March 2015 Issue

JESUS.

MUSIC.

FASHION.

ANGELIC March2015

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REVELATIONS 4:11

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I NVEST. B RAND. M ARKET. G E L I c.

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Carly Marin Photo-Shoot Designated Ugly Fat Friend Ricky Brown Testimony Lisa Zimmer Testimony Amber Silva Photo-Shoot Zack Lovato Music Spotlight Being Boldy Real Why I won’t have sex with her Jennifer Hulsey Music Spotlight One Worship Gatherings Newlyweds Heather Albano Photographer Spotlight Katrina Barclay Music Spotlight What’s Your Status Romance & Marriage Andrew Cunningham Music Spotlight The Real Movement Jeffrey Johnson Testimony Where’s My Adam???

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JESUS. MUSIC. FASHION.

EDITOR'S LETTER

I

WEST COAST. EAST COAST.

f you're finding Angelic Magazine for the first time, welcome.

More than my words, I want you to see what Angelic is for yourself. I hope you enjoy the visuals, the stories, the testimonies for Jesus. And I hope what you come away with is a sense of wanting to know Jesus more after you've looked at the pages of this issue.

This issue is Angelic's first issue featuring a colliding of coasts, the west and east coasts into our mag. We've been exclusively a west coast magazine until this point.

I'm a west coast guy who grew up in a tiny town on the California coast, and never did I fathom one day I'd be a part of a group of people reaching a country for Jesus.

This is all possible because of Him.

MATTHEW 28:19 "THEREFORE GO AND MAKE DISCIPLES OF ALL NATIONS, BAPTIZING THEM IN THE NAME OF THE FATHER AND OF THE SON AND OF THE HOLY SPIRIT" JESUS. MUSIC. FASHION. WWW.ANGELICMAG.COM

WEST COAST WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO WITNESS IS A COLLECTION OF MUSIC,

FASHION AND THE STORIES OF REAL PEOPLE SEEKING TO LIVE FOR JESUS WEST OF THE MISSISSIPPI RIVER.

JESUS. MUSIC. FASHION.

Ca rly J ea n M a ri n

p h otog ra p h e r - s a n fra n ci s co

I

"L OOKING BACK I SEE THAT EVEN WHEN I WAS WEAK AND DOUBTED, GOD LOVED ME AND WANTED ME STILL . "

was seventeen years old when I was filled with the Holy Spirit, an experience that can only be described as supernatural. I didn’t ask for it, and I certainly didn’t expect it.

I suddenly began bawling and I had no idea why.

My eyelids fluttered and they, along with the rest of my body, were beating to the drum of a quickening heart. I started speaking in another language that I’d never heard before.

It felt strange on my tongue and it terrified me at first. For a moment I felt like all of me was only spirit.

While body stood planted on the earth I was taken to another place.

I was in God’s presence. I had witnessed something far beyond this world. And He was good.

I was raised in a Christian home, but it wasn’t until I was thirteen and classmate of mine tragically passed that I began seriously thinking about the scope of eternity. I went to a Christian camp that summer and learned about the Book of Life.

When they asked those of us who wanted to accept Christ to come up front, my knees locked and fear kept me seated in my chair. I knew what they were talking about was Truth, but I felt too awkward, and embarrassed to go up front.

I came home from camp and accepted Christ alone, seated with tangled legs in the middle of my room. I repeated the words written in my stiff bible. I didn’t feel anything, and for a long time I entertained the thought that maybe God wasn’t really there.

Little did I know that three years later, He would remind me that He’s never left me to begin with.

I carry that day I was filled with the Spirit in my pocket each day. It’s a constant reminder of why I choose to follow Christ—because He’s actually alive.

More than that, He sought me out, and wants a relationship with me.

Looking back I see that even when I was weak and doubted, God loved me and wanted me still.

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He’s never been surprised that I’m not perfect or mad when I mess up. The God I know simply looks like Love, and fervent love at that. After my encounter with the Lord I knew that my life is not to be lived for things of this world, but with eternity in mind.

The life I’m called to live is one that allows Jesus to love others through me.

At twenty-two I left home for eleven months to go around the world on a mission trip. I witnessed the power of the name Jesus with my own eyes, and the reality of the spiritual realm was more evident than I’ve ever realized.

Demons fled at the name of Jesus. Bodies, souls and minds were healed by the name of Jesus. The same Spirit that filled me when I was seventeen—was the exact same Spirit that was alive and apparent in other people from all corners of the earth.

Everything I’ve seen, heard and experienced points to God as the Creator. The One who created the stars created, too, my bones and lungs.

He formed my mind and painted the woven lines on my hands. I have been given eternal security in Him, and a peace in my heart that nothing in this world can compare to.

The only thing that makes my heart content is the faith I have in Him who is beyond this life. We are constantly in the midst of the spiritual realm and spiritual battles whether we recognize it or not.

The more I choose to recognize this and choose out of the temporality of this world, I experience what is truly worth living for.

“The One who lives in you is stronger than the one who is in the world.” 1 John 4:4

DESIGNATED UGLY FAT FRIEND

I

" L ET'S WELCOME SPRING AS WE WELCOME FEARLESS, INDIVIDUAL BEAUTY. L OVE AND RESPECT YOURSELF. TRULY BELIEVE THAT GOD KNEW WHAT HE WAS DOING WHEN HE MADE YOU -- YOU. "

B Y KATIE MAY - VERSE 14 MINISTRY

t's just about Spring time, and every season's change in the year feels like a fresh, new beginning. A year ago, I wanted very different things. I'm sure everyone can attest to that in their own lives.

I've been thinking about this new spring season coming and the change I want to see in my life.

Though I have deep, important passions and prayers, there is somehow always room for that one dwelling thought in my head: my appearance.

I hate to admit that one of the first thoughts I think of when I hear "Spring" is "shorts", and "Summer", "swimsuit season". And from this quick thought spirals a million other selfcriticizing ones.

I’ve been so annoyed lately with my Spotify commercials for a new movie coming out called, “DUFF”, which stands for “designated ugly fat friend”.

To some people it’s just a movie, but to me it is another opportunity satan gets to get in our heads. It will always hurt me when I notice people seeing themselves as "not good enough", because I know that's not true.

I hurt myself when I unknowingly tell myself this lie too. But believe you are good enough simply because GOD said you are good enough. He didn't just allow you to exist, but He, Himself, created you in His perfect image.

"So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him, male and female he created them. And God blessed them." (Gen 1:27-28) I really think in new seasons you should allow change in your life. Last year I wrote encouraging sticky notes on my bathroom mirror. If this would help remind you of the truth, do it! Because I refuse to be a girl who believes I am too curvy to wear shorts, or too feminine to pull-off tattoos.

Let's welcome spring as we welcome fearless, individual beauty.

Love and respect yourself. Truly believe that God knew what He was doing when He made you -- YOU. Don't let comparison and self-criticism get in the way of your life's perfect moments.

Sometimes those perfect moments are ice cream sandwiches at midnight.

RickyBrown AGE: 28 - TEMPLETON , CA

"I HAD NEVER REALLY GONE TO CHURCH,

IT WAS ALWAYS

SOMETHING MY MOTHER WANTED TO TAKE MYSELF AND MY

I

BROTHER TO BUT JUST NEVER TRANSPIRED GROWING UP. VISIT HOWEVER

THIS

I FEEL CAME AT JUST THE RIGHT TIME WITH WHAT I HAD GOING ON IN MY HEAD. "

" t's the oldest story in the world. One day you're 17 and planning for someday and then quietly and without you really noticing someday is today and then someday is yesterday and this is your life."

It was on a TV show I used to watch that I first got hooked on during my high school years and it lasted long enough for me to be in my twenties. I was 25 years old when I first heard that and I specifically remember thinking to myself wow where did the time go?

At 17 I know personally I didn’t really know what I was doing the next day let alone the next month or year for that matter. Going back to that time, I was just about the present and being around my friends, playing baseball and going to school.

The basics of a seventeen year old I figured, or at least at that time I did. Sure there were aspirations of playing college baseball but really it was just something I would get to down the road. Well that road came a lot faster than I thought when I was 17 that was for sure.

With that came the realization that the real world was in fact real and not just a cruise through the park. 5 years later, 4 different junior colleges trying to be that student athlete I had thought about being when I was 17.

There were a lot of lessons learned, an appreciation for my close family, a lack of confidence in my game and there I was; a 25 year old reflecting on the someday, the yesterday and the now.

Going along with that same time I had gone to a good friend’s house up in northern California to visit her and her family. I had stayed through the weekend which allowed me to tag along on there Sunday trip to Santa Cruz Bible Church.

Honestly I had never really gone to church, it was always something my mother wanted to take myself and my brother to but just never transpired growing up. This visit however I feel came at just the right time with what I had going on in my head.

Not sure whether it was the pastor and the way he gave his service that day or just the low key, friendly atmosphere but I felt that this was a place I felt comfortable. Not living close to attend every Sunday I’ve tried my best to stay current by watching the services they post up each week to this day. It has been baby steps but I gain knowledge and allow myself to let go of some things that really I can’t control.

Now I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not the most religious person around, so like I said it is an ongoing process. For me, it’s about learning that God does have a plan for everyone and that each step forward and even the ones behind you will have its good and bad.

Also having faith in yourself and God during the present and in the future will allow you to have a better today and someday.

Lisa Zimmer TUCSON, AZ

" FEAR NOT ONLY RESTRICT ME, BUT OVERWHELM AND CONTROL ME. I HAVE EXPERIENCED FEAR IN VARIOUS FORMS , BUT DESPITE THE SPECTRUM OF FEAR, ITS GRIP WOULD WEAKEN ME EVERY TIME." grew up surrounded with people I love, people I became aware that uncertainties about my who love me, and a loving God. Ever since I was relationship with Jesus were subconsciously a little girl I was raised as a Christian. evident through my submissiveness to Satan Of course, at the time, I was unable to grasp the through fear. My relationship with God had been grand concept of living for an immeasurable God hindered and was not blossoming like I kept at a young age. Uncertainty seeped into my soul telling myself it was. multiple times and I have not, nor will I ever, I yearned for the same comfort in Christ I had understand the entirety of the greatest love story when I was little. There were times I blamed God ever to be shared with me until I meet Him face to until I was convicted by the testament that finding face. comfort in Christ was instantly available. It was Despite uncertainties, I never once questioned my choice; Jesus was not only waiting for me, but God’s existence as a child because it was calling out to me through every opportunity or comfortable and simply agreeable due to its experience I passed along the way, reminding me presence in my life through family and church. that He was there.

Not until I came upon fear, temptations, and When I graduated from high school I not only convictions through Satan’s nasty grip did I came to terms with my convictions, but naturally, realize for myself how real a concept Jesus truly was flooded with a combination of fear and is. When I was ten years old I gave my heart and opportunity. And I had to choose, fear or life to Jesus and have grown, matured, regressed, opportunity? “The Lord himself will fight for you. fallen, and repeated every day since.

Just stay calm.” (Exodus 14:14) gently screamed Fear is restrictive. It’s a bully, it’s a lie, and it at me on a Sunday, and my uncertainties were pulls you away from Jesus. It tells you, you can’t hushed instantly. do something. I have let fear not only restrict me, This verse enunciated everything God has but overwhelm and control me. I have shown me ever since I gave my life to Him. experienced fear in various forms, but despite the Though there are times I still feel anxious, I am spectrum of fear, its grip would weaken me every reminded that trusting in the Lord and being time. stripped of fear through Him is the most freeing I have always been a fearful person. I would experience. fear mere, insignificant situations. The fear living I have not only grown as a person, but have within me was killing me. It would cause strengthened my relationship with Christ by hesitation and doubt in the world, in me, and in surrendering uncertainties to a God I am certain our God, who created both, that I would willingly about. pass experiences by.

Through Jesus’ grace I reconciled with the truth I wouldn’t submerge myself into beautiful that being fearful was much more than feeling things and incredible opportunities because of scared and that it is a masked way of lacking trust selfish fear. Anxiousness kept me from complete in God. Though at times I still waver, I can now happiness. In high school I quickly realized that I shout with confidence, “Here am I. Send me!” was not the little girl who believed in God and (Isaiah 6:8) thought that was enough.

I

PHOTO BY CARRIE ZIMMER

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Ph otograph er: rach ael con sau l M odel : ken d ra camp Makeup: amber silva Wardrobe: wysh bou ti q u e Locati on : n orth cou n ty san d i eg o

AMBER SILVA Makeup Artist San Diego, CA

WHY JESUS? I grew up in a religion that was very works based. A lot of fear, anxiety, worry, and just constantly feeling that I wasn't good enough no matter how hard I tried. Almost 5 years ago someone I worked with randomly told me he was praying for me. Little did I know how drastically my life was going to change in the most amazing way. I felt and witnessed the power of prayer and the power of Jesus' Spirit changing me from the inside out. I found a true relationship with Jesus. Having a relationship with my Creator and Savior has freed me from the bondage of trying to be perfect or feeling like I had to know everything. Spending time getting to know Jesus and developing a strong relationship with Him has given me peace and helps me daily to trust Him with everything.

WHY MAKEUP? Makeup is fun and exciting to me. Makeup is my art. I love the power makeup has to change a person's personal outlook. I love creating looks with my clients that are specific to them. A little touch of makeup can sometimes be the one thing that shows someone their own beauty if they have never felt it or help them to feel it again. I believe when you feel beautiful it really shows and can completely change the way you treat yourself as well as how you treat others.

THOUGHTS ON MODESTY AND FASHION? Every one is an individual we are all different and God loves each one of us for who we are. Jesus's gift to us is that we know we have his mercy and forgiveness. Lamentations 3:23 "Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning." Fashion is a way for us to express and glorify God and show Him how much we appreciate the individuality he has given each one of us.

BEST PART ABOUT LIVING IN SAN DIEGO? San Diego's diversity makes it a great place to be creative. We also get to enjoy summer-like weather year round.

ONE DAY WHEN YOUR LEGACY IS FULLY WRITTEN, WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE THE LAST SENTENCE OF THAT LEGACY TO SAY AND WHY? "Amber was a loving, caring, humble, and selfless person. She was passionately devoted to her kids and was a loving supportive wife. She desired more than anything to show Jesus's love to others so they can feel the incredible life changing peace that comes with having a relationship with Jesus Christ as she did."

makeupartist sandiego,ca

ZACK LOVATO rapper‐fillmore,ca

"MY FAITH IN JESUS IS REALLY HUGE"

E XPLAIN YOUR STYLE OF MUSIC?

M Y STYLE OF MUSIC IS A HIP HOP/RAP FORM . I SPEAK ABOUT TOPICS OF PERSONAL EXPERIENCES , MOTIVATION , INSPIRATION AND RELATIONSHIPS .

WHAT ARE YOUR MUSICAL INFLUENCES?

THE ONLY RAPPER WHO INFLUENCE ME IS THE PRE -D EATHROW (RECORDS) TUPAC. B EFORE D EATHROW, TUPAC HAD SONGS WHERE THEY INSPIRED HIS COMMUNITY AND BROUGHT TOPICS INTO DISCUSSION THAT WASN ' T BROUGHT UP BEFORE .

WHY DO YOU PERSONALLY CHOOSE J ESUS?

I PERSONALLY CHOOSE J ESUS BECAUSE I HAVE FAITH IN H IM . M Y FAITH IN J ESUS IS REALLY HUGE , WHENEVER I' M DOWN OR STUCK I JUST PRAY TO H IM FOR GUIDANCE AND TO LEAD ME DOWN THE RIGHT PATH FOR ME .

WHAT DO YOU ASPIRE TO ACHIEVE WITH MUSIC?

TO DELIVER MY MESSAGE THROUGH MY SONGS WHETHER ITS MOTIVATION , INSPIRATION OR SHARING MY EXPERIENCES . WE ALL HAVE A MESSAGE TO SHARE WITH THE WORLD AND I' M TRYING TO GET MINE OUT THERE WITH MUSIC.

BEING BOLDLY RE AL

I

THEREFORE I WILL BOAST ALL THE MORE GLADLY ABOUT MY WEAKNESSES, SO THAT C HRIST’ S POWER MAY REST ON ME.

B Y ANNAMARIE DORRIS don’t know about you but I have been going through a very hard season. The endurance it takes to daily give my life over to Jesus is challenging at times.

Choosing to follow Jesus and making that choice daily, and hundreds of times throughout the day, is hard. Everything in this world fights against those choices. If you have times where you feel like your life just keeps getting harder, like an uphill battle, know that you are not alone!

Whether people in your life are able to be honest with you and just say, “yeah I am really struggling right now”, or do they pretend like it is always good. Know that struggling is NOT A WEAKNESS, and being honest about your struggles is a strength!

In 2 Corinthians 12:9, “But He said to me, My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”

Now Paul, who wrote Corinthians, wrote them around A.D. 50-67. Throughout all those years and the many translations of the Bible I believe some meanings of words have been “lost in translation.”

For as boasting in today’s terminology means “talk with excessive pride.” When I think about that phrase I see a person standing on a table shouting. I truly do not believe that Paul was saying go and proclaim to everyone all the hard trials in your life. Instead I feel it is just being boldly real; real with yourself and real with others.

When you are able to be honest about what is going on that allows you to be consciously aware of what is making you feel the emotion(s) you are feeling. Jesus is able to know our thoughts but He desires a relationship with us.

I think there are times in our lives where our relationship with Jesus can feel like the hardest relationship of all. Maybe it is just me who gets these overwhelming feelings like I can never be good enough, or never get it just right.

Relationships take work, time and effort. I promise you even just praying or whispering “Jesus or Jesus help me”; you are already putting that work, time and effort into your relationship with Jesus! Thankfully there is God’s sufficient grace that is always there for us.

What is important to Him is you talking to Him and seeking wise counsel throughout every season of your life. It is not all about getting it right it is more about getting real with ourselves so we are able to grow deeper with Jesus.

Constantly then, being able to live in the fullness of Christ because He meets us just as we are- broken, hurting, valley, mountain-top, joyful, and every other place in-between.

Choosing to follow Jesus may not always be easy but we can trust that we always have a cheerleader, the Creator of the universe, who is the only one who truly knows every part of us and loves us so much just as we are. There is peace, that only He can give, that goes beyond our understanding.

He is ready with open arms to greet us every day especially during the harder ones.

supportingmissionariesbytellingtheir storiesthroughphotography&film

www.photographyinmissions.org

I

WHAVE HY I DON' SEX W AM I MORE OF A MAN IF I HAVE SEX WITH LOTS OF WOMEN,

By Jesse Anaya

f I have sex with her now, I’m taking something away from her that she can’t get back. If I have sex with her before He tells me it’s blessed, I’m separating myself and her away from Him. I don’t want to have sex with her because I’m not married.

If I have sex with her now, she’s giving me her body and I’ll always have a piece of her with me. And when I do get married, if I’m not married to her, a part of her will be with me when I’m with my wife.

I don’t want to have sex with her because she’s not my wife.

As I’ve matured, I realize what my intentions are towards women the older that I get. When I was younger I could playfully flirt, harmlessly compliment and quietly pursue, but what was my purpose?

To get in her pants? To marry her? To have children with her and spend Christmas morning with her mom and dad?

Was my purpose to spend the rest of my life with her and wake up every day with her next to me? Do I want to hear about her day and listen to her struggles and be invested into her life, not just now but forever?

Or is my intent to pursue her just to have sex with her because I’m really not interested in hearing about her day or spending Christmas morning with her mom and dad and I have no long run

intention to be invested to her for the rest of her life? Is my intention to pursue her because I find her physically attractive and my lust for her blocks my conscience for what I know is right and wrong?

I know deep down she’s not the one I’ll marry, but I think she’s hot and I want to experience what it feels like to be intimate with her.

I tell her what she wants to hear, spend time with her, build her trust and then have sex with her, and after I get it, my lust for her is quenched and she no longer captivates me. I’ve had my taste and I can move on.

Is this the man I’ve become or am I the man who I desire to be, the man who wants to wait to have sex with a woman because I care about my walk and her walk with Jesus?

Who am I? If I am sincere in my desire to walk with Jesus, I know that I can’t hurt one of His daughters. I know that I can’t quietly pursue just to play with her head. I know that I can’t have sex with her and then leave her because in doing so I’m separating her from Him. I can’t hurt her.

He loves her in the way I’m going to love my own daughter one day. And He loves her in ways that I’ll never be able to.

So when I hurt her, use her, take a part of her body, trick her into believing I care

'WITH T WANT TO HER. OR AM I MORE OF A MAN IF I' M NOT HAVING SEX AT ALL? about her, I’m hurting God. Am I prepared to hurt God? Would I want a boy to hurt my own little girl, the daughter who I await to meet one day?

I think about the scripture Ezekiel 36:26 “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.”

If I live for the world, I want to have sex with her outside of marriage because I have heart of stone. I’m insensitive to her heart, to her needs and to her relationship with Jesus. My object is to conquer her, and by conquer her I mean getting from her the one thing she holds on to most, the intimacy between that of her and a man.

But if I live for Jesus, He’s taken away my heart of stone and has given me a heart of flesh. I may desire to have sex with her but my heart beats for God, which makes me want to honor her as He would want me to.

If I honor her in a Godly way it means I value her, it means I respect her, it means I want her to be closer to Jesus, not sin with me by having sex outside of marriage.

I’m a single Christian guy and I think about the woman I’ll marry one day. I don’t want to lead her into sin, I want to lead her into Heaven. I want to lead her to Christ. I want to pray with her and pray

" I TELL HER WHAT SHE WANTS TO HEAR, SPEND TIME WITH HER, BUILD HER TRUST AND THEN HAVE SEX WITH HER, AND AFTER I GET IT, MY LUST FOR HER IS QUENCHED AND SHE NO LONGER CAPTIVATES ME. I’VE HAD MY TASTE AND I CAN MOVE ON. " for her. I want to love her as Christ has commanded me to.

I want to experience sex with her as her husband because it’ll be blessed by God. And with that blessing comes an intimacy, a trust, a passion and love between us that can only be experienced when our union is blessed by Him. There could be 10,000 girls lined up to have sex with me, but none of them will reach the intimacy, trust, passion and love that I experience with my wife because more than the physical act, we’re connecting in the spirit and our spirits are being joined together as one for God. I don’t want to have sex with her until I marry her because I already care about her and love her. I don’t want to have sex until marriage because she is worth the wait.

Jennifer Hulsey Drummer - Tempe, AZ

"I DRUM TO BRING HIM GLORY. " DO YOU FEEL YOU' RE TREATED DIFFERENTLY BECAUSE YOU' RE A DRUMMER WHO' S A GIRL? Unfortunately, yes. Since I learned to drum at such a young age, I wasn't too concerned about how my instrument choice would affect my level of popularity. I didn't realize how that choice would set me apart from other girls. But it did... and I got attention. Like any teenage girl, I thought the attention was nice. But as I got older, I noticed the recognition wasn't positive or necessarily dependent on how good of a player I was; I received attention because I was doing something typically uncommon for a girl--which seemingly made me cooler or more attractive.

In an effort to fight for gender equality in my own little way, I started working even harder at my skill to prove that I could be just as good as anyone of the opposite sex. I've spent nearly ten years and countless hours pursuing my passion. Not because it makes me "cool," but because I absolutely love it.

HOW HAS YOUR MINDSET TOWARDS DRUMMING CHANGED SINCE YOU BECAME A C HRISTIAN? Before I became a Christian, I would practice and perform to showcase my talent. The praise fed my ego and the attention was temporarily satisfying. Now that I've accepted the true purpose God has for me, I drum to bring Him glory. I believe God gave me this unique ability out of love, as a gift... not for me to pridefully excel at it and get all the credit. This realization has brought me so much freedom. Now Im just thankful For having the privilege of getting to create music.

HOW DID YOU GET INTO DRUMMING? When I was 10 years old, my cousin suggested I learn how to play the drums so we could start a band together. I started with concert percussion, took private lessons for jazz drumset, and then went into marching band where I played in the drumline. I became heavily involved in marching percussion theatre (WGI) and drum corps (DCI) throughout college. These sports incorporate my love for drumming, dance, and drama to create theatrical performances that draw audiences from all over the world. Needless to say, my cousin and I never started a band.

TO ALL THE READERS LIVING IN DIFFERENT STATES, WHAT' S IT LIKE GROWING UP IN AZ? I think anyone who has lived in Arizona long enough would agree that the heat is hard to get used to. I’m pretty sure we’ve broken a new record every summer for the past 10 years. Other than that, it’s pretty alright. Phoenix has a flourishing art, music, and restaurant scene. With all the cultural development in the past few years, AZ has become a pretty exciting place be!

HOW DOES JESUS INFLUENCE YOU? I would say the freedom I have in Jesus is most influential in my everyday life. He is constantly reminding me that my identity is not in my accomplishments or my imperfections. It doesn't matter how many mistakes I make or how outstanding I become-- His love for me will never change.

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H ai r/M akeu p: ch el sey cooper Location: phoenix,az

WHAT IS ONE WORSHIP GATHERING? ONE Worship Gatherings are vertical worship gatherings that have been taking place all over the San Diego for the last year. Worship leaders/teams from all over San Diego sign up for time slots and contribute to 24 hours (or longer) of non-stop worship expression. These gatherings include many different streams, denominations and fellowships for the purpose of coming together as one Body to worship our amazing God. They also move around from city to city.

HOW DID IT GET CREATED? In 2012, after praying and asking God how I could contribute to a move of His Spirit here in San Deigo, I felt that I was to begin cultivating relationship and community between worship leaders/musicians/artists, etc all over the region. ONE is really the expression and fruit of this worship community. We had our first 24 hour gathering under the name ONE Worship Gatherings Feb 28 2014 at Grace Chapel of the Coast in Oceanside, CA. After that, churches all over began to ask if they could host gatherings. We did monthly gatherings throughout 2014, moving from city to city, church to church.

HOW IS JESUS COMMUNICATED THROUGH YOUR MINISTRY? Matthew 22:37-40 is a key scripture within the ONE community. The gatherings are vertical, meaning that it isn’t so much worship “leading” but simply worship.

Teams are invited to simply worship God from their hearts without being concerned about leading people. It’s more of a David’s Tabernacle approach. We don’t put lyrics up on a screen, the band sets up “in the round” style (band in a circle in the middle of the room facing each other). We really put an emphasis on the first part of that passage from Matthew, “love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul and all your mind.” I believe that if we make that our first priority, than the second part, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” will be the natural result. That is exactly what we have seen happen at these gatherings.

Jesus is communicated powerfully by His own love that is expressed through the people in this community. Prayer, encouragement, relationships cultivated, sharing of hearts, physical healings, reconciliations, these are common things that happen at ONE gatherings.

HOW

DO YOU FEEL MUSIC AND WORSHIP INFLUENCES ONE ' S WALK WITH JESUS?

I know that it’s had an incredible impact on my own journey over the years. I do however believe it’s important that we all understand the difference between the activity of our worship and the expression of our worship. Music is not the definition of worship. The activity of our very lives, moment by moment, breath to breath is our true worship. I enjoy all the expressions of worship; music, art, dance, etc. They all minister to me, encourage me and spark my faith but they are ultimately empty if I am not living the activity of worship. Singing someone a love song has little meaning if there’s no activity of love to go with it. Expression that comes from the overflow of activity however is a powerful thing.

WHAT

IS YOUR VISION FOR REACHING S AN D IEGO?

ONE WORSHIP GATHERING

My heart is really to see the Body of Christ here in San Diego come together. I believe that happens through real relationship.

Jesus said that His disciples would be known by their love for one another. That’s what I want to see. ONE is just a small part of that vision. I know there is a lot more to come.

SanDiego,CA Director:HenryHaney

NEWLYWEDS

W

"I TURNED AROUND AND WHAT FOLLOWED WAS THE ABSOLUTE LAST THING I THOUGHT WOULD COME OUT OF HIS MOUTH, “UM, BABE, YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU NO MATTER WHAT BUT, UM… WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO SHAVE YOUR ARMPITS?"

B Y CHELSEY COOPER e were getting ready in the same bathroom and it was hot in there because Nathan had just gotten out of the shower. I had started to do my hair while thinking about the nights festivities and feeling particularly romantic that this was our first married New Years.

In between Taylor Swift songs I was thanking the Lord for my handsome man and trying to think of what I was going to wear. Every now and then Nathan and I would catch each other’s gaze and I would gush with love and sappiness.

Then the moment came… I had my arms above my head, backcombing my hair when Nathan came up behind me and looked uneasy. I turned around and what followed was the absolute last thing I thought would come out of his mouth, “Um, babe, you know I love you no matter what but, um…when are you going to shave your armpits?”

CONTEXT: I had previously been a wax specialist at a well-known body waxing company, so growing out body hair had become normal to me. I had intended on getting waxed soon but after taking a different career path I was suddenly struck by how expensive getting waxed regularly was, so as I saved money to get my body hair removed, it just kept on growing.

All the comfort and openness I had built with my husband cracked under the hammer of humiliation. I was suddenly acutely aware that I had forgotten to brush my teeth that morning and I felt as if all femininity had been drained from my body.

Hot tears immediately filled my eyes as my defenses went up and my arms came down. How long had he been thinking this? What else was he unhappy with?

Did he still find me attractive? I couldn’t figure out if I was madder at him for saying something or myself for pushing him to that point. I slammed the door in his face and proceeded to shave my underarms.

I didn’t know what to do next, I felt like the evening was ruined before it began. When I came out of the bathroom I couldn’t look at Nathan; I had never been embarrassed in front of him before. I thought nothing was supposed to make me feel embarrassed around him; he was my “person” and knew what he was signing up for.

What I didn’t take into account was his side of things. Nathan loved me well, found me attractive and felt as blessed to be with me as I did with him.

Yet my pendulum of comfort had swung too far to one side, where there was once a time where I wouldn’t be caught dead without a full face of makeup and a perfectly executed outfit, I had now reveled in his unconditional acceptance.

It was freeing in a lot of ways, to realize that Nathan still wanted to be with me, love me, and marry me whether or not I was dressed up or down, hair done or undone, ate healthy or had cake for breakfast…I soaked it up.

The only other person who had given me such approval was Jesus and I found His love reaffirmed for me through Nathan. I found this love, comfort and freedom that was from the Lord in a tangible human being and I ran with it to the point of neglecting the needs, wants and desires of my husband.

And yes, all this is a snap-shot story about how I was asked to shave my underarms.

I’m so grateful for this story now. It’s given me such a clear picture of what real vulnerability is and I love that there’s humor intertwined. God showed me a much greater heart issue through that experience than just needing to up my hygiene game, and acknowledging it has brought a renewed sense of security and openness to my marriage.

We’re not without hard conversations and sticky situations, but those are the things refining us into the people and couple we were created to be.

EAST COAST WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO WITNESS IS A COLLECTION OF MUSIC,

FASHION AND THE STORIES OF REAL PEOPLE SEEKING TO LIVE FOR JESUS EAST OF THE MISSISSIPPI RIVER.

JESUS. MUSIC. FASHION.

HEATHER ALBANO PHOTOGRAPHER - NEW B ERN, NC WWW.HEATHERELIZABETHP HOTOS . COM

"L ONG AFTER A WOMAN HAS BEEN IN FRONT OF MY CAMERA , I WOULD LOVE FOR THEM TO CONTINUE FEELING THAT THEY AREA CRAFTED BY THE CREATOR, HAVE A UNIQUE BEAUTY AND A UNIQUE PURPOSE. "

Why Jesus?

Because He is everything good. He is truth. And He is love. A life without Jesus would be one without true freedom and, for me, one without inspiration! When I see Jesus alive in others and alive in our natural world, I feel closest to Him and closest to my art.

Best part about living on the east coast?

Well, I am not an East Coast native I must admit.

I grew up in Chicago and was brought to Eastern NC by my husband’s job a few years ago. We love it here! The weather is temperamental, but beautiful and I am grateful to be so close to the ocean and a variety of landscapes. What we have loved most about living here, however, are the people that we have met. God has blessed us with Two Rivers Church where we have met our wonderfully authentic, honest and driven group of friends! They come from all over the US with all different backgrounds, but we share a common goal of striving to be more like Christ What distinguishes you from other photographers?

I specialize in women’s portraiture that is inspired by fashion editorials and focuses on natural beauty. My absolute favorite photos are always those that show a woman’s natural beauty with very little makeup and simple, effortless styling of both wardrobe and location. I’m a low maintenance type of gal, so I try to keep that in my photography as well. I think the combination of natural settings, natural styling, natural posing and natural light helps differentiate my work. I also offer women an alternative to traditional boudoir photography. Boudoir is often far too sexualized and plays to a misconstrued idea of

also offer women an alternative to traditional boudoir photography. Boudoir is often far too sexualized and plays to a misconstrued idea of how a woman is meant to be viewed. The women that gravitate to my Intimates sessions are those who see their beauty as something meant for themselves, rather than to be defined and abused by our culture. These sessions also focus on fashion and an emotional and feminine connection rather than a sexualized one.

To someone who doesn’t know Jesus, what would you want them to know?

I would love for those to know the Jesus that I follow—one who isn’t concerned with where we’ve been or what we’ve done, but the Jesus that is interested in our hearts. So interested in our hearts, in fact, that He is willing to take everything that weighs ours down! He takes our fears, sadness, grief, heartache and He offers freedom and tells us that we are enough!

What do you want your legacy to be?

My grandparents have long been a beautiful example of living with a legacy. They are still with us and they live with a steadfast love for God and a servant’s heart; always thinking of others, always giving and always serving. I’d love to be known for those things. And I’d love for my work to speak of God’s love and beauty.

Long after a woman has been in front of my camera, I would love for them to continue feeling that they area crafted by the Creator, have a unique beauty and a unique purpose. While the world feeds us so many lies, I love getting to help women see that truth in themselves.

M ODEL: CHELSEA MITCHELL Ph otog raph er: heather albano LOCATION : NEW BERN, NC

Ph otograph er: tayl or campbel l

KATRINABARCLAY S INGER/S ONGWRITER - B IRMINGHAM, AL

I

B Y ANGELIC EDITOR was referred to Katrina Barclay by a friend of hers who I had met on my trip to Atlanta this past winter. Her friend told me that Katrina sang amazing.

Jesus Music Fashion The Event is hitting the South in April and I needed legit musicians from the South to play at this event, and after Googling Katrina Barclay and hearing her music for the first time on-line, I knew immediately that I needed to contact her.

She was talented. Really talented. She did sing amazing. There was a beautiful rawness to her sound when she belted out that separated her from the others.

A broken emotion attached itself to her lyrics and you felt what she sang, you felt what she wrote.

I played her music for other musicians in my circle of friends. I played her music for the other writers in the magazine. I felt the urge to play her music for people because something inside told me I needed to.

Over Skype, Katrina Barclay and I did an interview for Angelic and what I learned was that this powerful voice was a kind of shy Southern girl hailing from Alabama. She was from the Deep South and in her southern twang she told me her story of living for Jesus. She pulled back the surface and communicated the story of this gift He had given her, this gift to make Him known through music.

ANGELIC: Why Jesus?

Barclay: I had no other choice. When I finally broke down and came to Him, and found myself in that situation where there wasn't anything else except reach out to someone, and He was there.

He just changed my life completely. I had

exhausted every resource for happiness, peace or joy, and I couldn't find it. I wasn't even looking for Him and He just came on the scene and changed my life.

ANGELIC: What was growing up in the South like for you?

Barclay: My family actually had a bluegrass gospel group so there were times I was at church sometimes 3 times a weekend. I did the whole Sunday school thing. I kind of always knew the Gospel, but it didn't really affect my life until I was 18. I knew all about the rules, and how you were supposed to act and be, but it didn't really touch my soul.

ANGELIC: When did music come in for you?

Barclay: I started out singing jingles on the commercials on the TV before I was learning to talk. I don't even remember a time when I wasn't singing. I did mostly singing up until I was about 15. My grandpa taught me how to play on the mandolin. I really learned by hearing, copying and just watching what my grandfather was doing. Around the age of 17, I picked up the guitar. My grandfather played the guitar my whole life. I picked up, my grandpa showed me a few things and I just fell in love with it. It was my instrument.

ANGELIC: When did you decide you wanted to pursue music?

Barclay: God totally blessed me with the ability to write a song. Before I became a serious Christian, I never really wrote music but it was then that I decided to really begin writing music. I helped my mom write a song and I told her I didn't know what I was doing and my mom told me if God wants you to write a song, you'll write a song. My early songs were love songs to Him.

What's Your Status?

C

B Y HEATHER KURTZ

an I be completely transparent with you for a minute? The word status has wearied my heart. Status: One word, six letters, small in character, yet so important to our generation.

We are a body of one, yet we allow this small word to divide us into subcategories and define us; single or married, young or elderly, joyful or oppressed, pregnant or childless, homeowner or renter, worker or student and the list could go on and on.

And in all of this, unbeknownst to us, this constant defining of ourselves has led us to an alter where we have offered up our status in return for an opinion; an opinion of man to dictate where we stand in life.

We operate under our emotional state of life, rather than under every word that comes out of the mouth of God that proclaims truth over us (Matthew 4:4). And so we walk either secure in our status or miserable in our placement.

But I do not want to be a generation close to status and far from Jesus, living under the authority of this word, because Jesus never did. He never allowed his placement to dictate his stance.

No, he made himself lowly, bending at the feet of his disciples, associating himself with the Samaritan woman, and standing between the prostitute and her murderers.

And in response to this question of status, never did He refer to Himself as lacking, never did He refer to Himself as single and never did He see Himself through the lens of other people.

Instead, He saw His stance through the word of God that He tied to His tongue. The word that God spoke over Him as He was baptized, “This is my son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.” Matthew 3:17.

What did Jesus believe over Himself? I am God’s. I am loved, and I am delighted in. This is Jesus’ everlasting banner, the banner that didn’t die with a spoken word from God but a banner that He sewed into every changing status of His life.

64 ANGELICMAG.com

"THIS CONSTANT DEFINING OF OURSELVES

HAS LED US TO AN ALTER WHERE WE HAVE OFFERED UP OUR STATUS IN RETURN FOR AN OPINION; AN OPINION OF MAN TO DICTATE WHERE WE STAND IN LIFE. "

While fasting, His banner held high (Matt 4:4). While on trial for His life, His testimony never changed (Mark 14:61-61).

So then what should we say in the face of this adversity? How do we awaken a heart that has been shaped by the definition of status, to be set free?

Hear the word of God and recite it.

“He who has ears, let them hear what the Spirit says” Rev. 3:22.

“Let God be true and every human being a liar” Romans 3:2 These words read so harshly across the page at first glance. Let God be true and every human being a liar?

But I am reminded, in this word, yes, if man is true then every struggle, anxiety, brokenness and scorching word spoken will always leave us splashed into a puddle reflecting on the ground.

Yet, if God is true, and true indeed he is, we can allow God to draw us into the clouds, into the heavenly realms to be dropped like the dew from heaven, like manna on the ground, sweet in taste and nourishing to our souls.

Are you tempted to believe underneath the yoke of your status, underneath the title of your position and under the emotions tied as shackles around your neck?

Lift your head.

"For every look at self, take ten looks at Christ." – Robert Murray M’Cheyne.

For every look at your status, take a look at who Christ says you are. Because your status is but a stance, but your belief is your wellspring of life.

Lift up your banner, for no word of mankind will prevail over Jesus’ written word over you. You belong not to man, but to God. Live freely in Him.

Marriage & Romance

R

MAEGAN DOCKERY RUNNINGWITHRANDOM. BLOGSPOT. COM

omance is not the easiest word to define, just like love or happiness. Typically, these words mean different things for different people, and that’s okay. I think that’s what makes these words so mysterious and wonderful.

When we have a memory or a moment or something tangible and we can say, “This is love, or romance, or happiness,” it is just one of those incredibly satisfying things. When we can recall a first kiss or a treasured gift or the first time we realized how much God loves us, it is a sweet, sweet feeling.

Not only is romance hard to define, it is also everchanging. What I would have said was “romance” ten years ago, when I was a freshman in high school and had my very first boyfriend, is astronomically different from what I would say romance is now.

A lot of people told me marriage would change our relationship, that it would be boring or we wouldn’t date anymore or there would be no surprises once he “put a ring on it.”

Those people weren’t lying. Marriage did change our relationship. Sometimes it is boring. Sometimes we don’t go on a “real” date for weeks. But marriage is amazing. It’s fun and weird and awkward and wonderful because we’re in this together.

My husband and I started dating over five years ago. We didn’t have a super romantic beginning (I told him I was cold, he did not offer me his jacket), but we got there eventually.

He offers me his jacket now. He buys me flowers for no reason. He cooks dinner and I wash the dishes, almost every night. He tells me I’m pretty when I first wake up with bedhead and morning breath.

To someone who is dating or single, these things might seem ridiculous. They don’t sound particularly romantic, do they? Romance is all about fancy dinners and long moonlit walks on the beach, right?

Maybe. I definitely find those things romantic.

When you get married, does romance change?

I love getting dressed up and going out with my husband for a nice dinner. I also love coming home from that fancy dinner, putting on our pajamas, and watching Sherlock on Netflix together. That’s romantic to me, too.

For me, romance is all about what my husband and I get to do together. It’s not about the dressing up or spending money or those Instagrammable moments we are able to capture. It’s not about the kind of food we eat or whether or not he opened my car door for me.

It’s about sharing experiences with each other. It’s about growing in our relationship with Christ together.

It’s about loving each other more and more each day we spend together.

It might not seem particularly romantic when we are eating dinner off paper plates in front of Netflix in our pajamas on a Tuesday night. It might not seem romantic when he wakes up early to take the first shower so I can sleep a little longer. It might not seem romantic when date night becomes a nap together after a long week.

But it is. It’s romantic to us because we are enjoying each other’s company, growing closer to each other and, in turn, Christ.

Marriage isn’t always pretty and sometimes it really isn’t romantic. Sometimes there are dirty socks on the floor and angry words. Sometimes there are disappointments and frustrations. But these things are a part of life. They’re real.

I love my husband, and he loves me. We love each other through the bad hair days, the mistakes, the fancy dinners, the fun vacations, and everything in between. We love each other as we work with our youth group together or do missions alongside each other.

We love each other through the good times and the bad, just like we vowed to. And if that’s not romantic, I don’t know what is.

ANDREW CUNNINGHAM S INGER/S ONGWRITER - ATLANTA, GA

"PUTTING THE TRUTH INTO LYRIC AND MELODY IS LIKE NOTHING ELSE IN THE WORLD."

Why Jesus Simply put, Jesus has completely changed my life. People ask "Why Jesus and not something or someone else?" The honest truth is that for me there is nothing, and no one other than Jesus for me.

Not only am I forgiven my sins by Jesus death on the cross, but I am also redeemed back to right relationship with the father. That relationship is so deep, so intimate, and so satisfying. Because of Jesus I also get to play a small part in the Kingdom of God and the story being written on the earth. It is mind blowing to try and soak all that in. For me, that's why I chose Jesus.

Why Music Music has an ability to reach people like few things in this world. Often times our fondest memories have music connected to them. Songs that in many ways were the soundtrack to seasons and times of our lives. I think that music is able to reach a place in our hearts that nothing else can. I think that's why God made music, and its the reason I love music. Putting the truth into lyric and melody is like nothing else in the world. Sometimes I write songs specifically for people in my life. However most times I write music because it stirs my own heart and draws me closer to Jesus.

What influences you creatively?

Other music, especially instrumental music influences me creatively. Listening to gorgeous music, or epic scores really draws out the creativity in me. I would also say that Gods word, and the life around me has a huge impact on me creatively. When I look at the world around me I try to see it differently. I try to look at life and see the details and deeper meaning of Gods handiwork. I think that the character of God can be seen in creation and when I see more of who he is, it inspires me to write songs and make music. I think that creative people have the ability to see things differently and deeper than others sometimes. That vision allows us to express things that others may feel but not know how to verbalize or express. Thats what music and creativity are for me.

Goals with Music?

Simply put, I want to write music that has meaning to it. And I want as many people to hear those songs as possible. It's my heart that through the songs I write, people would be drawn into a deeper relationship with Jesus, and find more of his life. Im not really interested in writing some huge creative conglomeration of words that makes no sense. I want to use the power of lyric and melody to write songs that deeply connect people to the love and life of Jesus.

Question for Jesus?

I would love to just sit and ask Jesus to tell me stories from his perspective. Like I would love to know what he was thinking when he did some of the things he did. When we read the bible and see the signs and wonders that Jesus did, it makes me think that somewhere in the back of his head Jesus had to be thinking, "Oh you think I can't make this cripple dude right here get up and walk? Watch this!" Or like when Jesus told the disciples to go get a fish and it would have a silver coin in its mouth.

th e real movemen t "OUR VISION

FOR THE COLLEGE DEMOGRAPHIC IS TO CREATE A CULTURE OF VULNERABILITY, A REALNESS THAT UPSETS SOCIETAL NORMS THAT ISN'T THERE CURRENTLY."

AT LAN TA THE - REALMOVEMENT. COM

CALEB H AWKINS (LEFT) CAMILO B UCHANAN (RIGHT) COF OUNDERS OF THE REAL M OVEMENT.

WHAT IS THE REAL MOVEMENT? We exist to show people the real Jesus, who came to seek and save the lost, because every human life deserves to know that they are loved by Love Himself, Jesus Christ. TRM is the very essence of our hope for our generation, that through us you will catch a glimpse of who He truly is, and not who this world assumes He is.

WHAT' S YOUR VISION FOR SEEING THE COLLEGE DEMOGRAPHIC REACHED FOR JESUS? Our vision for the college demographic as a whole, is that they would come to see that Jesus's heart is not to condemn them but to save them, and that He can save anyone, including them. Our vision for the college demographic is to create a culture of vulnerability, a realness that upsets societal norms that isn't there currently. And our ultimate vision, whether through our reps, events, or the website is to see Revival.

WHAT MAKES YOUR MINISTRY DIFFERENT OR UNIQUE FROM OTHER COLLEGE BASED OUTREACHES? We kind of see ourselves as the "anti-college ministry". Not in the sense that other college ministries are bad or wrong or we don't like them. We're just doing something, different. My favorite thing to hear from people who first attend hangouts is that they've "never seen anything like this before Why do you personally choose Jesus?

My testimony is on the website but in short, He chose me. He adopted me, someone who was opposed to Him, and allowed me to see His beauty. I tried to run from this kind of love, but it captured me. Jesus didn't make me good. He made me alive.

WHAT ARE WAYS PEOPLE CAN GET INVOLVED AND/OR CONTRIBUTE TO THE REAL MOVEMENT? We are at 3 schools in Georgia right now and all those reps came to us organically. We're not trying to force ourselves anywhere. No matter who you are you can tell us your narrative. Everyone has one, and everyone's matters. We want to hear them. If you're at a school where we are, meet with a rep or go to a hangout or bible study; we'd love to have you! And if you'd like to contribute financially, we have several options set up on our website that we hope meets you where you are at if you feel lead to give.

JEFFREY JOHNSON ATLANTA, GA

22

years. That is how long it took for my prideful heart to finally be overwhelmed by the love and grace of Jesus.

Before Jesus, the one thing that anchored and drove my life was the question, "How can I make MY name great?"

Everything I did was centered around lifting myself up and promoting my name.

It did not matter who I hurt or who I put down, because everything was all about me. I went to church most of the time while I was growing up and knew about the concept of Jesus; but really it meant nothing to me.

God was just an afterthought.

I was far more concerned with my life, my dreams, and my goals. And as a result I lived with an angry pride inside of me, determined to become the very best, no matter what the cost.

Sports were my identity because that was the best way for me to feel better than other people. I built myself up through them and always looked down on others. There was no real love or joy in my heart. So as soon as I got to college and sports were removed from my life, everything came crashing down around me.

I began to realize that the foundation everything I thought I was, had been built on very shaky ground. My identity was gone. Even after finding a spot on a baseball team for a short period in college I still felt very empty inside and weighed down by a huge burden.

During this whole time I still knew who God was; but because of the extreme amount of pride I had, I was never able to fully let go of my life and surrender to Christ. I felt as if it was completely up to me... If I just kept working hard enough then I could take control of my own destiny and I would have happiness.

But it never came. No matter what I did, I never felt fulfilled…But then Jesus came…

I can still remember the moment when I was completely overwhelmed and in awe when my eyes were fully opened to Christ and who He is. Jesus completely shattered my hardened heart…a heart that was filled with pride, greed, and lust.

He then replaced those things with His love, kindness,

" I WAS FAR MORE

CONCERNED WITH MY LIFE, MY DREAMS, AND MY GOALS. A ND AS A RESULT I LIVED WITH AN ANGRY PRIDE INSIDE OF ME, DETERMINED TO BECOME THE VERY BEST, NO MATTER WHAT THE COST. "

and joy. I began to realize that it was not all up to me in life. Jesus came down to this earth and literally died for me. He did this so that I could be free from all the heavy burdens of life I had been carrying for so long.

I was finally able to fully surrender my life to Him and give Him my whole heart. Now, for the very first time in my life I actually felt free!

See what the enemy does is he comes into our lives and lies to us. He makes us believe that we are alone in life and that it is all up to us. He puts this huge burden on us and says that if we just work hard enough, achieve enough, or just earn enough money then we will be satisfied.

And if we listen to that lie we trudge and grind through life trying to do it all ourselves when the truth is, Jesus offers us complete freedom! He has gone before us and already done all the work. It is when we surrender our lives to Him that we are able to truly live.

Our eyes are shifted off of ourselves and our burdens and we are then able to reach out to others and help them become free as well. We shift from a prideful and arrogant way of life, to one of humility and grace.

So praise Jesus that no matter how far we run or how much we think we do not need Him, He continues to pursue us and waits for us the whole time with open loving arms. He then picks us up, frees us from our sinful burdens and allows us to live the life He intended for us all along.

Matthew 10:39 “Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.”

“E

WHERE'S MY ADAM???

B Y CLARE TUCKER ANCHORSANDCROWNS. COM

veryone’s getting engaged, married and having babies and I’m over here like what’s the next series coming on Netflix?” For you non-southern readers, I am not sure if you can relate to this; but growing up with deepseeded southern roots, it is how some of us females in our 20s and 30s could describe our singledom (whether being single was by our choice or not).

From the time I could walk, I would clumsily stumble around in my grandmother’s heels with awkwardly placed makeup on my face and a princess crown on my head because my family told I me was one.

All of the Disney movies that I ardently watched as an impressionable young girl told me that princesses were only “complete and happy” after meeting their one true love (Prince Charming, if you will), getting married, moving into a castle of their own, having children, and then of course living “Happy Ever After.”

Here's the problem: That is not how God's plan always works. Not until I started seeking God with all my heart, mind, spirit did He clear up this misconception for me. We have to get everything straight with Him and with ourselves before any of this "happily ever after" can take place!

God has taught me, shown me and told me (when my stubborn heart finally gave it all to Him and started LISTENING) that you cannot give or receive true love until you first

you first love Him and then find out His purpose for you, thus putting you on the path to becoming the woman He intended you to be.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding; think about Him in all your ways, and He will guide you on the right paths” (Proverbs 3:56). Finding your happiness in Christ alone will transform your world.

A perfect relationship is that of two Jesus servants being in love with one another.

Please know that becoming happy with yourself first is one hundred percent attainable and it will make God ecstatic.

No, you don't have to do it this way and He will still love you but you are cheating yourself out of so many mind-blowing blessings. Bring your happiness in Christ with you wherever you go, it is your cross... your symbol of love for Him. We must stop putting this immense pressure on each other as humans to create happiness for one another. This only leads to disaster and disappointment, further crushing our selfesteem and integrity. The world will lie to you because unfortunately the devil is in charge down here.

Unless we call God down to manage our lives, especially our "love life", we will continue to look for answers that aren’t there and sail past the harbor of true love and salvation remaining lost at sea... Continuing

"EVERYONE’S GETTING ENGAGED, MARRIED AND HAVING BABIES AND I’ M OVER HERE LIKE WHAT’ S THE NEXT SERIES COMING ON NETFLIX?" to beg the question, even cursing Eve in the meantime, "WHERE IS MY ADAM?!"

This life on earth is hard enough with constant doubt and negativity attacking us. It is easy to believe the lies that the world and the devil will tell you but God’s plan for you will prevail and it is going to blow your mind!

You don't necessarily need to know this plan simply because He needs you to lean on Him for understanding and He is jealous for you. He loves us and just wants us close to Him! All you need to know is that the plan is spectacular and He promises that throughout scripture.

The devil will tell you it won't happen for you, but his job is to lie.

God never promises without coming through for us. "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart'" (Jeremiah 29:11-13).

Always know that your Savior has you. Focus on loving Him and keeping His decrees and He will pour out the blessings. God will always reward your obedience.

My season of loneliness has not been lonely at all! He has provided me with all of this knowledge, His teachings, His Grace and Glory while I can take it up - with no distractions!

How lucky Am I? I have blossomed and will continue to grow in Christ forever and ever. He has been watering me, pruning me, grooming me, while all distractions are gone. I know the next step is going to be something so amazing!

You heard my cry, Father.I ask you what to do and you answer me every time. “It is good for me that I was afflicted, that I might learn Your statutes.The law of Your mouth is better to me than thousands of gold and silver pieces” (Psalm 119:71-72).

I no longer doubt my God and His timing, for it is perfect. Trust in that. I Owe All To You Jesus.

Couture 31 Ph

hoto�shoot

PHOTOGRAPHER'S Killian Rose, Psalm 46:5 Abbey Kleczinski, Psalm 61:2 Anna Cox, 2 Corinthians 4:7-12

FRIENDS Zoe Mullins, Matthew 5:16 Hope Caldwell, Philippians 4:6 Hayley Marchionda, Romans 8:14 Krista McNabb, Habakkuk 3:17-18 Mallory Johnson, Psalm 37:4 Aubrey Bankemper, Proverbs 3:6 Colyn True, 2 Corinthians 12:10 Jenna Bream, Romans 12:12 Mallory Meisner, Lamentations 3:22-23 Danielle Rayman, Colossians 3:17 Ellen Combs, Jeremiah 29:11 Elizabeth Combs, 1 Corinthians 16:14 Paige Blair, John 10:10 Kayla Weber, Jeremiah 29:11

Photographed in Kentucky

COUTURE 31

BY KELSEY ACH WWW.COUTURE31.ORG

WORTH IT ALL B Y KELSEY ACH - COUTURE 31

“NOW TO HIM WHO IS ABLE TO DO IMMEASURABLY MORE THAN ALL WE ASK OR IMAGINE, ACCORDING TO HIS POWER THAT IS AT WORK WITHIN US , TO HIM BE THE GLORY IN THE CHURCH AND IN C HRIST JESUS THROUGHOUT ALL GENERATIONS, FOREVER AND EVER! AMEN” EPHESIANS 3:20-21

You, on the other side of the screen and

page, it’s good to see you again. It’s good to meet again in this space that speaks life and grace and so much truth it could burst us. It’s good for us to be here together. This is all very good.

Because we are all here together. A moment of vulnerability? So many times in my life I’ve felt I was the only one. And so this space comforts me because odds are, you’ve felt the same. And sometimes all we can see in front of us is the isolation within us and that’s not God’s plan.

I realized not too long ago that God created us for each other, each of us incomplete until we meet another child in God’s beautiful family. And yes, you are beautiful. Please understand that today. Your life, the way He so intricately knit you together and designed your soul, it’s all so beautiful.

Two weeks ago, my home was opened to fourteen girls that I didn’t know. And my entire being was screaming excitement for what was about to happen. God was at work and His grace was about to explode. And the residue of this certain explosion would bring joy-tears to our eyes. Being in the middle of what Heaven orchestrates will forever be the greatest feeling in all the world.

So there we all were, women that didn’t know each other and only brought together by the hand of our awesome God. And if you don’t know this God I write of and if you wonder ifWho He is could ever impact you, I ask you to keep reading. Because when you meet Him, Jesus, your life will never be the

same. And this is what He does.

He binds hearts. Like He’s binding ours right now.

So fourteen women descended upon my house and three photographers came and wardrobes were picked all in the name of a photo shoot. We had no idea that God was up to so much more. He always is, this God of ours. He will always do immeasurably more.

And so we watched as the cameras pointed, but Heaven opened. And hearts that knew nothing of the others were immediately bonded. Women met friends and for two hours their souls shouted that their very lives were the most beautiful things in all of creation. It was as if Jesus took each of them aside, put His holed hands on their cheeks and whispered, You, my precious daughter, are more beautiful than anything I’ve ever seen.

You, daughter, I love you.

Cameras snapped and photographers knelt this way and that to get the perfect shot, capture the essence of the day, community, but a million photographs could not capture what was so obvious. As women smiled and laughed and met each other for the first time, I felt like all of eternity was sitting on the edge of their seats with tears in their eyes.

Daughters had found each other! And in one day, not one of us could ever say we were alone again. You, on the other side of the page and screen, you can never say you’re alone again. Because here I am and I’m with you.

I recognized two weeks ago that I will never walk through a valley again without someone beside me. My spirit exhaled a sigh of relief as

"TWO WEEKS AGO, FOURTEEN GIRLS GOT MUD ON THEIR FEET, TREE BARK ON THEIR PANTS, AND FLOWER CROWNS IN THEIR HAIR. MORE IMPORTANTLY, FOURTEEN GIRLS MET JESUS FACE TO FACE , HELD THE HANDS OF OTHER IMPERFECT WOMEN, AND REALIZED WITH CERTAINTY THAT THEY WOULD NEVER AGAIN BE THE ONLY ONE ." hopeful Me Too resounded. Other hearts have been broken, other pillows have been soaked with tears, other mirrors have been yelled at. Others have felt my heart beats and been there, I just wasn’t able to see them at the time.

As we walked through woods and the girls’ laughter bounced off of the mossy tree trunks around us, my heart took it all in. And if I wrote down every thought I had that day I don’t think I’d ever stop writing, because all my soul could say was Thank You, Jesus. And every word of every page I would write would be those three small, but powerful, words, Thank You, Jesus.

And the day and its entirety was nothing short of a miracle. Any words I use to describe how effortlessly everything came together will seem insignificant and miniscule. But when God goes into action, will any words do? Only full hearts remain. And so I stand on the same ground today that we stood on two weeks ago, but today instead of sunshine and 55 degrees, there is two feet of snow. And we were crazy to do a photo shoot in the middle of February and ask women to come together and become fast friends, but it wasn’t a typical day. Because God is not a typical God. He brought warm winds and sunshine in the dead middle of February. He allowed women to love immediately, not judge rashly. He created a space for His Presence to overflow and reach deep and I truly believe lives were changed.

We laughed together, that day. Women with lives so different, but so similar. We prayed together, that day. Girls with hearts that echoed the praise of Jesus even though we’ve been in dark places. A few of us even cried together, that day. Daughters completely amazed at what God had done and eager for the more that He had in store.

And so this day, some day in March 2015, is the day you will no longer be alone. Because I need you.

We need you. We so desperately need you. We need your gifts and talents and parts of your heart that you want to hide. We need your smile and your laugh and your sense of humor. We need your intelligence, the way your brain works, the way your mind processes life as we know it. And even if you push us away, we will step closer because there is no one that should walk alone.

Friend, let His holed hands show you that You were worth it all. You were thought of, dreamed up, and placed exactly where you are right now for a reason. As my friend would say, Courage, Dear Heart.

Two weeks ago, fourteen girls got mud on their feet, tree bark on their pants, and flower crowns in their hair. More importantly, fourteen girls met Jesus face to face, held the hands of other imperfect women, and realized with certainty that they would never again be the only one. And so as the day came to a close, we pulled six girls back outside. We explained that God had given us an idea and it was a crazy one, but we were going with it. We had six signs, six phrases of affirmation that are on the lips of the King for all of His girls.

We asked these six girls, their names that had been placed on our hearts for each specific phrase, to hold the sign for a few more pictures. The catch? They would not know the sign they held until the end of the photo sequence. So there before us stood I am Free, I am Healed, I am Loved, I am Chosen, I am Worthy, and I am His. There before us stood women that just needed a reminder that He calls them His own.

He calls you His own.

And the reactions brought this soul to its end, as tears were the only response to His great love. So as cars pulled away and hugs were given and friendships were made, we took one long breath. God had outdone Himself. And my friend whispered the words that were held captive within me, Kels, if we don’t get one picture from today, it was all worth it.

And she was right. She was so right. It was all worth it, because fourteen imperfect, flawed, gracefilled women were reminded they are worth it all. They, you, us, we are worth it all. Thank You, Jesus.

Allison Gieringer

A g e : 1 7 - C i t y : R e a d i n g, P A

WHY JESUS? There is no force, nor person nor place or thing in this world that gives me the unfailing peace of mind and overflowing feeling of love that I receive from my Lord and Savior. With His faithfulness, I delight in each beautiful day and the “little things” that are placed before me. His joy is my strength. I like to think of Jesus as being “incandescently contagious”. He is incandescent; passionate, sparked by brilliance and luminous because of his striking brilliance and glowing zeal. His spirit is contagious; something which spreads from one person to another with ease. The light that He gives off- the light I choose to follow with all that I am- is strikingly brilliant, luminous passion that spreads from one person to another producing the warmth in this world. His love is relentless and electric, and I want His light to glow from every fiber of my being. I seek His face because I wish to make His face known. I pursue the God-sized dreams He has laid on my heart because I know His plan is unfailing.

WHY MUSIC? Music is one of the most beautiful gifts that God has blessed this world with. When I sing, I feel the love of God and His presence well up inside of me; it fills me with love and inspiration like I have never experienced before, and I overflow with joy knowing that He has blessed me with such an incredible spiritual gift. Music can change the world because it can change people. Music can change the world because it makes us “feel”. Music can change the world because it opens our hearts and our minds to all the beauty of this life, and I have a burning desire to make an impact in the lives of people with my music. It absolutely captivates me when I think about the fact that each and every one of us has a miracle inside of us- the voice. Think about how it feels to have a miracle inside of you- it’s beautiful! We are living museums of music, and we bring notation to life through our instruments. I pursue music because I have to- it is living and breathing within me. It is a necessity like food, or water, and I want to use my passion to glorify Him- the one who breathed the life into my lungs that allows me to sing His praises.

BIG PICTURE: (WHAT DO YOU ASPIRE TO ACHIEVE WITHIN THE PERFORMING ARTS?) I believe that my calling is not only to be a “performer” per se, but to inspire others to be inspired through the passion that I pursue; music- my spiritual gift. This is my ultimate goal. I want to be a light in the industry and pursue my talents and dreams for the glory of God. I am beyond thankful for the gifts that I have been blessed with, and I only hope to make His name known wherever I go, whomever I am with, and however I use my talents on this journey. If I have to list a few specific goals that I would hope to accomplish, I would say that I would love to tour with an opera company in Europe (I am a huge Opera junky and plan to pursuer a career in classical performance), eventually teach music at the collegiate level and continue to be involved with music ministry and songwriting/composition.

BEST PART ABOUT BEING AN E AST C OAST GIRL: One of the best parts about being an East Coast girl is that I am in the midst of some of the greatest creative outlets in the world. I frequently go to Philadelphia and New York City to see shows and other performances, attend master classes and auditions, and the job circuit in the music/performing arts industry is bustling with exciting opportunities for we East Coast folk.

WHAT WILL YOU SAY TO JESUS THE DAY YOU STAND BEFORE HIM? If I am being completely honest, I am not exactly sure what it is that I would say. I am so often left completely speechless by His unfailing grace and love, and dwelling in His presence leaves me with a sense of peace and calm like nothing and no one else in this world. I feel as though standing before Him would leave me unable to speak. But if I am able to speak words I hope to sing His praises louder than ever before and simply thank Him for the incredible blessings he has placed in my life.

LAURA WATSON PHOTOGRAPHER - ATLANTA, GA www.PEACH-PHOTO.com

I WANT TO KNOW THAT I DIDN'T LEAVE ANYTHING UNSPOKEN OR ANY TALENT UNUSED. WHEN I SEE GOD, I HOPE HE WILL SAY, "WELL DONE, GOOD AND FAITHFUL SERVANT. "

IF YOU COULD PHOTOGRAPH JESUS, WHERE, HOW AND WHY WOULD YOU PHOTOGRAPH HIM THIS WAY? Oh, my heart would explode! The idea of capturing Jesus' portrait sounds ludicrous to me because I know the camera couldn't ever do Him justice. No form of light or angle of the camera could encapsulate who He is, and I know I wouldn't be worthy for that task. So, if I had the honor of documenting Jesus, it would be from the viewpoint of the people He ministers to. I would show Him through the faces of those He's saved. Through those who were lost in darkness and death but now have light in their world because Jesus came down, reached out and touched them. To be able to witness the man/God/love of my life doing the very thing that has made me whole would be the greatest honor.

THERE ARE MANY PEOPLE WHO CLICK A CAMERA. WHAT MAKES YOU DIFFERENT FROM ALL THE OTHERS? I don’t believe that I’m much different from the next photographer based on how I shoot. I still only shoot with a Canon 7D. I click the same buttons and use the same settings as every other photographer.

But I want to glorify Jesus Christ through my photography. My dream is to create moving photographs that show Christ’s love for his people, through His people, in every part of the world and during every transition in life whether weddings or mission work.

TO PEOPLE READING THIS WHO LIVE IN DIFFERENT PARTS OF THE STATES, WHAT' S IT LIKE GROWING UP IN THE SOUTH? Grits, coke, sweet tea, church, hot and sweaty summers, country music (which I hate), rap music (which I love), small towns, "ya'll", boiled peanuts, hospitality, fried chicken, mosquitos, tall trees, the “Bible Belt,” friendly neighbors and pickup trucks. There's a charm and compassion in the South that I love.

I've grown up surrounded by amazing people with deep roots in Christ and I can’t imagine growing up anywhere else. There’s also this incredible range in landscape that, for a photographer, provides endless photo opportunities: lakes, fields, flat roads, tall grass, thick forests, antebellum homes, mountains, and urban graffiti. Georgia has it all. Like everyone’s home, the South has shaped who I am and I love it here…despite the horrendous heat and humidity.

YOUR WEBSITE BIO SAYS PHOTOGRAPHY IS YOUR MINISTRY FOR JESUS. HOW SO? My three passions in life are, in order: God, Photography, and Travel. I knew the minute I decided to pursue photography that I would need to use it to glorify God. There was no question about it. There are so many scriptures that call Christians to use our talents for the spreading of the Gospel and to glorify Jesus Christ that my logical brain forced me to realize that using photography as my vessel to worship God was something I needed to do out of love for him and obedience to him.

ONE DAY WHEN YOU STAND BEFORE GOD AND HE OPENS HIS VOICE TO SPEAK TO YOU. WHAT DO YOU HOPE HE ' LL SAY? "When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me.'" -Erma Bombeck I want to know that I didn't leave anything unspoken or any talent unused. When I see God, I hope he will say, "Well done, good and faithful servant."

PICTURED: LAURA WATSON

DAVID MCCLONE PHOTOGRAPHER - ATLANTA, GA WWW. PEACH- PHOTO. COM

"God has blessed me with not having the need to ask why, or wavering in my faith whenever a wrench gets thrown in my plans."

PHOTOGRAPHY, MUSIC AND FILM ARE YOUR CREATIVE PASSIONS. WHY? God gave me the blessing and the curse of seeing and hearing imperfection, and really wanting to fix things. It's a blessing, because it has led to many careers, hobbies and skills that I never thought I'd have, and a curse because nothing is ever good enough. I've ruined countless movies and photos for myself by thinking, "That looks good, but this would have looked better." and music because, "The mix was all wrong. That hi-hat was a bit loud, and the bass too soft" so on and so fourth. Because photography, music and film are all quite literally at my fingertips, it has lead me on a path that I think all artists are on, and that is to create something that is perfect. Unfortunately perfection is unobtainable, but I guess you can still try, right?

YOU' RE A MIDWEST GUY LIVING IN THE SOUTH. WHAT ARE THE GREATEST DIFFERENCES BETWEEN EACH REGION? First thing that comes to mind: the weather. Just like a southerner up north would fear and stress over an approaching winter, I fear southern summers. It's not like Michigan has cool summers; it definitely gets hot. But, what doesn't happen is the overwhelming humidity. Here in Georgia when you step outside to start your day, the summer is like, "Oh, you just showered? Let me make sure you're soaked again by 10am."

IF GOD ASKED YOU TO SHOW HIM 1

PHOTO YOU ARE MOST PROUD OF THAT YOU PHOTOGRAPHED, WHAT PHOTO WOULD YOU SHOW HIM AND WHY THAT PARTICULAR PHOTO?

It would be a photo I took this past summer on the beaches of St. Augustin, FL. A massive storm had just passed through and was slowly making its way back out to sea. I ran down on the beach to get some final lightning photos when I noticed how clear the sky was above the beach in contrast to what it was above the ocean. It was a beautiful sight and I managed to capture that contrast in one photo. I would show God this photo because I think it's my best representation of him and he made it all. I just clicked the button.

HOW DOES YOUR FAITH INTERTWINE WITH WHO YOU ARE? When it comes to God's plans, I have always been almost unconsciously faithful. If you knew me, you'd know it's a bit odd, because in all other aspects of my life I've always needed some sort of control. Thankfully, God has blessed me with not having the need to ask why, or wavering in my faith whenever a wrench gets thrown in my plans. Because of this God given faith, I've experienced things 10 times better than I had ever planned, and I wouldn't be who am today without it.

Andrea Gill

I

ATLANTA, GA

"THE HOLY S PIRIT INSTILLED IN ME COMMUNICATION, WHAT IT MEANS TO BE DISCIPLINED IN THE F AITH"

came to know what FREEDOM is in Jesus Christ, and how HE took my place on the Cross when I was 9 years old. I distinctly remember hearing about a God who was BIG, who cared, who moved mountains and brought people back to life.

I thought “I want to know that God.” After this fulfillment of His promise in me the Lord granted places to learn at church and my Christian school.

Here is where I grew in the understanding and defense of my faith.

I gained people who would care for me, challenge me, encourage and uplift me. He established in me a heart for missions early. I had the opportunity to share the Gospel on two separate trips to the Dominican Republic.

Throughout this time, I felt as if He was blessing me with eyes to see what life with Him could be.

Though one interruption defined all following it. The summer after junior year of high school, in 2008, I was in my third year as a lifeguard. In two separate, accidental incidents, two different boys drowned at the establishment where I worked.

The first, in May, was tragic and emotional, and created great deadness inside me. It was the worst day of my life. I could not shed enough tears to understand why it happened and why I was helpless to prevent it.

Instead of running to the Father, I convinced my parents and my friends that I was ok. I do not remember speaking to the Lord that summer.

In August of the same year, the summer season was coming to an end and I had one day of lifeguarding left before going back to school for my senior year. That day a boy drowned and I was the one to find him and fight to bring him

back to life.

That hope was not granted. I called out to God for the first time in months because I couldn’t carry the weight on my own any more. He assured me that He was mighty and that He is the Healer of all things, not me.

However, deep scars and fears were created during that summer. I never officially dealt with those things until 4 years later when I was 21.

Jesus saved me, but healing took time.

I truly believe the bulk of my spiritual growth happened during my 4 years at a Christian University. The Holy Spirit instilled in me communication, what it means to be disciplined in the Faith, and to set aside judgment and allow Love to rule.

He gave me a heart for the nations and the chance to bring the Gospel to Nepal and Italy. HE founded mentors and friendships. He taught me to be BOLD. He gave me leadership and mentoring opportunities, and the gift of being mentored by older sisters in the Faith. The Lord revealed to me the man I would marry, and the beautiful covenant He had in store.

RT and I have been married for a year and a half, and the Holy Spirit is ever-refining, evermoving, ever-constant in that. I know RT loves Jesus more than me. HE is teaching us to lead for His glory.

This is the most thought-provoking time in my life. Our growth is not just happening, but HE pushes us to seek and find, to establish His Word in others. Big things are coming!

“HE Himself bore our sins in His body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By His wounds you have been healed.” – 1 Peter 2:24

MIAJONES Atlanta, GA

I

"Speak tenderly to me, oh Savior, and never stop."

was raised in a Christian household. Georgia girl, sweet tea, and yes—we loved Jesus. Even if we didn’t frequent church every single Sunday as a family, the Lord was in our midst and He infiltrated thoughts at the kitchen table and while taking long trips to see Maw Maw and Paw Paw in North Carolina; or to the beach in the summer with the red van packed and snack wrappers decorating the car floor.

The conversations with God were always the most important commitment; the conversations are what kept, and keep me intimately connected.

Church still doesn’t happen every single Sunday, but those conversations were what saved me.

They rescued me on the front row of a small chapel that sat nestled atop the hills of Montana.

My sophomore year of undergrad my track coach invited a small group of my teammates and I on a leadership/spiritual team-building trip to Montana. Now, I know what you’re thinking, it was random and a few eyebrows were raised when a group of young, black athletes were walking to the airline gate that read “Frontier.”

We didn’t know exactly what we were in for, but we knew there would be prayer and talking and lots of bonding with the great outdoors. Upon arrival, Montana was what I expected—sprawling land, a crispness in the air that you could almost taste, and hills that rolled right along next to us as the wheels on our Suburban traveled on the highway to salvation.

I felt God all over again in the Montana air and I left the lightness wash over me in baptismal form.

Prior to this trip I was hurting. A bad breakup had me lost and searching for answers in conversations devoid of grace. I would read The

Word and let my eyes scan scripture but none of it took root. I had grown tired, I had also built up divides that I presumed were stronger than any church walls—even the ones holding up the small, modest chapel cushioned on the hills of Montana.

But on the evening before we departed, even my fortitude didn’t compare to that of God’s. I was weakened. Secular man would attribute it to thinner air, higher altitude.

A long week of physical activity and emotional strain. I know it as being rescued, lifted up. Every cell became anew and my hands reached up so high I could have touched the clouds that hovered low; almost sitting atop the chapel roof as if to partake in the feeling.

I can say it was Montana that saved me and renewed my relationship with Christ, but that involves giving a place too much credit for a relationship that was being cultivated even before I was made aware. I simply was reached in the sacredness of God’s majesty and captivated by the artist He truly is.

I think back to the colors and creatures and howls of the night—God is of and in. Each curve of the mountainside I am reminded of grace. Each gust of wind or glimmer of light.

God says to commune with Him over meals and car rides. In words on paper and walks to get lunch.

He saves me every day and I am not worthy.

Whether in a little chapel, interlocking gentle fingers with the man I love, or sitting at my office desk. He is constantly talking and I am listening. Speak tenderly to me, oh Savior, and never stop.

M od el s : m i a j on e s , a n d re a g i l l , a b b y fe l tn e r S t y l i s t : l a u r a t a y l or H ai r: macken si e march man Makeup: amanda st. john L o c a t i o n : v i o l e t b a n k in g r i f f i n , g a Ph otograph ers: l au ra watson & d avi d mccl on e

ANGELIC MAGAZINE ISAIAH 57:2 "FOR THOSE WHO FOLLOW GODLY PATHS WILL REST IN PEACE WHEN THEY DIE."

WEST COAST. EAST COAST. www.ANGELICMAG.com