The Unofficial Jeremy Corbyn Annual 2018 - Press sampler

L 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% 100% UNOFFICIAL UNOFFICIAL 100% 100% UNOFFICIAL UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 10

UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100

N ANNUAL Y B R O C Y M E R JE THE UNOFFICAL E BOXES! R U S A E L -P A Z Z E JE TICKS ALL THOS NER DFULLNESS COR X PERSTAR DATAFA POLITICAL SU MASKS CORBYN FUN HACKS LABOUR LIFE H) E WORD(SEARC JEREMY IS TH STRIP HE REDS COMIC CORBYN OF T Y VE PHOTOSTOR LABOUR OF LO E AIN DRAIN GAM CORBYN’S BR STORIES ENCHANTING A PICS DREAMY JEZZ CROSSWORD

                        Q&A   JC FASHION TIPS Y   MAZES TURES OF JEREM N V E D A G IN Z A   THE AM LADDERS   WASPS AND   JAM E JEREMY E E BEARD ON TH H T IN P THE DIFFERENC   T O P S T O -D O T ME IN DOT  FUN COLOURLA AME AND DDERS G S P S A W   RBYN   A CHRISTMAFSYCO EAR ALS O ESTERY U N N A   AND MORE!!  ORE,  M

, E R   O M   CORBYN’S KIN

CORBYN FUN MASKS! CORBYN CROSSWORD! CORBYN STORIES! CORBYN PICS! CORBYN MAZES! Q&A! JAM! BENN! MARX!

..................... 6 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. . . als Hey, Guys and G ...................... 7 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. n y rb o C Datafax – Jeremy ....................... 8 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. rd Corbyn Crosswo ry .................. 10 to s to o h P e v o L f Carol’s Labour o 4 .........................1 ... ze a M t’ lo P e Jeremy’s ‘Lost th 5 ...........................1 .. .. .. .. .. . . y a M a s Datafax – There 6 ......................... 1 .. ... s ck a H e if L 0 Jeremy’s Top 1 18 ........................... .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..

Ask Jeremy .... ........... 20 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. . .

Cabin Captain Corbyn's ................ 22 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ........

JC Q&A ............... ................ 24 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. e m a G rain Corbyn's Brain D ................... 26 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ... r a e ry Annuals of Yeste ...................... 31 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. . . t n e The Secret Allotm ...................... 34 .. .. .. .. .. .. tt o b b A Datafax – Dianne ...................... 35 .. .. .. .. .. . . k s a M n u Jeremy Corbyn F ....................... 37 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..

Ooh, Jeremy! ......

8 .......................... 3 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. . . y m Le Tour de Jere 9 .......................... 3 .. .. .. .. . . in a g A s e Bigmouth Strik ... 40 ............................ .. .. .. .. ... n y rb o C The Name is .............. 42 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. an .....

Jeremy Corby-W

Viva Tea .............

............................

..................... 43 ............................ ...................... 44 Jeremy Corbyn W ith Cap Fun Mas k ................. 45 Corbyn of the Re ds ........................ ................... 47 Jeremy’s Top Ten Fashion Tips ...... ................... 52 Datafax – Tony B lair ........................ ................... 54 Ohh Jeremy Corb yn PVG ............... .................... 55 Fun Colour Me In Dot-To-Dot Spot The Difference ... ................... 56 Pin the Beard on the Jeremy ......... .................. 58 Corbyn’s Kindfu lness Corner ...... ..................... 60 Datafax – Boris Jo hnson .................. .................. 62 The Amazing Ad ventures Of Jere my .............. 63 Jeremy is the Wo rd (Search) ........ .................... 68 Other Jeremys ... ............................ ..................... 70 Wasps & Ladders ............................. .................. 72 Datafax – Michae l Gove .................. ................... 74 A Christmas Corb yn ........................ ................... 75 Answers ............. ............................ ..................... 78 Photo Credits ... ............................ ...................... 80 Hope ..................

..................... 6 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. . . als Hey, Guys and G ...................... 7 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. n y rb o C Datafax – Jeremy ....................... 8 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. rd Corbyn Crosswo ry .................. 10 to s to o h P e v o L f Carol’s Labour o 4 .........................1 ... ze a M t’ lo P e Jeremy’s ‘Lost th 5 ...........................1 .. .. .. .. .. . . y a M a s Datafax – There 6 ......................... 1 .. ... s ck a H e if L 0 Jeremy’s Top 1 18 ........................... .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..

Ask Jeremy .... ........... 20 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. . .

Cabin Captain Corbyn's ................ 22 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ........

JC Q&A ............... ................ 24 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. e m a G rain Corbyn's Brain D ................... 26 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ... r a e ry Annuals of Yeste ...................... 31 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. . . t n e The Secret Allotm ...................... 34 .. .. .. .. .. .. tt o b b A Datafax – Dianne ...................... 35 .. .. .. .. .. . . k s a M n u Jeremy Corbyn F ....................... 37 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..

Ooh, Jeremy! ......

8 .......................... 3 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. . . y m Le Tour de Jere 9 .......................... 3 .. .. .. .. . . in a g A s e Bigmouth Strik ... 40 ............................ .. .. .. .. ... n y rb o C The Name is .............. 42 .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. an .....

Jeremy Corby-W

Viva Tea .............

............................

..................... 43 ............................ ...................... 44 Jeremy Corbyn W ith Cap Fun Mas k ................. 45 Corbyn of the Re ds ........................ ................... 47 Jeremy’s Top Ten Fashion Tips ...... ................... 52 Datafax – Tony B lair ........................ ................... 54 Ohh Jeremy Corb yn PVG ............... .................... 55 Fun Colour Me In Dot-To-Dot Spot The Difference ... ................... 56 Pin the Beard on the Jeremy ......... .................. 58 Corbyn’s Kindfu lness Corner ...... ..................... 60 Datafax – Boris Jo hnson .................. .................. 62 The Amazing Ad ventures Of Jere my .............. 63 Jeremy is the Wo rd (Search) ........ .................... 68 Other Jeremys ... ............................ ..................... 70 Wasps & Ladders ............................. .................. 72 Datafax – Michae l Gove .................. ................... 74 A Christmas Corb yn ........................ ................... 75 Answers ............. ............................ ..................... 78 Photo Credits ... ............................ ...................... 80 Hope ..................

0001

JEREMY CORBYN Hey Guys and Gals!

FICIAL JEREMY

it – it’s the UNOF Can you believe L 2018?!

CORBYN ANNUA

e Word(search), th is y m re Je e nd th d Inside you will fi ntic Corbyn-base a m ro (a e v Lo f o cal Carol’s Labour r favourite politi u o y ll a f o X FA photostory), DATA , comic strips of a zz Je f o s ic p y m orbyn superstars, drea of Jeremy and C s re tu n e v d A g n mes The Amazi &As, plus fun ga Q s, rd o w ss o cr sps of the Reds, in Game and Wa ra D in ra B ’s n y sks including Corb super-fun JC ma t u b is th ly n o t ally and Ladders. No ell as the magic w s a p e ke d n a t yn’ to cut ou ‘A Christmas Corb s e ri o st rt o sh g enchantin Allotment’. and ‘The Secret gills acked full to the p n fu f o IA P O C It’s a CORBYN-U re!! with Jezza-pleasu

The Editor

TOP SPEED

6MPH (9MPH DOWNHILL)

LENGTH 178CM WIDTH

14 INCHES

PHYSICAL STRENGTH

MEDIUM

STREET CREDABILITY

186

HORROR RATING

2/10

WAR POWER SOCIALIST POWER (WATTS)

98

0001

JEREMY CORBYN Hey Guys and Gals!

FICIAL JEREMY

it – it’s the UNOF Can you believe L 2018?!

CORBYN ANNUA

e Word(search), th is y m re Je e nd th d Inside you will fi ntic Corbyn-base a m ro (a e v Lo f o cal Carol’s Labour r favourite politi u o y ll a f o X FA photostory), DATA , comic strips of a zz Je f o s ic p y m orbyn superstars, drea of Jeremy and C s re tu n e v d A g n mes The Amazi &As, plus fun ga Q s, rd o w ss o cr sps of the Reds, in Game and Wa ra D in ra B ’s n y sks including Corb super-fun JC ma t u b is th ly n o t ally and Ladders. No ell as the magic w s a p e ke d n a t yn’ to cut ou ‘A Christmas Corb s e ri o st rt o sh g enchantin Allotment’. and ‘The Secret gills acked full to the p n fu f o IA P O C It’s a CORBYN-U re!! with Jezza-pleasu

The Editor

TOP SPEED

6MPH (9MPH DOWNHILL)

LENGTH 178CM WIDTH

14 INCHES

PHYSICAL STRENGTH

MEDIUM

STREET CREDABILITY

186

HORROR RATING

2/10

WAR POWER SOCIALIST POWER (WATTS)

98

I GET NERVOUS. I JUST LOVE HIM SO MUC PERHAPS IF I JUST LIST H! EN INSTEAD OF TALKING?

She couldn’t wait to tell Pam…

SORRY? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?

…AND THEN YOU SAID WHAT TO HIM? ARE YOU MAD??

RAISIN BROW… BUMBAG LASER

Carol was secretly annoyed.

And later…

ARE YOU SURE IT’S A DATE? DIDN’T HE SAY IT WAS WORKRELATED?

I KNOW!!

I JUST HOPE I DON’T TALK DRIVEL AGAIN ON OUR DATE IN THE CANTEEN!

…SO, THE THING IS I’VE PREPARED SOME LABOUR PARTY LEAFLETS AND I WAS HOPING TO PUT YOU IN CHARGE OF STAPLING THEM ALL TOGETHER.

JEREMY – I HOPE I’M NOT TOO S… TROUSER PRES !

I MEAN, LATE NO, IT’S L! ALRIGHT, CAROYOU T SIT DOWN. I GO FFEE! AN INSTANT CO

Every girl in the Labour Party HQ fancied Jeremy

, ISN’T HE? HE’S GORGEOUS AT THAT BIG I MEAN… LOOK ARD! BUSHY BE

WHY IS PAM ALWAYS TRYING TO SPOIL MY FUN? OF COURSE IT’S A DATE, SILLY!

T YEAH, PAM, BU T OU HE’D NEVER GO WITH ME…

But then, near a stair

well…

Pam stared at her best friend Carol…

…EVERY TIME I MEET A YOUNG MP I LIKE, I GO TO PIECES AND START TALKING COMPLETE GIBBERISH!

I’M DOING SO WELL! I’VE HARDLY TALKED TWADDLE AT ALL!!

WHAT DO YOU NEED ME TO DO, JEREMY?

YEAH, YOU DO!

MAYBE IT’LL BE DIFFERENT THIS TIME? MAYBE I’LL BE FINE?

…she always seemed to muck things up.

OH, CAROL. COULD WE MEET FOR A QUICK WORK-RELATED CHAT? SAY, IN HALF AN HOUR IN THE CANTEEN?

Jeremy spelled it out to Carol in no uncertain terms

…YEAH, UM, I REALLY NEED SOMEONE DEPENDABLE ON THIS, CAROL. IF THE STAPLES ARE IN THE WRONG PLACE, PEOPLE WON’T BE ABLE TO READ THEM!

OH! JEREMY! BAMBOO LEMON SAUSAGE!

I JUST TOLD YOU, DIDN’T I? I WANT YOU TO STAPLE THESE LEAFLETS TOGETHER. ARE YOU FEELING OKAY, CAROL?

AW! IT’S LOVELY HOW MUCH YOU CARE ABOUT ME!

YOU SEE, THE LABOUR PARTY IS EVERYTHING TO ME. NOTHING ELSE MATTERS APART FROM MY WIFE, CLAUDIA, OF COURSE…

OH, JEREMY, YOU’RE SO FUNNY… AND DISHY!

I GET NERVOUS. I JUST LOVE HIM SO MUC PERHAPS IF I JUST LIST H! EN INSTEAD OF TALKING?

She couldn’t wait to tell Pam…

SORRY? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?

…AND THEN YOU SAID WHAT TO HIM? ARE YOU MAD??

RAISIN BROW… BUMBAG LASER

Carol was secretly annoyed.

And later…

ARE YOU SURE IT’S A DATE? DIDN’T HE SAY IT WAS WORKRELATED?

I KNOW!!

I JUST HOPE I DON’T TALK DRIVEL AGAIN ON OUR DATE IN THE CANTEEN!

…SO, THE THING IS I’VE PREPARED SOME LABOUR PARTY LEAFLETS AND I WAS HOPING TO PUT YOU IN CHARGE OF STAPLING THEM ALL TOGETHER.

JEREMY – I HOPE I’M NOT TOO S… TROUSER PRES !

I MEAN, LATE NO, IT’S L! ALRIGHT, CAROYOU T SIT DOWN. I GO FFEE! AN INSTANT CO

Every girl in the Labour Party HQ fancied Jeremy

, ISN’T HE? HE’S GORGEOUS AT THAT BIG I MEAN… LOOK ARD! BUSHY BE

WHY IS PAM ALWAYS TRYING TO SPOIL MY FUN? OF COURSE IT’S A DATE, SILLY!

T YEAH, PAM, BU T OU HE’D NEVER GO WITH ME…

But then, near a stair

well…

Pam stared at her best friend Carol…

…EVERY TIME I MEET A YOUNG MP I LIKE, I GO TO PIECES AND START TALKING COMPLETE GIBBERISH!

I’M DOING SO WELL! I’VE HARDLY TALKED TWADDLE AT ALL!!

WHAT DO YOU NEED ME TO DO, JEREMY?

YEAH, YOU DO!

MAYBE IT’LL BE DIFFERENT THIS TIME? MAYBE I’LL BE FINE?

…she always seemed to muck things up.

OH, CAROL. COULD WE MEET FOR A QUICK WORK-RELATED CHAT? SAY, IN HALF AN HOUR IN THE CANTEEN?

Jeremy spelled it out to Carol in no uncertain terms

…YEAH, UM, I REALLY NEED SOMEONE DEPENDABLE ON THIS, CAROL. IF THE STAPLES ARE IN THE WRONG PLACE, PEOPLE WON’T BE ABLE TO READ THEM!

OH! JEREMY! BAMBOO LEMON SAUSAGE!

I JUST TOLD YOU, DIDN’T I? I WANT YOU TO STAPLE THESE LEAFLETS TOGETHER. ARE YOU FEELING OKAY, CAROL?

AW! IT’S LOVELY HOW MUCH YOU CARE ABOUT ME!

YOU SEE, THE LABOUR PARTY IS EVERYTHING TO ME. NOTHING ELSE MATTERS APART FROM MY WIFE, CLAUDIA, OF COURSE…

OH, JEREMY, YOU’RE SO FUNNY… AND DISHY!

s ’ y m e r Je ’ t o l p e h t t s o L ‘

member e r ’t n a c y m e r e J plot is! t n e m t o ll a is h where

maze!

heap, avoiding st o p m co is h to k d Help him get bac t to turn the lan an w o h w ts ca t the capitalist fa apartments! ry u x lu d n -e h ig into h

0056

THERESA MAY

TOP SPEED

18MPH (21MPH DOWNHILL)

LENGTH 213CM WIDTH

4 INCHES

PHYSICAL STRENGTH

LOW

STREET CREDABILITY

N/A

HORROR RATING

10/10

WAR POWER SOCIALIST POWER (WATTS)

12

s ’ y m e r Je ’ t o l p e h t t s o L ‘

member e r ’t n a c y m e r e J plot is! t n e m t o ll a is h where

maze!

heap, avoiding st o p m co is h to k d Help him get bac t to turn the lan an w o h w ts ca t the capitalist fa apartments! ry u x lu d n -e h ig into h

0056

THERESA MAY

TOP SPEED

18MPH (21MPH DOWNHILL)

LENGTH 213CM WIDTH

4 INCHES

PHYSICAL STRENGTH

LOW

STREET CREDABILITY

N/A

HORROR RATING

10/10

WAR POWER SOCIALIST POWER (WATTS)

12

5

1

To remove a red wine stain from a blouse use salt and boiling water.

2

When planting seedlin gs, use the handle of yo ur trowel to punch a hole into your (well-aerated) soil.

Use neat laundry detergent for white wine.

3

If you’re struggling to get votes, engage with the disenchanted and un-politicised members of society.

7

4

When drilling into tiles place a plaster onto the tile to stop the drill-bit slipping.

6

Leave vinegar and baking soda in your toilet bowl for 15 minutes to see sparkling results.

9

Attach a magnetic strip to the bottom of your mirror and use it to hold bobby pins, tweezers and beard-trimming scissors.

8

Be sure of any budg etary calculations before announcing manifesto pledges.

Kill weeds on walkw ays with a spray bottle full of vinegar.

10 Ravel sticky tape ar ound your hand to use as a bobb le/fluff collector to smarten up your favourite jersey.

When attempting to become leader of a political party be charismatic and appe aling.

5

1

To remove a red wine stain from a blouse use salt and boiling water.

2

When planting seedlin gs, use the handle of yo ur trowel to punch a hole into your (well-aerated) soil.

Use neat laundry detergent for white wine.

3

If you’re struggling to get votes, engage with the disenchanted and un-politicised members of society.

7

4

When drilling into tiles place a plaster onto the tile to stop the drill-bit slipping.

6

Leave vinegar and baking soda in your toilet bowl for 15 minutes to see sparkling results.

9

Attach a magnetic strip to the bottom of your mirror and use it to hold bobby pins, tweezers and beard-trimming scissors.

8

Be sure of any budg etary calculations before announcing manifesto pledges.

Kill weeds on walkw ays with a spray bottle full of vinegar.

10 Ravel sticky tape ar ound your hand to use as a bobb le/fluff collector to smarten up your favourite jersey.

When attempting to become leader of a political party be charismatic and appe aling.

L 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% 100% UNOFFICIAL UNOFFICIAL 100% 100% UNOFFICIAL UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 10

UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100% UNOFFICIAL 100

N ANNUAL Y B R O C Y M E R JE THE UNOFFICAL E BOXES! R U S A E L -P A Z Z E JE TICKS ALL THOS NER DFULLNESS COR X PERSTAR DATAFA POLITICAL SU MASKS CORBYN FUN HACKS LABOUR LIFE H) E WORD(SEARC JEREMY IS TH STRIP HE REDS COMIC CORBYN OF T Y VE PHOTOSTOR LABOUR OF LO E AIN DRAIN GAM CORBYN’S BR STORIES ENCHANTING A PICS DREAMY JEZZ CROSSWORD

                        Q&A   JC FASHION TIPS Y   MAZES TURES OF JEREM N V E D A G IN Z A   THE AM LADDERS   WASPS AND   JAM E JEREMY E E BEARD ON TH H T IN P THE DIFFERENC   T O P S T O -D O T ME IN DOT  FUN COLOURLA AME AND DDERS G S P S A W   RBYN   A CHRISTMAFSYCO EAR ALS O ESTERY U N N A   AND MORE!!  ORE,  M

, E R   O M   CORBYN’S KIN

CORBYN FUN MASKS! CORBYN CROSSWORD! CORBYN STORIES! CORBYN PICS! CORBYN MAZES! Q&A! JAM! BENN! MARX!