Art Department Weekly | Issues 61-68 Vol. 2 by Art Department Weekly

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JV started in Fact just a few days before Halloween, about nine months ago, and by the Halloween party he was practically family. In less than a week, he had become a good friend, and within a month we were joking and fighting like brothers. Beyond the shenanigans, which ranged from ridiculous costumes to Macy’s-scale Christmas decorations, I remember one thought in particular providing a sense of relief: In the stormy sea of estrogen that is Niche, it was great that we had each other’s back.

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art dePartment WeeKLY ISSUE 61 VOL. 2

As the weather grew warmer, however, I began to learn, through Mr. V’s unique example, that I had it all wrong. Not that he didn’t imbue an even stronger sense of loyalty and solidarity in what was already Niche’s tightest-knit department, but rather that he exercised his nonchalant amiability, charity, and boisterous joviality both liberally and without prejudice. In other words, he brought people together because he ignored the prejudices and distrust that many automatically feel here, and through (what I initially thought of as) this naïveté he made friends, broke down barriers, and connected people in ways I never thought possible. For that alone I feel extremely grateful to have shared a table with John, and when you add to that his wacky humor, his intelligent insight, his vast talent and his fiery enthusiasm, I think I speak for all of Fact in writing that he is a friend that we will never forget. Thanks for everything man, and keep it real in Kansas. —Chris B JV aka Cobra aka Jay Vee, Thank you for your friendship and your upbeat attitude. I wish you all the very best in the future. The or the...Black Pants... Binndana...Hamptons...Silly Bandz...Phish...Fish...My favorite boys... You will be missed!!! Unzipped and Lisa Skolnik will definitely miss you too. XoXo, Marina

LEBRON JAMES george steinBrenner HARVEY PEKAR shePPard faireY PLuS: John DAVE riCh DAN roBonaut 2

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“Who goes into 7Eleven and asks for the hummus platter?” -Luis

Go, flash, Go! Rich sent this. We think it’s genius. Thanks, Rich!

“That’s a slippery little pickle” -madeline

“....and I want to stay hot so I can get hired anywhere” -vanessa

“It’s just something he picked up to seem less gay” -madeline

rise of The Machines NASA and GM teamed up to build a robot that could make the repairs that astronauts cannot. After reading how exponentially the technology has improved from R1 to R2, the Dubbs wonders, How long before these things are taking over the earth T-100-style and we have to send Kyle Reese back from the future to stop them from murdering the mother of the resistance leader? Robonaut can do 30lb curls. I’m sure the next iteration will be able to do 300lb curls while sitting on a tank firing a machine gun. If they start to make them look like the Governator, we’re all doomed. Not sure if you trust Robonaut? Follow him on Twitter: “My new twin is in the works. The hand is being constructed and tested.” I for one am getting a German Sheppard... —LV

1 parT Brooklyn This is not a picture of Spike Lee’s Absolut Brooklyn cocktail. There is no way the drink in that picture tastes as good. Last week we purchased a bottle of the apple and ginger flavored vodka and tried it straight up. That was too much. We bought the necessary cranberry juice and gingerale. The first glass was amazing. The next wasn’t right. Paying more attention to pours, each glass after has been tasty. —MV

“I mean, if I’m Yogi, I’m getting myself checked out” -drm

“She’s too busy bumping other people with it” -madeline

“Can’t you just see a fat vampire wanting to suck that? She’s stupid” -Luis

“I’m putting in the ‘tee hee hee’” -madeline

This past 7/4 weekend was filled to the brim with the beach, beers, burgers, softball, beer pong, walk-off Yankee wins, babies and a watermelon shark. Here is how I celebrated America’s 243rd b’day: FRidaY – After our early out, I ran back to

Queens to quickly pack up for the weekend and head to Long Island. My roommate was already out east and suggested we have batting practice since our game was cancelled. So, after sitting in horrendous holiday traffic for three hours, I finally show up to ‘batting practice’ to find no one has a bat. Deciding to have a quick catch instead, we were eventually kicked off the field due to a game previously scheduled. My buddy Steve suggested we cool off in his house with a few beers, which was great as I got to see his little daughter, Gigi. After a few drinks, I decided to call it a night as I was heading to the beach in the morning. SatuRdaY – Around 11 a.m., my younger bro, Michael, and I jumped in his truck and

headed to Smith Point. I have been to this beach countless times as this was basically everyone’s high school hang out if you were from middle Suffolk County. No matter though, I was just ready for some sun. Being that my 18-year-old brother offered to drive, I was afforded the opportunity to have a few beverages on the beach…in the sun… on no breakfast. Around beer No. 7, the hunger pangs set in and Mike and I decided to head home. I was greeted at my mom’s with chicken kabobs, burgers, dogs and more beers. After dinner, I decided to take a quick nap around 6:30 p.m. My quick nap lasted until 3:30 a.m. All that sun caught up to me. SundaY – Having slept 17 hours the night before (yes, I fell back asleep until 11 a.m. the next day—I guess I needed it), I was ready to party on Sunday. The family came over around noon for some light BBQ fare and beers and it was good to see them again. After watching the Yanks walk-off win against the Blue Jays, I went over to my buddy Kevin’s for a good ol’ fashion BBQ/Beer Pong Tournament. Kevin is the creative type, and he carved this shark out of a watermelon. Enamored with this culinary creation, I dove right in. It wasn’t until my tenth piece of watermelon that I find out the fruit had been soaking in raspberry vodka. Needless to say, I was feeling pretty good. Once the sun went down, the tournament started. After four hours of play, my buddy Kevin and I hoisted the cup in victory! mondaY – After a weekend of booze and sun, Monday was a day of recovery, hanging with the family and reflecting on how all this awesome stuff is possible in the land of the free and the home of the brave.

Long Live America the Beautiful!

—DRM

class M license, check I believe everyone has a “Bucket List” or as the diluted, positive, wusses would say a “Life Goal List”. I don’t have an official written one anymore but I do have a few in the back of my head that I need to get done. This weekend I accomplished one of them and received my motorcycle license. With my buddy Ryan, I took a weekend-long course. We passed our road tests on Sunday. Now the question is, “Do I get the Triumph or the BMW?” —Rich

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I’m guess I shouldn’t be surprised to see that performance obviously doesn’t have anything to do with election to the All-Star team. In addition to having better numbers in almost every category, Pauley has been carrying a struggling Sox team all season while that other guy has been coasting along with a super-team. There is no justice in the baseball world--apparently not in the basketball world either--I see Labron is signing with D-Wade and Bosh. I hope they never win a championship! I dislike Pat Riley more than Nick Swisher. I will actually be rooting for the rapist if the finals are between your Lakers and the Heat next year. Kobe has shown some class the last few years while Labron has shown none during the free-agency process--and that after an un-champion like effort in the Celtic series. I hope the “Swish” enjoys his first, unwarranted, and undoubtedly last All-Star trip. —[name withheld]

I know I’m a mom and that makes me completely uncool now, but what the fuck. Just because you’ve been named an all-star and are great enough to hit that meatball being lobbed at you into the bleachers does not give you a free pass to ditch the batting helmet. In fact, because you are an all-star and this is the home run hitting contest, you need to set a better example and wear the fucking helmet. To completely spell it out for you, there are little kids watching, salivating, wishing they could do everything you do. How much more do you need to be paid before you can be a good role model? —MV

God haTes nerds!!!

r e oV ed

WESTBORO BAPTIST TO PROTEST AT COMIC-CON At Comic-Con, lots of people wear costumes. It seems that on at least one day, a whole group of people will dress up as a bunch of assholes. Yep, that’s right; apparently since they have nothing better to do, members of the Topeka, Kansas-based Westboro Baptist Church, which is led by Fred Phelps, plan to picket Comic-Con in San Diego. In case you’re lucky enough to not know who I’m talking about, these are the douchecanoes who protest at the funerals of servicemen and -women killed overseas. Classy, right? Now why, you’re asking, are they protesting the nerd prom? You may have seen this quote around the Interwebz; it’s from the WBC site: “Are you kidding?! If these people would spend even some of the energy that they spend on these comic books, reading the Bible, well no high hopes here. They have turned comic book characters into idols, and worship them they do! Isaiah 2:8 Their land also is full of idols; they worship the work of their own hands, that which their own fingers have made: 9 And the mean man boweth down, and the great man humbleth himself: therefore forgive them not. It is time to put away the silly vanities and turn to God like you mean it. The destruction of this nation is imminent – so start calling on Batman and Superman now, see if they can pull you from the mess that you have created with all your silly idolatry.” Riiiiiiiiiight. Well, apparently they are so incensed about this travesty that they’re going to protest for a whole 45 minutes on Thursday (1:15 p.m. to 2 p.m.), which though heavily populated, isn’t nearly as crowded as Friday or Saturday. And that’s if they even show up. It would be worth the price of admission to see someone dressed up as Buddy Christ tell them all to go piss up a rope.

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MiGhTy Good

People of Niche, stop wasting your time on loved ones, closing that issue of Hamptons, hygiene, or finishing that burrito. You need to watch yourself some Mighty Boosh. Recently I was introduced to a BBC show called The Mighty Boosh that has completely taken over my mind. The show follows two friends, Howard Moon (Julian Barrat) and Vince Noir (Noel Fielding) who have such bizarre adventures, they defy description. Every season they completely change the backdrop to the story. They are zookeepers, they are musicians, they are antique shop employees. Every episode has at least one musical moment, elaborate costumes, and a small cast of involved actors—incorporating elements of the show’s history as a stage show which gives it such a unique tone. Many side characters are played by Julian or Noel in costume, sometimes so well that you would be running to Google to check to see if it is in fact them. Besides starring in the show, they are also the main writers and costume designers. I’m still only about half way through the second season ( they are up to three now) and every episode has tons of memorable moments, such as a man being raped by a queen yeti, magazines delivered by ninjas, a grandma apocalypse called the Nanageddon, monkey hell, and a man punching out a young boy dressed as a kangaroo. I have all three seasons downloaded, so just ask and I’ll burn them for you! —Rich

one More nerdy TidBiT

I was excited when DC announced the Green Lantern movie. Hell, I was even excited when they announced Ryan Reynolds as Hal Jordan. Now I know I should wait to reserve judgement until I see a preview and see how this looks in motion, but you know what I’m not excited about? The crappy costume. What is that thing? The strange glowing-green-muscle-tissue-look is nothing like the comic version. While Marvel has been busy making real world costumes for their movies that coincide with their comics counterparts, DC does this. I simply don’t understand. —LV

on deaTh and ohio We at the Dubbs write about current events that interest us. Somehow this week, many of the events that interested us tied back to Ohio and/or death. Hence, we’ve stumbled upon a theme issue that wouldn’t fly in most pitch meetings, but we think it’s pretty great. First, who doesn’t have something to say about Lebron and The Decision? I for one feel an hour-long special on ESPN is a terrible way to let your long-time employer (and a city of fans) know that you plan to move on with your career. JV is leaving Niche, but you don’t see “The Decision” listed on his IMDB credits. (No, seriously, go look.) Maybe that’s because he has class. But, I digress, Lebron should have simply called Cavs owner Dan Gilbert and saved the world the disturbing image of just how big an ego can grow. Lebron was an absolute hometown hero. Born in Akron, he took his high school to the title. The belief was that he would one day lead the Cavs to the promised land. They were close... very close. But now we’ll never know if he could have sealed the deal. He has rightly changed his number from 23. Check out our “Poor Ohio” spread for a true Ohioan’s perspective on the break-up. This issue also features a good-bye to Ohio-born Yankee icon George Steinbrenner. Love him, hate him, he set a goal and he achieved it. Read more about him in “Poor Yankee Fans.” The fair city of Cleveland also lost legendary cartoonist Harvey Pekar this week. While Lebron fled for Miami, Harvey spent his whole life in Cleveland. His

works are legendary for their honest and simple portrayal of human life. While we have a short article on Pekar (see “Poor Ohio”) our Artist We Like this week is Ohio native Sheperd Fairey. He is a great contemporary artist whose work inspired a nation. And then, just in case you’ve had a beyond-terrible week and can’t think anymore about death or sad endings, we have plenty of fluffier pieces. Take a peek into DRM’s Fourth of July debauchery, ride motorcycles and watch TV with Rich, and join the nerd-hating Baptists at Comic Con. If none of that puts you in better spirits, read up on how to mix Spike Lee’s Absolut Brooklyn cocktail. It’s delish.

Last week I really wanted to put “Missing Missy” in the issue. But it didn’t make the cut and by now everyone in publishing has already seen it, so we are just behind the ball and lame if we talk about it here. But not everyone’s reading the email thread the same way. Here at Art Department Weekly, we are automatically sympathetic to the designer and find his creations brilliant. But there are editors who read that chain and actually admire how calm the secretary remains when faced with movie-style posters and little red hats. What is the designer thinking?! And obviously she couldn’t possibly open a Word document and do it “the right way” herself. Dear Shannon,

P.S. - A fond farewell to our favorite Carl Fredrickson impersonator... JV, you will definitely be missed. You were the Yin to Chris’ Yang. You instantly increased the sports knowledge of the Fact department. Though, I won’t miss your Tasmanian Devil-style impersonation on the basketball court. You were basically a whirling dervish targeted (usually) right at me. I hope you enjoy yourself back at school. Kansas will be better for having you.

Having worked with designers for a few years now, I would have assumed you understood, despite our vague suggestions otherwise, we do not welcome constructive criticism. I don’t come downstairs and tell you how to send text messages, log onto Facebook and look out of the window. I have amended and attached the poster as per your instructions. Regards, David.

—Madeline

Artist we like:

Shepard fairey

Up until a few years ago, Shepard Fairey was best known in the skateboard and street art worlds for his Obey campaign, a project which Fairey conceived while still a student of the prestigious Rhode Island School of Design in 1989. When Fairey took on a message of hope (and someone else’s art work), we all learned his name.

Fairey’s work is a mixture of graffiti, pop art, business art, art appropriation and Marxist theory. Hit supporters point to the viral nature of his images as well as the DIY-ness of his pieces. His detractors accuse him of selling out (his commercial work for huge corporate brands as well as his clothing line) and exploiting politically charged imagery (the Black Panthers and Obama) to mis-appropriating other artists’ and photographers’ work. During the last presidential election, Fairey’s poster of Obama–a graphic, propagandish piece with the type “hope” in big bold uppercase letters– became a visual moment in American history. New York art critic Peter Schjeldahl called the poster “the most effacious American political illustration since ‘Uncle Sam Wants You.’” Obama went on to win the election. The AP photographer went on to sue. If you know Illustrator, you probably weren’t that impressed with the Obama poster when it started popping up all over MySpace (or were we already on to Facebook?) because you felt someone probably just ran “live trace” on a photo. Looking at the “Obey” poster, you might recognize Andre the Giant. Supposedly, Fairey started the campaign as a joke while helping a friend with a class project. The original “Andre the Giant has a posse” design raised complaints of likeness and copyright infringement. Hence, the new “obey” design. Both the “posse” and “obey” images were stickered, stenciled, and tagged all over the world. Many “posse” parodies were created. Fairey called one of those parody artists a “bottom feeder” and a “parasite.” However, when the AP came after him for not attributing the Obama photo, Fairey said, “If AP photographs that do nothing but depict other artists’ work are protected by fair use, then my

fans The Voice of God

work has to be, too, because it’s at least as transformative, creative and expressive as [the work of the AP].” Supposedly Fairey disclosed to his lawyer that he did base his Obama poster closely on an AP photograph and then trashed the evidence. His lawyer quit. Fairey settled with the photographer. If you’re Madeline, you think the photographer deserved credit. If you’re me, you think Fairey made more than adequate alterations to the image to be able to call it his own. Either way, Fairey not only created the poster, but he also led a grassroots campaign for Obama. He distributed

300,000 stickers and 500,000 posters. Any money donated to Fairey’s organization was used to create more materials for the campaign. In December 2008, Fairey received a thank you letter from Obama. Part of it read, “The political messages involved in your work have encouraged Americans to believe they can change the status-quo. Your images have a profound effect on people.” As Artnet editor Ben Davis writes, “Shepard Fairey has made two artworks that have literally changed the world—or at least, substantially affected public discourse. That’s two more than most artists can claim.” —LV

which led the Yanks to their biggest World Series slump of all-time. After losing to the Dodgers in the 1981 World Series, the Yanks wouldn’t get back to the big show until 1996. In fact they wouldn’t even make the playoffs again ’til 1995. In 1996 a slightly mellowed and humbled Boss hired Joe Torre (of course after a very dramatic off-season where Buck Showalter resigned). The New York press initially hated this pairing with the New York Daily News running a headline that read “Clueless Joe.” However Torre’s calm demeanor proved to be a good fit for Steinbrenner. Torre was able to handle the players he was given while also stroking the Boss’ ego. For the first time ever, a Yankee manager and the Boss could co-exist. Over the next 12 years (the longest tenure of any manager during the Steinbrenner years), the Yankees would go to six World Series—winning four of them. Was he now a perfect owner? Absolutely not. Steinbrenner still meddled and still overpaid for free-agents, but all of a sudden he was a little calmer, a little happier. Of course winning helps that, but the Boss seemed to change. During this last Yankee Dynasty, the Boss created the YES Network. The YES Network continues to fuel the Yankees machine. It provides so much revenue, that the Yankees never even need to sell a ticket before they turn a profit. The Boss was the creative vision behind this network. In 2009, two years after his retirement, the Yankees opened up their new jewel of a stadium. The Boss may have flirted with Manhattan (or even Jersey... blech), but he always wanted the Bombers to remain in the Bronx. How did the Yanks christen their new stadium? In true Boss and Yankees fashion, of course. They won their 27th World Championship. No one will ever look at Goerge Steinbrenner as the perfect owner. But here is what I can tell you. He always gave his teams a chance to win. He invested heavily in his teams (and, yes, overpaid for people; I understand the plight of the smallmarket team, but, if you make more, you should be able to spend more). In an era when so many owners pocket their revenue sharing and cap money, he didn’t. He invested. How many owners in any professional sport give their team a chance to win every year? Not many. The Boss did. He will definitely be missed. Rest in peace, George. —LV

It was a sad day for me when I heard that a truly iconic baseball figure had passed on over this weekend. Bob Sheppard, the long-time iconic voice of the Yankees, passed away at the age of 99 on July 11. This man had seen so many great players take the field over the years, it saddens me that he is no longer with us. In the age of PED’s and sex scandals, Bob Sheppard made me feel closer to the old time baseball my grandparent’s would tell me about. I remember the day in 2007 that Bob Sheppard left his post at Yankee Stadium as he was too weak to do the PA announcements. Hearing another voice call out the batters always just seemed a bit off. Apparently, Derek Jeter felt the same way as he had Bob Sheppard’s voice recorded to always have him announcing his plate appearances. To truly appreciate the longevity and scope of Bob Sheppard’s career, just take a look at the lineup card from his first game. Red Sox

CF: Dom DiMaggio RF: Billy Goodman LF: Ted Williams* 3B: Vern Stephens 1B: Walt Dropo 2B: Bobby Doerr* SS: Lou Boudreau* C: Buddy Rosar P: Billy Wright Yankees

LF: Jackie Jensen SS: Phil Rizzuto* RF: Mickey Mantle* CF: Joe DiMaggio* C: Yogi Berra* 1B: Johnny Mize* 3B: Billy Johnson 2B: Jerry Coleman P: Vic Rashi This game was the debut of Mickey Mantle. *Hall of Famer —DRM

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“Who goes into 7Eleven and asks for the hummus platter?” -Luis

Go, flash, Go! Rich sent this. We think it’s genius. Thanks, Rich!

“That’s a slippery little pickle” -madeline

“....and I want to stay hot so I can get hired anywhere” -vanessa

“It’s just something he picked up to seem less gay” -madeline

“I mean, if I’m Yogi, I’m getting myself checked out” -drm

“She’s too busy bumping other people with it” -madeline

“Can’t you just see a fat vampire wanting to suck that? She’s stupid” -Luis

“I’m putting in the ‘tee hee hee’” -madeline

Long Live America the Beautiful!

—DRM

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Poor Ohio

“To tell the truth, I’m not excited to go to Cleveland, but we have to. If I ever saw myself saying, ‘I’m excited to be going to Cleveland,’ I’d punch myself in the face, because I’m lying.”

First Lebron

I was in Cleveland this past February for work, but as soon as my plane landed I received a text from a friend inviting me to the Cavs game that evening against the Orlando Magic. Not being one to turn down a free ticket, I met my friend in downtown Cleveland and instantly gasped at how busy the streets were. Restaurants and bars were jam-packed, parking lots were at capacity and street vendors were making money hand over fist. Not to mention that this was all happening in the middle of a February snowstorm and on a weeknight. At that moment, I was happy for the city of Cleveland, which for so many years had little to celebrate. For the first time in a long time, Cleveland made positive headlines in the media—all thanks to LeBron James and his ability to play basketball. To set the record straight, I’m not a huge sports fan. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy going to the occasional event, people watching and sipping a warm $8 Coors while I sit in the nose bleed section and squint at the players’ numbers. To be honest I’d rather study the construction and architecture of the arena than concern myself with what is going on inside. Maybe that’s just what happens when you grow up in Cleveland. However, people from all over the world came to see Lebron play. All of a sudden, I was reading about celebrities visiting Cleveland. I have to admit that it was exciting. This was the momentum Cleveland needed to get things moving again, to bring people back downtown, to showcase the city in a positive light. LeBron’s face was plastered all over—even during football season. He was the savior who was going to lead the team to the championships, bring home that trophy, and end the slump. We were all witnesses; it wasn’t a matter of when, but how many titles. Last week all of that came to a crashing halt when LeBron announced on national television that he was leaving for Miami and, truth be told, I couldn’t care less. What I was reminded of on that day was that professional sports are a business—a very big and very lucrative business. A city should never depend on one athlete to carry its team or its economy. At the end of the sports day, all that really matters are the dollar signs in the individual athlete’s bank account. I moved away from Cleveland six years ago. I was able to fit everything I owned into a Honda Civic, which now seems insane as I look around my crowded Brooklyn apartment. When I left, I said my good-byes and drove off without leaving anyone guessing. I wish LeBron had done the same. —Alex Lombardo

Poor JV As long as we’re ragging on Ohio, it’s only fair we take a swipe at Kansas. I mean, come on. Is Ohio really that much worse than some of the Plains States? In their own words, Kansas natives on Urban Dictionary say Kansas is great because: Great Wolf Lodge - indoor waterpark Cabelas and Nebraska Furniture Mart - one’s a huge sporting goods store, the other is like a Walmart times 50

Then Harvey Pekar

In a tough week for Cleveland, their own Harvey Pekar passed away this past Monday. Pekar was a true titan of the comic world. His best known work is the autobiographical American Splendor. The series inspired a critically acclaimed film of the same name. Pekar believed comics could be as impactful as any other literary or visual form. His books were intimate and introspective. They were simply very honest portrayals of everyday life. Here is American Splendor in the words of Pekar: “It’s an autobiography written as it’s happening. The theme is about staying alive. Getting a job, finding a mate, having a place to live, finding a creative outlet. Life is a war of attrition. You have to stay active on all fronts. It’s one thing after another. I’ve tried to control a chaotic universe. And it’s a losing battle. But I can’t let go. I’ve tried, but I can’t.” —LV

Why things aren’t looking up for ohio

—Ichiro Suzuki, 2007:

University of Kansas - selfexplanatory

Then George Steinbrenner

ESPN Green-Lights ‘The Decision’ For 22 More Episodes

No, we’re not being facetious. Steinbrenner really was an Ohio kid. But like all little Ohioans with big dreams (Neil Armstrong, Annie Oakley, Ulysses S. Grant, Alex Lombardo), Steinbrenner left Ohio. To read the full story on how we all benefitted from the life Steinbrenner led, turn the page and read our Yankee propaganda.

BRISTOL, CT—ESPN president George Bodenheimer announced Wednesday that the hour-long program The Decision, a melodrama about NBA superstar LeBron James declaring his intention to join the Miami Heat, has been green-lighted for an additional 22 episodes. “The pilot episode was obviously very gripping, as nearly 10 million people tuned in, but the series is going to have an expanded cast of characters and mostly take place on South Beach,” Bodenheimer said. LeBron will face a number of new decisions every week, like whether or not to save a drowning fan, apply suntan lotion to David Stern’s back, or let one of his teammates chase down a loose ball. Just like the original, each episode will feature an hour of LeBron sitting on his stool and answering questions. Bodenheimer confirmed that either Chris Bosh or Dwyane Wade will likely be killed off.

A lot of AMC theaters, which are cool Russell Stover’s - hella candy KC Zoo - animals and stuff Well, damn. They don’t have chocolate or zoos any place else in the U.S. Thanks, Kansas-ites! (And if you’re curious, “Kansas” is in the Urban Dictionary, not so that residents can defend its cool factor, but because it’s a term for a flat-chested woman.)

America West Airline’s hub is in Columbus state government is now completely dominated by Republicans Fact that Cleveland was the first city in the world to install traffic lights is still a source of pride Also proud of Crew Stadium, the first soccer specific stadium in the U.S. still consider yourself the heart of rock and football You’re ohio.

Poor Ohio

First Lebron

Then Harvey Pekar

Why things aren’t looking up for ohio

—Ichiro Suzuki, 2007:

University of Kansas - selfexplanatory

Then George Steinbrenner

ESPN Green-Lights ‘The Decision’ For 22 More Episodes

Poor Yankee five things What’s on our good friend Dave’s mind

John Daly in the British Open

I love watching him. Every year, I start off thinking he has a real shot. He shows up wearing clown clothes and ripping drives 330. He’s the greatest trainwreck in history. You can’t not watch. I wish I could dress like that when I go to work.

Summer Interns in Summer Dresses on Summer Days

That’s hard to beat.

A better phone

What makes a great owner? Is it someone who is a big fan? Is it someone who invests heavily in the team? Is it someone who upgrades his team’s facilities to be the best in the game? Is it someone who tries to put the best possible product on the field every year? The answer of course is yes to all of the above if you’re the New York Yankees and your owner was George Steinbrenner. George “The Boss” Steinbrenner passed away this past Tuesday at the age of 80. His mark on the Yankees is indelible, and his part in the continued legacy and rebuilding of this great franchise is undeniable. George was born on the Fourth of July in Rocky River, Ohio. He entered the family business of Marine Transit. After a few years, he took a loan from a New York bank and bought the company from his family to run it on his own. He later became part of a group that purchased the American Shipbuilding Company. By 1972 the company’s grosses were more than $100 million annually. An avid sports fans, George went against his family’s wishes and entered the sports franchise business. His first attempt at owning a franchise was the Cleveland Pipers of the ABL. The ABL folded in its second season, but a sports ownership passion had been stoked in Steinbrenner. In 1964 CBS purchased an 80 percent ownership share in the New York Yankees. With this new ownership, the team took a steep decline. With CBS’ reluctance to invest in the team, the Yankees quickly became a bottom tier organization. In 1966 they were in last place for the first time since 1912. With CBS losing money and the Yanks struggling, CBS decided to sell them. In 1973 George Steinbrenner and a group of investors bought the Yankees from CBS for $8.8 million dollars. Within a year, Steinbrenner bought out most of his partners and became

the team’s principle owner. Steinbrenner quickly promised to return the Yankees to their championship past. One of Steinbrenner’s first goals was repairing Yankee stadium. CBS refused to repair the 50-year-old stadium, but Steinbrenner believed they could attract more fans and better players with better facilities. Steinbrenner began the process of upgrading the stadium (with the city’s help). It would take two seasons (both of which the Yanks played in Queen’s eyesore Shea Stadium) but the new Yankee stadium would open at the start of the 1975 season. That wasn’t the only thing new in ’75. That offseason, George started the modern era of free agency by signing Catfish Hunter. Now not everything was always rosey with Steinbrenner. To say he was meddlesome would be putting it mildly. He was always heavy handed with his managers and his GM’s. He also loved pursuing big tickets free agents (he didn’t stop at Catfish). He would seemingly leave no stone unturned in his pursuit to make the Yankees champions again. After losing to the Reds in the ’76 World Series, Steinbrenner decidede he needed another bat. He pilfered from the A’s again and signed away their slugger Reggie Jackson. With the addition of Jackson to a veteran team, the Boss’ dream was realized and the Yankees would win the 1977 and 78 seasons. With the success of those early signings, Steinbrenner would go on to bid on or sign every important free agent. Sometimes it worked greatly, othertimes it was an epic fail (Ricky Henderson, Andy Hawkins, Rick Rhoden, Danny Tartabull). Steinbrenner also would famously trade away young burdeoning talent for over-the-hill late-season additions (who could forget the Jay Buhner for Ken Phelps debacle) and had a tendency to chew up and spit out managers (23 over his first 20 seasons)—all of

Can someone please make a phone that you can hold however you want, runs quickly and isn’t on Sprint?

The World Cup is over I don’t hate soccer. It’s fine, I’ll watch a few games. But I’m not giving up a glorious beach day for it. And the ridiculous mob of tourists at Puma City in New York was out of control.

All I need is some tasty waves and a cool buzz and I’ll be fine The immortal words

of Jeff Spicoli

Where you know dave from Dave Mlne

has contributed to the Dubbs before on matters such as the Mets, Ultimate Beer Pong and the Bacon Explosion.

Artist we like:

Shepard fairey

fans The Voice of God

CF: Dom DiMaggio RF: Billy Goodman LF: Ted Williams* 3B: Vern Stephens 1B: Walt Dropo 2B: Bobby Doerr* SS: Lou Boudreau* C: Buddy Rosar P: Billy Wright Yankees

God haTes nerds!!!

r e oV ed

y a l p

MiGhTy Good

one More nerdy TidBiT

—Madeline

Poor Yankee five things What’s on our good friend Dave’s mind

John Daly in the British Open

Summer Interns in Summer Dresses on Summer Days

That’s hard to beat.

A better phone

Can someone please make a phone that you can hold however you want, runs quickly and isn’t on Sprint?

All I need is some tasty waves and a cool buzz and I’ll be fine The immortal words

of Jeff Spicoli

Where you know dave from Dave Mlne

has contributed to the Dubbs before on matters such as the Mets, Ultimate Beer Pong and the Bacon Explosion.

e r a f ell w

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art dePartment WeeKLY ISSUE 61 VOL. 2

LEBRON JAMES george steinBrenner HARVEY PEKAR shePPard faireY PLuS: John DAVE riCh DAN roBonaut 2

ADW

art department weekly issue 62 vol. 2

Go see this movie. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;LV

pictures pictures pictures pictures PLus: inception 3 things that suck mike giant

mini boArD

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Five things tHe random tHings on tom’s mind (And, yes, that’s Derek Jeter because he’s kind of sort of on Tom’s mind.)

ANNOYING LANDLORDs For people who hold what sound like challenging white-collar jobs and can likely be described as moderately wealthy, my landlords are indescribably empty-headed. Are Amy and I really going to have to move again in 10 months?

“It’s the best nonanimated film I’ve seen in years”

the Dog DAys oF summer

-luis

“fucking BILL WALKER, son”

GRILLING There is something very primitively satisfying about manning a charcoal grill—even if a chimney starter is like cheating (it certainly feels like it, anyway). While Cooklyn has been on a posting hiatus, we’re still eating good in the new ’hood. The latest: chipotle corn burgers, with chipotle mayo. Spicy goodness.

-tom

“What are we gonna do? Just write blah blah blah blah?” -luis

“What’s MTV?” -scrappy

“It was very original—visually inventive”

the rise, cont. If you started imagining the robot takeover when you saw NASA’a Robonaut, have no fear, here comes an exo-skeleton which can help even the score. While only used to help carry things for now, I’m sue we’re well on our way to much more: leaping over buildings, leg pressing tanks... The possibilities are endless —LV HULC EXO-SKELETON READY FOR TESTING, SET TO HIT THE GROUND RUNNING NEXT YEAR By Tim Stevens for endgadget.com

... Since last we heard of the [HULC] it’s been “ruggedized” and made a little more battle-hardy, able to carry 200lbs plus its own 53lb heft without burdening the doughy soldier inside... It supports the cargo plus its own weight ... meaning grunts can haul heavy equipment to the battle and arrive feeling refreshed. ... [HULC is expected to be] hitting the battlefi eld sometime next year. Hooah, future robo-jockeys. —endgadget.com

GuNs Fired one for

the fi rst time last weekend, a 9mm Beretta. I never want to shoot one again.

-luis

greAt minDs Dress Alike... Juicin’ Hey, did you sign up for that Niche fantasy baseball league? It’s still happening. Yeah, me, too. But I just updated my team the other day. While YourSister’sJuicebox is still holding fi rst place after zero (yes, as in “none at all”) moves, Team Madeline was suffering heavily with lack of attention. Half my team was on the DL when I came to check on them. Five changes later and we’re already up fi ve points. Woo... —MV

THE WORLD sERIEs

“I hate the Yankees and I hate the Beatles” -John Byrne

“If you’re gonna be a whore, snacks is where it’s at!” -anthony

“The more chemicals the merrier” -Jennifer d.

THAT THE OTHER TOPICs MAKE ME sOuND MORE MANLY THAN I ACTuALLY AM Seriously, what the

hell? I don’t even know me anymore. Where’s my iPod? I need to queue up that awesome new Kate Nash album...

Every day that passes with a bigger division lead; every time the rotation and bullpen shut down opponents; every time I see another division- or wild-cardleading foe look like pushovers, I start to think the Braves are going to send off Bobby Cox in style. I don’t want to get ahead of myself, but... BravesYanks, the three-quel?

Artist We like:

mike giAnt

n i A br eD

One of my faves! A sick graffi ti artist and illustrator known for sketching entirely in Sharpie markers without the aid of pencil sketches or drafts. His unique subject matter, consisting of fl ash (tattoo) art, West Coast babes, snakes, skulls and letters are at the top of their class and his Sharpie medium gives him a hands-on style that is immediately recognizable. If you’ve ever attempted to draw with a Sharpie, you know from personal experience that it requires a great deal of skill to produce the fi delity of line work that’s evident in Giant’s pieces. Sharpie markers to the unskilled artist bleed the second that the fl ow of motion is disrupted in forming a fl uid line. After close inspection of one of Mike’s illustrations or hand-drawn typesets, you really appreciate the level of control and detail the man can achieve with a marker. The photos attached are a step by step process of one of Mike’s illustrations done with the aid of a light-box and Sharpies. Enjoy! —Anthony

h s A W

picture this Usually, at the Dubbs, we let the submissions and the ebb and fl ow of the week reveal a theme. This week, we decided to put together the ADW Photo Issue. Well, Madeline decided. She needed a break from editing my verbose pieces. Normally, we get a handful of pics every week. This week we got nearly triple what we normally get. Quite a few came from Rich as he traverses the internet to fi nd awesomeoness every week. We also received photos of Henry from Meghan and Lilly, Jessica’s neice (that’s the cover). We also peppered in the obligatory images of Kal and Megan. Photography is not just a fad for the week here at the Dubbs. It’s a way of life. In Casa Vega we usually have soft boxes set up in the dining room. I like to think we’re never too far away from our next photo shoot. Whether it be the family on our new grey chair, updating headshots for Kal, pictures for our Christmas card, tonight’s meal, or pictures of my latest toys, there’s always a picture being taken. In fact one of the shoots that happens annually in Casa Vega is the Top 10 Toys of the Year. Pictured above is this year’s shot. Instead of doing individual pictures, we went with one large group shot. I think it’s awesome. One day it might make it up on my blog. Snap, we’re half way through 2010—time to start brainstorming the 2011 shoot. I personally love photography, but more than that I love my favorite photographer, Madeline. She’s insanely talented, innovative and creative. Three

years ago she made me the happiest man on the planet. I love her dearly. Happy Anniversary, my love. Here’s to creating many more beautiful photographs. Besides the photographs, we have the next installment of “Artists We Like.” This week Anthony shares his thoughts on Mike Giant, a man after my own heart with his lightbox and Sharpies. We also have a page on things that suck. You know what doesn’t suck? Inception. If you still have those free movie tickets from Niche, now’s the time to go. I could fi ll a whole page here with my thoughts on how amazing Inception is, but Madeline doesn’t have the time to craft a review that is as marvelous as the movie. It’s so good. I can’t wait to see it again. A seriously ingenious and highly inventive fi lm.

I have a love/hate relationship with the Sports Guy Bill Simmons. Of late is has been more hate/hate, but who’s counting? In reading his latest mailbag, he did offer some brilliant advice. —LV Q: I have a 13 year-old daughter. Despite my best efforts to raise her surrounded by quality music, movies and entertainment, she still walks around singing Journey songs and going to Robert [Pattinson] movies. My question to you is, what will you do when your kids become Lakers’ fans? —John Klossner, So. Berwick, Maine sG: Disown them. And then disown myself. When my kids were babies, I thought about holding Yankees hats and Lakers hats over their heads in their crib, then pinching them until they started crying (to condition them to instinctively hate their logos/colors). Then I realized that was barbaric and would probably get me thrown in jail. Still, if your kids root for teams you hate, that means you’ve failed as a parent and you should probably just give the kids away and try again.

Feel the love

Scrappy with Darth Maul. Scrappy with Ahsoka. Scrappy with one of the Brooklyn Cyclones mascots. (Can you guess which inspired her to write stories?)

Pam bids JV farewell.

Henry in an awesome shirt.

Kal dresses like a big boy.

Henry... Oh, Henry.

It’s not a photobomb, but it’s close.

Kal eats the shampoo bottle.

Feel the love

Scrappy with Darth Maul. Scrappy with Ahsoka. Scrappy with one of the Brooklyn Cyclones mascots. (Can you guess which inspired her to write stories?)

Pam bids JV farewell.

Henry in an awesome shirt.

Kal dresses like a big boy.

Henry... Oh, Henry.

It’s not a photobomb, but it’s close.

Kal eats the shampoo bottle.

photo issue Who needs all that text?

Not that I don’t enjoy editing the Dubbs, but the past couple issues left me feeling like I deserved some sort of award for achievement in editing. Maybe I wrote too much for them. Whatever the case, I wanted a break this issue. It was supposed to be just photos. Then LV started sending me real text. As of 10 minutes ago, I just gave him a flat out no when he said he wanted to include a review of Inception. Inception is a brilliant movie and everyone should go see it, but no there is no room in this issue for ediitng that review. I wanted short short text and lots of pictures. (Thanks, Anthony!) What more needs to be said? —Madeline

Lilly

Those giraffes’ children are probably so ashamed.

Lilly

Little Big Planet is awesome.

My cat is strange.

photo issue Who needs all that text?

Lilly

Those giraffes’ children are probably so ashamed.

Lilly

Little Big Planet is awesome.

My cat is strange.

Batman loft

DC comics in your face

From the archive of “Things Rich Sent” comes this intriguing piece of apartment art. I love Superman, but I’m not about recreate Metropolis or Smallville—no matter how awesome the style of the Bruce Timm’s WB series. Scratch that. Madeline is typing this. I would totally decorate this way.

I want this book! For now I have to be content to go to http://dcu.blog.dccomics.com and salivate while the creators describe how they create the amazing pages based on iconic comic art. Even if you don’t like comics, you’ll appreciate the ingenuity.

Things that suck Art exhibits Luckily for all you dear readers, the Dubbs is now regularly a week late. This means that there is time to include my thoughts and opinions on an exhibit I saw this past weekend at the Brooklyn Museum—a photo exhibit that sucked. As we left the 4th Floor, I said, “Oh wait. I should have gotten that guy’s name,” because I knew I wanted to tell the world that this guy blows. And LV said, “It’s fine; it’ll be online.” But it’s not. You know why? Because he sucks. The entrance to the 4th Floor is decorated with photographs that seem vaguely familiar. Some are recognizable as advertisements, others are iconic magazine images. None were taken by the artist who is getting all the credit here. How is this possible? He took the time to remove the text from the images. Isn’t that museum-quality art? (Couldn’t he have just tracked down the original photographers or photo editors to get a clean image?) Then he assembled the group to make a statement about African American life. Yeah.

republic falls on hard time$ A gun-toting man wearing a Darth Vader mask and cape robbed a Setauket bank Thursday morning, police said. The man fled after the robbery of the Chase bank at 4080 Route 347, Suffolk police said. Darth Vader needs a gun? The Republic needs cash?

As I loudly declared that this “artist” sucks, I also stated that the curator probably deserved most of the credit because it is after all the assembly of images that makes the statement. Wait. I have just crossed some threshold wherein I as an editor who decides the order and cuts the text for all the pieces that we gather from other sources online somehow makes me an artist... Anyway, that guy sucks and that’s why you can’t find a listing for his exhibition in the Brooklyn Museum monthly pamphlet or online. Next thing you know, these jackasses in the adjecent story will also be known as fine artists with exhibitions. I love you, imaging people, but removing text (and color correcting) not art. Though, if your job becomes outsourced... —MV

Done images Not only does the name of this company suck, but they sound like the next publishing job to be outsourced to India. I received an email most likely because I have a portfolio on some lame site where photographers do not own or do not know how to use Photoshop. On the homepage, the “Image Retouching” example is the most ridiculous, but it doesn’t appear elsewhere for closer inspection—unlike the example to the left. Shot some fancy models on a tennis court that wasn’t so fancy? Never fear, Done Images is here! “We are currently working with around half a dozen Clients in U.S, UK, and Europe,” boasts the company email. Really? Six? You have six clients across two continents. The rest of the email also sucks. Maybe someday we’ll update the Dubbs online to include it. Oh, look, I have some more room. They don’t just retouch at Done Images, they specify “Beauty retouching, Skin retouching, Face retouching, Body retouching.” Also, “Conversions to mono” and “Creative dodging/ burning” (for those times when mundane dodging and burning won’t do). Man, these people suck.

Those skin ads This was the first male version I had ever seen. And it’s just as disturbing as the any version with a woman’s face with it’s ridiculous magic eraser revealing a younger face under all the wrinkles. Do people who have no idea how to process a photo for publication that snake oil really is making that dude look younger? Do regular people not realize that both halves are from “after” pictures? Omg I hate these ads... —MV

Batman loft

DC comics in your face

Artist We like:

mike giAnt

n i A br eD

h s A W

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Five things tHe random tHings on tom’s mind (And, yes, that’s Derek Jeter because he’s kind of sort of on Tom’s mind.)

“It’s the best nonanimated film I’ve seen in years”

the Dog DAys oF summer

-luis

“fucking BILL WALKER, son”

-tom

“What are we gonna do? Just write blah blah blah blah?” -luis

“What’s MTV?” -scrappy

“It was very original—visually inventive”

GuNs Fired one for

the fi rst time last weekend, a 9mm Beretta. I never want to shoot one again.

-luis

THE WORLD sERIEs

“I hate the Yankees and I hate the Beatles” -John Byrne

“If you’re gonna be a whore, snacks is where it’s at!” -anthony

“The more chemicals the merrier” -Jennifer d.

THAT THE OTHER TOPICs MAKE ME sOuND MORE MANLY THAN I ACTuALLY AM Seriously, what the

hell? I don’t even know me anymore. Where’s my iPod? I need to queue up that awesome new Kate Nash album...

ADW

art department weekly issue 62 vol. 2

Go see this movie. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;LV

pictures pictures pictures pictures PLus: inception 3 things that suck mike giant

From JV I guess I’ve been putting this off long enough, but I really have no idea how even to begin to write about what the last 9 months have meant to me at 100 Church. You always remember your first…real job out of college, and I’m kind of just sitting here in front of a blank screen trying to figure out how to articulate what I’m feeling. Here goes… “What do you mean interview me again?” That was the politest sentence of my first conversation with Megan Reda last October. I’d just given my notice at the company I’d been working part-time at in anticipation of starting at Niche when HR called me to conduct an additional interview. I thought I was golden (hence the quitting before signing anything – lesson learned), so my tone with her was less than pleasant. This oversight on my part (you don’t yell at HR) meant I’d be coming back to Niche for an extra interview with THE Pam McNally, herself. I survived that, and after essentially the most stressful week of waiting in my life, I started at Niche on October 19, 2009. I knew Liz because her boyfriend had been one of my best friends since middle school and we’d kind of hung out just enough for it not to be awkward, but other than that, I knew absolutely nothing about what I was getting myself into. “Hamptons magazine? OK, sounds good.” As Chris talked about in his note (which brought me to the brink of tears, Chris. Thank you…you’ve become like a brother to me), I became fast friends with everyone in Fact. The department accepted me as one of their own immediately and unconditionally, and for that I don’t even know how to begin to thank each of you. From day one, Lizzie was welcoming, Chris (though strangely intimidating – he grilled me during my first interview and demanded to know who my favorite jazz musician was) was happy for male companionship, Meghan was immediately ready to talk music and culture and Marina was…Marina (my favorite girl). Luis was in many ways the first face of Niche for me – he was immediately interested in who I was, what I was about, and how he could use the presence of an extra dude in the office to his advantage for planning bball games and writing about sports for the Dubbs. My 10th day at work wound up being Halloween and I made my first trip to Biddy’s for Tom’s birthday party (At

I wanted to get rid of the red-eye but I’m not really good at that kind of stuff... So Liz and I kind of look like aliens. But here’s proof of our inter-department love anyway! —Lauren

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the time, I had no idea who Tom was… only that I played beer pong against him and Luis), and I got to experience the people at Niche outside of the office for the first time. It was so great to see everyone release from the stresses of the workday together. It quickly became a joy to come to work because I was in a unique place where I wasn’t just “friendly” with my office mates – some of them were becoming some of my best friends in and outside of the office. “Who else spends the weekends with the people they work with?” I asked myself, and who knew those weekend nights would come to include trips to the Hamptons, beach houses in Long Beach Island, drunken walks to Point Pleasant and sleepovers in Brooklyn after too much gin. Within the Fact department and elsewhere, I was developing strong relationships that helped me improve – both as an employee and a person. Events like Ludachristmas and Richmas lived up to the hype and, slowly but surely, I managed to form a relationship (or at least know) every person at the office. In the face of pressure from Pam, I even got Fashion to put up with me. I remember yelling over to Tom at around 10:30 PM on the first Thursday of Hamptons season with the Power List sitting on my desk half-checked. “This is not OK,” I whined. In reality, though, Hamptons season was, for many reasons, my favorite time at Niche. It was always moving and I always had something (usually too many things) to do, but I also found myself becoming part of a somewhat-well-oiled machine. Rather than working three months in advance, I got to see the fruits of my

labor every Friday. The horror of staying after work on Thursday nights was mollified by loud music and a feeling of shared achievement. The eight issues of Hamptons I had the opportunity to work on were really special. As my time wound down, my last week felt like a parade of incredible people spoiling me with unbelievably kind gestures of friendship that won’t soon be forgotten. When I first got into grad school, people asked me if I’d be sad to leave my job. “I guess,” I usually said, “But (given the nature of factchecking), I’ll be doing the same thing on my first day that I did on my last one.” While that is sort of true (I checked The List on my last day), EVERYTHING else was completely different. I’m so lucky to have had the pleasure and privilege of sharing the last few months with all of you. Please come visit…Please. I know that the eventual night is coming when I’ll have a few hundred pages to read, it’s snowing and freezing on the plains, and I’ll be wishing I was at my desk checking Unzipped or Dish. Your collective impact on my life won’t be soon (or ever) forgotten, and I’m bringing every kind word, hug, note, and memory with me. The sap (and music writer) in me require some kind of parting lyrics, so here’s “In My Life.” The Fab Four really lay it on thick, but every word rings true. There are places I remember All my life though some have changed Some forever not for better Some have gone and some remain All these places had their moments With lovers and friends I still can recall Some are dead and some are living In my life I’ve loved them all.

comic con from JV liz’s things Sperman saves the day PLus: more keanu converse cheeseburger cody

mini BoArD

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FiVE THinGS the random thIngS on lIZ’S mInd

I’m obsessed with DoLPhins

Yesterday I was walking down West B’Way and suddenly I turn the corner and on the side of the street there were 20 life-sized animal fLoAtAtion Devises ... literally a huge zebra and whale. And, I just wanted to know, where in Tribeca is there a pool large enough to use all these? And can I go on my lunch break?

“I know he said the fourth before, but I actually think it’s on the fifth. We’re also playing the borgata on the third”

BooKWorm

-John oates (yes from hall & oates)

Adele Enersen puts all new mothers to shame with her “hobby” http://milasdaydreams. blogspot.com/ Not just another Anne Geddes, this fun site is worth peeping.

“She’s shaped like an M&M” -luis

“I have thingies on my butt. I think I have bed bugs on my chair”

The Jersey shore premiers tonight, and I just read Snooki’s profile in the NY Times ... not sure what the fact that Snooki is in the NY Times says about our society.

-fryda

EAT iT After telling the research director here at Maxim about my previous experiences in the Niche Nugget Challenge, the Dozen Krispy Kreme Donuts Challenge and the 25 Munchkins Challenge, I found the following poll on the Maxim Facebook page: in a single sitting, which of the following could you eat the most of?

FEELin’ FoXY Is Megan Fox trying to make nice for Transformers (1 and 2) as well as bombs Jennifer’s Body and Jonah Hex by dressing nerdy. How else to explain the black framed glasses and Voltron T-shirt. I don’t know... Maybe I’m just looking for an excuse to run a picture of Megan Fox.

Hot dogs: 9% Doughnuts: 20% Cheeseburgers: 9% Pizza slices: 44% Ice cream sandwiches: 12% Other (please comment): 6% Select comments: watermelon, I could eat a whole watermelon to myself! :) Pf Changs or pizza or a Cheeseburger Steak burritos..hands down!

“Sumo is a virgin” -fryda

“It can’t even be considered a party without you” -meghan

“Sumo is a virgin” -fryda

“Excuse me! Stroller Lady! Why are you wearing rain boots?” -junior high boys

Do you think it’s ok to drink water out of that little spout if the WAter thAt Comes out of the Big sPout is BroWn?

I really dont understand the appeal of mirAnDA kerr. JV and Chris are obsessed ... I just don’t think she’s that cute. Although it was pretty great when the Ocean Drive with her on the cover fell over and squashed JV’s Phish paper dolls.

SUPErmAn SAVES THE DAY... (TAKE THAT BATMAN)

In the nick of time, the Man of Steel saved a family’s home... for real. A couple facing foreclosure found the collateral they desperately needed with the discovery of an Action Comics #1 in their basement. As any true fanboy knows, Action Comics #1 is the most significant comic of all time because it was Superman’s debut—and the birth of the entire genre of the superhero. The fortuitous find occurred when the anonymous family began the painful process of packing up their home due to a bank’s foreclosure proceedings. The house had been in the family’s possession since the 1950s, which is

i WAnT! These awesome DC Converse were unveiled during Comic Con. They can be purchased from Journeys. Available not only in Superman, but also in Green Lantern and Batman as well.

probably when the wife’s father stashed the issue in a box with some other, mere mortal titles. When the family first realized what they had found, they contacted Stephen Fishler, co-owner of New York’s ComicConnect and Metropolis Collectibles. “They said they came across a box that had magazines in it and some old comic books,” Fishler told Asylum.com. “And that they came across what appears to be an Action #1.” Fishler points out that “99.9 percent” of similar calls he receives turn out to be about reprints, so at first he was dubious. “They took a cell phone picture of the book and texted it to me, and I realized it was an Action #1,” he says. Fishler is no stranger to the Holy Grail of titles, having brokered the recordbreaking sale of an Action #1 in February (for $1 million), only to break that record a month later by selling another copy for $1.5 million. This copy will go on display at this weekend’s Comic-Con in San Diego, where it will also be officially graded. Fishler figures it will garner a VG+ (Very Good) rating and should fetch upwards of $250,000 when it goes up for auction on ComicConnect. Asylum was able to get a reaction from the owner (who wants to remain anonymous), who said through Fishler that the family was “still a little shellshocked about finding this book. I was so nervous when I realized what it was worth. I know I am very fortunate, but I will be greatly relieved when this book finds a new home.” Thankfully, it looks like they’ll get to keep theirs.

D A S nU

KEA

rEALLY? Can you believe Terrence “Cheeseburger” Cody is a paid NFL defensive player? Can you imagine this guy trying to run down Chris Johnson or Adrian Peterson? Only if they had a coupon to McDonalds.

imPorTAnT nEWS This week’s Dubbs brings you a look at the goings on at Comic Con 2010. The center spread is chock full of all the movies, games, TV shows, toys and (oh yeah) a few books to look out for the rest of this year as well as summer 2011. On the subject of summer 2011, has there ever been as anticipated a summer for the geeks? You have long-awaited releases for Green Lantern starring this week’s cover Ryan Reynolds (thanks for picking that, Madeline...) and the above pictured Blake Lively, Captain America and Thor. Those three along with Suckerpunch, and Cowboys vs. Aliens should have comic fans coming out in droves. “Artist We Like” takes a break this week. In our attempt to catch up on the issue as a whole (are we two weeks behind now?), we’re sacrifing the research needed to express why Jim Hensen is so amazing. The series will continue next week—hopefully with two installments. In the meantime, get creative with the the very handy “Sad Keanu” cut out from Rich. Please cut it out (only after youv’e read the whole issue) and send us your best Sad Keanu pics for future issues of the Dubbs.

Liz from Fact lets us in on the Five Things occupying real estate in her mind. I of course disagree with her greatly and agree with Chirs and JV on the beauty of Miranda Kerr. On that subject, I sadly have to let everyone know she is now off the market. She married Orlando Bloom (really, what has Legolas done recently?) after he knocked her up. Last but not least, JV checks in with a heartfelt good-bye to Niche.

This thing is awesome! -Rich

comic con Comic Con started as the biggest comic book convention on the planet, but has morphed into the place to build buzz for TV shows, movies and video games. While this year’s Comic Con (always in San Diego) was again overrun by big reveals for TV, movie and gaming properties, this time they mostly had a comic book tie or twist. The early news from Comic Con was all abuzz with Alan Moore’s announcement (via wire—no way Alan the Great would show) that DC had reached out to offer him the rights back to Watchmen in exchange for sequels and prequels to the property. Moore declined and responded by restating, “I don’t care what they do with it; I don’t even own a copy of it ... anymore.” Dan Didio and Jim Lee (DC’s Editorial Directors) confirmed the story and that new Watchmen stories were not out of the question. Marvel then made a huge splash by confirming nerd-god Joss Whedon as

the director of 2012’s Avengers movie. Joss then confirmed that Mark Ruffalo would replace Ed Norton as Bruce Banner/Hulk, Jeremy Renner would pull the bow as Hawkeye, and joked that Nathan Fillion would play AntMan. (Nathan announced via twitter the next day that he thinks Joss was joking.) Marvel Entertainment also had great props from next summer’s Thor movie. They unveiled Thor’s helmet as well a huge Asgardian display with the Destroyer armor. DC countered the Marvel movie news by unveiling the first official footage of next summer’s Green Lantern in flight (that shirtless guy on the cover). Convention goers were wowed, but sadly the footage hasn’t hit the net yet. DC also displayed the body of Abin Sur from the movie as well as premiered the individual character posters for the film. Blake Lively’s arrival (she plays Carol Fenriss) caused such an uproar that audience members started stabbing one another in

the eye for seats (true story). Zack Snyder’s SuckerPunch also premiered footage at the convention. The trailer was amazing. Samurai swords, Nazis, dragons, explosions, and barelydressed babes. I’m ready to watch this movie right now. In small screen news, Marvel and DC both made huge announcements. A series of Marvel Anime animated movies were announced. They will premiere on G4 and then be made available via DVD. The first Anime will feature Iron-Man. DC then showed the first footage of their Young Justice Cartoon Network animated series. This series looks amazing. Stylized takes on the Teen Titans mentored by a 16 member Justice League? Sign me up. DC also announced that the brilliant Grant Morrison/Frank Quitely story All-Star Superman would be the next direct-toDVD animated release. They also stated that they will continue to do animated shorts before their releases which will

feature more obscure DC characters. The Spectre and Jonah Hex have already been released with Black Canary and Oracle to be featured in subsequent releases. Hasbro also jumped in on the act and showed the first footage of their new G.I. Joe Renegades cartoon which will premiere on their new station The Hub this fall. In the realm of video games, DC blew away the competition with its trailer for DCUO. This game has been in the works for three years now and looks like it has been worth the wait. Jim Lee and the boys at Wildstorm designed every character in DC’s vast library for this PS3 exclusive. The characters look amazing, and the gameplay looks great. DC also announced plans for their Green Lantern movie based game as well as a very adult take on the Suicide Squad (Geoff Johns is writing the script for the game). Marvel countered with announcements for Marvel Capcom 3 as well as a Thor

movie game (yawn). There surprisingly wasn’t a ton of breaking comic news at Comic Con. DC announced the integration of Bruce Wayne back into the bat family with the teambook Batman Inc. (Two Batmans?) The brilliant JH Williams III previewed his first issue of BatWoman (very excited for his visual take on this character). The Superman family will welcome Chloe Sullivan (of Smallville series fame) into the fold. She will have a huge story with Jimmy Olsen playing out over the coming year. Marvel announced a modernized take on the thunder god with Ultimate Thor. Marvels biggest announcement came on Day 4 when they announced they had acquired the rights to all of CrossGen comics. Could more Sojourn (by Marvel-exclusive Greg Land) and Meridian (by also exclusive Steve McNiven) be far behind. Top Shelf announced plans for the next League of Extraordinary Gentleman stories

by Alan Moore. This one titled 1969. IDW broke news of their partnership with John Byrne and their publishing of new issues of his underrated Next Men. Besides the obligatory looks at the Captain America and Thor movie figures there wasn’t a lot of exciting toy news. DC showed off all sorts of new Green Lantern toys from Mattel that have been already done by DC Direct (wtf?). The best DC Direct preview was a Joker Black and White statue in the style of Lee Bermejo. Mattel had the toy preview I was most excited about. They’ll be releasing WWE Legends figures of not only Demolition, but also the Macho Man Randy Savage. I’m now saving my pennies for both. So there it is. Not too many earthshaking announcements, but some exciting news nonetheless. I must say, it was refreshing to see the movie and gaming previews be more comic based than in years past. Who knows, maybe next year I’ll actually make it to San Diego.

SUPErmAn SAVES THE DAY... (TAKE THAT BATMAN)

i WAnT! These awesome DC Converse were unveiled during Comic Con. They can be purchased from Journeys. Available not only in Superman, but also in Green Lantern and Batman as well.

D A S nU

KEA

This thing is awesome! -Rich

mini BoArD

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FiVE THinGS the random thIngS on lIZ’S mInd

I’m obsessed with DoLPhins

“I know he said the fourth before, but I actually think it’s on the fifth. We’re also playing the borgata on the third”

BooKWorm

-John oates (yes from hall & oates)

Adele Enersen puts all new mothers to shame with her “hobby” http://milasdaydreams. blogspot.com/ Not just another Anne Geddes, this fun site is worth peeping.

“She’s shaped like an M&M” -luis

“I have thingies on my butt. I think I have bed bugs on my chair”

The Jersey shore premiers tonight, and I just read Snooki’s profile in the NY Times ... not sure what the fact that Snooki is in the NY Times says about our society.

-fryda

“Sumo is a virgin” -fryda

“It can’t even be considered a party without you” -meghan

“Sumo is a virgin” -fryda

“Excuse me! Stroller Lady! Why are you wearing rain boots?” -junior high boys

Do you think it’s ok to drink water out of that little spout if the WAter thAt Comes out of the Big sPout is BroWn?

I wanted to get rid of the red-eye but I’m not really good at that kind of stuff... So Liz and I kind of look like aliens. But here’s proof of our inter-department love anyway! —Lauren

ADW

art department weekly issue 63 vol. 2

comic con from JV liz’s things Sperman saves the day PLus: more keanu converse cheeseburger cody

ADW

art department weekly issue 64 vol. 2

Cheer up, Keanu

Fact: Putting Sad Keanu on any Little People toys makes for a really funny picture. That and having a baby creep around trying to grab him also makes for photo gold. Enjoy, and remember to cut out your Keanu and take pictures for future issues of the Dubbs.

comic con from JV lizâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s things Sperman saves the day PLus: more keanu converse cheeseburger cody

mini BoArD

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LOVE I have learned Meghan loves

“Plus I covet JGL’s wardrobe”

anything with pigs or VW logos. HATE It still makes me giggle that

she thought I hated her after her initial interview. At that time it was just me and Cindi on the mag; my days were not filled with sunshine and rainbows. So Meghan, it wasn’t you; it really was me

-tom

men Who Dress AliKe The trend in men donning similar shirts and pants continues this week. If they are not calling each other the night before (you know Bosh always appreciates DRM’s input...), then there must be something in the water to create a psychic connection. Just a little bit of a height difference here… —DRM It happened again.

—Rich

“I thought all you wore were pants and sweater vests” -dave

“I’m bringing creepy back” -rich

“If I didn’t want to spend $25 on new jeans, why would I want to spend that on olive oil?” -madeline

“I don’t understand what this is. It’s a robe you wear backwards?” -british man at cyclones Snuggie game

“It does look like a cover for the Advocate” -kathy

i’m loVin’ it T he photo I swapped on Jess’ desk happened to match perfectly with what she got for lunch. —Rich

tAKe A Bite... ..out of crime! If Ace the Bat-hound looked like this, we would remember him.

“You have a national parade and yet you have no nation” -Jimmy

J-sCHOOL Meghan went to journalism school. Don’t question it. REFREsHING Her need for Dunkin’ Donuts iced coffee is unparalleled.

THE sPOON A few months ago Meghan started saying we need to use a spoon to scoop out goodies. She has Henry now and kids get sick all the time so you need to use a spoon so we don’t get germs. Meghan calling me “Captain call out” before I even get to turn around to acknowledge what she is talking about. Last call out... Coming back from the gym and then eating whatever snack is on the counter right after you come back.... I love you Meghan :) Having girls nights and having champagne. ’Nough said... Her rocker kicks And who can forget her consistancy in yelling at Luis and Anthony for not letting me in the spanish club Rubbing it in my face when the Cardinals beat the Mets Meghan, It has been a great few years. You will never be forgotten and I hope to see you when I finally make a trip to Chicago. Best of luck to you Jeremy and Henry. Safe travels! And you will be missed —Jessica

sPORTs Her obsessions with the St. Louis Cardinals runs almost as deep as my loyalties the the Steelers (I know, I know different sports.) But chicks who dig sports are just cooler than the rest of world, so they must stick together. Sorry, but it’s a scientific fact.

BONus THING! Meghan is by far my most favorite fellow commuter. Whether it was driving in to work in the Bentley (yes, I’m still sorry for making that wrong turn and going the wrong way on the one-way street in South Orange) or chugging beers hidden in paper bags on the way to Maplewood, you make Jersey tolerable. I don’t know what I’m going to do without you.....

on the WeB...

I suscribe to this dating newsletter (funny, i know) and thought this was a great one for all the ladies) I have edited these tips from Paige Parker.

s i W ... r o F

pAiGes 6 tips For loVinG A mAn Without losinG YourselF

Ah, summertime outdoor concerts. Last weeks was Weezer in Williamsburg, so in honor of that band, that locale and the Dubs itself, I present my list of all the “W” bands I could think of, in my order of preference. Ive only had the pleasure of seeing 8 of them live (marked with an asterisk). How bout you?

meGhAn & muppets

the selF pleAsurinG pAnDA Did you like the Masturbating Bear on Conan... if the answer is yes, than you’ll love the Self Pleasuring Panda. Due to legal troubles with NBC, Conan had to change the Masturbating Bear into a Panda for his recent comedy tour. I can’t help but laugh whenever I see it.

Weezer* Who, The Wings White Stripes, The Wailers, The Wu-Tang Clan, The Wilco* Ween Whitesnake* White Zombie* White Lion* WASP* Wham Warrant* Winger* Waitresses, The War Wallflowers, The Wild Cherry West Coast Revival When in Rome Wolfmother Waterboys, The Wang Chung Wolf Parade Wilson-Phillips ~Karen

Most of my mornings at Niche started the same way. I’d come in, usually the second person in the office, and shout over the wall to the first person always there Meghan. We’d have our daily baseball banter. Mine slanted around the Yanks, hers geared toward her beloved Cardinals. This happened everyday, and I loved it. In fact, I think it’s safe to say that Meghan was the first official face of Niche for me. She’s the person who first interviewed me. Then after the interview, we sat in the reception area and talked for a good 10 more minutes. Not about work, simply about life. I remember going home and telling Madeline what a good vibe I got from Niche, but also how nice this Meghan was. Once I started, not much changed. Meghan continued to be one the of nicest people I’ve ever met. Not only that, but she was incredibly determined and hard-working. Who can forget Meghan steadfastly working until her due date. I thought she was crazy, but she did it, always with a smile on her face. Then she had her little man Henry, and (once she returned from maternity leave) our morning conversations not only covered baseball but our kids. If there’s one thing Meghan is, it’s passionate. She’s passionate about her family, she’s passionate about baseball (even if it is all skewed through her Cardinals tinted glasses), she’s passionate about her hate for the Yankees (who can forget her Phillies in 5

chants at Tom’s birthday party... pictured below) and she’s passionate about her work. She’s immensely talented and easily one of the nicest people I’ve ever met in publishing. She’s is very special and unique in this wacky world of publishing. She will be missed by us here on the East Coast. Our loss is the midwest’s gain. In honor of Meghan, and in continuing our Artist We Like series, we feature one of Meghan’s heroes, Jim Hensen. We also have pieces on bands that start with W, relationship advice from Vicky (really Paige Parker.. no relation to Peter), more Sad Keanus, Richs web finds, and a Self Pleasuring Panda.

1. DON’T BELIEVE THE “YOU COMPLETE ME” MYTH “My other half,” or “my BETTER half”... You hear people refer to their significant others that way all the time. It may seem harmless but this is troublesome thinking. That’s because if you truly believe that you’re just half of a person until you meet the soulmate that will make you whole, you are setting yourself up for a lifetime of disappointment. 2. DON’T BE A “YES” WOMAN If you think that agreeing with everything your man says, replying “whatever you think honey,” or “I dunno...what do YOU want to do?” makes you easygoing and appealing... THINK AGAIN. 3. RECOGNIZE ALL OF THE GREAT QUALITIES THAT YOU BRING TO THE RELATIONSHIP Its easy to make yourself feel small in a relationship when you put your boyfriend on a pedestal and think, “hes so wonderful...what could he possibly see in a woman like me?” 4. HAVE YOUR OWN LIFE In the moment, it may make you feel good to spend every minute with your boyfriend (even tagging along to poker night with the guys, uninvited), but trust me, this is just a quick fix that will only undermine your chances for real security. If you really want a solid relationship, you have to make yourself a priority and have your own life. 5. DONT MAKE PLANS OUT OF CONTINGENCY, JEALOUSY, FEAR OR SPITE If youre making plans with your friends just as a contingency or out of jealousy, fear, or spite he will see through it and your plans will backfire. Guaranteed. 6. DONT OBSESS ABOUT PERFECTION Nobodys perfect, so dont expect your relationship to be! –VicKy

on the WeB...

I suscribe to this dating newsletter (funny, i know) and thought this was a great one for all the ladies) I have edited these tips from Paige Parker.

s i W ... r o F

pAiGes 6 tips For loVinG A mAn Without losinG YourselF

meGhAn & muppets

Artist we like:

jim henson

Puppets were on TV before Jim Henson, but we never saw them the way we do now until he revolutionized the field. For a kid who wanted to be famous on TV, Henson certainly left an impression on us as an artist we like. Maybe you’ve never seen Dark Crystal or Fraggle Rock. Maybe you refused to watch Sesame Street when you were younger. Maybe you don’t know this, but Muppets are awesome. Before Muppets, there were puppets on TV made of wood and controlled with marionette strings. Kids loved them, but, seriously, marionettes are creepy. And things like Howdy Doody scare me a little. Henson began working in puppetry at this point in puppet history. While still in high school, he began creating puppets for a Saturday morning children’s show on local D.C. television. After high school, Henson attended University of Maryland, thinking that he might become a commercial artist. But he was drawn back to puppets with a class offered in the applied arts department. This

introduction to the craft and textiles led to his degree in home economics. (A home-ec major. I had to include that.) As a freshman, he was asked to create Sam and Friends, a five-minute puppet show for WRC-TV. The characters on Sam and Friends would be recognizable to us as his most famous Muppets, including Kermit the Frog. Henson believed that television puppets needed to have more life and sensitivity. Marionettes have jerky movements and no range of emotions. Henson began making his characters from flexible fabric-covered foam rubber. He also used rods to move the puppets arms, allowing a greater control of expression. Henson wanted the muppet characters to “speak” more creatively than previous puppets, which had

Rowlf, the first muppet; Dinosaurs, that ABC sit-com; Fraggle Rock; Gonzo’s people; lots of muppets, Burt and Ernie; the original Sesame Street gang.

seemed to have random mouth movements; he used precision mouth movements to match the dialogue. Henson also began experimenting with techniques that would change the way in which puppetry was used on television, such as using the frame defined by the camera shot to allow the puppeteer to work from off-camera. Once the camera focuses in on these creatures who move in a believable manner, it’s hard—even for adults—not to forget that there is a person somewhere behind the scenes doing all the work. The wild array of creations that make up the Muppet family is impressive in itself. And I do mean wild. Think of just the Sesame Street family and its core of monsters, plus some “people” who seem to be missing key human features, a gigantic yellow bird, a wooly mammothinspired imaginary friend, and then some aliens. You start to forget about the voices, which seemed to have all been done by Henson and Frank Oz.

When Henson’s life came to a sudden conclusion in 1990 with a case of bacterial pneumonia, the magic seemed to be lost in the Jim Henson workshop. Is it a coincidence that he was set to sell his company to Disney that weekend? Disney owns the Muppets as of 2004, but many skeptics believe it was Henson’s son Brian who drove the Muppets into a place that is less ingenious and magical than where it was when Jim was in charge. Since 1990, the movies have been lame, the TV shows were mostly remakes, and the voices just seem off. (Oz still performs occassionally, but it’s not the same without his partner.) Sesame Street has tried to introduce new characters, like Abby Cadabby (the pink puppet with Kevin Clash, far right), but the overly planned creations will never capture anyone’s imagination the way a simple monster with a great performer can. Will the Muppets ever be great again? I hope so. And if not, then that just makes Jim Henson an even greater artist—someone who inspired many but whose feats can never be rivaled. Plus, there’s always The Muppet Show on DVD.

Kevin Clash picked up an extra red monster (created in the ’70s) and the rest is history.

A Mupeteer aids Jim Henson and Frank Oz in a Bert and Ernie sketch. Muppeteers stand crowded together in a pit on the set of the latest Muppets movie for a shot.

Artist we like:

jim henson

Rowlf, the first muppet; Dinosaurs, that ABC sit-com; Fraggle Rock; Gonzo’s people; lots of muppets, Burt and Ernie; the original Sesame Street gang.

Kevin Clash picked up an extra red monster (created in the ’70s) and the rest is history.

A Mupeteer aids Jim Henson and Frank Oz in a Bert and Ernie sketch. Muppeteers stand crowded together in a pit on the set of the latest Muppets movie for a shot.

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FiVe thinGs random thIngS about meghan on JIll’S mInd

LOVE I have learned Meghan loves

“Plus I covet JGL’s wardrobe”

anything with pigs or VW logos. HATE It still makes me giggle that

she thought I hated her after her initial interview. At that time it was just me and Cindi on the mag; my days were not filled with sunshine and rainbows. So Meghan, it wasn’t you; it really was me

-tom

—Rich

“I thought all you wore were pants and sweater vests” -dave

“I’m bringing creepy back” -rich

“If I didn’t want to spend $25 on new jeans, why would I want to spend that on olive oil?” -madeline

“I don’t understand what this is. It’s a robe you wear backwards?” -british man at cyclones Snuggie game

“It does look like a cover for the Advocate” -kathy

i’m loVin’ it T he photo I swapped on Jess’ desk happened to match perfectly with what she got for lunch. —Rich

tAKe A Bite... ..out of crime! If Ace the Bat-hound looked like this, we would remember him.

“You have a national parade and yet you have no nation” -Jimmy

J-sCHOOL Meghan went to journalism school. Don’t question it. REFREsHING Her need for Dunkin’ Donuts iced coffee is unparalleled.

ADW

art department weekly issue 64 vol. 2

Cheer up, Keanu

comic con from JV lizâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s things Sperman saves the day PLus: more keanu converse cheeseburger cody

FiVe thiNGs THE RANDOM THINGS ON PAM’S (YES... THAT PAM) MIND.

adW

ART DEPARTMENT WEEKLY ISSUE 65 VOL. 2

loVe cHAnninG tAtuM.

For some reason he always seems to be in on the joke of his movies (Check out GI Joe) And, of course, he’s got the major ab thing going.

I‘m addicted to rolos.

I know tHe Girl WitH tHe DrAGon tAttoo is all the rage but I don’t understand the hoopla. I had to force myself to finish the book. Falls into my “Seriously Overrated” column.

GreAt WHite sHArKs... Was thinking how amazing these animals are. And also what the hell I would do if one came up and bit me in the ass while surfing off the coast of Cape Cod on my vacation. (Several had been spotted scarfing down seals while I was there.) Chances are I’d end up taking a bite out of his ass too. Clearly you don’t want to mess with me on my vacation.

Eminem’s new CD RECOVERY...the best rap

album in a while. Two of my favorite tracks: “Love the Way You Lie” and “Not Afraid. “

THE PEOPLE’S CHAMP PAM’S THINGS IMMONEN MORE MO’S Plus: MORE KEANU ARTIST WHO WRITE CRAZY CAKE

miNi board

ard

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“You look like an fob Irish man” -Tom

“I want to overdose on Mo’nuff. I want to trip balls on Meghan.” -Rich

“It looks like Blossom” -Madeline

http://www.scottpilgrimthemovie.com/avatarCreator/ Sign on, make an avatar, be awesome.–Luis

“I play the Rainbow Connection on the guitar... it makes my mother cry” -Dacey

“The pasta and sauce is just a vehicle to eat the ground beef” -Katie

Fake Use YoUr Wii Wii LV spotted this gem of an article titled “Touch Her With Your Wii Wii,” which describes how you can learn the art of massage through a video game. Which is ridiculous. But go on. It’s not like other video games haven’t provoked you...

Ugh. That video where the idiot reporter knocks over the ice sculpture was completely faked. The sculptor was in on it and everything. (Look for “The Hough Hewitt Show” on TownHall.com.) But all the video suggestions that pop up along the rail in YouTube make me so glad I moved away from a Broadcast major. I mean, there are some seriously horrifying things happening on camera that thousands of people are apparently excited to watch. (Check it out!) —MV

artist We like:

“I’ve earned a new nickname on the field—el toro blanco—b/c I am tenacious and white” -DRM

“Don’t let the sweatervest and Star Wars music fool you, I’m a badass” -Luis

stUart immoNeN

Not many artists can claim they are synonymous with anyone as iconic as Superman. You have Shuster and Siegel in ’40s, Curt Swan in the ’60s and ’70s, John Byrne in the ’80s and Stuart Immonen in the ’90s. In the late ’90s Immonen pencilled his very unique u nique style on Superman for close to four years. y ears. His work is clean and expressive. Very ffew ew lines with very limited shading. He provided p rovided Superman with a fresh and iconic llook ook while often being thrown curveballs by DC. Superman had to have long hair? Immonen obliged. We’re changing Superman’s costume to electric blue; Immonen hit it out of the park. No matter what DC threw his way, Immonen handled it with aplomb. His fresh approach works perfectly on brighter characters like Superman and Spider-Man (who Immonen went on to pencil after leaving DC to sign exclusively with Marvel.) In the comic world, where lateness is a prevalent trait among artists, Immonen is refreshingly different. His style is unique and distinctive, but he never misses a deadline. I’d be hard-pressed to name one month in the past 15 years that didn’t have an Immonen release. That kind of productivity is unrivaled by any artist at the big two. While at DC, Immonen kept a regular schedule with Superman while still being able to work on high-profile mini-series such as Final Night and the brilliant Secret Identity (amazing story with Kurt Busiek where a real-world boy named Clark Kent realizes he has super powers—should be a must-read for any comic fan). Since they signed him exclusively, Immonen has become one of Marvel’s big guns. After pencilling Ultimate Spider-Man for two years, he went over to work with Brian Michael Bendis on Marvel’s top-selling New Avengers. He is currently still working on the New Aveners as Marvel has relaunched that title with characters more suited to Immonen’s bright and clean approach (Spidey, Wolverine, Iron-Fist, Thing, Luke Cage and Ms. Marvel). He did all this while also providing covers and inking duties on his wife’s Hellcat mini. Not only a great artist, Immonen’s a great husband, too.

SOCIAL STUDIES

BELOW THE BRIM

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Tony Caramanico, Jenna from Rose Hill Farm, Nic Roldan, Bridgehampton Floriﬆ, Russ Steele, John Heilemann, Sam Talbot (and his tuna ceviche), Tracy Anderson, Orion Mims (aka Mr. Adventure), Jessica Bellofatto, Geoff Reinhard, Levain, Anna Pump, Miss Debbie, Crows Nest, Navy Beach, Joni’s, The Surf Lodge, Share with Me, Ina Garten, Tutto Il Giorno, Urban Zen, Wellnest, Tapovana, Erika Halweil, Babette’s, The Blue Parrot, Jimmy Minardi, Ev, Zev, Eric Sriffler, Gabe, Katherine and Katia, Lars and Main Beach Surf and Sport, Tim O’Brien, Mark Humphrey, Manuel, Harry Ludlow, Jennifer Pike, Mikey Matts, Green Thumb, Chris Robbins at Robbins Wolfe Eventeurs, Giuliana, Dr. Gerry Giratola, Jon’s homemade ice cream, Ditch Witch sandwiches, Hidden treasures in Greenport, Cherry tomatoes from Pikes Farm Stand, Sagg Main Farm Stand, Junior lifeguards, Southampton < ? K Polo Club, Bing Montauk concerts, Watermelon salads in scooped-out 9<CFN 9@;J 9I@DN<CC watermelons, Teddy Bear sunflowers, Kale watermelon juice, Drumming =8I< DD<I with your kids, Wölffer rosé, Warm evenings, Traveling carnivals, Baby L KF J )(' macchiatos at Sant Ambroeus, Beach radio, The Montauko, Sand dune hikes in Napeague, Paddleboarding, Kayaking with five-year-old passengers, Bonfires with s’mores, Wednesday-night beach BBQs and potlucks, The Yardsale, Friendly farmers, The Lobster Farm, Steven Gaines’ radio show, Beach walks, Sandy beach boot camps, Sunset Beach dinners by Adam Kelinson, Sag Harbor movie theater, Juicy Naam’s Moon Juice, Sailing with Captain Bob, Young Thai coconut water, Tots boogie boarding, Orange, pink or purple sunsets, Only one full rainy day, Amber Waves, Never-ending bike rides, Summer love, Herb gardens, Barefoot days into nights, Ice cream faces on toddlers, Local artiﬆs, Phoenix House, Courtney Potts, Surfing, surfing, more surfing, Ocean swims with friends, Best Buddies, The Hampton Classic, Blue ribbons at Sagg Horse show, Summer tunes, Convertible drives from Southampton to Montauk, Time, time, (not enough) time, Endless summer days, Ocean breezes Love, Haley Continue to follow me at twitter.com/haleybinn and on hamptons-magazine.com to find out what’s happening in the Hamptons.

HAMPTONS-MAGAZINE.COM

best oF mo Jill submitted this lovely end-of-season piece that Meghan designed. We just hope someone added another zero to change “210” to “2010.”

meGhaN & mUPPets aNd that’s oNlY halF The internet is a great place to find idiotic things. It’s a surefire pickmeup, like going to Coney Island and seeing at least five people who are worse off than you. But when you realize that the iconically idiotic American thing you are reading about is actually being broadcast in a foreign country, such as running across Jersey Shore on the British MTV site, the moment suddenly calls for a face palm rather than a laugh. Here we have the lovely story of Chidi, the Texas bride who wanted to renew her wedding vows in style. As if a life-size cake to replicate herself weren’t enough of a dream come true, Chidi wanted her husband, Innocence, to also have a life-size cake in his image. Unfortunately, there just wasn’t enough time. Or butterscotch and polymer clay. Aren’t we so glad the Daily Mail of London is running this? —Madeline

bloodY Good CoVer The latest issue of Rolling Stone has the stars of HBO’s True Blood naked and bloody on the cover. If you’ve seen True Blood you know this shot is actually tame compared to what goes on in Bon Temps on a weekly basis. As a side note, the RS covers have been particularly good of late. Katy Perry, Leonardo Dicaprio, Russell Brand, Lady Gaga and the Glee cast have all been excellent.

Okay, this issue is a little late... but better late than never. The extra week in between issues alowed us to finally receive Pam McNally’s “Five Things.” Pam’s Things has been in the works for a few months now. They definitely do not disappoint, even if I do disagree with her on Channing Tatum. This issue also brings us a piece from Rich on what it really takes to be a People’s Champ. (The Rock has nothing on Mo.) We also have a sidebar featuring other great Mo’s. “Artist We Like” visits the comic store again and features Stuart Immonen. He’s a brilliant Canadian artist who left his mark on the Man of Steel in the ’90s. Amy also checks in with two pieces. One is a good-bye to her Bitch-mate Meghan, the other is right next to this column. Just because we’re artists doesn’t mean we don’t write. We also have a crazy wedding cake, an awesome Rolling Stone cover and more Keanu, courtesy of Rich who also provided the great cover image of Batman reading his very non-newsstand publication. (I bent the rules a bit and didn’t make Batman submit content before receiving his copy.) I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention the ending of one of my favorite comic series, Ex Machina. Issue 50 was released last Wednesday, culminating the story of Mitchell Hundred, former superhero and current mayor of NYC. The book takes some very dark turns,

but we’re left with many major dramatic moments beautifully written by Brian K. Vaughn (a former Lost scribe) and lushly illustrated by Tony Harris. This issue perfectly caps Hundred’s story. We learn what his future holds for him and how unwavering he is in his political career. I’d give up more details, but that would really ruin the series for you if Vaughn ever brings it to TV. I will miss my monthly installments of a bok I once described as one part West Wing, one part X-Files and all parts awesome.

Some people think art doesn’t read the text that they work with, or that they’re not so good with that... word stuff. But au contraire, some of us are trained journalists and still like to dabble, even if it’s just writing headlines. I like to help Tom out with articles he’s having a tough time finding a head for. I’ve started making a list for Hamptons, just in case he needs some more:

I Like Big Boats and I Cannot Lie Three Sheets to the Wind Pleasure Craft Sea’s the Day About a Buoy Buoy Toy Buoy Wonder And thinking ahead to Aspen Peak....

Piste Off -Amy

SOCIAL STUDIES

BELOW THE BRIM

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HAMPTONS-MAGAZINE.COM

best oF mo Jill submitted this lovely end-of-season piece that Meghan designed. We just hope someone added another zero to change “210” to “2010.”

I Like Big Boats and I Cannot Lie Three Sheets to the Wind Pleasure Craft Sea’s the Day About a Buoy Buoy Toy Buoy Wonder And thinking ahead to Aspen Peak....

Piste Off -Amy

More Mos

What does it take to be the People’s Champ? Everything. The casual idiot on the street has no idea what it takes to be the People’s Champ. The title is not just an ordainment to be placed on a business card or tattooed on the lower right ass. No, it is a way of life that only a mere few are strong enough to live both physically and mentally. To truly be a “Champ” your physical prowess must be at near Steve Seagal level at all times. You must train at the hardest, most badass, testosterone fueled grounds known to the modern man, The New York Sports Club. Here, the Champ can fully release her near god-like strengths daily, slowing building up to even more… god-like strengths. To see the Champ run at speeds not yet measured by modern instruments while listening to slam’n’ beats is alone both epic and humbling. Mortals who witness this are left on their knees, kissing the Earth and thanking it for such a gift. They then are incinerated instantly from the shockwave of pure awesomeness once the Champ decides to “up the ante” and watch Everyone Loves Raymond, too. The physical pressure of such an act on the normal human body would be identical to being strapped to the front of the space shuttle during re-entry. But to truly be the People’s Champ, you must also have the mind of a Champ. Your thoughts must be that of Rocky (minus the massive brain damage) and Steven Hawking (known as “Hawk” to his closest friends). When the innocent are being persecuted, your duty is that of protection. A few quiet sounds from your lips must break down the foundations of your enemies like perfectly placed artillery fire. The Champ does not take prisoners to those that hate. The Champ just counts the bodies as they’re being dragged away. We shouldn’t think of our Champ leaving us for some better place. We shouldn’t feel abandoned. We shouldn’t spit in the Champ’s coffee while away in her exit interview. No. These aren’t the actions of those who have been protected for such a long time. We should be happy our Champ is leaving to defend others. She is after all the “People’s” Champ, and it would be wrong of us to hog her for ourselves. So long, Champ. —Rich

The saddest part about Meghan leaving is, of course, that the Bitches Be Crazy column is officially discontinued. It had a long, colorful run and hopefully will be syndicated for other publications. Meghan was

always my bitch in crime, the person I could complain to about the smallest thing (people not flushing!) to the biggest (the window washers!). She always said I was the epitome of Jersey, but you know what, Meghan? You’ve

definitely got some Jersey girl in you, too. That stuff just seeps in, kind of like cancer, and slowly eats away at your naturally cheerful disposition. Whoever sits behind me just won’t be the same. Bitches forever! —Amy

So Amy, Meghan, and I went to the Frites’n Meats cart for some kick ass burgers on Wednesday. That’s all. Oh wait, Tom came too! —Rich

More Pictures of M’Oneil

More Mos

So Amy, Meghan, and I went to the Frites’n Meats cart for some kick ass burgers on Wednesday. That’s all. Oh wait, Tom came too! —Rich

More Pictures of M’Oneil

miNi board

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“You look like an fob Irish man” -Tom

“I want to overdose on Mo’nuff. I want to trip balls on Meghan.” -Rich

“It looks like Blossom” -Madeline

http://www.scottpilgrimthemovie.com/avatarCreator/ Sign on, make an avatar, be awesome.–Luis

“I play the Rainbow Connection on the guitar... it makes my mother cry” -Dacey

“The pasta and sauce is just a vehicle to eat the ground beef” -Katie

artist We like:

“I’ve earned a new nickname on the field—el toro blanco—b/c I am tenacious and white” -DRM

“Don’t let the sweatervest and Star Wars music fool you, I’m a badass” -Luis

stUart immoNeN

FiVe thiNGs THE RANDOM THINGS ON PAM’S (YES... THAT PAM) MIND.

adW

ART DEPARTMENT WEEKLY ISSUE 65 VOL. 2

loVe cHAnninG tAtuM.

For some reason he always seems to be in on the joke of his movies (Check out GI Joe) And, of course, he’s got the major ab thing going.

I‘m addicted to rolos.

I know tHe Girl WitH tHe DrAGon tAttoo is all the rage but I don’t understand the hoopla. I had to force myself to finish the book. Falls into my “Seriously Overrated” column.

Eminem’s new CD RECOVERY...the best rap

album in a while. Two of my favorite tracks: “Love the Way You Lie” and “Not Afraid. “

THE PEOPLE’S CHAMP PAM’S THINGS IMMONEN MORE MO’S Plus: MORE KEANU ARTIST WHO WRITE CRAZY CAKE

ADW

no hustle

My softball team wrapped its season by falling to an undefeated opponent in the Championship Series. As sad as I am to have lost the most important series of the year, I have to tip my cap to all of my teammates for their hard work, dedication and overall attitude for the year. My team, No Hustle, finished 16-9 for the regular season—only second in the division to a team that went 27-0. I am supremely confident that if we did not run into a team that should have been playing in a higher division, we would have won it all. So here’s to you, No Hustle, whether it was double-mercying a bush league team after all of No Hustle was out until 5 am chuggin’ Rocket Fuels, Craig crushing two grandslams, K-Dog barehanding the weirdest hop you’ll ever see up the middle, the Big Cat picking balls out of the dirt at 1st, Matt Schumpf running down EVERYTHING in the outfield, Jesse’s rocket arm at 3rd, Toons making a run at the #1 spot in the rotation, the always amazing ‘Jimmy Shimmy’ down the 1st baseline, Matty Sganga putting down the signs for me making suckas whiff, Pat the Bat taking rookie of the year, Dom “the Skipper” making those sliding catches out in left, picking up Delaney off of waivers and roping a HR or the highlight of the season - the Peppa Jack Leap into homeplate! Sincerely, El Toro Blanco

art department weekly issue 66 vol. 2

the great escape

If you’ve never been to Fire Island before, do yourself a favor and get there before summer’s end. [Editor’s Note: DRM did totally submit this in a timely manner. Also, it’s hot until like November.] Recently, I had the pleasure of staying at Kismet, Fire Island for my second annual week-long vacation. This town is unlike any other place on Long Island I have ever been—and I was born and bred on LI. This small strip of land provides beach goers with a different state of mind, seemingly light years away from the NYC hustle and bustle, yet only a quick ferry ride away. The best part of Kismet is the atmosphere. There are no cars on the island, so the residents move around by foot or if you need to get somewhere in a hurry, the quickest means of transport is a trusty beach cruiser bike. This lack of automobiles on the island allows vacationers to move at a slower pace, both literally and figuratively. You navigate through beach bungalows individually named “Bananas,” “Chance,” “Eye-Gasm” and “BeachSide” via a narrow grid of concrete sidewalks until you reach the shore or up to the docks. Passersby are always greeted with a wave or a nod of the head as everyone has shed the New York bravado and adopted the laid back beach mentality. Don’t be surprised if a once gruff and brazen fellow offers you a drink at the beach as everyone seems to be in a good mood and there for the same reason—to chill. I strongly suggest everyone partake in the experience that is Fire Island before some Level 5 hurricane inevitably washes it all way into the briny deep. Weekday parking runs $8 per day and a round trip ferry ride to Kismet will run you $17 bucks. Once you get there, order yourself a Rocket Fuel at the Kismet Inn and thank me later. —DRM

fire island is not gay canon expo magic on the court little big planet PLus: no hustle Niche pictures jane’s things

MInI BoArD 8-BIt heAVen LV sent us this creative gem from invinciblemuffin.com, the artist explains “‘8-bit Heaven’ is my tribute to the heady ‘Golden Age’ of video gaming, when the first video games were not only thrilling for the game play, but were art in motion for me. The portrait in the center of the image is a picture of me from 1978, rendered in a pointillist style out of quarters, the currency of the arcade. The surrounding “rainbow” is composed of thousands of characters from video games that I played between 1978 and 1984.”

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“The last week is always a good one, it’s like a victory lap” -luis

“He also leads the league in Valtrex purchases... You know he has herpes, right?” -john

nerD heAVen Fans of Star Wars who went to Celebration V two weeks ago and also attended the Disney Last Ride to Endor event, were treated to a rare Lucas crossover: Indiana Jone and Star Wars stunt spectacular which ended with Indy taking on Vader. If you thought that was cool (I did) then have no doubt that yes... you (like me) are a nerd.

stYle heAVen Madalyn will knock you out! Scott is business in the front, party in the back!!!

ArtIst We lIKe:

“I love these fucking hipsters... Half of Williamsburg gets their rent paid for by their parents, yet they have money for coke” -dave

“I wish someone would find a finger in their Pop Chips, and they would just go away” ~april

“These are all garbage, by the way.” -john byrne

“They shove something in his hand every once in a while to make you believe it’s real, like Bob Dole’s” -madeline

eArVIn Johnson

As I was going through the names in an online directory of famous names and making a list of potential “j” artists, I wasn’t finding anyone I was crazy about. I had pulled:

Hugh Jackman Phil Jackson Joan Jett Janis Joplin Peter Jackson Billy Joel Then finally I thought about Earvin “Magic” Johnson. Sure it’s a stretch to call a basketball player an artist, but he did things that had never been done before. Plus we constantly hear people talk about his extraordinary court vision. How he simply would see things that others could not. Hmmm... Someone who does things that have never been done before with an unrivaled style and panache while viewing the landscape differently than everyone else? Sounds more like an artist than a ball player to me. Magic Johnson made everyone on the court better. In my eyes, he’s the greatest player who ever lived. I know, most will argue another MJ—Michael Jordan—but I simply don’t see Jordan going to Phil Jackson in the NBA Finals and subbing for the starting center. It’s something Magic did. With an injured Kareem, Magic started at center and led the Lakers to the title. A point guard starting at center (and winning)? Unheard of. But a lot of what Magic did was unheard of. Magic could seamlessly play any one of the five positions on the court. There are probably only a handful of people all-time who could make such a claim. Rather than remembering his last press conference as a Laker, we should all remember his creativity on the court. His vision should define his career as an artist in yellow and purple.

FIVe thIngs

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the random things on jane’s mind.

WaTERMELon souR PaTch

Can’t stop eating them.

And while we’re on the subject of things that could eventually make me diabetic, BEn anD JERRY’s nEW BosTon cREaM PiE flavor is hands down their greatest pint yet.

oh the gooD lIFe

I’ve been watching a lot of EMBaRRassing MTV REaLiTY shoWs lately. It makes me

Ladies, if you ever need a sELFEsTEEM BoosT, just go to a gay bar with a really hot gay friend. Once it turns “dick o’clock” (actual quote from a guy at Barracuda around 3 a.m.), you’ll be flooded with compliments from all the slutty boys trying to claw their way past you into his pants.

wonder: Would I be better off if I had been Super Sweet 16 and pregnant and raising my baby in the Real World house on the Jersey Shore?

According to wikipedia, DiMPLEs play a positive role in many cultures for sexual selection. Is this the appeal for Miranda Kerr? If so, I have dimples too you guys. And mine are real.

Here we are, the second week of September, and I have no football preview to share with you. That’s because life is good. I have a PS3. I have Madden 11. I have a wife who not only doesn’t complain about me playing Madden in the living room but also lets me go on and on about the players I plan to draft. And then I have a son, and he loves to tackle the cats. Yeah, life is good. Madden 11 is simply put the best Madden game since 2005. That’s saying something, as I think Madden 05 is the best Madden game ever. The gameplay is excellent. The graphics are without peer. The new defensive AI makes it harder to dominate while only calling a handful of plays. Now this game isn’t for everyone. If you aren’t a hardcore gamer, or football nut, it will all be a little much. It’s not as user-friendly and easy to play as the old-school Tecmo Bowl. What Madden 11 is is a brilliant football simulation. The closest thing you can get to strapping on pads and stepping on the field. Better than witnessing how Madden has grown and improved is witnessing my son grow throughout his first year. Did I ever imagine that he would make me laugh as much as he does every day? I knew he would be a lot of work. I knew I would love him. But I had no idea he would make me this happy. Happy 1st birthday, Kal. You’re a real super baby. This issue, while it doesn’t feature a footbally preview from me, does include several big pieces from Madeline and

DRM. Take a peek inside the Canon Expo with Madeline, then check out Fire Island with DRM. Be sure to congratulate him—No Hustle went all the way to the Championship game. For more sports, read this week’s Artist We Like installment. Definitely not a traditional artist, but someone I consider an artist nonetheless. Jane shares the Five Things on her mind. Probably the only place you’ll find Sour Patch Kids, Jersey Shore, gay bars and Miranda Kerr together. Here is NFL preview: Cowboys versus Jets in the Super Bowl, with the Cowboys winning a Super Bowl home game. Aaron Rodgers will win the MVP.

If you would have told me that I would love a game that had little sack people jumping around a fictional world collecting stickers, I would have told you that you were crazy. It sounds like crap to entertain kids. All of that changed once I sat down and actually played Little Big Planet. The graphics are amazing, the gameplay addictive, and the level of customization is mind boggling. Not only can you change the look of your sack person, but you can also create entire new levels and then share them with the online community. This game has laid the blueprint to what I believe is the future of gaming. Low cost or no cost games (mine came free with the PS3) that offer all sorts of add-ons you can purchase online. These add-ons enhance a 2-year-old game and keep it fresh for a new audience. Two such add ons we recently purchased were Marvel comic packs (costumes and levels) and Watchmen movie packs. Our sack people can now bounce around as Captain America or Rorschach (both of which left me giddy once I had changed my character’s costume... Yeah, I’m not ashamed to say I was giddy, giggling like a schoolgirl). Now if only my sack person could don a Superman costume. —LV

Canon arranged a mock fashion show, making dozens of cameras available for testing. On the left, expo-goers watch and shoot the fashion show; on the right, they wait for the next turn. In a mini commercial studio, Michel Tcherevkoff (in pink with the makeup artist and model) could demonstrate Canon wireless technology and a 1Ds. He tells all the yahoos ruining his shots, “You cannot use this in your portfolios.”

Canon Expo Things to Expect at Expo

Cameras, printers, etc. People in suits People with cameras Free coffee Boasting that sensors will be smart enough to retouch major corrections (I guess I didn’t expect enough)

The most extraordinary part of being at Canon Expo 2010 was being alone. The second most extraordinary part was seeing what else Canon is capable of creating. After receiving an invitation from Adorama to attend this event that apparently only happens every five years, I pictured rows and rows of products on display. It sounded like the perfect place to have someone tell me which camera to buy. While the Expo turned out to be nothing like I first imagined, it was a nice little opportunity to get out of the house and find some encouragement to be creative. When I first arrived at the Jacob Javits Center Friday morning, I hesitated signing in and going upstairs. Everyone was wearing suit. What the hell? I know jeans and a T-shirt isn’t dressy, but who knew I would be so seriously underdressed? So I stood up straight and thought to myself, I have a badge. I took a shower. And I’m a photographer dammit. And I went upstairs. At first I milled around with the other suits, learning about Canon’s newest sensor technology (that they care to display) and file browsers. None of it seemed to really apply to me, but it was

fun to step into a little sci-fi for a while. Then I checked the clock and headed to my first seminar: Shane Hurlbut walking us through the making of a featurelength film with a Canon 5D, which is a still camera. Now, when debating what to do about my personal camera situation, video technology has to be taken into account because every SLR will now be equipped with video capability and every client will want video online. There was really nothing at the Expo to explain why and how a single lens reflex camera is now a video camera. I guess the talks

and seminars with cinematographers was as close as Canon wanted to come to that discussion. And all this amounted to was that you cannot expect to become a professional cinematographer just because you have that same camera. Hurlbut was the cinematographer for Terminator Salvation, Into the Blue, and many other Hollywood movies. The description said that this seminar would explain how to get a big budget look without the budget. Instead, it was more like 45 minutes of Hurlbut marveling at how amazing this dinky little 5D was. I’m glad I attended just for the invaluable

knowledge that you can’t expect big budget results just because you have a 5D and some nice lighting. You still need all the other people who do sound and editing, plus something like 18 camera bodies and 100 lenses. But apparently the 5D is amazing. (The inset pictures are from Hurlbut’s short “The Last 3 Minutes” which was shot completely with a 5D. If you watch it online, you can better appreciate the color and details.) So, one seminar down, and I still didn’t know which camera I should be looking to buy. I quickly headed to the next seminar that interested me: Michel Tcherevkoff walking us through 30 years of his portfolio. I suppose that every time someone who is successful at his job shows up to an industry event to talk to a bunch of people who are clamoring to better themselves become wildly succesful very quickly they are faced with annoying questions like, “How can I become famous right now without trying?” Tcherevkoff actually addressed these sorts of thoughts many times throughout his presentation. (The answer? Make a 10-year plan. Become focused. Get your work out there. Don’t waste your time or energy deviating from the 10-year plan.) The description for Tcherevkoff’s seminar said that it would explain how to become more creative using

advancements in digital technology. That wasn’t really the case. Tcherevkoff was a surrealist who used photography as his medium. Fragrance companies went gaga for his work. Avon and the like kept him in business for decades. When the market started to really tank for advertising photographers five years ago, he began using Photoshop to create new art in his free time. (Go to Tcherevkoff. com. It’s insane how his work from 20 years ago fits in seamlessly with his work from three years ago.) At the end of the seminar, I went back to the floor believing I need to find an art project. The original question continued to nag me. Which camera should I buy? Finding myself in the actual camera section of the expo (now surrounded by too many people in jeans who seemed too excited to display their own cameras), I was surprised there were only six guys answering questions at three little countertops. That was all I really needed, though—one person who was familiar with all the Canon models and all the latest dish. I listened to my one person list the differences for someone else. I jumped in with a question or two. I watched the nonsene happening around me (see above photos). I asked a few more questions. I went home feeling good about the 5D and wondering what to do next with my photography. —Madeline

Canon Expo Things to Expect at Expo

Cameras, printers, etc. People in suits People with cameras Free coffee Boasting that sensors will be smart enough to retouch major corrections (I guess I didn’t expect enough)

ADW

no hustle

art department weekly issue 66 vol. 2

the great escape

fire island is not gay canon expo magic on the court little big planet PLus: no hustle Niche pictures jane’s things

ArD

t r YA

e h r e

“The last week is always a good one, it’s like a victory lap” -luis

“He also leads the league in Valtrex purchases... You know he has herpes, right?” -john

stYle heAVen Madalyn will knock you out! Scott is business in the front, party in the back!!!

ArtIst We lIKe:

“I love these fucking hipsters... Half of Williamsburg gets their rent paid for by their parents, yet they have money for coke” -dave

“I wish someone would find a finger in their Pop Chips, and they would just go away” ~april

“These are all garbage, by the way.” -john byrne

“They shove something in his hand every once in a while to make you believe it’s real, like Bob Dole’s” -madeline

eArVIn Johnson

As I was going through the names in an online directory of famous names and making a list of potential “j” artists, I wasn’t finding anyone I was crazy about. I had pulled:

FIVe thIngs

e l t lIt

g I BlAnet

the random things on jane’s mind.

WaTERMELon souR PaTch

Can’t stop eating them.

And while we’re on the subject of things that could eventually make me diabetic, BEn anD JERRY’s nEW BosTon cREaM PiE flavor is hands down their greatest pint yet.

oh the gooD lIFe

I’ve been watching a lot of EMBaRRassing MTV REaLiTY shoWs lately. It makes me

wonder: Would I be better off if I had been Super Sweet 16 and pregnant and raising my baby in the Real World house on the Jersey Shore?

According to wikipedia, DiMPLEs play a positive role in many cultures for sexual selection. Is this the appeal for Miranda Kerr? If so, I have dimples too you guys. And mine are real.

five things The Random Things on Laurie’s mind

When Luis first told me the concept of Five Things, he added with some vigor that “it’s always helpful if you include a hot woman” (in Luis’ defense, he had been drinking when he said this). And so as a tribute to Luis, my kindred spirit in all things Star Wars and Sinatra, here is my hot-woman-themed Five Things.

ADW

art department weekly issue 67 vol. 2

Rose Byrne I’m obsessed with Damages only slightly less than Mad Men—mainly because of the writing, but also because I have this inexplicable non-sexual crush on Rose Byrne. I suggest her for covers all the time, thus far without success. Carey Mulligan If you haven’t seen An

Education, please Netflix it immediately, because she is quite luminous in this perfect little jewel of a film. I saw her in a screening of Wall Street 2 recently, and while she’s good in that, mainly it reminded me that she just shined so much more in An Education. About as close as we can get to a modern-day Audrey Hepburn, and that’s not a compliment I toss around with abandon. Isabeli Fontana I get model crushes during

each Fashion Week, typically someone I see a lot who I just think is breathtaking and really owns it. Isabeli is a forever model crush—sick body, gorgeous, amazing walk. You’re welcome, Luis. Christina Hendricks Mad Men kind of dominates my universe, and I’m thrilled so many designers feel similarly, evoking it as an inspiration for their collections. Christina Hendricks kills me every week just walking down a hallway. Was lucky enough to meet her during Fashion’s Night Out - a celeb crush can be spoiled so quickly when you meet them, but she was beyond lovely and genuine, not a trace of attitude or diva, which only makes her more beautiful, right? Winged Victory of Samothrace One of

my favorite things in the world, she resides at the top of a grand staircase in the Louvre, and I make a pilgrimage to her every time I’m in Paris. She’s from 190 BC, a gift to Greece after some naval battle, and for literal centuries she stood out among the waves, protecting the island of Samothrace. The effect of the fabric draped across her stomach is nothing less than mind-blowing. She also figures prominently in perhaps the greatest of all fashion films, 1957’s Funny Face, and it was that film, and that scene in particular, that made me want to work in fashion.

fashion the king camel toe fashion’s night out PLus: tom’s inspiration glee returns Laurie’s things

mini BoArD

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“Let’s go eat a goddamn snack” -rex ryan

get YoUr glee on Chris Colfer Photographed by Robert Trachtenberg for Rolling stone

rApist remiX While i enjoy a good dJ steve Porter mix of real audio, i found this submission from dRm to be particularly brilliant—especially if you watch the original news story: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KhQWbiKcVw i’m not sure which i love more: the lyrics (“hide your husband because they’re rapin’ everyone out there”) or the white kids dancing. Thanks, dRm!

“When I was young, I thought the World Series meant the Yankees played somebody” -kathy

“Oh boy... Here comes contrarian hour” -John

“Fuck you, rude lady” -madeline

“When you wear your heart on your sleeve, make sure your shirt is f’ing dope.” -mindy kaling

thAt’s A lot of BeAtles

We love Legos at Casa Vega. maxim.com shares with us the greatest Lego album cover recreations (which brings to light that there are apparenty no black people in the Lego universe). Check out the list of “21 awesome Lego album Covers” at maxim.com.

Artist We like:

“Tomorrow is Friday. In Spain, the phrase TGIF would be GADQEV. I’m saying we’re lucky to be Americans.” -Conan o’Brien

JAck kirBY

how could i pick any artist other than Jack Kirby for this week’s artist We Like? Jack Kirby is affectionately called the “King of Comics.” he is pegged as the man who singlehandedly (fuck stan Lee) injected life into a dying medium. in the ’50s, comics had fallen on hard times. They were stale a nd predictable. most books used a 6- or 9-square grid on every page and told the action in a very and s traightforward manner. on top of this, Fredric Wertham released seduction of the innocent which straightforward p reached about the evils of the comic form and led to the limiting Comics Code authority. The ’50s preached w ere basically a wash for the superhero genre. The best selling titles of the decade were Westerns, were romance and crime stories that conformed to the CCa.

The ’60s saw the dawn of marvel comics which in turn saw the formation of quite possibly the greatest comic team ever: stan Lee and Jack Kirby. Lee’s words and Kirby’s pencils gave a shot in the arm to the comic form. Kirby became famous for breaking free of the traditional grid. objects flew at the readers. speed lines emphasized motion. “Kirby bubbles” made the pages teem with motion and energy. Kirby drew his stories on a very grand scale. You often had full spread splash pages where the heroes were in a tiny corner and a massive, beautifullydesigned structure was in the background. Kirby wasn’t a stickler for anatomical accuracy. he was much more interested in framing his characters dramatically to tell a good story. a Kirby-drawn story was dramatic and in-your-face. You couldn’t wait to turn the page and see what was coming. Kirby laid the groundwork for how all future artists would tell their stories. Jack Kirby is best summed up by fellow artist and legend gil Kane with the following: “Jack was the single most influential figure in the turnaround in marvel’s fortunes from the time he rejoined the company ... it wasn’t merely that Jack conceived most of the characters that are being done, but ... Jack’s point of view and philosophy of drawing became the governing philosophy of the entire publishing company and, beyond the publishing company, of the entire field ... [marvel took] Jack and use[d] him as a primer. They would get artists ... and they taught them the aBCs, which amounted to learning Jack Kirby. ... Jack was like the holy scripture and they simply had to follow him without deviation. That’s what was told to me.” Besides his brilliance with a pencil, Kirby is one of the most successful character creators of all time. Kirby is credited (“co-credited” i suppose) with creating many of the iconic marvel

heroes. Captain america, hulk, Fantastic Four, daredevil, doctor doom, the original X-men (Cyclops, Jean grey, ice-man, Beast and angel), Thor, iron-man, ant-man and Wasp. not to mention after marvel he had a long and successful run at dC Comics where he created the whole idea of the new gods (orion, Lightray, darkseid—characters

who are still relevant and play a huge role in dC Comics to this day). Kirby was a true innovator and the most influential comic artist of all-time. While the CCa could have crushed the comic industry and left me with a dull and colorless life, Kirby was there to break down barriers within the parameters of censorship. —LV

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oh Look What you’Ve stePPed in... Jessica sent us this lovely story about Lady gaga and her quick-change awesomeness at the Video music awards, but after looking at the pictures of gaga’s shoes and the theme for this issue, i realized i could finally sneak in LV’s illustration of ridiculous sandals. i mean, seriously. What are we thinking sometimes? LV says: “i looked over and wondered what had happened to that girl’s foot. Why is she wearing an ankle brace? Then i saw she was wearing TWo ankle braces. oh wait... They weren’t braces at all. They were her sandals. now, i’m no fashion expert (don’t let the 10 years at eLLe fool you) but sandals that cover more of your foot and ankle than most shoes (or look like the brace i wear to play basketball) simply aren’t sandals anymore. You know what they are? Ridiculous. Why not simply wear a shoe?” The return of Fall means the return of football. not the nFL, but the Lingerie Football League. Why can’t i catch these games on esPn... —LV

Whoops, maybe i did have something to say about fashion. ashley eckstein (voice of ahsoka on the Clone Wars, and wife of former st. Louis Cardinals second baseman david eckstein) has created a line of star Wars T shirts aimed at women. all t-shirts have amazing original pieces of art made specifically for ashley’s line. While a bit pricey ($35 for a T-shirt) the shirts are undeniably cool. all the T’s are available on heruniverse.com. —LV

Jessica says: “hear me Raw!” gaga’s final look of the night was her raw meat dress complete with hat and strappy heels (left). Perhaps this was to make up for the black leather gown (below right). The meat shoes look mighty comfortable compared to gaga’s red carpet look of lobster claw heels and an alexander mcQueen gown. “That arch looks mighty painful.” —MV

CostuMes aRe Fashion too i don’t have much to say about fashion. i mean i like sweater vests, so i didn’t see anything about fashion i cared to write about. i did get excited about these stills of upcoming marvel movies. January Jones as emma Frost i like. Captain america stunt double in costume, not so much. —LV

A B is

mArvel, YoU sUck! in 2008 marvel took almost 40 years of story and tossed it out the window. in “one more day,” Peter Parker and mary Jane traded their love and marriage for the life of aunt may in a deal with mephisto, the devil. aunt may had been felled by the bullet of a sniper that was intended for Peter. You see, marvel stupidly had Peter expose himself to the general public. so now everyone knew that Peter and spidey were one and the same. With aunt may lying near death, Peter tried everything possible to save her. at wits end, and on the verge of giving up, mephisto shows up and tells Peter and mary Jane that not only will he revive may, but he will also wipe out the fact that everyone knows who spider-man is. The catch is they have to give up their love and marriage. The decision to end the marriage in such a ridiculous way caused acclaimed writer J. michael stracyzinski to quit his post as writer of the spider-man comics. marvel’s editor-in-chief Joe Quesada decreed that spider-man had to be single, that it makes him more relatable as a character, that it makes him more accessible to the common comic reader. i called bullshit on both counts. if that ridiculous story wasn’t enough the first time, marvel decided to relive the decision with the recent story “one moment in Time.” omiT as it came to be known was a retelling of the events through the eyes of mary Jane. in it we learned what the new ridiculous status quo was. Peter had stood up mJ on the day of his wedding (while fighting crime of course), aunt may had still been shot and healed by Peter’s love (WhaT!?!), Peter with the help of Reed Richards, Tony stark and doctor strange were able

to mind wipe the world and make them forget that Peter was spidey (oK, now that’s just stupid... and i’m tired of mind wipes in comics). at the end of the story we learn that mJ was not mind wiped with the rest of the world. she actually remembered, but fled town to avoid spidey. now she was returning back to nYC to let Peter know it was okay to move on with his life. BaRF. i think this story, and marvel’s mandate that spidey be single was complete crap. are you trying to tell me that superman’s stories suffer because he’s married to Lois? i don’t think so. The fact that spidey has a non-powered partner at home, one he can come home to and vent to makes him, if anything, more relatable. i don’t think of scott summers as inaccessible because he was first married to Jean grey and is now dating emma Frost. in fact, those relationships were a huge part of who he was. They helped define him and his decisions, they made him a more compelling character. i say boo to marvel for taking the easy way out and getting rid of a marriage. if marvel had simply told good stories, spidey’s marriage wouldn’t have had to end on the scrap heap (as do most marriages nowadays). marvel, your shitty editorial direction on spidey sucks. maybe i can make a deal with mephisto and wipe it away. or maybe i can simply contact Reed, Tony and strange and mind wipe the world. nah, not even i would try that one.

Where will i be every Tuesday night in the forseeable future? in front of my TV watching Glee—my favorite new show last season, and now with Lost gone my favorite show on television. it’s sure to wow us with some more amazing vocals and spot on tales from the high school halls. While the premiere struggled to intergrate new characters, it did provide an amazing performance by pop star Charice to Beyonce’s “Listen” from Dreamgirls. if you didn’t catch it, pull it up on You Tube. it’s worth it. The pic below was posted by Britney spears on her Twitter page the day the cast filmed the all-Britney episode. That episode airs next Tuesday the 28th. i can’t wait.

Jackie O Did Not Have Camel Toe

—Tim Gunn

Welcome to Fashion Week Hi Jill, I hope you are having a great week. I just wanted to touch base with you on this new product launch from Braza - the CamelNot, a solution to every leggings, skinny jeans or jeggings wearing lady’s worst nightmare. Product images are included below; also, samples are currently available. Please let me know if you are interested in checking them out. I look forward to your feedback on if this could be a fit for any fall fashion stories you are working on. Best, Ashley

take a ride with me Fashion Week makes me think of all the cabs around the tents, so I’ve decided this story relates. Jodie hopped into a cab and discovered she was in a Dubbs moment...

I’m not a fan of Project Runway. I’m a fan of Tim Gunn. Now in its eighth season, Project Runway is still a joy to tune into not for the train wreck that is Heidi’s English but for the commentary Gunn provides as he strikes one of his three poses and attempts to steer contestants in the right direction. My favorite Project Runway moment, though, will always be Nina Garcia ripping a designer for saying that he needed to create a crappy design in order to appeal to the masses. Garcia’s argument was that the masses are too well-educated now. I would like to think this is true. I would like to think that everyone is learning proportion and shape and color, that we are all

becoming more beautiful on the outside despite our ugly behavior. There seem to be so many Martin Luther’s of the fashion world, dispersing knowledge and clothing to the general public. But Project Runway is on Lifetime now and everything is so safe. I don’t see much visual evidence (including in the mirror) that anyone has really taken in the lessons people like Gunn preach. —MV

Frock ’n’ Roll

Many people associate the idea of an “up” escalator with good fortune. Many people also fail to live outside the box like Amy, Jess and me. Let me explain. We hit Bloomingdale’s for Fashion’s Night Out, and it was a blast, the beneficiary of the down escalator of good fortune (surely that’s a Chinese dish somewhere...). It was fun enough in the early going: I spotted a Shane Battier doppelganger; Sam Talbot was there; we got stiff drinks for free; we enjoyed ’20s-era tunes (more on that later); and we watched an endless parade of pretty people patter by. I half-expected to spot Hansel. Anyway, upward we went, with little to reward our efforts. We did spot Morimoto on the 4h Floor, being grilled about fish population depletion by someone who was likely with PETA (his response: “I just cook the fish”) and Gabriel Aubry on the 7th Floor (we all agreed he’s incredibly pretty), but one more flight up, we’d reached the top, dissatisfied. And so began our slow crawl back down to the ground level—escalator magic time. We turned the corner to board the escalator to the 5th Floor, knowing it was allegedly the karaoke floor, to find a wild throng of people jockeying for photos below. Halfway down the escalator, we knew why: The Real Housewives of New Jersey were on stage, and they proceeded to call up someone to help sing “Pretty Woman.” No, there were no flipped tables, but it was an odd kind of rush to have a fleeting brush with Caroline; she probably knows people who have killed people. Our reality craving satisfied, we moved on to the 4th floor to once again find a stage and a performer. Wondering aloud who it was, we were answered—creepily—by a hovering Bloomies employee: “Oh, that’s Alexa Ray Joel.” Hey, why not? Her music was catchy, her lyrics coyly suggestive, and her appearances in Niche titles were all we needed to hang out for a bit. We’re gluttons for punishment, I guess. The 3rd Floor put us face-to-face with a random guerilla runway show (it was actually pretty professional; I just like the word guerrilla), and on the 2nd Floor was Chip Kidd. I don’t know much about him, except that he’s a designer of some kind, and Jess and Amy were excited about meeting him. And he makes funny faces. (Check the photo.) And to top it all off: Flip Burger, back in the basement, where it all began. How else would you expect us to finish off such a night? Oh, yes: the DJ. His name was Bunker, and he was spinning a Boardwalk Empireinspired soundtrack, complete with a jazzy cover of “Bad, Bad Leroy Brown” by Frank Sinatra. We struck up a brief conversation about it, and I came back to ask if he could send me a copy of his playlist afterward. He did not come through for me. (Sidebar: I am now 0-for-2 in getting a DJ to send me a copy of his playlist. Do they think it’s a thinly veiled attempt at picking them up instead? I mean, the dude handed me his phone and had me enter my e-mail address, and even introduced himself. Where’s the follow-through? I thought there was a mutual understanding this was about the music. Maybe that’s verboten in the DJ world, akin to passing secret nuclear codes to the Chinese. Oh well.) —Tom

Greatest inspiration Tom sent us these pictures of his latest fashion muse and himself. Yes, these are tiny pictures, but I’m sure if you’re a Nicher reading this issue, you’ve already said to Tom, “Hey, you look like a slightly older and bearded version of Shia LeBeouf in The Greatest Game Ever Played. But why are you carrying a tennis racket?”

Jackie O Did Not Have Camel Toe

—Tim Gunn

take a ride with me Fashion Week makes me think of all the cabs around the tents, so I’ve decided this story relates. Jodie hopped into a cab and discovered she was in a Dubbs moment...

Frock ’n’ Roll

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“Let’s go eat a goddamn snack” -rex ryan

get YoUr glee on Chris Colfer Photographed by Robert Trachtenberg for Rolling stone

“When I was young, I thought the World Series meant the Yankees played somebody” -kathy

“Oh boy... Here comes contrarian hour” -John

“Fuck you, rude lady” -madeline

“When you wear your heart on your sleeve, make sure your shirt is f’ing dope.” -mindy kaling

thAt’s A lot of BeAtles

Artist We like:

“Tomorrow is Friday. In Spain, the phrase TGIF would be GADQEV. I’m saying we’re lucky to be Americans.” -Conan o’Brien

JAck kirBY

five things The Random Things on Laurie’s mind

ADW

art department weekly issue 67 vol. 2

fashion the king camel toe fashion’s night out PLus: tom’s inspiration glee returns Laurie’s things

ADW

art department weekly issue 68 vol. 2

john lennon cat lady byrne in hell bedrock birthday PLus: day jobs merch miss Daceyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s things

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“Summer’s in your heart, it’s not on a calendar” -john

“Disposable cameras are great, but kind of a waste” -erin while always shying away from costumes (and logos) Smallville has worked various superheros into their mythos while giving them very easily identifiable looks. supergirl (Laura Vandervoort) debuted on Smallville three seasons ago, but wore only civilian clothing. on her way back for a guest spot, this time her clothing resembles the supergirl costume sans the s shield. geek boys (myself included) cheer in excitement.

SUPer BUFF

was the human Torch that beefy? either Chris evans has been hitting the gym big time or he’s been eating hgh with his wheaties. either way he’s looking more Captain America-y.

“I’m more talented than all of you. I see that now” -brittany

“Stop Bouncing!! I hate it when things BOUNCE!” -jessica

“I’m not cocky. I’m just very self-aware” -luis

“Go ahead. Suck the tongue.” -jase

SUPer BoWl here’s a pic of me and my mom that shows me rockin bowl cut. (Yes, girls had them too! wait—didn’t they?) —Jane

ArtiSt We like:

Justin Timberlake here I come!!! Hopefully shy Jessica will not be out and bold new jess will be out -jessica

JoHn lennon

while it’s not hard for me to think of a comic artist i like with a name that starts with L, it seemed a good time to talk about a musical artist. This week would have been John Lennon’s 70th birthday. As you know, Lennon was one of the founding members of the beatles, and along with writing partner P aul mcCartney, one of the most prolific songwriters of all-time. Paul

most people don’t realize that the most beatles b eatles were not John’s first attempt at fforming orming a band. his first attempt was a group named the Quarrymen. The Quarrymen bore a strong resemblance to the beatles as Paul mcCartney and george harrison were member as well. After some reshuffling of bass players, the group was renamed the beatles (the orginal Quarrymen name coming from the Quarry bank school they attended). mcCartney later said of Lennon, “we all looked up to John. he was older ... the quickest wit and the smartest.” Due to the death of their bass player stuart sutcliffe, mcCartney took over the bass playing duties and they ousted their original drummer to bring on ringo starr. Thus a sound was born and a revolution about to be embarked upon. The beatles started to receive mainstream success in 1963. All of which set the stage for the band’s debut in the states a year later on the ed sullivan show. A two-year whirlwind of international superstardom occured. At the height of the band’s popularity, they were almost exclusively playing Lennon/mcCartney penned songs. The songs were infectious rock which still stand the test of time. Catchy, lyrics and tunes were a hallmark of their sound. it was accessible, upbeat music for a nation being dragged into the doldrums. As the ‘60s wore one, the band while still a huge commercial success started touring less. Concerned with this Lennon considered quitting the band and turned to drugs. This more psychadelic period saw Lennon infuse lyrics with a moe surreal tone. Listen to Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds, I am the Walrus and Strawberry Fields Forever, the lyrics seem right out of a Lewis Carrol story. with a new marriage, and feeling constrained by the trappings of the supergroup, Lennon would become an outspoken critic of the Vietnam war. At the same time Yoko and he were producing three experimental albums. none were huge hits. in 1969 Lennon released the anti-war song “give Peace a Chance,” which was then followed by “Cold Turkey,” a song about his giving up drugs.

with the beatles fully broken up by 1970, Lennon entered intense therapy. This therapy allowed his to deal with lots of emotional issues and start to create very honest and introspective solo work. Listen to Mother and Working Class Hero which were released in 1970 and the iconic Imagine which was released in 1971 to get a sense of the new Lennon which had emerged. Lennon recorded solo music until 1975 when he retired to focus on his family. he did return to music in 1980 with a new

album, but shortly thereafter he was murdered. he was posthumously entered into the songwriters hall of Fame as well as the rock ‘n roll hall of Fame. Lennon’s post-beatles career is best summed up in his own words shortly before his death: “if you can imagine a world at peace, with no denominations of religion—not without religion, but without this ‘my god is bigger than your god’ thing—then it can be true.” This isn’t the most persuasive piece, but just give Lennon a chance. —LV

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the random things on dacey’s mind

suPremeLy sPicy sabra hummas

easily my kryptonite. You give me a bag of Tostitos and a full container of supremely spicy sabra hummas, you will be looking at someone who just consumed 2,000+ calories in about 5 minutes.

Five ridicuLous sounding yoga Positions:

one-Legged king Pigeon Cow Face reclining big Toe Laughing Lotus Upward Facing Plank caLL oF duty: modern warFare 2 - the Famas assauLt riFLe

which one did i make up?

my personal favorite, this bad-boy makes the Ak-47 look like a .22 winchester. with serious range and accuracy, blast enemies from out of range or throw on the grenade launcher attachment to cause a serious stir in Free-For-All and Team Deathmatch

why do i Like vamPires so much?

i wouldn’t consider myself a ‘trendy’ guy, but i have totally fallen for this whole vampire craze way more than i like to admit. while i maintain that i have not—and will not—ever watch/read any of the Twilight nonsense, i think True Blood is the greatest show since The Sopranos. Leave it to hbo to bring you sex, violence, intrigue, and comedy in a fantastical setting, with everything from white-trash rednecks to smoking-hot waitresses. god bless you hbo.

john Prine The greatest

American songwriter you have probably never heard of. moving songs about love, loss, and the average man. most famous songs include “Angel From montgomery,” “hello in There,” “illegal smile,” and “sam stone,” which consequently all came off of his debut album in 1971.

AHH, FAll when did Fall become so gloomy? i anticipate Fall more than most people. my great hate of summer makes me wish for its end earlier and earlier each year—this year more so than most. The ridiculous heat was incredibly unbearable. And then, bam, it’s Fall. This Fall has washed ashore, soaking everything in cold, miserable rain. instead of seeing fallen leaves in beautiful colors, all i see is the inside of my umbrella. (no, i don’t really carry an umbrella. i’m a man.) hopefully the tropical storms, hurricanes and all the other craziness hitting our area passes. (Though i wrote this letter two weeks ago and it’s still raining.) we need the weather to get better soon; i’m planning on the Yanks playing till deep into october (if not november). Typical crisp, sunny Fall weather isn’t the only usual plus of the season. september brings the launch of the new TV season. no more repeats. however, most nights my TV is glued to sports and my DVr is stockpiling shows i didn’t finish last season (e.g. Chuck and Fringe), but i do get excited for nbC’s Thursday night schedule and of course the new season of Glee. Fall also brings us back to school. which means less time for the Dubbs... good parts of Fall, please get here. This week’s issue also brings us the dawn of a new column, byrne in hell,

written by John byrne. not the famous comic artist, but the executive Director of market research here at Maxim. Listening to John’s views is always one of the highlights of my day. now they’ll be in the pages of the Dubbs every week (or whenever it is we come out). Artists we Like focuses on one of the greatest and most influential artists of all-time, John Lennon. To celebrate what would have been Lennon’s 70th birthday, let’s remember why he is so important to the musical landscape. Julie bensman returns to the Dubbs after a long absence with a story on her volunteering at the cat shelter. while i am already a cat owner (not a cat lover—big difference) i almost signed up to get another one after reading her story. mike Dacey checks in and lets us know what Five Things are in his mind. For someone who was born in ’87 (that’s after mookie grounded the ball through bukner’s legs... insanity) he’s actually pretty well-rounded. Till the next issue...

george Lucas made his Star Wars fortune by holding on to the merchandising rights from the original film and then slapping his logos and characters on everything possible once the movie proved to be a huge hit. by the time the Star Wars prequels were released in the late ’90s just about everything had a star wars tie-in. Action figures, video games, pens, pencils, candy tins, happy meal toys were all emblazoned with star wars branding. For the most part these were spot on, and for folks who were too young for the original trilogy, but now had disposable income, we could collect to our hearts content. in this particular instance, though, the tie-in was as an epic fail. Pictured here is the jar jar binks candy tongue LoLLiPoP, a lollipop i basically have to french kiss to eat. You push the lollipop up, Jar Jar opens his mouth and you then suck his tongue. how did george Lucas greenlight this? it’s quite possibly the most offensive movie tie-in ever. i, of course, possess two of these.

Five tHinGS

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the random things on dacey’s mind

suPremeLy sPicy sabra hummas

easily my kryptonite. You give me a bag of Tostitos and a full container of supremely spicy sabra hummas, you will be looking at someone who just consumed 2,000+ calories in about 5 minutes.

Five ridicuLous sounding yoga Positions:

one-Legged king Pigeon Cow Face reclining big Toe Laughing Lotus Upward Facing Plank caLL oF duty: modern warFare 2 - the Famas assauLt riFLe

which one did i make up?

why do i Like vamPires so much?

john Prine The greatest

Held over from before the Fashion Issue... see the well-dressed Federer

see the wiling assistant

Cat lady

Byrne in Hell vol 1

As some people in the office know and my cube neighbors can confirm, I am a closet cat lady. While my four bedroom, one bathroom, three roommate SoHo apartment situation isn’t conducive to owning a cat, I volunteer at a shelter (kittykind.org, if you are looking to adopt!) and spend even more time online researching cat videos. I spent a significant part of my day exchanging these gems with my friends who also have jobs which require them to keep their fingers “on the pulse” by surfing the web. If you also share a penchant for the feline kind, check out some of my favorite sites and videos below (the last is an Alpaca video, but I figured Luis would enjoy the soundtrack). Enjoy!

Things bothering me this week:

youtube.com/watch?v=A4I_hH4dl9w

Adults who use the word “party” as a verb. Your teenage self left you a

huffingtonpost.com/2010/06/21/cats-they-just-dont-give_n_619807. html?ref=fb&src=sp#s103341 youtube.com/watch?v=I-VfjutIg8s youtube.com/watch?v=nN4CqDy3Qgk&feature=player_embedded#! youtube.com/watch?v=1gZ0x8AVaBI&feature=related –Julie

People taking the trash out in their pajamas. No one wants to see

that. Singing aloud to your iPod, anywhere. You like the song, I get it,

but you know what I like? You not singing.

message: Dear adult me, Don’t ever contact me again. We had a good run and now it’s over. Move on. Talking on your phone while checking out at any store. I’m

going to go out on a limb and say your conversation can wait. The counterpeople at Five Guys on 48th Street screaming in my ear under the guise of being heard.

Bedrock birthday

The Flintstones turns 50 this week, and I thought we should take a minute to say happy birthday as well as thank you. You see, without The Flintstones, you probably don’t have The Simpsons today. While The Simpsons is unquestionably edgier, and aimed at an older audience, The Flintstones paved the way for primetime animation. It also provided the blueprint formula for many sitcoms that followed. Although it was a loose homage to The Honeymooners, The Flintstones marital banter, wacky husband hijinks, and camaraderie between neighbors are all prevalent in sitcoms today. The Flintstones are also credited with being the first television show to show a husband and wife in bed together (Fred and Wilma) as well as having adoptive parents as main characters (Barney and Betty who adopted Bam Bam). And just think of all that green technology. Fred’s car was powered by his feet! Yabba Dabba Doo. —LV

For whatever reason, you’re pissed, it’s obvious. Don’t pretend you have to yell to do your job. That’s reserved for search parties and carnival barkers, not a counterperson. Besides, that place ain’t that big. Coming to a complete stop while walking in the middle of the sidewalk. The rule is if you wouldn’t do

it on the highway, don’t do it when you’re walking. Waitstaff who are slow to refill your water glass. It’s water, it’s free,

I know it doesn’t help your tip percentage, but if you think about it, it really does. Besides, I’m thirsty. Watching you get to the front of any line, then seeing you realize it’s going to take money to complete your transaction, then rifling through your

crap for 90 seconds in search of the $3.80 you need, most of which is accounted for with dimes. Stuff isn’t free—plan ahead and have your money ready. Hearing laudatory comments about Vampire Weekend’s Radio City concerts. Enough said. Paying $13 for a movie and then

having Johnny Talkalot and his wife whisper intermittently until the bitter, bitter end. Your comments are neither funny nor insightful. If they were, you’d have your own TV or radio show. Instead, you’re behind me on a Sunday afternoon. Zip it.

see federer take aim

Getting together for dinner with friends and talking about work.

The people you do that with are called co-workers, and you get paid to do that. No one is paying me to eat with you and listen to you prattle on about how the girl who sits two aisles away from you is just so dumb and super annoying. If you want to pay me to talk about work, I’m good with that. Otherwise, let’s talk about something else. Pushing a less-than-regulationsized shopping cart around a less-than-regulation-sized supermarket in NYC. All the evidence

see federer knock the can off the assistant’s head

one needs that NYC is a stopover between childhood and adulthood, an island of suspended development. Don’t think it’s true? Look around, the signs are everywhere. My flame-retardant suit—what’s keeping me sane: Taking my dog for a

walk at 6:45 on a Sunday morning, when the street seems to be all mine and everything looks, feels and smells better than it will just three hours later.

laugh, ad agency people, laugh. Ask him to do it again.

Held over from before the Fashion Issue... see the well-dressed Federer

see the wiling assistant

Cat lady

Byrne in Hell vol 1

Things bothering me this week:

youtube.com/watch?v=A4I_hH4dl9w

Adults who use the word “party” as a verb. Your teenage self left you a

People taking the trash out in their pajamas. No one wants to see

that. Singing aloud to your iPod, anywhere. You like the song, I get it,

but you know what I like? You not singing.

message: Dear adult me, Don’t ever contact me again. We had a good run and now it’s over. Move on. Talking on your phone while checking out at any store. I’m

going to go out on a limb and say your conversation can wait. The counterpeople at Five Guys on 48th Street screaming in my ear under the guise of being heard.

Bedrock birthday

it on the highway, don’t do it when you’re walking. Waitstaff who are slow to refill your water glass. It’s water, it’s free,

see federer take aim

Getting together for dinner with friends and talking about work.

see federer knock the can off the assistant’s head

walk at 6:45 on a Sunday morning, when the street seems to be all mine and everything looks, feels and smells better than it will just three hours later.

laugh, ad agency people, laugh. Ask him to do it again.

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“Summer’s in your heart, it’s not on a calendar” -john

SUPer BUFF

was the human Torch that beefy? either Chris evans has been hitting the gym big time or he’s been eating hgh with his wheaties. either way he’s looking more Captain America-y.

“I’m more talented than all of you. I see that now” -brittany

“Stop Bouncing!! I hate it when things BOUNCE!” -jessica

“I’m not cocky. I’m just very self-aware” -luis

“Go ahead. Suck the tongue.” -jase

SUPer BoWl here’s a pic of me and my mom that shows me rockin bowl cut. (Yes, girls had them too! wait—didn’t they?) —Jane

ArtiSt We like:

Justin Timberlake here I come!!! Hopefully shy Jessica will not be out and bold new jess will be out -jessica

JoHn lennon

ADW

art department weekly issue 68 vol. 2

john lennon cat lady byrne in hell bedrock birthday PLus: day jobs merch miss Daceyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s things