sitting on the bathroom floor friendship as family

Ben grew up an only child but thanks to college now he has 3 sisters, fulfilling his childhood dream of having siblings. Junior year Sofia, Maya, Hannah, and Ben had each other’s schedules memorized to a T. Although they didn’t all officially live together, they practically did, spending any free moment they had, together.

As any family would, they gather around the living room, debrief their days, and perhaps put on a show. This simple act of gathering at home is a much needed release from the day. Someone, most likely Sof, will make the group a delicious meal in the kitchen which they will enjoy together after cozying themselves up somewhere in the apartment.

The living room, the kitchen, and sometimes even the bathroom floor,where these four used to routinely meet after classes to share a joint, talk, and listen to music, are all important spaces for coming together. A warm hug from Maya, a kind smile from Hanah, big sisterly advice from Sof, and a ring of laughter from Ben decorate the spaces, coloring the walls and their hearts, making it home.

In college I learned the value of a chosen family. Living away from home for the first time makes us realize how integral having a support system is. This support system transcends blood relations, and should comprise of people who make us feel seen, heard, and cared for fully, exactly as we are. Family doesn’t need to look like you or come from the same place as you to understand you, to love you.

Sofia Yanza(she/her)

22, North Brandford, CT

Class of 2023

Maya Pinney(she/her)

22, Rutherford, NJ

Class of 2023

Hannah Jospeh(she/her)

22, Santa Clarita, CA

Class of 2023

Ben Averia

22, Fairfax, VA

Class of 2023

Coming into college, Hannah Joseph was worried about only being surrounded by white people. Attending a PWI was daunting. She knew from the start she would need to be somewhat intentional about making friends of color and placing herself in the right environments to meet people who shared her background. To her surprise, the first friend circle she fell into was made up entirely of students of color, one being Ben Averia, who is still one of her best friends to date. While she is still grateful to have been surrounded by a community of other students of color so early on in her college experience, in hindsight, the group lacked any real compatibility or similarities. This became glaringly evident after they were separated due to COVID-19, and all came back as vastly different people.

“Looking back, I’m like, what did we even talk about?” Hannah laughed.

This is the reality for so many students of color at GW. Especially as freshmen, so much development and identity-building is still happening, which can leave friendships in a volatile place as individuals grow and evolve. Hannah and Ben felt this coming back to campus Junior year and realizing they no longer resonated with many of their friends.

The class of 2023, who had their Freshman year interrupted by the COVID-19 shutdown, were collectively eager to come back to campus once the university returned to in-person instruction.

“When I think of my college experience, it’s distinctly freshman year, and then everything else,” Ben said, referring to the vastly different nature of freshman year compared to post-COVID life back on campus.

Sofia Yanza was also looking forward to coming back to campus Junior year as a fresh start. She left GW in the spring of her freshman year, hating the school and wanting to transfer. She had started to make friends before COVID happened, but still felt that she “didn’t have anything solid.” However, it ended up being the encouragement from friends she had started to build, one being Maya Pinney, that convinced her to give GW another try and stay in hopes of building these connections further.

“It was the connections I had built that kept me here, and I’m glad they did,” Sofia said.

Maya was also very jarred by the interruption of freshman year by COVID. She vividly remembers sitting with Sofia and a few of their other new friends a few days before being kicked off campus, planning their first night out to the clubs. At this point in the semester, she had just started to feel like she was getting the hang of things and building relationships, so having it cut off so abruptly was disappointing. But similarly to Hannah, Ben, Sofia, and so many other students in her class year, the second chance she was granted junior year would not be something she squandered. She took the opportunity to build her friendships deeper and make new ones by putting herself out more than she ever had before.

“Last year to now has been so transformative for me,” Maya said, discussing the newfound confidence and outgoing personality she has fostered over the past year.

Maya, Hannah, Sofia, and Ben crossed paths in their dorm building. They were next-door neighbors living in District House when Hannah and Ben went over to knock on Maya and Sofia’s door to borrow something. Ever since, they haven’t left each other’s sides. Becoming friends allowed all of them to branch out and meet so many people through each other, expanding their circles significantly.

Although each of them comes from different ethnic and cultural backgrounds, just the shared identity of being students of color has been a huge bonding point for them. Ben expressed that being friends with the girls has helped him appreciate his culture more, and despite their different identities, he still feels beyond seen and understood for who he is