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EDITOR LETTER
L
:
JESSE ANAYA
et the one who's never sinned throw the first stone. If you are reading this, you and I have something in com I cannot throw a stone and neither can you. Though slaves to iniquities but are unraveled by the crown of t again. He is Risen. He is faithful. He is the Son of God. He forgives. April marks the anniversary date of when a man name and this mark in history signifies the freeing of sin for m being nailed to a cross symbolizes love. Everlasting love. Some may say these things are make believe and othe you? This issue is dedicated to Jesus and signifies our stance Resurrection and the Life. The Alpha and the Omega Redeemer. The One who will return.
mmon. you and I have sinned, we are not thorns of Jesus who died and rose
ed Jesus of Nazareth was crucified mankind. The mark on his hands of
ers choose to believe. I believe. Do
as a ministry in believing He is the a. The One who gave it all. The
Easter
r 2019
WA R R I A
A DAY THAT CHANGED MY LIFE
B Y J E S S E A N AYA
ngelic Magazine had launched exactly 1 month prior and I was a naive 20 something year old magazine creator and editor with a hope in my heart that I could achieve something greater than myself. And I remember that day almost as if God had purposely written it in my story so that I would never forget it. This story takes place almost 6 years ago. It was midday rush hour in downtown San Diego, it's the type of downtown that has the oneway streets with the high rise buildings with the smells and sounds that make you imagine what New York City might be like. On this day everyone seemed to be out and I was in the midst of them. I was hand delivering magazine copies to local fashion boutiques in the Gaslamp District of downtown San Diego. On foot with stacks of magazine copies in my hand with the hustle and bustle of downtown beside me, I was the delivery boy and editor, and writer and photographer of a startup magazine that blended Jesus, Music and Fashion. What I did not know that morning as I awoke and got dressed, tied my shoes and started the engine to my car was that I would soon understand what it meant to be a warrior for Christ later that day. Inside of this fashion boutique there in the Gaslamp District, which is located just south of the Little Italy area of San Diego – only a few blocks from the Pacific Ocean, I saw a middle aged Middle Eastern man sitting behind the counter. In a boutique filled with women's clothing and women shopping, two men had a conversation, and this conversation would change my life. “Does your boutique carry magazines?” That is the question I asked the man sitting behind the counter. At this point in the existence of Angelic Magazine, I was ready to give copies to any establishment that would carry it. The man behind the counter had a thick accent and I doubt I would recognize him if I saw him today but I remember how he made me feel as I spoke to him.
He responded to me with his eye on the stack of magazines in my hand, “What kind of magazine do you have?” If you can visualize a local fashion boutique in a downtown setting with cars passing by on the street and people walking past the storefront with mannequin's in the window that had the trendy looks and the modern styles, this boutique was it. I assume he owned this boutique with his wife because two men surrounded in a store of women's clothing was out of place. I needed a little confidence to speak the words out, “My magazine blends Jesus, music and fashion,” I said. When I spoke Jesus' name out loud it seemed as if the walls in the building had shrunk. The man asked for a copy out of the stack in my hands and looked at the cover showing a model with the tagline above Angelic that read: JESUS. MUSIC. FASHION. He examined the magazine, opened its pages and looked at the photos. As he felt the texture of the magazine paper with his fingers, I stood there just watching, not knowing what he was thinking. Then in a moment's time he subtly flickered, “Do you believe Jesus is the Son of God,” he asked. Of all the things he could have said to me, I wasn't expecting that question. My thoughts whistled inside and I verbalized, “yes.” “Do you believe this Jesus forgives you for your sins,” he asked. My thoughts whistled a little more and I said, “Yes, I believe I am forgiven for my sins.” The women browsing clothes nearby the register, it was obvious they began to listen in to the words we were speaking. His demeanor turned from inquisitive to abrasive. “You Christians think you know about Jesus but you know nothing about the Bible,” he told me. He stopped flipping through the magazine, set it down and looked me in the eye and said, “Do you know there are books of the Bible that they left out?” And judging the reaction of his facial expression, to his surprise I told him, “Do you mean the Gnostic Bible?”
O R
DO YOU BELIEVE IF YOU ASK FOR FORGIVENESS YOU WILL BE FORGIVEN FOR YOUR SINS?
The Gnostic Bible are gospels (chapters) some theologians and scholars say were left out of the New Testament of the Bible but it cannot be proven if these texts and claims are true or accurate. I could say I wrote a chapter of the Bible that needs to be included in the New Testament but a claim cannot be proven true without evidence. I began to pray and recite Luke 21:15 to myself in my head because I knew a confrontation was developing. “For I will give you words and wisdom that none of your adversaries will be able to resist or contradict.” Luke 21:15
This Middle Eastern man began to flick out his opinions about the Bible and the Christian faith. At this point the casual eaves dropping turned into blatant staring and the women shoppers were watching a conversation about Jesus Christ the Son of God take place inside of a fashion boutique in the midst of the hustle and bustle of downtown San Diego. I just wanted to deliver magazines, I wasn't intending to cause a stir. I stood there and I remember my spirit wasn't looking to argue or offend anyone. I remember asking God if I was to give a word to this man to give me the opportunity to do so and to give me the words and the wisdom that none of my adversaries could resist or contradict. Then it happened. As the conversation began to unravel the man asked me, “So, if I just ask for forgiveness, you're telling me I can be forgiven for my sins?” I said, “Yes.” He shouted, “That's too cheap for me. That's too easy. What proof do you have?” His shout caught everyone in the building off guard. I needed to be bold, I couldn't be a sheep, I needed to be a witness for Christ and it was in that moment my prayers came to life. I told the man about two criminals hanging on separate crosses beside Jesus as they each awaited their death from crucifixion. One criminal mocked Jesus while the other asked Jesus to remember him in His Kingdom. The man and the women in the boutique were listening to my story. This was the moment I was praying for, this was the moment for my opportunity to stand for Christ. My eyes glanced the room as I continued to speak. I verbalized how Jesus told the man who asked Him to remember him, “Today, you will be with me in paradise.” Luke 23:43 Jesus did not have to think about offering forgiveness. Today, Jesus said.
(Continued on next page)
I looked the man in his eye and told him, forgiveness is God's grace. What happened next could only be done by God. The Middle Eastern man stepped out from behind the counter and walked over to me and grabbed the stack of magazines out of my hand. I wasn't sure if he was angry or upset with me. I didn't know if he was going to throw the magazines away or tell me to leave the building. He was standing right in front of me, face to face and very calmly he said, “Next month when your next issue comes out, bring me more copies.” Walking back to the counter he set the magazines down and he walked back over to me and stuck his right hand out to shake mine. The women in the boutique were staring at his every movement. I was stunned, but I tried not to show it. He winked at me and told me to enjoy my day. This was a day that changed my life. If this man saw me today I doubt that he would recognize me. I never returned that following month as I moved out of state just a few weeks after this exchange. But I am certain that he remembers our conversation just as I do all these years later. I do not know what his faith was prior to our exchange or what is faith is today but I do know on that day he and others heard about the saving grace of Jesus Christ. My walk with Jesus left that building different then I entered it and believe in my heart each those people listening stepped out of that building with a shift in their heart as well. As I journey through life I have learned that to be a Warrior for Christ is to love well. We so often think of a warrior as one who fights, but a Warrior for Christ slays their enemy with love. A Warrior for Christ loves well because love can penetrate a shield in ways that hate cannot. I have learned that a Warrior for Christ must be ready at all times; that we must be ready in prayer, in our responses and how we conduct ourselves in the world – because the world is watching. 1 Peter 3:15 “in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect”
" A W a r r i o r f o r C h r i st loves well because l o v e c a n p e n e t r at e a s h i e l d i n way s t h at h at e c a n n o t . I h av e l e a r n e d t h at a Wa r r i o r for Christ must be r e a d y at a l l t i m e s ; t h at w e m u s t b e r e a d y i n p r ay e r , i n o u r responses and how we c o n d u c t o u r s e lv e s i n the world, because the world is wat c h i n g . "
M A G A Z I N E MODEL:
LILLIAN
F E A T U R E HEPLER
:
A N G E L I N A
W H I T E H E A D
P H O T O G R A P H E R P R O V O C I T Y , U T
THE SATURDAY OF OUR SOULS B Y H A N N A H T H O M A S
"SCRIPTURE IS CLEAR THAT THEY HAD HOPE. HOPE THAT WE HAVE WITHIN OUR REACH TODAY, MORE THAN 2,000 YEARS LATER" It’s strange how a short span of time can feel so long. Most of adult life seems to fly by with work and family and hobbies and travel and chores and TV. Days turn into weeks that turn into months that turn into years. Until suddenly time stops. The phone call you’ve been dreading. The confrontation you hadn’t expected. The loss of something precious that’s been snatched away. The disappointment in a potential future that’s now been removed from all possibility. There are moments in life where we have to abruptly face a reality that seems harsher than life was before, and where taking the next step may seem impossible. In this, time appears to run slower, the minutes melting away in what feels like an eternity… I’ve tried to imagine what that time between Jesus’ crucifixion and resurrection was like for his disciples and followers. The worst had come. Hope Himself had been brutally killed. While it’s possible the disciples considered Jesus’ prophecy that He would return, it might have seemed nothing more than a false promise, something that didn’t speak to their very present reality. They probably imagined that everything was lost. The vision cast for a future of freedom from Roman rule –of the kingdom of God on earth –seemed gone. They probably felt foolish for believing that life could be any better than it had ever been, or that the future could be anything more than bleak. Christians celebrate the Easter week with Good Friday and Resurrection Sunday happening in one weekend, while the actual time between events was a bit longer. Still, while ultimately they didn’t have to wait too long, I’m sure it felt like forever. Waiting always does. But, miracle of miracles, as with the disciples so too does Jesus meet us there in the waiting –in the despair, in the disappointment. Since we are limited creatures with temporal vision and a tendency towards doubt, it may seem impossible and hard to accept that He is alive and active today. Yet the Bible assures us we’ve all been given a measure of faith, and ironically, it’s our faith in an invisible God that makes Him known to us. But even when He showed Himself resurrected and very much alive to His followers, it didn’t mean their lives became perfect. In fact, they experienced a loss again as He took from them His human form, and afterwards they spent years suffering various persecutions. But through all this, Scripture is clear that they had hope. Hope that we have within our reach today, more than 2,000 years later: Hope that we are not bound by our circumstances. Hope that present dark realities can change into futures of light. Hope that a distant, and yet near, perfect and eternal reality awaits us. Hope that no matter how long Saturday may last, Sunday always comes.
by hi woun war he le
ISAI A H
y is nds were ea ed
H 53:5
APRIL IS SEXUAL ASSAULT AWARENESS MONTH
C O M M U N I T Y SAN LUIS OBISPO
,
S P O T L I G H T
CA
"I PUSHED THE THOUGHT OF BEING RAPED TO THE BACK OF I DID NOT WANT TO ADDRESS THAT MY BODY HAD BEEN TA FROM ME. I DID NOT WANT TO FEEL AS THOUGH I DID NO HOME WITHIN MYSELF ANYMORE."
T
:
Amelia Meyerhoff
F MY MIND. AKEN AWAY OT HAVE A
MY TESTIMONY
My name is Amelia Meyerhoff and I am a senior at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo. In Spring 2019, I will be graduating with a Bachelor’s in English and minors in Spanish and psychology. For my senior project, I decided to conduct an investigation into the sexual assault and rape climate at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo through interviewing survivors who are students or alumni. I am calling this investigation The Clapback. During my second year at Cal Poly, I was raped by someone who I considered to be my friend. My perpetrator and I had been hooking up for a few months. He asked me to come over while I was at a party. I agreed. When I showed up, it was clear he had an agenda. We went up to his room. He locked the door. I wondered why he felt that was necessary because his roommate was gone. He put his music on as loud as it would go. I realized no one would hear me if I needed help. He ordered me to take all of my clothes off. I felt uncomfortable and scared. I took everything off except my underwear because I was not ready to have sex. He put on a condom and immediately yanked them off. I was frozen. I could not move or fight him off or tell him to stop. He penetrated me without asking if that was okay. He took my freeze response as a “yes” since I was not verbally saying “no.” However, silence never equates to a “yes.” He raped me twice that night. When I left his apartment, I pushed the thought of being raped to the back of my mind. I did not want to address that my body had been taken away from me. I did not want to feel as though I did not have a home within myself anymore. I returned to my apartment and cried. I continued to cry every day for months after this night. I confided in some of our mutual friends about what he did. Some of my friends immediately labelled what he did to me as rape, making me feel validated in the severity of his actions that night. Other friends sided with him. They told me that since my perpetrator and I had already been intimate for months, I no longer had the right to say “no” if I did not want to
2 8 % O F C O L L E G E S T U D E N T S W I L L R E P O RT EXPERIENCING RAPE. (RAINN.ORG)
have sex on certain occasions. They told me that I should have called the police or gotten over it. They told me that I should try and forgive him. These invalidating sentiments made me feel as though I should minimize what I went through…that I should stop thinking about it and stop being upset and stop feeling completely disconnected from myself. After hearing so many invalidating statements, I feared opening up to people about being a rape survivor. It was not until I started speaking with other survivors that I felt truly comfortable in addressing my experience. In my third year at Cal Poly, I joined group therapy for survivors. This group helped me realize I was not alone in the trauma I was facing and still face today. They taught me that what I feel is valid, acceptable, and should never be minimized. Furthermore, their experiences drew my attention to the amount of injustice survivors face in coming forward about their incidents. I never reported mine because I did not have any evidence and it took me several months to label my experience as rape. However, when other survivors talked about having the courage to report their perpetrators to Title IX, I realized we have a major problem in our reporting system. Many survivors expressed that Title IX only worsened their trauma and provided them with absolutely zero justice. Hearing their stories about invalidation and injustice made me frustrated and angry so much so that I wanted everyone on this campus to hear about what we have gone through. That is why I started my project: The Clapback: An Investigation of the Sexual Assault and Rape Climate at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo. When I started the project, I really wanted to focus on shedding light on survivors’ voices because we are so often silenced or brushed under the rug. In 1995, Cal Poly’s S.A.F.E.R. (Sexual Assault Free Environment Resource) started the Red Hands Project in which they painted red hands on areas of campus where assaults had taken place. Most red handprints were found outside of residence halls, causing parents to take notice and ask about the handprints while touring the campus with their children. Parents understandably started to voice their concerns about sending their children to a university with a sexual assault and rape problem. Rather than addressing the scrutiny and offering further solutions to the sexual violence
W O M E N A R E T W I C E A S L I K E LY T O B E RAPED THAN BE ROBBED WHILE IN COLLEGE. (RAINN.ORG)
issue at this university, administration decided to paint over these red handprints in 2005 to avoid a drop in admissions rates. I do not believe that survivors’ stories should ever be painted over, which is why the symbol for The Clapback is a red hand. I will not be repainting the red handprints on areas of campus in which assaults have taken place; however, I do want each survivor’s story to remind students that we cannot be brushed under the rug forever. We deserve a platform and I want this project to give that to us. I am calling the project The Clapback because I want these survivors’ testimonies to be a slap in the face to all of those who have ignored us or have simply chosen to not address our existence. The Clapback is a research investigation featuring testimonies from 60 Cal Poly students or alumni who identify as survivors of sexual violence. I asked them about the incidents they went through, how they navigate Cal Poly’s culture, how the experience of sexual violence impacts their daily life, and where they find support and healing. I started this project in April 2018 and plan to release it in April 2019. After taking in survivors’ traumatic experiences for the past year, I have selected key topics and entities of campus that need to be highlighted in this investigation. I will be pulling out quotes from testimonies that pertain to the topics and entities listed below. These include: S.A.F.E.R., Counseling services, Title IX, administration, President Armstrong, law enforcement, fraternities, academics, campus culture, campus safety, toxic masculinity, intersectionality, empathy, a fear of coming forward, mental health, triggers, support in the survivor community, a lack of consequences for perpetrators, sex education, the impact on daily life, consent, the freeze response, coercion, intimacy and relationships, invalidation and victim blaming, resilience, and suggestions for improvement. A report of the findings and statistical analysis obtained through this investigation will be distributed all over campus at the beginning of spring quarter. Additionally, I will be publishing the data, findings, and a majority of the survivors’ testimonies on a website for the project. Once published, the website can be found at theclapback.net and will go live by mid April. Further information about the project can also be found at @the.clap.back on Instagram.
G E T H S E M A N E B Y J O N N Y G O R A S H
J
esus wrestled with the darkness in the garden of Gethsemane. As His disciples slipped into the thickn begged for the Light. Blood, sweat, and tears were raining from the Son; each drop a sin that He’d have to have broken any man, but His Father never left Him; this was His plan. He rose from His knees to be greeted with betrayal. With swords and clubs they seized Him as everyone His face was the very first nail. Even Peter would deny that he had ever known the Man. So He was beaten, mocked, and scorned by those He loved. His flesh was torn asunder by whips staine dropped the heavy cross upon his shredded shoulders and prodded Him to drag it through the streets of H continue on His way until His body wasn’t able and collapsed beneath the frame. He was nailed to that tree once He reached Calvary, lifted high atop a hill for all the world to see. He "Look upon what we have done; we have killed Love.” But Love does not die so easily. Love cannot be nailed down to anything. Love does not stay within th So when you're kneeling in the garden, in anguish or in pain—doubt or shame —and darkness tries to suffocate your voice, know that He got up from His knees knowing you’d forsake Him, deny Him, and betray Him, but kept walking anyway. When you’re in Gethsemane, know that He was shamed so you don’t have to be ashamed. He already carried the cross of your worries and burdens. He became all of your sin—past, present, future—and nailed it to the tree so you could leave it there. What of death? He condemned it to the grave, so do not fear. When you've fallen in the garden and it seems everyone’s asleep, know that He won’t leave. He’s already claimed the victory.
ness of night, He knelt on His knees and o bear. The thought of that burden would
e forsook Him and fled. Judas’ kiss upon
ed in the blood of criminals before. They His creation. Each step was a decision to
was a torn and ragged banner that read:
he grave, and bursting forth like daylight
"HE WAS CALVARY,
NAILED TO THAT TREE ONCE HE REACHED LIFTED HIGH ATOP A HILL FOR ALL THE WORLD TO SEE. HE WAS A TORN AND RAGGED BANNER THAT READ: "LOOK UPON WHAT WE HAVE DONE; WE HAVE KILLED LOVE.”
M A G A Z I N E
: HANNAH J. CO C L O T H I N G C O M P A N Y C I N C I N N A T I , O H
F E A T U R E
ACTIVELY PURSUING JESUS My name is Hannah Williamson. In April of 2018 my grandfather Larry E. Cole passed away from leukemia. He was one of the Godliest men I knew. He loved Jesus and his family with all of his being. Grandpa was a walking Bible, knowing an incredible amount of the Word by heart. Up until his final breath he was witnessing to others, asking them if they truly knew Jesus and if He was Lord of their life. Throughout my life, every time I saw a visitor leave his home he would always vocalize to them as a friendly reminder, "Keep Looking to Jesus!". This saying, my love for God, and my grandfather is what inspired me to launch this line of clothing. After much thought, work and prayer, I ended up launching my new faith based clothing brand Hannah J Co. on December 26th, 2018 with the first collection titling “KL2J” which stands for the infamous saying, “Keep Looking to Jesus”. Yes, a clothing brand is able to make you money but that is not my goal. My goal for Hannah J Co. above all else is to be a walking ministry as people wear my clothing. I believe the Biblically based sayings we are designing and placing on each shirt are able to be a door opener to witness when someone you come in contact with questions the meaning. My prayer is that we would all be bold like Larry E. Cole in ministering and witnessing the love of Christ to every one we come in contact with. I want to see souls saved for Christ’s namesake. Any opportunity to witness to someone is an absolute privilege. We should never sit idle and wait for a move of God when we are the move of God. Revival starts with us, so go out and make disciples! Lastly, my prayer is that we would be passionately and relentlessly pursuing Jesus every single day of our life on this earth. Which is why our company is launching a new line really soon entitled, “Actively Pursuing Jesus.”
h is no her h is ris
M AT TH E
he s ot re, he s sen
EW 28:6
I "EASTER IS THE TIME WE REMEMBER THAT GOD, TOO, GAVE UP HIS SON TO DEATH."
A HOPE FOR TOMORROW B Y E M I L Y C H A F I N
grew up thinking chocolates to my house. B A recent church servic devastating diagnosis of c Women cried. Grown m While I don’t know thi was even more intense be she was born. What I’ve seen her fami It’s hard to stand by an live through one yourself
Easter was a time to wear crisp, clean church clothes and wait on a bunny to bring But growing up certainly changed that view for me. ce ended with the testimony of family who lost their three year old daughter to a cancer. This was a sermon that shook every single person in attendance to their core. men cried. I cried while holding my new baby tightly in my arms. is family personally, I felt their pain through their words. The pain that came to me ecause a dear friend of mine had recently lost her daughter just nine short hours after
ily go through is excruciating to witness. nd see others go through painful experiences of life and it’s certainly even harder to f. But that church sermon wasn’t just a reel of heartbreaking stories because the main story told was a story of hope. And it highlighted a hope that exists only because of Easter. Easter is the time we remember that God, too, gave up his son to death. Jesus was mocked, ridiculed, beaten, tormented, and ultimately killed. He died a painful death just for being the son of God. But more importantly, he died for the sins of all, even those who killed him. Despite His painful death on the cross, His story did not end. He rose from that horrible grave three days later and because He did, we are given hope that what we go through is not the end of our journey. The pain we endure today isn’t going to last. The hurt of our circumstances will not stay with us forever. Because Jesus died for us and was resurrected, that sweet toddler is dancing in heaven, waiting on her family. Precious baby Claire is perfectly whole and ready to spend many more hours with her family. And we all have hope for a better tomorrow; a hope for a harmonious reunion with our Lord and King. Death was not the end for Jesus. It’s not the end for us.
VESSEL P H O T O G R A P H Y + W O R D S B Y J AY L E E D AV I S
A
s a creative and photographer, my art is often inspired by what God is teaching me. I have a personality that doesn't "let go" very often but, somehow when it comes to creativity, I can let go. I let go of perfectionism, expectations, and control. I can let ideas be messy and timeless and the end product always forms into something beautiful regardless. Through this “letting go” mindset, I am more receptive to what God is trying to speak to me. My creative process happens in many different ways. Sometimes I will take a specific thing God has placed on my heart and translate it through a photoshoot. However, often inspiration comes in small pieces that get grouped together overtime to create a photoshoot idea. I catch myself hesitating with this type of inspiration because I can’t understand the meaning fully until after the photoshoot has been completed. When finding inspiration for this photoshoot and when asking God what he wanted to do through this photoshoot, I wasn’t finding much clarity at first. I found inspiration in small pieces until it formed everything encompassed. I was inspired by linens and cloths due to the purity that they brought. I knew I needed to include clay pots but I didn’t know the reason why at the moment. And lastly, I knew I wanted to include nature; palm branches and eucalyptus happen to be what stuck out to me. These small pieces of inspiration seemed random but, I placed them together regardless. I completed the photoshoot and still found myself asking God what it all meant. After doing some research, I learned that palm trees signified victory, triumph, and beauty. They are bold as they stand taller than most trees and even when loaded with weight from fruit and leaves, they still grow upward. The Bible talks about jars of clay often. Clay vessels were used to store scrolls and important documents. Vessels are much different than a tool. Unlike a tool whose purpose is to do something, a vessel’s purpose is to contain something.
"GOD CALLS US TO BE HIS VESSEL, HE DOESN’T NEED US TO DO ANYTHING FOR HIM BUT HE DOES CALL US TO BE FILLED WITH HIM. BUT, JUST LIKE A CLAY VESSEL, WE ARE VERY FRAGILE AND CAN EASILY SHATTER TO PIECES. WE NEED OUR GRACIOUS FATHER WHO WILL MEND OUR PIECES BACK TOGETHER."
God calls us to be his vessel, he doesn’t need us to do anything for him but he does call us to be filled with him. But, just like a clay vessel, we are very fragile and can easily shatter to pieces. We need our gracious Father who will mend our pieces back together. We are all walking through different valleys and mountain tops in our lives but one thing remains true and that is our need for our Father. In the same way inspiration comes to me in pieces, I believe God reveals his plan for us in a similar way. We often do not know why or what the pieces are for, but then they come together to create something beautiful and purpose filled. I pray that God will speak to you through these photographs, no matter how big or small. Ask him to open your heart and revel to you what they can mean to you and the current season of life that you are in.
FREE B Y K A Y T I E G A U S
What is holding you hostage? What are your chains and shackles holding you back from living a free life? Do you even know what a free life looks like anymore? Regret, doubt, sin, mistakes, money, anxiety, these are all real things that cause angst in our hearts and restrict us from running wildly free for Jesus. There was once a moment in your life when you felt free. It could date back to your childhood. Running freely through the neighborhood. Or maybe it was graduation day, and getting handed your diploma was a freeing moment. Or it could have been the moment you asked God for salvation. Whatever your freedom looked like, even if it was just for a split second, I promise you, you can have it back. You can be made new each and every morning. I've been there. There have been days I wake up anxious. Fearful for the state of the world or personal circumstances. Maybe you go in to a job everyday that drains you of joy. Maybe you have been passed on chains from previous generations and you are convinced it's a curse. You might feel your shackles are so tight there is no escape. But here's the good news, you have a second chance at being free. A second chance at wildly pursuing Jesus, running free because of His own sacrifice. Jesus gave Himself up for us. He died a death He didn't deserve for us. He was mocked, ridiculed, and beaten. He hung on a cross. All for us to have the opportunity to run free. According to scripture, "For Christ died for sins once and for all, a good man on behalf of sinners, in order to lead you to God. He was put to death physically, but made alive spiritually" (1 Peter 3:18) A phrase that stands out to me in that verse is "once and for all." It doesn't have to happen again. Jesus died His death once for you and me. Once to cover all sins. Once for us to have salvation, relish in that.
ABUNDANT LIFE IN THE FACE OF DEATH B Y E M I L Y S E N F F
"JESUS' DEATH AND RESURRECTION DIDN'T JUST COVER THE COST OF WHAT WE HAD DONE, IT GAVE US THE FREEDOM TO LIVE IN THE GRACE THAT IS EXTENDED OUR WAY" I'm not sure where this month finds you, but I've noticed that there has been a lot of death in this world recently. Tragedy has struck countries and communities and lives in countless ways, and it seems to be a more difficult year than those that came before it. Since the beginning of this year, I have attended more funerals than weddings. I have cried more tears of loss and grief than tears of joy. And each time, I am caught off guard. Death, while inevitable for all of us, can come unexpected and shake us to the very core of who we are. It has a habit of changing things. It puts things into perspective, acts as a reminder of the brevity of life, and hardens hearts more often than not. And so, I have been asking myself this question: if death especially the kind that simply does not make sense is not inspiring us to live, what is it doing? We are called to live abundant lives, even in the midst of the chaos and confusion of this world. Jesus' death and resurrection didn't just cover the cost of what we had done, it gave us the freedom to live in the grace that is extended our way regardless of who we are, where we've been, or where we're going. Yet so many times, it can feel like we are still living in the grave when we have been cleared to walk in grace. It can be all too familiar to feel the burden and the weight of the difficulties of this world but this heaviness we carry, we were never meant to bear on our own. The fear and the shame and the sin and the pain those were carried to the Cross when Jesus took those steps for us. What's more, three days later he showed us just how powerful, how mighty our God is He conquered death and put it in it's place so that nothing could be held over us anymore. Jesus' death did not make sense to most people. Even now, it seems so big to wrap our minds around. If this kind of death and reawakening does not inspire us to wake up in our own lives, then what? This Easter season, I am reminded that "in a single victorious stroke of Life, all three sin, guilt, death are gone, the gift of our Master, Jesus Christ" (1 Cor. 15:57, MSG). I am encouraged that Jesus knew what he was doing as he took our place. I am thankful that He extends grace so that we might live and live fully in a freedom that only He could offer.
no m wi bu you be d LU K E
ot my ill ut urs done ,
22:42
B Y J E S S E A N AYA
GOD ' S W I LL , NO T MI N E
In the hours before Jesus was to be arrested, publicly beaten, mocked, given a crown of thorns and nailed to a cross to die, He prayed a prayer. He asked God if there was another way for people to be saved through Him instead of death on a cross. Scripture tells us Jesus was in anguish and prayed earnestly. The scriptures tell us His sweat looked like drops of blood falling from Him as He prayed. But something really important was prayed in Jesus’ prayer. He told God, “Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.” Luke 22:42 He prayed for God’s will to prevail, not His own. Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior wanted His own will to come to pass but He asked for God’s will to be lived out instead. Are you prepared to pray that prayer? A prayer of surrendering your wants and desires to God so that His wants and desires for you will come to life? The author A.W. Tozer has a great quote that reads, "Outside the will of God, there's nothing I want. Inside the will of God, there's nothing I fear." Through God’s will on our life we get to experience the richness and live out the full purpose of who He’s called us to be for Him. Outside of His will there is nothing that I want, and inside it there is nothing I will ever fear.
Prayer Lord, let your will be done in my life. I pray for your will to live through every aspect of who I am. I'm asking for your wants and desires to become my wants and desires so that you and I can become one. I pray for your spirit to lead me as I walk by faith with you. I give my life to you, Jesus.
Happy Easter