cop at the top

Here in low-altitude East Dallas, he’s known as the commander of the Dallas Police Central Patrol Division, but Deputy Chief Vincent Golbeck has some high aspirations that have little to do with fighting crime. He became “sortof obsessed” with mountain climbing in the early ’90s, he says, after reading an article about Highpointers Club, an organization whose members aspire to reach the highest elevation in all 50 states. The officer concedes it’s absurd that a guy who grew up mostly in East Texas loved the mountains so much. His pancake-flat roots didn’t stop him from joining the club and embarking on the lofty goal — he has now reached every state’s high point save Hawaii and Alaska, and he has climbed Mt. Rainer in Washington twice, most recently in July. “Some of the heights aren’t worth climbing, and you merely drive to them,” he says. “But others require much more energy and fitness.” It’s not easy to train for this sort of thing when you live in East Dallas, says Golbeck, who trains mostly on stair machines and with other exercises, such as lunges, that strengthen climbing muscles. “I do envy those who live in the mountains,” Golbeck says. “I never feel prepared enough. One of the toughest climbs, to Gannett Peak in Wyoming, required a 24-mile trek before you even started the summit attempt. It really challenged me.” Hawaii’s 13,796foot Mauna Kea is on his schedule, but Alaska’s Mt. McKinley might not be in the cards. “It is dangerous, and I’m 51 years old. Older guys have done it, but I don’t know if my wife would go for the idea.” Though the 29-year veteran of the Dallas Police Department has been hit by falling rocks (one, a rather large boulder) and seen a couple close calls, he still hopes to go to Everest and “just” climb to the first base camp, at a mere 17,000 feet.

? Cars are always SPEEDING down my street. How can I get ROAD HUMPS installed to make them slow down?

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ENVISION YOUR FINISH-LINE MOMENT IN HIGH DEFINITION!

The City of Dallas has a program specifically designed to allow residents to petition for road humps (also known as road bumps) on a street, but it’s not a simple process, and depending on the average speed of cars on your street, it may cost you. If money is not a stop sign for you on the road to safer streets, here’s how it works:

1. Several requirements must be met for your street to be deemed eligible for the program, so first you need to see if yours qualifies. The four main criteria are that your street must:

Be at least 1,000 feet long and provide access to “adjoining lowdensity residential properties” (meaning single-family homes, duplexes, triplexes and fourplexes — not apartment complexes) Have only one traffic lane in each direction

Not be listed as an emergency response route by Dallas FireRescue or less

To find out if your street qualifies, contact the City of Dallas Public Works and Transportation Department at

214.670.4020. They will instigate a review of the location by Dallas FireRescue to confirm eligibility.

2. If your street qualifies for the program, you must petition for signatures from two-thirds of the households on the proposed stretch of road in order to install road humps. Once complete, the petition can be sent to: Road Hump Coordinator, Department of Public Works and Transportation, City Hall, Room L1/BN, Dallas, TX 75201.

3. Approximately three weeks after the petition is received, the city will perform a traffic study to determine the average speed of vehicles on the street. This will determine how much of the total cost the residents must pay.

4. Based on the findings, residents will have to decide whether they are willing to pay for their share of the road humps, each of which measure 12 feet long and 3 inches high, and cost $1,100. If the city finds that traffic violators are traveling at an average speed of 35 mph, residents are responsible for 100 percent of the cost. An average speed of 36 mph, however, reduces residents’ share to 80 percent; 37 mph reduces it to 60 percent; 38 to 40 percent; and if violators are driving at average speeds of 39+ mph, the city will foot the entire bill.

For more information, contact the Public Works and Transportation Department at 214.670.4020.

—ELIZABETH ELLIOTT GOT A MAZE YOU CAN’T FIND YOUR WAY THROUGH? Email howitworks@advocatemag.com with your question.

Spare Me

Occasionally, AMY MARKS comes home to find a bowling ball at her doorstep. “There’s no note with it or anything,” she says. “Somebody just left it and I have no idea who it was.” People bring them to her because she’s the bowling ball lady of Dallas. Instead of planting colorful blooms (she says she’s “lousy at flowers”), Marks paints bowling balls and arranges them in the garden of her Capri Drive home. “I’m up to 97 now,” she says. Marks is an artist who recently won accolades at the State Fair of Texas for her handmade dolls. But for fun, she searches thrift stores, garage sales and flea markets for old bowling balls. They’re harder to find than they used to be, she says. And many thrift stores don’t sell them for fear of some kid lobbing one across the store. Marks remembers that she and her nephew once found seven balls in one redletter day. The bowling ball garden of Capri Drive will continue to grow, she says. “Of course, now I want 100.” —RACHEL

STONE