Struggle Brother

Struggle Brother

By Robert McDowell IG: @robbwayy

Watching the blood leak from different potholes in your body left me lost and numb. Thinking my brother didn’t just leave me, right before my eyes, the person who swore he’d always be by my side through the thickest times and uncontrollable situations.

Someone who swore they’d never lie to me but in their last moments lied to me. Holding you in my arms hearing those last breathes, hearing the blood fill your throat up and listening to you choke off it as you struggle to speak repeats in my brain like a looped track.

You always cared about others always putting yourself last even in your last moments the lie you told me, “Don’t… Don’t worry… I’m good bro…. I’ll be fine…”

Every time I close my eyes, I see those moments, heart so filled with hate due to your fate I can’t stomach the constant reminder of you watching you take those last breath.

The way we were attached at the hip you’d think we had the same mother and father, but the same struggle that took your life is the same struggle that made us brothers.

A brotherhood bonded by struggle that blood couldn’t make up, my tears falling in your Bullet Wounds hit like salt on slave wounds. In that moment, October 21, 2016 at 7:50pm, when I closed your eyes holding you in my arms, you left me lost and numb.