THE ETIQUETTE GUIDE BOOK -Yasmin Adalia-
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Hello! Nice T o Meet You!
Please?
Sorry 2
T hank You
Excuse Me
Smile
You're Welcome
e t i l o P Be 3
This Book Belongs To...
THE ETIQUETTE GUIDE BOOK Yasmin Adalia
Inside This Book 6
10
First Impression
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Personal Conduct
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Grooming
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Personal Hygiene
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Telephone Courtesy
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Table Manner
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Table Manner
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DEAREST READERS, Whether it is fair or unfair, people will make character judgement about you based on your appearance, what you say, how you behave, especially how you handle social situations. This can be a crucial factor in social interaction, even this can determine how far or how high you can go in an organization. People need to know more about the rules that make interaction with others not only inoffensive, but comfortable and smooth. In a word: etiquette. Understand the etiquette rules will make you confident to approach new environment, meeting new people, attending dinner parties, entering new job and other social and proffesional situations. It will make you shine brighter than the others. The idea behind this book is to give information and knowledge about proper manners, both socially and professionally.
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First IMPRESS 10
ION
When we meet someone new, what does the person see first ? It’s our “initial appereance”. It happens very quickly, people form eleven impressions of you in the first seven seconds of contact. Example. : You are a neat person, you have a bad hair day, you are very polite / impolite, etc
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N A C W HO N E U L F N I I T S FIR
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WE CE ? N O I S S E R MP Attitude : positive & excited (shown simply by our face or by the words we use) Posture : graceful and elegant Pacing & Rapport : make relationship Non-verbal expression : eye contact, body language, facial expression Verbal expression : speak in the correct level of volume (4 Cs :control, clarity, caring, cheerfulness) Personal Presentation : what you wear
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Person Cond 1414
aL uct
If you want to be success in your relationship to others, you should be a reliable person, be able to perform and maintain your function in routine as well as unexpected circumstances.
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1. Punctuality Not to be late for work, meetings, workshops or seminars Do not make somebody’s waiting for you It is rude to be late for appointments, If you are delayed, ring ahead and apologize on arrival
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2. Apologizing Why is it hard to make an apology? Feeling that you are right, is one of the reason saying sorry isn’t easy. Everyone has their own ego, but if you decide to resolve the problem, then you should be ready to make an apology. Apology is an expression of regret for a fault. You might to have self-confidence and humble to admit to being wrong. It is not a sign of weakness.
sorry. 18
If you want to make an apology : Never mumble an apology Well spoken, clear apology will show good character
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3. WHITE LIES AND UNTRUTH
Lying is more a matter of morality than manners. The issue is whether it is permissible or acceptable to do so. With-hold the truth - If you can’t tell the truth, don’t say anything at all. Remember, if you choose to lie, you will need a good memory.
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what did I say earlier?
She really bought it?!
I think she knows that I'm lying
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GRO 22
G N I M O What is grooming ? Grooming is being neat and tidy, caring for physical appearance. We also have to choose the right dress for the right occasion. Try and select a dress, which compliments your figure (size and shape) and assets. Many women wear dresses based on particular fashion trend and look like a fashion disaster.
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APPLE
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PEAR
Hour
Glass
Banana
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APPLE The Apple Shape Body Type is unique to the full-figured form. Call yourself an apple body type if : Your upper body is noticeably larger than your lower body. Not only that, but if you were to gain five pounds, four of them would go to your waistline.
What to wear ? Wear shirts that reach lower than your waist, choose a slightly lower neckline to keep the eyes moving upwards. Pair that with a statement necklace for maximum effect.
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PEAR The Pear Shape Body Type is the most common female form. Call yourself a pear body type if : Your upper body is noticeably smaller than your lower body. If you were to gain five pounds, four of them would go to your hips and thighs.
What to wear ? Swing coat, A Line skirt, sleeveless, halter neck.
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Hour Glass The Full Hourglass Figure: Yes, it’s true. It is considered the ideal female form. But who qualifies? Call yourself an hourglass if : You’re very curvy with a clearly defined waist. If you were to gain five pounds, they would distribute evenly amongst your well proportioned curves
What to wear ? Every dress can be well suited. In this case, you can opt for perfect fitted dress.
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Banana The Banana / Rectangle Shape Body Type is easy to identify. Call yourself a banana / rectangle if: Your figure is straight up and down, without a lot of curves (no waist ). If you were to gain five pounds, they would distribute evenly throughout your frame.
What to wear ? Colour blocking (to create the illusion of a waist), open single breasted jackets, vests, soft fabric tops and matching skirts or pants.
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Influenced by character of the one who will wear it and occasion, there are five ways of getting dressed : Elegant, Sporty, Leisure, Conservative / Classic, Creative
Elegant Female :
Male:
Evening long dress or night gown
High quality cotton
Dark or glittering color
A classic color
Accessories, like necklace, earrings, bracelet, rings and hair-pin
A classic-cut shirt with double cufflinks and button accessories
Hair-do
A classic silk tie or a bow tie combined with a matching handkerchief
Âą 7cm high-heeled shoes
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haute-de-couture suit
SPORTY Female :
a minimalist chic dress. mini skirt trendy
Male:
jacket with zipper up to the neck. simple cut short pants. trendy
LEISURE Female : casual blouse combined with long/ short pants.
Male : Dressed in casual polo shirt combined with a match suit – long or short pants that shows his character/personality
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CONSERVATIVE Female : A classic evening - gown. Not really stylish, Indeed, has a firm character.
Male: A classic tie, combined with simple design accessories but still expensive. Suitable vest matched to the pants.. Shows strong character
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CREATIVE Female: A colorful dress combined with big furred- scarf or vest Eye-catching accessories
Male : Jeans Striped or plaid suit.
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Pers Hyg
onal iene
Personal Hygene is a part of Good Grooming. What is good grooming? Good grooming is a fresh, correct and tidy appearance. It can also be a clean, tidy and pleasant appearance
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IMPACT OF GOOD GROOMING Good grooming influences someone's personality, feelings and appearance. Moreover the value of a person is stated by his/her: Attitude & Personality (Friendliness, courtesy and manner) Personal communication with others. Health (no disease, fresh, fit) Body Language (eye contact, elegant, graceful).
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What is good health? Both body and mind must be in the best possible health. Good health is not only the absence of disease. If does not depend on the person’s height and weight but means that both the body and mind are in excellent condition, free from illness or tension.
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n i d e r e d i s n o c e b o t Things ygiene: personal h Teeth and Mouth Eyes Hands Nose and Ears Skin Hair
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Teeth and Mouth
The cleanliness and health of teeth and mouth are compulsory, because: Unhealthy mouth can cause a toothache. Smelly atmosphere while talking. Throat infections like bronchitis, pneumonia, earache and sinus.
Teeth must be cared as they may cause some difficulties, such as: Not able to chew food in a normal way. Headache or migraine Sleepless, not sleep well. Lack of good appetite. Tooth decay may get infected to the other body parts .
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HOW TO GET AVOID OF TOOTHACHE: Brush your teeth everyday. Not too much eating sweet food. Gargling after eating carbohydrate food. Dentist examined regularly. No eating too hot or too cold food. Chewing strongly during meal time.
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Eyes
Eyes are the most important parts of the body. Therefore: Eyes must be kept clean. Eyes must be washed frequently.
Things that must be avoided: Rubbing eyes with fingers. Reading while lying. Reading in the dark places. Reading in the car. Using eye lotion to widen the eyes.
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Nose & Ears
TIPS: Clean your nose. Sniff water into your nostrils. Lather up, or use a cleaning lotion, and reach from ear to ear, and hairline to under the chin. Clean your ears. Use either a thin washcloth, or your fingers to clean inside (use cotton buds), outside, and at the back of your ears.
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Hands Our hands are possibly the most unsafe serving equipment in the chain of infection in the entire service operation.
Hands should be: Washed with plenty of soap and water Preferably rinsed in running water. Hand washing should be done properly, or it will not be effective. Must be dried thoroughly by using a roller towel, a hot air drier or disposable paper towel.
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WHEN SHOULD WE WASH OUR HANDS ? Before beginning work and after a break. Before handling foods. After using the toilet. After handling raw foods, especially meat, fish and poultry. Whenever they are dirty
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Skin HOW TO HAVE HEALTHY SKIN ? Bath or Shower Regularly. Use mild soap and skin scrub (once a week to remove dead skin). Also, apply antiperspirant/deodorant daily, after washing to avoid body odor. Assess your workspace. Do you study or work in an environment that involves air-conditioning and heating for long periods of time? (lacking good ventilation ?) Have a fresh air as often as possible. Moisturize. It is important to moisturize skin no matter what; Use water as a humidifier. Drink water regularly, avoid having too much coffee Take breaks. It is important to take regular breaks from working at the desk, till or counter. De-stress. Stress can manifestly outwardly in the skin. It can lead to break-outs in the form of acne, dry skin, eczema, and other skin problems. Keep active. There is nothing better than exercise for healthy results.
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Hair FOR SHINY AND HEALTHY HAIR Use cooler water to wash and rinse your hair the last time. It closes up the hair cuticles if you use with cold water, locking in moisture. Wash your hair the recommended amount. Clean hair is healthy hair. Do not wash every day or you will ruin the hair’s cuticles. Use shampoo 2 times then pour conditioner, rub from the tips of your hair to the root covering all your hair. When you dry your hair, don’t rub it with the towel. Wet/damp hair is the weakest state. So, if you rub/dry it with a towel, there are major chances some will fall out. You can blot it. You could also dry it with a blow dryer, but not too often. It is best to let your hair dry naturally;
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If necessary use a heat protection spray which you spray on the hair while it is still wet and then blow dry, this will also protect hair from curlers/ straighteners etc. Dry hair carefully. Also do not brush your hair while it is wet- instead use a wide-toothed comb. Spray-on and leave-in conditioners help: leave-in conditioners penetrate deep into your hair cuticles and heal them more completely. Brush your hair properly. Don’t brush your hair too often or too much. Decide on the detangling tool(s) that are best for your hair. Generally, the thicker, coarser, or curlier the hair, the wider the comb teeth or brush bristles should be.
TEL CO 50
EPHONE URTESY
Everybody knows how to use the telephone. But not many people know how to use it to their best advantage.
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Handling the telephone When you talk in the telephone, you should : Sit on straight position Breath with stomach Keep the distance between the telephone microphone and your mouth (approximately 3-5 cm) Prepare some other things to support your job (telephone book, special number or address, information about your own job, calendar, price list, guide book) Prepare pen / pencil and note pad Pick up the telephone quietly Answer in as few ring as possible Never eat or drink Ask for permission when you put a caller on hold Avoid side conversation
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ANSWERS THE TELEPHONE Four steps of answering the telephone courteously: Greet the caller State your organization / company (department) Introduce yourself Offer your help
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USE YOUR BEST VOICE BY: Use Energy Pleasant Sounding Normal Rate of Speech Distinct Articulation Pitch Variation (Not too low / too high) Use Proper Stress Smiling Voice
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ENDING THE CALL Before you end the call, you should : Thank the caller / customer for calling Let the caller / customer know you appreciate his/her business Let the caller hang up the telephone first
... thank you
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Do’s : Pick up the phone within 2 rings Stop previous conversations Answer promptly, courteously, be attentive Be Friendly Correct address Speak clearly, appropriately & articulately
Don’ts : Interrupt the conversation Transfer a call without telling the caller Rush even under pressure Hit the table Chew gum, etc Use simply answer “yes”/“no” Let the guest hear unnecessary noise Forget to thank the guest
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table manner Nowhere are your manners more on display than at the dinner table.
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BASIC RULES Sit up straight (not rigidly, but avoid slouching). Keep your elbow off the table when eating. Do not talk with your mouth full of food. Do not wave around a fork or any utensil with food on it. Once you have put food on a utensil, eat it. Cut food into small, bite-sized pieces, one piece at a time. If you have something trapped between your teeth, don’t pick at it while at the table.
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OF DINING Eat slowly and chew it quitely. Reach for food that are easily within your reach. Ask others to pass food that are not near you. Always say “Please” and “Thank you” when food are passed to you when accepting or decline food. If you are eating in someone’s home, remember that someone prepared the meal, and compliment the cook. If you must leave the table during the meal or before everyone else has finished, excuse your self.
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UTENSILS Fork Knife Spoon
Fork
Arranged in order of their use. Once you have used a utensil, it should never put anywhere except on a plate
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Glass
Knife
Napkin
Plate
BASIC TABLE SETTING This type of set up is suitable for : Breakfast + Tea Cup A La Carte Menu + Soup Spoon
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ELABORATE / FULL TABLE SETTING
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Dinner Fork
Salad Fork
Butter Knife & Bread Plate
Salad Plate
Water
Dinner Plate
White Wine
Soup Spoon
Red Wine
Dinner Knife
Napkin
Dessert Spoon & Fork
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BREAD When bread is served, take some and put it on your bread and butter plate, if there is one, or on your dinner plate Put your napkin in your lap as soon as you sit down Fine dinning (the waiter may shake out your napkin and drape it across your lap for you)
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NAPKIN Put your napkin in your lap as soon as you sit down Fine dinning (the waiter may shake out your napkin and drape it across your lap for you)
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WHICH IS MY WATER, BREAD PLATE, NAPKIN??? Liquids on the right, solids on the left, you’ll never eat someone else’s bread again! That’s your coffee cup to the right of the plate, and your bread plate on the left! Your napkin is always placed somewhere within your dining territorial borders.
solid
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liquid
FINISH YOUR DINNER Put your utensils in the position of 04:20 or 05:25
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COMMUNIC CHANNEL 70
ATION If you select the wrong communication channel, you will risk offending, confusing, or irritating your audience.
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Communication The transfer of meaning among people
Sender Establishes a message, encodes the message and choose the channel to send it
Receiver Decodes the message and provides feedback to the sender
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TYPES OF COMMUNICATION CHANNEL Memos/Reports Email Instant Message Voice Mail Telephone Conversation Video Conferencing In – Person Conversation Face to Face Meeting
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BARRIERS TO EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION Physical barriers Language barriers Body Language barriers Perceptual barriers Organizational barriers Cultural barriers
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HOW EMAIL HAS ALTERED COMUNICATION? Now preferred medium for coordinating work Tends to increase communication volume Significantly alters communication flow Reduce some selective attention biases
PROBLEMS WITH EMAIL Communicates emotion poorly Reduces politeness and respect Inefficient for ambiguous, complex and novel situation Increases information overload
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How to Write and Send an E-mail ? Use a subject line Use emoticons and acronyms sparingly for business communications Write clearly and briefly Copy emails to others only if they really need the information Sleep on angry emails
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DON’T PUSH THAT SEND BUTTON ... Use e-mail only when it’s the most efficient channel for your need. Try your best to not print your e-mail. Send nothing over e-mail that must be error-free. Never delete names from your address book. Never forward chain e-mail. Never send e-mail when you’re furious or exhausted.
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SAVE
... yet! Don’t pass on rumor or innuendo about real people. Nor should you do so about companies you work for or may work for one day. Never substitute e-mail for a necessary face-to-face meeting. Your e-mail is hackable and retrievable, and it can be used againts you. Use only when absolutely necessary.
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REMEMBER THIS HIERARCHY
1. Meeting
2. Phone Call
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3. Voice Mail
4. E-mail
P.S:
E-mail is an extremely efficient form of communication when used sensibly-but be careful out there. It’s alitigator’s paradise.
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Your personal Notes
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Credits Harvard Business School Press (2005). Business Etiquette. United States of America: Harvard Business School Publishing. Mitchell, M (1996). The Complete Idiotâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Guide to Etiquette. United States of America: Alpha Books. Covey, Stephen R. (2002). Living the 7 Habits. Jakarta: Binarupa Aksara. Covey, Stephen R. (1989). The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. United States of America: Fireside. Lowndes, L (2006). How to Talk to Anyone. Singapore: Mc Graw Hill. Hubner, I e-mail 8 January, <irahubner@yahoo.com>
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Hello! Nice T o Meet You!
Please?
Sorry 86
T hank You
Excuse Me
Smile
You're Welcome
e t i l o P Be 87
What is Etiquette all About? How to make a great first impression? How to deal with dining situation? How to select the best communication channel? This book will give you tips, warnings, and valuable advice to help you along the way. So go on, get hands-on, this book is the answer!
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