CHANGE BEAT BACK CYBER ATTACKS

According to nobullying.com, roughly 160,000 students stay home from school to avoid being bullied in the United States alone. That is 160,000 too many.

Currently, if you are a cowardly bully, not only can you ostracize victims at school, you can humiliate them 24 hours a day thanks to social media. When used properly, social media can be an effective and entertaining form of communication. However, sometimes I don’t like what I see, and less than a month ago I decided that watching from the sidelines just wouldn’t do.

If you’re not clear on the devastating consequences social media has added to bullying, simply search for “bullying” on YouTube. There is an overabundance of tribute videos and fi rst-person webcam clips of bullying victims, some who later committed suicide. One who stood out to me was a beautiful high school freshman named Kristina Arielle Calco. In Kristina’s case, the bullying started in seventh grade and continued into high school. She is quoted in a tribute video as saying, “You should have heard what they said to me… it was torture and a living hell.” One night, after the straight “A” student and cheerleader returned home from her school’s winter formal, she hung herself in her basement.

These types of videos have opened an unprecedented dialogue in my classroom. Often, the end determination is pledges of tolerance for others and defi nite intolerance for bystanding. So imagine my disappointment when I noticed former students were bullying others, or being bullied, through social media. Recently, one former student enlisted others to ostracize and taunt another student, and as far as I could see, no one was doing anything. Suffice

No one egged my house or keyed my car. Some students thanked me for the reminder, and two said they loved me. I recently checked with the individual being harassed and as of this date, the bullying has stopped.

If we expect our children to behave in a certain manner, talking about it isn’t enough. To paraphrase Ghandi, it to say, I kept my keyboard dormant long enough. we need to be the change we want to see. If we do not act, we are no better than the students who stand by for fear of retribution, or the adults who simply can’t be bothered since it will never be their kid… until it is their kid.

I posted a message on several of my former students’ Facebook pages. I reminded them that bullies pick on people they know will not fight back and that makes it a cowardly act. I reminded them that many of us have acted as bullies or have been bullied, and most of us have been in both situations. I was a little concerned about retaliation against me or my daughter, but if I didn’t say anything how could I ever ask those students — or worse yet, my own daughter — not to be a bystander?

And you know what? I experienced no repercussions. Instead, I got a ton of “likes.” Two parents shared the post on their pages. No student unfriended me.

On Sept. 9, 2011, Jamey Rodemeyer posted the following on Tumblr: “I always say how bullied I am, but no one listens. What do I have to do so people will listen to me?” Shortly after 1:30a.m. on Sept. 11, 2011, Jamey took his own life. Children like Jamey sure have my attention.