A Full Life Mary Alma Mathlin (Nee Holmes)
13 FEBRUARY 1921 - 24 DECEMBER 2019
MARY’S LIFE_________________ 4 THE HOLMES AND SWAIN FAMILIES____________________ 8 GROWING UP AT “OAKHURST” BENTLEY____________________ 12 WORLD WAR II______________ 18 HOLMES FAMILY, BENTLEY____ 22 MARRIAGE___________________ 29 CHILDREN___________________ 35 MARY’S SAYINGS_____________ 41 ON THE MOVE WITH SHELL___ 42 GOOD TIMES (SETTLING DOWN) AT ST IVES __________________ 46 GRANDCHILDREN____________ 50 SPECIAL OCCASIONS_________ 57
MARY’S LIFE by DAVID MATHLIN
Mary Alma Holmes was born on 13 February 1921, in Casino NSW. Home was the property Oakhurst in the district of Bentley between Lismore and Casino. The second of 4 kids 4 1/2 years apart. Her father Herbert Holmes was an Englishman (one of a family of 14) who came to australia and went dairying, and growing crops, citrus and vegetables. 400 acres was the final holding. Herbert’s brother Ernest was a Church of England minister, who preceded him to Australia and had married one of the Swain sisters from Tamworth. There were 9 kids in the that family, descendants of Samuel Swain, a seventh fleeter. Through his brother, Herbert met Alma Swain, and married her in 1917. He was 39 and she was 24. So two brothers married two sisters. The families were always close and when Ernest died in his early forties leaving his wife with 6 children, no pension, no money, the extended family rallied and the twins come to live with the Oakhurst Holmes. There was no school until she was 8 and Mary was home schooled by her mother, until finally the community build the school themselves. Thereafter she used to ride a horse to school, except when there was flood, when they walked and climbed across logs. The first schoolteacher lived in a tent in the schoolyard. Later a timber house was moved to Oakhurst for the schoolteacher to live in. At primary school, one teacher taught 48 kids across all grades from 1-8. Early teachers included Charlie Steele, Ross and Robyn’s father, and Richie Benaud’s dad, Lou. Mary was sent out occasionally to teach the Italian kids English. She was regularly a recipient of prizes for her schoolwork. While her mates went to boarding school in Armadale or Brisbane, Mary stayed in her district and attended Casino high school. Her high schooling was somewhat interrupted by having to ride the horse to the station to catch the north coast mail train to Casino
and returning on it in the afternoon. She managed to attend 4/8 lessons each day. Later years she boarded in town. There were happy family memories at Oakhurst, named after the Holmes’ family property in England. They milked sixty cows. The kids-all 6 with the cousins - shot rabbits land killed snakes, and ran wild. Alma never worried about them when Mary was with them. Mary was the responsible one. The caring one. They swam in Back Creek and sometimes went by car to Kyogle to the baths. Herbert built a tennis court and that drew neighbours into the property for a weekly tournament. Everyone went to church once a month. Bentley received good rains and had abundant groundwater. It was surrounded by oak trees and fig trees. She loved the farm, but it was a tough life, carrying water to the kitchen and keeping firewood up to the stove. There was no power or refrigeration, the cream carrier brought ice. Herbert was very community minded and was a leader in the community. He loved cards with other men around the districts, sometimes accompanied by a rum. He was always working on the school house, or the district hall. And the farm. They must have been an affluent family because money came from England from time to time. They were the only family in the district with a car. After school she started working for Dr Hume at 17 as a dental nurse while she waited to be admitted to a nursing course, although this plan was interrupted by her fathers death and the outbreak of war. It was good money and she bought a car and she could afford to have dresses made for the local balls. But she could not wait to get home on the weekend. Mary’s brother Teddy was a tearaway. He joined the PMG at age 16, and boarded in Lismore, studied there, intending to do engineering. War came and he joined the RAAF. He was killed in Yugoslavia on active service at age 23. Her brother Norman, the oldest died at 44 of cancer. Because their father had died Norman was exempted from service to run the farm. The family along with two Italian POW’s ran the farm well and good wartime prices
Then it was to Rathmines on Lake Macquarie for 2 years as a dental nurse. There were dances and movies at the flying boat station, with a revolving door of airmen and crew coming through. At night they would take a boat out on the Her sister Nancy married an Edenville farmer, Reg Buckland, and had three lake with the boys and some beers. Often times they came to sydney in a flying kids, Roger and Rhonda and Judy. They worked hard and built a very viable boat to land at Rose Bay. She would stay with Kath Heffernan at Strathfield farm over many years. Cream to the factory, separated milk for the pigs and and go to Princes or Romanos or Carl Thomas’ with the officers. A pound calves, supplemented by corn feed. I remember many happy holidays on bought a bottle of champagne and that was the drink for the night. They were the farm with the cousins, and Mary loved siting around that kitchen table, an attractive pair. One night a lodger in the same building left a poem under discussing the latest North Coast news and her great interest people! the door, no doubt hoping for a favourable reaction from the girls. The poem But back to Bentley... Sunday lunch was a big occasion. Roast beef or lamb was addressed to “the two girls in blue”... it was signed Kenneth Slessor. or pork. Entertainment was saturday dances in the homes or halls horse Things were in short supply, even after the war. She enjoyed her ration of 120 riding excursions, tennis and card games. There were open air pictures cigarettes a month. Men’s ration was 240! She went home every 6 weeks and in Casino. She remembered little of the depression years because they remembered the celebrations when the war in the pacific ended. And then it supported themselves on the farm. People came looking for work or for was back home for her. food. There was always a helping hand. She enjoyed memories of special occasions with the family like flying with Sir Charles Kingsford Smith in Eric Mathlin came to Casino after the war, having joined the Shell company, the southern cross. They found him charming and flew around Casino, and to work with Dick Burnett. Dick introduced Eric to Mary. She thought he was down to the coast . She remembered a visit to Brisbane to see the England just a city boy at first. Then he asked her to the aero club ball at Tenterfield, test at the Gabba. Driving up in the old ford. Staying at an hotel for all 6 and so it developed over the subsequent months. At this time, Mary was flatting days of the test. They were in their teens, and this was her first taste of the with her mum in Casino. The wedding was in 1948, in Casino. Eric’s sister Joy city! In summer a train ran from Casino to Byron Bay every four weeks. and Kath Heffernan were bridesmaids and Eric’s great childhood and wartime It filled with young people hell bent on having a great time. There was mate Ron Turner and brother John were Best men. little there except the meat works, the butter factory, the great northern Casino hotel and the whaling station. She spoke of the war years with army camps After they were married, Mary and Eric lived in a flat in Casino. They outside Casino. Hard times on the land. Without the POW’s it would have heard about a house coming up in Diary Street, and knew the owners. Mary been impossible to find labour. And sad times. Some families lost all three approached them and agreed to rent the house. Furniture was short after the children. Mary enlisted and deferred the call up for some time to support war. They were lent a mattress. It sat on four cordial boxes for many months the farming efforts. She joined the airforce, and was initially posted to until the bedroom suite arrived from Sydney. Meantime they bought a block Kingaroy for 12 months. It was freezing in winter through the corrugated of land at south Casino. But before they built, Eric was transferred to Moree. iron hut. They rode on weekends, or hired a sulky. There were no houses there, so Mary stayed in Casino, Eric returning home
were available from selling potatoes etc to the Americans. Norman was a distinguished shire president in later years.
for 1 week every 6 weeks. Mary stayed at home or on the farm, at this stage with her newly born son-me! Family and friends looked after her. She felt very safe and comfortable in Casino. Eric then spent 3 months in Sydney only to learn that they were to be transferred to Maryborough, which was to be a 2 year posting. Townsville Townsville was next for 3 years. There was a tropical social life. Eric’s brother John lived with them. Plenty of golf and parties. The southern relatives stayed for extended periods. Brisbane Then to Brisbane for three years, renting for a while until buying at Indooroopilly-this became the pattern, settling temporarily while Mum (mainly) found something suitable to buy. She found a house in poor condition with river views, a large lot, and worked hard to get the garden in order. Mary painted it and fixed the garden. We lived there for 3 years. Rosemary was born there in 1958. New Zealand We then travelled to the NSW north coast and Sydney to say our goodbye’s and left the dog behind and settled in Wellington New Zealand in a rather grand, company provided, house with a large tennis court. We were there for two years. I have memories of long twilights and cold climate and much entertaining and visitors from Australia-particularly relatives. The extended family took every opportunity to explore the country over those two years, and we were very close. Adelaide Next it was Adelaide for 5 years, where Mary and Eric rapidly became part of a happy community. There were great schools for the kids. As previously Mum was busy with tuck shops, meals on wheels as well as running a household. Throughput these moves she enjoyed meeting people, took a great interest in them, their families and networks. These people became lifelong friends. Families like the Condon’s, Lane’s, Murphy’s, Johnson’s, Barr’s and Steed’s. She
enjoyed the school activities - sports, concerts, friends. She entertained business associates of Eric. They were a great team. And the constant moving probably brought us very close as a family - family was the only constant when we moved. Sydney Shell wanted them to go to Perth from Adelaide and they decided they had had enough moving. Eric successfully applied for a job with Blue Circle cement and we moved to Sydney in 1966. Initially living in a rented house at Roseville, and then at St Ives when a suitable house was identified. The initial half of her life had come full circle, back to his family and closer to hers, and to a place that was vibrant and full of opportunity for the kids. Except for an absence of two years when Blue Circle sent them to Melbourne in the mid seventies, she was to spend the second half of her long life based at St Ives-right till the end. With roots firmly reestablished nearer to families, and a sense of permanency, their life blossomed. She worked again for Wenona school with sewing bees, she worked for meals on wheels, for the Sydney City mission sewing and collecting things for charity sales. She enjoyed card days with a wide circle of friends, often linked into the charity work. They were welcomed into the Blue Circle group of friends. Mary continued to entertain, Christmas mornings were a great gathering of colleagues and relatives and friends and neighbours, Christmas lunch was a family celebration which drew together Eric’s brother and sister and their families with singing and carousing in the afternoon. Eric’s mother played the piano at these events, and that tradition continues to the present except that our next generations provide the music now after Christmas lunch. The Sydney family played tennis together for many years on Saturday afternoons. These families have been very close and the Mathlin in laws - Ken and Heather were very supportive of Mary in her final years. They attended the Sydney Symphony concerts and the Australian Ballet in the newly built Opera House. The whole family attended. They followed the theatre. Home was home for Rosemary’s and my friends and their families.
They stay close to this day - families like the Brown’s. Mates like the Nursey’s, Life continued. Each afternoon Mary and Eric sat together to discuss the day. Ashtons and the Kings. She says she enjoyed every day of their 62 year marriage. Tuesday night was dining in night for me, before I continued on to my tuesday night tennis- a Eric’s retirement in the mid eighties allowed travel within Australia and overseas. tradition that continued for 35 years They visited Mary’s north coast relatives and explored other parts of Australia. They travelled overseas and met that large number of cousins in the UK with People asked what was the secret of her longevity. She would reply it was the juice whom she had kept in touch by mail over all those years, meeting some of them of two oranges each day. I like to think it was the fact that she gave up smokingfor the first time, including cousin Ronald Holmes with whom they travelled on at age 67! several occasions, when he visited Australia. Following Eric’s death in 2010, we thought about her living arrangements. I They were surrounded by young people, including English backpacker relatives persuaded her to move into retirement living - I thought. When it didn’t happen, from the UK. Mary helped the Japanese neighbours with their english and both I reminded her of our agreement. She replied “ I know I agreed darling, but I girls boarded with them at the end of their schooling. Next along came the first didn’t say when did I?” of the 4 grandchildren. Holidays expanded to spending time as an extended And so she continued to live in the St Ives house until the end. It contained so family with Emma and then the van Leer kids. She took great joy from attending many happy memories and her life was centred on it. She wouldn’t leave it! And their school concerts and plays and sport, and was a loving and supportive and there was enormous support provided by many many people, including close interested Grandmother. They were actively involved for many years in the family, in-laws and their families, and friends. building projects which the Rose and I undertook. Always interested, supportive and prepared to help. This takes us through the nineties, a highlight of which She had a big heart. Sadly that failed her at age 98 after a long life. Just short of was the celebration of their 50th wedding anniversary with congratulations a third letter from the Queen! Just short of raising the bat - like Bradman really!! flowing from the many friends and relatives who gathered together, and a letter from the Queen of course.
She was of the generation that gave so much for my/our generation to enjoy peace and prosperity. Born in the shadow of the First World War, living through The years passed. Mary enjoyed cards very much. It kept her mind sharp and a depression, and experiencing tragedy and loss during the Second World War. was an opportunity to maintain her close friendships with many friends, some of Whilst that undoubtedly had a great impact on her, she was always optimistic whom went back to casino days. Sadly many have left us, but their next generation and positive throughout her life. kept close to Mary, such was the impact she made through her genuine interest She will be remembered by all those whom she touched as warm and interested in people, their lives and families. She put great effort into these friendships. She and supportive. As a mother she had high expectations but was fiercely supportive had a good memory, was a good listener, and always up for a chat about current of her tribe. She rarely judged or criticised, but she was intuitive and smart - she affairs or a reminiscence. knew what was going on. Their 60th wedding anniversary came and was again celebrated by (sadly) She really cared for people and perhaps that is why she had such a loving circle a smaller group of peers, but by an expanding next generation of family and of friends and family and that is how we should remember her. friends. And another letter from the Queen!
THE HOLMES AND SWAIN FAMILIES Samuel Swain was transported on 30 April 1832, his death sentence for stealing a sheep having been commuted. It was his second offence - in January 1830 he was sentenced to 6 months prison for stealing 14 bushels of wheat. On 5 December 1836 he petitioned for his wife, Patience, and four children (Mary Ann, George, John and Elizabeth) to join him. They departed on 29 April 1838 on board the female convict ship, the “John Renwick”. When Patience arrived in Sydney she had five children with her. It is believed the fifth, James*, from whom our branch of the family is descended, was the child of a female convict, Prudence Jenkins, who died on the voyage.
The Holmes Family 1892. Edward (21), Francis (23), William (25), Edith (26) Annie (16), Alfred (1836-1924), Herbert (Mary’s Father) (10), Ernest (8), Emma (1843-1933), Arthur (19), Marion (22) Agnes(15), Mabel(11), Ethel (14)
The Swain Family Back row, left to right: Alice Lucy, Vera Adelaide,· Arthur Stanley, Bertha Mildred , Alma Clarice (Mary’s Mother) Front row, left to right: Isabella Victoria, Albert Frank, James Arthur (Kilphysic Jim), Ethel Irene, Rebecca Lucy , Norman George
*Kilphysic Jim (pictured at left) is James’ son.
Mary’s Mother, Alma on her Wedding day
Alma and Herbert sign their nuptials
The Holmes family-Teddy, Mary, Herbert, Norman, Alma, and Nancy
GROWING UP AT “OAKHURST” BENTLEY
Mary at Oakhurst
The Holmes children, Mary in the middle
The Holmes family - Norman, Herbert, Nancy, Teddy, Alma and Mary.
Mary at Oakhurst
MARY’S FRIENDSHIP BOOK AT AGE 12
Mary driving friends at Oakhurst.
Mary’s first car before the war “Struggles”
WORLD WAR II
Kath Heffernan and Mary
Teddy and Mary on leave in Sydney, with Mary’s best friend Kath Heffernon and a friend
Training at Ascot Vale, Queensland in 1943
A poem to celebrate New Years Eve, 1944 with dedication from “Robbie”
Mary in uniform with nephew Roger Buckland
Mary and Kath Heffernan at the Casino show
THE WAAAF’S LAMENT We left our jobs and pretty clothes Why we did God only knows And now we handle picks and hoes Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody!
The Rathmines crew, Lake Macquarie
An invitation to a welcome home after the War
We used to think we were queens And dressed above our meagre means And now we’re wearing bloody jeans Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody!
The silken undies that we knew Are changed for bloody bloomers blue We look a bloody awful crew Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody!
The bloody skirts are bloody wrong The bloody tails are much too long The bloody things aren’t worth a song Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody!
It doesn’t matter if we’re dark or fair They make us cut our bloody hair We look just like the old grey mare Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody!
Poem The WAAAF’s Lament
We sleep upon a bed of straw And wake up bloody cold and raw However started bloody war Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody! We march around the bloody square The wind blows through our bloody hair We get no bloody time to spare Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody! The blood drill instructors shout We do our blocks, turn left about The Madam Tinker bawls us out Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody! The MO says there’s no alarm That we won’t come to any harm Sticks bloody needles in our arm Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody! Sweeping out behind the doors Scrubbing out all the bloody floors No time to wash our bloody drawers Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody!
Sitting on a lot of stools Like a bloody lot of fools Learning all the bloody rules Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody! Throughout the week it pours with rain But getting home is worth the pain And then there is no bloody train Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody! This weekend leave is what we hear Will we go dry? No bloody fear! But the pub’s run out of bloody beer Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody! The best damn place is blood bed With bloody ice on bloody head And then they think you’re bloody dead! Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody! No bloody parties, no bloody fun They keep us on the bloody run But still we’ll beat the bloody Hun! Oh Bloody! Bloody! Bloody!
When Norman and Mary went to high school they had to ride their horses down to the Bentley Railway Siding and catch a train to Casino.
HOLMES FAMILY, BENTLEY
Norman carried on the family property during the war and after. He married Mary Scarabelloti but they did not have children.
Herbert (known as Bert) was born in Reading, England. He came to Australia at the age of 30 years, and took up selection at Bentley during 1913.
While president of the council, Cr. Holmes represented it at three annual meetings of the Shire Association of N.S.W. in Sydney and a number of other important conferences. He was also council’s delegate to both the Northern Rivers Association Municipalities and Shires and the Northern Tourist Association.
Outside council circles, he took an active interest in civic affairs in the Bentley area where he lived most of his life on his farm. He was member of the Fairy Hill, “St. Mary´s Roman Catholic Church, Casino, was crowded for the funeral service Backmede Agricultural Bureau and the Fairy Hill Rural Co-operative. yesterday of former Tomki Shire president, Cr. Norman Alfred Holmes. The Member for Casino, Mr. Ian Robinson, paid the following tribute to Cr. Holmes: Cr. Holmes died in Richmond Private Hospital on Saturday, aged 44. He had been ill “The late Cr. Holmes will long be remembered for his untiring service to Local Government and to the community of the shire which he served. During his term as a for some time. shire councillor and as Shire president, much progress was achieved and at all times Because of illness he did not seek re-election as president of Tomki Shire Council he displayed a firm knowledge of the needs of the rural residents and the wisdom of last December. ensuring progress in shire matters.” He had been a councillor representing A riding on the council since 1956, and was The mayor of Casino, Aid. R. W. Manyweathers, who had a close association president for three years from 1959. He was returned to council unopposed in the Local with Cr. Holmes while he was shire president, described Cr. Holmes as a man Government elections last December. He was elected deputy president. of vision. Ald. Manyweathers said: “It was always his object for unity between The following is an extract printed in The Northern Star for a tribute paid to Norman Holmes shortly after his death on 2nd February, 1963, aged 44 years:
In November 1917, he married Alma Swain, daughter of James and Rebecca Swain of “Kilphysic”. The property was located between Tamworth and Gunnedah. They settled at Bentley which was part of Runnymede and began dairying. Bert was a keen photographer. He would develop all his own photos in a dark room which was part of the laundry. A tennis court was built beside the house on the property. Competitions were often held there. Bert and Alma’s first car was a T model Ford and many trips were taken visiting “Kilphysic” near Tamworth seeing Alma’s sister Alice who was married to Bert’s brother Ernest. They both were very proud when the Bentley Hall was built and they held regular dinner parties to raise money to pay for the building.
Members of the Buffalo Lodge and Tomki Shire Council employees formed a guard of honour at the church.
Bert passed away in 1942. Years later Alma remarried Alan Hobbs, known as “Ackie” and they moved to Brunswick Heads, then Lismore. After Alan predeceased her, Alma moved to Casino, and died in 1984.
Pallbearers were Cr. Sullivan, Cr. H. J. Shearman (1>resident of Terania Shire Council), Messrs. A. R. Hodges (Tomki Shire Clerk), D. Bond (chairman of Casino Co-operative Dairy Society and a former Tomki Shire president), J. G. Willis (Tomki Shire engineer) and A. J. Cowdery. At the graveside pallbearers were Cr. W. E. L. Hamilton, of Tomkl Shire, Cr. Shearman and Messrs. A. J. Riley, K. Casey, M. Maroney and F. Shepherd.
NORMAN ALFRED HOLMES Norman was the first born of Herbert and Alma’s four children, born in 1919. There was no school in Bentley then so Norman had to ride a horse over to One Tree Farm School. He was eight years old when he started school and he rode along with the Knapp children. Manifold School opened in 1929 and Mary, Edward and Nancy also attended there. Norman Holmes
Cr. Holmes is survived by his wife, Mary, his mother, Mrs. A. C. Hobbs, of Lismore, and two sisters, Mrs. Mary Mathlln of Adelaide and Mrs. Nancy Buckland of Edenville.
municipality and shire, realising that both are working towards the one end. He was also always a man of vision in matters relating to the extension of facilities in the shire, whether it was in regard to electricity or better roads.” President of the Tomki Shire Council, Cr. P. W. Sullivan, said Cr. Holmes would be greatly missed by his colleagues on the council. “The provision of bitumen roadways throughout the shire, acquisition of the plant and employment of the necessary staff had been his foremost concern.”
EDWARD JAMES HOLMES NUMBER 420946 - RANK PIL OFF - UNIT 104 SQN RAF Edward, known as Teddy, was born in 1923 and lived at Oakhurst all his life. Ted attended Manifold Public School and Casino High school, where he obtained his Intermediate Certificate. He undertook an engineering course at Casino Technical College, while working at Lismore Post Office as a telegraph messenger and later a clerk. Teddy was 6 feet tall (183 cms), with a lean build, fair complexion, green eyes and black hair. He got about on an old motor bike that he rebuilt. He was a fine tennis player, enjoying games on the family’s court, and also attended family house parties. In 1941, at the age of 18, Teddy joined the Royal Australian Air Force, rising to the rank of Pilot Officer. He trained in Australia and England before his posting to Italy as a Pilot Officer with the Royal Air Force 104 Bomber Squadron. He saw many months service with the Central Mediterranean Forces. Teddy was nearing the end of his tour of duty when the Wellington bomber he was piloting disappeared while laying mines in the Danube River in Yugoslavia. The family hoped that Teddy and the crew had been rescued by Tito’s partisans, and would return safely home, but in fact, they had lost their lives on 2 July 1944. Teddy was only 21 years of age. Teddy and the crew were laid to rest at the Belgrade War Cemetery. Teddy Holmes
A letter from the King
Tribute to Teddy Holmes
NANCY MAY HOLMES The following is the eulogy at the funeral of Mary’s sister, Nancy. Nancy was born Nancy May Holmes in 1924 in Richmond Private Hospital, Casino. She was the daughter of Herbert and Alma Holmes, nee Swain. Her father, Herbert Holmes, had come to Australia from England following his brother Ernest, in the early 1900’s. In Australia, the Holmes brothers married two sisters, Alma and Alice Swain. Naturally, the families were then, and remain very close. Herbert and Alma settled at Oakhurst, Bentley in 1916 - Oakhurst, named after the family property in England. Nancy was the baby of the family. She was born after Norman, Mary and Teddy. She was born prematurely and the tiny baby was wrapped in cotton wool and fed condensed milk. The doctor subsequently gave her a silver mug to celebrate her survival! Oakhurst Bentley was a dairy farm primarily, planted with many fruit and citrus trees. The tennis court was used widely and was the centre of social life in the district. It was a happy community life and Nancy thrived as the youngest child in such an environment. Everyone helped on their neighbours farms. House parties were held to raise money for community projects such as the Bentley Hall. Meat and produce would be shared with neighbours.
All four children were born at Oakhurst. The Manifold Public School opened in 1929 and children attended it, riding to school on horseback.
signal to return to one of the daily meals that were served up from that wooden stove.
Nancy then attended Lismore High School by bus, along Holmes Road. She did well at school, sang in choirs and continued her tennis. Weekends were spent helping on the farm before social activities began.
Nancy worked hard supporting Reg on the farm, running the kitchen and raising her family. The daily routine was broken by tennis on the weekend, church once a month at Cedar Point, and the Kyogle Show was the highlight of the annual calendar.
And it was at one of the local dances that she first met Reg Buckland who used to ride across from Edenville to attend the dances. After courting for two years they were married at St Marks, Casino in 1943. Nancy had been christened and confirmed here also. Nancy was 19, Reg 22, and they settled on Reg’s family farm at Edenville, which Reg and Nancy took over from Harold ‘Pop’ Buckland soon after. Happiness and sadness soon followed. Brother Teddy was killed in service in 1944. That same year, Roger was born, followed by Rhonda in 1947 and Judy in 1951. Both Nancy and Reg spent long hours working the farm in the dairy every day, twice a day where they milked 80-90 cows. The kids used to watch them from their prams. After feeding the calves and collecting eggs Nancy would take the kids up to the house and prepare the next meal on the wood stove. The children attended Edenville Public School and then High School. In later years, they roamed free on the farm, playing in the creeks with friends and relatives. The sheet hanging on the line was the
The house was always open to visitors, especially around Sunday lunch, served at the dining table on an immaculately starched cloth, ironed with a petrol iron. Visitors included anyone who happened to be working on the farm, neighbours, relatives such as the Stutters, Corbell’s, Norman Holmes and by Mary’s family who often visited from Queensland. Gradually the children left home and married, leaving Reg and Nancy at Edenville where they continued to work the farm. They had introduced a large piggery and reduced the cow herd, but it was still hard work. They sold the farm in 1980 to Snow and Marie Ellis who became great friends. Reg and Nancy then moved to High Street, Casino. Reg still loved the land and they bought two small properties which Nancy continued to help with. When Reg started mowing lawns, the business grew quickly and Nancy ran the appointment book and the accounts. Retirement allowed some rest and some well deserved holidays exploring Canberra and particularly Western Queensland, which they both loved.
At this stage, grandchildren became a major part of their life. Five grandchildren were born and Nancy is survived by ten great grandchildren. Nancy worked hard maintaining the home and the garden, supporting the family enterprises and her hospitality never stopped. Nancy’s health deteriorated over the past 10 years, requiring a number of operations and keeping her close to home. There she has been supported by her family and close friends like Marie Ellis and the home care staff from Southern Cross. Nancy passed away last Thursday. She is survived by Reg and an extended loving family. Nancy lived a hard life, but it was a labour of love. Community was strong both at Bentley and Edenville. Nancy accepted people as they were and everyone was welcome at her table. It was the centre of life for her family and friends and we will miss her table as we will miss her. Her warmth, her social nature, her welcomes and her love.
MARRIAGE
Alma Holmes at her 90th birthday celebration with her two daughters, Mary and Nancy (Buckland)
Rhonda and Judy Buckland
Eric and Mary with Nancy and Reg
The Buckland family - Judy, Reg, Rhonda, Roger and Nancy
The Wedding Invitation
The Marriage Certificate
Mary and Eric
The beautiful bride
The wedding party - Kath Heffernan, John Mathlin, Mary, Eric, Joy Mathlin, Ron Turner, Roger Buckland and Kath’s niece at front
First House in Diary Street Casino
First Car outside the First House
A family outing with grandmother, “Wyps” - Eric’s mother
Mary at the Kyogle show - about 1950
CHILDREN
At a Casino ball-Dick and Joan Lane at left, and from right, Joy, Eric, Mary, and John Mathlin
The newly married couple at Evans Head
Mary and Eric in Casino with David
Mary with baby David
David and Rosemary at the Bucklands farm at Edenville
David and Rose
Mary with David and Rosemary in Wellington NZ
David and Rosemary in New Zeland - July 1960
Mary and kids in Wellngton
David’s graduation
Mary with her Mother and Daughter in the mid 60’s at the Summit restaurant
Rose’s graduation
Mary and Rosemary returning to Casino in 1963
MARY’S SAYINGS an extract from the eulogy given by ROSE
Mary would be happy as a box of birds to see so many of the people she loved here today. Although she might not appreciate the reason for this gathering - she loved life and did not want to give it up. Even when she was no longer as fit as a fiddle, when asked “how are you” she would always reply “getting there slowly but surely”. It is astonishing how many of Mary’s expressions have made their way into the lives of people who spent time with her. People were exhorted to “get your brain in gear”. Mary was always “ready for action”, possibly after spending a penny. When a problem was sorted we’d be cooking with gas. Nobody just left, they’d be off with the speed of 40 cats, or they might shoot through like a Bondi. Unfortunate events - even calamities - were dismissed because worse things happen at sea. Although some things were just “bloody ridiculous”. Incompetent people were “hopeless”, but Mary rarely got “the pip” with them.
Family Christmas in the 80’s
Mary and her family at David’s 70 th birthday celebration. She loved catching up with all the mates
A drive always involved commentary on whether there was not much traffic or a lot of traffic, and whether we were getting or missing all the lights. As her eyesight faded, these remarks
bore only incidental resemblance to the reality. She always expressed horror at the number of old houses that had been “knocked flying” for home units which were either “disgusting” or “beautiful”, but we could never work out the aesthetic criteria which were being applied. Mary loved the family home which she shared with my father for forty years. There were constant visitors and constant phone calls, right till the end. Mary had a wide circle of long standing friends and in many cases the friendship extended to the children of those friends. She was warm and welcoming, she cared deeply about people, she seemed to invite confidences, and she never forgot any detail of people’s lives. She liked a laugh and never whined. Well, that’s the story. I hope you’ve all got the picture.
ON THE MOVE WITH SHELL
Mary- Wellington NZ Home in Townsville
Home in Brisbane 41 Riverview Tce Indooroopilly
Picnic in Townsville with the Murphy family
Mary - Wellington NZ
The family departing to NZ from Brisbane
Mary and David in Wellington, NZ
Visiting Sydney in the 50’s with Eric’s sister Joy and her husband Ken Jones
Road trip NZ to Otira - Mary, the kids and Eric’s parents Wyps and Bert
Road trip in NZ to Franz Josef Glacier with Eric’s brother John and Eric’s parents
Mother and Daughter in Wellington Gardens NZ
Mary and Rosemary in NZ-July 1960
Rose’s birthday - Adelaide
Adelaide 1965, First day at school
GOOD TIMES (SETTLING DOWN) AT ST IVES
At home at St Ives
Happy in retirement
Rose and Jane Henderson relaxing poolside
Christmas 1986 at St Ives with the Mathlin families
The family at St Ives with Julian van Leer, Rose’s future husband
Mary and the Grandchildren at St Ives 2005
Mary with sister Nancy, her mother and families in the 70’s
The extended family 1996
Christmas at St Ives 2000
Mary with nephew Roger Buckland
GRANDCHILDREN
Mary and Eric with Emma, their first grandchild in Melbourne
Family celebrating the birth of the first van Leer (Isabella) and the second grandchild. Julian’s sister Madeleine on the right
Mary with Teddy
David, Emma, Mary in the Melbourne botanic gardens
Isabella, Teddy and Mary
Mary with Ruby
Mary with Isabella
Isabella and Teddy
Rose and her family
Mary and the grandchildren with Emma’s friend Grainne at Mackarel beach - About 1997
Mary’s grandchildren, Ruby, Isabella and Ted - 2011
OUR GRANNY BY EMMA COSGROVE
Our Grandmother was our loving matriarch. It didn’t take much for us kids to make her happy - a phone call, a post card, a fridge magnet, a good university mark, a visit, and a kiss before you left. If you didn’t visit for a while, she would quietly mention it to someone else, knowing the message would get back to you, but deep down she understood. Last week, as we said goodbye to Granny, I thought of how lucky Isabella, Ted, Ruby, Joe and I have been, to have her with us for as long as we did. Not only with us, but a close part of our lives. It is rare for a grandparent-grandchild relationship to be so essential and so long-lasting. Up until her final days, our granny had more energy and interest in life than anyone I’ve ever met. She was a great collector, and teller, of people’s stories. And she had incredible stories of her own. At Dad’s 70th this year, the family installed her on the couch and the queue of people waiting to speak to her went into the next room. Her strong memory stayed with her until the end. She recalled stories of childhood on the farm, her first job, service years, marriage and parenthood, all with remarkable detail. Right down to the number plate on their car when David, my Dad, was born. This was how the doctor was able to locate Granddad in town, and let him know that his son had been born. The kind of love Granny felt for her family was love without condition. She may not have approved of everything we did, but she never lectured or lost her temper with us. She just kept loving us, quietly letting us know that she was there, and she had our back. Emma and Joe, regular visitors to Granny at St Ives
Emma’s graduation
I remember an occasion at St Ives plaza where we’d gone to do some shopping, and have a meal at Pappas restaurant (where she knew all the staff by name). I was driving a borrowed ute, and in the unfamiliar setting, proceeded to drive the wrong way through the narrow car park, and block the oncoming traffic. Another driver wound down her window to have a go at me. Granny, who had been silent to this point, leaned over from the passenger seat and muttered, ‘why don’t you mind your own business’. More recently, during one of Granny’s stays in the SAN hospital, we brought her mail up for her. The same sex marriage survey was enclosed. I offered to fill it out for her, and asked what her stance was on the matter. She said, ‘well, you can vote yes from me darling, but I still don’t think women should play football’. It’s funny the things that come to mind - kleenexes stuffed in her sleeve, big silver earrings, bright sweaters, tuna mornay sprinkled with chips, and Nice biscuits dipped in her morning cup of tea, as we sat together in bed. We didn’t always pull them out in time to avoid a soggy build up at the bottom of her cup, but she didn’t mind. I will always associate Tuesday nights with hearty four-course dinners at St Ives cheese and crackers with a pickled onion, lamb and potatoes, sweets, a funny tea and a ruby chocolate - named after the youngest of her grandchildren. I will think of Granny at other moments - at 4.30, when you should never ring because the Bold and the Beautiful was on, and at 5 o’clock, refreshments hour, when she would enjoy a beer and a debrief with Granddad in their respective arm chairs. We were lucky to have our Granny for as long as we did. It was her family, her many friends - and the juice of two oranges each morning - that helped her to live such a long and happy life. Today, we have the opportunity to share her stories with one another. And I look forward to sharing mine with you, to keep her memory alive.
OUR GRANNY
BY ISABELLA VAN LEER I feel very lucky to have had so long with Granny, so that I could have a relationship with her both as a child and an adult. Growing up in Sydney, I spent a fair amount of time with Granny and Grandpa when I was young. Early Christmases were spent in the pool at Granny and Grandpa’s, with Granny bobbing around the pool perched on a basketball joking that she was laying an egg. One of our favourite pastimes at sleepovers at Granny’s was to go over the road to the high school and collect lost golf balls from the scrub - now it sounds like a funny thing to have done but at the time it felt like they had organised a treasure hunt just for us. As an adult, one of the things I really value about my relationship with Granny is the perspective it gave me on the different ways that people of different generations have of relating to one another. My generation tends to be more open in expressing our feelings, while for Granny, saying “I love you” wasn’t the way she operated.
Granny is the only grandmother I grew up with, so my image of what a Grandma is will always be based on her - in my mind she was the quintessential Grandmother. The pop culture/fairytale version of a Grandma is something out of little red riding hood - a sweet little old woman who dotes on their grandchildren but maybe doesn’t have much by way of personality. But as much as Granny did dote on us and lived up to her fridge magnet “grandma’s the name, spoiling’s the game”, she was far from that docile stereotype. Granny stayed engaged with the world, watching Landline every week, as she was a country girl at heart. Whenever there was a development in politics, I would always look forward to dissecting it with Granny, to hear her sharp, usually cynical take and the next round of teasing between us of which politician was the other one’s boyfriend – Vicki Campion will be breathing a sigh of relief she’s gone. Granny had a wicked sense of humour and called it like she saw it so always made me laugh. We also had a very tender loving relationship and I will miss her very much.
SPECIAL OCCASIONS
Instead, we felt her love for us in her actions. Granny expressed her love in the way she would always ask what time an important event such as an exam was, so that she could be thinking of us at the time, and you always knew she was thinking of you. Once Granny figured out the one kind of cake that Teddy liked, she would make it every time we came up and give him bigger and bigger pieces til eventually he always had a third of a cake to himself. She asked us to write down our uni subjects or other life milestones on a pad of paper by the phone so that she could “skite” about us with her many callers – even at her age, I’m sure her social life was more active than most people’s could hope to be! And as many friends as she had herself, she always remembered our friends’ names and specific details about their life. Another Birthday celebration with loving granddaughter
Extended family in Sydney in the early 70’s. Mary’s mother Alma is on the left
Mary and Eric with cousin Ronald Holmes, visiting from England - Sydney Harbour
The card girls at St Ives celebrating a birthday
Mary, Ken, Joy, Heather and John at St Ives - The “inlaws”
Mary’s exended family during a visit to the North Coast - The Bucklands
Mary’s 80th Birthday at Balmoral 2001
Extended family at the squadron for fathers day 2000
The card girls down to business
Celebrating a birthday at David’s house in Naremburm
PETE’S POEM
at the 50TH ANNIVERSARY 1. Now gather round dear people For there’s a tale I have to say A story that started long ago In countries far away. 2. Mathias Mathlin was from Finland And the ocean he adored He sailed across the ocean blue Unto our shining shores. 3. Now Mathias fathered Bertram A railway engineer And Bert and Dorothy bore a son, Young Eric, with his blonde curly hair. 4. Herbert Holmes he was British And to these shores he came And with his brother Ernest They married the sisters Alma and Alice Swain. 5. Herbert fathered Mary And they lived Casino way Young and wild that farmer’s child With always much to say.
6. These children of the earth grew up As clouds of war did fall As you’d expect of Aussie kids They rallied to the call.
12. From Maryborough to Townsville For Eric to represent Shell They followed the van through track and stream and survived, the trip from hell.
18. Amongst the grapes and stonefruit, Mary fills preserves in jar, David gets his licence, And promptly rolls the car.
7. Eric joined the Army Mary took to the air And when at last peace was declared They joined the laughter everywhere.
13. Townsville was a special time For life was trough and peak And just on thoughts about this time John Mathlin, now will speak.
19. Happy days were in that town, Of which there is much more, Close friends the Johnstons saw it all, So Cob, please take the floor.
8. Eric found himself at Casino He took the gamble of his life With a dental nurse, named Mary He took her for his wife.
14. In the 60’s, its off to Brisbane A home at Indooropilly Celebrated the birth of Rose And generally acted silly.
20. But all good things come to an end, For Adelaide, it was goodbye New job, new place, in ‘68 And to Sydney they did fly.
9. The wedding was a country bash They came from far and wide John Mathlin rode his BSA bike Eric waltzed with his bride.
15. Then a move to New Zealand Of wind and foggyshroud Twilights, tennis and Rugby Union In the land of the long white cloud.
21. Now Eric loves his sailing And about this time he found At twilight time with Shipper Dave He’d be Antares bound.
10. It was a time of coupons and rationing Regulation for food and rent Ben Chifley was our leader And the beer from Brisbane was sent.
16. Much travel was undertaken Over the short respite Now we’ll hear from dear New Zealand friends Owen Steele’s here tonight.
22. The gun would fire to start the race The tension reached its peak But through the yells, the screams and calls Eric would softly speak.
11. Of houses, there was a shortage For everything had queues, So Mary reserved this couple’s house By depositing her shoes.
17. In ‘62 farewell to Kiwi Hulllo Adelaide town, Wattle Park, the place of Crow A place to settle down.
23. And oft as not his cool advice Would catch the Skipper’s ear And as the sum set in the West We’d settle for a beer.
24. To drive into a Police car Is a silly thing to do And if you or I, did such a thing, We’d sure be in the poo.
30. Finally came retirement And years we know they’ll relish Golf and cards, quiet times These days we know you’ll cherish.
25. “Where’d you get your licence, son” The Sergeant he enquires “Why in the Army”, Eric said, The Sergeant just rolled his eyes.
31. Grandchildren make the circle The circle of life complete Teddy, Isabella and your little Emma And patter of more little feet.
26. Eric’s joined Blue Circle And they are down to Melbourne sent He manages Victoria Portland While Mary joins the Toorak set.
32. Our tribute to this loving pair By verse, of quality poor Mary, strong determined, kind, Eric, gregarious and the core.
27. But soon they’re back in Sydney, Mary’s working for the cause Raising money left and right Through tea’s, and sales and stalls.
33. Now everyone please stand tonight, Except for Eric and Mary Join Rosie and I, and raise your glass To this golden anniversary.
28. Now David has a friend or two he lets his parents meet And one who meet them around this time Is a lawyer, we call Pete.
34. We drink to you, Eric and Mary Our praise is sincere and loud We stand and salute your 50th And your achievements, of which we are so proud.
29. They take the European tour An adventure, to lift the fog London and Greece, Paris and Nice With Cousin Ron and his seeing eye dog.
Sydney relations at the 50th Wedding Anniversary at the Squadron - Peter Ashton (aka William Wordsworthless) at left
Letter from The Premier (Bob Carr) - 50th Wedding Anniversary
Letter from Peter Collins - 50th Wedding Anniversary
Letter from The Prime Minister - 50th Wedding Anniversary
Eric, Mary, Heather and John - 50th Wedding Anniversary
Peggy Brown, Rita Steed and Mary - 50th Wedding Anniversary
Emma, Isabella and Teddy at the 50th anniversary
Christmas 2006
Mother’s day
Grandaughter Ruby turns one
Father’s Day was always celebrated
Mary’s Birthday 2006
Niece Gina’s wedding 2003
Christmas 2008
73th Reunion at Manifold Public School
Letter from The Queen- 60th Wedding Anniversary
Letter from The Prime Minister - 60th Wedding Anniversary
Letter from The Premier (Morris Iemma) - 60th Wedding Anniversary
Peggy Brown and Chris P.D. at the 60th Anniversary
Emma and Ruby present the rug that the grandchildren made to celebrate the 60th anniversary
Emma and Mary at the 60th Anniversary
With the Family at the 60th Wedding Anniversary
Extended family celebrating mothers day around 2014
Placing Eric’s Ashes 2010
Mary’s 90th Birthday
Birthdays were always celebrated. Here with Linley Vellacott at Gordon. 2018
Mary’s 90th Birthday with David and Emma
All the girls-Granny’s 95 th birthday at Balmoral
ODE TO MARY at the 95TH BIRTHDAY
It breaks my heart, Dear Mary, that today I cannot be there, To join the great celebration In which you all do share. But let me speak plainly now, as I generally do, About Mary, and her impressive life, And of her family too. Mary Holmes started out As a true Casino honey, (That’s Casino the town, of course, not a place to lose one’s money). And life out there, as you well know, it gave her a real education. And the characters that it produced became the heart of our fair nation. She trained up as a nurse for years, indeed a most difficult trip. But I doubt there were many patients who gave her any lip.
Because though she’s full of compassion, and here I’ll give you the drum, If you aren’t a straight shooter with our Nurse Mary, you’ll get smacked right on the ..... proverbial!
She shared her folks’ interest in politics, Became a lawmaker with a left lean. And it was here that she found her match: lawyer-muso Jules van Leer.
So Mary well done! In your ninety fifth year, you’re the inspiration to us all. Did the Queen send a congratulatory spiel? Or maybe just give you a call?
Then her love of Eric Mathlin, it took her many places. She viewed new towns and cities too, and met so many faces.
Well Mary’s family has expanded now, as often is the score. One day the first Grandchild had joined the world, Next thing, there were four.
I suppose her majesty ought to have known to save her royal rambling, and call any other night than Thursday. Everyone knows Mary’s gambling!
Before settling for a time in Melbourne, Adelaide and then St Ives, She already had made lifelong friends in the shell boys and their wives.
Emma, Isabella, Teddy and Ruby, Fine adults to be revered. Although it’s no secret to our Ted; Granny doesn’t admire the beard!
I now join with your friends and family, Those here today, those nearest and furthest, In wishing you a wonderful 95th Birthday.
February 1949, The midwife pronounced, ‘a son!’ The doc set Mary up with a smoke, And went to find Eric in town.
But she loves her tribe unconditionally, even as it continues to grow. Camilla, and her boys Tom and Gus, and a garbage man named Joe.
Sincerely,
Nine years did young David have, Only child without play mate, Then along came sister Rosemary In 1958.
Mary’s fit as a fiddle - a Stradivarius! And as bright as bright can be. She’ll chat to you most happily Over a cup of funny tea.
A bright young sister to challenge her seniors, and keep big brother in line. Champion high jumper and lover of horses, And, like David, a good red wine.
She doesn’t hold back an opinion or two, On our politics or sporting lives. I asked her about sex one day you know, She said ‘that isn’t discussed in St Ives’.
William Wordsworthless.