WINTER ISSUE
JULY 2018
R55.00
multiple
ARE YOUR TWINS READY FOR
s n o s a se
solids?
MY STORY
- Raising conscious kids in canada - Jappie (Jabier) family ROOTS
Tips FOR READING TO toddlers
TODDLER SEMINAR JUNE
Tips for travelling with multiples
Why Choose
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Contents MY STORY
4 5 6
Memory Box Tips for reading to Toddlers
Raising Toddlers Seminar
16
Raising conscious kids in an unconscious world
18 20
Travelling with my two...
Story of the twin roots of the Jappie (Jabier) family
4
16
9 14 23
Cover stars : Annabelle and Andre Johannes van der Merwe Photographer: Corinna Tannian Annabelle and Andre were born at Wilgeheuwel Life Hospital weighing 2,5kg and 2,6kg respectively They were about 4 weeks old in the photo. Photographer Corinna Tannian specialises in newborn, maternity and family photography. She has an award of excellence for her maternity work and is a recognised newborn photographer in South Africa as well as the USA. Corinna, based in Randburg is mom to two children aged 10 & 11 years. She has photographed 5 sets of twins to date. www.corinnatannian.co.za
Are your twins ready for Solids?
Every twin is different Rules for your babysitter
18
2 3 4 10 11
21
From the Editor Fabulous Finds Recommended Books In the News
What’s Happening in your city
12 15 21 24
Multiple Moments
Facebook Chat Recipe - Koeksusters Classifieds multiple seasons
1 Winter 2018
welcome Editor Marion Smith Based In Johannesburg Telephone 072 049 7891 Postal Address P. o. Box 28765 Kensington 2101 Information and enquiries marionsmith@telkomsa.net Printers BOKSBURG PRINTERS Design and layout MARIANA ENGELBRECHT Mindfield Design info@mindfield.co.za
From the Editor Raising multiples is definately more than child’s play. It takes table spoons of patience and love but as the cliché goes, it’s double the love and double the reward.
Parents seminars twice a year in Johannesburg, Facebook and this magazine are the ideal way to get some help with those sometimes sticky issues in parenthood.
So aside from the norm of broken or rather lack of sleep and mastering the art or feeding two or three and bathing, dressing and just generally trying to keep a happy environment, every day is filled with fun and an abundance of love and appreciation for your special gifts.
In this issue we look at the topic of weaning your toddler with some suggestions on making the transition easier. The Raising Toddlers Seminar that was recently held at The Radisson Blu Hotel in Sandton was a success as always with a full house on the day and some keynote speakers attending who shared a wealth of knowledge.
Of course life isn’t a bed of roses and that is were the wonderful support of our fellow parents comes in so that we can get advice and support and some times just let off steam. Facebook has become a fantastic platform and our group is growing at a phenomenal pace. Although not the spot to ask for medical advice it is always good to know at 3pm you can go online and there is almost a 100% guarantee there is another mom in South Africa also awake wilfully wishing her babies to sleep. The combination of our Expectant
We have a mom share her experience about travelling with her twins both locally and overseas and how best to prepare for these trips to make it a little easier for the family. There are so many family resorts geared towards large families these days and airlines that cater to our needs that with some good planning large families can now travel with a lot less stress. A story of great interest to me personally is the historic based story, combining the
koeksuster recipe. As a frequent traveller who loves interesting cultural stories I could have sat and listened to Faieza for hours as she told me all about her family history and the twins. Life goes by so quickly that sometimes we forget to stop and think about the origin of the food we eat and the great stories that come with it. Winter has been short this year ending off with a brilliant display of the blood moon on the 27 July. Spring is just around the corner and we can all go out and start preparing for the hot summer holidays. I hope you enjoy this edition of Multiple Seasons, and remember we learn from our experiences of raising our children as much as they are learning each day so get involved 110% and cherish every moment .
Multiple regards
Marion
Disclaimer: Published and owned 100% by Marion Smith. No part of Multiple Seasons magazine may be reproduced without the written consent of the publisher. The publisher accepts no liability of any nature arising out of, or in connection with, the contents of this magazine.
Winter 2018
2 multiple seasons
fabulous finds
Pigeon Nipple Care Cream
Made from 100% ultra-pure Lanolin, completely natural and Hypoallergenic. It is also color and fragrance-free and no additives. Safe for both mom and baby, no need to wipe or rinse before baby directly latches on you.
PRICE:
R169.99
Its moisture helps to heal, soothe and protect dry, cracked skin due to continuous pulling and sucking of baby to mom’s breast while breastfeeding. This can also be used if you pump, to avoid dryness of the nipples. 50g tube found at all major baby retail outlets.
Neckerbibs Twin pack from Kids Emporium
Baby Bugs Twin feeding pillow
PRICE:
R356
per pack
• Super absorbent - 3 layers • Hygienic, Reversible • Twin Pack - One stylish grey & white stripes print with a marl grey reverse, one cute panda pals print with a grey reverse • One size with two adjustable poppers • Suitable from birth
from Kids Emporium
ALL fabrics are 100% COTTON
PRICE:
R950
Buy online at www.kidsemporiumonline.co.za
Plush Baby Chair from 4aKid
PRICE: from
R249
Plush Baby Chair is used for upright sitting position once baby can support their own head. It helps your little one to stabilize their back while they learn to sit. This chair wraps itself around the baby making it impossible for baby to fall forward. It has an anti-slip design making it is safer and more secure. Available in different colour schemes.
Tel: 011 656 8290 www.4akid.co.za
multiple seasons
3 Winter 2018
books
TOP TEN BOOKS FOR
toddlers
•
The very hungry caterpillar - Eric Carle
•
We’re going on a bear hunt - Michael Rosen and Helen Oxenbury
•
Freight Train - Donald Crews
•
The nappy House - Audrey Wood
•
The happy egg - Ruth Krauss
•
Where’s my teddy - Jez Alborough
•
Counting Kisses - Karen Katz
•
Sleep in a Jeep - Nancy E. Shaw
•
Green eggs and Ham - Dr Seuss
Memory Box You cant keep your little ones from growing up too fast , but keeping a box filled with their birthday mementos, school awards and so much more helps you to at least capture a moment in time. A wooden box ideally with their names on it is a good way to keep track of your twins’ and triplets’ most important memories. The list is endless, but can be specific to you - but here are a few suggestions from other multiple moms:
AFRICAN CHILDREN’S BOOKS BY
africans
•
Chicken in the Kitchen - Nnedi Okorafor
•
The mystery door - Deogratias Simba
•
Azizi and the little blue bird - Laila Koubaa
•
Sosu’s Call - Meshack Asare
•
How the leopard got his claws - China Achebe
•
Treeland. the land of laugher - Mama Mwijarubi
•
Ays - Marguerite Abouet
•
Akata Witch - Nnedi Okorafor
•
Chike and the river - Chinua Achebe
First vest Booties One small nappy (prem nappy) Personalised bib Front page of the The Star newspaper on the day of their birth Report cards Hospital tags lock of hair First teddy Random photos Frist Christmas photo Tooth fairy box
Going home outfit Foot and hand impressions First dummy Hospital gown Baby album Art work made at school Medals and trophies won Notes written to mom and dad USB with video clips on Bank card with savings in it for their 21st First Bible First flight tickets
It is recommend to give these boxes to your children when they reach 18 years but having a teenager in the house I would prefer 21 as I now see a lot of it would not be appreciated. Imagine the look on their faces opening this box at their 21st.
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4 multiple seasons
books
Tips FOR READING TO toddlers
Reading can be very challenging sometimes especially when its toddlers. They don’t sit still and seem to squirm and wriggle every where. If they are acting out the story then it s perfectly normal and you know that you are doing a great job, because they are listening. Reading from birth or even when they are in the womb will set a life time of love and appreciation for books. It increases our general knowledge, whisks us off in to far aways lands and lets us dream about life styles and adventures we all aspire to have. Some moms even get their childminders to read in their African language in the hopes of getting the children to learn it. Some will pick up some words others will just love the unusual sounds and even the clicks that appear randomly in the sentences. HERE ARE SOME TIPS ON READING:
READ SLOWLY: Its not a race, don’t rush through the book. Discuss the pictures
and the story but
not finish the book, line. Ask questions about the story and the child’s opinion. You may well spent. remember, less is more. If they engaged in half the book is was time
AGE APPROPRIATE: Select books that are suitable for the age of the child. Be it lift and flap, touch and feel, hero stories or sound books. Sometimes you have to create the story from the pictures and get the child involved to help. They cant read the words so it actually doesn’t matter. The day will come when you can read the actual story to them. KEEP IT ENGAGING: Dont read in a monotone voice. Let you voice rise and fall with the story line. Clap your hands if needed, use movements to exaggerate the story, use facial expressions, basically become the story. Let them lie on your lap or act it out. KEEP THE BOOKS ACCESSIBLE: Place the books on a bookshelf or a shelf that is the height of the children. They should be able to pull out a book any time and browse through it. Teach them to pack the books neatly back into the bookshelf when they are finished.
LET THEM CHOOSE THE BOOKS: They will have their favourite books and more times than not ask you to read it over and over. Dont ever tire of that. Ownership of a favourite books assists with independent reading further down the line or chew and tare the pages. Explain how to s from trees and how long it will take for a tree every page is made from paper and paper come r. corne hand right top the from how to turn the pages grow to produce the pulp needed . Teach them
RESPECT BOOKS: Dont let them draw in the books
SET UP SCENES: Some days you can set up a scene and act out the story with the use of their toys. The can dress up as the characters and let them choose the extras. Remember to put the toddler in charge of the story. SHOW THE WORDS: when you are reading run your finger along the words so that your child can start to recognise the formation of the letters.
MAKE IT PERSONAL: Change character names to that of the children and your family and pets and even your local grocery store and car etc. This way they will learn about the people and things of importance in their daily lives.
HAVE FUN!!! Every day is an adventure with your toddler, we want to maximise the joy of learning to read books and nurture a life long love for them.
multiple seasons
5 Winter 2018
seminar
RAISING TODDLERS SEMINAR JUNE 2018 Una spoke about sleep tips for toddlers, a stage of development that many parents still struggle with.
The fifth Raising Toddlers seminar was held on the 23 June 2018 at the Radisson Blu Hotel in Sandton. It was hosted by Marion Smith, owner of Aupairs Exclusive and Una Van Staaden, owner of Pikanini Baby Academy. As always we had a fantastic turn out on the day.
We had numerous exhibitors who displayed and sold their their products as well as donated wonderful prizes towards our raffle . A regular exhibitor at our seminar was Urban Babies who sells toys online, we also had Kids Emporium from Bryanston.
Be Safe gave some much needed advice on car seat safety and how to select the correct car seat when shopping, its always shocking to realise how uniformed we are when it comes to selecting an item of such critical importance to our children’s well being.
Winter 2018
6 multiple seasons
Our speakers included the ever entraining and knowledgeable Derek Jackson who spoke about discipline. Paul Bushell focused on bullying and emotional intelligence. A psychologist who has also written a book he had a lot of useful information to share.
GRAVITY JUMP
seminar
Lisa Raleigh, well known celebrity and mom of a toddler spoke about a fit and healthy lifestyle for both parents and toddlers, she also gave a brief demonstration on how to best utilise her rebound equipment.
There was a scrumptious array of smoothies, croissants, muffins, nuts and pastries. The Radisson always does an outstanding job on the food and drinks. I can honestly say we over eat every time we host a function here.
Thank you to all of our sponsors, it is always much appreciated and adds to extra excitement to the day. The seminar would not be possible without all of their support
The beautiful goody bags where supplied by Mustela and filled with all sorts of goodies from companies and many of them also sponsored prizes. A special mention goes to Play- Doh who gave each delegate a toy valued at over R280. One lucky couple won a weekend at The Radisson hotel with their twins in the business class room, a definite spoil. Another lucky mom won the Lisa Raleigh rebound kit valued at R6000.
TopTots who supports us every year with their brightly coloured clown, Rapid Studios who showcased their various ideas for photo books and canvas’s and Born Fabulous with their car seats and prams ideal for the toddler market. Thank you to Tammy Holliday who did all the photography on the day.
We look forward to hosting the next seminar in June 2019 at the Radisson hotel again. multiple seasons
7 Winter 2018
Perfect to make Feeding & Weaning easy right from the start!
New Generation
Fits all bottle sizes. Night Lamp Function Milk Bottle Ladle for easy retrieval of bottles. Instantly heats up breastmilk, baby’s milk & food to desired temperature without destroying nutrients.
Autumn 2017
multiple seasons 8 www.sp-africa.com
Pigeon South Africa
@Pigeon_SA
@Pigeon_SA
weaning
ARE YOUR TWINS READY FOR
solids? Weaning is the process of moving your babies from milk onto solid foods. The first stages of weaning helps to lay the foundation for healthy eating habits, and teaches your baby how to start eating using utensils, swallow and eventually chew. The world Health organisation recommends starting at 6 months , however many parents start any time from 4 month onwards. If your babies were prem you will need to take this into consideration also.
Common Mistakes • Chewing her fists • Waking in the night when she used to sleep through • Wanting extra milk feeds These are just things that growing babies do and it does not mean that they are ready to progress to solid foods yet.
Essential Weaning Equipment • A few colourful baby feeding spoons and plastic bowls (Pigeon has a fantastic range)
Signs to look for that they are ready to be weaned:
• Bibs and clean cloths
• Can hold her head up, must be able to maintain a steady, upright position to take her first food.
• A hand blender or a food processor
• Sits well when supported. Might sit on your lap at first but later will sit in a high chair • Makes chewing motions and could even have tooth or two. The gag reflex has gone. • Has had a healthy weight gain , basically has doubled their birth weight • Shows an interest in the food that you eat • Has good co ordination, she can put the food into her mouth by herself
• Saucepans and / or a steamer • Ice - Cube trays or small containers • Free flow breakers
How to start Weaning You must start with rice cereal. Normally offered in the morning and mixed with the milk that the baby is currently drinking so be it breast milk or formula. It must be runny so that they can become accustomed to the texture. Normally its 1T to 4.5T of warm milk but read the instructions on the box You would introduce veggies first , start with a single savoury veggie. Try to avoid sweeter ones.
They will eat one veggie only for three days, then after 3 days introduce the next one and so it goes on. After about two to three weeks start introducing fruits As they get a bit older you can make stews and blend them in the blender as they learn about textures. Cook the veggies with no salt and freeze them in ice cube trays, these are the perfect portion sizes and the healthiest and most cost effective ways. The same can be done with the stews but store them in small containers. Now the babies will drink cooled boiled water or rooibos tea with no milk or sugar as milk was a meal so cannot be seen as drink during the day now. Diluted purity juice is also an option.
Milk Still Matters When you start weaning, milk reminds the main source of nutrition for your babies, if they are between 6 and 12 months, stick to your pre - weaning routine, and your babies will drop a feed when they are ready. As a general guide, bottle fed babies need around 500 - 600ml of milk a day. If you’re breast feeding , feed on demand, as well as offering food.
REMEMBER Keep it fun !! if you are happy your baby is happy. It can take 8 - 10 tries for your baby to like a new flavour.
By marION SMITH multiple seasons
9 Winter 2018
in the news
ANONYMOUS DONOR GIVES PRETORIA TWINS THEIR HEARING By Michelle Nortje, 11 July 2018 YOU
involve such an expensive operation and medical aids don’t fully cover it, they haven’t been able to have the surgery before now.
Melissa and Shanice Lewis, 21-year-old twins from Pretoria, who received cochlear implants on 15 June are showing good reactions to environmental sounds. “It’s going well and I’m positive about their progress,” Gary Lewis, the twins’ dad told YOU.
“A cochlear implant refers to electronic hearing stimulation. The implanted electrodes in the inner ear bypass the damaged hair cells and stimulate the [acoustic] nerves directly – the brain receives the message of sound electronically,” explains Erika Basson, manager of the Foundation for Children with Hearing Loss in Southern Africa.
Expensive operation “It’s a lengthy process. They won’t have 100% hearing within just one day but I’m excited about their progress.”
Anonymous donor “We received a large sum of money from an anonymous donor and the medical aid also covered a portion of the operation,” says the twins’ mother, Brende Lewis.
The twins were born deaf and got their first hearing aids at the age of two. But over recent years their hearing loss became too profound and they were found to be good candidates for cochlear implants. Unfortunately because the implants
Brende and Gary are divorced and Shanice lives with her mom in Cape Town, while Melissa lives with her boyfriend, Duane, and his parents in Swakopmund, Namibia. Duane is also deaf. Shanice also has problems with her sight
and because she relies on sign language to communicate, she stays at home. “She has a tutor who helps her with speech therapy, spelling, reading, writing... all the necessary developmental exercises she has to do on a daily basis,” Basson says. Melissa also uses sign language but is able to speak a few words. “She speaks a few words every now and again and she recently started doing administrative work,” Basson says. Fantastic reaction The twins are already progressing well, even though they’ve only had the implants for less than a month, says Dr Catherine van Dijk, head of the cochlear implantation division of the Ear Institute in Pretoria. “Both show fantastic reaction to environmental sounds and we’re looking forward to them reaching their full hearing potential,” Dr Van Dijk says.
Uitenhage swimming twins Alaric and Alard Basson
SWIM TWINS AIM FOR EXPLOSIVE DISPLAYS Friday, 02 December Outshoorn Courant NATIONAL NEWS - Uitenhage swimming twins Alaric and Alard Basson are preparing for a week of explosive performances when they compete for South Africa in the World Short Course Championships in Canada next week. Taking place in Windsor, Ontario, the 13th Fina short course championships
Winter 2018
10 multiple seasons
will see the 20-year-old Nedbank NMMU Swimming Club stars test themselves against the world’s elite from December 6 to 11. Alaric is preparing for a week of intense competition as he tries to make his mark in the 200m breaststroke and the 100m individual medley (IM). “There is a big difference in short course racing in a 25m pool. It is far more
explosive than events in an Olympic size pool which is 50m long,” said Alaric. “For example, you will pace yourself in the 200m long course event but in the shorter pool it’s basically a sprint all the way. That makes it a lot tougher and much more intense.” In this year’s national short course gala Alaric won the bronze medal in the 200m breaststroke and silver in the 100m IM.
what’s happening in your city
KZN
GAUTENG
Mitchell Park Zoo
Kids World
With a host of small animals and birds for the entire family to visit. There is a sand filled play ground that allows small children to enjoy playing on jungle gyms, swings, slides and other equipment. While the kids play mom can relax and enjoy tea or coffee and a meal at the Blue Zoo tea garden nestled amongst the trees and attractive flower beds.
This is a world full of fun for the entire family! from gladiator inflatable to jumping castles , boat rides, kids rides, quad bikes, go karting and paint balling, there’s something to keep everyone entertained. Weekend entertainment includes a flea market.
Where: Musgrave, Durban Hours: Monday - Sunday 8h00 - 16h00
THE CAPE
The Foodbarn This is an excellent restaurant that caters for both children and parents. The restaurant boasts a fantastic kid’s menu as well as a play area that will keep the children entertained while parents enjoy the delectable meals.
Info: (031) 303 - 2275
Where: Ridgeway, Johannesburg South Hours: Saturday, Sunday and public holidays 8h00 - 17h00 Info: (066) 129 - 1610 www.kidsworldjhb.co.za
Where: Noordhoek Farm Village 270 Main Road, Noordhoek Hours: Lunch: Sun - Mon 12h00 - 14h30 Dinner: Tues - Sat 07h00 - 21h30 Info: (021) 789 - 1390 www.thefoodbarn.co.za multiple seasons
11 Autumn 2017
multiple moments Faith & Hannah Lambrechts - 7 months old
Left Juanita and Right Elizna 2 years 6 months with baby ChanĂŠ 11 days
old
Simon & Lucas Mekel at 1 year old
Evan, Lila and Zoey de Wet - 10 week
s
Logan Gouws and right is Xavier Gouws at 8 weeks
Zach and Kirsten Francis age 5.5yrs 16 month old twins, Olivia and James Graham
Winter 2018
12 multiple seasons
Thanks to the mums who shared their beautiful photos with us! These earlier childhood photographs are always very special.
multiple moments
Zotos Triplets will be 6 Months on 1st of August
Evan, AmorĂŠ and Dwayne Erlank 4 Months old
Rohan and Lillith Harris 5 months old
Isabella and Gabriella Johannes aged
Luke and Matthew Batista turning
8 with their 22 month old sister
7 in September Megan and Katelyn Almost 6 mont
hs
nder was 6 months old on the 18th
Triplets Christian, Isabelle and Alexa
oud Francois en Marilet Marais 12 weke
gebore 23 April 2018
multiple seasons
of July
13 Winter 2018
raising kids We are often surprised when children from the same parents, the same home, born on the same day, plugging into the same system, are so emotionally different. They think, feel and act differently in the same situations. They show love differently, and respond to discipline differently. Take that shocked look off your face – there are all sorts of factors that make our children emotionally different, including our twins.
#raisingkids To Thrive in a Constantly Changing World
Every twin is different
Emotional Intelligence is hard to measure, but is definitely something that we can keep growing and nurturing in our children. Start by understanding the unique Emotional Intelligence strengths and weaknesses of each of your children, and then build up from there. The best way of doing this is by spending real time with your children. Get off your phone, get on the ground, look them in the eyes, and start playing with them. Play is the first language of children, and by playing with our children we can start to understand them better. We can notice all sorts of things, like - the way that they communicate with other people; the way that they share and wait their turn; the way that they deal with hard and happy feelings; the way that deal with obstacles and tests and; the way that they feel about themselves and the world. Through play we can also start to teach them about feelings, choices and consequences, sharing, communicating, problem-solving, resilience and empathy. We do this by role-modelling these skills ourselves when we are playing with them. Children learn from what they see, and when you demonstrate sharing when you are playing, they will start sharing as well. When you show them a good way of communicating your feelings, they will copy you. And so we go on. When you are playing together find crafty ways to steal little moments to demonstrate the way you want your child to act when they are playing with other children. You can even go into the play session with the intention to demonstrate something specific, and then create the learning opportunity. Sneaky, clever parent! Parenting is a wonderfully tough job, especially when there are two! Be gentle. You’re probably doing much better than you think.
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14 multiple seasons
Paul Bushell Psychologist and Author of #raisingkids To Thrive in a Constantly Changing World www.bushell.co.za
facebook chat Danielle Rhaine Botes July 22 at 12:18 PM
My twins are 4 days old (born at 36+4) and I’m struggling to produce enough milk. Have had to formula feed just to keep them going because their blood sugar levels dipped quite low. Have been trying to pump as well to encourage milk production but am still getting too little. Any advice?
Andrea Doherty Wiggill How often are you
pumping? And how good is your pump? Perhaps hire a hospital grade pump for a few weeks, they make a huge difference and pump after every feed. Good luck. It’s a job getting your milk up!
Deanne Anderson Drink milky rooibos tea if you can, ginger tea as well. Or jungle juice. Erika Steyn It’s early days it will get easier and
better! Feed as frequently as you possibly can, the more they suck on you the more you will produce. Proper latching is NB. Do you have a lactation consultant who can make sure that they latch properly? The more formula they drink the less they will drink from you the less you will produce. Expressing frequently with a good hospital grade pump can be a great help. Just be gentle with your breasts. Join a support group like la leche league for help as well. It takes several weeks for the quantity of milk to stabilise . However every drop of breastmilk is important now. Enjoy your babies!
Danielle Rhaine Botes I have a lactation
consultant coming to visit tomorrow. Luckily it seems like my milk production has increased over the course of today. Just need to get the latch right now
Amanda Lee Samuelson-vd Merwe
Jungle juice 2 litres a day. Egglynol from doc drink 3 times a day. Eat oats, Oats cookies, Lactation biscuits
Bronwyn Price Pump for 20-30 minutes every
2-3 hours. Use a hospital grade pump like the Medela Symphony. Drink lots of fluids, at least 3l a day (I craved Milo with hot milk and still drink that every day). Eat properly - oats are good, proteins and good fats. You need three good meals and snacks in between. Give it time - it can take a while for your milk to come in. Keep pumping and nursing when you can! You’ve got this!
Bronwyn Price Also see from your hospital if you can get donor milk for them
Aaseema Mugjenkar Ismail La Leche League!
Contact them...or join their facebook page! I wish I knew about them with my twins. Also drink lots and lots of water. Your milk will start to come in soon. Just keep pumping/ them latching
FB POLL
Marion Kate created a poll How long did you breastfeed for? 4 months
+49
1 year
+34
Never
+32
6 months
+28
2 years
+15
3 months
+9
Helét Mulder Page Indeed. There are LaLeche consultants everywhere and they are fantastic. The sooner you get help from them the better. They also have the best breastpumps to hire...
Tanya Smit Ask your Gynae for Eglonyl Liza-Marie Sciolla Milkstout and sprite - old
wives tales my mom got me pushing that the day we got home from the hospital
Kelly Caden Feeding from the breast will produce more milk than pump alone. But continue pumping, with a double pump, at all missed feeds at a minimum, and remember your babies are still little they don’t need that much milk to start with. Stress doesn’t help with milk production, so as hard as it is try not to worry too much, and do what you can do. And they won’t starve, becuase there is formula. Be careful with Eglynol, it is an anti psychotic drug and left my sister suicidal, rather try other methods first. Marisol Basson It’s still early days. Our triplets
were born at 29 weeks and I religiously pumped every 3 hours, day and night. Took about 10 days before I had a steady milk flow. Strongs mama, it gets easier.
Nikita Pienaar Totally agree. Also born 29 weeks had no milk had to pump every 3 hours. Wilma Hubbard Congratulations!!! I asked your mom just the other day if her double grandkids have arrived yet. She was so excited. Just hang in there. It is still early. Ask your GP to put you on Espiride. Not only does it help to keep you calm but helps with milk producing. Jungle juice is just a myth when it comes to producing milk but it is good to drink as keep your energy levels up. What helped for me was ginger beer I bought at Home Industries. Shout if you have any questions!!! I can send you my Whatsapp nr if you want to chat. Xxx Hang in there and well done for keeping them in so long. Nikita Pienaar Keep on pumping every 3-4 hours. Milk will start to come in day 4. Marizelle Van Niekerk Lots of great advise... brewers yeast tablets also helps and have them drink on demand and not routine... helps stimulate milk production... even if they suck for comfort and not drinking at first. Do not stress too much about it, as stress prevents milk production!
Amor Herbst Congratulations Danielle, what a blessing to have 2 precious babies:-) What makes you think you are not producing enough milk? Frequent nursing encourages good milk supply and reduces engorgement. Aim for nursing at least 10 – 12 times per day (24 hours). You CAN’T nurse too often – you CAN nurse too little. Nurse at the first signs of hunger (stirring, rooting, hands in mouth)– don’t wait until baby is crying. Allow baby unlimited time at the breast when sucking actively, then offer the second breast. Some newborns are excessively sleepy at first–wake baby to nurse if 2 hours (during the day) or 4 hours (at night) have passed without nursing. Weight gain: Normal newborns may lose up to 7% of birth weight in the first few days. After mom’s milk comes in, the average breastfed baby gains about 30g a day. Take baby for a weight check at the end of the first week or beginning of the second week. Consult with baby’s doctor and your lactation consultant if baby is not gaining as expected. Dirty diapers: In the early days, baby typically has one dirty diaper for each day of life (1 on day one, 2 on day two…). After day 4, stools should be yellow and baby should have at least 3-4 stools daily that are the size of a R5. Some babies stool every time they nurse, or even more often–this is normal, too. The normal stool of a breastfed baby is loose (soft to runny) and may be seedy or curdy. Wet diapers: In the early days, baby typically has one wet diaper for each day of life (1 on day one, 2 on day two…). Once mom’s milk comes in, expect 5-6+ wet diapers every 24 hours. To feel what a sufficiently wet diaper is like, pour 3 tablespoons (45 mL) of water into a clean diaper. A piece of tissue in a disposable diaper will help you determine if the diaper is wet. It’s incredibly important to establish a good support network of people who want to encourage you to reach your goals and have access to the right information. If you’re not sure if babies are latching properly (if breastfeeding hurts), get help instead of “waiting it out”. You can contact your nearest LLLLeader here or get a referral from her for an IBCLC www.lllsa.org
Vera J McKinon Carry on expressing, the milk will come. You can also use Eglonyl, that helps alot too.
multiple seasons
15 Winter 2018
my story
Raising conscious Kids in an unconscious World Take away their Voice you take away their Essence... “Start the way you would like to finish.” Those words were spoken to me by a colleague and fellow mom about a year and a half ago and has been my mantra since. The context of the conversation was the importance of routines, for everyone’s sanity, but more so when you have twins. I was about two years into this motherhood business and had the whole scheduling thing down. Analysing, creating, and adjusting schedules come naturally to me; I do it for a living, so this was a nobrainer. I’ll admit that when we found out we were having twins, I had a panic attack, but we reached out to other twin parents and gobbled up every piece of advice. The running themes? You guessed it, routines! So, here I was moseying along with my schedules and then this pesky thing happened, they turned three! They were becoming actual people with opinions and rapidly learning the words to express those opinions. Suddenly, it was no longer just about the schedules - the “doing”, I must incorporate the “being” too. I was at a loss.
Winter 2018
16 multiple seasons
I was raised in a culturally hierarchical society, where blind obedience trumped all. Questioning anything, even if it was valid, meant you were disrespectful. Children should be seen and not heard, right? My village did their best to instill manners and I thank them for the lessons. Especially today, where having respect for others is almost non-existent, a direct result of losing respect for oneself. However, me being obedient, meant that for a long time I lost my voice, lost my way. So how do I raise two boys to be conscious human beings, to maintain their voice? How do I not default to “Because I said so” or “because I love you, I only want what’s best for you”? I have no idea, but Aydin and Zachary teach me every day. I am extremely fortunate to have two different perspectives because even though they shared a human incubator for seven months, they are as different as night and day. They yank me out of my preoccupation with the next thing on the schedule with phrases like “no uh hmm for me mamma”, when I unconsciously answered Aydin’s question about medicine, or when Zachary turned my face towards his and forced eye contact during a conversation. In their unique way saying
Hear Me. See Me. Be Present. They hold up a mirror to my shortcomings and some days it’s a bitter pill to swallow. As an older mom of 39, who finally found her voice, I am raising kids in a completely different time and country. As a Canadian citizen now, I straddle the line between maintaining my roots while trying to shed unconscious and archaic ideas of what it means to be a parent. And it’s hard Y’all! But I will start by listening, learning to be a spectator rather than trying to control the outcome of what is ultimately their destinies. Hopefully, by starting to practice this, I will finish with two men who know how to use their voices, because I didn’t unconsciously mute them. Wish me luck! Written by Tahira Baulackey, South African born, immigrated to Alberta Canada after marriage to Ash Baulackey (Aug 17, 2002). Lived in the lovely ski resort town of Bannf, Alberta, Canada for a few years with the incredible Rockie mountains in full view every day. They now live in suburban bliss with the twins in Calgary (still in Alberta).
my story
multiple seasons
17 Winter 2018
travelling with twins
TRAVELLING WITH MY TWO... Travelling with Multiples… 3 words likely to make anyone shudder. The reality is, it’s really exciting, fun, exhausting, and somewhat stressful — just like every day of twin parenting.
baby bath (rooms have showers), a bottle warmer and the best of all – 24-hour access to a baby room fully stocked with complimentary yoghurt, purity, baby meals and sterilisers. This was music to my ears. We wouldn’t have to lug anything along! It was such a fabulous trip that we decided to book again as soon as we could!
Our first trip was booked and paid for before our twin boys, Max and Ty, had even arrived in July 2013. When I was six-months pregnant we decided we wanted a nice December holiday, but with 5- month old twins it had to be hasslefree. We had been to Club Med Bali on honeymoon in 2011 and had noticed how family friendly it was.
We kept our promise and found ourselves back there with 13-month old twins in August 2014 with a group of friends. Unfortunately, on day 3 our twins got sick (vomiting). We weren’t sure if it was the watermelon or a virus, so we called a Doctor from the resort infirmary who gave us some meds, and as kids are, they bounced back in no time. The twins were a LOT busier on this trip and it was not as relaxing as the previous year.
So, my first thought about a “hassle free” holiday went to Club Med which offers fully inclusive family vacations at resorts around the world. We settled on Mauritius due to the relatively short 4-hour flight time. I was reassured of our decision to book 4* La-Pointeaux-Canonniers resort which offered 2 interleading club rooms, 2 cots, linen, a
Winter 2018
18 multiple seasons
Cost: approx. R50 000 for family of 4 (including airfares. Kids fly free under 2) TIPS: Book flights as close to sleep time as possible. Take your own tin of formula in your hand luggage in case your luggage doesn’t arrive. Take a baby carrier to be hands free when travelling.
That December we were a little braver and bought a Venter trailer and decided to drive down to PE from Joburg. It felt like we literally packed our entire house for the trip. We stayed over enroute and had DVD’s, CD’s and tons of snacks in the car. We flew our nanny Thembi down which was wonderful, and she loved it too as it was her first time at the coast. Thembi and I flew back with the twins while Dad drove home. It was a success! We had a great holiday, so we went back to PE the following year! Cost: R60 000 (for 2 weeks including house rental, food, flights and fuel) TIP: Invest in a trailer. They aren’t very expensive, and we use ours often! The following year we came across an amazing opportunity to buy a share in a trout farm in Dullstroom, just 2 ½ hours from Joburg. This has become our piece of paradise and we are fortunate to visit Waterval every 6 weeks. Being outdoors is wonderful for the boys. The teachers are always amazed how much the boys know about nature.
travelling with twins
follow the adventure
TIPS FOR FLYING WITH TWINS • Have an extra change of clothes. • Bring enough food, you are allowed to carry on prepared formula once it has been checked. • Ensure you have enough nappies and wet wipes. • Twins favourite toys, from books, to plush toys. No noisy toys that will disturb the other passengers.
In December 2016 we found ourselves back at Club Med for my best friends 40th Birthday. We were now fully entrenched in the Club Med vibe! There is nothing wrong with going to the same place if it works for you. Mauritius is our happy place. Cost: R100 000 gulp! (yes, prices have gone up and now we pay for all 4 flights!) Besides family holidays, over the past 10 years my husband and I have been following his dream to conquer the World 6 marathons, with Boston marathon scheduled as his last. We decided to make it a family trip over the April school holidays. Flying 15hrs from Jhb – NY was an overnight flight, so the boys slept most of the time and watched movies. I was so relieved! Over 12 days we visited Boston, Montreal, Toronto and New York – staying in 4 different hotels, 5 flights, a train trip and many miles of walking. The boys never asked to be carried once. I was so worried about the walking - I even contemplated borrowing a twin stroller, but honestly with all the sights and sounds the boys loved walking!
TIP: Always have a bottle of water and snacks handy and invest in a good backpack! Plan your trip in advance and pre-book tickets for the attractions as the queues are long. Don’t take too much luggage as you have to carry it! I packed 6 sets of clothes for the boys which they wore twice over, in the 12 days. It was winter so jackets etc took up a lot of space. There are so many little weekends away that I haven’t even touched on, we are a busy family and love to travel. We work on a tight budget and rely on miles, friends, family and special offers to make our travel dreams a reality. In closing I can honestly recommend that you fill your life with adventures, even if its just a day trip somewhere. These are the memories that children remember, not the toys.
• Carry all documents like passports, birth certificates etc in one plastic folder that is easy to reach. • Give yourself loads of extra time, your children pick up on your stress and the unforeseen can happen. Check in can be delayed, they may need to have nappy changes, they could loose their favourite toy and so the list goes on. • Share the work load with whoever you are travelling with. You don’t need to be a super mom or super dad. Its the start of a holiday and everyone needs to enjoy it. • Dont keep the children confined to sitting places, let them run around in the airport in play areas so that they can burn some energy. • Make use of the airport / airline strollers that are provided. • When passengers offer to help you, graciously accept it. They mean well. • You will need to break your routines a bit, flexibility is key to a good holiday. • Request the front seats with extra leg room and where the carry cots fit for babies especially for long distance flights.
Written by Susan Krause mom of twin boys, Ty and Max.
By marION SMITH multiple seasons
19 Winter 2018
my story
Story of the twin roots of the Jappie (Jabier) family
Our Ancestors 1st generation born at The Cape, Arfaan and Galfaan Jappie (Jabier)
My Great, great,great grandfather was exiled from Indonesia to the Cape Colony for opposing Dutch colonists in his home country. He was born in Jakarta. As was my great, great,great grandmother. She was born in Bali. Majority of exiles were sadly forced into slavery.
great grandfather was still quite young. Great grandfather was a very spiritual person and became an Imaam in the Vrededorp area. He had the view that all things belong to God and that we can’t take anything with us to the grave. This view saw him lose much of what should have been his (and our?) inheritance. His brothers were more world-wise.
Afrikaans people still make today is very different from the light and airy, spicy Cape Malay koeksuster, which has a thin syrup coating and a sprinkling of coconut. I would not doubt that each of these two communities will swear that their version
My grandfather and his brothers were in the furniture trade. Some family members still have businesses in this industry today. Grandfather was a master furniture polisher and his work Sisters, Young Faieza and Meda, with aunts and grandfather on ruined his health. He had to These two met and married in Cape Town, the right. Hand on head – Faieza. Called the terrible twins (but retire due to emphysema and not twins – 18 months apart) South Africa. Their surname was Jabier lung problems which eventually but the Dutch masters called them Jappie. is the better! The milk tart or melktert is lead to lung cancer to It was common practice for another example. The Dutch/Afrikaans which he succumbed slave owners to change the version is a shortcrust base with an many years later. Growing names of slaves. This became egg and milk custard filling cooked on up, I remember that our surname to this day, and the stove, cooled and poured into the when someone was therefore anyone with this pasty case and sprinkled with cinnamon. getting married, all the surname are most probably The Cape Malay version is a puff pastry men worked together for related. They had twin sons, months over the weekends named Arfaan and Galfaan. to build the bedroom Jappie stayed the family suite for the bridal couple. name of Arfaan’s descendents. Regardless of what day Galfaan’s descendents took on job or career they had, his name as their family name. they had to assist in this The Galfaan’s are still resident woodwork project. My in the Bo-Kaap, which is prime father, a bus driver, was real estate close to Cape Town not exempt. The bedroom Grandmother, Fatima Jappie city centre. When they were suite was very ornate and granted their freedom, some slaves were built in solid wood with carvings as well. granted land and these hard-working and Once installed in the bedroom it was resourceful people worked their way up never moved or removed as it was so to become property owners in their own huge. right. They have single-, double- and triple Our Indonesian exiled ancestors were storey homes in this prime location close slaves to the Dutch in the Cape and to the historical muslim cemetary in the performed various menial tasks for them the Bo-Kaap area. around the home and in their businesses. My grandparents – Saaid & Fatima Jappie (grandmother died before I was born) My family stem from the twin brother, They worked in various industries like Arfaan and they were eventually based in farming, fishing, woodwork, textiles. base and it is baked in the oven with Newclare, Johannesburg where my father, The Indonesian slaves were the preferred the custard, also cinnamon sprinkled. As grandfather and his brothers all grew cooks from among all the slaves. There the Malay women cooked for the Dutch up. The brothers and their families lived are many dishes between the Afrikaans they used their own background in taste, close together over a 4 block area. and Cape Malay which are similar. An flavour and spice to make their version of My father relates that our great, great example is koeksisters - The syrup laden, many dishes. These were reminiscent of grandfather worked very hard and was a baking powder-based koeksisters that home to them. huge property owner but died when our Written by Faieza Sanders Winter 2018
20 multiple seasons
recipe
Faieza’s Cape Malay Koeksusters Yields 4 dozen INGREDIENTS 4 small potatoes (+-250g) 4 cups flour 1 tspn salt 1 sachet instant yeast 1/4 cup sugar 2 tspn grated nutmeg 1 tspn ground cloves 3 tspn ground cinnamon 2 tspn ground ginger 1/2 tspn ground cardomom/elachi 2 TBspn ground dried naartjie peel 1 cup warm milk 2 TBspn butter 2 eggs 1/4 cup oil for kneading and forming koeksusters. Oil for deep frying All this is to give background to my grandfather’s amazing Koeksuster recipe. Every Saturday he spent the whole day making Koeksusters and the whole kitchen smelled of cinnamon, dried naartjie peel, and other spices. I watched him often. One day I asked him to write the recipe down for me and he told me he could not. He did not measure with spoons or cups. He just threw ingredients together by hand in what seemed a very random fashion to me. He had made this so often that he did not need a recipe. He also gauged amounts based on the volume he was making. He told me to watch carefully as he was busy and to try to guess and estimate the quantities of the various ingredients. It was not easy. I don’t think that I have the exact recipe, but my version is as close as I can get and the palate is the judge. All in my family agree that it tastes like growing up in Newclare. My grandfather, Saaid Jappie, made Koeksusters for the whole family and some of the neighbours every week. He did not charge for this, as sharing food is an integral part of Muslim culture. Our job as kids, was to arrive early on Sunday morning to deliver the hot treat to every family home in time for that early cup of coffee. Grandfather got up very early to douse the koeksusters in the piping hot syrup. This in itself was an art – too long in the syrup and the koeksuster would be too sweet and soggy, too short a time and it would not be sweet enough and be dry, if the syrup reduced too much it will be hard and crusty in sugar when it cooled, If the syrup was too thin in texture then the koeksuster would be soggy and fall apart. It took real skill and practice. The whole neighborhood was a-waft with the smell of fresh, aromatic Koeksusters.
I LIKE TO GRIND WHOLE SPICES TO GIVE A REALLY INTENSE FLAVOUR. I keep a coffee grinder or spice grinder just for these spices. I never wash this grinder. To dry naartjie peel – wash naartjies as soon as you bring them from the store. Keep a tray with paper towel handy and leave the peels to dry. When they are very dry transfer to a glass jar and keep in your pantry for use during the year. It must be very dry or it will go mouldy.
SYRUP Whole spices: 4 elachi, cinnamon stick, 6 cloves, 2 large pieces dried naartjie peel 3 cups sugar 2 cups water Desiccated Coconut for sprinkling.
multiple seasons
21 Winter 2018
recipe METHOD Boil potatoes with skin on, peel and mash. This MUST be very smooth, no lumps. Sift all dry ingredients. Cream butter and eggs together. Add to mash. Add milk to mash. Add to flour mixture and knead for a few minutes. Dough will be very sticky. Use the 1/4 cup of oil bit by bit on hands to avoid dough sticking to hands. Cover bowl and wrap in cloth and keep in warm place to double in size.
The accompanying pictures will help you gauge the texture and what it should look like at various stages. It’s not just a recipe. It’s not difficult. To get it just right, make them at least 3 or 4 times in succession to get the knack of it. Don’t give up – its worth it! Dough proving and shaping
MAKE SYRUP Boil all ingredients for about 20 minutes. It will be a golden colour. Don’t let it reduce to be too thick and sticky. Thin out with more warm water and let it boil through before adding fried koeksusters to syrup. The syrup may thicken after a few batches. Stop and thin out syrup with more water and boil through before continuing. When dough has doubled in size. Knock down. Oil the counter top and form your koeksusters. Keep some oil aside for hands as the dough is very sticky and soft. By the time you have formed all 48 they would have doubled in size. Deep fry to golden in colour. Put on paper towel to drain excess oil. They can be added to syrup as soon as cooled or freeze in small ziplock bags in 6’s or cling wrap. Make sure there is not too much air around them. They can be removed from freezer 20 minutes before you need to syrup them. Once defrosted, syrup them and sprinkle with coconut. This way you will always have fresh koeksusters! Don’t leave in the syrup too long as they will soak up too much, especially if the syrup is too thin. I sometimes like the thicker syrup. The koeksuster will harden when cooled and have crunchy outside but soft moist inside, and it wont be too sweet inside. Sprinkle with desiccated coconut while they are hot out of the syrup. I keep leftover syrup in the fridge in a glass bottle. As I need to syrup koeksusters, I do this in a small pot. Add more sugar or/and water to increase volume when necessary. Cook it to the correct consistency before adding the koeksusters. Leftover, cooled syrup again goes back into fridge in a bottle. The syrup will continue to get darker as you use it. I keep this for about 2 weeks in the fridge. The koeksusters never last 2 weeks in our home, even if I make 3x the recipe and freeze some.
Making the syrup
Many people love aniseed in their koeksusters but I really can’t stand the taste and biting on the seeds. You can add some if you prefer. I’m not sure if my grandfather added aniseed.
Frying Koeksusters
Winter 2018
22 multiple seasons
tips
Rules for your babysitter Babysitting is the perfect way for students to earn some extra money. However it comes with rules and responsibilities. Go over your expectations with the babysitter to make sure everything is clear and have an open line of communication with her.
• CPR and first aid trained : Before hiring a babysitter make sure that she is CPR trained. The basic course is one day and anyone who takes care of children should have a valid certificate. • Written contactable references: The babysitter must provide a minimum of 2 but 3 is better references from previous childcare jobs that are written with contactable numbers on them. It is always better to call the numbers and verify the references for peace of mind. • Own reliable car and license : The babysitter must have her own reliable car that is road worthy and has back seat belts. She should have a valid license. Not only for getting to and from work but if there is an emergency you will know that she can get to the closest hospital / doctor. • No visitors : Nobody may visit your house when you are not there. If something needs to be delivered by a family member or you are expecting a delivery it should be cleared by both the family and babysitter as early as possible. • Phone use to a minimum : Young students love to be on their phone. If you allow the babysitter to make use of the wifi in your house explain the rules such as she may only be on the phone once the children are asleep. Let her know she cannot be on her phone during awake time with the children as she needs to watching them.
• Rough play : Adults as well as children get carried away at times playing games. Running around the house playing Hide and seek, Cowboys and Indians can start off harmlessly and with all the excitement invariably someone gets hurt. You want your babysitter to have energy and entertain the children but explain what the limits and boundaries are around this sort of playing. • Dont take photos of the house and children : Let the babysitter know your views regarding photos of your children. Many parents don’t want their children on social media and as they are minors it is to be taken seriously. It is best to make it clear that she is not to take selfies in your house as this is showing the interior of your house. • Bed time rules : Let the babysitter know what time you children go to bed and the normal routine that they follow, for example bathing,brushing their teeth, reading a book for 10 minutes etc. • Television and screen time rules : Is the sitter allowed to watch TV ? If so should she be watching adult shows while the children are awake. They may not be in the room but still have good hearing and pick up bad language etc. Let her know what your acceptable guidelines are regarding the children playing on iPads, cell phones etc. • No physical discipline : There is no
excuse for any formal of physical discipline and you must make it clear that you will not tolerate it. Explain your method of discipline, be it sitting on the thinking chair or quiet corner or taking away a favourite toy etc. • Meal time: Confirm what food and drinks you children are allowed to eat. If they have any allergies let the babysitter know this. Also the babysitter should ask the parents if she intends on introducing any new food just as a precaution • Social media rules: don’t allow the babysitter to post status updates that she is at your house or tag photos of your children on social media. People will know she is alone at your house with the children. • Be alert at all times: It is not easy for anyone to be everywhere at once, however if the babysitter has kept distractions to a minimum it should be easier for her to focus on the job at hand which is to take care of you children first and foremost. • Report back: When the babysitter leaves ask her a report back on the evening’s activities. f you have a book that she completes of activities run through it with her before she leaves. Written by : Marion Smith A mom of four boisterous boys and owner of Aupairs Exclusive where she has been placing staff for over 13 years. www.aupairsexclusive.co.za multiple seasons
23 Winter 2018
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