This Is Toledo
PHILLIP THOMAS
A Frank Discussion of Race
C
By Erin Schoen Marsh
hildren learn in school that the Civil Rights Movement wiped out segregation and eliminated racism. The recent killings of Black men and women by white police officers tell a different story: racism was never eliminated. While perhaps more subtle, feelings of superiority remain powerful, pervasive, and systematic. Well-meaning white Americans latched onto the words of Martin Luther King, Jr., who said, “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.” Progressive white people claim they “do not see color,” yet that is a privilege afforded to those who are white. Black Americans live every day reminded of, and judged by, the color of their skin. Open listening The first step toward creating a just and equal world is to openly listen to the voices of all people— particularly those in the Black community— to educate ourselves about racism in America, and to then reflect on ways to help and support our Black community. Four Toledo residents share their stories here of how racism affects their lives, in both big and small ways. The current protests in Toledo have taught our community that racism and injustice are not issues relegated to “other” cities. As actor Will Smith said back in 2016, “Racism is not getting worse; it’s getting filmed.”
LEARN MORE Want to be involved in the #BlackLivesMatter movement locally? Check out the Community Solidarity Response Network of Toledo, or you can donate here. Ready to learn more? Read White Fragility: Why It’s So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism by Robin DiAngelo or I’m Still Here: Black Dignity in a World Made for Whiteness by Toledo-native Austin Channing Brown. Already read those? ABCNews listed other book resources here, and this website lists books for white readers. Want to be a white ally but overwhelmed on where to start? This working document lists resources for just about every stage and thinking pattern. Not sure how to address racism with your kids? National Geographic compiled suggestions for parents and NPR interviewed Jennifer Harvey, author of Raising White Kids: Bringing Up Children in a Racially Unjust America, about how to talk with white kids about raciallycharged events.
Quality Manager for a local food manufacturer, is originally from Ashtabula, Ohio (about 50 miles east of Cleveland) but has lived in Toledo for years. He is married with 5 kids: Jayden (18), Simon (17), Elijah (15), Sophie (14), and Kingston (10). What is one of your earliest race-related memories? It's pretty ironic... think I learned about racism through the eyes of those in my community when I was 7 or 8. Not that I wasn’t experiencing it...I just didn’t know what it was. My family, specifically my grandmother, never taught us to treat others any differently or never taught us that we were any different, although she lived through an era in the South where they were still oppressed and blatantly limited in access to basic human rights. As a 7- or 8-year-old, I began to first notice how differently people of color, people who looked like me, people I knew and loved, were treated and talked to differently by Caucasian-Americans. It was a feeling of unease…it was a feeling like we had done something wrong. When we would go into a store...the looks we would get. The way we would be addressed. The places we could go and not go. As I look back [to that time] as a child, I now can put a name to what I was feeling. How has your life been shaped/influenced by race? Race has been very influential in my life, for better and worse. Not having the same access to all the opportunities -- luxuries, financial literacy, generational wealth, positive social-economical outlook -- was not fair. It was not fair that I was judged based on the color of my skin and not the content of my character. It was frustrating that I felt that I had to be two times better than a Caucasian to gain a “seat at the table” and experience some of the same freedoms and opportunities that are freely given to others. What those obstacles ultimately did was make me develop into a better version of myself….It made we work harder, develop an attitude of excellence, become resourceful, think outside the box, and it pushed me to strive to always be the best. Now it allows me to use my experiences to prepare my children to develop these same characteristics and to also be there to help them push through those same barriers. The problem I see here is that I have to STILL use my experiences and knowledge to prepare them for how the world will treat them as persons of color in America.
For the full responses from Alisa Gafeney, John Robinson II, Molly Klima, and Phillip Thomas, read our extended version online. 18
• JULY/AUGUST 2020 • www.toledoparent.com
Favorite movie? Lion King Favorite comfort meal? Spaghetti Favorite Toledo restaurant? Mancy’s Italian Favorite spot in Toledo? Toledo Zoo When you get some alone time, what’s your go-to activity? Working out Describe Toledo in a sentence? A place of promise. Describe your life in 5 words or less. Journey of Self Reflection. A book everyone should read? Bible Who is someone you admire? Barack Obama
How is what you say to and/or teach your children different than what a white parent may say to and/or teach his/her white children? I think conversations, teachings, and understandings are very much different for Black parents with their children than white parents. Why do I say this? Because I should know...I have both. The worldview I present to my children is consistent and the same: we want them to be happy, treat others with love, and give back more on this Earth than they have taken. Although we give them the same worldview, we talk differently on how the world will view them. Where I worry about what time my stepchildren who are white will be home when they go out, I worry if my Black sons will come home at all. When I started preparing the older ones to drive, I told my stepson, who is white, about the laws of the road. I told my son, who is Black, what to do if you are pulled over by a cop. While we encourage our children who are white to express their freedoms and be individuals, I encourage my Black sons to know their rights, know their freedoms, be an individual but know when to express yourself and where. Although all children face many pressures today because of the age of social media, my Black sons will face all of those same things but also that the color of their skin may blind people to who they are and what pain, suffering, needs, and desires they may have.
