up long before you thought it would. Be primed and ready, Capricorn.
QUARIUS
(Jan. ?0-Feb. 18): As I meditated on pour astrological aspects for the Scorning year, I kept returning to the German word, “Sonntagsfruhmorgenglockenschall.” It’s a fullyloaded, heavy-duty way to say, “the sound o f bells heard on an early Sunday morning.” I believe you will embody a similar contradiction in 2001, Aquarius: fresh and bright and buoyant, yet also intense and compli cated and weighty. This promises to be, by the way, an excellent formula for pushing your ambitions to a new levels o f success.
PISCES
(Feb. 19-Mar. 20): “I always turn to the sports page first,” said Earl Warren, C hief Justice o f the U.S. Supreme Court from 1953 to 1969. “It records people’s accomplishments; the front page, nothing but man’s failure.” It’s in this spirit, Pisces, that I’ll work to make your horoscopes like the sports page in 2001. As I relentlessly brainwash you with reports o f what you’re doing right, maybe you’ll come to regard your life as a raging success story. The astrological signs are promising: The energizing planet Mars will be in your House o f Self-Command for more than six o f the next eight months. N ow please imagine yourself picking up a newspaper next September. Open it to the third sec tion and read this headline: “[Your Name Here] Comes from Behind to Snag Intriguing Triumph.” ®
You can call Rob Brozsny, day or night for your e x p a n d e d w e e k ly h o r o s c o p e 1 -9 0 0 -9 0 3 -2 5 0 0 $1.00 per minute. 18 and over. Touchtone phone, c/s 8 1 8/3 7 3 -0 7 8 0 And don’t forget to check out Rob’s Web site at i v t v w . fre e uvlllastrology. com
Updated Tuesday night.
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last week’s answers on pa£»§ 50 ACROSS 1 “— it th e truth?” 5 R estrain 1 0 C onduit fittings 1 4 A ctive volcano 1 8 “T h e G re e n — " (’5 6 hit) 1 9 V ictorian o rn a m e n t 2 0 R a c h e l’s sister 21 T V ’s The W onder — ” 2 3 G uns n’ R o s es hit 2 6 — nous 2 7 S o p ra n o G luck 2 8 “— a d a y ’s w o rk” 2 9 Sleuth N ancy 31 H e rrim a n ’s “K ra zy — ” 3 2 M ythical m o n s te r 3 4 In flight 3 7 A djective suffix 3 8 O n e of T h e T h re e ” T eno rs” 4 3 R o c k ’s — & th e G a n g 4 4 P in e 4 6 Kim ono cum merbund 4 7 In terro g ates 4 9 C ra n n y ’s c o m panio n 51 T o o m ey or Philbin
5 4 R o se N ylu n d ’s p o rtrayer 5 8 O kefenokee, for one 61. Skin problem 6 2 Irwin of T h e Crocodile Hunter" 6 3 ’7 8 P e a ce N obelist 6 5 Pestiferous person 6 7 U n m atc h e d 6 8 W e n t like h o tcakes 71 A p p re h e n d 7 2 C u m in or c o ria n d e r 7 3 S tretch th e truth 7 4 H ealth concern 7 7 Billy R o s e song 8 0 O rg a n of equilibrium 81 P oetic pot 8 2 R e fe re n c e volu m e 8 3 Patriotic org. 8 4 P re p a re p ru n es 8 6 B a r supply 8 7 Linguist • C h o m s ky 8 8 Scope 9 0 U n b ro ken 9 4 “D ivine C om edy” fig ure 9 6 C aro lin e , to Ted
9 8 T h e N am e of the R ose” author 101 S e n d the m oney 1 0 3 S a lt servin g 1 0 5 — Alto, C A 1 0 6 D o v er’s st. 1 0 7 Fight site 1 1 0 T e m p o ra ry w ealth ? 1 1 2 B utcher’s offering 1 1 5 T h e — and I" (’4 7 film ) 1 1 7 “Fait — ” 1 1 9 E nd ing for “a uction” 1 2 0 Sought office 121 P enny or p e s e ta 1 2 2 W ro n g 1 2 6 A rchitect S a a rin e n 1 2 9 C o n d u cto r Seiji 131 R o se M c G o w an m ovie 1 36 M urcia mister 1 3 7 T ake — the chin 1 3 8 S prin g for 1 3 9 A ctress W a rd 1 4 0 Live on lettuce 141 B e a n on th e bean 1 4 2 H o p e ’s T h e P ris o n e r of —" 1 4 3 N orth C aro lin a c am p u s
DOWN 1 P itches 2 W h e re th e tall corn grow s 3 G a lla g h e r of O a s is 4 A ftershock 5 N ew D eal agey. 6 “V ery funny!” 7 R u n n er Z a to p e k 8 R o o m w ith out a view ? 9 A laskan bear 10 Shady c h aracter? 11 W a h in e ’s w reath 12 Jo e of “Dr. Q u in n ” 1 3 ’6 2 Four S e a s o n s hit 1 4 G la s s e s 1 5 D re s s size 1 6 “Ram blin’ R ose” singer 1 7 S ta g e b ackdrop 2 2 C lo c k m a k e r Thom as 2 4 G ro c e r’s m ea s u re 2 5 T earjerker? 3 0 V a n e letters 3 3 G u llet 3 5 Perch 3 6 R un through 3 8 M a le sw ans 3 9 H elp a hood 4 0 Fo rm al c ere m o n y 41 — blond
4 2 G o e s d o w n 9 2 S u m m e r hill fast? tim e treats 4 5 S te p h e n of 9 3 L a m eb ra in “In terview 9 5 Russian w ith th e space station V a m p ire ” 9 7 Tranquil 4 8 L o ses a lap 9 9 Lilly of 5 0 Phi B e ta — p h a rm a c e u 5 2 7 9 D o w n ’s ticals h o m e la n d 1 0 0 M orning 5 3 P a s so ve r w ear m ea l 1 0 2 4 p.m . 5 5 W a tchin g veh icle? m ach in es? 1 0 4 M uslim 5 6 P etty officer d ieta ry term 5 7 D a iry -c a s e 1 0 8 S gt. or cpI. p u rc h a s e 1 0 9 Like lem ons 5 9 “U pstairs, 111 W W II D o w n sta irs ” adm iral extras 1 1 3 S h o rte n a 6 0 O rn a m e n ta l sail 1 1 4 Th re a t words loop 6 4 G u lf 1 1 5 D es ire 6 6 M o st revolu d eified tio nary 1 1 6 Looked 6 9 D ivulg e longingly 7 0 — Lam a 118 — a 7 2 C ocktail cu sto m er in gred ient 1 2 3 C o n cern in g 7 4 It m akes 1 2 4 Lightw eight candy dandy gun 7 5 A u sten title 1 2 5 L a rg e start herring 7 6 T h e R ose 1 2 7 W hirl Tattoo” 1 2 8 C hristiania, actress today 7 8 C h ris ten ed 1 3 0 Affliction 7 9 “E le p h an t 1 32 W olfram — Boy” star Eschenbach 8 5 W in e an d 1 3 3 S q u id ’s squirt dine 8 8 M o ral m an ? 1 3 4 “W ings" 8 9 S to w e sight abbr. 91 A sw an w a s 1 3 5 S o lo of h e r sw ain “S ta r W a rs ”
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Anyone seeking a | healthy, non-abusive relationship may advertise in PERSON TO PERSON. Ad suggestions: age range, interests, | lifestyle, self-description. Abbreviations may be used to indicate | gender, race, religion and sexual preference. SEVEN DAYS reserves the right to edit or reject any advertisement. Personal ads may be submitted ■ for publication only by, and seeking, persons over 18 years of age. A=Asian, B=Black, Bi=Bisexual, C=Christian, CU=Couple, D=Divorced, F=Female, G=Gay, H= Hispanic, ISO=ln Search Of, j=)ewish, LTR=Long-Term Relationship M=Male, Ma=Married, ND=No Drugs, NS=Non-Smoking, NA=No Al cohol, P=Professional, S=Single, TS=Transsexual, W=White, Wi=Widowed, YO=Years Old
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HAVE DUCT TAPE- WILL TRAVEL Incendiary Bitch ready to burn the house down. You: between legal and dead. Me: ageless. 5235
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SWF, 40S, ACTIVE, ENJOYS THE OUTDOORS, movies, good conversation, gardening & the ocean. ISO that special M, who is easygoing & sincere to share interests, for LTR.5230
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1 -900 - 3 7 0 -7 12 7 $i.99/minute. must be 18+
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LUSCIOUSLY FULL-FIGURED SWF WITH BLACK boot fetish. ISO 20-25 YO teddy bear who’s intelligent, sincere, and man enough to watch chick flicks. Kindness, sensitivity, and open-mindedness essential. 5411
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SWF, 30S, AVERAGE TO GOOD LOOKS, NY area, seeks a ‘30s gentleman, kids OK, NS, ND preferable & who js spiritually in-tune w/self, life & most of all GOD! 5082
m m M&kinq w om m
LOOKING FOR YOU: 36 YO, DWM, LIKES dancing, music, quiet nights, sports. ISO WF, 20-40, w/same interests. Possible LTR. 5446
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DIGGING BEETS & DIGGING DEEPER. SF, 24, adventurous, quirky, wide-eyed. Hopefui yet realistic revolutionary loves acrobatic conversations, silence of snowy woods, music-making, watching moonrise over the compost pile. 5418____________________
I AM 50 YO, SWF, SHORT BRN. HAIR, BLUE eyes. I am on Disability. New to St. Albans. I like reading, taking walks, playing with my new kitty. 5087
SWPF, 32, SCORPIO, BORN IN THE YEAR OF the monkey. Fit, athletic & fun-loving, seek ing honest, trustworthy companion for adventures & apres entertainment. 5226
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THE BEST IS YET TO BE, LOVE AFTER 50. Attractive, sparkling, SWPF, 51, passionate about travel, adventures, theater and love. ISO a gentleman who is intelligent, attractive, cultured and romantic. 5428
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5223________________________
SEASONAL MOUNTAIN PARTNER IS SOUGHT by smiley 2nd yr. teler, ex-10 yr mogul skier, who’s intelligent, attractive, fit, 27 YO, w/dog. Only if you’re an active teler, skier or boarder, 23-33, healthy, non-tobacco smoker, fun, honest, in Burlington area. 5444
HELP STOP THE IRRITATION IN MY HEAD. IN need of safety & security. Playful, honest, . hiking up on the mtn. Would like to meet Mr. Right. 5127
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w om an M &kinq m m
ATTRACTIVE, IN SHAPE, BLONDE/BLUE, 5’6” , 43, PSWF. ISO fun, educated M who enjoys good conversations, the outdoors, reading & movies. 5133_______________________________
5236________________________
SONNY SEEKS CHER. LEAD GUITARIST SEEKS rhythm accompaniment. Me: DWPM, 44, tali, fit, active, easy-going. You: younger, fit, active, seductive, happy, outgoing, pretty. Let’s jam! Musical expertise not required!
SWF, ATTRACTIVE, SHAPELY, PASSIONATE about outdoor activities, intelligent conversation, entertaining w/friends. You are honest, fun-loving, monogamous, financially secure, who is avail, to share new experiences & spontaneous travel.5397 SWPF, 32 YO, HONEST, HUMOROUS, FUNloving, active, outdoorsy, healthy, worldly, attractive, secure, traveler, ISO similar SWPM, 29-40, who is also ambitious, forward-thinking, protecting, responsible, resourceful. Friends? LTR?5395
“ IMMATURE" 41, DWM, GOOFY-FOOT SEEKS adventurous Lolita for amorous trysts. Gourmet meals included. Rutland/Killington area. 5388 PLAYFUL, WITTY, CREATIVE, CULTURAL JAMmer, art, mischievous, professional, very out doorsy, red wine, good food, music, cuddle, 38, attractive, goofy, mature, immature, seeking but not avoiding. 5386 SWM LIKES METAPHYSICAL CONVERSAtions, alternative spiritual paths, music. Looking for someone who is creative and down to earth. 5384 WANTED, 42+, F WHO IS EDUCATED, SOULful, sensual & somewhat balanced. From writer/artist/teacher & dog-lover type, what ever that means. No Quayle or Bush supporters, please. 5268_______________________ SWM, 35, s’ 10", 180 LBS., athletic. Likes tennis, reading & weekend getaways. ISO mature, attractive F, for fun 81 possible LTR. 5267______________________________________ MONTPELIER GUY WHO COLLECTS RECORDS in Burlington, works part-time, longtime meditator, like the Aquarian you read in this paper, seeks F freebird, under 36, friends first. 5266__________________________________
WANTED: A OUTDOORSY LADY, THAT LIKES gardens, farm animals, flowers, going to the ocean. Me: A 6’3”, 260 lbs., brown haired, good-looking farmer, worldly, strong. 5422
ISO LTR W/ GUITAR PLAYING GIRL. SWM, 26, ISO SWF, 22-30, to jam with. Into rock, metal & the blues, plus various outdoor interests. 5264
SWM, 22, HONEST, HARDWORKING, CONSIDerate, farmer, fiddler & logger. ISO SF, 20-30, down to earth, who likes to laugh and is willing to snowshoe for tea by the woodstove. 5421
TAKE A HIKE, NS, LIKES POETRY, NATURE photography, folk guitar, hiking, writing, drawing, jazz, quiet times, traveling. ISO special woman to share life’s beauty with. Everything matters, except everything. 5263
IS THERE LOVE IN THE WORLD? 34, TALL, attractive, P, creative, unrequited human, mateless in the urban wilderness. Are you 25-34? Can we build an oasis together?54v
NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION, LATE 40S, 5’9” , 155 lbs, youthful, proportionate, engaging, open-minded, appealing. Likes outdoor activities, travel, laughing, adventure, sun sets, photography, music, movies, life. Any thing that two people can enjoy together. 5262
47 YO, HARRY ISO MY SALLY. SEEKING emotionally & spiritualty fit, NS, small, quiet, homebody F, to share walks, books, love, laughter, massage, nights, mornings, conver sation, food, wine & herself.5261
SPIRITUAL, LOVING, KIND, GENEROUS, SENsitive, open-minded, attractive, 52 YO, HM, musician, pet lover. ISO sane, pretty, lady, NS, ND, Plattsburgh/Burlington Area for LTR/ marriage. 5243 IF YOU’RE LOOKING FOR AN INTELLIGENT, nice, good-looking, educated, successful, good-humored, active, athletic, kind-hearted & romantic guy, and if you are intelligent, happy, attractive/pretty/cute, active, sincere and ready for the right guy, then call me and leave a message. Fate happens. Very young 44 YO, 5’6”.5 24 i____________________ SWBIM, MID 30s, ATTRACTIVE, SENSUAL, caring & a very good listener. ISO a F, who likes children 81 desires a good person to have laughs with 8i possibly a LTR. 5240
• * * »
DO YOU HONESTLY BELIEVE YOU SHOULD be treated like a queen? Then I would love to accommodate you. Responsive 81 respon sible DPM, 30s, ISO serenity, curiosity, imagination, laughter, integrity. 5225___________
j * * * « *
ACTIVE, SECURE, HEALTHY, TRIM, 5’io ", 54 YO. ISO interesting, NS, slender, sensitive, energetic F, 35-50, to share love of nature, hiking, xc, traveling, arts, music and more for LTR. 5210
• *
* * HAPPY, ACTIVE, ATTRACTIVE, PETITE, OUT* going, DWPF, NS, ISO handsome new friend, BUFFY SEEKS HER ANGEL. 30, FUNNY, INTEL- • 45-60, to share the wonder. Interests include ligent, full-figured. Into Pop Culture, film & * business, education, politics (Democratic), fun. ISO like-minded man, 28-38, for late * spiritual growth, culinary arts, salsa dancing night slayings. Good humor a must! 5394 * (& other), music, movies, theater & concerts. If you like to laugh, eat, dance, love & NOTHING VENTURED, NOTHING GAINED. ♦ learn, call me. 5148 DWF, petite, N/S, attractive, fun-loving, hon- * est, compassionate, seeks same in a gentle- l ISO INSIGNIFICANT OTHER FOR OFFICE XMAS man. so-6oish to share dining, dancing, • party and other holiday events. Semi-PF, 37, walks, good conversation, quiet times at * tall, thin, pretty, clever, independent, pre home. 5391 II sentable seeks similar, outgoing, humorous SM for the season. 5136 LONESOME ANARCHIST COWGIRL ISO PELVIC t acquaintance for long winter’s nap. Frisbee l SHARE YOUR DREAMS, LOVE PASSIONATELY, in the snow?5387 I connect with Earth, imagine, live w/ grati tude, let go of why, care for your body, be LET’S GO SKIING! 5’9 ", BLUE-EYED, BLONDE, ! compassionate, notice, forgive, be real, 47, ISO tall, WPM, NS, for outdoor/indoor I experience joy, DPF, intelligent, vibrant, spiri adventures. Intelligent, witty, high-energy F » tual, playful, sensual. ISO 45+, companion to promises colorful conversation & a lot of ’t share journey. 5135 fun. 5246 *
DEAR SANTA, ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS is a attractive, healthy, fit, ambitious, loving, active, kind, NS, ND, who likes country life, animals, movies, outdoors, 35-47. P.S. I’ve been a good boy. 5389
MACKEREL SKIES/BLIND DATES: WHAT DO they have in common? O’naturelle (like feeling great) girls give me a write or call! 5425
I’M A WHIMSICAL YET WISE CHILD AT 33. * A music-loving revolutionary. A strong yet * vulnerable goddess who is humbled by the * oneness of life, yet inspired by its beauty. ; 5404_____________________:_________________ :
POOH LOOKS FOR LOVE, LAUGHS & LOGIC SWM, 31, 5’8”, moved from Boston. Cent ered, funk, Simpsons, cooking, funny, edu cated, fit. ISO friend, companion, laughs & a warm heart. Honesty is still #1. 5413________ HEALTHY WM SEEKS VENTUROUS F FOR friendship & affection. I’m 46 YO, 5’8”. Very caring & affectionate. Your marital status not important as I am discreet. From NY area.
54io_______________________ HAPPY WITH MY LIFE. LEARNING ALL THE time, but want to share some of those things with someone. WM, 52, NS, in great shape. Love outdoors & in.5405____________ MATING SEASON APPROACHING! M, 43, ISO semi-wifd, F, feline who can make tiger nois es. You & I are passionate, affectionate & committed, for LTR. 5401
# # # ;#
ENGLISH PATIENCE. 30YO, LANGUAGE & culture scholar, open-mind, conservative manner. ISO wisdom, beauty & the gentle graces of that special SF, 20-35, I’ve yet to meet. 5400
NO SENSE OF HUMOR. GOOD-LOOKING, S’ 10”, 170 lbs., NS, ND, young 50, but with hair & teeth. Honest, romantic, into con certs, Borders, dining, dancing. ISO lady, preferably with hair & teeth.5265
5427________________________
/ *
ARE YOU CREATIVE, NONMATERIALISTIC, spiritual, fit, active, progressive, 50+, emotionally grounded? Do you enjoy gardening, arts, music, projects, cooking? Me, too. 5402
mm Wm m mm m § i $1.99 a minute, must be 18+.
SWM, 6’4, 31, ATHLETIC, NS, ND, ISO C-DAY party partner & LTR for outdoors adventures like hiking, caving, climbing, travel, cooking, campfires. Even if you don’t answer: Peace 81 happiness shall be with you. 5164 QUIET, SENSITIVE, NURTURING SM, 37, physician seeks happy spiritual younger SF w/similar interests/qualities for hiking, camping trips around VT and possible LTR. 5157 SWM, 24, 5*8", IN GOOD SHAPE, INTO sports & all types of outdoor activities Likes dancing 81 going out to clubs. ISO attractive SWF, 18-26, with similar interests, who wants to have a good time. 5156________________ EROTIC ADVENTURES. I’M A SWM, ATHLETIC 81 attractive, looking for F, for erotic adven tures & other fun times. Discretion assured if wanted. Let’s enjoy the winter. 5149
Dear Lola, I ’m a 6’2” woman who’s dating a 5 4 ” man. He’s great company, a good man, very attecticnate, we have a won derful time together, and I love him a lot. I also find him very attractive, and hit height (or lack thereof) doesn’t bother me in the least. But the tact that his head barely reaches my shoulder when we stand side by side does bother him a lot. Sc much sc, in tact, that he won’t dance or walk down the street with me. It we go cut to eat or to a movie, he has me go in tirst, and then joins me after I ’m already sitting down. How can I get him to stop acting sc silly? Tall in Tunbridge Dear Tall, First ot all, you need to stop calling his behav ior silly. In cu r sexist society, men are expect ed to be stronger and more capable — and, by extension, taller — than women. Height is associ ated with manliness. A good counselor or thera pist should be able to help him come to terms with his physique. Love,
J
O r respon d t h e o ld -fa s h io n e d w a y : CALL THE 9 0 0 N U M B E R .
C a ll 1 -9 0 0 -8 7 0 -7 1 2 7 $I.99/mfn. m ust be 18+
'de'cember 27, 2000 & January'S, 2001
jo
la
don’t w ant a chars # • * *
on yo u r phone b ill? call 1 -800 - 710 -8 72 7
and use yo u r credit card. 24 h o u rs a day! m en
WAIT!! DON’T MISS THIS ONE. SWPM, 29, laid- back & open-minded. ISO similar SF. A interest in snowboarding, the outdoors & having fun a bonus. Winter is near, let’s hook-up. 5147
S & M BUDDIES WANTED. GWM, 36, 6’, 180 lbs. Handsome rugged type craves hot times with dominate men, 20-40, who’ll use and punish me. 5 4 3 0 ___________________________
IMAGINE YOURSELF MEETING A NICE, GENtle, educated guy who gives flowers, opens doors, treats you like a princess. I'm 44, and searching for an old-fashioned love, a nice, loving, trusting relationship. 5145
CENTRAL VT, GWM, 41, 5’io ” , BRN. & BRN. Honest open-minded. Big chest & shoulders. Looking for Mr. Right. Need someone honest in my life. I’m caring, are you? Have nice country home and would like to share it. 2541 YO, friends, maybe LTR.5423____________
EDUCATED, ATHLETIC, DIVORCED WPM, 45, enjoys camping, fishing, swimming, biking, dancing, volleyball, softball. ISO a woman who likes to be shown intimacy & affection by one-woman man. 5141
23 Bi, INEXPERIENCED, TATS, HEAVY-SET, fun, dark hair, goatee. Likes movies, alterna tive music, art, hanging out. ISO M, 18-30, for friendship & maybe more. Gamers & freaks a plus. 5393_________________________
MONKEYS ARE FUNNY. POSTMODERN METAphysical speculation is fun. Conservatives are disturbing. Groening is God. 22 YO, eccentric genius, sarcastic, sexy but shy, mod/rocker seeks similar for whatever. 5137
TIME FOR A CHANGE? WHY NOT? BiWM, 30, 6’, 185 lbs., fit, attractive, inexperienced. ISO same, 18-35, for fun. Nothing serious. Discretion a must. No mail. 5269____________
DWM, 45, TALL, SECURE, ATHLETIC, FUN, romantic, grounded father. ISO smart, sweet, smiling, sexy, slim, athletic Mom to share laughs, adventures, life, travel, food, out doors, children, 35-47.5131 SWPM TO SPOIL YOUI MATURE, ROMANTIC & humorous. Very active & fit. I enjoy cook ing & dining out, hiking, biking, dancing to rock, & writing love letters. ISO active, fit, fun-loving F, 35-45, to share your likes too. 5130 SWM, 40ISH, LOOKING TO MAKE NEW friends. Fs, 25-45. Just let loose & have fun No expectations. Over 5’8”, bonus.5129 LOVE IS THE DRUG, AS IN CHEMISTRY. SWM 44, ISO, sensuous, foxy F, unburdened by identity/age issues. We’re struggling Hedonists. Yes? Your bass-loving equal wants to appreciate, love & respect you. 5128 NOT PROMISING PERFECTION. BUT THIS well-preserved DWM, 38, smoker, promises a slender woman, 25-44, endless friendship, great times, Jacuzzis, great talks & much to write about. I’m worth the call. 5123 ATTRACTIVE SENIOR M, TRIM, HEALTHY, intelligent, secure. ISO similar F, to occasion ally share cultural activities, good conversa tion & discreet intimacy in the context of honesty, sincerity & good humor. 5122 CRASHING BORE, 49, SEEKS NAGGING shrew, 40+. I can’t wait to hear you whine about everything while I drone on about nothing. We’ll be poster children for poetic justice. 5083
women Aeekinq women
FOR HALLOWEEN 8 l BEYOND. SWPM, 40s, cross-dresser, longtime. Genuinely fascinated student of the scene. ISO attractive, domi nant fem(s) for safe & sane initiation into your world. “Aching” to be pleasing & amus ing. Clean & discreet, imperative. Have costume, will travel. 5220______________________ YOUNG 20SOMETHING CU, FIT & ATTRACtive, ISO M, 18-35, to fulfill my girlfriends desires. Must be discreet and fit. Uncut a Plus! 5155_______________________________
GWM, 32, NEW TO AREA. VGL, SWEET, KIND, and sick of games. If you are not a jackass and Red Lobster followed by a movie sounds fun to you, reply. 5153______________ ! GWM IN CENTRAL VT, 43, TALL, IN-SHAPE, active. Seeks in-shape, active GWM, 22-40, for hiking, biking, blading, movies, music, travel. 5151
! I
BURLINGTON/RUTLAND BIWM, 5*10” , 185 lbs., red hair, average looks & build. I Looking to meet NA, ND M, 18-46, for disI creet good times. 5134_____________________ SUBMISSIVE BEAR SEEKS AGGRESSIVE ! trappers! Butch, balding, bearded, blue-eyes. I B/D, S/M bottom bear looking to explore/ ; expand limits with demanding dominant dis- J ciplinarian(s). All scenes considered. Not ; planning to hibernate this winter! 5132______ I GWM, 6’, 170 LBS., 40, WHO ENJOYS wrestling & more. ISO fit GM, 25-40, for fun discreet times. Adirondack Park area. No mail please. 5117
oikeh SWM, 30s, 5’4” , 140 LBS. ISO TWO SWF TO fulfill my fantasies. Must be in good shape.
5419________________________ SWM, 40, EXPERIENCED. ISO SHY, QUIET, modest, intelligent, & cute student; my soul mate, my little girl. A shy one, to nurture & guide, with care & love. LTR possible. 5415
CLEAN, ND, NS, SWPM, LATE 40S, ISO SIMIlar F or CU, 35-50, to share meals, compan ionship and adult fun. In excellent physical shape, willing to travel. Let’s share dinner and put our desires on the table. 5392
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WM, MID 20S, GOOD SHAPE, CLEAN. ISO 40+ F, age, race, size, shape unimportant. Looking for older women that need their sexual fantasies fulfilled. Must be openminded, discreet & clean.5228_____________
you?5247______________________________
SWF 31, ISO FRIENDS 25-40. MUST BE CARing, sensitive, & secure w/who they are. Trying to reconnect with the world! You won’t find a better friend than me! 5383
23 YO, SWF, BICURIOUS. LOOKING TO WALK on the wild side. ISO lesbian Goddess to train me. i am your student. If I get out of line, please whip me. 5118
MACU ISO F FOR FUN TOGETHER. F WHO would enjoy being w/both of us & also enjoys being outdoors, football, movies, etc. Sound like you? Please let us get to know you. 5239__________________________________
SUBMISSIVE M WANTS TO PLEASE. ENJOYS dirty talk & likes to eat out. Can I please
LOOKING FOR A MUSE? YOUNG MALE, 28, looking to be an inspiration for an amazing woman. Tell me what you want. I will comply. Be for real. 5408
ADVENTURE... WHERE ARE ALL THE HOT GAY women in Vermont hiding? Are any of you out there? Active GWF, seeks play friends to share in laughter and new adventures. 5161
TALL, ATHLETIC, ATTRACTIVE, 30S, SWM. Into adult pleasure. Maybe I can make your sexual fantasy a reality. Let me know your desires. Must be healthy & discreet. 5245
SM, 22, CUTE, FOR LTR OR MORE. MUST BE attractive, cute & young. Look forward to your reply. 5259____________________________
GWF RELOCATING TO VT. ISO STRONG, TALL, outgoing F. Must be independent & debtfree. Must love animals & me. Let’s be friends first. Ages 38-49.5406
BIF, 20, NEW TO THE LIFESTYLE. NS, CHARismatic, laid-back, candle and astrology junkie. Seeking 20something SF, w/same interests, great conversations, friendship or more if comfortable. 5214
ATTRACTIVE PCU, EARLY 40S, TO SHARE ongoing friendship & adult sensuality w/likeminded attractive CUs, either individual or group socials possible. Privacy & intimacy assured. You’ll like us. 5381 _______________
Aeekinq m en
men Aeekinqwomen, coni
CU ISO BiF OR CU WBiF, 25-45, FOR EXOTIC fantasy fulfillment. Are you creative? Call us for your next fantasy encounter. 5390
BOARD GAMING! LOOKING TO FIND OR make a group of regular gamers for my vast collection of board games. I have Germanstyle war games, party, family, dexterity & everything in between. 5385
\
COUNTRY ISO PRESIDENT. GREAT JOB Opp ortunity for the right person. Good people skills, enjoy controlling a nation, relocation required. Free room/board. Start immediately, 4 yr. commitment. No experience necessary, will train. 5154 BICU, 30S, ADVENTUROUS, EROTIC LIKES going places. ISO another BiCu to have fun with & go places (maybe a weekend in Montreal) & to have intimate encounters.
5143__________________________________ WCU, BICURIOUS M, BUSTY F, ISO TV/TS cross-dresser for erotic fun. Must be discreet. Let’s explore! 5140____________________ BiCu, 30’S, ADVENTUROUS, EROTIC, LIKES going places, ISO another BiCu to have fun with, go places (maybe a weekend in Montreal) intimate encounters with. 5139
; ‘ SEXY BICU, 30S, ADVENTUROUS, EROTIC, * athletically built. 6’i ”, 190 lbs., 5*3”, 110 lbs. ISO BiCu, BiF, well-endowed Bi or straight M for pleasurable, discreet encounters.5125 HAILS! HVAIWA GAGGITH THUS? “ IK HATJA wintru unte mel gatrafsteinais ist.” Rimbaud. Jabai kannt aittau wileis Gutrazda gakunnan, tho rathjo galatho!5ii9____________________ LOOKING FOR FRIENDS TO CYCLE, SKI OR snowboard and just hang out. Relatively new to the Burlington area and have had a hard time making friends. Let’s go ride or ski this weekend! 5085
f iu d p d e n d A DWF, 44, ISO FEMALE FRIENDSHIP TO share golfing, biking, swimming, snowshoeing, skiing, movies, music, dinner, drinks & the ups & downs that come with living life. 5216 CENTRAL VT: “ MY CUP RUNNETH OVERI" JOY & abundance abound! Would enjoy company of kindred, during breaks from chopping wood & carrying water. Age, gender, sexual orientation, physical attributes, etc. irrele vant. 5146
i A jfU j REBECCA (PASTRY CHEF), TRIED TO REACH you thru your ad #5148, no joy, would you like to meet?5445
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4
3
Personal of the Week receives a gift certificate for a FREE Day
Hiker's Guide to VT from
•The Outdoor Gear Exchange • used • doseout • new 191 Bank S t, Burlington 860-0190
and a $25 gift certificate to
0
THE DOG TEAM TAVERN Dog Team Rd., Mlddlebury 388-7651
FAHC. TO THE BLONDE WITH THE EKG (?) machine. We’ve seen each other around work, smiled in the elevator. Lunch? 5429 BEAR/DEER SEASON HAS COME AND GONE. What a season it was. Now it’s time to take care of business ’til we can be together again. I love you, Sugarbush XO. 5426 ANTHONY I’VE LOVED YOU FOR SO LONG. You’ve changed my life! I can’t wait to spend the rest of it with you and the kids too! Love you, your girl. 5424_______________
TO THE SPICY LADY WHO READS THIS PAGE first, I’m watching. Let’s get saucy on White Heron, and roam the streets. A toast to your wish. MW5382 STEPHANIE, I CAN’T GET YOU OUT OF MY mind. Good luck with Art & Psyche. Love to split a bottle of wine with you & talk. I hope you’re single. 5270____________________ I WAITED ON YOU & YOUR PARENTS. YOUR Mom had too much wine & couldn’t stop laughing. You came back later & we had a beer together. Meet again?526o___________
SHANNON, 10/24 OR 25, WE SHARED ONE dance at the end of the evening at RiRa’s. Your eyes sparkled, your smile made, me speechless. I left into the night w/friends but never thanked you. May I, over coffee?54i6
KATE: WE MET A WHILE AGO AT RIRA’S. I got your gum as a consultation prize. Saw you holding a Donovan sign at elections. Can we meet again?5248
MY LADY GUINEVERE, YOU KNOW WHO YOU are. Your bubber can’t wait to be with you for the holidays!54i4
CRUSTINI, WHITE HERON, THREE BARS, AND a cat. Beaker needs a challenger, care to join me.5244 ___________________________
YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE AT FINNIGAN’S bar. It’s like Christmas year ‘round. Since you I have found. It seems very clear, there’s much to anticipate in the New Year! 5412
MUDDY WATERS, SAT. 11/25. YOU: RED hair, black sweater, teapot & journal. Me: man near you, blue sweater, laptop. Adverse to verbs & strangers. You?5242
CASEY, (KASEY, KC?) 81 BIZ. MET YOU WITH my “brother” at 3 Needs. Perhaps we could meet for G&T’s again, Andy 5409____________
TAD: UP ON THE MOUNTAIN SOMEWHERE you are, 3200 miles west I am. And missing your cynical perspective like crazy. Hello to 3 Zeb as well.5238
MAGIC HAT PARTY. YOU WERE THE COWGIRL that went to H.S., I think you said CVU. I was the Viking with my friend the bee. I wanted to get your number, but didn’t see you again. If you would like to get together, look me up. 5403 TO THE FORMER NECI PASTRY-COUNTER maiden, studying Eng. Lit. at UVM. Your smile beckons. I’m the red-coated occasional vagabond w/a penchant for languages. Let’s talk books! 5399 12/1/00. PRESS-REPUBLICAN PARKING LOT. You: Leaving in your tan car. Me: Standing next to my car watching you drive by. You smiled, I just stared. Let’s meet!5398 THEY SAY YOU DON’T KNOW A GOOD THING ‘til it’s gone, but I’d have to say they are wrong. I love you so much cow. Let’s play outside and make glories! 5396
FOOD GUY - YOU’VE TWISTED MY SPIRIT into a spinning kaleidoscope of vitality & faith, & I have enjoyed every moment. Feed me more! - Ice-cream girl.5237_____________ TALL GUY SEARCHING FOR AN ORGANICALLY inclined Alyssa with harmony. We first met at Merlefest in 1998. Haven’t seen enough of you since. Would you like to get dinner sometime?5233 PURPLE LIP S - THANKS FOR A YEAR OF incredible sweetness. The Big-armed boy.
5231________________________ SHAWN, AUTO MECHANIC, FROM BARRE: “Roses are red, violets are blue, wouldn’t I like to spend a day, talking with you.” You responded with no address or phone num ber. 5227 THE VIEW FROM ACROSS THE LAKE IS great, but how do I reach you? I share your values & principles. 5224
to respond to a personal ad call 1 -900 - 3 7 0 -7 12 7 w e’re open 24 hours a day!
i Ajfuj, coni. MATT, I WANTED YOU TO KNOW I’M SORRY if I hurt you. I think of you often. I miss you. Crocodile hunter & beef stew?52i9
TO THE WELL-DRESSED BLONDE WITH THE jewelry cart outside of the new Banana Republic (a month or so ago): Enjoyed your wares. P, athletic man wants to meet you.
LABRIOCHE, SUNDAY AFTERNOON, 11/12. Beautiful, blue eyes... I’ll let you have the last country loaf. I settled for the baguette. I’d love to meet you for real. 5142
5
FIVE SPICE 10/23. TO BE MORE SPECIFIC... You: replete with Pixies songs and lines from the Princess Bride. Dark hair. Glasses. Me: feeling like queen of the dorks. 5138
2
0
4
________________________________
IT SEEMS THAT I’M NOT THE ONLY ONE who has noticed you. There are others who see you for your charm and beauty. Great energy at Finnigan’s, Wed 11/15!!! 5166_______
DARK-HAIRED BEAUTY NOTICED YOU, TEARS in eyes, boarding United flight at MHT on 9/5. Meet me on 12/9, same place? Tears okay. I’ll be the guy with flowers. Essss.5217
ICE CREAM GIRL YOU’VE ROCKED MY world. The Food Guy. 5165__________________
CASSIE: COYOTES, THURSDAY NIGHT. YOU stuck your tongue out at me. I love you.
UNDER A ROCK IN BURLAP: THANKS FOR your letter, E. But I need your phone, address, POB, or e-mail to contact you. Please write again (IOU $5). Line. 5163______
5215_____________________________________________ YOU SAW ME, I PROBABLY SAW YOU, BUT I didn’t know it was you. Inconceivable! You don’t by any chance happen to have six fin gers on your right hand?5212
DELIGHTFUL TO WATCH, DARK HAIR, FULLlips, wearing khakis and black sandals, Price Chopper. You, with boyfriend saying hello with glances while in line. Can we meet somehow, sometime? 5160__________________
11/15/00. 9:00 pm - LITTLE BOY DRIVING an enormously big green car. You smiled and invited me in. Maybe we could go out on a “date” sometime. 5209______________________
OUR PATHS CROSSED; FLETCHER, BAIRD 6th from 10/5-10. We exchanged glances w/o meeting. I, handsome recovering man. You, beauty with dark hair visiting family member nightly. May we meet again?5159
SAGITTARIUS, BOTH OF US, SPOKE W/YOU next to the bonfire in Fletcher on 11/18. Do you remember me this time? Still interested? 5208
ADAM: WE SHARED A ’NEW YEAR’ TOGETHer recently. It’s 11:45 Friday night & too late to call. Are you coming soon to experience this sunny Eden? Apples, yum! 5158_________
I SAW YOU WALKING IN THE MALL FROM A distance, I watched you and smiled. Then said to myself, “I am so lucky to have you.” Love you, Babe. 5207
SRJ: RRRR. GROUGH. URFF. Argh. Ummm. Grrrrr. Woof and Purr. AJS.5150
YOU WORK AS A CAKE DECORATOR, SWEET! F, long, blondish hair. We danced swing, slow danced at Nectars on weeknight. I gave you my number, I truthfully am not married!
SEVEN DAYS
Employment Classifieds
ATTN. SUSAN: YOU ANSWERED MY AD 4784. You just turned 40. The phone number you gave did not work. Please try again. Dale. 5126 10/28 B ALL- YOU TWO LOOKED GREAT. Nice asses. We introduced ourselves on your way out. What are you into? Wanna get together? Call us J & M.5120 11/3/00- 3:30 P.M.- CORNER OF PEARL AND Elmwood- big green car. Your smile made me want to hit the brakes. I circled the block but you had vanished. Wanna go for a ride? 5086______________________________________ 11/4/00: I STOOD BEHIND YOU AND ORDERed a Budlight. You leaned back and I felt the chemistry. You got a phone call, smiled, then left. You should have introduced yourself.
Where the
5084________________________
TO MY LIFETIME LOVE, I LOVE FALLING asleep with you in my arms, waking up in yours and spending time sharing our laugh ter and love. I love who we are together! YEA!! 5079
LMP, TICK, TICK, TICK, TICK, tick, tick. SEW 5144
5205
\I JKL jt i R h A To respond to Letters Only ads: Seal your response in an envelope, write box # on the outside and place in another envelope with $5 for each response. Address |to: PERSON TO PERSON c/o SEVEN DAYS, P.0 . Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402
$i.99/minute. must be 18+.
..P R tl IY PROFESSIONAL WITH A TWINKLE IN her eye, into painting, reading & aerobic dancing, is looking for a gentleman, 51-69, who’s intellectual, aware & loving— & can twinkle back! Box 830______________________
women M aking men
SEEKING FRIENDSHIP CONVERSATION W/ gentleman, 65+, tall, intelligent, caring. Me: tall, hazel eyes, slim, trim, education, retired P, active, NS. Box 831______________________
LOVING WOMAN, 60, WHO LOOKS & FEELS younger. ISO affectionate man to love & who will love me back. One who is a NS, affec tionate, health conscious, likes music. Box 855___________________________________
GROW OLD WITH ME. SWF, 57, SMOKER, ISO WM who likes auto racing, country music, camping, dining out & quiet times at home. Friends first. Write soon. Box 832___________
SHINE YOUR LOVE LIGHTS ON ME. ARE YOU kind? Are you cool? Positive? Healthy? Love life? Got spirit? Savor every second? Breathe deep? Seek peace? Know thyself? Me too. Yupper. Box 854_________ __________________ 23 YO GM TRAPPED IN A WOMAN’S BODY. ISO SM who will cum & open their Christmas present early. Includes hot candle wax,- love oils & edible undies. Box 845 SW F- CARRIE, 38 YO, 5*4’, 110 LBS., LT. smoker from Montreal. Seeking guy with similar tastes. Love music, early Bowie, Iggy, 70’s, alternative, movies, animals, painting & making films. Box 842____________________ MATURE SWF, NS, PRIVATE, PASSIONATE, pensive, political, perceptive, particular, Drawn to beaches, books, theater, music, labyrinths, fantasy and family. Please, don’t assume anything. Box 843_________________ VOLUPTUOUS VIRGO, 50S, ATTRACTIVE, PWF childless, loves outdoor fun, music, dancing. ISO gentleman for lasting friendship w/honesty 8t trust. Let’s bring in 2001 together! Burlington area. Box 828
23 YO, ATTRACTIVE SWF, WHO LOVES DANcing, sports, driving, cuddling & adventure. Sorry, country music not incl. ISO SM, 18-30 w/same interests & sense of humor. Box 827 IN SHAPE, UP BEAT, ATTRACTIVE DWF. SEEKing well-mannered, trustworthy gentleman, good appearane, NS, to share my life. 50-60. Not afraid of commitment. Please tell me aout yourself. Box 834_____________________ ECLECTIC, IRREVERENT, INDEPENDENT ICONoclast (well-preserved; 52) wishes to meet empathetic M (same; 45-55) w/social con science who values intellectual stimulation & mature emotional connection. Must iike Thai food, no MSG! Box 826
men Aoekinq women SM, 42, ARTISTIC, POETIC, ROMANTIC Southerner, 5’n ”, 200 lbs., in good shape. Enjoys camping, boating, fishing and dance. ISO open, honest, friendship first. Explore the depths of a labyrinth heart. Box 852
jO It 1 M INCARCERATED HANDSOME FRENCH CARIBBean, 32, 5’n ”, 180 tbs., muscular. Sexy chocolate w/dreadlocks. Fluent in French, Patois & Brooklynese. Retired Bad Boy. Release 2001. ISO intelligent, honest, crunchy not country SF. Box 850____________ HANDSOME M, 40, STRONG BUILD, 5’io ” , 185 lbs. Friendly, gentle, outgoing but demanding schedule. Desires fit F for good friendship, discreet encounters. Youth age or Ma, no barrier. Honesty, security, closeness. Box 851 _________________________________ SWM, 52, 6’, 200 LBS., NS, ISO, SF, 40-55, active, fun, loves movies, quiet life. Box 835 SWM, 25, 5’ 7*. BROWN EYES/HAIR. I AM toyal, honest, romantic, discreet, willing, lov ing, faithful gentleman. ISO a full-figured F for a serious relationship. Send photo. Box 836___________________________________ LOOKING FOR ROMANTIC, PASSIONATE, companion. Me: PSWM, 61, tall, slim, NS, You: attractive, slim, free spirit, adventurous, assionate. Like travel & dining. Box 838 ABSOLUTELY FREE! MY HEART! DWM, YOUNG 38, smoker. Good looks/build. Seeks a slen der F, 28-44, who is outgoing, enjoys music, dancing, the outdoors & indoors, romance, quiet times. Make us happen! Box 821______ VERY YOUNG 5CS , ATHLETIC, 5*10“ TALL, well-educated, healthy & STD free, sensitive, romantic, sensuous, financially secure, child less, jack-of-all-trades fella seeks slim, warm, open, liberal, spontaneous, patient, tactile, romantic, sensuous woman who loves the outdoors, boating, & wants to enjoy fine wine & sunset dinners prepared by me on the deck of my lakefront home. A long letter will get you the same. Box 800
A B & L U l^lV FREE! m V HEART! DWM, YOUNG 38, smoker. Good looks/build. Seeks a slen der F, 28-44, who is outgoing, enjoys music, dancing, the outdoors & indoors, romance, quiet times. Make us happen! Box 821
28 YO SWF ISO 30+ SWF FOR FRIENDSHIP 81 more. I’m looking for honesty, love and affection. We’ll take on the world together.. let the adventure begin! Box 849 WOODSWOMAN (N.CT. VT.), 49, SEEKS KINDred soul for dance of intimacy— led by kind hearts, step by step, to loving, celebrating & honoring our being together & apart. Let’s dance. Box 844____________________________ ASPIRING WRITER SEEKS A MUSE TO BE amused. I am articulate, attentive, athlectic, and ambitious. Contact me if interested in learning about me. Box 863_________________ LOOKING FOR GAY FRIENDS IN CENTRAL VT. I am 58. I enjoy wildlife, hiking, etc. ISO mate or friendship. Box 862
men
men
BIWM, 5’5” , 140 LBS., ISO DOMINANT M. I enjoy B81D, S81M, W/S, willing to please. I can be your toy to play with & make fun of. Will answer all. Box 847____________________ SGWM, ST. ALBANS-AREA, 5’ 10” , 230 LBS. sincere, quiet ISO SGM, 30 -40 S, honesty first. LTR only. I have much to offer, are you the one? D/D free, smoker OK. Box 848
BIWM, 50ISH, CLEAN, DISCREET, ATTRACitive, good shape, ISO well-built M for dis creet encounters, days or eves. Box 825
PBGH./BTON. - NOT: SLIM, GORGEOUS, degreed or wealthy, but a genuine good woman, 50s, musical, artisistic, kink-friendly, NA, ND, NS, seeks a “like” male. Safe, sane, discreet, clean, possible LTR. Box 846
SWM, 35, DALI/GARY NUMAN DISCIPLE. YOU? Me Montpelier city. , 1st day snake, been there. Chinese horoscopes a plus. Younger please. Box 861_________________________ INCARCERATED, 39, NON-VIOLENT, SUBMISsive WM. Happiness is: dominant, heavyset, wealthy woman 30-50 to feminize me and teach me how to be the woman I crave to be. Box 856_____________________________ MWM 40, ISO COUPLE FOR CLEAN, SAFE, intimate fun. Central to Northeast VT. Very discreet. Let’s trade letters. Box 853______ CLEVELAND ROCKS. YOU DON’T GO BACK TO the woods &. under the rock from where you came. Box 840
RUTLAND HANNAFORDS, 11/28 AROUND noon in the checkout line. You were blonde wearing a dark, wool coat. Me: grey beard wearing a green vest. Nice eye contact. Can we meet? Box 857
4 digit box num bers can be contacted either through voice m ail o r by letter. 3 digit box num bers can only be contacted by letter. Send letter along w / $ 5 to PO Box 1164, Burtington, VT 05402. LO V E IN C Y B E R S P A C E . P O IN T Y O U R W E B B R O W S E R TO h t t p :/ / W W W .SE V E N D A Y SV T .C O M TO S U B M IT Y O U R M E S S A G E O N -L IN E .
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Confidential Inform ation (W E N E E D T H IS TO R U N Y O U R AD )
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MAYLB R O W S E AHSEP E C i' f IC C A TEG O R V P U N C H IN ™ E 4 ' D ,G !T BOX # O F T H E AD YOU W IS H TO R E S P O N D T O , O R YOU
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S E v ik / D A Y ! ? boE S NOT INVESTIGATE OR t DOES ■ ? 'N ENT. t h e SCREENING OF.RESPOND] THE _RESPONSIBt L IT Y ’ OF THE A D V E R T IS E R .^ E ^ E ^ D A Y s ’ a n y ' p er so n to P erson E.jADVERTISERS ASSUME COMPLETE L IA B IL IT Y . - ........ NCLUD.NG REASONABLE ATTORN EY^S F E E ^K ’ L I A B I L IT lIs ^ A N D <AM A^^^^RESULTV n G^FRO^^ o'r '^ A U S E D E AND VOICE ESSAGES PLACED BY THE ADVERTISERS, OR ANY REPLY TO A PERSON.TO PERSON ADVERTISEMENT AND VOICE~MESSAGE.
G u id e l in e s :
£REE PERSONAL ADS ARE £YA.,.lr*5fcE AVAILABLE.f:P FOR PEOPLE SEEKING RELATIONSHIP SEEKI .R peo p _l e s e e k in g r e l a t i o n s h i p S. s , aADS ds s e e k in g t o b u y o r s e l l s e x u a l s e r v ic e s , o r c o n t a ii SEXUAL OR ANATOMICAL LANGUAGE W IL L BE REFUSED. N O F U LL NAMES, STREET ADDRI ' r e s s e s o r p h o n e n u m b e r s w il l b e p u b l is h e d , s RESERVES THE RIGHT TO EDIT OR REFUSE ANY AD. YOU MUST BE AT LEA&T 18 YEARS OF Ol AGE TO PLACE OR RESPOND TO A PERSON TO PERSON AOT
Four FREE w eeks for: W om en seeking m en Men S eeking w o m e n W o m en S eeking W o m en Men seek ing Men
(tecembefr2 7 f 2 0 0 0 & jamfary‘3, 2001
Two FREE w eeks for: I SPY
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SEVEN DAYS
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G a m b le ... for your discount. 5 Day Progressive Sale E a c h D a y th e D is c o u n t G ro w s 12/26 — Christmas Items 50% off 12/26 — Store W ide 25% 12/27 — Store W ide 25% 12/28 — Store W ide 25% $ Gamble (31% Max.) 12/29 — Store W ide 25% $ Gamble (37% Max.) 12/30 — Store W ide 25% $ Gamble (43% Max.) * Minimum Sale $25 for Gamble * Clearance Items Excluded
bennington potters
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