Leading Hearts May/June 2015 Issue by Leading Hearts Magazine

PEACE KEEPERS

WAYS TO

RECLAIM SERENE SPACE

RESTORING THE REST IN YOUR LIFE

A MUSLIM DAUGHER, A CHRISTIAN MOTHER

“CAN WE HEAL OUR TORN FAMILY?”

BLANCA

I KNOW WHO I AM

“I often say it doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful. Holley Gerth shows women that is just as true for our hearts as it is for every other area of our lives.” Myquillyn Smith (The Nester), founder, The Nesting Place blog

Bestselling author, counselor, and life coach helps women lay down unrealistic goals, break free from the pressure to be perfect, and start living fully rather than simply trying not to fail.

Holleygerth.com

Available wherever books and ebooks are sold.

YOUR CALL AT THE END OF THE WORLD “THIS YEAR SEEMS TO BE

RACING INTO THE FUTURE, SHOOTING PAST THE SIGNS IN THE HEAVENS including March’s

“

complete solar eclipse not to mention April’s red moon rising (Joel 2: 31-32).

Then there’s war. Rumors or war. Persecution of Christians around the world. The rise of ISIS. Unrest in the Middle East. My goodness, what’s next? If you are like many believers, you may feel a strange uneasiness. Are the rumors of the arrival of the end of days true? Is the Lord about to take his believers home? Is the promise of Schemka as portrayed in the best-selling Jonathan Cahn novel about to reveal a world-wide financial crash? And what about you? Do you find you are holding your breath; afraid to plan for the future? You are not the only one. Recently, one of my writer friends told me, “With all the signs of the end of times, I’m afraid to start a project that I won’t be able to finish.” I told her, “Yes, perhaps we are coming into the home stretch, but we do not know exactly where we are on God’s time line. My grandmother assumed Jesus would return in the sixties, just as Christians through the centuries have assumed Jesus’ return was at hand. But the truth is, we believers have never known how much time any of us has left.” I mention this conversation to remind you there are still unfulfilled prophecies. There could still be a “long night” ahead of us, or even a season of “long nights.” But regardless, we cannot neglect the work God has called us to do. The question is this; if we don’t write the book on our

FROM THE PUBLISHER hearts, if we don’t reach out to the lost, if we put every thing on hold as we wait on our rooftops for the return of the Lord, will we fail to reach the very people God calls us to lead to His kingdom? The answer is yes. So why sit around scratching our heads when we have a ripe harvest in front of us? We are the workers Jesus talked about when he said, “The harvest is great, but the workers are few. So pray to the Lord who is in charge of the harvest; ask him to send more workers into his fields.” Luke 10:2 (NLT) To those who are in ministry or who minister to others; don’t let fear of the future keep you from all you’ve been called to do. In fact, this is the time to double your efforts. Plan that writing project; start that blog, put your women’s event on your church calendar, feed the hungry, start that church building campaign. Don’t hold back. Do all you feel led to do. And in so doing keep these words of Jesus close to your heart, “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” John 14:27 (NKJV) Go in peace and fulfill your calling. S

Blessings,

LINDA EVANS SHEPHERD PUBLISHER, LEADING HEARTS MAGAZINE

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EMPOWERING CHRISTIAN WOMEN FOR LEADERSHIP

LEADING HEARTS MAY/JUNE 2015 VOL. 2, ISSUE 2

EDITORIAL STAFF PUBLISHER.. ..................Linda Evans Shepherd EDITOR...... ..................A mber Weigand-Buckley ART DIRECTOR..............Amber Weigand-Buckley ADVERTISING. ............... Linda Evans Shepherd & Angelina Locricchio COPY EDITOR. ..............Amber Weigand-Buckley EDITORIAL SECRETARY. ....A ngelina Locricchio CONTRIBUTING WRITERS................................................... Angela Breidenbach, Rebekah Binkley Montgomery, Penelope Carlevato, Kathy Collard Miller, Michelle S. Cox, Saundra Dalton-Smith, Dr. Edna Ellison, Sharon Norris Elliot, Pam Farrel, Torry Martin, Mike Parker, Paula Parker, Patricia and Alana Raybon, Rhonda Rhea, Heather Riggleman, Jennifer Taylor, Lisa Troyer and Karen H. Whiting.

RIGHT TO THE HEART BOARD MEMBERS Linda Evans Shepherd (President), Dianne Butts, Sharon Norris Elliot, Dr. Edna Ellison, Karen Porter, Kathy Collard Miller, Rhonda Rhea and Carole Whang Schutter and Joy A. Schneider

INFORMATION Leading Hearts magazine is published bimonthly by Right to the Heart Ministries 2015. ADVERTISING | Display rates are available at leadinghearts.com. By accepting an advertisement, Leading Hearts does not endorse any advertiser or product. We reserve the right to reject advertisements not consistent with the magazines objectives. MANUSCRIPTS | Writers guidelines are available at leadinghearts.com. Leading Hearts | PO Box 6421, Longmont, CO 80501 phone: (303) 835-8473 | fax: (303)678-0260 email: lindareply@gmail.com MEMBER | 2015 Evangelical Press Association Award of Merit Winner All rights reserved. Copyrighted material reprinted with permission Photos courtesy of: Barbour Books, Dollar Photo Club, Gotee Records, Kerry Kara Photography /KLS Photos & Imaging, Deanna Sammons Photography (Inlight Studios), Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Image Photography, Leafwood Press, +180 RECORDS, torrymartin.com, Thomas Nelson, Revell, 7-N Music, Word Entertainment and Zondervan.

TABLE OF

CONTENTS 08 “CAN WE TALK?”

18 STRAPPED: MY WINDY ROAD TO FINANCIAL PEACE

BLANCA, ELLIE HOLCOMB & THE GIRLS OF FIREFLIGHT

BEHIND THE SCENES

28 RECLAIM YOUR SERENE SPACE 32 EMBRACING THE SPIRIT OF PEACE 45 SHAMELESS SELFPROMOTION

this issue

every issue 12 FAITHPRINTS

16 CHECKMATE 24 IN THE LEAD

27 JUST 18 SUMMERS 28 HEALTH TRACKS 30 IN THE SPOT 31 LIFEBYTES

37 PRAYER CIRCLE 38 BELLY LAUGHS 40 REVIEWS 44 TRUTH

JESUS IS NOT MY “IDOL”

“I WANTED TO GET HOME. I

WAS TIRED AND LOOKING FOR THE QUICKEST OPTION TO GET TO SEE MY HUBBY AND THREE GIRLS AFTER A TIME OF MINISTRY IN NEW YORK That was the only thing on

“

my mind when I exited the baggage claim in Springfield, Missouri — so I hopped the first cab I saw. However, as I plopped down on the seat, I soon discovered that this was more than just a trip getting me from point A to my destination. God was setting me up for an en-route lesson in perspective. My cab driver had a mini-plastic Buddha poised in front of his speedometer and a pretty sad rubber eagle attached to his rear-view with strings holding up his floppy wings. It was apparent — he had the vision to soar, but unfortunately the source he was plugging into was plastic. As I sat in the back seat, I began to ponder the view of the dashboard and realized that many times as I Christian, I’ve treated Christ the same way. The platform in which I have built my writing profession. Another award on the wall. Something that is pretty that I can take out and look at to make me feel better on a rough day. Or something that people admire about me as I give them insight on faith or life issues they are struggling with. And by the way if you are truly saved you need to type AMEN under every one of my status updates...because it makes me feel good...about myself. It’s easy to grow comfortable with that bobble-head Jesus precariously placed next to our steering wheel. However, if we limit Him to plastic that is what we get— bobble-head Jesus only nods with each bump in the

FROM THE EDITOR road. But, when we take time to discover the “Whoness” of who He is and allow Him to “Work Out” in us, we will discover so much more than just a “plastic” image— we will realize that He is everything. Everything I want to abide in... Everything that I want to be transformed by... Everything that takes me through my day... Every good thing that one can possibly embrace... In Him we have breath in our lungs. In Him we drop the insecurities and baggage of life to abide in peace within the chaos and uncertainity of life. In Him we move into everything He has called us to be. This issue of Leading Hearts is dedicated to growing peace in our lives in the whatever will bes of the whatever may comes—because in leadership as well as in life, windy roads are ahead and bobble-head Jesus can’t drive a car. S

Peace! AMBER WEIGAND-BUCKLEY EDITOR, LEADING HEARTS MAGAZINE

BY PATRICIA & ALANA RAYBON @PATRICIARAYBON

before Mother’s Day something more. I wish she wasn’t a Muslim. So now I’ve said it. In my heart. And right here on a page. Oh so quiet. But oh so brave. I’ve said it. Like a prayer. O my

AUTHORS --------www.UndividedBook.com

“CAN WE

TALK?” —PATRICIA—

“THE ELEPHANT IS IN THE

ROOM, AND IT’S BIG. SO IT’S NOT MOVING. NOT ONE TURN. NOT ONE INCH. Still, my

“

daughter and I talk around it, pretending our tenton problem isn’t there—insisting it will stay quiet and be okay if we just ignore the obvious and keep on moving. So we’re politely jawing about my kitchen cabinets and drawers, nicely talking about my fight to finally clean them out and make some order and find some peace. “You’re decluttering?” Alana says. “Why now? Your kitchen is fine.”

But it’s not fine. Not really. And neither are we. Not like we used to be. Or maybe never were. Yet how can I even think such a thing? After all, I know God. I know all my God can do. That’s how I boast anyway. Most days I boast, that is. But it’s the day before Mother’s Day. Alana has called me on the phone to say hi, tell me she loves me, wish me the best. I’m hanging on to every word, as I always do when my daughters call, ecstatic to hear their living and lovely voices. Yet with Alana, there’s always this wish: that things were different—back to the way they once were or the way I wish they’d always been, so long ago now I can’t seem to remember. Like they were? Yes. I wish she was still a Christian. No, that’s not the whole of it. I wish on this day

On this almost Mother’s Day, this mother wants to know: How did we come to this moment in time and, by faith, become divided? Why, indeed, are we on the phone blahblahing about my kitchen decluttering project—my countless trips to my neighborhood Bed Bath & Beyond and the Container Store in the fancy neighborhood across town and the Goodwill store down the street and wherever else I can go to chase down plastic shelf organizers and dividers—when the biggest part of our lives, what we believe about God and how we practice that belief, is such a split and holy wreck?

A Christian and a Muslim? In the same family? How, O blessed God, did such a thing happen? Too many times I tried to find an answer. God knows I tried. In prayers. In books. In dreams. In the quiet of silent nights and the roar of jampacked days. Like mothers of daughters everywhere, I’ve stood in the silence of a locked room, stared at myself in a mirror, and asked God, why? And how? How in the robust name of Jesus did this happen? And like those other mothers everywhere, I was angry when I asked. Mad at life. At my daughter. At myself. Maybe angrier at God for not stepping into the messiness of this business we call life and calling a divine stop. But God doesn’t work that way. And look how I say that. As if I do know God. As if I understand God. As if I accept with calm how God moves—and how God doesn’t move—and how he lets us wrestle and struggle and grasp and stew and wail and wonder. Then he lets us choose, despite knowing beforehand how we’re going to choose—even when he knows we’ll choose wrong. So the psalmist nailed it right? Saying it this way? That God knows “when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I’m far away” (Ps. 139:2 NLT)?

SO GOD KNEW? - continued on p. 10-

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- continued from p. 9 -

HE KNEW. Before this embattled earth was formed, he knew Alana and I would be rumbling over these three defiant words spouted from her beautiful confident mouth: “I’m a Muslim.” My heart didn’t stop exactly. It sank straight to the floor. But not from the announcement. It sank from the struggle that had brought us to this moment. First, those teen years—with their relentless arguments and fussing and door slamming and confusion and yelling. Then the testing years—when, at twenty, Alana joined the Nation of Islam. And I fought that. Arguing against the theology of the Nation. Thundering against the messages that sounded to me like too much hate. Then at this big, big moment—when my daughter officially renounced Christianity by choosing to leave it for “orthodox Islam,” as she called it, I stayed silent. And neutral. “Thanks for letting us know,” I said. She was twenty something and a junior in college. So I gripped the phone and asked about school. Her classes. Her teachers. How her car was running.

—Patricia and Alana Raybon.

How her car was running? Yes, I asked her exactly that. Then we said a few other neutral things. Have a good afternoon. Thanks for calling. Talk to you later. Then I hung up the phone. So I didn’t fight for Jesus. Not on that day. Not because I didn’t care. And not because I didn’t love every single thing about Jesus more than life itself—and still love him just as much, if not more now than on that day. Yet I didn’t fight for him because, on that day, I just didn’t know how to fight. My life had changed. My Christian daughter became a Muslim. And my life and every single thing about life just flatout flew apart. So here I sit today, ten years after my daughter made her announcement, staring at my keyboard in my belabored home office—which also is a wreck and needs decluttering and an overhaul. Still, even in this mess, I commit to speak truth about the biggest mountain in my life that has yet to move. I wish my daughter wasn’t a Muslim. Wrong to say? Probably.

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cAn we tAlk?

time. It’s late. I’m exhausted and ready for some peace and quiet.

But elephants don’t move if they can’t see. They are shortsighted and deliberate. If things don’t look clear and understandable and logical, they won’t budge. Unless they get startled. Then, experts say, they go on a rampage. And my home and hearth are messy enough already.

After a day full of dental appointments for our four year-old, our two-year-old, and me—because I’m pregnant again—plus waiting in the neverending line at our local post office, I need a moment. But I can’t sleep just yet because I’m staring at my computer, trying to figure out a way to explain to my mother why I became a Muslim.

I long for logic and order and peace. And I long to talk. To finally look together at the reality of our life—and not end up arguing and slamming doors and yelling and walking away, especially without answers. Surely now—with almost ten years stuck in rubble—we finally can talk. Open and honest. But there’s one problem.

My Christian daughter is a Muslim. So how do we unclutter that? Every little piece of it. All the hard parts. The unexpected pieces. The curious twists and turns of struggling to live across faiths. Can’t we clear all that up? Should we even try? My mother’s heart tells me yes. Getting along but living divided has run its course. It’s time to move higher. Well, that’s what my saved, sanctified, filled with the Holy Ghost, Bibleloving soul thinks I should say. But how will Alana answer? Will she go with me on this journey? Put her daughter’s hand in mine? See where this path to truth and harmony takes us? Or is she terrified, like me, to try? Finally, I am ready to hear her answer. —ALANA—

Why am I a Muslim? It’s the big question of my life—and the big conun drum for a mother and a father I love. But my answers aren’t simple. And neither is my life. So as I sit in my dark bedroom considering this question, I look over at my husband, who fell asleep watching a UFC fight on the iPad, and hope that I won’t have to walk my oldest daughter back to bed for the third

Her question doesn’t surprise me. I know that, although we smile and go along with our daily lives as if nothing is wrong, she will probably never be at peace with my decision. Still, I wonder if I will be able to talk to her about such an emotional issue. My mother and I are really good at talking about easy stuff. Every time she calls, her usual questions are “How’re the kids?,” “How’s the hubby?,” and “How’s work?” And then I rattle off my own questions about what’s going on in her life. She informs me about Dad’s choir practice and her recent trip to Saver’s, the local thrift store, where she found some “practically new” outfit for a ridiculously low price. We laugh politely and then get off the phone. But we never talk about faith. I don’t think I’m scared to talk to her about it. I just don’t know how to begin. I talk about faith all the time to Muslim friends. Even curious coworkers. I occasionally get questioned by parents and students at the elementary school where I teach fourth grade. The shy and reserved looks on their faces make it seem as if they are uncomfortable talking about my faith. I’m so used to the questions that I give automatic responses and make sure to be politically correct since I work in a public school. The kids mostly ask innocent questions based on what they see: “Why do you wear that thing on your head? Aren’t you hot?” I remember one student, a thirdgrade girl, pulling me aside and whispering, “Are you bald under that scarf?” I grinned and politely replied, “I’m trying to be extra modest.” Or I may have said, “I wear loose fitting clothing because it breathes easily.” My student smiled, looking uncomfortable, still staring at me in wonder. If I can answer questions from someone else, why can’t I talk to my mother about my faith? - continued on p. 13-

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FROM THE HEART

“... STRIVE FOR FULL RESTORATION, ENCOURAGE ONE ANOTHER, BE OF ONE MIND, LIVE IN PEACE. AND THE GOD OF LOVE AND PEACE WILL BE WITH YOU.” —2 CORINTHIANS 13:11, NIV

n the podcast

LEADINGHEARTS.COM

UNDIVIDED—THE ROAD TO RESOLVING CO-AUTHORSHIP CONFLICT WITH PATRICIA RAYBON GET CONNECTED @LEADINGHEARTS.COM

- continued from p. 11 -

Most of the conversations with my mom are cut short anyway. I’m either on the way home from work and have to pick up the kids, or I already have the kids, and they’re screaming in my ear. We rarely have a decent amount of quiet, uninterrupted time to talk. Even during my visits to Colorado and her visits to Texas, the kids take up so much of our time and attention that there doesn’t seem to be the time to just sit down and say:

“So, Mom, wanna talk about why I became a Muslim?” The opportunity just doesn’t come up. I don’t really mind it. In fact, I think I kind of like avoiding the topic. It all feels so controversial, and I am too tired from work and the kids to deal with controversy. We’ve already endured enough drama since my conversion anyway. After I announced it, we didn’t talk. We shouted, yelled, and debated for hours until I eventually shied away, realizing the downfalls of my naive approach to “convince” her. Embarrassed and ashamed, I allowed our relationship to evolve into one of polite denial. I pretended that there wasn’t a divide forming between my mother and me, and I tried to keep in touch. It was easy because we were apart—she in my native Colorado and me in Texas with my new husband. As a recent college grad, I was busy setting up my fifthgrade classroom. We would chat about my workload and the stress of being a firstyear teacher. She would share about her church life and books. It was easy to pretend everything was okay—at least until she and my dad would visit. Then, somehow, the conversation would go in the direction of religion and eventually would erupt into a heated debate. A lot of words were spoken, hardly any of which were productive. We all were left feeling angry, frustrated, and exhausted. One muggy summer night, in my tiny newlywed apartment, the authenticity of the Bible came up in our post dinner discussion, and the conversation went downhill fast. Like a scene from an old Western, we all stared intensely across at each other, exhausted from the battle that had just occurred. “Wait,” my husband pleaded, as my parents got up to leave, unable to take any more arguing. “Don’t leave like this,” he said, holding out his hand to usher them back to the couch. We sat in silence for a while, allowing our heartbeats to

slow. The sounds of Houston’s busy streets trailed in from the open patio door. I took a breath and calmed down and then looked back at my parents. They stared at me with hurt and sadness in their eyes, and I knew that a rift would remain between us. So, quietly, I decided to leave it alone, realizing that these arguments were destroying my relationship with my parents. The flareups arose less and less, and with the birth of my first child, a lovely distraction conveniently appeared. And now we’ve actually agreed to talk about it, on paper at least, in a measured back-and-forth discussion. Surprisingly, it was my mother who initiated the idea. Maybe that was the necessary first step—to acknowledge that something has to change. That we can’t just go on ignoring the matters that weigh down our hearts. Maybe I’m willing to talk now because, for once, my mother has actually asked the question. I don’t recall her ever asking it before. In fact, I rarely remember her ever asking me about how I felt about these issues or my feelings about events in my life. And now she’s asked me to discuss one of the most important aspects of my life, and the floodgates are open. So I’ve agreed to talk in this manner, knowing that it’s time to address her concerns and confront our conflict headon. The time has flown by. It’s been ten years since my conversion, and it’s hard for me to understand how so much time could have passed without our sharing our feelings with each other about one of the most significant aspects of our lives. Something inside me says yes, it needs to be done. Even if it means rehashing the uncomfortable, hurtful, and sometimes embarrassing past that has led up to this moment—when we finally talk. But are we ready to receive what may come through those gates? I hope I’m ready, and I hope this journey brings us closer. We have to give it a try. S Excerpted with permission from Undivided by Patricia and Alana Raybon (Thomas Nelson) available for preorder at Amazon.com.

AUTHOR/SPEAKER ---------

FAITHPRINTS

BY REBEKAH BINKLEY MONTGOMERY

www.rebekahmontgomery.com

“HOW CAN I FIND PEACE WHEN…?”

“THERE ARE DISTINCT ADVAN-

TAGES TO BEING A PACKRAT. IN ADDITION TO KEEPING ALIVE THE HOPE THAT THE LEFT-HANDED THINGAMABOB INHERITED FROM GRANDMA WILL SOMEDAY FINANCE OUR RETIREMENT, THERE ARE OTHER UNSUNG PLUSES TO SQUIRRELING AWAY STUFF.

“

Leadership can add an extra layer of stress when it feels like people are looking to you to have it all together. The truth is, we all struggle with finding peace in certain areas of our lives. Here are five ways to quell common peace thieves.

#1 “GOD HAS FORGIVEN ME, BUT OTHERS CONTINUE TO REMIND ME OF MY PAST MISTAKES. HOW CAN I HAVE PEACE OF MIND WITH MY PAST HAUNTING ME?”

Consider reminders of your past mistakes as opportunities to testify to the forgiving power and grace of Jesus Christ.

You might answer the charges of others like this: “Yes, I did what you say. I sinned. But I am forgiven by the grace and power of Jesus’ sacrifice.” As one woman said after she confessed her adultery to God and her husband, “I’m free! You may not forgive me, but Jesus has! He doesn’t condemn me even if you do!” As we freely admit our flaws and past mistakes, God provides healing. Of course, we all need to make things right with those whom we have sinned against. But we do this because of a changed life newly filled with the power of Almighty God. Satan wants to make us feel condemned. After all, one of

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his names is “accuser of the brethren.” People who remind you or question about your past may be doing Satan’s work—or they may simply be looking for the same peace you now have.

#2 “HOW CAN I MAKE PEACE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS WRONGED ME? Sometimes you can’t. God himself longs for everyone to be at peace with Him, but that hasn’t happened yet. However, you can do two things: Pray for the person. Prayer is our secret weapon. Jesus told us to pray for our enemies. When people hurt you, pray that God will open their eyes to the love of Jesus. Ask the Holy Spirit to convict them of their sin then stand back and give Him room to work. At the same time, ask God to give you His unconditional love for your enemy. A woman whose church deacon father molested her for much of her childhood wrote: “The scars that my father inflicted upon me seemed so deep as to be inerasable. My tendency was and still is to mistrust everyone, including God. After all, God knew what was happening. Why didn’t He stop my father? But as long as I held to that way of thinking, there was no healing for me. I learned that I needed to handle my victimization the same way Jesus handled His: I needed to offer forgiveness to my enemy. I needed to love him with God’s love—regardless. “As soon as I asked God to help me love my father, I began to have peace with my past. My father has never admitted what he did to me and has never asked for my forgiveness. He may never face up to his crime. But I no longer hate him. I pity him. I can’t change him; I can only change myself.”

#3 HOW DO I MAKE PEACE WITH SOMEONE I HAVE WRONGED?

Humbly go to the person, admit your mistake, and ask for forgiveness. Its hard, but no one said peace was easy or cheap. If you can restore what you have damaged, you should do it. What happens after that is that person’s responsibility.

#4 I FEEL GUILTY ALL THE TIME, EVEN

WHEN I REPENT. WHY DON’T I HAVE PEACE?

This is an old ruse Satan uses to destroy a Christian’s peace. In spite of being such a frequently used, threadbare trick, Satan keeps on using it because it works so well—especially with new believers. Note Matt’s experience:

“While I was in college, a new Christian, and deeply involved in a campus Bible study group, I became acutely aware of sin in my life,” said Matt. “I was just learning what sin was and how I sinned every day. Realizing how weak I was and how often I gave in to sin made me discouraged. One moment I’d be asking God’s forgiveness, and the next I’d be sinning again. I was depressed and tormented.” One particular day, as Matt walked across campus, he heard a message that brought him peace. “The preacher was making the point that Jesus didn’t come to condemn the world, but through His sacrifice, He came to save us. I thought, Yeah! That’s right! I’m a sinner but God didn’t send Jesus to punish me but to salvage sinful me. All my discouragement just melted away and I had peace after that.” (See John 3:17). Memorize that verse, and when the accuser comes to torment you with your repented sin, remind him— and yourself—of this great promise.

#5 HOW CAN I HAVE PEACE, WHEN THE END OF THE WORLD SEEMS SO NEAR?

Many people in the early church believed the future was so bleak and heaven was so bright, they took their own lives. They failed to see Jesus provides peace in the storm—not from the storm. I, too, believe Christ’s return is imminent. My grandmother, born in the 1880s, also believed Christ would return in her lifetime. The disciples thought that too.. We’re all still waiting. Jesus will return—but we do not know when. However, let urgency prompt you to reach the lost rather than give you anxiety. God will provide for you during any time of testing that may lie ahead whether it’s the end of the world or the end of your world. Let His promise to be with you through all circumstances give you true peace.S

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BY PAM FARREL @PAMFARREL AUTHOR/SPEAKER --------www.Love-Wise.com

The Secret Language of Successful Couples—

PEACE TALKS

“IT IS POSSIBLE TO HAVE A

MARRIAGE THAT IS PEACEFUL, BUT YOU HAVE TO KNOW THE SECRET CODE OF LOVE. Codes are

“

all around us. We have access codes for gates and bank accounts. We have passwords for personal computers, professional workstations, and interactive websites. Codes come in all shapes and sizes and can be very useful in helping us gain confidence and information.

What’s the secret?

In every marriage, there is a line of trust. Love above the line means all is good, sex sizzles, it is easy to make decisions and grace is given readily. But life and love below the line—that is filled with conflict, anger, unforgiveness and frustrations. The key to love is getting a couple above the line! So, what is “the secret code” and how do we use it to get a couple’s love “above the line” of trust? In our

book, The Secret Language of Successful Couples, we explain that there is an access code that can unlock understanding which will lead to peace and unity in a love relationship. You may be asking, “Why do we need a code to figure each other out?” You are very different from one another, and you have different needs at the core of who you are. Eph 5: 22-33 explains these key core needs of a man and a woman:

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit to your husbands as to the

Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to

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CHECKMATE

love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Did you catch it?

in the areas of life that matter most to him (could be work or other endeavors), he will see this as a gesture of helping him succeed. Ladies, if you seek to meet a man’s success need first, he will be easier to live with and easier to love We have found in our own marriage, we can keep love “above the line of trust”, and cultivate peace, if we simply apply the “secret code” with a simple prayer: • Lord, show me how to make him feel more successful. • Lord show me how to make her feel more secure.

The wife must respect her husband, so make him feel successful! Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church”, make her feel safe, like Jesus makes her feel safe. While both men and women might desire success and security, it is the priority by which we desire these traits that matters. The key need of a man is success, the key need a woman is security.

Security is the belief that it is safe to be who I am. So the password that will give a man access

to a workable relationship with his wife is security. A woman wants security in all areas of life: financial, emotional, physical and relational. Because of hormones, a woman’s life is always changing so her greatest desire is to know that despite the changes, is it safe to be who she is today in her relationship with her spouse (or with the man she might be dating). How a man makes a woman feels secure looks different for each woman, but some things are sure wins: telling her she is beautiful, talented, smart then backing up those words with supportive actions. And all women want as a baseline, a safe relational environment free from emotional or physical abuse. If he seeks to meet the security need first, his wife will be easier to live with and easier to love.

Success is the belief that my life is workable.

So the password that gives a woman access to a man’s heart is success. A man wants success in many areas: in his finances, his career, his family, friendships, volunteer work, but he especially wants to be successful in his relationship with his wife (or the woman he might be dating). The number one complaint Bill and I hear in our ministry from men is, “There is just no pleasing the woman!” So ladies, a sure win is to let your man KNOW what makes you happy, and express appreciation with words and actions. Also, if you help him look good

We believe God, through His Spirit, is the best “decoder” of your mate, because God created him or her! So the direction the Spirit gives will help decode our mate and help us all find love “above the line of trust”. We know God wants to answer prayers like this one because He commands us to love each other in very different yet specific ways in Eph. 5. He also tells us to “Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and mighty things that you do not know” (Jer 33:3)

This is one “secret” God wants us to share!

Enrich your relationship by simply loving in accordance to the way God uniquely designed each gender and invite God’s Spirit to lead you by uttering the prayer that can unlock love, “Lord, show me what to say. Lord, show me what to do.” Then simply say it and do it! God wants you to have peace in your relationships because your love will then shine as a bright light into a dark world desperately looking for peace and authentic love. S

STRA ROAD TO

FINANCIA “MY STOMACH CHURNED.

THE VERY IDEA OF TALKING ABOUT HOW MUCH WE OWED CREATED ANXIETY.

“

My husband and I sat down at the table with the pile of bills in front us. We were going to do the unthinkable—tally the total amount of debt we had. Between the electric getting shut off, final notices in the mail and going to cash advance shops in order to have groceries, it was time to do something about our debt. It didn’t make sense. We finally had good jobs, great salaries and wanted to start making plans for our future. The problem was no matter how hard we tried, we couldn’t seem to get ahead. We constantly robbed Peter to pay Paul, there was no such thing as peace when we put our paychecks in the bank. As we went through the list, it felt like stepping on the scale to find out how much weight I had put on during the holiday season of fruit cake and Christmas cookies. As our list grew, I knew we needed to go on a debt diet. $32,000 was our total amount of credit card debt minus our mortgage, car payment and student loans. We needed to make a plan before our future was ruined any worse than what it was.

BY HEATHER RIGGLEMAN @HEATHERRIGG AUTHOR/SPEAKER ---------

heatherriggleman.com

Does this sound like you? Do you have a good income but are stuck knee-deep in debt? Or maybe a job change or medical emergency has left you without any breathing room. Here are 6 nitty gritty tips to give you a game plan and start regaining your financial figure. 1.Tally the Total. A critical part of financial peace is getting the overall picture of what you owe. This means

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APPED MYWINDY O

PEACE

creating a list of all your outstanding debts on one piece of paper. When you add up your debts you need to know more than just what you owe and your monthly payment. You will want to include the interest rates and fees for each debt. This will give you a clear picture and show you what to eliminate first. To do this, you’ll need to set aside one to three hours and use debt summary worksheets like they provide through Crown Financial where you can download and print everything you need to create a game plan.

2. Track Your Expenses. Once you know how much debt you need to lose, the next step is to track your spending. Like counting calories, it’s hard to figure out where you’re gaining all those extra pounds unless you become aware of your spending habits. For 30 days track every penny. This means writing down expenses like your morning latte, your child’s allowance, fast food, and those 25 cent sodas. This will give you a clear picture of where your money is going , what you can eliminate and how to categorize spending once you create a budget. 3. Build the Budget. There is an old saying in the financial world: If you fail to plan, you plan to fail. This advice applies to everyone, including family households. Crown Financial offers a Budget Analysis form to help you develop and establish a budget. This form is a place to list all your revenue and record your expenses. This will give you a better idea of what money is coming in and how you can reduce money going out. 4. Cut & Save. Once you know the bottom line for all your expenses, it’s time to cut out unnecessary expenses. Take a close look at each expense and decide if it’s a want or need. For example, a need is a new pair of shoes when the soles are falling off, a want is high lights for your summer hairdo. Ask yourself where you can truly cut expenses. Take a close look at each category like entertainment, cell phone, groceries and allocate a specific amount to go into each category.

5. Get Saving. Once your budget and categories have been established, start spending in cash. Breaking a $100, $50, or even a $20 dollar bill is much harder to do than swiping your debit card. This helps you stick to your budget and put money in savings. When cash is left over from a category, you have two options; apply towards debt or put it into savings towards a specific item like tires for the car. If you prefer digital tracking for your money, companies like Capital 360 allow you to open as many savings accounts as you wish. This allows you to put money in accounts designated for tithes and donations, repairs, down payment for a home, emergency expenses, etc. 6. Negotiate. Now that you’ve studied your spending habits, established a budget and created a savings plan, it’s time to fight dirty with the credit card companies. Because millions of people file bankruptcy every year, credit card companies are losing money too. Companies are willing to establish a repayment plan, reduce fees and help you pay off what you owe. Once you’ve established a repayment plan, you can request the credit card company to notify credit unions of your payments in order to rebuild your credit. Some credit card companies are willing to settle for a certain amount of the card you owe. You might also be able to find a local reputable Community Credit Counseling Service that will help you with this process. These are just the first 6 steps in a long windy road to financial peace. You’ll find more in the next issue of LH. It definitely didn’t happen overnight, however, today we are debt free minus mortgage and car payments. As a woman in leadership, a healthy financial history is a legacy I want to leave my co-workers, those I mentor, and my children. It begins with allowing God control of everything, knowing He provides for all our needs. S

FROM HOME TO STAGE THESE WOMEN ARTISTS KNOW THEIR PEACE BEYOND THE SPOTLIGHT...

BEHIND THE SCENES LIKE ‘BLANCA’ ON FACEBOOK.

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WHEN IT COMES TO STEPPING OUT IN FAITH, BLANCA SHAKES THE GROUND. AS MULTIPLE-AWARDING WINNING POWERHOUSE VOCALIST FORMERLY OF GROUP 1 CREW, BLANCA TALKS TO LEADING HEARTS MAGAZINE ABOUT THE STORY BEHIND HER SINGLE, “WHO I AM.” THE SONG IS NOT ONLY THE TITLE CUT, BUT EMBODIES THE JOURNEY AS THE SINGER AND NEW MOM HAS EMBRACED HER IDENTITY AS SHE MADE THE LEAP TO SOLO ARTIST. THIS JOURNEY MARKS THE FOOTPRINT FOR EVERY WOMAN WHO DARES TO HER IDENTITY IN CHRIST AS WELL AS PEACE IN WHAT HE’S CALLED HER TO DO.

My Name is Blanca. This is who I am... I remember before I left Group One Crew having conversations with my husband about being own my own. I was overly afraid, and fearful because I felt like that my identity was in the Group and its success. But then there was the thought, “ just be you.” As a solo artist through the good and the bad, sometimes you feel you have no one else to lean on. The truth was I was afraid of being me. It was stretching process, but God was showing me, “I need you to be you.”

BY HEATHER RIGGLEMAN @HEATHERRIGG AUTHOR/SPEAKER ---------

heatherriggleman.com

and anxiety about the future would get the best of me. But the birth of my son, London, was such an eye opener for me. I learned to lift up every moment to the Lord because when you take so much time to worry, you miss out on the beauty of life.

Of Trust, Especially When God Is Calling You to Something... Those times you just know it and you feel it in your heart. The trouble is He never just shows us the full picture.

I May Not be the Typical Mom...

And, It Just Takes that One Step of Faith...

I’ve always felt that it was moms who provided the love and care for a family. There were times when I struggled with this because I felt like I wasn’t doing my job and missing out because my role as a mom was reversed. My husband has been so supportive and I know the Lord has given me grace, strength and peace to do this. This is what He called me to.

Then He show’s that next step to you. At then again you take another step, and another in faith for God to show you. Take the risk, take the next step. It’s been one of the best decisions of my life.

Because I am Yours ...

But I Still Struggle With Typical Girl Stuff... I am reading a book by Brene Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection. Its being very inspiring to realize that I don’t have to please anyone but to love myself. We drive ourselves crazy about the way that we look, how we are presented. We want to please people. It’s a constant choice to let all those things go. But the reality is we need to say, Lord I am enough in you. I am just going to show people the real me. without them even knowing.”

Like Pushing Worry Aside to Enjoy the Sweet Spots... Before I became a mom, was always looking ahead, worry

My Name is Blanca ... I Know Who I Am.

www.officialblanca.com

- continued on p. 22-

LIKE ‘ELLIE HOLCOMB’ ON FACEBOOK.

BY JENN TAYLOR @JENNTAYLOR417 PROFILE CONTRIBUTOR ---------

ellie holcomb 2

2014 CCM NEW ARTIST OF THE YEAR

I’ve seen music be balm for the weary soul in my life -- -- --in -- --the -- --lives -- -- -- -of -- -- --loved -- -- -- --ones, -- -- -- and -- -- -- I’m -- -- --so-- --hon-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -{20.} - -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --and - --my ored to be able to somehow contribute to that body of I AM CONSTANTLY ASKING work.”

“

THE LORD, ‘WHAT ON EARTH AM I DOING HERE? I’m so grateful for

the opportunities I’ve been given, but I almost always feel ill-equipped and under-qualified to walk through all the doors He’s opened for me.” Ellie’s newest project, As Sure as the Sun, tells beautiful ballads that relate, speak of joys and trials, and it also includes songs inspired by scripture. In fact, The Valley was written to minister to her loved ones who have suffered with depression. “Music has a way of speaking to places and to pain that we have not even named yet.

I am so grateful for the way songs have carried me through some of my darkest seasons, speaking truth to pain and doubt in such a beautiful and comforting way,” Ellie says. “I think songs can become prayers for us when we don’t know how or what to pray.

In her busy life, Ellie keeps her peace with lots of prayer. “I am just asking Jesus for help throughout the day, but I’ve discovered that I’m best off as a mom, as a wife, as a friend, and as an artist, when I remember first that I am His beloved daughter. The best way for me to remember this truth is to spend time in His word and in intentional prayer, which usually means I’m writing something down.” Ellie and husband Drew are also expecting baby number 2 this month. During those crazy times she seeks the peace found in Hosea 6:3, “Let us acknowledge the Lord, let us press on to acknowledge Him, for as surely as the sun rises, He will appear. He will come to us like the winter rains, like the spring rains that water the earth.” As well as, Psalm 73:26,

“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” www.ellieholcomb.com

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LIKE ‘FIREFLIGHT’ ON FACEBOOK.

“WE HAD A GREAT RELATIONSHIP WITH OUR LABEL FOR 8 YEARS, BUT WE WERE NOT GOING IN THE SAME DIRECTION AS THE OTHER ARTISTS, says

”

Fireflight bassist Wendy Drennen (pictured on right).

That moment jumpstarted the renewal process leading the 4-veteran members of Fireflight (which includes Wendy’s husband Glenn and drummer Adam McMillion) to create their new project, INNOVA, which released this month. However for the first time in 15 years the band was reliant on fan support through an online funding site to make it through this season that God was calling them to. “This was not just the making of a music project,” says Wendy. “Just like all ministries we have families and this is our livelihood. So just being obedient to this process took a tremendous amount of faith.”

3 THE GIRLS OF

The band’s guitarist Justin Cox stepped down to spend more time with his growning family. Then Dawn Michele, lead vocalist (pictured on left), needed extra flexibility so she could rest and transition to be a new mom. “We even shot music video for “Alive,” the album single, from her neck up,” says Wendy. “Naturally toward the end of Dawn’s pregnancy, touring was limited in this process, and that’s a big part of what bands do to generate income. Day-by-day I remember praying for peace, to know that God was going to provide, because this is what He wanted us to do. And sometimes we were down to the wire. But He knew and He always provided. This has been more than a production process this has been a faith-building process and God has taught us so much in it.” S www.fireflightrocks.com —Amber Weigand-Buckley, LH editor

fireflight

empowering each BY EDNA ELLISON @DREDNAELLISON AUTHOR/SPEAKER www.EdnaEllison.com

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TAKE A MOMENT. JUST A MOMENT.

MADISON AND CAROLINE WERE SLUMPED IN EGG CHAIRS IN THE YOUTH HALL JUST BEFORE THE WOMEN’S MINISTRY PLANNING MEETING. I DON’T GET IT, Madison said. “I love God. I know I’m

“

a Christian. I lead the youth and this one women’s group. I have a passion for making the world a better place. . . Why am I not happy?

This morning I yelled at Jack, snapped at the kids, and almost kicked the cat! For no reason. I have every reason to be content with my life. I just don’t get it. What was I thinking?” “I don’t get it totally either, Madison, but maybe you weren’t thinking; you were feeling!”

Madison turned her chair around. “What’s the difference?” “Sometimes we can think until our head hurts from the inside out, but we don’t deal with our feelings. Were you angry this morning?” “No more than usual, I guess. Why do you want to know that?” “Well, sometimes we need our friends to help us accept who we are as we plan together. All of us have gifts and personalities to give a varied perspective of the world and the work we do here at Central Church. We need thinkers and feelers on our planning team. It takes all of us to change the world.” “Yeah, I want to make a difference as we work with troubled women, but I guess some of us—even leaders—are just not as relaxed or content as others.” “Ever wonder if you need a counselor?”

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IN THE LEAD

S h other

Discussion Starters Read and discuss the following with your small group: When Jesus sent 72 Christians out two-by-two as evangelists, he told them to look for a person of peace in each town (Luke 10:5-7). Who among your leadership is such a peacemaker? Are you a Person of Peace? Jesus said, “Your peace will rest on him” (v. 6). How do you think the peace of your leadership team rests on other Christians? Jesus said, “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest” (mark 6:31). Make sure every planning team begins with a devotion time in a quiet place and that His peace overflows from your hearts as you share that contentment with others. Use the quiz below in your discussion of today’s topic Which are you? (Circle all that apply)

“You’re a counselor, Caroline. Why do I need anyone else?” They both laughed.

A do-er A talker A thinker A feeler A hider A giggler A mover A plodder A frowner A smiler An aggressor A repressor An oppressor A confessor [Do this one instantly and often!]

Caroline paused and leaned forward. “I was thinking of another Counselor: The Holy Spirit. The Bible calls Him the ‘Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace’ (Isaiah 9:6). He’s also called our Comforter. When we spend more time with Him, He encourages us and fills us with a peaceful contentment and joy.” “Yes, I remember another verse I memorized as a child. Let me think. . . Jesus said: ‘I will ask the Father and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever—the Spirit of truth’” (John 14:16-17). “Wow,” said Caroline. “Now you are counseling me!” She stretched back in her chair. “We do need time with Him. And it takes only a moment. Just a moment to feel the presence of the Holy Spirit who gives us comfort and contentment. Holy Spirit, please join us, touch us, comfort us, guide us, and give us deep peace in our planning meeting. Amen. [Voices interrupt the prayer.] C’mon, let’s go, Madison! I hear the rest of our team coming up the hallway!” Spirit’s power. Remember, above all, lead them to trust God as the ultimate leader. S

1. How does each of the identity labels above make you feel? 2. How can you (for yourself or others) accept one or two of the labels and embrace them? 3. How do you think the Holy Spirit leads you in sev eral of these identities? 4. Why do you think God allowed some people from all these types to serve God in your church? 5. How can you as a diverse group bring comfort and peace to others? 6. A private question to ponder on the way home: Am I a Person of Peace?

—EDNA ELLISON

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“THIS BOOK WILL CHANGE THE WAY YOU THINK ABOUT DOING GOD’S WORK IN THIS WORLD...” —CAROL KENT

AWARD-WINNING AUTHOR & SPEAKER

ENCOURAGEMENT FROM LISA TROYER—

AVAILABLE NOW! WWW.LISATROYER.COM

DOWNLOAD YOUR FREE COPY @

HTTP://ISSUU.COM/LISATROYER/DOCS/A_PLACE_TO_BELONG_MANUSCRIPT

JUST 18 SUMMERS

BY MICHELLE S. COX @MICHELLEINSPIRE AUTHOR/SPEAKER www.Just18Summers.com

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HARMONY IN THE BALACE “THE MERRIAM-WEBSTER

DICTIONARY DESCRIBES PEACE AS “A STATE OF TRANQUILITY OR QUIET” AND “HARMONY IN PERSONAL RELATIONS. God

“

loaned us three sons. Quietness wasn’t one of their gifts. They sounded like elephants as they tromped up and down the stairs, and it often seemed like the ceiling would collapse as they played with their brothers and friends. When one of their siblings did something to them or messed with their stuff, it wasn’t a gentle “Mama” when they called for me, it was a bellowed, “MAMA! ___________ broke my favorite game!”

They often fought about stupid stuff, like in the car one morning when two of the boys had a long argument about who had the biggest nose holes.

They also had a heated discussion about who was going to sleep in the top bunk. Did I mention we didn’t own bunk beds—and weren’t planning on buying any? Yes, there were days when I hid in the bathroom just to get a few minutes of peace and quiet. Can any of you relate? Add to that other stresses in our lives like finances, health, and problems at work or home, and it’s easy to lose the peace from our hearts. These are great times to lean on God’s promises: The LORD will give strength unto his people; the LORD will bless his people with peace. Psalm 29:11 And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7 Could you use some peace today? I think the dictionary should really say, “Just look to Jesus.” S

5ways to RECLAIM YOUR SERENE SPACE

BY DR. SAUNDRA DALTON-SMITH @DRDALTONSMITH PHYSICIAN/AUTHOR/SPEAKER www.IChooseMyBestLife.com

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HEALTH TRACKS

“LIFE IS MADE FULLER WHEN

IT IS LIVED IN A STATE OF SERENITY. IT’S AN UNFORTUNATE REALITY, BUT THIS PLACE OF PEACE IS CONSTANTLY UNDER ATTACK. Busy schedules and

“

family obligations are daily vying for your attention. The only way to maintain a peaceful spirit is to make it your default mood. Resist the temptation to be a victim to your momentary reactions to everyday ups and downs. Pull away during those times you feel overwhelmed and incorporate a few of these simple life hacks. They will enable you to reclaim your serene space—where peace abides.

1. Practice Peace in Motion—Walking is a great way to get rid of the tension which can build up each day. As little as 30 minutes of moderate paced walking will improve blood flow all over your body and give you an emotional boost from the endorphins released. You will instantly feel a sense of peacefulness as your body cools down from the exertion and as your muscles release their build-up of lactic acid. 2. Blend Up a Peaceful Concoction—Does going to the beach or the pool make you want a frozen beverage like a virgin daiquiri or Pina Colada? The psychological connections between water and peace are wonderful and that relaxing feeling of sip on a frozen blended drink is something you can incorporate into any stressful day. I suggest the following healthy versions full of ingredients which have been shown to increase a peaceful mood. Peace Colada Smoothie (serves 1) 1 ¼ cups fresh pineapple chunks ¼ cup light coconut milk ¼ cup sweetened flaked coconut ½ tablespoon honey ½ cup ice cubes Blend until smooth and enjoy

1 large lemon or lime, squeezed 1 fresh banana Blend until smooth and share 3. Focus on the Peacemaker — Whatever you focus on in life becomes the gateway through which your perspective originates. If you focus on your battles, you will become discouraged and filled with hopelessness when your battles seems too much to bare. But if you choose to focus instead on the One who fights for you, you will find yourself feeling strengthened and empowered to keep believing in anticipation of peace that goes beyond all reasoning. 4. Make Peace With Yourself—While you may fear criticisms from others, your harshest critic may be the one staring back at you in the mirror. Nothing disrupts inner peace like internal negative self-talk, so pay attention to your thought patterns and notice when your inner critic rears up. Be quick to practice self-compassion and allow yourself the same grace you extend to others. 5. Pray Peace-filled Scriptures— Prayer can be difficult when you God seems far away and you cannot feel His presence. When you don’t know what to pray, pray God’s word. Praying the scriptures is a powerful way to transform your prayer life. Below is a sample prayer using four peace-filled scripture references.

Peace Prayer

Father, I thank you for Your peace You’ve given me. Do not let my heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. In this world I will have problems, but I will never be without hope because You have overcome the world. You will keep me in perfect peace, while my mind is stayed on You, because I trust in You. So I will be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let my requests be made known to You.

S Berry Peaceful Chiller (serves 2) I gratefully receive Your peace which 2 1/4 cups frozen berries surpasses all understanding and know it ½ cup water will guard my heart and mind through 1 tablespoon honey Christ Jesus. Amen. S -------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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BY KATHY COLLARD MILLER @KATHYCMILLER AUTHOR/SPEAKER

IN THE SPOT

www.KathyCollardMiller.com

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7 BLOCKS TO GREAT INTERVIEWING

“ AS YOU DEVELOP AS A WRIT-

ING PROFESSIONAL YOU’LL EVENTUALLY NEED TO CONDUCT AN INTERVIEW TO COLLECT MATERIAL FOR A PROJECT. Here are several

“

blocks to good interviewing that you’ll want to avoid.

1. Asking mundane questions that need more detail but generate a “Yes” or “No” answer. 2. Asking questions with your own preconceived answers or attitudes in the question. Baseball great Lou Brock said: “Some of the media ask questions that are not really questions. They’ve already written the answers in their minds and what they want from me is reassurance.”

4. Having no angle in mind for the article. If we don’t have any direction, we may cover too much and the article may be vague. 5. Not asking for anecdotes/stories. Anecdotes are powerful tools that show the essence of a person. Ask things like: “Tell me a time in your life when you experienced this.” 6. Merely asking questions rather than carrying on a conversation. The best interviewers enter into a dialogue back and forth. You can share a little about own life but only to spur conversation. 7. Fail to ask follow up questions. In order to make the interview more like a dialog rather than just asking questions, use follow-up questions based on the answers that are given.

You can use what you gain from interviews as a complete article, or an anecdote within a book or 3. Having an imbalance between adoring fan and critarticle, or a quote within an article or book. Of course, ical spirit. Yes, we must be truly interested as a fan but be sure to gain written permission from the interviewed if we are starry-eyed, we may not be assertive in clarifyperson before you use within a different published ing unclear ideas. medium. S {30.} - -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --

— t h g u o h t r o f d foo LIFEBYTES

A GIFT OF CONTENMENT “MY MUM WAS A WORLD WAR

II WAR BRIDE FROM ENGLAND. AFTER THE WAR, WE LEFT ENGLAND AND CAME TO AMERICA TO JOIN MY FATHER WHO SERVED IN THE US ARMY IN EUROPE. Life was rather lonely for my

“ Mum on our ranch on the plains of South Dakota.

Only recently have I had some understanding of her loneliness and homesickness as she assimilated into a new way of life. She told me many stories about the courage and strength she needed to face the many challenges as she began her new life, far away from her home in England. But, through it all, she possessed a peace and a stamina that could only have been the result of her faith in Christ. She never lost her love for England, but made the best of every situation in America, and left a legacy of a full, happy, and contented life. She often quoted John 16:33 “These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world” (NIV). One of her many gifts was hospitality. Anyone who came to our home was offered a cup of tea and some of her homemade cakes or cookies. She loved to bake and brought many recipes with her from England. Probably my favorites were her Victoria Sponge Cake and Scottish Shortbread Cookies. I have many of her teacups and teapots, and use them often when having guests for afternoon tea. I can almost hear her encouraging me in her lovely English accent, “Don’t forget to have

BY PENELOPE CARLEVATO @TEATIMEPEN AUTHOR/SPEAKER www.PenelopesTeaTime.com

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a blessing before your tea.” Her English heritage is a treasured gift to me, but the greatest gift is her Christian legacy.

Victoria Sponge Cake

1 cup butter, room temperature 1 cup sugar 4 eggs, beaten 2 cups self-rising flour, sifted Filling: 1 cup of any kind of Jam, Preserves, or Lemon Curd.1 cup heavy whipping cream, whipped Preheat oven to 375º F. Grease and line with parchment paper two 8-inch round cake tins. Cream butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add eggs and mix well. Fold in the flour and mix well. Divide the batter between the two pans and smooth the top of the batter for evenness. Bake for 20 to 25 minutes until risen and brown. The cakes should spring back when gently touched in the middle. Cool in pans for 5 minutes, then turn out onto a wire rack to continue cooling. Place one layer onto a serving plate, top side down and sandwich bottoms of cake together with the preserves or lemon curd and the whipping cream. Sprinkle the top of the cake with powdered sugar and decorate with fresh flowers. (Viola’s are especially pretty on this cake.) Serve with you favorite pot of tea.S

— p u g n i shap LIFEBYTES

BY ANGELA BREIDENBACH @ANGBREIDENBACH AUTHOR/COACH/SPEAKER www.AngelaBreidenbach.com

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WORKING MY PEACE OUT

“WE ALL DEAL WITH JUGGLING

THE STRESS OF WORK, FAMILY, AND COMMITMENTS. Somehow re-

“

and thickening waist to the load she’s carrying … Oh, and two months ago she promised to help with the kids’ school carnival. Please repeat this mantra—Keep going, girl, you can do it!.

laxation slowly slips from our grasp while tension locks both brain and body. The schedule fills up with needs until even finding time for a meal is an ordeal.

Caught in the cyclone of busy, we all feel leaving the car on the highway, and running off to a solitary place in the woods. But there really is an exercise/peace connection.

What do you mean eat a healthy meal and get a good night’s sleep? Who has the time? Where’s peace when the commotion of leadership and life get in the way of what should be a simple, regular schedule? Instead, we simply live in constant chaos while mentally and spiritually it feels like a typhoon washed away the ability to think clearly, rationally, and strategically.

It’s like walking through a dark house when the power is out. Arms extended, we feel our way through the darkness slowly. Eventually we get to where we’re going, but at a half-speed and probably a stubbed toe. The power comes back on and it’s easy to zip across the living room without thinking and arrive with a few less bruises.

Tips from the pros tell women to work smarter, faster, and organize. They say to delegate, ask for help, and block out important events or appointments as soon as you know them. All great advice—when we use it. However, exhaustion and frustration keep deep lines etched in her forehead as she’s popping acetaminophen and caffeine like a major stockholder in headache and fatigue. Along comes the newest workout fad. Doesn’t matter what or who. One more crazy demand to look better. A way to dream of the perfect figure or get back in those skinny clothes. Right? Add the guilt of a spreading rear

Challenge: Schedule 30-minutes a day, five to six days a week, for one month. Pay attention to your energy and productivity levels from day one. How overwhelmed are you? Are you showing irritability to family, friends, and co-workers? Notice how many days in that month you felt better and managed your schedule better. Did you achieve more? How was your irritation meter on days you worked out? One month later, note the higher production rate and sense of achievement. It doesn’t seem like adding to a busy schedule should raise productivity, but it does. Great ideas, time management and peace are benefits people who exercise every day enjoy. Why not be a woman who cares enough about the people under her care that she makes sure to build a strong body and sound mind? That woman is a much more creative, productive and effective leader because she has found a method to manage the mayhem. Tip: Spend a few minutes imagining what you’ll feel like in one month. On days you are tempted to skip the workout, bring that image back into your mind. Keep that peaceful woman’s image you want to become available to encourage the action to get you there. S

— e m i t f o r e t t a am LIFEBYTES

6 HEARTFUL INVESTMENT PLANS

BY KAREN WHITING @KARENHWHITING AUTHOR/SPEAKER www.KarenWhiting.com

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and interests. Look for positive in people. This doesn’t mean you agree with sinful choices, but that you extend love and acceptance.

“ONE OF THE WISEST USES OF

TIME IS INVESTING IN THE PEOPLE WE CARE ABOUT TO CULTIVATE THEIR CONTENTMENT. We

“

do this when we help meet each person’s six basic needs to feel loved and valued. It only takes a few minutes of communicating daily to fill someone’s heart. Reflect on the needs and reach out to touch someone with words. 1. Attention—Nothing says I love you like spending time with a person, especially if you’re mindful and really listen. Eliminate distractions by turning off technology and your cell phone sound. Look the individual in the eye and focus on the words, expressions, and body language. Respond appropriately with empathy and enthusiasm. Find common interests you share and schedule time to enjoy the activities together. See if you recall the conversation later that day and if you can identify the person’s needs, mood and emotional state. 2. Acceptance—When you accept a person, faults and talents, it sends a message that says, “I belong and I fit in this relationship.” Accept the person and understand their unique gifts

3. Approval—Using words and actions to show approval sends the message that the person matters and you respect their efforts. Reinforce your approval with praise for the person’s good ideas and enthusiasm. Support the person’s interests and encourage their abilities. Acknowledge his or her contributions. Be generous with sincere compliments. 4. Affection—People can be starved for expressions of affection, hugs, and the touch of a handshake, high-five, or pat on the back. The warmth of letting someone feel cherished includes smiles that come from your heart and show in your twinkling eyes, little gifts, and words that reflect you care about person’s feelings. 5. Affirmation—When we validate a person’s dreams and goals we reinforce our faith that the person can reach those aspirations. Step back enough to really notice the person’s attitude, style and spirit. Applaud success and show interest in the individual’s choices and life— that may be a main career or passionate hobby. Suggest ways these talents and passions can be used to benefit others. 6. Assurance—In a world full of terrorism and life struggle, people need to feel safe. Be loyal and keep confidences so individuals feel safe conversing with you and discussing difficulties and hard choices. Pray together over problems and offer the assurance of faith in Christ for eternal safety. You’ll be an A+ friend or loved one when you work at filling the hearts of others. You will find it helps your level of contentment also, as you focus on relationships more than material goods. S

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FROM THE HEART

“YOU WILL KEEP IN PERFECT PEACE ALL WHO TRUST IN YOU, ALL WHOSE THOUGHTS ARE FIXED ON YOU!“ —ISAIAH 26: 3-4. NIV

EMBRACING THE SPIRIT OF PEACE

What would happen if we would quit performing and just sit at the feet of Jesus? Would we find ourselves anxious, discontented or critical? No, where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is peace. So, how does that translate in a hectic, challenging, and often, spiritually antagonistic world? Isaiah answers us simplistically and directly. Inward and outward peace are those sometime elusive ‘knowings’ that fail to manifest in our spirit when we are living, doing and striving in our own strength. Sometimes the pursuits are temporal, sometimes we deem them eternal. However, if the Lord is not our focus in any area of life, we will not have peace. We will not extend peace and our ‘peace-making’ abilities will be nonexistent. A couple of years ago, I co-wrote a lyric with my friends Grace and Dawn...we titled it, “There Is Nothing.” The chorus is drawn from Romans 8, but Isaiah’s instruction made the first verse... There are many shades of darkness and levels of sadness but hope remains the same Perfect peace remains forever when my eyes are fixed on You and hope remains the same ... The anointing that a peacemaker carries is believing that ALL things are ‘being worked’ together for His purposeful good, fashioned in the loving hands of our Heavenly Father—even during the arduous process of being ‘clay in the Potter’s hand’. The sorrows of anxious moments can be transformed in the joy that comes with the new mercies that Abba Father provides each and every morning. The manifestation of God’s perfect peace. So, how well are you doing with ‘making your own peace’? For any of us who have the privilege of speaking truth to a small group of a few, or a large group of thousands, how often have we talked about peace? Believed every word we were sharing on peace with God; peace with others, but felt that aching hollowness that comes with intellectually and theologically knowing the truth, but not ‘knowing’ it for ourselves? Not knowing it in the depths of soul.

God understands when we are going through the valley of fear, regret or disappointment. God understands when we look in the mirror, and then into His face, and ask the question, ‘Lord, why did I do that?’; ‘Lord, what did I do that has brought this brokenness into my life?’—sometimes there are no clear answers for the cause. Sin is simply ‘missing the mark of God’s perfection’, and we and those around us are ‘Mark Missers’…… and ‘Peace Forfeiters’. The trouble is, even in the cases when the Holy Spirit has revealed the exceedingly specific answer to us, inviting us to receive the forgiveness that Jesus suffered to avail, we wrestle with the enemy as the guilt, shame and confusion of a fallen world, and our fallen contribution to it, attempts to keep us ‘peace-less’—stealing like the thief that he is, the peace that passes all human understanding. Blessed are the peacemakers—and if we are to follow the greatest commandments— loving God with all of our heart, soul, mind and strength….and our neighbor as ourselves, then a heart where there is no peace will not be able to share the confident assurance of the availability of peace with God. Not only unto salvation, but in the dailyness of life. If it’s covered by the Blood of Jesus—we are at peace. We can then extend the peace with which we are comforted by God. When Paul wrote his letter we know as Second Corinthians, he began the epistle by acknowledging that when we know the comfort of God, it is for the purpose of comforting others, and in any situation. That sounds like peacemaking to me. S

BY LISA TROYER @LISATROYER AUTHOR/RADIO HOST/SPEAKER www.lisatroyer.com

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“Packed with prayer and promises, this book will free you to experience the POWER of GOD’S PEACE.” —LYSA LYSA TERKEURST TERKEURST, New York Times bestselling author of Unglued and president of Proverbs 31 Ministries

he true remedy to stress, Linda Evans Shepherd says, is prayer. In this inspiring book, she shows you how to recognize God’s continual presence in your life and yield your troubles to the Prince of Peace. Through captivating stories, explorations of fascinating biblical characters, and examples of deeperthan-ever prayers, she brings within your grasp the peace that passes understanding. If you are overwhelmed by all of the urgent demands on your time, this book is your lifeline to true peace.

Also Available from LINDA EVANS SHEPHERD

www.StressPrayers.com

{34.} - -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -AVAILABLE WHEREVER BOOKS ARE SOLD ALSO AVAILABLE IN e BOOK FORMAT

PRAYER CIRCLE

BY LINDA EVANS SHEPHERD @LINDASHEPHERD PUBLISHER www.GoToPray.com

---------

WARRIOR PRAYERS

“IT HURT SO DEEPLY. .“

Sure there are battles of all sorts, but our battles are easily won when we:

Sure, I asked God to restore our friendship with peace, but I also did something a lot of Christians are afraid to do. I called out to the enemy of my soul; the very one who comes to steal, kill and destroy, so to push him out of the situation.

1. Recognize that we have an enemy. 2. Become wise to spirits such as strife, lies, and confusion when they begin to operate against us or our loved ones. 3. Close all doors to attacks with tools such as God’s love, forgiveness, truth and joy. 4. Pray truth, freedom and forgiveness over the people involved in these difficulties. 5. Invoke the power of the name and the blood of Jesus as we cancel all assignments of the enemy against us. 6. Praise God that our victory is in Him.

Sonja, one of my dearest friends, had heard a terrible lie about me, and believed it. She wouldn’t take my calls. I couldn’t address her misperception or even apologize. All I could do was pray.

“Enemy,” I told him, “I see your handiwork here and I cancel your lies that my dear friend believes about me in the power and authority of the name and the blood of Jesus. Instead of lies, I call forth God’s spirit of truth and peace.” Days, weeks, and months went by and there was no change. Yet I continued in my prayer and warfare. Then one day, months after the original miscommunication, the phone rang. My friend Sonja gushed, “I now know what I believed about you isn’t true. I’m so sorry I pushed you away. Please forgive me!” I replied, “Of course! I love you and I am so sorry for the pain you carried because of the misperception. I’m so glad to be your friend.” Why would I forgive Sonja for believing a lie about me? I did so because forgiveness breaks the enemy’s strategies against us. But so does praise. How I rejoiced that the enemy’s power was no match for the power and the blood of Jesus. (Rev. 12:11)

Believe it or not Sonja is not the first or only person who has ever believed a lie about me. But each time I’ve faced this type of warfare, God has given me victory. So if you need to fight for peace, try this battle cry: Dear Lord, Thank you that greater is He that is in me than he that is in the world. So in your power and authority, I declare victory over the enemy; the spirit of lies, strife, and confusion harassing me or my loved ones. I replace these spirits with your love, peace, forgiveness, truth and joy. I cancel all the assignments of these unclean spirits over me and my loved ones -- in the power and authority of the name and the blood of Jesus. I praise you Lord that the enemy is defeated. In Jesus’s name, Amen S

To receive a free report called Pray Toolbox filled with warfare prayers to pray over you and your loved ones, visit Linda at www.GotToPray.com -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --{37.}

BY RHONDA RHEA @RHONDARHEA HUMOR COLUMNIST

www.RhondaRhea.com

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BELLY LAUGHS

TWO PODS IN A PEA (BUT LOVING ANYWAY)

“ACCORDING TO THE

SAMMY-CAT, THERE’S NO CONTAINER THAT’S NOT WORTH SITTING IN. If there’s a bag, box, bowl, bin,

“ basin or bucket that he can reach, there’s an under-

stood “Dibs!” from Sammy as he slowly fills the container with himself. I had a rectangular basket sitting out the other day and Sammy poured himself inside it—well, poured most of himself inside it—and when I looked over, all I could see was a loaf of Sammy. So weird. Incidentally, Sammy has a thing about his personal space. We’re all supposed to know never to invade it. Then there’s LuLu. She welcomes herself into everyone’s space. Plus, she could easily be the perfect poster pup for canine ADHD. Sammy’s worst nightmare. Just a bit ago she climbed into a chair, right up in Sammy’s cat-grill. Sammy long ago perfected the facial expression of utter disgust. It’s full-on right now. They’re like two pods in a pea.

The funny thing is, LuLu doesn’t even know that. She seems pretty convinced they’re best friends. How many times has she taken her ball and dropped it in front of Sammy? She waits expectantly every time. It doesn’t even matter how many times I say to her, “LuLu, seriously. When has Sammy ever played ball with you? Ever?” As followers of Christ, though, it no doubt pleases our heavenly Father when we’re a little less “Sammy” and a little more “LuLu.” In some ways, anyway. It’s good when we stop worrying and stewing about our own personal space, can that look of disgust, get out of our comfort zones and get to work for the Kingdom. There’s too much at stake to get sidetracked by personality differences or petty aggravations. Fighting like cats and dogs? It should never happen. Paul said in Philippians 1:27, “Just one thing: Live your life in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ. Then, whether I come and see you or am absent, I will hear about you that you are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind, working side by side for the faith that comes from the gospel,” (HCSB). No “loafing”—let’s live worthy of this gospel and work side by side for the faith. No fussing. No fur flying. Loving each other and loving a lost world into the Kingdom. Is it easy to love people who are getting on your last nerve? Sammy would answer with a hiss. I, too, freely admit that it is not easy, it’s downright impossible. The moment we recognize we can’t do it and we begin to depend solely on the God who can, that’s the moment love happens in a new way. Because the Lord Himself is the one who makes it happen. “If anyone serves, it should be from the strength God provides, so that God may be glorified through Jesus Christ in everything,” (1 Peter 4:11, HCSB). It’s crystal clear in 1 John 4:7, “let us love one another, because love is from God.” And that makes it right— and safe—for me to welcome you into my personal space. So come on over. Let’s break bread together. And no, that has nothing to do with any kind of cat-loaf. S

REVIEWS

BOOK REVIEWS UNDIVIDED by Patricia and Alana Raybon “I was riveted to the end. As fresh as this evening’s news...it’s going to make a huge impact,” says Novelist and Biographer Jerry B. Jenkins, in his review of the new book by Patricia and Alana Raybon, Undivided : A Muslim Daughter, Her Christian Mother, And Their Path to Peace. Written with rare honesty and striking transparency, Undivided opens a door on the lives of an American Islamic convert, Alana Raybon, a dedicated educator, and her devout Christian mother, Patricia Raybon, an award-winning author, as they struggle to reconcile and heal their family divided by faith. Undivided is a tremendously important book for our time. RATING: 5 OUT OF 5 STARS

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NEVER EVER BE THE SAME by Kathy Collard Miller & Larry Miller Never Ever Be the Same by husband and wife Kathy and Larry Miller empowers Christians to look honestly at their motives and break free from the lies that fuel sinful patterns. We all respond in ungodly ways at times. We try to figure out why we fail in our words and reactions and even pray for God’s help, but before we know it, we’ve succumbed again to distrusting God and taking it out on other people. But in Never Ever Be the Same, with its biblical principles, insightful stories, and helpful instruction, readers will discover how to unearth the underlying causes of their sin and learn to trust God more for an inner transformation. Each chapter of the book ends with discussion questions which help the reader to better understand themselves and to learn how to apply the concepts of the book to their own lives, which makes is a great book to use in a ladies small group study. If you desire healing in your life and wish to discover the way to contentment and peace, this book is life-changing. RATING: 5 OUT OF 5 STARS

GETTING THROUGH WHAT YOU CAN’T GET OVER by Anita Agers-Brooks There are some things in life people never get over. No matter how much they want to. Many experience abuse, financial disaster, serious illness, death of loved ones, and other common traumas making them believe they’ll never move past the pain, but through research and true story compilations, author Anita Agers-Brooks offers emotional, practical, and spiritual insights from experts and people who have survived intense trauma—and have made it through seemingly impossible situations. Neil Bartlett of CBA Retailers+Resources says, “Readers will be drawn in by real-life stories of individuals struggling with deep issues. In the first chapter, Agers-Brooks shares her story of being in a black, bleak hole when God brought a Jewish woman who survived Auschwitz to her. The story is totally riveting. Throughout the book, readers will feel like Agers-Brooks knows their situation and is walking alongside them.” RATING: 4.5 OUT OF 5 STARS

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REVIEWS

HEATHER VAN ALLEN @HEATHERVANALLEN LEADING HEARTS MUSIC REVIEWER

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MUSIC REVIEWS FIREFLIGHT INNOVA Fireflight’s INNOVA (Latin for “renew”), released on May 5, 2015, a date the group intentionally chose to celebrate their fifth studio album and 15th year as a band. INNOVA expresses that life has trial and pain, but refusing to dwell on or accept defeat, it answers back with hope. It acknowledges that we need to reach out for help--and sometimes hold on for dear life--to find this hope, though, in tracks such as “Keep Fighting,” “Safety” and “Resucitate.” An alternative edge pops with high-energy techno in several of the remaining tracks, bursting forth with positive spirit--“Lightning,” “I’ve Got the Power,” “We Are Alive” and “This is Our Time.” Warning: Some parts of INNOVA may cause spontaneous muscle movements to occur while seated—otherwise known as chair-dancing. RATING: 4 1/2 OUT OF 5

{42.} - -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --

BLANCA Self-Titled Singer/songwriter Blanca (known for Group 1 Crew) offers fans her self-titled album on May 4, her first full-length studio recording as a solo artist, following her EP, Who I Am, titled for her hit radio single. About the significant career step, Blanca says, “I’ve lived a lot of my life in fear and for a while was afraid I could never be anything outside of Group 1 Crew,” she shares. “Creating this project stretched me and challenged me to be authentic and real.” Blanca’s strong vocals and soulful pop sound, mixed with occasional hip-hop moments bring together a track list full of empowering messages encouraging each of us to take ahold of who we are in Jesus and to use the confidence He gives us to stand up for Him no matter what, to be a light and example to others and to be bold with our faith. RATING: 4 1/2 OUT OF 5

HAWK NELSON Diamonds Hawk Nelson’s Diamonds may have released in March , but it’s perfect for May—with its upbeat tracks that may make you want to roll the car windows down and go for a cruise. This album is life-giving and uplifting, encouraging the listener with the reminder of the power of Jesus in our lives, and who we become when we trust in Him. Radio single “Drops in the Ocean” declares God’s unfailing love and grace, while the title track tells us how that love and grace shapes each of us from “dust”—what we are like without Him—into “diamonds” that He can use for His glory. “Live Like You’re Loved” might be a favorite, with its punchy, affirming call for each of us to feel free to be who we are—or like God loves us and has a plan for each of us--because He does. Give your music collection a springtime boost... get Diamonds. RATING:5 OUT OF 5 STARS

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“SERIOUS SPEAKERS,

AUTHORS AND PERFORMERS UNDERSTAND THE IMPORTANCE OF SHARPENING THEIR ABILITIES THROUGH REHEARSALS AND CLASSES. If you want to pursue a career, once

“

you’re ready artistically, then you must get ready professionally. If you’re just a hosting an event, you know the challenge of getting the word out.

For either scenario, you have to develop an understanding of the business side of the industry; part of that involves promotion and networking. Three people who understand this are Mike and Paula Parker and Torry Martin.

—

The husband/wife writing team Mike and Paula Parker have interviewed over a thousand people in all fields, including celebrities like Steven Spielberg, Orlando Bloom, Nicholas Sparks, Steven Curtis Chapman and Phil Keaggy. Torry Martin is an award-winning actor, screenwriter, comedian and author. These three have a combined 55 years of professional experience working in various segments of the entertainment industry.

Leading Hearts spoke with Paula Parker, Mike Parker and Torry Martin about self-promotion and networking. Q: Why should a Christian be concerned with self-promotion? Mike: Throughout all the interviews that Paula and I have done, we have learned two things. One - everyone has a story. Two - not everyone knows how to tell their story. We’ve seen artists at all levels of the industry – both Christian and secular, signed and independent - give horrible interviews, never realizing how this would affect the stories written about them. Paula: If a secular artist messes up an interview, it might reduce the number of album he sells. If Christian artist messes up an interview, it might mess up the message she wants to share. Q: Can an artist learn to promote himself? Torry: Absolutely! I started off on 80 acres in Bear Valley, Alaska; not exactly the Entertainment Capital of the World. That’s where I learned that, just as certain tools and skills are needed for survival in the wilderness, there are also certain tools and skills that are vital for survival as an artist. Q: What is the first step? Mike: Basically, promotion is about introductions. Before you pull together a press kit or have a headshot taken, you have to know who you are, so you know how to introduce yourself, your project or your event. Paula: By the way; while ‘Because I want to serve the Lord,’ might be an honest answer, it’s a boring answer for promotions. Every Christian wants to serve the Lord. Why do you write songs for the Church as opposed to the lost? Why are you hosting a comedy night at your church?

from checking with a professional first; there are some bio writers or photographers who will work within your budget. If that is out of your range, check with the public relations, mass communications or photography departments at local colleges. The professors should be able to refer students they feel can take a headshot or write a bio. Q: What else does someone need for promotions? Mike: A website. In this digital age, this is a must-have. But don’t clutter it up with a lot of bells and whistles that will make it difficult for people to navigate. Choose a domain name that is easy for people to remember. Provide information about you, your project or the event. Include pictures or videos. And don’t forget the contact information. Q: Explain networking. Torry: In a nutshell, networking is about community, even if that community is stretched across the city or the country. Participating in competitions, attending industry events and conferences or getting together over coffee with other industry people are all forms of networking. Networking helps you meet and develop relationships with people in your industry, keep current on trends, expand your support base, exchange your resources and expand your opportunities. Q: Last words? Torry: To borrow from Scripture; “Study to show yourself approved, promote to show yourself professional.” S Paula, Mike and Torry expand upon these topics in their book, Shameless Self Promotion and Networking for Christian Creatives available at amazon.com.

Q: What’s the next step? Torry: The press kit. A press kit is a collection of promotional materials provided to media outlets, performance venues or people of influence. It’s an introduction of the artist and their project or for the event. A good press kit should include a headshot, picture page, bio, resume, endorsements, and a fact sheet. Q: Can you get a friend to take their picture or write a bio? Paula: It’s best if you get a professional headshot or bio. While this can be expensive, don’t let that keep you

- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------{45.} -- --

LEADING HEARTS INSTANT WRITERS CONFERENCE PODCAST

TUNE IN FOR MAY— UNDIVIDED—THE ROAD TO RESOLVING CONFLICT WITH CO-AUTHORSHIP WITH PATRICIA RAYBON

SUBSCRIBE TO LEADING HEARTS ON THE ITUNES NEWSSTAND FOR INSTANT ACCESS.

WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW BEFORE YOU GET ON THE RADIO WITH 99 HIT FM DJ ROD KITTLEMAN

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“CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?”

YOUR KEY TO DIGITAL MARKETING with your host Amber Weigand-Buckley

FIND MORE INFO @ LEADINGHEARTS.COM

WITH REACHMODO’S TYLER HEADLEY

BY SHARON NORRIS ELLIOT @SANEWRITER AUTHOR/SPEAKER www.LifeThatMatters.net

TRUTH

---------

“HOW CAN I BE SURE?” “IN JUDGES, CHAPTER 6, THE

ANGEL OF THE LORD APPEARS TO GIDEON to tell him he is the next judge

“

chosen to deliver Israel, this time from the oppression of the Midianites. Not understanding why he, the least in a small family, would be chosen, Gideon asked the Lord for some reassurance. First, the Lord consumes food with fire. Then He allows dew to fall on an animal skin only and not on the ground, and then on the ground and not on the animal skin (see verses 21 and 36-40). I was a little puzzled by this, not by the signs themselves, but by Jesus’ reaction in the New Testament when He was asked by the Pharisees to show a sign. His reaction then was, “A wicked and adulterous generation asks for a miraculous sign!” Matthew 12:39 NIV. Why was it wicked for the Pharisees to ask for a sign but okay for Gideon?

in obedience. Our loving heavenly Father has no problem reassuring us that we are really hearing from Him, but woe to those of us who clearly hear God’s voice and still do not move and obey. The Pharisees simply wanted to see some magic; their hearts were twisted to hate Jesus no matter what they saw. Gideon was poised to obey. As women in ministry, we sometimes feel we need reassurance from God. Maybe there’s a lull between speaking invitations or we haven’t received a contract for our writing in a while. We are tempted to cry out for a sign. “Lord, tell me something! Show me something!” It’s okay to ask God some questions about what’s going on as long as your question comes from a heart sincerely eager to hear His voice and rest in whatever answer He gives. In Jeremiah 29:13, God speaks to us through the prophet and says “And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart” (NKJ)

I think the answer lies in the heart of the one asking the question. You see, the Pharisees were asking for a God intends for you to hear and understand Him. sign out of their sarcastic disbelief; Gideon was asking What will you do with the voice of God when we hear because of his sincere desire to believe. Gideon’s heart it? S beat for God and he wanted to be sure he was moving - -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------{47.} -- --

MEET OUR CONTRIBUT

meet linda

LINDA EVANS SHEPHERD @LINDASHEPHERD is publisher of Leading Hearts magazine. She is also a best-selling author, an in-demand speaker, and president of Right to the Heart ministries. She is founder of the Advanced Writers and Speakers Association (AWSA). She lives in Colorado with husband Paul, daughter Laura and son Jimmy. www.Sheppro.com

meet amber

AMBER WEIGAND-BUCKLEY @BAREFACEDGIRL is managing editor and art director for Leading Hearts magazine. She is a writer, speaker and multi-award winning editor, having spent over 18 years in the magazine industry. When not working on Leading Hearts, she provides communications and social media support for non-profits and missionaries. She and her Brit-native husband Philip live in Missouri with their three daughters: Saffron, Imogen and Penelope.

www.AWSA.com

reviews MARILYN LUCE ROBERTSON, book review contributor for Leading Hearts magazine, is a copywriter and freelancer who lives in Springfield, MO with her husband and young son. www.luceleaf.wordpress.com HEATHER VAN ALLEN, music review columnist for Leading Hearts magazine, finds some tunes in her earbuds to be a great way to get into the writing zone. She writes from her home in Springfield, MO. www.HeatherVanAllen.wordpress.com

columns

TORS

ANGELA BREIDENBACH is a captivating speaker, coach and award-winning author. Angela volunteers as the Christian Author Network’s president and executive assistant for the Montana-based Jadyn Fred Foundation.www.AngelaBreidenbach.com PENELOPE CARLEVATO is an author of Tea on the Titanic and First Class Etiquette. She speaks on hospitality, historical entertaining, and etiquette and manners for all ages and all occasions. Penelope lives in the Denver, CO. area and is the grandmother of 11. www.PenelopesTeaTime.com MICHELLE S. COX is an author and speaker and the creator of the Just 18 Summers® parenting resources and products.To visit her parenting blog go to www.just18summers.com and www.Facebook.com/just18summers.

features

TORRY MARTIN is a multi-award-winning writer of page and screen, actor, comedian as well as the only guy contributor to Leading Hearts Magazine. He recently won the EPA Higher Goals Award for “Relative Insanity” which appeared in the November/December 2014 issue. www.torrymartin.com PATRICIA RAYBON, award-winning author, has had personal essays on family and faith in such publications as The New York Times Magazine, Newsweek, USA Today, USA Weekend and Country Living Magazine. Her recent book, Undivided, was co-authored with youngest daughter Alana, released this month from HarperCollins. www.patriciaraybon.com

SAUNDRA DALTON-SMITH is an internal medicine physician, author,and speaker. She shares with audiences nationwide on the topics of eliminating limiting emotions, breaking free from mental bondage, and helps others see God’s plan for them to live free in Christ. www.IChooseMyBestLife.Com SHARON NORRIS ELLIOT engaging yet challenging messages touch hearts and tickle the funny-bones of her audiences, making her a popular, sought-after speaker. She and husband James enjoy their empty nest in Southern California. www.lifethatmatters.net EDNA ELLISON wrote Friend to Friend, a Philippians Bible study for church leaders to use as a short devotional at the beginning of planning meetings—or for a mentor to use with her “merea” (Hebrew for “dear young friend”). www.EdnaEllison.com

HEATHER RIGGLEMAN is an author, speaker and full-time wife and mom. You can download a FREE copy of her latest ebook, Let’s Talk About Prayer on her blog, www.HeatherRiggleman.com.

PAM FARREL along with husband Bill are speakers and authors of 40 books including their newest: 7 Simple Skills for Success for Men. For more information visit www.LoveWise.com

JENNIFER TAYLOR is a music and profile contributor for Leading Hearts magazine.

KATHY COLLARD MILLER is a speaker and author whose newest book Never Ever Be the Same: A New You Starts Today released in January. Find her at www.KathyCollardMiller.com

LISA TROYER is a wife, mom, singer/songwriter, radio host, speaker, author and encourager. For information on how to get a free download of her book, A Place to Belong, www.lisatroyer.com

REBEKAH BINKLEY MONTGOMERY is author of Faithprints. Find her online at www.rebekahmontgomery.com RHONDA RHEA is an author, humor columnist and radio personality. She lives in the St. Louis area with her pastor-hubs and has five grown children. www.rhondarhea.com KAREN WHITING is an award-winning author of eighteen books for women, families, boys, and girls. Her newest release, The One Year Devotions for Active Boys, was a dream for eleven years before it started to become a reality. www.karenwhiting.com

— g n i t a r b e l e c e we’r Leading Hearts took home its first

Award of Merit and Torry Martin took a Higher Goals Award for his article “Relative Insanity” from the 2015 Evangelical Press Association Awards in its very first year of publication!

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2015 Evangelical Press Association Award of Merit— Christian Ministry Digital Publication