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I’M A TOOL
There are some pretty sharp tools in the shed, but that’s probably why they’re all the way out there. Pretty sharp doesn’t cut it. Neither does a tool with only one purpose. I’m that tool with more functions than you can ask for. I’m the one you wanted in your Y2K survival kit, between to the back-up floppies of Palm Pilot data and the MREs. I’m creative, resourceful, ready and able. You can even take me through airport security. But no matter what the TSA says,
I’m A Huge Tool.