HOW TO CHANGE YOUR MINDSET AND RESCRIPT THE REST OF YOUR LIFE
Clutter chaos
WHY WE KEEP STUFF (AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT)
dealing with the “other” grandparents RIVALRIES AREN’T JUST FOR SIBLINGS
Is your yard ready to get wild? HOW TO RESTORE NATURE’S BALANCE
If
Looking for maintenance-free living, but don’t want to sacrifice on aesthetics? Check out the Twin Homes at Forest Grove. Conveniently located in Saratoga Springs, these twin homes offer the perfect balance of convenience and comfort. Craftsman-style elevations, designed to blend in with the neighborhood’s single-family homes, give these twin homes great street appeal. Plus each twin home is a premium unit featuring open floor plans, windows on three sides and a private two-car garage.
When completed, Forest Grove will include a combination of over 300 single-family and twin homes, all in a beautiful wooded setting. Designed to make exploring the neighborhood easy, Forest Grove features sidewalks, street lamps, and 7+ miles of walking trails. Plus, residents will have access to a breadth of amenities. Visit
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At Hudson Headwaters, our primary care providers are dedicated to meeting your specific health care needs, and keeping you in good health. We’re here for you—at every stage and every age.
As we age, our risk of osteoporosis rises. Osteoporosis is a condition that causes bones to become weak and brittle. Older adults also lose muscle mass (a condition called sarcopenia). We need strong muscles to help us balance and reduce the risk of falling and breaking bones.
Exercise is one way to help build and maintain healthy bones and prevent falls and fractures. Adults of all ages should aim to get at least 150 minutes (2.5 hours) a week of moderate to high intensity exercise. This should include a mix of balance training, aerobic and muscle-strengthening exercises.
Weight-bearing exercises produce a force on bones that makes them work harder. Examples are:
• Brisk walking (3 to 4 miles per hour)
• Jogging or running
• Climbing stairs
• Hiking
• Tennis, badminton, ping pong, pickleball and other racket sports
Weightlifting adds resistance to movement to make muscles work harder and become stronger. These exercises put stress on bones, so they can make bones stronger as well. Examples are:
• Weight machines
• Free weights
• Resistance bands
• Use of your own body weight (such as pushups, pullups or total body resistance exercise (TRX)
Balance training is especially important for older adults. It can improve balance and help prevent falls. Examples are:
• Walking on an unstable surface (e.g., a foam mat or wobble board)
• Standing on one leg at a time (aim for 30 seconds on each leg 3 times a day)
• Tai chi
• Walking backwards
• Step-ups
• Lunges
• Shifting your body weight backward and forward while standing with both feet together or on one foot
18 Hear Us Roar!
Reimagining yourself in life’s next chapter
24 Loneliness: Tips on Facing the Next Epidemic Smile, be brave, just do it
Pinnacle Living at Forts Ferry, conveniently located in Latham, NY, redefines luxury resort-style living for those 55+. Spend your days asking yourself “what do I want to do today?” rather than listing what you have to do. Pinnacle Living features award-winning lifestyle and social programming with our SUN Program® giving our residents all the excitement they crave paired with the privacy they deserve. If you’re ready to create the lifestyle of your dreams all you have to do is take the first step towards Pinnacle!
• Fitness studio & gym
• Community clubhouse
• Movie theater
• Library & lounge
• Community gardens
• Indoor pool & sauna
• 1 and 2 bedroom apartments
• Outdoor entertainment spaces with fire pits
• Continental breakfast 5 days per week
53 Grandparent Rivalries
Dealing with the other family when your baby has a baby
57 Caregiver Stories
Help & hope after an Alzheimer’s diagnosis
61 The Capital Region’s ‘Best-Kept Secret’ Walking clubbers see the world one step at a time
67 Cycling Heaven
Exploring the Empire State Trail on two wheels
39 Toasting the Berkshires 4 inspired-by-the-region drinks to make at home
43 Asian-inspired Love Nonprofit aims to support New York’s Chinatowns
35 ‘Rewilding’ the World (and Our Own Backyards) Restoring nature’s balance can be rewarding to you — and your wallet
70 Tackling the Clutter Beast Tips from experts on how to make your home a sanctuary
29 Blooming & Beautiful
Visit some of the region’s public gardens
48 Great Girlfriends Getaways 3 components to a perfect vacation with friends
65 Be Your Best Hungry? Try These “Snacks”
74 The Vine Rod Michael on finding true love
…into the life you (re) imagine
Does the word “reimagine” resonate with you? Do you think about ways your life could have turned out differently? Do you think of all the things you still want to do and see?
There are no doubt some societal pressures urging us to slow down when we hit a pivotal age such as 50 or 60, but many of us will live at least another 30 years! Now is the time to reimagine the life you have yet to live, to embrace and enjoy this beautiful time.
As a self-professed late bloomer, I
love the concept of reimagining myself. It’s an idea that resonates with my mindset and I’m fully on board. I left an industry that I had worked in since graduating from college in 1989 to explore something that gave me more purpose. I met the love of my life at 38, got married a week shy of 40, had our son at 42, bought this business at 53, and feel, in many ways, that I’m just getting started.
When I learned about author Michael Clinton’s best-selling book ROAR: Into the Second Half of Your Life (Before It’s Too Late), I was instantly drawn to it and wanted to share it with our readers. For our story on page 18, writer Janet Reynolds met with Clinton via Zoom to talk about his ROAR Forward movement, which explores how to think more creatively about aging. Clinton is living proof that you can reimagine yourself and your life.
In his book, he reminds us not to succumb to the internal ageism that exists in all of us. We might unconsciously refrain from trying new things because we tell ourselves we’re too old. But when we eliminate the negative self-talk about aging that clutters our minds, we can make way for discovery. We can give ourselves the freedom to reimagine.
And, speaking of clutter, that collection of things lying about in an unti-
dy pile — the word itself almost feels messy and overwhelming, doesn’t it? We all have it, some more than others. Isn’t it true that the older we get, the more time we’ve had to accumulate things? As time passes, we tend to attach emotional significance to many of those things, and then we stuff our drawers with stuff to put it out of sight. Our attics and basements are filled with stuff accumulated from our own lives, and as we get older we often add stuff from our parents’ or grandparents’ lives, too.
Tackling clutter can feel like tackling a beast, but it doesn’t need to feel this way. We asked local experts how to make a home a sanctuary, one small step at a time. After reading the story on page 70, I already feel lighter!
“ To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow.”
— Audrey Hepburn
Willow Valley Communities resident, Jim Comey, says his philosophy on life comes from writer, Jonathan Swift: May you live every day of your life.
And that’s exactly what he does. A produced playwright and published author, Jim is the chair of the Willow Valley Communities Writers Group. He teaches Tai Chi and Qigong and performs in plays. And when he’s not doing all that, Jim’s found riding his motorcycle on the gorgeous country roads in Lancaster County. “This is a whole new world for me,” he says. “I have the freedom to enjoy life’s next adventures knowing that my wife and I — and our adult children — have the peace of mind of Willow Valley Communities’ Type A Lifecare for the future.”
Find your Life Lived Forward. Explore Willow Valley Communities today.
800.770.5445
Michael Clinton is always on the lookout for the next challenge. The former president and publishing director of Hearst Magazines, he has run marathons on seven continents, is a pilot, is the founder of a nonprofit foundation, has two master’s degrees, and, for his recent 70th birthday, hiked to the base camp for Mount Everest. And that was just a partial list of the accomplishments and pivots he mentioned when we talked by Zoom in February. Who knows what he’s done since!
Clinton is also an author, most recently of the bestselling book, ROAR: Into the Second Half of Your Life (Before It’s Too Late). The book, an overview of how to think more creatively about aging (although, frankly, the information is useful no matter what your life stage), is a primer on how to think about who you are now and who you want to become. In addition to helpful tips and strategies, it’s filled with stories of people — called “re-imagineers” — who have successfully pivoted for their next life chapter.
As he sums it up, “70 is the new 70, and
this is what you can do.”
With the average life expectancy in the U.S. now close to 80, the word “retirement” seems as antiquated as the 65-year-old standard retirement age created at a time when the average life expectancy wasn’t that much higher. In other words, people typically didn’t have a lot of time to consider doing something other than playing golf and taking up mahjong.
And yet despite this longer life expectancy, societal messaging around age still has many of us falling into thinking of retirement as a time of stepping back. Clinton’s book aims to change that.
“What happens for many people is the mindset as you get to 50-plus and your 60s … that you should be winding down, that you should think about retirement and moving to a sunny state and not working and not being engaged,” he says. “Once upon a time that was a good formula, but today we may live another 30 years and I think a complete reframing is required. Instead of winding down, we should all be thinking about rewiring.”
“If you look at the memes, The Golden Girls were in their 50s. Today the women in Sex in the City are in their 50s,” he continues, ticking off other older women like Oprah Winfrey (who just turned 70) and Ali McGraw (who is 84). “The images of people in their 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s are the trailblazers leading this movement, creating new images of what it means to be these ages.”
Clinton’s book is well timed for rethinking this next phase. The overarching strategy for thinking about, as he calls it, the second half of your life is easy to remember thanks to his helpful acronym.
Reimagine yourself
O wn who you are
Act on what’s next
R eassess your relationships to get you there
Clinton highlights tips to get the reimagining started in each chapter and ends each chapter with specific takeaways, including exercises and concrete suggestions for action. In the chapter “Reimagining Your Life Before Others Do It for You,” for instance, he suggests that readers make a list of all the things that are preventing them from living an authentic life. “Getting clear and being honest,” he writes, “is a powerful first step toward change.”
The chapter “Act Courageous and Don’t Look Back” ends by asking readers to decide to start something brand new. It can be big — a new work opportunity, perhaps, or downsizing — or something smaller, such as starting a hobby you always dreamed of trying. “These are all moves,” Clinton notes, “that will set you on a path to discovery.” And with discovery comes change.
That Clinton is a new guru of reinvention and rethinking aging is not that surprising. He’s been reinventing himself since his humble beginnings in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, where he put himself through college before heading to New York City with dreams of making it in the publishing world. He knows firsthand that sometimes dreams take time and failures often come before successes. The key is to keep going. Own, as he says in one of his book chapters, your SWOTs — strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats.
It’s also critical, he says, not to succumb to internal ageism, in which we unconsciously refrain from trying new things because we have bought into the idea that we’re too old to fill-in-the-blank. Clinton says that behavior is the top reason baby boomers step back rather than step into retirement opportunities.
Clinton realized this after interviewing nearly 100 re-imagineers for the book. “The number one thing that emerged (was) self-imposed barriers,” he says. “‘I can’t do that because I’m too old, that ship has passed.’ It’s all a false construct.”
Instead, he says, people need to be person-appropriate in their thinking rather than age-appropriate. “Break through your own barriers and you’d be amazed what you can do and accomplish,” he says.
In addition to eliminating negative selftalk about aging, Clinton also advises people to go back to their younger selves if they’re not sure how to reframe where they are now. “Was there something you left on the shelf in your early 20s?” he says. Often we’re steered by well-meaning parents away from passions that seem impractical — writing, or anthropology, for instance. “We all took the practical route. What is that thing and how do you activate it?” Clinton
(Clockwise from left) Patty Forehand was an elementary school teacher for over 30 years before she decided to pursue stand-up comedy. Adam Weiss worked as a CEO and later a consultant in the hospitality business before turning his passion for organic gardening into Pike Lake Gardens, which offers corporate wellness and sustainability programs. McGarvey Black decided at 52 to consider writing as a new career possibility. She’s now a bestselling author of mysteries and thrillers. Stephen Barr, a lifelong learner, has complemented his executive position in broadcasting with two master's degrees and the recent completion of a Juris Master from Cornell Law School.
“ I think a complete reframing is required. Instead of winding down, we should all be thinking about rewiring.”
— Michael Clinton
$26.00 | 176 pages get the book!
tells the story of a woman from the book who was in sales her whole life but always wanted to write mysteries. In her 50s, she decided to give it a shot. Today, at 66, she has five published mystery novels and has another on the way. “She reactivated her desire to be a writer,” he says.
If you’re not sure where to start, Clinton suggests playing what he calls the word game. Write five words that describe you. Not your roles, like mother, sister or doctor, but your traits, such as being loyal or funny. Then ask 10 family members and friends to do the same about you. Look for the places they match and where they don’t. “Take that word and start mining it and developing it,” Clinton says. “What you do with that word can take you into the future.”
Patricia Forehand, one of the book’s re-imagineers, did this. The No. 1 word that came up was “funny.” Today, the former elementary school teacher from rural Georgia is a stand-up comic. “She took that word and turned it into something,” he says.
Overall Clinton is hopeful about what
the future will bring for rethinking the next chapter. “People haven’t been able until now to start seeing role models of older people. You’re beginning to see all kinds of interesting stories about people,” he says, ticking off examples like people going back to school in their 60s or running their first marathon in their 70s.
While “OK boomer” folks would suggest otherwise, Clinton feels boomers are going to be the generation demanding change. “What I would argue is that boomers are the original activists,” he says. “We challenged Vietnam, sexism, racism, launched Earth Day. This generation is an activist generation. Now we’re becoming activists around aging. We’re creating role models for ourselves and also for the next generations.
“There’s a great old expression — you can’t be it until you see it,” he says. “Now, women and men are seeing role models to show there’s an inspiration.” n
For more information about rethinking aging, check out RoarForward.com.
The bad news is we’re in the midst of an epidemic (and we’re not talking about COVID-19). The good news is, we can do something about it. Experts say the state of loneliness, a growing public health concern in the United States impacting about 20 million older adults, is fixable. And New York’s new ambassador of loneliness most certainly agrees.
Celebrity “sexpert” Dr. Ruth Westheimer, most widely recognized as the sassy therapist, professor, author, lecturer, radio and TV personality, has pivoted to her new role with her usual spirit, commitment and straightforward attitude, positive that loneliness in older adults can be cured.
“We are living longer and that means we often find ourselves outliving friends and family members we did have connections with,” says the 95-year-old New Yorker, who was appointed to her new role last November. “A longer life isn’t necessarily a healthy life,” she adds.
“There are many seniors who are stuck in their homes and don’t get to see anyone for long stretches,” she continues.
“And these days most young couples both work so they have less time to spend with an elderly parent. But it still doesn’t mean you have to be alone.”
Westheimer, who knows firsthand about loneliness as she recalls her isolated teen years as a Holocaust orphan, adds that the COVID-19 pandemic isolated people even more, prompting the concerning spike in loneliness among older adults.
“Loneliness is nothing new,” she explains. “The good news is that you can change that.”
Multiple studies in recent years attest to the nation’s growing senior population, thanks to better medical care and technology and the aging baby boom generation. Loneliness and isolation as we age can contribute widely to both physical and emotional deterioration.
“We are not built to be alone, we are human beings,” says Emily Allen, senior vice president for the AARP Foundation. “We are social creatures and as we age, our lives change, our circumstances change.”
Older people tend to reduce their social interaction as they age because they think they can’t do things because of age-related limitations. “That is counterproductive,” she says.
Allen adds that one of the first steps to beating loneliness as we get older is to plan. “You make a financial plan for your retirement,” she says. ”You should be making a social plan as well.”
She recommends thinking about what you want to do when life circumstances eventually change. “What will your lifestyle choice be? What kinds of hobbies do you want to try? Who will be those friends in your life? Do it before you find yourself alone,” she says.
Mary Moller, executive director of the Albany Guardian Society, puts it very succinctly: “Be brave,” she says.
“You don’t have to be alone. There are so many activities and such accessibility to so many programs,” says Allen, whose agency travels around New York providing computer classes, art classes, exercise classes and more at libraries, senior housing complexes and senior centers.
“You have to make connections, accept help. If you can’t drive, learn how to use senior transportation, ask for a ride, learn to adapt,” she continues, noting that many programs are offered through Zoom, a connection that allows seniors to stay in their own homes and still have access to programs and other people. “Everyone should have a joy-filled life.”
Westheimer explains she lobbied for her new post because she saw a need and knew she could fill the bill when it came to addressing the loneliness epidemic and helping New Yorkers feel less lonely.
“Everybody is lonely once in a while, it’s part of the human condition,” says Westheimer. “If there is a silver lining to feeling that way, it is that by accepting your own bouts of loneliness you can use them as an impetus to reach out to others who may be lonely and help them.”
When Westheimer reached out to New York Gov. Kathy Hochul about the proposal, the governor replied with a resounding “yes.”
That isn’t the only step the state is taking when it comes to
EXPERTS AGREE that while isolation and loneliness in Americans over 60 years old is a problem across the United States, there are steps that isolated older people and their families can take to improve social connectedness and well-being.
Here are some suggestions:
For Seniors:
• Find an activity that you enjoy, restart an old hobby or take a class to learn something new. You will likely meet others with similar interests.
• Schedule time each day to stay in touch with family, friends and neighbors in person, by email, social media, phone or text. Sending letters or cards is another good way to keep up friendships.
• Use technology such as video chat, FaceTime and Zoom to stay connected with friends and relatives and to take advantage of online classes and discussions.
• If you’re not tech-savvy, sign up for an online or in-person class at your local public library or community center to help you learn how to use email and social media.
• If it is feasible, consider adopting a pet.
• Join a group at your local senior center, church, library or community center. Research the services and classes being offered.
• Take a walk with friends or even by yourself around your neighborhood, if possible. It’s good for your physical health and another way to socialize.
• Volunteer at a nonprofit, school, hospital or community organization. You’d be surprised at how much you can do to help.
• Be aware of relatives or friends who are spending too much time alone or showing signs of social deprivation. Listen to them and try to make time for phone calls and visits.
• Encourage and help older adults take advantage of community programs for seniors, and help them find proper transportation if they can’t drive. Be an advocate for setting up a plan that provides some social interaction.
• Encourage them to be open to trying new activities and visiting new places. Often all someone needs is a little push to try new things and meet new people.
• New York Office for the Aging: aging.ny.gov
• National Institute on Aging: nia.nih.gov
• Albany Guardian Society: albanyguardiansociety.org
• American Association of Retired Persons: aarp.org
• AARP Connect2Affect: connect2affect.org
“Loneliness is nothing new. The good news is that you can change that.”— Dr. Ruth Westheimer
addressing the issue. Hochul has also initiated a State Master Plan for Aging in tandem with the State Department of Health and the State Office for the Aging to help New York’s adults lead fulfilling lives as they age.
“One shouldn’t vegetate but be as active as possible,” Westheimer says, emphasizing there are many agencies, transportation services, online programs and simple lifestyle changes that can connect us with others. “That improves your morale and in the end makes you feel less lonely.”
Westheimer offers simple tips to seniors who long for more social interaction. “The first step is to admit that you are lonely and commit yourself to doing something about it,” she says. “Don’t say to yourself, ‘Well, I’m old, it’s expected that I’ll be lonely.’ It’s not.”
She also encourages seniors to reach out to family and friends and plan in-person get-togethers.
“It’s not enough to talk on the phone,” she says. “Make concrete plans to see each other.”
And finally, the famed therapist adds a really easy tip she suggests everyone should be doing, no matter their age.
“Try to smile as much as possible,” she recommends. “If you are grocery shopping with a frown on your face, no one is going to want to talk to you. So smile.” n
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Vernal pools, fairy gardens, acres of walkable landscapes — just some of the wonders of the region’s gardens
BY SHERYL NANCE-NASHSpring is ideal for shaking off the winter blues — and where better to do it than immersed in Mother Nature’s finest flowers, plants and trees in extraordinary gardens perfectly landscaped for strolling, reflecting and finding your Zen.
While some of the world’s best gardens are in far-flung locales like the Singapore Botanic Gardens, Kirstenbosch National Botanical Gardens in Cape Town, South Africa, and Jardin Majorelle in Marrakech, Morocco, there are some fantastic ones a lot closer to home. Here’s a look at a few of them.
Stockbridge, Massachusetts
The Berkshire Botanical Garden is a New England gem. It’s been around since 1934, cherished by locals and tourists. There’s a lot to love with 24 acres and dozens of garden spaces, like the pond garden, herb garden, the Daylily Walk, the Children’s Discovery Garden and the Foster Rock Garden, to name a few. One favorite spot is Lucy’s Garden, a topiary collection of 22 creatures and sculptures. In the historic renovated and restored 18th-century Center House, the Leonhardt Galleries host seasonal exhibits of works inspired by nature. Throughout the year there are special events like the Spring Hoppening, which includes egg hunts, a story walk, crafts, pony rides, games, food trucks and drinks.
General admission is $18; $16 for 65+, veterans and military; and free for members and children under 12. 5 West Stockbridge Road, Stockbridge, Massachusetts.
Brooklyn, New York
The Brooklyn Botanic Garden is a refuge in the go-go city
that is Brooklyn. Founded more than 100 years ago, it’s on 52 acres and has some 12,000 plants and 30 specialty gardens. You can forget you’re in the city. You can get your green therapy year-round. Highlights include an aquatic house and orchid collection, rock garden, rose garden and more. There is always something going on, be it flower-arranging classes, workshops on planning your spring garden, birding, drawing and watercolor classes, or tours of the Steinhardt Conservatory, where you can learn about plants from around the globe. Kids will love the Discovery Garden, an acre just for them to learn about plants and their habitats and the wildlife they might find there. The Japanese Hill-and-Pond Garden was created by landscape designer Takeo Shiota and was one of the first public gardens in America. You’ll find turtles, ducks and carp in the pond. Relax at the Yellow Magnolia Café or the Magnolia Canteen. If you want a quick bite, stop in the Coffee Bar.
Admission is $18 for adults; $12 for seniors 65 and older and students 12 and older with ID; and free for members and children under 12. Entrances are at 150 Eastern Parkway, 455 Flatbush Ave. and 990 Washington Ave., Brooklyn, New York.
A rose is a rose, and everything’s coming up roses at the James P. Kelleher Rose Garden. The garden dates back to 1931. Today there are more than 10 classes and 200 varieties of roses. Imagine seeing more than 1,500 roses in full bloom — they peak in June and again in late September. It’s a beauty indeed. The cherubs, statues, arched trellises and fountain add to the bucolic setting. The gardens are in Boston’s Back Bay Fens, which were once wetlands.
Free. The address is 73 Park Drive, Boston, Massachusetts.
Tannersville,
You can’t go wrong on a mountain top. Enjoy the views from on high where the air is fresh and the land vast with more than 175 acres of meadows, wetlands, forests and fields that blossom in all their glory in spring and summer. The Mountain Top Arboretum is a haven for nature lovers. The educational center offers an array of public events, exhibits, lec-
tures, workshops and more. Children will love using birch bark, moss, stones and whatever else they can find to build fairy houses, mini-gardens and forts for the Fairy Garden. This is also a great spot for birders, as more than 60 species visit during the year.
For something special, experience the spiral labyrinth and stroll inward to the circular stone bench. Kids won’t be able to resist the opportunity to race to the center and back. Walk the wetland boardwalk and absorb the beauty of spirea, asters, goldenrods and more. Another plus is the view across the wetland to the mountains. The gardens have been a go-to spot in the Catskills since opening in 1977.
Admission is free for members;a $5 donation is suggested for nonmembers. The address is 4 Maude Adams Road, Tannersville, New York.
Bronx, New York
New York doesn’t like to take a back seat to anyone about anything. That goes for gardens, too. The New York Botan-
ical Garden sits on 250 acres and has more than 1 million unique specimens. It bills itself as a museum of plants, a hub of education and a plant science laboratory. There’s so much to see and do that you should consider spending the day there. If you can’t, hit some highlights.
The Conifer Arboretum has some of the first trees planted in the garden in the early 1900s — more than 250 pines, spruces and firs. Walk in the Thain Family Forest along Native American hunting trails, and find the marks left by glaciers and trees that date back to the American Revolution. The rock garden is a rock star and has been called one of the world’s best gardens of its kind. It’s nearly three acres of alpine flowers snug in gravel beds and rocks. If all that walking stirs your appetite, try the Pine Tree Café, or if you’re in a celebratory mood, dine at the upscale Hudson Garden Grill.
Check the calendar for exhibits, workshops and events like the Orchid Show and the Holiday Train Show. The All-Garden Pass includes daytime access to the Enid A. Haupt Conservatory and Tram Tour, plus garden features including seasonal children’s pop-up programming and outdoor collections.
Pricing is $35 for adults; $31 for students with valid ID
and visitors 65+; $15 for children 2-12 years old; and free for patrons/members and children under 2. The address is 2900 Southern Blvd., Bronx, New York.
Wethersfield’s gardens are full of statues, like the limestone and marble ones from Greek and Roman mythology in the woodland garden nicknamed “The Wilderness.” Along more than 20 miles of trails you can find the unexpected, including an array of birds and vernal pools that are home to endangered amphibian creatures. The gardens are part of the 1,000-acre Wethersfield Estate, on the National Register of Historic Places. In addition to the gardens, check out the Carriage Museum, which has more than 20 antique carriages, and take a tour of the Colonial Revival Wethersfield House. The former site of two abandoned farms, the land that is Wethersfield Estate & Garden was purchased in 1937. Admission is $15 for nonmembers; $10 for 65+; and free for members and children under 12. 257 Pugsley Hill Road, Amenia, New York. n
Did you know that trees and plants need regular check-ups and preventative care to maintain their health and wellness, just like humans? While we wouldn’t skip an annual check-up or a doctor’s appointment when we’re sick, we often forget to care for our plants when they show signs of disease. Sometimes, we overlook the symptoms completely! But, what exactly is plant health care, and why is it so important? The Monster Tree Service team explains below.
Trees add beauty to your yard, benefiting your family and the environment. So, we should give them the care they deserve. Plant health care refers to holistic, preventative maintenance for your plants to keep your landscape healthy and prevent future complications. Rather than addressing problems like pest infestations after the creepy crawlies have taken over, plant health care services can help minimize the threat before it begins — saving time, money, and frustration.
Standard plant health care services include:
• Fertilization: to give trees the nutrients they need to grow and maintain their health.
• Insect and disease management: to address pest and disease issues that present a more serious threat.
• Managing soil health: the key to long-term success for thriving plants and trees.
Plant health care goes beyond just caring for a few trees. It is a comprehensive approach to maintaining your entire landscape. How often you need to check on the health of your plants depends on environmental conditions, yard size, and planting types. After an initial consultation, your plant health expert can recommend the best course of action for you and your yard.
Our trees and yards are an investment. They provide environmental benefits but also impact your property’s value. So, as with any investment, you should take the proper measures to maintain it. Unfortunately, many homeowners don’t call in a professional for plant health care
services until a disease or pest infection has already taken over their tree or yard.
Our professionals can identify invisible threats, and uncover tree health issues that go overlooked and address them before bigger problems arise. If you don’t catch issues like pests and diseases early, it can become more difficult to restore tree health. If a mature tree dies or becomes structurally unsound, you may have to pay for costly tree removal services to keep your property safe. Replacement saplings, meanwhile, will take years to grow into the big shady tree you once loved. Invest in regular plant health care to preserve your trees and your investment.
Even if your yard looks healthy, you should call in the experts for a free evaluation to assess your plants and trees and optimize the environment they need to thrive. And, for your comfortable outdoor enjoyment, Monster Tree Service offers mosquito and tick control as well. We look forward to serving you!
Enjoy
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In its original form, “rewilding” was a big idea. After millennia of human-caused degradation of large ecosystems, what could be done to restore natural balance? As advanced in the 1990s, rewilding was about “cores, corridors and carnivores” — restoring and protecting long-established habitats and passageways used by larger megafauna animals to migrate and traverse their traditional ranges.
The rewards can be big. Turning, for instance, pastureland or degraded brownfields back into forest has significant environmental benefits (aside from just helping the creatures). Planting trees, reintroducing native vegetation and encouraging large mammal habitation is a proven method for increasing carbon storage and reducing greenhouse gas emissions.
Rewilding has had some success, as in the example of restoring prairie grasslands and reintroducing the American bison in Montana, and bringing back the beaver in the U.K. and the muskox in the Arctic. But what about “rewilding” our own, much smaller habitats — our Albany-area yards?
Yards don’t have to be the chemically fed ecological deserts that achieved supremacy in the 1950s, with uniform green grass stretching to the neighbor’s property line. When nature is allowed to reassert itself, native plants and endangered pollinators reassert themselves, and the homeowner can opt out of the process that produces more than 35 million tons of yard waste annually. Rewilding your property need not be expensive, and older folks
on fixed incomes should consider that it will likely save money overall. Remember, the weekly mowing, the lawnmower maintenance and the chemical applications are going away. Even the water bill will go down, because native plants aren’t as thirsty as exotics. And it isn’t necessary to do it all at once — start with a few trial plantings this spring.
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Native plants support soil health, good water quality and biodiversity. And they can help fight off the invasive plants that are all around us.”
support soil health, good water quality and biodiversity. And they can help fight off the invasive plants that are all around us.” Some of the more problem plants around Albany, she said, are the multiflora rose and Japanese stiltgrass. The latter is often planted by homeowners who don’t realize it’s invasive, then spread on the hooves and fur of deer.
You can get ready by reading up on your local ecosystem (Albany is in the Agriculture Department’s zone 5B for plant hardiness) and identifying the bad-news invasive species you may be harboring — they’re still sold in many plant nurseries and big-box stores. The Cornell Cooperative Extension of Albany County might be a useful resource on invasives. And you’ll want to tell your neighbors your intentions, emphasizing that you plan a cultivated native plant garden, not a neglected bed of weeds.
Gabrielle Sant’Angelo Executive Director, Pine Hollow ArboretumAccording to Gabrielle Sant’Angelo, executive director of the Pine Hollow Arboretum in Slingerlands, “Native plants
Your local nursery should be helpful in pointing you toward the native plants it offers. Remember, since they’re native, they’re already adapted to Albany’s colder climate. The next steps are to set your mower height higher, mow less often, stop raking your leaves and repurpose your grass clippings (they make excellent mulch).
According to Laura Barry, a master gardener at the Cornell Cooperative Extension and chair of the native tree preservation committee for the town of Guilderland, New York, “Try to add one native thing every year, a plant, a shrub or a tree. A good goal is 70 percent native, 30 percent nonnative.”
It’s inevitable that there are wild spaces around you — wetlands, forests, hiking trails — that are under threat from development, defended by environmental and community groups that need both volunteers and financial support. Doing your part may mean writing letters or attending public hearings.
You can also go global by working with organizations like Yellowstone to Yukon (focused on wildlife corridors between the U.S. and Canada), Ecological Balance (which works in Cameroon) and Rewilding Europe (helping to bring back lynx, beavers, elk, white-tailed eagles, wolves and more).
Get out and enjoy nature. Most Americans spend 93 percent of their time inside, and getting outside at any age is good for your health. Take the grandkids, who will learn to appreciate nature at a young age. Your presence at parks and nature preserves supports these institutions financially and provides visual evidence of their popularity. A lifetime National Parks and Federal Recreational Lands Pass is only $80 for seniors 62 or over (or $20 a year).
According to Penny Sands at the Albany-based Green Thumb, seniors can earn extra money around New York through the Environmental Beautification program. The work is offered via state agencies, and tasks include planting flowers and mowing lawns, she said.
Now think of what kind of wildlife you’d like to attract. Hummingbirds (the ruby-throated is our only East Coast resident) will flock not only to colorful red plastic feeders, but to your bee balm, catmint and butterfly bush. Monarch butterflies, increasingly endangered, will be more likely to stop by on their epic migrations and lay their eggs if you have milkweed. Barry said that dill and parsley will bring in swallowtails. “And don’t cut the plants back in the fall, because the butterflies lay their eggs in them,” she said.
The creatures like to feel at home, so why not provide them with somewhere to nest? Bird feeders and birdbaths will create a through-the-window display that’s better than TV. Boxes are available (or can be built from plans) for specific birds, such as owls, which like to be at least 10 feet off the ground. Bats, which can devour 600 insects (including those pesky mosquitoes) in an hour, are far more beneficial than most people realize. And they like houses with tight quarters — like the space between a tree’s bark and its trunk. A small pond will be a haven for wildlife.
Again, you can start with small projects and specific corners of your property. And things will, in every sense, grow from there. n
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Van
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360 Whitehall Rd., Albany, NY 12208 | (518) 446-1920
Wilton
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Rent: 1 Bedroom $598—$723* | 2 Bedrooms $855*
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*Rents
Nearly 100 years have passed since the repeal of Prohibition, but the fingerprints of it endure all over the craft cocktail scene. The Berkshires region, where creative mixologists often update classic drinks invented during this influential era, is no exception.
According to cocktail expert David Guenette, retired bar manager at Number Ten, a steakhouse in Great Barrington, Massachusetts, it’s easy to tell the premium from the poseurs. First, look beyond sports bars, Irish pubs and dive bars to venues that prioritize the sip-and-savor mindset. Second, ask what type of vermouth they use (look for dry vermouth brands like Dolin or Lustau, and sweets like Cocchi Storico or Del Professore), and where they store it (hint: “in the fridge” is the right answer for a spirit that spoils quickly). Third, the staff should always use fresh citrus juice — not the stuff out of the lemon-shaped plastic squeeze bottle, and not sour mix.
Don’t be afraid to ask questions about ingredients and techniques. “As long as the bartender isn’t slammed, they should be open to answering your questions,” Guenette says. “If they’re not, it’s usually a red flag.”
Take the guesswork out of finding a great cocktail by heading to one of these Berkshire restaurants, bars or tasting rooms. Or you can make their recipes yourself. On the next two pages are a few recipes that you can try at home.
Located on North Street, Methuselah focuses on craft beers, organic and biodynamic wines and craft cocktails, in a funky, intimate lounge atmosphere. This recipe was crafted around Berkshire Mountain Distillers bourbon, plus the old-fashioned New England flavor of elderflower.
• 2 ounces Berkshire Mountain Distillers bourbon
• ½ ounce cinnamon simple syrup (see below)
• ½ ounce lemon
• ½ ounce elderflower liqueur (Methuselah uses Massachusetts-based St. Elder)
• 1 egg white
• Ground cinnamon
1 Place the egg white in a cocktail shaker. Add several cubes of ice and a whisk ball (if you have one). Cover and shake vigorously to froth.
2 Pour in the remaining ingredients, add another handful or two of ice cubes, cover and shake again.
3 Strain drink over a 7-ounce coupe glass. Sprinkle ground cinnamon on top of the froth.
Fill a glass Mason or other heat-resistant jar halfway with granulated sugar. Pour in an equal amount of boiling water and stir until the sugar is completely dissolved. Add six cinnamon sticks and allow to cool before using.
Tourists is a Berkshire-style reimagining of the roadside lodge, with an on-site cocktail lounge, The Airport Rooms, located next door in a renovated 1813 farmhouse.
According to The Airport Rooms’ Food & Beverage Director Irit Oren, “The star of this drink is the pineapple spirit made by Matchbook Distilling Co. in nearby Greenport, New York. Last fall, we led a foraging hike with their team, who will be launching a new spirit using ingredients we discovered around our nature campus.”
• 2 ounces Matchbook Ritual Sister Smoked Pineapple Spirit
• 1 ounce Lillet Blanc
• 1 bar spoon passion fruit syrup
• Sesame oil
• Fresh pineapple
1 Pour the pineapple spirit, Lillet Blanc and passion fruit syrup into a mixing glass, add ice and stir.
2 Strain into a chilled glass. Top with three drops of sesame oil and garnish with a torch-dried pineapple slice.
on pg. 39)
SHEFFIELD, MASSACHUSETTS
Established in 2007, artisanal maker Berkshire Mountain Distillers (BMD) has been at the forefront of the modern craft distiller movement. Last year, they opened a brand-new tasting pavilion at their Sheffield headquarters.
BMD has created a series of “cultural cocktails” that pay homage to some of the region’s most famous attractions. This modern spin on the classic Bee’s Knees was inspired by the Berkshire Botanical Garden.
• 1½ ounces Berkshire Mountain Distillers Greylock Gin
• ¾ ounce fresh lemon juice
• ½ ounce honey simple syrup (1:1 ratio of local honey to water)
• 1 ounce cava or sparkling wine
• Lemon twist
• Sage leaf
1 Pour the gin, lemon juice and honey syrup into a cocktail shaker, add ice and shake until well chilled.
2 Strain into a chilled stemware glass or coupe glass. Top with cava or sparkling wine. Garnish with the lemon twist and sage leaf.
BONDHU
NEW ASHFORD, MASSACHUSETTS
A newer entry on the Berkshire dining scene, Bondhu is a restaurant and culinary community space committed to bringing global perspectives to the region.
Their Bengali Gimlet is a twist on a traditional cocktail, using house-made simple syrup steeped with panch phoron, a Bengali mix of five spices (cumin, fenugreek, brown mustard seeds, fennel and nigella seeds). The cocktail is poured over a round red hibiscus ice cube, an homage to the Bangladeshi flag. Ben Grimes, Bondhu’s bartender, says, “The Bengali Gimlet represents our aspiration for an inclusive and diverse Berkshires community.”
• 2 ounces gin
• 1 ounce Bengali five-spice simple syrup
• ½ ounce lime juice
• Hibiscus tea ice cube, preferably sphere-shaped
1 Pour the ingredients in a cocktail shaker, add several ice cubes and shake.
2 Place a hibiscus ice cube in a rocks glass. Pour the cocktail over the top.
1. You can’t lose weight while eating carbs.
2. Carbs cause fat gain.
3. All carbs are created equal.
4. Carbs aren’t good for your health.
5. There’s too much sugar in carbs.
Minimally processed carbs rich in fiber like whole grains and legumes offer a blend of sustained energy and essential nutrients.
Balancing carb intake with protein and fats and total calories supports overall dietary harmony.
Your unique biology, activity level, preferences, and goals influence your carb intake for optimal well-being.
Minimally processed fibrous carbohydrates increase satiety and help maintain steady blood sugar levels and a healthy body composition.
Different sugar structures—as well as the food source they come from—can have an effect on your perceptions of texture and sweetness and enzymes in your mouth and digestive system.
A good general guideline is for carb intake to represent about 35 to 50 percent of your daily calories. (If you’re eating a 2,000-calorie diet, this translates to about 175-250 grams of carbs). The minimum recommended intake for fiber is 25 grams per day. The optimal amount is around 35 grams/day for women and 48 grams/day for men.
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The result of countless hours of work by dozens of volunteer photographers, writers and illustrators, recipe testers, translators and many more, Made Here is a
cookbook and a concept driven by New York’s community. Actually, Made Here is more than a cookbook, and it’s about more than just making food. It’s about making a home, mak-
ing a life, and making it in New York.
Produced by the nonprofit initiative Send Chinatown Love, the cookbook features the stories of New York’s Asian-owned momand-pop restaurants and shops — many of which were hit early and particularly hard by the COVID-19 pandemic.
Send Chinatown Love focuses on New
York City’s Chinatowns — in Manhattan, Brooklyn, Queens and elsewhere. It also features a section on small Asian- and immigrant-owned groceries, including a few in upstate New York, where you can find inspiration and purchase the ingredients for the recipes in the book. We’ve selected a few recipes here to get you started.
Shaking beef, or bò lúc lắc, is a classic Vietnamese dish. The name describes the cooking method employed, in which the chef must vigorously “shake” the beef in a sizzling hot pan or wok. This movement ensures that the cubes of beef take on an even sear while retaining their moisture, and helps to deglaze the pan, infusing the dish’s sauce with caramelized aromatics and other pan drippings. Preparing bò lúc lắc in a ripping hot wok imparts the dish with a distinct smoky flavor, thanks to the unique shape and even heat conduction of the wok’s design.
“It really makes a difference,” said John Truong, chef-owner of East Flushing’s Chef Papa.
Everyone makes it slightly differently, as all ingredients can be adjusted to a cook’s palate and personal preference. Truong has a soft spot for the bò lúc lắc he’s used to having in Vietnam, which is savory and utilizes a generous amount of fish sauce, whereas he has observed that American palates prefer a sweeter taste. At home, feel free to change the recipe to suit your own preference.
• 1 ½ pounds beef tenderloin (or other lean, well-marbled steak)
• 6 cloves garlic, minced
• 3 tablespoons oyster sauce
• 2 teaspoons sugar
• ½ teaspoon kosher salt
• ½ teaspoon black pepper
• 1 teaspoon fish sauce
• 1 tablespoon rice vinegar
• 2 tablespoons light soy sauce
• 1 tablespoon dark soy sauce (see NOTE 1)
• 1 tablespoon vegetable, canola or grapeseed oil
• 1 large red onion, thinly sliced
• 1 bell pepper, chopped (optional)
• 2 cups watercress
1 In a medium bowl, whisk together the minced garlic, oyster sauce, sugar, salt, black pepper, fish sauce, rice vinegar and soy sauces.
2 Pat the beef dry with paper towels and cut it into 3⁄4- to 1-inch cubes. Add to the bowl and toss to coat evenly.
3 Cover the bowl and marinate for 25 minutes at room temperature or up to 2 hours in the refrigerator. If refrigerated, bring the beef back to room temperature for 15 minutes (see NOTE 2).
4 Prepare a serving dish or individual bowls with a bed of watercress.
5 Heat the oil in a wok or large skillet over high heat until it just begins to smoke. Remove the beef cubes from the marinade and place in a single layer in the hot wok. Allow to cook undisturbed for 1 minute. Don’t overcrowd the wok; cook in batches if needed. Reserve the marinade for later use.
6 Grip the wok by the handle and use a spatula to toss the beef while you shake the wok back and forth. Shake every 30 seconds for 2 minutes.
7 Add the sliced red onion and bell pepper (if using). If you cooked the beef in batches, return the reserved cubes back to the wok. Reduce the heat to medium. Cook everything for an additional minute, tossing occasionally.
8 Add the reserved marinade to the wok and toss, then remove from the heat.
9 Transfer into the serving dish (or individual bowls). The residual heat will slightly wilt the bed of watercress beneath.
PREP TIME
10 MINUTES
MARINATE TIME
25 MINUTES TO 2 HOURS
COOK TIME
10 MINUTES
SERVING SIZE 4
NOTE 1
Soy sauce can contain wheat, but there are certified gluten-free versions of both light and dark soy sauce. Tamari can also be used here, although you won’t get the same balance of flavor that comes from a combination of both light and dark soy sauce.
NOTE 2
Adding the beef to the hot wok directly out of refrigeration will lower the wok’s temperature, preventing the meat from searing properly. Achieving a successful sear in a very hot wok is a crucial step in achieving this dish’s characteristic flavor.
PREP TIME
20 MINUTES
COOK TIME
25 MINUTES
SERVING SIZE 3-4
Thukpa is a noodle soup originating in Eastern Tibet, a staple in Tibetan and Nepalese households, typically containing wheat noodles and some medley of meat and vegetables. Thukpa is an archetypal word in Tibetan, referring to any soup or stew containing noodles. “Thukpa is found in various renditions across the Himalayas. It’s favored by Cafe Himalaya staff as well as the stream of ride-sharing drivers who stop by the restaurant,” said owner Karma Dolma.
• 1 ½ cups vegetable stock
• ½ cup fresh spinach
• 3 to 4 scallions, thinly sliced
• 1 small bunch cilantro, roughly chopped
• salt
1 Cook the noodles as directed on the packaging. Strain and run under cold water to stop the cooking process. Set aside.
NOTE 1
You can also include ½ lb. of cooked chicken or beef after step 3. If using raw meat, chop into ½-inch cubes or thin slices, salt generously and add to the hot pan before adding the onions in step 2, cooking it for a few minutes until the exterior starts to brown.
NOTE 2
This vegetable combination is just a suggestion. Feel free to use 2 to 3 cups of whatever vegetables you prefer (cabbage, peas, green beans, mushrooms, carrots, celery, tofu, etc.).
Cafe Himalaya’s rendition is a vegetarian-friendly version in comparison to the meat-heavy version commonly found in India and Nepal. “The reason why our menu is vegetarian-friendly is to show that [Himalayan] food can be very versatile,” noted Dolma. “In general, Tibetan food tends to be very meat-focused but we want to highlight vegetarian-friendly options to accommodate various lifestyles.”
Sautéed aromatics and crushed tomatoes are added for body, acidity and the sweetness they develop as they cook. Hearty vegetables that can stand up to simmering, like cabbage, carrots, mushrooms and green beans, are then added to the pot. Either fresh or dried noodles are fine to use here, depending on ingredient availability.
INGREDIENTS
• ½ pound dried or fresh wheat noodles
• 2 tablespoons vegetable, canola or grapeseed oil
• 1 small white onion, thinly sliced
• 4 cloves garlic, minced
• 1 small piece of ginger, minced
• 1 medium tomato, roughly chopped
• 1 medium carrot, julienned
• ½ small head green cabbage, roughly chopped
• ½ cup crimini mushrooms, thinly sliced
• 1 cup green beans, roughly chopped
2 Heat 2 tablespoons oil in a medium saucepan over medium-high heat. Add the sliced onions and sauté until translucent, about 3 to 4 minutes.
3 Add the garlic and ginger to the pan and season with a pinch of salt. Cook for 1 minute, then add the tomato (see NOTE 1).
4 Reduce heat to medium and add the carrot, cabbage, mushrooms and green beans (or vegetables of your choice per NOTE 2). Cook for 2 minutes, stirring occasionally.
5 Add the vegetable stock and bring the mixture to a rapid simmer. Season to taste with more salt and cook for 4 to 5 minutes.
6 Add the cooked noodles and spinach. The residual heat will slightly wilt the spinach. Ladle the soup into individual bowls. Garnish with sliced scallions and chopped cilantro.
Get the recipes for Lap Cheong Fried Rice and Kuro Goma Purin (Black Sesame Pudding) pictured on page 43 at 55pluslifemag.com.
Send Chinatown Love’s Gift-a-Meal program brings business back to Chinatown merchants while providing New York’s low-income community members with much-needed resources. With the Gift-a-Meal program, donations are used to purchase culturally sensitive hot meals, fresh groceries and supplies from small
Chinatown mom-and-pop shops still struggling to recover from the pandemic. Send Chinatown Love then partners with local nonprofits, food pantries and community organizations to distribute food and supplies to people in need. To learn more or make a donation, visit sendchinatownlove.com/gift-a-meal.
get the book!
Made Here:
Recipes & Reflections from NYC’s Asian Communities
Independently published by Send Chinatown Love $49.00 | 352 pages
In 2004, I took a deputy business editor job at the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel. Somehow, I managed to meet, across departments and cubicles, the then-art director, Lonnie. On paper, we didn’t have much in common. In real life, we were instant besties.
Across the years and, now, across the miles (866, to be exact), we’ve supported each other through caring for our parents, career changes, health challenges, and through the aisles of the Bloomingdale’s on Chicago’s Magnificent Mile. Thanks to Lonnie, I now own several cashmere sweaters that I wouldn’t have treated myself to otherwise.
We usually rendezvous at the Sheraton hotel that overlooks the Chicago River, settle into deep sofas with big cups of mocha, and define our current understandings of the meaning of life while the mist rises over the river, softening the glass-and-chrome skyline.
If a girlfriend is involved, a getaway is close behind. I’d like to claim that I have conclusive expertise in this travel specialty, but I admit that my research is open-ended. There’s always another girlfriend’s getaway on the calendar, with Lonnie or my cousins or even an adult daughter, occasionally.
Still, I’ve been around enough spas and tearooms to have a pretty good idea of what constitutes a great getaway with enough girlfriends to fill a short bus.
The essential components are convenience, comfort and a confluence of interests.
Convenience starts with choosing a venue that is equitably accessible for everyone so that meeting is the least adventuresome part of the trip. And once you are there, you want to be sure that the venue is easy for each member of the group to navigate. Resorts and city destinations work well for groups
that encompass a spectrum of abilities. While some people want to walk everywhere, others want the option to grab a cab if they need to zip ahead to the next point of interest or break away back to the hotel.
In winter, San Antonio is the perfect destination for a geographically scattered group. Choose a hotel that’s right on the famed River Walk, a shady loop around the city two stories below street level. There, you can pace yourselves through the seemingly endless choices of restaurants and shops that line the cool walkway.
Recently, I spent nearly a week in San Antonio (my “girlfriends” for this trip were my daughter and her three daughters, ages 9, 8 and 3). The Westin Riverwalk afforded a leisurely breakfast at water level as the sun sent pastel rays through the trees that arch the river. When we walked straight out onto the San Antonio River Walk from the hotel’s lower level, a left turn led to the Briscoe Western Art Museum and a right turn led to the landing where we could board one of the flat riverboats that circle the river.
Like Chicago in summer, San Antonio in spring offers the perfect combination of convenience and the second essential component: comfort.
A deeply welcoming “home base” can serve as a center of gravity to anchor a successful girlfriends getaway. It could be a rented house or apartment, a hotel with alcoves for lengthy conversations or a resort that supports a mix of shared and private rooms.
Small towns in New England often mix charm with convenience and comfort, perfectly scaled for a weekend get-together. Great
Barrington, Massachusetts, in the Berkshires; Concord, New Hampshire; and Rockport, Maine, each offer browse-worthy downtowns and restaurants that invite the depth of conversation that longtime friends crave. And with bed-and-breakfast inns adjacent to their historic downtowns, you can spend time talking and walking, not driving and striving.
Sit under the patio lights on the front lawn of the Prairie Whale in Great Barrington and work your way through its samplers of local wines. From the restored Victorian Centennial Hotel in Concord, it’s a short walk to the Granite State Candy Shoppe, where you can fuel your exploration of nearby Main Street with maple sugar. In this capital city’s eclectic downtown, you’ll find one of the galleries of the League of New Hampshire Craftsmen with hand-thrown pottery, photography and more.
Rockport, Maine, has a full spectrum of comfort, ranging from cozy bed-and-breakfasts to the oceanfront Samoset Resort, where you can center your getaway around your own cabin with views of the water from sunrise to sunset (and a kitchen for late-night popcorn). The Farnsworth Museum anchors downtown and merits a half day to explore its historic grounds and extensive collection of American art.
And that brings us to the last essential component of a girlfriends getaway: confluence. The best itineraries have something for everyone and a chance to explore together.
Destinations that offer an array of culture, history, soft adventure and affordable luxury hit all the right notes, says Barbara Golden, communications manager for the St. Augustine, Ponte Vedra and The Beaches Visitors and Conven-
SAN ANTONIO
River Walk
A 15.2-mile pedestrian path one level down from the street (210) 227-4262 thesanantonioriverwalk.com
Briscoe Western Art Museum Hosting art and artifacts reflecting American Western culture 210 W. Market St. • (210) 299-4499 briscoemuseum.org
NEW ENGLAND
Great Barrington, Massachusetts berkshires.org/plan-your-trip/theberkshires/great-barrington
The Prairie Whale Charming house with hip, rustic vibe
serving locally sourced American fare 178 Main St. • (413) 528-5050 prairiewhale.com
Concord, New Hampshire visitconcord-nh.com
The Centennial Hotel Redbrick hotel set in a turreted 1892 mansion with Victorian features 96 Pleasant St. • (603) 227-9000 thecentennialhotel.com
Granite State Candy Shoppe Family-owned confectionery that’s been a state tradition since 1927 13 Warren St. • (603) 225-2591 granitestatecandyshoppe.com
League of New Hampshire Craftsmen Concord site of multiple-gallery
organization dedicated to fine crafts 36 North Main St. • (603) 228-8171 nhcrafts.org
Rockport, Maine visitmaine.net/things-todo-rockport-maine
Samoset Resort Oceanfront destination set on 230 acres overlooking Penobscot Bay 220 Warrenton St. • (207) 594-2511 opalcollection.com/samoset
Farnsworth Museum
Hosting a nationally recognized collection of American art 16 Museum St. • (207) 596-6457 farnsworthmuseum.org
tion Bureau in Florida.
St. Augustine’s hip take on history positions girlfriends groups with the full spectrum of activities and relaxation. Conquistador-era fort? Check. Salt spa that pulls out the toxins lurking in your pores? Check. Guided moonlight kayak paddle through waters famously glowing with bioluminescence? Check. Early morning strolls along quiet streets lined with pastel cottages under Seussian palms? Check. Historic shopping plaza dotted with dining patios and shops that sell pottery and every type of hat you could imagine? Check, check and check.
Golden, who has organized a girlfriends getaway or two for her pals (an occupational hazard), says that her go-to strategy is dinner as entertainment. Scour tourism websites well in advance for food strolls that link restaurants for each course, from drinks to dessert. Another pro tip: Split the bill for accommodations in advance and decide together how you’ll pay for meals and services so you don’t harsh your mellow with accounting at the table.
The perfect getaway combines activities you all love with activities that are new to all of you. Shared new experiences build shared memories, and that’s what you’ll draw on when you are apart.
“The most important thing about a retreat with a group of people is how do you slow down time?” asks Kris Intress, who founded the Rock Springs Retreat Center in northern Tennessee, which structures women’s retreats throughout the year. “It’s a little like going back to camp when we were kids. We had these experiences of doing karaoke when nobody cared, and how do you create those intense moments that everyone remembers?” n
Create your own agenda during this empowering weekend with access to 17 talks, workshops, demos, and fitness classes. Enjoy a welcome reception with entertainment, gourmet luncheon, and fashion show at The Sagamore Resort on Lake George.
FLORIDA
St. Augustine, Ponte Vedra and The Beaches Visitors and Convention Bureau • (904) 829-1711 floridashistoriccoast.com
TENNESSEE
Rock Springs Retreat Center (615) 285-5735 • rockspringsrc.com
No worries! Here are some groups that will do all the work for you and your friends. Just pack your bags and enjoy.
• girlsguidetotheworld.com
• girlsvacationclub.com
• sisterhoodtravels.com
For tickets, $150, visit www.girlfriendsgetawaybolton.com or call the Bolton Landing Chamber of Commerce at (518) 644-3831
In an era when the aging population is growing, the need for specialized support and guidance for older adults and their families has never been more crucial. Enter the Aging Life Care Manager — a seasoned professional dedicated to navigating the complexities of aging and ensuring a higher quality of life for seniors. Let’s explore why hiring an Aging Life Care Manager is a wise decision for families facing the challenges of aging in the 21st century.
Aging is a multifaceted journey, often accompanied by a myriad of physical, emotional and logistical challenges. Aging Life Care Managers are skilled in conducting comprehensive assessments while considering the unique needs and preferences of each individual. This holistic approach enables them to craft personalized care plans
that address not only the immediate concerns but also the long-term well-being of the older adult.
The health care landscape can be daunting, especially for older adults dealing with multiple medical conditions. Aging Life Care Managers serve as knowledgeable navigators, helping families understand complex health care options, facilitating communication with health care providers, and ensuring that the individual receives the appropriate care and services.
Caring for an aging loved one can be emotionally challenging. An Aging Life Care Manager not only supports the older adult but also provides invaluable assistance and counseling for family members. Whether dealing with difficult decisions, adjusting to role changes or simply needing someone to share the emotional burden, the manager becomes a trusted ally throughout the journey.
One of the primary roles of an Aging Life Care Manager is to advocate for the best interests of the older adult. This involves coordinating various services, such as medical appointments, in-home care and legal and financial assistance. By streamlining these elements, the manager ensures a seamless and efficient support system for the aging individual.
While the initial thought of hiring a professional might seem like an added expense, the long-term benefits often outweigh the costs. Aging Life Care Managers are skilled in financial planning, helping families make informed decisions that are economically sound and sustainable in the long run.
Ultimately, the goal of an Aging Life Care Manager is to enhance the overall quality of life for the older adult. By fostering independence, providing appropriate care and promoting social engagement, these professionals contribute to a positive and fulfilling aging experience.
The decision to hire an Aging Life Care Manager is a strategic investment in the well-being of aging individuals and their families. With their expertise in holistic assessments, health care navigation, emotional support, advocacy, cost-effective planning and a commitment to enhancing quality of life, these professionals bring a wealth of benefits to those navigating the intricate path of aging. Choosing an Aging Life Care Manager is not just a practical decision, it’s a compassionate and forward-thinking approach to aging in the 21st century.
Herzog Law Firm provides Aging Life Care Management Services through Kym Hance, who has been guiding families through their longterm care journey for years. For more information, visit www.herzoglaw.com
One of the greatest pleasures of watching your adult children start families of their own is the thrill of becoming a grandparent. Having a grandchild can give us a renewed sense of energy, purpose, fulfillment and fascination. However, being a grandparent can also be hard work, sometimes frustrating, and fraught with new unsettled feelings, especially when there are other grandparents vying for the grandchildren’s time, attention and love. Though many of these feelings are perfectly normal, conflicts may occur, and having the tools to work through them is the key to resolving them.
When parents become grandparents, there is a natu-
ral shift in relationships, according to Matt Lundquist, a Brooklyn-based psychotherapist and founder-director of Tribeca Therapy. While a parent may have become accustomed to the parental role, the new dynamic as a grandparent is more of a “supporting role.” That alone can be an adjustment, but it can be compounded when there are other grandparents as part of the family unit.
There may be issues related to grandparenting style, with one set of grandparents being more indulgent and less disciplined than the other. Perhaps one set of grandparents likes to spoil the grandchildren with expensive gifts or trips, while the other prefers a less extravagant approach
to quality time together. There may be personality conflicts, where grandparents are simply averse to one another and their feelings are exacerbated by more time spent together. Or one grandparent may feel resentment that the other is able to spend more time with the grandkids, by virtue of living closer or having more time to devote to the relationships.
Communication — between the grandparents and parents, and perhaps among the grandparents themselves — is fundamental to resolving these types of issues, Lundquist stressed.
“Being direct, being upfront and addressing things sooner rather than later” is best, he said. “When there are conflicts, not talking about them makes them worse, because then things are unspoken and left to assumption.”
Families may not think of therapy as a first line of defense, but when conflicts seem insurmountable, family counseling may help — either in-person or virtual. During the height of the COVID-19 pandemic, remote videoconference therapy became the norm, Lundquist said. Today, it’s proving to be an invaluable tool for getting the whole family together for counseling, especially when the family unit is geographically scattered.
It’s important to think about family dynamics in terms of stages, according to Sarah Bren, Ph.D., a licensed clinical
psychologist and co-founder/clinical director of the Upshur Bren Psychology Group in Pelham, New York. There’s early childhood, adolescence, young adulthood, becoming a parent and ultimately, becoming a grandparent. As an individual is going through changes at each life’s phase, so too are the other members of the family, and everyone is trying to navigate these changes not only as individuals but in relation to one another. It’s not always a smooth transition.
Take, for example, hierarchical conflicts, whereby a grandparent wields financial power over the adult parents. “You may have one grandparent who is financially supporting the parents in the interest of having more access to the grandchild,” said Bren. “That can cause jealousy or competition with the other grandparents.”
When conflict arises among grandparents, it’s important to modify behaviors. “Think of how the family can work together to create more safety within the family system,” said Bren.
Establishing boundaries can help. “There are three kinds of boundaries,” she explained. “There’s an external boundary, where you ask someone directly to stop doing something or start doing something. It requires their cooperation and their willingness to respect that boundary.
“There are also internal boundaries, where you’re saying,
‘I’m not going to take in what you’re saying.’ You don’t need anyone’s cooperation or even to make the boundary known. It’s private, just for you. … Finally, there are physical boundaries, which is to create physical distance.”
Like parents who have different styles of parenting, grandparents will have different styles of grandparenting. “It’s OK for kids to have different types of relationships with different care providers and different attachment figures” as long as the behaviors aren’t destructive or dangerous, said Bren.
Bren suggested that grandparents should afford themselves and the other grandparents some grace, particularly when grandparenting isn’t precisely how you imagined it would be.
“ If I had this fantasy of what it would be like to be a grandparent … and it doesn’t look like that when it actually occurs, [I’m] going to feel grief.”— Sarah Bren, Ph.D. Founder of the Upshur Bren Psychology Group, Pelham, New York
“If I had this fantasy of what it would be like to be a grandparent — and the fantasy of the relationship I would have with my grandchild — and it doesn’t look like that when it actually occurs, [I’m] going to feel grief,” she said.
“It’s great to be able to focus on the parts of the experience that feel good, to feel gratitude for it. But just as I tell new parents, let’s not whitewash this experience into making you feel that it’s only supposed to be a happy experience,” she added. “When you have sad, angry or frustrated feelings, it’s like grieving the loss of a fantasy of what you thought being a grandparent might be like, and then you feel guilty.”
The best way to build intimacy and closeness with your grandchild — regardless of the child’s relationship with the other grandparents, who may be experiencing similar feelings — is to “be curious.”
“Maybe you thought that grandparenting would be baking cookies and reading stories to them all the time — that your grandchild would naturally be cuddly with you, but your grandchild doesn’t really like hugs or is sort of intimated by intense physical affection. Maybe they’re rambunctious and can’t sit still for two seconds so you can read a book to them. … Instead of trying to mold them into the kid we want them to be, express to them that you want to know what they’re interested in, and follow their lead,” she explained. “If you’re showing the child that you’re interested in learning about them, it really makes kids lean in. n
SATURDAY,
11
Come out to Saratoga Spa State Park for our Annual Spring Auto Show! All cars, trucks, and motorcycles are welcome.
THURSDAY, MAY 16 - SUNDAY, MAY 19
The sequel to the smash-hit “Menopause The Musical” is a hilarious and heartfelt look at the joys of menopause and friendship — plus hot flashes, mood swings, and memory lapses!
FRIDAY, MAY 10 - SUNDAY, MAY 12 @
Our 14th women’s retreat surrounded by the beauty and nature of Lake George and the Adirondack Mountains!
ALZHEIMER’S DISEASE, one of a collection of dementia-related conditions involving memory, thinking or behavior, affects more than 6 million Americans. Their loved ones — spouses, children, other family and friends — are often the caregivers, providing 18 billion hours of unpaid care in 2022 alone, according to the Alzheimer’s Association.
Being a caregiver can be emotionally, physically and financially draining. Still, when we talked to a few Albany-area caregivers, we found individual messages of hope. Yes, they spoke of the sacrifices, difficult decisions and losses, but they also expressed gratitude and offered reminders to take nothing for granted. Here are their stories, which we present in the hope that they can provide comfort, advice and companionship to the countless others who are going through something similar.
DAVE ANTOLOWITZ is a member of the so-called “sandwich generation” — caregivers who are caring for a parent while also raising children. When his mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease over a decade ago, he knew that he and his family would do whatever it took to help her through.
When it became clear in the fall of 2018 that his mother would need 24-hour care, Antolowitz and his wife moved their family into his mother’s home. It wasn’t an easy decision, nor was it a simple transition for his teenage daughter, who was still living at home. “All of a sudden we were all taking care of this person we knew and loved, but she was a little different,” he says.
This level of dedication does take a toll; he’s only 46 years old and sometimes regrets that he and his family aren’t able
to take family road trips or even go out to dinner like other families. On the other hand, he says caring for his mom has been incredibly rewarding.
“It might be one of the best things to happen to us, in a way, because we really value time,” he says. “It was a harsh reality that we don’t have as much time as we’d like, so let’s make sure we’re making the most of it.”
Ultimately, Antolowitz sees a beautiful sense of reciprocity in caring for his mom. “She gave everything she had to us; my brothers and I didn’t spend a minute in day care and she took care of us 24/7,” he says. “To be able to give that back to her is incredibly rewarding.”
CHERI AND CHRIS DAVIES’ Son, Aidan, was taking an AP psychology course in high school when he first suspected his dad might have Alzheimer’s disease. Cheri, a licensed clinical social worker, was quick to dismiss the notion. Chris was not yet 50 and far too young, she thought. But by the summer of 2018, Cheri was beginning to harbor some suspicions, so she decided to accompany Chris to his yearly physical. It was at that appointment that she realized something was wrong. Chris had confessed that there was a “creamer fairy” adding creamer to his coffee every morning and he was unable to perform some basic cognitive testing.
Over the next few months Chris, then 51, was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s and it was progressing rapidly.
“As a caregiver, I went from having a husband I could make plans with,” she says. “Those plans won’t get a chance to play out. I don’t have a partner anymore. I mean, I do — he’s physically there … but he can’t make any of the decisions anymore. I have to do everything on my own.”
That, Cheri says, might be one of the hardest aspects of her husband’s diagnosis. She’s grateful she can work in private practice and control her work schedule, but it only makes it marginally easier emotionally, she says.
“It took me a long time to wrap my head around, like, making a new will. It makes things very real,” she says. “I had to think about a lot of things that I thought we had time to consider together and now we don’t.”
Cheri credits Chris’ current level of functionality — which exceeds most expectations — to having an amazing circle of support, close friends and family who help keep him engaged and active. Most importantly, she’s thankful for the small moments she still has with Chris, and she urges other dementia caregivers to find whatever hope they can in those fleeting windows of clarity.
“Be present in the now. Even if it’s watching TV and laughing together, treasure those small moments,” she says, “because you’re going to miss those moments. There will be less and less of them.”
DEB LANE’S mother, Beatrice, was on a trip when she contracted a severe, antibiotic-resistant staph infection known as MRSA and went into sepsis, a life-threatening condition in which an infection triggers an extreme response throughout the body. Although she eventually recovered physically, she was one of the 3% of people who are left permanently cognitively disabled. Lane recounts, “She never had dementia or a slow decline. She went on her trip and she came back and she’s not my mom anymore.”
Lane got her mom involved in an adult day program and hired home aides to help when she couldn’t be there herself. But the aides were unreliable, Lane says. After about a year, Lane placed her mom in assisted living and later, into a nursing home, where she stayed for six years — but that didn’t mean Lane’s work was done.
“When [the person with dementia] is in assisted living or a nursing home, you’re still a caregiver,” she says. “A lot of people assumed it would make it so easy, but I was still doing a lot of work caring for her. You’re still very involved and advocating for them, especially in nursing homes that are so overloaded.”
through these stories. Despite their different circumstances, every caregiver expressed gratitude toward the Alzheimer’s Association, which serves the Capital Region through the Northeastern New York chapter.
“I was able to hook up with the Alzheimer’s Association right away and we set up a plan and I went to classes,” says Lane. “I can’t say enough about this organization. I don’t know what I would’ve done without them.”
Antolowitz was grateful for the association’s advice on how to keep his mother healthy and safe, as well as its help in finding estate-planning professionals. He also advises fellow caregivers to lean on the association to help manage their stress. “They have a hotline and they’re always available,” he says. “You will need to find balance and make sure you’re taking care of yourself. You can’t do that if you don’t have somebody to help.”
Davies says she relies on the Alzheimer’s Association to help her make sense of everything when she feels like she is “drinking from a fire hose” of information. It also has given her an outlet to be an advocate for other caregivers and enabled her to meet people going through similar struggles.
The Alzheimer’s Association website offers tips, advice, programs and resources. The association also may provide hands-on assistance, help construct a care plan, recommend medical providers and more. n
Alan Longshore guesses he’s walked about 7,000 miles in the last 23 years.
The 85-year-old Voorheesville resident has been a member of the Empire State Capital Volkssporters for that long and continues to meet with the group for their walks twice a week.
Before he joined the club, “I did quite a bit of walking,” Longshore says. “Probably for roughly 10 years before that. I had bypass surgery in my 50s, so I had always walked a lot and (joining a walking club) intensified it and gave it more purpose as well.”
The club is part of a national organization, the American Volkssport Association, whose mission is to “engage Americans in lifelong walking and other noncompetitive physical fitness activities.”
Volkssport, from the German word “Volksmarsch” (“people’s march”), was developed in Europe as a noncompetitive fitness-walking event in the 1960s. Since then, clubs and organizations across the world have instituted local versions of the movement. The Capital Region chapter alone has been active for 37 years, according to its current president, Chris Yost.
Yost, who has been a member for 10 years, says right now the club has about 200 members, who are mainly in their 50s and older. (The oldest members are in their 90s.)
“I have made a lot of friends through this club,” she says. “It’s funny. You join and then you immediately have 200 close, personal friends.”
• landscaped courtyard
• outdoor pool
• pickleball courts
• golf simulator
• gazebo
• fitness center
• bocce court
• fenced dog park
• on-site walking trail
“ I have made a lot of friends through this club. It’s funny. You join and then you immediately have 200 close, personal friends.” — Chris Yost
The physical and mental benefits of walking and exercise are well-documented. Those benefits are even greater for people of a certain age. According to Harvard Medical School, walking can ease joint pain, soothe arthritis and boost immunity, among many other rewards. “Several studies have found that … walking five to six miles a week can even prevent arthritis from forming in the first place,” the school reports. “Walking protects the joints — especially the knees and hips, which are most susceptible to osteoarthritis — by lubricating them and strengthening the muscles that support them.”
The Capital Region walking club offers walks for everybody at every fitness level. Yost says she pairs newcomers with walkers who match their pace so that no one feels rushed or bogged down. You can use maps provided by the organization and go on walks by yourself, or you can join them for their group walks, each of which includes a point of contact to guide the walkers along the routes. Walkers can choose between a 5K and a 10K route.
“We have people that walk at all speeds,” Yost says. “When you first come we try to make sure that if it’s your first walk you walk with somebody in the club, and if that person doesn’t like that person’s pace they can find someone else next time. We have people (who are) slow and fast and moderate.”
Friendship is a major motivator for the walkers.
“Food, fitness, friendship. Those are the three F’s,” Yost says. “And some clubs add a fourth F: fermented beverage.”
Debbie Hummel is a new member. At 62, she is newly retired and keen to enjoy her free time productively.
“I wanted to fill my time staying moving and doing more walking,” Hummel says. “It’s just nice to get to know somebody and just make friends like that. You get to know so many new people by talking as you walk.”
Everyone’s out for the same reason, Hummel adds. “They want to get their workout in.”
“There was one walk where we were walking along the Mohawk River. It was a winter day and it was windy and it was cold,” she says, laughing at the memory. “Somebody was asking, ‘Do we turn here or do we turn there? If we go down this street we’ll be protected from the wind.’ But nobody wanted to cut the distance. People want to get their full three miles or 5K in and don’t want to lose an inch. That’s their goal or purpose. For the health, aerobics, distance.”
Members each get a little passport-like book that’s stamped after each walk. At the national level, these stamps can span whole regions. One stamp challenge is the Appalachian Trail (hiked in sections across states). Another is a 50-states challenge (Yost just finished that one).Yet another is a lighthouse walk.
“We’re the region’s best-kept secret,” Yost says. “We like to think we’re seeing the world, one step at a time.” n
A yearlong membership for an individual is $12; for a family, it’s $20. To join a walk without becoming a member, it’s $4 for entry. See walkescv.org for membership forms and more information.
According to the website, a typical walk is 6.2 miles (10K) and lasts about two hours. The club also sponsors fiveto six-kilometer walks. Many walks take place on weekends and are designed to maximize the area’s scenic beauty.
The group also hosts four events per year for members, a strawberry fest, an Oktoberfest, a pizza party and a holiday party. Of course, each event also features a walk.
Ilove snacking.
Around 4 p.m., I’m a coffee-and-a-small-piece-of-chocolate kinda gal. Heck, even earlier I need what a friend calls “elevenses” — that mini meal between breakfast and lunch that I usually eat no earlier than 1 p.m. But I try to be mindful of my snacking, planning my overall calorie and carbohydrate consumption for the day.
As a certified health and wellness coach, I sometimes see clients who simply snack on anything they can get their hands on when the urge to nibble strikes. Often, it’s a sugary treat that provides a quick burst of energy, but only sets them up for an energy dip — so they head back to the treats.
I tell them it’s not always food they need. In fact, I describe three kinds of hunger: There’s belly hunger that triggers a grumbling tummy. Then there’s head and heart hunger. No amount of food will suffice because it’s solace rather than food we’re seeking. Our hearts may be empty because of loss, failure or simply boredom. Our heads may be craving something for the same reasons. So what to do?
Snack. But not on food. There are two other types of “snacks” gaining traction.
We’ve talked about exercise snacks before so let’s start there. Research shows that short bursts of activity, even one to two minutes, can help stave off the encroachment of ailments associated with aging. Dance, climb the stairs, do chair squats or anything else that gets your heart rate up. The goal is to incorporate seven exercise snacks into each day. At two minutes each, they provide about half of what’s recommended for overall fitness by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. The CDC recommends 150 minutes of moderate to vigorous exercise a week in addition to two days of weight training for optimal fitness. Fitting in those 150 minutes can be a challenge in our busy lives. But who can’t find two minutes a few times a day for short exercise snacks?
Start with one snack a day and as it becomes routine and “tasty.” Add another. Snack whenever you have two minutes. Not only will the movement aid your circulatory system, but it can also help boost your mood and immune system. Research shows that when we exercise or “move with inten-
BY BENITA ZAHN
tion,” as I like to say, we release endorphins, the so-called feel-good hormones.
As the Cleveland Clinic points out, endorphins help relieve pain and reduce stress along with boosting our mood. There’s no magic intensity. Just move with more purpose than you usually do when moving. As with all exercise, however, you should be able to speak. If not, you’re working too hard.
Exercise snacks are not the only snacks we can enjoy and employ to boost our physical and mental health. Joy snacks are another great choice when hunger strikes and we know our bellies are not empty. Simply put, this is about being mindful of the little things that make us smile. Perhaps it’s reading a book, talking with a friend, walking the dog. We often do these things on autopilot and miss out on the delight they bring. Granted, we’re not talking fireworks here, but as we snack on these little delights, our barometer for happy lifts.
While happiness has been studied, research on joy has taken a back seat. Joy and happiness are not the same. Joy is its own thing. Recent research by Philip Watkins, a psychologist who studies joy, gratitude and happiness at Eastern Washington University, has found that we experience joy when we feel connected or reunited with something or someone that’s really important to us.
His research also finds that feeling joy is strongly associated with subjective well-being, which is essential for us to flourish.
Keep in mind that we are experiencing a loneliness crisis, as described by the U.S. surgeon general last year (see related story on page 24). So what better way to fight loneliness than to start by exploring what brings us joy and, at the very least, start by snacking on it. If you haven’t had a taste for joy, this is the first step to reacquainting your body with the delight and fulfillment it can bring.
So, crank up the tunes, dance like nobody’s watching, giggle about what you’re doing, look out the window and find the shapes in the clouds, and when you’re ready, laugh out loud about all this. What a filling snack that will be. n
hatever your ambition, age or ability, the Empire State Trail offers numerous options for cycling at your own pace for fun, fitness, sightseeing and even education. Launched in 2017 by the State of New York, the Empire State Trail’s 750 miles traverse the state from east to west and north to south. Most of the 350-mile section from Buffalo to Albany, called the Erie Canalway Trail, is closed to motor vehicles, making it safe and enjoyable for bikers and hikers. Built on repurposed railroad beds and historic paths once used for the Erie and Champlain canals, the trail is generally flat and wide — perfect for cycling. Some parts are paved, while others have a stone dust or gravel surface. Historic sites along the way make for a multifaceted adventure, whether you are riding for a few hours or doing a longer tour.
In July 2021, I explored part of the Empire State Trail while visiting my sister. We rode from north Buffalo to Tonawanda on a section called the Shoreline Trail. As an avid recreational
cyclist, I found the smooth pavement, lack of elevation, great signage and zero cars to be cycling heaven. You can ride fast and furious (but mind the pedestrians!) or just tootle along, admiring glimpses of Canada across the wide, blue Niagara River. My sister, who is athletic but doesn’t ride bikes often, enjoyed it too. We got a good workout and stopped to take pictures and learn Erie Canal history at trailside kiosks.
This ride inspired my plan to achieve a personal goal: completing the entire Erie Canalway route from Buffalo to Albany. I plan to spread it over a week, riding roughly 60 miles a day. For an experienced cyclist, this is not difficult to do on flat terrain with good weather and all day to complete the miles. The challenge is training and logistics: lodging, food, transportation. While researching to plan my adventure, I discovered two cycling friends who have completed this journey in very different ways.
Nancy Roberts, whom I know from a women’s cycling club, rode from Buffalo to Albany in two separate trips during the COVID-19 pandemic with a self-supported group of four who bike-packed — carrying all their gear and camping along the way.
“My friends brought their dog Winnie, a very old and hysterically needy Chihuahua,” said Nancy. “She had her own ‘Winnie-bago’ that doubled as a trailer to help carry our gear. At age 62, I was the oldest, except for Winnie, though everyone was pretty close behind.”
Nancy’s group planned carefully, but part of a cycling adventure is never knowing what’s going to happen.
“I love riding my bike,” she said. “We are not only the fuel but the recipient of seeing the world via such an incredible little machine!”
She was impressed by the graciousness of locals along the way. On the first leg of their trip, they camped for free the entire way. They started at the Waterford Visitor Center and were allowed to leave their cars all week and camp along the canal.
“The ranger even gave us the key to the showers since they lock them at 5 p.m., as long as we did not leave before he got back to work in the morning. We found that sort of goodwill the whole way,” she said.
“Upstate New York is really quite beautiful and bike-friendly,” she added, calling Canajoharie “a gem of a town.” Nancy also loved the history along the old Erie Canal, seeing the lock system in action and realizing “what humans are capable of accomplishing when they have a common goal and work together.”
If you’re not a planner like Nancy but ambitious enough
for a multiday trip, try a guided tour. This is a more expensive option, but my friend Paula Burton discovered a fully supported ride offered by the nonprofit New York Parks & Trails. Every year they run a weeklong cycling trip from Buffalo to Albany as a fundraiser.
The Cycle the Erie Canal Tour includes meals, camping, a sag wagon (i.e., a car ride if you’re tired or have a mechanical issue), activities and more. “We stayed in a variety of parks and school grounds,” said Paula. “We even had dinner and breakfast in a zoo! Every night was different. Buses took us to historical sites and town centers. At every site, there might be a massage table, a beer tent, bands playing or a swimming pool. Showers were available in a big truck and there were plenty of charging and water stations.”
Mileage varied from 30 to 65 miles a day. Paula is 65 years old and an experienced mountain biker, but she had to be prepared to ride 40 to 60 miles every day for eight days. “Don’t be fooled,” she cautions. “Yes, it is mostly on some form of bike path, but many of the campsites were up hills and there were days on the road. Some of the canal trail is rough too, dirt or loose gravel.”
Paula advises training for any multiday trip. “I did a sixweek self-contained ride across Europe — but when I was 28, not 64!” she exclaimed. A friend had told her to ride at least two back-to-back days during training — for example,
Paula Burton, right, with Ruth Wheeler after finishing their guided cycling tour in Albany. At far right, a mural painted by local artist Dawn Jordan along the trail in Weedsport.
— Photos courtesy of Paula Burton
two 30-milers, then two 40s, then two 50s. “I worked up to 55 and was pretty sure I could do the eight days,” she said.
Every day of Paula’s guided bike tour was different and interesting. “There are actually four different canals and the history was fascinating,” she said. “We stopped at Lockport, where you can see an operating historical lock with authentic boats and get a ride on the boat. The hosts from the town wore clothes that you might see in 1860.”
If you’d like to explore the Empire State Trail one section at a time, distances on the Erie Canalway Trail range from 6 to 22 miles. Any bicycle is appropriate for paved sections. In more populated areas, you’ll also see people on in-line skates, the occasional skateboarder, plus runners, pedestrians and dog walkers. On gravel portions, a mountain bike or gravel bike (with wider tires and more tread than a road bike) will be most safe and comfortable. Motorized vehicles are prohibited, but pedal-assisted electric bikes are perfect for any part of this trail (restrictions may apply in certain areas for Class 3 e-bikes).
The Empire State Trail website offers everything you need to know for riding or planning a trip, including an interactive map with distances, estimated riding times, parking locations, trail surface conditions, lodging, sightseeing landmarks and more. n
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Home is supposed to be a sanctuary, a place to relax in ease and comfort. But for many of us, that sense of calm is disrupted by an all-too-common culprit: clutter.
Clutter can become particularly beastly in our later years, as we find ourselves surrounded by a lifetime’s worth of accumulated stuff that we — or those we love — will eventually have to tackle. And in the short term, the constant battle with everyday clutter can chip away at our quality of life — and cause us to waste a lot of time searching for misplaced items.
Jes Marcy’s company Clutter Boss has offered no-nonsense decluttering guidance since 2019. Being prone to clutter — or to the extreme form known as hoarding — is a “poorly understood, little-researched” phenomenon, she says. “Hoarding disorder used to be a sub-diagnosis under obsessive-compulsive disorder,” she explains, but a few years ago it became a separate diagnosis. Whereas hoarding has long been viewed through the lens of OCD, Marcy says, “most people we work with have shopping addiction.” Ultimately, she notes, “hoarding and excessive clutter are more about depression and anxiety than about OCD. It’s more like a feeling of ‘overwhelm’ that makes us feel frozen in place.
“In our business, we don’t use the word ‘hoarder,’ because when people hear that word they shut down,” Marcy notes.
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“But hoarding has had an evolutionary advantage for humans. When I think about clutter, I think resources. It’s literally built into our DNA to collect and save as much as we can.”
“Find the things that are easiest to decide about and remove them.”
What’s changed, Marcy says, is the world around us. So, “We have to unlearn everything we learned as children and rewire our DNA.”
Given that understanding, just how can we overcome our innate need to surround ourselves with stuff?
Marcy offers a seemingly simple, two-part approach: Stop the flow of stuff in, and speed the flow of stuff out.
Through her online decluttering “bootcamps” and popular Facebook groups, Marcy coaches clients as they take a break — “not forever” — from buying things. At the same time, folks are encouraged to begin “getting things out of the house on a regular, consistent basis.”
“Every day, fill one box and get rid of it,” she suggests. “Work on one specific 15-minute project, like a junk drawer” for starters. “It’s anti-Marie Kondo, but instead of finding things you’re not emotionally attached to, find the things that are easiest to decide about and remove them. You need to create a space you can breathe in.”
The process can be “physically and mentally laborious” and can take anywhere from six to 18 months or more, Marcy explains. “It’s like weight loss. You spent decades accumulating clutter, so you can’t expect to declutter overnight.”
Joy Rafferty has been helping people conquer clutter through her Latham-based California Closets franchise for more than 20 years. Her full-service business designs, manufactures and installs storage solutions — not just closets! — for every room in the house.
“During the past few years, people have been looking differently at their homes, wanting them to be a sanctuary,” says Rafferty. “At the same time, many people, particularly older, more mature clients, find themselves dealing with a lot of things they’ve collected over the years and that they love.”
Holding onto those treasured items becomes especially problematic when people downsize to a smaller home. “They’re really worried that their stuff’s not going to fit,” she says — a concern they might not have had when they lived in their larger home. “Through our consultations and custom design and manufacture of storage systems, we help them make the most of every inch of the space they have.”
Taking a hard look at optimizing the use of your available space may require you to adjust your thinking, Rafferty suggests. But once you experience the sensation of order, she says, it gets easier to stay organized. “If there’s a space for everything, it’s easier to put things where they belong.” n
— Jes Marcy Owner, Clutter Boss
q When clearing a closet or drawer, take EVERYTHING out, and only put back what’s important to you.
q Feeling overwhelmed and don’t know where to start? Tackle even a tiny section of the closet, or a single drawer.
q Build on your sense of accomplishment (“I just dealt with those drawers!”). Take what seems like an insurmountable task and break it into manageable pieces.
q Take before and after photos to document your decluttering successes.
q Join an online decluttering community and find a (nonjudgmental) “clutter buddy” to inspire you and hold you accountable.
q When evaluating a belonging, ask whether it falls into the C.U.T.E. category: Can’t Use This Ever.
q Remember the adage “Don’t let a drop zone become a stay zone.”
The other evening I was listening to my streaming playlist and having a great time when a familiar electric piano riff by The Guess Who started playing. I went from happy to sad in an instant. I always liked Burton Cummings and Randy Bachman, and “These Eyes,” written in 1968 about the loss of a lover never to return, was a great song. The words, “These eyes cry every night for you … these arms long to hold you again,” got me thinking about the beauty in my life and how I’d feel if I lost it.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but I do love dark brown hair and blue eyes. That is one reason why I married Phyllis. I met her in typing class and we were married five years later. When these eyes met hers, I fell in love. To me, she is beautiful and perfect.
If we don’t want to end up like Burton Cummings singing the song of lost love we must be prepared to repair a damaged relationship. Building a happy, healthy partnership takes work. Leaving issues unaddressed is the fastest way to trouble. We must take full responsibility if we are at fault. Keep the romance alive. Go out to dinner
or just spend some intimate time together. Talk, talk and talk some more — and please laugh! I mean really laugh. Hold hands, hug, kiss and snuggle. We took dance lessons and, man, it worked. I am not Burton Cummings singing about a lost love. I am on the other side of the record, appreciating a love that has remained — and grown.
So look into each other’s eyes and hearts and make it last forever. Just so you know, I will not be listening to this song for a long, long time, believe me. I think I will hit the skip button next time and listen to the Doobie Brothers instead. n
