we are family

For many people, family gatherings are far from relaxing.

Perhaps it’s the cousin who ignites a heated political debate or the aunt who always comments on how much weight you’ve put on since the last time she saw you. At any rate, stressful family gatherings have the tendency to be both physically and mentally draining. Take note of these helpful tips to pull you through your next extended-family shindig. You can thank us later.

PLAN AHEAD: There’s bound to be a spat or five when family gathers under one roof. Try to anticipate any problems that may come up with strategies for circumventing them. If your brother allows his children to run rampant and you are more safety conscious with yours, it may be wise to set up a fun—but calm—activity before everyone arrives.

DON’T OVERDO IT: To reduce stress at your next family event, pace yourself. Before the gathering begins, decide on some limits and stick to them. Instead of staying up late cleaning the house, set a time to put away the broom and head to bed or plan to stay at the party a couple of hours rather than the entire night.

PARENTS VS. GRANDPARENTS: Unsolicited advice from your children’s grandparents can seem like it’s meant to challenge your role as a parent. One way to handle tips that are out of line with your beliefs is to engage grandparents in an open conversation on how you have decided to handle the particular situation. It may also be helpful to keep in mind that just because advice was o ered does not mean you must take it to heart. A nod should do the trick.

NO ONE’S PERFECT: No matter what unexpected events disrupt your next family gettogether, try to face them with a smile. Dealing with problems optimistically can drastically

› By Laurel Gillum

reduce family tension. Burnt rolls? Better luck next year. This year, throw some extra brownies into the oven.

DIVVY UP: Splitting time between two di erent families during long breaks from work and school can get complicated. Try to implement a family rotation. Set vacation days in November aside for one half of the family and the month of December for the other half, if possible. If this idea doesn’t work for you, maybe you can host a family reunion at your house and invite both sides of the family to join!