Men in Progress | January 2016

REAL MEN

YOU’RE THE MAN

GADGETS & GIZMOS

THE GYM

Listen More, Love More

Striving for Skillful Living

Kilala Mo Ba Si MacGyVer?

SHARPENING THE SAW

The Builder

New Work in Progress

by Revodem B. Avarientos

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inding a new job can be exciting. It’s an opportunity to meet new people, learn new things and see a new work environment.

However, once the ‘awe and wonder’ clears, you can feel overwhelmed with the many things you do not know. Here are some important things to remember on how you can adapt quickly and keep a positive attitude at work: Impress to express. In the office, your colleagues and boss will gauge how they will treat you based on how you present yourself to them.

It is important to make a good impression early on by being friendly and humble Put your good foot forward, not just to appear nice, but so you can effectively communicate, eliciting a favorable response. At the start, it’s important that you get all the help you can to do your job effectively.

Ask questions. Do not be shy about asking questions. Your boss and officemates won’t expect you to know everything. It is far better to be safe than to be sorry.

Know the culture. Each company has its own

culture and norms. Learn to adapt. You will never progress if you insist on doing your own thing.

Conforming to the culture of the company will enable others to easily help you adjust better.

Develop relationships. Identify the people that are valuable in making your job easier. Making an extra effort in being “a nice guy” will lead to good working relationships. A healthy relationship with your boss and officemates will help you become effective and efficient.

S.W.O.T. yourself. After fully understanding your job, determine the following: • Strengths − Identify your strengths and don’t be afraid to let your boss recognize your skills.

• Weaknesses – Work on your weaknesses, things you don’t know.

• Opportunities − Try to have a keen eye in spotting opportunities on how to work effectively and efficiently.

• Threats – These are unnecessary problems to avoid. Take notes during employee orientation so you will clearly understand company rules and regulations.

Give yourself time to adjust. Give yourself time to pace yourself and enjoy the learning curve. Just make sure that you are transparent by regularly consulting your boss and colleagues for better understanding.

REAL MEN

Listen More, Love More

by Joshua Kho

“H

indi mo na kailangan humingi ng tawad sa ‘kin, kasi hindi mo naman ako naapektuhan sa kahit anong bagay. I deleted you on Facebook months ago, that was a hint. Hindi na ako masyado nagre-reply sa ’yo, dapat naintindihan mo na kung ano’ng ibig sabihin ko ’nun.”

I was the one on the receiving end of that message. I found myself rejected and un-friended by a woman I really admire. I met her during an event for young adults. Back then, I thought we really had a perfect time getting to know each other. But the acquaintance only lasted for a couple of months, then it went sour. I got really depressed for the first time. So how come what started pleasantly ended up in a mess?

One of the reasons I think why the friendship didn’t materialize was that, I didn’t know how to really listen. May nabasa akong libro: “The Lost Art of Listening.” Sabi dito, “The heart of listening is the struggle to suspend our own needs.”

Karamihan sa atin akala natin magaling tayo sa pakikinig sa mga conversations natin sa ating pamilya, kaibigan, karelasyon, ka-officemate at iba pa. Ang totoo hindi lahat ay marunong makinig.

Minsan kapag may kausap tayo, imbes na makinig sa sinasabi ng ating kausap, ay nag-iisip na tayo agad kung ano ‘yung sasabihin natin.

Ang tunay na pakikinig ay mahirap kasi ibinibigay natin ang lahat ng ating attention sa kausap 2

natin, pilit na iniintindi kung ano ang sinasabi at nararamdaman nila. Gusto natin na maramdaman ng ating kausap na ang lahat ng sinasabi nila ay naririnig at pinapahalagahan natin.

We must improve our listening skills because we actually express love to someone when we take time to listen to them. Kapag tayo ay nakikinig, tayo ay nagmamahal.

‘Yung nangyari sa akin….because I liked the woman very much, masyado akong nag-focus sa kung ano’ng dapat sabihin ko sa kanya: “Ano kaya’ng magiging reaction nya kapag sinabi ko ’to?”

“Baka mag-iba’ng tingin nya sa ‘kin kapag ito ang isinagot ko…, etc.”Naka-focus lang ako sa sarili ko, hindi ko talaga naririnig ang sinasabi niya. Dahil dun hindi ko siya talaga nakilala at hindi lumago ‘yung aming pagiging magkaibigan. Buti na lang, mabait ang Panginoon, hindi nya ako papabayaan kahit sa mga pagkakamali ko. Marami akong natutunan sa nangyari, isa dun ang importance ng pakikinig.

Now, I try to listen well—to really know and feel the experiences of others during conversations. Sana lahat tayo maging better listeners. Remember, when we listen, we love. By being more loving we can keep the relationships that matter most to us.

You’Re THE MAN

Gadgets & Gizmos

Striving for Skillful Living

Kilala Mo ba si MacGyver?

by Jess Tomagan

by Alvin Eleazar G. Tud

A

K

re you a guy skillful in your job? Why not be skilled in living as well? Skillful living, in other words, “wise living.” There’s no secret formula for that. The Bible says, “Skilled living gets its start in the Fear-of-God” (Proverbs 9:10, MSG.) Fear-of-God? It’s a topic too far out for us.

For those who can relate, we dare not discuss it.

This idea conveys a picture of God as an “angry, old Grandpa”, always ready to whip us unruly children into discipline. We certainly don’t like this topic. Health, wealth, and success sound more appealing. These subjects surely make us feel good.

However, the Bible is a “complete meal”. To grow holistically healthy, we must also consume the “spiritual meat and veggies”.

To grow in spirituality we must aim to be exposed to the whole Word of God, not just our favorite passages that make us feel okay. If one obeys the Word we move from foolish living to skillful living…from darkness to light.

The fear-of-God involves a change in the attitude of the heart. The Lord himself cries, “Oh, that they would always have hearts like this, that they might fear me and obey all my commands!

If they did, they and their descendants would prosper forever. (Deuteronomy 5:29, NLT). Fearof -God is also a choice to good and to hate evil.

Living in the fear-of-God will make us ask Him each day to teach us to count our days so we will be wise. (Psalm 90:12) Consequently, the fear-of-God brings wisdom and understanding. With it, we will not waste our lives on things that don’t last, but rather on things with eternal value. These things that really matter will significantly affect us and our loved ones, now and in the hereafter.

And the good news is that this “skillful living” is always available for everyone. James exhorts, “If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and He will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking” (James 1:5, NLT). Asking for it is wisdom already.

ilala mo ba si MacGyver? He was a secret agent in a TV series in the 90’s. He was a “handyman” at the highest level—fixing practically anything with the simplest tools. I wanted to be like him,however, my mom taught me “women stuff,” not stereotyping here-- cooking, washing and ironing clothes, cleaning. While there is nothing wrong with learning household chores, I really wanted to do “men stuff”—fix broken things, do carpentry, etc. So, when I became a husband, I felt obligated to at least try fixing things at home.

I needed to change my perspective on manual work. If you’re like me, here are suggestions on how to get started.

• Start using simple tools. Subukan mag-repair ng inyong mga nasisirang cabinet doors by using simple tools tulad ng martilyo, pliers, screw driver, at iba pa. You don’t need hi tech, complicated gadgets and gizmos, to do things. Tools make work easier. Usually, I ask skilled people how to use tools that I am not familiar with. The internet is a good resource on “do-it-yourself” jobs.

• Try it to like it! I like to be in my “comfort zone.” I didn’t feel comfortable with “fixing things” pero nang sinimulan ko, nagustuhan ko din. Kaya ko pala. It feels good when you accomplish something.

• Do it to make your spouse happy. Someone said, “happy wife, happy life.” I agree. That’s a wise goal. My late father-in-law was like a Macgyver. He was a handyman. Hindi man ako naging katulad niya, ang subukang pasayahin ang kaniyang anak kahit sa simpleng bagay ay parangal na rin sa kanya.

• Do it to glorify God. I best serve God when I teach and communicate. But, I also honor God when I do tasks at home, not grudgingly, but with delight. We can honor God when we do what is right with the right attitude and motives, kahit saang lugar, araw-araw. It’s not too late to start.

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THE GYM

Sharpening the Saw

by Nathan Maliwat

I

n our results-driven world, we can get so caught up in our day to day activities that we forget to pause and take a breather.

While we can get good results from working hard, it can also exhaust us and worse, bring us chronic illnesses and broken relationships. Long term stress can deplete not only our physical strength but also our emotional and psychological resources.

Some tell-tale signs that we lack balance in our lives include the following symptoms: • Emotions - irritability, moodiness, anxiety, depression, feelings of worthlessness, feeling overwhelmed or losing control of things • Body - headaches, hyperacidity, insomnia, low energy, chest pain • Mind - lack of focus, forgetfulness, pessimism, constant worrying Do you experience any of these symptoms when at work? If so, then there might be a growing imbalance between your life and work. What you need to do is to spend more time for yourself to regain enthusiasm and passion in life.

Most people feel guilty about having “Me” time. This is especially true for those with responsibilities —such as a father, a boss or a family breadwinner. But spending time for

yourself is not altogether selfish. It’s actually a way to be better at what you do.

Think of yourself as a carpenter using a dull saw to cut wood. How long would it take you to do the job? Seasoned woodcutters would stop cutting, and start sharpening the saw.

Taking a breather also makes us more productive. By releasing stress, we are able to think clearly and be fully engaged at work. We are also able to dodge the health risks of chronic stress. Would you rather take some time off from work to relax or to recover from illness?

If machines need regular maintenance, how much more our bodies that God designed to have limits?

Having “me” time can be as simple as blocking off 15-30mins to walk, read a book, or do a favorite hobby. Find an activity that relaxes you and make sure to commit to it every day.

EDITORIAL STAFF Editor Alvin Tud Layout Design Patrick Tan Distribution Johnson Li Executive Editor Kim Snider

Published quarterly by

Asia Pacific Media Ministries Unit 2608 Raffles Corporate Center, Emerald Avenue, Ortigas Center, 1605 Pasig City, Philippines Telephone: 914-9767 E-mail: mip@apmedia.org Website: www.apmedia.ph Reproduction of photos and articles is prohibited without permission.

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