Roxanne tandem nurses her daughters, celebrating her health and deep bond to her girls with henna art.
Words from the Creative Director….1 A Mother’s Blessing………..........2 Roll with the Punches of BIRTH.........……3 Mother’s ART...…...7 Moon Mama……..9 Poetry: Nothing is Wrong with the Present Moment...15 3 Most Common, but not Normal, Issues after Birth..........23 The Bond Project.........25 Check out our Community Partners on Artfullmother.com
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Ah, it’s summer in Colorado; such a beautiful, inspiring season. I have included some of the gorgeous models from last year at this time. I didn’t really know what I was getting into when we photographed lovely Kymbre belly dancing in the sweet summer fields of Lafayette; this was an inspirational moment for both Rob and I! As was this beautiful mama tandem nursing her young, as natural as the blooming purple flowers. Deborah McNamara, a Boulder Artfull Mother and our resident poet, shares another of her poems on page 15, and a gorgeous “mama to be” greets the rising summer sun. We have another installment of the 4th Trimester section; I am genuinely excited to share some of the conversations I had with these ladies. Their sincerity, ingenuity and determination to do what they could, in the moment, for their families and themselves inspires me and gives me hope for our future. Our cover model Ashlea invited me to bring henna to her mother blessing celebration at her home in Thornton this Spring. This was a heartwarming experience; she was genuinely thrilled by the love and support showered on her. I adorned Ashlea with henna as a blessing and then painted all of the guests, who wanted to join in. I had a great time, bringing love and well wishes for this beautiful mamma. Samantha shares another story in her on-going Bond Project, sharing the personal stories and authentic photographs of mothers, their challenges and victories. In this edition, Sheila is dealing with oversupply. Read about her journey on page 25. (Are you an Artfull Mother? Do you Love Art and Babies? Do you have a story to tell? Contact me, we are looking for you!)
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Ashlea’s friend was putting together a small Mother’s Blessing to celebrate her 3rd pregnancy and she asked if I would come and adorn her belly and friends. It was wonderful to hear how loved and supported Ashlea felt! When I arrived at the party there were delicious treats on the counter and a candle making station. Ashlea was
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surrounded by friends and family, and the room was full of women’s laughter and babies cooing. As I applied the henna paste, the women added a bead to a bracelet and shared it’s meanings with her. Afterwards, we showered her with rose petals as I took photos. I love women’s ceremonies like this!
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I have heard so many mothers talk about
how important it is to get out of the house and socialize, especially with groups of other new mothers. This was my lovely “4th Trimester” mama’s experience as well. When I asked Takiyah about what she did for socializing, she lit up telling me about how much she loved going to the the Family Garden in Longmont (which sadly, it closed it’s doors May, 2017). While pregnant, She enjoyed prenatal yoga and afterwards stayed for the momand-me groups. After she had her baby, she attended their nursing group, where a lactation consultant would be available to give advice and weigh the babies. Along with the Family Garden, Takiyah told me about how she loved going to the libraries as well which had meetings at different times of the day for different baby ages. She also started to developing friendships with other new moms at a local church they liked. From this group of moms, she found a Mom’s meet-up, “Moms of Longmont,” that she also visits. Takiyah’s advice for other, soon to be moms is, “Be active and get out when you can. Getting fresh air makes a huge difference. Do what you can, don’t try to do everything and don’t be afraid to ask for help! Don’t be too proud - you’re being a great mother - but it takes a village! Finding that village, that tribe, is an important part of maintaining your sanity as a mother.” Takiyah had always planned on having a ‘natural birth.’ Her pregnancy had a different idea; she started bleeding sporadically at 5 weeks and began feeling contractions at 25 weeks. Keeping calm and positive were necessary to keep her stress levels in check, and important to her healthy pregnancy. She didn’t have the ‘natural birth’ experience she was expecting, but as she looked back on her experience, keeping calm and positive throughout this trying pregnancy and birth was the thing she was most proud of and worth all of the hard work. I met Takiyah at 32 weeks to celebrate her pregnancy with henna, though she never made it back (3 days later, after the henna darkens fully) for photos, or for her birth classes or maternity photos she had scheduled. Turned out, her water broke early and she was rushed by ambulance from Longmont all the way to Aurora. Terrified, she focused on keeping calm and trusting the doctors would do what was best for both her and the baby. Though her birth plan included a natural birth, her situation required something different, and she accepted medication. She was very happy to be able to have the vaginal delivery she had hoped for, despite doctors telling her it may not even be an option. In only 4 pushes, Enim was out and on her chest. Takiyah got to have the skin to skin time she requested, directly after birth. Her husband was able to cut the cord before baby Enim was placed in a bassinet, where 9 doctors encircled him. At one point she heard, “He’s not breathing!” Enim would end up spending 26 long days in the NICU before he came home. However, I am thrilled to report that by the time we met for this interview, Enim was a happy 10 month old, healthy and totally adorable. Takiyah’s advice to pregnant mothers: “Have a plan in mind, but also be willing to go with the flow. Nothing is set in stone. The less you are attached 4
to a plan, the more open you can be to other good possibilities that can happen, because you definitely can’t control everything. You have to ‘roll with the punches’ and if you’re not attached, you won’t get as upset or cause yourself more unnecessary stress if things change. Do your best to remain open to the process of giving birth. Initially I was livid because - he’s going to be in NICU! I said, ‘He’s healthy, he just has a low birth weight, but he’s fine, they just want to make sure he can breathe, swallow and suck at the same time without choking, so he had a feeding tube.’ I was able to give him my milk through the feeding tube which was a small comfort. At first I was upset and hurt, but I didn’t want to transfer those feelings to my baby, just being open to whatever may come really helped.” “It was hard, we basically stayed at the hospital and hotels for the entire time he was in NICU [26 days]. Being able to appreciate he was fine and trust that even though this wasn’t ideal, he was healthy and well cared for made a big difference. Had I been more attached to what I wanted to happen, may have kept the anger around longer and I would have missed out on some special moments with him in the beginning. He had a great staff of nurses and docs looking after him and just being open to the process made it bearable. It was difficult, it took a while, though once I understood this is the way it is and it could be worse, I was able to experience some really beautiful moments with him. It was very scary, even though I knew he was going to be fine; when you are NICU and there are sirens going off all the time, and some of the other babies were in much worse condition than he was, is very frightening. I prayed for him and all the other babies and sent out positive energy to them as well.”
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I want to thank Takiyah for sharing her story and advice. We are all very pleased that she and baby are fine; her main focus, for now, is to be a stay at home mom and take care of baby Enim and her husband, in lovely Longmont, Colorado.
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Being a mother, raising a child is the ultimate CREATIVE act a human being can achieve. Creating and nurturing a new life raises her status to mother. Assuming the responsibility for a new life; even if she does not carry the child in her womb, the adaptation of ‘everything you are,’ rising to the role of Momma, is personally transformative and hugely creative. Creating, influencing, filling the ‘empty vessel’ that is a mother’s heart before her child arrives is so subtle, so unique and personal, it often goes uncelebrated or even acknowledged. The mother will feel it, though mostly retroactively. Luckily, the one place where it is evident, obvious even… is to that new little one, by whom this preparation is inspired. The “motherhood makeover” touches every part of who you are. What songs do you sing to motivate or bless your child? What stories do you make up? What art do you make? How do you mark motherhood? Think of your specially picked books on your child’s bookshelf, the colors of their little clothing, the lunches... your box of saved art pieces, your framed photos, albums... some of you may make art around it: potions you brew, poems you write, songs you compose, collages you make, dances to celebrate, birthday traditions, costumes for Halloween... There are unlimited ways to express it! I, SarahKate, am an Artfull Mother and I personally LOVE adorning mothers as my ART. I love to hear their stories and share them with you. I also love to draw. Truthfully, I am a compulsive doodler! Here I am exploring a new medium - window art markers.
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“I am a moon priestess, plant magician and Creatrix of delicious foods, potions and elixirs.� -Moon Mama Jessica 7
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“We’re going to do this awesome project, get ready! Shhhhh,” Jessica says as she holds the match. All of a sudden she strikes it, and her child knows something big is about to happen as the candle is lit. She explains that the herbal medicine she makes for new mothers requires deep focus and the more intense you can make the ceremony of making it start, the more focused a child can be to help. Juniper, age 3, grinds the portioned herbs, helping to add salt and oils. “It’s my favorite thing to let her go crazy, to just grind or stir, or if I portion out oils ahead of time, then she can pour the whole thing in or just drip drip drip… so I’m not like, “Stop right there!” I met Jessica during her 1st pregnancy and I adorned her with henna; our paths have crossed a few times since, mostly in women’s circles. I was blessed to help celebrate her 2nd pregnancy with henna too! While we talked, I learned how Jessica makes soothing body products and herbal elixirs. Her potions are laid out under the full moon to gather healing powers, and intensified with her powerful, loving intentions. On her kitchen table is a Waldorf-style, chunky wooden puzzle, with moon phase- pieces, able to demonstrate the moon’s phases. A vegetarian for years before her mother knew how to cook for one, Jessica found herself interested in health and nutrition, she eventually moved to the Boulder area to go to school for Herbalism. When Jessica was pregnant with her first baby, she was on a trajectory to become a midwife, “but after my baby was born, I saw that there was such a gap in care. Everyone wants the high of the birth and it is amazing. You’re there and you want to be there all the time. In that experience! All of the time! Standing at that gateway is chilling and thrilling, right? 31 9
There’s big work to be done postpartum and moms need support; my passion is there.” Jessica involves her daughter in both of the services she provides postpartum mamas. One of the services she provides for women is the encapsulation of their placentas. The process involves honoring the placenta and returning a small portion of it to the earth. “What 3 year old doesn’t want to dig a hole in the ground? Then I’ll say, ‘Now we are honoring this placenta.’ and she knows, we are grateful for it. I explained to her this is what we do, what women do for each other, this is part of a mom’s work in the world.” I have no doubt this sharp little one, ‘gets it.’ I deeply respect Jessica’s work in the world with postpartum women, I am moved with her loving inclusion and creating a place for her daughter where they can learn, grow and work together. Hats off to you Jessica, Artfull Mother! Jessica Bates has two businesses serving mothers: A Mother’s Touch Postpartum (https://www.amotherstouchpostpartum.com/) And Moon Mother Medicinals (https://www.amotherstouchpostpartum.com/medicinals)
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We are celebrating the 10th issue of Artfull Mother Magazine!
What started out as a small seed of an idea has grown into a blooming flower. Our magazine has covered so many fascinating interviews with local doulas, house-call doctors and other birth professionals. We’ve shared amazing birth stories and the stories of local mothers figuring out how to breastfeed. We have had an abundance of poetry from local poets and shared stories of local artists. We’ve delved into what it means to have a sacred pregnancy, birth and postpartum, as well as dealing with postpartum depression. With every issue we strive to share an authentic look at how great it is, and what some of the challenges are, for expectant/new mothers right here on the Front Range of Colorado.
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Poetry by Deborah McNamara, a Boulder mama. She is a yoga teacher, environmental educator and the mother of 3 sweet boys. Read more on her blog: Motherhood as a Spiritual Art. www.unraveledword.wordpress.com 914 16
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Monet has an amazing way of capturing such tender details, like brand new baby feet with the umbilical cord. We rarely marvel at this lifeline that connects our babies to us for nine months. Take a moment to check out its natural strength & beauty. This dear baby was born healthy and soon turned a lovely shade of pink.. http://www.monetnicole.com/
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I adorned Lyndsay 10 days before her due date; her design featured a moon, stars and lilies. As it turns out, she gave birth a week early making her henna only a few days old when she gave birth!
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Shortly after giving birth, Lyndsay invited us to visit her at home where I took some dear photos of her holding her baby girl near the apple tree in her backyard. It is a rare treat when a mama’s henna goes through birth with her and I feel especially grateful to capture it! ~SarahKate
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After carrying and delivering a baby,
your body is stretched to the brink. Your abdominal tissues and your pelvis go through so much. There is no longer a sense of normalcy left in your body after birth. Not only does your body not feel the same anymore, you might be dealing with some issues that make life a bit or a whole lot more challenging. We will discuss three of the most common issues I hear from moms after birth. While they may be common, they are NOT NORMAL! You can heal from these issues; you just need to know how!
1. Peeing your pants
Leaking urine when you laugh, cough, or sneeze is a very common complaint moms have after birth. There are a couple of components creating this issue for you. Your core gets compromised from carrying your baby and birthing so it needs help in gaining strength again. Continue reading to learn the first step in activating your core. Your bladder gets squished off to the left hand side when the baby comes out and sometimes that can cause more leakage. Getting internal bladder mobilization by a professional can help with this. Sometimes the way you contract your abdominal muscles may be contributing to more pressure being placed on your bladder. If you are
pushing your urine out, please stop as that can cause greater problems. How to contract your inner core: Lay on your back, with your knees bent upwards. As you breathe in, allow the air to expand your ribs in every direction and just let your belly go along for the ride. Don’t do belly breathing, that can strain healing abdominal tissues. As you exhale, do a kegel FIRST and allow your lower belly to contract back like it’s hollowing out. Do a gentle contraction of your abs, not a strong one. Sometimes moms will contract their oblique muscles with a stronger contraction, which actually can cause greater downward force pushing the bladder out! This is not good! You should feel a lifting up and inside you with the kegel and lower transverse abdominal muscles contracting. There’s so much more to learn about this that I just can’t cover in this article. Attending my FREE How to Lose the Pooch for Good class is a great place to start to learn more about your core and your postpartum body. https://www.schedulicity.com/scheduling/ IHP67J then click on CLASSES
2. Pain with intercourse
Oblique Stretch: There are two types of pain with intercourse Lay on your back on a hard surface with your knees bent up. You need to make sure your lower ribcage is touching the ground. If it is after birth. One is insertional pain and is not, put a pillow or two under your head until they come in contact caused by the pelvic floor muscles not bewith the floor. Hold your right lower ribcage down with your right ing able to relax and open up enough. Scar tissue and increased tone in your pelvic floor hand so it stays connected to the floor while you lower your knees to the left. Only lower your knees as far as your ribs stay touching the muscles can inhibit the tissues from being able to stretch like they need to for insertion. floor. As soon as your ribs pop off the floor you need to stop lowering your knees. With your left hand reach over to your right side of your Massaging your scar tissue and your pelvic floor muscles can help them relax and release waist and being in contact with your skin, encourage your oblique muscles, under your hand, to come toward the midline. Repeat on the for intercourse. Please don’t try intercourse other side. more than a couple of times if it is painIf you are experiencing significant pain or diminished quality of life ful. The pain should diminish with each with these issues, please contact your healthcare provider. attempt, if it’s getting better. If it stays the same, please come have a session. A lot of my mom’s only need one session to be able to Lynn Schulte Leech, received her BS in Physical Therapy from Saint Louis University in 1990. She has continued to develop her skills through enjoy intercourse again, without pain! continuing education courses with a focus on the pelvis, Women’s Health Issues, Craniosacral Therapy and Visceral Manipulation. She is one of a The other issue with sex is deep thrusting few practitioners in the country that is certified in Holistic Pelvic Care, pain. This is more common after cesarean which is a unique approach to physically and energetically realign your births. All your vaginal tissues need to be pelvis. Lynn Can be contacted by phone 303-845-0604 or at her website: able to move up and down for thrusting. www.instituteForBirthHealing.com When you have scar tissue in the uterus from the surgery it will attach to everything nearby to heal. This can create a restriction in your lower abdomen and the tissues lose their ability to move up and down during thrusting. This is what causes pain. Massaging your cesarean scar can help eliminate the pain. My YouTube channel, Institute For Birth Healing, has a video that shows you exactly how to do this, How to Massage your C/S scar. Check out the video here: https://youtu.be/p-VfUJ6JcWo
SARAHKATE’S NOTE: I have had the pleasure to know Lynn for a few years now and have had the opportunity to see her results of her work in many women she touches. Of the many postpartum providers in our area, Lynn is one of the finest, most skilled, knowledgeable and effective I know. If you have had a baby in the last 5 years, chances are she can help you. If you are in pain or have any of the symptoms, make an appointment today and go see Lynn; she will improve your life.
3. Diastasis Recti
While it’s very common for your abdominal muscles to separate during pregnancy, this is called, Diastasis Recti (DR), they are not meant to stay that way. Natural healing of your abdominal muscles should happen within the first couple of months post birth. The body wants to heal and come together when you allow it. There are many factors that go into healing DR. From your posture, to the way you breathe and move and use your body, these all need to be addressed to allow healing to occur. I find that one of the most important steps to healing is stretching your oblique muscles. They really get tight during pregnancy and can keep your recti muscles from coming back together to heal.
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by Samantha Jessup The Bond Project strives
to support and lend understanding to moms feeding their babies; those who are breastfeeding, as well as those who cannot or choose not to breastfeed, and those who supplement with formula or donor milk. Samantha’s passion and understanding on this subject is best experienced by reading the stories and viewing her photos of these mothers. I am honored to get a chance to work with Samantha and I’m very pleased with the results of how my henna work and Samantha’s outstanding phototography came together on this project.
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How did the first days of breastfeeding go for you and Scarlett? Our first few days, and even weeks, of breastfeeding were pretty challenging. Scarlett couldn’t latch very well and when she did latch it was very shallow and uncomfortable. Part of this was due to my insane oversupply which also made me very engorged for weeks. In order to help these issues, I pumped in the early days. Once we decided to get her back to the breast, we used a nipple shield to help her until about 6 weeks. Being blessed with an oversupply comes with its own problems. Until Scarlett was about 3 months old, I woke up painfully engorged and would pump about 10 ounces every morning. I pumped 12 ounces in a single session when she was 4 days old which is way more than any baby needs at that age. Although it was a hassle to pump every morning, I am grateful for my oversupply. I have been able to give my baby all the milk she could possibly need and I have also donated a few hundred ounces of milk to several local moms and been able to give all of their babies the best nutrition as well. Now that she is 6 months old, how have things changed? This can be from your flow of nursing to the little quirks she has to ask for it or when she is nursing. Now that she is older, Scarlett is quite the distracted eater; any sound will make her pull away and spray milk all over the place which is both annoying and humorous. She has recently started to be pretty vocal when she wants to nurse- she’s started pulling on my shirt and trying to undo the snaps. Just last night when we were going to bed, she crawled onto my chest and tried to pull my shirt out of the way, but ended up just trying to eat right through my shirt. She also nurses
for comfort more than she did when she was younger, it’s sometimes the only way she will take a nap. Has anything been particularly difficult about nursing? Scarlett’s shallow latch has been a constant battle even to this day. Some days she just doesn’t want to get a good latch, especially when she is tired. She has also been teething since she was 2 months old, so biting is something we’ve had to work on and will have to continue to work on now that she has her first tooth! What are you doing to work on her biting? When Scarlett bites, I poke her cheek to get her to let go, I say loudly “ouch, no biting” and I set her on the floor to play until the next time she needs to eat. I will say, once she gets her first tooth I expect it will get a lot more painful and be more difficult to unlatch her when she bites, but I do not intend to let it affect our breastfeeding goals. How has nursing Scarlett helped you bond with her from the beginning to now? Being able to comfort her in just a few moments just through nursing her is something that makes me feel like a great mom. Through nursing, I am able to comfort her, nourish her, and heal her all in one go, it’s truly incredible. When she is sleepy and drifting off to sleep she holds my hand and she makes me feel like a better person; it really is a two-way street. What are your goals with nursing or are you just taking it one day at a time? Our goal is to breastfeed for at least two years and even longer if that is what works for us. I want to give Scarlett the best nutrition I can for as long as I can.
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Where do you find support in your journey? My biggest supporter is my husband. Nathan has been completely with me on our breastfeeding goals and journey since Day One. If I am having a rough day with a clogged duct or sore nipples, he is there to tell me that I am doing a great job for our little girl. I also have a good friend, Jessica, who is still breastfeeding her 1 and 3 year old and has been an amazing help with everything about motherhood and breastfeeding. Nathan also has some cousins with little ones around Scarlett’s age that have been great encouragers of breastfeeding and we all support each other in our journeys.
No one has pushed back against my breastfeeding really. I was asked to not breastfeed in front of my grandfather, and because I was a new mom and still nervous about breastfeeding in front of people, I agreed and fed Scarlett in our bedroom before rejoining our family. That is something I’m not going to do again; I am now much more confident with our breastfeeding relationship and I won’t hide in my room. My mom has made comments about adding cereal to a bottle so she sleeps longer, and about a woman nursing a toddler, so I’m going to have to educate my whole family on the benefits of breastfeeding past infancy.
How have you handled breastfeeding in public? At the beginning when I was nervous, I just put my head down and didn’t look up to see if anyone was staring or making comments. Now that I am more confident, I acknowledge people when they look and just give them a smile, and most people smile back and just go about their day.
What advice do you have for other moms? I know breastfeeding is hard at the beginning. Even with all the classes I went to, my husband’s support, and a lactation consultant telling me I was doing a good job, there were still times I wanted to give up. Those first few days when I was struggling to feed Scarlett I cried my eyes out, but I stuck to it and I am so grateful that I did. Knowing that my baby is getting the absolute best nutrition that is completely tailored to her needs is what got me through those hard days.
What do the images of your nursing mean to you? I feel like the images of our nursing will go a long way to normalizing breastfeeding even in just my own family. These images have also given me more confidence in myself and my ability to nurse in public. Breastfeeding is something I really am passionate about and these pictures will help spread knowledge and awareness about the beauty and benefits of breastfeeding.
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Has some of your family pushed back with you breastfeeding?
Even if it takes months to really get a handle on breastfeeding, just stick with it. Get help when you need it there are so many resources to help new breastfeeding moms. Don’t be afraid to ask for help as many times as you need and for as long as you need, there is no reason to do it alone. Story by Samantha Jessup of
MiracleKisses.com
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