Shattered Dreams By Aizy Wayne

Shattered Dreams THE LIFE OF A RAPPER

By Andrew Stanley

This is a book about struggling music artist “AIZY WAYNE” wrote by him to show the world the true story behind the world’s most hated & misunderstood music artist.

He goes behind the scenes on growing up, his health problems, his bone thug days, family loss and his kids. This book highlights the many struggles facing many of today’s underground music artists and goes into detail of who AIZY is as a person and as a music artist.

2014 Aizy Wayne INC. WWW.AIZYWAYNE.COM All rights reserved. Any copying is restricted by federal law. Made in the USA

TABLE OF CONTENTS INTRUDUCTION PAGE 3 CHAPTER 1 MY FIRST 5 YEARS PAGE 4 CHAPTER 2 START TO A HARD LIFE PAGE 9 CHAPTER 3 BETRAYAL PAGE 15 CHAPTER 4 A BRAND NEW START PAGE 22 CHAPTER 5 LATER TEEN YEARS PAGE 28 CHAPTER 6 TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS PAGE 33 CHAPTER 7 START OF A MUSIC DREAM PAGE 41 CHAPTER 8 MY FIRST GLIMPSE OF FAME PAGE 46 CHAPTER 9 DEATHS FACE PAGE 52 CHAPTER 10 LIFE AFTER DEATH PAGE 56 CHAPTER 11 THE GOLDEN YEARS PAGE 62 CHAPTER 12 MY BELOVED GRANDMOTHER PASSES PAGE 66 CHAPTER 13 BACK IN TENNESSEE PAGE 70 CHAPTER 14 THE FUTURE AND BEYOND PAGE 74 CHAPTER 15 IN CLOSING PAGE 77 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS PAGE 81

ALL FACTS ARE TRUE AND TOLD BY MY BEST RECONLECTIONS IF SOME DATES ARE IN ERROR IT WAS BY PURE MISTAKE.

INTRODUCTION It seems just like yesterday I was a little kid with big dreams. Ever since I can remember I’ve had this fear of death, which in turn made me want to leave my footprint in this world.

I'm writing this book to give insight into my life it’s about the good and bad that this music life has brought me, from the stresses to the excitements to my successes.

This book is also about my personal life, my takes on certain people, and it’s also about the future as well. So to truly understand me, my motives and why I act like I do, this book is a must read. It is based on my life but in its basic form it really lets you into the life’s of other musicians to.

My story is unique because of my strong desire to succeed and my will to survive. I hope you enjoy this book as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Andrew Stanley Aka Aizy Wayne

WWW.AIZYWAYNE.COM

CHAPTER 1 MY FIRST FIVE YEARS I was born on September, 26th 1976, in Livonia, Michigan. I was a premature baby who spent his first months of life in an incubator. I was born to my mother and father Ronald Krause who both where about 18 years of age. Ronald was into the drug scene and from what I’ve been told he was a bad influence for me and my mother. Not soon after, my mother in one way or another left Ronald, to focus on taking care of me.

Soon after my mother met my step-father and they began dating and when I was around 1 year old , they were married and I was adopted by my step dad. This may not seem like a big moment now but as you read on, you will see the great impact this has had on my life as a person and as a musician.

On October 21st 1977, I had a brother born.

He was born healthy and all went well for the first few years of life.

My step-father was an ex navy man, who landed a fairly good job working for General Motors in Flint, Michigan in the early 80’s.

I have good memories of Me, my mom, and my brother going and visiting him on his lunch

breaks, and the reason I guess I remember those days so well is this plant he worked at had a big fenced in park with lots of deer and we would feed the deer, we really enjoyed going there on his lunch.

Sometime when we were around 2 or 3 years old my parents bought their first house on Birch Drive in Hartland, Michigan. Back in those days we did a lot of things as a family. We would go to the local nursery and pick cherries off the trees, or go pick our own corn or apples. We also spent a lot of time at my step dads parents house on Spaulding Road in Argentine, Michigan. Me and brother liked it there since he had airplanes and lots of land. I remember my grandmother had maple trees and actually made her own maple syrup. My grandfather also worked and retired from General Motors.

We also spent a lot of time at my other grandparent’s house on Mabley Hill Road in Fenton, Michigan. This was my favorite spot in the world and quite honestly still is to this very day. I remember my uncle Steve was a hockey player going to college and I was always amazed at his Coke bottle collections.

I don’t remember any bad times except one in my first 4 or 5 years of life. I do remember

seeing my step-dad pull my mother out the house, by her hair, dragging her down some stairs and throwing her outside. At the time I didn’t see the wrong in that, and still today this day I remember that as the first form of violence I’d ever seen. No cops were called and through the years that moment has never been discussed before.

My first memory would have to be pushing a lawn mower around the age of four, and it’s a faint memory to say the least. I clearly remember my first day of school, but my only memory of that is waving to my mother as I got on the bus, on that dirt road.

Also I remember our first vacation to Myrtle Beach, I remember the car broke down while we were there and that’s about it. In those first 5 years of life everything was so great, no worries no cares, we were poor believe that, but me nor my brother even knew. I remember one Christmas some people showed up at the door with bags of toys for me and my brother, I remember my parents being so ashamed, they kept saying we are not poor, and they were to me what seemed to anger towards who ever told them they needed help like that, me and my brother didn’t care we had tons of toys for

Christmas, I still remember that as one of the best Christmas’s we ever had. Life was grand, my step-dad who at this time I thought was my real father (we’ll get to that later) would play fight with us and wrestle it was great. I remember one autumn day me and my brother were playing outside and my brother got into an ant hill, I still can see him now running though the yard stripping his clothes off he got ate up by hundreds of these little red ants on him just biting away.

I also remember one day my brother got a hold of some orange or yellow spray paint and spray painted the whole left side of my step-dads brand new garage. He was so mad, that’s the first time I saw him really lose his temper, I was probably around 4 or 5 when that happened.

Ill end this chapter by talking about my first year in school. By the time I started school, because of how my birthday fell I was almost 6 years old. I believe this is the year where some of my problems I still have to this day started. I don’t remember my kindergarten teachers name was but I remember her being very old and cranky. School was good and I got along with everyone but for some reason I still don’t know to this today why I was held back by the school

and my parents. So there I was 6 yrs old starting kindergarten again which by the end of the first month of that school year I was 7 years old in kindergarten, and this is where my life problems started.

CHAPTER 2 START TO HARD A LIFE My life up to this point had been for the most part uneventful, but that was all about to change.

We ended the last chapter with me repeating kindergarten.

I finally passed kindergarten the second time and that would be the last time I was ever held back in school. We continued to live in Hartland, Michigan, going to Hartland Schools until one fateful day when my brother got hit over the head with a book by his teacher. My brother is dyslexic and he has always had a hard time reading, long story short she got frustrated with him and hit him with a book. My parents got in to it with the school board but in the end she got a write up and was allowed to keep her job.

My account may be wrong here but I believe this is why my parents sold their house and moved us to Parshallville, Michigan. They rented a farm house there with many corn fields that was called Hal’s U-pick. At this time school was still good I had some friends all was dandy. We stayed there a few years. I remember the owner guy’s name was Hal. Hal was always nice to us,

he gave us candy, let us sit in his old cars he had stored in his barn and let us play with his animals. But in the end there was good concern for his kindness. It was found out after a few years living there that old Hal was a little boy lover, so before he did anything to me or my brother my parents started looking for a new home to buy. I have some good memories from that house. I remember it was 2 stories and me and my brother would fill the stairwell with all our toys and fill it up, I remember my uncle Todd would come by often, he was always a great sight to see around the house. He had motorcycles and was always fixing stuff, just what little boys like right?

I remember at this time my parents had this little ford fiesta with a big iron bumper on the back. And right around this time I remember being at my grandparents house in Fenton, Michigan, and their house was on this big hill, and the car was parked on this big hill, we had this little dog named Webster, I still miss that dog, but anyways me and this dog were in this car, it was a stick shift and somehow I knocked it out of gear and it started rolling down the hill, I tried to stop it but eventually just got out and let it roll. As it rolled down the hill this little dog

had his head out the window enjoying the ride until he realized this isn’t good and he jumped out right before it hit the tree. Needless to say my dad was mad but just glad I was ok. Since the car had that iron bumper the car to was all good.

So around this time a house went up for sale on Mabley Hill Rd. My parents tried to buy it and they lucked out and got it. Needless to say the house was in total need of repair. I remember like tons of garbage in the back yard where the previous owners just let it pile up. I was so excited to move there because my grandparents lived less than a mile down the road. This too would become a burden down the road. We quickly made friends across the street and down the road. Across the street we had the Couture’s who I remember as very good Christian people.

Next door we had the coopers who ran a fiberglass business right next to my dad’s property line so they were always fighting back and forth over the fumes. Then down the road we had the Humphries and the Vincent’s. The Vincent’s ran a dairy farm so it was fun sometimes to go down there and see what they did. Tom Humphries I would say was my favorite friend. He was an only child so dude had

like everything the brand new Packard Bell computers the Nintendo’s and the go carts and horses.

This was when the first of many arguments me and my brother would get in to. When it came time to spend the nights at dudes house, he could only have one of us stay, and it always seemed to be him, this is when I first started feeling like a loner.

Things were never the same after that, my brother was what I would call a sellout type person, he the type of person ever since a kid, would say and do whatever he could to look like he doing right but he be doing more bad then I ever would. I always felt like he would tell Tom Humphries lies saying I said them so he could stay the night over there. I remember my brother would say he had no money when I had some and since I had a generous heart I would give him some money to get that candy bar only to find out he had money the whole time. This caused a lot of rift between me and my brother. I was always getting in trouble for things I didn’t do that he did do. I became known as the liar, which led to more confusion on my end. Then at this time we started going to Fenton schools which did me no good whatsoever. I remember

not long ago bring this up with my mother and she straight said I was making this up I said I had my head smashed into poles and she was like no you didn’t. But I clearly remember in 5th grade on the play ground and other kids knocking me out by smashing my head into poles and I remember her fighting the school over it because the teacher Mr. Brown was standing right there when it happened. And there were countless butt kicking’s that I never told them about. It was never one on one fighting it was 5 on 1 or 3 on 1.

Still to this day my parents say this is just another lie from me, but believe me it was the truth.

I remember on the school bus I had my dome rattled by a dude named Andy Vasco, he was one of many bullies who I had fought thoughout out my life. But it seemed like I was always the one catching the blame. By 5th grade I thought the world was out to get me between my brother and school shit was bad. Around this time I found music, and no joke the music I was bumping was the Beach Boys and Michael Jackson. I would get their tapes and listen to music for hours. I remember once around this time my brother and I actually videotaped us singing I believe a Beach Boys song. It was this moment in time I first felt like music was my

thing. Just being in front of the camera gave me a feeling I never had before. Also every Saturday we would go down to my grandparent’s house on Mabley Hill Rd. and listen to my grandmothers 45’s of Motown. I fell in love with it, music was my release. I also remember at my grandparents, they many things that me and my brother loved.

My grandfather had tractors, old trucks and cars, old riding lawnmowers, and he would always let us work on them. They also had a big pond with lots of bluegill fish and frogs. They also had a little bridge that went from their property to the mansion next door. We used to fish all the time.

Then on this one fateful day my world came crashing down.

CHAPTER 3 BETRAYAL It was a nice sunny Saturday; we had a big day planned. We were going to start it off by getting lunch on the way to Pontiac Superdome to see Big Foot At the monster truck show.

We stopped to eat at a little side of the road restaurant. I remember we ordered our food and as we were sitting there my parents with my brother present said there’s something we need to tell you. There demeanor never suggested what was about to be said. They acted like what they were about to say was no big deal, but it was,for real, it was what I call a game changer.

They said Andy your father isn’t who you think he is. The man you know as your father is really not your father he adopted you when you were a baby. Your real fathers name is Ronald Krause. He was a bad person and he chooses not to be around. This conversation ended as quickly as it started. At first I didn’t really comprehend it, we went to the monster truck rally and had fun. Sometime in those next few weeks everything changed, every time we would get in trouble I started seeing favoritism, I started feeling even more alone. It was around this time

my grandmother Barb Wielichowski started seeing the same thing. She started seeing little things my brother would do at her house and see me getting in trouble over it so her and my parents started arguing a lot. Then on my step father’s side of the family things even looked worse. Around this time my step-dads parents moved to Tennessee, close to Knoxville. I started seeing they didn’t see me the same as my brother. During summer breaks from school my brother would get to go down there and spend many weeks on vacation while I wasn’t invited, they would say because I was unruly but now I truly believe it to be I wasn’t their grandchild.

So at this point in life I really would throw temper tantrums as some would call it and that made my parents seek counseling for me.

From the time of 5th grade on to 9th grade I was in constant counseling. There was a time around 5 or 6th grade I was actually kept 3 days to evaluate me when I put a steak knife to my stomach. Still to this day I can’t see that the problem was ever me, put yourself in my shoes.

Those next few years really shaped my whole life. I remember one summer my brother got to go stay in Florida with my step dads parents who

retired and moved there. I was not allowed to go cause they said I was to unruly. So out of anger and frustration my grandma Barb and grandpa Steve planned something big for me. They conned my parents into letting me stay 3 days with them. Told them they were going to take me to a carnival and spend the rest the time at the house. (My parents still to this day say they knew all about this which I know to be a flat out lie.) But in reality they planned something way bigger. They loaded me and them in the car and we took off on a trip to Makinaw Island and Beaver Island. It is one of the best memories of my life. I remember first riding the hovercraft boat to the island. Then we toured the Grand Hotel. Then we rented bikes and boy did my grandparents get a scare. I told them I was going to ride the bike around the island they misunderstood me ,so for 2 hrs I was gone riding around the island they thought I got kidnapped, they were freaking out they done lost their grandchild on a trip that they weren’t supposed to be on it was heavy. When I got back I never felt so loved in my life ,so after all that the next day we went to beaver island again on a big boat and again we toured the island then came back to Fenton. Soon after we got back ,me as any kid

couldn’t help telling my parents what we did and things hit the fan royally. My parents cut my grandparents off, we weren’t allowed to see or visit my grandparents and that went on for like 6 or 7 months.

All of this because they wanted to see me have a great summer break, like my parents were allowing my brother to do. So the arguments at home got worse and worse. Everything was so tense at home I am thinking nobody loves me, that I’m a burden, and none of the kids really wanted to play with me, I started thinking about death a lot more. I’ve always feared death and my little friend down the road named Joey with whom I only played with a few times ended up dying from a brain infection, so that didn’t help any neither. I remember one time when I got the chicken pox, I got them so bad I had hallucinations, I didn’t know who my mom or dad were or anything, I recovered but it was just another reminder that I could die at anytime. So by the time I got to middle school I was one confused little kid. It seemed as the years went on I was picked on more and more. I couldn’t fight back cause mom and dad’s rule were you get suspended from school you spend all that time in your bed room, so I couldn’t fight back, which in

turn made the kids pick on me more. Around this time my uncle started building a house right down the road. I remember one day while my dad and all them were working on the house, I was sitting on this dirt hill and my heart started racing. It Scared the life out of me but it stopped racing as quick as it begun. This was another life defining moment. (More on this later) My step dad has never really liked my mom’s side of the family , but I know I will hear this after this book comes out, and I know they will claim everybody liked everybody, but unknown to them my family has always kind of had a negative reaction about my step-dad. So after him moving to this house he was always stressed for the most part to the best of recollection. My parents arguing became more intense as with me and my parents arguing more to. I became more into music always listening when I had a chance.

I remember one Christmas we went to Florida and I got a tape walkman that changed me forever. Now I could listen to music where ever I wanted. I would never be the same.

After that I would find myself in the garage on a board in the rafters listening to music.

Little did I know this was shaping my mind for a great talent. I also remember around this time my step

dad bought me and brother both dog I remember my dogs name was Wilbur. These dogs ended up being more trouble for my dad then he ever knew. Oneday my dog got hit by a car and had to have surgery to fix his leg that had been shattered. And not long after the dog got well he got hit again and died. This was the first time i felt a great loss. Then not long after that my stepdad bought us a dirt bike and a four wheeler.

And those would become me and my brother favorite things to do. We loved them.

Around this time I found a good true friend I didn’t have to share with my brother. His name was Ryan Thomas. He was a rich kid who was spoiled since his parents had lost one child. I would spend that night at house a lot. We would ride dirt bikes, try to hunt, play in the woods and watch their satellite TV which at that time was a rare thing. It was great for the first time in years life was looking good. Still at school I had my problems and my new friend would distant himself from me but I kind of understood why he had to do it. Then all of sudden things changed.

As I failed to mention before around the time we were living in Parshallville my dad was laid off from General Motors and he had up work at the dairy my grandfather worked at. He worked

there for a few years after we moved to the Mabley Hill address and then got called back to GM. So after a year or so working for Gm, they started asking people to be interested in transferring to Tennessee to part of the new Saturn car brand my dad applied and got accepted. Gm flew us down to Tennessee to check out stuff so as a family we flew in and the excitement started building. Even though it was a wise move job wise, family wise it was a disaster.

CHAPTER 4 A BRAND NEW START Well the year is now 1991 the month is October, we arrive in Unionville, Tennessee to start our new life. My mother is missing at this time since she is still in Michigan with a broken ankle. She took a fall moving stuff out the old house into the U-haul truck. She had to have surgery done and had 2 steel pins put into her ankle. One of the first things I seen on our arrival I saw a subdivision sign spray painted Yankees go home. At the time it made no sense to me. I didn’t know what racism and hate really was on this level. From the very start my dad had the same hate against them he viewed southerners and ignorant stupid people and he still does to this day. At the time Saturn had a love/hate following. You either hated them or you loved them the locals saw Saturn as no good since they brought most of their workers from other states instead of using the local job pool. So my father had this better then you attitude to these locals.

I always remember when we would get in arguments outside my dad with throw the biggest uproar, scared the neighbors actually gave a damn but they didn’t. People were nice at first

they accepted us the local people made us feel wanted but at school it was way different. I was seen as an outsider Yankee. People avoided me for the most part; you know the last kid picked type shit. Girls avoided me in fears of ruining their reputation. If anything people showed me pity. So my problems followed me. When someone would start trouble with me I would stand up for myself I would yell I would cuss I would do whatever I had to do. My grades started suffering and around this time i took up a group of friends who weren’t the best crowd.

The main guys were the Wessners, and the Cooks .We started smoking cigarettes, stealing them from the local store, fishing and riding bikes doing what 14 and 15 yr old kids do.

Eventually I became somewhat excepted but at home the problems continued. The arguments grew more intense, we had problems cause of the smoking and our choice of friends. And by this time my brothers learning problems got worse which in turn garnered him more attention with me being pushed to the back even more. So I acted out more, and then my punishment would be grounded to the house. So I would see my brother going out with friends having a great time while I mowed lawn did chores or did

nothing. I spent a lot of time in my room staying away from the family. I remember I saved my money up for some time and bought my first cd player and one day me and my parents got in to it and I punched the solid oak door in the living room and it cracked along the grain of the wood which in turn got my dad so mad he went to my room grabbed my radio and throw it out the front door shattering it on the ground into many pieces I was devastated. Then one day not long after that my parent admitted me to The Vanderbilt Psychiatric center. I stayed there for what I remember something like 3 weeks maybe 4 weeks. I really enjoyed it there to be straight.

There wasn’t arguing, nobody judging me, I was accepted, and the staff kind of suggested behind closed doors that the problem really wasn’t me but my family. For the first time in my life besides my grandparents did anybody see it my way.

But this wasn’t a fix to me and my parent’s relationship. In fact it made it worse. They still to this day think I’m the problem. My brother kept taking his trips to Florida during the summers while I got left behind to mow the grass and do other chores; it seemed I was being punished for living. These are some of the

darkest days of my life. Around this time I started reading a lot of books a lot about Thomas Edison and Henry Ford. After reading all these books I wanted to be an inventor in a sense. I wanted to be remembered long after I die, and I still feel that way today. This only made my dream bigger still at this time I hadn’t put this dream and music together. At this time music recording was still out the poor kids budget or even known about to me for that matter, even though I do credit myself to some of the first computer made tracks to ever come out of this local area. As I approached high school people around me were changing but not really me, as the other kids grew I did to but I never gained much weight I just grew and got skinnier.

This got me picked on more. and it sure didn’t help that I couldn’t grow facial hair. In my freshman year I moved to live with my grandparents. Things with my parents and school hit a boiling point that year. So I moved to Michigan and started going to Fenton schools.

Unfortunately for me I wasn’t forgotten. Those same kids who picked on me previously were now big high school kids picking on me now.

Things got worse I started smoking cigarettes more, an getting into fights at school. My

grandparents all my life have been my life blood they were the only people there for me, and they did their best to help me. I started school there with Nike pumps and if it wouldn’t have been for the same bullies who picked on me years before I would have been a really liked person. I started stealing cigarettes from my grandparents that I still regret to this day, and lying to them about it, how could I lie to the very people who were there to help. I hope they forgive me. But anyways I remember my grandfather would always be there there to pick me up after school.

He put this drive in me to get in drivers ed which I did, these days even though I got picked on a lot where some of the best days of my life. I eventually had to go back and live with mom and dad so off to Tennessee I went again So here I was back in Tennessee, same people , same attitudes, and all the same drama. So I finished well almost finished school in Tennessee. My sophomore year was pretty uneventful. At that time my parents joined a bowling league so we would spend Wednesday nights at the bowling alley kicking it then me and my brother would get dropped off on Friday nights and we meet all our friends there. They also had a skating rink we visited a lot to. I

enjoyed both since they had lots of music playing. During the summers we would ride bikes, go fishing on the Duck River, and cave exploring. Those times were pretty good. Our parents allowed us a little more freedom so it was good. During this time I had a few of my heart episodes again of the really fast beating heart but rarely did I have to visit the hospital they would normally stop on their own. The arguments between me and my parents weren’t as bad at first but soon after I turned 16 they had something new to hang over my head.

I now had a driver’s license which in turn allowed me more freedom and at times more trouble.

CHAPTER 5 LATER TEEN YEARS Well I’m 16 now. Every time I turn my back im hearing my parents say if you argue we will take your license. Your grades get bad you lose your license, you do this or that and so forth you get the picture. Life was hell, I got my first job at Taco Bell. I didn’t really enjoy it and I believe I lasted maybe 2 or 3 months. I got criticized by my parents for quitting. See I’ve never been a very good worker and back then I wasn’t either at least when I was going to school then leaving school to work I just didn’t have the energy.

After Taco Bell, I worked at Pizza Inn, I worked there for almost a year on and off. I liked this job because they made you feel wanted, and with the free food and tips from deliveries you couldn’t beat it. I would always blow my money on stuff for my car, systems to play music on, and other odds and ends and my parents would hate on that always saying look at your brother he works and look what he has. You just blow your money, they may have meant well but they were just causing more mental harm. At this point in life I really got tired of being compared to my brother.

You see all I’ve ever wanted is for my parents to

accept me and still to this day they don’t. so anyways through these years I got more and more into music buying lots of cd’s to compliment my collection. I remember the first cd’s I ever bought where Gun’s n Roses, Metallica, Warrant, Motley Crue and Def Leopard.

I attended a concert with Def Leopard and Ugly Kidd Joe and Bad Company. This is when I saw my dream and music come together as one.

When I saw this I knew this is what I want to do, everybody will like me, I’ll be wanted but most of all I will be remembered. So the path was made even though I still didn’t mess with music for a couple years or so.

So anyways I started attending this local spot in Shelbyville Tennessee called The Sub Stop.

Every Friday night they would have live bands playing, I could always be found there. I dreamed of making music but I lacked the ability to play instruments and also I lacked the funds to get them. But by going there I could dream and have hope. Most of the bands sucked occasionally they would have a good band but very rarely. I could feel the music in my blood it was crazy a feeling I still get today.

Now it’s my junior year in high school being really smart but lazy I choose the easy route to get attention from my parents and I played dumb and got into special ed like my brother. I saw him getting attention from my parents cause his learning problems so I said why not me. I got into vocation school in a program called general building trades and boy was that a bad choice.

All the picking on came back. I had people taking my money, continually hitting me and smacking me and one time on the vocation bus on the way there I was held down and 5 people attempted to put a broom handle up my rear. I fought back and kept it from happing another 2 people and it would have not been good and this happened 2 or 3 times not once. So anyways life was hard, I had family who didn’t understand me or my problems, I was 600 miles from the only people who really gave a damn, I was like stuck in this life called hell. When I was 17 I was kicked out the house the first time. I wasn’t allowed to take my car since my parents owned it. So I was on my own getting drunk on the streets of Shelbyville living here and there and running with the wrong crowd but by the time school started up my senior year I was back home. Life at home was still the same, but I had

a new sense of excitement senior year, you know the times of homecoming dances, graduation and your path to life. I started thinking for the first time in my life about collage. Those thoughts were short lived. The first problem was I took all the easy classes so I didn’t have the right credits to even get in, the second problem was my parents made to much money for me to qualify for most assistance. So the reality started to set in, which in turn put me back on this I don’t give a damn road. Music again seemed to be a way out, but I still hadn’t found away to do it. I continued on in my senior year of high school got my senior ring got me a date for homecoming who ended up having sex with someone else that night, which didn’t help my mind set at all. Then comes April when I’m told I can’t graduate at all cause I will be 1 credit short, so again another let down, something I was hoping for wasn’t going to happen so that same day me and the PE teacher got in to it and I quit school. I walked home that day crying my eyes out. When I got home sure enough I was to blame it was all my fault which I guess it was but instead of being supportive my parents were downright hateful calling me an idiot a dumbass to name a few, life was bad and it wasn’t getting

no better. Throughout high school I had girlfriends I had a little sex here and there but no major relationship. My brother and his friends would pick on me to. How can a brother allow others to pick on their brother? Isn’t family supposed to stick up for you? Around this time I started thinking about having a girlfriend and doing the family thing. But it would be years later before that ever happened.

Shortly after I quit high school at 18 I found a job selling Kirby vacuums and here is where the next part of my story starts that will eventually lead us up to where I am today.

CHAPTER 6 TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS Well around 1995 I started working for Kirby.

The first few months I didn’t do so well but I stuck with it working 10-12 hr days. Here little to my knowledge I was honing my sales skills that would become of great use later on. The owner ended up becoming the father I never had type dude. On the weekends we would all load up on the boat and spend the days on the water.

We would take jeeps and climb sides of hills; we would have parties getting drunk and wasted.

This is where I first smoked pot. Up to this point in life I had barely drank a beer. But the night I first smoked pot we had been in Grundy county Tennessee selling vacuums in the hills and we ended up getting pot as a trade in and all the guys in the van were like we got to smoke it so they passed it as it came to me I said no thanks so they past it again and by that time with 3 joints burning in a van I had a little contact buzz so I took a hit an in that instant my world changed. I got baked I mean fried I mean full blown somehow I managed to drive the 20 miles home and when I woke the next morning it was if nothing happened, no hang over no nothing.

The best thing though was when I was high the life stresses didn’t matter much, I became focused and started staying high selling Kirby’s I would go on in the next year being top salesman and coming 1 sale short of having a free vacation to the Bahamas. But considering my bosses best friend to was one sale short of having the trip they took the sale I needed to go and gave it to dude, again I got screwed. After I lost that contest and after several broken promises I left the company only to come back and work a few other times. During this time I met a girl with whom I dated on and off eventually we split and a dude who worked under me at Kirby started dating her. This same guy I was forced to fire from the Kirby business and me and him were on fighting terms. This guy spent something like 6 or 7 years n prison for attempted murder.

Needless to say just firing dude was trouble enough for me but it got worse. I quit Kirby for a bit and stayed out of town where this dude stayed. But 9 months later I found out she had my baby I was set up by this one girl named Mellissa who told me I had a son born and where I could see him but unknown to me she was telling this girls husband now who was the same dude I fired 9 months earlier that I would

be there and he could now have his revenge on me. Some how I made to this apartment and I show up an after I was there for a little under ten minutes I got jumped by her husband and 7 of his friends they beat the life out of me I almost died that night ,woke up with hand print bruises on my neck it was crazy still to this day I don’t even know how I got there or I how I was going to get home I remember somehow I managed to get through the only exit and run for my life. I had been so close to death I latterly had shit my pants, so I ran and ran until I got to this neighborhood, and I started knocking on doors looking for any type of help I could get. And I remember the second door I knocked on I was met with a double 12 gauge to my head. I explained what was going on to the people and just then here come dude in a pick truck with the whole bed filled with people, out hunting me down. The guy with the double barrel shotgun told me to hide behind his bushes so I did.

Movements later the police arrived and they took me to the local police department.

I do know I called my brother from the police station one of the only times he actually meant well. I saw my son once after that and again which I will discuss later on.

Soon after I quit Kirby I moved to Michigan and again started working for Kirby up there. I didn’t stay long the guy that owned that business invited me to move to Arizona so I did. It was one of the longest trips of my life I drove dudes 71 olds convertible mint condition there and let me tell you they aren’t known for their great ride. But anyway we get to Arizona and shortly after we get there the police come and impound the car I drove there. It turned out dude was a crack head unknown to me and his family and had signed the title over to a drug dealer and he put a warrant out for him on theft of property. So anyways my mom and dad sent me a plane ticket so I could get back to Tennessee. My grandparents were mad so I had to go to Tennessee. So I get to Tennessee same old life I worked some on and off jobs and kicking it with a new friend named Derrick Glover we hit up malls, strip clubs anything we could get into we did it. During this time I again went to work again for Kirby why I don’t know, but I would sell tons of vacuums and get paid nothing I had bout a new car from the lot a geo metro we stripped the springs out of it and added a system thing were good then everybody was giving me credit I had gold $1000 watches and shit thinking

I was living the big life even though all of it was financed and I had no way of paying It back. A major turning point was when my friend Derrick died, but around that time I met an ex girlfriend and we kind of rekindle for a few months. I moved in with her but the pressures were too much soon they came and reposed my car and I moved back to Michigan to start anew.

Right before this I remember I did my first music tracks. I was working at Arby’s and my old school friend Chad Ensey who worked there went to my house after work ,my parents were gone and we hooked some headphones up to a mic port on my computer and we recorded our first track. And Even though we never could get it off the computer. We ended up recording a few songs on tapes. I was definitely what you call a shitty rapper then. People would laugh at me, and I got more picked on. We would spend Friday nights, Chad, Timmy Cook and Keith Cook and I would cruise the back roads getting drunk and high bumping our music. So anyways when I got to Michigan my grandparents bought me a ford escort my grandmother made me get my ged things were looking up. I made lots of new friends I was known as Tennessee cause of my southern draw and it turned people on to me.

Soon I was one of the most popular people in Fenton, Michigan. I moved out of my grandparent’s house and in with some friends.

There was a lot of weed and weed selling. I never really sold it but they did and when I say a lot I mean pounds of it. Eventually my grandparents got worried about me after I got caught by the cops with seeds in a tic tac container. So they suggested I move to Texas with my grandfather’s brother seeking change I said ok. Along the way I won 300 bucks playing on the river boat in Louisiana. Good memory. So anyways my grandparents dropped me off with my car and they went back to Michigan. Little did I know these people they moved me in with who were Mormons. No tobacco, no drugs, no caffeine. They argued like cats and dogs. I used to watch this lady beat my grandfathers brother with car doors it was bad. Around this time the whole master p buzz was going on and I loved it, it made me want to do music even more, but I was still a year away from doing it full time. I dibbed and dabbed on tracks by this time I had like 5 tracks I had done up till this point. I remember I would visit this movie theater like 3 or 4 times a week and watch movies by myself.

It was there I met this girl and we started kicking

it. She introduced me to other people and such.

But I believe this is where I really found out there was a higher power looking out for me.

One night at a party I found my girl in the bathroom having sex with another dude. I snapped, I beat the dude to a pulp, then I left the party soon after. The bad thing with this was this girl’s dad was the local police chief and I was told if I didn’t leave there would be warrants signed. So as I was finding my way out of Texas, I also learned this same girl who cheated on me had Aids. We had never had sex or anything and I truly believe this was god looking out for my well being. Anyways one night I couldn’t take it I went out got some bud and got stoned like ive never been stoned. I came back to the house and they said oh hell no and sent me packing. So back to Tennessee I went, my brother let me come an stay with him in his one bedroom trailer in Unionville, Tennessee and a whole new hell came. My brother felt like he was my mom and dad and started bossing me around which didn’t work out well. I became reunited with Chad Ensey aka tragic at this time and we started dipping in music again laying tracks. Nothing major but it was still music. Anyways one day I

met this girl we clicked and for the next 7 years I entered a whole new chapter of life.

CHAPTER 7 START OF A MUSIC DREAM So anyways me and Amber started dating. At first things were great she would come stay the night with me or the other way around and eventually I moved in with her at her parents’ house. At this time I still had a hard time holding a job. I worked a painting job for a while with my friend Timmy Cook, but after I caught word of my girl missing another dude that soon fell apart I couldn’t work thinking she was going to cheat. But eventually I found a job and with this job would come babies, And a major break in music, and pure hell.

In 1998 I got a great paying job with Ford Motor Credit. I did collections for them on past due car notes. Things were going great I had got us a place to live, bought us 2 cars, satellite TV, internet and a dream come true a recording studio.

After work and on my off days I was recording music and in due time tragic came back in the picture and our music was growing as were we. Then on April 16th 2000 I had my son Hunter Stanley born. What a great moment I was a father to a child I could actually see, things were great, me and amber were happy even

though she hated the music dream. In fact she couldn’t stand it. But a dreams are dreams and you have to go for it and I did. All of 1998 was great everybody got along family life was great it was perfect probably for the only time in my life.

My parents accepted me everybody loved me.

But then came heartbreak. It turns out in my department there was this gay dude who had a big crush on me I wasn’t down, I’m not gay and never will be and he didn’t get it. So he kept harassing me and I had to report him, at first nothing was done, they pulled him in the office and reprimanded him, but the crush soon turned to retaliation for telling on him. So I had 2 option straight mess dude up and beat him down or go to a higher authority at Ford. So I wrote the President of Ford, a Mr. Jack Nasser and explained to him the situation. Within weeks I was fired and the other guy lost his bonus but was allowed to keep his job. So for the next 9 months we lived off of $255 week unemployment during this time I did nothing but music. A few months into my unemployment tragic came by the house and said you want to meet powder p. If ya’ll don’t know who dude is look up the song Ghetto Cowboy by Bone Thugs n Harmony. I said hell yeah knowing just months

before dude was #1 on billboard. So we went to another new person id meet Big Smo’s house..

That night we free styled in dude’s living room for over an hour and that night unknown to all of us a group was formed.

Starting the very next week we hit my studio hard and even thought the music sucked I was rapping with a dude who had a hit song with Bone. Overnight I knew that music was my calling. I started putting in 110 percent at this time we still weren’t doing many shows but we were definitely putting work in on the tracks over the next year members came and went but me and powder p always remained we were best friends and each others go to man. All of sudden people knew my name id get stopped in town by everyone, and it felt good for the first time in my life people actually wanted to talk to me they looked up to me not because of what I had done but because who my friend was it really did feel good, and it helped to form me as the man I am today. When powder p came into the picture it was a fake dream from the get go unknown to me for many months there was reason why dude was here and not with Bone. He had gone crazy in every sense of the word. He spoke in tongues, wrote his own language some crazy shit went

down. But never the less we kept making music little did I know I was becoming a known person but at the same time I was looking a fool. Dude would promise fame which never came which in turn made me scream it to the world only to be seen as a joke when what I said wouldn’t go down I looked like a liar just like I had when I was younger even though I thought everything was the truth. Also it was around this time I would meet Josh Carney. Who little did I think would end up being one of my life long friends.

Then around this time in came my beautiful daughter Hailey born on February 18th 2002. I knew she was something special the first time I saw her. She still to this day is one of the only people who truly support me in this music. She is a deep inspiration to me as long as my other kids. But the first song I ever wrote for my kids was the one called H.U.N.T.E.R. I know copies still exist but I haven’t come across one in years.

During this time we were having a hard time paying rent because unemployment was running out so we were forced to move back into Amber’s parent’s house. Around this time is when I first met the mother to my last child Andrew Stanley Jr but then she was only 12 and I never talked to her had just knowing her as a

sister to a friend of mine. But anyways Ambers sister was always hell on wheels and eventually got me kicked out and so for 3 months or so I was homeless living in my car after that brief period of time I got a job making sharpie pens and got us a trailer in Shelbyville. Things were not good but they weren’t bad either. Next door our neighbors did music so we made music at my house and I was making music at Powder P’s it was around this time in 2002 I first got to meet bone and go on shows with them.

CHAPTER 8 MY FIRST GLIMPSE OF FAME Now I’ve up to this point id seen the life fame brings but have never lived it totally. I was about to see it firsthand. And in 2002 was the first time. I had received this flier stating Layzie Bone would be coming though on his L-burner tour so I told powder about it and we went to the show in Murfreesboro. We got in to the club and sat down on some stools which felt like forever, powder was like go to the VIP and tell dude I’m here and to get Lazie so I did and the only thing that happened was the bouncer told me to go sit down and drink another beer, I couldn’t believe he didn’t believe me at all. So I went and sat back down after about 45 min someone with Lazies camp came through and powder recognized him within minutes we both had a fifth of whisky and where in vip. You should of see the bouncers face he couldn’t believe it.

After that night we were invited to tag along on 4 or 5 shows which we did and after a week it was over as quick as it started. Back then our music sucked and I see now why nothing happened, so me and powder went back to work in the studio around this time I started driving to music row

and pitching our music all by myself. Well one day I went up there by myself and handed out like 50 cd’s and by the time I got home powder called and said he had 2 record labels that wanted to meet up with us so off to Nashville we went. That night me powder p, Carlos Arroro and Josh Carney went to music row which would be many trips that week. We were given money every time we went they were telling us they could make millions off us in Japan among all places. We thought our time had come and powder thought he was going big again, but unknown to us this label packed up and left town before anything when down another setback.

As you can see by now there has been nothing but setbacks in my life but I keep going so learn from that people never give up.

So we kept doing music powder kept getting higher and drunker and eventually turned to cocaine now I’m proud to say I’ve never touched the stuff but powder it ruined him but this a book about me not him so let’s keep it Rollin. So for the next good bit we just kept doing music kept plugging away me and Big Smo had a falling out over tragic who at this time had done been kick to the curb. See jealousy can destroy friendships and I’ve lost so many though the years all over

bullshit. So as powder p became more involved with crack I became less involved with him we eventually got to where we didn’t talk for months I had started messing with Anthony Simmons more and more and less of powder p. eventually me and powder p hooked back up and started doing major music again but this time when had upgraded studios and mics and our quality was top notch. Then came our next chance with Bone. This time we hooked up with them before they even came into town they were wanting powder p to do ghetto cowboy 2 and all was set to go down at this time me and amber were kind of split up I was living in a hotel room in Nashville driving to powders house everyday and this one Friday night we were supposed to hook up with bone on their grey goose tour but when we got to the clubs all plans were out the window we were supposed to meet them in vip but they ended up scarping the vip because of the crowd on hand so now we are scratching our head like how are we supposed to get close to Bone . So I came up with a plan I got a big poster board and inched my way to the front of the crowd during their performance and on the poster was a big arrow pointing to the left that said powder p they eventually saw it and powder

was pulled on stage in the middle of the set.

After the show was over I met them out back and that’s when I got to go on tour the second time again it lasted a week and we were back home soon afterwards me and Amber got back together and got into public housing. Again I stopped really messing with powder because of the drugs I was barely surviving and if it wasn’t for my grandparents I would have been without cars or money. During my life I always bummed money from my grandparents, sometimes I would lie to get money loaned to me and to this day I’m very ashamed of that. But you have to realize nobody is perfect and we all make mistakes and I’ve made my fair share of them. All you can do is learn from your mistakes and build from it and pray they forgive you. A lot of people think I mooched off of them but I really didn’t it is just they had money and in your times of need you have to ask the ones who have it. It wasn’t me using them or conning them even though to this day ive it thrown at me on a weekly basis by my parents. So anyways during this time me and my youngest babies mom we became good friends never any sex or kissing just friends. She was a good person I could spill my guts to her and she would always be there. So during the next year

my 3rd oldest son Alex James Stanley was born.

Still to this day I feel like he has got the least amount of attention from me. Ive never been the father I should have been because of my desire for this music. But as you can see ever since early on I have had a good chance at getting success only if I just keep plugging and that’s what I did and still do it to this day. My grandmother always told me if you try hard enough all things are possible and I still firmly believe this today. Why when a doctor goes to school for 12 years is that acceptable and a good thing but as a rapper you spend the same amount of time perfecting your skills are you labeled a failure? During those years me and small time together got us a studio building on the square of Shelbyville. We spent so many countless hours in there its crazy, I would go into things that happened there but something’s are better left un said. But here is where I met sway mac who you will hear about later on. We had a lot of people come through who dude music here even powder p who I had to kick out for snorting coke on my office table. Which fueled our beef even more!

During this time it’s almost like we became competition for another rapper to do something big out of Shelbyville by the name of Big Smo

until recently was the driving force behind haystack.Then one night I saw my life flash in front of my eyes!

CHAPTER 9 DEATHS FACE

One night me, small time and Josh Carney were at the studio when my heart went crazy, I had a heart beat over 300 beats per minute and it would not stop. So small time loaded me up in his car and away we went to the hospital. About the time we got there it had slowed back down so they sent me home saying nothing was wrong.

Soon after I got a good job at crusader rent to own as an account manager, things were going good, around this time me and small time went our separate ways the studio was shut down and I was now doing music back home.

My heart problems were becoming more relevant by this time. Instead of yearly episodes I was having monthly then weekly episodes I was definitely getting sicker. During this time I believe I really accepted god into my life ive never been to church but I needed help but since I lacked health insurance the only thing I could do was pray to god. And at the time I thought I never received an answer I was soon going to find out that he did indeed answered my prayers.

Eventually I was going to the hospital almost every day I had been on meds for a good part of

my life and my body had become immune to which made my condition worse. I was being life flighted now almost every time once to Huntsville, Vanderbilt twice. And there was no end in sight. This is the only time in my life that I truly wanted to kill myself, finally my prayers got answered. One morning I was life flighted to Vanderbilt then they stabilized me and set me home by 9pm that evening I was rushed to the local hospital where they helplessly tried to find a hospital to take me finally after a lot of fighting Vanderbilt agreed to take me. So the next morning I was rushed by ambulance to Vanderbilt where over the next few days they assessed my condition and came to the conclusion that surgery was the only option. I had what they call several things. A. Ariel fib and b. ventricular tachycardia. By themselves its treatable together they are deadly. The problem was my heart was beating so rapidly it allowed blood to just pool in the heart which combined with the irregular heartbeat caused a high risk for blood clots which equals stroke or death. So finally they got me in to the operating room and did a full electrical mapping of my heart after 10 hrs they found the bad nerve responsible for my problem they in turn used a laser and burnt the

nerve in half severing that electrical pathway in sense curing my condition but that could be far from the truth. After the surgery I thought about death more than ever so much it consumed me and my music. Now from then on I have had intense panic attacks which are so bad I think I’m dyeing, I’ve tried getting social security but according to doctors I’ve been cured. So denied.

Ever since then it’s been even harder to keep jobs. I’m scared the daily stress of working will cause me more problems so I didn’t work out of fear of death.

Also ever since this point in my life I have put in extra hard work on music cause I now firmly believe if I don’t make it in music my kids will never have anything since I believe I’ll be dead before 40. Also with 4 kids how can a regular job help me.

I also lost a lot of love for family during this time cause for that whole time I spent in the hospital my girl came once and my parents a few times. Here I was possibly going to die and they all were too busy to visit me that hurt me badly and it’s a hurt ill probably never be able forget.

After the heart surgery I was supposed to follow up with a heart doctor and couldn’t because I had no money or insurance. So my mental issues in a

sense got worse. When you face death like I did it causes you to question your whole existence.

Why am I here? What’s my purpose? Who’s real in your life? Who can you trust? And who do you love? These are still questions I wonder about daily.

CHAPTER 10 LIFE AFTER DEATH

Life after the heart surgery has not been all that good. I’ve had continued skipped heart beats and I’ve learned to deal with it. It keeps me stressed almost every day. Well anyways weeks after my heart surgery I was fired from my job cause I was now a liability and they couldn’t afford the risk of me falling sick on the job so I was let go then days after losing my job I was coming into the house one day and there was my girl Amber and powder p fucking all I could do was turn around and leave. I ended up that night at Aprils house the girl who was always there for me eventually we ended up getting together and I moved in with her and her parents. Things went good I had this new car I had bought but it to soon was going to go since I lost my job and couldn’t pay for it. This was a another stab in my back by my family. Yes I hadn’t payd my car notes and yes my car was out for repo because I couldn’t hold a job and pay for it. But the bad part was one night they tried to repo my car, but with my experience with ford motor credit I know the laws on repos.so they came and I ran them off and told them they were trespassing and

if they wanted the car they would have to get a write of possession. They left, so knowing they were going to attempt to get it again I parked the car behind the house where they would have to back it up to get it out and it was out of reach from the tow truck driver. So the very next night my girls mother was like someone’s in your car out back. I knew it was the repo guy but they failed to follow one law, to knock on the door and announce their presence. So I came out kindly asked dude to get out of the car and when he refuses I tried throwing a cinder block through the window. But for some reason it wouldn’t break it so by this time dude in the car freaking out, he called the police and they came.

I explained to the police that he failed to identify himself and refused to give them the car. But then the cop said the guy in the car could sign a warrant on me for assault with a deadly weapon.

I told the repo guy to do what he had to and he left. The very next day I found out exactly how true my family was to me. Little to my knowledge my brother had told them where I lived and that’s how they found the car but it don’t stop there guess who came and picked the car up the next day my very own brother and he did it all for a 12 pack of beer. Sold out by your

very blood for a $9 pack of beer what a great family. So anyways the cars gone but I still managed to keep my studio through all of this I still had my mic and my equipment so I to keep my mind off my heart and life and I poured myself into music full force. My grandmother stepped in and loaned me money to get another car, more family drama soon followed. I heard the words con artist more and more and more April being as supportive as she has always been I started racking out the songs I started doing a lot more shows at tc’s and pop a top and started getting my name back. I had requests for tons of features, MySpace had taken off by then and I spent a lot of time promoting my music. Me and April ended up both working for Hardees in Murfreesboro but eventually lost our job then we got kicked out of her parents house so powder p let us stay with him for a week or so till we got our first check from Wendy’s where me and her now worked, here is where I met jgrimes through powder p we all even did a show at main st bar in Murfreesboro where things took another tragic turn. Powder p snapped and got back on dope so off I was done messing with him again we eventually got a place at cross court apartments where we lived for the next year. I met a good

friend while living there who I did music for awhile with me his name was Lawrence Bradford. He has since moved to New York but we still talk on the internet and do music together. Cross court was a trash haven for real I’m talking murders, shootings you name it I saw it but we kept our resolve. One thing led to another and we lost our jobs at Wendy’s which eventually got us evicted from the apartments so we moved to Searcy trailer court and barley survived. We lived there for about a month and I got a very good job selling cars just like with Kirby I rose up in the ranks and eventually became bestselling car salesmen. Towards the end I was having bad panic attacks and I kept getting screwed out of money. This would be the last job I’ve held up to the present day. I also a year earlier had all my teeth removed due to the effects of heart surgery and the drugs they gave me. I now where dentures which my parents were kind enough to buy for me and clearly losing my teeth were the best option. My vocal skills became better my delivery became better shit everything got better. No more toothaches for once in years I was not in pain, but that still didn’t get rid of my panic attacks. But back to the cars I was making some months 3000 bucks

but it was the last month I was there that I banked I closed my December out with a $10,000 commission check. I hit the jackpot and finally thought I’m were god wants me I starting to think for once maybe my calling wasn’t music but that was short lived. Then came January they called me into a meeting to explain they over paid me by $4000 buck and that they needed their money back I told them I didn’t have it and they said they had to rewrite a car deal which we have to move to January’s sale instead of December which nulls your bonus and extra commission for selling the 15th car. I told them again I couldn’t pay it back and they said cool but you don’t get a check again till it’s all paid so I quit but they didn’t except it and gave me $1000 bucks to get me through but then they said id also have to pay that back so I left work that day let down again and I quit and never went back. About this time jgrimes had run into trouble so I brought him to live with me which was a big help since he would pay us 500 month.

But that isn’t the reason I brought him down. A lot of people will say that I used dude for his money, but I could care less about his money, even though it did help us out greatly. Now we were living just off his check and cd sales on the

streets. Me and grimes started grinding big on the music we put out like 50 songs in 6 months, sold over 3500 cd’s out the truck of the car and where getting our new group the Villan Boyz name out there. Then we eventually got evicted from this apartment we were living in. 5 months before I lost my car job we had my last son Andrew jr. seeing him born was great to me because I should be dead and I have a new son so he definitely brightened my eyes. Anyways We ended up moving to State Street in the Murfreesboro a ghetto for those of you who don’t know. And bigger things were on the horizon from here on out

CHAPTER 11 2008-2009 THE GOLDEN YEARS

As the years went by the better I got at sound engineering, at doing graphics, and web and video design. I learned all these skill since it was the only way for me to ever do music. While on State Street we started filming music videos got more involved in graphics. In late 2008 early 2009 the graphics paid off we were making about 150 wk just by doing graphics or MySpace pages for people. We often would trade services to big artists like kool daddy fresh and the south central cartel. They did songs for us in return for MySpace design, but still at this time my skills were not perfected totally. After kool daddy fresh made quite a few visits to my crib on state street we became the go to people in town for music. a lot of people will say this is a lie but the truth is we were messing with more people than anybody in town. We were doing some shows but the internet at this time was our main game.

Yet we felt we were still missing something we would soon find it. After the murder of a close friend we did music with ,me April and grimes thought it be best if we move out of town so we moved back to Shelbyville and that’s where our

hustle began to get us attention. First we were blown off in Wal-Mart by big smo so we started a smear campaign against him it was probably not the wisest move considering everybody was down with dude but we did it anyway. Also at this time we started this lie that we were signed with Sony. It got us front page news in the paper, a ton of new fans and a lot for record sales. Still at this time were just selling cd-rs we invested in a printer that printed cds and off we went. We started doing shows every weekend and that didn’t let up for years also once we got to Shelbyville I hooked back u-p with sway mac from my younger days and the villan boyz were complete we started making top notch music, and that’s when we started our internet tv show which would prove successful and stressful at the same time. The format for the show allowed live chats with the audience and this in turn led to the whole new breed of haters and many more connections. At first it was just spammers trying to steal our audience then as people saw the show more and more they labeled us fakes.

Some of that was our fault other times it wasn’t.

The stress level kept building. We eventually got a green screen to improve the show and off we went. Now we were the talk everywhere, we

blended comedy and real life and of course our music. A lot of people got mad cause we played our music a lot so we started to include local rappers on the show and started getting a lot of love. Then hard times fell on us again. We had a chance to move to Florida and start a new so sway mac jgrimes me and April and lil Andrew packed the van up and off we went to Florida.

Our first stop was Daytona beach we arrived a week after spring break and we managed to land a few shows everything was looking great. We stayed in Daytona for about a week we tried to find work cause we really liked it there but eventually we had to move on so we loaded up and headed for Miami it was a great trip for the most part except for the high speed chases that ended with a totaled car on the interstate and so we got stuck in traffic for many many hours.

Eventually we got to Miami but the place we were suppose to stay at was a dirty 2 bedroom home filled with crack heads so the next morning we decided to go back to Daytona but we soon realized we couldn’t stay there we ended up doing a few more shows there then we headed off to Orlando. We stayed in Orlando for a few day during this trip we had no pot or alcohol but after all the let downs we bought a bag of bud

and god fucked up. We stayed in Orlando a few days and decided we need to pack it up and go back home to Tennessee so that’s what we did.

Along the way in Florida we ran out of cash several times and if it not had been for josh carney and my grandparents we would have been in major trouble. So we made it back to Tennessee much to our amazement our trailer still was how we left it and we went back to living but by this time we were a month behind on rent so we had to move again. We ended up renting a 3 bedroom house in Shelbyville. It was great to live in a house for the first time in years but tragedy was about to strike!

CHAPTER 12 MY BELOVED GRANDMOTHER PASSES

I will remember July 7th 2009 forever, it was the day my beloved grandmother passed. When I first got the call I couldn’t believe it I had just talked to her days before my mom and daughter were up there visiting and then I get this call. My mother called and said grandma had a heart attack she’s stable but they can’t get her blood pressure right it don’t look good please pray for her. I hit my knees and prayed but the next day she passed away. I couldn’t help but to think of the trips we took all the help she offered me, everything she did for me, and I just lost it. This time I found myself mad at myself, mad at god I didn’t know what to do. For the first time in my life something was beyond my control. All these years I told her before I die I will show you that everything I did was for a good cause. I wanted to make it big before she died so I could pay her back for everything her and my grandfather did for me. But now it was too late I failed her I failed myself. A week before she passed I had kicked jgrimes out he had moved to Indiana it seemed like everything was falling apart. What

would I do now? By this point in life my parents have done all but disown me. I was at that time the lowest I’ve ever been. Immediately things turned into arguing. I wanted to bring my kids up there for her funeral but my parents said no but I stood firm and took them. How couldn’t I the last picture of my grandma was with my daughter on her lap taken no more than a week before so yeah I took them which caused a lot of drama then my parents got mad cause I wanted to drive my van up there, they wanted to be in control like always and were mad cause they weren’t. so on the way to Michigan right before we got to Cincinnati we had less than 30 bucks for gas and our tire blows out with no spare, now I’m panicking oh my god im going to miss her funeral but thank god for the nice people in the tire shop who gave us a tire so we were back on our way. We arrived in Michigan safe and sound and you could smell the anger from my parents as soon as we arrived. My grandpa wasn’t feeling well since he lost his wife of 50 years it was not a good time at all. The next day we went to my grandma’s visitation and that’s when it all sunk in. I still cry tears like I am right now as I write this. Everything went smooth till it came time to ride to cemetery and bury her. My

parents got mad cause I rode with my grandfather up there when they thought I should be in the other car watching my kids with April which she has no problem doing. More drama like I needed anymore of that. So i stood firm and rode up there. Anyways after the funeral my grandfather kindly bought me 4 new tires for the van and a few days later I was back off to Tennessee. Late on rent again because I was gone for over a week shit kept stacking up. On the way back I hooked back up with grimes in Indiana and decided to go to Tennessee pack my stuff and move there so that’s what we did. Sway mac of course felt betrayed but given the circumstances I believe he saw my intentions.

So we made it to Indiana safe and sound but once we got there we were right back in hell.

The people jgrimes was staying with were straight powder p crazy. Constant drama so much I never came out the room. I was labeled a bad dad, a no good loser how can’t anyone have a kind heart knowing I just lost my grandmother I don’t get it. But a blessing happened.

Remember the son I said I had earlier but almost got killed going to see well I found out he lived no more than 5 miles from me. Another proof to me there is a god above. So I wrestled every

ounce of energy I had and called he wasn’t home but his grandparents were and they said they actually had been trying to get a hold of me.

What a relief I thought I can finally be a part of my sons life. Wow was I wrong. From the get go they wanted me in the picture to get out the dude who beat me down previously. But then to my surprise his step dad wanted me to be in his life so I thought cool this going to work but little did I know there was this big beef between him and the grandparents and I was being used as a pawn between the 2. Both sides started asking me to go to court in their favor and all this other shit, and to top it off my son had this bad image of me for not being around, which I can’t blame him but considering the circumstances what could I have done different I don’t know. I feared for my life ever since that day so I stayed away to give him peace. So anyways shit ended up boiling over in Indiana where we were living at I had no money and nowhere to go so we headed back to Tennessee.

CHAPTER 13 BACK IN TENNESSEE

So here we are just moved back to Tennessee living with Aprils parents again. At first things were great we were looking for work still doing music almost daily to keep my mind off my grandmother and my panic attacks and then first her oldest brother gets out of jail and comes back. We have had our problems in the past dude is a very selfish self centered person who will do anything to get his way. At first things were great dude was coming to shows with me helping me where I needed help and it was going good making a little money off the music. It was here when I finally got my music on all the stores like iTunes. We even had our songs bumping in local strip clubs and such. Things were looking up, I still had my problems like each man has and still I continue to work on them then her other brother comes home from prison. Also jgrimes had been having problems in Indiana and trying to find a way out so after a lot of begging her parents let us go get him and bring him down to live with us. The only thing grimes had to do was pay 150 month in rent well anyways around Christmas time which has to be another low point of my life

I was out selling cds and got a call from April she stated her brother drug her around the house by her hair and me and grimes were so angry we calmed ourselves down and said we can’t go back there if we do we going to kill dude so we ended up spending a week in Lewisburg Tennessee at this girls house. I broke up with April just out of anger at the fact I couldn’t do anything to get us out the situation we were in. after Christmas we moved back into Aprils moms house. Things went good at first but by this time her parents and brothers we trying to find away to get us out since Tim who had just came back from prison needed a place to stay. It all boiled over one day when grimes was 10 bucks short on rent. Her brother john came out one morning and peeled all my emblems off my van and keyed it up in retaliation for grimes not paying rent. I went nuts. I tried to shatter dudes brand new flat screen tv but I was held back and her parents couldn’t see why I was so mad go figure. Also john and his brother Tim raped April when she was 12 so it was best we leave before I killed dude so that’s what we did.

So we moved to Murfreesboro Tennessee and stayed with an old friend but after a week or so there jgrimes bailed on me and moved in with

powder p. so after helping this dude in his time of need he bails on me in my time of need some friend. It was probably for the best so another 2 or 3 weeks went by and the people we were staying with’s landlord threw a fit cause we were there so they acted like they were getting divorced to kick us out still do this day I don’t know why they didn’t just ask us to move. So off we went to a hotel at this time April is working making mouthwash and all looks like we can make it . but after 6 days in the hotel we get kicked out cause we had our dog with us so there we are again homeless then a old friend I had help years earlier offered us a place to stay with him. So we move in it was kind of a rundown trailer but it was better than nothing all went all right the first month but dude we lived with was a big drinker and would get trashed and all kinds of shit but we stuck it out he also had this bum dude who lived there I had to feed which caused some beef. So we were paying the cable and internet bringing in 600 in food to the house a month doing our part but that was not enough for them so things broke down one day and he asked for more money we said no and we were immediately kicked out. This brings us to the present day

CHAPTER 14 2011 to 2013

So here we are living in a hotel in Murfreesboro, Tennessee still doing music, Aprils working making 300 a wk but after hotel rent diapers and other expenses we can’t save nothing. Everybody says it’s my fault because I don’t work but now that really is not possible since I’m here watching my son from 10 am till almost 9pm every night but sat and Sunday. How can you find a job babysitting a kid you can’t. So I’m here still plugging away at my music dream hoping for a big break so I can give my family the live they deserve. My family has all but disowned me; I lost all my friends, all my family all over music. My drive is still strong and I keep a level head by holding on to hope. I still have panic attacks, I’m stuck in this room 24 hours a day 7 days a week with no end in sight. I spend most my spare time building up my site thevillanboyz.com which as ya read come 2012 is defunkt, doing music , shooting videos, and doing the occasional show hoping for a break.

By 2012 jgrimes had come back into the picture I had a nice 200000 house and even had gotten to a point where I even owned a limosine. Around that time we had opened for warner brothers artist big smo and after jgrimes left the group after about a 8 months I even did an event with tim the moonshiner. Before grimes had left the group we had done 20 shows with the elise cole band in some small and medium venues. And as I stated above grimes eventually left the group and then after a few months and then misys love and rocket rob came into the picture during this period of time we made some amazing music and made some of the best songs still to this day. But once again we were all ignored and with most of the others in the group not having the same desire and ethic I had they eventually all moved on by 2013 I was found doing music with real talk and once again we were pumping out great songs. But like always nothing lasts forever real talk moved back to his old ways with drugs and such and I had to part ways with him.

Ever since then its really just been me doin my own thing. Moving into 2015 I have to say im working harder then ever to make something big happen during 2013 and 2014 I was arrested on 3 occasions by 2 different local rappers one being a big warner brothers artist in the end I won all three cases and still could care less about these dudes. Mu focus is to make great music and do the best I can for those around me. As humans we all make mistakes and all we can do is ask for forgivness and hope the world accepts that. I have high hopes for 2015 and I hope you all so far have enjoyed my story I could have gone in much more detail about my life but I feel it best to keep the book the way it is

I hope to have you all as fans and that we can be friends at the same time. You can always find me on facebook at facebook.com/therelaizy or facebook.com/aizywayne or my website at www.aizywayne.com

CHAPTER 15 IN CLOSING

Now I believe I’ve failed at many things in life. But we still need to know that the future is still yet to be written. My typical day now consists of promoting myself on the internet in my never ending quest of fame and riches.

And every day it seems I’m being reminded of my failures. I get so tired of hearing everybody telling me im a bad father you think I don’t know this, or a bad rapper, or a bad singer or just a plain bad person. Then occasionally I get that “wow” you are so talented with some saying I’m one of the best they ever seen or heard.

So nowadays my mind is so confused I don’t know the real from the fake.

But I do look at the facts even though some don’t think I do And in all honesty I sell about 2 songs a month on iTunes netting me “not much money”

Now I look at the other side of picture I see my girl and all my kids doing without because my inability to really hold a job and in turn I

throw myself into the music for that never ending dream.

But I also see a future deep in my brain. I have always read all through human history that you can accomplish whatever you set your mind on and when you really believe in something to never let go and don’t stop till you get it.

Life’s like the lottery. I can promise you with 100 percent accuracy that if you never buy a lottery ticket you will never win the lottery.

True?

I do know this if you do play the lottery and you play it enough your numbers will hit that much is true.

I look at life like this. I know that if I just lived the life everybody lived I could live a meaningful existence.

But my life goal is to give my kids the life they deserve. They don’t deserve this life they are living right now. And the way I see it and if you were in my shoes you would see it to that I may well not live to be an old man. Maybe I’m wrong which I hope I am. So I want to leave my

kids with something that will help them their whole life and that’s financial security. My grandparents helped me and I shall do the same for my kids somehow some way.

More facts I could work a 7hr job and survive till I died. But still would have no health insurance. Whose going to pay the co pays?

But if I can just get my “lottery number” to hit my kids will have everything, and I to could possibly live longer. I could get my medical care, and once knowing I was perfectly good and stable I good be such a great person. But till then it’s just this life I live now.

I hope you have seen my true story and my true motives in life by reading this book. And maybe just maybe I still can come out this life a success known as a great father, a great son, a great grandchild. And a great musician. A great helper of the world! So god willing this won’t be the last you hear of me. Hopefully one day I go down as a legend in all circles.

ACKNOWLEGMENTS

I would like to dedicate this book to my grandmother, grandfather and my kids you all mean so much to me.

I would also like to thank god for giving me the talents that he has given me.

I’d like to thank powder p for giving me those great years of my life and to all who have helped me along this journey.

And in closing Please people go help support me just go to aizywayne.com and click the music tab and buy a few songs from the music player help make my dreams come true and buy some of our merch and music.

http://www.aizywayne.com http://www.youtube.com/lilaizy1 http://www.facebook.com/aizywayne http://www.facebook.com/therealaizy