October Her: Breast Cancer Edition

Page 14

Remembering the life of

Brandy Edwards Duke 1975-2022
3615 SMemorial Drive, Greenville •Main: 252-321-3000 www.greenvilletoyota.com FREE Come Shop Our Inventory Of New &Certified Used Vehicles IT’S AS EASY AS RESERVE &RIDE, TRADE,ORSELL Her Magazine — October 20222

Meet our team

Christina Ruotolo is the editor of Her Magazine, Hot Dish writer, and a multi-media specialist at The Daily Reflector. She is also a part-time bookseller at Barnes & Noble, directs and officiates weddings, and teaches creative writing at Pitt Community College. Christina enjoys baking, puppy snuggles and spending time with her boyfriend, Craig.

Jasmine Blount-Coward is a graphic designer and owner of Jas-Creates Graphics & Web. She enjoys spending time with family, her husband, Dom and two sons, Dash and Jett.

Geri Simpkins is a Greenville, N.C. native, wife, mother to three grown boys, and child of God. She’s been shooting professionally for about 15 years. She photographs weddings, events, families, seniors and school photos for several schools and preschools in Pitt County and beyond. Nothing makes her happier than capturing that special moment for her clients who have also become friends. You can find our more at her website, www.gerisimpkinsphotography.com.

Martha Brown is a board certified chaplain and interpersonal communication instructor. She has served in various governmental and private institutions. In 2021, Brown was a recipient of the NC Governor's Award for Excellence in the category of Human Relations. Nicknamed by a coworker, Chaplain Extra, Brown plays as hard as she works. When not living up to her nickname, she enjoys spending time with family and friends, traveling (by plane, train, automobile or ship), reading, and laughing

Christy Jones, also know as Coach Chris, is an improvement coach for leaders. She helps them break free from feeling overwhelmed and prepares them to take their teams to high levels of performance. Contact her at www. beginmonday.com.

Angie Watson, RDN, LDN, CDCES is a Registered Dietitian working in the Diabetes Self-Management Program at the Pitt County Public Health Department. She has over 11 years of experience working solely with diabetes clients, and nine years of experience as a Certified Diabetes Care and Education Specialist (CDCES). Angie is married with a seven year-old daughter, and likes to spend her free time outdoors.

Dear Friends,

Nine years ago, my mom died at the age of 64 from a rare uterine cancer that at the time only about eight people in the world had. The doctors had never seen her cancer before and were not sure how to treat it. She was given four months to live. I can’t imagine what went through her mind when the doctor said the word “terminal.” What I would later find out, is my mom never heard those words. She chose to fight, and not to let cancer win. After four months of chemo, sickness, and a lot of trips to the hospital, the doctors told her the chemo had worked. Almost all of her cancer was gone. This was the day my mother had prayed for. It was also the day the doctors and I told her she was terminal, that just because it went away, it didn’t mean it was over. She said she had no idea she had been terminal. We cried together, but we came up with a plan. She would keep fighting and even if cancer won, I would promise to keep living. Six months later, she died. She didn’t lose her battle with cancer, she won a trip to the most amazing place on earth, heaven. She believed in a God that would take her home, to comfort her, and to restore her to health. And I know she’s happy, she’s with my four children and dad and that my job is to stay here and do my best to keep living. I am no longer afraid of death. I know when my time comes, God will open his arms to me and welcome me home.

Fast forward to earlier this summer when I asked Brandy Duke, a stage four metastatic breast cancer patient living in Greenville if she would be our cover model for our breast cancer issue. She was so grateful and excited for the opportunity to share her cancer journey “God is writing my story” with readers and those who had followed her journey on Facebook. She bought a new dress and was gearing up for our photo-shoot. A few days before her birthday in August, she informed me she was having a procedure and would be home within a week just in time for her pictures. We never had the opportunity to meet as she died just a few days later at the age of 47. I asked her husband if we could continue to share her journey with Her, that even though she had died, in the pages of Her, she lives, she fights, and her honest and courageous words of comfort will help others find peace with their diagnosis. Her story is like so many. This year alone, The World Health Organization estimates that 43,250 women and 530 men will die of breast cancer. This breaks down to one in eight women dying. It’s a somber fact, but one we have to face head on. We must celebrate the victories, remember losses and showcase the amazing medical staff who do everything in their power to change these odds. No matter what happens in the lives of cancer patients whether they live or die, just know their story does not end, it’s the beginning of something more beautiful, a new chapter. Their memory will live on in the people that loved them, helped them fight and will continue to do so after they’re gone. Thank you Brandy for letting us share your story.

Christina

Christina Ruotolo | Editor | 329-9532

Craig Springer | Advertising | 329-9632

Jasmine Blount | Designer | 258-3035 cruotolo@apgenc.com

Cover Story

4-7 Remembering Brandy Edwards Duke

Inside

8 Her Health: Cancer and Nutrition: Her Recipe: Super Tomato Soup Her Spotlight: Jamie Williams Her Advice: Give It Your AlL Medical Spotlight: Heather White, MD Her Spotlight: Mandy Messerli Her Remembers Lindsey Forde-Smith Her Crosswords Her Word Search

20 Washington Business Spotlight: River Walk Gallery

21 Medical Spotlight: Katie Brown Davis RT(R)(M)(BS)

23 Medical Spotlight: Juliana Ballestero, MD

24 Greenville Business Spotlight: McCabe's Costumes

25-26 Celebrating Spiritual Care Week

27 Her Spotlight: Sonya Hall

28 Her Success: Lisa C. Allen

30 Her Spotlight: Paula Loftin

Meet Her 32-35 Brandy Duke’s Life in Pictures

Christina Ruotolo Editor Christy Jones Contributor Jasmine Blount-Coward Designer Geri Simpkins Photographer Martha Brown Contributor Angie Waston Contributor
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Her Magazine — October 2022 3

Remembering the life of Brandy Edwards Duke

God is writing my story

Sometimes, the most beautiful stories start at the end, not the beginning. The journey after we die, our next chapter is the one with the most light and the most promise. One such beautiful light is Bran dy Edwards Duke who lost her battle to breast can cer on Sunday, August 21, 2022 with her loving family by her side. For Brandy the whole time she was fighting, God has been writing her story, an escape from her pain, an eternal salvation, and a new heavenly life where her health is finally restored.

Throughout Brandy’s courageous five-year battle with met astatic breast cancer, there were moments of defeat and also great victories. In all of this, Brandy knew that God was the true author of her life’s story and that He would write a magnificent and victorious chapter regardless of the earthly outcome. She also knew that God would use her story to encourage and give hope to others who may be facing the same obstacles.

Brandy began chronicling her breast cancer journey “God is writing my story” on Facebook allowing her friends and family

1975-2022
Her Magazine — October 20224

to be part of her story. She shared all the painful and hope ful moments from first diagnosis to her final beautiful earthly breaths that lifted her from an earthly mission and planted her soul into a new heavenly mission to be remembered for her bravery, devotion to the Lord, her family, friends and those bat tling the same disease. Brandy was a daughter, a sister, a wife, a mother, a friend to so many, and brave breast cancer warrior.

A native and lifelong resident of Pitt County, Brandy was born to Timothy and Brenda Carol Stocks Edwards. She was a gradu ate of D. H. Conley High School and a two-time graduate of East Carolina University for both her undergraduate and graduate degrees. Brandy attended First Pentecostal Holiness Church, where she met her now husband, Michael Duke when he was 17 and she was 19. They fell in love, dated for five years, and married in March, 2000. They began married life and had two sons, Zachary and Braden. Brandy worked as a sales repre sentative for a number of years in pharmaceuticals as well as medical equipment. Later, she worked as a patient liaison for patients who utilized rehabilitation services.

Brandy and Michael had been married over 22 years at the time of her death. Micheal remembers when they first met and recalls all of the wonderful things he loved about her. “I remem ber she stood out to me not only because of her beauty, but her personality. She was energetic and I loved that we shared the same religious views,” Michael says.

Life went on like so many other family stories do. In 2012 Brandy’s sister, Michelle was diagnosed with breast cancer. She helped her through her own cancer battle, a double mastecto my and has been cancer free since 2013. Brandy did not know she would hear the same words, “You have breast cancer,” just a few years later in August 2017 when she was first diagnosed with cancer. She also had a double mastectomy and went into remission. Two years later, in August 2019, the cancer returned, but Brandy vowed that she would fight, that “no matter what happens, this is my promise to Y'ALL and all of my people …. that I am going to FIGHT as long as I have breath. And tell my story! Bran dy Duke doesn’t quit and walk away, and I usually always have to have the last word!” In true warrior-like spirit along with her faith, family and friends rallied around her, she would go into battle again with her head held high.

In October 2019 Brandy started chemotherapy. She endured 16 chemotherapy treatments and 33 rounds of radiation. Bran dy was declared cancer free in June, 2020. But just a few months later in September, 2020 her cancer returned and had spread to her pelvic bone, lower back bone, and liver. She wanted her life to be measured in beautiful faithful moments, although it was surrounded by needles, pain, and fear of the unknown. She used her “God is writing my story” Facebook journey to show everyone all the beautiful and ugly sides of cancer. When she was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer, she posted on her feed about loving your story no matter what it’s made of. “Do you Love Your Story? That’s a hard question to answer…. at least for me it can be. Of course when life is going good, we LOVE our story. I mean who wouldn’t? But it’s when LIFE gets tough and hard and confusing and all the other ‘bad’ things … that’s when it’s hard to Love Our Story. One thing that cancer has taught me, is to do just this. Love My Story. And trust me, some days are easier to love than others. But when I truly rely on the fact that it’s not My Sto ry, but the Story that God is writing through ME, how can I not love it? So whatever your story is, try to love it in the good times and the

bad. I promise you that when you have this mindset, your days will be brighter and you will have so much Joy! I get excited just thinking about it!”

Not only did Brandy seek comfort in her faith and family, but she had a tribe of friends who helped her through her cancer journey, Denise, Dawn, and Jessica. She wanted everyone to know how important her tribe was, a stable guiding light in the darkness that helped her see through the pain and sadness, and see beyond the word cancer. They texted everyday, had “TRIBE time”, went on trips together, and prayed together. Bran dy always had a lot to say about her tribe. “Living with cancer, I have often told people that I am living my best life through cancer. And I know that sounds weird, but it’s true. My cancer brought me my TRIBE. We were all friends separately before, but cancer brought us together.”

Brandy said many times that fighting cancer is a battle that is an equally physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual battle. But we are not called to fight these battles alone. She loved her village of supporters and leaned on her church family as well and let it be known how grateful she was for their help."They pray for me, pray over me, step in to be anointed on my behalf, speak words of encouragement over me, help hold my arms up at the altar when I want to praise Jesus, but don’t have the strength to do so. The children take time to write me notes, make me a blanket that I use EVERY SINGLE DAY. Y’all these are my people and they are not just standing behind me, but they are beside me, and in some cases in front of me! I hands down COULD NOT fight cancer without my church family.”

After her first round of chemo in October, 2021, Brandy post ed the reality of what she was going through and her fears of losing her hair. “I have done well with my first chemo treatment.

My side effects have been very little...So I’ll take it! I have been told that I can expect to lose my hair starting this week. As vain as it may sound, losing my hair is what I dread the most. My emotions are all over the place. As much as I may joke about rocking a bald head, THIS hurts deep for me. My husband wiped my tears last night as I laid in bed and cried. The anticipation is rough, BUT I know who holds my future and that He will be with me every step of the way. And so I will shed some tears this week and will probably get mad, but I WILL get up, put my big girl pants on, and WILL rock a bald head.”

In May, 2022, after rounds of grueling chemo, she continued to share the beauty and the pain reminding people that God is in charge in her life and continuing to write her story. “I had Chemo # … I don’t even know, I’ve had so many I’ve lost count. But it’s not all rainbows and unicorns over here. FEAR creeps in! And it’s REAL. Fear is of the devil, but we all experience it and sometimes all we need is a subtle reminder that MY GOD IS BIGGER THAN MY FEAR!"

Micheal was an anchor through the many storms he and Brandy weathered as her cancer progressed. In early 2022, doctors found 40 brain lesions and she had to have additional radiation. Her pain was great, but she did her best to put on a brave face when in public. “At home, she was more human. We cried together, held each other, had log talks and we were realis tic about her disease, but still hopeful we would have more time. We prayed together and tried to give our boys as normal a life as we could through it all. No matter how much pain she was in, she didn’t complain. Her faith was that strong,” Michael says. One of Brandy’s posts in 2021 talked about how important time with Michael was. “My husband and I are closer. We make more of a conscious effort to just be with each other. It could be something as simple as binge watching a series with him (which we do every night). Just being in each other’s presence is important.”

Brandy enjoyed more quality family time with Micheal and her boys by sitting at the dinner table every night talking and creating cherished memories her boys can keep with them. “Her boys were her life, and her greatest joy. She was an incredible wife and an amazing mother,” Michael says. The family also va cationed as much as they could those last few years of Brandy’s life. They went to Outer Banks, Key West, Myrtle Beach and so many other great places. Brandy even made a bucket list and one was meeting the singers of New Kids on the Block this past Spring. Michael is grateful they had those last few trips and memories together. “We lived for the moment. Brandy was always so organized and made sure all our trips were a success.”

Five days before Brandy died on August 16, 2022 she made this post. “Some men promise their “Love” a rose garden. Not mine. He promised to be there for me in sickness & in health. And boy has he delivered this over and over again. This is not how I planned to spend my birthday week either... in the hospital. But here we are!”

Within a few days, Micheal was told there was no more they could do, that she was comfortable and she would die soon. The family gathered by her bedside, prayed over her and on Au gust 21, 2022 at age 47, she passed from her earthly story into her heavenly one. Micheal shared a heartfelt message on her Facebook page a short time later. “Some may or may not know but my beautiful wife reached the next chapter in her story. We aren’t ready for this but she was. She is finally free of so much pain in her body that she dealt with daily. God gave us the last five years together (to the week) to experience life together with our boys. We

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lived, laughed and took a break on occasion. Not sure what the next chapter looks like for us, but so grateful she has reached the finish line with her big daddy Jesus!”

The outpouring of love, support and condolences were in the thousands as Brandy’s journey had touched so many people’s lives. Brandy will be best remembered for her tremendous faith in God. Even in the face of recurring illness, she strongly be lieved in her “Big Daddy Jesus” and how He was writing her story. Brandy was an incredible mother who adored her two boys and supported them in all their endeavors. Traveling was one of her favorite things to do with family and friends. The family’s two golden retrievers, Dixie and Lulu, and their cat, Tiger, brought her much joy. Her immediate and extended families were very important to her and she especially enjoyed “sister shenani gans” with her sister, Michelle who she grew even closer with as she battled cancer.

Brandy was preceded in death by her loving father-in-law, Ju nior Phillips who was a spiritual guide and prayer warrior in her life. She is survived by her husband of 22 years, Michael Corey Duke; two sons, Zachary and Braden Duke; her parents, Tim and Brenda Edwards; one sister, Michelle Edwards; her motherin-law, Barbara Phillips; a brother-in-law, Matt Duke and wife, Christy; two nieces Emma and Chloe Duke and a nephew, Luke Duke. Brandy’s story is not over, not in the least. Her memory will live on in her family, her words that teach us to love our sto ry no matter how short or long it is, and that it should be lived with purpose, faith and focus. “Make lemonade out of lemons. Look at the glass half full instead of half empty. LIVE in the PRES ENT!! And take the dag-gum trip that you’ve been putting off and MAKE THOSE MEMORIES!! Because they are oh so precious…Don’t

Her Magazine — October 2022 7

CANCER AND NUTRITION: Sorting Myth from Fact

It is estimated that at least 18% of all cancers and about 16% of cancer deaths in the US are related to excess body weight, physical inactivity, alcohol consumption and/or poor nutrition. However, some popular information related to lifestyle recommendations and cancer may be misleading.

Myth 1: Being overweight or obese increases my risk of heart disease and diabetes, but not cancer.

Fact 1: Being overweight or obese is clearly linked with several types of cancer including breast, colon and rectal, endometrial, esophagus, kidney, liver, ovarian, pancreas, stomach, thyroid and more.

Myth 2: A vegetarian or vegan diet is the best way to prevent cancer.

Fact 2: While vegetarian and vegan diets can be beneficial for cancer prevention, these health benefits are based on whole plant foods (vegetables, fruit, whole grains, legumes, nuts and seeds), healthy protein sources (legumes, fish and/or poultry, limited processed and red meats) and unsaturated fats (healthy oils, avocado, nuts and seeds). To reap the benefit of a plantbased diet, it must also be low in added sugar, saturated and/ or trans fats and excess calories. For example, a meal of extra cheesy pizza, soda, and a candy bar could classify as vegetarian, but it may be detrimental to health.

Myth 3: There is a highly specialized diet to follow for cancer prevention.

Fact 3: For cancer risk reduction, the American Cancer Society (ACS) recommends following the US Dietary guidelines, which includes consuming 2.5 to three cups of vegetables and 1.5 to two cups of fruit daily, making half your grains whole, and limiting added sugars and saturated fat.

Myth 4: I don’t always eat right, so taking supplements is a good way to get the specific nutrients I need to prevent cancer.

Fact 4: Supplements generally don’t have the same effect as ingesting a particular nutrient in the form of food. Let’s look at some examples:

◊ Antioxidants: Antioxidant vitamins such as beta-carotene, Vitamin A, and Vitamin E have been linked to decreased cancer risk. However, the effect is found only when consumed in foods. Additionally, some studies have found that high-dose supplements of beta-carotene, vitamin A, and Vitamin E can actually increase risk of certain cancers.

◊ Fiber: According to the ACS, fiber likely reduces risk of colorectal cancer. However, studies of fiber supplements have not found that they reduce polyps in the colon, so the ACS recommends getting fiber through whole plant foods.

◊ Fruits and Vegetables: Many different types of compounds are found in fruits and vegetables that researchers suspect work together to have healthful effects. These compounds are unlikely to be found in dietary supplements.

Myth 5: Drinking one glass of red wine daily lowers my cancer risk.

Fact 5: Although red wine contains antioxidants, the ACS warns it is best not to drink alcohol. Alcohol is the third most important preventable risk factor for cancer, after tobacco use and excess weight.

Bottom line: Eat whole foods including plenty of fruits, vegetables, and whole grains while limiting or avoiding added sugar, saturated fat, alcohol, and processed foods. For more information on cancer prevention visit www.cancer.org.

Angie Watson, RDN, LDN, CDCES is a Registered Dietitian working in the Diabetes Self-Management Program at the Pitt County Public Health Department. Angie graduated with a Bachelor of Science in Applied Human Nutrition (BScAHN) from Mount Saint Vincent University in Canada in 2003. Since that time, she has been living and working as a dietitian in North Carolina. She has over 11 years of experience working solely with diabetes clients, and nine years of experience as a Certified Diabetes Care and Education Specialist (CDCES). Angie is married with a seven year-old daughter, and likes to spend her free time outdoors.

HEALTH
Her Magazine — October 20228

SUPER TOMATO SOUP

Here is a quick and delicious way to add a serving of vegetables to your day. Don’t try this without the sun-dried tomatoes, they are the secret to this soup.

Serves 6 | Serving Size: 1 cup | Prep Time: 15 minutes

| Cook Time: 1 hour 10 minutes | Total Time: 1 hour 25 minutes

NUTRITION PER SERVING: Serving Size: 1 cup | Vegetables: 3⁄4 cup | Fruits: 0 cups | Calories: 76 calories | Carbohydrates: 11 grams | Fiber: 4 grams | Protein: 3 grams | Fat: 3 grams | Sodium: 115 mg

INGREDIENTS:

1 tablespoon olive oil

1 cup chopped onion (approximately 1 medium onion)

3⁄4 cup shredded carrot (approximately 2-3 carrots)

2 tablespoons minced garlic (approximately 3-4 garlic cloves)

1 teaspoon sugar

1⁄4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

1⁄8 teaspoon salt

10 large basil leaves, divided

3 sun-dried tomato halves packed in oil with herbs (such as California Sun Dry brand), drained

2 (14.5-ounce) cans low-sodium or salt-free diced tomatoes, undrained 1 (14-ounce) can fat-free, less-sodium chicken broth

DIRECTIONS:

1. Put olive oil in a large saucepan over medium heat.

2. Add chopped onion, shredded carrot, and garlic to pan. Cook for 5 minutes or until vegetables are tender, stirring frequently.

3. Add sugar, pepper, salt, and 4 basil leaves. Cook for 5 minutes.

4. Add sun-dried tomatoes, diced tomatoes, and broth. Bring to a boil.

5. Reduce heat and simmer for 1 hour.

6. Remove from heat.

7. Puree the soup using a hand-held (wand) blender or traditional blender. If using a hand-held (wand) blender, emerge the wand in the soup while still in the saucepan and blend until smooth. If using a traditional blender, place half of the soup in the blender. Remove center piece of blender lid (to allow steam to escape); secure blender lid on blender. Place a clean towel over opening in blender lid (to avoid splatters). Blend until smooth. Pour into a large bowl.

8. Repeat procedure with remaining soup.

9. Divide soup evenly among 6 bowls. Garnish each serving with 1 basil leaf.

RECIPE
INFORMATION
Her Magazine — October 2022 9

JAMIE WILLIAMS

How old were you when you found out you had breast cancer? I was 33 years-old with an almost three year-old son. It was May and we had just returned from a family vacation at Holden Beach.

How did you find your cancer? I wish I could say that I was doing routine self-breast exams, but I wasn’t. I just happened to feel something on the side of my breast when changing one afternoon. I made an appointment with my OBGYN who sent me for a mammogram and ultrasound that was followed by a biopsy. I remember everything about that day, even what I was wearing. It was a Thursday morning; the PA was inches from my face when she shared the news with me and my husband. My immediate thought was whether I would be alive to see my son grow up.

What stage and type of breast cancer did you have? I was diagnosed with Stage 3 Invasive Ductal Carcinoma that was HER2 and estrogen positive. I had a 6 cm tumor (about the size of a golf ball) in my breast and positive lymph node involvement.

What treatments did you have and how long did that take? I completed six rounds of chemotherapy, followed by a lumpectomy, then radiation; this first line of treatment took seven months. Since I was in my thirties and was diagnosed with an aggressive form of cancer, I wanted to take the most aggressive approach possible with my treatment. So, once I completed my initial treatment, I underwent a hysterectomy and after my body healed from radiation, a double mastectomy. Because I had hormone positive breast cancer, I will take an aromatase inhibitor for a total of ten years to reduce my chances of a reoccurrence.

How long have you been cancer free? I celebrated ten years this past May.

How has cancer changed your life? Cancer is just one part of my story but since my diagnosis, it has shaped every other part of it. When I was in the middle of treatment, life was tough. Now, there are some days I forget I even had cancer only to have others where the anxiety of a reoccurrence can be overwhelming. My body is a constant reminder of my diagnosis, I will forever carry the scars from surgery, and I experience long-term side effects from treatment. My diagnosis changed my outlook on life. I cherish the small moments not just the big ones, I try not to rush through life, taking time to be with those that matter most and doing things that I enjoy, and being grateful for the life I have.

What advice would you give to others who may be dealing with their own cancer journey? Everyone’s journey is different, what is helpful to one person may not be for another, but I would encourage others to ask for and accept help, find your people and build a support network, rest when needed and set boundaries to maintain your mental and physical health, be kind to yourself, and be your own healthcare advocate.

Did you have any books, quotes, or routines that helped you through your cancer journey? One quote that resonated with me during my journey and still does today, is from Elizabeth Edwards, “She stood in the storm, and when the wind did not blow her way, she adjusted her sails.”

SPOTLIGHT Her Magazine — October 202210
Ahome is not ahome because of it’sroom sions or the color of the walls. It’sabout howyou hen you walk though the door and can instantly ion your life unfolding there. It’smorethan real state. It’sabout your life and your dreams. Lor iStancill REALTOR® #1 Sales Team At Keller Williams Points East Since2015 Cell: (252) 347-9205 1708 E. Arlington Blvd., Greenville,NC27858 haron Alexander, REAL est of Greenville-Best Realtor HOMEATLAST 3 lifyfeelings of peace, pleasure andr la ation at the co urney. It’s theplace youwanttobe. Whetheryou’re a propertyow e r propertyseeker, we findreal s our real estate needs Office:252.371.17 ~ ar HomeAtLast C om 3011 SMemoria e #4, Greenville, NC 4 Easter nNor th Carolina Real Estate Ser vice Director y CSSS, GREEN, SRES Multi-million Dollar Producer Former WBCBR Realtor® of the Year Coldwell Banker Sterling, Diamond and President’sCircle Diane Edwards mobile: (252) 945-0981 Kari Paramore REALTOR® DIRECT-252.917.4906 OFFICE- 252.355.6000 Ext. 2143 KariParamore@kw.com KariParamore kw com Keller Williams 1708 East Arlington Blvd., Greenville, NC 27858 Each Office Is Independently Owned and Operated. Her Magazine — October 2022 11

G IVE IT YOUR ALL

Well ladies, it is October, and we are almost coming to a close of the last quarter of the year. Normally during this time, I take time to sit down, reflect on the past year, and put my thoughts toward the forecast for the next year. As I sat to reflect upon this year, my thoughts could not help but to circle around the fact that this life is filled with ups and downs. I think about how life really is like a “vapor” in many ways, and it is utterly important to focus on what is truly important because our days on this earth are numbered. I must tell you; I do not feel sad about this reality—in fact, this sobering reality makes me strategize and think of ways to maximize the time that I have on this side so that when the close of life does come, I know that I have given it my all.

For our time together, I want to encourage you with this message: GIVE IT YOUR ALL!

It is breast cancer awareness month and there are quite a few alarming statistics of people who are either being diagnosed with the disease and those whose lives have come to a close due to the complications of the disease. It is a deadly disease, and it is incumbent upon us to make sure that we are doing what we need to do routinely (breast exams—self checks and mammograms, etc.) so that if we are impacted by it, we can experience early detection if possible. I have lost some very close loved ones to breast cancer and it has not been an easy road to travel. However, it has taught me to posture myself to give it (life) my all.

You know, there are quite a few of us who grapple with going after what is in our hearts to do and to live our lives to the fullest. Daily, I am learning that if I am going to experience the fullness of life that I dream about and desire, I must consciously give it my all right NOW. I cannot wait for the perfect set of circumstances because “waiting” could cause me to miss out. I have spent a lot of time “talking about” what I want to do in life, “talking about where I want to go” in life, “talking about who I want to spend time with” and never fully giving it my all—life is NOT designed to be lived that way. You and I have a real responsibility to explore our passions, pursue our dreams, and posture ourselves for what is in our hearts so that we live without regrets. We are to give life our all!

If you are going to give life your all, you need a few things:

1. A VISION: you must see something that is bigger than where you are right now, that can motivate you and keep you inspired! You need a vision that can push you past the dark moments in life. A vision gives you hope and a desire to pour out when you feel as though life is “punching you”. A vision is critical if you are going to give life your all!

2. GOOD COMPANY: you need good people around you! One of my brothers, Pastor Trev Evans (Koinonia Christian Center) makes this statement all the time, “We were not made to do life alone.” People help to make life bearable, and the right people help to make life great! It is important for you and me to have people that can not only tolerate us, we need people that can

Her Magazine — October 202212

celebrate us! We need people that can help us to see the greatness within us and help us to bring it out at the same time. We need people to do life with. We need good company.

3. GRACE: listen, you are going to do dumb stuff, you are going to choose incorrectly, you are going to eat stuff you shouldn’t—give yourself grace! I am not telling you to just “live any kind of way with no remorse”—I am just saying, give yourself a break from time to time—especially in the hard times. Sometimes, we just need to look in the mirror and say, “You know what? No, I didn’t make the mark—oh well, I am getting back on track today!” We must be kind to ourselves because sometimes life is cruel to us.

I could go on and on, but I feel I need to stop there for now. I just wanted to take a moment to encourage you to give life your all. Stop allowing your dreams to sit on the shelf, stop pouring into everyone else around you and neglecting your own dreams—go after what is in YOUR heart and give it your all! Your life is precious. Your time on this side is limited. Whatever you are going to do—you better go ahead and get moving on it, because you do not know how much time you have left to get it all done. Know that I am here, rooting for you, cheering you on—go forth and GIVE IT YOUR ALL! Until next time, this is your friend and personal coach, Coach Chris.

Christy Jones, also known as Coach Chris, is an improvement coach for leaders and helps them break free from feeling overwhelmed and prepares them to take their teams to high levels of performance. Contact her at www.beginmonday.com.

Kelley Have n, MD,FACOG;Paige Fish er,M D, FACO G; Esth er Smith ,M D, FACO G; Steven Sp ruill ,M D, FACO G; William Brown, MD,FACOG;S arah Sears, CN M; Cierra Rowe ,AGNP Acce pt ing patient s. Ca ll fo ra na ppointm ent. greenvillewc.com| 252.757.3131 No matter yo ur st ag eoflife, yo u’ll re ceivec areinapra cticethatm eets yo ur nee ds andexp ec tations We of fe ra co mplete ra ng eof obstetrica nd gyn ecologic se rvices from ad ole scencethrough adulthood TrustedC are forWomen Through AllLife St ages 633 Red Banks Rd. •Arlington Village Robinsonjewelers.com •252-321-7000 Since1969 jewelers Her Magazine — October 2022 13

Heather White, MD Medical Oncologist, Physicians East, Greenville, NC

How long have you worked as a medical oncologist with Physicians East? I joined the practice in 2003 after finishing my Internal medicine residency and Medical oncology fellowship at Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond Virginia. I am board-certified in medical oncology. I received my medical degree from the Brody School of Medicine East Carolina University, and my undergraduate degree at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. I am an eastern North Carolina native, growing up in Rocky Mount. After completing my fellowship, returning to Greenville for my career was like returning home.

What made you choose breast oncology for your concentration? When I first joined my practice in 2003, I was the only female oncologist in the group. I would say I was called to breast oncology more than I chose it necessarily. At a very young age I prayed that the Lord would put me exactly where I could be used best as a physician, and He called me into breast oncology in the very beginning of my career. My patients are a blessing. Being the only female oncologist in the early years of my new career, it always felt like a natural fit. I have always felt a deep and meaningful connection with my patients and I love what I do.

Tell us about your family. I have been married to my husband for almost 16 years now and together we have a large family. I have one son who is 20 years-old. I have three stepchildren and six grandchildren. My family is the love of my life, and they have always been incredibly supportive of my very demanding career.

What advancements would you like to see come in the future for breast cancer patients? Undoubtedly I would love to see breast cancer go away. There have been many advancements with treatment including now immunotherapy in addition to chemotherapy and many surgical and radiation advances. Treatment is far less toxic than it used to be, but we still have a long way to go. Early detection and genetic testing have been groundbreaking in screening for cancer risk and early small cancers that are more easily curable.

MEDICAL SPOTLIGHT
1029 Old Creek Road, GREENVILLE, NC www.Attends.com We design, manufacture, market and distribute awidevariety of everyday personal care products to baby diapers. Our Products Make Lives Better Her Magazine — October 202214

MANDY MESSERLI

How old were you when you found out you had breast cancer? 36 years-old

How did you find your cancer? I hadn’t been feeling the greatest and was doing a self-breast exam. I found a lump but didn’t think much of it and informed my OBGYN when I went in for my annual exam. They also noticed the lump and scheduled me to have a mammogram and a biopsy a couple weeks later. I knew immediately after having my mammogram that I had cancer. There was something about the way the technician said you should see a doctor for a second opinion that gave it away.

What stage and type of breast cancer did you have? I was diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer, which is the most aggressive type of breast cancer, and was considered stage 2.

What treatments did you have and how long did that take? In May 2017, I started chemotherapy. I had four rounds of what they call the Red Devil, Adriamycin, chemotherapy administered every two weeks. I had to skip one week because my blood count was too low. I then had 12 sessions of Taxol which were administered every week. Next on my to do list was 33 sessions of radiation; 28 of those sessions were normal and five of those sessions were with a booster. Radiation was tough on my skin, and I did have some burning. The next course of treatment was to have a double mastectomy which I advocated for since there was a history of breast cancer in my family. About a year later, in December 2018, I had my expanders put in and went through the painful process of expanding my skin. In April 2019, I had reconstructive surgery where my implants were placed.

How long have you been cancer free? It depends on which date you use. Some people use the date of diagnosis, and some people use their surgery date! I use my surgery date so this October will be five years and a special one since I can say I am now in remission.

How has cancer changed your life? Cancer has made me a better advocate for myself, my body and my family. It allowed me to look deep into my life and I have unapologetically made significant changes. I’m grateful to be here and want people with that same energy to share life with me.

What advice would you give to others who may be dealing with their own cancer journey? Know that everyone who fights cancer will have a different story than you. If they responded to a medication a certain way, it doesn’t mean you will respond the same way. And that is okay because everyone is different. It’s totally okay to ask for help and to say no to things. You need time to rest and for recovery. Some people might say it is selfish, but honestly it is survival and that is what is most important!

Did you have any books, quotes, or routines that helped you through your cancer journey? For me keeping up with a constant routine with work was important. I would work Monday – Thursday and Fridays would be “Chemo Friday!'' This allowed me to stay on a schedule and a routine that was consistent, but it also allowed me to have the weekend to rest and recover before going back to work. I also used my treatment plan like a checklist. I’m a checklist kind of person and that helped me to be able to reach a goal one treatment at a time. I didn’t feel like doing a lot of reading during treatment, but I found a lot of great motivation in music. Some of my favorite songs were, and still are, Overcomer by Mandisa, Old Church Choir by Zack Williams and Fight Song by Rachel Platten.

SURVIVOR SPOTLIGHT
Her Magazine — October 2022 15

Lindsey Jane Forde-Smith Remembers

Lindsey Jane Forde-Smith, 59, passed away with strength and grace on Tuesday, July 21, 2021 after a courageous battle with invasive ductile carcinoma breast cancer. In her 11-year cancer fight, Lindsey rallied a wide circle of friends, physicians, nurses and fellow survivors stretching across eastern North Carolina and beyond. Treated at both Duke and Vidant, Lindsey would go on to help build our local Cancer Center by sharing her story with contagious cheer and offering guidance and resources to support patients, providers and planners. This commitment to service was in keeping with her long career in education, most notably at E.B. Aycock. Her family and circle remember her as a champion of several causes and community members in need.

She loved dogs, beach music, time spent on Ocracoke, a good book and Tar Heel basketball. She leaves behind her husband and rock, Marty, and two girls, Nana and Cait, and is survived by her parents, Richard and Sharon, and sisters, Lesley and Lainey, as well as beloved

brothers in-law, sisters in-law, nieces and nephews. Her best friend, Ashley Miller says she was ALWAYS positive and had the best attitude of anyone she’s ever known with cancer. “She helped with so many other projects in the community other than breast cancer. She assisted me with The Ronald McDonald House, getting t-shirts and socks to people who had been through natural disasters, back to school drives, warm clothing for children, etc. through Kiwanis. She always was helping others! She and I lived to buy handbags together and made sure no one wore white or linen after Labor Day. She is missed my many many people.”

Lindsey was devoted to her daughters and took pride in supporting fellow cancer patients at Vidant.

Contributions in her memory can be made to ‘Lainey Bradley-LFS Legacy Fund’, 505 Lakeland Plaza #211, Cumming, GA 30040 or to Vidant Health Foundation, PO Box 8489, Greenville, NC 27835-848 and designate for cancer care.

Her Magazine — October 202216
Our Cosmetic division in Greenville latest advances in beauty,dermatology and laser technology No referrals are required for any of our cosmetic procedures. To learn more about our ser vices please visit our website or call for an appointment today! Cosmetic Dermatolog Aldridge & Southerland Realtors 226 Commerce Street Greenville, NC 27858 252-341-9969 CONNIE MOORE COREY C2EX, GRI, SLS Not only is CONNIE MOORE COREY a successful Realtor... she is a Cancer Survivor! 252-756-3500 For all listing please visit our website! www.aldridgeandsoutherland.com Agents on Duty s ORDER OF THE LONGLEAF PINE 2020 COASTAL PLAINS REALTOR OF THE YEAR 2020 NCR OUTSTANDING SERVICE AWARD NAR RPAC HALL OF FAME Her Magazine — October 2022 17

Breast Cancer Awareness 15

Across

3. The color of the ribbon worn to show awareness for breast cancer in men

5. Our Take Care Champ dressed as this for our Pink Costume Contest

7. An estimated _____ percent of breast cancer develops in men

8 What we are all working towards

9 Who recently raised over $500 toward Breast Cancer Research?

10 What month is National Breast Cancer Awareness month?

11 What is the medical exam done to detect breast cancer?

12 Iconic "Come on down!" announcer for the Price is Right and brave fighter to breast cancer

13. Male Breast Cancer Awareness week happens every week in October

15 U S Marine and famous talk show host diagnosed by breast cancer

Down

1. Two colors in one ribbon to recognize breast cancer in both men and women

2. Men's Breast Cancer Awareness group

4. Actor, portrayd character 'Shaft', diagnosed in 1993

6. This breast cancer survivor and KISS band member was inducted to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2014

14. US city where the first 'Race for the Cure' was held (1983)

Name:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14
CROSSWORDS Her Magazine — October 202218

Name: Date: Period:

Breast Cancer

N W J D K H I E D I L N G O K J L W M H C H G D

P B Q N T C D H I E Q E Y L V H B B J D I S G R

T E I A L Y W Z S N T S G C E T U I T E V S G O

A P E A W M O V X D N E A I Z E U O R W C E J S

Q D J G R N N L R I K U C J Y J G W C O R X O I

H E A A F P D K B M Y A V T S T N J G P W L T J

F W Z G W W A N N G L I M G I F J I M T U X A D

I N S P I R A T I O N A L N H O I V B I P T T J

I S D S N A R T H H N B N I J N N K H M R C A H

Q T J R H X O L T Z T S E N G E Q I Z I J E S J

J R N P I U T L U E B N M E A M X M G S V Z H P

S O T R E A T M E N T N O E S B U A W T M Z T P

P N N R D B S R J B E F W R K V D T K I I U I M

H G G G Q Q P J H P D W Q C T M K G V C P X M X

T P P H V Z Y H V H N T W S I F Q S P X B N R D

C A N C E R E T T V W L P S X A E P W U O L O I

U U R E B O T C O E Z P Z J W E A C K B K E P A

M A L I G N A N T X G B Y A A C Q Y B V N E L G

H M U A S U P E D K E L R Y E B R I P O G G M N

U U B L Y U C M M U J E C V R H R Y A A O E B O

K G I T Z H U N Q X N P P E F E H G T Z N L Y S

A O A Q E S G M K E F U A R C V Q S K U P Q D E

D F B M Q V U I S M B S N G Q G K T Z H M U Z O

X K O R A Q U S X N T T H I Y G D U A O P Q R O

AWARENESS BREAST CANCER CHEMO DEATH DETECTION DIAGNOSE INSPIRATIONAL MALIGNANT MEN OCTOBER OPTIMISTIC PINK RIBBON SCREENING STAGE STRONG TATAS TREATMENT WOMEN WORDSEARCH 3040 Ev a ns St . Gr e e nville, NC 27 8 58 in Target Shopping Center halloweenexpress.com/greenvillenc Her Magazine — October 2022 19

River Walk Gallery in Washington, NC Celebrates 25 Years In Business

On October 14, 2022, from 6p.m.-8p.m., River Walk Gallery will celebrate its 25th Anniversary. A show featuring art from previous and current working artists will also be for sale at Arts of the Pamlico. River Walk Gallery will host a reception to celebrate with music performed by Ronny Cottle, along with food, wine and a free raffle for a chance to win miscellaneous gifts. There will be selected art items discounted 25%. Come out and help them celebrate!

River Walk Gallery located at 139 West Main Street in downtown Washington, North Carolina offers a stunning variety of fine art from over 50 multi-talented artists. For the past 25 years, they have continued to provide affordable, local, and regional art to thousands of shoppers throughout the United States. Artist mediums include all types of paintings, artistic iron work, pottery, jewelry, textiles, stained and fused glass, fiber art, drawings, scratch board etchings, photography, wood carvings, ink on tile and more! The gallery is staffed daily by one of these amazing knowledgeable working artists.

The gallery opened in 1997, as a co-operative art gallery and has remained a fixture in downtown Washington, North Carolina. The mission of River Walk Gallery is a co-operative venture to recruit and support talented, professional working and consignment artists to market a wide range of fine art available in the Historic District. Its vision is for River Walk Gallery to be the oldest, charming, co-operative gallery within an inclusive pedestrian friendly Harbor District, where a variety of small businesses and owners can flourish as a Central Business District on the water. They also offer a variety of workshops and classes throughout the year.

The success of the gallery has been due to the commitment of the artists working together to share the responsibilities as a unified team as well as the tremendous support of the community and patrons that visit everyday. Because they are a co-operative gallery, their creations are offered directly to shoppers at affordable prices. They would like to thank all of their patrons, businesses, residents and the Washington Harbor District Alliance for helping them sustain a successful gallery for twenty-five years. River Walk Gallery is open Monday-Saturday from 10a.m.-5p.m., some Sundays from 1p.m.-4p.m. and by appointment. For more information, visit the website, riverwalkgallery.com, email them at riverwalkgallery2016@gmail.com, or call 252-974-0400.

Riverwalk Gallery Working Artists

Sherry Allis ~ Libby Behr (Honorary) ~ Steve Berry ~ Heather Bowen ~ Myra Bowen ~ Charlotte’s Daughters: Ann Hines and Jean Smith ~ Beth Clark ~ Lou Everett Alicia Garver ~ Dodi and John Groesser: 2 happy painters ~ Norlina Kelly ~ Lynnette Pair ~ Denise Parry ~ Amanda Sanders ~ Carolyn Sleeper ~ Kim Valentine ~ Nancy Blass Winn ~ Gray Woolard

River Walk Gallery

Mon-Sat 10-5pm some Sundays 1-4pm &byappointment 252-974-0400 riverwalkgallery.com riverwalkgallery2016@gmail.com 139 West Main Street, Washington, NC 27889

WASHINGTON BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT
Her Magazine — October 202220

Katie Brown Davis RT(R)(M)(BS) Mammography and Breast Ultrasound Technologist at Carolina Breast Imaging Specialists

How long have you worked at CBIS? Almost eight years

Tell us about your family: I have an amazing and adventurous 11 year old son, Brent, who is my best buddy/number one world travel partner and a sassy Aussiedoodle named Murphy.

Favorite part about your job? Being able to educate and help women (and sometimes men) when they’re at their most vulnerable is one of the most gratifying things about my job. Whether it’s explaining to them that the lump they were terrified of getting checked out is just a simple cyst and is nothing to worry about, or holding their hand and letting them know we’re here for them when they’ve received less than desirable news. Breast imaging is so much more than just mammograms and ultrasounds. It’s taking care of the whole patient, mind and body.

What advancements would you like to see come in the future for breast cancer patients? Throughout my career, I’ve witnessed amazing progress in technology as we transitioned from 2D to 3D in both mammography and breast biopsy. Additionally, contrast mammography has been a great alternative to MRI. I certainly hope to see even further advances that make the exams more accurate and, of course, more comfortable.

MEDICAL SPOTLIGHT
Kelley Have n, MD,FACOG;Paige Fish er,M D, FACO G; Esth er Smith ,M D, FACO G; Steven Sp ruill ,M D, FACO G; William Brown, MD,FACOG;S arah Sears, CN M; Cierra Rowe ,AGNP Acce pt ing patient s. Ca ll fo ra na ppointm ent. greenvillewc.com| 252.757.3131 No matter yo ur st ag eoflife, yo u’ll re ceivec areinapra cticethatm eets yo ur nee ds andexp ec tations We of fe ra co mplete ra ng eof obstetrica nd gyn ecologic se rvices from ad ole scencethrough adulthood TrustedC are forWomen Through AllLife St ages Her Magazine — October 2022 21
Small Business Service Directory Find Me At The Harbor District Market In Downtown Washington, NC Thursday-Saturday We Also MakeCustom Creations 757-332-0500michelleelainedesigns@gmail.com Custom Bridal Jewelry Swarovski Crystals Creations ~Earrings My Sister’sAttic is asuppor tprogram of the 909 RedBanks Rd.,Greenville, NC 252-227-4594 Carryout By Chrislyn Your Event... Your Way 128East 2ndStreet Washington, NC 252-623-2014 www.carryoutbychrislyn.com Chrislyn Beresheim, Owner/Chef We’reheretohelp with your event,big or small! 144 WMain Street, Washington, NC 27889 (252) 940-0109 •www.SecretGardenGallery.net nt i e Join The Journey Hours MondaythruThursday9-6:30, Friday-Saturday9-2 Book online at www.vagaro.com/skinblissstudio SKIN BLISS LauraMcKeel-Gladson, Licensed Esthetician 3701 Charles Blvd.• Suite108 Greenville,NC27858 (252) 253-2881 With everypurchase of these Turn Paso Pink wines, you’ll be supporting the cause and will receive aFREEmini bottle of olive oil or vinegar through the month of October! Purple Cowboy Wine Raises Money ForBreastCancer Research Premium OliveOil &Vinegars, Wines From Around The World, Gifts&Much More! Her Magazine — October 202222

Juliana Ballestero, MD Breast Imaging at Eastern Radiology

How long have you worked at ER Imaging? 3.5 years

What made you choose Breast Imaging for your concentration? I am a body imager by fellowship training but, for varied reasons, I chose to dedicate my career to breast imaging in 2008. I was taught the art and science of breast imaging by experts in the field and unexpectedly found that I truly enjoy this subspecialty. Not only do I get to interpret multimodality imaging studies and perform image-guided procedures, but I also have the opportunity to comfort patients as I help them understand the issues that are associated with screening mammography, biopsies, and a potential cancer diagnosis. At times, this interaction has led to long-term doctor-patient relationships, something that is quite unusual in the field of Diagnostic Radiology.

Tell us about your family? I am Hispanic and fluent in Spanish. I am a first generation American, born and raised in the US – daughter of Argentine immigrants. I have been married for almost 20 years and live with my family in the Tidewater region of Virginia. My husband is an ophthalmologist specializing in corneal diseases. We have one daughter who just started college this August. We prefer dogs to cats … Pepsi to Coke … lakes to oceans ... coffee to tea!

What are your thoughts on the recent recommendations by various groups and task forces to delay mammograms until age 50? I wholeheartedly disagree. I stand behind the American College of Radiology, the Society of Breast Imaging, and the American Society of Breast Surgeons in continuing to recommend that women of average risk start getting annual mammograms at age 40.

MEDICAL SPOTLIGHT
CALL ME! 2 2- 7 -11 0 CLARK B NC , REALTOR © 25 - 55-2000 Pa m B u c k Over y s in r al ate! Allow me to help you! Want to buy or sell ahome? Paid for by The Citizens To Elect Gar y eaver ELECT gar ywea verfor sheriff. com ★★ ★★ GAR FOR WEAVER SHERIFF ote on No ember 8th ✔ Her Magazine — October 2022 23

McCabe's

When my kids were younger and more cooperative in my efforts to dress them up for Halloween, I loved creating unique costumes based on their requests. They often requested a costume you simply could not purchase at a store, so I would have to create that perfect costume. Now they are teenagers and don't have an interest in dressing up, so I am now channeling my years of experience to help others find that perfect costume. This informal tradition was the start of McCabe's Costumes; I also love all things Halloween (especially classic horror movies). Most Halloween stores go out of their way to scare you to death; we aim to be a family-friendly alternative to traditional Halloween stores. Not everyone wants to be bombarded with loud noises and smoke, not to mention the scary things leaping out of the woodwork to terrify you. We carry many popular licenses, such as Marvel, Star Wars, DC, etc., but we also have different options, including helping people put together their perfect creations. You can bring us an idea, or we can help you put your own personalized twist on a popular character. Want to include your pet in the fun? We have many pet options arriving every week!

With the popularity of Stranger Things, all things 80s are hot costume ideas, although we carry costumes of all decades. If you are not sold on wearing a costume or want to be festive throughout the holiday, check out our fabulous suits and clothing. We also have stylish Halloween purses, clutches, and wallets that are great year-round. How about mixing holidays? We have Christmas and Easter costumes for those that want to expand the holiday motif. Whatever you decide, McCabe's Costumes is your one-stop, year-round costume shop. We expect some surprises in our arriving inventory and hope the supply chain continues cooperating with us. Most of our orders were made in January, so we are optimistic that our pre-planning will pay off.

You can shop in-store at 4054 S Memorial Dr., Suite O Winterville with extended hours for Halloween (starting 9/18) Mon-Fri 12-8, Sat & Sun 12-6. You can also shop online anytime, and we offer in-store pickup, local delivery, and flat fee shipping of $8.

REVEAL YOUR TRUE CHARACTER AT MCCABE'S COSTUMES!
Costumes The best-kept secret in Winterville GREENVILLE BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT
Costumes ForAny Season HolidayApparel ~Pet Costumes &Birthday PartyBoxes 4054 SouthMemorial Drive, SuiteO Winter ville, NC • 252-295-7691 www.mccabescostumes.com Women’s Costumes s eCostumes n ’ s Costumes Children’ Infants’ Costumes Her Magazine — October 202224

Celebrating Spiritual Care Week

October 23-29 is Spiritual Care Week. Since October 1985, the Council on Ministry in Specialized Settings (COMISS) network has chosen a theme to help spiritual caregivers share their perspectives. This year’s spiritual care week theme is Relevant and Responsive in Times of Crisis. During COVD-19, chaplains worked alongside colleagues at hospitals, hospices, retirement communities, prisons, colleges, businesses, and military bases, providing spiritual and emotional support,

Chaplain Connie Belmore, Cypress Glen

guidance, hope, and bereavement care. As essential workers, chaplains used creative methods to ensure spiritual needs continued to be met. In addition to personal introspection; I spoke with chaplains Connie Belmore at Cypress Glen, Veleria Holloway with ECU Health Inpatient Hospice and Amy Barnwell, United States Air Force Reserves to reflect on this year’s theme.

How did you become a chaplain? I am an ordained minister in the United Methodist Church and pastored a small church in Eureka, NC. I did not set out to be a chaplain but received a call asking me to consider the job as chaplain at Cypress Glen. After much prayer, I interviewed, was selected for the job, and now know it was meant to be.

What is the role of the chaplain in your organization? I believe my role at Cypress Glen Is to provide spiritual care for the residents. One’s spiritual needs do not change because an address has changed. I believe I represent hope, love, joy and peace. As some of our residents approach the end of life some are asking questions such as what is next.

How did the pandemic impact your work? I started working at Cypress Glen in July 2021. The residents were just starting to eat meals together again and visit with their families. Currently, residents attend worship services in the chapel or in health care areas weekly. We look forward to when family can again join us for worship with their loved ones.

Spiritual caregiving can be demanding. What are some ways you take care of yourself? Rest, enjoying my pets, and having an identified Sabbath are ways I care for myself. I also spend quality time with my family.

Chaplain Veleria Holloway, ECU Health Inpatient Hospice

How did you become a chaplain? It is a calling. I enrolled in a clinical pastoral education program in 2003. While completing my internship and residency, I realized I enjoyed working with patients who were at the end of life. In 2008, I was hired as a full-time chaplain at the Inpatient Hospice.

What is the role of the chaplain in your organization? As a hospice chaplain my role consists of active listening without judgment, completing spiritual assessments to address the patient's identified needs and working collaboratively with the interdisciplinary treatment team to meet those needs. After the patient’s death, I continue to work with the patient’s family for twelve months through our bereavement care program.

How did the pandemic impact your work? At the beginning of the pandemic, family visits were limited. For some patients and families, I helped them use contactless communication such as writing notes to each other, phone calls, face-time and even catching a glimpse of each other through the window. The lack of physical contact was challenging for many patients and families because they could not say goodbye the way they wanted.

Spiritual caregiving can be demanding. What are some ways you take care of yourself? I go on solo retreats where I journal and connect to nature. I enjoy cartoons and adult coloring books. Prayer and remaining connected to God are also a part of my self-care practice.

Her Magazine — October 2022 25

Chaplain Captain Amy Barnwell, United States Air Force Reserves

How did you become a chaplain? I enlisted in the Air Force as a reservist. One of my supervisors encouraged me to consider becoming an officer and suggested a number of careers including chaplaincy. After prayer and consultation with my pastor I enrolled in the chaplain candidate program.

What is the role of the chaplain in your organization? The role of the military chaplain is to ensure the first amendment right of freedom of religion is protected and provide for the religious freedom of service members and their families. As a military chaplain no two days are alike. I advise leadership, provide counseling as well as group activities for service members and their families, weddings, funerals, offer invocations at award and change of command services, and I visit service members’ work area to offer support.

How did the pandemic impact your work? At the onset of the pandemic counseling sessions continued. Our worship services were streamed and continued with gathering limitations. For some, being separated and closed off made them more susceptible to depression and suicidal thoughts. As a military chaplain my role is to provide leadership prevention and postvention suicide resources to address the unit, family, and community. Being able to engage and reconnect as a community has been one of the protective factors we are starting to enjoy again.

Spiritual caregiving can be demanding. What are some ways you take care of yourself? I attend to my personal and spiritual tanks. For my spiritual tank, I participate in bible study, meditation, prayer, worship, and fasting so I don’t deplete myself to the point that I am frustrated, weakened, and unable to effectively support those in my care. For my personal tank, I spend time doing things I enjoy such as singing, exercising, vacationing, and spending time with family.

Acknowledgment is one of the ways you can celebrate the spiritual caregivers in your organization. Additional suggestions can be found at www.spiritualcareweek.com.

Martha Brown is a board certified chaplain and interpersonal communication instructor. She has served in various governmental and private institutions. In October, Brown was a recipient of the NC Governor's Award for Excellence in the category of Human Relations. Nicknamed by a coworker, Chaplain Extra, Brown plays as hard as she works. When not living up to her nickname, she enjoys spending time with family and friends, traveling (by plane, train, automobile or ship), reading, and laughing.

I therapy has the benefits of fast delivery with 100 absorption to reduce the possibility of illness, restore vitamin levels & energy and complete re hydration 252-350 -1805 2459 EMER LD PLACE, STE 104, GREENVILLE RE I EHE LTH ELLNESS.ORG I & IT MIN H DR IONSER ICES MEDIC L EIGH LOSSDr.Brittany Squires 410 Spring Forest Road Greenville,NC27834 252-650-5774 OURSERVICES General Dentistry• Implants •Cosmetic Endodontics •Restorative•Periodontics Oral Surgery •Orthodontics NOWACCEPTING NEWPATIENTS! Her Magazine — October 202226

SONYA HALL

How old were you when you found out you had breast cancer? 51 years-old

How did you find your cancer? Annual Mammogram

What treatments did you have and how long did that take? Lumpectomy and Radiation treatments

How long have you been cancer free? 15 months

How has cancer changed your life? I always thought I was a grateful person, but I am ever more grateful for the smallest things and the time I spend with my family.

What advice would you give to others who may be dealing with their own cancer journey? Breathe; Be strong. God does not make mistakes and you must hold onto HIS promises. He has a purpose and plan and God’s plans are always PERFECT.

Did you have any books, quotes, or routines that helped you through your cancer journey? The Bible – I held onto Ephesians 3:20 “Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all we ask or think, according to the power at work within us.” I had just changed jobs after 14 years. I was determined to not let this diagnosis consume me. I got up every day during radiation determined to go to work (radiation was 2x daily). I didn’t miss one day of work during radiation. I kept up my daily routines.

SURVIVOR SPOTLIGHT Her Magazine — October 2022 27

Lisa C. Allen Publishes her first fiction novel

Earlier this summer, Greenville resident, Lisa C. Allen published her first fiction book, The Key in Willow Tree. Lisa C. Allen is a writer with roots in eastern North Carolina. Much of her career has been spent in the publishing and multimedia arena. She was the publisher and editor of The Winterville Resident News for several years. The Key in the Willow Tree is her debut novel. She enjoys the occasional visit to the mountains and the beaches she mentions in her book, as well as painting those two landscapes. She lives in Winterville, NC with her husband, Sam and enjoys spending time with her children and granddaughters.

Lisa had dreams of one day writing a book. Then enter the world of COVID when people stayed home. “My normal default for stress release is to read a book or paint on the canvas. I did do some of that during the first part of the lockdown. But one evening, as I sat in my rocking chair on my screened porch, I felt the urge to start something. What did I have to lose? It was not wasted time because our time was already being governed by the powers to be. Stay home. Go nowhere. Isolation. I missed time with my family. I missed church. I needed to find a survival plan to fill up the space in my head that wanted to wonder about the state of affairs at hand. So what did I do? I started writing a fictional story to keep me sane. I took pieces of life from all walks of life and, of course, loaded it down with southern twang and style. After all, you write about what you know and I know southern. I also know that bonds amongst friends are a life line during difficult times. So I created a world of four women and the journey through a period of their lives that changed the trajectory of their future.” Within a couple of years, The Key in Willow Tree novel was born.

The Key in the Willow Tree is an engaging and inspiring saga of friendship, family, difficult choices, and life-changing decisions. Readers describe her novel as “The perfect beachside or poolside book…with a fun plot (with a twist),” and a book with “characters that feel like your own girlfriends, the way women come together for each other. For a first time author, Lisa Allen brings enthusiasm, creativity and excitement to the reader.”

The Key in Willow Tree is set in eastern North Carolina. What starts out as a fun-filled beach getaway, quickly turns into a dramatic series of events that lead to changes in the lives of four dynamic women. Leslie, Carrie, Sandra, and Laney all reside in the sleepy Southern town of Greenway, North Carolina. With fierce grit and tenacity, each of the four women wrestles with their own personal demons. The four friends support each other, but it’s all weighing heavy and taking a toll. When they decide to take a much-needed trip to a “happy place,” the first destination is Emerald Isle, North Carolina. Their dream vacation is soon interrupted by a pivotal and tragic event back home that interrupts all plans and changes the course of many lives. The bond these four friends share is a tightly woven tapestry of love and devotion that creates the foundation of a new life. Together they find the keys to survival, restoration, and a path toward what they each desire.

The Key in The Willow Tree is available wherever books are sold. Copies are available at Barnes and Noble in Greenville and other locations. For more information on booking the author for speaking engagements, contact her via her website, https://thekeyinthewillowtree.com or email her at lisaallen@thekeyinthewillowtree.com.

Get swept away in a whirlwind adventure about love, hope, perseverance, and healing.
SUCCESS
Her Magazine — October 202228
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PAULA LOFTIN

How old were you when you found out you had breast cancer? 51

How did you find your cancer? I had a “pre-cancerous” condition that required surgery in June 2021. I had a follow up Mammogram and Ultrasound that did not show the cancer. It was an MRI that was done out of an abundance of caution that the cancer was discovered.

What treatments did you have and how long did that take? My cancer was stage zero. I had surgery May 24, 2022 along with 20 radiation treatments from June 21 – July 20, 2022.

How long have you been cancer free? Technically, since my surgery May 24, 2022, so three months.

How has cancer changed your life? For more than 25 years I have worked to fundraiser for cancer awareness. When I was diagnosed on April 8, 2022, it was difficult news to hear, but I count myself blessed that my case was early detection. I have viewed my situation optimistically knowing that God is always watching over me.

What advice would you give to others who may be dealing with their own cancer journey? Embrace your journey. The courage it takes to share your story might be the very thing someone else needs to open their heart to hope.

Did you have any books, quotes, or routines that helped you through your cancer journey? My bible is and always will be the one book that I turn to. Jeremiah 30:17 – "I will restore you to health to you and heal you of your wounds, says the Lord." My routine was to journal my journey. Sharing publicly through social meeting and conversations was a way for me to help share for others who may be to private to do so.

My favorite quote: You just can’t beat the person who won’t give up. - Babe Ruth

SURVIVOR SPOTLIGHT Her Magazine — October 202230
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Remembering the life of Brandy Edwards Duke

“Make lemonade out of lemons. at the full of half empty. in the the dag-gum that you’ve been THOSE they are oh so remember you are BRAVER than you think, than you seem and LOVED more than you know.”
1975-2022
Look
glass half
instead
LIVE
PRESENT!! And take
trip
putting off and MAKE
MEMORIES!! Because
precious!!!” “Always
STRONGER
“I will not be shaken.” - Psalm 16:8
“I LOVE YOU BIG!!! “Give it to God.”
“Sometimes you just need a double cheeseburger and a Coke from McDonalds”
“I love the color Pink”
Her Magazine — October 2022 35

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OCTOBER IS BREAST CANCER AWARENSS MONTH schedulemymammography.com Her Magazine — October 202236

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