ONE YEAR A NNIVERSARY ISSUE
ROMANS 8:28 "A ND WE KNOW THAT IN ALL THINGS GOD WORKS FOR THE GOOD OF THOSE WHO LOVE HIM, WHO HAVE BEEN CALLED ACCORDING TO HIS PURPOSE. "
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"one year later" It's been one year since Angelic Magazine has become real. A year ago I didn't know ifAngelic would still be standing today, but today, it's going strong. I'm personally inspired to passionately run our race with a vengeance in year two. To fearlessly mesh Jesus, Music and Fashion together for the purpose of bringing glory to God. This issue is special to me because it's a personal accomplishment God has facilitated in my road with Him. A dream has come true, the vision of blending creativity for Jesus has engrained itself into my walk with Him and there's no turning back now. Angelic is no longer a concept in my mind but a ministry for Jesus that is reaching San Diego, Phoenix, Las Vegas and as of this issue, Los Angeles. I give God all of the glory because without Him opening doors and molding me into the person He needs me to be, I wouldn't be writing this letter to you today. Year two is here and I'm ready to run by faith. I invite you to be a part ofAngelic Magazine and run with us on this journey. No weapon formed against Angelic Magazine will prosper. God's favor and blessings are upon us. He is a lamp to our steps and a compass for our hearts. I pray that in our second year as a magazine we help people fulfill their dreams. I pray that we will be authentic and bold, not shying away from fearlessly proclaiming the message of Jesus, as we should. Year two has begun. I await to experience all that God has in store.
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S EPTEMBER MODEL CASTING FEATURE B LOGGER S POTLIGHT: XPOSED B EAUTY MUSIC S POTLIGHT: HALEY B ETLAM MUSIC S POTLIGHT: CHRIS HERRINGTON INK FIENDS CLOTHING FEATURE CHARITY MAURER PHOTO-SHOOT TARA S HEARER ARTIST S POTLIGHT RANDI ESHELMAN TESTIMONY MARIANA WALTERS S TYLIST S POTLIGHT MUSIC S POTLIGHT: YUMI TYLER S ALDANA MINISTRY S POTLIGHT
42 ROBER S ARNO PHOTO-S HOOT 49 S URRENDER JEWELRY FEATURE 50 VERSE 14 EDITORIALS 54 ARINA B ORODINA PHOTO-S HOOT 56 MOLLY GREENBERG INTERVIEW 58 JAKI DOSSLAND TESTIMONY 64 MUSIC S POTLIGHT: S ARAH LORDS 67 B RITTAINNIE S IMMONS TESTIMONY 68 JENNY TARAU PHOTO-SHOOT 70 AMY S IRGHI MODEL FEATURE 74 JENNY TARAU PHOTOGRAPHER S POTLIGHT
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n Christmas Eve when I was four years old I asked Jesus into my heart. Soon after starting the best relationship of my life, my parents got divorced. My dad moved away to live with his family in Arkansas because he was an alcoholic and struggled with that disease until I was twelve. I lived with my mom and was an only child. I had countless dreams and vivid creativity growing up and had never ending conversations with God. In Junior High I started experiencing debilitating pains and my freshman year of high school I was hospitalized and diagnosed with Crohn’s Disease, Daily Chronic Headaches, Fibromyalgia, Chronic migraines and fatigue. A very long grocery list of other diagnoses and pains followed. These pains have come in and out of my life throughout the past ten years. I began missing school because I was hospitalized so much and in severe pain. I became isolated from the world and lost all my high school friends and became broken hearted from betrayal, jealously and backstabbing. The giggly, adventurous and goofy girl my parents knew started to go away and became replaced by a numb and fragile teenager who was not only in physical suffering but emotional as well. I struggled profoundly during that dark time. I started to believe that my health issues where whom I was meant to be- a painful mess that people eventually gave up on. Everything I knew and loved was stripped away until it was only Jesus and me. It has been a long, long process filled with innumerable tears. Throughout the years when I would begin to believe my life was just becoming “normal” and regardless of how hard I tried, God kept drastically
setting me apart. The world told me normal is good and that to be cunning and charming was something to be praised and that injustice is no big deal. The Lord thankfully has always had a drastically different calling for me. I do not fit into any worldly standards, and that was something I used to feel embarrassed about, praise Jesus that He calls me beloved, a gentle and understanding friend, a warrior who never gives up and fights for the truth! I began believing in who God calls me to be and have become stronger, though at times the physical pain is not any different. Regardless Jesus has given me the deepest wells of joy and trust to live in with Him. He took the broken, hurting girl and through faith and trust, deep true love and no pixie dust transformed her into who I am proud to be! Throughout a deeply humbling process where when I look back I wouldn’t change anything because in everything Jesus is my Lord and Savior. He is the love of my life. He is my very best friend who blesses me richly and gives me mercy when I mess things up. Jesus works through me in compassion, true sincerity, and a steadfast spirit. Throughout my life’s adventures He has brought healing to others. He has made laughter and smiles an evident aroma in my life throughout the most unfathomable of times. He never leaves His children who call Him by name. Living life to the fullest every day is challenging at times because I am in constant pain with much of it still being debilitating. Nevertheless Jesus always gives me something to smile about; this time it’s sharing my testimony with you. What makes you smile and full of joy?
Ichosen;remindacceptmyself of three things daily: We are your miracle; glorify God.
God made Himself known to me at a very young age. When I was a little girl my mom was diagnosed with brain cancer. She had a Stage 4 Glioblastoma on the right side of her brain with six months to live. I remember being 6 years old and walking in on my mom having a seizure on our office floor. I was going to lose my mom. Seventeen years later my miracle is still here. My mom survived! MY MOM SURVIVED! Why did I feel guilty? God let my mom come home to me, that’s great! He heard my cry and answered my prayers and I was still questioning him. What do I say when my friends ask why God took their mom and not mine? How was that fair? Like I said I felt guilty, ashamed even. I was trying to run away from the blessing He gave me. What had I done to deserve such a gift? Nothing. I didn’t have to do anything. That’s what was hard to believe. God loves me. Even writing this it is still hard to believe. God loves me? Yes. He loves you too. Say that to yourself out loud. Isn’t there such an overwhelming sense of relief and hope in that? I still don’t have the answers anyone wants to hear and the truth of the matter is I will never know why God decided to give my mom her miracle but I am humbled by it. There is a reason for every pain and suffering that we endure in this life.
I still don’t have the answers anyone wants to hear and the truth of the matter is I will never know why God decided to give my mom her miracle but I am humbled by it. There is a reason for every pain and suffering that we endure in this life. It is for the glory of God. The doctors, surgeons, and naysayers couldn’t deny that a miracle had occurred. Through this, I believe God’s love shone bright on many that may have never seen the light before or had hid from it in the past. I am able to share the story of true love, God’s love which I witnessed firsthand, every day. To those hurting and grieving do not lose hope. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 “So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” To those like me who felt unworthy of such love. 1 Peter 2:9 “But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light.” I remind myself of three things daily: We are chosen; accept your miracle; glorify God.
I
was raised in a Christian home with two amazing parents and one younger brother. As I was raised by a family of faith, I had accepted Christ at a very young age. Throughout the years as I attended charter schools, I kept my head in the books and stayed very reserved and shy. In Junior High, I had a pivotal moment that made my faith really become a relationship with Christ. For the longest time youth group was only an option if my friends were there. But then I felt a gentle, consistent prodding on my heart to go to church because I wanted to grow my relationship with Christ, not for a social experience. Even as I came to this life changing conclusion, this time was rather tough as I felt very alone and unnoticed outside of my comfort zone. I soon learned that my worth was defined by Christ and found through Him alone, not through others. The shift from a small charter school to a very large public high school opened my eyes to an entirely different medley of cultures and it was exhilarating. God brought a lot of individuals in my life that made me feel a part of something, a part of His church as a whole. After I graduated high school I soon became a student at Grand Canyon University. God began to show me what love is and how to live it out, not only through my family but through people I didn’t even know during what would happen next. Two weeks before my finals I began to feel pain in my lower abdomen. After the third day of pain, I finally decided to take advantage of the world’s internet source and I googled it. None of the symptoms were even remotely good, so enter in a visit to the doctor, radiologist, and then the emergency room. Turned out I had a 10+ pound
the emergency room. Turned out I had a 10+ pound cyst, which was going to be removed post finals. God gently orchestrated the timing of every little thing and He showed me that it is okay to accept help, especially after surgery as helpless as I was. During the next couple of years and throughout many events, God continued to usher in His everlasting love no matter the circumstance. He offered His quietness when I drifted away from His open arms and filled my time with everything but Him. When I felt the emptiness without Him, He opened my eyes to His great faithfulness. I have seen what faith the size of a mustard seed looks like through high school kids at a camp. I have learned to use that faith daily and trust that He will provide. He has taught me how to serve and lead in the positions I am given. From leading residents in college as a Resident Assistant to starting a group called The Art of Being a Lady. He gave me the opportunity to see His smile and joy embedded in the hearts in people of Mafikeng, South Africa. And He has shown me the importance of the Great Pursuit of His heart is and that life is all about getting beyond myself. I’m stepping outside of my comfort zone and will continue to do so. Through my failures and successes, He has used it all and I’m absorbing them as learning experiences. I’m making life one crazy adventure and truly living. It is not easy but I will pursue God and pursue others and make His love known.
Gwasrowing up, I knew I wasn’t like the other kids. I homeschooled, lived in a rougher part of town,
had mounds of frizzy, curly hair, and a “weird” name. My father is American, and my mother is from the Middle-East. Growing up in a post 9/11 era meant being half-Arab wasn’t something you would want to share with the world. The other kids at my church seemed to have the right life-mix: they were public schooled, lived in nice uppersuburban homes, and didn’t have to use phonics and repetition to introduce themselves. I badly wanted to belong with everyone. I was the kid who begged my mom for a PB&J sandwich for lunch instead of traditional pita bread and hummus so I could look like the rest. I wanted to not stick out and be isolated because I didn’t know where I belonged. My birth certificate said I was American, but I didn’t feel like I belonged in my own country or in Arab culture. I was told God made me “special”—but special seemed to mean “misfit” and “outcast.” I grew angry and resentful towards God for making me different. In my sophomore year of high school I went to a summer camp. My camp counselor posed a pivotal question—Are you going to make the commitment to make your faith your own and fully identify yourself in Christ or will you place your hope in other things? I realized that I wanted to make my parent’s faith my own, but I still struggled with my identity in Christ. When I started college, I figured if I wasn’t meant to be the pretty, popular girl I would be the smart successful one. School and career told me my
worth was found in how high my grades were, how many internships I could score, and the number of recommendation letters I had in my portfolio. I believed that lie through my first 3 years of college, but I still found my anger and resentment toward God resurfacing as things didn’t work out according to my 5 year plan. It wasn’t until the second half of my junior year when I went through a women’s Bible study on identity that I understood that I was believing this lie. I was putting all my hope in an empty investment, and my life was utterly spiritually bankrupt. I found new hope and forgiveness finding my identity in Christ—a hope I had never realized was there all those years. In Christ, my worth isn’t defined by my GPA, diversity card, or career path. My identity is found solely in Christ. Instead of placing all my trust in a future career, or validating my ethnic heritage, I have been discovering a new hope in my eternal heritage. My cultural background has proved to have a purpose. I have been able to share Jesus with people who have similar 3rd culture struggles. Jesus has been and is currently using what I felt useless and embarrassing for His glory. It has nothing to do with me being more or less worthy, but because He is worthy. I would be lying if I said I had everything figured out. I sometimes find myself on the beaten paths of my old mental ruts, and it is a daily struggle to bring my mindset back to the Truth; but my hope is this: Jesus uses us even in our weaknesses to glorify Him (2 Corinthians 12: 8 – 10).
BLOGGER SPOTLIGHT: JENNIFER JACKSON, HUNTINGTON BEACH, CA XPOSEDBEAUTY.BLOGSPOT.COM
Why is health important to you? I had a stroke about 5 years ago and it changed my life forever. I had to re-learn to walk, stand up, turn my head, and even lay down in bed. I promised myself right then that I would do everything I could to put only healthy things in my body and to fully appreciate everything I had. I have become a happier, healthier, and my skin glows. I truly believe that beauty comes from the inside out. What are some of your health secrets? I always get questions about my skin, and although its not perfect, It glows because of juicing and eating whole foods. If I have an event to go to, I always juice the day before. I try my best to not eat processed food, and dark greens are my best friend! :) The biggest secret is saying goodbye to sugar, and making dark chocolate your late night craving! Why do you feel health, fashion and beauty are essential to a woman's lifestyle? I believe all women want to feel beautiful, and I strongly believe that beauty comes easily when you are healthy. You feel gorgeous in your clothes, your skin is radiant, and people will ask you what your doing to look so gorgeous. Sharing healthy secrets with people makes me feel great, I love knowing that Im going to make someone feel better and look gorgeous. What are some of your fashion and beauty secrets? My biggest beauty secret is oils, I would swim in oil if I could. I use coconut oil on my body everyday and I sleep with Argon oil on my face at night. I like the idea that I don’t have any chemicals on my skin while its repairing. I also LOVE vitamin C, I use the powder on my face as a collagen booster, and I take liposomal vitamin C everyday. Fashion is so personal but I love a good pair of jeans, and gorgeous boots, with an off the shoulder top. Its sexy but still classy and everyone looks great in boots and jeans! How does your faith influence you? I grew up in a very religious place, and I believe that small town made me the person I am. Faith has taught me to love with all my heart and treat other people as I would like to be treated. Growing up I had so many beautiful people around me that were taught to be good to people, take care of each other, and do anything to help someone in need. Faith teaches you to be selfless and to love others. I feel so lucky that I learned that early in life.
MEET HALEY BETLAM,
PRAISE AND WORSHIP SINGER AT C3 CHURCH IN NORTH COUNTY SAN DIEGO. WHY DOES SHE CHOOSE JESUS AND MUSIC?
WHY DO YOU CHOOSE TO DO MUSIC? Music and Worship are in different categories for me. While worship is music, it has much greater purpose. I once did music, and while it may have been entertaining, I personally found it unfulfilling. Since following Gods call on my life in pursuing worship, I've not only found purpose in my life, but I've been able to give it to others. WHY DO YOU CHOOSE TO BELIEVE IN JESUS? In simplicity, I choose Jesus because He chose me. I can't ignore a love that would lay down His life, so in response I can't help but give that life, and all that comes along with it, to bring Him glory and honor and praise forever. AS A WOMAN IN MUSIC MINISTRY, WHAT ADVICE
WOULD YOU GIVE TO OTHER WOMEN WHO ASPIRE TO FOLLOW THE PATH YOU' RE ON?
I often see a competitive spirit amongst women in the church, and in general. I would encourage a woman who wants to use her gifts in music to be the biggest fan of the musical women around her. As they say, "Comparison is the thief of joy", and as soon as we shift our focus to where others are going
and what they're doing, we lose sight of the call and purpose God has on our own life. WHERE DO YOU WANT GOD TO TAKE YOU WITH MUSIC ? I believe in a God of the impossible, and I know He is more than able to take me places I've not dreamed myself of going. In fact He already has. So I'll continue to follow His lead and on the way hope to see the worship songs I lead and write touch hearts, and inspire them to love and follow Jesus with everything they have. PEOPLE IDENTIFY YOU AS A SINGER FOR CHURCH. TO THE PEOPLE WHO DON' T KNOW THE REAL YOU, WHAT DO YOU WANT THEM TO KNOW? I try my best to be relatable and vulnerable, so people don't have misperceptions of a perfect life or person just because of their position. I'm just like my friends in the congregation. I'm still learning, I like laughing (hardest at my own jokes), and I'm a newlywed trying to get the hang of cooking. I work hard, and have good days, but on the bad ones, I always try to have a thankful heart.
CHRIS HERRINGTON W P
ORSHIP ASTOR HARVEST NORTH PHOENIX
PICTURED, CHRIS & HIS WIFE CARRIE.
WORSHIP PASTOR AT HARVEST NORTH PHOENIX, CHRIS HERRINGTON SHARES HIS INSIGHS ON JESUS, MINISTRY, FAMILY AND THE FUTURE OF PRAISE MUSIC.
AS A WORSHIP PASTOR, WHAT'S THE BEST AND MOST DIFFICULT ASPECT ABOUT YOUR POSITION? The best aspect is the opportunity each week to remember and celebrate the gospel of Jesus as a church family. What he has done (redemption), what he has called us to (remember) as his church and what he sends us to do in our world (mission). The most difficult part would be doing what I mentioned previously with passion and creativity each week. WHY DO YOU FEEL MUSIC IS IMPORTANT IN REPRESENTING JESUS? Music can be powerful and provoke strength. Music also can be subtle and gentle. Through singing, clapping, raising our hands, prayer and other liturgical movements as a church we give thanks for what God has done and proclaim our dependence on Him. I believe music is one of the ways we represent what Jesus calls us to do and be in the world we live in. When we worship well our lives represent Him well to a world that desperately needs the gospel. WHERE DO YOU SEE THE FUTURE OF WORSHIP MUSIC GOING? Worship albums or projects are taking on the form of movements almost like symphonic movements. Crowder was one of the first to popularize this in modern worship. Worship bands are writing albums for the church (global) and for their church (local). Musically, the albums are similar to music written in the 80’s (loads of synths, simple yet powerful melodies that resonate well with the church,) but unique to this age because of what computers allow us to create in our time. The churches that are creating this worthy content are becoming hubs that offer the younger generation opportunities to create that are exceptional. AS A HUSBAND AND FATHER, HOW DO YOU BALANCE FAMILY LIFE WITH MINISTRY LIFE? When I’m home I strive to be present and fully engaged with my family. I want to get the most out of these minutes and hours when they are available. My wife and I have a consistent date night together. We have a family night together once a week. I also strive to work hard and to lead the ministry I serve in with excellence and passion. We maintain strong relationships with families inside and outside of the church. We want our children to know the love we have for the Lord, His church and what God is doing to build his church in this world. We do our best to do all of these things and though we fall short, by God’s grace we hope to honor Him in the way we live. WHAT ARE THREE RANDOM FACTS ABOUT YOU THAT MOST PEOPLE DON'T KNOW? I was a janitor three summers in high school and loved that job. I love Disneyland. My favorite singer/songwriter is Foy Vance.
CLOTHING BRAND 足 CORONA, CA WWW.INKFIENDS.COM CREATOR: ANTHONY GOODMAN WHY DO YOU CHOOSE JESUS? I choose God because he's been there for me throughout my life every step of the way. Religion is a relationship between you and GOD that needs to be cherished and welcomed into your life for it is special. I'm not perfect by any means and that's why I love God because He loves me and cares about me despite my flaws. He lifts me up and gives me the strength to get through every day. WHAT DOES YOUR BRAND STAND FOR? Ink Fiends is a brand that believes in permanently pursuing your passions. We adhere to the dreamers, doers, and fiends of the world. We make clothing for those who choose to push the boundaries of life farther through their dreams. IN 5 YEARS, WHAT DO YOU HOPE TO ACCOMPLISH WITH INK FIENDS? In 5 years we're looking to establish a strong following and respect for the brand. We're not in this industry to make a quick profit instead I want to build a loyal fan base of individuals who are inspired and pushed to follow their dreams. Over the next five years we want to open our first store in Los Angeles. THERE'S A PERCEPTION THAT TO BELIEVE IN JESUS MEANS YOU'RE BORING. WHY IS THIS PERCEPTION WRONG? In my darkest moments and times in my life I've always had God to lean on. If people want to judge me based on my faith in Christ then so be it, I know who I am and God knows who I am.
DREAMS AND PASSIONS ARE WHAT YOU'RE ABOUT. WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE SOMEONE WHO'S AFRAID TO PURSUE THEIR DREAMS? Well first things first, you can't be afraid to follow your dreams and goals in life. That's essentially admitting defeat and giving up on something that you care about. Nothing worth having in life comes easy you must be willing to sacrifice and grind in order to achieve your dreams. If you don't work for your dreams someone is going to hire you to help you build theirs. If that's the case why wouldn't you want to build your own dreams and work for yourself? INKFIENDS.COM FACEBOOK.COM/INKFIENDS TWITTER.COM/THEINKFIEND INSTAGRAM.COM/THEINKFIEND
WWW.CHARITYMAURERBLOG. COM
MODEL: TARA S HEARER HAIR & MAKEUP: MARIANA WALTERS FLORAL: RANDI ESHELMAN
TARA SHEARER MODEL/A CTRESS - PHOENIX, AZ
A RTIST SPOTLIGHT
COVER MODEL FOR THIS ISSUE, TARA SHEARER, SHARES WHY SHE CHOOSES JESUS AND WHY SHE'S CHOSEN A CAREER IN ACTING AND MODELING.
WHY DO YOU CHOOSE JESUS? He is the best medicine for my life and loves me more than anything in this world. Life can be hard and as a seeker of truth and purpose, I love that I can have a personal relationship with my Maker and the Creator of the universe. He brings love, peace, joy and understanding to my life on earth. I believe His promise is true and I don’t know how I would do life without Him. WHAT DO YOU ASPIRE TO ACCOMPLISH WITH MODELING AND ACTING IN THE NEXT 5 YEARS? Balance is the most important thing for me. I have a very creative side that I love to live out but I also have a professional career in sales and marketing. I really enjoy being part of a lot of different things. My goal in the next 5 years is to continue to grow as an actor and model in Arizona, branch out to a few other markets across the country, and be a light to as many people as possible along the way. IF YOU COULD ASK JESUS ONE QUESTION AND HE HAD TO ANSWER IT, WHAT QUESTION WOULD IT BE AND WHY THAT PARTICULAR QUESTION? Wowzers! This has to be the hardest question I could ever answer. It’s hard to choose only one because I already have a long list for Jesus when I meet Him face-to-face someday. The first thing that comes to my mind is: What is the most important thing you want me to know and do in my life while I'm here on earth? WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO PURSUE A CAREER IN THE CREATIVE ARTS? My high school had an incredible musical theatre program that was tied to a local theatre in the city I grew up in back East. I started doing a lot of musical theatre and loved the way I felt when I was performing and creating art. I ended up loving it so much that I decided to pursue a major in Theatre Arts in college. During college I got an agent and realized that I wanted to branch out into other mediums of acting like commercial/ tv/film work. I started getting booked for modeling jobs through my agent and grew a love for that as well. TO AN ASPIRING ACTRESS OR MODEL WHO IS READING YOUR FEATURE, IF YOU COULD GIVE THEM ANY ADVICE , WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE THEM? Do more of what you love - whatever it is that makes you feel alive and more in touch with God. That could be your job or just a hobby. For me it’s not just acting or modeling – it’s all things creative. The arts, make-up artistry, cooking, crafting, being relational. One of my favorite bands, NEEDTOBREATHE sings this song “GARDEN” and it really resonates with me and my hopes and goals with my career in the arts and entertainment industry. “Let the songs I sing bring joy to you, Let the words I say confess my love. Let the notes I choose be your favorite tune. Father let my heart be after you.” Whatever I do as an actor and model, I want to honor and thank God for my passions and blessings.
"He gives me hope in a hopeless world. And that hope carries me through this life. "
A little background into my life, I grew up in a family of 6 kids, 4 of us were adopted. My little sister and I were adopted from South Korea. My brothers were adopted in the US. We grew up in a Christian home and I accepted Christ at a very young age. Once I became an adult I married a man who was going into the ministry full-time as a youth pastor. So I became a pastor’s wife. This is nothing I ever expected that I would do. I wasn’t one of those girls that thought it would be the most romantic thing to marry a pastor. I actually told my family that I would NEVER marry a pastor. But God had other plans. I believe he has quite the sense of humor. My story has so many ups and downs, feeling close to God and so far away from Him. Crying because I have lost friends at such a young age or that people in the church have been so mean to my husband. I tell you this not to be angry about the things that happen in life but to understand that God has always been the only constant in my life. Being dependent on Him is what has carried me through the hard times in life. Everyone will let you down at some point in life. And you will let others down; you may not even realize it. But God is right there. He doesn’t leave. He doesn’t change. He loves me unconditionally, even when I mess up over and over again. Right now I am in the midst of building my little floral business. My husband is working at a secular job but is searching for another job in the ministry.
He is also in school full-time. Our two kids are in a new school. We are staying with family because of financial reasons. This is not how I thought life would go at the age of 35. I thought I would have everything together. I thought I would be secure financially and we would be this little perfect Christian family. WRONG. Life is messy and completely unpredictable. I could give up and reject God. Or I can surrender my plans and thoughts and give Him control. It always works out better when I give God control. Sometimes it doesn’t feel like that while I am in the midst of my craziness but His love for me is so deep – deeper than I will ever understand. He gives me hope in a hopeless world. And that hope carries me through this life.
WHY DO YOU CHOOSE JESUS?
I choose Jesus because I have known life without Him being close and with Him being close, and life with Him close is the best. WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO BECOME A MAKEUP ARTIST AND HAIR STYLIST?
I wanted to help women look and feel their best. The prettiest, most self-confident version of who they could be. Being a makeup artist and hair stylist allows me to help women get to that place. Jesus blessed me with a talent and showing women that side of themselves always brings a smile to my face. WHAT HAIR/MAKEUP PRODUCTS ARE YOUR FAVORITE THAT YOU'D DEFINITELY RECOMMEND TO OTHER STYLISTS?
I brand myself as a natural makeup artist/stylist. I use cruelty free, clean makeup products. All the products in my kit I have tried on my own face and hair. A line that I have recently started to love is called 100% pure makeup. It's rare to find a makeup line that is low in toxins, good for your skin and has pigment! In Arizona where I live, we have a great all natural makeup boutique called Citrine Natural Beauty Bar. I send all my clients to see the ladies there for their day to day makeup needs. AS A MOTHER, WHY DO YOU FEEL IT'S IMPORTANT TO TEACH YOUR KIDS ABOUT JESUS?
I grew up in a not so typical Christian home. Jesus was a known word and person but my parents struggled deeply with addiction. My brother and I through all the craziness: shelters, changing schools, moving cities, running from one parent with the other parent, we always had Jesus as a constant. I want my children to experience that pureness of God. There is a beauty to the innocent heart a child has and what they can learn before the world shows them something else. Having an early foundation in Christ, I believe will change their outlook on life.
ONE DAY WHEN YOUR KIDS ARE GROWN AND THEY'RE TO READ YOUR LEGACY, WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE YOUR LEGACY TO SAY?
I pray my children know me. It's funny as I sit here, nursing my third child who is 7 days old, thinking of what I want my legacy to be, the first thing that comes to mind is that I would show them how to be Godly parents. I mentioned before, that is something I didn't have growing up. So I yearn to teach my children how to be gospel centered and live life to the fullest. That would be my legacy, that I lived a gospel centered life to the fullest.
C HARITY MAURER PHOTOGRAPHER BLURB:
In thinking intently on what it would mean to design a photo-shoot around the Cross, I concluded on one message I’d wish to share: the desperate need for the cross. I was well-accustomed to the message that “Jesus died for me” early on in my journey, but sometimes I felt the confusion of why exactly I needed him to. I think it was when I was 15 and I got to see the pain in a friend who I had wronged that this fact, that Jesus died because and for sin, started to become real to me in a new way. Fast-forward to today, and I’m dealing with the loss and brokenness of a dear friendship due to gossip, lack of communication, and a whole lot of hurt. In my short 24 years of life, it is blazingly apparent that there is something very wrong with our world, and that, frankly, I’m a part of it. It’s my perspective that we’re living in a culture and a generation in which the lines of right and wrong have become increasingly blurred. I mention this because I think it is, in part, why I and possibly many others have struggled to see this need for restoration. The message I want to send out to our generation is that all have sinned and fall short, and that we have all followed our own way (Romans 3:23). Our way leads to death and destruction. But thank goodness this is not the end of the story!
No, God Himself has entered into the story and provided a perfect sacrifice; a perfect life lived, for the payment of the sin in me and you. Something truly glorious happens when we bring the brokenness of our sin to Jesus: what was dead can now have life! What was lost can be found! The unjust can be made right, the heartless can receive grace and the broken and abused can be made whole! As an artist, I tend to create work that is light and soft. When it came to this project, however, I knew I had a different message to communicate. I wanted something striking and dark to communicate the brokenness and despair of sin, but I also knew I had to stay true to myself as an artist. What my team and I came up with was incorporating something soft, like tulle, in a natural setting with that touch of femininity through delicate floral and natural beauty that are so key to my work. I drew my inspiration for the shoot from Jeremiah 30 in which God speaks to the His people concerning their sin and His plan to enter into it. It’s such a powerful passage because you see God using strong language in addressing the seriousness and helplessness of His people’s disobedience ("Your hurt is incurable, and your wound is grievous.” 30:12), and yet he breaks in with this hope: "I will restore you to health, and your wounds I will heal” (30:17).
NEWPORT BEACH, CA YOUTUBE.COM/ YUMIMUSICOFFICIAL
WHY MUSIC? Everyone has a passion for something, and for me, it's music. Maybe my passion has been weaker at times and stronger at times, but it's always been there. I remember when everyone had all of their crazy dreams as a kid like becoming an astronaut, veterinarian and a chef at the same time, and I still just wanted to be a singer. While most of their dreams changed, mine never did.
things, it means taking up your cross and following Him, and to be real with you, I’m still doing that. It's an everyday surrender, and it's worth it. He's working on me and healing me day by day, and He'll continue to do that for the rest of my life. Following Him is like stepping into a world of light after sitting in a dark prison cell for years, and I would never ever go back.
WHY JESUS? I wasn't raised in a Christian home, nor was I ever a Christian up until five years ago, so I got to see the difference between a life without Jesus, and a life with Him. I can't promise you that it's been easy. Really following Jesus means giving up
WHAT DO YOU HOPE TO ACCOMPLISH WITH MUSIC IN THE NEXT 5 YEARS? Regardless if my music gets big, I would love to create a Christian/Secular album. But not your ordinary worship songs. I like writing my songs about God with hidden meaning, so that both
secular and Christian people listen to it and like it. And that way, if I'm asked about the meaning, I can share Jesus with people in a new way, maybe in a way that will be more effective. I'm not sure if anyone has ever done that, but I love the idea of reaching for places that have a need but haven't been touched yet. I think there are a lot of needs in this generation and I feel that God is calling me to fill some of those needs with His truth. HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOUR STYLE OF SOUND TO SOMEONE WHO'S NEVER HEARD YOU? As for the songs I've written right now, I would say they are folk/pop. But once I learn my software, and really exercise my skills as an artist, I want to create more colorful music. I've always listened to so many different types of music, everything from Indie to R&B, that I could never put my dream album into a genre. I want all of my songs to have something different in each one, from heavy beats, to string instruments, and everything in between. So for now, I could describe my sound as folk/pop, but for my future sound? I have way bigger ideas. WHAT DO YOU WANT YOUR LEGACY TO SAY? I would want it to say that I was a person who gave God my all. That I was brave and fearless in delivering God's truth, no matter if I did it through music, my video series, or just everyday conversations. Most importantly, that I always kept it real with people, while offering a true representation of who I follow, a God who loves.
WWW.TYLERSALDANA.ORG
Why are you a youth pastor? I'm currently a youth pastor because I strongly believe that this generation has an incredible opportunity to influence their peers. With the rise of the internet and social media, everyone is given the opportunity to have a voice. Yes, there are many obvious flaws to that reality. However, one positive implication of social media is that today's Jesus-loving followers can use their social media presence to influence more people than ever before. In your opinion, what is the greatest stronghold the enemy has on the youth as well as the people of our generation today? Fear. More and more, our youth are being brewed with a fear of culture, science and living in a society where a Christian worldview is viewed as hateful, unreasonable and bigoted. This fear sidelines countless Christians, hindering them from having any impact on the world they live in. Instead of fearing humanity, we are called to fear the God Who created us and serve His eternal purposes on this earth. To someone who doesn't know Jesus, what would you want them to know? Without Jesus, this life is completely meaningless. Our entire lives consist of endless endeavors to conquer and achieve until death robs us of all our accolades. If all that our hands craft, hold and praise will one day be stripped from us, what is the point of all our toil and pain? Only the good news of Jesus and His coming eternal kingdom gives hope, value and significance to our otherwise insignificant, "gone-with-thewind" lives.
(TYLER & his wife E RIN S ALDANA)
What dreams and visions has God put on your heart?
It is my hope to one day be a part of a church planting movement in major city (perhaps LA). I love the church and major cities mainly because God describes His church kingdom as a city. Since it's projected that nearly more than %75 of the world's population will live in a major city by 2050, the church has a tremendous opportunity for influence and impact by planting churches in urban areas. Why should men respect women? 1 - Women are created in the image of God just as much as men are. If we view anyone as a mere object of our sexual desires rather than a human being with value and dignity, we are in essence treating God the same way. 2 - When we seek sexual satisfaction in areas such as pornography or any other sexual encounter outside of marriage, we are both robbing ourselves of joy and women of their dignity by making sex about us rather than about our spouse. God did not design sex to be simply a recreational, physical and selfish action but instead an intimate, meaningful, joyous and selfless union between a husband and his wife. 3 - Every man has or will have a close lady in his life whether it be his mom, sister, wife and/or daughter. I doubt, for example, that any decent father desires for his daughter to be treated as a sexual toy for some trashy dude's pleasure. God, our heavenly Father, feels the same way about every single one of His daughters.
MODEL: JACKIE REYES MAKEUP: JOCELYN MARGATE WARDROBE STYLIST: ELISA CORTEZ
PHOTOGRAPHER SPOTLIGHT - L AS VEGAS, NV WHY DO YOU CHOOSE PHOTOGRAPHY? I chose photography because it is one of the few professions that require a lot of hard work that I can actually enjoy! Initially, I thought it would give me flexibility with my time being that I am a single parent, but I have since learned this is not the case. It is a demanding field to study and requires a lot of diligence WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON HOW RELIGION INFLUENCES CREATIVITY? One aspect of religion shows us a struggle between good and evil. For me personally, life is full of struggles and good/bad decisions. People often fall, make mistakes and lose their way. It is important to have a foundation (such as religion) in which one can get up and believe they can succeed. My views have been shaped by religion knowing that there is goodness, kindness, and beauty. Oftentimes, I choose to try and show that through a picture. WHAT' S THE GREATEST MISCONCEPTION ABOUT LIVING IN L AS VEGAS? I recently moved here, but have visited many times prior. Currently, the greatest one is that everyone living here is a contributor to the “City of Sin”. This is far from the truth; most people living in Las Vegas are normal folks and families that actually avoid casinos and the Las Vegas Strip whenever possible. WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE YOURSELF WITH PHOTOGRAPHY IN THREE YEARS? It’s been 1 year and 4 months, since I started my journey to become a photographer. I want to be able to look back 3 years from now and see growth in my knowledge and artistry. I also want to be sure I am working just as hard as I do now in perfecting my craft, and not feeling comfortable with the status quo.
IF YOU COULD ASK GOD ONE QUESTION AND HE HAD TO ANSWER IT, WHAT QUESTION WOULD YOU ASK AND WHY WOULD YOU ASK IT? I’ve lost a lot of loving and kind people throughout my life that have been major influences in my life. I would ask how they are doing and to let them know that they were a special part of my life and are still in my thoughts. It’s amazing how often we take for granted the special people in our lives, and when they are gone, we wish that we could have told them this.
S URRENDER JEWELRY LARRY & GRACIE DARDEN LOS ANGELES, CA WWW. SURRENDERJEWELRY. COM
How did Surrender Jewelry begin? In 2009, my wife, Gracie, was shopping for a piece of jewelry for me to celebrate my first sober birthday. She went to all the usual department stores but couldn’t find what she was looking for – something rock & roll with a recovery message. She worked with a jeweler friend of hers in downtown LA to custom design a ring with the “Serenity Prayer” around the band. I loved it so much! Since there was nothing available in the market, I told her she should start a business to fill that need for high-quality, recovery themed jewelry. Many tough years later, she’s turned it into a growing small business.
As a husband/wife team, how has doing Surrender Jewelry influenced/impacted your marriage? Gracie walked into my life when it was in a quickly dissolving downward spiral. She believed in me when I had stopped believing in anything. She refused to let me drown. Soon after that, she got cancer. There was no better lesson for getting out of my own head and showing up for another human How is God represented through your business? When people email or call us to tell us that our jewelry being than helping her get through that scary time. It has brought them serenity, strength or helps them was after these two life-changing events that we celebrate their recovery in some way, I believe that’s started Surrender Jewelry. an affirmation that God is working to bring us together to experience the struggle and the joy of recovery. It’s How can people get your jewelry? these small groups of people joined together by a Surrender Jewelry is in the gift shop and Spa at the common spiritual experience that are living proof of Beverly Wilshire Hotel in Beverly Hills. It will also be available at My 12 Step Store in West Hollywood His power. Our rings and dog tags feature the “Serenity Prayer” very soon. You can also purchase online at which asks God to grant us serenity through SurrenderJewelry.com acceptance, courage and wisdom. It’s our humble mission to spread the message that God has the power to grant that serenity to all of us. What’s your vision for where you’d like to see Surrender Jewelry in the next 3 - 5 years? We would really love to see a huge breakthrough in the treatment of alcoholism and addiction. Much of the reason alcoholics and addicts isolate when in active addiction is due to the social stigma associated with the problem. I believe treatment would take a huge leap forward if families and loved ones withheld their judgment of the use of these substances and kept their alcoholic/addict close to them even in active addiction when possible (safety of the family being the overriding concern). Isolation makes the problem so much worse and can lead to suicide and overdose.
LACK OF OBEDIENCE IS AN ISSUE OF TRUST
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verse BY BRITTNEY WILSON
’ve been going through the book of Genesis lately and digging through some of the Old Testament books. As I was reading through Genesis 22, the story of God testing Abraham really spoke to me. God told Abraham to go to the land of Moriah, and offer his only son Isaac as a burnt offering on one of the mountains. Without hesitation, Abraham rose early in the morning, saddled his donkey, and took two of his young men with him and his beloved son Isaac. When Abraham arrived to the mountain God told him to sacrifice Isaac, he built the altar there and laid the wood in order and bound Isaac and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood. Then Abraham reached out his hand and took the knife to slaughter his son. Then the angel of the Lord called to him and said, “Abraham, Abraham!” “Here I am.” He said, “Do not lay your hand on the boy or do anything to him, for now I know that you fear God, seeing you have not withheld your son, your only son, from me.” And Abraham lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold, behind him was a ram, caught in a thicket by his horns. And Abraham went and took the ram and offered it up as a burnt offering instead of his son. So Abraham called the name of that place, “The Lord will provide”; as it is said to this day, “On the mount of the Lord it shall be provided.”(Gen 22:11-14 ESV)
Have you ever stopped and put yourself in Abraham’s shoes? Has God ever laid a situation in front of you that calls you to let go of something you love because He tells you to? Would you open your hands, give God your “loves” to what He says is good? I know the feeling. I can’t say I’ve obeyed each time God gives me an opportunity to let go of something I love and have in my grasp and obey the Holy Spirit, but whenever I have, the Lord has provided immensely. What does it mean to obey? It starts with love as Jesus said in John 14:15: “If you love me, you will obey what I command.” We obey because God loves us and we love Him in return. I think of Psalm 42:1, “As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God.” Have you ever desired God that much? Are you that thirsty for His love that you would let go of whatever God tells you to? Even if it is a good thing. Abraham could have disobeyed God and rejected his request, but He trusted that what He called Him to do was good. Let’s talk about it -Is your relationship with God based on love or fear? -How much to you allow yourself to trust God?
FORGIVENESS
e 14
"I KNOW IT’S NOT ALWAYS AN EASY THING. TO FORGIVE IS ULTIMATELY AN ACT OF OBEDIENCE. SO I RECENTLY FORGAVE THOSE PEOPLE THAT I STILL SOMEWHAT SUBTLY HELD GRUDGES AGAINST IN MY HEART. "
B Y KATIE MAY orgiveness is a hard thing to give; whether it’s forgiving others or forgiving ourselves. It is something usually easier said than done, but we all know it is necessary. Most of forgiveness is a decision that we make on our own, but some of it just feels out of our control. My failed attempts forgiving others in the past (usually ones who never apologized) left me feeling bitter inside. I thought I had moved on and forgiven them, yet I found myself years later still thinking about it and getting angry. I guess that’s when I learned I needed to truly forgive them and give all the rest of it to God and pray for Him to lift that off my heart. I have also never been quick to forgive myself. (Not really talking myself up in this devotion, am I?) It’s easier to sit and feel shameful over things rather than letting them go and moving forward. Mostly because I think I don’t deserve for it to just be over and done with. And the thing is, we don’t deserve forgiveness. But God still gave it to us at the cross; unconditional and eternal love and forgiveness! So why do I fight this? If we deny his forgiveness and can’t forgive ourselves, that’s denying His promise and relying on ourselves! I talked with my friend Brie the other day and she said the same things. “I think forgiving yourself can be harder than forgiving others because Satan wants to make
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broken and shameful, and the moment he accomplishes that, it doesn’t allow God to use your broken pieces and turn them into beauty. I forgive myself but I hold onto things because I want to be in control of it. What gives me the right to forgive myself? But we can’t move on and grow if we hold onto stuff.” – Brie Barclay Do not let Satan trick you into feeling bitter or ashamed. God has already completed the act of grace on the cross. I know it’s not always an easy thing. To forgive is ultimately an act of obedience. So I recently forgave those people that I still somewhat subtly held grudges against in my heart. I am still going to need to teach myself through life to forgive myself repeatedly, because I am not perfect. But I am HIS. Remember this truth, girls! “For I will be merciful toward their iniquities and I will remember their sins no more.” Heb. 8:12 “And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ also forgave you.” Eph. 4:32 “Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” Phil. 3:13-14
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FAILURES LEAD US TO BROKENNESS WHICH G OD TURNS TO BEAUTY
By Kaylie Brittain firmly believe God intentionally leads us into failure to show us that we need him. Not what most people signed up for when they became Christians. I sure didn’t but nevertheless my life is a series of failures strung together over the past 20 years and I will continue to fail. But those failures have taught me significant lessons that I wouldn’t trade for the world. My junior year of high school I began a battle with body image. I was extremely obsessed with working out and being fit, in the unhealthiest way. It was out of control, and by my freshman year of college I developed an eating disorder. It consumed by life: body, mind and spirit. I don’t specifically remember what changed, but by the grace of God he helped my hand through it all. He taught me that a heart completely in love with him is the most beautiful thing in the whole world. This doesn’t mean I don’t struggle with things, it just reminded me that I am not strong enough to go it alone, none of us are! God wants all of us, not just the “strong Kaylie” but the girl with the tear stained face, the girl who is broken. Where we see brokenness, God sees beauty. Failures lead us to brokenness which God turns to beauty ; its that beauty which should make us BOLD. Not just bold in our faith, bold in the way we live. The way we walk, talk, dance, and most importantly bold to just LOVE OTHERS. Boldness should lead us to bless others. So lets do it! You and me, let’s make a pact. Do not let our failures define us rather, let them point us toward unfailing love of Jesus Dear friend let’s leave it all at the foot of the cross, every day. When I shared my struggles of body image with one of my dearest friends I will never forget what she said, “Let’s go to IHOP and eat 100 pancakes and say SCREW YOU SATAN!” She is awesome. And that is exactly the boldness I want my life to be about. Clinging to truth, the unchanging promises of Christ, the kind that says, “SCREW YOU AND YOUR LIES SATAN. I’M ALL IN FOR JESUS, WHATEVER IT TAKES.” You might not struggle with body image but it could be relationships, school, family, so many things, you name it. We all struggle in different areas but here are 12 truths from Pastor Stephen Furtick about you that will NEVER change. I encourage you to write them down and read them EVERYDAY. EVERYDAY. EVERY darn day. It has helped me SO much and I am sure it will help you too. DOO IT. Let’s do it together sisters!
12 Audacious Faith Confessions 1). I am fully forgiven and free from all shame and condemnation. Romans 8:12; Ephesians 1:78; 1 John 1:9 2). I act in audacious faith to change the world in my generation. Joshua 10:1214; John 14:12 3). I have no fear or anxiety; I trust in the Lord with all my heart. Proverbs 3:56; Philippians 4:67; 1 Peter 5:7 4). I am able to fulfill the calling God has placed on my life. Exodus 3:912; Psalm 57:2; Colossians 1:2429 5). I am fully resourced to do everything God has called me to do. Deuteronomy 8:18; Luke 6:38; Philippians 4:13 6). I have no insecurity, because I see myself the way God sees me. Genesis 1:2627; Psalm 139:1316; Ephesians 5:2527 7). I am a faithful spouse and a Godly parent – my family is blessed. Deuteronomy 6:69; Ephesians 5:2225; Colossians 3:1819; 1 Peter 3:17 8). I am completely whole – physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. Psalm 103:15; Matthew 8:1617; II Corinthians 5:17; 1 Peter 2:24 9). I am increasing in influence and favor for the Kingdom of God. Genesis 45:48; 1 Samuel 2:26; Acts 2:37 47 10). I am enabled to walk in the sacrificial love of Christ. II Thessalonians 2:1617; 1 John 3:16; 4:9 12 11). I have the wisdom of the Lord concerning every decision I make. II Chronicles 1:712; Proverbs 2:6,
MODEL & FLORIST: NIKA FLOWERS WWW.ARINABPHOTOGRAPHY. COM LAGUNA B EACH, CA
PHOTOGRAPHER BLURB: When Angelic Magazine asked me to participate in a “Cross” theme annual issue, I knew right away that I wanted to use the most beautiful flowers to show Gods glory bloom. I also knew right away the perfect person to help me bring that vision to life: Meet Veronika from Nika Flowers. She studied in London and worked with top florists in Boston, and is now running a small business from home and taking care of her growing family. What sets her apart from other florists is her never ending love for God. She is a mother, a daughter, a wife and a sister, a florist, and most importantly a follower of Jesus. Flowers are the way for her to talk to God and to talk about God! Spending hours surrounded by flowers, Veronika finds peace and time to pray, and when she finally presents her creation to her clients she hopes it touches their hearts like it touches hers. “How can you not believe in God after seeing such beauty in just a single flower” she says.
FINDING JESUS
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MOLLY GREENBERG WAS DISCRIMINATED FOR BEING JEWISH. SHE BECAME AN ATHEIST. A ND THEN SHE FOUND JESUS.
By Sara Sloan olly Greenberg grew up in a small town in Connecticut- her family the only Jews and vegetarians. She felt lonely, different and separated from the world. Her family was strict and unaware of the trends in music, fashion, or even typical foods that everyone else was eating and enjoying. In her family, Greenberg says vegetarianism was the religion that controlled their life. When her dad didn’t get his way, he would hurt or hit them. Throughout school, Greenberg was considered the odd one. Kids would notice the “weird” meatless sandwiches she ate, she didn’t know anything about fashion so she had “bizarre outfits,” her family was poor; she didn’t relate well with the girls in school and had no friends. When she was in 2nd grade kids started calling her a “Jesus killer” and “bad person.” At 13, things got a little better when a family moved into town with a girl Greenberg’s age and the two became best friends. Her friend taught her about music, popular trends and helped her get involved in social activities. Soon, Molly started becoming involved in Jewish Summer camp, Hebrew School, and Jewish youth activities as well. “This is when all the horrific experiences happened,” she says. “I was attacked by a boyfriend, also attacked at summer camp, and a man moved to my town from Jordan who hated me for being a Jew.” That man would yell things to Greenberg like, “Jews should die. Hitler should have killed them when he had the chance,” and he would also draw swastikas on the outside of their home. Greenberg had enough; she was now an atheist and became angry with the world. “Family life wasn’t good, summer camp was ruined, and I didn’t trust boys anymore, my best friend moved away to college. I was at the point I just wanted to kill myself, I would dream about suicide a lot.”
When Greenberg went to college, one of her professors saw her potential and told her to meet her son who owned a private franchise business and could help mentor her. Greenberg ended up meeting him and his wife; they were welcoming, helpful and Christians. They started sharing books with her and one of them was about prayer. She thought the idea of prayer was stupid, but decided to try it anyway because the worst thing that could happen is she would be “speaking to thin air.” “I started praying and talking to God and began noticing my prayers getting answered.” Eventually, she was led to a church service one night. “The sermon was about how God loves you, no matter how bad you are,” says Greenberg. “They explained who Jesus was, why He died, and explained how in Leviticus they needed an animal sacrifice to atone for sin but instead of animals, God sent his Son Jesus Christ. Greenberg felt led to go forward and ask Jesus to come into her life. “I knew I was different, but I started praying, “Lord, are you really there, I don’t want to offend you since I am a Jew and was taught that Jesus was more of an idol.” Greenberg asked God who He was and that she really wanted to know Him. “I noticed these people (Christians) had peace in their eyes and I wanted that. One night I was sleeping and I felt Jesus at my bedside looking at me and looking into my eyes and into my soul. He looked saddened and said why don’t you believe me? To me ever since I have known He was real. Jesus answers prayers, He does love us.”
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PHOTOGRAPHER SPOTLIGHT: SAN CLEMENTE, CA - A GE: 28
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t a young age I learned to accept others sin and justify it in hopes that the wounds wouldn’t run so deep. That only led to allowing other to abuse me, drinking until the wounds went numb and living in repetitive cycle of pretending I was ok, poor choices, depression and trying to survive life. The truth is I was sinking quick and running out of options. Being raised in a “Christian” home, growing up in the church and knowing full well what the bible read, only left me more confused, hurt and angry with those around me and God. If God was sovereign why would he not deliver me? Blinded by the lies and sin, I walked away from the Lord and tried everything in my power to deliver myself. At 22 years old, I was working for the local Sheriff’s Department on the night shift. Alone in my office with too much time to think, I remember being so desperate for deliverance from this stronghold that sin had over my life; I fell on my knees before God so broken and hurting, I knew only the Lord could make me whole again. ”Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your soul. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30 I gave my life to Christ that night and was baptized in water a few months later. It didn’t make everything instantly great, it allowed the process of healing, forgiveness and reconciliation to begin and I am still working on these things. The Lord has redeemed me and made me whole, life has not been easy but I have strength and hope in Him who guides my path each new day. The Lord has blessed me with a Godly husband, who loves me like Christ loves the church. He prays with and for me and is so patient with my heart. The Lord has used him to soften my heart and learn to forgive and love unconditionally. We struggled with infertility after my daughter was born, many specialists told me the likelihood of bearing another live birth was near impossible and we were not candidates for IVF. Today we have a three year old daughter Matilda Charlotte, one year old twin boys Magnus Elijah and Micah Ragnar, and I am currently 4 months pregnant with baby number four. I chose to leave my career two years ago to minister in my home to my family and invest my time in my children. The desire of my heart is to raise Godly children with hearts for the Lord. I still struggle with forgiveness and realizing I am not responsible for others choices. The scars sometimes still hurt. I wonder if Jesus’ scars hurt when I sin against him and fall short of His glory.
MODEL: RUTH B RAICA HAIR & MAKEUP: ALICIA KASPER
PRAISE & WORSHIP L EADER REMEMPTION CHURCH - TEMPE, AZ A GE: 23
WHY DO YOU CHOOSE JESUS? Answered honestly, I don’t choose Jesus. I don’t choose Jesus on a daily basis. Regularly, like a happy little kid with a really bad idea, beaming with joy and pride and ignorance, I reject him, I choose not to choose him, thinking that I know better. I call that sinning. Thing to note is that I’m not even a cute little kid; my sin is gross and makes me entirely unlovable under all normal circumstances. But grace isn’t a normal circumstance. Grace comes in, this undeserved love, and in that love Jesus, chooses me. And thank God for it (literally). Apart from me meriting it in any way, he says, “Hey Sarah, I see you sitting there all messed up, helplessly thinking you can do this thing called life alone, I see you and yet, I love you.” I don’t choose Jesus, Jesus chooses me. He chooses me in His love, a love that allows me to love him in the first place. WHY MUSIC? When I think about the fact that God created music, this beautiful process for sound to go straight from our ears into our hearts, I get the willies. Few things prompt the same raw emotion that music does: when we hear a good song, we want to dance; when we hear a sad song, we are moved to feel a little melancholy. Music disarms us, leaving our hearts vulnerable and there is real beauty in it. I fundamentally believe that when we worship, God calls us to this same sort of vulnerability, to be honest with him; music serves as a tool to move our hearts towards sincerity. To me, this is what makes it pretty darn rad. I love that apart from reason, logic, and maybe even words, we have the opportunity to worship him from the core of who we are. In practice of this idea, one of my favorite things to do when I’m
alone is to hum my prayers to God. There are no words no premeditated thoughts, just moans and heartfelt emotion translated to sound. It makes my prayers honest and intimate. And I get to trust that he knows exactly what I’m saying. Because he’s God. And he happens to speak the language of hums. WHAT GOALS HAS GOD PUT ON YOUR HEART WITH MUSIC ? My goal every time I worship is to set myself aside. All too easily, I find I can shift my focus away from God and towards myself, especially when seen by so many people. The approval of others can easily become and idol rather than bringing a smile to the God of this universe. Compliments like, “Well done Lords; you sang beautifully” if left unchecked can throw my motivates in question, moving them away from humility in the fact that I am a servant through my talent and instead to seeking further validation and recognition from others. That, truthfully, is a tough road to navigate. I daresay that I fail often. In all of that, though, I am grateful because it gives me a greater understanding of God’s forgiveness and redemption. Even if my motivations are entirely self-serving, distorted, and wrong, he can still use me in spite of myself. WHAT’S THE BEST PART ABOUT HELPING TO LEAD PRAISE AND WORSHIP? The best part for me is being able to experience the church worship alongside me. I have a great appreciation for how uniquely each of us is designed and for the illustration of this diversity through how each person chooses to approach God in their worship. For some, it’s standing, arms
outstretched, singing at the top of their lungs, meeting God the joy and celebration of his creation. For others, it’s sitting, arms enclosed, softly singing and soaking in the welcomed smallness in comparison to the magnitude and beauty of God. In each style of worship I am privileged to see a different facet of God’s character glorified and thus, gain a greater appreciation of how vast my God is. He’s not limited in how he is praised. All that fancy language aside, nothing makes my heart happier than being able to hear my church sing collectively. It’s a brilliant sound. ONE DAY WHEN IT' S ALL SAID AND DONE, WHAT DO YOU WANT YOUR LEGACY TO SAY? I want my legacy to be a mosaic, a masterpiece created by hands more capable than my own, an illustration of beauty through intentionally broken bits. Living in this sharp and shattered world, a broken world, I’ve been more than a little cut up. I, like you and like everyone else
around us have been cut and those cuts left scars. I rejoice, though, that I am loved by a man who made scars and brokenness the most beautifully illustration of intentionality and selfless love. Scars to his hands, feet, and side and the love poured out through them gave me the capacity to use my scars to fulfill two simplistic yet profound commands: to love God and to love people. I hope to live a life of honesty, one that fully recognizes the truth of my broken nature yet also the truth that when cemented together by my creator, I have the capability to be beautiful in that brokenness and to humbly go out and do some good in this big ol’ world. PHOTOGRAPHY BY B RIANNA DOE
I
"I KNOW WHO I A M"
t took a lot of life and experience to realize this. Well, maybe not a lot of life since I’m only 29 years old. Even growing up in church with my family so much happened in my life before I realized that I was created by God, for God and to have an intimate relationship with Jesus. Through circumstances that were unfortunate in my life, at an early age I turned to different things to get rid of how I was feeling. Loneliness, bitterness, anger and selfishness were the many ways I would describe how I felt constantly before being captivated by the love of Christ. I believed so many lies about myself. I was ugly. I wasn’t worth anything. There was no point in living. My mom and dad didn’t love me. Surely, God didn’t create me for a purpose. Pain and hurt was what I was to deal with alone for the rest of my life. There was no way I could continue thinking these things every day and I needed something to mask the pain. I turned to unhealthy surface relationships with people that consisted of gossip, lies and drinking as well as smoking. I also, turned to sex with many men. I justified my actions because I didn't have a great relationship with my mom and my dad was never there. My sex life was something I kept secret for many years. Somehow it made me feel worth something for the moment only to realize that this too wasn’t helping anything. It only made me feel worse. In 2006, I had the opportunity to move to New Mexico and take a promotion with my job. I figured this would be the perfect time to start over with my life because where my life was headed was not good. After the first year of being there I realized that a location change wasn't what I needed. My eyes were opened by the Holy Spirit that I needed a heart change. Jesus found me. He got a hold of my attention and my life has been forever changed.
Immediately I realized that Jesus died for me and all my sin and shame was nailed to the cross thousands of years ago. I could now know Him and find my identity in Him, and not in the things of this world. I was not alone. He has given me a new heart and a new life. It's been a little over seven years since I've been following Jesus. Through Christ I am no longer the person I was. That person is dead. Anger and bitterness is not what controls me anymore. Sex is no longer my way of dealing with the challenges and pain of life. Abiding in Jesus is how I live my life. He is who satisfies and He is who strengthens me and carries me through life. I know who I am. I am a daughter of the King. I am beautiful! I am loved. I am not alone. I am free. I have joy. I have peace. The joy of The Lord is my strength. I have JESUS! He is everything I need. There are times when I'm tempted to believe lies, but because I have the Truth I choose to stand on His Word. Challenges, trials, hurt and pain are inevitable, but I thank God that His promises are true and who He is remains constant. I'm still growing everyday, but I'm growing as a kid who knows who she is and knows who her Father is! Jesus! I know who I am!
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MODEL: AMY S IRGHI PHOTOGRAPHER: JENNY TARAU LOCATION: PHOENIX, AZ
WHY DO YOU CHOOSE JESUS? I choose Jesus because his love and mercy for me is evident very single day. His loving sacrifice allows me to wake up each morning and feel free in his grace with absence of fear and condemnation. HOW DO STRIVE TO PORTRAY JESUS IN YOUR MARRIAGE? My marriage is one of the most precious things in my life. I try to portray Jesus in my marriage but loving my husband the way Christ loves me余 with mercy and grace. Christ's love is contagious. When I respond to my husband with a love like Christ, it encourages him to do the same which in return re足encourages me. It has made our marriage a blessed experience in both of our lives.
WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON MODESTY & FASHION? I feel that you can have the best of both worlds. That you can be fashionable and still be modest and respectful with your clothing as a Christian. I feel that a lot of Christians associate modesty with being plain but it doesn't have to be that way. The bible speaks of fine clothes and jewelry as something to cherish, not be opposed to. I feel that the Holy Spirit will guide each Christian to discern what is appropriate and what is not with respect to their bodies, but I do believe there can be a balance. HOW HAS YOUR LIFE CHANGED SINCE YOU'VE DEDICATED YOURSELF TO THE LORD? My mind and heart have completely changed since my dedication to the Lord from the way I view the world to how I respond to others. The more I seek the Lord the deeper, our relationship grows and the more love He pours into my heart.
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WHY DO YOU CHOOSE JESUS? I believe Jesus chose me, loved me first and pursued my life before I ever knew. He secured my life and my name for eternity through salvation. I rest in such peace knowing Christ died for us while we were at our worst. I do choose Jesus every day. I choose to obey and when I fail, which is often, I choose repentance. I am imperfect but will be made perfect through our Lord Jesus Christ. I gladly choose a life of submission to the one who created me. WHY DO YOU DO PHOTOGRAPHY? Photography to me is an outlet I cannot truly explain in words. To generate art as well as documenting life through photography fascinates me every day. It is a passion of mine that has started at a young age and will always be part of who I am. Being able to capture moments that can never be recreated or moments that are fleeting is truly a gift to me. I’m so thankful for this talent I believe the Lord has given me. WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON MODESTY AND FASHION? I believe whole heartily that a woman can be fashionable and trendy while being modest and classy. Society and media has changed the way many young women perceive beauty but I say a modest, simple girl shows confidence and grace. WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO ACCOMPLISH WITH PHOTOGRAPHY IN THE NEXT 5 YEARS? I would love to continue to document families, couples, children and simply life as it is. I would like to photograph raw and authentic people. To show true beauty, true tears and true love. There is so much beauty around us. I want to continue to photograph new parents holding their brand new baby and a 50 year anniversary where husband still looks at his wife as if they just said "I do". Each and every family displays love in a different way. What better gift than to be the one that view this behind a lens.
ONEDAY WHEN YOUR KIDS ARE FULLY
GROWN AND THEY ARE TO READ YOUR LEGACY, WHAT DO YOU WANT YOUR LEGACY TO SAY?
Years from now, I would like my children to look back and always know that I have constantly pursued loving Christ and loving people. I love for them to always remember that I've lived with a purpose and that purpose is to glorify Jesus.