Seven Days, December 14, 2005

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Vermont opens its doors to refugees. Now what?

AFRICANS, UNITE story: Cathy Resmer p.32a

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SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | contents 05A

SEVEN DAYS DECEM BE R 14-21, 2005

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sections 49A

59A

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S E V E N D AYS V T. C O M

on the cover

music soundbites club dates venues pop ten review this

26A

VO L.11 N O.17

50A 51A 53A 54A 55A

Vermont opens its doors to refugees. Now what?

film film review film clips flick chick film quiz showtimes

AFRICANS, UNITE

59A 59A 60A 61A 63A

story: Cathy Resmer p.32a 03B

art art review exhibitions

13B

03B 03B

calendar scene@ calendar listings

25B 30B

14B 15B

helpyourself classifieds automotive homeworks spacefinder employment

38A

COVER: DIANE SULLIVAN [DESIGN] MATTHEW THORSEN [IMAGES] PICTURED: MEMBERS OF THE ASSOCIATION OF AFRICANS LIVING IN VERMONT

33B 34B 36B 42B

12/12/05

42A

24A

The Boy Can’t Help It 4+4 Fiction

BY CHRIS TEBBETTS

26A

Deals to Die For At a meeting of morticians, it’s all out on the table

38B

personals

BY KEN PICARD

funstuff

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features

10:01 AM

newcomb bliss mr. grieves the borowitz report news quirks fickle fannie no exit shot in the dark weekly post lulu eightball ogg’s world idiot box red meat maakies’ ted rall straight dope american elf mild abandon free will astrology 7D crossword Page lola 1 rose and herb

38A

Royally Screwed Theater review: The Once and Future Ubu

07A 16A 16A 16A 18A 60A 60A 62A 62A 09B 09B 09B 09B 09B 09B 11B 11B 11B 24B 24B 38B 40B

BY ELISABETH CREAN

40A

Hot Type Book review: Campus Sexpot by David Carkeet

BY MARGOT HARRISON

42A

Holy Monophony William Tortolano’s early-music enchantment

BY CASEY REA

columns 08A 13A 17A 20A 22A

local matters BY KEN PICARD AND CATHY RESMER inside track BY PETER FREYNE AN IRREVERENT READ ON VT POLITICS hackie BY JERNIGAN PONTIAC A CABBIE’S REAR VIEW health wanted BY SARAH TUFF MAKING BODY-MIND CONNECTIONS tubefed BY RICK KISONAK THE OTHER TV GUIDE

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06A | december 14-21, 2005

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SEVEN DAYS

SEVEN DAYS

<letters>

HO HO COUNTDOWN. P.O. BOX 1164, BURLINGTON, VT 05402-1164 T 802.864.5684 F 802.865.1015 W www.sevendaysvt.com CO-PUBLISHERS/EDITORS

Pamela Polston Paula Routly Rick Woods Ruth Horowitz Peter Freyne Ken Picard, Cathy Resmer Casey Rea Meghan Dewald Vanessa Harris Joanna May Priscilla Steeneck

GENERAL MANAGER ASSOCIATE EDITOR CONTRIBUTING EDITOR STAFF WRITERS MUSIC EDITOR CALENDAR WRITER CALENDAR ASSISTANT PROOFREADER EDITORIAL INTERN ART DIRECTOR ASSISTANT ART DIRECTOR DESIGNERS

PARENTING A PARENT I want to thank Pamela Polston

for her exceptional article on elderly care [“Taking Care of Mom,” November 30]. After my father died in 1999 I became the long-distance caregiver for my mother. Until 2003, she had my grandmother as well but still lacked motivation to come out of her apartment. My sister and I decided it would be best to move her from New Hampshire to Vermont. The process of finding her suitable housing was only complicated by the myriad options. After becoming her legal guardian I found the process to be less convoluted. Keeping mom involved in the process as much as possible was fundamental. I wanted to give her the support she needed, but I had to find someone to turn to as well.

Knowing that there are agencies available is comforting. Pleased with the end result, my family can be assured that we did the right thing by moving her closer to us. I know that this article can only help others who are in the same position as we were.

Carol Ann Wooster

Donald R. Eggert Rev. Diane Sullivan Leslie O’Halloran Krystal Woodward

PRODUCTION MANAGER/ CIRCULATION DESIGN INTERN

Jonathan Bruce Andrew Sawtell

CLASSIFIEDS MANAGER CLASSIFIEDS/PERSONALS OFFICE MANAGER SALES & MARKETING COORDINATOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES

Jessica Campisi Emily Peters Sarah Potter Judy Beaulac Robyn Birgisson Michael Bradshaw Michelle Brown Allison Davis Colby Roberts

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Marc Awodey, Kenneth Cleaver, Ethan Covey, Elisabeth Crean, John Freeman, Peter Freyne, Susan Green, Margot Harrison, Ruth Horowitz, Kevin J. Kelley, Rick Kisonak, Peter Kurth, Judith Levine, Lola, Bill McKibben, Jernigan Pontiac, Robert Resnik, Jake Rutter, Sarah Tuff

PHOTOGRAPHERS Andy Duback, Jay Ericson, Myesha Gosselin, Jordan Silverman, Matthew Thorsen, Jeb Wallace-Brodeur

ILLUSTRATORS Harry Bliss, Stefan Bumbeck, Abby Manock, Rose Montgomery, Tim Newcomb, Michael Tonn

CIRCULATION Harry Appelgate, Christopher Billups, Rob Blevins, David Bouffard, Jr., David Bouffard, Sr., Joe Bouffard, Pat Bouffard, Steve Hadeka, Abram Harrison, Justin Hart, Nick Kirshnit, Jack Lutz, Nat Michael, Steph Pappas, Bill Stone SEVEN DAYS is published by Da Capo Publishing, Inc. every Wednesday.

It is distributed free of charge in greater Burlington, Middlebury, Montpelier, Stowe, the Mad River Valley, Rutland, St. Albans and Plattsburgh. Circulation: 30,000.

SUBSCRIPTIONS 6-month First Class subscriptions are available for $100. 1-year First Class subscriptions are available for $185. 6-month Third Class subscriptions are available for $50. 1-year Third Class subscriptions are available for $85.

Please call 802.864.5684 with your VISA or Mastercard, or mail your check or money order to “Subscriptions” at the address below. For Classifieds/Personals or display advertising please call the number below. SEVEN DAYS shall not be held liable to any advertiser for any loss that results from the incorrect publication of its advertisement. If a mistake is ours, and the advertising purpose has been rendered valueless, SEVEN DAYS may cancel the charges for the advertisement, or a portion thereof as deemed reasonable by the publisher. SEVEN DAYS reserves the right to refuse any advertising, including inserts, at the discretion of the publishers.

BURLINGTON

DEALING WITH DOCTORS

Regarding Pamela Polston’s article, “Taking Care of Mom” [November 30]: Thanks for the honest article on caring for an elderly parent from a distance. Since I am currently in the trenches, I’d

© 2005 Da Capo Publishing, Inc. All rights reserved.

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like to offer a few vital tips to all others who are approaching this caregiving stage.

First of all, do the necessary paperwork to gain permission to talk to your parents’ physicians, especially their primary-care doctor. The new privacy laws can complicate the communication process if the physicians have not gotten written permission from your parent to include you in discussions of their health.

Ideally, all your siblings should have this permission, however, it is best to let one sibling be the primary contact with the physician. That way the doctor does not get different versions of the problem and does not have to try to reach various people to respond to a concern.

Better yet, try to go to a routine primary-care appointment with your parent to meet the doctor, have your parent sign the permission form, get to know the doctor, and express your concerns. The doctor will also be better able to assess the family’s abilities and willingness to take on various caregiving tasks.

Ask the physician which hospitals he or she has privileges at, and find out where the local rescue squad will take your parent in an emergency, and whether your parent will have any choice which hospital he or she will go to.

As soon as it can be medically justified, use the visiting-nurse agency in your parents’ home-

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Living 20 miles north of St. Johnsbury, I have mixed feelings about the wind farm [“Inside Track,” November 30]. Why build more infrastructure to carry power to Chittenden County when, as I recall from when I lived there, the wind blew there as well?

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I must thank Cathy Resmer for her fine piece [“Older Sisters,” November 30]. The situation with elderly religious can be so easily discounted, sensationalized or misinterpreted. But Cathy did an exceptional job with her research, her overview, and the organization of her material.

Plus, she’s a darn good writer.

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Most of all, after taking care of the abovementioned matters, take time to just enjoy your parent. If they can go out, go out and enjoy a meal or museum or whatever. Or stay home, listen to music and order a pizza. Caring for an elderly parent is exhausting; however, remember — you were not a picnic to raise, either.

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SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005

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letters 07A

SEVEN DAYS wants your rants and raves, in 250 words or fewer. Letters must respond to content in SEVEN DAYS. Include your full name, town and a daytime phone number, and send to: SEVEN DAYS, P.O. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402-1164. fax: 865-1015 email: letters@sevendaysvt.com

take responsibility for yourselves and generate your own. IBM could mount solar panels on its roofs and save everybody else the expense of having to pay for more power infrastructure. As soon as you folks get a nice little wind farm in Chittenden County that may or may not screw up your views, come see us about putting one here.

Peter Whitney EAST BURKE

BLOW JOB

Peter Freyne [“Inside Track,” November 30] has apparently

fallen for the sleight of hand that points to gas-guzzling SUVs and peak oil and then switches to advocating giant wind turbines — which don’t power our cars and airplanes or heat our homes and workplaces. And very little oil is used to generate electricity.

The choice is not between staying in Iraq and building wind turbines. In fact, the motivations and justifications for invading Iraq are similar to those behind wind development: We must destroy these sites to save them; it would be much worse without us; outrageous profits for a few

>@=K

and the suffering of many are a necessary cost; you’ll thank us some day.

Also similar is the casual acceptance of “cherry-picked intelligence” by otherwise reasonable people, perhaps out of fear.

Shouldn’t one be a little dubious when it is the developer himself dismissing environmental concerns about his project?

Dave Rapaport of East Haven Wind told Freyne, “Anywhere around the world, you’ve got an average mortality rate of about two birds per turbine per year.”

The National Wind Coordinating

Lighting the world... ...from Burlington’s Waterfront!

Committee, however, finds that mortality rates in the U.S. range widely (“about two birds” being the lowest) and are highest in the mountains of the East. Besides birds, the amount of bats killed is so disturbing even to the industry that they kicked out the researchers — for the same reason U.N. weapons inspectors were taken out of Iraq: because they were no longer “helpful.”

Like the most ignorant of right-wing-media brutes, Freyne would rather beat up on the Free Press than explore independently whether wind power is a viable energy option in the first place, let alone whether its benefits actually outweigh its negative impacts.

Denmark — the poster child for large-scale wind — hasn’t changed its energy consumption one whit because of wind. Nor has any other country. German grid manager Eon Netz warns that expansion of wind will cause more building of conventional power plants, not less.

The wind developers are salesmen, and as transparently dishonest as George W. Bush.

They’ll talk about the coming hydrogen economy, cats, peak oil, battery technology, and how, just like you, they care about the environment and our shared future — anything other than the fact that wind turbines built today don’t actually do anything about our energy use. They play

the guilts, fears and prejudices of their marks like a fiddle.

Eric Rosenbloom EAST HARDWICK

GOOD BLOW

OK, Vermont, life is a balance and we need to balance the pros and cons of this wind-power debate. The future of our state and its integrity depend upon it.

A large wind farm will surely detract from the natural aspects of some of our ridgelines, much like the power lines that swath through much of our natural woodlands and open fields, or the cookie-cutter condo and housing developments that are reducing natural areas and promoting urban sprawl.

We must ask ourselves, “What are the alternatives?”

Nuclear power, burning wood chips, or oil. Well, wind power is 100 percent renewable, and the one proposed Sheffield site would not only provide jobs but would provide clean power to 15,000 to 20,000 Vermont homes.

As our environment is being further disrupted through global warming, species extinction, desertification, new diseases and so on, I think we should put our energy and policy where European countries, Japan and China have: wind power.

David Charles Anderson HINESBURG

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SEVEN DAYS

localmatters SPORTS

Vermont Pro Basketball to Tip Off in 2006

BY KEN PICARD

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VERMONT — Professional basketball is hitting the court in the Green Mountain State for the first time ever, and if Vermonters rally behind the team, it will be unlike any in sports history.

The Vermont “Frost Heaves,” as the team is called, is the newest franchise of the American Basketball Association, a 42team professional league with teams from Buffalo to Beijing.

The organization, which is still scouting for players and investors, is scheduled to tip off its inaugural season in November 2006. Although many details need to be finalized, the Frost Heaves are looking to play their home games in at least two different venues around the state, including the Barre Municipal Auditorium and Burlington’s Memorial Auditorium.

Vermont’s first pro-basketball team is the brainchild of sportswriter Alex Wolff, a 25-year veteran of Sports Illustrated. The Cornwall-based journalist also authored Big Game, Small World: A Basketball Adventure, about the game’s global appeal. He envisions a Vermont franchise that reflects many of the state’s core values: local ownership, cooperative decision-making, players and vendors with strong Vermont ties, and environmental sustainability.

For instance, Wolff wants fans to be integrally involved in management decisions via an Internet fan site called the “Bump in the Road Club,” where they would vote by “e-plebiscite” on substantive team matters.

“To this point, sports on the Internet has essentially been fantasy sports,” Wolff says. “This would be a little of the New England town meeting coming to cyberspace and meeting pro sports.” There’s good reason to

believe Vermonters will warm to the Frost Heaves, especially considering the excitement generated by the UVM Catamounts’ victory over the Syracuse Orangemen last season. Wolff says he also plans to write a series of columns

Wolff is particularly excited about “bringing the team to the people” by playing the Frost Heaves’ 18 home games in historic downtown venues around Vermont. for Sports Illustrated about the birth and growth of the team.

Wolff is also working with Middlebury College Professor John Isham to make the Frost Heaves the first “carbon neutral” professional team in sports history. Using a model borrowed from industry, players purchase renewable energy credits to offset the “emissions” the team produces when traveling to away games.

Such eco-friendliness would be easier to accomplish in the ABA, which clusters its play by region and keeps travel costs down. The Frost Heaves would face teams such as the Montréal Matrix, the Rochester Razor Sharks, and other new franchises slated for Providence, Ottawa and Québec City. The ABA has a shorter season than the National Basketball Association — it runs from November through March — and the rules differ slightly, reflecting “the maverick spirit” of the old ABA. Wolff is particularly excited about the prospect of “bringing the team to the people” by playing the Frost Heaves’ 18 home games in historic downtown venues around Vermont, within

walking distance of many fans’ homes. Some details need to be worked out with Memorial Auditorium, but Wolff says the Barre Auditorium “is just begging for basketball more than the two weeks a year they get it for state tournaments. They’re eager to work with us and we’re eager to work with them.”

Wolff is still looking for more financial backers to get the ball rolling. Once the Frost Heaves are established, however, he hopes to eventually sell shares of the team back to fans along the lines of model the cooperative-ownership WARREN KIMBLE used by the Green Bay Packers.

Such local ownership and community involvement is vital to the team’s success, he says.

As for talent, Wolff admits he was not unhappy to read recently that former UVM point guard T.J. Sorrentine’s contract in Italy had been rescinded. “Part of me jumped for joy,” he confesses.

UVM star forward Taylor Coppenrath is playing pro b-ball for AEK Athens. Wolff waxes, “If we can get T.J. Sorrentine back in a Frost Heaves uniform and if Coppenrath were suddenly to tire of Greek food . . . we can put together one good team.” m

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VERMONT — Vermont is renowned for its eco-awareness. But for six months a year the state intentionally dumps a chemical into the environment that contaminates public waters, kills vegetation, injures wildlife, damages personal property, destroys vital infrastructure and harms human health.

And we Vermonters just ride right over the problem.

We’re talking road salt. Last year, the Vermont Agency of Transportation (AOT) spread more than 108,000 tons of sodium chloride on its roads and highways — more than it did the year before but less than the annual average over five years. That number doesn’t include the tons spread by municipalities, schools, private contractors and homeowners.

Winter hasn’t even officially begun, and already the AOT has used more than 15,000 tons of the stuff. Nationally, the use of road salt as a de-icer has been steadily climbing. In 1940, the United

States used 164,000 tons of road salt. Last year, it used more than 16 million.

How healthy is Vermont’s salty diet? For decades engineers have known about salt’s tendency to penetrate concrete, and to corrode rebar, bridges and overpasses. But reliable, up-to-date statistics on the true cost of road salt are elusive. A report by the Transportation Research Board in 1991 estimated that repairing and replacing saltdamaged infrastructure nationwide cost from $3.5 billion to $7 billion per year. The automobile insurance industry doesn’t even track the economic depreciation of rusting vehicles — road salt plays such a crucial role in keeping accident rates low.

The impact of road salt on the environment has been more exhaustively studied. Besides harm to roadside trees, vegetation and soil, the biggest concern is its impact on drinking water. Two months ago, the National Academy of Sciences released a study which

found that chloride concentrations in public drinking water from road salt are increasing at an alarming rate — in winter, rivers and streams in parts of Maryland, New York and New Hampshire measure one-quarter the salinity of seawater. The report concludes that if road salting continues at its current rate, “many surface waters in the northeastern United States would not be potable for human consumption and would become toxic to freshwater life within the next century.”

Oddly, the federal government doesn’t regulate road salt or track its usage. But the justifications for its pervasiveness are obvious.

Road salt is abundant and cheap — about $44 per ton, compared to, say, $400 per ton for magnesium acetate, another chemical deicer. Rock salt is stable and easy to store and transport, and it does an effective job of retarding ice buildup by lowering the freezing point of water. Even factoring in

2x4-juniors120705 12/13/0514-21, 11:202005 AM | Page 1 local SEVEN DAYS | december

matters 09A

Âťnews Can the Taft Building Be Used For Housing?

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BURLINGTON â&#x20AC;&#x201D; Where thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a will, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a delay. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s what City Attorney Joe McNeil reminded the Burlington School Board last week. At issue was a proposal to sell the Taft and Ira Allen buildings in a move that would save the district $450,000 in operating expenses. The district currently faces a $600,000 deficit, and projects a shortfall of between $1.2 and $1.7 million next year.

Unfortunately for the board, when 1920s Burlington Judge Elihu Taft bequeathed the resources to construct the â&#x20AC;&#x153;Taftâ&#x20AC;? building, his will stipulated the property could only be used for educational purposes, or for housing aged indigent men. Bottom line: The city canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t sell the property unless a probate judge determines that the sale and proceeds comply with Taftâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s wishes.

This isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t the first time the terms of Taftâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s will have come up.

According to McNeil, the last time was in the 1980s, when the district wanted to lease out office space in the building, and the Chittenden County Probate Court approved the deal.

The court has never been asked to rule on a possible sale of the building, however. McNeil says he wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t begin those legal proceedings unless the board takes that decision, which is not likely to happen soon. In anticipation of public controversy, the board wants to appoint a 15-member task force to study the issue.

According to Amy Werbel, a school board member from Ward 5, the task force would comprise three board members, a city councilor, one representative from the cityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Community and Economic

environmental and infrastructure costs, many state DOTs have concluded that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s still the most cost-effective way to keep roadways clear in winter.

In Vermont, going salt-free simply isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t an option, for economic and public safety reasons, according to AOTâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hazardous materials manager Mike Morissette. The department has experimented with alternatives, which proved less effective and more expensive. For years, state airports used a ureabased de-icer, since salt corrodes aircraft. But the urea was also harming groundwater and has since been discontinued.

On heavily traveled roads like the Winooski Bridge, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re kind of caught between rock salt and a hard place,â&#x20AC;? says Morissette. â&#x20AC;&#x153;If we put the salt down before a storm, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all gone in five minutes. If we wait until the precipitation falls, with all

I T A L I A N

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Development Office, five teachers or principals and five parents or community activists. The group would report back to the board chair by May 1, 2006. At press time, the board was expected to vote on the task force idea at its December 13 meeting.

One option, says Werbel, would be to sell the property and use the proceeds to establish a trust fund to improve the educational opportunities for low-income students.

The building could also be sold and converted into low-income, multi-generational housing. However, since its estimated market value is between $2 and $3.5 million, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s unlikely a nonprofit housing agency could afford it, Werbel says.

Is there a demand for housing among Chittenden Countyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s aged indigent men? Rita Markley, executive director of the Committee on Temporary Shelter, says the greater need comes from poor working families. Of the 480 adult homeless singles COTS housed last year, only 15 were over the age of 62, she notes. But in the month of

that traffic and heated tires, it turns to ice immediately.â&#x20AC;?

Interestingly, Montana, Colorado and other Rocky Mountain states donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t use sodium chloride at all.

Their snow tends to be colder and drier, making it less likely to form ice. Their roads are also made of different base materials, which react better to chemical deicers such as magnesium chloride and calcium magnesium acetate. Also, on mountainous switchbacks, rock salt is more likely to fly off the road and cause damage to vegetation and power lines below.

Morissette says that Vermont is working on ways to reduce its salt output. For example, it abandoned its â&#x20AC;&#x153;bare and wetâ&#x20AC;? road policy, which required all state roads to be

October, 16 families were being sheltered at COTS, and another 33 families were staying in emergency overflow motels throughout Chittenden County. â&#x20AC;&#x153;If the number of homeless elderly men were climbing half as rapidly as homeless families, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d go to bat and start organizing right now,â&#x20AC;? says Markley. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve never had anything remotely like these numbers before.â&#x20AC;?

COTS has not yet taken a position on the Taft building, according to Markley. However, she points out that in September, 65 homeless students started school in Burlington. In one respect, she says, turning the Taft Building into low-income housing could be interpreted as serving an â&#x20AC;&#x153;educational need.â&#x20AC;?

As Markley puts it, â&#x20AC;&#x153;You can reasonably argue that when children are staying in motels 25 miles from their school, or their families are so strained by the upheaval of being homeless that they canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get them to school, you must meet their basic needs first.â&#x20AC;? m

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completely clear of snow â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a mandate which required enormous amounts of salt. Recently the AOT purchased tankers that spread a liquid brine instead of rock salt.

Brine has several advantages, Morissette says. The oatmeal-like substance can be used in advance of a storm and in heavy traffic it doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t bounce off roads, so the environmental impact is reduced.

Brine can cut down salt usage by as much as a third. Morissette says the AOT plans to test it on I-89 between Montpelier and Burlington this winter. If it works well, theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll expand the practice statewide. And by the end of next winter, Vermontâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cars may not all look like margarita glasses. m

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ECO-BUSINESS

Farmers, Environmentalists and Policymakers Gather to Gab About the Green Valley

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SOUTH BURLINGTON — If last Thursday’s “Agriculture & the Environment” conference could be reduced to a slogan, it might read: It’s not always easy bein’ green, but it’s possible, and profitable, too.

The Vermont Environmental Consortium, which hosted the event at the Sheraton Hotel & Conference Center, is very much pro-environment; after all, the conference was subtitled, “Solutions for a Sustainable Future.” But it’s not a political advocacy group. Its 41 members include Vermont colleges, alternative energy developers and the pro-business Vermont Chamber of Commerce. Executive Director Daniel Hecht — yes, he’s the novelist — says the 5-year-old organization favors “a market-based and integrated approach to environmental protection.”

It’s a nuanced stance that apparently appeals to politicians at both ends of Vermont’s political spectrum, from Republican Lieutenant Governor Brian Dubie, who opened the daylong event, to Progressive Statehouse Agriculture Committee Chair David Zuckerman, who headed a panel on Emerging Products. There were no sessions on the controversial issue of genetically modified organisms, or GMOs. The conference drew 220 people, a larger-than-expected crowd that included about four

We want to use that waste stream and turn it into a profit stream.

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dozen farmers. “There are a lot of people on the same page about this,” says Hecht.

By “this,” he means helping Vermont farmers run more energyefficient, eco-friendly, profitable businesses, and promoting Vermont as an environmental innovator.

It’s a concept VEC refers to as “the Green Valley.”

Lt. Governor Dubie mentioned the term in his opening remarks.

The day, he said, was about “putting some flesh, some meat on the bones of the Green Valley dream.” As an example, he said that on a recent trip to Sugarbush, he was told the grooming equipment is running on biodiesel. He sounded impressed.

Next up were Agriculture Secretary Steve Kerr and Republican state legislator Harvey Smith. Kerr urged attendees to “think big” when it comes to the Green Valley. “This isn’t all so futuristic that we’re just dreaming,” he said, encouraging the farmers in the audience to consider adopting technologies that turn farm waste into energy.

Smith added, “We want to use that waste stream and turn it into a profit stream.”

The farmers were definitely lis-

tening. During a break after the morning panel, Jason Burt, a dairy farmer who owns Burtland Farms in Georgia, said he was interested in hearing anything anyone could tell him about improving his operation. “Anything to save money,” he said, “make the bottom line stronger.”

He was particularly interested to learn about Blue Spruce Farm in Bridport and its anaerobic methane digester, which converts dairy waste product into electricity. Burt is looking into buying a digester, too, and was hoping to get some technical assistance from alternative energy developers at the conference.

The developers seemed happy to oblige. Some set up displays advertising their services; others spoke on afternoon panels after a lunchtime keynote address by a pioneering Pennsylvania dairy farmer.

Bob Baird, a dairy farmer in North Chittenden and the southwest agricultural director for the Vermont Land Trust, said he was pleased by the turnout. He said it was good to see so many different kinds of people getting in on this conversation. “It’s kind of inspiring,” he said. m

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SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | inside track 13A

inside track

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BY PETER FREYNE

AN IRREVERENT READ ON VT POLITICS

Dog Wagging: The Vermont Connection

I

t’s one of my favorites: Wag the Dog, the 1997 film starring Robert DeNiro and Dustin Hoffman. DeNiro plays Conrad Brean, the ultimate behind-the-scenes spin doctor hired to reelect a president about to be outed in a sex scandal involving an underage girl.

Hoffman plays Stanley Moss, the Hollywood producer to whom DeNiro turns to help him save the president by creating a massive diversion — a fake war in Albania!

Hilarious and macabre, Wag the Dog leaves viewers with the chilling thought that this is how the game is really played.

Please, say it ain’t so!

Unfortunately, a recent Rolling Stone article on a heretofore mostly unknown Washington spin doctor named John Rendon reveals Conrad Brean is alive and well! In fact, Rendon has been working for more than a decade to create what we now refer to as “the war in Iraq.” If you haven’t already read James Bamford’s article “The Man Who Sold the War,” it’s at http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/story/_ /id/8798997.

John Rendon, 56, a member of Democratic President Jimmy Carter’s staff 25 years ago, has found success in Washington by becoming America’s leading “information warrior.”

“We help clients understand the realtime news and information landscape and how it shapes public opinion and policy deacons,” reads The Rendon Group website — http://www.rendon.com.

Rendon first demonstrated his unique, ahead-of-the-news-curve talent on the international stage by playing a key role in the U.S. overthrow of Panamanian President Manuel Noriega in 1989. The Rendon Group (TRG) got the CIA contract to rally the Panamanian opposition, and Rendon himself handpicked Noriega’s successor.

Seven months after Noriega’s ouster, Rendon turned his attention to Iraq, and he’s been on the job ever since. According to Rolling Stone, Rendon, with CIA funding behind him, is the reason an antiSaddam Hussein entity called the Iraq National Congress was formed. Shady Iraqi exile Ahmad Chalabi, its leader, was also handpicked by Rendon.

In true Wag the Dog fashion, Chalabi turned into the source that both the Bush White House and The New York Times’ now discredited reporter Judith Miller used to paint the picture of Saddam’s nuclear arsenal and “weapons of mass destruction.” Weapons that, like Conrad Brean’s Albanian freedom fighters, simply did not exist.

Early in Wag the Dog, Brean the damage-control genius is trying to recruit Moss the producer.

“But at some point,” says Moss, “they gotta know?” (Meaning the American public will eventually learn the truth.)

“They gotta know? Get with it!” replies Brean. “You watched the Gulf War, what did you see? Day after day, the one ‘smart bomb’ falling into a building. The truth? I was in the building where they shot the shot. They shot it in a studio, Falls Church, Virginia,

t

nd ea ove a l , h g u

D

a

one-tenth-scale model of a building.”

“Is that true?” asks a dumbfounded Moss.

“How the fuck do we know?” answers Brean. “You take my point?”

We take his point.

Now, switching back to what we think is the “real world,” listen to what John Rendon said back in 1996 in a speech at the Air Force Academy.

“I am not a national security strategist or a military tactician,” he said. “I am a politician, and a person who uses communication to meet public policy or corporate policy objectives. In fact, I am an information warrior and a perception manager.”

And a very, very successful one, because the American people’s “perception” of Iraq certainly has been well-managed.

Rendon is quite proud of it, fer chrissakes. He boasted to the cadets that he was personally responsible for getting hundreds of little American flags in the hands of the “liberated” Kuwaitis. He manufactured the perfect, worldwide TV news shot of the locals cheering the U.S. Marines as they rolled into Kuwait City in 1991.

God bless America! Your tax dollars at work!

Last week, an “Inside Track” reader sent us an interesting tip: A little Montpelier software company lists “The Rendon Group” on its website as one of its clients.

The Montpelier software company is called Bear Code LLC — http://www.bearcode.com.

When we visited the site, we were in for a surprise: The company also lists Seven Days as a client. News to us! More on the Seven Days connection later.

As for Rendon, the Bear Code website’s “clients” page states: “Bear Code has developed for the Rendon Group multiple webbased applications that rely on a robust database backend. A staple of Rendon’s requirements is rapid development, and they keep working with Bear Code because we continue to deliver.”

On Monday, yours truly contacted the little Vermont software firm with ties to the secretive international perception-management company that has helped sell Americans a phony war. We spoke with Managing Partner Michael Howe.

Bear Code, said Howe, 43, was started in 2000 and licensed in Delaware. “We’re a custom software development group and we have expertise in backend database applications, specifically web applications.”

For a number of years the company was in Maryland, Howe said, but in 2002 Bear Code relocated to Vermont. It has 12 employees. Three are in Montpelier and nine are in Moscow, Russia. Howe, a Connecticut native, is fluent in Russian.

His little software bear’s annual revenue, he said, is “under $1 million annually.”

Asked about Bear Code’s Rendon connection, Howe told us “We built a couple of database/web-base applications for them, and in reading the [Rolling Stone] story where he talks about media-mapping — that’s really the kind of stuff that we do.

We built some tools for just mapping

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inside track

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inside track 15A

<< 13A

what’s going on in the media space.”

“Media-mapping?” A new word in our lexicon.

Howe explained it this way: “If I took 100 articles in real time and I want to know, of the 1000 quotes in those hundred articles, how many were attributed to a government source?

How many were attributed to a media source? How many were attributed to what? You can instantly see what is going on.”

Howe calls it a “snapshot of the moment.” If someone is “planting something in the media, we can see it.”

In the case of TRG’s work in Iraq and the Middle East, seeing what’s going on first in the new world of online journalism, and being able to “fix” it before the rest of the world sees it, has been of priceless value.

Howe said Bear Code’s software has nothing to do with reshaping the news. And he insisted Bear Code software products sold to TRG were not used to promote the war in Iraq.

“They weren’t. I know they weren’t,” said Howe. “It wasn’t developed or deployed at that time. It began in the spring of 2004, when it sort of became deployed.”

Prior to that contract, Howe said Bear Code did “two discrete tasks for Rendon.” He described them as “very small database projects not connected to the Middle East.”

“In my mind,” Howe said, “we’re part of a move to an open society.” It’s not about enhancing secrecy, he said, but about “transparency.”

Nice spin, eh?

Bear Code software “can be used by anyone,” said Howe, “to really sort of get a sense of what their environment is and how people are responding to their message in the media space.”

Got that?

But what if TRG is using Bear Code’s media-mapping software as a tool in a Conrad Breanesque tool box designed to change the news and, with it, public opinion? Are people who manufacture such “weapons” responsible for what other people do with them?

“I think it’s a legitimate concern,” replied Howe, “but I think the really sort of problematic parts of that article were not so much connected to the work that we do, which is mapping media, but it had to do with the disinformation and shaping of news, which I have not seen any of in the work that we’re connected to.

I can’t speak to that, if they do that. I hope they don’t do that,” said Howe.

Will Bear Code continue to sell software to TRG? “It feels like the question is in the camp of, ‘So, when did you stop beating your wife?’ replied Howe via email.

“I don’t like what I read in Rolling Stone,” he continued. “If I knew those to be the facts, I would not accept more work with them again. I would politely decline.”

But Howe added he would not act based on “innuendo,

which is what the Rolling Stone article was based on. If John Rendon wants to do more work with us, I will quietly have a side discussion with him about issues that concern me. I trust him to be forthright enough to either answer or ‘not answer,’ which will be my answer. I will then either feel comfortable working for them or I will not. If I am not comfortable, I will quietly not work for them again.”

Quietly?

P.S. As for Seven Days’ connection to Bear Code, CoPublisher Paula Routly told us that Bear Code’s Rik Dryfoos had approached her at a Montpelier business networking event last spring.

At the time, said Routly, “We were looking for some custom software development and he wanted to show us what they do.”

Routly says she decided to give Bear Code a shot at developing Seven Days’ online dining guide, called 7 Nights — http://sevennightsvt.com.

Bear Code is also under consideration for developing software for a new version of Seven Days’ classifieds section.

Then, about two weeks ago, a friend alerted Routly to the Rolling Stone article — a friend who was also aware of Rendon’s Vermont connection.

At her next meeting with Bear Code, as Dryfoos and managing partner Mike Lowe entered the room, Routly dropped a copy of Rolling Stone on the table.

“It put them on the defensive,” she said. The Bear Code boys left her with the impression they would rethink their relationship with TRG. The question is, said Routly, “If Bear Code has worked for a company promoting the war in Iraq, does that make them evil?”

Stay tuned.

Sanders’ Predicts Pullout — Vermont’s Independent Congressman Bernie Sanders sure sounds like he’s on the same page as Pennsylvania Rep. John Murtha, the conservative, promilitary Democrat who recently stepped forward to declare the Iraq War “won,” and urged the pullout of U.S. forces.

“For a variety of reasons,” said Bernie on Monday, “Bush will soon begin a drawdown of troops in Iraq.” Sanders predicted the president will “pull them out in large numbers within the next six months. My own view is that we should be able to withdraw a majority of our troops — not all of them, by any means — within the next six months, and certainly all of them by the next year.”

And with 600 Vermont National Guardsmen coming home Friday after a year in the war zone, Sanders is particularly concerned about the ability of the Veterans Administration to address their postwar needs.

“Last year,” said Ol’ Bernardo, “we were able to get — with John Murtha’s help, I should tell you — a half-million dollars for the VA in the state of Vermont to work with the

National Guard in reintegrating these young men and women back into their communities.”

But Vermont’s Independent remains concerned it won’t be enough, and that “as a nation, the VA does not have the resources it needs to deal with this very serious problem.”

Great.

“So when you hear people saying how much they support the troops, how much they love our veterans,” said Sanders, “I think the time is long overdue for them to start putting their money where their mouths are.”

Ol’ Bernardo made those remarks at a poorly attended (just yours truly and WCAXTV) Monday morning press conference at his Church Street office in Burlington. The purpose was not to address the mess in Iraq, but another potential mess here at home: President George W. Bush’s effort to “privatize” Social Security.

Representatives of the Vermont chapter of AARP were on hand to present Bernie with a petition opposing the move.

But, hey, in the “current climate” in Washington, our impression was W’s privatization move was dead in the water.

“You’re absolutely right,” replied Ol’ Bernardo. “But the current climate did not happen by accident.”

While conceding “we’ve won the battle,” Bernie made it clear the “war” was far from over.

“Do you think Mr. Bush and Wall Street and the Republican leadership still do not want to privatize Social Security?” asked Sanders. “If you think so, you’re wrong!”

“So the best defense is a good offense?”

“That’s correct,” replied Bernie.

Memory Lapse? — Or was it more political spin?

We asked Republican Gov. Jim Douglas at his weekly press conference if he thinks President Bush’s recent low approval ratings — 35-40 percent — will hurt GOP candidates in 2006.

“It’s too early to say,” replied Gov. Scissorhands, adding, “Clinton’s popularity after the Lewinsky scandal was not much different from what President Bush is enjoying now.”

Good answer, but it’s not true!

According to the NBC News/Wall Street Journal polls of 1999, President Bill Clinton’s approval rating ranged from a low of 58 percent to a high of 68 percent. The previous year his approval rating hit 72 percent.

Monica Lewinsky may have inspired countless dirty jokes, but it’s this president, the one Vermont’s governor defends, who actually has his head in the toilet. m

“Inside Track” is a weekly column that can also be read on www.sevendaysvt.com.

To reach Peter Freyne, email freyne@sevendaysvt.com.

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16A | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

bliss

BY HARRY BLISS

theborowitz report BY ANDY BOROWITZ With Saddam a No-Show, Saddam Look-Alikes Go On Trial With Saddam Hussein a no-show at his own trial, the United States today found an unorthodox solution to the impasse: the former dictator’s look-alikes.

The look-alikes were fixtures during the regime of the brutal madman, who used them as decoys to frustrate would-be assassins, but since the fall of Saddam, they have found employment opportunities few and far between.

“In Baghdad, nobody wants to go to Starbucks and be served by a barrista who looks like Saddam Hussein,” said Saddam Hussein, 57, one of several look-alikes who have been called out of retirement to fill in for the evil defendant. “When my agent called and told me about this trial thing, I was stoked.”

Another look-alike, Saddam Hussein, 43, said that the call to fill in for Saddam at the trial came just in the nick of time: “I swear, last week, I was this close to shaving off my moustache.”

At an acting studio in downtown Baghdad, the former Saddams have been rehearsing for the past few days, hoping to get their impersonations of the former dictator up to snuff.

“It’s a lot of waving your fist and looking defiant,” said Saddam Hussein, 61.

In Washington, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld hailed the decision to put Saddam’s look-alikes on trial, telling reporters, “Now the Iraqi people can feel confident that Saddam Hussein, or someone who looks a lot like him, will be brought to justice.”

Elsewhere, President Bush announced a new guest worker program under which illegal immigrants will be allowed to work as scapegoats throughout the 2006 election campaign. >

“It’s funny, I’d never noticed how beautiful the Earth was until we unloaded the kids.”

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To find out more about award-winning humorist Andy Borowitz and to read his past columns, visit the Creators Syndicate webpage at www.creators.com.

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A Check sevendaysvt.com to find out more about Jernigan Pontiac and his book, Hackie: Cab Driving and Life.

December wind was slicing through the downtown streets as I sat idling at a taxi stand. Someone opened the rear passenger door, and I turned to see a battered guitar case sliding onto the seat. It was covered with stickers from cities, political movements, old bands long faded into obscurity, and no small amount of gray duct tape. A thick piece of frayed, strawcolored rope served as its handle. This was the guitar case of a longtime working musician, and I thought I knew who owned it. I hadn’t seen him in a couple years.

The front door opened, and my fare stepped into the front seat. First I saw his scuffed cowboy boots, then the pale-blue Wranglers. The jeans were well worn,

This was the guitar case of a longtime working musician, and I thought I knew who owned it. giving the guitar case some competition.

“Jernigan, you old road warrior, what’s going on?”

The man’s smile was warm and genuine. Folded into the taxi, his long, lean frame seemed cramped, even with the seat slid all the way back. His black hair, though slightly receded, was still thick and wavy, and nicely framed his strong features. His was a face that projected forthrightness.

“You tell me, Finn,” I replied. “Man, I don’t think I’ve seen you since they closed the bar.”

Finn and his Irish band had been a fixture, along with the beer nuts and Guinness, at The Last Chance. They’d performed weekly for many years, until the FlynnCenter expanded and claimed the space.

“And what a dastardly act of treachery that was,” Finn said. “I’m for good theater as much as the next man. Heck, my people invented storytelling, don’t you know. But The Last Chance — that was a local institution.”

“Hey, where am I taking you?” I interjected. “You still live with that girl out in Essex?”

“Indeed I do, and that’s just where I’m bound. Good memory, there, Jernigan.”

“Yup, like Dumbo the elephant,” I said, as I U-turned to head back up the hill toward Essex. The local gendarmes don’t seem to mind U-turns so long as you execute them carefully and limit the maneuver to less congested stretches of road.

“So, are you keeping busy?” I continued. “You plow driveways in the winter, right?”

“Yeah, and I’m gearing up for the season as we speak. Then, of course, I do

DAY

ONLY

the landscaping thing in the summer. I’m All Work your typical woodchuck with about four Discounted! jobs.”

“What about the music? You’re still Watercolor writing and playing?” paintings, cards, “Jernigan, you might as well ask me if prints, handmade I’m still breathing and eating. I’m a lifer, books, sculpture man. We’re playing on the road a lot 2x3.5-AppleMtn121405 12/12/05 10:05 AM in Page lately. Gigs come and go, but you can’t clay1 & stone 1 MAIN ST. 3RD FLOOR stop the music.”

UNION STATION BURLINGTON I broke out laughing and slapped the steering wheel. “You know, that was, 1 Mountain. . . Your Vermont Source 12/12/05 3:49:44 PM like, one of the worst movies of all time!” 2x5-suemiller121405.inddApple Gift Baskets • Maple Syrup • Vermont Specialty Foods “All right, pray tell, what are you talkHandcrafts • Photography • Burlington Souvenirs ing about?”

Meathead Films Signing “C’mon, Finn — you don’t remember Saturday, December 17, 1-3pm Can’t Stop the Music? It came out toward Geoff McDonald of Burlington-based Meathead the end of the disco era. I think it starred Films will be on hand to sign his two new skiing Valerie Perrine, and — what’s his name? films about extreme skiing in the Northeast. Geoff That Olympic decathlon guy? Oh, yeah has been getting great reviews for both films.

— Bruce Jenner, for crying out loud.”

Come and check them out!

“Right, right!” Finn replied. “I don’t think I ever saw it all the way through, We carry a wonderful selection of artwork by but that flick was indeed a calamity.

Vermont artists, like Phyllis Chase of Calais.

How in hell do you remember this stuff, Her works are available in limited edition giclees, notecards, and on silkscreened t-shirts. man?”

Farm in the Green Mountains “I don’t know, but it bothers me.

Free Gift Wrapping • We Ship UPS Like, I can no longer perform simple Phone Orders Welcome: 658-6452 algebra on a bet, but I remember Valerie Mon-Thurs 9-9, Fri-Sat 9-9:30, Sun 10-6 2x7-OGE121405R 12/13/05 12:20 PM Page 1 freakin’ Perrine. That’s a serious squanwww.AppleMountain.net, 30 Church St., Burlington dering of brain RAM. I mean, what little Buy Vermont. Send Vermont I have left.”

“That’s marvelous,” Finn said, cracking up along with me now. “It reminds me — I’ve been meaning to write a tune about the death of disco. You just gave me some juicy ideas.”

Finn lives with his girlfriend in a small apartment block behind the Lincoln Inn. As I approached the parking lot, I thought I could pick out his door in the series of apartments, but this elephant’s memory thing was starting to worry me.

Rather than guess, I could ask him.

Maybe if I conserve the brain cells, I figured, algebra will come back to me. Or maybe not.

“What do I owe you, Jernigan? I forget what you charge,” Finn was asking.

“For you, buddy, it’s 10 bucks. I’ve actually raised my rates, but you’re grandfathered in. Consider it my way of supporting the local arts.”

“OK, I’ll buy that,” he replied, pulling out an ancient wallet in the same league with his pants and guitar case. This guy’s stuff has soul, I thought.

“But if it’s all right with you,” he continued, as he paid me and lifted his guitar out of the back, “I’ll beg off the localartist discount. If, however, there’s a road-warrior rebate, qualify me under that.”

His dark eyes were shining as he bent over and poked his head through the rear door. Chuckling, Finn said, “You and me, partner — you can’t stop the music.” m

“Hackie” is a biweekly column that can also be read on www.sevendaysvt.com.

To reach Jernigan Pontiac, email hackie@sevendaysvt.com.

ITEMS FROM EVERY CORNER OF THE GLOBE

18A | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

Curses, Foiled Again Police investigators in Billings, Mont., concluded that Wayland Deputee Jr., 23, broke into a home whose owner was on vacation, hauled away two bags of household items, then returned to set fires in the kitchen and bedroom to cover his tracks. Before he could escape the burning building, he was overcome by smoke inhalation and pronounced dead by emergency crews that pulled his body from the house.

Avoirdupois Follies The National Transportation Safety Board blamed the 2004 capsizing of a water taxi in Baltimore Harbor on overweight pas-

ODD, STRANGE, CURIOUS AND WEIRD BUT TRUE NEWS

news quirks

world speed record for circling the globe by using fat from liposuction patients to power his boat. Noting that he can get 6.5 pounds of fat from the average person to produce 3.2 quarts of refined biofuel, Bethune said that he expects his Earthrace craft to use 18,200 gallons of biofuels to beat the 75-day record. The Dominion Post reported that Bethune got the ball rolling by having 3 ounces of fat liposuctioned from his body to be turned into fuel.

• Hong Kong’s Life of Life Healing Spa helps its customers lose weight by setting them on fire. First, they undergo a fullbody exfoliation and a soak in a 300-jet tub before being sprayed down with a

Hospital reported that fatty tissue prevented standard-sized needles from reaching the buttock muscle in 92 percent of the patients studied, and two-thirds of them did not receive the full dosage of the drug. “There is no question that obesity is the underlying cause,” researcher Victoria Chan said.

“We have identified a new problem related, in part, to the increasing amount of fat in patients’ buttocks.”

Haves & Have-Nots High gas

BY ROLAND SWEET

sengers. The 36-foot Lady D was carrying its limit of 25 passengers but was 700 pounds over its 3500-pound capacity. Explaining that the Coast Guard set the standard in the 1960s, by calculating the average passenger’s weight at 140 pounds, NTSB Chairman Ellen Engleman Conners pointed out, “Average adult weights have increased by nearly 25 pounds in the last 40 years.”

• Men at the Utah State Prison gain an extra 34 pounds after a year behind bars because they’re fed a 3000-calorie diet and exercise little. The Food and Drug Administration recommends 2000-calorie diets for active people. Warden Clint Friel said that he’s afraid inmates would riot if he cut back on food, sweets and snacks.

• New Zealand’s Peter Bethune, 39, 2x3-mortgage122904 12/17/04 12:25 PM Page 1 announced his intention to break the

high-pressure hose used for lymphatic drainage. Then they are massaged with Chinese herbs, wrapped in wet towels, have an alcohol solution poured over them and are set on fire. “We have someone standing by with a towel to put out the flames if they get too hot,” beauty consultant Noel Ho said, adding that fire extinguishers were also on hand while the burning process is repeated three to five times. Spa manager Winnie Ng claimed that the fire treatment is based on traditional Chinese medicine, although traditional Chinese doctor Yiu Yan-man told the South China Morning Post, “I have never heard of such a thing.”

• Medical professionals need longer needles to administer drugs because patients’ butts have gotten so fat that regular needles don’t work. Researchers 1x2-bejewelled112305 at Dublin’s Adelaide and Meath

prices are causing some sport utility vehicle owners to burn their vehicles for the insurance money, according to investigators. “People end up getting backed up against the wall financially,” said Dale Banda of the California Department of Insurance. “We’ve talked to people who committed insurance fraud who otherwise wouldn’t commit another crime.”

• Roughly a third of the cars on the road in Saudi Arabia (where gas costs about $1 a gallon), United Arab Emirates ($1.70 a gallon), Kuwait (83 cents a gallon) and other Persian Gulf nations are SUVs. “Our business is booming at the moment,” Julian White, who heads sales for 4X4 Motors in Dubai, told the Associated Press. “This is the first place I’ve ever sold cars where no one asks about fuel consumption.”

Second-Amendment Follies Sheriff’s officials in Tazwell County, Va., reported that Sidney Russell Hale, 31, decided to see how fast he could react in case anyone broke into his trailer. He persuaded a friend, Whitney Dean, 19, to 2:31 pretend be a prowler 11/18/05 PMto Page 1 knocking on Hale’s front door while

another friend, Megan Honaker, 19, timed how fast he could pull a handgun that he had just bought. When Dean knocked on the door, Hale pulled the gun, which accidentally fired. The bullet passed through the trailer wall and struck Dean in the back.

• A 59-year-old man shot himself while going to the bathroom at a gun show in Faribault, Minn. Faribault Police Sgt. Richard Larson explained that the man was removing his gun from a hook in the bathroom stall when it discharged, wounding him in the hand.

• Chris Flanagan, 41, was shot in the chest while standing in the outhouse at his family’s camp outside Vershire, Vt. Police said that a young relative of the victim fired a .22-caliber rifle at the outhouse for target practice, but insisted that he didn’t know Flanagan was inside.

Not-So-Great Escapes Italian police were chasing Gilberto Antonio Carnoale, 48, when he gave them the slip and ducked into a church in Soverato. Inside, other police were attending mass, the news agency Ansa reported. They recognized the fugitive and arrested him.

• Another manhunt ended the same day, when Russian police captured murder suspect Alexei Britov. Komsomolskaya Pravda reported that the wife of one of the investigators was watching a TV show and recognized Britov’s name in the credits for costumes. “Darling, isn’t that your man?” she screamed to her husband. “And, as it turns out,” someone in the prosecutor’s office told the newspaper, “it was.” m

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december 14-21, 2005

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SEVEN DAYS

health wanted

BY SARAH TUFF

MAKING BODY-MIND CONNECTIONS

Baby Got Back

M IMAGE Jordan Silverman

echanical disorders of the musculoskeletal and central nervous systems — which chiropractors address with hands-on spinal manipulation — are more commonly associated with elders than kids.

But the patient waiting for an appointment on a recent morning is clearly an adolescent. And the toy table and zoo-animal mural suggest he’s not the youngest treated by Shelburne chiropractors Jennifer and Palmer Peet.

The boy selects a book from the coffee table: One Minute Wellness, The Natural Health & Happiness System That Never Fails. He’s summoned before getting to the Peets-penned piece about chiropractic care for children.

The couple found out about the One Minute project when authors Ben Lerner and Greg Loman “asked if we would contribute because of our work with children,” says Jennifer, who estimates 60 percent of their patients are kids. “I sent them pages and pages and pages, and they condensed it down to what they thought would be easy for the public to assimilate.”

One Minute Wellness was published in August, and its eye-catching title probably helped land the book on The New York Times best-seller list. A miniBible of alternative health care, One Minute Wellness leads readers through the basics of “maximized living,” which, the book suggests, can be achieved through moment-to-moment changes in one’s daily life. “It takes one minute to change your mind,” says Jennifer. “A lot of people will just keep doing things over and over again, not really realizing that it’s ruining their health.”

The fortysomething Peets have practiced chiropractic for more than 25 years in Vermont. The success of One Minute Wellness, they say, validates their approach. “Really, in just the last five years, everybody’s been talking

about wellness,” says Palmer, a thirdgeneration chiropractor whose mother, Helen Peet, was known as the “grandmother of pediatric chiropractic.” He was named after D.D. Palmer, who founded the Palmer College of Chiropractic in Davenport, Iowa. “As chiropractors, we’ve been living the wellness lifestyle for over 20 years,” Palmer adds. “We get regular chiropractic care; we’ve been vegetarians for a long time; we work out. We kind of live what the book promulgates.”

Some suggestions on its pages may not sit well with all readers, however.

Lerner, who also wrote the best-seller Body By God, includes a hefty dose of Christian proselytizing in One Minute Wellness. “Most scientists now realize that there’s an intelligent design to life,” he writes. “There are so many connections, interconnections and communication pathways going on in the body that we can’t ever possibly understand how they work. And that’s just how God probably wants it.”

This information is presented in the half of the book called “The Facts.”

The other half is a fictional narrative of two families who find redemption, and love, through chiropractic care.

But if parts of One Minute Wellness are jarring to some, other parts offer sound alternative-medicine information, such as lists of natural-versus-artificial food sources, and tips on anger management. The Peets’ section is straightforward, presenting statistics and summaries that back up their work in chiropractic. “A comparative study of kids raised under chiropractic versus those raised under medicine showed that chiropractic kids are less prone to infections,” they write, citing a study published in American Chiropractor.

“The chiropractic kids also used less antibiotics and recovered more rapidly from injury or illness.”

The Peets are among thousands of chiropractors around the world who

base their work not on cracking backs but on the overall health that can be achieved without drugs or surgery.

Much of the practice involves adjusting vertebral subluxations, or misaligned vertebrae, to restore optimal nervous system functioning.

Though many patients initially consult chiropractors for back pain, an increasing number include the care as part of regular health maintenance.

And according to the Peets, some 25 million adjustments are given to kids each year in the U.S. “I had a child in the other day, 5

through growing pains to adulthood.

“Some kids are actually told that it’s normal to hurt to grow,” says Jennifer.

“We try to get rid of these odd notions people have about childhood.”

The Peets, who recommend conventional medical care for some conditions, such as bleeding or broken bones, see plenty of pint-sized patients for a range of other conditions, from sports injuries to bedwetting, attention deficit disorders to ear infections. They have also discovered how chiropractic can work wonders on colic — and on household happiness. “We’ve had fami-

A lot of people will just keep doing things over and over again, not really realizing that it’s ruining their health.

JENNIFER PEET, CHIROPRACTOR

years old, who was on Ritalin and Prozac,” says Jennifer. “That’s not right — there are alternative, safe methods of helping children without drugging them. Ritalin is a Class 2 narcotic, and there are side effects to it; it causes brain shrinkage, and it increases suicide in teenagers.”

The Peets explain that correcting subluxations relieves the chemical irritations that cause abnormal behavior and relax the nervous system, leading to improved focus. They raised their own three children without a single aspirin and gave them regular chiropractic care.

Chiropractic treatment for some of the Peets’ small patients begins at, well, the beginning. “I’ve adjusted babies before the placenta was born,” says Jennifer. The Peets might help a couple with infertility, adjust the mom-to-be during pregnancy, and then see a child

ly after family tell us that chiropractic care totally changed their life,” says Jennifer. “Now they can go on vacations and do different things that they weren’t able to do before.”

Could chiropractic care help families fight off the flu this winter?

Patients “find that they have fewer colds and fewer infections,” vows Jennifer. “It doesn’t mean that you never get sick while you’re under chiropractic care, but your body functions better so you fight things off faster.”

Many of their patients — especially the older ones — stumble upon chiropractic through Google searches.

“Eighty-seven percent of people get their health information from the web,” declares Palmer. “People are much more informed now about their health-care choices. As physicians, we think that’s great. The more questions, the better.” m

SEVEN DAYS

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december 14-21, 2005

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21A

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22A| december 14-21, 2005| SEVEN DAYS

tubefed

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THE OTHER TV GUIDE

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t’s true: The more things change, the more they stay the same. With the 25th anniversary of John Lennon’s death, I’d been reading a number of articles on the murdered Beatle and was reminded of a chapter in his life I hadn’t thought about in many years. When Richard Nixon was in the White House, his administration conducted a paranoid campaign to have Lennon deported. The leader of the free world had nothing better to do than target an entertainer whose political views he found disagreeable.

Here we are more than a quarter-century later. One might expect that sort of thing to have gone the way of Watergate, slush funds and secret tapes, but what’s happened to Howard Stern is eerily, dishearteningly similar. The powers that be have conducted a paranoid campaign to remove the radio personality from the air, and this Friday they will declare victory.

The show that Stern has done for more than two decades will come to an end.

“Tubefed” is a monthly column that can also be read on www.sevendaysvt.com.

To reach Rick Kisonak, email kisonak@ sevendaysvt.com.

Of course, the Bush administration has a habit of declaring victory prematurely. As anyone who owns a television knows by now, Stern can hardly be called defeated. The self-proclaimed King of All Media has simply moved on to conquer another frontier. In January he’ll begin broadcasting his program on Sirius satellite radio, putting miles of space between himself and the FCC, and a half-billion dollars in his pocket over the next five years — from his radio gig alone. He’s negotiated a brand-new, censorship-proof TV deal, too.

Despite his success as a broadcaster, author, actor, and film and television producer, Stern has long been treated as an outsider by the media and the mainstream entertainment industry. Although in recent years the government has selectively slapped Stern with astronomical fines without offering coherent criteria for indecency, celebrities, politicians and Constitutional scholars haven’t exactly been rushing to his defense. That has changed, however, since last October’s announcement of Stern’s departure from traditional radio — and the shift in opinion has been fascinating to watch.

These days the president’s approval rating is in the toilet and Howard Stern seems to be everyone’s favorite champion of free speech. Newsweek, New York Magazine, US Weekly and Esquire all have recently published features on him.

He’s all over the tube: “60 Minutes” did a thoughtful, respectful piece on Decem-

SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | feature 23A

ST. ALBANS technology. Both Sirius and its major rival XM offer more than 100 channels of music, sports, talk, news and other entertainment. Because satellite radio is subscriber-based, none of its programming is regulated by the FCC. Consequently, many in the industry believe satellite’s atmosphere of unbridled freedom and creativity could, in the long run, result in the downfall of radio as we know it.

Amid all the brouhaha over terrestrial versus satellite radio, though, Stern’s masterstroke has been overlooked. People may or may not go to the trouble and expense of purchasing satellite receivers, paying to have them installed, and signing up for the $12.95 per month service, but pretty much everyone owns a television. The fun fact nobody seems to be talking about is that Stern has also just launched his own premium cable channel, Howard Stern On Demand. For less than the cost of subscribing to Sirius — just $9.99 a month — anyone in the country with digital cable can sign up to watch Stern’s radio show on TV! His broadcasts have long been taped and televised — in

Let her experience love at first sight a second time.

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edited form — on E! Stern’s new channel currently offers viewers uncensored access to 11 years’ worth of shows. By April, it will offer subscribers more than 100 programs per month.

These will include uncensored broadcasts of Stern’s new Sirius show as well as other programming he’s producing for the satellite station. Viewers can access the material anytime and control it like a DVD using the cable remote control. Talk about hedging your bets.

Even if just a small percentage of his listeners sign on with Sirius, Stern will retain the capacity to reach the largest audience of his career, and without the slightest limitation placed on his programming.

He’s having his cake, eating it, and rubbing a big, messy piece of it in FCC Chairman Kevin Martin’s face.

Gil Scott-Heron was wrong: The revolution will be televised after all. m

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CO Second, I think there’s a general sense that, because of Stern’s move to satellite, a media revolution is right around the corner. Until recently, satellite radio has been a minor player in the industry, but Stern’s arrival may change things. Experts are divided on the impact the switch will have. Some believe a million or two of his 12 million listeners will follow him and traditional radio will go about its business pretty much unscathed.

After all, according to the industry publication Inside Radio, 280 million people listen to terrestrial broadcasts, and satellite currently claims fewer than 5 million subscribers.

But others speculate the repercussions will be far more dramatic. Stern’s present employer, Infinity Broadcasting, is widely predicted to lose at least $100 million a year in ad revenue; Wall Street analysts estimate a windfall for Sirius of between $560 and $573 million next year alone, with revenues climbing as the public becomes more familiar with the nascent

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Stern’s battle with the FCC has assumed David-and-Goliath proportions, and who doesn’t love to see the underdog win?

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ber 4; “The Today Show,” “The O’Reilly Factor” and “The Daily Show” aired interviews this past week; Stern will appear on “Saturday Night Live” the day after he signs off from terrestrial radio; and he’ll kick off the new year with a January 5 guest spot on “Larry King Live.” And that’s just the coverage announced before my deadline for this story.

Why the change of heart?

Why the sudden interest in a figure most in the media have previously dismissed as an embarrassment, a mere shock jock? I think it comes down to a couple of things: First, Stern’s battle with the FCC has assumed David-and-Goliath proportions, and who doesn’t love to see the underdog win?

Especially when Goliath is a power-crazed, semiliterate, ultraconservative religious fanatic?

Watching Howard Stern outwit and outmaneuver the Bush administration has been as entertaining as anything he’s done in his 25 years as a performer. Stern has not only beaten them; he’s increased the scale and scope of his entertainment empire exponentially in the process.

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The Boy Canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Help It ALK ABOUT TEMPTATION.â&#x20AC;?

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Excuse me?â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Temptation. The things that make you want to . . .â&#x20AC;? Barbara Walters leaned STORY forward six inches â&#x20AC;&#x153;. . . be bad.â&#x20AC;? She CHRIS TEBBETTS stopped just short of leaving the bubble of good light that surrounded her chair.

George held fast to the arms of his own chair, trying to stay calm. Trying to stay focused. How had he gotten here?

The answer was easy enough to trace but much harder to comprehend. Images of the 2006 congressional elections floated through his head. Those had been followed by the investigation, of course, and all of Iraq-gate and the impeachment, not to mention the embarrassing final incident on the White House lawn, much less the 2008 election. Now, somehow, Hillary was president â&#x20AC;&#x201D; his president â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and George Bush was taking the advice of a 26-year-old publicist who swore that kissing up to Barbara Walters on national television would do wonders for his image.

George didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t hate Barbara right now.

It just kind of felt that way.

He tightened his fingers around the scroll of woodwork on the chair. Just hang in there, Georgie. A few more questions and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s over. And donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t forget to smile.

He smiled. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Well, Barbara, I think Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m more tempted about doing good in the world.

There are still plenty of people out there who, you know, heh-heh, hate freedom.â&#x20AC;?

The sound bite was like a comfortable old blazer he could still slip into. The laugh â&#x20AC;&#x201D; well, that was just habit.

Barbara nodded sagely. When he didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t go on, she added, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Yes, but what about for you â&#x20AC;&#x201D; personally? It hasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t exactly been easy, has it?â&#x20AC;?

Georgeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s knuckles whitened. â&#x20AC;&#x153;There was the cancellation of your book tour; the incident with your neighborâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dog; the altercation â&#x20AC;&#x201D; excuse me, the alleged altercation â&#x20AC;&#x201D; last month with Alec Baldwin in Houston . . .â&#x20AC;?

Hold the chair, George. Just hold onto that chair. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Mr. Bush?â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Huh?â&#x20AC;?

Barbara continued patiently, and, to Georgeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ears, condescendingly.

3x4.5-VSAC121405

“Doesn’t it all sometimes make you want to . . .” She angled her face fifteen degrees away from the camera, to her right.

Her better side “. . . do something you shouldn’t?”

It did.

Somewhere, a synapse misfired. Before George knew what was happening, his hand flew across the space between them and caught Barbara’s exposed cheek full on, flat-palmed, with a ringing smack that caused a sound tech across the room to throw off his headphones.

George stood. “I’m sorry.

Oh, my goodness. I’m so sorry.”

Barbara’s own hand went to her red cheek. That was the last he saw of her before the throng descended. She left in a cloud of assistants and executive producers, without comment.

The headlines were, of course, immediate.

resilient. He withdrew; stayed home at the ranch; went off his diet. The only time he ventured out was for the court-ordered, and highly publicized, angermanagement class, where he sat mutely on his folding chair in the Crawford Community Center’s Laura Bush Library while eight other people plumbed the depths of their pent-up emotions.

During the fifth and final session, Gloria, their facilitator, turned to him.

“Mr. Bush, it’s up to you whether or not to participate, but I will have to re-enroll you if you choose not to share before we’re done here.”

George folded his arms. He pushed out his lower lip. He squinted.

“OK, then.” Gloria turned her attention elsewhere.

And George stewed. He had

12/12/05

LET VSAC

“Entertainment Tonight” led with the story that evening, as did the PBS “NewsHour” and everyone in between. The major papers beat at it mercilessly all week, and Time printed a cover story with George’s face hiding behind the title “Aggression: Can We Help It?” There was no response from the Walters camp to his repeated apologies. Even the flowers he sent with a gift certificate tucked into the card, for a week’s stay at Canyon Ranch, met with institutional silence.

Ms. Walters seemed to bounce back just fine, though.

She resurfaced several days later as a surprise guest on David Letterman, where she wore a tiny Band-Aid on her cheek and read the night’s Top Ten List.

The number one thing to know when interviewing George Bush?

Barbara smiled knowingly.

“Wear a cup.”

But George did not prove so

no intention of participating.

Not now, not ever. He was a former President of the United States, for God’s sake. The world, it seemed, had been turned upside down. It could all just go on without him.

And it would. Another scandal would steal headlines a few weeks later, and the slap would become a sub-Lewinsky historical footnote. If there was lasting damage from the incident, it was going to be more personal than anything. Barbara’s cheek would heal, but it would probably always be true that the former president’s —

GEORGE’S — NOSE WAS OUT OF JOINT. m Chris Tebbetts’ latest book, cowritten with Lisa Papademetriou, is the young adult novel M or F? He is also the author of the fantasy-adventure series The Viking.

4+4 FICTION Anyone who’s ever traveled knows that the journey itself is often more interesting than where it starts and stops. That’s the idea behind “4+4 Fiction,” a series of short stories running until mid-December.

We came up with a first line and a last line, and commissioned eight local authors to concoct the tale in between. We asked four writers to start with the sentence “George’s nose was out of joint” and end with “Talk about temptation.” Then we reversed direction, and asked four other wordsmiths to start with “Talk about temptation” and end with “George’s nose was out of joint.”

This is the final installment. We hope you enjoyed the trip as much as we did.

Page 1

SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | feature 25A

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Deals to Die For At a meeting of morticians, it’s all out on the table

rranging for death is a serious undertaking. There are not enough episodes of “Six Feet Under” to prepare you for the business of selecting a casket, hiring a hearse and composing an obituary. But behind the sad faces and velvet curtains are regular STORY working stiffs — just like your plumber and insurKEN ance salesman. Morticians have office parties, proPICARD fessional associations and annual conventions with keynote speakers. Last week, Vermont funeral IMAGE directors listened to one such luminary who’s MATTHEW breathing new life into the death industry.

THORSEN Mortician Thomas Lynch likes to remind his fellow funeral directors that theirs is an unexpandable market. Whether it’s during wartime or peace, recession or prosperity, each day an average of

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Just because a funeral costs the same as a trip to Disneyworld doesn’t mean we should market it like one.

THOMAS LYNCH

6300 Americans are, as Lynch puts it, “working into the past tense.” But if Vermont’s funeral directors don’t start paying more attention to the essentials of funerals rather than the frills, their sales and the reputation of their profession will suffer.

“You can expand the market for books and golf and sushi, but it’s one per customer when it comes to mortality,” Lynch told a group of about 80 Vermont funeral directors who gathered at Burlington’s Wyndham Hotel. “Just because a funeral costs the same as a trip to Disneyworld

2

SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | feature 27A doesn’t mean we should market it like one.”

Lynch isn’t just a funeral director — he’s also an awardwinning writer, poet, college professor and international speaker. He’s authored six books, including a collection of essays entitled The Undertaking: Life Studies From the Dismal Trade, which appeared on The New York Times bestseller list and won an American Book Award. His work has appeared in The New Yorker, Harper’s, Esquire, Newsweek, The Paris Review, The Times of London and many other publications.

Lynch was in Burlington to speak to the Vermont Funeral Directors Association about funeral ethics; morticians earned continuing-education credits for attending his twohour talk. A frequent speaker, usually to seminary students, medical ethicists and undertakers like himself, Lynch said, “I 4 who like to be around people play in that deep end of the pool where there is no easy math, where there is no bottom line, where there is no certain faith.”

He knows firsthand the troubles plaguing his profession. For the last 30 years, Lynch has operated a prosperous funeral business in his hometown of Milford, Michigan; he and his family own six mortuaries and perform 1500 funerals per year.

But despite the high volume, Lynch said he’s always thinking about those elements that make for a good funeral, one that “serves the living by caring for the dead.”

The trouble is that over the last several decades, many morticians have lost sight of what it is they do, and why, said Lynch. They have fallen victim to the pressures of corporate salespeople who push expensive caskets, fancy urns and other accessories that jack up the price of death but have no real meaning to the bereaved. They are “the stuff, not the substance,” he said. Just as a fine diamond doesn’t make a fine marriage, Lynch suggested, a good casket doesn’t promise a good funeral.

Case in point: Lynch recalled a family that asked him to place the cremated remains of a beloved uncle into an “Open Fairway” urn. Made of marble sculpted to resemble a brown leather golf bag, the Open Fairway urn is mounted on a slice of green fairway, complete with ball and tee, presumably so the erstwhile golfer can chip one last putt into the great beyond. Greens fee: $600. Lynch complied with the family’s request, but he reflected on what it said about our culture and the changing role of his profession.

“They had him disappeared, downsized, turned into a knick-knack in some funereal karaoke, and asked me to become less the funeral director and more the caddy,” Lynch told the VFDA. “We >> 22A

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have gone from trafficking in the sublime to trafficking in the ridiculous.”

Lynch’s words elicited laughter and knowing nods — and a few guilty smirks. His message to Vermont’s morticians — most of whom are men in their fifties, sixties or older — was unmistakable. In this state, the name on the funeral home usually identifies the person who answers the phone at 3 a.m. when someone has died — that

rative equivalent of a wedding without the bride and groom.”

For his talk Lynch dressed the part of the solemn undertaker — black jacket, black slacks, black shoes and black shirt buttoned tight to his Adam’s apple, round glasses, and no jewelry except a simple, gold pinky ring.

But the portly sixtysomething mortician has a round, jovial face, a stubbly white beard, a sly grin and jowls that jiggle when

the corner of the dearly departed fisherman’s casket, the highpressure sales pitch for nonrefundable, “pre-need” services — that are driving the public to cheaper alternatives, such as cremation. A growing number of Americans — 40 to 50 percent, at last tally — are now going that route.

The median price for a funeral in Vermont is now $3540, according to the Funeral Consumers Alliance. And that

A lot of funeral directors are afraid to think outside the box.

LUCIEN HAYES, SECRETARY VERMONT FUNERAL DIRECTORS ASSOCIATION

is, most funeral businesses are not large, corporate affairs. Still, even Vermont hasn’t escaped the “have it your way” mentality that pervades the funeral industry, where ritual has been supplanted by “the warm fuzzies.”

“The food is fashionable, the talk is uplifting, the music is lifeaffirming, and someone can always be counted on to declare closure, usually right before the Merlot runs out,” Lynch said.

“And everyone is welcome but the dead guy. It’s the commemo-

he speaks. His sing-songy voice suggests an Irish brogue. If he grew his beard long and donned a red cap, he would be the spitting image of jolly old St. Nick.

Yet Lynch was dead serious about the eroding reputation of funeral directors. He’s not opposed to casket makers selling coffins, florists selling flowers or monument makers selling tombstones. What he objects to are consumerist approaches to death — the Internet crematories, the wide-mouth bass leaping from

doesn’t include the casket, burial plot or headstone. In contrast, the median price for cremation is $1875.

As morticians arrange for both, Lynch challenged the group to make the cremation process more meaningful to families. He asked, for example, how many funeral directors in the room had seen a cremation from start to finish. A smattering of hands went up.

“You’d better go watch one, >> 24A

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29A

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just so you know how it works,” he implored. “If you don’t go the distance with the dead you’re hired to tend to, you’re not doing your job. Shame on you!” It’s that attitude, he added, that allows for scandals like the one several years ago at a crematorium in Georgia, where 300 bodies were discovered rotting out back.

The solutions, Lynch suggested, are more fundamental than tacky urns and commemorative doodads. Such as: Invite family members to watch the cremation. “I have never, ever had a family go to the crematory who said anything like, ‘I wish I hadn’t done that,’” he noted. “Uniformly, they are grateful.”

Likewise, allow loved ones to dig the grave or place the cremated remains in the ground themselves. Hand them a shovel, Lynch said, and they’ll know instinctively what to do. Only by stripping a funeral down to its essentials, he concluded, can they “embolden the living to deal with the dead.”

Afterwards, Vermont’s funeral directors spoke glowingly about Lynch’s presentation.

Lucien Hayes, a retired mortician who is now secretary of the

Vermont Funeral Directors Association, said, “I think he did a great job. A lot of funeral directors are afraid to think outside the box.”

Carol Pritchard, owner of Boucher and Pritchard Funeral Home in Burlington, called Lynch’s talk “really refreshing.”

The funeral business has changed a lot since she got into it in 1971, she said, and it gets tougher every year to make a living. Pritchard is constantly approached by salespeople trying to sell her products she knows her clients won’t want or can’t afford.

“The only reason I ever stayed in this business was because I wanted to help people,” she said.

“I’m going to keep doing what I’m doing, and if I go out of business, then at least I’ll have a clear conscience.”

Another undertaker from Chittenden County, who asked not to be identified, said Lynch’s ideas really hit home for him, especially the suggestion about getting family members involved. “Sometimes you have to do something subtle to help people face what’s happening,” he said.

Lord knows, there’s no getting out of it. m

EXCERPT FROM THE UNDERTAKING: LIFE STUDIES FROM THE DISMAL TRADE,

BY THOMAS LYNCH: A man that I worked with named Wesley Rice once spent all of one day and all night carefully piecing together the parts of a girl’s cranium.

She’d been murdered by a madman with a baseball bat after he’d abducted and raped her. The morning of the day it all happened, she’d left for school dressed for picture day — a schoolgirl dressed to the nines waving at her mother, ready for the photographer. The picture was never taken. She was abducted from the bus stop and found a day later in a stand of trees just off the road a township south of here. After he’d raped her and strangled her and stabbed her, he beat her head with a baseball bat, which was found beside the child’s body. The details were reported dispassionately in the local media along with the speculations as to which of the wounds was the fatal one — the choking, the knife, or the baseball bat. No doubt, these speculations were the focus of the double postmortem the medical examiner performed on her body before signing the death certificate, Multiple Injuries.

Most embalmers, faced with what Wesley Rice was faced with after he’d opened the pouch from the morgue, would have essentially said, “closed casket,” treated the remains enough to control the odor, zipped the pouch and gone home for cocktails. It would have been easier. The pay was the same. Instead, he started working. Eighteen hours later, the girl’s mother who had pleaded to see her, saw her. She was dead, to be sure, and damaged; but her face was hers again, not the madman’s version. The hair was hers, not his. The body was hers, not his. Wesley Rice had not raised her from the dead nor hidden the hard facts, but he had retrieved her death from the one who had killed her. He had closed her eyes and mouth, he washed her wounds, sutured her lacerations, pieced her beaten skull together, stitched the incisions from the autopsy, cleaned the dirt from under her fingernails, scrubbed the fingerprint ink from her fingertips, washed her hair, dressed her in jeans and a blue turtleneck and laid her in a casket beside which her mother stood for two days and sobbed as if something had been pulled from her by force.

It was the same when her pastor stood with her and told her, “God weeps with you.” And the same when they buried the body in the ground. It was then, and always will be, awful, horrible, unappeasably sad. But the outrage, the horror, the heartbreak belonged, not to the murderer or the media or to the morgue, each of whom had staked a claim to it. It belonged to the girl and to her mother. Wesley had given them the body back. “Barbaric” is what Jessica Mitford [in her 1963 critique of the funeral industry, The American Way of Death] called this “fussing over a dead human body.” I say the monster with the baseball bat was barbaric. What Wesley Rice did was a kindness. And, to the extent that it is easier to grieve the loss that we see than the one we imagine or read about in the papers or hear of on the evening news, it was what we undertakers call a good funeral.

It served the living by caring for the dead.

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32A | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

AFRICANS, UNITE Vermont opens its doors to refugees. Now what? story: Cathy Resmer images: Matthew Thorsen

AALV Open House, Saturday, December 17, 2-5 p.m.

139 Elmwood Avenue, Burlington.

Info, 985-3106

On a Sunday afternoon two weeks before Christmas, the Best Buy at Williston’s Maple Tree Place is packed with people shopping for satellite radios and plasma TVs. But across the street at Philomena Gicheru’s apartment sits a family of African refugees whose wish list is far more basic.

Gicheru, who emigrated from Kenya five years ago, works as a licensed nurse’s assistant and volunteers as public relations officer for the nonprofit Association of Africans Living in Vermont. Her visitors, whom she’s invited over so they can tell their story to the press, are John and Leah Mudasigana and their four children, aged 10 to 18 months. The family arrived in Vermont last summer, with help from the Vermont Refugee Resettlement Program (VRRP). John and Leah are from Burundi, but spent the past 12 years in a refugee camp in Tanzania. Their children were all born there.

The Mudasigana family lives in a two-bedroom apartment in Burlington’s Old North End. It’s cold there, especially in the children’s bedroom — their heater hasn’t worked all winter. Gicheru’s apartment, by contrast, is warm and toasty. The six Mudasiganas are crowded onto Gicheru’s poofy tan couch. They glance occasionally at her TV, which is tuned to MSNBC. Not that they can follow the news — none of them speaks English yet, though

10-year-old Oscar and Evangeline, 8, proudly demonstrate the few words and phrases they’ve learned in school.

Gicheru translates John’s Swahili as he explains that he would like to buy the kids some boots, hats and mittens to help them survive their first Vermont winter, but at this point, that purchase seems unlikely. The thin, expressive man is the family’s sole wage earner, but he’s been out of work since his seasonal employer, the Vermont Tent Company, laid him off in late October.

Finding a job has proven difficult. John says he’s inquired at several local companies within walking distance or near the bus line — he doesn’t own a car. But, Gicheru says, “They tell him, ‘The language comes first.’”

The family’s bills are mounting. They’ll be celebrating Christmas, but there probably won’t be many gifts exchanged this year. The Mudasiganas are two months behind on their $800 rent, and their $500 monthly stipend from VRRP runs out in March. John has closed their bank account, he says. They can’t pay for the phone or the electricity.

So far this holiday season, the only thing the Mudasigana family has received is a letter from their landlord telling them to pay up or move out

by December 14.

The United States, long considered “the land of opportunity,” accepts 50,000 refugees seeking resettlement each year. Those who end up in Vermont are often brought here through the VRRP, an affiliate of the U.S. Committee for Refugees and Immigrants. Since 1980, the VRRP has placed 5000 people, according to director Bob

Sanders. The first groups arrived from Vietnam, Bosnia and Russia, but since 2000, most of Vermont’s refugees have come from countries such as Sudan, Somalia, Burundi and Congo. From September 2004 to October 2005, the VRRP accepted 160 refugees, the vast majority of them — including the Mudasigana family — from Africa.

Most of Vermont’s refugees — and immigrants — have landed in Chittenden County, particularly in Burlington and Winooski, where there are more jobs and better public transportation. But it’s not a perfect fit. Although the Burlington area is large enough to absorb the influx, it’s too small to support many agencies devoted solely to acclimatizing foreigners to American life.

Few resources are available to immigrants, who often face many of the same challenges as do refugees. For the latter group, the VRRP is the primary local organization that provides assistance, and the organization’s resources are painfully limited, Sanders says. The nonprofit’s 18 staff people and 200 volunteers do everything from meeting refugees at the airport to arranging doctor’s appointments and English classes to helping them find apartments and jobs. Sometimes volunteers host the families themselves.

For the first four to eight months, the VRRP provides a cash stipend equal to what refugees would receive on public assistance. But after that, families are usually left to fend for themselves.

Sanders claims that VRRP sometimes stays involved with families for up to five years, but many refugees — and people outside of VRRP who work with them — question the organization’s commitment.

SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | feature 33A << LEFT TO RIGHT: LUWIZA, OSCAR, EVANGELINE,

LEAH AND ZAWADI MUDASIGANA

Housing is a problem for many, suggests Paul Dettman, executive director of the Burlington Housing Authority. His agency houses a number of African refugee families who couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t afford their apartments after losing their VRRP assistance. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The current refugee resettlement program is woefully inadequate in terms of the amount of time they stay involved with refugees, particularly financially,â&#x20AC;? Dettman says.

The Mudasigana family is a case in point.

Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been here just five months and already seem to feel abandoned. John Mudasigana says two VRRP volunteers were assigned to the family, but he hasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t seen them for three weeks. Both are â&#x20AC;&#x153;very nice single women,â&#x20AC;? John says, speaking through Gicheru, but he doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t think they fully understand the crisis facing the family.

John adds that he has not yet told VRRP of the eviction notice. He doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t believe they will help him until he and his family show up at their office in Colchester after theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been turned out. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Then they will have to find a place for us,â&#x20AC;? he insists.

So far, this transient life feels disappointingly close to the one the family left behind. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I am thinking of going back to the refugee camp,â&#x20AC;? John confesses.

But his case worker, Wanza Musavuli, says the situation is not so dire. He says VRRP has already been in touch with the landlord; the letter the Mudasiganas received was not an eviction notice, just a reminder to pay. Since John lost his job, he says the VRRP will increase the familyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s benefits so they can pay the rent. Musavuli has also contacted the landlord about the heat.

Musavuli says VRRP gave the family a lump

c e l e b r a t e

Enter Lajiri Van Ness-Otunnu.

Last month, the Uganda native began serving as an AmeriCorps/VISTA to help support Africans relocated to the area. Otunnu grew up speaking English as well as her native Luo. She and her family were forced to flee the country when Otunnu was 8. Sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s since divided her time between Sudan, the U.S. and the United Kingdom. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Some of the things the families are going through, on a personal level, I understand some of it,â&#x20AC;? she says.

Otunnu also has experience dealing with public health, and with bureaucracy. In 1986, she worked in a Sudanese refugee camp and, later, with Oxfam in England and Boston. In 1993, she graduated from the University of Connecticut with a degree in biology and womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s studies. She worked on an infant mortality project in Hartford prior to moving to Vermont last year with her husband, a University of Vermont medical student, and their 4-year-old daughter.

The VISTA position was created by Burlingtonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Community and Economic Development Office, which estimates there are 800 African-born adults â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and about 1200 children â&#x20AC;&#x201D; in the area. Otunnu says the Mudasiganas are just one of several African refugee families in crisis in the Old North End. In the month sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been on the job, sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s already passed out 150 business cards, and is fielding a variety of phone calls from both service providers and distressed refugees. â&#x20AC;&#x153;They need clothing, health care, dental care, and they need it taken care of yesterday,â&#x20AC;? she says briskly.

VRRPâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Sanders and other service providers

They need clothing, health care, dental care, and they need it taken care of yesterday.

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sum months ago, but the family spent it, thinking the organization would bail them out of trouble. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I understand they came from camps,â&#x20AC;? he says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been used to situations like that. But here they have to change.â&#x20AC;?

Nevertheless, Sanders acknowledges the VRRP is stretched thin. Top priority for the organizationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s funds and services is reserved for the newest arrivals. These days VRRP is focused on helping a group of Meskhetian Turks who have relocated from Southwestern Russia to Washington County. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We provide far more support to the average refugee here in Chittenden County than refugees generally get anywhere else in the country,â&#x20AC;?

Sanders notes. â&#x20AC;&#x153;But is it enough? Probably not.â&#x20AC;?

Other organizations are available to them, argues Denise Lamoureux, refugee coordinator for the state, noting the VRRP â&#x20AC;&#x153;canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t do everything and be everywhere forever,â&#x20AC;? she says. Families whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve timed out of the system should be able to tap into the services of the Champlain Valley Office of Economic Opportunity, for example.

But connecting African refugees with local assistance agencies is a challenge across the board.

Catherine Simonson, director of the Baird Division at Howard Community Health Services, says her agency could be doing more to serve the African community. The organization does provide counseling and parenting assistance to African refugees, but these cases are almost always referred by another professional. â&#x20AC;&#x153;For many of the refugees, knocking on our door or calling our phone number isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t happening,â&#x20AC;? she says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s work to be done, translating what we do in a way that feels comfortable for them.â&#x20AC;?

agree that many of the Africans seem to have more trouble transitioning to American life than other groups. Sanders suggests thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s partly because theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re â&#x20AC;&#x153;not Westernized at all.â&#x20AC;? American culture is vastly different from the ones theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve left behind.

Culture shock can lead to culture clashes, especially in Burlingtonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Old North End. Mediator Brooke Hadwen, who directs Burlingtonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Community Support Program, says sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s received numerous calls from Vermonters who donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know where else to turn with their concerns. Often sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s talking with neighbors who feel violated when an African child plays with one of their childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s toys without permission, or when the kids pee in the street. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Many of the little kids are used to urinating outside,â&#x20AC;? she notes. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Here a lot of people are offended by that.â&#x20AC;?

Hadwen has also taken several calls from Burlingtonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Code Enforcement Office, about Africans who cover their walls with fabric. â&#x20AC;&#x153;For them, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a sign of wealth and happiness,â&#x20AC;? she says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Here, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a fire hazard. You just canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t do it to the extent that they do it.â&#x20AC;?

Last summer, several African children were riding their bikes, darting dangerously in and out of traffic, Hadwen recalls. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I thought, Oh, my god, somebodyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going to get squished here.â&#x20AC;? She found an interpreter and talked to the families, a process that ended when one of the mothers stabbed the bike tires to keep the kids from riding. That outcome saddened Hadwen. Would it have gone differently if someone from within the community >> 34A

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Culture shock can lead to culture clashes, especially in Burlingtonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Old North End. had approached them?

The opportunity to have such a person working with the city inspired CEDO to create Otunnuâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s position, says CEDO organizer Betsy Ruzansky. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just going to hire anyone,â&#x20AC;? she says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It felt like such a gift that she was not only so qualified but also interested in being a VISTA.â&#x20AC;? Ruzansky adds, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s received by the community much differently than I might be, and thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s important.â&#x20AC;?

Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a diplomatic way of saying that Otunnuâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s accent and dark skin give her an immediate advantage in this work. Ruzansky â&#x20AC;&#x201D; like the vast majority of Vermonters â&#x20AC;&#x201D; is white.

Otunnu has lived much of her life in the United States, but she says people in Vermont still see her on the bus and ask her if she is a refugee. It doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t matter how long sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been here â&#x20AC;&#x201D; she still sticks out.

Sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s grown accustomed to that, but she muses that many African refugees must feel like theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re under the spotlight. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s like being completely naked,â&#x20AC;? she says.

Not that Otunnu spends much time talking about race relations â&#x20AC;&#x201D; the conversations she has usually revolve around more immediate concerns.

Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the case one morning when she drops by the basement of St. Josephâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s School on Allen Street. Seven women from Somalia, Burundi and Togo have gathered for English classes

and day care sponsored by the Visiting Nurses Association.

Some of them wear colorful skirts and scarves, while others are dressed casually in sweats.

Otunnu is clad in jeans and a CEDO sweatshirt, her amber dreads uncovered.

Otunnu draws pictures and plays with three toddlers while their mothers learn English. It looks like sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s goofing off, but sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s building relationships that will ultimately help her do her job, Otunnu explains. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s really a good place for me to be because I can interact with them easily, get to know the kids and the parents.â&#x20AC;?

During the morning checkin, one of the women confessed to being hungry, Otunnu relates. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I asked her if she had gone to the food shelf. She said â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;No, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s canned food.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; They want fresh food. Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not used to the cans. The food shelf,â&#x20AC;? she continues, â&#x20AC;&#x153;is really willing to work with these people, but they need to know why the people donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t go there.â&#x20AC;?

After a break the teacher, a Bosnian native, invites Otunnu to address the class. She passes out some business cards, and speaks in a mixture of basic English and Swahili. â&#x20AC;&#x153;This is my number,â&#x20AC;? she tells them. â&#x20AC;&#x153;So we can talk, and I see what I can do for you, whether itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s food or doctor, anything. You call, and I can come to your house.â&#x20AC;?

She broaches the subject of the food shelf. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Remember we were talking about food shelf?â&#x20AC;? she asks. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Almost no food in the house, you go to food shelf.â&#x20AC;?

The women nod. Otunnu looks around the table. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Anybody needs today?â&#x20AC;? she asks. No one responds. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Tomorrow?â&#x20AC;? she asks again, and one woman nods her head. â&#x20AC;&#x153;You need tomorrow? Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll come to your house.â&#x20AC;?

Otunnu loves her job, she says afterwards. â&#x20AC;&#x153;You donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know if somebodyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going to ask

>> 36A

LAJIRI VAN NESS-OTUNNU AND HER DAUGHTER, AJULA, WANZA MUSAVULI

SEVEN DAYS

Wrap up

december 14-21, 2005

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35A

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36A | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

with

africans, unite << 34A

you for advice to write a grant or ask you to babysit for a little. It’s great.”

Bristol

Otunnu can only do so much for Burlington’s growing refugee population, and her job lasts a year. That’s why CEDO has paired her with the Association of Africans Living in Vermont. The grassroots group is better able to identify day-to-day problems than official governmental agencies, and can connect newcomers with other Africans who have successfully navigated the transition to American life.

Founded in 1998, the 40member group connects immi-

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But is it enough?

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grants and refugees both to each other and to the wider Vermont community. Until now, AALV has been staffed entirely by volunteers, all of whom have full-time jobs.

That’s made organizational development difficult.

Although the group exists specifically to connect Africans in Vermont to service providers, most of the latter have never heard of it.

Otunnu will spend most of her time at the AALV office, on Elmwood Avenue between North and Allen Streets. The large, ground-floor windows look out on the sidewalk, where Otunnu can see passing pedestrians, and across the street to the cemetery where Ethan Allen’s wife is buried.

Inside, the space is decorated simply with a map of Africa, and a sign bearing the group’s logo, the letters AAL inside a giant “V.” The AALV moved from Shelburne Road to this more convenient location four months ago, but there’s still no sign out front. “It costs money to have a sign,” Otunnu notes. Thanks to

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CEDO, she’s the new front desk person . . . that is, if there were a front desk.

CEDO hopes it can bolster the association by having Otunnu — who earns a paltry $850 monthly stipend — sit in the office and answer the phone. Then, if someone calls during business hours, there’s a reasonable chance of being helped. CEDO also hopes to hire a staff person to support AALV. In the meantime, Otunnu plans to stock the association’s office with educational materials, and with forms to help people apply for everything from Catholic Charities aid to food stamps. And she hopes to get the computers up and running, to provide Internet access to Africans who can communicate with family back home. She notes that visitors will soon be able to send and receive faxes from the office, and make local phone calls for free. Otunnu wants the office to become a safe space where Africans of all nationalities will feel comfortable.

To announce the AALV’s new, expanded services to the community, Otunnu is helping to plan an open house.

Everyone in the community is invited to the grand opening, though Otunnu worries they’ll have trouble fitting a large crowd into the small space.

First, though, they have to get the word out. Otunnu and Gicheru work on this one weekday morning. When a volunteer English as a Second Language teacher walks by the office, Otunnu cuts herself off mid-sentence and rushes to open the door.

“Hey, Dave!” she shouts as he passes. He greets her enthusiastically. She tells him she’s holding office hours at the AALV today. “If you see some of your ladies,” she tells him, “you can send them out.”

“This is our grassroots way of doing things,” Otunnu remarks with a laugh as she closes the door again. It seems simple, but the newly transplanted Africans and the communities in which they live desperately need these connections.

A few minutes later, a Somali Bantu family that neither Otunnu nor Gicheru recognizes walks down the sidewalk without stopping or looking up. Both women rush to the door, and open it to greet them.

The man and woman smile broadly at them, and they exchange a few words in Swahili. The fluent Gicheru does most of the talking. As the family walks away, they and Gicheru and Otunnu all say “Asante!”

It means “thank you.” m

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38A | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

<THEATER>

Royally Screwed Theater review: The Once and Future Ubu

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bsolute power corrupts absolutely.

Revolutions devour their own children.

These truisms march across history’s pages, modern-day monarchs perpetuate the gory reality, and people respond as they always STORY have: either by sticking their heads in the ELISABETH sand, or by exposing the emperors as naked CREAN fools. Satire is a particularly effective political weapon, because dunderheaded leaders IMAGE are less likely to recognize their caricatures MATTHEW and send satirists to the guillotine.

THORSEN Burlington playwright Seth Jarvis shouldn’t fear personal scrutiny just yet. His The Once The Once and Future Ubu, a withering, absurdist take on and Future Ubu, the ravages of power, now playing at the 135 directed by Seth Jarvis, produced Pearl Shoebox Theatre, looks at the timeless

by Sweet Racket foibles of rulers and revolutionaries rather than Productions. directly skewering today’s political situation.

135 Pearl There is a lot to like about this wildly Shoebox Theatre, ambitious, ebulliently vulgar new comedy: Burlington.

December 14-17, an enthusiastic cast, well-defined characters, colorful production design, snappy dialogue 8 p.m. $15. and a thorough lampooning of human weaknesses. But the overly long script is in desperate need of a good editor. Even allowing for a healthy allotment of Waiting for Godot-style redundancy, many points are flogged ad nauseum, to the detriment of the

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play. Much good stuff gets lost amidst the ceaseless swirl of repetition. Perhaps this highlights why a writer should not direct his own new play, as Jarvis has. Someone else should be able to yell, “Cut!” The Once and Future Ubu is loosely inspired by the works of Alfred Jarry, a late19th-century Frenchman who dabbled in many artistic ventures and died at 34, pickled by absinthe. Jarry’s trilogy of Ubu plays, begun as teen parodies of a hated physics teacher, are early progenitors of the Dada, Surrealist and Absurdist literary movements. Jarvis’ Ubu maintains the flavor of schoolboy satire, replete with flatulence sound effects and creatively crude epithets such as “By Aunt Jemima’s vagina!” and “By Hitler’s missing testicle!”

Pa and Ma Ubu, the quixotically despotic rulers of Poland, are bored and unhappy.

On the throne for 26 years, the king is depressed that his people do not love him in spite of his tyrannical malfeasance. His queen, who cuckolds him on a regular basis, calls him “old, fat and partially retarded.”

Meanwhile, a motley crew of three fashionably dressed society Naysayers, two khaki-clad Rebels and a safety-pinned Punk have tepid plans to overthrow the king. More concerned

SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | feature 39A with catchy sloganeering than the consequences of their actions, this band frets over details: Assassinating the monarch might create troublesome stains. Revolution has to fit in with their social calendars.

The king doesn’t trust anyone, including his key advisor, The Bank, and rightfully so. This greasy manifestation of the money machine is secretly supporting the rebels as part of his master plan for personal aggrandizement.

The king’s ill-timed insult to the sultry Spanish ambassador leads to an invasion of Poland by a coalition of the French, Spanish and Canadian armies. At the same time, the American president is visiting, which is important for propping up the king’s domestic and international reputation. So Pa Ubu is eager to distract the people — perhaps with a scandal, or a new popculture phenomenon? Ma Ubu is eager for a threesome with the Prez and his Secret Service agent. The revolutionaries, meanwhile, plan to stage their coup at the state banquet. The aftermath is predictably bloody and, as always, the truth is swept under a rug — literally.

Ubu’s dialogue features some zingers and puns that would make the “Daily Show” writers proud.

One of the Naysayers remarks, “The truth is spun until it’s dizzy.”

The scandal that The Bank proposes leaking to the media: Senator Obloquy was caught fellating a baby pig — yes, “sucking a suckling.” The king rejects his advisors’ counsel, because: “All the advice I’ve received so far has been poisoned with reason and twisted by the ludicrous grip of logic.” He turns instead to friendly sock puppets for input.

Dynamic lead performances by Eric Olsen and Amanda Gustafson as Pa and Ma Ubu headlined a large, high-energy cast. Olsen played the cranky king with a moody scowl. Despite the monarch’s disdain for his people and his grotesquely juvenile behavior, Olsen created a remarkably sympathetic portrayal; in some ways, the king is just a feckless, henpecked spouse looking for a little peace.

Gustafson created a ball-busting queen with raunchy appetites, sexual and gustatory. Her perennially pursed lips reflected her sourpuss attitude, and she worked her fat suit like a hormonally charged Jerry Springer guest. As fun as Olsen and Gustafson were to watch, however, even their shtick got a little old; their scenes — mostly sitting on their thrones, complaining and insulting each other vituperatively — went over and over the same ground.

As The Bank, Herbert van der Poll personified the smarmy slimebag you love to hate. He lisped and leered, hitching up his high-water pants, rocking on his heels, and slicking back his oily hair as he schemed. But The Bank’s role is an example of the writer not knowing when to say when. We didn’t need to see him stepping to the front of the stage three or four times to recap his dastardly plan. He’s a greedy backstabber, in cahoots with the rebels. Got it the first time.

The character of The Witch also suffered from too many versions of the same scene. The role is a terrible weak spot in the play, badly conceived and poorly executed. While the idea of the soothsayer as a foil

to the monarch is classic — see Greeks, Ancient, and Shakespeare, William, in your drama dictionary — this witch didn’t fly. The monotonous joke is that she’s a drunk whose predictions are as banal as a syndicated Gannett horoscope. Funny for one scene, but not for several. Andrea Krackow’s overthe-top, Merlot-swigging, duckboot-wearing sprite was a boorish bore, and her scenes dragged heavily on the show’s pacing.

All the secondary characters turned in well-crafted performances. Shawn Lipenski made a magnetic Punk, all wild talk and crazy style but little action. Brett Hughes hissed and sneered smartly as Rebel 1, whose bandolier of bullets marked his virility and whose faraway gaze connoted his visionary status. Among his bold plans for overthrowing the king: “Trivialize him to death!”

Of the half-dozen actors who played multiple characters, the energetic Frank Zammiello stood out. He was loud and hyperactive as the raucous frat-boy Assassin — grenade-laden yet wearing an “Ambassadors for Christ” T-shirt — and silently threatening behind mirrored shades as the Secret Service agent, darting his head like a caffeinated reptile.

Also impressive in his five roles was Nathan Jarvis. He performed with goofy sincerity in the two song-and-dance numbers, one of which he composed: “The Pop Culture Phenomenon.” The queen finds the disco routine so vapid that she pronounces, “I’ve seen diseased scrotums with more charisma.”

Jarvis was also irrepressibly charming in “The Blooming of the Daffodildoes,” dancing a delicate tribute to spring, with two others, in a Robin Hood-green costume while singing ribald, offensive lyrics.

Isaac Wasuck’s production design worked wonders with the Shoebox Theatre’s small space. He effectively used the wide, shallow stage, separating the royals’ throne area and the rebels’ hay-strewn gathering place using a slightly projecting, folding screen with a stained glass window. Repeated irregular spiral motifs — on the thrones and on Pa Ubu’s belly — unified the design. Wasuck’s elaborate costumes featured innovative details, such as the golden fabric curlicues atop the king’s crown.

Clever artistic flourishes and visual treats surprised and delighted throughout the play. Hung behind the thrones — the king’s, a gussied-up Mission-style chair; the queen’s, a painted barstool — were two beautiful portraits, painted by Adrian Tans, of the Ubus in all their sour ugliness.

The American president was played by a large wooden dowel — a literal Big Stick — carried by the Secret Service agent. The banquet table, laden with glossy plastic and Styrofoam fruit, featured a smiling, fake-fur boar’s head. The long arm of the media was a giant limb with a big, papier-mâché hand holding a cardboard camera.

This homegrown work’s ambitious scale is impressive, and the full-throttle commitment of the cast and production team was commendable. A serious editorial tune-up might ensure that The Once and Future Ubu comes around not just once but in the future as well. m

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40A | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

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Book review: Campus Sexpot: A Memoir by David Carkeet

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irst off, let’s get the issue of the title out of the way. Campus Sexpot: A Memoir, by Middlesex writer David Carkeet, is not the memoir of a campus sexpot. Nor is it the memoir of someone who fondly remembers STORY his encounter with a campus sexpot. Readers MARGOT who are merely in search of salacious prose HARRISON are better advised to check out the “sexuality” section of Barnes & Noble.

Campus Sexpot: Campus Sexpot, which won this year’s A Memoir, by award for creative nonfiction from the David Carkeet, Association of Writers and Writing University of Programs, is one of those meta-works — a Georgia Press, 137 pages, book about a book. Campus Sexpot was the $22.95. title of a pulp novel published in 1961 by “Art Enterprises” and authored by one Dale Koby, who went on to pen such weighty tomes as Airborne Passions and A Teacher Confesses to Sex in the Classroom.

Carkeet, an author of acclaimed novels, short stories and essays, has never met Dale Koby. Oddly, their paths didn’t cross when Carkeet was a freshman at the high school where Koby taught English, in a sleepy little town in the foothills of California’s Sierras.

About a year after Koby’s abrupt disappearance, however, everyone in the town of

F

Sonora knew his name, because that’s when they found out he’d written a sexy novel with their high school campus as its setting.

Real teachers and students appeared in it under transparent noms de plume — “Verne Oliver” becomes “Vern Tolliver,” for example. And protagonist Don Kaufield, a teacher who leaps headlong into an illadvised affair with his “amply endowed” student Linda Franklin, was obviously a wishful portrait of the author himself.

The ruckus Campus Sexpot caused in Sonora in 1962 was minor, because there wasn’t a lot of dirt to stir up — as Carkeet depicts it, the town was no Peyton Place. If “sexpot” Linda was based on a real person, we never find out about it. Her prodigious bust and sexual avidity seem more likely products of male fantasy.

But the gap between fantasy and reality is precisely what interests Carkeet. He describes how, when he encountered a copy of Campus Sexpot 40 years after his first, fevered adolescent reading, the novel transported him instantly back “into a state of salacious ignorance.” For Carkeet, Koby’s book crystallizes the conflicts and contradic-

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Linda Franklin had not been to bed with every boy in the junior college of Wattsville, but at nineteen she had known physical intimacy with a high percentage of those boys who knew enough to appreciate her amply endowed body.

As first sentences go, it’s a good one. It treats Linda Franklin’s promiscuity like a familiar subject, it shows a touch of wit in its sober contradiction of a preposterous assertion (“had not been to bed with every boy in the junior college”), and its categorical precision (“a high percentage of those boys who…”) tells us we are in the hands of an author with a working mind.

But I did not see these strengths when I first read these words. I was fifteen years old, the year was 1962, and to me the opening sentence was a mounting wave that swelled to the climax of “amply endowed body.” To a small-town boy in 1962, “amply endowed body” was like two large breasts slapping him in the face.

I had come home late from an out-of-town wrestling match to find my mother, her cheeks aflame, reading Campus Sexpot. It was without a doubt her first and last smutty book. She was reading it because everyone else in town was reading it, and they were doing so because its author was a former local high school English teacher who had vanished in the middle of the school year and gone off to write a sexy pulp novel set in our little mountain community.

Many recognizable citizens, their names only slightly altered, misbehaved in its pages.

“This is terrible!” my mother declared from under her reading lamp, but she let me read it, and after I did, I burned it in the backyard incinerator. In those days, burning paper products outdoors was a regular practice.

Linda smiled and nodded to the many boys of her acquaintance as she walked down the aisle of the auditorium on the first day of school. Carolyn had saved her a seat in the section reserved for seniors.

The author’s fictional milieu gives him a little trouble here. Having chosen to locate his action in a junior college, he nonetheless retains the trappings of the actual high school behind the story: assembly on the first day of school, incongruous designations like “seniors.”

How could an author capable of such a good opening sentence be this clueless?

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Page 12005 | feature 41A 14-21,

tions that shaped his small-town coming of age: between “good” and “bad” kids, sex myths and sex facts, pious exteriors and grittier realities. To a kid whose birds-and-bees education consisted of an admonishment to remember that sex was an “act of love,” the novel’s clumsy, farfrom-explicit prose seemed intensely erotic, charged with the thrill of the unknown.

Burlington’s To account for the shock Lingerie Shop waves Campus Sexpot generated at the time, Carkeet has to recreUPSTAIRS ate a lost world, since nowadays, 73 Church St. any curious teen with access to Burlington basic cable can check out the 652-LACE threesomes on Nip/Tuck. To give us a sense of how it felt to 12/12/05 11:49:09 AM read the novel in 1962, and to 2x3-queen121405.indd 1 satisfy our own prurient curiosity, Carkeet alternates between 2x5-SoundVision110905 11/4/05 11:01 AM Page 1 excerpts from Koby’s book — printed in boldface — and his own commentary throughout the first several chapters of his memoir. It’s literary criticism like you’ve never read before.

Carkeet assesses Koby’s way with words, praising him when he manages to rise above his material, which is seldom. But he also reveals juicy, sometimes ironic connections between pulp and reality. For instance, a teacher in the book who confides, “I’ve spent my life being interested in girls with hot pants” is based on Carkeet’s faculty advisor for the Order of 2x4-bangkok112305 11/21/05 10:06 AM Page 1 DeMolay, a prestigious Masonic offshoot that engaged young 96.church.st burlington 864.2800 men in “somber rituals.”

In a publisher interview, 2x4-stella121405.indd 1 12/12/05 2:57:20 PM Carkeet says he imposed one “rule” on himself in writing the memoir: “I could talk about an event from my past only if it plausibly sprang from some reference in the original Campus Sexpot.” Restrictive as it may seem, this framework gives Carkeet the liberty to explore 2x6-imago112305 11/7/05 10:22 AM Page 1 quite a few aspects of his youth, including DeMolay — a “religion without a god” — reading habits in Sonora, sex jokes circa 1962, his fumbling efforts to gain sexual experience, and the “essential art” of coexisting with one’s enemies in a small town.

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Holy Monophony!

William Tortolano’s early-music enchantment

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ou can’t kill a good melody, they say.

Gregorian chant, a type of musical prayer established by and named for Pope Gregory I in 590 AD, certainly bears out this adage. While The Beatles’ “Yesterday” STORY has had a remarkable shelf life, its timeCASEY lessness can’t hold a votive candle to REA “Gloria in Excelsis Deo.” Dr. William Tortolano, a professor emeritus at St. IMAGE JORDAN Michael’s College, knows his chant, and SILVERMAN he shares his wisdom in a new instructional manual, A Gregorian Chant Handbook.

Gregorian Chant Written in clear, concise language, the Christmas Concert guide will help monophony enthusiasts featuring the learn, among other things, the difference Vermont Gregorian Chant Schola. St. between a podatus and a quilisma. As Michael’s College director of the Vermont Gregorian Chant Chapel, Colchester, Schola, Tortolano leads his venerable choDecember 18, 3 rus in a Christmas concert at St. Michael’s p.m. Donations.

College Chapel this Sunday.

Gregorian chant will probably never be A Gregorian Chant Handbook by Dr. heard on MTV. But mainstream music William Tortolano. stores have devoted more and more shelf GIA Publications, 67 pages, $9.95. space to early sacred music since the mid1990s chant craze put more pesos in the pockets of the Benedictine Monks of Santo Domingo de Silos. “There is a resurgence of interest,” confirms Tortolano, who is also an organist. “And it’s among young people, too. When I do my workshops, I have college-age people and teenagers who attend. And it’s not for nostalgia; it’s because they know it’s good music.”

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Not a bad comeback for material written before harmony had even been conceived.

In these troubling times — and what times aren’t? — no one can be blamed for craving soothing sounds. The majestic modalities of Gregorian chant have a meditative effect on listeners, regardless of religious upbringing. “People understand its validity,” Tortolano explains. “It’s recognized all over the world as a universal language. Just like Bach, you can’t destroy it. And it’s not just Roman Catholics; Protestants often sing the chant in English. It also has its roots in Jewish music,” he notes. “You don’t have to necessarily believe in the message to find it comforting, restful and beautiful.”

Not to downplay the spiritual substance of the music. Conceived as a way to honor God in song, there are chants for many masses and rituals. “It’s been very important in the church,” Tortolano says.

“There’s great poetry and sacred scripture from great authors like St. Francis of Assisi. In addition to the sound itself, chant has a good deal of literary beauty.

It’s durable.”

But chant doesn’t have to be sung in moldy European monasteries. Vermont has its own rich tradition of monophonic music making. In the ’90s, the Cabotbased vocal group Anima (now defunct)

SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | feature 43A

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Here’s an Opportunity for Change.

Basic MediationWorkshops Training Basic Mediation JANUARY 11-1414-17, Woodbury Montpelier January 2004College / Cost:in$645 Contact: Jen For Otis, jeno@woodbury-college.edu more information: 1-800-820-0442 or waynec@woodbury-college.edu The Dispute Resolution Center at released two albums featuring compositions by 11th-century abbess Hildegard von Bingen.

In 1998, St. Mike’s hosted an international conference on the occasion of her 900th birth-

Kane, a professional singer.

Their three children are all string players, and married to professional musicians. One plays with the United States Air Force Band, which regular-

While The Beatles’ “Yesterday” has had a remarkable shelf life, it can’t hold a votive candle to “Gloria in Excelsis Deo.” day. Britney Spears should be so lucky.

Tortolano, 75, is a diminutive man with intelligent eyes and a warm smile. He’s also a delightful conversationalist, particularly if you’re talking about music. He lives in Underhill with his wife Martha

ly performs at White House functions. Another is in the Virginia Symphony and popular rock/classical crossover group the Trans Siberian Orchestra. The third teaches cello at the Toronto Conservatory of Music.

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what they do,â&#x20AC;? Tortolano says, beaming.

Tortolano first heard chant when he was in college. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It was my undergraduate days,â&#x20AC;? he recalls. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Someone invited me to a monastery, and when I heard it, I was mesmerized.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been a part of my life ever since.â&#x20AC;? Soon after accepting a teaching post at St. Michaelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in 1960, he became involved in the chapelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s singing service. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The priests in training had a religious house and that was their monastery, and I taught the chant there,â&#x20AC;? he says.

Chant has had its place at the school even outside the cloister. â&#x20AC;&#x153;All the years Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been here, there has been a chorus group, and they always included it in their repertoire,â&#x20AC;?

Chant contains some of the most powerful melodies in musical history.

Amazingly, little about the form has changed since Pope Gregoryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s time.

Tortolano says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;They sang Mozart, show tunes, folk music, Bach . . . But they always performed chant. And this wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just because of religious tradition. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s because itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s great music.â&#x20AC;?

Chant has acquired many fans, but few have actually sung it. Tortolano believes that performing Gregorian chant is its own reward. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a wonderful experience,â&#x20AC;? he enthuses. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It teaches you very good control of your breathing and diction. And, since itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s so uniform, you learn how to blend individual sounds as one. It helps with posture, and even attitude. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a very healthy kind of singing.â&#x20AC;?

Without doubt, chant contains some of the most powerful melodies in musical history. Amazingly, little about the

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form has changed since Pope Gregoryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s time. â&#x20AC;&#x153;People ask if you can compose chant today, and the answer is yes,â&#x20AC;?

Tortolano says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;But very few people are. There are so many thousands of good melodies that we donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t really need more. But you can do it.

Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d just have to be really good at it.â&#x20AC;?

Tortolano, who is fluent in Italian and French, published an earlier guide to chant, in 1988 â&#x20AC;&#x201D; his translation of Dom Eugene Cardineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Beginning Studies in Gregorian Chant. Cardine, who issued his version in 1975, was a Benedictine monk at the Abbey of St. Pierre de Solesmes in France.

Tortolanoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s rewording was the first chant textbook to appear in English since 1965. â&#x20AC;&#x153;There had been nothing since [the papal reforms of] Vatican II,â&#x20AC;? he notes.

His latest effort provides basic training along with examples of chants ranging from the simple to the complex. â&#x20AC;&#x153;My new book not only instructs you, but it also contains a good 60 pieces that a beginning choir or congregation can sing,â&#x20AC;? Tortolano says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a practical workbook.â&#x20AC;?

Figuring out ancient square-note notation might be challenging without a competent guide, but Tortolano believes all you need is a little friendly direction. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not that difficult, actually,â&#x20AC;? he says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It has lines and spaces. It does have square notes, but notes can be round or square or diamondshaped. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re just used to round ones. In the book,â&#x20AC;? he continues, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I try to approach it very simply. I give examples of how each passage would look in modern notation. You just get used to it after a while.â&#x20AC;?

One interesting aspect of Gregorian chant is its lack of time and key signatures.

While the intervals remain constant, singers are free to start on any pitch thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s comfortable to them. Of course, it helps if they all agree. â&#x20AC;&#x153;For beginners it might be easier to start on a suggested pitch,â&#x20AC;?

Tortolano admits. â&#x20AC;&#x153;But you can sing it in any key you want.â&#x20AC;?

Freely rhythmic, chant notation contains markings to indicate the ebb and flow of the melody. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Because it doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have a strict meter, it reflects the pulse of the text,â&#x20AC;? he explains. â&#x20AC;&#x153;One sound is not a rhythm, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a noise.

Two or three can be a rhythm. We conduct it like a wave going up and down,â&#x20AC;?

Tortolano says.

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Ă&#x192;Â&#x17D;Â&#x2C6;Â?i>Ă&#x192;Â&#x2C6;Â&#x2DC;}°VÂ&#x153;Â&#x201C; 12/5/05 1:55:46 PM

Minutes Away!

Come for a great lunch or weekend brunch in a relaxed Williston atmosphere.

Homemade baked goods Gift Certificates Available We serve Uncommon Grounds Coffee 7921 WILLISTON RD, WILLISTON VILLAGE (ACROSS FROM TOWN 3x4-blinkinglight121405 12/13/05 4:06 PM PageHALL) 1

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Hours: Tue-Fri 7am-2:30pm â&#x20AC;˘ Sat & Sun Brunch 8am-2:30pm

People ask if you can compose chant today, and the answer is yes. But very few people are. There are so many thousands of good melodies that we donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t really need more.

Blinking Light Gallery

holiday sale Sometimes you have to go out of the way to find the perfect gift.

WILLIAM TORTOLANO

ten it right? â&#x20AC;&#x153;We donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t, exactly,â&#x20AC;? he concedes. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We know from commentary in ancient books that tell us about how they sang it. We know from whatever vocal traditions continue over the centuries, although some may have been corrupted. From there, we follow our instinct for notation.â&#x20AC;?

Despite his manualâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s scholarly import, Tortolano didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t write it as an academic exercise. â&#x20AC;&#x153;There was a demand for it,â&#x20AC;? he says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Otherwise teaching chant would involve using old instruction books, doing it by hand, and endlessly photocopying things.â&#x20AC;? Apparently, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a healthy market for such a work. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s doing very well,â&#x20AC;?

Tortolano relates. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not going to get rich from it, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s moving.â&#x20AC;?

The Vermont Gregorian Chant Schola features solely male voices, but thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no rule barring mixed-gender choruses. â&#x20AC;&#x153;If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re singing with a congregation, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s mixed,â&#x20AC;? explains Tortolano. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a large group in Worcester, Massachusetts, that features

men and women singing the chant. Those looking for the purely traditional sound know that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s better to have just men or just womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s voices . . . Of course, if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re in a monastery, the choice is made.â&#x20AC;?

An all-male ensemble just happens to be what Tortolano prefers, at least for now. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I love the women, and you can quote me on that,â&#x20AC;? he jokes. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just at this moment, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m interested in achieving this particular sound.â&#x20AC;?

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s one that goes well with the holiday season. The upcoming concert at St. Mikeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s will be an old-fashioned display of devotional melody in keeping with the spirit of Christmas. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The choir will be vested, and theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll come in procession,â&#x20AC;? Tortolano says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a lot of beauty and drama. And in addition to the Gregorian chant, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll also be singing some Christmas carols. We have an optional donation to the Edmundite Katrina Relief Fund,â&#x20AC;? he adds. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going to be a nice concert.â&#x20AC;?

Hallelujah. m

Unique Crafts, Fine Arts, Books & Music

by Local Artists Open now through December 31 â&#x20AC;˘ Closed Mondays & Tuesdays

in the Old River Run Restaurant â&#x20AC;˘ Plainfield

48A

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december 14-21, 2005

Š 2005 Anheuser-Busch, Inc., St. Louis, MO

|

SEVEN DAYS

SEVEN DAYS

www.sevendaysvt.com/music

|

december 14-21, 2005| music 49A

<music>

THU

MIXED NUTS :: If you’ve caught the holiday humbug, the

15

Christmas season means long checkout lines and infuriatingly catchy carols.

Luckily, there’s an alternative:

Charles, Dead or Alive?’s

annual performance of Tchaikovsky’s Nutcracker Suite can help you exorcise that inner Grinch. The innovative trio twists the Yuletide opus into exciting, post-rock forms with discipline, intensity and irreverent humor.

Join the festivities this Thursday at Club Metronome. Burlington indie songstress Missy Bly opens.

<music>

2x3-advance121405

12/12/05

11:02 AM

Club listings & spotlights are written by Casey Rea. Spotlights are at the discretion of the editor. Send listings by Friday at noon, including info phone number, to clubs@sevendaysvt.com. Find past album reviews, full2x2.5-pjc121405 venue descriptions and 12/12/05 a local artists’ 10:51 directoryAM online at 1 Page www.sevendaysvt.com/music.

Page 1

M UNANY G DE IF R $ TS 10

Perfect Fair Trade Gifts for everyone on your list!

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MUSIC LESSONS!

Alpaca Sweaters, Ponchos, Hats, Mittens, Socks, Organic coffee, chocolate and other foods, Holiday cards, Books and Bread & Puppet calendars

Guitar • Bass • Drums • Voice • Piano

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Gift Certificates good for any type of lesson!

fri 12/9 10pm $3

Professional Teaching Staff • Free Clinics & Workshops

greg izor band

It’s all about the music

12/13/05

4:18 PM

Page 1

Open Seven Days • 863-8326 • 21 Church Street, Burlington

(new orleans jazz)

Burlington’s local choice since 1982.

Advance Music • 75 Maple Street • Burlington • 863-8652 • www.advancemusicvt.com

sat 12/10 10pm FREE

live local djs spinning reggae/hip-hop tue 12/13 10pm free

movie night:

1x4-onehalfWEEKLY 12/13/05 the grinch

We’ve got something for everyone!

2x5-cmyk-sexsecrets

1/2 LOUNGE

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Steaks • Chicken •Seafood • Pasta Ribs • Salads • Full Bar • Fine Wines

Psst.

3:38 PM

Seven Days Sex Issue February 1

Page 1

Got a drawer full of panties purloined from ex-girlfriends?

12/13/05 10:25:30 AM

Small Food. Big Drinks.

Wed.12.14/9pm DAROLINE (original sax & guitar)

Some other sex secret you wish you could tell?

Thu.12.15/9pm

Sunday Brunch Live Music Wed Nights with

Chad Hollister Kids Menu Available Family Owned & Operated

WOMEN EXPOSED IN FOLK, FASHION & ROCK ‘N ROLL (members of Missy Bly, The Cush, The Cave Bees, Daroline, The Lavas & Ryan Power Trio) Sat.12.17/7pm KIP

MEAKER (blues)

Sun.12.18/8pm

BROOKSIE’S 30TH B-DAY PARTY! WITH A-DOG Mon.12.19/10pm • Jah Red presents LATINO HEAT (salsa/merengue/bachata) Tue.12.20/9pm

BILL MULLINS & FRIENDS (rock) Wed.12.21/9pm

NICHOLAS CASSARINO TRIO

Located at Exit 16 off Route 89 Next to the Hampton Inn by Costco Open Daily 11:30am ‘til Midnight.

2x5-tbones120705.indd 1

12/1/05 12:19:39 PM

(jazz fusion) Thu.12.22/9pm

AARON FLINN (“Salad Days” singer-songwriter)

1361/2 CHURCH STREET 865.0012

Seven Days

wants to hear about it!

We’ll spill the beans — anonymously, of course — in our Sex Issue, February 1, 2006. Don’t worry about length or language. Just come clean. Or dirty. We’ll do the rest.

Send us your sex secrets by January 27.

Online at sevendaysvt.com sex@sevendaysvt.com or mail to Sex Secrets, Seven Days P.O. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402

50A

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december 14-21, 2005

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SEVEN DAYS

sound bites

Got music news? Email Casey Rea at casey@sevendaysvt.com.

7D.blogs.com/solidstate for more music news & views.

BY CASEY REA

SPIDER MEN

BACKWOODS BIZARRE

In case you were wondering, Seven Daysâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; first Hot Ticket event at Higher Ground last Wednesday went swimmingly. The concert featured the Big Apple-based trio Tarantula A.D., whose darkly visceral chamber metal is making waves in the underground. Taking the stage

Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been a lot of buzz in the music press about â&#x20AC;&#x153;New Weird America,â&#x20AC;? a catchall descriptor for sounds ranging from neo-cabaret to acid-folk. Well, here in Burlington, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got what I call â&#x20AC;&#x153;New Weird Americana,â&#x20AC;? a curious hybrid of indie-rock, country and singer-songwriter forms.

Last Thursday, I caught a show at Higher Ground featuring Buffalo DANNY BENSI Springsteen, Will and Mickey Western.

Although they all share a taste for twang, each band takes a unique approach to country tradition. Buffalo have a strong Winooski-based multimedia design company New Breed Marketing is sense of honky-tonk history, delivering currently working on an interesting project for UVM. According to New heartfelt tales of beers â&#x20AC;&#x2122;nâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; tears with an Breed designer Dan Munzing, who also plays bass in Akrasia (see unassuming Western chic. While their sound above), the company is creating a website for the university that aims is resolutely antique, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s great to hear origto serve the local independent music community. inals in the style. â&#x20AC;&#x153;In a nutshell, the site will give a bunch of free Will are playfully publicity to local unsigned acts, all paid for by earnest, serving up backUVM,â&#x20AC;? Munzing says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;In addition to the website, all beat-heavy tunes with a of the bands involved will be featured on a compilarustic heart and firm rock tion that UVM will distribute to students.â&#x20AC;? roots. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s always fun to Something tells me it will also get some spins on watch them win over a WRUV. You have until Friday, crowd that hasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t heard Organizers are still recruiting bands to particiDec. 16, at noon to get any them before; by the midpate. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going pretty well, though. In addition music-related info to me dle of their set, they were to Munzingâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s group, local faves The Cush, The before we take our holiday eliciting enthusiastic Jazz Guys and Fire the Cannons are already break. So get on it, or risk hoots and hollers from the on board. So if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re a local artist and havenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t coal in your stockings. audience. yet signed to Sony, point your browser to Mickey Western came http://www.uvmrocks.com. across like â&#x20AC;&#x2122;70s-era Bob Dylan making a dark deal at the crossroads. Mickey & company played loose and off the cuff; their music is blurry, psychedelic and subtly menacing. The coolest part of their set was the Beleaguered Winooski residents can finally breathe projection of vintage Western films across the stage. easy now that the first phase of the downtown redeIt was as if John Wayne ate the brown acid. velopment has been completed. Hey, at least it wasAlthough attendance was somewhat slim, the nâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t as bad as Bostonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Big Dig. And Onion City peeps show was a fine representation of at least part of can now celebrate the townâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s new look in a favorite the new B-town scene.

Main St. haunt.

Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s right: Beloved nightspot Monkey House, which closed last August due to major construction According to a source, Grace Potter & the Nocturnals recently peron its doorstep, has re-opened for business. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not just good news formed in a rather unusual venue in Chicago. Seems the band was for boozehounds, but for local musicians as well. At the moment, stuck in an airplane due to inclement weather, and entertained a capspace-jazz ensemble Intergalactic Taxi entertain every Thursday; tive audience with an impromptu concert.

Friday nights will feature a revolving cast of local acts.

While waiting five hours for the de-icing crew to ready the plane The bar, currently open Wednesday through Saturday, will move to for takeoff, Potter entertained the passengers in her inimitably affable a seven-day schedule starting on January 1. m manner, singing the title track from their most recent album Nothing But the Water over the planeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s intercom system. Lord knows sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s got powerful pipes, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s probably hard to find the â&#x20AC;&#x153;sweet spotâ&#x20AC;? on an airplane PA. 1x6-hosp120705 11:31 AM 1x6-redsquare121405.qxd 12/13/05 9:17 AM Page11/21/05 1 1x6-rustynail121405 12/12/05 1:00 PM Page 1

Sometime before takeoff, the band gave away tickets to their February concert at the Barre Opera House â&#x20AC;&#x201D; not a bad score, considering the show is a guaranteed sell-out.

Nocturnals drummer Matthew Burr recently confirmed the unusual tale, adding some new info. Apparently there were a couple of other notables on the craft, including actor (and Vermonter) Luis Guzman and ex-Phish, current Trey Anastasio lighting designer Chris Kuroda. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It was like a cocktail party without the cocktails,â&#x20AC;? he says.

Sounds like a party to me. If this music thing doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t work out, maybe Potter can get a gig as a singing flight attendant.

SONIC TUITION

BY THE TIME YOU READ THISâ&#x20AC;Ś

Page 1

4FSPQB?W

Monday

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wednesday CORONAS $2.00

thursday MARGARITAS $3.00

Thursday, Dec. 15 Jazz Dinner

FT. Kate Paradise followed by

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HAPPY HOUR! 1/2 price Appetizers 4-6 Monday - Friday www.mexacalivt.com Taft Corners Shopping Center, Williston 879-9492

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Dave Grippo Funk Band w. A-Dog Saturday, Dec. 17

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amidst what looked like giant shrubbery, the band played entrancing tunes that went from a whisper to a scream. Cellist Danny Bensi â&#x20AC;&#x201D; whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a dead ringer for actor-comedian Will Farrell â&#x20AC;&#x201D; coaxed sounds from the instrument that I hadnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t thought possible. Flanked by drummer Gregory Rogove and guitarist Saunder Jurriaans, he moved through delicate classical motifs and hair-raising metal with nimble authority. Their mix of orchestral thunder and atonal menace sounded a bit like Red-era King Crimson â&#x20AC;&#x201D; never a bad thing. Occasionally the group ventured into the psych-folk territory of their NYC brethren such as Devendra Banhart. If they continue to develop their sound, Tarantula A.D. may become the first post-metal, neo-classical, acidfolk act in the country. Guess theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll need their own section in record stores.

Local openers Akrasia not only impressed the audience, but the headliners as well. At one point during their set, T.A.D. thanked Akrasia for playing, saying it was â&#x20AC;&#x153;an honor to share the stage with them.â&#x20AC;? Burlington, represent!

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2xFP-HG121405

12/13/05

SEVEN DAYS

1:07 PM |

Page 1

december 14-21, 2005| music 51A

<clubdates> AA = ALL AGES NC = NO COVER

WED.14 THU.15 :: burlington area

:: burlington area

IRISH SESSIONS, Radio Bean, 9 p.m. NC. PINE STREET JAZZ WITH MATT WRIGHT, Parima, 7 p.m. NC. TOP HAT KARAOKE, 135 Pearl, 9 p.m. NC. TERRI CONTI (jazz), Leunig’s, 7 p.m. NC. NICK CASSARINO & FRIENDS (jazz), Red Square, 8 p.m. NC, followed by MEMBERS ONLY WITH FATTIE B. (’80s DJ), 11 p.m. NC. DAROLINE (original sax & guitar), 1/2 Lounge, 9 p.m. NC. TURKEY BOUILLON MAFIA, COLOR & TALEA (jazz, funk, jam), Nectar’s, 9 p.m. $5/8. 18+.

OPEN MIKE WITH ANDY LUGO & DJ TRANSPLANTE, Manhattan Pizza & Pub, 10 p.m. NC. DAVE HARRISON’S STARSTRUCK KARAOKE, JP’s Pub, 10 p.m. NC. KARAOKE CONTEST, Foggy’s Notion, 9 p.m. NC. POETRY READING & OPEN MIKE, Euro Gourmet, 6 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Geno’s Karaoke Club, from 8 p.m. NC. CHAD HOLLISTER (singer-songwriter), T-Bones, 7:30 p.m. NC.

SHANE HARDIMAN TRIO (jazz), Radio Bean, 7 p.m. NC, followed by MEOWSKERS (singer-songwriter), 9 p.m. NC, followed by ANTHONY SANTOR TRIO (jazz), 10 p.m. NC. 80S NIGHT WITH DJ CHIA, 135 Pearl, 10 p.m. NC. SIESTA BEATS, Miguel’s Stoweaway, 10 p.m. NC. FRIENDS OF JOE WITH DENNIS WILLMOTT (jazz, blues), Halvorson’s, 9 p.m. NC. ELLEN POWELL & PATRICIA JULIEN (jazz), Leunig’s, 7 p.m. NC. TRINITY (Irish), Rí Rá Irish Pub, 5 p.m.

NC, followed by SETH YACOVONE (blues, rock singer-songwriter), 10 p.m. NC. A-DOG PRESENTS, Red Square, 10 p.m.

NC. GABBY & MISSY (singer-songwriters), 1/2 Lounge, 9 p.m. NC. THE BRIXTON GUNS, LAZLO HOLLYFIELD (reggae, rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. CHARLES, DEAD OR ALIVE?, MISSY BLY, FOLKLORE (rock, Nutcracker Suite), Club Metronome, 9:30 p.m. $5. :: champlain valley TOP HAT ENTERTAINMENT DANCE PARTY (hip-hop, r&b DJs), LADIES’ NIGHT, City Limits, 9 p.m. NC. Rasputin’s, 10 p.m. NC. BANG BANG WITH DJS JAH RED & :: central DEMUS (reggae, reggaeton), Second JAY EKIS (worldbeat, rock singer-songFloor, 10 p.m. $5/NC. 18+ before writer), Charlie O’s, 10 p.m. NC. 11 p.m.

OPEN MIKE, Langdon St. Café, 7 p.m.

C-LOW (hip-hop DJ), Ruben James, NC. 10 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE WITH LINDA WARNAAR, FOLK MUSIC WITH RYAN FARBER & Middle Earth, 8:30 p.m. $3.

GUESTS, European Gourmet, 7 p.m. NC. SHAUN & SHELBY (singer-songwriter), :: northern Upper Deck Pub, Windjammer, 7 p.m.

TOM LESHINSKI (solo guitar), Chow!

NC. Bella, 6 p.m. NC. INTERGALACTIC TAXI (jazz fusion), OPEN MIKE, Overtime Saloon, 9 p.m. NC. Monkey House, 9 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE WITH THE INFAMOUS KARAOKE WITH BONNIE, Park Place BLUES BAND, Monopole, 9 p.m. NC. Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. TERRY DIERS (r&b, gospel), Bee’s KARAOKE, Geno’s Karaoke Club, from Knees, 7:30 p.m. NC. 6 p.m. NC. 1x6-vtpub112305 11/22/05 11:05 AM Page 1

SUPERSOUNDS DJ (dance party, game show), Lincoln Inn Tavern, 8 p.m. NC. KARAOKE WITH REX, Franny O’s, 9 p.m. NC.

:: champlain valley MITCH TERRICCIANO (folk-rock), Bobcat Café, 8 p.m. NC. LIVE DJ, Two Brothers Tavern, 9 p.m.

NC.

:: central BELLATRIX (Celtic, folk), Langdon St. Café, 8 p.m. $5 suggested donation.

MADDUB (dub reggae, fusion), Charlie O’s, 10 p.m. NC.

:: northern KARAOKE WITH TIM RUSSELLE, Overtime Saloon, 7:30 p.m. NC. MARK ABAIR & THE METROS (classic rock), Sami’s Harmony Pub, 9 p.m.

NC. EL DUCE (rock), Monopole, 9 p.m. NC. SKUNKHOLLOW (old-time), Bee’s Knees, 7:30 p.m. NC. LADIES’ NIGHT WITH DJS ROBBY ROB & SKIPPY (hip-hop, r&b), Tabu Café & Nightclub, 9 p.m. NC.

FRI.16 :: burlington area ALEX TOTH GROUP (jazz jam), Radio Bean, 8 p.m. NC, followed by CLEARY BROTHERS (bluegrass), 9 p.m. NC. HOT HOUSE JAZZ, Parima, 8 p.m. NC. DJS PRECIOUS & PHILLIP (dance, house), 135 Pearl, 10 p.m. $5.

DJ COREY (hip-hop), Rí Rá Irish Pub, 10 p.m. NC. DJ A-DOG (roots reggae), Red Square, 5 p.m. NC, followed by VORCZA (progressive jazz, groove), 8 p.m. $3, followed by NASTEE (hip-hop), midnight. $3.

FRI.16 >> 52A

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REV. BOB LEVY, JIM FLORENTINE CRAIG GASS, RICHARD CHRISTY SAL THE STOCKBROKER & GARY THE RETARD SUN, DEC 18 $8 ADVANCE $10 DAY OF SHOW | DOORS 7PM CD RELEASE PARTY, FREE CD WITH WIZARD CARD

COMEDY: BRIAN MCKIM, TRACI SKENE

JOHN TOWER GROUP

MADCOW PRODUCTIONS & SHALLOW BREATH RECORDS PRESENT

LOWELL THOMPSON

RIVERWALK RECORDS 20% Off all vinyl!

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FRIDAY, DEC 23 $7 ADVANCE $9 DAY OF SHOW MARIO HERRERA PRESENTS, IN ASSOC. WITH ROSITAS MEXICAN RESTAURANT AND MORAN CONSTRUCTION CO.

CHRISTMAS PARTY FEAT. JAHRED (REGGAETON), DJ DEMUS (REGGAE), & DJ RAUL (EXCITING LATIN) TUES, DEC 27 $10 ADVANCE $12 DOS | DOORS 6PM

PAUL GREEN’S

SCHOOL OF ROCK ALLSTARS 11:09 AM

Page 1

THURS, DEC 29 $8 ADVANCE $10 DOS | DOORS 7PM

223-3334 Post comment cards RYAN MONTBLEAU BAND 30 STATE ST. MONTPELIER for over 600 Vermont PETER PRINCE & FRIENDS restaurants and clubs 1x2-riverwalk111605.indd 1 FRIDAY, DECEMBER 30 $6 AT DOOR 11/14/05 9:53:41 AM 99.9 THE BUZZ & HARPOON WELCOME and win prizes!

1x6-7Ngeneric-gray.indd 1

We’re right across the street from Higher Ground.

Ask for our special “Event Rate”.

TUES, JANUARY 24 $10 ADVANCE $10 DOS DOORS 6:30PM

FIVE SECONDS EXPIRED BLINDED BY RAGE, TRAGIC FALLACY, LIFE WITHOUT FRIDAY, JANUARY 27 $15 ADVANCE $20 DAY OF SHOW

STRANGEFOLK FRI, JAN 27 $6 ADV $6 DAY OF SHOW | DOORS 7PM | ALL AGES ESSEX CHIPS/STOMPING GROUND PRESENTS

UNITE THE MIC 2: FREESTYLE RAP BATTLE PROMOTING DIVERSITY & TOLERANCE AMONGST YOUTH SAT, JAN 28 $15 ADV $17 DAY OF SHOW | ALL AGES 104.7 THE POINT & LONG TRAIL WELCOME

MELISSA FERRICK ERIN MCKEOWN SAT, JAN 28 $8 ADV $10 DAY OF SHOW | ALL AGES

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THURSDAY, DECEMBER 29 $20 ADVANCE $22 DAY OF SHOW FRIDAY, DECEMBER 30 $20 ADVANCE $22 DAY OF SHOW SATURDAY, DECEMBER 31 SOLD OUT!!

& ROLL SOLDIERS, DAMONE FRIDAY, FEB 3 $16 ADV $18 DAY OF SHOW 106.7 WIZN WELCOMES

DARK STAR APRIL WINE ORCHESTRA AIMEE MANN GLENGARRY BHOYS VALENTINE’S PARTY TIM O’BRIEN DANCE FEAT. KIMBOLOKO WED, FEB 8 $25 ADV $27 DOS | ALL AGES | DOORS 7PM

SAT, JAN 14 $15 ADVANCE $17 DOS | DOORS 7PM | ALL AGES

FRIDAY, FEB 10 $15 ADV $15 DOS | ALL AGES

SUN, JANUARY 15 $15 ADVANCE $17 DOS | DOORS 7PM SEATED SHOW

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W/ DJ HECTOR ‘EL SALSERO’ COBEO

JUGTOWN PIRATES FREE SALA/MERENGUE DANCE LESSONS: 8PM OF THE LAKE CHAMPLAIN SOULVATION ARMY LEZ ZEPELLIN

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FRIDAY, FEB 17 $10 ADV $12 DAY OF SHOW 106.7 WIZN WELCOMES

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DESIGNATED HOTEL?

SATURDAY, JANUARY 21 $14 ADVANCE $16 DAY OF SHOW TWO SEATED SHOWS: 7:30 & 10PM SHECKYMAGAZINE.COM WELCOMES

1285 Williston Rd S. Burlington

(802) 865-3400 12/1/05 3:35:12 PM

TICKETS AVAILABLE AT WWW.HIGHERGROUNDMUSIC.COM, HG BOX OFFICE (M-F 11am-6pm), PURE POP, PEACOCK MUSIC, or call 888.512.SHOW

WWW.HIGHERGROUNDMUSIC.COM

1xfp-nectars121405

52A

|

12/13/05

december 14-21, 2005

10:36 AM |

Page 1

SEVEN DAYS

<clubdates> fresh music served daily AA = ALL AGES NC = NO COVER

TURKEY TONIGHT! BOUILLON MAFIA W. COLOR AND TALEA

THU 15

THE BRIXTON GUNS W. LAZLO HOLLYFELD TURKEY BOUILLON MAFIA

WED 14 W. COLOR AND TALEA NEW YEARS EVE PREVIEW! EARLY SHOW ACOUSTIC SHOWCASE FEATURING BILLY CALDWELL, RYAN A., AND ANNA 7-9PM

THE BRIXTON GUNS

THU 15 W. LAZLO HOLLYFELD

SAT

17

THE BREAKFAST

FRI 16 W. THE HUNTINGTON PROJECT SETH YACOVONE 7-9PM SAT WCLX PRESENTS THE RETURN OF 17 (EARLY 6-10) WITH POJAZZ (TICKETS AT 86-FLYNN)

SAVOY BROWN

11PM: GREG IZOR BLUES BAND

OPEN BAND NIGHT!

MON 19

SETH YACOVONE (blues, rock singersongwriter), Nectar’s, 7 p.m. NC, followed by THE BREAKFAST, HUNTINGTON PROJECT (funk, jam, fusion), 9 p.m. $3.

HOLIDAY HO-DOWN WITH THE CHROME COWBOYS (country-rock), Club Metronome, 8 p.m. NC. ARCHITECT, BURY YOUR DEAD, SINCE THE FLOOD, TIRED OF TRYING, OVER THE TOP, THOSE NOT ON THE LIST (punk, hardcore), 242 Main, 7 p.m. $6. AA. TOP HAT DANCETERIA (DJs), Rasputin’s, 10 p.m. $3.

FLAVA WITH DJS ROBBIE J. & TOXIC (urban dance party), Second Floor, 9 p.m. $3/10. 18+ before 11 p.m.

HIP-HOP, REGGAE, DANCEHALL DJS, Ruben James, 10 p.m. NC. DAVE HARRISON’S STARSTRUCK KARAOKE, JP’s Pub, 10 p.m. NC. ANDRIC SEVERANCE TRIO (jazz), Wine Bar at Wine Works, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE KAPERS (host Bob Bolyard), St. John’s Club, 7 p.m. NC. VIDEO DANCE PARTY WITH VJ HOT ROD, Foggy’s Notion, 9 p.m. NC. LOBOT (rock), Monkey House, 9:30 p.m. $3.

KARAOKE WITH MR. DJ, Champlain Lanes Family Fun Center, 8:30 p.m.

NC. AA. KARAOKE WITH PETER BOARDMAN, Backstage Pub, 9 p.m. NC. MR. FRENCH (rock), Lincoln Inn Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, Geno’s Karaoke Club, from 6 p.m. NC. NIGHT TRAIN (rock), Franny O’s, 9 p.m.

NC.

:: champlain valley

ENGINE THAT COULD :: Vermont rockers 8084 have been rolling along since the early ’80s, but they’ve yet to run out of track. This weekend the band celebrates the release of its latest disc, The Last

SUN 18 WE PROVIDE THE BACK LINE. COME DOWN AND JAM, SIGN-UP 7:30PM

FRI.16 << 51A

Great Train. Filled with melodic, textured pop, the new album puts a mature spin on the band’s signature sound.

But that doesn’t mean they’ve gone soft: Keyboardist/vocalist Randy Smith and guitarist Andre Maquera still

MOVIE NIGHT:

deliver plenty of dynamic dazzle. Help 8084 honor their past and embrace the future this Saturday at the Second

HOW THE GRINCH STOLE XMAS FOLLOWED BY ELF

Floor nightclub in Burlington.

1x6-trackside121405

12/13/05

1x6-2ndfloor121405 10:32 AM Page 1

12/13/05

CHRISTMAS PARTY WITH STUR CRAZIE (rock), City Limits, 9 p.m. NC. STARLINE RHYTHM BOYS (honky-tonk, rockabilly), Two Brothers Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. DJ CHARLIE (rock), Red Mill Restaurant, 10:15 p.m. NC.

:: central

ABBY JENNE BAND (rock), Charlie O’s, 10 p.m.

9:34 AM NC. Page 1 1x6-parima121405 12/13/05 9:29 A

THEN WRUV DJS

MONACO AND DJ BLIND TUE 20 WED 21

BLUESDAY (SEE BELOW) JAPHY RYDER WITH DJ ZJ

Lincoln Inn

1VC (SJMM

T U E S D AY Bluegrass Night!

EVERY TUESDAY:

Bluesday OPEN BLUES JAM WITH THE NERBAK BROTHERS –

7:30pm-9:30pm

Trivia 7:30-9:30

T H U R S D AY

prizes and specials FRIDAY EARLY:

104.7 The Point Ladies Night Video Dance Party

Seth Yacovone Solo

w/ Top Hat Entertainment

8pm-11pm

free fries, 7-9

@ N E C T A R ’S

NEW YEARS EVE EXTRAVAGANZA WITH TURKEY BOUILLON MAFIA

F R I D AY Star 92.9 Work Escape Party

wednesday.12/14,7:00pm www.tracksidevt.com

JAPHY RYDER WITH DJZJ THE GORDON STONE BAND JASON CORBIERE’S BLUES HOLIDAY THE MIDDLE EIGHT RETURNS TO BURLINGTON, WITH FANCY TRASH GRUPO SABOR THE SAMPLES

658-4771 • all shows at 9pm main street burlington

— FRIDAY 12/16 — — SATURDAY 12/17 —

SAND BLIZZARD — SUNDAYS —

4-7pm

NFL

Mr. French

Sunday Ticket FREE BBQ!

9pm-midnight

TIX ON SALE NOW AT NECTAR’S AND THE FLYNN $12 ADVANCE $17 DAY OF. CALL FOR VIP SEATING.

1/21 2/5

W E D N E S D AY Trivia Mania w/ Top Hat Entertainment

EVERY THURSDAY:

12/21 12/23 12/25 12/30

Dinner & Live Music

w/ Blue Norther 7:30pm-10:30pm

OPEN JAM FOR EXPERIENCED MUSICIANS. $4.50 LABATTS PITCHERS

UPCOMING

BURLINGTON’S MOST ORIGINAL AND AUTHENTIC THAI CUISINE

S AT U R D AY

Jim Branca Band 9pm-midnight

Five Corners Essex Junction 878-3309 www.lincolninn.net

1x6-lincolninnSTANDARD.indd 1

12/9/05 4:21:36 PM

— EVERYDAY — $ 3 Pitchers Molson Canadian, Bud & Bud Light 12 Mallets Bay Ave Winooski 655-9542

Pine Street

Jazz w/maTt wright friday.12/16,8:00pm

hot house jazz nyc jazz sensations saturday.12/17,8:00pm

MADERA (Flamenco) friday.12/23,7:00pm

a gift of music & dance 7pm: All-star jazz concert 10pm: latin dance holiday social

new year’s eve ball! $8/10 RSVP recommended NEVER A COVER CHARGE! 185 PEARL STREET 864-7917 WWW.PARIMATHAI.COM

1x15-metronomeWEEKLY

SEVEN DAYS

|

12/13/05

december 14-21, 2005| music 53A

venues 411 Akes’ Place, 134 Church St., Burlington, 864-8111.

American Flatbread, 115 St. Paul St., Burlington, 861-2999.

Ashley’s, Merchant’s Row, Randolph, 728-9182.

Backstage Pub, 60 Pearl St., Essex Jct., 878-5494.

Backstreet, 17 Hudson St., St. Albans, 527-2400.

Bad Girls Café, Main St., Johnson, 635-7025.

Ball & Chain Café, 16 Park St., Brandon, 247-0050.

Banana Winds Café & Pub 1 Towne Marketplace, Essex Jct., 879-0752.

Barre Opera House, 6 North Main St., Barre, 476-8188.

Basin Harbor Club, 4800 Basin Harbor Drive, Vergennes, 1-800-622-4000.

Bayside Pavilion, 13 Georgia Shore Rd., St. Albans, 524-0909.

Bee’s Knees, 82 Lower Main St., Morrisville, 888-7889.

Beyond Infinity Upstairs, 43 Center St., Brandon, 247-5100.

Big Moose Pub at the Fire & Ice Restaurant, 28 Seymour St., Middlebury, 388-0361.

Black Bear Tavern & Grill, 205 Hastings Hill, St. Johnsbury, 748-1428.

Black Door Bar & Bistro, 44 Main St., Montpelier, 223-7070.

The Bobcat Café, 5 Main St., Bristol, 453-3311.

PAUL DOUSE (rock singer-songwriter), Borders Books & Music, 29 Church St., Burlington, 865-2711.

Overtime Saloon, 7:30 p.m. NC. Breakwater Café, 1 King St., Burlington, 658-6276.

PULSE (r&b), Monopole, 9 p.m. NC. The Brewski, Rt. 108, Jeffersonville, 644-6366.

B.U. Emporium, 163 Porters Point Rd., Colchester, 658-4292.

VIP LADIES’ NIGHT WITH DJ SKIPPY Bundy Center for the Arts, Rt. 100, Waitsfield, 496-4781. (top 40, r&b, reggae), Tabu Café & Buono’s Lounge, 3182 Shelburne Rd., Shelburne, 985-2232.

Nightclub, 9 p.m. NC. 18+.

Capitol Grounds, 45 State St., Montpelier, 223-7800.

Champlain Lanes Family Fun Center, 2630 Shelburne Rd., Shelburne, DAVE GRIPPO FUNK BAND, Rusty Nail, 985-2576.

10 p.m. $5.

Charlemont Restaurant, #116, Rt. 100, Morrisville, 888-4242.

JOSH GOULD (jazz), Bee’s Knees, 7:30 Charlie B’s, 1746 Mountain Rd., Stowe, 253-7355.

Charlie O’s, 70 Main St., Montpelier, 223-6820. p.m. NC. Chow! Bella, 28 N. Main St., St. Albans, 524-1405.

HALLMARK JAZZ QUARTET, Chow!

City Limits, 14 Greene St., Vergennes, 877-6919.

Bella, 7:30 p.m. NC. Club Metronome, 188 Main St., Burlington, 865-4563.

Contois Auditorium, Burlington City Hall, 865-7166.

SETH YACOVONE (blues, rock singerCuzzin’s Nightclub, 230 North Main St., Barre, 479-4344. songwriter), Matterhorn, 9 p.m. NC. Eclipse Theater, 48 Carroll Rd., Waitsfield, 496-8913.

VINNY’S GONE (blues-rock), Jasper’s Euro Gourmet Market & Café, 61 Main St., Burlington, 859-3467.

Finkerman’s Riverside Bar-B-Q, 188 River St., Montpelier, 229-2295.

Tavern, 9:30 p.m. NC. Finnigan’s Pub, 205 College St., Burlington, 864-8209.

Flynn Center/FlynnSpace, 153 Main St., Burlington, 863-5966.

Foggy’s Notion, One Lawson Lane, Burlington, 862-4544.

Franny O’s, 733 Queen City Pk. Rd., Burlington, 863-2909.

Geno’s Karaoke Club, 127 Porters Point Road, Colchester, 658-2160.

Giovanni’s Trattoria, 15 Bridge St., Plattsburgh, 518-561-5856.

Global Markets Café, 325 North Winooski Ave., Burlington, 863-3210.

Good Times Café, Rt. 116, Hinesburg, 482-4444.

Great Falls Club, Frog Hollow Alley, Middlebury, 388-0239.

ALEXANDRIA HALL (singer-songwriter), Gusto’s, 28 Prospect St., Barre, 476-7919.

Halvorson’s Upstreet Café, 16 Church St., Burlington, 658-0278.

Radio Bean, 8 p.m. NC, followed by Hardwick Town House, 127 Church St., Hardwick, 456-8966.

DARK CLOUD (hip-hop), 8 p.m. NC, Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 1068 Williston Rd., S. Burlington, 863-6361. followed by THE 78S (indie cabaret), Higher Ground, 1214 Williston Rd., S. Burlington, 654-8888.

Inn at Baldwin Creek, 1868 N. Route 116, Bristol, 424-2432.

9 p.m. NC, followed by SPECIAL Jasper’s Tavern, 19 North Ave., Newport, 334-2224.

GUEST (rock), 10 p.m. NC. JP’s Pub, 139 Main St., Burlington, 658-6389.

MADERA (nuevo Flamenco), Parima, Jeff’s Maine Seafood, 65 N. Main St., St. Albans, 524-6135.

Kacey’s, 31 Federal St., St. Albans, 524-9864.

8 p.m. NC. La Brioche Bakery, 89 East Main St. Montpelier, 229-0443.

DJs PRECIOUS, JOE HENNESSEY, WILL Lakeview Inn & Restaurant, 295 Breezy Ave., Greensboro, 533-2291.

TAYLOR (dance, house), 135 Pearl, Langdon St. Café, 4 Langdon St., Montpelier, 223-8667.

Leunig’s, 115 Church St., Burlington, 863-3759.

10 p.m. $5.

Lincoln Inn Tavern, 4 Park St., Essex Jct., 878-3309.

GORDON STONE (funkgrass), Rí Rá Irish Lion’s Den Pub, Mountain Road, Jeffersonville, 644-5567.

Pub, 10 p.m. NC. Localfolk Smokehouse, Jct. Rt. 100 & 17, Waitsfield, 496-5623.

Mad River Unplugged at Valley Players Theater, Rt. 100, Waitsfield, DJ A-DOG (hip-hop), Red Square, 5 p.m.

496-8910.

NC, followed by CHRONIC FUNK, Main St. Grill, 118 Main St., Montpelier, 223-3188.

8 p.m. $3, followed by DJ A-DOG Manhattan Pizza & Pub, 167 Main St., Burlington, 658-6776.

Matterhorn, 4969 Mountain Rd., Stowe, 253-8198. (hip-hop), midnight, $3.

McKee’s Pub, 19 East Allen St., Winooski, 655-0048.

KIP MEAKER (blues), 1/2 Lounge, Melting Pot Café, Rt 2, East Montpelier, 223-1303.

7 p.m. NC. Memorial Auditorium, 250 Main St, Burlington, 864-6044.

2x1-tantra091405 9/9/05 3:04 PMMes Page 1 Mountain Rd., Stowe, 253-8512.

Amis, 311 SAT.17 >> 57A

STONE COLD ROOSTERS (rock ’n’ roll), Langdon St. Café, 9 p.m. Donations.

CHIP WILSON (New Orleans blues, jazz singer-songwriter), Black Door Bar & Bistro, 9:30 p.m. $5.

MICKEY WESTERN (acid country, rock), Positive Pie II, 10 p.m. $3.

CHRIS SMITHER, LOUISE TAYLOR (singer-songwriter), Middle Earth, 8:30 p.m. $18.

:: northern

SAT.17

:: burlington area

Middle Earth Music Hall, Bradford, 222-4748.

Miguel’s Stoweaway, 68 Church St., Burlington, 651-5298.

The Monkey House, 30 Main St., Winooski, 655-4563.

Monopole, 7 Protection Ave., Plattsburgh, N.Y., 518-563-2222.

Muddy Waters, 184 Main St., Burlington, 658-0466.

Music Box, 147 Creek Rd., Craftsbury, 586-7533.

Music Club, 110 Business Center Rd., Williamstown, 443-6106.

Naked Turtle, 1 Dock St., Plattsburgh, N.Y., 518-566-6200 Nectar’s, 188 Main St., Burlington, 658-4771.

1/2, 136 1/2 Church St., Burlington, 865-0012.

135 Pearl St., Burlington, 863-2343.

Old Lantern, Greenbush Rd., Charlotte, 425-2120.

Olde Yankee Restaurant, Rt. 15, Jericho, 899-1116.

Opus Grill, 156 St. Paul St., Burlington, 651-0052.

Orion Pub & Grill, Route 108, Jeffersonville, 644-8884.

Overtime Saloon, 38 S. Main St., St. Albans, 524-0357.

Paramount Theater, 30 Center St., Rutland, 775-0570.

Parima, 185 Pearl St., Burlington, 864-7917.

Park Place Tavern, 38 Park St., Essex Jct., 878-3015.

Peabody’s Pub, Plattsburgh, 518-561-0158.

Pickle Barrel Nightclub, Killington Rd., Killington, 422-3035.

Phoenix Bar, Sugarbush Village, Warren, 583-2003.

Pitcher Inn, 275 Main Street, Warren, 496-6350.

Positive Pie, 69 Main St., Plainfield, 454-0133.

Positive Pie II, 20 State St., Montpelier, 229-0453.

Purple Moon Pub, Rt. 100, Waitsfield, 496-3422.

Radio Bean, 8 N. Winooski Ave., Burlington, 660-9346.

Rasputin’s, 163 Church St., Burlington, 864-9324.

Red Mill Restaurant, Basin Harbor, Vergennes, 475-2311.

Red Square, 136 Church St., Burlington, 859-8909.

Rhapsody Café, 28 Main St., Montpelier, 229-6112.

Rhythm & Brews Coffeehouse, UVM, Burlington, 656-4211.

Riley Rink, Rt. 7A North, Manchester, 362-0150.

Ripton Community Coffee House, Rt. 125, 388-9782.

Rí Rá Irish Pub, 123 Church St., Burlington, 860-9401.

River Run Restaurant, 65 Main St., Plainfield, 454-1246.

Riverwalk Records & The Howard Bean Café, 30 State St., Montpelier, 223-3334.

Roque’s Restaurante Mexicano & Cantina, 3 Main St., Burlington, 657-3377.

Rosita’s Mexican Restaurant, 7 Fayette Drive, S. Burlington, 862-8809.

Rozzi’s Lakeshore Tavern, 1072 West Lakeshore Dr., Colchester, 863-2342.

Ruben James, 159 Main St., Burlington, 864-0744.

Rusty Nail, Mountain Rd., Stowe, 253-6245.

Sami’s Harmony Pub, 216 Rt. 7, Milton, 893-7267.

Season’s Bistro at the Wyndham Hotel, 60 Battery Street, Burlington, 859-5013.

Second Floor, 165 Church St., Burlington, 660-2088.

Smuggler’s Notch Inn, 55 Church St., Rt. 108, Jeffersonville, 644-6607.

St. John’s Club, 9 Central Ave., Burlington, 864-9778.

Starry Night Café, 5371 Rt. 7, Ferrisburgh, 877-6316.

Stowehof Inn, Edson Hill Rd., Stowe, 253-9722.

Sweetwaters, 118 Church St., Burlington, 864-9800.

Tabu Café & Nightclub, 14 Margaret St., Plattsburgh, 518-566-0666.

T. Bones Restaurant & Bar, 38 Lower Mountain View Drive, Colchester, 654-8008.

38 Main Street Pub, 38 Main St., Winooski, 655-0072.

Three Mountain Lodge, Jeffersonville, 644-5736.

Toscano Café & Bistro, 27 Bridge St., Richmond, 434-3148.

Trackside Tavern, 18 Malletts Bay Ave., Winooski, 655-9542.

Three Mountain Lodge Restaurant, Smugglers’ Notch Road, Rt. 108, Jeffersonville, 644-5736.

Two Brothers Tavern, 86 Main St., Middlebury, 388-0002.

242 Main, Burlington, 862-2244.

Upper Deck Pub at the Windjammer, 1076 Williston Rd., S. Burlington, 862-6585.

Valley Players Theater, Rt. 100, Waitsfield, 496-8910.

Vermont Pub & Brewery, 144 College St., Burlington, 865-0500.

Village Tavern at Smugglers’ Notch Inn, 55 Church St., Jeffersonville, 644-6607.

Waterbury Wings, 1 South Main St., Waterbury, 244-7827.

Waterfront Theatre, 60 Lake St., Burlington, 862-7469.

Wine Bar at Wine Works, 133 St. Paul St., Burlington, 951-9463.

Zoe’s Tack Room & Café, 3825 Rt. 7, Charlotte, 425-5867.

1x6-nectars030205

GREAT THAI FOOD 12/5/05& Martini 11:34 AM& Specialty Page 1

10:571x6-PaperPeddler121405 AM Page 1

CLOSED THURSDAY December 15

CHARLES DEAD OR ALIVE PRESENTS

THE NUTCRACKER W. MISSY BLY FOLKLORE OPENS FRIDAY December 16

CHROME COWBOYS HOLIDAY HO DOWN

MON & TUE December 19-20

CLOSED WEDNESDAY December 21

HIRST & FRIENDS

THURSDAY December 22

THE JAZZ GUYS JAMES KOCHALKA MISSY BLY SUNDAY December 25

XMAS SUNDAY NIGHT MASS WITH BLESSED BREAKS FT. JEREMY RUSSELL, DJ ENDO PHATRIX, CHRIS PATTON WEDNESDAY December 28

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54A

|

december 14-21, 2005

|

SEVEN DAYS

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1. Grace Potter & the Nocturnals — Nothing But the Water 2. Matisyahu — Live at Stubb’s 3. Bright Eyes — Motion Sickness 4. Wilco — Kicking Television: Live in Chicago 5. Susan Tedeschi — Hope & Desire 6. Talib Kweli — Right About Now 7. Clap Your Hands, Say Yeah — Clap Your Hands, Say Yeah 8. Johnny Cash — I Walk the Line 9. Trey Anastasio — Shine 10. Ray LaMontagne — Live From Bonnaroo

1. Grace Potter & the Nocturnals — Nothing But the Water 2. Neil Young — Prairie Wind 3. Diana Krall — Christmas Songs 4. Susan Tedeschi — Hope & Desire 5. Kristina Stykos — In the Earth’s Fading Light 6. Patti Casey — The Edge of Grace 7. Capital City Concerts — The Music of J.S. Bach 8. Wilco — Kicking Television: Live in Chicago 9. Susannah Clifford-Blachly — Middle of the Night 10. Enya — Amarantine

1. Korn — See You on the Other Side 2. Susan Tedeschi — Hope & Desire 3. Scott Stapp — The Great Divide 4. Johnny Cash — The Legend of Johnny Cash 5. Guns N’ Roses — Greatest Hits 6. Green Day — American Idiot 7. System of a Down — Hypnotize 8. John Mayer Trio — Try! 9. Shakira — Oral Fixation Vol. II 10. Diana Krall — Christmas Songs

1. Grace Potter & the Nocturnals — Nothing But the Water 2. Grace Potter — Original Soul 3. George Winston — December 4. Various Artists — Putumayo Presents: African Playground 5. Bonnie Raitt — Souls Alike 6. Diana Krall — Christmas Songs 7. Il Divo — Christmas Collection 8. Johnny Cash — I Walk the Line 9. Original Soundtrack — Good Night, & Good Luck 10. Von Trapp Family — Christmas With the Trapp Family Singers

1. Korn — See You on the Other Side 2. Eminem — Curtain Call 3. Neil Diamond — Twelve Songs 4. Dierks Bentley — Modern Day Drifter 5. Matisyahu — Live at Stubb’s 6. Johnny Cash — The Legend 7. 50 Cent — Get Rich or Die Tryin’ Soundtrack 8. Dave Matthews Band — Weekend on the Rocks 9. Tragically Hip — Hipeponymous (Box) 10. Santana — All That I Am

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4:15 PM

Page 1

PRESENT:

top 99 of

the

2005

the best buzz cuts of the year, according to you!

CAST YOUR VOTE FOR THE TOP 99 SONGS OF 2005: 1.

2.

3.

MAIL TO: PO BOX 999, BURLINGTON, VT 05402

LISTEN ON NEW YEAR’S EVE AT 4:00PM AS WE COUNT DOWN THE TOP 99 OF 2005!

SEVEN DAYS

|

december 14-21, 2005| music 55A

reviewthis TIRED OF TRYING, ONE GOOD DAY (Self-released, CD) Burlington’s Tired of Trying are among the unsung heroes in the local hardcore punk scene.

Comprising the singly named Dave, Eric and Mike, the band trades in working-class anthems loaded with ballsy vitriol. Their latest, One Good Day, boasts seven in-your-face musical bruisers that come on like an ornery drunk at a dive bar.

Tired of Trying’s sound is of the vintage hardcore variety. While other bands explore tricky time signatures and melodic vocals, TOT keeps it real with enormo riffs and thunderous rhythms. It’s the audio equivalent of red meat, served with a pint of Guinness.

Opener “Red Cent” roars out of the speakers with double-time percussion blasts and guitars the size of China’s Great Wall. The tune is a raging condemnation of charity, from the standpoint of a person without a penny to spare. Bassist/vocalist Dave spits lines such as “Don’t ask me what I got, ’cause I ain’t got a fucking red cent,” over the tune’s metallic thunder. His torn-throat staccato is somewhat reminiscent of Boston howlers such as the Mighty Mighty Bosstone’s Dickey Barrett and Dropkick Murphys’ Matt Kelly.

“As the Day Is Long” utilizes a stun-gun guitar figure to muscle its way into your mind. As drummer Mike relentlessly pounds the skins, guitarist Eric fires off speedy riffs and explosive breakdowns. All the tricks in the hardcore handbook are employed, from stinging pick slides to double-bass drum rolls. It’s a solid, if traditional, example of impassioned punk rock.

The chorus of “Sorry” is surprisingly melodic, with Dave’s gruff bark taking on a strained, singsong quality. While the vocal is a little rough around the edges, at least it’s not the auto-tuned embarrassment found on Good Charlotte records.

“Not My Problem” is my favorite cut. “Your parents don’t want you to go to the show, but that’s not my problem / You’re looking for work but the factory’s closed / Everybody seems to think we give a damn,” Dave growls intimidatingly over an Aerosmith-gone-Cro-magnon riff. The tune also features a particularly hot guitar solo. It’s the only one on the record.

I’m glad to know that bands like this still exist. In their brutal simplicity, Tired of Trying are millions of miles from skinny-tie ’n’ mascara-wearing suburbanites masquerading as punk rockers. Hear for yourself on Friday, Dec. 16, at Burlington’s 242 Main.

CASEY REA

modq-MagicHat121405

12/12/05

10:18 AM

Page 1

THE SAMPLES, REHEARSING FOR LIFE (Apache, CD) Vermont-based band The Samples rode in on the great wave of early ’90s jam acts. For those who missed the action, here’s a recap: Phish were the spiritual heirs to the Dead, Blues Traveler the working-class road warriors, Spin Doctors the radio sensations, and The Samples, campus darlings. I remember how stoked I was to see them for only five bucks back in my school daze. Well, times change. Considering their latest disc, Rehearsing for Life, I would no longer be so quick to part with my spare change.

Of course, these are not The Samples circa 1992. The lineup has changed several times over the years, with the lead singer-songwriter Sean Kelly the only constant. This is his band and has always been. So, while he gets credit for how good the Samples were, he also shoulders the blame for their failings. This record falls in the latter category.

The musicianship is solid, if uninspiring, throughout. Multi-instrumentalist Dan Blondin’s harmonica, banjo and mandolin work helps add color to what would otherwise be a rather dull affair. The album’s biggest flaws are in the songwriting department, however, and Kelly is credited as the composer of both music and lyrics.

Much of the Samples’ early output contained plenty of fun and bounce. Sadly, that carefree sound has gone missing. In place of spirited songwriting, Kelly has turned to clichés. Many of the songs are loaded with nostalgic platitudes and sentimental musings. The pining even extends to the song titles such as “Young and Free” and “Too Young to Die.” The latter features the telling line, “Asked where the child within had gone,” while “Superstar” speaks of “calendars and faded magazines.” “Nevers” gives a hint of where Kelly’s head is now: “I never stayed in one place too long, I never thought I would sing this song,” he intones.

The lowest point of the album is the tune “Dad,” which bemoans a nearly nonexistent father-son relationship. While there’s nothing wrong with this kind of soul-searching, the subject has been handled far more movingly by other artists. “Cat’s in the Cradle” it ain’t.

There are some OK moments, however. “Heaven” invokes XTC’s “Dear God” in words, sound and spirit, modq-Sugarbush121405 12/12/05 11:25 AM Page 1 and “My Guitar” is cheesy fun. “We’re just playing our songs, were not doing anything wrong,” sings Kelly. Apparently, that’s all we can ask for.

JAKE RUTTER

56A

|

december 14-21, 2005

|

SEVEN DAYS

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10/27/05

11:08 AM

Page 1

by their Bellatrix bandmates. Hereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hoping 2006 will see an official full-length from the trio. In the meantime, impatient fans can catch â&#x20AC;&#x2122;em at Montpelierâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Langdon St. CafĂŠ this Thursday.

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SEVEN DAYS

SAT.17 << 53A SAVOY BROWN, POJAZZ (blues-rock, jazz), Nectarâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, 6:30 p.m. $15/18, followed by GREG IZOR BLUES BAND, 10:30 p.m. $3.

RETRONOME (â&#x20AC;&#x2122;70s, â&#x20AC;&#x2122;80s DJ), Club Metronome, 10 p.m. $5.

HOW WE ARE, EARTHQUAKE, JUMP THE GUN (punk, hardcore), 242 Main, 7 p.m. $6. AA. MASSIVE (DJs), Rasputinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, 10 p.m. $3.

8084 (classic rock; CD release party), Second Floor, 9 p.m. $5/10. 18+, followed by RETRO ROCK DJ, midnight. $5. 21+.

DJ RUGGER (hip-hop, r&b), Ruben James, 10 p.m. NC. DAVE HARRISONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S STARSTRUCK KARAOKE, JPâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pub, 10 p.m. NC. VIDEO DANCE PARTY WITH VJ HOT ROD, Foggyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Notion, 9 p.m. NC. JIM BRANCA BAND (blues), Lincoln Inn Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE WITH TOWNIE, Banana Winds CafĂŠ, 9 p.m. NC. DARK HORSE (rock), Backstage Pub, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, Genoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Karaoke Club, from 3 p.m. NC. KARAOKE WITH REX, Franny Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, 9 p.m. NC.

:: champlain valley SUPERSOUNDS DJ, Red Mill Restaurant, 10:15 p.m. NC. RINGBONE (worldbeat, rock, reggae), Localfolk Smokehouse, 10 p.m. $5.

PAUL ASBELL (jazz, Americana), Great Falls Club, 8:30 p.m. $10.

TOP HAT ENTERTAINMENT DANCE PARTY (DJ), City Limits, 9 p.m. NC. THE HUBCATS (acoustic duo), Olde Yankee Restaurant, 6:30 p.m. NC.

:: central VORCZA (progressive jazz, groove), Charlie Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, 9:30 p.m. NC. DAVID MURPHEY (American roots), La Brioche Bakery, 1 p.m. NC. TOAST & JAM KIDSâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; PUPPET SLAM, Langdon St. CafĂŠ, 11 a.m. Donations, followed by EAMES BROTHERS (original blues), 9:30 p.m. NC.

HOT HOUSE JAZZ, Black Door Bar & Bistro, 9:30 p.m. $5.

LIVE LOCAL DJ (hip-hop, reggae), Positive Pie II, 9:30 p.m. NC. DIANE ZIEGLER (contemporary folk singer-songwriter; Christmas concert), Valley Players Theater, 8 p.m. $15/17.

OSHE (jam, fusion), Middle Earth, 8:30 p.m. $8.

KARAOKE, Genoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Karaoke Club, from 6 p.m. NC. KARAOKE WITH PETER BOARDMAN, Backstage Pub, 9 p.m. NC.

:: champlain valley FRED BARNES JAZZ BRUNCH (piano), Two Brothers Tavern, 10:30 a.m. NC.

:: central

:: northern PAUL DOUSE (rock singer-songwriter), Overtime Saloon, 7:30 p.m. NC. ALL NIGHT DANCE PARTY WITH DJ TOXIC (hip-hop, top 40, house, reggae), Tabu CafĂŠ & Nightclub, 5 p.m. â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 4 a.m. NC. 18+.

LASLO CAMEO (electric roots), Beeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Knees, 7:30 p.m.

PULSE (r&b), Rusty Nail, 10 p.m. $5.

2U (U2 tribute), Matterhorn, 9:30 p.m.

NC.

CODY MICHAELS (solo piano), Langdon St. CafĂŠ, noon. Donations, followed

by PARKER SHPER TRIO (jazz), 8 p.m. Donations.

TABLE 45 (funk), Purple Moon Pub, 8:30 p.m. $3.

:: northern SHAY ROSEHIP (banjo & guitar), Beeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Knees, noon. NC, followed by BLUE FOX (blues), 7:30 p.m. NC.

SUN.18 MON.19 :: burlington area

:: burlington area LILY HOLBROOK (singer-songwriter), Radio Bean, 9 p.m. NC, followed by SUPERBIRDMAN CHRISTMAS SPECIAL (reggae, eclectic), 9 p.m. NC. DJ PRECIOUS (dance, house), 135 Pearl, 10 p.m. NC. BROOKSIEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S 30TH BIRTHDAY PARTY WITH DJ A-DOG, 1/2 Lounge, 8:30 p.m. NC. OPEN BAND NIGHT, 9:30 p.m. NC. 18+.

SUNDAY NIGHT MASS WITH RJ, BEN BARLOW (house, breakbeat DJs), Club Metronome, 10 p.m. NC. DJS BIG DOG & DEMUS (reggae, dancehall), Ruben James, 10 p.m. NC. WIZN PRESENTS: KILLERS OF COMEDY WITH REV. BOB LEVY, JIM FLORENTINE, RICHARD CHRISTY, SAL THE STOCKBROKER, CRAIG GASS, GARY THE RETARD, Higher Ground Ballroom, 7:30/10 p.m. $20/23. 18+.

JOHN TOWER GROUP, LOWELL THOMPSON (Americana, rock, singersongwriter), Higher Ground Showcase Lounge, 8 p.m. $8/10. AA.

OPEN MIKE, Radio Bean, 8 p.m. NC. DAVE GRIPPO FUNK BAND, Red Square, 10 p.m. NC. JAH RED PRESENTS: LATINO HEAT (salsa, merengue, bachata DJ), 1/2 Lounge, 10 p.m. NC. MOVIE NIGHT: HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS, ELF, Nectarâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, 7 p.m. NC. AA, followed by WRUV DJS MONACO & BLIND (eclectic), 9:30 p.m. NC.

:: burlington area

:: burlington area

GUA GUA (psychotropical), Radio Bean, 6 p.m. NC, followed by AQUADORA (indie-rock), 9 p.m. NC, followed by HONKY-TONK SESSIONS, 10 p.m.

NC. OPEN TURNTABLES, 135 Pearl, 9 p.m.

NC. JULIET MCVICKER (jazz vocals), Leunigâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, 7 p.m. NC. BILL MULLINS & FRIENDS (rock), 1/2 Lounge, 9 p.m. NC. BASHMENT WITH DJS DEMUS & SUPER K (reggae, dancehall), Red Square, 9 p.m. NC. MARKO THE MAGICIAN, Rositaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, 5:30 p.m. NC. BLUESDAY WITH THE NERBAK BROTHERS, Nectarâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, 9 p.m. NC. FOLK MUSIC WITH RYAN FARBER & GUESTS, Euro Gourmet, 7 p.m. NC. BLUEGRASS NIGHT WITH BLUE NORTHER, Lincoln Inn, 8 p.m. NC. TOUCHPANTS WITH JON FISHMAN, DEEP SODA, BENNY B & DIAMOND, DJK (rock, comedy, eclectic), Higher Ground Showcase Lounge, 8 p.m. $5.

18+.

IRISH SESSIONS, Radio Bean, 9 p.m.

NC. PINE STREET JAZZ WITH JODY ALBRIGHT, Parima, 7 p.m. NC. TOP HAT KARAOKE, 135 Pearl, 9 p.m.

NC. PAUL ASBELL & CLYDE STATS (jazz), Leunigâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, 7 p.m. NC. DIRTY BLONDES: PRELUDE TO THE CHRISTMAS OPERA (punk rock), Red Square, 8 p.m. NC, followed by MEMBERS ONLY WITH FATTIE B. (â&#x20AC;&#x2122;80s DJ), 11 p.m. NC. NICHOLAS CASSARINO TRIO (jazz fusion), 1/2 Lounge, 9:30 p.m. NC. JAPHY RYDER, DJ ZJ (jazz, funk, hiphop, downtempo), Nectarâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, 9:30 p.m.

NC. OPEN MIKE WITH ANDY LUGO & DJ TRANSPLANTE, Manhattan Pizza & Pub, 10 p.m. NC. DAVE HARRISONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S STARSTRUCK KARAOKE, JPâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pub, 10 p.m. NC. KARAOKE CONTEST, Foggyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Notion, 9 p.m. NC. POETRY READING & OPEN MIKE, Euro Gourmet, 6 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Genoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Karaoke Club, from 8 p.m. NC.

:: champlain valley LADIESâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; NIGHT, City Limits, 9 p.m. NC.

:: champlain valley

:: central

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LITTLE WOODEN MEN & WOMEN (eclectic rock), Langdon St. CafĂŠ, 9:30 p.m. Donations.

:: central

:: northern CHRIS LYON (solo guitar), Beeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Knees, 7:30 p.m. NC.

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december 14-21, 2005| music 57A

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december 14-21, 2005

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SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005

www.sevendaysvt.com/film

film review

|

film 59A

< film> <filmclips>

BY RICK KISONAK

PREVIEWS FUN WITH DICK AND JANE: Jim Carrey and Tea Leoni are paired in this update of the 1977 George Segal-Jane Fonda comedy about a suburban couple who turn to crime in order to maintain their upscale lifestyle.

Directed by Dean (Home Fries) Parisot.

(100 min, PG-13) KING KONG: Naomi Watts, Adrien Brody and Jack Black head the cast in Peter Jackson’s big-budget update of the 1933 classic. (PG-13) THE FAMILY STONE: Dermot Mulroney and Sarah Jessica Parker are among the ensemble cast in Thomas Bezucha’s Meet the Parents-reminiscent comedy about the madcap antics that ensue when a young man introduces his girlfriend to his family. With Diane Keaton, Craig T. Nelson and Luke Wilson. (102 min, PG-13) WALLACE & GROMIT FESTIVAL: The city of Montpelier presents a free screening of three W & G classics: A Grand Day Out, The Wrong Trousers and A Close Shave.

SHORTS

The Squid and the Whale HHHH

T SQUID PRO QUO Daniels and Linney play exes who trade unkindnesses at the expense of their kids.

his may be the scariest movie of 2005. Nothing in Saw II, The Fog, The Devil’s Rejects, Dark Water, The Exorcism of Emily Rose or Land of the Dead compares to the horror that is the Berkman household. Bernard (Jeff Daniels) teaches college literature. He is an opinionated blowhard who once published a few novels that were promptly forgotten. Joan (Laura Linney) also has a PhD in literature. She has only recently begun to write, but her efforts are meeting with enviable success. The disparity in their career trajectories would certainly pose a threat to their marriage had it not already self-destructed.

Failed careers and relationships are tough, but when children are forced to watch the only family they’ve known go down in flames, the results can be tragic. They are heartbreakingly so in writer-director Noah Baumbach’s semiautobiographical film, The Squid and the Whale.

Set in Brooklyn in the late ’80s, this is the story of a highly educated husband and wife who don’t know enough not to use their two sons as pawns in the bitter game they play with one another. Daniels has taken their older child prisoner and turned him into an angry mirror image of himself. Jesse (The Village) Eisenberg gives an unforgettable performance in the role. I can’t remember the last time I saw a teenager portrayed with such a credible, affecting combination of insecurity, resentment and confusion.

Accustomed to parroting his father’s views, he recommends that a girlfriend read The Metamorphosis because “it’s a masterpiece.” When she does and attempts to discuss the book with him, it becomes clear he’s never actually opened it. At a loss for words, the boy characterizes its ending as “Kafkaesque.” The ensuing awkwardness is sublime.

Meanwhile, the couple’s younger son deals with the

changes taking place in his life in his own way — developing a habit of masturbating in public places, pushing cashews up his nose, and cultivating a taste for cold beer in cans. It’s an eye-popping piece of work courtesy of 12year-old Owen Kline, son of actors Kevin Kline and Phoebe Cates. To the credit of everyone in the famous family, it’s easily the most arresting bit of screen work any of its accomplished members have produced this century.

The lad aligns himself with his mother, understandably, given his tender age, trauma and the fact that his old man goes all Great Santini on him when he ultimately poses a threat at ping-pong. This divides the disintegrating Berkman family down the middle. For a time, anyway.

The moral of Baumbach’s story — to the extent there is one — is that every story has two sides. Each boy thinks he knows which parent is the monster. Until he learns the truth about the other.

This is searing, perceptive, powerful stuff, certain to rank high on the best-of lists of many reviewers this awards season. Stephen King calls it the finest movie of 2005, and he’s a guy who knows a little something about horror.

And, as long as I’m predicting the future, permit me to foresee Daniels buried in best-actor nominations. He’s always been a likable, reliable, highly watchable screen performer, but pulls greatness out of someplace deep inside him here.

The race, in fact, is shaping up to pivot on portrayals of two writers, one a disappointment and one a superstar. I’m not sure anyone’s going to eclipse the stunning job Philip Seymour Hoffman does in Capote, but if anyone does, my bet is it’ll be Daniels.

Leave the kids at home and see The Squid and the Whale. Family films don’t get more grown-up than this. m

AEON FLUXHHH Charlize Theron stars in Karyn (Girlfight) Kusama’s sci-fi adventure about a futuristic female agent sent to assassinate a government leader. Based on the popular animated MTV series from the 1990s.

With Marton Csokas, Jonny Lee Miller and Amelia Warner. (93 min, PG-13) CAPOTEHHHH1/2 Philip Seymour Hoffman disappears into the role of writer-socialite Truman Capote in this biopic, which focuses on the years when the author wrote In Cold Blood.

Catherine Keener costars. Bennett Miller directs. (98 min, R) CHICKEN LITTLE HH1/2 Zach Braff, Joan Cusack and Don Knotts are among the voice cast in Disney’s computer-animated comedy in which the sky really is threatening not to stay where it belongs. (81 min, G) FIRST DESCENTHHH Kemp Curly and Kevin Harrison direct this documentary chronicling the rise of snowboarding through the eyes of early pioneers and current superstars. (PG-13) GOOD NIGHT, AND GOOD LUCKHHHH David Strathairn stars in George Clooney’s account of the mid-century clash between CBS newsman Edward R. Murrow and professional witchhunter Joseph McCarthy. With Robert Downey, Jr. (90 min, PG) HARRY POTTER AND THE GOBLET OF FIRE HHHH The latest installment revolves around a wizards’ tournament featuring a number of life-threatening competitions. Featuring Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint and Emma Watson. (150 min, PG-13)

SHORTS >> 61A

RATINGS

H = refund, please HH = could’ve been worse, but not a lot HHH = has its moments; so-so HHHH = smarter than the average bear HHHHH = as good as it gets Ratings assigned to movies not reviewed by Rick Kisonak are courtesy of Metacritic.com, which averages scores given by the country’s most widely read reviewers (Rick included).

60A

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december 14-21, 2005

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SEVEN DAYS

SYRIANA

flick chick

BY SUSAN GREEN

SHORT TAKES ON THE REEL WORLD

Mideast Mystery don’t want to hear about the missing weapon of mass destruction. They’re more concerned with trying to undermine a progressive prince, Nasir (Alexander Siddig), who’s vowing to limit U.S. influence and stop oppressing women in an unspecified emirate that sounds suspiciously like Saudi Arabia.

“Suddenly, I’m a godless communist,” Nasir says at one point, summing up his vilification by rightwingers in Washington, D.C. He gives China the natural-gas drilling rights that were previously held by Connex Oil, a Houston corporation run by the slimy Jimmy Pope (Chris Cooper). To keep the profits flowing, Pope is determined to merge with a smaller Texas company that has just signed an exploration deal with Kazakhstan. But the Justice Department wants to scrutinize the impending alliance of these two Lone Star State businesses.

Enter Jeffrey Wright as Bennett Holiday, an attorney for a prestigious law firm helping Connex navigate the shoals of public oversight. The sinister senior partner (Christopher Plummer) has many friends in high places.

In Switzerland, Bryan Woodman (Matt Damon) is an ambitious energy analyst with a lovely wife (Amanda Peet) and two sons. As the result of a personal tragedy, he becomes an advisor to Nasir — who needs all the advice he can get. His scheming

younger brother is chosen to succeed their ailing father, the emir. This means the country will remain under America’s thumb, and the ladies shouldn’t throw away their head-totoe shrouds just yet.

William Hurt has a cameo as a Deep Throat type who warns Barnes to “clear it with Hezbollah” before embarking on another assignment: to trail Nasir in Beirut. One of the film’s few laughs comes when the Yank — trying to seem less like a walking target — claims to be Canadian. He discovers at his own peril that Lebanon is still a hotbed of jihad.

Meanwhile, the ripple effect is profound: After the loss of drilling rights in the Persian Gulf, Connex lays off dozens of oil rig employees, including a Pakistani migrant worker (Mashard Munir) who loves Spider-Man and soccer. Unable to find another job, he winds up in a madrassa, a radical Islamic school where he learns to despise modernity.

All this exposition is really only the prelude to a tangled tale of calculation, manipulation, betrayal and mur-

der. In other words, just another day in the quest for oil billions. Michael Douglas’ memorable Wall Street pronouncement that “greed is good” pales in comparison with the heartfelt tribute to corruption expressed in Syriana by Tim Blake Nelson, portraying a politician.

In addition to the twisty screenplay, Robert Elswit’s cinematography, Tim Squyres’ editing and Alexandre Desplat’s score all contribute to the gnawing tension. Gaghan, who also wrote Traffic, never preaches.

Nonetheless, he creates a sense of dread about what any individual can possibly do to outwit omniscient forces. There’s even a fleeting TV image of John D. Rockefeller, a subtle history lesson for people who have forgotten this country’s fossil-fuel legacy.

Such pessimism is unusual in a mainstream Hollywood movie. It’s also rare to have so little heroism in a big-budget picture with an ensemble cast of immensely talented performers.

Redemption is elusive. Everyone’s complicit. Fill ’er up. m

“Flick Chick” is a weekly column that can also be read on www.sevendaysvt.com.

To reach Susan Green, email flickchick@sevendaysvt.com.

fickle fannie

BY DAVID DIEFENDORF

READ THIS FIRST:

This week, as always, the things Fannie likes (shown in CAPITAL letters) all follow a secret rule. Can you figure out what it is?

NOTE: Fickle Fannie likes words. But each week she likes something different about them — how they’re spelled, how they sound, how they look, what they mean, or what’s inside them.

Is the middle light in a TRAFFIC SIGNAL yellow, or amber?

So far APPLE hasn’t come up with a computer named Granny Smith.

You needed 3-D GLASSES for a recent episode of Medium.

The HOLLY Golightly in the movie was not like the one in the book.

The FLAG OF BANGLADESH is like Japan’s, with a difference.

Science hasn’t yet told us whether boiling LOBSTERS feel pain.

BLEEDING TREEFROGS get that way from being too amorous.

Since it glows in the dark, the PRIMROSE is Las Vegas’s city flower.

A mix of JALAPENOS and wasabi makes up the Devil’s Mouthwash.

E me with your Qs or comments (dd44art@aol.com). Difficulty rating for this puzzle: 25 OUT OF 31. If you’re stuck, see the HINT on this page.

If you cave, see the ANSWER on page 63A. So much for Fickle Fannie’s tastes this week. Next week she’ll have a whole new set of likes and dislikes.

FICKLE FANNIE HINT: Think mistletoe.

H

ow did our oil get under their sand?

That mordant joke, which circulated when Bush was preparing to invade the hornets’ nest called Iraq, should be the tagline for Syriana. The 126minute movie, now playing in Vermont, is a sort of dramatized diagram that shows how energy companies conspire with the American government to control the world’s dwindling petroleum supplies. Writerdirector Stephen Gaghan researched the script by traveling around the globe with Robert Baer, a former CIA agent whose actual covert experiences inspired this work of fiction.

Reality is no doubt far worse than the thoroughly chilling details on screen, however. The maddeningly complex film suggests that the proverbial “politics of oil” now shapes all human destiny. Its title refers to a nonexistent place conjured by conservative think tanks planning to reshape the Middle East. Oh, well. As long as I can count on regular unleaded for my Toyota Corolla.

Sporting a salt-and-pepper beard, George Clooney plays Bob Barnes, a seasoned agency operative based on Baer. The character has been working in the region long enough to speak fluent Arabic and Farsi. He’s also got a bit of blood on his hands.

Just as Barnes is car-bombing two militants during an undercover sting in Tehran, a high-tech missile disappears. But his bosses back at Langley

SEVEN DAYS

< filmclips> SHORTS << 59A JUST FRIENDSHH1/2 Roger (Cruel Intentions) Kumble directs this romantic comedy about a high school nerdturned-trendy L.A. music-industry exec who gets stranded in his hometown and settles some old scores. With Ryan Reynolds, Amy Smart and Chris Klein.

(88 min, PG-13) PRIDE AND PREJUDICEHHHH Keira Knightley, Brenda Blethyn and Donald Sutherland are among the cast in this latest adaptation of the classic Jane Austen novel. Joe Wright directs. (127 min, PG) RENTHH1/2 Based on Puccini’s timeless opera La Boheme, Jonathan Larson’s musical follows a group of young New Yorkers struggling to survive in the East Village. Starring Rosario Dawson, Taye Diggs and Jesse L. Martin.

Directed by Chris Columbus. (135 min, PG-13) SHOPGIRLHHH Anand Tucker brings Steve Martin’s bestselling novella to the screen. Martin plays a successful older gent who falls for the young woman behind the counter at an L.A. boutique. With Claire Danes, Jason Schwartzman and Rebecca Pidgeon.

(104 min, R) SYRIANAHHHH Traffic writer Stephen Gaghan steps behind the camera to bring us this geopolitical thriller that grapples with such ripped-from-theheadlines issues as terrorism, government abuse of power and the oil industry. Starring George Clooney, Amanda Peet and Matt Damon. (126 min, R) THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIAHHHH Andrew (Shrek) Adamson adapts C. S. Lewis’ classic Christian allegory, in which four children walk through a magical wardrobe to enter a kingdom where animals talk. Starring Tilda Swinton, James McAvoy and Jim Broadbent. (132 min, PG)

NEW ON DVD/VHS

THE CONSTANT GARDENERHHH1/2 Ralph Fiennes and Rachel Weisz are paired in Fernando (City of God) Meirelles’ adaptation of the John Le Carre thriller about a British diplomat investigating the mysterious death of his wife. With Danny Huston. (129 min, R) THE ICE HARVESTHHHH From director Harold (Groundhog Day) Ramis comes this dark holiday comedy about a Wichita attorney who embezzles $2 million and spends Christmas Eve trying to make it out of town alive. Starring John Cusack, Billy Bob Thornton and Connie Nielsen. (88 min, R) THE SQUID & THE WHALEHHHH Jeff Daniels and Laura Linney star in writerdirector Noah Baumbach’s tragicomic portrait of a New York family dealing with its disintegration in the mid1980s. Costarring Jesse Eisenberg, Anna Paquin and Owen Kline. (88 min, R) WALK THE LINEHHH James (Girl, Interrupted) Mangold brings the life story of the late Johnny Cash to the big screen with help from Joaquin Phoenix and Reese Witherspoon. (135 min, PG-13) YOURS, MINE & OURSHH Rene Russo and Dennis Quaid star in this remake of the 1968 Lucille Ball-Henry Fonda comedy about a widow and widower who find love and then find out what it’s like to raise the 18 children they bring to their relationship. With Linda Hunt. Directed by Raja Gosnell. (90 min, PG)

SPONSORED BY:

W W W. M E R R I L LT H E AT R E S . N E T

Once again we’ve selected scenes from four well-known movies and, through the magic of Film Quiz Technology, zapped the famous faces of their stars right out of the picture. Your job, as always, is to identify the four films, anyway, minus their stars and with only a single clue-ridden scene apiece to go on.

1

2

© 2005, Rick Kisonak

FACE LIFTS

LAST WEEK’S WINNER: CASSIE SMITH LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS: FAMOUS FACE A: JOHN LITHGOW FAMOUS FACE B: BRUCE WILLIS

3

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FILMQUIZ

film 61A

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C I N E M A S

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<filmclips>

R OX Y

december 14-21, 2005

ROLL BOUNCEHHH Nick Cannon and Lil $25 gift card for only $20 Bow Wow star in this ‘70s-set comedy about roller skaters who must try to fit * previously viewed in at a fashionable uptown facility when their local rink shuts down. With Chi McBride. Directed by Malcom D. mon-sat 10-10 • sun 12-10 Lee. (112 min, PG-13) THE 40-YEAR-OLD VIRGINHHH1/2 taft farms village center, williston Writer Judd (Anchorman) Apatow email: passportvideo@aol.com makes his directorial debut with this comedy about a middle-aged nerd whose friends conspire to end a lifelong stint of chastity. Starring Steve Carell, Catherine Keener and Paul Rudd.

(116 min, R) THE BAD NEWS BEARSHHH1/2 Billy Bob Thornton stars in this remake of the 1976 comedy about a crusty former minor-league player who winds up coaching a woefully inept Little Post comment cards for over 600 Vermont League team. Costarring Greg Kinnear restaurants and clubs and win prizes at and Marcia Gay Harden. Directed by Richard Linklater. (111 min, PG-13) THE BEAUTIFUL COUNTRYHHH Hans Petter Moland directs the saga of a young man’s arduous pilgrimage from Vietnam to Texas in search of the 2x2-7Ngeneric-bw.indd 1 12/1/05 American G.I. father he’s never met.

Starring Damien Nguyen, Nick Nolte and Tim Roth. (125 min, R) THE ISLANDHH Scarlett Johansson and Ewan McGregor are paired in Michael Bay’s futuristic action-thriller about a utopian community whose leaders harbor a nightmarish secret. With Djimon Hounsou. (134 min, PG-13) VALIANTHH1/2 Ewan McGregor, John Cleese and Tim Curry are among the voice cast for this computer-animated comedy about a plucky homing pigeon who volunteers for a daring mission during WWII. Gary Chapman directs.

(109 min, G)

Search the

T H E

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DEADLINE: Noon on Monday. PRIZES: $25 gift certificate to the sponsoring restaurant and a movie for two. In the event of a tie, winner chosen by lottery.

SEND ENTRIES TO: Movie Quiz, PO Box 68, Williston, VT 05495. OR EMAIL TO: ultrfnprd@aol.com.

Be sure to include your address. Please allow four to six weeks for delivery of prizes.

For more film fun don’t forget to watch “Art Patrol” every Thursday, Friday and Saturday on News Channel 5!

3:20:00 PM

62A | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

shot in the dark

The best of the VT blogosphere

BY MYESHA GOSSELIN

weeklypost COMPILED BY CATHY RESMER 2

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Found Drama

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from Âť http://blog.founddrama.net

dream.20051207: poker face I return home to find six 60+ year old women gathered around a table in my kitchen. Each of them has a laptop and is clicking furiously away at something that I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t quite see. When I enter the room they give me dirty looks, like Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve tread somewhere I shouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not wearing a watch but I guess maybe Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m home earlier than usual.

Regardless, they sort of bare their teeth at me, still clicking furiously away. I take a step closer and see that theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re all playing an online poker game. And winning. Winning a lot of money.

A. comes in to the room and pulls me aside. She explains that these women work for her now. Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re getting us rich. A. has figured out a system where she can essentially bypass the randomization routines that determine what cards come up in this online poker tournament. And now theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re cleaning up. Close to twenty-thousand just today.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s about then that I sense someone behind me. One of the women has tried to sneak up behind me with a knife. I manage to dodge the swipe and take off. She and the others chase me, trying to stab and slice me. A. yells at them that Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m OK â&#x20AC;&#x201D; but theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll have none of it. I guess I know too much now.

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SEVEN DAYS

<showtimes> BIJOU CINEPLEX 1-2-3-4 wednesday 14 — thursday 15 *King Kong 3:30, 6:50. The Chronicles of Narnia 3:40, 6:30.

Walk the Line 3:50, 6:40. Harry Potter & the Goblet of Fire 3:30, 7. friday 16 — thursday 22 *Cheaper By the Dozen (starts Wed) 6:25. *Fun With Dick & Jane (starts Wed) 6:45. *King Kong 11:30 & 2:50 (Sat & Sun), 6:15, 9:30 (Fri & Sat). The Chronicles of Narnia 12 & 3:25 (Sat & Sun), 6:35, 9 (Fri & Sat).

Harry Potter & the Goblet of Fire 11:45 & 3:15 (Sat & Sun), 6:25 (Fri-Tue), 9:20 (Fri & Sat). Walk the Line 12:10 & 3:35 (Sat & Sun), 6:45 (Fri-Tue), 9:25 (Fri & Sat).

Matinees Saturday and Sunday.

Times subject to change.

ESSEX CINEMA Essex Outlet Fair, Rt. 15 & 289, Essex Junction, 879-6543 wednesday 14 — thursday 15 *King Kong 12:45, 4:45, 8:30.

Aeon Flux 12:45, 3, 5:10, 7:20, 9:35. The Chronicles of Narnia 12:30, 1:15, 3:30, 4:30, 6:30, 7:45, 9:30. Harry Potter & the Goblet of Fire 12:30, 4, 7:30.

Syriana 1, 4, 6:45, 9:35. Walk the Line 12:30, 3:30, 6:30, 9:20.

Yours, Mine & Ours 12:50, 3, 5:10, 7:15, 9:20.

Yours, Mine and Ours 1:30 (Sat & Sun), 6:50, 8:40.

Matinees Saturday and Sunday.

Times subject to change. See www.merrilltheatres.net.

MAJESTIC 10 Maple Tree Place, Taft Corners, Williston, 878-2010. wednesday 14 — thursday 15 *King Kong 12, 2, 4, 6, 8, 9:45.

The Chronicles of Narnia 12:15, 1, 2:10, 3:20, 4:10, 5:10, 6:25, 7:20, 8:20, 9:25. Harry Potter & The Goblet of Fire 12, 3:10, 6:20, 9:30. Walk the Line 12:40, 3:40, 6:30, 9:20. Yours, Mine & Ours 12:10, 2:20, 4:35, 7, 9:10. Aeon Flux 12:50, 4:20, 7:10, 9:40. Just Friends 12:45, 9:45. Rent 3:30, 6:35. friday 16 — tuesday 20 *The Family Stone 1, 4:10, 7, 9:40. *King Kong 12, 2, 4, 6, 8, 9:45. The Chronicles of Narnia 12:30, 1:15, 2:10, 3:30, 4:20, 5:10, 6:30, 7:20, 8:20, 9:30.

Harry Potter & The Goblet of Fire 12, 3:10, 6:20, 9:25. Walk the Line 3:40, 6:40, 9:35. Yours, Mine & Ours 12:15, 2:20, 4:30, 6:50, 9:15. Aeon Flux 12:50. Just Friends 12:40, 9:20. Rent 3:20, 6:25. Chicken Little 12:10.

Times subject to change. See http://www.majestic10.com.

MARQUIS THEATER

friday 16 — tuesday 20 *The Family Stone 1:30, 4:10, 7, 9:25. Syriana 1:15, 3:45, 6:50, 9:35. Squid & The Whale 1:25, 3:15, 5, 7:20, 9:10. Pride & Prejudice 1:20, 4, 6:45, 9:20.

Walk the Line 3:50, 9:30.

Goodnight & Good Luck 1:50, 4:05, 7:15, 9:15. Capote 1:35, 6:55.

wednesday 14 — thursday 15 *King Kong 7. Harry Potter & The Goblet of Fire 6:30. friday 16 — thursday 22 *King Kong 1:30 (Sat & Sun), 6 & 9:25 (Fri & Sat), 7 (Sun-Thu).

Walk the Line 6:30 (Sun-Thu), 6:15 & 8:55 (Fri & Sat). Harry Potter & The Goblet of Fire 2 (Sat & Sun).

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Syriana 1, 3:45, 6:45, 9:30. Harry Potter & The Goblet of Fire 3:10, 6:30. Ice Harvest 3:50, 7. First Descent 12:40, 9:45. Aeon Flux 12:25, 2:40, 4:50, 7:05, 9:15.

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friday 16 — tuesday 20 *The Family Stone 12:05, 2:30, 2x3-blackhorse121405.indd 4:50, 7:10, 9:35. *King Kong 12:15, 2:15, 4, 6, 7:45, 9:40. The Chronicles of Narnia 12, 2, 3, 5, 6:20, 8, 9:20. Syriana 1, 3:45, 6:45, 9:30. Ice Harvest 3:50, 7.

First Descent 12:40, 9:45. Harry Potter & The Goblet of Fire 3:10, 6:30. Rent 12:45, 9:10. Walk the Line 12:35, 3:30, 6:30, 9:25.

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Holiday Spirit is a state of mind.

THE SAVOY THEATER Main Street, Montpelier, 229-0509. wednesday 14 — thursday 15 Shopgirl 6:30, 8:40. friday 16 — thursday 22 Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit 1:30, 6:30.

Wallace & Gromit Shorts 10:30 (Sun, free show).

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Mountain Rd., Stowe, 253-4678.

MERRILL’S ROXY CINEMA

wednesday 14 — thursday 15 Syriana 1:15, 3:45, 6:50, 9:35.

Squid & The Whale 1:25, 3:15, 5, 7:20, 9:10. Pride & Prejudice 1:20, 4, 6:45, 9:20. Walk the Line 1:10, 3:50, 6:40, 9:30.

Goodnight & Good Luck 1:50, 4:05, 7:15, 9:15. Capote 1:35, 3:55, 6:55, 9:25.

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Exquisite clothing, accessories & jewelry

Times subject to change.

STOWE CINEMA 3 PLEX College Street, Burlington, 8643456

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ETHAN ALLEN CINEMAS

friday 16 — tuesday 20 *King Kong 1 (Sat & Sun), 6, 9:20. Harry Potter & the Goblet of Fire 1:20 (Sat & Sun), 6:20, 9:10. The Chronicles of Narnia 1:10 (Sat & Sun), 6:30, 9:15.

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1636 Williston Road, S. Burlington • 862-5678

Times subject to change.

wednesday 14 — thursday 15 *King Kong 6, 9:20. The Chronicles of Narnia 6:30, 9:15.

Harry Potter & the Goblet of Fire 6:20, 9:10. Yours, Mine and Ours 6:50, 9:25.

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PALACE CINEMA 9

Times subject to change.

Ethan Allen Shopping Center, North Ave., Burlington, 863-6040.

11:01 AM

EE G! • Chef-Crafted Hearty Soups R F KIN • Fresh Salads R PA • Sandwiches & Burgers

Times subject to change. See http://www.merrilltheatres.net.

Main St., Middlebury, 388-4841. friday 16 — thursday 22 *The Family Stone 1:15, 4, 6:45, 9:15. *King Kong 12:45, 4:45, 8:30. The Chronicles of Narnia 12:30, 1:15, 3:30, 4:30, 6:30, 7:45, 9:30. Harry Potter & the Goblet of Fire 12:30, 4, 7:30.

Syriana 1, 4, 6:45, 9:35. Walk the Line 12:30, 3:30, 6:30, 9:20.

Yours, Mine & Ours 12:50, 3, 5:10, 7:15, 9:20.

12/5/05

december 14-21, 2005

TOO BUSY TO COOK?

All shows daily unless otherwise indicated. Film times may change.

Please call theaters to confirm. * = New film.

Rt. 100, Morrisville, 888-3293.

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wednesday 14 — thursday 15 *King Kong 4:20, 8. The Chronicles of Narnia 4, 6:30, 9:10. Harry Potter & The Goblet of Fire 4, 6:30, 9:15. friday 16 — thursday 22 *King Kong 4:15 (Fri-Sun), 7:45.

The Chronicles of Narnia 2:30 (Fri-Sun), 6:30, 9:10. Pride & Prejudice 2:30 & 4:45 (Fri-Sun), 7, 9:15.

12/12/05 2:26:33 PM

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Schedules for the following theaters are not available at press time.

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CAPITOL SHOWPLACE 93 State Street, Montpelier, 229-0343.

THE ECLIPSE THEATER Rt. 100, Waitsfield, 496-7787.

PARAMOUNT THEATRE 211 North Main Street, Barre, 479-4921.

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MASHED RUSSETS WITH LEEKS & MELTED MARSCAPONE 3 tablespoons butter • 1/2 tsp sugar • salt & pepper 4 medium leeks (white and pale green parts only), halved lengthwise, rinsed, dried and chopped (about 5 cups) 1/2 cup (or more) whole milk • 12 garlic cloves, coarsely chopped (about 1/2 cup) 3 3/4 pounds russet potatoes, peeled, cut into 1-inch pieces • 3/4 cup mascarpone cheese (about 6 ounces) Melt butter in large nonstick skillet over medium heat. Add leeks, sprinkling with sugar and stir to coat. Cover and cook until leeks are tender and golden brown, stirring every 5 minutes, about 20 minutes total. Season to taste with salt and pepper. (Can be prepared 1 day ahead. Cover and refrigerate. Rewarm over medium heat before using.) Combine 1/2 cup milk and garlic in medium saucepan. Bring to simmer over medium-low heat. Reduce heat to very low, cover, and cook until garlic is soft, about 10 minutes. Remove from heat. Using back of fork, mash milk-garlic mixture to paste. Set aside. Cook potatoes in large pot of boiling salted water until tender, about 25 minutes. Drain well. Return potatoes to same pot; mash until almost smooth.

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B SEVEN DAYS 03B art

art review exhibitions

03B 03B

13B calendar scene@ 14B calendar listings 15B THU.15 - SUN.18

JEST RIGHT

25B help

yourself classes wellness

33B 29B

30B classifieds auto homeworks spacefinder

29B 34B 36B

38B personals 42B employment >>> funstuff lulu eightball ogg’s world idiot box red meat maakies’ ted rall straight dope american elf mild abandon astrology 7D crossword lola herb and rose

09B 09B 09B 09B 09B 09B 11B 11B 11B 24B 24B 38B 40B

FRONT PAGE GALLERY “Noah’s Ark Revisited,” oil painting by Duker Bower, Charlotte.

SUBMISSION GUIDELINES Seven Days accepts hi-resolution digital files and full-color reproductions of 2-dimensional artwork from Vermont artists for a one-time, non-paying exhibition in the FRONT PAGE GALLERY of Section B. Submissions must be vertically oriented, non-originals no larger than 8 1/2" x 11". Please do not send work in a current public exhibit. We will only return artwork that includes a SASE with the appropriate postage. Please include your name, address, phone number, title of the works and medium. Send submissions to: SEVEN DAYS, c/o FPAG, PO Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402 or email to: fpag@sevendaysvt.com. No phone calls, please.

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Some other sex secret you wish you could tell?

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We’ll spill the beans — anonymously, of course — in our Sex Issue, February 1, 2006.

Don’t worry about length or language. Just come clean.

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Seven Days Sex Issue February 1

Send us your sex secrets by January 27.

Online at sevendaysvt.com, sex@sevendaysvt.com or mail to Sex Secrets, Seven Days, P.O. Box 1164 Burlington, VT 05402-1164

SEVEN DAYS

www.sevendaysvt.com/ar t

art review

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december 14-21, 2005

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art 03B

<art >

BY MARC AWODEY <exhibitions>

CALL TO ARTISTS THE LAZY PEAR GALLERY in Montpelier seeks artists for an upcoming show focused on fun and playful uses of fabric in art. Deadline: January 15. Check http://www.lazypear.com for details.

OPENINGS

Art Supreme

A EXHIBIT Galen Cheney: “New Paintings,” Vermont Supreme Court Lobby, Montpelier.

Through December 30.

ARTWORK “A Daughter’s Prayer” by Galen Cheney

PHOTO Marc Awodey

bstract Expressionism’s allure is that the style creates infinite worlds without having to replicate or refer to everyday forms. Galen Cheney combines the power of subjective expressionism with the directness of nonobjective abstraction in her show of 21 paintings, entitled simply “New Works,” in the lobby of the Vermont Supreme Court. In doing so, she courageously drags the venerable idiom of Abstract Expressionism into the 21st century.

There are no central themes to Cheney’s show other than color and texture. The vertical 53-by-33-inch “Crimson Promise” is a thick, white field flooded by warm colors. Red, pink and crimson, smeared over heavily textured, frothy whiteness, emanates a rouge-y glow. Cheney has skillfully integrated red and white without accidentally conjuring “blood on snow.” She also balanced the painting upon an invisible vertical axis. A soft-edged crimson rectangle floats in the stratosphere of “Crimson Promise” like a counterweight to the reds in the lower section of the canvas.

In “A Daughter’s Prayer,” seven wavy lines topped with “buds” collectively resemble a decaying bouquet, and reach toward three oblong shapes hovering at the upper edge of the 44by-56-inch canvas. Viewers could

invent narratives to explain Cheney’s forms, or just observe the abstract activities blooming across each of her picture planes. Attempting to comprehend this artist’s frenetic methods of applying paint is challenging enough.

Mysterious foreign substances also appear in Cheney’s mixed-media works. Wax, sticks, twigs and perhaps dirt serve to heap mounds of color upon color. The 30-by-53-inch horizontal composition “Orange Crush” includes two long sticks, both about 3 feet long, buried horizontally in the painting’s center. The sticks create a three-dimensional horizon line that anchors the yellow-orange composition. Viscous red and green sheets of color, spread with a palette knife, seem to hang beneath the sticks. But Cheney isn’t satisfied with one variety of hue; she creates many, enlivening her works with finely calibrated chromatic distinctions.

Form and line often appear as mere byproducts of negative space in these paintings. In the roughly 3-foot-square “Red Rims, Rocks,” translucent shapes are crowded into the center of the painting between umber, potatoshaped chambers in a dark field below and a misty, acidic-green atmosphere above. Rather than rival the painting’s central shapes, the underground “potatoes” simply accentuate dark space.

Likewise, lines are merely boundaries and not independent elements.

Sometimes form and line don’t appear in Cheney’s works at all. To view her somber masterpiece “Crater” is to confront a formless crater interior — or, worse, the inner walls of a grave. The 50-by-60-inch oil is pure paint, without mixed-media additives; Cheney has engineered an oppressive environment with both warm and cool variations of black. A few strokes of white tumble from the upper rim of the image like crumbs of soil falling into a hole. Her statement is a nonobjective, nihilistic icon of dissolution.

In 1943, deans of Abstract Expressionism Barnett Newman, Mark Rothko and Adolph Gottlieb published a collective manifesto in The New York Times, asserting: “To us, art is an adventure into an unknown world of the imagination which is fancy-free and violently opposed to common sense. There is no such thing as a good painting about nothing. We assert that the subject is critical.”

And the subject in Abstract Expressionism — in contrast to much contemporary modernism that includes extensive “statements” from the artists — need not be explained in words.

Cheney’s paintings, for example, speak volumes all by themselves. m

FRED G HILL: "Chips From a Few Blocks," color photographs. Fletcher Room, Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 865-7211.

Reception December 14, 7:30-8:45 p.m.

Through December.

SUKI CIAPPARA: "Fertile Mystery," handcrafted, needle-felted wall hangings of female deities. Salaam Boutique, Montpelier, 2234300. Reception December 15, 5-8 p.m.

Through January.

CHRISTOPHER MCBRIDE: Nature photography. Trillium Cafe, Hinesburg, 482-6727.

Meet the artist December 15, 6:30-7 p.m.

Through January 1.

DOUG DESJARDINS: "Art From the Heart," playful paintings on recycled wood and canvas. The Cheshire Cat Art & Artwear, Montpelier, 223-1981. Reception December 15, 5-8 p.m. Through March.

TAGUR FOOTWEAR: An exhibit of athletic shoes customized by world-renowned graffiti artists and illustrators. Firehouse Center for the Visual Arts, Burlington, 865-7165.

Reception December 16, 7-10 p.m., with music by DJ A-Dog. Through December 17.

CHRISTINE HOLZSCHUH: "River Branches and Connections," mixed-media works. Pickering room, Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 865-7200. Reception December 17, 3-5 p.m. Through December.

LIZA COWAN: "Fake!" Paintings by Liza Leger, Liza Picasso, Liza Matisse, etc.; and DAVID KLEIN: "Beanie the Singing Dog," shadow boxes and installation. Pine Street Art Works, Burlington, 658-6266. Gallery grand opening and reception December 17, 2-5 p.m. Through February 15.

DUKER BOWER: Contemporary paintings, sculpture and photography; also ROD PETERSON & EVA CINCOTTA: Paintings. Mt. Philo Gallery, Inn at Charlotte B&B, 4252934. Gallery grand opening and reception December 17, 6-9 p.m. Through March 20.

GEORGE WILLIAM WHITAKER: The gallery accepts a gift from Rena Chernick of a collection of paintings by "the dean of Providence painters." Bundy Center for the Arts, Waitsfield, 496-4781, ext. 26.

Reception December 19, 5-8 p.m.

Reservations requested.

TALKS/ EVENTS PHOTOGRAPHY CRITIQUE: Members of the Firehouse Community Darkroom meet to discuss their work. Firehouse Center for the Visual Arts, Burlington, 865-7166.

December 14, 6-8 p.m.

JANET VAN FLEET: A studio sale featuring paintings, 3-D work and seconds of ornaments and earrings. Studio at SPA Building, Barre, 272-5956. December 15 & 16, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. or by appointment.

HOLIDAY OPEN STUDIOS: More than 20 artists and artisans, from the E-1 Studio Collective, E-2 Studio, Studio D-3, Alley Cat Arts, Conant Custom Brass, Klinefelter Studio, Studio 277 and Christine Cole Studio, invite viewers and shoppers, Pine Street, Burlington, terry@burlingtonglass.net.

December 16, noon - 8 p.m., and December 17, 10 a.m. - 5 p.m.

TALKS/EVENTS >> 05B PLEASE NOTE: Exhibitions are written

by Pamela Polston; spotlights written

by Marc Awodey. Listings are restricted to exhibits in truly public places; exceptions may be made at the discretion of the editor. Submit art exhibitions at www.sevendaysvt.com/art or send via email by Thursday at 5 p.m., including info phone number, to galleries@sevendaysvt.com.

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04B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

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SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2003

|

art 05B

<exhibitions> TALKS/EVENTS << 03B ARTISANSâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; SHOWCASE: Imported textile works by 20 artists from Africa, from table mats to children's backpacks; also, handmade cards by local students. Dianne Shullenberger Gallery, Jericho, 899-4993. Open house December 17 & 18, 10 a.m. - 5 p.m.

ONGOING CARRIE R. DIEHL: Acrylic paintings, Lake Champlain series. Penny Cluse Cafe, Burlington, www.carriehiehl.com. Through December.

VSA ARTS VERMONT: Adults and students of the Self-Advocacy Theater Programs and Awareness Theater Company show their works on the ducts, railings and ceilings.

City Market, Burlington, www.vsavt.org.

Through December.

MICHAEL SMITH & MARY ELLEN MANOCK: A collaborative show of paintings. Union Station, Burlington, 863-6627. Through January 2.

GROUP SHOW: Artworks in multiple media by Janet Biehl, Kit Donnelly, Mary Johnson, Sara Katz, Lynda McIntyre, Ayn Baldwin Riehle and Lynn Rupe. Maltex Building, Burlington, 865-7166. Through March.

CAROLYN SHATTUCK: "Unstill Lifes," paintings, Skyway Corridor; and CASEY BLANCHARD: "Migration Home," monotypes, Gates 1 & 2, Burlington International Airport Gallery, 865-7166. Through January.

ALLISTAIR MCCALLUM: "Fallen Birches, paintings. Enigma Gallery, Essex, 879-9220.

Through December.

BILL CROSBY: "Landscapes," abstracted acrylic paintings. Doll-Anstadt Gallery, Burlington, 864-3661. Through December. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;WINTER WOODSâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: A group show featuring photographs by Jeri Lynn Eisenberg and works by 15 others in multiple media.

Furchgott Sourdiffe Gallery, Shelburne, 9853848. Through January 24.

ALEX HIRKA: New collages. City Market Cafe, Burlington, 863-3659. Through December.

STEWART MCHENRY: "The Near and Far," color photography, Dining Room; and DASHA KALISZ: ceramics, Solarium. Daily Planet, Burlington, 862-9647. Through December.

BOB HOOKER: "Embracing Transformation," paintings in acrylic and collage, reflecting patterns of decay and disruption. Kolvoord Community Room, Brownell Library, Essex Junction, 878-6955. Through December.

SARAH NEITH: "Cityscapes," collage and paintings based on local nightlight.

Metropolitan Gallery, Burlington City Hall, 865-7165. Through December 30.

PHOTO: MARC AWODEY JEREMY GANTZ: "Portraits of Music," photographs of local musicians. Firehouse Community Darkroom, Burlington, 865-7166.

Through February 4.

FRED G HILL: "Chips From a Few Blocks," color photographs, Fletcher Room; and CHRISTINE HOLZSCHUH: "River Branches and Connections," mixed-media works, Pickering Room; and MAGGIE STANDLEY: "Reclamation," mixed-media artworks about symbolism of birth, Mezzanine Gallery.

Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 864-4385.

Through December.

NICK CHAPPELL: "Rapt," paintings and photographs. Studio STK, Burlington, 657-3333.

Through December 24.

BRIAN MOHR & EMILY JOHNSON: "Wild People, Wild Places II," outdoor photographs from Vermont to the southern Andes.

Uncommon Grounds, Burlington, 496-5434.

Through December 27.

DOSTIE: "Belle Voyeur," new paintings. Club Metronome, Burlington, bellevoyeur@ yahoo.com. Through January 15.

JOSHUA HIGHTER: "Figures on Paper," drawings and paintings. ArtSpace 150 at the Men's Room, Burlington, 864-2088. Through December. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;STOREFRONT/USEFUL ITEMS UNDER $100â&#x20AC;&#x2122;: Artists Heidi Cody, Yuken Teruya and Colin Livingston explore consumerism and critique visual culture in an exhibit filling half the gallery. In the other half, designers from Vermont and elsewhere display limited editions of practical objects. Firehouse Gallery, Burlington, 865-7165. Through December 18.

KIMBERLEE FORNEY: Fun and fantastical artwork. Wine Works Bar, Burlington, 310-9159.

Through December.

KATE PUCCIA & JOHN OSMOND: "Forge & Fracture," collaborative and independent two- and three-dimensional works in marble, bronze, canvas, paint, steel, wood and glass.

Flynndog, Burlington, 863-2227. Through December.

JENNI MARONEY: "3rd World Experience," black-and-white and color photographs of the people of Central America. 1/2 Lounge, Burlington, 233-2504. Through December 15. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;FIFTY-FIFTYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: Custom handbags, or sk8bags, from the New York label Beck(y), featuring works by more than 20 designers. Pursuit Gallery, Burlington, 862-3883. Through December.

JANET BIEHL: Etchings of Burlington; and ANDREW KLINE: Old West Church photographs; and LYNA LOU NORDSTROM: Handpulled color prints; and DAVID SOKOL: Insects, crustaceans and other prints.

Artpath Gallery, Wing Building, Burlington, 563-2273. Through January 2006.

MIKEY WELSH: "Potatoes Hurl Midnight Onions," new paintings. Amy E. Tarrant Gallery, Flynn Center, Burlington, 652-4500.

Through December.

MARK TOUGIAS: "A Sense of Place," oil landscapes. Emile A. Gruppe Gallery, Jericho, 899-3211. Through December 18.

NANCY ELLIS: "New England in Watercolor," paintings. Cathedral Church of St. Paul, Burlington, 864-0471. Through December 15. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;WORLDS OF TEAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: Objects from the permanent collection exploring tea culture in Western and Asian cultures; and EADWEARD MUYBRIDGE: "Studies in Locomotion," pioneering photographs documenting human and animal movement. Fleming Museum, UVM, Burlington, 656-0750. Through December 16.

ANN LABERGE: An interactive, multimedia installation based on the distortions, myths and lies we are encouraged to believe. Peace & Justice Center Lobby, Burlington, 6555845. Through December.

:: champlain valley JOSIAH JACKSON: Photographs from journeys in Vermont and New Zealand, in handmade wooden frames. Walkover Gallery, Bristol, 453-3188. Through January 29.

MICHAEL EGAN: A retrospective in glass works. Frog Hollow, Middlebury, 388-3177.

Through December. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;SMALL ART SHOW & SALEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: Small, affordable art by 22 local artists; sales benefit building renovations. Town Hall Theater, Middlebury, 388-1436. Through December 23.

LINCOLN COMMUNITY SCHOOL: Student drawings, paintings and photographs show connections to land, garden, river and community; also, the frog collection of Lisa Cloe. Lincoln Library, 453-2665. Through December.

LES POSDAMER: "Faces & Places," portraits and scenes from around the world. Tully & Marie's Restaurant, Middlebury, 388-4182.

Through December.

HANDS TOGETHER

Fine art? Fine crafts? From

paintings to woodworking, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s something for everyone at Studio Place Arts in Barre this month. Well, maybe everyone but the cat portrayed in Janet MacLeodâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lighthearted painting,

:: central SUSAN OSMOND: New paintings in oil. Pink Shutter, Montpelier, 223-3413. Through December.

STEPHANIE LAHAR: Pastel and watercolor landscapes, real and surreal. Conoscenti, Montpelier, 223-2485. Through December.

MICHAEL T. JERMYN: "Absolute Illumination," new still-life and travel photographs. La Brioche, Montpelier, 223-1570. Through December.

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06B

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12/5/05

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1:41 PM

Page 1

SEVEN DAYS

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december 14-21, 2005

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art 07B

<exhibitions> ONGOING << 05B

PHOTO: MARC AWODEY

HOLIDAY GIFT BAZAAR: Affordable fine arts ‘CELEBRATE MORE!’: Paintings and photoand crafts exhibit and sale. Chandler Gallery, graphs by members of Studio Place Arts.

Randolph, 728-9878. Thursdays - Saturdays Barre Opera House Lobby, 479-7069. through December 18.

Through December.

SARAH MUNRO: "Stream of Consciousness," JAVIER CINTRON: Prints and paintings. Main abstract colorist expressionist works. City Street Museum, White River Junction, 356Center, Montpelier, 229-6219. Through 2776. Through December.

January 6.

GALEN CHENEY: New paintings. Vermont GRETCHEN ZIMMER: "Homage to Claude Supreme Court Lobby, Montpelier, 828-4784.

Monet, 'Water Lilies,'" paintings. Rhapsody Through December 30.

Cafe, Montpelier, 229-6112. Through KATIE FLINDALL: "My Season of Peace," December. watercolors and pen-and-ink works. Moon LISA CARPENTER & ROBIN SHEPHEARD: House Art Gallery, Waterbury, 882-1079.

"Dieachselen Zuchen," photography and mulThrough December 20. timedia. Shoe Horn, Montpelier, 229-5454.

SEVEN VERMONT SCULPTORS: New works by Through December.

Willard Boepple, Chris Curtis, Patricia de JULIE RUTH: Paintings; and SHANNON Gogorza, Nancy Diefenbach, Lynn Newcomb, MATTHEW LONG: Sculptures in wood, steel Tari Swenson and Judith Wrend. Sculpture and stone; and other artists in multiple Garden, Vermont Arts Council, Montpelier, media. Julie Ruth Studio & Gallery, 23 South 828-5422. Through May 2007.

Main St., Waterbury, 730-2527. Friday, Saturday and Sunday hours, or call for appointment. Through January.

HOLIDAY ART SHOW: Fine, affordable art by ‘THE JURY IS OUT’: The Art Resource six Vermont artists: Shabnam Sadr and Linda Association 30th annual holiday exhibit with Bryan, photography; Gretchen Bittner, works in multiple media. T.W. Wood Gallery, prints; Heather Bushey, paintings; Hosanna Montpelier, 828-8743. Through December Bogert, pottery; and Tom Arnold, metal 22. sculpture. The Well Gallery, Jeffersonville, GRAND OPENING SHOW: A brand-new gallery 644-6700. Through January 13. presents 11 Vermont artists with playful or HOLIDAY SHOW: "Vermont Artists in Europe," offbeat styles. The Lazy Pear Gallery, 154 featuring small works by Gil Perry, Jan Main St., Montpelier, 223-7680. Through Brough, Rob O'Brien, Peter A. Miller and January 30.

Elizabeth Allen. Vermont Fine Art Gallery, ‘GIFT OF ART’: A holiday show with photoStowe, 253-9653. Through January 2. graphs, prints, sculptures, jewelry and more.

‘GREAT GRAPHICS’: An exhibition of vintage Carving Studio & Sculpture Center, West posters from 1895-1945 advertising travel, Rutland, 438-2097. Through December 24. skiing, movies, patriotism and propaganda.

SANDRA SHENK: "Meditation on Autumn Clarke Galleries Cold Comfort Farm Annex, Reflections," Polaroid transfers and monStowe, 253-7116. Through February 15. tages; and JENNIFER PEREILLE: "Brilliant WINTER SHOW: More than 20 local artists Hues of Summer," mixed-media paintings. exhibit their works. Stowe Town Hall, The Green Bean Art Gallery at Capitol stowestudioarts@pshift.com. Through Grounds, Montpelier, artwhirled23@ March. yahoo.com. Through December.

YOUNG ARTISTS JURIED EXHIBITION: JANET MACLEOD: "Country Stores," paintings.

Artwork in multiple media by area high Governor's Office, Pavilion Office Building, school students. Bryan Memorial Gallery, Montpelier, 828-0749. Through December.

Jeffersonville, 644-5100. Through STUDIO SALE: Paintings and sculptures by December 18.

Axel Stohlberg. Axel's Frameshop & Gallery, E.C. RACICOT: "Functional Bathroom Art," vanWaterbury, 244-7801. Through December 20. ities using recycled wood and hand-thrown CHAFFEE’S HOLIDAY SHOW: Samantha Talbotstoneware basins. Vermont Maple Wood Kelly, Ann McFarren, Robert Sydorowich, Gallery, Stowe, 253-8211. Through Andrea Stix Waserman and students of December.

Rutland Town School exhibit their works.

JOSEPH SALERNO: Paintings and drawings.

Chaffee Art Center, Rutland, 775-0356.

Julian Scott Memorial Gallery, Johnson State Through January 2.

College, 635-1469. Through December 17.

‘CELEBRATE!’: Paintings, ceramics, photograGRACE HOLIDAY EXHIBIT: Selected works by phy, textiles, glass, woodworking and more Merrill Densmore, T.J. Goodrich, L. Fogg, by gallery members fill all three floors.

Larry Bissonnette, Ken Bridges, Dot Kibbee, Studio Place Arts, Barre, 479-7069. Through James Nace and Gayleen Aiken. GRACE December.

Gallery, Old Firehouse, Hardwick, 472-6857.

LINDA HOGAN: Photographs. Montpelier City January Through 5x6-MMFA101205 10/10/05 11:43 AM Page 1 25.

Hall, 229-9416. Through December.

:: northern

LUCINDA MASON: "The Painted Surface," oil paintings from the artist's "Made in Montréal" series. Flavor Restaurant, Stowe, 253-3075. Through January 1.

AFRICAN ART: SCULPTURE & CULTURE: New and traditional pieces of art from Congo, Tanzania, Mali and Burkino Faso. Stowe Craft Design Center, 253-7677. Through December 15.

‘LAND & LIGHT LANDSCAPE EXHIBITION’: An annual invitational featuring regional artists in the landscape tradition. Bryan Memorial Gallery, Jeffersonville, 644-5100.

Through December 18.

:: southern DECEMBER SOLO EXHIBITIONS: Eight regional artists in multiple media show their works. Yester House, Southern Vermont Art Center, Manchester, 362-1405. Through January 8.

:: regional KERRY O. FURLANI: "The Artist's Hand: Slate in Bas Relief," 19 slate carvings. Slate Valley Museum, Granville, N.Y., 518-642-1417.

Through December.

‘SENSE OF THE CITY’: A multimedia exhibition about urban phenomena and perceptions, through September; and "EMPIRE": A visual essay by photographer John Gossage on the relationship between architecture and power, Octagonal Gallery, through March 12.

Canadian Centre for Architecture, Montréal, 514-939-7000.

‘RIGHT UNDER THE SUN’: Landscapes of Provence, paintings from Classicism to Modernism (1750-1920). Montréal Museum of Fine Arts, 1-877-BEAUX-ARTS. Through January 8.

‘COLLECTANEA’: Objects from the permanent collection illustrate the "museum as hunter/gatherer," Gutman Gallery. Hood Museum of Art, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 603-646-2808. Through February.

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POOLING ‘RESOURCES’ The sophisticated mixed-media collage “House of Hawk, House of Dove” (pictured)

by Jane Pincus is one of more than 100 artworks in the Art Resource Association’s 30th annual holiday exhibition, “The Jury Is Out.” It’s an impressive, all-media show featuring most of central Vermont’s strongest artists. The Romare Bearden influence evident in Pincus’ work should be no surprise — she was an acquaintance of the masterful collagist. “The Jury Is Out” appears at T.W. Wood Gallery in Montpelier through December 22.

Provence in Montreal VAN GOGH, CÉZANNE, RENOIR, MONET… From September 22, 2005 to January 8, 2006 “ONE OF THE SMARTEST AND MOST PLEASURABLE SHOWS OF THE YEAR” TIME MAGAZINE, R. LACAYO Open 7 days a week Monday to Sunday from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m.

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The exhibition is organized by the Montreal Museum of Fine Arts in partnership with the Musées de Marseille.

Paul Cézanne, The Pigeon Tower at Bellevue (detail), about 1894-96, oil on canvas. The Cleveland Museum of Art, The James W. Corrigan Memorial. Photo © The Cleveland Museum of Art.

08B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

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Comment Cards: Here are 7 of the more than 60 comments posted on www.sevennightsvt.com about local restaurants: +++++ Yummy, yummy in my tummy (Bangkok Bistro, Nov.18) I love the food, the owners are extremely nice and I love the food. I have never had a bad meal here. Apps, lunch, dinner. All great! Service can fluctuate, but is generally good. +++++ Pretty good Mexican! (Roque’s, Nov.18) This restaurant was a surprise for those of us that were tired of bland Mexican food in Vermont. The homemade corn tortillas are great as are the margaritas. I particularly like that they give you beans and salsa as a free appetizer. +++++ My Favorite! (Toscano, Nov.22) Toscano is, without a doubt, my favorite restaurant. Anytime I have a special occasion, I always choose Toscano — I’ve done birthday dinners, graduations and anniversaries at Toscano. The service is impeccable, without being over the top (your water glass is always full!). Some of my favorites — the trout, beef tournedos and the tenderloin. If you’re looking for an appetizer, try the fried artichokes. Oh, and they make a great dirty gin martini. +++++ The Spot (1/2 Lounge, Dec.1) The 1/2 is a “The Spot” for excellent cocktails. Cocktails made with fine ingredients (extra points for having Hendrick’s Gin and a gold star for having a menu cocktail with Hendrick’s in it), & bar staff that can rightfully be called mixologists. Excellent, attentive, and informative waitstaff. A city treasure.

+++++ Always a pleasant experience (The Daily Planet, Dec. 8) I have dined at The Daily Planet numerous times, and can honestly say I’ve always had a great experience. Only once did I order an item I was not fond of, but everything else was up to par. I really enjoy eating at a restaurant that offers fabulous vegetarian options and actually knows how to prepare them.

+++++ Japanese Nirvana (Asiana House, Dec.11) This gem has some of the best Japanese cuisine in Burlington — okay... perhaps the best in the state. The sushi and sashimi are fresh and abundantly portioned, with gorgeous presentation — on platters, platforms, and “boats,” with attractive garnishes and/or sauces. Smoked octopus salad is delicate and refreshing. The soups and noodle dishes are lovely, and the tonkatsu (meat cutlets) are to die for. Service is efficient and friendly, and most servers are very knowledgeable about the menu, and happy to describe the specials, and make suggestions. In the space that used to house a Tapas restaurant, Asiana House’s dining room is small and modest, but not unpleasant; and reservations are a good idea, especially on weekends. We were very surprised, and this has become one of our favorite dining reoccurrences. If you like this brand of cuisine, you won’t be disappointed. +++++ Fabulous bar (Cannon’s, Dec.11) Best calamari in town. Be sure to save room for dessert!

SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | the funnies 09B

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10B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

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SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | the funnies 11B

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“Do you ever have those moments of pure black nihilistic fantasy where you just don’t give a damn about Harry Potter, or Eminem, or Yoda, or any of em’ ?”

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by CECIL ADAMS

illustration: slug signorino

all worthwhile human knowledge

Dear Cecil, A recent move has brought me to a comfy apartment building in friendly Medford, Massachusetts, complete with a washer and dryer hookup. However, while having a washer and dryer hookup is helpful, it is much more practical to have a working hookup, which, alas, I do not (dirty scamming realtors are to blame). So I am left with a dilemma: (a) walk up the street to the laundromat; (b) drive home to mum and dad (3.5 hours) once a month; or (c) screw it and give up washing altogether. My fear with respect to (a) lies in what sort of evil lives in the neighborhood laundromat’s great tumbling vats.

I’m not suggesting the locals or even the owners of said facility are dirty; I’m just curious what kind of statistics you can throw out concerning sanitation and public laundering facilities. I’m concerned that my girlfriend and I will suffer some itchy affliction if we don’t boil our clothes after washing them in a public spot. Let me know!

Another minion boggled by your prodigious gray matter You don’t hear much about the dangers of laundromats these days, no doubt due to efforts by the coin-op cartel to suppress the grisly truth, and I regret to say I’ve been unable to put my hand to any reliable enumeration of injuries, epidemics and deaths. Anecdotes, on the other hand, I’ve got out the wazoo. Herewith a sampling guaranteed to chill the blood: • Snails. OK, so this report comes from Ethiopia, where many wash their duds in streams. Presumably matters are more advanced in Medford, but if they let the laundry hookup in your apartment go to hell, who’s to say what goes on in those rusty pipes beneath the laundromat, unseen by wary eyes? The Ethiopians know. Specifically, they know about the snail Biomphalaria pfeifferi, intermediate host to Schistosoma mansoni, a parasitic worm.

You can guess where this is going: the schistosomes contaminate water with their eggs (I’m not telling exactly how the

eggs get in the water, other than to recommend you keep a close watch on those dirty locals), the eggs develop inside the snails, then the mature parasites get into the water and from there they get into you — to be precise, into your liver, lungs, intestines or bladder. The resultant condition, schistosomiasis, afflicts some 200 million people worldwide. Streamside laundry is evidently a major transmission route in Ethiopia, where folks have been experimenting with a natural soap and snailicide known as endod, which makes your whites whiter and your snails dead. Some may say: Who needs endod? Nobody gets schistosomiasis in the U.S. Spoken like somebody who’s looking to be the first.

• Microbial contamination. Browsing through the September issue of Journal of Hospital Infection, I see where “textiles sent to hospital laundries contain many types of pathogenic organisms,” which may be of pestilential effect. A study in — OK, Slovenia, but let’s not put on airs — found on investigation that “the sanitary condition of [a local hospital] laundry did not reach the required level” (probable translation: the place was a sty), wherefore “fundamental sanitation measures were instituted,” which I take to mean they sent in a squad of babushkas to kick some housecleaning butt. We’ve already established that mollusks and parasites may be an issue at the local lavanderia. On the assumption that some of your fellow patrons will be washing bedclothes after their forthcoming bouts with schistosomiasis, you’d better set a petri dish out for microbes, too.

• Uveal melanoma, i.e., cancer of the pigmented layer of the eye. Recent research has found that European laundry workers have triple the usual rate of this dreadful ailment.

No one is publicly saying why, but for those of us capable of putting two and two together (see snails, etc., above) the message is all too clear: See what you can do about that washer/dryer hookup, or learn to love the dirt.

I’m a 16 year ol physics student i have been noticing when im stiring my coffe int he morning that the bubbles go into the center now i would expect as i have been on many anti gravity rides that they would go outwoulds eg centrefugal foces. now as the bubbles are lighter that the actually liquid you would expect it can you please help me as none of my teachers can answer jared I’m not saying you don’t need my help, kid, but it isn’t with physics. You’ve answered your own question. Since the bubbles are lighter than the liquid, they’re shoved out of the way — that is, into the center of the cup — by the denser coffee crowding its way toward the rim. For the same reason, if you have a helium balloon floating inside your car and you slam on the brakes, the balloon paradoxically will be thrown backward while — indeed, because — everything else in the car, including the heavier-than-helium air, is flung to the front.

CECIL ADAMS

Is there something you need to get straight? Cecil Adams can deliver the Straight Dope on any topic.

Write Cecil Adams at the Chicago Reader, 11 E. Illinois, Chicago, IL 60611, or email him at cecil@chireader.com.

12B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

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SEVEN DAYS PRESENTS

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SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | calendar 13B

DECEMBER 14-21

<calendar > www.sevendaysvt.com/calendar

FRIDAY 16

NUN FUNNIER

What do you get when you cross “Crime Scene International” with the Gospels? In Sister’s Christmas Catechism a scholarly nun tracks down centuries-old clues to a Biblical mystery: what happened to the Magis’ gold? A tonguein-cheek tale relates that after the three kings brought the heavy metal to Baby Jesus, it went missing. Catholic comedienne Maripat Donovan created the musical revue as a follow-up to her Late Nite Catechism show, which played the Flynn last January. Like its predecessor, this sister act encourages audience participation.

Join in as the habit-clad harridan hypothesizes about what really happened away in the manger, aided by the Lyric Theatre Chorus, a magnifying glass, and “divine” know-how.

‘SISTER’S CHRISTMAS CATECHISM’ Friday, December 16, Flynn MainStage, Burlington, 8 p.m. $24-38. Info, 863-5966. http://www.flynntix.org

:: submission guidelines All submissions are due in writing at noon on the Thursday before publication. Be sure to include the following in your email or fax: name of event, brief description, specific location, time, cost and contact phone number. SEVEN DAYS edits for space and style.

MAIL: SEVEN DAYS, P.O. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402-1164 FAX: 802-865-1015 Email: calendar@sevendaysvt.com.

<calendar> Listings and spotlights

by Meghan Dewald.

14B

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<calendar >

scene@GINGERBREAD HOUSE EXHIBIT VERMONT FOLKLIFE CENTER, MIDDLEBURY, SATURDAY, DECEMBER 3, 1 P.M. When I pushed open the doors of the Vermont Folklife Center in Middlebury, it hit me like a candy-scented tidal wave — a smell so deliciously sugary that it seemed almost tangible. Beneath swinging chains of paper gingerbread men, 39 fantastic confections were arranged on rows of tables. An elegant, white-frosted church, light shining out from its candy stained-glass windows. A psychedelic Oz, the yellow-brick road winding through forests of nori-and-pretzel trees. A miniature hockey game on a rink that looked so much like real ice it was tempting to stick out a finger to see if it was cold.

“Why can’t you feel it?” a very young boy asked his mother, plaintively.

“Because it’s somebody else’s food, and we can’t touch it,” she told him.

It was Saturday, and the place was busy. Children ran from one table to another, dropping mittens and losing hats in their excitement. Their voices rose above the sound of their boots pounding on the carpet: “Wow, look at that one!” “It’s Candyland!” “Look, it’s Whoville.” “Whoa! Look at that big chocolate kiss!”

A boy in a blue jacket gazed reverently at one house, decorated with a chocolate kiss the size of his fist. His hands were twitching. “We lose a few candies every year,” said Sarah Stahl, observing from behind the counter. “I’ve seen a couple of licks.”

KATE FELD

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SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | calendar 15B

WED 14 THU 15 FRI 16 SAT 17 SUN 18 MON 19 TUE 20 WED 21

WED.14

JAMES NAISMITH PORTRAYAL: Actor Robert Cheney assumes the identity of basketball’s inventor and talks about the history of the sport.

South Burlington Community Library, noon. Free.

Info, 652-7076.

music Also, see clubdates in Section A. ST. ANDREWS PIPES & DRUMS: Got kilt? This Scottish-style marching band welcomes new members to play bagpipes or percussion. St. James Episcopal Church, Essex Junction, 7:30 p.m. Free.

Info, 879-7335.

VIOLIN RECITAL: Thirteen-year-old Vermonter Chris Stork makes strings sing at the Kellogg-Hubbard Library, Montpelier, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 223-3338.

dance ‘SALSALINA’ PRACTICE: Work on your sensuous nightclub routines at this weekly Latin dance session. Salsalina Studio, Burlington, nonmembers 6 p.m., members 7 p.m. $10. Info, 598-1077.

drama ‘THE ONCE & FUTURE UBU’: Local playwright Seth Jarvis directs his collaboratively produced political satire about a king who’s off his rocker. See review, this issue. 135 Pearl, Burlington, 8 p.m. $15. Info, 651-8877.

‘GUYS & DOLLS’: Northern Stage produces this musical comedy about the gambler-and-con-artist underside of the 1950s. Briggs Opera House, White River Junction, 7:30 p.m. $23-43. Info, 296-7000.

‘NIGHT FIRES’: Singers, dancers and actors celebrate the Winter Solstice with theatrical storytelling. Montpelier City Hall Auditorium, 8 p.m. $13-15. Info, 863-1024.

‘SEUSSICAL THE MUSICAL’ AUDITIONS: Adult singers of both genders harmonize in a co-ed tryout. The Schoolhouse, South Burlington, 5:45 p.m. Free. Info, 658-1484.

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film ‘WHERE THE TRUTH LIES’: Sex, mystery and scandal ignite this steamy film noir from director Atom Egoyan. Catamount Arts Center, St. Johnsbury, 7 p.m. $6.50. Info, 748-2600.

STOWE MOUNTAIN FILM FESTIVAL: Stephen Beattie presents clips from his documentary about Mount Mansfield Winter Academy racer Sasha Dingle. Vermont Ski Museum, Stowe, 7 p.m.

Free. Info, 253-9911.

art Also, see exhibitions in Section A. COMMUNITY DARKROOM CRITIQUE: Area photographers gather informally to share and discuss each other’s work. Firehouse Center for the Visual Arts, Burlington, 6-8 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7166.

‘FESTIVAL OF TREES & LIGHT’: The 25th anniversary of this holiday exhibit features trees trimmed with international ornaments, and a display of menorahs, dreidels and gingerbread houses. Helen Day Art Center, Stowe, noon - 5 p.m. $3. Info, 253-8358.

words POETRY OPEN MIKE: Bards take turns so everyone can read at a Boho evening of free verse. Euro Gourmet Market & Café, Burlington, 6-9 p.m.

Free. Info, 859-3467.

BOOK DISCUSSION: Readers buzz about Sue Monk Kidd’s The Secret Life of Bees. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7211.

‘FOOD FOR THOUGHT’: Sci-fi fans peek at the cyborg psyches portrayed in Philip K. Dick’s novel, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? Waterbury Public Library, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 244-7036.

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‘BRIDGING TWO CULTURES’: Author Lauretta Verret shares how her French-Canadian family coped in the border village of Derby Line. Smugglers’ Notch Lounge, 2 p.m. Free. Info, 644-1293.

LEGISLATIVE OVERVIEW: State Senator Jim Jondos and Representatives Joyce Errecart and David Zuckerman look to 2006 at a meeting of the Champlain Valley League of Women Voters.

Windjammer Restaurant, South Burlington, call for meeting time. Cost varies by lunch order.

Reservations and info, 985-9754.

kids ANIMAL FEEDING: Watch critters do dinner with help from the animal-care staff at the ECHO Center, Burlington, 10:30 a.m. & 3 p.m. $6-9.

Info, 864-1848.

BARNES & NOBLE STORYTIME: Readings of family faves provide morning fun for toddlers at Barnes & Noble, South Burlington, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 864-8001.

WESTFORD PLAYGROUP: Children gather for games, songs and stories at the Westford Library, 9:30-11:30 a.m. Free. Info, 878-5639.

PRESCHOOL STORYTIME: Tots take in their favorite tales at the Pierson Library, Shelburne, 10:30 a.m.

Free. Info, 985-5124.

BROWNELL LIBRARY STORYTIME: Picture books and puppets engage growing readers aged 3-5.

Brownell Library, Essex Junction, 10-10:45 a.m.

Free. Info, 878-6956.

WATERBURY STORYTIME: Little ones ages 2 and under get hooked on books at the Waterbury Library, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 244-7036.

HINESBURG PLAY GROUP: Youngsters let loose in a fun, friendly, toy-filled atmosphere. Hinesburg Town Hall, 10-11:30 a.m. Free. Info, 453-3038.

‘MOVING & GROOVING’: Two- to 5-year-olds boogie down to rock ’n’ roll and world-beat music.

Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free.

Info, 865-7216.

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TASTY READS: Culinary students prepare seasonal snacks after telling stories about Christmas, Hanukkah and Kwanzaa to kids in grades K-5.

Brownell Library, Essex Junction, 3:30-4:30 p.m.

Free. Registration and info, 878-6956.

WINTER CELEBRATION: Families catch a concert by music man Peter Alsen. Dorothy Alling Memorial Library, Williston, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 878-4918.

HOMESCHOOLER CLUB CAROLS: Students sing along with or listen to guitarist Debi Gray.

Lincoln Library, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 453-2665.

sport SENIOR EXERCISE: The 60-plus set benefits from stretches and strength training. Senior Community Center, The Pines, South Burlington, 2:30 p.m. $2. Info, 658-7477.

activism BURLINGTON PEACE VIGIL: Activists stand together in opposition to the U.S. occupation of Iraq. Top of Church Street, Burlington, 5-5:30 p.m. Free. Info, 863-2345.

INTERNATIONAL SOCIALISTS: Marx-minded activists strategize about the labor, feminist and antiwar movements. Room 102, Lafayette Hall, UVM, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Child care and info, 318-3453.

MERGER TASK FORCE: Residents and officials from Essex and Essex Junction work on a plan to combine the two towns. Lincoln Hall, Essex Junction, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 878-1341.

ZONING REWRITE PUBLIC FORUM: Burlington residents put in their two cents about upcoming changes to city land-use laws. Champlain Elementary School, Burlington, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7136.

PUBLIC PRE-DESIGN FORUM: Rutland residents offer feedback on possible layouts for a future recreation complex. Godnick Adult Center, Rutland, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 773-1822.

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‘TREES FOR TEENS’: Sales of evergreens and holiday ornaments help support a local youth center.

In front of Montpelier City Hall, 3-6 p.m. Free.

Info, 229-9151.

GIANT HOLIDAY BOOK SALE: Purchasers pause to peruse tempting tomes for the bookworms on their lists. Kellogg-Hubbard Library, Montpelier, 10 a.m. - 8 p.m. Free. Info, 223-3338.

CABLE-ACCESS LAB: Want to be on TV? Citizens peruse archives and learn how to produce their own shows. Channel 17, Burlington, 6-9 p.m.

Free. Info, 862-3966, ext. 16.

INTERNATIONAL BOUTIQUE: Silver jewelry, musical instruments and silk scarves are among the unique offerings made in countries ranging from Bali to Egypt. Masonic Lodge, Waitsfield, noon - 6 p.m. Free. Info, 496-5500.

WOMEN BUSINESS OWNERS NETWORK: After a morning seminar on bookkeeping software, more than 40 reps present their companies’ products and services at a luncheon and mini-tradeshow.

Sheraton Hotel, South Burlington, breakfast 89:30 a.m., lunch 11:30 a.m. - 1:30 p.m. $14 & $18. Reservations and info, 363-9266.

HOUSING PROGRAM TOURS: The Addison County Parent Child Center opens a newly renovated building to kick off its first-time renters’ program.

18 Elm Street, Middlebury, tours 3-4 p.m. Free.

Info, 388-3171.

HOLIDAY HOMES: Architecture aficionados peek at other peoples’ domestic decorations. Meet at Purple Bus, St. Albans, 5:30 & 7 p.m. Free.

Registration and info, 524-1519.

‘RAPTOR RESCUE’: Take a journey through the eyes of an injured bird from rescue and rehab to eventual release. VINS Nature Center, Quechee, 11 a.m. $8. Info, 359-5000.

‘RAPTORS UP CLOSE’: Nature lovers get a look at live birds on tours of the VINS Nature Center, Quechee, 2:30 p.m. $8. Info, 359-5000.

CHOCOLATE-DIPPING DEMO: Fans of cocoa-covered confectionery see how it’s made at Laughing Moon Chocolates, Stowe, 2 p.m. Free. Info, 253-9591.

ESL GROUP: Non-native speakers learn English at the Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 7-9 p.m.

Free. Info, 865-7211.

CHESS GROUP: Beginner- and intermediate-level players strategize ways to put each other’s kings in check. South Burlington Community Library, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 652-7080.

KNITTING POSSE: Needle-wielding crafters convene over good yarns. South Burlington Community Library, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 652-7076.

HEALTH WORKSHOP: Your mom was right! A chiropractor offers spine-tingling advice on how to stay fit by sitting up straight. Discover Chiropractic, Burlington, 6:15 p.m. Free. Info, 951-5700.

VETERANS JOB NETWORKING: Ex-soldiers share labor market tips, training info and employment leads. VFW Post, Essex Junction, 9:30-11 a.m. & American Legion Post, St. Albans, 1-2:30 p.m.

Free. Info, 652-0339.

CHARITY BINGO: Players seek patterns on numbered cards, then say the magic word. Broadacres Bingo Hall, Colchester, 7 p.m. $10 for 12 cards.

Info, 860-1510.

KNITTING & RUG HOOKING: Needle-pushers create scarves, hats and mats at the Briggs Carriage Bookstore, Brandon, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 247-0050.

GINGERBREAD HOUSE EXHIBIT: Six categories of culinary creations with entirely edible trim tempt Also, see clubdates in Section A. visitors to vote for their favorite. Vermont Folklife 3x8Wizn-Feed121405 10:15 AMVERMONT Page 1MOZART FESTIVAL: The Oriana Singers Center, Middlebury, 10 a.m. -12/13/05 5 p.m. Free. Info, and the festival orchestra kick off a year of pro388-4964.

THU.15 music

grams commemorating the composer’s 250th birthday. See calendar spotlight. Unitarian Church, Burlington, 8 p.m. $25. Info, 862-7352.

CELTIC CONCERT: Members of the band Celtic Force generate breezy spirits at a holiday celebration — in Gaelic. Hauke Family Campus Center Lounge, Champlain College, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. Free.

Info, 860-2700.

HOLIDAY CAROLING: Seasonal music enlivens streets throughout downtown Rutland, 5:30 p.m.

Free. Info, 773-9380.

PLAYWRIGHT WORKING GROUP: Scene scribes present works-in-progress, then hear audience members’ opinions. Institute for Professional Practice, Berlin, 7 p.m. Free. Registration and info, 229-0112.

dance

Also, see exhibitions in Section A. ‘FESTIVAL OF TREES & LIGHT’: See December 14.

COMMUNITY DARKROOM: Shutterbugs develop film and print pictures at the Center for Photographic Studies, Barre, 6-9 p.m. $8 per hour. Info, 479-4127.

MEET THE ARTIST: Nature photographer Christopher McBride greets gallery-goers. Trillium Café, Hinesburg, 6:30-7 p.m. Donations. Info, 482-6727.

DANCES OF UNIVERSAL PEACE: Meditative movers promote peace through joyful circle dances. Unity Church of Vermont, Essex Junction, 7-9 p.m.

Donations. Info, 658-2447.

drama

film ‘WHERE THE TRUTH LIES’: See December 14.

art

words

‘THE ONCE & FUTURE UBU’: See December 14.

‘GUYS & DOLLS’: See December 14.

BOOKER PRIZE WINNERS: Readers make an initial ‘DICKENS BY CANDLELIGHT’: Audience members attempt at John Berger’s G. Charlotte Library, sip tea and nibble homemade cookies at an inti7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 425-3864. mate, three-actor adaptation of “A Christmas YVONNE DALEY: The journalism professor, biograCarol.” Waterfront Theatre, Burlington, 7 p.m. pher and director of the Green Mountain Writers’ $40. Info, 862-7469.

Conference discusses the authors profiled in her ‘THE CHRISTMAS REVELS’: This merry-making book, Vermont Writers: A State of Mind. Briggs musical stage show follows an Eastern European Carriage Bookstore, Brandon, 7 p.m. Free. Info, folktale about a simple hero and his flying ship.

247-0050.

See calendar spotlight. Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 7 p.m. $5-20. Info, 603-646-2422.

‘NEVER BEFORE SEEN’: Students at Addison ‘MEDITATION & THE BODY’: Psychologist Robert Repertory Theater stage original, one-act plays on Kest explores how physical and spiritual exercises topics from anorexia to pirate poetry slams. intersect. Unitarian Church, Montpelier, 6:30-8:30 Hannaford Career Center, Middlebury, 7:30 p.m. p.m. Free. Info, 229-6989. $10. Info, 382-1036.

TUITION ASSISTANCE INFO SESSION: Personnel ‘A CHRISTMAS CAROL’: Fans of the holiday classic with IT know-how hear how to get funds for more hold a dramatic reading of Dickens’ heartwarming tech training. Skiff Hall, Champlain College, story. Valley Players Theater, Waitsfield, 7:30 p.m.

9 a.m.1- 7 p.m. appointment.

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SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | calendar 17B

WED 14 THU 15 FRI 16 SAT 17 SUN 18 MON 19 TUE 20 WED 21

kids

RICHMOND PEACE VIGIL: Concerned citizens support U.S. troops while expressing hope for an end to Middle Eastern deployments. Bring a candle to the Congregational Church, Richmond, 5:30 p.m.

Free. Info, 434-2053.

DRINKING LIBERALLY: Bottoms-up democracy fuels discussion at a meeting of political progressives. American Flatbread, Burlington, 8-10 p.m.

Free. Info, 267-237-7488.

ANIMAL FEEDING: See December 14.

SOUTH BURLINGTON LIBRARY STORYTIME: Youngsters ages 3 to 5 get together for easy listening at the South Burlington Library, 10 a.m.

Free. Info, 652-7080.

WESTFORD STORYTIME: Kids ponder picture books and create crafts at the Westford Library, 11 a.m.

Free. Info, 878-5639.

DADS’ PLAYGROUP: Fathers and their offspring bond through fun and games. Family Center, Montpelier, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 828-8765.

KIDS’ GARDEN TOUR: Young ones explore the world of plants on a walk around the Four Seasons Garden Center, Williston, 10 a.m. & 1 p.m. Free. Info, 658-2433.

‘LITTLE ROOTS’ STORYTIME: Kids gather in the garden to hear tales about plants, flowers and bugs. Four Seasons Garden Center, Williston, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 658-2433.

BABY TIME: Little ones up to age 2 meet each other at the Pierson Library, Shelburne, 10:30 a.m. Free. Info, 985-5124.

PRESCHOOL STORYTIME: Future readers aged 2-4 take in tales at the Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10:30 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216.

MAKING GINGERBREAD HOUSES: Ages 6 and up assemble cookie-and-candy castles at the St. Albans Free Library, 6 p.m. Free. Registration and info, 524-1507.

THU 15-SUN 18

etc ‘RAPTOR RESCUE’: See December 14.

‘RAPTORS UP CLOSE’: See December 14.

CHOCOLATE-DIPPING DEMO: See December 14.

CHARITY BINGO: See December 14.

GINGERBREAD HOUSE EXHIBIT: See December 14.

‘TREES FOR TEENS’: See December 14.

GIANT HOLIDAY BOOK SALE: See December 14.

INTERNATIONAL BOUTIQUE: See December 14.

VERMONT CHESS CLUB: Pawn pushers plan out moves to better their game-play. Faith United Methodist Church, South Burlington, 7 p.m. Free.

Info, 879-0198.

MAGIC & CHOCOLATE: Prestidigitator Christopher McBride performs sleight-of-hand, followed by a tasting of cocoa-buttery sweets. The Trillium Café, Hinesburg, 7:15-8:30 p.m. Donations. Info, 482-6727.

READER MENTORSHIP TRAINING: Adult volunteers learn how to help nearby elementary school students in a weekly lunchtime read-aloud program. Edmunds Elementary School, Burlington, 9 a.m. Free. Registration and info, 660-4738.

GIFT WRAP DEPOT: Volunteers pack presents in pretty paper. Former Complete Kitchen spot, Center Street, Rutland, 5-8 p.m. Donations. Info, 773-9380.

sport HASH HOUSE HARRIERS: Nightcap, anyone? Lunar light and liquor help mad dashers see their way through a special course in honor of the full moon. Burlington City Hall Park, 6:30 p.m. $5.

Info, 845-797-8190.

activism BURLINGTON PEACE VIGIL: See December 14.

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Highlights include detailed duds and acrobatic foot-flings from the Ukrainian troupe Syzokryli Dance Ensemble. Six performances ensure everyone gets a peek at the merry-making.

‘THE CHRISTMAS REVELS’ Thursday through Sunday, December 15-18, Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., various times. $5-20. Info, 603-646-2422. http://www.revelsnorth.org dickens ad.qxd

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SEVEN DAYS

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THU.15 << 17B

FRI.16 music Also, see clubdates in Section A. VERMONT MOZART FESTIVAL: See December 15, Community Church, Stowe, 7:30 p.m. $30 includes post-concert reception. Info, 862-7352.

HOLIDAY CAROLING: See December 15, 10:30 a.m. & 6 p.m.

COUNTERPOINT SINGS NOEL: Robert De Cormier directs this pro vocal ensemble in a program of seasonal songs. St. Luke’s Episcopal Church, St. Albans, 8 p.m. $5-15. Info, 259-2327.

MICHELLE FAY BAND: Acoustic folk offsets tight harmonies at the Briggs Carriage Bookstore, Brandon, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 247-0050.

VERMONT GAY MEN’S CHORUS: The self-described “vocal minority” sings seasonal numbers at the Congregational Church, Danville, 7:30 p.m. $10.

Info, 633-3605.

GARAGE BANDS: Youth musicians step out of the carport and into the limelight at a concert highlighting local groups. Peoples Academy Auditorium, Morrisville, 7 p.m. $5. Info, 888-1261.

CAMBRIDGE CLASSIC CHORALE: A holiday concert weaves Christmas favorites into a heartfelt celebration capped by Handel’s “Hallelujah Chorus.”

Second Congregational Church, Jeffersonville, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 644-5371.

THE ADIRONDACK HARPER: Upstate New Yorkbased performer Martha Gallagher strikes Celtic chords at the FlynnSpace, Burlington, 8 p.m. $12.

Info, 863-5966.

dance CONTRA DANCE: New mom Rachel Nevitt is the caller at an evening enhanced by the fine-feathered folk band Crowfoot. Champlain Club, Burlington, 8-11 p.m. $8. Info, 863-2199.

BALLROOM DANCE SOCIAL: Singles and couples of all ages learn ballroom, swing and Latin dancing.

Jazzercize Studio, Williston, 7 p.m. $10. Info, 862-2207.

ENGLISH COUNTRY DANCE: Partners are optional for making the rounds, but clean, soft-soled shoes are a must at the First Congregational Church, Essex Junction, 7:30-10 p.m. $7. Info, 899-2378.

drama ‘THE ONCE & FUTURE UBU’: See December 14.

‘GUYS & DOLLS’: See December 14.

‘NIGHT FIRES’: See December 14, Holley Hall, Bristol.

‘DICKENS BY CANDLELIGHT’: See December 15, $20.

‘THE CHRISTMAS REVELS’: See December 15, 7:30 p.m., $10-20.

‘NEVER BEFORE SEEN’: See December 15.

‘SISTER’S CHRISTMAS CATECHISM’: This comic revue features a funny nun bent on a forensic examination of the nativity scene. See calendar spotlight. Flynn MainStage, Burlington, 8 p.m. $24-38. Info, 863-5966.

‘AN O. HENRY CHRISTMAS’: The Picket Fence Theater Company presents musical adaptations of “The Gift of the Magi” and “The Last Leaf.” Barre Opera House, 7:30 p.m. $15. Info, 476-8188.

film ‘SEPARATE LIES’: This sophisticated English drama, penned by award-winning screenwriter Julian Fellowes, navigates the complexity of an illicit affair. Catamount Arts Center, St. Johnsbury, 7 p.m. $6.50. Info, 225-8906.

‘THE MUPPET CHRISTMAS CAROL’: Kermit the Frog becomes Bob Crachit in this tongue-in-cheek take on Dickens’ classic story. Brownell Library, Essex Junction, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 878-6956.

art Also, see exhibitions in Section A. ‘FESTIVAL OF TREES & LIGHT’: See December 14.

WATERCOLOR DEMO: Local artist Peter Huntoon offers tips for wielding paint-tipped brushes. Night Owl Gallery, Rutland, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 773-9380.

words REBEL WRITERS: Co-editor Chesa Boudin and contributor Doyle Canning discuss the political perspectives assembled in Letters From Young Activists. Black Sheep Books, Montpelier, 6 p.m.

Free. Info, 225-8906.

kids ANIMAL FEEDING: See December 14.

SOUTH BURLINGTON LIBRARY STORYTIME: See December 15.

SONGS & STORIES: Kids of all ages join guitarist Matthew Witten for folk songs and funny tales.

Brownell Library, Essex Junction, 10-10:45 a.m.

Free. Info, 878-6955.

‘MUSIC WITH ROBERT AND GIGI’: Kids sing along with Robert Resnik and his fiddle-playing friend Gigi Weisman. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Registration and info, 865-7216.

SANTA CLAUS: The jolly gentleman from the North Pole greets little visitors at A Teacher’s Closet, Rutland, 5-7 p.m. Free. Info, 773-9380.

sport SENIOR EXERCISE: See December 14, 10 a.m.

activism BURLINGTON PEACE VIGIL: See December 14.

etc ‘RAPTOR RESCUE’: See December 14.

‘RAPTORS UP CLOSE’: See December 14.

CHOCOLATE-DIPPING DEMO: See December 14.

CHARITY BINGO: See December 14.

GINGERBREAD HOUSE EXHIBIT: See December 14.

‘TREES FOR TEENS’: See December 14.

GIANT HOLIDAY BOOK SALE: See December 14, 10 a.m. - 5:30 p.m.

INTERNATIONAL BOUTIQUE: See December 14.

GIFT WRAP DEPOT: See December 15.

TERTULIA LATINA: Latinoamericanos and other fluent Spanish speakers converse en español at Radio Bean, Burlington, 5:30-7:30 p.m. Free.

Info, 863-3440.

WAGON RIDES: Families take trips at horse speed through downtown. Starts at Depot Park, Rutland, 5:30-8 p.m. Free. Info, 773-9380.

ZERO ENERGY HOMES: A green-design workshop teaches would-be builders how to plan a house that produces its own power. Vermont History Center, Barre, 8:30 a.m. - 4:30 p.m. $245.

Registration and info, 824-5612.

SAT.17 music Also, see clubdates in Section A. VERMONT GAY MEN’S CHORUS: See December 16, Unitarian Church, Montpelier.

VERMONT SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA: Anthony Princiotti conducts the ensemble in Grieg’s “Peer Gynt Suite No. 1,” Sibelius’ “Symphony No. 3” and the “Inextinguishable” symphony by Carl Nielsen. Flynn MainStage, Burlington, pre-concert discussion 7 p.m., concert 8 p.m. $12-46. Info, 863-5966.

ONION RIVER CHORUS: A brass ensemble and organ round out a Renaissance rendition of O Magnum Mysterium, followed by 20th-century compositions. Universalist Church, Barre, 7:30 p.m. $10. Info, 476-4300.

DIANE ZEIGLER: The acoustic songwriter sings “December in Vermont” at a concert of her own compositions. Valley Players Theater, Waitsfield, 7 p.m. $17. Info, 496-8910.

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SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | calendar 19B

WED 14 THU 15 FRI 16 SAT 17 SUN 18 MON 19 TUE 20 WED 21

VERMONT FIDDLE ORCHESTRA: Champion fiddler Scott Campbell leads local arm-benders in a joint concert with the State Street Possum Stompers Jug Band. Chandler Center for the Arts, Randolph, 7 p.m. $8. Info, 223-8945.

DOTTIE KLINE & BETTE MOFFETT: A vocal duo offers a 50-year retrospective of Broadway love songs. Briggs See calendar spotlight. Carriage Bookstore, Brandon, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 247-0050.

RANDAL BAYS: Guests join this famous folkie for an evening of Irish fiddle and guitar music. Vermont Celtic Arts Center, Essex, 8-10 p.m. $15. Info, 899-5068.

TEADA: This traditional Irish band paces Christmas storytelling with harp, uilleann pipes and step dancing. Fuller Hall, St. Johnsbury Academy, 7:30 p.m. $18. Info, 748-2600.

LAKES REGION YOUTH ORCHESTRA: Sixty-seven youngsters in five different ensembles perform symphonic music. Fine Arts Center, Castleton State College, 7 p.m. $6. Info, 468-1119.

JON GAILMOR: The all-ages entertainer and musical storyteller performs a family concert at Montpelier City Hall Auditorium, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 229-9604.

dionist Jeremiah McLane. Capitol City Grange, Montpelier, 8 p.m. $7. Info, 744-6163.

SALSA DANCE: Experience and a partner arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t required to boogie at this all-ages Feliz Navidad celebration. St. Albans City Hall, 8 p.m. Free.

Info, 527-1192.

dance

film

BALLROOM DANCE SOCIAL: See December 16.

GREEN MOUNTAIN STEPPERS: Western-style square dancers boot up for a holly-berry hoedown with caller Al Monty of Barre. Mater Christi School Gym, 6:30-10:30 p.m. $10-12. Info, 879-9350. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;BLESSED: A HIP-HOP DANCE LIFEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: DJ Zach Johnson spins for an 18-member posse powering up moves by local choreographer Sarah Cover. See calendar spotlight. FlynnSpace, Burlington, 7 & 9:30 p.m. $12. Info, 863-5966. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;THE NUTCRACKERâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: Vermont Ballet Theater performs Tchaikovskyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s holiday fave featuring a toy soldier who comes to life on Christmas Eve. Paramount Theatre, Rutland, 2 & 7 p.m. $18-22.

Info, 775-0903.

CONTRA DANCE: Caller Nils Friedland motivates movers to music by fiddler Mary Lea and accor-

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;SEPARATE LIESâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 16.

STOWE MOUNTAIN FILM FESTIVAL: Seven friends explore remote and legendary peaks in New York, New Hampshire, Massachusetts, Maine and Vermont in this screening of Epoch. Vermont Ski Museum, Stowe, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 253-9911.

THURSDAY 15 & FRIDAY 16

drama â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;THE ONCE & FUTURE UBUâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 14. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;GUYS & DOLLSâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 14, 2 & 7:30 p.m. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;NIGHT FIRESâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 14, Holley Hall, Bristol, 5 & 8 p.m. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;DICKENS BY CANDLELIGHTâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 15, $20. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;THE CHRISTMAS REVELSâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 15, 2 & 7:30 p.m., $10-20. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;NEVER BEFORE SEENâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 15, 2 & 7:30 p.m., $3-10. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;AN O. HENRY CHRISTMASâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 16. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;A CHRISTMAS STORYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: Professor Ria Blass and copuppeteer Suzanne Lupien offer a marionette version of the Bethlehem boarding of Jesus, Mary and Joseph. Main Street Museum, White River Junction, 7 p.m. $7. Info, 356-2776.

MOZART MOJO

Classical compositions go in and out of style, but Mozart is always in season. Although he only lived to 35, the prolific Austrianâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s compositions are widely acknowledged as the pinnacles of symphonic, chamber, operatic, choral and piano music. The 250th anniversary of the geniusâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; geburtstag falls in 2006, and the Vermont Mozart Festival plans a special summer season, as well as an offering on January 27th, the big day. But anyone jonesing for a pre-holiday preview can take in an all-Mozart Christmas marathon this weekend. William Metcalfe conducts the festival orchestra and the Oriana Singers in the â&#x20AC;&#x153;Great Mass in C-Minor,â&#x20AC;? Symphony No. 28, and a selection of motets and carols.

art Also, see exhibitions in Section A. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;FESTIVAL OF TREES & LIGHTâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 14.

VERMONT MOZART FESTIVAL Thursday, December 15, Unitarian Church, Burlington, 8 p.m. $25. Friday, December 16, Community Church, Stowe, 7:30 p.m. $30 includes post-concert reception. Info, 862-7352. http://www.vtmozart.com http://www.mozart2006.net

talks INTRO TO REIKI: Massage therapist Juliann Ashton discusses this healing disciplineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s history, then runs through a sample session. Moonlight Gifts, Milton, 10 a.m. - noon. Free. Info, 893-9966.

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ANIMAL FEEDING: See December 14.

SANTA CLAUS: See December 16, 10 a.m. - noon & 2-4 p.m. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;SATURDAY STORIESâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: Librarians read from popular picture books at the Burnham Memorial Library, Colchester, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 878-0313.

BORDERS STORYTIME: Little bookworms listen to stories at Borders, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 865-2711.

CHILDRENâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S STORYTIME: Youngsters take in their favorite tales at the Book Rack & Childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pages, Essex, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 872-2627.

BARNES & NOBLE STORYTIME: Kids ages 4 and up settle down for stories at Barnes & Noble, South Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 864-8001. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;READ TO CLYDEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: Canine-loving kids in grades K-5 gain confidence by voicing stories to a therapy dog. Brownell Library, Essex Junction, 10 a.m.

Free. Registration and info, 878-6956.

SOLSTICE CRAFTS: Ages 6 and up celebrate light by transforming transparent jam jars from home into colorful stained-glass candleholders. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10 a.m. - noon. Free. Info, 865-7216.

HORSE & BUGGY RIDES: Pint-sized equestrians get a leg up at the top of Church Street, Burlington, 11 a.m. - 3 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7253.

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;RAPTOR RESCUEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 14. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;RAPTORS UP CLOSEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 14.

CHARITY BINGO: See December 14.

GINGERBREAD HOUSE EXHIBIT: See December 14. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;TREES FOR TEENSâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 14, noon - 4 p.m.

GIANT HOLIDAY BOOK SALE: See December 14, 10 a.m. - 5:30 p.m.

INTERNATIONAL BOUTIQUE: See December 14, 10 a.m. - 8 p.m.

GIFT WRAP DEPOT: See December 15, noon - 5 p.m. Also at Minuteman Press, Montpelier, 10 a.m. - 2 p.m. Donations. Info, 229-9604.

WAGON RIDES: See December 16, 1-3:30 p.m. Also departing from Montpelier City Hall, noon - 3 p.m. Free. Info, 229-9604. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;NATURALISTâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S CHOICEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: An on-site outdoor guide talks about the environmental niche of coyotes, bats, bears, loons, turkeys and moose. VINS Nature Center, Quechee, 12:30 p.m. $8. Info, 3595000.

CANDY-CANE-MAKING DEMO: Confectioners pull, roll and twist striped seasonal sweets to show visitors how itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s done. Laughing Moon Chocolates, Stowe, 2 p.m. Free. Info, 253-9591. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;CHRISTMAS AT THE FARMâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: Visitors experience a 19th-century holiday and help make sweet treats in a woodstove-centered kitchen. Billings Farm & Museum, Woodstock, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. $9.50.

Info, 457-2355.

CIRCUS ARTS DEMO: Big-top pro coaches showcase local performersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; skills, then offer info on flyingtrapeze lessons. Champlain Valley Exposition, Essex Junction, 1-4 p.m. Free. Info, 879-1139.

sport CAMELâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S HUMP HIKE: The Monroe Trail leads to the Long Trail and the summit on this 7-mile, snowshoe ascent. Call for meeting location and time. Free. Info, 238-7866.

RUNNING TOY DRIVE: The Capital City Hash House Harriers dart around town after donating playthings for local kidsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Christmas mornings. Starts at McGillicuddyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, Montpelier, 2 p.m. $5 and one unwrapped toy. Info, 244-5958.

SUN.18 music Also, see clubdates in Section A. COUNTERPOINT SINGS NOEL: See December 16, Unitarian Church, Burlington, 4 p.m. $15. Info, 863-5966.

VERMONT GAY MENâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S CHORUS: See December 16, College Street Congregational Church, Burlington, 4 p.m. This concert raises funds for Outright Vermont.

CAMBRIDGE CLASSIC CHORALE: See December 16, 2:30 p.m.

ONION RIVER CHORUS: See December 17, Unitarian Church, Montpelier, 4 p.m.

KIRTAN SINGING: Yoga students stretch vocal cords with chants in Sanskrit. Yoga Vermont, Burlington, 6-8 p.m. Free. Info, 598-7711.

FULL CIRCLE: Five female friends perform medieval and Renaissance dances and love songs on period instruments â&#x20AC;&#x201D; including a set of goat toenails.

Jericho Congregational Church, 7 p.m. $5. Info, 899-5433. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;THE WONDER OF CHRISTMASâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: A 40-member choir lifts spirits with holiday selections. Hand bells augment the evening offering at the North Avenue Alliance Church, Burlington, 10:30 a.m. & 6 p.m. Free. Info, 864-0501.

CHRISTMAS CONCERT: The Milton Community Band follows classical pop variations with caroling.

Milton High School Auditorium, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 893-1398.

dance â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;BLESSED: A HIP-HOP DANCE LIFEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 17, 5 p.m.

CHRISTMAS CEILIDH: Irish step dancers show their stuff, then encourage audience participation.

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â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;SEPARATE LIESâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 16.

WALLACE & GROMIT MARATHON: The goofily inept inventor and his silent genius of a dog star in the three animated classic shorts â&#x20AC;&#x153;A Grand Day Out,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Wrong Trousersâ&#x20AC;? and â&#x20AC;&#x153;A Close Shave.â&#x20AC;? Savoy Theater, Montpelier, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 229-9604.

art Also, see exhibitions in Section A. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;FESTIVAL OF TREES & LIGHTâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 14.

kids ANIMAL FEEDING: See December 14.

CHILDRENâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S DAY: Kids up to age 14 create crafts and see a special play, followed by board games, sledding, skating and storytelling. Karme Choling Shambhala Buddhist Meditation Center, Barnet, 9 a.m. $10 and an unwrapped toy for donation.

Info, 633-2384.

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â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;GUYS & DOLLSâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 14, 2 & 7:30 p.m. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;NIGHT FIRESâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 14, Holley Hall, Bristol, 5 p.m. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;DICKENS BY CANDLELIGHTâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 15, 5 p.m. $20. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;THE CHRISTMAS REVELSâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 15, 2 & 7 p.m. $10-20. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;AN O. HENRY CHRISTMASâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 16, 2 p.m. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;A CHRISTMAS STORYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;: See December 17, 4 p.m.

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time and location. Free, bring food, hot drinks and inspiring words to share. Info, 899-2375.

FOUR SQUARE GAME: Adult athletes try to bounce balls through each other’s territory in this playful redux of a schoolyard recess pastime. Champlain Elementary School, Burlington, 2-4 p.m. $6. Info, 508-942-2403.

SAMBATUCADA! REHEARSAL: Percussive people pound out carnival rhythms at an open meeting of this Brazilian-style community drumming troupe. Switchback Brewery, Burlington, 6 p.m.

Free. Info, 863-0532.

etc

HIP-HOP & JAZZ PERFORMANCE: FlynnArts class members make like music-video dance mavens on the Flynn MainStage, Burlington, 6:30 p.m. Free.

Info, 863-5966.

‘RAPTOR RESCUE’: See December 14.

‘RAPTORS UP CLOSE’: See December 14.

CHARITY BINGO: See December 14, 2 & 7 p.m.

GINGERBREAD HOUSE EXHIBIT: See December 14.

GIFT WRAP DEPOT: See December 15, noon - 5 p.m. Also at Minuteman Press, Montpelier, 10 a.m. - 2 p.m. Donations. Info, 229-9604.

WAGON RIDES: See December 16, different location. Departs from Montpelier City Hall, noon - 3 p.m. Free. Info, 229-9604.

‘NATURALIST’S CHOICE’: See December 17.

CANDY-CANE-MAKING DEMO: See December 17.

‘CHRISTMAS AT THE FARM’: See December 17.

CHRISTMAS CALLS: Senior citizen guests can phone loved ones anywhere in the world for up to one hour, courtesy of Merrill Lynch, 199 Main Street, Burlington, 9 a.m. - 2 p.m. Free.

Reservations and info, 660-1029.

HANUKKAH PARTY: Music, stories, games, crafts and prizes celebrate community fellowship. Fresh potato latkes and applesauce highlight a buffet of homemade dishes at Ohavi Zedek Synagogue, Burlington, 11:30 a.m. - 1:30 p.m. $5. Info, 864-0218.

MON.19

dance

film ‘SEPARATE LIES’: See December 16.

UNSEEN CINEMA: Film enthusiasts won’t want to miss this program of experimental American arthouse shorts from 1894 to 1941. Howe Library, Hanover, N.H. 7 p.m. Free. Info, 603-643-4120.

art Also, see exhibitions in Section A. COMMUNITY DARKROOM: See December 15.

LIFE DRAWING SESSION: Creative types try a hand at sketching. Wolfe Kahn Building, Vermont Studio Center, Johnson, 6-8 p.m. $7. Info, 635-1769.

words WRITING FOR KIDS: Budding children’s authors share ideas with other supportive scribes. South Burlington Community Library, 7 p.m. Free.

Registration and info, 652-7080.

SPIRITUAL BOOK DISCUSSION: Readers of Harold Klemp’s Past Lives, Dreams, and Soul Travel discuss the author’s religious movement as it relates to his work. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 863-3364.

music Also, see clubdates in Section A. 2x3-soundsource120705

12/5/05

SAT.17 & SUN.18 & WED.28 - FRI.30

4:44 PM

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HIP-HOP HOORAY

Vermont doesn’t usually top the list of urban-style dance hotspots, but that doesn’t mean you can’t get there from here. Montpelier-based choreographer Sarah Cover grew up in central Vermont, studying at the Contemporary Dance and Fitness Studio. Stints in New York and L.A. brought her gigs on music videos and live shows with big-name playas in both rap and hiphop. She’s since taught at both CD&FS and the Flynn. Accompanied by DJ Zach Johnson, 18 of Cover’s students showcase their mad skillz at two separate venues, in a stage show titled Blessed. The word fits how the dancers, who range in age from 12 to 35, feel about hip-hop moves. It also articulates Cover’s gratitude for teaching. Book tickets soon — the Flynn shows are already sold out.

‘BLESSED: A HIP-HOP DANCE LIFE’ Saturday & Sunday, December

17 & 18, FlynnSpace, Burlington, various times. $12. Info, 863-5966. Wednesday, Thursday & Friday, December 28-30, Club Metronome, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. $11.

Info, 863-5966.

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PREVIEW: Friday December 16 from 2:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m. by appointment & morning of sale 8:00 a.m. to start of auction.This sale features the contents of a mid 19th century Greensboro Vermont farm house. Toys and collectibles from a Barre Vermont estate. Silver, china & formal furniture from a Burlington Hill section home and additions from other local estates and collections.

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12/12/05

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11:46 AM

Page 1

865-9628

76 Ethan Allen Drive South Burlington

22B

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december 14-21, 2005

|

SEVEN DAYS

<calendar >

MON.19 << 21B

talks PHILOSOPHY CHAT: CCV prof Susan Loynd shines light on Plato’s Allegory of the Cave in an overview for laypeople. Kellogg-Hubbard Library, Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 2233338.

CANADIAN ELDERHOSTELS: Traveler Marion Schneider talks about her experience as a senior in Québec’s Eastern Townships. Dorothy Alling Memorial Library, Williston, 1 p.m. Free.

Info, 878-4918.

kids ANIMAL FEEDING: See December 14.

FAMILY SING-ALONG: Parents and kids belt out fun, familiar favorites at the Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10-10:30 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. Also at the Pierson Library, Shelburne, 10:30 a.m. Free. Info, 985-5124.

BUBBIES, BABIES & BAGELS: A Jewish-themed playgroup for families of all backgrounds features intergenerational schmoozing and noshing. Ohavi Zedek Synagogue, Burlington, 10-11 a.m. Free. Info, 864-0218, ext. 26.

sport

PUBLIC FLU SHOT CLINIC: Adults over age 18 queue for vaccinations at the Tarrant Student Recreation Center, St. Michael’s College, Colchester, 9 a.m. - 5 p.m. Donations. Info, 658-1900.

TUE.20

dance LINE DANCING: Show off your fancy footwork at the Harvest Moon Banquet Room, Essex Junction, 6-9:30 p.m. $8.50. Info, 288-8044.

SWING DANCING: Quick-footed folks learn and practice hep-cat rock steps at the Champlain Club, Burlington, 7:30-9:30 p.m. $3. Info, 860-7501.

WED.21 music Also, see clubdates in Section A. ST. ANDREWS PIPES & DRUMS: See December 14.

dance

sport

‘GUYS & DOLLS’: See December 14, 2 & 7:30 p.m.

‘SALSALINA’ PRACTICE: See December 14.

COMMUNITY YOGA CLASS: Beginner to intermediate stretchers strike a pose for spine alignment with Anusara-inspired instruction. Healing in Common Lobby, Network Chiropractic of Vermont, South Burlington, 5:30-6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 660-9036.

BURLINGTON PEACE VIGIL: See December 14.

film ‘SEPARATE LIES’: See December 16.

CHOCOLATE-DIPPING DEMO: See December 14.

GINGERBREAD HOUSE EXHIBIT: See December 14.

GIANT HOLIDAY BOOK SALE: See December 14.

GIFT WRAP DEPOT: See December 15, noon - 8 p.m.

CHOCOLATE-DIPPING DEMO: See December 14.

CHARITY BINGO: See December 14.

GINGERBREAD HOUSE EXHIBIT: See December 14.

GIANT HOLIDAY BOOK SALE: See December 14.

GIFT WRAP DEPOT: See December 15, noon - 8 p.m.

PAUSE CAFÉ: Novice and fluent French speakers brush up on their linguistics — en français. Borders Café, Burlington, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 655-1346.

MOTHERS OF PRESCHOOLERS: Women with small kids convene for child-free conversation and crafts. Green Mountain Community Alliance Church, Waterbury, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 244-6463.

BLOOD DRIVE MARATHON: Donors prick up their courage to fill a critical need, then select special treats. Paramount Theatre, Rutland, 11:30 a.m. - 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 747-5427.

ANIMAL FEEDING: See December 14.

BROWNELL LIBRARY STORYTIME: See December 14. Toddlers take their turns with tales first, 9:10-9:30 a.m.

SOUTH BURLINGTON LIBRARY STORYTIME: See December 15, for babies and toddlers up to age 3.

‘MUSIC WITH ROBERT AND GIGI’: See December 16.

TODDLER-AND-UNDER STORYTIME: Wee ones up to age 3 open their ears to songs and stories.

South Burlington Community Library, 10 a.m.

Free. Info, 652-7080.

ECHO STORYTIME: Young explorers discover the wonders of the natural world through books and imaginative play. ECHO Center, Burlington, 11 a.m. $6-9. Info, 864-1848.

HOLIDAY STORIES: Is that a mouse stirring?

Preschoolers hear seasonal classics at the Burnham Library, Colchester, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 878-0313.

Also, see clubdates in Section A. GREEN MOUNTAIN CHORUS: Male music-makers rehearse barbershop singing and quartetting at St. Francis Xavier School, Winooski, 7-9:30 p.m.

Free. Info, 655-2949.

NORTH WIND QUINTET: Expect Christmas classics from this group of five area musicians. Book King, Rutland, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 773-9232.

drama

etc

etc

BURLINGTON WRITERS’ GROUP: Bring pencil, paper and the will to be inspired to the Daily Planet, Burlington, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 758-2287.

POETRY NIGHT: Vermont versifiers Rita Shell Delphia and Ron Lewis read their work aloud at Book King, Rutland, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 773-9232.

kids

music

SENIOR EXERCISE: See December 14, 10 a.m.

activism

words

art

drama ‘GUYS & DOLLS’: See December 14.

‘DICKENS BY CANDLELIGHT’: See December 15, $20.

film

activism

Also, see exhibitions in Section A. ‘FESTIVAL OF TREES & LIGHT’: See December 14.

BURLINGTON PEACE VIGIL: See December 14.

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GIJHL

‘SEPARATE LIES’: See December 16.

2:52 PM

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SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | calendar 23B

WED 14 THU 15 FRI 16 SAT 17 SUN 18 MON 19 TUE 20 WED 21

art

sport

Also, see exhibitions in Section A. ‘FESTIVAL OF TREES & LIGHT’: See December 14.

‘ANATOMY OF AN ACCIDENT’: This slide show documents one of the worst tragedies in Vermont history — a 1935 Christmas night fire at a Waterbury camp. Vermont Ski Museum, Stowe, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 253-9911.

SENIOR EXERCISE: See December 14.

words POETRY OPEN MIKE: See December 14.

talks SPORTS INJURIES: Physical therapist Sharon Gutwin explains how to handle ski and snowboarding hurts. Smugglers’ Notch Lounge, 2 p.m.

Free. Info, 644-1293.

kids ANIMAL FEEDING: See December 14.

BARNES & NOBLE STORYTIME: See December 14.

WESTFORD PLAYGROUP: See December 14.

PRESCHOOL STORYTIME: See December 14.

BROWNELL LIBRARY STORYTIME: See December 14.

HINESBURG PLAY GROUP: See December 14.

PAJAMA STORYTIME: Little ones ages 3 and up get ready for bed with not-too-scary nighttime tales. Burnham Memorial Library, Colchester, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 878-0313.

WINTER REFLECTIONS: Small fry express wishes for a healthy environment with seasonal projects. ECHO Center, Burlington, 11 a.m. - 3 p.m. $6-9. Info, 864-1848.

2x4-Scribbles111605

11/14/05

1:11 PM

SATURDAY 17

activism BURLINGTON PEACE VIGIL: See December 14.

INTERNATIONAL SOCIALISTS: See December 14.

MERGER TASK FORCE: See December 14, Town Office Meeting Room, Essex.

COTS CANDLELIGHT VIGIL: Citizens join in solidarity with neighbors facing the crisis of homelessness during the holidays. In front of Burlington City Hall, 4:30 p.m. Free. Info, 8647402.

etc ‘RAPTOR RESCUE’: See December 14.

‘RAPTORS UP CLOSE’: See December 14.

CHOCOLATE-DIPPING DEMO: See December 14.

ESL GROUP: See December 14.

CHESS GROUP: See December 14.

KNITTING POSSE: See December 14.

HEALTH WORKSHOP: See December 14.

VETERANS JOB NETWORKING: See December 14.

CHARITY BINGO: See December 14.

GIANT HOLIDAY BOOK SALE: See December 14.

CABLE-ACCESS LAB: See December 14.

GIFT WRAP DEPOT: See December 15, noon - 8 p.m.

ENGLISH CONVERSATION: Students learning English as a second language chat informally to improve their speaking skills. South Burlington Community Library, 1 p.m. Free. Registration and info, 652-7080.

WINTER SOLSTICE CELEBRATION: Contemplative strollers make their way through a labyrinth.

Later, an illustrated talk illuminates the play of light on ancient sites in Ireland, New Mexico and Vermont. All Saints Episcopal Church, South Burlington, walk 1:35 p.m., talk 5:30 p.m. Free.

Info,1878-9137. m Page

FIDDLE HEADS

Scott Campbell started fiddling around when he was 10, and learned tunes quickly enough at his dad’s knee that by age 14, he had performed in Nashville alongside legendary banjo man Earl Scruggs. The Vermont virtuoso later picked up guitar and piano to gig out with a rock and country band. He now composes custom tunes, hosts fiddlers’ workshops and presides over the North American Fiddling Judges Association. Campbell headlines with the Vermont Fiddle Orchestra, which combines classical string players with beginner- and intermediatelevel folk fiddlers seeking to hone performance skills. Montpelier’s marsupially inspired State Street Possum Stompers Jug Band joins in.

VERMONT FIDDLE ORCHESTRA Saturday, December 17, Chandler Center for the Arts, Randolph, 7 p.m. $8. Info, 223-8945. http://www.woodburystrings.home.att.net/vfo.htm 2x4-BCAFirehouse113005 11/25/05 9:07 AM http://www.scottytunes.com

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Do you have an RV, camper, large van or minibus to donate? (tax write-off possible) Convoy Departs in January!

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Page 1

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24B

|

december 14-21, 2005

|

SEVEN DAYS

free will astrology

L RE A

DECEMBER 15-21

ARIES (March 21-April 19): It’s possible

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Cancerian

there’s still enough oil buried in the earth to sustain our civilization’s exorbitant appetite for material comforts for another 100 years. Or it may be true, as some researchers suggest, that global reserves of black gold are rapidly dwindling, and 20 years from now we’ll all be farmers and hunters sitting around campfires at night telling stories. Whichever scenario comes to pass, Aries, you’ll be happiest and smartest and healthiest if you cultivate a simple and earthy relationship with luxury — maybe something akin to poet Omar Khayyam’s notion, which was “a jug of wine, a loaf of bread, and thou beside me singing in the wilderness.” The coming week is a perfect time for you to practice this approach.

hero Nelson Mandela spent 27 years in a South African jail as a political prisoner. Once he was released, he became his country’s first democratically elected president, helped abolish its system of apartheid, and won the Nobel Peace Prize.

You, my friend, are at a point comparable to the one Mandela was at right before he was freed.

Although your confinement hasn’t been nearly as dire or as long as his, your release will be pretty glorious. I hope that in the ensuing weeks you will demonstrate at least a fraction of his ability to triumph over the adversity you’ve had to endure.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Your selfimage is too small, in my opinion. You’ve crammed your identity into a few pigeonholes, and it’s dying to escape. To launch you on the path to expansion, let’s stimulate your imagination with some exercises. Start by visualizing yourself as being the opposite gender. What would your name be? Now picture yourself as being a different race and having an alternate ethnic background. How would that affect your philosophy of life? Imagine yourself working at a job or career other than the one you actually have, and living in a different city, and making $20,000 more a year than you actually do. Now dream up some more fantasies about other selves who might be lurking within you.

GEMINI

(May 21-June 20): I’ve lived in the same house for 10 years, but it was only yesterday I noticed that the top of my kitchen sink had a word engraved on it: Lustertone. The discovery was embarrassing, since it revealed how unperceptive I can be. But it was also a sign that maybe I’m waking up from my everyday trance and ready to register details that have been invisible to me before. I believe that a similar development is imminent in your life, Gemini. You’re primed to start gathering in the open secrets that have been hidden in plain view. Here’s your word of power: lustertone.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Kiss the back of your hand and remember a moment in childhood when you felt the perfect joy of being at home in the world. Give a gift to a river, lake or ocean.

Treasure the unique shape and contours of your beautiful face. For just 48 hours, be inflamed with the hypothesis that your soul will live forever. Imagine that your place of power is where the tree joins the earth. Playfully lower your expectations all the way down to the bottom, and tune in to the shattering sweetness of life exactly as it is. Put yourself under the protection of the raw elements. Write an epic three-page autobiography while sitting in the pitch dark. Seize the power to create magic that has always seemed impossible before.

VIRGO

(Aug. 23-Sept. 22): A while back you heard a commotion coming from behind the door of opportunity. It momentarily buoyed you.

But the silence since then has been disheartening.

Now you may even be on the verge of giving up.

But here’s my advice to you: Start knocking on that door and don’t stop until it opens. Keep knocking patiently and politely for an hour, for a day, for three weeks or six months — for as long as it takes. I don’t know if the answer you’ll receive when the door opens will be exactly the one you want, but it will provide you with the precise information you need to decide what to do next. And you’ll never get that insight if you walk away now.

BY ROB BREZSNY You can call Rob Brezsny, day or night, for your expanded weekly horoscope 1-900-950-7700. $1.99 per minute. 18 and over. Touchtone phone.

LIBRA

(Sept. 23-Oct. 22): When T.S. Eliot wrote the first draft of his famous poem “The Waste Land,” it was about a thousand lines long. Wondering if maybe it was too sprawling, he asked another poet, Ezra Pound, to edit it.

Pound crossed out more than half of the original, and Eliot published it in that slimmed-down form. I encourage you to locate your own personal equivalent of Ezra Pound right now, Libra.

You need help in extracting your future masterpiece from the dross in which it’s still half-buried.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): This is prime time for you to burn away delusions that cripple your ability to act with maximum freedom. There are two particular misconceptions that you have special power to eradicate. The first is the belief that you can help someone else by diminishing yourself. The second is the notion that you can somehow benefit from the losses of other people. The truth in both cases is exactly the opposite: If you really want to contribute to anyone’s well being, you have to do it in such a way that you, too, thrive. And vice versa.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Greenland is literally covered with rubies.

“You can’t set foot anywhere without stepping on five or six rubies,” says gemstone hunter Andrew Lee Smith, quoted in Discover magazine. This omnipresence of valuable beauty is an apt metaphor for your fate in the coming week, Sagittarius. Everywhere you turn, you will see treasure. You may find the abundance hard to believe. Ironically, your incredulity is the only possible obstacle that could interfere with you gathering up and enjoying the riches.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): The British edition of Cosmopolitan still provides women with practical, no-nonsense advice like “How to love yourself after a pig-out” and “8 sizzling sex lessons your man needs to learn,” but it has also added a spirituality column. “I’ve come to the painful realization that men and shoes are not enough to make me happy,” wrote Hannah

Borno, introducing the new section. “The key to true contentment lies elsewhere.” Cosmo readers now get helpful tips on consulting their guardian angels, tapping into the wisdom of dreams, and trying out various meditation techniques. If this renowned hotbed of the sensual approach to life has finally acknowledged the subtler dimensions, maybe you Capricorns, traditionally the hardcore materialists of the zodiac, might also be inspired to expand your spiritual perspective. I hope so. It’s a perfect moment for you to get delightfully zapped with a sacred epiphany.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): A friend gave me a live rosebush in a planter for my birthday last June. After a few weeks, its five red flowers withered and turned brown but didn’t fall off their stems. I left them there, perversely fascinated by the dead blooms that wouldn’t let go.

Months later, in late November, five new flowers blossomed, and now the bush displays a mix of the living and the dead. It sort of reminds me of you, Aquarius. But I suggest that you do what I haven’t done yet: Start plucking off the dried-up old parts of your life today. Give the fresh parts more room to grow and shine.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible,” wrote French philosopher Voltaire. I hope you will contradict him, Pisces, both in the coming weeks and throughout 2006. To be in alignment with the most exalted astrological possibilities, you should be the snowflake that at least tries to question the avalanche, and even makes an effort to stop it or reroute it. Maybe you don’t realize how much power your seemingly little crystalline self has to change history, but I’m here to tell you it’s more than you imagine.

Peace and Joy for the Holidays from the gang at

SEVEN DAYS

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

7Dcrossword

last week’s answers on page 37B

SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | help yourself 25B

<helpyourself> CLASSES AND WELLNESS

sevendaysvt.com/helpyourself

<inprofile>

meditation <<

:: CLASSES $15/week or $50/4 weeks for 50 words.

(Subject to editing for space and style.)

:: WELLNESS $ 15/week for 25 words.

Over 25 words: 50¢/word.

:: PLACE AN AD www.sevendaysvt.com/helpyourself helpyourself@sevendaysvt.com

:: DEADLINES All listings must be reserved and paid for by Thursday at 5 p.m.

SHAMBHALA BUDDHIST MEDITATION: Open to the public, Mondays through Thursdays, 6-7 p.m. and Sundays, 9 a.m. - noon. The Burlington Shambhala Center, 187 South Winooski, corner of King St. Free. Info, 802-658-6795 or visit www.burlingtonshambhalactr.org.

The Burlington Shambhala Center offers meditation as a path to discovering gentleness and wisdom. The Shambhala Cafe meets the first Saturday morning of each month, January 7, for meditation and discussions, 9-11:30 a.m.

PHOTO: MATTHEW THORSEN

26B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS 1x4-thewell112305

12/13/05

1x2-kelman 9:24 AM Page 18/3/05

3:24 PM

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<helpyourself> //classes acting ACTING FOR FILM: Presented by Jock MacDonald in conjunction with 12:49 PM Page 1 Cameron Thor Studios. Classes Mondays in Waterbury, Wednesdays in Montréal and Thursdays in Toronto. Boston class now forming. Info, 318-8555, http://www.thoreast.com or http:// www.cameronthor.com. Vermont native actor and acting coach Jock MacDonald has acted professionally for over 25 years and has taught professionally for over 10 years. Cameron Thor Studios is regarded as one of the best film acting studios in the world. It has helped start the careers of some of the industry’s biggest stars. Cameron Thor Studios clients include: Faye Dunaway, Sharon Stone, Hank Azaria, Courteney Cox, David Arquette, Drew Carey, Cameron Diaz and many more.

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Healing for body, mind and spirit.

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WOMEN VOLUNTEERS WANTED FOR RESEARCH at UVM

WE ARE RECRUITING:

Department of Ob/Gyn, Ira Bernstein MD

• Women interested in becoming pregnant for the first time during the next year and who have never been pregnant.

This study will examine risk factors for Preeclampsia, a disease of pregnancy.

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Healthy and 18-40 years of age Have regular menstrual cycles Are not using hormonal contraception And do not smoke

Compensation is provided between $400.00 and $800.00.

If you are interested, please call 656-2669 for more information.

ART CAMP: Saturday, December 10 and 17, 10 a.m. - 2:30 p.m. $35 per kid/session. Info, gillianklein@ mac.com or 999-8303. Art camp for school-aged kids to make holiday gifts to be cherished for years to come.

Kids make multiple projects to give for the holidays, parents get some time, too. Supervised by art and education professionals in a safe and creative environment.

HOLIDAY WONDERLAND WORKSHOP: Saturday, December 10 or December 17, 10 a.m.- 3 p.m., wingspan Painting Studio. $60, lunch provided. Info, 802233-7676 or email maggiestandley@ yahoo.com. Will do several creativity strengthening exercises together. On your own you’ll have the chance to create handmade cards, wrapping paper, ornaments or original works of art. Come spend a fun and relaxing afternoon in Maggie Standley’s studio and add a special touch to your holidays.

p.m., Level 2: 7-9 p.m. Petra Cliffs Climbing Center. $150. Info, www.petra cliffs.com or call 802-657-3872. Level I: Basics of climbing; Level II: Improving intermediate skills/lead climbing.

ICE CLIMBING I AND II: Level 1, December 17, 9 a.m. - 4 p.m. $119. Level 2, December 18, 9 a.m. - 4 p.m. Petra Cliffs Mountaineering School. $169.

Info, 802-657-3872 or visit www.petracliffs.com. Learn about the exhilarating sport of ice climbing! Level 1, beginner climbing, no experience necessary. Level 2, previous experience required. Improve intermediate ice skills.

INTRO TO MOUNTAINEERING: January 14, 9 a.m. - 4 p.m. Petra Cliffs Mountaineering School. $119, all technical equipment included. Info, visit www. petracliffs.com or call 802-657-3872.

Learn the fundamentals of safe winter travel over snow and ice! Components of instruction include use of crampons and ice axe, rope management skills, glissading and self-arrest techniques.

JUNIOR CLIMBING TEAM: Monday and Wednesday evenings, beginning January 18 through May, with 7 weekend comps throughout New England.

Two sessions, January - March, MarchMay. Petra Cliffs Climbing Center. $375 each. Info, 802-657-3872. Ages 10–17.

Have an enthusiasm for climbing? Sign up now or any time during the season!

TWO DAY AIARE AVALANCHE LEVEL I CERTIFICATION: January 28-29, 9 a.m. - 4 p.m. Petra Cliffs Mountaineering School/Chauvin Guides. $200, includes all technical equipment. Info, visit www.petracliffs.com or call 802657-3872. A must for skiers, snowboarders, climbers & backcountry enthusiasts.

Learn basics of avoiding avalanches including route selection, evaluating avalanche potential and rescue procedures. Includes Level I Certification.

WOMEN’S 1 & 2 INDOOR CLIMBING CLINICS: Six-week clinics, Thursday, January 12 - February 16. Level 1: 6-8 p.m., Level 2: 7-9 p.m. Petra Cliffs Climbing Center. $150. Info, www. petracliffs.com or call 802-657-3872.

Taught by women! Level I: Basics of climbing; Level II: Improving intermediate skills/lead climbing.

business BUILDING YOUR TEAM: HOW TO HIRE AND RETAIN GOOD STAFF: Saturday, January 21, 9 a.m. - 4 p.m.

Women’s Small Business Program or Mercy Connections. $105. Info, 802846-7338. This daylong workshop will help you learn how to resolve conflicts and encourage better work from your employees.

START UP: Thursday evenings and every other Sunday, February 2 - May 21. Women’s Small Business Program. $1295. Info, 802-846-7338 or visit http://www.mercyconnections.org.

Learn valuable business skills as you write a bank ready business plan. Call now for an application and interview times.

climbing CO-ED 1 & 2 INDOOR CLIMBING CLINICS: Six-week clinics, Tuesdays, January 10-February 14. Level 1: 6-8

dreams JUNGIAN DREAMWORK FOR WOMEN: Ongoing program, Tuesdays, 7-9 p.m. 35 King Street, Burlington. $10/session. Info, call Judi, 802865-2444 or Sue, 802-244-7909.

For women interested in learning dreamwork techniques, deepening their connections to their inner life, and empowering themselves in a safe, supportive setting. Led by Dr. Sue Mehrtens, teacher and author, with over 30 years of experience in Jungian analysis, dreamwork and leading adult programs.

drumming

bartending PROFESSIONAL TRAINING: Day, evening and weekend courses. Various locations. Info, 888-4DRINKS or bartendingschool.com. Get certified to make a mean martini, margarita, Manhattan or mai tai.

BALLROOM DANCE CLASSES WITH FIRST STEP DANCE: Tuesday evenings, Saint Albans, Thursday evenings, Burlington. $40. Info, 802-5986757, email Kevin@FirstStepDance. com or visit www.FirstStepDance.com.

Classes begin the first week of each month and run for four weeks. No partner required for classes, so come alone, or come with friends, but come out and learn to dance. We also offer beginning lessons before our monthly dances in both Burlington and St. Albans!

DANCE CLASSES AT CCV: Most classes start the week of January 23 at CCV Burlington, 119 Pearl Street.

Info, 802-865-4422 or visit www.ccv. edu. Register on the web now through January 13. Walk-in registration begins January 2. Classes include Fundamentals of Jazz Dance, and Body Awareness. Instructors, Karen Amirault and Annelies Smith.

FLYNNARTS SPRING DANCE CLASSES FOR CHILDREN, TEENS AND ADULTS: Beginning January 16. Register early and earn a free ticket to a Flynn show.

Info, call 802-652-4548, email flynn arts@flynncenter.org, or visit www. flynncenter.org. Moving Pictures, ages 3-4, Creative Movement, grades K-1, Get Moving!, grades 2-3, and Moving On!, grades 4-6, Junior Hip-Hop, grades 6-8, Hip-Hop I, II, & III, Jazz I, Jazz II: Cabaret Style, Jazz II: Funk Style, Ballet I & II , teens and adults, and Modern Technique and Lunchtime Dance and Fitness Fusion, adult.

dance AFRO-CARIBBEAN DANCE WITH REYNALDO GONZALEZ FROM MATANZAS, CUBA: Thursday, December 15, 10:30 a.m. - 12:30, Capitol City Grange, Montpelier. Friday, December 16, 5:30-7:30 p.m. Memorial Auditorium Loft, Burlington. Info, 985-3665 or 660-4056. Reynaldo Gonzalez is an experienced teacher of AfroCuban folkloric song, dance and percussion. He was a member of one of Cuba’s most acclaimed folkloric groups, AfroCuba de Matanzas. The traditional song, dance and music he teaches is part of Cuba’s rich cultural heritage which still flourishes there today.

BALLET AT THE SHELBURNE ATHLETIC CLUB: Parent and tot dance, ages 2-3 w/caregiver, Mondays, 2-2:30, and Sundays, 11-11:30 a.m. Creative pre-ballet, ages 4-6, Mondays, 2:453:30 p.m., and Wednesdays, 1:15-2 p.m. Children’s Ballet, ages 6-10, Mondays, 3:30-4:30 p.m. Adult ballet, beginner, Wednesdays, 12-1 p.m. Info, call Annette at 802-860-9927 or visit www.shelburneathletic.com. Experience quality classical ballet instruction in a supportive, fun environment.

BURLINGTON TAIKO CLASSES: Parade workshops, Mondays, December 12 and 19, 5:30-7 p.m. Free. Kids’ Beginning Class, Tuesdays, 4:30-5:20 p.m. Four-week session beginning November 29. $28. Seven-week session beginning January 10. $49. Kids’ Advanced Beginners Class, Mondays, 3:15-4 p.m. Seven-week session beginning January 19. $49. Adult Beginning Class, Tuesdays, 5:30-6:20 p.m.

Two-week session beginning November 29. $16. Seven-week session beginning January 10. $56. Adult Advanced Beginners Class, Mondays, 5:30-7 p.m. Seven-week session beginning January 9. $56. Adult Intermediate Class, Mondays, 7-8:20 p.m. Two-week session beginning December 12. $16.

Seven-week session beginning January 9. $56. Info, 658-0658 or email classes@burlingtontaiko.org. Walk-ins are welcome. Gift certificates available.

CONGAS AND DJEMBES: Beginning Conga Classes, Wednesdays, beginning November 9, 5:30-6:50 p.m. $12 per class. Beginning Djembe Classes, Wednesdays, beginning November 9, 7-8:20 p.m. $12 per class. Info, Stuart Paton, 658-0658 classes@burlingtontaiko.org. Walk-ins are welcome.

Gift certificates are available..

RICHMOND TAIKO CLASSES: Parade classes, Thursdays, 6-6:50 p.m. Threeweek sessions, beginning December 1. Beginners, Thursdays, 7-8:50 p.m. Three-week session beginning December 1. Info, 802-658-0658 or email classes@burlingtontaiko.org.

December 1 class will be held at the Richmond Congregational Church, December 8 and 15 classes will be held at the Richmond Library. Pre-registration is required and there is a 10-person minimum for each class.

SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | help yourself 27B CLASSES WELLNESS PLACE AN AD DEADLINES

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$15/week or $50/4 weeks for 50 words. (Subject to editing for space and style.) $15/week for 25 words. Over 25 words: 50¢/word. www.sevendaysvt.com/helpyourself or helpyourself@sevendaysvt.com All listings must be reserved and paid for by Thursday at 5 p.m.

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CLASSES AND WELLNESS

education INTRODUCTION TO COLLEGE STUDIES: Mondays or Thursdays, 4-6 p.m., starting January 30. CCV Burlington.

Info, Jody Albright at 802-865-4422.

A free class for high school students and students new to college. This noncredit course helps students make the transition to college by exploring the skills and expectations of college level learning. Instructors: Katie Flanagan, Adam Warrington and Alvin Sturdivant.

tuition, $690. Regular tuition is $740.

Nonrefundable deposit $250. Taught by herbalist Annie McCleary with naturalist George Lisi. Lincoln, Vermont. Info, 802-453-6764, email anniemc@gmavt. net or visit www.WisdomOfTheHerbsSchool.com. VSAC grants available to qualifying participants, please apply early. Weave knowledge and wisdom in a transformational journey with wild plants. Plant identification, plant-spirit communication, wild edibles, herbal remedies, herb walks and nature adventures. Meet Annie and George of Wisdom of the Herbs School, Sunday, January 8, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. at Rhapsody CafĂŠ, 28 Main St., Montpelier, and Sunday, January 15, 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. in Lincoln, please call for directions.

language

fishing FLY TYING COURSE: Saturday or Sunday, January 14-15, six week course. Students may choose Saturday 2-4 p.m. or Sunday 10:30-12:30 a.m. $120. Info, call 863-6105 or email flyfish@together.net. Schirmerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Fly Shop will conduct a the course for beginners who would like to become proficient fly tiers. All materials will be supplied but students need their own tying tools, available at the shop.

gardening 2006 VERMONT MASTER GARDENER BASIC COURSE: Tuesday evenings, February 7 - May 9. Offered statewide. $295., includes tuition and all materials. Info, 802-656-9562 or visit www.uvm.edu/mastergardener. This University of Vermont Extension course covers the basics of home horticulture. Instructors are UVM faculty and Vermont horticulture professionals.

Topics include: Botany, Perennials and Annuals, Landscape Design (Intro), Vegetables, Lawn, Entomology, Plant Diseases, Soils, Woody Ornamentals, Pest Management, Invasive Plant Control, and Becoming a Master Gardener.

RESIDENTIAL LANDSCAPE DESIGN: Mondays, February 6-27, 6-8 p.m. 4 Seasons Garden Center, Williston. $99 before 12/25, $150 after. Info, 802658-2433. Create your own landscape plan and plant your home landscape!

Course includes basic gardening principles, site analysis, needs evaluation, designing with plants, planting guidelines, and hands-on exercises.

herbs WISDOM OF THE HERBS SCHOOL: Wisdom of the Herbs, An Experiential Journey Through the Seasons. Eightmonth Herbal Certification Program.

One weekend a month, April to November, 2006. Pre-register by March 15 for discounted tuition $1550 plus $100 for food. Regular tuition, $1750 plus $100 for food. Nonrefundable $250 deposit. Foundations of Herbalism: A three-month Herbal Program.

May 6-7, June 3-4 and July 1-2, 2006.

Preregister by April 6 for discounted

BONJOUR! FRENCH LESSONS: Info, 233-7676 or maggiestandley@yahoo. com. Private lessons and tutoring for individuals and groups in the Burlington area. Experienced instructor Maggie Standley has lived and worked in France and francophone Africa. She understands the joys and frustrations of learning a foreign language. She can help you conquer verb tenses, work on your accent, prepare for world travel and grasp business, culinary and artistic lingo.

SPANISH: Classes starting in December. Courses conveniently located in Burlington, Montpelier and Warren.

Reasonable rates, with instruction tailored to your individual needs.

International trips information is also available. Info, 917-364-3123 or constanciag@123spanishnow.com.

Improve your Spanish comprehension and speaking skills with a native and experienced teacher.

MARTIAL WAY SELF-DEFENSE CENTER: Day and evening classes for adults. Afternoon and Saturday classes for children. Group and private lessons. Colchester. Free introductory class. Info, 893-8893. Kempo, Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, Arnis and Wing Chun Kung Fu. One minute off I-89 at Exit 17.

MOY YAT KUNG FU: For info on classes in Burlington, call 324-7702 or visit www.kungfuvt.com. The Ving Tsun style was founded by a Buddhist nun and made famous by Bruce Lee. Ving Tsun, pronounced wing chun, is based in relaxation but is best known for being a highly effective system of self-defense.

VERMONT BRAZILIAN JIU-JITSU: Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, Monday through Friday, 6-9 p.m. and Saturdays, 10 a.m. The â&#x20AC;&#x153;Punch Lineâ&#x20AC;? Boxing Class, Tuesdays and Thursdays, 6-7 p.m. Vermont Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, 4 Howard St., A-8, Burlington. First class free. Info, 660-4072 or visit www.bjjusa.com.

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu is a complete martial arts system based on leverage (provides a greater advantage and effect on a much larger opponent) and technique (fundamentals of dominant body position to use the technique to overcome size and strength). Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu enhances balance, flexibility, strength, cardio-respiratory fitness and builds personal courage and self-confidence.

Vermont Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu offers Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and Self-Defense classes (all levels), Boxing and NHB programs available. Brazilian Head Instructor with over 30 years of experience (5-Time Brazilian Champion - Rio de Janeiro), certified under Carlson Gracie. Positive and safe environment. Effective and easy-to-learn techniques that could save your life. Accept no imitations.

meditation

martial arts AIKIDO OF CHAMPLAIN VALLEY: Adult introductory classes begin on Tuesday, January 3, 5:30 p.m. Morning, day and evening classes for adults, seven days a week. Childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s classes, ages 7-12, meet on Saturdays, 9:3010:30 a.m. and Wednesdays, 4-5 p.m.

Muso Shinden Ryu Iaido (the traditional art of sword drawing), Fridays, 5-6:30 p.m. Zazen, Tuesdays, 8-8:45 p.m. Aikido of Champlain Valley, 257 Pine Street, Burlington. Info, 9518900 or www.aikidovt.org. Visitors are always welcome to watch aikido classes. Gift certificates available. We now have a childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s play space for training parents.

BLUE WAVE TAEKWONDO: The benefits of a traditional martial art, with the excitement of a modern sport. Adult, family and childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s classes available, Monday through Thursday evenings and Saturdays for beginners, advanced and competitive students. 182 Main St., Burlington, next to Muddy Waters. Student and family discounts available, all new students receive a free uniform. Info, 658-3359 or email info@bluewavetkd.com or visit www.bluewavetkd. com. Sixth Degree Black Belt and former national team member Gordon White puts over 20 years of experience to use teaching the exciting martial art and Olympic sport of Taekwondo.

Proper body mechanics and Taekwondo technique are emphasized during plyometric, technical and cardio training sessions to improve flexibility, strength and overall fitness.

SHAMBHALA BUDDHIST MEDITATION: Open to the public, Mondays through Thursdays, 6-7 p.m. and Sundays, 9 a.m. - noon. The Burlington Shambhala Center, 187 South Winooski, corner of King St. Free. Info, 802-658-6795 or visit www.burling tonshambhalactr.org. The Burlington Shambhala Center offers meditation as a path to discovering gentleness and wisdom. The Shambhala Cafe meets the first Saturday morning of each month, January 7, for meditation and discussions, 9-11:30 a.m.

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music BLUEGRASS 101: Saturdays, January 7-28, 1-3 p.m. South Burlington. $100. Info, 802-658-2462 or guitboy75@hotmail.com. Do you play bluegrass but donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know how all of the parts of a band â&#x20AC;&#x153;fitâ&#x20AC;?? Join us for a fun, step-by-step workshop covering ensemble construction, lead and harmony singing, instrumental breaks and much more! Andy Greene has performed with such acclaimed groups as Breakaway and the Bluegrass Gospel Project and teaches guitar, banjo, voice, and songwriting.

BURLINGTON COMMUNITY CHOIR: Wednesdays, January 25 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; April 26, 7-8 p.m. CCV Burlington. $45. Register on the web now through January 13. Info, 865-4422 or visit www.CCV.edu . Explore a variety of music including spirituals, traditional and contemporary folk songs, and classical melodies. No auditions required; beginners and â&#x20AC;&#x153;shower singersâ&#x20AC;?

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<helpyourself> MUSIC << 27B welcome! Can also be taken for one credit. Directed by Amity Baker.

FLYNN ARTS SPRING MUSIC CLASSES FOR CHILDREN, TEENS AND ADULTS: Beginning January, 16. Register early and earn a free ticket to a Flynn show. Info, call 802652-4548, email flynnarts@flynncen ter.org, or visit www.flynncenter.org.

Music Makers, ages 1-4, helps parents and children discover the joy of rhythm and song; Jazz Combo Workshops, grades 5-12, Jazz and Blues Vocal Performance, adult, teaches basic skills in improv, melodic and rhythmic phrasing, and Group Guitar Instruction is available for all levels.

JAZZ AND BLUES VOCAL PERFORMANCE: Thursdays, January 26 - May 4, 6-8 p.m. CCV Burlington. Info, Jody Albright at 865-4422, jody.albright@ccv. edu or visit www.ccv.edu. Vocalists will focus on basic skills in improvisation, melodic and rhythmic phrasing, hearing basic blues patterns and understanding song forms. Instructor permission required. Register through CCV for 2 credits or through FlynnArts (652-4548 ext.4) as a non-credit course.

MORE MUSIC CLASSES AT CCV: Most classes start the week January 23 at CCV Burlington. Info, 802-865-4422 or visit www.ccv.edu. Music Fundamentals, Music Theory I, Piano I, Guitar I & II, Intro. to Vocal Performance, Intro. to Technology in Music, Intro. to World Music, and Intro. to Rock and Roll. Music classes cover a variety of musical styles.

enhance the immune system, and speed up recovery time. Give yourself and those you love the gift of Reiki.

shamanism GAY MENâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S SHAMANIC RETREAT WEEKEND: January 20-22, Friday, 6 p.m. - Sunday, 11 a.m. $325, includes meals. Info, http://echoridgeretreat. com/mensworkshop.html. This retreat will teach you how to find your spirit guide. You will learn journeying, Shamanic, Reiki and other energy healing techniques. You will work with other members of the group in healing sessions by using a combination of journeying, intuitive and hands on energy transmission.

pilates CORE STUDIO: Come experience Burlingtonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s premiere by-appointment only Pilates and Personal Training studio! Located conveniently on the waterfront in downtown Burlington, we offer a variety of core strengthening and other well-being related programs.

Our mat and Xercizer bed options include private sessions, small group privates, and drop-in rates for Passport Bed Classes. Small group Hybrid Spinning/Pilates and PowerSculpt classes are also available weekly. The Rolfing Studio offers you the opportunity to work one-on-one with a certified specialist who can restore and reshape your body back into its natural alignment. Our new onsite nutritionist and Reiki practitioner is also available by appointment. Your first consultation and mat classes are always free! Info, 862-8686 or visit www.corestudioburlington.com. Familiarize yourself with our open, welcoming â&#x20AC;&#x153;greenâ&#x20AC;? studio and our professional certified instructors.

PILATES SPACE, A SPACE FOR INTELLIGENT MOVEMENT: Come experience our beautiful, light-filled studio, expert teachers and welcoming atmosphere. We offer Pilates, Anusara-inspired Yoga, Physical Therapy and GyrotonicÂŽ to people of all ages and levels of fitness who want to look good, feel good and experience the freedom of a healthy body.

Conveniently located in Burlington at 208 Flynn Ave. (across from the antique shops, near Oakledge Park).

Want to learn more about Pilates? Call to sign up for a free introduction. We offer intro sessions Saturdays, 10:30 a.m. or we can arrange a time to fit your schedule. Info, 802-863-9900 or visit www.pilatesspace.net. Member of the Pilates Method Alliance, an organization dedicated to establishing certification requirements and continuing education standards for Pilates professionals.

reiki WINTER REIKI CLASSES: Reiki Level 1, Saturday, January 7, February 4 or March 4. Reiki Level II, Saturday, March 18. 9 a.m.- 5 p.m. Healing in Common, Shelburne. Level 1, $150.

Level II, $200. Info, 802-482-7206.

Learn this powerful, hands-on energy work technique. This ancient healing art can lower stress, relieve pain,

skiing SKI/SNOWBOARD MOUNTAINEERING: Varying dates, 9 a.m. - 4 p.m.

Petra Cliffs Mountaineering School. $100-$199. Info, www.petracliffs. com or call 802-657-3872. Locations like Mt. Mansfield, Smugglerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Notch, Mt. Washington, and more! Find secret powder in the backcountry! Participants must have mastery of Level 7 skiing/ snowboarding ability, must be comfortable in ungroomed and gladed terrain.

theater FLYNNARTS SPRING THEATER CLASSES FOR CHILDREN, TEENS AND ADULTS: Beginning January 16. Register early and earn a free ticket to a Flynn show. Info, call 802-652-4548, email flynnarts@flynn center.org, or visit www.flynncenter. org. Creative Drama, grades K-1, Play Makers, grades 2-3, Act 1: Get Into the Act!, grades 4-6, Act 2: Acting Up!, grades 6-8, Acting and Directing for Adults, and Standup Comedy for Adults.

Also: Family Performance Workshops, Theatrical Clowning workshop, and a Playwriting Seminar with William S. Yellow Robe, Jr. THEATER TRAINING INTENSIVE WITH DOUBLE EDGE THEATRE, SHAPING THEATRICAL VISION AND IMAGERY: Tuesday, January 10, 7-8 p.m. $20, (take both DET workshops for $35). Chase Dance Studio, Flynn Center, Burlington. Info, call 802652-4548, email flynnarts@flynncenter.org or visit www.flynncenter.org.

Grade 11-adult, all levels welcome.

Join Double Edge Theatre (DET) for an introduction to the companyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s performance imagery creation and dramaturgy work. Dress in comfortable clothing and bring objects or clothing pieces to include in the creative process.

spirit PSYCHIC DEVELOPMENT: January 19 - March 23, 10 Thursdays, 7-10 p.m., Essex Jct. $165. Info, 802-8993542 or kelman.b@juno.com.

Everyone is psychic, we all have intuition, get hunches. Learn to develop your abilities to make your life easier, more loving and more fun in this series taught by Bernice Kelman since 1975.

tai chi TAI CHI/MONTPELIER: Winter session, Mondays, January 9, 5-6:30 p.m.

64 Main St., 3rd floor. Fee is $42 for first four weeks, $75 for eight weeks or $152 for the entire 16-week series.

Register by January 8. Info, 456-1983 or email grhayes@vtlink.net Instructor Ellie Hayes has been practicing and teaching Hwa Yu Style Tai Chi since 1974. This style features circular movement, deep relaxation and significant health benefits.

TAOIST TAI CHI: Four-month weekly class, Monday, January 9, 7-8:30 p.m. $30 per month. Living Yoga Studio, 35 King St., Burlington. Info, call Deborah at 802-372 5534, please leave message, or email vermont@ taoist.org. The slow, graceful movements help to increase oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s strength and flexibility and improve circulation and balance. This gentle art of both mental and physical health is appropriate for people of all ages and health conditions.

visual arts VISUAL ART CLASSES AT CCV: Most classes start the week of January 23, CCV Burlington, 119 Pearl Street. Info, 802-865-4422 or visit www.ccv.edu.

More than 30 art classes! CCV offers a two-year program in Graphic Design and in Visual Arts. CCV Art classes are taught by well-known Vermont artists.

women INVITING WOMEN WHO SEEK STRUCTURE AND SUPPORT: Women Writing for (a) ChangeÂŽ-Vermont. Monday or Thursday evenings, Jan.- May. Info, Sarah Bartlett, owner-facilitator, visit www.womenwriting.org, affiliates-Vermont, 802-899-3772 or email wwfacvt@aol.com, RE: Class, to register now. In creative, reflective community to start or continue writing for self-discovery, personal healing or social change.

yoga ANUSARA YOGA WEEKEND WORKSHOP WITH SARA ROSE, CERTIFIED ANUSARA TEACHER: January 14 and 15, Shelburne Town Hall. Saturday, 10 a.m. - 1 p.m., $60, 3-5 p.m., $40.

Sunday, 9 a.m. - 12 p.m., $60, 2-4 p.m., $40. Full workshop $150. Info, 802-598-2286 or email heidi@bock. com. Join us for the entire workshop

SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | help yourself 29B CLASSES WELLNESS PLACE AN AD DEADLINES

:: :: :: ::

$15/week or $50/4 weeks for 50 words. (Subject to editing for space and style.) $15/week for 25 words. Over 25 words: 50¢/word. www.sevendaysvt.com/helpyourself or helpyourself@sevendaysvt.com All listings must be reserved and paid for by Thursday at 5 p.m.

YOUR GUIDE TO CLASSES MIND, BODY AND WELLNESS & SPIRIT or choose specific segments. All classes are mixed level. Sara Rose is a certified Anusara yoga teacher and has studied extensively with John Friend, Anusara’s founder. She is dedicated to supporting each student to recognize and celebrate their inherent worthiness and to uncover their infinite potential.

BEECHER HILL YOGA: Daytime and evening classes, weekdays and the third Sunday morning of each month.

Hinesburg. Info, 802-482-3191 or visit beecherhillyoga.com. Develop strength, flexibility and well-being through movement, breath and awareness. Group classes and private instruction. Yoga Massage and Therapeutic Yoga by appointment.

BRISTOL YOGA: Daily Astanga Yoga classes for all levels. Special workshops and classes for beginners, intermediate, series and meditation. Private individual and group classes available by appointment. Old High School, Bristol. $12 drop-in, $100 for ten classes, or $100 monthly pass. Info, 482-5547 or www.bristolyoga.com. This classical form of yoga incorporates balance, strength and flexibility to steady the mind, strengthen the body and free the soul.

BURLINGTON YOGA: Iyengar, Beginner, Kripalu, Flow, Restorative, Kundalini, Beginner Men’s, Prenatal, Postnatal and Partner Yoga. Burlington Yoga, 156 St. Paul St., Burlington. $12/hour, $14 for 90 minutes. $120 for 10-class card. $145 for unlimited monthly membership. Info, 658-9642 or info@burlingtonyoga.com. Burlington Yoga provides a supportive, focused atmosphere for students at all levels to develop and nourish their individual practice. Beginners welcome to all classes. Drop in any time.

ITSY BITSY YOGA AT CHILDREN’S YOGA STUDIO: New session starts Dec. 3 and on January 7. Info and schedules visit www.ChildrensYogaStudio.com or call Kelly, CIBYF at 802-8728985. Learn Itsy Bitsy Yoga, www.ItsyBitsyYoga.com, poses and techniques, developmentally nutritious, that deepen the parent/child bond. Classes offered for Baby (newborn to pre-crawling), Tots (almost crawling to 21 months) and Tykes (22 months to 4 years).

RESTORATIVE YOGA: Monthly Sunday sessions with Emily Garrett. Sessions will be held January 15, February 19, March 12 and April 9, 7-9 p.m. in Studio C at Yoga Vermont, Chace Mill, Burlington. $20 single session, $64 for all

four fall sessions. Registration required.

Info, 660-9718 or visit www.yogaver mont.com. Restorative yoga is a gentle practice that allows the body to open at its own pace. Using props for support, poses are held without effort or force.

Deeply relaxing and therapeutic, students leave with an expanded awareness of their bodies’ unique holding patterns.

YOGA VERMONT: Daily classes, open to all levels. Astanga, Vinyasa, Jivamukti, Kripalu, Gentle Hatha, Sivananda, Restorative, Prenatal, Postnatal, and Baby Yoga. Register for our six-week Yoga for skiers and riders session, Thursdays, January 5 through February 9 with Kathy McNames, 7:30-8:30 p.m. Six-week Introduction to Kripalu Yoga, Mondays, January 30 through March 6 with Emily Garrett, 7:30-8:30 p.m. Six week introduction to Ashtanga Yoga, Wednesdays, January 11 through February 15 with Scott York. Chace Mill, Burlington. $13 drop-in, 10 classes/$100. Month pass $120. Info, 660-9718 or visit www. yogavermont.com. Explore a variety of yoga styles with experienced and passionate instructors in three beautiful, spacious studios on the Winooski River.

Classes seven days a week, open to all levels. >

A BIG THANK

YOU to all those who gave generously at the Vermont Foodbank Day at Stowe on December 3.

We collected 6,226 pounds of food to help feed Vermonters!

//wellness energy A BALANCED ENERGY SYSTEM = health and well-being. Specializing in Reiki, BodyTalk, Brennan-style chakra and aura balancing. Nationally certified with extensive training and experience. Cindy Fulton, MA. 802-482-7206. Shelburne.

feng shui FENG SHUI VERMONT: Consultations for homes, businesses, schools. Space clearing, personal clearing, presentations, workshops.

Certified Feng Shui Practitioner Carol C. Wheelock, M.Ed. 802-4962306, cwheelock@fengshuivermont. com, www.fengshuivermont.com.

massage A HEALING TOUCH: Massage by an experienced and caring professional. Wed. - Sun. Gift certificates available. $55/hour, $65/1.5 hours. Sierra-Maria Magdalena, 862-4677.

ALLIED THERAPIES: Swedish massage, soothing, revitalizing and slippery. Acupressure, healing and groovy. Reiki, subtle yet perplexingly powerful. Healing sounds and scents. Conveniently at your location. $50/hour. Call Pete, 802-371-8589.

ATHLETIC ROY full body massage reenergizes and releases your tired body, mind. Being Chinese American I also know how to accupressurize head and feet. Student discount. 802-660-0888.

DANU THERAPEUTIC MASSAGE at the Woolen Mill, Winooski.

Peace on Earth begins with Massage. Swedish, deep tissue, Reiki or Craniosacral. Gift Certificates! Call Vicky, 802-999-0610.

JOY OF BEING HEALING ARTS: Intuitive, integrated bodywork.

Energy work, circuitry alignment, Swedish, Thai, Reflexology, prenatal massage, Reiki, LaStone Therapy, deep tissue. Twelve years of experience. Gift certificates and brochure available. Nancy Bretschneider, LMT, 363-5282/434-4447.

MASSAGE THERAPY: 1 or 1 1/2-hour sessions for; relaxation, pain relief and restorative healing.

Weekend and evening appointments also available. Jessica Griffin, NCTMB. Williston, 802658-4500.

MASSAGE THERAPY FOR WELLNESS and relaxation. Deep tissue, hot stone, pregnancy and Swedish.

Downtown location. Thembie, CMT, 802-355-9798.

METTA TOUCH: Give the gift of relaxation. Perfect for friend, family or your secret santa. Call Blythe to inquire about gift certificates and mailing options. 802-862-2212, 182 Main St., Burlington.

MOONLIGHT MASSAGE: Journey into the realms of relaxation!

Available in your home or hotel.

Male clientele only. Contact Owen, 802-355-5247, www.moonlightmas sage.com.

REJUVENATING THERAPEUTIC massage. Intuitive and restorative approach used to address individual needs and support self-healing. Gift certificates. Downtown location. Therapeutic only. Caroline O’Connor, 373-4422.

SNOW SORE FROM SKIING, SHOVELING, SNOW BOARDING OR GENERAL WINTER ACHES? Consider rejuvenating bodywork from a Certified Sports and Injury massage therapist. Kastle Combs is accepting new appointments this early winter season. Gift certificates also available. Call 862-8806 x7 to schedule your appointment today! www.healthymassage.INFO. TUESDAYS SPECIAL! 60 min. massage for $45 or 80 min for $55. Experience deep relaxation and therapeutic relief. Other days, times, gift certificates available.

Call Jane at 802-862-8806, ext. 3.

SEVEN DAYS

psychotherapy ANGEL THERAPY: Spiritual counseling specializing in depression and personal growth. Blakely Oakes, M.S. Pathways to Well Being, Burlington. 802-862-8806, ext. 4.

SALLIE WEST, M.A., M.F.T. Individuals and couples counseling. Specializing in relationships and spiritual/personal growth, depression, anxiety and life transitions. Burlington and Waitsfield.

496-7135.

self-realization TRUE HEART THERAPY: Personalized, strengths-based, goal-oriented, creative, guided sessions for emotional, psychological, spiritual well being. Life transitions, relationships, depression, anxiety, addictions. Gail Isabelle Klein, MA, 802-355-6233.

2x15.75-vtfoodbank121405.indd 1

12/13/05 12:02:58 PM

30B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

DEADLINE PHONE FAX

CLASSIFIEDS

monday at 5pm

802.864.5684

802.865.1015

WEBSITE

www.7Dclassifieds.com

CLASSIFIEDSLISTINGS 4 announcements 40 WEEKS OF FUN AND FITNESS skiing/snowboarding day, a free event sponsored by Mobius, The Mentoring Movement, for mentors and their matches, at Bolton Valley, 12/18, 9 a.m. 1 p.m. This program is sponsored by a grant from FAHC. Info, Calen Perkins at 658-1888.

ADOPTION: To love and nurture your baby would be our dream come true. Judy and Tony, tollfree, 1-866-214-6091, pin # 9049.

DIVERSITY IN JOURNALISM: The Academy for Alternative Journalism, established by papers like this one to promote diversity in the alternative press, seeks talented journalists and students (college seniors and up) for a paid summer writing program at Northwestern University Medill School of Journalism. The eight-week program (June 18 - August 13, 2006) aims to recruit talented candidates from diverse backgrounds and train them in magazine-style feature writing. Ten participants will be chosen and paid $3,000 plus housing and travel allowances. For information and a downloadable application visit the Web site at http://www.altjournalism.org.

You may also email us at altacademy@northwestern.edu.

Applications must be postmarked

by February 10, 2006.

Northwestern University is an equal opportunity educator and employer. (AAN CAN) HIP/MOTHERING MAMMAS WANTED for Burlington play group. Interested in starting play group for babies 9-18 mo.

Call 802-865-9642 to organize.

MEDITATION CIRCLE: 5-element medical qi gong in Burlington.

Thursday evenings, weekly. No charge. Contact Evan, evan gl11@netzero.net.

NEED ONE TICKET to Dark Star show on 12/31. Please help.

802-656-5731.

PREGNANT? Thinking adoption?

Talk with caring people specializing in matching birth mothers with loving families nationwide.

Expenses paid. Toll-free, 24/7, One True Gift Adoptions, 866-921-0565. (AAN CAN)

4 art

YOUNG REMBRANDTS SEEKS mature, responsible artists to teach drawing to preschool and elementary-aged children throughout Chittenden County.

Classroom management experience a must. Part-time only.

Must be available at least 2 afternoons, Mon-Thurs, between 2:30-4:30 p.m. Curriculum and training provided. Classes start in Jan. Call 802-879-9278.

4 business opps

EARN $10,000 + MONTHLY. This is realistic and easy to do.

We show you how with fully automated marketing system and with wealth building strategies.

No selling, not MLM. Solid, stable company marketing financial and real estate education. Rapid returns with high profits. 1-800382-0859, ext. 8899.

EARN $3500 WEEKLY! Data entry workers needed online immediately! Work from home!

Guaranteed income! No experience necessary. Register online today! www.DataEntryCash.com.

(AAN CAN).

EARN EXTRA INCOME assembling CD cases from home. No experience necessary! Start immediately! 1-800-267-3944, ext. 800. www.easywork-greatpay.com. Invalid in MD, WI, ND, SD. (AAN CAN) GET PAID $3624 WEEKLY typing from home. Data-entry workers needed online immediately. Everyone qualifies. No experience required. Amazing opportunity! Guaranteed program! www.DataEntryPro.com.

(AAN CAN) GET PAID LIKE A PROFESSIONAL ATHLETE will working at home in your pajamas. Call now, 800-263-2563, ext. 5580.

HOME TYPISTS NEEDED! Earn $3500-$5000 weekly! Typing from home! Guaranteed paychecks! No experience needed!

Positions available today!

Register online now! www.Type 4Cash.com. (AAN CAN) MEDIA MAKE-UP ARTISTS earn up to $500/day for television, CD/videos, film, fashion. Oneweek course in Los Angeles while building portfolio.

Brochure, 310-364-0665 or www.MediaMakeupArtists.com.

(AAN CAN) MISS YOUR KIDS? Working way too much for way too little?

Executive-level pay from home.

Learn how from millionaires. Not MLM. 888-376-1231. (AAN CAN) MYSTERY SHOPPERS: Get paid to shop, earn up to $150 per day. No experience required. Call 800-766-7197. (AAN CAN).

RESOLVE TO BUILD YOUR BUSINESS: Reach 17 million engaged, influential and loyal readers of 100+ newspapers just like this one. Place your ad in the AAN CAN network. For complete information, go to www.aancan.com or call 202289-8484. (AAN CAN).

SUCCESSFUL COLCHESTER tanning and massage salon for sale.

Great location. Large customer base. Turn-key operation. Great opportunity. 802-238-3011.

VENDING BUSINESS FOR SALE. Mostly in Chittenden county but locations elsewhere in Northern VT. Approximately 180 small machines in place and three large machines in place. $52,000. Call Neal, 802-472-3424.

4EMPLOYMENT & BUSINESS OPP. LINE ADS: 75¢ a word.

4HOMEWORKS: 40 words + photo, $40.4LEGALS: Starting at 35¢ a word.

4HOUSING LINE LISTINGS: 25 words for $15. Over 25: 50¢/word.

4FOR SALE BY OWNER: 25 words + photo, $35, 2 weeks $60.

4LINE ADS: 25 words for $10. Over 25: 50¢/word.

4STUFF FOR SALE: FREE! (excluding housing and services).

4DISPLAY ADS: $19.75/col. inch. 4ADULT ADS: $20/col. inch.

R AT E S

SUBMIT

7D

REAL ESTATE, RENTALS, HOUSEMATES AND MORE

All line ads must be prepaid. We take VISA, MASTERCARD & cash, of course.

ANNOUNCEMENTS, BUY THIS STUFF AND MORE

VERY CUTE 10-YEAR-OLD UP FOR ADOPTION. Jamie TwoCoat’s, a specialty toy shop in Shelburne Village, is looking for energetic, child-loving, financially secure “new parents” to bring him/her into adulthood. Owners wish to retire. 10-year-old turnkey operation with transitional help available, if wanted. Serious inquiries from qualified buyers only, please. Please call 9853221 or 985-4174 and leave message for return calls.

4 buy this stuff

100 + HIP-HOP RECORDS, best offer. 2 Yamaha speakers, 500 watt continuous, 1000 peak, $450. Amplifier, Crate SPA 1400, $250. Odyssey coffin, holds 10” mixer and two turntables, $60.

Sony MDR V-500 headphones, $40. Foldaway DJ stand, $60.

Ortofone concord pro black needles w/4 backup stili, $60. Call Charlie at 802-345-8634.

2 PAIRS OF SHAPED VOLANT SKIS w/Marker bindings, aprox.

175 cm, 150 cm poles. Great condition, have only seen powder out West. $100/each or $175/both w/ski bag, accessories, OBO. 802-999-8303.

2000 BURTON 168 Canyon w/size 12 Burton boots and step in bindings. Very good condition. 802-999-1177.

25 MINIATURE QUOTE BOOKS: Mother, Sister, Friend, Gardening, Love, Teddy Bear and more. Great quotes, high quality books. $1.50/ each. Please call 802-879-1137.

3-PIECE COMPUTER SET: Keyboard, monitor and screen, Compaq. $400. 802-879-1936.

4 SMUGGLER’S NOTCH season passes. $400/OBO each. No blackouts or restrictions. Call David at 802-316-9354.

4-PERSON 9-jet in/outdoor Jacuzzi hot tub. Hot tub must go. Needs new cover but works great. New heater and mother board. Must pick up. $750. Call Jamey 802-318-5697.

6-PIECE BEDROOM SET. Butternut, 9-drawer dresser w/twin mirrors, 4-drawer chest, two night stands. Queen or full-size headboard option. $750. Excellent condition. 802-899-2305.

ADULT SEASON PASS TO SMUGGS. $400. 802-999-1177.

ALIEN MASK HEADS. Perfect for dress-up, disguise or play costume. Call 482-6632 or email quarkvt@yahoo.com.

ANTIQUE CHEST: Lots of character, great furniture piece. All wood and metal construction.

Must see to appreciate. Asking $100. Call 802-324-0373.

ANTIQUE WOODEN two-handed tree saws, approx. 6’ long, sometimes used for painting surface.

Contact 802-482-6632 or contrarian@myway.com.

APPLE DESKTOP G4 ‘mirrored door’. 768mb, dual 867 mhz processor, 60gb hd. Works great, looks new! $750/OBO. 802482-5295.

APPLE IMAC 600 MHz G3 128mb 40 GB CD-RW 56K, 15” mon. graphite. Barely used. Incl. mouse, keyboard, original software, manuals and box. $375.

802-482-7206.

APPLIANCES: Kenmore side by side, GE TrueTemp electric range, matching Space Saver under cabinet microwave, white, new, great condition. Renovating, must go. $1000 all/OBO. 802598-9810.

BATMAN, THE ANIMATED SERIES. Three framed cels.

Certificate of Authenticity, numbered. 775-0541.

BEAMS/HAND HEWN: Planking, antique, $4000. 802-355-6998.

BEAUTIFUL HANDCRAFTED 4 POSTER BED. Custom made in VT. Has both canopy and finial post options. Yellow poplar, natural finish, excellent condition.

Must sell. Asking $750/OBO. Call Susan at 802-878-2472.

BEDROOM SET, SOLID PINE: $200. Wicker desk/chair, need painting, $30. Two gas grills w/full tanks, $15/each. Misc. lamps, $5/each. Call 802864-0950.

BERNETTE 4-THREAD SERGER/ OVERLOCK machine by Bernina, used very little; great for sportswear or home decorating (curtains, pillows). Call 802-4826632 or email quarkvt@ yahoo.com.

BOUNCING 40 Palomino spring horse, Hedstrom Moonlight, 1960s collector’s item or great toy for kids. Contact: 482-6632 or email contrarian@myway.com.

BRASS QUEEN or full bed frame. Contact 802-482-6632 or contrarian@myway.com.

BRUNSWICK AIR HOCKEY TABLE, 9’ x 4’, excellent condition. Only asking $100. Please leave message, 802-355-9612.

BUD LIGHT PRESENTS TIM MCGRAW SIGN. Came from Tim McGraw concert at Pepsi Arena.

Ten feet long. Excellent condition. Great collector’s item. $150/OBO. Call 802-249-8092.

BURTON BOOTS AND BINDINGS. Last year’s women’s freestyle boot size US 7 and P1 bindings size medium. Only used 2-3 times. Great condition.

Asking $250. 802-863-5442.

BURTON SNOWBOARD, 2004.

Custom size 158. Comes w/stepin bindings and boots. Excellent condition. $200/OBO. 802233-8955.

BURTON SNOWBOARD BOOTS. Size 8 1/2 men’s. Never used on a mountain because of injury.

Sacrifice, $60. 802-864-7480.

BURTON SNOWBOARD w/ Grateful Dead sticker, 62”. Call 482-6632 or email quarkvt@ yahoo.com.

CAMERA, HAWKEYE KODAK INSTAMATIC, R4, 50 years old in original box, $40. Books: “Treasure Island”, Stevenson, copyright 1909, $30. “Tom Sawyer”, Twain copyright 1917, $30. “Wreck of the Titanic”, copyright 1912, $40. Call 802864-0950.

CHAIR: Heavy oak-framed, deepcushioned, $50. Nylon burgundy 9 x 15 carpet, $75. Storage cabinet, $25. All clean, very good condition. 802-899-2305.

COFFEE TABLE, leather chairs, kitchen cart, full bed are all very new, 4 months! Contact me for pics, sarang_46@hotmail.com.

COLLECTOR AIR BUD POSTER. Call 482-6632 or email quarkvt@yahoo.com.

DG-7 FENDER GUITAR. Great sound. Still has plastic on it.

Comes w/case, picks, instructional video and more. $200.

802-522-6032.

DIAMOND ENGAGEMENT RING. Valued at $3000. 18 k w/platinum setting, will sacrifice for $1700/OBO. 802-598-8829.

DIAMOND RING, ladies solitaire. .27 caret, 18K white gold, 5 1/2 size. $350. 863-3614.

DIAMOND RING MARQUE, worth $1400, asking $800.

Antique mirror set, metal frame, metal shelf w/flowers, $150.

Thomasville dresser, great shape, $300. Sorrel boots, 2 pair, size 7, $25/each. 802-860-9506.

DIAMOND RING: Total of 2 cts of diamonds, one large .75 ct marquie in center, w/platinum and gold setting, size 9 but can change size. Very beautiful, w/all paperwork and warranty.

Asking $1000/OBO. Call 850960-6903.

DR. SNEETCHES STORIES, DR. SEUSS, 1st printing, 1961, rare. $300. Pics. and info, http:// learntosail.net/ebay/seuss.htm.

Call 802-496-4061.

DVD BURNING KIT. Brand new 80 G external hard drive, external DVD burner, dazzle video creator, software and 100 blank DVDs! All for $400. 802-8656863.

ENCYCLOPEDIA BRITANNICA, 1988. Complete with all supplements till year 2000. Amazing, in excellent cond. $400/firm.

802-355-5034, evenings.

ENGAGEMENT RING AND WEDDING BAND. 1 carat tw. 14 K yellow gold. Paid $2000 for both, sacrifice for $750/OBO. Need to sell. 802-893-1744.

ESPRESSO MACHINE: Gaggia Espresso. Used 6 months. New $200 +, will sell for $150. Karen, 802-434-7357.

EXTERIOR insulated steel door.

Contact 802-482-6632 or contrarian@myway.com.

FINE BISQUE PORCELAIN DOLL. “Soft Expressions” w/certificate of authenticity. Very beautiful. Please call 802-7342870 or email betsyrose46@hot mail.com.

FREE SATELLITE TV SYSTEM! 4 rooms including installation, DVRs, HD receivers. Only $19.99 per month. Ext: P797 Promo: P28 1-800-998-DISH. (AAN CAN) GRACO SNUG RIDE infant car seat w/base, gently used, gray. $25. 802-876-3120.

HARDWOOD FRAME. Solid, great shape. Black, queen size mattress. Asking $250. 802324-0373.

HARRISVILLE DESIGNS 26” LOOM. $300. 802-453-2648.

HOT TUB: Portable indoor/outdoor 2 person, 110 volt, insulated, cover, freeze controls. $500.

863-3614.

INVACARE ELECTRIC power wheelchair. 3 years old, good condition. Contact 482-6632 or contrarian@myway.com.

KITCHEN MAPLE CABINETS for 9’ kitchen, $585. GE electric cook top, $100. Stainless steel sink and Moen single-lever faucet, $80. All excellent condition. 802-899-2305.

KODAK DIGITAL CAMERA w/easy share printer dock. Like new. There is so much this camera can do. Please call 802-7342870 or email betsyrose46@ hotmail.com.

LAPTOP COMPUTER: Dell Inspiron 8000 DVD drive.

CD/floppy disk drive - removable.

Large screen. Needs some work to get running properly. Asking $350. Call if interested. 802863-5442.

LARGE SEARS ENTERTAINMENT CENTER: TV opening 28”x24”. 5 ft. long. 4.5 ft. high.

19” wide. Bifold storage on one side. Enclosed shelving under glass on other side. Two drawers under TV. $100/OBO. 879-0566.

Allow phone to ring for a bit.

LEGO SPACE STATION 6991 motor rail set. Brand new, never opened. 568 pieces. Perfect holiday gift. Call 482-6632 or email quarkvt@yahoo.com.

LL BEAN COUCH in good condition. Gray and white striped.

Very lightweight. Fold-out bed but not the typical kind, does not have a metal folding mechanism. Asking $80. 802-578-0420.

LOOM FOR SALE: Robin and Russ, 48”, 4-Harness, Jack-type, w/sectional beam. Beautiful cherry wood. $1500. 802453-5664.

LORD OF THE RINGS brand new boxed collection. Call 802-4826632 or email quarkvt@ yahoo.com.

LOVE SEAT. Nice stained wood frame, solid blue cushions. From This End Up. Good condition.

Pics at http://www.ewensyme. com/sofa/. $45/OBO. 802734-6227.

LUND RACERBACK for 19942001 Dodge Ram pick-up regular cab. Out of box, but never used.

Have all parts. Asking $100/OBO. 434-3865.

MAAX WHIRLPOOL TUB, 8 jets, bone colored. Brand new, never used. Was backordered.

Retails for $1900, will sell for $1400/OBO. 802-793-0311, cell.

MATCHING COUCH AND CHAIR. Reduced price. Now asking $600, was $700. Like new, bought in 2/04. Email krsplw1d@aol.com for pictures.

MICROFIBER SECTIONAL SOFA. $575. 802-999-5345.

MOTORCYCLE HELMET: Black w/out signets or sticker residues, DOT, full head w/movable shield. $50. 802-999-8214.

MOVING SALE, everything must go! Large TV, new desk, chair and mini-fridge. Kitchen table w/chairs, bookshelf, lamp tables, etc. Free stuff and much more.

Call 802-310-5068.

MOVING: Selling double bed, air conditioners, curio chest, W/D, air conditioners. Most in good to excellent condition. Call 802253-1964 or visit www.redtopbg.com/saleitems.htm.

NEED NEW COMPUTER bad credit, no problem! Buy a new computer now and pay for it later. New computers and laptops from $20/month. Call now 1-800-311-1542. (AAN CAN)

7Dclassifieds.com | SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | 7D Classifieds 31B

7D CLASSIFIEDSLISTING NITRO BLACKWIDOW SNOWBOARD: Women’s 05 model, 153 cm, nitro bindings, with or w/o DC gel boots size 8.5. Used only 3 times. Paid $860, asking $450.

Call 802-223-1536 eve, or 802279-3436 days.

NURSING SCRUBS. Never used.

X-large, various prints, very cute. $100/all. 802-291-0006.

PANASONIC MINIATURE RECORDER. 3” long x 1” wide.

Up to 8 hours and 10 min. recording at one time. $30.

Please call 802-879-1137.

PFAFF INDUSTRIAL SEWING MACHINE. New motor, w/table, excellent condition. Used in the apparel industry. Tool kit, needles, thread cone holder. $600.

802-863-6791.

POMPANOOSUC MILLS CHERRY entertainment cabinet, $2000.

Fits 27” TV, 2 drawers, 4 shelves.

Also have TV to go with. Make offer! John 802-985 8397, Shelburne.

PRAM: Baby carriage, Peg Perego from the 70’s, mate in museum. Beautiful wicker and chrome, “creme de la creme”.

Get details. $150/OBO. 802655-6201.

QUEEN SIZE WATERBED, frame and waveless mattress only. Very comfortable! $50/OBO. 802864-7740.

QUILTING FABRICS, many colors, mostly floral prints. 802482-6632 or email: quarkvt@ yahoo.com.

QUILTING/CRAFT BOOKS: Various titles, values to $40 each. Please call 482-6632 or email: quarkvt@yahoo.com.

QUILTING/WEAVING/RUG LOOM w/stand, made in Brazil, $150/OBO. Retails for $295.

802-482-6632 or email: quarkvt@yahoo.com.

REFRIGERATOR: Compact, office type, w/freezer. Dimensions 18” cube. 120 volts 0.68 amp, brown. $25. Call 802-655-4365.

RING: If this is your first Christmas together, this ring is for her. Purple heart stone in a gold setting. Please call 802734-2870 or email betsy rose46@hotmail.com.

ROCKERS: Two maple, $45 and $60. Chest of drawers, $40. 32” x 48” table with 12” leaf, $40.

Small desk and chair, $30. Clean, very good condition. 802899-2305.

ROLAND VS2480 DIGITAL 24 track. Records up to 16 tracks at once! Great condition. CD burner and case incl. $2000/OBO. 802-482-3141.

ROSEMARY TREE: Perfect for Christmas and all year! 3 1/2 ft. tall, in pot. Healthy and pretty. $25/OBO. 802-655-6201.

SELLING ALL HOUSEHOLD FURNITURE/ITEMS. Books, bookshelf, couch and chair, small round kitchen table w/two chairs, lamps, hutch. Please email krsplw1d@aol.com for pictures and prices.

SHIP’S CLOCK: Salem-brass w/mahogany base, from the 70’s.

Beautiful old clock, but movement needs work, more than worth the money. $75/OBO. 802655-6201.

SKI-DOO SNOWMOBILE PANTS and jacket. Worn twice. Paid $300, will sacrifice for $200/OBO. 802-793-0311.

SNOW BLOWER: YardMan by MTD. 9 hp, 28” path, power steering, 6 forward, 2 reverse speeds, electric start, heated handles, toggle chute rotation, halogen headlight, great condition, must sell. $600/OBO. 802899-3278.

SNOW TIRES, used 1/2 season.

195/60R14. $200. 802-496-4105.

SNOWBOARD BOOTS, binding, helmet. Burton Freestyle boots, men’s 10, $65. Synchro bindings, $45. Red helmet, Decaf, size L, green, $40. Call 802-985-5440, eves.

SOLID MAHOGANY BUFFET TABLE: About 50 years old, great shape. Seats 6 to 8, 4 leaves, 3 shelves, 5 drawers.

Must see to appreciate. $300.

Karen, 802-456-1990.

SOLID OAK DINING ROOM table w/2 high-backed chairs.

Perfect condition, minimal use. $300. Karen, 802-456-1990.

SOLOFLEX. $300/OBO. Body by Jake Ab/Back machine, $40.

862-5360.

SOMBRERO: Authentic beautiful red velvet Marachi hat and straw sombrero. Call 482-6632 or email quarkvt@yahoo.com.

SONY FLAT SCREEN w/Kenwood receiver and 6 speaker entertainment system, DVD player and stand. $650. 802-999-5345.

SONY Trinitron 18” flat screen monitor, multiscan E400.

Extremely high resolution. $300/OBO. 802-644-5356.

STACKABLE GAS DRYER. 1 year old, efficient, $300/OBO. Tons of baby stuff, crib, car seats, stroller, wagon, etc. See www.jtglaw.com/personal/stuff or call 802-264-9823.

SUBARU LEGACY WAGON, 1993: AWD, w/4 studded snow tires on rim, runs excellent, paid $1800. Needs alternator. Asking $1000/OBO. 802-496-4105.

TEN NEW SOUND REINFORCEMENT studio acoustic tiles.

ProFoam Polyflex, charcoal gray, 12” x 12” panels, package of 10. $75. Call 802-496-4061.

THOUSANDS OF BEADS and sterling silver clasps, ear wires, etc. Sell at wholesale price, $2000. Call if interested. 802863-5442.

TORO SNOW BLOWER attachment for riding mower or tractor, model 79360, chains and weights. $310. 802-899-2131.

TREK 2200 54 cm. Only rode 535 miles, like new! Fully Ultegra except 105 brakes caliper. Cat Eye astrale cpu w/cadence. San Marco saddle.

Must sell! $1050. 310-4514.

TWO 10” Q-LOGIC SPEAKER BOXES. Brand new! Asking $20/each. 802-355-9612.

TWO COUCHES AND MATCHING CHAIR, dark purple. 1 year old, in perfect condition. $1500/OBO. 802-233-9737.

TYPEWRITER, electronic, Brother Compactronic 333 w/case, manual, extra ribbon, liftoff tapes. $10/OBO. 802-8707506, Burlington.

VARIFLEX CALIFORNIA kids’ skateboard, 28”. New, never used. Call 482-6632 or email quarkvt@yahoo.com.

VCR, JVC HI-FI w/cables, $40.

Call 802-658-1817 and leave message.

VW PASSAT, O.E. alloy rims 7x15 7 spoke with center caps.

Rims are in very good shape. $300/OBO. Call 865-5934.

WASHER AND DRYER supercapacity, brand new, only used for six months. $600/OBO. Holds thirteen large beach towels. Call Tony at 802-343-0874.

WEIDER 8630 TRAINING SYSTEM. Weight stations for all major muscle groups. Like new.

Great gift for Christmas. $100/OBO. 802-644-6657.

WHITE, TOP LOAD KENMORE heavy duty washer. Compact size, 24” wide. Excellent condition.

Will help you move it. Asking $100. 802-999-5052.

WOMEN’S SKI BOOTS. Dolomite FornFit Explorer, size 24. $300/OBO. 802-644-5356.

XBOX BARELY USED. Excellent condition. Two controllers, plus extras. Also comes w/several games. Great Christmas present! $150/firm. Call 802-249-8092.

4 child care

EXPERIENCED INDIVIDUAL WANTED for care of 9-monthold. 10-20 daytime hrs/wk. Refs. req. 802-985-5378.

HOME-BASED CHILD CARE: Looking for a caring, safe, clean environment? I have space for one more child. Will transport.

Refs. upon request. Anne, 802865-3769.

LOOKING FOR CREATIVE, energetic, responsible, person to care for my 1-year-old in Montpelier.

Two Tuesday evenings a month.

Refs. $9/hr. 802-373-8130.

PART-TIME individual assistant needed for energetic 3-year-old boy in my Williston home child care program. 18 hours/week. $10/hour. Experience with special needs children preferred.

Call Jessie, 802-878-9177.

VERMONT NANNY CONNECTION currently needs to fill five full-time positions. Pay ranges between $400- $600/wk w/benefits. If you are at least 18 years of age and have two years of experience working w/children, please visit www.vermontnannyconnection.com for more information and an application.

4 cleaning svcs.

GETTING THE PLACE READY FOR THE HOLIDAYS, or just hoping to bring the sparkle back to your everyday life - a clean home is a happy home! Call Monica at 802-338-0527 or Diane at 802-658-7458.

Environmentally sound housecleaning. Gift certificates available!

1x2-recycleNorth070605

4 computer svcs.

4 free

9-WEEK-OLD LOPPED EAR BUNNIES. Mom no longer wants them in her cage. Very cute and friendly. Can be litter box trained. Please call 802-6442595. Located in Jeffersonville, willing to meet anywhere if interested in viewing/adopting.

FREE BABY HAMSTERS! Dwarf hamsters, very cute, very free, in Burlington. Call David, 802264-9706.

FREE BABY STROLLER. Call 482-6632 or email quarkvt@ yahoo.com.

FREE STANDING BASKETBALL HOOP, BACKBOARD. You pick up. 802-862-7372.

4 lost & found

7/1/05 2:58 PM Page 1 LOST: BOOK OF 100+ CDS. Black, nylon, CaseLogic brand.

Finders will be rewarded, no questions asked. 802-238-7100.

LOST DOG. Lab size, white w/big black spots, very shy. Call if you have seen him. Essex/ Colchester area. 802-878-1649.

LOST RING, 12/09 in Burlington. Silver band edged w/gold, raised engraved silver flowers.

This is my handmade wedding band and is dearly missed. 802734-5001.

4 misc. services IN-HOUSE COMPUTERS: All aspects of computer management by a trained, experienced technician. Super service, all house calls $60/hour or contracts avail. Many references!

John, 802-355-9471.

INTERNET SERVICES: Professional web hosting, applications, e-commerce, databases, and custom websites encryption 1x2 in-house computers for businesses, campaigns, organizations, and nonprofits. www.GMNet.net, 802-264-4851.

In-House

COMPUTERS Repairs, Upgrades & More!

355-9471 We make house calls!

4 computers

CHRISTMAS COMPUTER PACKAGE: Gateway Celleron, 667 MHz, 64 mg RAM, extra 64 incl.

Millinium O/S. Complete w/HP deskjet printer, software and desk. Internet ready. $450. 802862-2824.

4 elder care

HEART & HAND ELDER CARE. Call 802-399-9211.

4 entertainment

BABE LAND X: Exotic dancers, private one-on-ones, escort, outcall, in-call, new club, bachelor parties, new talent welcome, 1800-859-7325.

SOLID GOLD exotic dancers. adult entertainment for birthday, bachelor, holidays and Fun-onone shows. #1 for fun. 802-6581464. New talent welcome.

4 financial

CASH: Immediate cash for structured settlements, annuities, law suits, inheritances, mortgage notes and cash flows. J.G. Wentworth, 800-794-7310. (AAN CAN)

MALE WITCH. Psychic readings and counseling. Casting and removal of spells. Contact with spirits. Call 24/7. Tom 800-4193346. Credit/Debit Cards. Get back the one you love. (ANN CAN)

4 music

ROLLING STONES TICKETS. 4 floor seats! 12 rows from stage.

Sold-out show in Montreal at the 9/23/05 AM $600/tickPage 1 Bell Center.9:38 1/10/06. et. 802-879-0870.

4 music for sale

5-PIECE DRUM SET for Christmas. All cymbals, stands, hihat, footpedal and drumkey incl. Beginner/intermediate kit ready to go for the holidays. $250/OBO. Will deliver. 802482-3141.

50TH ANNIVERSARY EDITION AMERICAN FENDER TELECASTER: Cream w/white pick guard.

Mint condition. Lined hard case.

Excellent gift for serious musician. Serious cash offers only.

Scott, 802-651-4059.

‘52 REISSUE FENDER STRAT, American made in ‘82. $1000.

Great condition. 908-672-4433.

BASS GUITAR: Fender deluxe jazz V, five string, active electronics, black, excellent condition w/Fender hard case. $400.

802-877-6624.

BASS GUITAR: Ibanez Ergodyne 5 string. Good shape. Sounds and plays just like a Soundgear!

Great bass guitar. Asking $300.

Call 802-324-0373.

BEAUTIFUL KOLSTEIN FIDDLE. Warm tone, dark finish, rosewood pegs and tailpiece, LR Baggs pick-up. Appraised at $6000, asking $4500. 802496-9808.

BOUTIQUE GROOVE TUBE “Soul-0 45” guitar amp. Book value, $750. Priced to sell at $600/OBO. Call Jeff at 802-5788830. All tube, 50-watts.

CARVIN XV-112 GUITAR AMPLIFIER, 100 watts. Great condition, awesome tone, $325.

Pignose Hog 30 portable bass amp, very good condition, $115.

Call Brad at 802-453-3902.

COLDPLAY TICKETS: 4/03, Manchester, NH. Section 103, Row L, seats 9, 10, 11. Three at face value - $90 each. 802651-9043.

DEAN ACOUSTIC/ELECTRIC, 12 string guitar w/premium gig bag. Model, performer #SE12GN. Great condition, asking $200.

508-237-8125.

FENDER BASSMAN 100 AMP. Vintage 2001, new condition. $250. Call before 6 p.m., 802862-1591 or email craig.trum bo@uvm.edu.

FENDER TELECASTER GUITAR, 1988, American made. Very good condition, w/hardcase. $525.

Call 802-864-7480.

GALLIEN KRUEGER MB150 bass amp w/112MBX extension speaker. State of the art stereo amp, metal casing, built-in chorus, EQ, ample inputs/outputs/ options. New $1100, a steal at $675/OBO. 802-658-5522, leave message.

GUITAR: Fender Mexican Strat.

Starburst. Paid $675 last Christmas, will sacrifice for $400 w/fender gig bag. Offer is firm.

Great X-mas gift. Call Jamey, 802-318-5697.

HAMMOND ORGAN, RT3, a B3 w/extra pedal section, and Leslie 900, 100w Solid State. Both in excellent condition. $1800/OBO. 802-864-7740.

MACKIE MIXING BOARD, DOD compressor, Alesis EQ, Sony DAT, Fostex B-16 Reel-to-Reel, Alesis MIDI sequencer, guitar DI box. $1500/all, OBO/each. 802864-7740.

NEW YAMAHA BBG4S electric bass w/gig bag, $450. Pictures at http://learntosail.net/music/.

Call 802-496-4061.

PIANO: 1937 Baby Grand piano for sale to good home. $1500.

Beautiful details, good sound.

802-999-7848.

PIANO: Yamaha U1 Professional series. Excellent condition, beautiful tone. Maintained and tuned regularly by Hansen Pianos. New: $7000, asking $2950. 802872-0544.

SCHECTER C-1+ ELECTRIC GUITAR, $425. Peavy classic 50 guitar amp, 4 - 10s, $600. Fender blues junior guitar amp, $350.

All in excellent condition. 802759-2529.

UPRIGHT PIANO. Handsome burled wood on front. Sounds beautiful. Excellent condition. $1000. 802-862-5007.

4 music instruct.

BASS GUITAR LESSONS w/Aram Bedrosian. All levels welcome!

Years of teaching experience.

Gordon Stone band, Concentric, former Advance Guitar Summit winner. Convenient Pine St. location. 802-598-8861, www.arambedrosian.com.

DRUM LESSONS: Experienced, energetic instructor w/touring experience in US/Europe, seeks students of all ages/abilities.

Ref. avail. Web: http://steve hadeka.com., 802-658-6205 or email steve@stevehadeka.com.

GUITAR: Berklee graduate with classical background offers lessons in guitar, theory and ear training. Individualized, step-bystep approach. I enjoy teaching all ages/styles/levels. Call Rick Belford, 864-7195.

GUITAR INSTRUCTION: All styles/levels. Emphasis on developing strong technique, thorough musicianship, personal style. Paul Asbell (Unknown Blues Band, Kilimanjaro, Sneakers Jazz Band, etc.), 8627696, www.paulasbell.com.

4 music services

COSMIC HILL project recording studio. 30-years experience. $40/hour. Moretown. 496-3166.

WHICH STUDIO? The one with huge rooms, Pro Tools HD3, Yamaha Grand Piano and tons more! The professional studio.

Egan Media Studios. www.eganmedia.com.

4 musicians wanted DRUMMER WANTED for established, working, weekend rock band. Must be experienced, versatile, professional attitude, with equipment, transportation.

Chittenden/Franklin county residency preferred. Commitment for one weeknight and weekends required. 802-893-4094 or 802524-2008.

LEAD GUITAR PLAYER WANTED, vocals a plus. We are an established band with drums, bass, keyboard/rhythm guitar.

We play rock, reggae and lots of originals. Call Howard at 802578-3218.

LOVE 60’S ROCK? Guitarist with rehearsal space seeks others for jam band. Hendrix, Stones, Neil, Cream, Zep, etc. Call Ken 802425-5200 or ken@kenfrenchme dia.com.

SINGER LOOKING FOR MUSICIANS interested in starting a band. Strong range and diverse interest in music. Has decent practice space and a drum set.

301-651-8003.

WORKING ORIGINAL HEAVY ROCK BAND seeks motivated, professional minded singer with adequate range and balls who’s willing to travel. Demos encouraged. Call 802-476-4167.

4 pets

BABY BALL PYTHON. Excellent eater, incl. tank and everything you need to properly care for him $100. 802-316-9448.

BEAUTIFUL, NEUTERED, 4YEAR-OLD male Akita/Husky mix. Housebroken, great w/kids and other dogs. No cats.

Looking for a loving home. Call 860-324-5497.

DOG SITTER NEEDED 12/2312/27. Loving/active 14-yearold dog needs companionship and care while I’m away. My S. Union apt. or your home. Please call, 814-571-4039. $$$ FERRET, 9 WEEKS OLD, incl. cage, bedding, food, toys and many other accessories. Lovable, cute, affectionate, had trouble w/landlord. Spent over $325 two weeks ago. Asking $150/OBO. 802-598-1805.

GRAY COCKATIELS: 2 years old, male and female, incl. cage and all accessories, $150. 802316-9448.

LOST CAT NILE since 12/01 from Essex. Tawny/black stripes w/white chest/belly/paws.

Please call Amanda at 802522-8318.

MIN. SCHNAUZERS: 2 females, 10 months old. 1 male stud, 2 years. 16-month-old, parti male.

Reducing breeding stock. $450.

802-872-5874.

SIAMESE KITTENS: $150. 802865-5046.

WONDERFUL CAT: Free to the right family. We love her, but I’m allergic. Loves being outside, affectionate, great w/kids and dogs. Call Alison at 802318-7043.

4 photography

ASPIRING FEMALE MODELS WANTED to work w/fashion photographer in exchange for portfolio, experience. Contact David, 373-1912, email rusldp@juno.com or visit www.rusldp.com. Great opportunity for beginners.

4 professional svcs.

ATTENTION LANDLORDS: EQUINOX PROPERTY SERVICES. All aspects maintenance.

Plowing, salting, roof clearing, snow blowing, apartment turnovers, painting, cleaning, clean outs, plumbing, hauling, appliance install/delivery.

Insured. 802-865-4258.

CALL THE PLOW KING. Plow services for Burlington area.

Reasonable prices, reliable service. Private homes, businesses and commercial real estate. Call 802-318-7641.

HELPING HANDS: Need a hand this holiday season? Pet/house sitting, child care, cleaning, organizing, errands, party planning and assistance.

Responsible, resourceful, professional, references. Maggie, 802233-7676.

32B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

7D LEGALS/SUPPORTGROUPS HOUSECLEANING: Concerned about your health and the environment? I clean using only nontoxic and environmentally friendly cleaning products.

References available and free estimates. Call Kathy at 802285-6263 or 802-233-1697.

PET SITTING. Go to www.pre pawpetcare.com for info.

PROFESSIONAL HOUSEKEEPING: 18 + years experience. If interested please call Betsy at 802-734-2870 or email betsy rose46@hotmail.com.

RECENTLY RELOCATED CHEF FROM world-class establishment looking for full-time, long-term employment. Are you looking for someone to change the way your kitchen runs? Please email chefscottandrew@adelphia.net.

SICK OF DOG KENNELS? Leave your pooch at a friendly home while you’re away. We’ll walk, feed, house and love your dog in your absence. $15/day. 802793-1286.

TIDY HOUSES BY T.T. Experienced residential cleaner.

Reliable, efficient and honest.

Great rates and references.

Contact Tanya at 802-655-5071 or email Tbirdvt@verizon.net.

TREAT YOURSELF OR A LOVED ONE to chemical, free housecleaning at its best. Organizing and more. Respectful and reliable. Call today. 802-453-7871.

4 travel

ECUADOR TRIPS: Low-cost, 1week trips to lively town at edge of the rainforest. Can be tailored to interests like agriculture, environment, education, healthcare, etc. Beautiful lodging & weather! Get a taste of daily life, relax, see the area, gain insight into dev. issues. Led by ex-Peace Corps Vol. (and Burlington resident) with tons of connections in the community.

For info, call Keith at 877-4357592 (rings in Ecuador) or email kparisella@yahoo.com.

4 volunteers

TRULY MAKE A DIFFERENCE for a child, volunteer! Help parents and children learn the skills they need to strengthen themselves and their families. Call 1800-Children or contact Kim Holmes, 802-864-6492.

VOLUNTEERS NEEDED to help victims of intimate partner violence! Domestic Abuse Helpline for Men and Women, a nationally known, all-volunteer-run nonprofit organization, is looking for helpline volunteers. Please call 1-866-786-0758 for more info. Applications for the upcoming trainings are now being accepted.

4 want to buy

ADULT XXX HOMEMADE VHS, 8 mm, or DVD movies. I want the real thing. Out of area collector, not for resale. Contact thecatmax@aol.com.

ANTIQUES: Furniture, postcards, pottery, cameras, toys, medical tools, lab glass, photographs, slide rules, license plates and silver. Anything unusual or unique. Cash paid. Call Dave at 802-859-8966.

NEEDED FREE BARDBOARD. Will pick up. Call Rich 802658-2433.

OLD 1970’S AND EARLIER, VHS tapes or 8 mm movies of adult/xxx nature. Out of area collector, not for resale. Contact thecatmax@aol.com.

4 legals

PUBLIC HEARING SOUTH BURLINGTON DEVELOPMENT REVIEW BOARD The South Burlington Development Review Board will hold a public hearing at the South Burlington City Hall Conference Room, 575 Dorset Street, South Burlington, Vermont on Tuesday, January 3, 2006 at 7:30 P.M. to consider the following:

1. Master plan application #MP05-02 of South Village Communities, LLC, to amend a planned unit development consisting of: 1) a 334 residential unit traditional neighborhood design to include single family, two (2) family, and multi-family dwellings, 2) a 100 student educational facility, and 3) a community building to support a 35 acre farm. The amendment consists of: 1) eliminating two (2) streets, 2) relocating a street to reduce wetland impacts, and 3) revising the lot layout resulting from the street modifications, 1840 Spear Street.

2. Preliminary plat application #SD-05-92 of South Village Communities, LLC to amend a planned unit development of Phase I consisting of 150 residential units and a 100 student education facility, of a 334 residential unit project. 1) The amendment consists of: 1) realigning the connector street to Phase III, and 2) revising the lot layout, 1840 Spear Street.

3. Application #VR-05-03 of John Stephen & Elizabeth Caflisch for a variance from Section 3.06, Setbacks and Buffers, of the South Burlington Land Development Regulations.

Request is for permission to allow a retaining wall (accessory structure) to extend to either side property line thereby projecting five (5) feet into each setback requirement, 105 Central Avenue.

4. Application #VR-05-04 of John Stephen & Elizabeth Caflisch for a variance from Section 3.06, Setbacks and Buffers, of the South Burlington Land Development Regulations.

Request is for permission to allow a retaining wall (accessory structure) to extend to the north side property line thereby projecting five (5) feet into the setback requirement, 105 Central Avenue.

Copies of the applications are available for public inspection at the South Burlington City Hall.

John Dinklage, Chairman South Burlington Development Review Board December 14, 2005

4 support groups

DON’T SEE A SUPPORT group here that meets your needs? Call Vermont 2-1-1, a program of United Ways of Vermont. Within Vermont, dial 2-1-1 or 866-6524636 (toll-free) or from outside of Vermont, 802-652-4636.

Monday-Friday, 8:30 a.m. - 4:30 p.m.

ARE YOU A CLOSET SINGER? Do you have a good voice (haven’t made the dogs howl) but are afraid of fainting in public while performing? Join a group to support, sing and perform in an intimate setting.

802-893-1819.

DEVELOPING SELF-ESTEEM: For abused, lonely women at Border’s, upstairs in the coffee shop, Mondays, 5 p.m., ongoing, 658-2976.

BRAIN INJURY ASSOCIATION OF VERMONT: Montpelier daytime support group meets first and third Thursday of the month at the Unitarian Church “ramp entrance” from 1:30-2:30 p.m.

Call helpline at 1-877-856-1772.

BRAIN INJURY ASSOCIATION OF VERMONT: Montpelier evening support group meets the first Tuesday of each month at Vermont Protection and Advocacy, 141 Main St. suite 7 in conference room #2 from 6-8 p.m. Call our helpline at 1-877856-1772.

BRAIN INJURY ASSOCIATION OF VERMONT: St. Albans evening support group meets the second Monday of each month at Northwestern Medical Center, 133 Fairfield Street from 6:308:30 p.m. Call our helpline at 1877-856-1772.

BRAIN INJURY ASSOCIATION OF VERMONT: Bennington day support group meets the first Friday of the month at Second Congregational Church, Hillside Street from 1-2 p.m. Call helpline at 1-877-856-1772.

TEEN GIRLS GROUP: 10-week therapy group for teen girls who would like a place to talk. Call RiverValley Associates for more information, 802-651-7520.

SOCIAL SKILLS GROUP: Girls 912 years old needing help with social skills/friendship. Please call RiverValley Associates for more information, 802-651-7520.

THE WOMEN’S RAPE CRISIS CENTER is offering a free, confidential 10-week support group for women who have survived sexual assault. Beginning November 3. Info, 864-0555.

OCD SUPPORT GROUP/THERAPY GROUP: Come share your experience, get support from those who have been there, learn about Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and how to reduce its symptoms. Therapist facilitated. Weekly meetings, 802-343-8114.

NW VT GAY AND LESBIAN Foster and Adoptive Parent Support Group: 6-8 p.m. The third Thursday of each month, starting October 20 through May, 2006. Casey Family Services, 46 Main St., Winooski.

AUTISM: Free support group for parents and caregivers of children with ASD. Montpelier, 2nd Sunday of the month, 3-5 p.m. at the Family Center. Call Jessica, 249-7961 for child care inquires.

More info, www.aaware.org.

BIPOLAR SUPPORT GROUP open to new members. Meets downtown. Our goal is to become healthy and happy. For info, call Gerhard at 951-2543.

SUPPORT GROUP FOR MOTHERS OF CHILDREN WHO HAVE SURVIVED CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE: The Women’s Rape Crisis Center in conjunction with Family Connection Center offers a free, confidential, ten-week support group, beginning on October 25. Info, 802-864-0555.

PARTNERS OF CHILDHOOD SEXUAL ABUSE SURVIVORS. Meet 4th Monday of month. R.U.1.2?

Center, 34 Elmwood Ave., 6:30-8 p.m. Call Timberly, 310-3889 or email missmor pheus1@yahoo. com for more info.

ALZHEIMER’S DISEASE and Dementia support group. Held the last Tuesday of every month at Birchwood Terrace, Burlington. Info, contact Stefanie Catella, 863-6384.

WEEKLY SMOKING CESSATION support group: Small groups.

Caring atmosphere. Stop smoking in just 21 days using natural, proven, safe methods. No unhealthy drugs. Call 264-1924.

WEEKLY WEIGHT-LOSS support group: Small groups. Caring atmosphere. Get great results using natural, proven, safe methods. No unhealthy dieting.

Call 264-1924.

FAMILY AND FRIENDS SUPPORT GROUP: If someone in your family or one of your friends is in an abusive relationship, this new support group is designed especially for you.

Info, call Women Helping Battered Women 658-1996.

ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION SUPPORT GROUP: Daily except Sundays, 1-2 p.m. Focus is on mutual support and coping skills. 300 Flynn Ave. Info, 865-6138.

MALE SUPPORT GROUP: For men who have survived sexual violence. This group will provide a safe, encouraging space for survivors of sexual assault to share their stories with other men. Offered by the Women’s Rape Crisis Center. Info, 802864-0555 or the 24-hour hotline, 802-863-1236.

PARENTING GROUP: 6-week group for people parenting children of all ages now forming.

Please call RiverValley Associates for more information. 651-7520.

HAIR PULLERS SUPPORT GROUP: The Vermont TTM Support Group is a new support group for adult pullers (18+) affected by trichotillomania (chronic hair pulling) as well as parents of pullers. This will be a supportive, safe, comfortable and confidential environment.

Meets on the 4th Monday of every month, 6-7:30 p.m. First Unitarian Universalist Society, 152 Pearl St., Burlington. Info, 453-3688 or vermont_ttmout reach@yahoo.com.

DEPERSONALIZATION AND DEREALIZATION: If you suffer from either of these trance states, please call Todd, 864-4285.

THE CHAMPLAIN VALLEY EAST CHAPTER of the Compassionate Friends meets on the third Tuesday of each month, 7-9 p.m. at the Christ Church Presbyter-ian, 400 Redstone Campus, UVM. Info, 482-5319. The meetings are for parents, grandparents and adult siblings who have experienced the death of a child at any age from any cause.

HEPATITIS C SUPPORT GROUP for those who have H-C, their family members and friends.

Wednesday, November 9, 6:307:30 p.m. McClure MultiGenerational Center, 241 N. Winooski Ave. Burlington. Info, 802355-8936.

DIABETES EDUCATION and Support Group of Chittenden County meets the third Thursday of every month at the Williston Federated Church, 6:30-8 p.m.

We often have guest speakers.

Info, 847-2278.

CHADD is a support organization for children and adults with AD/HD. Every second Wednesday of the month. Champlain College, Global Technology Building, Maple St., Room 217, Burlington, VT. MOOD DISORDER SUPPORT GROUP: Every Monday, 4:30-6 p.m. Pastor United Church. Info, contact Lorraine, 485-4934.

WOMEN HELPING BATTERED WOMEN offers free, confidential educational support groups for women who have fled, are fleeing or are still living in a world where intimate partner violence is present. WHBW offers a variety of groups to meet the diverse needs of women and children in this community. Info, 658-1996.

VT PARENTS OF FOOD ALLERGY CHILDREN EMAIL SUPPORT TEAM: Info, contact MaryKay Hill, www.VTPFAC.com or call 802-373-0351.

MIXED GENDER COMING OUT SUPPORT GROUP: Every 2nd and 4th Thursday, 6:30 p.m. Cofacilitated by supportive peers and mental-health professionals and open to all lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning adults age 23 and up.

Check out this group meeting at R.U.1.2?.

TRANS SOCIAL AND SUPPORT GROUP: First Wednesday, 6:30 p.m. Looking for peer support among other transgendered folks? Need a safe space to relax and be yourself? Check out this group meeting at R.U.1.2?

60+ SUPPORT GROUP: Ongoing weekly support group for men and women over the age of 60.

Share your strengths and struggles with this particular stage of life. We have fun! Facilitated

by Barbara L. Kester, Ph.D. 657-3668.

MOOD DISORDER SUPPORT GROUP: First group meeting, Monday, November 8, 4:15-6 p.m., Northfield United Church, Main St. Info, 485-4934 or email suppgrp@yahoo.com.

TOPS (Taking Off Pounds Sensibly) Chapter meeting, St. Francis Xavier School, Winooski.

Sundays, 6 p.m. weigh-in, 6:307:30 p.m. meeting. Info, call Fred or Bennye, 655-3317 or Patricia, 658-6904.

INTERESTED IN WRITING for children? Support and critique group meets monthly. Call Anne, 861-6000 or anne@booksby me.us.

NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS is a group of recovering addicts who live without the use of drugs. It costs nothing to join. The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop using. Info, 8624516, or visit www.together. net/~cvana. Held in Burlington, South Burlington and Colchester.

For more information, call 8608388 or toll-free, 1-866972-5266.

SURVIVORS OF SUICIDE: Support group for those who have lost a loved one to suicide.

Meets the 2nd Wednesday of every month at the Holiday Inn in South Burlington, (1068 Williston Rd.), from 6-7:30 p.m.

For more information, please contact Cory Gould, 223-4111 or cgould1136@earthlink.net.

Sponsored by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention-VT. SEX AND LOVE ADDICTS ANONYMOUS: 12-step recovery group. Do you have a problem with sex or relationships? We can help. Sunday meetings, 78:30 p.m. Men call Sandy, 8635708. Women call Valerie, 802233-3447.

SUICIDE SURVIVORS GROUP: Survivors and their families meet monthly for mutual support in the Burlington area, 6-7 p.m.

Call for location, 223-4111.

SMOKING CESSATION GROUP: Willing to kick the habit? This free, five-week program helps quitters to follow through.

Community Health Center of Burlington, 5:30-6:30 p.m. Free.

Info, 864-6309.

DOES YOUR PARTNER/SPOUSE HAVE AD/HD (Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder)?

Support group meets every other week in Burlington to share experiences, challenges, laughs, resources. Want more information? Write addpartner@ yahoo.com.

WEDNESDAYS CIRCLE: A Transpersonal support group, every Wed., 6 p.m., Innerharmony Community Wellness Center, Rt. 100N, Rochester, VT. 767-6092. A sharing circle focusing on personal growth, transformation, spirituality and healing, led by Jim Dodds.

DECLUTTERS SUPPORT GROUP: Are you ready to make improvements but find it overwhelming? Maybe 2 or 3 of us can get together to help each simplify. 453-3612.

PARENTS TOGETHER: Support group will be meeting in Rutland on Monday evenings. Snacks and child care provided. All groups are free and confidential. Please call Amy at 247-5460 for more information.

WOMEN CHANGING: A continuous educational support group for women who are interested in changing patterns in their lives.

Wednesdays-ongoing. 12:30-2 p.m. Call Angie at AWARE in Hardwick, 472-6463.

SUPPORT GROUP FOR WOMEN who have experienced intimate partner abuse, facilitated by Battered Women’s Services and Shelter of Washington County.

Please call 1-877-543-9498 for more info.

AHOY BREAST CANCER SURVIVORS: Join our support group where the focus is on living, not on the disease. We are a team of dragon boaters. Learn all about this paddle sport and its healthgiving, life-affirming qualities.

Any age. No athletic experience needed. Call Linda at 802-4344423 or email: dragonheartver mont@gmavt.net or go to: www.dragonheartvermont.org.

NAKED IN VERMONT: The premier Nudist/Skinnydipper organization in Vermont offering information library, message board, chat room, yahoo group, and more. (ALL FREE) Visit www.nakedinvermont.com.

SCLERODERMA FOUNDATION New England: Info, Blythe Leonard, 878-0732 or atblythel@aol.com.

OLDER WOMEN EXERCISING TOGETHER: For motivation to do what’s necessary. Call Anne, 861-6000.

ALS (LOU GEHRIG’S DISEASE) monthly support group: For patients, caregivers and loved ones who are living or have lived with ALS. Third Thursday of the month, 1-3 p.m. Jim’s House, 1266 Creamery Rd., Williston.

Info and directions, 802-8628882 or vt@alsanne.org.

AL-ANON: Thursdays, 12:301:30 p.m. at the AWARE office, 88 High St., Hardwick. Info, 472-6463.

WOMEN IN TRANSITION: Join a support/social group for women who are separated or divorced. The goal is to form a circle of friends for support and social activities. If interested email Katherine at MKR27609@ aol.com.

SMART RECOVERY: Wellgrounded researched approaches to changing addictive behaviors.

Alternative to 12 Step Groups.

Fridays, 5:30 p.m., 82 Winooski Ave., Burlington (above the City Market). Info, contact Bob, 4254058 or email carmody@madriv er.com.

BRAIN INJURY ASSOCIATION of Vermont: Daytime support group meets the second Thursday of each month at the Fanny Allen Hospital in Colchester, from 12-2 p.m. For more info, contact Polly Erickson at 847-6941.

METHADONE ANONYMOUS: A medication-assisted recovery support group. Tuesdays, 7-8 p.m. The Alano Club. Directions: Rt. 15 Fort Ethan Allen entrance, Barnes Ave., third right on to Hegeman Ave., #74 on left. All are welcome.

TRANS PARTNERS support group: Meet and talk w/other partners of transgendered/transsexual people. The second Friday of every month. R.U.1.2? Community Center, 6 p.m. 860-RU12.

HARD-OF-HEARING support group: I’m starting a support group for adults who have a hearing loss that affects the quality of their work/family/social life. Let’s share personal experiences and knowledge of hearing-aid technology. Marlene, 865-9781.

SKINNYDIPPERS UNITE! Visit Vermont Au Naturel. Join other naturists and like-minded people for support, discussions and more! www.vermontaunaturel.com.

PARENTS TOGETHER support groups: Would you like to talk and share ideas with other parents about the joys and challenges of children? Support groups for all parents. Desireah, 796-3119.

MENTAL ILLNESSES: The National Alliance for the Mentally Ill holds support meetings for the families and friends of the mentally ill at Howard Center, corner of Flynn and Pine.

Second and fourth Tuesdays of every month at 7 p.m. Park in Pine St. lot and walk down ramp. 862-6683 for info.

NONCUSTODIAL SUPPORT group for parents. Contact Bill Bagdon, 434-6495.

ARE YOU UNABLE TO get out of debt? Do you spend more than you earn? Is it a problem for you? Get help at Debtor’s Anonymous. Wednesdays, 7:308:30 p.m. The Alano Club, 74 Hegeman Ave., Fort Ethan Allen, Colchester. Contact Valerie P. at 324-7847.

BRAIN INJURY: Open to people who sustained a brain injury, their caregivers and family.

Expert speakers often scheduled.

1st Wed. of every month, 6-8 p.m. Fanny Allen Campus, Colchester. Call Barb Winters, 434-7244.

LESBIAN, GAY, BISEXUAL, Transgender, Queer and Questioning: Support groups for survivors of partner violence, sexual violence and bias/hate crimes. Free and confidential.

SafeSpace, 863-0003 or 866869-7341 (toll-free).

MENTAL HEALTH RECOVERY group: support and education for people with psychiatric challenges. Joan, 865-6135.

7Dclassifieds.com | SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | 7D Classifieds 33B

7D ONTHEROADVEHICLES 1x2-Shearer042005

4 automotive

XBSOJOH"

JEEP WRANGLER, 1998: 4.0L, TOYOTA TERCEL, 1993: Beloved 6 cy., 5-speed, hard and soft car for parts or fixing. Most 1991 SAAB 900, great winter tops, full doors, cruise, A/C, recent service records available.

Make sure you listen to this car. New brakes, battery, shocks.

Alpine/Infinity stereo. Borla Body has little to no rust, $750. 657-2642.

FREE Consumer Help Line header.

Custom carbon fiber engine runs great. 158 K. AUDI, 1999: A4 station wagon.

Before you purchase your next used car! fenders. Asking $13,000. Call $400/OBO. 802-238-4151.

AWD, PS/PW/PD, 2 sets of alloys.

802-999-4582.

TOYOTA TERCEL WAGON, 1987: Sun/moon roof. Heated seats Find out the questions you should MITSUBISHI GALANT LS, 4WD, 5-speed, 160 K. Inspected and mirrors. 78 K. All records. every private owner or car dealer ask 2003: 39 K, FL. A/A wheels and thru 2/06. A good car, engine $9400/OBO. 802-793-8612.

Hakkapeliittas, leather, power runs great, needs some strut and before you go to look at the car!

BMW X5, 2004: Mint condition. seats, sun roof. Great gas bearing work. $350/OBO. Call Fully loaded. Platinum, leather, Call the Toll Free 24hr. Help Line at: mileage! NADA average retail evenings, 802-527-1606. sun roof. Winter package. iPod price, $13,825/OBO. 802-318VOLVO 760, 1987: Sedan. Gold 1-866-838-3345 integration, etc. Gorgeous. Fully 4324 or calogera924@hot w/gold center msw wheels. Car or go online: tax deductible! 617-501-6165. mail.com. runs and drives very well. Just www.usedcarexperts.net BUICK LeSABRE, 2001, limited NISSAN PATHFINDER, 1995: over 197 K, but lots of life left. edition 4dr., gold, V6/3.8L, V6, 4WD, 54 K, 5-speed, tow New brakes/rear shocks. Call SATURN SC 2, 1996: 5-speed, auto., FWD. 45,734 miles. A/C, package, block heater, tires 802-683-8002. ps, antilock trac control, 189 K, PS, PW, PL, cruise, AM/FM/ 1x2-autocraftsman.indd 12/2/05 till 11:42:13 AMVOLVO 850 WAGON, 1994: almost new, original parts. rebuilt at 140 1K. Inspected CD/cass., OnStar, air bags. Best Excellent condition! $6000. Call Standard, fully loaded, leather, 6 4/06. Recent windshield, rear price, $11,898. Call Shearer 802-864-1125.

CD, sun roof, heated seats, etc. brakes.

Great in snow.

Pontiac, 658-1212.

OLDSMOBILE INTRIGUE, 2000: Southern car. Runs great. $1500/OBO. 802-893-0469.

CADILLAC, 1992, black, red No rust, no dents. Runs great, $3500/OBO. Must sell. Call 315SATURN SL2, 1995: 124 K, reliinterior, 4-door., low mileage. power everything, rear spoiler.

491-8615. able, $1000/OBO. Moving must 973-476-9502.

CD/CASS/FM/AM stereo, AC, VOLVO C70, 1999: 76 K, silver, sell.

802-355-1225.

CADILLAC DeVILLE, 2005, cruise, keyless entry. Too small, dark leather interior. 5-speed, SATURN SW2, 1996: 140 K, 5sedan, 4-dr., silver, V8/4.6L, must sell. $4000/firm. 802sun roof, premium audio, 17” speed, ps, pb, pw, pl, antilock auto., FWD, 18,192 miles, A/C, PS, 655-3413. wheels. Great car, excellent perbrakes, traction control, new PW, PL, cruise, AM/FM/CD, OnStar, GRAND VOYAGER PLYMOUTH formance and safety record. runs/drives brakes/exhaust, air bags. Best price, $21,954.

LE, 1991: 3.3 6-cyl., 180 K, $9500/OBO. 802-238-9403. great, 35+ mpg. Relocating, must Shearer Pontiac, 658-1212. loaded, new starter, fuel pump, VOLVO S70 GLT, 1998: Turbo, sell. $1800. 802-233-1803.

CHEVROLET TRACKER LT tires, exhaust, brakes, recent silver, summer and winter tires, SUBARU FORESTER, 2001: SPORT UTILITY, 2003: 4-door, tranny, shocks, AC and more. black leather, fully loaded, AWD, 88 K, snow tires/all seared, V6, 2.5 L, auto, 4WD, $1500/OBO. 802-864-7740.

CD/cassette, 115 K, mostly highsons, new brakes, timing belt, AC/CD/AM/FM, cruise, ABS, roof PONTIAC GRAND AM SE, 2005, way. $7500. 802-425-2304.

12-disc Pioneer player, good rack, privacy glass, towing pkg., sedan, maroon, V6/3.4L, auto., VOLVO WAGON, 1992: 183 K. condition. $9250/OBO. 802alloy wheels. 34,370 miles.

FWD. 26,874 miles, A/C, PS, PW, ABS, CD. Only 2 VT winters, good 644-5544.

Book: $16,785. Asking: $12,988.

PL, cruise, AM/FM/CD, air bags. condition. All service records, SUBARU LEGACY, 1993, sedan, Call Shearer, 802-658-1212.

Best price, $10,258. Shearer well maintained. Great car for all 164 K. 5-speed, snow and allCHEVY CAVALIER, 1989: Runs Pontiac, 658-1212. seasons. Call 802-899-3389. weather tires incl. FWD. AC, well. Needs some work.

PONTIAC GRAND AM SE VW JETTA, 1994: Black, 4-door, cruise. $700/OBO. Call 802$300/OBO. 802-542-9207 ask for SEDAN, 2005: 4-door, red, v6, 5-speed, sun roof, power every233-8269.

Alaina or leave a message.

3.4 L, FWD, 13,188 miles, thing, 148 K. Took really great SUBARU LEGACY WAGON, CHEVY LUMINA, 1994. Euro AC/AM/FM/CD, sliding sun roof, care of it. Asking $2300/OBO. 1998: Blue, AWD, 107 K, 5edition, needs some work. rear spoiler, cruise, power seat.

802-598-7955. speed, all season radials, A/C, Inspected until December. Runs, $13,474. Call Shearer, 658-1212.

VW JETTA, 2005: IV GLS TDIpower everything, roof rack, new needs TLC. $500. 802-578-3095.

PONTIAC GRAND AM SE platinum gray, 19,500 miles, 5brakes, October inspection.

DODGE NEON, 1997: Red, 130 SEDAN, 2005: Silver, auto, FWD, speed, 40-50 mpg, mint, asking Asking $4800. 802-223-1242.

K, AC,CD, 5-speed manual, runs 25,775 miles, V6, 3.4 L, A/C, $19,500. 802-763-5232, Jim. SUBARU LOYALE, 1993: well, body in good shape, 1 power everything, CD/AM/FM. VW PASSAT, 2000: GLS, 59 K, Station wagon, 2WD, AC and owner. $1500. Leave message for $10,202. Call Shearer, 8025-speed, CD, alloys. $7900. 802great heat, AM/FM stereo and Maura, 802-238-9501.

658-1212.

985-5799. cassette, power steering, excelHONDA ACCORD LX, 1991: PONTIAC SUNFIRE, 2005, lent interior, no rust, $1500. Call Inspected till 6/06. Asking $600. coupe, blue, 4-cyl./2.2L, auto., 802-999-9651.

802-863-7217.

FWD. 15,848 miles, A/C, PS, PW, SUBARU OUTBACK, 2003: HONDA CIVIC LX, 1999: 116 K, PL, cruise, AM/FM/CD, air bags.

CHEVROLET PICKUP, 1995: Legacy wagon, 48 K, auto, car auto, 4 door, CD, power winBest price, $10,997. Call Shearer 1/2 ton, 2-door, 2WD, gas, manstarter, two sets of tires on rims, dows/locks. Winter and summer Pontiac, 802-658-1212. ual, V8, southern truck, no rust! roof rack, cold weather package. tires incl., excellent condition.

PONTIAC VIBE, 2005, sport $3300. 802-899-3056. $16,000. 802-660-3990.

Blue book, $6580. Asking wagon, 4-dr., silvery, 4-cyl./1.8L, CHEVROLET PICKUP S-10, SUBARU OUTBACK WAGON, $5500. Call 802-229-4871. auto., FWD, 18,246 miles, A/C, 1985: Long bed w/cap. 1/2 ton, 1999: 133 K, AWD, auto, silHONDA CR-V EX, 1998: 5PS, PW, PL, cruise, AM/FM/CD, V6, 2WD, 4-speed, PS/PB, 91 K, ver/grey, just inspected. speed, dark green, AWD, power air bags. Best price, $13,997. some rust. $1200. 802-893-7102. $4500/OBO. 802-310-7624. doors/locks, alloys, snowtires on, Call Shearer Pontiac, 802CHEVY SILVERADO, 2000: Red, SUBARU, OUTBACK WAGON, new summer tires incl., roof 658-1212.

4X4, 6 cy., 5-speed manual, 4 2000: 61,500 miles, 5-speed, rack, CD, excellent condition.

SAAB, 1999: 5-speed, 5-door, winters in Ohio, 1 in VT, 79 K, AC, PW, PL, block heater, very $7999. Call 802-225-1322.

108 K, fully loaded, leather, sun highway between Ohio and VT, clean. $11,000. 802-865-6233, HYUNDAI ELANTRA: 4-door, roof, CD, 4 winter tires on steel looks like new, runs great. day, 802-878-8704, evenings. standard. Great mileage, great rims. Book value $7850, asking $7500. Call, 802-276-9990.

SUBARU WAGON, 1997: White, shape. Below book, $4500. Call $7200. 802-223-7330 or 802DODGE, 1998: 3/4 ton pickup, AWD, no rust, 75 K, all season Jim at 802-578-7064.

223-0303. extended cab, 2-wheel drive, radials. 802-985-3911.

ISUZU IMARK, 1988, low 52 K! positraction, 78 K. $4700/OBO. Automatic 4-cyl., 4-dr., white, 802-899-5092. great body condition. Great inteLooking for a SAAB? FORD F250, 1995: Powerstroke rior. 32MPG! Inspected until diesel. 7 1/2’ plow, never plowed click on 10/06. Runs well. Asking commercially. 7.3L, auto, power $500/OBO. Mike, 802-310-3464. everything, cruise. Gooseneck JEEP CHEROKEE, 1992: 200 K, hitch, tow package, cap. $6900. white, great body, snow tires, 802-454-0132. or visit us on Barre-Montpelier Rd • 800.639.4095 • 802.2239580 4WD, needs tune up. $800/OBO. FORD F250, 1999: 7.3L, diesel, Must sell. Contact Jessica at SAAB 9/3, 2000, standard 69 K, auto, 4x4, blue, regular TOYOTA COROLLA, 1989: 5802-355-5265, nights. trans., hunter green. OK condicab. Great condition. $16,500. speed, good condition. 161 K JEEP GRAND CHEROKEE, 2x1-crossways110905.indd 11/7/05 1:31:13 PM sleepy.rip@gmail.com. tion. 109K miles. 1Asking $6000. $750/OBO. Call 802-453-7778, 1993: Runs great, but needs a Contact Brandi at 802-238-7161.

NISSAN, 1996: V6, 4x4, king evenings. new rear differential. I need SAAB 900, 1987, runs great, cab w/cap and bed liner, 156 K, TOYOTA COROLLA, 1993: 5some quick scratch, selling 126K, 5-speed, 4-dr., sun roof, new tires, lots of new parts. speed, 175 K, inspected, runs cheap. 802-863-9896. stereo/tape deck, all-season $2000. Call 802-496-3464. well. $500. 802-878-8768. tires, new battery, new clutch, 2 TOYOTA TACOMA, 1997: owners. Must sell. $800/OBO. Extended cab, black, low miles, 865-9058. $5500. 973-476-9502.

4 trucks

crosswaysaab.com

CARPOOL CONNECTION Save money this winter and join a carpool today!

If you don’t see your route listed here, call 864-CCTA today and we’ll send you a FREE matchlist of commuters in your area.

Colchester to Wintersport Lane, Williston: Looking for ride M-F 8:30am-5pm Ref # 40921 Jericho to Burlington: Looking to carpool M-F 7:30am4pm. Ref # 41156 Marble Island Road in Colchester to Winooski Middle/High: Looking to car-

Call 864-CCTA to respond to a listing or to be listed.

pool M-F 7:30am-3pm. Ref # 41157 Hinesburg to Waterbury: Looking to carpool M-F 7:30am5pm. Ref # 41037 Grand Isle to Waterbury State Complex: M-F 7am4pm. Ref # 91471 South Hero to Kennedy Drive, South Burlington: M-F 8:30am-5pm. Ref # 91467 Commuters interested in starting or joining carpools departing in the morning from the

Grande Isle Ferry Dock to Burlington and returning back in the evening, contact 864CCTA. Montpelier to Burlington: Looking to share the commute M-F 8-5. Ref # 142276 Montpelier to IBM: Looking to share the commute N1, N2 shift. Ref # 142286 Montpelier to South Burlington: Looking to share the commute M-F 12-6pm.

Ref # 142287 Barre or Montpelier to Burlington: Looking to share the commute TWTh 7:45-4:30.

Ref # 142303 Barre to Colchester: Looking to share commute M-F 9am5pm. Ref # 142305 Waterbury to IBM: Looking to share commute M-F 7am-3pm.

Ref # 142306

Montpelier to UHC Burlington: Looking to share commute M-F 7am-3:30pm. Ref # 142316 Waterbury to General Dynamics, Burlington: Looking to share commute M-F 7am-4pm. Ref # 142319 Northfield to Green Mountain Coffee, Waterbury: Looking to share commute Sun-Wed 4:30am-3pm. Ref # 142336 Waitsfield to Montpelier: Looking to share commute M-F 9am-5:30pm. Ref # 142344 Middlesex to Coca Cola, Colchester: Looking to share commute M-F 12pm-9/10pm.

Ref # 142781 South Duxbury to UVM: Looking to share commute M-F 8:30am-5pm. Ref # 142787 Barre to Waterbury: Looking to share commute M-F 6:30am2:45pm. Ref # 142793

TOYOTA, 1991: V6, 4x4, extended cab w/fiberglass cap. Only 45 K on rebuilt motor, minimal rust, lots of new parts, runs great. $3500. Call 802-496-3464.

TOYOTA TACOMA, 2004: Ext. cab, 4x4, blk, auto, tilt, air, cruise, CD/cass., 16” alloys, Rhino liner, split rear windows, tow pkg. 39 K. $17,900. 802999-7125, Kevin.

4 vans

TOYOTA PREVIA VAN, 1995: AWD, great condition, seats 7, dual A/C & heat. Auto everything, roof rack, great in snow. No rust. $3000. Karen, 802-456-1990.

4 motorcycles

HONDA NIGHTHAWK, 1982: 450 cc., runs well, great bike, must sell. $800/OBO. 802-660-9488.

4 suvs

ACURA MDX, 2001: SUV, AWD, loaded, original owner, great condition, 53 K, roof rack, Nokian snows. Reduced to $20,250/OBO. 802-578-9597.

CHEVROLET BLAZER SPORT UTILITY, 2002, Pewter, 4-door, V6/4.3L, auto, 4WD. 39,556 miles. A/C, PS, PW, PL, cruise, AM/FM/cass./CD, air bags, ABS. Best price, $12,992. Shearer Pontiac, 658-1212.

FORD EXPLORER, XLT 2000: 73 K, green, excellent condition, runs like a top, w/mounted snows, all options. Great winter vehicle that needs nothing, just a new owner. $8000. 802-482-4612.

JEEP GRAND CHEROKEE LAREDO, 2005, sport utility, 4 dr., black, V6/3.7L, auto., 4WD, 26,631 miles, A/C, PS, PW, PL, cruise, AM/FM/CD, air bags, ABS. Best price, $18,927. Shearer Pontiac, 658-1212.

NISSAN PATHFINDER, 1993: Red, 180K miles, runs great, 5speed, 4-wheel drive. $300/OBO. Needs a little work. 802-863-9014.

PONTIAC AZTEK SPORT UTILITY, 2003: 4-door, silver, V6, 3.4 liter, auto, FWD, 31,356 miles.

AC, roof rack, AM/FM/CD, power steering/windows/locks, ABS, privacy glass. $12,982. Shearer Pontiac, 658-1212.

4 auto parts

4 NOKIAN HAKKAPELIITTA SUV snows, studded, used 4 months.

P265 70/R16. Fits trucks/SUVs, 4Runner, Tundra, similar. New $600. Asking $200. Call 802-2530870, leave message.

4 STUDDED SNOW TIRES: Nokian Hakkapeliitta, 1 185/65/15. Like new. On 4-lug steel Saab 9000 rims. Paid $450, asking $300. 802-229-0953.

4 WINTER TIRES. Nordman 225/60/16. Excellent condition, used only three months. $275.

Call 802-309-8351.

AUDI ALLOY RIMS. Set of 4, 15”. $75/OBO. 802-888-1196.

FOUR HAKKAPELIITTA 185/65R14 winter tires. Only used 2 seasons. All for $150.

Call 802-865-9708.

Barre to Williston: Looking to share commute M-F 7:30am4pm. Ref # 142800 South Barre to WalMart, Williston: Looking to share commute M-F 9am-5pm. Ref # 142818 Barre City to South Burlington: Looking to share commute M-F 8:30am-5pm. Ref # 142827 Essex Junction to Waterbury Vanpool: Looking for riders M-F 7:30am-4:30pm. Please Ref EJWby Van Starksboro to Burlington: Let’s carpool M-F 7:45am4:30pm. Ref # 10634 Middlebury to Burlington: Looking for carpool MWF 4-9pm.

Ref # 10636 Bristol to Burlington: Let’s share the ride M-F 8am-4pm.

Ref # 10637

5/3/05

Pontiac u Cadillac Hummer www. shearerpontiac.com Local: 802-658-1212 Toll-free: 800-545-8907 1030 Shelburne Rd. So. Burlington FOUR SNOW TIRES and rims.

From a Volvo V70, 1998. Nearly new mounted Hakkapeliitta Q’s size 205/60/R15. New cost, approx. $700. Now $275. Call 802-343-4728.

SET OF FOUR WINTER TIRES. 225/50R16, sport grip, over 75% tread remains. $150. Call Chuck at 802-355-3385.

SNOW TIRES 175/70/R13. Lots of aggressive tread w/3 rims and 4 hubcaps from Honda. $50. Call 802-425-5275.

SNOW TIRES: 4 Cooper, Snow Groove, Weather Master FT2, studded. Size 225-60/16. 2 used only one season, 2 used a few seasons.

Asking $150. 802-578-0420.

SNOW TIRES: 4, like new, P225/75R15, Jeep Goodyear Ultragrip studded. $300/OBO. Call Brad, 802-999-6711.

SNOW TIRES: Hancook 205/70/ 15, used one season on Honda CRV. Excellent tread. Set of 4, $100. Call Euan at 802-861-6486.

SNOW TIRES: Like new mounted and balanced on 16” steel rims.

Call Jamey 802-318-5697.

SNOW TIRES ON RIMS, 21555/R16, for Firebird, Trans Am, Camaro. Goodyear, used one season, $600/original. Sell $225/OBO. 802-264-1953.

SNOW TIRES, P155/80 R13.

Cooper weather-master S/T. Used almost two seasons, on rims or not. $100/OBO. Call 802863-9025.

SNOW TIRES. Used only 1 season. 175/70R13. $60/OBO. Call 802-229-0521, evening, or 802229-2905, day.

4 minivans

DODGE GRAND CARAVAN ES, 1996: 12 K, Seats 7, well equipped, excellent condition, runs great, new tires. Only 1 VT winter. Asking $3450. In Burlington. 802-236-9049.

PONTIAC TRANSPORT, 1997: 71 K. All the extras, seats 8, great condition. $3000, books for $5300. Call 802-865-0409.

4 auto services

ALLOY RIMS UNLIMITED: Refinishing, straightening, new and used, consignment program.

Quality and integrity. 100% guaranteed. Call The Wheel Wizard today. 802-233-3636.

AUTOBAHN BODY WORKS, 4 Berard Drive, South Burlington.

Office, 802-862-0486. Audis, Volvos, AWDs, 5 in stock. Land Rover Discoverys, 3 in stock. VWs: Jetta TDIs, Golf, Passat, 3 in stock.

View our complete inventory at www.autobahnbodyworks. com.

Contact Dan, 802-316-7704, cell.

New Haven to Burlington: Carpool wanted M-F 7:30am4pm. Ref # 10642 Vergennes to Winooski: Looking for carpool 8am4:30pm. Ref # 10649 Bristol to Williston: Carpool desired 7:45am-4:30pm. Ref # 10631 Vergennes to Williston: Looking to share the commute M-F 8am-5:30pm. Ref # 10630 Ferrisburgh to Waterbury: Carpool wanted M-F 7:30am4pm. Ref # 10628

8:4

34B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS

7D HOMEWORKS COUNTRY CAPE

YOUR SAVVY GUIDE TO LOCAL REAL ESTATE

BURLINGTON

PRICE REDUCED

Charming Cape in great condition adjacent to Metcalf Pond on 10.5 acres.Granite floors in the kitchen.Master downstairs & 2 up.Beautiful large bath down with jetted tub & shower.Large deck off the front.Oversized 2 bay garage with attic storage.$199,900

Large family home. 2300 sq. ft., 4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms. Newer kitchen, natural woodwork, built-in cabinets, window benches, fireplace,in-ground pool and detached garage. $355,000

Call Tony Shaw Coldwell Banker Hickok & Boardman Realty 802-846-9580

Call Bill & Phyllis Martin Greentree Real Estate 802-482-5232

SWANTON

NEW

TWO BURLINGTON CONDOS

HUNTINGTON

MONKTON

2800 sq. ft. Contemporary home on 1+ acre. 3 bedrooms, 3 baths, family room, office and studio. Maple floors and cabinets, two car garage and finished walk out basement. $379,900

Cape Style Home - Build package. 1500 sq. ft., 3 bedrooms, 2 baths situated on 2 acres. Can be ready in 14 weeks. Flooring and appliance allowance included.

Large covered front porch. Many other options/variations available. $239,000

Call Bill & Phyllis Martin Greentree Real Estate 802-482-5232

Call Bill & Phyllis Martin Greentree Real Estate 802-482-5232

ESSEX JUNCTION

NEW

New Build.4 miles to exit 20,our Colonial awaits your choices to finish and move in for the Holidays.Meticulously crafted 3BR w/full walk-out basement,gorgeous yard w/river frontage,common acreage in secluded,beautiful setting.Call today. $284,900

Funky, eclectic condos under renovation. 2BR and 3BR , both with new heating, flooring, appliances,W/D, bath fixtures, paint, windows, doors. Close to downtown, lake, bike path. Ready early in 2006. Possible choices of finish to early buyers. Affordable in-city living! $139,900, and $179,900

Beautiful 2BR townhouse in one of the Junction’s best addresses.This is a showplace, and you should see it before you buy - newer appliances, carpet, fresh paint, furnace updated. Near the pool and tennis, too! $189,900

Gracey Conroy Realty Group RE/MAX North Professionals 802-655-3310

Gracey Conroy Realty Group RE/MAX North Professionals 802-655-3310

Gracey Conroy Realty Group RE/MAX North Professionals 802-655-3310

WILLISTON

OPEN HOUSE Sunday, Dec. 18 1-3pm

CHARLOTTE

1850’s village home on 1.77 acre lot. This charming home is large yet cozy. 4 bedrooms, 2 full baths, formal dining room, and 2 living rooms. Other features include hardwood floors, woodburning fireplace, covered porch and small barn. $434,900

Impeccably restored 4,000 sq. ft. brick 1812 Georgianstyle former tavern. 4 fireplaces, 4 + bedrooms 3.5 stories. All historic detailing perfectly reproduced & updated utilities. A separate, newer 2-story garage plus a 1 BR & loft cottage. 32 manicured rolling acres, pond & gardens.

Beautiful 2 bed, 1.5 bath townhouse in desirable Mountain View Estates! Well cared for unit with many improvements including paint, carpet & tile. Gas fireplace in sunken living room overlooking rear deck.

2nd floor laundry. 1-car garage w/ opener.A must see home! $189,900

Call Katherine Krebs RE/MAX North Professionals 655-3333 ext. 216

Foulsham Farms Real Estate 861-7537 www.foulshamfarms.com

Call Gretchen Hidell Prudential Realty Mart

Sell a house.

846-5607 • dreamhomes@gretchenrealtor.net

make it your own.

Why rent when you can own this funky 2BR condo conversion. Being renovated: new heat, windows, appliances, flooring,W/D. A ‘Shoeless Construction’ project, get in quick and help make choices of finish.This flat is close to downtown, lake, and has parking.$149,900 Gracey Conroy Realty Group RE/MAX North Professionals 802-655-3310

SOUTH HERO

Buy a house.

BURLINGTON

YOUR AD HERE!

39%

Nearly of Seven Days readers plan to buy a home in the next year!

To advertise contact Allison Davis 865-1020 x22 • allison@sevendaysvt.com

SEVENDAYS

Find a realtor.

Get a mortgage.

Find a home for your office.

To advertise, please call Allison at 865-1020 x22 or email: allison@sevendaysvt.com

7Dclassifieds.com | SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005

|

7D Classifieds 35B

SPACEFINDER 4 homeshare COLCHESTER: Free rent in exchange for evening and weekend companionship for elderly parent. Females only. Criminal background and ref. req. 802872-5874.

4 housemates

BURLINGTON: House share, 2bedrooms, avail. immed. for M/F/couple on Elm Terrace.

W/D, D/W, basement, storage. $450/mo. incl. utils. Call 802324-8492.

BURLINGTON: Housemate wanted! 2 basement rooms, share kitchen/bath space w/liberal family. New North End/on busline. $375/mo., pay weekly or monthly, no lease. W/D, tons of storage. Call 802-862-4467.

BURLINGTON: Housemate wanted. Looking for prof. to share spacious 3-bedroom apt. downtown. Avail. 1/01. $400/mo. incl. utils. + $400 dep. 802-373-8873.

BURLINGTON: Room avail. in charming 4-bedroom house.

Hdwd, porch, parking, W/D, very large yard, finished basement, lots of space and many plusses.

Looking for relatively quiet and clean roommate. $500/mo. + utils. Avail. 1/01. 802-999-6519.

BURLINGTON: Room for rent in 2-bedroom, 3rd-floor apt. on St. Paul St. Share w/prof. musician.

Avail. immediately. NS/slobs. $425/mo. + utils. 802-363-6847.

BURLINGTON: Roommate wanted for an 18 YO male renting a handicapped-accessible home.

Interests incl. playing video games, being in the community, movies, beta fish and traveling in his Ford van. An ideal match would be a male or mature person or couple. Personal care needed. Contact Marisa Hamilton, 802-865-6173.

BURLINGTON: Share spacious 2-bedroom downtown apt. w/environmentally conscious 31 YO, quiet, hdwd, W/D, parking.

NS/ND. Cats provided, more welcome. 802-922-1349. $400/mo. + utils.

CHARLOTTE: Housemate wanted to share nice lakefront home w/college-age male. 3-bedroom, 1-bath, W/D. Fully furnished.

20 min. to Burlington/ Middlebury. Porches, docks. Need to be music friendly. Pets neg. $700/mo. + utils. Avail. now.

802-425-3104.

COLCHESTER: Room for rent in 2-bedroom, 1-bath cottage w/lake views. W/D, cable TV, deck, parking, shed, close to bike path and lake access. Must like cats. NS/pets $375/mo.

Utils. incl. 802-999-4677.

COLCHESTER: Roommate needed to share apt. w/1 other person. $450/mo. + dep. Incl. cable + heat, W/D. 802-864-9876.

DUXBURY/WATERBURY: Roommate wanted for 3-bedroom house. Quiet, private, views. $450/mo. + utils. 802244-1361.

ESSEX JUNCTION: Housemate wanted. Bedroom and full bathroom on separate floor for privacy. $700/mo. incl. all utils., W/D, home theater, hot tub. Call Travis 802-878-7553.

ESSEX JUNCTION: Prof. college/grad female to share nice home and location. NS/pets. All amenities incl., ample parking and computer use. Avail. now. $450/mo. 802-879-4226.

ESSEX JUNCTION: Single, responsible, dependable, professional, NS/ND/pets. $125/weekly, incl. all. 802-879-1246.

You can afford to own your own home.

Let me show you how Diane Moffatt

Call Diane at 802-764-6000 ext. 238 or Toll Free at 866-535-5390 ext. 238 www.libertyquestmortgage.com

MILTON: Seeking honest housemate to share large 3-bedroom home. $700/mo. incls. all utils.

12 mins. to Burlington. 802355-2096.

SOUTH BURLINGTON: 1 room in 2-bedroom house to share w/prof. couple, quiet, clean. $500/mo. + 1/3 utils. Parking, W/D. 802-318-8147.

SOUTH BURLINGTON: Looking for a responsible housemate to share home off Shelburne Rd. W/D, pool, hot tub, storage, parking, yard. Avail. now. $450/mo. + utils. 802-865-9627.

SOUTH BURLINGTON: Prof. F looking to rent downstairs of large contemporary house, separate entrance, large private family room, bedroom, bath. $700/mo. incl. utils. + cable.

Call 655-5600, after 6 p.m.

SOUTH BURLINGTON: Responsible, NS person to share 2-bedroom apt w/female and cat. D/W, W/D, parking. Pets poss. $450/mo. + 1/2 utils.

413-244-6324.

SOUTH BURLINGTON: Supercool, queer-friendly roommate to share 4-bedroom house, w/trans guy, geriatric Labrador and 3 yr. old kid, part-time. You: laid back, responsible, reasonably neat. Me: Same. Sense of humor, kid-and-dog-friendly a must. $450/mo. +. 802658-6090.

SOUTH STARKSBORO: Beautiful country home, 25 acres.

NS/pets/kids. $500/mo. incl. utils. + dep. 802-453-6677.

ST. ALBANS: Responsible, M/F wanted to share 2-bedroom condo. 1 min. from exit 19. Basement storage. $400/mo. incls. all.

Avail 1/01. 802-999-7125.

WILLISTON: Rent lower level of tri-level townhouse. Two large, partially furnished rooms.

Private bath, shared kitchen, wireless, kids, dog, female preferred. Near Taft Corners/ IBM/I89. NS/ND. $600/mo.

802-879-6962.

WINOOSKI: 1 bedroom in 2-person apt. w/huge kitchen, living room, sun room, dining room.

All w/beautiful hdwd. W/D in unit and new bathroom, offstreet parking. $450/mo. 802999-2374.

4 housing for rent BRISTOL: 3-bedroom, roomy, dogs OK, incl.: parking, plow, trash, water/hot water, heat.

Big yard, good landlord. No laundry or hookups. $945/mo.

David, 802-734-1050.

BRISTOL VILLAGE: 2-bedroom apt, newly painted w/gas heat, NS/pets, off-street parking, basement storage. $700/mo. + utils. Call leasing agent 802453-5841.

BURLINGTON: 1-2 bedroom.

Close to downtown. Cozy and quiet. $675/mo. + utils. Gas heat. Avail. now. No dogs.

862-1148 x102.

BURLINGTON: 1-bedroom, 1bath apt. $750/mo., Main St., off-street parking. Excellent downtown location, nice unit.

Call Jeff at 917-282-5256 or email jeff@wickandmad docks.com.

BURLINGTON: 1-bedroom, downtown apt. Avail. 1/01April, w/option to sign year lease 5/01. Street level, offstreet parking, dining room, sunny living room. $700/mo. + utils. Call 802-578-1157 or 802765-4278.

BURLINGTON: 1-bedroom minihouse, South End. Hdwd. AC, W/D, D/W, driveway, private backyard. NS/pets. Year lease, 1/01. $900/mo. 802-318-5299.

BURLINGTON: 183 No. Willard St., sunny, newly repainted, 1bedroom apt., one-year lease.

NS/pets. $785/mo. + utils. 802658-0621.

BURLINGTON: 2-bedroom, 1.5bath, garage, W/D, pool, tennis, near Oakledge, close to lake/bike trail. Avail. now. $1200/mo. 802-863-6215.

BURLINGTON: 2-bedroom condo, pool, tennis, carport, 2 mins. to bike path/lake, 1 cat OK, W/D. Quiet neighborhood. $1050/mo. 802-849-9354.

Free Pre-Approval!

Mark R. Chaffee (802) 658-5599 x11

BURLINGTON: 2-bedroom, dogs neg. Clean, bright 2nd floor in duplex, new windows and appliances. Short-term lease poss.

Off-street parking. Trash, water, snow removal, yard care incl.

Natural gas heat. Avail. immed. $975/mo. 802-233-1556 or email northernproperty@togeth er.net.

BURLINGTON: 2-bedroom, fullbath townhouse. NS/pets.

Water/rubbish incl. 1-year lease + sec. dep. req. $875/mo. Avail. immediately. Call 802-865-2372.

BURLINGTON: 2-bedroom, newly refurbished, hdwd, high ceilings, funky colors, W/D, storage, front porch, small backyard. $1100/mo. Avail. late Dec. 20 min. walk downtown. 802434-2976.

BURLINGTON: 3-bedroom, 1100 sq. ft., w/2 garage spaces and screened porch. $1250/mo. + elec. Avail. immed. Shelburne Rd. 1 mile south of Main St. 917-547-7500.

BURLINGTON: 3-bedroom, 2bath home for short-term rental.

Pet and furnishings neg. NS. $1300/mo. + utils. 802-249-1279.

BURLINGTON: 3-bedroom apartment downtown Burlington, 56 Peru St. Trash, snow and water included. Offstreet parking space. $1125/mo.

802-658-5547.

BURLINGTON: 3-bedroom apt.

Roomy and in great shape. Ward St. Off-street parking, W/D, gas heat, fenced-in yard. Dogs OK. Avail. 12/1. $1200/mo. David, 802-734-1050.

BURLINGTON: 3-bedroom, avail. 1/01, very nice, spacious, sunny. Incl. trash, snow + water. $975/mo. 802-660-8716.

BURLINGTON: 3-bedroom condo and apt. $950/mo.

Efficiency avail. 1/01, $650/mo. + elec. No dogs. 802-862-7467.

BURLINGTON: 3-bedroom, hdwd, gas heat, parking, yard, W/D. Front and back porches.

Near downtown/UVM/FAHC. No smoking. $1200/mo. Avail. 1/1.

860-1443.

BURLINGTON: 3-bedroom house, 1600 sq. ft., brand new tiled bath, tile in kitchen, 1 car garage. Located off North Ave. Pets OK. $1400/mo. 802343-8194.

BURLINGTON: 3-bedroom, Isham St. Walk to town and university, W/D, parking, storage, 2 porches, avail. 12/05. $1500/mo. + utils., lease +dep.

201-206-8702 or 802-862-8068.

BURLINGTON: 317 North St. 4bedroom house, subletters or full rental. W/D, off-street parking, yard. $470/mo., + utils.

802-310-7894.

BURLINGTON: 4+ bedroom, new renovation, hdwd, W/D hookups, 2nd floor. Avail. now. $1275/mo. Off-street parking.

Section 8 OK, pets neg. 802893-0000.

BURLINGTON: 4-bedroom apt., 1 3/4-bath, some off-street parking, NS. $1400/mo. + dep. + refs. Avail. 12/1. 802-864-1707.

BURLINGTON: 4-bedroom, avail. 2/01. Spacious, parking, hdwd, new tile floors, yard, garden and play structure. Incl. trash, snow + water. $1300/mo.

802-660-8716.

BURLINGTON: 4-bedroom house. Gas heat, large living room w/fireplace. Dining room.

2 baths, parking, W/D. Convenient to UVM/Champlain College. Avail. 1/1 or 2/1. $2000/mo. 860-1443.

BURLINGTON: 99 Adams St., 2bedroom, 2nd floor, off-street parking, NS, gas heat, laundry in basement. $950/mo. +.

Lease + refs. Avail. immed. 802578-8825.

BURLINGTON: Avail. 1/01, large 1-bedroom, 1st floor, hdwd, W/D, off-street parking.

Min. 4-month lease, ref. + credit check, NS/pets. $850/mo. + dep. 802-373-0759.

BURLINGTON: Avail. 1/05, 135 Main St., 1-bedroom, 1-bath, central heat/air, hdwd, W/D, D/W, beautiful downtown apt., views of City Hall park, close to UVM/FAHC. $1200/mo. 802658-9697.

BURLINGTON: Avail. 1/05, 260 College St. #2, 2-bedroom, 1bath, fully furnished, utils. incl., laundry onsite, mo. to mo. rental. $1400/mo. 802-658-9697.

BURLINGTON: Avail. 1/05, 260 College St. #14, 1-bedroom, 1bath, fully furnished, utils. incl., laundry onsite, mo. to mo. rental. $1025/mo. 802-658-9697.

BURLINGTON: Avail. 2/05, 260 College St. #11, 2-bedroom, 1bath, fully furnished, utils. incl., laundry onsite, mo. to mo. rental. $1700/mo. 802-658-9697.

BURLINGTON: Avail. now. 260 College St. #3, 1-bedroom, 1bath, fully furnished, utils. incl., laundry onsite, mo. to mo. rental. $1225/mo. 802-658-9697.

BURLINGTON: Beautiful 2-bedroom, walk to UVM/FAHC. Vaulted skylit ceilings, slate counters, bonus 1/2 room, W/D. Avail. as is for $1100/mo. or w/new LR/BR floors and extended counter for $1250/mo. You choose. Dogs OK w/interview and ref. Avail 1/01. Call 802859-0052.

BURLINGTON: German pharmacist, working at UVM from 02/06 on is searching for a furnished apt./housing up to $700 in Burlington. Please contact karin.wuertz@uni-ulm.de.

BURLINGTON: Great 4-bedroom on amazing Lakeview Terrace.

1-bath, garage, full basement, incredible views of Lake Champlain. Pets OK. Avail. immed. Price neg. 802-2339998, www. lakeviewtr.com.

BURLINGTON: Great location, downtown, 1-bedroom apt. Lots of sunlight, nice building, NS/pets. $710/mo., low utils.

Incl. water/off-street parking.

Call Emily at 802-310-1317.

Attn: UVM Students

NOW LEA SING! SPINNER PLACE, the newest off-campus

housing for UVM students, is now leasing for January 2006!

Apply individually, or with a group, for a two to four bedroom apartment-style suite. All apartments are fully furnished and include utilities, cable and wireless broadband connectivity.

CALL 8 02. 655 .32 0 0 OR VISIT S P INNER P L A CE .CO M BURLINGTON: Bissonette Properties. 1, 2, 3 and 4-bedroom apts for rent. Burlington/ Winooski-area. Avail. immediately. $575-$1300/mo. 864-4449.

BURLINGTON: Bright, open, 1bedroom apt. in historic Vermont House, 131 Main Street.

Great location, quiet place.

Parking, partial heat/AC costs incl. On-site coin-op laundry. $1015/mo. Call Sarah at 802233-0422.

BURLINGTON: Bright, sunny 1bedroom. Nice, big kitchen.

Hdwd, located in old Victorian.

Avail. January. $700/mo. Call for details, 598-6637.

BURLINGTON: Buell St. Avail now, room w/kitchenette. $460/mo. incl. heat, hot water and elec. NS/pets. Neville Companies, Inc. 802-660-3481 x 1021 www.nevilleco.com/resi dence.

BURLINGTON: Church St. Marketplace. Studio apt. Clean, heated. Great location. 802862-2680.

BURLINGTON: Condo, 2-bedroom townhouse on Lakeview Terrace. Beautiful, contemporary, 3-level w/storage, parking, W/D, near bike path, lake views. $1100/mo. 802-893-3507 or 802-373-9999.

BURLINGTON: Downtown, VT house, 2-bedroom, 1.5 bath, beautifully furnished, lake views, incl. utils. NS/pets.

Short-term rental. $1400/mo.

802-660-4832.

BURLINGTON: Immaculate 4bedroom, 2.5-bath Redrocks townhouse. Near everything.

Garage, gas fireplace, W/D, walk to beach. Details and photos at www.mapsalive.com. $1800/mo.

802-496-9108.

BURLINGTON: Large 1-bedroom apt., South End. 5 bright rooms, 1st floor, 2 porches, W/D, plowed off-street parking. $875/mo. + utils. 802-318-1344.

BURLINGTON: Large, 3-bedroom, near FAHC, mint condition, porch, W/D hookups, D/W, parking. $1375/mo. + utils.

802-862-4007.

BURLINGTON: Large 3-bedroom, newly renovated, hdwd, new porch, off-street parking.

Avail. now. $995/mo. Section 8 OK and pets neg. 802-893-0000.

BURLINGTON: Mill St. Avail. now. $1050/mo. incl. hot water.

3-bedroom, dog OK w/ref, WD hookups. Neville Companies, Inc. 802-660-3481, ext. 1021. www.nevilleco.com/residence.

BURLINGTON: Newly carpeted, large 2-bedroom apt., w/living room, eat-in kitchen, partial lake view, large fenced back yard, back deck, W/D, close to downtown/waterfront/bike path, gas heat. Avail. 1/01. $1150/mo. 802-578-3499.

BURLINGTON: Newly remodeled 2-bedroom, 2nd floor, dep. req. $850/mo. Incl. heat. Flex. lease.

Pets neg. Avail. now. Call Jim at 802-578-7064.

Equal Housing Opportunity

All real estate advertising in this newspaper is subject to the Federal Fair Housing Act of 1968 and similar Vermont statutes which make it illegal to advertise any preference, limitations, or discrimination based on race, color, religion, sex, national origin, sexual orientation, age, marital status, handicap, presence of minor children in the family or receipt of public assistance, or an intention to make any such preference, limitation or a discrimination. The newspaper will not knowingly accept any advertising for real estate which is in violation of the law. Our readers are hereby informed that all dwellings advertised in this newspaper are available on an equal opportunity basis. Any home seeker who feels he or she has encountered discrimination should contact the: HUD Office of Fair Housing, 10 Causeway St., Boston, MA 02222-1092, (617) 565-5309. OR Vermont Human Rights Commission, 135 State St., Drawer 33, Montpelier, VT 05633-6301., 800-416-2010 Fax: 802-828-2480

36B | december 14-21, 2005

|

SEVEN DAYS

7D SPACEFINDER for 4 housing rent cont.

BURLINGTON: North and Willard. 2-bedroom. Upstairs.

W/D, parking. No pets. $850/mo. + utils. 372-4890.

BURLINGTON: Pearl St., 2-bedroom, heat incl. Ref. + dep. req. $1025/mo. Parking avail., $25.

Avail. 1/01. 802-862-7372.

BURLINGTON: Pearl Street.

Sunny 2nd floor, 1-bedroom, great location, parking. Avail.

1/1. Rick, 802-864-3430.

BURLINGTON: Small studio, 3 blocks from downtown. Gas heat, coin-op laundry, pergo wood floors and ceramic tile. Very cute, but very small. $490/mo. + utils. 802-324-6593.

BURLINGTON: St. Paul St., 2bedroom, off-street parking, NS/dogs. $775/mo. Avail. 1/1.

802-318-8375 or 802-999-1543.

BURLINGTON: Studio apartment. Great location, very clean.

Incl. parking. Walk to hospital/ downtown. No pets. Avail. now. $600/mo. 802-777-3038.

BURLINGTON: Sunny 1-bedroom, short walk to downtown/ waterfront/bike path, dry storage space, month-to-month lease, pets OK. Avail. 2/01. $725/mo. 802-865-4927.

BURLINGTON: Sunny, 2-bedroom, hdwd, $1050/mo., close to UVM/downtown, off-street parking, trash + water incl. Pets OK. Avail. 1/01. 6 or 12 mo. lease.

Contact Peter, 802-279-6840.

BURLINGTON: Very nice 3-bedroom apt. Remodeled, new appliances, hdwd, W/D, new gas furnace, parking, some storage, porch. Mins. to waterfront/ downtown. $1150/mo. + Avail.

1/1. Sublet or lease through June. 802-363-2620.

CAMBRIDGE: Apt., large L shaped bedroom, dividable. New kitchen, W/D, back yard. Avail now. Utils. incl. Call 802-879-1168.

COLCHESTER: 2-bedroom, 1bath, full basement, W/D hook up, oil/hot water heat. Rural setting, beautiful sunsets. Owner occ. Kennel on property, no pets. $950/mo. 802-872-5874.

COLCHESTER: 2-bedroom lake cottage, deck, big lawn, 10 minutes to Burlington. Avail. now. $975/mo. 802-865-9159.

COLCHESTER: Beautiful 2-bedroom house, W/D, full basement, nice yard, sun room, garage, less than 10 min. to Burlington. $1350/mo. Call 802-655-4583.

COLCHESTER: Great 3-bedroom house, fully-furnished, incl. TVs, plates, etc. Lake view, beach close by, W/D, garage. $900/mo. + . Full ref., dep. + lease req.

NS/pets. Avail. 1/01. Joe 802660-3140, message.

COLCHESTER: Pine Island Rd. Avail now. $1200/mo. 3-bedroom house, 1.5-bath, W/D. Pets OK w/ref. Neville Companies, Inc. 802-660-3481, ext. 1021. www.nevilleco.com/ residence.

COLCHESTER: Two apt Small 1bedroom, great location off Exit 17, clean. $600/mo., avail. now.

Large 2-bedroom, renovated, very nice. Avail. 1/01. $750/mo.

Both incl. water, trash, snow removal. 802-849-6009.

ESSEX JUNCTION: Winter sublet, quiet setting, quality furnishings, immed. occupancy, incl. all utils. $1000/mo.

NS/pets. Refs. req. Please call 802-598-3091.

REAL ESTATE, RENTALS, HOUSEMATES AND MORE

FAIRFAX: Country living 25 MORETOWN: $1400/mo. Sunny, minutes from Burlington. 3-bedspacious, 4+bedrooms, 2-baths, room, 2 full bath, 2001 built on Mad River, gas heat, fireranch on 60 acres of fields, place, laundry hookups, recent woods, streams, and trails. Front 9/12/05 appliances, basement/work 1x1-mortgage-022305 4:18 PM Page 1 loading W/D. Pets neg. Avail. room, large lot, easy access.

12/15. $1200/mo. + utils. 802802-496-3980.

233-2089.

NORTH HERO: Lakefront. 2-bedroom. Quiet, cozy. $800/mo.

657-2642.

Free Pre-Approval! RICHMOND: Furnished house for rent. Cul de sac, 2 bedrooms, porch, storage space, W/D. 1/3Mark R. Chaffee 6/30 ev. longer. Pets welcome.

(802) 658-5599 x11 Call 899-3101.

RICHMOND VILLAGE: 1-bedroom apt. Newly renovated with FAIRFAX/CAMBRIDGE: Large, new appliances, bathroom, unique 2/3-bedroom apt. kitchen and windows. Parking, Cathedral ceilings, post-andcats OK. Avail. now. $700/mo. beam, scenic river frontage. No 802-363-8704.

2x2-Libertyquest080305 11/8/05 8:11 AM Page 1 smoking. Owner-occupied building. Avail. now. $1250/mo. incl. utils. Lease + dep. 802-849-6807.

VERGENNES: 1-bedroom, second floor apt. Close to downtown. Off-street parking. No smoking/pets. $535/mo. + utils., deposit. 985-5478, evenings.

WESTFORD: 2-3 bedroom farmhouse apt., 1200 sq. ft., NS, 10 acre country setting, nice view, enclosed porch. Lease, dep. req. $850/mo. 802-849-6807.

WILLISTON: Quiet 2-bedroom duplex apt. in village. 2nd floor.

Heat incl. NS/pets. Avail. 12/01. $850/mo. + utils. Owner occupied. 802-879-1699.

WINOOSKI: 1-bedroom apt.

Avail. 1/01. Off-street parking, coin-op laundry, new appliances, pets OK. All utils. incl. $800/mo., +/-50. ORC Property Management, 802- 383-5406, email ORC@ilovermont.com.

WINOOSKI: 1-bedroom, avail.

1/05, on quiet street, off-street parking, low utils. Call 802-8658988. NS/pets. $625/mo.

Don’t Trust the Most Important Financial WINOOSKI: 2-bedroom, 2nd Decision of Your Life to Just Anyone floor, dogs neg. Very clean, quiet duplex, new windows, 2 porches, # Low rates that will save hdwd, claw-foot tub/shower, you thousands of dollars new appliances. Off-street parking for 2, NS. Avail. 12/01. # Fast personalized service Short-term lease, $850/mo. 802# Local experience you can trust 233-1556. northernproperty@ together.net.

121 Park Ave. WINOOSKI: 2-bedroom. Avail.

Williston, VT now. Off-street parking, close to FAHC and on busline. Water and garbage removal incl. $850/mo.

802-764-6000 # Toll Free: 866-535-5390 + dep. Call 373-0229. www.libertyquestmortgage.com WINOOSKI: 2-bedroom, sunny, wood floors. Basement storage, HINESBURG: Route 116. Avail.

RICHMOND VILLAGE: W/D. Off-street parking, garden now, 2-bedroom. $810/mo. incl.

Townhouse/duplex, renovated space, gas heat, stove, D/W, heat and hot water. Parking, no Victorian 2-bedroom apt. Incls. microwave. $885/mo. + dep. pets. Neville Companies, Inc. office, sun room, 1-car garage, dvdsmkns@yahoo.com or 802-660-3481, ext. 1021 or large front porch, back yard. DW, 893-4481. www.nevilleco.com/residence.

W/D. Hdwd. Short walk to town.

WINOOSKI: 2-bedroom unit, HUNTINGTON: 2-bedroom 15 mins. to Burlington. $1100/ near Saint Michael’s and I-89. house, bright, spacious, quiet mo. + utils. 802-373-1211.

Easy access to Burlington. Incls. country setting. $1100/mo. + SHELBURNE: Spacious 6-room heat. One cat allowed. $900/mo. utils. + dep. NS/pets. 802apt. avail. immed. 1-bedroom, 802-846-7849.

434-3463.

1-bath, parking. $875/mo. incl.

WINOOSKI: 3-bedroom apt., HUNTINGTON: 3-large bedroom, heat. 802-238-4574 or 518avail. immed. Close to center of 1-bath in duplex. New flooring, 786-1566. town with plenty of parking. deck, and bath. W/D, large priS. BURLINGTON: Spacious 1-bedCats OK. $1050/mo. Call Sarah vate yard w/beautiful mountain room, furnished condo. All new at 802-233-2212 for more info. views. Hike and ski from your floors/carpet. W/D, DW. Avail.

WINOOSKI: 3-bedroom, gas door. N/S, pet OK. $1300/mo. + Jan. 7-June 30. $850/mo. + utils. hot/air, off-street parking, leave, utils. Month-to-month. 802-482No pets/smoking. Incl. trash and dep., application, refs.

5675. plowing. 802-863-6791. $1050/mo., no pets. 802-652JERICHO: Large, studio apt., S. BURLINGTON: Sunny 3-bed9099, anytime. fully furnished, 600 sq. ft., incl. room apt. W/D hookups, heat, WINOOSKI: 3-bedroom house, everything, even Internet, long HW, trash, plowing, lawn, offdogs neg., W/D, roomy, yard, distance phone. 5 min. from Istreet parking incl. $1200/mo. deck, parking. Close to inter89, 18 min. from Burlington.

No dogs. No smoking. Avail. Jan. state/downtown. Very good $1000/mo. 80215, 6-month lease. 862-8664. landlord. Avail. 1/01. Credit 899-3929.

SOUTH BURLINGTON: 2-bedcheck req. $1250/mo. Call David, MILTON: 3-bedroom, 3-bath room, 1.5 bath, townhouse.

802-734-1050. farmhouse, 2-car garage, shortAvail. 1/01. $1100/mo. W/D, WINOOSKI: Avail. now. term lease or month-to-month, D/W, hdwd, carport, pool, patio, Renovated, medium-size, 2-bedNS/pets. $1800/mo. + utils.

NS. 617-833-7816. room, full bath, gas, pkg., no Avail. 1/01. 802-893-6291.

SOUTH BURLINGTON: 2-bedroom pets. $800/mo. 802-862-7467.

MILTON: House on lake, 3-bedtownhouse, end unit, newly reno-9/12/05 sunny 1 3-bedWINOOSKI: 1x1-mortgage-022305 4:18 Large, PM Page room, 2-bath. First, last, dep. vated, new appliances incl. W/D. room, 2 level, convenient locareq. $1800/mo. Jean, 8022-parking spaces. NS. $1050/mo. tion, on bus line, gas heat, off229-1038. + utils. 802-482-5753. street parking. Cats OK, dogs MILTON: Short-term furnished/ neg. $1040/mo. + utils. 802equipped quaint 1-bedroom.

399-9576.

Free Queen bed, full bath. W/D, WINOOSKI: Spacious, sunny, Pre-Approval! satellite TV, heat, power, snow, refurbished 1-2 bedroom. Hdwd, trash/recycling, local phone all on busline, parking provided, Mark R.Chaffee incl. $1000/mo. 802-893-2724. utils. not incl. Cats OK. $825/ (802) 658-5599 x11 MOONLIGHT IN VERMONT: mo. Avail. 1/01. 802-434-6671.

Enjoy it from one of our spacious, upscale houses, condos or apartments in the greater Burlington, Waterbury, SOUTH HERO: Post-and-beam BURLINGTON: Quiet, 28 YO Montpelier area. Choose from home rental, Jan. - May, on the male, seeks reasonably priced more than 70 locations, shortlake. NS/pets. Ref. + sec. dep. room w/one roommate, no stuterm or long, city or rural, 1, 2 req. $1200/mo., heat incl. 802dents. Email ocean_of_ice@hot or 3-bedroom, 1 or 2 baths, 372-4784. mail.com. some w/D/W, W/D, 2-car UNDERHILL: Beautiful 4-bedCOLLEGE TEACHER w/refergarage, streams and acreage. room home on 3-acres of woods, ences looking for living space $650-$1795/mo. Parkside w/flower and berry garden, wood right away Fireplace and quiet Properties, 407 Barre St., stove, claw-foot tub, piano. req. $1000/mo. 802-598-5741.

Montpelier. 802-229-0004.

Avail. 1/01. $1500/mo. + utils.

Month-to-month. 999-7848.

starting at $.35 per word classified@sevendaysvt.com

4 housing wanted

WORKSPACE

4 office space

BURLINGTON: 2 offices/studios avail. w/shared conference room and reception area in beautiful, sunny space in the Maltex Building. Lake views, free parking! 802-864-7756.

BURLINGTON: Desk/office rentals. Single and double office space avail., utils. and secretarial services avail. Free use of conference rooms. 802658-9697.

BURLINGTON: Professional office space located at 95 College St. Avail. 1/01. This ground floor 1000 sq. ft. space incl. a reception area, 4 offices and 1 parking spot. $1500/mo. + heat and elec. Call Charlie for details, 802-864-0538, ext. 236.

BURLINGTON: Waterfront.

Distinctive and unique office/retail space.

Environmentally friendly and affordable. Main Street Landing, Melinda Moulton, 802-864-7999. www.mainstreetlanding.com.

4 real estate services

1x3-ctxmortgageCLASSY

My Loan Officer is

Kim Negron

DOWNTOWN BURLINGTON office space for rent overlooking Church St. Small, private space with shared meeting area, clean, quiet. $200/mo. Contact Greg at 802-864-2372.

WILLISTON: Office available on S. Brownell Rd. 152 square feet. Office includes reception area, kitchen, deck, cable access and ample parking. Three other professional tenants in building.

Great location. Call 860-2211 or 865-6233.

4 space for rent ARTIST/OFFICE/STUDIO space for rent. Join other artists in the same building. Avail. 12/01.

1x2-space 5:54 180 PM Page 1 $250/mo. incl.5/9/05 all utils.

Flynn Ave. Call 802-864-6835, ask for Andy.

y m

9/12/05 4:27NIGHTLY PM Page 1 WEEKLY AND LODGING: European-style and equipped. Kitchen use, cable TV, great ambiance, on bus route. $175-$225/weekly. Maggie’s Inn, 324-7388, 324-3291, or ivan land@aol.com.

4 storage for rent

BURLINGTON: 28 Brookes Ave. Two bay garage with loft.

878-5285.

BURLINGTON: 99 Adams St. Off-street parking $35/mo.

Winter storage in garage $125.

Dec. thru April. 802-578-8825.

4 sublets

802.846.4646 www.KimNegron.com KIM NEGRON, your mortgage professional. Call for a free preapproval. CTX Mortgage, 802-8644646 or www.KimNegron.com.

LIBERTYQUEST is Vermont’s choice for mortgage lending. Our low rates will save you thousands. Let us put our experience to work for you. 802-764-6000, LibertyQuestmortgage.com.

4 room for rent

BURLINGTON: Room for rent on Maple St. Student-aged pref. $400/mo. Call Brooks 802-3630010 or email Biffman66@hot mail.com.

BURLINGTON: Roommate needed, 2 blocks from Church St., $325/mo. incl. all utils. except elec. For more info contact Emily at 802-922-3956.

BURLINGTON: Rooms for rent.

Behind Waterman Hall, UVM. $450/mo. incl. all utils. and parking. Hdwd and incredible location. Sedate environment! cjcc@vt18.com.

BURLINGTON: Large, beautiful furnished house. Mid January June. Walk to UVM/FAHC. 2bath, fireplace, deck, W/D, large yard bordering Centennial Woods. $1200/mo., utils. incl.

Call for details. 802-864-7397.

BURLINGTON: Subletter needed Jan. - May. 2-bedroom. $450/ mo. + utils. Top of Buell St. 5 min. walk to downtown or campus. Girl preferred. Contact Marla at 802-343-6969.

BURLINGTON: Subletters needed from Jan. - May. 3 rooms avail. Great location, top of College St. $450/mo. + utils.

W/D, off-street parking. Price neg. 315-481-6979.

SUBLET NEEDED: 28 Brooks Ave. #1. $450/mo. + H20. Off-street parking, laundry, close to UVM. Call Tracie at 802-598-7845.

WINOOSKI: One room available in 3-bedroom apt. Top floor of Woolen Mill. Close to UVM/St. Mike’s. Avail. January-June ‘06. $492/mo. + water. 857-991-0751.

SEVEN DAYS Legals

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7Dclassifieds.com | SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005

â&#x20AC;&#x153;I like supporting another locally owned business. Seven Days is the best way to reach our customers in print. The combination of local interest and investigative reporting attracts readers who shop in our store. We could advertise in a variety of publications locally, but we use Seven Days because it delivers our customers.â&#x20AC;?

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m

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| december

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SEVEN DAYS

>> PLACE ONE FOR FREE

love: ªªªª

46 YO, DPF, NS, LIGHT DRINKER, PETITE, attractive, honest, kind, creative. Seeking NS, light drinker, SWM, 42-52 YO, who is employed, has sound mind, healthy body and values honesty, respect, communication, gardening, boats, hikes, arts. For friendship, possibly LTR. 1050

looking for

what’s

that?

A B BI C CU CD D F F2M FF G H ISO J L LTR M MA M2F N ND NS NA P Q S TS W WI YO

ASIAN BLACK BISEXUAL CHRISTIAN COUPLE CROSS DRESSER DIVORCED FEMALE FEMALE-TO-MALE FULL-FIGURED GAY HISPANIC IN SEARCH OF JEWISH LATINO/A LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIP MALE MARRIED MALE-TO-FEMALE NATIVE AMERICAN NO DRUGS NON-SMOKING NO ALCOHOL PROFESSIONAL QUEER SINGLE TRANSSEXUAL WHITE WIDOWED YEARS OLD

women > men

ARTISTIC, MUSICAL VEGETARIAN, 19 YO, SWF student enjoys Tolkien, origami, crayons, and gaming. Looking for likeminded indie boy for spontaneous adventures, concerts, coffee, cuddling. Musical and artistic talent a plus. 1163

WILD HEARTS CAN BE BROKEN. TOUSLED and tossed, award-winning virtuoso WPF, 39 YO, looking for a kindhearted M, 3550 YO, to shower w/love and lust. Sky diving a plus. 1041

CUTE 19 YO SWF STUDENT LOOKING FOR indie boy to share concerts, coffee, cuddling, and frolicking in snow. Shaggy hair and nerd glasses a plus. 1162

CEREBRAL/PLAYFUL, MODERATELY unconventional, irreverent, progressive iconoclast, finely aged, NS. Would like to meet bluegrass to baroque muse-ical guy w/grassroots social conscience, shared values, and compatible pheromones: 50s(?), finely aged, NS. Welcome the warmth of winter. 9985

SWF 28 YO FF, 5’7, BLUE, DIRTY BLONDE. ISO 23-40 YO, SM who enjoys movies, someone who has the qualities as I do.

Loving, honest, faithful, no head games, caring, ISO of a LTR. 1156

DATE MY MOM! 54 YO, BUT LOOKS FAR younger, DPF, active in the community, loves to be outside, run/bike/hike/ski.

Very genuine, kind, fun and understanding. Deserves a great guy! Looking for active, honest, happy M. Calls screened.

9983

CARPE DIEM IS MY STYLE. FINALLY A life in balance I’d love to share w/a 55+ guy who also wants an honest, kind connection, simple pleasures, ongoing exploration, music in the air, friendship and love. 1155

50 YO DWF, FULL OF CONTRADICTIONS that seem to work: complex/simple, talkative/shy, out-there/grounded, private/open, homebody/loves to travel and explore, self-secure/unsure about dating again, independent but liked sharing my life with someone. Please NS. 9967

SWPF, 118 LBS. 5’3. PHYSICALLY AND emotionally fit. Appreciates good communication and conversation. Interests are biking, movies, plays, travel, dining out or relaxing at home. Hoping to share w/a 48-58 YO M w/the same interests. 1141 STUD MUFFIN WANTED FOR POTENTIAL LTR. Looking to meet SWM, 6’2 or taller, 26-38 YO. Must be emotionally, financially secure and know how to treat a woman. Me: SWF, 25 YO, 5’11, blue eyes, brown hair from Burlington area. 1140

IS THIS THING ON? WE ARE OUTGOING, fun-loving, open-minded and affectionate. I’m beautiful, full-figured 28 YO F who loves music, movies and the company of good people. You’re chivalrous, funny and kind. Let’s make each other happy. 9964

WPF SEEKS LTR. BBW, AND LOSING weight, intelligent, employed, NS, social drinker (ok), cat person a +. Looking for same, call me. Give/get respect. 1124

1 Confidential Information

WITH HUMILITY OF MIND AND TENDERness of heart, SBF, 40ish, ISO SBM over 35 YO. It would take more than 40 words to describe what I desire in you, so if you fit the description, next step is on you. 9951

LOOKIN’ FOR A TORMENTED SOUL. I’M fun and loving w/a darker edge. I’m sensual, into tantra. Enjoy walking through graveyards, writing poetry, late nights.

ISO someone who isn’t egotistical, has a sense of humor, won’t try to change me, just complete me. 9840

SWPF, NS, 47 YO. CAT WOMAN, BUT NOT crazy. Nice lady, intelligent, zaftig, indeSWF 28 YO SEEKS M 28-35 YO. MUST pendent. ISO employed, NS gentleman, like kids. I am fun, caring, honest, out38 YO - early 50s for companionship, perdoorsy and a cuddler. Like movies, music, 1x1-PPNNE062205 6/20/05 12:29 PM Page 1 haps more. Please also like wine, firetrying new things, looking for LTR. 9835 sides, good food, seashores, sunning, SINGLE ADS ARE CHEESY! BUT I DO NOT books, movies and quiet times. 9905 want to be single forever, so, S mom, 24, down-to-earth, organic, natural lifestyle.

Love outdoors, romantic, fun to be around! Friends first with hopes for LTR. Let’s get some joe. 9775

38 YO F, WARM, CARING, LOVES COUNTRY living, soft music, camping. Specifically seeking very tall, black-haired, well-built M w/good old-fashioned morals. A gentleman who won’t rush me. Believe me, I am for real. Where are you? 9877 SWF, ISO SWM W/SENSE OF HUMOR WHO can take life’s troubles w/a grain of salt.

My Grandmother did and she lived to be 91! Let’s follow her example. Call me.

9873 IMAGINE JOY! LET’S LIVE IT. IMAGINE love! Let’s be it. Creative, intuitive, youthful, fit, attractive, NS, vegetarian, SWF, following her own heart song seeks divine connection w/NS, SM, 50s-60s age range for heavenly bliss and down-toearth companionship. 9871

SWF 49 YRS. YOUNG, PLUS-SIZED BUT losing weekly. Seeks sweet-natured, honest and humorous SWM, aged 45-55. No head games, no rushing for love, but rather companionship with a like-minded soul who is tired of being alone, too.

9756 SWF, 37 YO IN NEED OF ATTENTION, lacking greater things in life. Need to be shown how to show affection. I can give it if you can show me the way. 9752 KINKY FANTASY. I AM LOOKING FOR open-minded men 18-40 YO in the Barre area. I want to watch my boyfriend give oral to another man. Serious only. Leave name, number and description. He is a naughty boy! 9744

SEVEN DAYS

54 YO WSF, NS, OUTGOING, RETIRED, enjoys hiking, biking, xc skiing, travel, volunteer work, horseback riding, have a cat, snowmobiling, motorcycling, volleyball. Looking for friendship first. 9960

SEEKING A MENSCH OVER 50 WHO HAS collected some of life’s wounds and wisdoms, left of center, but not off-balance, word and/or plant and/or wordsmith, good mind, good humor. In good working order, good grief! 1055

PERSONALSUBMISSION

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Dear Lola, Having grown up in a family of screamers and hitters, I learned early on that pitching a fit only exacerbates bad situations. As an adult, I’ve always taken great pride in my ability to maintain my cool. The other day, though, something happened at work that just set me off. I blew up, and when I got home I started venting at my husband — which I never do. Before I knew it, we were making passionate love on the living room floor. (Thank God the kids were at a movie!) I’ve been sexually active for nearly 20 years and have never experienced such an incredible orgasm! Now I feel guilty. Is it sick to get off on anger like that?

Startled in Starksboro Dear Startled, It wasn’t the anger that did it — it was the intensity of emotion. You can’t pick your passion. Dial down the wrath — or the grief, or whatever — and you mute the whole shebang, including joy, love and sexual response. Did anything bad happen at work after you blew up? If not, it might be time to relegate those old lessons to the past and start feeling more of what you’re feeling.

Love, Lola

REACH OUT TO LOLA... c/o SEVEN DAYS, P.O. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402 lola@sevendaysvt.com

SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005| 7D personals 39B

men > women WIWM, 50 YO, SEEKS MATURE F. HONESTY is only requirement. Pretty, gray hair a +.

1160 A CHRISTMAS GIFT TO YOU. SM, 5’9, NS, mid-aged, kind, caring, romantic, runner, hiker, loves folk guitar, children, books, nature. Dreams the impossible dream: to meet you, to get published, to share love w/you. A 1:2713er. 1159 SWPM ISO HELP. AGE OF DUMB. BOOKS archaic, music loud, cell phones everywhere. Parties? Laugh at nothing. Need conversation, unpredictability, raucous humor. Please be adult, 30-50 YO, attractive, bold. For? That’s the question. 1154 DWM 47 YO 5’10, 150 LBS., FIT, WITTY, romantic, liberal, gentle, devoted, naughty, outdoorsy, average-good looks.

Wants to be in love again w/fit soulmate.

Do you like garden dirt, blue jeans, painted nails, lingerie, laughing, cuddling, movies, Chinese food? 1153 50 YO M SEEKS F FOR FUN AND EXCITEment. Mission: to revisit 60’s and 70’s.

Prefer ND/NS/NA. But will be duly considerate. Activity to include sober partying, excursions, dancing, dining out or simple companionship. 1151 25 YO, SWM ISO AN OLDER WOMAN. She has to be fairly good-looking and well off. I want her to take care of me and I’ll be her slave. I’m handsome, no habits. 1133 CHEATING WIFE HAS LEFT THIS FATHER of 2 heartbroken and lonely. Looking for SWF, 26-35 YO, who is old-fashioned honest and loves a hopeless romantic. Hardworking gentleman looking forward to dating and that beautiful first kiss! 1132 SUGAR MAGNOLIA, BLOSSOMS BLOOMing... Easygoing, affectionate, healthconscious, NS, 40 YO, DWM. Likes cooking, concerts, animals, gardening, massage giving/receiving, travel, sailing, classic rock, bluegrass, GD, Blues. Seeks kind, easygoing, natural beauty w/similar interests. Let’s hook up. 1123 TRYING SOMETHING NEW, SW FATHER, musician, reserved but not shy, enjoys music, outdoors, 34 YO, fit and healthy, looking for NS, SWF, 30-34 YO, to share adventures or quiet times. North of Burlington. 1060 18 YO, 420-FRIENDLY, MUSIC-LOVING, chill guy. ISO 18-21 YO outgoing, sweet girl who’s very open-minded in Addison area. I will listen and treat you like the sweetest girl on the planet. 1058

I SAW YOU WHILE I WAS DREAMING AND felt so close to you. I awoke wondering if you were waking, too. Oh, it was so real.

SM at the crossroads seeks SF w/leopard skin pill box hat. 1048

SWM, 48 YO, D/D-FREE, TALL, SLIM, athletic, fit, multi-interests in the arts, sports and social activism. ISO single, attractive, healthy, fit, NS, D/D-free, any race, 30-55 YO F for casual or LTR. 9956

SWM, A TRUE ROMANTIC. GOOD JOB, have my own money. Work out daily, great shape. Looking for SF, 25-35 YO for dinner and LTR. No games, and should be in good shape. 1047

DWM, 50 YO YOUTHFUL, LONGHAIRED, very clean, health-concious, 5’8, 155 lbs.

From rural Maine. ISO warm, willing, F for mutually satisfying times, from message exchange, sexual thrills or companionship. Whatever we are comfortable with.

35-60 YO, race unimportant. 9949

ZOOM, ZOOM, ZOOM! LET’S MOTORCYCLE upon the roads less traveled. SPM, financially, emotionally secure, college grad., active and fit. ISO SF, 33-43 YO to share meaningful conversation, fine wine, swimming, hiking, scuba diving, trips to Montréal, your interests, possible LTR. 1046 SWM, 23 YO, TALL AND THIN, ATTRACtive, organic, calm, musician/singer, massage therapist seeks sexy and wise female 18-25 YO for cuddling, reading, lovemaking, being ridiculous, dancing. Call and we’ll have tea somewhere. 1040 HIP, SMART, FUNNY, GOOD-LOOKING, prof. M, 53 YO, seeks woman, 30-50 YO, for conversation, music, travel, skiing, margaritas, thumb-wrestling (and other sports). Joy, happiness, adventure and sex can happen! Extra credit for playing a musical instrument. 1039 SWM SEEKING A WOMAN TO HELP THIS 37 YO wake up to new adventures, fresh air, long walks, and cuddling on these VT nights! Old-fashioned, and yes, I believe, there’s a God! 1036 SWM, 24 YO, LOOKING FOR A GIRL WHO knows what she wants and wants to have fun with it. I am an adventurer. Couch potatoes need not apply! Get at me and find out how fun life can be! 1033 SWM, 38 YO, HANDSOME M LOOKING TO meet a nice lady between 24-42 YO for LTR. Start out as friends and then see. I am 5’7, 165 lbs., blue eyes, brown hair.

9994 WPM, HERE FOR A YEAR, ISO ARRANGEment w/adventurous lady or ladies on casual or occasional basis. CD w/toys and desire to fulfill, willing and wild. All calls will be answered. Montpelier area. 9991 SWM, 50 YO, ISO SAF, 35-50 YO, TO enjoy life with. Secure, home, outdoors man, easygoing, caring, honest, hate abusive people. ISO lady to cuddle by fire with, must be caring and enjoy life.

Possible LTR. 9972 61 YO M SEEKING LTR W/SOPHISTICATED 50-60 YO lady. Must enjoy walks, bike rides, dinners, movies, rides in the country and home time. 9961

SWM LOOKING FOR SWF, 30-50 YO WHO enjoys a lot of TLC. I love to walk, cuddle, dance. Trustworthy, honest, no head games. Seeking SWF w/same interests who loves to be pampered. 9880 HOLIDAYS ALONE? ME, TOO. SWM, 43 YO, smoker. Aged well. ISO F, 30-52 YO who enjoys music, dancing, Nascar, good food and drink, is outgoing, likes herself and looking for romance, passion and LTR. Much more. 9872 HEY Y’ALL. I’M LOOKING FOR A REDNECK woman, not no high-class broad. Don’t want no Barbie-doll type. Got a baby on your hip, that’s all right w/me. Here’s to all the redneck girls. Hell, ya! Me: 42 YO, SWM. 9870 NEARLY 40 YO SWM WOULD LIKE TO meet you in person or at least by phone.

Like to hike, cross-country ski, music, writing, cats, cooking and children. Wish to sit and talk. 9837 SKI, SNOWSHOE, HIKE W/HONEST, FIT, humorous, intelligent, financially secure SPM. Seeking adventurous, active, funloving SF, 35-45 YO to share meaningful conversation, fine wine, traveling, dining out and home-cooked meals w/romantic, confident animal lover. Friendship first, possible LTR. 9787 TRAVEL MATE DESIRED. SEEKING FUN partner to explore life. 40 YO, in good shape, reasonably attractive and fun to be with. Into most anything and openminded. Call for more info. 9786 SM, 45 YO, MENTALLY DISABLED, LOOKing for F companion, and LTR, 25-45 YO to go camping, spending time outdoors, adventurous, love children. Looking to settle down, romantic nights, cuddling and more. Please NS/NA/ND. 9784 WM 50 YO, ISO NS, W, 40-50 YO. WANT someone to give you some true affection and tenderness, not just a one-night stand? Try me. 9779

POLITICALLY CONSCIOUS, REPORTEDLY attractive, allegedly thoughtful 48 YO DM, with love for music, art, country life, parenting, subversive humor, mountain sports, travel and bicycles, ISO secure, fit, intellectually stimulated granola muncher who can both offer and welcome challenge. 9774 STABLE, CARING, SUCCESSFUL, GOODlooking M 27 YO seeks companionship w/single F, possibly marriage. 5’7, 152 lbs, outdoorsy, athletic, open-minded and interested to try new things. 9776 OPTIMISTIC ROMANTIC: WHY DO ALL these ads sound the same? DWM 31, 5’6”, 160 lbs. Anyone can try to buy someone’s love, but “Just because, little things” from the heart mean the most. Agree?

Then let’s talk! Friends into LTR??? 9768 SWM, 44 N/S: IF YOU’RE READING THIS and your intuition is talking to you, please call. My favorite things: Outdoor play, campfire singing, cuddles and pillow talk, exploring, dancing, learning, honesty, friends, critters, woods, water, silence, Stevie Wonder. Seeking LTR. 9760 SWM, 35 YO, 6’, BLACK HAIR W/BLUE eyes. Very outgoing, great sense of humor, love to joke around, quiet nights at home, long walks and drives. Love to cuddle, all types of outdoor activities and music. ISO SWF w/similar interests. 9757 INTELLIGENT, SLIM, ATTRACTIVE PWM, NS, 40ish, seeking pretty, demure, discreet lady 18-30 YO who enjoys being diapered and babied as much as I do. I will be your daddy if you will be my mommy. Interested? Let’s talk. 9750 6’, 53 YO. LOOKING FOR A WOMAN, 4053 YO, 110-160 lbs. All calls will be answered. 9748

60 + WOMAN, 64 YO, ACTIVE, ATTRACTIVE, emotionally and physically healthy, seeks friendship, w/spiritually grounded, gentle, vibrant, S/NS, M. 1158 DWF, 65 YO, SMUGGS-AREA BEAUTY. NS/NS/ND. ISO vital DM, 65ish. Ski w/”grand ones.” Solo traveler. Take Grand Canyon mule ride? Dancer. “Haven home” sharing and a legacy fossil project.

Creative problem solver. Not “rager” type.

Life-focused very valued. 1049

ISO SF, 19-30 YO FOR FUN TIMES. Honest, trustworthy a must. Movies, walks, talking and cuddling. Just be real and honest. Me, 5’11, 24 YO, hazel eyes, and very kind. 9777

Jolie Did you know that Jolie means pretty in French? Well, it’s a perfect name for me because I am a pretty, 22-month-old, spayed female Lab mix. I am cute, sweet, and eager to learn. I am housetrained and affectionate. I am also a playful, rambunctious, excitable, and energetic young lady. I get along with other dogs and according to my previous people am cratetrained. Wow! I’ve got a lot of great qualities.

Though my previous people said that I was good with visiting children, at HSCC I have shown that I may growl or snap over my food bowl so it would best if I found a family with adults only or with kids 13 and up. Reward-based training would be a great way for me and my new folks to bond and for me to learn good doggie manners. Since I am a ‘Diamond in the Ruff’ this is highly recommended for me to be successful. Boy, won’t it be fun to go for walks and play fetch?

Visit me at HSCC, 142 Kindness Court, South Burlington, Tuesday through Friday, from 1 to 6 pm or Saturday from 10 am to 4 pm.

862-0135.

women > women ATHLETIC, 22 YO TOMBOY, 5’2 W/ HAZEL eyes and short, light brown hair. Very outgoing, fun, open-minded and romantic, who enjoys movies, music and animal lover. Seeking 18-25 YO, SGF, reasonably attractive, fun, romantic, outgoing, NS/ND. I have a big heart and I need more than kitty to fill it. LTR. 1157 33 YO ATTRACTIVE F ISO ATTRACTIVE F, femme or soft butch, 25-45 YO. LTR, spend time with. I am a fun-loving woman w/many qualities. I’m very active.

If you’re ready for the trip of a lifetime then we must chat! 9959 NS, ACTIVE 53 YO WGFP ISO F TO LEARN, teach and grow with. Retirement just ahead, possibilities are endless. Meet for coffee or wine. Friendship first. 9783

NAUGHTY LOCAL GIRLS WANT TO CONNECT WITH YOU

69¢ per minute

1-888-420-BABE 1-900-772-6000 23 YO SELF-CONFIDENT, ATTRACTIVE F ISO fun, attractive F to share time with.

I’m outgoing w/a lot of energy and looking for similar. 9766

men > men GWM, 30 YO, GOOD LOOKING, CLEANcut. Seeking nice, honest, guy w/a sense of humor. I believe in love and haven’t found it. Please help! If you are a lover, not a player, call this ad! 1127 59 YO, GWM SEEKING GM FOR LTR. AGE, looks not important. Looking for roomie to move in w/and share expenses and bed. I’m 5’9, 200 lbs, clean, discreet. If this is what you are looking for, let’s talk. 1062 GWM, 45 YO, 5’7, 160 LBS. LIMBER, long lasting, likes affection. ISO same type of M for passionate overnight interludes. French kissing a must. Versatile is a plus. Don’t be shy, all responses taken seriously. 1043 G/H/M LOOKING FOR MEN WHO ARE straight or bi-curious. Race is not a problem. I’m always looking for a new experience. Who knows what may come of it?

Let’s get together if you dare. 9990

men > women 34b >>

Humane Society of Chittenden County

sponsored by SEVEN DAYS

w w w . c h i t t e n d e n h u m a n e . o r g

40B | december 14-21, 2005

|

SEVEN DAYS

>> PLACE ONE FOR FREE 35 YO BIM, 5’8”, 225 LBS, LOOKING for discreet daytime fun in central VT. Very oral, likes to give and receive.

Looking for BI or GM. Age, race, size not important. 9958

BI-CURIOUS M ISO 18-50 YO M IN NEED of oral relief. Love to please. Very discreet. You be d/d free and ready to have a great sexual time. No reciprocation necessary, just lay back and enjoy. 9993

WHAT MEASURES THE BREADTH AND depth of “the gay man in character?”

Brown eyes, 6’3, into the arts, humor a must. Will respond back to those who write or call — in the end, it’s reaching out that matters most, in my opinion!

9941

WIFE/GIRLFRIEND NOT DOING THE “JOB”?

Attractive guy, 30s, seeking guys 18-48 YO, 6’+ not overweight, who need to receive hot bjs. Nice guy here, private house, privacy assured, willin’ to travel, so call. 9976

BIWM, 40S, LOOKING FOR BI/G M, 1835 YO for winter fun in and out of bed.

Clean, NS, you too. 9933 TENDER, ROMANTIC TOP SEEKS BEAUTIful, young bottom. I’m a masculine, fit and attractive 32 YO who’s totally into fulfilling the needs, wants and desires of a passionate, young (20s) prince. First timers, bi-curious welcome. Explore your wild side. Call now. 9930 BIWM, 32 YO, 5’9, 170 LBS, ATTRACTIVE, clean and very discreet. Into oral or like to use my butt w/the right guy. You: cute, in shape, gotta boyfriend. My fantasy if a threesome. Call me. 9928 BIM ISO WELL-ENDOWED M, 40 YO OR younger and in shape. I’m sincere and discreet, also slim. I will be your slave boy to please you as you want. Just call and leave name and number. Will answer all. 9878 HEALTHY, GOOD-LOOKING, FIT 29 YO on the d/l dude looking for a similar buddy. B and H encouraged to respond.

Be on the d/l, healthy, fit and be cool.

Champlain Valley only. Let’s chill. 9848 COLD FEET? GWM 52 YO, 5’9, 175 LBS, seeks 18 YO + GWM who needs warmhearted, loving, caring, masculine male who can offer you laughter, belonging and a special place in his heart. Be honest. ND/NA. 9749

bi seeking ?

STRAIGHT-ACTING 34 YO BIWM ISO same. Never had a “relationship” w/M, but curious to find the right one to turn me on. 1147

just friends I WANT TO PRACTICE GERMAN AND MEET adventurous people to share outdoor adventures. 1134 SWF, 49 YO, LOOKING FOR F COMPANion(s), not a lesbian relationship, strictly platonic. Interested in sharing and talking about books, TV, movies, dating experiences, cooking, life experiences/ adventures, shopping, expand our social circles.

Must be smart but not pompous, have a good sense of humor, fun, supportive, caring. Mentor, friend. Laverne and Shirley, Lucy and Ethel, Golden Girls.

9992

couples seeking...

MACU LOOKING FOR F FOR FUN AND friendship. Not looking for just a onetime thing. If you’re interested in learning more, please leave me a message.

1059 ARE YOU LOOKING FOR ADVENTURE AND fun? So are we! MACU seeks BIM/F or CU for adult gatherings. ND. Light drinkers OK. Age, size and race not an issue. Fun and safe. Discretion is a must. 1054 WCU ISO BIF OR CU W/BIF TO ENJOY the pleasure of sensual dining out and the exotic pleasure of watching a CU explore their tactile menu. 35 YO +. 1051 ATTRACTIVE, EROTIC, CU SEEKING SEXY, BI-curious SF, to engage in our first-time threesome. Call if you would like to meet.

We are discreet, so must you be. 9980 FRED AND BETTY SEEK WILMA. SENSE OF humor a must, bad habits a +, Burlington beauty fit to be tried? Sorry Barney, 3’s company. Ya ba da ba do. 9953 ATHLETIC COUPLE WILL ENTERTAIN YOU. Lots of fun for the open-minded. Singles or couples or more! 9754

SEVEN DAYS

women seeking...

SWF, 25 YO, STRAWBERRY BLONDE, blue-green eyes looking for a SBM for sexual fun. Must be 26-38 YO, single, D/D free, 8”+, willing to please and considerate. 9988 25 YO SWF WHO UNDERSTANDS THE sexual needs of a man should be met by an intimately generous, knowledgeable, attractive, nicely built woman. Looking for casual relationship(s) with successful men who enjoy using their means to reciprocate nice experiences. 9772

men seeking...

SWM, 39 YO, MEDIUM HEIGHT/BUILD, ISO fun, submissive F, fun and games.

420 OK. Race not important. 1161 HAVE YOU BEEN A NAUGHTY GIRL? DO you need a good spanking to get off?

This 48 YO dominant M can lend you a hand. I can put that reddish rose color back in your cheeks. 1135 SW, 30’S, IN SHAPE, SEEKS TO ORALLY satisfy married or SF, D/D free, no strings, very discreet, give me a call. You will not be disappointed. 1053 MARRIED MALE SEEKING COMPANIONship from M or F. The wife won’t put out and I am ready to explore. Want to try oral, maybe more. 18-35 YO. 1038 EXPERIENCED, SEXY, LOVING, CARING M, 36 YO. Looking for wild times w/younger F into sharing in consensual bondage games. Require adventurous spirit, discretion, no STDs, ND. Bring fantasies, desires. So much life, trust, respect to share w/lovely vixen. 9971 MAWM, 50 YO, SEEKS F FOR FUN AND adult fun. Must be clean and discreet.

Expect same. Average guy. Looking for good times. 9954 TWO WPM SEEKING ADVENTURESOME F for casual 3-way rendezvous. Discreet, respectful, fun. No STDs, good self-image, nice body. 9887 BURLINGTON-AREA WIDOWER SEEKING sexual companionship from either sex.

Not into anal sex but willing to offer penetration or oral satisfaction. 9847 25 YO, GREAT SHAPE ISO BI F, 25-35 YO. Want to put spice back in your life?

Love to give. Asian-American a +. 9844

www.7Dpersonals.com

ISO MA/S F PROF. OR NOT. RICH F NEEDING attention. I am a 40 YO male, very discreet w/no strings. 9785 RUGGED, BEARDED, HAIRY-CHESTED, muscular type of guy? Tool belt strapped on, all charged up and no place to go?

MA 43 YO BI, 5’9, 129 lbs, can help you drain your battery. Private camp between Middlebury and Burlington. 9780 DOMINANT MALE SEEKS SUBMISSIVE females for OTK and like action. SDWM makes no difference. Average looks and body A+. Will respect limits. 9788 DOMINANT MALE SEEKS SUBMISSIVE females for OTK and like action. SDWM makes no difference. Average looks and body A+. Will respect limits. 9788 LADIES: ARE YOU GETTING ALL THE sexual attention you deserve? WM, 45 YO, tall, slender, attractive, well-hung, excellent lover w/ 30 yrs. experience, offering no-strings sexual skills. You: F, slender to medium build, 21+. Call, I could be your tool. 9789 TRIM, 6’, BLONDE DWM SEEKING SUGAR mama who wishes to lead a submissive lifestyle. Be 25-55 YO, pretty, in decent shape, ready to enjoy letting go. Discreet and fun. 9755 GOT LIBIDO? HORMONALLY CHALLENGED 50 YO MAM, 5’8, 155 lbs, seeks similar F, 35-60 YO for horizontal fun, no strings.

You bring humor, friendship, discretion and a desire to play. FF OK. 9709

i spy YOUR ROOMIE FIFTY TOLD US “WE’RE going to party like it’s .37 birthday!”

Happy birthday to our favorite postman.

Shots on us. Stamp it! 1152 YOU CALLED ME GREEN SHOES AND accused me of following you on 12/8 after lunch. I guess you must really have needed your groceries, because you ran away so fast. I wish you hadn’t. Blue Eyes. 1150 PORCHETTA, THANKS FOR HOLDING THE corners through Chianti, your breath in Venice, and the door in Roma. I remain yours and Cleopold’s beholden poet, Mario. 1149 TO THE GORGEOUS BLONDE WHO HAS amazing taste and a killer smile. I loved your style and the haircut you gave me.

Hope you have/had an awesome birthday!

Reading is fun. 1148 TAMMY, I MISS YOUR COUSCOUS. LET’S have dinner and a movie. Your partner.

1146

12/4 TO THE MEAN MAN AT STOWE ON Sunrise run who skied by and called me a “dumbass” ‘cause he thought I was sitting and blocking the trail... I fell! You should think before you yell next time!

1145 TO THE BEST KITTY MOMMY IN THE world. Can’t wait to snuggle under the tree w/you and eat canned cat food.

Meowy Christmas! Luv, Petu and Isis.

1144 I SPY MY BEST FRIEND AND THE ONE I love. Thank you for the last 6 wonderful years. Things can be the way they used to be, but my heart still feels that it could be much better...no regrets. 1143 TO MY FAVORITE CITY FAN: HAPPY BIRTHday, happy anniversary, Merry Christmas!

Thanks for indulging me by leaving Oz for BVT. Love you, CTID. 1142 LANGDON STREET CAFE COUNTRY BOY, your tall and meek mannerisms make me sigh. You think I come for your delicious egg sandwiches, but it’s you I’m hungry for. Can I snap your suspenders? 1139 GODDESS SPOTTED AT 3 TOMATOES. You’re a UVM student. Comsci major?

Squash fetish? My eyes turned into Jello when I saw you. You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever set eyes on. Call me snooger. I can already feel your heart.

1138 JOHNSON IS LOOKING FOR FEMNFRE. We chatted online for over a year. I’m not who you think I am. The info is still the same. I miss our chats. 1137 BEAUTIFUL WOMAN LOOKING FOR THE eight-foot wood rack. Red A&F sweatshirt and jeans. No ring? Asked me for help.

Buy you a latte/tea/glass of wine? Maybe we’ll hit it off. 1136 MR. CAPRICORN WHAT IS IT THAT LURES you enough to bring you to your knees?

A true player wouldn’t be on his knees. I want to see what you see. 1131 I WAS SO SAD YOU DIDN’T ANSWER your phone. I knew that you would deliver. Thanks for being there, Leo, when I was hungry for your love. Through the high times and the low, you’re my little slice of heaven. 1130 12/4 SEXY BOARDER IN RED HOT SUIT, c’mon and ride me! 1129 12/02 BEAUTY FROM OPUS! YOU USED to make my sandwiches at Trono, we knew Clark, you work at the hospital now.

We spoke briefly, you left before I could give you my number. Let’s get together, girl! 1128

SEVEN DAYS has the right to refuse any personal or “I Spy” ad that does not meet our submission standards. Ads can and will be refused that contain overly specific identifying information, explicit sexual references, or offensive, abusive or inappropriate language. Acceptable ads will be published for up to four consecutive weeks.

SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005| 7D Personals 41B

I SPY A MONTPELIER CHITTENDEN BANK teller Monday, 12/5. I was wearing the black cap and blue zip-up sweater. You smiled. Seemed like oh so dreamy a boy.

I hope that I’m right. 1126

DAVE, TRIPNOFIX. GOT FOOD? SORRY about N.H. You were missed, too. I goofed my number. It’s 43, not 34. Four years too long. Call me. Betsy. Cody’s magic jukebox, remember? How’s Curtis?

McCausland! 1057

TO THE ANGEL WHO CRASHED MY PARTY, the one w/the mountain sunrise smile and fairy wing dew eyes. You taught me the other way to freak out and I love you for it. Never stop serving it up. Namaste.

1125

THUNDERCATS....HO! HAD A GREAT time at dinner. We should do it again soon!? 1045 A GUY TAKING ADVANTAGE OF A BEAUtiful single mom for far too long. I have tried to steal her away, but she is too nice to cheat. Get a job and take care of her or I will. 1044

CAPITOL GROUNDS: TO THE WOMAN WHO is not studying aesthetics who leaves me wondering how to know beauty. Hi, there!

1061

A DARK-HAIRED, SEXY, FUN-LOVING GUY w/a great laugh. We come bearing the gifts of a mark you never had before and not from a home appliance. You gave us The Cookie and “managed” your way into our hearts.... 1042

12/07/05 week’s crossword answers.

I SPY A SMOKING-HOT BLONDE- HAIRED woman in a hot black top. Dancing by herself, 11/27, at Park Place in Essex.

Want a dance partner sometime? 1037 11/29 COLLEGE FLIP-FLOPS, SWEATER, collared shirt, Seven Jeans, wish I could flirt. Green and Gold, running by flashed you a smile, you caught my eye. RJ’s, Ales You, Pam’s or Cook’s, let’s get together away from the books. 1035 A GORGEOUS BRUNETTE AT WILLISTON northbound rest area. I like your glasses, but it was the remarkable face they decorated that stood out, it’s a second job.

Want to go meet? 9987 11/19, JSC PRAXIS 2, WE TALKED OF shoes and flying. Me: M, blue jacket. How about a drink? 9982 WE COULDN’T KEEP OUR EYES OFF EACH other. You wore a gray, beautiful hat and had dark eyes w/a well-worn gray sweater at the Raq show at Higher Ground. At the end of the show, you stopped me at the grass hill and had me write my phone number. Peace. 9979 I SPY JP. SUCH A SAD SOUL AT SUCH A tender age. Perhaps she’s not worth the salt in our tears. Hate the haters, son.

Rape the rapers. Hell is not one level, but four tiers. Know your enemy. 9974 SHAW’S, BERLIN, 11/19. YOU: TALL, M, grayish hair w/preteen/teen son. Me: short F, blondish hair, blue eyes, toddler daughter. Saw you buying white wine.

Later, exchanged a smile. I felt instant chemistry. Are you single? Call me! 9973 10/29, SCOTT FROM ROUSES POINT: MY hands were cold in Montreal, but your kiss warmed my soul and made my knees weak. Where are you? 9970 ROLAND, WILL YOU EVER SING “swingin” to me again? 9969 CHOIR GIRL. NOW YOU HAVE BEEN SPIED. Here’s looking at you (from over in the tenor section). You’re amazing, and you make me smile. Thank you for being you.

Go, ginjo. 9962

3x4.5-Sex Secerts

12/13/05

12:22 PM

Page 1

SCIENCE TEACHER FROM RICHMOND AREA, I think you’re more my type, I could hunt you down but thought I’d try this first. Can we play Scrabble at LSC again? T. 9955

Psst.

Seven Days Sex Issue February 1

Got a need to do the naughty while wearing nappies?

Some other sex secret you wish you could tell?

Seven Days wants to hear about it!

We’ll spill the beans — anonymously, of course — in our Sex Issue, February 1, 2006. Don’t worry about length or language. Just come clean. Or dirty. We’ll do the rest.

Send us your sex secrets by January 27.

Online at sevendaysvt.com, sex@sevendaysvt.com or mail to Sex Secrets, Seven Days, P.O. Box 1164 Burlington, VT 05402-1164.

JULIE W.? YOU WERE SHOPPING, 11/13, I was working and making you laugh.

Talking about Bradford College and the area around the defunct college. Can I show you the mountains we were talking about? 9952 TO THE NURSE LADY FROM NEW ORLEANS now in Montpelier. We spoke at the Alchemist in Waterbury. I have some Clapton that you really should listen to.

9937 MICHAEL FRANTI CONCERT. TO A LADY who put her hand on my shoulder, Habebi! I think you are very nice. I just might be a quiet member of your family.

What if WRUV plays Democracy now?

Listen w/me. 9935 I SPY THE HANDSOME, ROMANTIC, GENerous, fun-loving, well built, awesome, Clint Eastwood look-alike on the path to the gypsy hut. Thank you for lighting up my life. Shall we dance? 9929 WOMAN W/BLACK DOG, HUBBARD PARK, Montpelier 11/06. Your dog attacked my dog, spoke briefly, ran into you later.

Spoke about cut in mouth. My dog went to vet for infection. Visit cost $60. Uppity women unite sticker. Contact, please.

9897 YOU: CUTE BLONDE IN DINING SECTION of Ri’ Ra’ w/your brunette friend on 11/11. Me: guy in yellow golf shirt and black fleece vest who couldn’t stop looking at you. We shared some long stares.

Meet me for coffee? 9889 11/10, 8 P.M., CITY MARKET FREEZER section cutie! Me tan hat, long dark hair and on the phone. We shared a few glances. I would have like to have talked to you, maybe we still can. 9888 JULIA, AKA JULES, WE MET IN FRONT of 3 Needs. We have more in common than just our names. Can we meet for java or tea?? 9886 11/11: I SPY A TALL, HANDSOME blondie. He is smart, funny and enginerdy w/a contagious smile. Keep being cute and corny! 9885 GREG BROWN SHOW: YOU’RE A DARKhaired male sharing fries with a woman, but making eye contact with me. Are you available? 9771 I SPY A WOMAN WITH SHORTER BLONDE hair dancing in the sun in my neighbors’ driveway at the Commons in Williston.

I’m 26, F, good-natured, honest. Maybe we have some things in common? No harm in meeting, right? 9769 THANK YOU, KIM, AT LIBBY’S DINER, 10/30. Me: redhead with friend. You told me I couldn’t leave with my scarf. Still want it? 9767 10/27, SHAW’S AT NOONTIME. YOUR daughter was in a car cart, she wanted a sticker, I smiled. We passed in the aisles a few times, then I was 2 behind you in line. Want to go out? 9765 10/29, METRONOME. SAUCY BAVARIAN Beer Wench. Daisy & Luke Duke enjoyed your wit, would like to mix you drinks & dance with you again. Prefer a group?

Your confessor is welcome, too.

Spankings all around? 9763 RAQ 10/29: YOU: TALL, BASEBALL HAT, vest, blondish hair, beard? Me: Short, blonde, green sweater, dancing with friends. Caught your eye a few times before you left in your purple car (alone) as I tried to escape from my friends for a second so I could say hi. Did you see me, too? 9762

42B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS | employment@sevendaysvt.com

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Send resumes to Human Resources Manager Email: hasse.stephany@jobcorps.org or come in and fill out an application today. 100 A MacDonough Dr., Vergennes, VT 05491 802-877-0159.

Âť Full benefits package with excellent 401k, medical, dental Âť Casual dress - wear sneakers and jeans!!

Âť EMAIL YOUR â&#x20AC;&#x153;STORYâ&#x20AC;? TO CAREERS@DEALER.COM Âť FOR MORE INFO. VISIT WWW.CAREERS.DEALER.COM

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For Information on the Job Corps program go to: www.jobcorps.doleta.gov Northlands Job Corps Center is an Equal Opportunity Employer.

employment@sevendaysvt.com | SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | 7D Classifieds 43B

EMPLOYMENT Our Family Focus Program is an innovative program that is a collaborative effort between Rutland Mental Health Services and Vermont Achievement Center. It provides crisis intervention, short-term family stabilization services and initial triage for all new clients. The following positions are full-time (37.5 hours) and provide competitive salary and benefits including health/dental insurance and 401K.

FAMILY FOCUS PROGRAM COORDINATOR

We are seeking a dynamic, detail-oriented individual with strong leadership qualities, excellent communication skills and previous clinical supervisory experience to lead an interdisciplinary team of 12-14 staff. Responsibilities include administrative and clinical supervision, budgeting, some direct service serving as a resource for families and the community and participation in larger agency management functions. Must be a team player and demonstrate a commitment to interagency collaboration.

Master’s degree and license required. Three to five years supervisory experience preferred.

Home Provider Support team is looking for a family or single woman to share their home in Franklin County with a woman who has a developmental disability and has been diagnosed with dementia. She enjoys music, visiting, church, her cat and socializing. Our goal is to assist her in remaining an active member of her community. NCSS will provide training, respite, stipend and support. Home Providers will work closely with Services Coordinator and other team members to support this individual.

Please contact Louise Beaudoin at 524-6555, ext. 622 for more information.

FAMILY FOCUS CLINICIAN

We are looking for a self-motivated individual who works well with children, families and community professionals. This position provides crisis intervention and short-term stabilization services for children with emotional, behavioral or substance abuse Thean ability to work under ad? pressure andMichelle maintain Brown 865-1020 x 21 Need toissues. place employment Call e ma positive a i l attitude m in i a cconstantly h e l changing l e @atmosphere s e v ise n d a y s v t . c o m essential to this position. This individual should possess strong Tired of the Monday thru Friday, 9 to 5 grind? Recovery-oriented mental health program is seeking communication skills and comfort with home and the right person to be a mentor/companion to provide lots of TLC to a woman with life, cultural and community-based work. Master’s degree required.

Intensive Community Support

Need toto: place Please send resume

behavioral challengesxin21 her Franklin County home. Individuals need to have positive energy, creative an ad? Call Michelle Brown 865-1020

talent and be a team player. Knowledge of mental illness helpful, however not required. If you are someone who “thinks outside the box” and are open to alternative learning experiences this may be Rutland Mental Health Services an ideal position for you. Hours vary with schedule flexibility, including days, evenings, weekend Human Resources and overnight To place an 222 employment ad call Michelle Brown 865-1020 x 21hours. Terrific opportunity for college students, individuals needing to supplement PO Box income or those wanting a flexible work schedule. Valid driver’s license, good driving record and a Rutland, VT 05702 EOE curious mind are required. Send cover letter and resume to address below.

Adult Community Support Worker employment@sevendaysvt.com

Online @ 7Dclassifieds.com

Progressive community mental health program seeks dynamic, flexible team player to provide case management services to individuals with severe and persistent mental illness. The ideal candidate will have the ability to deliver services in community-based settings. Services include supportive counseling, symptom management, social and interpersonal skills development, daily living skills, money management, and advocacy. Requires both the ability to work independently and in a collaborative multidisciplinary team environment. Applicants must have the ability and willingness to provide transportation for clients. Experience a plus, however not required. Bachelor’s degree in the Human Service field and/or relevant experience required. Competitive wages. Excellent benefits.

Please send letter of interest and resume to address below.

7Dclassifieds.com

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Residential Support Worker – Full-time Awake Overnight

Progressive mental health program is seeking an energetic, team-oriented individual to work as a full-time, awake overnight staff in a therapeutic residential program. Responsibilities include providing support to adults with severe and persistent mental illness, assisting in problem solving issues that arise, developing and maintaining relationships with other individuals and agencies in a community setting. This is an excellent opportunity for psychology, social work or human service students to gain experience working in the mental health field. Applicants should have good communication skills, be able to work as part of a team, be able to make decisions, and have a valid driver’s license with a clean driving record. Minimum computer skill required. Competitive wages. Excellent benefits. Please send resume and cover letter to address below.

Behavioral Interventionist – C.A.T Team NCSS, Inc. is seeking a Behavioral Interventionist to work in the Collaborative Achievement Team – CAT Program. This program is serving children in Franklin & Grand Isle Counties within the framework of a school system. Candidates must possess strong communication skills and work as a team member in supporting challenging children to achieve success in school. Candidates should have a Bachelor’s or Associate’s degree in the Human Services field and experience working with children. This position is full-time and offers benefits and a competitive salary.

Send resume to the address below.

Family Support Worker Northwestern Counseling & Support Services is seeking a self-motivated, family-centered individual to work as part of its Family Support Team. The position provides direct service and support to children and families in home and community-based settings including service coordination, assessment, advocacy, parent education and skills training. Strong collaboration and communication skills, a valid driver’s license and reliable vehicle are a must. Please send cover letter and resume to the address below.

HR Dept., 107 Fisher Pond Road, St. Albans, VT 05478 •EOE. Visit our website for a complete listing of our job opportunites: www.ncssinc.org.

44B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS | employment@sevendaysvt.com

7D CLASSIFIEDSEMPLOYMENT Moose Mountain Tanning Company Morrisville Seeking motivated individual for full-time employment in busy tanning salon. Position requires excellent customer service skills and will also include filing and data entry.

We’ll help you fill all that free time.

SEVEN DAYS

Please call 802-851-1126 or apply in person, Tuesday - Friday, 2-8pm. Located inside Blockbuster in the Morrisville Plaza Shopping Center.

Ask for Ted.

The Baird Center for Children and Families A Division of the Howard Center for Human Services

UNIQUE AND EXCITING MENTAL HEALTH CLINICIAN OPPORTUNITY Newly created mental health position, located at the Milton Family Practice, a division of Fletcher Allen Health Care. The position is a joint hire between The Baird Center for Children and Families and Fletcher Allen Health Care. This position incorporates clinical assessments, short-term follow up services, collaboration with medical staff at Milton Family Practice and external professionals. Exciting possibilities to help shape the position and have input into position needs and direction. Position requires a Master’s in social work, psychology, or related field and experience with children, adolescents, and families. Licensed or License Eligible preferred. A familiarity with mental health resources and the ability to work both collaboratively and independently a must. Reliable transportation required.

Send resume and cover letter by January 9, 2006, to Michelle Fane, C/O Baird Center for Children and Families, 1138 Pine Street, Burlington, VT 05401.

EOE/TTY Individuals with disabilities encouraged to apply. Visit our website at www.howardcenter.org for a full listing of open positions.

Cathedral Square Corporation, a nonprofit organization providing housing and services to seniors throughout Vermont, is seeking the following:

Maintenance Technician He/she will perform a wide range of maintenance and custodial duties to maintain attractive properties (we own/manage 22 properties) for our residents including painting, apartment turnovers, HVAC, electrical and plumbing repairs, cleaning common areas, snow shoveling and landscaping. Must possess a high school diploma and one year of experience in property maintenance. Must have a valid driver’s license and reliable transportation to work at various sites. Must be able to lift 60 pounds and perform the physical activities associated with maintenance work.

LNA Seeking part-time and per diem Licensed Nurse Assistants to work in our beautiful Assisted Living Residence. He/she will assist residents with activities of daily living and with resident activities. Day, evening and night shifts available.

CSC offers a competitive salary, excellent benefit package and a friendly working environment.

Submit resume or application to:

CSC, Human Resources 308 Pine Street, Burlington, VT 05401 or fax to 802-863-6661 or email to jobs@cathedralsquare.org www.CathedralSquare.org. EOE

‘Tis The season...

To be savvy!

Purchase a display employment classified ad at the regular price for the December 21st issue of Seven Days, and we’ll run it on December 28th at HALF PRICE! Deadline for BOTH ADS: Monday, December 19th at 5pm sharp.

Email your ad to: michelle@sevendaysvt.com Thanks for choosing Seven Days!

See you in the New Year!

SEVEN DAYS

New England Federal Credit Union, Vermont’s largest Credit Union with 7 branch locations, is a growing organization committed to excellence in price, convenience, service, simplicity, and to sharing success. NEFCU offers a stable, supportive, high-standards work environment, where employees are treated as key stakeholders. Please visit our website - www.nefcu.com to learn more about the great opportunities and benefits that exist at NEFCU.

SEMINAR ASSISTANT (PART-TIME)

New England Federal Credit Union is looking for a part-time Seminar Assistant to help prepare and organize our educational seminars. We are looking for someone who is enthusiastic, friendly, helpful, reliable and flexible to provide exceptional customer service to our members. The part-time assistant will be responsible for registering participants, preparation and setup of conference rooms including materials & ordering refreshments, in addition to maintaining seminar inventory & supplies. Qualified candidates must project a friendly and personable demeanor, and have effective communication skills.

Experience with Microsoft products, a valid driver’s license and the ability to lift up to 20lbs. This position is part-time, 5 hours per day, 20 hours per week and will require flexibility within a 12-7:30 p.m. work environment.

MEMBER SERVICE REPRESENTATIVE

New England Federal Credit Union is looking for a Member Service Representative to create a strong member relationship by performing member services in a friendly and accurate manner. The successful candidate will be committed to excellence in all areas of member service, demonstrate flexibility in different roles to meet the needs of the Branch, have effective communication and problem solving skills, be committed to first time accuracy, and show personal initiative to acquire knowledge necessary for success.

This position requires the ability to work Monday-Thursday, 9-6 p.m. and Friday, 10-7p.m., as well as one Saturday a month.

If you believe you have the talents and skills to contribute to success at NEFCU and would like to be part of a dynamic team, please forward a brief statement of your interest in the position along with your resume in confidence to HR@nefcu.com or by mail to NEFCU, Human Resources, P.O. Box 527, Williston, VT 05495-5027.

EOE

employment@sevendaysvt.com | SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | 7D Classifieds 45B

EMPLOYMENT PHOTO: MATTHEW THORSEN

Good News Garage in Burlington has a team of great people. They take donated vehicles, repair them and provide them to more than 200 low-income Vermonters each year. How did Good News Garage find these experienced people with big hearts? By advertising in the Seven Days employment section, of course.

DEREK JOYCE, Mechanic JIM FINCH, Donations Coordinator KATHRYN FARMER, Dispatcher

>

seven days. it works.

46B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS | employment@sevendaysvt.com

7D CLASSIFIEDSEMPLOYMENT WAREHOUSE POSITIONS

BARTENDING SCHOOL

Chef Line-Cook

Peregrine Outfitters, an outdoor equipment and accessory distributor currently has positions available in the warehouse. The positions offer flexible work schedules, purchase of outdoors products at cost and a team-motivated environment.

• Hands-on Training

Full-time Permanent position with a growing restaurant in Waterbury. Day and Night Shifts available. Competitive salary. Must have a positive attitude and work well with others.

• National Certification • Job Assistance

Apply in person to: Cris Peck at Waterbury Wings, 1 South Main St.

Please apply in person, M-F, 9am - 6pm at:

1-888-4drinks

25 Omega Drive Williston, VT

w w w. b a r t e n d i n g s c h o o l . c o m

PART-TIME OFFICE POSITION AVAILABLE

ACCOUNTING & BUDGET ANALYST

We are also seeking a nurse and a cook for the summer season.

North Country Health System has a full-time position available for an Accounting & Budget Analyst. Required is a Bachelor’s degree, preferably in Accounting or Business Administration, preferably with experience in a health-care setting and a working knowledge of electronic spreadsheets. Budget experience preferred. Responsibilities include assisting with the fiscal budget process; examining variances and allocating income, gains, losses and fees of investments; reconciling the hospital’s general monthly checking account; and other general ledger accounting and special projects as assigned. Diligence, accuracy, time management and commitment to confidentiality are absolutely essential.

We are looking for an individual with administrative skills to help in our winter office. If you are a great communicator, have strong computer skills, love variety in your work, tolerate filing, enjoy data entry, are friendly, helpful, reliable and flexible, we would love to hear from you.

This position is part-time, approximately 30 hours per week, will start ASAP and continue through the summer season into early fall.

Contact Stevie at the YWCA of Vermont, 802-862-7520, fax 862-4258, or email at hochelagacamp@aol.com.

Camp Hochelaga is a nonprofit summer camp for girls, located on the shores of Lake Champlain in South Hero.

Interested candidates may apply online at www.nchsi.org.

For additional information, contact: Mike Simpson Human Resources (802) 334-3218 Email: msimpson@nchsi.org

YWCA of VT/Camp Hochelaga 1241 Prim Road, Colchester, VT 05446

The

Counseling Service of Addison County, Inc.

Your best bet.

Become a Part of Our Exceptional Team!

SEVEN DAYS

JOB OPPORTUNITIES Therapeutic Outreach Clinician work - intensively w/children & adolescents & their families, in homes, schools, & community settings. Expertise in individual & group therapeutic interventions, family therapy, behavior management, crisis intervention & conflict resolution. Master’s degree preferred. FT w/ benefits.

School-Based Clinician - Master’s level working in high school setting: Must have skills in conflict resolution, problem-solving, group dynamics, behavioral & crisis interventions, knowledge of child & adolescent development & family dynamics. 10-month, school year position with benefits.

Community Integration Specialist - Support adults with developmental disabilities to achieve personal goals through community inclusion. Creativity and solid communication skills required. HS diploma or equivalent, valid driver’s license. PT w/benefits.

of Northern New England

PPNNE’s mission is to provide, promote and protect voluntary choices about reproductive health for all.

Employment Representative (2) - Job development, placement, and support to individuals with

ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT/RECEPTIONIST

developmental disabilities. Must be comfortable working in the public eye within the private sector at large and small companies. BS in relevant field or equivalent experience.FT w/benefits.

Join Planned Parenthood!

Therapeutic Support Workers - to work one-on-one with children with developmental, emotional and behavioral problems. BA preferred. Part-time contracted position.

Child/Family Outpatient Clinician - Individual, family & group treatment. Master’s degree & Vermont licensure required. 20-hour contracted position.

Case Manager in Youth and Family Services - Master’s level preferred, or combination of education and experience working with children with emotional/behavioral challenges and their families. Contracted full-time position until June 30, 2006.

Residential Substitute - for transitional program. Duties will include coaching 6 adults in independent living skills and providing supervision. Position requires flexible team player with positive,“can do”attitude.

Previous work experience with psychiatric programming preferred but not required.

For a complete list of job opportunities at CSAC, visit www.csac-vt.org.To apply, you may choose to contact us by:

• Email: hr@csac-vt.org • Mail: Send a resume and cover letter to Human Resources, CSAC, 89 Main Street, Middlebury, VT 05753 • In person: Application for employment can be picked up at Equal Opportunity Employer either CSAC office: 89 Main Street or 61 Court Street, Middlebury, VT • Phone: Please contact Human Resources at (802) 388-6751, ext. 485.

Seeking a creative and energetic full-time Administrative Assistant/Receptionist for our Williston Administration Center.

Provide general administrative support to a diverse group of Central Office departments, while assisting with a variety of assigned projects. Additional responsibilities include reception duties and telephone coverage.

The ideal candidate will have an Associate’s degree, or equivalent experience. Must be detail-oriented, with excellent written and oral communication skills, and able to work independently. We offer a progressive, supportive, team-oriented work environment and generous benefit package.

Please respond with resume, cover letter and salary requirements

by December 21st to:

PPNNE, Human Resources Manager 183 Talcott Road, Suite 101, Williston, VT 05495 or email hresources@ppnne.org EOE

employment@sevendaysvt.com | SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | 7D Classifieds 47B

EMPLOYMENT HOWARD CENTER FOR HUMAN SERVICES

COMMUNITY SUPPORT OUTREACH CLINICIAN

Hiring dependable people to help our elderly clients in Chittenden, Franklin, Addison and Lamoille counties. Our services include companionship, personal care, as well as light housekeeping, meal 5-1020preparation, x 21 errands and more. Work hourly or be t . c part o ofmour Live–In PLUS program and work 2-4 day shifts. Great pay, flexible schedule and training. Some weekend work is required.

To start as soon as possible! We are seeking a (1 full-time or 2 part-time) temporary (3 - 4 months) case manager for the Homeless Health Project to provide direct services and counseling in the field to homeless individuals with mental illness.

BA required, as is a valid Vermont driver’s license and reliable vehicle. Experience working with individuals with major mental illness is desired.

Please send resume and cover letter to:

To schedule n 865-1020 x 21 an interview call 802-288-8117

020

145 Pine Haven Shore Rd., Suite 1041 Shelburne, VT 05482 x 21 www.armisteadinc.com

Individuals with disabilities encouraged to apply. EEO/TTY

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HCHS ATTN: Paul Landerl 300 Flynn Ave. Burlington, VT 05401 or email to paull@howardcenter.org 802-865-6122

CLINICAL COORDINATOR

EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR

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Third Shift Security Guard Tuesday – Saturday, 7 pm – 3 am

Full-time position available in familycentered residential setting for boys.

Responsibilities include individual, group and family therapy, clinical supervision, treatment coordination with referral agencies, and some case management duties. Position requires some on-call time. y smust have v a tMaster’s . degree c ino Applicant human service field.

Nonprofit organization serving victims of intimate partner violence. Responsibilities include: Provide program management, feminist leadership and strategic planning to a well-established agency with seven dedicated staff; coordinate federally funded community response teams; work closely with assistant director to implement annual budget.

Qualifications: Ability to work collaboratively with consensus decision-making model. Awareness of relationship between the patriarchy and global oppression of women and children. Grant-writing experience and knowledge of relevant issues of battered women’s movement preferred. Full-time with full benefits. Salary dependent upon experience.

ca l l M i c h e l l e B r o w n 8 6 5 -1 020 x 2 1 Monitor contracted rovers’ shifts, secure property and discourage inappropriate activities/illegal behaviors. Assist with after-hours maintenance, perform fire drills, act as evening liaison with neighborhood, perform locks/unlocks of buildings, and inspect emergency equipment. One-two years experience in security in VT required. Proper state certification preferred.

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Review of resumes to begin immediately, position open until filled.

Send cover letter, resume and references: Human Resources, Champlain College PO Box 670, Burlington, VT 05402-0670 or fax 802-860-2772 or email hr@champlain.edu. EOE

The Baird Center for Children and Families

A Division of the Howard Center for Human Services

PROGRAM INTERVENTIONIST/ FAMILY AND COMMUNITY-BASED SERVICES Provide 1:1 support to children who are experiencing severe emotional and behavioral challenges. These therapeutic services focus on assisting children in developing adaptive skills necessary to remain in their home, school, and community settings. Applicants must possess good therapeutic and rapportbuilding skills, be a team-oriented participant, and be a positive advocate for the children and families they serve. BA req. Valid VT driver’s license, and auto insurance req. 37.5 hours/ week; afternoons and evenings. Extensive training, benefits.

Please submit cover letter and resume to:

Tracie Carlson The Baird Center 1138 Pine Street Burlington, VT 05401 www.howardcenter.org EEO/TTY

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Please send letter of interest and resume to: Executive Director Brookhaven Children and Family Services PO Box 127 Chelsea, VT 05038 (802) 685-4458

Vermont Refugee Resettlement Program Case Manager-VRRP Colchester: Provide case management services to arriving refugee families. Responsibilities include: arranging housing, healthcare, social services; interpretation; maintaining case files and providing cross-cultural information to families, service providers, and the community.

Requirements: excellent interpersonal skills, bilingual English and French, Swahili, and/or Lingala; driver’s license, clean driving record, and personal transportation.

Experience with social services or refugee resettlement preferred. FT, competitive salary, excellent benefits.

VRRP is a field office of U.S. Committee for Refugees & Immigrants. USCRI is an equal opportunity employer.

Women and minorities are encouraged to apply. No phone calls please. Submit a resume that includes salary history with a cover letter describing your interest and qualifications to:

Amila Begovic Vermont Refugee Resettlement Program 462 Hegeman Ave, Suite 101 Colchester, VT 05446 abegovic@uascrivt.org

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Survivors and people from diverse communities encouraged to apply. EOE Please send cover letter and resume by 12/21/05 to:

Battered Women’s Services and Shelter P.O. Box 652, Barre, VT 05641

Make a difference for children and families! Two part-time positions may be combined into one full-time position for the right person.

Child Care Referral Specialist 15 hours/week Do you like to help people make important connections? Help parents find childcare options and assist them in making one of the most critical choices they will face. Requires post-secondary degree, excellent communication skills, detail orientation, ability to use related computer technology.

Early Care and Education Specialist 24 hours/week Become part of a 3-teacher team dedicated to creating a rich program and inviting environment for children ages 3-5. Low child-to-staff ratio.

Seeking flexible individual with a nurturing, childcentered approach. Prior experience in group child care is required. Related education a plus.

Cover letter and resume to:

Box EM7, Child Care Resource 181 Commerce St., Williston, VT 05495

by December 21.

48B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS | employment@sevendaysvt.com

7D CLASSIFIEDSEMPLOYMENT The Sara Holbrook Community Center seeks

AMERICAN FLATBREAD COMPANY

YOUTH WORKERS

in Waitsfield is interviewing for an Assistant Prep Crew Leader.

Part-time position, Fridays and Saturdays from 8 am until prep is done, potential to become full-time with additional shifts in bakery or restaurant. We are looking for someone with the ability to see a job through to completion, good communication skills, knife skills, prepping experience and an enthusiasm for cooking with local, seasonal and organic foods. If you’re interested, contact:

for its Teen Program. Work with middle school and high school youth after school and in early evenings.

Coordinate and implement activities as well as supervise and encourage youth. Workers needed at two sites; hours vary upon site. Access to reliable transportation and clean driving record required.

Please send resume and three references to: Sara Holbrook Community Center Attn: Lelsa Pollander 66 North Avenue Burlington, VT 05401

Jeremy at 802-496-8856 or send resume to: jeremy@americanflatbread.com Need to place an employment ad? Call Michelle Brown 865-1020 x 21 e

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Need to place an ad? Call Michelle Brown 865-1020 x 21 WANTED:

Project Manager/Operations Assistant

FULL OR PART-TIME To CHEMOTHERAPY place an employment NURSE ad call Michelle Brown 865-1020 x 21

Local company specializing in the importation, distribution and installation of indoor sport flooring is seeking an Asst. Project Manager./Operations Assistant. A project management/ sport construction background preferred but not required. Pay is competitive with substantial increase after six months. Increase commensurate with performance. For more details, call number below.

Competitive pay and excellent benefit package.

employment@sevendaysvt.com

Fax or mail your resume to:

Online @ 7Dclassifieds.com Lake Champlain Gynecologic Oncology 364 Dorset Street S. Burlington, Vermont 05403 Phone: 802-859-9500 Fax: 802-859-9944 Attention: Linda Davidson

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burlingtonvtjobs@spherion.com

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STERLING AREA SERVICES has the following job opportunity available:

Are you willing to provide a loving and nurturing home to a 12-year-old boy with developmental disabilities?

This young man prefers a couple with a structured home and no young children. Experience with developmental disabilities preferred. Training is available. Generous stipend and respite funding provided. Interested parties should call Sterling Area Services at 1-800-698-7602 for an application. Immediate placement needed.

109 Professional Drive, Morrisville, VT 05661 or fax to 802-888-1182.

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Immediate Opening MUSIC TEACHER

Orange Center School & Washington Village School

Music Teacher .40 FTE for grades K-8 needed.

One day per week in each building beginning in January. Duties includes after-school coordination of band and chorus. Degree preferred BA or higher. Must possess or be eligible for Vermont Licensure. Forward letter of interest, resume, transcripts, proof of licensure and three letters of reference to:

Orange North Supervisory Union 111 Brush Hill Road Williamstown, VT 05679 E.O.E.

STAFF NURSE

RN OR LPN Full or part-time

Evenings - $4000 Sign-on Bonus Nights - $5000 Sign-on Bonus • Competitive salary and benefits • Better staffing ratios • Extensive orientation • Recipient of Care Giver of the Year Award Send resume to: The Arbors 687 Harbor Road, Shelburne, VT 05482 Fax to: 802-985-9787 Email: dotoole@benchmarkarb.com

Howard Center for Human Services Community Support Clinician: Senior Designer/ Print Manager Come join the country’s leading direct-marketer of gourmet, chefprepared meals. We’re looking for a senior designer/print manager to join our rapidly growing catalog, web and retail-based business.

Qualified candidates should have 4+ years of experience in catalog design. Prior work with web design, retail packaging and print vendor management a plus. We offer competitive compensation including stock options and full benefits. If you are hardworking, work well as part of a team, and have a positive attitude you will find Home Bistro a great place to be.

Send your resume and samples of your portfolio to humanresources@homebistro.com or:

Marketing Department, Home Bistro Foods Inc. 190 Banker Rd., Plattsburgh, NY 12901

Full-time position available to support persons with psychiatric disabilities in Chittenden County. Work as part of a multi disciplinary team providing creative problem solving, advocacy, resource development, case management, counseling and crisis support.

Direct services to clients, families and the community.

BA or Master’s degree in human services field and experience with persons with serious and persistent mental disorders preferred. Please submit resumes to: Thomas Paquette LICSW 300 Flynn Avenue Burlington, VT 05401 Individuals with disabilities encouraged to apply.

EOE/TTY.

GROCERY DISTRIBUTION COORDINATOR Coordinate Grocery Room at Food Shelf. Must enjoy working with a wide range of people – advocacy, empathy, outreach, referrals, limit setting, and more.

Schedule, train, and supervise volunteers. Moderate lifting and ability to stand for most of the day required. $12.60 hour. 40 hours per week. www.cvoeo.org.

Letter of interest, resume and 3 references by December 30 to:

The Chittenden Emergency Food Shelf 228 N. Winooski Ave., Burl., Vt. 05401 Members of minority and diverse cultural groups are encouraged to apply. EOE

employment@sevendaysvt.com | SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | 7D Classifieds 49B

EMPLOYMENT CAREER & JOB ISSUES COACHING

The Old Brick Cafe in Williston

Job got you down? Need help getting a more satisfying job or career?

Elliott Ketay, B.S., M.Ed. *member American Counseling Association *member Career Counseling Association *former Assistant Director Career Services Dartmouth College

For January workshop registration and/or private appointment in Burlington, call: 603-795-9367 or email: careerissues@yahoo.com

get to work

Pizza/Line Cook Well experienced, supervisor potential. Must work nights.

Apply in person at: 167 Main Street, Burlington

802-658-6776

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Administrative Assistant Local company specializing in the importation, distribution and installation of indoor sport flooring is seeking an administrative asstistant. Ideal candidate will have 2-3 yrs administrative experience. Will be assisting all departments. Must have excellent computer, phone and customer service skills. For more details, call number below.

Administrative Assistant Experienced person needed to manage small So. Burlington office. Proficiency in MS Office, QuickBooks Pro and ability to manage office, payroll, A/R, A/P, administer HR functions and benefits.

Marketing experience helpful, construction knowledge a plus. Must be self-reliant.

For more company information, visit our website at www.viscc.com.

Please send resume to:

viserv@aol.com or call 800-639-7113.

Responsibilities include, but are not limited to: weddings, meetings and bus groups. 2-3 years of progressively responsible sales experience required.

Demonstrated responsibility for booking, detailing and servicing events with a high degree of accuracy and detail. Ideal candidate will have a strong network and contacts within the resort/hospitality industry. Excellent written, oral and interpersonal communication skills are required. Full-time yearround position. Submit CV and resume to:

HR@boltonvalley.com

Please call (802) 872-9599.

To apply, contact Billy Ward at 802-363-4684.

Immediate Opening ALTERNATIVE ED PARAPROFESSIONAL

Williamstown Middle High School Dynamic Individual to assist teachers and provide academic and behavior support to students in alternative setting within the school. Education requirement is an Associateâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s degree, equivalent college credits, or â&#x20AC;&#x153;high qualifiedâ&#x20AC;? documentation. Send cover letter, resume, three letters of reference and certification documents to:

Orange North Supervisory Union 111 Brush Hill Road E.O.E. Williamstown, VT 05679

WINOOSKI SCHOOL DISTRICT 2005-2006

OPENINGS

VNRC SEEKS ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR OF MEMBERSHIP AND DEVELOPMENT

Bruce Chattman, Superintendent of Schools 60 Normand St., Winooski, VT 05404 (802) 655-0485, www.winooski.k12.vt.us

The Vermont Natural Resources Council, Vermontâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s largest and oldest independent environmental advocacy organization, seeks a motivated, committed, experienced professional with the proven ability to manage our database and strengthen our dedicated core of members. The Associate Director of Membership & Development will work closely with the Executive Director and Development Director to create and implement a plan to raise the funds necessary to advance VNRCâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s programs.

Applications accepted until positions filled. All employees must undergo a Criminal Records Check. EOE

For a complete job description, visit www.vnrc.org or call 802-223-2328.

CUSTODIAN â&#x20AC;&#x201D; Full-time, year-round, excellent benefits, 3-11:30 p.m. shift when school is in session - daytime when school is out. Cleaning experience required. Good communication skills. Stable work history.

Essex Junction Recreation & Parks

BOLTON VALLEY RESORT IS SEEKING AN EXPERIENCED GROUP SALES MANAGER

Starting mid-January.

*The Lake Champlain Regional Chamber of Commerce has immediate openings for Tourism Assistants at its I-89 Northbound and Southbound Welcome Centers.

Positions include some custodial work.

Send letter of application, resume and three references to:

802-864-5900 burlingtonvtjobs@spherion.com

25-35 hours/week in our relaxed-pace kitchen. Also seeking a dishwasher & servers.

I-89 WILLISTON WELCOME CENTERS TOURISM ASSITANCE/CUSTODIAL SHIFTS AVAILABLE

Accepting resumes for full-time infant/young toddler position at a NAEYC accredited center.

ECE degree preferred, experience required. Competitive pay and strong team approach in a family atmosphere.

Call the Charlotte Childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Center at 802-425-3328 for more information.

-PZBMUZ .BSLFUJOH $PPSEJOBUPS

is seeking an experienced breakfast/ lunch cook to fill a Thurs.-Sun. position for approximately

AFTER-SCHOOL CHILDCARE STAFF We are looking for individuals to staff our statelicensed after-school program for students in grades K-5. Candidates must be age 18 or older and have experience working with youth. All applicants must have ability to obtain Red Cross CPR and First-Aid certification. Position pays $10/hour, approx. 20 hours/week.

For additional information and application requirements please visit our website at www.ejhs.k12.vt.us (click on Job Opportunities). Applications only accepted electronically on schoolspring.com. Job ID 8275 EOE.

Evening Manager We are looking for the right person to manage our evening operation. In addition to strong management skills and experience, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re looking for the passion for customer service, rapport with staff and attention to detail that we are known for.

Please send cover letter, resume and 4 references to: Attn: Katy Lesser 4 Market Street South Burlington, VT 05403

50B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS | employment@sevendaysvt.com

Graphic Designer

7D CLASSIFIEDSEMPLOYMENT Servers * Hosts

Graphic Designer needed for fast paced, online promotional sticker business. Mac based experience with Illustrator, Photoshop, etc. needed. We’re looking for a very organized individual with good communication skills as customer service and sales skills are also needed. Websticker.com is one of the leading online sources for custom stickers and is headquartered in Stowe, VT.

The Fairfield Inn by Marriott Colchester is looking for reliable, hardworking and enthusiastic individuals to join our team.

We currently have openings for full and part-time:

Please come in for an application.

• Full-time Front Desk, • Part-time Night Auditor A flexible schedule is a must. Please apply in person at: 84 South Park Drive Colchester, VT 05446 (802) 655-1400

Please email resume to:

C H U R C H S T R E E T, B U R L I N G T O N

jeff@freelycreative.com

RESIDENTIAL PROGRAMS COORDINATOR

Join AmeriCorps! Make a difference in the lives of young people! Two AmeriCorps positions available to start immediately at the Washington County Youth Service Bureau/Boys & Girls Club.

Are you a dynamic, detail-oriented individual with strong leadership qualities, excellent communication skills and a familiarity with behavioral treatment plans? If so, the state’s largest nonprofit is seeking you to coordinate our psychiatric residential programs for adults who are considered to have major mental illness and substance abuse disorders. Responsibilities including supervision of staff, intake assessment, budgeting, serving as a resource for families and the community, and participation in larger agency management and clinical issues. A Master’s degree and solid assessment skills are required and three to five years of supervisory experience preferred.

A sense of humor and being a team player are musts. Full-time position with excellent benefits. Resumes to:

AmeriCorps/State position with CountryPaths, an afterschool program serving middle school students in the Washington West Supervisory Union that offers a broad array of enrichment activities at school and around the community. For information contact Jill Rolfe at (802)229-9151.

AmeriCorps/State position with CityScape, a school-based afterschool program serving middle school youth in Barre, Vermont. Cityscape’s mission is twofold: to decrease substance abuse in the community, and increase students’ success in school.

For information contact Marichel Nuguid at (802)229-9151.

Lis Mickenberg, LICSW 300 Flynn Ave., Burlington, VT 05401 or email to: LisM@HowardCenter.org

Members are part of the Vermont Youth Development Corps (VYDC) AmeriCorps/State Program and receive a bi-weekly living allowance, health benefits, comprehensive skill development training, and an education award of $4725 upon completion of a 9-12 month term of service.

Temporary Coordinator position (as described above) is available on a short-term basis. *** EOE/TTY Individuals with disabilities encouraged to apply. *** Need Please visit www.howardcenter.org to see all current job opportunities.

To apply for eitherad? position, send resume and letter of interest by Monday, to place an December 19th to:

Call

Michelle Brown Tom Howard, Executive Director

8 6 5 - 1 0 2 AmeriCorps 0 x 2 1 Position

Washington County Youth Service Bureau/B&GC PO Box 627, Montpelier, VT 05601-0627

Wake Up and Smell the Opportunities!

Need to place an ad?

Our company has the following career opportunities available in Waterbury, VT:

Call

8 6 5 - 1 0 2 0

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This position is responsible for the overall operating performance of the Waterbury production facility.They will be responsible for creating and managing an annual budget.The person holding this position will report on the operating results for the production areas to the Plant Manager and work to streamline the efficiency of production with an emphasis on quality and improved Need to place an employment ad? Call Michelle results period to period.They will be responsible for a production staff of 50 plus employees. e

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an immediate opening for an Outreach Coordinator based out of our Burlington office. This is a great opportunity to work Production Supervisors for 1st/2nd Shifts with the Agency’s housing partners around the state to provide affordable Needhousing to These positions are responsible for the overall operating performance of the 1st/2nd shift to low and moderate income Vermonters. Primary responsibilities include promoting production areas.These Supervisors will be responsible for a staff of approximately 25 employees VHFA’s Homeownership (HO) Programs in Vermont through training and marketing each.The individuals holdingto these positions will manage report onCall the operating results of Need place an and ad?

Michelle Brown 865-1020 x 21 Home Building organizations, with Mortgage Lenders, Real Estate Professionals, these production areas to the Production Manager.They will also work to streamline the efficiency housing nonprofits and consumers. Also participates in new HO program of production with an emphasis on quality and improved financial results period to period. development and/or changes to existing programs.

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Qualified candidates will have: a minimum 5 years hands-on food manufacturing experience,

Bachelor’s degree or equivalent work experience, and a minimum of two years

and strong decision making skills. Knowledge of the fundamentals of lean manufacturing, pull systems and visual systems, an understanding of TQM and a strong knowledge of productivity tracking in conjunction with proficiency in MS Excel, and MS Word required as well. Previous experience working with Peoplesoft or another ERP system preferred.

experience is desired. Experience in public speaking and the design and preparation of training materials and presentations. Travel throughout Vermont on a regular basis and a valid VT Driver’s license, with dependable transportation, are required. Proficiency in Office 2000/XP products (Word, Excel, PowerPoint) and network computer skills are also necessary.

experience directly supervising and/or managingad employees, excellent communication skills in mortgage lending, To place an employment call Michelle Brownexperience 865-1020 x 21 real estate sales and/or affordable housing advocacy

employment@se

First Shift Manager/Supervisor schedule is Monday-Friday, 8am-5pm exempt. Second Shift Supervisor schedule is: Monday-Friday, 3-11:30pm exempt.

Online @ 7Dclassifieds.com

Demonstrated customer service skills along with excellent written and verbal communications skills are required. Must be highly organized, able to handle multiple tasks, set priorities, meet deadlines and work with a wide range of individuals, internal and external to the Agency.

VHFA offers a competitive salary and an excellent benefits package. Please send resume, salary requirement, and references by December 23rd to Rebecca Greenough, Office Manager:

7Dclassifieds.com

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Green Mountain Coffee seeks to make the world a better place for present and future generations by operating in an environmentally and socially conscientious manner.

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Our company offers a competitive total compensation program that includes starting wage, benefits and free coffee!

See a complete listing of our company benefits at www.gmcr.com.

resumes and inquiries to: To Please psend la c e a n e m p l o y m e n t a d VERMONT c a l lHOUSING M iFINANCE c h eAGENCY lle Brow

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employment@sevendaysvt.com | SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | 7D Classifieds 51B

EMPLOYMENT

DESIRABLE JOBSâ&#x20AC;Ś desirable candidates.

SEVEN DAYS Pick up 7D Classifieds free every Wednesday or read online at www.7dclassifieds.com.

Looking for the best staff? Reserve an ad with michelle@sevendaysvt.com.

52B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS | employment@sevendaysvt.com

7D CLASSIFIEDSEMPLOYMENT Need to place an e

PART-TIME COORDINATOR employment ad? Call Michelle

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ADMINISTRATIVE/CUSTOMER SUPPORT Brown x 21 Join865-1020 our team assisting customers from contract to a

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closing. Ideal candidate would be personable and classical new music group, seeks part-time coordinator for: concert production, marketing and fund-raising. Part-time, flexible organized with strong computer skills, VT real estate hours but will include extensive work on concert weekends. license preferred. Mortgage/Legal closing experience a toof place an ad?

Call Michelle Brown 865-1020 x 21 RequiresNeed knowledge Microsoft office suite and QuickBooks, plus. Send resume via fax to: good organizational and communication skills. Musical knowledge a plus. Pay: $12,000 to $15,000 depending on experience.

for school and after-school positions supporting an engaging young man with autism and challenging behaviors. Experience preferred and the desire to learn required.

802-846-4899 Please email cover letter and resume to Brown 865-1020 To place an employment ad call Michelle x 21 or email job@vt-homes.com No phone calls, please. clarcell@vcme.org.

Please call 802-888-7010 to apply.

employment@sevendaysvt.com

Online @ 7Dclassifieds.com

HUMAN RELATIONSHIP MANAGER As an active contributor to the leadership team, you will

#FBS $SFX 8BOUFE have the opportunity to bring about maximum personal, Accountants professional and business success for the staff of Kelliher 7 DSeeking c l F/T aaccountants s s i with f ivaried ed s . c o m â&#x20AC;˘ 7 D c l a s s i f i e d s.com Samets Volk. experience,

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Primary duties include coaching managers to help them excel and lead their teams successfully. You will also focus on staff review and evaluation and provide management support regarding staffing structure, job description development, performance management and e @ s e v e n d employee relations.

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Please send your resume and salary requirements to: dliebert@ksvc.com

802-864-5900

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Finance Director

place an employment ad call Michelle Brown 865-1020 x 21

HOWARD COMMUNITY SERVICES

A Division of the Howard Center Human Services Online @ for 7Dclassifieds.com 102 S. Winooski Ave. Burlington, VT 05401 www.HowardCenter.org

5IF 7FSNPOU 5FEEZ #FBS $PNQBOZ 4IFMCVSOF 3PBE 4IFMCVSOF 75

Project Harmony, an innovative, not-for-profit professional exchange and training organization currently seeks a Finance Director in its Waitsfield location. Responsibilities include cash management; operating budget development and maintenance; oversight of all program budgets (domestic and international); oversight of accounting operations and A-133 audit.

employment@sevendaysvt.com

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SHARED LIVING PROVIDER NEEDED

Associateâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s or Bachelorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s degree in Accounting with a minimum of 5 years prior work experience in a nonprofit (fund accounting) environment plus management experience is required. Proficiency in Microsoft Office, QuickBooks, Internet and database applications a must. Prior international experience and USAID contracting experience preferred.

Caring and responsible team players are needed to provide homes and support to persons with developmental disabilities. Positions offer excellent tax-free compensation, generous respite funds, rent training, and the opportunity to work with a supportive team. You must live in Chittenden County. We currently have openings for the following:

p l a c e a n e m p l o y m e n t a d ca l l M i c h eEqual l l eOpportunity B r o Employer. w n 8Salary 6 5commensurate -1 020withxexperience.

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â&#x20AC;˘ 18-year-old male CVU student who loves medieval studies, card games, movies and a structured environment. Ideal match would be a couple w/out children, (although grown children would be fine), in the So. Burlington or CVU cachement area. Contact Marisa Hamilton at 658-1914. â&#x20AC;˘ 19-20-year-old man, Friday afternoons to Sunday nights. Clientâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s interests include ATVs, hands-on activities, sports, bicycling and household chores. An ideal match would be a calm, compassionate couple w/ out young children.

Contact Marisa Hamilton at 865-6173.

ON-CALL SUBSTITUTES

Opportunities to provide supports to individuals in four HCS residential homes throughout Chittenden County and a day program in Burlington. On-call with flexible hours and paid trainings. This program offers an excellent opportunity to get acquainted with HCS and sometimes provides a stepping stone to other employment opportunities. Contact Julie at 802-658-1914.

RESPITE PROVIDERS

Support providers are needed to provide supports to individuals with developmental disabilities. We act as a listing agency. After the screening process is complete, providers are listed out to consumers and others on their team that will employ providers. Various opportunities are available that offer a flexible schedule and skill-building challenges. Hours and locations vary. Contact Marisa at 802-658-1914. ***EOE/TTY Individuals with disabilities encouraged to apply ***

Northeastern Family Institute

Bringing Vermont Children, Families & Communities Together

Want to make a difference in the life of a teen?

Respite - Community Skills Worker Community Based Services has openings for caring people to join our dynamic team, on an â&#x20AC;&#x153;as needed basisâ&#x20AC;?. Responsibilities include one-on-one and therapeutic group activities with youth in their homes and in the community, participating as a member of client treatment teams, and supporting young people to be safe, respectful and responsible members of their communities. Strong communication skills and ability to set limits required. Must be a team player and be able to work a flexible schedule including some evenings and weekends. Previous work with children with emotional/behavioral challenges desired.

If interested, please call Ali Wise at (802) 658-0040, ext. 1016. Please submit cover letter and resume to AliWise@nafi.com or mail to CBS Program SDA, NFI Vermont, 30 Airport Road, South Burlington, VT 05403. www.nafi.com EOE

employment@sevendaysvt.com | SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | 7D Classifieds 53B 1x3-redsquare121405

12/12/05

WAITSTAFF We need hot waitstaff!

Must be outgoing, hardworking and have flexible hours.

No crybabies.

We offer:a tray, a notepad and a bag for all your money!

No damn phone calls. ResĂşme to:

3:49 PM

Dinosaur Daycare is searching for some special people to join our team. If you have a sense of humor, lots of patience, enjoy singing, dancing, painting and large motor play, then we have the job for you! Join us and have some fun! Competitive pay and benefits.

136 Church St. Burlington, VT 05401

EMPLOYMENT

Page 1

Please call 878-8799.

Lamoille County Mental Health Services A designated agency providing developmental and mental health services in the Lamoille Valley has the following vacancies: Developmental Services Behavior Interventionists Provide 1:1 or small group therapeutic intervention for assigned children across environments. High school diploma and experience working with children with behavioral and emotional disorders and their families. Great pay. School schedule. Two full-time and one part-time position open.

email: info@redsquarevt.com

Community Integration Specialist Provide support and services to person with developmental disabilities. Part-time - 10 hours/week.

PLANET FITNESS, The Judgment Free Zone, is the

Send resume and cover letter to:

newest fitness club to arrive in South Burlington. We are looking for happy, fun, fast-paced people for a part-time front desk/membership consultant position Tuesday-Friday, 1-7pm and Saturday, 9am-3pm. A love of people and customer service experience preferred. Reliability is mandatory. Advancement opportunities available! Please send resumes to jessiedricker@planetfitness.com or inquire at our South Burlington pre-sale trailer to become a part of our wicked cool staff.

HR, Lamoille County Mental Health Services 275 Brooklyn Street, Morrisville, VT 05661

The Burlington Childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Space is hiring! We are seeking: A Full-time Infant Toddler Teacher. Prefer a Bachelorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s degree in Early Childhood Education or related field, minimum of an Associateâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s degree in ECE or related field. Experience in a center setting strongly preferred.

A Full-time Infant Toddler Teaching Assistant. Minimum of a CDA plus at least two years experience in a center setting required.

Both positions offer competitive wages and benefits. Email resumes to Erinn Simon at: esimon@burlingtonchildrensspace.org Positions open until filled, but donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t wait because weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re great!

EOE

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Technology Park (off of Kimball Ave.) 30 Community Drive, South Burlington www.planetfitness.com

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Are you looking for a fun and exciting place to work this winter?

CHITTENDEN SOUTH SUPERVISORY UNION

HSCC and all our furry friends are looking for energetic team players to fill the following positions:

2005-2006 Non-Certified Positions

Dependable individuals with a passion for animals needed to assist in the daily care and cleaning of our animals and facility. Work on an incredible team and spend your day with some of the sweetest four-legged friends youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll ever meet! Weekend work a must, prior animal care a plus. Application available at HSCC or online: www.chittendenhumane.org. Full and part-time positions possible.

Williston School District PARAEDUCATORS Williston School District Special Education Department has several paraeducator positions available for experienced applicants. If you want to make a difference with children, and gain valuable experience, consider joining our special education team. Pay rate is competitive, benefits are included. Apply to: Williston School, 195 Central School Drive, Williston, VT, 05495, Attn: Cindy Morin, Special Education Office Manager. Questions? Call Cindy at 879-5845.

Charlotte Central School SPECIAL EDUCATION ASSISTANT Charlotte Central School is currently looking for a Special Education Assistant to work with students in the primary level. Hours are 8 a.m. to 3:15 p.m., M-F. This position is a school year position for an individual interested in gaining valuable experience and training in a supportive environment with competitive pay and benefits. Please mail your resume to: Charlotte Central School, attn: Kathie Wagner, 408 Hinesburg Road, Charlotte, VT 05445. Resumes may also be emailed to kwagner@cssu.org. For more information, call 425-2771, ext. 156.

ANIMAL CARE TECHNICIANS

FRONT DESK/LOBBY OPERATIONS

Effective multitasker needed to manage front desk/lobby operations including: visitor greeting and sign-in, answering and returning calls, volunteer coordination, intake & adoption scheduling, and administrative support â&#x20AC;&#x201C; all with a smile! Tuesday through Saturday schedule. Please submit resume and cover letter with wage requirements.

ANIMAL BEHAVIOR COUNSELOR/HUMANE INVESTIGATOR

Skill and experience needed to help assess and work with animals both in our care and after placement. This position will focus 3/4 time on animal behavior and 1/4 time responding to calls and reports of potential animal neglect. Commitment to humane education a must. Please submit resume and cover letter with wage requirements.

Submit all applications/resumes to:

Humane Society of Chittenden County 142 Kindness Court, South Burlington, VT 05403 or fax/email to: 802.860.5868 or bestfriends@chittendenhumane.org

Join the team at Stowe Mountain Resort and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll have all the fun you can handle this winterâ&#x20AC;Śalong with skiing and riding at the ski capital of the east, for free! Stowe is currently hiring for the following seasonal positions:

â&#x20AC;˘ Arrival/Departure Attendants â&#x20AC;˘ Bell Staff â&#x20AC;˘ Daycare/Child care providers â&#x20AC;˘ Food Preparation â&#x20AC;˘ Lift Attendants â&#x20AC;˘ Lift Operators â&#x20AC;˘ Line Cooks â&#x20AC;˘ Lodging Front Desk â&#x20AC;˘ Mountain Access Stewards â&#x20AC;˘ Retail Sales Associates - evenings â&#x20AC;˘ Servers â&#x20AC;˘ Shipping/Receiving Clerk Our company values are built around awareness, attitude and accountability. We are looking for enthusiastic team players to join us in providing our guests with a superior recreational experience and an attitude of constant improvement and excellence.

Great seasonal benefits, including free ski pass! Stowe Mountain Resort is an Equal Opportunity Employer.

Check out our website http://www.stowe.com for more information on available positions. Submit your resume directly to jobs@stowe.com.

Stowe Mountain Resort - Human Resources 5781 Mountain Road, Stowe, VT 05672 802-253-3541

54B | december 14-21, 2005 | SEVEN DAYS | employment@sevendaysvt.com

7D CLASSIFIEDSEMPLOYMENT PHOTO: MATTHEW THORSEN

With the help of Seven Days, we’ve hired an office manager, a program coordinator, and financial coordinator. Of all the advertising we did to fill these jobs, Seven Days was far and away the main source for our job applicants.

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JIM MENDELL COMMON GROUND CENTER

seven days. it works.

employment@sevendaysvt.com | SEVEN DAYS | december 14-21, 2005 | 7D Classifieds 55B

EMPLOYMENT

Your best bet.

SEVEN DAYS

JOIN THE REVOLUTION! Bring your drive and entrepreneurial spirit to Verizon Information Services. We're transforming communication services into powerful new tools that bring buyers and sellers together like never before. You know us as SuperPages, but there is so much more to our story. Ready to add to it?

Then join us - and discover sales potential only we can offer.

LAMOILLE AMBULANCE SERVICE Burlington operations Need to place an ad?

Call

Michelle Brown

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SENIOR ADVERTISING ACCOUNT REP – (TELEPHONE SALES)

Candidate will sell print and online directory advertising to business customers. Requires 1-2 years’ commissioned sales experience and PC proficiency. Bachelor’s degree preferred. Salary and commission targeted at $70K.With the SuperPages print and online resources and technologies, your dream and our goals converge. Join the best of the best. Promotion-from-within, progressive benefits and growth potential are just a few of our attributes. Now we’re interested in hearing yours.

is seeking

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EMTsNeed to place Call Michelle Brown

to fill both full and part-time 8-hour shift openings.

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Clean driving record, motivated and team-oriented encouraged t ad? Callindividuals Michelle Brown 865-1020 x 21 e @ s e v to e apply. n d a y s v t . c o m

Need to place an ad?

Pay will be based on level of experience.

ad? Call Michelle Brown 865-1020 x 21 Call 800-639-2082.

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Submit your resume and explore the career opportunities at: www.Verizon.com/superpagesjobs or fax: (866) 255-4234 Verizon is an equal opportunity/affirmative action employer supporting workforce diversity. M/F/D/V.

call Michelle Brown 865-1020 x 21

employment: NOW HIRING FOR POSTAL FULL-TIME 1:1 LIVE-IN ELDER HR MANAGER, Williamson, NY, employment@sevendaysvt.com POSITIONS. $18.50-$59/hr. Full CARE. 74-year-old woman with Cadbury Schweppes is looking

135 PEARL NIGHTCLUB/ ssifieds.com

CABARET has openings for: Experienced Security/Door Staff.

Nightclub/bar experience a must. Job requirements: Please be open minded, have strong communication skills, ability to insure peace and safety of the establishment, strong hosting skills. This is an excellent opportunity for someone who wants to be part of a community-based entertainment venue. Please call Robert Toms at 802-863-2343 to set up an interview. c$1750hWEEKLY e INCOME! l l Nationwide company now hiring home mailers! Easy work! $50 cash hiring bonus. Written guarantee! Free info. Call, 1-800242-0363, ext. 4213 (24 hrs).

(AAN CAN) ADULT ENTERTAINMENT: $500 bonus. Club and show work. Pure Gold, 802-865-3933.

AUTO BODY REPAIR TECHNICIAN: Waterbury area. Need skills in full spectrum frame work to finish. Need own tools.

Paid holidays and vacation, reimbursement plan, medical and uniforms. Pay commensurate with skill level. Email majestic auto@adelphia.net or call 802244-5465.

CARPENTERS AND PAINTERS: Experienced with own tools, fulltime, year-round, subs possible.

Call Steven at Polli Construction Group, 802-865-9839.

CLERICAL/ADMINISTRATIVE POSITIONS. US Government. $12-$48/hr. Full benefits/paid training. Work available in areas like Homeland Security, Law Enforcement, Wildlife, more!

1-800-320-9353, x2001. (AAN CAN) COMPUTER AND NETWORK REPAIR tech needed part-time.

Must be friendly and have car.

Send resume to info@pinecom puters.biz.

DANCERS WANTED to perform at bachelor parties, birthdays and private parties. Work available. No experience necessary.

802-658-1464.

DELIVERY/WAREHOUSE HELP NEEDED to stage and deliver commercial building materials.

Great benefits, 401k, profit sharing. Full-time plus. John or Brian, 802-658-3730.

DOCTOR’S ASSISTANT POSITION available in a growing family wellness practice in Cambridge, Vermont. Our ideal candidate will be a positive and energetic self-starter with excellent people skills, superior computer skills and the ability to learn quickly. Previous positive @ with s chiropractic e vcare experience is an asset. Please apply by phone at 802-644-2260.

DRIVERS WITH LATE-MODEL vehicles possessing entertainment and MC qualities wanted to host shows with exotic dancers.

802-658-1464.

ENTRY-LEVEL PLANNER/ DESIGNER position open at LandWorks, interdisciplinary planning and design firm in Middlebury. GIS and Mac computer skills desirable. Writing and graphic skills a plus; salary negotiable. Full-time position with benefits. Respond via email at info@ landworksvt.com.

ENVIRONMENTAL/CIVIL ENGINEER: Experience w/VT and NH petroleum remediation, stormwater, and water/wastewater regulations. Environmental scientist - field position for motivated individual with BS in engineering, geology or related field.

Small environmental firm in Stowe looking for well-organized, motivated individuals to complement our existing staff.

Send resume to: bross.rea@ stoweaccess.com or R.E.A. PO Box 1533 Stowe, VT 05672.

FIELD ORGANIZER sought to manage marijuana policy reform work in Vermont for respected organization. Public speaking and organizing experience required. $40 K-$50 K. Please see www.mpp.org/jobs.

FRONT DESK HELP NEEDED for Burlington waterfront men’s salon. Part-time hours. Tuesdays and Thursdays, 11-7. Every other Saturday, 11-4. Please call 5984378.

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moderate-severe dementia in need of compatible female companion/caregiver with calm, flexible, mature disposition.

Multigenerational home includes two young grandchildren.

Experience and/or training in caring for persons with dementia preferred. Driving, weekends, references and background check required. NS/pets. Room and salary. Starksboro. Eves: 802453-8480. eFULL-TIME n PERMANENT d a y SALES, inventory, stove installations. Good starting salary and benefits. Stove and Flag Works, Williston. EEO. 802-878-5526.

GALLAGHER FLYNN & COMPANY, LLP is a growing professional services firm providing clients with tax, audit, and business consulting services. Are you hoping to join a solid team in a professional, friendly office environment in downtown Burlington? Accountant, small business group, seasonal: The ideal candidate for this position would have strong general ledger maintenance skills and experience with period end closings. Must be familiar with financial reporting; including GAAP financial standards and tax preparation. This position will begin in mid-January and end mid-April. All candidates for this position will possess: solid communication, mathematical and computer skills. Flexibility, team attitude and attention to detail.

Interested candidates should fax, email, or mail their resume in confidence (no phone calls please) to: Jennifer Jeffrey Gallagher, Flynn & Company, LLP, PO Box 447 Burlington, VT 05402. Fax: 802-651-7289, email: jjeffrey@gfc.com.

GULLIVERS DOGGIE DAYCARE now hiring! Athletic, hardworking individuals. AM and afternoon hours, desk and outside.

Apply in person. Rte. 59, Industrial Ave., Williston.

HAIRSTYLIST NEEDED: Parttime or full-time. Busy downtown Burlington location. Call 518-588-8869, leave message.

for an HR manager for their NY plant to implement and maintain HR initiatives, with the manufacturing teams to successfully deliver its contract commitments. You will be accountable for employee relations, performance management, capability and organization development, recruitment, and training for three sites. We seek someone with a minimum of 5-10 yrs HR experience in a CPG environsment,vBachelor’s t degree . incHR, o labor relations and contract negotiations exp., strong negotiation skills a plus, previous supervisory experience a must.

Relocation available. Please apply online to www.cadbury schweppesna.com. EOE M/F/D/V. (AAN CAN) JANITORIAL: FULL-TIME, Temco Facility Services, an international leader in facilities services, has an immediate full-time, 2nd shift lead position available.

Must have experience with hard floor surfaces and carpet care; including buffing, stripping, waxing, and carpet cleaning and shampooing, $10-$12/hour.

Please call 802-769-4263 for appointment. EOE JANITORIAL: Housekeepers needed for permanent part-time early morning positions for an upscale retail store. Retirees welcome! Must have a clean police report. EOE OUTSOURCE PARTNERS. 1-866-529-2095, ext. 4.

MOVIE EXTRAS, actors, models!

Make $100-$300/day. No experience required. FT/PT. All looks needed! 1-800-714-7565.

MOVIE EXTRAS: Earn $150$300/day. All looks/types needed. No experience necessary. TV, music videos, commercials, film, print. Call toll-free 7 days! 1800-260-3949, ext. 3025. (AAN CAN) NOW HIRING: Companies desperately need employees to assemble products at home. No selling, many hours. $500 weekly potential. Info 1-985-6461700 DEPT. VT-6811.

benefits/paid training and vacations. No experience necessary.

1-800-584-1775. Public announcement reference #5001.

(AAN CAN).

PART-TIME DELI HELP NEEDED. Flexible hours, weekends a must. Apply in person at M.T. Bellies Deli, 340 Dorset St., South Burlington, 05403.

PART-TIME MERCHANDISERS NEEDED: For Burlington, South Burlington, Colchester, Williston mto service the greeting areas card department in retail locations for a.m., early p.m., weekdays. Flexible, positive work environment. Requires lifting, up to 50 lbs. $7.15/hour to start.

Higher pay rate paid based on merchandising experience. Call Susan, 802-233-1477.

PROPERTY REPAIR AND MAINTENANCE ASSOCIATE. Seeking a reliable, bright and enthusiastic individual. Good salary and benefit package. Experience in carpentry, painting and general property repair desired. Resumes only. Mail to: Melinda Moulton, Main Street Landing, One Main Street, Burlington, Vermont 05401.

SNOW PLOW DRIVERS AND SNOW SHOVELERS WANTED! Please call Tony at 802-9852526 or 802-863-7900.

STATEWIDE DISABILITY RIGHTS ORGANIZATION seeking detail-oriented, highly efficient individual with database experience. Familiarity with File Maker aplus. Candidates must have excellent organizational and problem solving skills.

Duties include managing Peer Advocacy and Community Outreach Programs and supervising multiple staff. Highly accurate record keeping, budget and grants management, and reporting skills required. Competence with word processing and an ability to work in a team atmosphere are also a must. This is a full-time position with a salary range of $3-$33,000, Per year

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with a generous benefit package.

Personal experience with a disability is preferred. Please submit resume and cover letter by 5 p.m., January 15, Vermont Center for Independent Living, ATTN: Pat Dowers, Program Director, 11 East State Street, Montpelier, VT 05602. VCIL is an EOE/affirmative action employer. We provide reasonable accommodations in the recruitment and employment of persons with disabilities THE ASSOCIATION OF ALTERNATIVE NEWSWEEKLIES is hiring freelance writers for its website, aan.org. If interested, please send a cover letter, work experience and writing sample to amyg@aan.org. (AAN CAN).

TWO MALE MODELS NEEDED in Barre for a brochure/Internet ad shoot. Brochure will be for a massage center advertisement.

Models will need to be well defined and well tanned. Please apply by sending your information and photos to: model@echoridgeretreat.com.

VETERINARY TECHNICIAN WANTED. The Animal Hospital of Hinesburg is looking for an experienced veterinary technician to join our team. Candidate must be energetic, a team player and compassionate. Good communication skills and a positive attitude is a must. Competitive salary, good benefit package and vacation policy. Send resumes to: Animal Hospital of Hinesburg PO Box 356, Hinesburg, Vt. 05461.