Education News

Child Mental Health in Tough Times

Education News from Alleyn's | www.alleyns.org.uk

Kiki Taylor, Child and Adolescent Psychotherapist and Lead School Counsellor at Alleyn’s School, tells us how we can support our children’s mental health during these trying times.

Many children and families are struggling during this difficult period. The charity Mind reported in June that 75% of 13-24 year olds with preexisting mental health difficulties have struggled more during lockdown and there is no doubt that all our children are under more pressure now than ever. Professional help should always be sought for the most concerning cases but there is much you can do as a parent to support your child.

Stop, look and listen

Being so close to our children, we sometimes need to take a step back for a moment so that we can observe with a cool head how our child is feeling. Look for changes in their body language, responses, movement or behaviour.

Validation

Children need their experiences to be validated. It is normal to feel anxious about a pandemic but sometimes that anxiety becomes excessive. A child might appear low, withdrawn or they might shut down - or they might mask these feelings with angry outbursts. Remember, all reactions are a child’s attempts at getting their needs met; they might be processing their stress, and it is important not to minimise their concerns but acknowledge them instead. Explain and reassure where you can, and seek advice where you can’t.

Grumble Sessions

Timetable in a regular ‘worry’ or ‘grumble’ session - then set a timer and listen. An activity like drawing can help children express anything they find hard to articulate. Providing this space to explore and understand emotion can really strengthen your child’s mind and you will, quite literally, be supporting their brain function and development.

Do remind your child that they don’t need to hold onto their worries outside these sessions however, and that you will always be available (whenever you can), that you will listen, and that you care. Talk about fears, but focus too on happiness, to help get through difficult times. Recall happy memories and create more memories by making time for fun, like playing board games or baking together. Think about times you have managed difficulties together in the past, and how you did that. This can help a child imagine doing so again and it will remind them of their strengths. Boundaries and consistency really help manage anxiety. Rules for household chores and learning are important, but also make space for fun and talking. Many families actually thrived in lockdown because they spent more time together in a more mindful and reflective space.

Look after yourself!

Don’t forget to take care of yourself, because your capacity to manage things for your child will be enhanced by doing so. Useful guides: • www.gottman.com/blog/category/parentingemotion-coaching • How to talk so Kids Will Listen and Listen so Kids will Talk, Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlish • The Whole-Brain Child, Dr Dan Siegel & Dr Tina Payne Bryson

Link Age Southwark’s Online Pet Contest A Roaring Success

Last month Link Age Southwark tried out a fun new fundraising idea by hosting their first ever Pet Contest online. The event was run through Facebook, with contestants invited to upload photographs of their beloved pets to the event page. Those who don’t use social media could still take part by sending their pictures as an email attachment.

There were five categories to choose from, and five local pet-lovers and friends of the charity were invited to be on the panel of judges. One of the charity’s Ambassadors, actress and doglover Lesley Sharp, said this about her category of ‘Best Buddy – most loyal lockdown friend’ – “All of these animals are utterly delightful and have obviously had a special place in the hearts of their owners’ lockdown. Fabulous. What would we do without these lovely creatures?” Link Age Southwark wanted to highlight the joy and comfort that our pets have brought to all of us throughout these last long months of lockdown and restrictions. For people who are isolated or alone pets can be an amazing source of companionship, and we should celebrate them. The event was a popular success with over 100 photos submitted, and more than £200 was raised for the charity. All money raised goes towards Link Age Southwark’s work in providing support to older, isolated people and people

Ted the Chow

with dementia and their carers in Southwark. Link Age Southwark would like to thank everyone who took part and submitted photos of their brilliant pets – everyone very much enjoyed seeing them and the judges were left with some tough decisions to make.