Weddings

Wedding

Spring

Addison Independent, Thursday, March 30, 2017

Issue

Stay relaxed through the planning stages

BY CHRISTY LYNN SHOREHAM — Abby Goodrich and Joe Murphy grew up one town away from each other. She in Shoreham, he in Orwell. Abby’s mother, Leslie Goodrich, was Joe’s teacher in elementary school.

But despite their proximity, Abby and Joe never knew each other growing up. Kids from Shoreham travel to Middlebury for middle school and high school, those from Orwell go to Fair Haven.

Instead, the two met years later at a wedding.

Abby had been hired as a wedding photographer for the event. Joe was the best man.

The two saw a lot of each other throughout the day and enjoyed the easy conversations that struck up between them.

When Abby went home her mother asked her how the wedding went.

“It was good,” she said. “I think I might have met a guy there.”

Abby gave her mom Joe’s name and her mother shrieked with glee. “I love Joe Murphy. You could definitely marry him!”

And she was right. Four years later, that unknowing statement became reality.

The two were engaged on September 23, 2015. They both loved the idea of a fall wedding, so set a date for October 1 of the following year. At the time Abby was back in school studying to become a massage therapist and was also working, so she needed a lot of planning time.

THE SITE The couple started their planning by touring wedding barns and sites where they might like to host their special event. But most were out of their budget and didn’t feel quite right.

One day Abby came across a Facebook post from a local friend who was recently married and raved about an inexpensive rental option for tents, tables and chairs. She learned about Calvin Loven, who runs a small rental business supplying tents with clear sides, handmade tables, folding white event chairs and dance floors perfect for weddings.

“I realized we could have our wedding right at my parents’ farm for less (See Murphy Page 3)

Contents Stay relaxed through the planning stages..................................................1 The Knot reveals the 2016 Real Weddings Study results.......................4 The secret drawer.............................................................................................6 Places to Get Married......................................................................................9 Regional differences in weddings ...............................................................9 Tips for guests looking for lodging.............................................................10 How to organize wedding planning............................................................10 How to build your wedding budget.............................................................11

Abigail Goodrich and Joseph Murphy got hitched at the Goodrichs’ farm in Shoreham last fall.

Photo by Barb Wood, Riverwood Photography

PAGE 2 —

Spring Weddings Addison Independent, Thursday, March 30, 2017

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Spring Weddings Addison Independent, Thursday, March 30, 2017 — PAGE 3

Murphy (Continued from Page 1) money than we could have it anywhere else. So it was a go.”

Sweet Butter Churn Farm in Shoreham was a dairy farm originally, but when Abby was growing up it also housed 200 head of sheep. Abby grew up actively involved in the farm and a committed member of her local 4-H chapter.

But the farm work took its toll on Abby’s father, Stephen Goodrich, and after back surgery he decided to sell all the animals and retire to a new job (he is now a mail carrier for Shoreham).

When the farm was deemed the site for Abby and Joe’s wedding, a new purpose was given to the property. The Goodrich family worked to clean up the area, removing an underused pool and a dilapidating barn to open a wide and beautiful view over the valley.

THE HELP Abby and Joe were fortunate to have very supportive family members willing to help out with all steps of the planning process, so they decided not to hire a wedding planner or much outside help.

“We had both my mom and my mother-in-law, as well as his sister, cousins, his grandma and a lot of aunts and uncles willing to help out,” Abby said. “We really saw this as a blending of two families and so everyone was willing to take part.”

As a result, sending out over 200 save the date announcements and invitations turned into an evening of getting together with a bunch of family and forming an assembly line where each person had a task and together they quickly worked their way to completion.

For the day-of, Abby and Joe worked to delegate tasks to as many extended family members as they could, relieving themselves of the details so they could enjoy the day.

Abby’s mother prepared the drinks. She had all the fixings prepared ahead of time and was ready to go. Her aunts took care of appetizers, prepping them ahead of time and skirting off immediately following the ceremony to get them out and ready for guests at the reception.

The couple did hire The Wheel in Benson to cater the reception dinner, but guests were responsible for tossing their own paper plates and plastic silverware following the meal. Trash collection was delegated to uncles.

“In the end it really flowed pretty nicely and was just what we wanted. It had a real family vibe, which worked well for us.”

THE DRESS In the search for her perfect dress, Abby made an appointment at Vows Bridal Outlet outside of Boston, Mass. But a week or so before her appointment, Abby found herself on other errands in Burlington and decided to stop into David’s Bridal just for a peek.

She tried on several gowns and found one she really liked.

In her excitement, Abby called her mom, sister-in-law and mother-

in-law and the four of them returned to David’s the following day to view Abby’s dress.

No one liked it.

But they encouraged Abby to try on some others and, lo and behold, they found the perfect one!

She cancelled her appointment at Vows, but the four decided to go to Boston anyway — just for fun.

IT ALL COMES TOGETHER The day of the wedding started our foggy and romantic, Abby recalled.

As the sun rose the fog lifted and it was clear their outdoor ceremony was going to come off without a hitch.

Around 160 guests traveled to Sweet Butter Churn Farm, many from Vermont, but others from Massachusetts, Connecticut and New Hampshire as well.

The ceremony site was decorated with mums, pumpkins, hay bales and fall flowers in the day’s colors of cranberry, cream and sage. The tents stood on the ridge behind the ceremony site, overlooking the stunning pastoral views. Handmade signs welcomed guests to the site and directed them to the open seating.

The six bridesmaids were split wearing either short cranberry dresses, or long grey gowns, but perhaps not for the aesthetic reasons you might assume with contrasting colors to enhance the visual pop of the wed-

Abby and Joe pose under their wedding arbor with parents Steve and Leslie Goodrich to their right and Carol Murphy and Bill Kirkpatrick to their left. Abby largely credits their smooth planning to the incredible help they received from family and friends.

Photo by Barb Wood, Riverwood Photography

With an October 1 wedding, much of the decorations chosen and the Murphy ceremony were fall themed. They used hay bales, pumpkins, mums and ornamental cabbage to decorate the site, which added to the quintessential farm scene while also staying within a modest budget.

Photo by Barb Wood, Riverwood Photography

ding party.

Instead, midway through the planning process, three of the six bridesmaids announced to Abby that they were pregnant.

Now, this might have stressed some brides out. Abby had already picked out six matching cranberry dresses for all the bridesmaids and these announcements forced her to scrap that vision.

“But I just said, ‘Oh crud, three of the girls are now pregnant. What do we do?’ Of course the answer was we buy new dresses and try to make it look intentional.”

She decided rather than try to match a specific color cranberry, she could match the groomsmen’s grey suits.

“I kind of went with what happened and got OK with it all.”

The groomsmen and fathers of the wedding couple were dressed in sharp grey suits from Rutland’s Mc-

Neil & Reedy, with cranberry ties to match the ladies.

Abby’s hair and makeup was done by her cousin, and she carried a formal bouquet crafted by florist Karen Hescock at Bloomers Garden Flowers.

The cake was made by Abby’s best friend and to accompany it her mother and mother-in-law made 300 homemade whoopee pies.

They also built a fire outside of the tent for roasting marshmallows to enjoy while the autumn evening chill set in. Stephen Goodrich offered wagon and tractor rides until dark.

Guests each received a small container of maple syrup to commemorate the occasion, prepared and donated by a friend of Joe’s who is a local sugarer.

“That’s kinda how we wanted it,” Abby said. “Just a celebration of us becoming one and celebrating the new and what’s to come.”

ONE PIECE OF ADVICE “I tried not to stress, that was my biggest thing,” Abby said, reflecting back on the process. “I could have panicked along the way, but I was able to let things go and get around them.”

In the end, Abby and Joe felt they got exactly what they had wanted and were able to avoid much of the anxiety that some couples feel around their wedding.

The one time Abby nearly lost that calm and cool was the day of the wedding when her father called her into his room before the ceremony.

He couldn’t find his pants.

“He’s probably only worn a suit a couple of times in his life, so he’s not really used to it. But in that moment I just starting thinking, ‘Oh no. This can’t really be happening right now.’

“But then Mom came in and found the pants right there on the hanger, hiding under the suit coat.”

Lights in the wedding tents glow from the ridge at the Goodrichs’ Sweet Butter Churn Farm, creating a beautiful scene to view from the fire pit or ceremony site below.

Photo by Barb Wood, Riverwood Photography

PAGE 4 —

Spring Weddings Addison Independent, Thursday, March 30, 2017

The Knot reveals the 2016 Real Weddings Study results NEW YORK – The Knot, the leading wedding brand and marketplace, on Feb. 2 released the results of The Knot 2016 Real Weddings Study. The 10th annual comprehensive report, the largest of its kind, surveyed nearly 13,000 US brides and grooms married in 2016 to uncover the financial spending habits and trends of real weddings in America. This study includes national and regional statistics on the average cost of a wedding, wedding vendor cost, how couples budget for their big day, the average number of wedding guests, spend per guest, wedding style trends and other key statistics related to weddings in America.

In 2016, the average cost of a wedding reached an all-time high at $35,329, while the number of guests dropped. That correlation means spend per guest increased, showing that couples are spending with a focus on guests. Custom guest entertainment has more than tripled, from 11% to 41% since 2009, with photo booths (78%), games (18%), musical performances (12%) and fireworks (8%) at the top of the list.

Not only are guests being entertained at weddings, but this year couples reported that nearly 20% of their guests hooked up at or after their wedding.

“Wedding spend continues to rise, but at the same time, guest

lists are shrinking as couples spend more per guest to create an unforgettable experience for those closest to them,” said Kellie Gould, editor in chief of The Knot. “Couples are also using their wedding day to make their first big statement as a couple.

From invitations to the reception band, couples are spending more to put their personal stamp on every detail.”

GUEST EXPERIENCE IS TOP OF MIND AS GUEST SPEND RISES WHILE GUEST COUNT DROPS. Showing just how much couples are focused on creating the ultimate guest experience, the average number of wedding guests in 2016 is down to 141, compared to 149 in 2009, while the cost per wedding guest is up to $245, compared to $194 in 2009. To create a completely memorable experience for guests, couples are amping up the entertainment and personalization. Seventy-five percent of all couples have at least one signature wedding element (up from 66% in 2008), such as a signature cocktail (24%). Custom guest entertainment has more than tripled, from 11% to 41% since 2009, with photo booths (78%), games (18%), musical performances (12%) and fireworks (8%) at the top of the list.

Also on the rise are cigar rolling stations, wine and liquor tastings

and dance performers. Don’t be surprised to see aerialists, acrobats, live painters or gospel choirs this year as 2017 wedding trends reach new heights in guest entertainment.

WED TECH HELPS CAPTURE EACH AND EVERY MOMENT. As technology has become a part of our everyday lives, 22% of couples incorporated some type of technology into their wedding day including: GoPros in bridal bouquets to capture the walk down the aisle, drones to take aerial wedding footage and live streaming video to share the wedding day with loved ones who couldn’t attend. Sixty-four percent of couples created a wedding hashtag and shared with guests on their personalized wedding website (48%), table tent cards (32%), ceremony program (20%) and wedding invitation (19%).

COUPLES ARE SPENDING OVER PLANNED BUDGETS WHILE PARENTS TAKE ON MOST OF THE WEDDING COSTS. Tradition rings true with parents paying for a majority of today’s weddings. On average, the bride’s parents contribute 44% of the overall wedding budget, the bride and groom contribute 42%, and the groom’s parents contribute 13% (others account for the remaining 2%). In 2016,

Category Overall Wedding (excluding honeymoon) Venue (reception hall) Photographer Wedding/Event Planner Reception Band Reception DJ Florist/Décor Videographer Wedding Dress Groom’s Attire and Accessories Wedding Cake Ceremony Site Ceremony Musicians Invitations Transportation Favors Rehearsal Dinner Engagement Ring Catering (price per person) Officiant

10% of couples paid for the wedding entirely by themselves, and 8% of couples didn’t contribute any finances to the wedding budget. Most couples (89%) say the economy did not affect wedding plans and 47% (up from 42% in 2011) report spending more than they planned for.

MOBILE WEDDING PLANNING DOUBLES AS MORE COUPLES ARE PLANNING ON THE GO. In 2016, couples using smartphones for wedding planning activities more than doubled from 42% in 2014 to 90% in 2016.

The most popular mobile wedding planning activity: browsing wedding gowns (62%). Researching wedding vendors (51%, up

2015 National Average Spend $32,641 $14,788 $2,618 $1,996 $3,833 $1,171 $2,300 $1,824 $1,469 $269 $575 $2,089 $703 $445 $792 $267 $1,296 $5,871 $68 $273

2016 National Average Spend $35,329 ↑ $16,107 ↑ $2,783 ↑ $2,037 ↑ $4,156 ↑ $1,245 ↑ $2,534 ↑ $1,995 ↑ $1,564 ↑ $280 ↑ $582 ↑ $2,197 ↑ $755 ↑ $462 ↑ $859 ↑ $268 ↑ $1,378 ↑ $6,163 ↑ $71 ↑ $278 ↑

from 31% in 2014), using online planning tools (43%, up from 21% in 2014), creating a personal wedding website (25%, up from 14% in 2014) and using an online RSVP service (20%, up from 7% in 2014) are also top of mind wedding activities on mobile.

HOOK UPS AND GETTING DRUNK, OH MY. Looking for a love match? You may just find one at the next wedding you attend. Nineteen percent of couples say some of their guests hooked up during or after their wedding, with 4% reporting that guests who met at their wedding are now in a committed relationship. Guests aren’t the only ones indulging in reception liba(See Page 5, The Knot)

Spring Weddings Addison Independent, Thursday, March 30, 2017 — PAGE 5

The Knot (Continued from previous page) tions. Fifteen percent of brides admit they got drunk at their wedding and 18% say their groom got drunk as well. Nine percent of brides reported that she, or both her and her significant other, had an ex-lover at their wedding. Four percent of survey respondents admitted that their best man insulted someone during his toast.

LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION. Ceremony and reception locations are becoming even more important as couples plan a personalized wedding that’s a true reflection of their personalities and relationship together. Fortyeight percent said that having a reception venue with a scenic backdrop or locale was the top priority, while having both an indoor and outdoor space was most important for 30% of couples. As unexpected places to wed are on the rise, only 26% had a ceremony in a religious institution (down from 41% in 2009). Hosting weddings at farms, barns and ranches increased from 2% in 2009 to 12% in 2016, and historic buildings and homes rose in popularity from 9% in 2009 to 13% in 2016.

Other popular non-traditional ceremony sites include beach houses, public gardens, wineries

and museums.

COUPLES CONTINUE TO WED FAR FROM HOME. Only 20% of couples considered their wedding a destination wedding, down from 24% in 2011. Of those who had a US destination wedding, 49% got married 200 miles or more from where they lived at the time of their wedding. Nearly 13% of destination wedding couples host a second party when they return home for friends and family who weren’t able to attend. There are more than 340,000 destination weddings each year with 89% (up from 77% in 2015) taking place in the continental US and 11% (down from 23% in 2015) at international destinations. Top locales include Hawaii (35%), California (14%), Florida (12%), Caribbean (27%) and Mexico (10%).

FALL WEDDINGS DOMINATE. Summer weddings still remain a popular season to say “I do,” but fall has taken the top spot with 40% (up from 30% in 2009) of couples hosting their nuptials in the fall months. September and October are tied for the most popular month, each accounting for 16% of weddings, followed by June with 13%. Saturday nuptials

are still strong at 70% followed

by Fridays (14%) and Sundays (12%).

Editor’s Note: About The Knot 2016 Real Weddings Survey The 2016 Real Weddings Survey captured responses from nearly 13,000 US couples married between January 1 and December 31, 2016. Respondents were recruited throughout the year from TheKnot.com membership, which represents nearly 80% of to-be-weds nationwide. Newlyweds received survey invitations shortly after their wedding date and were asked a comprehensive series of questions about the event and their planning process. All qualified respondents attested that they were 18 or older and had a wedding in 2016.

Survey respondents represent a variety of ethnicities and educational and income levels, and are geographically dispersed across the country. The survey and data management partner for the study was Decipher Inc. The Knot is a big wedding resource and marketplace that engages, matches and connects couples with products, services and local wedding professionals they need to plan and pull off their wedding.

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PAGE 6 —

Spring Weddings Addison Independent, Thursday, March 30, 2017

Spring

Wedding

Room 9 at the Waybury Inn in East Middlebury would be an exceptionally romantic honeymoon suite even without the added charm of a dresser with a hidden drawer within which couples have been inserting romantic notes for the past 30 years.

The secret drawer

Independent photo/Trent Campbell

photos by Duback Photography and Render Photography

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BY DOUGLAS ANDERSON EAST MIDDLEBURY — Nobody remembers when the desk first came to the Waybury Inn. The East Middlebury, Vermont landmark has been in continuous operation since 1810, so it’s a good bet that the desk, with its fold-out writing surface and dozens of small drawers and crannies, has been there for decades. For many years the desk sat quietly in the inn’s Room 9, the honeymoon suite. No doubt most newlyweds paid little attention to it, their energy focused on other things. But one couple took the time to explore the quirky antique, and their curiosity was rewarded with the discovery of a slender secret drawer, in plain view though cunningly disguised as a bit of fretwork. To commemorate the moment, the bride dashed off a note and inserted it into the secret compartment: “June 27, 1987. On this day Julie M. Hughes married Michael Southwick in Middlebury. Vt. We spent our wedding night here.

We hope you enjoyed your stay here and leave a note, as we have, for others to find in this secret drawer of the grand ol’ desk.”

Thus began the romantic and very quiet tradition of the secret drawer in Room 9. Only those lucky enough to stay in this particular room — and clever enough to discover the secret drawer — have been aware of the custom.

In time, over 200 eloquent and sometimes deeply personal messages would be left in the room. They now reside in a shoebox stashed in a low drawer, waiting to be savored by a new generation of guests. The writing is by turns passionate, philosophical, comic, and profound.

“As recently its eight weeks ago neither of us knew the other existed…. We both have decided we want to spend the rest of our lives together. Some things you know right away, and this is one of them. Maureen, I love you, I always will.”

And this: “In just one evening in this most peaceful place we have dedicated our lives to each oth-

in Room No. 9

er and charted our future together. We promise to return and update you on all our future exploits.”

Only a minority of the notes are from newlyweds, but all of them explore the magic of romance.

“We discovered the secret box and spent 30 minutes smiling and laughing together. We are not newly weds. Our trip has been one of renewed love and friendship. After 16 years, we find we can still find things to talk about besides “the kids.” I love you, Ed. Thanks for a week to remember.”

Many of the letters are surprisingly candid, with references to broken relationships, personal hardship, illness, and death. A husband has surprised his wife with a Vermont vacation because “… in February we found out that our eldest daughter has diabetes. She was almost at coma level. Then just a week ago I found out I’m going to have surgery.”

One particular letter is remarkable for its unblinking clarity: “I remember the night I met him. Before I went out, I told God that I had had enough — no more physical abuse and no more mental abuse. No more. What was the sign that it was right? He asked to kiss me good nite. (No one ever asked, just assumed the role and went for it.) You know what I said? No. He wasn’t offended, and yes, I saw him again. Just remember: Fight for what is yours and ask God to bring you through it. You can’t do alone. We have been sober 12 years and have a beautiful five-year-old and are in this for the long haul.”

One gets the feeling that many of these writers are articulating things they’ve long felt but never expressed. One muses on the therapeutic quality of the letters.

Upon reading these letters, I was surprised how quickly moved I was, and am, by their sin and strength. Perhaps writing here is like talking while lying on a psychiatrist’s couch, free to think, to feel, to remember — trusting the listener as I do now you, the reader.

Another writer picks up the thread:

Spring Weddings Addison Independent, Thursday, March 30, 2017 — PAGE 7

Issue “… It is your quiet voices, your secret voices that have moved me. You prove that we all have much to share with each other. Thanks to this wonderful place and those hearts who have been willing to share space within you.”

The letters also tell of young love: “Not bad accommodations for a couple of college kids! We cannot afford to be staying here, but we are young and in love and funding such a wonderful night is a detail we will work out later. P.S. Mom and Dad, if you ever stay here and read this, Paul slept on the couch.”

And of the tricks of the trade in surviving the longer-lasting variety: “Just celebrated our 25th anniversary. The man spoils me rotten and I know it. Sweet man, but tonight I will be up till the COWS come home. He snores like a 747 coming in for a landing. The trick is to go to bed before him and get a running start.”

The advice in one note is especially poignant and persuasive, given its source: “Four traveling widows, having a lovely time in beautiful Vermont. We travel around for two weeks together each year since losing our beloved husbands. Much happiness to each and every one who stops here. Sometimes life is short with your partner. Live each day with laughter, love, and kindness to each other.”

In the 1980s the Waybury Inn served as the exterior for television’s Bob Newhart Show.

(Passersby might not make the connection today. During taping, the inn was painted white, but now it’s a more historically appropriate shade of green.) That very funny show is long gone. But the comic muse is alive and well in Room 9.

“We picked this place to help celebrate a milestone in our lives … but now he is sick and in the bathroom while I am out here alone reading all these romantic letters of good times and fun in this room. Sorry we missed it!”

In two different entries on a single sheet, an irrepressible young man tells a story with a happy ending:

Couples who stay in Room 9 at the Waybury enjoy reading the notes and adding to the long-standing tradition by leaving one of their own.

Independent photo/Trent Campbell

High Style A CLASSY TABLE RUNNER decorated with green leaves, pink roses, candles and succulents welcomed guests at Willa and Eric Lampman’s Basin Harbor wedding last June.

Photo by Clay Austin Photography

Within an old dresser a wooden detail that you would never suspect pulls out to reveal a narrow chamber into which the notes are inserted.

Independent photo/Trent Campbell

“2-19-95. I just spent the most perfect weekend with the most beautiful woman in the world. All I want is for her to be happy, I know that I am up to the task because she is so easy to be around. I look forward to spending the rest of my life with her because someday I will marry her. You can count on it!”

“10- 15 -95. I told you to count on it! Suzanne and I made our long awaited return to the Waybury Inn — as an engaged couple! We stayed in Room 10 but snuck into the honeymoon suite so we could add to this letter.”

A recurring theme in these letters is how guests often can’t believe their dumb luck; had they missed the flight or skipped the party, they never would have found the love of their lives. But one letter stands out as a reminder that not everyone has been so fortunate. A 45-year-old woman writes: “I’m staying in this room, but I’m not a newlywed as a matter of fact, I’m single and here by myself. My friends laughed at me when I told them I was staying in the honeymoon suite. But I don’t care. This is my third trip to the Waybury Inn, and I love it. This is my time — it ‘s what I do for myself. Maybe someday I’ll bring that special man with me, and together we’ll spend a night in this romantic and cozy room.”

Perhaps the best thing that can be said about the Room 9 writers is that they don’t romanticize romance. If anything, they take great pains to point out just how difficult life with another person can be. Relationships are hard.

People go through bad times. But something pulls them through, and that something is intimacy and understanding. Romance endures.

It also has some nice fringe benefits. From a couple who’ve been coming to the Waybury Inn since 1958: “For those of you who enjoy reading these letters for lascivious reasons, the answer is Yes! It is still great after 38 Years — especially in Room 9.”

Editor’s Note: This piece was written by Douglas Anderson, originally appeared in Yankee Magazine and was provided by the Waybury Inn in East Middlebury.

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PAGE 8 —

Spring Weddings Addison Independent, Thursday, March 30, 2017

Spring

Wedding

Issue

All in a row

Abby and Joe Murphy chose to have a large wedding party with them at the alter on their big day. Bridesmaids were, from left to right, Kandace Mavro, Lila Ortuno, Kalee Murphy, Jen Jackson, Lindsey Fitzgerald and maid-of-honor Grace Lane. Groomsmen, from left to right, were Dave Parise (best man), Justin Charron, Mark Nolet, Derek Skeffington, Rob Pocius and Damon McQuaid.

Photo by Barb Wood, Riverwood Photography

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Spring Weddings Addison Independent, Thursday, March 30, 2017 — PAGE 9

Places to Get Married Top 25 Most Expensive

Based on average cost of a wedding in 2016, couples spend the most on their weddings in the following areas in the U.S. Four of the five most expensive places to get married are in the New York/ Tri-State area.

1. New York – Manhattan: $78,464 2. New York – Long Island: $67,831 3. New Jersey – North/Central: $62,606 4. Illinois – Chicago: $60,035 5. New York – Outer Boroughs: $59,027 6. Massachusetts – Cape Cod: $58,608 7. New York – Westchester/Hudson Valley: $54,428 8. Rhode Island: $52,328 9. Florida – Southern: $48,596 10. Pennsylvania – Philadelphia/Delaware: $48,093 11. New Jersey – South: $46,486 12. California – Santa Barbara/Ventura: $45,957 13. California – Los Angeles: $44,062 14. Massachusetts – Boston: $44,028 15. California – San Francisco/Greater Bay Area: $42,716 16. Louisiana – New Orleans: $42,628 17. Connecticut: $42,127 18. Texas – Houston/East TX: $40,285 19. DC – Washington DC/Northern VA/Suburban MD: $40,176 20. California – San Diego: $37,268 21. Texas –Austin/San Antonio/South TX/Central TX: $36,522 22. Maryland – Baltimore: $35,861 23. Michigan – Detroit: $35,576 24. California – Orange County: $35,303 25. NY – Capital District/Upstate NY: $34,874 —The Knot

Regional differences in weddings

Top 10 Most Affordable Based on average cost of a wedding in 2016, couples spend the least on their weddings in the following areas in the US. 1. Arkansas: $19,522 2. Utah: $20,337 3. Montana: $20,794 4. Texas – West Texas: $21,688 5. Oregon: $21,854 6. Idaho: $22,018 7. Arizona – Tucson: $22,175 8. Iowa: $23,098 9. Nevada: $23,239 10. Oklahoma: $23,302

More U.S. Wedding Stats Average Wedding Cost: $35,329 (excludes honeymoon) (up from $32,641 in 2015)

Most Expensive Place to Get Married: Manhattan, $78,464 average spend Least Expensive Place to Get Married: Arkansas, $19,522 average spend Average Spent on a Wedding Dress: $1,564

Average Marrying Age: Bride, 29 ; Groom, 31 Average Number of Guests: 141

Average Number of Bridesmaids: 5 Average Number of Groomsmen: 5

Most Popular Month to Get Engaged: December (15%) Average Length of Engagement: 15 months

Most Popular Month to Get Married: October (16%) and September (16%) Popular Wedding Colors: Dark blue (29%), gold (28%) and light pink (28%) Percentage of Destination Weddings: 20%

The Knot 2016 Real Weddings Survey can be broken down on a region-byregion basis across more than 80 markets. Regional highlights include: • Cost of Weddings: Manhattan, New York, and Long Island, New York, have the highest average wedding spend ($78,464 and $67,831, respectively), and Arkansas and Utah have the lowest average wedding spend ($19,522 and $20,337 respectively), excluding honeymoon.

• Marriage Age: New York City accounts for the country’s oldest brides, with Manhattan brides being 31.7 years old on average, and brides from Southern Florida being an average of 31.2 years old. Whereas Alabama and Tucson, Arizona, have the youngest brides (26.5 and 26.7 years, respectively), on average. The country’s oldest grooms can be found in Manhattan (34.4 years old) and Southern Florida (33.1 years old), and the youngest grooms are in Alabama and Utah (27.9 and 28.2 years, respectively).

• Engagement Length: Couples from Orange County, California and Lehigh Valley/Poconos, Pennsylvania, have the longest engagements (20.5 and 19.3 months, respectively), while couples in Utah and Mississippi walk down the aisle a bit sooner after getting engaged (8.5 and 11 months, respectively), on average.

• Wedding Size: Nebraska and Iowa couples have the largest number of wedding guests (230 and 210, respectively), and couples who tie the knot in Hawaii and Nevada still have the smallest number of wedding guests (74 and 84, respectively).

• Wedding Style: Hawaii and Montana weddings are more likely to be casual than any other region in the US (44% and 39%, respectively), while Long Island and North/Central New Jersey have the most black tie weddings (40% and 38%, respectively).

• Wedding Dress Spend: As in 2015, brides in Manhattan and Long Island still spend the most on their wedding gowns ($2,564 and $2,473, respectively), while Nevada and Oregon brides spend the least ($1,074 and $1,171, respectively).

• Honeymoon: Couples from Alabama (89%), Mississippi (89%), Toledo, Ohio (87%) and Tennessee (87%) are most likely to book a honeymoon, while couples in Montana (33%), Nevada (60%) and Hawaii (61%) are least likely to book a honeymoon.

• Gift Registry: Couples in Nebraska and Alabama are most likely to register for wedding gifts (98% and 96%, respectively), while couples in Nevada and Hawaii are least likely to register (66% and 70%, respectively).

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Spring Weddings Addison Independent, Thursday, March 30, 2017

Tips for guests looking for lodging (MS) — Couples about to tie the knot often arrange for discounted hotel rooms for their wedding guests. Many hotels offer substantial discounts to wedding parties, but some guests and bridal party members might still want to examine their options before booking rooms. The following tips can help guests find the right room so they can enjoy their loved ones’ wedding weekends to the fullest.

• Don’t overlook the wedding hotel. Many couples put a lot of thought into the hotel where their guests will be staying. Couples may have already done the legwork with regard to finding a hotel that’s closest to the wedding ceremony and receptions sites and still within arm’s-length of other attractions guests can enjoy while in town.

Give ample consideration to the hotel or hotels affiliated with the wedding prior to beginning your search, even if the hotel is a chain you have never used before or have not liked in the past.

• Prioritize proximity. It’s important to consider

factors aside from cost when searching for a place to stay for a loved one’s wedding. The most affordable option is not always the most ideal.

Proximity to the ceremony and reception venues should be a priority, as guests won’t save much money, if any, if their hotel is so far away from the weekend’s activities that they must rent cars or take taxis all weekend.

• Share rooms to reduce costs. If the wedding rates are unaffordable, float the idea of sharing rooms with fellow guests. Splitting the cost of a double room instead of booking a single room by yourself can save substantial amounts of money.

Staying in the hotel with other guests will make you feel like you are not missing out on anything.

• Look for lower rates in the wedding hotel.

Room rates are locked in once couples choose a particular hotel or hotels, but guests might be able to find more affordable rates at the same hotel by waiting to book and perusing discount hotel websites and apps.

How to organize wedding planning

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(MS) — Weddings require a lot of planning.

Couples hosting large weddings or even intimate gatherings can easily be overwhelmed by the amount of planning they must do to make their weddings into events they will remember and cherish forever.

Staying organized when planning a wedding is a tall task. It’s wise to expect the unexpected when organizing a wedding, and the more organized couples can stay, the more fun they can have during the planning process and the better they can handle the unforeseen circumstances that are bound to arise in the months leading up to the wedding.

• Create separate filing systems for each aspect of the wedding. Rather than maintaining one massive file with information about various elements of the wedding, maintain separate files for each aspect of the wedding. For example, when receiving quotes from prospective florists, keep all florist quotes in a single folder that remains separate from information about other parts of the wedding. Separate filing systems make it easier to find quotes and contracts when you need to, saving you the trouble of digging through pages upon pages of quotes, notes and other information you store.

• Maintain a spending spreadsheet. Many couples plan weddings on carefully constructed budgets. But couples can easily exceed those budgets if they are not routinely monitoring and recording their spending or the spending they are

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committing to upon signing contracts with vendors. Create a spending spreadsheet that allows you to track how much you have already spent, how much you are committed to spending and when wedding bills are due. Update the spreadsheet whenever you write a check or sign a new contract, and periodically examine the sheet so you can make sure you are still on track to remain at or under budget.

• Hire a planner. If wedding planning is proving especially overwhelming or if you simply don’t have time to do all the legwork necessary to plan on your own, hire a wedding planner.

Wedding planners are invaluable resources who can help couples quickly connect with vendors who can meet their needs while staying within their budgets. Planners also can advise couples on ways to save money and which areas of the wedding should not be cheaply made.

Couples planning destination weddings should inquire about resort-affiliated wedding planners before choosing a venue to host their ceremonies.

• Start early. The average length of engagement for couples who wed in 2016 was 15 months. That means today’s average couples have more than a year to plan. By starting their wedding planning early, couples can avoid having to plan everything at the last minute, which can be hecticand unorganized. In addition, starting early affords couples more time to find great deals and stay within their budgets.

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How to build your wedding budget (MS) — Couples engaged to be married have a lot on their plates as they begin planning their weddings. Whereas tradition once demanded parents of the bride pay for a couple’s wedding, nowadays more and more engaged couples are completely or partially financing their own nuptials. That means prospective brides and grooms must develop wedding budgets that won’t ensure their first act as Mr. and Mrs. is paying down debt.

Couples who plan to pay for all or most of their weddings on their own can heed the following tips to build wedding budgets that won’t break the bank but will still ensure a day to remember forever.

EXAMINE YOUR COLLECTIVE FINANCES Few couples know the details of each other’s finances before getting engaged. While some may still hesitate to share their personal financial information upon getting engaged, an open and honest discussion and examination of each person’s finances is the only way to develop a realistic wedding budget that both partners can live with. Once couples know what they can contribute, they can then consult their parents to determine if their mothers and fathers intend to contribute.p DEVELOP A PRELIMINARY GUEST LIST A preliminary guest list can give couples an idea of how large and expensive their weddings will be. According to the Real Weddings Study, the average cost per wedding guest in 2016 was $245. While that cost can vary greatly depending on geography and other factors, couples should keep that figure in mind when drafting their guest

lists. If need be, keep costs down by trimming the guest list so it includes only close family members and friends.

DON’T COUNT ON GIFTS Many couples justify runaway wedding budgets by telling themselves that they will ultimately get the money back via wedding gifts. While many guests will give financial gifts, counting on such windfalls is a recipe for accruing debt. Do not build potential wedding gifts into your wedding budget. If you do so and your expectations fall short, you could be facing considerable debt upon returning home from your honeymoon.

GATHER QUOTES BEFORE CHOOSING WHERE TO TIE THE KNOT Where couples get married will have a great impact on how much money they will spend on their weddings. For example, the Real Weddings Study found that, in 2016, the average wedding in Manhattan cost couples slightly less than $80,000, while the average wedding in Arkansas cost less than $20,000. Venues within the same city can vary greatly with regard to pricing and offerings as well, so couples should give themselves ample time to gather quotes and find an affordable venue they like.

BUILD EXTRA COSTS INTO YOUR BUDGET When determining a budget you can live with, remember to include a little extra for unforeseen costs. Weddings are large undertakings, and it’s reasonable to expect some unforeseen costs to arise. Building such costs into your initial budget will make these unforeseen circumstances that much easier to handle.

Budgets can help couples stay on track and avoid debt as they plan their weddings.

Spring Weddings Addison Independent, Thursday, March 30, 2017 — PAGE 11

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Spring Weddings Addison Independent, Thursday, March 30, 2017